Chapter Text
The League of Villains watched the news in the living room of their newest base of operations; the usual suburban home. After breaking in, swiftly silencing the current occupants, and setting up the basic necessities, they called the place a temporary home. Majority of the league was currently spending their time watching the news for any updates about the current situation in society.
"Furthermore," the news woman spoke into the camera. "Pro Hero Endeavour rescued forty-seven people, who were trapped in the rubble of a building which suddenly collapsed sometime around noon. Authorities suspect that the criminal organization known as the League of Villains, also known as the L.O.V., to be behind this."
"Pfft." Shigaraki scoffed. "I could've done that job ten times better than that walking matchstick."
"Yeah, you'd be a great asset to the Sake News department." Dabi chuckled. "Don't think you'd be able to hold the microphone, unless you held your pinky out like a grandmother drinking tea."
"I wasn't talking about the news woman, idiot." Shigaraki rolls his eyes. "I'm talking about Endeavour. That bitch. He's lousy at his job. Sure, he packs a punch, but he's completely clueless about how to actually do anything other than fight. I could've dusted that wreckage and saved those people in a fraction of the time it took him."
"What, thinking about going rogue?" Spinner questioned. "Start a hero agency or something?"
Shigaraki shook his head. "I'm simply pointing out how corrupt the hero society is. Hero's don't know how to do anything but fight."
"Shiggy, I love you, but if you start another rant about 'corruption' or 'justice', I will stab you." Toga groaned.
"Just saying." Shigaraki shrugged. The league remained quiet for a few seconds, enjoying the news for a little while longer, before Dabi spoke up.
"You'd make a shit hero." Dabi said.
"No kidding." Shigaraki said. "I mean, I'd be better at it than you, but yeah."
"What makes you so sure, lip balm?" Dabi challenged.
"I could actually do something with my quirk." Shigaraki responded. "Destroy rubble to get to people, dust thieves, and such. What would you do? You'd kill the criminal and the person you'd try to save."
"I have experience." Dabi said.
Shigaraki rolled his eyes again. "Burning junkies who cross you isn't experience."
"Professional experience. From a pro hero." Dabi grins.
"Oooh." Toga said excitedly. "I smell a tragic backstory. Go on, tell!"
"Yeah, Dabi." Shigaraki said as he sat up straight to face Dabi. "Tell."
"Sorry, you don't meet the friendship requirements." Dabi shrugged, repositioning himself so that his legs draped over the side of the sofa. "You need to get to at least level twenty-five friendship with me before you can unlock my 'tragic backstory'."
"What about me?" Toga interjected with enthusiasm. "I could be an awesome hero, just like Izuku!"
"You? Ha! Please!" Dabi said as he let out a loud burst of laughter. Toga's face fell. "Sorry, Toga, I mean you no disrespect. But your quirk practically screams bad guy. Or, girl, in your case. I mean, seriously, what would you even be called? Dracula, the Vampire Hero? And what would you even do? Suck blood from your foes?"
"I could be an undercover cop." Toga suggested. "I saw it on TV. The cops busted this wannabe yakuza gang by having a cop pretend to be a member for ten months."
"Yeah, hate to burst your bubble, kid, but cops aren't technically heroes." Dabi said.
"Don't listen to him, Toga." Twice chimed in. "You can be anything you set your mind too. You don't have a chance in hell!"
"Shut up, Twice." Shigaraki said. "Like you'd do any better as a hero."
"I would never dream of consider the possibility of being a hero!" Twice huffed. "I could surround any villain in my path with infinite doubles! Infinite against one! I would be the greatest hero ever! I don't mean that!"
"Why is this even something we are discussing?" Spinner groaned. "We are villains. Not mercenaries who sometimes choose to be good people. All of us have body counts higher than our age."
"If I may offer a solution..." Kurogiri stepped forward. "I believe there is an easy way to settle this dispute; by seeing who can preform the most charitable deeds for society within a certain timeframe."
"You're encouraging us to do charity work, tin can?" Dabi questioned. "Thought for sure you would be against anything that went against 'Villain 101'. You know, stealing candy from babies and such."
"Amusing, Dabi." Kurogiri said. "Truth be told, I'm excited that young Tomura is actually interested in an activity. This can be seen as a good team-building exercise for the league."
"I'm in." Shigaraki shrugged. "Anything to prove William Afton here wrong."
"Is that a reference from one of your shitty video games?" Dabi asked. "Whatever, I'm also in."
"Guys, you realize you are both agreeing to a challenge at who would be the better hero, right?" Spinner stressed. "This is literally the opposite of what we do."
"You're out then?" Shigaraki clarified. "You ain't curious to see what we could've been before we all sold our soul?"
"You are both crazy." Spinner chuckled. "Fine, I'll do it. But only out of spite."
"Count us in as well!" Toga beamed, shaking Twice's shoulder. "C'mon, Jin, do this with me!"
"Oh, I can't say no to you Toga." Twice sighed. "How's this? No. Consider me in!"
"I will also participate." Mr. Compress said as he emerged from the shadows.
"Where the hell were you for this debate?" Dabi asked.
"Not important." Compress shrugged. "What is important is deciding how we will appoint a winner to this game we choose to play."
"I will be the judge of that." Kurogiri volunteered. "I will assign each of you an earpiece and body camera that will allow me to judge a victor."
"Sounds fair to me." Shigaraki grinned. The rest of the league agreed as well.
"Very well." Kurogiri nodded. "Prepare yourselves with appropriate disguises and hero names. We shall begin this competition tomorrow."
"I can't believe we are doing this." Spinner said to himself.