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She hadn’t meant for this to happen. She was smarter than this, especially after she and Gary had ended. It wasn’t acrimonious, and it wasn’t like they didn’t see each other when he had to cover the new guy’s shift at the school but it was still painful to know they couldn’t work things out. She was happy alone, she didn’t have to share food, time, or space with someone else.
Then you’d walked in, bright-eyed with a mischievous grin on your face. A new teacher to help take over the third-grade class. You weren’t a new teacher; you weren’t fresh out of college. You’d been teaching around Philadelphia, mostly substitute rolls before you’d decided to settle into this role. She’d tried to ignore you, tried to not pay attention to your witty comments, and tried not to enjoy that every Friday you brought in a homemade cake.
Then you’d walked into the teachers’ lounge wearing a black and white Philadelphia Flyers Sherpa coat, with your matching hat, cheeks flushed from the cold. You’d smiled at her as soon you’d seen her. You’d rummaged through your little backpack before placing a Flyer’s water bottle on the table.
“Heard you tell Mrs. Howard that your bottle was leaking, I saw this at last weekend’s game and I figured why not?” You had shrugged, the smile never leaving your lips. “I hope this one doesn’t leak all over your marking, Miss Schemmenti.”
She’d stared at the bottle and then back at you as you retreated to sit at the table in the corner. Usually, you sat alone, reading a book until it was time for you to go to the classroom. She’d seen you sit with Janine and Jacob at lunch, both you and Jacob seemed close. She’d often found you talking to him in his classroom, both swept up in a conversation about Star Trek or Star Wars or whatever the latest thing you were both watching was.
“You like Farmer’s Markets?” She had called out to you, watching as your eyes filled with surprise as you looked up from your book. “I’m going Saturday, Barb comes sometimes, you should join me.”
Your smile had lit up the entire room and Melissa knew she had lost whatever battle she was internally holding. You’d joined her at that Farmers Market and had been to everyone since then. You’d joined her and Barbara on bottomless brunches and she’d even convinced you to invite Janine and Jacob to one of them.
Then she’d started to invite you for dinner. She’d found out that you had been the daughter of two loving but troubled parents, both of whom had battled alcohol addictions. You had spent your younger years as a chaotic mess before breaking out of the cycle and trying to make something of yourself. You’d married young. You were twenty when you walked down the aisle with your childhood sweetheart. Two years later she’d walked out of the door and into the arms of someone else leaving you broken. Now eight years later you were content on your own and more than happy to have dinners at Melissa’s.
Everything she learned about you had made her fall for you harder. You were funny. Kind. Beautiful. You were sarcastic and would happily yell at the TV with her at stupid reality TV shows and sports games, even if you didn’t quite understand football.
Barbara had picked up on her crush which was quickly and terrifyingly hurdling toward love. Trying her best to talk her friend into asking you out. Melissa stated she couldn’t risk the friendship and that you were happy alone and weren’t looking for a relationship right now. Each time the conversation ends with Barbara giving her a disapproving look.
***
She shook her head to clear her thoughts as she walked towards the Teacher’s lounge carrying coffee for herself, Barbara, and you. It had become a once-a-month tradition that one of you would bring in coffee for the others on the final Friday of each month.
She used her foot to open the door and was greeted by Barbara smiling up at her from the table as she placed her coffee down in front of her. She looked over at you who was sitting talking to Jacob intently about something.
“Morning Hon.” She greeted as she placed the coffee down in front of you. “Having fun?”
“Morning Schemmenti.” You answered as you happily grabbed the coffee and brought it to your nose, inhaling the strong scent. “You are a goddess.”
“Don’t let your girlfriend hear you say that.” Jacob snorted and Melissa froze at the words that left his mouth. “She might get jealous.”
“Shut up, she wouldn’t get jealous, I don’t think she gets jealous.” You paused in thought before taking a sip of the coffee and wincing. “Oh wow, that is very hot.”
“That’s what you’d say about her being jealous too.” Jacob teases and you stick your finger up at him as he gasps. “Don’t be mean.”
“Don’t tease me then.” You stuck out your tongue and looked up at Melissa. “Thank you for this though, I love our Friday coffee treats.”
“Sure thing.” Her smile doesn’t quite meet her eyes as she walks away from the table to sit next to Barb as your conversation with Jacob continues.
“Are you okay?” Barb asks concern evident as she takes in Melissa’s pained expression on her face. “I overheard the conversation...”
“She didn’t even tell me she was dating anyone; did she tell you?” Melissa asks, throwing off her jacket and pulling the black sleeves off her jumper down. “She was literally at my house on Tuesday and didn’t mention a thing.”
“Maybe she was waiting to tell us this weekend at the Farmer’s market?” Barbara offers, watching as her friend deflates further. “I’m sure she had her reasons.”
“Maybe we’re just not as friendly as we thought.” Melissa shrugs, taking her coffee from the table and sipping it. “Either way she seems happy.”
“Mel.” Barbara shakes her head as she looks at her friend. “We both know, we’re very close to Y/N and she will have her reasons for not telling us.”
“What are you talking about?” You ask as you move from Jacob’s table to join Barb and Melissa, smiling at both of the women as you place your flyers coat on the back of your chair, you brush down your blue blouse as you sit down. “Anything interesting or are we saving all our gossip for the farmers market?”
“We’re talking about...” Barbara begins and narrows her eyes as Melissa cuts her off by standing suddenly.
“I’ve got to go…grade things.” She winces at her sudden inability to lie and grabs her coffee and jacket as she practically runs out of the room, leaving you and Barbara sat watching the door close.
“Is she okay?” You ask, concern filling your eyes as you look at Barbara. “Kristen Marie didn’t try to make Nonna’s ravioli again, did she?”
“She’s okay.” Barbara smiles at you. “She had to go grade some tests she’d forgotten about.”
“That’s not like her.” You stare down at your coffee cup, eyebrows furrowed. “Maybe I should go check on her.”
“Leave her for now.” The older teacher looked at you and you narrowed your eyes. “All will be revealed.”
“If, you’re sure.” You tap your fingers on the table, concern still evident. “If, you’re sure.”
***
The Farmer’s Market was busy as always. The three of you walked through the market chatting, you wearing your oversized Flyer’s hoody and skinny jeans, Melissa in a signature leather jacket and tight black leather pants, and Barbara in her usual cardigan and flowery shirt combination. Melissa waited with bated breath every time you opened your mouth for you to confess you were seeing someone but it never came.
She began to grow annoyed. She didn’t know why you were keeping this from her. Did you not consider her a friend? Did you think she wouldn’t be happy for you? She would support you in anything you wanted to do. She would meet the new girl who had won your heart and try to be nice to her at least, no doubt Barbara would make her be pleasant.
“You’re very quiet over there Schemmenti, you’ve not once criticized my choice of tomatoes.” You grin at her, but your grin falters as a smile doesn’t appear on her face. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” She shrugs and ignores Barbara’s frown. “Just been a long week you know?”
“I do know.” You nod, as you look forward. “It’s been an interesting one!”
“Oh, something to tell us?” Melissa looks at you with her eyebrow arched as she senses Barbara’s internal groan. “Got a secret you need to reveal?”
“Err, no?” You state as a confused look settles on your face. “Nothing new here other than Jacob and I contemplating heading to a Fan Expo in June, we have the perfect outfits matched out, I’m going as Bo-Katan and he is going to be a droid, he would be a perfect droid.”
Melissa shakes her head, expression becoming gloomy as you continue to talk about your plans with Jacob. She doesn’t know why you’re lying to them. Why does Jacob get to know about your love life and you’re not willing to tell her? She knows you both attended the board game night on Wednesday which you’d found at the local coffee shop near your apartment. Maybe you met her there. Maybe you were ashamed of having older friends. Maybe you didn’t like the way Melissa had a guy for everything. Maybe you thought she was shady and didn’t want her to meet your friends.
“Melissa.” Barbara sensing her inner turmoil knocked her out of her thoughts. “That’s a great idea, taking Jacob to the Fan expo as a robot...”
“A droid.” You correct quickly, a blush settling on your cheeks as you let your full nerd come out to play.
“Sure, sounds like great fun.” She rolls her eyes and you frown at her. “You’ll have fun, I’m sure.”
“Yeah, you know it.” You smile slightly but it fades quickly, taking in Melissa’s attitude. “Just seemed like some harmless fun, it’s nice to have someone whom I can share that with.”
“Yeah, I’m sure you’ve got more than Jacob to share that stuff with.” She scoffs, and you stop walking, frowning. “I’m sure you do.”
“Melissa,” Barbara warns, stopping Melissa in her track.
“Have I done something?” You ask quietly, eyes down at the grown as you begin to fidget, picking at your fingers. “If I have, I’m sorry, I’ll stop talking about the Expo.”
“No, no you haven’t kid.” Melissa sighs, forcing herself out of the funk she was in over you dating someone. “Come on, tell me more about the Expo, I’d love to hear more about the droods.”
“Droids.” You grin, as the smile appears back on your face. “Okay, so this is the plan…”
***
Melissa had spent the rest of the weekend convincing herself that you had a reason for not telling her. Maybe you were worried that she didn’t think this woman would be good enough for you, which was likely. Maybe Jacob had found out accidentally and it had just come out in the staff room. Either way, she was ready for this Monday morning. She was ready for things to go back to normal.
Until she walked into the staff room and saw you showing your phone to Jacob. The woman on your screen was beautiful. Short Blonde hair, abs of steel, and a serious expression on her face. She faltered as walked towards you, desperately wishing she could walk back out of the room.
“I want to marry her, I’m serious.” You sit back in your seat and place your phone down. “Honestly, she’s replaced my cat as my wallpaper, this is how serious I am.”
“I want to be invited to the wedding.” Jacob laughs as he sits back in his seat. “In fact, I want to be the best man.”
“That could be arranged, I’d have to ask her first, which might be a little difficult.” Melissa watches as you snort and Jacob agrees with you. “I gotta stop falling in love with older women, it only ever gets me in trouble.”
She was older than you. Maybe that’s why you wouldn’t talk to her about this. Melissa’s mind was still stuck on that photo, clearly a gym selfie. The woman was gorgeous, older, and fit, Melissa couldn’t compete with that. Sure, she was older but she wasn’t, she wasn’t in the gym enough to look like that. She didn’t think she could look like that if she was in there 24/7.
You liked…loved this woman enough to marry her. How long had this been going on? Melissa sat down at her usual table, unwilling to greet you this morning as her mind raced with questions. How did you meet her? Did you meet at the gym? Did she bring you coffee like she did? Could she make you laugh like she could?
She doubted it.
“Hey Mel, I didn’t see you come in!” You beam at her from across the room as Jacob waves in greeting. “I’m already looking forward to our next Farmer’s Market trip, still on for Tuesday night dinner sessions, my turn to cook?”
“No actually, I’ve got plans with Kristen Marie Tuesday now and Saturday, Nonna, and Vinnie have asked me to go over and help them with the house.” She lies, as your smile falters again and her heart begins to ache. “Sorry, another time though.”
“It’s no worries, I know you’re busy.” You nod and she knows you don’t quite believe her. “I’ll make a terrible lasagne by myself.” w
It’s obvious to Melissa that you expect her to laugh but instead, she looks away, digging through her bag, and brings out a magazine she’d brought on the way to work. She knows she’s hurting you. She knows you must feel the coldness coming from her but she doesn’t understand.
Don’t you realize you’re hurting her too?
She watches as you quietly pack your bag and leave the room, a sad smile on your face as you greet Barb as she walks in to sit by Melissa. The older teacher watches as you leave before she looks at Melissa and Jacob, who are looking at her from the table.
“What did you do?” She asks, a disapproving glare on her face. “Why does that girl look like you broke into her apartment and kicked her cat?”
“I just told her I couldn’t make our dinner plans or the Farmer’s Market.” Melissa refused to look at Barbara or across at Jacob. “I can’t help that I have plans.”
“You’re being an idiot and I will not stand by and watch you hurt that girl.” Barbara stood and moved to leave the room. “You’ll regret this, Melissa.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about Barb.” She lies as Barbara leaves the room; she can feel Jacob’s stare. “Stop looking at me.”
“She thinks you hang the moon in the sky, you know?” Jacob revealed as he stood up to leave the room and find you. “If you like her, you should tell her.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.” Melissa snarled as she slammed her magazine down on the table. “Say another word about this and so help me God..”
Jacob raised his hands, eyes widening and he quickly fled. Melissa sat staring out across the empty teacher’s lounge, sighing.
This was going to be a long week.
***
She’d managed to avoid you for most of the week. Choosing to eat out in her car to avoid you, Jacob’s knowing looks, and Barbara’s glares. She couldn’t face you. You were prepared to propose to someone she hadn’t even been introduced to.
You’d sat by her side as she had talked about Joe and Gary. When she had admitted to being in a long-term relationship with a woman before Joe. How Meredith had left her some random dude who grew grapes for wine in California.
She had told you things she hadn’t told anyone, not even Barb. You lit up the room when you entered. You made dinner nights at hers feel like she was dining at the Ritz. You made her life feel exciting. You made her feel like she could do anything.
But you weren’t in love with her like she was with you.
So, she avoided you. On your Tuesday night dinner, she ate alone and tried not to feel your loss. She came to work the next day and gave Barbara an extra portion of the chicken she’d made but didn’t leave you any. She avoided you down the hallways. She no longer stopped by your classroom and on Saturday she planned to attend the Farmer’s Market.
Perfect.
Soon enough, the week was over and she found herself alone on a Saturday morning, Barbara unwilling to attend without you and refusing to be a part of Melissa’s idea to avoid you until you confessed or she got over her feelings for you.
She stood in front of the small stall containing fresh herbs and spices, wearing her Eagles hoody and a pair of lounge pants, hair tied in a messy bun, debating over which spices she would pick up today. She knew she was moping, the lack of effort she’d put in today for the Farmer’s Market reminding her of such.
“So, did they cancel or were you just lying to my face?” You ask, softly from behind her, voice full of hurt. “I mean feel free to continue ignoring my existence like you have all week.”
She freezes at the sound of your voice, swearing under her breath as she turns around to face you. You look tired, that’s the first thing she notices like you haven’t been sleeping. You’re wearing jeans that look like they’ve seen better days and what she assumes is a Star Wars-themed hoody.
“I wish you’d just tell me what I did so I could at least try to fix this Mel.” You clench your eyes shut, willing the tears away. “I don’t know what I did to make you hate me this much that you feel the need to lie about having plans.”
Melissa stays silent as you open your eyes, tears falling down your cheeks as you rub at them with the sleeves of your hoody. You shake your head and huff out a laugh.
“No one will tell me; Barbara just tells me that you’ll talk to me when you’re ready but how long am I supposed to wait.” You push a hand through your hair as you look at her. “It’s maddening and it hurts; please will you just tell me what I’ve done.”
“You know what’s maddening and hurts?” Melissa suddenly fumes as she walks towards you and away from the table. “Finding out your friend wants to marry their girlfriend through an overheard conversation, you won’t even tell me and Barb you’re dating someone but you’re happy to talk about marrying them in the middle of the staff room.”
“What on Earth are you talking about...” You trail off as realization hits you. “Melissa, I can explain…”
“No, you had time to explain, you come here acting as if I hurt you, well guess what, you hurt me too, you lied to me.” Anger overtook her. “I know I’m not likely as eloquent as your little girlfriend or as fit looking but I’m a good person and I thought I was your friend, I deserved to know!”
“Mel, will you please let me explain!” You pleaded as she began to storm away back towards her car.
“You had time!” She yells as she leaves you stood in the middle of the Farmer’s market, people trying their best not to stare.
You stand helpless, watching as she drives away before you let out a frustrated groan.
You were in love with an idiot.
***
Melissa sat on her sofa, a glass of wine in her hand and popcorn on her lap, watching the Alien Marathon on the horror channel. She’d turned her phone off after the second time you’d tried to call. She couldn’t talk to you right now, she needed time. She knew she’d messed up. She shouldn’t have gone to the Farmer’s market but she didn’t expect to see you there. The hurt looks on your face and the hurt tone in your voice are still in the back of her mind.
What could you possibly say though to fix this? What excuse could you come up with for not telling her that would make sense?
She heard her door unlock and frowned. She knew that Barbara had made plans with Gerald to go to dinner tonight. She knew you would never pull Barbara away from spending time with her husband, especially after his cancer scare.
Instead, her eyes widened as you walked in, carrying a cardboard cut-out that she couldn’t quite see yet. You dumped your backpack on the floor and placed the cardboard cut-out to the side. You huffed as you looked at her.
“You’re an absolute idiot and I wish you’d just asked me and Jacob what we were talking about the first time you heard the conversation.” You sighed. “I managed to catch Barbara before she and Gerald left for dinner, she lent me the key and thanked me for deciding to sort out this mess.”
She opens her mouth to speak but you hold up your hand to stop her and reach for the cut-out turning it around. She’s faced with the woman whom she’d seen on your phone. Younger than she’d looked on your phone, with blonde hair slightly longer, wearing a green tank top and cargo pants.
“Meet Katee Sackhoff, star of Battlestar Galactica and The Mandalorian.” You introduce a small smile on your face. “She plays Bo-Katan whom I’m planning to cosplay for the Expo, Jacob and I have been watching the Mandalorian together after the board game nights, he has to put up with me fangirling over Bo-Katan and professing my love for her.”
Melissa’s mouth opens and closes as you look at her in amusement.
“I’ve had a crush on her since I first fell for her in Battlestar Galactica, this cut out lives in my spare bedroom, hence why you’ve not seen her, every time you’ve been over to mine you’ve never been in the room to see her and I’m guessing you didn’t watch either of the shows I mentioned.” You look at Melissa fondly as she shakes her head. “I’m not getting married, I’m not in a relationship and I’m not ashamed of you, if I met someone, I liked you’d be one of the first people I’d introduce them to but that’s not going to happen Mel.”
“Why?” She croaks as embarrassment overwhelms her when it hits her that she’d been envious of a fictional character.
“Because the only person I want in this room is you.” You confess. “I’d choose you over Bo-Katan, Kara Thrace, or Katee Sackhoff any day, Jacob knows that too.”
“You like me?” Melissa stands suddenly, placing her wine and popcorn on the coffee table. “You want to be with me?”
“Mel, I’m in love with you and I have been since the moment I walked into the Teacher’s lounge and you rolled your eyes at me, I love you, I want you, I’ve been waiting for you to make the first move so I knew I wasn’t just going crazy.” You reveal as she moves to stand in front of you. “The only person I want is you.”
“I look nothing like her, I don’t have abs.” Melissa winces at the vulnerability in her voice and you shake your head.
“I just want you.” You move forward and press your lips against hers, tasting the salt of the popcorn and the sweetness of the wine. “Just you.”
Melissa wraps her arms around your waist and pulls you in closer, the Alien film night forgotten as you’re finally in her arms. You break the kiss and lean your forehead against hers.
“I can’t believe you got jealous over a fictional character.” You let out a small laugh as Melissa groans in embarrassment. “You gabortz you could have just asked.”
“Never say that again.” She snorts as she moves to look at you, cupping your cheeks as she presses her lips against yours once more before moving back. “I know, I know, you have permission to make fun of me for the rest of our lives.”
“You promise?” You ask eyes shining as you look into hers. “That I’ll get to make fun of you for the rest of our lives?”
“Only if you promise to love me even when I’m being an idiot.” She smiles as you let out a laugh. “Especially now I’m going to have to actually watch any of the new Star Wars shows.”
“I will love you even when you’re being an idiot, I will love you always.” You say earnestly and her heart swells. “You’re the only redhead I want.”
Melissa kisses you again.
Maybe this week hadn’t been too bad after all.