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"DAMN IT!" Gojo yelled at the television screen. He just placed 3rd in Fortnite solos battle royale. He flopped onto his side.
"You're so dogwater, Satoru. This is why we never play with you," Geto called from the other end of the couch.
"What?! I literally placed third! Higher than you ever will!" Gojo pouted.
"I always get the victory royale. Every time," Shoko commented. Geto confirmed with a knowing nod.
"Whatever. I think they should add me to the game– some cursed techniques, too. Then I'd dominate every lobby." Gojo straightened up as the game queued him for another round.
"Sure you would," Geto and Shoko said in monotonous unison. Shoko pulled out a cigarette.
"Are you even allowed to smoke in here?" Geto asked.
Shoko blew a neat smoke ring in response. "Nah."
The two of them continued watching Gojo struggle to get a win, but watching him pull at his hair in rage every round started to get boring.
"It's weird that when we get breaks from missions all Satoru does is play Fortnite," Shoko said.
"Even the strongest sorcerers deserve a Fortnite grind opportunity!"
"Then why are you playing?"
Gojo rolled his eyes. The last player was consumed by the storm which granted him his first victory royale of the hour. He pumped his fist, accompanied with a little "yeah!". Geto let out a giggle.
"What's so funny?? Is it that surprising for me to have won a single game?" Gojo turned to see that Geto was in fact not paying attention to Gojo's victory royale, but something on his phone.
"Psh. What, you texting your girlfriend or somethin', Suguru?" Gojo teased.
"You're such an attention seeker," Geto sighed. "Maybe I am talking to my girlfriend," he added smugly. Shoko snickered.
Gojo perked up. "WHAT?" He crawled like a roach over to Geto's spot on the couch to try and look at his phone, which was promptly shut at his approach. "I don't believe you. Describe her."
Geto quirked an eyebrow. "She's pure of heart, funny, charming, and drop-dead gorgeous," he said without missing a beat. "Oh, and she has the most lovely eyes I could stare at for hours."
Gojo frowned.
"How it pains me to be away from my one and only!" Geto cried in an exaggerated manner.
"You're messing with me! There's no way you get a girlfriend before I do. I've got everything! A sense of humor, charisma, good looks, and strength and a LOT more! You have depression!" Gojo cried. "Sorry that was uncalled for."
Geto stared at him.
"Shoko, I trust you. Is it true? Is it?"
Shoko looked to the side. "Ya."
"You're making this weird, I'm going to bed." Geto stalked off.
"Same." Shoko turned to leave but Gojo tugged her sleeve.
"Are you serious guys??? You're gonna just walk off like that? How long has this lasted? You can't possibly think I'll have a good night's sleep after this impactful revelation!" He hissed.
"It isn't that serious, but if ya really wanna know more, I think they're hanging out tomorrow evening."
"Evening?? Then it's a date! Dates are very serious, Shoko!!"
Shoko slapped Gojo's hand that was still clinging to her arm. "If it'd make you feel better we can stalk them or something. From afar."
"Why would you even suggest that? That's creepy! I'm not envious at all! What goes on in my bestest friend's personal life shouldn’t be my business!"
—
"It should totally be my business.” Gojo peered over his black-out glasses at a figure standing in the distance. Gojo was wearing an inconspicuous blonde wig and an anime shirt and shorts. Sitting beside him was Shoko in a rather fashionable fit.
“What are you even wearing??” Gojo prompted. “We’re supposed to dispel attention. You look like you’re going on a date!”
“As if people won’t look at a high schooler in a My Hero Academia shirt wearing sunglasses on a cloudy evening?” Shoko countered.
“...”
"Also, I haven’t worn these in a while and I wanted to look nice. God forbid a woman have fun.” Shoko took out her cigarette pack.
"Hey! Don’t do that now, they’re gonna smell you or something! And how do you not have lung cancer??” Gojo was considering taking her cigarettes and throwing them with superhuman strength into the atmosphere but he quite valued his life.
"Reverse cursed technique.” Shoko winked. Gojo frowned.
Earlier, Geto had told the two that he was going out for a longer mission, and that they shouldn’t waste time waiting for him to be back. “Longer mission” was definitely an excuse. Gojo had patted him on the back inconspicuously as he left and didn’t mention that his friend was wearing non-date-appropriate clothing. It would be funny to see Geto make a fool of himself in front of this “girlfriend.”
The figure in the distance, whom they discreetly followed to an uncrowded bridge somewhere in the city, had been rocking on his heels as if waiting for someone. Which he was, because a tall girl in an equally tall coat strode over to him. He perked up and waved to her.
Gojo and Shoko were out of earshot, but Gojo’s six eyes were probably pretty good at seeing from a far distance, and he was quite confident in his lip-reading abilities.
"She’s saying, ‘Gojo Satoru is the best sorcerer in the world. I would love to be his girlfriend!’ and Suguru’s saying, ‘Yes he is! Did you know I’m his friend? I can hook you guys up!” Gojo squinted. “Man! She does have nice eyes…”
"For real?” Shoko did not gaf.
Gojo sat up. “Ah, they’re heading this way, we need to goooo!” He grabbed Shoko and entered a random store just as Geto and the girl approached the bench he’d just been sitting on.
They’d entered a jewelry store and Shoko was gaping at the price tags as Gojo tried to look out the window to see where Geto had gone. When he thought they’d gone somewhere else and turned to tell Shoko they could leave, he saw them enter the same store they were in. For what reason would they need to go jewelry shopping on a date??
Gojo ducked behind a display case and yanked Shoko down with him.
"Well, time for Plan B!” Gojo said in a nerdy voice. They were just going to have to crawl around until they reached the exit.
"We’re not doing that. I don’t want to look like a deranged fool out here,” Shoko said, who, with some trusty intuition, had guessed what Gojo's “plan B” was.
"Then what are we gonna do?!” Gojo hissed.
Shoko rolled her eyes. “You’re being dramatic.” She stood up and waved in the pair’s direction. “Hey, Suguru.”
Gojo felt his heart plummet. Was this her plan all along? To drag him here and make him look like a fool in front of Geto and his date??
They hadn’t seen him yet, he could still make his escape…
“Oh– Hi?” Geto’s voice carried across the room.
"He’s here too.” Shoko pointed very blatantly at Gojo, MHA-shirt-wearing Gojo, who was halfway across the floor from Shoko to the exit. Geto burst out laughing.
"What are you guys doing here??” He wiped a tear from his eye. The girl next to him just stood there awkwardly.
"Well– uh–” Gojo forced a laugh, not knowing how to play off this strange situation, which he usually had a knack for.
"Shoko forced me to go shopping!--" "--Satoru wanted to stalk you,” Gojo and Shoko said at the same time.
"WHAT! That’s a lie! She’s lying!” Gojo waved his arms dismissively. “Just forget we were ever here! We can leave now, right, Shoko??”
Just as Gojo sat up, still quite humiliated, a shrill shriek sounded from the store’s back door. Geto sighed. He followed the girl who rushed around the counter to the door and motioned for his classmates to follow him. Shoko obliged after shrugging at Gojo, who was brushing dirt off his pants.
The four of them discovered an arrangement of chaos in the back room. A couple ceiling lights were smashed, globs of purplish slime coating areas from what the remaining light could illuminate. A young girl with blonde hair just barely darted out of the way of a falling shelf stocked with important-looking boxes. She seemed just as frightened at the items being damaged rather than the beastly creature slinking its way into the light.
The curse was dripping with the same purple slime, slobbering more of it onto the ground. It had multiple eyes that disappeared and reappeared all along its large, lumpy body. A disembodied voice repeated trills and whines that could be interpreted as “Be Mine.”
Geto shuddered at the unsettling noise. His “date” had rushed over to the young girl, picking her off the ground with ease and clutching her in her arms. “It’ll be alright, sis,” she murmured, slowly backing away from the advancing monster. Her sister’s gaze still lingered forlornly at the fallen shelves.
Right as Geto was preparing to summon a curse to his aid, Gojo heroically stepped in front of the group.
“Don’t worry guys!!” He cracked his knuckles. “Leave it to me!”
Shoko stifled a laugh at his corniness. She’d been inspecting the young girl, checking for injuries. Geto heaved a sigh, putting his head in his hands. Within moments, the curse was scurrying in circles, rapidly shedding the slimy coat, revealing a fleshy one-eyed mass in the center of the room.
“Heh,” Gojo sniffed. “Want this one, Suguru?” He turned to address his friend, only to see him speaking hurriedly to the two girls.
“I’m sorry, ma’am, I have no clue why these guys are here and I do hope you’re okay, but–-”
“We’re fine, sir. Just glad it's gone. Thank you.” The tall woman bowed. “...Thank you, too.” She turned to Gojo.
“Uhh yeah! No prob! Just a normal Tuesday for me…” Gojo's eyes drifted down to his Deku Midoriya shirt, which he was now very aware of.
Also— “ma’am”? “Sir”?? What kind of relationship was this? Bro is not a 1700’s nobleman. Gojo felt a light tap on his shoulder.
“We’re going outside,” Geto said simply, holding an ugly sphere of swirls in his hand.
Oopsie. Did I ruin his date? Was I showing off? Gojo hadn't intended for Geto to be upset. Shoko had already gone outside, so he didn’t have a third party to discern Geto’s tone. He nervously followed his friend out of the shop as he said bid farewell to the women.
Shoko was settled on the bench where she and Gojo had been stalking Geto, checking her phone. She waved in their direction, not looking up.
Gojo stopped at the bench, letting Geto consume the curse in silence. It wasn’t really pleasant to watch. A quiet “euigh” indicated he’d finished up.
Gojo turned on his heel. “I’m so sorry about your date Suguru Geto and and and its awful that the curse appeared but at least we were there to save them—”
“Woah. Calm down.” Geto put a hand on Gojo’s arm, looking a bit pale. Probably from eating that rancid curse. “No need to fullname. And what’s that about a date?”
Gojo blinked silently, having nothing to say.
Geto smirked. “You didn’t actually believe I had a girlfriend, right? You loser. You’re a weirdo.” He teasingly punched him in the arm. “You went all out, too, for just this simple mission,” he laughed.
“I hope he didn’t cause you too much trouble,” Geto called out to Shoko, who dismissed him with a shake of her head.
“Nah, it was funny. We didn’t really have anything better to do anyway.”
Gojo was blushing profusely, utterly humiliated at this revelation. It really was just a mission? He decided Geto was cruel for setting him up like this. Shoko, too. He had never felt so attacked.
“Then why did you excuse us from it and say it would last longer! Was it not a cover-up at all??” Gojo blurted.
“Oh.” Now Geto looked slightly embarrassed. “Um.”
Gojo exclaimed triumph in his head. Maybe he would get his friend to admit something. Shoko closed her phone to listen, so she probably hadn’t known the reason behind his excuse either.
“Umm…” Geto was averting his gaze from his friends. “Well, I was going to see a movie…”
“Without us?” Gojo and Shoko both said, Gojo more incredulously than Shoko.
“You said it was stupid!” Geto cried.
“When have I ever shut down your interests???” Gojo retorted. Many times, probably, but not anything he could remember as of now.
Geto frowned. “You probably think it's stupid,” he muttered. He sighed, turning to face the street and started walking.
“Hey!” Gojo called after him. He turned to Shoko, who had a look of realization on her face. “What is it? I know you know something I don’t know and I’m dying to know.”
Shoko shook her head with amusement. “He’s going to see Human Earthworm, that new movie he was talking about earlier.” She paused. “You did say it was stupid.”
“Huh.” Gojo watched Geto walk further away. "Oh."
“You’re gonna follow him?”
“I’m gonna follow him.”