Work Text:
Maybe Loona had made Bee think she didn't like her or something, because she'd started giving her candy all the time.
Ugh, fuck, maybe she's picked up Loona's stupid crush on her boyfriend and Loona's jealousy. Which wasn't exactly fucking fair, if Loona was just radiating bitter vibes about it. It wasn't her fault she and Vortex were dating before Loona had even met her.
And it wouldn't even be a big fucking deal, if Loona weren't always trying to hang out with Vortex, and Bee was always there.
Because now Loona was— Oh, fuck, were they making fun of her? Making a point of how she was always hanging around, third-wheeling them?
Or maybe it was some joke about how she and Blitzø were too poor not to accept free food.
Fuck. Just when she thought she might be starting to like Bee too.
"Hey! Happy Valentine's Day! Total commercialized crap holiday for someone who went up instead of down, but hey, an excuse for candy, right?" Bee said cheerfully, holding out a box of heart-shaped candy to Loona.
"No thanks," Loona said.
Bee snapped her fingers and a red heart-shaped lollipop appeared between them. "Better?"
Loona shook her head and made to turn on her paw.
"How 'bout this?" Bee snapped a platter of white chocolate covered strawberries into existence.
"I said no thank you," Loona said, and felt like she was going to snart snarling any fucking second.
"Okay. Did something happen?" Yeah. You— "I mean, you always accepted my offerings before, and I'm just wondering if I misremembered—"
"Fuck off, Bee," Loona growled after that first clause.
God, Bee really thought she was stupid, didn't she? And doing this on Valentine's was fucking cruel.
(Loona wasn't going to unpack why exactly she felt that way right now. Right now, she just wanted to cry, and she was not doing that in front of Bee.)
Bee blinked. "Oh. Um. Okay. I was just— nevermind, I guess. Have a good Valentine's, Loona."
"Loony? Who was that?" Blitzø called from his office, avoiding his feelings about Valentine's by working through it instead of working through them.
"Nobody important," Loona called back. "I'm taking a break."
"Loony sweetie I need you on the phone this is one of our busiest days of the year," Blitzø called from the office all in one go.
"Cool. I'm taking a break," Loona said before pushing back her chair and heading to her room.
"Yeah well it's near the end of the work day anyway," Blitzø said, again all one fluid thing, like he was giving her permission instead of Loona just doing her thing. "Sweetie is everything OK?"
"I'M FINE!" Loona yelled as she shut her door.
"Yelled like someone who's definitely fine," Blitzø grumbled. Well, he really did have to get going for another mission with M&M; it really was one of their busiest days of the year.
"Hey", Vortex texted her.
Loona started typing a response, then deleted it.
"Bee told me things didn't go well
I get it if this makes things awkward with us but I hope you still have a good Valentine's"
Loona was feeling cruel and petty and hurt and doesn't get what fucking game they're playing with her, but she didn't want to play anymore. She didn't respond.
Instead she just curled up on the bed and tried not to think of Bee; or Vortex; or the cute date they're probably going on today, or already went on; or how good those strawberries looked.
Loona wasn't always in the kennel system.
She got adopted, once.
They sent her back, after a while. They wanted an easier dog. The picture perfect little girl for their family, or something.
Someone asked her to prom that year.
No-one had ever done that for her, obviously, because of the whole kennel system situation.
Loona had been so excited. For a moment she was thinking of what dress she would wear, and how she'd actually try, and—
—and then it had been a joke.
(And then she got sent back after that particular meltdown.)
(She never fucking lived it down either. Everyone at school had tormented her about it afterward. Maybe it was for the best she got transferred after that anyway.)
Loona hated that fucking feeling. And she didn't like feeling like Bee and Vortex were pulling something similar— laughing at her while they mess with her. She didn't know what sick game this was, but she was so done with it.
Like something twisted in her stomach whenever Bee did that shit. Unfortunately, the way she liked Vortex wasn't something she has a choice about, but she's aware he's gotta be in on it, he's her boyfriend.
This was stupid as shit. Vortex worked for Verosika, and Blitzø had his issues with her. What the fuck was she even doing here?
After the sound of Blitzø and M&M hopping through the portal, Loona decided to mess around on her phone in bed for a bit before going back to the work phone.
She opened Sinstagram, and there was a picture of Bee eating chocolates from a heart-shaped box, Vortex at her side, with the caption "You fucking WISH you were me…"
Loona closed the app, scrubbed a paw over his face, and went back to the desk. Maybe she could at least be useful for Blitzø today. Busiest day of the year and all or whatever.
Feb 15
"Hey" (delivered 7:38 am)
"Bee's having another party on the weekend" (delivered 7:39 am)
"It's cool if you don't want to come" (delivered 7:39 am)
"But you're still welcome to" (delivered 7:39 am)
"Just let me know" (delivered 7:40 am)
(Read 9:50 am)
Loona typed out and deleted various responses. "Fuck off." "No." "Why would I want to?"
But the truth was that Loona did want to be there. She wanted to hang out with Vortex, and pretend like things with Bee didn't make things terminally, irreparably weird between them.
Is it a Valentine's party? Loona texted, just for something to say, unwilling to give a yes or no just yet.
Read almost immediately.
Then a typing bubble popped up and went away a few times until she got a message that read Yeah. Weekend bash kinda thing I guess.
"I feel like an asshole", Loona typed, deleted, retyped, paused, finished typing, backspaced, then typed out fully again. "I was really rude to bee." But she makes me feel really small which is funny because— Loona was not typing that, and she certainly wasn't sending it. Instead, she just hit send before she could agonize over it anymore.
"Yeah. She told me a little bit about what you said. But she said it's fine if I invited you.
We're not one person yk"
"I know"
And Loona decided she'd go. Figure out what the vibes were.
Apparently all of I.M.P. was invited. Loona wasn't sure if that was to make it less personal, and she didn't want to be weird about it, so she'd said she'd ask them. Blitzø had said yes immediately, before she could put out the vibes he'd rather he didn't, but hey, it could be good to have the getaway van there at the ready. Millie thought that a party with a major Sin sounded like an incredible time, and anywhere Millie went, Moxxie went, so they were apparently all going.
Great. Cool, cool, cool.
Well, Loona would have her support system there, that was for sure.
"Hey! Loona! Glad you came!" Vortex said.
"Touch her and I'll fucking kill you," Blitzø said blithely before waltzing further into the party.
"He's joking," Loona said.
"No he isn't," said Moxxie.
"Moxxie!" Millie admonished. "He's just… a little intense," she said in her thick Wrathian accent, "where Loona is concerned. Just be good to her," she said cheerfully, "or we'll help him do it."
"Great. Thanks guys. Really helpful," Loona said dryly.
"You're welcome," said Moxxie before the part of his brain that recognized he was being mocked kicked in.
Millie giggled, grabbed his hand, and cheered "Let's go meet a Major Sin!"
And then they were all swallowed up by the crowd, leaving Loona with Vortex.
"So, um…" Vortex said.
"What the fuck is going on with your girlfriend and you and me?" Loona blurted.
Vortex sighed. "Is this a conversation you should be having with Bee instead of me?"
"Is it?" Loona replied haughtily.
"Is this about us or about her?"
"I don't fucking know!" Loona snapped.
"Look, this is weird enough as it is, but she feels really awkward about—" Bee felt awkward about it? Loona's the one who— "…and I don't want to be put in the middle," Vortex was saying when Loona came back from inside her own head.
"…Yeah, I get that," Loona said after a bit. "Do you wanna dance?" Loona said after a pause.
"Honestly, Loona, I… I want this party to be a peace offering, I do, but you were shitty to my girlfriend. And however you feel or don't feel is fine, is whatever, but you… you don't get to act like that didn't happen."
It's what Blitzø always did, and Loona hasn't really had another person to model after. But that doesn't mean Vortex isn't right.
"You're right," Loona said and clenched her paws before letting them go. "Hey. I can leave. Round up my dad and M 'n' M too. It's not a big deal."
"I just said I want this party to be a peace offering, Loona," Vortex said, some exasperation spilling into his voice. "I don't want you to leave."
"You also don't want to dance with me!"
"Not when you're acting like what happened didn't happen!"
"It's a party!" Loona shouted. "You're supposed to dance! And I don't know anyone here except for you!" An unspoken And Bee hung in the air between them.
"You're also supposed to talk," Vortex pointed out. "But we can dance."
Loona didn't actually feel like dancing, but she wasn't going to just stand to the side eating Bee's food.
She's had enough of that, clearly.
And it probably would have been awkward but fine, if Bee hadn't called out to him from across the room.
"Go," Loona said.
Vortex made a pained face.
"Go. Go. Go," Loona said with a shooing motion. "It's fine."
"I—"
"We'll talk later. Go be with your girlfriend. It's Valentine's."
Vortex was still looking at her like this hurt him, so she yelled "Go!"
"I'll catch you later," he said and went to her.
Okay, actually, if Loona was on her own now, she was getting at least something to drink. Fuck this.
Moxxie came up to the punch bowl shortly after Loona poured herself a drink.
"Where's Millie?" Loona asked.
"What do you mean?" Moxxie asked.
"You're always together. Where's Millie?" Loona asked, not because she really cared, but because she wanted a distraction.
"Hitting it off with some Hellhound ladies. She's great at parties." Somewhere far off at the party, glass shattered and cheering whoops sounded. "A riot."
"Cool," Loona said.
"What about you? Having fun at the party?" Moxxie said, getting himself some snacks.
"No," Loona said.
The moment hung between them, punctuated by the loud baseline, until Moxxie said "Wanna talk about it?"
"Yeah," Loona said.
And so she told him all of it. How Bee had started giving her so much candy and apparently she hadn't been paying attention because she's apparently gotten a little chubby, how she had a crush on Vortex, his Bee made her feel weird too, like this was all a trap, like they were both in on something and laughing at her, how she didn't know what to do…
And every time she looked at Moxxie for help, he'd taken a drink.
Which she hadn't paid much attention to, but he was a small imp, not a tall Hellhound.
So maybe she shouldn't have been so surprised when he fell in the giant punch bowl after he tried to lean in and fill his cup again.
"Millie?" Loona called automatically, like she always did when there was cause for Moxxie extraction. "Millie!"
"Nooo," whined Moxxie on his back. "I want—" hic! "for Millie to see I can hold my liquor."
Yeah, alright, that did it. She wasn't fishing him out. Millie was seeing this.
"Millie! Come get your idiot husband out of the punch bowl! MILLIE!"
Fortunately, she wasn't far away, so Loona managed to flag her down.
Once Millie fished him out and had him set on a chair, Millie asked Loona "What happened?"
She told her the condensed version, and Millie said "That's it. You're talking to them."
"No, Millie, I—"
"Uh-uh. You three need to have a conversation."
"Millie, please, it's Valentine's—"
"All the better for you to work out your feelings!"
"Millie," Loona protested.
"Sweetheart. You said this girl tried to give you candy hearts, a heart shaped lollipop, and white-chocolate covered strawberries on Valentine's. And you think she doesn't like you."
Loona just opened her mouth and stared at her.
"Girl, you know we love you, but you're dumb as shit sometimes," Millie said. "BEE! Where'd Bee fly off to?"
"She has a boyfriend," Loona protested.
"Yeah, who you also like," Millie countered. "BEE!"
"You stay here and make sure Moxxie doesn't drown himself. I'm getting Bee." It wasn't a question or a request.
Millie disappeared into the party, and Loona sat down next to Moxxie. "You heard the woman. No more drinks for you." Beezlejuice was strong.
"Okay," Moxxie said. "Why didn't you ask Blitzø for help?" Moxxie asked.
"Because he's an idiot who doesn't know shit about relationships, and he's currently shitfaced, and he's weird about even the idea of anybody fucking me." There was a moment in which the fact that Moxxie was also currently shitfaced hung heavy. "I dunno, you asked and you and Millie seem happy together or whatever," Loona said with a shrug.
"Yeah," Moxxie said dreamily. "We are."
Great. Love was in the air. And pretty soon Loona's vomit would be if they lingered here too long. M&M were nauseatingly domestic, and Loona's tolerance for that shit was fairly low. She got enough of it at work.
Millie returned with Bee and— oh, fuck— Vortex in tow.
"Two fer one!" Millie said cheerily as she pushed them out toward Loona. "I found them together. Now you kids talk to each other, alright? I'm gonna get my soaking wet husband some dry clothes from the van. You better have worked something out by the time I come back, ya hear?" Millie said, sternly but brightly.
She gave them a wave and picked Moxxie up, taking him to the van.
Everyone just stared at each other for a second. Then Bee said "Well this is awkward," Vortex said "I'm still not sure why I'm here," and Loona said "Sorry my coworkers are Like That" all at the same time, and froze.
Loona had stood up when Millie had pulled them into view, but she realized she didn't want to do this conversation standing. Actually, no, she didn't want to do this conversation somewhere with music this loud.
"Can we do this outside?" she asked.
Vortex shrugged, Bee nodded, and so outside they went.
The backyard was sprawling and gorgeous, and had a pool easily fifteen times the size of the kennel Loona had shared with someone else when Blitzø had adopted her. The backyard alone was bigger than the building I.M.P was in.
Fuck, what the fuck was Loona doing here?
Vortex walked out to a spot on the grass and sat down. He patted a spot next to him for Bee, and she joined him. Loona sat down next to them, obviously not as close to either of them as Bee and Vortex were.
Loona took a breath and started to say "So…", but Bee burst out "It's cool if you don't want to date me but I thought we were friends and you don't get to be shitty to me just because you don't want to go out with me."
"…What?" Loona said slowly.
"Like, I get it, you'd have to be a) polyamorous b) into girls and c) into me specifically, but you don't have to be an asshole about it. You could have just said 'no,' and I would have backed off."
"What are you talking about?" Loona said.
"I asked you out—"
"No," Loona said, "you didn't."
"Uh, because you told me to fuck off before I could even get to officially asking?" Bee said.
Loona blinked. "You were asking me out?"
"Yes. Duh. Obviously."
"No! Not obviously!" Loona snapped.
"Loona," Bee said, "I showed up to your work near closing time on Valentine's Day to give you candy hearts, a heart-shaped lollipop, and white-chocolate covered strawberries. What did you think was happening?"
"That you're making fun of me," Loona said, heated.
"Why?!"
"You have a boyfriend! Who is very much sitting next to you right now!"
"Girl, we are openly poly," Bee said.
Loona opened and closed her mouth, then said "I didn't know that."
"It's not like it has to come up," Vortex threw in.
"You," Loona snarled at him. "You knew?"
"Uh, yeah? Again, not sure how else you could have interpreted that, and I got told you were a dick to my girlfriend, which I thought was out of line, but… um, so, anyway, now we're here."
"Now we're here," Loona said, staring down the lawn.
"Now we're here," Bee said. "And frankly, it's weird that you wanted to keep being friends with my boyfriend like you weren't just a massive dick to me, but like, I guess that's why he's here too."
"You guys are fucking with me," Loona said.
"No! We're not! And it's weird and shitty of you to act like we are!" Bee snapped.
"No! It's not! And it's weird and shitty of you to act like it is!" Loona shot back. "You," Loona leveled at Bee, "are a Major Sin. Who has a boyfriend. Who is really fucking pretty." Loona turned to Vortex and said "And you," she pointed at him, "are dating her." She turned more back to Bee. "So you two are always gonna outnumber me."
"Um, just because Bee and I were dating first doesn't mean we'd have priority forever and ever, but that's, uh, I mean, if you- if you did want to date either of us it wouldn't necessarily mean Bee and I were the closest ones forever," Vortex said, tripping over his words.
"Either of us?" Loona blinked, wondering if she'd really heard that correctly.
"This is a joke," Loona said, feeling miserable. "This is some really weird, really mean joke." She wrapped her arms around her knees and tried not to think about her tummy pressing against her thighs. A really mean joke.
"Loona, it's not. And I'd appreciate you not treating my girlfriend's feelings that way, or our relationship style," Vortex said, still collected, but evidently frustrated.
"You guys are fucking with me," Loona said, squeezing down on herself and trying not to cry. "And when I say 'really? You mean it? I have a chance with you?' you're going to think it's so fucking funny I fell for it."
"No-one's laughing, Loona," Vortex said and tentatively placed a hand on her back. When she didn't pull away, she started rubbing her shoulders. "Actually, I think we're all, uh, all pretty stressed out right now," he said with a bit of a nervous laugh.
"You're stressed out?! You guys—" Loona cut herself off and took a breath. "Look, I know my crush on Vortex has probably been, like, embarrassingly obvious, but if you wanted me to spend less time with him, there were easier and less shitty ways to do that," Loona said.
"Uh, nobody said that," Vortex said. "Can you please listen to what we're actually saying instead of the conversation you're having with the versions of us you made up?" That stopped Loona in her tracks.
"…Okay."
"See, I told you she had a crush on you," Bee said, humor coming through her voice despite how… honestly, really sad she sounded.
"Yeah, but I didn't want her to feel, like, unicorn-ambushed, which is… this is probably the worst way this could have gone down to avoid that," Vortex said, unable to look at Loona directly. "And anyway, your dad is… really intense? About you, and I work for his ex, and I work a lot of hours when I go on tour or some shit, and I already have a girlfriend. I didn't want to ask you out and leave you feeling like you're begging for scraps."
Loona barely had time to process that apparently both of them had actually known and she hadn't in fact just outed that about herself before Vortex hit her with that "begging for scraps" line.
All her fucking life, before Blitzø adopted her, Loona's felt like she's supposed to be happy with scraps. All her fucking life, the entire time she was in the kennel system.
And Vortex, the guy she's been obviously crushing on for months now, just said he didn't ask her out because he didn't want her to feel that way.
She doesn't know how to feel about that right now.
And the sense that this is all some really elaborate, fucked up joke is unshakeable.
"What the fuck was with the candy?" Loona blurted.
"Um. Sin of Gluttony? Hello?" Bee said. "I thought you liked me, because you visibly accepted everything I gave you, but whatever, guess I misread that."
"…visibly?" Loona asked, dreading the answer.
"Oh, yeah, I mean, if you take enough candy from me that it shows, I tend to figure that means you like me back, but like, whatever, I get it: Sin of Gluttony, right? What I make's the best, so… yeah. Whatever. I get it," Bee said with a shrug.
The realization that Bee had in fact done that on purpose but for an entirely different reason that Loona had been spinning in her head (malice) was… a lot.
"Bee apparently likes to wait until her crush has a double-chin or something before asking them out; I just asked her first," Vortex supplied. "And lift. So… yeah."
"You guys," Loona said with a nervous humor, "are really fucking weird about asking someone out."
"You're really fucking weird about getting asked out!" Bee shot back.
Loona sprawled on her back. "I really did think you were making fun of me."
"Well, I wasn't," Bee said.
After a moment, Loona said "What now?"
"Uh, kind of depends on you," Bee said. "I am cool with just being friends, and if you don't want to, if it's just… awkward now that I've asked you, or something, we don't have to be. But I mean, the whole point is that I like you and like spending time with you, so if you just wanna be friends, friends is good."
"…you're not mad I have a crush on your boyfriend?"
"What part of 'polyamorous' isn't clicking?" Bee said. "And no, by the way. Also, if I was mad about that, I would have been mad about that like, months ago, not now."
"…Okay," Loona said. "Do we just pretend I didn't say that part then?"
Vortex shifted a bit in the grass before saying "That is, uh, also up to you."
"Okay."
Loona came from her date with Vortex and found a mountain of cotton candy in the office.
"Blitzø? What do I do with this?" Loona said as she spotted little candies in the shape of bees dotted in the tufts of cotton candy.
"You eat it, dumbass," Blitzø said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Maybe it was.