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“I don’t need another nurse.”
“You’re so stubborn, ge! How do you think you’ll manage with a broken leg?”
Zishu sat in the wheelchair with his arms crossed. There was nothing he hated more than being vulnerable. But with a broken femur that would take at least a month and a half to heal, he didn’t really have much of a choice.
“I can make it to the bathroom on my own.”
“And the kitchen? Or even your bed? Ge, I wouldn’t have to hire you a nurse if you would just move in with me and Jing An.”
Qin Jiuxiao, Zhou Zishu’s adopted little brother, wheeled him through his apartment after a doctor’s appointment.
“I like my space. Which is why I don’t want a nurse in here.”
“You’ve already scared away two nurses. But don’t worry. Jing An told me that this one will be your match.”
Qin Jiuxiao helps Zhou Zishu into the recliner in his living room, gently patting the cast on his right leg.
"I'm telling you, I'm fine! Since you're here, hand me my laptop."
Zhou Zishu knew that he was being too proud for his own good. After all, he knew that climbing a new hiking trail alone would be dangerous. But he had done it anyways, resulting in a broken femur and a destroyed very expensive camera.
He made a name for himself as a sort of nature expert. He had a blog full of his favorite hiking trails, garden updates, and profiles of all kinds of flora. Zhou Zishu gained a decent following from his blog alone and decided to turn it into his full-time career. His first book on medicinal flowers and herbs, titled Four Seasons, had been a big hit. In it, he detailed growing, foraging, and using things from the earth in order to supplement a healthy life. He had been working on his second book when the accident befell him and Zhou Zishu had lost all motivation. Thankfully his publisher and friend Han Ying allowed him to extend his writing time indefinitely.
Qin Jiuxiao handed him his laptop, his only way to the outside world.
“Jing An will be by later with food, be nice to her. She’ll bring the nurse with her then.”
“I’m always nicer to your better half.”
“Haha, very funny ge. Just think healing thoughts! You’ll be out of that cast in no time!”
Zhou Zishu listened for his brother to leave before opening up his laptop. Having already been in the cast for two weeks, he had gotten used to mindlessly scrolling on the internet to pass the time. It was through all that scrolling that he found his newest guilty pleasure.
A youtube creator by the name Wen Kexing. Zhou Zishu had been interested in the thumbnail of a handsome man holding a tray of mooncakes. He started watching the videos and had been hooked ever since, even though he’d die before he told anyone. He used a burner account to subscribe and become a channel member just so he could get even more content from the man he’d become enamored with.
If he reminded him of his first love and Zhou Zishu filled his own head with fantasies, so what?
It had been twenty years since Zhou Zishu had seen Zhen Yan. They had grown up together and spent so much time together. Zhen Yan had been the first person to accept Zhou Zishu for who he was.
“Listen, Yan’er, I don’t want to be called jiejie anymore.”
Zhen Yan was hanging off of Zhou Zishu’s arms like they always did. Both teens were walking to the convenience store, where thirteen-year-old Zhen Yan would fill up a basket with snacks and sweets and fifteen-year-old Zhou Zishu would pay for it all. Afterward, they would sit in the park by the river. Zhen Yan would eat and feed Zhou Zishu as they watched the ducks swim by and talk about everything.
“Hm? Why? You don’t like it?”
Zhen Yan had their hair in a carefully done bun high on their head. They wore a shirt and frilly shorts, their normal summer outfit. Zhou Zishu was wearing shorts but kept wearing a hoodie despite the hot weather. Since their body had started developing, Zhou Zishu was uncomfortable with tight-fitting clothes and would rather not show off.
“It just…doesn’t feel right to me, okay?”
“Okay… then what should I can you?”
Zhou Zishu shrugged, and Zhen Yan thought about it more as they walked.
“What about gege?”
Warmth spread through Zhou Zishu’s chest at the sound. They had heard it before, sure, but never directed at themself.
“Mn. I like that.”
Zhen Yan giggled, twirling around while pulling Zhou Zishu to the convenience store.
“Gege, buy me lots of delicious things!”
That had been the first time that someone had called Zhou Zishu that. It was something so small, but it helped him realize the man that he was. He loved Zhen Yan for accepting him for who he was without batting an eye. He wished that they had been able to stay in contact and he missed them dearly.
Maybe that's why he had become so attached to Wen Kexing after only watching one video of his. Instead of continuing to think about the past, Zhou Zishu clicked on the latest video from Wen Kexing. Like in all his videos, this one started in a garden. Wen Kexing was reclining in a lounge chair, wearing a cream-colored linen outfit, flowy pants, and a shirt that was cropped just enough to show a thin line of skin. He fanned himself with an ornated folding fan and smiled at the camera like an old friend.
"Hello, faithful viewers. Welcome back to the garden." Wen Kexing's voice was soft and sophisticated like he was about to read poetry to the video watchers. Zhou Zishu turned up the volume so he could hear every word.
“Summer is in full swing now, and it’s nice and hot. As much as I’ve been enjoying cooking up stir fry and baking things for the past few weeks, I think it’s time to cool off. How about I make us some cold lotus root salad and a refreshing cocktail or two?”
Zhou Zishu enjoyed good food, but he wasn’t much of a chef himself. Instead, he always splurged on the best restaurants in town or visited Qin Jiuxiao for some of Jing An’s great cooking. Still, as he watched Wen Kexing’s videos he felt like he could do a thing or two in the kitchen. He would prefer Wen Kexing to just make the delicious food for him though.
"Come along, let's head to the kitchen."
There’s a close of Wen Kexing’s face just before the video transitions, and Zhou Zishu always pauses to take him in. He looks especially gorgeous when the sun hits him just so. His smile is perfect, almost blinding.
When the video cuts to Wen Kexing in the kitchen, he’s tying his apron. It’s more of a formality as Zhou Zishu has never seen Wen Kexing spill so much as a drop on himself in his videos. It just adds to the domestic feel of the whole thing.
Wen Kexing goes through every detail of what he’s cooking, always explaining where to find the best ingredients. There were plenty of close-ups of his hands as he elegantly chopped vegetables, mixed up ingredients, and plated the final product. As he cooked he talked about life, music, and anything else that came to mind.
“My mother used to make this for me all summer. After I came home from playing we would eat together. It’s little things like this that help keep her memory alive.”
Wen Kexing smiled softly as he added a flair of garnish to the plate. Zhou Zishu loved the moments when Wen Kexing opened up, even if it was just a little. It made him think about how he wanted to honor his parents as well. It had been years since their accident which resulted in his adoption into the Qin family.
“Now, doesn’t this look delicious? I wish I could feed you all a bite, but you’ll just have to trust me.”
Wen Kexing brought his plate to the table and sat down. Zhou Zishu didn’t know what he was hungry for the most, but just as Wen Kexing was about to taste his creation there was a knock on the door. Zhou Zishu slammed his laptop closed as Jing An walked through the door. She was carrying two grocery bags. Walking in behind her was a young woman in scrubs, carrying a hefty nurse bag.
“Zishu-gege, I brought Gu Xiang to meet you. She’ll be helping you while you heal.”
Before Zhou Zishu could go on about how he didn’t need a nurse, Gu Xiang burst out in laughter.
“Ah, Miss Jing, the way you described him, I thought Zhou Zishu was a grumpy old man!”
Zhou Zishu was left speechless as Jing An hid a smile with her hands.
“Miss Gu, don’t tease him too much. He’s very tough on the outside but he has a nice soft heart.”
“Are you telling people I’m softhearted? Please, I can’t even defend myself.”
“Alright, alright, I’ll make you some dinner while you two get acquainted.”
Gu Xiang took a seat on the couch across from Zhou Zishu’s recliner. She was cute, with her purple scrubs and matching shoes, and her hair up in a bun with bangs clipped at the side.
“Miss Jing told me you’ve already run off two nurses by being unruly.”
“I’ve already told them that I don’t need a nurse. I’m perfectly capable of sitting here and healing by myself.”
Gu Xiang rolled her eyes and leaned back on the couch. Zhou Zishu wanted to get back to his video but he was much too embarrassed to watch it with other people around. Instead, he thought he should get to pushing Gu Xiang away.
“I can get myself from here to my wheelchair, and that’s all I need.”
“I’ve heard it all before, Zhou Zishu! Do you think I’m here because I just love spending my time with grumpy men that think they can do it all themselves?” Gu Xiang crossed her arms and leveled him with a quite serious look. “What happens when you’re trying to reach for something and end up breaking your hip or your other leg? Then you’re bedridden and I have to give you sponge baths, is that what you want?”
Zhou Zishu couldn’t help but laugh at this young woman scolding him, but he had no rebuttal. If he really wanted to get out of this cast as soon as possible and get on with his life.
“Fine… But I’m not going to be happy about it.”
“Good enough for me.” Gu Xiang added before giving him a smile. “Don’t worry Mr. Zhou, you’ll be all healed up in no time!”
Gu Xiang got up and headed to the kitchen, helping Jing An finish up dinner and pack the leftovers away. They talked more about when she would come help him (from ten to five every day) and what she’d be doing (reminding him to take his medicine, physical therapy, making sure he ate, etc). Jing An set up Zhou Zishu’s dinner, taking his laptop and setting it down so she could give him his food tray. He thanked her and promised that he wouldn’t be too hard on Gu Xiang.
“I’ll get going now, gege. There’s enough for the next few days, so remember to eat well. Is there anything you want next time I come by?”
Zhou Zishu thought back to Wen Kexing’s video.
“Maybe some lotus root? If you can find it, I’d like some lotus root salad.”
Gu Xiang gave him a surprised look but quickly covered it up before leaving to walk around the apartment.
“Mm, that sounds great, I’ll find some for you.”
Jing An left him with a hug, leaving the spare key for Gu Xiang. The nurse came back to the living room and took Zhou Zishu’s dirty dishes, giving him a glass of water.
“You’re the Zhou Zishu? The writer?”
Zhou Zishu blinked, watching her as she tidied up a little.
“You know me?”
“Of course I do. I got my big brother your book for his birthday.”
“Oh. Well, thanks for your support.”
Gu Xiang giggled, pattering around the house a little more before checking her watch. She took out a sheet of paper and scribbled some info down.
“Alright, I have to get going. I’ll be back tomorrow but if you need any help, call me. Be good!”
Zhou Zishu grumbled as she picked up her back and headed out.
“Be good, what am I, a child?”
As soon as she was gone, Zhou Zishu picked up his laptop again and opened it up. Wen Kexing’s video picked up exactly where it left off.
“Alright, let’s eat.”
Wen Kexing picked up his chopsticks and tried a bite of his creation. He let out a satisfied hum and smiled at the camera.
“As always, delicious!”
Zhou Zishu paused at his smiling face, committing the face to memory. It was expressions like that one that reminded him of his beloved Zhen Yan the most.
******
“Gege, I’m home!”
Gu Xiang waltzed into the condo she shared with Wen Kexing, slipping off her work shoes and putting on some fluffy slippers.
"A-Xiang, I'm in the kitchen. Come try this! It's for my next video."
Gu Xiang happily came over and Wen Kexing had a plate full of mini cakes for her. She gave him a side hug before grabbing a cake and eating it up.
"Mmm!!! So good, as always."
She reached for another cake but Wen Kexing already snatched the plate away.
"No more until after dinner."
"Ugh, you treat me like a kid!"
"Mhm, go and wash up. Dinner is almost ready."
Wen Kexing and Gu Xiang had found each other as kids in an orphanage. Wen Kexing was a 16-year-old trans boy and Gu Xiang was a toddler, barely walking before she was left on her own. Both of them had no one else in the world and Wen Kexing kept tabs on her and took care of her. Once he was aged out of the system and on his feet, he adopted Gu Xiang. Since then, the two of them had always looked out for each other.
Survival was something that Wen Kexing knew a lot about. When his parents passed and he got thrown into the system by his father's estranged family, he had to take care of himself. As soon as he was able to work he took up odd jobs and was lucky enough to land a job as a line cook. He was paid under the table as a teenager and learned a lot about cooking and life. Wen Kexing kept working hard until he was able to afford a place big enough for himself and Gu Xiang and could live comfortably as himself.
Over the years he had become a professional chef and earned good money at the restaurant he worked at. Still, he had wanted something new. He also wanted more money to put Gu Xiang through nursing school. That's how he started his YouTube channel, sharing his charming personality and the recipes he had accumulated over the years.
Eventually, it had become his full-time job. Wen Kexing was living well and had almost everything he wanted.
One person was still missing though.
Gu Xiang came back just as the dinner table was set for two. They sat down and started talking about their day as usual.
"The new video I posted already has tons of views. You wouldn't believe the comments I got on it."
"Oh, that reminds me! I think my new patient is a fan of yours. You won't believe who it is!"
"Hmm, someone famous?"
It had happened before. Many people watched Wen Kexing's channel to learn how to cook or just for comfort.
"Maybe famous to you. It's that writer you're always talking about. Zhou Zishu!"
Wen Kexing's fork fell from his hand, clattering on the plate. Gu Xiang was surprised at his reaction and couldn’t help but laugh.
“Oh my, gege! I’ve never seen you so starstruck before. Should I get you an autograph?”
“He’s- you’re sure that it’s the same man?” Wen Kexing tried to put on a cool face but he was floundering. It had been twenty years since he had seen Zhou Zishu, and the man was a fan of his?
“I’m sure. He confirmed it himself.”
When his thoughts caught up with him, Wen Kexing almost sprang out of his chair.
“You mean he’s sick? What’s the matter, is he alright?” Was Zhou Zishu bedridden? If so, Wen Kexing had to go to him and take care of him.
“He’s fine, he’s fine! He broke his leg and he’s stuck in bed.”
“Broke his leg?!”
“Calm down! He’ll be fine, gege. Don’t give yourself a heart attack.”
Wen Kexing took a deep breath to center himself.
“Alright. I’m calm.”
“I thought you only liked his writing…”
“Well, we might have a little bit of a history…”
“Whaaat??”
“Before I went to the children’s home, we were childhood friends. And maybe,” Wen Kexing turned his head and shrugged. “We kissed.”
“Ugh, gross. Anyways, why didn’t you tell me that!”
“I didn’t think you would meet him at work, of course. Besides…that was before my transition. I doubt that he even recognizes me.”
Wen Kexing was sure that if Zhou Zishu knew that he was his old childhood friend, he would have reached out. Even if it was to close the chapter.
It had happened so fast that Wen Kexing never had a chance to say goodbye or tell him that he had a new name. When his parents died he was barely allowed to mourn before he was dropped off half the country away. When he finally looked up Zhou Zishu and found his blog, it had already been fifteen years.
He was afraid to reach out first, not wanting to be rejected. He was an entirely different man now, and even if Zhou Zishu had transitioned as well, Wen Kexing wasn’t sure if he would still want him.
“Well, now is your chance to see him again. I told you he definitely watches your videos. He even asked his sister-in-law to make him lotus root salad.”
Wen Kexing’s heart felt ready to beat out of his chest. Zhou Zishu watched his videos and liked the food he made?
“Alright, but we’ll have to go through this slowly. I don’t want him to feel cornered.”
“Sure, sure. I’ll talk to him more about it tomorrow. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me!”
They finished dinner but all Wen Kexing could think about was Zhou Zishu. His beloved was so close and yet it felt like there was still a chasm between them.
*****
Having Gu Xiang around wasn’t as bad as Zhou Zishu pretended it to be. None of his usual antics (frosty attitude and no cooperating) worked on her a bit. And she was shockingly strong for her small stature, so even playing dead didn’t help. The young nurse made sure that he ate, stayed clean, and wasn’t bored. At the end of their first few days together, Zhou Zishu had to admit that he enjoyed having her around.
His favorite part was taking walks in the local park. Gu Xiang didn’t mind pushing him through the paved trail, insisting that she was getting her steps in. One day as she was pushing him back to his apartment, she asked him a question.
“Mr. Zhou, tell me something?”
“What is it?”
“You watch Wen Kexing on youtube, don’t you?”
Zhou Zishu thought about dashing away, but that was hard to do with a full leg cast. Instead, he crossed his arms and turned his head.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Gu Xiang pushed his wheelchair over inside the living room and moved to stand in front of him.
“You know your ears turn red when you lie.”
“They do not!” Zhou Zishu suppressed the urge to cover his ears and pushed himself toward his recliner.
“I’m not asking to make fun of you, you know! I know the guy!”
“....What?”
Gu Xiang chuckled and helped him into the recliner.
“I noticed it when you talked about the lotus root salad. He had just posted the video so it was fresh in my mind. Anyways, we’re close.”
Zhou Zishu looked everywhere except for the nurse in front of him. He felt ridiculous, like a schoolboy with a crush. Still, he never expected anyone to know his guilty pleasure or for the man to be so close to him.
“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell everyone that you have a crush.”
“I don’t have a crush! I just…enjoy the food.”
“Sure, sure.”
“...What do you mean by close?”
“Hmm? Oh, you know, I see him here and there. I can put in a good word for you if you want.”
“That’s not necessary… I don’t want to be weird about it.”
“Are you sure? You don’t want to…pass on a message or anything?”
Zhou Zishu thought back to how he felt while watching Wen Kexing’s videos. He knew that Gu Xiang wouldn’t let it go until he said something.
“Just tell him he reminds me of an old friend. And that I find him comforting.”
****
“Gege, have you ever kissed anyone?”
Zhou Zishu and Zhen Yan were sitting by the river, basking in the late summer sun. Zhou Zishu had his shoes and socks off and his jeans rolled up so his feet could be cooled by the river. He had taken off his hoodie and folded it up to use as a pillow. When the two of them were alone, he didn’t feel the need to cover up his body. Zhen Yan laid horizontal to Zhou Zishu, head resting on his stomach. They were mindlessly plucking the grass out around them.
“No. Why are you asking?”
Zhen Yan doesn’t answer but simply rolls over until they’re face to face. They kissed him softly, pulling back quickly and breaking out in a smile.
“Haha, your first kiss is mine!”
“You!”
Zhen Yan sprang up and ran away laughing while Zhou Zishu got up to chase them. They ran for a while until Zhou Zishu was able to catch them, only to steal a few kisses of his own.
****
When Gu Xiang told Wen Kexing what Zhou Zishu said, he was at a loss for words. Zhou Zishu didn’t know who he was but still found comfort in him. His anxieties about not being accepted by his first (and only) love were instantly quelled.
And Gu Xiang was annoyed by Wen Kexing constantly asking about Zhou Zishu’s health. Every time she got back he would ask if he was eating well, doing his physical therapy, and staying healthy.
“Why don’t you ask him yourself!”
So, Wen Kexing decided that he needed to put a plan in motion. He was still nervous about Zhou Zishu’s reaction to him. Would he recognize him when they were finally in a room together? Would he be upset that it’s taken Wen Kexing so long to meet him again?
It’s fine if A-shu is a little bit mad at me…he’s cute when he’s angry.
Wen Kexing wanted to see Zhou Zishu’s face scrunch up in anger. He wanted him to roll his eyes at him and pretend he wasn’t going to do exactly what Wen Kexing asked of him. He missed him so dearly and wanted to make up for lost time.
***
Zhou Zishu was beginning to go crazy from being stuck in his chair for so long. Even with Gu Xiang’s chatter and the promise of more walks, he had never stayed in a place so long. He was itching to get back out but it would be weeks until his cast came off.
Wen Kexing’s serene voice was the only thing keeping him sane at that point. Gu Xiang had set up his smart tv (a gift that had been sitting there for far too long) so now he could watch him on a bigger screen. It was nice to see all his elegant movements in greater detail. He had pretty much seen all the videos on his channel so he usually watched some of his favorites as he waited for a new video to drop. He sprinkled in some nature documentaries and trashy tv so Gu Xiang wouldn’t think that was the only thing he watched.
“Mr. Zhou, I’m here and I brought soup!”
Gu Xiang came in with a big takeout container and took it straight to the kitchen. Zhou Zishu sat up and turned so he could see what she was doing.
“You brought me food?”
“Mmm, and this time it’s dinner and a show! Check the channel, there should be a new video.”
Zhou Zishu had checked less than an hour ago but to his dismay, there wasn’t an upload. Still, he checked again and was surprised to see that a video had just dropped. He clicked on it and it started, like all the others, in the beautiful garden.
“Hello everyone. Thank you so much for tuning in again. Today we’re doing something a little different, and making food for someone else! Today I’ll show you how to make a soup with healing properties for a loved one that’s healing from a sickness or injury. Let’s go to the kitchen.”
Zhou Zishu watched as the video transitioned and Wen Kexing was in the kitchen with his apron on. His signature smile and warmth were secondary to Zhou Zishu’s shock that he was making soup for..him!
“Now, you probably don’t know this but my little sister is a nurse, and-”
Zhou Zishu paused the video to swing his head back and yell at Gu Xiang.
“Sister?! You didn’t tell me that you were his sister!”
“Well, I told you we were close! Anyways, keep watching.”
“-her newest patient is actually someone I know. I won’t get too into it for his privacy, but he’s the author of one of my favorite books. Unfortunately, he’s under the weather, so I thought I would make something for him.” Wen Kexing looked into the camera with a big smile, one that made Zhou Zishu’s heartthrob. “I hope you feel better, my friend.”
Zhou Zishu really hoped that he wasn’t blushing as deeply as it felt like he was. Watching Wen Kexing cooking for him, even if it was through the screen, warmed him from the inside out. He felt like a kid again, watching his mother make him a special breakfast when he was sick and didn’t go to school. It felt like he was safe, taken care of, and loved.
Wen Kexing made a chicken and mushroom soup, heaped with loads of vegetables, herbs, and spices. While he was cooking he talked about each ingredient and the benefits. Some of the descriptions of herbs were taken straight from Zhou Zishu’s book. Wen Kexing was smart, and a devoted student.
I suppose we’ve been admiring each other for a while now.
“Now, I’m sending this with my sister, so I’ll have to trust her with the presentation this time. But this is how it should look. I hope she’s taking notes.”
As Wen Kexing plated the soup onscreen, Gu Xiang presented Zhou Zishu with his hot soup on his tray table. It looked like a perfect replication of what was on the tv screen, and Zhou Zishu could only thank her. Wen Kexing sat at the table, spoon in hand.
“Remember to eat well, stay hydrated and get plenty of rest. Get well soon and we’ll take a walk among the flowering trees, okay?”
Wen Kexing took a sip of the soup and Zhou Zishu followed suit. The taste was so delicious that Zhou Zishu had to close his eyes to just appreciate it. Wen Kexing sounded off on his video like he usually did and his outro soon played.
Zhou Zishu didn’t talk while he ate the rest of the soup, his first full meal of the day. Usually eating just felt like a chore that he didn’t want to do since he was barely moving. Now, he wanted to eat well and heal so he could walk with a man that seemed to truly care for him.
Gu Xiang took the bowl away when it was empty and Zhou Zishu started up the video again, watching it on a full stomach. He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, falling asleep soon after while listening to Wen Kexing’s soft voice and the sounds of cooking.
“Gege, what if you called me didi instead of meimei?”
“Can I call you A-Shu? A-shu, A-shu, A-shu!”
“When we get older, let’s live together! I’ll cook for you every day gege!”
*****
“He’s sleeping, stop calling me.”
Gu Xiang was relaxing on the couch as Zhou Zishu slept. Wen Kexing had already called her twice and she had finally picked up. He was in the kitchen, pacing back and forth.
“Did he like the soup? He ate it all right?”
“Yes, yes, he finished the whole bowl. Shall I pass the phone to him so you can listen to him snore too?”
“Ah, A-Xiang, I’m just worried about him. He needs to heal well.”
Zhou Zishu came slowly to consciousness to the sounds of Gu Xiang arguing with her brother. He turned slightly in the chair to look at her.
“Mr. Zhou is awake, shall I hand over the phone?”
“Is that him?” Zhou Zishu asked, and Gu Xiang nodded. Zhou Zishu reached his hand out and she handed her phone over. When he put the phone to his face, he couldn’t hear anything from the other end.
“I have you to thank for the soup and all the comforting videos?”
There was silence for a beat, and then Wen Kexing let out a chuckle.
“Zhou Zishu, you sound so wonderful, even over the phone.”
The voice was a little different from the videos but soothing nevertheless.
“I knew you were the flattering type.”
“Mm, only for A-Shu.”
“Shall I tell that to all your loyal fans and followers?”
They both laughed, and Gu Xiang tried not to grimace. They chatted a little more, mostly teasing words before Wen Kexing asked Zhou Zishu a question.
“Should I bring A-Shu more soup for lunch tomorrow?”
“Yes, you should. And congee for breakfast, with scallions and eggs.”
“What about dinner?”
“Surprise me.”
“Oh, I will.”
They hung up and Zhou Zishu handed Gu Xiang the phone back.
“Ah, it’s like listening to an old couple. Come on, Mr. Zhou let's get you cleaned up and ready for the night. He won’t leave me alone unless I take good care of you, which I always do!”
Zhou Zishu wasn’t difficult for once, too excited at the prospect that was the next day.
****
Wen Kexing got up early every day but made sure to wake up even earlier to prepare everything for his Zishu. He had been almost too excited to sleep, tossing and turning all night with thoughts of the next day. He wondered if Zhou Zishu would recognize him once they were in the same room together.
Part of him doubted it though. He had changed so much since they last spoke. He hadn’t used his old name since his parents had died and his family had betrayed him. Wen Kexing didn’t think that there was any Zhen Yan left in him.
Either way, if he could have Zhou Zishu in this new life, it would finally be complete. Even if he had to charm and seduce him all over again, he would do it happily. With this invitation, he was already halfway there, so why not put his best foot forward?
He got to the market with his list, getting all the fresh ingredients he would need to make food for the day. Wen Kexing swore to stay simple, not wanting to be in the kitchen all day. Still, finally being able to cook for the person he had loved for so long made him want to put his best foot forward.
Wen Kexing returned from the market as Gu Xiang was eating breakfast. He hurried her up out of the door and to Zhou Zishu’s apartment.
“He’s never up this early, so don’t be surprised if he’s not there to greet you.”
Gu Xiang walked ahead while Wen Kexing carried all the grocery bags. She unlocked the front door and waltzed in while announcing their arrival.
“Mr. Zhou! We’re here! Rise and shine!”
There was no sound of acknowledgment but she seemed used to that and kept walking in. She pointed out the kitchen and Wen Kexing made his way to it. He set down his bags and got to work on some congee. He could vaguely hear Gu Xiang talking but to the response of no one. He almost wanted to tell her to let Zhou Zishu sleep more, but he really wanted to see him.
Gu Xiang came back to the kitchen with no one else.
“He’s so grumpy, I don’t know why you like him so much.”
“Hush, and help me put all of these away.”
By the time the congee was done, rustling came from the bedroom. Gu Xiang headed down to help and as Wen Kexing was setting down the warm bowl, Zhou Zishu came in on his wheelchair. He looked sleepy, but still ethereally handsome. Wen Kexing stood there for a moment when they made eye contact, admiring how handsome his beloved had become.
“A-Shu, I hope you’re hungry.”
Zhou Zishu turned his head away, trying to hide his pout.
“What a nickname. Am I a child?”
“Ah, A-Shu, can’t I call you that? I want to!” Zhou Zishu was finding that his face felt warm as he was in the presence of Wen Kexing.
“Whatever, I’m starving.”
For the first time in a while that Zhou Zishu actually ate at his dining room table. Even before his accident, he mostly used it for papers when his desk overflowed. Sitting for breakfast was just something he never did, especially not with an exceptionally handsome man watching him with a smile on his face.
“Stop staring at me.”
Zhou Zishu stuck his spoon out to poke his cheek, but Wen Kexing took hold of his wrist. Finally, they were close enough to touch.
“Do you like it, Zhou Zishu?”
When he looked into Wen Kexing’s eyes, Zhou Zishu saw an old friend. A friend that he hadn’t seen in so long, but could never forget.
“You…”
“Me?”
Wen Kexing blinked and tilted his head, face full of mostly innocent admiration. Zhou Zishu thought that it was better not to ask hard questions just yet. Besides, it could all just be a coincidence.
Zhou Zishu was too smart to believe that, but he wouldn’t push it. Instead, he would push Wen Kexing’s bowl closer to him and motion to his spoon.
“Eat, it’ll get cold.”
Wen Kexing grinned and grabbed a spoon, dutifully digging into his meal.
After breakfast, Zhou Zishu wheeled himself into the bathroom to clean up while Wen Kexing cleaned the kitchen. Wen Kexing hummed a soft song while he worked, and Gu Xiang helped Zhou Zishu into his recliner when he came back.
“Shall I put on your favorite show, Mr. Zhou?”
“Don’t you dare.”
Gu Xiang chuckled, as Wen Kexing brought Zhou Zishu a smoothie. It was green and Zhou Zishu made a face when he looked at it.
“What is that?”
“It’s a fruit smoothie, I added tons of greens for you A-Shu. It’s full of healthy things so you can recover quickly.”
“It looks disgusting.”
Wen Kexing placed a straw in the drink and set it on Zhou Zishu’s side table.
“Drink up.”
“No.”
“A-shu!”
“I don’t want it.”
Wen Kexing leaned closer with a little bit of a pout.
“It’s good for you.”
Zhou Zishu rolled his eyes but grabbed the smoothie, intent on taking just one sip and pushing it away. When he took a sip, he was pleasantly surprised that it didn’t taste disgusting. In fact, it was quite delicious. Wen Kexing sat down on the couch with a triumphant look as Zhou Zishu drank the whole thing. Gu Xiang was surprised that Zhou Zishu actually listened when she had to pester him all day just to get him to take his meds.
Eventually, Gu Xiang had to busy herself doing something else, leaving the two men to their heated tension. Wen Kexing sat on the couch, pretending to watch whatever nature documentary was playing while looking at Zhou Zishu every other minute.
God, he’s so handsome. He grew up so well.
He was going to fall over if he kept it up, so he finally stood up.
“Maybe I should start on the soup.”
“Wen Kexing, where are you from?”
Zhou Zishu lifted his head to look him in the eye.
“Oh, you know. Here and there.”
Zhou Zishu didn’t respond other than rolling his eyes and turning back to the tv. Wen Kexing grinned and leaned on the recliner, getting in his space.
“Why are you so curious? Does A-Shu like me?”
“I was trying to remember when I had tasted that soup before. It’s been so many years, I’d almost forgotten.”
“Hmm? What do you mean? That soup was homemade, an original recipe!”
Zhou Zishu looked back at him, eyebrow raised.
“You won’t tell me?”
Wen Kexing put on his most innocent face, even kneeling down on the floor so he was looking up at Zhou Zishu.
“I don’t know what you mean. I made that soup recipe myself!”
“That's strange, because I remember Mrs. Gu Miaomiao making this exact same soup.”
How could Wen Kexing possibly forget?
That summer, their last summer together, Wen Kexing had gotten the flu. When Zhou Zishu visited and ended up getting the sniffles himself, Gu Miaomiao had made them both the very same soup. Wen Kexing had forgotten a lot of things about his childhood, but the soup had found its way back to him.
“Lao Wen, did you forget about it?”
Wen Kexing turned his head away, afraid that he would start crying right then.
“I really thought it was just a coincidence. I mean, it’s just soup. I thought they were all coincidences. The way you talk, the food you made, even your eyes. I was so sure that I would never find you again that I thought it was all in my head. But seeing you now…”
Zhou Zishu’s hand was gentle when he laid it down on Wen Kexing’s head. He didn’t press down, didn’t pull him closer, he just laid his warm hand on his head.
“Why couldn’t I find you?”
Wen Kexing suddenly felt like a kid again. Lost, mourning, and thrown away. He remembered how desperately he wanted to go back to that summer and how scared he had been to face Zhou Zishu again.
“After..I changed my name after. That name, it’s long gone.”
“Alright. Wen Kexing. I like it. But still, you knew about me. You didn’t want to see me?”
“It’s not like that,” Wen Kexing turned back to look up at Zhou Zishu with his trademark pout. “I was nervous. I’m so different than I was before…”
Zhou Zishu felt the sudden urge to flick him on the head but he restrained himself. Instead, his hand trailed down and cupped his cheek.
“You were the first person that saw me as the person that I am. I see you too, Wen Kexing.”
“Then that’s all that matters, right?”
They spent much of the late morning and early afternoon talking about what they had missed. Wen Kexing had kept up with all things Zhou Zishu for years, so it was mostly the former telling the latter about his life. What happened after his parents died, how he met Gu Xiang, and all the things that led him to his youtube channel. Zhou Zishu listened with his heart in his stomach. He wished that he could go back in time and take Wen Kexing back home with him after that summer. It was not that simple but he was sad that they had lost so much time.
“Enough about, tell me how you broke your leg! I almost ran here when Gu Xiang told me about it.”
Wen Kexing was sitting on the chair of the recliner, leaving barely any space between them. Zhou Zishu felt warmth, no longer used to having someone so much in his space.
“It was just a hiking accident.” Zhou Zishu explained how he had gone out alone and taken a tumble, only saved because Qin Jiuxiao had his location. Wen Kexing was downright horrified.
“Hiking alone? A-Shu, how could you! No more, never again.”
Zhou Zishu chuckled, pushing Wen Kexing playfully.
“What, are you going to come with me now?”
“Of course I am. Someone has to take care of you, since you won’t do it yourself!”
“So overbearing,”
“You like it.”
Zhou Zishu did in fact, like it.
****
“Come on Mr. Zhou!!”
“No, I can’t.”
Gu Xiang was helping Zhou Zishu with his physical therapy in the living room while Wen Kexing made dinner in the kitchen.
“There have to be some embarrassing stories about my brother when you two were kids! Tell me, tell me, please!”
“He’ll never let me hear the end of it if I do that.”
Gu Xiang sighed, helping him go through his stretches.
“You two are no fun.”
“Alright you two, enough talking about me. Dinner is ready.”
Wen Kexing set the table for three, and Zhou Zishu wheeled himself over while Gu Xiang sat down. The dinner served was a stir-fry, topped with lots of meat and vegetables. Zhou Zishu found that his appetite was back in full effect and he ended up eating the whole thing. He ate in silence while Wen Kexing and Gu Xiang filled the room with their chatter.
He tried to stay up longer but the combination of a full stomach and tired body had him dozing off in his chair a couple hours later. Gu Xiang had already left, so Wen Kexing came over to him.
“A-Shu, come on. Let me help you to bed.”
Zhou Zishu didn’t fight him, letting himself be helped into his chair and taken to his bedroom. His bed was set up so he was slightly reclined so he could get out of bed without help if need be. Once he was in bed, Wen Kexing put his hair up so it would get in his face.
“You’ll be alright if I leave you?”
Zhou Zishu wanted to cling to him like a child. He wanted to pout and tell him to stay with him, to keep him company. He felt silly though, and simply nodded his head.
“Sleep well, A-Shu. I’ll be back tomorrow.”
Wen Kexing kissed his forehead before heading out of the bedroom, shutting off the lights. Zhou Zishu listened until Wen Kexing closed the front door and fell asleep soon after.
****
Zhou Zishu woke up the next morning to the sounds of shuffling coming from his kitchen. He expected Gu Xiang to loudly announce herself but it never came. He stayed in bed until he was convinced to move by his full bladder and the delicious smell. When he finally came into the kitchen, Wen Kexing was setting the table for two.
“Good morning, A-Shu. Did you sleep well?”
“Where’s your sister?”
“A-Xiang had a work emergency. I told her I would take care of you, so don’t worry.”
Zhou Zishu took his spoon and dug into his breakfast.
“Why don’t I believe you?”
“A-Shu, I’m serious! Aren’t you happy to spend all day with yours truly? Don’t worry, A-Xiang told me everything I need to know about helping you out. First things first, a healthy breakfast. I’ll get your meds ready while you eat.”
Zhou Zishu was already halfway through his bowl of congee, trying to ignore Wen Kexing’s fluttering around. He was dressed in all linen today, perfect summer clothes for the active socialite. Zhou Zishu was wearing the same old thing: a big pajama shirt and shorts that could accommodate his cast. With his cast, he could only do so much when it came to cleaning up. It made him feel frumpy and even more uncomfortable.
Wen Kexing came back with another glass of water and Zishu’s meds. After swallowing the offensive pills, Zhou Zishu noticed a huge duffel bag by the door.
“What’s that?”
Wen Kexing grinned, clearly glad that he asked.
“That’s everything we need for our self-care day! A-Shu had been in this cast for over a month now, and you still have a few weeks to go. Why don’t we refresh you a bit.”
“What do you know about refreshing someone?”
Wen Kexing tapped his nose, and Zhou Zishu looked greatly offended.
“I worked in the back of a spa when I was younger. Mostly cleaning up but you know I pick up on things quickly.”
“So many odd jobs, what a man of mystery.”
“Mhm, let’s get started then. I got a robe just for you!”
Zhou Zishu didn’t think he had much of a choice, so he strapped in for the day.
***
Zhou Zishu’s bathroom wasn’t huge, but it was a decent size with a square glass shower and an average-sized bathtub. The vanity had enough space for the essentials and not much more. So Zhou Zishu wasn’t sure how Wen Kexing fit what felt like a full-blown spa experience into it. He supposed that if anyone could do it, it would be Wen Kexing.
After being examined after his fall and during his surgery, Zhou Zishu couldn’t find it in himself to be very self-conscious. Still, he couldn’t help but feel warm as Wen Kexing helped him shower. He had brought a stool and enough plastic wrap to seal his cast off from the spray. Before he had stripped, Wen Kexing had asked if he was comfortable having him help. Zhou Zishu pretended to act aloof, but when he was under the spray he could only hope the hot water would hide his blush.
Wen Kexing used an exfoliating sponge first, scrubbing his skin with care. Zhou Zishu wasn’t sure what he was using but it smelled like herbs and flowers. After the wash, he used some kind of moisturizer, applying it liberally. His hands carefully traced his body, stopping at his top surgery scars. It had been years so they were faint but the feeling of his calluses would have made anyone shiver. But Wen Kexing didn’t linger or comment, even when they made eye contact. Even when he scrubs up his thigh, mere centimeters away from Zhou Zishu's privates. He simply rinsed his body off before helping him dry and applying more body cream before he slips on his robe. Zhou Zishu ignored the warmth spreading from between his legs and to his stomach as Wen Kexing washed his hair next. The feeling of his scalp being massaged and his shoulder hair being cleaned was almost enough to make him fall asleep.
Once he was done cleaning him up in the shower, Wen Kexing put Zhou Zishu on his stool in front of the mirror, hair wrapped in a towel to dry.
Zhou Zishu wasin such a good mood that he even let Wen Kexing put a clay face mask on him. Though Wen Kexing assured him that he didn't need it.
“Your skin is so perfect A-Shu, just like every part of you. Long legs, a perfect waist, you really have it all.”
“Ah, I see. This was all a lure so you could leer at my body.”
“Of course, you wouldn’t have let me look at you otherwise.”
“You little-” Zhou Zishu managed to grab Wen Kexing’s ear, only letting go when he pouted.
After rinsing off the face mask and applying more skincare products than Zhou Zishu had ever used, they finally left the bathroom.
He got dressed in new silk pajamas, a short sleeve shirt and shorts combo. He sipped a smoothie while Wen Kexing clipped his nails and toenails. He even applied cuticle oil afterward. Zhou Zishu thought he could definitely get used to this kind of treatment, even after he was out of his cast.
Finally, Wen Kexing brushed some oils into his hair and put it in a bun, letting a couple of strands down to frame his face.
“There, don’t you feel so much better?”
When he didn’t answer, Wen Kexing leaned down to face him.
Zhou Zishu was asleep, all self cared out.
Wen Kexing kissed his forehead and let him sleep in his freshly pampered state.
***
A few hours later, Qin Jiuxiao was unlocking the door and letting himself in.
"Zhou Zishu! Jing An told me to bring some snacks for you. How are things going with your new nurse-"
Qin Jiuxiao stopped in his tracks at the scene before him. Zhou Zishu was sitting at the table and Wen Kexing was trying, and failing, to feed him walnuts. Just before they have been interrupted, Wen Kexing was telling him all the health benefits of the nuts and Zhou Zishu was telling him to get them out of his face. When the pair notices Qin Jiuxiao, Wen Kexing stood up and greeted him with a soft bow of his head.
“Hello! Nice to meet you!”
Wen Kexing blinked, then frowned and looked at Zhou Zishu.
“Who is Jing An?”
Zhou Zishu rolled his eyes, throwing a rouge walnut at Wen Kexing’s head. “That’s his wife. You know Qin Jiuxiao, my little brother.”
Wen Kexing grinned and clapped his hands, coming closer to greet the young man.
“Qin Jiuxiao, all grown up! And with a wife, how wonderful.”
“Have we…met?”
Qin Jiuxiao was sure that he would remember meeting a man as tall and handsome as this. Wen Kexing looked like he stepped right out of a magazine.
“His parents are Mrs. Gu and Mr. Zhen.”
It took him a few minutes to connect the dots, but when it did Qin Jiuxiao looked even more surprised.
“Oh! I thought-”
“I changed my name. For…a couple reasons. I guess the last time you saw me I was still wearing skirts full time. Here, I’ll take these into the kitchen.”
Wen Kexing took the bags from his hands and headed to the kitchen. Qin Jiuxiao headed to the table and sat next to Zhou Zishu.
“You look happy.”
“No, I don’t.”
“You’re glowing.”
“I did a face mask.”
Qin Jiuxiao laughed but changed the subject.
“Where’s Miss Gu? Did you run her off?”
Wen Kexing came back with the snacks on a tray and presented them to the table.
“A-Xiang is my little sister. She had a work emergency, so I’m taking care of my A-Shu today.”
“Who’s yours?”
Wen Kexing didn’t answer, just pushed snacks in front of Zhou Zishu. Qin Jiuxiao had only just got there and felt like a third wheel. Even though Zhou Zishu put a front of aloofness on, his younger brother could see how much better he felt with Wen Kexing there with him.
“I wanted to remind you about your doctor’s appointment next week. I’ll come and pick you up in the morning.”
“Alright, sounds good.”
“Wen-ge, would you like to come with us?”
“No!” Zhou Zishu said at the same time Wen Kexing said ‘Yes of course!’ They both looked at each and Wen Kexing grinned.
“It’s boring, don’t come.”
“Why not, I want to go with you.”
“Why?”
Wen Kexing leaned into Zhou Zishu’s space. Zishu refused to look away and the staring contest began.
“Because I like you.”
Zhou Zishu had to turn away to save face, but just ended up looking at a smiling Qin Jiuxiao.
“Should I go?”
“You shouldn’t.” Zhou Zishu protested.
“Stay for dinner! In fact, tell your wife to come over.”
“Actually, maybe you should leave.”
They didn’t stay for dinner that day, but Zhou Zishu just knew that everyone and their mothers would know that he and Wen Kexing were basically cohabiting in his apartment. Qin Jiuxiao just loved to tell him business.
Not that Zhou Zishu hated the idea of living with Wen Kexing. He could pretend that he just wanted to eat all his food, but he knew that wasn’t true. He was gone for Wen Kexing all over again.
***
The days went like that for a while as Zhou Zishu healed. At his latest doctor’s appointment, they told him that he would be getting his cast off soon. He was happy but knew it was only the beginning of his healing journey. He would have to go through more physical therapy to get back to how he was before the accident.
“Zishu-gege, I can’t believe that you’re firing me for him!”
Gu Xiang was upset, arms crossed as she sat at the breakfast table. Wen Kexing placed down their plates and she dug in, seemingly forgetting about her woes.
“I’m not firing you, our time is just coming to an end. Once this cast is gone I’ll be able to do more for myself.”
“And everything he can’t do, I’ll do for him.” Wen Kexing was really loving this, poking his little sister’s nose.
“Like I said, I’m being replaced! Gege, aren’t you busy with your channel?”
“I’m on a short hiatus, is that a crime?”
Zhou Zishu wouldn’t say that they were dating, but that’s only because he was fooling himself. Since Wen Kexing had started coming over they spent almost every day together. They reminisced about their childhood romance, talked about their times apart, and even spoke of the future. Wen Kexing wanted to take his channel and cooking far and wide, and Zhou Zishu wanted to work on his new book.
“I just know as soon as Zishu-ge is healthy enough to travel you two will be hard to reach. I’ll call and you’ll be somewhere in the mountains! Even in the jungle!”
Wen Kexing chuckled and pinched her cheek in his brotherly way.
“We’ll come back from time to time so A-Xiang won’t be lonely.”
“Just sent pocket money instead.”
***
“Mr. Zhou, now that your cast is off, don’t forget you still need to take it easy.”
The doctor helped Zhou Zishu get stable on his crutch and walked him out of the exam room.
“I know, I’ll be careful.”
“Do you have anyone to help you out?”
They walked back into the waiting room, where Wen Kexing was waiting.
“I do, thank you Doctor.”
Wen Kexing came up to him, standing close to Zhou Zishu’s side.
“A-Shu, you’re cast free! Come on, come on.”
They both thanked the doctor and took care of the bill before heading out.
“Oh, it’s the most beautiful day, don’t you think A-Shu?”
“It’s raining.”
“But we’re together, and you’re walking!”
“Limping.”
“My A-Shu it always so grumpy.”
“Who yours? And who’s grumpy?!”
Wen Kexing looped his arm around Zhou Zishu, holding the umbrella over him and keeping him from falling. Before he could push him away, Wen Kexing kissed him.
“You’re mine, and you’re grumpy.”
Zhou Zishu had never thought of himself as someone that was easily flustered, but he found that Wen Kexing made his face burn.
“Just help me get home before I fall in a puddle and break my leg again.”
“Don’t even joke about that!”