Chapter Text
There's still the feeling of dust under his nails, in his mouth, on his clothes - everywhere. A desperation under his skin to just do something, make it better, make it right.
He's a genius, why can't he do this?
"Mr. Stark, I don't feel so good."
It's playing again and again in his head, drowning out Bruce and Rhodey, Rogers and his stupid, empathetic eyes. There are people missing on earth too, he just knows it when he stumbles out of that damn spaceship with Nebula, but he doesn’t have the mind to pay attention to it, not when-
“Tony… there was no other way…”
He’s never seen Strange, Stephen, like that, has never heard his name come out of his mouth in a tone like that. He should be angry. Furious and disappointed. But instead there’s just this hole in his chest, in his gut. This vast emptiness - he’s sure if someone would look to where his heart is, there would be nothing in its stead, only a ripped out and torn apart mess.
The compound feels cold and empty and even though he almost sobs in relief when Friday welcomes him back and sounds like she's ready to take on everyone and everything that would try to take him away again, it's too silent, too much like the loneliness on Titan and the Milano.
He feels numb when they put him in a wheelchair and bring him to Bruce - Rhodey knows him well enough to be sure he won't let anyone else examine him now that Stephen isn't with them anymore. They don't talk about it, the loss, but it's easy enough to guess after he floats in space for days and only comes back with a blue lady none of them know.
The Compound is familiar but at the same time not, too painful to look at every nook and cranny and see them, to remember the time everything was nice and good and happy.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
To everyone that's looking close enough, there's an almost manic desperation in Tony's eyes, a panic so raw, he doesn't know how to tame. But no one is ever looking too close.
Pepper and Rhodey would, if he'd let them, but Tony is nothing if not good at evading, at dodging questions and searching looks.
That's why he's standing where he is, in front of an ancient looking building in the middle of New York that stands out among the other houses, but no person walking by seems to care. Do they even see it?
Tony walks up the steps and presses the doorbell. There's no sound inside the house and he wonders if it's still functional. He presses it a second time and waits. No one answers. He wonders if this rumor about the so-called "Sorcerer Supreme" is really true. Tony hates magic but if it's the only thing that can help him understand, he's willing to do anything.
He's about to turn around and walk away, maybe take another chance tomorrow, when the door suddenly springs open just a few inches. Maybe it's an accident, maybe it's an invitation, Tony doesn't question it too much when he pulls the door open and steps inside.
The building is larger than it looks from the outside and Tony absentmindedly wonders if it's some kind of magical thing, like Mary Poppins' handbag. The place is vast and beautiful, all dark wood and polished floors. It's also completely empty.
"Hello?", Tony tries and doesn't receive an answer. "I'm here to talk to the Sorcerer Supreme."
It stays silent and he looks around, at the big skylight in the roof and the grand oak doors he walked through.
"Tony Stark." The voice comes suddenly and monotone, a deep, authoritative tone that reminds Tony of anything else than a wizard.
"What an unexpected visit." Tony finally turns around and sees a man his age walking down the grand staircase. He seems familiar and when he comes closer, Tony knows why.
The world renowned neurosurgeon Doctor Stephen Strange is the last person Tony expected to be a wizard, even less after his fatal car accident only about a year and a half ago.
"Doctor Strange", Tony addresses him and watches surprise flit over the other man's face, before he schools his features back into that impassive mask.
Tony holds his hand out when Strange steps near and the man grabs it in shaking fingers, his hands concealed by gloves. He's wearing clothes that make him look more like a medieval knight than some kind of modern Merlin. It says a lot about Tony's current mental state that he refrains from commenting on it.
"What can I do for you, Mr. Stark?" Strange clasps his hands behind his back as soon as Tony lets go of his hand, the red cape on his shoulders fluttering even without any wind. It gives Tony the creeps and maybe he stares a moment too long at it, because when he looks up again, there's an expectant expression on Strange's face.
"I need some…advice.", Tony says and watches the other man's eyebrows climb even higher. He stays silent though, waiting for Tony to explain himself.
"You probably heard about recent…events."
Tony is prepared for the rush of guilt and the pain of remembering Jarvis, but it still hurts, thinking about all the mistakes he made in only the span of a few days. Just because some Hydra kid decided to mess with his head. And now Bruce is gone, Thor has left for Asgard and the rest of them look at him every day and try to hide their disappointment. But Tony sees it anyway.
"It was hard to miss.", Strange says, his tone of voice not indicating what he really thinks about the matter.
"Right…" Tony stalls, trying to find the right words to explain what he wants from Strange without sounding stupid. "Well, then you also must have heard about the two Hydra kids? One of them having magical abilities?"
Strange nods mutely, his brows furrowing in disapproval, for what, Tony can only guess.
"One of them messed with my head.", Tony rushes out, looking at Strange's unchanging expression. "I need you to tell me if what she's shown me was an illusion or a prophecy of the future."
Strange keeps staring at him, his face or body language not giving anything away. Tony usually prides himself in being able to read most people, but this guy is as big a mystery as the existence of magic itself.
"If you can do that.", he adds, almost like an afterthought, not wanting to offend but also not knowing what this magic can or can’t do. If it's even existing.
Strange stays silent for a very long moment, unmoving and impassive, eyeing Tony in a way that makes him want to shrink back and hide. Then, his stance suddenly loosens and his shoulders relax.
“So, you want me to mess with your head even more?” There’s a hint of amusement in his voice now, a glint in his eyes that hasn’t been there before and Tony relaxes slightly.
“Well…This time I’m at least giving permission.” It’s supposed to sound joking, but it comes out flat instead, changing Strange’s face back into the disapproval it held before. Tony is almost sure now that it isn’t directed at him.
“Theoretically, it’s possible to look at your memories, even if it’s quite tasking for you and the performing sorcerer.” Strange turns around while he’s still talking and motions for Tony to follow him up the stairs.
“The difficult part would be to determine the authenticity of what you saw. It’s possible, but only incidental with a lot of pain.” They enter a vast library, so big, Tony can’t see the end of the room. “It has some risks though. In the worst case, all your memories will be erased permanently, or your short-term memory will get damaged.”
A shiver runs down Tony’s back at the thought. He tries not to linger on it too long.
“And in the best case?”
“I can tell you if what you saw is going to happen or if she just played an ill prank on you.”
“Okay, do it.”
Strange looks taken aback at Tony’s answer for a moment, apparently not thinking this would be his decision. It probably wouldn’t have been, a few months or maybe only a few days ago, but after what Scarlet Witch showed him, he would do anything to prevent it, to intervene and prepare.
All his life, Tony prided himself on his mind, on the genius intellect that has brought Stark Industries to what it is now and created the Iron Man armor. But what does all that mean, in the end, when he can’t even save his friends? He already failed with Ultron and paid the price for it. He’s not about to do that again.
“Are you sure?”, Strange asks seriously and stops at one of the countless bookshelves. Does the thought of anything not scientifically explainable make his skin crawl? A big, fat yes. But is he sure he wants to prevent the future the witch has shown him? Absolutely. So he nods certainly and looks at Strange, hoping he looks more determined than he feels.
After a moment, Strange nods back and turns around, walking back out of the library. "Follow me."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"It's not real, yet.", Stephen has said back then. "But it's a possibility that can come true."
It's been an endless fight since then. Tony has never told anyone about it, not even Pepper and Rhodey. Stephen and the Scarlet Witch are the only other people that know about it.
Now, after Thanos and losing half of the universe's population, Tony wonders where he went wrong, what he could've done differently.
His quarters in the Compound feel suffocating and the rest of the building isn't better, with its new, partly unwelcome inhabitants. It's not the first time that Tony thinks about moving back into the tower or rebuilding his house in Malibu. Hell, at this point, he would even enjoy a cabin in the woods, maybe nicely situated at a lake.
But thinking about the future, even thinking about tomorrow or what he's going to do in an hour feels wrong. How can he just live on while he failed the universe so spectacularly? While he failed Peter and Stephen so spectacularly?
Stephen. At night, when he can't sleep, Tony wonders what the man saw. In 14 million possible futures, was there really just one where they won? And is it really this one? Because this doesn't feel like winning, this feels like everything else but a victory.
Since coming back to earth, he's silent and subdued. Maybe that's why they're all treating him like he's broken. He doesn't care. Let them think what they want. How is he supposed to talk, to feel the need to say anything when everything is so meaningless right now? Half the universe is dead, his babbling won't bring them back.
It comes to a head when a few days after his rescue, they card him into one of the conference rooms with the rest of the survivors that were involved in the fight. Tony doesn't even question the talking raccoon and just tries to bear the fact that Rogers is there too. When said man has the nerve to talk to him directly, asking what went wrong with Thanos on their end, Tony just snaps.
He's sitting in a wheelchair, an IV at his elbow, trying to simultaneously ignore and bear the fact that half of the universe is dead, so who can really blame him for throwing the time Rogers almost killed him in Siberia back into his face?
He ends up collapsing from the exertion of screaming Rogers in the face. When he wakes up again, he thinks that Stephen would be proud but also whack him on the head at the same time. Maybe he would also be mad he didn't get a chance to finally get Rogers into his own hands after waiting for an opportunity for two years. Tony doesn't know if he wants to smile or cry at the thought, so he just does neither and stares at the ceiling until Bruce declares him well enough again to go back to his own quarters. Rogers doesn't try talking to him again.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Strange looks into his mind and disappears off the earth for several months after. Tony didn’t expect to get close to the doctor after him getting a look at his messed up head, but he feels indebted to the man and also curious about his magic. There needs to be a scientific explanation for it and Tony’s hands itch to discover it.
But Strange is nowhere to be found and the one time Tony knocks on the door again of his magical Mary Poppins place, an Asian man with an impressive frown opens the door and tells him the doctor has gone on some kind of Harry Potter mission for an indecisive amount of time. Tony actively ignores the disappointment he feels at that and throws himself back into work.
The Compound in upstate New York is now housing the Avengers sans Bruce, Thor, Clint and himself. Tony doesn’t feel comfortable living there with the Witch under his roof and half of who he’s familiar with gone. So he stays in the tower, trying to drown himself in projects and ideas to prevent what Strange has confirmed. He still hasn’t really figured out how though, and with a large part of the world’s population and the UN breathing down his neck, demanding someone to be held accountable for the damage that has been done through Hulk in New York and Ultron in Sokovia, Tony feels like he can’t catch a breath. Or a wink of sleep with the additional nightmares plaguing his nights.
It happens on one of those evenings, when it’s already late enough to go to sleep, but not late enough yet for it to be questionable to stay up a bit longer. Not that Tony ever paid attention to such things. If he wanted to pull an all-nighter, he would.
He’s in the workshop, updating his suit once again, trying not to burn himself with the welding machine while simultaneously keeping his eyes from falling shut. The last full night of sleep was months ago and probably only because he landed himself unconscious in the hospital.
It’s when the hot welding machine almost slips from his hand that Friday turns it off and alerts him to something going on outside the tower.
“There’s a flying cape wrapped around an unconscious man outside the 92nd story window, Boss.”
Tony rubs at his eyes, trying to make sense of that. Without saying another word or having to be prompted, Friday pulls up a live feed from the security cameras of said story and Tony just stares at it for a moment, dumbfounded.
A kind of familiar red cape, completely wrapped around no other than Stephen Strange, is floating right outside the big glass door leading from his penthouse to the balcony. The sorcerer is unconscious, a big gash on his forehead still oozing blood.
“Friday, open the doors to the penthouse.”, Tony says in a hurry, already up and at the door, his exhaustion from just a moment ago making room for worry. Strange is a doctor, he probably still has some connections to old colleagues. Why in the world would his magical cape, that is apparently sentient, bring him all the way to his tower?
When Tony arrives at his penthouse not even a minute after Friday’s alert, the cape has already deposited Strange’s unconscious form on the large couch. Now that the red fabric isn’t wrapped around him anymore, Tony can see more wounds on his abdomen and chest. The long sleeves of his usual robe are almost completely ripped apart, revealing bloody scratches and reddened skin. It’s almost a miracle that the gloves on his hands are still intact when the rest of Strange’s blue clothes are now almost dyed red from his own blood.
“Friday, do a full body scan.” Tony kneels down to feel for a pulse, waiting some agonizing seconds before a weak heartbeat finally pulses against his fingers.
“His left leg is badly sprained, there are deep gashes on his body and a stab wound in his abdomen that injured the liver has caused severe internal bleeding. Immediate intervention is needed.”
Well, shit. He knows basic first aid, but definitely not enough for the severity of injuries in this form.
“Okay, shit.” Running a hand through his hair, Tony stands up from where he’s still kneeling beside Strange, his fingers on his pulse point. His mind runs through the few possibilities he has right now and comes to the only logical conclusion. He needs to move Strange to the Compound. There’s no hospital he trusts enough and he doubts Strange wants to be seen like this. Not to mention that the man seems to be very secretive about what’s going on with that magic thing in his life since his car accident.
“Friday, contact Helen Cho, fly her out to the Compound immediately. Let her know what’s going on and show her the scans. Contact the medical team at the Compound and let them prepare an operation room.”
Opening up a holo screen, Tony stops the update uploading to his newest suit and lets it assemble in the penthouse. There isn’t nearly enough time to go to the Compound by car and the Quinjet is currently also stationed in upstate New York. Opening up the suit with the flick of a wrist, he lets it wrap around Strange, the weird cape settling on the shoulders of the armor once only the faceplate is still open.
“Fly him out as fast as possible, Fri, but be careful. And you-” Tony points at the cape and ignores how dumb he feels talking to a piece of fabric. “You brought him here, make sure he makes it. And stabilize the flight.”
The faceplate snaps shut a second later and then Friday is gone, out of the open balcony doors and up into the night sky, although a lot more careful than if Tony would be controlling the armor himself.
For a moment, he just stands in the middle of his living room and stares after them, so many questions plaguing his mind. But then he decides to shove them away for later and runs back down to the workshop to follow in a second suit.
- - -
It's probably a good thing that Steve and Natasha took the team out for a two-week training exercise to Alaska. He doubts Strange would have wanted the attention of the whole team and also his identity revealed to them. And however much deserved it might or might not be, the team is also too suspicious for their own good sometimes. Not that Tony doesn't have that quality too, but especially Natasha takes it to a completely different level.
So the Compound is dark and blissfully silent when Tony arrives, not even five minutes after Friday and Strange. Only the medical wing is lit up and bustling with activity when Tony enters, everybody preparing for surgery.
Strange’s weird cape is fluttering around in the waiting area, obviously not having been allowed into the preparation and operation rooms. Knowing this can take a while, Tony sits down and takes out his phone to continue some work. He hasn’t really gotten his phone fully out yet, when the red fabric suddenly wraps around his shoulders and squeezes, as if searching for comfort. Frozen for a moment, Tony just takes a corner of the cape into his hand and gently squeezes back.
- - -
"Mister Stark? Tony?", a quiet voice reaches his brain, before a hand accompanies it and gently shakes his shoulder. He must have fallen asleep, although his sleep as usual isn’t very deep. When Tony opens his eyes, he feels blearily and still exhausted. Looking around for what woke him up, his eyes finally settle on Helen Cho, still in scrubs, her hair in a messy ponytail. He feels warm and when he tries to sit up, the red fabric on his chest steers and moves away slightly and Tony finally recognizes the cape.
“Is it done?”, he asks finally, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, trying not to think too hard about the fact that this was the first time in a long while that he slept undisturbed by his own mind for this long and that it's probably because of the red, creepy fabric.
"We were able to stabilize Doctor Strange. He will still be in critical condition for a few days, but we stopped the internal bleeding and patched him up. All we can do now is wait for him to wake up. You can visit him, if you'd like."
With a smile, Helen turns around and walks down the corridor, leaving Tony to wake up completely while the cape flutters around him excitedly. How the thing can have a mind of its own, Tony has decided to not question it anymore for the sake of his sanity.
The fabric wraps around his shoulders again, like an oversized scarf or poncho, and together they make their way to Strange's room. He's still in the ICU and when the nurses make Tony change into clean scrubs, he wonders if Strange has anyone he'd like Tony to call. At the end of the day, they're little more than strangers though. Maybe he should go to Strange's house again tomorrow and speak with the frowning Asian man he met there once.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Tony doesn't take the credit for saving Stephen's life, that belongs solely to the cape, or cloak as Stephen likes to correct him, and Helen Cho. Stephen is still grateful though and maybe it's only Tony's imagination, but after that whole ordeal, he becomes nicer, more welcoming. It's not that they see each other more often after, but when they do, Stephen sometimes even chats a minute or two with him.
After blowing up at Rogers, Tony leaves his room even less. Rhodey still shows up at least once a day and Friday is a constant companion, but Tony wishes he could go back to the tower. He may have built the Compound, but it's still unfamiliar to him. This isn't a home, not like it once was for the rest of the team. When there still was a team. The tower comes the closest to a home Tony has ever had and now that half the universe's population is gone, now that random portals won't be opening in his workshop at 2am, now that he won't have a spidery intern anymore, it won't be the same. But it's still all he has right now and he longs for it.
It's on the second day after he told Rogers what he really thinks that he suddenly and desperately remembers the Cloak. He hasn't seen him since they pulled him from outer space and he wonders where he is. When he was trapped on the Milano with Nebula, the Cloak has never once left his side, constantly wrapping around his shoulders or laying itself over him like a blanket. He was fraying at the edges from their fight on Titan and Tony promised to fix him if they were ever going to make it back to earth.
Now with everything going on since he's back and being only half conscious in the first few days due to malnourishment and dehydration, Tony didn't even notice the absence of the Cloak. It makes him feel more guilty than a piece of fabric should, but he misses the comfort and he knows the Cloak has gotten used to him too.
Getting out of bed is exhausting, but it's nothing he isn't used to. Exhaustion clings to him like a tick ever since the Battle of New York. He's gotten good at ignoring it, so he just gives himself a moment longer than usual to sit on the side of the bed. Foregoing the wheelchair, because he's not an invalid, thank you very much Rhodey, he takes a few careful steps and deems his legs steady enough to walk the few corridors to the communal area.
Since he came back, and even before that when he visited the Compound, Tony always avoided the communal living room and kitchen like the plague. Right now, it's probably the first place he should look for anyone. They tend to gravitate towards each other ever since their loss, as if scared the ones that are left could suddenly disappear too. And Tony tries to do the opposite, avoiding everyone as much as possible.
The walk through the Compound is exerting and when he finally makes it to the communal living room, he has to take a break and lean on the wall right outside. From there, he can already hear voices and when he doesn't hear Rogers', he relaxes slightly. He isn't keen on talking to the man again any time soon.
Rhodey and Bruce are sitting on the big couch when he enters, watching the re-run of some kind of sitcom. Tony has the feeling they're both not really watching though, just letting it play to fill the silence, so he makes himself known by clearing his throat. Both men whip around at the sound, as if expecting Thanos to come knocking at their door, and relax when they see him.
"Tony, you shouldn't be up.", is the first thing Bruce says, then, as he stands up and walks around the couch towards him. It doesn't sound accusing, just resigned, like he has been expecting this sooner or later.
"I'm fine, I'm just searching for something."
"You could have called me to ask, Tones." Rhodey is still sitting, the TV now paused though and his body turned towards him in full attention.
"Had to stretch my legs.", Tony answers dismissively and distractedly, already looking around the room for the familiar red fabric. "You two wouldn't have happened to see that cloak Doctor Strange is always wearing?"
His eyes continue to search the room, missing the two men glancing at each other.
"Strange's cloak? That cape thing?"
Tony nods distractedly, moving to the kitchen at the other side of the room.
"He was with me on the Milano and I haven't seen him since."
"It definitely isn't in the Compound.", Bruce says and moves to Tony's side. "I haven't seen anything like it since you came back."
"Maybe it stayed on the ship?", Rhodey suggests then and Tony's head snaps up in alert, suddenly also remembering that he hasn't seen Nebula in days. How much more of an ass can he be?
Without another word, Tony turns around and heads for the closest door that leads him outside. His sudden stride leaves him breathless in seconds but he doesn't care. Has anyone even brought them something to eat, asked them to come inside? Are they even still on the Milano?
The spaceship is closed when he finally stands in front of it, but he hasn't even knocked on it yet or called for Nebula, when the ramp suddenly opens barely a few inches and something red and familiar flits out and tackles Tony.
The Cloak wraps around his shoulders, squeezing tightly, and Tony wonders not for the first time what he would say if he could speak. Just a moment later, the ramp opens up the rest of the way and Nebula steps out, cautious and ready for an attack, but her shoulders relax slightly upon seeing him. By now, Bruce and Rhodey have caught up with him, watching them from a few feet away.
Squeezing a corner of the cloak back and waiting until Nebula steps beside him, Tony leads them back inside, suddenly exhausted now that he found what he was looking for. Rhodey and Bruce follow a few steps behind, not saying a word.
The Cloak doesn't move until Tony plops down on one corner of the couch in the communal living room and leans back into the cushions with a sigh. He motions for Nebula to sit down beside him when she just keeps standing awkwardly in the middle of the room. The moment she does, the Cloak spreads itself over their laps like a blanket. Tony is asleep not even five minutes later.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Letting Peter meet Strange is, first of all, totally accidental, but also maybe the best thing that Tony has ever done.
Stephen - because they're suddenly on a first name basis since he decided Tony saved his life - has started to just pop up in his workshop every few weeks when he needs help with something. Meaning a portal opens at every possible hour of the day and the doctor slash wizard just steps through and demands attention.
Tony has heard rumors, even before knowing Stephen personally, about how arrogant and uncaring he is. He's yet to see any of that behaviour.
Peter has been a constant in his life for about half a year, with regular workshop visits and, since a few weeks, occasional dinners. Pepper, Rhodey and Happy are the only ones knowing about him, sans his alter ego, and Tony intends to let it stay that way.
It's almost scary how fast he started to care for the kid, but in hindsight, it has been inevitable since he visited the boy and his aunt in their two-bedroom apartment. At first it might have been the shock that the new and scary strong vigilante is a fifteen year old boy in red pyjamas, but it wasn't pity that made Tony decide to take him under his wing. The kid is another level of smart, a small genius, and it reminds him so much of his own youth, growing up first with uncaring parents and then completely without them. He's probably the wrong person for it, but he wants to be there for the kid, guide him and make things possible that normally wouldn't be in their financial situation. Tony just didn't expect to start caring so much.
So it's on one of those evenings, where Peter persuaded his aunt to let him stay for dinner, that Stephen shows up.
They're sitting at the kitchen counter, two boxes of family sized pizzas in front of them, when Peter suddenly stops in the middle of his rambling about a school project he's doing with his friend Ned and jumps up, as if ready for an attack. Tony knows about that sense he has, being able to know when something is going to happen, so trusting the kid's instincts, he stands up too and waits for what's to come. When orange sparks materialize out of nothing, forming a perfect circle in the middle of his kitchen, Tony relaxes instantly and sits back down.
Not even a second later, Stephen Strange walks through the portal, but stops halfway through upon seeing a teenager in a fighting stance right in front of him.
"Relax, kid. He's a friend.", Tony says without looking up from his food, completely missing the surprised look on Stephen's face.
"Is that a wizard, Mister Stark?", Peter asks then, relaxing his stance. "I thought you don't like magic?"
"I don't." Tony grins, more at Stephen's offended expression at being called a wizard, again, than at Peter and takes another bite of his pizza. Stephen hasn't said a word since stepping through the portal.
"Is that a cape, Mister wizard, sir?" Peter's excited tone makes Tony smile. "That's so cool! It's just like Thor's!"
As if offended by the comparison, the Cloak suddenly leaves Strange's shoulders and wraps itself around Peter, who squeaks in surprise.
"It's alive?! That's so cool!"
At the compliment, the Cloak unwraps itself and floats in front of Peter instead, holding out a corner as if to shake hands with the teenager. Stunned into silence, Peter takes it and introduces himself to the piece of fabric as if that's the most normal thing in the world. Tony decides that for his own piece of mind, he's not going to say anything. When Stephen sits down on the empty bar stool beside him, Peter apparently decides to do the same.
"Since when do you have a kid?", the doctor asks instead and Tony snorts into his glass of soda.
"Not my kid. He's an intern."
"Hm.", is the only thing Strange answers to that, his gaze sweeping to where Peter is having an animated conversation with the Cloak, however that's possible.
"Mister wizard, sir?" The cloak wrapped around his shoulders, Peter sits down opposite them, taking another piece of pizza.
"My name is Stephen Strange."
"Oh wow, that's an unusual name. Okay Mister Strange, sir. Does the cape have a name?" Peter asks so earnestly, Tony has to keep in a laugh.
"It's a cloak. And no, it doesn't have a name.", Stephen says seemingly annoyed, but Tony can see the bemused glint in his eyes and the corners of his mouth. It's hard not to like Peter.
"Aww, why? He's sentient, right?" Peter barely waits for Stephen's nod before he continues. "That means he needs a name."
"He?", Tony asks amused.
"It's a he, obviously.", Peter answers with so much conviction, it's Stephen's time to snort now.
"Okay, Mister…?"
"Peter Parker."
"Okay, Mister Parker. What names do you suggest, then?"
As Tony watches Stephen interact with Peter, something warm unfurls in his chest, something he doesn't dare name in fear of what it is. Here in his kitchen, speaking to a fifteen year old boy about his sentient cloak, the doctor looks as relaxed as Tony has ever seen him before, his chin propped on one hand, a bemused smile on his lips and what he came here for originally completely forgotten. It couldn't have been that important if Stephen allows this so readily.
He stays until Peter has to go home and then leaves without ever asking or telling Tony what he wanted in the first place.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
June turns to July, to August and September and Tony just exists. It's not like he's unfamiliar with depression, but never like this, so all-consuming.
What is left to life when half the universe is dead and it's partly your fault? Not much, to be honest.
Rhodey and Bruce try to keep them all together, for whatever reason. There's a group dinner every evening that Tony never attends and a group breakfast every Sunday. Tony has gone to both just once and knows that neither Clint nor the talking Raccoon or Nebula are attending. Not that Nebula is a surprise with the way she's glued to him.
Neither she nor the Cloak have left his side since he pulled both from the Milano and moved them into the spare bedroom in his quarters. The sentient red fabric is constantly wrapped around his shoulders or spread across his lap and Tony feels cold without its comfort. It’s the only thing he has left from Stephen.
After he came back to earth, he tried to contact Stephen’s friend, Wong, exactly once, only to quickly find out that he turned to dust too. The same goes for Peter’s aunt and his friend Ned. It’s like Peter has been wiped from the planet completely, leaving Tony to be the only one to really care he ever existed.
The streets in New York are empty. The president is dead and half of the parliament. People are losing jobs and perspective and in their desperation turn to violence and stealing. Even without Stephen or Wong, the Sanctum is shielded from all of it, but Tony was just early enough to bring most of Peter's and his aunt's things to safety, for the time they'll be able to pick them up themselves.
However hard it is to fathom, he doesn't believe half the universe is really dead. They're gone, that he's sure of, the evidence is staring him in the face everyday, but the universe isn't cruel enough for this. He's seen what the Infinity Stones can do and there's always a back door. Tony just needs to find it and that's the really hard thing when he's so overtaken by grief and helplessness.
He also has no idea where to start since Thanos fucked off to god knows where with the stones. And it's not like the remaining Avengers are better off than him.
Thor might be even more depressed than him, Natasha and Steve spend all their time in the gym, Bruce and Rhodey started watching reruns of every possible sitcom just to get their mind off things and the racoon, Rocket, is probably demolishing a part of the Compound right this second. And then there's Clint, who's probably the worst of them all, mourning his whole family. At least Tony still has the cloak and, when she's feeling like it, Nebula. Clint has nothing.
At least, when September turns to October and the days get colder and rainier, none of them need an excuse anymore to stay holed up inside.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Tony thinks calling it a "Civil War" is a bit over the top until his whole world turns upside down in a Siberian bunker.
He doesn't hate Barnes, not really, but when Zemo plays that grainy and old security camera footage and Tony sees his mother being strangled to death, rage floods his veins hot and heavy. It's only a few moments later that he also realizes Steve has been lying to him for almost as long as they've known each other. The betrayal fits nicely beside the anger and hurt in his stomach and Tony lets it simmer there.
Fighting your friend hurts in more than just one way and Tony gets it, he really does. Barnes is to Steve what Rhodey is to him and he doesn’t know what he would have done if their roles were reversed. But they aren’t and in that bunker, he doesn’t have the mind to think about any of that.
They fight and for a moment Tony wins, blasts that godforsaken metal arm off Barnes and might have even finished him. The next thing he remembers, though, is his systems failing and the harsh Siberian cold almost seeping through the back of his suit where he's lying on the floor, Steve straddling him. He lifts the shield, his father's shield, above his head and Tony can only do so much as raise his arms in front of his broken faceplate and accept that this is how he's going to die, in a Siberian bunker at the hand of someone he called a friend.
Barnes is somewhere to the side, watching as Steve slams the shield down one, two, three times, before the suit dies completely and Tony is left on the brink of consciousness. His body screams in agony when Steve rips the shield free and intends to take it with him, but even in his state, Tony won't let that happen. In the end, he doesn't care if it's pity or guilt or whatever that lets Steve throw the shield at his feet and leave with Barnes.
Tony stares at the blue and red and silver until he finally falls unconscious.
- - -
It's seconds or minutes or maybe hours later when he next opens his eyes and almost thinks he's hallucinating when Stephen Strange stares him in the face with a very concerned expression. Tony smiles because this seems almost too good to be true.
"Tony", the not-so-real Stephen says then and gently taps him on the cheek a few times so his heavy eyes won't fall shut again.
"Tony, I need you to tell me how to open the suit. Friday is down and I can't transport you like this."
It's then, at the reminder of what happened, that the pain comes back. He gasps and jerks in Stephen's grasp, one hand still on his face, while the other is somewhere out of his sight. It's only now that Tony really sees Stephen, kneeling down beside him on the frozen floor. Something red flutters into his line of sight and Tony smiles at the Cloak in his delirium.
"-ony. Tony!" Another gentle slap to his cheek and Tony focuses back on Stephen's face, his expression almost frantic now. "Tony, I need you to tell me how to open the suit!"
His thoughts feel like thick honey and when the question finally registers, Tony tries to reach the handle himself, but can't even lift his arm without groaning in absolute agony.
"Left…side.", he gasps out and Stephen springs into action immediately, feeling along his left side to find the small handle at Tony's hip, almost invisible if you don't know what you're looking for. A moment later, the suit opens with a hiss and freezing cold air hits Tony's skin. Maybe he imagines it in his pain filled haze, maybe he doesn’t, but for a long moment, Stephen just stares at his body in what looks like utter shock, before he swears violently.
Tony is so surprised about seeing the doctor’s usual composure slip that he doesn’t notice the Cloak wrapping around his shaking body. That is until he accidentally presses too hard on his chest and Tony almost screams in absolute agony. He can't look down at whatever wound there is, but he vaguely remembers Steve slamming his shield down and that can't have gone without any damage.
Without the armor, the cloak easily lifts him up from the floor and slowly floats towards a portal Stephen conjures. Tony can't see much of what's on the other side, but it looks suspiciously like the medbay in the Compound.
"My suit!", Tony gasps when they're almost on the other side. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Stephen make some hand gestures, before the broken armor is coated in orange light and suddenly vanishes. Tony has half a mind to wonder why Stephen hasn't just done the same with him in the suit, but then they're through and the portal closes behind them.
"Friday, keep the place on total lockdown and call Helen Cho.", Stephen says as the Cloak gently deposits Tony an examination table. The warmth of the medbay almost feels scalding on his frozen skin and the moment his back touches the soft leather of the table, his chest screams out in agony. Stephen has been talking to someone somewhere to the side, but is suddenly directly in front of him. Tony can't make sense of what he's saying to him, so he just stares at his face and tries to will the heavy black spots in his vision away.
The doctor looks frantic now, but the sudden ringing in Tony's ears drowns out whatever he's saying. The last thing he sees is Stephen's eyes widening in panic, before he slips into blessed unconsciousness.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The first spark of hope in weeks comes in the form of no other than Ant-Man knocking on their front door. Not that Tony is present in the moment that it happens. Finally being declared completely physically healthy again by Bruce, he takes the opportunity and goes out for a flight in the armor.
It has been weeks since he looked at it and even longer since he touched it. Shoving the detachable Arc Reactor with the Mark L nanoparticles into Rogers’ face didn’t only have the purpose to vent out his anger. Some part of him wanted to get rid of the suit, to get the reminder of his failure out of his line of sight. Of course, Rogers tried to give it back to him, through Bruce mind you, but Tony just put it in his closet and ignored it ever since.
Some might call it fate that he decides to put it on again on the day Scott Lang sets their plan of saving the universe into motion, but Tony doesn’t believe in superstition.
It’s still fairly early in the morning when Tony goes in for his weekly checkup with Bruce and the doctor finally gives the clear for the stab wound in Tony’s side that has been stubborn to heal since Captain Marvel fished the Milano out of space.
Everything he physically obtained from their fight with Thanos has now healed, even though it doesn’t feel like it. The phantom pain will probably stay forever, not to mention the part of his chest that constantly feels like a gaping wound, even though nothing is there and the arc reactor has been removed years ago.
There's been an itch under his skin ever since he came back to earth, but until now, the grief and loss and his physical injuries have overshadowed everything, above all his will to do anything else than lie in bed or on the couch all day, staring at the ceiling or the TV without really watching.
Today though, after visiting Bruce, Tony feels better. Not good by any means, but better than usual and so he opens his closet and stares at the Arc Reactor containing his armor for a solid minute before placing it back on his chest where it’s supposed to be.
He turns around and stares outside. The weather is great and in the distance, he can see Nebula and the Cloak taking a walk around the premises. It has become a ritual for the two ever since Bruce ordered the weekly checkups to be without any companions.
Turning around, Tony makes a decision and walks out of the Compound on the opposite side. The Milano is still standing unused and damaged in the middle of the lawn and he walks around it to be sheltered from view. Tony knows that he can do whatever he wants, but even though Bruce cleared him just an hour ago, the doctor won’t be amused to see him flying around in his armor already. Somebody will see him flying away, but by then, he’ll be safely up in the air.
Tapping the Arc Reactor once, nanoparticles glide over his chest and down his arms, but by far not as smoothly as usual. He didn't bother to repair the nanotech after their fight on Titan, but it's still functional enough for now for a short flight.
Once the suit closes around him and Friday gives him a status report, Tony almost laughs at the way nothing but his repulsors are functioning right now. But since any villains have been uncharacteristically quiet since Thanos came to earth, he doubts he'll be caught up in a fight any time soon.
Giving power to his thrusters, he lifts up into the air and comes to a stop high above the Compound. Far below on the ground, Nebula looks up at him and with a salute, Tony is off, racing through the sky and sighing in relief when he's finally above the clouds and there's nothing to see but a white ocean.
He hovers there, for a while, just staring at the clouds moving and catching a breath for the first time in weeks. This high, he can almost pretend everything is okay, that when he'll dive through the clouds some time later, Peter will be back from school and waiting for him in the tower, excited to tell him about his day. They would probably call up Stephen to pester him into buying pizza for the three of them, spending the afternoon in the workshop or in the vast library of the Sanctum.
It takes a while for Tony to notice the tears on his face and when he does, a sob wrenches his way out of his throat. He hasn't allowed himself to cry since all of this mess started, but now that tears are streaming down his face, he can't stop them. The grief of losing Pepper and Happy and Peter and Stephen is finally catching up with him and he is absolutely not prepared for it. At least this high up in the air and in the suit, Friday is the only one that can see him.
The clouds are still moving forward, reflecting the sun beautifully. Tony stares at them and sobs, the white blurring before his eyes. He can't remember the last time he broke down like this, he never really allowed himself to after his parent's deaths.
But this was inevitable, reaching his breaking point. Everyone has been walking on eggshells around him for weeks now, even Rogers, and now Tony knows why. Apparently, he isn't that good at pretending anymore.
It’s minutes later, when Friday wordlessly shows him the notification of an incoming call on his HUD and he scrambles to get his bearings. It’s Rhodey, and even though his best friend has seen him in worse states, Tony doesn’t want him to worry. More than he already does anyway.
Friday connects the call when he gives the go, but turns off the video feed. Tony is sure Rhodey would only need to take one look at him to see he's been crying.
“Honeybear, what can I do for you?”
"Tony, where are you?", Rhodey asks and frowns. "And why can't I see you?"
"The suit is still damaged. And I'm just taking a flight."
Rhodey stays silent for a long moment, before apparently deciding that whatever he called for is more important at the moment.
"We need you to come back immediately.", Rhodey says and his tone of voice is enough to send Tony's heart pounding. Something serious is happening when it's not Rhodey that's calling but Colonel James Rhodes.
"Ant-Man is back."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The amount of times Tony woke up to a white hospital ceiling in his life can't be counted on two hands anymore and he isn't sure yet if that's something he should worry about.
It's warm this time, when he wakes up, and pain is only a hazy sensation in the back of his mind. His body feels stiff and when he turns his head a little, the skyline of upstate New York greets him outside the window. He's in the Compound.
Heaving a sigh of relief, he closes his eyes briefly. Tony never wished for a heavy concussion before, but a bit of amnesia would have been nice right now. Instead, even with the strong painkillers he must be on, he remembers every detail about that bunker and the fight and he wishes he wouldn't.
Taking a shuddering breath that sets his chest on fire when he inhales too deeply, Tony turns his head away from the window and spots the red fabric on his legs. For a moment he looks at it in stunned surprise, before reaching out and rubbing the fabric gently. He's never been more glad to see the Cloak, especially when it wakes up and flutters off his legs in excitement, only to settle gently over his chest instead, snuggling in under his chin.
Tony laughs softly, fighting a new wave of pain, before his eyes set on the chairs beside his bed, occupied by two sleeping figures.
Peter and Stephen.
They both look exhausted, as if they haven’t slept in days and Tony’s chest aches at the sight. Peter’s head is pillowed on Stephen’s shoulder, showcasing how close they’ve gotten in recent months and Tony needs to close his eyes for a moment.
In that bunker, in that split second where Rogers swung down the shield, Tony thought that that was it, that he wouldn’t make it out of there alive. Everything after is a hazy memory and he isn’t too sure if Stephen really came to rescue him or if that was just a fever dream, but what still clings to him is the panic he felt in that frozen bunker, the paralyzing fear of never seeing him or Peter ever again.
His eyes are still clenched shut when something suddenly touches his hand. Tony’s eyes shoot open in surprise and land on Stephen, now awake and as disheveled as Tony has ever seen him. His hair stands up in several directions and there is a shadow of a beard on his face while he’s wearing normal streetwear that is rumpled and not even remotely close to his usual sorcerer robes. Peter is still sleeping peacefully in the chair beside him.
“Tony”, Stephen says then, almost in amazement. He squeezes his hand and only now does Tony notice the absence of gloves on the other man’s hands. Thin scars run along the back and down every finger, testifying how disastrous that car crash was. Tony doesn’t know how to feel about the fact that Stephen is apparently comfortable enough around him to forego his gloves.
“How are you feeling?”, Stephen goes on, oblivious to Tony’s staring.
“Like someone slammed a shield into my chest.”, he jokes and is rewarded with a small, amused smile from Stephen, however involuntarily it might be in this situation. It’s then that Peter mumbles something in his sleep and moves around a bit to get more comfortable in the hard plastic chair. Tony looks at the teenager and feels a fondness expand in his chest that he has been trying to push away, in fear of letting Peter close. But now, vulnerable as he already is, he lets it sit where it is, emotional about the fact that this boy cares enough to wait by his bedside for him to wake up.
Stephen follows his gaze and Tony’s breath stops at the fond smile on the other man’s face as he looks at Peter.
“He’s been waiting for you to wake up since the moment I brought you back, refusing to go anywhere until he’s sure you’re fine.”, Stephen says and looks back at Tony. “Not even his aunt could get him out of this room.”
At that, Tony laughs softly, immediately regretting it when sharp pain erupts in his chest. He gasps and screws his eyes shut, trying to breathe through the pain, concentrating on Stephen’s hand in his to distract himself.
“Just breathe Tony, it’s okay.”, he hears Stephen say beside him, not letting go of his hand and squeezing in reassurance.
“Okay Doc, tell me.”, he gasps when the worst pain has subsided. “How bad is it?”
Stephen looks back at Peter once, making sure he’s still asleep, before he stands up and sits on the edge of Tony’s bed, not once letting go of his hand.
“I don’t know how much you remember, but Friday called me from Siberia.”, Stephen starts. “It was basically just an emergency signal with the coordinates of your location.”
Stephen looks down at their hands and the Cloak still covering him. “When I got there… It was bad. You basically fell unconscious the moment I got you out of the armor. I brought you back here, to the Compound, and called Helen Cho. It was the first time in years that I cursed the loss of my hands.”
Stephen smiles without any joy, looking up when Tony squeezes his hand.
“Thank you, Stephen. For saving me.” For a moment, they just look at each other and Tony barely resists the urge to smooth back the unruly strand of hair that always seems to be hanging on Stephen’s forehead. Then, Peter mumbles something in his sleep again, successfully breaking the moment.
“I know you have been trying to keep him out of everything Accords-related, but that boy is smart as hell and more perceptive than we give him credit for.”, Stephen says and looks back at Peter. “He knew something was wrong and waited here for you to come back even before Friday called me.”
“He’s too good to be caught up in all this mess.”, Tony sighs. “I was only barely able to keep him away from Berlin and I purposefully didn’t tell him about Siberia. He might be Spiderman, but at the end of the day, he’s just a kid that isn’t supposed to be caught up in all this adult bullshit.”
They look at Peter a moment longer in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. When Tony shifts to get more comfortable and pulls at some injury, he winces and stills, unconsciously squeezing Stephen’s hand that he’s still holding.
“I’m sorry, you’re not due another shot of pain medication for another hour.”
Tony winces again and gives up on getting comfortable. He feels like there’s not one single position that wouldn’t hurt right now. “Okay Doc, please be honest. What’s the diagnosis?”
Apparently contemplating for a moment if he should really tell him, Stephen sighs and stands up, moving back to the chair beside Peter. “You have a concussion and several heavy bruises. Your left arm is broken, your right leg almost. As for your chest…”, he stops and looks at the heavy bandages. “Your ribs are shattered and you almost lost your right lung. It was pure luck that it didn't touch your heart at all."
Silence hangs heavy in the air after that, Stephen looking at their hands while Tony just stares at the other man, taking in his furrowed brows, the dark circles under his eyes and his unkempt hair. He has never looked more beautiful.
“So…”, Tony starts, then. “I’m going to be just fine, right?” Stephen just looks at him, not saying a word.
“Remember the time I was held in a cave in Afghanistan for three months and came back with a damaged heart and an electromagnet in my chest? Captain America is nothing compared to that.” Tony isn’t sure if he wants to reassure Stephen or himself, but it doesn’t matter when he hears the small huff of laughter from the sorcerer.
“Yes, you’re going to be alright.”, Stephen says then, looking up at Tony with a small smile and a squeeze of his hand.
Tony doesn’t feel alright right now, nor will he probably be for some time, but looking at Stephen and Peter beside his bed, watching how Peter slowly wakes up and almost tackles Tony when he realizes he’s awake, he knows he’s going to be fine.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Apparently, Scott Lang is a genius.
Okay, no, scratch that sentence, Tony is still the smartest man in the room, besides Bruce, but without the man with shrinking abilities, he would have never even thought of time travel.
He knows it’s possible, or it was when the Time Stone and Stephen Strange were still existing. But now that both are gone, time travel didn’t even cross Tony’s mind. It still doesn’t really, but Scott Lang is the living proof that it’s possible.
Tony comes back from his little flight expedition and breakdown in the clouds to a room full of everyone currently living at the Compound.
The moment he touches down beside the Milano and lets the suit settle into the housing on his chest, the cloak settles back around his shoulders, followed by a disapproving look from Nebula for using the armor, before they make their way to one of the conference rooms.
Scott Lang is in the middle of giving an account of what happened to him when Tony enters the room and Bruce immediately starts to talk science to him, explaining how Scott shrunk himself so much, he got stuck in the quantum realm for what was months in their dimension but only a few seconds for him.
After months of touching nothing in his workshop, not even his suits, Tony needs a moment to come out of that funk and get his brain back on track. But once it is, once he really listens to what Bruce is saying, his heart starts pounding.
From the sloppy calculations he quickly makes in his head, it sounds possible to use the quantum realm to travel through time.
No one is really understanding much of what he and Bruce are talking about, but Tony doesn't really care. Having a real possibility to bring half the universe back sounds like a dream, but he can do nothing against the hope unfurling in his chest. And he sees it on the others' faces too. After months of not being able to do anything, they all grasp this chance like a lifeline.
It's the first time Tony sees some of the other heroes in days, for Clint it's even been weeks and he gets it, he really does, so when he sees the raw hope in the archer's eyes, he swears he'll do anything to make this work and when he looks at Bruce, he knows he's thinking the same.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Tony keeps the stupid phone, although he tosses the even stupider apology letter - that sounds more like an accusation - in the trash the second he reads it through.
Barnes is still a sore spot for him, but Tony doesn’t blame the man, never has. He would talk to him, if possible sometime in the future, and clear things up, maybe even take away some of the overwhelming guilt the man must be feeling for everything he has done as the Winter Soldier.
Steve Rogers is a whole different subject, though, one that still makes Tony livid and maybe always will. The only people even more angry than him are probably Stephen and Rhodey, meeting for the first time shortly after Siberia and instantly bonding over their shared hatred for Captain America. Tony isn’t sure yet if he should regret ever letting them meet. Until now he doesn’t.
After Stephen’s rescue in Siberia, they become close, even closer than they already were beforehand. The Sorcerer Supreme introduces himself to Peter’s aunt May when she comes to visit Tony in the medbay and is almost inseparable with Peter after that, taking him to school and picking him up at noon and almost constantly spending his time at Tony’s bedside, until he’s finally cleared to move back to his tower after three weeks.
Even then, Stephen comes over daily, sometimes with Peter, who comes by as often as possible too, but most days only with the Cloak. Friday locks Tony out of the lab for the first week after he’s back in the tower, but it doesn’t really matter when the Sorcerer Supreme makes him breakfast in the morning and stays for dinner in the evening, helps Peter with homework and chats with Pepper in her breaks.
It’s hard not to fall completely and utterly in love with him and by the time months have gone by and Tony is physically recovered from Siberia, the realization that he loves Doctor Stephen Strange is simultaneously surprising and also something he has known deep down for a long time.
He keeps it like a secret though, locks it in his heart and guards it like the precious truth it is. Stephen is incredible, one of the best people Tony has ever known, and he feels undeserving of him, glad to be able to keep him as a friend, but sure telling the sorcerer how he feels will shatter everything.
So Tony keeps silent and continues enjoying the life he has now. One without the Avengers - a fact that is painful but bearable when he thinks about everything that led them to this point - but with Stephen and Peter as new additions to Pepper, Rhodey and Happy.
It’s a year after Siberia, while on a run with Pepper, that his whole life turns upside down again.
It starts with Stephen opening a portal in the middle of Central Park, only to have Bruce-I fucked off to space years ago-Banner step through and greet him with a sheepish smile. Tony is glad to see him, but it’s also weird explaining everything that happened since Bruce left. The green tinge of his skin is satisfying to see when Tony shortly talks about the reason the Avengers no longer exist, but he also knows that he has to use that damn cellphone nevertheless after what Bruce told him of that so-called Thanos.
Turns out planning an intervention is already much too late, when Thanos’ lackey suddenly comes knocking at their front door in a ridiculously donut shaped spaceship.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Building a time machine is something that has never even crossed Tony’s engineering mind at all ever since he built his first circuit board at age four. It was just something that seemed impossible, and even if Tony liked to defy that usually, time travel always just felt a tad too close to magic for him to be comfortable with it.
But as several times before, Stephen Strange changes everything.
Maybe it’s the Time Stone Tony never once saw him without, but more than that, it’s the way Stephen wields magic, makes it look anything but effortless. And Tony now knows it isn’t, after hearing of Stephen’s story and the way he crawled back out of his misery to build his life back up from the ground to become the Sorcerer Supreme. A title he takes pride in but doesn’t necessarily want, something he thinks he needs to grow into and become worthy of.
Building a time machine brings the team back together. More or less. Tony still doesn't talk to Rogers and doesn't plan to, but they need his and Thor's strength to do the heavy lifting. Even Clint is helping, finally having a new goal, new hope in seeing his family again. Tony remembers when the archer let them meet his wife and kids. The way Clint looked at them and Laura, Tony will probably never understand the grief he's feeling.
Or maybe he understands a little too well. He sees a bit of himself in the archer whenever he thinks about Stephen and Peter and Pepper and Happy. It’s been months and the grief is still so raw, Tony feels like he’s bleeding out, slow and agonizing, from a wound that won’t ever heal.
Now though, instead of wallowing in the pain, helpless and hopeless, like he did since that disastrous day on Titan, Tony throws himself into work, spends sleepless nights doing calculations with Bruce and surprisingly Scott, who knows a lot about the quantum realm and is a genius with computer tech.
During the day, they spend their time putting together what they’ve come up with during the nights, trying to involve everyone in the process, giving them something to do.
It takes them five days and nights and several failed test runs to complete the time machine. When the sun rises on the sixth day and Tony pulls the last screw tight, sunshine glints off the metal in a way that makes it look unreal. He steps back between the rest of their team and for a very long moment, no one says anything and just stares.
The machine is rather ugly, nothing about it looks beautiful or sleek in any way, but it doesn’t matter. As long as it functions as they want, it could look like something straight from a dump and Tony wouldn’t care a bit.
It can be felt in the air, as they stand there, the hope an almost tangible thing. During their development of the machine, they’ve come to the conclusion that simply going back in time to prevent things won’t help their universe at all. Tony can’t fully believe it yet, but giving Bruce and Scott the benefit of the doubt, apparently every time they change something in the past, instead of having an effect on their present, their actions will just split into new universes, proving the multiverse theory science has been dancing around for years now.
So instead of just changing the past, they collectively decide to gather the Infinity Stones anew. Splitting off into teams, Tony, Nebula and the Cloak are going to retrieve the Soul Stone in 2014, while Steve and Scott are going back to 2012, shortly after the Battle of New York, where the Space Stone in the Tesseract and the Mind Stone in Loki’s scepter are coincidentally residing simultaneously. That leaves the Reality Stone in the hands of Thor and Rocket, who are going to travel back to Asgard in 2013, where it resides in the body of Jane Foster, while Bruce, Clint and Natasha will retrieve the Time Stone in 2012 from the Sorcerer Supreme.
Finally having a mission again, a collective goal, sets their heads back on straight and pulls them out of the depression they’ve all been in for the last few months. They give themselves a break of a day, to gather their energy and make the last necessary preparations.
In Tony’s case, he finally repairs his armor and even makes some last minute upgrades to his and Rhodey’s suit. Friday won’t have access to the internet where he’s going and sending her with Rhodey or anyone else won’t help them much because of the simple fact that her connecting to anything in the past would either alert Jarvis or possibly even a governmental institution. Tony still installs her in Rhodey’s suit, just because he feels his best friend will be safer with her when he can’t be there.
A day after finishing the time machine, the team gathers around it at dawn, determination on everyone’s faces. It’s now or never, their one chance at getting this right, at hopefully bringing half of the universe back and destroying Thanos once and for all in the process.
The suits of the whole team are very similar to the outfit Scott usually wears as Ant-Man, since they’re using the same Pym Particles that shrinks and lets him grow in battle. Since Hank Pym was unfortunately wiped out too during the snap, their supply is small and just enough for a round trip for every member of the team. Mistakes would be fatal, not only for the universe, but for themself too. Being stuck in the past without a way back doesn’t sound very fun at all.
Putting their helmets on, they all step onto the platform of the time travel machine simultaneously. The Cloak squeezes Tony’s waist in reassurance from where he’s squeezed under Tony’s suit. Since no one, not even Stephen, knows much about the Cloak, they don’t know the effects time travel will have on him, so their best guess at keeping him somewhat safe was stuffing him under Tony’s suit.
Nebula grabs his hand just before Bruce pulls the lever that starts the whole process of shrinking and plunging them into the quantum realm. Just like the Cloak, she squeezes his fingers in reassurance and then they’re off, shrinking and rushing off with a gut lurching sensation. The last thing Tony sees is Bruce jumping back onto the platform just in time.
In the blink of an eye, they leave the present and stumble out in the year 2014 on Vormir, home to the Soul Stone. When Tony recovers from the dizziness and nausea time travel apparently inflects, the last person he expects to come face to face with is Red Skull.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Peter follows him and Stephen onto the donut shaped ship and the only thing keeping Tony from panicking is the awful sight of Stephen getting tortured by that ugly lackey of Thanos’. He can’t afford a panic attack until he knows the doctor is safe, and only then can he succumb to his fear while also berating Peter for following him into a battle much too dangerous for him.
Between their two genius level intellects and Peter's additional ingenuity, they come up with a rescue plan rather quickly, setting it into motion the second they’re at least 51% sure it’ll work.
Just a few minutes later, Stephen is exhaustedly kneeling on the ground, trying to catch his breath, while Tony fixes the huge hole they ripped into the ship to get Thanos' lackey sucked out and Peter nervously fusses over the Sorcerer Supreme, the Cloak not far behind in his worry.
It's when Tony crouches down beside Stephen, trying to make sure the other man is still in one piece, that Stephen stands up on shaky legs with what's supposed to be a reassuring smile, the Cloak settling back on his shoulders. He takes Tony's hand for a second and squeezes and Tony is not sure if the gesture is meant more for him or Stephen himself. He squeezes his fingers back and feels his hand shaking, more than the usual tremor.
Peter has been moving over and looking at the control devices of the ship while Tony makes sure Stephen is okay, and when he's about to touch something, Stephen snaps out of whatever bubble they're caught in and magically slaps the teenager's hand away.
The ship seems to be set on some kind of autopilot, taking them to a location called "Titan", probably some planet or another, and Stephen almost immediately tries to figure out how to change the setting and fly them back to earth. Tony silently sits down on a pile of rubble and just observes the man for a moment. He knows he could probably figure out the systems of the ship, but for the last few minutes, another idea has been forming in his head.
“Can you get us back, Tony?”, Stephen asks then, turning to where he’s sitting. Instead of answering, he just keeps staring ahead, his mind still pondering.
“Tony?” Stephen is closer now, standing right before him with a worried look on his face.
“I don’t think we should. Go back, that is.”
Even Peter turns back to him at that, but Tony is focused on Stephen’s disbelieving expression.
“Tony.”, he starts, his face as serious as Tony has ever seen it directed at him. “Under no circumstances can we bring the Time Stone to Thanos.”
“That's not what I'm saying. I think we should take the fight to him. Surprise Thanos before he can surprise us.” Maybe he starts to sound a little desperate, but in that moment, with only Peter and Stephen to see him, he doesn’t really care.
“I don’t think you quite understand what’s at stake here, Tony.”, Stephen says and he sounds annoyed now, almost angry, and Tony is not sure whether it’s directed at him, but it only spikes his own irritation.
“I don’t think you quite understand, Stephen.” Standing up, he closes the few feet separating them. “Thanos has been inside my head for years. Since he sent an army to New York. And now he’s back!”
Absentmindedly, he feels a corner of the Cloak reaching over to squeeze his clenched fist and Tony grabs it like a lifeline. Stephen’s words have felt like a slap to the face.
“I don’t know what to do!”, he says, desperately, and sees Stephen’s eyes soften. “I honestly don’t know if it’s better to fight them on earth or wherever this ship is taking us, but you saw what they did Stephen! What they can do!”
Looking down at their feet, that are now almost touching with how close they’re standing, the fight leaves Tony with a long sigh and sagging shoulders.
“At least in his territory, he’s not expecting it.”
Feeling a touch on his other hand and thinking it’s the Cloak too, Tony is surprised to see Stephen squeezing his fingers. In apology or whatever, he doesn’t know. Looking back up, the expression on Stephen’s face is now one of pure exhaustion and Tony squeezes his hand back.
They’re still in this together and for a second, both of them forgot.
“Let’s bring the fight to him.”, Tony says, quietly now.
For a moment, they both say nothing. Not even Peter can be heard wherever he is somewhere beside them.
“Alright Tony. We go to him.”, Stephen eventually agrees, although still reluctantly. Tony is quick to understand why when he continues speaking.
“But you have to understand. If it comes to saving you or Peter or the Time Stone, I won’t hesitate to let either of you die.” Just saying the words seems to pain Stephen more than Tony understands, so he just squeezes the hand that starts shaking in his own.
“I can’t, Tony, because the universe depends on it.”
For the first time since they’ve known each other, there are tears in the doctor’s eyes and Tony feels a suspicious wetness in his own.
“I know.”, Tony says and untangles his right hand from the Cloak to take Stephen’s second. “It’s okay. I understand.”
They keep standing like this for a long moment, just looking at each other, when Peter suddenly clears his throat to get their attention.
“Ehm, I don’t mean to interrupt anything, but we’re getting close to something.”
Letting go of each other, Tony and Stephen walk over to the window Peter has apparently been looking out of and see the ship entering the atmosphere of a greyish planet that seems completely abandoned.
When they touch down on Titan, more a crash landing than anything else, there’s already another space ship only a few metres beside their own.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Okay, so technically they come face to face with the Red Skull only after climbing a mountain for two hours, but after the shock of encountering him, it could’ve also been immediately after they touched down on Vormir.
Nebula doesn’t seem to know him, but Tony needs a second to register that they’re really standing in front of Rogers’ old archnemesis, better known as Johan Schmidt in World War II.
For a terrifying moment, Tony imagines what would have happened if Steve had come here instead of him and Nebula. The Soul Stone would have been all but lost to them.
“Welcome.”, Schmidt says and takes down the hood covering his skinless head. “Anthony, son of Maria. And Nebula.”
Tony looks over at the blue-skinned woman at that and sees an almost satisfied expression on her face. He doesn’t know much about her past, but she’s the daughter of no one and least of all Thanos.
Red Skull leads them to the edge of the mountain, weapons trained on his back at all times, and lets them stare down the endless abyss carved out of the side of the mountain. The bottom is almost completely obscured by darkness and snow and fog, but a fall from this height would definitely be disastrous.
“What you seek lies in front of you.”, Schmidt says ominously. “As does what you fear.”
“The stone is down there.”, Tony realizes and leans over the edge, looking down at the ground far below them.
“For one of you.”, Schmidt flows in front of them, however that works. Maybe he’s really just a ghost or a very realistic projection. “In order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange.”
“A soul for a soul.”, Nebula murmurs, but Tony hears her anyway and shudders at the implication. Completely ignoring the red-faced asshole, Tony pulls Nebula aside.
“I’m jumping.”, Nebula says before Tony can even get a word in. He chuckles humorlessly. Nothing about their situation is funny in any way.
“You won’t.”, Tony answers seriously and pulls the housing of his armor from his chest. “I’m obviously the better choice. Do you know all the things I’ve done in my life? My nickname was “Merchant of Death” at some point, I think that says it all.”
“I believed in Thanos. I was loyal to him.” Nebula says it with such conviction, so sure that that’s reason enough for her death, that Tony is frozen for a moment, scowling at her.
“Well, I think we’re at a dead end here. So…” Walking a few steps to lay the armor down on a rock, Tony turns his back to Nebula.
The moment he sets it down, he turns around and starts to sprint, right for the edge of the cliff.
“Now!”, Tony shouts at the Cloak still clinging to his shoulders and when he looks back for a split second, he has wrapped himself around Nebula, preventing her from following him.
“TONY!”, she screams and he squeezes his eyes shut, as if that could drown her out somehow.
With a last deep breath, he stares straight ahead at the dark horizon, ignoring Johan Schmidt still standing silently at the edge of the cliff, and takes a big leap that would bring him straight down the mountain. If it wasn’t for the pair of arms snaking around his waist at the last possible second.
Nebula grabs Tony and throws him down beside her and before he can react in any way, she jumps over the edge and drops out of sight. Panicking, Tony taps his chest, but then remembers how foolishly he put his armor down.
“Cloak!”, he screams and the red fabric needs only a second to recover from where Nebula wrenched him off herself, before he shoots over with the housing wrapped in one corner of his fabric. By then, Tony is already standing again, slams the case back on his chest and doesn’t even wait for the nanobots to cover him before he jumps after Nebula.
She’s already a great distance away but the fall is low. By the time Nebula is halfway down the cliff, Tony is encased completely in his armor and grabs her, flying her up and dumping her on a small rock ledge.
“I won’t let you throw away your life for me!”, Tony shouts, irritated, and puts the faceplate up. Icy cold wind is whipping at his face, blowing snow and ice into his hair. Nebula doesn’t react to his words and just stands up calmly, staring him down. The Cloak has flown down to them, hovering nervously a few feet above their heads, not wanting to lose either of them.
“I’m going to be the one giving my life and you won’t stop me.”, Tony says, staring right back into Nebula’s piercing eyes. Anyone else would call her emotionless, but Tony can see right through every emotion in her eyes. His heart aches and he softens. He knows exactly how hard this is for her because he feels the exact same things.
Fear, anger, hopelessness that there’s no way both of them will make it out of this alive.
“I’m sorry. You’ve become very dear to me.”
Before he can overthink it too much, Tony taps the housing on his chest and the armor retracts. It only takes a second for him to be falling again. but it’s enough for Nebula. She throws herself on him, putting her arms and legs around him like an overgrown koala.
“What are you doing?!”, he screams, panicked, against the rush of wind in his ears. But then, they’re abruptly stopped by something grabbing one of Tony’s flailing arms and the sudden change in gravity is enough for Nebula to be wrenched away from him, one hand on his chest, pulling the housing of his armor off. More instinctually than anything else, Tony throws his other arm out and grabs Nebula’s hand.
For a second, they’re safe, so he looks up and sees the Cloak, hovering in midair, struggling to carry them both, his fabric almost slipping on Tony’s slick hands.
“Nebula.”, he says and looks down at where she’s already staring up at him, her eyes pained. “Give me the armor. I’ll fly us back up and we’ll find a way. No one has to die.”
Tony knows it’s probably a lie, but he doesn’t care. There has to be another way.
“This is the only solution.”, Nebula answers, as if reading his thoughts.
The housing of the armor still in one hand, she wrenches her other out of Tony's and then she’s falling, closing her eyes, her arms spread wide.
For a second, Tony is frozen still, staring after her in disbelief. But then, the Cloak flies the few feet up and deposits him on the rock ledge, before speeding after Nebula.
It’s too late though.
With the armor, Tony might have been fast enough to catch her, but the cloak is just too slow, meeting too much resistance with the wind and snow nipping at his fabric.
“NEBULA!”
The moment her body connects with the hard stone below will forever haunt Tony’s dreams. It’s only a small mercy that he’s too high up to hear the impact.
After a few minutes, the Cloak flies back up and presses the housing of the armor back to his chest, before settling on his shoulders, snaking around him like a blanket. Tony just stares though, completely numb to his surroundings and the warm tears flowing down his face. He doesn’t even notice the big hole expanding in the sky, plunging everything in a bright white light, before Tony’s world turns completely black.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
After touching down on the wasteland of a planet, they're almost immediately ambushed by the so-called Guardians of the Galaxy.
A hostage situation and a confusing conversation later, they all realize that they're after the same goal of defeating Thanos and decide to band together for the time being.
Formulating a plan with strangers that are more than questionable in their behaviour is almost impossible, but they somehow come up with something that feels like it could work.
While Tony is in discussion with the Guardians and Peter, Stephen sits a few metres away from them and activates the Time Stone. He doesn’t specify what he’s doing, only says that he needs a few minutes alone without any disturbances, so Tony tries to keep their other companions occupied for the time being.
Upon hearing they’re from earth, Quill, who has been living in space since he was a little boy, has a lot of questions, mainly about music, and his friends are equally interested. Peter is happy to indulge them, so Tony leaves him to it when he notices Stephen snapping out of whatever trance he was in.
Walking over, he’s just in time to catch Stephen from stumbling off the rock he’s sitting on.
“Easy there.”, Tony smiles and holds Stephen steady by his forearm. The doctor looks like he’s seen a ghost, his eyes haunted by something the Time Stone has shown him.
“Is everything okay, doc?”, Peter suddenly asks behind them, coming over with the Cloak and the rest of the group.
“I went forward in time to view alternate futures.”, Stephen says, his eyes not leaving Tony’s. Where their hands are still clasped, he squeezes Tony’s fingers, almost painfully. “To see all the possible outcomes of the coming conflict.”
“How many did you see?”, Quill asks, his tone of voice indicating that he isn’t sure if he really wants an answer to that.
“14.000.605.” Stephen looks far away as he says it, eyes trained on something unspecific in the distance. Tony squeezes his hand back in reassurance, waiting until his eyes focus back on him and the present.
“How many did we win?”, he asks then, when he has Stephen’s full attention.
For a very long moment, Stephen just looks at him, very intently, not saying a word. Tony can’t quite decipher the look in his eyes or the expression on his face. Something between hopelessness and determination, pain and admiration, almost adoration, so contrasting that it takes Tony’s breath away.
“One.”, he says then and Tony feels like he’s missing something, like Stephen wants to tell him more than that, but doesn’t know how to. No one asks what he saw and Stephen doesn’t tell them. Maybe he can’t or maybe he doesn’t want to in fear of jeopardizing the one chance they have.
When Peter’s spidey sense signals him something is coming, they don’t have time to talk any longer and quickly get into the positions they deemed the most logical in their earlier made up plan.
Stephen welcomes the purple alien alone, four stones already glittering on that ugly golden gauntlet of his, and then they fight.
They fight like their lives depend on it, because they quite literally do. This will determine the fate of the universe. If they lose here, Thanos will take the Time Stone and will move on to earth, where Vision is bearing the last stone he needs.
They fight and they almost have him, using Stephen’s portals to attack him from all sides, and when he’s finally on his knees, the gauntlet almost off, Quill ruins it all.
In retrospect, Tony can’t even fault the man. Learning about your lover's death in the middle of a battle can spur a lot of drastic and dangerous actions, but in this case it dooms the whole universe.
Punching Thanos in the face in his rage, Quill shakes the already unsteady hold Mantis has on Thanos’ psyche, resulting in her losing her grip. In less than a heartbeat, Thanos comes back to himself, shakes off the rest of them and reclaims hold on his gauntlet.
It doesn’t even take a minute for everyone to be beaten unconscious and when even Stephen’s breathtaking strength isn’t enough, Tony is the last man standing. He knows he can’t beat him on his own, not even with his nanobots and Friday and the best armor he owns.
When the suit is too damaged to cover his whole body and Thanos stabs him in the side with part of his own armor, Tony thinks that is it, that’s how he’s going to die, with Peter and Stephen watching on some godforsaken planet in some insignificant part of the universe.
He closes his eyes and waits for the finishing blow to come, grimacing in pain as the dagger moves further into his flesh. Thanos quite literally sits him down on some piece of rubble and says something Tony can’t make out over the sudden static in his ears. When he opens his eyes again, against his better judgement, Thanos has the gauntlet aimed straight at him, the stones glowing dangerously.
This feels like an execution, Tony thinks and refuses to look away. Let him see his last breath, how the life will leave his eyes, and let it haunt him for the rest of his pathetic existence.
“Stop!”, an all too familiar voice shouts then, only a few feet away. “Spare his life…”, Stephen pants, a nasty wound on his forehead dripping blood into his eye. “And I will give you the stone.”
Thanos is silent for a moment, observing Stephen’s crumbled form, before training his gauntlet-clad hand on him. “No tricks.”
Through some serious black spots in his vision, Tony sees Stephen shaking his head and panics. He can’t do this, he promised not to do this, told him on that godforsaken donut ship that he won’t, can’t, trade the stone for anybody, not even Tony or Peter.
“Don’t!”, Tony manages to say with blood clocking his nose and mouth, making it hard to breathe. He locks eyes with Stephen and sees his own desperation and panic mirrored.
From god knows where, Stephen summons the Time Stone, without his usual casing, and lets it float over to Thanos with shaking hands. Without being able to do anything, they watch as the purple titan places the green stone on its designated spot on his gauntlet, green light surging through him a moment later.
Tony doesn't know what he would have done next and he's glad he doesn't have to find out, when Quill, apparently awake again, suddenly tries to attack one last time, only for Thanos to disappear in a blue portal before Quill even comes anywhere near him.
Not even able to muster the strength to feel angry at Quill right now, Tony just looks over at Stephen, feeling a pang of worry in his chest at the state the sorcerer is in.
"Why would you do that?", Tony asks, still a little desperate, and sees the pain, the absolute agony in Stephen's eyes.
"I can't let you die. Not ever." For a moment, he looks away, squeezing the fabric of the Cloak still hanging on his shoulders, a little torn and beaten. When he looks back, there's steel in his eyes and such a contrasting vulnerability that Tony's breath catches in his throat.
"We're in the endgame now."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Tony wakes up to the Cloak nudging him in the side, his fabric drenched in water. He’s looking up at the dark sky of Vormir and only notices that he’s floating in shallow water a second later.
Sitting up, he has a moment of severe disorientation, before everything comes rushing back and he gasps. There’s something extremely warm in the palm of his right hand and when Tony sits up and opens it, a small orange stone is glowing back at him. The Soul Stone.
Having it in his hand only means that they succeeded and Tony doesn’t know if he should scream or throw his meager breakfast back up. If this is how they’re going to win, he won’t enjoy their victory.
The Cloak wraps around him as Tony sobs through his grief, freezing in the cold water of whatever lake he's sitting in at the base of the mountain.
It's time to go, he knows that. The time machine will pull them back on its own if he doesn't go himself. But he needs this, even if it's only for a moment. Back in their time, he needs to be strong, for Stephen and Peter and the battle to come. But here, on this lonely planet, in this lonely part of the universe, he can be weak for a second.
When the last light leaves Vormir's horizon and Tony's face and feet and hands slowly go numb from the cold, it's time to go back. He lets the Cloak pull him out of the water, before the fabric squeezes back under his suit. They’re both drenched from head to toe, promising at least a cold in the coming days. Not that there aren’t more pressing matters right now.
They’re ready just in time to be pulled back, landing on the platform of the time machine only a split second later. The whole team looks ecstatic, stones in various colours glowing in different hands. No one notices him at first.
He throws the Soul Stone in the middle of the group and pulls his helmet off. Everybody stills at the sudden noise the stone makes as it connects with the platform and rolls on, coming to a stop in front of Clint’s feet.
“Tony?”, Rhodey asks carefully when he wordlessly unzips his suit so the Cloak can free himself and settle on his shoulders.
“Tony, where is Nebula?”, Bruce asks then, urgently and worried.
Without a word, Tony points at the orange stone, letting them guess what happened, and turns around. He can’t deal with this right now, their pitying and concerned expressions. So he just decides not to, pushes everyone away and everything so far down, to where all the other shitty stuff from the last few months is residing, that it’ll only come back up at random, if he’s lucky.
He's never been lucky before, though.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Thanos leaves and then it's just them, their little group of aliens and humans in varying degrees of needing medical attendance.
Tony and Stephen are probably the worst off out of all of them and Peter and the Cloak flutter around them nervously and worried. The ship they stole from Thanos' lackey is all but destroyed, same goes for the Guardians', so their only way back to earth at the moment is Stephen and his portals. An orange spark is the only thing he can summon right now, though.
Neither Friday nor Karen have any connection to their allies on earth, not that Tony expected anything else with the way they're millions of lightyears away. It makes him anxious, not knowing what's happening on the other side. If Thanos gets the last stone from Vision, it would mean the end to their universe as they know it.
Without any way to know the time, they sit and wait. Either for Stephen's powers to regenerate quickly enough to get them out of here, or for Thanos to win. Tony knows what he prefers, even if that would mean another fight on another planet, but at least they would be home.
It starts vaguely half an hour after their defeat, with the Guardians exclaiming that they're feeling weird, that something is happening. Besides the injuries he already has, Tony doesn't feel anything else, so he lets his gaze wander over to Stephen in confusion, who now just looks resigned, like he has already given up.
It's that alone that lets the panic creep in. Dread in the back of his head tells him whatever is happening won't be anything good, that it's the sign Thanos has won.
Tony stands up, the wound in his side screaming in agony despite the nanobots he closed it with. There's an urgency in his movements he doesn't quite understand. He needs to do something, but what is there to do if he doesn't know what's going on?
“Something’s happening.”, Mantis repeats and then just turns to dust, right in front of them. Tony can’t believe his eyes as Quill grasps at the now empty space beside him, where he has been holding his friend just a second ago.
For a moment, Tony thinks he’s just dreaming, caught in some hazy fever caused by the nasty wound in his side. Or maybe Thanos really killed him and this is some kind of afterlife. But then, Peter is grasping his shoulder and holding him up and he knows this is real, realizes it with a kind of overwhelming panic spreading from his chest to the rest of his body.
Mantis disappears and then it’s Drax, first his right arm and then, with a sudden gust of wind, the rest of his body. Quill just watches his friends go, frozen in shock and hopeless to do anything about it. Then he turns around, looks at Tony and Peter for a second with such a pained expression, that Tony feels a pang of sympathy and grief for this man he has known for all but two hours.
Just a few feet in front of them, Quill turns to dust and is blown away, and then they’re all gone, as if none of the Guardians have ever been here, on Titan, fighting beside them.
Peter stumbles away from him in shock at what’s happening, so Tony turns around to him, ready to reassure the kid, even if he knows everything is going to shit right now. But before he can even say a word, he catches Stephen’s eyes and stops in his tracks, another spike of dread punching him in the gut.
He knew this would happen, saw it in the 14 million futures he went through, and he probably also knows who’s going to stay and who will disappear.
“Tony.”, Stephen says and looks at him with so much guilt, like he’s personally responsible for what’s happening just because the Time Stone has shown it to him.
“There was no other way.” There are tears in his eyes as he shakes his head in despair, looking at Tony as if he’s about to rush over, to reassure him, to stay by his side, but just as he stretches out a hand, his fingers fall apart, then his hand and his whole arm. In less than a second there’s nothing left of Stephen but the Cloak and Tony is rooted to his spot.
Maybe if he stops moving, maybe if he just closes his eyes for a second, everything will be fine again. But then he remembers Peter with a sudden desperation and spins around, searching the wasteland around him for a familiar red and blue suit.
He finds it, not far from him, but something seems wrong when Peter stumbles towards him in panic.
“Mr. Stark…”, Peter mumbles and looks at his hands. “I don’t feel so good…”
Tony follows Peter’s eyes and looks at the kid’s hands, but they’re still whole, as is the rest of his body. A terrible thought pops into Tony’s head just as Peter’s body slowly starts to disintegrate, far slower than what they’ve seen so far.
What if his mutant body and his spider-y powers somehow change this- this process or whatever you want to call it. Peter feels things on another level with his senses far more developed than those of a normal human.
Trying not to panic himself, Tony tries to reassure the kid, but Peter doesn’t even hear him as he mumbles incoherently about not feeling well and stumbles into Tony’s arms, clinging to him like he’s the only thing still keeping him in this world.
“Please, I don’t wanna go! I don’t wanna go!”, he cries, as his shoulders and hands slowly turn to dust. Tony clings to him just as hard, as if he could keep Peter with him just through sheer willpower alone.
Losing his strength, Tony sinks to the floor and gently lays Peter down, clasping his hands. For a moment, the teenager looks at the sky, his gaze far away. When Tony squeezes his hands, he looks back, his eyes sharp and brimming with tears.
“I’m sorry.” Peter’s voice is so quiet, Tony almost doesn’t understand him. The moment he speaks the last syllable, his body turns to dust all at once, leaving Tony grasping at thin air, his hands covered in grey soot.
When he looks around a moment later, shell shocked and probably traumatized, there’s only him and that blue lady left, Nebula or whatever her name is.
In the end, despite everything Stephen said on that spaceship, he still gave up the Time Stone, and his life, for Tony.