Chapter Text
Year 2
Sirius sat on the corner of one of the three four poster beds in his new dorm. He hadn’t met his roommates yet and his parents hadn’t bothered to stick around and help him navigate the new room, so he was stuck sitting. Sitting and waiting. He wasn’t sure which bed was his or if the other two had already been in to unpack. Hell, he didn’t even know their names. His mother was the one with all the information and right now her and his father were across campus helping Regulus move in for his first year.
Sirius had meant to attend Hogwarts last year with all the other first years but he had gone fully blind around the end of last summer so his parents thought it best to pull him out the first year. They couldn’t bear to have a call from the school that Sirius was falling behind or that he hurt himself from not being fully adjusted to the new space. They didn’t give a fuck about his health and didn’t make his home accessable to live in, but he couldn’t argue that going to school would’ve been a terrible idea. So, he spent all of last year being homeschooled with his younger brother with the promise of Hogwarts looming over his head, something to keep him going.
Three whole months he got to be away from his family. Three months. Sirius hadn’t as much spent a full day away from them, much less months. He would return home for the winter holidays and his parents would evaluate his progress then. If Sirius wasn’t able to perform well or if he wasn’t keeping up with his school work for whatever reason, they’d pull him back out. They couldn’t have the heir of the Black household bringing their name to shame, not after already being a disappointment for being born with a disability. It wasn’t Sirius’ fault but his mother was sure to remind him what shame he brought to the family. Sirius, why can’t you be more like your brother? Sirius, stop making everything about you. Sirius, you need to learn to grow up. Sirius, I can’t keep holding your hand for everything, you’re grown up now. Sirius. Sirius. Sirius-
The door to his room flung home and multiple voices flooded the previously deadly quiet space. Sirius suddenly sat up straight and pulled both his hands onto his lap, biting down on his lower lip.
“Who’re you?” One of the boys asked, the other punching him in the shoulder, receiving a grunt in response.
“He’s our new roommate, James. Don’t be a numpty.”
“Oh! I completely forgot we were getting a new roommate! I’m James Potter and this is Remus Lupin.” There was an awkward pause and Sirius had a feeling there was a hand in front of his body. He didn’t want to make a fool of himself and guess wrong, so instead he cleared his throat awkwardly and pushed himself up off the edge of the bed.
“Sirius Black.” He responded, suddenly feeling quite ill. Perhaps he should’ve stayed home. Perhaps his mother was right in telling him he was a failure, that he wouldn’t be able to make it out in the real world. Perhaps he should call them and beg them to turn around and–
“That’s an odd name, though I suppose not as odd as Wolf John Wolf over here. I’m feeling a bit left out with my boring old name now. Should ring Mum and Dad up, let them know we gotta make some changes on my birth certificate.” James said, talking a hundred miles a minute.
“Please ignore him, James gets far too excited on move-in weekend, should’ve seen him last year when we found out it’d just be the two of us and we’d have a spare bed. He spent at least thirty straight minutes telling me all the ways we could transform the free space into a hangout area, as if this tiny dorm room could handle that.” Remus chuckled and Sirius felt a body near his, though not close enough to touch. Remus sat himself down on the edge of the bed Sirius had previously been sitting on, pulling off his shoes and letting them hit the floor with a small thud. “Hey, why were you on my bed? Sorry if you don’t like yours, suppose we could trade, but I like the bed by the window and we already chose these last year.”
“Oh!” Sirius slowly took a few steps backwards, too hesitate to do anything else. He hadn’t had the time to properly explore the room and map out where all the tripping hazards would be. He wasn’t even confident all his belongings had been brought up for him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realise it was yours.” There was another silence in the room, Sirius bringing up a hand to awkwardly rub at the back of his neck. “I’m blind and no one really gave me a tour of anything and my parents left so I just sat down. I didn’t want to end up tripping over anything and I figured one of you would be back in soon enough.”
Sirius waited for their reaction, assuming it would be dramatic just given by how much energy he was greeted with in the first three minutes of knowing each other. He held his breath for the questions, for the ‘but you don’t look blind!’, for the pity, but he didn’t get that. Instead he got a pat to his shoulder from who he assumed was James.
“Oh! S’no problem, mate! We can help you and we can move things around so it’s easier to navigate the room, if you want. Remus has the bed by the window, I have the bed across from him, and you have the bed next to him. Your bed is actually closest to the bathroom, so you kind of lucked out with that.”
“Oh!” Sirius felt a smile tug on his lips as James gently turned his body and walked him over to the spare bed that was next to Remus’. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after.
*
It was only a week into school and Sirius was positively on the verge of a breakdown. The campus was much larger than he had expected and even after having spent his first full day being led around by Remus and James, he still couldn’t make sense of the layout. There were stairs upon stairs upon stairs which normally wouldn’t be a problem if it weren’t for the fact he couldn’t figure out which staircase led to which hall for his classes.
He was about one more missed room away from calling it quits and going back to the dorm when he felt a gentle touch to his shoulder. He hadn’t known James and Remus long at all, but he was already able to recognize their touches. James had a rough grab and he was very loud all the time. He usually would call Sirius’ name and then leap forward to touch his arm or grab his shoulder before falling into a dramatic retelling of a story or asking Sirius the first question that popped into his mind. Sirius got scared at first by the sudden movements, but even after only being here a week he was getting used to it. He really liked James and all his energy. It was a drastic change from the Black household but a very welcome change at that.
James was funny, caring, loud, and passionate. He made Sirius laugh harder than anyone else and always made sure he felt comfortable in new rooms. He walked Sirius to his classes the very first day of school and even explained he’d probably be able to get a pass to walk Sirius to all of his classes on all the other days if he really wanted. Sirius declined the help for now, wanting to hold on to whatever independence he had. He really liked James. James felt like the brother he never had. Well, he did have a brother but Regulus wasn’t the same as James. Regulus was quiet and a rule follower, never raising his voice. He cared for Sirius but James cared in a different way.
Then there was Remus. Sirius also really liked Remus, even though he was far softer spoken and not around as much. Sirius wasn’t sure where he went off to during the days, but he supposed it was none of his business. Remus was just as funny as James, though he wasn’t as loud. He didn’t crack jokes all the time but when he did, he had the whole room in a fit of giggles. Remus helped Sirius out just as much as James did, offering to help hold his things when Sirius was walking around with his cane and always telling him everything that was on the food list for the day so that Sirius wouldn’t end up grabbing something he didn’t like. Remus didn’t feel quite like a brother in the way James did. He felt…different. Special. Remus was special.
The hand on his shoulder was Remus’ which Sirius guessed before Remus even opened his mouth to speak.
“Are you lost?” Remus dropped his hand from Sirius’ shoulder now that he got his attention and stood in front of him, gently pulling Sirius away from the traffic in the school halls.
Remus was an inch or two taller than him and always wore soft sweaters when he wasn’t in his uniform. He smelt of a mix of vanilla and cocoa from his body soap and the candles he always burned in their room, something Sirius had grown to love.
“Mmm…I think?” Sirius sighed and brought up the heels of his hands to rub into his eyes. “I just got out of maths and was meant to go to history but I think I’m at the wrong staircase. This bloody campus is so confusing.”
“Yeah, it really is and I’m not even blind.” Remus paused for a moment with a grimace. “Sorry, shouldn’t have said that.”
“That’s okay, you’re allowed to say that. Slightly reassuring that this is also difficult for a sighted person to navigate.”
“Do you want me to help you to class? I’m heading towards that way anyway.”
“Would you?”
“Mhm!” Remus gently nudged Sirius in the side with his elbow, an indication for Sirius to grab onto his arm. “Follow me.” Remus gave Sirius a smile and, although Sirius couldn’t see it, he felt it all the same.
*
Sirius was walking near their shared bookshelves in the dorm room, his hand gently reaching out to touch the various items on the shelf. James had a lot of knick knacks from all his traveling he did growing up and Remus had enough books to keep him entertained until the day he died. Sirius missed reading, even though his options were always limited. His parents banned most things in the house, not wanting to expose their kids to any impure media. Sirius had hoped he’d get to explore more of those banned titles when he went off to school but alas his body had other plans for him.
“What’s this?” Sirius ran his hand across a row of neatly placed items. They felt like books though much thinner.
“Those are my records.” Remus looked up from where he was reading on his bed, his gaze following where Sirius’ hands were touching. “You can put one on if you want, we have a record player on the table to the left of the shelf.
“Hm.” Sirius nodded, wishing desperately to be able to see the art on all the records, to read the song lists, to read the musician statements. He had a deep love for music, though that love was limited as well. He grew up playing many instruments and listening to classical music but his heart felt close to exploding with joy the first time his cousin Andromeda had played him some of her favorite music. “Will you put your favorite on?”
“Yeah!” Remus dog-eared the page he was on and pushed himself off of his bed, padding his way over to the shelf next to Sirius. He let his fingers trace along the titles, searching for an album in particular.
“Have you heard of The Strokes?”
“No, don’t think so. I wasn’t really allowed to listen to a lot of music growing up.”
“Oh.” Remus grabbed for the album and pulled it off the shelf, turning to make his way to the record player. “You’ll love this. We’ll start with their first album, though my favorite is their third one. A lot of people say First Impressions Of Earth isn’t their best work but it’s really something special. I swear my life has changed ever since hearing it. I have three of their vinyls, so we can listen through them all! I mean…if uh…you want.”
Sirius had never heard Remus speak so passionately about something before, his normal soft voice suddenly perky and excited. How could Sirius say no to that?
“Yeah! Let’s listen!”
Remus set up the record while Sirius stood near, scared to touch anything in case he ruined the player. They had a record player in the Black household but his mother would chop his hand off if he ever tried to touch it.
The opening of the first song began, the drums filling the room followed by the singer's scratchy voice. Andromeda liked music like this, he’d be sure to let her know about them the next time he saw her.
“Do you want to lie down?”
“What?”
“I discovered that it’s sometimes fun to listen to new music while laying on the floor. I realise it’s a bit silly saying it out loud now but…”
“No, let’s do it.” Sirius gave Remus a smile and carefully lowered himself to the hardwood floor. He was sure they did look a bit silly, but no one else was around to judge. James was out trying out for the rugby team and Remus made it very clear he’d rather drop dead than try an attempt at rugby. Obviously Sirius couldn’t play, which is how they found themselves both alone in the room.
“Oh! This is my favorite song off the album!” Remus spoke up after a few songs.
I didn't take no shortcuts
I spent the money that I saved up
Oh, mama running out of luck
But like my sister, don't give a fuck
“I’m not entirely sure what this song is singing about, think about some fucked up relationship but I really like it. It’s fun and has such a classic Strokes sound.” Remus smiled to himself while Sirius nodded, tapping his fingers against his chest to the beat.
“I like it! I haven’t ever heard something like this before. Is this your favorite band?”
“Mmm..I think. I also really like Sufjan Stevens, though my mum says I’m far too young to be listening to sad music like that. I don’t really find it sad just…insightful, ya know?”
“I guess so. I haven’t heard any of their music either.”
“What! What did you grow up listening to?” Remus rolled onto his side so he was facing Sirius, who was on his back facing up at the ceiling with his eyes closed.
“Didn’t really listen to music growing up. My mother didn’t like the noise. She preferred a quiet house.”
“Oh.” Remus bit his lower lip and let out a sigh. “Well, I don’t like a quiet house so I’ll show you all the best music, yeah?”
Sirius tilted his head to the side with a smile, nodding to the boy next to him. “Yeah.”
*
Classes weren’t as bad as Sirius had thought they would be. He was allowed to bring a laptop to type the verbal notes they got and always had someone with him to take the notes that weren’t verbalized. He lucked out that he had most of his classes with either James or Remus, so they helped quite a lot. The class without them he was getting help from a girl named Lily, who was in his Latin class with him. He hadn’t wanted to take Latin but his mother told him he’d be lazy if he signed up for French since he was already fluent, so Latin it was.
Right now he was sat in his geography lecture next to James, who was typing out all his notes for him. Sirius was resting his chin on his open palm, his elbow against the desk. His eyes shut tiredly as he listened to the teacher ramble on about god knows what.
“Alright, I want you to pair up and answer the five questions you see here on the whiteboard. Write down your answers and then we will go over it together as a class.” Professor Sprout announced, her heels clicking against the tiled floor as she made her way back to what Sirius assumed was her desk.
James adjusted his seat so he could face Sirius better, moving their supplies around so they’d have enough space to write things out. “Alright, I can read the questions then we can come up with the answer together?”
“Yeah, sounds great, though I do have to admit I wasn’t fully paying attention to the last fifteen minutes. Sprout is super nice but she doesn’t have the most fascinating voice.” Sirius sat up in his seat with a yawn, rubbing at his eyes.
“If I wasn’t taking notes for you I would a hundred percent be asleep right now. Win win for both of us I suppose.”
“Ha, suppose so.”
James gave him a gentle smile in response and began to read the questions.
About fifteen minutes later the class was all mostly complete, Sprout announcing that they’d be going around the room to share all their answers. Things went fine until it was time for James and Sirius to speak. James cleared his throat to read out their answer for number one but was rudely interrupted the moment the first word left his mouth.
“Miss, it’s not fair that they get a computer. They’re clearly cheating by looking up the answers.” Sirius recognized that voice as Severus Snape, who had slowly become his nemesis at this school from the few short weeks they had been here. He had gone out of his way to put the spotlight on Sirius at any given moment and decided that he, James, and Remus were going to be his target for bullying. Sirius wasn’t exactly sure what they had done to deserve such love, but he wasn’t going to let Snape win.
“We’re not cheating, Snivellus.” James spat back, Sirius snickering at the nickname.
“Well then you don’t need your computer then, hm? It’s an unfair advantage when the rest of us have to write out our notes and rely solely on the textbook.”
Unfair advantage, my arse. Sirius felt his cheeks heating up, figuring people had turned to look at him now that Snape had officially brought the spotlight to them.
“Go on, if you’re not cheating, put the laptop away then.” Snape continued, both Sirius and James shifting uncomfortably in their seats. Sirius could tell James wanted to say something, but they were luckily cut off by the professor.
“Mr. Snape, that is enough out of you. It is none of your business what other students are using in my class, that is between them and I. If you have issues you may talk to me after class, but for now let’s please get back to the subject at hand.” She cleared her throat and skipped right over Sirius and James’ group, continuing right on to the next as if nothing had happened.
James nudged Sirius in the side with his elbow, leaning in close. “You okay?”
“Yeah, s’just embarrassing. We weren’t doing anything wrong.”
“I know, mate. We’ll get him back, don’t worry.”
*
If there was one thing about James Potter that the whole school knew, and slightly feared, was that he loved pranks and he was quite good at them too. Since the start of this year they had already managed to fill the girls' loos with bubbles and also super glue the Slytherin building door knob shut so no one could get in. They had all been harmless, but James was positively seething with rage right now.
“I just don’t understand how he gets away with saying all those stupid comments, knowing damn well that you’re blind. He’s just trying to get a rise out of us.”
“Well, consider it working.” Sirius motioned in James’ general direction. “He’s the worst, yeah, but what am I meant to do about it? I can’t bloody see, James. I don’t exactly want to get in a prank war with someone who clearly has higher ups in this school and most likely has access to things that could put me in vulnerable situations. I don’t know my way around the school well enough if something were to happen and mum won’t let me get a phone until my 14th birthday.”
“Don’t worry, you won’t be in any danger. I’ll do the prank, you and Remus can just stand guard.”
“What!” Remus perked up when he heard his name, crossing his arms over his chest. “I don’t want to be involved, James, not after the last prank where they caught me with the soap literally in my hand and I got detention for two straight weeks. Mum was most definitely not happy getting that letter home.”
“Remusss, c’mon. It’ll be fine, I’ll come up with something foolproof, don’t even worry about it.” James Potter’s famous last words. Normally when he told them not to worry about something, it gave them even more reason to worry.
“Fine.” Remus said after a moment with a small huff. Sirius heard shuffling around the edges of the great hall, followed by the sounds of people standing up. “C’mon, food just got put out.”
All three boys stood up and walked to the side of the room where the tables of food were laid out, Sirius having abandoned his cane in exchange for just holding on to Remus’ arm. He found it easier to navigate this way when he was surrounded by so many other people. The great hall was massive from what he was able to tell, all the students having meal times at the same time. The system they had worked well but Sirius was still overwhelmed by the amounts of people all crowding in the same place.
Remus reached forward for a plate, handing one over to Sirius, James following after. “Alright they’re serving shepherd's pie for the main dish and then there’s sides of green beans and roasted brussels. For dessert it looks like there’s shortbread cookies and…” Remus paused, leaning past someone to get a good view. “A few bowls of various cut up fruits.”
“Mm! I was wondering when we’d have shepherd's pie again, it’s my favorite.” Sirius smiled, Remus carefully guiding him over to where the dishes were so Sirius could scoop himself the portions he wanted.
All three boys got the food they wanted and then made their way back to where they normally sat, Remus and Sirius next to each other and James across from them. Recently Lily, Marlene, and Mary had been sitting with them as well, but all three girls were missing tonight.
Sirius ate silently while James brainstormed his prank ideas out loud, Remus humming along in agreement every now and again.
Sirius was nearly finished with his dinner when there was a hand placed on his shoulder. Regulus. Sirius flipped around on the bench he was sitting on, Regulus standing awkwardly in front.
“What do you want?” Sirius and Regulus had been close before Sirius fully lost his sight, but the last year really tore them apart. Their mother and father had gotten more intense with their parenting and Regulus was ever so slowly beginning to follow along with all their insane orders. He didn’t stand up for himself and barely thanked Sirius for all the blows he took for him. Sirius had this dream that they’d rekindle their relationship once they were away from their parents, but things just got worse. Regulus was in Slytherin, the dorm tower across campus, and Sirius was in Gryffindor. Slytherin and Gryffindor had a history of being enemies, though Sirius thought the whole thing was a bit silly. They were randomly sorted into houses, it wasn’t based on anything. All of the Blacks had been in Slytherin though, Sirius was the first to break the tradition.
“I just wanted to see how you were doing.” Regulus’ voice was soft, barely audible over the other many voices in the dining hall.
“Clearly I’m fine.”
“I know…I…I heard what happened with Snape. He’s a right prick to say that sort of stuff.”
“Oh as if you aren’t aquintances with him and all his awful friends.”
“Sirius, please. I’m trying. It’s not my fault I was sorted in a different house and…and I just want…” Regulus paused, letting out a defeated sigh.
“Want what?”
“Forget it. Have a good dinner.” And with that he flipped around on his feet, ducking his head and rushing back to where his friends sat at the table across the hall.
“Was that your brother?” James asked, Sirius slowly turning back around, no longer hungry for dessert. He dropped his fork on his plate and shoved it away from himself with a small groan.
“Yup. Regulus, perfect son and most loved by our parents.”
“I didn’t know you had a brother.” Remus mumbled.
“Yeah, we uh…it’s complicated. We used to be close but things just got bad last year. Mother wasn’t supportive with the change in my health and Regulus never stood up for me. He’d go along with the ridiculous things they said and did to me. I know he’s a kid, I am too but…I just thought things would get better once we got here, that we’d grow close again. Suppose I was wrong though.”
“I mean, he was only checking in on you. I hardly think that’s a bad–”
Sirius cut Remus off quickly, reaching forward to grab for his water cup. “I don’t wanna talk about this, yeah? Let’s just go back to prank planning.”
Remus didn’t attempt to bring it up again, James and Sirius seemingly perfectly content to go back to talking about all the ways they could get back at Snape.
*
Sirius rolled around in his bed, kicking his legs out with a hard thump, the sheets tangled around his body. He was returning home tomorrow for the holiday break and every part of him wished he could just stay here. Realistically it wouldn’t be smart, as all his friends and most of campus would be away, but Sirius didn’t want to go back to his mother and father. He’d have Regulus to keep him company but he feared they had grown too far apart the last few months at school that it’d never be the same at home.
He let out a small groan and rolled back around one more time before an annoyed voice filled the room.
“Sirius, I swear to god if you don’t stop rolling around I’m going to lock you out and make you sleep on the couch in the common room.” Remus grumbled from his bed, ripping his curtains open. There were soft footsteps across the floor and then suddenly Sirius’ curtains were being pulled apart as well.
“Good evening.” Sirius smiled over at Remus and could tell he was getting an annoyed look in return.
“It’s 3am, why are you still up?”
“I can’t sleep.”
“Clearly.”
“I’m just worried about going home tomorrow.” There was a long pause, neither boy saying anything. Sirius had told James and Remus a little about his homelife but he had left out some of the more gruesome details about the abuse he went through. How his parents would take away meals as punishments for acting out, how they’d take away his cane if he mouthed off to them, how they’d slap him across the cheek if he dared express a thought that didn’t match theirs. The thought made a shiver shoot down Sirius’ spine.
“Budge up.” Remus whispered and Sirius complied happily, scooting over to the edge of the bed so Remus could climb in next to him. “Do you wanna talk about it?”
“No…there’s nothing to talk about. I’m just really happy here and my home life isn’t great. Wish I could stay.”
“Yeah…hey, maybe you could come round mine for the holidays? Mum wouldn’t mind at all and she’d be able to convince my dad it was fine. He’s kind of the worst but he eases up when my mum’s around.”
“That’s nice but I really can’t, my parents would never allow it. Besides, who else is supposed to bother Regulsu all holiday, ya know? That’s what big brothers are for.” Sirius attempted the joke but it came out pathetically.
“Well…you can call me, yeah? We can email too, since you don’t have a phone.”
“Yeah, that’d be nice. My mother doesn’t let me use the computer a lot, only for academic purposes so I’ll try and email as much as I can, but I doubt it’ll be a lot. Remind me tomorrow to give you my house number though.”
“Okay.” Remus whispered, adjusting his body on the bed so he was on his side, facing Sirius. Sirius mirrored the movement and rotated so he was facing Remus as well, never having wanted so badly to be able to see the way someone looked. He knew what his family looked like, had a clear image of his brother in his head, but he didn’t know a single face at Hogwarts.
“Can I touch your face?” The words came out before Sirius had a chance to think twice about it.
“What?” Remus let out a startled, awkward laugh though quickly covered his mouth in an attempt to not wake James up, even though he was an incredibly heavy sleeper.
“It’s…well…you’ve told me what you look like but I can’t quite picture it. I rely fully on touches and verbal descriptions and find I can imagine people better if I can feel the way they look. Sorry, I know that’s absurd and a complete violation of your boundaries, I shouldn’t–” Sirius was cut off by a hand gently grabbing his own. Remus slowly brought his hand up to his cheek, giving silent permission to touch him.
“I’m not anything special.”
Sirius let his fingers gently trail across Remus’ cheek, his skin much softer than he was expecting. Where he expected rough patches and maybe even stubble was instead soft skin and peach fuzz. He trailed his fingers to the side, gently running over his lips which were chapped and clearly chewed on. He moved up to his nose, which was bigger than he had expected and had a large indent across the bridge.
“What’s this?” Sirius moved his fingers across the scar, which went all the way across the bridge of Remus’ nose on both sides.
“Scar.”
Sirius moved his fingers up his bridge until he got to the middle of his eyebrows, moving to the right to rub his thumb across his brow, once again stopping at another indent. This scar sliced down his eyebrow and went right to the corner of his eye.
“Another scar?” Sirius whispered, bringing his finger down until he reached Remus’ cheek again. He rested it there for a moment before dropping his hand away.
“Yeah, I have quite a few on my face. I don’t want to talk about them though.”
“That’s okay.” Sirius was silent for a while, taking in the new information he had just discovered. He knew Remus had hazel eyes, olive skin, and freckles and now he had a better idea of what his physical features were like. He did his best to mash it all up together in his mind to create the man laying across from him.
“Hey Rem?”
“Hm?”
“I think you’re special.”
*
The rest of the school year went as well as Sirius would have hoped. He figured out the layout of the campus and he managed to not be late to any of the classes. He, James, and Remus managed to plan and execute quite a few pranks to Slytherin, thus deeming themselves The Marauders. Sirius was in more detention than he ever thought possible but he was also happier than he ever thought possible. His parents were absolutely disgusted with his behavior and he feared being trapped back home for three months, but at least he was able to bring home good grades. After all, that’s all they really wanted for him and the family name.
Their dorm room was all packed and ready to go, James already outside saying hello to his parents and Remus throwing in the last few items into his trunk.
“You promise you’ll be okay this summer?”
“Mhm, probably just be bored, really. We aren’t allowed to watch TV, I can’t read, and they won’t allow free access to my computer so I really will just be stuck doing nothing. Gonna bother Reggie and call him ableist if he refuses to hang out.”
Remus let out a laugh as he slammed his trunk shut with a small click of the latch. “Well that’s one way to form healthy and happy relationships with your siblings.” Remus shuffled around the room, making his way over to where Sirius was sitting on his bed. “I made you something.”
“What!” Sirius perked his body up, a huge grin on his face. He moved his body over so Remus would have more room to sit.
“Mhm. It’s not a lot but uh…” Remus placed a thin plastic square item in Sirius' palm before continuing. “I made you a CD, since you don’t have a phone. You can just keep this in your computer so no one will find it and…and then you’ll still be able to listen to music this summer. Marlene is in a music club so she helped me make it. I know it’s a little silly, I just thought–”
Sirius tossed the CD onto the bed next to him and launched his body forward to throw his arms around Remus’ neck. Vanilla and cocoa. He’d miss that scent. He’d miss Remus. And James and school and his whole new life here, but he’d especially miss Remus.
“I love it, thank you. I can’t wait to listen and judge you for all your sad music.” Sirius pulled back a moment later, his cheeks slowly filling with a pink blush. “Does it say anything?”
“Mhm.” Remus’ voice was softer than it had been before and Sirius couldn’t tell if it was from nervousness or fondness. “The CD case is blank but on the actual disk I wrote Remus’ Guide To Brilliant Music. James drew a few smiley faces as well and I think he attempted to draw the three of us as stick figures, but it looks proper rubbish.”
“Thank you, this is amazing, really. No one has ever made me a gift before.”
“Ever?”
“No…I mean…I’ve gotten gifts for my birthdays and such but it’s never been homemade like this. Definitely never been as thoughtful. I really love it and I’m going to listen to it whenever I can. Thank you.”
“Of course.” Remus gave him a smile before pushing his body up off the bed. He reached down to gently grab onto Sirius’ hand. “Now c’mon, we gotta get everything downstairs before James comes back up here and calls us lazy.”
“Yeah, alright.” Sirius took Remus’ hand, not able to resist giving it a small squeeze before they pulled apart and continued to move out.
*
From: Remus Lupin
To: Sirius Black
Subject: Summer yay!
Hey Sirius! I hope you’re surviving okay with your family. How has Operation Annoy Reggie been going? I haven’t heard from you since we left school, so I’m assuming he hasn’t tried to kill you yet …. Or maybe he HAS killed you and that’s why I haven’t heard from you? Uh oh. No, really, I hope summer has treated you okay so far.
It’s been alright back home, nothing incredibly exciting to do in Wales. Mum is obsessed with gardening so I’ve been helping her, though I really don’t love it. I can’t find the joy in sitting out in the hot sun all day while kneeling in a pile of dirt just to plant things that’ll take weeks to grow. Maybe I’m missing something. It makes her happy though, so here I am. Where’s my Son of The Year award?
Have you listened to the CD yet? I heard the Strokes are planning on releasing a new album soon, though after Angles I’m a little hesitant. We can listen to the new album together when we’re back at school.
Message me when you can!
From: James Potter
To: Sirius Black
Subject: I MISS YOU!!
SIRIUS!!! Hi how are you! I miss you so much! I was telling Mum all about you and how you’re stuck at home all summer and she said you can come visit whenever you want! We’re meant to be going on holiday towards the end of July but that’s ages away. I’m sure you could even come on holiday if you really wanted!
How have you been? Haven’t heard anything from you, though I know you said that would probably happen!
I’ve been thinking of a lot of things we could do to Slytherins this year, I can’t wait to tell you and Remus all about it!
Write back soon!!! BYE!!!
From : Remus Lupin
To : Sirius Black
Subject : Did you know ants can lift and carry 50x their weight?
Bug facts, yay! Mum was telling me about ants earlier today, not sure where she got her information but I’ll just take her word for it.
How are you? Can’t believe it’s already the end of July. It’s so bloody hot here, I was not made for this. I can’t wait to be back at school where I can get away with wearing sweaters nearly all year. At least I’ll be returning to school with a cool (or very tacky) tan.
I’ve been thinking about you a lot! Found a song I think you’d like, it’s called “I Just Sighed. I Just Sighed, Just So You Know” by Los Campesinos!. Not everyone’s cup of tea but I think they’re brilliant, I’ll have to listen to more of their stuff when I have the time.
Message when you can! :)
From : James Potter
To : Sirius Black
Subject: ok i'm officially bored
Listen, I know I was a lot as a kid BUT WHY DIDNT MUM OR DAD HAVE ANOTHER KID!!!!! I NEED A FRIEND!!!! Ugh! Mum says I'm a miracle baby or something and I’m all they ever wanted but oh my GOD IM BORED! I’ve been hanging out with my neighbor, but she’s two years younger so she’s not all that fun to hang out with. My other neighbor is 5 years older and he doesn’t like to hang out with me, says I’m too much of a kid. Excuse ME I am thirteen, I’m nearly an adult!
Anyway, I leave for holiday tomorrow and probably won’t have service to email! I hope you’re doing okay, can’t wait to see you in September! One more month!
From: Sirius Black
To: Remus Lupin
Subject: hi sorry im alive
Hey Remus, thanks for that fun bug fact, I told Reggie and he told me to piss off because he doesn’t care :) <3 Operation Annoy Reggie is working!!!!
Sorry I haven’t been able to email, I haven’t had my computer all summer. Mum was pissed at me for all the detentions and the family disappointment blah blah that I’ve only just gotten access to it. I probably won’t have it for long, so don’t expect any more replies from me.
I just listened to your CD and WOW you are one sad motherfucker, Remus Lupin. I really like Romulus by Sufjan Stevens. It reminds me of all my family bs! And also reminds me of you because of Romulus and Remus (sorry if that’s weird ha…just miss you and James a lot.)
Hope the gardening has been going well, see you soon.
From: Sirius Black
To: James Potter
Subject: I’ll be your brother
Jamesss! If I could, I'd come over and hang out with you all summer. Mum and dad would kill me though, I gotta stay here.
Summer has been an absolute bore for me too, if it makes you feel better, AND I have a brother. They don’t always make things better. We’ve been hanging out but I can tell he’s annoyed with me. I’m not fun to do anything with, ya know? Can’t play board games that easily, can’t sit in the library and read with him, can’t really do anything. I suggested we go exploring like we used to, but he doesn’t like to do that anymore either. UGH!
Good luck on the family holiday, I’ll see you soon!