1813

by crunchy_nitrogen

Summary:

Following the death of her father, Kit works as a governess in Lord Canady's household. Bored by the monotony of life in the Arkanis county, and with no prospects to offer a suitor, she longs for adventure and purpose. A chance meeting with two strangers will set in motion a series of events that change Kit's life forever. Follow her adventures through war, loss and betrayal - and maybe even love.

OR

An AU set in 1813 regency era, in which the First Order serve as the military for the powerful King Snoke. Planets are now counties and shires, and TIE fighters are horses. You get the idea. Heavily inspired by Pride and Prejudice with a bit of Jane Eyre thrown in. Also a hint of Star Wars if you squint.

(tagged as 'x reader' but I replaced it with an OFC with minimal physical description)

Notes:

Hey there! Here's the result of a Pride and Prejudice (2005) rewatch the same day as a Star Wars marathon. Enjoy!

Chapter 1: Kit

Canady Hall was stifling. With its warm brick façade and fireplaces littered throughout the plentiful chambers, the whole building seemed to swell with hot air. It emanated from cooking pots, sweating servants and warm mouths, chattering well into the night about the Arkanis county's latest scandal - or, more often than not, the movements of the regiment. Such was to be expected in a loyalist county so far removed from the capitol, especially one whose inhabitants' lives were all in some way intertwined with those of the First Order Army.

The blood-red military jackets were a familiar sign within the township, and one currently hung above the hearth of Canady Hall. Pressed in between two glass panes and framed by a gold dusted wood, the embroidered stripes that signalled the rank of major general glistened lavishly, as though the garment had seen little use. As Kit passed underneath it, she allowed a quick glimpse to the uniform, wondering how it would have looked when worn by its owner. She had only ever known him to wear the coat and tails common among the other lords, having begun work for him following his retirement from the regiment.

As the distant sound of voices continued to flow from the drawing room, Kit recomposed herself, tearing away from the scorch of the fireplace's tendrils. No-one would come looking for her. They were too deep into their cups by this time of night. And it wasn't outside her character to forgo these dinner parties - she detested small talk and found that she tired of bridge by the second round. Besides, as a governess, it felt almost improper to mingle with her employer's acquaintances.

Hoisting the tanned leather coat from the rack, she pulled it over her nightgown, concealing a small satchel she had snuck from her room. A subtle, earthy scent lingered around her for a moment, but was pulled away in favour of the suffocating mixture of cigar smoke and dark wood so often present in Canady Hall. Why the man fostered such a habit even in the presence of his daughter, Kit could not understand.

The young governess continued towards the grand doors, light on her feet and confident in the fact that she had witnessed the butler retire for bed nearly an hour ago. She was no prisoner in this house, and often free to come and go at her leisure. But a young, unmarried woman walking the grounds at night was not looked upon lightly by society - so for the sake of her and her sisters' reputations, she acted under the cover of darkness.

One last breath was taken in the humidity of the grand hall, before her lungs were filled with the soothing cool of the night's air. Careful not to slam the door upon her exit, Kit made her way down the cobbled steps, drawing the coat closer to her frame. This journey she would complete on foot, as a horse would be too obvious. She detested the idea of the stable hand asking of her destination and responding with questioning and judging glances.

The trek from Canady Hall to Colonel House was a familiar route. Composed of wild grasses and moorland, it was a pleasant walk during the daytime, but became far more treacherous in the evening. One foot misplaced would find its owner knee deep in mud, ruining gowns and shoes alike. Kit had spent many months in the latter part of her youth venturing back and forth between the two estates, memorising the path that steered clear of all gown-ruining obstructions. The familiar sedges and wildflowers tickled the skin of her ankles as she waded through the fields. On such a cool night, the moors were hushed - save for the low hum of its amphibian inhabitants. With no trees to shield her from the gales that crept across the grounds, she was at the mercy of the elements. Loose ringlets of hair flew across her face, sticking to her lips and caressing and her cheeks. The biting chill brought a pink hue to the tips of her nose and ears, similar to the bite of freshly fallen snow.

Coming to the clearing that marked the end of Canady's land and the beginning of Colonel House estate, Kit came to a halt, surveying the grounds before her. Silent, still and devoid of any persons who would question her presence on their land. Exactly as she predicted.

The governess now moved at a leisurely pace, taking in the surroundings that were not too long ago so very familiar. A dip between two mounds that signalled the badger burrow, followed by the string of thistles that led to the berry bush. These were the playgrounds of her childhood - where she had danced and laughed with her sisters until her father would yell from the steps of Colonel House that it was supper time.

To be given just one more day like that was all Kit could wish for. Yet tonight, she would content herself with wallowing in the past and reflecting on better days.

The willow by the lake had often served as the location for such instances. Sitting directly opposite the grand façade of Colonel House, its boughs would drape over the water's edge, producing a continuous echo of ripples across the surface. When standing beneath it, one felt safe and protected by some magical force that she couldn't quite place. So it was no wonder that tonight Kit found herself seated beneath the trunk of the willow, reclining into the ancient bark.

When her father had been master of Colonel House, it was always filled with light. And before her mother's abandonment, there may have even been laughter. But what stood before Kit now was merely an imitation of its previous liveliness; only a single candle was visible in one of the upper bedrooms. Probably the one that used to belong to her parents. So, the new colonel of the 22nd regiment had finally taken up his military-provided lodgings - whoever he may be. This likely meant the return of the 22nd to Arkanis, much to Kit's dismay.

She had not seen her father's old regiment since his passing. It was odd to think that someone else could so easily take his place - take his job, his lodgings, eat with the men who carried his coffin from the church. And the superiors who practically signed his death warrant by sending his regiment to the frontlines of Craitshire would likely return the favour for the next colonel. Such is the way of war, yet it planted a seed of hatred for the over-privileged leaders of the First Order, who had likely never seen combat themselves.

It had only been three years. Three years to the day that Kit received the notice of death, when she and her sisters were rendered parentless by a single piece of parchment.

Soon after, the casual lessons taught to Canady's daughter became a lifeline. At the request of his new and much younger wife, Kit's tutorship morphed into a fully fledged governess role, complete with lodgings. Gone was the genteel eldest daughter of the colonel, and in her place the quiet and unassuming governess.

In the dark embrace of the evening, Kit could finally be alone in her thoughts. The battered coat she had taken such efforts to bring did little to actually keep out the cold, and Kit wondered if it had served her father similarly, back when it belonged to him. All the other belongings in their former house were technically property of the regiment - supplied to him as part of the position he occupied. Backed by the pockets of King Snoke, the First Order military liked the appearance of wealth; dressing its soldiers in finery, throwing lavish balls and supplying its leaders with respectable estates. Yet the reality was the same as any army during a time of civil war - poor wages, poor conditions and a very high likelihood of death.

Remembering the satchel hidden beneath her coat, Kit drew the small bag open, revealing a circular bottle of amber liquid. While it once adorned the top of her father's liquor cabinet, it spent most of its days now hidden away in the trunk that contained the remainder of her childhood possessions. Though on the anniversary of her father's death, it got to see some use.

Made legible by the rays of moonlight seeping through the branches of the willow, Kit could read the inscription on the bottle,

To Col. Otto Vara,

For thirty years of service to the First Order Army.

How her father spent thirty years in service to the same people, she could not understand. Even working for Canady for the past three was enough to foster a forceful desire to leave Arkanis forever and seek new horizons. But where would she go? Her education would serve her well, allowing for her to easily procure a governess role in another shire or county. But then she would fall into the same cycle. The children would grow old, she would move onto the next household and still she would remain bored an unsatisfied with her meagre existence as an accessory to society and nothing more.

The Kit of ten years ago may have been content with such existence, but now, Katherine Vara longed for something beyond a monotonous life of teaching and pleasantries.

She had dwelled on herself for too long, and it was time to drink a toast to her father. Kit uncapped the bottle and took a swig, wincing at the burn of the whisky as it descended to her stomach. A slight calming sensation echoed through her limbs, settling in the soles of her feet. She had never really been fond of whisky. But on the same day for the past three years, she had allowed herself this small concession. She had even considered recruiting her younger sisters for these annual escapades; yet one was not the type to enjoy a late night sojourn and the other was too caught up in the household duties of being a lord's wife - though they were few and far between.

So it was once again Kit left to her lonesome by the lake. She allowed the bottle to rest against the roots of the willow, before exiting the cover of its branches to reach the edge of the water. It was almost beautiful - the way the candlelight within the house reflected onto the dark expanse before her. The soft yellows mixing with the pale brightness of the moon reminded her of a painting that once hung in her room; a depiction of a lakeside town in the Naboo district.

But she could not reconcile the apparent tranquility of the scene, as that candlelight - that warmth - had once belonged to her family. It was in that moment that it all came washing over her. The stolen childhood years at the abandonment of her mother. Stepping into her role at the age of thirteen and never having the chance to engage in society because of it. Spending all her time ensuring that her sisters did not have to suffer in the same way she had. The months and sometimes years spent without her father when he was leading the regiment. And then his death and the utter emptiness and silence that followed.

Drawing breath had become a difficult task, as Kit let out a strangled sob. She had learnt over the years that an emotional woman was the bane of society - electing to bottle her feelings and let them fester within her until they evaporated entirely. These feelings were a weakness that she could only afford to show in rare moments of complete solitude like tonight.

Or at least, she had perceived it to be solitude.

Turning back to the path she had trod, Kit observed the shift of the clouds until they obstructed the moon, blanketing the moorland in true darkness. The frogs seemed to still their voices, while the wind ceased all movement. This eerie sense pervaded for several moments until it was disturbed by the sound of hoofbeats drawing increasingly nearer.

She was sure Canady's horses were stabled for the night, and she had spied none when passing Colonel House. As the hooves rose in volume, they raced to match the heart beating in her ears. Closer and closer they drew, galloping at such a speed that a gust of air seemed to build before her. Until those hooves were upon her, rearing up and knocking her backwards.

Grasping for anything to hold her upright, Kit flailed with no success. Feeling weightless for an instant, she could do nothing but allow herself to drift with the force of the motion - only to be met with the icy embrace of the lake below.

Chapter 2: Chance encounters

Kit had always thought her own death would be something peaceful; in a bed or a hospital at the least. She did not think it would end at the bottom of a lakebed, alone and forgotten like a stray fishing line. Surrendering to the gentle sway of the water, her mind stilled and she was for the first time, at peace.

But something from above broke her moment of tranquility.

They were hands, reaching down into the depths and pulling her from her icy grave. Seemingly absent of bodily control, Kit could only observe as she was hoisted back into the evening air.

The first thing she noticed was that her saviour was warm. Not like the singeing heat of a fire or the choking humidity of Canady Hall; he was like the mellow warmth offered by a blanket on a winter's morning. He was also quite sturdy - carrying her bodily from the lake to place her gently onto her feet by the trunk of the willow.

Still quite unsteady, she instinctively grabbed for an arm, where she could feel a band of tight muscle move beneath. She was hearing an unsteady chorus of deep breaths, and when she finally came to, realised they were not her own but that of her rescuer.

"Are you alright?"

The worlds were hard to make out, but she could feel that they were laced with concern - and spoken with a sharp accent.

Still in shock and unable to respond, her silence prompted the man to place his hand on her forehead, and in her daze did nothing to stop him.

He made a small inhale of shock.

"God, you're freezing..."

Her mind not completely focused, she spoke without thinking.

"No, it's alright really. I- I am quite fond of the water. I even like to walk in the rain. It's... soothing."

Even in her daze she was attempting to people please. A few slow blinks, and Kit's vision had returned. She found herself face to face with dark green eyes, framed by creased brows and ginger hair.

"You... like the rain? I see," came the reply - short and somewhat taken aback. He seemed to think for a moment before continuing, "You are shivering. Here, let me."

At this, he removed the greatcoat that hung from his shoulders and motioned it toward her. It was now that she realised how deep the cold had seeped, her own coat and nightgown clinging to her skin.

She peeled away her leather outer layer, feeling a momentary relief as the weight was lifted from her frame. And she did not fail to notice the man's lingering eyes on her chest, outlined by the drenched nightgown. Seeming to catch himself, he replaced her soiled coat with his own, dwarfing her body and trailing on the ground below.

"I am terribly sorry. These lands, they are unfamiliar to me. The last thing I expected was a wandering lady."

With some warmth back in her cheeks, she could now properly take in the man before her. His white dress shirt hung lopsided to one shoulder, while his hair was dishevelled and sticking up in several directions. Even in the darkness, she could make out a small amount of stubble that littered his jaw. He did not look overly well put together - quite rugged actually. It reminded her of a farmer or blacksmith, and she wondered briefly of his occupation.

"No, you must forgive me - it appears I spooked your horse."

He chuckled at this before replying, "But it was my horse that knocked you into the lake."

"I-," she began to rebut, but noticed a glint of red reflecting in the now re-appeared moonlight. "Oh, sir you... you are bleeding."

The fiery-haired man took survey of his body, finally holding up his hand, and watching as a steady stream of red trickled down his forearm and into the sleeve of his shirt.

"Ah, it must have happened when I fell from my horse. This night continues to amaze me."

At this, the man winced - appearing to have now felt the sting of the gash that spread from his thumb to ring finger. Without a second thought, Kit took hold of his digits, careful to avoid the wound.

"I can see a trace of dirt in this, it will need cleaning."

He considered her for a while, surprised at her sudden ability to think clearly after her late night dip. "It is alright, I will seek a doctor in the morning."

The girl frowned - her displeasure clear in the crease of her eyebrows. "I think not - this could fester overnight if not treated. Let me help."

Suddenly, Kit was ripping the bottom hem of her nightgown - now partially dry - into a long strip that nearly resembled a bandage. The man's alarm was clear on his face, yet he remained silent as he watched the young woman take something from a satchel. She returned with what looked like to be a sort of alcohol and popped the lid with one hand.

"Now, this may hurt. Take a deep breath," he complied, then Kit was pouring her father's whisky over the wound; ensuring all visible pieces of dirt were flushed out. He remained silent, yet she could see his body tensing at the sensation. "Feeling alright?"

"Yes," came the clipped answer, uttered through clenched teeth.

Proceeding, the young woman draped her torn piece of nightgown across his hand and underneath it, slowly wrapping the wound as she went.

"What is your name?" he asked, his breathing now settled back to a normal rhythm.

"Kit," she supplied. He was a stranger after all, and did not need to know that she was the daughter of the deceased colonel who once used to own the very estate they currently found themselves on.

He was quiet while he watched her nimble fingers working, but softly divulged his own name.

"Armitage," followed by a ghost of a smile. Coming to the end of the cloth, she tucked it tightly into the folds she had created and set his hand aside. He continued on. "Miss Kit - that is, you are a 'Miss', yes?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"Would you allow me to escort you to the house? I am sure there is a fire you could make use of."

"Oh, no that will not be necessary," the words toppled out in a panic.

"But-"

"I am only located at Canady Hall - it is but one estate over. I shall be fine to return on foot."

Armitage's face was evidence enough of her poor argument, and certainly not assisted by the shiver she let out. Suddenly his face changed, almost in recognition.

"Did you say Canady Hall - as in Lord Canady - the retired Major General?"

"The very same. You know of him?"

"I have unfortunately had the displeasure. You are one of his workers, I suppose?" It was said in a non-accusatory way - more curious if anything.

"Is it that obvious?" Kit looked down at her attire, quickly wrapping his coat closer to her when she took full notice of her appearance. A faint blush began to dust her cheeks.

A similar reaction was elicited in the man, yet his towering height hid it from her line of sight. "I was merely asking," he broke the tension. "You must at least let me return you to Canady Hall. I could not forgive myself if I left you out here to freeze, alone."

Kit considered her options; hold onto the shred of pride that remained and refuse his help, but likely die of hypothermia - or sacrifice her remaining dignity and and accept the offer.

She had already nearly died once tonight - what was one more? Yet the thought of diving into bed under the warmth of her blankets proved too enticing.

"I will allow it."

He looked relieved at her acceptance, immediately drawing the horse to her side and handing her the leather coat and satchel she had foregone. Out of habit, she moved to step into the first stirrup, only to find herself hoisted up and onto the horse by strong arms. The warmth of his touch lingered long after it had left, and soon she felt his presence at her back, joining her on the saddle.

He adjusted himself behind her, moving further into the seat and unknowingly ushering her hips forward. His arms encased her on either side, coming to hold the reins in the front.

"I couldn't have you fall into a lake and off my horse," he jested.

She huffed in amusement and they settled into a comfortable silence as he navigated the terrain of the moors.

As the Hall came into view, Armitage slowed his horse. "Where shall I take you to?"

"If you see that green door by the back, that is the servant's entry. No-one will be awake, so I won't be seen," she said, unknowingly dropping to a whisper.

Upon reaching the cobbled pathway, Armitage removed himself from the saddle and assisted her down once more. She did not fail to notice the sharp inhale of breath when his right hand was used, obviously still aching.

"It will heal in time - it just needs a doctor's attention to prevent scarring," she nodded towards his hand.

"Of those I am quite familiar," he smiled to himself.

Whether he meant doctors or scars, she did not question. She simply took these last moments to regard the kind stranger - Armitage, as she now knew - and she internally remarked that she had never seen hair with such a lovely hue.

"Thank you, again, for saving me. And sorry about your hand. But I must be going - I have stayed out too long," her hurried words rendered her nearly breathless.

He sighed. "Ah, then I should bid you goodnight, Miss Kit. I hope you find somewhere warm to spend the remainder of your evening."

Armitage gave a short nod before remounting his horse. It looked as though he were about to turn away, but before galloping off, he spoke over his shoulder.

"Just don't drink that whisky all in one night."

Notes:

If you enjoyed this (or didn't) be sure to let me know what you think! And happy Bridgerton release day to everyone watching - I can't believe we have to wait another two years!

Happy reading.

Chapter 3: Sisters

Summary:

We learn more about Kit's family

"Kit. Kit, wake up."

The words sounded as if they were underwater. Dancing and twisting through the waves that hung over her head in her dream-fuelled slumber. 

"Jus' five more minutes," came Kit's hazy reply, followed by a blanket pulled over her head.

"Oh come on - you're normally the one waking me up. Thought it was high time I returned the favour." The last syllable was punctuated with the smack of a pillow to Kit's concealed head; a tired groan muffled into the sheets in response. "Besides, I hear the regiment is in town."

Now at least partially awake, Kit sat up against the headboard and glared at her sister. "Of course you would hear that. " A roll of the eyes, followed by a silence between the two. 

"Don't be like that, Kit."

"Like what?"

"I can feel you judging me."

"I am not!" A pause. "Well, I just think-'

"Here we go..."

"That maybe your time would be better spent in other... endeavours."

"Is trying to find a husband not a suitable enough endeavour for your liking?" The words had some fire behind them. 

It was too early for this. After the eventful evening past, Kit wished she could remain abed all day. Curled up in the sheets and blissfully unaware of the whereabouts of the regiment, or the town festivities that were bound to follow. Maybe she would spend it thinking about the man from last night. A painful few weeks were certain to follow. 

"Jayne, can we please not do this now? I have lessons today and I need this time to rest."

"Mmm, because your evening was just so strenuous, wasn't it? We all saw you slink to bed after dessert." 

Kit had often wondered when her sister became so cutting. What often began as a simple jest between the pair  frequently morphed into a battle of arguments at her choosing. Their father had always been adept at dealing with it - simply laughing at her ridiculousness and refusing to be baited by her harsh words. Kit preferred to just ignore her entirely, as they would always return to friends within the following hour. 

"It was a very filling meal," Kit followed with a chuckle. 

That seemed to soothe the tension - if there ever was any. Jayne came to stand by the bed, perpendicular to where Kit was sitting. Flopping face down into the blanket, the younger girl let out a loud sigh, blonde curls spilling over her head. 

"I still can't believe that Dany is the married one."

"What? So you'd rather be married to Canady? She did us a favour there."

Jayne snickered at this. "God no. I just thought by now my prince charming would have come striding in on a horse and rescued me."

Her sister's statement brought with it reminders of her late night sojourn across the moorlands, and the man whose hand she had cradled so tenderly. She could still feel that hand now; large but very angular and rougher than it appeared. She was by now quite convinced he must have been a farmer of some sort. 

"Something tells me the chances of that are very low." Kit threw a pillow at Jayne's head to emphasise her point.

"Ah, then I shall just have to follow in your footsteps." She cleared her throat, preparing to use that mocking voice she always used to imitate Kit. 

"Please don't."

"Look at me, I'm a governess! I work for my keep. Even though my sister's husband is the one handing over the coppers. I am just sooo independent!"

"Freeloader."

"You had the option too, remember?" She halted the mocking tone. "Canady said that as sisters of his wife we were welcome to stay. Someone just had to feel useful, didn't she?"

"Hey, I'm doing a good thing - Vivienne is excelling. We have a special step-aunt step-niece bond."

"I'm sure you do. What about when Dany has her own children with Canady? You'll teach them too?"

"Let's hope for my sake they're all boys."

Jayne was giggling loudly now, finally deciding to remove herself from the bed. 

"Well there is only one way to find out, and that involves seeing your other sister. So, up you get." The girl whisked the blankets from Kit's bed and threw them to the side. 

"There's no arguing with you, is there?"

"Nope. None at all."

---

"Ah, look who finally decided to join us," the masculine voice echoed off the lavish walls of the dining room. Though little over fifty years of age, Lord Moden Canady bore the countenance of someone much his senior. Most would attribute this to his time served in the First Order army, but it was known to a small few that his rank was provided purely as a result of his title as lord - meaning he rarely ever saw action. Yet the man himself was respectable as far as lords go, and was now indisputably part of Kit's family through his marriage to her middle sister, Dany.

"Jayne, Kit. A pleasant morning is it not?" asked the sister in question, cutting into the eggs she'd been served for breakfast. 

Jayne gave a tired yawn that scrunched her pretty face. "Not particularly. I've never been fond of mornings." She took a seat opposite Dany, while Kit sat beside. The two elder sisters had never been quite as good-looking as Jayne; as the pair were cursed with the thick eyebrows and dark eyes of their father while Jayne was gifted with the lighter, more feminine features of their mother. 

"Well, yes - but surely you saw the lovely sunrise we were blessed with? It must have been foggy last night to have such clear skies today."

"It was certainly foggy," Kit spoke up, immediately realising her mistake. 

"Was it now?" questioned Canady. 

"From what the servants have told me, that is," she quickly deflected. Jayne offered a curious glance, but said nothing. 

"In any case, Moden and I were watching it, thinking what a lovely welcome it was for the regiment! They are in town, you see."

Kit ceased buttering the piece of toast she had procured, letting out a slow exhale to calm her irritation. All anybody in Arkanis wanted to talk about was the regiment. She was born into talk of the regiment - her own birth being the topic of interest for a while amongst officers' wives until Dany and Jayne came along. Then her mother's desertion toppled all other topics. 

And while she knew it was inevitable, she dreaded the day she'd be forced to feign polite conversation with her father's successor; likely a wealthy over-privileged lord like Canady, put in a position of power by the pompous higher ranking generals. The very same who denied her father's request of a retreat and led them into the slaughter at Craitshire. 

His last letter still remained seared into her memory. How he wrote about his fears for the future, as they marched to the battlefield. There was a sense of dread in his words - foreboding even - as he had written to his superiors requesting they regroup and send scouts before marching. Yet all requests were denied, and as an otherwise powerless colonel, he had no choice but to obey. 

"Kit? What say you?" questioned the lord.

"Pardon?"

"Daydreaming again," snickered Jayne. Kit kicked her under the table. 

"I was inquiring after Vivienne's lessons. Pianoforte and French today, yes?

"Arithmetic and French, actually. She is just about able to have a proper conversation without consulting her books." Kit smiled to herself, a genuine expression. 

"Ah, my mistake. I hear her abusing that instrument so often that I doubt the lessons have ever ceased." Dany attempted to hide her grin beneath a napkin, but the sisters caught her expression clearly. 

They were an odd couple; certainly different in age, but alike in many other ways. Their dry humour was matched for one, and they both recognised the convenience that their marriage would allow the other. Where Canady received a lady of the house to oversee the daughter from his previous marriage (and someone to provide more heirs), Dany was provided wealth and a home for her sisters in the wake of their father's passing. Besides, Dany had always had a refined motherly attitude about her, and now she had the station and title to support it. She differed from Jayne in that way, who had such lavish tastes but no funds or husband to enable such behaviour. 

"She is an exceptionally capable student." Kit replaced her fork, now finished with breakfast. "And I shall attend to her shortly." She looked to the footman at the door, suddenly remembering. "Any mail today?"

The young man nodded. "Just one, Miss - addressed to 'Lady Canady and family'."

"That's new," remarked Jayne. 

"Oh! Maybe it is from one of my charities; I have been donating in your names," suggested Dany.

"How very thoughtful, dear," came Canady's response. "Hand it here, I can tell the suspense is eating at them."

Canady removed the envelope from the tray proffered to him, as was expected by the man of the house. 

"Let us see," he mused, placing his spectacles atop the bridge of his nose. "This letter comes from a Dopheld Mitaka. An acquaintance of yours?" A questioning glance around at the sisters. 

"Not that we know of," said Kit. 

"He writes to tell you that..." Canady ceased his words, eyes rapidly scanning the letter and widening as he went. Finally, he looked up at the sisters from behind the eyewear. "You will not believe this."

"Believe what?" asked Jayne, tone now heightened. 

"You have a cousin. Related somehow through your mother's side. And not only that," Canady paused to look at Kit, "he is now Colonel of the 22nd regiment."

"Which means he-" Dany began.

"Will be staying in Arkanis with the rest of the regiment," Jayne finished. 

"And-"

"Will take up residence in Colonel House," Kit chimed in grimly. The very moment she had been dreading had been laid before her. She had lived for so long in ignorant bliss at the appointment of a successor - though he had likely held the position for over two years at this stage. But now that she had a name to put to the title, things were different; and the added familial aspect complicated them even further. 

Who was this man? The lack of a lordship in front of his name signalled that he may have earnt his position through hard work - not too unlike her father. But why was he writing to them - to all three sisters? 

"Has he outlined his intentions in contacting us?" Kit questioned through the haze of thoughts. 

"He offers condolences for the loss of your father, and since he will be in town, wishes to rebuild the family connection." Canady stared at the letter once more, seeming to notice something. "Oh! And he invites you all to a ball being thrown in the regiment's honour. He requests that you all be properly introduced then."

"When is it?" Jayne asked excitedly - eyes ablaze with interest. 

"Three days."

And what an agonising three days those would be. 

Notes:

Sorry if this felt like an exposition dump! Just had to get it out of the way. There will be Hux and Kylo in the next chapter, so sit tight!!

Chapter 4: A Ball

Summary:

Kit attends the ball and makes a new acquaintance. Or two. Three?

Kit had not felt this out of place since she was sixteen and attending her first ball. She had been young and naïve then; full of hope that there she would meet her future husband and begin a whirlwind romantic courtship. The reality had been far less appealing - with the only available suitors being old, retired soldiers ready for their second marriage, or gangly young men who were not accepted by the regiment on account of their poor health. 

Nothing much had changed, she observed. Except that now the regiment held command over the ballroom, and in fact much of the town. 

So, this was how she was destined to spend the night; her back pressed against the wall and a glass of sweet wine in one hand. Kit had even forgone the purchase of a dance card, with no intention of standing up with any man - though the chance of her being asked to dance was very low to begin with. 

"You cannot spend the whole night standing there, Kit," said Jayne, having just finished a dance with a young officer. She took the glass from Kit's hand and gracefully downed its contents. 

"Oh, I fully intend to. That is, until we find that mystery cousin of ours."

"Ah yes, our new Colonel Dopheld Mitaka." Jayne smirked. "Be careful he doesn't propose marriage right away - at least make him wait a week."

Kit was thankful she no longer had her drink, for she would have spat it out. "I beg your pardon? Marriage? We do not even know the man - or anything about his character other than his rank!"

Jayne set down the glass. "Yes - precisely why he is seeking an introduction this evening, I wager." 

"But-"

"And, he is a decent man by the contents of his letter - and marrying the fatherless eldest daughter of his predecessor who just happens to be a distant cousin seems an awfully decent thing to do." 

"Jayne, you cannot be serious." Kit pulled her sister off to the side. "I am not Dany - I do not want a husband out of pity!" she yelled in a whisper. 

"You are so harsh, sister. They are perfectly happy, and... oh, would you look at that." Jayne's gaze drifted to the other side of the ballroom - landing on Dany and Canady. Yet there was another figure beside them. 

Standing a little under six foot, a young man in uniform was engaged in light conversation - what looked to be a series of first introductions. From her place across the ballroom, Kit could make out his cropped dark hair, covered presently with an army cap; the same make and colour that her father used to don. 

So this was the cousin.

Kit was not sure what she expected - yet this was not it. He seemed just so... plain. Normal. Certainly not cruel enough looking to serve as a vessel for her anger. There was even a gentleness to his brow, as he furrowed it in an expression that immediately turned light-hearted and made Dany smile. 

"Huh. He's not bad looking," commented Jayne. Kit swatted her.

The pair exchanged some sort of joke, leading the two of them into a bout of laughter, and Kit watched as Dany grasped his arm and pointed over to where she and Jayne stood. 

"I fear we have just been  discovered." Kit tried not to grimace. Fear was not exactly the right word to describe how she felt - closer to dread. What if he truly wished to keep an acquaintance? Kit recalled Jayne's comment of marriage and it sent a blush to her cheeks. She had never even been courted, and to begin now would be nothing short of embarrassing. Not to mention the condescending glances her sisters would give if it were to happen - despite Jayne not even being married. 

From across the room, Dany called them over, "Kit! Jayne! Come meet our cousin!"

"Best turn on that charm, sweet sister," Jayne said lowly, grabbing a new champagne flute from the table as she pulled Kit to the other side of the room. She could do nothing but be motioned along, powerless until she was standing in front of her distant relation.

Before she had a chance to make a fool of herself, Dany stepped in to make the introductions, as was her role as the married woman who first received the correspondence. 

"Sisters, meet Dopheld Mitaka - recently returned from Jakkushire. And now promoted to colonel!"

He seemed to look down at this, a light pink dusting his nose. But he grinned to himself and started to speak. 

"A pleasure to make your acquaintance, cousins." He seemed to pause and glance between the sisters. He looked to the youngest. "Miss Jayne Vara?" 

Jayne seemed delighted. "Yes, cousin."

He smiled at her. 

"And Miss Vara?" To Kit now. She could only smile back.

"Kit, if you please, Colonel" she finally responded, "or Katherine if you're feeling formal." 

Oddly enough, the joke made him chuckle. Her sisters had never given it that reaction, and she was quite pleased with herself. 

"Kit it is then. But only if you promise not to call me Colonel. It feels... strange using it outside the field." He seemed to remember something now, "And... recent events considered." The words trailed off towards the end.

Kit gauged his meaning as she observed the remorse in his voice.  

"Yes, it was a tragedy. Otto was a good colonel - an even better man," Canady finally chimed in, though his words seemed rehearsed and lacking emotion. 

"I was very sorry to hear of his passing; you see I did not ever have the opportunity to meet your father, but tales of his military prowess are known amongst all officers." A pause, wherein he directed his next words to Kit. "And so when I learnt of our common relations, I knew that I must establish some form of correspondence. Even if it was just through writing - I wanted to pay the proper respects." He stopped there, suddenly aware of his rambling. He straightened his uniform and looked away. Their cousin was shy, it seemed.

"And we thank you for it, cousin. I know that Kit here was very intrigued by your arrival," Jayne stated, sickly sweet, while Kit glared daggers at her. 

"Oh? Truly? I would offer a dance, yet I am far too clumsy on my feet." He gave a lopsided smile. 

"That is alright - so is she! Go on, sit - converse. Discuss whatever have you," blustered Dany, grabbing both Kit and Mitaka's arms and pushing them towards a small table by the window. At least it was far enough out of the way that they could remain unnoticed. 

The pair found themselves seated, with nothing else to do but stare at each other awkwardly until someone broke the tension. 

Not standing it any longer, Kit let out a defeated sigh. Willing herself to speak, she found that she could not keep up the fake niceties so common at these sorts of events, and instead approached the conversation with candor.

"I am sorry about my family. They can come off a bit strong sometimes. It's a little overwhelming, I imagine."

He chuckled lightly. "It is alright. They are a good change from the regiment, to say the least."

"The regiment can't be that bad."

"Oh you'd be surprised. Fifty injured men, all brought to my camp with nowhere to put them or supplies to heal them. No doctor wants to work on the field, so we're left to do it ourselves. And they only started a nurse brigade a month ago - but still the chaos of it all is enough to last a lifetime." 

"You have women in the field?" Kit asked far too quickly.

"Yes - though many are widows or wives of officers. We don't get too many like yourself."

"Hm. Who would have thought. And here I thought the only jobs for us were a governess or wife."

His eyebrows rose at that. "Dany mentioned you were a governess. Tell me more about that."

---

Though both were initially apprehensive at their new found acquaintance, Kit and Mitaka gladly talked through most of the night. Topics ranged from literature and science and finally to Arkanis society. When he had mentioned that it was not in his intentions to find a wife any time soon, Kit visibly relaxed. Without the fear of talking to a future spouse, she became more open and willing to engage - for he was just family. 

"Somehow I doubt that actually happened," Kit took a sip of her wine, grinning. 

"I promise it did! When I was working as an envoy-"

"You, Colonel Mitaka, worked as an envoy?" She sounded oddly delighted.

"Well we all have to start somewhere. And I was the General's envoy, I'll have you know. I transported a lot of classified information." 

"Is the General too pretentious to transport his own information?"

"I'm not allowed to comment on that, but Hux is certainly a strong character." He was trying not to chuckle at his own words. 

"Gosh, even his name sounds pretentious. Hux. Probably some wealthy lord with nothing to do." She grimaced at the thought. 

"I've heard he's from here. And they say he was quite poor, actually - though he'd never let anyone think that."

"Really? If he's from Arkanis I thought I would have heard of him, or even known his family. I've never met any Huxes." Kit gave a thoughtful glance out the window. "Probably for the better."

"Ah, that would be because of the officer training school. They go around to counties and shires and recruit the most impoverished kids they can find - give them food, water and a job. Then the First Order's got a guaranteed workforce for life."

"That feels like exploitation."

"Yes, but you can't deny it's smart."

"I'll give them that." Kit shook her head in disbelief. "What were we even talking about?"  

"Oh, right. The time I posed as an opera singer to enter into enemy territory! As I was saying, I borrowed the costume from the local theatre, but the pants I took were far too large, so I-"

The words coming from Mitaka seemed to die out, though his mouth was still moving. Ringing echoed through Kit's ears, halting her breathing and stilling her movements. There, across the dancefloor by the door was the red-headed man from the other night - Armitage. Except he had lost all the rugged softness and farmer-like qualities; now all that she could see was the black dress uniform of the high ranking officials - even higher than Mitaka. And his hair. Gone were the soft almost-curls, now slicked back tightly to his head and unmoving as he walked. His eyes seemed the same, yet they were now creased with a permanent expression of displeasure, so unlike the warm kindness she had seen the other night. 

This man was an entirely different person. 

"-but the waiter could not find my name in the book, and he said-"

From their position against the window, Kit and Mitaka were almost concealed from the dancefloor - which she was thankful for, because she presently looked as if she'd seen a ghost. Though that ghost moved with grace and finery as he entered further into the room, appearing to recognise somebody and make a beeline for them. He was not alone this time, she noticed. Following his trail was a much taller, broader man with dark shoulder-length hair and a striking aquiline nose. He seemed to exude power, and where Armitage held a crease in his brow, this man showed nothing but cool indifference. They made quite the striking pair; together the epitome of intimidation. 

Finally reaching his intended destination, Kit drew a gasp as Armitage sidled up to Canady, each giving the other a tight smile and shaking hands upon their recognition. But it was when Dany joined in that Kit nearly passed away.

Always one for friendliness - even to a fault - Dany appeared to immediately begin prattling about some Arkanis gossip that would entertain the younger officers, but from the look on Armitage's face, it had everything but the desired effect. What made it worse, however, was when Dany seemed to double-down on the conversation and grasp Armitage's forearm - as though they were old friends. 

At first he looked taken aback, but then that morphed into poorly hidden disgust, as if her impetuousness personally offended him. His eyes remained trained on the place where her hand met his uniform, and without speaking Dany seemed to understand his feelings very well; removing herself from him before ceasing her chatter. Such was the power he held. The taller man stood behind them all, seeming to have foregone any introductions and choosing to exclude himself from the idle mingling of society. 

Kit could not blame him for that. 

"Cousin - are you quite alright?" Mitaka questioned.

"Oh! Ah - yes, yes quite alright. I think it is all this wine, you see I am quite the light drinker. It doesn't take much," she lied. 

"You and me both, it would appear." He took a sip for good measure. "Though am I right in assuming that you have had enough discussion for one night?" Mitaka questioned with a knowing but light tone. She did not wish to offend him by abandoning their conversation, but she could not focus without knowing who that Armitage man truly was. 

"Am I so easily read?" 

"When you had no reaction to the conclusion of my story - which is quite hilarious in my opinion - I think I could tell that your mind was elsewhere." Mitaka grinned. "But do not worry, we have several weeks ahead of us before the regiment returns to the field. Plenty of time for good conversation then. And maybe I'll re-tell my story - if you ask nicely."

She could not help but let out an airy chuckle. "I shall have to take you up on that offer, cousin." Kit glanced around the room. "Though I see that Jayne is currently unoccupied - maybe you may find a listener yet."

"I like your thinking, Kit. Until we meet again."

Kit watched as her cousin strolled over to the table of drinks, coming to stand beside Jayne and begin what seemed to be a lively conversation. If he did know the two latecomers, he did not notice them - for he appeared all too engrossed in telling his humorous tale once more. 

For once, Kit felt out of place in her solitude. But not for long, she thought, as she suddenly gained the courage to seek out her stranger. Flanking the wall of the ballroom, Kit took slow and calculated steps so that she would not be seen as desperately hurrying over there, though in her mind she was. At least Canady presented a common connection and an introduction could be made through him without too much awkwardness.

At least, that's what she told herself - until her brother-in-law gave the man a parting handshake and moved to the next group of people. 

Frozen as if she were a statue, Kit dared not move. With their backs turned to her, she was directly behind them and within earshot of any and all conversation. Unable to decide on the best course of action, she simply remained in place, and could not help but eavesdrop as they began speaking to one another. 

"Have you ever met such a ghastly woman?" were the first words from Armitage. 

It took all of Kit's willpower to not slap him upside the head. That was Dany he was insulting. Yes, she could be overbearing at times - but ghastly? That was just cruel. 

"Believe it or not, I have met far worse. Are you not enjoying the sights of Arkanis?" the taller man asked, his tone dripping with an odd sense of calm. 

Armitage scoffed. "I would not go as far as to call them sights. What, an old church, a school and miles of rainy moorland? Craitshire was far more appealing - at least the weather was pleasant and there were no wives to accost me. To think - Otto produced... that."

Kit drew slightly nearer at the mention of Craitshire, mentally disregarding that last comment for later. It was the epicentre of the war currently, and to have survived it was a great feat that her father was not so lucky to have achieved. 

"I knew Colonel Vara had daughters, just didn't think they'd be quite so young - or married to Canady for that matter." The taller chuckled to himself. 

"I do not know who I pity more, though I fear that marriage to Canady is quite an extreme punishment following the death of a father" Armitage said lowly. 

The dark haired man sighed. "I hear she has an older sister." Armitage seemed to be left in confused suspense, quirking an eyebrow at the other man. As if the answer were obvious, he continued, "The least you could do is dance with her and make your condolences." 

Armitage dropped his brow and rolled his eyes. "I am in no humour at present to give consequence to old spinsters out of pity. If they cannot handle the realities of war, then that is no responsibility of mine." 

Those words struck like prickled barbs clinging to her skin. Each one hurt because of the partial truths they carried. Yet the nerve of him to say such things without having ever met her - formally at least. While he had so clearly made up his mind about her, Kit decided she had seen all that she needed to form her own opinion of this Armitage character.

Rude, conceited and condescending. He made the imposing man to his left seem like a saint in comparison, for at least his words lacked the scathing assessments Armitage was all too willing to provide. 

Kit no longer desired an introduction, and set about removing herself to her prior position at the back of the ballroom. Or, she tried to, before running straight into Moden Canady. 

"Ah, Kit. There you are." She could smell the whisky on his breath and see the glass in his hand. "I take it that Dopheld proved to be a stimulating conversation partner, eh?"

She shook her head at his implication. "He is a very easy person to talk to, and he is kind with his words. We get along well - as cousins," she reassured. 

"In time, in time. But while I have you here, there are some people I should like to introduce to you to." He put a hand on her back and turned her to face the direction she had come. Another sip from his glass. "Now, these two are quite high ranking - and I would not normally introduce them to others. But they worked with your father, so I thought I'd ought to." 

This could not be happening. She was so close to making her escape - just to be thwarted by Canady. 

"Moden, it is not necessary - I am sure they have better things to do." Kit said frantically.

"Nonsense! They met Dany and seemed to take a shine to her - who doesn't?"

She tried to protest once more, but before she knew it she was back where she started. 

"Gentlemen, apologies for the interruption."

The pair turned to face them, seemingly caught off guard. Yet then she noticed the recognition on Armitage's face. 

It was subtle - with just a slight raise of the eyebrows and opening of the mouth. His pupils may have even dilated slightly. He almost looked fearful. 

The other man just regarded her with curiosity, looking her up and down questionably - sparing a glance to his starstruck companion.  

"May I present my sister-in-law and daughter of Colonel Otto Vara, Miss Katherine Vara." Both paled at that revelation. Now Canady turned to Kit. "And may I present to you Commander Kylo Ren," he motioned to the taller of the two, then to the red-haired man, "and General Armitage Hux."

Notes:

Thank you Jane Austen you are my hero for inspiring Mitaka as Mr Collins but not as cringe hehehe. Please comment and let me know what you think!

Chapter 5: Scorned

Summary:

The continuation of the ball

"A pleasure," cut in Ren. He seemed the only one of the three still completely conscious, for the other two were at present locked in a staring contest. 

The ability with which Armitage had turned from a startled fear to cool indifference merely enraged Kit, electing to hold her gaze with his now hollow stare. Yet there was still such depth in his eyes. The oceanlike chasm that reflected her own fury almost dared her to speak first. And while he was able to hold back any emotion from otherwise clueless onlookers, Kit could do no such thing. She was sure her teeth were baring and her fists turning white from the force with which she clenched them; all ladylike airs and courtesies that had been drilled into her brain from a young age were suddenly absent. 

Armitage did not even budge when Ren lightly elbowed him, signalling for him to answer. 

Eyes still locked with her own, he spoke in a monotone accent, "Charmed." 

That received only a patronising glare from Ren, finally drawing Armitage's eyes away from Kit to match his displeasure. Seeming to give in, Armitage returned his attentions to Kit to give a tight lipped smile that almost appeared to pain him. It was gone in an instant, and Armitage took that opportunity to take a small canapé by the table beside them. 

At last she was free of his searing gaze. 

"I apologise for my friend, he is a man of few words."

Canady snorted, appearing to agree with the sentiment.

Kit faked a smile at Ren's words, but unlike Armitage, hers at least appeared genuine. "Oh, that is quite alright. We cannot all be masters of the English language. His talents must lie elsewhere." Kit had a devilish thought. "Say," now directing her speech to Armitage, "how are your skills on horseback, General?"

He paused, now turning his attention fully to her. "Perfectly adequate, Miss Vara." He emphasised her last name. "Though I confess I excel more in the sport of swimming. Do you partake?" 

He had her there. Now both with their mutual acknowledgement of their first meeting, the playing field was level. It was anyone's game. 

"Come now, General - this is a ball, for dancing! Sporting talk can wait for the smoking room," Canady butted in, while pushing Kit closer to the two men. The distance between her and the military officials walked the border of impropriety; with Armitage immediately taking notice and stepping back a pace. Ren however, stayed.

Through tightly clenched teeth, Armitage muttered out a series of words that sounded as if he were being held at gunpoint. "Miss Vara, may I request your company for the next dance?" 

Now this was unexpected. He obviously did not want to dance, so refusing him would give him what he wished. However, refusing him would also provide him an even greater dissatisfaction than accepting him - and possibly even bruise his overly inflated ego in the process. Her mind was made up. 

Without second thought to his rank and status and all the power that likely afforded him, Kit tilted her head to the side in false sadness, conjuring a pitying tone. "I am so sorry General, but I am just not in the mood."

He was speechless. Obviously having never been refused anything - let alone the company of a woman - this produced upon his features a genuine expression of shock. 

His partner seemed to delight in the exchange, attempting to mask a grin that threatened to surface. It was when the ginger-haired man made no reply that Ren sought his chance. 

"And if I asked you - would you make an exception?" 

This truly caught her off guard. Never had anyone purposely sought her attentions. She was sure it was out of respect for her family's circumstances, or simply to spite Armitage. Yet it sparked something within her; she craved more of it. 

Looking up at the dark haired man - for he now stood so close that he towered over her small stature - Kit was startled to see that he was grinning at her. A genuine, warmth-filled smile that suited his features. She could not help but reciprocate. 

"Why, of course," she replied, delighted by the expression it elicited on Ren. Eyes crinkling as she took his offered hand. 

She did not bother to spare a glance at Armitage as they strutted onto the dancefloor, though she could imagine him still stuck to his place and left to fester in his anger. The added punishment of being left with a drunken Canady for company was the cherry on top.

Still running on the adrenaline high from her exchange, Kit was practically floating as Ren led her deeper into the throng of couples, barely sparing a thought for what she had just done. To refuse such a powerful man was foolish, and to spite him by dancing with his superior was madness. It was only now that she truly realised who she had agreed to dance with; Kylo Ren, commander of the First Order Army - second in power only to King Snoke. He had been the architect of countless military operations, and had a reputation as a relentless and ambitious leader. The blood of thousands were upon his hands. 

Yet those same hands felt so gentle. Grasping Kit's fingers, he manoeuvred them so that they were in the proper position for dancing. His touch was feather-light, yet so enticingly warm that Kit lamented their loss at the first spin of the dance. His movements were efficient and calculated, but seemed graceful and leisurely due to his size. And throughout it all, he kept a hand pressed to her waist - drawing her nearer at the cessation of the twirl. 

"I must say, I admire your bravery," he spoke lowly into her ear. The warm breath lingered on her neck, drawing her out of her mental spiral.

"Upon reflection, I feel it was foolishness," Kit replied, keeping her gaze downward.

He hummed. "Foolish or not, it was entertaining. Look at him, he's practically seething. I don't know how you did it." 

Kit raised her head over Ren's shoulder briefly, daring a glance in Hux's direction. She was met not with the indifferent gaze of before, but one of anger. His eyes followed their movements with resentment, completely ignoring the intoxicated Canady that was still attempting to uphold conversation. 

"And as he denied the opportunity to, I will take it; I wanted to give my condolences to your family over the loss of your father. He was a capable and just Colonel. His presence has been sorely missed."

Kit was quite taken aback at his words - the formality of them. Nevertheless, she appreciated the sentiment. Why Hux would not do the same, she did not wish to know. 

"Thank you, Commander, for your kind words. It is a pity that your General did not feel as apologetic." She returned her attentions to him, as he continued to guide her through the steps of the dance.

"I take it that you overheard his remarks?"

"I was hard not to. He said I could not 'handle the realities of war'. And a 'spinster' he called me. I may not be married, but I am not that old..." Her words trailed off towards the end, surprised by the effect the insults had on her. 

"Then who are you, really?" The question was simple enough. So Kit gave a simple answer. 

"Well, I am Katherine Vara, eldest daughter of Otto Vara. I am a governess, and currently twen-" her words were cut off by a low chuckle. She was so close to his body that she could feel the movements echoing off his chest. 

"No, no. Who are you? What do you most desire from your life?"

Now those were hard hitting questions. Certainly not something one would discuss on a first meeting, and certainly not something a young lady would share with the Commander of the First Order Army. But in this moment, he was simply a man asking a woman about herself - something no one had ever taken the time to do. Consequently, she had never given it much thought. 

Who was she?

Instinctively, Kit spoke. "Adventure. I want... adventure. I want to escape Arkanis and see the world. I do not crave power or influence, just something different from my ordinary existence."

That answer seemed to puzzle him, judging by the way he moved back to catch her gaze. His large brown eyes left her breath caught in her throat, so warm and inviting. In that moment he displayed such a tender softness, uncharacteristic of a military commander. 

"You are full of surprises, Miss Vara." 

Emboldened by their shared moment of understanding, she swayed with the music before replying, "Everybody calls me Kit."

He grinned at that. "Kit, huh? Most would consider it improper of me to call you by anything other than your given name."

She blushed lightly. "I think I threw impropriety out the door by refusing Armitage."

"Armitage?" he laughed at the use of the General's first name.

"General Hux, I mean," she responded hastily. 

He seemed to delight in her panic. "Do not fret. Call him what you like when you're with me. I settle on Hux. Though he hates it when we call him Armie." Another low chuckle. 

"I shall keep that in mind, lest I require any further scathing remarks."

"Ah, she is viscous."

"Only when provoked," Kit replied slyly.

She could not see his face in that moment, but she swore she could hear the slight exhale of air that signalled his surprised amusement. 

As they continued to speak, the music finally reached its end, signalling the conclusion of that dance. 

"It seems our time together has ended, Kit."

"Yes. I imagine you have many items that require your attention, Commander. This ball must be impeding on such matters." 

He huffed at that. "They can wait one night. But for now, I must return you to Canady before Hux relinquishes the contents of that glass over his head." 

Kit giggled. 

Reluctantly, the pair made their way over to Canady and the General - only to be met by the replacement of Canady with her cousin. 

"Ah, Ren," then a shielded glare at Kit, "Miss Vara. How nice of you to join us. The Colonel and I were discussing his newfound relations."

"Oh? Is there a brother you have not told us of, Mitaka?" Ren jested. 

"No, actually," Hux gave a saccharine smile, "our very own Miss Vara appears to be his cousin."

Kit did not know what game Hux was playing at, yet she sensed it was a form of payback. 

"Yes, we met formally this evening. And I can already assure you that my cousin is a fierce conversation partner - and a reportedly competent pianoforte player," boasted Mitaka politely - none the wiser to events that had recently transpired. 

"Well, that settles it, you shall invite your cousins, Colonel," Hux directed to Mitaka in a scheming tone. 

"Pardon me for asking, but to what exactly am I being invited?" Kit tried to make her words sound as polite as possible. 

"Oh, there is to be a dinner party held for some of the higher-ups. The General, Commander Ren and Canady are attending - and now you and your sisters, too," Mitaka replied enthusiastically, offering Kit a sweet smile to what he thought was a pleasant offer. 

"Are you quite sure? I would not want to intrude." Kit tried to talk her way out of it. The thought of her family running wild with the higher-ups present brought dread into her mind. Canady would be drowning in his bottles, while Dany spoke too fast and too loudly to anybody that would listen - and Jayne would likely be found making advances towards an unsuspecting officer. She could not allow it.

"It would not be an intrusion at all - we should all be glad to have you," commented Ren. That settled it. As the highest ranking among them, she could not argue with his demands. 

Now, resigned to her fate, Kit could only grin and bear it. 

"I look forward to it immensely," she lied sweetly, nodding as she dismissed herself. Thinking she had the last word, she left to find her sisters to tell them of the news. 

Yet over her shoulder she heard Armitage speak.

"As do I."

Notes:

Who's ready for the dinner party????!

Chapter 6: Duet

Summary:

Kit drops some sick beats

"So Commander, how fares the war?"

The scrape of cutlery echoed throughout the finery of Colonel House, broken up by raucous laughter and chatter coming from the military men. As one of the only few women seated, Kit felt oddly intimidated and thought it best if she remained quiet unless spoken to. Her sister seemed to have other ideas. 

"As well as any war can, Mrs Canady." Ren's reply was cool and gave nothing away. He continued to eat his venison, thinking he had ended that line of conversation.

"Oh, it is alright. We are all loyalists here." Dany could never take a hint.

Kit could hear Ren's light sigh from her position beside him. Placing his fork back to the table, he readied himself. "Well, the First Order is making great strides. We've located the position of several Resistance bases and identified their leaders. Last month, we uncovered several trade routes still being used by the rebels, and have since sent a regiment to cease their occupation. Hux and I are due any day now to meet with King Snoke to discuss the next movement of our troops, though I believe most regiments will be stationed north as the attacks increase towards Hothcester." He took a sip of his wine, then added,  "It is only a matter of time before we put an end to this civil war." 

Ren's long exposition seemed to satisfy Dany, as she found herself nodding along and resuming her meal quietly. Canady looked none the wiser - too busy discussing something with an older bearded gentleman sat to his right. She noticed Jayne's attention was taken by a young cavalryman, likely dressed in all the finery he owned in an attempt at securing a mate. Mission accomplished it would seem. 

"Cousin, you have barely touched your food. It is divine - I promise you," whispered Mitaka from her right. Stabbing a piece with his fork, he held it up in show, before biting it clean off. "What excellent boiled potatoes."

"You seem quite the connoisseur," responded Kit with a grin. Some of her first words of the night. 

"And you seem quite shy this evening, Kit. Have we made such a poor impression already?" he asked half jokingly, yet it held enough truth that Kit had to pause to think on her answer. 

The poor impression in question presently sat directly across from her. Though currently engaged in polite conversation with some of his men,  she could feel Hux's eyes on her every now and then. He was undoubtedly listening in on her conversation - delighting in the way her spirit had been subdued tonight by the presence of over fifty military men. He had not made a poor impression initially - in fact, she found him quite charming that night he had pulled her from the lake. But every interaction with him since had been less than favourable. 

"It is just an odd feeling, to be back here - that is all," she decided on. It wasn't a complete lie, for it did feel surreal entering her childhood home now redecorated and lit for a feast. Her father was never one for extensive fraternising, so occasions like this were foreign to her. And though the estate now belonged to Mitaka - who was also technically the host of this dinner party - the presence of Ren and Hux served as a reminder that it was merely given out as an indication of rank and could just as easily be taken away. 

Her cousin seemed to feel a sense of unease in her words, and left it at that. Moreover, he had been recruited by Jayne into conversation along with the cavalryman, turning his attention to them now. It did not escape Kit's notice the way in which Mitaka stumbled over his words when talking to Jayne, or the way his eyes lingered too long on her face. It was no surprise - she seemed to have that effect on men.  

Someone else seemed to have noticed that interaction too. From her left, she felt Ren's body shift closer towards her before he was speaking in her ear. "It seems your sister has charmed the Colonel."

"He's been enamoured with her since she laughed at his opera espionage story. I do not think it was a difficult task," Kit snickered, hoping the people in question could not hear. 

Speaking into his wine glass, Ren added, "I'm sure she will make a beautiful bride."

Kit made a face of disgust, watching the pair in question exchange smiles and laugh with one another. "Do not make me think of such a thing. She is my baby sister."

Delighting in her reaction, Ren grinned widely and let out an airy chuckle. Hux gave them a questioning look over his plate which Kit chose to ignore. It was a delightful sound, she thought. Ren seemed totally relaxed and at ease enough to be joking around. How she wished she could feel that way, yet Kit surmised that it all came naturally to him as a result of the power he possessed. One word from him and anyone in that room could be taken away at a moments notice. The thought was oddly thrilling. 

She wondered if she asked nicely enough whether he would remove Hux from all further engagements and banish him across the sea. She did not quite know enough about their relationship with each other to determine if he would be willing, yet Kit could sense a sort of rivalry between the two men that told her the idea wasn't completely out of the question. Though she could not exactly ask such a favour just yet, so she settled on something more mundane. 

"Commander, I have been meaning to ask, but why is my family seated so high up on the table? I would have thought we would be down by the officers." Kit finally began to eat her meal. 

"I may have had some say in the seating chart," he grinned. 

"Ah, so that is how Mitaka found himself with Jayne." Kit thought herself clever for uncovering that plot.

"Or, Kit, it is how you found yourself with me." 

He said it so nonchalantly, but Kit found herself speechless and with a deepening blush spreading across her nose. From across the table, Hux seemed to choke on his drink for an unknown reason. 

"Oh."

"Is that a good 'oh' - or have I overstepped?"

"No! No - I am just surprised. I would not expect anyone to go out of their way to be seated near me, let alone the Commander of the army." She was back to playing with her food. 

"Hm. Well that is a surprise. For I think that all these men should be tripping over one another to be in your presence. There's just something intriguing about you that I can't quite place." His words were spoken softly in between bites of his dinner. To any onlookers, the conversation appeared trivial and mundane. But the reality was so far from it. 

Kit genuinely did not know what to do. A powerful, intimidating man was all but proclaiming his interest in her, and she could not understand why. If she were to refuse him, what would be the consequences? Banishment? Imprisonment? Then Kit realised that she had no intention of refusing his advances - for she secretly relished in his praise. Having been so starved of attention and care from a young age, anything even remotely flattering threw her heart for a loop. 

And now it was on fire. 

Her question of how to respond was answered when she felt Ren shift beside her. From the corner of her eye, she watched as he removed his hand from the table and sat it across his knee. A few moments passed, then he was inching it closer to Kit. Her own hand rested presently in her lap, and her breathing quickened as Ren's hand found hers. Large and veiny, his engulfed her own - intertwining their fingers and sitting hidden underneath the tablecloth. She remembered to the night of the ball where she had felt that warmth as they danced, but now it had meaning behind it. He absentmindedly grazed his thumb over her knuckles and she responded with a light squeeze. He grinned down at the table. 

"I beg your pardon?" came a cutting voice that threw the pair from their moment. 

"We were just wondering, General, what happened to your hand - no offence intended." Canady's words were slightly slurred and his tone had taken on an airy carelessness so out of character for the Lord. 

"Ah. Well I am not so sure you would find the tale quite as amusing as I do," Hux responded, wiping his mouth with the serviette before looking straight at Kit. She felt a bolt of fear shoot through her, and involuntarily tightened her grip on Ren. 

"Oh do tell! We are all ears," Dany inserted herself into the conversation. 

He was unwavering in his gaze, taking time to contemplate his answer but never leaving Kit's face. It was almost as if he were threatening her. For he truly did hold a certain power over her; his part in that night would be of little note, for he was a man and it was acceptable for him to be out past dark and alone. But for Kit to be implicated in such a scenario was scandalous. A life ruining sort of scandalous.

Still resolute in her unwillingness to see Hux succeed, she looked away and held her head high. If he wanted to ruin her, let him try. It would at least add some excitement into her mundane life.

But oddly enough, the General did no such thing. Sighing to himself and holding his now properly bandaged hand for all to see, he gave a short and sharp explanation. "I simply fell from my horse when I directed it into a rocky patch of moorland. During which, I cut my hand and had nought but my shirt to bandage it. It was certainly an interesting arrival to Arkanis."

He had lied. And very well, too. His face betrayed no falsehoods and he said the words so confidently that she nearly believed him - had she not been there for the actual event. 

But why was he doing this? Was he prolonging his hold over her - just waiting for the opportune moment to humiliate her? Maybe he would wait for her dalliance with Ren to take off, then confide in him the truth and bring it all crashing down. And all of this, simply because she refused to dance with him.

"It appears your horsemanship needs work," added Ren snidely. 

"Yes, maybe. But it is made impossible when there are certain obstacles in your path," the General replied. Another glance to Kit, this time lingering for only a second.

Ren only snickered and then turned his attention away from Hux. 

The rest of the meal was eaten in relative silence, yet Ren kept his comforting hold of Kit throughout.

---

"Oh, please! You must. Officer William said it's one of his favourites."

"Then officer William is welcome to play it." 

"But he can't - he doesn't know how."

"Then you play it."

"Kit, I am doing everyone a favour by not."

"That is true... I still refuse."

Jayne let out a whinging sigh and slumped back into the flowery lounge. Most of the dinner party had retired to the drawing room, while some of the officers had elected to visit the smoking room instead. Jayne was currently set on having Kit play the pianoforte for the guests - featuring a preferred song from one the young cavalryman she had met over dinner. Her plan was to entice him with her singing, and even Kit could admit that her sister was quite talented in that aspect. 

"You will not even have to sing, Kit! All the attention will be on me and you can just treat it as though you're playing for Vivienne."

"Yes, but Vivienne is my student and these are the highest ranking military men in the country. I think there is a distinction to be made. It is a duet, anyway - I doubt any of the other ladies know the piece."

"So if I can find you a partner you will play?"

"Certainly. Because I know you will not."

"We shall see," Jayne said devilishly. 

Kit returned to observing the card game Dany and her husband were playing, sloppily placing cards atop each other in a poor imitation of bridge. At least they were out of action for the remainder of the night. Though it appeared Jayne was only just getting started.

Strategically, she had manoeuvred herself to the centre of the room, taking her glass with her. She gave three polite taps to its side, the sound echoing across the room and causing the conversation to dim. 

"Apologies for the interruption, but does anybody know the duet accompaniment for Lilies of the Valley in C-sharp Minor? We require a second player for the next song."

Almost immediately, cousin Mitaka made himself known. Excellent - he would at least be a pleasant partner. "I unfortunately do not play, but I know someone who does - he even played the very piece in question at the last Christmas ball." Mitaka seemed quite pleased with himself for that contribution. 

"Who, cousin?" Jayne questioned excitedly. 

"Why, our very own General."

Immediately, all eyes turned to the red-haired man seated by the corner and engrossed in a novel of some sort. Sensing the eyes on him, he looked up and quirked a brow. "Are the rebels attacking already?" 

"Oh no, General - far worse. You've been recruited to perform."

"I'd hardly call that worse, Colonel. Pianoforte at least requires some skill. Now, what am I playing?" He seemed to have no objection to being asked to perform, and leisurely crossed the room to take a seat by the instrument. Upon hearing the name of the piece and recognising it to be a duet, he directed a question to the onlookers. "And who is to be my accomplice?"

Wordlessly, Jayne grabbed Kit's arm and pulled her from the lounge, directing her to the seat of the pianoforte. "Kit will. And I shall sing."

Jayne had been correct in stating that all eyes would be on her, for if they had not, all of the audience might have noticed the shocked look on both musicians' faces. They might also have noticed the way Kit slowly sat down beside him on the stool, scooting as far over as possible until her thigh was spilling over the side. 

Trying not to look at him, she could not help herself from catching a glance of his bandaged hand. 

"You are healed enough to play?" she whispered, almost sounding concerned. 

"Yes. Someone suggested I see a proper doctor to prevent scarring." He looked to her only slightly, but she caught the amused expression on his face. 

"That was smart of them."

"Hm, we shall see about that. Let's play." 

Raising that injured hand, Hux pressed out the first few notes that signalled the beginning of the piece. Long and lithe, and in complete contrast to the sturdy thickness of Ren's, Hux's digits danced swiftly across the keys with a mind of their own. He had quite a flair in his playing style; accentuating the depth of the low notes with the arch of his hands and moving fluidly from one side of the keys to the other. 

As they played, Jayne began the vocal accompaniment to the piece and the drawing room audience grew in number. Officers smoking cigars lined the back wall of the room, while seated onlookers ceased their card games and conversations to focus on the young songbird. Mitaka was completely beguiled by her, sitting on the edge of his seat with his eyes round as saucers. It was quite an endearing sight.

Kit was pleasantly surprised at the General's abilities, and conceded that they were equal if not superior to her own. She wondered who had taught him this - for she doubted it was covered in military training school. Regardless, he was evidently a natural and she relished in the combined sounds of each of their playing. 

By now, Jayne's singing had all but faded to the background of Kit's mind, as she allowed herself to be enraptured by the music alone. The piece told a melodic story; beginning with short, light notes before delving into the dulcet depths of the lower register. Consequently, Kit found herself moving down the keys into the General's territory - as was required by the music. 

The final few bars were approaching, and Jayne's vocal performance was about to reach its searing climax. With a deep breath, her sister let out the final lengthened note, holding it for emphasis. 

The ending of the piece required only a single middle key. Yet as Kit moved to press it, her hand was enveloped by his - pushing down on the ivory simultaneously. 

Almost immediately their hands were ripped away, yet she felt the lingering heat in the moments following. 

That was not supposed to happen; only one player was intended to play the note.

The audience was applauding now and Jayne was accepting her praises, yet the two players could only focus on each other. Seemingly exhausted from their performance, both were breathing heavily - yet no words passed between them. 

Clutching his bandaged hand as if once more injured, Hux unknowingly flexed it in his grip. Kit rested hers neatly on her lap. She must have hurt his injured hand - that was it. 

Now he would not meet her eyes. 

She considered saying something, apologising even, yet she did not have the chance. Standing from the rectangular stool, Hux circled on the pianoforte and nodded quickly at Kit in a quick bow. 

"Miss Vara - goodnight."

Before she could even respond the same, he was gone. Out the door and into the entryway, she watched his figure depart the dinner party as the applause died down. 

What an odd man.

Chapter 7: A Sign

Dear Kitty,

You do not mind me calling you that, do you? I shall hope not, for I find the name quite endearing. I write to you as I wished to convey my apologies for leaving the dinner party so early. Due to your being there, I was fully intent on staying until the conclusion of the night, yet I was called away on urgent military business shortly after dinner. 

From what I have heard, you and your sister gave the officers quite the show. Several have since conveyed to me how eloquently you played, and expressed their appreciation for your sister's singing voice and pretty face. (I hope she will not be too encumbered with proposals before the season's end). 

It was also mentioned that the General, of all people, played as your accomplice. You may be able to sense my surprise at such events - and I am all too regretful that I missed it. 

I can picture it now; the steam practically billowing out his ears as he played along. What a sight! I hope that you were not scorched by the flames prickling his head. And I do apologise on his behalf for any rude behaviour, though I think he has been vexed ever since you refused him at the ball. Hux seems to have taken it quite personally -  yet it is entirely the reason you caught my eye. 

I wonder, Kitty, if you would allow me to write to you while I am stationed? I cannot promise a traditional courtship given the volatile nature of my position, though I do hope I have made my intentions towards you clear. I shall hope that given our flirtation the other evening, you are inclined to feel the same way. Though I must encourage discretion; First Order officials have stringent procedures regarding courtships, and I do not wish to expose you to any scrutiny without you being decided upon me. 

I know it is not proper to begin an attachment through writing, yet my feelings towards you could not wait until our next chance meeting to be expressed. Please know that I am thinking of you often and eagerly await the opportunity to kiss your hand and look upon your lovely smile. 

While I am forbidden from revealing our current position, please send any letters you wish to the Army Office and I shall receive them in due time. 

 

Yours,

Commander Ren. 

 

Kit re-read the letter for the hundredth time that morning. Clutched tightly in her hands, the words were as valuable to her as spun gold. 

While she had already written out her eager reply within the hour, she could not get his words to leave her mind. 

Things like this did not happen to her. She did not have romances - let alone secretive romantic correspondence with an army commander. And a courtship. She felt giddy at just the thought of it. As though she were some blushing debutante prone to spells of fainting.

Once Dany had married, Kit had quite resigned herself to a life of spinsterhood. So begrudgingly content with such a situation, she had nearly purchased a tabby kitten, yet prevented herself from doing so only on account of Canady's prohibition. That was to be the reality of her life. 

Until today, that is. 

What it was Ren saw in her, she could not say. There were at least a hundred other women younger and more beautiful than her that should have caught his attention. Even her own sister, for a start. Yet he chose her. And not only that, but he openly danced with her in front of all of Arkanis. 

It was clear to her that he was not ashamed to be seen with her. Though they would have to maintain a level of secrecy, he did not try to hide his interactions with her at the ball. And from the moment they met, he spoke to her as if there were no one else in the room except the two of them.

Kit took a deep breath to calm herself, trying her absolute hardest to make no expression. Realistically, this would not last. He would realise that she was just a plain and boring woman with no wifely attributes and move on to the next contender. 

The thought saddened her, yet it brought an odd sense of comfort knowing that she would not have to go through the terrifying ordeal of making her own attachment known to the wider world. Even the mention of intimacy brought a flush to her cheeks, so to have her sisters know that she actually had desires – and was not just a virtuous, pious girl – made her physically ill. 

“Miss? Miss!”

She was ripped away from her spiralling thoughts. “Yes, Vivienne?”

“I asked if we were done with sketching for the morning. I tire of staring at this bowl of fruit,” the young girl whined as she slouched on her stool. 

Kit shoved the letter away into the pockets of her dress, trying to forget about its contents for just a moment. She was supposed to be working. 

“Well, while the apples are well drawn, your light source appears to be coming from more than one direction. The oranges are good, however. But there is always room for improvement, Viv. Let’s do another – really refine your skills.”  

The young girl remained unmoving, merely rolling her eyes at the governess. Their lessons usually followed this pattern, rendering it near difficult for Kit to make any progress in her education. She reminded Kit of Jayne, though at least Vivienne was not out in society yet and still had some decency. 

“But I do not care for drawing – I want to visit town! The soldiers are here! Oh, please just let me go. They are so handsome in their coats…” The young girl stared wistfully out the window, almost as if she could see the soldiers now. 

“They still have quite some time before they return to the field, and you will surely see them then. For now, we draw.”

And that was that. Yet not even ten minutes of their silent sketching had passed before Dany came bursting into the room.

“Oh sister! Our cousin has called!” 

Kit would never have peace in this house. 

“Has he now? Did he come looking for Jayne?” She smirked down at her sketch.

“And you. He invites us on a countryside stroll. I would go, yet Vivienne and I have an appointment with the seamstress. He is waiting in the parlour as we speak.”

“Surely we can reschedule it – I was just telling Aunty how I so wished to visit town.” Vivienne was now out of her seat, batting her eyelashes and pouting at Dany in an attempt to persuade her. 

“No, no I will not hear it. I have had this appointment scheduled for over a month and I shall not relinquish it. You require a new gown for your birthday, and I need a new bonnet made up to complement my new gloves. We cannot just put these types of things off.”

Though it sounded to Kit exactly like something that could easily be put off, she did not argue and silently thanked her sister for a break from Vivienne. While she liked the girl, it was exhausting trying to teach someone who so obviously did not wish to learn. 

“Well, if that is the case then I had best ready myself. We will resume our lessons tomorrow, Viv.”

---

“Ah, there you are. I do hope I was not interrupting?” Her cousin stood at the bottom of the staircase, already with Jayne on his arm. Her light curls brushed his shoulder slightly, though he did not seem to mind one bit. They made a handsome couple.

“Quite the contrary. You are my saviour – I would still be drawing an assortment of old fruit were it not for the interruption.” Kit re-adjusted her bonnet. 

“That poor girl, I cannot imagine anything more ghastly,” added Jayne. Kit just threw her a look and continued down to meet them. 

“Slowly but surely, she is making progress. Slowly being the key word in that statement.” 

Mitaka grinned at her remark, too polite to offer a laugh. 

“Well then, shall we?” He motioned to the door, and the trio left Canady Hall for the town. 

Passing through the moorland, Kit observed as the sedges morphed into white flowers atop grassy hills. It was a gentler landscape the closer they got to the town, though the walk was only short. 

The pair stayed linked at the arm, quite content to talk amongst themselves while Kit trailed behind. She did not mind it, for she had a lot to think on herself. 

Her reply, for one. Though she had written it hours ago, Kit was still second guessing every line she had put to paper. Her bedroom had looked like an author’s study with the amount of discarded paper and spilt ink that littered her desk. It was a wonder she even formed a coherent statement. 

Presently, the small envelope was burning a hole in her pocket, and she could not help but to fidget with it as she strolled along. The thought of Ren receiving her letter brought the pink to her cheeks, wondering if he would react similarly to how she did upon reading his. What if he did not reply?

She shook the thought from her mind and focused on the cobblestones beneath her. They had entered into the town now.

 “So, Kit, how are you finding the men of the First Order?” Mitaka asked over his shoulder.

“Well, cousin, you were certainly a surprise. We had thought you to be old and pompous – yet we come to find that you are young.” She grinned to herself, hoping that the teasing had flown over his head. 

He hesitated a moment, reflecting on the words - then could not contain his chuckle upon the realisation. 

“Cousin, you jest. But what I really meant was, have any of the men taken your fancy?”

Before she could nonchalantly deny attraction towards any of his men, Jayne decided to have her say. “I think I know who has. I saw them speaking at the ball.” She paused for emphasis, wanting to see Kit sweat. 

“Oh, do tell,” replied Mitaka with a hint of mischief.

This was it. Jayne must have overheard their conversation or seen their interaction at dinner. So much for maintaining a level of secrecy. 

“Yes, they were awfully close at the dinner party. Practically sitting on top of each other.” Jayne chuckled devilishly to herself, and Kit could feel her heart beating out of her chest. She must have seen their hand holding under the table. She knew of their impropriety. 

“I-,” began Kit – yet she was unable to say anything more that would not make the situation worse.

“You must have seen it, cousin. They played so passionately together after dinner – both sitting on the same seat. You cannot deny it.”

Wait. She thought that Hux had caught her attention? Jayne could not be further from the truth. The idea made her laugh involuntarily, with all previous fear gone. Her sister was not the brightest. 

“Let me get this straight, you believe that General Hux – who has been nothing but cold to me since his arrival – has caught my attention?” Kit questioned incredulously. 

“Do not say it like that – I know what I saw!” Jayne replied, half offended.

“What you saw, sister, was both of us trying not to kill the other. Even his presence is enough to vex me at this point.”

Her sister seemed dumbfounded at this while her cousin seemed to delight in the exchange. One of the perks of growing up without sisters. 

“So, I shall take that as a no, then?” Mitaka broke the silence. 

“Yes you shall,” Kit stated pointedly while she walked ahead of them into the town square.

Though she pretended to busy herself with looking into store windows, she could not shake the accusations from her mind. Her and Hux? Not even if he were the last man alive. 

In almost every interaction they’d had bar their first unofficial meeting, he had been rude and condescending. In every other, he had been awkward and unwilling to speak. 

She wondered if he had a wife and almost pitied her – though the woman that accepts him would only have herself to blame for having such poor taste. As a father, she imagined he would be absent at best, though she could not deny any offspring of his would likely be gifted with his pleasant hair colour and musical abilities. Such would be little consolation for having the General as a father, however. 

The smell of fresh bread lingered throughout the streets, and she was almost compelled to go into the bakery - until she remembered the post office next door. She had a letter to post. 

Yelling back to her family members - presently engaged in a whispering match - she informed them that she would not be a second. They need not follow her in, lest they see the addressee of her letter. 

The old wooden building was larger on the inside than it appeared from its exterior, with countless pigeonholes filled with letters, parcels and an assortment of other goods. Walking to the counter, Kit took a small coin from her purse and placed it on the tabletop. 

“Will this cover postage?” she inquired.

The gentleman behind the counter stroked his moustache and looked at her. “Depends where you’re posting.”

“Well, I’m not entirely sure where the location is, but I think-,” before Kit could finish, the bell hung above the door rang out, signalling the entrance of another individual. She did not pay them any mind, wishing to post this letter as soon as possible. She resumed, “I think it is somewhere near Coruscant. It is the First Order Army Office.” 

The newcomer walked to stand in line behind her.

“Then that’ll cover it.” The postman took the money from table and held out his hand for her letter. Placing the small envelope into his grasp, she felt a weight lifted from her shoulders. All she had to do now was wait. 

“Thank you, good day.” Keeping her head down, she had just about made her way to the front of the store before she heard the next customer speak.

“Mail for the First Order Army Office, please.” 

She knew that voice. The clipped accent and his direct way of speaking. 

Only when she turned away from the door were her suspicions confirmed. 

His back was to her, yet he still cut a striking figure. While tremendously tall and dressed in all black, it was his fiery hair that gave him away. He must not have noticed her on account of her bonnet, for surely he would have made himself known. 

Kit could not chance him recognising her, yet watched silently as he was handed a small pile of ornate letters and thanked the older man. And from the green wax seal that she so commonly used, Kit could recognise her letter placed neatly on the very top of the pile. She did not wait to see Hux’s reaction – the thought was too much. 

Bursting through the doors, Kit was practically hyperventilating. Even if Hux did not read it, surely someone else would. Or they’d at least see who she was writing to. The gossip would spread like wildfire, and any affection Ren did once hold for her would dissipate almost immediately upon hearing their names tossed about so erroneously. What was she even thinking - agreeing to continue their attachment. 

Nearly running down the length of the Arkanis centre, Kit only stopped to catch her breath when she reached the gates of the church. Her sister and cousin sat within those gardens, unaware of her crisis.  

Looking back the way she came, all Kit could see were the bland figures of the Arkanis inhabitants, going about their boring lives with their boring families in their boring little town. She was finished with Arkanis; Kit needed to escape – permanently this time. 

Today had just been a tipping point. Silently, she prayed for a sign. Anything, to get her out of the place she had come to resent. The wind picked up, fluttering her hair loose from its bun. But then she heard the sound of paper billowing in the wind beside her.

Opening her eyes, she was greeted with a poster nailed to the fencepost of the church. Without care for who saw, she ripped it from its position and read with eager eyes.

 

ATTENTION

NURSES NEEDED FOR FIRST ORDER ARMY 

JOIN TODAY AND SERVE

MODEST WAGE, LODGINGS AND FOOD PROVIDED

ENQUIRE WITHIN

 

She grinned and her mind went quiet. No message had ever been clearer, and her thoughts had never been more at ease. Trudging through the entry of the gardens, she made a beeline for the open doors of the church. She passed Jayne and Mitaka on the way.

“Off to say some prayers, Kit?”

“No cousin, I am joining the army.”

 

Notes:

Shoutout to the commenter who guessed it! Kit is gonna be a nurse! Now we can get into Act 2 and see how Kit will survive now that she's free of her family. Stay tuned for more!

Chapter 8: New Beginnings

Summary:

Kit begins her new life as an army nurse.

"Name?"

"Vara."

The officer paused and looked up. From the creases on his brow, she could tell his age - possibly why he was stationed in the marshalling tent rather than on the field. Though his eyes seemed to scrutinise her, it was not in a negative way; looking for confirmation of something rather than judging. "Hm," he mused, before looking back down and flicking through the list of names. Tracing down the the last page of the register, he stopped and held his pen in place. "Katherine?" he questioned across the top of his glasses.  

"The very same." She tried a smile, but it came across awkwardly. Maybe he served under her father? She did not wish to mention it, in case it would appear like she was pulling rank. 

Ignoring her, the man lifted a large package over the table and placed it in front of both of them. She took in its size and her reality suddenly dawned on her. 

"You will be allocated three uniform sets, a coat and one pair of shoes. Should you require any replacements, it is up to you to contact your head nurse and organise payment. Speaking of which, you will be paid a modest wage, to be determined upon your completion of one month in the field. Are we clear?"

"Yes..." He raised a brow. "Sir?" she tried. 

That satisfied him. "You will be rooming in the nurses' tent, which is number 5. It's towards the back of the camp, by the mess tent. Choose a bed, then you are due for orientation at noon. Dismissed."

It appeared he had nothing else to say, so Kit took her uniform parcel in one arm and her suitcase in the other before exiting the marshalling tent. 

It had been several weeks since her great revelation, and Kit had been running on its adrenaline and her thoughts of Ren ever since. Even when bombarded with Canady's disapproval and Dany's wailing, she had held strong in her determination that this was what she wanted. Jayne had initially presented her with a could not care attitude, though when the evening of her departure came, Kit was quite certain she saw her sister shed a tear before she joined Mitaka in the carriage that would take them to his regiment's camp. Vivienne, it would appear, was quite ecstatic at the loss of her governess - certain that this would mean the end of her lessons. 

The actual act of leaving had been quite simple, as she had few belongings and even fewer clothes. Her cotton day dresses and bonnets would do no good on the fields of Corellia, so she elected to only bring a small selection of her winter skirts and stockings, as well as the satchel of her father's whisky. From the depths of her closet, she had grasped the worn leather of her coat; now littered with creases from her night in the pond. Thinking back on that evening, she had giggled to herself at the absurdity of those events. Thankfully, she would not have to see Hux again. He had likely been stationed somewhere far from the 22nd regiment on important military business. But when she had reached further into the closet expecting to find her evening gown, she was met with the feel of rough woollen fabric. Kit had drawn the article from the depths, and was shocked at what she saw. 

In her grasp, she beheld Hux's greatcoat that he had draped over her after hers had soaked through. How she had forgotten to return it, Kit could not say. It had completely skipped her mind that she had not only held onto it that night, but sequestered it behind all other articles of clothing. If her sisters had found a man's coat in her possession, she would be in for some very unpleasant confrontation, in which there was no explanation that could prevent suspicion. She had thought to leave it behind or dispose of it - but then the item would still likely be found by Dany's maid or the butler. Giving the coat a closer inspection, Kit noticed several tears and fraying along the seams, and the cuffs appeared to be littered with holes from overuse. It seemed a well worn item, though she could not say if it were loved or simply neglected. 

So, that is how Kit found herself at present carrying the tattered greatcoat in her bag, wrapped around the satchel of her father's whisky and without the stress of either items being discovered by her family. What she planned to do with it, she could not say. Maybe she would claim she found it unattended in the mess tent, or even leave it there herself. Regardless, her plans could wait for later. 

As she trudged through the mud of the regiment campsite, Kit took a moment to relish in the feeling of freedom that now coursed through her. She no longer felt the pressure from Dany to keep her shoes free from mud, nor did she feel the stare of Jayne as she let the hem of her dress trail through the dirt. She was a member of the 22nd Regiment now - and they had more important matters to attend to. 

Finally coming to the back of the campsite, she noted a black '5' painted on a tent flap that belonged to a long, rectangular structure. She could hear light chatter from within, and ducked inside just as she noticed a set of dark clouds moving across the sun. 

The first thing Kit noticed upon entering was the warmth inside. She had become quite accustomed to the cold during her travels to Corellia, but now realised just how much she had missed the feel of the warmth's embrace. Small beds lined the walls of the structure, while the wooden beams holding it up were littered with oil lamps and hooks upon which various aprons and skirts were placed. A small chest of drawers sat at the end of each bed, where Kit supposed each lady was to keep her belongings. It seemed that the others had packed as lightly as she had, for there were no silk gowns or gloves to be seen. 

If she had expected to be bombarded with questioning looks or shunned as the new girl, she was sorely mistaken. There could not have been more than twenty beds in the dormitory, and at present there were not even six girls in the room. 

Her presence initially went unnoticed, allowing her to scout the room for an unoccupied bed. Finding one down the end, she made her way over and deposited her belongings on it before sitting atop. She gave the mattress a test and winced, finding that it had little give. So this was what her foreseeable future looked like. 

Kit wondered if Mitaka had to deal with the same lack of comfort, and made a mental note to ask once she finally found him again. Their journey up from Arkanis had been pleasant, though Kit did not stop teasing him about his fancy for Jayne. He had been very downcast upon having to leave her, though Kit still could not gauge Jayne's true feelings on the matter - still unsure if she was just toying him along as was her way. 

Just before their arrival, he had made it clear to Kit that while she was family, he could afford her no privileges at camp. She found no issue in the matter, preferring to be treated the same as any other nurse - though they agreed they would still share a familial meal or two if the chance permitted. Still, it was nice to know that she would have a friend there with her. 

Kit now set about the task of unpacking - an easy endeavour as she quickly transferred the contents of the suitcase into the drawers. She ensured that Hux's coat and the whisky were set at the bottom, covered by what remained of her belongings. The letter from Ren that had since lived in her dress pocket was now slid beneath as well, while Kit silently mourned its loss.

She had not yet received a letter in response to her own, though she had sent another to inform him of her changed situation. Kit wondered what Ren would think, though she doubted he would have any complaints - their correspondence would possibly be made simpler due to her stationing closer to Coruscant, where he likely was. This even opened up the chance of more in-person meetings, though they would need to find an excuse to speak with one another. Maybe she could pretend to have intercepted a top secret message that only the highest of officials should be privy to. They would think of something. 

Closing the trunk, it was now that she finally beheld her nurse's uniform. 

Removing it from the parcel and holding it up, the dress had a different silhouette to her usual attire; cinched in at the waist rather than under the bust, long sleeved and grey. Accompanying it was a white cap and apron, as well as a pair of black lace-up boots. Exactly as the officer had described. 

"They're more comfortable than they look." 

Turning to her right, Kit noticed that she now had a bed neighbour. The girl looked to be about Kit's age, with dark brown hair and an athletic build that was now dressed in a fresh uniform. What stood out most, though, was her beaming smile. 

"They'd ought to be - I didn't pack much else," Kit mused. That earned her an even wider smile from the girl. 

"I see we're to be neighbours. I'm Rey." She held out a hand in the way a gentleman would. 

Grasping it, Kit shook without a second thought. "Kit. Well, Katherine, but everyone calls me Kit." Everyone except a certain someone, she thought to herself, nearly blushing at the memory of the letter.

"Kit. What on earth made you want to stare at blood and bandage wounds all day?" 

She could see that her new friend was direct and to the point; it was a breath of fresh air. "Well I've never been squeamish around wounds, and I've bandaged a few arms here and there," she smiled to herself. "But I suppose the main reason I'm here is for some adventure - something different. I think I would have gone mad if I had to spend another second on Arkanis."

"Ah, that name rings a bell. It's a county of First Order loyalists, is it not?"

Kit chuckled. "You'd struggle to find someone who wasn't either a retired soldier, an army document maker or knitting socks for the officers. The First Order is all they - well, we - know."

Rey looked perplexed at Kit's response. "What an... interesting place." She said nothing more and appeared to be thinking something over. 

"And what made you join up?" Kit tried to keep the conversation going. 

Snapping out of it, Rey took on a gentle tone. "Well, when your parents abandon you at the orphanage, there's not too many options for young women. It was either this, or get married. This was obviously the preferable choice," she finished with a smirk. 

Kit liked her. Chuckling at her companion's dark humour, she felt more at ease in her new surrounds. She had mounted the first obstacle of many, and felt ready to take on whatever came her way.

"Come on, best get ready. It's nearly noon."

---

Newly dressed in her nursing uniform, Kit ran beside Rey in the direction of the medical tent. The brewing storm had finally made itself known, and was belting down on the camp with no end in sight. Rey had even picked up such speed that she slid several metres through the mud, only to be caught by Kit who then erupted into a fit of giggles just as they reached the entryway. 

They must have been the last to arrive, for all the others inside were dry and looking very proper in their unsullied uniforms. Coming to stand behind the first row of women, Kit noticed that most were quite older than she and Rey, though remembered all were of the same skill level or they would not be in attendance at orientation. 

Kit frantically attempted to smooth her hair over, but found that small ringlets had begun to form from the rain and frame her flushed cheeks. She probably looked a sight. 

Rey silently chuckled at Kit's attempts and swatted her hands down, before Kit finally gave in and tried not to dissolve into giggles again.

Just at that moment, she noticed the flap into the adjoining tent open, before Mitaka walked in. He was followed by a taller figure. Though she first mistook them for a man due to the cropped hairstyle, the individual was a woman - dressed in a white version of the nurse uniform. Her striking blonde hair and large stature seemed almost otherworldly to Kit, and she concluded that she had never seen such a goddess-like woman before. 

Mitaka now took his place before the small crowd, and Kit could see an obvious change in his countenance; this was Colonel Mitaka.

"Ladies, I welcome you to the 22nd Regiment of His Highness, King Snoke's, First Order Army. I am Colonel Dopheld Mitaka, leader of this Regiment. Beside me is your head nurse Phasma. She will be overseeing your training and work. Any questions, queries or quarrels are to be directed to her."

"He looks quite short from here," Rey whispered to Kit.

Trying her hardest to hide her smirk, Kit just shook her head. 

"Thank you, Colonel. I too wish to welcome you, fellow nurses. Though I also wish to extend a word of caution: the work we do is hard, grim and not for the faint of heart. If you are here for an easy wage or to find yourself an officer husband, then I suggest you find the next carriage to Coruscant instead."

"Won't be a problem," Kit now whispered to Rey. It earned a snicker, followed by a look from Mitaka. She gave a small wave upon his recognition of her, and she could see his resolve break for a millisecond. 

"That is all I have to say, as unfortunately duty calls and we are set to enter into combat within the week. But I shall leave you in the capable hands of nurse Phasma, who will begin your-" Mitaka's speech was cut short at the arrival of another officer. He was breathing heavily and grasped a piece of paper in his hands. The rain must have stopped, noticed Kit. 

"Apologies, Colonel. It can't wait," he wheezed, thrusting the paper into her cousin's hands. 

Mitaka was as baffled as the nursing recruits appeared to be, as he skimmed the contents of the letter. As he finished, his eyebrows rose and he automatically looked to Kit with a panicked expression for a split second - though it was unreadable if one had never met Mitaka. 

"And they are here - now?" Mitaka questioned the envoy.

"Yes. Said he wanted to speak with you. They're headed here this minute." That news seemed to stun her cousin, and he had to take a moment to recollect himself. Though before he could begin again, two more figures entered the tent. 

Kit could not believe her eyes. Rounding the corner to stand beside Mitaka were none other than Commander Ren and General Hux. The pair appeared taken aback that they had an audience, though they did not seem to notice Kit behind the row of nurses in front of her. 

"Nurses, I apologise - allow me to introduce two of our highest ranking officials, General Hux and Commander Ren." The former gave a short nod to the crowd, while Ren remained stoic and just looked upon the women. It was as if he was searching for something. And then he found it. 

Locking eyes with Kit, she could almost feel his pupils dilate. The sudden attention brought a bright pink to her already flushed cheeks, and she could not help but look away, trying to conceal her girlish smile. She could feel her heart thumping beneath her breast, and she silently hoped that Rey could not tell what effect the Commander's presence was having on her. 

So his letter had been sincere. 

When Ren made no attempt to address the recruits as was expected of the higher ranking member, Hux sighed and began a drawling address that seemed overly rehearsed. She blocked most of it out, too entranced by the way the Commander's eyes seemed to dance over her face - likely taking in her dishevelled appearance. 

"...and so on behalf of His Highness King Snoke, we wish to..." 

Now, Kit heard the room go silent. Snapping her gaze away from Ren, she looked to the speaker to see what had caused him to trail off. That may have been a mistake, for she came to find the General's eyes questioningly searching her own in such a stark contrast to the leisurely way that Ren had admired her. He for once did not appear angry - simply caught off guard. He quickly resumed his speech. 

"We want to thank you for your commitment to the First Order and wish you well during your time here." He visibly swallowed and then abruptly turned his attention to Mitaka to begin a hushed conversation. 

Phasma took that as her cue to take over. "Ladies, if you would follow me to the back of the infirmary, we shall begin your training, starting with changing bedpans." Sounds of disgust filtered through the women, while Phasma led them to the rear of the tent with a smirk. 

Kit turned to follow, being the last in the line of nurses. But before she could make a move, she felt the brush of a hand against the pulse point on her wrist. Hux and Mitaka were still occupied, so that could only leave one person. Looking up, she was met with the deep brown of Kylo Ren's eyes. As he passed her, he leaned down to speak. 

"I told you we'd meet again, Kitty." 

Ren dragged his finger up her arm until he finally broke contact to speak with the others, while Kit went to resume her training. 

Joining up had been the right decision. 

Notes:

Rey and Phasma have now entered the picture!
And now that Kit is out of proper society, she can hopefully indulge in some more *scandalous* behaviours heheh. Still gonna be a slow burn, but we might get some bare ankles in the near future.

Chapter 9: To Battle

War was not a foreign concept to Kit. For too many years as a child, she had spent her nights laying awake running through all the ways in which her father may be harmed while on the battlefield. Pierced by a bayonet, crushed by canon fire or hit by a bullet were among her most common scenarios. And with no parental figure there to comfort her - save for the occasional maid - it was up to Kit to and reassure herself that these were the realities of war and that it would be foolish to think otherwise. 

So when one of those scenarios came to fruition, Kit had been thoroughly prepared. While her sisters had wailed and cried, she had masked her sorrow with a straight face and got on with her life. It was only on those anniversary days that she would truly acknowledge her real feelings on the matter. She took it to heart that while the world had crashed and burned around her, it was her stoicism and unwillingness to give into emotion that had kept her safe.

But since the ball, she had allowed herself to entertain the idea of feeling once more. She had already seen its effects on her mind; the way it clouded her judgement and skewed her priorities. It frightened her - made her question what she was doing allowing another individual to affect her thoughts in such a way. But another part of her hidden deep below truly relished in the thought that someone else would be there to protect her and share her burdens. 

Though active battle was not the time nor the place to be thinking of Ren in that light. 

As the sound of firing muskets echoed throughout the Corellian countryside, Kit held tight onto the stretcher that carried a young officer. Clutching his leg, the young man groaned in pain.  

"Maintain pressure on that wound, officer - we're nearly to the tent." 

Rey took up the rear of the stretcher as they entered into the med bay, placing him atop one of the makeshift beds they had crafted due to all others being full. It had been several weeks since the nurses had entered into their training, and under the studious teaching of nurse Phasma they had become highly competent in the short time available. And they were certainly in no want of patients, for the infirmary was already crowded beyond capacity and the nurses spread thin. 

"Phasma, we've got a bullet wound over here!" Rey yelled across the room. 

"Bit busy!" came the shouted reply. The pair looked across to see Phasma doused in red, actively slicing through an officer's skin to remove shrapnel. 

As a result of her neglectful past, Kit felt oddly calm in moments of high stress and intensity such as this. Where others would seize up or flee, Kit's mind would enter into a state of action - unclouded by the very likely possibility of danger. 

Rey looked between Kit and Phasma, taking a quick moment to wipe the perspiration from her brow. Kit noticed her strained breaths and slouching posture - evidently overcome with the gravity of the situation. Trained army doctors were few and far between, on account of their preference for work outside the field. Regiments were lucky to be visited by one each month - let alone have one stationed with them. So by no fault of their own, it was up to the nurses of the 22nd Regiment to oversee all aspects of their soldiers' medical issues - even minor surgery. 

"Rey, I need tweezers, some alcohol, bandages, a stick and a needle & thread. Go - I'll look after him."

The young nurse nodded wordlessly, and dashed from the bedside. Kit took this moment to assess her patient. No wounds to the head, though dried blood had been smeared across his face almost in the shape of a handprint. His dark skin was warm to the touch, but not feverishly so. Peering into his pupils, she noticed they were of average size and were able to focus on her - she could rule out concussion, at least. 

"There were no bandages left - I've torn pieces from an old shirt."

Kit sighed, disheartened at the lack of supplies available to her team. But now was not the time. "They'll do." Now addressing the patient, "What is your name, officer?"

Through a groan, the man spoke, "Finn, it's ah-, it's Finn."

"Finn, I need you to bite down on this," she instructed - handing him the stick. He took it between his teeth and his eyebrows creased, looking at the nurses in alarm. 

"Alcohol?" asked Kit. 

"Could only find whisky."

"Douse the tweezers, needle and thread in it," Kit directed Rey, her hands occupied keeping pressure on Finn's leg. 

Taking the freshly disinfected tweezers, Kit glanced down at Finn. "This will sting." 

She removed her hand from the bullet wound, allowing trace amounts of blood to ooze from the opening. From the size of the damage, the bullet must have been small, but have been moving slow enough to not have exited the other side of his leg. 

Kit made the first move, plunging the tweezers beneath the layers of skin and muscle until she felt something hard. Finn let out a strangled hiss through his nose, clutching his fists tightly. Grasping with the small instrument, the bullet kept slipping from between the prongs, only causing Finn more discomfort. 

Wiping the excess blood to clear her path, Kit tried a new angle, coming from the left side instead. She lowered the tweezers under the bullet this time, and felt it budge as she pried it from its position. Now loose, she was free to tweeze it out, careful to not catch a nerve as she extracted the small piece of metal. 

"Got it," she proclaimed, lifting the bullet above their heads and discarding it in the metal tray. There was no time for celebration, for there was still a gaping hole on the side of Finn's leg.

"Help me close the wound," she directed at Rey. 

Together, the two nurses held Finn's leg - Rey with both hands on his thigh while Kit pushed the sides of the wound together. Taking the needle and thread, she began to stitch up the skin, remembering the way Phasma had instructed them to do so. Most doctors did not encounter such skills until at least a year into their training, but the First Order had their priorities and deemed just over a month a sufficient time to become proficient. Thank God Kit had listened that day. 

"Nearly there," she reassured Finn. He whined in response. 

With heightened precision due to her many years of studious needlework, Kit stitched her way to the vertex of the wound, applying several knots and before tearing the string with her teeth. "Done."

The pair let out a sigh of relief and Finn visibly relaxed - his laboured breathing the only sign of injury. 

"I can bandage him up - you go." 

Kit would not deny that offer, seeing as there were likely more soldiers in need of her assistance. Giving Rey's hand a reassuring squeeze, she left the infirmary in search of others.

---

At the culmination of the fighting, Kit paced up and down the aisles of the tent. Assessing the situation before her, she now fully recognised the direness of their situation. With only enough beds for thirty of the men, the others were propped up on piles of old linens or bed cushions if they were lucky. Bandages were scarce and tools were cleaned with the drinking whisky - much to the men's disappointment. Their stocks had been sufficient in the first weeks where very little battle was seen, but now their regiment was in drastic need of a supplies increase. 

Though she had broached the subject with Phasma before, Kit had not received the desired reply. It was supposedly not within the First Order's budget to be providing that quantity of medical supplies to nursing units. Phasma and Mitaka had personally brought up the issue with the War Office via correspondence, though it appeared those in charge perceived it more cost effective to train new recruits rather than pay for the rehabilitation of their injured men. She was surprised at the lack of shock that Phasma possessed at this revelation - yet Kit supposed that this had always been the way of the First Order. It was a sickening thought, and she wondered how her father had dealt with it. 

Drawn out of her thoughts by the call for a nurse, Kit turned to see that her patient from earlier was trying to draw her attention. 

"How are you recovering, Officer Finn?"

"Oh, the pain comes and goes; feels like my leg's about to fall off, but hey - at least I'm alive. You and Rey saw to that," he grinned. 

"Rey?" Kit questioned, taking note of his use of her given name. 

"Uh, Nurse Rey that is. She stayed and talked for a bit. Really helped raise the spirits." 

From the shy way he was rambling, Kit could sense that he was becoming himself again. "Is that what you want? Do you want me to go get her?" 

She tried to hide her grin. 

"I mean, if you're offering? But, I was gonna ask if you had any more bandages - I think these ones are starting to soak through."

"Let me have a look."

Drawing back the blanket, she was greeted with the old shirt rags used as makeshift bandages, though they were now spotted with blood. Were they real bandages, this would not be an issue - for they were made with absorbency in mind. This was the last straw for Kit. 

"I'll get Rey," she stated, turning on her heel with purpose. 

Passing some of the other nurses, she watched briefly as they cared for their patients with makeshift supplies. Was it because their team was led by women that their requests for supplies were ignored? Surely Mitaka would not stand for such a thing. Though he had already tried to remedy the situation. It would have to be brought to the higher-ups, and luckily, Kit had an in. 

Since her arrival, her interactions with Ren had been minimal, as he truly was the commander of the First Order Army. He was often out in the field, or surrounded by his men when at camp. There was little time for them to meet. It did not stop him from secretly acknowledging her, though - whenever he could. During battle briefings, she noticed the way he would linger on her form while Hux and Mitaka relayed their strategy of the day. They continued their letters to one another, serving as their only true form of communication. 

Passing the washing station, she located Rey. 

"Your favourite patient is asking for you. Needs some re-bandaging," Kit said suggestively as she continued on her path. 

"Well, if the patient insists." Rey smirked and wiped her hands on her apron before heading down the aisle. 

Picking up speed, Kit put on her mask of confidence and made her way to the strategy tent; the location Ren frequented most often. She would waltz in, demand a supplies increase and not leave until she was successful. How could Ren deny her? He had spoken so adoringly of her in his letters, and made mention of all the ways he wished to show it to her. If he was alone, maybe they could finally act on some of those desires. 

Standing at the door, she heard no voices from within. Good - there were no emissaries or lower ranking officials to get in her way. Pulling back the tent opening, she stepped inside without announcing her arrival and made straight for the grand desk in the middle of the office. 

"May I help you, Nurse Vara?" 

That was not the voice she expected. It was one she had heard far too much of in recent weeks. Always providing addresses to officers before they left for battle, and leading the movements as their camp was transported from one place to the next. Though she had noted that he was less unpleasant while at camp, and quite damn good at his job. She was however, still sure of her dislike for him. 

"I do not know - can you?" she offered back, attempting to mask her surprise at his being there. 

Hux sat back in his chair and raised a brow at her. The pair had had enough interactions over the past few weeks that they no longer fought a mental battle while in each other's presence. Somewhere along the way it had become far too much effort, and they were now both resigned to the other's existence. 

Though it did not stop Kit from teasing him whenever possible. And he always returned the favour. 

"Let me guess, not who you expected? Looking for someone more... pliable?"

That perturbed her. Did he know? Had he read that letter all those weeks ago? She would have to play it off. 

"No, you will do," she stated, moving deeper into the tent until she was standing before the map sprawled across the tabletop. 

"Then by all means, tell me what issue is so pressing that a junior nurse would barge unaccompanied into my tent without announcement." 

She narrowed her eyes at him, not appreciating the way he matched her attitude. "We have an issue, General."

"I'm listening."

She took a deep breath, ready to be dismissed the minute she pled her case. She would have to make it good. "Our supply stock is essentially empty and the monthly deliveries are not enough. We have men being treated with improper instruments and then being left to sleep on the floor due to lack of beds. This may have been fine a few weeks ago, but as the battles increase so do your injured soldiers. We are failing them by not providing the proper care - think of their families." She paused, not looking at him just yet - eyes focused on the map. "Just this morning, I had to remove a bullet from a young soldier and had to watch him be bandaged with rags. Is this how the First Order treats those who serve it?" Kit now placed her hands on the tabletop, drawing Hux's attention. 

He drew in a short breath at the sight of them, and Kit followed his gaze. During the chaos of the morning, she had not taken a moment for herself to clean up. Her hands lay sprawled out, covered in dried blood of all shades. The deep red sat between the creases of her knuckles, lingering underneath her fingernails and smeared over the freckles along her fingers. 

She retracted her hands, hiding the unladylike digits beneath her apron. She stared at the ground and awaited his rebuttal to her argument. He was silent for a long moment.

"Why have I never heard of these troubles?" His voice was now more subdued - gentler. Looking up, Kit saw him sitting forward in his chair, absentmindedly fidgeting with a flag placed on the map. 

"I believed you had. Phasma and Mitaka had previously appealed to the War Office."

He frowned at that. "I see. That was prior to my arrival, yes?"

"Yes General." 

"Hm. Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Vara." He stood from his chair, and gave her a slight bow. This must have been his way of dismissing her - and dismissing her request. 

She did not move. 

He sighed and went to move past her, out the exit. 

"General?" she questioned, fitting so much into one word. What was he going to do? Did he even care? Was he going to abolish the nurses altogether?

Half way out the door and with his back turned to her, he stopped in his movements. "Consider it done, Vara." 

---

Still in shock at Hux's decision to help, she had finally made her way to get cleaned up. By this time of night, the wash tent was empty. All the nurses and soldiers were occupied with dinner, so Kit was at liberty to take her time scrubbing the blood from her hands. It had seated itself deeper than she thought - having to use such force just to get the water into the ridges of her palms. 

She noticed footsteps behind her, but paid them no mind. She was still reeling from her success. Of all the people, she would have thought him the least sympathetic to her cause. But her bloody hands must have sold the point. Or maybe, he did know about her connection with Ren and feared his response if he had denied her. The thought made her smile inwardly. 

"What's made you so happy?" she heard over her shoulder. 

Whirling around, she was met with the object of her desires. Kit could not contain her gasp as Ren loomed above her, before stepping in closer and placing his hands delicately on her waist. This was the most contact they had ever been afforded, and in such a public space. 

"Ren!" she exclaimed in delight. "You will not believe what-"

Cutting in, he chuckled at her amusement, taking in her giddy expression. "Forgive me, but you should be at dinner, Kitty."

"But alas, I am not."

Pausing, he noticed a tinge of mischief in her tone. Whatever he had been intent on saying took a backseat to play along with her games. "Indeed."

"Instead, I'm here, all alone." Her smile was growing.

"All alone." 

"Where anything could happen."

"Anything?" he questioned slyly. "Like this?" Removing his hands from her waist, he dropped them to grasp her own. Still covered in a sheen of blood and water, he raised them to his lips, never breaking eye contact with Kit. Their warmth mixed with the coolness of the water was a new sensation to Kit, and one she decided felt very good. 

She took a quick intake of air, startled at how unphased he was by the taste of the blood. As he moved away from her hands, she noticed the red tinge left on his lips. It suited his dark features quite well - providing a stark contrast to his eyes. 

"Exactly like that," she finally replied. 

He gave a toothy grin, emboldened by her reaction. "And...," he leaned in closer, "how about...," face now at the same height at Kit's, "this..."

Closing the distance, Ren pressed his blood-stained lips against Kit's, engulfing her in a warm embrace as he towered over her frame. Kit could not help but moan into the kiss - so overwhelmed by the new sensations and feelings she was experiencing for the first time. She could taste the tang of blood, but mixed with something indescribably belonging to Ren as well. He remained silent, instead choosing to roam her body with his large hands. Though he kept them respectful, she could not help but blush as they dipped suspiciously close to her backside. She felt him grinning into the kiss at that, and she had to stop for air. 

Suddenly shy, Kit buried her head in his chest while he embraced her. 

"Was that your first, Kitty?"

She blushed an even deeper red upon hearing that pet name. "Maybe."

She felt his chuckle rather than heard it, and grieved the loss of warmth as he stepped away to look at her. "Well, then we shall just have to practice more often," he finished with a smirk. Raising his hand to her cheek, he wiped across her bottom lip with his thumb, clearing away the blood that lingered. All she could do was watch him, entranced by his movements. 

He looked as if he were going to speak, but was interrupted by the sound of laughter growing nearer. Sighing, he removed himself from Kit and gave her a longing glance. 

"I will endeavour to find an evening for us. Just us. I promise it," he whispered. 

"And I shall hold you to it," she replied gently. 

"I would expect nothing less." 

In an instant, he was gone - out the back exit and into the night. And Kit was left to scrub the remnants of the day's activities from her hands, revelling in the thought of her next meeting with Ren.

Notes:

Sorry this update took so long - uni has been kicking my ass. But I have a few weeks off now and am ready to write up a storm! Hope you enjoyed!

Chapter 10: County Fair

Summary:

A day at the county fair. What could go wrong?

"You cannot be serious, cousin."

"I am completely serious."

"No, you jest."

"Do I ever jest?"

"Yes! Quite a lot actually!"

"Well... you have me there. But I have never been more serious in my life! The last county fair, I swear it - the man was practically flying." 

"Mitaka, acrobats to not fly."

"But this one did, Kit!"

"Well, I doubt they will today. The papers said there were to be 'light entertainment and stalls of interest'. I do not consider that 'light entertainment'."

It was a rare day within the 22nd Regiment, in which many of the officers and nurses had been granted leave from their posts. And quite coincidentally, the Corellian county fair had fallen on the same day. Consequently, the road from the military camp was paved with young officers itching for a decent drink and looking to woo any of the young ladies of the town. Many had tried their efforts on the nurses, but had been met with swift refusal. 

However, some had been lucky.

"Is that more talk of acrobats I hear?" Rey called from behind them, arm linked with Finn's as they strolled towards the fair. It had been several weeks since his injury, yet he had healed quickly under Rey's care. Aided also by her frequent attentions. 

"Is it ever. He seems convinced they have acquired the skill of flight!" Kit called over her shoulder, turning now to face a grinning Mitaka. 

"No - he's onto something. I was there last time. The way they leapt! It was unnatural..." trailed off Finn, leaving Rey in a bout of laughter. 

Passing under an old stone bridge, the four continued on their journey while indulging in Mitaka's humorous tales. As the talk died down and Rey began a whispered conversation with Finn, Kit saw this as her moment to ask something that had been on her mind. 

"Heard from Jayne lately?" she asked absentmindedly, trying not to give away her intentions. 

"Yes, actually. I received a letter just this morning." He could not hide his grin. "She tells me how drab life is now that the regiment has left. The dances are not half as fun, supposedly."

"Well, I am offended. I wrote to her over two weeks ago and have not yet received a reply. And when I do, it's short and always the same."

Her cousin grinned to himself, blushing like a debutante. His men would never believe that this was their fearless colonel. 

"I- I think she likes me."

Kit snorted. "Because she laughed at a few of your jokes?"

He was oddly silent for a moment. "You needn't be so harsh, Kit." 

Though his tone was light, she could still feel that her words had reached a sore spot. Kit sometimes forgot that those around her could be earnest, and that not everyone was putting on an act of austerity. Mitaka was one of the few people who Kit had found to be truly sincere in all aspects of his being, even when commanding his troops. Evidently, she had taken that for granted just now. 

Frowning at her own behaviour, Kit let out a sigh. "I'm sorry, Dopheld. It's not about you. It's just... I've known Jayne for her whole life, and I've seen the way she is. The way she is with... men. I just don't want you to get hurt."

Mitaka nodded. Though their pace had slowed significantly, they still remained out of earshot of the others. "You think I could do better?"

He had confirmed the obvious - that he had fallen for Jayne. Kit had remarked once before that they made a handsome couple, but when it was a possible reality, she was not so sure. Jayne's proclivity for flirtation was a stark contrast to Mitaka's gentle nature, and Kit could not imagine Jayne ever willingly submitting to being tied down. Additionally, she had never seen her sister complete a chore or duty besides dressing herself. How Mitaka could be so enraptured by her, Kit did not know. 

When she did not make to speak, Mitaka took this as confirmation. "Kit, I hope you don't mind me speaking plainly, but is this coming from jealousy? That she may have found a match but you have not?" 

The question took her completely off guard. To speak so openly about her true feelings made her feel awfully exposed. Vulnerable even. But he had asked it with such pure intentions, with no malice whatsoever. He was just genuinely curious and wishing to understand her better. With this acknowledgement, she decided to tell the truth. 

"It comes from a place of concern, not jealousy. But if you think you could love her, and she could love you, then I will not stand in your way," she conceded. Then continued, " Besides, it could not be jealousy, for I seem to have found my own... situation." 

The speed at which his head turned toward her could have broken records. 

"I beg your pardon? Did my cousin just say that she has found a match?"

"Keep your voice down, Dopheld - I do not want others to know. But, yes. I am... romantically involved." The words felt foreign on her tongue. 

"And who is the lucky officer? You know, technically these sorts of relationships are forbidden, so I may have to reprimand him," Mitaka replied while sporting a devious smile. 

"Which is precisely the reason he shall remain nameless and you shall not ask again." Kit seemed quite relieved to get that off her chest. At least he would stop pestering her about the topic. 

"Do not worry, your secret is safe with me." He elbowed her lightly. "On the condition that you give your blessing for me to court Jayne."

She let out a defeated laugh. "If you must - but please be warned, she is not an easy individual to live with."

"Oh, I shall delight in it."

She shook her head in disbelief. "I am going to pretend I didn't hear that. Let's get to this fair."

---

By the time the four of them arrived, much of the regiment had already found themselves crowding the small stage in the centre of the fair. 

"Come on, we're late!" exclaimed Rey, practically dragging Finn through the throng of townsfolk. 

"Best listen - I heard her scolding Matherson when he pulled a muscle wrestling yesterday. Wouldn't want to get on her bad side." Kit whispered to Mitaka, who then rapidly increased his pace out of fear. 

Through the flurry of people, Kit could make out a cacophony of sounds and smells completely foreign to her. The uptight righteousness of Arkanis rarely allowed for such fun activities as these, so she took it all in with wide eyes. As they drew closer to the acrobatics performance that was well underway, she spied a small seamstress' tent, selling a selection of needles, thread and knitwear. 

Since she had unpacked her belongings, Kit had been wondering what to do with the greatcoat at the bottom of her trunk. The actions of its owner this past week seemed to have made an impact on her, as she suddenly felt indebted to Hux - though he was merely doing his job. But she reminded herself that many officials would have denied her request, and still, he did not. 

She made a mental note to purchase a mending kit from the stall after the performance. It would be handy to have around anyway. 

Kit was brought out of her thoughts as they sidled up to another set of individuals. 

"Dopheld?"

"Oh! Commander, General - didn't expect to see you two here."

"You do not think us that dull, surely?" was the General's oddly easy-going reply. Dressed in a loosely buttoned shirt and having foregone his coat, he looked nearly civilian. It was a pleasant change.  

"You convinced us, Colonel, with all your talk of the last fair. We couldn't pass up the opportunity." Ren did not seem to drop the formalities or dress standards, however. He had replaced his black commander's uniform with a dark shirt and coat ensemble void of any rank - though it still signalled an air of authority. 

"I see he has talked your ear off about it as well?" Kit questioned. 

Hux looked away from the performance to give the hint of a smirk. "Let's just say they have a lot to live up to."

Ren watched their interaction with interest, unbeknownst to both parties. When Kit actually giggled after Hux's comments, a scowl was sent the General's way. 

As the performance continued on, members of the 22nd Regiment were dazzled by the skills of the performers. From flips and handsprings to leaps and twirls, the feats had all lead up to the finale. 

Taking their places on either side of the trapeze, the two acrobats held onto the horizontal bars and swung. With no ropes or safety nets to catch them, they swayed in tandem high above the crowd. 

"This is it! This is the trick!" Mitaka made known to all that would listen. 

After picking up some speed, the pair seemed to nod to one another, and both let go of the handles. Kit let out a gasp, and Mitaka looked on in wonder. Ren and Hux shared an equally concealed look of terror while Rey and Finn clung tightly to each other. 

For what seemed like years, the acrobats remained suspended in space. It was as if gravity did not exist, as they each performed three forward rotations before re-extending their limbs. The crowd audibly held their breath, watching to see if they would make it out alive. 

With only millimetres to spare, their hands connected with the bar and they resumed their normal movements of back and forth until they were upright at their starting positions. 

Likely begun by Mitaka, the crowd began to applaud and cheer while the performers took a bow. 

"I hate to admit it, but you were correct in your assumptions, Dopheld," Hux conceded. 

"I told you - didn't I?" he said with contented satisfaction. 

Those around him just laughed - quite delighted with the Colonel's enthusiasm. 

As the acrobats exited the stage, a small troupe of musicians took their place, ready to strike up a tune. 

"It's been an age since I've seen a band perform - we must stay!" exclaimed Rey. 

Kit was about to agree, until she noticed that Ren had departed their ranks. Searching for him in the crowd, she wondered where he had snuck off to - until she found him. At the very back of the crowd, he stood with his hands in his pockets. Seeming to notice her, he motioned his head for her to follow. How could she not?

"I may have to give it a miss - there are a few stalls I want to browse before they shut. Meet you back at the camp?" 

Rey nodded, already too engrossed in the music. The others paid her little mind. 

Slinking through the masses of people, she finally exited out the other end. Ren was on the move, striding quickly to the back of a particularly large stall, covered in various cloth and fabric. Here, they were thoroughly concealed.

"I thought we'd never escape."

"Oh? You had this planned?"

For the first time that day, Ren finally embraced her. Hugging her tight to his chest and kissing her forehead, he spoke without loosening his grip. 

"It may not be an evening, but I still intend to spend it with you."

"But won't the others see?"

He nearly scoffed at that. "They seem all too enraptured by whatever foolish performance inhabits the stage. We have plenty of time."

She grinned into his embrace. This would be the closest to courtship their relationship had ever been. "If you say so."

Grasping her hand, he whisked her away from behind the stall into the outskirts where the food and beverage stalls sat interlocked with the home goods vendors. Passing behind the lanes of proprietors, the smell of freshly baked breads and pastries filled her senses. 

She kept scanning the rows of people for anyone that would recognise her and the man beside her. Mitaka had said these relationships were not permitted - though Ren had never mentioned that explicitly. In their first letter, the Commander had expressed his desire to keep their relationship a secret - for her benefit. Yet if they were to continue and progress to an engagement - though Kit still could not fathom it - they would have to announce it eventually. Maybe she would ask about it another day when they weren't surrounded by such interesting sights.  

Passing back by the entry, Kit spied the seamstress' tent. 

"There is a sewing kit over at that stall I wish to purchase - if you just give me a moment."

"Please, allow me," he retorted, leading her over there himself. Handing over the coins to the lady, he took the small package from the table and gave it to Kit, feeling very proud of himself. 

It was his first gift to her. 

---

The rest of the afternoon was spent in similar domestic bliss; sampling foods and purchasing small trinkets. Ren even indulged in the purchase of a ruby necklace for Kit. And though the stone was small, she had never been one for flashy jewellery and could not have been more in love with it. 

By now, she assumed that most of the regiment had made their way back to camp, as the stage was visibly void of any performers. Everyone seemed to have thoroughly enjoyed themselves, she mused. Though none more than her, for she finally got to feel what is was like to be courted.

Walking hand in hand with the Commander, he seemed to spot something of interest at a small, wooden store. Lined across the table were ornate glasses of various liquids, each labelled with their specific infusion. From the strong smell wafting her way, she could tell they were alcoholic - and strong.

"Here, try one of these," he said, offering her the glass after handing over the coins. 

"Smells quite potent."

"Come on, it's a special occasion," he prompted. 

Under his gaze, she would not falter. Any hesitation she had died when he looked down at her, raising a brow as if to question her. 

In several large gulps, Kit drained the entirety of the glass' contents. Ren followed soon after, maintaining eye contact as he downed each drop. The taste was surprisingly good, she had to admit. Almost floral, but with deeper undertones. And she could not even taste the alcohol. 

"Up for another?"

Taking note of his challenging tone, she considered his request for a whole millisecond before nodding her agreement. The vendor poured two more of the same concoction into their glasses then slid Ren's coin off the counter into his pouch. 

Without needing his encouragement, she gulped it down with the same vigour as before, slamming the glass down upon her completion. 

"Just as good the second time?"

"Even better," she asserted. That seemed to please him, and he was about to make a further comment before he was interrupted. 

"Commander, there you are. Snoke's envoy has arrived in the town and seeks an audience." This was an officer that Kit had never seen before, but nevertheless she immediately hid her face away and hoped that he had not noticed they were drinking together. 

Ren was fuming. Though he kept his voice low, she could still feel the anger and power behind his words. "Send  him to Hux."

"Sir, the envoy said Snoke requested you and you only," the officer trembled. 

Ren let out an exasperated sigh as he slammed his glass onto the table, very nearly shattering it. 

"This had better be worth my time."

Watching as the officer scampered away towards the township, Kit looked to Ren sadly. Their day had come to an end, as she knew it must. But it did not make it any less bittersweet. 

"Blasted officer. I had intended to walk you back. Slowly - savouring our time. Maybe find a tree to push you up against," he finished with a whisper. 

"There will be time for that another day. Now go - and don't be too harsh on him. He's just the messenger." Kit smoothed down the front of his shirt and gave a quick kiss to his jaw before releasing him. 

"I can't make any promises," he said before following the officer. 

With nothing keeping her at the fair, Kit set about on her journey back to camp. However, with each step she took, she felt her body growing warmer. It was gradual, like the slow build up of a wave, until it was crashing over her and turning her skin a light pink colour. 

With it, her head started to feel heavy. She had just made it to the path when she began to see double. 

Whatever had been in that drink must have had a delayed reaction on her body, and she wondered now how it had affected Ren. 

Ren; she really like Ren. He had kind eyes. And big hands.

Even her thoughts were being affected, it would appear. 

While she did not know it, her steps had grown sluggish and she had begun to wobble on her feet. In her stumbling, she had made it to the stony bridge they passed under that morning. 

"Now what do we have here?" came a voice from the shadows. 

"I'm sorry?" Kit asked, unsure of who she was speaking to. 

"Had a bit much to drink, girlie?" the voice continued, chuckling at the state of her. 

"Ah, no. No, only two - I think?" she tried to reason with herself, completely unaware of the way the man had begun to circle her. 

"Don't matter to me. Just means you'll scream less."

At this, he dove towards her, grabbing her arm. 

"No - let go. Let go!" She tried to thrash in his grasp, but it was useless. The drink had rendered her limbs weaker than ever and she was powerless to save herself. 

He was dragging her now, down towards the forested area beyond the path. She stared into the green abyss and silently prayed that it would be over swiftly. 

But suddenly her assailant stilled, and she heard the sound of a gun cocking. 

"Unless you wish to meet your demise, unhand her now."

Silently, the man wrenched his hand from her arm and stepped back. Kit had just turned to see the face of her saviour before she heard a startling crack as the attacker fell to the floor unconscious. 

Through her blurred vision, Kit could see General Hux sporting a pistol in one hand and clenching and unclenching his fist in the other. Red was dusting his knuckles, evidently from the punch he had just dealt the man. 

"Did he harm you?" came the strained question.

She shook her head, heart still racing from her near assault. 

"Well - good. But what were you doing alone? The others thought you had returned earlier." 

Though she could not quite make it out, she perceived that there was a true look of worry etched on his features. And he seemed to be panting quite hard. 

Taking a moment to assess her condition, he appeared to realise that something was wrong. 

"Are... are you drunk?"

"I do not know... Do I look drunk?" she asked innocently, completely oblivious. He knew something was definitely wrong, as Kit lacked all of her usual teasing. 

"Very much so." He looked into her eyes, noticing the dilation of the pupils and the flush of her cheeks. She was utterly defenceless and without control of her own body. "Though I fear the hangover tomorrow will be far worse."

"Oh."

As the rest of their party had returned to camp by now, Hux could not leave her to even procure a horse for her. Consequently, it was up to him to escort her on foot. 

"Can you walk?"

"A little."

"That will have to do for now. You can lean on me, if you require it."

"I should be fine." 

Kit had not taken even two steps in the direction home before nearly collapsing - saved only by Hux's agile grasp. 

"Place your arm over my shoulder and I shall support you from the waist."

Without complaint this time, she did as she was told and instantly felt more stable. 

They settled into a slow but effective pace, with Hux doing much of the work and Kit drifting in and out of awareness. After the first minutes of silence, Kit's intoxicated brain thought it the perfect time for some conversation. 

"Thank you for punching that man."

"I am a soldier, it is only my duty."

She crinkled her nose. "But it was still very nice of you."

He seemed to nod his acceptance of her thanks. But then she had another thought. "Hmmm, but why were you so mean before? Back when we met at the ball."

He did not know what to say to that. 

"Called my sister ghastly. And you said I was a spinster."

Again, he could make no comment in his defence. 

"Why do you dislike me?"

That comment got him to talk. "I do not dislike you."

"Well that's news."

He sighed. "I apologise if I have led you to feel that way. Those comments were untrue and impolite. As far as Arkanisians go, I would consider you among the best."

"Aww, stop it."

"I admit, I judged you without knowing you. But you have been a pleasant surprise, Kit. I fear that you are growing on me."

"Like a mould?"

That earned a chuckle from him. "Like a mould."

Resigned to the fact that she would not remember any of this, Hux smiled to himself and continued on. 

"Now let's get you back to camp. You have a rough day ahead of you tomorrow... and I will have some explaining to do." 

 

Notes:

Has anyone watched that episode of Downton Abbey where they go to the fair? This is heavily inspired by that!

And how is everyone feeling about Ren and Hux? We're starting to see some true colours showing through

Chapter 11: Eavesdropping

Summary:

Kit recovers from a hangover

Faint images drifted across Kit's eyes. Two figures, both standing on opposing sides of the room, eagerly animated in angry conversation. Arms were flailing and fingers were pointed accusingly. She had seen this scene before, she thought. On the night her mother left. 

She remembered how her face had burned hot, laying on the armchair by the fire. In those days she had been an avid reader - lulled to sleep by the tales of brave heroes who would do anything to protect the woman they loved. 

With one such book draped across her as she was jostled from her slumber, she could vaguely see her mother's face, now a distant memory, contorted in sadness. Mirroring that of her father who stood only a few feet away, the pair continued in a heated exchange. As an unknown witness to the event, Kit remained still. While she could not make out the words whispered, the conversation clearly ceased when her mother had taken her suitcase by the door, and exited into the night. 

That was Kit's last memory of her mother. And while she did not like to re-live that moment, she often found herself revisiting it at the strangest of times. But it was a memory that had always been laced with anger.  

Anger at her mother for leaving; anger at her father for what he might have said that made her leave; but most importantly, anger at herself for doing nothing. It was a regret that had gnawed at Kit's conscious since that day -  believing that maybe if she had said something, her mother would have stayed. Or taken Kit with her. 

As she was pulled into the present, she glimpsed the outline of the two figures again, standing over her. Though this time they appeared taller, and their voices were starting to become clearer. They were masculine and not at all hushed. 

"How could you have let this happen? You show up, alone, with a young woman who is nearly unconscious, and claim you do not know what happened?" a deep voice questioned sternly. 

There came a mockingly shocked sound from the figure beside. "Be mindful of how you speak, Ren. If it had not been for me, Vara would not be here. We should be more concerned by the fact she was nearly attacked, rather than placing blame. You have not even once asked-"

"And just where were you, Hux? When these events took place," the figure who she now recognised as Ren, hissed. 

"With the rest of our regiment enjoying the entertainment! Which, I might add, you were notably absent from." Hux let the accusation settle in the air, before continuing. "So, Kylo, I could ask you the same question. Where. Were. You?"

Kit had not fully regained her vision yet, but she could feel the anger seething of the taller man. "How dare you speak to your superior in such a manner. I will-"

"You will what? Send me to Snoke for reprimand? Do not think it has escaped my notice how you look at-"

"Hush! Both of you. She's awake," interrupted another voice, this time more feminine. It continued on, "Kit, it's Phasma. Do you know where we are?"

Slowly blinking back to reality, Kit squinted as the harsh light of the morning assaulted her eyes. Why was it so bright?

"Hmmm," she groaned, "the face of the bloody sun?" 

"And she's back," commented Hux. Ren glared daggers. 

As Phasma lifted a wet cloth to her forehead, Kit hissed at the change in temperature. She had not realised how high her temperature had got, and suddenly became aware of a faint pounding sensation in her head. 

"You had quite the eventful time, yesterday. Do you remember anything?" asked Phasma. 

Kit thought for a moment, staring at the ceiling of the med tent. As if wading through the fog of her brain, yesterday's events seemed to reappear in gradual succession, reliving the moments in the order they occurred.  She remembered walking there with Mitaka, and his insistence on seeing the acrobats. 

Sitting up in the bed, Kit became aware of the thin shift she wore, blushing as she pulled the blanket to cover her chest. She absolutely did not remember changing into that.

Watching as Ren's eyes tracked the movement, she had hoped to see some reassurance on his features. Instead, she saw a new expression of his that she had never seen before; worry. But she could not place why. 

"Well, I remember I left camp with Mitaka, Rey and Finn. That was sometime in the morning."

Phasma nodded at this, listening intently. 

"Then I think there were - there were acrobats, yes. And I remember the Commander and the General were there too." 

Hux appeared deep in thought, while Ren was holding on to every word she said and maintaining direct eye contact. It was almost unnerving. 

"And what happened after that? I was with the Colonel watching the band perform, but I noted you were absent by then," said Hux. 

Now she remembered what had happened. The events were clear in her mind as she recalled the way she had snuck around the fair with Ren, dodging others and buying trinkets. Why had they not been more careful? Surely someone had seen them. But that wasn't how she ended up like this. She could almost taste the sickly sweet liquor on her tongue now, unused to such delicacies. How Ren had come out unscathed, she did not know. Maybe she just did not have the same constitution for handling liquor as he did. 

As Ren's eyes bored into her skull, she could not help but cower under his gaze. It was as though he was trying to compel her to say something. But she was sure that what he wanted was not the truth. 

"I left to browse some of the stores. Bought a few items," she said as she unknowingly reached to touch the small pendant dangling from her neck. 

Hux seemed to take notice. 

"And that is all you did - all day?" questioned Phasma.

Kit looked down, knowing that she was about to lie. "Well, funny story actually. Towards the afternoon, I came across a small store selling certain... drinks. And I may have over-indulged. I can't quite remember anything after that..."

Looking up, she tried to gauge if they bought it. Phasma looked as though she believed it, while Hux was still scrutinising her words. Ren appeared relieved, and no longer bore a deep crease on his forehead. He seemed almost proud of her. 

But she truly could not remember what events followed her and Ren's trip to the liquor stall. Where was Hux involved in all of this? 

"Was this the small wooden stall by the northern entrance?" asked Hux after an uncomfortable silence. 

"I think so."

The General's eyes widened in shock. "You bought from the Tatooinian liquor merchant?" he asked in disbelief. 

"Yes..." 

"Vara, their wines are four times as strong as anything on Arkanis. One glass is the equivalent of a whole bottle! How many did you have?"

She paused, trying to remember.

"Two I think."

"How you were still standing after the first, I do not know. That liquor is known to take out even the largest soldier." 

Kit looked puzzled for a moment. "What happened after?" she asked tentatively. 

Hux sighed, almost pityingly, and Ren looked away from them. 

"I had just returned to camp when Rey voiced concern that you had not arrived. None of us had seen you since the morning, it would seem. So I came to find you, but you were already on your way home." 

This was news to Kit. She had thought that Ren would have walked her home - or at least part of the way. So that meant that some point after the drinks, he had just... left her. The thought brought a crease to her brow, and she tried to remember where he had gone. Why did he not take her with him? Surely he must have had his reasons, but the fact still hurt. 

"I was alone?" she tried to clarify.

"You were - until some vagrant happened upon you. He was trying to lure you into the woods." Hux looked to Ren who would not meet his gaze. "Once he was dealt with, I saw you back to camp, but you passed out somewhere along the journey. And now here you are." 

Kit could not reconcile what she had just heard. Passed out? How strong had that liquor been? And the thought of Hux defending her from her attacker then carrying her home left an odd feeling in her stomach. It must have been remorse for her past attitude towards him. 

"He didn't... do anything to me, did he?" she finally asked. 

"No. He must have just found you as I arrived," Hux responded calmly. 

Kit let out a relieved sigh, and she could feel some of the tension in her forehead lessen. Then, she did something she never thought she would. She smiled at him. 

It was a creased and almost painfully thankful smile, but she felt indebted to his actions. 

"Thank you, Hux. I owe you a great deal."

Clearing his throat, he looked down and returned her sentiments with a tight lipped smile of his own. "I was only doing my duty." 

She scoffed at that, still surprised by his ability to switch between arrogance and modesty. 

Ren watched, expressionless.

That appeared to be the end of her interrogation, as Phasma promptly shuffled the two men from the infirmary to continue their argument elsewhere. Luckily today, many of the beds were empty, so her tale of misadventure had not been broadcast to any injured officers. 

Coming back to her bedside, Phasma shook her head. 

"Those two are insufferable sometimes. But I am glad to see you back." She removed the cloth from Kit's head. "Now, knowing that we are simply dealing with a vicious hangover, I advise rest and many glasses of water."

Kit tried to protest, claiming that she was already starting to feel better. Her wandering mind needed something to occupy it with, and she could not imagine anything worse than sitting in bed all day. 

"But if you are feeling up to it - which I imagine you will be, because I know you - the new supplies you ordered have arrived and require organising," Phasma finished with a knowing smile. 

Kit simply nodded, satisfied with her assignment, and Phasma took her leave to assess the other patients. 

---

After a short rest, some food and a fresh uniform, Kit had made an almost complete recovery and set to work inside the store closet. Closet was an overstatement, for it was simply a small tent set aside for their additional supplies. 

When she had reappeared in the dorms, Rey had been the first to bombard her with questions. Choosing to keep the story as uninteresting as possible, she simply stated that she had a few too many drinks and that Hux helped her home. She neglected Ren's inclusion as well as her near assault because that would only provoke further questions. And while she liked Rey, she knew that her friend possessed an overbearing moral compass that would not let the issue rest until the man responsible was brought to justice. 

Kit however, was simply glad to put it behind her. 

Sharing a wall with the strategy tent, Kit tried to make as little noise as possible as she wrenched the wooden lid from each of the fresh supply crates, setting aside the contents to be organised. New bandages, splints and slings were a godsend. And as she unpackaged each individually, she could not help but beam with pride. 

She had done this; she had advocated for her patients and she had been listened to. She could see the positive impact of her own actions, and for the first time since joining up, actually felt like she had made a difference. 

As she was about to pry open the third box with a hammer, Kit heard the distinct voice of Ren drawing nearer. He sounded agitated. So she remained still. 

"I will say this one more time, so that you get it through your thick skull: I was called away by Snoke's envoy on urgent business. Satisfied?"

"Not at all. But go on - what did the envoy have to say?"

That was Hux. Were they still arguing over yesterday? 

"Mitaka should hear this too," Ren said, stepping into the tent on the other side of Kit, where the Colonel must have been. 

"What should I hear?" came her cousin's chipper voice. 

"Keep your voice down, this information is confidential," reprimanded Ren as his voice lowered. 

Now Kit's interest was piqued. 

"Apologies. Continue," Mitaka said, having lost the cheerfulness from his tone. 

"Snoke sends word from the front. The Resistance are growing in number. They've nearly doubled their forces since this time last year."

"Have they sought support from other nations?" queried Mitaka. 

There was the shuffle of paper. "No. Our own people have turned."

Now that was a surprise. Living in Arkanis, First Order propaganda had been so prevalent that Kit sometimes doubted the Resistance even existed, let alone were growing in number. 

Hux scoffed. "Are you surprised? The conditions under Snoke's rule leave much to be desired for the townsfolk."

"Is that defiance I hear?"

"Simply an observation, Ren."

"Hm. Well, I doubt that the old Queen's rule was any better, given that her people allowed her to be overthrown," he said the last word with vicious emphasis. 

"Does he make mention of her whereabouts?" Mitaka tried to change the subject. 

"Organa's base is rumoured to be somewhere in the D'Qar shire. Though she must keep regiments of foot soldiers across the continent, if there are as many to be expected," Ren reasoned.

Hux sighed exasperatedly. "Yes, we are aware - we have met with them on the battlefield many times. I thought this news was imperative to our cause?"

Hux was insistent on testing the Commander's patience today, it would seem. She had never seen this side of him. 

Ren paused for a moment. "He also writes that we have a spy within the 22nd. One of his intelligence officers intercepted a message meant for Organa. It contained information only one of our soldiers could have known." 

That took the breath away from Kit. A spy? In her own regiment. 

When they had been in active battle, Kit had not felt this way. There was still an aspect of surety, as they been prepared and ready to face the opposition. But knowing that their enemy knew their exact movements and could strike unannounced at any time sent a wave of unease through her. 

It was Mitaka who broke the silence. "What does Snoke suggest we do?"

"Nothing. We must act as though we do not know there is a traitor amongst us. The intelligence officers will take care of the rest." 

"So we just allow the spy to continue?" asked Hux in disbelief. 

"For now. But once they have been identified, we will use the Resistance's own weapon against them."

The two men had no response for the Commander. 

"That will be all. Dismissed."

Kit heard the shuffle of footsteps and thought she glanced the Colonel's silhouette passing by the tent.

"I thought I said dismissed, General."

"Oh you did," the impertinence was evident in Hux's voice. "I was simply thinking that you must be enjoying all of this."

Kit listened as Hux seemed to pace the room. 

"How so?" Ren said lowly. 

"No matter who wins this war, you're the successor." 

"Get. Out."

"With pleasure."

---

That evening, Kit ate her supper in silence. Even when Rey suggested a game of cards back at the dorms, she declined. She needed some time to herself. 

Rifling through to the bottom of her chest of drawers, she found the item she was looking for. Kit gently removed the worn greatcoat and took in its many holes and tears for the first time since she had unpacked it. She would make quick work of it with her new repair kit. 

As she sewed away studiously, her actions entered into autopilot; her mind still lingering on what she had overheard that day. 

So the old Queen Organa was behind the forces of the Resistance. 

How large was her army?

Who was the spy?

And what did Hux mean - successor? 

Notes:

Is that some actual plot progression I see? Who'd've thunk.

Hope Hux wasn't too OOC this chapter - he's just extra snarky in this one cause my guy is at his wit's end with Ren. And it's fun to write lol.

Please let me know what you think!

Chapter 12: Trauma Bonding

Notes:

Idk how but this chapter hit over 5000 words. Enjoy!

"Y'know, I never knew my parents."

Finn sat between Kit and Rey, slowly making his way through his lunch rations. Outside the mess tent, a thunderstorm rolled across the Corellian countryside. Lately there had been a lot of downtime for the members of the 22nd Regiment, as the Resistance troops seemed to have conducted a full retreat from Corellia. Instructed by Ren, Mitaka had given the order that they were to begin the march to Nabooshire. 

Kit silently wondered if the location had been selected due to its proximity to D'Qarshire - the suspected hive of the Resistance. 

"That makes two of us," said Rey as she clinked her cup with Finn's. 

Kit smirked to herself, delighting in her friend's dark humour. 

"Well, I mean, I knew of them - they just sent me to the training camps before I could even write my own name."

Mention of the training camps conjured a negative image in her mind, as she recalled her father's dislike of them. He had been of the belief that the camps delivered robots instead of men, due to their indoctrination and inability to think for themselves. 

"So your parents are alive?" Kit piped in. 

He stopped to think for a moment. "I guess so. But it's been over twenty years. No-one's ever written, and I don't think I want to try."

Kit never knew this about the soldier. It would seem they had something more in common; that being that they both had no wish to seek out a living parent on account of their actions. Somehow she envied Finn, as he did not know what actually losing a parent who had been present was like. It was a selfish thought, but one she could not help but feel. 

It appeared Rey did not know this about Finn either, as the nurse possessed a deeply saddened expression at the news. Kit watched as Rey grasped his hand and gave a gentle squeeze. 

Trying to lighten the mood, Finn refilled her cup from his own wine ration. 

"I suppose that means you were in the academy during the revolution?" inquired Kit, now curious. Since mention of the war the other afternoon, Kit had been on high alert for anything of note. 

Finn grimaced. "Don't remind me. That day... there was so much blood. I'd only been assigned to a regiment for a month at that point - I was still practically a child." He took a sip of his wine. "They turned out everyone in that palace; women and children too. I remember seeing the King Consort's body just... lying there. He'd been slashed through the middle. Some of the other soldiers told me the Prince had met a similar end." 

Rey and Kit were silent, unsure what to say. From the crease of his brow, this was something Finn had not spoken of in some time. With each story he told, he appeared to be re-living the events in real time. 

"What happened to the old Queen? The Order never made it public," Rey asked softly.

He chuckled at that. "They've done a good job of hiding that, haven't they? I think the official narrative is that she was confined to a cell. But after seeing what they did to Solo... I'd be surprised if she still had her head."

Again, a depressing silence settled in on their table. 

Was that... resentment she heard from Finn? Did he dislike the Order enough to betray them for the Resistance? Mentally scolding herself, Kit let the thought leave her mind - it would do her no good to conspire about such things. She had been around Finn long enough by now to know that he was a trustworthy individual. 

Still, her mind was running a hundred miles a minute. She knew that the old Queen was alive - the head of the Resistance, actually. Though she did not know why it was being kept a secret. Kit supposed it was likely Snoke did not wish to appear weak, and announcing the survival of the Queen he usurped years ago would only inspire hope in her followers.

Being with soldiers for so long had her thinking like one.

Never being one to wallow in emotion, Rey broke the silence, "So uh, back on the topic of parents - we've told you about ours, or lack thereof. Your turn, Kit."

Taken aback, she turned to Rey and had to collect her thoughts for a moment. 

"Well, you know that my father was the Colonel, but he passed a few years ago." She was fidgeting with her hands now. "And my mother... she ran off. Just up and left one night - the same year of the revolution, actually. It was an interesting time for my family." 

This conversation simply kept on spiralling. It was midday now, and they should have been on the road, but the weather had put a stop to their plans. With naught to do, what else was there but to entertain deep cutting questions such as these?

"I assume you don't want to contact her either?" Finn spoke. 

It was Kit's turn to laugh. "I wouldn't even know where to address the letter!"

As her cup slammed on the table, it was the final straw for the trio. Relishing in the complete direness of each of their parental situations, they burst into a fit of laughter that had tears streaming down their faces. 

As she wiped the beads from her eyes, Kit realised that she had never experienced this sort of connection with fellow individuals; as most of her friendships on Arkanis were built around discussions of weather and church services. It was not polite to discuss one's childhood trauma in the Arkanis county, but in the camp of the 22nd Regiment it was a different world.  

Thinking back on her old life, Kit could not comprehend how she ever survived. Yes, she had her job as a governess to keep her occupied, but she had possessed no prospects for the future, and quite frankly, was miserable. 

Her newfound enjoyment of nursing was near unfathomable, as Kit had never gained such satisfaction from her work before. Yet it was this stark difference that prompted Kit to realise that she had lacked the proper temperament of a governess. It wasn't due to an absence of kindness, but rather she was too self reliant. When Vivienne would misspell a word, it had been Kit's instinct to encourage her to think it through for herself - unable to understand how anyone could make such a mistake. For that had been how Kit had learned. She never had anyone to rely on, so why should Vivienne ? 

At least, that is what she had thought at the time. Now, having some distance from her situation, Kit recognised this as flaw of her upbringing. She had developed that response due to being neglected, and years of going unnoticed by those around her. 

  But here, she was wanted. Already, she had risen in the ranks of the nurses and been assigned more responsibility around the camp, second only to Phasma. Her patients would often request her by name, and would thank her following their successful recovery. The shifts were hard and battle could be daunting, but at last she had purpose. 

But above all, Kit dared to think she finally felt loved. From Rey and Finn, the feeling was akin to the way she loved her siblings, and she felt an innate desire to protect and comfort them. They of course reciprocated that feeling, exhibited by their near constant attention after the incident at the fair. 

From Ren, it was something else entirely. The way he looked at her, spoke to her, toucher her - it was almost too much for her senses. The first time he kissed her, he had awoken something inside her that had laid dormant for her whole life, just waiting to bubble to the surface. Her thoughts were wholly consumed by him - despite the fact she had not seen nor heard from him in the days following the fair. 

The fair. Where he had left her, intoxicated and alone. How could she forget?

Suddenly, all those beautiful feelings were marred with unease. 

Thinking clearly for a moment, she decided on the spot that she needed to confront him about this. Had he been avoiding her?

When she had slyly asked Hux about his whereabouts the other day, the General had responded that the Commander was away on official business, and could not say when he would be returning. It could even be that he was not returning; for he was the Commander - and unlike the General and the Colonel was not based with a single regiment. In fact, Hux was not even directly based with the 22nd - he oversaw several other regiments. It was only Mitaka's inexperience that saw Hux's posting with the 22nd, there to assist until her cousin passed the lengthy  probationary period. 

This made Kit grin, imagining Hux as a professional babysitter. 

"What's got you three so jubilant?" said a voice behind her. It was deep and said almost monotone. She knew immediately who it was. 

"Ah, nothing Commander. We were simply discussing our families," Rey said without looking him in the eyes. 

"Then I suggest you discuss them more quietly," he responded with the same lack of emotion. Kit had to pretend to be equally intimidated, though it was not a difficult task as he presently sported his hood, obscuring his features from the light. "Nurse Vara, come," he said before immediately walking in the direction of the strategy tent. 

Wasting no time, she did as she was told. Tossing her companions a strained smile, she stepped from the tent into the downpour outside. She recalled that it had been like this on the day she arrived at camp. 

As she trailed Ren's cloaked figure from several meters back, she tried to look as confident as possible. Scanning around, there was no-one else stupid enough to remain outdoors in this weather. Probably for the best, as she did not want to get caught in this predicament. 

The entrance to the tent waved gently in the storm, and she passed under it into the warmth of the cosy structure. 

There he stood. His ominous frame swathed in black - a new uniform, she noted as he removed his now sopping wet coat. This one had more structure, and now sported several stripes along the shoulder pad to indicate his rank. The blood-red sash that crossed his chest diagonally was also a new addition, and it reminded Kit of the garb that the paintings of Snoke depicted him wearing. He looked every part Snoke's successor. 

Kit thought back onto the overheard conversation the other day and wondered how he could also be Organa's successor. Maybe he was once a member of court, envious of the crown and sought to take it himself? These ideas were getting more far fetched by the day.

As he leaned back onto the desk, he cocked his head to the side and looked her up and down. 

Wiping some of the water from her face, she felt like a child about to be reprimanded and was compelled to speak. "Is that new? It suits you quite well, actually, and you know-"

"Kitty," was all he said, holding up a hand to silence her immediately. 

Once again, she did as she was told. When he saw that she made no attempt to resume her speaking, he let out a long sigh.

"I owe you an explanation." He paused. Looking down, he seemed to scuff the dirt with the toe of his boot. 

"Is this about the fair?" she asked quietly. 

He grimaced. "Yes. You probably think I left you there, alone at the liquor stall."

She contemplated this. Her memories were only clear up until the moment he left. She could not remember why it was he left, though. 

"I had considered that," she said, not meeting his gaze. 

"That's what I was afraid of. You know that I would never do anything to hurt you that way, don't you?" he reasoned, stepping forward and taking one of Kit's hands in his. He brought it to his lips and kissed it lightly as he looked her in the eyes. 

"I know."

"Good," he spoke into her hand. "Then you should know that an envoy arrived as we were indulging. Do you remember that?"

"Not really, no."

"Ah, that wine was strong," another kiss. "But he relayed a message to me that I was needed urgently. I told you to stay by the stall... and that I would return shortly to escort you home."

Oh. She did not remember that. Her drunken state must have been far more severe that she could remember. As Ren's hot breath caressed her fingers, she was suddenly wracked with a wave of guilt. 

It had been her fault that she was in that situation. She had caused all this worry because she had not listened to instructions. And worst of all, she had allowed Ren to be blamed for it. 

Her sweet, gentle, Ren.

"Oh, I am a fool. I am so sorry..."

"You do not know how worried I was, Kitty. What if something else had happened to you? Do you know how distraught I was?"

"Kylo, please, look at me. Please forgive me," Kit pleaded, holding his face in her hands and trying to prevent her own tears from falling. 

He lazily looked down at her, taking in her distraught appearance. "You know, I was going to tell you I loved you that night."

"You... love me?" 

"But you know that, don't you?"

She was too shocked to speak. Still reeling from his words, she could not form a coherent thought. His expression looked as though he was waiting for something. She knew it was customary for one to say it back, at this point.

"I love you," she blurted out, on autopilot. Had that been the right response? Searching his face for any type of reaction, she got nothing.

"Then show me."

Almost hesitantly, she connected their lips. It was the first kiss she had ever initiated, and still could not tell if she was doing it right. When he started to kiss back, she gained some confidence and began to trail her hands down his neck. Pulling at the hair on the back of his head, she earned a moan from him. He liked that.

This sparked something in Ren, as he broke the kiss and held her cheek in his hand. He scanned her eyes for a moment and used his thumb to wipe away the traces of tears and rain that had fallen just below her lashes. Reaching down to her waist now, he turned her around so that his back was to the tent entrance and her knees collided with the desk. 

He hoisted her up so she was sitting on it, and stepped into the space between her legs. Opening them, she let him get closer, until their bodies were pressed tightly against each other. As he resumed their kiss, this time more hungrily, Kit clung to the red sash across his new uniform. Her own dress was still drenched from the rain, leaving dark patches on his clothing as they moved together. 

When the Commander's grip on her waist ceased, Kit felt his hands begin to move. She let him roam further than they had before, feeling as if she owed this to him. He had not abandoned her; she had merely wandered off and caused him so much worry. This was the least she could do. 

As his digits skirted along her neck, he followed them by leaving a lingering kiss right behind her ear. This left goosebumps in its wake, causing a shiver to run down her body. He grinned at this, and began to kiss further down her neck, to her collar bone. 

There, he looked up at Kit with those dark eyes. His pupils had completely engulfed the iris, and any brown was now replaced with a black, lustful void. 

He seemed to be asking for permission - for what exactly, she did not know - but nodded her approval anyway. 

He gave one last kiss to the dip of her clavicle before dragging his hands up the bodice of her dress to rest lightly on the outside of her breasts. Giving a tentative squeeze, his eyes remained completely engrossed by the movements of her body under his control. 

She was blushing furiously at this point, feeling almost light headed at the attention her body was receiving. 

The front lace of her bodice stood as an adversary to Ren's mission, and he began to make quick work of it, pulling at the threads. To his dismay, the lacing only revealed the swell of her breasts and did not dip any further. Like a man starved, he immediately latched onto the supple curve of her breast, biting skin that no man had ever touched.

Kit came to cradle his head, using him as support to keep her upright during the pleasureful ministrations. She let out a shrill gasp as Ren plunged deeper into her bodice and bit onto her nipple. Nipping gently at the small mound, he rolled the other one between his fingers and sighed into her chest contentedly. 

The storm outside continued to rage, and thankfully blocked out any sound coming from within the tent. 

Surrendering to these new sensations, Kit closed her eyes and leaned her head back in bliss. The wet sounds from Ren's mouth continued on, as he alternated between sucking, biting and kneading her pert nipples. 

Quickly, she began to feel another sensation grow within her. The constant stimulation of her breasts started to build up a sort of invisible pressure. She was now chasing something, needing Ren to keep going and never stop. No sooner had she pushed her breast deeper into his mouth than she heard the tent flap open and someone hastily step inside. 

A sharp intake of breath. 

Kit opened her eyes.

It was Hux. 

"Kit...?" he said in shock, panting as though he had just been running, while taking in the scene before him. 

The world stilled for a moment. 

With Ren still attached to her nipple, Kit made direct eye contact with Hux. In no mood to stop, the Commander bit down harder on the erect bud, causing her to let out an involuntary whimper. 

Hux looked away now, cheeks a shade of tomato red that Kit had never seen before. 

Pushing Ren off her, Kit hastily re-tied her dress, all the while avoiding eye contact with either of the men. The shame of it all was too much to bear. 

And she did not wish to see Ren's reaction to being interrupted, especially by him. 

As the Commander turned to face his adversary, Kit watched as his shoulders tensed in barely concealed anger. But before Ren could give Hux the verbal lashing Kit was sure he had prepared, Hux thrust a piece of parchment into Ren's hands. 

"Save it, Ren. I do not know what I just witnessed, but it can wait. We are under attack."

As though his words were prophecy, a large blast could be heard in the not too far off distance. Several more followed, getting closer and closer each time. That was until the walls of the strategy tent were blown open, as an explosion ripped through the structure and thrust all three of them to the ground. 

Kit felt the force of the blast move through her body, with only her arms to cushion her fall. She felt the weight of something being knocked on top of her, and from the strands of fiery red hair that she could glance from her position, surmised it must have been Hux. Though he was a lithe man, his weight on top of her was impossible to shift, and he must have been knocked unconscious for he lay completely limp on top of her. 

Attempting to shift him from her, she pushed on his shoulder and was met with a painful groan as he began to come to. 

"Hux? Hux! Wake up!" 

He blinked a few times, squinting at the light and Kit could see a small trickle of blood running down his ear. He must have taken the brunt of the force, standing so close to the entrance. 

Seeming to realise his position on top of her, he hastily removed himself and stood up on shaky feet. Kit did the same.

"Are you alright?" he asked concernedly, searching her face for any sign of injury. 

"I'm fine. But you'll need to see Phasma," Kit said instinctively, reaching her hand up to brush against Hux's ear. As she made contact with the blood and pulled away so he could see it, he did not seem phased at all. Too used to the sight of injury at this point in his career. 

It was then that she remembered there was another in this room. 

"Ren!" she called, searching the torn remains of the tent for her lover. 

Though the rain had ceased, moisture still hung in the air and the clouds were just as dark. 

"Ren can you hear me?!" she screamed into the void. No answer. 

Outside, the blasts had stopped and given way to the commotion of soldiers and nurses trying to regain order. There was no fighting audible, as the explosions seemed to have been an isolated incident. But Kit could hear none of that. Lying face down in the mud with his new uniform soiled was the Commander. 

In every other battle Kit had served as a nurse, her ability to keep a clear mind and spring to action had carried her through successfully. Sometimes afterwards, if she had time to reflect on the day, she would think about the soldiers' friends and families and how they must feel knowing that their loved one was injured. But in the heat of the moment, these humanising thoughts were detrimental to her work, so she elected not to dwell on them.

She had always been able to separate her feelings from the work. But in this moment, she could not. 

For the second time that day, tears pricked the corners of her eyes as she dropped to the dirt beside him. Rolling him onto his back, he lay limp in her arms. He must be dead - gone forever. Kit began to hyperventilate, shaking his body to try and wake him up. 

"Wake up wake up wake UP!" she screamed as she squeezed him arm. "Why aren't you waking up..." 

Her body shook with the force of her sobs, before she felt a comforting hand from Hux on her shoulder. 

"Kit - Kit, he's breathing. Calm down," he said in a soft voice. 

But she could not see the breaths. How could he know he was alive?

"Feel his pulse," Hux said as he took Kit's fingers in his own and placed them on Ren's pulse point below his neck. 

Oh, yes. She remembered now. That was the first thing she had ever been trained to do to check for signs of life.

For a moment, nothing. Then she felt it. The soft pulsating of his jugular. Carrying the blood - the lifeforce - around his body. A sure sign that he was alive. 

Then under her fingers, she felt him begin to stir. He sat up with a sharp intake of breath.

As Ren took in his surroundings, Kit was caressing his face and looking him over. 

He was fine. He was alive. He was alive. 

Without wasting any time, the Commander was on his feet. Kit remained kneeling, still trying to comprehend the fact that Ren was alright. 

"Go find the Colonel. I'll assemble the men," he directed the General. 

Hux merely gave a chaste nod and the Commander was on his way. 

For a moment, the General stood there and looked down at Kit. She expected it to be a look of disgust, after having caught her in a compromising position. But instead he looked at her with what appeared to be pity. Smiling sadly, he offered a hand to her, pulling her up and supporting her back as she re-gained her stance. 

"Will you be alright?" he asked, genuinely concerned for her.

"I think so. Phasma probably needs me."

"Alright."

That seemed to satisfy him, and he released his hold on her back. She silently missed the warmth it had provided, as she began to run through the mud in the direction of the med tent. 

---

"Zali, I need you to hold her down. How is her temperature?" asked Kit in rapid succession.

"She's burning up," exclaimed the younger nurse. 

"Damn!" she allowed herself to swear. "Alright, Rey are you ready?"

"Affirmative."

"I'm going to enlarge the opening, and I need you to cauterize the wound and prevent the bleeding. Then hand me the forceps so I may re-set the bone."

As soon as she had entered what remained of the med tent, Kit had found her head nurse lying in a heap on the ground. Most startling was the odd angle her leg was positioned at - evidently broken during one of the blasts. Having had sufficient time to regain herself, Kit set to work immediately, calling for other nurses to assist in the operation. 

But with her mentor actively lying on the operating bench, it was up to Kit alone to oversee its completion. 

Taking hold of the scalpel, Kit cut through the layers of mangled flesh to create a clean opening in the wound where the bone was protruding. Rey set to work at cauterizing the veins, using the heated piece of metal. Kit checked for any signs of discomfort on Phasma's face, but found her still knocked out from the combination of the force and the pain she undoubtedly experienced. 

Kit could clearly see the fracture of the bone now, snapped through the centre and in need of re-alignment. 

"Forceps."

Rey did not need to be told twice, and handed over the equipment. 

Once she had a tight grip on the inner piece of bone, Kit twisted it gently to the correct angle and pushed it deeper into the muscle where it belonged. The protruding bone was next, and she took extra care to extract the excess skin it had ripped on its exit outward. Bringing it back down into the cavity left by its protrusion, Kit held her breath as she connected the two pieces of bone along the point where they had separated. There was a soft sound of grinding bone as the leg was moved back into place, but it did not move from its position once set.

Letting out a sigh of relief, kit removed her forceps and set about sewing up the layers of muscle and skin she had sliced through. 

Zali also assisted with this, as the wound was significantly large enough to warrant a second pair of hands. 

So engrossed in her work, Kit did not notice the General and Colonel enter the tent to assess the situation. Upon seeing Phasma on the operating table, they stood silently to the back of the room to await the outcome. Apparently the conflict outside was not pressing enough to attend to. 

"Will she recover?" Zali asked tentatively, wiping the blood from her hands as she completed her stitching. 

"I believe so. She'll need to see a proper doctor before she puts any weight on it - but I don't know how soon one can get here. There was no nerve damage and she hasn't gone septic. We've done all we can do," Kit reassured calmly. This Kit was such a stark difference to the girl who had been sobbing an hour ago. 

"I'll get her transported to a bed," offered Rey. Zali instinctively went to assist, the pair wheeling her off to the other room. 

It was then that the men made themselves known. 

"You did well, cousin."

"Mitaka! What are you," she looked to Hux now, "both of you, doing? Is there not a battle to attend to?" Kit questioned with a great deal of confusion. 

The Colonel and General looked between each other, as if mentally deciding what to tell her. 

Hux threw caution to the wind. "There was no battle. It was one man."

"One man?" she repeated incredulously. 

"A lone archer, targeting our gunpowder stocks with flaming arrows," offered Hux.

"Just one? How did he know where we were storing them?"

"Must've been watching us. Our camp hasn't moved in days, so he would have had ample time to do so," Mitaka reasoned, almost as if he were trying to convince himself as well. 

"And there were no fatalities; Phasma seems to be the worst off. It was as if he were trying to slow us down, rather than kill anyone."

Kit wondered something. Was it truly possible he had been watching them, or was he given the details by an informant? This had to be the spy at work. 

"Did you apprehend him?" she asked lowly. 

Mitaka winced. "Ren saw to that. The archer made it not even a mile on his horse before they ran him down. He's been taken to one of the tents for interrogation."

Kit caught his meaning, and realised that the archer was unlikely to ever make it out of said interrogation. Hopefully the Commander would be able to extract information on the spy, at the least. Though she silently prayed that he would show mercy to the man unfortunate enough to be captured. She dreaded to think what he must be going through presently. 

Deciding not to dwell on the gruesome images that sprang to mind, Kit changed the subject. 

"Phasma's leg is back in place, but she'll need a real doctor. Can we arrange one?"

"I'll see to it right away," confirmed Mitaka. He took his leave of them. 

Now it was just Kit and Hux. So much had transpired in the last few hours, she did not know where to begin. 

Looking to him, she noticed that his pristine hair was greatly dishevelled in almost the same way it had been when they first met. In fact, she reasoned that his character could almost be considered similar to what she had initially perceived it to be, rather than the rude attitude he had possessed in their meetings following that night. 

"I can take it from here, Kit. Go get cleaned up," he motioned with his head to the door. She appreciated that he did not press her any further and offered him a small smile as she took her own leave. 

A thought suddenly occurred to her; when had he started calling her Kit? 

She chuckled to herself as she trudged back through the mud. How different her new life was. 

But now was not the time to be introspective. 

As she made her way to her quarters, Kit's mind was wholly consumed by the thought of a warm bath and a hot meal.

It had been a long day. 

Notes:

Whew that was a lot. What did we think of Ren's apology - or lack thereof? (Hopefully the tiddy suckin wasn't too out of place haha. And as a side note, nipple orgasms are 100% real!)

But now Hux knows! What do you think he's gonna do about it???

Chapter 13: Promotion

Summary:

How will Hux react now that he knows about Kit and Ren?

Sister,

Please save your scolding for later - I can already hear you berating me for not writing to you properly all these months, so allow me to get the formalities out the way: hello, how are you?

(There - are you satisfied?)

I have been quite busy in assisting with Vivienne's tutorship, you see. We are waiting until Dany can properly hire another governess, but I fear that will never happen given her indecisiveness. She says hello too - but as the 'lady of the house' claims she has far too many household duties to attend to. I sense there is little truth in that statement. Canady is... Canady and Vivienne is well.

 She is a nice child, but I fear we are no good for each other; she complains of boredom and I cannot help but feel the same. Our painting lessons have never even exceeded the half hour! And I do not think we have ever attempted an arithmetic lesson...

Anyway, enough about us. From what Dopheld tells me, you are quite well and have even found your calling. Who would have thought all those times you patched up my knee would prove useful? Though when I hear tales of your exploits, I cannot help but feel ill. How do you do it, sister? The sight of blood is bad enough, but to have to see torn flesh and - God forbid - bone. It is not the sort of situation a proper young lady should have to ever encounter. 

Though I suppose you do not mind that, do you?

When the town found out you had left your position as governess, you became the prominent talking point for quite some time. And it would have been longer, were it not for my abilities. (You do not know how tiring it is to have to talk your family out of the rumour mill.)

Oh sister, the stories that were told. I overheard Lady Forster suggesting that you had run off to join the Resistance, while Mrs Jensen seemed to imply that you were with child! 

I do confess, that last one made me laugh. Once I told them of your new profession and your selfless deeds they seemed to cease their gossiping. Though I admit I did write to Mitaka just to confirm. He tells me you are not about to have a child out of wedlock, so congratulations sister.

You know, he is starting to grow on me. I had always found him quite pleasant, but now that he is no longer with us every day in Arkanis, I find myself truly missing his presence. And yours, of course - that is given. But I miss him in a different way. There is something about him that I cannot deny I am drawn to. 

And I cannot believe I just wrote that out on paper.  

You must under no circumstances show him this. But God, he makes me laugh. 

And I know in the past I have been quite... liberal in sharing my flirtations, but since he returned to the field I have ceased my old ways. There is even a ball to be held in a short while, and I have no intention of entertaining any of the men. I probably sound like a completely different person. 

But that is all you shall get from me, lest I make an even greater fool of myself on paper. 

Until next time (or when you come to your senses and come home),

Jayne. 

 

Kit squinted at the words on the page, still partially in disbelief at what she had just read. Did her sister truly reciprocate Mitaka's feelings? She had thought Jayne to be merely toying him along as she had several men in the past. But the way Jayne wrote about him - she had never witnessed her sister be so sincere. This could be nothing but the truth.

Maybe Kit's absence was beneficial to her family, given the great strides that had been made in Jayne's character during her months with the Regiment.

It was a grim thought. 

Outside her tent, the midday sky had shown its face - this time absent of rain. Finally, they would be able to begin the trek to Nabooshire. Yet there was still the matter of yesterday's events to discuss. She was grateful at least that Rey had allowed her to sleep in, electing to attend the patients in her stead. She had even delivered Kit's mail, which she presently read while seated on the edge of her bed. 

Kit silently giggled to herself at the notion the townsfolk thought her with child. Had they even met her? If they had, they would know that pregnancy was something she secretly feared - not only due to the pain of birth but what came after it. The thought of being responsible for the life of another being was possibly even more terrifying than anything physical. A child was akin in Kit's mind to a living cage. Once a woman had a child, she was no longer her own person, but someone's mother. It meant you were tied down and unable to do whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted.

It would mean losing freedom. 

And now that Kit had finally had a taste of it, she knew she could never relinquish it again. 

Were these thoughts a response to her childhood - she did not know. And she did not like to dwell on them for very long either, as she only found herself encountering them when she allowed her thoughts to spiral and catastrophize. But then she would push them all down and they would go away. 

Yet today they were lingering. She did not wish to appear cocky, but marriage seemed like a highly likely possibility for her and Ren. Given the actions they had participated and been caught in together, it would be dishonourable of him to do otherwise. It dawned on her that he was to be Snoke's successor at the end of his reign, so Ren would ascend the throne. 

Did... did that mean that she was to be queen? 

And queens, even when royal by birth, had but one job of importance; produce heirs. 

Oh. 

She had never truly considered this. Was she destined to become the very thing she feared?

Snoke did not have a queen to produce heirs - so why would Ren need one? Surely he could choose his own successor as Snoke did, and they could live out their days childless and happy. Couldn't they?

But there was a gnawing feeling in her stomach that said otherwise. Unlike Snoke, Ren was young. And... virile from what Kit had begun to witness. There could be no excuse for their lack of heirs. 

She imagined herself for a moment.

Decked out in golden finery, with her hair twisted high on her head and held in place by copper hairpins, she found herself leisurely reclined on a cushioned chaise lounge of equal finery. Cradled to her chest, a small child with dark hair slept softly while an older boy with similar features sat on the floor reading. Their eyes bore the darkest shade of brown, and it was no question as to who they inherited that feature from. 

The image was peaceful. Serene, even. But that was just a figment of her imagination. She must have been reaching her fertile days of the month for her mind to be promoting the idea of childbearing in such a way. With her rational thoughts kicking in, she shook the image from her mind. Though this was still a discussion she needed to have with Ren. 

"Had a good lie in?" 

It was Rey. Though it was still early, the young nurse had dark patches of various shades littering her apron and her hair had began to fall out of place. 

"I did, thank you." Kit took a moment to look her friend over. "What happened to you?"

"Oh! Just re-building the med tent. Or what's left of it, at least." Rey paused, seeming to remember something. "They took Phasma away, early this morning. She's been sent ahead to Nabooshire, where they've got a proper doctor."

"Good... good. I didn't know Mitaka would be able to get her out so soon," said Kit. She silently lamented that she did not get to say goodbye, but knew it was for the best that she receive treatment as soon as possible. The older nurse had truly been a mentor to Kit, and now she wondered how their nursing unit would move forward from this. 

"Speaking of the Colonel, he's asked me to fetch you. Seems he needs to discuss some things," Rey added, and Kit suspected that this was the reason behind her visit. 

Sighing, Kit removed herself from the bed and put Jayne's letter in her pocket. "It would do no good to keep him waiting, then." 

The two nurses shared a look, before grinning at each other and going about their business. 

---

"You called for me, cousin?" Kit made her presence known.

Sitting at his desk, a very sleep deprived Colonel Mitaka looked up from his work. He blinked a few times too many, and Kit caught a glimpse of the redness in the whites of his eyes. 

"Though I fear you should be in bed," she added. 

He did not react immediately, but once he seemed to comprehend the joke, rested his forehead on the desk and began to giggle. 

This man needed sleep. 

"Oh, don't we all. I haven't left this room since yesterday." He looked up now, groggy as ever. "It is tomorrow now, isn't it?"

"Well, yes," Kit broke the news. 

"Good - I was beginning to lose track. I've been up for thirty hours, I think?"

Kit just looked at him alarmed. 

"Anyway, enough about me," he giggled aloofly. Kit saw his features shift slightly, and knew that he was now in Colonel mode. "I've actually brought you here to discuss a serious matter."

"Yes?"

"Rey has probably told you I sent Phasma to be escorted to Nabooshire, hasn't she?"

"She has."

"Then you would know that your unit is currently without a head nurse."

"I had considered that. Do you wish for help in selecting a new candidate?"

Kit did not know if it was the sleep deprivation or if he was now genuinely looking at her with that odd look of confusion.

"You misunderstand me, Kit. I want you to to be head nurse."

Now it was her turn to look at him confused. Flattered, but ultimately confused. 

"Are... are you sure, cousin? I'm certain there are more knowledgeable nurses in the unit - besides, I've only been with the Regiment for a few months..." she deflected. 

He grinned. "That's all well and good, Kit, but knowledge can be taught. Initiative and leadership while under pressure cannot. Call it nepotism, but you happen to be in possession both." 

This was unexpected. 

She did not know why her first instinct was to deny the offer, when in reality, the prospect excited her. She had a passion for her occupation, and now that was being recognised and rewarded. She would allow herself this victory. 

It felt good. 

"I do not know what to say. Thank you, cousin."

"I've talked this over with Hux, and he had no objections with your appointment. You must've made quite the impression since the ball; he had nothing negative to say for your character."

She cringed at the mention of the ball. "You don't still remember that, do you?"

He snorted. "How can I not? You should have seen him afterwards - he was practically fuming. I always wondered what you said to make him so."

Sighing, she thought back on her actions that night. How obnoxious she had been - though it was warranted by his rudeness. "I said I was simply not in the mood for dancing... then I danced with the Commander." 

The memory made her smile. With the Commander, she had been hooked since they danced together. But her relationship with the General had morphed from one of hate, to dislike, then to indifference and now to a mutual respect for one another. Though they were not exactly friends in the way she and Rey were, she no longer detested his presence and found him to be quite a genuine individual at times. She may even welcome his company were they to find themselves at the same lunch table. Whether that remained true after he caught her in a compromising position remained to be seen.

Mitaka tried and failed to hold back a toothy grin. "He was abnormally irate that whole time we were in Arkanis, come to think of it. At least now you've seen him in his natural environment."

Now she smiled. "Was that all, Mitaka?"

"From me. The General wanted to discuss something with you - he should be in his tent."

---

Having stopped by her dorm on the way to the General's quarters, she now held the repaired greatcoat within a satchel at her side. Kit figured she would need all the bargaining power she could muster to ensure he did not take action against her compromising behaviour. 

Standing before his tent, this was new territory for Kit. Only officials and envoys were permitted to enter, as they functioned as his living quarters in addition to office. Though Kit supposed she was now a higher ranking member, given her promotion. She secretly wondered if his living space was as neat and tidy as he was.

Without a door to knock on, she cleared her throat before speaking through the fabric, "Permission to enter?"

There was silence from within the tent, save for the rustling of movement.

She tried again. "It's Kit."

"Enter."

Taken aback at the instant reply, she did as she was directed and stepped under the entrance flap. She did not know what she expected of his quarters, but it was not this. In the front chamber, a wooden desk was perched underneath a low hanging lamp. On its surface, various books were spread open while pieces of written-on parchment lay on top. Glancing behind the sheet that signalled the entrance to his bedroom, she could barely make out a softly lit room with several rugs covering the floor. 

It looked lived in; warm. 

Presently, its owner was shining a pair of worn boots. He did not stop his actions as Kit drew nearer, but merely looked up to acknowledge her presence. He was daring her to make the first move. 

"I must say, you deal with sleep deprivation far better than my cousin."

That got him to stop. Grinning, he put down the brush and stood to meet her eye level. Or more accurately, tower over it. She always forgot how tall he was. 

"I had the advantage of several coffee rations," he added, crossing his arms in amusement. 

"Ah, so you cheated," she joked. As he turned his head downwards to laugh, she caught a glimpse of dried blood surrounding his ear. She recalled last night recommending that he see Phasma about it, but she supposed she was now Phasma. "And how is your ear?" 

As if suddenly remembering he had an injury, he touched it lightly, wiping away he red. "I should hope nothing is too damaged. Though I have dealt with worse," he shrugged. 

She sighed at his nonchalance. "Let me take a look." 

Leaning down to her height, he allowed Kit to examine him. On instinct, she grasped the side of his face with one hand, while using the other to lightly graze over the shell of his ear. As she moved closer to the junction of his jaw and neck, he let out an involuntary shiver and shaky breath. 

"Is that part sore?" she asked innocently. 

It took him a moment to compose himself. "No... only sensitive."

Continuing in her examination none the wiser, she surmised that he had suffered a torn eardrum after the explosion. "It should heal on its own in a few weeks. It may just be a little painful until then."

He stood up again once more, notably a shade pinker than before. "Thank you, head nurse," he said with emphasis. 

She blushed, now reminded that they had not discussed the pressing matter at hand. 

"On that topic, I wanted to thank you for the promotion. But I must say it came as a surprise, given certain... circumstances." She looked away in embarrassment. 

Hux seemed to share her discomfort, as he had no sarcastic comment to offer this time. 

"You mean when I caught you and Ren in your... love-making?" he said the last words very quietly. 

When he put it like that, Kit was mortified. "No! No - we weren't... doing that exactly. It had gone no further than what you saw..." she attempted to reassure. Did he want her to outright say that Ren had not yet claimed her wholly? 

He peered down at her through concerned brows, probably wondering why they were even discussing something so improper. Seeing that this conversation was rendering them both uncomfortable, he let out a sigh and any other expression was replaced by genuine warmth. 

"You need not worry - I shall not tell anyone. Though I despise Ren with my very being... I do not wish to see you implicated in scandal." 

That was not how she thought this would go. It was that easy? 

But then she remembered when he had saved her from scandal back in Arkanis; he had every opportunity to tell the dinner party of how they met while she was alone in her nightclothes - but he had not. It seemed the General had a streak of chivalry within him that Kit had been blind to. 

"You... really will not speak a word of this? Even to the Colonel?"

He snorted. "I do not wish for him to be concerned by his superior courting his cousin. He would be insufferable at tea time."

She laughed heartily, feeling a weight slip from her shoulder. 

Hux continued, "But I must advise you to exercise caution; Ren is still a dangerous man. And he can be unpredictable. I must admit that I question your choice of lover."

Kit knew where Hux was coming from, but he had only ever seen the Commander side of Ren. The vicious, powerful leader who had won battles and fought thousands. She had seen through all that armour, and got to know the man underneath. And she had found him to be passionate and loving. She unknowingly toyed with the ruby necklace he had given her as she thought about him. 

Electing to ignore his most recent comments, Kit was overcome with elation - both at her new position and his promise to maintain her secret. She regarded Hux finally, wishing she could brush that strands of red out of his eyes.  "Thank you, Armitage."

That was the first time she had used his name since the ball. And he seemed to realise that; for his mouth opened slightly but he said nothing. 

Choosing this as the moment to take her leave, Kit was about to head for the exit but remembered something. "Oh! Before I forget, I need to give you this," she said, digging through her satchel to find the item in question. "I hope you don't mind the alterations, but I thought it was the least I could do after... everything." Her sentence trailed off towards the end as she brandished a folded greatcoat. 

At first, he looked at her quizzically before realisation dawned on him. He slowly took the item from her hands, cradling the garment as if it were precious. "My coat?" 

"The very same. Thank you for loaning it to me," she said shyly, inching her way to the door. 

He was starstruck. 

For nearly half a minute, all the General could do was stare at it. 

Not knowing what to do, Kit seized her chance. "Well, I need to be heading to the med tent-"

She was nearly out the door before he interrupted. 

"Thank you, Kit. For this kind gesture."

She gave him a small smile and tried to hide the blush at his words. That validation felt wonderful. 

He returned the sentiment; crows feet crinkling as he grinned at her.

"Goodbye, Armitage."

And she was gone. 

---

Holding the coat to its full length, Hux took in the small needlework patches that now littered the grey fabric. Those holes had been sustained over many years, spanning back to when he entered the academy. Though it had been the standard issue uniform for a first year trainee then, he had kept it all these years out of pure sentimentality. And as useless as he was with a needle, had never got around to repairing it.

Nowadays, his position as General afforded him the black coats reserved for the highest ranking officials. But he always found that they lacked the comfort of his original garment. 

In all honesty, he had believed it lost to him forever. Yet that night at the lake, part of him felt assured that it was in the care of the strange girl. How was he to know that their paths would cross again?

As he slid his arms through the woolen sleeves, he caught a familiar scent lingering on the fabric; it was her. 

The sudden intrusion on his senses caused him to inhale slowly, savouring the comforting feeling that it brought him. 

In this moment of peace, he noticed a foreign feeling in his left sleeve. Peering down into the dark lining, he could make out some brightly coloured needlework.

With red thread, the initials 'A.H' had been embroidered in cursive script. 

He was speechless once more.

What was she doing to him?

Notes:

This chapter was getting too choppy, so I've put some of it into the next one - so sorry if that ending seemed abrupt!

Now that we've had a deeper look into her fears of having a family, how do you think Ren will react? And what exactly is going on with Hux?

Next chapter is gonna get juicy so stick around!

Chapter 14: Prisoner

Blessed with several days of well needed rest and good weather, the 22nd Regiment had finally made their way into the thicketed forests and lush valleys of Nabooshire. Situated further south than Kit had ever ventured, the air appeared warmer and the sunlight hours felt longer. Not to mention that spring was nearly upon them. 

Their campsite had been selected due to its strategic height above the surrounding forest, allowing them view of the whole valley below. As the last rays of light were filtering over the tops of the lofty pine trees so prevalent throughout the landscape, Kit could not help but admire the view before her. The topography was so vastly different to the mossy moorland of Arkanis, and while she had come to learn to admire the gloomy charm, the exotic greenery that now surrounded her held a different sort of beauty. Where Arkanis felt hushed and dreary, Nabooshire was full and bursting with life. 

It was a well needed change, she decided. Like a splash of cold water to the face, her new surrounds heightened her senses and revitalised her spirits. 

Life had been moving at a break-neck speed recently and Kit felt it wash over her in an instant. In the past month alone she had been promoted to head nurse, ventured further from home than ever before, made peace with Hux, and even dared to hope that she might have a future with Ren. 

These notions excited her, and for a rare moment, Kit was utterly happy. Though, her present task had been sure to shatter that feeling. 

"He is still alive?"

"Yes. Barely, but the General has asked that we see to his wounds - lest he succumb to them." 

"Cousin, from what some of the men said, I had expected his corpse to be bloodied and lying in a ditch somewhere in Corellia" Kit said gravely. She could scarcely believe Mitaka's words. 

It had been some time since the attack on the camp by the lone archer in question, so why had Ren allowed him to live? 

She had a thought. "Has he not provided any detail on the Resistance?"

Mitaka grimaced. "I don't know how he did it. Ren went at him for hours... no luck."

She had seen her lover in action; he towered over all other men and was a force of pure strength. So often relegated to the side lines of battle in his role as Commander, it was a rare but frightening sight to see him sweep through the battlefield with the power of ten men. So to be able to withstand such a man - it was unfathomable. 

"Does Ren know about this?" the gestured to herself and the tent they were standing in front of. 

Mitaka shook his head. "The General thought it best if we saw to this matter... discreetly. As head nurse, we hope that we can count on your discretion from Ren and the others. It's just better this way."

"You're asking me to lie?"

He looked disheartened at that. "We're asking you to recognise that even the enemy deserves dignity. Ren would have you leave him decaying as he is; Hux and I believe this man has the right to a meal and some medical attention."

She felt an odd sense of shame at his words. An upbringing in one of the most loyalist counties had essentially erased her ability to exercise empathy for the supposed enemy. But knowing that within that tent was just another solider among thousands, bloodied and bruised and probably missing home. When she thought of it that way, it made sense. How could she be so heartless?

"I see. And if the Commander does find out?"

Her cousin hesitated for a moment. "I do not think he will punish you. He is... oddly fond of you, I have come to notice. Though I am unsure why - you hardly speak to him."

That sent heat straight to Kit's cheeks. Had Mitaka caught on? He had of course seen them dance back in Arkanis, but since then they had been so sure to be careful in their interactions. 

She longed for the day they no longer had to hide their courtship. Just once, she'd like to be able to proclaim her adoration for him publicly, and even hold his hand while others watched on. Ideally, she would not have to wait too long - though there were still so many things she needed to tell Ren - particularly surrounding her feelings towards motherhood. 

"I shall have to take your word for it, Dopheld."

Nodding, the Colonel drew back the door of the tent and allowed Kit inside. "Well, good luck then. If he should try to harm you, simply call out. I have men stationed all around." 

With that final piece of instruction, he returned to his post and left her alone. Taking the small med kit and the plate of food from the table, she entered into the interior chamber. 

The first thing Kit noticed was how dark the tent was. With only a single oil lamp dangling from the ceiling, harsh shadows were cast upon all surfaces of the structure and only broken up by the warm lighting of the flame. As she drew deeper into the room, she noticed a sturdy wooden beam holding the centre of the tent skywards. And chained to the base of it, sat a man. 

She did not know what she expected him to look like, but it wasn't this. With his head hung low and arms secured behind his back, he looked... helpless. Nothing like the ruthless, invincible warrior her mind had conjured; he reminded her more of a animal caged in a zoo, but even they were afforded more liberty than this poor soldier. 

While she could not make out the extent of his face due to mop of dark hair covering it, she could discern a profusion of red gashes planted across the rest of his exposed skin. With his navy Resistance uniform torn in several places, his chest was visible underneath and seemed to possess the most damage. He seemed to gleam with sweat - possibly the only sign that he was still living, for Kit had not seen him breathe once since she laid eyes on him. 

What had Ren done to him? She had seen patients injured in war look better than he was now. It served as a reminder of what the Commander was capable of, and it secretly frightened her. Was this the cause and the man that she had dedicated herself to?

She was startled from her observations when the prisoner suddenly spat on the ground, leaving a small puddle of blood and saliva before him. Then he seemed to look up slightly. 

"'M sorry. Shouldn't do that in front of a lady."

He could talk. Good - that discounted any brain injury. 

With some effort, he raised his eyes to meet hers. Brown. Nearly black. They seemed to stare right through Kit and squeeze her heart with the depth of sadness they held. Some internal instinct was screaming at her to comfort him, hold him like a lost child. But then she remembered he was the enemy, and had tried to blow up their camp several days before. 

As she continued to remain silent, he kept staring at her. Those eyes trailed across her face, back and forth over her features. 

"You look awfully familiar," he grinned - seeming to delight in her discomfort. It must have pained him, she realised, as his lip was split in several places and his nose seemed out of place. Still, she could recognise that he had a charming face underneath it all. 

"Never mind. Normally I'd shake your hand, but I'm a bit uh... preoccupied at the moment," he said as he strained against the chains. 

Was he trying to make a joke? She wondered if in another life he may have got on well with Mitaka. 

When Kit once more said nothing, he let out a sigh. "Looks that bad, huh?"

This earned him a twitch of a smirk from Kit, but she instantly hid it. She was not supposed to engage with the enemy. 

"C'mon, I'm all tied up here - you can be honest."

She considered him for a moment. "It looks that bad."

He let out what sounded like a chuckle, though it was strained and faint. "Wow. You really know how to make a guy feel better."

Now she was smiling. "That's my job."

"Yeah? Remind me to put in a good word with the boss."

He was good. A smooth talker. Probably thought he could flirt his way out of this. Though after not seeing Ren for some time, she did not mind the attention - but she would not be swayed by it.

"I'm not sure the boss is overly fond of you," Kit commented as she opened her med kit and retrieved a small towel. 

"Well, the feeling's mutual at least."

Coming to sit before him, Kit dipped the cloth in a medicinal solution and lifted it to his face. 

"This is going to sting." 

With one hand on his forehead, she drew back his sweaty curls to reveal a large gash that seared from his left temple to the arch of his eyebrow. She pressed the cloth lightly to the wound and felt his body immediately tense at the sensation. 

He sucked in a quick breath through gritted teeth and tried not to groan. "You weren't kidding."

Though the cut was not deep enough to warrant stitches, Kit wiped away the dried blood and muck that could cause infection. It looked as though he had not washed for at least a fortnight - which was probably the reality given the conditions he had been kept in while imprisoned. 

"So uh, you got a name?"

As she worked the grime from his cheeks, she contemplated showing him this one mercy. How long had it been since he had an actual conversation that did not result in injury to his person?

"Kit."

"Kit. That your real name or a nickname?"

"...nickname. It's short for Katherine."

"Hm, that's nice. Real pretty."

She quirked an eyebrow at him, wondering if he was aware how obvious he was being. 

She sighed, "And what about you?"

He hesitated as she dabbed a cut at his jawline. "Poe. Not short for anything. Just Poe."

There was silence for a while. As Kit applied salve to his lip, she noticed that his body started to relax. He must have finally let the act drop, because his smile was replaced with a look of exhaustion. 

"Why am I still here?" His voice was now riddled with sadness. 

She paused. Why was he here? Ren's attempts at torture had proved unsuccessful, and from the looks of it Poe was not willing to break anytime soon. It was inhumane in Kit's eyes. Was he just here to die and be made an example of?

"I... I don't know. I think they still want answers."

He scoffed. "Well I don't have what they're looking for. I've been in the field for months - I don't even know where our troops are stationed."

She could only look on in pity. Now that his wounds were all cleaned up, she could give him some food. 

The bread was stale at best, but it was likely the only thing he'd eaten in days. As she broke a piece off and offered it to him, he accepted hungrily and ate quickly as his fatigued body would allow. 

He swallowed it down with large gulps of water from the bowl she held to his mouth. 

"Thank you, for doing this," he whispered sincerely. 

She dabbed the water from the corner of his lips. 

"I rarely question the decisions of the Order... but this..." she trailed off. 

He looked at her again, creasing his brows. He motioned for her to come closer so he could whisper. 

"We could escape. Run away tonight. The Resistance would be understanding once I told them you helped me." 

His face was close to hers now and she could see the pleading in his eyes. He really meant it. Just the mention of deserting could have her arrested and him killed. And he was risking it all because he thought he could trust her. 

She took a step back, slowly shaking her head. That glimmer of hope fizzled from his expression in an instant. "I can't... I'm so sorry - you don't deserve this... but I just can't."

He seemed to nod in acknowledgement, eyes glazed over in despair.

"But I promise I'll be back. I'll bring food, I promise."

Another sad smile. "I'll hold you to that, Kit."

Ending on that note, she packed away her supplies and left the tent. She had much to think on. 

---

As several days passed with no conflict, Kit could feel a sense of unease brewing within the regiment. They had been promised combat upon nearing the Resistance base, but still they remained in camp. Kit of course did not mind, as she was feeling overcome by an increasing sense of pacifism the longer this war drew on. 

While Poe was only a prisoner - loyal to the enemy - she could not help but feel sorry for his condition. With each subsequent day spent in his company dressing wounds and feeding him, Kit was startled by how casually they fell into conversation - almost as if her lover was not holding him captive and intent on torturing him until he breathed his last breath. It was alarming how deeply she felt the need to help him; it had her questioning why she was even here in the first place. Of her love for nursing, she was sure - but was the First Order simply a vessel for it? Did she even know what they stood for? 

If her father - the best man she ever knew - had dedicated his life to it, than surely it was the right choice. Though she had been alive during the change of power, Kit could not remember what rule under the old queen was like, so she supposed she never had anything to compare it to. 

She thought for a moment and realised then that her whole life was so deeply entrenched in the existence of the First Order: Dany was married to a retired official, her father served as a colonel, Jayne was all but engaged to the new colonel, and she herself was entangled with the Commander. Even if she were to question her loyalties, how could she just abandon them all now?

As she set about her morning duties, these ideas of morality sent her into a spiral of self doubt and contemplation. So caught up in it all, Kit failed to notice a presence enter the med tent behind her. 

When someone grabbed her sides and squeezed, she let out a high pitched squeak and immediately turned on her attacker.

"Whoa! Easy there Kit - it's just me," laughed Rey. 

Heart beating out her chest, Kit took several shaky breaths to calm herself before lowering the empty bedpan she had unknowingly grabbed as a weapon. "You startled me," she rebutted.

"Just lucky I wasn't the Commander. Could've landed yourself in hot water if you were found assaulting him with a bedpan," Rey said through a fit of giggles. What had her in such a good mood?

"Well, I will endeavour not to assault anyone with a bedpan - especially the Commander."

"Speaking of, have you heard the news?" she asked slyly. 

No she had not heard any news. Surely if it were something of importance, he would have told her first, in confidence.

"Do tell," Kit encouraged, trying to mask her heightened interest. 

"Well, Finn and I just happened to be in the mess tent the same time as the Commander and the Colonel. Don't tell anyone, but they've located the base of the Resistance forces in the next town over - in D'Qarshire." 

It had been rumoured for some time that D'Qarshire had been host to Resistance conspirators, but this had mostly been disregarded as myth. So to have such a suspicion confirmed was surprising. 

"Really? What are their sources?" she queried. 

"That is the part that surprised me; when Phasma was being evacuated to the hospital in town, the officers escorting her overheard the rebels conspiring in the room adjacent - discussing plans to meet with Organa at the very base in question."

It sounded straight from the pages of a sensation story she read in her youth. 

"Oh. So I suppose that this will be the next destination for the regiment? Maybe the last, if it is successful?" Though her words were hopeful, her tone betrayed her. If the Resistance were unaware of this knowledge, it would be an all out slaughter. 

Rey seemed hesitant to answer. The nurse must have recognised an emotion from Kit that wasn't the excitement she had come to expect when discussing First Order victories. 

She seemed to dismiss whatever it was she had scrutinised from Kit's odd behaviour. 

"Anyway, to make the official announcement and whatnot, they're throwing an army ball in town. Supposed to boost morale, too."

"A ball?" 

"Yes Kit. Dancing, drinking - do I need go on?"

"I know what a ball is, Rey," she deadpanned, "but it is a bit early to be celebrating - is it not? What do we even wear?"

Rey chuckled. "Zali brought her entire wardrobe with her. I'm sure she'll have something."

Kit sighed. The last ball she attended had been back in Arkanis and it was... eventful to say the least. This would be the first ball without her sisters there. Self absorbed and impertinent as they may be at times, she longed for their company even just for a moment. Though simultaneously her greatest adversaries and admirers, they still held a dear place in her heart that at present remained unfilled. And for the first time since joining up, Kit considered returning to her rainy little county on the other side of the country. 

This would be good for her - a chance to let loose a little. Pretend that life was normal and she was not an adversary to the deaths of anyone unfortunate enough to find themselves allied with the wrong side. 

She had made her bed, and now it was time to lie in it. 

"So when is it?"

"They haven't officially announced anything, but it has been scheduled for tomorrow night."

So soon. Well, best get it over with. 

She put on a smile. "I look forward to it immensely."

 

Notes:

Sorry there's no Ren or Hux in this one, but it was necessary to explore how Kit's opinions of the First Order are changing. But what will this mean for her and Ren? Find out next time when we re-visit the dancefloor!

Chapter 15: Green Green Dress

Notes:

Alrighty, we've got another long one - clocking in at just over 5800 words!! Enjoy!

Green had always been a favourite of Kit's. From her old bedroom window in Colonel House, she would watch as the weeks of late summer rain turned the fields from a light, yellowish green into a deeper almost emerald hue. Even the mossy façade of Canady Hall held some beauty in her eyes, and she particularly loved the aging green of the vines that accompanied it. She had mourned the day the servants cleared them away; revealing the dark brick that served as a constant reminder of the uniformity and discipline represented by the First Order. 

Standing before the mirror, Kit smoothed the bodice of the gown she borrowed from Zali - the shade of green reminiscent of the lush forests they were currently surrounded by. The fabric was a soft satin that reflected the light deliciously, though the single candle in the tent did it little justice. It was nothing like her plain muslins back in Arkanis; and the cut certainly revealed far more than she was used to. While not overly scandalous by society's standards, Kit could not help but notice the way the garment seemed to display the full swell of her breasts. As a somewhat larger girl than the dress's owner, Kit's chest pulled taught on the fabric and every breath she took highlighted this fact. But despite her hesitance, she could admit she looked good.

And she knew a certain Commander who would be particularly appreciative of her chosen attire. 

"Save some officers for the rest of us," teased Rey, currently pinning her hair back in the style popular in Nabooshire. 

Kit chuckled to herself. If only she knew. 

"Can't make any promises," Kit smirked back, enjoying the sense of confidence the flattering dress provided. "I wonder if Officer Finn will save me a dance," she added, looking to Rey for a reaction. She was met with a deadpan look that melted away into a smile. 

"Oh ha ha," Rey said sarcastically. "He might have room for one dance, but I can guarantee the rest of the slots are unavailable," she wiggled her eyebrows. 

"Get a room," Zali teased as she crossed the space in search of her missing earring. Kit thought it odd that one would bring several pairs of earrings while stationed with the regiment, but she was not complaining when Zali had single-handedly saved her from wearing her nurse uniform to the ball. 

"And who will you be dancing with, Zali?" asked Rey. 

Zali flashed a wicked grin, "Oh I have been starving for a ball for so long, I will dance with the first man I lay my eyes on. I would not even care if the General asked me."

That made the other girls laugh, seemingly finding the thought of dancing with Hux quite hilarious. Kit faked a smile, but she could not see the humour in the statement. 

"He's not that bad, you know. Yes, he can come off a bit arrogant to start with, but once he loosens up, he's actually quite... pleasant to be around." Kit looked away and pulled on a pair of white elbow-length gloves. 

"Is he now?" asked Rey with heightened interest. "So you wouldn't mind dancing with him?" 

"...I would not," admitted Kit. 

The others were a bit stunned for a moment. 

"Well then," Rey broke the silence, "we had best get going. I think Finn and the Colonel are waiting outside for us."

---

As they stepped into the cool night air, Kit clutched her shawl closer to her frame and inhaled the scent of the evening. She decided then that once this war was over, she would have to revisit Nabooshire. 

Presently checking the time on his silver pocket watch, Mitaka stood dressed in his ceremonial colonel's uniform. In the past weeks of no combat, she had only seen him sporting his white undershirt and slacks, so it felt out of place to see him so dressed up. From the look on his face when he spotted her, he must have had a similar thought. 

He gave a low whistle. "You ladies clean up nicely." 

Zali blushed and Rey and Kit both rolled their eyes at his antics. She knew he only had eyes for one girl. 

"You're not half bad either, cousin. Love what you've done with your hair," she offered slyly, motioning to the slicked back style he was sporting. Any hint of a curl had been drenched in some sort of gel that gave it a slightly wet look - as if he had just bathed. 

"Trying something new," Mitaka said a little nervously, as he made to slick it back even more. 

Rey suddenly looked around. "Where's Finn? I was promised a personal escort to the ball."

"I saw him not an hour ago - he's probably in his tent," suggested Mitaka. Knowing Finn's somewhat forgetful nature, the group determined that they would locate him themselves, rather than wait for him to appear.

Wandering closer to the officers' quarters, the three of them split up to try and spot their companion. As they passed by other officers readying for the evening, Kit found herself walking by the tent Poe was being kept in. 

While the others continued on, she lingered behind.

Kit recalled his suggestion of escaping. Though she had refused, why did his offer still stick in her mind? Tonight would be the ideal time - everyone would be at the ball for several hours. Maybe she could just check in on him? She knew he would be sure to give her dress a compliment. 

As Kit neared the entrance, she heard sounds from within. They were voices. One was deep and raspy - obviously Poe's. But there was another. It was awfully familiar, but she couldn't place it. 

She couldn't go in now, that much was sure. She was bound to raise suspicion if she were to try and patch some wounds in full evening attire. 

Moving just out of view from the tent, Kit watched from a distance. Seconds passed, and nothing happened. The exact conversation was indiscernible, but there was far too much talking from both parties for it to be about food. As she was about to re-join her companions, she saw the entrance to the tent open, and out stepped a man. 

It was Finn. 

Now hiding behind a crate, Kit hoped that he had not seen her. 

What had Finn been speaking to Poe about?

Kit thought that only the officials were even aware that he was alive. 

And it was definitely not protocol for him to be in there with the prisoner alone; the tent was out of bounds for officers. 

Could Finn be... no. Kit shook the thought from her mind. Finn could not be the spy; he had been so loyal and even got himself injured in battle serving the First Order. He had dedicated so much of his life to it - he wouldn't just throw it all away, would he? 

And besides, he surely would have freed Poe by now if they were allies. It would be wrong to let a friend be tortured for so long. 

As Kit reasoned with herself, Finn had made his way over to Rey and re-joined the others. She saw this as her cue to do so too, as they were already bound to be late for the first dance.

"Ah, that looks like everybody," Mitaka noted as Kit came to stand by Zali. 

She could not help glancing at Finn every now and then, trying to discern his motives. When he seemed to notice her attentions, she looked away instantly. He raised an inquisitive eyebrow at her, but she did not meet his eyes. 

Shrugging it off, Finn grasped Rey's hand and led the way, "Now let's go dancing!"

---

While living with the Regiment, Kit had almost forgotten that society existed. She found it freeing to be able to forget about the strict social rules she was expected to follow and the dress standards that women of her standing were held to. When she was with her fellow nurses and officers, those imaginary divides were broken and they were simply individuals with the common goal to serve the Order. 

So to now be within a brick building for the first time in months, surrounded by men and women in their evening finery, Kit immediately felt herself brought back into the reality which she had forgotten about. And while the ball had been intended for the Regiment, the townsfolk of Nabooshire were all too eager to attend the festivities. Besides, the small number of nurses meant that there would have been hardly enough ladies to dance with. 

Standing with her companions at the top of the steps, she fidgeted with her gloved fingers as they scoped out the scene. They had indeed arrived late, judging by the number of people in the hall presently engaged in a dance. 

At least there would be music tonight. Kit had dearly missed that, she could admit. She silently wondered if there was a pianoforte in another room that she could hide away and play. But unlike balls in previous years, tonight there was actually someone who wanted to dance with her. 

Reminding herself of this - and how good she looked tonight - Kit allowed her shawl to be taken by the doorman, instantly feeling the warmth of the hall surround her skin. She almost longed for the cool air of the evening. 

Ignoring the instinct to cover herself, she looked out onto the crowd with a false confidence that was uncharacteristic of her. While she did not want to be here, she looked for the individual who would make it all worth while.

The ballroom was a flurry of gowns and uniforms, with the rare evening suit sported by a gentleman from town. She knew that he would be wearing his ceremonial uniform; the one with the red sash that she had very fond memories of from the last time she saw it. 

As Finn led Rey into the crowd to join in the dance, Mitaka excused himself from Kit's side to fetch a much needed drink. He was set to make the official announcement of thanks to the officers for their commitment to the First Order sometime that evening, though he was aiming to put it off for as long as possible. He had supposedly decided to keep the true means for celebration confidential, and would relay the location of the Resistance base to his men at a more private occasion to ensure secrecy. 

At this moment, Zali seemed to have caught the attention of one of the townsfolk, and found herself practically whisked away to the other side of the floor. So now Kit was left alone, scouring the crowd for Ren. Surely his height would make him stand out, but for all her efforts she could not see him. 

She noted the faces of some of the officers she had treated over the months, recalling how each of them had thanked her for her efforts in their moments of need. But in this setting they were no longer past patients of hers, but young unmarried men - and there were rules for her to follow if she wished to interact with them. 

Dismayed at Ren's failure to appear, Kit straightened her posture and kept her head forward. Though she thought tonight may have been different, she resigned herself to spending this ball the way she had spent so many in Arkanis; perched against the wall, people watching for the entire evening. 

Sticking to the sides of the ballroom, Kit filtered through the throng of people until she had nearly reached the back wall. A delectable looking piece of cake had caught her eye, and she was considering whether to take one or two slices when someone sidled up beside her. 

"I take it that your Commander failed to attend," came the accented voice.

Whirling around in a blur of skirts, Kit came face to face with Hux - dressed in a sleek, black uniform not too dissimilar from Ren's ceremonial garb, bar the red sash. Her mind warned her that they were in proper society now, and she should subscribe to the etiquette expected of her. She should not hold private discussions with him without the presence of a chaperone, and she certainly should not speak of anything vulgar. 

But when she saw his teasing smirk and looked into those eyes - almost the exact shade of green she was wearing - those notions left her mind immediately. He was a friend. There was no hiding that - and to pretend any differently would be cruel. Etiquette be damned. 

She returned his smile genuinely, glad to have some company to wait out the rest of this night with. "I'm sure he has his reasons. There's this thing called the war that he's currently overseeing. You might have heard of it."

He chuckled, taking a sip from his glass to follow it down. "I could have you arrested for that attitude, you know" he threatened jokingly. Kit made a face of false shock, playing into it. "But I fear you would not survive long in prison; this dress is far too fine."

Had he just tried to compliment her?

"You... you like the dress?" she asked nervously, looking down at the flowing fabric. 

Hux seemed to do the same, and it did not escape her notice the way his gaze lingered leisurely on her bust as he appraised the garment. 

Snapping his eyes away, he stuttered for a moment. "Uh, yes - yes it suits your form very well." He winced. "Let me start over; you look very nice this evening, Miss Vara."

She truly tried to contain her laughter, but it escaped her control when he looked up to her after his attempt at complimenting her. "You always did have a way with words, didn't you General?" she said through giggles. 

Placing his drink on the nearby table, Hux turned back to her and shook his head in embarrassment - though she could spy a the small smirk he was sporting. 

"Don't remind me," he said with a sigh, before looking out onto the dancefloor. The flurried movements appeared to have ceased, and the couples were breaking apart to entertain some discussion before the music began once more. He turned back to her, and she could sense from his expression that he was thinking very deeply about something. Finally he spoke. "Now, I fear to ask this question again lest I am met with the same response as last time - so please be gentle in your rejection: may I request your company for the next dance?"

Yes, her mind answered almost immediately. 

The speed at which her consciousness found his offer appealing was startling. What was it she had told him last time? I am simply not in the mood. 

How arrogant she had been! 

To see him now, hand outstretched and not a hint of animosity in his actions, was a sight she was sure to cherish for years to come. He even held an expression that suggested he was somewhat eager to dance with her - it was not just out of politeness or obligation.

Placing her gloved hand in his, she gave it a gentle squeeze to show that his enthusiasm was reciprocated. "Of course. For you see, I am very much in the mood."

For a split second, she saw a look of relief wash over his features - quickly replaced by a warm happiness that needed no words to be communicated. 

The musicians at the side of the room rustled through their sheet music, selecting the next piece. As they took up their playing positions once more, Hux led Kit to the dancefloor, standing several couples down from Rey and Finn. Looking down the row of ladies, she made eye contact with the nurse in question, and Rey gave a somewhat surprised but proud look to Kit who just shook her head. 

"Ready?" he whispered. 

"Ready."

The violinists began at once. So out of practice, Kit nearly missed the first step, but she quickly fell into sync with the others around her. 

Circling around her partner as was required, she silently relished in the way her gown flowed with the movement. She felt as though she were floating across the floor like a ghostly spirit.

"Do you recognise it?" he asked her as they joined the backs of their hands and moved away before re-joining them once more. 

She looked at him perplexed, having to wait until they were face to face once more after taking the girl's hand next to her and forming a line. "What exactly?" she asked.

As she skipped back in his direction she saw him nod in the direction of the musicians. The piece was familiar in her mind, and when she concentrated, she could almost imagine herself tapping out the same notes on the pianoforte. She knew this piece well, in fact. 

"Oh! It is 'Lilies of the Valley' is it not?. I am so used to hearing it as a piano arrangement that I could not place it."

Both her hands were in his now as they stepped from side to side. 

"Correct," he affirmed, then looked away almost shyly. "In fact, it is the piece that we played together the evening of Mitaka's dinner party." 

That admission hung in the air for a while, as Kit thought back to that evening. Yet all she could seem to recall was how he had left so abruptly after their duet... and how well he had played.

At the conclusion of the first dance, they retreated to the table of canapes and indulged in the first meal for moths that was not stew or porridge. Both seemed to delight in this small comfort and neither made comment about the sheer quantity of food the other ate. Hux had even secretly snuck Kit an additional honey cake once she had (falsely) proclaimed that she could not eat another. 

As the night drew on and Ren still had not made an appearance, some wine and light conversation followed while they mingled with the other officers and the townsfolk of Nabooshire. Unlike the people of Arkanis, those from town were merely obligate supporters, rather than the extreme loyalists Kit had grown up around.  It was a refreshing change, and almost allowed her to forget that they were in the midst of a war. 

Having socialised with others enough for one night, Kit and Hux elected to partake in one more dance - though this time the piece was entirely unknown to them. 

For some time, they danced in silence. But as the music was reaching its climax, they quickly fell back into conversation.  

"Armitage," he perked up at her use of his name, "my pride was too great to admit it then, but you really were quite remarkable that night that you played. I had always wondered, where did you learn? I assume you didn't have a governess standing over your shoulder to instruct you," Kit chuckled. 

While he grinned at her compliment, it did not meet his eyes. There was something more behind them. 

"My mother taught me, actually. Said that no son of hers would go through life without knowing some Bach."

This surprised Kit. All she had known of his upbringing was that most of it was spent at the academy. He had never mentioned his actual family. Now she was intrigued. 

"What is she like?" Kit asked.

He looked up at her. "She was... kind, I remember, and she loved me very dearly. She's who I have to thank for the red hair," he smiled fondly. 

"Was?" Kit asked with some trepidation. Maybe she was getting in too deep. 

He let out a sigh. "She passed during my time at the academy."

"Oh Armitage, I'm so sorry."

"It's alright. Happened such a long time ago now... Sorry to bring the mood down."

Kit gave a reassuring squeeze of his hand as they continued to dance. "You were just a boy. Was your father there to comfort you at least?"

He scoffed lightly at that. "During his pathetic time on this Earth, Brendol Hux was never one for conversation - let alone comfort. Do you know, he did not even acknowledge my existence as his son for the first seven years of my life?" He laughed darkly. "I was but a walking reminder of his... indiscretions."

The dance had reached its conclusion by now, yet the pair of them were so engrossed in the conversation that they moved onto the balcony to continue it with more privacy. 

"I... I do not know what to say," Kit stuttered out. While her heart was reeling for him, she did not wish to overstep the blurred boundaries they were walking. 

With a more positive tone, he began again, "Then tell me this; does it shock you to learn that your General is illegitimate? A bastard?"

She could see that he was trying to make a joke of it - to make her smile. But it was entirely too self-deprecating for Kit's liking; she did not wish to laugh at the expense of her friend. 

"It is certainly surprising. I take it that is why I had not heard of you amongst Arkanis society?"

He nodded confirmation. "I never actually lived there - Arkanis was my father's birthplace but even he did not reside in the county for long. I spent those few years before the academy with my mother in the north. She had family in the highlands." 

Kit could see it more clearly now - his northern features. All sharp cheekbones and carved jawline, he was missing the more rounded features that southerners usually possessed. And of course the fiery red hair was a giveaway. 

After these unexpected confessions from Hux, Kit could feel him trying to draw away now - almost as if he felt as though he had tarnished himself in her eyes. 

As he went to fetch a drink, Kit stopped him by his arm. "Armitage, I hope you know that you telling me this does not change my opinion of you."

"Which is?"

Kit sighed. Now was as good a time as ever. "That you put on a tough exterior; you do not want others to know you - the real you. But you should know that I have come to enjoy the company of the real you, despite our rocky start," she chuckled. "I care little for your family name or rank - just know that I value our friendship, and... I see you." 

She did not have to think on those words very much at all, for they had been bubbling inside her ever since she started to peel back the curtain of his façade. And though she believed there was likely still more to go, even a glimpse into the real Armitage Hux showed that at his core he was a good man. 

Often guarded and measured in her emotions, such an admission from Kit was a rare occurrence. She did not think she had even been this genuine with Ren - though their actions together spoke for themselves. This was her turn to be vulnerable, and she waited with creased brows for Hux's response. 

He stayed staring at the ground for some time. She did not know when his hands had found hers again, but she was reminded of their presence as he gently rubbed his thumb over her knuckle through their gloves. This felt almost... intimate. 

He had not met her eyes yet, but he began to speak softly. "Katherine, there is something I must tell you."

She tilted her head to the side to hopefully meet his gaze. It worked, as he looked up at her now, with an almost pained expression. 

"Yes, Armitage?" 

"Kitty," came a clipped baritone voice from the entrance of the balcony. 

Wrenching his hands from hers, Hux turned to their intruder and scowled. 

"Am I interrupting something?" the Commander asked, stepping in place between Kit and Hux. 

Somewhat caught off guard, Hux ran a hand through his immaculately styled hair and breathed deeply. "No. Not at all. I was about to take my leave; it is time for the Colonel to make his speech."

Normally Hux would have offered some sort of scathing remark, but his countenance now seemed like a dog who had just been kicked. She would inquire after him at a later time. 

"Farewell, General," she offered, giving him a small smile as he departed. He merely gave a nod in acknowledgement before he disappeared back into the flurry of the hall. 

It was now just her and Ren.

Quite some time had passed since they had been alone together, and Kit could not help but feel a twinge of unease as the silence settled between them in the frigid evening darkness. 

"I, uh, was hoping that you'd come," Kit offered, to bridge the divide. 

It seemed to do the job, for he practically melted at the sound of her voice. 

"Well, I couldn't miss seeing you in this dress. I am altogether too envious of every man who has had the privilege of looking upon you tonight."

She was blushing now, and before she knew it, Ren had cradled her into a tight embrace as he had become so fond of doing. 

It was fortunate that the balcony was shielded from the rest of the hall, lest they be interrupted. 

Those inside appeared to be gathering now, likely listening to Mitaka's speech of thanks to his men. Kit had intended on hearing it, but her Commander had other plans. 

"What were you and the General discussing?" Ren asked. 

It would do no good lying to him, so Kit elected to tell the truth. "He was telling me about his father. He... did not sound like a pleasant man."

Ren huffed. "In that you are correct. I was never fond of him - neither was your father, actually."

"He knew my father?"

"They were stationed together occasionally." 

"Oh." And that was all Kit would get on the subject. She would be sure to ask Hux when she saw him next. 

"I saw Phasma today. She is healing, but may still lose the leg," Ren said seemingly out of nowhere. Were they this domesticated that they could now share any detail of their day with such casualness?

"I had wondered how she was faring. Maybe I'll go visit sometime."

He hummed in acknowledgement. "I was actually on my way back from the palace when I saw her; I met with Snoke."

She pulled back from him to gauge his reaction. He was strangely docile. Must have been good news. 

"I take it the meeting went well?" she offered. 

Ren took a deep breath. "He officially named me heir."

Though Kit had always known this to be true, hearing it confirmed was a startling shot of reality. 

Kylo Ren would be the next king. 

She tried to put on a happy face, but her mind was instead drawn to the overheard conversation all those weeks ago; what was his relation to the old queen?

"Kitty, did you hear what I just said?" Ren asked, the tone riddled with concern. 

"I did, I did. It's just... I have heard a distressing rumour of your... connections with the old dynasty..." She could tell she was now treading on very thin ice from his darkening expression. "I just wondered if they held any truth or if I have been subject to a lie."

He took a step back from her, putting in place both a physical and emotional distance. "I am not ashamed of my past - though it appears you think me to be. Normally I would not reward such insolence with an answer, but because I love you I will indulge you," he said almost scathingly. Ren's face was stone cold now, and he cleared his throat as if his next words held a large weight to them. "I was born Prince Ben Solo; son of Queen Leia Organa and King Consort Han Solo." He paused. "But Ben Solo died the day of the revolution."

Kit's mind was sent into overdrive upon hearing his confession. All the tales of the revolution had said that the prince was killed along with his father. She tried to steady her breathing and maintain a neutral expression. 

"What do you mean?" Kit asked softly. 

"I killed him - along with Han Solo," he said the name through gritted teeth. "Then under the leadership of Snoke, I was reborn Kylo Ren." 

He raised his arms wide, as if to show her what he had become. He was a prince by birth, but he had earned the place of Commander through the slaughter of his father and overthrowing his mother. Her loyalist upbringing was screaming that she should have no remorse for anyone affiliated with the old dynasty and the Resistance - but he had killed the very man that raised him.

"So that is why Snoke anointed you as heir?"

"Poetic, isn't it? I was always destined for power... and now it would appear, so are you."

Her eyes went wide. What did he mean?

"M-me? What did you tell Snoke?"

Kylo grinned, stepping forward and placing his hands on her waist. He gently rubbed his fingers along the seam of her gown, leering openly at her breasts which were now heaving with her quickened breaths. Now was not the time for this. 

"Ren," she tried again, attempting to snap him out of his trance. 

His eyes flicked to her, with pupils dilated and telling of his desire. "As revered a leader as he is, Snoke has borne no natural heirs. And while I am honoured to hold the title of his successor, I will not make the same mistake," he held her waist tighter, "I will have heirs."

Kit swallowed the bile that had risen in her throat. She had dreaded this - this expectation of motherhood that all women faced. Why had she thought herself any different? 

Could she even protest, this far in? She considered if he could be reasoned with, but there was a determined look in his eye that told her there was no stopping him from achieving his ambitions. Voicing her refusal to bear children would have unknown consequences - though it was likely Ren could have her position as a nurse compromised and she would be sent home. Whether or not their ventures would become public, Kit was unsure. 

As these thoughts raced about her mind, Kit kept reminding herself that this was coming from a place of love; Ren loved her enough to want a family with her. And while she knew this, she also knew that he would stop at nothing to get what he wanted. The image of Poe's beaten body flashed before her eyes - just one example of his capabilities.

Despite this, she needed her voice to be heard. 

"Ren, I do not wish to be a mother."

He seemed stunned by her blunt answer. "Is that hesitation I sense?"

"No, it is not hesitation - I have thought this over thoroughly; I do not want children."

His brows creased, almost as if confused that she would reject his offer. 

But then it was as if a switch had been flipped, for his expression morphed into one of amusement. Then he started to laugh.

"Oh hush, Kitty. I know it is a lot to ask of you so soon; I realise I have done this in the wrong order."

"But-"

"I would reject the proposition as well - without having the proper insurances in place."

"Insurances? Ren, I do not think you are list-" he cut in before she could finish.

"I believe that propriety dictates I offer you this before requesting that you carry my children." Kit looked down into Ren's hand, and sitting within it found a small box, open to an intricately crafted gold ring. Atop its centre, an ostentatiously large ruby was perched and haloed by another series of smaller but equally radiant diamonds. It was certainly something she would never choose for herself, but she was still awed by it regardless. 

"Kylo..."

 "I know I should have asked Canady's permission for your hand - but how could he refuse, after knowing how I have sullied you," he whispered seductively in her ear. The warmth of his breath provided a contrast to the air around them, sending goosebumps down her neck. But it was also the veiled threat that sent a shiver down her spine; he had been willing to expose her in order to ensure she would wed him. And while she could probably live with her reputation being destroyed, she feared the power he held. Save Snoke, there was no-one in the country who he answered to. He could do whatever he wanted, and she would be powerless. Knowing that the outcomes were the same, she had the decision to fight it, or go willingly. 

Just days ago, she had felt genuine love for this man. But it seemed he had revealed his true character in a matter of moments. Kit felt caged, like a bird. Those months of progress she had made in achieving her personal freedom had all been for naught. For now she found herself backed into a corner from which there was no escape.  

"Say that you will marry me and be my queen, Kitty," Ren commanded, as he knelt on one knee and removed the ring from its box.  

It was as if her soul had left her body. She could faintly hear Mitaka's voice echoing through the hall beside them, but the rest was drowned out by a high pitched ringing. Her body had entered into its most base survival instincts, telling Kit to focus and prepare to flee. 

But she had been caught in a trap to which there was no escape - and one she had so willingly walked into. Maybe this was her only chance at a future where she was wanted. 

It would do no good to delay the inevitable, so Kit looked down at him, with real tears in her eyes. To him, she looked every part the blushing girl excited to be proposed to. Smiling through her pain, her mouth twitched from being pulled too taughtly. 

"I will marry you," she whispered. But there was no emotion behind her words. 

Sliding the gaudy piece onto her ring finger, it was a perfect fit. Still on one knee, Ren kissed where he had just placed the ring.

She had expected him to meet her for an actual kiss, but instead he lingered at her abdomen. Removing his hands from hers, he came to cup the space on her stomach cradled by her pelvis. Resting his forehead against it, he placed a lingering kiss to the fabric of her skirt; she realised right where her womb would be. 

Kit was numb at this point. 

"And you will carry my heirs," he whispered into her.

A single tear slid down Kit's cheek.

 

Notes:

Soo what did you think?? Please please comment and let me know!

Did you expect that proposal so soon? I hope it wasn't too rushed, but we are at the critical turning point in the story and it just gets wilder from here!

Cya next time!

Chapter 16: True Colours

Notes:

Sorry this took so long to update! But I've split this chapter in half so you get two chapters in one day! Enjoy :)

She stood in her mother's room. Everything looked exactly as it always had; her perfumes littered across the vanity and the jewellery hung from the metallic stand. Even the book she had been reading lay open at her desk, with the page lightly dog-eared to hold her place in the story. If Kit thought hard enough, it was if her mother was still there - simply out for a day of shopping in town. 

This was a dream she revisited frequently. The moment her world had changed.

Her mother had not even left a note. Simply took her suitcase and fled in the night. 

As a younger Kit paced further into the room, clutching the baby doll that had been a gift from her mother, she searched for signs or any sort of clue that could explain why she had abandoned them. That last discussion her parents shared had sounded heated, and she wondered if her father was to blame. 

Maybe they both were. It didn't matter to Kit - whatever the reason, it had clearly outweighed her mother's love towards her children.

But as the reality of her new situation set in, Kit slumped down at the foot of her mother's bed and sat silently. 

She was never coming back. 

Kit held the doll at eye level. It was poor and defenceless; she was its only protector. As her young heart lurched for the little doll, Kit vowed then that she would never cause this much pain to one that she loved.  

Standing once more, she wiped the beginnings of tears from her eyes before placing the doll at the foot of the bed. Giving it one last glance, she shut the door behind her and left it for good. 

---

Kit's head throbbed. She had barely slept last night, in fact, the week following her engagement had been filled with countless sleepless nights. Yet last night was the worst of them all; haunted by the events that had transpired just prior as well as the dreams that followed. 

Standing under the sun, she felt her body sway uneasily from lack of sleep before she steadied herself once more and looked out onto the crowd. 

"Soldiers, today we make history! You have marched through the night, you have traversed all that nature has thrown at you. And today you shall be victorious and claim the Resistance stronghold as our own!"

Mitaka's war cry echoed off the outer walls of the fortress and caused Kit's ears to ring. Though the words were cliché, they were standard issue for the First Order. Having delivered a less impassioned version of it at the ball several evenings ago, the lines were spoken with a confidence and aura of command that Kit rarely saw from him. But after knowing him for nearly an entire year now, she had come to find that the strict and imposing manner was simply a façade that reappeared out of necessity for his job.

Their intel had been correct it would appear; Resistance troops had been spotted entering the gates at odd hours of the night, bringing with them enough supplies to sustain a small army. Such news had the 21st Regiment leaving Nabooshire at a break-neck speed, which saw their arrival to D'Qarshire within the week.  

As the rows of soldiers stood beneath the shadow of the old stone keep, Kit mused that it was a shame such an ancient piece of architecture was to be burnt down or reduced to rubble in a matter of hours - that is, if the Resistance put up enough of a fight. 

Silently, she prayed that they were willing to bargain with the First Order, to spare as many lives as possible. It crossed her mind that there were likely women and children within the walls as well, and they would prove the easier targets if it came down to it. But she knew her men - they would not stoop so low. But she also knew of their fierce loyalty and willingness to obey orders.

For not even an hour prior, Ren had announced that if the Resistance fought back, there were to be no prisoners taken. Kit could only assume this included the innocents. 

She shuddered at the thought of him; she had been avoiding Ren since the night of the engagement, unbeknownst to the impact that decision would have. Their contact had been limited to a chaste kiss to her forehead each night, before Kit dashed off claiming she had excess work to attend to. Where she had once treasured these interactions, they were now marred with a feeling of unease and paranoia. She was glad that he had decided to wait to announce their impending nuptials. 

Had she been of a stronger constitution, Kit may have been able to go straight to him and confess that this was not what she wanted. 

And she had very nearly tried to, just last night. 

After the adrenaline had left her system, Kit had had time to reflect on the situation she found herself in. Ladies refused proposals all the time - so she was well within her right to do so. Despite the veiled threats he had made of exposing their inappropriate actions, she reasoned that a life of shame was better than spending it with the wrong person. And as for the prospect of his unchecked power, Ren would never hurt her; he had told her so. 

So she had made up her mind to seek him out.

The soldiers had been trekking the entire day, and by sundown almost all had found themselves in the mess tent devouring whatever food the cooks had deigned edible for the evening. Kit had stowed away some pieces of bread and cheese that she would eat later, as this was her only opportunity to catch him alone. 

As she drew back the curtain of his tent, careful she was not followed, Kit found him sitting at his desk intently focused on a letter of decent size. The look of concentration would have been endearing to her under different circumstances, yet she shook that thought from her mind when she remembered why she was here. 

He seemed to notice a presence in his room, and finally looking up, Kit was met with a small smile that did not meet his eyes. She watched as his gaze travelled down her body and landed on her left hand; absent of her ring. 

"Oh. This is unexpected," he said emotionlessly, still fixated on her bare fingers.

Kit sighed nervously as she walked deeper into his room. "Yes, I suppose it is. There was something I wanted to talk to you about," she said in a tone that betrayed her hesitance. 

He seemed to take note, frowning first at the ground, then back up at her. He stared at her, unblinking and with something in his eyes that she had never seen before. Lolling his head to the side, he raised his brows as if to entice her to speak. When she froze on the spot, he crossed his arms and let out a slow sigh. "Well?"

He had never used that patronizing tone on her. She had to act now. Kit took a deep breath, "Kylo, please understand that what I am about to say is my decision, and nothing can be done to change it." 

That caught his attention. Ren's brow was now set in a deep crease, and she thought she could hear him grinding his jaw.

"After your proposal the other night, I have done a lot of thinking, and-"

He scoffed, "Oh I bet you have."

"Excuse me?"

He rolled his eyes at her. "I'm sure there was a lot of time for thinking when you were avoiding me this past week. Don't think I haven't noticed." 

She paused a moment, quite hurt by his accusatory tone. "Ren, where is this coming from?"

He stood out of his chair now, coming to tower over her. In the past, his imposing height had made her feel protected and safe, but she now found herself stepping away from him. 

"I think you know exactly where this is coming from. Have you decided to confess? Go ahead - tell me who it is."

She was taken aback. What did he think she was trying to tell him?

"What are you implying, Ren?" she asked, trying to conceal her own anger at his accusations. 

He chuckled darkly. "Do you take me for a fool? All throughout our courtship, I thought you unwavering in your devotion to me - I could sense the desperation in you the moment we met. It was what drew me to you." Kit looked at him appalled, but still he continued on. "You were exactly the type of obedient little girl Snoke said I needed - so imagine my surprise when I see you practically throwing yourself at other men!" his voice raised to a shout at the last words.

She stumbled backward now as he advanced on her. 

"I do not know what you think you saw, but I was never unfaithful," Kit said with all the strength she could muster. 

Cocking his head to the side, his hair came loose from its swept back style. It framed his face like a madman and was heightened by his now deranged gaze. 

"No, no - I have seen it," he pointed a finger in her face, "the way you parade around with the Colonel, or the dinners you spend flirting with that officer. And do not even get me started on your friendship with the General. I saw the way he held you, and the way you looked at him." Ren paused now, needing to catch his breath. Kit had placed her hands on his chest to keep him at a distance from her. He looked down to the gesture and scowled once more, before looking up with a malicious grin. "You were practically fucking him with your eyes."

She saw red. How dare he accuse her of something she was innocent of. She had only ever had eyes for Kylo - until he had shown his true colours that evening, and even now. In what world did he think this would entice her  to stay with him?

Kit wanted to slap him; she wanted to make him feel the same pain and distress that he had wrought on her life in such a short amount of time. Without thinking, she removed her hand from his chest and went to draw it back, but he saw the motion and wrenched out a hand to restrain her own, taking the other in his hand as well. 

Kit let out a shriek as his grip tightened on her wrists, wrestling against his hold. For the first time, she felt how strong he truly was and knew in this moment that she was absolutely at his mercy.

Heart beating a thousand miles a minute, Kit was beginning to hyperventilate. "Ren... please... let me go," she whimpered between breaths. His only response was to tighten his grasp and draw her back into him. 

"Kitty, did you really think you could hurt me? You should be thanking me; I'm willing to overlook your indiscretions as well as your plain features. Because now I know you'll obey me - and if you don't..." 

At this, he released her for a moment before spinning her around and pinning her arm behind her back as if she were a criminal being apprehended. The pain in her arms scorched from wrist to collarbone and she let out a loud cry of pain. 

He came to whisper in her ear, "You can't even imagine how much pain I could bring you if you left me." 

She felt a shudder wrack through her body, before he came to nip the shell of her ear. Lurching back from it, she only collided with his sturdy chest and twisted her arm further.

"No, please, please STOP!" she screamed out. 

"Kitty, that's no way to treat your-"

"Commander, I heard a scream - is everything alright?" came a muffled voice from outside the tent. 

Kit could not see Ren's eyes, but she imagined they were burning with hatred, for the voice belonged to none other than Hux. 

Quickly, Ren came to cover Kit's mouth lest she give away their situation. 

He was quiet for a moment, pondering the best course of action. It was as if he were treating this predicament like one of his battles. 

Suddenly he straightened up and chuckled devilishly in a tone so quiet only Kit could hear. 

"Unless you wish for the sight of me taking Miss Vara's maidenhood you'd best move along, General," Ren gritted out. 

Kit could have sworn she heard Hux let out a shocked sound. She was equally shocked at Ren's choice of a lie, and prayed to all that would listen that it would not come to fruition. 

"A-apologies..." he stuttered out, before Kit heard the sound of his quick footsteps leaving the tent. She sobbed silently at his leaving, as she was once more at Ren's mercy. 

Once they were met with total silence, Ren slowly removed his hand from Kit' mouth, but still kept her in the painful embrace. 

"I can feel your heartbeat Kitty - relax. I won't take you tonight." Kit breathed a sigh of relief. But then Ren started again, "Once we've eradicated the Resistance scum from their base, then I will take you. I can just imagine it now - how tight your little cunt will feel wrapped around me." 

Ren drew her impossibly closer, and Kit could feel the outline of something hard pressing into her backside. Never in her life had she felt so violated. 

But then he sighed into her hair and loosened his hold. Kit immediately wrenched her arms free and rubbed the sore spots on her wrist that were sure to leave a mark. 

"Knowing now what I can do to you, do I have your word that you will remain true to me and be my queen?" he said in his more familiar soft tone. 

Kit's eyes were welling with tears and she could only look at him with despair. But as he made to step closer to her again, she leapt away and nodded her head in response - if only to keep him away from her. 

"Don't be frightened, little mouse. Now go back to your tent, put your ring back on and do not speak a word of what happened tonight to a single soul. I have loyal men everywhere, and they will know if you talk, or if you try to run."

Her bottom lip wobbled as she tried to maintain composure. 

"Now, goodnight," he said, coming to kiss the top of her head as he had done so so affectionately in the past. "I love you."

If that was love, Kit did not want it. 

Brought back to the present moment by the shouting of one of the officers, Kit absently rubbed the dark ring of bruises that now covered each of her wrists. Though her sleeves were long enough to conceal them, she had been on edge all morning that someone would notice. That, or her engagement ring. She had taken extra precautions to hide her hands, but she did not know how long it was until someone saw it. 

For now though, it seemed as if the crowd were too occupied by whomever was making their way through the throng of officers. 

From her and Rey's position at the back of the crowd with the other nurses, the last of Mitaka’s speech faded into nothingness as she watched the soldiers part in two. The sea of black uniforms diverged to create a perfect aisle, and heading the movement was a darkly draped figure. 

There was no mistaking it; no other held such an imposing aura about them- nor did they walk as if they were stalking prey. 

It was true that Ren had taken his anointment as heir in stride. Every day since, he had not been seen without his ceremonial uniform - complete with the red sash and the new addition of a golden shoulder tassel looping beneath his arm. 

He wore it now, though he was also equipped with a large rapier. Held at his hip, the weapon was something Kit had never seen before; it was obnoxiously large and sturdy, with a thick cross guard that had been bezeled with rubies on either end. Though rifles were the superior instrument, this rapier held such a power that Kit had no doubt in her mind that Ren could do far much more damage with it than any officer with a gun. 

As he stalked up the aisle to the head of the stairs where Mitaka and Hux stood, he did not spare a glance to anyone. For that, Kit was quite thankful for she knew she could not look upon him without being reminded of last night. 

But it was what followed Ren that drew gasps from the crowd. 

Linked in his grasp, the Commander held a thick piece of rope, trailing several metres behind him. As Kit followed its movements, she came to see that there was a person on the other end of it, stumbling down the aisle with bound hands and next to no clothing. 

From such a distance away, she could not make out who it was. Until she glimpsed the curls of his dark hair. 

It was Poe. 

Nearly unrecognisable from the mud that caked his skin, he could barely walk and was almost being dragged by Ren. 

As he stumbled down towards her position, he caught sight of her out of the corner of his eye. Maintaining eye contact for barely a moment, she could read a look of despair upon his features. It took every fibre of her being to remain stoic and leave him to be hauled along.

Once the Commander had reached the other officials, he gave a vicious tug on the rope which saw Poe falling face first into the ground, helpless with bound hands. 

Kit's heart lurched for the poor man, wishing there was anything she could do. But since last night, she felt helpless against him. Resistance was futile. 

All she could do was watch. 

Leaning down to his prisoner, Ren grabbed Poe by what remained of his shirt collar and hoisted him into the air. Poe's head lolled to his chest, hanging almost limp in the Commander's grasp. 

Turning to the large expanse of door they stood before, Ren lifted him up, as if to show those inside. 

"Resistance, look what has become of your precious General Dameron. He has betrayed you all and told us of your whereabouts. Surrender now and I shall let him live. Resist, and I shall cut his head from his shoulders!" Ren boomed up at the stony abyss. 

There was a moment of silence, with no movement from either side. 

Kit could nearly hear her heartbeat. She knew that Poe had not given away the Resistance's hiding place. Ren was spinning his web of lies even on the enemy. 

As Ren lowered Poe to the ground, he raised his sword in a sweeping motion ready to strike, but there was suddenly the sound of scraping metal as the large barriers were unlatched from the door. 

Ren smirked in satisfied contentment, dropping Poe from his grasp to be dealt with by one of the officers. 

A weight was lifted from Kit's shoulders, but now she dreaded what was to come for the Resistance members. 

As the ancient doors slowly gave way, the inner courtyard of the fortress was revealed. Instead of the armed soldiers Kit expected, within the courtyard stood little under one hundred civilian-dressed individuals, with possibly ten to sixteen of them actually in possession of a weapon. The rest were either too young, or too old - but all of them looked terrified as Kylo Ren strutted through the fortress doors freely. 

The crowd of First Order soldiers followed closely behind, entering into the fortress grounds and ensuring none were to escape. Still at the back, Kit found a wooden crate to stand on so as to gain a better view of Ren's actions. 

She noticed that at the front of the Resistance crowd stood an older looking woman, dressed in an earthy purple gown with hair that almost seemed to reflect the same undertones. Within her hand, she held a white cloth - the symbol of surrender. 

This was no Leia, yet she was evidently the leader of these people. 

"I am Vice Admiral Holdo. On behalf of my people, we will surrender - and you shall let General Dameron live." She stepped away from the crowd and moved directly before Ren. 

Seeming to disregard the Admiral's words, Ren looked past her out amongst the Resistance members and seemed displeased. "So the Resistance send a woman to do a man's job. Is this some sort of mind trick? Do they think I will treat easier with you because of your sex?"

Holdo remained stone faced. "No. I expect the same treatment as any other."

Ren nodded at this. "Good, good. Then we are on the same page, I suppose?"

"Indeed," she replied formally. 

"Then I accept your surrender," he said followed by a short smile, before brandishing his rapier and driving it straight through her stomach. 

Kit had not yet blinked in the time it took him to do so. Everyone in witness of the act was too stunned to speak, shocked and abhorred at Ren's disregard for the proceedings of a surrender. 

But when the blood began to pour from her mouth and seep into her dress, the screams began to arise. 

Kit watched as the defenceless Resistance folk clambered away from Ren, but were halted in their actions by the officers lining the fortress walls.

There was movement from within the crowd as as figure pushed their way through. 

"Ren, what on EARTH do you think you are DOING!" came the harsh reprimand of Hux as he sidled up to the Commander with clenched fists. Kit had not seen him much at all today. 

"I am ensuring their unwavering cooperation, Hux. So let me do my duty."

"Your duty was to follow the orders of Snoke - tell me where it said that you were to commit crimes of war!"

Ren gritted his teeth at Hux, displeased that someone was holding him accountable for his actions. "Lock the rest in the cells," Ren shouted to no-one in particular, as he wiped the blood from his blade. 

A younger officer nearby saluted the Commander before voicing his concerns, "But Commander, there will hardly be enough cells to hold them all - what of the women and childr-"

"I do not care - see it done."

The young man scurried off to do as he was told. 

"General, see to it that there are no stragglers within the fortress walls. And that is an order from your superior," Ren spoke condescendingly. 

Hux's look could kill, as his razor sharp gaze bore holes into Kylo's own. "Affirmative," was all the General offered before beginning his search within the stronghold. 

---

Kit was surprised at how quickly the regiment took control of the fortress. Within hours, all Resistance banners and symbology were torn down and replaced with the insignia of the First Order. Holdo's body was removed from the courtyard and the blood had been scrubbed from existence. 

And amongst it all, Commander Ren paced about the halls admiring his handiwork, almost as if he hadn't just slaughtered an innocent only a short time ago. 

All Resistance personnel had been escorted to the dungeons - locked in cells far too small and reeking of mildew. 

Kit caught a glimpse of Poe being dragged down there too, though she suspected he would be placed in a solitary cell so that he did not seize control and develop a plan of escape. 

The one upside of the whole ordeal - if  it could even be called that - was that the Regiment were allocated proper beds, and now as a higher ranking member, Kit was even allocated a private room. 

As she stepped within the tiny stone dorm, she felt bile rise in her stomach at the thought of the owner of the bed rotting away in the fortress dungeon below, with only a rock for a pillow. She would not sleep well tonight. 

Though she doubted she would sleep at all, given what Ren had promised her only last night. 

He wanted to bed her. Tonight. 

There was to be a banquet to celebrate their success, but after the drinking and feasting was over, Kit dreaded what awaited her. 

As if instinctual, the paralysing fear of motherhood began to permeate through every part of her mind. 

Though her sentiment had appeared otherwise to Ren, she did not dislike children themselves. In fact, she was secretly quite fond of them. But she would never admit such a thing to another - she struggled to even admit it to herself. Pondering the vision she'd had of her future children all those weeks ago, she recalled the sense of serenity she'd felt in that moment with the babe pressed to her chest. 

In theory, the prospect of a child was pleasant. But the possibility that Kit would fail the child as a mother - as her own had - was too much to bear. 

The vision faded, and Kit was overwhelmed with that same feeling her mother had inflicted all those years ago. 

Rationally, this should inspire her to be different from her own mother, and to ensure her own child would never have to feel the way she did. But this was the reality of her fear; more than just the physical pain she would feel - but the emotional pain she had the potential to inflict on her child. Would her desire for freedom lead her to do such a thing? It had been enough of a reason for her mother, she had suspected - so how could Kit be sure she would be any different? 

And now with the added prospect of Kylo Ren as a father, Kit dreaded the way he would treat the child. He had been so willing to hurt his betrothed, so what was to stop him from doing the same to his own child?

This factor far outweighed her personal hesitance towards motherhood. 

Tonight she would have to take measures to ensure that she did not become with child. She felt queasy even thinking of the act, but tried to push it aside for as long as possible. There was still the banquet to attend, after all.

Kit spent the remainder of the afternoon in her chamber, pacing the small space and attempting to develop a plan for when the time came. She once more had no clothes other than her uniform, so she would be force to wear that to the feast. 

Maybe Ren would find her so unappealing that he would forgo her company for the evening. But then she remembered his comment on looking past her 'plain features' and realised she was fighting a losing battle. 

That comment still stung. She knew she was not pretty in the traditional sense, but had every compliment he'd given her been a farce? Was his whole goal of courting her just to ensure that he had someone to serve as a sort of breeding machine to bear his children? Someone naive and inexperienced enough to believe his actions were genuine?

Recalling their first few interactions, Kit supposed that he had acted quite quickly in securing her courtship. It really had been too good to be true. 

Ruminating on the lies she had been told for nearly the past year, Kit was interrupted by Rey's knocking and voice on the other side of her door, signalling it was time for the banquet. 

"I'll be out in a moment!" Kit yelled through the hardwood. 

This would likely be the worst evening of her life. 

Notes:

Thoughts, opinions? Ren is pretty nasty here, but hopefully it didn't come as too much of a surprise. Let me know what you think!

Chapter 17: Escape

"No, it does look like her! What an uncanny resemblance!"

"I fear you have had one too many wines, Colonel."

"Finn, I am telling you, it looks just like her! Minus the blonde hair." 

As Kit entered the banquet hall, her senses were assaulted with a myriad of exotic foods that could only be borne from a proper kitchen. And then there were also Finn and Mitaka having a very intense but drunken debate as they stood beside the gallery wall. 

Covered with paintings of various sizes from floor to ceiling, it was quite a splendour to behold. Kit could not remember the last time she visited a gallery or saw an opera, so this was the closest she had come to a cultural experience for some time.

Taking stock of the content of the paintings, she noted that nearly all were portraits or large group ensemble pieces. Judging by the fashion and painting styles, she could tell that some were quite old but most were more recent. But then she noticed what they had been arguing about. 

Approximately two metres up on the wall, a portrait about the size of a large book hung within a golden frame, and it bore an uncanny likeness to Kit. 

"Oh my," she said quietly. Kit did not have the mental energy right now to give a proper reaction, but the woman in the painting shared many of her features - though they were slightly more feminine than Kit's. 

"Is there another Vara sister you haven't told us about?" joked Mitaka, but all Kit could do was give a short smile before wandering over to an empty seat. Her friends shared a look between themselves, and she was silently thankful that Rey had found herself occupied elsewhere, otherwise she would have been onto Kit in an instant asking after her behaviour. 

She thought back to the accusations that Ren had made against her, and she couldn't meet Finn or Mitaka's eyes. Kit did not wish to invoke Ren's ire again, especially not tonight. 

For now, she had to at least eat something, but she could not subject herself to Mitaka's unending joviality with her mind the way it was presently. On the table before her, she spied a thick cut of lamb accompanied by gravy and practically felt her mouth salivate at the sight.

Once she had secured the piece, Kit devoured it in an instant along with some roast vegetables, and for a brief moment was able to forget that they were eating the food of innocent individuals who had just had their home invaded and assets seized, likely to never be returned. 

It was not even late yet, but still she felt the dread of anticipation eating away at her. She was just glad that Ren was nowhere to be found at present. 

Kit felt the bench dip beside her. Great. Company. Just what she wanted. 

"Did you hate today as much as I did?"

Oh. Hux. 

Kit did not look at him, but fidgeted with her hands as she responded, "I think I would be hard to beat."

He hummed at that, observing that it would be best to avoid discussing today's events all together.

He sighed uneasily. "I... I meant to come and apologise about last evening, when I mistakenly interrupted..."

"Oh," said Kit lacking any emotion as she thought back to last night. She had forgotten Hux had heard. 

She could not meet his gaze, not because she was embarrassed but she knew that if she did, he would know something was the matter. 

"I wish you well, but I just hope that Ren-" he immediately stopped his words.

Alarmed, Kit now looked to him for the first time that night, but found him staring down at her fidgeting fingers. Her fingers that were fidgeting with her ring. 

"Kit... I... I believe congratulations are in order?" he said with a tone of shock. 

"Something like that," she sighed, unable to conceal the sadness in her tone. 

Their eyes met for the briefest of moments, but Kit knew immediately that he had seen into her. 

"Forgive me, Kit, but you do not sound as overjoyed as a future bride should.... A future queen no less," he said softly so that those around did not hear them. Their table was far from any of the others, so they were safe. 

"It's just..." she could not finish her sentence, suddenly feeling as though her lungs were trapped within a vice.

"Kit did he... are you with child?" he whispered frantically. 

This was not good. Glancing around her, she looked for anyone that could be serving Ren as an informant. Anyone that would hear her disobeying him. 

"No, we never actually... were together in such a way," she whispered back, blushing at her admission to the General. 

He was now a shade of pink too. "But, those sounds - Ren said..."

"He lied. I was in that tent, but we were not being intimate," Kit finally admitted. 

Hux was silent for a moment. "Then what was he doing to you, Kit?" he asked with such earnest. 

She did not speak, but simply lifted her sleeves from her wrists to reveal the dark purple rings of bruises that encircled each of them. 

Looking to Hux, he was once again stunned into silence. Where his initial reaction had been pure shock, it had now settled into a stewing rage that could barely be concealed. 

"He did this to you?" Hux asked lowly. 

"Yes. I tried to call the engagement off, but he wouldn't hear it. He's going to hurt me if I leave him - if he even finds out I have been speaking to you," she blurted out breathlessly. Tears were beginning to well in her eyes and she was clutching her fists so tight her nails were leaving indents on her palms. 

All of a sudden, she felt like that little girl in Arkanis who did not know how to express her emotions, and simply bottled up her anger until it burst out as sadness. 

Eyes still fixated on the bruises, Hux nodded slowly. "And now you feel as though you're trapped."

"Yes... and he promised me that after we had laid claim to the fortress that he would... take me."

He had to look at her then. 

With such concern on his face, he looked almost youthful. 

"Oh, Katherine..." he said with nothing but pity in his voice. Instinctively he reached out a hand to grasp her own under the table. Just as he did the night they danced together. 

It was a comfort to her, and she found herself steadying her breathing so that she could continue in her explanation. 

"And the worst part is that... I was just going to let it happen... I can't see a way out," she whispered, and finally a tear fell. 

"I will not let him touch you," Hux proclaimed to her alone. His hand was still there, caressing her knuckle in reassurance. 

"How? He's your superior. And one day he will be king. With that much unchecked power, who knows what he will be capable of... He could hurt you, or Mitaka. Even my family."

She had him there. But knowing Hux, he had never been one to admit defeat. 

"I may have an idea. But you will need to trust me."

---

Late into the hours of the night, the banquet raged on. At some point, Mitaka gave another of his generic victory speeches in an attempt to suggest that this operation heralded in the end of the war. Though the lack of actual soldiers was never mentioned. She could tell that it pained him to have to partake in such pageantry. 

Kit honestly wondered to herself where their troops were stationed. It had been quite some time since they last saw real combat, and every time they had been met with a sizeable infantry. 

But as the clock stroke the agreed upon hour, Kit left her table that she had been seated alone at since Hux had told her of his plan. Hopefully he was in position by now. 

There were so many ways this could go wrong. But what good was it if they did not try?

She recognised now that Hux was putting not only his job on the line, but also his life with what he had told her he was prepared to do. 

It was funny, Kit thought, that it took the possibility of Ren forcing himself on her to realise how thankful she was for Hux's friendship. It was not the first time he had saved her, and if his plan did truly work she would be indebted to him. But she did not mind that fact, and hoped she could one day repay the favour. 

With a last glance to the banquet hall, Kit began her way up the stairs to her room - trying her best to maintain her composure. Carrying a single candle for light, it flickered and whirled as she rose up to the northern wing of the fortress.

Observing she had not been followed, Kit entered her small chamber and locked it behind her. That was the first precaution Hux had suggested - for maybe she could simply lock him out. 

Treating it as any normal night, Kit removed her uniform overlayer to leave her in just her shift. She placed the worn dress and her boots on the chair beside the desk, foregoing the large wardrobe that stood to the far end of the room. 

Now all she had to do was lie and wait. 

She had not imagined it to be this nerve wracking. Hux had reassured her that he would not allow Ren to do anything to her, but she had experienced first hand how strong and indomitable the Commander was.

Kit realised now that she was fearing for Hux's safety just as much as her own, as she watched the wax of the candle gradually overflow until it began to pool in the silver holster below. 

It had to have been no more than thirty minutes before Kit heard footsteps outside her door. 

They got louder as they drew nearer, until they eventually stopped. But they were quickly replaced with the rattling of the doorknob, as Ren had evidently found it to be locked. 

She heard him chuckle through the door. 

This was followed by the sound of a key being placed in the lock, until it clicked open in response. 

Of course he had a key. They had been foolish to think otherwise. 

But it was almost as if Ren hesitated, as he did not enter the room immediately. Maybe he was having second thoughts, and had actually considered Kit's pleas from the evening prior. 

Any suggestion of rationality left her mind when she heard the door creak open, and Ren's large boots step across the threshold. 

Locking the door behind him, he pocketed the key and finally turned to face Kit's sleeping form. 

It was now or never. 

Sitting bolt upright in bed, Kit regarded Ren with a look that betrayed no emotion. She kept her voice level as she spoke, "Commander, you know that I do not want this. I do not want this marriage. If you leave now and promise to break it off, I will never mention the matter again and it can be put behind us."

She was proud of herself for getting that out. It was her last plea to his sane mind before they took additional actions. 

Ren simply scoffed. 

"Now why would I want to do that? I will have my way with you tonight - it's just up to you whether or not you're a willing participant. And after that, when you grow heavy with my child, you'll submit to me. Because you, Kitty, are out of options. And time."

His words grated on her, but she did not show it. The day that Katherine Vara submitted to a man would be her last. 

Things were going as Hux had expected. She just had to render him fully distracted. 

She may as well seek some answers to her questions along the way. 

"Did you ever actually love me?"

He quirked a brow. "I don't think I'm capable of that emotion - but it was what you needed to be told at the time." Ren smirked to himself. "So forgive me if I don't proclaim my love for you while I'm fucking you into that bed tonight."

Kit's eye twitched. It was her first giveaway of any emotion. She would not dwell on that answer.

"You once called my father a good man. Was this the truth?"

Ever since he had begun to reveal his true colours, Kit had wondered this about the Commander. Though she feared what she might find. 

"Hardly. He was a bane in my side - not too dissimilar from your precious Hux. It was the greatest relief when I heard he had fallen in Craitshire." He paused as if for a grim dramatic effect. "I was the one who sent him there, after all."

She could not believe her ears.

"You bastard!" Kit screamed, lunging out of her bed. This had not been part of the plan. 

"Ah, there she is."

"You signed his death warrant! You knew Craitshire was practically suicide!"

Ren smiled devilishly. "Just as I had intended."

She was breathing heavily now, regarding him with pure disgust and suddenly absent of all fear. It had now been replaced by seething, burning hatred for the man she thought she had loved. "You are pathetic, Kylo Ren."

"The feeling is mutual. Now bend over," he said authoritatively, while coming to clutch the bulge in his pants. Kit could see that he was already hard, and realised that he was probably getting off on their conflict.

"No," she seethed as she stepped away. 

"Let's not do this again. It will just end the same as last time."

Without warning, a large thud was heard as the doors of Kit's wardrobe flew open to reveal the General, brandishing a loaded pistol and pointed in Ren's direction. 

"I would not be so sure of that," Hux said smugly, relishing in the look of sheer surprise he had rendered on Ren's features. 

Though it was gone in almost a moment and replaced by that cocky smirk the Commander wore too often. 

"I am almost impressed. Between the two of you, how long have you been planning this? Is this your grand plan, Hux - kill me and take my betrothed?

"I am not stupid, Ren," Hux commented as he stepped further into the small room. The gun was now pointed directly at Ren's heart.

"Then what reason have you for this idiocy? I assume you know that if you don't use that on me I will simply kill you myself."

Hux did not seem phased by that threat, and only cocked the gun in response. "I am here to make a deal."

Kit watched as Ren rolled his eyes at Hux's statement. It was either a very convincing act, or Ren truly felt no fear. 

"And what at all could you wish to bargain with? I am untouchable. Soon, this entire kingdom will bow to me. So go ahead - make your offer."

Hux let out a pent up breath through his nose. "You will end your betrothal to Katherine and leave this room immediately. In exchange, I vow to continue my silence regarding some personal matters of yours."

"And what personal matters of mine would you be privy to that would cause me to do such a thing?" Ren asked, his temper growing short.  

"Regarding your parentage."

Ren scoffed. "Many are aware - it is not something I am ashamed of. I have even told her of it," Ren admitted, nodding towards Kit.

"Yes, you may have. But you likely excluded details of your mother. Or more precisely, how she survived."

Ren went pale. 

"I am sure that the lords who fund your wars and lifestyle would be delighted to know that Kylo Ren personally escorted Queen Leia to freedom. Especially when she was set to hang that very evening. Coupled with the knowledge that her survival is the sole reason that the Resistance still lives on. Say goodbye to that crown."

Kit had never seen the Commander be silenced in this way. 

"So Ren, what say you? Will you buy my silence?

"These are lies. None shall believe you."

"How can you be so sure? Is it a risk you wish to take? To potentially lose the throne?"

Kit could see the conflict of thoughts running across Ren's features, and she noted that he had never looked this vulnerable in all their time together. Hux's intel was undoubtedly true then. She did not question how he learned such coveted information, but simply relished in the anguish that the choice was causing Ren. 

"I'm waiting," Hux said impatiently, waving the gun for emphasis. 

Finally, Ren seemed to have made a decision. 

"Take your whore. I never wish to lay eyes on her again," he spat, looking directly at Kit. Turning his anger back to Hux, he continued, "And know that if you ever relay that information to another soul I will end you. Consequences be damned."

As he turned to leave, he looked to Kit for one last time, as if expecting her to say something to him. But she had nothing to say and would not dignify him with a response.  Kit turned her head up at him and watched as he retreated through the doors like a dog with its tail between its legs. 

They had done it. 

She was free from Kylo Ren.

Notes:

This felt so over the top, but I love some drama. Maybe now Kit can finally relax and won't have to deal with Ren anymore? We'll see.

As always, hit me with your feedback! We've got about 10 more chapters to go, so there is still a lot of development that needs to happen ;)

Chapter 18: Aftermath

Notes:

Hello I am back! So sorry for the three week wait - I've had uni exams and a Hozier concert. BTW seeing Domhnall on screen was insanity, so thank you mister Hozier you gave me motivation to write.

Also in between then I got impatient and wrote a Kylo Ren/Reader/Hux fic so check that out if this slow burn is burning too slow!

Enjoy!

“Katherine… please... say something. You are worrying me.”

It was funny - it was almost as if someone were saying her name. Her given name. And she strangely did not find it abhorrent at all. She found herself oddly comforted by the sound, and once again felt as though she were being pulled from the depths of the lake by its gentle embrace. 

It would be nice to stay here a moment longer, she thought. But there was a tugging feeling in her heart that someone needed her in the present.

As she deliberated remaining in her hazy underwater peace, air was finally breathed into her lungs when she felt a gentle hand on her cheek. 

Blinking away the fog, she leant into its warmth, enjoying the way the digits brushed just slightly behind the shell of her ear. It felt safe. Like home.

"There you are," said Hux with a sigh of relief as Kit's eyes focused back in on the room. Kit did not know if he did it willingly, but his thumb was softly caressing her cheek back and forth in a way that brought goosebumps up her arms. 

Gazing up at him, she could see the weariness in his eyes. It was late, after all. She was almost ready to respond with a witty quip, but there was something erratic about those eyes, in the way they skirted across every aspect of her face and would not still. They remained gentle, but the sight worried her nonetheless. 

It was then she noticed his other hand that had held the gun was shaking ever so slightly by his side. Possibly all the adrenaline coursing through him after pointing a weapon at his direct superior. 

"Armitage, you're trembling..." Kit said softly, moving to take his hand. Even when enveloped between both of Kit's, the long digits of Hux's hand dwarfed her own. Slender and lithe, it was no wonder he was excellent on the pianoforte. 

He looked down to where they were joined and gave a hum of acknowledgement and a small smile. "Even when you have just evaded the most dangerous man in the kingdom you are still putting someone else's needs before your own," he chuckled softly. "Do not fret about me - what about you, Katherine?"

She looked at him questionably. What about her? This was finished - was it not? They had overcome the tyrannical Kylo Ren and Kit was now once more a free woman. 

Free. 

She had once thought she knew what that meant. To be able to decide what she wanted from her life. She had thought that choosing Ren was the best use of it, but it turned out to be what nearly took it all away. 

Freedom was good, but it meant nothing if she could not be happy. 

And Hux was right - that began with putting herself first for once. 

"I... I do not know. What do I do now?" was all she could think to say, so unused to the concept of self advocation. 

A lesser person would have allowed her to wallow in her confusion. But Hux was no such man. 

Never removing his hand from her cheek, he looked down at her and she noticed his eyes had stilled. All his attention was on her. "Now, Katherine Vara, you live your life - any way you see fit. But you don't need me to tell you that."

Something resonated within her. 

Within seconds, tears were falling from her eyes, as Kit sobbed helplessly at the ground. Hux wasted no time in drawing her in for an embrace, resting his head atop her own. Nestled in the crook of his neck, she breathed him in and tried but failed not to dampen his military jacket. 

As her body silently convulsed at the wave of emotions, the General simply stood there with her, as if he were trying to draw any part of the anguish away from her and into him.

The soothing caress along her back guided her breathing, and once she had exhausted her tears, they remained there in silence. 

Hux drew in a slow, deep breath, and Kit could feel as he held her just ever so slightly tighter. 

This was... nice, she realised. Ren had never been one for simple acts of affection, as most instances with him had often led down a more sexually charged route. But standing here embraced by Hux, she felt no pressure to do anything that would make her uncomfortable. 

Kit wondered silently if Hux was married, feeling a pang of guilt for the thought of a Mrs Hux sitting at home while Kit sobbed into his chest. But why should she? They were not romantically involved. Though she found it odd that in all the time she had known Hux that he had never mentioned anything of his love life. Still, the thought lingered.  

With that in mind, she took a step back, drying her tears with the sleeve of her nightgown. 

"Thank you," she said in between sniffles, "for everything - for all of it."

He chuckled at that, obviously amused by her immediate reaction to his words prior. "I am simply glad that you are safe."

Finding that she needed to sit, Kit placed herself at the end of the bed, feet dangling off the side. Hux came to join her, leaving a respectable distance between them. 

"So, will you remain with the First Order? I can very easily understand if you wish to return to Arkanis," Hux said with a twinge of sadness. 

It had never even been a thought to Kit in the moments following her escape. "No. That chapter of my life has closed, and if I returned I would simply wished I had stayed; regardless of all that has transpired. I genuinely enjoy what I do," she looked to him now, but had to look away when he met her eyes, "and most of the people aren't half bad." 

That earned her another chuckle. "As long as it is your decision, I will support you in any way I can." He sighed. "Though I do not know what Ren will do now. We shall have to see."

A thought occurred to Kit. "Why don't you just expose his secret anyway? It would rid us of him," she suggested lightly. 

He looked down, fidgeting with his hands. "He must not have made the realisation, but to do so I would have to reveal my source of that information. And that is something I cannot do without putting others at risk."

Kit was taken aback at that. He had been so willing to bargain that information for her safety - but these were other individuals on the line. 

"You... were willing to risk that... just for me?" she whispered, still unbelieving and now possessed with a new type of guilt. 

"I could not sit idly by and let him do that to you. You must understand why."

But she did not. What was he saying? Why would he do such a thing for her - a woman who had hated him until several months ago. They were friends, yes. But what he did seemed somewhat outside the bounds of friendship.

Though it suddenly dawned on her. 

"Oh... Armitage."

He turned towards her with such anticipation, as if he were waiting for every word with bated breath. 

"Yes?" he shakily replied.

"This is all because of my father, isn't it? Ren told me he assigned him to Craitshire on purpose. You didn't have anything to do with that, did you?" she voiced her realisation aloud. 

He looked stunned for a moment, as if that was not what he had expected from her. Then he seemed to blink it away, shaking his head to clear his thoughts. 

"I did not know that the command had come from Ren. I was actually on base when I heard that your father's troops were being sent to the front lines... but we all believed it to be an order from Snoke. Me and several others protested sending in a single regiment with no reinforcements, but Ren stated he was only following orders." Hux searched her eyes. "It seems we were both deceived."

Kit sniffled, thinking at how Ren had knowingly betrayed her trust from the moment he met her. 

"Well," Kit sighed, "consider any debt you think you owe me paid. That is why you helped me, isn't it?"

The General simply regarded her in silence for a moment, before relaxing his shoulders. "Partly. But also because that is what anyone who cares for you would do," his eyes lingered on her own. Quickly, he added, "I imagine Rey and Mitaka would have done the same without question."

She had probably known it already, but hearing Hux say that he cared for her made her stomach feel light and airy. This was new. 

"Well, thank you anyway. Though I don't think Rey would have had as much self control as you - that pistol would be empty by now if it were her," Kit said, chuckling at the image. 

Hux grinned. "Speaking of whom, will you share with them what has happened?"

This is something Kit had not considered. She had no desire to tell Mitaka, given his proximity to Ren and the fact that they were family. She did not wish to jeopardise his position. But Rey on the other hand, she felt like she could tell freely. The other nurse kept it no secret that she disliked Ren, and very often the Order too. And Kit knew Rey was trustworthy. 

"I can't imagine telling the Colonel... and I do not wish to compromise his position. I just know that he would feel somehow responsible for it all, and try and save my reputation by finding me a match. Reputation be damned - I fear I do not care anymore," she laughed to herself. "Though I think I will tell Rey. I do not mean any offence, but I need to talk this through with another woman."

"None taken," he smiled gently. 

The candle at her bedside was presently at risk of spilling onto the wooden table. It had grown far too late, they both seemed to realise at the same time. 

Sensing that he was still watching her, Kit put an end to his worries. "I will be alright, Armitage. I just have a lot of thinking to do, before my life returns back to normal. You know, I might write to my sisters and inquire about the weather - it will keep me occupied."

That seemed to satisfy him, as he rose from the bed and made for the door, but not before giving her hand a gentle squeeze. 

"Send them my regards. And sleep well, Katherine," he said, releasing his grasp and gently closing the door behind him. 

It was such a contrast to the storm of rage that Ren had left her in. 

Pushing him from her mind, Kit found sleep quickly, and drifted off into the soft embrace of the pillow - for once, without a worry of what tomorrow would bring. 

---

"So, this was all going on from the moment you joined up?"

Kit cringed, thinking back on how rushed everything with Ren had been. "Actually, we had met before of all this. There was a ball where we danced and he requested to write to me afterwards."

From their place against one of the garden walls, the two nurses were accompanied only by overgrown vines and wildflowers to hear Kit's retelling of her experience with Ren. 

Rey narrowed her eyes. "And he did seek permission from Canady, did he not?"

Kit hesitated, looking at the ground and pulling out a blade of grass. How had she been so foolish? If his intentions had been respectable, he would have had no issue with doing things by the book. Ren had just made her feel so special, that she had gone along with it regardless. "There was no... official courting period. No-one else knew about us," she whispered. "Except Hux."

Rey's eyes widened, and she had to halt the bite of her apple. "You told Hux? Why would you do that - surely he reported you the moment he found out?" 

Kit still could not meet Rey's eyes, feeling a sudden sense of embarrassment at her past self. "He... interrupted us one evening."

"Kit... tell me you didn't..."

"No! It never went that far. Though I think if we didn't stop Ren last night, he would have seized the opportunity..."

Rey could visibly see the inner turmoil her friend was facing. She put on such a strong act, but seeing it crumble before her very eyes had Rey concerned. She appreciated Kit's candour; it was rare for her to be so open about her emotions - particularly anything to do with her feelings on love. Rey was somewhat similar in that aspect, having been equally inexperienced until leaving for the Order. 

Turning to her friend, Kit tried to gauge Rey's reaction. She dreaded finding pity upon her features, but instead she found a cold and seething rage. 

"If I ever see that sorry excuse of a man again, I will personally rip his manhood from his body and feed it to the hounds," she said lowly. 

Startled by the visceral imagery, Kit could not believe that such a threat had come from the nurse. Though all things considered, she would not object if the opportunity to do so arose. 

Beginning with an airy chuckle, Kit broke the solemn mood, before the pair of them descended into a full blown fit of laughter, which was the only way Kit could seem to deal with her feelings on the matter.

"Oh how foolish I was. You know, I really thought there were moments when Ren was genuine. Like when he gave me this," she said, removing the ruby necklace from around her neck. Kit had almost forgotten that she was wearing it, as the elegant piece had become part of her every day wardrobe. 

Holding it out before Rey, Kit looked on in disgust as she let it fall into the dirt. 

"Though I feel this," she said, now removing the obnoxiously gilded engagement ring, "was somewhat forced upon me." 

The ring met the necklace in the dirt with a soft clink, and Kit rubbed the space on her ring finger that it had taken up. Gold never had been her colour. She was more of a silver. 

"Then to the earth they shall return," Rey said as she helped Kit to cover the pieces with a mound of dirt.

A moment of silence passed between the pair, as Rey held Kit's hand in her own. 

She was thankful for this; back home she did not have a close female friend whom she trusted and liked in the way that she did Rey. Another reason she could never go back. 

"I wonder how he will react, when he sees me today," Kit thought aloud. 

Rey fidgeted with one of Kit's knuckles. "I don't think you will need to worry about that. Finn told me the Commander left late last evening. Come to think of it, it must have been just after your confrontation..."

Kit did not know how to feel. While it was a relief that she would not see him anytime soon, she wondered what he had planned. He had been so preoccupied with securing this base, that she did not know where his ambitions ended - and if they ever would. Would he send their regiment to the slaughter just as he had her father?

Pushing those thoughts from her mind, she realised that catastrophising would do her no good. If the situation did arise in the future, she would confront it then. But for now, she was going to enjoy her time away from that abuser. 

Putting on her brave face once more, Kit stood up, pulling Rey with her. "Well, in that case I feel extremely inclined to indulge in some breakfast - Kylo Ren free."

"I would think you very much deserve that," Rey agreed, walking with her friend to the great hall.

---

Unlike the night previous, the hall was a ghost town. No candles remained lit, instead relying on the sunlight streaming in from the windows to brighten the large room. The party must have raged on for many hours after her departure, as countless plates and undrunk wine goblets lay scattered along the rectangular tables. 

So there was to be no breakfast, it seemed. 

Rey had offered to oversee Kit's nursing duties for the foreseeable future, so she was left alone to stalk through the deserted scraps of last night. 

Coming to one somewhat untouched platter on the table, Kit spied a pear and some small cheese pieces that seemed edible enough. 

She searched around to confirm that she was truly alone, before taking a bite of each. 

While the cheese was a little dry for her liking, the pear was ripe and juicy, and she silently grinned at its sweet flavour that she had not tasted for nearly a year. 

But as she sat with her makeshift breakfast, Kit was hit with a pang of guilt for those currently in the dungeons below. 

This was their food she was eating. And it was one of their beds she had been sleeping in last night. 

She had to stop her chewing for a moment. 

It suddenly dawned on her that without Kylo Ren to say otherwise, and by being close with Hux and Mitaka, no one could prevent her from helping those down below. Who would stop her if she snuck them pieces of cheese and fruit under the guise of tending to wounds?

And Poe. Poor, beaten and bruised Poe. That look he had given her while she could only watch was enough to squeeze on her heart strings, and she knew that she could no longer be a bystander to it all. To the First Order, in fact. 

Without the threat of Ren, what exactly was keeping her here? She could quite easily leave and take up a post  somewhere that did not have an active role in imprisoning innocents. But still, her mind told her to remain. Because deep down, she knew she could not abandon those who she had come to care for; her friends. 

But while she cared for them, it did not mean that she could not show compassion to those on the other side - or maybe even help their cause. Because now Kit had seen the future of the Order first hand, and she despised it. If Ren was to be the next ruler, she would do anything within the scope of her power to protect others from him - even if it involved remaining within the Order. 

Gathering up all the pieces of cheese and fruit that seemed untouched, she stuffed them into the pockets of her apron, trying to conceal as much as possible. She even spied a small lemon tart on her way to the door, wrapping it in cloth and pocketing it too. 

But as she did so, Kit once more came face to face with the large gallery wall of last evening. In the brighter light, all the colours had increased in vibrancy, and Kit could make out the features of each subject more easily. 

Mitaka had remarked that one of them looked like her, and she silently searched for it amongst the other portraits. 

When she found it, Kit was struck with a strange feeling. While the portrait had to have been old, the features were her own, save for Kit's fuller eyebrows and slightly rounder face. But this looked so much like her, the resemblance was undeniable. 

Stepping closer to examine it further, she noted that the eyes were not the same colour as her own. They were an almost otherworldly blue, that she had only seen once before. 

Her faint memories flicked back to when she was thirteen, watching her mother leave for the last time. The look of anguish those eyes had borne; the way they had glistened near the firelight. These were those same eyes. But she did not remember her mother looking like this... but then again, Kit could not recall her face in its entirety anymore. Everyone had always said that Jayne, with the prettier face, had resembled their mother more. But it would appear that in her youth, she was a near duplicate of Kit. 

Why was a portrait of her mother hanging in the Resistance fortress? Had she lived here once? 

And what was it that Poe had once remarked when they first met - that she looked awfully familiar? 

With all these thoughts spinning through her head, she needed answers, and she suspected she knew just who would have them.

Notes:

So Ren is gone! For now...

And what could this strange portrait be?? Does Kit have an evil twin?????

Hit me with your ideas and thoughts - I love hearing them!!!

Chapter 19: Loyalty

Notes:

Alrighty, we're back - clocking in at just over 4k words.

Enjoy!

Gaining access to the dungeon had been surprisingly easy. 

Making a stop to the med ward first - for the fortress actually had facilities beyond just a tent and a few stretchers - Kit pocketed some supplies and a satchel to assist in smuggling the additional food she was carrying. Once the prison guard had seen the red cross on her sleeve, he stepped aside without question, allowing her free reign of the cells below under the guise that she was there merely to provide medical care. 

It was not a total lie. 

Upon entering, she had to stand by the doorway to allow her eyes to adjust to the sudden darkness. Positioned below the grounds of the fortress, there were not even iron-barred windows to provide sunlight for the poor souls. Their only source of illumination came from the wooden sconces lined along the wall, though they were dimming by the minute. 

There also could not have been sufficient air flow, for the stench of wet mildew permeated throughout as she stepped deeper and deeper into the dungeon. 

Noticing that the path before her was barely visible, Kit took an unused torch from the opposite wall, lighting it on one that was beginning to die as she held it aloft to light her way. 

The sudden brightness caused a hiss to descend upon the cells. She wondered fearfully if there were a nest of snakes that she had startled, but upon lowering the flame closer to a cell, noticed that those sounds were of human origin. 

Gasping, Kit took in the sight before her. 

Within one cell, there were at least twenty people, all in various states of disarray and cowering from the flame. It had barely been two days, and already they were in such a state. 

Their clothes had acquired a layer of grime and muck, while some had removed them completely to cope with the damp conditions.

As she moved about the chamber, more cells came into view; each as overcrowded as the last. At the very back of the underground dungeon, a cell entirely full of children was alive with thirty pairs of eyes watching Kit's movements. 

This was what Ren had ordered. 

She recalled how some of the soldiers had tried to protest - even how Hux had objected - but they were all silenced by Ren's word.

Had he even ordered his men to feed them? 

She could not spy a food tray anywhere, let alone one for water or even a chamber pot for their waste. 

These were inhumane conditions, even for prisoners. 

Though Kit did not see them as prisoners, for that title implied they did something to deserve their treatment. They had done nothing except be unprepared for the First Order to come marching in and cease their home. Their Admiral had even offered a surrender, but Ren in all his stupidity had seen fit to kill her instead. 

Kit could not be happier that he had left the base. 

"Miss, hey Miss!" came a little voice from the cell up the back. 

Twirling on her heel, she followed the sound to a young boy sticking his head through the bars of his cell. At a closer glance, she noticed his face was grimy and his eyes were squinting at the flame, but he seemed intent on speaking to her nonetheless.

"Yes?" Kit whispered in a hushed tone - still unsure if the guard would not take kindly to her speaking with the enemy. 

"Got anything to eat? We're starving," he whined. 

The poor thing. 

So her assumptions had been true - no food for these people since at least the day before last. 

"I- I do, yes," said Kit in quick succession, pushing away the thoughts of guilt that she had not brought enough food to feed them all. 

Glancing back to the faces in the other cells, she noticed that not a single pair of eyes were not watching her movements. 

"I was not able to bring much... It will not be enough for everybody," she said to no one in particular. 

"Please, just feed our children," came a male voice from the darkness of the cell. The other voices seemed to give approval to that, so Kit did as she was instructed. 

Unwrapping the smuggled goods, she handed out small pieces of cheese and dried meats through the bars, along with several apples and one or two pears. It was by no means sufficient, but it would provide their small bodies with enough energy to see them through until tomorrow, where hopefully she could organise something more adequate. 

As she reached the bottom of her satchel, she felt the small lemon tart in its cloth wrapping. This item already had an owner, so she elected to keep it hidden from the hungry eyes.

"Thank you, Miss," said the same boy from before. With a red juicy apple in his hand, he seemed much more lively than even moments previous. 

Kit felt good, being able to help them even a little bit. But it still was not enough. What was going to become of their parents? 

"So you're a nurse, huh?" said a feminine voice beside her. 

Her eyes seemed to have adjusted by now, as Kit was able to make out the face of a young woman, about her own age, with an intricately braided halo of hair sat atop her head. Though by now it had begun to come undone.

"What gave me away?" Kit asked, trying to lighten the mood. 

The girl simply nodded at Kit's armband. 

At camp, she had rarely worn it as there were no other women to be seen on the battlefield, so it seemed self-explanatory. But now that they had sent in cooks, maids and other servants from First Order loyalist settlements, it seemed necessary to avoid confusion. Especially as their numbers would continue to grow. 

"Is anyone injured? I've got some bandages and herbs if needed," Kit offered, not knowing what to say to the girl. 

She gave a low chuckle. "I think hunger is more our issue. Don't think anyone's hurt exactly... except Poe," she added. 

Kit had nearly forgot. He was the whole reason she was down here. 

"Poe? Where is he? Is he in your cell?"

The girl arched a brow at Kit's sudden interest, trying to gauge her intent. "You know Poe?"

Kit hesitated. Should she divulge such information? Especially to a stranger she had just met. 

"I was assigned to provide his medical care while at camp. I am going to continue to do so," Kit replied, ever the professional. And it was also the truth. 

"I can't argue with that," the other girl said. "But if I tell you where he is, please, don't just leave us - get us food, and proper water. We've been drinking it off the ground and I don't know how much longer we can survive off it."

Kit nodded before even hearing the entire request. Anything in her power to help them, she was willing to do. And with Ren gone, she doubted anyone would oppose her. 

"I will, I promise."

"Thank you, Miss?"

"Kit," she finished for her. 

"Kaydel," the girl replied with her own name, nodding in acknowledgement that the two were now bound by this agreement. 

In another life, Kit may have made her introduction at a ball, and they could have spent the evening speaking about the latest ballet or opera they had seen. But these were no ordinary circumstances. 

Kaydel looked conspiratorially down to the end of the hall, near where Kit had descended the stairs. "You see that stone wall, all the way by the end of the stairs?"

"Yes."

"There's a latch, just below the torch on the wall - it's actually a door."

Kit looked back at the girl with brows raised. She never would have discovered that on her own. 

"Thank you, Kaydel."

Kit made to leave, but she was stopped when the girl began to speak again. 

"Though, they would have told you that, if you had been assigned to his medical care."

Oh. 

How had she overlooked that small detail?

Kit winced and turned back around, not daring to meet Kaydel's gaze. 

"You're one of us, aren't you?" she asked plainly. 

Kit's eyes nearly burst from their socket. How could she just make these assumptions for the whole dungeon to hear? 

And Kit did not actually know what she was. 

She knew she held no loyalty to the First Order anymore, save for several of its members. But she was not a Resistance member - no yet at least. It was as if Kit were in some sort of moral limbo, called to both sides but unable to give herself fully to one cause. 

She had no answer for the other girl, and simply gave her a pained expression before leaving to find where Poe was being held.

---

Sure enough, the grey stone façade gave way to another series of halls, with even smaller cells. These gave their inhabitants space only for sleeping or standing - as it was narrow and designed for only a single prisoner. 

All the cells Kit had passed by were empty, littered only by straw on the ground to prevent the mud from sinking in too deep. 

But in the far right corner, she heard rustling. 

"Poe?" she called out into the darkness. 

"I'm here," he spoke back. 

Rushing over to the bars of his enclosure, she held one tightly and tried to fit her head through to see him. 

"Kit? Is that you?" he asked, still blinking away the darkness from his eyes. 

"It's me. I've brought food. Are you hurt?"

"You're an angel," he said, accepting Kit's offering of the lemon tart she'd saved just for him. "And I'm fine - just a bit swollen," he said in between bites. 

She placed the torch on the wall. It was now that she could make out the purple outlining his left eye, puffy and enlarged from where he had fallen face first into the ground when Ren had dragged him through the courtyard. 

"How are the others," Poe asked, carrying on as if this were just any other conversation. 

"Uh, they're alright for now. I had some food that I snuck in for the children. It should keep them going until morning, at the least."

"Good. Good..." Poe trailed off, unsure what more to say.

Mustering her courage, Kit decided to just get on with it. 

"Poe... I need to ask... I need you to tell me about the Resistance," Kit said softly. 

He seemed to pause, coming closer to the bars and inspecting her quizzically. 

"Kit... if they've sent you to do their interrogations, you know I can't tell you anything," he said sadly.

"No- no, it's not like that. I want to know... because I want to help," she finally admitted. 

"Are you saying you want to join us? Leave the Order?"

Well, here it was, plain and simple. What was she trying to say?

"I can't exactly just leave, right now, but I can work from the inside. I can't let them continue to do this," Kit said, motioning to the dungeon around them. "And I cannot support that tyrant Kylo Ren."

He was silent for a moment, but appearing to recognise the truth behind her words, his face softened. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

She did not know if revealing the entirety of her story would earn her any favour with Poe, so she elected to omit her relationship with Ren from her explanation. 

"My whole life, I have been brought up to believe that the Order were the only ones who were capable enough to oversee the nation. I was born into a civil war with a Colonel for a father - and I was spoon-fed what I should believe, and how I should act. Even when the Order seized control, the fighting continued, and the propaganda only ramped up. But being here - watching the pain and the destruction that the Order has caused - it has made me realise that I cannot play an active part in it any longer."

It felt cathartic to finally admit that to someone. 

She saw a small smile form on Poe's lips. "Y'know, I had a feeling you weren't really one of them, deep down," Poe admitted. "I could see you thinking a little too long on my offer to run away, that night" he added, chuckling. 

She smiled back, glad that he had accepted her explanation. 

Though she still had another question to ask.

"But before we make a plan, I need to ask you something... personal," she said lowly. 

"If you're going to make me an offer of courtship, I'm sorry but an officer has already beat you to it," he said, still light-hearted. 

An officer? That was unexpected. But she would come back to that at a later time. 

She shook her head. "It's actually about what you said to me when we first met. Do you remember?"

He thought for a second. "I can't recall - though I'm sorry if it contained profanity. I think I had just been tortured."

She winced, remembering the injuries Ren had made to his body that night. 

"You said I looked awfully familiar. Like you had met me before."

Poe's eyes widened. "I did, didn't I?"

With a nod, she asked, "Who did you think I was, Poe?"

He drew in a deep breath. Kit almost wanted to cover her ears, lest she hear what her mind had been telling her since that morning. 

"Her name was Astelle. But we knew her as officer Bryne."

Kit's brain seized up. 

She'd had her suspicions, but to hear them confirmed was another thing. 

He was saying her mother's name. Her maiden name, Bryne. 

Poe had known her mother. 

And he knew her as officer Bryne?

"What... what do you mean?" Kit managed to get out as her head span.

"She was one of our finest; lived in and infiltrated enemy territory for years. You look a lot like her when she was younger; though we didn't see much of her towards the end."

"The end?" Kit said with a bit too much emotion for the cool façade she was attempting to maintain. 

Poe continued, "Somehow, she got word that the Order were staging a coup. On the eve of the takeover, she arrived here to warn us all, so that we could assist the palace. But she had taken ill on the road, riding for days on end. She didn't make it through the night."

Part of Kit's world crumbled before her very eyes. 

A small part of her had held onto hope that her mother was still out there - somewhere, off gallivanting with a new husband or family, but still alive. So to hear that she was truly gone destroyed something inside her. 

How jealous she was of other girls, who could go and cry on their mother's shoulder in moments like this. 

Now, more than ever, she needed her mum. 

"Kit, what's the matter - why're you crying?" Poe asked concernedly.

She had not even noticed when the tears fell, but she reached up to feel the wetness on her cheeks. Trying to wipe it away, she sniffled when they would not stop. 

"No... she can't have... she abandoned us because she didn't love us... not because of this..." Kit tried to reason with herself.

All that pent up hatred she had felt towards her mother for abandoning them suddenly morphed into guilt, now realising that she had never intended to do such a thing. 

Kit thought back to the night of her mother's leaving, now imagining the turmoil she must have felt in leaving her family to save countless other families from their doom. 

Is that why she had looked so distraught the night she left? Why her parents had argued? Had her father even known that his wife was a Resistance informant? It was highly likely that she was feeding the Resistance all of his military intel, Kit realised. 

Had that been why they had married?

"Kit, Kit! Take a deep breath - you're hyperventilating," Poe snapped her out of her spiral. 

Doing as he said, she gripped onto the cool metal of the bars and tried to focus on getting enough oxygen into her lungs. The soothing temperature of the metal took her mind off her crisis for a moment, but when she had been brought back to reality, it all came flooding back. 

"Can you please tell me what's wrong?" Poe pleaded. 

Kit sniffled again. "That woman, Astelle, she was my mother," Kit admitted out loud. 

Poe was shocked into silence. He seemed to be working through something in his thoughts, as he bore a concentrated thinking expression. 

"We thought that she had run off and abandoned us, for all these years. But now I know..." Kit finished. 

Poe sighed in pity. "Kit, I'm... I'm so sorry. I didn't even make the connection - none of us knew she had a family."

She tried again to wipe her eyes. It was useless. "It's alright... She married a colonel, so that's where all the intel must have come from. I just never knew that she was part of the Resistance."

So much of who Kit was now had been in response to her adolescence without her mother. Even her entire perception of relationships and love had been altered by her mother's disappearance - with Kit thinking it was because she had chosen her own freedom over the love of her children. 

It had been the main driver behind Kit's hesitance to ever have children of her own, lest they ever feel the pain she experienced as a child.

But now, she saw that her mother's actions had been out of love and duty - to potentially save the lives of others. And she must have had the intention of coming back. 

With her entire perspective on life shifting, Kit had to grapple with who she was now - and what she wanted to do with this knowledge.

Right now, though, she knew she had to help these people. 

"It looks like you're following in her footsteps, in that regard," Poe said softly, trying to lighten the mood. 

Kit smiled to herself. She supposed she was. And she was proud of it. She secretly hoped her mother would have been too.

"So, Dameron, what's the plan?"

---

A fortnight had passed, and at Kit's insistence to Mitaka, all prisoners had been provided with adequate food, water and chamber pots. In keeping true to her promise to Kaydel, she always received a knowing look from the girl whenever she ventured down into the cells. Kit had even been permitted to have her other nurses attend to their medical needs, which allowed her time with Poe to discuss their ongoing plan of escape. 

In the meantime, Kit had written to her sisters, more often than she usually would, if purely to keep her mind off both Kylo Ren and her mother. She told them about neither, but sill mentioned that she was feeling a little downcast, to not give too much away. Dany had replied once or twice, but Jayne had been uncharacteristically silent on her end. Mitaka seemed to be facing the same lack of correspondence, as he too had not had a reply for quite some time. Kit found that even stranger. 

As she revisited Poe every other day to check his progress, Kit tried her best to feed him any information about the Order's movements. The troops seemed to have stagnated for quite some time, as they were currently tasked with maintaining the occupancy of the fortress.

Despite this, Poe seemed to think that the tides of the war were shifting, and that another coup was on the horizon. He had been in First Order custody for quite a while now, but from what he could discern from the others before they were separated, the Resistance had something big planned. 

But their first objective was to escape. If not all of them, then at least Poe. 

Guards had begun to inspect the nurse's bags, as they would frequent the cells quite often - so transcribing a note to send or providing him a key was out of the question. But today, Kit had placed several large hair pins in her updo, and sleekly removed them to place into his pockets as she was attending to his eye. 

She did not know if he was any good with a lock pick, but it was the best she could do. Kit caught his grin when he felt the items enter into his possession, and wondered what he had planned. 

Feeling very pleased with herself, Kit exited the cells, and made for the surface once more. It had become quite the thrill to be working for the opposing side in secret, and she wondered if her mother had felt so giddy at the potential of being caught. 

Her smile must have been quite pronounced, for someone had spied it. 

"You're looking awfully happy for someone who has just been in the cells," said Hux from behind her. 

"Oh! I'm sorry, I did not see you there, General," she said, flustered at his sudden appearance. 

He cocked an eye at her use of his title, seeming to think they were past that. 

In truth, Kit had been avoiding him a little, to try and put distance between them. Though she knew she was doing the morally right thing in helping the Resistance, she still felt sorrow at the thought of betraying those she cared for - especially Hux. 

I had been hard, especially when she had yearned for his company. But she could not look him in the eye and lie.

"I fear I have not been able to speak with you much, these days. You seem thoroughly occupied whenever I seek your company," Hux admitted, falling into step with Kit. 

She looked to her feet, silently ashamed of her actions. Hux was a friend, and she had treated him poorly, though it was not her intention. 

"For that I am sorry. I just cannot seem to delegate tasks all too well," she attempted to reason. 

He seemed to accept that explanation, though, as he nodded in agreement. 

"I can sympathise with you there," he chuckled, and Kit immediately perked up at the sound. 

How she had missed it. How she had missed him. 

This 'distance' thing wasn't going to work.

She might as well enjoy his company while she had the privilege of it. 

"I see that you're wearing the coat," Kit said almost without thinking. 

Hux grinned to himself. "The one you stole from me after your dip in the lake, then proceeded to mend? Yes I am," he admitted proudly. "And you did a fine job of it - it's like new," he said, brandishing the red initials she had sewn onto the cuff of the sleeve.

She grinned with him, glad that he wore it with such pride. "It used all my thread, but it was well worth it, I see."

"Very. You even fixed all the pockets - which reminds me, I have something for you," he said as he reached into the interior pocket closest to his chest. Drawing out a white envelope, he handed it over to Kit. "It was my excuse to see you in the first place," he said sheepishly, as she inspected the letter. 

She tried not to blush at that statement, attempting to read who the sender was. 

"Oh, it's from Dany. That's odd - I only had one from her arrive yesterday," Kit said as she broke the seal on the envelope. 

Drawing out the page from its confines, Kit was met with unruly script, clearly written in haste due to its poor legibility. 

"Now what on earth could she be-" Kit stopped in her tracks at what she read. 

It could not be. 

This had to be a lie. 

She read it again. 

Hux must have noticed a change on her face. "Katherine, what is wrong?"

But she had no words. 

With hands shaking, the letter fell from Kit's grasp and landed on the cobblestone. 

And there Kit stood, paralysed by the contents of the letter.

Notes:

Oooooo what could be in that letter???

And also I promise I will include some proper smut soon lol - this is a very slow burn, but it's coming (soon-ish).

Chapter 20: Runaway

Notes:

Hey I'm back! Sorry this one took so long - I've had a lot of stuff going on! It's a bit shorter, but I had to break this one up otherwise it would have been massive.
Enjoy!

Growing up the eldest daughter, Kit never had the privilege of an older sibling. Many things in her life, she had learnt from her own mistakes. Like how she'd been caught by the maids so often that she eventually discovered the best route to sneak to the kitchen. Or how she had nearly lost her voice in finding the perfect fake cough to mimic a fever so she could avoid her music lessons.  Kit had even nearly fallen down a badger hole trying to find the best places for hide and seek, but she had instead found a small tabby cat hiding there, which she would secretly visit when she could get away.  

Kit had of course shared these precious pieces of knowledge with her younger sisters, holding their hands as she snuck them into the pantry at night, or hushed them as they hid in her secret alcove where the nanny could not find them. 

Even from a young age, Kit had been determined to ensure that her sisters would not make the same mistakes she did. 

But who could have foreseen this?

 

Sister,

Since my last letter, something most unexpected and egregious has occurred; though I fear I may have alarmed you - know that Canady, Vivienne and I are well. What I have to say relates to Jayne. An express post came at almost midnight last night, just as we had retired, from Jayne, to inform us that she was gone off to Coruscant with a man; to own the truth, with Commander Kylo Ren! 

Imagine our surprise - especially when we all believed her affections were towards the Colonel. Surely the Commander must see that he is making an imprudent match for himself? Rumour has it that he is to be next in line for the throne, so he would be wise to marry a noblewoman of greater standing - not our younger sister who has scarcely said a polite word to anyone since she was born. 

Under different circumstances, I may have even encouraged the match - but she did not dance more than twice with him at the ball last week before they had run off! Had a courting period and engagement been announced, this match would have served our family well - but as they remain unwed, she brings nothing but shame to all of us. We have not made such matters public yet, to ensure our reputation, but Jayne's absence has been noted and I can only continue to make excuses for so long. 

What Ren wants with her, I cannot say - though it surely is not money, for he has plenty of that. The only viable solution I can see is that they wed, yet we have had no word of such event. 

Please, Kit, I implore you - come home and fix this. You have always known what to do, and my husband is unwilling to assist as he believes she has brought this upon herself. Ask your officer friends or even Mitaka to locate them; we shall need all the help we can get. 

I beg of you, come quickly,

Dany. 

 

Her sister. Her baby sister whom she had practically raised - whom she had taught to read.

How could Ren be so cruel? Though she doubted Jayne would have gone along unwillingly, Kit was certain Ren had manipulated her somehow. Because she knew that beast was not capable of love.

This was what he had meant. 

You can't even imagine how much pain I could bring you if you left me.

The words echoed throughout her mind, finally seeing them come to fruition. 

This was all because of her. If Kit had just played along and accepted Ren...

No, she thought; she was not to blame. She'd had every right to leave that dangerous situation - to leave that dangerous man. He was the guilty party. He had threatened her, made her cry - even left bruises on her skin. Kit would not allow herself to feel guilty for this situation.

It was all because of him.

Upon this realisation, Kit moved from guilt to white hot anger, though still underpinned with a general distress about the situation itself. 

Her knuckles burned while she picked up the letter from the ground, squeezing her fists until they were pale. But they were suddenly soothed by the feel of a hand coming to release them. 

"Kit, please, what has happened?"

As she looked into the eyes of the man who had come to her rescue not once, but multiple times, she was suddenly all too aware that this may be the last time they see one another for quite some time. For if she were to leave the army fortress now, there was no telling what Ren would do to her and her family - though she doubted it would end with things returning to normal. And now, mixed in with her plot to help the Resistance, everything was stacked against her. 

So, with a sigh of defeat, she allowed him to unclench her hands and placed the letter in his grasp. 

"Read for yourself," she said softly. 

She did not know if he did it consciously, but Hux kept one hand holding hers while the other took the letter to begin reading. Upon reaching the revelation of Ren's involvement, he grasped her ever so tighter, and finally released her at the conclusion of the note.

"That bastard. I...I knew he was a scoundrel, but this is low even for him," Hux said, now sharing in Kit's anger. As he took a moment to re-read the letter, he looked over to find Kit with an odd expression of calm on her features. "Forgive me, Kit, but you seem awfully... alright, given what you have just discovered."

"He wants a reaction; Ren wants me to hurt. So if I give in, it's like he's won," Kit said, voice barely betraying her tightly concealed anger. 

Hux creased his brow. "But she is your sister - you would be justified in any reaction you may have."

"No. I cannot dwell on it, I must return to Arkanis and fix this."

As she made to leave, the General turned with her, taking her arm gently to stop her. "Kit, I implore you to think this through. Realistically, what can you do for her?"

"I beg your pardon?" she said, whirling around on him, with her arm still in his. 

He released her slowly. "I said, what can you do for her? What will your being in Arkanis do for your family that Canady cannot?" he iterated once more. 

She could not believe this. Of all the people to oppose her, she had thought Hux would be the last. How could he not see that Kit was needed back in Arkanis? She would find a way to fix it, like she always did - since she was young, it had always been her role to do so. 

"The only reason she is even in this mess is because I turned him down." She saw Hux begin to rebut, but cut in, "And yes, I know that I am not responsible for his actions, but I cannot help but feel that I have a duty to Jayne as her sister."

Hux scoffed in astonishment. "Have you considered that maybe this is what she wants - that she is not entirely blameless in this situation? You have told me enough of Jayne's character to make such a suggestion plausible."

Kit scowled at him. For the first time since they had reached their mental truce, he was vexing her. 

"You insult my sister? You do not even know her. If you did, you would know that she would never agree to such an arrangement without the promise of marriage," Kit said with a harsh tone. "She may be a flirt, but she is not stupid - she cares for her reputation too much." 

At that, Kit was left lightly seething, waiting for Hux's equally harsh response that she had not seen for some months but knew that he had within him. 

In the silence that followed, she mentally prepared rebuttals to any argument he would throw her way, but none came. Instead, he simply looked down to her with a sad sort of pity.

"Katherine, this is not your burden - it is not your problem to solve," he said with a small sigh. "Do not for a second think that I doubt your strength, but the actions of your sister are not your responsibility. If anything, Canady should be the one taking action."

"But..."

"You have a life here that you have built for yourself. And of course you care for your sister - but to place the burden of that on you alone is selfish."

"Hux, I cannot just stay here while my family faces ruin," she said in barely a whisper, not meeting his eyes.

"I know." His eyes scanned across every inch of her face, committing each freckle, bump and ridge to memory. 

She looked up at him now. "Which is why I am still going." 

Chuckling, he shook his head at her stubbornness and said, "But you will not go alone."

"I cannot ask that of you - you are needed here."

"This concerns Ren, so it concerns me too. I shall also inform Mitaka, on your sisters request."

Kit cringed inwardly. "He may not take the news so well..."

"Oh?"

She sighed. "I had thought they shared something of a romance between them, but it appears not. He may be quite heartbroken at the news."

"I see."

"But I would rather he hear it from me than through idle gossip. Or his boss," she added with a sad glint of humour. 

"I cannot argue with that," he shook his head. "I shall muster some horses and supplies for the journey while you inform him."

Handing her back the note, they shared a look of encouragement. They lingered within each other's gaze for far too long, but neither could seem to break away - their trance ending only when they gave one another a nod and set to work. 

---

"My good fellow, I do not mean to be brash, but you seem to be one horse short," Mitaka said in between sniffles, looking now at only two horses. Her cousin had been greatly upset by the contents of the letter, yet also recognised the urgency with which he was needed. So with no time to dry his tears, he set about making the proper arrangements to ensure the base was left in good hands upon the departure of himself and the General. Kit had also sought out Rey and placed her in charge once more; a role she was becoming quite familiar with. 

Slinging a bag of what looked like food across the saddle of one of the horses, Hux followed it up with another, much larger bag that contained their clothing. 

"On such short notice, these were all that could be spared, Colonel," Hux said as he tightened the straps of the satchels.

"Ah," Mitaka replied, but the sentiment did not meet his eyes. 

Sensing the despair that her cousin was feeling, Kit came up beside him and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. She had never been good at dealing with her own emotions - let alone that of others, but in this moment she recognised that he needed someone there for him. 

"It will be alright, Dopheld. We will find the answer to this," Kit said to him gently. 

Still looking at the ground, he scuffed his boot toe into the dirt. "Yeah? Do you think she's in danger?" he said in the softest voice imaginable.  

Kit sighed. "If I know Jayne, there is a high chance that Ren is the one in danger," she said, trying to lighten the mood. Though she did not necessarily believe her statement, it seemed to cheer him up slightly, even earning her a small chuckle. 

"Alright, that is the last of the supplies. We have enough food for about a week, but we shall stop to rest at inns along the way where we can procure more if needed."

Kit nodded, adjusting her gloves nervously before they set out. 

Mitaka piped in once more, "I fear we have not discussed our riding situation," and gestured between the horses. 

One was a deep chestnut colour, with a dash of white down the front of its face and above its hooves. The other had a much more slender build, with jet black coat that seemed to absorb all light. It resembled pure shadow. 

Hux sighed. "Well Colonel - choose a horse, sit on it, and ride."

Kit tried to hold back a smile. 

The Colonel rolled his eyes. "So  you and I are to share a steed then, General? You must promise not to hold too tight; it is a long journey, you know."

Her cousin seemed to be deflecting the situation with humour, but it was only making Hux more exasperated by the minute. 

"Fine. You and Kit shall ride together, and I shall have some peace and quiet for once," he retorted. Then as an afterthought, he added, "Besides, after the second day, I shall leave you and journey to Coruscant where they are reportedly staying. I shall try and negotiate with Ren while you return to your family."

Kit's heart sank at the mention that Hux would not be accompanying them the whole way of their journey, but she appreciated his willingness to assist her regardless. Still, the image of her riding pressed up against Hux for hours on end sent a thrill through her. She had already ridden with him once; sopping wet in her sheer nightgown and blanketed by his own coat. Kit wished she could have appreciated it then. 

Moving over to the chestnut, Kit gave its face a gentle stroke before dragging her hand along its neck and up its back to the saddle. Pulling down on it to test its strength, she then put her foot in the holster and hauled herself on top of it, mindful of her skirts. Sitting astride the horse, she looked down at the two men. 

"Well, what are we waiting for?"

 

 

Notes:

I told ya it was Pride and Prejudice inspired hehe.

Let me know what you think!

Chapter 21: Wedding Bells

Notes:

Just wanted to say thank you all so so much for still sticking around to read this! 2000 hits is insane (esp for a Hux fic - I thought I was the only one who liked that crazy little ginger.) I've planned out the rest of the story in depth now, and it looks like this will have a total of about 30 chapters. So this one marks the beginning of the end! Enjoy!

"It's been too long since I've had a proper glass of wine," Mitaka said, clinking his near-empty glass with Kit's very full one. 

"Funny, I seem to recall you had one not five minutes ago," Hux commented, turning his attention now to the meal in front of him. 

The three of them had made good time that day - riding for several hours with only minimal breaks to rest and feed the horses. The weather had held off fortunately, and Kit found it actually quite pleasant at times despite the nature of the journey. 

Looking through the window of the dining room, Kit watched as the last rays of sun made their way below the horizon. That was the first day finished. The inn was not too crowded given its location so far away from anything, and with a modest wine selection and plenty of room for the horses, it proved a sufficient place to end their day's journey.   

As Kit stretched her legs under the table, sore from riding all day, she pondered what the future had in store for her. 

What would be waiting at Canady Hall? Dany would of course be in hysterics, and from the sound of her letter, Canady would prove to be of little help. Why the man would not provide any assistance puzzled Kit - for surely he cared for his sister-in-law's reputation, or at least cared for his family? 

Though she was dreading being back in the place she had come to resent, Kit could not deny that she was looking forward to seeing Vivienne again, and hugging her sister. She wondered if they had missed her similarly. Jayne had been the one to keep up most of the correspondence, with letters coming at least weekly, while Dany seemed to write to her only when there was something of importance to say. Kit did not mind; she still sent both of her sisters a weekly letter, and on occasion would write to Vivienne herself - though she was very rarely met with a reply. 

Until leaving for the army, Kit had never known how difficult it was to keep up a connection with family when she did not see them every day. Given that it was the first time any of the three sisters had been separated from the other, it must have come as a shock to all of them. 

But Kit possessed a gnawing feeling that her sisters secretly enjoyed her being gone - that they had merely put up with her for all these years out of necessity, and after being free of her for nearly a year decided that it was far more pleasant without her company. 

Unlike Dany, she was not in charge of running a household and maintaining connections with fellow officers' wives, or planning luncheons and tea parties. And unlike Jayne, Kit was neither gorgeous nor charismatic, nor was she the belle of every ball. 

She knew her sisters would always love her, but being so different in nature to both, how could they truly like her? 

Kit took a long sip of her wine. 

These were just spiralling thoughts with little to support them bar a few missed letters recently. In truth, it did not matter how her sisters felt towards her. Jayne would likely be married soon enough, and then both of them would be mothers before she knew it. Their lives would be entirely separate, and Kit would continue about her own. 

Adding to this fact, she was now technically on the other side of the war. As an unofficial Resistance operative, Kit would be excommunicated from Arkanis if her loyalties became known. And if Jayne were to wed Ren, she would also become queen in time. 

Kit wondered if Jayne would do so eagerly, if she learnt of their mother's true nature. 

"Please let me."

"Dopheld, you're drunk - I'm not entertaining this suggestion."

Kit was drawn back to her companions' discussion, noticing an exasperated General and a flushed Colonel who seemed intent on pleading with the former. 

"Hux, you must, I am begging you," he said now, with a whining tone that betrayed his desperation and drunkenness.  

The General looked to Kit for a moment, before moving back to Mitaka. "How is it that you plan to bargain with the Commander? Hm? What power do you hold over him that would coerce him to relinquish the girl? Let alone-"

"I love her," Mitaka interrupted before Hux could cease his barrage of questions. 

"And?" Hux shrugged, failing to see how it would assist them.

"What do you mean, 'And?' - can you not see how much I care for her?" Mitaka said somewhat enraged. "You would not understand what it is like, to adore someone so much, to long for them when they are not near. And all the while, knowing that you cannot have them," he said the last line in sadness. 

Hux was looking down into the crimson depths of his wine glass, swirling the liquid while they sat in the echo of Mitaka's confession. Kit did not miss how the General's gaze had flicked to her briefly during the Colonel's impassioned speech, likely to gauge her reaction to his actions. 

No other reason. 

"Besides, once Kit is escorted to Canady Hall, we shall both meet them in Coruscant anyway. Just please - allow me to leave tomorrow. I must see her. I cannot wait the extra week." That was Mitaka's final pitch, and it seemed to be working because Hux appeared to be considering it. 

As the General toyed with a piece of potato on his plate, he finally gave in with a sigh. 

"I can imagine being in your position, and I would want to do the same. So I will allow it - but only if Kit approves."

She looked up from her own meal. "Me? Why would my opinion on the subject matter?"

Hux seemed to avoid her eyes, embarrassed. "Well, if Dopheld is to take my place, you will be without a proper chaperone while we ride the rest of the way to Arkanis together."

"Oh," she said quietly, coming to realise the implications of such an act. For an unwed girl to be without a chaperone was simply the highest form of impropriety - and to be without one whilst in the company of an unmarried man was all but inviting scandal. 

When she had been with the army, the presence of Mitaka and the other women had protected her modesty - or at least the appearance of it, given her less than proper interactions with Ren. Yet now, if she were to be seen galivanting with Hux, alone, it would do equally as much damage as Jayne's suspected elopement with the Commander. 

Mitaka slammed his wine glass to the table, and let out a stifled belch before looking between Hux and Kit quizzically. "It's an easy fix," he said, accent coming in thicker through his slurred words. "Jus' pretend to be married for a week. Mister and Missus Hux. No questions asked."

Both Kit and Hux gasped at the same time, immediately looking to the other and then back down with flushed cheeks. The mere suggestion that they pretend to be wed sent shockwaves through her, and Kit could not tell if they were from fear of the prospect... or excitement. 

"I-I could not ask her to do that," Hux stuttered out, taking a large swig from his glass. "What if we are recognised?"

"Simple - just don't wear that uniform everywhere you go," Mitaka said, flicking the collar of Hux's military dress shirt. 

He scoffed at that. "This," he said, straightening the collar back in place, "is how we were afforded three rooms and a bottle of wine on such short notice." 

From the panicked look on his face and nervous fidgeting, one would not recognise him as the fearless General Hux of the First Order. But Kit knew this man; this was Armitage Hux - piano player, excellent dancer and at his core, gentle hearted. So much so that it often presented as bashfulness when certain conversation topics were brought up. 

"What do you think, Mrs Hux?" Dopheld asked, leaning towards Kit and looking like he might almost topple over. 

Catching his shoulder and sitting him back upright, she did not even have time to fully process what he had just called her. But the mortified look on Hux's face was all she needed to understand. 

"Well, if you are set on leaving us tomorrow, then there is little else we can do, is there?" Kit sighed. 

Hux whirled his head to her. "So you are agreeing to this outlandish plan?" he all but shrieked. 

Taking in his increasingly ruffled countenance, Kit chuckled. "Well, this whole chaperone nonsense is not going to stop us from reaching Arkanis. We will be making the journey together regardless; it is all just dependent upon the lengths you are willing to go to to protect my honour." She was quite emboldened now - the wine loosening her lips. 

"Ha! That's the spirit," laughed Mitaka. 

Hux rested his head in his hands. "Can I not pretend to be a family member?"

Immediately Mitaka was waving the thought away. "I'm afraid your northern features are far too distinct from Kit's; the hair is a giveaway."

He groaned. "And when they notice the lack of a ring?" 

Mitaka pointed to Hux's left little finger. "Just use that."

Kit had never noticed it before, but as Hux brandished his left hand she saw upon his last finger a thin silver band that looked as though it were quite weathered, given the darker oxidized parts.  

Pulling it from its place, the General held the ring up for inspection, twirling it between his fingers. "It is hardly fit for a wedding band," he mused. 

As it glinted in the light, kit could admire the small details that surrounded the piece. Swirling around the band like vines, intricate pieces of silver filigree wove together in a raised texture. Having clearly seen many years, the silver underneath had darkened, yet provided an almost beautiful contrast to the design above it. 

The ring was markedly feminine, and she wondered how Hux had come to acquire such a piece. The thought of it belonging to a first love or a school-yard crush made her feel uneasy, not wanting to mar the memory of another woman. Kit made it a point not to ask. 

"There you go. And now, with the power vested in me, by no-one whatsoever, I pronounce you fake husband and wife. We will do away with the kissing for tonight, but you may now present the ring," Mitaka announced to the nearly empty dining room. 

Kit chuckled at his nonsense, but was silenced from her humour at the feel of Hux's hand gently grasping hers from atop the table.

"May I?" he asked quietly, looking into her eyes for confirmation.  

They hovered there in space for what seemed like eternity, with her hand in his. 

Kit had been in this situation before. Ren down on his knees, slipping the gaudy ring onto her finger as she held back tears of fear. It had been gold, last time - topped with a ruby larger than her thumbnail. Even from his jewellery choice, it was clear that Ren had never truly known her - or even cared to ask. 

But strangely enough, this aged piece of silver with simple embellishments was gorgeous to her, and she could see aspects of herself within it. 

She noticed now that Hux was still waiting for a response - and even though it was a fake marriage, he still seemed eager to learn whether she would accept him. 

The fact that he asked her in the first place without any underlying threats or expectations was enough for her to say yes. 

Giving a small smile that he seemed to try and hide, Hux slid the ring onto her finger, lingering when it had found its new home to brush lightly over the details one last time before forfeiting it to Kit for good. 

It was often said that the wedding ring rested upon the left ring finger because it lay atop a vein connected directly to the heart. This must have been a lie, for otherwise Kit's finger would have swollen and fallen from her hand at the rate her heart was beating. 

Such a simple act; asking. But to her it meant the world. 

Kit felt listened to. Heard. It was something that she did not get to experience during her time with Ren. Though oddly enough it was what initially drew her to him - this false impression that he was willing to learn who she was, to truly know her. When he had asked, "Who are you? What do you most desire from your life?", it had all been nothing but a ploy to endear her to him. Kit wondered if he had even listened to her reply. 

Evidently not, for his first thought after had been to tie her down with marriage and children. 

But thinking upon it now, the prospect of marriage could seem so... freeing with the right person. Putting herself in the place of the real Mrs Hux, she envisioned a life that was actually quite happy. She and Armitage were of a similar mind in several aspects, though each still possessed an individuality that would facilitate eager discussion and debate. They had their own interests, and passion for their work. But what Kit found most enticing was his kindness. A stark contrast to the rude General she had overheard at the ball, the man she had come to know would always be gentle with her. Of that she had no doubt. Regarding children, Kit was at first met with her instinctual reluctance. She had vowed to break the cycle her mother had begun by causing Kit and her sisters so much pain. But knowing what she now knew of her mother's 'abandonment', Kit had to reframe her thinking entirely. 

There had never been any intention to cause them pain. She had still loved them. There was no cycle of pain to break, but a selfless love to uphold. 

Kit had once even imagined motherhood to be a living cage, robbing a woman of all identity but that of a mother. Yet that image had been conjured by her mind in a bout of self pity, when she had tried to convince herself that she would be perfectly content to spend her days alone and as a governess. When she envisioned Armitage as a father, she could not imagine him allowing that. Though reserved when in unknown company, he would be devoted and active within the lives of their children, and would adore being a father. 

Kit wondered silently whether the children would have his gorgeous fiery hair, or if they would be blessed with his lovely green eyes. As long as they shared some part of him, she would be happy. 

Despite having just envisioned a whole life with the General, it was that last thought that caught her off guard. 

She was attracted to him. 

Very, very, much. 

And they had to spend a week together. Alone. Posing as a married couple. 

Kit could have fainted then and there. 

 

Notes:

Kit's really out here imagining a whole life and kids with him, to only realise that she likes him after the fact.

What could this revelation mean for the next chapter I wonder...

Chapter 22: Nightgowns

Notes:

Enjoy!

"While you seem to have sobered up since last night, please promise me that you will make no rash decisions in my absence," Hux requested, looking up to the Colonel perched on his horse. 

Her cousin was practically itching to get away, and it took every ounce of effort to get him to eat breakfast before departing. 

Mitaka seemed to consider his request. "I could promise that, but we both know I'd be lying," he said with a chuckle as the horse stood in place. 

Hux gave him a knowing look, and shook his head in amusement. 

After her revelation last night, Kit could not look the General in the eye. Trying her hardest to avoid his gaze, she spoke with the Colonel directly. "Be wary of Ren. There must be something that he is using to coerce her into this - I cannot believe that Jayne would just willingly go. You must be careful that it does not come to light."

"I will try," he said now more seriously. 

"And please hug her for me. Or reprimand her. I do not yet know how to feel about this entire situation."

Offering a sad look, he leant down to give her hand a squeeze. "Know that I will do everything in my power to protect your sister. I do not care if it comes down to a duel-"

"Which it will not," Hux interjected quickly.

"Or a fight-"

"Which, once again, it will not," Hux re-iterated, and Kit thought she could see a vein bulging on his forehead. He seemed very much like a grumpy father trying to reason with their toddler, and she found it strangely amusing. 

"The point being," Mitaka said, shooting Hux a look, "that I adore your sister and will not let any harm come to her." 

They were all stunned into silence for a short while, unprepared for her cousin's sincerity. He seemed to notice the shift in the air, for he chuckled nervously before turning around in his horse. 

"Ah. Well, you have probably both heard enough of my nagging, so I think it is time I make my departure. Safe travels to Arkanis," he said as he began to leave the stables. Just as he had made his way out onto the cobbled path of the street, he turned and said over his shoulder, "And good luck with the marriage! If you are contemplating baby names, I think Dopheld is an excellent choice!" 

Kit dared not look to the General, and he seemed to share the same sentiment. 

In the wake of Mitaka's leave, both had merely stood stock still, without speaking to the other. 

It had been a joke - right? Mitaka was just teasing, and there was no intention behind it. There was no way that he could tell that she had secretly begun to harbour feelings for the man beside her, and had even imagined a family with him just last night.

She was reading too deep into it. 

Passing remarks were all they were. But if that were the case, then why was her General presently standing as if called to attention by a superior officer in training camp? 

Attempting to ease his discomfort with humour, she jokingly said, "Don't worry - I much prefer Alexander. Or Maria for a girl." 

Kit was quite pleased with her quick remark, but it did not seem to have the desired effect, for the General simply turned a darker shade of red. 

"Mhm. Yes those are... those are quite... lovely names," he finally got out, saying the last words with a more relaxed sigh. 

He gave her a half smile and chuckled to himself, probably at the absurdity of the situation. 

She mirrored it, delighting in the sound and never wishing for it to end. How anyone could ever perceive this man as cold and uptight, she did not know. Yes there were certainly times where he could be strict, or even intimidating, but that was required from him as a General. If he were allowed to just be Armitage for a time, she had no doubt that anyone would fall in love. 

"Well, we had best not keep your family waiting. It is still a few days' ride," he said, breaking them out of their laughter. 

They had already packed their belongings before bidding Mitaka adieu, so all that was needed was for them to depart. Hux's horse - the one that resembled pure shadow - was led out into the courtyard, where Hux checked his saddle one last time. 

He seemed to finish fidgeting with it before pausing momentarily. 

"Is something the matter?" Kit asked.

"It's just... I do not how to say this... Will you be more comfortable if I should sit in front and you... hold me? Or - or would you prefer to sit in front and I..." He was back to his stumbling. 

Kit thought about it for a moment and found that she did not mind; both options seemed equally delightful. Though she supposed that the more proper position would be for her to sit behind him and hold onto him - as she had with Mitaka on their ride here. 

But, in truth, she and Hux were posing as a married couple - meaning that it would not be out of sorts at all for her to sit in front of him and be held in place by his arms. 

"Well... seeing as we are... married now, it would only make sense that we could ride in any position. But I think... I think newlyweds would probably choose the latter option? Don't you?" she reasoned with him, hoping that she was not being too obvious. 

He visibly gulped before nodding erratically. 

"Mhm, yes. Ah, I agree," he cleared his throat, "I agree. A husband would want to, uh... hold his new wife. And besides, if you fall asleep you needn't worry about falling off." 

Gosh, she loved how nervous this made him. It gave her hope that maybe he too shared even a fraction of her feelings toward him. 

"Well in that case, could you please assist me, husband?" she said the last word hesitantly, feeling foreign on her tongue. 

The word in question seemed to call him to action, for he immediately began to play his role; taking her waist in his hands and hoisting her up into the saddle. While short, Kit was by no means a small girl, yet the ease with which Hux lifted her was startling. Though fleeting, she basked in the feel of his touch as Kit adjusted her position so she was sitting side-saddle.

Once he could see that she was comfortable, he gave two absent minded pats to her calf as he rounded the other side of the horse. It must have been an unconscious act of comfort - intended for her or himself, she did not know. 

Before she could fully dissect this thought, she was met with a sudden pressure behind her as Hux hoisted himself into the saddle. As he slid down further, it was as if a warm blanket was encasing her body. Had he always been this warm? And had he always smelt this good?

She was now flushing deeply. 

Kit had thought that she would be able to keep her composure, but when he brought his hands around to take the reins - essentially boxing her in - she did not know how to react. 

With his chest pressed to her back, and his breath upon her neck, this was the closest they had ever physically been since the night they met. That evening, she had noticed none of this. But now, she was hyper aware of it all - especially the feeling of his crotch pressed into the swell of her behind. 

"Is this okay?" he asked her. 

All she could do was nod. 

"Please tell me if you wish to change positions. I believe the next town is several hours ride, so we shall be like this for a while."

At that, Hux gave a tug to the reins and the horse began to move. As she trod out into the street, there must have been a slight decline in the pavement, for Kit felt herself thrust forwards and about to slide off the saddle. 

And she would have, were it not for the strong arm that instantly came down to wrap around her stomach, pulling her back down into the saddle and towards his chest. 

"I've got you," he said all too quietly and directly into her ear. 

Hesitantly, she let one of her own hands come to rest atop his, showing her thanks for his attentiveness. 

That must have been the prompt he needed to get them moving, for he put the horse into a proper trot as the small inn faded away into the distance. 

---

For the first hour, they spent the journey in silence. The awkwardness of the situation had dissipated after the first thirty minutes, and it had become a companionable sort of silence, with each understanding that neither had anything terribly important to share. However, Kit was reminded of his presence behind her with each large gallop the horse would make, thrusting him forward into her. 

Is this what married women felt like?

At some point, she had to laugh about it; the situation in its entirety. 

"What?" he asked, craning his neck to try and see what had been the cause of her sudden outburst. 

"I'm sorry, I am still trying to comprehend how we got into this mess. All of it, actually," she said in between giggles. "It all started at that ball, I think. Where I danced with Ren, and you were insulting my family-"

"Which I have apologised for profusely, and regret deeply," Hux added, but Kit could hear the smirk in his voice. 

"Yes, yes - that's all in the past. And then the dinner party, where we played a duet and you walked out on me. Come to think of it, I see why I disliked you back then. Knowing you as I do now, it's like you were not your true self in those early months."

"Ah, well I certainly do not have the talent of conversing easily with those I have never seen before. I cannot catch their tone of conversation, or appear interested in their concerns, as I often see done."

She grinned. "I think my pestering eventually broke through that shell."

"I would not call it pestering. You were... defiant - which I could tell was in response to my poor introduction. I had wanted to apologise very early on, but... my pride would not allow it."

"Wait, how early on?"

He hissed in a breath, as if trying to recall. "From the moment I saw you at camp. You had been on my mind since our last meeting, and then suddenly you were there. You may recall that I stumbled during my speech. It was because I saw you."

"Oh." 

She had been on his mind? Surely it was purely because he had been remorseful of his actions towards her. But it still meant that she had occupied his thoughts. Maybe - just maybe, he had thought about her in a romantic way. If only for a second.

"And I am sorry that it took me this long to admit to it. Between dealing with Ren, and this entire war, you have been one of the few good things in my life."

She smiled to herself, attempting to hide her darkening cheeks while they fell back into the comfortable silence they had begun their journey in.  

---

At some point, Kit had seized control of the reins. 

Though she had been an avid horse rider in her youth, it had been some time since her last ride and it clearly showed. 

"When I suggested we pick up the pace, I am not sure that this is what I had in mind," Hux said frantically, holding onto Kit with both hands now. 

She had quickly become familiar with the sensation, and his hold no longer felt foreign and scandalous, but rather a constant presence there to protect her.

"Relax. I am simply ensuring our timely arrival."

Somehow, the horse had entered into a break-neck speed, galloping through the forested road with such momentum that the trees were rendered a green blur.  Though it initially frightened her, she quickly grew to love the feeling, basking in the way the wind blew the curls free from her updo and rustled her skirts. 

He simply grinned at her. 

"Of that I have no doubt."

---

"What is her name?" Kit asked as she pet the horse's neck.

They had returned to their previous arrangement, with Hux now in control of the steed, and moving along at a much more reasonable pace. 

He sighed. "You must not laugh. I was given this horse upon completion of my officer training and I was desperate for my peers' approval."

"Oh, come now - it can't be that bad?"

She could feel him cringe behind her. "Oh it can."

"What is it then?"

"Finalizer."

"Oh. Oh Armitage that is quite terrible," Kit said in between uncontrollable laughter. 

"I call her Liza. Though the official documents remain unchanged," he said dejectedly. 

She could not stop another bout of laughter from overtaking her, falling forward in the saddle. 

Overcome with the same sentiment and a little bit of embarrassment, Hux joined her, laughing into the back of her neck and unknowingly holding her ever so tighter to his body. 

---

"So, what will our cover story be?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"What do we say if anyone asks - about us?"

He scoffed. "We shall tell them nothing. They do not have a right to know about our lives."

She rolled her eyes. 

"Yes, but for the sake of appearances, I think we should agree on a story, like where we met and when we were married."

He seemed to consider it for a moment. 

"Why not keep most of it the same, with some minor alterations?"

She chuckled. "So we first met when you saved me from falling in a pond, then we were both stationed at the same army camp where we fell hopelessly in love and got engaged?"

"Something like that."

"And remember, you are not a General - merely an officer."

Now Hux laughed, "What will they think of me? Still an officer at thirty-four. They will pity you, for your poor choice of husband."

"Well I think he's alright."

He hummed. "And what were we naming our future children again? Alexander and Maria?"

"Oh how sweet, you remembered!" she said in a playfully mocking tone. 

"Any reason for those names?" he inquired. 

"Ah, not really. I hadn't exactly thought about it too much. Maria was my grandmother's name, and Alexander... well, it sounded a little bit like Armitage." 

He turned his head to her, almost not believing what she had heard. "You would not name our son after your father?"

There had been no malice in his words, simply curiosity. Traditionally, names of parents were the usual choice - especially for someone as esteemed as Kit's father had been. In the past, she may have gladly named a child after him. But given her recent faltering in loyalty to the First Order, she could not bring herself to do it, knowing that he had aided in the success of the Order. 

That suddenly reminded her: her allies in the dungeon. Kit wondered if Poe had made use of the hairpin she had slipped him before her departure. In truth, she had not known that she would be absent so soon, and he was probably wondering where she had journeyed to. Had she known, she would have made a greater effort to organise an escape. 

And yet, things had just become overwhelmingly more complicated. 

With her newly realised affection for the General, she could not give her loyalty completely to the Resistance without betraying him. 

How could she even do such a thing?

But Kit had been down this route before. Though she may not have admitted it at the time, her desire for Ren had inadvertently led her to join the Frist Order Army. And it is what had kept her there for some time. Then his actions had made her want to leave. 

For too long, she had been centring men within her life, and allowing them to drive her decisions. And though she did care deeply for Hux, Kit knew that she had to put her duty to the Resistance first. 

Because what hope was there for she and Hux? Even if the feeling was mutual, and she decided to put her Resistance loyalties behind her to be with him, she had still handed over First Order information. She was known to the Resistance now, and could easily be found out if such knowledge came into the wrong hands. 

And not to mention how he would react if he ever found out. 

Kit knew that Hux would not be violent like Ren, but she could not deal with the hurt that she would cause him. To see that look of pure sadness and betrayal across his features was not something Kit would ever wish for. When she was eventually found out, her betrayal as a friend would still be painful - but doing that to a lover was another kind of pain. 

She only longed to see him happy. And if that meant distancing herself from him, so be it. She could still admire and long for him from a distance, but anything further was out of the question. Things were difficult enough as they were. 

How had her mother done it? Lived her entire marriage under the guise of a loyal Colonel's wife, all the while feeding information to the Resistance? 

Had her parents even truly loved each other? Or had her mother chosen him as a husband in order to secure a constant line of information?

"Well, would you, Kit?"

"I'm sorry?" she asked, brought back to the present, but completely forgetting the initial question. 

"I asked if you would name a future son after your father."

"Oh! Well, I am not sure that Otto is a fitting name for a child. Come to think of it, even for an old man," she chuckled nervously. 

That seemed to answer his question, and he simply hummed to himself. 

She let out a silent sigh. 

Distance. 

---

After several more hours of riding broken up only by short meal breaks, they finally reached their lodging for the night: a modest hotel in a small village just outside Nabooshire. Unlike the inn, this place was far more crowded, and Kit mused that it was their first time back in proper society since the ball. 

Though the Order had been stationed nearby for a time, Kit doubted that they would be recognised given their current attire. Instead of her usual grey nursing smock, she wore one of her old cotton day dresses she had brought with her. A pattern of small flowers adorned the white fabric that reached to just below her ankles. And unlike the nurses' uniform, the dress showed her arms and a tasteful amount of cleavage. To top it all off, she wore a simple straw bonnet to cover her hair. This had been her every day attire back at Canady Hall, though now it somehow felt foreign on her body. 

The same could likely be said for Hux. 

Sporting the attire of a gentleman, he had traded the black general's uniform and greatcoat for a dark blue waistcoat and a grey tailcoat, accompanied by a tightly wound cravat that he was awfully unfond of. And like any gentleman would, he wore a felted top hat. 

To the observer, they looked just like any other married couple of proper society. 

If only they knew the truth. 

After stabling the horse, the pair of them had dared to venture inside the old building, walking arm in arm as was proper. Kit secretly relished in this, and wondered if any of the hotel's other visitors could sense her adoration for the man beside her. 

Adoration that she would be best to tone down, if she were ever to assist in overthrowing the First Order.

Despite it all, she allowed herself some small pleasures, admiring the delicate carvings along the wooden panels of the grand entrance and accepting smiles from other ladies with their husbands. Maybe, just for tonight, she could pretend it was all real. 

"Good evening, sir. How may I assist you?" 

An old man with quite the astonishing moustache stood behind a wooden counter, pen in hand and ready to take their booking. 

Hux cleared his throat, ready to play his part. "I am-" he began, before quickly looking to Kit and realising his mistake,  "we are, looking to stay for one night, please." 

"Well, certainly. We have three room types available, the silver room, gold room and the diamond suite. The silver and gold rooms are both of the same size, though the gold room has a view of the valley. The diamond suite, however, comes with complimentary room service as well as its own private dining balcony." The man looked between the pair of them before continuing, "Most newlyweds do tend to choose it."

Hux's eyes nearly bulged from their sockets. Kit would have to step in.

"Oh!" she chuckled, "How could you tell?"

The man set his pen down and gave them a warm smile. "You have that look about you," nodding to Hux, "and that nervousness." Kit thought she had imagined it, but it looked like the man gave Hux a wink. The General instinctively grabbed Kit's hand. Seeming to sense Hux's embarrassment, the man followed it up with "Oh, you needn't be shy. Give her a kiss!" 

So much for keeping her distance. 

Neither of them had time to prepare or react. Before Kit could even comprehend it, Hux was raising a hand to cup her cheek before leaning down to gently claim her mouth. Without her mind in control, she moved to deepen it instinctively, before Hux was pulling away. 

It had only been a small peck on the lips, but oh how she longed to bask in that feeling. She had only been given the smallest taste of him, and yet she was hungry for more. Had he enjoyed it? There had been no hesitation on his part when asked to kiss her - was this something he had been waiting for? 

Her questions appeared to be answered when she finally got a look at him. 

With bright pink dusting his cheeks, and pupils dilated to the size of saucers, Kit could practically feel the desire radiating off him. Not to mention his erratic breathing, moving his shoulders up and down at a rate that would be more typical of someone who had just ran five miles. 

And the way he was looking at her. 

She almost had to turn away, because he would not stop staring into her eyes. Across her face, down to her lips,  skating across the swell of her breast and then back up to her eyes again. 

She had never seen this side of him. He was hungry. 

And it was all for her. 

"Ah, newlyweds alright. That looked as though it were your first one!  So, which suite shall you be taking?"

Without looking away from her, he placed a small bag of coins onto the counter. "The diamond, please." 

---

By the time they brought their belongings up to their room, it was well past supper, and time for bed. They had eaten on the road not too long ago, so neither objected to retiring immediately. 

Only, there was one problem. 

There was but one bed. 

Larger than any Kit had ever seen, its lush blankets and pillows appeared like a welcoming cloud. Its four posters stood tall over the bed, supporting a fabric canopy that made it look all the more appealing. To either side of the head of the bed, there were two matching wooden tables, with enough space for a lady's hairbrush, or a gentleman's pocket watch to sit. 

This bed was evidently made to be inhabited by two. Laying side by side. Together. 

It only now dawned on Kit. 

How were they to do this? 

When she looked over to Hux - who had calmed down only partially from before - she noticed that he seemed to have the same thought. 

Nodding to the reclined chaise lounge by the balcony, he quickly said, "I shall sleep there."

"Are you sure? You are the one paying for the room. The bed is yours if you want it." 

He shook his head, though still smiling - back to his usual, less desire-fuelled self. "I do not mind. Given all that you have been through, you deserve it." Then he laughed to himself, "Consider it my apology for what we just had to do." 

She too chuckled at that, now a little shy too. 

"You were... quite good at it. Just so you know."

Why did she just say that? This was not distancing herself in any way. 

He seemed surprised by that, and looked up to her for a moment. He seemed equally as unsure what to do, and simply said a bashful, "Thank you." 

Now, how to proceed?

"I, uh, think I shall ready myself for bed then," Kit said, trying to initiate the end of this awkward night. 

He nodded, taking his bags to the other side of the room. "I agree. You take the washroom, I shall dress behind the partition." 

"Okay."

"Alright."

As they went to their respective parts of the suite and began their nightly routines, Kit wondered how married couples would proceed in such circumstances. Did women truly just change their dresses in front of their husbands? And did she too watch as he unbuttoned his breeches, and then...

Splashing cold water onto her face, Kit wiped it off with the cloth provided by the hotel and stepped back to take in her appearance. Now just in her shift, she looked far more unremarkable - younger, even. With her hair hanging loose around her shoulders, it reached nearly the entirety of her back, as she had not had the chance to cut it while at camp. Strangely enough, this was how he first saw her, when she had been reckless enough to leave the house wearing only her father's coat over the top of it. 

Why, then, did she feel so very nervous about him seeing her like this again?

Throwing caution to the wind, she stepped outside the washroom. Kit had already kissed this man today - this would be nothing. 

But as she made for the bed, she came face to face with a similarly undressed Hux. 

The tailcoat and waistcoat had been removed entirely, leaving him in only his white undershirt and sleep pants. Kit did not know if it was the trend of the time, or if the shirt were too big, but the 'v' shaped collar dipped down scandalously low to expose his chest, with a light smattering of hair adorning it. That, coupled with his tousled hair from removing his outer layers, rendered him simply delectable to Kit. 

She must have been ogling him for a substantial amount of time, but he did not seem to notice, for he was too busy doing the same to her. 

There they stood, both hopelessly attracted to one another, and wanting so badly to act on those desires. 

She could afford herself one night, surely. Just to forget about the war and First Order and Ren. She could just be a girl, and he could just be a man. Kit and Armitage - not a Resistance informer and a General. 

And no-one, besides the pair of them, would ever know. 

He seemed to come to the same conclusion. 

Stepping closer to her, he grasped her face in the same gentle manner he had before. Lifting her chin so they were eye to eye, she simply blinked up at him for a few moments. 

While she expected to see nothing but desire, she saw something else. It was how she looked at him; it was something deeper than simply lust. 

Which is why she could not go through with it. 

If Hux had only desired her for her body, maybe then she could have guiltlessly allowed herself to be taken by him, and still gone through with assisting the Resistance, despite her own feelings.

If they were to do this now, it would be essentially a declaration of love - and she could not bring herself to tear it away from him so soon after. 

Coming up to rest her hand atop his own, she slowly removed it from her face. 

"We can't," she said softly. 

His face creased in gentle sorrow, yet there was no push back. 

"I know," he whispered. 

She mirrored that sorrowful crease of brow, letting go of his hand completely. 

He stepped away, back to a respectful distance before looking at her for the last time that night. "Goodnight, Katherine."

And he turned and made his way to the lounge. 

"Goodnight Armitage," she whispered into the room, before blowing out the candle and burrowing beneath the covers of her bed. 

Notes:

This was sooo fun to write I think I fit in like every trope ever haha! Let me know what you think! And sorry for no smut... yet.

Chapter 23: Arkanis

Notes:

Heyyy I know it's been a month but I'm back! Had some health issues but we are back and rock n rolling with this next chapter. Plz enjoy!

Sleep came easily to her that night. Though she was physically exhausted from their day of travel, it was her whirlwind of emotions that truly took it out of her. Had she been completely aware of her senses, she may have lay awake and spiralled through her thoughts, concluding her evening in a bout of tears - rare as they were for her. 

But after everything she had endured, Kit could not fight the call of sleep. They would resolve everything in the days ahead. 

At least, she hoped. 

As she dreamt, her unconscious mind allowed her to live a fraction of what might have transpired that night, had she not been a traitor to the First Order. 

Instead of bidding each other goodnight, Hux would loosen her gown, and slowly push it over her shoulders. She knew little of his sexual prowess - or lack thereof - so she did not know how exactly he would react to bedding her for the first time. But her imagination took control easily enough. 

Once she was bare, he would kiss her - hard - then so caught up in his lust and desire, he would immediately carry her to the bed, hoisting her onto the blankets. She hadn't exactly gone further than this physically, so from here she was unfamiliar with the whole process of lovemaking. 

From what Ren had once whispered in her ear, it involved bending her over and fucking her from behind. All the times he had spoken of intimacy, it had been described as rough, hungry and purely driven by lust. So her unconscious mind imagined Hux in that way; himself now bare and caressing the swell of her arse as he lined himself up. She would moan into the blankets and he would set a harsh pace, as she had been told men were fond of. 

The image grew more aggressive, however, as the Hux in her dream slapped her backside while thrusting harder than before. He was muttering something through clenched teeth, while sweat had begun to bead across his forehead. It sounded as though he were moaning her name. 

She could only whimper in reply. 

"Kit," he said, breathless and ragged. 

She groaned into the blankets below her. 

"Kit," he said again, this time softer and sounding very close to her ear. 

She lifted her head slightly as he continued to plough into her from behind, and for a second could actually feel his hand on her shoulder. 

"Kit," he said one final time, which had her climaxing in her dream, only to wake up to a very real and slightly confused Armitage looking over her. 

"Armitage!" she gasped as they locked eyes. Still cocooned beneath the blankets, she pulled them tighter to herself as she noticed Hux leaning over her with his hand on her arm. Evidently, he had been trying to wake her, but her mind had twisted his actions into something far more devious. 

"Is... is everything alright?" he questioned, noticing her retreat from his touch. 

Blinking the sleep from her eyes (as well as the image of him naked, covered in sweat and filling her from behind), she took a moment to comprehend his words. 

"Uh, yes! Just a very... vivid dream," she said, looking down nervously. 

From his position still hovering over her, the morning sun created a halo-like effect around him. It rendered his hair the true colour of fire, and she could not help but gawk at him for a moment. 

The sound of him clearing his throat cut through her moment of self indulgence. 

"I... see." He looked away, awkward in his movements. It was as though they were back to the start; nervous and unsure around one another. "I am sorry to have to wake you, but it is getting quite late."

She sat up slightly, now fully conscious. 

"How late?" she questioned cautiously. 

With a sigh, he sat up from the bed and stood with his arms crossed. From her place on the bed, Kit could see that he had already dressed and combed his hair. How long had she been asleep? 

"It is nearly eleven o'clock," he said with no judgement. 

Her eyes nearly bulged from their sockets. 

"You allowed me to sleep until eleven o'clock?!" she gasped. 

Shaking his head, he rebutted, "You were exhausted. I woke several hours ago, and I would have woken you too - but you should have seen yourself. You needed the rest, Kit."

She thought about it for a moment. While they were sure to have lost some daylight hours on their venture home, it was an undeniable fact that she had been in dire need of a proper rest. She could not argue with him there. But still, she found a way. 

"You were watching me sleep?" she asked, not daring to meet his eyes.  

It was his turn to look alarmed. "What - no!" he tried to deny. "I might have looked at you once - but it was only to check if you were still sleeping!" he argued, now slightly flustered. 

She smirked slightly, watching as he turned himself away from her direction. 

Before yesterday, he may have laughed off her comment, but after their revelation last night, it was as if the air had shifted. They were left in silence, with Kit remembering all that had transpired. 

Where did they go from here? They had crossed the line of friendship, but they had not entered into the realm of lovers. The two of them dangled in an odd sort of purgatory, unsure about where they stood. 

Did Hux know that despite her deep affection for him, she could never truly be with him? 

Kit knew that he would not be the type to want for a mistress, and she had enough respect for herself that she would not entertain the idea. But how would she tell him this?

He had so clearly seen the same desire reflected in her own eyes, so it was no use denying that she did not want him. Maybe she could argue that she thought herself unworthy, after her relations with Kylo? 

But even when Hux had walked in on them at the most intimate moment of her and Ren's entire relationship, he had not judged her for it. 

Why did he have to make it so hard? 

"I... I'd ought to get ready," Kit said, and Hux took this as his moment to vacate the room in favour of the balcony. 

She watched him go, then went about dressing herself in the day clothes that still felt foreign on her body

---

"I see that the suite was most... productive for our newlyweds, eh?" The moustached gentleman from last night commented as Kit and Hux descended the stairs to return the room key. 

Thinking about how close they got, Kit flushed a deep shade of red, while Hux had to take a moment to clear his throat. 

Without knowing what had actually transpired, one would be inclined believe the gentleman's suggestion based on the pair's reactions. 

"It was a pleasant stay," was all that Hux could come up with. 

The man grinned as he took the key from Hux's hand, writing something into the ledger before him. 

"Well, many safe travels and all the best for the marriage," he concluded with. 

Kit just smiled sweetly at the old man, before taking Hux's arm and turning him in the direction of the stables. Though they appeared thin, his arms felt quite muscled to the touch - evidently a result of all his years in the military. When he moved, she could feel the tendons shifting across his lithe limb, and found herself clinging just a little tighter to him. 

If she could not have all of him, she would savour every part of him she could get. 

As they reached Hux's horse, Liza, as Kit knew it to be called, Hux took her satchel of belongings and attached it to the saddle. 

"What would Dopheld say," she spoke through a smile, shaking her head at the ridiculousness of their encounter with the old man. 

Hux scoffed playfully. "He would be dying of asphyxiation by now - purely from laughter," he said, securing the last of their items. "Shall we?" He motioned to Liza. 

"Let's. We're going to need to make up some time," Kit said as she hoisted herself onto the horse with Hux's assistance. As an afterthought, she added, "It's probably best I drive." 

He grinned shyly as he hopped up into the saddle behind her. 

It would take some time, but maybe things could return to how they once were. 

---

The First Order Army had made the journey from Arkanis to D'Qarshire across several months - taking nearly a year due to how long they spent either at camp or in battle. But riding at full pelt for days on end, the journey took little over a week. 

Riding across the green mosses and shrubbery of the surrounding moorland of Canady's estate, Kit was filled with an odd sense of dread at what was to come. Hux must have noticed something, for he kept silently looking back at her to gauge her reaction. 

After their incident at the inn, they had kept a cautious distance from one another - both physically and emotionally. That is not to say that they were cold in their interactions, but that close affection brimming with something more had been well and truly quelled. Hux was back to stumbling over words while Kit could not look him in the eyes for too long. Consequently, they had never directly discussed it - despite having hours upon hours of free time during their long rides. Most of their journey was spent in silence, and when they arrived at their lodgings each night, Hux automatically took up residence on a lounge or chair. There was a constant air of awkwardness whenever it was time to retire, yet Hux kept his gaze away from Kit's nightclothes - as did she for him.  

She had supposed that once they reached Canady Hall this arrangement would end, as Hux would certainly not be permitted to sleep in the same room as her. 

Looking upon the Hall with its the red brick façade looming in the distance, the thought of going back brought bile up her throat. She had not planned to return so soon, or under such abominable circumstances. Maybe Hux had been correct in questioning what her presence would even do to better the situation - why was she even here? 

Her logical mind said to support her family in their time of crisis, and to use her First Order contacts to assist in the solving of this matter. But her heart told her that she was responsible for this mess, and had a moral duty to see it though. 

What would they all think of her? She was a different girl to the one who left home all those months ago. This girl had purpose - she was a part of something bigger than just herself, and for once in her life she felt as though what she was doing was important. Not that her previous tutoring of Vivienne was inconsequential - but when the girl would elect to skip her arithmetic class in favour of eating lemon cakes, Kit felt as though her efforts were futile. 

She also looked quite different now. Her soft curves had made way for some muscle, given the physical demands of travelling within the army, while her skin had become more freckled from her days spent in the sun. Her hair was longer and she had now become accustomed to wearing it tied back in a bun, where she would often wear it in a loose braid before. In addition, her fingernails were no longer neatly manicured - now with permanent dirt and grime beneath them. 

If Jayne were to see her, she would describe Kit as grubby. Always one for appearances, the youngest sister would be in for quite the shock if she were to encounter Kit while in the field - saw in one hand and bloody bandage in the other.  The image made Kit chuckle. 

"Kit?" Hux asked from his place in front of her. 

Being drawn back to the present, Kit hummed over his shoulder in acknowledgement of his question. 

"I... I want you to know that no matter what your family may say, none of this is your doing. I do not know how much they are aware of, but please know that there is nothing you could have done to prevent the actions of Ren - or your sister."

Though he had said something similar the day they left for Arkanis, the words still held their impact. She had herself already recognised that Ren was to blame for all of this, and that Jayne was likely not entirely innocent either. But having that reminder from someone as precious to her as Hux meant the world. 

She let out a sigh that seemed to carry a lot of her internal worries with it. "It means a lot to hear you say that, Armitage," she said in a rare moment of vulnerability, absent from their relationship since the night at the inn. 

At that, they had reached Canady's front door. From here, they were to enter into an entirely new act; pretend that they were nothing more than colleagues. She knew that Hux would be required to assume the persona of General - all cold glances and sneering comments, just like she had known him to be the night of the ball. It would be deemed unnecessary, however Canady's presence warranted such an act if Hux were required to pull rank or use his military influence. 

Disembarking from the horse, Hux tied her to a nearby post with hopes that a stableboy would be around somewhere to put her away for the evening. 

The pair had elected to arrive in their military garb, given that the matter was a concern of the First Order. Kit also wished for her family to see who she had become - now free of their influence. And it made Hux look all the more imposing, which could only assist in any dealings with her brother in law. 

"Ready?" he asked her quietly. 

"As I'll ever be," she said lowly, moving to grasp one of the large brass knockers. 

---

"Oh it is just deplorable! To think of my little sister, running off with a man - unwed! And the Commander of the army no less!" wailed Dany. 

A pile of used handkerchiefs surrounded Kit's sister like a white, mucus-filled cloud of despair. Judging from Dany's poor state of dress and her sleeping bonnet still atop her head, she did not seem to be taking the news so well. 

Dany had always been quite emotional, and while Kit had had Hux for the past year to level out her own outbursts of emotion, her sister had a lazing old oaf of a husband in Canady who could afford her no such attention. Consequently, she was left to be swept up by such feelings entirely on her own and without any support - which was likely why she continued her hysterics a full fortnight after she had heard the news. 

When Kit had walked into the drawing room, she had been afforded only an acknowledging nod from Canady, and a short hug from her sister before she had resumed her wailing and mentioned that Vivienne had been sent to a relative of Canady's until the scandal was resolved. Within her letter she had claimed that they were all well; this was clearly not the case. 

Hux received no such welcome, except an almost confused look from Canady's glossed over and highly blood-shot eyes. Though judging from the near-empty decanter beside him, it was not a result of excessive crying. 

"Sister, have you heard anything else from Jayne?" Kit attempted to ask, sitting outside the radius of handkerchiefs. Small talk would be futile - and there was not a moment to spare. 

With a sniffle, Dany seemed to realise that she was being spoken to. "Oh," she said despondently - almost offput that we were not asking about her own condition. "Moden did receive a letter yesterday. But it would not be of much use..."

"May I see it?" Hux requested in a clipped tone that suggested this was not entirely a request, but an order. With his hands held behind his back like that, and standing straight upright, he looked the part of a General. 

"Here," came Canady's first words to them since their arrival. Holding out a crumpled piece of paper in one hand, Canady remained seated in his chair as he took a swig from the whisky glass in the other. 

Hux initially made no move to cross the room, but when he realised that the lord would not be moving anytime soon, he grit his teeth and strode over there in fast steps that seemed to emphasise the urgency of the situation. 

Practically tearing the note from the intoxicated man's hand, Hux began to read quickly. Though almost instantly Kit could gauge that there was something of importance in the letter - given the way Hux's eyes widened and then morphed into a scowl. 

"You received this yesterday, yet have taken no actions?" Hux asked in barely contained anger as he held up the note for Canady to see. 

With his head lolling to one side, Canady spoke in slightly slurred words, "I do not bargain with little boys."

That made Hux see red. 

Crossing the room back to stand before Canady once more, the General searched for any sense within the man's eyes. "Kylo Ren is not some little boy to be trifled with - he is the Commander of the First Order and the next heir to the throne!" he yelled, now enraged. Leaning down to Canady's level, he placed a hand on either side of the lord's arm chair - boxing him in and forcing him to look into Hux's eyes. "Put the glass down for once in your life and listen to me, Moden." The older man did as he was told, subconsciously trying to inch away from the General. "Ren has said that he will marry the girl if he is paid that sum of money as her dowry," he grit out while pushing the letter into Canady's face to ensure he had seen it once more. "Now, do you possess such a sum?"

"I..." Canady attempted to rebut. 

"It is a yes or no, Moden. Do. You. Have. The. Sum?" Hux said, emphasising each word of the question.

"Yes."

"Then what is stopping you from paying him and saving this girl's honour?" Hux said with a sneer, making it no secret how much he despised Canady in that moment. 

The older man gave a clumsy shrug. "It would be more than half my fortune. I could not continue my current lifestyle if I were to give it away for the sake of one silly little girl, now could I?" 

Feeling as though he had made a valid argument, Canady returned to his drink as Hux released his hold on the armchair. 

Finally, Hux looked back at Kit. 

With Dany still sobbing away on her right, Kit was positively burning with anger and could almost feel her eye twitching at the absurdity of her family's actions. 

How could they be so useless? Did none of them feel a sense of duty towards their sister? 

Kit did not know if it were the years of built up resentment towards Canady, or simply the way he looked at Hux like he did not care for a word that was being spoken, but suddenly she felt a pressing need to make her voice heard.  

"You pathetic excuse of a man - how could you be so selfish in a time such as this? You would put your lifestyle of luxury over the wellbeing of a family member? Your own sister in law?"

"Kit! Stop that at-" began Dany from beside her, all of a sudden cured from her performative display of sadness. 

"I was not finished," hissed Kit, without bothering to look in her sister's direction. It shut her up quickly. Zeroing back in on Canady, she came to stand beside Hux. "We know of the Commander's character; he may play the part of a gentleman, yet he is anything but. Jayne is likely in real danger by being with him, and you will just allow her to be hurt when you have every facility to put a stop to it?"

Canady rolled his eyes in a very childlike manner. 

Hux made to step in, but Kit touched his arm lightly to remind him that she would fight her own battle this time. 

"We did not ride day and night from D'Qarshire to be met with silence."

At that Canady perked up - or at least, as much as he could in his drunken state. "Hm, I noticed that. You did ride together, and without a chaperone. Tell me, does my wife have not one, but two harlots for sisters?" 

Kit was in disbelief. 

Not only had he insulted Jayne, but she and Hux also. Kit would have slapped him if given the chance. 

Looking to Dany for some kind of sisterly support, she expected to see a similar shock across her features, yet her sister maintained an arrogant look of superiority to show support of her husband. 

Canady huffed a low chuckle to himself. "It was probably your influence that got her into this mess in the first place."

This time, she could not stop Hux from stepping in. 

Grasping the collar of Canady's shirt and pulling upwards so that the older man was forced out of his seat, Hux brought him to eye level. "You would insult your own family, and not only that - but a General of the First Order? Such an offense is punishable by flogging," he grit out the last word.

Canady would not meet his gaze. 

Hux scoffed. "And you are a coward as well."

The General dropped the man, leaving him to fall back into the seat and spill what remained of his whisky on himself. 

"You are not worthy to call yourself a lord. And you are certainly not worthy of Miss Vara's time. You have failed your family." Now looking to Dany, "Both of you."

At that, Dany gave a scandalised scoff, but Hux would not wait around to hear it. 

Coming to rest a guiding hand on Kit's arm, he directed her to the door. "We're leaving," he said to her gently. His change in tone proved a stark contrast to the verbal tirade he had just unleashed. 

"But where will I stay?" Kit asked as she was led out of the drawing room and back into the sunlight of the day. Liza remained tied to the same post where Hux had left her. 

Undoing her reins, he held them out so that Kit could mount the saddle. 

Almost unsure as to her reaction, he said in reply, "Colonel House."

Notes:

A little bit of aggressive Hux for ya. Thoughts?

Chapter 24: Willow

Notes:

This chapter somehow hit 5.5k words - enjoy!

It was evening when they reached Colonel House. 

Though the two estates bordered on one another, they had arrived at Canady Hall late into the afternoon and were greeted by darkness during the ride back across the moorland. 

The air was heavy with tension as they trod along - with both of them still silently fuming over Canady's complete and utter carelessness towards the entire situation. Kit had always known him to be a small-minded and somewhat selfish individual, but his behaviour had surpassed all expectations. 

With just her thoughts for company, Kit realised that she had not even had a proper sisterly conversation with Dany. Canady's accusations towards her hurt, but Dany's lack of support had felt like a knife in her back. 

How many years had Kit looked out for her? Taught her things she would be otherwise clueless about, and ensured that she would not have to endure half of the hardships that Kit had already dealt with, being the oldest? 

She also realised that anything she had intended to tell Dany regarding their mother's true loyalty would have to remain unsaid, as there was clearly no changing Dany's obedience to her lord husband. 

At present, her life was in shambles. 

One sister had allowed her husband to call her a harlot, while the other would likely be wed to Kylo Ren come the end of the fortnight. And Hux - possibly the only man she had ever truly felt a deep tenderness for - likely believed that she did not want him. 

But presently, there was nothing within her power that she could do to improve any of the circumstances before her. So she made an odd sort of mental peace with her current predicaments, numerous as they were. It all came back to what Hux had said; what, realistically, could she do? 

Already he was a part of her mind. It would be difficult to shake from her subconscious, but part of her did not want to see him gone. 

As they strode down the small hill that signalled the beginning of Mitaka's estate, they suddenly came upon familiar surrounds. 

The lake was as still as always, yet in the warmer weather the willow tree had sprouted many bright green shoots and additional leaves. The ancient bark stood as strong as ever, reaching its boughs over the water's edge. In the twilight, she could just make out a single strand of leaves that caressed the surface of the lake, leaving a constant ring of ripples in its wake. 

It had grown since they were last here. 

Seeming to sense her thoughts, Hux pulled slightly on the reins, bringing Liza to a slower pace as they passed beside the ageing willow. 

Kit had expected him to make comment about their whereabouts - possibly even some teasing remark about how he should have left her in the water, given all the trouble she had caused him. But he simply spared a sombre glance for the willow, then continued on towards the house above. 

Canady really must have got to him. 

Cantering up to the large building, they passed under the oil lamps which lit their way to the stable. There must have been some staff present to light the path, though there was no-one to stable the horse - so Hux set about it himself. 

Silently, he slid from the saddle before assisting Kit down to the ground. He removed her bag from Liza's back, before ushering the horse into a stall where she could rest. 

Kit was entirely too caught up in replaying her earlier interactions to realise that she had now been led to the doors of her childhood home. Though it now belonged to Mitaka, he must have advised that Hux would be making use for it during his time in the county. 

They stood shoulder to shoulder, looking up at the grand façade - with Kit noticing that there was light spilling from underneath the doors. 

The last time Kit had been in this place, it was the day she had come to live with Canady. She could only just recall how the dust blankets had been thrown over the furniture, and how the portrait of their family had been taken from off the walls and likely thrown in an attic somewhere. Mitaka had only occupied Colonel House for the few months he had come to stay in Arkanis last year, around the time of their first meeting. So Kit did not know what she expected to find inside. 

Kit looked over to Hux to see him equally lost in thought. She was half expecting him to simply walk through the doors and be done with it. But there was a crease in his brow that she couldn't quite place.

"Everything alright?" she asked. The first words since they had left Canady Hall. 

Hux blinked several times before looking in her direction. He let out an uncharacteristically defeated sigh, while his eyes trailed all over her face. He had been so full of anger when they left, and Kit wondered where it had all gone. "Your own family... have they always treated you so?"

Kit's brows shot up. His concern - it was over her? 

"Not always. When we were younger, each of us got along fairly well. But when Dany got married and Jayne entered society... it was as if I became an afterthought. There was little chance at me ever becoming a wife, so they got on with their lives and courtships. I just... remained stagnant, I suppose." 

He smiled sadly at her. "I wouldn't call joining the army 'remaining stagnant'."

She huffed a small laugh and his smile widened in return. 

Stepping up to the entrance, Hux pulled on the large rope to signal their arrival. From within, the sound of a bell could be hear reverberating throughout the house. That hadn't changed. It was then followed by a swift set of footsteps until the door was swung open. 

"Good evening General. Forgive me, I was not expecting you until later. I see you have brought a guest?"

The older man - the butler, Kit concluded from his attire - stood with the door ajar, looking down onto the pair inquisitively. 

Kit found an odd sense of irony in being called a guest to the house she had spent most of her life in. She had secretly hoped that their old butler, Wilkes, was still employed. This man before her now was a stranger. 

"Yes. This is Miss Vara - my head nurse," Hux said as he stepped inside the house. Kit trailed behind. "Our arrangements have changed, and Miss Vara will be staying here. Please provide her my lodgings, as I will not be needing them."

This surprised Kit. 

The butler closed the large door behind them, letting the warmth of the building fill the large hall. 

"You're leaving already?" she asked incredulously. They had only just arrived in Arkanis. 

"I will take supper, but then I must depart. I can move faster under the cover of dark, and I do not wish to let Ren wreak his havoc any longer than he already has."

"Then let me go with you," she pleaded.

Hux glanced briefly to the butler before looking back at Kit. "You know that would be unwise," he said in a hushed tone that the older man could not hear.

"But Jayne-"

"Is likely already in enough trouble as is. If Ren were to see you again," he sighed and shook his head, "I cannot imagine it would end well for Jayne, and especially not for you." 

Kit looked down, realising the truth in Hux's words. Though she did feel as if he were being slightly overcautious, his concern for her was something that she could never fault. There were few in her life that would extend such concern for her wellbeing, and it was something that had been absent for much of her life. 

She nodded in understanding, taking her bag from Hux's hand. 

"I will show you to your quarters. Cook will have dinner ready shortly."

The butler began up the stairs, taking a candlestick from nearby to light their way. Following behind, Kit spared a glance to Hux before continuing on her way. 

---

Mitaka's room - the one that had been prepared for Hux's stay, and that Kit had now been assigned - had once belonged to her parents. 

The bed was the same; an ornately carved wooden headboard that faced the window, with four posters that nearly reached the roof. In her younger years, Kit had delighted in being able to climb such posters to the very top, before jumping down onto the mattress below. Her mother had always scolded her for such an act, but her father had laughed deeply when he saw Kit's toothy smile and mussed hair. 

She lay back on the blankets now, looking to the covered canopy above. She had never imagined that she would be back in this room. Though Kit supposed she would be spending quite some time here, until Hux and Mitaka could resolve the issue of Jayne. 

She closed her eyes only for a moment. Her sister was strong willed, that was for certain. But every woman had her breaking point. She only hoped that Jayne had not reached hers. 

Kit had so nearly fallen into his trap. Had been willing to let him take her body, because she believed there was no way out. She would likely be heavy with his child by now, were it not for Hux. 

Kit just hoped that he could save her sister from the same fate. 

Thinking to the General now, he was probably waiting for her. 

Though she was still in disbelief that he would be leaving as soon as he had taken his supper. She'd never been apart from him since joining up. And his constant presence was something she had come to feel was a part of her. 

From their time together, she knew he felt similarly.  

Feeling her stomach growl, Kit sat up and smoothed down her hair. She may as well enjoy these last hours with the General. 

---

"If I ride at full speed, I should reach Coruscant within the week. I'll forgo the inns this time - just make camp by the road," Hux said, spearing a piece of meat with his fork and lifting it to his mouth. 

Her seat at the dining table had been placed at the long end - directly across from Hux, and nearly several metres apart. It was as though the butler was purposely trying to keep them apart. Though she did wonder what he thought of a young woman accompanying the General who was clearly not his wife. Kit gulped, considering that maybe he thought her a prostitute or just some play thing that he kept around to bide the time. But surely from her introduction and nurse's uniform, he could see that she was not merely there for Hux's pleasure? Butlers were never the type to ask, but part of her wanted to clear the air and explain their situation. 

He did not even know that this used to be her home. Though she supposed it mattered little in the grand scheme of things - and Kit had never been one to boast or pull rank. So she would leave it be, and pretend not to know every hall, door and parlour of Colonel House. 

Clearing her throat, Kit looked quickly to the butler standing by the door before looking back to Hux. "Will it be safe?" she tried to ask as calmly as possible, hoping not to give away her own concern for his safety on the road. And the sorrow she would feel at his loss. 

Awkwardly, he tried to not look the butler's way - but the presence of a stranger made conversing how they wished to a very difficult task. It was as though they were being watched; their every move scrutinised. 

"It is a road I am familiar with. And I shall have my pistol if things get... interesting."

She quirked a brow at that. "And once you reach Coruscant? How will you go about finding the-," she hesitated for a moment, not wanting to give away too much sensitive information to prying ears, "the contact," she decided on. 

Hux placed his utensils on the plate, taking his napkin to daub his mouth. "Peavey, bring my horse around will you? I shall depart shortly," Hux all but commanded, and Kit could see a tenseness in his eyes that only appeared when he was in General mode. He had obviously wanted to speak without an audience.

With a terse nod, the butler - Peavey, as he had been called by Hux - left the room, closing the door behind him. At that, Kit picked up her chair and dragged it across the room until she was on Hux's right side, sitting knee to knee. Throwing caution to the wind, along with everything she had mentally told herself about staying away, she placed both of her hands atop his on the table. He just watched. 

Almost childishly, she did not speak, but simply played with his right hand; inspecting each of the knuckles and running her fingers along the creases of his palm. Several small scars littered the tops of his fingers, blooming pink against the otherwise pale skin. He could use some sunlight, she mused to herself. Maybe a visit to the seaside, where he could finally relax and not worry about the ongoing war and rebellion. Time for just the two of them, far away from everything. 

He was leaving now, and everything she wanted to say was lost on her tongue. How would she tell him that he was the other part of her that made her whole, and without him felt a piece of her soul missing? 

Using his unoccupied hand, he came to wipe a tear from her eye. She did not notice it had even begun to fall. 

But of course he had. 

"I will ride back to you as soon as I see to it that your sister is safe and cared for," he whispered, closer to her face now. "Mitaka will have left a card with the post-office. He knows what he's doing," Hux said, now brushing her hair from her face. "As do I," he reassured her. 

Kit sniffled. "I know- I know. But Ren is reckless. What if he's just using her to lure you to him? What if he's already killed Mitaka, and what if he-"

"Katherine," he spoke softly and without any reprimand. He needed her to calm down. "He would not be so brash. If he wanted us dead, I believe he would have done so already. A man as cowardly as him would have poisoned the wine or cut my throat while sleeping."

Though the imagery was bloody and visceral, it made her giggle all the same - which had been his desired effect. 

She always delighted in her General's sense of humour. 

Now that Hux had her smiling, he stood and pulled her up to him, then in closer. Looking down on her, he seemed to savour the features of her face before closing his arms around her torso and moving her head to rest on his shoulder. Slowly, she could feel him draw in a deep breath and exhale, in which she squeezed him ever so tighter. 

Any awkwardness that remained from their evening at the inn disappeared instantly, and they knew at once what they were to one another. When he made it back, Kit would find a way to tell him - find a way to make it all work. Maybe he would hate her for it - for choosing the side of the Resistance, but she had to at least try. If he were to declare her a traitor to the First Order and call for her execution, at least she could die knowing that she had made her feelings for him known, while also telling him the truth about her allegiance. 

Somehow, she knew they would find a way. 

Basking in the warmth of his body, she closed her eyes and allowed herself to feel safe. With him, she did not need to be completely self reliant in everything she did - he had taught her that it was okay to ask for help. 

And Kit hoped that she had taught him that his kindness and caring for others was not a weakness; that he needn't always wear a mask of animosity. 

They completed each other.

"Come back to me, Armitage," she said into his chest. 

As he stroked her hair, he spoke into it, "I promise."

Quick footfalls signalled they were about to have company once more, and the pair of them broke away - never losing eye contact with the other. 

"Your horse, General," Peavey announced as he motioned for Hux to leave the room. 

Taking his coat in hand, Hux spared one last longing glance towards Kit, before exiting the dining room. She knew it would be foolish to follow, so waited for Peavey to exit behind the General before dragging her chair back to its original position. 

Running to the end of the dining room, she sat herself below the glass of the window - staring out onto the dark of the night, and her General about to mount his horse. 

She longed to make a noise - to do anything to get his attention. But she simply watched with a hand on the window as he glanced back at the grand house before riding off into the night. 

And once more, Katherine Vara was alone. 

---

The first week in Arkanis, Kit had spent her days as if she were an ordinary lady awaiting betrothal; practicing her needlepoint, reading, and sketching. But after seven consecutive days of this, Kit found herself growing restless - as though she were just bounding through her life with no purpose once more. 

Peavey's presence still filled her with a sense of unease; appearing in every room and watching her eat at dinner time. She had once politely asked if he would wish to retire early, but he had responded by saying that his orders said otherwise. Whose orders? Certainly not Hux, and she assumed not Mitaka either. Kit was sure to keep her guard up around him. 

By the ninth day, she had found a particularly devious method of ensuring he left her alone. 

She had not played the pianoforte in nearly a year, and so Kit thought it a fine time to brush up on her skills. For hours at a time, she would sit at the grand instrument that had been in that house long before her father had been its owner, and practice every piece within the music book atop the stand. However, due to her being out of practice, it just so happened that many of her notes were wrong - or missing entirely. She could not say if it were on purpose or due to her unpractised hands - but once she heard an angry sigh coming from the other side of the door at her initial mistakes, they miraculously happened to triple in number. 

---

When she grew bored of the songs in the book, Kit turned her talents to composing instead. 

It was something she had always wished to try - though she was quickly learning that it was far more complex than she had imagined. 

Kit could create a simple melody with ease, but writing the accompaniment proved the most difficult part. For she was writing a piece to be played by two, in hopes that one day Hux might play it alongside her. The thought of him made her smile - wondering what he was doing at that very moment. 

Had he encountered Ren yet? And what role had Mitaka played in all of this? Was Jayne a blushing bride - and the future queen?

Shaking her overactive thoughts away, she channelled it into her composition - writing a fast paced, high pitched melody to be played without any accompaniment at first. But as the notes quickened in tempo and rose higher, the other player would begin; pressing out slow, deep notes that contrasted beautifully with that of the other player. 

Eventually, the higher notes grew more moderate in pitch and speed, until both players were playing a variation of the same melody - none leading the other, and perfectly in sync. Sharing the burden of playing equally. 

It was by no means complex in its techniques or structure, but Kit was proud of her creation nonetheless. Though she could only hear one part of the duet at a time, given that she was missing her accompanist. 

She could still recall the time they had performed together at the dinner party, and how their hands had met for the briefest of moments. He had run away shortly after, and Kit chuckled at the thought. Knowing him now, he was likely embarrassed by his own reaction - not angry at her like she had originally thought. 

When he returned and she told him how she felt, maybe then they would find time to share this piece together. 

Kit could only hope. 

---

The food at Colonel House was still decent, at least. 

Though meal times were an odd affair, in which she found herself once more sat at the end of the table closest to the window. Yet now she was without the company of Hux. 

Her slurping of the soup echoed throughout the large dining hall, and she tried her hardest not to smirk at Peavey's visible discomfort at the sound. 

He knew he was very welcome to leave - but his stubbornness must have prevented him from doing so. Kit was starting not to care; she was stubborn too, and could easily play at that game. 

For the next few days, her tea was drunk extra loudly, and she ensured that the cup clattered obnoxiously every time she set it down onto its small saucer. Crumbs were always to be left when she ate a biscuit or a slice of cake for afternoon tea, and she made sure to always leave her chair slightly untucked - just enough so that Peavey would have to make an effort to fix it. 

Each of these actions were met with a tight lipped smile and a nod, which Kit returned with the sweetest smile of her own. 

He was a hard man to break, but by the second week, Kit could have sworn that she saw his eye begin to twitch. 

---

Realising that she should probably invest her time in something more productive than tormenting the butler, Kit set about exploring Colonel House once more. For she had realised that she had not ventured much out of her room and the dining hall. 

Walking the dark corridor to where her childhood room had been, Kit gazed upon the art hanging on the wall.

It was all exactly as her father had left it. Which could only mean one thing. 

Picking up her skirts so she did not trip, Kit raced further down the hall to the very end, to find a grand painting in a golden frame still hung high where she had last seen it all those years ago. 

It was a portrait of her family.

Painted several months after Jayne's birth, the five of them looked so young. 

Her mother and father were dressed in their finery - with her father donning his military dress, and her mother wearing a gown of deep green and jewels to match. Both of them sat on their own chair, while Jayne was cradled in her mother's arms, and Dany sat atop her father's lap. Kit, being the eldest child sat on the floor in front of them with her skirt splayed out to show all its ruffles and bows. 

They looked the picture of a perfect family. 

Though it had become clear to Kit over the years that they were anything but. 

One sister was by now likely married to the future king and her past abuser. Another had stood silently by while her husband called her a harlot. Looking onto the youthful face of her mother, Kit recalled the hostility she had held in her heart towards her mother for abandoning them - though in reality she had been a Resistance officer who died trying to help others. And her father, who she had only ever seen as a good man, had been a key player in the success of the Order's takeover. 

But as Kit looked at that younger version of herself, she was not filled with sadness at the thought of all that would happen to that little girl in the years to come. Her life in recent times had not been an easy one - but those events had shaped her into who she was. 

And Kit liked who she was. 

---

Her old room had been designated as the storage room, so she was met only with pieces of furniture draped with white sheets. It was of little consequence to her, because it would do her no good to think of the past any longer. She needed to be around something of this time - something new. She needed to be surrounded by life, and not the lingering feeling of those long passed. 

So to the garden she wandered. 

Kit kept up this habit for most of her third week - extending her walks each day, and once even spending dawn until dusk walking the extensive grounds of Colonel House. She had of course taken provisions with her on the journey - though most of her time had been spent dozing in a field of wildflowers, like she had enjoyed doing in her youth. 

She was beginning to enjoy her time, finally. 

Out in the fields, no one was watching her or could tell her what she should be doing at any given moment. It was in these fields of wildflowers, some distance from the moorland, that Kit began thinking up what to say to Hux when he returned. In moments where she became so impassioned, she would stand up and act out the scene as if he were before her. 

The romance novels she had read in her first week must have gone to her head, for she found herself fainting and swooning at the end of each confession, before she collapsed into a fit of giggles at her own ridiculous behaviour. 

If only Peavey could see her now.

At times, she felt pathetic for feeling this way. She did not need a man to tell her how to spend her days, or to base her happiness off of. 

But she missed him deeply. In a way that she had never felt towards another. 

She knew the name of this feeling, but was hesitant to call it what it was. She had thrown that word around so liberally during her time with Ren, so now she would go about it this time with the utmost caution. 

---

It was nearing the end of the third week when she finally made her return to the willow. Underneath its boughs, time seemed to slow. When her mother had been alive, this had been a favourite spot of hers too. She could clearly remember the times she had raced her sisters and mother from the house down to the edge of the lake, simply to stand underneath the willow and be encased by its wall of leaves. Something about such a large tree made her feel so small and insignificant - dwarfing all her worries and reminding her that there were far grander things in life than her small concerns. 

It still had that effect, even now. 

After weeks of his slinking around, she did not care what Peavey thought of her. She had forgone styling her hair - choosing to leave the natural curls as they were and to not entrap them in a bonnet. Her dress had been a favourite before joining the army, though she elected to leave behind the overcoat on account of the warmer weather. So once more, she sat underneath the willow and watched as the march flies bounced atop the water of the lake. 

Reminiscing about her eventful last visit to this place, Kit could not help but smile to herself. Hux had been himself that night, and it had taken another few months to break down the barrier to reveal his true self once more. And she was so glad that she had.

Kit had just begun to drift off when the sound of hoofbeats grew in the distance. Standing up immediately, she knew they could only belong to one rider. 

As the figure drew closer, Kit could see that it was him - red hair and all. And if he had returned, that meant that Jayne was safe.

He was galloping at such a speed that she thought he might not stop, but as the horse bounded over the last hill before the willow tree, he pulled back on the reins to slow her. Before coming to a complete stop, the General was jumping off his horse and running over to her - propelled forward by the movement of the steed. 

She had little time to react before her General was picking her up into his arms and spinning her around as if she were weightless. 

Kit could not help the joyous laugh that escaped her upon his actions. 

When she finally met with the ground again, she pulled him into a proper hug - much like the one they had shared before his departure, but filled with happiness instead of sorrow. 

"You came back," Kit said in a delighted whisper. 

"I made a promise," he returned, stepping back to look at her face. He adored how she looked in that moment; the days in the sun had darkened her freckles, and her hair was wild in a way that brought out the youthfulness of her features. To him, she was perfect. 

She must have noticed him staring, because she began to chuckle. "What is it, Armitage?"

He let out a small huff that wasn't quite a laugh before taking her hands in his. "Forgive me Kit, but I have waited near a month to speak with you - to even look at you," he smiled at the ground while busying himself with intertwining their hands. Now he looked at her - really looked at her, as if he were staring down into her soul. "In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you. Every second I am apart from you, I long to be near you. I believe I have felt that way since you bandaged my hand... at this very spot." He took a second now to look away from her, afraid that he might scare her off with this vulnerability that he had never allowed another to see. Taking a deep breath, he began again. "I recognise that I may have appeared cold and rude at first, but you were able to see through me - to see the real me. You are unlike any other I have ever known. And I know you said we should not, that night at the inn. But if your feelings on the matter have changed, you must know that I love you, Katherine."

She was speechless. 

The pages of rehearsed words that she wished to say to him meant nothing now, because he had said it all so plainly and simply. 

He loved her. 

And she loved him. 

Instead of responding with her own words, Kit leapt towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck and crashing their lips together in a desperately loving kiss. 

By the time Armitage realised what was happening, he was stumbling backwards in the direction of the lake's edge. 

Refusing to relinquish his grip on Kit's waist or to break their kiss, the pair of them stumbled back a few steps, before they were falling over and collapsing into the still water below. 

Unlike the first time Kit had taken an unplanned dip in the lake, this water was warm and inviting. And as the two came up for air, they laughed together, before brushing back each other's hair and resuming their kiss - clothes sopping, and drips of water running down their faces. 

Only when they needed to breathe did they break away; lips red and swollen, and panting as if they had just run a mile. 

Kit somehow came to wrap her legs around Armitage, and he held onto the back of her thighs. This allowed her to hold his head in both her hands. He smiled widely up at her, the likes of which she had never seen. And as she wiped a small bead of water from his brow, she realised that her soul was once again complete. 

"I love you, Armitage."

 

Notes:

So now these idiots have finally kissed, but it's not over yet! Hopefully this didn't feel too rushed - I tried to create a sense of time passing, but I just really wanted to get to that confession!!!

Let me know what you thought :)

Chapter 25: Fireplace

"It was my mother's, you know."

"What was?"

Hux grinned from his place behind Kit and continued to fidget with her hand in his. "The ring."

After their dip in the lake, the pair had raced hand in hand to Colonel House in need of some warmth. They had been quick to assume a position on the floor in front of the fire, with Kit sitting between Hux's legs so he could maintain his hold around her. Still in their sopping wet clothes, it was like they could not be parted from one another even for a moment. 

Holding up her left hand, Kit took in the sight of her ring finger, adorned with the silver filigreed band. She had been wearing it so long, she'd nearly forgot that it was still there. Though she realised its presence would be missed, were she to relinquish it. 

"Thank you for entrusting me with it. It really is a lovely piece," she said, making known her earliest sentiments about the ring. Then she added, "Did your father give it to her?"

He scoffed with laughter and Kit could feel the jolt from behind. "I would have it melted down for scrap if it had come from him. My mother received it upon the completion of her music studies." 

Kit could recall the evening she had danced with Hux and he had told her about his mother. If she remembered correctly, his mother had been the one to teach him how to play. She briefly thought to the duet she had composed for him, and wondered what his mother would have thought of it. 

"She was a performer?"

"A good one. She played all across the country - which was unheard of for a woman at the time." Then Kit felt his tone change. "That is where she met my father, actually. When she was touring - after one of her shows. It was a brief encounter, to be sure. But enough to leave her with child." 

Kit had not known this extent of his family history. Looking at Hux, one would never expect such a fraught past to follow. 

"Did he offer to marry her?" Kit asked. It would be rude in normal conversation, but seeing as she was presently sitting in this man's lap, she considered them past the need of politeness. 

"No. He ignored every letter she sent, and even when I was born did not come to her. I was seven the first time I met him. My pre-academy aptitude tests were notably high, and that brought him out," he mused. "He must have seen that his child was not a total failure, and only then deemed me worthy of his last name."

"I can't imagine what that must have been like," Kit tried to empathise, rubbing the arm he had wrapped around her in a soothing manner. 

"If anything, it motivated me to succeed - purely to spite him."

"Which is a completely healthy coping mechanism for a child," Kit said sarcastically. 

"All I know is that I shall not be perpetuating that cycle. Any child I had would be cared for, regardless of anything as meaningless as test scores." He seemed to stop himself there and think for a moment, as if remembering who he was talking to. "Though I find that I would also be perfectly content with not being a father."

That made her smile. Hux had known of what Ren had tried to do to her, so to hear him recognise how it may affect her feelings towards children made her feel seen. Though her heart had now softened to the idea of a family, she did not wish to express that so directly when she was still keeping the secret of her loyalty to the Resistance from Hux. 

Feeling that words were not right for that moment, Kit simply turned in his arms and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips, before resettling herself into the warmth of his hold. She blushed secretly to herself, still feeling giddy at the thought of being able to do that. 

Hux chuckled to himself, then pulled her back up against him so he could speak in her ear. "I don't think I'll ever get used to that," he said said, placing a small kiss on her neck in return.

She gasped lightly, as the action brought goosebumps to her skin. His shirt was still slightly damp, allowing the cold fabric to create a contrast to her blazing skin. 

"What if Peavey sees us?" she whispered.

"He won't. I've locked that door and told him to take the rest of the week off."

She scoffed. "Week? I told him multiple times to take the day off. He always just denied the offer and told me he didn't take orders from me."

"I fear that the orders of a General hold more sway than that of a nurse," he said deviously, knowing it would set her off. 

She feigned a shocked gasp at his statement which had him laughing lightly. "Because I am such a professional, I am going to ignore that comment, General. Now, I believe you promised to tell me what transpired in Coruscant."

"Forgive me - I was otherwise... distracted by a certain individual," he said while taking her hand in his once more. He sighed, as if preparing to tell a long story. "When I arrived in Coruscant, I went immediately to the post office, and as I had expected, Mitaka left a card. It was for an address - an inn, actually. I had presumed to find only your cousin, but upon arrival I was met with he and your sister... having just been wed that morning."

"Wed?!" Kit cried, spinning around to face him. 

Hux nodded. "She was still in her white gown when I called, and the two of them were so nauseatingly... happy," he said with a tone that showed even he was still surprised. "I do not think I saw Mitaka cease his hold of her the entire length of my visit."

"So Jayne and Mitaka... are married?"

"Yes."

"Husband and wife."

"Correct once again."

"And she did not even write?" Kit asked, quite disheartened. 

"I think her circumstances did not permit any time for such endeavours," Hux offered. "Besides, you will see her soon. As Mitaka's wife, she'll join him in his lodgings, back at base."

Kit had to laugh. "So my little sister will be the wife of my superior - and will technically outrank me." 

He joined her in that. "I had not thought about it that way."

As if suddenly remembering she asked, "So, then what happened with Ren?" 

He drew in a breath. "Ah. Well, once I had congratulated them on their nuptials, I asked the same thing. They went quite silent, and it was your sister who spoke up. She told me that Ren had come to Arkanis, and attended a ball held in town. She had not had the intention of even speaking with him, yet he approached her. She was confused initially - but then he mentioned that she must be happy for her sister."

"For me?"

"Yes. When Jayne enquired after why she should be happy for you, Ren stated that it is because you and Mitaka were all but engaged to be married."

Kit was silent for a moment. "Oh that bastard," she grit out through clenched teeth. "He must have read one of Jayne's letters in my room - that's how he would have known about her fondness for the Colonel."

Hux nodded. "Jayne was obviously upset by this news, as she had no reason to believe it untrue. That is partly why she had not written to you in so long - she was furious that you would seek out the Colonel for yourself when she had expressed affection for him."

"That is a very Jayne thing to do."

"And so when Ren offered to dance with her to lift her spirits, a connection was immediately formed. Ren feigned apologies for having to deliver the news, claiming he did not know of any prior attachment. From Jayne's account, he was the perfect gentleman." Hux rolled his eyes. "He even asked her 'Who are you? What do you most desire from your life?' - practically providing the blueprint for how to best seduce her."

Kit winced and had to hide her head in his chest. "He said those exact words to me too, the first night we met. How was I so gullible?" 

"It was a convincing act - I'll give him that," Hux conceded, running a hand along her back. "So over the following weeks, he would seek your sister out, simply to talk with her. Then one evening, at the performance of the orchestra, he confessed that he had fallen in love with her - and proposed on the spot. Thankfully there were none to see, as she accepted him instantly." Hux picked up a curl of Kit's hair, running it between his fingers as he continued to tell his recount of  events. "She tells me that she did not feel any actual affection for him, but was prompted by her heartache at losing Mitaka and suspected betrayal from you as a sister; she planned to marry him out of spite."

Kit had to laugh at that. "Only she would be stubborn enough to go through with a marriage out of spite."

"And she nearly did. They eloped to Coruscant, and stayed at only the finest hotels and dined at the most expensive restaurants. All placed on the same tab under her name - for you see, they didn't want to cause commotion among the town by putting it under Ren's name and their elopement being found out before they were properly wed. But Ren had promised that once they were man and wife, it would be easily paid off."

"Oh Jayne..." Kit sighed, not at all shocked by her sister's lack of financial knowledge. 

"That is when Ren must have written to Canady to ask for the dowry. However, upon Canady's lack of response, he just up and left. Abandoning her with the thousands of dollars of accumulated debt, and with no way to pay for it. Thankfully, only a few days passed before Mitaka arrived." Hux smirked to himself then. "She threw a shoe at him upon seeing his face, but once he explained the situation and denied any engagement to you, I believe he proposed right there on the spot."

"Of course he did," Kit grinned.

"They went to the chapel the very next day and were wed. That is when I arrived. I tried to locate Ren, but I believe he had returned to the palace and Snoke." He shook his head slightly in defeat. "But anyhow, the debt was paid off, and the happy couple were even provided a little extra for their honeymoon."

"How did you convince Canady to send the money?"

"It is of no concern."

"No - how did you do it? Did you threaten him again?"

"I would never do such a thing," he lied sheepishly. "All that matters is that it got paid off."

"Who paid for it?" she asked directly, sitting back so she could look at him. 

He lowered his eyes, and would not meet her stare. 

His silence was the only indicator she needed. 

Sitting up on her knees, she moved her hands to cradle his face as she kissed him deeply. She felt him gasp into her mouth - clearly not expecting it, but enjoying it nonetheless. 

Kit chuckled at how easily he reacted to her actions. She would enjoy exploring him.

The kiss moved slowly, with no sense of urgency - as if they had all the time in the world to savour the feeling. Their hands trailed up and down each other's bodies, caressing over the clothing still damp from the lake. When Kit moved to grasp the hair at the nape of Hux's neck, he let out a high pitched sound that she had never heard him make. 

So he liked that.

He still had not managed to open his eyes, and Kit could see him silently mumbling something to himself as she took in the sight of him; a light flush across his face and lips red from her relentless attack. 

Settling her legs on either side of his thighs, she lowered herself so she was seated on top of him. Instinctively, he went to steady her by the waist, giving her curves an experimental squeeze. Now he opened his eyes, at the feel of her moving back and forth over him. 

He groaned and craned his head forwards, so that Kit could feel his hot breath on her chest. Seeming to notice where he was, Hux left a light kiss on the swell of each breast.

Kit seized the opportunity and allowed her hand to wander between his legs, where a noticeable bulge had begun to form. She blushed at the thought of it, but continued on. Grazing over the fabric of his pants, she felt him draw in a sharp breath and tighten his hold on her. 

How long had it been since he'd been touched like this? He was a General of the First Order Army, so Kit had no doubt that he could have any woman he wanted or could visit the brothel at any time he chose. Yet that did not account for why he remained unmarried. And as she thought about it, she had never once seen him entertain any ladies during their time working together. 

Kit smiled to herself, and wondered if her presence had anything to do with that. He had admitted that he loved her from the moment she bandaged his hand - so he must have felt this way for a long time. She felt instant remorse for not realising her own feelings sooner. 

The poor man. She would have to put him out of his misery. 

His buckle was easy enough to undo with one hand, and she slid into his pants to make contact with his length. 

"Kit," he hissed at the action. 

"I know, I know. Just let me show you how thankful I am."

He managed a nod. 

Releasing him from his trousers, she tried not to gasp at the sight of him. Kit had never seen this part of a man, yet she could tell that he was sizeable. The tip was flushed with red, and when she went to grasp him by the base, she could feel him throb in her hand. 

It was all happening so fast now. Soon, she would cease to be a virgin, and would let the man she loved claim her for his own. This was something usually reserved for the marriage bed, but Kit cared little for her own propriety now. 

Reaching up into her skirts, she pulled her undergarments to the side and raised herself over him once more. She had lined him up with her entrance and began to sink down, but as the head of his length made contact, he immediately stilled her movements, holding her above him and not permitting her to go any further. 

"Armitage?" she questioned in a whisper, heart beating from the adrenaline of the moment. 

"I... I can't have you like this. Not yet. I won't sully your virtue." 

"But I love you," she pleaded with a kiss to his neck.

"And I you. But we must wait. Once we're wed, I promise I will take you in every way imaginable," he all but moaned. 

She did not know if he realised what he said, but the admission that he wanted to wed her sparked something inside her. 

The last time a man had suggested such a thing, she had been repulsed by him. But coming from Hux, it only encouraged her further. 

While he did not want to take her virtue, that did not mean that she could not pleasure him in other ways. She remembered an overheard conversation between her old maidservant and the cook - about ways that they would reward their husbands after a long day's work. 

Kit moved with the confidence of someone far more experienced, pumping his cock several times before she brought her lips to lick across its head. Hearing the way that he moaned prompted her to take him wholly into her mouth, without time for him to adjust to the sensation. 

He was so long that she could only fit part of him, but continued to suck and pump his length.

At some point he had come to grasp her hair, keeping it out of her face and guiding her up and down his shaft. She began to taste something salty, and moaned around him.

"I'm not- I can't last much longer," he gasped out. 

But she had just begun, hadn't she? How was he so close already?

Kit hummed in acknowledgement and sped up her movements, bobbing up and down on him and allowing him to thrust up into her mouth. 

Only moments later, Hux cried out her name before spilling inside of her. 

Letting his spend settle on her tongue, she swallowed around him. Kit looked up at him now to find the General panting heavily, with pupils blown out and his hair an utter mess. He looked delectable. 

But he was now looking down at her in such a way that he never had before. It was as though he were in complete awe of her - as if she were a goddess of some sort. And with it, she still sensed a hunger that had not yet been fully sated. 

Hux removed his member from Kit's lips, before drawing her up to his level to kiss her properly. 

"Lie back," he whispered in between breaths. 

Doing as she was told, Kit assumed the position in front of the fire. The rug underneath provided cushioning to her back, while her head rested on her arm. 

As Hux crawled on top of her, he began to leave a trail of kisses down her body, starting with her neck. From her breasts, he worked down her sternum until he reached her clothed stomach. Moving lower now, he reached a hand up the side of her leg, to her undergarments. 

Kit gasped as she felt him pull them down and toss them to the side, leaving her exposed to him. 

She could feel the cool air on her lower regions, as Hux lifted her skirts. 

What was he doing? 

Her question was answered almost immediately when she felt his warm tongue lick a stripe up the inside of her warmth. 

The feeling was completely foreign, though terribly pleasurable. And the thought of Hux on his knees, using his mouth to pleasure her only amplified the feeling tenfold. 

"I always knew you'd taste amazing," he spoke into her cunt.

He doubled down now, focusing in on her clit with his tongue, while his fingers made to enter her. 

As he pushed inside, her walls contracted around his finger - prompting him to add another. Wet sounds filled the room, and Kit gasped at the lewdness of it all - especially at how wet she was for him. 

Taking a moment to reposition herself, Kit braced herself on her arms and looked down between her legs to where Hux was positioned, only to be met with his lust-filled gaze staring directly at her. 

He sucked harder on her clit just to see her reaction, and it had her biting her lip and gasping in pleasure. He began to curl his fingers inside her, pumping in and out with an increasing pace. 

Something started to build inside her, unlike anything Kit had ever felt. She had touched herself before, however the feeling of someone else doing these things to her was an entirely new sort of sensation. And for it to be with Hux - the General whom she hated at first but had grown to love - Kit could not keep her composure any longer. 

With three final thrusts into her, Hux had Kit coming undone around his fingers. It came in waves, and Hux continued his movements throughout it all, guiding her to completion. She could do nothing but stare at the ceiling and allow her climax to wash over her, numb to the world and at the mercy of the man she loved. 

She was so caught up in her bliss that she did not hear what Hux had just said. 

"Kit?"

"Mhm," she hummed, seeing that he was now hovering over her.

"I said how did I do?" he grinned sheepishly, mouth still wet from her cum. 

"Exemplary, General," she said through a toothy grin, still not completely conscious. 

He chuckled at her dazed reactions, and came to lie down beside her. She nestled herself into his hold, resting her head on his chest and sighing in contentment. 

"Where did you learn to do that?" she spoke into his embrace.

"A magician does not reveal his secrets."

Kit chuckled, and Hux joined in - the pair of them lazing by the fire, half undressed and in no mood to move from their position. She wished that they could stay like that forever. 

But as Kit gazed into the flames of the fireplace, she could not help a small feeling of guilt that came over her, as she considered what their future had in store. But for now, she was safe, warm and in the arms of her lover. And tonight, that was enough. 

Notes:

The only plan I had for this chapter was 'he eats her out by the fireplace'. Hope I delivered.

Chapter 26: Shackles

Spending the night with a man was something previously foreign to Kit. Though they had not been together wholly yet, the simple act of sleeping beside one another felt otherworldly and sensual in ways that she had not imagined. The sensation of his hands roaming about her body and exploring the planes of her skin had goosebumps forming along her arms and had her burrowing further into the mountain of blankets on their bed. 

With Jayne's situation resolved, they were afforded had several days of their military leave to do with as they wished before they were set to begin their return journey. Most days began with a lengthy sleep-in, which often left her blushing at the feel of his manhood pressing into her behind. The first morning, she had been quite startled and Hux had expressed his apologies, but by the second, she eagerly took it in hand and helped him out of his predicament. This was often followed by a very eager Hux delving his fingers below her nightgown and bringing her to her own completion, all while maintaining direct eye contact throughout. She had come to find that he was an intense lover; admittedly lacking any recent experience but thought of intimacy as more than a physical act. Every time Hux touched her, it was a declaration of love. 

They had not seen one another completely nude, as that was one step in their relationship that she was not yet ready to take. Somehow, letting him taste her cunt was something she was more comfortable with, and she blushed at the thought. The idea of being looked at and physically desired for her body was incomprehensible to Kit, as she had rejected the notion from within her mind many years ago. 

At one point during their bedroom activities, his hands had stilled on her stomach and he had kneaded the area as if exploring it for the first time. Kit had tried to swat his hands away, as the little pocket of fat had always been an area of insecurity of hers. When she had said such a thing to him, he had kissed her neck and admitted that he adored the extra softness of her stomach. In time, she thought, she would reveal her full self to him.

Hux's return had transpired far better than anything Kit could have ever imagined, and though she was exhausted from everything leading up to it, she still felt her mind working a thousand miles a minute. But when she looked to the man resting beside her, Kit saw her whole world wrapped up in blankets and sleeping soundly. 

He looked so gentle in the mornings, and it was hard to imagine that this was a battle-hardened general of the First Order. Someone who had dedicated his life to the destruction of the very cause that she now supported. 

---

"You snore."

Kit blinked away the last bits of sleep from her eyes as she felt Hux mumbling something into her neck.

"Hm?" she asked, still drowsy from the night. 

He chuckled. "I said, you snore."

Working off her initial instinct, and back to times when she and Hux had thrown insults at each other on the daily, she immediately retorted with "And you thrash about in your sleep."

After a moment of silence had passed, they both fell into a fit of laughter at each other's sleeping habits, relishing in their ability to still tease and jab at one another as they always had before they had revealed their romantic feelings. Kit rolled over so that she was now facing him, to be met with a look of pure adoration that she was starting to become familiar with. 

Reaching for her hands beneath the covers, he grasped them in his own and brought them to his lips to place kisses atop her knuckles. 

"God, your hands are like ice," he whispered into the cool skin. In an attempt to warm her, he breathed hot air into the small cavity her hands had created and rubbed them lightly. 

Feeling awfully devilish, Kit removed her hands from his grasp and immediately rucked up his sleep shirt to place them on his chest. Letting out a quick gasp of surprise, he immediately recoiled while Kit fell into another bout of self-induced laughter. 

So pleased with her actions, Kit did not notice him come to tower over her, pinning her arms to the bed before it was too late. She gave a shrill squeal as she struggled against his hold - gentle, but enough to keep her restrained. 

"Nurse Vara, was that insubordination I just witnessed? To your General, no less?"

Unable to catch her breath from the hilarity of the situation, Kit tried to deny these charges, but could only shake her head. 

"Now you are refusing to speak to your direct superior. These are grounds for disciplinary action. Five lashes are usually called for in situations such as these, but I could be persuaded by other... methods," he said with a smirk. Her smile matched his own and she was about to say something seductive in return, but he let out a defeated sigh before she could begin. "Though I fear that we need to be on the road within the hour."

He stayed there for a moment, as if committing the moment to memory.

"I will miss our mornings like this," Kit admitted, giving him a quick kiss while he still hovered over her. 

Hux hummed into the kiss, giving her an almost sad look when he drew back and sat up on the bed. "It won't be for too long. We shall re-join Mitaka and your sister on the road back to camp, where I shall have the unbearable task of pretending that I am not hopelessly in love with you and will have to refrain from admiring you all hours of the day. For a short while, at least - I cannot let Mitaka think he had any hand in our success. But after a reasonable time has passed, I will finally be able to announce you as my betrothed."

She felt a heat to her cheeks instantly. The way he had said it with such delight - as though it was a thought that crossed his mind often.

"Armitage, was that a..." 

"Oh, God no, Kit. I fully intend to ask you to be my wife - have no doubt about that. But you deserve something far grander than this. And besides, even I recognise that it may be too soon - though I would have married you the moment I pulled you from the lake."

She gave a nervous chuckle to that, so unused to being praised in such a way. Though her heart soared at his admission. This is what it felt like to be loved. There was no feeling that she owed him anything, in the way that she felt a sort of guilt when with Ren. 

"Just promise me that you will not do it in a large public setting. It could be pouring with rain for all I care. But please not in a restaurant or at the opera." 

"I would not dream of it," he smiled, leaving a quick kiss on her nose. "We best make a start. Peavey is set to return shortly, and I would rather he not see us emerge from the same bed chamber before we are wed." 

Like a blushing schoolgirl, Kit giggled as Hux led her from the bed and they prepared to depart Colonel House. 

---

Within the hour, their belongings were packed and they were ready to leave Kit's childhood home. Yet as Hux was loading the last bag onto the saddle, he noticed a slip of paper fall to the ground. 

"Composing, were you?" he asked with a grin, unfurling the paper and reading the musical notes she had drawn across the grand stave. Kit had completely forgotten about the duet she had written in his absence. 

"It was very lonesome without your company, I'll have you know. I suppose I was moved to creation." 

"We shall have to play it once we have returned. I shall redeem myself from our last performance," he said while slipping the paper into the breast pocket of his coat. 

The idea delighted Kit; to be able to share her work with someone who shared an equal passion for it. They were alike in so many ways, Kit mentally berated herself for not seeing it sooner. 

"I shall like that very much," she mused, allowing Hux to hoist her onto Liza's back. 

As Hux joined her from behind, one arm went immediately to wrap around her waist while Kit instinctively leaned back against his chest to feel his warmth. Gripping the reins, he rounded the horse to face the house one last time. 

"Is it odd to think that Jayne will be the lady of this house now?"

Kit was stunned into silence for a moment.

"I genuinely had not even considered that. I suppose she is," Kit said quietly, still coming to terms with the idea that her sister was no longer Miss Jayne Vara, but Mrs Jayne Mitaka. All at once, she realised how separate their lives had become. No longer were they three little girls falling asleep by the fireplace together, but three grown women with lives and families to be had. And also military regimes to overthrow. 

"Well I hope her first order of business is ridding this place of that horrid butler," Hux joked. 

"And finding some new curtains," Kit added, joining in Hux's laughter before he led the horse from the house and set off in the direction of D'Qarshire. 

---

After several hours of riding and easy conversation, they stopped by a stream with a small embankment to allow themselves a short rest.

"So they are about three day's ride away?" 

"If we make good time. Though I am awfully inclined to prolong this journey as much as we are able," Hux admitted, taking a bite from an apple he'd brought for the journey. 

Leaning her head on his shoulder, she hummed in agreement. They still had some time for just themselves, and could keep up the act of a married couple until they re-joined Mitaka and Jayne. They may even get to enjoy the diamond suite properly this time. 

"I still do not know what to say to her," Kit thought aloud. "That my own sister would think so poorly of me that she believed I would engage myself to the man she had explicitly expressed feelings for. And to then run off with a man she hardly knew." 

"Anger can make us do... odd things," Hux attempted to reason. He was by no means supporting the actions of her sister, but tried to offer an alternative train of thought that did not place all blame on one person. 

"I suppose Jayne has never been the most rational individual," she admitted. "Though I joined the army without a second thought, so I suppose I am in no place to judge."

He grinned at her self-reflection, glad that she had made some peace with the events that had transpired. 

Before Hux could take another bite of his apple, they were met with the sound of hoof beats drawing nearer. Unlike those that had passed before, this sounded as though there were multiple horses and possibly even a carriage in tow. From their place by the stream, they would be easily spotted. Though they had nothing to hide, they preferred to limit their contact with others while travelling, lest they were recognised. 

The sounds drew nearer. Then they ceased. "They've stopped," he said lowly to Kit, neither of them turning to see who may be interrupting their lunch. 

But as the sound of incoming footsteps were heard, Hux made a move over to the horse where his pistol was stowed. 

"My, you are a long way from D'Qarshire," came a tightly accented voice. He spoke with the cadence of the upper class, and without looking behind her, Kit could tell that it belonged to someone high within the ranks of the First Order. 

"Pryde. I had thought you were based in Coruscant these days," came Hux's clipped reply. 

Pryde. She had heard that name before, passed around camp. He was an equally high ranking General, and one of Snoke's closest supporters. 

"Oh I am," he said with a tone of self-righteousness that set Kit on edge. "I was actually on my way to Arkanis to seek you out. I have been assigned a matter of the utmost importance."

"Which would be?" Hux asked with zero enthusiasm. 

"The capture of a Resistance spy." Hux merely raised a brow, with little care for the man before him, as if asking him to go on. "Who is your female... companion?" Pryde asked, looking over Hux's shoulder to where Kit sat with her back still to him. "She seems awfully shy."

Kit's heart stammered in her chest. What would they think of their travelling together, unchaperoned? It was meant to have been Mitaka who would come to Arkanis - not Hux. 

Hux looked over to Kit and at that moment she knew it was of no use hiding any longer, and joined the pair where they stood.

"This is Head Nurse Vara, the cousin of Colonel Mitaka. We were called away on urgent business, and Mitaka seems to have been separated from us on the road. We are awaiting his return."

Pryde stilled for a moment at the mention of her name. But then he cleared his throat and smiled, though it was almost reptilian in its execution. "Ah, so that is how you come to find yourself without your chaperone. Though we are at war, so things like this can be excused every now and then."

Kit let out a silent breath of relief, but could not shake the odd feeling she got from the General. He was peering at her oddly, as though inspecting her. 

In a sudden movement, Pryde clicked his fingers and summoned one of the twenty officers that had been accompanying his journey. "Fetch the girl," he commanded. 

Kit's eyes widened. What girl? Did they mean her?

Wordlessly, the officer nodded before making his way back to the large metal carriage that Kit had now noticed. Drawn by four horses, it looked impenetrable; a clear testament of First Order engineering. Yet it did not look as though it were made for use by the officers, as she observed the windows were barred, and there was a large padlock on the door closest to her. 

"You see, Hux, quite a lot has transpired since you took this... spontaneous bout of military leave. In your absence, the prisoners held in the dungeons of the D'Qarshire base have all but vanished into thin air."

Hux's brow creased in annoyance. "How did such a thing happen?"

"The only evidence was a broken hairpin left in one of the locks."

Kit tried to keep her face neutral, but the thought that Poe had been successful in releasing all the prisoners brought her great relief.  

"You believe they escaped?"

"Oh, I know they did. And they were assisted by someone."

Hux sighed in annoyance as if Pryde were wasting his time. "Many kitchen staff frequented the dungeons to feed the prisoners, all while under the watch of the guards. Is it not possible that a hairpin was dropped on accident?" 

"Oh but there is more to the story, General. In the days following the escapes, word came from Coruscant that King Snoke had been assassinated."

"I beg your pardon?" Hux said in shock. 

Pryde simply nodded with an artificial look of sorrow. "Our great leader, King Snoke, was struck down in his chambers by some cowardly Resistance scum. It was only by chance that the Commander called on him to deliver news of the war effort, but instead found him sliced through the middle as if he were a cut of meat."

"Ren found him? No-one actually saw the event take place?" Hux attempted to confirm. 

"Indeed," Pryde said, brushing off Hux's questions. "And it was the wish of our late ruler that the Commander should succeed him, with Snoke having no natural heirs."

Hux scoffed in surprise. "And you believe the spy orchestrated the assassination? Got through all the defences of the palace and escaped without notice?"

"I do. Well, I know so. For we have one of her collaborators," Pryde said, now looking to Kit. 

A bolt of fear shot through her entire body. She had not planned the assassination of Snoke - why was he looking at her so?

Glancing to the officer who had now returned with a shackled figure in tow, Kit's stomach dropped as she recognised the face of the prisoner. 

"Lieutenant Kaydel Ko Connix. Formerly imprisoned in D'Qarshire - captured the night of the prisoners' escape when she tried to set fire to the officers' barracks." 

Kaydel was thrust forward and pushed to her knees. She met Kit's eyes for but a moment, until she hung her head in defeat. Her hair, once plentiful and braided atop her head, was now cut in misshapen patches that revealed the skin of her scalp at certain points. Her face, Kit could now see, was covered in dark blue and red bruises that signalled some were fresh while others appeared to be weeks old. The girl had been tortured. 

It took every ounce of Kit's self control to maintain her composure, but Hux seemed to notice that something was amiss. He looked from Kit to Kaydel cautiously, trying to gauge the situation.

Coming to stand behind Kaydel, Pryde knelt down to grasp her chin in his hold. Hoisting her head up so that she was forced to look upon Kit, the girl let out an exhausted groan at his tight grasp. "Now Kaydel, remember what you said about the nurse who snuck into General Dameron's cell? Is this she?" 

Kit could only hold her breath as she stared into Kaydel's eyes. She could feel Hux's stare from beside her, but could not meet his eyes, for fear of what was about to happen. 

Blinking twice, Kaydel's exhausted eyes filled with water. Silently, she mouthed the words 'I'm sorry' to Kit, before she spoke up. "She's the one. She helped Poe," Kaydel said defeatedly. 

The feeling of being found out was like no other. All sound seemed to blur into a high-pitched ringing, while the scenes before her eyes passed by as if they were moments from a novel. 

She still dared not look at Hux. 

"Katherine Vara, you are under arrest for the crime of high treason. You are to be stripped of your military title and sent to the palace dungeons to await your fate. What say you in your defence?" 

Kit could feel the blood pulsing in her ears, while her chest felt as though she had just been winded or fallen from a great height. 

The icy cool sensation of shackles being placed on her wrists drew her out of the initial shock, now aware of her other senses. 

"I did not conspire to assassinate Snoke," she said softly, looking to the ground. It was of no use denying anything at this point, as she would undoubtedly be found guilty of all charges. Seeing as this was likely her last moment to be spent outside a cell besides her inevitable walk to the gallows, Kit decided she had nothing to lose. "But I did aid Dameron in his escape." At this, she finally looked to her beloved - to the man she had once hoped to call her husband, but now would likely be despised by. "I am loyal to the Resistance."

For but a brief moment, they looked to each other. She saw the same fear she felt reflected back at her from within his stare. Mixed amongst it, there was not anger or betrayal to be seen, but sadness. His mouth parted for a moment, as though he were about to say something, before it closed and his jaw tensed. In a matter of seconds, his eyes steeled and his brows creased into a look almost akin to disgust. She had not seen this man for many months - since the night of the first ball where he had hidden his true self. 

How she wished she could scream and declare her love for him and admit that it was real despite her deception. But that would implicate Hux as well, and she could not have him brought into this as well. So she remained silent and hung her head in defeat. 

"Get her out of my sight," sneered Hux, as the officer pushed Kit toward the barred carriage. 

Her heart nearly shattered at those words, and a silent tear slid down her cheek as she was loaded into the carriage behind Kaydel. 

"Come, Hux. She played the role very well - but she will be punished accordingly," Pryde stated, lacking the knowledge that Kit had been far more than just a nurse to Hux. "It is of no use to return to D'Qarshire. You are needed in Coruscant. The Colonel will catch up."

Kit heard Pryde speaking with Hux, and rushed to the barred window to catch even a last glimpse of the man she still loved. 

From the gap in the bars, she watched as he nodded silently, before making his way to his horse. But what tore at Kit's heart strings was the look of indifference that he now wore. Had their relationship been so easily torn apart - and had he cared so little for it that he did not even put up a fight to defend her? 

With these thoughts racing through her mind, she followed his movements until he was out of sight. Leaning back into the cool metal of her home for the next few days, Kit raised her knees to her shackled hands in an attempt at self comfort. 

"I'm so sorry," a small voice from the other corner of the carriage spoke. 

With teary eyes, Kit looked to Kaydel - now crumpled on the floor and heaving rattled breaths that sounded as though a lung had been punctured. She should feel anger towards the girl for betraying her - at least for not clarifying that she had no hand in Snoke's death. But as she looked to the younger girl, she felt nothing but pity. 

The poor thing had been tortured for information, and it was likely her divulsion of Kit's actions that had kept her alive to this point. 

"They were going to hurt my family," Kaydel added, now sobbing into the floor. 

Kit could not fault her for that. If she had been in Kaydel's position - if they had threatened to hurt Hux - she would have done the same. 

Feeling a jolt of movement, her head was knocked back against the solid surface and she winced at the pain. Maybe she should have found a way to tell Hux before everything happened. Maybe they could have figured something out and run away together. 

Part of her wished that maybe he still loved her after the betrayal and hurt she had caused him. But dreaming of what could have been was no use, as she was likely to never see him again. For what remained of her life, Kit would cherish those moments spent together, knowing she was never to feel such a way again.

With the sound of hoofbeats, the carriage rattled over the rocky road as it slowly began its journey to the dungeons of the Coruscant palace.   

 

 

 

Notes:

You thought Kit and Hux would just have a peaceful life? WRONG!! They've got more suffering to do. And so we welcome General Pryde into the mix.

Chapter 27: Promises

Notes:

Just a short one to get things rolling

The dungeons of Coruscant were almost identical to those of D'Qarshire. With no natural light and a damp smell about the air, Kit felt as though she were back beneath the depths of the old Resistance base. Now, however, she was on the other side of the bars. And there was no nurse stupid enough to sneak the prisoners food and collaborate with the enemy to organise their escape. 

Just her luck.

The journey from her point of capture had been nothing of note; she and Kaydel were removed from their prison on wheels only to relieve themselves, and were fed a modest ration twice a day. The iron shackles that had been placed around her wrists had started to dig into her skin, and it was hopeless to try and remove them, for struggling against the restraints only hurt her more and wasted whatever precious energy she had. By the fifth day on the road, Kit lost count of where they were and what time it was. She had not seen Hux since her capture, though she was not sure she could bear another look of indifference from him. She and the younger girl had at times attempted to speak with one another, though there was a large slam heard from the driver's compartment whenever one would begin a conversation. With no ability to defend themselves, both women did not wish to risk the ire of the First Order soldiers - tired from being on the road for so long, and without women to warm their beds for even longer. She only hoped that if it came down to it, that Hux would protect her on account of what little affection he may still hold for her. 

But now Kit sat alone in her cell, listening to water drip from some corner of the room. Kaydel had not been taken to the dungeon, and Kit could only dread to think where she may be.

Suprisigly, Kit was not held within solitary confinement, yet all the surrounding cells were void of inhabitants. She had overheard from a guard that Ren had ordered the execution of all Resistance prisoners only days ago.

All except one, it would seem.

"Do you like drawing?"

"Hm?" Kit lifted her head to find where the voice was coming from. 

"I like drawing. But dad says it's a lady's activity. He keeps trying to get me to shoot and play cricket."

Glancing over to the far end of the room, Kit spied a small boy who looked to be no more than six years old. His head had recently been cleanly shaven, and he wore a shirt that was far too big for him. Kit was almost brought out of her self pity at the sight of him, wondering how the First Order could stoop so low so as to imprison a child. At least he had not met the same fate as his parents likely had.

She cleared her throat - hoarse for not using it in well over a week. "I, uh, like drawing too. But I was never any good at it. When I was younger, I preferred to make sculptures."

The boy seemed puzzled at her statement. Kit wondered why it had taken him this long to say anything at all, though she supposed he had been locked down here for quite some time and therefore had become well versed in patience. 

"I've never done that. Only drawing. Maybe father will let me make sculptures instead."

Kit hummed in polite agreement, though she doubted the poor thing would ever see his father again. With her own end likely not too far off, Kit found it terribly hard to care for anything at all in the world anymore. But this little boy still sounded as though he had so much life and hope within him, that she made a mental promise to at least pretend to care for his sake. 

"Do you like music?" she asked. 

Kit heard the distant scuffle of his feet, then saw him standing and leaning up against the bars. "Of course! My mother is the absolute best piano player! You'll have to hear her once we're out of here. She would always play a song after dinner and me and my brother would sing along to it."

His story reminded Kit briefly of Hux and his own tale of his musically skilled mother. Subconsciously, she fidgeted with the silver band still on her ring finger. Kit supposed that she was now unworthy to wear such a piece, and should make efforts to return it prior to her execution. She could do him that small favour at least, so that once he found a more suitable bride with clear allegiance to the Order, he could pass along this small keepsake. 

Kit did not know why part of her still believed that he would come to recue her. Hux did not earn the rank of General overnight; he had worked tirelessly for years and risen through the ranks faster than any regular soldier. With his highly advanced intellect and mind for military strategy, he had earnt the reputation that preceded him. It was completely irrational to believe that he would give up his life's work for a simple girl - one who had betrayed his trust and fed secrets to the enemy no less. 

"I'd like that," Kit said with a light tone, trying to pry her mind away for the man she still loved. 

"Do you like horses?"

---

For the better part of the day, their conversation continued like this. Mason, as Kit had come to learn he was called, was a very inquisitive individual, who liked a lot of things and loved to talk about them even more. 

Though their topics were trivial and child-like, Kit found it nonetheless entertaining and enjoyed being able to share her own life experiences for his entertainment. He particularly liked the story about how she and her sisters would explore the attic of their home in search of ghosts, and how once this accidentally led to the discovery of an equally terrifying spider instead. 

But with such little food, it was inevitable that he would grow tired. Kit felt her own eyes drooping also, and wondered what time it was above the surface. 

She had just about drifted off, when the prison chamber door creaked open and a guard stepped inside, followed by an unknown figure. 

Kit supposed it was just a routine patrol, but when the figure came to stand before her cell, it was then that she finally looked up. 

"Jayne," Kit whispered in a mixture of shock and happiness. Immediately rushing to the bars of her enclosure, Kit reached her arms through in an attempt to hug her sister, but the woman in question took a hasty step backwards until she was out of reach. 

The hurt could not be hidden from Kit's face as she gazed upon her sister from behind bars. Now a married woman, Jayne wore her hair in a neatly braided updo, evidently styled by someone other than herself. She was a Colonel's wife, Kit remembered, which would also explain the fine fabric of her dress and the jewels that hung from her ears. How quickly she had assimilated into her new role. 

"Will you at least look at me, sister?" Kit pleaded, noticing how Jayne kept her gaze to the floor. 

Upon request, Jayne raised her pretty head and met Kit's eyes. She had been faced with that look many times before; once, when Kit had broken Jayne's favourite hairbrush on accident, and again when Kit had refused to take her to a ball that many officers would be attending. 

"Why did you do it?" she asked through gritted teeth, though her voice betrayed her and Kit could hear the sob behind her words. 

Wary of the guard monitoring their conversation, Kit chose her words carefully.

"Jayne, you must see that what the Order are doing is wrong - they've killed innocents. Their power is unchecked, and their leadership is corrupt," she tried to reason. "You of all people should know that," Kit added in clear reference to her brief dalliance with Ren. 

She watched as her sister's face grew immediately pink. "I am loyal to my husband, and I am loyal to the First Order," she said very calmly - almost as if the words had been rehearsed.

Kit sighed, knowing that it was futile to try and have a proper conversation while a guard stood listening to every word. "I'm sure you are," Kit said in defeat. How she wished to ask her sister about the past month - about what Ren had said to coerce her into running away with him. And there was the fact of her mother and her true allegiance. Though she would not dare reveal a word of it while they had company. Implicating their mother would only seek to put more suspicion on her family, and that was the last thing Kit needed. 

She could see that Jayne was about to take her leave. She had intended only a short visit, it would seem. This could possibly be their last moment together, so Kit said to her as she turned her back, "I love you, sister."

Jayne's form stilled. Turning back to face her, Kit could see the tears welling in Jayne's eyes and watched as her bottom lip trembled. 

"You... you are a traitor," she sniffled, "and you are not fit to call yourself my... sister. Good day." Picking up her dainty skirts, Jayne exited the prison chamber and did not look back to Kit. 

Though she knew her sister did not wholly mean those words, they still stung. Hoping that Mason did not have to witness such a tragic exchange between sisters, Kit sat herself back in the corner of her cell and finally allowed her own tears to flow. 

Tears for her sister, who was now subject to the control of the First Order's elites.

Tears for Mason, who would never again hear his mother playing piano and his brother singing. 

And tears for the life that she and Hux might have had, were it not for the brutal regime of the First Order. 

That night - or at least, Kit thought it was night - she cried herself to sleep, until she passed into slumber from exhaustion. 

---

Once more, the sound of the gate opening roused her from her sleep. But it was not Jayne who had come to visit her this time. 

"Right this way, sir."

"Hm, I see that the conditions down here are fitting for her crimes."

"Yes General, though we are awaiting further orders in regards to her execution."

"Ah, well I have another to add to her list. It appears she is a thief as well as a traitor. The prisoner seems to have stolen something belonging to me and I intend to retrieve it."

"Very good sir."

Even the sound of his voice was enough to have her on her feet. The voice that had spoken such remarkable things so softly into her ear was now accusing her of crimes she had no part in. Had her betrayal cut him so deep that he would seek to take revenge on her? Why even bother if she was set to hang anyway? 

Stepping out of the shadows of the prison chamber, she was afforded her first look at him in weeks. Kit was taken aback, noticing that he looked as though he too had spent time in a cell. Hux's already pale complexion seemed to have grown even more translucent, with a cold looking pallor to his cheeks. His eyes, however were the main giveaway, as they were bloodshot and had dark circles forming beneath. What had he been doing to himself? 

"Miss Vara," he all but hissed as he moved towards her cell. 

Her heartbeat quickened as he paced forward. "General," she said back with only half the coldness of his greeting. 

"I believe you have something of mine. I demand you return it," Hux said authoritatively in his voice that Kit knew was reserved for official engagements and dealings with higher-ups. 

He was now practically touching the bars of her cell, and as Kit moved towards him, she brandished her hand with the ring still attached. Slipping her hand through the bar, they were the closest they had been in weeks. She could have easily slid the ring from her own finger, but a selfish part of her heart wanted him to touch her, just one last time. 

He scoffed at her action, leaning a hand down to make contact with her own and pull the ring from her finger.

With their bodies now attached, he moved his head forward almost in between the bars of the cell, so that his face was directly above hers. She thought the movement odd, but then he spoke in a voice almost too quiet to hear. 

"Forgive me. This is the only way." 

She let no emotion betray her features, electing to keep a cold look of dislike as her mask. But within, she felt as though all her prayers had been answered. He had come for her, and that meant that he still cared for her. Whatever mental gymnastics it took him to set aside his own loyalty did not matter to her - only that his indifference had been an act, and would likely be what saved them. 

"She is to be executed - yes? For crimes of treason I believe it was?" Hux asked to the officer over his shoulder, while never breaking eye contact with Kit. 

"Yes sir. General Pryde has ordered it so."

"Ah," he mused. "It seems like a waste, does it not?" 

"I beg your pardon, sir?" the officer asked, confused. 

"Women are few and far between in times such as these. How long has it been since you bedded a lady?" Hux queried, as if to emphasise his point. 

Kit winced internally, praying that Mason was still sleeping and did not have to overhear this.

The young officer was visibly uncomfortable at the General's line of questioning and stuttered for a moment. "Uh, not since last year," he admitted. 

Hux hummed in acknowledgement. "With such... sparse options available, I find myself rather ravenous. I could think of a far better punishment for her than simply hanging," Hux said devilishly, truly selling the act.  

The guard laughed nervously, as if agreeing. For a brief moment, Kit swore she could feel the younger man's lecherous gaze run along her body, but it was halted when Hux reached though the bars and grasped Kit's chin in a way that appeared outwardly rough, but felt no more than a gentle pressure. 

"What say you, Resistance scum? How would you like to be my whore?"

It was now her turn to play along. "I will never submit to you," she grit out, pretending to thrash about in his grasp. 

He laughed darkly at her actions. "Oh, you will." Now he turned back to the guard. "Have her bathed and her wounds treated. Then have her brought to my chambers. I want no man to touch a hair on her head, am I understood?" 

The guard nodded his understanding, before saluting the General. 

For the briefest of moments when he was sure the guard was not watching, Hux's eyes softened as he stared back at Kit - a silent promise that his love still held true. 

She gave a similar look, and wished nothing more than to be able to reach out and grasp his hand in her own. 

Reluctantly, the General took his leave, as the guard came to open her cell and lead her out by the chains connecting her shackles. 

The loud clinking sound must have awoken Mason, for she found him sitting up and watching her movements. She gave the boy a small smile and a quick nod as she was ushered out the door - an attempt to reassure him that all was well. 

Walking up the flights of stairs, her legs felt like jelly; unused to such a task after lying around for so long. But as they reached the exit of the dungeon, she was greeted with a gilded courtyard overgrown with greenery and bathing in sunlight. Bar Hux, the sight was the most beautiful thing she had seen in weeks and she took a deep breath of the crisp air that lacked the mildew of the dungeons. 

Somewhere in her stomach, that small flicker of hope was reignited, as she wondered what her new reality in this world was to look like. 

Chapter 28: Bandages

The thought of a bath was actually quite alluring to Kit. After having gone many days without bathing, the clothes she wore had started to stiffen with the combination of sweat and dirt that had also come to blanket her skin. How Hux had not been immediately repulsed by her scent was unknown to her, yet she had become numb to the filth of her surroundings. 

Even as she trudged along the outer courtyards of the castle in bare feet, she could not feel the chill of the cobbles or the jagged edges of some particularly rough stones. The grounds were mostly empty, though they passed the odd officer or lady inspecting what looked to be newly planted blooms. And when they passed her, none could conceal their look of disgust at her attire. 

Kit merely stared back and dared them to continue their ogling of the prisoner. 

As the young officer ushered her towards the bathhouse, Kit could feel the sores on her wrist re-opening from the tension of the chains. If they could provide her some supplies, she would dress the wounds herself. However she highly doubted that the resident nurse or doctor would be willing to provide any such materials to a prisoner and traitor accused of such heinous crimes as she was. 

Kit was only grateful that her own nurses were still back in D'Qarshire with the regiment. They had undoubtedly been told the tale of her betrayal, but for them to see how she had fallen was another thing. Especially since now she was to be Hux's whore. 

What that actually entailed, she did not know. But he had said it was the only way. For now, that was enough to ease her nerves and remove any ideas of an escape attempt from her mind. She wondered now how Poe was able to get so many Resistance members out of the dungeon without being caught - purely from the information she had fed him and the hair pin she had smuggled in. There must have been someone on the inside to assist in such a feat - though Kit could not confidently say who, and would rather not know in case she were arrested again and submitted to the same form of torture that Kaydel had been.

Kit felt a harsh tug on her chains. 

"Keep moving. The General is not a patient man and I'll not have my head on the block because some harlot wanted to stop and smell the roses," the officer said through gritted teeth. 

Kit had never considered herself an angry individual, however this officer was testing her patience. Prior to Hux's appearance in the cells, she had lost any fights she had in her. But seeing him had given her a rush of adrenaline that she was now buzzing with - and converting into seething anger towards her impatient captor. 

The glare she gave him was fuelled with such deep hatred that for a moment Kit felt as though she were a wild animal on a leash, merely waiting for her moment to attack. The First Order had reduced her to nothing more than her base instincts, yet her stubbornness and desire to bring down the Order outweighed her personal need to tear through the jugular of some officer. 

So she allowed herself to be led and despite the pain, maintained the tension from the chains so that his job was not an easy one. 

As they came upon the large marble columns of what Kit assumed was the bathhouse, the officer halted as if unsure how to proceed. She stared across at his pudgy face and had to hold her tongue from asking what the sudden issue was. 

Her question seemed to be answered when she noted a flock of young ladies passing by the grand façade, all dressed in a strikingly familiar uniform. It would appear that nurse uptake numbers were higher in the capitol, for the girls were young enough that they were evidently new recruits. With the red cross on their left arm, and a neatly starched apron void of blood, Kit tried to contain her scoff. Maybe they were genuinely interested in the profession of nursing, but from the way they whispered and giggled while passing the officer, Kit possessed a feeling that it was a husband in uniform they were after, rather than an occupation. 

Run in the other direction she wished to tell them. But she was a hypocrite for even thinking such a thing while romantically attached to the General of the entire army. Gosh, she was just as bad as them. 

She continued to watch as the young man's head followed the flock's movement until they were out of sight. Only once the sound of their chirping had faded did he remember his task at hand and dragged Kit inside. 

Coruscant was a city unlike any other, due to the ancient architecture that remained from times long forgotten. It was now of course interspersed with the grand buildings erected in the years since, but the castle maintained much of the ancient charm that existed long before the First Order. Moving through the bathhouse, Kit could not help but admire the beautiful columns and carvings that lined the hallway of the large building. Instead of wood, white coloured stone bore the foundations of each wall and ceiling, though each chamber had now been separated by a recently constructed door. The ancient inhabitants must have been far more liberal in sharing the experience of bathing. Though Kit supposed such displays would never be tolerated by the Fist Order. 

The steam emanating from each of the individual rooms was a nice sensation against her thinly clothed skin, and Kit was reminded of the rooms of Canady Hall that always seemed to be several degrees warmer than comfortable. She wondered if word had passed to Dany and Canady - imagining the near heart attack that her sister would face. Since the way she was treated during their last meeting, Kit had no desire to see them ever again. And though her heart ached for the loss of her little sister, both of them were fundamentally different people with differences that could not be reconciled. Her circle of people she could trust was growing smaller by the day, yet Kit still held onto a slither of hope for Jayne. 

"Milson - what've you got there?" came a voice just up ahead through a cloud of steam. 

The officer chuckled and drew Kit's chains forward. Stumbling at the sudden movement, she lost her footing and found herself colliding with the white stone of the floor. With her arms still held aloft by the pull of the chains, her shoulder took the brunt of the force and she could already tell it would leave a bruise. She would delight in telling Hux of her treatment from this oaf. 

Lifting her face just slightly off the ground, Kit saw another officer - stationed outside one of the doors. 

"Some traitor bitch from D'Qarshire. They were gonna hang her, but the General wants a go at her before they do anything," he said smugly, nudging Kit's side with the tip of his shoe. She made to get up, but with the way he was holding her chains, she could not remove herself from the ground.

The other officer chuckled at her movements before kneeling down to look at her more closely. "Hux is a sick bastard alright. Must've got tired paying for whores. Who can blame him?" That last question was said with a lecherous look over her body, before he moved a hand to grasp her hair. 

Unable to watch his movements, Kit made a panicked sound at the contact, feeling him tighten his grip and turn her head towards him. With her head held aloft by his meaty hand, she was now accosted with the sight of a man no older than twenty, with crooked teeth and a nose too large for his face. There was something sinister about the way he looked at her her, grinning as she winced from the pain. 

"Wonder what she'd feel like. Have you had a go yet?"

The officer holding her chains - Milson, the other one had called him - seemed taken aback by his friend's question. "Uh, not yet. Might later," he said unconvincingly.

The officer with the crooked teeth chuckled. "There's a room empty up the back. Got some time to spare?"

Kit's stomach dropped, and the urge to scream was coming on quickly. She was so close to being safe once more, and she would not allow anyone to compromise that. 

Just as she was about to thrash violently from his hold and yell for help, odd footsteps were heard from down the hall. It sounded as though one foot was pressing harder than the other, creating a strange rhythm in which Kit imagined its owner slightly limping down the hall. 

"Gentlemen, is there any reason that you are manhandling a lady in such a way?" 

The voice was feminine and clearly lacked any real sort of concern. It sounded as though she were used to these antics. 

The officer loosened his grip on her hair only slightly, to speak to the woman who had interrupted them. "This one is bound for the General's bed."

Milson cleared his throat before clarifying, "She is a prisoner and I have been sent to have her bathed and delivered to his quarters." 

There was a pause. 

"Ah. I see. Well, I shall take over her care and see her delivered to the General. You may be on your way now."

Kit breathed an audible sigh of relief, feeling the grip on her hair loosen completely and the tension of her chains let down. She heard the officer scoff quietly as he was forced to move away from her. Finally able to use her bound hands, Kit pushed herself off the ground until she was standing once more. 

Wasting no time, Milson handed her chains to the woman, whose back was now to Kit as she led her into one of the private bathing rooms. It was then that Kit noticed the grey uniform and patch on the sleeve. 

However, unlike the young recruits she had seen before, the red cross on her arm was accompanied by an additional band of red along the top of her right shoulder. She had worn something similar upon her promotion to head nurse - short as that time may have been. 

The world seemed to slow as Kit took in the back of the figure before her. Unusually tall for a woman, and with short, cropped hair the colour of snow. Even from behind she was recognisable. How had she not noticed it at first? 

As the woman closed the door to the room behind Kit, she turned to reveal the face of Head Nurse Phasma. 

Though her initial feeling was one of shock, it soon turned to elation at the sight of a familiar - and friendly - face. Kit felt a tear well in her eye merely at the sight of her former mentor, noticing that despite her severe leg injury, she was up and walking and an army nurse once more. 

It felt childish, but Kit felt an instinctual desire to hug Phasma. Though her hands were still bound, Kit raised them up and stepped closer to her old friend. Drawing nearer, she was about to make contact with their bodies, before she felt her chains being yanked down with such force that she hissed in pain. 

Regaining her senses, Kit looked up slowly to the woman she had thought to call a friend. 

What she was met with was anything but. 

From her height, Phasma looked down at Kit with such disgust that the younger woman almost felt like cowering under her gaze. Just as Milson had before, Phasma pulled taught on the tension, but with more strength than the man had. 

Now she was forced up and dangerously close to Phasma, attempting to inch away from the woman who was now terrifying in her demeanour. 

"When I heard about what you did, I didn't believe them. Thought they must have had you confused for some other imbecile," she spat out. "But now that I see you, I have no doubt in my mind that you were a traitor all along," she chuckled darkly. 

Gone was Kit's fight once more. To hear someone she had been close to say such words - it felt more painful than the physical harm that had been inflicted upon her. 

"Phasma... please, you are hurting me," Kit croaked out. 

The taller woman simply gave a scoff. "That is nothing in comparison to the pain you have inflicted upon the First Order from your betrayal."

"Pain - to the Order? Phasma do you hear yourself? The Order has never-"

"Quiet!" she interrupted. 

Kit winced. 

Phasma continued, "Because of your meddling, the King is dead." Phasma was breathing heavily now, betraying just how much of a First Order loyalist she truly was. "Whatever Hux does to you - I hope it is a fate worse than death. It is the least you deserve."

At that, Phasma released her hold on Kit's chains and unlocked them with the small key she had been given by Milson. 

Still in a state of shock, Kit merely stood there. Phasma seemed to take delight in the reaction she had earned from Kit, knowing that the girl would not try to make an escape on account of her present mental state. 

Only moments ago, she had been fuelled by her feelings of hatred and anger. But now she was overcome with a feeling of utter despair.

With a sneer, Phasma gripped the shoulders of Kit's worn and grimy dress, before yanking it down with such force that it tore as she removed the cloth from her body. Standing now in only her chemise, Kit merely looked to the ground as Phasma made quick work of her last piece of modesty before she was left bare in the steaming room. 

Kit felt all too vulnerable in this situation, as Phasma circled around her naked body like a hawk. 

"Get in," she ordered, pushing Kit to a small copper tub that sat beside a small repository of water  - what Kit imagined would have served as the bath itself in times long gone. Now it was where the warm bath water was sourced from. 

Dipping her toe into the steaming liquid, she followed with the rest of her body until she could completely submerge her torso. Phasma remained, now collecting a bucket of hot water from the repository. 

Kit had only a moment to take a breath before Phasma was dumping it over her head. 

"Got to have your hair looking nice for the General," she said in a mocking tone. 

Kit spluttered and wiped the strands of soaking hair from her face. This felt like some sort of psychological torture. 

Seeming to notice Kit's lack of movement within the tub, Phasma scoffed before taking a sponge and all but throwing it into her tub. "Get your disgusting body clean and maybe then I shall consider attending to your festering wounds."

Kit hesitantly took the sponge and began to remove the grime from her body. With Phasma watching her every move, not even the hot water could relax her muscles. As she grazed across her skin, there were many points that ached upon touching, and Kit could see a dark blue blooming at multiple locations. 

Having determined that she was sufficiently clean, Phasma ordered Kit out of the tub and to sit on the wooden stool by the corner. 

Doing as she was told, Kit considered asking for a towel to allow her body to dry, yet she knew the question would only be met with a sneer or even another bucket of water thrown over her head. 

As her bare behind came in contact with the stool, she sat and tried to cover her modesty with her hands before Phasma snatched her left arm away from where it had been shielding her breasts. 

"How he will even look at you in this state is a wonder to me," she remarked while dousing Kit's shredded wrist with a brown solution, before wrapping it in a clean bandage. "Though I suppose as long as your cunt is intact that is all that matters."

She could not look at Phasma after that remark. As a fellow woman who had likely also encountered the same demoralising experiences that came with being of their sex, Kit could not understand how Phasma could so easily reduce another woman to her sexual uses. 

Grasping her other arm, Phasma picked a small piece of dirt from the wound before giving it the same treatment as the other. After a final once-over of Kit's body, Phasma was satisfied that there were no more wounds that required attention. She commanded her to stand, before throwing a piece of cloth in her direction that Kit realised she was to use as a towel. 

Her wrists did feel far better, but Phasma had wound the bandages extremely tight - leaving Kit to struggle with her range of motion. As she pat dry the remaining droplets of water, Phasma opened a small chest before presenting Kit with a clean chemise by throwing it in her direction as she had the cloth. Awaiting the rest of her dress, Kit blushed upon realising that it was not to come. 

Phasma gave a sardonic smirk at the sudden redness of her cheeks, and watched in grim delight as Kit raised the gown over her head and attempted to smooth it down so that it did not draw attention to her body underneath. Though the fabric was thin, Kit was thankful that the chemise was clean and provided even a small bit of modesty. She had considered that Phasma would parade her to Hux's quarters completely naked, but maybe that was just a step too far. 

Phasma cocked her head to the side and gave a small chuckle. "Now, I assume that we will not be needing the shackles again; the castle is ridiculously over-fortified and you would not evade the notice of a single officer looking like that." Kit grimaced. "You are to stay by my side until we reach his room. Are we clear?"

Kit nodded.

"Are we clear?" Phasma said with more force.

"Yes," Kit said in a whisper.

"Good. Your new master awaits."

Notes:

Bit of a filler, but we have seen the return of Phasma! Lmk what you thought

Chapter 29: Deception

Standing before the grand oak doors to Hux's chambers, Kit did not know how to feel. One part of her soul was yearning to simply be near him again, away from the eyes of the world and back within his touch. The other more pragmatic part told her that she was walking into the chambers of one of the highest ranking officials of the First Order, and that there still existed an inherent threat now that her loyalties to the Resistance had been made public. 

As Phasma came to stand behind her, she could practically feel the older woman's glare searing into her back. 

"Do not slouch. You are being presented to the General as a gift. Act like it."

Reluctantly, Kit stood ever so straighter, feeling the strain on her lungs as too much air entered them. She had become accustomed to crouching and lying down the past few days she had been confined to her cell. 

She did not know what Phasma was waiting for, but Kit did not wish to be so bold as to knock on the door herself. 

Phasma let out a sigh. "I presume you know how the act is done - yes?" she said in the softest tone Kit had heard from her all day. 

Kit nodded, face flushing with red as she realised everyone within the palace would believe that Hux had been bedding her. 

"Good. Then you know to lie on your back, spread your legs and let him take his fill. That will please him. The General does not accept incompetence - in any aspect of his life," Phasma added in a more gruff tone.

Kit had to pause for a moment. Since when had Phasma become so knowledgeable about Hux's life? 

"I see."

"And for your sake, do try to avoid becoming with child. The General will not tolerate any bastards - though I can't imagine he'd keep you around long enough for that to happen. You're simply warming his bed until he finds a wife suitable to his station." 

With that final statement, Phasma strode forward and gave four knocks to the door. 
Kit's heart sank at Phasma's mention of a wife. Not even two weeks ago he had held her within his arms and promised that they would one day be wed. Were these plans now different - and such public knowledge? Once again, that dreadful doubt crept into the corners of her mind, questioning everything she had done up until this moment. 

It was at that very instant that the grand doors swung open to reveal the General - eyes still bloodshot and telling of his lack of sleep. The breath was nearly knocked out of Kit at seeing him once more, and her face clearly showed it.
His gaze was completely fixated on her and though his stoic expression gave nothing away, she noticed the small flare of his nostrils that indicated he was holding back. What torture it was just staring at each other like this. 

"General, here is the girl as requested. I have personally seen to her care. As it appears, she is free of diseases and lice-"

"Though not injury, it would appear," Hux remarked, never breaking eye contact with Kit. 

"Sorry General?"

Stepping out of the doorway now, Hux came to stand directly in front of Kit before lightly grazing a hand over her exposed shoulder - revealing a small bruise. The effect of his touch was instantaneous, sending shivers along her skin. She had not even noticed the bruise.

"This was not here before. I specifically asked that no man touch a hair on her head," he looked even closer at it. "Who has done this to you?" now speaking to Kit. 

Looking up from the ground, she felt safe enough to speak with Hux present. But Phasma cut in before she could start. "My General, it was likely sustained while the prisoner was-"

"I did not ask you," he seethed.
 
Kit cleared her throat. "Milson, I think his name was. And his friend who was patrolling the bath house. They pulled my chains so that I would fall. And they..." she stuttered, not sure what would happen if she finished her sentence in front of Phasma. 

"Go on," Hux said gently, as if he had forgotten Phasma was there. 

Kit merely looked at the ground before continuing, "They had planned to take turns with me before handing me over to you."

At that, Hux could hardly contain the visible rage from spreading across his features. She could practically hear his teeth grinding as he let out a deep sigh of anger. "Phasma, stop by the barracks on your way back."

Then nurse was a little startled at the odd request. "Yes sir... what for, might I ask?"

Hux chuckled darkly. "Find the name of this other officer." Kit could see his knuckles turning white from where they were clenched. "Inform the two of them that I wish to have a private audience tomorrow morning. You are dismissed."

Phasma's eyes widened at the request, but she just nodded before backing away and heading in the direction they had come. 

Now it was just the two of them. Alone. For the first time since everything had transpired.

With Phasma out of sight, it was as if his body could finally relax and he could relinquish the role of General. Now, with his hair drooping in front of his face and his eyebrows creased with such worry and concern, he was Armitage Hux once more. 

Searching her eyes with his own, he made to speak, but thought better of it after looking down the corridor each way. Instead, he took Kit's hand into his own, drawing her into his room where he closed the door behind them. 

For a moment they were silent, just looking between each other, unsure where they stood. 
But within the same instant,  she was pulled into his body for the tightest embrace of her life. His hands did not roam, but simply held Kit in place behind her neck and about the waist. Unlike the embraces they had shared before, this one was desperate and needy - no words exchanged as they clung to each other as though it were anchoring them to the earth. 

With his head resting in the crook of her neck, he inhaled the scent of her skin and Kit could feel Hux's warm breath make its way down her collarbone, bringing goosebumps to the surface. How she had dreamt of this moment while locked in her cell. 

She came to wrap her arms around his torso and buried her face into his chest, remembering just how tall her General was. She could feel the pulse of his heart, erratic but gradually steadying with every second they were together. 

For several moments they stood like that - just needing to feel the other's embrace to be reminded that they were both there in that room. Safe. 

Their worlds had come to a grinding halt after Kit's capture, and there was so much to be discussed. But it was too much - there were simply too many things that Kit was unsure of and frightened by. She did not even know if she were to be executed in the morning. As a frightfully independent individual, such fears and uncertainty were not within her character. Yet the First Order were awfully adept at breaking one down to their most vulnerable state, until all that was left was the mere husk of the person before. 

So in a rare moment of vulnerability, she cried.

Not the single stream of tears Kit had shed when she had found out about the fate of her mother, or even the time Hux left for a month in Arkanis. These were full bodied, flowing streams that had built up over the past few weeks and were finally ready to flow. 

As she sobbed into his military tunic, Kit mourned the loss of her life before she became entangled with the First Order. Though she had been nothing but an un-wed governess with no excitement in her life, she was never exposed to such physical and mental harm as the Order had inflicted upon her. She cried for the days of her childhood spent with her sisters by the willow tree when they had searched for tadpoles and fairies, before they were wed and had families of their own. Yet as she took in a shuddering breath between sobs, Kit realised that her life had actually never been free from the First Order. 

Her mother had died delivering news of the Order's invasion to the Resistance; her father had been a Colonel in the Order; the current heir to the throne had sent him to the front to die; she herself had joined up in an attempt to get closer to said heir; she had let him touch her body in ways that made her sick to think of; she had helped Resistance members escape the Order; and she was promptly thrown into chains because of it. But through it all, she had found a rare few that had made her tribulations worth the pain she endured. 

Noticing the shaking of her body, Hux smoothed a hand up and down her back. "It's alright - It's alright. You're here now, you're with me. They will not take you again," he whispered to her. Though it sounded as though he was providing himself assurance as much as he was her.

How could he stand to hold her with such softness - cradle her body as if he craved every fibre of her being - when she had betrayed the cause he had dedicated his life to? She did love him, that much was a given fact. But she would not allow him to love her under the pretence of a lie. Maybe he believed her to be falsely accused - despite her clear admission of guilt when Pryde had captured her. No, she could not allow him to feel such tenderness for her without knowing who she truly was. She owed him that at the very least. 

Steadying her breaths, she removed herself from his hold, though he still maintained a grasp on her waist. Wiping the wetness from her eyes, she could not bear to look at him with what she was about to say. Keeping her gaze fixed on the floor, she sniffled once before preparing the words she should have told him long ago.

"Hux, I need to tell you something and I need you to listen before you say anything to me you might regret." She did not hear him try to cut in, so she deemed it safe to continue. "You know that I was accused of aiding the Resistance, by helping the prisoners escape. Of that I am completely guilty," she said with a pause. "Since that night you requested that I treat Dameron's wounds, I found myself questioning the rule of the First Order and the actions of Ren. After everything he did and what I have seen the regime do to its people... I couldn't stand by and play an active role in the success of such a corrupt and evil rule. So I helped them. I fed Dameron any information I could about the Order's plans, and even smuggled in food and a pin to pick the locks." Kit nearly chuckled to herself at the absurdity of it all. "But despite my hatred for the First Order, I found myself falling in love with you. At first, I thought you overly proud and unpleasant. But somewhere underneath all that snark and austerity," she laughed through sniffles, "I saw your warmth and kindness. So what I'm trying to say, is that while I may have deceived you into believing I was loyal to the First Order, my love for you is undeniably real. And though you are loyal to the Order-"

"Kit-"

"Please, let me finish," she pleaded, holding back another wave of tears. "Though you are loyal, I still love you. But I cannot allow you to hold out hope that I will change loyalties." She let out a ragged breath, and her words were shaky. "I cannot go back. So I cannot let you love me because you think that I will change my mind. It will crush me to lose you, but we both deserve to be loved without lying to one another."

Letting those words hang in the air for a moment, Kit was surprised at how well she vocalised that which had been on her mind for several months now. It felt cathartic. Though still she could not look at him, ashamed at having deceived him for so long.

Feeling Hux loosen his hold on her, Kit feared the worst. But then he was kneeling before her, grasping her hand in his own. 

She could not avoid his gaze now, as he stared up at her with equally tearful eyes. Placing a soft kiss to her hands, he mumbled something into them that she could not quite hear. Though as he repeated it, she could make it out. 

"Forgive me, Kit. I am so sorry." 

That had not been the reaction she was expecting. Though it was not a refusal of his love. 

"What for, Armitage?" she said with such gentleness as she stroked his fiery mess of hair. 
Looking up at her with those red, watery eyes, he looked so young, and Kit wondered just what had rendered him so. 

"I have deceived you too," he spoke, still gripping onto her hand. 

"H-how?" Kit asked, now quite panicked. 
Hux looked conflicted for a moment; his eyes darting around the room as if searching for the words to say. As if resigned to whatever he had been hiding, he winced before speaking, "I am also part of the Resistance... I'm the spy."

The breath was completely knocked from her at his admission. 

General Armitage Hux - Resistance spy. 
It could not be. He had despised Ren, that was for certain. But the Order was his entire life. He'd been in the academy since he was old enough to write, and his father had been instrumental in the formation of the Order itself. How then, did Hux come to betray everything he had ever known?

"You... but you can't be... you were so... loyal," Kit spoke mainly to herself.

He gave a grimace. "That is why it worked so well. Who would suspect someone as high ranking as me to be sharing military secrets with the enemy?"

Still coming to terms with what he had just told her, Kit's mind was reeling with every interaction she had ever had with Hux - every time he had ever given an order or sent a missive to the the war office. How many of those had been for the Resistance? 

"I need to sit down," Kit admitted, coming to join Hux at his place on the ornate wooden floorboards. He helped her to the ground, holding her still close to him. 

"Kit, I cannot express how sorry I am for what happened - for what they did to you. I had known that there were other Resistance members within our ranks, but I had never imagined that included you," he sighed. "I had wanted to tell you the truth, ever since we became romantically involved, but... I was selfish and did not want to end what we had. For that I am so sorry." Now, he turned in his position so that he was facing her directly. In a bold move, he came to gently cradle her head in his hands, so they were looking straight into each other's eyes.  "I know my words cannot undo what has been done, but if you can ever find it in your heart to forgive me, know that I have always loved you - even when I believed you to be loyal to the Order - there is no force on this earth that could stop what my heart feels for you."

The world around her went silent. It felt like she was underwater, with the way in which everything was muffled and the air was cool. But through the haze she could see the man that she loved, on his knees and pleading with her for forgiveness. But Kit could not understand why; they had both deceived the other in the same manner. Hux thought it to be his greatest betrayal - Kit saw it as the greatest outcome that could have arisen. 

So she laughed. 

How fortunate had she been to have fallen in love with the one high ranking member of the First Order who not only was at his heart a good person, but was actually a member of the Resistance all along? There was such irony in the situation that she could not contain her humour. 

It seemed to startle the General, as he looked at her with a hint of confusion. He had probably been expecting her to reject him - in the same way she had expected him to after finding out about her deception. 

To reassure him of any doubts, she took his face in her hand the way he had before, and kissed him through her odd mixture of laughter and tears. Though he was stunned by the action, Hux reciprocated immediately, allowing himself to hold her closer once more. 

Breaking apart, she rested her forehead on his. "We have both been fools, it would appear."

Relief was visible in Hux's eyes, as he let out a small chuckle of his own. "Yes, yes it would seem so."

Letting her fingers trace along the sides of his jaw she was immediately reminded that all of this was real. She was not in the cells, and the man she loved was holding her tightly. "There is nothing to forgive, Armitage. You do not know what a relief it is to hear that you deceived me. Though if we had had this conversation several months ago-"

"I know," he admitted, blushing under her gentle beratement. "I didn't want to lose you."

She smiled. "Me neither. That night by the fireplace, after our... activities... I nearly told you. Buy you had me so lovestruck that I couldn't bring myself to do it." 

Sighing, he kissed her again, delighting in the way she melted for him. "The day they took you away, having to  fake indifference was the hardest thing I have ever done. I should have fought them - or told them you were already my wife, or-"

"You couldn't have done anything to stop it from happening. There were near twenty officers accompanying Pryde. And even if you had told them we were wed, it would have implicated you too," Kit countered. "It is in the past - let it remain there." 

"For someone so young you are wise beyond your years," he said with a chuckle. 

Now practically sitting on his lap, Kit had so many questions that needed answering. And Hux was all too willing to give answers. 

"You mentioned that there were other Resistance members in camp - who are they?"

His eyebrows shot up, surprised at how quickly Kit got to the point of things. "You'd be pleased to know that Mitaka is also one of us. He is the only one who knows of my loyalties."

Kit scoffed in shock. "Dopheld? Is my sister aware of such? When she visited me in the cells she seemed under the control of the Order."

"I believe he informed her prior to their wedding. He was adamant that she know before committing their lives to each other. An admirable notion, but we are simply fortunate that your sister has kept the secret. She does not know of my loyalties, but you may tell her now that you know. I imagine she was merely playing the role of the loyal wife when she visited you."

That seemed to satisfy Kit. "Anyone else?"

Hux smirked to himself. "Now that you mention it, I do not know how I never suspected you as Resistance; you managed to surround yourself with many of our known agents. Officer Finn and your friend Rey were also recruited - by Dameron no less."

"It is honestly a relief."

"Though they were not the best at their scheming - they had been sending weapons and medical supplies to Resistance bases, but they did not have the foresight to find replacements for what was taken. I had to forge some documents to ensure their little ploy was a success."

That made Kit giggle. "Oh yeah? Then what little schemes were you working on, General?" she challenged. 

"Re-instating Queen Organa as ruler and taking down all First Order elite."

"Oh," Kit said, surprised at the bluntness of his answer. 

"We had intended to start with the assassination of Snoke, but someone already took care of that."

She inspected his expression. "You think Ren did it?"

"There is no doubt in my mind. He had just been named heir, and he also just happened to be the first to find Snoke after his untimely demise. He had all the motivation." 

"I suppose that makes your job easier?"

Hux considered it. "Except that now Ren will be harder to reach. He was our main target, considering how old Snoke was. Though in an odd turn of events, Ren will be crowned with the full legitimacy of his birth right - except for the fact that his mother is living." 

Kit had almost forgotten that Ren was actually the legitimate heir to the throne. She had enjoyed the days her mind had been free of him. It was hard to believe that she had once cared for the man. 

"Let us not talk about him. I'm tired and I don't want to think about that man for any longer than I need to." Kit seemed to emphasise her point with a large yawn.

He gave an understanding look at that, and made to stand up. Offering her his hand, he hauled Kit to her feet before scooping her up bridal style and walking across the room.

Letting out a shriek of surprise, she wrapped her arms around Hux's neck and held on tight. 

"It might only be mid afternoon, but I would gladly spend until tomorrow lying in bed with you." 

Kit chuckled into his shoulder. "I think I could live with that." 

As she looked around the room, Kit only now realised how ornate his quarters were. Decked out in varnished wood and dark red drapery, she wondered what the royal chambers looked like if this was that of a General. It seemed he even had another room connecting to this one - where she supposed he kept his study and library. 

Hux placed her gently on the bed before moving over her and claiming her mouth for another kiss. It was not heated in the way their kisses had been during their stay at Colonel House, though it did bring a thought to Kit's mind. 
"How will this situation work?" she asked, breaking their kiss to look up at him. 

He looked down at her quizzically, all red lips and messy hair - unsure what exactly she meant.

She tried again, "In the cells, you said I was to be your... whore."

Almost immediately, Hux moved off of her and came to lay on his side next to her. "Kit, please forgive me. I hope you know that just then I was not trying to-"

"No, I didn't think you-," she sighed in frustration at her poor timing. "Sorry, I should have chosen a better time. But the thought just occurred to me. Do you keep me locked in here? Parade me about like some war trophy? Am I allowed to go anywhere without supervision?"

He considered it for a moment. "I cannot imagine keeping you confined to my chambers, though I do not imagine you would be afforded free roam of the palace considering what you have been charged with. There may be some parading involved, just to sell the act. Is there anywhere in particular you'd like to go? I can possibly arrange for someone loyal to me to accompany you."

"I'd like to go back to the cells."

He looked astonished. "You just got out."

Wrapping her arms around Hux's torso, she let out another yawn. "There's a little boy down there - Mason. He reminds me of you actually. I think his parents are dead, and he's all alone. We got talking while I was there and I'd like to visit him if I can."

He hummed in agreement. "Maybe I can sneak him out. Or set him to work as my cup bearer as a guise. He'd be fed properly then, at least." He punctuated his sentence with a long yawn. 

Though she would have liked to continue their discussion, she could see her lover losing energy by the second. "You need rest - possibly more than me," Kit stated, looking once more at the dark circles under his eyes. 

"I do not think I slept at all the entire time you were away from me," Hux admitted, again with a yawn.

"Well, I think we best remedy that."

"I like your thinking," Hux said, allowing his eyes to close as he drew Kit deeper into his embrace. It was quiet for a short while, and Kit falsely believed him to be asleep. "I would have levelled cities to get you back," he whispered sleepily into her hair, as if an afterthought he had forgotten to express in their earlier reconciliation. 

"I know. And I love you for it," she responded, relishing in the feel of his arms wrapped around her. 

The pair dozed off instantly, and despite Kit's snoring, remained that way until the sun was well over the horizon the next morning. 

Notes:

These kids are finally back together. Please lmk how you thought I handled Hux's spy admission. Surely it can't be any worse than the movie lol.