Growing up made me sick

by Laciatek640

Summary:

A fanfiction about Anne after she comes back to her world. She had let go of her frog family but in reality she can't deal with it mentally. The trauma finally starts to affect her teenage body and she can't take it all at once. The grief slowly starts to kill her. And the real Anne's ghost is always watching her.

Will she handle the tiring emotions?

Will her sweet girls help her go through it all when they also have to fight their fears left from Amphibia?

Read to know the not so sweet story how trauma takes advantage of you and kills you inside and outside.

Chapter 1: The eyes of death.

I walk around a forest. The trees here are big. Maybe even they are touching clouds but it's hard to tell from being down here, on ground. Here I can only see the trunks branches that still have leaves on. But the weather is quite cold and moist. It looks just like a place that I called a "home" even though I wasn't born here. It looks exactly like Amphibia forest with these colorful glowing mushrooms everywhere. I walk past the trees seeing black sky that tells me it's night time. I don't see any single living soul or even hear anyone or beast. 

 

It's quite dark here and the only source of light is a huge moon, stars and the earlier mentioned mushrooms. Wait... It can't be Amphibia. Amphibia doesn't have a moon anymore because I needed to destroy it after the Core wanted to crash it down on this frog land.

 

That's when I felt that something was observing me. I turn around but I can't see anyone. I don't even hear any step. But I already have goosebumps. My skin starts to sweat.

The feeling of someone's eyes staring at me is awfully growing. But my eyes catch only trees.

 

That's when I look up at the sky and see the moon has turned red. No... It can't be! The core... They couldn't survive my attack!

 

Suddenly something touched my arm. Roughly and painfully wrapped around my stomach. And I can swear that it started to hold my neck. The touch was cold and the smell was metallic. My body instantly reacted with adrenaline, my mind was filled with fear and vision got better. I wanted to run but... Oh no... Oh frog, please no! I can't move! I can't move a single muscle in my body. I wanted to scream but I couldn't find my voice. The machine that touched me, made me look up at the moon. The big object starts to fall for only a few seconds before it crashes right into the land. And I swear I can hear every single creature alive here yelling helpless from fear, pain. I smell death everywhere and darkness surrounded me. The metallic person then turns me around to face them. And then I see something I was hoping I would never see. My enemy, my nightmare my murder.

 

The core was standing in front of me, holding me painfully tightly with it's metallic arms. The orange eyes are staring into mine or maybe more into my soul. Suddenly I find my voice.

 

- WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!? - I yell at them. That was the only sentence which I could say before I felt the touch of their not natural hands on my throat, squeezing it tightly. The pain gets worse. I can't take any breath of oxygen. The machine starts at me without a blink.

 

- You are just a kid. You can't do anything. You are just a weak little girl that couldn't even behave in class and you think you could win against me?! - They speak. I feel my fear deepening into my veins. - Your family will never be safe cause of you. You are not a hero.

 

The grip doesn't get lighter, it's otherwise. I feel tears falling down my cheek. My vision gets blurry and I can't hear the voice of the Core, it all turned into a hum. But I can't stop thinking about the sentence "You are just a kid". It's true. I am only a teenager that thought that she can save the world. But now I was again on the edge of death and life. I finally close my eyes.

 

I take a deep breaths of air as I sit up in bed roughly from the nightmare that felt so real. Have I ever had dreams like these? Well not before the whole trip to Amphibia. I would normally dream about having silly adventures with my girls in a mall or some zombie apocalypse that was the worst scenario for a dream. But that was before Amphibia happened. It was before I met my frog family. And before I died. After a month, I still have dreams about the core. Well I wouldn't call them dreams. No. These are nightmares. 

 

I can hardly sleep at night and when I finally do I usually wake up in the middle of the night. Not because of nightmares. I just wake up without a reason. When I have bad dreams I always wake up in the morning even more tired than sleeping for 3-4 hours a day. My parents already took me to the doctor and he gave me pills with melatonin. They don't work at all.

My parents also signed me to therapy. My therapist is very nice but I am not sure if she understands me. When I tell her about a world with big talking frogs she seems... Totally freaked out. Even after the invasion was lived on tv, people still don't really believe in it. 

 

I feel so not understood by everyone, except my best friends. Sasha and Marcy were also in Amphibia and they are the only ones that know what I have lost. And what I had to give up. Marcy was let out of the hospital a week ago. Doctors needed to check if her wounds were healed after King Andrias... Well, stabbed her! But it turned out that whatever Andrias did, he healed her perfectly. Though scars will be left on Marcy's body forever. Going to the topic of scars... Sasha is going out of the hospital in a week. Her body wasn't exactly in a good state after her back was roamed with a fire scythe and also her leg had a cut, made by a fire dagger. Her wounds needed proper healing and it took a whole month! Me and Marcy would often visit her.

 

After all these events most schools were closed due to being quite destroyed. Mine wasn't an exception. Because of the invasion it also got a few issues that needed to be fixed before getting back to being available to be used again. So I was mostly spending time with Marcy or with Sasha in hospital, or sometimes us three in the hospital. Marcy's parents decided that Marcy's mom and her daughter will stay till the end of summer here in LA. And Marcy's dad is already working in the other state. Marcy says that it's more than enough for her but when she says this I can hear some pain in her voice. I also wish that Marcy would never move out but she promised that she will write to me and Sasha everyday. Besides I try not to think about it. We still had a few months before the summer would even start! 

 

I finally got out of bed after a while. My body was all sweaty from the creepy dream and pillows, and plushies were all over the floor next to my bed. Probably when I was moving in my sleep I made them fall down. I make my bed and place everything back on it. My cat Domino was sleeping on one of the pillows so I needed to push her off. That caused her to make a small mad meow in protest of me taking her comfy new bed. 

 

I stretched my arms and yawned. I took fresh clothes and got out of my room. When I opened the door of my bedroom, Domino ran out and rushed to the kitchen. I, on the other hand went to the bathroom and locked the door. I put my things away next to the bathtub and I look up into the mirror. Under my eyes are two big dark circles. A symbol of my sometimes sleepless nights. I lean closer to the mirror to take a better look at my face and I can swear that behind me for a second I saw the orange eyes of the Core. I gasp and close my eyes but when I open them, I can only see myself and the background of my bathroom. I rub my eyes. Another hallucination from not getting any sleep.

 

I wash myself and get ready for the day. Today I start school. Yaaaay... That was the only thing I didn't miss from my universe. It was so weird that I was going back there after 8 months. Oh and of course the whole last month I needed to catch on every material. It was hard but I did it mostly when I was meeting my friends. With their help it was so much better. 

 

I finally decided to go down to the kitchen where my parents already made me breakfast. Typical start of the day in the Thai version. A delicious Khao tom. I mumbled good morning and sat to eat. My mom looks at me and smiles.

 

- Good morning, honey. How was your sleep? Did the pills help? - She asked with a smile that I knew that hide worry.

 

- Not bad. - I lied. -But I was thinking... How about we would double the dose? - I asked hopefully. From just only one pill I didn't feel any effect. I still had sleepless nights or sleep that was even more tiring.

 

- Dear, the doctor said that if they won't help you for the next month at all then he will let you double the dose. For now your body still needs to get more used to it. - My mom said back. Yeah, definitely 'my body needs to get used to it', bullshit. For the whole month I was taking it and I didn't see any effect. Any! But I won't argue with her about it. I just need to somehow live through the whole month without a lot of sleep. How great!

 

- Fine, I will wait then.

 

- Excited that you will go to school again? - This time my dad speaks.

 

- Um, yeah! I will spend more time with Marcy. And Sasha will join us in just a week. - That was the only thing that made school more acceptable.

 

- I'm glad. It's so good going back to normality after all of this. - My dad smiles but I feel tears coming into my eyes like unwanted guests. For them it was going back to normal but for me it was going back to days when Plantars weren't in my life. I swallow my tears and pain in my chest, then I take a few more bites of the food just to quickly take the ready lunch box from the table that my mom made. I rush into my room under the pretext that I need to quickly pack my bag to not get late on my first since 8 months day at school.

 

When I am finally alone in my room, I wipe the tears from the corner of my eyes. Then I start to pack my backpack and put it on my back. I look into the mirror in my room. I can see exactly the same way I looked before the whole adventure in Amphibia. In my school uniform and messy hair. But I know that I am not the same person anymore. I slightly smile to myself when Domino rubs against my leg as of her way of that she agrees with my thoughts. I pet the cat's head and go downstairs where my parents already wait for me to say goodbye.

 

- My daughter grew up so much!

 

- Dad... I am not leaving you two to go to college. I am just going to my old school.

 

- I know, I know. But it's just that I am so proud of you. - My father gives me a tight hug for goodbye and my mom joins us. 

 

- Love you two. 

 

- We love you more. - My mother answers when I leave the house.

 

I walk past houses, trees and other people when I am going to my school. I already texted Marcy that we should meet up under the tree next to school. I wasn't really bluffing when I told my parents that I need to rush to school. I really needed to speed up. In just a few minutes the school's bell will ring.

 

When I got to my school I could see a whole group of people surrounding the tree where I was supposed to meet with Marcy. And when I say surrounded, I really mean it. I got closer to the place but I couldn't see Marcy anywhere.

 

When I was just about to give up and look for her somewhere else, I could hear a small squeak that was like calling my name. Then I saw her, the short, black haired girl with brown eyes that was in the centre of people that looked like they were asking her a lot of questions which Marcy couldn't handle. As a good friend, I decided that I will help her. I rushed into the group of people, took her hand in mine and ran out as if our lives were in danger.

 

- Run! - I yelled without turning my head away. We left the crowd confused but I didn't care at all.

 

Finally after a while I sat with Marcy on the nearest bench. I knew exactly why people were almost taking her every breath away.

 

- Thanks Annie. They again were asking me so many questions about the whole invasion! It's so hard keeping the mr. X version so no one would know the truth about talking frogs! - Said Marcy that was looking like a squished pancake. Mr. X decided that he needs to keep the other universe as a secret. And only mine, Marcy's and Sasha's therapists and doctors were able to know something about a different world and of course my parents. But still many people would bomb me and the girls many questions about me. Especially me. I usually would respond that it was just a movie scene and I was one of the actors. Most people buy it, I mean, who wouldn't? It's easier to think it was a movie and not something real. I sometimes wish that it really would be just a movie. 

 

- No problem, Mar-mar. I bet you are excited about going back to school.

 

- Maybe a little bit... But the most I am excited about the fact that we will see Sashy in just a week! She will finally be able to move out of bed...

 

- Yeah, and on PE we will all sit three together on bench and gossip like always. I got sick leave for a few weeks and you?

 

- Well, I got it for the whole month but Sasha won't be able to do cheerleading for at least 2 months. She said it's okay and at least she will have a lot of time to recover and have more strength but I could see she miss leading the team. - Marcy looked down and I already knew what was on her mind. She was blaming herself for hurting Sasha in her possessed state. Even though Sasha told Marcy dozen of times that it wasn't her but the Core, Marcy would still blame herself.

 

- Don't worry, she will have our company and we will support her though her healing all the time! - I wrapped my arm around Marcy and pat her arm as to signal that she shouldn't get everything so deep into herself. That she isn't alone and neither Sasha is. 

 

Marcy in response smiled a bit and nodded. She looked better but I knew she will blame herself many more times, no matter what I or Sasha will say.

 

was sharing my seat with Marcy in the English class. The black-haired as usual would just play in class on her Nintendo. While I was just doing some silly small sketches of cats in the notebook when the teacher wasn't saying to make any notes. My school break was so long that the class was hard to just stay still in one place and listen for almost an hour about the most boring book written in history. I looked at Marcy playing in the class and for a second I was just staring at her playing. Then I felt like someone was staring at me. I looked up but the teacher was still busy talking about the book and writing something on the board. I started to write notes but I still had a feeling that someone was watching me. But I don't see anyone in the class even looking at me.

 

The desk I was sharing with Marcy was located close to the window in class. After I wrote the notes and got bored of making kittens in the back of the notebook, I still had a feeling that someone was watching me. I tried to brush it off but I wasn't able to collect my mind. I looked out of the window and for a second I could swear I saw a white looking character behind a tree. My blood immediately rushed to my head and I rubbed my eyes. When I opened them, I saw nothing but normal tree and birds flying from bushes to the tree. I took a deep breath in. It must have been just my mind playing with me after almost not having any sleep. Then suddenly I felt something touch my shoulder and I almost jumped.

 

- Anne, you good? You were staring out of the window for like a minute now without blinking. Have you not slept today too? - I realized it was just Marcy being concerned about me.

 

- I am okay. I just thought I saw something interesting outside. And as for my sleep, yep another sleepless night. But I will be okay. The pills will work soon, probably. - I knew I should have told her about my nightmares with the Core but I don't want her to worry more about me or even blame herself. She would immediately start to think back how it was her selfish idea to take us to Amphibia. It's the least I want her to feel. 

 

- Oh, okay. Just take them regularly and they should help. - I nodded and went back to making notes. But I just felt in my bones that the pills won't take me anywhere I want. I gripped the pencil and drew a thick line when suddenly the stylus broke. I cursed under my breath. 

 

 

 

 

 

I was cleaning after dinner with my parents. They had thousands of questions about my day at school. I would just answer them mostly that school was great and many people welcomed me. After I finished drying one last plate, I was finally able to go to my room and relax after a long and boring day. I walked up the stairs with Domino that was following my every step. When I got into my room, I closed the door and threw my back pack next to the desk. I will do my homework later. I didn't turn on any of the lights so my room was a bit dark. I jumped on my bed and laid down to just stare at the ceiling. Then I felt something vibrate in my uniform jacket. I took out my phone that flashed my face with light. On the screen I could see the profile picture of Sasha, that was calling me. I clicked on the green icon and I could immediately hear the happy voice of the blond.

 

- Hi, Annieeee. How was school? You gotta tell me everything about who did what, and all updates you got who dates who, and who had which drama. 

 

- Nice to hear you too, Sash. - I chuckled a bit tired. Of course Sasha would want to know every tea that happened while she was 7 months in Amphibia plus one month being in hospital. She will never change in these terms. - My day was fine. Usual boring school and our lovely Marcy being a nerd. She already got an A+ in math class for doing some extra work.

 

- Ah, yes. Our sweet Mar-mar being all typical her. Some things will never change. But about the gossips...

 

- Yes, yes. I will tell you everything but first I want to know how you are feeling.

 

- Boriiing but fine, I will tell you. I just finished reading another book from Marcy and it was quite cool. There was a warrior that had a dragon! That's why I am calling you so late. I was talking earlier with Marcy about it and we couldn't stop talking about it. But she promised to bring me a sequel. As to going back to my wounds, as usual they made me gulp some vitamins and medicine. And of course my rehabilitator made some exercises with me. But it looks like I will be able to go back to sports and all. Maybe not extreme ones... But still, any sport could be fantastic.

 

- You miss cheerleading huh?

 

- Yeah, but I know my team waits for me! And Stacy... You better get ready because I will take my place back as the captain of cheerleaders! - We both laugh. Stacy was a new captain of cheerleaders when Sasha was absent. But me, Sasha and Marcy know that once Sasha will be able to go back to cheerleading, nothing will stop the Waybright to go back to her old position in the team. She only needs to get in shape.

 

- I bet you will. Nothing can stop you.

 

 

After a call with Sasha, I really needed to do my homework. It was already so late and I was getting tired. My mom already put the pill on my desk right next to the glass with water. I really doubt that maybe this time the melatonin pill will help me. I finally started to do my homework. While I was making it I started to think about the blond. Me and Sasha always could talk for hours. Since we were kids she would protect me and take the lead. But since our fights in Amphibia, she understands she can't control me. And every time we talk I feel she sometimes thinks twice before saying something. Our relationship got stronger since we both changed. I am not a kid that will let everyone do what they want with me. And she isn't the same toxic girl she was. And Marcy? She also changed! She is able to express her needs and wants more. She also doesn't hide so many emotions from us. Not to mention how much more she is able to focus on something and not to almost kill anyone accidentally. I am proud of us all for going so far.

 

Yet I can't help but sometimes feel empty. I feel like a part of me was ripped out when I lost the ability to meet with my other family. Every day when I go to sleep, I look at the Christmas present I got from Sprig that I placed on my night stand. I spend so much time with the Plantars that I know I will never forget them. They are part of me in my heart.

 

I wipe a small tear coming from my eye but also smile to myself when I recall the memories of my frog family. That's when I accidentally hit my sleep pill with my arm and it fell on the floor. I kneel down to take it and when I stand up, but I feel my breath catch in my throat as I look into the widow. There it was again. A white character standing on the roof of my house. But this time, they were way closer to me. I was able to look at it closer. My heartbeat got faster and my blood rushed. I couldn't move, I could only stare at a person that looked exactly like me but with cracks on skin and whole white and glooming.

 

 

Thank you all for reading this chapter! This is my first work here. I hope everyone will like it and will also read another future chapters!

Chapter 2: Baggy clothes.

Notes:

WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS: BLOOD, SH (SELF-HARM), PROBLEMS WITH ACCEPTING YOUR LOOK. PLEASE, IF YOU ARE DEALING WITH PROBLEMS LIKE THESE, GET PROFESSIONAL HELP.

It has been a week since the last time I saw myself. I mean, my old self. The dead self? I don't know how to even call it. But when I saw it, there was no doubt. It was truly me but before the whole death disaster.

When the dead me appeared, she wasn't saying anything. Not even a whisper. She was only staring at me and I was so shocked and scared that I couldn't say anything either. After a few blinks she was away but not my fear. That day I really quickly got to bed praying that I will fall asleep. It must have been just hallucinations from not sleeping much, right?

That day I slept rapidly, I would wake up every hour and not sleep for the next. But I think it quite worked since I haven't seen her since that day. So I had my hopes up that it was just a stupid hallucination. Yeah, it probably was.

As for going to better topics, I will finally see Sasha in school! I was waiting the whole week for that. Marcy is an awesome companion but the best is when there are all three of us. And school was the place that I needed girls the most. A week in school without Sasha was like eating a cake without cream. Plain, dry and awfully not sweet enough. Marcy in this cake was a marmalade, come on, cake needs to have at least one layer of it to be perfect! And when it was all together, it made a perfect cake. Tasty, sweet enough and NOT DRY.

I was sitting in the kitchen eating cereal. My mom was already preparing some things for her work in the restaurant. Probably checking some recipes. In one of the corners of the kitchen were two bowls. One with water and the other with cat food which was Domino eating. I smiled to myself and put my own bowl into the sink. Then I petted my cat's head before I walked out of the kitchen. I quickly got into my room and took a backpack. On the kitchen surface my lunchbox was ready as usual.

- What did you cook today mom? - I asked with a smile. Mom loved to make me lunch boxes.

- Open and you will find the treasure. - My mom also smiles but doesn't look away from her work. After she tells me to open it, I see a small dumplings and in another partition there was mango sticky rice dessert.

- One of my favourites! Thanks mom.

I quickly pack my lunch into my backpack and leave the house in a good mood. I put my headphones on and play a playlist that my girls made me of my favourite singers and bands. I feel a vibration in my pocket of the school uniform jacket and I see a message on the group chat from Sasha: "Gonna be in school in 5 minutes. Be ready to give hugs.". Can the day get even better? I even feel more rested. Today I haven't had any nightmares and I didn't wake up even once at night. Whole of sleep 8 hours of night.

After a while, I am finally in front of the school. I stop and look around the heads of other students looking for one specific. And then I finally saw that blond hair, one-brown one-blue eyed girl with which I had survived literally many fights. Sometimes we fought side by side, and sometimes against each other. But it was a past. A one that was already forgiven and healed, at least that's what I was feeling.

I ran into the arms of Sasha and hugged her tightly. Oh how much I missed her smell and the soft, long, light hair.

- Sashy!

- A-annie! Hi! C-could you lose your grip a bit? I can't breathe! - Sasha yells and I lose my grip a bit. She hugs me back and smiles. - Since when are you so strong huh?

- Maybe you just got fragile!

- Tease me more Boonchuy and you will taste these muscles! - I chuckle at her comment. It was good to see her again and to touch her again. Suddenly my thoughts were cut when a third body joined our hug. It was Marcy that already looked super hyped.

- Sashyyyy!

- Hello, Mar-mar! Missed you, shortie. - Sasha ruffled Marcy's hair and the brown eyed would immediately start to complain about it but also giggled.

- Finally our pack together! - I smile softly. - Don't worry Sash. Even though you weren't here a week. Marcy made a whole plan about who will sit and with who in the classrooms! One time you will sit with me or Marcy or someone else.

- I see that Marcy as always has everything planned. - Sasha chuckles and looks at the black haired. - Maybe you also made a whole plan on paper, hm?

- Well... You guessed! - Marcy takes out of her notebook a paper with every set up of seats and combinations. Me and Sasha can't help but burst out laughing as Marcy stares at us confused. - What? I wouldn't remember it all, okay?

- Whatever you say, nerd. - The blond teases and Marcy just rolls her eyes.

Then the school bell rang and we needed to go to our first class. After all, Marcy's plan was useful for the classes.

 

It was PE time. While the girls in the locker room were changing. Me, Marcy and Sasha were sitting on the bench. We all three had our sick leave so for some time we could sit together here and talk about whatever we want. Well if Marcy wouldn't secretly play some game and Sasha scroll through Instagram. But she didn't really have time for that. The whole day everyone would welcome Sasha finally being back in school. Sasha's popularity didn't even get worse any bit. It was like she was this whole time in school. No trip to another universe. But people were the most shocked about how she wasn't impulsive and aggressive like she used to. Also about her new free hair style without any hairband. And of course they liked her bigger muscles.

Suddenly I felt a pat on my shoulder as all three of us were sitting on the bench. It was Sasha that was glaring at her cheerleader enemy - Stacy. That stare told more than a million words.

- Look at that show of sadness! She can't even properly show my girls the right positions! How did she manage to become the new leader?

- I have no idea. But you are right that it isn't a very pleasant view. - My face twists when one of the girls falls on the floor because of the lack of harmonia.

- Pft, maybe that's why the cheerleaders were asking me so many times today when I will be able to come back.

- Even if their captain would be better, I still think they would choose you over her. - I smile and put my hand on the blonde's shoulder.

- I agree! - Yells Marcy who is focused more on the game on her phone than talking.

- Thanks girls. - Sasha smiles and just for a while we all three sit and watch our classmates playing games.

After a while, suddenly I see the ginger head walking towards me. Maggie. This girl is only a trouble.

- Hi, Boobchuy.

- What do you want? - I ask, I already see the face of Sasha but she doesn't say anything. She trusts that I can handle it by myself.

- I understand why Marcy sits here and Sasha. Marcy has understandable reasons. And Sasha is freshly out of hospital. But you? I think you are the one that PE would only help. - I stare at her shocked. Was she referring to my weight? Even Marcy now looked up from her phone with a confused look. And if Sasha's eyes could kill then Maggie would lay dead in front of my feet already.

- Excuse me?

- I mean that you don't have any injuries that could make you disabled to take part in PE. In fact, you should have extra classes. Just for your health, you know? - I was stunned and shocked. My first thought was "Am I fat?". I knew that I am not slim like other girls. I wasn't stupid, I could see that I am different from Sasha that has literally muscles and Marcy that was like a stick. I already didn't like to look into the mirror and every journey to go shopping was one hell for me. But I didn't hear such a direct comment that I should lose weight.

- Wendy's, you on the other hand should get extra classes of how to make friends. - Sasha immediately stands up for me. Fuck, I feel so humiliated. My classmates are staring at me. Do they also think that I am fat?

- Sheesh, I am just giving advice to our dear Boonchuy.

- No one asked about your advice or opinion.

- You think that after 8 months you can just come back to school and boss me around? And what? Little round Annie can't speak for herself?

- I swear to god... One more word from your filthy lips and I will show you that even if I'm not in shape I can make you feel pain.

- Sasha is right, Maggie. It's not your business my look or if I am exercising on PE or not. No one cares about your shitty advice. - I finally look into Maggie's eyes and speak for myself. I won't let her see that her words affected me.

- Ooo, the cry baby found her voice?

- Yeah, and I am ready to show you your place. Next to me, you are just a nobody. No one truly cares if I exercise or not. If you are so concerned about others health then maybe you will do something useful and join charity events instead of laying your lonely ass around everywhere like a loser?

- You-

- Maggie. Don't make your situation even more tragic than your life already is. - Speaks up Marcy irritated by the ginger's behaviour. Maggie looks enough already pissed off. She mumbles something under her nose and walks away. The classmates stop staring at our bench and I can't help but feel relieved by their lack of interest. Worse, that Maggie's words left a bruise.

- What an idiot. You're not fat Annie. - Sasha's look softened when she looked at me.

- Yeah! You are just a bit squishy! - Marcy hugged me from behind tickling my sides and I giggled.

- I know, I know. Why would I care about her opinion? I am cool the way I am. - I give them a smile but something in my chest aches. Marcy seemed to have bought it as she kept tickling my sides and I tried to push her playful away. But Sasha doesn't seem so sure of my assurances.

After the PE class me and my girls left the locker room. We walked towards the classroom of our next lesson.

- Wait guys! I will go to the snack machine to buy myself a strawberry soda. - Said black haired.

- Strawberry soda? Really? Orange is way better, Mars. - Sasha gave a dirty look at Marcy.

- Sasha, not the soda drama again. - I looked at the blond, already tired.

- Ugh, whatever. - Sasha then makes cute eyes at Marcy. - Can you get me one orange soda? Please?

Marcy hesitated for a second and finally nodded.

- Fine, but you give money back tomorrow.

- Thanks bestieee. - Me and Marcy look at each other. Typical Sasha.

When Marcy walked away from us, me and the blonde sat on the bench. I was playing with my fingers trying not to think of the earlier thing. Sasha seemed to notice that I wasn't really focused on her talking about the new leader of cheerleaders because I saw her hand taking mine and felt a light squeeze on it.

- You can hide feelings in front of Marcy but I know that Maggie's words got into your head. - I look up at Sasha. Of course she knew about my insecurities. And of course, she felt when my mood changed. Damn it Boonchuy.

- I am fine. Really. Sash, I won't care about what Maggie thinks about me. - I lied. It will be better that way. Sasha has her own problems already. She doesn't need to have more because of me.

- You sure? You can always talk to me, remember? - I nodded and smiled, she smiled back. She let go of my hand. - So you better now get your focus on me, Boonchuy! I'm the star now.

I chuckled slightly and tried to focus on her words. I took out my lunch box and started to eat the small dumplings. But I didn't touch the dessert.

 

The rest of the day was good. Girls kept me busy at school. When I wouldn't focus on classes, they would always make me laugh and smile. I am happy that our group is full now. I have the best people by my side. The leading blond and cute nerd. Our trio is freaking awesome. But when I was going back to my house, suddenly my mind didn't have anyone that could keep my mind. So my self critic took good care of that so I won't get bored. Am I still the cry baby?
Gosh why do I still need someone to protect me?
Why that fucking loser can still get to my head?
I thought that I changed in Amphibia, everything was so much better there! I was actually someone.
Why can't I be like the girl from Amphibia I was?
Am I really fat?

I put my headphones on and play music on Spotify. Yeah. Don't think about it. Just don't think about it. Play a comforting playlist and everything will be okay! Awesome. Yeah.

When I walk into my house, my parents welcome me with a smile.

- Hi Anne, how was your day at school?

- Cool dad. Sasha finally was able to go normally to school.

- That's amazing. Poor thing probably needs a lot of your help? - Asked my mom that was placing a pot with dinner on the table.

- Not really. She didn't even need to take a break after walking quite a lot on stairs! - I say as I leave my backpack on the floor in the living room and join my parents at the dinner table.

- Hah, such a brave girl. Have you got any grades today? - My dad smiles and gives me glass with apple juice.

- Well... C in math!

- You could have done a bit better. You are capable of having better grades. - My mom doesn't look up from her plate.

- Awh come on, honey. She would usually have worse grades in math. Let's appreciate that she gets better in her own time. - My dad tries to protect me but my mom doesn't really look like changing her mind. She doesn't say anything and I start to eat.

My stomach after a few bites feels tied. I eat only half of the meal. I don't have an appetite because of my mom's words. I get up from the table and take my backpack.

- Won't you eat more, sweetie? - My dad asked concerned but before I could answer him, my mom already did.

- If she wants to act like a little sulk kid then let her be. - I glared at my mom and immediately left the dinning room. Ugh, I hate when she acts like this.

When I run to my room, tears duck in my eyes. Whatever I will do, I will never be enough for her!

I got under the covers of my bed and started to sob. Why can't she see that I am really trying? I am not the same Anne I was before Amphibia! I really started to pay more attention to the school. Am I really not doing enough? Why can't I get better faster? Like Marcy or Sasha.

I look at my hands. Lower and lower. There they are. Healed scars that will never disappear.

I slide my finger against one of the scars that feels raised. It hurts, not physically but mentally. They were left after my often mental breakdowns. When I would just take the razor and try to punish myself. But soon my mom found out and it took some time that she would trust me again and stop checking if I was still self-harming. Now she didn't do that. And I have learned from my mistakes. Hands are not a good option to do sh. They are easily noticeable.

My therapist doesn't know that I have self injured myself before. My mom didn't tell her about that for some reason, maybe she is ashamed of me doing such a thing? And I don't really trust my therapist. She doesn't seem really good for me. She was mostly taking care of adult people and not teenagers. We just couldn't really understand each other. I tried talking about changing my therapist with my mom but she says I am just trying to bother her on purpose.

Fuck her, fuck all my promises on stopping.

I grab my sharpener and small screwdriver. I unscrew the screws. It was a new sharpener, I haven't used it before so now it will be perfect. I took the blade and went to the bathroom. I quickly took a shower and after coming out, I still left the water flowing so my mother won't think I am spending too much time in the bathroom without purpose. I put on my underwear and t-shirt. I take the razor with my shaking hands. Should I really do it? I have been clean since I came to Amphibia, do I want to really destroy such a long time of being free?

I look into the mirror at myself. I see my messy curly brown hair, big brown eyes and nose but my look goes lower and lower... I look at my round belly. Maggie's words echoed in my head: "I think you are the one that PE would only help.", "You should have extra classes. Just for your health, you know?". Shut up!

I felt tears flowing down my cheeks and falling at the floor. I put the razor on the sink and grab my hair. Then I hug myself and close my eyes crying.

- Why can't I be pretty like other girls? Why can't I be more skinny?! I am disgusting. No wonder my mom is disappointed. How even my friends like me, such an ugly fatty? They are probably ashamed of me. - I sob into my hands as I wipe the unstopping tears. I swallow a lump in my throat and take the razor. I sit on the floor. In anger at myself I start to cut my fat thighs. Nothing will help my look, so who cares if my thighs will also have scars?

I focus my anger on the cuts. It hurts but I know that I deserve it. I deserve the pain for being such a disgusting person. For not being a good enough daughter. For being a cry baby. For being such a loser.

When my anger finally fades and the real pain starts to kick in, I just stare at the scarlet droplets. After a while of just staring at my blood I finally decided to get up to take a wet wipe. But when I look into the mirror again, I freeze. But not because of the fact that my eyes are red and my cheeks wet but because I saw her again. A whole white Anne with cracks and quite glowing, she was standing behind me in the mirror. Again, I can't say anything and neither do she.

I drop the razor from my hand and that's when she disappears. Without thinking I clean my cuts and put on big plasters. I put on my pajama pants and go to my room.

 

At night, I couldn't sleep. No matter how many times I changed my position. I took my sleeping pills but they didn't work at all. Also my thighs were a bit sore.

After another hour I decided to sneak into the kitchen. I knew where my mom puts any medicine. I slowly and quietly opened the shelf that is up the cooker. Yes! I knew she would put the melatonin pills here.

I took the small bottle and took out a pill. Mom won't notice, right?

I take a cup and pour myself a bit of water. I take a sip and swallow the extra melatonin pill. Suddenly the darkness of the kitchen is lit with a lamp. Oh no! Is it my mom? I turn slowly around to see my dad staring at me with a smile.

- You got thirsty? - My dad walked up closer. - Or just couldn't sleep?

- Both. - I smile. My dad wasn't like my mom at all. I could always trust him. But I hope he didn't see me taking one more pill. - How about you?

- Ah, I just got thirsty.

- I get it. - Suddenly I feel my dad wrapping arms around me.

- Hey, little one. I know mom is not an easy woman, I literally married her. But I also know that no matter what she says, she loves you. She only wants the best for you. And for me? You are the best daughter ever. Like come on, what parent has a child that literally saved two universes? And even if you wouldn't. I would still be proud of you.

- Thank you, dad. - I hugged him tightly and relaxed in his grip as he petted my head.

- Now go to your bed and try to sleep.

- I will. - I move away and slowly go upstairs. - Goodnight dad, I love you.

- I love you too, dear.

Notes:

I hope you liked the angst. I am not sorry for anything :3.

 

(Btw, hidden reference to one meme in this chapter)

Chapter 3: Is it my fault?

Notes:

Spoiler for a Sasha's POV mostly in this chapters but it starts with Anne'S POV

I woke up with stinging eyes from tiredness. A three weeks passed since I started to secretly take two pills before sleeping. It worked for a while and I would sleep longer but I think it doesn't really help now. I often get nightmares about my death self. She as usual just stares at me in the silence. But I also was sharing the silence with her. I couldn't speak in my dreams with her. Not even move. At this point I'm just trying to ignore her. She annoys me more than scares me. What does she want from me? I was asking myself that many times and found only answers that didn't sound good at all. Maybe she has some undone business? Maybe she was to see our parents? Or maybe she tries to somehow get back here and destroy her copy - me. When I see her, something arches in my heart. I feel like I took her family, friends and life. I feel like I am just a cheap copy of her. Maybe that's why I am always not good enough for anyone. Because I am a copycat. A fake Anne. Something that shouldn't exist. How pathetic I am, trying to live someone's life. Maybe that's why the original Anne follows me around? Maybe she is also ashamed of how bad a copy I am.

When I got up from my bed, I felt that the whole world spun and got blurry. Also the light from the window felt like a flash in my eyes. I needed to close my eyes and put my hand on my head. After a few seconds it got better and I was able to finally go to the bathroom. I decided to not take a shower, I didn't have the strength. Same to my teeth. One or two days of skipping won't make much of a difference anyway.

While I was walking out of the bathroom I saw my mom in my room.

- Mom?

- Oh, hi dear. - She looks at me and notices I am still in my pyjamas. - You didn't put your uniform yet thankfully.

- What is it? - I look at my mom unsure already noticing how her eyes spark and that's when I notice why she is so happy. Oh, fucking no. She was holding a dress that I never saw before.

- Honey, yesterday I saw this pretty dress and I just knew you would look gorgeous in it. - She passed me the dress in the color of red. It didn't look bad to be honest. But because my mom bought it without asking me, it made me feel that something would be wrong with that dress.

- You want me to try it on, am I right?

- Yes! Come on. - My mom encouraged me but I looked at the tag.

- Mom, it says it's a M size. I wear L's.

- Don't look at that, the size is different in every brand. The M size already looks big enough for you.

- Okay... I will put it on. - I take the dress and go to the bathroom to change myself. After two minutes I went back to my room feeling extremely uncomfortable in the dress. It was tight and felt too small for me. It was also quite short and I felt it was exposing my massive thighs too much. I felt like a whale in that.

- You look awesome, sweetie!

- Mom, it's too tight. I can't breathe in it! It just feels uncomfortable. It's too small.

- You just need to lose a bit of weight and it will fit. Not so long ago I bet you would slide into a dress like this easily. - I instantly felt nauseous when my mom said that. Did she think I gained weight? That I have extra pounds that weren't there before Amphibia? Is it really a problem because of my weight? - This dress will wait for you.

I changed into my uniform and gave the dress to my mom back. She walked out of the room casually, she didn't notice that when she mentioned losing weight, I felt like the most disgusting person living alive. I hate dresses.

 

Sasha's POV:

My alarm on my phone woke me up as usual. I stretched and got up from bed. I started to do small exercises that my doctor told me to do every morning so my form could get better. When I was done, I quickly put on my clothes for school and got to a kitchen where my mom was already working on her laptop drinking her coffee and eating a sandwich.

Dave - my mother's boyfriend already made me a plate of toast and scrambled eggs. Next to it was a glass with orange juice. The room was silent, the only noise was my mom's keyboard and Dave cooking something but no one was talking to each other. It's not like it was something new.

My mom peaked from her laptop to look at me eating and smiled.

- You look beautiful today, Sasha. Well, as always. How is your back?

I looked up from my plate and smiled back at my mom.

- Thanks, mom. Sometimes something arches in my back but mostly it's okay.

- Soon you will be able to go back to cheerleading? - Dave asks while holding the pan.

- Yup, just two more weeks. - I quickly finished my breakfast. - I'm gonna try hard to go back to my leader's place in the cheerleading team.

I take my bag and wave goodbye to my mom and her lover. Then I walk out of the house and take a big breath out, relieved. It's not like I hate Dave. He is a very nice guy and I can see that though I am not his daughter, he tries to be my father figure. But I can't help but wish my real dad would be here sometimes. I know he has a new family now, I even got a new little sister that is 9 years old this year. But I know I will never be so important to him like his new child and wife. I hate him for that but also if I could, I would beg for his love.

When I was at the hospital, he maybe visited me twice. No one knew where I was for 7 months, yet when I was finally found he cared only to pay me two visits. Two fucking visits. Am I not important at all now? I was missing for more than a half of a year but he has his cute little family, perfect one. Of course there is no place for his daughter that deals with anger issues. Or maybe there was never a place for me in his heart at all.

If Grime was there he would spend whole night in hospital even if he couldn't. He would hug me and tell me I will be okay, that I am safe now and with him. He would actually care about me and I wouldn't need to question his love towards me. He was more like a father to me than my own biological one or my mother's boyfriend.

I start to walk faster towards school. My eyes feel dry, I don't cry anymore in these kinds of situations. I used to cry so much at the thought of just my father but now? I couldn't even get one tear out of my eye even if I wanted to. I was so used to not being noticed by my dad that sometimes I feel like nothing will surprise me about him.

When I finally got to school, I noticed my girls sitting in front of the classroom waiting for the class to start and of course for me.

- Hello, ladies.

- Hi, Sashy! - Marcy hugged me tightly and I patted her arm.

- Hi. - Anne responded shortly without any emotions. That means no good.

- Sasha, have you heard?! - Before I could think about Anne's weird behaviour, Marcy was already bouncing in one place with some news.

- Heard about what? WAIT, new gossip?!

- Oh, hell yeah! Broski, I got amazing tea! About your ex. - My curiosity raised. Marcy got tea about my ex? But which one... Before amphibia, I couldn't really have any long deeper relationship, usually it would take me max a month to break up. But at that time I wouldn't really appreciate any relationship.

- My ex?!

- Your ex. To be exact - Juliet.

- No, freaking way. - Juliet was my last girlfriend before getting to the Amphibia. She was with me for the longest, three whole months. I consider her as my first and biggest love ever. She was popular, one of the best students, extremely pretty and a bit sassy. We made a good due, till I found out she wasn't showing me her real side. Manipulator, unloyal, sometimes even sadistic and a massive bitch. Quite like me before I changed but trust me, she was worse. She never had even a slight thought that she could be wrong. We broke up when I found out she was cheating on me with a boy from the football team.

- I heard from my friend from the book club that a teacher caught her smoking vape.

- Damn, this girl isn't getting any better at all. But it's not a big news, unfortunately many teenagers try that stuff.

- Wait! That's not all, the biggest drama is that she stole it from a student that she beat up that much he went to hospital. - As Marcy explained the situation to me, my eyes widened more.

- You are joking.

- No, the principal may throw her out of school. - I grin at the information. This day starts good.

- Deserved.

Ah, how good it will be not to see that face any longer in school. I really hope she will be kicked out. But I can't really be happy from this event because of Anne's silence. She was staring at her shoes all the time I was talking with Marcy and didn't really seem to be walking on earth. I wanted to talk with her but the bell rang. Unfortunately in this class I sit with Marcy so I can't talk with Anne that is acting so weird past weeks.

 

At lunch, me and the girls went to the cafeteria. We took a table that was close to a window that gave a nice look out on the school court. I took out my lunch, a muesli with yoghurt and a small bun with cheese and ham. Marcy had a sandwich with strawberry jam and peanut butter, she would often get that one exact type of sandwich and refused to have something different for lunch. As for Anne... Well, yeah. Anne. She took out her lunch but as we were all three talking, I couldn't help but notice she took maybe three small bites of her food.

- Anne, is everything okay?

- Yeah, why wouldn't it be? - She asks not looking me in the eyes. Marcy went silent feeling that something was off.

- You barely ate your food.

- I am not hungry, I ate a big breakfast at home.

- But it happens often. I see you almost everyday not finishing even half of your food. Anne, that's not normal.

- You keep watching me if I eat? What are you? My mom? I don't need a babysitter to check if I eat right. - Anne says this in a quite aggressive tone and I can't help but be left speechless by her behaviour.

- Sorry... I didn't mean to piss you off. I am just worried, that's all.

- I'm good, thanks for checking but I am completely fine.

- Anne, Sasha is just concerned... - Marcy tried to calm Anne but without any good result. More like the opposite effect of wanted.

- She doesn't need to! I am fine, okay?! Can we just finally close the topic?! - It was if Anne completely changed. She was aggressive verbally. She was almost never speaking with such anger or irritation. Like it would be a problem that I am even speaking to her.

Me and Marcy went silent. I didn't plan to start any drama! I was just worried about her weird behaviour.

- Okay... If you say so. - Marcy decided to finally speak

- Whatever, I am going to the bathroom. - Anne stood up from the table and I watched as she was wobbly walking towards the door of the cafeteria.

I started to wonder. Was she uncomfortable with being around me? Is it my fault that she was feeling so weird? I thought she forgave me for everything that happened in Amphibia. I really changed... Or maybe I am still doing something that annoys her? I would do anything for her. Just one word and I will change, please Anne, tell me what's wrong. Maybe she just doesn't trust me anymore? I did terrible things in Amphibia that I will never forgive myself. So if I can't forgive myself then how does she feel? Maybe she will never forgive me no matter how much I will change.

I stayed in silence with Marcy who stopped eating. Yet again she cut the silence.

- What's wrong with Anne? She starts to worry me. - Marcy looked at me with sad eyes.

- I have no idea. She doesn't want to say anything. And as you saw she starts to become aggressive.

- Do you... Do you think she might've started to do self-harm again? - I felt my heart aching when the black-haired said that. Oh frog, please not again. Marcy's words only made my overthinking raise.

- I hope not. She has been clean for a long time now.

- I know but she was acting like that last time when she was doing that stupid thing.

- Don't worry, Mar-mar. If Anne is doing that shit again, we will stop her. We won't let her ruin herself.

- I bet it's all because of Maggie's words! Ugh, I hate her so much.

- That is possible. I hope we all just overthink that and Anne is just having a bad day.

- Sasha... I am just so worried about our trio. When I'm gonna move away, I am scared you might forget me. - That sudden confession shocked me.

- How can you think about such a thing? - I smile softly at Marcy and wrap my arm around her gently and rub her arm as Marcy cuddles to me. - Marcy, you have nothing to worry about, you are my best friend. My cute nerd. We have known each other since being little. Yes, you will live quite far away from us. But it doesn't mean that we will forget about our goof. To be honest, I am scared you will forget about us.

Marcy looked up at me, meeting my eyes, I felt losing myself in the dark brown puddles. They were so goddamn cute and my heart skipped a beat.

- You are scared that I will forget about you and Anne? - I nod my head a bit.

- You will meet new people there. Maybe someone better than me. Well not Anne, Anne is notable to be switched. - Marcy gasps.

- No way! There are no people that could ever be better than you or Anne!

- There are people that weren't ever toxic or manipulative.

- Yes, but there are no people that never make mistakes. Unworthy people are those that know that they made mistakes but never changed and didn't even try. You apologised, you changed for the better. You are now the best version of yourself. - I felt my heart melt when Marcy said these words.

- Thank you, Marcy. You don't know how much your words mean to me. - I squeeze the brown-eyed girl and she giggles.

- Quit it, Sash! - I wrap my arms around her and whisper to her ear.

- Never! I am gonna tease you to death. - Marcy slightly blushed and I instantly blushed too letting her go. - Ekhem... Do you think we should check on Anne?

- Let's give her a break.

 

Anne POV:

For the last few weeks I have only lied to my girls. But I can't help it. I don't want to bother them with my problems or act like a lame duck.

Now I am standing in front of the mirror in the girl's bathroom. I feel dizzy and nauseous. My head is a bit spinning. I swallow my saliva and look into the mirror where I see my reflection. I hold to the sink as I feel like I'm gonna fall. When I was almost collapsing I suddenly saw in the reflection a white character that held me in place. It was my death self. The real Anne. I took a few deep breaths as I was staring at her in the mirror. She was looking at me with a worried face. I couldn't feel her touch but her presence. Like some extra energy making my body stronger. After a minute I stood up on my own feet and whispered:

- Thank you. - After these two simple words for a second I thought she smiled at me but I couldn't really see as she suddenly disappeared. I was again left alone. But it was the first time I actually said to the ghost. It was really weird but if she ever appears again and I will be able to talk then I want to ask her many things.

I would ask her why she keeps appearing, why always to me? Wouldn't she want to talk with Sasha or Marcy? Or maybe if she is mad at me? But if she would be mad then wouldn't she stare at me in satisfaction as I would collapse? I wonder what she thinks about me and if I will ever be able to ask her that. But I feel we will see each other a few more times.

 

The rest of the day in school I was mostly silent. Sasha and Marcy didn't ask me any more questions about my earlier behaviour. But I could tell by Sasha's eyes that she will come back to the topic soon. As for Marcy I just hoped she thought I had a bad day and won't try to figure out more what could cause me these feelings.

When I was walking out of school without a word of goodbye, Sasha rushed to me.

- Annie, wait, I got a question. - She smiled softly at me and I pried in my mind for her to not wanting to ask me about my mood.

- What is it? - I asked with a tone without emotions.

- Marcy already agreed and I hope you will too. I plan to do a sleepover this weekend. Just our trio, if you agree of course. It's your time to choose a movie! - Sasha's request shocked me a bit. That was something I wasn't expecting at all. My first thought was about my cuts that healed mostly but were seen on the thighs. But any pants or shorts will be able to cover them... Right? And with girls I maybe could forget about the whole ghost-Anne thing and my mom.

- Sounds good... - I responded with a slight smile and Sasha seemed really happy. She hugged me gently.

- Thanks, Annie! - She ruffled my messy curly hair. - See you tomorrow at school.

- Yeah. See you tomorrow. - I smiled and waved goodbye to Marcy that was standing a few steps away. I then walked away towards my house, trying not to think about how to not eat much without girls noticing.

Notes:

THIRD CHAPTER LET'S GOOO.
I hope everyone liked this chapter. It's a bit shorter than others but I will try to write more in the next one. Hope yall will have a good day :P.

Also I thought about naming Sasha's ex Boscha but I was like: "Nah, people won't take this fanfiction seriously."

And yes, I hate smoking teenagers. (Ewewew)

Chapter 4: A moment of honesty.

Notes:

Ummm I might've not posted for a month... BUT BUT I FINALLY WROTE GUYS, I DID IT! AND THE CHAPTER IS THE LONGEST I WROTE. SO PUT THE WEAPONS DOWN.

As usual, I woke up with a stinging thighs. They were sore as again I would punish myself. The old habit came back with double power as I couldn't help but cut my skin almost every week. Yesterday when I came home after school, my mom got mad at me that I don't want to eat dinner. She thought that I was ungrateful for what she does for me. That she cooks and washes my clothes everyday. And only expects from me to be a better daughter. I'm sorry I can't be perfect? I'm trying. I study more often and I eat less so I won't get extra calories. So I will fit your damn dress. I got a B yesterday from an English test. But it was nothing compared to my another C in physics. In my mother's eyes, I think I won't ever be enough.

That's how last night I lost my control and with pure anger I started to slash my thighs like I was my own enemy. I'm now even more mad at myself that I am so vulnerable because of others comments. Why am I such a sensitive crybaby? A total loser.

I got up and changed my pajamas for the normal school uniform. I looked into the mirror. Disgusting. I put on the uniform jacket and quickly rushed down the stairs. I didn't have the energy to brush my teeth. I didn't want to eat either. I felt weak but if I put anything into my stomach, I think I would throw up. It's not like I don't eat at all. I usually eat something that has not many calories and mostly when no one is watching so people won't see the fat pig eating. But before I could get out. I felt someone a bit roughly push me towards themselves.

- Ouch! - I whined as I felt the yank.

- Anne Savisa Boonchuy. Where do you think you are going? - I heard my mom's sharp tone and I felt a sweat dripping from my back.

- S-school... - I stuttered a bit as I was scared of my mother that didn't look happy at all.

- Why aren't you eating lunch at school that I make you everyday? Yesterday I saw your food in the trash can. Anne, what is happening with you?

- It's nothing... I wasn't just hungry and I didn't want to make you mad if you would see I haven't touched the lunchbox and-

- No, Anne. If that will ever happen again, you will get punished. Zero phone, zero laptop, zero wi-fi. No Sasha or Marcy. You will spend the whole weekend with books and family. Finally you will focus on real things like school. - That made me panic instantly. She wanted to take everything that could help me forget about my problems, about my look and weight, about how I am a fat idiot.

- But mom!

- No buts. Argue more and I will do it today. So today I want to see an empty lunch box. And don't even think about throwing it out in school. I will text Sasha if you actually ate. - My mom packed to my backpack the lunchbox and I didn't want to argue so I could just escape to school. - And if you today will come with full lunchbox, you won't sleep at Sasha's place today. Got it?

- Yes mom...

- It's just for your good Anne. Now go to school. - I nodded and got out of the house. I felt my eyes tear up a bit. I hated it! She says it's for my good but I don't feel good at all! Ugh, I hate her for controlling my every damn move! I am so happy I will escape today to Sasha's house.

 

I was after my three classes, sitting on a bench inside school, looking at my biggest task today. Sandwich. Sasha and Marcy were sitting next to me. Marcy on the right, Sasha on the left. I couldn't escape eating it... But what if?

I started to chew the sandwich. Marcy was playing games on her phone and Sasha got up to the snack machine. That was my chance. I rushed to the toilet leaving my lunchbox open. I threw the sandwich to the trashcan and what I chewed I swallowed. I then quickly rushed back to my place. Yes! I did it. Sasha just came back with some chips and Marcy didn't even notice my absence.

I ignored the delicious taste that was left on my tongue. One part of me wished that I shouldn't have swallowed the sandwich, the other side made me feel a bit nauseous after the taste. I just sipped my water as Sasha opened the bag of chips.

- You want some? - She moved the chips into my direction.

- No, thanks. I just ate my sandwich and I am full. - That's when I heard a small vibration from Sasha's phone. I saw her confused face when she checked the notification. She looked at me a bit confused but then her sight got back on the phone. She wrote something back and turned her phone off. I didn't want to ask any questions as I already knew what was going on. My mom probably texted her if I ate the lunch. I hope Sasha won't ask me any questions either.

Maybe my luck is getting better or the Guardian listened to my prayers but Sasha didn't ask me anything that was even close to the topic. Yet I could feel her gaze around me often. Damn it.

I sat in math class, feeling lightheaded. I got up and asked if I can go to the bathroom. When the teacher let me go. I exited the classroom. As I was walking towards the bathroom I was leaning on walls. My legs were shaky and I felt like I'm gonna throw up. The second I entered the bathroom, I couldn't do anything more than collapse on the floor. In my head panic appeared and survival instincts turned on as I tried to call for help or reach something, but the only thing I could touch was air and the cold ground. My view was blurry and I saw white character standing in front of me. That's when my mind turned blank.

Marcy's POV:

Anne in this classroom was sitting with me as she usually had problems with math. She didn't look good today, she was pale and moved wobbly. I was hoping she only got sick after some stale food. But she wasn't coming back for a way too long. Maybe she was dealing with hard food poisoning? I didn't know but something was definitely wrong. I looked at Sasha that was bored in the classroom. I raised my hand which made a few people from class look at me.

- Miss... Anne is not coming back for a long time. Could I check on her? - I asked politely. That's when Sasha woke up from zoning out.

- Miss, could I go with Marcy?

- Sure, sure, go check on her girls. - The teacher waved her hand. Me and Sasha went out of class to check if Anne was fine.

As we walked towards the bathroom I started the talk with Sasha.

- Do you think she's okay? - I asked worried.

- I didn't want to bring up the topic because I just knew Anne would be annoyed but... Her mom texted me if she ate her lunch today.

- She... What? That's really weird. Do you think Anne may...

- I hope not. I don't know if she thinks we are stupid or something but she definitely hides something from us. - Sasha said as she looked like she was deep in her mind, looking for some logical and not hurtful answer about Anne's behaviour. - Marcy, did you see Anne actually eating her sandwich today?

- Uh, I think so, I mean... Um, actually I'm not sure.

- Damn it! - I heard Sasha say loudly as we entered the bathroom, seeing Anne's body unconsciously laying on the ground. The blonde immediately kneeled next to Anne, she shook her  shoulders as Anne was laying on her stomach. My eyes started to water as I felt a sudden panic seeing Anne's body.

Anne groaned as Sasha shook her and I immediately rushed to help Sasha sit up Anne against the wall of the bathroom. Thank frog that she was breathing and she was just waking up.

- Anne! Hey, Anne. Do you hear me? - Sasha said loudly, almost yelling. Anne blinked a few times adjusting her vision to suddenly light.

- Yeah...

- Do you remember what happened?

- I just got here and then I felt weak and fainted...

- Fuck! Anne... Marcy, get her water. - I took from my bag a bottle with water and with my shaking hand I unscrew the cap from the bottle and gently held the bottle while Anne was taking small, slow sips.

- How are you feeling? - I asked worried as I put the cap back.

- Better.

- Anne, how did that happen?

- I don't know, I just felt weak and... It just happened

- Anne. Do you think we are stupid? - Sasha looked mad and I could feel the tension and also how concerned Sasha was.

- No, of course not-

- Then don't hide your problems from us! We know damn well that you aren't okay! Anne, suddenly fainting isn't normal. What if something worse would happen? Like you would fall and hit your head very hard? Or your brain wouldn't get enough oxygen? - Anne went silent, I also didn't know what to say but Sasha started to calm down and speak more softly. - Anne, you gotta tell us what's wrong.

- I'm going to call the teacher and she will call an ambulance- - I got up but Anne grabbed my wrist a bit too tightly for a person who just fainted.

- No! You can't... If you will they will call my mom.

- And what if your mom will know? - That's it, Sasha already saw Anne's sweating and looking more pale than she already was.

- Because... Then she will know that I didn't eat my breakfast. - The brown haired finally admitted her problem and told the truth.

- So you didn't eat that sandwich.

- Yeah, listen It's just... My mom wouldn't let me go to you if she knew I didn't eat it.

- But Anne, your mom is right! You should eat your food. We barely see you eating anything. - I said wanting her to know that she is important to us.

- I know but... You don't know how it is, after I eat anything I feel so guilty and disgusting.

- Awh, Boonchuy, you aren't disgusting. Not even a bit. You don't need to eat with guilt. Eat with pleasure and happiness you deserve. - Sasha sat next to Anne and I did the same.

- Easy to say. You don't look into the mirror and judge a belly which you don't have.

- I may not have a squish, pillow belly like you. But I am also looking into the mirror to just judge myself. But you can't let these thoughts keep your mind in place and stop you from doing anything that makes you happy. - Sasha started to ruffle Anne's hair and I leaned on Anne's shoulder.

- Yeah, Anne. You focus on many things that are meaningless next to your character and skills. Besides your belly isn't any flaw. It's part of you that is making your appearance look better because it's yours. You aren't overweight. - I said as I snuggled into Anne's arm and she put it gently around me.

- Thank you, girls. I'm so happy I have you two. But I can't change my mind in one day even if in your eyes I would be an Aphrodite in person. It's not how it works.

- We know, but at least it's the start of your way to finally accept yourself. Without it, you can't make another step. - Sasha smiled. - Listen, the deal is that we won't call the teacher and tell her anything that happened today. But you will need to eat more often and in our presence. It's not like we want to control you like your mom. We want to support you in every bite. Besides we will eat mostly together. Okay?

- That... Doesn't sound too bad.

- Awesome! Now... Let me give you half of my lunch. - Sasha opens her box and gives it to still sitting on the floor Anne.

At first, Anne looked unsure about the sandwich that Sasha had. She sighed as she was now fighting with her newest biggest enemy. Food. Just as she thought it was a stupid idea and that she doesn't want to even try, she felt two hands on her back. The hands were Sasha's and mine as we rubbed her back gently and made Anne more confident. Anne took a small bite and found herself in heaven of taste. She didn't have such a delicious food for so long. Or maybe it was just her hunger making food taste better than expected.

- This is the best sandwich ever!

- No one will snatch it from you so eat as you please! - Sasha smiles.

After Anne ate, the three of us went back to class. The teacher was asking us a lot of questions but somehow we made up a lie that worked.

I looked at Anne that sat next to me. She looked much better. After this one situation in the bathroom, I knew one thing for sure. I won't let Anne ever starve herself again. NEVER. She didn't deserve that at all. And yet she did all of this, as a punishment.

The worst is that I felt like she didn't tell us everything. Could she hide much more from us? I have no idea but just my thoughts about it made me frustrated. I will keep an eye on Anne, she is way too important to lose her.

 

Anne's POV:

Fuck, they caught me. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.

Why always me? Why? Why did Sasha and Marcy need to see me in such a moment of weakness? I'm so pathetic. I tried to drag them away from my problems and with what I ended up? With them going straight into the school damn bathroom and let them see me laying unconscious on the floor.

Now I'm just going to my house for things for the sleepover and I can go to Sasha's house. I really just want to relax from all these thoughts. And with my friends? It will be much easier. They are a part of my life that I really need the most now.

I went to my room giving my mom a small good morning. In the doorway of my room I saw my fluffy friend. I gently picked up Domino and smiled as I ruffled her fur with my hand. I took a few steps towards my bed to place her there. I then started to pack my clothes, charger and other things. I rushed to the kitchen to pack snacks that my mom bought. I noticed she was distracted and instead of taking one melatonin pill, I took three. I don't want my mom to find out I started to take more pills because I know she would be very mad. But I can't help it, with only one pill I still can't fall asleep. So I secretly take two or three everyday. Thankfully my mom still didn't catch me red-handed. Oh if she only knew...

I gulped slightly. I waved goodbye to my mom.

- Have fun, I hope I won't hear from the miss Waybright any drama about you.

- Don't worry mom! Everything will be good. - I blinked cutely two times to my mom that just sighed and went back to her things. I just quietly got out of the house into the usual path I go to Sasha. Through my favourite park. The day in the park was very peaceful, I could hear birds singing beautiful songs while kids happily played games on the playground or hide in bushes. I held my bag close as I was getting closer to Sasha's house.

After a few minutes of walking I finally got in front of a large one family house. I got up on the stairs and knocked on the door. I could hear a little muffled "Going!" and jumping steps of Sasha rushing from her stairs. The blonde opened the door and smiled excitedly.

- Annie! You're here! Marcy said she might be a little late. Get in.

- Hi Sash. - I smiled back and went inside. Sasha's mother immediately greeted me.

- Hello Anne! Didn't see you for quite a while. Are you hungry? We ordered pizza and it will be in an hour but I don't mind making you a sandwich. - On the word "pizza" my stomach twitched. I didn't eat it for weeks, on one hand it sounded so incredibly good but on the other I knew that eating it will give me pain and later regrets.

-Ah... I'm actually not that hungry
ms. Waybright, I ate at home so no need for the sandwich.

- Okay then dear! Have fun girls. When Marcy comes I will let her in. Remember Sasha that me and Dave will go on a date at 5 pm so you girls have the whole house free till midnight. But when we will be back we won't disturb you.

Sasha nodded to her mom and took my bag as she led me to her bedroom. I sat on her bed which had white wood and many plushies on the mattress. That look and her whole room bought so much comfort for some reason.

- I thought that you don't sleep with plushies because you think it's lame? - I grinned playfully as I saw Sasha roll her eyes with a soft smile.

- I also thought that I don't make mistakes. So now to prove to you my right! I was wrong. Plushies are the best. - Sasha grinned back as she sat next to me. - Besides that... I heard that muscular people with plushies are in trend.

I giggled softly as Sasha started to flex her muscles in front of me with one of her bunny plushies in hand. The bunny had a white fur and a small pink bow. To be honest I found it cute. The plushie also added to her charm.

- Very trendy. - I smiled and took from my bag the snacks and placed it on her desk. That's when I noticed Sasha's face got more serious.

- Anne, we gotta talk. About today's situation in the bathroom. - Sasha said as she put hand on my shoulder.

- Sash, we talked about it already.

- But not alone. - I was silent for a moment as Sasha said that.

- Fine, go on then.

- You said you don't eat because you feel... - Sasha thought about the right words. - bad.

- The word you are looking is fat.

- Anne...

- I know, I know. But I can't help it that I feel that way, okay!? - I said as I felt my eyes water which made Sasha feel even more concerned. She hugged me gently to herself.

- I understand, Annie.

- No, you don't. - I said a bit roughly as I tried to move away from her embrace but I stopped when I felt her hand on my hair, petting my head softly.

- I don't feel the exact way like you but that doesn't make me unusable to understand your emotions and your thoughts. But also try to understand mine. You're really beautiful Anne. You shouldn't push yourself to limits. Instead of immediately thinking you're ugly and trying to do something risky like not eating, just call me. Okay? I might not be much but I will never leave you. Understood?

- Have anyone ever told you that you're a really amazing therapist friend? - I said as I clinged to her looking for even more warmth in her arms. I felt her muscular hands wrap around me softly. I snuggled my face in her chest and breathe her scent into my lungs savoring every piece of this comfort moment. Then I felt her pink like raspberry lips softly pressing against my forehead. I slightly looked up at her into eyes. The spot she kissed on my forehead was burning or was it my body? I felt lost in those brown and blue eyes. Sasha also hypnotised in mine moved slowly towards me. Her head lowering. I could feel hear breath on my nose and lips as she was so close. That's when suddenly Sasha's phone rang and I immediately snapped back to the world and moved away. Sasha's hand that somehow ended braided with mine was now left alone as I made the step back on bed. I could feel cold air on the sweaty hand. Sasha quickly went back to reality as soon as her hand was touching also a cold air. She took her phone.

- It's Marcy, she probably just came and is scared to knock on my door. - Sasha said softly and went downstairs but I could hear something in her voice that told me she also ached for the lack of touch we just shared. I also thought to myself a bit bitterly "Half an hour, huh?".

After a while, I saw Sasha come back with the black-haired girl. Marcy immediately joined me on Sasha's bed.

- Annie! I missed you! - Marcy clung to me and I fell on the bed.

- We didn't see each other in maybe one hour?!

- Too long. - I then heard Sasha groan as she placed Marcy's bag next to mine.

- Marcy! What the hell did you take with yourself? A bag of rocks? I might not lift for some time but damn it, I am not that weak! - Said Sasha is a bit shocked tone at the weight of Marcy's bag. While I wondered how Marcy even was able to walk here with such a heavy bag that even the blonde complained.

- I might've taken a few games, pads and other things...

- How many in question? - I asked with a slight chuckle.

- Twenty....

- Marcy. Love you but we probably won't play TWENTY games today. - Sasha said with a sigh.

- I know! I just couldn't decide which one!

- Marbs, Sasha also has games. - I said as I got up from the bed and started to look though Marcy's bag.

- I know but I wanted to play some of those with you!

- We will probably just end up playing just dance as usual. - Sasha murmured.

- I also downloaded Class of 09... - Marcy said as Sasha immediately looked at her.

- A new game doesn't sound so bad actually! - Sasha immediately said as she started to look for Marcy's phone.
Me and Marcy couldn't help but start to laugh.

 

After hours of playing games and girls supporting me while I was eating pizza I finally felt like all my mom drama, ghost problems and my low self-love faded away. I just relaxed with people I wanted to be the closest. We sat on Sasha's big bed as Sasha was preparing something. It looked like cards? I looked at Marcy that looked as confused as me. Then Sasha turned to me and Marcy holding the deck and taking some out.

- Sash, what's that? - I asked confused.

- When I was at the hospital I started to read about some magic related things. That's when I started to read about tarot cards. - Sasha said as she started to shuffle the cards.

- Really Sasha? - I said as I sighed.

- Come on Anne! It can be fun. - Marcy said optimistically.

- I am just starting this so I only use Major Arcana. Who wants to first?

- I want to! - Marcy moved closer as Sasha started to shuffle the cards even more. Then Sasha slowly took three cards. Temperance, The Fool and The Chariot. - What does that even mean? That I am naive?

Sasha chuckled at Marcy's question.

- No, no, it means something completely different. The first card suggests that you should think about your decisions and what you're doing. If you shouldn't look for something that is in the middle. Golden mean. I think that your spiritual energy wants you to stop overthinking some things. Maybe you have been hard on yourself lately? - Marcy thought about it and nodded.

- Maybe a bit... And the other two?

- The second, The Fool means you have a kid spirit... And that something new will happen. Like your life starts again. Fresh start in two words. And the last card, The Chariot. This card wants you to open to the new adventure coming and new things happening. Maybe also says you should be more bold.

- You think it may have something to do with my moving out?

- Probably. - Said Sasha shrugging. - Now Anne, your turn.

- Guys... Don't you think it's a bit stupid? Or dangerous? - I said as in my mind I saw the face of my ghost.

- Dangerous? Anne, now everyone places themselves tarot cards for fun. Come on, it's just a bit of fun. - Sasha said with a chuckle.

- Fine... If you say so.

- Awesome! Don't worry Anne, I bet cards will see your future brightly. - The blonde picked Marcy's cards and started to again shuffle the cards now for me. Then she slowly and confidently placed three cards: The High Priestess, Judgement and The Magician.

- So what does it mean?

- Okay so, The High Priestess means that you should start to analyze your dreams. That there might be hidden dreams or wants. Judgement says you should finally close the last chapter of your life fully to start something new. And The Magician is the most interesting one. It means that something is watching you but in a good way, it wants to help you pick the right choices in life. - Sasha's words made me shiver as I felt goosebumps on my arms. It felt too oddly accurate. I had weird dreams, I can't stop seeing myself dying and my ghost... Could it be my guardian? No. These are just stupid cards. It can't mean something. Right?

- The last means The Guardian? You know, the one that looks like the ultimate Domino? - Marcy started to wonder.

- Uh, maybe. - I said looking away. Sasha immediately looked more curious.

- Anne, you know something. Did the cards said something that troubles your head? Maybe it was Judgment? - That's it, Sasha could see my signs of any discomfort in seconds. But how will I tell them that? On the other hand, I am tired of dealing with this all alone.

- Actually... Every card is quite right.

- How? - Marcy asked a bit confused.

- You want to tell us something? - Sasha gave me a reassuring look but also was curious.

-Uh, okay. That's a bit of a hard topic and I don't know if you won't make fun of me.

- We would never Anne! - Marcy immediately yelled.

- Marcy is right, whatever it is. I promise we won't laugh.

- Okay, okay so... Um, I often dream about my death. E-especially where The core kills me. - I said slowly, my voice sometimes almost breaking.

- Anne that's... That's terrible. - Marcy hugged me gently.

- That's not all, I also think that I start to lose my mind.

- And why is that? - Asked Sasha as she pet my hair softly.

- I started to see the ghost of... The real Anne. - I felt Sasha grip my hair a bit and Marcy froze. A moment of silence passed like hours.

- The real Anne? You mean... The Anne before you died? - Sasha asked as Marcy was still frozen. The blonde's grip finally stopped.

- Yeah... She sometimes appears and then after a while she disappears. She doesn't say anything. She just, stares. Once when I was feeling unwell and thought I would faint she caught me and I felt like my body was shot with energy. Like she gave me a piece of her spiritual one.

- You don't play a joke on us, right Anne?

- I'm serious! I know it sounds absurd but it's true! I'm tired of seeing my ghost everywhere! Oh frog, maybe instead of a ghost I should say the original Anne. - I said as I felt my eyes water a bit. Sasha hugged me gently.

- Don't talk like that she... She may be the first one but you're also her. You're not some 'copy' of her but part. And there must be a reason for her to follow you like that.

- Maybe she's mad I took her place.

- I don't think so, she wouldn't help you when you felt sick if she would be mad.

- Then why did she suddenly appear in my life? - I said as I wiped a single tear.

- Maybe because you have a hard time? She probably wants to show you she is here for you, she wants to support you.

- You think so?

- I know so. - Sasha held me close gently as Marcy was laying her head on my thighs, Sasha was now ruffling her hair. I also snuggled back to Sasha. - Let's change the topic. It was your turn to choose the movie Anne. What did you choose?

- Ah, I found it on Netflix. It's called "Fanfiction" about a trans boy suffering with anger issues. I heard it's a very good Polish movie.

- Polish? Sounds good to me. Let's watch it then. - Sasha started to search for the movie on her tv. - Did you know my dad is actually polish?

- Really? I knew you had Slavic gens but I didn't really know from which country. - I said a bit shocked.

- Hah, now you know it Annie.

 

Sasha's POV:

After the movie Anne already fell asleep. She was snoring softly under the warm cover while holding one of my plushies. Marcy on the other hand since Anne told us about her 'ghost situation' was mostly quiet. I gently brushed with my hand Anne's forehead and looked at Marcy that was standing on the balcony looking at the stars. I walked up to her.

- Chilling alone? - I asked softly.

- Mhm...

- Is everything okay?

- I'm fine. - Marcy chuckled and waved her hands a few times with energy..

- I can see your mind is occupied with something. - Marcy sighs a bit.

- Just a bit tired, that's all. No need to worry.

- Mar-mar, you will feel better if you tell me.

- But it's not easy to say.

- So something bothers you.

- Okay, you got me. - Marcy's energy faded as she looked back at the stairs and half moon. - I took that away.

- What did you take away? - I asked confused.

- The moon, I took away the moon from amphibians. They don't have it anymore because of The Core.

- So you admit it's The Core's fault, right?

- Sash, you don't understand! It's my fault in the first place because damn it. I let King Andrias manipulate me! And if I weren't that naive... The Core would never take over my body. Amphibia would never lose the moon, Grime would have an arm, Anne... Anne wouldn't die... - I froze. Oh, so that's the problem.

- Marcy, you silly little one. - I ruffled her hair. As she looked at me with teary eyes confused.

- That's not funny! It's all my fault, if not me. You and Anne wouldn't be in Amphibia in the first place.

- And maybe I would still be a bitch that doesn't care about your feelings at all or anyone's feelings. But especially yours, I neglected your needs since we were little... And I treated you not fair compared to Anne. Anne also didn't have an easy time with me.

- But you changed.

- And so did you. Us three needed a push.

- But Anne died, because of me.

- No Marcy, it was The Core's fault.

- But I should never trust King Andrias in the first place! I was so naive and-

- Mar-mar! - I put my hands softly at her cheeks squeezing them to shut her up. - You're a kid. And he used that. You got manipulated because you have a good sweet trusting heart. And that one thing didn't change. I admire you for such an innocent heart.

- You... Admire me for being naive?

- No, I admire you for being good Marcy. Don't blame yourself ever for someone using you when you don't have a clue.

- But I was so stupid.

- Marbs, he was a very good manipulator. And you're just 14 now. He used you but that's not your fault, okay? - I embraced the black-haired cutie and rubbed her back. She sobbed softly into my shoulder. I slowly picked her up as she yelped. - Shhh! You will wake up Anne.

- What are you doing?!

- Taking you to bed, it's late and we need to rest. - I said as I was holding her in bridal style.

- Sash! Your back is not fully healed, you will overwork yourself!

- Oh shush, you weigh like a feather. - I said as I placed Marcy on the bed and heard a crack in my back and swore under my nose.

- Told you! Are you okay?

- I am okay! Nothing hurts. - It was a pure lie. It hurts like hell. But somehow I laid in bed between Anne and Marcy. After a while of silence Marcy whispered to me.

- Thank you, Sasha. Goodnight. - Marcy snuggled as I pet her hair softly. I started to slowly fall asleep as I felt the warmth from both sides. Cuddled Anne and Marcy. If I could I would want to spend every night like that.

Notes:

I'm not sorry for anything. And I put a lot of my headcanons into this chapter so, yeah.
Also I might not post again for long time due to my school year ending and I am a bit busy but I will try to write often! Anyways that chapter was a rollercoaster of emotions.

And xoxo Polish ppl.

Chapter 5: Sunflowers and fallen popcorn.

Summary:

Marcy makes a gift for Anne to make her realize how amazing she is. While Sasha has a drama with her dad.

Notes:

Erm... Hi guys! Last chapter posted in... May? Oh... I JUST GOT LAZY ASS OKAY?! BUT DW KIDS, MOMMA IS GONNA FEED YALL.

Sasha's POV:

The last few days were really good. Anne started to fight her insecurities and Marcy seemed to finally understand that not everything was her fault. These past days were filled with a lot of joy, we started to plan a special day where we would go to an amusement park, cinema and dinner at a pizzeria. Just the three of us having an amazing weekend. When the weekend finally came, I needed to face reality.

When I woke up, it was 11 am. Last night I was up to late hour watching a series that Marcy recommended to me and I got into it almost immediately. Then I lost track of time and before I knew it, it was 5 am. So that's how I ended up with sore red eyes almost in the middle of the day. I turned my phone on and saw a text from Marcy. She wrote "Sash, I needed to take Anne to my house because I wanted to make her a small surprise. So we might be a bit late for the fun but no worries! Max. 30 minutes. Promise!"

I sighed a bit, why did Mar-mar need to surprise Anne at the last minute? But I guess it's too late to protest as I saw she sent the message at 8 am. Poor Anne was probably bombed at that time with notifications from Marcy.

just simply replied to Marcy: "Okay, no worries. I will wait for you two at 2 pm. But I will come over to your house because otherwise you will never come out."

I then got up from my bed and stretched. I started to do small exercises mostly for my back that the doctor recommended to me. After exercising I took a shower and dressed up in a black crop top and white skirt. I brushed my hair and put it in a bun. Then I put sunglasses on my head and took my favourite bag with dogs. The bag also had many pins from Marcy that I would treasure. Next I packed my wallet and other important things like tickets. After a few minutes, I was ready to go down the stairs and go to the kitchen for breakfast.

As I walked into the kitchen, I saw my mom on her phone. She looked up at me and smiled softly.

- Good morning, dear. I made you toast. Eat before they get cold.

- Thanks mom. - I sat on the chair next to her and started to eat.

- Did you have a good sleep?

- Yeah, not a bad one. - I looked up at my mom curiously. She wouldn't usually ask me things like this unless she needed something. - Today I'm going out with girls to the amusement park, remember?

- Ah, yes. About that... - My mom said softly but I could hear a small note of nervousness as suddenly the door bell rang. I looked at my mom confused and got up. I walked up to the door and opened it just to see my father and his daughter, my step sister Molly, standing right in front of me. I swear I could feel the toast I just ate rise to my throat but somehow I swallowed that.

- Dad?

- Sashyyyy! - Molly shouted in a high pitched voice as she hugged me tightly.

- Why you look so confused? Can't father visit his daughter? - My dad said with a chuckle.

- I ask myself that almost every night. - I answered back with crossed arms and unpleasant expression. That's when my mom immediately got into the conversation.

- Okay, so Sasha, this is your small surprise. - My mom said giving me a smile that almost shouted to me that I shouldn't say anything sarcastic or to be mean.

- I heard you, Anne and Marcy go today to amusement park. - My father said as he entered the house and closed the door. Molly still sticked to my legs.

- Yeah, so sorry but no father-daughters time.

- Well you see... We will come with you! - Said my dad with a happy smile as I was left shocked

- Wait... What?

- You heard right! Me and Molly will go with you and your friends! Isn't it cool?

- No, it's not! I planned this day just for me and my friends! - I raised my voice and Molly looked into my eyes with her cute ones that were now sad.

- Sasha! - My mom now shouted and I froze. - Come on, you can see Anne and Marcy everyday at school. What's the problem with taking your dad and little sister?

- I know how to talk with my daughter, Maria. - Said my dad with an annoyed tone. - Come on, bunny. Please, let's spend some time together. I won't embarrass you in front of your friends.

- Sasha just shouldn't talk to you in that way. She sometimes needs a bit of discipline and not only "please" - My mom was now also annoyed by her ex husband.

- Maria... - I didn't let my father finish as I quickly said.

- Okay! Let's go to the amusement park together. - As much as I didn't want my dad to go with me, I even more didn't want my parents to argue like they used to when I was little. That event left trauma forever and I really didn't want to just get a mental breakdown.

- Yay! Sashy, you're the best! - Molly jumped as she rushed to our father's car. I sighed and followed her. My father played with keys in his hands as he also entered the car. As the car started, I couldn't help but swear under my nose. Why did he need to remember about me today? I then started to wonder what Marcy and Anne were doing and what Marcy's surprise was.

Anne's POV:

It was 7.36 am when I woke up to the sound of my phone's ring. At first I thought I overslept for my school. But then I remembered it was the weekend. I looked at my phone's screen to see the name and profile picture of Marcy. I grabbed my phone and clicked the green icon and put the phone close to my ear.

- Hello...? - I said with a sleepy tone.

- Anne! You gotta come to my house immediately!

- Why? What happened? Are you in danger?!

- No, no! But it's very important. I will tell you when you will get here.

- Wait, Marcy- - I tried to say but before I could, Marcy already cancelled the call.

All I could do was just to get up, put clean clothes. I chose a blue t-shirt and bubble white shorts and put it on. I also picked a delicate gold chain necklace and colourful bracelet with plastic beads that I got from Marcy. After putting on my clothes I put my hair into a small ponytail. Then I went to Marcy's house.

After a few minutes of almost running to Marcy's house. I finally got there. I knocked on the door nervously due to this unexpected call from Marcy. Then the black-haired girl opened the door. She had her clothes that she usually would put on whenever she paints. So that's for what I am needed.

- Marcy. I THOUGHT SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED TO YOU. - I shouted as I felt my blood boil a bit.

- Sorry Annie! But this is major request. Get inside please... - Marcy said with a cute voice which I couldn't dismiss.

- Fine, but I am doing this only for you.

- Thanks, Anne!

I followed the girl to her room. Marcy's room was a bit messy with her things thrown around. But then I saw it in the middle of her room, a painting easel with clean canva.

- So, what do I do? - I asked curious.

- Okay, see that chair? - Marcy pointed on a chair that was behind the canva next to the window.

- Yep, you want me to sit on it or something?

- Exactly.

- Okay. - I then walked up to the chair and calmly sat on it. Then Marcy put a big vase with sunflowers into my hands.

- I want you to just sit like that. I want to paint these sunflowers being held.

- Oh? So I just... Hold it like that? - I asked while moving my head into her direction.

- Don't move! - I immediately went back to the past pose stiff.

- Okay, jeez... - I was now sitting like a statue while holding the vase.

Marcy was painting with the most focused face I have ever seen her with. Like when she was solving some puzzles. I was wondering how much time it will all take and if she will let me go to the bathroom any time soon.

It was hard sitting like this for a long time but thankfully Marcy would let me take breaks, but every time when I would try to look at how the process of painting was going, she wouldn't let me even peak.

I was finishing a sandwich which Marcy made for me while watching her finishing painting. Then suddenly we heard doorbell. It must have been Sasha.

Marcy put on a cloth on her canva and gave me a small glare as a threat if I tried to even lift the cover. I held my hands up in a give up gesture. She then rushed to the door as I was swallowing last piece of the food.

Sasha walked into Marcy's room talking about something that must've bring some strong emotions but she stopped as she saw me. It looked like she choked on air and I couldn't help but stare at her back. She looked absolutely gorgeous.

- Hi. - I smiled shyly with slightly blushed cheeks.

- Hello... - She responded almost in a single whisper.

We looked at each other quietly for a while then Sasha noticed the canva with covered cloth.

- What's that?

- Oh, just some small painting... - Said Marcy with a goofy smile.

- You just walked into Marcy using me. - Sasha chuckled and Marcy rolled her eyes.

- Yo, can you show me, Marbles? - To my surprise, Marcy took off the cover from her painting and I could see that Sasha's eyes widened immediately after gazing deep into the painting.

- Wait, can I also see?

- No, wait! Stay here! - The blonde took out her camera and took a picture.

- Now you can check. - Said Marcy proudly. I got up from the chair and put the vase with sunflowers on the desk. Then I quickly walked up to the easel and looked at the painting. To my shock, it wasn't just the vase with flowers, she made a whole art of me holding the flowers.

- Woah... I thought you only wanted to pain the flowers?

- Of course not, you silly! My evil plan was to make you look at yourself from other angle, from angle me and Sasha see you. Your true self. The most brave, kind hearted, loyal person ever existing. - Marcy smiled sincerely and so sweet as she looked into Anne's eyes. Anne thought she will cry from how cute the gesture was and how it melted her heart.

- I don't know what to say... I love this painting.

- It's all yours and only yours. - Said the black haired girl. We all smiled together. Then suddenly, I heard outside a honk sound. I looked out of Marcy's room window and saw the car that I knew I couldn't mix up. It was Mr. Waybright's jeep, the deep blue color so characteristic and familiar that I knew it can't be someone other car. I looked at Sasha confused, Marcy next to me already had an expression of understanding.

- My father needed to step into our plans... Of course today. He took Molly with him and called it "father's day with daughters". More like "father's day of torturing Sasha". - Sasha sighed annoyed as she glanced at the car parked in front of Marcy's house.

- So he will go with us and Molly to the amusement park, cinema and restaurant? - I asked curiously.

- That's right. Could you unclip my belt on the first rollercoaster we will ride on?

- Sashy! Don't even say that, it won't be that bad. - Marcy tried to reassure her and make her feel better.

- I'm telling the truth, anyways. Marcy change into normal clothes and me with Anne will wait in the car. - Marcy nodded and Sasha with Anne went to the blue jeep.

The girls immediately threw themselves into the spirit of fun. Sasha took girls to the smaller rollercoasters first as usual so their brains can get used to the feeling and get drunk on adrenaline. Of course Sasha needed to drag Molly everywhere. I didn't really mind her being around us, Sasha's sister is very nice but I can't say I'm very happy about it. It was supposed to be our day, just the three of us together. I couldn't help but notice how it affected Sasha. The blonde doesn't hate her sister but she definitely has issues that Molly is able to spend more time with their father. It was never easy for Sash to talk about her relationship with parents and so me and Mar mar never really pressed on her to open up.

After a few attractions, we finally decided to go to the one of the most crazy rollercoasters we have ever seen. It has many loops and just from seeing it, I was having jelly legs. But how can a little attraction scare the almighty Anne Boonchuy!

- Sash... Do we need to get on this one? - Molly asked unsure, she was very brave for her age but that definitely scared her off. Sasha rolled her eyes.

- Me and girls really wanted to try out this one. Come on, if you don't like it then just stay here.

- But dad said we should go on every attraction together.

- Just this once stay with dad. - Before Molly could answer Sasha which was already annoyed, the blonde took mine and Marcy's hand and dragged us into the queue for the amazingly scary rollercoaster. I looked at Marcy's face and sighed as we followed Sasha. I hope this won't be a problem later.

After waiting in the line which felt like forever, we finally got into the roller coaster. The workers checked out belts and the ride slowly started. I was sitting with Sasha and I could see her face starting to tense. I was confused as before there were no problems until the attraction sped up.  I started to scream with excitement and Sasha next to me too. But something went wrong when we finished the first loop. Sasha wriggled in her seat with such an energy that I immediately knew that something was wrong. She started to yell for the coaster to stop, I could even hear her crying voice as she panicked. I grabbed her hand in mine and yelled.

- Close your eyes! Everything is okay, we are going to be fine. I'm right here. And I won't let go. - After I said that, Sasha's hand gripped mine like she was holding for her life. But she stopped moving so much, I could hear her breath being very ragged. - Breath slower, you are safe, you will be okay.

Sasha had her eyes shut but didn't move so energetically anymore as I held her hand.

As we got off the rollercoaster, Sasha was shaking and crying, still holding to my hand tightly that it stung. But at that time I couldn't give less of a shit, Sasha was my priority.

- I-I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! I'm the w-worst! - Sasha said breathing rapidly, gasping with cries. I immediately rubbed her hand and made her look at me.

- Hey, hey, it's okay, take breaths with me. Slowly in and out. - Marcy walked up to us as she also got out of the attraction, she tried to put hand on Sasha's shoulder but Sasha immediately moved away like she was frightened by another touch. As if the situation couldn't get even worse, I saw mr. Waybright coming in our way with an angry look while holding Molly's smaller hand.

- Sasha! How could you leave Molly all alone? Why are you so selfish today? - He without seeing Sasha's face yanked a bit Sasha's shoulder so she would face him.

- Do not touch me! - Sasha angrily and frightened slapped his hand off. She moved into my arms without looking.

- Sasha, just breathe with me okay, you are safe. - I rubbed her hand as she looked into my eyes and started to take deep breaths with me, making her calm down a bit. The heterochromic girl's body was shaking. Her father was too taken aback and maybe also scared and confused as to what happened to his daughter that he didn't say anything.

As Sasha started to calm down, I took her to the bench and hugged her crying. Her usually brave and strong body now felt so fragile in my arms. Marcy joined our hug and rubbed Sasha's back reassuringly.

- What happened? - Marcy asked in a worried tone.

- I'm not sure... I just, when we rode on the loop I opened my eyes and saw the ground. I felt like I was falling. I started to have flashbacks when me and Anne had our first sword fight. T-that I fell from that tower. It all felt so real like it was happening again. I was horrified and thought I would die. - Sasha said with a slightly shaky voice.

Sasha's father looked confused but also not so angry anymore. He slowly sat next to us on the bench.

- You often get such attacks? - He asked in a soft tone. Molly sat next to Sasha and took her hand, not really understanding what is happening with her sister but wanting to show support and that she wasn't mad from her earlier behaviour.

- Sometimes, they happen when I'm too high.

- Then why you have decided to go on a place like rollercoaster?

- I didn't got them in long time. I thought that maybe finally they would be away. I just wanted to have fun like a normal teenager...

- Sweetie, why you didn't tell me about these attacks before? - Sasha's father asked while softly placing hand on her's shoulder. Sasha backed off.

- Would you even listen? - Hurt and pain in the blonde's voice. Eyes glassy and watery. Sasha's father silent for a while before softly answering.

- Of course, you are my daughter.

- Only by blood.

- Don't say that. I love you, not because we are related.

- Can you name at least one thing I like? - Sasha's eyes land on her father's face. The pain and reproachful aches his heart.

- You love white chocolate.

- No! I hate white chocolate! Molly likes white chocolate. - Sasha raised her voice, causing Molly to flinch. - Oh Frog, you can't even pretend that you care.

- I really do care!

- Then show it! You can even properly hug me!

- I can hug you if you want to.

- Ugh! You don't understand! I want you to hug me not because I ask you but because you know I need it! Because you care! Because you see how much I need it! - Sasha cried and her father hugged her, she tried to push him away but after a few seconds she stopped. She let her body fall into his arms. Her cries muffled, not caring that some people might see her. Me and Marcy silently watched with pity. Molly looked a bit guilty. Like it would be her fault for Sasha's bad relationship with their father.

- I'm sorry for being a shitty dad. I never wanted to hurt you. I know words won't fix so many mistakes. I know that nothing will change the past. But I want you to feel like you have a father. Like I'm really here for you. You can share anything with me. I will listen to you always. I want to know your every single wish and complaint. Because believe me or not, I love you. My beautiful angel.

- I'm sorry... - Sasha curls up in her father's arms.

- There is nothing to be sorry about, dear.

 

After the incident we had enough fun in the amusement park. We went to the cinema for the new movie. Sasha's father asked her a lot of things about what happened in Amphibia. Especially her attacks of panic. Everyone would listen, even Molly that seemed very worried about her half sister.

Me and Sasha took a set together. Some popcorn and a big cola cup. We both knew that this would be enough for us. Marcy took for herself Nacho's with cheese. Typical Marcy hating on the caramel popcorn that me and Sasha took. As Mar-mar kept her yapping about why we are disgusting, I could see in Sasha's eyes her sparkle going back. I felt relieved seeing her beautiful smile and delicate laugh. These sweet blue and brown eyes have so much to tell just by one look. I could stare for hours looking for comfort I knew I would always find in her. My sweet girl.

- Anne, you dork. You are going or not? - Sasha asked as she caught me staring at her.

- Uhh! Coming! - My cheeks flush slightly red as I rushed towards the girls that were already entering the cinema hall.

We find our seats and relax in them. I sit next to Sasha that sits next to her father. Marcy sits next to my right and next to her Sasha's little sister. As the hall darkens, I groan to see another marathon of ads. Legal source but even after paying a lot of money you get ads.

 

After watching the movie I get out of the hall with the girls.

- I thought this would be more spectacular... I don't get the hype in social media. - I say casually.

- I mean it wasn't bad but... Yea. - Sasha says as she throws the empty popcorn box into the trash can.

- Social media will always trick us. - Commented Marcy and we just simply nod.

- So girls, want to eat something more filling? - Asked Sasha's father with a small smile.

- Sure, I want to eat some dinner. - Sasha responded immediately.

We went from the cinema area to the mall gallery. We walked next to several shops. We could see Marcy's eyes shine while walking next to the comic shop. A mental note in my head to check out that place later so our little ball of sunshine could admire everything what the store got.

As we finally got to the part where the restaurants are, I felt my stomach rumbling. A popcorn is nothing compared to filling meal we will finally have. I couldn't help but drool just from the thought of it. Sometimes voices of my self critic would still be with me, loudly trying to make me feel bad for even a bit of food. But I got everything I need, my friends that will always be here for me to remind I don't need to look like a super model for them to be loved. That is very reassuring.

We find a free table and take a seat. Marcy and Sasha sat together and I sat next to Molly. Her father sat next to her and was looking at the restaurant. Me and my friends started to debate what pizza we should get. Finally we decided to take a huge pepperoni and some drinks. I chose a chocolate milkshake, Sasha and Marcy went with the same option and took strawberry for Sasha and classic vanilla for Mars. Sasha's father and Molly decided to both take cola.

We patiently waited for the food to be delivered by the waiter. First we got our drinks and I could already hear Sasha teasing Marcy about the sweet milkshake and encouraging her to dig in. As Marcy started to vigorously sip on it, after a while she placed her hands on her head. From my lips escaped a giggle.

- Ow! My head! Freezing! - Marcy said loudly and Sasha laughed.

- Should have been slow, you nerd! - Sasha teased as she softly rubbed the black haired girl's head. - Better?

- It doesn't really work like that... But yeah. Thanks, Sash.

- No problem, I'm always going to be your knight in shining armour.

- Quit it, love birds! - I teased them both. I could see Marcy's cheeks flush red and I grinned a bit. Sasha almost choked on her shake.

- Ugh! I think I got some in my nose! - Sasha groaned annoyed and I couldn't contain my laugh anymore. - We will see how you will laugh when I ruffle your hair Boonchuy!

I giggled but squeaked when Sasha got up.

- No! Get away! You will destroy my hair! - I tried to push her away as she started to ruffle my hair. - Ah! Sasha! Stop!

Sasha laughed sinisterly as she destroyed my hairstyle. She stopped when finally a waitress brought the food for us. The blonde sat at her place again and looked hungrily at the food. I huffed and started to fix my hair that was turned towards four sides of the world.

We started to share the pizza, Molly ate the same pizza with us while Sasha's dad was eating spaghetti.

Just after a while, the pizza had only a last piece left. The amazing taste left on my lips and my stomach full of warm food made me smile.

Molly reached for the last piece, as she almost had it, she didn't notice that the cola bottle was very close to her elbow and she accidentally knocked off the bottle that spilled right on me. I was shocked and gasped slightly as the sweet drink was dripping down on the floor from my clothes. I cursed quietly under my nose as I already felt that I will be sticky.

- Molly! - Sasha yelled angrily at the younger girl's cluelessness.

- I'm sorry, Anne! I didn't mean to! - Molly immediately started to wipe my clothes.

- It's okay, Molly. I know you didn't do that on purpose. I better go clean up in the bathroom. - I got up and quickly went to toilet. I only heard Molly's father scold her and make her clean up the mess.

As I entered the bathroom, I was relieved it was empty. I was embarrassed that I now had ruined clothes and even worse that I now needed to clean my shorts which hide under it my scars that I don't want anyone to know about. Thankfully they are now healed so it doesn't hurt from the soda. But if anyone would just look a bit higher they would be easily seen.

I quickly started to wipe vigorously my clothes, already knowing that once I get home I will need to take a shower.

While I was whipping my shorts, I needed to lift them a bit so I could clean better. Suddenly I heard a voice from which I jumped.

- Anne, are you okay- - Sasha's eyes widen when she notices my scars on thighs. I immediately let go of the trouser leg in shock. Fuck, she saw it.

We were silent for a few seconds. I was too scared to say anything. Sasha walked closer to me.

- Lift it again and show me. - Sasha said firmly, I knew she wasn't asking. I gulped and lifted the shorts a bit. Sasha examined the scars, I knew she won't believe me if I say it's Domino's fault. Lying won't do anything here.

- Sasha... I can explain. I was just so stressed and...

- Fuck, Anne! - Sasha shouted, I was startled by her tone. - I thought you stopped! Don't you think hands were enough? You know how stupid it is! You know how it destroys you!

- I know! I just couldn't help myself okay?! I was too weak!

- Damn it! You went back to the previous state, you understand that!?

- I know I messed up! I just didn't get any more strength to stop myself from doing this!

- I don't know what hurts me more, that you have done that or that you didn't tell me how you feel and what you did! If you would tell me how you have messed up your mind and you need support I would run to your house no matter what hour it would be!

- Don't say that Sasha... - I can see how she tears up.

- But that's true Anne! Don't you see how much I fucking care about you? And yet you don't even trust me to tell me you do this? What about your therapist?

- She doesn't know. I don't like her.

- Why didn't you tell your parents so they would change the therapist?

- I don't want to make trouble. Besides I'm so tired of all this therapy, medicine. Everything!

- Fuck, you need it! Don't you understand that if you won't even try for your health then you will stay feeling like that forever!

- Not if I kill myself! - I shouted out clueless I actually said that. Sasha looked at me dumbfounded. - I'm sorry... I'm just so tired Sasha.

- Don't say that ever again. I can't live without you, okay?

- I'm sorry.

- Don't apologise, just stay!

- I don't know how much more I can take, Sash.

- Maybe I should talk with your mom... - As Sasha said that, I immediately shouted angrily.

- Don't you dare! She won't understand!

- I just try to suggest something logical.

- Sasha! Just let me stay the way it is.

- Are you crazy? I won't let you destroy yourself like that! If you will stay like that I will seriously go to your parents and tell them everything! - I looked at her shocked. It hurt even more than any punch I faced. Like another betrayal.

- That was a low move. - My expression changes to cold and stern. Sasha noticed it and panicked.

- I'm sorry, Anne! I'm just worried about you, okay? Where are you going?! Wait, Anne! - Sasha yelled as I rushed out of the bathroom and took my bag from the table. I then without a word ran out of the restaurant, leaving Marcy, Molly and her father shocked.

Notes:

Sashanne drama is something I had stuck in my head.
Btw I plan a sashanne one shot so be prepared! (I will try to post more often)

Chapter 6: Rely on your love, not someone's.

Notes:

Uhhh last chapter guys! Sorry for long wait but school and stuff. Anyways warning for suicide and gays (listening to Queen "Don't try suicide" makes it quite ironic lol.)

Marcy's POV:

Since the weekend, everything changed into a complicated weird thing that I didn't truly understand. It started on Monday when Anne wouldn't talk with me or Sasha. Wouldn't text or even look at us. It was apparently because of what happened on the weekend in the bathroom. It all just started to be confusing because I could't stop thinking about Sasha and worry for Anne.

- You were the last to talk with her, what happened? - I asked Sasha on one of the school breaks.

- Nothing. - Sasha mumbled but I could feel everything was wrong. I tried many times already to talk about it with her but she seemed to be too uncomfortable. But I had enough. Both of my girls are acting all weird and I don't have a clue why, It's frustrating!

- Such a nothing that Anne doesn't talk with us now? I'm not stupid, Sash.

- I know you aren't. It's just... It's complicated. - Sasha's leg was bouncing up and down in stress.

- I'm here to listen. - I said as I sat next to her and took her hand. - You know you aren't the only person in the world that can't talk about feelings? You always listen to me so let me do the same. - I smiled gently at the girl that looked now so in distress.

- Okay, fine. I will tell you, but this is a secret. - Sasha looked at me with a firm face and I nodded slowly. - So basically, when I walked into the bathroom, I saw Anne's scars.

- Oh... , but It's not like we see them for the first time. - I raised an eyebrow remembering how Anne used to struggle with being away from blade.

- A new scars.

- What?! What do you mean new?! - I raised my voice on the school field.

- Shhh! Not so loud! Everyone will hear you. - The half-blue half-brown-eyed girl gently puts her finger on my lips to shush me.

- Sorry, sorry. But what do you mean new? She doesn't even cover her hands anymore.

- They weren't at her hands but at thighs. She started to cut there. So I confronted her about it immediately. And I yelled at her... - Sasha looked guilty, her eyes quickly moving on my face but not my eyes.

- Oh, Sashy... It's okay, you were shocked. I don't know what I would do in that situation.

- But still, I yelled at her. I probably scared her. She said she was stressed. And that her therapist is shitty and... And- - Sasha's voice broke as tears slowly started to form in her eyes. I gripped her hand tighter and nuzzled into her arm to comfort her.

- Listen, it's not your fault. - I said in even softer tone.dd

- But I didn't even notice that she started to do it again! You understand? Again! - Sasha wrapped her arms around me as she hugged me tightly.

- Me neither, don't be hard on yourself.

- But maybe if I did, then now she wouldn't be in this situation. Maybe she would be more healed.

- Sasha, you can't control Anne's choices. Only she can. We can only support her and hope for the best while being company in her journey. You just can't shake someone's dice and think it will work.

- I know, but still, I wish she had shared such a secret with me before. That I wouldn't find out on my own.

- She was probably scared. It's hard to admit she lost control AGAIN.

That conversation was a week ago. We tried to speak to Anne but she would always run away or hide somewhere. Oh frog, this girl...
She even wouldn't read mine or Sasha's messages.

In the meantime, I decided we can't let Anne part away from us. I won't lose her. Such an action can't ruin our years of friendship, we went through worse.

- Sasha! - I rushed to her though the hallway, panting slightly. I really need to work on my stamina. - Today at my house, after school.

- What? Why? - The blonde asked confused.

- I got a plan that I need to discuss with you. It's about Anne. - I said gasping for air, face all red.

- Alright. I trust your plans like no one's. - Sasha chuckled at my condition. Oh frog, her cute laugh.

I nodded firmly and walked away. I had figured out how to confront Anne. But also finally make her actually listen what we have to say. There was also other reason for that I wanted to see Sasha. I think I got a big crush on her for a while now.

When Anne week ago implied that me and Sasha are lovebirds, I couldn't get the idea out of my head. Me and Sasha? I am a nerd and she is a dang cheeleader. Someone who is popular.

Yet I couldn't since then stop thinking how it would be to actually be with her. To kiss this raspberry lips, hold her colder than mine hand. Just wondering how it would feel to be in her arms makes my heart flutter. That all sounds amazing but also terrifying. What if Sasha won't feel the same and just reject me. Or worse, she will start to look at me weirdly. I don't want to lose her just because of some stupid crush. Yet, I want to tell her.

Besides Sasha isn't the type to make fun of someone's feelings. Even if she will reject me, she will do it with respect. And I feel the need to tell her about my admiration towards her. If I won't do any move I will always only have theory and I can't base on that!

 

Sasha walked up to the door and knocked on it. She wondered if Marcy's plan will ever work considering Anne's stubborn behavior, she had enough of that and hoped that everything will go back to normal.

After a few seconds I opened the door and blushed when I saw Sasha free, messy hair and in casual clothes. Oh, frog, she's sooo handsome!

- Come in, I have snacks and AriZona. - I said as I moved out of the door frame, allowing Sasha to walk in and close door after her.

-AriZona? Damn, how did you know I had a craving of that all day. - The blonde smiled with slight smirk.

- Maybe I just know you so well that I read your mind?

- Oh you sure do, Mar-mar. - Sasha ruffled my black hair and I couldn't help but melt. - Let's go to your room.

 

Sasha sat on top of my bed as I brought the glasses and AriZona. I settled it next to the snack on my desk. Sasha threw her back on the bed.

- So what's the plan?

- What plan?

- Anne plan.

- Oh, yeah! So the plan is quite simple.

Sasha nodded her head for me to continue.

- We need to go to Anne's house, there she won't be able to run away without an confrontation.

- What if she won't let us in and act like she isn't home like on Wednesday? - Sasha asked reminding of how once we already tried that, being desperate.

- Tomorrow Anne's mom will be all day in house, she will always let us in.

- I won't even ask how did you know that... But fine, let's say we will be in, next what?

- She will need to listen whether she likes it or not. We don't have a choice but to press on her a bit.

- She definitely won't like that. - Sasha said munching on the potato chips and looking at my Rubik's cube.

- I know. But we need her to understand that she can't just stop talking to us. We are here for her and it will never change. I know she's probably trying now to push us away because she doesn't want us to worry, but damn frog we are even more worried because of that! That girl really needs to communicate more about her feelings and problems.

Sasha sighed, worry in her voice was easy to notice.

- Tell me about it. It's like she thinks she can do everything by herself when in reality she is really suffering right now and NEEDS our help. She's just stubborn and worried too much about everything.

- We can't do much than just support her. Maybe after we will talk with her how we really feel about it, she will actually listen.

- Let's hope so.

I looked at Sasha that left the cube and now was just staring at me with those eyes. It made my cheeks heat up. It's time to tell her finally about my feelings. It's either now or never. Later I won't even try. I coughed to shake off some of my stress.

- Eh, Sash? - I said with shaky voice and squeezed throat.

- Hm, yea? - The blonde said rising her head up more.

- There is something more I need to tell you. Just promise you won't be mad, okay?

- Now you got me really worried. - Sasha sat up, getting more serious.

- Please, promise.

- Okay, I promise. Just tell me whatever it is, you know you can trust me.

- The things is... I think, no. I know that I like you. Like, like you. You know, not like a friend does, more like a girlfriend. - I look up seeing Sasha's widened up eyes, pure shock. SHIT. She definitely didn't expect that.

- Oh, wow, I definitely didn't expect you to say that. - Sasha looked flustered the same as I.

- I will understand if you don't feel the same as I do. I don't expect anything to be honest.

- Mar-mar.

- You might see me only as a friend and I'm going to be happy if we will stay like this.

- Marcy.

- Please, just don't hate me for it. I know that's a lot to take in and-

- MARCY! - Sasha raised her voice and I froze. - Let me speak. You mean a lot to me, you know that, right?

I nodded, tears slowly appearing in my eyes, I knew it, she's going to reject me.

- I have never wondered how you could be with someone like me, we are friends since little. This confession is a huge shock to me.

- I can give you more time to think-

- No, No. Let me finish. - Sasha smiled gently and I nodded. - But I really like you too. In more than a friend way. Romantically.

I gasped. This girl, Sasha Waybright. She loves me!

- Really? - I said even more shocked.

- Yes really, you goose.

- Even though I will need to move after summer? - I looked worried into her eyes but she only smiled.

- Even then, it will be hard but I would visit you as much as I could. Through there is one problem. - Sasha blushed and looked embarrassed.

- What problem?

- Well, you see... I also like Anne. Like more. And you both mean much for me, really.

- Oh, I see. So you want us... both? - I said a bit shocked. I knew they both were closed but I didn't expect Sasha to like Anne romantically.

- I mean, only if you will agree. I have no idea if you like Anne this way. If you won't then I will understand and not push you.

- Like in a triangle? - I asked confused a bit. Be with Sasha and Anne? It seems not that bad... I mean more to cuddle and pamper you. But is even Anne poly?

- Well, yeah... - Sasha said looking down at her hands.

- We could try... Only if Anne will agree through. It may be a shock to her that her two best friends want date her.

- You really don't mind? You seem very chill about it.

- It's not like I didn't think about it before. Besides I'm quite open to it. Some of my online friends are in polyamorous relationships and it's good for them! Besides only you and Anne are someone I would trust this much.

- The big unknown is Anne here. What if she will think we are weirdos?

- Anne isn't like that at all. - I sit next to Sasha and rub her shoulder.

- I know, I just... - Sasha sighs and wraps arm around my waist, pulling me closer. - It's all worring and stressful.

- We are gonna be okay. - I smile reassuringly. She smiles back with affection in her eyes.

- So we are now gfs, eh? - The blonde said as she pulled my smaller body to her lap and locked her arms around me.

- Looks like we are. - I giggle.

- You know you will be now squished and hugged all day? - Sasha chuckles and presses her nose into my soft black curls.

- You think I see it as something bad? More like a challange!

- You goofball.

 

Anne's POV:

 

Shit. Everything is damn shit. My life is shit. I'm destroying someone's body, trying to believe it's my own, like I ever had something that I can call mine. Since I don't talk with Sasha or Marcy everything in my head is like a constant reminder of how miserable I am. I am not even sure why I don't talk with them anymore. Maybe I am angry at Sasha for being always around me acting like I am a made out of glass. Or maybe I am angry at myself for being such a loser. I can't eat something without thinking how it will affect my body. I can't sleep without taking damn sleep pills. I hate waking up all sweaty from dreaming about my own ghost. All I can think of is how everything is shitty and never going the way I wish it would. It's like I am supposed to fail at living. I get so angry at the smallest things. Tired of everything around me. I wouldn't be surprised if Sasha and Marcy would just leave me because of how annoying it must be to act so delicately with me, to deal with my behavior and constant venting. Oh frog Anne! Stop thinking all about yourself. Marcy will soon leave the LA, Sasha is dealing with her own family and you? You just cry like a damn baby all the time! All you can think of is your own butt? Stupid idiot. All you do is worry them and give more problems. Even your own therapist isn't able to help you. How pathetic.

 

It's another Friday today. And I still didn't even look at my own friends. I run away like a damn coward. My hair is messy and outfit nothing special. I check my lunchbox but immediately throw the food back into my bag. I don't want to eat now. I feel like I would vomit if I ate anything. How much longer can I hold back from seeing Sasha and Marcy? But I really don't want to worry them with my problems. I don't want to be their trouble again.

I sit on the bench in a hallway, sighing. That's when I spot Maggie going towards my direction. Seriously? This world wants to beat the shit out of me.

-Awh, look what we have here. Our little Boonchuy alone again. Did your friends had enough of you? - Maggie mocks.

- Cut it. I'm not in the mood.

- Of course, you need to get the special treatment because you go to therapist. Such an emo.

- You clearly don't have any idea what emo is. Besides I'm not an emo. Stop trying to irritate me, asshole. - I huff and roll my eyes, annoyed by her behavior,

- Gosh, you are so sensitive and easy to rile up. Maybe that's why Sasha and that shortie don't talk with you anymore. - The ginger sneers.

- Don't you have anything better to do? Or you can't live a day without being annoying bitch. - I said, blood boiling. I swear I want to wipe off her smug grin on this floor. Some people started to feel the tension building and quickly their attention was full on us. A circle around me and Maggie forming.

- Look at you, so mad over nothing. Maybe you will go cry to teachers, huh?

- Oh for frog's sake shut up! - With impuls I got up and pushed Maggie roughly, not enough to make her fall but definitely enough to piss her off. She gritted her teeth, looking furious.

- Who the hell do you think you are? - Suddenly she yanked my hair and I yelped.

- Let go of my hair! - I tried to make her pull away from me but I was bursting with anger and energy in my hands that I couldn't hold. Without second thought I punched the ginger's face. She groaned and wrapped her hands around nose in pain. The look in her eyes told me everything. I'm screwed.

- You crazy bitch! That's enough you weirdo. - The girl pushed my back right into lockers. My head hit the metal and vision went blank for a second. Without being able to react quickly, she started to yank my hair again, digging her nails into my scalp. I yell with pain as people around us start to cheer, wondering who will win. Sick fuckers, humans in true form. I tried to do anything, I kicked and squirmed, moved and punched the air. But she wouldn't let me go. I could see the clear satisfaction in her eyes. I closed my eyes, slowly giving up.

Then I could hear a loud gasps from people. Grip from my hair gone and powerful thump, like someone falling. My eyes open, slight blur fading, revealing no one other but Sasha holding the gingers hair that was now sitting on the floor. Maggie's nose was flowing down with blood. The hallway was silent. It was cut by the blonde's words.

- Get your filthy hands away from my girl. Or I will make you lick the floor across the hallway. - Sasha said while pulling the girl's hair more. The ginger cried in pain as droplets of blood ruined her school uniform. - Not nice when someone is treating you like a punch bag, huh?

I was too stunned to speak. My eyes were wide and a few seconds needed to pass for me to notice Marcy behind Sasha. A look full of worry she gave me, as she immediately rushed to me. The black haired girl gently inspected my face. I didn't know what to say when she started to ask me questions.

- Anne! Are you okay? Oh my frog, you are bleeding! - I then looked down at my skirt, noticing a droplet of the crimson liquid. I put my fingers on my face, next to my nose I feel blood. As I lick my lips I find a little cut, leaving metallic taste. - You need to go to the nurse!

- No, no... I will be okay. - I said panicking. If my mom will find out...

- Oh hell no, Boonchuy. You go or I will carry you there. Under your eye you got a bruise. - Sasha said firmly, still holding the huffing mad ginger.

- Let go of me, psycho! - Maggie said.

That's when the director appeared. She looked in disbelief at us.

- Seriously? Sasha, let go off Maggie. - The director gave a Sasha glare. Clearly the blonde wasn't really happy to let the girl's hair as she did it with rough, last push. - Everybody to classes! Except you four.

Everyone around us quickly walked to classrooms, some looking behind themselves just to watch more of the drama. The director sighed tired.

- First we will go to the nurse. TOGETHER. I don't trust any of you to be left alone. I don't need a murder case here. - We all follow our director to the nurse that firstly took care of me as I had more injuries. If Sasha's glare would kill, Maggie would be lying dead. The tension was so thick it could be cut with knife.

I sit on the bed with ice pad on my nape, slightly tilled forward. The nurse pushes a cotton to my nose, cleaning it. Another ice pad I am holding to my eye that slowly turns purple. The ginger seems satisfied with the damage she made and Sasha seems like dreaming of twisting Maggie's neck. As the nurse went to Maggie, the director asked.

- Now, how did it all happen? - The woman stood tall with crossed arms. Maggie was the first to speak up.

- That freak attacked me out of nowhere! - Maggie rises her voice. My eyes widen in disbelief.

- That's not true! Miss, she insulted me and then provoked to attack! - I try to defend myself but the director rises hand up for us to be quiet.

- No yelling, I don't want to get a headache. Why always you four need to be mean to each other and go into violence or insults?

- Some people just can't help but get into someones business. - Sasha commented glaring at Maggie.

- I get it that you don't need to like everybody. But insulting and fighting will get you nowhere.

- So what should I do when she insults me? - I ask, getting angry.

- Ignore or tell to me. - The director said. I huff, yeah if that would work.

- With respect miss, but kids would eat Anne alive if she would tell any teacher on someone. - The blonde said, leaning against a wall.

- But fighting isn't the solution. Look at all of you. Is this how you want to solve problems? By punching and pinching each other's guts? Some things make us different from animals and ability to not jump on throats is one of this.

- So what, better to hear insults everyday and do nothing? - I said annoyed.

- No, we will do something different. First, Maggie, Anne and Sasha will have a detention today for one hour. You will help cleaning up the classes. Second, Maggie since you can't help yourself and need to provoke Anne, do not bother her again or I will take bigger consequences. And I will be able to know without Anne telling me. Third, I won't tolerate any violence. I also will inform all of your parents, except Marcy.

Maggie huffed annoyed but didn't argue. Sasha didn't seem to care about the reprimand as her eyes full of worry were focused on me. I looked away, wondering what my parents will say. Oh I can already imagine my mom's disappointment. Nothing hard to visual.

Marcy was standing next to Sasha and hugged her. I slightly glance at them and notice something is... different? I can't really tell what but something is just not in the same place. It's like they got even closer than possible.

 

After all of my classes I needed to go to the history classroom where director told us to clean first. My eye was looking slightly better. Through can't say the same about my home situation as already my mon called me and yelled half worried, half mad.

When I walked into the class I saw Sasha and Maggie already under tables scrubbing some old gum. The ginger got up from her knees and threw into my arms a broom.

- You sweep the floors. - She said with irritated voice but without mean comment which was something new.

I held tighter the broom as my vision once again went towards the crawling blonde, she was glancing into my direction. The tension was nowhere gone.

I started to sweep under the tables, my nose was still a bit sore from the earlier accident. Yet it wasn't that bad for me to go to hospital.

Sasha walked up to the trashcan, throwing out the dry, disgusting bubblegum. She looked at me again.

- Anne? - She slowly and calmly said. I didn't react. I was in no mood for that. I mean yeah she helped me with Maggie but why she always puts herself in danger. It's the cost of protecting me. Like I am some baby she needs to watch.

- Annie, I know you are tired. - Sasha tried again and this time she put a hand on my shoulder. - We miss you a lot.

- It's better if I will leave you two alone. - I said dryly. I can't make more trouble to the people I love.

- Don't say that! You matter, Boonchuy. - The Blonde sounded desperate. - To Marcy, to me.

- Can't you see I make only trouble? You are here because of me.

- No. I'm here because I punched that jerk that attacked you.

- I'm not a baby that needs you 24/7. - I said louder, catching Maggie's attention that was watching our discussion like some theater. Sasha's eyes gave me a look of a hurt puppy and I felt guilt build up in my chest.

- I don't say that you need me all of the time but if I will see you get hurt I will try to help.

- Even if you will get hurt?

- Oh please, what Maggie could do to me?

- In Amphibia I fought worse things! - I raised my voice.

- And died! - Sasha yelled out. Regretting it immediately. I looked down on my shoes, my eyes turning glassy. - Listen, we just want you back.

- You and Marcy seem closer without me.

- It's not like that. It's just... - Sasha scratched her neck with slight blush.

- Just what? - I said confused. Sasha seemed nervous and a bit embarrassed which was not like her.

- Me and Marcy date now.

- WHAT?! - I shouted in shock. How did that happen? They just needed a week without me. It hurt more than I thought. I know I cut off but them being so quick to find happiness was like someone stabbed me with a dagger. She and Marcy? Why I felt like my heart got squeezed? - Looks like it's really better when I'm away.

- No! Anne, don't even think that. It doesn't mean it's better that you are away! You-

- Less talking, more cleaning girls. - The director walks in and sits at the desk. Now Sasha couldn't fully explain. The woman watching their work was making it difficult to communicate.

I went back to sweeping the floors. This time I couldn't look at the blonde. Because of the director I was unable to talk more. Besides what even is here to talk? About how useless I am now? Sasha and Marcy just in one week were able to make their life better. I just needed to get out of the picture and there we go. A freshly baked couple, without me! Why? Why am I so mad? Why is my life so complicated? Why? Why I just can't be happy? Why I always need to give up something for others to let them achieve happiness? How do I achieve it?

 

As soon as the bell ran I rushed out of class. Leaving Maggie and Sasha alone, the director also left the class. Sasha had worried look on her face while Maggie chuckles lightly.

- Your princess is quite mad. - The ginger sneered.

- Oh shut the hell up.

- I don't know what happened between you two but you better get your shit together and kiss. - Sasha's eyes widen at the comment.

- How do you...?

- I'm not blind like that idiot. I can tell you are head over heels for her. You would kill for her. I kinda respect that devotion to that nerd and dumbass.

- Thanks... I guess?

 

I walk into my house, closing the door gently. I look into the kitchen and notice my mom cooking. The aroma of the home cooking didn't ease me a bit. I think she didn't hear me walking in because she still didn't yell at me for what happened in school.

I waited patiently for her to go to different room for something. I walked into the kitchen and started to search the shelves. I check one, nothing. Another, just seasoning. Third, finally. All my mom's medication. I grabbed the cup full of her sleeping pills she was taking because she also suffered from insomnia. Yet her pills were more powerful than melatonin. Perfect.

I dashed to the stair yet still being as quiet as possible. Unfortunately it was no use as my mom grabbed my wrist. I quickly sneaked the cup of pills into my bag. I hope she didn't notice it. But she seemed more focused on the injuries on my face.

- Look at you! You look like bus hit you! - My mom said inspecting my eye, I slightly hissed as she touched too rough. - How that all happen? You never acted like some criminal!

- She provoked me mom!

- And you let her get so easy under your skin? Anne, you aren't a little kid anymore.

- But I'm your daughter and you could at least once take my side! - I said gritting my teeth. That's what I needed, an argument with my mom. I started walking up stairs. - I'm going to the bathroom to fresh up.

- Fine but don't think this conversation is over. We need to talk about it. - My mom said firmly but then she added with softer tone. - I'm worried for you, dear.

I turned my head to her direction. I don't want to worry her. After all I know she cares about me a lot and she does it out of concern.

- I'm alright mom. - I said and left to the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind me.

I took out the small bottle and unsure opened it with little "pop" sound. Do I really want to do it? I still can just don't do it. It's not like anyone is expecting that. After all The Guardian gave me more time to take it's place. But am I truly worth it? All I do is just cause everyone some troubles and pain. Being cut out of the picture of their life can be better for them. I will fade away like morning dream from eyelids.

Without much more thinking I started to swallow pills one after another. After I took all of them, I got into the bathtub fully clothed. I laid down thinking about everything I was struggling recently. I took out my phone, looking at the pictures taken in Amphibia. Some with the Plantar family and some with my girls. I even found a few with my parents. I turned on the water in sink as I started to cry.

Without even noticing a hour passed and I started to feel the symptoms of poisoning from pills. My heart was beating faster and I felt nauseous. My vision was getting blurry and head spun. And the stomach pain felt like someone was ripping my guts out. I threw up twice. One into the sink and second before I saw darkness. The last thing I saw before it was my own face with blue glow.

 

Marcy's POV:

- Sasha, you could have waited for me and we would do our plan. - I said while walking with Sasha to Anne's house.

- I know, I know. I should have but can you blame me? I really tried to just see she matters. - Sasha said worried and I sighed.

- I know Sash. But now we can fix it together. - I grabbed the blonde's hand gently into my smaller one. I gave her reassuring smile and squeeze. - Okay?

- Okay. - Sasha nodded and held my hand as we walked.

The walk was calm until I suddenly noticed a blue butterfly sitting on the path. I stopped walking and crouched to inspect it. Something told me to do it. I then noticed the butterfly wasn't resting but laid dead. I felt my gut tighten. Something was wrong. My head slowly moved up and saw a crying ghost of Anne across the street. She faded just after car drove though the street. Clouds got heavier and some droplets of rain fell on my arms and warm cheeks. That's when I realized that on my cheeks wasn't just rain but tears. I was crying?

Sasha looked at me concerned and grabbed my shoulder. She seemed confused of the sudden rain and even more my tears.

- Mar-mar? Everything okay?

- We need to get to Anne as fast as possible. - I wiped my cheeks and grabbed Sasha's hand tighter as I rushed towards Anne's house.

 

I was gasping loudly with the blonde as we were in front of the door. I swallowed and knocked on the door. Just after a while mrs. Boonchuy opened the door and looked at us slightly shocked.

- Hello girls, you look like you ran here.

- We did. - Sasha said still panting.

- Miss, is Anne home?

- Oh yeah, she went to the bathroom to fresh up herself. Though it takes her sometime now. But I'm sure she will soon get out. Please, come in.

- Thank you. - Sasha said and walked in with me but I had a feeling something is not right. I looked at the turn on tv. There was playing a movie about insects. And that's when I noticed a blue butterfly on the screen. My eyes widen and heart beats faster. I quickly go upstairs towards the bathroom.

Sasha looks at me worried and follows me. I frantically knocked on the door. But heard nothing but water running.

- What are you doing? - The blonde asks confused.

- She doesn't answer! - I say panicked. Sasha walks up closer and knocks louder. No answer. She tries to open the door but it's locked.

- Anne? Is everything okay? Anne? Anne! - Sasha says loudly.

- Anne!? Anne! ANNE! - I shout and knock hard. Anne's mom walks to us concerned for Anne not responding, I could see the fear in her eyes.

Sasha without thinking twice starts to pry out the door. After a few times the lock gives in and the door opens. I rush in and gasp as I see my friend in the bathtub unconscious. Fear consumes me all as I take Anne into my arms and try to wake her up.

- Call an ambulance! - Mrs. Boonchuy yelled to Sasha and joined me. Anne wasn't breathing.

 

I barely remember what happened next. The sirens, Anne's mom cries, Sasha's grip on my hand. It all felt like far away compared next to coldness of the hospital hallway and smell of death mixed with detergents.

Sasha was leaning against me taking a nap. I could smell a faint scent of strawberry shampoo on her hair. It gave me some sort of comfort.

Next to me was sitting Anne's mom and her dad. Anne's mom was crying while the dad held her close and rubbed her back. They both looked so worried.

We were now sitting here for maybe an hour. No one knew what was happening with Anne.

Until a doctor appeared in front of mr and mrs Boonchuy. They immediately got up.

- Any information? - Anne's father asked holding his wife's hand.

- Yes sir. Thankfully for the quick reaction your daughter should be fine. She's stable but should stay one more day to check if everything is working good. - The doctor said calmly and we all let go of air we didn't knew we hold.

Anne's parents went first into the room while I gently shook Sasha.

- Hmm? Any news?

- She's okay. - I say with a smile. Sasha looks relived and hugs me tighter.

- Oh frog. That's amazing. I was worried sick.

- She needs to stay one more day just in case.

- But is she away?

- I'm not sure. Her parents went to check on her so we need to wait to know anything more.

- Frog... If I knew she would do something like that... - Sasha looked down on her bouncing leg.

- It's no one's fault. And definitely not yours.

Then Anne's dad walked up to us.

- Hey kids. I know you probably want to see Anne but it's late and nurses won't let you today. But I promise she's alright. You can come tomorrow. Okay?

- We understand sir. The most important she's alive.

 

The next day me and Sasha went to the hospital with a bouquet of flowers. Anne's mom showed us where Anne's room is and let us in and leaving us there alone.

- Okay, so as we prepared, right? - The blonde asks and I nod.

- Yes, just don't throw it at her all.

- Marbles? Sash? - Anne said as she looked at us both from the bed. She had a book in her hands that she put down.

- Annie... - I said and rushed into her arms and hugged her tightly. - Never scare us like that again! Do you know how worried we were? The chance to lose you again was so terrifying!

- If you will do it again I'm going to call you, Boonchuy. - Sasha said and joined the hug. We heard soft sobs coming from Anne.

- I-I'm so so sorry! I just... it was all to much and I had enough and... and... - Anne cried and we simply hugged her tighter.

- Shhh, we know. Just never do that again. We will be here forever for you. Okay? - Sasha said with a gentle smile which Anne returned.

- Oh also these are for you! - I said as me with Sash gave Anne the bouquet of cloves. Anne chuckles.

- Bouquet? Aren't you two now should give each other flowers?

- Oh... you see... - I said with blush. Sasha patted my shoulder.

- The more the merrier eh? - The blonde said with a grin and Anne looked confused.

- We like like you too, Annie. No. We love you. - I say with flushed cheek as Anne was shocked.

- Will you be our girlfriend? - Sasha asked while taking mine and Anne's hand. Anne looked at me and then at Sasha and nodded and hugged us both.

- Of course I will, you dummies.

 

And since then the girl were more happy than ever. Far away, close, happy or sad, struggling or not they had each other. That was all that mattered. As long as there is someone, you will find happiness. And even if you think you are alone, galaxy never has one star.

What about Anne's ghost? Anne accepted her as some part of her. A past that was hers only, something that made her a person she's now.

 

THE END

Notes:

THANK YOU ALL FOR FINISH MY WORK. UGHHH also for all the nice comments over the months and the support. Don't worry tho bc I still got a lot of plans for next fanfictions. Next one in line is sashanne one so be ready and steady. Also I got some personal project in mind that will be a fantasy so get ready if you like cats, slavic culture and gays ofc. Thank you again and I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoy writing for yall.

Notes:

I have no idea how often I will add chapters... But I will try write often!