Chapter Text
#1
He gets it.
They’re both highly physically affectionate individuals. Sungho understands that.
But… but… surely there are limits. Platonic limits.
“3… 2…” the director calls from across the set. “And act —“
“Wait,” Sungho bursts. “Waitwaitwait.”
The director eyeballs him. “What now?”
They’re inside a cafe, filming the music video for be mine. It’s cosy and smells faintly of wood and old leather. Junhyung’s sitting across from him, sprawled across his chair, looking faintly concerned at Sungho’s outburst.
Sungho leans away from the table towards the director, out of Junhyung’s hearing range. “It’s just — do we have to?” he whispers.
Junhyung laughs at him from across the table. “I can still hear you, hyung.”
Sungho scowls at him.
The lights illuminate Junhyung’s cheekbones ridiculously. Ridiculous. Junhyung’s cheekbones are ridiculous.
“Taeyeob and Kyubin didn’t have to pretend-kiss,” Sungho says indignantly.
“It’s the concept,” the director explains.
“I understand the concept,” Sungho says. “It’s just — just —“
“Hyunggg,” Junhyung interrupts, a teasing lilt to his voice. “Do I make you nervous? Is that it?”
Sungho opens his mouth to protest, but he’s so outraged that nothing comes out.
Junhyung leans across the table, cupping his chin in his hand. “You don’t have to be nervous, hyung. I’ll take care of you.”
“I — I’m not nervous,” Sungho splutters.
Junhyung covers his hands with his. “Okay,” he says. He leans in, fringe falling across his eyes. “It’ll be easy, hyung, don’t worry.”
Sungho eyes him warily.
“Just like this,” Junhyung whispers, and before Sungho can react, Junhyung’s leaning in, and Sungho’s heart leaps into his throat, and Junhyung’s hair falls into his eyes as he practically climbs over the table, and he’s so close —
“Perfect!” their director hollers. “Just like that!”
Junhyung sits back and smiles easily.
Sungho takes a sharp breath, and swallows his heart back down into his ribcage.
He realises that he’d stopped breathing.
Oxygen. He needs oxygen.
The set lights beam insufferably down at him. God, it’s hot.
Sungho meets Junhyung’s eyes. How does Junhyung look so calm?
“See?” Junhyung says. “Easy.”
Sungho gives him a doubtful look. He’s just about to retort when the door rings and opens to reveal —
“I have arrived~!” Taeyeob sings, sweeping grandly into the cafe. “What’s going on? What are we filming?”
Sungho buries his face in his hands.
“A kiss scene,” he hears Junhyung say.
“A kiss scene?!” Taeyeob repeats.
“Yeah, I need to kiss hyung.”
“Like… like on the lips?”
“Where else —“
“Okay everyone,” Sungho hears the director say, clapping his hands. “Silence on set!”
“I’m thrilled,” Taeyeob says, unhelpfully, then flounces away.
Sungho lifts his face from his hands and watches Taeyeob’s retreating back in despair.
Junhyung enters his field of vision and quirks a grin at him. “I’ll take care of you,” he mouths.
Sungho scowls.
“Sungho-sshi,” the director says. “Can you —“
“I got it,” Sungho says sharply. “I know what to do.”
He’s always wanted to be an actor, after all. This is nothing. It’s just his first acting challenge. Nothing more.
He gestures at his hands on the table. “You should hold my hands before leaning in,” he tells Junhyung. “It’s more natural that way.”
Junhyung’s mouth lifts at the corner. “Yes sir.”
Sungho makes a face.
“Okay, everyone ready?” the director calls. “3… 2… 1… action!”
Dutifully, Junhyung places his hand over Sungho’s. Sungho glances down, then back up. His heart has resumed its original position in his throat.
Junhyung leans in.
This time, Sungho’s ready for it. For the way Junhyung’s hair falls into his eyes, and the way his eyes drop to Sungho’s lips, and the way he leans across the table and right into his space.
But Sungho isn’t ready for just how far Junhyung is willing to go.
Junhyung angles his head, and Sungho’s eyes unfocus from how close he is. Junhyung doesn’t stop, just inches closer and closer, and in a fraction of that second, Sungho panic-wonders if he’d misheard the “pretend” part of “pretend-kiss”. Was this supposed to be an actual kiss?
Fuck.
Sungho squeezes his eyes closed and waits, breath caught somewhere between his lungs and his heart.
Junhyung’s breath drifts gently against his lips.
Sungho finds himself tilting his head to accommodate Junhyung, like it’s the most natural thing in the world to do.
He finds himself thinking: he wouldn’t mind.
He wouldn’t mind if Junhyung kissed him.
Sungho doesn’t know what to do with that realisation, so he just sits there, frozen in place, waiting. Time stills itself into the milliseconds that tick past, tap-tap-tap as rapid as his pulse.
But Junhyung doesn’t kiss him. He stops just short of Sungho’s lips, then drifts further down to nudge his nose gently against Sungho’s chin. He smells like fresh laundry and the shampoo they share at home. He smells like late nights watching Midnight Horror Story, and naps in the practice room, and lazy afternoons gaming at home.
Sungho doesn’t dare take another breath.
“Cut!” Sungho hears the director holler, but it sounds like it’s coming from far away, like he and Junhyung have suspended themselves into their own little time bubble, extracted from the timeline of reality.
Then Junhyung leans away, and the cold air of the night rushes back into the space left behind.
Sungho opens his eyes, and swallows.
He’s not disappointed, he tells himself. He was just curious.
“Whoaaaaaa,” Taeyeob squawks from somewhere behind Sungho. “Whattttt?”
Junhyung laughs, and a behind-the-scenes camera drifts into Sungho’s periphery, so Sungho puts on an amiable smile and tells the camera how much fun he’s having.
He casts a glance at Junhyung, and he looks just at ease.
This is work. Just work.
The next few takes pass by a little easier. Taeyeob and Kyubin, who arrives just a bit later, make a huge ruckus about the scene, and that helps Sungho compartmentalise. He compartmentalises the way Junhyung cups his elbow just so every time he leans in, and the way he smells, and the way the body heat from Junhyung’s proximity never really leaves him, even after the shoot ends.
“Good job, hyung,” Junhyung tells him afterwards in the van, as they make their way back home.
“You too,” Sungho says.
“I think we looked pretty convincing, didn’t we?” Junhyung says.
“We did,” Sungho admits. “You were so focused.”
“It’s not hard to focus.”
“No? Not with all the cameras?”
Junhyung pauses. Then he leans in and murmurs: “It’s not hard to focus on you.”
On… him…?
Sungho laughs, and his face heats, and he tries to compartmentalise the way Junhyung’s breath blows against his ear and the way his heart jumps.
Suddenly feeling bold, he turns around and leans up into Junhyung’s side, and whispers: “Same.”