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Lilia sits at the edge of the riverbank, throwing stones into the water. He watches it crash against the water, splash, then sink to the bottom.
Lilia wraps his arms around his legs, which are pressed against his chest knees up. He lays his head against his knees and sighs.
Lilia hears footsteps walking up to him, but pays no attention nor readies for attack. He’d recognise the sound of Bauls footsteps anywhere.
He ignores Baul, even though he can hear him sit on the dirt next to him. Leaves crunching as Baul scoots closer to Lilia. He places a hand on Lilias shoulder and Lilia doesn’t fight him.
“Hey,” he starts, and Lilia hisses in response. He doesn’t want him here. Anyone but Baul when he’s the reason he feels so down.
Baul laughs and Lilia can feel his heart ache. A deep emptiness spreads while a strong passion grows.
“Lili?” Baul asks, rubbing his back. Lilia hates that nickname, hates how happy it makes him, hates how badly he wants Baul to call him it every day of his life, hates how good it feels simply because it is Baul.
Lilia almost misses when Baul asks him what’s wrong. He doesn’t want Baul to know.
“I… I think I’m in love with someone,” with the way Lilias hair is loose, Baul can’t see any part of his face. Thank goodness for that, as he’s almost as red as his highlights.
Baul places his hand on Lilias head and he feels so safe, so vulnerable, so upset it’s not going to happen the way he wants it to.
“That’s normal,” is all he says, despite being loud. Baul has always been a man of few words.
“He won’t want me, we’re in war, I can’t have this,” Lilias voice trembles. Baul scoots closer wrapping an arm around Lilia comfortingly.
“Try, when it’s over, try,” Lilia looks up, face no longer hidden.
“I’m scared,” Lilia slowly unfolds, spreading his legs out, he leans against Bauls chest and Baul pulls him close, “Baul, it hurts,”
Baul presses a kiss to his forehead, a common platonic gesture among two friends. Lilia still can’t help but to fantasise about the thought of Baul kissing him on the head in the mornings, a way to greet him after they awake together in the mornings.
“After all this passes, I’ll take you to that nice bakery you like, and I’ll court you,” Bauls smile is so gentle, his eyes so warm. Lilia feels like he’s under the light of the moon.
“How long have you known?” Lilia asks, nervously twisting a lock of his hair. Baul holds Lilia close and leans his head on top of Lilias.
“Since the day you stopped making eye contact with me,” Baul gently holds Lilias chin, “look at me again, I missed you looking at me,” Lilia trembles. He looks Baul in the eyes.
“I’m sorry,” Baul smiles at Lilia again, and his eyes are so much warmer when he looks directly into them.
“It’s okay,” Baul then kisses Lilia. It lasts just a few seconds and Lilia rushes his hand up to his lips afterwards, patting them. He them looks down in embarrassment.
“Can I have another?” Baul laughs and stands up, pulling Lilia with him.
“At the bakery,”