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Then he broke.
That final event was all it took for Kurusu to realize no matter how many times he tried there was no way Akechi could be saved.
Then again, there was one possibility.
..
It had all begun in late January. Rather than the day Akechi sacrificed himself in the palace. That had happened months ago, and Kurusu was still grieving his death, but life was getting easier to manage.
Keyword: was.
When Maruki’s reality brought Akechi back to life Kurusu was overjoyed, but that would have to be put to an end soon.
Kurusu would defeat Maruki, and everything would return to normal. Along with normal Akechi would disappear.
Kurusu would lose Akechi a second time.
Just the thought of it made his heart ache like it did the day Akechi died.
One night however, the trajectory changed, the path he’d been following took a sharp left as a way to save Akechi presented itself. Morgana proposed a loophole. There was a way to return to the day Akechi died. Kurusu would have to be alone, but the day would replay just like it did. The Phantom Thieves would all be there along with Akechi, but Kurusu would have to find a way to prevent his death. Along with this, neither the Phantom Thieves from that day, nor Akechi know that this Kurusu is from the future making the task at hand harder.
Kurusu couldn’t turn down the offer even one more chance to save Akechi was enough.
Then Kurusu was back in November, in Shido’s palace, the large yacht, and the day was just as he remembered it.
Kurusu could never forget that day.
It was too similar.
The group explored the palace, and even up to the part where they fought Akechi, Kurusu hadn’t changed anything.
Kurusu held his breath as he heard the voice, the voice of another Akechi, the cognitive Akechi.
The said Akechi walked out, aiming a gun right at the fallen Akechi’s head.
A large group of shadows presented themselves as well, and there was no way they would all survive the fight. The chances were as slim as they could get, and Akechi knew that.
And just like that fateful day…Akechi sacrificed himself once more.
Akechi aimed the gun at Kurusu before turning the gun away from him, and towards his cognitive self, he took the shot before shooting the button that would lead the door to close. Akechi was now trapped behind a barrier with too many shadows for him to hold off.
Kurusu could only stare at the wall in shock as he watched the day play out a second time. He knew exactly what was going to happen next, and he wished there was a way to pause time.
Akechi murmured the same statements as before, “You should’ve abandoned me here a long time ago.”
It felt as if he stabbed Kurusu’s heart with that one.
Along with, “Let's make a deal, okay? You won’t say no will you?”
As if Kurusu had any other option.
Yusuke was the one who spoke up though with his own question, “Why at a time like this?”
“Change Shido’s heart,” Akechi requested, entirely ignoring Yusuke’s question, “In my stead…end his crimes.”
Kurusu looked down at the ground, “I’ll hold onto your glove…”
As the group panicked gunshots rang out from the other side of the wall. Kurusu felt his heart drop, his hands shook, legs wobbling, at this point there was nothing he could do.
It happened again.
Even when given the option Kurusu failed to change the past.
After a few more moments of silence, it was confirmed, “His signal is gone.” Futaba spoke.
Akechi was killed in an attempt to save everyone.
Kurusu returned back to the present, his heart feeling as if it broke a second time. However, he would be able to return back, and try again once more.
..
It was a cold wintry January night. The interior of Leblanc was just as cold as the outside. The sun set hours ago, and Kurusu still couldn’t sleep. The moon bright overhead, stars twinkling, the night was peaceful, calm, but too quiet. This silence made his mind wander, the thoughts of Akechi, and his death filling his brain to the brim.
Kurusu knew he’d have to try again.
There had to be some way to save Akechi in Shido’s palace. Kurusu must be able to play out one reality where Akechi lives. He must live… right?
Kurusu didn’t want to make a plan alone. He shot Ryuji a text late one evening asking him to stop by Leblanc so the three of them could plan.
Kurusu waited in silence, Morgana sitting in a chair at the counter by his side.
Then Ryuji showed up. The blonde gave Kurusu and Morgana a questioning stare as he took a seat in the booth. Kurusu fixed a cup of coffee, and he grabbed a sods for Ryuji before sitting down across from him.
Ryuji, his best friend, the blonde with short spiky hair and dark eyes, the so called delinquent that he “should’ve stayed away from.” Despite being prone to anger he cares a lot, he’s one of the most caring people Kurusu knows, and that's why he’s the perfect person to talk to.
“This is odd.” Ryuji commented, and in all honesty it was. If they were to hangout in the evening they were probably going out rather than staying at Leblanc, and discussions like this regularly involve all of the members.
Kurusu nodded, “Sorry. I have a favor to ask.”
Kurusu would rather plan with Ryuji rather than burdening or worrying the other thieves.
“Go on…you know I have your back.” Ryuji stated with a smile.
Kurusu nodded once more before he exhaled a quick breath.
“I have the ability to go back to the day Akechi died.”
There was a silence, a long pause before Ryuji’s expression changed. He was flabbergasted, eyes wide, his eyebrows raised, “For real?!”
Once again Kurusu nodded.
Ryuji scrambled to find his words, the entire weight of this ability, and the situation leaving his mind in shambles.
Kurusu took a sip of his coffee as he waited for a verbal response from Ryuji.
“I can’t tell if this is a good thing or not.” Ryuji sighed.
“Good.” I think, Kurusu answered, “I wanted you to help me plan.” He explained.
“Alright…go on…”
“The Akechi alive right won't be in a few weeks…you know that though .” Kurusu began with a simple explanation. Then a soft smile fell on Kurusu’s lips, “However, with this ability I'll be able to return to the day he dies, and I can try and save him. Then when Maruki’s defeated, Akechi won't disappear.”
Ryuji nodded before sighing obnoxiously, he placed his hands in a triangle shape on the bridge of his nose. Shutting his eyes before opening once more, “I want to help but what if you fail to rescue him? Then you’re just hurting yourself more.” Ryuji attempted to reason with the other.
Kurusu shook his head, “I’d hurt myself more if I didn’t attempt at all.”
Ryuji understood, “I see…alright, I’ll help you.”
Then their planning to save Akechi had begun.
“So…what exactly happens when you go back?” Ryuji inquired, this question would be the beginning to figuring out what actions needed to be taken by Kurusu to change the outcome.
If Kurusu simply retraced his steps, and replayed the day in the same way like he did last time, Akechi, of course, would die.
“The day plays out entirely the same, every action made, every word spoken, it is completely the same. Except for myself, this is what allows me to change the past. If we can find out what I need to change, then I can save Akechi.” Kurusu explained.
“I see. I don’t think you’d be able to persuade Akechi to leave the palace…so you’d have to change an event that takes place in the palace.” Ryuji offered up his own thoughts.
“Exactly.”
Then Ryuji was in a slump again, “Just what could it be though…”
“Well, we know that Akechi sacrifices himself when he comes face to face with his cognitive self and the shadows.” Kurusu stated. That was one of the changes they needed to make,
Ryuji nodded, he leaned back making himself more comfortable in the booth. Ryuji had his fingers place on his chin as he pondered, “Hmm…yeah…also remember there's still the fight with Akechi.”
“Right. The key to saving Akechi might be stopping the fight entirely.”
Ryuji quickly cut in, “Is that even possible?”
“I don’t know, but I have to try.”
“There has to be other solutions…” Ryuji continued.
Kurusu nodded, “I’ll try again. I’ll attempt to prevent the fight, and I’ll see if that changes the outcome. If not, ws should meet here again to discuss other options.”
Ryuji nodded.
It was getting extremely late. It was definitely past midnight by now. The coffee cup that sat on the table across from Kurusu was almost empty, and Ryuji was standing up to throw away his soda.
Kurusu stood up as well. This would be all they were able to discuss tonight.
Tomorrow Kurusu would try again in hopes that this time he’d be able to stop the fight against Akechi, hopefully, saving him.
As they walked towards the door another brief conversation struck up between the two of them.
“You’ll be okay right? Ryuji askes once more for confirmation, “You know you’re risking watching Akechi die over and over again. I don’t want to know what that’ll do to you…”
“I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”
Ryuji awkwardly laughed, “If I were able not to worry I would, but this is serious Akira.”
“I’ll save him.”
Kurusu declared this as he opened the door for Ryuji.
“I know you will.”
Ryuji responded, stepping out of the door. Then he was off, Kurusu waving him goodbye as he began to walk down the street.
Kurusu would save Akechi…there was no other option.
..
“Are you sure you want to try again?” Morgana inquired, he was worried about the overall well-being of Kurusu. Watching Akechi die once was damaging, but now he’s seen him die twice, and this may be a third time.
Kurusu gently caressed the fur of the cat as he nodded.
“I have no other option.” Kurusu confessed, his eyes were drawn away from where Morgana lay on the bed, and to the wall, “I’d regret it too much if I don’t at least try.”
Morgana couldn’t convince Kurusu to back down, and so he sent Kurusu back to the day Akechi died once more.
Like always it was all too familiar.
Kurusu has been here many times before, and this time he was even more determined to save Akechi. If that was possible.
Kurusu ignored the emotions beginning to bubble up, and instead he focused on the task at hand. How he was going to stop Akechi? He didn’t know, but he would have to find a way.
Kurusu still remembered the words he spoke, and maybe the correct response could deter him from foolish actions.
The group entered the assembly hall being met with Akechi soon after. The crow stood in the center as the group approached.
Kurusu held his breath for a moment as the shock washed over his friends, each surprised by the sudden appearance of him. Kurusu however, stayed calm, he waited for Akechi to begin his speech.
The all too familiar speech.
“…Under different circumstances we could’ve been great rivals… or perhaps even friends.” Akechi spoke his opinion aloud.
Kurusu stepped closer.
There didn’t need to be different circumstances for what they had, and he would make sure that was true.
Kurusu opened his mouth to respond but he was quickly cut off by Akechi who was speaking once more, “You don’t allow yourself to be enslaved by such things as human relations or past selves, and so, your heart is always free. The exact opposite of mine. To be honest, I’m envious.
This was all wrong. Kurusu, Joker was a part of the phantom thieves. The thieves that reform people by stealing their hearts. If only he’d gotten the chance to steal Akechi’s, and grant him the freedom he’s deserved for so long.
Kurusu took another step closer, he was much farther away from the group now.
“Ake— Goro.” Kurusu recklessly spoke his first name instead of code name, he couldn't be bothered to care right now.
Kurusu gritted his teeth before continuing, “You’re speaking nonsense, we can get you out of this! Just come with us. Let’s leave the castle, lets get out of here, we’ll steal Shido’s heart, and then we’ll grant you freedom.” Kurusu began to attempt to bargain with the brunette standing closely in front of him, “All you have to do it come with us, Goro.”
“Hah…if only it were that easy.”
“Goro…”
Akechi sighed, “I’ll never get freedom. Even if I leave with you now there’s no hope for me. So, I intend to die in this palace.”
“No way! Are you crazy? There’s no way we’re going to let you die here.” Kurusu attempted to reason with Akechi.
An almost inaudible, “Is he being for real?” Could be heard leaving Ryuji’s lips in response to what Akechi said.
“If only we met a few years earlier, Joker. It would be possible that we wouldn’t be here in this situation right now.”
The more Akechi spoke the clearer it became. Akechi wasn’t going to back down, his intentions were to die in this place either by the hands of Kurusu or in some other way.
And that would be exactly what happened.
The speech between the two changed along with some of Kurusu’s actions, and one Ryuji line. This demonstrated that Kurusu did have the power to make change in the past, but it was going to be difficult to reason with Akechi.
Just like before. In the exact same way in fact, Akechi died behind the wall.
Kurusu stared at the grey shutters, slamming the fist of his hand against it in anger.
Once again, he had let Akechi down, and the boy was dead behind that wall. Kurusu had done nothing to change what happened.
Returning back to present day with a pang in his heart once more, but he still had time, so, for now, he would continue to attempt to save Akechi.
Even if the others were telling him not to.
“Dude this has to stop.” Ryuji advised. The blonde sat on Kurusu’s couch the night he returned from the latest failed attempt. The two were originally playing video games, but now Ryuji was trying to talk sense into the raven haired boy to his left.
“I agree with Ryuji.” Morgana stated with a defeated sigh, currently he sat behind the two on Kurusu’s bed, “Akira this can’t be good for you.”
Kurusu shrugged his shoulders, the grip he had on the controller loosened.
Ryuji sighed, “I’m taking that as a no.”
Kurusu nodded, his eyes still fixated on the screen, yet his focus was taken away from the game, and that was shown when the words GAME OVER were displayed in red on the screen.
Kurusu set down the controller, “I can’t.”
“Yes you can! Morgana, don't let him go back!” Ryuji shouted as he tried to reason with the two of them.
Morgana didn’t respond, and Kurusu knew he wouldn’t listen to Ryuji. Morgana understood Kurusu’s reasons, and Kurusu was sure Ryuji did too, but he was letting his worries take over.
“I’m glad you’re worried about me, but I have to try, Ryuji.”
“I know…but you’re going to do something stupid.” Ryuji said with a fake laugh, he flicked his friend's forehead in an attempt to playfully lighten the mood.
“You’re right.”
Ryuji smiled wide and fake before asking, “What?”
“A stupid idea crossed my mind, and I’m really starting to consider it.” Kurusu responded.
Ryuji sighed once more, “What is it?” He asked unsettled, clear worry in his voice.
“What if I tried to sacrifice myself instead.”
“Don’t even consider it.” Ryuji stated harshly, he shook his head, and exhaled a long breath as he tried to find his words.
Kurusu couldn’t blame him for reacting that way, it was an outlandish idea to suggest.
“You’re not going back to die instead, and even then how do you know Akechi won’t still die too?” Ryuji asked. He was trying his hardest to make Kurusu understand how terrible this whole situation is
“I know it’s a bad idea.” Kurusu replied, “I won’t do it, don’t dwell on it okay?”
“I’ll try! But it’s hard not to after you say that…”
Kurusu nodded in understanding beforeawkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, then he leaned back on the couch, making himself more comfortable.
“I can make us curry before you return home.” Kurusu offered breaking the short but awkward silence between the two.
Ryuji nodded and he shot Kurusu a smile, “I’d like that.”
The two were now on the first floor of Leblanc, Kurusu cooking in the small kitchen, and Ryuji was sitting in a booth. Ryuji was on his phone, most likely checking something related to the Phantom Thieves website.
The two didn’t bring up Kurusu’s ability as they ate, instead talking about lighter topics.
It wasn’t long until the two soon said their goodbyes to each other once more. Unfortunately Ryuji’s efforts wouldn’t deter Kurusu from attempting once more to save Akechi.
..
Kurusu was quick to leave the warmth of his bed as he awoke the next morning. He texted Ryuji to meet him at Leblanc later in the evening after closing, before he got ready for the day.
Kurusu would attend school, and when he returned home he would ask Morgana to send him back to that day again.
This death had been the worst one yet.
The day played out entirely the same, but this time Kurusu had almost talked Akechi out of fighting him.
Akechi’s hands were balled up into tight fists by his side, and Kurusu was a close distance in front of him. Akechi would only have to take a few steps to completely close the distance.
If he did this Kurusu would hug him before grabbing his hand, and dragging him out of Shido’s palace.
That was never able to happen though…because earlier than the last few times cognitive Akechi approached fhe group. He shouldn’t have been standing to the left behind Akechi…but he was. Cognitive Akechi shouldn’t have been in this room at all.
Kurusu’s throat felt dry, and the words he meant to say went unspoken in his throat.
Even if he tried to , he would've been too slow to warn Akechi.
Cognitive Akechi held up the gun, and he fired the fatal shot just as quickly. Without any words being spoken between them Akechi lay fallen against the cold floor.
Kurusu stood in place as the shock washed over him. The other thieves were just as shocked, but Yusuke didn’t waste a second to grab a hold of Kurusu’s arm as the group began fleeing the scene.
Leaving the hall was a flash of color to Kurusu, he had been so close this time, but he was just as far. Saving Akechi really was going to be one of the toughest challenges he had to face.
Kurusu sat at the table in the safe room, his eyes aimed down and towards the black table. There was nothing interesting about the surface, it was dull, blank, and it made it easy for him to collect his thoughts. Despite the pain Kurusu was experiencing he already knew that when he returned back tomorrow he would try even harder to save Akechi.
..
When Kurusu returned to Leblanc instead of being met with just Ryuji and Morgana he was met with Ann, Ryuji, and Morgana.
Ann, a member of the Phantom Thieves and a part time model, the second person he met coming to Tokyo. The girl with the platinum blonde hair in two pigtails, and those shiny baby-blue eyes.
With the raise of her eyebrows and pursed lips he was sure Ryuji had told her what was going on.
The three were sitting in the booth. Ryuji across from Ann and Morgana. Kurusu, of course, took a seat next to Ann awkwardly. The eyes of the three burned like fire as they stared intensely at him. Each knew what was going on, and each had somewhat of an idea of what happened in Shido’s palace today.
“You didn’t save him did you?” Ryuji asked.
Kurusu shook his head, his eyes fixated on the table in front of him, the surface was as dull and bland as the one in the safe room. It was as if he was recollecting his thoughts all over again, and it made him sick to his stomach.
Ryuji sighed, “I told Ann. You won’t listen when I try to talk sense into you so I went and got some help.” Although, it might be pointless.
“Are you stupid Akira?” Ann started out her speech rather harshly, “You were barely getting by when Akechi first died, and now you’re reliving that day everyday? Do you know how badly this will affect you?” She asked, she sounded astonished as she spoke, it was as if she couldn’t believe the situation even as she said it aloud.
“I know how bad it seems...”
“It seems? It is that bad dude.” Ryuji responded.
“I have to save him.” Kurusu reaffirmed for the umpteenth time, “I know how bad it may seem, but imagine how great it’ll be when I do save him.”
“Why are you trying so hard to save him?” Ann asked. Originally Kurusu was taken aback by the question until Ryuji chimed in.
“Don’t phrase it like that…” Ryuji mumbled before playfully kicking her leg under the table, “…what she’s trying to ask is what even is your relationship with Akechi?”
“Yeah.” Ann asked as well with a nod, she was just as curious as Ryuji was.
Kurusu shrugged, “I don’t really know…?” He himself questioned.
“How do you not know?” Ann asked with wide eyes, she then rolled them, and shook her head, “Just describe it to us then.”
“Well I kind of know, but we weren’t able to talk much and make anything official…because of… you know.”
Ann and Ryuji met eyes once more as the realization set in before turning their attention back to Kurusu.
“There was something there.” He described moving his hands as he said something as to make a picture.
Kurusu turned his eyes away from his friends in embarrassment, “We had kissed a few times, and he was really open around me. With everything surrounding our bond it was practically a relationship. But with the work as the thieves, Akechi’s… death, and getting arrested we couldn’t focus on it.”
“Oh.” Ryuji responded.
“We had all assumed it at one point. Ryuji telling me about you constantly going back to save him practically confirmed it for us.” Ann replied.
Kurusu nodded, “I refuse to lose him…that’s why I want to try everything to bring him back.”
“I’ll help you.” Ann smiled.
Then the four began planning different methods and changes that could be made to prevent Akechi’s death.
Kurusu even fixed some coffee (soda for Ryuji) for them to drink as they discussed this late into the night.
With the help of the three of them coming up with ideas Kurusu felt as if he had a better chance of saving Akechi.
Therefore, when he returned tomorrow he was sure that would be the last time he would have to.
..
Kurusu was working a shift in Leblanc he had just served the detective who sat at the counter across from him.
“Akira, won’t you join me for a game of chess.” Akechi asked after being served his coffee.
Kurusu looked over at Kojiro, and then to Futaba. The café was pretty busy right now, and he understood if he had to work.
Futaba was quick to speak up though, “I can cover for him.”
“Alright.” Kojiro responded, giving a nod to both of them.
When Kurusu turned his attention back to Akechi the detective had a warm smile on his lips, and he had already grabbed the board.
The café was buzzing this evening, it was more populated then it was on most days, yet, Kurusu still felt like he was in his own little world with Akechi. The conversations and other noises were almost inaudible for Kurusu. His senses were completely focused on the brunette sitting in front of him.
Kurusu chose to play the white pieces this time and despite starting first he still lost to Akechi. Kurusu sighed, he was sure he had the detective beat this time.
“You’re getting better, Akira.” Akechi complimented with another one of his fond smiles, “I’m sure at some point in the upcoming future you’ll beat me.”
“Here.”
As Kurusu spoke that one singular word he tossed one of the black chess pieces towards Akechi, “Hold onto it, give it back to me next time we play.”
Akechi stared down at his palm where the piece remained against his gloved hand. The brunette nodded, “Alright.”
Then a guilty feeling began rushing through Kurusu’s veins. It was as if he felt guilt all over him, like it was consuming him from head to toe.
Akechi had no idea what he had been doing.
“Akechi.”
Akechi perked up, “Yes?”
“Can we talk? It’ll be quick.” Kurusu asked, his hands were pointing to the staircase, as if to signal that they needed to speak anywhere other than here.
Akechi nodded, standing up, Kurusu took off his apron, and then the two walked over to the staircase. Kurusu’s legs felt weak as he walked up the staircase. He had no idea how Akechi of all people would react to it.
Ryuji and Ann already weren’t fond of the idea, and said idea revolved around him, so how would Akechi react?
Akechi took a seat on the couch near the dvd played. His posture was perfect, back straight, legs crossed, and hands resting in his lap.
Kurusu hesitantly took a seat next to him, his movements stiff.
“What did you want to discuss, Akira?” Akechi asked, his head turned to the side, facing the nervous Kurusu.
Akechi clearly knew something was off, well, he was a detective after all. It was in his nature to suspect changes in demeanor. Now that they were here there was no way Kurusu could back down.
With his eyes still aimed towards the wooden floor below he confessed, “I can go back to the day you died.”
“What?” Akechi asked, a smile still present on his face, little laughter leaving his lips as he took the entire statement as a joke.
Kurusu diverted his attention towards Akechi, their eyes met for a moment as he said, “I’m serious.” Reaffirming the confession he stated only seconds before.
Kurusu’s eyes were back on the floor, his hands, the walls, anything but Akechi in an instant.
“You…can go back to the day I died. Is that correct?”
“Yes.”
Rather than being upset or angry he was curious, “How did you find out?”
“Morgana told me, he made the entire thing possible. Even right now if I asked, I could return back.” Kurusu explained in little detail.
Akechi nodded, “I see…” His hands formed a triangle in his lap, and he pondered for a short moment, “…I assume this means that you can change the past. Would I be correct?”
Kurusu nodded and he bit his lips harshly as he did so. Despite having this ability he had done nothing to change the past.
“How many times have you gone back?”
Kurusu released his lips from his teeth and he let out a defeated sigh, “Three times.”
“Three?” Akechi repeated, his eyebrows raised, “Wow…I’m rather perplexed. I wish you would’ve told me sooner that you have this power, Akira.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize…just tell me how it’s gone.”
“Horrible.” Kurusu confessed honestly, his elbows were against his knees, and he leaned forehead to rest his head in his hands.
Akechi made a noise of acknowledgement from beside him. Kurusu on the other hand continuously shook his head as all those harsh feelings came rushing back, “I’ve tried so many times yet I still fail to save you.”
Kurusu sat back up, meeting Akechi’s eyes once more, “Even when I change the past you still end up dying in a different way.”
“Akira…”
“I have to continue to try. I must. I will continue to go back to that day until you make it out of Shido’s palace alive.” Kurusu declared once more, he was set on making sure Akechi lived to see another day that wasn’t this false reality.
“…Akira don’t torture yourself with this. I’m content with dying, I’ve already died once, and I’d rather you not trouble yourself with this fantasy that may never happen.” As Akechi spoke he grabbed one of Kurusu’s hands with his gloved one, holding it tightly.
“I’m not!” Kurusu shouted, his volume a much louder level than he expected. He calmed down for a moment, his eyes falling back into his lap, “I struggled so much when you died, and then on Christmas Eve you were back…the thought of losing you again makes my heart ache.”
It felt like you were tearing my heart out of my chest continuously.
“I’m sorry Akira.” Those words had little meaning.
“Don’t apologize…it’s not your fault.” Kurusu murmured, “That’s why I want to keep trying…I want to save you no matter what.”
Akechi laughed once more, lightheartedly for such a serious situation, “Alright, hero.” He smiled.
Akechi tore his hand away from Kurusu’s own for a moment, and he removed one of his gloves. He held the black glove towards Kurusu, “Hold onto this and return it when you’ve saved me, Akira.”
This event mirrored the one that took place downstairs not too long ago.
“Here.”
As Kurusu spoke that one singular word he tossed one of the black chess pieces towards Akechi, “Hold onto it, give it back to me next time we play.”
Akechi stared down at his palm where the piece remained against his gloved hand. The brunette nodded, “Alright.”
“I’ll be returning it soon.” Kurusu commented cockily with a smile.
Their eyes met again, “I hope so.” Akechi replied, his voice low, the close proximity between them being noticed by the two.
This action continued, their eyes never leaving each other's gaze, the tension grew between them, and Kurusu knew Akechi was feeling it as well. It felt heavy, nerve-wracking, but if Kurusu moved forward this weight would be lifted off him in an instant.
However, Akechi always refused to lose, and he, of course, had to make the first move.
Akechi tilted his head to the side slightly, moving closer until his breath was ghosting against Kurusu’s lips.
“Hey, can I?”
Kurusu nodded, “Mhm.” At the same time he was already grabbing Akechi’s hand, and placing it on his face.
The gap was closed, and Akechi’s lips felt so soft against his own. It wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling, they had done this before, but at the same time it felt nostalgic. It’d been so long since they’d done this for a mix of reasons.
Kurusu let his fingers tangle in Akechi’s hair; it was as soft as it looked. Their lips moved slowly against each other. It was as if they were trying to savor the moment like it would never happen again. Maybe there was a reason for this, something they knew, but for now Kurusu’s mind was only focused on Akechi and his lips that were placed against his own.
Then Akechi was waving goodbye as they stood outside of Leblanc.
Kurusu would return to the palace on the day Akechi died once more tomorrow.
..
If Kurusu were to describe the events leading up to meeting Akechi in Shido’s palace. He could probably do it word for word by now while also going into immense detail. Kurusu has been here plenty of times by now, and he’s replayed this day too many times.
Kurusu was standing in Shido’s palace once more. They were walking towards the hall, and Kurusu could only feel his heart fall into his stomach. His entire body felt pained, and his throat was scratchy. He was holding back his words along with tears he refused to cry in front of them.
Akechi jumped down making his presence known once more. Just like he did every other time Kurusu was here.
And everything was perfect…
Telling Akechi must’ve triggered a change because now the Akechi here was listening to Kurusu’s words, and he was trusting him. It felt like a dream.
And it was.
The group had to escape to a safe room before cognitive Akechi arrived. Kurusu couldn’t trust him not to kill Akechi. Kurusu could easily shoot him, but what if he froze up again, or shot him at the same time he shot Akechi. It was all too big of a risk.
That’s why they halted their movements at the hall, and instead turned around and began their sprint back to the nearest safe room.
Kurusu was sure they would make it, and he was convinced that this time he would save Akechi.
That never happened.
When Akechi was crowded alone by a group of shadows Kurusu attempted to run over and save him. It was definitely not a fight either could take alone, or even as a duo but they had to try.
Ryuji wouldn’t let it happen, he grabbed both of Kurusu’s wrists, gripping them tightly as he dragged the boy away from Akechi and towards the safe room. All of this happened amidst Kurusu’s protests and the other thieves' screams. They were split up, some already entered the safe room, others trying to avoid the shadows before it got bad, and Ryuji refused to let Kurusu attempt to risk his life.
Kurusu sat in the safe room with the other thieves waiting for Akechi to walk through the door and say by some miracle he won.
He never did.
Akechi died once more when he was so close to saving him.
Kurusu was right there. If he had just stepped in there was a chance that he could’ve saved Akechi.
Or maybe…Ryuji saved him instead.
There was nothing he could do now. Kurusu returned to the present, and he went to sleep knowing he failed to rescue Akechi for the fourth time.
There was still time.
Kurusu would be able to return tomorrow the day after that as well and a few more times after that. However, he wouldn’t need all that time, Kurusu would save him before the deadline.
The next day, however, he never returned to the day Akechi died. Instead, the detective invited him out to play a game of billiards to take his mind off of the depressing task. There was no chance of taking Kurusu out of it, especially when he was dead set on completing it.
In the meantime, Akechi could free Kurusu’s heart from the endless struggles he faced as he failed over and over again.
Akechi was always better at billiards; he had even beat Kurusu with his non-dominant hand. Kurusu could only admire how skilled Akechi was at practically everything he did. From his charm to smarts to ability to adapt to tough situations while being the Prince Detective all as a high-school student.
Even now Akechi was about to win right off the break. Kurusu could only laugh as the other showed no remorse, not that Kurusu would want him too. This was why Kurusu loved him so much as a rival, he was a worthy opponent in every aspect.
They’d play over and over again yet Kurusu would only come close, he’d manage to lose over and over again. One could say it was similar to how the last few days have gone in Shido’s palace.
Afterwards, Akechi took him to a place where only they went. Kurusu was the first and still the only person Akechi has taken to the Jazz Jin. It was a place that Kurusu associated with Akechi. When he went to the Jazz Jin he thought of Akechi, and when someone mentioned the Jazz Jin his mind thought of Akechi once more.
The two took a seat next to one another, Kurusu leaned back getting comfortable in his seat as Akechi ordered them drinks. Kurusu asked him to surprise him, he trusted Akechi’s choice in drinks as he did most things.
When Akechi returned the show was about to begin. The music here was always enjoyable, it was a place to unwind and relax, Akechi could get a break from his detective work, and right now Kurusu didn’t focus on the stress provided from the task at hand. A woman in a shining expensive dress walked up to the mic, instruments began to play not too far from her, and she sang. The Jazz Jin had the same routine, just like Shido’s palace, but here Kurusu wasn’t consumed with stress instead he was content.
Kurusu ignored the fact that his phone was vibrating in his pocket, he could always answer the messages later. With Akechi though, it was as if he were walking on a tightrope, one day he would eventually fall, and the two would no longer be here together, and right now the rope is wobbling uncontrollably. Kurusu was always on the verge of falling.
When the performance came to an end the two were able to engage in their own conversation.
Kurusu knew where the conversation was going with the unusual expression on Akechi’s face.
Akechi pursed his lips, and then he began to address the elephant in the room, “So…”
“I failed again.”
“I see…” Akechi responded with an understanding nod, “…don’t feel inclined to save me just because you can go back.”
“I’ll save you because I want to, Goro.” Kurusu shot down his weak argument.
Akechi nodded and he let out a gentle laugh, “I’ll never understand you.”
Kurusu didn’t respond, by now, he knew what Akechi meant by that statement.
“I must be going soon.” Akechi said after a short silence, “We must meet again soon, Akira.”
Kurusu smiled then he scoffed, “Of course, you still owe me a game of chess.”
“I do and I’ll beat you again.”
“We’ll see.” Kurusu said with a daring grin.
Once again the two were saying their goodbyes, and Kurusu was finally checking his phone. He had plenty of missed messages from the Phantom Thieves group chat, and individual ones from the members.
They were waiting at Leblanc, and Kurusu had a pretty good idea why this was.
..
As he walked through the door he was immediately bombarded with questions and stares.
Ryuji and Ann must’ve told the others, and in all honesty Kurusu could not blame them. He understood why they’d do this, but he didn’t expect it to happen so soon.
Kurusu let out a defeated sigh before he grabbed a chair from the counter, and he dragged it over to the booth they were sitting at. Kojiro wasn’t here, he must’ve told them to wait for him, and to also not wreck the place.
Each had drinks so this must’ve been the case.
All of the Phantom Thieves were sitting here now ready to discuss Kurusu’s latest secret mission. Haru with the pink haired curls, student council president Makoto with the brown hair, bob cut, and a headband on her head. Along with those two were the other two missing thieves Madarame's formal pupil, the artist, Kitagawa Yusuke, and the ginger, the café owner Sakura Kojiro’s daughter, and the girl who was practically Kurusu’s sister by now, Sakura Futaba.
“So you can go back in time, Akira?” Haru asked with wide eyes, she held her coffee cup with both hands, and she took a sip quickly, her questioning eyes never leaving Kurusu.
All of Kurusu’s suspicions were confirmed and correct .
Kurusu nodded, “Yeah…to the day Akechi died.”
“So you’ve been returning back in an attempt to save him?” Yusuke asked. The other members were filling in the blanks on what they missed.
“Does Akechi know?” Futaba chimed in with her own question, before answering it herself, “Oh! Is that what you discussed with him a few days ago?”
Kurusu nodded whilst his eyes were darting between the two. Ryuji and Ann did a great job filling them in.
“How did the most recent attempt go?” Makoto asked.
Kurusu shook his head, “I was close but I failed.”
“Tell us what happened dude.” Ryuji inquired, “Maybe then he can give you more ideas on what to do next time.”
Ryuji was right, so that was exactly what Kurusu did.
“Alright.” Kurusu agreed, he cleared his throat before he began his long explanation for the others, “Everything in Shido’s palace was the same up to when we met Akechi. I told Akechi before traveling back in time again, and this time I was able to convince him to run away. Instead of fighting we intended to go to a safe room, but on the way there he was attacked by a large group of strong shadows. I wasn’t able to fight with him because Ryuji dragged me away.”
“So I ended up saving you instead?” Ryuji asked.
Kurusu nodded, “That's what it seems.”
“Damnit.” Ann sighed in frustration, she was just as frustrated as Kurusu about this whole situation, “Even when you avoid the fight, and convince him to run he still dies. Cognitive Akechi didn’t even make a presence this time…just what do you do?”
Yusuke had his fingers holding his chin, his arms were crossed, and he was leaning back, staring intently at nothing at all. He had a rather upset expression, one of sorrow as he tried to empathize with Kurusu’s emotions.
“Akira…have you considered that there is no reality where Akechi lives?” Yusuke asked, it wasn’t a joke either, he was completely serious. Yusuke was bringing forth the possibility that there was no happy ending.
Of course Kurusu had thought of it, how could he not?
Kurusu’s eyes wandered to Morgana, the black cat sitting on the chair next to him. Kurusu had thought of the possibility, but he still chose to be in denial about it.
“When I proposed the idea I said you could go back in time, and try to fix everything. Not that it was guaranteed to work.” Morgana explained further.
And just like that Kurusu’s fears were confirmed. There was a chance, a likely possibility that there was no reality where Akechi lives.
Additionally when Kurusu is being timed like this he may never find the reality where Akechi does live if it exists in the first place.
Every passing day his odds of Akechi seemed to dwindle more and more, but that wouldn’t be enough to stop him. Especially when he promised to return Akechi’s glove to him once he saved him.
“Don’t—think like that…Akira!” Ann spoke awkwardly, hesitating as she tried to lighten the mood.
“Yeah!” Ryuji shouted quickly in agreement.
“Let’s move on…I’m curious what Akechi thinks of all this.” Makoto asked, “From what you’ve told us he does know.”
Kurusu nodded, “I told him I’d save him, and he tried to get me to back down. He realized it was futile soon after so he gave me his glove.” Kurusu explained simply, “I’ll return it to him once I save him.”
“I’m shocked he’d back down with how competitive he is.” Ryuji grumbled.
“Well…when Akira is trying to save his life I’m sure he doesn’t want to entirely stop it.” Ann said.
The conversations dragged out long into the late evening. The topics changed away from the grim saving of Akechi to lighter ones like school and exams.
Moments like this allowed Kurusu to escape from the reality that was slowly beginning to set in.
Yusuke’s words and Morgana’s response were still ringing loudly in his ears.
“Akira…have you considered that there is no reality where Akechi lives?” Yusuke asked, it wasn’t a joke either, he was completely serious. Yusuke was bringing forth the possibility that there was no happy ending.
“When I proposed the idea I said you could go back in time, and try to fix everything. Not that it was guaranteed to work.” Morgana explained further.
They played over and over again like a broken record, and Kurusu couldn’t forget them.
But Kurusu couldn’t give up yet.
..
Kurusu tried on and on again getting the same endings, or seeing Akechi die in a new terrible way.
Yet, not once has he been able to save him, nor has he come close. Each time he’s either dead, or on the verge of death with no chance of survival.
Kurusu has had to witness the death of his love over and over again each day.
Despite that he refused to give up. He’s heard the denial of Akechi having a reality where he lives, but Kurusu would try again and again until he was out of time. In his eyes there was at least one reality where he lives, and Kurusu would find out how to make that one true.
On this day Kurusu was standing outside of Shido’s palace once more, and he was as determined as he always was.
If there was a way to be more determined than the last day then it would be bewildered. Kurusu has put all of his recent effort into trying any and everything to find a way to allow Akechi to live. Any loophole or option, Kurusu would try.
Kurusu could ignore the fact that he was deteriorating. Outside of Shido’s palace he was filled with despair. For now, Kurusu could ignore the effects watching Akechi die over and over again had on him because his goal shined bright enough to erase all that pain. Akechi living.
A life without Akechi was just as dark and grim as it is now, and if he ever wanted to welcome a light brighter than the sun back in he’d have to save Akechi.
That’s why day in and day out Kurusu has attempted over and over again to replay this day, and succeed, save Akechi once and for all.
Kurusu would make sure that happened today.
Kurusu didn’t face Akechi until he revealed himself in the hall. That gave Kurusu little time to convince Akechi to leave, and to leave at all. This is a reason this task has been so challenging.
Kurusu walked faster than the other members of the group as they approached the hall. Kurusu needed to talk to Akechi, and instead of fighting they’d leave as soon as possible. Kurusu would keep Akechi glued to his side so there was no chance he could get hurt this time.
Kurusu has convinced Akechi to leave, to run away plenty of times so why would this day be any different…
Why?
Kurusu had no idea.
But for some reason Akechi wasn’t backing down, and Kurusu had no choice but to fight.
Today should’ve gone nothing like this. It was as if Kurusu was replaying the original way he died over again. Kurusu hadn’t changed anything this time.
The hope he had in his heart was beginning to fase as he continued to fight Akechi. The noises around him blurring as he was caught up with the wave of emotions coursing through him.
It should’ve never gone like this…
One of his final attempts is currently going to waste with an utterly similar replay of Akechi’s death. Kurusu had done nothing at all. There was no way to change what was about to happen.
Until there was.
After the fight the two exchanged words in a conversation. Words that Kurusu wished to never hear again. It hurt just as much as the first time Akechi said it.
Each word stabbing him like a knife piercing his heart the action reopening a wound that was not yet healed.
“Under different circumstances we could’ve been great rivals or perhaps even friends.”
“And so, your heart is always free. The exact opposite of mine. To be honest I’m envious.”
“If only we met a few years earlier.”
Then Cognitive Akechi stepped out holding a gun to Akechi’s head, and Kurusu knew exactly what was going to happen next.
Until Kurusu successfully ? made a change.
“Take me instead.” Kurusu immediately offered, hos voice quivered as he spoke, but he tried his best to keep composure.
Kurusu got down on his knees, dropping his gun, and tossing it towards Cognitive Akechi’s feet.
Cognitive Akechi grinned, pressing a finger playfully to his cheek, the gun still pointed at Akechi, “Oh?”
“Kill me.” Kurusu demanded, he glared at the Cognitive Akechi through his hair that fell messily on his face.
The thieves stared at the scene in shock. Kurusu was only able to make out a few of the statements that were said by then amongst the chaos.
“What are you doing?” Ann shouted, she was completely shocked, distraught by what her eyes were capturing.
“Akira?! Don’t be an idiot, get up!” Ryuji yelled.
“What do we do?”
Akechi’s eyes fell fondly upon Kurusu and he shook his head.
Kurusu let his eyes leave the Cognitive Akechi and he made eyes with the real one. The Akechi that he’d fallen in love with.
With a smile on his face Akechi spoke, and he sounded so similar to the Akechi that Kurusu’s been seeing recently.
Similar enough that it made Kurusu question if Akechi could also go back in time. It wouldn’t be the first time Akechi could do something otherworldly like Kurusu.
Akechi’s eyes lightened up as he stared at Kurusu, “You can’t die, Akira…” Akechi murmured, “…who is going to mourn me when I die.”
Akechi knew what the outcome would be, and so did Kurusu who wanted to deny it. Even if Kurusu sacrificed himself, Akechi would be shot right after.
Kurusu went to retaliate, but he couldn’t. A gunshot rang out in the hall, and Akechi was shot by his cognitive self in front of the Thieves.
Kurusu’s mouth was left open, agape, the ringing from the gunshot was still playing in his ears. His eyes were as wide as his mouth as he stared at the fallen Akechi only a few feet in front of him. Kurusu couldn’t move, even his mind was frozen, watching Akechi die in front of him like this completely rewired him. Kurusu was at a loss.
And even now he was fully prepared to feel the wrath of Cognitive Akechi.
Yusuke and Ryuji refused to let this happen, they ran over to the fallen boy, lifting him up, each of his arms falling over one of their shoulders. Kurusu’s legs barely worked, he was still trying to fathom what had just occurred.
From the expressions of the other Phantom Thieves Kurusu could tell they were flabbergasted, but Kurusu was on a completely different level.
It had all happened in what felt like seconds. Akechi was shot and killed, and then suddenly Ryuji and Yusuke were dragging him into a safe-room. It was a blur of his senses, nothing felt real, sounds were hard to makeout and his vision was commonly blurry.
Even when Kurusu attempted to sacrifice himself it still wasn’t enough to save Akechi.
Then he broke.
That final event was all it took for Kurusu to realize no matter how many times he tried there was no way Akechi could be saved.
Then again, there was one possibility.
Today was February first.
Tomorrow he will be deciding on whether or not to go through with Maruki's plans.
To simplify, Kurusu was out of time.
If he went through with Maruki’s plan. If Kurusu embraced Maruki’s reality then Akechi would live. Kurusu’s one and only wish would be granted, but the Akechi in that reality… he would never be the real Akechi Goro.
Not to mention, there was no way Akechi would be happy with Kurusu going through with that.
That was when he dawned on him, all at once, or maybe…maybe he’s known all along that this would happen. There was no way to save Akechi. No matter how hard Kurusu would try, the boy would never be saved.
In the end, despite all his efforts, he would have to say goodbye one last time.
Kurusu has traveled back to that day in Shido’s palace countless times, yet, everytime, Akechi either sacrificed himself or dies in another way. Kurusu has even tried to sacrifice himself… and that wasn’t enough to save him.
Even then, Kurusu refused to forget their promise. Kurusu hoped one day they would be able to duel like he promised Akechi they would.
As of now, however, that was just a wish.
“Akira.”
The bells jingled as the door opened, alerting Kurusu of a new customers. This customers wasn’t very “new” though.
There was only one person that sweet voice belonged to, the brunette, The Prince Detective, Akechi Goro.
Kurusu turned his head away from the coffee he was brewing, and he looked solemnly at Akechi.
Akechi could sense the shift in air between them, of course he could, he was the best detective Kurusu had ever seen.
“I don’t blame you.” Akechi spoke in response to nothing at all. He must’ve guessed what was about to happen from the expression on Kurusu’s face. Yet, despite knowing, Akechi didn’t seem upset. The detective even shot Kurusu one of his warm smiles.
How could he smile when he knew he would be gone tomorrow?
Kurusu has replayed this day everyday for the last few weeks, and everytime he had to watch Akechi die. Each time in a different way some deaths were more brutal than others. Kurusu could only hope that this death was peaceful because above all else he wanted Akechi to be happy in his final moments.
Akechi was now sitting on one of the chairs in front of the counter. Kurusu stood in front of him, the coffee he was brewing began to overflow as he got lost in thought. However, he was quick to begin cleaning the mess.
Kurusu gave Akechi the glass even though he knew his coffee was lacking, and far from his best, Akechi deserved better on his final day.
“Speak to me, Akira. I for one am not upset with you in fact, I’d even go as far to say I’m relieved.” Akechi spoke once more.
Kurusu nodded and instead of addressing the main issue on hand he diverted his attention to something miniscule, “Your blazer…it has a coffee stain on it.” Kurusu commented.
Kurusu has seen the almost invisible stain several times in the past, and only on this day did he point out the miniscule stain on his grey suit-jacket. It didn’t matter how many minor changes he made because in the end nothing would be enough to save Akechi.
Akechi let out a breathy laugh at the statement he had chose, “I see…” he responded his eyes peering down at his blazer to observe the stain, before pointlessly wiping away at it with a napkin, “…come take a seat next to me.”
Kurusu nodded but before he did that he walked over to the enterance of the café, he flipped the sign from open to closed, and then he took a seat next to Akechi.
Each had a cup of coffee in front of them, Kurusu’s eyes aimed directly at the liquid instead of the man to his right.
“Akira…” Akechi dragged out the speech of his first name again.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s rather foolish to be. This is our destined reality, Akira, and I think it’s better for both of us to embrace that.” Akechi spoke lightheartedly of the weighted matter. It wasn’t as simple as just “embracing” it.
I’m going to lose you.
“The world is pretty cruel.” Kurusu murmured, “I’ve watched you die over and over again, and in the end I still can’t save you.”
Akechi’s eyes drifted down to the countertop, mirroring what Kurusu had been doing. Both their expressions were cold, empty, on a day like this it was like there was no sun to bring light to their faces.
Akechi turned his body towards Kurusu, he reached his hands out to the other boy, cupping his face gently as he did so.
Their eyes met for one of the first times tonight.
Kurusu’s were glossy, tears welling up quickly like a sink about to overflow. Akechi could only assume his own looked similar.
Akechi’s words came out strained, “Why? Why would you put yourself through that?”
“…because I love you, isn’t that obvious?”
Akechi pulled Kurusu into a tight embrace, one that neither stood of a chance of escaping from. This was the final hug Akechi would be able to give Kurusu so he had to make it the best one.
“God, love really does make people do stupid things , " Akechi mumbled into Kurusu’s shoulder amidst small laughter, “… you fool…”
The two pulled back from the hug, their foreheads pressed gently against one anothers, “I may be a fool but you still love me Goro.” Kurusu retorted with a visible smile on his lips.
“Unfortunately.” Akechi sighed jokingly.
Kurusu laughed and then he was serious once more, “I love you too, Akira.”
“I'm going to miss you a lot.”
“Don’t start missing me already, I'm still here.” Akechi murmured, his voice was low, almost a whisper, loud enough for only Kurusu to hear.
Kurusu attempted to nod against Akechi’s forehead “Alright.” He agreed.
Then Akechi pushed forward, eliminating the almost nonexistent gap. The kiss was gentle but filled with too many emotions, it was almost suffocating, the simple, familiar action making Kurusu dizzy.
This would be the last time he was able to touch Akechi, hold him, kiss him, speak to him. The kisses he gave were always so sweet, they’d fill Kurusu with warmth, but this one couldn’t feed the emptiness pooling in his heart.
Kurusu pulled away and he loosely wrapped his arms back around Akechi. He couldn’t let go of Akechi, it was as if he worried letting go would mean losing him right now, forever.
“Akira,” The mention of his name once more drew him back to reality, “…join me in one last game of chess.”
Akechi pulled the chess piece Kurusu had given him out of his pocket.
“Of course.” Kurusu responded with a smile, now all that was left was for Kurusu to return Akechi’s glove. Although the chances of this happening now seemed slim.
Kurusu wasn’t surprised when Akechi won, he had always once, even now he was just as skilled as always. Kurusu wished to one day beat him, and maybe it would be possible. Whether that was in this life or another.
All good things eventually had to come to an end.
The two stood up, standing next to the chairs they had just been sitting in by the counter. There was one last engulfing hug exchanging between the two.
Then Akechi muttered the words Kurusu never wanted to hear, “Let's go back to our true reality”
Kurusu was hesitant at first, but he nodded, this was the only option he had.
As Akechi left the establishment Kurusu turned to his right, and he grabbed the exact same chess piece he gave Akechi. He gripped the piece tightly in the palm of his hand before placing it in his pocket.
Does this mean they’ll never meet again outside of this fake reality?
..
The attempt that broke Kurusu . This all seemed way too similar to the attempt that broke Kurusu. Once more Kurusu failed to convince Akechi to run away wit him.
It was like if Akechi in the current time lost faith then the Akechi in the past did as well. Well, this could also merely be a coincidence.
Kurusu had to fight the boy once more, and he had to listen to Akechi speak those words that continuously reopened the wound in his heart.
Then Kurusu didn’t attempt to sacrifice himself, and the situation continued to play out just like it did the day Akechi originally died.
Cognitive Akechi aimed a gun at Akechi’s head while Akechi aimed a gun at Kurusu. Then Akechi swiftly aimed the gun at Cognitive Akechi, shooting him once before aiming towards the red button that would close the door.
Akechi shot the button. The shutters were slowly beginning to close, and Kurusu made a run towards him. He was either going to pull him to the other side, or he was going to die here with Akechi.
Another gunshot rang out in the hall soon after, but Kurusu couldn’t focus on that as he and Akechi made it across the wall as the door shut quickly. Kurusu was panting, stressed, nervous, and out of breath.
It was a miracle. He’d done it. This time he prevented Akechi’s death.
Until he looked down at the weak boy laying his head in his lap.
Akechi had been shot .
“I’ll get you out of here, and we’ll get you medical attention, Goro, you’ll live.” Kurusu cried out, “For once, I’ll be able to save you.”
“Akira…”
“Goro, you’re going to live I promise!” Kurusu explained once more, he spoke quickly as he panicked.
The other thieves were just as alarmed as Kurusu. Some meeting eyes as they evaluated the situation.
Chaos erupted in the hall from panicked yells, and solutions to what to do whilst Akechi was bleeding out in Kurusu’s arms.
Kurusu’s legs were weak, there was no way he was going to be able to carry Akechi out of here, but that was fine he would find a way.
“Don’t worry Goro, I'll return your glove to you soon. Don’t worry.” Kurusu repeated over and over again. It was as if he was trying to reassure himself more than Akechi.
Akechi was getting weaker and weaker the longer he laid in Kurusu’s arms.
“…Akira…Akira…Akira… ”
Akechi repeated a string of his name as he tried to grab the attention of the boy above him. His arms were shaking nonstop, and he could barely hold himself up as he tried to steady himself on Kurusu’s shoulder and the floor.
Then he accepted he wouldn’t stand, move, Akechi accepted something that he knew was coming.
Akechi frowned, “I won’t be leaving here Akira.” His voice came out in a rasp as he struggled to speak.
“What are you talking about? I’m going to save you.”
Akechi shook his head once more, coughing before he explained, “The wound is too bad..”
Kurusu’s eyes were wide, and his face went through a range of emotions as he was unable to settle on one. This was the closest he has ever been to saving Akechi, and now he was supposed to let him die?
“Kill me…” Akechi mumbled weakly as he laid on Kurusu’s knees, his back resting against his arm, “…please.” He pleaded.
“No!” Kurusu shouted, “I refuse!”
Akechi looked up at Kurusu, his gloved hand reaching out towards Kurusu’s face, cupping it gently. Akechi wiped the falling tears on his cheek, Kurusu hadn’t realized he had been crying.
Akechi smiled, a weak, pathetic smile, but also at the same time it was a warm, fond smile.
He met Kurusu’s eyes with his own before restating what he said before, “ Please kill me, Akira …I would much rather die by your hands than the ones of my cognitive self. I’d even say it’d be an honor.”
“I refuse! Goro! This is the one chance I have to save you!”
Kurusu repeated a string of, “No way…no way…no way…” as Akechi’s ridiculous request replayed in his head.
Although he had said tonight would be the last night, when an opportunity like this reveals itself then he must at least attempt to save the love of his life.
“Akira.”
Akechi spoke his name once more. Kurusu’s eyes were wide, nothing like the calm expression Akechi was displaying.
“Goro.”
“By the time we get out of here, and get to a hospital…” Akechi paused as he weakly choked, “…I’d already have passed.”
“No…” Kurusu tried to deny the truth, “…no way…you can’t die Goro.”
Kurusu’s breath hitched as he watched the other, Akechi continued to affection stroke his cheek and wipe the ever falling tears. Akechi still managed to look calm despite what was currently happening.
“Akira, please, grant me my wish, and end my suffering.” Akechi reached out, and grabbed the knife he carried covered in his pocket, “Pierce my chest for the final time, move on, and free your heart from the continuous agony. You’ll never save me Akira, I admire you dearly for trying, but I am bound to die here no matter how hard you try.”
Kurusu bit his lips, he tried to silence his cries, but as Akechi spoke another wave of tears began to fall down his cheeks.
It was intense the sounds of muffled cries, and screams that were almost silent to Kurusu amongst the chaos.
Kurusu knew every word that was spoken was true, and he reached out to take the knife from Akechi. His hand shook, his body wobbled as he grabbed the weapon.
Kurusu held it for a moment, swallowing harshly, his vision was blurred from the endless tears, his heart was beating loudly and painfully.
“I love you, Goro.”
And once he finished that sentence he pierced the chest of his lover in hopes to finally end their constant suffering. His hands flew to Akechi’s face, cupping it, pulling him close, and into a kiss, the final kiss he’d be able to give him.
As Kurusu pulled back he was met with Akechi’s relaxed face, he could see the life leaving the other boy.
“I…love you too…” Akechi weakly mumbled his last words with a small, tender smile on his face, “…Akira.”
Then there was a loud ringing in his ears, he wasn’t able to make out any words if any were being spoken. There were only screams and rings.
As Akechi laid in his arms Kurusu could only hug the boy tightly, the life leaving his body as Kurusu cried into his shoulder.
Akechi was gone.
Kurusu could only hope that he didn’t suffer too much in his final moments.
..
That night he returned back to Leblanc. The light in his eyes had disappeared, but shockingly Akechi sat there waiting for him once more. It was around fifteen minutes to closing, but Kurusu was sure he would stay afterwards too.
Kurusu hadn’t expected Akechi to be back here. In all honesty he thought the meeting the two had earlier was their final moments together.
Kurusu was relieved that he’d be able to spend a little longer with Akechi before he’d disappear.
A small adoring smile fell on Kurusu’s lips for a moment, but then a flash of memories played in his mind. The memories that displayed what just took place in Shido’s palace. It was nothing to smile about.
Kurusu stared down at Akechi’s hands, one glove still missing. Kurusu would never be able to return it because he failed to reach the only goal he had.
Kurusu swallowed his emotions before he stepped towards Akechi, “Hey.” He greeted the brunette, although he couldn’t look him in the eyes especially after what happened.
“Hello, Akira.” Akechi returned his greeting, “I take that what happened was bad, correct?”
Kurusu could only nod and walk towards Akechi. He was scared to hug him, the familiar feeling of Akechi’s cold lifeless body in his arms hadn’t left him yet.
“This is the last time we’ll see each other…”
Kurusu’s words came out in a soft choked whisper, the tears he held back threatening to fall, “Unfortunately…”
“Don’t be sad.” Akechi uselessly spoke, he knew a statement like that had no meaning right now.
Akechi turned his eyes down towards the floor for a moment, and then back up to Kurusu, “Let me spend the night here…for the last time.”
Kurusu would never refuse that.
The two walked up the stairs to Kurusu’s room in the attic. Futaba had Morgana tonight, and now Kurusu was slightly happier that Akechi was here. He wouldn’t be lonely as he let his emotions free.
Akechi took off his shoes, he changed into a pair of Kurusu’s clothing, he’d done this before, and most of the clothes fit considering that they're fairly similar in height. Akechi laid down on the bed, and was immediately engulfed into a hug by Kurusu.
The two would lay like that throughout the night as they slept. Kurusu felt the strange warmth from Akechi’s body once last time. Kurusu would say that “It felt nice to hold an Akechi that wasn’t cold to the touch.”
If only they were two other people living two other lives…it was possible that then they would be happy.
..
The next morning Kurusu woke up all alone.
..
On February third it snowed. From children's laughter outside as they built snowmen, to the conversations between men shoveling the streets, yet Kurusu still felt as empty as ever.
That day Akechi never showed up to the coffee shop, and February second was the last day he ever did.
However, that night Kurusu sat at the counter playing chess against a friend of his. One who he could no longer touch, speak to, or even see, but even then chess was as enjoyable as always.
When he finished the game he placed one of the black pawns in his pocket, the one he had thrown to Akechi when they had played chess together a few months ago.
This time Kurusu would hold onto it until they played again.
Still, Kurusu had hope that one day Akechi would walk through those doors. He’d greet Kurusu with a warm hug, an embrace that for a moment would make Kurusu forget what he’d gone through along with the cold outside.
He could only hope .
He even still hoped to fulfill their promise one day.
That may have been possible…
If only they had met a few years earlier.