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The mansion loomed at the end of the long driveway, the black car that had come to pick Felix up that morning slowly making its way to the front door. A fountain had been built in front of the house, a path wrapped around it with perfect hedges and flowers blooming in the small patches of dirt.
Felix had never seen a house the size of the Bang mansion. It towered over grounds — spanning over ten acres, a combination between neatly trimmed lawns and a forest — with its four floors, wide in its size. Large windows spanned the entire structure, the double front doors a deep, dark wooden colour.
As the sun started to set, the building looked even more intimidating than it had in the pictures. Felix had only been given a few photos from the agency, the Bangs preferring their privacy over anything else, and they hadn’t done it justice. While the walls were a beautiful dark brick, the windows had been painted white. Pillars broke apart the front, making the house look like an old Victorian English home.
The driver didn’t utter a word. His silence had been carefully bought with the right amount of money, keeping him from saying things he shouldn’t. The rich, the one percent, had that privilege.
And it should piss Felix off, but it didn’t. Instead, it fuelled his curiosity even more. Everyone at the agency had wanted this job — the moment it figuratively fell through their mailbox, everyone clambered to get it. Felix had never doubted the fact that it belonged to him, though.
Their Mistress had always held out for Felix, promising him that a job worthy of him would one day come and take him away. And it had come, just like she had said it would. The others hadn’t been happy when the Mistress announced it, but Felix hadn’t cared. He still didn’t — having people around him in the agency dorms had been nice and all, but he had not come to find friendship among people like him.
No, he had come to receive what he had always dreamt of.
The car came to a stop in front of the large steps in front of the house. Felix swallowed, pushing his hands down against his thighs until it hurt. The Bangs were not allowed to see his nerves — not yet. Felix wanted to please them, and anxiety wouldn’t do the trick.
Without a word, the driver opened his door and got out of the car. Felix stayed seated, having read the contract over and over again, meticulously going through it with a fine-tooth comb to make sure he understood everything.
One of the rules the Bangs wanted Felix to follow right away was giving up control. Even though Felix had never met them, he had no problem doing this. It meant having to wait until the driver opened his door, helping him out of the car without a single sound made. The driver tipped his head in a bow, leaving Felix to stand with his back turned to the car.
From up close, the mansion seemed to loom into the clouds. He blinked up at the sight, the setting sun reflecting in the many windows along the walls. Pink, mixed with a light orange lit up the rest of the world, but Felix didn’t turn around to look.
The sound of gravel crunching made his shoulders tense. The car’s engine turned on, its wheels turning on the gravel to make its way back down the driveway. Within moments, Felix was alone.
His Mistress had presented the contract, the assignment, with a flourish. Felix had always been her favourite, her most prized possession the moment he had come through the agency doors. It was the very reason why he had stayed so long — the promise of a placement that would make his wildest dreams come true.
Looking at the house, Felix’s hands trembled where he had pushed them behind his back. He left his suitcase and bag behind, the matching set at the bottom of the stairs as he climbed up the first few.
Last week, the suitcase and bag had come to Felix’s door. Bang had been engraved on both items, along with a tag that clearly stated where to return them when found. The sturdiness of the leather bag and its twin-suitcase had cemented this placement for Felix: this was right for him.
Somewhere, a bird began singing. Felix didn’t bother to look where its music came from, taking the last few steps to the front door. Instead of a doorbell, two large door knockers served as handles, the phoenixes staring back at Felix as if daring him to touch them.
He cleared his throat, trying to keep his hands from shaking as he reached for the left phoenix. Taking the ring in one hand, Felix pushed it against the wooden front door once, twice, three times before letting go. Immediately, he took three steps back to make room for whoever it was that would come and open the door.
Some people at the agency feared the Bangs. It was ridiculous, of course, seeing as the Bangs were the most respectable household in the area. They were involved in shady businesses, but that didn’t put Felix off at all. Instead, it fueled a little fire inside him that he hadn’t known existed.
His Mistress called it hearsay while others argued. Many agencies had tried to get an assignment from the Bangs, but they had simply never been in need of anyone’s services. Something had changed, though, and they had chosen Felix to solve whatever it was that needed solving.
A shadow appeared behind the frosted glass of the front door. Felix grew rigid, shoulders raised slightly as a lock turned. The sound vibrated through his skull, making his skin tingle as the doors swung open.
Felix swallowed again before smiling. A man not much older than him stood in front of him, eyes cutting as he looked at Felix. Silently, the man took in Felix completely — his eyes roaming from Felix’s toes all the way to his face and back down again. They lingered on his lips, making heat spread across Felix’s cheeks.
The man’s hair was styled up in a small ponytail, the rest of his hair falling across his face. With his tan skin and perfect proportions, he looked every bit like a god. Felix’s mouth instantly felt dry looking at the man, his brown eyes intimidating. A slit had been added to his right eyebrow, finishing his look completely. Paired with the black blouse and black trousers he was wearing, the man looked lethal.
“You must be Felix.”
Felix blinked before nodding. “Yes, I am.”
A wicked grin spread across the man’s face. For anyone else, it would have been a strange sight. For Felix, it meant only one thing: this placement was perfect for him.
“I’m Bang Hyunjin. Come in.”
*
The agency had given Felix seven names, their profiles mere skeletons of the files Felix usually saw. The questions on the profiles were pretty ordinary, simple. Yet, these men had answered them with barely one or two words. As if they didn’t wish to give out any information whatsoever.
Bang Hyunjin was not the youngest, nor the oldest. He was the one that Felix could have recognised, had his brain not given up the moment he saw the gates of the Bang mansion. Hyunjin had been in multiple fashion campaigns before, only having retired from the business a year or so ago.
Felix followed the man, one step behind him at all times, through the labyrinth of hallways. The entryway had been large — a staircase split into two on both sides of the room, dark wood covered with a forest green carpet. A portrait hung close to the front door, displaying seven different figures. The Bangs, perhaps?
Hyunjin didn’t say a word as they walked. He looked around, leading Felix further and further into the house until they reached another pair of doors. These were a stark white, the wood barely blemished or worked upon. The silver door handles gleamed in the soft hue coming from the ceiling lights, beautifully clean and proper.
Apparently, the Bangs were very big on keeping their home immaculate, neat. Felix had read it in their file, time and time again, but seeing it made it all the more real. The cabinets and shelves in the hallway he stood in didn’t have a speck of dust on them, void of anything that didn’t look like it belonged there.
That didn’t mean it was sterile. It was the opposite, almost — the shelves, side tables and other surfaces were covered with trinkets, the walls a dark blue but hidden behind paintings and photographs. The photos looked — beautiful. Lonely, perhaps.
One in particular made Felix’s eyes widen a little. The photographer had captured the beach in a black and white picture, the waves a clear contrast to the sandy shores. A lone figure stood up to their hips in the water, head thrown back. Even without their face being shown, the despair radiated off of the picture.
“You like that one?”
Hyunjin’s voice made Felix jump slightly. He turned his head to find Hyunjin smirking at him, a glint in his eyes. Felix swallowed, willing his heart to calm down. He needed to be professional, at least until the first meeting was over and expectations had been discussed. Felix had been preparing for this since the day he walked into the agency and met his Mistress — he couldn’t mess this up.
He nodded, “I do. It speaks, almost.”
“Well,” Hyunjin’s smirk turned into a grin. “Thank you.”
Felix couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow, quickly dropping it. The split second had been enough, though, Hyunjin’s eyes already narrowing slightly. “Is it not customary to thank someone after you receive a compliment?”
“I—” Felix stumbled over his words, cursing himself mentally. This was not a great first impression — he needed to get it together. “I didn’t know you took it.”
Hyunjin’s eyes relaxed a little. Footsteps echoed behind the double doors, making Felix’s hairs stand on end. He didn’t move toward it, however. Instead, he stayed focused on Hyunjin. “I did. Our wonderful Jeongin modelled for me.”
Bang Jeongin was the youngest, and technically the most recent addition to the household according to their files. Despite being the youngest, though, the man carried a great responsibility within the Bang Empire. “It’s good.”
“Thank you again.” Hyunjin nodded his head, turning back to the double doors. Felix closed his eyes briefly, pushing down the bile threatening to rise up his throat. Perhaps he underestimated this assignment. These men — they were clouded in mystery, all of them equally elusive and strange. No one had ever been able to get a clear read on them, and who was Felix to think that he could? “Now, I think it’s time to meet the others.”
Felix couldn’t reject that. He had no grounds to. Part of him, the sliver of doubt that had nestled itself within him ever since getting into the car that morning, wanted him to turn back and run as far away as he could. He couldn’t, though. His life was with the Bangs now, the contract signed and sealed with his own signature. “I would love to.”
Hyunjin winked before pushing open the double doors with a flourish, not allowing Felix to find his ground or take another deep breath. He rushed to follow Hyunjin, the doors closing behind his back almost instantly. Like a movie.
The room behind covered a great space. One wall consisted almost completely of large windows, looking out on what Felix presumed to be part of the grounds. It had gotten too dark to see much apart from where the outside lights showed, displaying patches of grass and hedges in the otherwise dark void.
If one had knowledge of such things, the room almost resembled a nineteenth century sitting room. With the forest green and maroon red accents, the room managed to look intimidating in and of itself. A fireplace had been built into one of the walls, a large carpet right in front of it. Three couches stood in formation, a television hanging above the fireplace.
Bookcases lined the rest of the walls, the only disordered colours anywhere in the room.
Felix blinked. Hyunjin dropped himself down onto one of the couches, where six other figures were already sitting. Instantly, Felix’s throat ran dry. He had prepared for this moment for weeks, and now that it was here, he didn’t know what to do. His Mistress’ faith in him was misplaced. He couldn’t do this.
Instead of turning back, though, he straightened his shoulders. A breach of contract meant one thing: death. Running away would certainly fall into that criteria, and so Felix walked around the couches and presented himself in the way he had been taught to.
He kneeled in front of the seven men, placing his hands behind his back. His knees complained a little at the sudden change, though quickly adjusted to the soft feeling of carpet pressing against them. Felix bowed his head, only allowing himself to see the shoes of those sitting on the couch.
Six of them wore dress shoes, or black sneakers. One of them was wearing baby-blue coloured socks, their toes digging into the dark carpet as a pair of dress shoes bordered them.
Felix bit his lip, focusing his eyes on a spot on the carpet.
Hyunjin cleared his throat. “This is Lee Felix.”
A murmur went through the room. Felix’s heart sped up, the sound ringing in his ears. The sound of his name rolling off of Hyunjin’s tongue was like liquid gold, heavenly in its own way. What did the others sound like, when they said his name?
“He’s prettier than expected.” Someone said, the voice a low timber. Felix withheld a shiver, the compliment seeping into his skin.
Another person cleared their throat. “Definitely. His pictures don’t do him justice.”
“And he sits so well.”
“Can I—”
“Jisungie, not yet.” someone scolded. Felix’s cheeks heated up within a split second, eyes moving to look at the sock clad feet through his eyelashes.
The person belonging to them — Bang Jisung — whined, though he didn’t speak further. Felix couldn’t help but admire the way they had trained him. It wouldn’t surprise him if he was the same in a few weeks time.
“You may rise.”
The voice held such authority, Felix couldn’t suppress his shiver this time. He rose up from his kneeling position, straightening his legs and his head. Across from him, seven men sat dressed in similar fashions to Hyunjin. Black top, black bottom. Apart from one — Bang Chan. He wore a suit, white blouse peeking through at the front.
Felix’s knees threatened to give out as the oldest of the Bang Empire eyed him from head to toe, Hyunjin’s earlier hunger mirrored in them almost exactly. He managed to stay upright, clenching his hands into fists behind his back. “Thank you, sir.”
Someone snorted. Bang Seungmin shook his head, turning to the man next to him. Bang Changbin looked just as amused, rolling his eyes. “You are too nervous.”
Felix swallowed. “My— my apologies.”
Chan rose from his position, coming closer to Felix. Instantly, Felix’s entire field of vision was blocked by the man’s stature, the way he held himself. They were roughly the same height, and yet Chan could have crushed him like a bug. “There’s no need for apologies, baby. All we ask, from now on, is that you call us by our names.”
“Okay. I will.” Felix replied, tongue heavy in his mouth. Everyone in the agency had always spoken of the Bang family as an enigma, as mysterious humans who were dark and cold. Their home was centuries old and looked the part, intimidating and cold in its exterior, and yet, despite the dark, the inside felt warmer than Felix had ever felt before.
Chan smiled at him, though the glint in his eyes didn’t leave fully. It simmered somewhere in them, hidden by the dark brown of his pupils. Felix was transfixed already. “Shall we do the formal introductions then?”
*
Before the agency, before his Mistress, Felix had lived in a home. A shared home, one that housed people like him; Littles that were undesirable. More often than not, those Littles had some sort of problem, and were therefore not perfect enough. Most Littles could not stay with their family for too long after presenting for their own health, and were in need of a caregiver. It worked the same way for caregivers, but there were considerably less undesired caregivers than there were Littles. And so, homes were created to house Littles that had no one else.
Felix had been one of those Littles. After presenting as one at the age of eighteen, he tried to live with his parents for as long as he could. But they grew sick of him quite quickly, and so he had been put in a home. There, he met more Littles like him — ones that were not liked, not lovely enough to have found a caregiver, a life partner by themselves.
Unfortunately, after a while, the homes needed to make room for others. And so, Felix and several of his housemates were ousted onto the street. But Felix had always dreamt of a caregiver, of being part of something, and so he had found the agency. His Mistress took one look at him and gave him a room, one he had to pay for by working in her cafe with all the others.
She housed caregivers, too, but they were strictly forbidden to bond with one another while under her roof. Felix had signed the contract, and had stuck to it.
A year after joining, the whispers started. People saying that the Bang household wanted a Little, wanted one more. They already had one, found him by themselves without much trouble. However, one Little for six caregivers was quite the difference. It only made sense that they were looking for another one.
The city housed multiple agencies. Once the whispers had started, they didn’t stop until the file presented itself at Felix’s agency, in the hands of his Mistress. According to her, Felix was the perfect Little for these men.
Now, as he stood in front of the Bangs, he still wondered what had made her think so. There was a reason why Felix wasn’t as desirable as other Littles; he had less control of his regression than others, something he had tried hard to fix but never actually did, and he had a deeper voice than most others.
There was little time to start doubting himself again, however, as the Bangs introduced themselves. Chan, Seungmin, Changbin, Minho, Hyunjin, Jeongin and Jisung. Jisung gave Felix a cute wave, eyes as wide as saucers.
Just looking at him made Felix’s own vision hazy at the edges, his brain already starting to slip. He clenched his hands into fists to try and stop it like he had been taught — he couldn’t. Not yet.
“It’s an honour to meet you all.” Felix said instead, bowing his head once more.
His Mistress had told Felix that she had recommended him as one of the options for the Bangs. Of course, they deserved multiple options, but it had served to make Felix anxious. Compared to some of the others listed, Felix was nowhere near perfect enough for the Bang household. His bravado, his hope had sunk incredibly low when, a few days later, his Mistress summoned him to tell him that the Bangs had taken one look at his profile and chosen him.
They had chosen Felix. And now here he stood, in their mansion.
“We like how well behaved you are.” Minho broke the silence that had fallen after Felix’s words with a small frown, “But that will only be necessary when we are preoccupied with other things.”
Felix swallowed before nodding. Of course, he had read that in the contract as well. The Bang family lived by certain rules, which included that whenever a Little was regressed, there was to be no sexual contact whatsoever. However, when a Little was not regressed and they were engaged in sexual acts, Felix was to act submissive to them.
Naturally, Felix had flushed down to his very toes after reading that clause, all the more eager to sign.
“Of course.” Felix replied.
“Your freckles are exquisite, Felix.” Hyunjin said, leaning forward to rest his head in his hands as his eyes bore into Felix. With his elbows resting on his knees, he looked good enough to eat. These men knew they were gorgeous, God’s gift to earth. “Can I paint them one day?”
His cheeks burned a bright red. Felix nodded, “Yes, of — of course.”
“Does that mean I won’t have to model anymore?” Jeongin asked, a grin on his face. “Thank you, Felix.”
“Hey—”
“Does Lixie like dollhouses?” Jisung asked, interrupting Hyunjin with his soft words.
Felix pinched at the sensitive skin of his wrist, trying his hardest not to regress immediately as he looked at Jisung. With his denim overalls that ended in shorts and bright yellow shirt, he looked the very picture of a perfect Little. The desire to be just that burned in Felix’s chest, creating a warmth where his heart was beating. “Lixie does.”
Jisung lit up immediately, scrambling to get off of Minho’s lap. Minho let him go, a small smile on his face. The way the six men looked at Jisung as he walked up to Felix nearly made him melt — the adoration was clear in their eyes, the protectiveness. Jisung was theirs to protect, in every way. Felix wanted it so much, it hurt. “And Legos?”
Unable to hold in a gasp, Felix nodded eagerly. His brain screamed at him to let go, to let it happen, but he held onto the last bit of resolve that he could scramble to collect. “I love Legos.”
“Oh boy.” Chan huffed, a chuckle leaving his lips. “Are we going to have to buy more sets?”
“We can expand my town!” Jisung yelped, eyes even wider as he took Felix’s hand. “I have a hospital, and a jail for the bad guys, and a pizza place, and a bookshop and a hotel—”
“Jisungie,” Seungmin said, interrupting the Little. “Don’t overwhelm him.”
“Oh.” Jisung’s mouth formed the syllable with great exaggeration. “Sorry.”
Felix shook his head, body already thrumming with joy. Not only did he have caregivers now, he also had a playmate. A Little to actually play with, something that hadn’t been allowed at the agency or in his home before that. “It’s okay.”
“You look pained, Felix.” Changbin said, frowning. “Are you holding it back?”
“Never do that.” Chan rose from his seat once more, walking up to both Jisung and Felix. Jisung stepped away eagerly, taking a seat on Jeongin’s lap this time. The youngest was quick to wrap his arms around Jisung’s waist, tugging him against his chest.
A hand cupped Felix’s chin, making him turn his head to look Chan in the eyes. “Never suppress yourself, understood?”
Felix blinked, tongue too heavy to form words as his brain registered the feeling of Chan holding his chin like this. “I — understood.”
“Good.” Chan pulled back, a whine escaping Felix’s lips before he was able to stop it. His eyes widened, though his anxiety washed away at the smirk Chan gave him. “Don’t worry baby, I’m not going anywhere. We should get you into something more comfortable, shouldn’t we?”
*
Felix had liked living in the agency. He had had two roommates, both of which had gotten placements and assignments before him, which had left him all alone in their room. The work at the cafe hadn’t been bad, either, and it was nice to be able to make his own money even though a large sum of it went right back to his Mistress.
His room, however, could never compare to the room Chan, Hyunjin and Seungmin guided him into. Jisung, Minho, Changbin and Jeongin were somewhere else in the mansion, apparently preparing dinner for all of them. Felix hadn’t eaten anything since that morning, far too nervous to even think about food — at the mention of dinner, his stomach had rumbled making Hyunjin wink at him.
This room was larger — at least twice the size of his room at the agency. And this was for himself — all for him. The walls were painted a baby blue, one wall a soft pink instead. Fairy lights hung around the room, creating an almost fairy like atmosphere. Toys were neatly placed on shelves, a small bookcase standing close to a single bed in the corner. A large window looked out onto the grounds below, though nothing much could be seen because of the darkness cloaking the outside world.
Another door was off to the side. Felix’s curiosity made him want to go in, but he kept his mouth shut. He wanted to ask — had so many questions — but this room was such a stark difference from the dark and intimidating thing he had expected, it made his mind reel and unable to come up with any words at all.
Chan and Seungmin walked through an archway in the wall, lights triggered on by their movement. Clothes hung in the small room they had walked into, an array of colours and styles barely visible to Felix. He gasped, unable to stop the sound from coming out. “Is that—”
Hyunjin hummed, taking Felix’s hand. He pulled Felix to a stool, pushing him down. Felix went willingly, heart already fluttering at the touches. His Mistress hadn’t allowed any sort of intimate contact between her littles and caregivers. Felix had not been touched in a while. “Those are yours.”
Felix turned his head to look at the archway again, and the clothes in the walk-in closet. Seungmin and Chan were gone now, disappeared from view. Felix’s eyes widened — just how big was the closet? “I— thank you.”
“No need for all of that,” Hyunjin whispered, his hands finding their way into Felix’s hair. Skillfully, they removed the two small hair clips Felix had put in to keep it out of his face, the hair falling back into place around his cheeks. Hyunjin’s words fanned out across his neck, making him shiver. “Gratitude is a given in this house. If we feel like it’s not, we talk about it.”
Felix couldn’t imagine not being grateful for any of this. He nodded. “Okay.”
“You’re a cutie.” Hyunjin continued, hands not leaving Felix’s hair. They started carding through the locks, long fingers massaging Felix’s scalp with ease. Felix closed his eyes, shoulders relaxing and a weight dropping off of his chest. “Chan and Seungmin will find the perfect outfit for you.”
Truthfully, Felix had dreamt of this moment. Of receiving such care. Ever since his presentation as a Little, he had been deprived of it. His nature screamed at him to let go, to sink into that feeling that was still unfamiliar to him, but he resisted. Chan had told him to never keep himself at bay, but the last thing Felix wanted was to not be fully present when Chan and Seungmin came back.
Hyunjin made a noise in the back of his throat. Felix opened his eyes again, sight now a little hazy. “I want to put your hair into pigtails, is that okay?”
Felix hummed, “Please.”
Without another word, Hyunjin’s hands reached for a brush that Felix hadn’t even noticed lay on the shelf next to him. The touch of a brush was not foreign to him — however, someone else doing it for him hadn’t happened for so long, tears immediately jumped up to his eyes.
Hyunjin brushed his hair with the patience of a saint, careful and calculated. By the time the slight tugging started to get his hair into the pigtails, Felix was well and truly relaxed. “They’re certainly taking a while, aren’t they?”
Humming again, Felix bit his lip. “Maybe they can’t—”
“Here we are!” Seungmin’s voice interrupted him. Felix closed his mouth immediately, relief washing through him. Even though he knew that there was no reason to be worried, he couldn’t help himself. The contract the Bangs signed was as binding as his own — they couldn’t back out of this, either.
With a flourish, Hyunjin turned Felix around on the stool. Felix’s gaze swooped before focusing on the two men standing in front of him, holding an array of clothes. Chan looked proud, holding onto a baby pink sweater and socks while Seungmin held out a pair of white, comfortable shorts.
The tears threatened to spill. Felix reached for the clothes without a word, the fabric soft underneath his tainted fingers. This was too much — it almost felt like he didn’t deserve it. “I—”
“Hyunjin did a great job on your hair.” Seungmin said, interrupting Felix again. Felix didn’t care, though, for the words breathed some courage back into him. “You look adorable. Jeongin and Minho are going to faint.”
“Changbin is going to want to sit with you immediately.”
“What about Jisungie? He’s going to freak.”
Seungmin and Hyunjin gushed as Chan helped Felix off of the stool. Felix’s cheeks were burning, probably bright red from the praise Seungmin and Hyunjin were giving him, but he didn’t dare hide. Something about Chan’s demeanour told him that it wouldn’t be tolerated.
“Can I undress you?”
Felix’s eyes widened. His tongue felt too heavy for his mouth, vocal chords unable to form words. He nodded, raising his arms in hope that Chan would get it. He seemed to do so, eyes taking on a glint that Felix hadn’t seen before.
Chan was skillful in undressing him — he had clearly done this many times before. Did all of them take care of Jisungie in the same way? Or did they all have different tasks they adhered to? Felix had so many questions, but this didn’t seem like the time to ask them.
Before Felix knew it, Chan pulled the sweater over Felix’s head, careful not to disturb the pigtails. The fabric was softer than anything Felix had ever felt before, the sleeves slightly too long. Immediately, Felix balled his hands up into fists to create sweater paws — his most comfortable position.
The shorts were just the right size, reaching just above his knee. They didn’t have a zipper or a button, making them stretchy and incredibly comfortable. The socks truly finished the look, ending right beneath his knees. Curling his toes into the carpet, Felix flushed a bright red as Seungmin, Hyunjin and Chan stood behind him and looked at him through the mirror. “You look wonderful.”
Felix bit his lip at Hyunjin’s words. “Thank you.”
Chan flashed a smile. “Hyunjin explained that to you, didn’t he?”
“He did,” Felix replied, voice a little softer. “But I still wanted to say it.”
He had never felt this comfortable in clothes in his entire life. Before his presentation, he wore regular clothes just like anyone else. After, his parents didn’t want to put up with him for much longer. Not because he was a Little, but because he wasn’t perfect enough. In the home, Felix had had access to a limited source of clothes and toys, and the agency had had barely anything at all.
To be able to wear an outfit like this, with a hairstyle that someone had given him with great care and soft touches, was a marvel. A miracle.
The tears threatened to spill again. Felix wiped at his eyes, hoping the men hadn’t seen him.
“Lixie?”
Lixie.
Felix sobbed as the nickname registered. Instantly, arms wrapped around him and he was lifted up from the floor, into someone’s arms. “Baby— why are you crying?”
“I—”
“He’s overwhelmed. Should we get him to the others?”
“Maybe he needs rest?”
“He needs food. Didn’t you hear his stomach?”
The nervous whispers between Seungmin and Hyunjin were enough to slightly relax Felix as Chan carried him out of the room. He wrapped his legs around the man’s middle, arms around his neck as they went. Chan repeated the same words into Felix’s ear over and over again as they moved, Felix’s eyes closed. “You’re okay. You’re okay baby.”
A hand touched Felix’s forehead gently, a head pat following soon after. Felix relaxed into the touch, the tears continuing to fall. He couldn’t help them anymore — he had never felt this cared for in his entire life, and he had only just arrived at the Bangs. Screw everything that people had said about them — screw it all.
*
The table was set for eight people. Six normal sized plates and cutlery and two plastic plates, little bears drawn on them. Felix looked down at it, vision still hazy at the edges as everyone got settled around him.
Jisung sat across from him, Minho by his side as Changbin and Seungmin walked back and forth from what Felix assumed to be the kitchen into the dining room, carrying different dishes and cuts of meat. Saliva pooled in Felix’s mouth — he had never gone truly hungry at the agency, but food hadn’t been good, either. Tasteless, usually, and leftovers from the cafe that had been left out for too long.
This looked like a four star meal, like a michelin-star cook had made all of it. He swallowed, unable to stop his stomach from rumbling.
Chan’s hold tightened around Felix’s waist. “Have you been hungry long?”
The tone of his voice left no room for arguing. Felix shivered because of it, shaking his head. “No, no. I just — I didn’t eat this morning.”
Jeongin raised an eyebrow from where he sat next to Minho. “Did you not get any food?”
Felix shook his head again, “I did! I was — too nervous to eat it.”
“Eating is important, Lixie.” Chan’s words fanned out onto the bare skin of Felix’s neck. Goosebumps appeared all over his arms and legs, sending a tingling sensation down his spine. He had never been this close to someone before. “Promise to eat properly?”
Without meaning to, Felix’s eyes found Jisung. The other smiled at him, nodding in encouragement. “If we don’t eat, we have to write lines.”
Felix’s eyes widened. “Write lines?”
“We have rules. Our file did tell you that, didn’t it?” Hyunjin asked, helping Seungmin and Changbin with a few glasses of water before the three of them took their seats at the table. “We will go over them with you when you’re a bit more comfortable, of course.”
“It — it did say something about rules, but not all of them were written out properly.” Felix responded. There was no reason to lie to these men — he was theirs, and they would figure it out one way or the other. Felix had studied their file mercilessly ever since getting the assignment and some rules had been included. But these were new to him.
“Well,” Chan huffed, “We’ll talk about it later. For now, the one thing you need to know is that one, you always have to tell the truth and you have to eat at least three meals a day. This doesn’t just mean Jisungie and you, either. It’s for all of us.”
Felix hummed. It made sense, considering Jisung and him were not regressed all the time, nor were they required to be. A wave of relief made Felix’s shoulders sag slightly, his posture dropping. The movement pushed him further into Chan’s front, into the man’s hold. “Okay.”
Jisung seemed to be out of his headspace as well, for his eyes seemed a little clearer as he looked at Felix. “Do you like video games?”
Flushing, Felix tried to match his energy. Chan had said not to suppress himself, but Jisung wasn’t Little now. He shouldn’t be, either. “I’ve only ever played old ones.”
“We can teach you.” Seungmin smiled, helping Minho to serve everyone their first helping of food. “We love video games.”
“What do you like to do, Lixie?” Jeongin asked, leaning back in his chair. Felix’s cheeks grew warm again, closing his eyes briefly. He had written his ‘hobbies’ down in the file the Bangs had received about him, but they were not actual hobbies of his. Resting, reading and listening to music.
The truth was that he had never been able to find himself a hobby outside of those things. The books he had access to were alright, never too great, and the only music he had been able to listen to was the radio they played in the agency and in the home, but Felix liked it well enough. “Reading, and I like music.”
“That can’t be all.” Changbin mused, “There must be something else.”
“Binnie—”
“We’ll find you a hobby you love.” Minho cut in, giving Changbin a look. The other raised his hands in defence before winking at Felix. Felix shyly smiled at him, before Chan moved him around a little.
The dining room was less dark compared to the living room they had greeted Felix in. It appeared that the rooms used for outsiders were darker, while the rest of the mansion, the part that they actually used as a family, a household, were more homey. A nice break, truly, and not at all what Felix expected. Then again, all of his expectations had flown out the window the moment he had walked through the front door.
“Do you want to sit here or your own chair?” Chan asked then, pulling Felix away from where he was looking around the room. A large chandelier hung above the table, right in the middle of the ceiling, the faux candles twinkling and twirling.
Felix swallowed. The fuzz around his vision had gone, making place for a clearer headspace. Part of him was grateful for it — he was still unfamiliar with his own regression, with what it did to him. The least he wanted to do was wait until after dinner before they actually made him regress. “My own, if that’s okay.”
“Always.” Chan replied, words final. There was nothing else to do other than believe him, Felix realised. A sliver of anxiety flew away from him, lightening his shoulders even more.
He shifted off of Chan’s lap and into the empty chair next to the other man, sighing a little. It was colder all of a sudden, and part of Felix wanted to crawl right back into Chan’s lap, but he knew that he shouldn’t. So, he stayed put as Minho put food on his plate as well as on Chan’s, waiting until everyone had their servings before grabbing his cutlery.
“Enjoy.” Jisung said, his smile bright.
Felix looked down at his plate, unable to wrap his head around the amount of food. Meat, rice and sauce as well as vegetables and plenty more still on the table, yet to be put on his plate as it didn’t have any more room. It was the most food Felix had ever seen that was just for him.
The side of his face tingled, making Felix look up. All seven members of the Bang household were watching him, their eyes on him with their forks and knives still on the table. Only Jisung held his own chopsticks, all of them eagerly waiting for Felix to start eating.
Felix flushed again, his cheeks burning as he scooped some food onto his spoon and took a bite. As if the ropes keeping them in place had been cut, the others started doing the same. Soon enough, sounds of cutlery against plates and conversations echoed through the room. The atmosphere was different from what Felix had expected — everyone tried to get him to join their conversations. Different conversations were happening all around the table, yet it still felt like all eight of them were involved somehow.
After, Felix slumped back into his seat with a sigh. His belly felt full, incredibly so, and his brain had gone hazy halfway through the dinner again. Jeongin and Seungmin shot him a knowing look, turning to Chan. “We’re going to take Lixie to the living room. Jisungie, do you want to join us?”
With a control that Felix envied, Jisung’s eyes glazed over slightly. He nodded, his head slipping back into his Little space. Felix swallowed as Jeongin took his hand while Seungmin took hold of Jisung’s, the two caregivers leading them out of the room. “What about the others?”
Jeongin smiled at Felix, “They’ll clean up and join us.”
“I—”
“We’re just going to the living room. There are no requirements, Felix.” Jeongin assured him, dimples appearing on his cheeks. God — this man was so nice, it was a complete one-eighty from what Felix had heard about the Bangs through the grapevine. They were lethal and cunning, leaders of a society so high and mighty it was revered by many — and yet, they were nice, too.
Perhaps they left all of that at the door, and became their own versions of caregivers and partners once they came home. Felix swallowed — he would get to experience that, get to know these men more and more.
He couldn’t help but be excited.
*
The living room — the actual living room, not the dark and broody one Felix first met the Bangs in — was a lot more comfortable. A large television hung on one wall, a few gaming systems that Felix didn’t recognize in the bookcase underneath. An easel stood next to a pair of beautiful french doors, closed for now.
A large nearly u-shaped couch took up most of the space, a carpet beneath it that covered over half of the entire floor. Felix flexed his toes, the softness of it caressing his feet through his socks.
All in all, it looked like a normal living room. Sure, the colours on the wall — a dark red on one, grey on the others — were not as cheerful as how some others might decorate, but Felix quite liked it. It fit the atmosphere of the house and the Bangs perfectly, somehow.
Felix pressed his nails into the palm of his hands as hard as he could, trying to keep himself grounded. “It’s nice.”
“Thanks,” Jeongin replied from behind him, nearly making Felix jump. He had forgotten that some of the others had followed him out of the dining room. Hell, Jeongin had brought him here. Felix really needed to get his ducks in a row. “We wanted to get it professionally done, but Chan doesn’t like strangers in the house.”
Felix’s eyes widened. Technically, he was a stranger. “Oh.”
“Not you, of course.” Jeongin said smoothly, his smile making his dimples appear again. The urge to poke it nearly made Felix reach out. “We don’t allow visitors, only on a rare occasion.”
Felix nodded. It wasn’t like he had anyone that would want to visit him here — his family sure as hell didn’t, and none of the friends he had made at the agency had been formed to last. He was all alone, and he was starting to think that that might be alright. “That makes sense.”
“Now,” Jisung’s voice was loud as he shouted from somewhere, a hand suddenly wrapping around Felix’s wrist and pulling him away from Jeongin. The younger gave Felix a smirk before Jisung pulled Felix away fully, making him turn around to make sure he didn’t accidentally hurt himself. “We are going to play.”
The moment Jisung sat down on the carpet and pulled a large toy box toward him, his eyes glazed over. It was as if someone had flipped a switch within him — his Little space had already come back in the dining room after Jeongin announced they were going to the living room, but now, it was fully here.
Felix cleared his throat, looking behind him. Seungmin and Jeongin were now on the couch, engrossed in a conversation that appeared to be not important. He could sit down beside them and try to join in, ignore Jisung’s obvious plea to play with him.
All of that flew out the window when Jisung opened the box and took out another one filled with markers and two colouring books. The call to sit and colour, to let everything fall away into the background was loud, booming in Felix’s ears as he slowly sat down on the ground across from Jisung.
Their knees touched briefly, earning Felix a soft smile from Jisung. “Do you like colouring?”
Felix nodded, tongue too heavy to form a proper word. His vision was starting to go hazy again, his brain urging him to shut everything else out. Jisung seemed to not need a verbal answer — he was quick to hand Felix a colouring book and open the box of markers, and lay down on his stomach to start and colour in his own books.
For a short breath, Felix looked at the other Little. What were his headspaces? How old did he become, and did he switch between the ages? Jisung still talked in his Little space, but would Felix do the same? Was he going to be younger?
He tried to shake all of that off as he, too, lay down on his stomach. Felix opened the colouring book with shaking fingers, skipping the few that already had colour on them before finding a bare one. A cartoonish cat looked back at him, its paws and tail rounder than any cat ever could be.
Felix loved it already.
He reached for one of the markers — black, for the fur — and took off the lid. As if someone put a blanket over him, a warmth spread through his entire body. His vision blurred, the drawing he wanted to colour disappearing for a second before it came back, this time a bit more lively.
Felix giggled. He swung his feet in the air a little as he placed the marker onto the paper, colouring the first few lines as carefully as he could.
Somewhere, far away, the door opened again. Footsteps echoed through Felix’s skull, but he didn’t look away from his drawing. The only time he did, he checked Jisung’s own. Jisung was colouring in a picture of a farm, three pigs and a few chickens roaming the field. He stayed within the lines more, but Felix found he didn’t care. His cat would look cute regardless.
“He’s adorable.” someone whispered from somewhere. Felix couldn’t place who it was, and where they were, but his cheeks flushed at the comment. Somehow, he knew it was meant for him.
He blinked, looking away from the book and the markers for a moment. Everyone looked back at him, gentle smiles on their faces. Chan scooted forward on the couch, “Are you having fun, baby?”
Felix nodded again. “I am.”
“What are you drawing, Lixie?”
The name rolled off of Hyunjin’s tongue like honey. It sent a tingle down Felix’s spine in the best way, and he couldn’t help but giggle again. “A kitty!”
“A kitty huh?” Hyunjin looked at Minho, grinning. “Do you have any room left on your wall?”
Minho huffed, as if the very idea of running out of space was the most ridiculous thing on the planet. “I do. Always.”
Felix’s eyes widened, a gasp leaving his lips. His kitty would have a home? “You — my kitty will be for you?”
“Only if you make me a cute puppy next.” Seungmin replied.
Hurriedly, Felix flipped the pages until he found a puppy. He held up the colouring book, pointing with his marker. “This one?”
Seungmin chuckled, “That’s perfect baby.”
Felix hummed, “Then you’ll get puppy, and kitty will go to—”
“Daddy Minho always gets kitties.” Jisung interrupted, “He keeps them on his wall and looks at them.”
Daddy Minho. Felix’s eyes widened for a split second, a surge of panic wanting to crawl its way out of his throat. It pushed at the comfortable state his brain was in now, wanting to break through the trance and make him run.
He pushed it away, though, unwilling to get rid of this comforting feeling. It was nice — to have people watching him, to colour in a book that no one wanted to take away from him.
Instead, Felix turned to Minho again with a wide grin. “Thanks!”
“Can I get a drawing then, too?” Changbin asked.
“What about us?” Jeongin’s voice cut through the blissfulness in Felix’s brain, but it didn’t make it want to flee. Instead, he giggled again and turned back to his colouring book. He was going to make the prettiest drawings for his new caregivers, and they were going to love them.
And perhaps, one day, even love Felix.
*
For the first time in his life, Felix belonged. He still had no control over his regression, but it had gotten better the longer he stayed with the Bangs. The more he allowed it to happen, the better he could withstand it when his brain wanted to but it was not the time or place to do so.
Felix spent most of his days with Jisung as well as a constant mix of the caregivers. They played outside when the weather was right, and Felix got his full tour around the mansion on his second day. After colouring with Jisung that night, all of them helped him to bed. At first, it felt embarrassing — but they were so gentle, so comfortable, Felix tried to adapt to that.
And so far, he was doing alright. The caregivers made it clear whenever they needed to take care of one of the Littles or both — which was something Felix had never experienced before either. Hyunjin had come into his room one morning, his eyes anxious beyond belief. Felix reacted immediately, eagerly letting Hyunjin take care of him for a few hours. Seungmin and Jeongin had joined in later, too, with the same anxiety in their bodies.
It made sense, of course. Felix had been taught about it in school, in his biology classes. Littles needed their time, but so did caregivers. It was part of their blood, their genes, and Felix was more than happy to accommodate. The Bangs were eager to take care of him, to be his caregiver, and Felix had stopped pretending he was cool and aloof the very first night here.
Now, after nearly two months, the mansion was no longer intimidating. Instead, it was Felix’s home. He walked the halls with the same comfort as any of the others did, barging into any room without worrying whether he would disturb someone. Sure, he got scolded if he actually did, but never too much.
They had yet to partake in the other side of the contract — the sexual one, which Felix had been eager about when he first read it. But it made sense, and it was nice, that they were taking things slow. Felix had been punished before, spanked or forced to write lines as he misbehaved, but nothing like the things he had thought the men capable of when he first met them.
When he had asked about it during his second week, Minho and Chan had just grinned and told him that there was a time and a place for that, and they would ask Felix about it when he was one hundred percent comfortable. It was nice that they were so careful about it.
Felix had also learned why the Bangs had their reputation. They were lovely, gentle and kind — strict whenever they needed to be — to Jisung and him, but to the outside world, they were stone cold. Nothing could penetrate their walls, their carefully constructed facade. They were powerful, and unafraid to show it to anyone that didn’t belong in their home.
Looking out the window, Felix pouted a little. They hadn’t had a visitor in over a week as the snow had started to come. Only groceries had been delivered, as well as some parcels Chan, Changbin and Seungmin had been particularly eager to receive. Jisung had said it had to do with business, and Felix had forgotten all about it when the other challenged him to a Mario Kart race on their Nintendo Switch.
The snow painted a pretty picture — one Hyunjin had already painted, two silhouettes playing in the white as the sun went down. It hung on the wall in the living room now, above the couch. Felix liked to look at it — Hyunjin had painted him, had eternalized him with art. They had gone into the snow together once, all eight of them, but Felix wanted to go again.
“Can we go outside tomorrow?” He asked, his pout deepening as he turned to look at Changbin and Jeongin, the two caregivers currently watching Jisung and him. While familiarising himself with his Little space, Felix realised that he had multiple ages. Chan had written them down, and Felix recognized this one to be around six or seven.
“Maybe,” Changbin replied, putting away a few of the crayons Jisung had abandoned a few moments prior. The man now sat on the ground with a large box of LEGO’s, creating what looked like a tower. “It depends on how cold it will be, baby.”
Felix huffed, “I can use a coat.”
“Of course you can, but that doesn’t mean it’s safe.” Jeongin gave him a look, showing a dimple. “We’ll just have to see.”
Shrugging, Felix stood up from the windowsill and dropped himself down next to Jisung. The other didn’t react much apart from pushing the box of LEGO’s closer to Felix. “Fine.”
“Felix—”
“Lixie build?” Jisung asked with wide eyes, interrupting Changbin’s warning.
Felix smiled at Jisung, nodding. “Yes.”
He took one of the flat, large squares and a handful of bricks. Creating an outline, Felix decided to build a house. Someone else entered the room, followed by the sounds of the television turning on. Felix didn’t pay it any mind, though, too focused on his LEGO house to look up and see which one of his daddies had come to join them.
Jisung had started building something too, though Felix couldn’t tell what it was. Which was stupid, because LEGO’s were meant to build things with. Not random shapes. Felix frowned, taking a red brick and finishing the last of his walls with a huff.
The pieces he needed for the roof were gone. His frown deepened, tugging the box closer to dig through it. He carded his hands through the hundreds of bricks still in there, creating a loud noise that didn’t go unnoticed.
“Lixie, can you quiet down a little?” Chan asked. Felix looked up, eyes widening. He hadn’t even noticed the man come in. Chan looked a little tired, like he could use a cuddle from either him or Jisung, but Felix found he didn’t care right now. He wanted to finish his house.
He hummed, going back to the box. Movement on his left made Felix look up, Jisung’s stupid structure having used all of the slanted bricks. “Jisungie—”
“Look daddy Chan! It’s done!” Jisung cheered, uncaring of Felix’s call for attention. Chan stood up from the couch, a gasp leaving his lips as he leant down to look at Jisung’s stupid thing. “It’s for you.”
“Oh really,” Chan carefully squatted next to Jisung, a smile on his face. “Thank you Jisungie. I love it.”
Jisung clapped his hands together, applauding himself. Felix huffed again, shaking his head. Before he knew it, he grabbed whatever it was and smashed it on the ground.
The television paused immediately. A quiet fell over the room, the hands on the clock moving two spots before Jisung started screaming. At the sound, tears jumped up to Felix’s eyes and he gasped, hands flying to his face.
“Lixie br—”
“Felix!” Chan called, voice tight. “Why did you do that?”
“I—”
“Lixie mean!”
Mean.
Felix shook his head. “No—”
“Felix, why did you break—”
“I didn’t—” without finishing his sentence, Felix jumped up and ran.
He knew his way around the house on a normal day. Any regular day, Felix walked the halls without a care in the world, perfectly aware as to where he was going. Now, though, he had no idea. It was as if every corner blurred into the next, none of the paintings on the wall that usually guided his way making any sense.
It was as if a cloud had descended upon his vision, his brain, rendering him useless. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he ran, feet nearly slipping on the hallway floors. Felix hiccuped — he had done it. He had ruined it. Jisung hated him now, for ruining his project, and the caregivers were going to send him back. And there was only one thing worse than an undesirable Little — one that had been returned by caregivers that had given them a chance.
A carpet snagged at Felix’s toes, making him stumble. With the tears blurring his vision, he tumbled to the floor. His knees smacked against the hard wooden floors beneath, making him cry out again. He had no idea where he was — the house was so big, with so many rooms and hallways and doors — Felix didn’t know where he was.
He looked around, a door close to where he fell. Felix swallowed, willing down his onslaught of tears as he crawled toward it and opened it. The room beyond was small — a closet that Jeongin and Changbin used for gardening tools — and exactly what Felix needed. If he hid well enough, they wouldn’t be able to find him and send him back. Felix would stay inside the closet and wait for them to forget about him.
Then — then what? He would still be a little without a caregiver.
At the thought, the tears started up again, a wail leaving Felix’s mouth before he could stop it fully. He shook his head, nearly hitting it on a shelf close to the ground. Felix gasped, dodging something as it fell from a higher shelf.
He scratched at his cheeks, eager for the tears to stop. They needed to stop — if they didn’t, the Bangs would send him away.
*
With every single footstep that passed the closet, Felix shuffled further and further backward. He kept his eyes on the door, the tears still streaming down his face. What had he done? They would send him away — tell the agency they had been wrong, and that Felix was not the right fit for them. Felix had clearly done something inexcusable. Jisung was their Little, had been theirs for a long time already. There was no way they would allow this to happen.
Felix swallowed, entire body shaking as the sobs continued to wreck his body. He bit his lip to prevent himself from making any noise, muffling the sounds further by covering his mouth with his hands. Surely, they would stop looking after a while? But then, Felix would be stuck here, in this small closet with things he didn’t recognize right now. If his brain was grown-up, he would know what they were.
A pair of footsteps came close to the closet again. Felix held his breath, barely able to contain the sounds of his tears and sobs. A whine built up in his throat as someone called out his name, but he was determined to stay quiet. Even though his vision was going hazy again due to the sounds coming from the hallway beyond, Felix stayed where he was.
This wasn’t good either, the smarter part of Felix told him. Of course it wasn’t — jolting yourself out of your Little space like that could cause damage, especially now that it wanted to come back to comfort Felix and he wasn’t letting it. But that didn’t matter because Felix had hurt Jisung and in turn hurt his caregivers.
“Lixie—” Jisung called out loudly, voice echoing through the closed door. Felix’s knees wobbled, one hand flying to hold himself up by gripping onto the shelf beside him. One of the cans rattled, making Felix’s eyes widen. “I heard something!”
Felix gasped, looking around. He grabbed the first thing he could — a broom — and pushed it underneath the door handle. He had done that before, back in one of the homes he had stayed at right after leaving his parents. The people that owned the house hadn’t been nice, and the man thought housing the Littles meant he had a free pass to them. Felix always protected his roommates and him by keeping the door barred at night.
The memory sent a shiver down his spine, violent enough to make him drop to his knees. It didn’t matter that Jisung could hear that, too. He couldn’t come in anymore.
“Felix!” Jisung’s voice rang through the door again, vibrating down to where Felix sat on the ground now, slumped forward. He tucked his knees under his chin, closing his eyes. “Felix!”
The door rattled with a force that made Felix jump slightly. The door handle moved up and down, stopped by the broom holding it in place. Someone grunted, hitting the door. “He’s blocked it.”
“Lixie, please.” Hyunjin’s voice came through this time. Felix’s eyes burned with the tears that came again, surging out of him and down his cheeks. “Open the door.”
“Felix, baby, come on.” Chan’s voice was soothing — without a trace of anger. Felix looked up at the door for a moment, taking a deep breath. It could be a trap — they wanted to get him out of the closet and out of the house. “We want to take care of you.”
“We need to take care of you.”
After these past few weeks, Felix had learned to recognize all of their voices. The Bangs all had beautiful ones, soothing when needed and strict when necessary. Felix especially loved to listen to Seungmin and Jeongin sing while Chan played the guitar. They had only done it once and Felix wanted it again. Though, that one time was the last time, because they were making him leave.
Jeongin’s voice sounded pained, as if he had been hit in the stomach. Felix wanted to open the door and hug him tight, his instincts telling him to comfort his caregivers by letting them take care of him, but he pushed that feeling down. It wouldn’t get him anywhere — they would shake him off and tell him to pack his things. “Lixie, please.”
“Felix, if you don’t open that door right now, I will break it down.” Changbin said, “We’re not mad at you.”
Felix couldn’t help the whimper that escaped him. “You — you’re lying!”
“We would never.” This time, Minho’s voice made it through the door. “Remember? We are always honest with each other. What you did wasn’t nice, but there was a reason behind it. We want to know.”
“I can rebuild it, too.” Jisung offered, voice smaller than before. A sharp shot of guilt rushed through Felix — he had made Jisung jump out of his headspace, and now he was slowly going back to it. That wasn’t good for him, either. “We can rebuild it together!”
“Lixie—”
“Felix—”
“Baby—”
“Sunshine.” Chan said. He sounded closer to the door now, as if he was standing toe to toe with it. Felix held up a hand, wishing he could hold Chan’s hand again for one last time. The nickname made his throat hurt, a violent sob releasing itself.
Some shuffling followed Chan’s words, before a loud thud made Felix jump back. He barely had time to get away from the door as much as possible before it flung open with a loud bang as it hit the wall, the broom split into two pieces on the floor.
Felix gasped loudly, his back hitting the furthest wall. Chan was the first into the closet, eyes wide with worry. It made Felix want to cry even louder — he didn’t deserve that. He deserved to be punished, to be sent away.
He whimpered, shaking his head. “I — I can —”
“Sunshine, please.” Chan whispered, taking a few steps forward. Felix had nowhere else to go. He recognized this — remembered it. As if trained, Felix relaxed and offered his face to Chan. “What are you—”
“It’s okay.” Felix interrupted, words garbled by the snot and tears still running down his face and into his mouth. “You can hit me.”
“What?” Chan’s demeanour changed immediately, as if someone had flipped a switch. It wasn’t just him, either — all six caregivers crowded into the closet suddenly, Jisung now on Seungmin’s hip as they all stared at Felix. “What do you mean?”
Felix blinked, still offering his face up. “I — deserve it.”
“Oh,” Chan’s face fell again, shaking his head. “Baby, no. Never. You don’t deserve to be hit, ever.”
“Who hit you?” Hyunjin’s eyes were narrowed like a panther ready to pounce. Perhaps in a different life, he had been one. He sure moved like one. “Who was it?”
“He’s overwhelmed.” Changbin shushed Hyunjin, though he didn’t look any less murderous. All of them looked angry, as if ready to snap at the next person that wronged them. That wronged Felix.
“We’ll figure that out and that person won’t be alive for much longer.” Minho said, breaking away from the rest of them and taking his position next to Chan. Behind them, Changbin, Hyunjin, Seungmin, Jeongin and Jisung looked displeased, but not at Felix.
Felix sobbed again. “I — you’re not — I don’t have to — to leave?”
Hiccups wrecked his words, his sentences, but it seemed to get the message across. Within a split second, Chan lifted him off of the floor and wrapped him up in his arms. Felix sobbed again, the sound wrenching from the deepest, darkest part of him as he scrambled to wrap his arms and legs around Chan, eager to never let go.
Chan kissed his cheek, voice a gentle whisper. “You will never leave again, baby. We’re your daddies, and nothing will make that go away.”
“But—”
“You did something mean, but that doesn’t mean you need to leave.” Chan interrupted with gentle words. The lethal man Felix had seen countless times over the past few weeks was gone completely, disappeared into Chan’s head for the time being. In its place was Chan as a caregiver, similar to the rest of them standing behind him.
Minho caressed Felix’s hair, pursing his lips. “We’re never letting you leave again, sunshine. You’re ours.”
Theirs.
Felix closed his eyes, the tears and sobs finally calming down. “Never? Promise?”
As if rehearsed, all of them opened their mouths. “Never.”
“I’m — I’m sorry. For breaking Jisung’s LEGO’s, and for running.”
“It’s okay, Felixie!” Jisung spoke up, though his cheeks were stained with tears previously shed. Felix hated that he had caused that. “We can build your house together!”
“You’re not—”
“Baby, please. We need you to take a deep breath, and listen to us when we say that everything’s okay.” Minho whispered. Chan moved, walking them and everyone else out of the cramped closet and into the broad hallway beyond. Felix blinked, taking his head out of the crook of Chan’s neck to look at all the caregivers standing close.
Hyunjin looked ready to murder someone, still, while Changbin and Jeongin had calmed down a little more. Seungmin always looked at peace, though there was a glint in his eyes Felix had never seen before. He swallowed, lowering his head again. “I’m sorry.”
“None of that,” Chan whispered again, kissing Felix’s cheek once more. “Can we go into the living room to talk? And clean up?”
Felix hummed, finding Jisung and making grabby hands. Seungmin stepped forward until Jisung and Felix could hold hands, the two of them smiling at each other. “Lixie’s sorry.”
Jisung nodded, a small smile on his face. “Jisungie is too. Lixie needed roof pieces.”
“But I broke your—”
“We can make it again.” Jisung said, voice determined. “But Lixie can never run again. Jisungie was scared.”
Felix hummed again, “never again.”
*
“I want them gone.”
“I don’t care what you have to do. Get it done.”
The voices around the picnic table were loud, four out of the six caregivers holding their phones to their ears while Jeongin and Seungmin sat with Jisung and Felix, all four of them colouring with soft markers. Felix was working on a princess, his tongue in between his lips as he focused to make sure her dress wouldn’t be ruined by him drawing outside of the lines.
Jisung’s drawing was of a knight, holding a sword while on top of a horse. According to Jisung, his knight and Felix’s princess would get married. Felix agreed, already imagining the wedding — pretty flowers and hundreds of guests, all there to celebrate the love these two shared.
“You’re not hearing me.” Chan’s voice grew louder, making Felix look up from his drawing. The oldest of them all stood a little off to the side, clutching his phone in his hand as he continued talking. “I want them all gone. They are nobodies, and they deserve to be dead.”
Felix frowned, “What is daddy Channie talking about?”
“Nothing for you to worry about baby,” Seungmin shook his head, pointing at Felix’s drawing again. “Your princess has a dress that needs to be finished. How else will she get married?”
Jeongin hummed, joining Seungmin in the story. “Without a dress and her flowers, she won’t be ready for her guests.”
Felix gasped, Chan’s words forgotten in the back of his head. He eagerly took one of the light pink markers to continue working on the princess’ dress.
“Good boy.” Jeongin mumbled, placing a kiss on top of Felix’s head. He beamed, leaning into the man’s embrace. They were technically not supposed to be out here — it was still far too cold to spend much time outside, but Felix had asked for it. And, he had quickly learned, his caregivers couldn’t say no to him.
Not even after his breakdown. They didn’t send him away, nor were they harsh on him. Of course, once Felix came back to his own headspace, he apologised profusely with adult words, and explained why he had reacted the way he did. Weeks had passed since then, the days flying by like they had before. They now had several more boxes filled to the brim with LEGO’s, allowing the Littles to build to their heart's content without worrying.
According to the calendar, December would start next week. The knowledge sat deep in Felix’s chest, keeping his heart warm. He had been with the Bangs for more than two months, and he was happy.
Over the past two weeks, though, the caregivers had become more protective. They were with Felix more, even when he was in his adult headspace. They talked to him about his life before, eager to learn what it was that Felix had gone through. Suddenly, Felix’s eyes widened. He dropped the marker and turned to Jeongin. “Are daddies going to do something bad?”
Jeongin frowned, “What do you mean, Lixie?”
“You — the mean people! That hurt me! Are you going to hurt them too?”
“Sunshine,” Hyunjin joined suddenly, his phone now gone. “That’s not for you to worry about.”
Felix looked at Seungmin and Jeongin, who nodded at him, before turning to Hyunjin. “But — but what if daddies get hurt, too?”
“We won’t.” Changbin replied in Hyunjin’s place, wrapping an arm around Hyunjin’s shoulders. Felix reached for them both, taking their hands in his. “We promise.”
“But—”
“Baby,” Hyunjin pouted, kneeling down to get on eye-level with Felix. In a standing position, Felix had to look up at Hyunjin all the time. With him sitting down and Hyunjin still standing, it made their height difference even worse. “Everything will be fine, okay? No one can hurt us, or you ever again.”
“Or I’ll hurt them!” Jisung exclaimed, making Felix giggle. He looked ridiculous, his cheeks puffed up and brandishing his marker as a weapon. “No one hurts Lixie.”
Felix looked back at Hyunjin, nodding. “Okay. Promise?”
Hyunjin nodded, “We promise, baby.”
After the last phone calls were brought to a close, Felix was scooped up by an eager Minho and Jisung lifted up and out of his seat by Jeongin. The eight of them made their way inside, to the playroom. It looked more like a living room, though rather than having hard wooden floors, the entire floor consisted of soft tiles — those one could find in an indoor playground.
Felix held onto Minho, waiting for the older to sit down so he could sit down on his lap. Minho allowed it, wrapping his arms around Felix’s waist and pulling him close. “Daddy Minho?”
Minho hummed, “What is it, baby?”
“Are you happy?”
“Sunshine,” Chan sat down next to them, raising an eyebrow. “Why do you ask us that?”
“Because,” Felix pouted, huffing. “Because Lixie came and you could — you could have gotten anyone?”
Something in Chan’s eyes flashed, and he shook his head. “Baby boy. We chose you because we thought you would fit perfectly with us. And our minds haven’t changed.”
“But—”
“No buts,” Minho whispered. Jisung lay on Changbin’s chest now, eyes closed and hands curled into fists. Jeongin, Hyunjin and Seungmin sat together, entangled with one another on the other couch. The television played a cartoon — Felix hadn’t even noticed it being turned on — and the room was peaceful. Lovely. “You belong with us.”
“Forever?”
“Forever.” Chan replied, taking one of Felix’s hands and kissing it gently. “And no one will hurt you again.”
Felix hummed, “because you’re going to hurt the mean people.”
That made Chan’s smirk return, the one Felix had seen several times while the man did business. On the first night, Felix had thought them to be intimidating — and they were, for other people. They put up a front, to keep up their reputation. If the world, especially the underworld, knew how the Bangs behaved in their home, around their Littles, they would become easy targets. Be called softies, and be written off. “Mean people deserve to get hurt, don’t they, baby?”
Felix took a deep breath. Chan wasn’t wrong, per se. He nodded. “They do, daddy.”
“Good,” Chan’s smirk turned into a smile. “That’s good. Now, take a nap baby.”
Felix pouted again, but closed his eyes. For the first few nights in the mansion, Felix had slept in his own room — the one where Hyunjin had done his hair, where Felix had realised that these men were different. After almost a week, though, they had offered him a place in their bedroom. And, well, Felix had taken it.
They now slept in a large room with a custom-made bed that fit all of them. It was comically large, but Felix loved being able to spend his nights with his people. Over the past two months, they had become more than his caregivers. They were friends now, and perhaps, in a while, they would grow comfortable enough to be partners, too. It had been in the contract, but so far, none of them had tried to make such a move. Part of Felix wanted them to, but the other part appreciated the time he had been given.
“He’s precious.” Someone whispered, Felix’s mind too far gone to figure out who.
“An angel.”
“Sunshine.”
“Our baby.”
*
“Lix,” Changbin cleared his throat, putting down his glass of wine. All eight of them sat around the large dining table, different main and side dishes scattered across the wooden surface. For the first time in a while, Jisung and Felix were in their adult headspace during dinner, their plastic plates replaced by the same ones the others used all the time. They still sat next to each other, though, something that Jisung always demanded when they were Little during meal times. “We want to ask you a question.”
Felix raised an eyebrow. He took a bite of his piece of steak, the way it was prepared allowing for a small amount of blood to join the meat as he chewed. All eyes were on him, suddenly, and he couldn’t help but shift in his seat. “What?”
“You can have time to think about it.” Chan continued for Changbin, easily taking the lead like he did during many other occasions. It was the most comfortable for Felix. He relaxed a little. “But — would you want to be romantically involved with us?”
“I—” Felix opened and closed his mouth much like a fish, eyes growing wide. Consent was important in this household — it slotted perfectly into place along the way each and every single one of them treasured honesty and candour — but Felix had expected this to go differently. Perhaps for one of them to kiss him, and things to progress naturally. This — this was definitely not what he had in mind. “That—”
“Calm down, Lix.” Jisung swooped in, placing a hand over Felix’s and squeezing. “I’ve been through this.”
“You— how— what?”
“Do you think they didn’t ask me this?” Jisung scoffed, shaking his head. “They may be kings of the underworld here, but they’re respectful.”
“Hey.” Minho interjected, smirking. “Not just here — in many places.”
“Fine,” Jisung stuck out his tongue before turning back to Felix. The rest of the group stayed quiet, clearly sensing that they should shut up. “It’s all about trust, which we have built with you. And as far as we’re aware, you trust us, too?”
“Of course.” Felix rushed to answer, “With my life.”
Not a single word of that was a lie. Felix’s cheeks heated up as Jisung smiled at him. “Good. That’s good. But yeah — this has to be calculated. Because all eight of us are in this together, we can’t just do things without talking about them.”
“He sounds so mature.” Hyunjin grinned, before gasping. “Ouch!”
“Hey—” Chan’s eyes flashed, “Jisung.”
“Fine, fine.”
“You may be in your adult space now, but you’re still our submissive.” Minho spoke, “And that means you have to behave.”
Jisung sighed, though it sounded more dramatic than necessary. Felix couldn’t help but smile a little. “So — how would this work?”
“Well,” Chan mused, “We would start being more romantic with you. At everyone’s own pace, of course.”
“Would I become your submissive too?” Felix asked, finally speaking the words that he had wanted to for so long. Ever since reading them in the contract, really. “Like Jisung?”
“If you want to.” Chan replied, folding his hands on his lap. “It’s in the contract, but that was never as intense as it was written down. We would love to have you as our submissive, lover and Little, but that is all up to you.”
Felix nodded. The ball was in his court now, but he didn’t need to think about it. After his time here, the way they cared for him no matter what headspace he was in, no matter what he did, he wanted more. He wanted to be loved by them in a way only lovers could, wanted to become one with all of them as soon as possible. “I would love to.”
Smiles broke out on all of their faces, sending sparks of anticipation and warmth down Felix’s entire body. “I’ll be good to you. For you.”
“Oh, there’s no doubt about that.”
The smiles turned into smirks briefly, all of them eager. Felix felt it, too, the tension rising to the surface. But, no one did anything. Instead, they all returned to their meals — Jisung sitting a lot closer, suddenly — and regular conversations picked back up again. Felix smiled to himself, down at his plate.
His old Mistress had been right after all — he belonged with the Bangs.