Chapter Text
“I just don’t think sex is my thing. It doesn’t feel that good for me.”
Hanbin and his friend, Hao, had just been talking casually until somehow, they ended up talking about their sex lives. An undeniably awkward topic to land on, but neither of them tried to change the subject anyway.
The other hums thoughtfully. “That’s understandable. You’ve also tried bottoming?”
“Uh?” Hanbin blinks — he’d never considered it before, so it comes as a surprise. Plus, he’s straight. He supposes he could’ve asked a girl to peg him, but it never came to him, and none of the girls he’s dated or hooked up with seemed to be into that. “No, I guess I haven’t.”
“Have you thought about trying it?” Hao asks, before he seems to realize something and his eyes widen a little. “Shit, sorry if I’m overstepping. You don’t have to answer that.”
Hanbin rushes to answer, shaking his head. “No no no, it’s okay. I don’t mind.”
Honestly, he’s always admired Hao. He always looks so confident, so comfortable as himself. Hao is gay, he’s practically made sure everyone knows that, and he doesn’t have a smidge of shame in it. He’s had plenty of dating experience, unlike Hanbin, whose few relationships had often ended with the girl storming out, saying something about how Hanbin doesn’t love her and that he doesn’t show any interest in her. His last had even told him to figure his shit out. But that’s besides the point. Hanbin finds himself looking up to Hao, wanting to be more like him.
And while Hanbin considers himself to be straight as a ruler, and that he finds no attraction in men whatsoever no matter how handsome and pretty and caring Zhang Hao may be — surely, it wouldn’t hurt to experiment just a little.
He looks up and Hao is staring expectantly. His heart flutters just a tad bit under his gaze.
Choosing to train his eyes on the laces of his shoes instead, he murmurs, “Sure. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to try.”
“Okay.” He looks up to see Hao smiling warmly, leaning in and placing a comforting hand on Hanbin’s knee. “I can help.”
They talk for the next half hour. Hanbin gets home with a pounding heart and a bright pink face. He’s had sex before, but never with a man — yet he really can’t deny his curiosity about it. Once, he’d locked himself in his room and, curiously, tried it himself. Hanbin chickened out as soon as the pad of the finger entered and he ended up settling for just his trusty right hand and a tissue. He really hopes it doesn’t end up like that again.
They’d decided on meeting at Hanbin’s place. Hanbin cleans himself as Hao instructed, throws on some clothes (just for Hao to take off), and waits in anticipation with a pounding heart.
Seconds suddenly feel like hours as he listens for a knock on the door or a ringing of a doorbell. He crosses his legs, uncrosses them. He lays down, sits back up. He paces the room and fidgets with his fingers until finally — he hears a knock.
Not a moment passes before he’s opening the door, not even bothering to check through the peephole first, and his breath is stolen from his lungs at the sight of Zhang Hao, clad in just a gray hoodie and shorts, messy blond hair falling into his big, brown eyes. He’s so busy gawking that he almost doesn’t register Hao waving his hand in front of his face.
“Oh. Hi.”
“Hey.” Hao grins. “Am I late?”
“No, no. You’re good. Come in.” Hanbin opens the door, closing it shut behind him as Hao enters and leaves his shoes by the doormat.
Hanbin leads him to his bedroom, patting the spot on his bed next to him to gesture for Hao to sit down.
He gulps, trying to hide his restlessness. “So… How do we do this?”
“Just relax. I’ll take the lead.” His smile sends Hanbin’s heart leaping (in the straightest way possible) as Hao leads him to lay down on the bed.
Hanbin lets out a humiliating squeak, snapping his legs together when Hao immediately pulls his pants and boxers down in one swift movement.
“Cute,” He chuckles, under his breath as if talking to himself.
Shyly, Hanbin parts his legs for Hao, turning his head away in embarrassment. He probably shouldn’t have, because the next thing he knows there’s a finger right at his asshole and he flinches away, startled.
“Waitwaitwait,” He gasps, already internally crying, “Sorry, I just — Shouldn’t we get fully undressed first?”
Hao pauses, like he’s carefully contemplating Hanbin’s poor attempt at dragging this out. “If that’ll make you more comfortable, alright.”
Hanbin blinks and, oh, Hao’s shirt is off and his thumbs are hooked into the hem of his pants. His hands fly to partially cover his eyes. “Wait! Hang on.” Hao blinks in confusion, stopping his movements. “I change my mind, just — don’t take it all off yet.”
“Okay.” He nods, hands moving away from his pants and Hanbin sighs quietly in relief. “Lube?”
“Second cabinet down. Condoms there too.”
Some rummaging. “Got them. Open your legs for me?”
Hanbin spreads his legs and it hits him again that he’s about to have sex with his relatively new, awfully good-looking, male friend. Oh god. He can’t believe this isn’t a wet dream.
“Holy shit.”
“Something wrong?” Hanbin’s brows furrow.
“No, just… You have a… nice…” Hanbin tilts his head curiously. “Nothing. Hold this leg up for me — there you go.” Hao murmurs, warming up the lube between his fingers.
Hanbin wraps his arms around his thigh to hold it up, bracing himself as he watches the blond pull apart his cheeks with his clean hand, the lubed one moving to his ass. His breath hitches when he feels one finger, cold against his hot skin despite being warmed up, gently tracing along his rim.
“Breathe,” Hao soothes, voice hushed and calm. Hanbin takes shaky breaths, gasping when the callused tip of his finger slips in.
Hanbin screws his eyes shut. The intrusion is unfamiliar, wet, and weird. He continues taking deep breaths, trying to loosen up for Hao as he slowly enters his finger.
“Have you ever touched yourself here before?” Hao asks, finger stilling where it’s halfway in his hole.
“Uhm,” He blinks, trying to recollect his thoughts. “Once. I tried, but it was weird, so I couldn’t go all the way.”
“I see.”
“Ah,” Hanbin squirms, Hao’s middle finger now buried knuckle-deep inside him. “Hyung, I don’t- I don’t think this’ll work.”
“Give it a second,” Hao moves his finger around, seemingly searching for something. “It should be here somewhere…”
Then the pad of his finger presses against something inside him, ever so gently. An electrifying feeling shoots up his spine and his whole body jolts, a broken oh escaping him.
“Found it.”
Hanbin throws his head back when Hao starts massaging that area, tears accumulating in the corners of his eyes. Pleasure floods his senses, legs trembling and jaw dropping open, short gasps and whimpers escaping him.
“Uh, wait, I’m…!”
The feeling disappears as soon as it comes, and he can’t help the distraught whine leaving his lips. Hao has the audacity to giggle at his suffering as he pulls his finger out.
“You can’t come now, Bin-ah. I haven’t even finished prepping you yet.” He smiles innocently, contradictory to his menacing words.
Hanbin groans into his hands. “Well hurry up then,” He pouts, using his legs to pull the older man’s arm back.
Hao raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t pull away. “Bossy.”
This time when Hao plunges his finger in, he avoids that spot, instead focusing on getting him stretched out. Hao seems all too familiar with the movements — Hanbin the slightest pang in his heart.
“Do you do this often?” He asks before he can stop himself, just as Hao adds a second. “Sorry. You don’t have to answer.”
The blond continues gently scissoring his fingers into Hanbin, humming as he thinks of how to answer, a little too casually. “I’ve done this quite a few times. It feels great and all, but none of them were all that special, y’know?” He whispers something else under his breath that Hanbin doesn’t quite catch.
Hanbin tilts his head to the side, trying to find some way to muffle the small noises that escape him. He buries half of his face into the pillow, pressing his lips tightly together.
What about me? He wants to ask. Am I special to you?
Hao’s finger brushes against that spot again and Hanbin grits out, hand fisted into the sheets, “That’s enough, right?”
But when Hao pauses, he chuckles instead of pulling out as Hanbin expected. He shakes his head, continuing his movements with a fond smile. “Not nearly enough, unless you’re that into pain.”
The younger flushes red, whining softly in his throat and looking away again. He has to bite his lip to keep from making an embarrassing noise as Hao slips a third finger in. “H-How much longer?”
“We should do four, just in case.” He kisses Hanbin on the leg. “You never know.”
Hanbin doesn’t answer, too busy short-circuiting. Did Hao just kiss him? No — why does Hanbin like it so much? Is he—
He’s snapped out of it when Hao’s fourth finger enters and he spreads them out, the stretch arguably painful. He digs his fingers into where he’s holding up his quivering leg, “It- It hurts.”
“Sorry.” Hao stops moving, then he takes Hanbin’s cock in his hand and into his mouth.
What the fuck.
“Hao!” He squirms, “What the- You can’t just-”
He sucks gently on the tip as he stretches Hanbin’s hole, swirling his tongue around the head. The sensation distracts him from the stretch, legs jerking at the sudden stimulation.
He pulls off, letting Hanbin breathe for once, and hums. “Don’t come too fast.”
Instead of taking his cock back into his mouth like he expects, Hao dips his head further down to lap at his rim. Hanbin kicks at the air in surprise.
“D-Don’t—”
“Didn’t you wonder why I told you to clean here?”
Hanbin covers his mouth to muffle the moan that leaves him as Hao’s tongue slips in next to his fingers. It licks along his walls and curls in, leaving him shaking and gasping against the pillow.
He’s on the verge of coming again when Hao stops altogether, tongue and fingers leaving his hole.
“Mean.” Hanbin pouts. Hao laughs fondly.
“You were so impatient. Now I can fuck you like you’ve been begging me to.”
Hanbin flushes bright pink — he didn’t mean for it to sound like that, but he supposes he’s not entirely against the idea.
Hao’s thumbs hook into his shorts and pull them down with his boxers in one swift move, and oh shit.
“Uhm.”
“Yes?”
“Dude.” Hanbin considers kicking him out and just jerking off in the shower instead. Maybe that would be easier than trying to take that fucking monster of a dick. “That’s not gonna fit.”
Hao stares incredulously. “Did you just call me ‘dude’ when we’re literally about to have gay sex?”
“Well- When you put it like that…”
“Trust me, it’ll fit.” Hao strips off his hoodie, revealing nothing underneath. He gestures for Hanbin to remove his shirt, to which he does. And Hanbin swears he can hear something along the lines of, I’ll make it fit, but it’s muffled over the rustling of fabric.
“Yeah right.” He scoffs, choosing not to ask about it and throwing his shirt to the side.
“We can still just blow each other if you want. Hands work too if that’s not your thing,” Hao shrugs, as if it’s not that big of a deal.
“I just…” Hanbin furrows his eyebrows, eyes shamelessly trained on Hao’s lower region. He didn’t take up Hao’s precious time today for nothing. “It’s fine. Let’s do it. But- be gentle, okay?”
The look in Hao’s brown eyes is soft and warm. “Of course.”
They shift around a little so Hanbin is on his hands and knees, hips lifted in the air. He screws his eyes shut, listening to Hao slick his length up and roll the condom on before lining up to his ass.
“Let me know if you want me to stop.”
Hao pushes in, barely past the head of his cock before he stops, the grip on his hips tightening. Hanbin gasps and clutches the pillow, squirming under his hold.
“Hanbin,” Hao grunts out, “You need to relax a little…”
The younger lets out a soft whine, trying to calm his breaths. Eventually, he loosens up enough for Hao to continue sinking his hard cock in. Hanbin freezes, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion and panic as he stops, seeming to have bottomed out, but his cock doesn’t seem to stop getting bigger.
“I’m halfway in. Are you okay?”
What.
“Halfway?” Hanbin splutters. “But then- Why-”
“I’m barely even fully hard yet,” Hao giggles, patting his asscheek. “You’re so funny.”
No, this is not funny, Hanbin thinks, bracing himself as Hao starts to push in again.
Every time Hanbin thinks he’s finished, Hao just pauses for a second before sinking deeper in, until finally, he actually bottoms out, hips pressed flush against Hanbin’s ass. Experimentally, he clenches around the thickness, listening to the moan that leaves Hao’s lips. In all honesty, Hanbin doubts he actually even feels that good around him, it must be his size alone making it seem that way.
“Tell me when you’re ready.”
After what feels like a few minutes, the slight pain of the stretch gradually fades away, until the subtle pleasure of being filled seeps through. Hanbin bites down on his lip, raising his hips a bit higher.
“You can move now.”
Hao steadies his hips, hands on both sides. It feels like forever until he finally pulls out all the way to the tip, before fucking back in in one swift thrust.
Hanbin’s mouth falls open, fingers digging into the sheets. Instead of pulling back to thrust in again, Hao rolls his hips against him, grinding the head of his cock just shy of Hanbin’s prostate.
A pathetic whine leaves his mouth, and he wiggles his hips, trying to get him closer to that spot. But Hao tsks and keeps his hips in one place, pulling out all the way to the tip.
“Big…” Hanbin whimpers quietly. But he can tell Hao hears him because he groans and drapes himself over Hanbin’s back, grabbing his waist as he plunges back in.
His hot breath ghosts against Hanbin’s ear with each gentle thrust. He tries to suppress a moan when Hao bites down lightly on the cartilage, the way he’s obviously trying so hard to hold back making him feel a little dizzy.
Hao starts slowly with gentle, languid thrusts, checking in on Hanbin every now and then to make sure he’s okay. Something in his chest flutters.
“You can go faster,” Hanbin finds himself murmuring.
Then Hao angles his hips so he fucks directly into Hanbin’s prostate, and the latter falls limp beneath him with a cry, ass held up in the air by Hao.
Like this, each thrust precisely hits that spot, and Hao speeds up, mouthing at his neck as his hips slap against Hanbin’s ass. His cold hands roam along Hanbin’s body, stopping at his chest to pinch at his nipples.
“Hao,” He gasps out, back arching, “Hao, it feels so good—!”
“You’re taking me so well,” Hao groans into his ear, clearly just as affected as Hanbin. “You’re so good for me…”
“Mmh-” Hanbin buries his face in the pillow to muffle himself, knuckles turning white as he clutches at the sheets. A yelp makes its way out of his throat when Hao roughly tugs at his hair to lift his head back up.
“Don’t hide.”
Hanbin mewls and sobs from the overwhelming sensations, letting out lewd, high pitched noises, ones he’d never known he was even capable of making. He whines something incoherent about it being too much for him, but he really doesn’t mean it.
As if pretending not to hear him, or maybe because he heard him, Hao sets an even more brutal pace, ramming his cock ruthlessly into him. Harder, faster, Hanbin finds himself crying out. His eyes roll back into his head, tongue lolling out of his mouth. He feels his orgasm creeping up on him already.
Hanbin’s so sensitive, shivering at every touch, trembling and falling apart beneath Hao. He’d never known sex of all things could feel this good, and all it took was a change in position. Though, he’s unsure of what his next move is after this. Do he and Hao count as friends with benefits now?
Shaken out of his thoughts by a slap on his ass, breathy noises spill from his lips. Hanbin bounces up on the bed with each hard thrust from Hao, hands desperately grasping at the sheets. “Close—”
And just when he’s on the brink of coming, Hao covers his slit with his finger and his hips still. The feeling of being on the brink of his orgasm slips away, leaving him hollow and leaking pathetically against his stomach.
“No, why…!” He wails, red-rimmed eyes tearing up.
“Sorry.” Hao removes his hand, planting it on the bed instead. “Habit of mine.”
Hanbin feels all warm and hazy and he whines, a tear slipping down his cheek when Hao pulls out. He shushes him gently, flipping him over into his back and kissing away the tear. Hanbin’s brain malfunctions a little.
“Here.” He slings Hanbin’s leg over his shoulder, spreading the other one to the side.
A relieved sigh leaves Hanbin when his cock pushes back in, filling him perfectly again. He hooks his arms around Hao’s neck, looking up at him with glossy eyes through wet eyelashes.
“Pretty.”
Hanbin blinks, still dazed. Him? Pretty? He raises a hand to point to himself, making a questioning noise.
“Yes, you.” He laughs, brushing the stray hairs out of his face. “You’re always so pretty, Hanbin.”
Heat rises up his cheeks. “You’re prettier.” He murmurs softly.
But he’s silenced again, this time not by a pillow but something soft and warm — lips. Hao’s lips on his, to be exact. The touch leaves as quickly as it comes, leaving him frozen and terribly hot.
Hao just actually kissed him.
What the fuck.
He’s left with no time to think about it when Hao pulls out to the tip and shoves his cock all the way back in with one thrust, Hanbin’s mouth falling open in an ‘o’ shape. Hao begins to pound into him mercilessly, even more so than before. Hanbin gasps and whimpers, pleading meaninglessly for him to slow down, slow down. To which he can see that Hao tries to, but his hips are still rutting against him animalistically, fingers digging into his hips just barely hard enough to leave marks.
Hao splays his hand over Hanbin’s belly, and it’s there, a slight bulge where his cock is moving inside him. “That’s me,” Hao grins, looking awfully proud.
A shudder passes through Hanbin’s body, and he keens high in his throat as Hao returns to fucking right into his sweet spot. He sobs, clutches at Hao’s shoulders and rakes his nails down his back. Tiny, staccato noises fall from his lips as Hao strokes his cock just one, two times and he’s coming, painting their stomachs white. Hao tucks his head into Hanbin’s neck, hips stuttering.
Hanbin musters up the last of his strength to lock his legs around Hao’s waist so he can’t pull out, trapping him inside. They’re using a condom (practicing safe sex, Hanbin had insisted the day before even though both of them were tested clean. In reality, he was really just too nervous to go raw), so he won’t even feel it filling him anyway, but he can’t help but dream. Maybe another day, he’ll ask Hao to do this again. Maybe.
“Mine.” Hao lets out a guttural moan, burying his cock as deep as possible as he releases into the condom, nails digging into Hanbin’s sides. Hanbin would be overthinking that single, probably spur-of-the-moment word if not for the overwhelming aftershocks of his orgasm.
He collapses on top of Hanbin, softening cock shifting slightly inside him as they both catch their breaths, chests heaving. They lie there in comfortable silence, simply basking in each other’s presence.
Hanbin is on the verge of drifting away to sleep when Hao clears his throat.
“So… are you sure you’re straight?”