Becoming A Hero

by Dorthea

Summary:

His brain tells him to get back up. To run. To get away. That the next attack will happen in just a second. That someone will come, and they’ll shoot a bullet through his head. That’s it. End of Peter Parker. But his body doesn’t respond to anything. He can barely lift his arms, because it feels like an elephant is sitting on his chest.

Peter knows this is the end. Knows nobody will get to him in time… he’ll bleed out, in the desert sand. Alone.

His eyes feel heavy and slowly he closes them. Tries to breathe, knowing he can’t. Tries to forget the pain, but he can’t do that either. It digs through his chest, not like a bullet, no… It’s sharp and hard. There’s not one, there are a million. A million little things in his chest. But he can’t see them.

And soon, he can’t see anything, but darkness…

***

In an alternate universe Peter Parker wins a competition to meet Tony Stark, only things goes horribly wrong when Peter is kidnapped in Tony's place. His life on the line, Peter only has one option... he has to become a Hero.

 

“Heroes are made by the path they choose, not the powers they are graced with.” – Tony Stark.

Notes:

Tag will update as the fic is posted.

Chapter 1: Principles (Prolog)

“Heroes are made by the path they choose, not the powers they are graced with.” – Tony Stark

 

 

The bulletproof west feels warm and bulky under Peter’s clothes. The baking sun stands high in the sky above them, and he wonders how Tony Stark manages to look put together despite all of it. Peter feels sweat running down his back, soaking into his T-shirt, but Tony Stark stands in that black suit, and black sunglasses, a smug smile on his lips as people gather around him.

Peter is twenty-one, a college student at ESU, working on self-sustaining energy, and… he’s poor. He doesn’t have the money or the sponsors to do all his fancy testing or gather the materials he’d need. So, when his professor, Dr. Octavious, recommends that Peter participate in a competition hosted by Stark Industries’ September foundation, Peter follows his advice. A few weeks later, he is informed that he won. His project will be sponsored, and Peter gets to partake in Tony Stark's next weapons demonstrations.

He’d landed in Afghanistan earlier that morning, greeted by General Rhodes. The man hasn’t left his side once since he walked off the plane. They’re in a high-risk zone, and Peter is a civilian.

“Is it better to be feared or respected?” Tony Stark starts his speech, and people stop talking around them. The whole thing seems pretty, Peter doesn’t know, lackluster. Tony Stark is the most famous man walking on earth, but there’s no podium for him to stand on, no microphone to elevate his voice. It’s just him, in the middle of a desert with a big giant weapon. “I say, is it too much to ask for both? With that in mind, I humbly present the crown jewel, of Stark Industries’ Freedom Line.”

Peter looks between the military men, watching as they stare at the air as if they aren’t saying anything. The speech sounds boring, and Peter can truthfully say he thinks he might fall asleep. He pinches himself and tries to push through it.  

Getting his project covered was a big help with his studies. It meant he could work fewer hours, in a desperate attempt to gather enough money from this specific metal, or that odd part. The Tony Stark meeting was, well, Peter wouldn’t say he didn’t appreciate it. He just wasn’t a fan. Not like the other people at Peter’s school. Young adults all looked to Tony Stark as if he were a God who would make or break their careers.

Maybe he was.

“They say the best weapon is the one you never have to fire. I respectfully disagree. I prefer the weapon you only fire once. That’s how Dad did it. That’s how America does it. And it’s worked out pretty well so far.” Stark points towards the triple missile system, and everyone's heads follow the direction he points. “Find an excuse to let one of these off the chain, and I guarantee you, the bad guys won’t even want to come out of their caves.”

He gives a single signal with his head and the missile turns into its ready stands. It hums to life. A second later it fires into the air, makes a big curve over the fake battlefield, and when it starts to dip downwards, it splits apart. A million smaller rocket appears from it, leaving tails of smoke in the air, as they rain down over the mountain chain. “For your consideration, The Jericho.” They all hit as he says it, glowing explosions acting like a backdrop. He spreads his arms out, the perfect press photo.

A second later, the blast reaches them. The power of it shakes the ground below them, and the pressure makes Peter’s ears pop.

If this is what they came for, Peter can almost understand that so many soldiers showed up. The adrenaline, the excitement throbs through his veins. Peter isn’t big on weapons, but this? This was almost, kind of cool.

With that, it’s over. People start returning to their heavy-duty military cars. “What did you think Kid? Impressive right?” Stark comes to greet home, throws an arm over his shoulder, and guides him along. It’s awkward. The older man opens one of the cooling boxes and grabs himself a whisky. Its heavy odor makes Peter’s nose itch. “Want one?”

“No thanks. I don’t drink.” But Stark did. The smell of alcohol was clear on him now that Peter was so close to him.

Stark throws at him and takes a long sip of his drink. The ice clicks against the glass. “Rhodey can you believe this? Is this the type of generation young people being now, can’t even drink a whisky?”

General Rhodes shrugs at his first and gives Peter a soft, apologetic smile, “Don’t mind Tony here. So, you’re the winner of the September Foundation, what’s your project? Weapons?”

“G-green energy, sir.” Peter feels his voice cracks as he answers, “Self-sufficient energy.”

Stark snorts into his glass, “Ah, the mini arc-reactor. You know that project always was just a proof of concept. You can’t make it smaller. Rhodey, are we leaving, I’ve got a warm sake waiting at my plane.”

General Rhodes nods a second later. Guiding Peter and Stark towards the cars. Rhodes is about to guide Peter into the same car as Stark when the older man waves over a few other soldiers. “Why don’t we put him in the fun-vee? Teach the kid how to party, would you?”

Rhodes looks between the soldiers and Stark, before looking back to Peter. “Will you be okay with these guys for twenty minutes?” He asks carefully, not putting pressure on him.

Peter gives a hesitant nod. Half relieved he won’t have to listen to Stark on his way back to base. What was the worst that could happen? These were trained professionals. They spend every day of their life fighting and protecting. It wasn’t like General Rhodes would be far away either, just in the car behind them. That was fine.

So, he gets into the fun-vee as Stark calls it, and soon they’re rolling through the desert.

He feels almost like a cool VIP sitting alone in the back of the car. Someone special, like Stark, needs to be protected at all costs. Even if he isn’t. He’s just a stupid kid who doesn’t drink and spends too many hours in a too-small, not properly-equipped college laboratory.

It’s also, a little creepy. The guy beside him keeps looking at him, and the guy in front of him has eyes in the mirror all the time.

“What up with the staring, never seen a young adult before?” Peter attempts to joke.

“Jackson, stop scaring the kid” the driver, a woman, comments from the front seat, “Don’t mind them. Mr. Parker. General Rhodes are just, concerned about your safety. Bad press, you know?”

Peter nods and sips slowly from a water bottle he’d been offered earlier. His mouth feels dry.

“You wouldn’t happen to be Mr. Stark's kids, right?” The man in the front seat asks suddenly, “I mean, same hair, same eyes, clearly smart, the only kid to ever be brought to the base, Rhodes being protective…”

“Uh, no… just, competition winner.” Peter feels his cheeks blush. The awkwardness of everything hits suddenly, and he wishes he was back in the car with Rhodes. Even if that meant being in the same car as the man who’s known for making weapons and being too drunk to show up and get his award. Because yes, Peter had seen that all over social media.

He doesn’t have much time to feel the award energy though. One second, they’re driving towards the base, the next there’s a fire in front of the car and it’s shaking, and Peter feels sick to his stomach. Watches as the front doors open, and soldiers stumble out, trying to find and take out the attacks.

Outside gunfire echoes around the car, and Peter’s ears are ringing. Not because of the sound, but because of the memory. Blood against concrete. Cold skin. Pain. Screams. Fear.

“What’s happening? Why are they attacking?” The guy in the back with Peter pulls him down to the floor of the car. It’s not clean, but it’s safer.

Peter tries to make himself as small as he possibly can. His heart is racing. A bullet cracks the front window, and another shatters it. Glass falls in over him and the soldier. There’s glass in his hair, and under his t-shirt, but he stays there. The soldier covers Peter’s head with his hands the best he can, trying to prevent further injuries. “Okay Mr. Parker-“

“Peter” Peter grasps out, “Just, Peter, please?” Please…

“Peter” Jackson nods, “I’m going to have to go out there. You don’t leave this car, you don’t get up unless you have no other choice. You hear me?” Peter gives a stiff nod. The soldier pulls a dark hoodie up from the back and throws it over Peter’s head and back, hiding him. “Someone will get to you when things clear up. General Rhodes will get to you. Nothing is going to happen to you. You have my word. We won’t let anyone hurt you.”

The door swings open, every sound grows louder. It feels like he’s standing out there, bullet flying around his ears. A moment later Jackson slams it back closed. Peter can’t see what’s happening out there, and can’t hear anything anymore. Just bullets and screams and shouts. He wonders if General Rhodes is out there.

He hadn’t wanted to go at first. He hated weapons and was only in it for the money. He wanted to change the world for the better, and was there a better way to do that, than science? Because this fight only brought people in danger. It was May, oh god May, who’d convinced him to take the opportunity in front of him. Now… he’d never see her again.

Something loud explodes outside, and the remaining windows of the car shatter too. But not just that, the whole appears in the metal car. Big, scary holes. Peter could fit his phone and hand through one of them.

There, he sees someone running towards the car. Their head is covered by a mask. He isn’t there to save Peter, he’s there to kill him. To kill the whole group.

Peter grasps for the door handle in his side of the call and stumbles out and away just as the man opens the car. It’s a battle zone, bullets are flying, the air smells like death… and Peter runs towards the first and best safety spot he can find. A small rock formation. It would have to do, for now.

He almost slips as he gets there. Falls on his knees and presses his back against the desert stones. Trying to make himself invincible.

A part of him wants to dig through his pockets to find his phone. Wants to call the emergency number General Rhodes had given him, beg for help, beg for someone to find him. Blood. Concrete. Cold. Fear. Scream. Another part of him wants to call May… wants to say goodbye.

Peter does neither, too scared to move anywhere. Too scared they’ll spot him. They know he’s here… they know… they know… Something comes crashing to the ground beside him. If he reaches out, he’d be able to touch it, but he doesn’t want to. He wants to run. Run, run, run. Run, where? Doesn’t matter, get up, run, getaway.

Because besides he lays a bomb. Dark green, except for two words printed down the side… Stark Industries.

He barely gets up, barely makes it two steps, before it explodes. Before his lungs are filled with fire and ash, he’s thrown backward. His head hitting the rock formatting hard. Dark spots are dancing in his vision. He feels dizzy. His ears are ringing, louder now. Not because of memories, because of pain and sounds. Or late of sound.

His brain tells him to get back up. To run. To get away. That the next attack will happen in just a second. That someone will come, and they’ll shoot a bullet through his head. That’s it. End of Peter Parker. But his body doesn’t respond to anything. He can barely lift his arms, because it feels like an elephant is sitting on his chest.

There isn’t. There aren’t elephants in the desert.

Peter’s t-shirt feels wet and warm in a way it shouldn’t. His hands grasp at it, trying to get the weight off his chest, allowing air back into his lungs, allowing his heart to beat again. It’s torn, the T-shirt, and when Peter’s hands leave it they're covered by blood. His blood. Its metallic smell combines with gunpowder in his nose, and he’s sure he’d throw up if he could. But he can’t.

He manages to tear the front of the t-shirt open and catch a glimpse of a hole in the bulletproof west that General Rhodes had helped him get on. See the blood seeping from his chest.

Peter knows this is the end. Knows nobody will get to him in time… he’ll bleed out, in the desert sand. Alone.

His eyes feel heavy and slowly he closes them. Tries to breathe, knowing he can’t. Tries to forget the pain, but he can’t do that either. It digs through his chest, not like a bullet, no… It’s sharp and hard. There’s not one, there are a million. A million little things in his chest. But he can’t see them.

And soon, he can’t see anything, but darkness…

Chapter 2: Bereavement

Summary:

Ben nods, “And you think you can do it? You think you can create it?” Peter nods stiffly. He’d do anything to make Ben proud. “Then, if I can make sure you walk down the best path for you, don’t you think I have a responsibility to support you?”

A responsibility. That was something Ben loved to throw around. That Peter had a responsibility to himself, to follow his dreams, and a responsibility to the world to do whatever he was capable of doing. Both Ben and May made the world a better place every day, and Peter could do that too, in whatever way worked best for him.

“With great power… must also come, great responsibility” Peter echoes.

4 years earlier

Early spring leaves New York City warm and green. The trees are Central Park glow in the afternoon lights, kids are running on skateboards or playing football. Adults are chatting, drinking wine on red and white blankets. There’s a calm in the city, as the new year truly sets in, and tonight might be the liveliest night of them all. Students are celebrating and students are crying. Because acceptance letters, and sorry you weren’t accepted letters have started rolling in.

Peter takes a deep sigh of relief, sinking on the park bench. Ben is at his side. May’s working late, so it’s just the two of them. It feels like they barely ever have moments like these anymore. Eating colorful ice cream at the park, like a five-year-old and their parent. Peter enjoys it and feels the safety of Ben being close to him.

“I got my first letter today” Peter reveals as they sit there, watching the sun disappearing behind the buildings of New York, “I’ve been accepted into ESU.”

Ben smiles at him kindly, pulling him close – into a half hug – as they sit on the bench. It’s like the night when he’d been accepted into Midtown High School of Science and Technology. It had meant the whole world then, and ESU seemed like it was the whole world, now. It was a real chance for Peter to do some good in the world. A chance to show what he was capable of with a proper lab, and great teachers to guide him in the right direction.

“That’s wonderful Pete, your parents would have been so proud that you’re following in their footsteps.” Ben sounds truly happy, truly content as he says it. Peter finds himself leaning even closer to his uncle. It feels warm, as the cold spring nights are near. “With a scholarship?”

Peter shrugs, “That’s to be determined. But yeah, hopefully.” He’s seventeen, and with a scholarship, he’ll never have the money to go. ESU was expensive. The college always was. Maybe Peter would be better off going straight to work or doing something like Ben. Becoming a police officer, or enrolling in the military. Plenty of his classmates had plans like that. Flash was just an example. He seemed to be excited when he talked about it. While Peter wasn’t his friend, he was happy that Flash had a plan for his life. Wanting to do good, too.

“That’s okay” Ben comments, “We’ll figure it out if you don’t get that scholarship.”

“What?” Peter couldn’t believe his ears, Had Ben just… “Do you have any idea how expensive college is?”

Ben gives a soft chuckle and nods. Of course, his uncle knows. They’d decided to take Peter in after his parents died, and that meant making sure he got an education and a life. But Peter couldn’t take that from them. “Peter…” Ben meets his eyes with softness, “I know what you’re thinking, so let me ask you something. What do you want to achieve by going to ESU?”

“I want to make the world a better place, in whatever way I can. I… I don’t know how yet, maybe I’ll cure cancer, or figure out a way to stabilize buildings during earthquakes. I don’t know, but something, anything to protect the people of the world.” Peter says it, and he means it. It was what he’d written about in his application too. He needed to make the world better because he couldn’t just stand behind, if he had the chance, the ability, to do something.

Ben nods, “And you think you can do it? You think you can create it?” Peter nods stiffly. He’d do anything to make Ben proud. “Then, if I can make sure you walk down the best path for you, don’t you think I have a responsibility to support you?”

A responsibility. That was something Ben loved to throw around. That Peter had a responsibility to himself, to follow his dreams, and a responsibility to the world to do whatever he was capable of doing. Both Ben and May made the world a better place every day, and Peter could do that too, in whatever way worked best for him.

“With great power… must also come, great responsibility” Peter echoes. He’s heard it enough times. One of many things Ben reminded him of. Well, that and the fact the weapons never solved problems, only created more of them.

“Exactly.” Ben ruffles Peter’s hair. “Peter, you can, the power, to make the world a better place through science. So, you have a responsibility to do just that.”

Peter takes it in. Nods slowly. They finish their ice cream and walk through the park, towards the subway station. Shoulder against shoulder, like best friends, like family. At times Peter wishes he could have done stuff like this with his biological father, but tonight, he just enjoys it. The city noise around them. People rushing through the street, on their way home. Together.

His uncle stops suddenly as they reach the subway, eyes scanning the street around them. Peter feels his stomach clench. Ben was a cop, a good one at that, always aware of his surroundings.

“Ben?” Peter asks in a whisper. His uncle reaches for his service weapon and badge. He shakes his head at Peter and nudges him a few steps down into the subway before he turns around. Walks quickly after an older man, holding a young girl in a tight grasp. The girl’s crying for her mom, for her dad, for help. Peter’s heart clenches.

“Hand where I can see them!” Ben’s voice rings through the street. Deep and determined. “Let the girl go.”

The man turns around, hands tightening around the little girl’s wrist, to reveal a gun. Peter feels his heart skip and beat, and Ben points his own at the criminal. “Or what? You’re gonna shoot me?”

“She hasn’t done anything wrong,” Ben takes a step closer, voice steady, unaffected, “Whatever you’re trying to achieve, you don’t need her. Let her come to me, and I’ll let you go.”

The man gives a dark glare to Ben and then to the little girl. He’s calculating his next move. Peter wants to step in and wants to show Ben that he knows how to take responsibility too, but he doesn’t have the training or the tools to do anything.

Ben readies the gun when the man doesn’t move. Ready to pull the trigger, but before he can, the move pushes the little girl towards Ben. She stumbles to the ground between them. Tears in her eyes. “Please…. Help… I’m scared…” But in the end, she has nothing to fear, the man takes his aim and fire in quick succession.

The sound of the bullet rings out, and people are suddenly screaming. Running through the street, not to catch a subway, but to live. Peter feels stuck. He can’t move. Can’t do anything but watch as Ben slumps to the ground, blood pooling below him. The man is gone in seconds.

“Ben? Ben!” Peter finally manages to move. Runs towards his uncle. Kneels by him. There’s so much blood. Ben looks pale as he lays there, shirt soaked. “Someone, call 911! Ben, Ben can you hear me? Ben!”

 

***

 

“Is this seat taken?” It’s his first day at ESU, summer break over, and a new life beginning. Honoring Ben’s wish. Changing the world because Peter had the chance to. He shakes his head at the stranger. A woman his age, dark curls frame her face. “Nice to meet you, I’m Michelle.” She greets.

“Peter, Parker.” Peter returns, “Nice to meet you too.”

It’s his last class of the day and probably Michelle’s too. Outside of Ned – his best friend since middle school – Michelle is the first person he’s talked to at ESU.

She takes the seat next to him, pulls her stuff out, and starts sketching. An artist. Most of Peter’s classes were focused on the science of technology. Chemistry, engineering, physics, math, it was like a dream come true. He’d never felt probably challenged at Midtown, despite it being a STEM school. At ESU, the level would change based on the individual student. But it wasn’t all science. Once a week, the last class on a Wednesday like today, Peter would be joining an art class. Not because art was something that inspired him – that was a lie, Peter loved photography – but because it would hopefully help him when sketching new inventions.

And sure, maybe it also had something to do with the fact, that he needed a break that wasn’t all about science. His therapist had recommended that he do something, different. That he allowed himself to have fun. That not everything needed to be about responsibility.

He looks at Michelle’s drawings. Recognizes the student she’s drawing, a boy in the front of the lecture room, a panicked expression on his face. “You’re a pretty good artist” Peter compliments.

Michelle looks up with a smile, “Thanks, Peter.”

“So, are you an… uh, art major?” Peter asks carefully and feels his cheeks blush. He’d always been awkward. That was a simple fact about Peter. Awkward and insecure, but Ben and May had always managed to push him out of his shell a little. He’d done decathlon at Midtown, and gotten friends like Liz and Abe. With a little luck, maybe Peter could figure it out on his own this time.

Michelle doesn’t seem weirded out, so that’s a win in Peter’s book. “I’m majoring in journalism. How about you?”

“Electrical engineering, with a minor in Computer engineering,” Peter responds.

“Science nerd?” Michelle questions with a grin. Peter nods with a short chuckle. He’d been unsure of what route to go, but EE and CpE have seemed like two good choices. However, so had mechanical engineering… he could always supplement later. After all, he had plenty of experience building robots and such already. Or… biophysics. But Peter had a plan, an actual idea of where he was headed. Biophysics would have been more interesting, and useful. “What a loser” she jokes.

“Oh really. Must be a pretty cool loser for a girl like you, to talk to me.” Peter nudges her foot playfully.

Michelle’s grin grew wider, “Caught me there, Peter Parker.”

“Uhm…” Peter feels his heart skip a beat. People always talk about love at first glance. This isn’t love, Peter doesn’t think. But he does enjoy Michelle’s company. “If you don’t have any plans after class, would you, uh, maybe like to go grab a coffee? With me? I mean, fair if you don’t want to, because we’ve just met, or maybe you don’t have time, and- And I’m trembling, aren’t I?”

Michelle looks down at her phone for a second. Checks something. Then she nods, “I’d love to grab coffee. Hear everything about this Loser I met in class today.”

“Really? I mean, cool. Awesome. I know this little place down the street if that’s cool. The Coffee Bean.”

“Totally Loser.”

 

***

 

“So, morning class with Dr. Octavius today, right?” MJ asks as they lay in their shared bed, in their shared apartment. A coffee date turns into two, turns into a lifetime. Peter wraps his arms around her and feels her warm skin against his. Some mornings he wishes he could stay right there and pretend that the world outside doesn’t exist, but it does, and so Peter nods and moves to get up after another long moment of enjoyment. “How’s the project going?”

Peter shrugs pulling on his jeans are shirt, wrapping himself in a warm hoodie. It’s December, and their apartment is freezing. “Great, yeah, perfectly great. Laking the proper funds, but we’re slowly getting there.”

“Well, one day it’s going to change the world. It’s self-sustaining energy Pete!” MJ smiles and sits up, blanket wrapped around her shoulders, “And I’ll get to write the first article about it.”

He leans in and places a soft kiss against her lips. She returns it happily. “You’ve already reached your goal. Didn’t the Bugle offer you a job as a part of their team?”

“That’s different Pete. There have been a great journalist’s before, telling people the truth, being clear and direction” MJ explains, “I’ll be one of many, who work together to change the world. You’re doing it all on your own. Now, you should probably get going, don’t want to make Octavius mad that you're late… again.”

 

***

 

“Mr. Parker. Peter, would you mind staying behind for a minute?” Dr. Octavious asks as the class ends and students start moving out into the hallway, reading for their next class, or lab time. Peter nods and makes it down the steps, backpack heavy against his back. “I’m quite impressed with your work on that mini reactor project, it’s good work, and you have a lot of potential.”

“Thanks, professor” Peter smiles kindly.   

“Have you heard about the September foundation?” Peter shakes his head, “I didn’t think so. It’s a Stark Industry project. They’re offering a chance for the full founding of a student project. I think you’d have a good chance if you participated.”

Full founding? That would be a dream for any new scientist, and Peter was no exception. He had no doubt students from all over the country would be fighting to be the best of the best. Million maybe. Parker luck had never treated Peter well, had never treated any Parker well, and so winning seemed like a far-away dream. And… “But my project isn’t even functional yet. It’s, barely a proof of concept.”

“Because you’re lacking materials and opportunity” Dr. Octavious smiles. “I know you’re busy with your project, but if you do find the time to write something down, an experiment, or make a 3D model of the reactor, let me know. It has to be turned in before the end of the year, so it’s only a few weeks left before it’s too late.”

Yeah, okay. “I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I’m asking.”

 

***

 

“Cheers to one of my brightest students, Congratulations Peter.” Otto raises a glass, and the group follows him. MJ, Ned, Liz, Abe May, and Peter of course. He’d won. His project had impressed the judges behind the September foundation, and soon his whole project would be paid for by Stark Industries. It feels amazing, knowing that he’d be able to actually finish, actually go out and change the world, just like he’d promised Ben he’d try to.

The tall glasses click against each other, and people sip the sweat, and bobbly drink with smiles on their lips.

Peter had always been guaranteed a good job when he was done with his education. He was beyond smart, he was for lack of a better term, a genius. He never liked using that word though. It felt so… rash. Like he was playing himself up, pretending to be something that he wasn’t. Now, however, maybe he could get his lab someday, thanks to this. Thanks to Otto. Peter could feel the thrill just thinking about it. Parker Industries didn’t sound too bad.

“Dinner is my treat tonight” May smiles as they walk out into the city later. MJ Peter and May.

“May” Peter smiles, grasping for MJ’s hand, “You don’t have to do that.”

May gives him a knowing look, “I know, but I want to. Ben would have wanted to celebrate this. It’s a great opportunity. I couldn’t be prouder of my nephew.”

“You haven’t even heard the best part yet,” MJ informs with a grin on her face and laughter in her voice, “As a part of being the winner, Peter has been invited to meet Tony Stark himself, see him present a new piece of technology.”

“Tony Stark, you say, that’s a big deal. Are you excited Peter?” May asks kindly.

There was a reason Peter hadn’t told anyone but MJ about the latter part. It wasn’t just any technology, it was a new weapon, that could kill a whole city with a single missile. Peter had never been into weapons, not really. He’d felt uncomfortable at something as simple and stupid as a gun, and it hadn’t helped that Ben had been killed… Peter honestly wasn’t sure he wanted to go at all. No, he was sure he didn’t want to.

“Pete?” MJ nudges him, clearly realizing that he’d been stuck in thoughts. It had been years since Ben’s death, and yet Peter could still hear the echo of the bullet flying through the street. Could still smell the blood in his nose and feel it under his hands as he’d put pressure on the wound.

He’d promised Ben he wanted to do better, be a good man… going to see something so, life-ending seemed like it might hurt everything that Peter had been trying to do.

“I’m not going.”

“WHAT?” May and MJ say at the same time loudly, “Oh Peter if this is about Ben, I know it’s been hard for you. But Ben would be so proud of you. He would want you to go out into the world and see things, experience it firsthand, make your own decision about right or wrong.”

May stops and pulls Peter in closes. Hugs him, in a way she hasn’t done since he was a kid. The last months, of working on a project, it had been hell. It had taken time and energy, and it had been a while since he last took a proper break. Maybe he looked just as bad as he felt.

“He’s the Merchant of Death, May” Peter tries to argue, but it’s weak. It’s just a nickname that some report came up with. It means nothing unless you want it to. Nobody knew who Tony Stark was underneath that PR smile and black suit. No One by Pepper Potts and General Rhodes. Maybe Peter could even learn from Stark. It had been his father, who built the original, full-size reactor to begin with. Maybe, Stark had been impressed by Peter’s project. “Are you sure it would be okay?”

“Peter, this is your chance to become who you’re to be” May smiles so brightly, “Nobody can stop you from doing what’s right.”

Notes:

Sorry if this chapter is a bit of a mess... I'm having a killer migraine.

Also, how is it easier to figure out stuff about figure skating, than what the best education choice is? I mean, purely for Fanfiction research reason.

Chapter 3: Heart

Summary:

Peter feels it before he sees it. Something hard against his chest, colorful wires running to and from it. Embedded, deep in his chest. He could feel it, the cylinder-like shape, every time he took a breath. “Be careful with it, please.” A man appears are his beside him. Peter takes his first real look at the world around him. A cave, dark and smelly and cold. The man gives him a soft smile, handing him a cup of water. “Slow sips, you don’t want to make yourself sick.”

Peter takes the cup and takes a careful sip. Despite the temperature, the water feels nice as it runs down into his stomach. “What… what is this? Did you do this?”

Voice…

Voices around him…

So bright.

… Ringing… Pain… Dizzy…

Red… red, red, red…

So bright… so many, voices… so…

So…

… Pain.

… Crying…

Who… Where… When…. How…

… Breath. Breath. Breathe…

 

***

 

The first thing Peter becomes aware of is cold. He feels, so cold. He isn’t sure he’s ever felt so cold in his whole life. It’s as if his body was encapsulated in a giant, block of ice. Of course, it wasn’t, Peter couldn’t survive that, but it was so, so cold. His whole body was shaking. If he could open his eyes, he’d expect to see snow dancing around him, his breath like a frozen cloud. That’s the second thing he notices, his body feels heavier than it should. His eyelids were weighed down by an invisible force, planted in every limb, in every fiber of his body. Paralyzed.

For a while, all he can do is lay there and wait… sense. There’s something hard and slippery in his nose, running down past his throat. It reminds him of hospitals, and from the pain in his chest, maybe that wasn’t a bad assumption. Something had happened, something scary, maybe General Rhodes had gotten to him in time. He’d promised that Peter would be safe with them…

Was May there? Was MJ there? Waiting for him to wake up. Pull himself out of unconsciousness, fight against whatever drug seemed to pin his body down? He couldn’t hear them, maybe they were sleeping, or maybe they’d stepped out to get some air.

Slowly his body starts responding. His fingers feel numb, but carefully he tightens his hands and unfolds them. Feels the sensation, and stretches them. And then suddenly it isn’t slow anymore. Everything comes washing over him, every sensation all at once. His head is found, his chest throbbing as a million needles dig through his skin and deep, deep into his core. Every breath, every movement, everything sends shocks of pain through him, and suddenly the world isn’t dark, because his eyes are open, and a single light shines far, far away. Not Hospital… No MJ or May… nothing…

His throat is dry, and his nose hurts, and his stomach feels empty and uncomfortable. He sits up. Sits up, but the tube in his nose, the tube to hurts his heart, pulls him back down.

He knows better than to pull them, knows to keep his fingers away, knows to wait, yet his fingers move to the first tube all the same. Grasps around the thin, stiff plastic that sits in his nose. And with one rough pull after another, it comes out. Sliming and bloody and wet. It brushes against the back of his mouth, and he can taste it, taste the cheap plastic vomit, and fear.

Peter is scared now. Terrified. His heart hammers in his chest, faster and faster. Where is he? How did he get here? Who brought him here? It isn’t the base, it’s not a hospital, so where… he was dead. He’s sure he was dead. He had to be…

… blood seeping from his chest.

Peter’s T-shirt feels wet and warm…

Tries to breathe, knowing he can’t.

Darkness…

He pushes himself up again, the aching in his chest worrisome. He needs to see. Needs to understand. Needs to know, what happened… who saved him… who would save some nerdy science boy, who was worth nothing…

Peter feels it before he sees it. Something hard against his chest, colorful wires running to and from it. Embedded, deep in his chest. He could feel it, the cylinder-like shape, every time he took a breath. “Be careful with it, please.” A man appears are his beside him. Peter takes his first real look at the world around him. A cave, dark and smelly and cold. The man gives him a soft smile, handing him a cup of water. “Slow sips, you don’t want to make yourself sick.”

Peter takes the cup and takes a careful sip. Despite the temperature, the water feels nice as it runs down into his stomach. “What… what is this? Did you do this?”

There’s a small fire before the bed, the man takes a seat there and starts cooking something up. It smells nice enough, and Peter's stomach growls.

“I did, to save your life” the man answers truthfully. Peter steadies himself against the bed, carefully lowering himself to the ground. His legs feel shaky under him, but it feels good being closer to the fire. Feeling the heat brushing against his face. “I removed all the shrapnel I could, but there’s a lot left, and it’s headed into your atrial septum.” The man throws him a little glass bottle, and black shards of metal fill it. “The rest of it is too deep. I’m sorry.”

“This…” Peter nods to his chest, “This stops it, from going deeper?”

The man nods, “I’ve seen this type of injury many times in my home village, The shrapnel will reach the vital organs within a week, it’s… painful. The electromagnet slows it.”

A moment later the man takes the food of the fire and hands it to Peter. Peter takes it and stares at it. It looks like oatmeal, something safe and homey. Ben would always make oatmeal in the morning…

“Eat, you’ll need your strength,” the man says, digging through a basket of old clothing and cooking pots until he finds what he’s looking for and throws it to Peter too. A hoodie, too big, but clean enough. He puts it on gratefully and eats as much of the oatmeal as he can muster. He feels nauseous, but if it’s mental or physical, he can’t tell.

The logical conclusion is that he’s been kidnapped. Why, Peter doesn’t have a clue. Is it this man who did it, probably not, but Peter wouldn’t know. Right now, all he knows is, that this man saved his life. He is the reason Peter didn’t bleed out in a desert. The reason his heart is still beating.

For now, that means Peter trusts him.

“Who are you?”

“Me?” The man points to himself, “I’m Yinsen.”

Peter nods slowly, Yinsen seems like a good enough guy. “I’m Peter” He must trust this guy. Otherwise, he’s alone. Peter doesn’t want to be alone. “Thank you, for all this…”

Yinsen shakes his head and moves closer. Pads Peter’s knee softly. “I’ve only postponed the inevitable, Peter. I won’t lie to you, the odds of anyone finding you in time, aren’t good. And now that you are awake, it is only a question of time, before they’ll start making demands.”

“Demands?” Peter feels confused. He wasn’t anything special. Just a college student. He could offer anyone, anything. No money, no crazy tech, nothing.

“I do not know the details. They are trying to keep things secret. But they will want you to build something.” Yinsen responds, eyes linger on the metal door. The only exit from the cave. Peter has doubts there are guards out there. “It’s still late, sleep now, talk tomorrow. Hm?”

Peter does feel tired. His whole body is working overtime to keep itself running. His eyes already feel heavy again, his head tilting slightly to the side.

Yinsen supports him softly, despite barely knowing Peter. Allows his head to fall to Yinsen’s shoulder.

 

***

 

It barely feels like minutes have passed when he’s shaken awake. Yinsen’s voice is sharp but not unkind, “Peter, stand up, do as I do and you’ll be fine. Okay?”

“Yeah…”

There’s bagging on the door. Peter suddenly feels wide away as Yinsen pulls him up to his feet. Yinsen puts his hands up above his head, Peter attempts to copy it but his hands feel numb and his arms heavy, so he rests them on the back of his head instead.

Through the door comes a large group of big men. They’re wearing dirty old military gear. Guns hanging by straps over their shoulders, Stark weapons.

The leader walks forward, hands out, a bright smile on his face. He speaks, but Peter doesn’t understand a single word. He’s never the language before. He wonders if Yinsen knows what to do, and how to act. The answer comes quickly as Yinsen starts translating, “He says welcome. He… is asking you to build one of Tony Stark’s weapons.” The man hands over a piece of paper, that Yinsen takes and shows Peter, “This one.”

The Jericho Missile. The one Peter had watched was demonstrated before all of this happened.

How long had it been? It felt like hours ago, but Peter didn’t know how long he’d been out. Was anyone searching for him? Did anyone realize that he was missing in the first place? Was he… did they presume him dead?

Peter looks at the pictures and swallows hard. He isn’t the creator of the weapon, he’d had no clue where to even start, let alone how to build it at all. That wasn’t Peter’s area of expertise.

“I… I can’t, I can’t… I don’t know how. It’s not my technology.” Peter answers. Yinsen translates.

The man makes a sound of annoyance and snaps his fingers at some of the guards. They jump forward, grasping onto Peter’s arms, forcing him down onto the ground. Kneeling before the man, as if he was a king. A big container of water is dropped before him, and with Peter’s weakened state, and his lack of strength in general, he has no chance of fighting it.

His head is pushed down into the water before he can even pull in a mouthful of air. Instead, he water. Ice-cold water fills his lungs. Something sparks, and pain surges through his chest. His heart skips a beat, then another and another, before it beats again. A painful, horrible pumping through his body.

Peter’s head is pulled up, just long enough for him to grasp for air before he’s dunked again, and again, and again. It’s like having an asthma attack, all over again.

Yinsen had told him they wouldn’t find him in time, that the shrapnel in his chest would kill him. So maybe he should give in, allow the water to enter his body, and drown out what life was left after his injury. The battery power slowly dwindled, until his heart would just stop, and Peter would move on, into the light…

Light… why did that make Peter’s brain ach? Why did that one thought, make him wonder…

He wonders if May and MJ knew yet, knew that Peter was captured, knew that Peter was dead, and knew that he wouldn’t come home again… because he wouldn’t. How long had he been here already? A few days, maybe. He’d been out cold. Here in the caves light never reached him, it could be day as much as it could be night.

Did Yinsen see the light too?

And it flickers to life in his mind, low a burning sun. He almost felt it in his grasp. Just out of reach. They wanted him to build something, and if Peter wanted out he needed time… They pull him up again, and he pushes through the pain and grasps out “Okay, okay! I’ll try.”

That’s good enough for them, and they rush to the next stop of the day.

For Peter it’s terrifying. He’s confused and sad and lost, captured by people, who thought I was someone that he wasn’t. Important.  But he had a plan now. It wasn’t remotely good, and it probably wouldn’t succeed, but he had to try something. Anything.

Peter and Yinsen are guided through the tunnels, and out into the backing sun of the desert. It feels oddly good, the sun against his skin burning, but it reminds him that he’s alive. That somewhere, May and MJ are out there, waiting for him to come home. Under this very same sun. Reminds him that by now, people know he’s missing, so they have to be searching. Right? They have to be looking for him, at least for a little while still. Even if that didn’t guarantee he’d live.

Their base of operation is, well, a hole in the ground. Sand fills the air above them, by down here between the mountains it doesn’t fly in the same way. There are crates all over the ground, and people running around with guns and blasters and rockets. Enough to bring down a whole town if they wanted to.

The leader speaks again, pointing around, a serious expression on his face. Peter looks to Yinsen who slowly translates once more, “He says they have everything someone would need to build the Jericho missile. He wants you to make a list of materials that you’ll need. He wants work to start immediately, and when the missile is done, he’ll… set us free.”

Peter knows that the last part is a lie. This man won’t them go, they’ve seen too much. He gives him his hand, anyway, pretending to be on the same side. Because he needs time.

“Okay.”

The man nods, a smile creeps onto his face, “Okay.” He echoes.

 

***

 

As Yinsen sits at their fire, cooking up oatmeal, Peter starts making his list. His experience with Stark weapons where limited, but he had done some research into the Jericho missile, as well as a few other big designs Mr. Stark had created. That would have to do.

His workstation would need to be well-lit, partly because he needed to see, but more importantly, that darkness was getting to him.

The light, the sun, it was a reminder. It was powerful.

He scribbles slowly on his notepad. Seeing his notes before him, in his brain. See his school lab at ESU. Welding gear. Soldering station. Helmets. Goggles. Smelting cup. Two sets of precision tools.

“I’m assuming you have a plan” Yinsen comments, sitting down next to him with two bowls of oatmeal. It’s bland, but the heated meal feels good in Peter’s mouth. “You aren’t going to build it for them, are you?” He nods at the list in Peter’s hand.

Peter flips his notepad over and shows him a quick sketch. “I’m a student at ESU” he explains slowly, “I won’t a competition to be here, yeah, seems stupid now. Ironically, the things I created to win, might also be our ticket out of here. A ticket to save my life…” Peter hesitates and shakes his head, “I’ve only ever gotten it to work on paper. It’s… theoretically.”

“It’s an arc reactor?” Yinsen comments looking at the drawing, “I saw the big one at Stark’s factory once.”

“A miniature version, yeah” Peter confirms.

“Something like that, it could run your heart for fifty lifetimes” Yinsen’s yes glitters with excitement.

He wasn’t wrong about that, only that wouldn’t be its primary use. “Or… something bigger for fifteen minutes.”

Notes:

Another day, another chapter :)

Chapter 4: Destiny

Summary:

Yinsen chuckles kindly helping him up. “What’s next?”

Peter is about to speak when the nausea hits him again, too quickly for Peter to react. Bill enters his throat, burns all the way up through his chest, and into his mouth. Sour, bitter, lumpy. He throws up on the cave floors, a brown mess of half-digested oatmeal and water.

“I think…” Peter tries to gain his breath when his stomach is finally empty, “I think I need to sit down for a minute.”

The list is handed over, the supplies are brought in, and somehow the cave transforms into a usable workplace. There’s a bunch of space for the project, more space than there was in his lab back at ESU. If he wasn’t so damn scared, terrified that he wouldn’t ever make it back home, he’d be impressed.

Yinsen and Peter eat breakfast together, sitting on the cold cave floor. “I have a kid around your age,” Yinsen tells him, “A daughter. She lives in one of the villages nearby.”

“Do you miss her?” Peter asks, chewing out oatmeal slowly. Trying to make it last a little longer. He’s hungry, and he’s barely been here a week. He can’t imagine how Yinsen must feel. The older man looks healthy enough, so maybe it’s Peter’s injuries that make him weaker and more tired.

“I do, every day” Yinsen nods, “But I know she’ll be safe with her mother.”

Finished, Peter discards his bowl and gets to his feet. The cave is big, but not too big. Even as he picks his workstation Yinsen and him can talk without issue.

The first and biggest problem when wanting to build an arc reactor was going to be palladium. He’d need quite a bit of it, too. He knew there were small amounts in certain types of Stark rockets, what purpose they held he didn’t know, but it didn’t matter either. Soon they wouldn’t be weapons anymore, they’d be pieces that could save Peter’s life.

He starts pulling the first one apart, Yinsen joins him at the table, watching over his shoulder. “I’m guessing you have family back home too?”

Peter carefully twists the end of the weapon, finding the screws holding it in place, and removes them carefully. “Uh, yeah…” He’d questioned that a lot after Ben’s death. Was May family? They didn’t share blood. Peter and MJ loved each other, but it wasn’t official. So did he have a family back home? The answer is yes. Because they were the reason he didn’t give up. They were the reason he was going to attempt this, knowing it would most likely fail. “My aunt and my girlfriend.”

“That’s nice” Yinsen nods as Peter pulls out the main part of the weapon, the controller. With that out, Peter should be able to access the main board holding the gunpowder further inside the weapon's metal shell. He reaches his hand in carefully and feels for it. His hands run against something sharp and cold, and he latches on to it and pulls the best he can. “What exactly do you need?”

The piece comes out and Peter moves to one of the other tables, finds his smaller tools, and carefully removes the tiny, tiny part that he needs. He holds it between the twisters. “This is palladium. It’s going to act as the core for the arc reactor.” It glitters in the cave lights.

“Can I help?” Yinsen asks, studying the metal.

Peter nods towards the remaining weapons, “You’ve got steady hands, so… you can go get the palladium from the rest of them.”

 

***

 

Building an arc reactor back in his school lab was impossible. At least, it felt that way most days. It had been his primary project ever since he started at ESU. And it wasn’t just funding standing in his way. It was the ability to get it working too… so imagine Peter’s surprise when it does work. He watches as it flickers to light between him and Yinsen, and knows then, that they have a chance of making it out alive. Both of them. Together.

He also knows that it’s going to be painful. He’d been blissfully unconscious during Yinsen’s first surgery on his chest, and while installing the arc reactor was going to be quick, it was also going to be painful.

“You know, I never managed to get it working in my lab at home,” Peter informs Yinsen as the older man prepares to place the arc reactor. “It worked on paper, sure. But…”

Yinsen chuckles at his statement, clearing his chest with a wet cloth. Carefully remove the wires and car battery. The pain as the shrapnel starts moving is immediate, Peter gasping for air as it hits him. Yinsen rubs his chest carefully, trying to keep him calm. They didn’t have much time. The Ten Rings were watching them. “Try and take a deep breath, Peter. It will help.”

Peter does try, closing his eyes as Yinsen’s hand enters his chest to find a spot to connect the arc reactor. When he does a single spark fills his chest, a painful bright spark. It echoes in his chest, pulsing through his body. He’s sure that the arc reactor must have failed. Too scared to open his eyes and see it dead…

In his mind he tries to picture it there in his chest, glowing as it powers the magnet that keeps him alive. He can almost feel it, humming in the same rhythm as his heartbeat.

Something clicks with a metallic echo, there’s another short pain followed by a wave of nausea, then Yinsen’s hands move away for a moment, before pushing something soft and wet against Peter’s chest. “It’s done. You did so well. Just keep breathing.” Yinsen’s voice is soothing. Peter wonders if he’s used that same voice on his daughter back in their village, praising her.

“It’s working?” Peter questions, feeling his voice shaky. He carefully opens his eyes, Yinsen is nodding at him with a soft smile on his lips. Peter’s chest emits a pale blue light. It makes him feel dizzy, seeing the blue circle in his chest, in a way Yinsen’s work hadn’t. His head spins as he sits up and takes a few hesitant breaths. Yinsen’s work at been good, but relatively painful as he breathed, now the pressure was almost gone. Yet he feels the cold metal in his chest all the time. “Gotta get used to it, I think. Damn, that’s weird.”

Yinsen chuckles kindly helping him up. “What’s next?”

Peter is about to speak when the nausea hits him again, too quickly for Peter to react. Bill enters his throat, burns all the way up through his chest, and into his mouth. Sour, bitter, lumpy. He throws up on the cave floors, a brown mess of half-digested oatmeal and water.

“I think…” Peter tries to gain his breath when his stomach is finally empty, “I think I need to sit down for a minute.”

 

***

 

“Are you sure you’re ready?” Yinsen asks helping Peter wrap his hands in tape and gaze.

Peter gives a stiff nod. The cave’s ceiling feels like it’s caving in above them, coming closer and closer during the months in the mountains. This is their last chance if they want to get out, the message was clear… Tomorrow. “Do we have a choice?”

Yinsen bites his lips and breaks off the tape end, handing Peter a thick leather jacket they’d been given at some point during their stay. It’s too big, Yinsen’s size, but Peter wraps it around his chest tightly. Then a pair of thick gloves, and a homemade leather scarf that Yinsen had created. The man had steady hands, and he was smart, smarter than Peter was. The man had met Tony Stark, had done science with the big league, but given it all up for a peaceful life here…

So much for peace…

The armor hangs before them. Peter feels a weird sense of pride looking at it, despite knowing the type of damage it could do. He didn’t want to kill anyone, just distract them long enough to get out. Which wouldn’t take much, if the flight system worked…

There are plenty of ifs in their plans. If the arc reactor didn’t breathe, if it didn’t lose power, if the fire worked, if no one realized too early if Yinsen’s bomb could open the door.

“Do you feel ready?” Peter returns the question as Yinsen opens the armor for Peter to enter. “I mean… you must be happy going back to your family.”

Yinsen shrugs, eyes distant, thoughtful. Peter carefully steps into the armor, and Yinsen closes the front plate before he starts bolting things into place. It wouldn’t be easy to get off again unless it broke, so that’s what they counted on. That the impact after the flight would release him.

“Say the plan again,” Yinsen asks.

Peter does exactly that, “Forty-one steps straight ahead. Sixten steps, right. Theirty-three, turn right again. Seventeen steps, turn left, should be able to see the light then.” Hopefully… “Yinsen, what’s wrong?” Peter can tell. Yinsen was a good man, happy and smiling despite being captured and stuck here. But now he wouldn’t answer. It made Peter feel uneasy.

Yinsen moves to the computer. The suit was too heavy for any normal person to operate, so they’d created a motorized skeleton that Peter would control. His computer engineer classes had come in quite handy, the code had been the easiest part of the project.

“Yinsen…” Peter stresses, feeling a lump in his throat. “Yinsen, please…” Something was wrong.

After a long second the green bar appears on the laptop screen and Yinsen meets his eyes. He moves to Peter, his hand brushing against Peter’s cheeks. “Peter… you have to listen to me, okay?” Peter nods silently. “You were never supposed to be here Peter, you've been removed from your path. Your destiny. You must find your way back to it. Because the person you were almost meant to become.”

“Yinsen…” His voice breaks.

“Don’t cry, I’ll buy us the time you need to get out. It will be okay. Okay?” Peter swallows and can’t find words. “Whatever happens, don’t look back. Don’t waste it. I’ll be just fine. I promise.”

He can hear Ben in Yinsen’s voice. That desperate need to protect someone smaller than themselves. Save someone. She hasn’t done anything wrong. Whatever you’re trying to achieve, you don’t need her. Let her come to me, and I’ll let you go.

A loud crash echoes through the caves, and chaos erupts. People are screaming, and calling for help, and guns and weapons are prepared. Yinsen's hands reach for one of the dead bodies at the door, and Peter tries to look away, but can’t quite bring himself to do so. Watching from the edge of his vision. Waiting for blood to spill over the cave floors.

Then Yinsen disappears further into the tunnels, and Peter is a sitting duck waiting for his program to upload. The sounds of bullets and bombs give him a headache. The reactor in his chest starts to heat up uncomfortably.

They’ve only got this one chance.

They can’t waste it…

Finally, the computer finishes and Peter moves. Barely realizes that he’s moving before the mask slides over his eyes, and he’s moving through the caves. People are running around him, screaming in a language he doesn’t understand, but only Peter can focus on counting.

Forty-one steps straight ahead.

The metal is thick and heavy, but some people don’t have the brain power to understand what that means. The sound of metal against metal echoes through the armor, Peter’s ears ringing, and a man falls to his knees, bleeding from his shoulder. Shock coloring his face.

Sixteen steps, right?

He swings his metal arms, feeling the resistance as people around him collapse. Something cracks before hitting the cave floor, but Peter can’t see it. He thinks maybe that’s for the better. He can smell it, the death that hangs in the air… but he pushes past it. Through it. Swings and swings and swings, attacking everyone entering his path.

Peter has no other choice…

Thirty-three, turn right again.

He sees Yinsen then. The man leans against the cave walls, blood running down his chest and head. Down over his eyes and nose. His eyes are glazed and hollow. The kindness he’d shown towards Peter as if he was his child, had gone in a fit of rage and anger.

Don’t look back… don’t look back… don’t look back.

Peter marches on. Seventeen steps… then… the light at the end of the tunnel. He hasn’t seen this since the day he accepted the challenge of making the missile. Since the day he first thought of the light, that now lives in his chest.

He moves towards it as quickly as the suit allows. Yinsen’s voice echoes in his brain, but he can’t turn around now. He won’t have power enough; he won’t be able to escape…

They’re waiting outside. More weapons than Peter has ever seen in one place pointed at him. He doesn’t feel scared and doesn’t register the danger that he’s in. Wondered instead, if this was how Ben felt pushing Peter behind them, stepping up to a criminal, and threatening to kill a little girl. Heart pounding in his chest. The fear of what could happen to those around him was stronger than the fear of what could happen to himself.

If Peter doesn’t win now, MJ and May will be broken. He’ll be dead… for real…

He pictures their faces as he pulls the cylinder in his right arm open, and watches as the flame catches the gas and fire fills the air before him. Washing away the people and the sound of life. Pictures their sorrow if he dies, pictures their smiles when he does come home.

And then he’s flying. High about the desert. The mountains disappear, and he’s weightless. The arc reactor pumps in his chest, allowing adrenaline to fill his body.

It worked… it worked. It worked!

Then he’s crashing. Crashing towards the ground, but it’s better than a cave. The sun sets on the horizon as he lands. The sand takes some of the impact from his body and acts almost like a soft pillow. It seeps in through his clothes. Lucky for him, the armor breaks up like an egg, just like they’d planned.

For a while, Peter just lies there trying to remember everything that led to this moment. Tries to make his head stop spinning. But as the sun sets, the temperature drops and it’s too cold to stay down. He forces himself up on his feet, wraps his clothing as tightly around him as he can, and walks. Away from the mountains. Away from the caves.

They hadn’t had a clue where the closest city or military base was, so Peter walked. Hoping someone will find him before his blood turns into ice cubes.

He hadn’t just flown away in a metal death trap, just to die from the desert cold.

A million stars glittered down at him, his breath making frozen clouds before him. He’s shivering. It reminds him of the shrapnel that still lives in his chest, the shrapnel that could dig into his lungs and heart… that would have, if not for the arc reactor.

It hits hit then. Hits him, that he’d succeed. His project was working! He’d have to show Otto that he was right, he’d have to show Mr. Stark that he was wrong.

He’d… he’d live… as soon as he got out of the cold.

Above him, the skin fills with helicopters, lights sweeping over the sand. He raises his hands and feels his legs growing heavy beneath him. He hopes they’ll see him. That they are anyone, but the ten rings. “Please…” his voice comes out hollow are first, then louder, “Please. I’m here. I need help!” the lights are blinding as they focus on him. He lets himself fall to his knees.

He’s safe now. He’s going home. MJ… May…

The first man out of the helicopter looks are him for a long moment before he runs to him. Peter recognizes the man immediately. General Rhodes. The man reaches him. “Peter, are you okay? Your… you must be freezing” he says pulling his jacket off and wrapping it around Peter’s shoulders.

Peter can’t find his words. Leans into the warmth of Rhodes's touch, despite him being a stranger. “Woaw, Kid?” Rhodes sounds scary. Worried. His voice grows louder as Peter’s eyes slide close. They’re just too heavy to stay open anymore. His whole body is too heavy. It just… the tiredness washes over him so suddenly. “We need medical down here! He’s hypothermic.”

Is he? He doesn’t feel cold… he feels safe. So, so, safe…

Notes:

Note that Peter hasn't added a single weapon to the suit, or made a single one. The fire blaster is purely to distract them. The bomb is all Yinsen.

Chapter 5: Honesty

Summary:

“How are you feeling Mr. Parker?”

“Can you tell us about the attack? What happened over there?”

“Look over here!”

“Tell us, how did you escape?”

You never truly know what you’ve got until it’s pulled away from you. Taken, destroyed, broken.

Reality was, that Peter had been stuck in a cave for three months and six days. Three months and six days, where he hadn’t known if he’d ever make it out. Where his life had been hanging from a treat, ready to break at any moment. Any second. He could have closed his eyes and died. Months of uncertainty of what would be waiting for him on the other side.

Was May still alive? Was MJ still a student? How had Peter being gone, missing for so long, affected them? The people who mattered the most to him.

He’d been scared, sitting in that damned planed with General Rhodes by his side. Waiting to go back home. Waiting to go back to school. Seeing his family again, sleeping in his bed. He just wanted everything to go back to normal, or, as normal as things ever could after three months and six days in a cave, with an arc reactor that shouldn’t work, sitting in his chest.

It all washes away when May’s arms close around him. Tightening her grasp on him, as if scared he’d disappear again if she let go. Her soft scent hadn’t changed, her way of rubbing his shoulders on a bad day hadn’t changed, her voice and her being and her life hadn’t changed. “You’re home” She keeps telling him, whispering into his ear, “You’re home. You’re alive.”

“I am” Peter whispered back. And then May let’s go, and Michelle takes her place. Her frame fit perfectly in Peter’s arms, their lips sliding together like they’d always done, her soft curls brushing against Peter’s cheeks. “I’m sorry for scaring you.”

Michelle looks at him and shakes her head, a few stray tears slipping down her dark cheeks and Peter reaches out to brush them away. “Don’t do that, it’s not your fault, don’t take the blame for it.”

Peter could stay right there for the rest of his life, on the runway of a military airport just outside of New York, together with Michelle and May. He doesn’t mind it one bit, because all he needs is for them, to feel at home. As if they warmed his body, sucking away the pain and cold he’d felt in those caves. Removing all the months they hadn’t been together in a single heartbeat. Because Peter felt safe, felt good. For a moment he didn’t think about the solider Jason who never made it back to the car, to Peter. He doesn’t think about Yinsen and destiny and death.

They can’t stay there of course. May takes him by his hand, and Michelle glues herself to his side. “We’re going to the hospital, I don’t want to discuss it. We need to make sure you’re in one piece.” Peter just nods, allowing his aunt to take over. Allows himself to be a kid again, after an Asthma attack, someone else making the decisions for him.

“I’m afraid that will have to wait” A deep voice calls out. Peter doesn’t waste a second finding its source. Mr. Tony Stark was standing in front of the most expensive car Peter had ever seen. Pepper Potts, his assistant, is by his right side, and Happy Hogan his security guard by his left. With sunglasses and a perfect suit, he doesn’t look different from that day of the weapons demonstration.

It’s almost as if Peter was looking back in time, to a time when none of this had ever happened. For a second, he reaches for his chest, feels the vibrations of the reactor under his shirt, and knows that all those months had been real. Knows that this is nothing but an illusion.

“Excuse me?” May sounds frustrated, as if she’d had this conversation many times already.

Tony Stark steps closer, a brown paper bag in his hands. He opens it, throwing a wrapped burger into Peter’s hands, before offering Michelle one too. “I brought cheeseburgers” he comments, “I hope you don’t mind.” There’s a wide, crazy grin across his face. “Eat up, you look like shit, Kid.”

“We’ve already told you no press, no conferences. None of that.” May sounds almost angry, her grasp on his hand growing stronger.

May had lost Ben too, Peter sometimes forgot about that, because May was the strongest, coolest, smartest, most amazing woman Peter knew. She was ready to do anything and everything to keep the people in her life safe. She was a Parker in everything but blood. Had that right attitude, compassion, and strength. It shouldn’t surprise him that she was trying to protect him now, too. Keeping a strong wall, when Peter’s own was cracking, at the edge of crumbling to the ground.

Stark doesn’t appear to take notice of May’s words though, as he hands the bag to Mrs. Potts. “I’d like to personally apologize for putting you in harm's way. What happened that day was tragic, and shouldn’t have been possible.” It feels trained as he says it, like a script someone else wrote. Peter just nods slowly anyway.

“With that out of the way,” Stark’s voice changes from trained to the typical press tone. Peter had seen him enough on TV and online to know. “Gotta show the world I didn't get a kid killed.” Mr. Hogan slides into the car, the engine loud to Peter’s tired head.

“You will not be kidnapping my nephew so that you can repair your reputation” May steps between them now, but Peter doesn’t hear most of the conversation. It had been three months and six days, and no one had he considered how the world reacted to any of it. How would they react if he told them about the cave, about the attack, about them carrying around Stark weapons?

Peter is twenty-one. He could be a soldier if he’d wanted to… like Flash… those weapons, they were supposed to protect. But instead, they’d caused the whole issue to begin with.

“It’s okay, May” Peter reach out to her, “It’s fine. I don’t mind, I promise.”

May looks shocked, but a moment later her face softens. She pulls him into another hug, just as tight as the first one. “Of course, it’s fine, honey. It’s all fine. Me and Michelle will be joining you in just a moment, okay? We’ll be right there if you change your mind.” Peter hums in acknowledgment before following Mr. Stark to his car. Potts takes the front seat, with Peter and Stark in the back.

They’re barely out of the airport area before Stark pulls out more food.

 

***

 

Mr. Hogen holds the door open for them as they leave the car. Stark lays an arm over Peter’s shoulders, forcing himself awkwardly into Peter’s private space. But he doesn’t comment on it, letting the older man guide him through the heavy crowds of reporters and cameras. Bright flashes blinded him, loud voices echoing in his ears.

“How are you feeling Mr. Parker?”

“Can you tell us about the attack? What happened over there?”

“Look over here!”

“Tell us, how did you escape?”

Stark knows exactly how to manage it, pushing them both forward. Flashing bright smiles at every camera, Peter feels himself becoming smaller and smaller in his t-shirt and jeans. But he doesn’t regret his decision for even a second as they finally make it through the doors and into the conference room. A raised stage holds a podium, large windows allow natural light to flow in, and people are standing in a giant ocean of humans, big and small and tall and tiny.

Tony Stark guides them both to the front, from where Peter can see every face, every camera, every microphone, every notepad. And in return, all of them can see him, too.

In the back of the crowd, Michelle and May have already found their spot, talking to a bold man with a stern expression on his face. Not a reporter like the others, no, this man looked more like security of some sort. FBI or CIA, maybe.

Peter feels weird standing on the stage alone with Stark, so after a long moment of people cheering and talking, Peter sits down on the raised platform, legs over the edge. Stark looks at him confused but quickly waves everyone down onto the ground so that they aren’t rising above them. Then joins Peter.

Mr. Hogan, Mrs. Potts, and General Rhodes find their spot together with Michelle and May, just as the doors close.

Let the press conference begin.

The truth was, that Peter didn’t know what he wanted to say. He had questions and concerns about what had happened, thoughts, and feelings about it. Blood pictures and painful nightmares, playing on a loop, like a video only he could see.

“So, as you can all see Mr. Parker has returned in one piece,” Stark begins, going on a tangent about how good it is to see Peter back, and that he couldn’t wait to see what there would become of the project that Stark Industries was still going to be funding through the September foundation. When Stark is finished after a moment, Peter watches over the crowd.

They’re all waiting for him.

He nods to one of the closet reporters. An older man who fidgets with his notepad, a finger halfway into the air. The man sends him a soft smile before he asks, “If you feel comfortable talking about it, Peter, what happened over there?” Friendly, but direct.

Peter swallows the knot in his throat. Here goes nothing. “We were attacked on our way back to base. Something exploded in front of the car, and, before we knew it there were people everywhere shooting at us. Throwing bombs, and…” Peter shakes his head, trying to clear his thoughts. “I was told to stay in the car, but a bomb blew one of the sides into a million pieces, and I was forced to flee the vehicle.”

He looks out over the crowd. They’re quiet now, giving Peter his time to speak. Time to find his words.

“But it was already too late. A bomb, a Stark Industries bomb, landed next to me and blew up.” Peter pulls the tiny jar of shrapnel out of his pocket; he didn’t remember bringing it from the cave before it had fallen out back at the military base. He holds it up into the light and twists it to show the specks of metal. “My chest was filled with small pieces of shrapnel. But another person who’d been captured saved my life. Dug out as much as he could from my chest.”

A hesitant finger rises in the crowd when Peter goes quiet. “How did that feel? What did that make you think?”

Peter stands up, taking the podium. Steadies himself. “I saw… I saw kids, young men my age, killed by weapons that were supposed to protect them. I could have been one of them. A friend of mine could have been one of them, Flash. When my uncle was killed a few years ago, I always wanted to ask the man who shot him, if he thought it had helped anything. If it had been worth it, bringing that gun out into the world. Because Ben always said that weapons don’t solve problems, they only create more.”

Stark stands then too, studying him. Watching him.

“He also said that we have a responsibility to do what is right because we can.” Peter looks at Stark and then, meets his eyes. He’s no longer talking to the crowd; he’s talking directly to the man. “While I was in that cave, fearing for my life, I often asked myself; Is Tony Stark using his abilities to do the right thing, or is he a part of the problem? Doesn’t he have more to offer the world than simply blowing things up and creating mass murder?”

“Are you suggesting that Tony Stark is somehow responsible for the attack?” a report stands up, a deep frown on her face.

“Not directly” Peter shakes his head, “What I am saying, is that he created the tools to make the attack possible in the first.”

He looks to Michelle and to May, who hovers in the back of the crowd. Watches the pride in May’s eyes and watches the soft smile on Michelle’s lips. Watches as Rhodes and Hogan and Potts scan the crowd, look for signs of danger, look for an opening to end it.

They don’t need to. Stark carefully pushes Peter out of the way, a pressed smile on his face. “I think what we should take away from this, is that Peter Parker is safe. He is back home with friends and family. In a safe environment, where he can start recovery after what must have been a traumatic experience for him.”

Peter rushes through the crowds, allowing May to take his weight as he reaches them. Tries not to focus on the people watching him like hawks. He wouldn’t take any of it back. He meant it, every word. He just wanted Tony to think about the direction of his company.

He’d claimed the arc reactor was a proof of concept. A PR student, shut up the people who didn’t believe them. That it was ineffective. But Peter had proved otherwise, knew from firsthand experience what an arc reactor could truly do.

“Mr. Parker” the security man nods in greeting before pulling out a batch. “I’m agent Phil Coulson with the Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics division. I’m sure you’d like to be with your family for a while, but we need to debrief you about the circumstances of your escape.”

Notes:

We hit 100 fics today, so we're dual posting to celebrate!

Chapter 6: Guilt

Summary:

Peter feels the reactor in his chest send a small spark through his body. The burned taste of palladium lingers in the back of Peter’s mouth, and he grasps around the table, a wave of dizziness coming over him.

After the press conference and giving his phone number to Agent Phil Coulson, May, Michelle, and Peter had gone to the hospital, where he’d revealed more about the shrapnel in his chest to the people closest to him. Including the arc reactor that seeped into his chest, with a soft blue glow.

The sight of his chest, covered by scars, had caused instant chock from both his family and the doctors. Peter had three months to adjust to his new life, with an electromagnet in his chest, but they hadn’t. To them, it was nothing more than experimental technology, that could kill him, or save him, and nobody knew how to use it. Well, nobody but Peter himself… and the man who lay dead in a cave somewhere millions of miles away.

Doctors poked and prodded him for hours, inserting different tubes and IVs for fluid and nutrition. Around his one wrist they’d wrapped a name tag, Peter Parker – 21, was written in big blocky letters.

Over the days that followed, a few things happened.

Firstly, the doctors did daily scans of his chest. A combination of x-rays and MRIs, trying to get a better picture of where the shrapnel was, if it was possible to remove it safely, and if so, if the arc reactor could be removed too. After all, Peter wasn’t stuck in a cave anymore, he had a medical team with a lot more tolls and a lot more experience than Yinsen had.

As it turned out, the shrapnel was closer to his heart than they’d originally expected. The electromagnet was doing its job, but it wasn’t possible to remove the shrapnel. Not yet at least.

(“We just don’t have the technology to work on such a small scale, Mr. Parker.”

“Why are you sounding so angry?” Peter looks between the doctor and May, “He’s sounding angry right?” May nods.

“You’re just very lucky to be alive young man.”)

Secondly, Peter was visited by a therapist of sorts. He asked questions about how he felt, what he remembered from the cave, how he was sleeping, and if he’d ever experienced signs of depression or anxiety. Telling him that it was okay if he didn’t feel right at the moment, and that anyone would understand if he needed time to readjust. That there were options if he needed help with school or extensions. That there were meds they could try if he was struggling, all he had to do was talk about it and they’d fix the rest.

PTSD was a big concern all things considered. Especially after everything that he’d been through. His parents dying, watching Ben get shot, and now this.

One person could only take say much, they told him, that sooner or later it was all going to come crashing down around him. They wanted to be there for him and make sure he got the support he needed before it happened.

(“I’m sure this must all be very confusing for you, Peter. But I can assure you-“

Peter tilts his head at the therapist with a sigh, “Look, I think it’s a lot less confusing for me than it is for you. Considering I was there, and you have no idea what happened in that cave.”

“I’d like to understand, Peter, you just need to be honest we me and your medical team.”

“I think I’ll stick with my family for now. Thanks.”)

Truth was the therapist probably hadn’t been wrong about Peter needing to talk to someone and needed to rethink his plans.

Not because of the arc reactor in his chest. That was an issue all on its own.

He’d had trouble sleeping long before he was attached, though. Even on the battlefield, that hadn’t scared him. He’d just kept seeing Ben. Ben and blood and screams and bullets echoing in his ears. He was fucked, but he’d been fucked for a long time, and he wasn’t ready to explain that to a therapist that thought Peter's biggest issue was being held captive for three months.

Was it weird? Sure.

Had it been crazy to see social media speculating that Peter was dead? Yes sir.

But it didn’t matter in the end. Peter was still Peter, May was still May, and Michelle was still Michelle (Call me MJ). He still had an apartment with the love of his life, just a mile from their college. He was still a student at ESU, even if he might need to redo some of the stuff that he’d missed. And most importantly, he was still alive. Everything else didn’t matter.

Or maybe it did, and Peter just hadn’t realized it yet. Because he still heard Yinsen’s words echoing through his head.

“You were never supposed to be here Peter, you've been removed from your path. Your destiny. You must find your way back to it. Because the person you were almost meant to become.”

And thirdly, maybe the craziest of all things, Stark Industries went viral. Or, more especially, Peter’s press conference went viral.

He and Michelle had been watching TV one afternoon, nurses running around in the hallways, when suddenly Peter’s voice echoed through the speakers of the tiny TV. “What I am saying, is that he created the tools to make the attack possible in the first.” And sure enough, there were pictures of Peter standing before the podium. His hair and messy and his t-shirt was big around his frame. A group of experts in science were talking about what he’d said that day. About his claims of shrapnel, bombs guilt, and responsibility.

It appeared that Peter wasn’t the only one who had an issue with Tony Stark’s way of doing things.

There were plenty of videos and social media posts talking about how son husband and father had been killed in that very same area where Peter had been attacked. Claims of Stark weapons severely injuring the people they had been created to protect.

Now it was all being looked at in detail, and Stark Industries appeared to be in deep trouble. Because Peter’s words hadn’t just gone viral, they’d caused a chain reaction.

“They called in for a board of directors meeting,” Michelle tells him, reading from her phone. “The board is claiming that Stark is the reason those weapons were in the wrong hands, they want to file an injunction. Lock him out of the company completely.”

“Can they even do that?” Peter asks, leaning back in the soft hospital bed trying to picture the discussion that might be happening, “Who’d run the company if they did that?”

Michelle shrugs, dropping her phone onto the bed beside him. “Obadiah Stane.”

“I screwed up, didn’t I?”

Michelle shakes her head and smiles at him softly. Her hands grasp his, their fingers fitting together perfectly. “You said the right thing, Pete. The world needs to know what’s happening, so you told them. It’s not your fault that the stocks dipped forty points.”

“Forty points?” Peter looks at her in shock. That was a lot in less than four days. “So much for getting the guy to think his life through.”

“The injunction probably won’t go through,” Michelle comments, “Stark owns the controlling interest in the company, so it’s going to be hard-throwing him out. Essentially since Stane left the company three years ago to live in some holiday resort in Hawaii.”

“Did he almost blow himself up?” Peter asks with a deep frown. He’d read something about that. Hadn’t he?

Michelle shrugs and leans over him. Her grasp on his hand tightens. “Does it matter? You’re getting funding for your project, Stark Industries has to make new safety protocols, maybe even drop the weapons for a while. It’s a win-win. Isn’t it? You’re home. That’s a win, right?”

Peter nods slowly, leaning forward to rest his lips against Michelle’s cheekbone, and a moment later she returns it. Her soft lips met Peter’s chapped lips.

“Oh right, Otto that teacher of yours called,” Michelle tells him when they move apart. “He said he wanted to talk to you before you start class again. He sounded pretty concerned about you, and said he wanted to make sure you were ready to go back to the lab.”

“Yeah?” Peter sneaks another kiss, feeling his cheeks blush, “I’ll call him back.”

 

***

 

Otto was one of the best teachers Peter had ever met. He always seems engaged in every student project, truly proud of his kids when they accomplish something new. Something life-changing. It had been he who suggested Peter participate in the competition that had changed his life, and nobody could have predicted what would happen next.

When Peter calls Otto and they plan to meet, he first expects it to be at the school. But Otto had instead invited Peter to Otto’s lab.

Otto was a scientist first and, a teacher second.

Peter knew very little about the type of work his professor did but did however know that Otto had worked with Oscorp and that part of his project funding came through Oscorp. Even if Otto didn’t work in the building anymore, together with Norman Osborn.

So yeah, Peter knew next to nothing, though that was apparently about to change.

Showing up at the address that Peter had been given, he hadn’t thought laboratory at first glance. More like a warehouse. It wasn’t perfect, and the building looks worse for wear, but it seems big and spacy too. Otto meets him at the front door, pulling him into yet another tight hug before holding Peter at shoulder length studying him. Scanning him for injuries. Finding non.

“Oh Peter, come in, come in.” Otto ushered him through the doors that clocked with a mechanical click behind them. “Sorry it’s a little messy, I’ve been trying to keep order on things, but you know how science is.”

Peter follows him inside of what is the main lab. Workstations separated by large metal shelves, carrying chemicals in different colors, and tools that Peter hadn’t ever seen before in his life. But one workstation stood out as the one Otto had been working with when Peter came.

It was messier than the others, with yellow tennis balls lying across the ground. A control device lying half-finished, next to what Peter could only describe as an arm. Not a human arm of bone and flesh of course, not this had to be a type of advanced prosthetic. Made to replace limbs.

Otto catches on to Peter’s discovery quickly, “It’s incredible, isn’t it?” he asks, pulling the control device out and handing it to Peter, “Go on, give it a try.”

Peter hesitates for a moment before he takes the controller and tries the arm. It’s incredibly responsive, but somehow there’s an input lag that makes it full chubby and hard to control.

“This is your project?” Peter asks, handing the controller back and leaning in closer to get a better look at the 3D-printed carbon fiber that is made of the shell of the arm. One of the panels where open, and when Peter looked inside, he could see four or five different motors that allowed it to move the way it did, like a real arm.

“Fascinating, isn’t it?” Otto smiles at Peter’s curiosity. “You like it?”

Peter nods. He more than liked it, he loved it. This was something different. There were so many people working on weapons and clean energy, on planes and robots. But he’d never seen anyone with a soul focus on replacing a limb in quite this way. A prosthetic that could interact with the nervous system like nothing anyone had ever seen before. Peter had no doubt Otto was one of the smartest people on the planet, and his work here proved it.

He realized then that Otto hadn’t just created this, he’d done it alone. A solo act.

There was just one problem with it… “It must take up an enormous amount of energy to function. Right? That’s why it’s lagging, it isn’t getting the power that it needs to do its job.”

“I always knew you were smart, Peter” Otto nods, “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. If you will.” Otto waves him along into a smaller office, connected to the main lab area. Otto takes a seat in the chair at the desk, pushing a second chair in Peter’s direction.

On the screen, Otto pulls up Peter’s arc reactor project. The work that he’d done for the competition. Otto had been a big help in getting as far as he had. “I’ve been attempting to work on your idea while you were gone, I hope you don’t mind,” Otto says, a hesitant look on his face. Peter just shakes his head with a grin. He didn’t mind at all, and a second later Otto pulled up a 3D model of the prosthetic connected to a mini reactor.

For a long moment, Peter takes his time to study it. Otto hadn’t managed to get it working, but his idea did make sense. If it needed those levels of power, the prosthetic still had a long way to go before anyone could use it in their day-to-day life. They’d have to be connected to the grid at all times, and even then, results would vary.

With an arc reactor directly connected to the arm, that wouldn’t be an issue. The power output would be able to run the arm anywhere in the world. It wouldn’t even need a battery.

Self-sustaining energy just got a whole lot cooler.

“Of course, it’s only a hypothetical right now. But I believe that with our work combined in due time, we could heal the world. Not just replaced lost limbs but improve them.” Otto smiles kindly, as the PC screen goes to sleep. “I wanted to ask you before you left if you were interested in becoming my intern. I’d pay you of course. However, I didn’t want to add any more stress to you.”

He couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing. He knew Otto was known for doing great work, stuff that Peter felt invested in, even if he’d only just discovered what the man did. But he’d never imagined an offer like this. Interning for Otto?

In some weird way the suit that had saved Peter’s life, had been a prosthetic too. The design was oddly similar. The skeleton that had allowed Peter to control it had been built up similarly to what Otto was presenting for his arm. The arc reactor wouldn’t have any trouble powering it, and Peter could prove it.

He grins at Otto, before getting to his feet and moving back towards the lab. Otto is hot on his heels.

He disconnects the arms from the gride, it’s current Power Source. Watching as the lights in it flicker off, and it becomes limp in its stand. Hand resting on the cold metal table.

Pulling his t-shirt over his head, exposing his upper body, and by extension the arc reactor he heard Otto take in a deep, stiff breath. Shock colored his face. “Is that-“

Peter nods, “I created it while I was in the cave. It currently runs on a palladium core, which…” Peter bit his lips, “Isn’t ideal, but I didn’t have much to work with.” Cause, it was poisoning him. Slowly. Palladium wasn’t made to keep the human heart running and taking residence in the human chest cavity. But he hadn’t had a lot of options to work with.

“It works?” Otto looks puzzled. The roles are switched.

“Yeah,” Peter confirms.

His professor moves in close, fingers running across the arc reactor. Peter can almost feel it as if there wasn’t a massive hole in his chest. But skin and flesh. “This is a breakthrough, I thought, I was sure you’d need more time to make it work, I-“

Peter shrugs, plugging the arm into the arc reactor in the same way he’d done with the suit in the damn dark, cold, cave. A moment later the arm runs through its start-up sequence. Testing every joint, every motor. Does a few circles, and stretches out each finger. The lights changed from red to yellow, and then to green.

“Try it now.” Peter offers and Otto quickly connects the controller and moves the arm. Up, down, left, right. It’s much smoother this time around.

When Otto tries to have the arm pick up and throw one of the balls, however, Peter feels the reactor in his chest send a small spark through his body. The burned taste of palladium lingers in the back of Peter’s mouth, and he grasps around the table, a wave of dizziness coming over him.

Otto stops what he's doing in mere seconds, giving Peter a steady hand. Peter shakes his head, brushing Otto’s concern off. “Like I said, palladium core is not ideal. And this one wasn’t designed to run anything too demanding. Not for long at least.”

“You don’t seem worried about that?” Otto asks, wonder in his voice as Peter quickly recovers.

Peter shrugs, “I’ve got ideas for a fix. I’ll need a tiny bit of Vibranium, which” He smiles, “The September foundation has already approved off.” He’d spend his many hours in the hospital well. He’d already drawn up a new and improved reactor now that he knew how to make the original one work. All thanks to Michelle who’d snuck him in a notebook and pencil case.

He had no doubt it would be just what Otto needed. What they needed.

What Peter needed.

He’d seen a lot of death in his life. Had seen some nasty stuff pretty recently. So, yeah, maybe the therapist was right. Maybe Peter was messed up because of everything that happened. Because a tiny flicker of guilt was growing in him, for every moment he’d been back home.

He needed to find a way to make the world safer for everyone. To pay back to the people who gave their lives to protect Peter’s.

“Does that mean…” Otto meets Peter’s eyes. They’re glowing like a child at Christmas. A large smile growing and growing and growing on his face. “Does that mean you accept my offer?”

Giving soldiers new limbs, sounded like something that could fix his guilt.

Peter looks between the arm, and then down his chest. Watching the reactor fade in and out. He nods. “It would be an honor to be your intern.”

No. Screw the guilt. Peter didn’t feel guilty… he felt responsible. Wasn’t that what Ben had told him? Wasn’t that the core of everything?

Chapter 7: Dreams

Summary:

Peter gasps for air as the real world appears before him.

It’s dark. Only the light of his chest reflects in the windows.

“Pete?” Michelle sounds tired beside him, looks up at him, “Did you have a nightmare again?”

The arc reactor hums in his chest. Vibrates through his body. Air reaches his lungs slowly, his heart beats in a steady rhythm. Light… He’d seen the light. He’d been about to die…

As it turns out, Peter was far from the only one feeling responsible for what happened that day.

Before he makes it out of the subway and into his and Michelle’s apartment after visiting Otto’s lab his phone rings. The screen lights up with an Unknown number.

Peter looks at it for half a second before swiping left and pressing the phone against his ear, letting himself slump down onto one of the benches before his apartment building.

“Am I speaking with Peter Parker?” A voice Peter doesn’t recognize asks.

“Uh, yeah. That’s me.”

There’s a sigh of relief over the phone. “I am Tony Stark's assistant. I’m calling on behalf of Tony, who would like to invite you to his lab this weekend.”

“Who is this?” Peter asks after a moment, because doesn’t he know that voice?

“Pepper Potts, sir. We meet the other day.”

It clicks then. Peter feels like an idiot, feeling himself blush, happy that Mrs. Potts can’t see that. “Oh, of course, Mrs. Potts. Sorry, my mind was somewhere else.”

“That’s alright.” She doesn’t sound angry at all. “Where were we? Right. Mr. Stark would like to have you come by his lab this weekend. If you’ve got time, of course. We understand that things right now might be, chaotic. It’s understandable if you need time to settle.”

Peter can’t help but snort out a short laugh, “You sound almost like my therapist.”

Mrs. Potts gives a short chuckle too. Unsure how to respond to Peter’s comment.

“Uh, why does he want me at his lab?”

“Mr. Stark feels extremely bad about the way he treated you the day of the press conference. He’d like to apologize more formally, and if you’d like, he’d love to hear more about your project.”

Peter sucks in a breath, remembering Tony’s comment that day. “The one from the competition?”

Mrs. Potts hums in response, “That would be my assumption.”

“Okay, I guess. Uhm. Were and when are we meeting exactly?”

“We’ll have our driver Mr. Hogan pick you up at your apartment. He’ll text you when he’s there.” Peter doesn’t even get time to respond before the line goes dead. He sits for a long moment with the phone in his hand. Seeing his reflection in the perfect, new glass, that wouldn’t be late for more than a week or two. Because of course, his old phone was gone. Destroyed. Lost photos text messages, and apps he’d have to reinstall but hadn’t gotten around to yet. Because he hadn’t gotten around to doing a lot of anything yet.

He’d spend close to a week in the hospital and then he’d spend another week – until today – in his bed. His body feels too heavy to move from under the blankets. His brain to tired after weird dreams of blood against a cave wall, pain in his chest, and Yinsen telling him to breathe.

Yinsen’s death. Jason’s death. The cave surgery that saved Peter’s life, that he didn’t realize he remembered, until now. Until now he was home, and the pictures wouldn’t stop playing.

Peter pushes himself back up from the bench and walks home. Trying not to think.

 

***

 

The weekend rolls around faster than he expects it to.

Suddenly he’s been home for three weeks, and still done little to nothing with his life but sleep and eat. Well, he’d been looking over some of the stuff he’d missed at ESU. Stuff that he understood despite never having been to his lectures.

Not because he was that overly, epic, smart. But because Yinsen had taught him some of this stuff in a dark cave while building a suit of metal.

The morning of the meeting Peter had spent together with Michelle, trying to figure out what to wear. Tony Stark was fancy, and while Peter doubted he’d push more press on Peter, he also knew that the press was always around Tony Stark. That was probably why they were meeting in Tony’s private lab instead of an office somewhere. So after trying on an old suit that he hadn’t worn for over a year, and then trying on one of Ben’s suits because the first one didn’t fit, Peter had decided to just show up like the mess that he was.

Well… a mess in a blazer and a red t-shirt underneath. And the new, good vans that and jeans that May had gotten him for his birthday last year, which he hadn’t worn yet.

True to Mrs. Pepper's words, a text popped up from yet another unknown number: I’m here. Come down when you’re ready. Ten minutes later, Peter was once more sitting in the car with those fancy leather seats, together with the driver everyone called Happy, only he didn’t look happy.

What in the world has his life become?

It’s lucky for Peter that the drive isn’t too long.

Twenty minutes after he steps into the car, it drives down into Stark Tower's private parking space. Happy steps out to open the door for him, and Peter easily slides out.

Happy points to the elevator before throwing Peter an ID card, “Floor 101. Someone will be waiting for you.”

“Sure, thanks.” Happy and the car is gone in an instant.

Peter enters the elevator, scanning his new ID card, and doesn’t even need to click anything. The elevator starts moving the second the light turns green, confirming his identity.

It moved much quicker than Peter had expected it to. After just a few seconds he’s on the top

floor. The doors opened before him.

“Mr. Parker.” Mrs. Potts greets as Peter steps out.

“Just, Peter. Please. I, it’s getting a bit too formal.” Peter cringes. He’s always hated people who were being overly formal for the sake of being overly formal. They were behind closed doors right now, so it was just Peter. Heck, the kind, old journalist at the press conference had called him Peter.

She nods, “Alright Peter. In that case, you can just call me Pepper.” She smiles and nodes down the corridor, “It’s just this way.”

They walk down a small hallway, before coming to a big door that slides open before them. Pepper nods for Peter to enter first, and so he does. Stepping into Tony Stark’s private laboratory.

There is loud music blaring from the speakers, AC/DC if Peter had to guess. It wasn’t his type of music, but it wasn’t bad either. The lab was big, much bigger than Peter had pictured it, knowing that Stark had a workshop at his home in Malibu. There were pictures of it in some article written about him a couple of months prior, talking about his extensive collection of cars and art. Most of which was stored in that very workshop.

One wall was completely covered by windows, the sun streaming in softly, probably through some sort of filter, because when Peter looked out it wasn’t blinding at all. And the natural light did blend well with the artificial light further into the lab.

In one corner a car was suspended in the air so that it was easy to work on from below. In another, there where a large 3D printer, that could most likely print full-sized humans if you wanted to.

There where a soldering station, and a wall filled with every tool Peter could name. There where a computer hanging on the wall, connected to a screen, only the computer wasn’t a cabinet, each part was mounted to a black wooden board. And in the air, everywhere Peter looked, blue holograms glowed. Rotating, allowing him to see every detail of each project.

At one of these holograms stood Tony, concentrated on his work modeling something that Peter couldn’t quite explain what was.

It wasn’t a weapon; he knew that much. But it wasn’t a type of tech he’d ever seen before.

Pepper clears her throat and the music cuts out suddenly. Tony looks surprised as he turns around but relaxes visibly when he spots Peter at Pepper’s side. He gives a genuine smile in his direction, different from the one he’d gotten when he just returned.

A bot comes rolling out from a storage area, beeping happy sounds. As if greeting Peter.

“Mr. Parker” Tony steps closer and gives him a tight handshake. “Can I call you Peter?” Peter nods, “Good, and you can call me Tony.”

Peter is pulled along deeper into the lab, and Pepper disappears.

He’s surrounded by the holograms. Watching them move before him. “Uh, thanks for inviting me, Tony?”

Tony shrugs it off with a smile. “Look kid, I realized I went about it the wrong way back at the base. I…” he hesitates. Rubs the back of his neck with an embarrassed reaction on his face. Just a flicker of a second of humanity. “I wasn’t all that nice to you when you won the competition. I don’t know how to do, kids.”

“Young adult.” Peter corrects.

“Young adult,” Tony echoes him and meets his brown eyes, “I read about your project in more detail, before we knew if…” he shakes his head, “It’s a good idea. Self-sustaining energy. I’m just not sure if it could work. I mean, the source of power, it’s core-“

“Would have to be something palladium or Vibranium.” Peter finishes.

Tony looks at him slightly shocked and nods after a moment. “Of course, you already knew that you even requested Vibranium from the September Foundation.” Peter just shrugs.

There’s another moment of silence between them before Tony speaks again.

“Look… as a proper apology I’d like to offer you a job, or internship here at Stark Industries. You wrote in your report that you wanted the arc reactor to help create a better world, I want that too, if you’re willing to work with me.”

Peter feels his heart skip a beat. The machine in his chest sparks.

The bot appears shocked at the sparks, rolling backward into the tool wall. A hammer comes crashing down, leaving a dent in the bot's metal casing.

“Dum-E!” Tony sounds almost angry, but not quiet. There’s a slight laugh in his voice. Then the spark registers in Tony’s brain and he looks at Peter, a little worried maybe. “Uh… are you, alright there Pete?”

Peter nods, but does take one of the nearby chairs and sits down.

He needed to fix that new version of the reactor. The palladium was slowly seeping into his body, and with Peter’s already weakened state and lifelong health issues – too many months in ERs for asthma attacks and Pneumonia - he wouldn’t last long without a Vibranium core.

Tony comes closer, clearly taking in the sight of Peter trying to take in a normal breath, trying to get his heart to beat right again.

“It’s just…” Peter shakes his head and pulls his shirt down a little instead of speaking. Let the blue light seep out. Because he might as well tell Tony that he was wrong, or… right. “Just… need that Vibranium. Soon.”

Tony pulls the shirt further down. Pulls at the hem, brushing Peter’s hand away. “You made this?”

Peter nods.

“When?”

“Uh…” Peter swallows, hoping Tony will figure it out on his own.

“The cave, of course,” Tony looks so bright, “I, of course. The Vibranium is on its way from Wakanda, here within the week I. Think about the offer though. With this… you really could change the world.”

 

***

 

“So…” Michelle sits down on the bed next to Peter. He’s been scribbling notes and drawings in the notebook Michelle had gotten for him, trying to clear his head after Tony’s. offer. “Are you going to do it? Say yes, I mean. See where Stark wants to take all this?”

“I’ve already accepted the intern thing with Otto” Peter states.

He wasn’t going to back out of the opportunity that Otto had handed him. It was really what Peter was right then. Doing something good, something he could see the potential in.

Tony’s offer of a job, a lab to call his own, a future that was stable and secure… somehow Peter couldn’t see himself in it yet. Not because of the weapons, but because Peter had always been restless, in some way he couldn’t quite explain. Needing something more, something to grasp onto on nights…

Both physically and, well, mentally.

Michelle leans in close to him, watching the pencil drawings. “What even is this?”

“Uh… a shield I guess.” Peter looks down at it. He hadn’t even realized until now what he’d drawing. The suit that he’d used to escape the cave. He’d been lost in thought. “I build this, you know. In the cave with Yinsen. Powered it with this.” Peter taps his chest. Metal echoed between them.

“Peter…” Michelle calls his name softly.

Peter discards his notes and meets her eyes. “MJ?”

She sighs. Takes a deep breath. Her shoulders slump. “You don’t have to choose, if Otto and Stark want you, I’m sure they can share.” It’s half said as a joke, and half in a serious tone. That Peter shouldn’t limit himself, that if he wanted to, they’d figure it out.

“I won’t have time…” he hesitates, “When I go back to ESU.”

“Will you?” Michelle asks, leaning into his side. Her contacts ground him, “Go back to ESU, I mean. You’re not doing good, isn’t it… isn’t it better to wait and see? Do something more flexible for a little while?”

“MJ…”

She takes his hand. Holds onto him, as if he might slip away if she didn’t. Maybe he would. Not physically, but back to Ben's death, or back into that damn cold cave. Back into a world, where he’d look down at his chest, just to be reminded of the arc reactor there, keeping him alive.

A reminder that he was alive. That he wasn’t there anymore.

That- “If Ben was here, he’d tell you to take a break. After all you’ve been through, you need to get back on your feet. Do something you love. You don’t need a degree to change the world, you just need this.” She smiles and pads his chest. “And a little help from people with money and resources.”

And maybe, just maybe, she was right.

He’d have to talk to his therapist about that.

But also, “He makes weapons, MJ.”

“Well, maybe all he needs is someone who can show him a better path.”

 

***

 

Peter has relived Ben’s death many times since the afternoon when it happened.

Colorful ice creams in Central Park.

Talks about life, about hopes, about dreams, about school.

Responsibility.

Returning home, alone…

Subway. Hiding. Girl. Gun. Crying. Screaming. Running. Bleeding.

“Ben? Ben! Ben, Ben can you hear me? Ben!”

He’s seen it through his own eyes, hiding a few steps down into the underground, watching from behind as Ben collapses to the ground. Blood stained the ground, Ben’s clothes, and Peter’s hands are he put pressure on the wound. Glossy eyes, half lidded. Cold. Dead.

Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead.

He’d seen it through Ben’s eyes. A sense of wrong, wrong, wrong, flushes through his body as the girl's cries reach his ears. A sense of hope, when the gun isn’t seen, a sense of hope that the girl isn’t dead. A sense of dread as the gun is pulled, and a sense of dread as Ben pulls his own too. Aiming. He a sense of loss as he falls backward, sharp pain traveling through his body. A sense of wrong, as he looks up at a tearful teen calling his name as he dies…

Dies. Dies. Dies. Dies.

He has seen it from the point of the girl. Tight hands holding onto her thin frame, fear keeping her close to him, but not too close. Seeing someone willing to help, seeing someone who would save her… only to see him fall, and not understanding what was happening. Just knowing that it was all wrong.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

He has even seen it through the eyes of the shooter, all the way from picking up the girl with a gun pressed against her little, tiny head, fear glittering in her eyes. To watch Central Park slowly fade, and the sun disappears on the horizon. Feels the trigger pull under his power.

Power. Power. Power. Power.

Some nights he’ll be so scared that he can’t move. His legs will be encapsulated by ice, or his feet will be stuck to the ground with roots. Other nights he’ll run towards Ben in slow motion, only to never reach him. Or he’ll reach him, throwing himself in front of Ben, the bullet going through them both. Popping in Peter’s ears, Ben still dies.

If he’s lucky Ben says nothing in his dreams. Nightmares. His life repeating itself again and again. But he’s rarely lucky, so instead a reanimated version of his uncle will look at him with zombie green skin, and speak. “You killed me, Peter. You made your aunt a widow.”

So, yeah… Peter has dreamt about that horrible day a lot.

But he’s never seen it from above.

Not until tonight.

It starts the same way that it always does. At Central Park, the sun setting on the horizon, and people celebrating life around them. They eat colorful ice cream, sitting on a bench, like a five-year-old kid and a parent.

They walk through the park together, talking. “If I can make sure you walk down the best path for you, don’t you think I have a responsibility to support you?” Dream Ben asks.

Peter feels his head nod like it had that day. Feels his lips part. A younger version of himself speaks, echoing words he’d spoken years ago, “With great power… must also come, great responsibility.”

“Peter, you have the power, to make the world a better place through science. So, you have a responsibility to do just that.”

They reach the concrete jungle that surrounds the park. They leave the gravel path behind, replaced by hard, gray, stone. Peter and Ben walk side by side, smiles on their faces when Ben stops in his tracks. Looks over his shoulders.

“Ben?”

Ben does not respond. Peter knows that Ben won’t look back at him. Feels himself pushed to safety, only… he doesn’t go down the steps into the subway. He goes up.

He’s floating.

Levitating.

… Flying.

He’s high above the desert sand, looking down at his footprints. Looking down at Ben and the little girl, her cries reach him as if he were standing right by her. And the man lowers his gun looking upwards, looking at Peter. Fear coloring his face, pale, clammy, skin.

“Hand where I can see them! Let the girl go.” It isn’t Ben who speaks, it’s Peter. His voice was oddly robotic and hollow and distant and- and what is that before his eyes?

Blue light appears around the gun, informing him of it’s status. Safety on, loaded, caliber 36.

A HUD.

The man lets the gun drop to the ground where it bounces before disappearing into the sound. Swallowed up. “Please, please don’t shoot me…”

Peter looks down at himself then. Sees the armor he and Yinsen had built. Feels it’s heavy, cold weight surrounds his body. But it’s oddly comfortable. As if shaped specifically for him. As if… as if… as if it wasn’t built in a cave, but built in a lab.

And there in his chest, glowing, lightning up the whole world, sits the arc reactor.

He lands before the man, shielding Ben. “Whatever you’re trying to achieve, you don’t need her. Let her come to me, and I’ll let you go.”

The man doesn’t need to hear it twice. The girl is let go, her tiny legs running towards him. Peter kneels to pick her up into a strong embrace and watches as the man makes his escape.

“You did so good Peter” Ben echoes, “I’m so proud of you.”

 

***

 

Peter gasps for air as the real world appears before him.

It’s dark. Only the light of his chest reflects in the windows.

“Pete?” Michelle sounds tired beside him, looks up at him, “Did you have a nightmare again?”

The arc reactor hums in his chest. Vibrates through his body. Air reaches his lungs slowly, his heart beats in a steady rhythm. Light… He’d seen the light. He’d been about to die…

But he’d beat it.

He could beat it.

Peter nods slowly and swallows. Lays back down, letting his arms pull Michelle close. “I’m okay. I’m sorry for waking you.”

Notes:

Okay, look. I didn't plan to publish this till Monday, but I just couldn't wait.

I hope it was enjoyable!

Chapter 8: Beginnings

Peter tries but doesn’t manage to fall asleep again that night. The accelerating feeling, the flying high above the desert sand, the saving of someone he cares about – even if it’s only a dream – has his head spinning with ideas. His hands itching to get ready to work. He needs to build something. No, not something, he needs to build a suit.

For a while he stays in bed, watching over the doodles and notes he’d created ever since he returned home. Ideas flowed from his brain, down through his arm, and out through the tips of his fingers. He doesn’t remember most of them, having gone with the flow.

But even that becomes boring after a while, and with Michelle still sleeping and the early morning sun starting to peep through their bedroom window, Peter gets up. Packs his backpack with notes tolls and pencil cases. Pulls on his ESU hoodie, because it’s nice and warm, and doesn’t allow the blue light of his chest to escape – it looks cool, but Peter finds himself self-conscious anyway. And then he heads towards Otto’s private laboratory, sponsored by Norman Osborn, with a cup of coffee in his hand.

The lab is quiet when he gets there, so Peter sets up alone and starts to study the arm.

The issue with Peter’s first suit design was, that he’d been limited by the materials he could get. They’d had to forge the metal into shape, the red, warm glow, making it malleable. It had only been successful because Yinsen had experience. Peter would have been dead without him.

In a modern world with modern technology, however, Peter could 3D print metal for the suit. Much like Otto had done with carbon fiber and the prototype arm.

That would allow for a suit that was much sleeker and lighter than the original. With a little luck, Peter would even be able to get it on and off on his own.

He uses the shell of Otto’s arm as the base for his suit design. Adding a little extra space in his numbers, so that there would be space for wiring and circuit boards underneath. If he was going to be flying, he would also need to stay up to date with air control, so a basic HUD and control for it would be invaluable too.

The original clunk of metal had used modified rockets to allow Peter to fly. In reality, it was more like giving him a short moment of airtime, but they hadn’t had time to figure out something better, and even if they had their resources had been too spars. But Peter had an arc reactor, so an even better, stronger version. Built for sustained flight, so, Peter would need repulsors. Flight repulsors. Stabilizers. Something powerful enough to carry not only Peter but the full weight of the armor, into the air for extended periods. Without failing and letting him drop to the ground.

Peter would never be able to build it at Otto’s lab. While it was much more advanced than the laboratories at school, it didn’t quite have everything that he’d need to succeed. He couldn’t ask Otto for materials either, the scientist was already on a tight budget.

He could however build it at Stark Industries.

“Peter?” Otto’s voice pulls him out of his focused mindset. “Didn’t expect to see you here too early.”

The man comes up to him, studying Peter’s notebook. It’s filled to the brim with new designs for suits ideas, HUDs and arc reactor specs and material ideas – like a gold, titanium alloy – and scribbles that Peter can’t quite make out but must be something about energy consumption and heat resistance. He’d figure it out later.

He greets his professor with a big, shy smile. He hadn’t meant to stay long enough for Otto to join him. “Sorry, I hope you don’t mind I just… guess I was inspired.”

“That’s alright Parker” Otto pulls his lab coat on, slowly getting ready for his day of work. “I’m sure it can be a little much sitting on that apartment of yours all day. Have you decided when you’re coming back to school? Can’t wait too long if you want to be capable of finishing the exams.”

“Oh, uh, yeah… about that-“

Otto looks at him with narrow eyes, “You are coming back to finish your degree at ESU?”

Okay, so… Michelle was right. His girlfriend usually way. Not just about what Ben would have wanted, even if that was spot on too. Getting back to his feet, gives himself a break. But if this morning was any indication, Peter wasn’t sleeping, wasn’t living for himself again yet. Wasn’t quite ready to change the world, the way he’d originally dreamed of.

He still had plans. Big plans. Good plans. Hopeful plans. But he couldn’t do that, while at the edge of a panic attack, having restless, nightmare-filled nights, and feeling this… this horrible guilt grows in his chest every time he thinks of what happened back there.

Jason shouldn’t have died, he should have stayed in the car with Peter, where it was safe. Yinsen shouldn’t have given his life for him, because Yinsen had been the only reason Peter was alive.

Survivor's guilt, his therapist told him. A natural part of the process. A sign of PTSD.

“You’re experience with Ben must have been traumatic too, but for some people, PTSD doesn’t show itself before a long time after. When they’ve repeated that breaking point, over and over again until suddenly you snap something much deeper. Didn’t you tell me, you saw Ben in the desert? That was your brain's way of protecting you. Relive something dark, in an attempt to prevent something much darker from taking it’s place.”

It was true. Peter had seen the blood and heard the bullets echoing in the sand. Maybe all that was the reason Ben hadn’t been in New York in his dream last night but in the desert.

Far from the home they both knew.

“Peter?” Otto shakes his shoulder gently. Peter must have zoned out. His hands are clenched, nails digging deep into his palms. Drawing faint drops of blood. “Are you alright?”

He shakes his head. Halfway at the question about ESU, and halfway at Otto’s concern. “I think there’s something I have to do before I can go back,” Peter explains. “Like… if I somehow left some piece of myself behind back in that cave, that I need to rebuild… or replace, maybe.”

Peter isn’t even sure it makes sense. He isn’t a machine, he’s a human. But Otto nods along slowly, a care, an understanding, in every movement.

“Please remember Peter, everyone back at ESU wants to see you succeed after what happened.” His professor assures. His expertise with struggling students becomes clear in moments like these. “No matter what that means. We’ve got your back.”

He gives Otto a thankful smile. Appreciate the gesture.

“I wanted to ask you something,” Peter reveals a second later. He doesn’t know the words, a choice made in a second of hopelessness. He needed to build that suit, no matter the cost. Not for himself, but for the people that could be saved. For Jason Yinsen and Ben. “If I was offered a job at a big-time tech company, working closely with the boss, would that cause issues with all of this…” Peter waves his hand at the lab. The internship. The changing the world. The powering prosthetics with an arc reactor.

Otto just chuckles and shakes his head. “Don’t worry about any of that Peter. Do what feels right to you to you in the moment” he smiles, “My lab is always open for bright, young minds like yours.”

 

***

 

When Peter leaves the lab a short while later, he heads back towards his apartment. Agent Phil Coulson is waiting in his car, coming out to greet him when he spots Peter. “I thought we were supposed to meet thirty minutes ago” the man comments without any real heat in his voice.

“Sorry” Peter greets him with a tight handshake, “I was at the lab. Working.”

Coulson nods, “If you need a bit more time-“

“No, no. I did just, forget about the time.” Peter tightens the grasp on his back, “But uh, we might have to cut it short. I’m meeting with Tony.” He’d texted the man in the subway. Michelle had been right about that too, that maybe Peter had the chance to show Tony a new path. And if not, well, would it be an issue to use Stark resources? It sounded bad, but if it could help him change the world?

“Well jump in then” Coulson steps towards the car, “I’ll give you a lift. We can talk on the way.”

For a meeting with a secret organization, the meeting becomes oddly informal as they drive through the city. Just two strangers in a car, talking about life. Peter finds out that Coulson has worked with Shield most of his life, and that the man loved it. Finds out that Shield has been watching from a distance, and while most didn’t know about them, they were completely legal. Even overseen by high-standing people. Finds out that Coulson has friends in there, smart people, hackers, and almost a family.

“It isn’t all about Shield though,” Coulson reminds as they’re waiting for the green light. The car vibrating. “We know it must have been traumatic, but we need to know what happened in that cave. How did they capture you? Where there anyone else there? How did you escape?”

Peter explains the best he can about the whole that day. Landing, meeting General Rhodes, going to the presentation of Jarrico. Tells him about the people in the car, about the conversation and the questions, about how suddenly it wasn’t fun or calm, because people were shooting. Tells him about the bomb, and the flashbacks to Ben.

He moves on to waking up. The threats, the demands, Yinsen. He doesn’t go into detail about the arc reactor build, because Coulson is cool, but the science behind it is complicated and boring to those who didn’t understand.

And then finally the escape comes around. “You build a metal suit, that could fly?” Coulson asks in disbelief.

“You have a flying car!” Peter shoots back. Because that is one of the things Coulson had revealed. “You named it Lola. Who names their cars?”

“So, the suit was destroyed. And shortly thereafter, General Rhodes and his team found you?” Coulson asks for confirmation and Peter nods. It’s the first time he’s talked about the actual escape, and he hadn’t thought about it before, but Coulson has good points to make. “We’ll need Shield to collect whatever is left of it. If it was the ten rings, and the suit fell into the wrong hands, it could end badly.”

Peter nods slowly, “But they don’t have the power source.”

“Yet” Coulson agrees. “I think you and Stark working together could be beneficial for both of you. But I’ll ask you to be cautious with who you share the arc reactor with.”

“What? You think someone would try and steal it?” Peter doesn’t believe his ears.

Coulson shrugs, and the Stark tower appears in the distance. “If I’ve learned one thing during my time with Shield, it would be that you can’t always trust the people closest to you. Sometimes people’s intentions change over time. Maybe Stark is safe, but someone around him isn’t. Be careful.”

Peter nods.

“Also, take this.” Coulson hands Peter a small black box.

He slides the light off, finding an old phone. Ben had one similar to it, back when Peter was a kid. Like, fifteen years earlier. It reminded him of its ringtone, of its indestructible nature. “What is this?”

Coulson pulls up onto the curb next to the tower. “If someone, anyone, threatens you or tries something that makes you uncomfortable. Call the number on that phone. We’re here to help.”

That appears to be a common theme that day. First Otto, then Shield. But Peter can feel his gut instinct telling him that something isn’t right. He just can’t place it. He wonders if it’s just nerves now that Coulson has revealed stuff.

He slides out of the car. Waves goodbye as the car drives off.

The phone is left in his pocket.

 

***

 

Tony was already waiting in the lobby when Peter entered. Happy Hogen hovers in the background, but Tony doesn’t seem to mind his security guard much. Because he steps forward and pulls Peter into a hug. It’s awkward and tight and makes Peter’s heart beat a little faster, but he doesn’t fight it. The pressure around his body is nice right then. Grounding after his conversation with Coulson.

Not as good as May’s hugs. Michelle’s body presses against his in their shared bed back home. But it would do for now.

When the hug ends Tony is smiling. “I guess this means you’ve thought about my offer.”

“I have” Peter confirms.

“So?”

Peter nods with as much confidence as he can muster. “I do have concerns. Things we need to discuss.”

“Like?”

“No more weapons.” Peter sounds so much like Ben then. “I mean what I said at the press conference. I don’t blame you for the attack, but there is a security issue with the amount of your weapons the attack had. I know, it might be hard to get out of contracts with the military but-“

“Done,” Tony says snapping his fingers.

Peter looks at him confused, “What?”

“If that’s what it takes, I’m willing to comply. My stocks are dropping kid, people hate the company now. I have nothing to lose” Tony grins, “I’ll even make it official, press conference, articles about green energy, that was your project, right?”

Peter feels himself grin too, “Actually… it’s a bit more complicated than that.”

Chapter 9: Fear

Summary:

He’s back there, in that car. A bullet cracks the front window, and another shatters it. Glass falls in over him and the soldier. There’s glass in his hair, and under his t-shirt, but he stays there. The soldier covers Peter’s head with his hands the best he can, trying to prevent further injuries. “I’m going to have to go out there. You don’t leave this car, you don’t get up unless you have no other choice. You hear me?”

“You hear me?” Tony stands before him. Michelle hovers at his side. “You’re with me Pete?"

“You said in your application that you wanted to change the world for the better,” ESU’s student consular comments. Peter sits there in the big chair, of her tiny office. He’d hoped taking a medical leave would be something simple, he’d been officially diagnosed with PTSD three days prior, had brought the papers, and had a whole speech prepared that explained how he felt and why he needed to do this. But he’d ended up in that room, anyway, offers of extra support and counseling threw over his head. “You aren’t going up on that, right?”

Peter shakes his head, “No. Of course not. I’m just… I need a little time to figure things out. Do some actual work, something flexible, without the pressure of performing for the upcoming exams?”

She nods along kindly, “I can understand that. Don’t worry, it won’t be an issue at all. We just need to make sure that we’ve given all options a try or at least have reason to dismiss them.”

“So…?” Peter’s body tenses.

“I’d tell you to come talk to me once a week… but” She shakes her head, and taps the paper with Peter’s diagnosis, “You already have someone working close with you. I hope you feel better soon, Peter. I’m sure most of us can only imagine what those attacks were like.”

 

***

 

“What did they say?” Michelle drops onto their shared bed the second she walks through their apartment doors. Her hair falls out of the tight bun, curls spilling across the white sheets. “Let me guess, they wanted to double-check that you knew what you were doing. That this wasn’t you giving up on life, but just needing to readjust, and… signed you up for classes next year?”

Peter leans over her and lets his body embrace hers. “Yes. Yes… and, No. We didn’t.”

Michelle’s eyes widen at the last part. Confusion is clear, but happy all the same. Relived. Peter was a great student, and while ESU were known for to awesome about giving student what they needed to succeed, there where always fear that things didn’t go as planned.

“I explained to them that I wasn’t sure how long recovering would take. That, sure was PTSD, but there are medical sides to it too, which isn’t a lie.” Michelle's hands reaches for the arc reactor. Rests against it, feels it the way you would a beating heart. The way she’d always done during Peter’s panic attack, feeling his breath, feeling him live. Peter mirrors the action on her chest. “Mentioned that I’d been offered a job, too. That I’d be working part-time during my time off…”

“So, they decided to give you all the time you need?” Michelle asks for confirmation. Peter nods. Swallows hard. “That’s amazing Peter. This is what you wanted.”

“It is.” He nods, “That… and… this…” Peter leans in, placing a soft kiss across Michelle's lips and then one at the collarbone, slowly making his way down.

 

***

 

His phone vibrates against their bedside table. Lighting up the darkening room. Michelle’s naked body lays onto of Peter’s own. Her curls rested against his chest. “You know… Your kisses taste like coconuts. Which is weird, by oddly pleasant.”

“It’s probably the Vibranium” Peter comments, “Some of it makes it into the bloodstream. I’ve been having this oddly sweet taste in my mouth since I installed the new core.”

The phone vibrates again. “You should check it.”

Peter stretches under her, pulling the phone into his head before becoming comfortable once more. He swipes across the screen. “Tony wants to invite us to a celebratory dinner tomorrow night” Peter comments, “You’re in?”

“Will I be the only girl there?” Michelle asks, “Because, might be better if it’s just you then.”

“I’ll tell him to invite Pepper and May” Peter smiles. Michelle steals a miss across his cheekbone. Peter lets himself enjoy it. Feels her warmth as they hide under the covers for a little longer.

He’d missed this more than anything, back in that cave. “Well… I can always find an excuse to have a billionaire pay for a very extravagant dinner.”

 

***

 

It’s not just the six of them. Outside of Tony, Happy, Pepper, Michelle, Peter, and course May, Tony has also invited General Rhodes. The man seems pleasantly surprised when he spots Peter together with Michelle at the table.

The restaurant is fancy beyond anything in Peter’s prize range. It almost doesn’t feel real. Servers are bouncing around them, carefully offering win and drinks and food and even the best ice cream Peter has ever tasted. It’s specially imported from Italy. And the conversations flow rather easily too. Peter soon calls General Rhodey.

“I’m surprised. I didn’t expect to see you walking around so soon.” Rhodey takes in Peter’s body. His frame. Scans him. Peter is so tired of being scanned as if people are searching for that tiny crack, waiting to grow, waiting to shatter him.

Peter tries to ignore it, “I’m doing pretty well.”

“We’re working on something big,” Tony proudly informs, nudging Peter’s shoulder, “We’re starting to anyway. Tell him about it Pete.” There’s a softness there, a wonder.

He’d seen it back at the lab too when he saw the arc reactor. As if, Peter Parker was somehow keeping Tony Stark on his toes. “I don’t really-“ Tony’s eyes turn pleading and Peter lowers his spoon, “It’s pretty early, but it has something to do with arc reactor technology. Long-term plans include the possibility of plans the size of a man. Hopefully…”

“As a former pilot in the Air Force, that piques my curiosity.” Rhodey smiles, “What’s the time horizon on something like that, sounds too good to be true.”

“I don’t know for sure. The prototype, was, high…” He remembers Coulson’s words. Peter’s technology shouldn’t end up in the wrong hands, but Peter didn’t know what the wrong hands were. He doubted Rhodey or Tony would do anything bad with it, but… “The prototype in my simulator took like, three months. But I think, together with Tony, a few weeks maybe?”

Rhodey nods, “But it’s not a weapon, right? After what you said at the press conference, I got the impression you weren’t happy about guns.”

Peter looks to May who stiffens slightly, before taking a sip of her win.

She shared Peter’s hate for weapons… maybe he’d gotten it from her.

“My uncle, he was a police officer. Former military. He was shot and killed a few months before I started at ESU. I was there. I think that’s a pretty good reason to hate guns.”

“I can understand that” Rhodey nods, “And I think it’s good to create something that isn’t for the military. To do something different. Your project, the one that won the competition, the mini-arc reactor? It works?”

Tony snorts, “Wouldn’t have hired him if it didn’t!”

“Well, let's cheer for that” Rhodey holds up his glass, and soon the table follows. A cheer of celebration echoed through the room.

Then he’s back there, where it all started. “Cheers to one of my brightest students, Congratulations Peter.” Otto raises a glass, and the group follows him. Back to the day when he made that choice, taking the trip, accepting the funding, the choice to lead him to a battle zone. A war zone. In his ears, the glasses don’t click against each other… no… it’s replaced with the sound of a bullet in his head. The sight of blood. “He’s the Merchant of Death, May…”

“Pete?” Tony shakes his shoulder, “You alright?”

He blinks. Gone are Otto and Liz and Abe and Ned. Gone are Champagne and ESU. They’re at the restaurant. They’re safe. And Tony no longer makes weapons.

 

***

 

“Since you live in New York this is going to be our primary base of operation” Tony waves at his lab. The view of the city dances in the background behind him. Peter’s home. “I’ll have someone bring my gear up here, but I need to know what we need before I can do that. So, what exactly are we building, outside of a clean energy source?”

Peter opens his folders and notebooks. Allows Tony to read over the pages. Suit designs and arc reactor upgrades. Ideas for how arc reactor could be used for green energy, letting power run through buildings in a way unlike anything else.

“What is this?” Tony holds up one of the suit designs, “It’s a man?”

“This is mark 1, the one I used to escape the ten rings” Peter grins as Tony's face morphs into pure shock. “I was kind of thinking we could build a mark 2. Something better, that can keep up flight for more than a few seconds. In the long run, it could help people.”

“HUD? Interface? That I’ll take care of. I’ll have Jarvis run something” Tony snaps his fingers. A blue hologram appears between the two of them, a percent bar slowly counting.

“Yes sir,” Jarvis replies. Tony’s AI.

“Flight repulsors? Stabilizers? And a pretty solid design already, we can probably get started on those today, and it them done by the time the fabricator is moved from my Workshop.” Tony runs through the list, “Gold titanium alley? Good thinking should be light enough for flight and shouldn’t be affected by ice in the upper atmosphere. Could you imagine making it of steel and it just freezes over? Bad way to die, I’d imagine.”

Tony drops the notepad on the table before them, and with a swift hand motion, the drawings turn blue before appearing in 3D before Peter’s eyes.

Peter carefully touches it, seeing it bend around his will. Watches as each piece becomes manipulatable on its own. Carefully he focuses on the repulsors. Watches at the Holo does the same. Watches as it follows Peter’s arm. Each movement. “That’s so cool!”

“Would you like to auto-save any change, Peter?”

“Can you save them to my computer?” Peter asks carefully.

“Of course, sir.”

“While you do that.” Tony nods at the holo-gram already in Peter’s hand, “How about I make the suit sleek? Pretty? Then, we can probably speed things up. Have it ready for flight in a week or two.”

Peter nods, but barely hears a word Tony says. Already caught up in his work. Adjusting the suit to fit his needs. A shield, covering his entire body. A plane, that anyone could enter.

 

***

 

It feels impossible when they are just a week later having the first boot ready. And then the second.

Tony had careful hands, almost as careful as Yinsen’s. But rougher at the same time. It speeds things up when it comes to the soldering work, which would have taken Peter weeks.

Oh, and Dum-E was pretty helpful too.

(He wasn’t helpful at all, but Peter didn’t feel like he could tell the bot that.)

“Start mark, half a meter, and back and center.” Tony reminds him as Peter makes it onto the reinforced platform. Repulors created a lot of energy and a lot of warmth. They couldn’t just fly it anywhere in the lab, at least not without causing damage to things.

It was hard to believe that a week ago, this had only been a dream. “You’re ready?”

“Ready as ever!” Peter smiles and nods. Taking the controllers from Tony’s hands so the man can step away. Dum-E is on camera duty, together with Dum-U, Tony’s second bot.

“Activate hand controls,” Peter asks.

A moment later the speakers come to life, “Hand controls are active.”

Tony smiles giving him a big thumbs up. “Just, nice and easy. You can do this.”

“How about we start with, thrust capacity at 10% and see if that achieves lifts?” Peter suggests. Javis hums in confirmation. 10% sounded about right.

Tony counts down, and Peter pushes the buttons in his hands. The repulsors under his feet blast to life with a powerful burst. It doesn’t just achieve lifts, it sends Peter slamming headfirst into a concrete wall, and he regrets then not making hand stabilizers too, because that fucking hurts.

His head is spinning, throbbing painfully. He doesn’t notice when Tony reaches him, but suddenly the man is looking down at him with worry.

“I think 10% was too much…” Peter mutters and with the help of Tony gets off the boots and gets back off. “Way too much.”

 

***

 

Tony closes the metal arm around Peter’s wrist and starts working on the stabilizers, just as Pepper and Michelle enter the lab. They’re both smiling kindly at them, Michelle taking the lab in with awe-struck eyes, much like Peter had a few weeks prior. “We tried buzzing you. Did you hear the intercom?”

“Sorry, Mrs. Potts. It would appear the intercom has been muted. It will be fixed in just a moment.”

“In my defense, Jarvis has been busy making a HUD for Peter here” Tony takes the cup of coffee that Pepper offers him. Swallows it in a single mouthful.

Michelle comes to a stop behind Peter. Pulling him into a backward embrace that makes Peter lean into it. He forgets about the suit around his arm, letting it relax too. The repulsors actives, a beam of light flying across the lab, and right into a glass wall that splinters.

He’s back there, in that car. A bullet cracks the front window, and another shatters it. Glass falls in over him and the soldier. There’s glass in his hair, and under his t-shirt, but he stays there. The soldier covers Peter’s head with his hands the best he can, trying to prevent further injuries. “I’m going to have to go out there. You don’t leave this car, you don’t get up unless you have no other choice. You hear me?”

“You hear me?” Tony stands before him. Michelle hovers at his side. “You’re with me Pete? Whatever you’re seeing, whatever you are right now, it isn’t real. You’re in my lab, at Stark Tower, we’re working on the suit.”

He nods. Swallows hard. His heart beating fast against his chest. Painfully so. It’s sharp and hard. There’s not one, there are a million. A million little things in his chest. But he can’t see them.

Right. The suit. The suit that had saved Ben in the cave.

Peter feels bill raise in his throat. His lungs are burning. His head thuds painfully.

“I think I’m done…” Peter grasps out, “For today. Done.”

Tony nods after a moment. “Yeah, that’s probably best… We have a guest room right upstairs if you want it. Might be more comfortable than driving all the way home through the loud city?”

Peter nods slowly.

 

***

 

“You’re sure you want to do this kid?” Tony and Peter are sitting on the bed in the guest room. Michelle and Pepper are chattering somewhere else in the penthouse, the voice traveling through the corridors. “It’s triggering whatever happened that day.”

Peter is almost surprised Tony has noticed. It’s true. Ever since the project became official it went from dark thoughts and nightmares and flashes of death before his eyes, to full-on Flashbacks.

He nods tensely all the same. “I have to.”

“Why?” Tony looks at him worriedly, “You’ve had three panic attacks during the last week, Pete…”

Why?

Why?

“A smart man once told me, that if you can, have the power to, change the world, then you have a responsibility to do so. Because with great powers, must also come great responsibility” Peter explains, remembering the day in the park. Ben and him together. Rainbow ice cream, celebrations, ESU conversations. Death. Death. Death.

Tony nods slowly, “So the suit? It’s your power to what…?”

Peter shrugs. “It’s just, it’s my second chance. The only way for me to get back to who I was supposed to become.” Because that had been Yinsen’s point. That Peter had missed something important by being in the cave.

He couldn’t ever know what it was or why it mattered. But he knew that it did.

“If my dad was alive today, I would have asked him if he ever had any regrets” Tony confesses. “About the company, about the legacy we’re leaving behind. Kid, I’m not going to stop you, because you made me see things that day. That I’m indirectly the cause of a lot of death. A lot of hurt. But if we’re doing this, you need to talk to me when these attacks happen. Okay?”

Peter meets his eyes and nods feeling tears threatening to spill at Tony doesn’t just pad his shoulder but pulls him into a hug.

He’d needed that.

He’d needed that.

It sounds too childish and so weird because Michelle and May hug him all the time. But they don’t do it like Ben does… Tony doesn’t either, but, it still gives him something different.

“Thank you.”

“Yeah, yeah. No problem kiddo.”

 

***

 

“Otto?” Peter calls as he enters the lab. It’s oddly quiet. They’d been meaning to meet up that night, work on the arm, and test it with the new and improved arc reactor. And then Otto isn’t there.

Peter slowly walks through the dark lab, when he sees it. His professor lying across the floor, next to his workstation. “Otto? Otto!” Peter moves towards him in quick strides, feeling for a pulse, feeling for breathing, checking for injuries. The man slowly wakes in Peter’s arms. “Otto, what happened?”

His professor blinks up at him slowly sitting up. Pulling himself loose from Peter’s grasp. “You’re late.”

“Are you okay?” Peter ignores the man, “You were passed out, did something happen?”

Otto shakes his head but steadies himself at his lab table when he gets up. He looks so big standing there above Peter. “I’m fine. Thank you, Peter. But I think it’s better if you leave now. I have an important meeting with a company that offers better funding.”

“Sorry, I just thought we were supposed to test out the arm today.” Peter wonders out loud.

Otto takes a deep breath. Becomes more himself. “Of course, sorry. If you leave the prototype reactor here I’ll have the test results by tomorrow.”

Carefully Peter nods. Leaving the box with the only other arc reactor at Otto’s desk.

“Call me if you need anything, Professor.”

Notes:

Welp, we're actually building an iron man suit now!

Also, how to make Tony Stark a softy in less than 3k words?

Chapter 10: Flight

Summary:

“-ter? Peter!” Tony’s voice comes suddenly, and with it, flight resumes. “Shit, kid? Are you with me? Please…” Peter has no idea how much Tony can see. How much Tony has seen?

He doesn’t care. “That was amazing! Woah!” He laughs.

Tony sounds annoyed and scared on the other end. Breathless. “Christ Pete. You just shaved ten years of my life. If I’m finding gray hairs tomorrow, it’s your fault!”

“I don’t know” Peter pocks at his dinner. Sitting in his and Michelle’s kitchen. “He just… it was weird. I’ve been busy with Tony, but I’ve spent plenty of time doing work for Otto too. Fixing up a hole arc reactor for him to use, testing materials for the arms production, making sure nothing would short-circuit… and then he just, he was so hostile. As if he didn’t even know me.”  

He had been so different from how his professor usually was, that it lingers in the back of Peter’s mind still. The cold, pale man lying across his lab floor in the afternoon, when Peter finally showed up. Breathing shallow and eyes glazed.

Michelle chews slowly on the other side of the table, “Maybe he’s just stressed? You said yourself that Osborn isn’t giving him enough funding, finding someone to take over a project that already demands so much is probably really difficult. Did he mention who the meeting was with?”

Peter shakes his head slowly. Otto hadn’t said much of anything except to throw Peter out of the lab.

“Peter?” Michelle sounds worried as she speaks, putting on the same voice she’d used when Peter had a flashback of a panic attack. Which was happening more and more often. In Tony’s lab, at home. In the subway. Michelle became soft and kind and worried, instead of sarcastic and funny and awesome.

He lifts his head, meeting her eyes. Showing her that he was there, that he wasn’t stuck somewhere else again. She goes on, “You said he’d been passed out, do you know if Otto is sick or something? That sounds pretty concerning.”

“It is” Peter agrees with a nod, “Maybe? I guess it could explain why he was being so defensive.”

“He probably doesn’t want you to worry about him, while you’re struggling to keep solid ground under your own two feet. I’m sure, once things settle down a bit, that he’ll talk to you.” Michelle sounds so sure, and her confidence does make Peter feel better.

Of course, she’s right. She had to be.

Otto had invited Peter into the project, allowing him full access to his lab and his research. He wanted Peter there. So, maybe it was stress. Maybe he was sick. But if it was something Peter should worry about, Otto would tell him. Sooner rather than later. He’d been the man who set up a meeting with ESU for Peter, after all, the man who encouraged him to do the competition in the first place. He believes that Peter could do some good work, and so Peter has to believe that Otto trusts him too. Worrying about it wouldn’t help either of them.

“Yeah. You’re right MJ. It was just… weird” Peter shrugs and keeps pushing the food around his plate. Because he didn’t feel hungry right then.

“Eat” Michelle reminds him after another minute of them sitting there together, “Otherwise I might think I’m as bad a cook as May!”

Peter sputters with laughter, “Oh my God, MJ! You’ll never be as bad a cook as May. Remember when she somehow burned ice cream? I still have no idea what she was trying to make.”

“She’d probably watched too many of those ice cream frosting videos on Facebook. From that fake profile?” Michelle suggests with a soft snort and joins Peter’s laughter.

In moments like these Peter could forget about all the bad things happening around him. Remembering that there will still be space for good things in his life. Powerful, happy moments. Moments that made him feel like the cave had never been, and Yinsen and Jasen had never died. It reminded him of those first dates when they barely knew each other’s names. A time when he’d called her Michelle, instead of MJ.

(My friends call me MJ.)

Michelle grins after a long second, clearly having gotten an idea. “You’re going to the Tower tomorrow, right? For another flight test?”

Peter nods slowly. Unsure where Michelle is going.

“You could stop by Otto’s lab tomorrow afternoon, and pick up chines from that place he likes. If he was just stressed about the meeting, there should be news now that it’s over, right?” Michelle is smiling, clearly knowing that Peter fully agrees with her idea.

After a short moment, he relaxes fully. “That isn’t a bad idea.”

 

***

 

Peter showed up at Tony’s lab just in time for lunch. The older man had Jarvis order Pizza from some crazy expensive restaurant, with crazy amounts of cheese. It was greasy as hell and probably wasn’t good for Peter’s heart run by a literal arc reactor filled with the rarest element on earth Vibranium, but he ate it anywhere because it was good, and Peter was hungry.

“It’s day 11” Tony talks to the camera while he later helps Peter get the boots and glows on, before connecting everything to the arc reactor in his chest. “Test 37, configuration 2.0.”

Peter carefully moved his fingers in the half-open metal glow, that was more like a cage with wires. It was tight, digging into his skin and leaving marks, and would probably leave his skin raw if he wore it for long. “Do you do videos like this every time you build something new?” Peter can’t help but ask. He’d been meaning to ask it the week prior.

“Only the cool stuff” Tony assures him with a smirk and connects the last cables. The boots and gauntlets come to life when Peter can almost feel them like an extension of himself. He’d gotten used to the arc reactor by now, and it was proving useful. “You should be all set. You ready?”

“Sure am!” They’d gotten closer and closer to good results over the last 9 tests. And while Peter was blue and yellow and bruised everywhere, even in places he didn’t know he had, nothing could stop him from making this reality.

He steps onto the fire-safe lab flooring.

He grins at the camera that Dum-E is controlling, “Alright, Jarvis. Uh… how about just 1% thrust capacity?” They knew this thing was powerful. They didn’t need much to get in the air.

“Certainly. Thrust capacity set to 1%.”

“Ready?” Tony takes a step back, clearing the space around him. When Peter confirms he counts down, “Three, two, one.”

The boots and gauntlets blast with life a half a second later. White, hot, flames shooting from his feet and hands. Repulsors working, and- Peter takes a deep breath, focuses, Stabilizer working.

For a second, he just hovers there in the air. A few inches over the floor.

Tony’s face morphs from worry to celebration. Because they’d done it! A few weeks ago, it had all been a dream, but now it was real. Peter was flying. And it felt amazing. After a moment of holding himself still in the air, and carefully allows himself to move a little. He felt his weight shift slightly and saw how his body would react in the air surrounding him. Before coming to a soft landing and Jarvis cutting off the power.

His cheeks are flushed. Body pumping with adrenaline. They’d done it. They’d done it!

“Please tell me Dum-E caught that on camera!” Peter is laughing. He feels weightless, despite being held to the ground by heavy metal around his limbs. “We did it!”

“We did!” Tony nods, “We’ve got another… thirty minutes before I have to head out for a meeting if you want to give it another try?”

Peter doesn’t need to be told twice. “Jarvis, bring it up to 2.5% thrust please.”

“Set to 2.5% thrust.”

This time the response is almost immediate. He hovers much higher in the air, and when Peter carefully moves around, he doesn’t move an inch or two, he flies a couple of meters in each direction. When that remains stable too, he takes his chance and leaves the small flying zone they’d set up. Dum-E following hot on his heels with the camera.

Peter does a lab around the main table, where Tony checks the temperature and energy level. Ready to cut power if something should suddenly go wrong.

For a long time, it’s just cool. Amazing even. Something he never would have thought to try if not for And then he’s flying. High about the desert. The mountains disappear, and he’s weightless. The arc reactor pumps in his chest, allowing adrenaline to fill his body.

It worked… it worked. It worked!

Then he’s crashing. Crashing towards the ground.

“Peter, are you okay? Your… you must be freezing. We need medical down here! He’s hypothermic.”

He doesn’t remember getting onto the ground. Doesn’t remember landing. But there he is, lying on the lab floor. The boots and gauntlet are long gone, discarded off to the side. Above him hovers Tony with worry on his face.

When Peter blinks his eyes open some of it seems to leave his body, though. Relief flooded him. “What…” Peter swallows and slowly pushes himself up. Tony is kneeling beside him.

“You’re heart rate spiked suddenly. Jarvis says it was another panic attack?” Tony studies him, “Are you feeling okay?”

Peter nods. Feels his heart racing deep inside his chest, somewhere behind the arc reactor. Feels his lungs struggling to take in air. “I’m good. I don’t even really remember what I saw.”

“If you’re sure” Tony plasters a smile onto his lips and gives Peter a hand up. Pulls him into his side, arm over his shoulder. “I’ve got that meeting in like” he checks his clock, “Ten minutes ago, so I have to get going before Pepper gets angry at me. But you can stay and catch your breath. Let Jarvis or Pepper know if you need anything, I’ll be just a few floors down.”

Peter appreciates it. He does. “Honestly, I think I’ll head out. I’m stopping by Otto’s lab on my way home.”

Tony frows at him, a slight worry on his face. It makes Peter feel uneasy. “I’m not going to stop you, but at least have Happy take you?” Peter agrees silently.

 

***

 

Panic attacks, PTSD flashbacks, and the whole passing out because you’ve forgotten how to breathe is exhausting. By the time Happy stops at Otto’s lab – after having picked up enough chines food to feed an army, paid for by Tony himself – Peter is asleep in the back.

Happy nudges him awake kindly. There isn’t any anger on his face. “You sure you don’t want me to take you home Kid?”

“Nah, I’m fine. Thanks, Happy” Peter takes the bag and his backpack and slides out of the car.

Happy nods slowly, “Call me when you want to head home. Bosses order say I drop you off there whenever you are ready.”

Peter rolls his eyes, “He’s worrying too much” he argues.

“You passed out in his lab, kid. Tony has a right to worry.” Happy states and Peter doesn’t have the energy to fight him. So he agrees before Happy pulls off the curb and back out into traffic.

Now that he’d gotten a little rest, and was starting to feel clearer in his head, he also started thinking. It was weird that his worst Flashbacks always happened at Tony’s lab. He spends plenty of time with Otto too, in a darker, colder lab. But he never had issues there.

Maybe it was because he’d known Otto that much longer. He felt safer, and more comfortable around the man than he did Tony.

Of course, it could be random too. He had panic attacks at home and at Otto’s lab too. Just less frequently.

He spends a few moments pulling his keys and badge out, before entering the building. The locking opening for a sharp click. In the hallway before the actual lab, Peter pulls on his lab coat. Tony didn’t use that sort of thing in his lab, but Tony didn’t work with chemicals either. Otto didn’t do that much either. But he did have chemicals just hanging around, so lab coat it was.

When he enters, Otto isn’t anywhere in the main lab. For a second Peter remember the afternoon from the day before. The anger in his voice. His dark eyes. But there isn’t an Otto passed out on the floor, either, so Peter moves towards one of the smaller rooms connected to the lab.

Sure enough, sitting before his computer running simulations, is Otto. “Hey Professor” Peter greets, dumping the warm plastic bag down next to the keyboard.

“Peter? What a nice surprise. I didn’t know you were coming today” Otto pulls him into a hug right away.

“Wasn’t planned” Peter smiles and hands over a box of food for Otto, “After yesterday I just wanted to check in, make sure everything was okay. That you weren’t hurt.”

Otto sighs deeply, “I’m sorry about that, Peter. I have just been rather stressed since Osborn is threatening to stop the funding of the lab. I had a meeting with another company last night, AIM, but I’m not sure if they’re a good match for our work.”

“AIM?” Peter questioned; he hadn’t heard about them before.

“Advanced Idea Mechanic” Otto nods, “They’ve done great work with other labs like mine, but…”

Peter opens his box, takes a soup dumpling, and drops it into his mouth in one piece. Felt it pop between his teeth. “If you need funding, we could always talk to Tony. He’s super interested in the arc reactor technology, and everything that it can do. We’re hoping to launch the green energy project from the competition in just six months!” Peter gushes. It wasn’t all about the suit, even if that was a part of their focus right now. There was much more to it.

“I’ll think about it” Otto nods, “Right now, AIM wanted a chance to give an actual offer about how much funding they can provide, before I make my decision.”

 

***

 

“You remember that really pretty dress you got me for my birthday last year?” Michelle writing on her computer when Peter walks in. Returning from the lab. She’s working on a new article for her class at ESU. Peter drops down next to her and nods, letting his backpack slip off his shoulder. “I haven’t had a chance to wear it yet.”

Peter leans into her side, resting his head on her shoulder as she types. He remembers the dress well because Michelle had pointed it out to him. Its yellow color makes Michelle pop.

“What do you want me to do about that?” Peter questions with a grin.

“Well…” Michelle closes the laptop before Peter can check what she’s writing about this time. He sits up straight and meets her eyes. There’s something serious about her but also relaxed. “As an employee at Stark Industries, you get invited to that Gala event, right?”

Peter shrugs, “I guess?”

“And I guess that event includes a plus one?” Michelle is direct. Peter nods slowly. “So, we’re going. Right?”

Peter studies his girlfriend for a long moment. Michelle wasn’t the type of person who wanted to go to big fancy parties, wear crazy dresses, and do her makeup. She was the type of person who’s considering a pint of ice cream on their shared couch, as a date. She was observant and powerful, being able to tell everything and anything about any person she met. Sometimes Peter wondered if she secretly had Superpowers. It wasn’t impossible, after all. There had been Steve Rogers, like seventy years earlier. During the war.

“I wasn’t planning on going, MJ. I don’t think it’d my thing.” Michelle looks at him with disappointment. “But if you want to, I guess…”

“Perfect” Michelle gets up, “That’s a date then.” She disappears with her laptop in her arms. Her loss sweatpants flopped around her feet.

Peter has half a mind to follow her, to seek out her warm, comforting presence. To tell her about what happened first at Tony’s lab, about the thrill of flying, about the adrenaline of the movement. About the flashback, panic attack, passing out. Tell her about how Otto had seemed fine, tell her about AIM. Tell her, about life. Because Michelle always asked about life.

But he doesn’t follow her. Let her spend the afternoon in their shared bedroom while she works on whatever had caught her attention.

Peter curls up on their couch with a warm blanket and tries to focus on whatever movie is playing.

He just falls asleep and dreams.

 

***

 

“I’ll ask you to be cautious with who you share the arc reactor with.” Dream-Coulson reminds him, sitting on the other end of Peter’s couch. “Someone close to you is using you. I won’t tell you who, why, or when things will come crashing down around you. But it will. And when it does, you call me.” The small phone rests heavy in Peter’s pocket still. It reminds him.

“But I don’t understand” Peter complains and feels himself shrinking into a child. Tiny. Small. Voice high pitched. “I don’t understand! I trust them… I trust them…”

“Then you’re making a mistake.”

 

***

 

He’s supposed to meet at the lab the following day, but Peter texts him and lets him know he won’t be coming. He stays in bed for a whole three days, watching from behind a cloud as Michelle moves around him, worried, stiff movement as she brings breaks, lunch, and dinner.

When he returns to the lab on Friday, his head is clear, and after a few good nights of sleep, things feel easier.

“I hope you don’t mind” Tony smiles at him as he enters the lab, “I had Jarvis produce the first version of the suit for you. After the success the other day I couldn’t help it. It’s not the gold titanium alloy, yet, Jarvis is working on that in my bigger workshop. It’s easier.”

Peter can understand that. What had just the week before been a hologram hovering between them, now stood tall and strong before him. Full metal.

Tony smirks, “You want to take it for a spin?”

Peter looks at Tony confused. “Right now?” Weren’t there rules they had to follow? Weren’t there things that needed to be tested first? Didn’t they have to make sure everything was in working order? There was a difference between a test flight in a controlled environment like the lab, and something as unpredictable and fatal as the outside world.

Tony nods all the same. Getting impatient. And really, Peter is too.

“Sure” Peter nods finally, “Didn’t someone once say you have to run before you walk?” Tony points at him with an approving look. That’s the spirit it says.

Together they make it to the control table, where Tony spends most of his time while Peter is testing stuff. “Now, there’s one thing we need to talk about first.” Peter feels his stomach drop. Imagines a worst-case scenario where Tony thinks it’s too dangerous for Peter to go out there, while he’s having his attack. But Tony says nothing in that regard. “You’ll need backup out there. Of course, I’ll be right here in the coms. But it’s a lot to control on your own.”

“I guess” Peter nods, “So, what are you suggesting?”

Tony pulls up a bar that Peter recognizes. The HUD that Jarvis had been asked to create. Not that Peter couldn’t have done it himself, but it gave them more lab time, so he didn’t complain.

“I add Jarvis to the system. Direct access to all of Stark servers, and any satellite system, ever created. You’ll be able to talk to him directly, and he can respond. Do simple tasks like picking up the phone or sending a text. However, he’ll also be able to talk full control of the suit, in case something goes wrong.” There it is. The closest Tony is to thinking about Peter's issue.

It felt almost fatherly, being allowed access to something Tony had worked on for so long. Something that, in a lot of ways, was a lot like Tony himself.

“That’s incredible. But… you didn’t have to.” Peter feels his heart flutter, and Tony pulls him into a soft, big hug. His arms folded around him, protecting him. “Thank you.”

They set up after that. Tony might not come out and say he’s worried, but his actions show it. Double checking the heart monitor and oxygen reader that is glued to Peter’s chest, just above the arc reactor. Double-check that Jarvis is ready to go on autopilot in case anything should happen. Even had Peter breathe pure oxygen for twenty minutes because it can help prevent oxygen starvation for a short while if his oxygen supply should fail.

And then they’re finally ready, and the suit is built up around his body. Piece by piece, screw by screw.

It’s dark at first, until Peter’s eyes slowly adjust. A moment later, Tony activates the HUD. Voice muffled and distant through the metal, “Engage Heads Up Display, and patch me into the coms channel.”

“Check.” Jarvis's voice rings out, and in the corner of Peter’s eye, he can see a log of everything said by Jarvis, Peter himself, and Tony.

A small picture of Tony appears above the log a moment later, lighting up with a green ring as Tony speaks, in the suit this time. “Important all preferences from the home interface.”

“Will do, sir.”

And sure enough, as Peter looks around Jarvis calibrates. Tells Peter what his eyes are looking at. Pulls up Peter’s text messages for Michelle when he looks at his phone for a few seconds and marks out a flight path when Peter looks out the windows. It tells him about the half-finished car in Tony’s tiny lab, about Dum-E and Dum-U.

A mini-map of the city appears on the screen together with speed, temperature, power, and vitals.

His heart is beating faster than it should. From the anxiety of what’s to come. From anticipation.

“I have been fully uploaded, sir. The suit is online and ready, if Peter would like to take it for a trail around the city.”

“Let's do it!” Peter feels himself smiling, and the windows he’d been looking at open and form into a landing and take-off station. He takes a careful step out onto the glass, finds that it carries his weight easily enough, and then steps out fully.

He’s seen the world from above before. This view had been something he loved about Tony’s lab. But the removal of the glass, the ability to take one step and fall or fly, made it even better.

He hadn’t imagined it could get any better.

Then suddenly, he’s just flying. Under his power. He isn’t confined to the ground anymore. He doesn’t rely on a million-ton big plane to get him in the air. It’s all him, Jarvis, and Tony.

He cheers loudly. Can’t stop himself. Because he suddenly feels free. Free in a way he hadn’t, ever since that day, and that attack. He forgets about Coulson’s warning, Yinsen death, and destiny and Gala’s.

All of that is below him. Somewhere. While Peter is up here. Watching over his city.

Bathed in golden lights as the sun sets on the horizon, and the first stars glitter across the sky. Not above him anymore, but within him, in its weird way.

They’ve pushed the limits of what humans can do. Peter has survived things that should have been impossible, and yet, here he is. Cladded in a shield around his body, that won’t save him if he falls. But he won’t fall, because he’s safe. He won’t fall, because he’s finally able to breathe. He won’t fall, because Michelle and May are waiting somewhere below him.

“What’s the plan?” Tony’s voice filters through the suit, “Wanna go sightseeing?”

Peter shakes his head, “I think, I want to go higher. As high as we safely can.”

“Yeah? How is it handling?”

“Like a dream!” Peter smiles. Smiles. Because this was what he’d dreamt, wasn’t it? Flying across the world, with the ability to change things. To make things better.

Tony chuckles over the coms, clearly watching the cameras on the suit. “Jarvis, what do you say? Should we let the kid go higher?”

“The sky remains clear. It is safe to continue upwards.”

So, he does. Watches as the ground below becomes smaller and smaller. Human becomes the size of ants. He’d once wondered how autotunes felt having the coolest job in the world. Now he knows that it must be terrifying. Looking down and being reminded of your mortality. Your own, tiny size, being able to do nothing in the greater scheme of things.

“What’s SR-71’s record?” Aka the blackbird. The coolest, craziest plane, ever. A fighter jet. Reaching a top speed of Mach 3.2.

Jarvis pulls the number up on the screen and shows Peter where he is and where the Blackbird is. Shows the path. “The altitude record for fixed wing fight is 85000 feet, Peter.”

“Records are made to be broken!” Tony cheers over the coms. Sharing Peter’s excitement. So he keeps pushing. Keeps pushing. Keeps pushing.

“Peter…” Jarvis suddenly sounds worried. It makes Peter’s stomach drop as he listens to the AI speak. “There is a potentially fatal buildup of ice occurring.” It’s too late…

When you fly a plane, there’s something important about weight. If it shifts backward, you’ll stale. If it tips forward, you’ll crash nose-first into the ground. If there’s too much weight, you’ll never get off the ground. And if too much weight is added mid-flight, you’ll fall. You won’t maintain lift.

That is what happens when Peter pushes the suit to the very edge. The ice forms across the metal, and he’s sent crashing downwards. Falling out of the sky.

If that wasn’t enough, the HUD goes dead. Jarvis's voice glitches out. Tony’s voice disappears.

There’s something peaceful about falling. Being weightless. Accepting, that this… this is the ending. It’s the desert all over again. The thrill that he’s free, and the fear that he’s dead.

With Jarvis out, Peter has no choice but to deploy the flaps himself. Break the ice off. He reaches for a solid place, anywhere, he can get a grasp. Searches, searches, searches, until it clicks through the metal suit, the ice breaks off, and the rebooting screen appears before him.

The ground comes closer and closer, but Peter just closes his eyes. Allows gravity to take him.

Waits.

The sun has set by now. The city below is like stars.

A million, tiny stars.

His chest hurts. His heart is beating. His head is pounding. But he’s free. Free of everything that has been holding him down.

“-ter? Peter!” Tony’s voice comes suddenly, and with it, flight resumes. “Shit, kid? Are you with me? Please…” Peter has no idea how much Tony can see. How much Tony has seen?

He doesn’t care. “That was amazing! Woah!” He laughs.

Tony sounds annoyed and scared on the other end. Breathless. “Christ Pete. You just shaved ten years of my life. If I’m finding gray hairs tomorrow, it’s your fault!”

“Jarvis, engage autopilot. Bring us back” Peter asks, “Tony, that was amazing. You have to try it. It’s…, woah.”

“Another time kid, another time. First I’ve got a Gala to attend.”

“I’m sorry sir.” Jarvis buds in, “It would appear the Gold Tanium alloy version of the suit has been finished. Would either of you like to decide on colors?” A screen of the suit appears.

Peter and Tony both respond in red.

Notes:

I didn't plan on posting chapter 10 for another few days, but I just couldn't wait :P It got me so excited! I'm flying, mentally that is.

Also... I'm totally not working on outlining the rewrite of Iron man 2 already <3

Okay, I am. And I'm telling you, it's going to be a little bit crazy. But I also think you'll freaking love it. I'm thinking Living Lazer! I'm thinking proposals. I'm thinking *super soldier serum...*

Chapter 11: Slaughtered

Summary:

He can’t believe his own eyes. Tony wasn’t selling weapons anymore, these had to be formed before… before he’d been attacked before he’d been captured. There was no way- “When were these taken?”

Christine's eyes grow dark as she replies. “Yesterday.”

Michelle is already dressed by the time Peter makes it back to their apartment. Adrenaline still pumping through his body as he passes through the doors and stops in his tracks in shock. Before him stands Michelle, her curled, long hair, set up in a high bun, leaving only loose pieces to frame her face. Golden blush covers her cheekbones, and perfect eyeliner lays across her face. Her dress, then sun golden color, the masterpiece of a sunset covering her body. Flowing around her as she moves. She’s wonderful. She’s… she’s… “Waoh.”

She turns to him with a smile, a grin, reaching her eyes. “You’re late.”

“Sorry” Peter moves then. Drops his bag by the shoe rack and pulls her into a hug and a kiss before continuing into their bedroom. Pulls his dirty lab clothes off, piece by piece. “We did a proper flight test today, and MJ it was incredible. And Tony put Jarvis in the suit too!”

She hovers in the door, watching him as he finds a good pair of jeans and a black T-shirt. He pulls on a new blazer that Michelle had gotten her, and then his dress shoes.

Peter hasn’t ever liked dressing up, but he feels oddly comfortable now, standing before her. “You should have seen it. It’s…” A part of him is still flying above the city, looking down at his home.

“I never had any doubts you’d make it work,” Michelle chubs his cheek and pulls him into a kiss. Their lips pit together perfectly. Their noses brushed against each other. Michelle’s chest, leaning into his. He can feel her heartbeat against his. Feels every breath she takes. “We should get going.”

Peter takes her hand and guides her out of their apartment. Happy is waiting on the curb below, and Peter holds the door for her, helps her with her long dress, and takes care of her. Before he slides in next to her.

They drive through the city in mostly silence. Watching the wall pass by before them. The sun is long gone, and the apartment buildings almost look like a star sky.

“So…” Peter starts slowly, “What’s the actual reason you wanted to go?”

Michelle looks at him puzzled, “What do you mean Pete?”

He shrugs. “You just, this isn’t usually your thing. Right? I’m guessing there’s a goal with all this. The dress, the makeup. It’s not just for my sake, is it?”

“Guess I can’t hide it from you” Michelle chuckles and leans her head against his shoulder. Moves a little closer to him in the backseat. “Someone contacted me anonymously last week. She’d figured out that I study Journalism at ESU and said she had to talk to me. Well, talk to you. But couldn’t go to you directly.”

Peter sucks in a deep breath, trying to relax his heart as it speeds up. He can’t panic now. Can’t. “Any clue why she needs to talk to me? Or who she is?”

Michelle shrugs, “I’m guessing she’s a journalist, too. She sounded shocked on the phone. Seemed important enough.”

Happy pulls the car to a stop before the long stretch of red carpet that leads into the Manhattan Center, where the Gala was held.

He meets Peter’s eyes in the review mirror. “Want me to join you two? If you need someone who can step in, I don’t mind. It’s my job, even.” Peter hesitates. Feels Michelle's hand grasps his tightly. Begging for him to listen, to go in there, to hear whoever it is out. “I can also keep the car running, tell the others to be on guard for any suspicious activity, and be ready to go when you need it.”

“I…” Peter meets Michelle’s eyes, and shakes his head, “I’m sure it’s nothing. We’ll be fine, thanks Happy.”

Happy gives him a stiff nod, and a moment later someone opens the door for them and allows them to slip out of the car. Happy lingers at the curb for a second longer than he needs to, before driving off to find a parking space. Michelle and Peter start their walk hand in hand, towards the Gala.

There’s press everywhere outside. The camera points at guests as they come in their pretty dresses and high heels. Peter spots Pepper in a gown with a low back, in the pretties’ blue color as she makes her way inside next to Tony.

They don’t make it far before microphones are pushed up into their faces, cameras flash all around them, and people are asking questions so fast that Peter can’t respond to them.

“How are you feeling, what were the consequences of the attack?”

“Do you have PTSD?”

“Who’s this lovely lady? She must be very lucky to know you.”

It’s Michelle who steps before him as a shield. Meeting everyone's eyes, growled at them almost like a tiger. She’s always had a bite, never caring for stupid boys at stupid bars. She was also a year older than Peter. Strong, and protective. It came in handy now.

“Could you comment on what has been going on in your life lately?” Well, she can’t scare everyone off. A woman Peter has seen before, at the press conference manages to push forward, “Please, Mr. Parker. The public wants to know how you’re feeling.”

Michelle is about to push the woman away too, but Peter tightens his hold on her hand. A sign that she can relax. “I’ve been better” Truthfully Peter answers, “But, I’ve been given a great opportunity to work on some cool technology together with Tony. It doesn’t fix anything that happened, but there’s something about it that brings me a lot of you.” They don’t need to know about the adrenaline lingering in his body. How he’d fallen and fallen, how Jarvis had pumped him full of information.

“Rumors say you’re taking a medical leave for ESU, can you confirm this?” The woman asks.

Peter nods slowly, “That’s right. I’ve seen a lot in my life already, it was…” he shrugs, “It was bound to catch up with me sooner or later.”

“But you’re going back there, to finish later?”

“Definitely” Peter confirms, and then with Michelle's hand in his pushes forward, past the crowd waiting for him. Past people cheering his name, cheering that weapons are an issue, that Stark should go down. Past people giving him angry stares, shouts of anger reaching them both, claims of cheating, that the attack was fake, that Peter wasn’t hurt, wasn’t injured.

He ignores all of it and finally makes it to the building. Makes it inside.

The Manhattan Center was big. Very big. It had to be for Stark to host an event like this. Peter and Michelle had been there for, watching a concern a couple of years earlier. But they did so much more than that. They opened up their stages and studies for parties, and TV productions like America Got Talent. But also, events like New York Comic Con, and modeling stuff. All right there, in the Manhattan Center’s Hammerstein Ballroom.

When they reach the party, it’s already so crowded that it’s almost impossible to move. It doesn’t matter too much, a security guard spots Peter as he enters, and carefully guides him to one of the Balconies, only meant for high-end guests like Peter and Michelle.

Pepper and Tony are both already up there mingling with champagne in a glass and smiles on their faces.

A server hands Michelle and Peter glasses too, which they nurse and sip at as they walk around.

Tony brightens when he sees them, “Peter, Michelle!” he greets them with half-hugs. “I’m so glad you two could come. What a wonderful surprise.” It isn’t, Peter knows. Tony had offered to have Happy drive them because Tony could drive himself. Had even offered to buy Peter a suit if he needed one. “You two look amazing, young, it’s great.”

Rhodey joins them a few moments later. With a smile on his face, he greets them too.

“If you’ll excuse me” Tony does a fancy little bow as if they were royalty and greets the next guest. A business partner maybe.

Peter and Michelle find a spot close to a wall, where they can hover. Watching the people as they walk about. A few make a point of greeting them, offering Peter jobs, or wishing him a speedy recovery. But mostly, nobody cares about two college students drinking champagne in the corner.

Not until one of the servers comes with more champagne and comments, “A woman wishes to speak with them, Mr. Parker.” This is it. This has to be Michelle’s contact. “If you’ll follow me?”

Peter looks to Michelle who takes another glass of champagne and nods. Gives him the go-ahead.

Then he follows the server down the stairs, and down to one of the bars on the main floor. He spots Tony talking to a journalist off to the side, “Weapons manufacturing is only a small part of what Stark Industries is all about, and our partnership with the fire and rescue community proves this. In the future, that will be part of the main focuses at the company.” There’s a whisky in his hand, but his words ring truthfully in Peter’s ears are they pass them.

“Peter Parker?” One of the people are the bar steps away. A woman with blond hair, brushing across her shoulder. A dark dress fitting nicely against her body. “Fancy seeing you here.” The server disappears then, and Peter knows whoever she is, is Michelle’s contact.

He doesn’t remember her name, but he’s seen her face before. Doing interviews with high-end people.

They greet each other now like old friends, but it’s all faced.

“Names Christine.” She smiles, “Christine Everhart. Sorry about the sneaking about, but I had to talk to you.”

“Yeah, yeah of course” Peter nods. His head feels sweaty. She knows something, there’s a serious look on her face that makes Peter’s stomach twist. He regrets the champagne now. The excitement of the first flight evaporates, replaced by anxiety. Once more remembering Coulson’s warning. “Maybe we could find a less, public space?”

She nods in agreement. The two walk together, into a small corridor off the side of the main ballroom. There are music studies further down the hall, sound booths, and instruments. “What do you know about Stark Industries' involvement in the latest atrocity?”

“Atrocity?” He’s confused, “What are you talking about, exactly?”

Cristine face falls in shock, in worry. “You don’t know.” She states. From her purse, she pulls a handful of papers. “A few weeks ago, Tony Stark went out publicly, claiming he’d shot down weapons productions of Stark industries. At the same time, you signed a contract with the company.”

“That’s right. We’ve been working on a great new project involving self-sustaining, clean energy.” Peter comments.

She purses her lip. Bits it carefully. Hesitates before handing the pictures over. “It’s a town called Gulmire. It’s not too far from where you were captured. One of their own, Ho Yinsen was kidnapped from there weeks before the attack on you.”

Peter studies the photos. Military people, weapons, the ten rings. Dead people are littering the ground and dead animals. Blood everywhere. Buildings crumbling. In another three people are carrying a create of Stark Industries weapons off a plane, two of the people have bags over their heads, but the last one is a face Peter knows… the man who wanted him to build a weapon.

A man, who was willing to ill home to get it.

Another one of the create of up close, now in strange. Stark XMGM-287. LOT GO739-07-B-0031.

The next is a picture of Jericho, the missile system Peter had seen demonstrated that day. The one the Ten Rings had wanted him to build, while he was in the dark, cold, cave.

And then the last picture. It makes him stop. His brain stops working. It’s a gun, more sophisticated than anything Peter has ever seen. And right there, in its base, is an arc reactor.

He can’t believe his own eyes. Tony wasn’t selling weapons anymore, these had to be formed before… before he’d been attacked before he’d been captured. There was no way- “When were these taken?”

Christine's eyes grow dark as she replies. “Yesterday.”

“I’ve been working personally with Tony” Peter comments, more to himself than to Christine. “He… he hasn’t approved any shipments.” But he must have because there’s an arc reactor. How many people had access to those?

Peter, sure. Tony. And Otto. There weren’t a lot of options.

“His company did” She shrugs. “Look, kid, I don’t know what you and Stark had been working on, I just thought you should hear it from me before I write an article about it.” Peter hears Coulson’s warning echoing in his head. Feels the phone heavy in his back pocket.

If I’ve learned one thing during my time with Shield, it would be that you can’t always trust the people closest to you. Sometimes people’s intentions change over time.

He takes a deep breath and tries to keep himself steady. It isn’t real. There’s no way that it’s real. But there, on the side of the crate, on the side of the missile, is Tony’s name. Just like there always is. Just, like there had on the bomb which shrapnel would forever be in his chest.

Peter swallows. Tries to fight the anger off as it builds, but he can’t. He trusted Tony. He trusted him, despite everything… “You’re sure these are real?”

“One of my guys took these photos,” She nods stiffly, “They’re as real as they get.”

His hands clenched around the pictures. Feels their sharp edge, digging into the skin of his palms. “Let me talk to Tony before you do anything, okay? I- Please?”

“Sure,” She nods, “Jones has my number. If I haven’t heard anything within the week, I’m running the story as it is right now. If you can give me something, anything, I’ll listen. And don’t worry. Whatever this is, it isn’t your fault.”

But it was… the arc reactor was his work. His creation… if he had somehow triggered the production of weapons with an Arc Reactor? That would always be his fault.

But I’ll ask you to be cautious with who you share the arc reactor with.

 

***

 

He searches for Tony everywhere. On the balcony, where he says goodbye to Rhodey he has to go off to work. Pepper doesn’t know where Tony is. Nobody knows, and so, before Peter knows it he’s searching outside the building. In the crowd of people, coming to and from the event.

Sure enough, at the front steps he’s standing, drink in hand. His eyes are glossy, his words slurred.

“Tony!” Peter pushes towards him. Forces the photos into his hands. “What the fuck is this?”

Tony looks at them, but it feels more like stares right through them as he suddenly sobers up. “Where-“ he meets Peter’s eyes, “Where did these come from?”

“A journalist who did a big thing about you what, four? Five months ago? Just before the attack.” Peter swallows. “Tell me you aren’t still selling weapons. Tell me, that you aren’t using the arc reactor for “ the words get stuck in his throat.

Who else would it be?

Who else could it be?

“Of course not, you know I wouldn’t. I told you, we’re on the same side in all this. I wanted to change the company for the better.” Tony keeps staring at the photos, “They have to be fake. This can’t happen-“

“You’re the only other person with access to the arc reactor technology, Tony…” The press is watching them. Pictures flashing. “If… if you’re…”

“I’m not.” Tony looks at him. Serious.

Peter swallows. Feels his voice crack. “Then who is?” he demands. “Is Stark Industries double-dealing under the table? Is that how they got the weapons to attack the car in the first place? Was that why I had to sit in that car? Huh? Remember what you told me that day, Tony? ‘That project always was just a proof of concept. You can’t make it smaller.’ Was that true? Was that what you thought? Or was that to cover your ass when you stole my project because I was dead?”

He realizes then he can’t trust a single word Tony says.

Peter doesn’t waste a moment letting the man defend himself and doesn’t look back as he pushes through the press and the people watching them. He needs out. Needs to breathe. Needs- Needs to see it for himself.

Peter needs to know.

“Yinsen…” Peter stresses, feeling a lump in his throat. “Yinsen, please…” Something was wrong.

After a long second the green bar appears on the laptop screen and Yinsen meets his eyes. He moves to Peter, his hand brushing against Peter’s cheeks. “Peter… you have to listen to me, okay?” Peter nods silently. “You were never supposed to be here Peter, you've been removed from your path. Your destiny. You must find your way back to it. Because the person you were almost meant to become.”

“Yinsen…” His voice breaks.

“Don’t cry, I’ll buy us the time you need to get out. It will be okay. Okay?” Peter swallows and can’t find words. “Whatever happens, don’t look back. Don’t waste it. I’ll be just fine. I promise.”

Notes:

Woah, that was a chapter! Damn. I just, got in the flow, and boom... 3k words. Ready for posting.

I'm having a blast!

Are you having a blast too?

Good new, btw. I've finished outlining the rewrite to Iron man 2, which is pretty crazy too. So I'll be able to go straight from this, to the next part of the series. So if you haven't yet, go follow the series here:

https://archiveofourown.org/series/3708646

Chapter 12: Warning

Summary:

“I don’t think it is either…” Otto nods slowly. When he looks up at Peter, his eyes are dark again, like they had been that night. His voice filled with anger, so suddenly, that Peter took a step backward, falling against the table. “I think, you need to be very careful what you do next, Peter.”

Athony “Tony” Stark was known as the Marchen of Death.

Peter had known that going into his partnership with the older man. Because he’d thought, he’d hoped really, that there where something good hidden inside everyone. That the Stark board of directors had been wrong, and that Tony hadn’t sold weapons to terrorists.

The injunction hadn’t gone through. Obadiah Stane remained at his Hawaii holiday resort, and Peter had worked in Tony’s lab.

If he could go back in time and talk to his younger self, he’d tell him to stick with Otto. That nobody but them, would ever be allowed close to the arc reactor technology. He’d say no thanks to Vibranium and funding, he’d say no thanks for competition and champagne. He’d never go to that damned demonstration, Jasen would be alive, Yinsen would be alive, and Peter's chest wouldn’t be hurting all the time, and his brain wouldn’t be riddled with PTSD. He’d stick with Otto and change the world for the better.

Healing it, one invention at a time.

Ben would be alive because Peter would have taken them to another subway station. Ben would be alive, because Peter never asked for rainbow-colored ice cream at Central Park, never told him about ESU, and never talked about responsibilities… because Peter would give everything up, to be with Ben again.

To forget about the blood coloring his seventeen-year-old hands…

“Peter, you appear to be in distress. Would you like for me to contact Mr. Stark?”

Peter sighs, pulled back to reality as Jarvis speaks. The truth was, Peter had yet to invent time travel, so he’d do none of that. Right now, all he could do… was figure things out for himself.

Lucky for him, Tony had gotten the suit brought to New York as soon as it was done fabricating. It has been as easy as stepping into that building, scanning his Stark Industries badge, letting the private elevator take him up, and stepping inside the suit.

No need for plane tickets, or security details. Nop! Peter could go wherever he wanted, whenever he wanted. Because Peter could fly, and tonight, apparently that meant flying right into the nest of a group of terrorists that he tried to kill him less than two months earlier.

“Peter? Would you like for me to “

“No thanks Jarvis” He responds this time. “But, uh, could you contact Michelle Jones Watson for me?”

“Right away, sir.”

Michelle’s contact info appears on the display a moment later, a picture of her and Peter that he used for her contacts on his phone with it. Staring back at him. “Peter? Where are you? What happened? The press is going crazy, and Stark is like, really drunk. Are you okay?”

“Press?” Peter swallows, “How much did they see?”

“Just you and Tony fighting outside the Gala. Pete… what in the world happened out there?” Michelle’s voice echoes worriedly through the suit coms system.

“Jarvis, send a copy of the photos to MJ” he orders, “Have you gotten them?”

There’s a short break before Michelle confirms. “Yeah, I’ve got them. Oh shit, is that… are those Stark Weapons with the arc reactor?”

“Sure hell seems like it” Peter agrees. Happy that he isn’t the only one who sees it. “Tony claimed it wasn’t him, but I’m going down there. I need to know the truth, no matter the cost. If I’ve caused this, if my tech is…” he shakes his head, “It’s my responsibility.”

“Didn’t you just finish the suit? Maybe wait, or, call someone who can help you-“

Michelle is an important part of Peter’s life. Has been since their very first meeting. A journalist unlike any other, observant, amazing, perfect. “MJ…” Peter sighs, “I need you to do some digging. I want to know if you can find anything on these sales.”

“Alright. Keep me posted, please?”

“I promise.” The call ends a moment later. Michelle’s face disappears. “Jarvis, could you… uh. Could you maybe make it seem like there’s a test flight going on in the area? It might be ugly if someone spots the suit and chooses to attack.”

Jarvis pulls up a list of data and runs through it before he confirms. “General Rhodes has been informed of a test flight of the Mark 2 suit. Anonymous pilot. You are safe, Peter.”

“Thanks, Jarvis.”

 

***

 

The flight is long and uncomfortable, but he reaches the area safely. Only to find the little town, dusty, covered in layers of desert sand, being attacked by the very same people who’d attacked him. Bullets flying through the air, kids and women covering behind buildings and hiding in houses, hoping, praying, that they won’t be found. But they will. The ten rings aren’t about to leave, because they’ve turned over every rock in that town. Before every life in that town has been destroyed, blown into pieces, or shot through their head.

Peter liked to think that he had an actual plan. That he’d go to the town, that he’d watch from a distance, have Jarvis run a scan to confirm whether or not the tech was Starks or not…

Then…

And then…

Well, Peter hadn’t had a plan for what to do next. Wasn’t even sure he trusted Jarvis to confirm anything for him. Had Tony agreed to build the suit, because it could be used as a weapon? The next generation of soldiers…?

In history class back in high school Peter had heard about Howard Stark, creating a future, that had never reached them. A drug supposed to make super soldiers but wasn’t ever tested. Replaced by a hammer and a god of thunder, a human becoming a god, and a god becoming human.

Here’s had been real once. Ages ago… used as a tool by the military. Was that what Tony wanted too?

Instead, Peter scraps the plan and enters the city. He’s safe under layers of metal. “Peter I would recommend staying out of the line of fire-“

“Not now Jarvis” Peter snaps. Let his anger at Tony affect him. Tony had betrayed him… after he’d opened up about Ben after he’d… “I’m not letting innocent people get hurt.”

Peter had the power to do something good, so he would. Just like Ben had done that day, saving that girl. Just like Ben had always taught him. Weapons might create more problems than they solve, but with great power, there will always come great responsibility. Peter was one person, alone, and yet he knew he could take these guys down. Wouldn’t that help people? Would that prove that weapons used with good intentions, by good people, were good?

As he pulls the first gun out of a man’s hands, he remembers Ben pulling his service weapon at the guy, holding onto that little girl. Remember that it had escalated things, but… it had also saved her.

Repulser blasts fill the air like it had in the lab. Bright beams of light send people flying against walls and the ground. Sends people tumbling and grunting.

Their numbers are cut in half in mere seconds, and the tough scene presents itself.

Women, kids, and men were held at gunpoint in that big crowd. Kids cry as they hold their parents’ hands tightly in their own. Glistering small pearls of emotions falling down their cheeks. “Jarvis?”

“Yes, Peter?”

“Can you tell who the ten rings are?” Peter scans the group. Watches as Jarvis pulls up blue circles around them, name, age, history. The suit’s second weapons system, something Tony had come up with, appears from the shoulders. Civilians get a white light, the others a red, and suddenly a bullet flies. Hitting their targets with precision.

The man crumbles to the ground, and the kids are crying for real, and the months are thanking them, and the man is praising him. Jarvis provides translation on the edge of Peter’s vision. “Thank you, sir, thank you, thank you.”

Then he scans again. Looks for the one missing piece. A cowered, hiding behind a brick wall that doesn’t belong to him. That he’d been attempting to destroy moments earlier.

If he leaves the man to die at the hands of those people… nobody has to know but him.

 

***

 

He finds the Jericho missile and arc reactor weapons. He does a full scan of it, but Jarvis is surprisingly, unable to determine their origin. “I’m sorry Peter.” He doesn’t have to. Peter might hate weapons, but he’s spent enough time dismantling them in the cave to get palladium, that he could probably figure it out himself.

He takes what he can carry with him, what remains he blows to pieces.

 

***

 

“Hey!” Peter feels himself grinning as Rhodey’s face appears on the display. “How may I help you, General?”

“Hi, Peter. Question, we’ve got a weapons depot that was just blown up a few clicks from where you were being held captive. Was that you? Or… that thing? That’s your and Tony’s project. We got the call about the test flight, but I’d been expecting it to be bigger.”

Peter frowns, “How do you know what it looks like?”

“Two of our fighter jets are in the air” Rhodey informs him. But he doesn’t sound angry, he sounds excited. Sounds like Peter feels when he’s flying. “If you need more test pilots, I volunteer.”

“Noted!” Peter chuckles, “What do you think?”

“What do I think? Well, first, I hope that isn’t you in there…” Peter sighs and tells Rhodey that it’s not. He doesn’t know who to trust anymore. Tony had seemed so nice, and yet… “Otherwise? To me, this looks like the future.”

 

***

 

He doesn’t go back to Tony’s lab to return the suit, though maybe he should. With the suit there, Jarvis can track him and give information straight to Tony. When the man becomes sober enough to function again.

Peter’s name went viral after their shooting match in front of the Manhattan Center, and while nobody knew exactly what was said, it was clear that the tension between the two where heavy.

Instead, he goes to Otto’s lab. Leaving the suit on the roof, where nobody will see it right away.

“Ah, Peter!” Otto smiles when Peter enters, “Didn’t know you’d be coming today. Come in, come in. I was just about to run an official test with the reactor.”

The table is set, the arc reactor resting in its stand, connected to the black carbon fiber arm. A billion tiny lights flow from under the shell of it. The camera’s rolling as the desk, screens are recording. All scientists did this. Recording wrote reports – even if Jarvis did that for Tony – made sure everything was documented.

If you make a breakthrough in science, you need to be able to repeat it.

Peter steps up to the table next to his professor, but it isn’t Otto who takes control of the arm. Instead, his mentor hands Peter the control. It’s smooth plastic resting in its hands. “Are you sure about this?”

Otto nods with a big smile, “Peter, one day I won’t be here to finish the project. You’ll do it all on your own. You’ve come so far from that little boy entering my classroom for the first time.”

“Young adult” Peter corrects with a grin before he carefully tries moving the arm. Feels different with the fully functional arc reactor giving its power to it. As it runs through every tiny, little cable, Peter can almost see it glowing behind the red green, and blue wires.

Otto’s eyes linger on the arm. Shining like a child’s eyes do, looking up at buildings decorated by Christmas lights, and trees and presents.

The arm moves. Smoothly it responds to each of Peter’s inputs in milliseconds. “The response time is immaculate” Otto comments, as Peter moves the arm to grasp a bottle of water that rests on the table. Carefully he purrs water into two lab cups. One a pale blue, and one a sharp yellow. In big black letters, A.I.M is written on the side.

He hands one cup - the yellow one – to Otto. The other he lifts with the mechanical arm and moves to a cheer. Just a few months ago they’d done the same, in celebration. In victory.

“I’m guessing you accept AIM’s offer” Peter nods to the room around them. The lab remains a lab, Otto’s weird, messy home. But new things are littering the place, boxes and projects that have A.I-M written all over them.

His professor smiles and nods, before lowering the cup to the table. “They were very impressed Peter, and not only has their funding sped up the project… but has allowed me to make the prototype of the neuron interface that will allow these people to control their prosthetics.”

The neuron interface was something that hadn’t been sure about before. Something that seemed so far away that Peter hadn’t dared to mention it.

“Peter, I’d like to apologize for how I acted a few weeks ago.” Otto suddenly turns serious. Peter remembers the fear he’d felt, seeing his mentor on the floor. Unresponsive. “I haven’t been entirely honest with you. I, I suffer from a degenerative neurological condition.” He shakes his head. Peter swallows hard. “Probably caused by overexposure to toxic chemicals in my… reckless youth.”

“When you said I’d be the one to finish the project…” Peter hesitates.

Otto shrugs, a soft smile on his face. “There is no cure, Peter. In a few months, I’ll be, nothing more than a brain inside a useless body. Like a computer, running the calculation, but being unable to make them become anything more than a dream…”

“You’ll…” Peter feels his brain stop working. Feels his body give in. The only person he could trust was dying. His body breaking down… “You’ll be unable to test the implant.”

“Most likely. It could worsen my condition.” Otto takes a moment to collect himself before meeting Peter’s eyes again. “Now, what brought you here today? I heard about the fight with you and Tony, I was under the assumption that the two of you were doing great things together.”

Otto… always able to tell exactly what Peter was thinking.

“It was, brought to my attention that someone had been creating weapons using the arc reactor technology.” Peter sighs. Feels his heart beat faster and faster. Feels the stress of everything catching up with his body. He’s as useless as Otto. The man looks at him with concern. Worry. Confusion. “There are two people with access to my tech. You and… Tony.”

“You don’t truly believe that he would do that. Do you?”

Peter shrugs, “Who else would it be, doc? You don’t make weapons, you’re the reason I’ve succeeded with my project. You’re changing the world for the better.”

“He gave up everything for you Peter. Allowed you into his lab, are you-“

“So did you” Peter nudges his professor, “And it’s not like I’m trusting that fact blindly. Otto. I… I’ve gotten my hands on some of the tech. Some of the weapon’s pieces. Hopefully, I can identify the creator, based on the work.”

Otto studies it for a moment and takes it from Peter’s hands.

Something Peter had always loved about Otto’s classes, was his love for getting hands-on experience with different technology, And, when possible, sharing that with his students. Having a wide range of information, of knowledge to pull from, would make creating things, building things, much easier later on.

That’s part of the reason, Peter had so easily adapted in that cave. Yinsen, of course, is a great help too.

Watching over Otto’s shoulder, studying the technology as they do a full teardown down is fascinating. Throwing about ideas and thoughts that might explain design choices.

“Whoever made this, it’s with a palladium core,” Otto comments at the end, standing with the dismantled copycat arc reactor in his hand. “We’re using Vibranium.”

Peter nods slowly. That wasn’t the only thing. He’s seen how awesome Tony’s tech could be, not just in weapons, but for the suit too. Holo-tables, AI drive bots. They were often advanced beyond their time, just like the mini arc reactor was.

That wasn’t what he was seeing here, though. This was functional, very much so. Just as well as Tony’s… but somehow, simpler.

As if they hadn’t thought about it the same way Tony had.

And maybe that was because Tony hadn’t built those weapons…

There’d been a lot of talk when Peter first returned. People wanted to force Tony out of Stark Industries and have Obadiah back in the CEO chair. Plenty of employees who wanted to see weapons be built… “It isn’t Tony’s tech” Peter settles on in the end.

“I don’t think it is either…” Otto nods slowly. When he looks up at Peter, his eyes are dark again, like they had been that night. His voice filled with anger, so suddenly, that Peter took a step backward, falling against the table. “I think, you need to be very careful what you do next, Peter.”

Notes:

Sorry it's late. I've been sick.

Chapter 13: Forgiveness

Summary:

“You’re bleeding.” Tony comments, a frown on his face. “Jarvis call me, said you were injured. Where were you? What-“ Tony shakes his head and drags Peter off towards a lab table. Clears it for Peter to sit on.

“I’m fine” Peter insists, “I wasn’t injured.”

Tony shakes his head, already pulling out a medical kit from the lab’s emergency storage. Folding it out and grabbing the needed tools to get started.

Peter had to agree with Otto on that. Knowing what the arc reactor technology could do, how it hurt people, what someone might do to get their hands on it… Coulson’s creepy conversation the day he agreed the join Stark Industries. Peter had to be careful, otherwise, he might as well have asked Yinsen to take his place in the suit and be dead in a cave now.

He still carried the phone on him. It was old and durable, heavy in his back pocket. But he barely noticed it anymore. He’d gotten used to it. He hadn’t charged it, either. Trusting that it would just, magically turn on when he needed it.

Before leaving Otto’s lab, Peter had stared at it. Sitting at the edge of a rooftop, the suit stood tall behind him. Fingers squeezed around the phone tightly.

Thinking.

Dreaming.

Flying high above the desert sand, helping people. Saving people. Protecting people.

Yinsen had told him, that he needed to find his way back to his path. Peter hadn’t ever really understood it, what was his path? He hadn’t been doing anything existing before getting captured, and if Yinsen had been talking about the reactor, then Peter already found his way back. Only, if that was the case, then why did he keep having nightmares? Why did it feel like his whole life was crumbling around him with each step he took?

In the end, he flies back to the tower. I hope to be alone but hope for Tony to be waiting at the window too. Hoping. Waiting. Hoping. Dreaming. Thinking. Living.

Tony isn’t at the window when Peter lands on the platform that Jarvis opens for him. However, Tony is in the lab. Stumbling forward to pull Peter into a hug the second the suit is opened and Peter comes out. “You’re bleeding.” Tony comments, a frown on his face. “Jarvis call me, said you were injured. Where were you? What-“ Tony shakes his head and drags Peter off towards a lab table. Clears it for Peter to sit on.

“I’m fine” Peter insists, “I wasn’t injured.”

Tony shakes his head, already pulling out a medical kit from the lab’s emergency storage. Folding it out and grabbing the needed tools to get started.

Before him Jarvis activates a holo screen, showing the status of the armor. Of it’s pilot, Peter. Red marks appear down his shoulder and arm, and a yellow one hovers over his head. Well, the tiny, non-detailed, holo version of him. “Peter, it would appear you were injured during your fighting and the following explosion. The injuries, however, do not appear to be fatal.”

The holo is replaced by a live video recording from Jarvis camera’s, and sure enough, the sleeve of the armor under the suit is torn and blood is flowing slowly down his upper arm.

It had already clogged before but must have been reopened during the flight from Otto’s lab.

He wonders shortly why the other scientist hadn’t commented on it but brushes it away. Otto had always been amazing at keeping his students safe in whatever way he could. Being a father figure to many, treating their wounds like Tony was doing for Peter now. But that lab time had been weird and emotional.

Otto was dying. Otto was sick. And he hadn’t told Peter about it- and-

And-

And he’d asked Peter to finish his research.

“Oh…” Peter comments a moment later, allowing Tony to carefully remove the sleeve and clean the wound.

The man doesn’t meet his eyes for a long time. Focused on the blood instead. About what he could control, instead of what he couldn’t. But when he’s done, and Peter still isn’t talking, Tony looks at him worried, and sad. “I’m sorry, kid. About last night. I was drunk, I should have listened to you.”

And, well. That wasn’t what Peter had been expecting. Truth was, Peter had been in the wrong. He’d thought he knew all the facts when had hadn’t. The pictures didn’t tell anyone shit, only solid proof. The palladium core, the simplified tech, the

Peter shakes his head. Brushing the apology off. “No, no. I’m sorry Tony, I shouldn’t have said that.”

He gestures in the air for Jarvis to pull up the tech scan he’d done on the roof. Jarvis responds immediately, pulling up the fake reactor and power board.

“You went to find it?” Tony studies the holo with a shocked expression on his face but doesn’t blame Peter. Don’t tell him it was reckless and stupid, even if maybe, he should. Pack him in a Hello Kitty t-shirt and sweatpants and put him to bed in the guestroom upstairs in the penthouse. The guestroom that had slowly become Peter’s over the past month.

“It’s not yours,” Peter says in the end, “It’s a good copy though. Uses palladium.”

“Any idea whose tech it might be then?” Tony asks, taking in the full picture that hovers between them. “Any indicators.”

Peter slips down the table and rotates the reactor in the air, then shrugs. “I guess… I just…” he bites his lip. Doesn’t want to say it out loud. Doesn’t want to make his thoughts real.

“Peter?” Tony grasps his shoulder. Reaching for him, grounding him, like during another flashback.

“Otto recently got offered funding from a company called A.I.M. Advanced Idea Mechanics. He took the offer, needed it if he wanted to move on… the arc reactor is supposed to be on a secure server but…” But you couldn’t always trust that was enough.

Tony frowns slightly, “A.I.M? Aren’t they owned by Adrienne something?”

Peter shrugs. He knows very little about the company, just that they’d been very interested in Otto’s work now, even if they hadn’t before.

It wouldn’t be hard for A.I.M. to get onto Otto’s servers if they had met in person. And they had, Peter suddenly remembers. The night Peter found Otto passed out.

It was the only explanation. It wasn’t Tony, it wasn’t Otto… so, A.I.M. Easy as that. It explained the use of palladium too. There were very few people who knew about the upgraded reactor specs, it wasn’t written down anywhere but in Jarvis's system. And even if it had been, Vibranum was still incredibly hard to get hold of.

Peter only had access to it Thanks to Tony. Otto didn’t have access to it either.

Wakanda was careful.

Like Peter should be.

“So, we’re thinking they might have…” Peter nods at Tony’s words. Feeling himself growing tired. Dizzy. The night’s events and early morning finally caught up with him. Feels Tony’s grounding hand, growing into a tight, steadying, hold. “Pete?”

“I don’t know what to do…” Peter confess. Feeling Coulson’s phone in his pocket. The warning words. The sight of Yinsen, dead, gone. Ben… Had he ever done anything right? Was this Karma coming back at him, a reminder that what he wanted to do, wasn’t possible? Make the world a better place… that’s what he’d promised Ben he’d do. And here he was, his tech used for weapons of mass destruction.

Tony takes a long, long moment to answer. A beat to long. “Who do we know is on our side?”

 

***

 

“XMGM-287. LOT GO739-07-B-0031” Peter repeats the serial number printed on the board into the phone once more. Michelle hums on the other end in response. “You got that?”

“I’ve got it” she confirms.

Peter pitches his nose, trying to remember how to breath. How to function. “You won’t do anything stupid, right? Just, dig up whatever information you can on A.I.M and forward it to Jarvis as soon as you can.”

Michelle snorts over the phone, “Peter, let me do my job. I’ll call you back as soon as I’ve got something.”

 

***

 

“Rhodey listen-“ Tony talks into the phone. Peter watches are he paces through the lab. “The test flight revealed something fucking bad. If you guys are hit by this weapon- No. No, I didn’t make it, someone else did. Just- It’s dangerous, okay? We need info on it but- Yes. Yes. Okay.”

Tony turns to him a moment later letting the phone drop to the messy workbench.

Peter tilts his head, studying the man. “So, is Rhodey in?”

“Probably” Tony shrugs, “You sure we shouldn’t tell him about you being in that suit?”

“Yeah, I’m sure. I trust him, I just-“

“Need to be sure?” Peter nods.

 

***

 

“Agent Coulson speaking. Peter, is everything alright?” Coulson’s voice is surprisingly crips through the old phone.

Peter takes a deep breath, “Uh… remember what you told me during the debrief thing? That someone might be going after the arc reactor technology?”

“I do remember that, yes.”

“Well… uhm. Somebody did.”

Notes:

I love this story, I really do. I just... feeling a little burnt out. I'll finish it, and I have so much more for this series, but I'll put some of my focus over into another longfic for a little while. Hopefully posting the first chapter for it this week. It's a prequel to Peter on Ice! So if you like Peter Parker, go read it!

Chapter 14: Dawn

Summary:

The man nods. “Mr. Parker. You’ve become part of a bigger universe. You just don’t know it yet.”

“Who are you?” Peter asks carefully.

“Nick Fury.” The man responds. “Director of SHIELD. I’m here to talk to you about the Avengers Initiative.”

 

Peter Parker will return in…

“From The Grave Beyond”

Peter knew on some level, that SHIELD as they called themselves, where something bigger. Hidden away from the eyes of the public, they worked to better the same world that Peter and Tony wanted to better. He didn’t know how they did it. Wasn’t even sure it mattered. Because the second he makes the call, it takes less than fifteen minutes for Coulson to show. A whole team behind his back. Ready to help?

Nobody knows what they’re looking for right then. It was possible for any lab on the planet, to have discovered the arc reactor technology. Bits and pieces of it had been revealed when Peter won the grant from the September Foundation, people needed to know where the money was going. And the arc reactor project had been a big thing at Stark Industries for a while now. Even if it had yet to leave Tony’s big lab at the top of the tower, people knew it was coming.

It wasn’t like Peter had hidden when he moved through the lobby. It wasn’t like people hadn’t seen him and Michelle at the gala. It wasn’t like people had seen Happy drop him off.

But nobody ever talked about it out loud.

So, anyone could have pieced things together and created a version of the arc reactor. Put them into weapons and shipped them off to a group of terrorists. The same terrorist, who had tried to make Peter build them a missile.

“Pete?” Tony’s hand comes to rest on his shoulder. Almost makes him jump at the sudden touch. “Sorry…” Tony says softly. “I just asked if you’d heard from Michelle yet. It’s been a few hours.”

Peter shakes his head, staring down at the phone in his hand. Notifications are still empty. It took everything he had not to make the call right then, to hear her voice. “She’s… working on it.”

Tony just nods softly.

For a while, they both stand there, before the massive lab windows. Watching the moon above the city, Peter can’t help but remember that he’d been able to see the stars the night he escaped. The night when Rhodey found him in the desert.

Agents move around behind them, setting up computers and digging through the internet. It seems like such a small team, but Coulson assures that a larger team is working in a different location. At their primary base of operation. Says to look up, but nothing’s up there.

“Not to be pessimistic,” Tony says slowly. “But if she’s as good at digging up information as you make it sound, maybe she’s in trouble.”

Peter blinks confused for Tony. Stars at him for a long moment, as he takes in those words.

Maybe, she’s in trouble.

It wasn’t like Peter hadn’t thought about that. He just didn’t want to consider the kind of danger that Michelle could be in, because of the tech Peter had created. How could he have been so stupid? Of course, a self-sustaining energy source was gonna be useful for weapon production… He should have seen it coming. Shouldn’t have been caught off guard by a press member, handing him photos, and telling him that Stark Industries were double-dealing.

She’d been wrong then, of course. But Peter should have known.

He doesn’t hesitate anymore, unlocking the phone with a single swipe. Pulls up Michelle’s contact, and calls. Hears the beeps over the line, waiting. Hoping. “You’ve reached the voice mail of Michelle Jones… Leave a message after the tone.”

“Dammit,” Peter mumbles under his breath as he tries again. But is once more thrown to voicemail.

“Not picking up?” Tony asks with a deep frown.

Peter stares at the phone screen, hoping to see Michelle’s name appear in a return call. Hoping to hear her say that she’d been showering, or distracted, or- He bit his lip. Sighs. He shows the phone in his pocket.

He glances around the room, at SHIELD agents typing away on keyboards. Lines of codes being broken. Tracking the manufacturing of the weapons that had been created.

Coulson knew what he was doing. Knew every step to take, to stop this before it ended in a disaster. Knowing that, Peter spins on his heels and heads for the area in Tony’s lab where they worked on the suit. It stands there, discarded from Peter’s late-night entrance earlier. The gold and red shine in the darkness, a contract with the dim world beyond the windows.

Tony’s hands grasp around Peter’s wrist hard, pulling him to a stop. “Hey. Hey! Kid, stop. Take a deep breath dammit. You’re hyperventilating.” A break. “Is this another flashback?”

“No,” Peter says sternly, pulling from Tony’s grasp and into the open suit. It closes around him with loud metallic clangs.

The paint job needs to be redone after Peter’s flight into a military zone. But that can wait.

“I need to check on MJ.” Peter insists, his voice is metallic as the helmet closes around his face. “She could be in danger, Tony.”

Tony gives a stiff nod. “Call me when you find her.” He asks, before turning to Coulson’s team and talking with them. Helping them out. Barking out orders to Jarvis. But Peter is already activating the flight platform, watching the window open for him. And soon he’s in the air, flying towards Michelle and his apartment.

 

***

 

Peter lands the suit on the building’s rooftop. He can’t see the tower from here, hidden behind buildings. He rushes towards the rooftop entrance and takes the steps down the stairs double time. Every thud echoes through the stairwell and bounces between the empty, pale, walls.

When he reaches their apartment door, he’s already pulling his keys out of his pocket. Forcing them into the lock, ready to twist, to turn.

But before he can, the door clicks open on its own.

It hadn’t been locked.

A shiver runs down Peter’s spine, as he pushes the door open further. Using the flashlight in his phone to lead the way as he makes it inside. Through the entrance, and into the kitchen. Crunching sounds echo under his feet, breaking apart. Glass. Glass and water.

Michelle’s laptop is standing open on the kitchen counter, her phone next to it. Peter reaches out to move the cursor, holding his breath as he waits for life to return to the screen. Life doesn’t come. Dead.

“MJ?” Peter calls out into the apartment, moving further into their home. Into the living area. A window is left wide open, despite how cold it is. Peter carefully closes it and clicks the window lock. Keeps going. The bathroom door is half open, untouched. The bedroom is quiet. The bed hasn’t been used, still made perfectly. Michelle wasn’t there.

Peter sighs, scanning the room again as if he’d somehow missed Michelle lying in bed. Sleeping softly and soundly. But the bed remains empty. Cold.

Where had she gone?

He backtracks to the kitchen, staring at the broken glass, before connecting the laptop to the charger. Watching the battery icon blink a few times before blue light glows into his eyes as it springs to life. Showing Peter the last thing Michelle had seen.

At the top of the page is written A.I.M in thick black letters on a yellow background. The company that had offered to sponsor Otto’s work. But it’s not A.I.M’s webpage, it’s their mail server. Someone Michelle had gotten access to as a password and gotten into their system. And the emails she’d been reading made Peter feel sick to his stomach.

 

                      [email protected]:

I am worried about our latest member of A.I.M. While I believe that Dr. Octavius' technology fits perfectly with what A.I.M is trying to achieve, I don’t think that the Doctor himself does.

His latest reports show that he’s been testing the neuro chip, meant to be controlling the artificial limbs. Whether it’s a symptom of his condition or a side effect of using the neuro chip is yet to be determined. But the doctor has appeared aggressive towards my staff.

On another note, Dr. Octavius has talked to his student again. Saying he wants Mr. Parker to take over once Otto himself is no longer able to finish the project.

I’m not sure if Peter Parker would be willing to continue the work with A.I.M. If this became a reality.

What’s the next step AK?

 

                      [email protected]:

Keep an eye on Dr. Octavious for now. Keep me posted about any changes in his condition.

Mr. Parker won’t be an issue. His work with Stark Industries will keep him plenty preoccupied.

 

Peter swallows hard, rereading the emails. His hands are shaking as he scrolls through the other pages that Michelle has found. Blueprints of the same weapons Peter had been holding just a few hours ago. Of the arc reactor in a simpler, less effective version. All right there on A.I.M’s servers. With Otto’s watermark on them.

It couldn’t be… could it? Otto was his teacher. His mentor. Otto hated weapons as much as Peter did. So why was he designing them for AI?

While I believe that Dr. Octavius' technology fits perfectly with what A.I.M is trying to achieve, I don’t think that the Doctor himself does.

Maybe the weapons weren’t for A.I.M at all. Peter knew little about the company, but he had only ever heard of one company that could viral Tony’s weapons. Hammer. But this wasn’t Hammer tech. This was Otto’s design. There was no doubt about it. Peter had worked with these things for so long… it was a wonder he hadn’t recognized it when he tore the weapon apart.

He thinks back now, to their conversation. Otto defending Tony. The words he’d said… “I think, you need to be very careful what you do next, Peter.” Was it possible, that these weapons were Otto’s work?

The next page in Michelle's laptop holds the photos Peter had seen earlier. Boxes with the numbers XMGM-287. LOT GO739-07-B-0031. But there are more photos here. Hundreds.

On another page again is research into Otto. The fact he’d help make Oscope had studied together with Norman, the same man who was now cutting his funding completely. Forcing Otto to find someone new, to accept A.I.M’s offer.

To become a part of a… think tank.

Peter doesn’t waste another second. Grabbing a backpack and stuff the laptop and charger into it. Takes her phone too. Anything and everything that might be of value.

If Michelle thought that Otto was doing this – and all the evidence pointed at that – and if it was true that Otto had been testing the neuro control chip on his own, maybe even for extended periods… Peter didn’t want to think about what that could do to a person. Especially someone like his professor, who was already in a bad place because of his medical condition.

Because of the anger he carried about the people, preventing him from doing his work.

He rushes out the door, not carrying to close it or lock it behind him. Rushes up the stairs, back towards the rooftop. His phone pressed against his ear. “Pick up, pick up… pick up… dammit MJ, pick up!”

“You’ve reached the voicemail of-“

Peter slams the red button and picks a different number. Waiting for Tony to pick up. The second he’s through he speaks. “Tony… Tony MJ is gone. I… I think she might have had a lead. I’m going to check it out right now. I’ll have Jarvis send you everything. I…” Peter swallows hard, reaching the rooftop. “Tony, I need SHIELD to focus their search on Otto Octavius.”

“Your professor?” Tony sounds confused. “Why?”

Peter takes a deep breath, shifting from foot to foot to burn with anxious energy. His heart is pounding. He can’t believe he’s even saying this at all. “Otto’s been… testing some tech himself. I have reason to believe it might be corrupting his brain… if he caught MJ snooping around. I don’t even want to think about what could happen to her.”

He doesn’t need to think about it, his brain is coming up with worst-case scenarios already. He knows better than anyone, maybe even Otto himself, what those arms can do.

They didn’t just give people back what they’d lost. It made them stronger. That was what they’d created. Weapons under the disguise of medical tech…

 

***

 

Otto’s lab is turned over. Peter had never seen so much destruction in one place, maybe except his time in captivity. It was not even a day ago this was a functional lab, but now the tables had been turned over. Glass beakers and cups had shattered against the tile floor. Chemicals had been spilled, and mixed, and if it wasn’t for the Iron Man suit Peter wouldn’t have been able to enter the lab at all.

The walls were covered in marker drawings. Crazy squiggly lines, that Jarvis scans in the HUD, sending off to the waiting SHIELD team at Stark Tower. But most of them have been partially destroyed by claw marks.

The arms.

“You weren’t kidding about being worried…” Tony speaks through the suit speakers. His face is in one corner of the HUD. Big enough for Peter to see, but not big enough to distract him.

There’s a charged backpack on the floor, that had once been Peter’s. The artificial arms that they’d been working on were torn in pieces, discarded on the floor like a plastic toy that hadn’t been played with in decades. Papers were strewed about, in a mess.

“If the state of that lab is anything to go by, I don’t think your girlfriend is getting out of this on her own.”

Peter wishes he could glare at Tony as he speaks. Instead, his voice forms into the deepest growl he can form in his throat. “Shut up and get Jarvis to work looking for a damn octopus on social media.”

“Right away sir.” The AI’s voice echoes, and before Peter, a new window opens in the HUD. Scanning every social media post. They flash by so fast that Peter can’t make out what any of them look like. Can’t tell if there are people, or a city, or cars.

Everyone is holding their break while Jarvis works.

And then the map appears, and red and green dots decorate it. Jarvis running through them. Discards them. Adds new once. Until a single dot remains. A photo of Otto appears on the screen. Wearing the lab glasses, he’s loved, and his green lab coat. And attached to his back are the four, long, clunky metallic arms with massive claws.

Tony’s tiny face morphs into disbelief. “You’re gonna need more backup than just Jarvis.” He says, looking at the photo on his end too.

Peter couldn’t argue with that. He had a feeling in his chest, that he wouldn’t stand a chance if he went toe to toe with Otto. Not in a fistfight anyway. But maybe he didn’t have to. It was Otto after all. His mentor. The man who sent him on this journey in the first place.

He didn’t need to fight Otto. He just had to talk to him. Make him realize what the neuro control chip was doing to his brain.

And then fix it.

Looking at it like that, it didn’t sound so hard. Maybe not like a walk in the park, but Peter had escaped captive, mostly on his own. He hadn’t had a proper suit then. Imagine what he could do now.

 

***

 

“I should have known that little piece of shit would come looking. It was only a question about time… he just made one mistake. He sent you.” Pete hears Otto’s voice over a video as he flies back towards Stark Tower. Jarvis had found that the last time Otto was seen was on his way there. Maybe to find Peter. With Michelle wrapped in one of his tentacle arms.

It’s easy enough to find the scientist. He left a mess behind over overturned cars, injured people, and shattered windows high in the sky, where windows shouldn’t be shattered at all. Like that that, anyway.

He sees Otto soon. From a distance.

“Professor!” Peter shouts at him as he nears, hoping Otto will look at him so that they can talk. “Professor, please. Put her down, and I’ll help you. You’re sick.”

The voice that responds is deep, almost a growl. Peter can see how Otto’s face tightens once Peter reaches him. Knows from posture alone, that the doctor is angry. Even if he can’t see his eyes.

“Oh Peter, Peter… Peter.” Otto shakes his head. “I’ve never felt more like myself.”

The man slowly crawls higher up the skyscraper. His claws dug into the side of the building, leaving major wholes behind. “Dr. Octavious please, the chip is messing with your head. But we can fix this. Together.”

“T-together?” Otto looks at Peter. Stops in his tracks, and just, hovers there. On the side of a building. Michelle looks scared but doesn’t speak.

He’s reaching him. Just like he knew he could.

“Of course,” Peter promises, letting his helmet open so that Otto can see his face. So that they can make an emotional connection. Otto reaches for his lab goggles too, shifting them up to sit above his ears. “You asked me to be your intern, and I told you it would be an honor. That hasn’t changed, even if you need to find funding somewhere else. But we need to do it right. What you’re doing is dangerous.”

“D-dangerous…?” Otto’s voice grows softly. His skin pales. “Yes… Yes, I suppose. You’re right.”

Peter reaches out a hand, a peace offering. And for a moment it looks like Otto is truly gonna do it. Take it and follow Peter to a place where he could help.

Maybe SHIELD would know what to do. Coulson surely would. Or, maybe Peter could fix it. He almost had a finished degree in EE and CpE. Sure, he was on medical leave, but he hadn’t taken a break from science. He’d just focused on something else for a while.

Like his therapist had taught him to, for his PTSD.

Below them is an inferno. Cars burning, and people crying. In the HUD Peter can see a young girl, looking lost, searching for her mom. An older man lying lifeless on the ground.

“Otto, please…” Peter asks once more.

But Otto doesn’t take his hand. Instead, Otto loosens his grasp on Michelle. “You can’t help me anymore Peter. You’ve already lost.”

Michelle falls.

Otto drops her from the top of a building, down into the inferno below. Right then Peter doesn’t care about the rest of the world, tumbling down around him. He uses all his power, to try to reach Michelle in time.

Watches at the suit reaches max speed. Feel the heat in the boots and gloves, burning, and glowing dangerously red. The amount of energy running through the suit is unmatched by anything.

“MJ!” Peter shouts. So close, so close… So close.

They’re fingering touch. Just another inch. Just a little further. Just a little further.

Her screams grow louder. It’s the only thing Peter can hear as he tries to grasp her hand. Or her wrist. Anything. “Peter…”

But it’s not enough. The suits are too slow as they drop through the air. And then she’s gone. Disappearing into the burning flames, consumed before she even hits the ground. Gone.

It feels as if he’s watching in slow motion.

Peter’s heart shatters, as Michelle’s stops beating.

They’d meet in class. It felt like forever ago now. A nerd and a journalist going out for coffee. And then… growing into something more. A safety. A network. Even when Peter was at his darkest, Michelle had been right there.

… The night he had a dream about the suit.

The nights of flashbacks and nightmares about… that damned cave. The attack.

She’d been there through all of it. Never tried to stop him. Only guiding him. And now she was gone… gone… gone because of Otto. Because of Dr. Octavious.

Peter looks up, watching as Otto moves through the city. Disappearing behind a building, out of sight. “Peter… Peter!” Tony’s voice is shaky and panicked, having seen what just happened. “Peter, are you alright?”

A second face appears in the HUD then, Coulson. “We’re tracking him. What’s the plan?”

“Mr. Parker, it appears Dr. Octavious is moving toward Central Park…” Jarvis jumps in too.

All the voices echo in his head, and Peter can’t breathe. He isn’t sure he understands any of the words at all. A massive mountain of demands being placed on him… drowning him…

“I… I can’t, I can’t… I don’t know how. It’s not my technology.” Peter answers. Yinsen translates.

His head is pushed down into the water before he can even pull in a mouthful of air. Instead, he water. Ice-cold water fills his lungs. Something sparks, and pain surges through his chest. His heart skips a beat, then another and another, before it beats again. A painful, horrible pumping through his body.

Peter’s head is pulled up, just long enough for him to grasp for air before he’s dunked again, and again, and again. It’s like having an asthma attack, all over again. Into the light… Light… And it flickers to life in his mind, low a burning sun. He almost felt it in his grasp. Just out of reach…

“STOP!” Peter’s voice carries through the suit speakers. His head pounding. The arc reactor in his chest burned.

How could Peter stop someone stronger than himself? The same way he had the first time.

The arc reactor. “Tony, get to the reactor lab. I need you to be ready to overload the system on my command.”

“What? But that will make it explode… Peter, what are you talking about?” But Peter doesn’t respond. Shouting at Jarvis to mute the system. Flies to intercept Otto.

“You want to kill someone?” Peter shouts. “Kill me.”

 

***

 

“The exact details of the accident of at Stark Industries have yet to be disclosed.” The journalist Peter and Michelle had talked to is standing on the TV screen. In a smaller video is a massive blue beam playing on repeats, as the energy of the arc reactor is unleashed into the sky.

Peter didn’t remember what had happened. Just an intense heat against his skin, as it had blown up. And Otto… Otto…

Someone turns the TV off. It goes dark, just as a man steps through the hospital doors. At first, Peter expects it to be Tony, but instead, he finds Coulson. And a dark-skinned man, with one eye covered. Hidden away, like a pirate.

“You think you’re the only superhero in the world?” The man asks, taking a seat next to Peter. In an uncomfortable hospital chair. Crossing his legs.

Peter swallows hard, shaking his head. He knew he wasn’t. “Steve Rogers,” Peter says easily.

The man nods. “Mr. Parker. You’ve become part of a bigger universe. You just don’t know it yet.”

“Who are you?” Peter asks carefully.

“Nick Fury.” The man responds. “Director of SHIELD. I’m here to talk to you about the Avengers Initiative.”

 

Peter Parker will return in…

“From The Grave Beyond”

Notes:

The truth is... that I'd given up on this serious. You'll find that this is the second time I post the final chapter. Last time as "Endings." This time as "Dawn." Only this time I actually put the love and care into the chapter, that it deserved.

This was my vision. This was what I wanted to do.

And there's more coming. There's allready chapters of "From the Grave Beyond" posted, but, that's not the end. I have so many plans. You can't even imagine.

Notes:

Iron man 1 rewrite... or, sorta powerswap AU?

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 1 of Principles