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"Before the two of you say anythin', my answer is yes."
Roy, who'd been gearing up for some big speech, shuts his mouth with an audible click. Keeley, beside him, is so stunned she forgets to close her mouth at all. Jamie tries not to look so pleased at having figured this out all on his own, and for having caught them off guard, but, well, he's no idiot, despite what Roy might think. He's noticed the way Roy and Keeley have been looking at him lately, all strange and suspicious like. No one else had believed him about it, but he'd known he was right when Keeley'd called him to meet her and Roy at the cafe she knows he likes.
"How did you even—"
"The two of ya aren't exactly subtle, eh?"
"So you... you're really saying yes?" Keeley's looking at him like Christmas has come early.
"What didya think I'd say? No?" Jamie scoffs.
There's this look on Roy's face like that's exactly what he expected. Jamie blinks, and almost laughs. He doesn't though, because he's nice and he can tell that this moment is important to Roy, who's got his shoulders tensed up like he's got to take a shit (emotionally). Jamie's nervous about it, of course, but he knows it would be absolutely mad to turn them down.
Keeley pats Roy's arms comfortingly, a soft look playing about her eyes. "We weren't really sure what you'd say, Jamie. Neither of us have ever done this before. I mean, there was that one time when me and Shandy almost—" Cue an eyebrow raise from Roy, "—Never mind that. You said yes!"
"'Course!" As if he'd say no. "This is the two of ya we're talkin' about. I'll need to do some research though, won't I? Never done this kind of thing before either. How's it work, for me? What do I need to do?"
Roy snorts. "You're not interviewing for a fucking job, Jamie."
"I know that, old man—"
"Oi—"
"But this is special, innit? Can't exactly halfarse this, can I?"
Keeley suddenly looks close to crying, so Jamie assumes he must've said something right. Even Roy looks surprisingly... soft. Bordering on tender, even. It's a little frightening now, this. He'd known it would mean a lot to them if he'd said yes, since they'd been tiptoeing around asking him for about a week, but still, to see the magnitude of it reflected in their gazes is a bit much. Jamie begins wondering if he's maybe accidentally stepped into something he very much isn't prepared for.
Thankfully, before he can second guess his decision any further, the bell above the door jingles and breaks the uncomfortable silence that had enveloped their table.
"Hola, Jamie! Oh, and hola Roy and Keeley!"
The image of Dani's smiling face descends on them like the first rays of the sun after a long night. Then Sam steps out from behind Dani and his smile is like something Michelangelo would've carved out of marbel. Jesus, these two are really something else.
"Hello, boys! What brings you here?"
Dani steps up behind Jamie and places a hand on his shoulder. "We are here to pick up Jamie! Tonight we are having dinner at my place. I am cooking tamales for Sam and Jamie, and then we will make dessert together!"
"Last week it was Nigerian food at my house," Sam pipes up from behind Jamie's other shoulder. "Jamie almost set fire to my dish towels."
"Almost. Y'can't be mad about almost crimes."
Sam rolls his eyes, but it's done with enough fondness that it lacks any actual sting. "When it's your turn to host maybe I'll almost set fire to your dish towels, and then we will see who can and can't be mad."
"Ah, but I don't have any dish towels, do I? So there."
Dani gasps, half scandalised. "You don't have any dish towels? We must go buy some!"
"Having no dish towels is a crime in and of itself, Jamie." Sam shakes his head, sighing.
Jamie frowns, then shoves at the both of them until they're all laughing. He forgets they're not alone until Keeley coughs in that half polite half impatient way she always used to do when they were dating and wanted his attention but didn't want to trouble herself to actually ask for it.
"Oh, the three of you were still in the middle of something, weren't you? We're sorry to have interrupted. Come on, Dani, we can wait outside." Before any of them can say anything, Sam's got Dani by the hand and is practically dragging him out of the store. Dani manages a small wave before they're out the door.
They don't end up going very far. Jamie watches as they move to stand in front of the shop's windows, beside the door, their backs facing him. They'd said they would come by to pick him up if they decided he was taking too long with Roy and Keeley, but Jamie hadn't expected them to actually come. Or to wait outside for him like this either. His eyes linger on them for a little longer, watching as Dani talks and Sam listens with a smile on his face. Their hands are still joined together.
When he turns back around, Keeley's smiling a touch too wide to be natural and Roy's got his 'thinking' face on. Jamie panics, for a moment, wondering if maybe they'd seen something there accidentally.
His fears are realised when Keeley leans forward and grabs his hands, eyes lit up something fierce. "Jamie, are Dani and Sam—?"
Ah. Fuck. Sam had wanted to keep it a secret for a little longer. Jamie winces, knowing that the cat's well and truly out of the bag, and makes a note to get Sam something pretty later to make up for failing to keep the act up. It's not terrible, though, that Keeley and Roy know now. If anything, he might even be a little relieved. Keeping a secret from them had been much harder than with the rest of the team.
"It's kind of a new thing, yeah? Sam wanted to keep it hush hush for a bit. Didn't want too much fuss. No one knows 'cept for, well, us. And the lads on the team who were smart enough to figure it out on their own." Bumbercatch and Jan Maas. Then Colin, somehow.
Keeley giggles, the way she always does when hears gossip, then looks out the front of the shop again. Jamie doesn't need to look to know what she's seeing. Dani's probably looking at Sam like he's hung the moon and the stars, and Sam's probably got that lovesick smile on his face. The two of them get kind of intense, when they're like that. Then again, Jamie's been told he can get pretty intense himself, so maybe he doesn't have any room to talk.
"You've been doing dinners with them?" Roy asks. He's got this look on his face though, like he's confused about something.
Inwardly, Jamie's proud his Roy expression translating has progressed so far. Outwardly, he shrugs. "Yeah. Dani's idea. Loves to cook, him. We were goin' over to his place for a while, but Sam thought it wasn't fair to have 'im hosting us all the time, so we decided to start trading off." Next week they'll all be at Jamie's place, which he's honestly a little nervous about. Compared to Dani and Sam, he has a lot less to offer in the kitchen. It doesn't help that english food doesn't exactly hold up very well on its own.
Keeley and Roy exchange one of those looks, the ones which make it seem like they're reading each other's minds, or maybe just sharing the same one.
"Babe," Keeley starts. Christ, what had he done to deserve a babe with that tone? "Don't you think that you might be... bothering them?"
"What? Who?"
"Dani and Sam."
"Why would I be botherin' em?"
"You're being a third wheel, you idiotic prick. Those two are just too fucking nice to tell you to fuck off."
There's a beat, a pause where no one makes a sound, and then Jamie is doubling over in laughter. He laughs so hard he doesn't hear Roy's "Oi!" or see Keeley's confused little frown. He doesn't stop laughing until Roy reaches out to whack the back of his head.
"Ow! The 'ell was that for?"
"You were being a prick!"
"No I wasn't! Not my fault the two o'ya misunderstood."
"Misunderstood what?"
"Hang on, let me just—"
Jamie walks over to the door and brings Dani and Sam back inside, then holds one of their hands in each of his before bringing the three of them round to Roy and Keeley's table. Keeley's looking at their joined hands with wide eyes, and Roy's got a look on his face like he's swallowed a lemon.
"Boys, listen to this. These two think I'm third wheeling ya on your date nights." Jamie can't help but burst into laughter again.
Sam elbows Jamie in an attempt to stop his laughter, while smiling at Roy and Keeley apologetically. "Sorry about him. And do not worry, it's an easy misunderstanding to make. In fact, Richard made a similar mistake. Of course, he thought Dani and Jamie were dating and so assumed me and Jamie were having some sort of torrid affair behind Dani's back, which led to a strange few days involving a harrowing experience with an angry goat but anyway, the point is— Jamie, stop laughing— the point is that we understand how you might have been mistaken about our relationship. But we are actually together, all three of us."
Roy's eyebrows are raised so high they've practically disappeared into space. Keeley's mouth has gone back to hanging open, no sound coming out.
"Yes, we are very happy together, all of us!" Dani gives Sam and Jamie each a kiss on the cheek.
In return, Sam and Jamie lean in at the same time to plant a kiss on both of Dani's cheeks simultaneously. There's no reward quite like the joy in Dani's laughter.
"Wait." Roy's voice comes out strangled and quiet. "But—"
"Jamie... what did you think we were coming here to ask you, when you'd said yes earlier?"
Jamie blinks, now a little confused himself. "Thought you were askin' me to be the best man at your weddin', of course. The two of ya have been actin' strange lately, and Isaac said he saw ya in a jewellery store the other day, so I thought, y'know, y'must've proposed and now you were lookin' to ask me to be part o'the weddin'."
Roy drops his head onto the table with a thud, groaning into the wood. Keeley's now got her mouth closed and lips pressed so tightly together he's beginning to worry a little.
"Is that... not what you came here to ask me?"
Keeley shakes her head mutely.
"Then what were ya—" Jamie frowns, going through everything from the beginning again, and then comes to some sort of belated realisation when he recognises that Keeley's got one of her 'fuck me' heels on today. "Hang on, were the two of ya askin' me out?"
Roy groans again. Keeley eeps and covers her face with her hands, which means yes.
Jamie starts laughing so hard he begins to cry. Sam sighs and pinches his nose. And Dani, while still smiling, has narrowed his eyes slightly at Roy and Keeley.
"Sorry, sorry, 's just I'm surprised, 's all." Once Jamie's done laughing and Roy has finally lifted his head back up off the table, even Keeley seems to have managed to find the humour in the situation. "Flattered, of course, but uh, sorry grandad, 'm just not into ya like that. And Keeley, you'll always be the girl of my dreams, but I got my hands full with these two now."
There's a grunt of acknowledgement from Roy, and then a smile from Keeley, so Jamie expects that to be all, but then Dani steps up and looks at them and it's like a chill has entered the room. He's still smiling, of course. He's never really not smiling, but there's something about it that looks sharper than usual.
"Me and Sam do not like to share," Dani says, with the gravitas of making a threat. Roy's eyes are wide, and he nods, once. Keeley swallows and nods too.
As if a switch has been flipped, Dani's smile suddenly reverts to being as sunny and harmless as its always been. Sam shakes his head a little at the dramatics, but his grip on Jamie's hand is a bit tighter than usual. Jamie, meanwhile, is just wondering how he might get Dani to bring some of that energy into the bedroom.
"Sorry to have interrupted your talk, again. We will... go now."
Dani, Jamie and Sam exit the cafe hand in hand, leaving behind a still half in shock Roy and Keeley.
