Work Text:
Jared loves his job. It pays well. He can do it while walking, sitting or even laying down. The hours are flexible and his boss is far away. He can eat Gummi bears while doing it. He can drink a beer (although never too many or he’d get too stupid). Hell, he can even watch TV while doing it – but only with the sound off. Once he forgot to mute the TV first and the client heard it and, well, there might have been some insult felt. But, c’mon, nobody really believes that when they call the Always Up Phoneline they are getting someone who is really jerking off along with them, do they?
He runs his hair back and lets the guy keep groaning in his ear. The man asks on a moan, “Is it good for you? Am I fucking you good?”
Jared moans back and throws in an “ahhh” or two for good measure. Who knows? Maybe the schnook does believe it. Doesn’t make a difference. It’s easy money and helps cover everything his scholarship doesn’t and it’s anonymous and he’ll be graduating soon and nobody will ever know and so what if he overthinks this sometimes? What doesn’t he overthink?
Chad comes in quietly. Jared holds up a finger indicating that he will be done soon. He hits mute quickly. He can’t keep it on too long because after all, the client is paying to hear Jared after all. “Working tonight,” he gets out quickly before making it clear that he’s unmuting the line by putting his finger over his lips in a universal sign of ‘silence.’
Chad disappears into his bedroom and shuts the door gently. Normally Jared works out of his own bedroom. The company set him up with a special phone with its own line. He’s not sure how this all works and how they track how long anyone is on the phone with him but he knows the longer he keeps them the better it is for everyone. He set the record last month for longest call at a very impressive seventy-seven minutes. Now women, they can take forever to come. But he’s exclusive to the gay side of the business and getting a man to last that long, well, Jared was pretty darn proud of himself. Or maybe the guy just had some sort of dysfunction? Jared really does need to think a little less.
He’s not sure now if his roommate’s plans have changed and he’ll be here the rest of the night or if he just needed to come back for something … the client’s speech has accelerated. He sounds close. “You love it, right? Love how I’m fucking you?”
Jared chimes in quickly. “Yeah, oh, god, yes, sooo good. Fuck me harder, like that man, let me feel it.”
Chad pops back out. At one point Jared would flush with embarrassment but he’s been doing this for six months now and he’s pretty hardened. Well, not that kind of hardened. He’s never actually gotten turned on by any client. Because that would just be. No. The client is down to pant … grunt … pant … Jared knows he could keep it going but honestly he’s getting bored with this one.
“Fuck me, yeah, wanna feel you come in my tight ass, shoot your come deep inside … c’mon, man.”
The door closes gently behind Chad who glanced at Jared with a quick eye roll before promptly heading back out. Jared wishes he could tell Chad that he thinks he’ll be done soon and maybe to wait up but it’s too late because Chad is gone and then the guy on the phone lets out a final deep groan and it’s all over.
Jared hangs up and paces a bit. He runs his hands through his hair and glances at the time and stares at the door Chad just walked out of until with a sigh he picks up the phone and dials the service telling them he’s free to receive another call. It’s been a while, he realizes as he waits for the phone to ring since he’s just plain talked to someone -- with no grunts involved.
“Hey there, this is Jay, I’m just sitting here horny, how about you?”
Silence. Jared strains thinking maybe the line was dropped when he hears a tiny cough. Okay. A quiet one. That’s okay … he could handle those.
“You know what I think would be really great?” He doesn’t bother waiting for a reply. “How ‘bout we just make ourselves more comfortable. Thursday night and it’s getting late … let’s stretch out, what do you say?”
Still silent but Jared swears he hears a little breathing so he ventures on. “I’m stretched out now. But I’m still feeling a little … stiff … “ He fights his own inward groan at the horrible pun. “I think I’m gonna start taking off some clothes. That okay with you, pal?”
“I should – shouldn’t of – think I should go.”
Jared is stunned. First time that happened. “Whoa. Wait pal. We can do anything you want, okay? No need to rush off.”
“Mis—take.”
The guy’s voice is soft yet deep. And Jared has this irrational desire to hear more of it.
“Hey, I’m bummed. You saying you don’t want to talk to me?”
There is a sputtering sound. “That’s not—I mean, I didn’t mean it … “
Jared chuckles. “Relax, I’m just playing with you. I’m Jay. What’s your name?”
“J—Jensen.”
Jared turns the name over in his head. It’s different but cool. “Nice name. Now, Jensen, why not tell me why you called.” Some clients, especially those who’d never called a phone sex line before really needed to be drawn out slowly. Eventually though they admitted what they were craving. At these rates it made no sense to pussyfoot around for too long. The phone made it anonymous and safe.
“I didn’t … I didn’t talk to anyone today.”
Jensen’s voice deepens slightly at this, yet the slight nervous warble is still there. Jared isn’t really sure what to say to this. He thinks back to his own day. He’d left really early to head to a morning class. Chad had still been asleep. The large lecture hall was packed and he’d scribbled his notes and tried to stay awake and suddenly he didn’t recall if he’d said hello to the gal sitting next to him or just smiled at her. Or maybe he nodded at her. Then there’d been a quick run for breakfast but he’d sat alone and wolfed it down and then another class and more note-taking and lunch was also on the run because he wanted to get in a workout and he must have spoken with someone at the gym, right? Fuck.
“You know what Jensen, I don’t think I spoke to very many people today, either.” Jared pauses, air leaving his lungs faster than he expected. “But … hey, we’re talking to each other now, right?”
“You … you would just talk to me? I mean … I don’t want to … Oh god. I’m such an idiot.”
“Stop. You’re not an idiot. And, yeah, I’ll … I mean honestly it’s your dime. You only want to talk shit it’s okay with me. But … tell the truth man, if you want to … do more … I’m good with that, too. No need to be shy about it. Okay?”
“Okay. I mean, just talking.”
It gets quiet. Jared hasn’t had to just chat about nothing with his clients before. He feels oddly self-conscious. “So, Jensen, tell me what you like.”
“I told you I didn’t want—“
“No. That’s not—Tell me what you like outside of sex.”
And so it begins.
Jensen speaks of small things like The Simpsons and Chunky Monkey ice cream and his love of all things sci-fi. They exchange favorite bands. Jared gets a rousing explanation of what string theory is in relation to how the Stargate might work, but it didn’t make much sense. Only that didn’t matter because the other man’s voice took on this awesome animation explaining it. Jared wonders if anything makes his own voice get that way. After a few minutes extolling the perfection of Flutternutter sandwiches with sliced bananas and honey, he thinks maybe he comes close.
At the hour mark, Jared feels guilty at how expensive this call is going to be for Jensen and slowly (and rather reluctantly) jokes that it’s time for a ‘happy ending’.
“Huh?”
“Well, most of my calls end when my client gets off.”
There is a flustered sound that hasn’t been present during most of their chat. “Of course,” Jensen says. “I won’t keep you any longer.”
Jared laughs but it feels forced even to his own ears. “You can keep me for as long as you wish, but I’m not looking to bankrupt you, pal.”
“Ahh. Not to worry. I have money.”
“Well, that’s good to hear.”
“Goodnight, Jay.”
“Goodnight, Jensen.”
* * *
Jared doesn’t take any more calls that night. He roots through his DVD collection and watches a few Simpsons episodes before going to bed early.
The next day is pretty much the same. He runs in the morning because he doesn’t have an early class. Returns to the room for a quick shower and dashes to pick up some breakfast. He makes it a point to strike up a conversation or two but ultimately leaves the cafeteria alone and heads quickly to class. As a grad student his load is heavy. He needs to graduate on time. Really can’t afford much more of school and needs to be done and get a job and figure out how he’s going to pay back the loans he’s already taken just to get to this point. Of course, he can always fall back on the phone sex job but just thinking that makes the pancakes he gulped down start to flip over again in his stomach.
Chad is in the room later when he returns. “You working again tonight, Jay-man?”
Jared knocked off about two hours early yesterday. He really should make up for it tonight or his paycheck will be way short of his bills. “Gotta.”
Chad’s mouth purses. “Doesn’t it hurt your ears hearing those losers come in them over and over?”
The immediate visual he gets of men ejaculating in his ear makes Jared want to heave. He knows Chad didn’t mean it this way. But still. “Ugh. Chad … it’s not … “ Except, of course. It is. “They aren’t all losers,” he says instead and immediately he’s thinking of a deep yet soft voice debating which Starbuck was tougher. Jared put his money on Kara Thrace. If his clients are all losers, then what the hell is Jared?
Chad repents. “Sorry. I shouldn’ta said that. I know you’re hurting for dough what with your dad out of work.” Jared’s father was laid off from the plant where he worked for nearly thirty years. His parents were struggling on his mom’s meager Wal-Mart salary and Jared only wants to graduate and get a job and start helping his family. Instead, his mother sends him a check every few months just because. And Jared thinks really hard about not cashing it. Until he does.
“ ‘S okay. Not like the job’s hard.”
“But you never get to go out. Have fun. Jeez, Jay, when was the last time you even really jerked off and not pretended to? Forget about actually getting laid … because that’s been forever ago.”
Jared blushes. Chad isn’t the best with personal boundaries. But they’ve known each other since freshman year and Chad pays more than half of the rent for the apartment they were so thrilled to get off campus junior year and he’s a good friend and, well, Jared just deals. “I date,” he answers back lamely. It’s not true, of course, in fact, he can’t remember the last date he was on and that’s well. It’s pathetic.
Chad goes out and Jared has the apartment to himself again that evening so he stretches out on the sofa, puts his feet up on the coffee table and turns the TV on minus the sound. He’s flipping stations as he talks his first client to orgasm. The guy is into roleplaying and so Jared has to keep calling him ‘professor’ which is fifty kinds of weird because there’s been maybe one professor in his four years of college that he’d even considered fucking. And even then, only if he’d been the last man on the planet. Jared decides that those porn flicks with the hot professors are overrated and give impressionable gay teens false hope for their college years. “Oh, yeah, punish me some more professor,” he gasps into the phone.
“Take that you naughty, naughty boy … you like that, yeah, oh yeah … “
Sounds like it won’t be long. Jared groans as if struck and loving it. Sick fuck. And hears a tell-tale near yell on the line indicating that, thank goodness, this call is over. He thanks his teacher for the lesson and hangs up. Time for a beer.
Friday night and here Jared is alone. He fights the pang of self-pity and lets the service know he’s up for another call.
“J-Jay?”
The voice is instantly familiar and Jared sits up with a start. “Jensen?”
“Yeah. It’s me … um, again. I hope it’s okay. I just … it was good to talk to someone yesterday … to you .. and I thought, maybe, if it’s okay … again?”
Jared’s smiling which feels odd on his face and that’s when he realizes he hasn’t smiled in what feels like hours. A strange feeling comes over him when he realizes the last time he smiled was last night on the phone with Jensen when they’d debated X-box versus PS3. “Hey pal. I’d love to talk to you again. I mean … if that’s what you want. The offer still stands to, um, do other stuff. Whatever you want, okay?”
There’s a moment of hesitation. “I don’t want you to think you’re not good at your job. I mean, you have a great voice … and … I just, I guess, it’s just that I could do that other stuff alone, you know.” There’s a moment of embarrassed almost chuckling. “But talking, well, you really do need two people.”
Jared doesn’t know why he asks this. “Who else did you talk to today, Jensen?”
Silence. It feels a long time before Jensen says, “No one.”
Now Jared wonders if Jensen is some sort of odd recluse. Maybe he has that neurosis that doesn’t let him leave the house or anything. He can’t quite think of anything sadder and inexplicably doesn’t want this for Jensen. Doesn’t like thinking of sunshine never reaching the other man’s face.
Jensen starts talking again. “I work from home. It’s … exacting work and I don’t get out much.”
“What kind of work do you do?”
“I’m with the defense department. Anti-terrorism. I can’t … I can’t say much because it’s all classified. Mostly though, I decode.”
Jared doesn’t know what to say to this. “Yesterday, I got the impression you were into physics.”
“Yeah. That, too. But that’s more a hobby, I guess. I mean, I could’ve worked … but this came along and I’ve always loved decryptions. I’m good with computers. And my dad said it was important, this work. So I don’t know, I guess he’s right, you know?”
“I’m studying to become a teacher.” Jared blurts this out before he can think because the number one rule of the phone sex trade is not to talk personal about oneself. Dammit, he keeps forgetting Jensen is a client. An unusual one, but a client nonetheless. They aren’t friends. They won’t be friends.
“Wow. That’s cool. I’ve had some amazing teachers. Wasn’t for them I don’t know what I would have done. School was hard as is.”
“What do you mean?”
More hesitation as he senses Jensen stumbling over what to say. “I … I’m smart. So they accelerated me through school. I graduated college at fifteen and well, I had my second PhD before I hit twenty.”
“How old are you now?”
“Twenty-eight.”
“Well, I’m hoping to get my Masters in Education come summer and start teaching so I can begin living a real life, you know?”
“You … this job is to get you through graduate school?”
Jared suddenly feels ashamed, which has not happened on any call since his first week. “Yeah. I … had to take out loans and even with a scholarship the bills mount up. I tried the waiter route, working coffee shops, fast food. Nothing paid like this gig or offered the flexibility.” He stops. Why in hell was he justifying himself to this genius stranger?
Jensen senses that Jared has stopped awkwardly. “I didn’t … I mean, I’m not judging. Wouldn’t. Heck, I already told you I sit alone with my computer all day. I have to pay to just have someone talk to me.”
This stops Jared cold. And suddenly he feels sleazier than he has with any of the losers who call for sex. Buying an orgasm is one thing. Buying human interaction just feels wrong. “No. Look, Jensen, you’re a nice guy I can tell. And this isn’t the answer. I’m hanging up now. You need to try to get yourself out of your apartment and into the real world, man. Think of this as tough love, okay?”
He disconnects the call before Jensen can say another word.
He doesn’t call the service to say he can take any more clients. Instead, he leaves for the nearby bar he hasn’t seen the inside of in more time than he can remember and proceeds to get himself totally shitfaced. Chad finds him puking when he stumbles home and asks if he’s sick. Jared doesn’t answer. Just splashes water on his face and staggers to his bed.
* * *
Jared makes his best paycheck on Saturdays. He stays locked in his bedroom from nine p.m. through two p.m., groaning and moaning and grunting as if he’s getting the fuck of his life. He’s dressed in his sweats and the way he feels right now he can’t even imagine getting hard. At one p.m. he allows himself his one beer.
The last client had wanted lots of talking and Jared has expired his entire vocabulary of filthy talk and feels parched. His throat is scratchy and raw. He used to like raunchy talk in bed. Now he wonders if he’d be this silent partner during a sex act.
He lays back on the bed and downs most of the beer in one long drought before answering the phone. “Hi, this is Jay, what are you up to tonight?”
“Don’t be mad.”
“Jensen?”
“I tried. I did. I did what you said. I went out at lunch and sat in a coffee shop and told myself I wouldn’t leave until I talked to someone.”
“Did you?”
“Well, the barista who took my coffee order.”
Jared chuckles slightly. “That’s not quite what I meant, Jen.”
There is a huge sigh. “In school everyone was always so much older. I just … never had friends my age and my dad tried. He did. He signed me up for some sports league … but … I’m not all that coordinated. I can run but that’s about it. So I ended up doing track and stuck to myself most of the time. I haven’t … I just don’t know how to talk to people. Except … I was able to talk to you.”
Jared feels something tighten in his chest. “I can’t … it’s not right that you pay like this just to talk to me.” The silence on the other end feels deeper somehow. Jared makes an instant decision. He rattles off a phone number.
“What’s that?” Jensen asks, the hope in his voice clear as a church bell.
Jensen could be completely insane. He could be an ax murderer. But Jared takes the leap anyway. “That’s my cell phone number. I have to finish working now. But I’m off tomorrow. Call whenever.”
Jensen’s voice is thick, like pea soup. “Thanks Jay.”
“Jared.”
“Huh?
“Jay’s my nickname and the name I use for work. You can call me that if you like. But my real name’s Jared.”
“’Night, Jared.” Jared is pretty sure he hears a smile.
“’Night, Jensen.”
* * *
Jensen calls Jared at noon on Sunday. They talk about nothing for a long time. Chad pops out of his room and mouths ‘working’?
Jared says hold on a second to Jensen and answer loudly. “Nope. Talking to a friend.” Jared hears a smile again.
It doesn’t take long for Jared to get really curious about Jensen but it takes until Wednesday and a dozen phone calls before a small awkward photo appears in Jared’s email. Jensen took it himself by holding out his arm. The perspective is off and the photo is crooked and Jared really hopes he isn’t coming down with the stomach flu because his belly is doing this odd little jig.
Chad peers over his shoulder. “That the geek?”
“Don’t call him that.”
“Right. Decryptions for the defense department – I’m sure they hire only jocks.”
“Fuck you.”
“Whatever. When are you and him finally getting together?”
Jared doesn’t answer.
Jensen suggests using a web cam but Jared’s laptop is ancient and doesn’t have a built-in one and Jared never got around to buying one and now he feels like he can’t even afford a stick of gum. Jensen pushes and Jared admits. “I’m not working right now.”
“What?”
“Your last call … was my last one. I didn’t … I just quit, okay?”
Jensen is silent. And Jared stares at Jensen’s fuzzy, skewed photo and smiles till his dimples show.
* * *
“Oh yeah, like that, just like that, suck it … oh fuck, so good, mouth made for sucking … ohfuckfeelssogood … “
Jared can’t talk anymore because his brain just liquefied and is currently spilling out of his cock and while it’s a shame he has no brain cells anymore he also really doesn’t care.
Eventually, Jared recovers enough to return the favor. Jensen’s cock is like his favorite flavor of everything so he takes his time and while Jensen never really says much during sex he lets out this small breathy moan that makes Jared’s cock twitch even though there’s just no way. He swallows every drop and works Jensen slowly down. He scoots up and takes his boyfriend in a deep, lingering kiss and knows he has to leave pretty soon for one of his two new jobs but really doesn’t want to.
It’s been three months since Jared surprised Jensen by showing up at his regular coffee shop. Really fruitful visit. Got him a job. And someone he can’t imagine living without.
He cuddles closer. Time’s tight. But there’s got to be a little time for snuggling. “Jen?”
“Hmm?”
“Who’d you talk to today?”
Jensen inches closer. “You.”
Jared sighs. They are working on this. It’s been slow going. “Besides me.”
Jensen rises up on one elbow and peers at him. Oh yeah. That original horrible photo never showed Jared this. Deep green eyes that engulf him like a tranquil sea. If Jared was a deep thinker he’d decide that the meaning of life resided in those eyes. His naked appreciation earns him a small, crooked grin and slight blush. Jensen is clueless how gorgeous he is. Probably will never accept it. But Jared plans to never stop trying to convince him.
“I said hello to the barista again. And at the checkout line in the grocery store I spoke with the lady behind me.”
“Yeah? What about?”
Jensen ducks his head in a way that Jared finds adorable. He usually tells Jensen this just to make him blush but today he listens quietly.
“I told her that the accident on aisle four could be explained by chaos theory.”
Jared bites back a laugh. “I’m sure she was glad you cleared that up for her.”
It takes a second. “Are you teasing me?”
Jared leans in for another kiss. “I love you too much to tease you.”
Jensen’s eyes light up like the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree . “I … “ His head ducks again and buries itself in Jared’s neck. Jensen’s gotten better at saying it back but sometimes he just can’t. Jared doesn’t mind. Jensen has one hand wrapped in Jared’s hair and the other moving south quickly and his lips are sucking on the skin below his collar bone and Jared thinks talking is really overrated anyway.
fin