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Overnight guests are strictly prohibited.
This rule is just one of many Xingqiu's parents have imposed on him over the years. The rules of the house are non negotiable. It's simply how his parents enforced their expectations and protected their family name.
In his youth, he had accepted these rules without complaint, eager to please and desperate to be a good son. And, truthfully... He never had a reason to break this particular rule, did he? His circle of friends wasn't the sort interested in sleepovers. At most, he's had Chongyun over a few times, but that was always after an injury or a hard day's training, and never overnight.
As he matured, most of his parents' older rules gradually lost their importance. Why would he need to remember silly things like the exact hour he was expected to return home when the pile of responsibilities demanding his attention grew larger every day?
So the 'no overnight guests' rule, much like many others from his childhood, eventually just... slipped Xingqiu's mind altogether.
Until now, apparently.
Because when he's cuddled up under the covers in the privacy of his own bedroom, all Xingqiu can focus on is the unfairness of being forced to spend his nights cold and alone. All he can think about is how deliciously warm his beloved would feel tucked against his side in this very bed — like the perfect living space heater.
...Well, no. If Xingqiu is being honest with himself, it's more than that.
Ever since last week, when Xianyun... Tried to help Gaming with something that had been weighing on him for a long, long time...
No, there's no other way to explain it. She kidnapped him for a rather daring plan to get them together — which, mind you, Xingqiu has absolutely no complaints with. Her plan was rather clever and he found her company enjoyable, but her motivations were certainly questionable...
Anyway! That eventful day led to an important revelation.
Gaming likes him.
In the heat of the adrenaline fueled moment, the boy had admitted as much. In fact, his beloved's feelings were a bit... strong, for lack of a better word. The memory of the boy's frantic word vomit as he tries to explain himself, head buried into Xingqiu's neck. The strength in those trembling arms that were wrapped around him like a vice, and the noises he made in response to even the smallest touch were branded into his mind. He could scarcely forget that afternoon if he tried, and it certainly kept him occupied throughout the following day, and the next, and the next...
And it was that thought, like so many others involving his larger than life beloved, that inevitably leads Xingqiu to do something really, really stupid. Multifaceted in the stupidity of it. A tower of stupidity that grows taller and taller with every day he lets his crush fester until it becomes a feeling he has absolutely no idea how to even begin approaching.
Because Xingqiu isn't exactly sure where he's supposed to take this.
Yes, Gaming is his beloved, that much Xingqiu knows without question. That much is fact, like how the sky is blue, grass is green, and there will be snowfall on Dragonspine. And yes, Gaming did dramatically confess his undying affections during that ridiculous hostage situation orchestrated by a well-meaning Xianyun.
But, putting that heartfelt confession aside, they've never actually... discussed things. Never agreed upon entering an official courtship, nor outlined the parameters of their relationship in any sort of formal sense, despite the sparks of attraction that have been crackling between them like a downed powerline.
What if Gaming has secretly regretted confessing but doesn't know how to take back? What if he doesn't truly want this — doesn't want Xingqiu — in the way his fragile heart continues to hope for?
...What if Gaming only found him aesthetically attractive? An object of desire to be chased for his beauty?
Well... Maybe that would be fine too. Xingqiu isn't delusional enough to believe a relationship can last without mutual attraction. He'd be overjoyed if he was able to experience even a fraction of what the romance books described. Still, the thought of that possibility stings in a way Xingqiu doesn't like.
And it is precisely because he's terrified of the prospect of ruining this precious relationship that he has remained silent for this long, forcing himself to be content with a platonic closeness that he has imagined going further many times.
Still, that wouldn't explain how the two of them ended up where they are now, with Xingqiu leading Gaming by the hand towards his bedroom window with the intent of smuggling him inside to stay the night.
To have his beloved come to him under cover of darkness — An illicit, forbidden affair. To feel each others' skin, to intertwine and explore and explore and explore until they knew nothing else... That's what these things usually lead to, right? After such a confession, it's only natural that their feelings would reach their peak. The peak being...?
So far, Xingqiu's half baked plan has been going smoothly, all things considered. Of course it has. He's been meticulously planning for this since that day. It simply can't go wrong at the last possible hurdle—
"Xingqiu... your palms are soaked."
Gaming's whispered words shatters the tense silence like a brick through glass. Xingqiu blinks owlishly, tearing his focus away from the window they're approaching — far too quickly might he add — to meet the other boy's concerned gaze. A sheepish grin tugs his lips as he registers the borderline painful grip he has on Gaming's hand, quickly loosening his hold with a half hearted laugh.
"My apologies, I'm just... a little nervous, is all," he admits, trying and failing to wave off his discomfort as he wipes his palms on his shorts. Taking one long breath, he resettles Gaming's hand more gently in his own.
Nervous... now there's the understatement of the century. Nervous hardly begins to cover the emotions bubbling in the pit of Xingqiu's stomach. More like he's one teeny-tiny misstep away from a full blown panic attack over more than just sneaking Gaming into his room.
Sure, he's no stranger to sneaking around behind his parents back. A minor fib here, a few conveniently omitted details about his whereabouts there... But smuggling another person — let alone the young man he's been not so secretly pining over for months now — into his heavily guarded estate? Even though Xingqiu considers himself a bit of a thrill seeker at heart, this level of inappropriate behavior goes far beyond his usual shenanigans.
An injured stray cat or mangey street dog is one thing — it's easy enough to coax one through an open window and release it back into the wilds once its minor injuries are tended to without anyone even knowing. But his dearest Gaming is no scrawny alley cat (despite popular belief). There's no easy way to hide someone inside a box or wardrobe cabinet were someone to burst into his room unannounced.
If they're caught in the act... Xingqiu doesn't even want to imagine the lecture he'd be subjected to.
"Xingqiu!"
"Huh?"
Xingqiu flinches as warm palms cup his face, the slightly roughened skin contrasting deliciously against his own feverish cheeks as Gaming tilts his chin up with a gentle yet insistent pressure.
"You're doing that lip biting thing again," Gaming's thumb drags slowly, almost reverently across Xingqiu's reddened bottom lip as he speaks. What's got you so worked up this time?"
The blatant affection in his words, coupled with the addictive feeling of Gaming's touch, proves to be Xingqiu's undoing. higher brain functions short-circuit into a useless pile of hormonal white noise, his heart jackrabbiting erratically against his ribcage as he struggles in vain not to swoon. As if such a thing were possible when pinned beneath the full intensity of Gaming's care.
(It was one thing before, back when Gaming was this untouchable, unattainable ideal. But now, faced with the dizzying reality of just how deeply the boy's feelings actually mirror his own...)
"A-ah! My apologies, I didn't even realize..." Jumbled protest tumble out of his mouth as Xingqiu pries Gaming's wandering touch away before he loses what little remains of his composure. As if he hasn't already made an embarrassment of himself already.
Taking a step backwards in a bid to put some much-needed distance between them, Xingqiu turns towards the open window, ignoring Gaming's concerned stare.
"Y-you can just climb in through here," he says, desperately trying to keep his voice steady. "The window's unlatched already, and I'm fairly certain the maids should all be finished with their evening duties by now."
Before Gaming has a chance to respond — or god forbid try start the conversation he's been trying so hard to avoid — he grips the windowsill and hoists himself up and over the ledge. Unfortunately, the combination of pitch darkness and his currently frazzled state leaves him a little less than graceful. His foot scuffs against the cobblestones mid hoist, throwing off his balance just enough for him to trip. He braces for the inevitable impact, eyes squeezing shut as he waits to hit the ground...
...Only for a pair of unfairly strong arms to wrap themselves around his waist before he has a chance to get close to the ground.
"Careful there! You almost..."
Whatever warnings Gaming attempts to give him are drowned out by the deafening rush of butterflies in his stomach. Because he's touching him, holding him, in a way that has Xingqiu biting back an especially pathetic whimper as his back is pressed flush against Gaming's chest.
Huh... Hasn't Xingqiu seen this exact scenario somewhere before? A passionate clinch between the two main characters under the pale moonlight, secreted away from prying eyes in the privacy of his bedroom, unchaperoned and free? And with Xingqiu wrapped in Gaming's loving embrace, isn't the position reminiscent of...
Xingqiu feels his face heat up.
(It had been a series he read on whim — the only romance series Xingqiu had read from cover to cover without growing too frustrated to continue by the third chapter or so. An admittedly melodramatic yet deliciously indulgent tale of a high society scandal between a plucky scion of a wealthy industrialist family and the dashing yet emotionally intelligent middle-class love interest. After a reckless declaration of love from the heroine she could never hope to back up, the love interest—)
"Here, let me give you a hand with this."
The solid grip around his midriff shifts lower, firm hands carefully gripping his hips to hoist him inside. Xingqiu's brain short circuits once again as he's lifted with embarrassing ease through the window. He stumbles a bit on the landing, head still swimming, but safely on solid ground inside his bedroom.
(—carries her in his arms and through the window of her room so the two can fuck like rabbits. Of course, he hadn't read that far, but now Xingqiu wishes that he had. Because dear gods above, that strength of his...)
Xingqiu has always found the smutty content of those books horribly off-putting in the past. Nothing more than cheap pandering designed to stoke the cravings of desperate housewives in need of stress relief. But his body is already responding so readily in response to just a simple touch. That means he wants Gaming too, right?
Gaming follows him through the window with far more grace than Xingqiu did, landing soundlessly on the wooden floor. Xingqiu is quick to latch the window shut behind them, as well as close the curtains. And, for good measure, he runs over to the door and locks that as well.
Now, with all entryways barred against potential interruption, it's just the two of them...
Alone.
Together.
Xingqiu watches as Gaming surveys the room, admiring the decor of his bedroom. It dawns on him that he forgot to tell him to take off his shoes.
"Woah... Your room is huge!" Gaming is already wandering over to inspect one of the overstuffed bookcases lining the walls, trailing fingers along the spines. "How many books do you even own? I don't think I've ever seen so many crammed in one place..."
"Mm. A rather extensive collection, as I'm sure you can imagine," Xingqiu replies with a shrug, toeing off his own shoes by the door. Just that one simple piece of clothing discarded — his socks are still on for crying out loud — and yet his heart sinks a bit.
"I don't know how you do it..." Gaming sighs as he plops himself down onto Xingqiu's bed, propping one ankle up on his knee as he settles in more fully. "Reading this much all the time, I mean. Doesn't it get exhausting after a while?"
Gaming leans back against the headboard as he smoothly shrugs off his outer layers — his hoodie — to get more comfortable. That sleeveless undershirt leaves little to the imagination, clinging to the toned contours of Gaming's biceps and forearms in a way that makes Xingqiu's mouth go dry. He would fantasize about those arms wrapped around him all the time, yet he wishes for nothing more than for him to put his hoodie back on. Just for comfort.
"Xingqiu?"
The sound of Gaming's voice brings Xingqiu crashing back down to reality.
"My apologies, what were you saying?"
"I was just wondering if you usually take a shower before bed, is all," Gaming clarifies with an easy grin, seemingly unbothered by Xingqiu's lack of focus.
"Oh? Um..."
He's never really been in a situation quite like this before, so how would he know his preference? None of the books he's read talked about a preference either, they just got right into the act. Wouldn't the most logical thing be to bathe afterward in order to wash away the grime?
The thought makes his skin crawl.
Xingqiu must have been thinking about it for a bit too long, because Gaming pats the bed beside him with an encouraging smile. "Why're you acting like I'll bite if you get too close? C'mere, get comfy."
Gaming's smile alone is capable of luring him out into the open, a siren's call that Xingqiu has never been able to ignore. He was standing by the door still, wasn't he? It was such a little thing, yet somehow his own inaction made him look so stupidly shy...
"After."
His feet move of their own accord, carrying him across the room to sink down on the mattress next to his beloved. Unable to meet Gaming's gaze for fear of what he might find reflected there, Xingqiu settles for staring over the other's shoulder instead.
"Is... that alright?"
"Uh, yeah? Why wouldn't it be?" Gaming asks as if it's the most obvious thing in the word. "It's your house, Xingqiu. You get to call the shots."
Calling the shots, huh? He can do that. This is his room, his home. So... that must mean he's meant to be the one to escalate things, doesn't it? That doesn't seem terribly out of line.
Xingqiu's palms feel clammy.
"Ah... Alright then."
Before Xingqiu has a chance to lose his nerve, he scoots a bit closer so that their thighs brush. He doesn't dare to move closer. The heat radiating off the other boy is so overwhelming. It's nothing like fantasies that used to torment him on those long, lonely nights.
The silence that stretches between them quickly becomes strained, bordering on awkward as the clock ticks. Part of Xingqiu longs to break the stillness, to say something — anything — to ease the tension. But his tongue sticks to the roof of his dry mouth, utterly useless. Gaming, ever unbothered by any social interaction, beats him to the punch once again.
"Sooooo... do you usually keep your outdoor clothes on when you sleep, or?" The teasing tone draws him back to the present. Gaming shifts to face him properly, dark eyes roaming over Xingqiu's face for... Something. "'Cus I usually don't. I'm guessing you don't either, right?"
"O-Oh! Right, of course not." Flustered, Xingqiu scrambles to his feet. He gestures vaguely towards the door to his walk in closet. "You can borrow something from my closet if you'd like. The dresser on the left is where I keep my nightclothes and such. Just... whatever you'd be most comfortable in."
A beat... then two... then three, until it becomes painfully apparent that Gaming isn't going to move a muscle. The other man merely watches him with a hard glare that somehow manages to pin Xingqiu in place more effectively than any physical restraint ever could.
"Did I do something wrong?"
"Huh?"
The sudden shift in topic is enough to startle Xingqiu into facing him directly. Xingqiu searches Gaming's expression for something, anything to tell him what could be bothering him, but comes up empty handed.
"You just..." Gaming waves a hand in the vague direction of Xingqiu, looking him up and down in the process. "...you're acting kind of weird."
The blunt observation strikes like a physical blow, knocking what little air remains in Xingqiu's lungs. Because he knows that already. He's achingly aware that he's making a fool of himself, tongue-tied and painfully awkward where any normal person would be at ease by now. Any normal person would be all over Gaming, taking him like some sort of ravenous animal instead of waiting for... For...
For what, exactly? What was he waiting for, when everything Xingqiu could possibly need is sitting right in front of him, a dream that can finally be made tangible with the simplest of efforts? This should be easy for him. He's dreamed of this exact scenario with Gaming for months, almost a year. What is he missing?
Why does he have to ruin the simplest things?
"I'm... I-I don't mean to be, it's just—"
"Xingqiu?"
Gaming's hands are warm — so very warm — as they carefully cup the sides of Xingqiu's face. The familiar weight is both comforting and disconcerting all at once. "Hey, hey... Breathe with me."
"I'm s-sorry—"
"Shhh, none of that." Gaming's voice is a low, soothing rumble as his fingers run through Xingqiu's hair with a feather-light touch. He leans in to press a kiss against his clammy forehead before tugging him into his lap. Xingqiu's legs bracket Gaming's hips as he settles over his thighs, and all he can think of is how natural the position feels.
(In the stories he reads, isn't this usually a precursor to sex? Is he finally getting to the good part?)
Gaming is still massaging his scalp in slow, tender movements. The combination of soothing touch and the reassuring weight of his presence slowly coaxes Xingqiu out of the worst of his fog, if only slightly.
(But Gaming only seems intent on comforting him, not anything more... Why? Isn't this what he came here for? Xingqiu is ruining his night.)
"That's it, you're okay. I've got you. Just breathe..."
He does after a while, and the steady in and out of it soothes the worst of Xingqiu's hysterics away, allowing his muscles to go slack and sink against Gaming's warm chest. He's still a bit too warm, but not unbearable, not yet. He could sleep like this.
"Better now?"
"Mm..."
Xingqiu blinks up at Gaming through heavy lidded eyes. He's utterly drained — both physically and mentally drained after panicking so much for so long. Now all that's left is the dull, hollow ache in his chest, which he's just going to ignore in favor of nuzzling into Gaming's chest a little more.
"I-I'm so sorry." Xingqiu hates how pathetic his voice sounds, like he's been crying for hours. He hadn't even shed a tear. "I... I don't even know what came over me."
It's not entirely a lie. He knows the root cause driving his reactions, but putting that vulnerability into words seems impossibly daunting.
Gaming huffs a quiet, not quite annoyed noise in response to his apology. With just as much care, he combs Xingqiu's bangs away from his eyes to be able to see him properly.
"You don't have to apologize for something like that. But it'd really help to know what brought it on in the first place so I can avoid it."It's the gentleness of Gaming's tone, coupled with the steady rhythm of his heart, that prompts Xingqiu to speak again.
"What are your expectations for what might happen tonight?"
It takes all the willpower Xingqiu has not to cringe at his own words. Gaming seems equally thrown off, judging from the way his body goes stiff beneath him.
"...What do you mean by that? I didn't have any."
Jaw clenched tight, Xingqiu forces himself to sit upright — still cradled in the protective circle of Gaming's arms but no longer clinging quite so fervently as he attempts to gather his scattered thoughts.
"What I mean by that is, if this were, well... If this were a scene in one of my romance novels then the next logical step would be—"
An unexpected snort of laughter cuts through Xingqiu's spiral of self-doubt, jarring him back to the present. He can only gape as Gaming's shoulders shake with barely restrained amusement, eyes crinkling at the corners in a way that has Xingqiu's mouth snapping shut with an audible click.
Before the sting of humiliation can truly set in, those strong arms are wrapping around Xingqiu's waist and tugging him forward until they're chest to chest once more. Gaming buries his face in the curve where his neck meets shoulder, warm puffs of laughter ghosting over his super heated skin as the other man fights to get his amusement under control.
"I should've known!" he manages at last, words vibrating through Xingqiu's bones with every chuckle. "You're literally the only person I know who would plan a hookup using shitty romance novels as a guidebook."
Xingqiu squirms indignantly in Gaming's lap, more out of principle than any real desire to escape his embrace just yet. He's sorely tempted to pout and allow the storm of embarrassed irritation to pass without acknowledging it.
"They're not—! Ugh..." he argues halfheartedly, unable to keep the petulant whine from his voice as he buries his burning face against Gaming's shoulder — if only to hide his burning cheeks. "You didn't exactly clarify your intentions when you confessed to me last week. Any sane person would come to the same conclusion."
The way Gaming's entire body tenses at that mumbled gripe gives Xingqiu pause. Sucks the residual irritation right out of his lungs as he hastily leans back just enough to properly search the other man's expression. The teasing glint has been replaced by something softer... more open and earnest in a way that makes Xingqiu's breath catch in his throat.
"Is that what this is all about?" The arms wrapped around his middle loosen their hold as Gaming's worry grows. "You thought that just because I said I liked you, I was... expecting you to put out or something?"
"No! Gods no, Ming, it's not like that at all!"
The denial comes out in a desperate rush, because how could he ever think such a thing? That's the furthest thing from Xingqiu's mind when it comes to this wonderful soul who has somehow seen fit to gift his heart to xingqiu of all people.
"I just thought..." Xingqiu's voice cracks as he gets it out, embarrassment making his cheeks somehow grow more red than they already were. "That's where these kinds of situations usually lead. If there is mutual attraction between both parties, natural progression of things is to—"
"You like me?"
The interjection throws Xingqiu for such a loop that he nearly chokes on his own spit. His heart beats erratically against his ribs, fluttering like a caged bird's begging to be let out. He doesn't need a mirror to know how badly his cheeks must be stained red by now.
"H-have I not been clear on that?" he asks, hating how accusatory the question comes out. "Of course I do..."
How could he not? This man is quite literally everything Xingqiu has ever dared dream of —headstrong and wild, impossibly beautiful inside and out in a way that constantly leaves him breathless. The fact that Gaming could even entertain a shred of doubt about the depths of Xingqiu's affections is mind boggling.
There's no mistaking the way Gaming's hands tighten around his waist, holding him in a way that might just be a little too tight. Then, so suddenly that Xingqiu barely has time to process the shift, the world tilts violently on its axis and he's weightless. Before he can so much as voice his surprise, his back hits the rumpled sheets of his bed with a whump. Gaming's weight brackets him in from above, caging Xingqiu in with nowhere to run — not that he'd want to flee even if he could.
When those calloused palms skim over the exposed sliver of skin exposed by his rucked up shirt, it's in a way that makes Xingqiu go completely lax. It's like every cell in his body has been waiting for the other boy's touch. Warm and gentle and, finally, oh so right.
The smile on Gaming's is impossibly soft. His dark eyes are hooded, pupils blown so wide the warm brown iris is almost entirely swallowed by black as he drinks in the sight of Xingqiu splayed out beneath him. He's laughing again, a breathy little chuckle that does unspeakable things to Xingqiu's heart, before their positions are shifting once more in a single dizzying movement.
This time, when everything stills, they end up on their sides facing each other — legs tangled together in a way that should feel restrictive yet somehow doesn't. Xingqiu barely has a chance to mourn the temporary loss of those addictive touches ghosting over his skin before their hands find each other seemingly of their own accord. Fingers lacing together in a way that feels right in a bone deep way he can't put words to.
"Just to clear the air, I don't actually expect anything from you." Gaming mumbles, bringing Xingqiu's hands up to press a kiss against his knuckles. "I'd be lying if I said I never thought about that kind of stuff with you, because I have. More than I'm really proud of, if I'm being honest. But that doesn't mean I would ever try to pressure you into doing something you don't want. Not now, not ever."
The sincerity, the sweetness of it all, the way Gaming so effortlessly coaxes him back out of his head to ground him once more, it's enough to make his heart ache. He never stood a chance from the start.
"I feel the same way," Xingqiu says after a moment of hesitation. "About you, I mean. In... in every way you're implying."
There's something freeing about saying it out loud, to finally admit to the thing that he's been dancing around for weeks — no, months! — is such an intense relief.
Xingqiu brings one hand up to cup Gaming's jaw, marveling at how the other man instinctively leans into the touch. He nuzzles his cheek against Xingqiu's palm with a soft hum of contentment as those gorgeous eyes slip closed in unguarded trust.
"You mean the world to me, my dear. If you'll permit me, I would love nothing more than to cherish you in every way you deserve from this day forward."
It's so much easier to bare his heart like this now that the shroud of ambiguity has been lifted. Gaming keeps his eyes closed, allowing Xingqiu to touch him like he is the most precious thing in the world.
"How does that sound?" Xingqiu whispers in the tiny space between them. "I'm afraid you'll have to deal with the consequences of dating me if you agree. I tend to stir up trouble when I'm in need of entertainment, as I'm quite sure you're already aware..."
Gaming snorts. Even though his eyes remain, Xingqiu can tell he rolled them.
"If those pranks were supposed to be your attempts at flirting, then yeah. I'm very much aware, princess."
"Princess!?" Xingqiu yanks his hand away from where it had still been cradling his beloved's jaw in favor of giving the insufferable man's arm a hard pinch. "I'll have you know that—"
"What?" The wounded look Gaming gives him is almost convincing if it weren't for the glee radiating off of him in waves. "You're a rich, spoiled, born and bred primadonna. I think you fit the bill rather nicely."
"I take back everything I just said," Xingqiu huffs out, fighting back a grin. "Consider our previous agreement null and void, you cad."
"You can't do that! We're in the land of contracts, you can't break one!"
Despite his best efforts, the little half smile on Gaming's mouth betrays his amusement. Xingqiu's heart shudders in his chest, flooded with endearment for this absurd man, this boy that Xingqiu adores with everything he has to give and even more.
"I don't think I've ever been this happy before..." His beloved says, leaning forward until their foreheads are pressed together. "Don't tell Man Chai, though. He'll throw a massive fit over it."
A startled laugh punches its way out of Xingqiu at the thought. Oh, if Man Chai could fully understand him, he would SO brag about him being the favorite. Gaming likes him more, this is a proven fact. "Your secret's safe with me..."
"Hey, Xingqiu?"
He doesn't need to respond, not when Gaming is already shifting impossibly closer. Xingqiu can feel the other's warm breath ghosting over his lips as he speaks.
"Boyfriends?"
That single word makes Xingqiu's breath hitch in his throat. He never thought that word could make him so giddy, and yet it does. His fingers tighten around Gaming's grip as his grin widens into something toothy and a side of unhinged.
"boyfriends."
The only warning he receives before Gaming is closing the distance between them is a tiny huffed laugh, and then his lips are on his. A little hesitant at first but oh so warm. It's everything Xingqiu could ever have hoped for and more.