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Dutch cried hysterically as he finished writing his SUICIDE NOTE!! He whimpered and placed the note on his bed (neatly so he doesn't crunch it up!!!). Dutch grabbed his super expensive, golden engraved, high quality revolver and aimed it towards his head.
"Cruel, cruel world, must I go on..." Dutch sobbed and whimpered. Dutch pulled the trigger and turned into Sean. He then died, obviously.
Everyone was in shock as they heard the gun shot! They all quickly ran to Dutch's tent. Hosea was the first person in. He gasped in HORROR!
"NOOOOOOOOO, MY KITTEN!!!" Hosea screamed at the top of his diseased lungs. "WHO AM I GOING TO BREED NOW?!?" He sobbed so hard his eyes almost popped out of his skull.
Arthur picked up the note, placed neatly on Dutch's bed. "Hey now y'all there's a note boahs!!" They all looked at the note and they could all hear Dutch reading it - like in a movie!
The note read: Dear Boot Munchers, I am probably dead right now. My head probably is gone, like Sean's. I did a Sean and busted my head open. Anywho, Hosea, if you're reading this... I'm sorry. You won't be able to breed your submissive kitten anymore... And... I was... Pregnant with your kittens. I couldn't do it, Hosea. I could feel all 1,899 of them kicking. Funny, because that's what year it is. I'll miss you, my sugar plum, honeypie, bee wax, horse manure, pumpkin, dumplin', darling, cutie patootie of mine.
From, Dutch Peg der Linde
Everyone's jaws DROPPED! They were flabbergasted. Hosea's fists balled up and comical steam blew out of his ears. He grabbed the gun that Dutch had used and proceeded to shoot EVERYONE in the gang. Even little Jackie.
Once all his friends and family were gone, he sobbed hysterically for 48 hours straight. His kittens! Dead... Nobody to breed. He decided to end it all as well. So, he pulled a Sean and died right next to his lover.
The End