Chapter Text
Tony Stark has never been a person to get a full night of sleep. Whenever he gets even remotely close, he’s suddenly interrupted. Wether it be a blaring alarm, signaling he must leave at once, or Pepper barging in, making him sign papers regarding Stark Industries.
Which is exactly why he was awake when Peter Parker called him frantically at 3:00 A.M.
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He had been staring at DUM-E script for a little over an hour, trying to fix some minor issues with his coding. The code looked fine, he couldn’t tell where he went wrong, yet when he turns his chair around, facing the bot, Tony sighed when he saw DUM-E gliding through the lab, knocking over everything in its path.
Tony got up, walked over to the bot, and clicked the ‘Emergency Off’ button. Not like it was an emergency, he just didn’t want to deal with the mess afterwards. Walking back over to his desk, Friday’s voice took over the lab.
Boss, Peter Parker is calling your mobile phone.
Why is the kid calling him at this hour? It was, he look at the big clock on his wall, 3:20, well past his curfew. Tony grumbled as he rolled his chair over to where his phone had been charging.
“What’s up, Kid?” Tony greeted, “You better not be dying.”
“Ugh, I think I might!” Tonys eyes shoot open before pulling up the suits location.
“What happened? Are you not in your suit? It says your suit is at May’s house. Did you get hurt-“
Peter cut Tony off, “No! No, sorry, it was an exaggeration!” Tony’s sigh could be heard through the call.
“Peter, you know you can’t do that. I have heart problems you know?”
“Sorry! Im so sorry, Mr. Stark. I really didn’t mean to scare you!”
Tony puts his phone on the desk, where he had been previously working, and puts Peter on speaker-phone. “It’s fine, Pete. I swear. I was only joking.” Half joking, he was technically living off an arc-reactor. “Seriously, what’s on your mind that you had to call me at this hour?”
Those words set Peter off on a ramble, that was unintelligible if you weren’t used to this. “Ohmygosh! SoMrFalcon, youknowhim, hewasdoinganinterviewandhementionedme-“ This is where Tony cut him off.
“Sam mentioned you in an interview?”
“Well not me, Spider-Man. But same thing! He said I ‘couldn’t fight to save my life’, and I should ‘go back to saving kittens out of trees’!” Tony could hear the air quotes all the way from the tower in Manhattan, “And now everyone is roasting me on twitter! God, I think I’m going to die about embarrassment.”
“So? Why don’t you just send him a response. Be like, ‘You’re dumb’ or something, I don’t know. I don’t handle my media.”
“I can’t! My account only has like, 4,000 followers, and MJ manages that. I don’t know how I’d convince her to let me do that.” Peter retorts.
“Well kid, the only thing I can recommend is to snap back, post something embarrassing. What about the footage of you wining the fight against him and the Winter Solider?”
Peters unresponsive for a few seconds, then speaks again, “I think I know what I’m going to do. Thanks Mr. Stark! Goodnight, and make sure you actually go to bed.”
“You know me too well. Goodnight Peter.” Peter ended the call.
Tony actually contemplated going upstairs and getting some sleep, but in the end, he still had some coding to complete. And what’s one more day without sleeping? Not like it’s a game.
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The video opens with a while background, and a light brown table in view. Suddenly, Spider-man, in his suit, walks into frame with a white grocery bag. He sets the bag down on the table and pulls out the chair for him to sit down in.
Staring at the camera, Spider-man flips the bag over, and dumps out the contents of the bag. The bag contained 11 mini figures, each one being either an avenger, or someone who has worked with the avengers.
Spider-man spreads them out before picking up the one the one painted red and blue. He holds the mini figure, and talks for the first time in the video.
“Hi there! My name is Spider-man, and I’m a hero who works in Queens, most of the time. Today, I’m going to be making my dream team.” He holds up the Spider-man figure, “Obviously, I will be the first one on the team, because of how awesome I am.”
He sets the figure in the center of the table, rummages through the pile, and picks up an avenger. The Hulk to be exact.
“Hm. Dr. Banner is an interesting one. He’s like, super, super smart. Smartest person alive, I will debate. And the Hulk is pretty strong, but what if we have trouble containing him.” He thinks before putting the figurine next to the one already standing. “I say we keep him, he could be very useful.”
Off-camera, another voice could be heard. A girl. “He’s only on your team because you have a fat crush on him.”
“Fair point. But who doesn’t? He’s hot, smart, and super strong! Also, I don’t have a crush on him, I just admire him, that’s all!”
“You so have a crush on hi-“ A cough interrupted her, as Spider-man picks up the next figure.
“Thor. I mean the choice is obvious,” He sets mini-Thor on the table, “He’s a God. Who wouldn’t choose him?” He skims through the rest of the options, when he picks up a girl in all black.
”The Black widow. Im going to be honest, I don’t think she likes me. Yet she’s an amazing choice. 100% on my team, any day.”
The girls voice could be heard again, “I’m starting to think everybody’s going to be on your team.”
“Nuh uh! Here, I’ll show you.” He picks up the Captain America figurine, and throws it over his shoulder. “Bad choice, never, too cocky, and I even stole his shield once! Without his shield he is basically useless…”
The scene cuts to a video, appeared to be recorded on an iPhone. Spider-man sets the phone down onto the windshield of a car, before using his webs to steal the shield from the Captains hands. The screen cuts back to Spider-man in the empty room.
“Yeah. That was fun. But also, never again. Germany sucks.”
A new voice is heard in the distance, a male one. “Do Iron Man!”
The girl voice returns, “Don’t, Spidey. We all know you’re just going to go on this giant rant about how awesome he is.”
Spider-man looks offended, but definitely in an over exaggerated way. He returns to the pile, picking up the Iron Man figurine, and sets him up with the other 4 that had already been chosen. “Yeah, you’re right. He’s pretty awesome.” He also picks up the War Machine figurine, “I would really like to put him on my team, but we already have Iron Man. They’re, like, exactly the same, except one is like, 10 times more popular.” He sets the War Machine figure to the side, and puts it down gently. “Nothing against him!”
“Next, we have Hawkeye.” He picks up the tiny figure, “No powers, but good archer, good aim. I think I will keep him.” He sets the archer down on the table.
“3 to last, we have Wanda. She has super dope powers, but I don’t think she has them under control. Yet, at least.” Spider-man gently puts her next to the War Machine.
“Woah, you can’t just do that. I mean, she’s the Scarlet Witch. She’s so cool!” The girl behind the screen exclaims, before murmuring “maybe even cooler than you…”
“I heard that!”
“Yeah? Fight me.”
Spider-Man jumps over the table, and the scene cuts.
When the camera is back on, Spider-man sits looking mad. Only two mini figures remain undecided. The Falcon, and the Winter Solider.
“Just start already!” The man off-screen shouts.
Spider-man groans, but then picks up the two remaining.
“Only two remain, the Falcon, and the Winter Solider. You might be wondering why they were the last decided, well I have a photo that might pique your interest…” He trails off before the screen cuts to a montage of 3 photos.
The first one is a selfie of Spider-man and the Falcon, with the Falcon webbed up. He looks extremely annoyed, while Spidey was holding up a piece sign.
The second photo was a 0.5 photo of the Falcon tied up, he looked even more pissed, and the photo was slightly blurry, from Spider-man laughing too hard before hand.
The final photo is a selfie of the Winter Solider and Spider-man, the same thing as the selfie with the Falcon. Each photo was transitioned with the vine boom effect.
When the scene cuts back to the room, Spider-man throws the two figures over his shoulder.
“We can’t all be winners, against people who save cats from tress.” Anyone watching could hear the giggle in that joke. “Next time, think before speaking, and don’t get your ass kicked by someone with access to the internet!”
Then the video goes black.
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The video was post at 5:00 AM, the same day as the call with Tony. When Peter checked YouTube after school, at 3:00 PM, the video had nearly 5 million views.
5 million.
Peter almost fainted on the side walk.
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