Chapter Text
"Just get over it," Jungkook mutters, frowning at the eggs frying in the scalding pan in front of him.
We agreed on no attachments he reminds himself silently, nibbling at his lip ring.
He woke up to a silent apartment this morning, meaning his roommate isn’t here which is nice because he had caught a glimpse of himself in the bathroom mirror this morning and the purple marks on his neck would definitely not go unnoticed by his roommate and he isn't in the mood for another one of their "are you two together or not" conversations.
(Definitely isn't in the mood for the long winded lecture slash worried monologue if his roommate saw Yoongi who will be no doubt exiting Jungkook's room any time now.)
The answer to that question used to be simple. Not too long ago Jungkook, without sparing much thought and little hesitation, could answer easily that they're just friends. Just hooking up. Just- just.
But now... what used to be simple has gradually become less so. It’s become complicated in a way Jungkook both likes and loathes.
Things have shifted enough that it made it impossible for a small spark of hope not to gradually burn brighter and brighter until it was harshly extinguished by the whispers he'd unintentionally heard from the other side of the bookshelf in the University's library.
It was Yoongi who was speaking, Jungkook would know his voice anywhere, and he was talking to someone. That person's voice Jungkook hadn't recognized.
"So are you and that Jeon kid dating or what's going on there?" The stranger had inquired.
Yoongi took a moment to answer before clearing his throat and saying, "We fuck but it's nothing serious. It's casual."
Jungkook's stomach sank when the next thing out of the strangers mouth is him waxing poetic about how toned Jungkook's ass is and asking Yoongi if it's as nice bare as it looks in his jeans and Yoongi– fucking Yoongi– instead of sticking up for Jungkook and telling this guy not to say such vulgar things about Jungkook he simply confirmed what his friend was wondering, laughing conspiratorially along with him.
Jungkook was embarrassed and angry but most of all he was hurt. Hurt and upset because- well, because he'd gotten his hopes up that things were changing.
That what was once casual was becoming less so.
That Yoongi sleeping over and inviting Jungkook to do the same at his place meant something.
That Yoongi asking him to go to dinner with his fucking parents when they came to visit him because he wanted someone there to support him when he told them he was switching majors meant something.
(Who the hell introduces their situationship to their parents anyway? Jungkook cuts himself some slack for the reading into he's done into that particular situation.)
That Yoongi not reacting negatively– or at all really– to Jungkook and Yoongi's mother exchanging numbers with the intention to go antique shopping, one of her favorite hobbies, together next time they’re in the city when she'd found out Jungkook collected old cameras meant something.
That it meant Yoongi saw him as someone more than a hook up. That it meant he might actually entertain the idea of being with Jungkook seriously.
Jungkook thought it all meant more. That Yoongi thought better of him, but apparently not.
Yoongi still sees him as a guy he fucks on the weekends.
Nothing has changed.
"No attachments" Yoongi's smooth and serious voice echoes in his mind.
Jungkook hates that he's upset about this. That he's so bitter. That he isn't actually as chill and care free, as unattached, as he portrays.
But he is attached. He knows he is. And he hates himself for it.
Hates himself for getting into this situation. For ever agreeing to sleeping together. For letting it go on for so long.
Hates himself for so foolishly falling-
"That smells good," a voice calls over his shoulder, breaking him out of his spiraling thoughts as muffled footsteps enter the kitchen from behind.
Jungkook tries not to flinch when a pair of strong arms wrap around his waist.
Tries to keep his voice from trembling when he says that Yoongi's welcome to stay for breakfast.
Tries not to show his disappointment when the invitation is declined with a vague excuse of needing to head to his place to get ready to meet up with a friend.
The friend from the library? Jungkook wants to ask but bites his tongue.
Jungkook doesn't walk him to the door after he pulls away before heading for his shoes that are by the front door.
Doesn't say goodbye when he hears the front door open and close.
Doesn't abandon the food to run after him and pull Yoongi in for one last kiss like he annoyingly aches to do.
He doesn't do any of that because that would be too much. Too emotional. Too clingy. Not casual at all.
And casual is all they are after all.