Work Text:
Early September, 2010
"You sure about this?"
Tess glances over to him, irritated for a moment.
He's been by the apartment after work, in clean clothes and his hair is slicked back in glossy waves. She can still smell the soap on his skin and the faintly minty oil in his hair, and briefly, before she can rein her mind in, she wonders what aftershave he used to wear, and thinks about how good he must have smelled. The worry on his face pulls her up, and she softens her reply, sighing a little. "Yeah, I'm sure. He just seems so... sincere."
The line at the checkpoint shuffles forward, and she rubs her hand over the back of her neck. She's sweaty and gritty and smells like fish and blood from her shift at the cannery, and she just wants to go home, but there's shit they need to take care of. Besides, they're meeting up with Tommy for food that he says he's buying, and who passes up a free meal, right? Sweat trickles into the small of her back and she pulls at the front of her shirt, fanning herself with it. The air is close and heavy.
"We're gonna check the place out first, make sure it's what he says it is. If it's off, if either one of us sees something we don't like, or we get a bad feeling, or anything? We bail. We come back here and I never contact him again and we just get on with our lives. Okay?"
He doesn't look very happy about it, but the creases ease from his forehead a little and he nods. "Yeah. Alright."
They quiet down as they get to the front of the line, and no matter how many times she goes through one, the checkpoints always make her edgy, and it's worse when she's exhausted, nerves already frayed. Things have been calm lately, but it's September now, and the end of the month is looming, and everyone's thinking about it. It's starting to settle over the city like a sickness. Nerves will fray, and no patience will be had from FEDRA. People will hang for the slightest offense, and the black mood will linger well in the autumn, making their work more dangerous than usual.
They either go now, or wait months and risk the weather turning on them.
When they're through and away from the barrier between zones, Tess says, "Look, I know it's a risk. If you think it's too much, we won't go."
He shoots her a startled look, and runs a hand over his hair, smoothing it back in place, then scratches at his patchy beard. "Nah, we should go. If it works out, well, that's a pretty fucking good resource to have."
"If it's real," she mutters, because for all she knows she's been played, and at best they're heading out on a wild goose chase, and at worst they'll be dead in whatever trap it is.
At least if they're dead she won't have to hear him say I told you so.
The street is crowded when they get close to the Statue Market, and Joel steps in front of her, clearing the way. It's noisy, thick with people trying to get their shopping done before the FEDRA-supplied kiosks are sold out, and they should have just gone around instead of taking the straightest path to Helen's, but they're in the thick of it now and Tess's skin crawls with the closeness of the crowd. The voices around her blur into a din that feels like a tangible, physical pressure and she clenches her jaw against the urge to scream.
Tess hooks her fingers around the back of his belt, and lets him lead her through to the other side, leaving the throng where Hanover Street crosses Hanover Avenue, and the narrow alleyway is blissfully quiet. The passage is roofed over with makeshift bridges from one building to another, and it's cool in the deep shade. A light breeze winds through the passage, hinting of rain and a break from the heat.
Joel's pace slows, and she steps beside him, leaving her hand on his back.
"We should take some extra firepower in case it's not real, but there's still something there worth taking."
He nods, always agreeable to violence. "We need to look for a place to get the truck across the Charles, just in case. That construction shit is only good if we can get it to people."
The alley that Helen's place is on is narrower still, and Tess can nearly touch each side of the passage with her fingertips as they move between the brick buildings. It opens onto a courtyard filled with engines and tools, tires and scrap metal. A few motorcycles and scooters lean against one wall, each in various states of usability. A gated parking space holds even more, and a few skinny kids are hanging about, chatting with an enormous blond guy who's sprawling in a lawn chair next to the gate.
Jakub, she thinks. Or maybe Kalju. Fuck, she can't tell the twins apart. She breezes past him toward the door.
"Hey!" Jakub or Kalju says, pushing himself to his feet, puffing up his chest.
"Hey, what?" Tess calls back, laying a hand on Joel's arm to keep him from escalating things.
"Oh, Tess. Yes, hallo. And your man. Hallo, man."
The kids scatter with backward glances in her direction, and she steps over to Kalju, taking his offered cigarette. She's pretty sure it's Kalju. Joel shakes his head at the offer, and crosses his arms over his chest.
"Is it still there?" Tess asks, wincing and coughing at the acrid, musty taste of the smoke that sets her entire chest smoldering. What the fuck even is this? She waves a hand in front of her face to clear the air.
"Yes, I think. Anyway, it was last time I was there. But you'll never get it."
"Fuck you, I'll never get it."
"Right under their noses? No, you'll get caught, and that's the last we see of Tess until they hang you."
She scoffs at him, and Joel squints at her. "What's this?" he asks warily.
"A ship for pirate queen!" Kalju laughs.
"Oh, for fuck's sake," Joel mutters, turning away in disgust.
Kalju just laughs harder, leaning over and bracing his big hands on his thighs. "Does your greased up weasel not like boat?"
Joel's head snaps back to the Estonian. "Greased up... Fuck you, Jakub."
Shit.
Jakub points at her. "If you get boat, pirate queen, you take me sailing. A cruise for Jakub. Sail me home across ocean."
There's a wistful note to his voice that claws at her, and she flips him off as they head into the building and up the narrow stairs. She can hear the music before they even reach the third floor, and by the time they're at the propped open door, Pink Floyd is wailing about dying.
Tess weaves her way through the dark apartment, stepping over people sprawled out on cushions on the floor as she goes. The smell of weed is thick in the air, and under that the stench of sweat and sickness. Tess stalks through the kitchen and ducks into the hole that's been knocked between the buildings, bouncing to the beat as Money ratchets its way out of the speakers. She grins a little to herself, and nods to the group playing cards at the table in the second kitchen, and heads deeper into the building, taking the stairs up another level.
Helen's door is propped open, too, but the party doesn't seem to have migrated this far into the building yet. A tall man is sprawled on the couch, arm flung over his dark face as he snores lightly. Joel precedes her, hands on his hips as he peers around the dim room.
Tess closes the door behind them with a bang.
Helen shoots out of the bedroom, then skids to a halt as Sidiki bolts upright with what can only be a curse on his lips in a language Tess doesn't know.
"Oh, well, fuck you Tess, make yourself at home," Helen says.
Sidiki slumps back and yawns before fumbling around for a joint and a lighter.
"I don't want any fucking company."
Helen waves a dismissive hand. "They know to stay the fuck out of here. You got my boots?"
Joel's already pulling the pair out of his pack, glossy and nearly new. He hands them over and Helen grins.
"Fuck yeah! Damn, Tess, these are amazing." She turns to her sometimes-boyfriend, who seems to only be half-conscious. "Check this shit out!"
He nods and yawns again. "Brilliant," he mutters, taking a deep drag.
Helen lifts a blanket from the floor to reveal a trash bag, and hefts the bag to her shoulder. She staggers like the bag's right at the limit of what she can lift, then slings it in Tess's direction.
Tess braces, then stumbles forward when the bag hits her and offers nothing to slow her momentum. It's light as a feather.
"What the fuck?"
Helen laughs. "Oh my god, that was great. You should have seen your face. Did you see that, Sid?"
He blinks and sprawls back on the couch. "Sure did, babe."
Tess shakes the bag and it rustles, the contents shifting inside. "What the fuck is this?"
"It's perlite. That's what you wanted, right?"
"Well, yeah." She frowns. She'd bluffed her way through that part of the conversation with the man on the radio. "What the fuck is it, though?"
"They put it in with the dirt at the greenhouse. Makes it looser, I guess? Sid says they have shittons of it, so he didn't have any trouble getting it."
Tess pulls the bag open and runs her fingers through the fluffy white contents. It clings to her sweaty fingers.
"The white shit in potting soil? That's perlite? I thought that was Styrofoam."
Helen gives her a confused look and asks, "Why the fuck would someone put Styrofoam in potting soil?"
Tess glares and hands the bag to Joel. "Whatever." She flicks her eyes to Sidiki and asks, "You have any trouble getting it?"
"Nope." He's looking more alert now, and he runs a hand over his short, dark hair. "They guard the fertilizer and seeds really well, but this shit is just laying around. Oh!"
He pushes himself up and rummages through a pile of stuff on the table. The gloves he hands her are stiff, new leather and are still held together with a little plastic tag like they just came off the shelf.
"Got these before anyone could mark them, so they don't even look stolen. Those boots are worth more than a bag of that white shit."
She turns them in her hands. Too big for her, but perfect for Joel. His eyes linger on hers when she gives them to him.
"Thanks, Sid."
He gives her a dazzling grin, and wanders into the adjoining room. "No problem. Gotta keep the ladies happy."
Tess laughs.
"Tell 'em your news babe," Sid calls from the kitchen.
"Oh no," Tess says.
Helen frowns. "What?"
"Your news is always fucking terrible, Helen," Joel says flatly.
"It's not my fault! That's the only kind there is."
"What is your fucking news," Tess asks, bracing herself for whatever bullshit is about to land.
"FEDRA's starting some coal mines and they're asking for volunteers for the next work rotation."
"Fucking what?" Tess darts a glance at Joel, meeting his eyes as he shakes his head.
"Where the fuck are they putting coal mines," he asks.
"Somewhere in Pennsylvania, I guess. I dunno where, but the work shifts are four months long and pay triple what anything here pays."
"You can't be thinking about it," Tess says. "It's a death sentence."
"Triple pay for four months?" Helen raises her eyebrows and shrugs. "That's tempting."
"No it isn't," Sidiki says. "She's not going."
Helen shrugs again and says, "We'll see."
Tess shakes her head and points at Helen. "We're gonna be scarce for a while. Don't wreck the place while we're gone."
"No parties, mom, I promise."
They take a different route away from Helen's apartment, bypassing the first building altogether. The basement is dripping from the walls and ceiling, water pooling on the uneven floor. It gives her the creeps, but they've never seen any sign of the fungus that so loves the dark and damp. They move slowly though, being as quiet as possible as they slip into a tunnel of crumbling brick and worn stone.
She's more worried about the FEDRA installation above them than the infected. This tunnel runs right under the closed off zone between Two and Five where the goods from the docks are stored. Warehouses of food and clothing and medicine and heavily armed guards lie just above their heads.
If she could find a way up there...
Well, she'd probably get killed immediately, but it's a fun daydream.
They weave their way in silence under the wall to Five, and up to a cache of theirs in the ruined first floor of a dry cleaners, then surface to a cool wind that feels like heaven. It's only been an hour or so, but it feels like a different day entirely. Tess breathes in the fresh air gratefully.
"Weather's turnin'" Joel mutters. "Bet it's gonna storm."
She squints up at what she can see of the sky between the buildings. It's just starting to get overcast, gray clouds shrouding the blue of the late summer sky. "Think it'll be bad?"
He shrugs. "We can trust Helen's man?"
"Yeah," she says, leading the way back toward Hanover Street. "He's reliable, got no love for FEDRA after what happened to his sister."
Joel nods, not asking for details. It's easy enough to imagine.
They queue up again at a checkpoint out of Five, and Tess thinks this is what will catch them out someday - leaving a Zone they never officially entered. If FEDRA had a fast, reliable communication network, she and Joel would be dead ten times over.
One of the guards tries to catch Joel's eye, a customer of his, but the subtle shake of his head warns the guy off.
She frowns, wondering what the guy's poison is, because they're well stocked on pretty much everything, Lin coming through on a shipment for them. There's little they can't easily provide right now. This guy is one of Joel's from before they started working together, and she doesn't recognize him.
She waits until the crowd envelops them again before she pulls his head close to hers.
"What..."
"Porn," he says, and she frowns.
"Titty mags, DVDs, whatever. He'll even take VHS tapes. Apparently FEDRA's current library is getting a bit... stale."
She stops in the middle of the street and stares at him. "Are you fucking with me?"
"Nope, you've missed an entire, untapped market."
He's smirking at her, amused, and she presses her lips together to hold back a laugh.
"Well, shit," she says.
"'Well, shit' what?" Tommy asks, clapping his hand onto Joel's shoulder and grinning at Tess.
He's managed to clean up too, and Tess feels like a grubby goblin next to the two brothers.
"Come on," Tommy says, "that place over on Prince Street's got crabs tonight, and not the kind my brother's got, Tess, you really gotta be careful with him."
"Fuck's sake," Joel mutters as they follow Tommy through the streets.
"What've you guys been up to?" he asks once they're settled at a table outside the shop, a big plate of ocean delights and dubious sea creatures between them.
"Nothin'."
Nothing."
She and Joel glance at each other, a tiny smile tugging at their lips. Tess picks up something that looks like a tiny octopus and pops it in her mouth. She gathers up the few mussels on the plate and pulls them close to Joel so his favorites are easy for him to reach.
Tommy frowns. "There's plenty of work here, I dunno know why you've gotta go lookin' for trouble all the time."
Tess rolls her eyes.
"You're one to talk."
"I told you, I'm done with that shit. I ain't messing around with..."
He glances around, looking as suspicious as possible before he leans forward, hunched over the table. Tess frowns. Subtlety is lost on the younger Miller.
"Them. I ain't doing that anymore."
She opens her mouth to call bullshit, but Joel kicks her under the table.
She likes Tommy, she really does, but she doesn't trust him and their bickering grates on Joel's nerves.
She flaps her hand in the air. "Yeah, yeah, I know."
They fall into a cranky silence before Joel asks, "Your new place workin' out?"
"Yeah." Tommy rolls his shoulders, shrugging off any lingering irritation. "Yeah, it's good. Better than your fuckin' couch, that's for damn sure."
"Good," Joel says. "That's good. You wanna stop by our place and check on it for the next little while?"
Tommy frowns. "Check on it for what?"
She and Joel share a look. She doesn't like giving much away, but she will feel a lot better if she's not worrying too much about the security of their apartment while they're gone. Leaving things unattended too long is just an invitation for opportunistic thieves.
"We're going to be gone for a bit," Tess says.
"Gone where? You goin' on a vacation?"
The laughter dies on his lips as he puts it together, then he spits, "Oh, what the fuck? Are you serious?"
She doesn't answer that, just holds his gaze until he looks away.
"We got some business to take care of," Joel says.
"You're fuckin'..."
He hunches forward again and glances around again. "You're going out?" he hisses, louder than necessary.
Tess tensions her finger against her thumb and flicks it against the center of his forehead, startling him back. "Could you be less obvious, please? Yes, we need to be away from home for a bit, can you not broadcast it to every dickweed within earshot? Talk normal, and stop leaning toward us like that. Jesus fucking Christ."
He rubs his head. "Ow, dammit, Tess."
"She's got a point," Joel says.
"It's just... it ain't safe."
"I'm aware," Tess says. The first fat raindrops plop onto the surface of the table.
"If you get caught..."
"I'm aware Tommy."
He works his jaw and stares down at the table. She's very familiar with his views on this, having hashed it out in multiple pointless arguments since he popped back into Joel's life a few months ago. It's a point of contention between the brothers, and Tess thinks it's more than a little hypocritical given what the Fireflies get up to and there's not a doubt in her mind that Tommy's still a fucking Firefly despite all his protests.
She'd worried when he came back, that Joel would take his side and leave her hanging, but while he was relieved and happy to have Tommy back in his life, he hadn't changed a bit when it came to her and their business. She didn't get it - his protectiveness of Tommy was legendary - and she didn't work out what was different until one day when Joel was pummeling some guy for looking at her the wrong way when it clicked.
It's different because of her. Joel has room in his orbit for exactly one person, and he'd chosen her over Tommy. She'd shuddered with delight and fucked him on the floor just inside the apartment that night.
"I've got this under control," she says with a finality that even Tommy can't push past. He shoots Joel a pleading look but only gets a shrug in return.
The wind whips through the street, scattering trash and splattering her face with fitful rain. The cold wind is heavenly.
"Alright, okay, fine." He holds up his hands in surrender. "I'll go by every night, okay?"
"Thanks," Joel says, nodding and sweeping up his backpack as he stands.
"We'll catch up with you when we're done." Tess pats his cheek. "Don't worry. We'll be fine."
He sighs and starts to say something else when a slight redheaded woman slips under his arm and says, "There you are!"
Tess raises an eyebrow.
"Hey, Mia." Tommy kisses her soundly.
"Who's this?" she asks brightly, turning her pale blue eyes toward them.
"My brother Joel and his... his... uh..."
He looks to Joel for an assist, but Joel stays silent. When Tommy turns his eyes to her, Tess just shrugs.
"Tess. This is Tess. Guys, this is Mia."
Thunder cracks overhead and Joel says, "Ma'am."
Tess gives the two of them an appraising look and asks, "You got condoms, Tommy?"
"What? Yes, I got... Jesus Christ."
Joel rubs a hand over his mouth to stifle a laugh.
"Just checking."
The rain is pelting against the windows by the time they're safely inside the apartment, and Tess leans her head against the cool glass, watching the flooding street below. It's dark, and it's coming down in fucking buckets, being lashed by wind that's bitingly cold, a promise of the season to come. A grumbling peal of thunder rattles the window seconds after the sky strobes painfully bright.
She sighs. They've got sales to make, work to do before they're gone for who knows how long. The latest shipment from Lin is safe for now, but nothing is truly safe and if it's stolen out from under them they'll be cold and hungry this winter, scraping by like everyone else in this crapsack town. She can't count on another big delivery before spring, and she has to plan well enough to make this one last.
The thought of going out into the storm after working all day makes her want to cry. She's tired, so tired, and she's sore and cold and she doesn't want to move. She thumps her head carefully against the glass.
The floorboards creak, and Joel steps close to look out the window. He's standing right behind her, not quite touching her but close enough that she can feel the warmth of his body, smell wet hair and clean skin. His voice is a low rumble.
"Looks like shit out there."
She hums in agreement. She does not want to go out. They need to go out. She leans back against him.
The touch of his calloused fingers on her neck is so light it raises the hairs on her skin. He sweeps her hair to the side, and nuzzles her ear. His lips brush her skin when he says, "We're staying home." His hands drop to her hips and his fingers knead into her gently.
She closes her eyes and tilts her head back. "Are we?"
"Mmmhmm, we are." He kisses her earlobe. One hand slips around her waist, pulling her back into him, and she has no desire to argue the point. She starts to turn, but his arms tighten on her, and he growls softly, nipping at her ear. "We're staying home, and you're gonna let me take care of you tonight, Tess."
Her breath catches, and a soft moan slips from her mouth. His hand splays against her stomach, fingers moving lightly over the fabric of her shirt. His lips are against her neck, just below her ear, stubble prickling against her skin.
"Can you do that for me, Tessa? Let go for me tonight?"
Her eyes fall shut and she pushes back into the solid warmth of his body. The wanting in his voice curls through her, squeezing the air from her lungs, pulsing in time with the rush of her blood. He's patient, waiting for her to decide, to relax into his desire. His breath warms her skin.
She nods, then exhales slowly. "Yeah."
His low laugh vibrates against her skin and skitters along her nerves. He kisses her neck, wet and open. "Good girl."
A bolt of pleasure lances through her, a frisson so intense she gasps. She squeezes her eyes shut tight and her cheeks flush hotly, arousal and embarrassment both.
His arms wrap around her, enveloping her. She curls her hands over his arms. She takes one of his hands in hers and she tries to wrest a little control back.
"You like taking care of me."
It's not really a question, but he nods against her neck and says, "Fuckin' love it."
She tries again to turn in his arms, but there's no space between them, no room for her to move, and he's strong. So fucking strong. He licks a hot stripe up her neck, then blows, cooling her skin. She flinches, ticklish, as his fingers slip under her shirt, brushing her stomach, tracing the scar there.
Tess lifts his hand to her mouth and kisses his knuckles, mouthing each one in turn before moving onto his fingers. The pads of his fingers are rough against her lips, calloused from hard years of work and survival. His mouth is at the crook of her neck, sucking delicately at her skin.
She shifts against him, pushing one shoulder back into his, stepping back into him, trying to slip in his grasp, to wiggle around to face him, but he's unyielding. She can feel him pressing into her through their jeans, half-hard against her ass.
She sucks the tip of one of his fingers into her mouth. His teeth graze her neck, resting against her skin, the ghost of a bite and she tilts her head to the side with a moan, welcoming more. He smiles against her skin and murmurs, "Good girl."
She lets go then. She relaxes fully against him, the tension melting away from her body. She stops trying to twist in his arms. She stops thinking about the sales, and the path they'll take under the walls, and the trap they're walking into, and the way they'll be killed if they're caught. She lets her head fall back against his shoulder and just stops.
The sound he makes is low and primal.
He turns her in his arms and frames her face with his hands, thumbs brushing over her cheeks.
"You're such a good girl, Tess. You take such good care of me."
His lips brush her forehead.
"So smart." Kiss. "So fuckin' smart." Kiss. "You work so hard." His lips ghost along her nose and his hands slip back to tangle in her hair. She sways in his hold and blinks her eyes open. Her chest is so tight she feels light headed.
His gaze is dark and hungry, the brown of his eyes barely showing around the inky black of his blown pupils. He's so close it's all she can see and she drowns willingly in those dark pools. His lips touch hers and he murmurs into her mouth, "So beautiful."
She parts her lips for him, inviting him in, and the depth of the kiss leaves her breathless. She curls her fingers into his shirt, pulling him closer, anchoring herself to him. She goes willingly when he turns her, walks her backward, never breaking the kiss. They miss the door to the bathroom and bump into the wall, giggling breathlessly before he redirects them into the small room.
He runs the water as he undresses her, and she wants to protest. She's cold and she doesn't want a cold shower but she's disgusting and washing the grim off her skin is not something she's willing to skip. She's naked and moaning at every soft touch of his fingers when she finally notices the heavy, hot steam settling on her skin.
She looks at the spray blankly before turning her face up to his, staring in wonder at his soft smile.
"You fixed it."
He nods.
"You... you fucking fixed it!"
Tess slings her arms around his neck and presses her face to his skin, overwhelmed. He gathers her up and says, "It wasn't much trouble once I got the parts for it."
She doesn't say anything to that. There's nothing she can say that wouldn't cross the lines they've drawn around themselves and their relationship, and her throat is too tight for words anyway.
He ushers her in and turns her under the spray, and the warmth against her skin is otherworldly, a forgotten delight. His hands travel over her body, dragging a soapy cloth behind, and she wants to stop him from using so much soap, so much shampoo, but she stands in the shower and lets him wash her, lets the tears disappear in the water.
He caresses her long after she's clean, kneading her hips, her breasts. He strokes his fingers along her spine, over her shoulders. She's undone by his tenderness, by the way his big, rough hands are so delicate on her skin, so strong when they dig into her muscles. She moans helplessly when his thumbs dig into a particularly sore knot, pressing hard until the pain of it blurs and dissipates. She's boneless and flushed with arousal when he shuts off the water and dries her gently.
He stands behind her at the sink, crowding against her. His hands splay over her stomach and chest, stroking her skin. He's hard and hot against her back, rubbing lazily against her.
"You're so fucking beautiful, Tess."
She laughs breathlessly and rocks up onto her toes, humming in delight as he slips between her legs. He groans and thrusts forward, the head of his cock sliding against her folds. His hand moves down to find her clit and her eyes slam shut as he matches the movement of his fingers to his thrusts, and she braces her hands on the sink to keep herself upright.
"Open your eyes," he says.
She whimpers. She's mesmerized by the sight of them in the mirror, of him looming behind her, dark eyed and hungry. The drag of him against where she's swollen and aching is exquisite, and each thrust gives her a glimpse of the tip his cock, glossy and wet. He crosses one arm over her chest, holding her close to him, so close she swears his heart is beating in her chest.
She shakes as pleasure spirals out from her core, drawn into long waves by his touch. The only thing keeping her upright is his arm. When she comes back to herself, panting, he smirks at her reflection and licks his fingers clean.
He's still hot and hard between her legs. He gives a lazy thrust and says, "Ain't finished with you just yet, darlin'"
"So where is this place?"
Tess glances over to him before returning her gaze to the truck of FEDRA soldiers who are taking an extended break at an intersection just across the river. She doesn't even know what the fuck they're doing across the river - they usually don't bother getting this far away from the QZ. She's mentally rearranging their schedule because of the delay these dumb fuckers are causing.
"Lincoln," she says distractedly.
"Where the fuck is that?"
"Past I-95."
He frowns, and leans forward slightly when it looks like the soldiers might be moving on, but then mutters something under his breath and leans back.
"Which one's that?"
"Yankee Division."
His entire face scrunches up in annoyance. "The fuck kind of name is that?"
"I don't fucking know, I didn't name it."
There's a burst of laughter from the guards and they both reflexively duck at the sound, his arm shooting out in front of her.
"They're just dicking around over there," she hisses. "Ducking their patrol duties."
"Imagine FERDA soldiers being shit at their jobs."
She glares at him.
He gives her a bland look, apparently unbothered by the delay. "Is that the one that circles all the way around?"
"Yeah, but the one closer in, not I-495."
"What's that one called?"
"Uh..."
She thinks, picturing the map in her mind. They've got no real reason to be that far away from the QZ, so it's not a priority in what she has memorized.
"Blue something. Blue Star."
He nods. "Much better name."
"Oh, I'm glad you approve. What are these dicks even doing?"
"There's another one that circles around, right?"
"Mmm," she affirms. "Only kind of south east, not the whole way around. I know what you're doing."
"What am I doing?"
"You're trying to distract me so I don't suggest we just kill these guys."
"Is it working?"
She shoots him a sidelong glance, then brings her eyes back to the soldiers who are finally moving on. They wait until the sound of the engine has faded, then give it a bit longer, just to be safe, but not too long because she wants to be across the river before the sun's fully up.
Joel slips from their hiding place, landing softly as he jumps. He turns and reaches up for her pack, and she smiles at the heft of it.
The backpack frame had taken some serious legwork to find, and even more to make the trade, but it's worth every bit of it in her not so humble opinion. It's massive. It's easily able to hold all their trades, food, and even a little tent that she can't really imagine bothering to set up, but she's so pleased with it she's carrying it anyway. It lets Joel carry something small and light, just holding emergency supplies so he's mobile if they're attacked. If something gets close enough to them to fight hand to hand, he's better suited to it than she is.
He leans the pack against his leg and holds a hand up to help her down.
She pauses, crouching on the edge of the ruined concrete.
"You know Tommy's still..."
"Yes, I fuckin' know."
"That's gonna get him killed. Fuck, Joel, it's gonna get us killed."
"I... yeah, fuck I know, I don't know what the fuck is wrong with him."
Tess sighs and takes his hand, letting him catch her when she jumps. She leans into him and he kisses the top of her head.
They cross the Charles and head west in silence.
The railroad takes them nearly to Belmont, where the tracks are blocked by a derailment and a thick swarm of infected. They've spread further east than the last time she and Joel were out this far, the fungal vines snaking along the tracks, shortening the available route by nearly a half mile. Tess hisses in annoyance, and leads them through tightly packed suburban neighborhoods that make her skin crawl.
It's slow. The day is overcast, and they're extra wary of stray infected that might be taking advantage of the cloud cover. They're both jumpy and irritable when Tess takes them off the road, through a line of trees and into neatly spaced, overgrown fields.
Joel squints and looks around. "The fuck," he whispers.
She flashes him a grin, and gestures with her head. Come on.
The fields are still sporting a few crops that have persevered through the years, but it's mostly tall grass and spindly weeds. The gravel paths between the small fields are still reasonably clear, and when they're on one of those, Joel pulls her to a stop.
"What is this place?"
"UMass College of Agriculture," she says, "but that's not even the best part."
"Huh," he says. "Tess, wait up."
They cross a final field to the riot of small garden plots growing wild, spilling out of their once-neat squares.
"This is the best part," she says, plucking a small tomato from a vine and popping it in her mouth. The skin bursts under her teeth, and the tart juice spilling over her lips.
He shakes his head, looking around in amazement. "How did you even know about this place?"
"The radio guy told me about it. He thinks I don't trust him, so he gave me something good on the way to where he is. You know, show of good faith, right?"
"You don't trust him." He holds a tomato up, marvling at it, before he bites it in half. "Do you?"
She pushes aside vines and pulls out a green bean, biting it in half. It's a little woody, well past ideal ripeness, but she crunches it with delight anyway.
"I don't trust anyone."
"Funny."
She points at a shed and says, "That's supposed to be clear. We can take a break there."
The door to the shed is padlocked shut, so they sit in the thick grass at the side of it. They can open it later, when they have more time and aren't worried about making a racket. Better to leave it secure if they can't give it their full attention.
"Even if this doesn't work out with the guy, this is a good resource. We can find tools here, probably seeds, too, and I mean, shit, look at all the food. I didn't know so much stuff would just keep growing on its own, but I guess that's what plants do."
He's taking bites out of some kind of summer squash, the mottled green skin giving way to his teeth. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and says, "So we're following this guy's directions?"
"Not entirely. We're not taking the road he recommended past here. There's a lake north of here, and he says there's a bridge across it and the road is clear. It runs right to his town. We're gonna swing south and scope the place out from a different side first."
"So, he's in a town? How many people?"
"He's been cagey about it, you know. I mean, I have too. I keep saying 'my group' and 'my people' like I've got an army and not just a single Texan.
"Hey. I'm an army."
She grins and gives him a sidelong smirk. "You sure are, Tex. But 'town' kind of implies multiple people. Many people. I guess we'll see when we get there."
She stretches her legs and kicks her heels against the ground.
"He says one of the guys there, the leader I guess, is pretty paranoid. He says there will probably be threats, but it'll be bluffing. Mostly bluffing."
That doesn't sit well, and he says, "I'm not gonna let someone threaten you."
"It's just gonna be talk. It's their place, right? It's no different than what we do in the QZ, make sure people know when they're on our turf. It's just gonna be posturing, so don't get all..." She waves a hand in the air. "You know."
"Violent?"
"Yes, that."
He leans close and brushes his lips against the shell of her ear. "You like it when I'm violent."
She shivers and pushes his face away. "Do not start that shit. We're on a schedule here."
His laugh is low and amused.
The route she picks is surprisingly wooded, the trees growing close on either side of the road. The houses are set further apart here, big structures set well back from the road. It's all very rural and affluent, and it must have been a nice place before. A few of the big houses are clearly infested, but nothing is out in the open. It's late morning when they round a curve in the road, and she can see a fence in the distance.
She stops him with a hand on his wrist, then leaves the road, picking her way carefully to a group of bushy trees that give them a little cover. Joel's squinting through the scope of his rifle.
"Well?"
"That's a fence, I reckon."
"Cute. Do you see anyone?"
"No. I see some electrical connections to the fence, so don't pee on it."
"Noted." She chews on the side of her thumb, casting her gaze around. She can see tree stumps up ahead in a clearing, and several houses that are more ruined than ones farther away, pulled down to clear the line of sight from the town, she supposes.
"Now what, boss?"
"Let's see if we can find somewhere we can get closer without being seen. We need to circle around this place and see what's what."
They catch glimpses of the place as they navigate around the fence, staying in cover as best they can. It's a city block or so surrounding an intersection, although the roads run at odd angles and the shape isn't square. Within the fence are a handful of houses and other buildings, even a picture book church with a steeple pointing to the sky. There's the gate at the front, just like Frank said there would be, and it's all very much like he described, just apparently deserted. They see no one in the hours they spend watching from a careful distance, no one moving within the fence, no one patrolling outside it. It's completely still save for the low grumble of a generator, and flags flapping listlessly in the breeze.
Joel shakes his head. "I don't get it."
"Me either. Maybe they're all... staying inside?"
"The whole town? There's what, ten, twelve buildings in there? That's enough for us to see someone. Maybe something happened to 'em. When's the last time you talked to him?"
"Only a couple of days ago, but well, anything could happen in a couple days, but look... Nothing's out of place. It doesn't look like there's been any fighting, and if a town got overrun with infected, they'd still be hanging around. Maybe they're out? Scouting the road to ambush us? We're not supposed to be here until tomorrow." She nods toward a more heavily wooded section outside the fence, the best cover they can get. "Let's get closer."
They pick their way through the brush, stepping carefully through dried, late summer grass and scattering of leaves that have started to fall from the trees. She's trailing behind him when the sunlight breaks from the clouds, dazzling, and the glint is nearly lost in the glare, there for a moment, then gone again when the clouds return.
"Stop," she says, low and urgent.
Joel freezes in front of her, barely breathing.
It could be nothing, but the hairs raise on the back of her neck, and the pit of her stomach is icy cold. She moves slowly, crouching and tilting her head until she finds it again, just there, a few feet in front of his leg. Another step, maybe two, and he'd have walked right through it.
"Step back, just a little."
The leaves crunch as he does, and she follows the wire to a post that's nearly lost under the cover of leaves and branches and camouflage cloth. At the top of the post, right at head height, the barrel of a gun is just visible. She points, her hand trembling slightly.
"There. Do you see it?"
There's a long pause, then a sharply drawn breath.
"Fuck. Yeah, I see it."
"Okay, okay, we're gonna go back the way we came and make sure where we put our feet, okay?"
"Yeah, Jesus. How did you even see that?"
"It caught the light just right. Holy shit."
She's shaking. She presses a fist to her mouth and takes a couple slow breaths. Another step, she thinks, and closes her eyes tightly.
He rubs her arm and carefully steps around her.
"Stay a ways behind me."
"No, Joel..."
"Yes. You fuckin' listen to me and stay a ways back, Tess."
Their progress is comically slow, creeping forward until they're back at the road. Tess leans her forehead against his shoulder and says, "Okay, well, I guess we know not to do that again."
"Your guy say anything about traps?"
"No, but he was really insistent about which road we should come in on, so maybe that makes a little more sense now." She laughed. "Fuck me, I thought the road was the trap."
He looks at the sky then says, "We got a couple hours until sunset. Why don't we figure out where we're holing up for the night."
They backtrack a bit, then cut across an open field to the road they're supposed to be on. The sprawling houses have garages bigger than anyplace she's ever lived. They pick one - cedarwood, board and batten, real nice work, Joel explains - and break very quietly into the smallest of the four outbuildings.
It's a garage for a small tractor, neat as a pin under the layer of dust and cobwebs. It seems excessively ornate for a piece of farm equipment, and Joel mutters, "Hobby farmers," under his breath. She doesn't care. There's two full gas cans to be picked up on their way back to the QZ, and the building's nice and sturdy.
They split the bounty they'd collected from the garden, and settle into a back corner, backs to adjoining walls. She drapes her legs over his and yawns. "We should leave the rifle and my Colt here. Most of the food and water, too."
He looks disgusted at the idea.
"They're gonna disarm us, you know that. This way they can't steal everything. The Colt's the nicest one we've got. I'll hang on to the shitty Mossberg we got off Robert. No one's gonna want to steal that, and if they do they're welcome to it. And we can afford to lose your Taurus because we've got another one stashed in Sommerville."
His jaw works like he's literally chewing on the idea, then he shakes his head and rolls his eyes.
"Fine."
"Good." She sighs. "I know you don't like this, but please just... try? This could be really valuable."
He nods, then lifts her hand and kisses her palm. "Get some sleep. I'll wake you when it's your turn to watch."
Tess's neck prickles as they approach the town, a crawling sensation that spreads down her back. The man standing back from the gate is motionless, pistol held steady. He's got a rifle slung over one shoulder in addition to the pistol, and he looks more than a little feral with his long hair and full beard.
Joel keeps himself in front of her.
"Hi," she calls. "Are you Frank?"
"Hands up," he replies. The voice doesn't seem right, but the radio quality isn't great. She scans the area behind him, looking for more people but there's not even a hint of movement.
"Okay," she says, raising her hands slowly, stepping sideways a little to see him better. "I'm Tess, the one you've been talking to, and this is Joel. There's no one else with us, okay?"
The man gestures with the gun. "You armed?"
"Of course we're fucking armed," Joel says. "You think we came all this way unarmed?"
"Hey," Tess says. "It's okay, we're gonna lay our guns down, alright?"
She steps around Joel and carefully, slowly places her handgun on the ground, then backs off, hands raised. She smacks Joel in the side and nods forward. Your turn.
She thinks he'll refuse. There's a moment when he meets her eyes and she's sure he's going to refuse, and she tenses, gearing up for a fight, then he sighs deeply and mutters, "Fucking fine."
"Good," the man says, lowering one hand to retrieve something from his belt. He uses a remote to open the gate, returns the controller to it's place, then reaches for something else on his belt like some apocalyptic Batman. He holds out a tester and points the gun at Tess. "You, come to the gate nice and slow."
"Not her," Joel says.
"Joel, it's fine."
She squeezes his arm and watches him closely. He doesn't say anything, doesn't even nod, but she can see the acceptance in the slight change in his expression.
She steps forward slowly and tries not to flinch away from the gun so close to her head as he presses the tester to her neck. She still winces at the sting of it, and lets out a breath when it beeps cheerfully.
"Alright, you next. Don't fucking try anything."
She nods, just barely and Joel steps forward, and her shoulders relax when it turns green for him as all. FEDRA's not exactly open with their research papers, and she's got no idea what the rate of false positives is for those things.
"Are you done with your little security theater show now?" a voice calls.
"Frank!"
Tess looks toward the nearest house - Dutch Colonial, Joel had muttered on their approach to the gate - and sees a second man striding across the lawn.
"Would you just listen to me and stay the fuck back there, Frank!"
A jolt of recognition hits her. The tone is so familiar - even the words- and she knows without question that these two men are the town. There's no one else. There wouldn't be room for anyone else. She looks to Joel, but he doesn't seem to have noticed the similarity.
"Oh, come on. Enough."
The second man is just slightly taller, a little thinner, and far more charming. His smile is wide and warm and genuine, and Tess feels some of the tension ebb away as she returns it.
"Frank."
"How was the walk?" He asks, stopping just beside the first man. He's nearly bouncing with excitement. "You didn't have any trouble, did you?"
"No, it was fine. Thank you for the location of that farm, by the way, it's a great place to know about."
The other man scowls. "Frank!"
He waves a hand in the air. "Don't mind Bill, he's not used to company. Yet! I'm sure he'll get used to the two of you. Eventually. Bill, go pick up their guns, we can't leave them lying outside like that. Have you two eaten lunch?"
Tess blinks, dazzled. "Uh, no! No, we haven't."
"Great!"
He heads away from the gate, earning another outburst from Bill. Tess glances at Joel, who's scowling as Bill picks up their guns, and follows Frank.
"Ignore him," Frank says.
"Oh, here," Tess says, letting her pack slip down one arm as she reaches for the zipper.
"Drop it!"
Joel shoves her behind him and growls, "If you don't stop pointing that fuckin' gun at her I will shove it down your throat."
The two men glare at each other, then Bill's head jerks back and he squints at Joel. Recognition, Tess thinks. He sees it too.
"Sorry." Tess holds her hands out, letting her pack fall to the ground. "Sorry, I'm sorry, that was my bad," she says. "I'm gonna open it up and take out the stuff we brought for you, alright?"
She waits until Bill nods, and then waits until Joel unclenches his fists. She pulls the bag out and hands it to Frank.
"You got it! Oh, this is going to be great for the greenhouse. It'll make starting seedlings so much easier. See, Bill?"
He holds the bag up and smiles, then shakes it in the air when he doesn't get a response. "See?"
"I see it."
"Come on, let's get you off your feet. How long did it take you to get here?"
Tess follows, chatting idly with Frank, looking around the tidy little settlement with open curiosity. Everything is well-tended, although the paint is looking a little shabby, and the lawns haven't been watered through the summer. It's unsettling how normal it looks.
They approach a big white house with striking black shutters and her eyes fix on the trailer at the side of the house, head turning as they walk past it.
"Oh, Jesus," Joel mutters.
"How much for the boat?" she asks.
Bill glares. "Not for sale."
"Worth a shot."
Bill glances over at her. He's still holding the gun, but at least he's pointing it at the ground now. "What do you even want with a boat?"
"Thank you," Joel says under his breath.
"We live in a place that's like seventy percent waterfront. Explain to me why a boat isn't a good idea."
Bill stops and gives her a long look. "Do you even know how to operate a boat?"
"Is that what you call it? 'Operating a boat'? I've been saying 'drive'. Anyway, it can't be that hard."
He juts out his jaw and bites back his reply before shooting an irritated look at Joel.
"What?" he asks. "You think I want her havin' a fuckin' boat?"
Frank claps his hands. "Let's have lunch, why don't we?"
Tess kneels to retrieve the guns, slipped into a space beneath a loose board at the side of the small garage. She's unexpectedly exhausted, vaguely drunk, and irritated at the thought of the long walk ahead of them. Going back will be faster, but it will still be dark before they get back to the QZ. Good for getting through the buffer zone, though. She's running the route in her head, working out where they can stop for the night if they get delayed and it gets too dark when he says, "You wanna find a place like that?"
The question catches her off guard, and she gives him a startled look. She hands him his rifle, looking down at their hands.
"It'd be work, but we could do it."
Her throat is suddenly tight, and she shoulders her pack without answering. She turns to leave, but he catches her arm.
"Tess."
She shakes her head. "You know it wouldn't work. He was ready for this before it even happened, and he still doesn't have everything they need. We'd never... we'd never have what we need and we'd die trying to find it."
He clenches his jaw and looks away.
"Hey."
She leans up and kisses him when he looks back at her. He leans his forehead against hers and sighs.
"Let's get the fuck out of here."