Chapter Text
I didn't remember being so cold here before our departure, Grace, how long has it been? Three, no, four years already.
I sighed, it wasn't even that long, and it felt so... Different, everyone says that night time is always beautiful at the Altus Plateau, and from here I could attest to that, sitting a few meters away from our camp, which is set on top of one of the hills, northwest of the Capital, a nice place, the golden grass was a nice contrast to the night sky.
I looked at the sky for a while, admiring how beautiful that particular shade of blue was, and how it always managed to soothe me, no matter how bored, anxious, or straight up sad I was.
Thinking about that made me shed a single tear, surprising myself a little.
"And they think Miquella is the sentimental one..." I murmured to myself while wiping that single drop of liquid from my face, the thing I once thought my body would never be able to produce again, and still, there it was, at the tip of my finger, that made me chuckle a little in disbelief.
"Getting all nostalgic already?"
'Speaking of the devil' I thought as Miquella approached me, and sat by my side, while I was switching between gazing upon our old home, the Capital, daydreaming about the weather, and contemplating my little miracle, the one he was responsible for.
"Truth be told, I was expecting your stoic warrior facade to break when father pulled you into a sparring match after we get home, or, if you were really committed to the act, when Ranni inevitably gets on your nerves for whatever reason you come up with this time" He commented.
I sighed "Good evening to you too, Miquella" I replied, half amused about his comment on Father's trademark 'welcome home' tradition, and slightly annoyed about the mention of that little bookworm he was always so fond of.
I turned to face him "And it's a nice view, I'm grateful that I can see it, that's all..." I was being honest, it was, indeed, a nice view, from our campsite we could see the whole Capital, well, the huge walls surrounding it, at least, just as imposing as the first time I saw it so many years ago.
He took a few seconds to appreciate the view by my side, probably wondering what was so 'nice' about it, before finally speaking.
"Well, it's bright, that's for sure. Must be a great inspiration for your paintings, but I was never too inclined to see the world in the 'artistic' way, so I can't really say I enjoy it as much as you do. I would personally prefer to spend my sight on a good tome, or anything other than staring at literal grass, but to each their own, I guess" He said and I wondered how can someone so enlightened be so willingly ignorant?
He kept going "... To me, it honestly just looks like a lot of hills, and then a big city surrounding a big castle, with a big old tree on the middle" he said, dismissively.
I chuckled at his annoyingly accurate little comment "Ladies and gentlemen, behold! The Unalloyed! Pure as gold, and DENSE as the scales of the ancient dragons!" I said, mockingly reverencing him while he laughed a bit.
We stood there in silence for a while before I opened my mouth again.
"Thank yo-" I began, but he stopped me.
"Please don't, we've been through this, you don't have to thank me anymore, the first thousand times were enough, believe me" He said, smiling warmly at the end.
"I know, it's just..." I braced my knees, partially to block the cold air, but mostly to have something to do with my hands.
"You saved me. Well, what was left of me at least" I said, and my voice started to shake "... I-I could never thank you enough, Miquella, this" I pointed to my eyes "Was everything I thought I had left, an then I lost it... I never thought I would see this place again, or Mother's face, o-or the sky... or y-you, or..."
"Malenia, please..." He put one hand on my shoulder, Grace, I always forget how tiny his hands are, and surprisingly warm, considering the weather.
"You're my sister" He said in a stern tone "I would've burned this whole world if you asked me to, and you know it"
I chuckled, while wiping another tear from the corner of my eye "Does Mother know you're saying things like that?"
"What, you're gonna tell her? Humph, can't believe that's what I get for curing you. But honestly I should've seen that coming, you barbarians are all the same" He said, faking disappointment.
"Haha, very funny! Who do you think I am? Rykard? I'm not a snitch, and you know it" I shot back.
"Well, true, but that's a really low barr you've got there" He said, and we laughed for a bit.
After a while he broke the silence again "Grace, and here I was thinking curing you would be the most unbelievable event on the family, but no, good old Rykard had to surprise everyone announcing a marriage with that... What's her name again?" He asked me.
I took a moment to think "Tanin? Or Taniff... Something like that, I couldn't care less. All I know is that she is the lady of Mount Gelmir now, since her father left the Lands Between to become a Tarnished a few years ago"
"I see, so he was one of them... Well, she seems nice, at least, helping us on our journey back and all. Even considering her questionable choice of consort, she went out of her way to help, so I guess that's more than we could've hoped for"
He paused for a moment to look at... Whatever got his attention this time, and then looked back at me.
"Oh, and remind me to thank her for the that, the path connecting the Haligtree to the Plateau really came in handy. I would've really hated to force our entourage through another journey across those god forsaken lands covered in snow"
"Tell me about it. Wait, 'remind me'?" I said, raising an eyebrow at him "20 years and you're still asking me to remind you to do things? Goldy Locks, if you can't remember, what are the odds that I, of all people, would?"
"Don't call me 'Goldy Locks'!" He protested.
I shrugged "Not gonna happen. Godwyn is the 'Golden boy' and you are our little 'Goldy locks', is as simple as that" I said, matter of factually.
"Oh, so you wanna go there again, huh?" He asked, using that childish tone, the one his curse made sure he would probably never lose, and I knew where this was going already.
"Don't you dare" I threatened.
"What? I was jus-"
"Don't!"
"Grace, okay, I won't say it... Mally!" He spit the horrible 'nickname' that witch calls me since we were kids. Grace, I hated every single time I had to hear it.
"Come back here!" I shouted, as he ran away right after insulting me in the only way he knew it would get on my nerves.
I honestly don't know how that short ass bookworm could be so damn irritating, but it's been like this for years now, she would find a new way to piss me off, and then Miquella would follow suit just for the sake of it. Our parents would just let things be that way because we're supposed to 'get along'.
Now that I stopped to think about it, I kinda missed that a little, our incessant banter, I wouldn't admit to him, but yes, this was really nostalgic after all.
~~~
"Hey! Slow down, we'd appreciate it if you'd get us there in one piece, if that's not a problem for you!" I shouted at the coachman from inside our carriage.
I knew the Lands Between were not the most levelled expenses of land on the globe, but every single time we had to travel to Leyndell, and there were a lot of times, this bloody terrain would make sure to remind us of our latest meals by shoving them back all the way back up with this incessant trembling.
On top of that, these stupid Cuckoo Knights couldn't try harder to test the limits of my patience, rushing through these lands like we were running away from the outer god of Rot itself.
"Rosebud, what have I told you about mistreating our subordinates?" Mother asked me without looking away from the book she was reading.
Stars, I could never understand how she was always so peaceful during our imprisonments in this rattlesnake tail we call a carriage.
I sighed "I know, sorry Mother, it's just-"
"What is the first virtue of every sorcerer, Ranni?" She asked before I could finish my sentence, and here we go again...
She shifted her gaze from the book to look me right in the eyes, she really treated me like an infant sometimes.
"Respect" I finally answered.
She smiled "Correct, so you'll pay your respects apologizing to our coachman after we arrive" She stated, using that teacher like tone she is so used to.
"But M-"
"No 'buts' Ranni. You have to learn how to express yourself without disrespecting the others, there's no merit in being better than your equals, th-"
"The merit resides in being better than yourself. I know" I finished the saying I was so tired of hearing from Mother, and from every teacher at school as well.
Mother seemed a little taken aback by my interruption, but she ignored it and moved along, giving me a soft smile instead
"See? You've got a hold of the theory already, now it'll just take a little bit of practice" She stated with a grin.
I looked to the side after a letting out heavy sigh.
Graduated for four whole years and I still get pep talks from Mother on a regular basis.
I looked back at her as she gave me a little chuckle before asking "Tired already? Relax, I think there's only 3 hours or so left"
"Great!" I exclaimed sarcastically.
Mother opened her mouth to speak, but I was ahead of her "I know, the second virtue of every sorcerer is patience, and you know I can be patient, but it's not easy to keep my balance while these troglodytes are trying to brake every single bone in my body!" I explained.
"Still not fond of warriors, I see" Mother said with a smirk "I guess somethings never change"
I reclined slightly on my seat "Nothing personal, I just can't really grasp the concept of seeing a hurricane and trying to face it head on as my first reaction, that's all" I said, nonchalantly.
"And how would you, my little princess, handle said hurricane?" She asked, half amused.
"Seek shelter, like a sane person would" I said, dismissively, as I looked at the road through my window.
"Oh, I see, but what if you were suddenly caught in such a hypothetical situation? And there was no shelter nearby?" Mother questioned.
"Hardly a possibility, Mother, I would probably have a shelter set already. Hurricanes are dangerous, sure, but the weather, such as the stars, is pretty predictable itself" I said, looking briefly at her, and then back at the window, still bored and annoyed by this whole trip.
Mother sighed "You can't predict everything, Ranni. I know you better than anyone, and I've seen just how bright you truly are..." She said, pausing to give me time to look back at her before she could finish "But more often than not, you'll have to adapt, learn to deal with the unpredictable, and sometimes, you won't even have the time to do that" Stars, feels like I never left school.
"I know I can't predict everything, Mother, I'm not that dull. but that's the point, these variables, the chaos of this world, that's why I have to hold everything that I can control on a short leash" A lesson I learned a few years ago with Master Lusat, but I wouldn't say that to her, Mother never liked him, though she'd never admit it.
"A wise way to view the world, that's for sure..." A classical condescending note to her words, but I didn't mind, she knows I'm right "But even the wisest individual still has its weaknesses, such as you have yours" She said, teasingly.
"Well- wait, what weaknesses?" I genuinely couldn't think of a single thing about me that could be considered a 'weakness' in the way she implied.
"Oh, I don't know, maybe the only 'troglodyte' as you would call her, that used to constantly drag you out of this cold, methodical shell of yours? Said troglodyte would be the very reason for this whole trip" She finished, still keeping that teasing note on her voice.
"Mally is not a- she didn't- what do you mean 'drag me'?" I couldn't have contradicted myself more if I had tried.
Okay, maybe there was a hint of truth to my Mother's words, though I would never say it out loud. Mally was always taunting me one way or the other, sure, it was fun to provoke her as well, and I should know, I was the one who started most of our... 'Discussions' for the lack of a better word, but Stars, she always had a way to even the odds.
Mother just stood there, looking at my face while I tried to think of a better response than my deafening silence to give her.
After I couldn't formulate a single word, she spoke again "Easy, Rosebud, I can see the red on your cheeks, that's not healthy for you" she said, chuckling right after.
A few seconds later, which felt like way more than that, I was able to finally say something, although in a hushed tone.
"She's a brute, and she's impulsive... And sometimes she's just like a wild animal. Stars, I can't believe she's Miquella's sister sometimes" I said, while looking away from Mother.
"She's one of your 'variables', isn't she? One of the forces of chaos you're so concerned about" Mother said, this time in a different tone, less teacher and more... Mother.
"She's always been" I took a deep breath, while looking back at the golden grass passing by "It's been so long... I wonder how she is"
I couldn't remember when it happened, but somehow I fell asleep, lost on my thoughts about seeing her after so long.
~~~
'They should be here anytime soon, is there anything I forgot?' I thought while playing with a puzzle cube Radagon gave me on our first anniversary.
Even if I have solved it about a million times already, it was a nice fidget device I've always liked to keep around.
I finished it quicker than I expected, and after a quick sigh I just put the puzzle back at the table beside my chair, still no more relived than I was before completing that puzzle.
I kept repeating to myself that I shouldn't be this tense, but no matter how hard I tried to look at the bright side of things, and it was a very bright side. After all, my only daughter was finally cured from that monstrosity I cursed her with.
I know that she would never blame me for what happened to her, but still I just couldn't get rid of this feeling, this... Dread.
"Mind if I join you at your... whatever it is you're doing, my Love?" Radagon asked jokingly, as he put his hand on my shoulder.
That caught me by surprise. I turned my head to meet his gaze, that ever present fire burning behind his concerned look.
"I guess I don't... Even though I'm not really sure of what 'this' actually is as well" I said, closing my eyes to take a breath before continuing "Are they here already?" A mixture of hope and fear in my voice.
He nodded "So that's what this is about. Yes they're at the main gates, shouldn't take longer than half an hour to get to the palace... What is it that disturbs you so much, my Love? We should be celebrating their return" He asked, as he got closer to gently cup my cheeks, taking a good look at my face.
"This is not about them, is it?" He promptly said, after analyzing my expression. Grace, this man can read me like a book.
"... I'm happy, more than words could ever express... But you know that's all my fault, Radagon, this is all my fault, after Morgott and Mohg... I just, I couldn't take any other risks. They were my children, my miracles, and this world would never see them like that... I promised myself that I would never curse another living soul with a similar fate..." I took a long, deep breath, knowing Radagon wouldn't interrupt my train of thought.
"And then you came into my life, after Godfrey's departure to die beyond the fog... I was lonely, I was weak, and in my weakness I believed that I deserved a life by your side, a family even, a father for my children. You accepted them so easily, you accepted me so easily, with all my flaws and complaints, and never asked anything in return..." I took another moment to breathe.Grace, it was getting harder to hold back my tears.
"And you gave me the greatest gift I could ever ask for, you gave me a new life. At the moment I saw our kids I knew, so perfect, both of them, I couldn't believe it" My tone got somber "But life couldn't be so perfect..."
"Marika..."
"They were tainted, Radagon! Tainted by my influence. Cursed by my enemies" I exclaimed, then shifted to a hiss "Cowards, all of them! Incapable of facing me themselves, attacking my children instead"
I swallowed a sob, and after a few seconds I got back to my melancholic tone "The happiest moment of my life... ruined forever"
He never took his eyes out of me while I was speaking, holding my hands before finally opening his mouth.
"Never, ever again, insinuate that you don't deserve happiness, okay? You're my Sun, my shield, and most important, you're the greatest mother of all ages, and you can ask our kids, all of them will tell you the same" He stated, wiping a single tear running down my cheek.
I would live a thousand years without understanding just how could this one individual make me smile just by simply existing in front of me, perhaps somethings were never meant to be understood, anyway, he continued.
"I never regretted marrying you, not even for a second. It took all my strength to leave Rennala, and even knowing it was the right thing to do, I still never felt so low in my whole life. And then you came back into my life, my old friend, the one who faced the gods themselves by my side, a soul just as broken as mine was, and from the moment I swore to never leave your side, I knew that whatever it was to come from this, good or bad, I wanted, and still want it all" He finally stated.
I couldn't hold my tears anymore, as I pulled him in a tight hug that I never wanted to be over.
"I'm so afraid, my Love. All of this, this peace, this beautiful things in our lives, they're so, so fragile... If something happens-" I whispered.
"Then we'll handle it, together. I promise you" He whispered back, and we stood there for Grace knows how long, and no matter how long it was, it went by in the blink of an eye.
I knew something was coming, something dangerous, and I could only pray to the Greater Will that our family would be ready for it, and as I did, we heard a knock on our door, the sound we've spent four years expecting.
The messenger entered the room with the announcement.
"Princess Malenia the severed and Prince Miquella the Unalloyed!"