Chapter Text
“You’re gonna choke if you keep eating that fast.”
Keith paused with his burger halfway to his mouth to glare at Pico. “What’re you, my fucking mother?”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Pico quipped back, cocky grin plastered on his face.
Keith just rolled his eyes and continued eating. It had been a long time since he was able to chow down on good food, he was gonna take his damn time enjoying it. Plus… it was a wonderful distraction from the storm raging outside. It had been almost an hour, and it showed no signs of slowing down.
Keith pointed to Pico’s uneaten burger with his pinky. “You gonna eat anything?”
Pico shrugged. “Not super hungry right now. I’ll probably take it home.”
Keith gave him a frown, one Pico pointedly ignored. He didn’t have time to ponder on Pico’s health, however, as another boom of thunder shook the windows behind him. He shivered, trying to will the panic away. Keith sighed to himself silently; it looked like it was gonna be another awful night. He really wished he could just get over this stupid fear, what adult is afraid of thunder ?
Well, a traumatized one , he thought to himself.
He looked up to ask Pico how long he thought the storm might last, but the man was zoned out, his eyes glazed over as he stared out of the window.
“What’re you thinking about?” Keith curiously asked, but Pico only gave him a small hum, seemingly not hearing him at all.
“Pico, you good?”
No response.
Keith cocked his head in confusion. He’d never seen the usually vigilant and focused guy look so…out of it. Then, he noticed something worrying. Even though his face was slack and emotionless, Pico’s knuckles were gripping his arms with enough force to turn them white. He also was taking very short, shallow breaths. Minus the expression, his body language read…afraid? Was Pico scared of storms too?
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Nothing. “Pico?” Nothing.
Keith looked behind him to peek out of the window, seeing if he could find anything that might’ve startled Pico. He saw nothing but cars drive by and pedestrians running for shelter from the downpour. Definitely nothing of note…
He turned back and reached out his hand, using a last ditch effort to get Pico’s attention. His fingertips barely grazed the fabric of Pico's sweater when the ginger jolted, that faraway look in his eyes fading as he flinched away from the contact and inhaled sharply. Keith retracted his hand and watched as Pico took quiet, ragged breaths and looked directly at the table in front of him.
He waited patiently for Pico to get his breathing under control before speaking up. “Hey, back to Earth?”
Pico glanced at him, giving him just a simple nod before scooting out of the booth and heading in the direction of the restaurant’s bathroom. Keith watched him walk away before relaxing in his seat, sighing. He wasn’t sure if Pico’s little dissociation moment was drug-related or something else (he had heard stories and rumors in high school that Pico wasn’t exactly mentally stable), but he couldn’t help but feel sympathetic for the guy. Whatever the issue was, it didn’t matter, Keith just wanted to help his friend.
He hoped that Pico would feel comfortable enough to talk about it someday, but Keith was smart enough to realize that day wouldn’t be today.
When Pico returned after around ten minutes, he was back to his normal self, like nothing had ever happened. Keith raised an eyebrow at him, but Pico ignored it.
“Ready to go?” he asked, his voice noticeably raspier and more strained than before.
Keith looked behind him again to the window just as a flash of lightning lit up the restaurant. He stiffened; he had been so focused on Pico he had forgotten that it was storming.
“Yeah, uh…” He took a deep breath as he turned back to look at Pico. “Just curious, how long do you think the storm’s gonna last?”
“Dunno. Probably all night,” Pico replied with a shrug.
“Great,” Keith drew out sarcastically, failing to hide the returning panic.
“...You gonna be alright out there?”
Keith was taken aback by Pico’s sympathetic tone, one he hadn’t heard before. It kind of shocked him, in all honesty. “I’ll…manage.”
Pico just stared at him for a few seconds, shifting his weight between foots as he hesitated. Finally, he sighed. “Do you wanna just stay at my place tonight?”
“What?!”
Keith hadn’t meant to say that so loudly, but never in a million years did he think Pico would offer that. He knew the man liked his privacy and personal space…what was up with him today?
Of course, he really didn’t want to turn down an offer like that. The idea of spending the night trapped in a metal box in the middle of a thunderstorm scared him shitless.
“Are you sure it’s okay?” he cautiously asked.
Pico shrugged and grabbed his burger, wrapping it up before turning to leave. “It’ll get you out of the rain tonight,” he started before shooting a look over to Keith, “ if you promise to not to bring up what happened a bit ago.”
Mentally, Keith rolled his eyes. This guy really worked on the ‘favour for a favour’ ideal, huh?
“Deal.”
~~~~~
The bus ride back was…uncomfortable, to say the least. Out of all the times to have an episode, why did it have to be then ? Pico couldn’t believe the timing of his brain. Luckily for him, though, Keith seemed to be keeping his word about not bringing it up, instead ranting about the shitty interactions he had while performing all day. Pico wasn’t really paying attention, but he accepted the distraction gratefully. He couldn’t wait to be home.
…Right. Pico groaned quietly to himself, remembering yet another thing to ruin his night. All he wanted was to be able to be able to get home and get high out of his mind and pretend he wasn’t fucked in the head. Instead of that, he now had to play the role of accommodating host. Why the fuck did he offer to let Keith stay the night? He hated his sense of loyalty, it was really starting to become a problem. Another thing to hate the gang for, he guessed.
He was torn out of his thoughts by an elbow nudging his side. “Hey Pico…” Keith started and sat forward in his seat to look at him in the face.
Pico simply side-eyed him, already knowing what he was gonna ask.
“I know we made a deal, but -”
Pico growled quietly.
“I know, I know. Relax, I’m not asking specifics, I just wanna know…drug-related?”
Pico chewed on the inside of his cheek. Keith gave him a perfect out, he could just lie. It’d be so easy and Keith would believe anything he said. And yet…
“No,” he said with a sigh.
Keith simply nodded and sat back in his seat. A few more uncomfortable minutes passed before he spoke up again.
“Actually, do you wanna know why I hate thunder so much?”
“I don’t care, do whatever you want.” He meant that, but deep down, Pico couldn’t deny that he was a little bit curious.
Keith took that as a go-ahead. “Let me start by saying that my parents aren’t great people. When I was little, instead of the usual punishments you get when you fucked up as a kid like the time-out corner or a spanking or whatever, my mother got a little more…creative.”
He paused for a moment, giving Pico an opportunity to glance at him. He was fiddling with his fingers in an anxious manner, giving Pico that cursed pang in his stomach again. He felt as though this was a conversation he wasn’t meant to hear.
“She would lock me up in the garage. Most of the time it wasn’t that bad, it was a heated garage so winters didn’t suck too much. I usually just got really, really bored. During spring, when it would storm a lot, it…wasn’t that great. Do you know how loud thunder is in a metal room?”
“Pretty loud…” Pico mused, frowning.
“No shit,” Keith chuckled. “A few years of that, now I’m a grown ass adult who’s scared of thunder. Pretty pathetic, right?”
Pico felt terrible for making fun of him earlier, another thing to add to the self-loathing checklist. A pang of guilt wrecked his stomach, making him feel sick.
“It’s not, it’s out of your control.”
Keith shrugged and sighed. “You’d think living in a metal box for a couple years would mean I’d get used to it, but I never did. Don’t think I ever will, honestly.”
“I’m sorry,” Pico said, and for once, he meant it. “That’s fucked.”
“It’s whatever. Point is,” Keith said, taking a deep breath before looking over to Pico, “I’ve got my own mental hangups. I would never judge you for your freakouts, you don’t have to worry about it.”
Pico didn’t know how to respond to that, how to feel about that, so he resorted to just turning away to stare out of the bus window as it approached their stop. He bit the inside of his already bleeding cheek again, trying to ignore the swirling thoughts in his mind.
~~~~~
“Well, this is it.”
Keith took a lingering look around Pico’s apartment. It was…much better than he expected, in all honesty. Not very dirty, no trash lingering around, an AC unit in the window, a TV, the works. It was kind of bare in the furniture department, but Pico didn’t really seem like the type to have a lot of furniture anyway.
“It’s nice!”
Pico rolled his eyes. “You don’t have to lie, dude, I live in the projects.”
“I know, I was expecting it to be way worse!”
“...I’ll take that as a compliment. Follow me, I’ll show you around.”
Pico led him through the apartment, showing Keith the couch he would be sleeping on, the kitchen and where the glasses were in case he got thirsty, the bathroom, etc. After the tour, he settled on the couch while Pico grabbed a spare blanket from his bedroom.
“Here, it’s not as scratchy as it looks,” he said as he handed the (very scratchy looking) blanket to Keith.
He took it gratefully, unfolding it as the exhaustion of the day finally hit him. Singing all day in the humid spring air and having a panic attack would’ve been enough, but the fact that for the first time in years he was sleeping on something much more comfortable than a metal floor had him on the brink of a coma.
“Well, if it’s an emergency, I’ll be in my room. Night,” Pico said as he turned to walk away.
A very sudden wave of generosity hit Keith square in the chest. Pico didn’t have to do this, he knew that. For as much as the man had an aura of aggression surrounding him, he could be nice if he tried, something Keith didn’t want to take for granted.
“Wait, Pico,” Keith started, waiting for Pico to turn to look at him. “Thank you. For everything, I mean.”
Pico didn’t respond with anything more than a simple nod and went into his room, leaving Keith to pass out the second he closed his eyes.
~~~~~
Pico exhaled a chestful of smoke just as a flash of lightning lit up his room. He had tried and failed to sleep for several hours now, not an uncommon occurrence, but this time was…different. It wasn’t the usual nightmares or hallucinations that kept him up, but Keith . As much as Pico had tried, he just couldn’t shake the street rat. What was worse, he found that he actually liked being around him. Sure, Keith annoyed him to no end sometimes, but it had been a very long time since someone has tried to understand and care about him. Pico was resistant to it most of the time, but the gesture was still enough to give him pause.
Thunder boomed outside, shaking the glass doors leading to his balcony a bit. Pico sighed and sat up, ashing the cigarette before coming to a conclusion that would’ve never crossed his mind even a couple weeks ago.
He considered Keith a friend. His first in a long time.