Work Text:
༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙ ⊹ ⊹༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙
There are a couple of things Minho knows for sure in life: cats are the best creatures in existence, food tastes better when you eat it with someone, and he is in love with Han Jisung.
These are all very easily verifiable facts when your name is Lee Minho, because he’s been living the evidence of all three almost every day. Firstly, his cats always make his days brighter, as well as the strays around the city do. They understand him and he understands them better than he understands people.
Secondly, Minho simply enjoys cooking and eating more when he knows he’ll be enjoying the meal with someone else. Especially Jisung, his best friend and also roommate—because why wouldn’t they want to split the rent and live together?—who always eats his food so deliciously. They both have stable jobs, but they like living together since it saves them both boredom, effort, and money, and frankly, they’re each other’s favorite people.
Which brings us to the last point, the one where Minho is in love with Jisung. He knows this because he has been in love with him for quite some time. It’s a curse and a blessing, really, because Jisung is already his favorite person and best friend, but that makes it all the more difficult to guess if he even remotely feels the same as Minho does.
They kiss each other on the cheek all the time, because come on, Jisung has the world’s best cheeks. Minho would be crazy not to kiss them. And Jisung kisses his cheeks as well, but he’s the type of person who does that to all of his friends.
(So is Minho, but he’s way less fond when he does it with others, and he also does it way less frequently with them. It’s not quite subtle, but Jisung doesn’t seem to know about his feelings. Minho would like to keep it that way for now.)
They go out whenever they have time, too, trying out restaurants because Minho doesn’t have the energy to cook every night, despite working from home. They go on walks together, despite Minho having to drag him outside every once in a while. These are all normal things to do with your friends, Minho thinks.
What they don’t do, however, is jerk each other off.
And yet, Minho finds himself kneeled on an unfamiliar bed in front of Jisung, with his hand in his friend’s underwear, trying to ignore the way his heart is about to jump right out of his chest while Jisung pants in his hot ear. He might have made a big mistake, but he reminds himself that he’s doing this for Jisung.
The only thing he has to do is keep his feelings under control, keep things impersonal. Easy, right?
Right?
༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙ ⊹ ⊹༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙
“You need to take a break, Jisung-ah,” Minho announces as he dumps a plate of reheated food in front of his friend. Jisung had to work late, again, which caused him to wait even longer so that he could go home outside of rush hour. He called Minho in advance to let him know, but Minho was already making dinner by then.
When he got home, he looked stressed and tired, and Minho hates nothing more than seeing him like that. And now, Jisung is simply looking at him with dull eyes, exhausted and quiet, not even having the energy to respond.
“You’ve been coming home looking like shit. This stupid office job is stressing you out and you don’t even like it. And I’m done seeing you like that, so we’re going on a road trip,” he continues, and Jisung’s eyes finally gain some life as they grow wide. “Yep, I've been planning this for a while, so you better take time off and come relax with me.”
“Hyung, but… Are you able to get time off?” Jisung asks softly and Minho nods, waving his hand and telling him not to worry about it. Jisung gapes at him and opens and closes his mouth a couple of times before speaking. “I… I think I'll be able to get two weeks off. Why didn't you tell me, though? I could have helped you plan the trip.”
“I didn’t want you to have more on your plate, and I get bored during my breaks, so don't sweat it.” Minho shrugs and digs in, motioning Jisung to do so as well. He would do anything for Jisung, but seeking out a relaxing route to bring Jisung on is nothing stressful. They've been on little weekend trips more often, as well as the occasional longer vacation.
“Okay. I appreciate it, hyung-ah. I… I think I need it, too. I'm exhausted,” Jisung admits as he stabs his chopsticks into his food. He gives Minho a half-hearted smile before he looks down again, and Minho’s stomach churns in worry for him.
“Exactly. You can think about quitting while we're at it, too. But all in due time. First, let's eat.” Jisung snickers at his words and nods. Soon enough, they return to their usual banter, telling each other about their day or other things, but in the back of his mind, Minho still worries a little bit about Jisung. He hopes that this road trip will help.
Two weeks or so later, everything has been planned and prepared—more than either of them would usually plan something like this, but Minho wants Jisung to relax, so they made sure that every place they’ll stay at has been booked.
Minho is awake and ready, but Jisung hasn't shown up yet, so Minho decides to sneak into his best friend's room to see what he's up to. Jisung is still fast asleep, his cheek squished against his pillow as he hugs the comforter around him like a cocoon.
Minho softens and watches him sleep for a moment. He'd hate to wake him up when he's sleeping so soundly, because he probably needs the rest, but it would be good to get going soon, so he approaches Jisung and leans down.
He is tempted to place a big fat smooch onto his cheek, but instead, he slowly pushes his nose into the swell of his cheek and whispers, “Rise and shine, sleepyhead.”
Jisung stirs and blinks his eyes open, turning his head to squish Minho’s face, but instead he just drags his nose against Minho’s lips, almost brushing their lips together. Minho pulls back and hopes that Jisung doesn’t notice his red ears.
Minho takes a moment to calm his heart before he sets up his exasperated expression and leans closer again.
“Get up, you punk,” he says as he pats Jisung’s bed-head. Jisung groans and stretches his arms above his head before tucking himself in more, mumbling something that sounds like ‘cold’. “You can sleep more in the car, ‘Sungie. And my presence will warm you up, of course.”
Jisung snorts and finally throws the comforter off of him. “Fine, hyung. I’m getting up. I’m coming.” He holds out his hand and Minho pulls him out of bed before landing a good slap on his butt. Jisung yelps and half-heartedly glares at him, but Minho just laughs and leaves Jisung to it.
“Are your cats with your parents already? Have you had breakfast?” Jisung asks when he comes out of his room with his suitcase, eyes still small from sleep and hair still messy. He looks adorable, it’s kind of unfair. (And Minho should definitely be used to this sight already.)
“Yeah, they came to pick them up just a couple of minutes ago. And yes, I did. Here’s yours,” Minho says as he hands him the box of leftover dinner from last night. Jisung smiles and takes it before looking at Minho with a deep and exaggerated sigh.
“God, I love you so much,” he says with a shake of his head, and Minho snorts, but his heart flutters unbeknownst to the speaker of the words. Jisung says these words so easily, yet every time, Minho’s body reacts. He thinks he should be immune to the words by now, but it never seems to get old.
“I know you love my cooking. Now, let’s go.”
They load the car and get ready to go, Jisung in the passenger’s seat with the route on his phone while Minho drives. Jisung also munches on his breakfast in the meantime, his nose buried behind his scarf, so it’s quiet for the first hour, but it’s nice.
Jisung puts on some music and bops to it, but after a while he stops, and when Minho glances to the side, he sees Jisung frowning at his phone, but he isn’t telling Minho that he’s driving the wrong way or anything.
“Everything alright?” he asks, and Jisung flinches slightly—Not a good sign. He hums something indecipherable and Minho lets out a sigh. “You better not be looking at work texts right now, I swear, Han Jisung.”
“I—I’m not. I mean, they’re just wishing me good luck on the road trip, but, uhm…” Jisung trails off, his breath hitching in that distinctive way it does when he’s getting worked up or stressed. “They were talking about the things I left them with. But—”
“Ignore it. You let them know you were going to take time off in advance, so it’s not your responsibility what they’re doing now,” Minho interrupts him. There’s a little more bite to his voice than he intends it to have, but he needs Jisung to stop paying attention to his work chat. “No work thinking or chatting these two weeks, okay?”
“Yeah, I’m sorry,” Jisung answers softly, and he closes his phone. Minho feels a little bad for him, so he briefly reaches over to touch Jisung’s shoulder and rubs his thumb along it in a silent apology. “I’m trying not to be stressed and ruin this for you, hyung. I really appreciate what you’re doing for me, though, I really do. And I wanna have fun, I just—I don’t know if I can shake it all off so quickly.”
“Of course. I get it. I know the feeling of your mind lingering on an assignment even after finishing it,” he replies softly. He wishes he could just snap his fingers and make Jisung’s stress disappear, but it’s not that easy. “Try not to think too much about it, okay?”
Minho can try and accelerate the process of relaxation, even if it’s not easy. Their first stop is a small town in just about the middle of nowhere, where there’s nothing to remind them of anything related to work. He chose this place because he knows that Jisung likes the quiet, but also because it’s the perfect place for walks and visiting local bakeries and restaurants, like they always do at home as well.
Most of the time, it’s nice and they’re happy—Jisung is laughing and joking around and everything is as easy as it always is. At those moments, Minho feels happiest, too. Moments when Jisung is okay with improvising plans, being adventurous, and his beautiful heart-shaped smile is on display. He doesn’t complain about the cold and happily holds Minho’s gloved hand as they walk.
At those moments, he’s himself, the Jisung who makes Minho’s heart flutter like crazy, hammer like it’s about to jump out of his chest and into Jisung’s hands, making a bloody but perhaps also romantic scene, if not a heartbreaking one. He’s sure that Jisung would treat his heart gently, and that he would be kind no matter what, but he’s afraid that Jisung will once again put Minho’s feelings above his own, perhaps hurting himself in the process.
Minho makes sure that his heart doesn’t leave the safe haven behind his ribcage, though, and it’s not that hard, because he has been practicing the safe-keeping of his heart for years. He’s not even paying attention to it anymore by now, and he has learned to simply enjoy Jisung’s happy smiles and bright personality in those moments.
At the end of most days during this getaway, however, Minho has to see him struggle. Jisung grows quiet and Minho spots him taking deep breaths, or he leans extra close into Minho’s space and starts fidgeting with anything that’s loose and in his reach—his scarf, a loose thread on his jeans, or Minho’s fingers. He’s definitely not relaxing as much as Minho hoped he would, despite him having actual fun during the day.
At those times, Minho wants to offer them to sleep in the same bed together. It’s not that big of a deal, but for some reason, Minho feels like it’s too intimate for now. He’ll wait until Jisung suggests it.
He does not expect Jisung to suggest something else, though. And not just something else, something that sends Minho’s world spinning and tilting.
It’s just about the fourth day when Minho already loses his patience, because Jisung doesn’t even want to go out for dinner anymore. Minho doesn’t push him—he knows better than that—but to say that he’s bummed out is an understatement. They get some instant ramen at the local grocery store to heat up at the little apartment they rented, but Jisung doesn’t look better once they get home. In fact, he looks worse. Guilty.
“I’m sorry, hyung. I’m… I’m totally ruining this vacation, am I not? I just—I’m not thinking about work but trying not to think about it gets tiring, and… I don’t know,” Jisung says with a scowl, mindlessly stirring his ramen. Minho lets out a sigh and reaches out to touch his hand.
“I mean, I’m not going to deny that this isn’t exactly how I envisioned this, but neither did you. Let’s eat now, we’ll talk later, okay? And don’t worry about disappointing me, you know you are physically incapable of doing that, but I am hereby reminding you once again,” Minho tells him before slurping up some noodles. Jisung snickers.
“Thanks, bestie~” Jisung replies with a cheesy chuckle and Minho almost snorts out his noodles at his overly sweet tone. It luckily doesn’t take much to lighten the mood when he’s with Jisung, and Minho is forever grateful for that, but sometimes they do need to talk it out.
Today is such a talking day, because Minho is kind of desperate to help his precious friend relax, so he sits him on the couch and takes a deep breath. “So, you’re not really relaxing, huh? Time off isn’t helping?” Minho asks and Jisung bites his lip as he nods.
“Well—It is helping, but, like, I’ll probably need a month off to get my mind off of everything,” he admits with a sigh, picking at his thick sweater. Minho hums in thought.
“But, like, what usually relaxes you? Other than being with me, of course,” he then asks and Jisung snickers.
“No, but, you’re right, hyung. Being with you does help. It’s just… Not enough by itself, I guess,” he answers with a shrug. “Or at least, it doesn’t help
fast enough.”
“What about meditation?” Minho suggests.
“Sure. Leaving me alone with my thoughts is a good idea.” Jisung gives Minho a sheepish look, and Minho mirrors it. He should have known that meditation isn’t made for Jisung and his restless mind.
“Okay, well, I know getting drunk won’t help either, but what about, uhm, some good exercise?” he then offers, but Jisung shrugs, just like Minho expected.
“Running around and tiring myself works sometimes, but being with you has the same effect,” Jisung tells him. Minho purses his lips in thought. There is one other thing he can think of that helps blow off steam after a particularly frustrating or stressful day.
“What about sex? Or, I mean, a good masturbation session and then a hot shower or bath? Because I know sex with a stranger will only make you stressed as well.” His ears grow a bit warm as he asks this, but he and Jisung have been friends for so long, it’s nothing too weird for them to discuss. Jisung’s cheeks grow red, however, and he presses his lips into a thin line.
“I don't know,” he stammers, and Minho tilts his head in confusion.
“You don't know if it'll help?” he asks, but Jisung shakes his head.
“I, uhm… I just… God, this is embarrassing.” Jisung rubs a hand along his face and Minho snickers.
“I'm sure it's not. Come on, I told you about my awkward first time,” he says as he bumps their shoulders together. They tell each other just about everything, so Minho is sure that he has heard worse.
“Yeah, but that was like five years ago… And that was your first time, of course it was a little bit awkward. It's not my first time jerking off,” Jisung retorts with a huff. He then softly adds, “I haven’t had time to do much lately, but it's just that I can't… I can't do it anymore. I can't finish.”
“Oh,” Minho dumbly replies, trying his darned best not to imagine Jisung with his hand in his pants. It’s difficult, because for once, Jisung is looking at him, even though he’s obviously embarrassed. There’s something in his expression Minho can’t quite read. Something that makes Minho’s stomach flip and his heart pound.
“Uhm, so, how do you do it?” Jisung then asks, properly facing him as he pulls his legs up onto the couch. Minho has to do a double take, because he didn’t expect Jisung to continue with the conversation like this.
“You want to know how I jerk off?” Minho puts it bluntly, because he’s not going to make this awkward. If it helps Jisung, he’ll tell him everything. Jisung snorts, but he nods, his lips twitching up into a bashful smile. “I don’t know how it would help if I just tell you what I like, because I’m sure you won’t get off on the same things.”
Minho raises an eyebrow at him, because he’s sure that Jisung doesn’t like thinking about being with people like himself, because he probably doesn’t have a big fat crush on himself.
“Okay, but, like…” Jisung trails off, his eyebrows coming together into a thoughtful frown, and Minho waits for him to finish speaking, thinking that he’ll probably drop the subject now, or maybe ask for some tips, but what he does not expect is for Jisung to push further. “Can you… help me? Show me?”
Minho’s eyes grow wide. Show him?
Show him?
He doesn’t know if Jisung means that he should jack off in front of him or that he should help Jisung doing that, but he doesn’t know which one is worse. Probably the first option, because that means that Minho has to be vulnerable in front of him. Too personal.
Touching Jisung’s dick isn’t much better, but at least he won’t be the one masturbating in front of the love of his life in that case. It would be easier to hide his feelings and keep it impersonal if he can hide himself behind the excuse that he’s helping out a friend.
“Like, you want me to help you jerk off?” he asks with a vague hand-gesture and Jisung snorts.
“You’re so blunt, hyung. But, uhm, yes. If that’s not weird,” he answers with a chuckle. His cheeks are a flaming red, but Minho’s ears aren’t any better off.
Is it weird? Is it any weirder if Minho has soul-crushing feelings for him? Is it weird if Minho does it to help out his best friend?
“I might be the worst possible person in the world to judge if something is weird or not,” he deadpans, to mask the way his heart is pounding in his ears. Jisung laughs.
“Okay, uhm, let me rephrase it then. Are you okay with that? Just—Just like a sort of ‘best friends helping each other out’ thing?” he says, and it stings, but Minho didn’t expect anything other than this being a ‘friendly’ thing. Even if Jisung would feel the same, he wouldn’t confess like this.
And Minho knows he should say no. He knows that if he agrees to this he will be walking the edge of a steep cliff, and he knows that this is unknown territory for the two of them and that it’s terrifying.
But Minho is only so strong. His need to help Jisung, to take care of him and to bring a smile on his face whenever he can, wins from his fears. He and Jisung have been through worse than this, and Minho has been succeeding in hiding his feelings for years, so how bad can it get?
“Sure. I’m okay with that,” he blurts out. Jisung’s eyes grow wide.
“Really?” Jisung looks like he didn’t see it coming—like he still doesn’t know that Minho would do anything for him. Minho shrugs and nods.
“I mean, if it’ll help, of course,” he says. Jisung smiles at him, as if Minho’s assurance alone already helps him relax. His cheeks are still red, though, and his hands are curled into fists onto his knees.
When Jisung shifts on the couch, Minho can’t help but notice that he’s a little worked up, but he doesn’t look uncomfortable, because his smile reaches his eyes. Minho then (accidentally) glances at his crotch and sees that he’s already not entirely soft anymore, just from talking about this.
Minho chuckles, something like fondness filling his chest. “Do you want me to help you already, ‘Sung-ah?” he asks with a laugh, and Jisung huffs before slapping his arm.
“It’s been a while, okay? Don’t laugh,” he bites back, but his lips tremble as he tries and fails to hold back a smile. He snorts and laughs with Minho for a moment before standing up and pointing a finger at him. “Go wash your hands and meet me on my bed.”
“Yes sir,” Minho answers with a soft snicker, making sure to hit Jisung’s butt before he leaves. Jisung yelps once again, but this time he doesn’t glare at Minho, and instead he simply scurries away.
Minho takes a moment to calm his rapidly beating heart when he’s washing his hands, trying not to think too much about what’s about to happen, but there’s not much time to think anyway. He is too jittery, unsure if it’s excitement or just the thought of Jisung that’s causing it, so he doesn’t let Jisung wait long.
He finds his friend kneeled on the duvet of the bed, changed into joggers, a small bottle of lube and tissues next to him, dick half-hard and already slightly tenting his pants. Minho exhales at the sight, the beginning hotness of arousal stirring in his stomach.
“Hi there,” Jisung says with a breathy chuckle as Minho crawls into the bed in front of him. Minho snorts.
“Hi. Happy to see me?” he replies as he places his hand onto Jisung’s knee. Jisung shifts a little, his thighs rubbing together. He’s obviously worked up, but he doesn’t let Minho in yet, his posture staying closed off as if he’s wound up tight.
“I always am, aren’t I?” Jisung answers with another breathy chuckle.
“I sure hope you are, but number one tip for letting someone else touch your dick is: actually let them. Relax, please,” Minho replies as he pats Jisung’s thigh, gently rubbing his thumb along it. Jisung lets out a sigh and nods, the tension seeping away from his shoulders and thighs as he slowly lets them fall open for Minho to sit in between.
“Sorry. This is probably why I haven’t been able to finish lately,” Jisung mumbles. Minho hums as he grabs the lube and puts a little bit on his fingers, making sure to warm them up beforehand. Going in with cold and dry hands isn’t a nice experience, Minho knows that all too well.
“Tell me if you wanna stop or whatever, yeah? And tell me when I’m doing something you don’t like,” he says, looking into Jisung’s eyes for a moment. He sees that his pupils are already a bit inflated, and his cheeks are still flushed pink. He looks… tasty.
“Yeah,” Jisung softly replies as Minho pulls the waistband of his joggers down a little so that he can take a hold of his half-hard cock. Jisung lets out a shaky breath at the touch, so Minho starts slow, just getting Jisung fully hard.
This is definitely not the first time Minho has seen Jisung’s cock, but he hasn’t seen it in its full glory yet, nor has he ever touched it. He’s a little bigger than Minho, which already makes Minho’s mouth water, but what Minho is noticing more than that is the way Jisung is so reactive—his breath hitching every time Minho flicks his wrist.
He expected him to be a little sensitive, because he’s so expressive, (and Minho might have imagined it a couple of times at night, with his own hand in his pants,) but seeing and hearing it with his own eyes and ears is different. It’s exhilarating. It sets Minho’s veins on fire in a way that’s new and exciting.
Jisung’s dick hardens pretty quickly in Minho’s hand, his hands curled into tight fists on his legs. The sight makes Minho feel hot and heavy, but he has no problem focusing on Jisung’s pleasure and neglecting himself for now.
“O-Oh, okay, yeah—Do that again,” Jisung gasps when Minho runs his thumb along the head of Jisung’s cock, and his hands fly up to grab Minho’s shoulders. Minho makes the mistake of looking at Jisung’s expression, his flushed cheeks, and slightly parted lips as the latter looks down at both of their laps.
Minho does it again—squeezes and flicks his wrist before pressing his thumb into his cockhead, and he watches Jisung bite his lip to muffle a moan. He’s surprisingly quiet compared to how loud and excited he can be, but maybe he’s holding back. Minho doesn’t necessarily want him to hold back, but he’s not going to say anything for now.
Jisung’s hips stutter. Minho can’t see his cock as Jisung’s underwear obscures the view of everything except the head, but Jisung is probably able to see the way Minho’s hand jerks him off, the way he probably looks just a little bigger in Minho’s hand compared to his own.
God.
The thought makes Minho shudder, and he really wants to see, so he shuffles closer, forcing Jisung’s legs to part wider to fit him. He nears until his knee nudges Jisung’s balls, eliciting another gasp from the younger.
“Still good?” he asks and Jisung nods.
“Y-Yeah. Good, feels good, hyung,” he replies in a whisper, his breath hitting Minho’s warm face. Minho’s stomach tightens, and his cock twitches in his pants as Jisung leans into his space, telling him that he’s feeling good with such a raspy and aroused voice.
“Better than your own hand?” Minho challenges, because although Jisung says it feels good, he doesn't seem to be close, despite Minho picking up the pace.
“Yes— Ah —Yes.” Jisung lets out a sigh, his fingers clenching and his hips stutter again. His face is unfortunately half obscured by his bangs as he looks down at their laps, so Minho reaches out with his right hand to brush his locks away.
Jisung inhales sharply and looks up, his head tilting into Minho’s touch as his blown pupils meet Minho’s. His whole face is flushed and he looks positively delicious . Dangerously so.
Minho quickly looks away, rubbing his thighs together to grant himself some release as well, but as he does so, his knees brush Jisung’s balls and cock, making him whimper.
“Good. You're doing well.” The praise slips out before he can catch it, but Jisung shivers and bucks up into Minho’s hand. “Are you close?”
“I… I think so, but—Ah—I need… I can't,” he babbles incoherently. Minho softens, unsure if he finds this adorable or hot as fuck. Maybe both, because his heart is full and his cock twitches when he looks at the hazy look on Jisung’s face.
He watches Jisung let out soft grunts, his eyebrows drawn together in frustration. He’s too worked up, too tense to let go, and Minho wonders what he can do to make him relax a little more, or to distract him from trying to come and instead let him enjoy this until his body does the work for him.
Minho then gets a good idea, and a little smirk grows on his face. “Don’t worry, ‘Sung-ah, I’ve got you,” he whispers into Jisung’s ear. He leans closer and wraps his right arm around Jisung’s waist before slipping his free hand into his joggers.
Minho sighs in pleasure when he feels the soft skin of Jisung’s ass under his fingers, and he subtly ruts against the mattress as he squeezes the flesh and bites back a moan at how easily the skin gives and stretches.
For a moment, he wonders if he’s being too selfish and if this only brings him pleasure and not Jisung, but then Jisung lets out a choked gasp and startled moan. “Oh—”
“You like that?” Minho asks with a breathy chuckle, squeezing Jisung’s ass again, playing with both cheeks. He’s leaking into his underwear at this point and he’d really like some relief, but he’s a bit preoccupied right now.
“Y-Yes—Oh my—” Jisung cuts himself off with a high whine as he suddenly comes all over Minho’s hand, his grip on Minho’s shoulders tightening as he shudders. Minho is just in time to see Jisung’s expression as he cums, and he almost blows his load at the sight alone.
Minho works him through it as Jisung hides his flushed face against Minho’s chest, panting and shivering before grabbing Minho’s wrist to make him stop. “Okay. Holy shit—I’m—That was—You can stop touching my butt now, Minho-yah,” Jisung says between breaths, dropping honorifics and chuckling as he looks up at Minho, face still completely pink.
“Fine,” Minho says with a laugh. He swallows as he adjusts his hard dick with his clean hand and lets everything sink in a little while he looks at Jisung. He looks gorgeous like this, his hair slightly sweaty, cheeks flushed and a shy but satisfied smile on his face. He looks relaxed and happy, which has always looked prettiest on him.
“Was this okay? Or was it sort of how you envisioned this?” Minho asks as he grabs a tissue to wipe the cum and leftover lube off his hand.
“Yeah. Yeah, it was definitely okay. I—Thank you,” Jisung says with a sincere look. Minho’s heart flips, and he almost forgets about his own little situation, but then Jisung looks down and presses his lips into a teasing grin. “But maybe I should help you too.”
Minho blushes as Jisung looks at his crotch, pupils still blown from before, and his tongue peeks out to wet his lips. Minho thinks he might cum in two seconds if Jisung keeps looking at him like that.
“You don’t have to—” he begins, but Jisung shushes him with a finger on his lips. Minho blinks and wills his heart to calm down a little. He’s been okay so far, but as soon as Jisung touches him, he’s afraid that he might lose control.
“None of that. This is a two-way arrangement. Even if it started because I need to relax,” he retorts, already reaching out to touch Minho’s cock through his pants, but he pauses suddenly and looks up at Minho again, eyes wide—God, Minho wants to kiss him so badly.
“Uhm, if you want of course,” Jisung mumbles with an awkward chuckle. Minho thinks about it for about one second, but Jisung is already so close, and Minho is rock hard, so they might as well go all the way.
“Sure, go ahead,” Minho says, and he sounds way too out of breath for his liking. Jisung’s eyes light up a little and he immediately pushes his hand into Minho’s crotch, punching a groan out of him.
His stomach tightens and he bites the inside of his cheek in an attempt to keep his composure, but then Jisung puts a slicked up hand into his pants and he can’t help but throw his head back in pleasure, finally getting some well-needed friction.
He lazily grinds up into Jisung’s hand, feeling the coil in his stomach tighten more and more. When he looks at Jisung’s concentrated face and imagines what it would be like to kiss his lips, and to suck on them while massaging his ass, he shudders, precum leaking from the head of his cock.
He’s close, and although he’d love to stretch this out, he’d rather finish quickly so he spends less time being vulnerable in front of Jisung. Jisung doesn’t know that his chest is sensitive, but he doesn’t have to know that yet.
Minho slowly brings his hand up to his chest, rubbing a finger over his nipple while Jisung keeps tugging on his cock. The extra stimulation is all he needs to tip over the edge and cum into Jisung’s hand. “Fuck.” Jisung looks up at him with round eyes, his gaze alternating between his chest and face.
A silence falls over them as Minho catches his breath and Jisung slows down his movement. Minho gets a little lost in Jisung’s eyes, searching for something that will prove to him that this has happened and that he’s not dreaming.
“Good?” Jisung asks, pulling him out of his thoughts. Minho nods.
“Yeah. Good. Let’s go take a hot shower.”
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It seems like their mutual handjob session really did help Jisung, because after their shower Jisung just about melts into his arms while they watch a show under a fleece blanket, seemingly completely at ease, and for the coming days he seems able to relax way better.
And Minho can’t stop thinking about it, about Jisung’s flushed face, his hitched breaths and the feeling of his hard cock in Minho’s hand. He doesn’t know if this was a one-time thing or not, but Minho is glad that Jisung’s smile is back in full glory.
He’s not going to pretend like it didn’t happen, because it wasn’t an accident, and he and Jisung aren’t ones to avoid topics like this, especially not if they can joke about it.
“So, me touching your dick has done wonders, huh? Our food still hasn’t arrived and you are still smiling,” Minho comments when they’re having dinner at a tiny local restaurant that is apparently known for its fish dishes, and they’ve been waiting for their meals for quite a while, but they’ve been chatting in between as well as people watching.
“Hyung-ah, shut up, we’re literally in public,” Jisung hisses with eyes wide as saucers, his cheeks growing pink. Minho simply laughs at him and Jisung crosses his arms and huffs. “But I guess you’re right… I thought it was fun, to be honest. Also to touch yours, you know?”
Minho snorts at the way Jisung awkwardly gestures around, but quickly pulls his arms in when he gets shy about it. “I agree,” he replies with a chuckle. “So if you want me to work my magic again, just snap your fingers five times,” he snaps his fingers five times, “and call out Minho-ring~ I’m horny!”
Jisung cackles and hides his face behind his hands, but Minho can still see his delighted expression and scrunched up eyes. It fills his stomach with butterflies, and his ears heat up.
“Okay, okay, and what if when you wanna get more acquainted with my mediocre skills, you call out my prince, my prince~ please come and touch my private parts—!” Jisung says, but just as he finishes speaking, a waiter comes and finally brings their food. He immediately freezes before nodding his head and awkwardly croaking out a thank you.
Minho bites his lower lip to muffle the laughter bubbling up in his throat, and as soon as the waiter leaves, the two of them snort and burst out laughing. They laugh until they’re wheezing and Minho feels tears prick in his eyes.
“Oh my god, oh god—Good thing we’re leaving soon,” Jisung says with an awkward chuckle. They both grab their chopsticks and get eating, but Minho feels like they are finally both able to relax and forget about everything except for enjoying a road trip together.
By the end of the night, they’re still laughing, and once they’re back at their rented apartment, the jittery feeling hasn’t left Minho’s body yet. And he might get a little lost in Jisung’s eyes when the latter is retelling the story of how he accidentally ate mud while doing ground research near a river when he was in college.
And Minho once again realizes that Jisung isn’t made for an office job. He’s curious and smart and actually likes going outside when he can dig in the dirt and put his degree in geography and paleontology to use. It would make him so much happier than a boring and stressful office job where he does paperwork all day despite that not being in the job description.
Minho can get angry about that any day, but Jisung doesn’t seem as passionate about it as he is. Minho knows that Jisung gets stressed about changing jobs, but he definitely should do it soon. It’ll make both of their lives easier and also less stressful, probably.
“Hello? Minho-ring?” Jisung snaps his fingers in front of Minho’s face to get his attention, startling him out of his thoughts. Jisung snickers, and Minho slowly starts realizing what Jisung might be doing—snapping his fingers and calling him by a certain nickname. “You here?”
“Yeah, I’m here. Do you perhaps need me, my prince?” Minho answers with a little smirk. Jisung gasps and purses his lips into an exaggerated thoughtful look, but his cheeks grow a little pink.
“I mean, I’m not stressed or anything, but I might be a little princess in need—prince. Prince in need. Big, uhm, prince. Who wants to have fun—you get it,” Jisung stammers, his face flaming red as he corrects himself. Minho raises an eyebrow at him and laughs, saving these words into a little envelope in his mind to open— later, because however exciting the prospect of calling Jisung princess or prince is, they gotta save the kink talk for later.
If they even get to it.
Right now, Minho kind of just wants to get his hands on Jisung’s cock and have another round of fun, as Jisung calls it. And he almost pushes Jisung against the wall to start kissing him, but he remembers to keep things impersonal and simply reaches out for his hand and pulls him along to his room. “At your service.”
This time, they both undress, and it feels like they are taking a step further in whatever this is that they’ve started. Jisung kisses Minho’s chest as soon as his shirt is off, starting off with gentle pecks under his collar bones before sucking on his pecs as they both lazily jerk each other off.
Minho’s entire torso is flushed, and he threads his hand into Jisung’s hair when the man starts sucking on his nipples. A spike of arousal shoots through his body when Jisung moans against his chest, the vibrations oh so good, and with the added visual of Jisung’s tongue lolling out of his mouth, Minho might burst right then and there.
“Please tug on my hair more, hyung-ah,” the younger one requests, his voice low and breathy. Minho happily complies and pulls Jisung’s head to the side, watching how his eyes flutter close. “ Ah— Thank you. God, you can touch my butt too, hyung-ah. If you want.”
Minho snickers but his head feels a little bit cloudy. He isn’t going to decline grabbing Jisung’s ass, though, because he loves his ass, so he leans back until he’s flat on his back and Jisung is on all fours leaning over him. He grabs onto the supple flesh of his butt and squeezes while Jisung is still kissing his sensitive torso, supporting himself on his elbows while Minho uses his free hand to jerk them both off at the same time.
The slick sound of lube is getting to his head more and more, combined with the feeling of Jisung’s butt under his fingers as he plays with one of the cheeks, stretching it and massaging it until the skin is warm, and the sensation of Jisung’s lips on his chest, he is getting closer and closer to reaching his high, and judging from the dizzingly high and breathy whines slipping from Jisung’s lips, he is not far off either.
And god, Minho wants to see him come undone again, but it’s hard to keep his eyes open when he’s so close himself. Minho gets a little lost in the moment as Jisung ruts into Minho’s hand and he kneads Jisung’s butt cheeks, and his fingers strays between Jisung’s crease, grazing his hole every now and then.
Before he knows it, Jisung’s hips stutter and he spills his load onto Minho’s stomach as he keens and his eyes flutter shut. Seeing Jisung’s fucked out expression causes Minho to let out a startled moan and he follows suit.
Minho catches his breath and laughs when Jisung swats his hand away from his ass. He’d love to stay and cuddle with Jisung, wind down and stay in bed with him, carding a hand through his hair and lazily kissing him until they both fall asleep, but those thoughts will remain a fantasy, because Jisung thanks him with a giggle and a fleeting touch to his cheeks before leaving to go take a hot shower.
Minho is once again reminded that Jisung never intended this to be anything more than ‘friendly fun’, and that it doesn’t mean anything to him, that he doesn’t feel the same fluttering in his chest as Minho does. He probably imagines someone else while they’re doing this, unlike Minho, who manages perfectly fine by simply looking at Jisung.
And it hurts a little to separate after they’re done, but Minho can handle it. Jisung is plenty affectionate outside of the bedroom, but Minho can’t help but imagine what it would be like if they were together. Maybe someday.
Maybe.
(Probably not.)
Minho decides to call it an early night since they’ll leave for another town tomorrow. The ghost touch of Jisung’s lips against his chest haunts him as he packs his bag and checks his phone for texts. They’ve been sending their friends some pictures and updates, but Minho doesn’t think he’ll tell them about his and Jisung’s little ‘arrangment’.
They know about his feelings for Jisung, after all, even if Minho didn’t explicitly tell them. He doesn’t feel like listening to them lecturing him about being selfish or stupid or whatever, and he doubts that they’d want to hear about it anyway.
Minho dreams about Jisung, and while he doesn’t remember it, his heart seemingly does, and it doesn’t really quiet down its pounding throughout the day while Jisung is singing along to the songs that play during the car ride, looking way too adorable with his bear beanie. Minho sings along with him, and it distracts him from the events of last night.
Maybe when this trip is over and Jisung gets a new job, they won’t need to do this anymore, and Minho doesn’t have to deal with his feelings in such intensity anymore. But Minho doesn’t think he’ll mind it if they continue either—it may be selfish, but he craves to be close to Jisung, craves to touch him and be with him, and now that he has gotten a taste of what it’s like to be so close to being intimate with Jisung, deep inside, he wants more.
They don’t do anything for a couple of days, though, and instead simply enjoy their time together, eating or checking out the area, or sometimes apart, when Jisung feels lazy and stays in while Minho goes out on an evening walk to clear his mind.
Those walks allow him to just enjoy a moment of alone time, and although he doesn’t actually ever get sick of Jisung, his heart needs a break sometimes. He knows that Jisung doesn’t mind spending entire weeks by Minho’s side either—not necessarily always doing things together, but rather side by side—because they spend the majority of work days apart already, and they’ve gotten so well adjusted to each other that it feels like being alone together by now, but taking a walk without Jisung helps him gather his thoughts and center his feelings.
And each time, he comes back to Jisung having fallen asleep with his phone on his chest, every plate and bowl they used throughout the day cleaned up or stacked in the dishwasher. It makes Minho feel all warm and fuzzy inside after being out in the cold.
He carries Jisung to bed before washing up himself, and he kind of wishes that they wouldn’t have to go home, but they’ll both have to get back to normal soon.
Or maybe they’ll get back to something not so normal, because when Minho is finishing up packing his bag and getting ready to leave the night before their road trip is over, Jisung suddenly comes into his room and sits behind him, and something is obviously up.
“Hi hyung,” he whispers, sending a shiver down Minho’s spine because of his low tone. Jisung wraps his arms around Minho’s waist and props his chin up on his shoulder. Minho’s ears heat up, but he tries to keep his heartbeat under control.
“Hi ‘Sung-ah. Do you need me to help you pack?” Minho asks with a chuckle, but Jisung shrugs. Minho hears him swallow, feels his heartbeat against his back, almost as fast as his own.
“No, I’m done. But I, uhm…” Jisung trails off, his heart cranking up the pace, and slowly Minho is starting to realize where this is heading. Jisung trails his finger along Minho’s collar bone through his sweater, sending a flush down there. “What about, uhm…”
“What is it, ‘Sung-ah?” Minho asks, his voice lilting up in a teasing tone. He might be a little bit cruel for teasing him, but maybe Minho just wants to hear that Jisung wants him, even if it’s only to feed his fantasy. “What do you want?”
“Ugh, don’t play dumb, hyung,” Jisung softly complains, sweettalking him as he uses honorifics. Minho snickers and turns around. His ears are flaming, but teasing Jisung is just too much fun to stop, and Jisung is blushing already as well.
“You wanna have sex?” he asks and Jisung groans before pushing Minho’s shoulder.
“You’re so blunt, hyung. But yes, I wanna touch your dick, Minho-ring,” he replies as he fidgets with the hem of Minho’s sweater, looking down and making Minho’s mind spin a little. Minho lets out a sigh and grabs Jisung’s wrist.
Jisung flinches and looks up at him with wide eyes, but before he can speak, Minho pulls him up with him. He lets himself fall onto the mattress and pulls Jisung with him. “I hope you brought the lube, then,” he comments with a chuckle, and Jisung laughs, his eyes scruching up in delight.
“I did,” he answers happily, before he brings Minho’s hand to his butt, where Minho can feel the outline of the bottle. He retrieves it from Jisung’s backpocket and puts it on the bed beside him.
“Good,” Minho comments with a smile as he squeezes Jisung’s ass with both hands. Jisung lets out a sigh as his eyes flutter close, and he slips his hands under Minho’s sweater, gently caressing his stomach until they creep up to his chest.
His fingers keep twitching as Minho plays with his ass, and Minho thinks he could spend hours just doing this. He notices that Jisung’s cock is growing hard in his pants, and Minho wonders just how much he likes having his ass played with—maybe he likes it just as much as Minho likes playing with his ass. He also wonders what it would be like to rim him, if he could make Jisung come just with his tongue like that.
He shivers at the thought, and his dick twitches in his pants. Just at that moment, Jisung rubs his nipple between his fingers before putting his head under Minho’s sweater and joining with his tongue. Minho flinches as arousal shoots down his spine.
“God—” He groans and sneaks his hands into Jisung’s pants as well, feeling his skin more directly. His cock is already quite hard, despite neither of them having touched each other anywhere other than the butt or the chest yet, but Jisung seems to be off even worse, because as Minho slowly tugs his pants down, a wet spot appears on Jisung’s underwear.
Slowly but surely, they discard their clothes as they grant each other some relief, but not enough to cum yet. It’s more fun if they drag it out, and Minho thinks they’ve reached a silent agreement on that. It would be easier to keep his composure if they just got it over with quicker, but it’s worth it to see Jisung’s aroused expression and red cheeks. (Other than that it’s worth the better orgasm and higher quality time, of course.)
“Hyung—Can we…? Can you…? Can we fuck?” Jisung suddenly whispers into his ear. They’re both fully naked now, Jisung leaking precum onto Minho’s thigh as he’s seated on top of it, and Minho’s cock is hard and red against his stomach, twitching at the request.
He freezes, his fingers slowing down as they’re still relentlessly playing with Jisung’s ass, stretching them and kneading them, and his heartrate spikes. Jisung continues subtly rolling his hips against Minho’s thigh, not noticing Minho’s little crisis at all.
“Are you sure?” Minho asks, his voice sounding a little shaky. He tries not to think about fucking Jisung—his hips making Jisung’s ass jiggle—nor about riding him, feeling Jisung’s cock stretch him probably just right. Fuck.
Jisung nods. “Yeah, that would be nice. If—If you want that,” he adds, looking up at Minho with blown pupils, flushed cheeks, and red lips from chewing on them. Minho wishes that it was him who made his lips look like that, but he’ll have to do with the visuals alone.
He really wants to go all the way with Jisung, but he can’t help but force himself to think about it for a moment longer. Because despite how incredibly aroused he is and how badly he wants this, they can’t dive into this without a second thought.
“But you… You’ve never gone that far, have you?” Minho asks softly. He remembers Jisung telling him about something like a hand job and blowjob with a boyfriend once, but never something else. He has never told Minho about having a first time, awkward or not.
“I haven't, but it's okay, I… I've fingered myself a lot. I… I have a dildo, too—you know? The one Felix got me as a prank. I can take it—It's not like you have much experience either,” Jisung replies with a chuckle, a desperate edge to his voice as he grinds down. Minho bites back a moan as Jisung’s fingers come up to grab his hard and leaking cock, doing a good job at convincing him already. “Do you want to? You can say no, I— ah— want this to be fun for both of us—Hyung, oh my gosh.”
Minho grins as he teases Jisung’s hole with a dry finger, but he’s also a little breathless because of how badly Jisung seems to want this. “I do, I want this, but—Are you okay with me being your first time?” he asks, just to be sure that neither of them will regret this.
“I—Yes. Rather you than some other guy. I know you'll make me feel comfortable,” Jisung admits softly, and Minho’s heart flutters and fills with something incredibly sweet. It’s a simple thing to Minho— of course he’ll make Jisung feel comfortable, the need to do so is like breathing to him—but it’s relieving to know that Jisung trusts him to do so as well.
“Of course,” Minho whispers in reply, and Jisung’s hand slows down on his dick as he looks at him and shows him a little smile. Minho feels a bit (a lot) breathless, but he quickly distracts himself and squeezes Jisung’s butt again, eliciting a soft whine from his friend.
He then wants to grab the lube, but he pauses as he realizes something. “But—Did you bring a condom?”
Jisung’s eyes widen and a guilty smile grows on his face. “I might have not brought that. I mean—I don’t, uhm… I don’t even think I have any at all,” he admits with a sigh and he lets go of Minho’s cock before he slowly starts grinding on his thigh again. He looks disappointed, a small pout on his lips and Minho wants to kiss it away.
Instead, he blurts, “Don’t worry, I can still finger you if you want. We can fuck another time,” and he almost immediately regrets it. This means that they’ll have to continue this even after they get home. It won’t be a ‘what happens on vacation stays on vacation’ thing, but it will be a them thing. They’ll have to buy condoms and lube and they’ll probably get tested for STDs and it will all be so that they can have sex with each other. (And no one else.)
“Yes. Yes, please,” Jisung answers with a sigh full of pleasure, and he gets off before turning around and lying down on his stomach and wiggling his ass a little, inviting Minho to touch him. He won’t decline such a tempting invitation, and he jumps forward to grab onto Jisung’s buttcheeks.
Jisung giggles as he looks over his shoulder, but it turns into a moan when Minho squeezes and coaxes his hips to move against the towel on the duvet under him. “Ah, hyung… Are—Are you okay with this, too? Should I— hmm —help you out first?”
“Nah, I’m good. I… I was thinking of using your ass to get off later,” Minho admits breathily, warming up some lube on his fingers, and he isn’t sure if Jisung moans at the thought of him doing that or at the way Minho’s index finger comes up to circle his rim, but he nods eagerly.
Minho is rock hard and leaking, still, but he can wait a little longer if it means that he can get a reward. Arousal pools hot in his stomach at the thought of getting his cock between Jisung’s cheeks later, but the sight of his finger slowly disappearing into his hole might be even hotter.
Jisung buries his face into a pillow to muffle his sounds, but Minho pauses and reaches forward to pet his head. “Hey, don’t hide. You need to tell me if I’m hurting you or if I need to slow down, okay?”
“R-Right,” Jisung says as he turns his face. Minho softens and rubs his hand along the small of his back, slowly moving his finger and wiggling it a little, studying Jisung’s reactions. He’s not unfamiliar with fingering himself, and he has fingered someone else once as well, but he still doesn’t want to hurt Jisung.
He grazes Jisung’s prostate and watches the man jolt and bite his lips to muffle a moan. “You can add ‘nother one, hyung-ah,” he tells him, and Minho is incredibly endeared by the way he talks and calls him hyung so often when they’re doing this.
Minho adds some more lube before slowly pressing his middle finger in as well. Jisung tenses up a little but he quickly relaxes and starts rocking back onto Minho’s fingers, his cock rubbing against the mattress as well. He lets out puffs of breath every time Minho grazes his prostate. Minho might have short fingers, but he’d like to think that he knows how to use them.
“Ah, hyung… Feels good,” Jisung says with a soft whine. Minho groans, he’s getting a little impatient now, craving for some relief, so he speeds up his movement and aims for Jisung’s prostate as the latter fucks himself on Minho’s fingers. Jisung continuously lets out soft ‘ah’s, and Minho listens to them like they’re music.
His cock twitches when Jisung whimpers, and he doesn’t know if he wants to look at his flushed face or at the way his fingers disappear into his hole, knuckles catching on his rim every time he pulls out.
“You can add another. Want another,” Jisung pleads softly.
“Fuck. Sure. Anything,” Minho replies, and he adds some more lube before carefully adding his ring finger. He watches the way Jisung’s hole sucks his finger in, feels the way Jisung shivers at the intrusion, and waits for him to move before meeting his shallow thrusts with pointed jabs at his prostate.
“Hnng—Oh my god, hyung-ah… Minho hyung,” Jisung babbles, and Minho’s head starts spinning. For some reason the way he says his name almost pushes him over the edge, and he’s sure that if he had his hand on his dick, he would have cum right then and there.
“Good, ‘Sung-ah?” he asks in a whisper, because he’s too aroused to think straight by now. And he really wants to cum. Jisung nods and makes an affirmative sound, so Minho sneaks his hand under Jisung’s stomach to jack him off in time with his fingers fucking him.
Almost immediately, Jisung’s eyes roll back and he cums with a high whine. The sight is honestly debauched, and Minho keeps his eyes peeled to commit it to memory. “Oh, oh, hyung—Oh,” Jisung pants as Minho works him through it, stopping when Jisung scrunches his nose and starts squirming under him.
Jisung takes a moment to catch his breath and Minho pulls his fingers out, using the leftover lube to smoothen the glide of his own hand on his neglected cock. He’s still rock hard, and he thinks it won’t take long for him to cum.
“Hyung, you—You can…” Jisung wiggles his hips to show what he means, somehow getting a little shy now that he finished, but Minho meets his gaze to make sure that he’s okay with this. Minho really wants to grind between Jisung’s cheeks, but he should keep it safe and try to keep away from his hole.
He makes a fist around the head of his cock and fucks into it as he grinds against Jisung’s ass, his balls hitting his cheeks. The soft and warm skin feels great against the underside of his cock, but Jisung tells him to go in between, but Minho shakes his head.
“N-Next time,” he mindlessly promises, and he bites back a moan. He’s so close, feels like the coil in his stomach is about to snap, and it’s difficult to keep his composure. He really wants to let go and fuck Jisung properly—he’s loose already, and Jisung wants it—but he can’t. Just a little longer.
Jisung clenches his cheeks and Minho bites his lip to hold back an embarrassingly loud groan. Jisung continuously grinds back and clenches, which is all Minho needs to cum all over Jisung’s lower back, a high moan escaping his lips. Jisung’s ass is really deadly.
“Shit,” he curses as he works his fist down to prolong the high of his orgasm, trying not to meet Jisung’s eyes as the latter is looking over his shoulder at him.
“Woah—Fuck,” Jisung whispers and he quickly hides his face again. Minho catches his breath and chuckles as he pats Jisung on the back and grabs a tissue and a towel to clean them up. They meet eyes for a moment, but neither of them are able to hold each other's gaze for long.
Jisung is a little quiet, but he gives Minho a kiss on the side of his head and whispers a small thank you before he leaves the room and leaves Minho with a sting in his heart. He washes away the jitters in the shower, and he immediately jumps into bed afterwards, trying to ignore any thoughts about Jisung from entering his mind.
It’s impossible, and it has always been. Jisung has simply set roots inside his mind and it would take a lot of weeding and digging to get him out of there. He doesn’t want to remove Jisung from his mind though, it would hurt the soil too much, but the longer he keeps him there and treasures him, the deeper the roots settle and the more difficult it becomes to ignore how much he means to Minho, and how much Minho feels for him.
The seemingly simple act of helping Jisung relax on their road trip has turned into a full-blown friends with benefits arrangement, with no sign of stopping anytime soon. Minho feels like he can’t just hit the breaks right now, not when he has already started pummeling down the cliff by promising Jisung to have sex with him later.
He’s waiting to smash into pieces, but he might as well make it a spectacular crash, right? Go out with a bang, perhaps with some fireworks, and make it worthwhile for both him and Jisung. If anything, he thinks this will be worth it as long as Jisung comes out feeling better. That’s all that matters.
If he crashes and burns in the process, then at least it has been for a good cause.
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The way home is not as tense as Minho feared it would be. Jisung is obviously handling this way better than he is—of course he is, this is all to make Jisung relax, and yesterday night’s session was probably a way for him to prevent himself from getting anxious or tense today.
He does seem to have something on his mind, though, because he merely hums along with the music on the radio on the way back. If there’s anything Minho is good at, it’s reading Jisung’s mood (usually, when he’s not distracted by his own stupid feelings).
“What’s up, ‘Sung-ah?” he asks as he taps his fingers on the steering wheel. “Anything you wanna say?”
“Oh, well…” Jisung definitely has something on his mind. Minho glances to the side to see him purse his lips in thought. “I was wondering if yesterday night was okay, you know? You were asking me if I’m okay with everything but I kind of didn’t really return that. I’m still… uhm, getting used to doing this with someone, and I get a little floaty in the head, you know?”
Minho softens and snickers. He thinks it’s sweet of Jisung to think about him even after they’re done, but that’s how he is—kind-hearted, patient, and caring. “I understand, ‘Sungie. I think it’s difficult to keep my head straight when we’re in the middle of it, you know? You were doing fine. I told you what I wanted, right?”
“You did. Thank you for that, I just… I don’t want you to put my pleasure before your own, you know?” Jisung assures him with an awkward chuckle. Minho cackles at that statement.
“What? So you can put mine above yours? Jisung-ah, you’re letting me touch and play with your ass. I love that,” he assures him, and Jisung starts laughing as well. Jisung already puts Minho’s needs above his own so frequently, cheering Minho up when he's frustrated with some stupid programming stuff, even when Jisung himself is tired. He's always honest, but he’s also sometimes too kind, forgetting about himself in the process.
“Okay, good, because I had a lot of fun yesterday evening, I just wanted to know if you did, too. And if there's anything you want to do,” Jisung adds with a chuckle. “And, uhm, if you have a preference for position?”
“Why? Do you have one?” Minho asks in return, kind of hinting at the way Jisung wanted Minho to fuck him last night. Minho doesn’t think he minds either way, as long as he gets to have fun with Jisung.
“I don’t know. I’m okay with trying things out,” Jisung replies with a shrug. Minho really likes the idea of finding out what he and Jisung are into together, but the idea that there’s no real feelings behind it makes him long for more.
“I think it would be good if I top first? Like we were about to do last night, because well, it’s easier to control for me. I’ve done it once before,” Minho suggests. He then glances to the side and adds with a chuckle, “And, like, I’ve seen your hips move. I think you need some practice.”
Jisung snorts. “Well, I’m sorry that I don’t have sexy dancer hips like you do, Minho-yah. But I think that’s a good idea,” he responds. Minho lets out a surprised cackle as Jisung mentions sexy dancer hips, when Minho simply follows some dance classes during the weekend. He wonders if Jisung really thinks he’s sexy or if he’s just saying this as a joke.
When they get home, the day is almost over, and they simply get settled before ordering some food and watching a show together, huddling together for warmth and catching up on some quality time with the cats. Minho isn’t looking forward to going back to work, but alas, life doesn’t always go how Minho wants it.
He just hopes that Jisung will be able to look for another job without getting too stressed. Minho makes sure to talk to him about it and offers to help him look around for a new job after his dance classes, and Jisung seems pretty convinced that he should quit as well. They’ll have to see what life brings them, though.
What Minho doesn’t expect, is to get thrown back into quite the chaos at work, a client being unsatisfied with the program he made and demanding impossible improvements. Minho patiently tells them what he can and can't do, but it turns into a long back and forth of frustration, and in between getting tested and buying condoms and lube, Minho feels like he’s coiling up a bit.
His first week is decidedly a lot more stressful than Jisung’s, but Jisung is kind to him throughout, offering to help him cook, heat up leftovers, do the dishes, hugging him while he finishes his work, and distracting him with jokes and a positive view of how he’s doing at his own workplace.
“They’ve been getting used to me not being there, I guess, because it’s been relatively okay this week,” Jisung tells him as he swallows the last bits of rice. Minho chuckles at the rice grain stuck on Jisung’s cheek, and he reaches over the table to tap it off. Jisung snickers abashedly.
“I’m happy to hear that,” Minho answers with a small smile. Jisung raises his eyebrows at Minho, who then lets out a sigh. “I finally got this guy off my back today, but I’m so… Ugh. I kinda need to blow off some steam.”
Jisung grins before he crosses his arms and puts up an exaggerated thinking face. “Oh my, I wonder who could help you with that, Minho-ring… Perhaps there’s a certain friend who is willing to offer to touch your private parts to help you blow off steam.”
Minho cackles, but Jisung calling him Minho-ring is making him start to develop a Pavlovian response of getting horny. On one hand, he wants to make sure that Jisung is ready to have sex with him, but on the other hand he thinks it’ll be good to do this while Jisung is still feeling well and energetic.
“I wonder, too. Perhaps there’s someone who could offer his perky butt to me.” Minho hums and tilts his head as he leans his chin on his hands and grins at Jisung. Jisung cackles and hits Minho’s chest. He then grabs Minho’s hand to pull him up and clean up before taking him to his bedroom with him. He makes sure that his cats are not in the bedroom and then he invites Jisung inside with hum.
Minho’s heart flutters and his face heats up as he watches Jisung’s coy smile, so excited to get him on the bed before grabbing lube and a condom. Minho watches him from the bed, and he gladly invites him on his lap, enjoying the sight of Jisung’s red cheeks.
“I can maybe ride you if you’re tired, hyung-ah,” he suggests softly, rubbing his hands along Minho’s neck. Minho softens but he shakes his head.
“Nah, don’t worry about it. I’m physically in good shape, so I wanna do this,” he answers, slowly sneaking his hand under Jisung’s shirt and caressing his sides. Jisung shivers on top of him and nods.
“Okay, let me do some of the pre-work for you, then,” he says and he purposefully pushes his hips down, his ass brushing his crotch. Minho moans and latches onto Jisung’s neck to kiss him there. Jisung sighs and gets his hands onto Minho’s pecs, squeezing them and stimulating both his nipples and cock at the same time.
It's crazy how Jisung already knows how to drive him insane, after only three sessions together. Minho guesses that he gave his sensitive chest away the first time, but he didn't necessarily expect Jisung to pay attention to him.
Minho can barely focus anymore already, because Jisung apparently doesn’t feel like dragging the foreplay out for long. He pulls Minho’s sweater off and latches onto Minho’s nipples once again, sucking relentlessly.
Minho gasps as his cock hardens embarrassingly fast, and he grabs onto Jisung’s hips to slow him down. “Hey there, princess, we’re not in a hurry,” he says, the nickname slipping out before he can catch it and shove it back down his throat.
Jisung lets out a surprised and loud moan, though, and Minho can’t help but smile as he brings his hands up to Jisung’s neck. “You like that?” he asks and Jisung nods, looking up at Minho through his long lashes, a small string of spit connecting his lips with Minho’s hard nipple.
Jisung’s face is flushed just as much as Minho’s neck and chest are, and Minho’s cock twitches in his pants at the sight. He pats Jisung’s cheek. “Well, I think it’s cute how you call me hyung when you get riled up, so you can continue doing that.”
“O-Okay, hyung-ah,” he answers bashfully, as if calling him hyung now that he knows Minho likes it is more embarrassing than the way he’s grinding on Minho’s lap and licking his chest. Minho groans and bucks his hips up, arousal pooling hot in his stomach.
They take everything off except for their underwear, and now Minho takes the opportunity to lick and suck all over Jisung’s neck chest. And despite wanting to leave marks, he can’t. Jisung is not his to mark.
His heart stutters at the thought, but he shakes them away and continues kissing all over Jisung's torso. Jisung puts his hands into Minho’s hair and tugs a little at it every time he flinches when Minho reaches a spot he likes.
In the meantime, Jisung keeps grinding his ass on Minho’s clothed dick, teasing him with a preview of what’s to come. And Minho is getting more and more impatient, longing for Jisung’s ass under his fingers and around his cock already.
He pushes Jisung forward and kisses down until he mouths at the outline of Jisung’s hard length through his briefs, one hand coming up to cup his balls. Jisung lets out the most delicious whine, tightening his grip on his hair and sending a spike of pleasure down Minho’s spine.
And Minho would love to suck him off properly one day, but tonight they’re doing something else, and it might be better to not get too ambitious.
“Okay—Okay, let’s get going, hyung-ah,” Jisung says as he subtly tugs at his hair, probably thinking the same.
As soon as Minho backs away, Jisung pulls off his briefs and turns onto his stomach, presenting his ass to him, and Minho appreciates it like it’s a three course meal. He takes a moment to get his hands on his ass and play with it, until Jisung starts squirming.
“Hyung… I know you think my butt is like a stress-ball, but don’t you wanna get on with it?” Jisung breathily asks him, and Minho snickers, giving his buttcheeks a last good squeeze before patting them, resisting the urge to lean in and take a bite.
“Okay, okay, princess.” He relents and grabs the lube to start opening Jisung up. He’s glad that Jisung always lies on his stomach when they’re doing this, because Minho thinks it would be too much to be face to face with him. His eyes would probably give him away in no time.
He inserts a finger into Jisung’s hole, taking his time opening him up while caressing his lower back, since he doesn’t want to hurt Jisung. Jisung lets out little breaths of pleasure every time Minho grants him a little bit of relief by grazing his prostate, but not enough to get him frustrated. (Hopefully.)
By the time he’s fucking him with three fingers, Minho is once again hard and leaking in his underwear, mesmerized by the way Jisung’s hole sucks up his fingers and clenches around them. Both of their bodies are getting progressively more flushed, and they haven’t even gotten to the fucking yet.
Minho’s heart is pounding harshly in his chest as he realizes that he’ll share Jisung’s first time with him, and he’s reminding himself that Jisung told him it’s okay, but he still finds himself asking. “Ready? Still sure you wanna do this?”
Jisung nods, cheeks red and pupils blown, but he looks over his shoulder with determination in his eyes. “Yes, yes, hyung. I want to. I’m ready,” he answers, and he reaches back to pull Minho closer. “Wanna do this for you,” he adds, and Minho bites his lip to muffle a whimper, his heart jumping into his throat. For me. “And you? Are you okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay. Just making sure,” he answers quickly, and he sends Jisung a smile before squeezing his ass again, hopefully distracting Jisung from how emotional he’s getting. Jisung returns the smile and leans back to grind his ass against Minho’s hard cock. Minho cackles and softly slaps him. “Patience, I need a condom.”
“You don’t have to,” Jisung says with a half-moan, but Minho knows it’s the cotton-brain speaking. Yes, they’ve tested, but a condom will make the cleaning process afterwards a lot quicker and easier.
“Next time,” he promises again, as if it’s nothing. As if this means just as little to his heart as it does to Jisung’s. He wishes that were true, that he doesn’t long to be more intimate with Jisung, and that it doesn’t feel like his feelings overflow every time they get naked in front of each other or kiss anywhere that’s not the lips or the face.
But the truth is that when Jisung doesn’t look at him—in between moments of arousal—Minho is sure that his eyes show the love he feels for Jisung, unrestrained.
And thus, when he rolls on the condom, lubes up his cock and slowly pushes inside, he hides his face on Jisung’s back, holding him against his chest with an arm around his waist. At least he can blame his rapid heartbeat on his arousal.
He pays attention to the way Jisung’s face scrunches each time he pushes a little further, letting him adjust slowly until Minho’s hips are flush against his ass. Minho lets out a sigh in relief, the way Jisung’s walls are hugging his cock feels just right, and he feels the coil in his stomach tighten.
“Oh god, hyung—Oh my god.” Jisung whimpers as his fingers grab the sheets.
“Good?” Minho asks, gritting his teeth a little as he fights the urge to grind up into the tight heat, and Jisung nods frantically.
“Good. Really good. You’re—You’re a good size,” he answers with a chuckle. Minho snickers, his heart fluttering in fondness and pride. They fit well together, is all his mind provides. What a bittersweet thought.
He hums and rubs Jisung’s back, eliciting a sigh of relief from him. “‘M ready, you can move.”
Minho starts off slow, rolling his hips and trying to get used to the feeling. Jisung arches his back to help him find his sweet spot. Minho groans because of the delicious friction, and he straightens himself, grabbing onto Jisung’s hips to ground himself.
He sets up a pace, his head getting clouded with pleasure as he listens to Jisung’s soft moans. He looks down to where they're connected, watching his cock disappear between Jisung’s ass cheeks, which jiggle every time he thrusts forward.
The sight is even hotter than Minho imagined, the feeling even more heavenly, punching moan after moan out of him. “Shit, Jisung-ah—Doing well. Feels great. Thank you,” he mindlessly praises his friend, unable to consider whether this is weird to say or not, the only thing on his mind is cumming and making Jisung cum even harder.
“Hahh. Me too— Oh gosh, right there, hyung.” Jisung squirms as he meets Minho’s thrusts with shallow movements. Minho aims and tries to hit his prostate with at least every third thrust.
Jisung’s breathing speeds up, and he scrambles to grab at the covers before grabbing Minho’s wrist. “Little slower, hyung-ah,” he asks softly, and Minho immediately takes a deep breath before slowing down his moves.
“Sorry,” he apologizes under his breath, rubbing his thumb along Jisung's hip. He got a little lost in his mind there, and he hopes that he didn’t hurt him.
“'S okay. Didn't hurt, just feels nicer this way.” Jisung's assurance makes Minho feel better, and he continues with renewed confidence. Jisung hums and keens when Minho hits his prostate and Minho realizes that he's right, it's easier for Minho to aim when he keeps his pace a little more controlled, but it feels just as good to him as well, the drag of Jisung’s walls against his cock oh so nice.
Slowly but surely, Jisung’s breathing speeds up and Minho starts losing his mind as he teeters closer to the edge of an orgasm, the sight of Jisung’s fucked out expression and the feeling of his tight hole sending him high up in the sky.
“Fuck, you close, Jisung-ah?” he asks in between heavy pants, and Jisung nods, blindly reaching back to guide Minho’s hand to his cock, hard and leaking and heavy between his legs. Jisung reacts with his entire body when Minho starts jerking him off, a loud moan escaping his lips as he tries to keep meeting Minho’s feverish thrusts.
He clenches down on Minho, almost sending him over the edge right away. Minho whines and leans his forehead against Jisung’s back, closing his eyes as he's overtaken by a sudden wave of intense pleasure.
He almost misses the way Jisung cums after a particularly harsh jab against his prostate, and the sound of Jisung’s orgasm is all Minho needs to spill into the condom as well, groaning as he tries to keep his pace steady for a little longer.
He squeezes his eyes shut and shivers as he almost works himself to oversensitivity, but he slowly stops moving and takes a moment to catch his breath.
Jisung slumps first, and he rolls over when Minho slowly pulls out and ties the condom. When he's done, he accidentally meets eyes with Jisung, both of them catching their breaths with equally flushed faces.
“Holy shit, hyung,” Jisung breathes out, and simultaneously, they burst into laughter. Any leftover jitters are shaken off by their shared giggles.
“I take it that it was good?” Minho asks with a grin, and he flops down next to Jisung, who nods with a sigh.
“Yeah. Really good. But did you manage to blow off steam? Was it fun for you too?” he asks in return, and Minho can't help but smile and hum in response. He feels a lot better.
“I had a lot of fun. Thank you, Jisung-ah,” Minho says with a soft pat on his cheek. Jisung giggles.
“Good. Show later? You can take a shower first, by the way, I will rest for a bit longer and clean up here,” he replies with an adorable little grin as he runs a hand through his sweaty hair. Minho’s heart skips a beat, and he feels like a fool. A fool so, so in love.
He takes another minute to let his muscles rest and to calm his breathing. He also takes the time to just stare at Jisung, who patiently waits for him to answer.
“Sure, but I want it spotless in here, okay?” Minho demands, to mask the butterflies in his stomach. Jisung laughs and throws a pillow at him. Minho fights the urge to kiss him silly and simply leaves the room to take a shower and let this all sink in.
He just had sex with Jisung. He has just been the first person to have his dick inside his ass. All because Jisung wanted it.
But he doesn’t want Minho.
He just wants relief, and he would have probably accepted a friends with benefits arrangement with Chan or Hyunjin, too. Because while they're not his best friends, they still are part of their close friend group, as well as objectively handsome guys with more experience than him, just like Minho.
And Jisung ends up falling asleep only ten minutes into the show. Minho doesn't mind, he's tired as well. For a moment, he considers falling asleep on the couch next to Jisung, taking him into his arms and blaming the sleepiness and cold outside for the moment of weakness.
And if he ends up falling asleep during that consideration, then maybe that's a good thing, because that way he can sneakily admire Jisung’s sleepy face for longer in the morning.
Jisung’s lips are slightly parted as he peacefully breathes, cheek squished against the couch cushion. Minho gently brushes some hair out of his face, and he lets his fingers linger against his jaw.
His feelings suddenly overwhelm him again—something that seems to be happening more and more often lately—and he has to look away. He blindly presses a kiss onto the top of Jisung’s head and leaves to go on a morning jog, hopefully clearing his head a bit so that he can take on the day again.
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Another work week, another opportunity for Minho to distract himself from the lingering flutter in his stomach. His job and housework are just enough to keep his feelings in the back of his mind for the better part of the day, but Minho fears that he will have to work harder to properly hide his feelings from Jisung.
When they're having sex it's especially important, because Minho doesn't want Jisung to be uncomfortable, he doesn't want to cross any lines and—perhaps ruin is too strong—make things awkward or worse between them.
At least Minho is sure that his heart won't come out whole if he manages to overstep or upset Jisung. It's ironic, because he's doing this for Jisung in the first place. He loves him, and loving him is like breathing to Minho, but it's difficult when the line between giving him the love he deserves and holding back his feelings to protect both of them is a slippery slope with a bad ending if he manages to fall to either side of that slope.
And maybe Minho is a little selfish, too, when it comes to loving Jisung, because he doesn’t think he wants to put a stop to their arrangement. He's gotten addicted to Jisung’s touch, to feeling his lips on his chest and his soft skin underneath his fingers. He justifies it by thinking about how Jisung wants this, but he can’t help but wonder if it would be different if Jisung knew about his feelings.
Minho is startled out of his routine of coding and thinking about his best friend by the sound of someone knocking on the door. Minho wonders if it’s Jisung, but it’s too early for him to be home.
He wonders if it's maybe one of his cats, but all three of them are either on the couch or under his desk. He frowns as he opens the door to see Felix standing there.
“Hey Minho hyung,” he says with a little wave. Minho tilts his head at him before looking down at the backpack he’s wearing. “Uhm, am I bothering you? Did you finish work? I brought cheesecake and kimchi, by the way.”
Minho hums. Jisung will like the cheesecake, and Minho could use some extra kimchi for cooking. “I’m almost done, but Jisungie isn’t home yet. And I don’t remember inviting you over,” he answers with a shrug.
Felix chuckles. “Do I need an excuse to come over?” The man simply walks past Minho into the apartment. Minho laughs and slaps him on the butt before sitting back at his computer.
“Okay, make yourself at home, I guess, Lix-yah. I’ll finish up my work,” he replies as Felix already disappears into the kitchen. Minho wonders what he’s doing here, but then again, he and Jisung have been slacking a bit in terms of meeting up with their friends lately. He texts Jisung that Felix is over and that he should come home quickly if he wants to have some cheesecake.
(That’s a lie. He will make sure that at least half of the cheesecake will be left for Jisung when he comes home. Yes, because he loves him, and there’s nothing better than seeing Jisung’s cheesecake smile.)
“Is it okay if I grab us a snack, hyung?” Felix calls from the kitchen and Minho huffs as he rolls his eyes before finishing up the last bits of coding and documentation and joining his friend.
“Why are you really here, Lix-yah?” He crosses his arms and leans against the fridge as he watches Felix fill two bowls with chips. The younger man pushes one bowl into Minho’s hands as he snatches a chip from his own and he shrugs. “Be honest.”
“Well, you and Jisung haven’t exactly caught up with us after your vacation. We were a bit concerned. Mainly Chan hyung, but the rest of us were kind of hoping to meet up and hear about your trip too, you know?” Felix explains as they sit on the couch together. Minho’s eyes widen and he shows Felix a sheepish smile.
He’s right. They’ve kind of been slacking, but he guesses that neither Jisung nor he wants to bring up their arrangement in front of their friends, and they’re both kind of bad liars. (And, well, their friends know them a little too well to get away with lying.)
Felix already proves that thought by raising his eyebrows at Minho. A grin grows on his face and he pushes at Minho’s shoulder. “Come on. Did something happen, like, between you two?” he asks with a giggle.
Minho’s ears heat up despite his best efforts and he shrugs. “Uhm, no we just had a nice and relaxing time. It took a while for Jisungie to actually get rid of the stress, but, yeah. We ate a lot as you saw, went to parks, markets, and movies and stuff…”
“Hyung. Come on. I get it if you wanna wait until Jisungie is back, but can’t you give me a little hint?” Felix snickers and wiggles his eyebrows at Minho, who quickly shakes his head.
“No. Nothing happened and you will not bring this up with Jisung, okay? I will stuff you into the oven. You hear me, Lix? Do you want to be fried?” He points a threatening finger at him. Felix throws his hands up and scowls.
“Woah! Hyung. Chill, please. I won’t bring it up,” he pleads. “I’m sorry if something bad happened, by the way, but you know we’re all here for you two, yeah?”
“Yeah, I know. It’s just that… Things have gotten a little complicated between us. For me, at least. And I’m trying to not make things complicated for him, you know?” Minho says as he gestures around vaguely. Felix frowns.
“Like you have a friends with benefits thingy or what?” he asks with a snort, obviously joking, but he hits bulls-eye straight away. Minho clears his throat and presses his lips together, keeping quiet and letting Felix read it off his face himself. Slowly but surely, Felix’s smile fades and makes places for an incredulous expression.
“You’re kidding. You two are not—Stop. Don’t fuck with me, hyung. You can’t be serious.” Felix holds up his hand and looks at him with wide eyes.
“I didn’t even say anything,” Minho deadpans, but Felix ignores it.
“Why would you do that? Why wouldn’t you just, you know, do it properly?” he asks, looking at Minho as if he’s an idiot. Maybe he is, but what else was he supposed to do then? Decline Jisung and confess?
“What do you mean, do it properly? Is friends with benefits not a valid thing to be with your best friend?” Minho feigns innocence, but not even sweet Felix believes him. But then again, Felix is not as naive as he lets on sometimes.
“Not when you’re in love with said best friend, hyung,” he comments, painfully honest and painfully correct.
“Okay, yes, but Jisung was the one who suggested it. To, uhm, help him relax,” Minho corrects him.
“You’re an idiot, hyung. Do you really think that matters?” Felix pushes his finger into Minho’s forehead, and Minho would scold him for being impolite if he cared enough to joke right now, but all he can do is scowl. “I don’t even know how you’re doing this. I didn’t think either of you would be the type to need this—Is it really worth pretending that you’re not in love with him, hyung?”
“Well, if it makes him happy, yes,” Minho answers easily, and Felix pauses, seemingly taken aback by his serious answer.
“Oh my god. That’s actually really sweet, but I still think you’re stupid. What if Jisung would be happier with you, huh? And you’re not even offering him that option,” he then replies, but Minho shakes his head. There’s no way he can even think to accept that option. They’ve been best friends for years and years, he would know, right? Or at least have the faintest clue about Jisung’s feelings, right? Jisung isn’t that hard to read usually.
He wants to say so, but just at that moment, the lock clicks and Jisung comes inside, and loudly announces that he hopes they left some cheesecake for him. Minho’s stomach flips when he meets Jisung’s eyes, both a nervous and lovesick trick.
Minho doesn’t understand why his feelings have bubbled up so much again, all of a sudden, but he’ll have to work a little harder to push them back. It’s easier when Felix is there to distract him as well during dinner, but Minho can’t help but be a little nervous, worrying that Felix will accidentally spill something.
Luckily, he doesn’t, and the night ends well. They promise to meet up with everyone some time soon, and Minho just hopes that they won’t all react like Felix and start asking them difficult questions.
And maybe Minho should think about what Felix said to him. What if Jisung would be happier with him? Is he really not offering him that option? Why would Minho need to offer it when Jisung was the one to suggest this to be a friendly thing?
But maybe there’s some truth to what he’s saying. Maybe he should leave Jisung some sort of choice. But that would mean confessing, and that thought is still too terrifying, because confessing would mean conveying his feelings, and everyone knows how bad Minho is at doing that.
Which is probably why he finds himself in bed with Jisung again a couple of nights later. They both had a pretty rough day at work, and this time, they didn’t even really have to do the whole skit, calling each other prince or Minho-ring or whatever. They simply locked eyes and knew what the other wanted.
And now Minho sits naked on his bed, his entire chest flushed as he holds Jisung by the hair, the latter kissing his abdomen and making his way down to Minho’s half-hard cock. Minho shivers when Jisung licks at the head of his cock, punching a moan out of him.
The younger one doesn’t take him far into his mouth, but he’s eager, which makes up for a lot. He licks him like his cock is a lollipop, and Minho throws his head back in pleasure, tugging on Jisung’s hair. Jisung whines around his quickly hardening cock and Minho moans as it vibrates along his sensitive skin.
“Fuck—Jisung-ah, what did you have in mind?” he asks under his breath, his hips twitching as he fights the urge to fuck into him. Jisung looks up at him through his lashes, eyes so round and beautiful, the sight so hot.
“Hmm, I don't mind anything. Do you want to switch positions, hyung?” Jisung pulls off but keeps his lips at the red tip of Minho’s leaking cock. Minho hums and mindlessly caresses Jisung’s head.
“Should I ride you?” he suggests with a little smirk and Jisung’s eyes widen. He opens his mouth to speak, but no sound comes out, so he simply nods with an eager expression.
Minho lays down on his stomach to let Jisung open him up, but he feels a little too vulnerable in this position. Facing Jisung might be even worse, though, so he bites through the weird churning of his stomach and tells himself that he trusts Jisung and that this is no big deal.
“Hyung-ah, please relax,” Jisung softly whispers as he caresses Minho’s back with a gentle hand, circling his rim with a lubed up finger. Minho takes a deep breath and reminds himself that he has done this before, but somehow it's scary to be so vulnerable with Jisung, he might notice Minho’s feelings, after all.
“Thank you hyung,” Jisung says as he slowly works his finger inside. His free hand sneaks up to Minho’s chest, stimulating his nipples to help him relax, and Minho sighs in pleasure.
Jisung knows how to finger someone, and Minho soon finds himself melting into the sheets and allowing Jisung to do his thing. Jisung finds his prostate pretty easily, and Minho flushes red as a moan slips from his lips.
“Hyung, hyung-ah, can I add another one?” Jisung asks softly, and Minho hums, a small smile growing on his face in fondness at the polite question. It's kind of nice to have Jisung take care of him like this, and Jisung’s fingers feel better than his own, but Minho also wants him to hurry up already so that he can take over and give Jisung a little show in return.
He feels like he needs to be in control so that he doesn't accidentally show a glimpse of his feelings, so even though he really likes this, he's growing a bit impatient.
Jisung adds a third finger when Minho tells him to do so, and Minho’s patience is wearing thinner by the second, so once he's ready, he tells Jisung to stop and he turns around.
“My turn, princess,” Minho tells him with a chuckle, and he winks before slowly pushing Jisung down on his back. Jisung watches him with wide eyes, but easily complies and he jerks himself off a bit with the leftover lube, his breath hitching and his eyes fluttering.
“Should I— oh —Should I do anything?” Jisung asks between breaths as Minho slathers some more lube on his hard cock, joining Jisung’s hand in jerking him off.
“You can try to meet my thrusts, if you want—I'm not too familiar with this either,” Minho answers, struggling to keep his composure as he teases his rim with the tip of Jisung’s cock. Jisung’s tongue comes out to wet his lips and he nods.
“We'll find out together, then,” Jisung replies, looking up at Minho with so much anticipation and arousal in his eyes that Minho can't help but shiver.
He steadies himself on Jisung’s chest as he lowers himself on Jisung’s thick cock. The stretch stings a little, but Minho strains his thighs to slow down and take his time, listening to Jisung’s hitching breath.
Jisung grabs Minho’s thighs, but Minho tells him to hold his hips. Jisung immediately does so, and he helps him slowly lower himself onto his hard and leaking cock—without a condom this time, because they've tested again and Minho promised next time.
Once Minho lets go and bottoms out, he groans at the feeling, because Jisung is quite big, and he's already grazing his prostate. He looks down to see Jisung biting his lower lip, head thrown back, and Minho can’t help but snicker a little.
“New feeling, huh?” he says as he rolls his hips a little, his stomach tightening in pleasure. Jisung muffles a whine.
“Y-Yeah. Feels nice,” he answers, squirming a little under Minho as his fingers dig into Minho’s hips. Jisung blinks up at him. “Do you like this, too?”
God. He’s so cute, Minho thinks as he fights the urge to lean down and connect their lips. He hums in answer and starts rolling his hips a little faster, getting ready to pick up the pace and ride Jisung properly. “Yeah, I like this. You're filling me up well, Jisungie, with your big cock.”
Jisung moans but it turns into an embarrassed laugh at Minho’s words. Minho smiles as he keeps rolling his hips, grinding on Jisung’s erection. He then raises himself and drops onto Jisung’s lap, bouncing on Jisung’s cock as he keeps himself steady with a hand on his friend’s chest.
Neither of them know where to keep their eyes, but the way Jisung looks up at him with blown pupils is a little too much to handle, so Minho decides to let his eyes fall shut, focusing on aiming his bounces so that Jisung hits his prostate.
It takes a moment before he finds a rhythm that works, but Jisung helps him by grinding up into him and holding his hips, his cock filling up Minho so well despite his slightly shaky movement. The sound of their skin slapping together, whiny breaths escaping their lips, and the feeling of Jisung inside him is getting to Minho’s head, making him feel cotton-brained and so so good.
“Fuck, Jisung-ah—God, you’re nice and big, doing well,” he praises him through pants full of arousal. Jisung’s cock fills him up so good, and Minho feels hot all over, as if his veins are on fire, his skin sensitive. Jisung whines and babbles something Minho doesn't quite register.
He opens his eyes in case what he said was important, but he accidentally meets Jisung’s gaze dead-on, his expression piercing his soul. He has the urge to tell Jisung just how much he likes him, how good he really makes Minho feel, but even if he wanted to, the words are caught in his throat, and his heart is pounding fast and heavy in his chest.
Jisung whimpers and bucks his hips up to meet Minho’s ass, coaxing a soft whine from Minho’s lips. “You too, hyung. D-Doing good, too,” he replies, eagerly encouraging Minho to keep bouncing on his dick. “ Oh gosh— You sure I shouldn’t take over?”
“Y-You want to try that?” Minho asks with a moan. He doesn’t want Jisung to do something just because he feels like he should, but if he wants something, then Minho will let him. Jisung nods, and while Minho is having a great time just riding him, he has always been bad at saying no to his best friend, and his legs wouldn't protest against a break.
Even though he doesn’t want to stop—wants to keep feeling like this—he slowly gets off Jisung’s lap, letting out a breath of discontent when Jisung’s hard cock slips out of him. He starts getting on all fours, but he hesitates—he doesn’t really like this position, and Jisung also pauses.
“Uhm, can you lay on your back, maybe? I—I wanna see your face, hyung-ah,” Jisung requests softly, and Minho’s heart flutters. He almost believes that Jisung actually wants to be face to face with him, but then he adds, “Because I want to, uhm, see if I’m doing okay, you know?”
“Sure.” Minho complies, his heart squeezing in disappointment, and he turns around to lie on his back, shoves a pillow under his lower back and tries not to look into Jisung’s eyes too much. This position is way more intimate than Minho simply being on top of him, and their faces are way closer.
Jisung slowly pushes inside again, leaning over Minho on his hands, giving Minho the perfect view of the way his eyes roll back and his eyelids flutter. Minho sighs in relief as Jisung’s cock presses against his prostate again and he reaches out to grab Jisung’s butt to distract himself from their proximity. His stomach tightens and he arches his back to let Jisung enter him deeper.
Jisung starts thrusting, but he leans onto his elbows and brings his face even closer to Minho, their noses almost touching. Minho’s breath hitches—This is not how they’re supposed to be doing this. Minho is not supposed to feel his heart beating in his ears like this, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips as he fights the mush of arousal that is his brain to make sure that he doesn’t kiss Jisung absolutely silly right now.
They’re too close, and Minho is afraid that he’ll lose control, that he’ll give himself away if Jisung looks at his face when he’s so near.
“Hyung,” Jisung breathes against his cheek, and Minho tenses up a little, but while doing that, Jisung flinches and moans while hiding his face in the crook of Minho’s neck. Minho shivers and his heart is pounding faster and faster—he’s falling deeper and deeper.
He feels Jisung’s lips on his neck as the younger keeps feverishly thrusting into Minho, nibbling on his skin and behind his ear. The pleasure and urge to kiss Jisung mix into a bittersweet soup in Minho’s stomach. Slowly, Jisung kisses his way up Minho’s jaw, and a little more slowly, Minho turns his face away from him.
But Jisung keeps going.
His lips brush Minho’s cheek, his face twitching as he pistons into Minho, his heavy breaths hitting Minho’s skin. Minho is starting to feel hotter by the second, but he isn’t sure if he likes it as much as he should. He can’t focus, arousal fighting with weird feelings of fear.
“Hyung-ah. Minho-hyung.” Jisung seems to be even further gone than Minho is, mindlessly chanting his name and brushing his nose dangerously close to Minho’s lips. They can’t kiss, they can’t, they shouldn’t, no matter how badly Minho wants to.
He is starting to feel a bit suffocated— powerless— underneath Jisung, and he threads his fingers into his friend’s hair. It feels so good but it feels bad. He doesn’t like the way he can’t move, and even though he trusts Jisung with his life, he feels too vulnerable to be able to enjoy this to its fullest right now, especially since Jisung is leaning down.
His lips brush Minho’s ever so slightly, but Minho tightens his grip on Jisung’s hair. He feels too powerless.
“Jisung—Jisung-ah,” he pleads, just in time to stop Jisung from kissing his lips, still in disbelief that he actually wants to do that. Jisung frowns and puts some distance between them, slowing down the movement of his hips. “I—I don’t like this position.”
“W-What? Oh—” Jisung stops immediately and his eyes widen in shock. Minho can already see the apologies coming. “Sorry, oh my gosh, hyung—” They slip from his lips uncontrollably as Jisung backs away and puts some distance between them, but Minho shushes him and sits up to grab Jisung’s face, willing his frantically beating heart to calm down.
“No, no, it’s not your fault. Listen to me,” he gently tells him, his thumb caressing his cheek. He takes a deep but shaky breath and tries to find the words to explain himself. “You wanted to try it, I wanted you to do so too, but—I just… I can’t do this today. I don’t, uhm…”
Minho doesn’t know how to convey this feeling properly, without saying something that will make Jisung think that he doesn’t trust him, or that will give away his feelings. “It’s just the position. It's a bit too… stuffy for me. You were doing well.”
“Oh. Oh, okay,” Jisung says as he takes a deep breath before coming forward to wrap Minho into a hug. He holds Minho close to his chest, gently resting his cheek on his shoulder as he soothes him with a gentle hand. “Okay, thank you for telling me, hyung. I—I was actually feeling a little pressured to perform as well, so I’m glad you stopped us. I hope I didn’t make you too uncomfortable. I… I was a bit stuck in my head again.”
Minho hums and takes a moment to just exist in Jisung’s arms, letting his heart calm down and enjoying the warmth of his friend. He’s happy that Jisung is honest with him about this, and that Minho didn’t stop them while he was having the time of his life or anything. Jisung presses a soft kiss to the side of Minho’s head, and Minho lets out a breath.
“You didn’t make me uncomfortable, don’t worry. And I’m okay with finishing this as I ride you again, if you want,” he assures him as he rubs a hand along Jisung’s back, relieved that Jisung is taking this well, and that he cares about his comfort so much.
“Oh. Are you sure?” Jisung asks as he backs away a little, examining Minho’s face as he mindlessly caresses his shoulders with his thumbs. Minho nods, he doesn’t want this to become a stressful memory to Jisung, and even if his dick is softening a little, he can certainly go on and finish this.
“Okay, well, uhm, I’ve gotten soft because of the shock so you gotta rile me up again, hyung-ah,” Jisung replies with an awkward chuckle, his cheeks not losing their rosy color. Minho looks down and indeed sees that Jisung has gone soft again, so he snickers and gets his hand on Jisung’s dick.
“My prince needs me to touch his private parts, huh?” he teases, and Jisung huffs, his cheeks inflating adorably. Minho doesn’t waste any time and jerks him off well with the remaining lube on his cock, getting him to hardness surprisingly quickly.
The sight of Jisung’s cock in his hand gets Minho riled up as well, and he can’t wait to get it inside him again, but he takes his time to get them both aroused enough to continue. “He needs me to get him hard so I can sit on his cock again? Bounce on him until he cums?”
“Hyung, oh my god,” Jisung whines and giggles as he hides his face. He seems like he wants to reply, but instead, he puts his hands on Minho’s chest, squeezing his sensitive pecs and running his thumbs over Minho’s hardening nipples. Minho lets out a soft groan, pushing into his touch.
He then presses a brief kiss to the top of his head and pushes him to rest back against the headboard. He checks Jisung face before sinking down on his erection again, sighing in relief as he bottoms out and feels Jisung’s cock stretching him again.
He doesn’t waste much time before setting a pace, steadying himself on Jisung’s shoulders and dropping on his lap as if rent is due anytime, coaxing soft whines from Jisung’s lips. He feels the cotton-brain return, his mind filling with thoughts of Jisung, Jisung, Jisung. Inside him and around him, but it’s not enough.
Minho can freely admire Jisung’s fucked out expression, as the latter's eyes seem to close on their own, so he saves the sight in his mind before diving down to suck on Jisung’s neck, muffling his own moans. Jisung brings his hands to Minho’s ass, spreading his cheeks and doing his best to thrust upward into him, allowing him to go deeper and drive Minho insane with pleasure.
“Fucking hell, Jisung-ah—” Minho groans into Jisung’s ear, his whole body tingling and flushing, his head in the clouds. Jisung lets out a heavenly sound, and Minho’s cock twitches, already hard and leaking again.
“G-Gonna… Close, hyung-ah, 'm close,” Jisung chants as he bucks up his hips. Minho meets Jisung’s eyes, and he can’t hold back anymore.
Something snaps, hard, and he surges forward to capture Jisung’s lips in a searing hot kiss, immediately pushing his tongue between Jisung’s lips and licking into his mouth as if he’s starving. Jisung gasps and moans into the kiss, kissing back just as eagerly, but it soon becomes a mess of spit, tongue and teeth.
Minho groans and sucks on Jisung’s tongue. He feels Jisung shudder underneath him, his hips stutter, and suddenly he feels something warm fill him up—Jisung just came inside him. Holy fuck.
Minho bites on Jisung’s lower lip to muffle a loud guttural groan and he drops down onto Jisung’s lap two more well-aimed times as he takes Jisung’s hand to tug on his cock before he cums with a high pitched moan, his whole body seizing up as his orgasm is spurred on by Jisung’s sudden one.
He pants against Jisung’s lips as he slows down his movement, working both of them through it until they both shiver and start squirming.
They come down from their highs together, lips still not separating. They’re going on for too long—Minho knows it—but arousal still clouds his mind and judgement, and he can’t bring himself to stop kissing Jisung, the feeling of his soft lips against his own oh so addicting, and the way Jisung kisses him in return feels like a dream.
Jisung nibbles on Minho’s upper lip and Minho tugs him closer by the waist, but the longer they go on, the more Minho is starting to realize that he’s not dreaming, and that he shouldn’t be doing this.
“Okay, okay, holy fuck,” Jisung whispers, and those words manage to sober Minho up in an instant, so he back away and takes a moment to breathe. Jisung looks at him and chuckles. “That was… really good. Really hot, again. Thank you for still finishing with me, hyung.”
Minho’s stomach flutters, but his voice gets caught in his throat. “Of course,” he croaks out, his heart all the way up and pounding in his ears, but he needs to assure Jisung that he did well, too, because he did, and Minho had one of the best orgasms ever just now.
“No need to thank me, that was a pretty great fuck, certainly top two ever, just like the last one,” he blurts out, and Jisung starts giggling. Minho softens, his heart slowing down a little again. Seeing his smile will never fail to cheer him up. “Sorry for the interruption, by the way.”
“Nuh-uh-uh,” Jisung tuts and shushes him, pressing a finger against Minho’s lips. “As you said, top two fucks. At least, because I’ve only done this twice, still. It was great, Minho. Like, shit, I still feel really good.”
“Okay, okay, I get it,” he tells him with a giggle, waving his friend off. Jisung snickers as well, his eyes scrunching up as he looks at Minho with something in his eyes that makes Minho falter.
It’s probably the lingering high, but Jisung looks like he’s admiring Minho, fondness twinkling in his eyes. It makes him think about their kiss from just a bit earlier, but he shouldn’t. He should leave, take a shower and forget about that kiss as soon as possible.
“Okay, I’m gonna call dibs on the shower first, because, uhm, I gotta clean my ass,” Minho tells him. Jisung cackles and nods before grabbing a tissue from his nightstand to help Minho out a bit. Minho once again fights the urge to kiss him silly, but instead of it getting easier to ignore, it’s getting more and more difficult.
He almost collapses once he’s in the shower, his muscles suddenly giving out. Riding Jisung wasn’t only physically straining, but also mentally taxing. It was way more intimate than he anticipated, and he’s not used to having to deal with such overwhelming feelings.
He leans his forehead against the tiles of the shower and wills his body to stay strong for a little longer, and his heart to keep it together, as he lets the water wash away the sweat and grime from earlier.
He should put a stop to this, but he doesn’t know if he’s strong enough to do so. Because that means he would need to disappoint Jisung, either by confessing his feelings or by making up a lie that will make him think that Minho doesn’t like him enough.
Either way, change needs to happen.
༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙ ⊹ ⊹༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙
Minho might have an idea. He wants to call off the arrangement but he doesn’t want Jisung to be hurt, but if he makes sure that Jisung quits his job and loses his excuse to need relief after stressful weeks, then Minho can bring that up and tell him that they can stop and that Jisung can start focusing on finding someone else.
It’s a genius plan, but the only thing Minho needs to do is continue until Jisung actually quits and finds another job. That doesn’t mean he can’t poke a little and see how much progress he’s making. He makes sure that he asks Jisung during the weekend, though, after dance practice.
“So, how’s the job hunt going?” Minho asks after his shower, plopping down on the floor next to Jisung, where the latter is drawing at the coffee table. Minho still doesn’t understand how he can enjoy sitting on the floor like this, but it’s adorable. He’s drawing cute characters, his art style just as expressive as he is.
“Oh, hi Minho,” Jisung says with a little smile. He then shrugs and looks back at his piece of paper. “It’s going. How was dance practice?”
“It was cool. I can do a split now. Hyunjin can too, but I do it better. He was also asking if we’d wanna meet up with everyone in a week or two,” Minho tells him, mindlessly bumping their shoulders together. He wants to continue about the job hunting, but Jisung pauses and turns to look at Minho.
“You can do a split and you’re not showing me? Hyung!” The man pushes against his shoulder and turns to face him with a cheeky smile. Minho barks out a laugh and stretches his muscles a little before slowly easing himself into a split.
It’s not perfect because he exercised recently, but Jisung’s eyes widen and he claps in excitement. “Minho-yah! Oh my gosh! You should teach me that too, it could come in handy with our little thing you know?” he says as he gives Minho a bright smile.
Minho bursts out laughing. “You should practice on your own, ‘Sungie. Every day a little and you’ll be able to do it,” he replies, and he tries not to imagine what Jisung means by that it would come in handy for their little thing.
“But back to you. Did you find anything that allows you to dig in the dirt, perhaps?” Minho changes the subject again, because he needs to know how long he has to work hard to hide his feelings still. And he wants Jisung to be the happiest he can.
“Oh, uhm, yeah. I did, but I’m still waiting for a response. It’s okay, though. I’m holding up well thanks to you,” Jisung replies with a shrug, a kind of bashful smile growing on his face.
Oh no. He doesn’t want Jisung to start relying on him or their relaxation sessions either. He wants this to stop, but Jisung obviously likes it—he might be anxious to start dating around and hookups certainly aren’t his thing, but Minho can’t wait until Jisung has a boyfriend before they stop. He won’t survive.
“Yeah. That’s good. I hope they reply, though. It would be nice if you could finally do something that makes you happy,” he adds, and Jisung nods with a little smile. “You are always so excited to get all dirty and dig in the earth. Well—until you encounter too many bugs.”
“Yeah, thank you, hyung-ah.” He laughs and bumps their shoulders together and goes back to drawing. Minho doesn’t know if he got somewhere with this conversation, but it’s okay. “Oh, and by the way, you know I’m free every weekend so you can tell our friends we can meet up in a week or two if you can too.”
“Okay, will do, you spoiled little man,” Minho says with a chuckle and he pats his sweats to look for his phone. Jisung softly slaps his arm, complaining about the height joke, but Minho just snickers and texts their friends.
Hopefully Jisung can find a new job before that happens, because then at least they’ll be able to bring some happy and distracting news to their friends when they meet up.
(And hopefully Minho won't stress himself out too much about this, because Jisung can handle himself just fine, and Minho doesn't need to micromanage, however much he cares about him.)
And Jisung said that he’s holding up well, but Minho doesn't believe that he likes his job or that they're treating him any better than they were before his and Minho’s road trip. Jisung goes to sleep earlier than Minho, and he's been anxiously playing with his phone throughout the day.
Minho wants to take him into his arms and soothe him just like Jisung did with him the other day, after Minho told him that he didn’t like the position. Thinking about that moment makes him think about kissing Jisung, though, and Minho’s heart is still too fragile to deal with the memory.
He can’t get that moment out of his head, though. He fucked up. The exact reason he didn’t want to do missionary position with Jisung was because he felt like he wasn’t in control, like he was suffocated, and he was afraid Jisung would kiss him.
He doesn’t know how it’s any better now that he snapped and kissed him instead. He feels guilty, but for some reason he’s afraid to give up control and be vulnerable to such an extent, even if it’s with Jisung, a person he would give everything to.
He tells himself that it was mostly feeling a bit suffocated and stuffy underneath someone, rather than something else, though, but deep inside he knows that he’d probably be more okay with everything if he wasn’t worried about his feelings being laid out in the open, although it's most likely a combination of both feelings.
Jisung doesn’t seem to be onto anything yet, though, but despite him acting happy and joking around, Minho can tell that he’s not feeling great throughout the week. It might be partly because of the weather still being cold and quite dreary, but it’s not everything.
During one of their movie sessions, Jisung tucks himself completely under Minho’s arm, snuggling close under the blanket with Soonie on his lap, but thankfully not noticing Minho’s rapid heartbeat underneath his cheek.
Minho rubs a hand along Jisung’s arm, wondering if he should say something, ask how he’s doing, but he seemed fine during dinner. “Tired, ‘Sung-ah? Cold?” he asks and Jisung shrugs.
“A bit,” he admits, and he briefly looks up at Minho. Only then does Minho notice his red cheeks, freshly bitten lips, and slightly unfocused gaze. The expression makes Minho’s stomach flip and when he lets his eyes travel down to see Jisung squirming a little on the couch, his blood starts rushing south.
“Do you wanna tire out more together? Warm up a little?” Minho blurts out, immediately regretting the suggestion as soon as the words leave his mouth. He just can’t help it—the way Jisung affects him is too strong and his feelings for him make him do and say stupid things.
“Yeah. I could use a distraction,” Jisung answers with a soft chuckle. Minho’s hand comes to rest on Jisung’s thigh, and the younger one already shivers, ever so sensitive. Minho blushes when Jisung lets out a low breath.
He just wants to ask how Jisung wants to do this, but then the latter turns his body to face Minho, and he stuffs his hand between Minho’s legs. Minho gasps and his eyes flutter close as Jisung grabs his crotch through his pants, immediately scaring Soonie off his lap.
It seems like Jisung is eager, but Minho doesn’t think it’ll be good to go all the way tonight. They probably won’t even have the patience to do so, because Jisung is rubbing his cock through his pants like he’s got somewhere to be, looking up at Minho’s face with lidded eyes.
Minho doesn’t know how he does it, how he can look Minho in the face and keep it together, because Minho feels like he’s about to burst when he looks at Jisung’s red lips, his cock hardening frighteningly quickly under Jisung’s hand.
Jisung leans forward and parts his lips, but Minho dodges and latches onto Jisung’s neck instead, pulling him onto his lap by the hips. Jisung gasps and Minho moans against Jisung’s skin when he feels his rock hard cock against his stomach. He can’t believe Jisung is already this riled up without Minho having touched him at all.
Was he thinking about something while they were watching the show? Who was he thinking about? Was it inspired by one of their sessions? Minho himself can already fill up his fantasies with the handful of times they’ve gotten each other off, Jisung’s expressions and noises imprinted in his memory.
Minho parts from Jisung’s neck and uses the hands on Jisung’s hips to grind his ass against his crotch, his dick nudging between Jisung’s asscheeks through their sweats. Jisung is panting heavily and threads his fingers into Minho’s hair, nails slightly scratching his scalp. Minho shivers and bucks his hips up, eliciting a moan from both of them.
“Hyung-ah, I…” Jisung trails off and tightens his grip on Minho’s hair, making him look into his lidded eyes. Their gazes meet, and Jisung looks down at Minho with hungry yet soft eyes. Minho gets lost in them, and thus he isn’t fast enough to react when Jisung dives down and connects their lips.
Minho’s heart jumps up into his throat and he digs his fingers into Jisung’s hips when Jisung slips his tongue between Minho’s lips. Now that they’ve started, Minho can’t stop him anymore. He pushes their crotches together, grinding up into Jisung’s ass as they make out, tongues tangling.
They drink up each other’s breathy moans, dry humping as if they’re teenagers again, but instead of being inexperienced they’re just tired adults who might not need much more to get off than this. Jisung said that he had trouble getting off on his own, though, so Minho parts a little and spits in his hand before sneaking it past his waistband.
Jisung keens and arches his back into Minho’s touch. He’s surprisingly quiet tonight. Sometimes they’re way louder, joking around and perhaps trying out some dirty talk, but tonight is one of those nights they’re both quiet and this is just a way to get the edge off, to release stress from whatever they’ve been thinking about throughout the week.
Jisung grinds up into Minho’s hand, simultaneously dragging his ass over Minho’s hard and leaking cock, fingers still tangled in Minho’s hair. Jisung drags his nose along Minho’s hot cheek, heavy breaths hitting Minho’s lips. Arousal pools hot in Minho’s stomach, and he groans when Jisung pulls both of their sweats and underwear down so that they're skin to skin.
Minho puts one hand on Jisung’s naked butt and squeezes, his other hand still relentlessly jerking him off. Jisung tugs on Minho’s hair and pushes himself against him, letting out puffs of needy breaths. Minho’s mind spins, and he desperately grinds up in between Jisung’s asscheeks, his cock twitching every time Jisung pulls on his strands.
And just when he thinks he’s glad that Jisung isn’t kissing him anymore, his friend presses his lips against Minho’s in another hungry kiss. They’re both already pretty far gone, so the kiss is barely more than just them panting into each other’s mouth, but it still manages to affect Minho more than he’d like it to.
Jisung whines low around Minho's tongue and bites his lower lip as he shudders, hips stuttering. He lets out a soft moan and cums all over Minho’s hand. Minho slows down his movement, and he gets the sudden urge to lick Jisung’s cum off his hand, but maybe that’s too weird—too intimate?
But then again, is it more intimate than kissing during sex? Minho can’t even think straight anymore, so he brings his hand to his lips and licks it, his eyes flicking up to look at Jisung’s face as he cleans up his hand.
Jisung simply moans at the sight, loudly. Minho can’t help but be relieved at that reaction, and he barely even processes the taste, too aroused to care. He’s still hard and leaking, but Jisung suddenly gets off of Minho’s lap, tugging his pants up. For a split second, Minho fears that he’s going to leave him hanging, but then Jisung does something that almost makes Minho cum on the spot.
He gets on his knees in front of him, and looks up at Minho with wide eyes before requesting, “Can I suck you off, hyung-ah?” with a low and slightly rough voice. Minho quickly nods, and he puts his hands into Jisung’s hair.
“Yes, fuck—yes,” he says through soft pants.
Jisung leans over his lap and starts by giving the tip of Minho’s cock little kitten licks, licking up the beads of precum continuously leaking from him. Jisung alternates his gaze from Minho’s crotch to Minho’s flushed face, and Minho wonders how long he’ll be able to hold himself from cumming.
He tries not to imagine what it would look like if Minho would snap right now and dirty Jisung’s face and cheeks with his cum, but Jisung already starts suckling on the tip, causing the coil in Minho’s stomach to tighten, but he doesn’t want to finish so soon already.
He tugs on Jisung’s hair, willing him to go down on him a little more before he orgasms. Jisung breathes in through his nose and hums around Minho’s cock, looking up at Minho as if he’s the one getting sucked off. Jisung moans when Minho pulls on his hair again, and Minho gasps at the way the moan sends vibrations through his lower body, bucking his hips up in surprise.
Jisung squeezes his eyes shut but he keeps going, slowly bobbing his head and pressing his tongue against the underside of his cock. Minho groans and throws his head back as the head of his cock hits the roof of Jisung’s mouth, but he keeps looking down to see Jisung’s big and round eyes.
“Shit—‘m close, ‘Sung-ah,” he says, panting and trying not to choke Jisung by fucking into his mouth too deeply—this is already pleasurable enough. Jisung uses his hands to cover where he can’t reach with his goddamn tight mouth, bringing Minho closer and closer to the edge.
He pulls at Jisung’s hair to get him to pull off, but it only makes Jisung whine around his cock more, the sound hitting just right, and Minho gasps. His orgasm overtakes him by surprise and his eyes roll back as he cums into Jisung’s mouth. No matter how hard he pulls, Jisung fights back and keeps sucking, swallowing everything he can take.
Some drips down Jisung’s chin, and Minho tries to keep his eyes open so he can see it, but waves of pleasure make it difficult and force his eyelids to flutter shut. He doesn’t know how Jisung keeps doing it—keeps making him feel so incredibly good.
“Good lord,” he says between heavy breaths, mindlessly carding his hand through Jisung’s hair as the boy swirls his tongue around his lips to lick up any dripping cum from his chin and lips. Minho doesn’t even think about it when he swipes his thumb along his jaw to help him, only realizing it when Jisung takes the finger into his mouth to lick it clean.
Minho shudders, his heart leaping up into his throat.
I love you.
The thought overwhelms Minho, crashes over him like a tsunami, slamming him down and taking him by force. The words are on the tip of Minho’s tongue, but he can’t say it. He won’t. He can’t.
He loves Jisung more than anything, but Jisung doesn’t love him back—not in the same way. And that’s okay, but Minho feels like he’s fucking up their relationship by doing this.
What the fuck are we even doing? he wonders when he meets eyes with Jisung, both of their faces completely flushed, despite Jisung’s orgasm already being a while ago. He has been slacking way too much in terms of hiding his feelings and keeping things impersonal during sex.
From kissing to looking each other in the eyes, praising Jisung and caressing his head—Minho has been longing to do it all more and more, and outside of the bedroom it’s getting difficult to ignore everything as well.
And it hurts when Jisung leans down to kiss the top of Minho’s head and thank him before wiping at his lips and leaving for the bathroom. Minho almost grabs him by the wrist to pull him back onto his lap so that they can cuddle for the night, but he doesn’t.
Having cuddled right before their session just isn’t enough, and even though he knows that Jisung loves snuggling, it’s not something they do. They just have a thing, but they’re not a thing.
Sure, they’re a set, their friends agree, which is why they live together, but there are still things that are off-limits and will always be off-limits, no matter how badly Minho wants to love Jisung in every way he can. He doesn’t want to hold back anymore, but the thought of hurting Jisung in the process is worse than anything.
He closes his eyes and lets out a long sigh, finally tucking himself back into his pants. There’s a strange pressure against his chest as he hears the running water of the shower and imagines what Jisung would be thinking about right now. If he listens carefully, he can hear Jisung softly hum something.
A bittersweet smile grows on Minho’s face. He’s glad that Jisung is happy, blissfully oblivious of Minho’s inner turmoil. He’d like to keep it that way if he can.
That is, if his friends aren’t going to give them a hard time during their hangout. Jisung still hasn’t found a new job—or at least, he hasn’t told Minho about it—and Minho isn’t sure if he can keep it together, especially not with Felix there, who already knows about their arrangement.
Felix promised that he wouldn’t bring it up in front of Jisung, though, but Minho knows their friends just as well as they know him and Jisung, so there’s a good chance they’ll say something. Minho just hopes that Jisung is able to lie today.
Their hangouts are usually just them playing games, eating, and talking a lot, catching up on what everyone has been doing lately—Hyunjin has gotten a dance gig recently, Chan and Changbin tell them about a funny composition they made at ass o’clock at night, Felix has been getting kilograms of sugar and flour from his neighbors after bringing around cookies, Seungmin has been getting back into baseball because he needed a hobby and a way to get exercise, and Jeongin is looking into signing up for a singing job at the nurse home aside from his kindergarten teaching job.
After general catching up is done, everyone wants to know what Minho and Jisung have been up to on their road trip. Minho’s heart clenches in concern, but he schools his expression and tells them about all of the restaurants they’ve been, the pretty sceneries they’ve seen, the strange and kind people they’ve encountered, and the local things they’ve tried.
“Sounds like you two had a good time. Thank goodness, because we were concerned after your radio silence the week after you two got back,” Chan says with a chuckle. Seungmin laughs and shakes his head.
“He was ready to break down your door, you know? Thankfully Felix offered to just stop by normally, so crisis averted,” he adds, and Jisung laughs at the comment, cooing at their oldest friend. The smile makes Minho’s stomach flip and he can’t help but let his gaze linger for a moment.
“But, like, everything is okay between you two, right?” Jeongin then asks, squinting his eyes at the two of them. Jisung tilts his head at him.
“Huh? Yeah, of course. Why?” He seems confused, and Minho is grateful for it. Of course things are going well between them, that’s how Minho used to think as well, but he feels like he’s playing a dangerous game that could ruin that any second.
“I dunno. Radio silence isn’t unusual coming from you two, but this was kinda weird after your little getaway,” Jeongin explains with a shrug, but he looks between them with a slightly suspicious expression on his face.
“Oh, I guess we were just getting used to things after being away, you know? Didn’t have the mind to respond to everything,” Jisung explains. He’s not exactly lying, Minho knows that, but he and probably everyone else in the room can tell that he’s not telling them the whole truth.
“And what about that job hunt, Jisung-ah?” Changbin asks, thankfully changing the subject, but Jisung’s mouth twitches down into a scowl. The sour expression is gone as quickly as it came, and Minho looks around the room, but it seems like he was the only one who noticed it.
“Oh, it’s going… Uhm. Still, uhm, looking,” he stammers, trying to mask whatever he’s feeling with a shy smile, but now everyone can tell that something is up. Jisung quickly adds, “But Minho hyung has been helping me look for a job and apply. And, well, I’m holding up okay with the current one, too, so don’t worry.”
“But you’ve always wanted to do something with your degree, right? You should keep looking and do something nice for yourself,” Hyunjin adds, and Minho agrees with a hum.
“Exactly. You love digging in the dirt, and on our vacation when we passed by the river and went looking for shells or little fossils? You were so happy,” he comments, making sure to keep his voice gentle.
“Yeah. I should, I know…” Jisung presses his lips together and nods. He smiles at everyone in the group. “Thank you for looking out for me guys, but I’m really also holding up well lately.”
This is Jisung pleading with them to change the subject, and Minho wonders why he’s so stressed about this. He knows that Minho will always be there for him if he needs him. Jisung was there for him when he was struggling to set up his freelance programming business—he even helped Minho by spreading the word to his people at his college, despite his anxiety around strangers.
They’re always there for each other, and that fact is proven even further by their friends with benefits arrangement, because Minho feels safe with Jisung, knows that he’ll listen to him and respect his boundaries and wants, despite it being a purely sexual and platonic arrangement—something where romantic feelings aren’t supposed to play a role.
Their friends obviously notice something is up, but thankfully they are civil enough to not say anything about it. Chan and Changbin approach Jisung at some point, and Minho wants to join them and listen in, but Chan gives him a look that says that whatever they’re going to talk about is not for his ears.
And so, he leaves and chats with the others for a while. He can’t help but keep an eye on Jisung, though, and he is a little concerned about him. He doesn’t want Jisung to cling onto their arrangement forever, because it might end up hurting him.
But Minho just can’t say no to him.
When they arrive home and Minho wants to wind down for the night, Jisung crowds into his space and pushes him against the door, a glassy look in his eyes from which Minho can immediately tell that he wants something from him.
He doesn’t want him, though, just his dick, probably, and Minho will keep giving it to him if only Jisung looks at him with those darn gorgeous and pleading eyes of his. But when Jisung cups Minho’s face and slowly leans closer, Minho tilts his head to avoid his lips.
“Jisung-ah…” he says with a soft sigh, grabbing onto his hips and pushing him away to create some distance between them, trying to be at least a little strict with both of them.
“Sorry,” Jisung whispers, and he takes a step back, his fingers sliding down to his neck until his hands rest on his chest. Minho already feels bad for denying him, but Jisung looks up at him and gives him a small smile. “Not tonight?”
Minho’s heart clenches. He wants him so badly. Every night. Maybe they can just do this one more time. One last time to say goodbye, to give Minho something to mourn, to give Jisung what he wants until he finally gets that new job going.
“I know you have dance tomorrow, but I’m okay with being on the bottom. I really liked that. And I could ride you, you don’t have to do anything. Or we could do something simple like last time—But if you don’t want to, I’ll just have a shower and, uhm, try myself,” Jisung says with a chuckle, almost pleading. And god, Minho is a weak, weak man.
“Okay, yeah, that sounds good.” He holds up a metaphorical white flag, convinced so easily by Jisung’s simple arguments. He knows that Jisung would accept it if Minho says no. Minho is not the yes-man between the two, but when it comes to Jisung, Minho is just as bad, if not worse.
“You sure?” Jisung asks, his eyes growing wide, twinkling in excitement. Minho softens and nods, his heart pounding fast. Jisung leans in to kiss Minho’s jaw, pushing their bodies flush together.
Minho wonders just how much stress the job thing is giving Jisung, and why he isn’t talking to Minho about it. Maybe he talked to Chan and Changbin about it and this is Jisung’s way of simply getting rid of the leftover jitters of making a major decision.
“You okay, ‘Sung-ah?” he asks softly, making sure to check on him while he still has the mind to do so. Jisung nods as he softly nips just above Minho’s collarbone.
“Yeah, just… Just been getting in my head about the job applications,” he admits, briefly looking up into Minho’s eyes before slipping his hands under Minho’s shirt. Minho sighs and shivers at the slightly cold sensation.
“Okay. Okay, yeah, don’t worry too much. We’re all here for you,” he assures him. Jisung smiles and wraps his arms around Minho’s middle under his shirt, smiling up at him with his oh so adorable face.
“I know. And I love you,” Jisung replies in a whisper. Minho gasps, his heart going into overdrive. And I love you. I love you.
Jisung doesn’t mean to say I love you solely to Minho—He doesn’t mean it like that, and he’s obviously referring to all of their friends when he says this, not just him.
And yet it affects Minho like he means it. Jisung gently caresses his fingers along Minho’s sides, and Minho wants to lean down and kiss him more than anything.
Wants to say I love you too, more than you know. I love you so much.
But he doesn’t. And instead of kissing him, Minho tilts his head and sucks on the skin just below Jisung’s ear. Jisung takes in a sharp breath, and Minho can’t help but grin at the way he knows his sensitive spots already.
He doesn’t want to admit that he doesn’t want anyone else to see Jisung like this, doesn’t want anyone else to know where they should kiss or suck to make Jisung whine, doesn’t want anyone else to rile him up, because Minho knows him best.
“Oh, hyung…” Jisung sighs and lets Minho slot their legs together, their hips pressing against each other’s bulges. Minho keens as Jisung runs his hands along the sensitive skin of his chest, circling his nipples with the pads of his fingers.
“Ah, Jisung-ah—” He cuts himself off to grab at Jisung’s ass, grinding their crotches together. He’s not feeling too patient tonight, so he holds Jisung steady by his hips before hoisting him up into his arms and carrying him to the bedroom, making sure to lock out any cats.
“Oh, fuck, hyung.” Jisung gasps and holds on tight, still subtly rolling his hips down, both of their cocks filling up fast. Minho bumps the bedroom door open and almost falls over as Jisung keeps stimulating both his cock and his nipples, although it’s not by much.
He’s also panting in Minho’s ear, so Minho squeezes his ass. “Please throw me on the bed,” Jisung requests softly and Minho holds back a groan, waiting for Jisung to get his hands out of his shirt before taking a deep breath and throwing him onto the bed.
Jisung lets out a half-giggle half-moan as he lands, and Minho smiles to himself while grabbing the lube. “Do you like being manhandled, princess?” he asks and Jisung lets out a hum.
“Y-Yes,” Jisung answers with a bashful chuckle. He is undressing himself in the meantime, and Minho throws the bottle next to Jisung before taking off his shirt and kicking off his pants as well.
“Good thing I like picking you up and throwing you around,” he says with a grin before coming to the bed and booping Jisung’s nose, making the latter giggle as he lies down on his back.
They’re both left in their underwear, Jisung’s cock tenting the fabric and Minho’s tip peeking out from under the waistband. Jisung looks delicious, spread out for him on the bed, and Minho can’t wait to devour him one last time.
He kneels on the bed and leans over Jisung, the latter’s hands coming up to rest on the side of Minho’s neck. Jisung looks up at him with deep and dark eyes, a void for Minho to get lost in again and again. Jisung’s lips part and he tilts up his chin, their lips brushing together ever so slightly.
“H-How do you want it?” Minho asks him, delaying and hopefully preventing Jisung from kissing him too much. Jisung slumps and lets out a soft sigh.
“I don’t mind anything, hyung. You can choose,” he replies, and the way he crosses his legs around Minho’s hips to push their hips together makes Minho just want to eat him up. He wants to be inside him and take him apart, but it might be fun to drag it out and make Jisung ride him before he does so.
“What do you say about getting on my lap? I’ll take over if you get tired,” he whispers into Jisung’s ear, his own face hot as he thinks about it. Jisung whimpers and nods.
“Yes—Yes, that sounds good. That’ll be fun,” he answers, reaching in between their chests to tug at Minho’s cock through his underwear. Minho lets out a surprised moan, his eyes fluttering and his hips stuttering.
“Okay, I-I’ll open you up, then, princess,” he says before grabbing the lube. Jisung doesn’t stop jerking Minho off through his boxers, squeezing a little until Minho is leaking through his underwear.
He unfortunately has to let go when Minho lifts Jisung’s leg and starts kissing the inside of his thigh, resisting the urge to leave a mark. He mouths at Jisung’s balls and then his cock once he reaches his hips, and Jisung lets out soft whines, pushing his hips up into Minho’s face.
Jisung pushes his underwear down, silently urging Minho to get on with it, but the latter wants to kiss Jisung’s legs a little longer, licking down his pretty honey skin. In the meantime, he warms up some lube between his fingers and circles them around Jisung’s rim.
Jisung tenses up a little, so Minho leans down again to lick a thick stripe up Jisung’s cock, eliciting a soft moan from him. It relaxes him well enough for Minho to get his first finger in, spreading the lube and loosening Jisung up for him to take him.
“Hyung. Hyung-ah—” Jisung lets out a sigh and chases Minho’s finger, carding his hands through Minho’s hair and scratching his scalp in appreciation. Minho lets his eyes flutter shut and leans into the touch, blindly fingering Jisung open as shivers run down his spine at the nice sensation.
He hums in pleasure and sucks on the red tip of Jisung’s cock, enjoying Jisung’s soft whines as he rubs himself against the mattress and pushes another slick finger past Jisung’s rim. He’d love to tease Jisung for hours tonight, making him squirm on his fingers—maybe he could even come multiple times—but Minho decides to leave it. It would require too much communication and this is supposed to be the last time.
He slips a third finger in and keeps licking and sucking on Jisung’s cock like a lolly, the feeling of him between his lips heavy and comfortable somehow, and he kind of doesn’t want to stop sucking him off, but his cock is throbbing in his underwear and he’d love some relief.
Jisung pulls on his hair and Minho moans around him. Jisung gasps and yanks him back by the hair, making Minho wince because of the pain. “Ow.” He pulls a face at his friend, whose eyes grow wide as saucers.
“Oh fuck, sorry hyung! I—I just didn’t want to cum yet,” he says with an awkward chuckle, his already flushed cheeks growing even more red. Minho snickers and presses a kiss on Jisung’s hip-bone, still slowly fucking his fingers into him.
“Okay. Good. I’ll slow down a bit,” he replies, only slightly grazing Jisung’s prostate one more time before he starts avoiding it, just focusing on getting him loose. Jisung smiles and squirms a little, wiggling his hips to meet his thrusts.
“You don’t have to, I’m ready to sit on your cock, hyung. Want you to fill me up—Split me open,” he shamelessly comments, but his cheeks are still flaming, just like Minho’s ears and face, probably down to his chest as well.
“God, didn’t know you could dirty talk, ‘Sung-ah,” Minho says with a soft groan, his cock twitching in his underwear. He pulls out and finally frees his cock from the confines of his boxers, the hard length slapping against his stomach.
“That wasn’t even good. You’re way better at it,” Jisung replies, but instead of looking Minho in the eyes or even near his face, his gaze is pointed at his erection, pupils blown. Minho feels a bit shy under his gaze, but pride also swells in his chest because of the desire in his expression.
For a split-second, he believes that Jisung wants him just as badly as Minho wants him. But once again, it’s probably the arousal speaking. Minho knows he’s pretty hot after all.
“Well, I liked it. Now come sit on my cock, princess,” he tells him, and Jisung quickly gets up and crawls over to him. Minho sits against the headboard and invites Jisung onto his lap. Their eyes meet, both of their gazes full of arousal, and Minho sighs in pleasure when Jisung grinds a little against his neglected cock.
Minho grabs his hips to help Jisung steady himself even though the latter still has to lube up Minho’s dick. He hisses at the sudden friction, subtly bucking up into Jisung’s hand, but he’d rather Jisung sit on his cock already, so he pulls him closer.
“Come on,” he says with a soft sigh, and Jisung giggles. He sits up, one of his hands on Minho’s shoulder and the other on his cock, and circles the tip of Minho’s cock around his rim. They let out simultaneous moans when Jisung slowly sinks down on him, the tightness of Jisung’s walls bringing Minho some much-awaited pleasure.
Jisung lets out a long whine as he slowly bottoms out, and Minho groans, his cock twitching and throbbing inside him. He tightens his grip on Jisung’s hips for a moment before moving his hands to his ass cheeks, kneading the flesh and pulling them apart.
Jisung whimpers and leans his forehead against Minho’s, their noses brushing as the younger pants heavily. Minho can feel the heat radiating from their cheeks. He holds his breath and flicks his eyes between Jisung’s gaze and where their bodies are connected, a mix of hot arousal, butterflies, and slight concern swirling in his stomach. Jisung’s eyebrows twitch and Minho soothingly rubs his hand along his sides.
“You okay, love?” The words spill from his lips before he can catch them and stop himself, but his whole body flushes when he realizes what he just called Jisung.
But maybe Jisung didn’t hear him. Maybe he thinks Minho misspoke, maybe he thinks it's just like calling him princess.
“Y-Yeah, just getting used to it. I just—'m a little overwhelmed, but in a good way,” he whispers, and for some reason, Minho’s immediate reaction is to tilt his head up to brush their lips together. Perhaps it’s an attempt to soothe Jisung, or to distract them both from accidentally calling him love.
Jisung’s eyes flutter shut and he leans into the touch, connecting their lips—It's too easy when they're facing each other. Too tempting. Impossible to resist the urge to kiss him silly, especially since Jisung looks so good on his lap, so endearing and lovable.
The kiss starts off way too innocently, a simple but insistent press of lips, so Minho slips his tongue in between Jisung’s lips, eagerly licking into his mouth and squeezing his ass, bringing the mood back to horny after it got too vulnerable and… loving.
Jisung sucks on Minho’s tongue, his arms wrapped around Minho’s neck in a sort of embrace, making Minho feel a bit too hot for comfort, fire building up in his veins but having nowhere to go, nowhere to leave and threatening to boil Minho from the inside if he doesn’t do anything about it.
“Can you move?” Minho asks, only putting a mere centimeter between their lips. Jisung pants, his gaze flicking up from his lips to his eyes. He nods and circles his hips in a hesitant motion, his hands resting on the side of Minho’s neck.
Jisung raises his hips and starts grinding, leaning his nose against Minho’s cheek. Minho lets out a long sigh as Jisung slowly sets up a pace and starts bouncing on Minho’s cock, his hair flopping up and down as he lets out little puffs of breath. Minho spreads his cheeks for him, but doesn’t grind up to help him just yet, simply basks in the pleasure of Jisung’s walls tightening around him.
“Fuck,” Minho groans out when Jisung arches his back and slams down, throwing his head back in pleasure as his fingers press into the soft skin of Jisung’s ass. Jisung lets out a positively obscene moan when he finds the right angle for Minho to hit his prostate.
“Someone’s gotten a bit louder,” Minho notes with a soft snicker and Jisung hides his face in the crook of Minho’s neck, still relentlessly fucking himself on Minho’s cock, making Minho feel oh so good.
“Shut up,” Jisung whines as he hits Minho’s chest, still shielding his face from Minho’s view. He squeezes Minho’s pecs, but his position is a little awkward as he is leaning down, which makes him shaky in his movement.
Minho laughs and brings one hand up to tangle into Jisung’s hair, beginning to grind his hips into his hole. “Hey, don’t hide. I like hearing you,” he admits softly, but when Jisung straightens himself and looks at him, he can’t help but groan. He’s already sweating, bangs sticking to his forehead, but for some reason he looks hot like this.
“How do you do this, hyung? My thighs are burning already. I can’t—I can’t aim.” Jisung slumps a little, but keeps enthusiastically bouncing on Minho’s cock, his eyebrows knitted together in slight frustration. Minho has to admit that riding is quite tiring, but he thinks Jisung is doing well.
“It’s as you said, right? I guess my sexy dancer hips allow me to ride better.” Minho holds onto his hips with both hands now, helping him out and fucking up into him. They let out simultaneous moans at the change of angle and the change of pace. “God, you’re doing well, ‘Sung-ah. Fucking yourself well.”
“Hyung—oh fuck,” Jisung whines and squeezes Minho’s pecks again, sending a spike of pleasure down Minho’s spine. Minho doesn’t know if he wants to look down at the way his cock disappears into Jisung and Jisung’s red hard cock slaps against his stomach or if he wants to admire Jisung’s flushed face, long eyelashes fluttering, lips red and slick from making out and chewing on them.
Maybe he shouldn’t look at his lips, they look too delicious, and when his brain feels like a mushy soup, clouded with arousal, he becomes very bad at holding himself back. And when he meets eyes with Jisung, both of their gazes filled with desire, they crash their lips together once again, the kiss turning filthy and sloppy within seconds.
They suck, bite, and lick at each other’s lips, and Minho is barely able to focus on what he’s doing because of the way Jisung’s walls tighten around his cock as he bounces on his lap, sending sparks of pleasure through his veins, releasing the fire that was building inside him.
Minho slowly notices that Jisung is getting tired, though, his whimpers getting more and more breathy, pants getting heavier, so he parts for a moment, letting Jisung kiss his cheek and jaw as he catches his breath. “Should I take over, princess?”
“Y-Yeah, please, hyung-ah,” he says in between kisses along Minho’s jaw. Minho lifts Jisung’s hips and carefully lays him on his back on the comforter, leaning on his elbows before grabbing a pillow and putting it under Jisung’s lower back.
He should really turn Jisung around, because this position won’t be kind to him nor his heart, but Jisung holds him close, oblivious of the way Minho’s heart painfully hammers against his chest. Minho closes his eyes and slips back into him, immediately setting a decent pace and trying to get his heart to calm a little as he takes deep breaths.
The slick sound of their bodies connecting is getting to Minho’s head, arousal finally overtaking the bittersweet feelings of loving Jisung so much, but knowing that he doesn’t feel the same. But in the back of his mind, it feels wrong to just use Jisung for his pleasure.
However, focusing too much on Jisung will make him get lost in his feelings, but he doesn’t know which one is worse in the long run. He knows that the worst option is hurting or denying Jisung, so he hopes he can just get them to their highs without any events that will make it difficult for Minho to put a stop to their arrangement, but then Jisung makes the absolute worst request he could make.
“Hyung-ah,” he begins, already making Minho’s traiterous heart flutter. Jisung’s fingers tangle in Minho’s hair, and he slightly tugs at it, not quite enough to make Minho raise his head or open his eyes for more than a second, though. And then he says it, voice shaking a little, words shaking Minho a lot. “Kiss me again.”
Kiss me again.
Minho is a weak, weak man.
He keeps his eyes closed but for some reason he hits bulls-eye when he blindly surges upward to feverishly press their lips together into a hot and desperate kiss. At least Jisung can't see his face if they're kissing like this.
Jisung’s fingers tighten their grip on Minho’s hair, and they drink up each other’s moans. Minho feels himself getting closer and closer, and Jisung biting and licking into his mouth really helps get him riled up. He whimpers, aiming for Jisung’s prostate with every thrust now, his hips relentlessly pistoning into him as Jisung arches his back, allowing Minho to go even deeper.
He feels Jisung’s hand sneaking in between their bodies to tug at his cock, which probably means he’s close. Minho sighs in relief, because the coil in his stomach feels tight enough to burst just about any second now.
“‘M close,” he whispers against Jisung’s parted lips, panting into his mouth. The latter merely lets out a strangled moan and nods, nose brushing against Minho’s. By now, they’re too far gone to even kiss properly, and much to Minho’s surprise, Jisung is the one who cums first—toes curling and back arching off the bed as he tugs on Minho’s hair, letting out a sound that is like music to Minho’s ears.
He slows down a little and quickly opens his eyes, but Jisung breathily urges him to keep going. “Don’t stop— Minho hyung.” The sight of Jisung’s fucked out expression as well as him calling his name are enough for Minho to tense up and tip over the edge, too, groaning as he releases inside Jisung.
“Fuck, Jisung.” He buries his face into the space between Jisung’s neck and shoulder, fighting the urge to bite down on his skin. His vision blacks out for a moment, and his heart goes into overdrive, waves of pleasure crashing into him.
As his orgasm fades and he stills his hips, he slowly realizes what immense mess he just got himself into. This might have been the last time having sex with Jisung, but he shouldn’t have let himself go like this—making out with him multiple times, looking him in the eyes while fucking, and worst of all, calling him love.
And now his heart doesn’t want to let go, has latched on to Jisung, taken him as a prisoner, and refuses to release him. But he has to let him go. No matter how vulnerable he allowed himself to be. He has to put distance between them and make this stop, because he won’t be able to lie to himself or Jisung any longer.
“Shit, Minho hyung, that was…” Jisung trails off as he catches his breath, lying spread out on the bed. Minho slowly pulls out and grabs a tissue to clean some of the cum leaking from Jisung’s hole, unable to make eyecontact with him right now.
Silence stretches on for a while, but Minho can’t get himself to speak. His mind is racing but no coherent thoughts other than Jisung forming. There’s a lump in his throat, but he absolutely refuses to cry right now.
“Was it good?” Minho asks eventually, his voice sounding way too fragile, but he can probably blame it on the physical exertion. He finally gets the courage to look up at Jisung, and he lets out a breath of relief when he sees that his friend is simply looking up at the ceiling, cheeks flushed and chest rising and falling as he breathes.
“Yes. Yes, I… I think I will sleep like a baby later. I’m exhausted,” Jisung softly finishes after a pause. He looks at Minho and chuckles, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes—or maybe that's Minho projecting.
“Good, then I'll take a quick shower first. Make sure you clean well and stretch your legs a bit, okay? I don't want to hear you whining tomorrow,” Minho says with an attempt at a stern expression. Jisung giggles and makes some incoherent noises as he waves Minho off.
Minho leaves him with a bittersweet taste in his mouth, but he washes most of that feeling away in the shower, making sure to keep it brief so that Jisung doesn't have to wait for too long. He puts off thinking about how he'll approach calling off the arrangement for later, and now he tries to let himself bask in the afterglow of the sex.
He finds Jisung fast asleep on his bed when he comes to tell him that he can use the bathroom, his cheek squished against his arm. Minho scoffs, his heart pathetically swelling at the sight.
“Hey, sleepyhead, you gotta wash up and stretch, otherwise you will regret it,” Minho softly tells him, gently shaking Jisung’s shoulder. Jisung flinches and lets out a groan and groggily blinks his eyes open. “I don't know what dried cum in your ass feels like, but I can't imagine it'll be nice. I know your muscles will ache like fuck if you don't stretch, though.”
“Mmhhm, yeah yeah. I know. You go sleep, hyung, don't worry about me,” Jisung absentmindedly replies, rubbing his eyes with the back of his fingers. Minho laughs and waits for Jisung to stand up before slapping his butt, making Jisung yelp and hopefully waking him up a bit more.
“Okay, sleep tight,” he says with an apologetic pat on his back.
“Good night, Minho-ring~” Jisung calls back, and Minho snickers before going to the living room to kiss his cats good night. After that, he finally crashes onto his bed.
Having feelings is exhausting.
Sex, too, although he had Jisung ride him for half the time. But worrying about his feelings is mentally draining. Loving Jisung, however, is as easy as breathing, and will never be tiring—hiding it is what costs so much.
He tucks himself in and banishes all thoughts from his mind. He lets the sound of the running water lull him into a half-sleep, his consciousness slowly drifting away.
The water stops, and Minho’s thoughts grow incoherent as he falls deeper and deeper into unconsciousness. He barely processes the sound of his bedroom door opening, the gentle footsteps on the carpet and the soft rustling of the sheets.
“Hyung? Are you still awake?” It’s Jisung, voice low and gentle. It's nice. Perhaps he's next to him, perhaps he's talking to him in his dreams. Minho lets out noise of content. “Okay, I don't know what that means, but I just wanted to, uhm… I realized I forgot to thank you,” Jisung says, but the words don't process, only the warmth of his presence, and the gentle sound of his voice. “You always take good care of me, and I never feel like I show you how much I appreciate it. And I don't say it enough, but I love you. I really do. So, uhm, yeah. I hope you know. Thank you for tonight.”
There’s a warm and soft sensation against Minho’s cheek, and his skin heats up in response. Then, rustling, before a cold spot is left next to him, but a warm feeling is left in his heart, even though his mind will not remember.
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Minho is not really doing well. Jisung, however, seems to not be off any better. Which is why Minho has been hyping himself up all week to confront Jisung about his situation.
He has been dropping hints, but Jisung still doesn't seem to want to talk about changing jobs. Minho doesn't press, at least, not until the weekend arrives.
His hands feel weird and his chest feels tight all morning, while he makes breakfast and waits for Jisung to wake up. He can't bring himself to eat, and he doesn't know why he's so nervous, because this is for Jisung, to make sure he's happy.
When Jisung is finally awake, Minho can’t bring himself to immediately start talking. Jisung is silently and obliviously eating away, but at some point, he does notice Minho’s off mood—because how could he not? They can read each other like a book.
“Why aren’t you eating, hyung?” Jisung asks, cheeks filled with food. He looks way too endearing, which is bad since Minho already feels antsy as heck.
“You need a new job, Jisung-ah. Like, yesterday. Or right now. And you’ve been looking for a job for a while so I’m sure there’s something,” he blurts out. Jisung freezes and almost drops his chopsticks, his eyes growing a little wider.
“Wh… Now?” He swallows his food and vaguely gestures around as he blinks at Minho in surprise. Minho lets out a breath and shakes his head.
“Not now now, but like… You should really quit, and I feel like you’re not taking it seriously enough,” he explains. Jisung’s mouth forms an ‘o’ and he gapes at him for a moment.
“I—I don’t—I, uhm… I am taking it seriously,” he stammers, but Minho can tell that he’s not telling the truth. And he doesn’t understand why he’s not. Why would he put this off so much?
“Then why don’t you have a job that makes you happy yet, ‘Sung-ah? Or at least a job that doesn't make you miserable?” Minho crosses his arms, ignoring the way his heart tugs when Jisung looks down at his fingers and bites his lip—obvious signs that he’s not entirely comfortable. But Minho needs to stand his ground on this one. It’s time that their friends with benefits era ends and that Jisung’s genuinely happy era begins.
“I—Because I’m doing pretty okay, hyung,” Jisung argues, his voice quite steady and firm, but Minho doesn’t believe him.
“You’re not. You slept like—what is it?—twelve hours today. You were tired after almost every day of working the past two weeks and now you’re telling me that you want to continue that blood-sucking boring job?” he retorts with a soft scoff. There’s only so many excuses Minho can take, even from Jisung. He just doesn’t understand why Jisung is avoiding this so much.
“O-Okay, well, maybe you’re right, but I’m looking for something else, okay?” Jisung avoids Minho’s gaze and fidgets with his fingers. Minho wants to reach out and hold his hand, but Jisung is too far from him across the table.
“I can help you, you know? But you’re not talking to me about it. I don’t get it,” he adds, hoping that it will help Jisung open up to him about this. Usually Jisung isn’t afraid to vent or ask Minho for help, but now he’s closing up, and Minho is starting to see himself in him.
Not in a good way.
“I know, hyung. And you are helping me. You’re the reason I’m not losing my mind about my job, so it’s all fine, okay?” Jisung insists, but however much Minho wants to drop the subject, he promised himself that he wouldn’t do that, so he’s going to press.
“I don’t believe you. Tell me about why you haven’t gotten a new job yet. Did no one respond?” Minho asks, trying to keep his voice gentle and patient, but Jisung has always been the more patient of the two. Right now, though, it seems like even he is losing his patience.
“Why do you even care so much, hyung? It’s in progress, okay?” Jisung deflects, once again avoiding the question and baffling Minho. He’s acting strange. Stranger than usual, and Minho feels like he can’t predict how he’s going to react, while he’s usually so good at that.
“What do you mean why do I even care? I’m your best friend, Jisung-ah. I want you to be happy,” he retorts with an exasperated sigh. “You’re acting weird.”
“ You’re acting weird, hyung! Why are you so insistent? It’s just a job.” Jisung argues back, his voice shaking and his eyes becoming a little glassy. Minho’s chest feels tight as he takes in Jisung’s accusatory tone, and for a moment, he’s at a loss for words.
“I literally just told you why. Why are you so insistent on not quitting?” Minho feels like he’s repeating his words over and over, those words bouncing off a wall around Jisung and not reaching his ears.
“I’m not insistent on not quitting, I’m just doing things at my own pace, okay? Just—Why do you feel like you need to control everything?” Jisung accuses him, his eyes venomous and his words feeling like a stab through the heart.
“I—I… I’m not—” Minho stammers, his face growing hot in both embarrassment and frustration. He clenches his fists and takes a deep breath. He doesn’t want to yell, but he feels like he’s wound up tight and he's about to burst. “I care about you, Jisung-ah! And you’re not listening to what I’m saying. You need a different job and we need to stop having sex.”
Jisung’s bottom lip starts wobbling and Minho sighs in exasperation. “Come on, don’t go crying on me now,” he tells him, way harsher than his usual tone, but he’s tired, he’s frustrated, he feels like throwing up and he doesn’t know how to handle a crying Jisung right now.
“I’m sorry. I just—I feel like you’re not listening to me. I—What if I’m fine with the way things are right now? Huh? Have you ever thought about that?” Jisung tells him, expression cold as stone as he wipes at his cheeks to stop the few tears that are rolling down his cheeks. Minho scoffs, an acidic feeling filling his chest.
“Really? You're fine with being miserable every day after work until you can blow off steam with me? What about doing what you love? And what about getting a boyfriend one day? You can’t keep doing this forever. We can’t keep doing this forever.” He stands up as well and gestures between them in a choppy movement.
“I know . I know that, but why do we need to rush everything? I said I’m fine,” Jisung stubbornly insists, and Minho scoffs, a bitter taste in his mouth.
“Fine with an awful job and fine with me as your personal stress-relief toy, huh?” He knows it’s not true, and yet he says it, knowing it will hurt. Maybe it hurts as much as Jisung dismissing him and how much he cares about him.
“Hyung! What are you even—? What the fuck is up with you?” Jisung whimpers and stands up, slamming his hands onto the table. He blinks rapidly, his eyes watering and speaks through sobs, “Y-You know that’s not true.”
“I know. I know you care about me,” Minho argues, his throat feeling tight and his head hot, but he tries to stay calm. On the outside, at least. And he can’t do that if he’s looking at Jisung, nor at the tears streaming down his face, so he averts his gaze, takes a deep breath, looks him straight into the eyes again and tells him, “because we’re friends, Jisung. We care about each other.”
“Yeah? Well maybe that’s the problem.” Jisung almost spits out the words through shaky sobs, and he pushes his plate towards Minho with a clatter before turning around and stomping away.
The door slams.
Minho’s heart cracks.
Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe the problem is that Minho cares too much. He never cares this much, and Jisung must have noticed it. Must have noticed his feelings. Must hate Minho for it.
He has finally fucked up.
And when Minho glances at the hallway to their bedrooms, he feels like bawling. His eyes feel hot and watery but he’s only going to get angrier if he starts crying now. The least he can do is leave Jisung alone for a while, though, so Minho makes up his mind and starts gathering some stuff.
Laptop, clothes, toothbrush, notebook, dance outfit—Where’s his damn charger? He thinks about texting Chan to ask if he could stay with him, but he doesn’t want to put him in the middle of this, so he texts a dancer friend who he knows usually isn’t home anyway.
Minho curses when he realizes his charger might be in Jisung’s room. Curse them for spending so much time in each other’s rooms. He bites the inside of his cheek and stomps towards the hallway, bag in hand.
He knocks on Jisung’s bedroom door, and doesn’t wait for an answer before calling out. “I need my charger!”
He hears noises coming from the room until the door is pulled open forcefully, showing Jisung with puffy eyes and messy hair, shoving the charger into Minho’s hands. He doesn’t immediately slam the door into Minho’s face again, which is nice.
“Thanks.” Minho says under his breath, and he shoves the charger into his bag, trying to ignore the soft sniffling coming from the person in front of him. It hurts to hear him cry, but hopefully Minho leaving will make things better.
“Wh—What are you doing?” Jisung asks, voice fragile and low. Minho shrugs, doesn’t feel strong enough to answer right now. He starts walking away, but the sound of footsteps behind him tell him that Jisung is following him. “H-Hyung. Where are you going?”
“Just somewhere. Leaving you alone,” he answers, tossing his bag towards the door before slipping on his shoes. Jisung’s heavy and shaky breathing makes his chest feel like it’s filled with acid, and he keeps his gaze fixed down on the floor, biting the inside of his cheek in an attempt to keep it together.
“B-But—” Jisung stammers as Minho tightens his laces and grabs his jacket. He doesn’t even bother putting it on yet. He turns his back on Jisung and opens the front door.
Jisung stomps his foot.
“Minho,” he pleads, but even if the way Jisung says his name hurts, he’s not stopping Minho. Minho pauses, but doesn’t turn around, and he waits—holding on to a tiny bit of hope that Jisung will pull him into a hug and tell him that he doesn't hate him, or that he doesn't want him to leave.
But Jisung stays destructively quiet, so Minho slams the door behind him before he hurts himself even more. He wants to cry, but he bites down on his lip until it stings and starts walking. He’ll cry when he’s alone and not outside.
He curses when his dancer friend texts him that he won’t be able to let him stay since there’s been a water leak in his house. Great. So far for being alone when he breaks down. No, I won’t cry. Not now.
He considers Chan again, or maybe Changbin, but he’s afraid that he’ll prevent Jisung from talking and venting to them, and he knows that Chan and Changbin will probably force Minho to solve this right away, so he doesn’t call them. He also knows that they will bring Jisung comfort, so he wants them to stay available for Jisung to call.
Hyunjin and Felix will probably feel too burdened if Minho calls them, and Jeongin probably has enough on his mind while he’s working part time on the weekend next to his teaching job. Seungmin is probably Minho’s best option by far, but Minho hates being vulnerable in front of every one of his friends. And especially Seungmin is difficult, since hewill probably scold him, but he has no other choice.
And thus he texts Seungmin to ask him, ‘Is your house free? I need a place to stay,’ and he starts walking to the busstop. He doesn’t want to take the car when he’s feeling like shit, and Seungmin lives close by, so it’s fine. Maybe he can clear his mind on this walk.
‘Yeah it is. Everything alright?’ Seungmin texts back, and Minho wonders if he should tell Seungmin the truth or not. He will, eventually, of course, but maybe not right now.
‘Can’t be at the apartment right now,’ he simply tells Seungmin, knowing that he won’t make a big deal out of things. The bus arrives, and Minho sits all the way in the back, leaning his head against the window and closing his eyes.
His phone buzzes. ‘Okay.’ It buzzes again. ‘And just in case… Does Jisung need a place to stay, too?’
Minho scoffs bitterly as he types out ‘No,’ but he has the feeling that Seungmin already saw that one coming. He’s going to ignore the way his stomach clenches and a wave of nausea washes over him, and takes a deep breath.
Just a little longer until he arrives. Then he can finally let go and let everything out. And thankfully, Seungmin doesn’t ask any questions when Minho steps into his apartment—this is why Minho loves him—but the reason he hates him will probably become clear soon as well.
Seungmin is too similar to him, knows how to read him frustratingly well, even without Minho wanting him to know what he feels, and it’ll probably come back to frustrate him immensely, but not now.
Now, Seungmin lets him into the house and to the guest room. “Yell if you need something,” he tells him before closing the door behind him. Minho sits on the bed and takes a couple of deep breaths, hoping that he doesn’t need to cry, but his heart is pounding heavily in his chest, and he can’t ignore the way his breathing grows more and more erratic.
After a moment he gives up, and he simply curls up on the bed, hides his face into a pillow, and cries. Cries and mourns the way he failed to keep his feelings hidden from Jisung, frustrates about the way he made him cry and probably made him feel disgusted.
The worst thing is that it all ended with a fight, but the only soothing thought is that it ended with him fighting to show Jisung that he cares. And if Jisung thinks that’s a problem, then Minho will have to make peace with it. He will need some time for that, but hopefully that time will allow Jisung to heal as well, and perhaps also forgive Minho.
Crying his eyes out sucks. Minho hates it, and his chest feels tight and painful for a while, head pounding, but after getting some water from the bathroom and gulping about two liters down, he feels… not entirely miserable anymore.
The memory of Jisung’s words and expression slowly fades to the back of his mind, and he notices that he's kind of starving. He isn't looking forward to facing Seungmin when he obviously looks like shit, but he’s got to eat.
Just like Jisung. Fuck, does Jisung have enough to eat? Will he be okay by himself? Thank goodness he knows how to cook and take care of Minho’s cats.
But will he be alone? Will he feel well enough to go out for groceries? Should Minho text their friends to go check on him? Should he check on him? He wants to, but he can’t bear to send his friends or him anything, his fingers unwilling to move.
“Hyung? Do you want lunch?” Seungmin calls out, and Minho takes a deep breath before gathering himself, running a hand through his hair, and stepping outside of the room.
“Lunch would be great,” Minho states, voice breaking midsentence, and he clears his throat before giving Seungmin a sheepish look. Seungmin pauses and looks Minho up and down, eyebrows raised.
“Okay.” He turns around again and walks away, granting Minho another moment of peace before he will inevitably ask how Minho is doing.
They sit down together at Seungmin’s dining table, quietly eating, but Seungmin keeps glancing at Minho, driving him up the wall with his concerned eyes and examining looks. “I know I look fabulous, Seungmin-ah,” he comments dryly before shoving more food into his mouth. God, he's hungry.
“Yeah, the red eyes and miserable expression look amazing on you, Minho hyung,” Seungmin responds just as dryly. “But I assume you know that you can tell me what fucked you up whenever you feel like it.”
“I know. Thanks,” Minho says, eyes flicking up at him. He swallows and opens his mouth to speak, but he can't get himself to form a coherent sentence. “And, uhm, Jisung… Can you, uhm…”
“I texted the others to go check on him, don't worry,” Seungmin assures him, waving a hand at him. Minho suddenly feels his eyes getting hot again, and he bites the inside of his mouth. Fuck. Don't cry, you wimp.
“How did you…?” He scoffs and swallows away the lump in his throat as he pushes at his food with his chopsticks.
“How did I know? Well, first you tell me that you can't be at the apartment, but Jisung isn't coming with you, and he doesn't need a place to stay, either. I doubt you'd come to my place first, because not only is Chan's place closer to yours, but he’s also the guy we'd all go to in times of crisis,” Seungmin begins, speaking calmly, which is nice. “Unless of course you want to make sure Chan is available to help someone else in a time of crisis. I haven't heard you utter a word about Jisung yet, and you two are never apart, especially not if you’re going through something—And don't tell me you're not both going through something, because you've obviously been crying. You of all people. I can only imagine Jisung feels equally shit.”
Minho is silent. This is exactly what he meant by Seungmin knowing him too well, but he’s also a bit taken aback by the way he speaks about his and Jisung’s relationship, assuming that they'd be together unless they both feel like shit because something happened between them.
That is how Minho would think, too, if he wasn't haunted by Jisung's words about how Minho’s feelings for him are the problem. They're always there for each other when one of them feels down—hell, that's how this whole shit show started, with Minho being there for Jisung when he was being overwhelmed by his job.
Jisung probably does feel like shit right now, though, and Minho knows that a friendship like they have isn’t broken in a day. He probably feels the void of Minho’s absence weighing on him, although he would probably feel worse if Minho would be next to him right now.
The whole situation still sucks major ass, but Seungmin’s words make Minho feel the slightest bit better. “Yeah, well… he was crying, too. You know how he is,” Minho replies with a bitter scoff. Seungmin raises an eyebrow at him.
“I do. And I gotta admit that I’m concerned for you two, but if you need some time to think before you tell me what’s going on, that’s fine. I’ll leave you alone. But if you need me to gather everyone or something, anything, say the word,” he tells him with a serious expression.
“Yeah, yeah. I know. Thanks, Seungmin-ah, but I kinda wanna take a walk and take a nap to get my mind off of things. I’m okay with getting some groceries and making dinner while I’m here, though,” Minho suggests with a soft sigh. The best way to not be miserable is to move on, usually. Talking to Jisung does wonders as well, but that’s obviously not possible right now.
“Only if you want, then I won’t say no to having a personal chef for a while. Cooking is boring anyway. Especially if I gotta do everything by myself,” Seungmin replies with a chuckle. Minho huffs and rolls his eyes.
“Okay, then I’ll be back in a bit,” he says, standing up and patting Seungmin’s head. “You’re still in charge of the dishes, though.”
“Ugh! I will never know peace,” Seungmin whines exaggeratedly, and it actually manages to make Minho laugh. He just hopes that Jisung has someone to lean on right now as well. He’s pretty sure that the moment their friend group hears about a fight between them, they’ll all come over as soon as they can, so he expects to see some of his other friends coming by Seungmin’s place in the near future as well.
In the meantime, he takes a long walk around the neighborhood—the weather is getting a little warmer, finally—does some grocery shopping, and distracts himself by taking his time when cooking up some dinner.
It feels good to share the meal with Seungmin, who eats it deliciously, but however much he tries to block the thoughts, he can’t help but think of Jisung in short spurts throughout the day. He’s still glad that he’s here with Seungmin and not alone in his dancer friend’s house, because this way at least he’s able to vent a little and share his food with someone, but it’s still different.
He receives some texts from his friends throughout the day, but he only looks at them at night. Maybe that was a bad idea, but especially the night feels lonely and cold without Jisung to give him a kiss on the cheek good night, or without cuddling up on the couch with him, watching something stupid or maybe not so stupid, feeding his cats together or letting Jisung cuddle with Soonie while he tries to keep Doongie and Dori on his own lap.
He wonders if Jisung is cuddling his cats right now, assuring them that Minho will be back soon. Hopefully. And he hopes his cats won’t get grumpy on Jisung, like they used to do when they first got to know him and were getting used to sharing Minho with someone.
His eyes are getting watery again, so he opens up his texts and reads them. From Felix, ‘Hope you are doing okay, hyung. I can bring by some sweets if you want, and if you need to talk or a hug, call me. I won’t tell anyone about the friends with benefits thing, by the way,’ and then a lot of heart stickers and cute emojis. Minho snickers and sends back, ‘You can bring the sweets and hugs to Jisungie and make me beef wellington <3. And thank you’.
From Jeongin he gets a similar text, except without the offer of skinship and the assurance of keeping his secret, and Hyunjin tells him that it’s okay if he skips dance practice tomorrow and that he should let himself cry it out, even if he hates crying. Changbin tells him that he’ll stop by tomorrow to give him a big fat hug, whether he wants it or not. Minho sighs and shakes his head at the sweet messages before he sends everyone a quick reply.
The last message he opens is Chan’s one, because he already saw the mention of Jisung’s name in the preview, and he’s nervous to see what he’ll say. It can either make him follow Hyunjin’s advice and cry, or it can make him feel better, but in the back of his mind he knows that the former option is way more likely.
‘Hey Minho, I’m at your apartment right now because of Seungmin’s text. He didn’t say why I should go, but since you’re not here and Jisung is not doing well I’m assuming you’re at Seungmin’s place. I’ll stay with Jisung for a while if you don’t mind, but I hope you’re holding up okay, because I can imagine that you’re not feeling great either.
I can imagine that you’re wondering how Jisung is doing, too. He didn’t want me to say your name, and he’s been crying a lot, but he’s doing a little better after eating something with me. He’s not talking yet, so I can only assume what happened, but if you need someone to be there when you two want to talk, I can be an impartial listener.
Jisung is holding up, but whatever happened between you two, you can only solve this by talking it out. Please consider doing that soon. I’ll send Jisung over when he’s ready, too. Stay strong, Minho-yah.’
A tear drops down Minho’s face when he finishes reading, not particularly because of the message, but because it hits him once again how things broke between him and Jisung. Jisung is not ready to face him, and Minho isn’t either, because that would mean really facing his feelings and also getting rejected, even if it means saving their friendship in the process.
But will it really save their friendship if Jisung knows that Minho has had feelings for him since long before they started their friends with benefits arrangement? Minho thinks he’d rather not see Jisung for a while instead of facing the hurt of rejection again, but then ten times worse—because maybe Jisung doesn’t want anything to do with him anymore.
But then again, he doesn’t know. And that’s frustrating. He doesn’t know how Jisung will take his feelings, while he usually knows him so well, and knows how to read him like a book.
He’s happy to know that Chan will stay with Jisung for a while, because Minho knows that Jisung can neglect himself if he feels stressed, anxious, or sad. Minho on the other hand, can overeat, especially if he’s alone—portioning for one person is hell—or he bottles up his feelings until he snaps at the nearest living thing for no reason, so he’s happy to have someone by his sight as well.
Minho takes a deep breath and wipes at his cheeks, his body fighting against the tears despite his mind wanting to get this acidic feeling out. He closes his eyes and squeezes before he tries typing out a reply.
‘Hey Chan hyung. Thanks for the text. I’m feeling like shit, still, but I can’t talk to him right now. I might do or say something stupid, and I kinda really need to gather my thoughts before I talk to him. Please take good care of him, though. I know you will,’ he sends, feeling like his thoughts are all over the place. His heart clenches as he sends one last text afterwards, ‘I don’t want him to be sad.’
He sighs before he turns off his phone and tosses it on the nightstand before turning around and tucking himself in. Finally he lets himself cry again, and he just hopes that this will be the last time.
༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙ ⊹ ⊹༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙
Minho skips dance practice after having stayed in bed for too long because he still feels exhausted. He’ll go for a jog instead, because even though he doesn’t feel like going out, he knows he’ll start hating himself if he doesn’t get some exercise or fresh air. His job doesn’t really force him to go out, after all.
Seungmin is still not forcing him to talk about what happened, which is nice, and he guesses the fact that he’s making them food is boosting his patience. And having stayed in bed means that the day seems to pass by way faster, but Minho still feels empty. He misses his cats and he misses Jisung.
Just when he wants to make dinner, though, Seungmin calls him and tells him that there’s someone here for him. Minho’s heart immediately jumps up into his throat, and he wonders who it could be—It can’t be Jisung, right? Jisung can’t possibly be ready to talk to him when it’s just been one and a half days.
Jisung always needs time after a fight. He knows that because he’s usually there when Jisung has fought with someone, making sure he’s okay and that he doesn’t get too worked up about everything.
But even if Jisung is here and ready to talk, Minho isn’t. He isn’t, plain and simple. He won’t be able to utter a coherent word if he sees Jisung right now, and he can’t promise that he won’t get angry or do something stupid in this mood.
But when he gathers his courage to step out of the guest room and face whoever’s at the front door, he is happily surprised. It’s not Jisung, but it’s Jeongin and Changbin, and most importantly, Minho smells his cats.
“Hey Minho hyung, we brought—” Jeongin begins, starting to lift a basket with two hands, but Minho interrupts him with a sharp gasp when he sees Soonie’s head stick out.
“ My babies! ” he exclaims as he runs up and grabs the basket before putting it down and welcoming his cats into his arms. “Oh my gosh I missed you so much, I’m sorry for leaving you without saying goodbye.”
“Hello, nice to see you too, Minho hyung,” Changbin says with a laugh, patting Minho’s shoulder as he and Jeongin walk into the apartment. Minho makes sure to kiss every one of his cats on their foreheads, ignoring his friends for a moment as he makes sure that they’re doing okay. “Jeonginnie brought your cats here, because, well, you know I’m afraid of them. And also allergic.”
“Can you believe he misses his cats after literally only one day but he doesn’t miss us after a whole entire month?” Jeongin shakes his head and gives Minho a disappointed look. Minho sighs, but his heart already feels a little lighter now that they’re here. He puts his cats down and look at his friends with a she
“Sorry guys, I’ll catch up with my precious kitty cats later and grant you my attention instead, don’t worry. So. Hi there,” he says with an attempt at a smile. Jeongin huffs and his eyes grow a little apologetic, and Changbin clicks his tongue before spreading his arms and pulling Minho into a big hug, squeezing him tight.
Minho groans but he wraps his arms around Changbin’s shoulders and hugs him back, just because he could use the affection, and he appreciates the moment of peace, squishing himself against Changbin’s soft body. Jeongin joins the hug as well, and even Seungmin does so, too, completing the group hug.
“Now I assume you two’d love to stay over for dinner, but I’ll make it for tonight, okay Minho hyung?” Seungmin says once they separate. Minho laughs and accepts the offer gladly, because now he has Jeongin, Changbin, and his cats to keep him company and to keep his mind from straying to depressing territory.
He makes sure that his cats go to the guest room while Changbin is here, promising them to come cuddle and play with them after dinner. They seem like they're well fed and content, so Minho feels at ease to leave them alone for a while.
“So, how did you get my cats here?” Minho asks his friends. Jeongin and Changbin share a look, and Minho only then realizes that they must've gotten Jisung to cooperate before taking the cats with them. A bittersweet taste fills his mouth, but he patiently waits for them to answer.
“Jisungie said that you needed them and asked us to bring them here,” Changbin explains with an awkward shrug. Minho’s stomach tightens and his heart clenches. Jisung said he needed them. So he still manages to read Minho’s mind and be attuned with his needs even when he's probably feeling like absolute ass.
“Channie hyung offered to come along instead of Binnie hyung, but, well, yeah, he has always been better at soothing and all that than the rest of us—although Changbin has a pretty nice and soothing body to hug—and Jisungie hyung still has to eat, so hyung stayed behind,” Jeongin adds, snickering as he tugs at his earlobe. Changbin elbows him and Jeongin presses his lips into a sheepish smile. “Sorry.”
Minho hums, and he's amused by his friends, but he can't get himself to smile. “Does Jisung—” he begins, but he bites his tongue and swallows the question of how Jisung is doing. They shouldn't talk about him. “Nevermind.”
“No Jisung talk?” Jeongin asks and Minho shakes his head. Not yet. Not if Seungmin isn't here. “Do you really not want to talk about what happened?”
“We can help you if you tell us something, you know?” Changbin adds, giving him a pointed look, and Minho lets out a huff.
“Okay, fine. But we'll do it at dinner, okay? When Kim Seungmin is here to hear it as well.” He relents, and Jeongin and Changbin accept it. They talk about some other things until Seungmin is ready and they can eat some dinner.
Minho still really doesn't want to tell them about their friends with benefits thing, but he might feel better not keeping everything inside. It's over anyway, so they can't tell him that they should stop.
“Okay, so, uhm, you know how Jisung and I went on a road trip to get him to relax because of his stupid job?” Minho begins slowly, stabbing his food with his chopsticks. His friends hum and give him curious looks.
“Wait, it started then already? This whole thing?” Jeongin asks and Minho hums. Seungmin nods, something like recognition in his eyes. That man is too clever.
“Yeah, well, that vacation helped him relax, but not in the way I intended initially. Because, uhm, we kinda got ourselves in this arrangement —Actually, uhm, technically Jisung sort of asked me to help him out, in a friends with benefits type of way, and, well, it kind of ran away from me,” Minho continues, keeping his expression cold to mask the sour taste in his mouth. Changbin chokes on his food while Jeongin and Seungmin frown at him.
“You—? Oh my goodness, hyung,” Changbin groans. Minho rolls his eyes and scoffs.
“Yes, I said yes, because what else was I supposed to do? Confess my fucking feelings and stress him out even more? It wasn't supposed to go on after the vacation. At least, that's not how I intended it to go,” he bites back, harsher than necessary, judging from Changbin’s surprised eyes. “Sorry.”
“Don't tell me you fought about sex, Minho hyung,” Jeongin tells him with a scowl, and Minho shakes his head.
“We didn't. It was about his job. We all told him to find something new two weeks ago, right? And he was all weird about it, right? I confronted him again, pressed him about why he hadn't quit, but he, like, completely shut down—shut me down,” he explains. “He told me things were fine, kept asking me why I cared so much even though I kept telling him that I cared about him. I don't know—He told me it was a problem that I care. He—He probably noticed my feelings, maybe it was the kissing in bed, maybe it was the way I insisted that I care about him. Fuck if I know. I left after he said that, because, fuck, I was only making him cry.”
Minho feels like acid is burning his veins all over again, remembering Jisung’s sharp words and eyes full of hurt. His heart clenches in regret because of the way he handled things, and the way he insulted Jisung by telling him that he only used Minho as his personal relief toy, but Minho is still unsure of what to think of Jisung’s words.
His friends stare at him and blink as if he’s speaking fluent English all of a sudden. “He said it was a problem that you care about him? I find that hard to believe,” Changbin says and Seungmin nods in agreement. Minho shrugs even though his heart stings.
“He said it was. He said 'Well maybe that's the problem' so I don't know what else to say,” he grumbles. His friends share confused looks, still unable to believe it. Minho wishes he didn't believe him either, but Jisung wouldn't say something like that, not even in the heat of the moment, right?
“I'm sure he meant something else, hyung. He loves you—” Jeongin tells him but Minho quickly shuts him off, almost slamming his hand down on the table and toppling over his plate.
“No, d-don't say that. He—He—” Minho’s heart goes into overdrive, his thoughts racing. Jisung loves me? Of course he does. No he can't. He has to. He doesn’t, not in a way that will save me. But he still loves me, right? Everything we've built hasn't been lost, right?
“Hey. Hey, hyung! Be calm, okay? If he didn’t explicitly reject you, and you didn't explicitly confess your feelings, you shouldn't jump to conclusions.” Changbin stands up and comes to wrap an arm around Minho's shoulder, rubbing his hand along Minho’s back and shoulder. Minho lets out a long sigh and closes his eyes, willing his frantically beating heart to calm down.
“I think he needs some time, Changbin hyung,” Seungmin softly comments. “But you're right. I hope you can find back some confidence in yourself and Jisung, Minho hyung.”
“Yeah,” Minho simply replies, and he feels another set of arms joining Changbin’s. He thinks he has never felt so wobbly and unstable before, but he knows that time will heal. Hopefully.
At least his cats will help him heal, so Minho spends the rest of the night cuddling with them, letting their purring soothe him, and letting their presence make him feel like he's at home. Their fur smells a little bit like Jisung, and the thought of his cats being there for Jisung as well is peaceful.
He thinks that he'll be able to live through the week now. His mind won't be at peace yet, but at least he thinks he's done crying for the most part. This is not the end.
And throughout the week, his friends come to visit one by one, each of them telling Minho the same thing. Jisung loves you, he can't have meant what he said, you two should talk, don't you miss him? He misses you.
And Minho does miss him, thinks about him all the time, and is happy that his friends have all visited him as well. Even Seungmin has gone by his apartment. Chan is the only one who hasn't physically checked up on Minho yet, only via text. Minho still appreciates it, though. He has his cats, but Jisung doesn't have anyone, and he shouldn't be alone right now.
And Minho wishes he could get over himself already and finally face him, but he's scared. He's scared to face the mess he left behind, scared to let Jisung see how much their fight messed with him, and scared to see how much Jisung is affected or not—both scenarios would hurt.
And so he lets the days go by, lets himself slowly deal with the situation, lets himself come to terms with the fact that his feelings are still not fading in the slightest, and tries to prepare himself to face both Jisung and himself.
Jisung texts him, 'Will you come back?', and Minho can't get himself to reply more than 'I will, after we talk'. Jisung reads it but doesn't reply, and Minho just hopes that he knows that he’s trying.
After a couple of weeks, Seungmin is starting to get impatient, and although he doesn't try to show Minho, he notices anyway. “I'll talk to him soon, okay, Seungmin-ah?”
“I know. But you really should, okay? Please do so. We all want you two to be happy. And although I like your food, you can't stay here forever, hyung.” Seungmin gives him a serious look and Minho sighs and nods his head. He’s going to do it soon. Before the week ends, hopefully, but definitely oncoming week, because it’s already Saturday.
“I will, I will—” he begins, but he is interrupted by a knock on the door. They both stop and turn around to look at the door. Another one of their friends stopping by? They haven’t really been coming by very often the past week, because it’s been a while since Minho left his home, but maybe they want to take advantage of having an excuse to have dinner with them again.
“I’ll get it,” Minho says, and he almost trips over Soonie, who snakes in between Minho’s legs to beat him to the door for some reason. Minho snickers and looks down at his precious cat as he reaches for the door to open it.
He pulls it open and wants to say a greeting, but it dies in his throat when he sees Chan standing in front of him. His eyes widen and his breath gets caught in his throat. He almost doesn’t dare to look at the figure he sees in the corners of his eyes, because if Chan is here, then there's only one person who could be next to him.
“Hi, Minho,” Chan says with a little awkward smile before bringing him into his arms for a brief hug. Minho tenses up, but he relaxes after a moment and sighs as he returns the embrace.
After they pull out of the hug, Chan steps aside and briefly greets Seungmin before stepping past Minho and leaving him to deal with Jisung, who is now standing in front of him, nervously shuffling on his feet.
“Hi, hyung,” he says softly, and Minho barely notices that he’s holding his breath.
“Hi, Jisung-ah,” he replies, his voice not more than a whisper. His breath hitches and his heart picks up the pace, his hands growing sweaty. Jisung looks… pretty okay. That's good.
Minho wants to say so many things, wants to ask him how he's doing, what he's been up to, if he hates Minho, if he moved on, if he's still hurt, if he missed him—and so much more—but he can't get himself to speak.
“Please—Uhm, please come in,” he stammers, barely able to hear himself with the way his heart is ramming in his ears. Soonie meows at his feet, and both of their tight expressions melt into a fond one.
He lets Jisung inside, and Seungmin and Chan subtly retreat to the kitchen, still in hearing distance. They sit down on Seungmin’s couch, Soonie and Dori joining them, while Doongie is somewhere exploring, probably.
“So, uhm, how have the cats been liking Seungmin and his apartment?” Jisung asks with an awkward chuckle, scratching at his leg. Minho reaches out to push his hand away in a reflex, but he quickly retracts it again, a blush creeping up his neck when he realizes what he's doing.
“They are okay with Seungminnie, but Seungminnie is more awkward with them,” Minho replies with a soft snicker. He then swallows and adds, “Thanks for making Jeonginnie and Changbinnie bring them over, by the way.”
Jisung’s eyes grow wide, and his cheeks go slightly pink. “Oh—They told you that I told them to do that? Well, it's the truth, so, uhm, you're welcome,” he stammers, and Minho can't help but watch him with fondness starting to grow in his chest. “I figured you needed them.”
“I did. I already missed them,” Minho responds, beckoning Dori over to sit in his lap. He caresses her as a bittersweet smile grows on his face. “I… I missed you too, is that stupid?”
Jisung takes in a sharp breath and pauses for a moment. “Y-You—? I-I missed you too, hyung-ah. A-A lot. Why would that be stupid?”
“Because I'm the one who left. I'm the one who is taking too long to gather myself and face you,” he says, looking up at Jisung with an apologetic look. Jisung scowls.
“Is that why you haven't come back yet, hyung?” he asks softly, his voice fragile, piercing right through Minho’s heart. Minho swallows thickly and nods.
“Yes,” he admits, although his pride hurts. He really wishes that he would have been the first to come back and fix things, but he was too scared.
“I… I'm the same, hyung. I needed time, although I missed you a lot. I… I only decided two hours ago that I would go today, but I really need to talk now, because, uhm… I start my new job on Monday and I need you by my side to ease my nerves.”
Minho freezes.
New job?
He looks at Jisung with wide eyes, the latter still fidgeting with his fingers and playing with the loose threads on his jeans. He got a new job. Got interviewed and got accepted all without Minho.
But now he needs him by his side to ease his nerves? Minho’s chest fills with a fluttery warmth of pride and fondness, but he's hesitant to let himself indulge yet.
“Minho hyung? Can you please say something?” Jisung asks softly, looking up at Minho with pleading eyes. Minho huffs, his stomach flipping in both nerves and fondness.
“Drop the formalities, Jisung-ah. I—I’m really proud of you. What—Uhm, what job did you get? How did the interview go? Do—Do you really need me?” He throws out the questions all at once, probably overwhelming Jisung a little, but Minho feels the same. He doesn’t know where to start.
“Ah. Thanks. I—I actually applied for this job pretty soon after we got back from our road trip. A paleontology thing—I can tell you the details later, but… I got the job after the first interview, even though I took a while to respond to their invitation. I’m really excited but also really nervous, so yeah. I need you,” Jisung admits, his eyes flicking between his lap and Minho’s face. “Sorry.”
“No, don’t say sorry,” Minho quickly assures him. He then bites his lip, wondering how he should start fixing this. Jisung took the first step, and now Minho needs to meet him in the middle, but he’s still hesitant. “I just—I need to know. Why did you—Do you really think I care too much?”
Jisung pauses and looks at Minho, a slight frown growing on his face. “What? What do you mean?” he asks, as if that wasn’t how their fight ended a couple of weeks ago.
“You told me that it was a problem that I care, remember? I told you we care about each other, and you said ‘well maybe that’s the problem’. Did you forget that?” The words you hurt me go unsaid, but Jisung can probably read it off his face, because his own expression grows sour.
“Oh. Oh no. I didn’t mean it like that! That’s not—You… You said—I-I love you more than anyone, Minho,” Jisung retorts, his eyes serious and his words making Minho feel slightly nauseous. Jisung shuffles closer, accidentally startling Soonie off his lap, but he continues to hesitantly reach out to grab Minho’s hand.
“Don’t use those words lightly, Jisung-ah,” Minho tells him sternly, his heart up in his throat, but Jisung shakes his head.
“I mean it. And I’m so sorry for hurting you, I swear I didn’t mean to make you think that you caring about me is a problem,” he assures him with a slightly desperate squeeze to his hand. Minho’s stomach flips.
“Then why did you say that?” he asks softly, and Jisung lets out a shaky breath. He’s just as nervous as Minho is, if not more, and he’s blinking a lot, obviously anxious to say what he really meant.
“Because—And I thought you left because you knew what I meant—I uhm… You said ‘we’re friends, we care about each other’ and I said that maybe that’s a problem because you said we’re friends, not because you said we care,” Jisung admits, speaking in a whisper as if he doesn’t want Minho to hear it. Minho doesn’t get it, though, because how would being friends be a problem—?
Wait.
His eyes grow wide and he looks at Jisung with nothing but disbelief in his eyes. “You don’t mean that in a way that you, uhm, like, have romantic feelings for me, right?” Minho awkwardly gestures between them, his heart skipping a beat.
“What? How else would I mean it? I thought you left because you were… uncomfortable with my feelings,” Jisung tells him, disbelief in his eyes as well. Minho snorts, but his heart is hammering at the speed of light.
“And I thought you noticed my feelings and that’s why you said they were a problem,” he explains, his ears growing hot and a faint buzz spreads across his skin. Jisung’s mouth falls open and he gapes at him, the corners of his lips twitching up into a little smile.
“Oh god. Oh my gosh. So we just majorly misunderstood each other?” Jisung says with a chuckle, cheeks entirely red. He then freezes and gives Minho a shocked look. “Wait—Wait so you have feelings for me, too?” he realizes belatedly and Minho laughs.
“Yes, Jisung-ah, for years, to be honest,” he admits, because he’s done with keeping it inside, and now that Jisung admitted that he feels the same, he suddenly feels like he’s eighty kilograms lighter.
“Years?” Jisung squeaks before slapping a hand in front of his mouth. Minho snickers and nods, fondly watching Jisung’s cheeks grow even redder, even though Minho’s face is flushed equally (if not more). “I mean—I… Me too— Why did we even—? How could we not have noticed this from each other?”
“ You were the one who wanted to be friends with benefits, my sweet Jisungie,” Minho points out as he boops Jisung’s nose, every little bit of anxiety fading away and being replaced by fondness now. Jisung sighs and rolls his eyes but his lips curl up into a smile.
“I’m sorry, Minho. I just—I didn’t want to ruin our road trip by confessing, and then I was having so much fun I didn’t want to stop. I-I—That’s also why I was trying to stall getting a new job. I didn’t want to stop our… our fun,” he explains with a sigh, chewing a bit on his lower lip, intertwining their still linked fingers.
“And I was trying to rush the new job so that we could stop and I didn’t have to deal with my feelings anymore—I thought I would make you uncomfortable if you noticed,” Minho admits in a whisper. Jisung takes in a breath and nods.
“You could never. I… You mean too much to me, Minho,” he tells him, eyes shining bright with sincerity, making Minho’s stomach fill with butterflies, his cheeks growing warm, his flush mirroring Jisung’s. “I’ve felt like this for you for so long, I don’t even remember what it feels like not to be in love with you. And these weeks I’ve missed you so much, I could only hope that you’d forgive me for my feelings, but looking back, I guess it was stupid that I didn’t trust you, because I know that you love me at least as much as you show and you love me at least as much as I feel loved by you. Whether that’s romantic or not. And—I know I’m rambling now, sorry, but I just like you so much it makes me want to write a twenty page letter—”
The longer Jisung keeps speaking, the more Minho’s heart threatens to jump out of his throat, and the more Minho’s eyes stray to his lips, red from being bitten in anxiety, looking very inviting. And so when Jisung keeps rambling, Minho decides it’s time to shut him up so that he doesn’t have to say something equally romantic back.
He rushes forward and presses their lips together into a desperate kiss. Jisung gasps, but holds Minho’s jaw with his free hand, Minho’s fingers resting on Jisung’s thigh. They keep the kiss relatively innocent compared to what they’re used to, but it’s just as passionate if not more.
It starts off frantic and a little messy, but once the initial spike of longing and adrenaline has faded, they allow themselves to slow down and kiss each other more gently. Jisung’s hand is cool against his hot cheek and his lips are soft against his own. They taste like chocolate, sweet like the feeling in Minho’s chest.
Minho tilts his head and Jisung presses closer, breathes out through his nose and keeps moving his lips against Minho’s. The world around them melts away as his senses are saturated by Jisung’s presence, his body heat, his scent, his soft skin and his gentle noises of content, and Minho brings his hand up to his waist, running his thumb along his side through his sweater.
He thinks he could spend hours like this, just innocently kissing Jisung and being close to him, and if the way Jisung’s breathing is getting heavier but he refuses to part is anything to go by, Jisung shares that sentiment with him. And it really feels like every one of Minho’s worries disappears—he can finally kiss Jisung and express his feelings without any restraints, without holding back, and without worrying about anything slipping through.
“I like you too, Jisung-ah, so much,” Minho whispers in the minimal space between them as they part for breath, both of their cheeks red and radiating heat. Jisung nods and steals another soft and brief kiss.
“C-Can we…? Will you be my boyfriend?” he asks, so gentle and polite, as if Minho isn’t absolutely crazy about him, as if he hasn’t been dreaming to call Jisung his for so long. He has been wanting him for years.
“Do you even have to ask?” he answers with a soft chuckle, but he can’t keep his eyes off Jisung’s lips for more than a second or two to check Jisung’s expression, only to feel shy because of his loving gaze. And Minho only realizes now that this look isn’t something new. Jisung has been giving him this expression for a while now, so he has probably felt the same for Minho for years as well.
“I guess not. Just wanted to say… I’m yours, Minho,” Jisung replies, brushing their noses together, and Minho rushes in to kiss him again. I’m yours. I’m yours. He’s mine and I’m his. The words fill Minho with so much love, his veins feeling like there’s electricity flowing through them.
He lets go of Jisung’s hand and instead cups his face, his fingers caressing Jisung’s soft and warm cheeks. Jisung leans into the touch, kissing him back like he’s at least as precious as Minho finds him. He hopes he can treasure Jisung without any boundaries now, because although he’ll probably need to get used to being unapologetically open in loving Jisung, he wants that so badly.
And if it wasn’t for the two of them getting hungry and a nice smell emanating from the kitchen distracting them, they could have gone on for hours longer. But alas, they part and have to acknowledge the world around them again.
They sit at the dinner table with equally rosy cheeks, embarrassed to face Seungmin and Chan, who regard them with unsubtle grins. Chan is the first to speak and acknowledge the situation.
“So, I assume your talk went well?” he asks with a chuckle. Jisung presses his lips together and gives Minho a fond look before he nods. “And I guess the kissing meant that you finally also confessed your feelings?”
Minho nods this time, his ears on fire, but his heart is at ease. Chan beams at them, eyes full of glee and fondness. Seungmin scoffs, but he smiles as well. “Thank goodness you did. But I gotta say, you two should have been honest from the start.”
“Oh shut up. It’s not that easy. We just need some practice,” Minho replies and waves Seungmin off. “I’d rather get the misunderstandings out of the way before we start dating and all, you know?”
“Yeah, it’s a learning experience,” Jisung agrees with a firm nod. “And, well, it got us all a little closer, right? Now we know that we can all overcome situations like this together.”
“Okay,” Seungmin says, and at the same time, Chan coos and says, “You’re right, Jisungie! I love you guys and I’m happy things turned out happy.”
Minho cackles and shakes his head, but he’s glad that Chan and Seungmin are supportive of them. He knows that the rest of their friends will be, too, which is a comforting thought.
After dinner, Minho takes everything back to his and Jisung’s apartment, with the help of Jisung, Chan, and Seungmin. It's weird to be back, and it kind of feels like coming home after a vacation—a vacation that makes you realize how much you miss home.
But he is happy to be back. Happy to have Jisung back by his side, and his cats are also happy to be home again.
They spend all night catching up on what they’ve been up to in the past weeks, and Jisung tells Minho all about the new job, how he’s excited to start but also nervous, how he hopes he hasn’t forgotten all his knowledge from college and how he hopes that his coworkers are nice.
Minho listens to him speak with a smile that doesn’t seem to fade, tells him to not worry about it and to just have fun, do what he loves, dig in the dirt and try not to eat any worms in the meantime. Jisung shrieks and hits Minho on the chest for bringing that idea into his head and Minho simply laughs until it turns into a tickle fight.
They roll around on the couch until they’re both tired and heaving. And when they meet eyes, Jisung beams at him, his gaze bright and full of fondness. Minho sneaks in a kiss onto his soft lips again, just because he can’t help it. Jisung plants a big fat smooch on Minho’s cheek in return, making him giggle, chest filling with a sweet and fond feeling.
“Come, you’re sleeping in my bed tonight,” Minho states as he wraps his arms around Jisung and lifts him up. Jisung squeaks and holds on to Minho’s shoulders tightly.
“Oh my god, Minho-yah!” he yells between laughs, his upper body flailing a bit in Minho’s grip, but Minho holds on tight and sneaks a slap on Jisung’s butt. Jisung slaps his shoulder in return and lets out a noise of complaint. “Don’t rile me up, hyung. I’m too tired.”
“Sorry, Jisungie,” he answers with a giggle, and once they reach the bathroom, he puts Jisung down and kisses him on the lips one more time in apology. Jisung melts into it, all of the fight in him disappearing immediately, and it’s almost like they never even fought at all.
Almost.
Because now it’s even better, and Minho can cuddle up with Jisung without worrying about his heartbeat giving him away. They get comfortable in each other’s arms and catch up on some lost affection, dozing off with warm cheeks and calm hearts.
༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙ ⊹ ⊹༝̩̩̥͙ ༓༝̩̩̥͙
Life gets a little bit hectic as Jisung gets used to his new job and they both get used to being an item. Apart from kissing more, nothing really changes much in the first few days, because as long as Jisung is getting used to his new job, Minho doesn’t want to take him out on a date yet—meaning, a date that is not their usual movie night.
But Jisung is happier, and Minho is too, just because he doesn’t have to spend hours of his days being concerned about him and his health anymore, doesn't have to worry about his own feelings anymore and because it’s nice to see Jisung come home with a smile, eager to tell Minho about his day.
It gives Minho more time to focus on himself as well, so he spends more time cooking and trying out new stuff now that he has more energy to exercise and dance, and he also starts doing these things together with Jisung.
“Surprise!”
Minho almost jumps from his chair when a pair of mud-covered hands appear in front of him, holding a couple of small and kind of dirty flowers. Minho turns around in his desk chair and looks up at Jisung, who is beaming down at him, a stripe of dried dirt on his forehead where he probably wiped his bangs away.
“I got these for you. They were next to the river we examined today, and things went more quickly than we anticipated, so I’m home early,” Jisung says with a bright smile. Minho’s stomach still flips when he sees that smile and he turns around to face his boyfriend.
“Thank you, my mud-monster. They’re pretty,” he answers as he affectionately punches Jisung in the chest. Jisung gasps and laughs before Minho beckons him to lean down so that they can give each other a kiss in greeting. “I’ll put these in a little bit of water, yeah? You can go shower, I’m almost done with my work, too.”
Jisung smiles and nods before speeding off to the bathroom. “Don’t forget to clean the mud from everywhere, Jisung-ah,” Minho calls out after him, because he can’t help but think about the possibilities of both of them having a free afternoon. And the little flowers Jisung gave him make him all fuzzy in the chest, so he hopes that he can show Jisung how much he appreciates the little gesture as soon as they’re both done.
He takes a tiny little bottle to put the flowers in before finishing up his work and clocking out. Jisung is taking his time in the shower, so Minho wonders how he should greet him, but when he walks past the bathroom he already bumps into Jisung, who is dressed in nothing more than a towel around his hips.
“Oh, hello there, cutie,” Minho says with a little smirk, checking him out from head to toe. Jisung has been gaining a bit of muscle from working outside at his job, especially in his shoulders, and Minho admires the way they contrast his tiny waist.
“Hi there, Minho-ring,” Jisung replies, a soft blush dusting his cheeks and his cheesy and playful grin on his face. “Do you come here often?”
“Where? The hallway? Yeah, kinda,” Minho tells him with a shrug, pretending to twirl his hair. He then trails a finger down Jisung’s chest until he reaches his faint abs (definitely there because of the lack of fat, rather than the presence of core muscles). “Job’s doing you good. Looking fine, hot shot. Or do you prefer prince?”
Jisung shivers a little and shrugs. “Anything is fine,” he replies softly, his fingers fidgeting with the towel. He looks up at Minho and huffs, leaning against the wall so that Minho isn’t touching him anymore, setting up a challenging expression. “And you? Are you just here to look or do you want something from me, jagi-yah?”
“I’d like to see what’s under that towel, princess,” he replies, stepping forward and crowding him against the wall, his finger trailing the edge of the towel. His heart is pounding fast already, because they haven’t had sex in a good while—not since before they fought. “Are you nice and clean?”
“Y-Yeah, I am,” Jisung admits, faltering in his little act as he grabs onto Minho’s arms. Minho hums, his ears growing warmer by the second as he threatens to dip his finger past the towel. Jisung’s hips twitch and arousal fills Minho’s stomach.
“Me too. Gave myself a long break and had a nice and thorough shower this afternoon,” Minho replies in a whisper, still trailing his finger along Jisung's hip bone. Jisung’s fingers tighten around his arms and he pulls Minho against him, capturing his lips and kissing him, impatiently moving his lips against him.
Minho melts against him, pressing their bodies flush against each other to rile them up a little more. He hungrily returns the kiss, biting Jisung’s lower lip before soothing it with his tongue. He trusts Jisung to tell him if he’s not in the mood, but from the way Jisung is gripping his arms and arching off the wall, Minho assumes he’s just as into this as Minho is.
Jisung pushes his tongue past Minho’s lips, licking into his mouth and letting Minho do the same. They drink up each other’s soft noises of content and Minho runs his hands along Jisung’s chest freely.
“H-Hyung… I feel too naked. I want to see you too,” Jisung says with a sigh, brushing their noses together. Minho softens and takes his hand before bringing them to the bedroom. Minho’s bedroom is closest, so he just takes him there, intertwining their fingers as he lies down on his back on the bed, guiding Jisung to lean over him.
“You can take everything off if you want, or I can give you a show,” Minho tells him as he caresses along Jisung’s shoulder, back and chest, looking up into his eyes. Jisung’s eyes shine in want and he purses his lips in thought. “You do want to do this, right?”
“Yeah. I do. And I wanna take it off, hyung,” he decides before diving down and kissing Minho again, soft and slow, but deep. He dips his fingers underneath Minho’s shirt, caressing his thumb along his soft stomach.
Minho threads his fingers into Jisung’s damp hair and tilts his head as he explores Jisung’s mouth with his tongue. He doesn’t know how he survived without kissing Jisung all the time before this, because his taste is so addictive, and the soft noises he lets out are so dizzyingly attractive.
“How do you want this, 'Sungie?” Minho asks as he parts for breath, gently carding his hands through his hair to distract himself from the slightly suffocating heat building inside. Jisung hums and noses at Minho’s cheek.
“I don't really mind, I just want to be close to you, hyung-ah,” he replies before pressing a kiss onto Minho’s skin. Minho notices that he’s in a bit of a cheesy and affectionate mood, but Minho feels the same way. He wants to treat this like their first time—because technically it is their first time while being boyfriends.
Jisung kisses Minho’s neck before shuffling down and pushing Minho’s shirt up to kiss his lower stomach, at the edge of his trousers. Minho giggles, but at the same time he shivers as a spike of arousal shoots down his spine, his cock twitching and coming to life. He tugs on Jisung’s hair, eliciting a sigh from him.
“Ah—Hyung, should we, uhm, change position? Do you still feel suffocated like this?” Jisung asks softly, looking up at Minho with big eyes. Minho softens, his heart fluttering because of the considerate words.
“It's getting a little stuffy like this, yeah, but I can ride you again if you want,” he answers and lets one of his hands trail down to caress Jisung’s warm cheek. Jisung closes his eyes and leans into the touch with a sigh.
“No, wanna be close, hyung. You'll crush me if you sit on my lap and I wanna hug you,” he replies after a moment. Minho’s snickers, but his stomach tightens at the thought of sitting on Jisung’s narrow hips and crushing him a bit—he'd probably look so small under his thighs.
“Aren't you into that?” he jokes, but Jisung huffs and ruts down onto Minho’s crotch, causing both of them to let out a strangled moan.
“I-I am, but not tonight,” he admits with a small pout. Minho hums and tucks a strand behind Jisung’s ear. He then guides Jisung’s hands back to his chest.
“Hmm, good to know, because I might be into that, too. You can continue undressing me and after you can sit on my cock and we’ll do this together, alright?” he suggests, his voice tight with arousal and emotion as Jisung looks down at him like he's a masterpiece.
“I'd like that.” The latter nods and runs his hands along Minho’s chest, stimulating his nipples a little before leaning down to kiss all over his torso. Minho sighs and enjoys the gentle sensation of Jisung’s lips on his skin.
Jisung takes his time caressing and placing kisses all over his upper body before peeling off his shirt and going back down, lips brushing Minho’s sensitive spots and making him let out low noises of pleasure.
Minho feels warm and content, but Jisung is still sitting on his crotch, their half hard lengths brushing through Minho’s pants and the towel every time he shifts, giving them both minimal friction.
“Hmm, your stomach is so soft, hyung, I love it,” Jisung says, rubbing his cheek against the part just below his navel, sending shivers down Minho’s spine. Minho snickers and caresses his head in appreciation. His stomach is definitely not his favorite part, but seeing and feeling Jisung give it so much love makes him feel weirdly proud of it.
“As soft as your cheeks? Both sets,” Minho asks in return and Jisung laughs before nodding, looking up at Minho through his lashes. “Speaking of which, you should get on with it, princess, I want to give you some attention, too. You're the one who worked hard today.”
“Okay,” Jisung replies with a giggle, slowly moving down his nose over Minho’s crotch through his pants. Minho sighs as Jisung pulls down Minho’s pants first, caressing along his hips, thighs, and calves, kissing down the inside. Jisung then kisses his half-hard cock through his underwear and Minho bites down on his lip, restraining himself from bucking up into the touch.
Jisung takes off Minho’s underwear and gently kisses the tip down to his balls and then his perineum. Minho shivers, his cock twitching where it’s lying on his stomach. Jisung then licks a fat stripe up his length before taking the head into his mouth and suckling on it.
He looks up through his eyelashes at Minho, eliciting a groan from the latter. Minho loves it, but he thought Jisung wanted to be close to him, so he grabs him by the hair to prevent him from going further.
Jisung lets out a moan when Minho pulls him off and Minho notices that he’s also hard already. “My turn, love,” he tells him before sitting up a little and beckoning Jisung to come closer. “C’mere.”
Jisung removes the towel before he sits down on Minho’s thighs, inching closer until their hard-ons brush. Minho grabs onto Jisung’s ass and squeezes. Jisung jolts and sighs. “Obsessive much, hyung?” he asks softly, chuckling as he moves to grind his ass over Minho’s hard cock, wrapping his arms around Minho’s neck.
“Can you blame me?” Minho scoffs and places a kiss onto Jisung’s warm cheek to prove his words. Jisung hums and just captures his lips into a proper kiss, gently smacking their lips together as they grind against each other, the delicious friction of skin against skin making Minho feel hot, but he likes kissing Jisung a little bit too much to stop.
Minho blindly shuffles around and reaches for the bedside stand to grab the lube. Jisung doesn’t allow him to part from him too much, holding him close and keeping their lips connected. Minho softly slaps his butt and Jisung parts with a sigh before kissing Minho’s neck as the other busies himself with the lube.
Jisung gasps against his skin when Minho spreads his cheeks and circles his rim with his finger. Minho teases him a little by simply pressing down but not letting his finger slip inside. Jisung softly whines and tries to rock back onto his finger, but Minho doesn’t allow him yet.
Only until Jisung pouts at him does Minho relent and push his finger inside, leaning forward to kiss and suck on the sensitive spot under Jisung’s ear. Jisung takes in a sharp breath and holds Minho by the hair, hips twitching as Minho gently fucks him with his finger, looking for his prostate to help him relax and loosen up.
“Ah—Hyung—Hmmm, I missed this. Please mark me,” Jisung admits breathily, pushing their chests together as Minho gently bites down on Jisung’s skin, hopefully leaving a mark without hurting him. “Been wanting you like this again for a while.”
Minho’s heart flutters and he ducks down to suck another mark on Jisung’s chest, letting the words sink in. He keeps working Jisung open in the meantime, making sure to rile him up by brushing his prostate with every other thrust.
“Me too,” Minho eventually admits, straightening himself and looking Jisung in the eyes. His whole face is flushed and his pupils are blown, but his gaze is so loving. “Wanted you to myself. Didn’t wanna push you, though.”
“Thank you, hyung-ah. You can add another finger, by the way, wanna sit on your cock already,” Jisung replies, switching from sweet to spicy in a second, and Minho lets out a startled laugh before adding some more lube and pushing in a third finger. He fucks his fingers into Jisung’s hole a little faster, nibbling on his skin as he enjoys the breathy moans Jisung lets out.
Jisung then sneaks a hand into the minimal space between their bodies to grab Minho’s hard cock and tug on it, first pressing his thumb into his slit and using his precum to smoothen the glide a little. Minho moans and he squeezes his cheeks as he thrusts his fingers harder into Jisung’s hole, knuckles catching on his rim.
He barely notices that he’s abusing Jisung’s prostate as he gets lost in the pleasure of Jisung’s rough hand jerking him off, and his brain feels like it’s melting when Jisung uses his free hand to cup Minho’s jaw and pull him into a filthy kiss. They sloppily explore each other’s mouths, bodies pressed flush against one another.
“Hyung-ah— Oh— ’M gonna cum,” Jisung says with a gasp as he arches his back and squirms on his lap, and Minho slows down his hand, using the leftover lube to put on his own cock, pushing Jisung’s hand off. The brief pause allows them to slow down and bring the mood back to something lighter.
They meet eyes and Minho can’t help but smile, mirroring Jisung’s bashful grin. “Good? Ready? Or do you need a second?” Minho asks as he brings his clean hand to caress Jisung’s warm cheek with his knuckles. Jisung hums and nods, but he takes a moment to rub his face against Minho’s hand in appreciation, reminding Minho of his cats and filling Minho’s chest with fondness.
Jisung kisses the back of Minho’s hand before placing his own on Minho’s shoulder to steady himself as he grabs Minho’s cock to line himself up with it. Minho holds his waist to help him up, and he can’t help but look down to watch.
Jisung’s beautiful waist, the sneak peek of his plump butt cheeks, and hard cock leaking against his stomach make Minho’s mouth water, and he flushes in anticipation. Jisung sinks down slowly, holding eye contact with Minho despite both of their eyelids threatening to flutter close.
Minho tightens his grip on Jisung’s waist, squeezing as Jisung bottoms out and he resists the urge to fuck up into him. Jisung whines and bites his lip, so Minho kisses him and takes his lower lip between his teeth instead, gently tugging on it before soothing it with his tongue. “Let me hear you, Jisung-ah,” he tells him.
Jisung nods, slowly circling his hips onto Minho’s lap. His eyebrows twitch as he’s getting used to the feeling of Minho inside him after a while. Minho gently caresses his sides and kisses his jaw. “Hmm, you’re doing well, love,” he praises him softly, making Jisung whimper and smile, and it feels so good to call him that without having to think about it.
“I feel really good, hyung-ah,” Jisung replies as he cards a hand through Minho’s hair, and he slowly starts rolling his hips, cock rubbing against Minho’s stomach. Minho decides to just help him out from the start, because this is less about chasing their pleasure and making it hot and more about having an intimate moment together.
Jisung leans his forehead against Minho’s as he starts fully riding him, lifting himself up with Minho’s help before grinding down, going slow but it’s just as good like this, and Minho’s stomach tightens in pleasure. Their bodies move in synchronization, building up a rhythm that is nice for the both of them.
Jisung was right, this position is perfect to be close to each other, almost as if they’re just hugging, and it gives him the gorgeous view of Jisung’s slightly sweaty hair, parted lips, and loving eyes pointed down at him from up so close.
Jisung leans down to brush their lips together as Minho lifts his hips to meet Jisung’s bounces, aiming for his prostate. They kiss and kiss, drinking up each other’s moans and whines, Jisung unable to keep his hands off Minho’s neck, chest, and hair, caressing him all over, sending shivers down Minho’s spine.
Minho kind of doesn’t want it to end, but the continuous stimulation of his cock combined with the feeling of Jisung’s waist in his grip and his lips on his own is starting to get to his head. Their kiss gets more and more desperate as the coil in Minho’s abdomen tightens, and Minho starts fucking up into Jisung more frantically.
“Oh fuck—” he curses and Jisung whimpers when Minho hits his prostate dead-on. They meet eyes again and Minho almost cums on the spot, his chest filling with this overwhelming warmth. “I love you, Jisung-ah. I love you,” he tells him, the words slipping from his lips as the thought overtakes him.
Jisung gasps and presses a couple of firm kisses on Minho’s cheeks, then on his nose, forehead and then his lips. “I love you too, Minho. So much. I love you so much,” he whispers back, and Minho groans—he’s so close, but he can’t focus on anything other than the words Jisung tells him so sincerely.
It doesn’t take long for Minho to cum, bucking his hips up and helping Jisung as he rides him—he has really gotten stronger since he started his job. Jisung moans as he feels Minho’s cum fill him up, and he slows down as he works Minho through it before grabbing his hand and letting them jerk Jisung off together.
It only takes a couple of seconds before Jisung reaches his high as well, keening as he obviously fights closing his eyes. Minho holds him close, working him through his orgasm as he recovers from his own.
“Hmm, hyung-ah—hmm…” Jisung sits down and kisses Minho again, shivering in oversensitivity when he teasingly rubs his dick before letting go and melting into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Jisung’s waist and pulling him flush against him.
They kiss, savoring the moment and the warmth until they get uncomfortable because of the sticky situation down near their groin area. Minho gets them a couple of tissues to clean up, kissing Jisung’s cheeks, chest, and legs to give him some more love. “You did well, cutie. I really liked this position, too. Do your legs hurt?”
“Thank you, jagi-yah. I’m a little tired now, but nothing hurts,” he answers softly, reaching out to run a hand through Minho’s hair in appreciation. Minho blushes and leans into the touch for a moment. He then massages Jisung’s butt and legs to ease his muscles, and Jisung sighs in content.
“Let’s take a shower together,” he suggests, but Jisung lets out a noise of protest, so Minho leans down to blow a raspberry on his stomach, making Jisung squeal and kick his legs in laughter.
He almost kicks Minho in the face and he gasps when Minho flinches, quickly sitting up and apologizing. Minho just laughs and lets Jisung cling onto him before taking them to the bathroom.
Showering together doesn't only save time, it's also way more relaxing, and it gives them another excuse to be all touchy with each other. Minho’s heart doesn't seem to want to stop skipping beats, even though he really should be used to this feeling by now, but the way Jisung smiles and keeps stealing kisses never gets old.
“Minho… Stop looking at me like that,” he says with a small pout, pushing at Minho’s shoulder. Minho snickers and just turns Jisung around to hug him from behind, humming as he rests his chin on his shoulder. “What's up, jagi-yah?”
“Nothing much. I just… I meant what I said earlier,” he admits softly, nosing behind his boyfriend's ear. “I love you.”
Jisung’s breath hitches and he melts against Minho’s chest, hearts beating in sync. “I love you too. I really do,” he answers in a whisper before turning his head and pressing a kiss onto Minho’s lips.
There are a couple of things Minho knows for sure in life: cats are the best creatures in existence, food tastes better when you eat it with someone, he is in love with Han Jisung, and Han Jisung is in love with him, too.