The Awkward Moment I Became an Overlord

by TTGirlFan

Summary:

After a mishap on the flight deck, Sojourner Knight finds herself in the eternal damnation of Hell, on extermination day of all days. After getting her tail saved, this sailor does her best to live life as normally as possible. However, it seems fate has other plans for Sojourner. Between accidentally becoming the Devil’s therapist, becoming a top overlord, and a prime target of Heaven, it makes sense she’s meant to be down there right? But the main question no one in Heaven or Hell can figure out is: What the hell is she doing down here in the first place?

Notes:

Yoooooo, what up babes? So this is my first fic I’ve written ever, and obviously the first one I’ve ever posted. I was inspired by of course Vivziepop’s amazing two series: Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss and I love all the characters! However, I was inspired to create Sojourner after I saw @RecklessRae1’s take on Michael as well as @Reminaoo’s take on Michael as well. So lots of credit to them, go check out their work on Bluesky and X.

Next, I have military experience, I obviously won’t get into it much because I’m not allowed to but I do know what I’m talking about. I have changed things on purpose, I have made inaccuracies on purpose. I respect all branches of the military, I am using my experiences with said branches to poke fun at the stereotypes, it is all in good fun. If you have an issue please privately DM and we can address it like adults.

Alright have fun, I don’t know what I’m doing! :D

Chapter 1: Blow the Man Down

Summary:

Meet Sojourner Knight, aviation electrician's technician on board the aircraft carrier, The Flying Dutchman. She's on the flight deck going through what should be a typical day.

Date: August 16, 2018

Age: 30

Location: North Persian Sea (I know this is not a real place, please hush its fiction)

Weather: 90* Sunny with a beautiful, breeze and a delicious mist from the water

Current Conditions: Third go of the day and Aviation Electric Technician First Class (AV1) is on the fantail

AV1 Sojourner Knight loves days like these, muscle memory guiding her through the dangerous dance of aircrafts, maintainers, and Neptune’s kingdom below. Watching with pride as the sailors she trained, race their jets to the catapults, performing final checks before they throw their thumbs in the air and the metal chariots take to the skies. Indeed, it is the simple things like these that make life worthwhile.

AV1 considers herself a simple person, with simple likes. For example, she likes music, cats, and tinkering. The same can be said for dislikes, she dislikes bugs (they have scritchy legs), bullies (mean), and sharp noises (they give her gnarly headaches). As AV1 encounters new experiences, she simply decides whether she likes it or dislikes it. In fact, she has decided, just now, that falling headfirst off the flight deck fucking BLOWS.

Notes:

I have never fallen off the flight deck. I have, however, eaten complete shit on the flight deck and it sucks so hard, non-skid is no joke.

Fan-tail: ass- end of the aircraft carrier
Go: aircraft are on and ready to take off on the catapult
Recovery: All the aircraft have landed and are now being parked

The Dutchman to my knowledge is not an aircraft carrier.

Chapter 2: Head on a Swivel

Summary:

Sojourner wakes up in someplace new. Where the hell is the water?

Notes:

The color green means Sojourner is a maintainer or troubleshooter. She is able to fix problems on the spot or well enough for the aircraft (A/C) to make its launch. Maintainers and troubleshooter usually carry a tool pouch on their hip. Google Top gun opening scene

Basic breakdown of flight deck gear

Cranial: a helmet with noise reducing headset and microphone piece. Secured on head with a Velcro strap

Float coat: Like a life jacket but it holds on to your stink. SUPPOSED to inflate when it makes contact with saltwater, has a blinking light beacon that could blind god and inflation tube that you inflate/ deflate manually

Jersey: a thick long-sleeve fire resistant shirt with your rank/ rate (job) on the left arm

Pants: sturdy and take a minute to wear down and rip, but with enough falls and trips, you can rip ‘em in no time.

Gloves: thick leather gloves to protect from high heat and pinching, makes writing reeeaaalllly difficult.

Boots: Steel toes to prevent damage from idiots that WILL run your toes over because they’re idiots, I’m not kidding a buddy of mine got ran over, he was fine just sore and pissed.

Date: August 16, 2018

Age: 30

Location: No Idea but It’s Loud as all Hell!

Weather: The hell is this? The FUCK ARE THOSE!?

Current Conditions: WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENI-

A fountain of slimy, warm saltwater erupts from Sojourner’s throat and lands back onto her mouth as her eyes snap open. An insufferable, high-pitch ringing is all she can hear as she stares stunned at the scene above her. A dark, red sky littered with ‘what in the actual fuck are those!?’ Flying, noir, she-pigeons with glowing, twisted smiles and ‘SPEARS?’ dart back and forth in the sky. Decrepit buildings limit her view, as a full dumpster presses against her right-side. Sojourner turns her head to look around but her green cranial stops the movement, her dark lens goggles pushing into her right eye. She readjusts, craning her neck past the dumpster to see a street at the long end of a narrow ‘Alleyway? Why the fuck am I in an alley?’ They nasty!’ Giving herself a moment to focus, she sees… carnage, it seems the best way to describe her limited view. Mangled bodies riddled with bleeding stab wounds lie still on the street. Arms strewn in deformed angles, legs separated from their twin, disembodied heads roll on the ground, indeed, it is carnage.

Sojourner stares in disbelief, unable to look away ‘The fuck is happening?’ the shock of it all freezing her in place. Silhouettes of ‘People? Creatures? Fuck are those things?’ run panicked. A figure falls into view landing hard on its back. One arm wildly trying to help the legs scoot back while the other is raised to the front, desperately trying to stop whatever is coming. Peeking out just beyond the wall, a tip of a spear appears, and the silhouette curls in on itself, screaming for help. Well, Sojourner assumes they’re screaming, but all she can hear is this damn ringing, ‘Shit!’ The spear angles down and Sojourner turns her head away, screwing her eyes shut. ‘Bitch, you dreamin’, wake yo’ ass up!’ She tells herself, ‘Wake. Up!’  She begins to hear noises off to the distance, but all she can tell is that there is danger nearby.

“YEEEEAAAAHHH!” A voice sings out. ‘Is that Steve Tyler? Am I at a concert right now?!’ Sojourner has so many questions. An explosion goes off in the distance, rumbling the ground beneath her, vibrating her bones. Okay, she needs to get up and away from here before those bird-people-things see her, like right now. Sojourner forces her body to move.

She goes to sit up, only to be pushed back down by her green float coat. ‘Damn thing inflated again!’ A bright, white flash blinds her right eye as her emergency light blinks to signal where she is in the water. ‘Water. Where’s the water? Where is the flight deck? Where in the fuck am I? Sojourner pinches the inflation straw hidden behind the upper flap near her right collarbone to release the trapped air. Crossing her arms, she hugs her torso and rolls side-to-side, forcing the air out of her float coat, her body finally touching the soggy ground.

She goes to sit up again, feeling slimy texture of her soaked, black leather gloves give between her fingers and press into her palms. Grimacing, she rolls to her hands and knees, suppressing a shudder as her soaked jersey clings to her body and warm water sloshes to the front of her steel toed boots. Bits of trash and gravel dig into her knees as she sits back on them. She grabs her beacon light and, with practiced precision, rubs the salt-water off the sensor. The light goes off as she stuffs it back into its respective pocket.

Leaning against the dumpster, Sojourner reaches up to take the bulky goggles off her face when it hits her, the smell. A rancid, putrid, and rotten odor mixed with a heated metallic tinge crawls down her throat, choking her. By reflex, Sojourner buries her face into the crook of her elbow and fights down a gag. The lurch of the dry heave forcing her back onto her hands and knees as more saltwater comes up, splashing into her hands, her darkened goggles begin to fog. She’s unable to catch her breath; she needs to move! Sucking in a deep breath, Sojourner launches herself from the ground and stumbles, slamming her shoulder into the opposite wall as she leans for its support.

Steadying her breath, she frantically looks for a way out. ‘The street is a no-go.’ Sojourner scans the alley, eyes landing on a door just beyond the dumpster. The screams of creatures dying, beating feathers, and Steve Tyler coming from all directions. Looking towards the street again, she sees the spear pigeon-thing standing up from its latest kill, slowly turning to her, its crooked mouth frowning. ‘Move. NOW!’ Sojourner forces her body to the door and grabs the handle. Turning and pulling hard, her arm flings back to her, with the damn knob in her hand.

“Oh, get fucked!!” Sojourner spits out as she stumbles back, eyes darting between the door, the knob, and the spear pigeon. A heavy dread sends a shudder throughout her body, heart dropping into her stomach. She backs away from the door as she locks eyes with the murder-chicken.

“Heeeey sugar, wh-what wheeze what’s good?” Sojourner asks in an overly sweet, wavering voice, taking clumsy steps backwards as the creature stalks towards her. “Y-you look like you’re ha-having fun, may- AHEM maybe time for a breather?” She doesn’t dare look away from her attacker.

The bird- thing picks up its pace, its head snap to a sickening right angle.

“Ayo” She deadpans, her eyes widening. It brandishes its spear, the fresh red blood glistens as some of the splatter drips down the now petrifying smile.

“A-YO, CHILL!” Sojourner screams out, partially clipping the back of her left hip against the dumpster as she turns to run. She feels something heavy pulling off her waist, falling with a heavy thud. She doesn’t look back as she takes off running, gripping the doorknob to her chest.

Notes:

Okay, so we in it. Let’s see how our girl fairs in the next chapter shall we?

Chapter 3: Brace for Shock

Summary:

Ooohh we in it now, will Sojourner be able to escape the spear-chicken? Or will she up like the poor bastard that got ran through? Let’s find out

Chapter 3 BRACE FOR SHOCK (IYKYK)

Date: August 16, 2018

Age: 30

Location: WHERE THE SHIT AM I!?

Weather: FUCK THAT, HELP ME

Current Conditions: THIS PIGEON-THING FINNA KILL ME

Sojourner hears the tip of the spear scrape against the brick wall as she picks up her pace. Her boots pound against the pavement as she blindly jumps over bags of trash and rubbish, desperately trying to escape. Sprinting further down the alley, she sees a left turn approaching. A torn bag tangles around her feet and sends her tumbling to the ground, the sound of the spear swiping where her head would have been. She lands hard on the ground, skidding, OOMPH and blindly rolls to her right, narrowly missing the spear again, a small spark jumps as the metal strikes the pavement. She scrambles to get back to her feet, using a pile of trash as leverage.

Gripping a torn bag in her hand, Sojourner spins and whips it at the snarling spear-pigeon HIIIIIISSSSHGN, sending garbage flying in its direction, using the momentum of the spin to start running again. She rounds the corner, her boots sliding on the thick slime that coats the alley, sending her crashing into the brick wall. Sojourner ignores the searing pain in her shoulder and takes off again, knowing that that thing is mere feet away. The alley leads out to the streets, the last place she wants to go but ‘What choice do I fuckin’ have?’ huff, huff, HUFF!

Sojourner pushes her legs to go faster, her lungs are dry and burn with each cycle of the hot air she pulls into her. The light of the street only a few feet away, when the bird-thing lands in front of her, cutting off her path. Sojourner skids to a halt as she lets out a choked yelp, “N-no… no way,” she whimpers, her whole body goes rigid. The creature saunters toward her like a predator that finally has worn out its prey.

“C’mon, no…” Sojourner pleads, her voice tight with tears and over-exertion. “Not like this man, no.”

It points its spear at her and laughs, its glowing face glitching as it chuckles darkly.

“Are.. are you laughing? YOU THINK THIS A GAME, BITCH?” Tears spill over, Sojourner feels her face grow hot with indignation. She is about to get skewered, and this fucking thing is getting its sick kicks?! “Fuck. You!” She screams, leaning into a readying stance, hands clenching into tight fists, squeezing the doorknob. She glances to the item then back to the creature, drawing her arm back. The spear-bird’s smile glitches again and lunges, and Sojourner pitches the doorknob with all the strength she can muster. A gruff voice calls from behind her, “BRACE FOR SHOCK!” It barks.

Instinctively, Sojourner leaps to the brick wall to her left, her cranial pressed against it as her arms brace on both sides of her head and her feet planted firmly shoulder-width apart, eyes screwed shut. A deafening blast goes off behind her, the shockwave slamming against her body causing her to wince. Before she can turn around to look at the now insanely bright scene, a heavy hand snatches her by the float coat, dragging her back into the alley.

“MOVE YOUR FEET SAILOR!” The voice orders pulling her away from the blinding light. “FOLLOW ME!”

Sojourner follows her rescuer, her body moving on its own as they approach the corner she just rounded. The rescuer pushes her in front them, “GREEN DOOR, PORT SIDE!” Sojourner turns the corner and sights the door, sprinting to it; she yanks it open and darts inside the dark room. She turns to see if her savior’s silhouette slide into view of the doorway.

“EAT THIS, FUCKER!” They snarl andlob whatever is in their hand, jumping inside and slamming the door behind them.

Another thunderous blast goes off as a bright light streams under the crack of the door ‘Flashbang’ A shrill howl cries out SCREEEEEEEE and quickly devolves into grunts of unbridled anger. She hears trash cans crash against the brick walls in the alley outside as venomous clicks and hisses move past the door. Sojourner holds her breath, her heart slams against her chest, the pulse of her blood roaring in her ears. ‘It’s right outside’, her body frozen in place as she stares at the crack below the door. Ch-chk the sound of a gun cocks is coupled with a low growl. They wait.

A bugle blares out, its call echoing through the alley, “ALL EXORCISTS RETURN TO BASE, REPEAT ALL EXORCISTS RETURN TO BASE!”

“FUCK YES, NICE WORK BITCHES! THAT ROOOOOOOOCKED!” Steve Tyler sings out, his praising words getting further and further away.

Silence. Sojourner cautiously releases the breath she is holding in a long, shuddering hiss. Still not daring to move or make a noise. Her sight still fixed on the crack below the door as her eyes adjust to the darkness.

“They’re gone, you can talk now.” A deep voice speaks, startling a sharp yelp out her. Sojourner’s hands fly to her mouth, clasping over any sound that might try to escape. She hears the voice chuckle, “I said they’re gone, relax, will ya?”

Heavy footsteps travel in the dark and click a light flickers on, illuminating a sizable workshop with cluttered shelves and three workbenches taking up the space. An old, wooden dining table to her left is covered in ammo, guns, and ‘grenades?’ A worn, green couch is sitting beyond the table in a comfortable looking lounge area with a recliner. Her eyes trail back to the owner of the workshop, with a ‘What. The. Fuck?’ German Shepard furry staring right at her.

Notes:

Brace for Shock: a term used when a projectile is inbound.

When I first heard Adam sing “AAAATTTTTACCK” It immediately reminded me of Steve Tyler and every other 80’s Rock/Metal singer, so hell yeah.

Hope y’all are liking this.

Onward!

Chapter 4: Oscar Flag

Summary:

Holy crap, she totally almost died back there. Whelp, its all good now, who’s the new guy?

Chapter 4 Oscar Flag

Date: August 16, 2018

Age: 30

Location: A workshop, I think

Weather: Idk, quit asking me, idgaf

Current Conditions: Tripping the heaviest of balls, there’s a furry in uniform talking right now

Sojourner stands with her mouth slightly agape, unable to process what she’s seeing at the moment. A six-foot tall German Shepard Animorph is now unzipping their tan bullet proof vest while stretching their neck from side to side, crick- CRACK. Sojourner dry heaves, she cannot stand the sound of bones popping.

“Hey! If you’re gonna do that, do it in the deep sink!” The German Shepard snaps as they unbuckle their helmet, shaking their head like, well, how like a dog would. They jam their thumb to the right side of the room; a rusty deep sink sits in the corner, the faucet leaks an occasional drip. “All fluids, body or otherwise go in there, or you are cleaning that shit up.” They toss their helmet onto the cluttered counter before shimmying off their vest.

“Well then, don’t do that shit.” Sojourner retorts, suppressing a shiver.

“Don’t do what?” GS asks, raising their eyebrow in confusion, hanging up the vest on the back of the door.

“Pop your joi-hurk” Sojourner attempts to reply as her stomach clenches tightly, she scrambles for the deep sink, spewing up more salt water. “Ugh, why saltwater?” She weakly asks herself, wiping her mouth on her still wet sleeve. She pauses and then takes a confused sniff higher up on her sleeve, “why am I soaked with mlem salt water?” She asks, turning to the GS, finally pulling her goggles off her face as she turns to lean on the sink. The release in pressure is welcome on her eyes, she rubs them.

“Prolly’ how ya died,” The GS yawns, pulling out a chair before sitting down heavily, the chair groans.

“Scuse me?” Sojourner asks, confident she is mishearing them.

“I said ‘That’s probably how ya died’.” The GS repeats, their voice strains as they reach down to untie a boot “Ya drowned.” They finish casually, as they start on their other boot. “Yer soaked and pukin’ up seawater, so it makes sense.”

“I’m not dead.” Sojourner snorts, unstrapping her cranial. “Between fighting that spear-beast and talking to an Animorph, pretty sure I’m trippin’ balls, but not dead.”

“The hell is an Animorph?” The GS asks confused, loosing his trousers from the blousing straps before pulling his boots off, placing them under the table. They sigh as they stretch and pop their toes, Sojourner gags again.

“It’s a book series abo-“ She starts, trying to steady herself.

“Ugh, fuckin’ pass.” The GS interrupts, letting their head fall over the back of the chair as their body melts into a relaxing pose. “And more importantly, yes, yer very much dead. And in Hell.” They finish lazily, crossing their ankles. “You still reek like the living, though that’ll wear off in a few hours.”

“I’m not dead!” Sojourner argues, she wipes a dribble of seawater off her lips.

“For cryin’ out lo- Look at yerself, ya stubborn broad!” The GS lifting their head to gesture behind her. “See for yerself, ya ain’t human no more!” Their head flops back over the chair.

Sojourner rolls her eyes and lets out an exasperating huff as she pivots around to see a mirror. She pauses, a face wearing her green cranial is staring back at her, but it’s not hers. Brown, velvety fur is covering the entirety of the face as a black nose sits on top of a protruding ‘Snout. That’s a snout.’ She slowly raises her hand to gently poke the nose, she feels her slimy, wet gloved finger push into her face. “Wha, huff what?” She breathes. Wide eyes with yellow sclera and two different colored irises, the right side green, the left, red, stare back at her, shocked.

She watches as shaking hands reach up and pull her cranial off her head, the Velcro strap repeats its annoying habit of snagging a braid cornrowed on side of her head, she winces as she pulls it free. The fuzzy figure in the mirror does the same, she cannot believe what she seeing. The hairstyle she braided only a day before sits on top of the reflection’s head. Dark navy blue hair, with red and green ‘are these wires?’ are pulled in a heavy, waterlogged bun. Studying the image’s feature a bit more, she blinks ‘Bear.’ She takes a step back, the mirror image mimicks her perfectly. Sojourner turns to the GS and points over her shoulder to the mirror, “That’s a bear.” She says, “A black bear.”

“Yup.” The GS confirms, loosening the sleeves on his uniform blouse before starting on the torso. “Black bear, black bear, what do you see?” They mockingly sing, snickering to themselves.

Sojourner isn’t listening, in fact, the GS’ voice suddenly sounds far away as she takes her new reality in. She leans back on the deep sink as her knees lose strength, she can feel the 1,000 yard-stare settling on her face, a rhythmic pulse begins to beat in her ears. The image of the fan tail, rapidly climbing away from her as her gloved hands reach back for it, her black polished boots just past her hands. Whoosh! Splash! Blrb-blrb-blrb. Darkness. “Holy shit,” She whispers. “I died.”

Chapter 5: Chesty Puller

Summary:

So, there’s a sentient German Shepherd furry that saved Sojourner’s life… well afterlife. Because baby girl is dead, what the funk happened today? Who is this guy?

UPDATE: here is a link to see what Sojo looks like Sojourner Knight

Notes:

Lewis “Chesty” Puller was a Marine Corps Legend, the most decorated Marine in history. He began his career in Haiti and Nicaragua and served in both WWII and the Korean War. Awarded five Navy Crosses and one Distinguished Career Cross. Man is an absolute badass, check him out.

P.S. He was also known for his large, thrusted-out chest, do with that what you will.

Date: August 16, 2018

Age: Dead

Location: The German Shepard’s Furry workshop

Weather: Stg, ask me one more time about the fuckin’ weather, I dare you.

Current Conditions: Once human now Hell-cursed black bear bc she fell off the flight deck and died.

“Not gonna go cryin’ on me, are ya?” The GS quips, crossing their arms across their broad chest. “‘Cause all that emotional crap ain’t my forte.” Their gruff voice snaps Sojourner out of her daze.

Sojourner looks up at them, a pang of annoyance crosses her face, “Do I look like I’m cryin’?” She dryly asks. With her free hand, she pulls out her soggy bun. Her braids fall down her shoulders, dripping sea water on to her boots. She places her cranial on the ground and pulls off her damp gloves, tossing them on top. She stares at her wet, furry hands with sharp claws as nails, lacing her fingers together to feel soft texture. Turning to lean over the sink, she rings out her loose braids, the sound of water slapping the drain. She turns on both the hot and cold water to a comfortable warm before sticking her head under the faucet, rubbing and squeezing under her cornrows to rinse out any saltwater. Letting the, what she hopes to be, fresh water run down her braids for a bit, Sojourner shuts the water of, ringing out her hair once more before securing it in a high ponytail.

“Yeah, go ahead, make yer’self at home.” The GS says sarcastically, watching as Sojourner unzips her float coat to hang over the sink.

“Way ahead of you, big guy.” Sojourner replies with a smirk, she hang her cranial on a hook nearby and begins rinsing off her gloves. “So, what do I call you anyway, Poochy? Lassie?” She teases, draping her gloves over her float coat.

“Funny gal, name’s Pultzer, Chester Pultzer.” The GS retorts with a smirk, Sojourner bites back a laugh, hearing the irony in his name. “The hell’s your name, Yogi? Pooh? Paddington?”

“Ooohh, clever boy does read!” Sojourner says with fake surprise, “and here I was thinking all you’re good is playing fetch!” She laughs, “My name is Sojourner Knight. Thank you for saving my life.” The last bit she says gently.

“Well seein’ how you handle shit, I had to step in.” Pultzer snorts “It’s pretty damn clear yer useless in a fight.” He stands up, stretching his back, letting out a loud groan.

“Fuck is that supposed to mean?” Sojourner asks, leaning down to unlace her own boots, “I can hold my own in a normal fight just fine, thank you. I nailed that thing in the face with the doorknob, didn’t I?”

“The only thing you manage to nail ,was some sad sack that had four new holes in ‘em way past that exorcist.” Pultzer corrects, hands on his hips. “Yer aim is shit; ya pull to yer left.”

Sojourner glances off to the side, knowing he is right. Scrunching her nose, she says nothing.

“Hell, if I hadn’t thrown that flash- bang, I think we both know yer ass woulda ended up splattered all over that alley.” Pultzer continues, walking to his fridge and grabbing a beer. “At least you know how follow orders, I woulda left yer ass if ya started askin’ questions.” The can cracks open with a ssssss, he takes a long swig, a trickle of the golden liquid falling down his jaw, he laps it up with a long purplish tongue. His last statement makes Sojourner perk up.

“Now that you mention it, how did you know to shout ‘Brace for shock’?” She asks, pulling her boots off to sit them upside down in the sink.

“Heh, I know a squid when I see one,” Pultzer sneers, “Can’t fight, can’t run, uncoordinated as shit, and reeks of Neptune’s taint. The world’s finest water taxi service to the world’s best warriors.” He gives a smug smile as he puffs his chest out.

“Ah, I knew I smelled napalm in here,” Sojourner nods to herself, “wait does Hell even have your food? I know you Jar-Heads’ delicate stomachs can only handle Cray-lala.” Sojourner clutches her hands to her chest in false worry, “You poor, dumb Marine you, it’s no wonder why you look so skinny.” Her face brightens with a smile as Pultzer’s hackles bristle, she knows she hit him where it hurts.

“Skinny!? What, ya short, slow, and blind? Look at these arms!” He flexes his arms, the fabric of his green work shirt threatening to rip. “What skinny ass Master Gunnery Sergeant do you know that can bench 470 lbs and do over 80 pull-ups, my squat is…,” He continues to ramble as Sojourner untucks her green, long sleeve jersey and pulls it over her head, her dry fit undershirt clinging to her body, giving the occasional ‘Mhmm, oh, and wooow’ in the most sarcastic tone she can manage.  She removes her flight deck pants last, green leggings hugging her thick thighs underneath. She hangs the dampened garments on empty spots on the shelves to dry. She crosses the room to the lounge as Pultzer is still defending his status. Ignoring him, she opens the fridge, there’s packaged meat, broccoli, and a few cloves of garlic next a block of cheese. ‘I can work with this’ She pulls out the food and makes her way to the kitchen.

“The fuck do you think you’re doing, squid?” Pultzer asks, mid rant. “Who says you can go in my fridge?”.

“You did, when you said make “yerself at home.”” Sojourner over-stresses the country accent as she fires up the stove, “Or do you not want a cooked meal that isn’t unseasoned chicken and rice?”. She places her hands on her cocked hips and waits for his response. “And by the way, that’s AV1 to you, now where is your cutting board?” She asks opening a lower cabinet. Junk, tools, and various gear parts spill out onto the floor with a clatter. Sojourner stares as the mess and lifts her gaze to Pultzer half-lidded. “Marine, explain.” She points to the mess. Pultzer scratches his head, refusing to make eye contact with her.

“Well, ya know, I need more storage and I ain’t always got time between jobs to put stuff away.” Pultzer mumbles, his pointed ears flatten on his head in embarrassment.

“Funny, that doesn’t sound like explanation at all.” Sojourner sucks her teeth, “For the world’s okayest branch, your zone sure isn’t backing up that claim to fame.” She nudges a bag of bolts away from her foot.

“Alright, alright, I’ll clean up! Happy?” Pultzer huffs, stomping over to pick up the items off the floor.

“I will be once I deep clean the kitchen, cause’ right now, I really don’t trust nothin’ in here.” Sojourner replies, turning off the stove and running dish water.

Notes:

Squid: a name that other branches call Navy sailors due to our association to the ocean, we don’t like it, but it will never be that serious.

Jar-Head: a name that other branches call Marines bc of their high and tight hair cut, giving their head a cylindrical shape.

Master Gunnery Sergeant: The highest enlisted rank of a Marine, E-9. It is a HUGE deal, min. 3 years a Master Sergeant and overall 10 in the Corps.

Zone: Any space a service member is responsible for personal or otherwise

Well, at least Sojo has a place to stay, I mean, he did say “make yer’ self at home”. And yes, we do love to give each other shit, like on sight. Love you Marines, not really, but seriously I do.

P.S. if you want to see a crash out, call a Marine small or skinny. You won’t.

Onward!

Chapter 6: Aftershock

Summary:

Sojourner learns what exactly attacked her today and how things operate down in Hell.

Notes:

Oh, how I do enjoy these types of conversations, they’re some of my favorite memories. I’ve been on both sides of the conversation and it’s still funny.

Date: August 16, 2018

Age: Know what? I’ll let you know if anything changes

Location: Crayon Nibbler’s apartment/ workshop

Weather: ….Go ahead, I’m waiting.

Current Conditions: Showered, fed, watching tv with the strange Marine dog-man

One field day later, the duo is quietly sitting on the couch, watching the news recap of the day, plates empty and bellies full. Sojourner freshly showered and wearing a borrowed Verosika Mayday band shirt and green sweatpants, Pultzer wearing red basketball shorts and a gray tank top, nursing another beer.

The newscaster, Katie Killjoy, gives numbers on how many sinners died today and what delays to expect for traffic while the corpses get cleaned off the streets. Sojourner shivers, ‘I was almost a statistic twice today’. A spectacled- lizard sinner, Professor Limskin, begins his explanation on the difference between being killed by a sinner vs an exorcist.

“Sinners technically have nothing to worry about if killed by a regular weapon or really anything that is manufactured in Hell. After dying, the body will simply regenerate after some time, if nothing happens to the body outside of being killed.” The reptile pushes his glasses back up on his pointed face. “However, there are exceptional circumstances where the body is unable to regenerate; for example, if the body is consumed by another being, leaving a little to no traces left, it cannot regenerate until the body is expelled from the other sinner’s system.”

‘Expelled?’ gasp “They have to be shitted out?” Sojourner shoots up from her reclined position. Pultzer inhales his beer, forcing him to sit up choking.

Cough, cough HACK wheeze “What?” He chokes out, wiping the beer dribbling down his chin. “They have to be what out?” Beer leaks out of his black nose, he yanks up the bottom of his tank to wipe it off, blowing slightly.

“Shitted! Is that what he means by expelled?” Sojourner repeats, pointing to the screen. “Y’all’re telling me, that after I got speared, that thing could’ve eaten me, and I would have to wait until I’m passed as a turd to regenerate my body? Will I remember being shat out? Fuck. That!” Her back straightens with indignation.

PFFFFFFTTTT Pultzer nearly misses setting his beer on the coffee table as he sinks to the floor laughing, tears instantly forming. His laugh is full and boisterous as he falls to his knees, holding on the coffee table and his armchair for support.

“What’s funny about that? That is foul!” Sojourner continues, perplexed by his reaction. “Gunny, has that happened to you?” She leans in, waiting for his answer. 

Pultzer looks up at the bear, a bewildering expression plasters his face. ‘Holy shit, she’s dead serious.’ “No! No, I have not been shat out before, Knight, not ever!” The last words punched out. He clears his throat of the invading liquid and wipes the tears on his face. “Gal, I’ve been down here for 11 years and that is the most bat-shit nonsense I have ever heard.” He pulls himself back onto the couch, another laughing fit threatening to take over. Whew! “Damn, I really needed that, thanks Squid.”

“Listen, ya fuckin’ mutt, I done told you already not to call me that.” Sojourner’s eyes narrowed, “And answer my question, was that what today was about, for those…those… she-pigeons to feed?” Her impatience grows as Pultzer roars with laughter again.

“S-She-pigeons!?” He booms, falling back as he holds his stomach, “Yer right! They do look like pigeons!” He holds his stomach and tosses his hand over his eyes, tears, again, streaming down his face. His laughing shakes the couch and carries on for another three minutes. By the time Pultzer gathers himself, Sojourner has turned her attention back to the screen, actively ignoring him. An annoyed pout sits on her face as she curls in on herself.

“So, to reiterate, only angelic and/or holy weapons can deal a permanent second death to any unholy creature. That means sinner all the way up to royalty.” Professor Limskin concludes. Katie Killjoy speaks up before he can continue, roughly shoving the scaly scholar off screen with a CRASH!

“Alright, that was interesting, for any nerd who gives a shit. Long story short, on Extermination Day hunker down and hopefully, you won’t be taken out by Heaven’s deadliest angels! I’m Katie Killjoy on 666 News! Tune in at 10 tonight for the big overlord himself, Vox and his Post Extermination Special!”

Sojourner mutes the TV, shock taking over for the nth time this day, “Angels!?” She screeches.

Notes:

Field Day: to deep clean and oragnize an area, it sucks less the higher rank you are.

Gunny: An abbreviation of Master Gunnery Sergeant because saying the whole is a mouthful.

It’s nice to see our girl is taking everything in stride.

Onward!

Chapter 7: Cover Down

Summary:

Sojourner and Gunny learn a bit more about one another, and decide whether or not they can truly trust each other down in the trenches.

Notes:

**Trigger Warning- Implication of sexual assault, mention of racial violence group, mention of violence against female/ women/ female identifying individuals**

This is NOT the correct way to find out if someone can handle themselves

No one should ever speak or imply anything of this nature to anyone

Date: August 24, 2018

Age: Same, still dead

Location: Hell apparently

Weather: Warm, and it smells outside, like…like pennies and old meat. Nasty.

Current conditions: Repairing a bakery that caught hella strays during extermination

The next several days sort of blend together for Sojourner. After officially meeting Gunnery Sergeant Chester Pultzer, she learns that he joined the Marine Corps at 18 and became a tank mechanic. He served three terms overseas and fought in Sandstorm Desert Freedom where he and his platoon met their end. In Hell, he and his boys opened a repair shop and took on odd jobs to keep themselves afloat before one-by-one his team was exterminated, him being the only one left.

Sojourner joined the Navy at 19 and was the first woman in her family to serve. Spending most of her career overseas in Japan, she became a highly knowledgeable aviation electrician for the F-18 aircraft and learned skills of all the other rates for the aircraft as well. After she was fully settled, Gunny brings Sojourner along for a repair job and she easily falls into a rhythm with him, their conversations making the days go by quicker. During their talks, Sojourner notes many of Gunny’s mannerism, the biggest being his heavy refusal to speak of exactly what he did in the desert. When she tries to share about her death, he stops her from going into detail about the day.

“Look, as far as I’m concerned, it don’t really matter. Ya fucked up while you were alive, and it got you sent down here. Consider this a chance for a clean slate, a damned one, but its clean.” He drawls as he holds his hand out to Sojourner “9/16.” She reaches into her tool pouch and hands him the wrench and goes back to tightening down the last bolt of the table they’re working on. “No one cares what yer down here for, so why waste time thinking about it?”

“I dunno, I think it is helpful to know why someone is down here. At least for personal safety and who you’re doing business with.” replies Sojourner, crawling out from underneath and stands, “Like it be good to know if I’m near a gaggle of assholes who really didn’t like MLK, or are pissed at Lincoln.” She brushes off the knees of her green coveralls, “Lets me know what areas to avoid so I can continue to mind my business.”

Gunny looks at her with eyebrows lifted, “You may have had to worry about that when you were alive, but here, assume everyone hates you and wants you dead.” He gives the table a sturdy shake, happy with how it holds.

“Be that as it may, the people who hate me are not going to come at you with the same type of violent mindset.” Sojourner retorts, taken aback by his words. “It’s not going to be a run-and-gun, boom, you’re done. People like that are probably even more bold because they’re in Hell with nothing to lose!” She adjusts the tool pouch on her hip, it purrs happily, “Down here, they have the green light to be as cruel as they like!”

“So, what are you going to do about it?” Pultzer asks crossing his arms.

“The fuck!?” Sojourner snaps, her skin heating up under her thick fur.

“Yer stuck down here with all types of shit people, who ain’t gonna change their ways or their minds! So, what are you going to do for yerself?” He asks again, leaning down to be face-to-face with her. “Be upset all ya want, ain’t gonna stop assholes from thinking they can do whatever they want to ya. You, a small, weak, unassuming girl.” Leaning forward, he bares his teeth at her, “Hell, what’s stopping me?” He eyes her up and down hungrily, licking his lips.

Crunch. SLAM. CRACK! SHATTER! Gunny’s large body is thrown against the bakery’s large shop window, breaking it instantly. Blood pours from from his black nose as he slides down to the floor. He looks up at Sojourner and sees nothing but focus. Sojourner stands in a boxer’s stance with her arms squared close to her face. A six-inch Phillips’ head screwdriver is reverse- gripped in her right-hand, the left dripping with a fresh coat of blood. Her breathing is steady as she lightly bounces on the balls of her steel-toed boots.

Gunny shakily stands to his feet, without breaking eye contact and leans against the wall. He smiles, “Good, guess you weren’t full-a shit when you said you could handle a normal fight.” Sojourner doesn’t reply or break her stance, still poised to strike again. “I was expecting the punch, did not expect the throw at all.” Gunny places his hands on either side of his nose, crunch. Sojourner fights back a gag as Gunny sets his right shoulder back into place. Whew “Shit Squid, color me impressed.” No reaction out of the sailor still. “Good, good, not buyin’ any false sense of security either, good.” Gunny laughs, a genuine smile crossing his face. He holds his hands up in surrender, “Alright, I give up.” The only response from Sojourner is a tighter grip on the screwdriver. The German Shepherd frowns, “Hey, relax, it was only a test to see how you would handle yourself.” Nothing.

Gunny face sombers, “AV1, I yield, c’mon now.” A moment passes, then another, Sojourner does not drop her stance, she doesn’t blink. The Marine studies her face and recognizes an all too familiar look, fear. He slowly gets to his knees and sits back on his feet. “Knight, I’m sorry. I swear on my honor as a Marine.” His deep voice soft and gentle. Her face softens slightly, “Sojo, Gal, please.” She slowly relaxes and releases a shaky breath. Bringing her arms down to her side, she trembles slightly.

“Gunnery Sergeant, don’t you ev-” Her voice catches, she holds her stomach with her free hand and takes a steadying breath, a-ahem “Do not ever make me hit you like that again, do you understand?” Her voice is thick, “I need to trust someone down here, and you’re all I got.” Her gaze bores into his as her tears threaten to fall. “You know as damn well as I do what gets swept under the rug in the military,” Her lower lip quivers, “and I’m not going through that shit again.” A tear falls, Gunny furry ears fall flat to his head in shame. “So, tell me right now, so I’m not wasting my fuckin’ time, can I trust you?” Another tear falls, “I am new to Hell, and I am afraid. Sniff I don’t need to be alone with an enemy pretending to be my ally, can I trust you?” Gunny stares at her in silence. Sojourner’s grip retightens on the screwdriver. “Goddamn it, Marine, answer me!” She snarls.

“Yes.” Gunny finally answers, “I got your six, Knight, I got it.” He slowly stands up, hands still raised.

“Swear it.” She demands, tears falling freely. Gunny looks at her for a long minute, then pulls himself to attention.

“I, Chester Pultzer, swear to you, Petty Officer First Class Aviation Electrician Technician Sojourner Knight, to cover you down. I will never abandon you on or off the field of battle and will lay down my life protecting you. This I swear as a Master Gunnery Sergeant of the United State’s Marine Corps.”

Sojourner stands to attention, “I, Sojourner Knight, swear to you, Master Gunnery Sergeant Chester Pultzer, to cover you down. I will never abandon you on or off the field of battle and will lay down my life to protect you. This I swear as a Petty Officer First Class of the United State’s Navy.” She renders a salute and Gunny returns it, dropping it first allowing Sojourner to follow suit. They stare at each other for a moment. Sojourner wipes her eyes and then stretches out her hand, Gunny steps forward and grips it, both giving a firm handshake.

A burst of warmth swells in Sojourner’s chest and crawls down her spine, putting her at an ease she hasn’t felt in a long time even in life. She gives Gunny a sincere smile.

“Good shit.” She grins up at him.

“Good shit.” He returns, cracking a smile of his own.

“So, you guys are going to replace my window, right?” A woman that looks like she’s made of fondant asks as she peeks from behind the kitchen window. “I’m not paying for something you two broke.”

The service members look at the woman, back to the shattered window, then back to the woman.

“Yes ma’am, I apologize for the window. We’ll get that replaced right away, free of charge.” Sojourner answers.

“Wait a min-” Gunny starts, Sojourner squeezes his hand painfully, cutting him off.

“After all, we’re the ones who broke it, makes no sense why you should pay for it, right?” she says through gritted teeth as she gives Gunny a “try-me” look. “In the meantime, Gunny here is going to hang a tarp to cover the hole.” She says sweetly. “I will sweep up all the glass, and again, I apologize for the disturbance.” Giving the baker a dimpled smile. 

The baker smiles back, “Well, aren’t you a polite, young lady?” She glances to Gunny, “About time you hired someone with manners.”

“Yeah, yeah Eggy, keep yappin’.” Gunny flexes the pain out his hand, shooting an annoyed look at Sojourner who is already grabbing a broom from the corner.

Finishing up the repair job, the duo places a temporary covering on the shop window and arrange for the glass to be delivered to the shop in the morning. In a comfortable silence, the pair make the long trek back to the workshop, done with all the jobs for the day.

“Damn, my feet ache,” Gunny gripes as he drags his hand down his face. “All this walking is fucking killing me.”

“How much to get a car?” Sojourner asks, pulling her bun out into a ponytail.

“What’s the point? Can’t trust no one to make a fair deal or not sell me a lemon.” Gunny huffs.

“What about fixing one up?” Sojourner continues, “I mean you’re a mechanic, aren’t you?”

“A tank mechanic.” Gunny clarifies, “And I don’t see a tank around, Squid.”

“It’s the same damn thing! It’s a vehicle, just a less sturdy one.” exclaims Sojourner. “If you can fix a tank, you can fix a car.”

“Sure thing, find me a free car and I’ll spruce it up.” Gunny argues back. Sojourner rolls her eyes, shaking her head at her stubborn companion when her mix-matched eyes land across the street. 

“What about that one?” Sojourner points across the street to a windowless van that has clearly seen better days. The dingy light blue paint is marred by patches of corrosion. A deep, rusty gash starting from one end of the hood ends ¾ of the way across, the windshield is spiderwebbed with cracks. All four wheels are flat, and the hubs and brakes are rusted beyond functionality. The sliding door to the body of the van is holding on by faith alone and the rear doors both are decorated with deep dents and dings. The dust on the dashboard is evidence that no one has touched this scrapheap in ages. Sojourner walks over and cautiously peeks into the rear of the van.

Immediately, she’s hit with a stench of stagnant water and old grease that nearly knocks the breath out of her lungs. Throwing her shirt over her nose she gags, while Gunny opens the driver’s door CREEEEAAAKK! They both wince away from the noise. The driver and passenger seat are torn to shreds as sharp springs poke out from the stained fabric. The handle of the gear shift is missing as well as the rear-view mirror. A family of hell-rats (that’s a thing) skitter free as Sojourner opens the rear, squeaking at being discovered. Inside of the van is filled with trash and rat skeletons. A large dent on the roof bulges the frame of the interior. Sojourner and Gunny look at wreckage then to each other.

“Not bad.” They say at the same time and share a laugh.

Notes:

Okay, so our girl can handle herself, and Gunny knows that now as well. Again, do not ever do this to anyone or allow anyone to do this to you.

Chapter 8: Cold Hearth

Summary:

You when you wake up and you just KNOW you’re late for work or school or something? This is not like that at all.
Happy reading!

Notes:

Y’all have noticed by now, I have a entry log each chapter, hopefully this will help keep track of the going-ons because I will be bouncing back and forth between past and present, Hell and elsewhere so be sure to peep that.

Thanks for the kudos and bookmarks so far! It’s super encouraging. Leave a comment I wanna talk to y’all!

Date: August 02, 2018

Age: Ancient

Location: The Royal Palace

Weather: Hot with a guarantee of sulfuric rain all day

Current Condition: Waking up knowing something is wrong.

“Darling, please, let’s talk about this! I didn’t want this to even happen, but it’s the only way to keep you and Charlie safe from Heaven!” Lucifer’s voice echoes as he watches his wife turn her back to him. Her face shrouded in shadow.

“Lilith, please don’t go! I’m sorry, I’ll keep trying, Heaven won’t listen to me, please!” Lucifer is running towards Lilith who getting further away, he can’t catch up.

“LILITH, DON’T LEAVE ME!!”

Lucifer shoots up in a panic, rubber ducks fall off his workbench and hit the floor with soft squeaks. He looks around frantically at the empty space of his bedroom, his heart slams against his chest.

“Lily?” the King croaks out, his voice rough with sleep. Cough, cough AHEM “Lilith?” Swiveling around in his chair, Lucifer goes to stand up and almost trips down the two steps, he catches himself at the last second. “L- ahem, Lilith?” He wipes the drool off his chin with his hand before adjusting his white overcoat to sit comfortably on his lithe body. The room spins, Lucifer leans on to the wall for stability, clutching his head as he waits for it to stop.

Opening his bedroom door, the angel peeks out looking left and right before stepping out into the spacious hallway, it’s dim with no signs of life anywhere else. “Lilith!” Lucifer calls again, his rich voice echoing throughout the palace. No answer.

Smoothing his hair down as best as he can, Lucifer tiptoes to his wife’s suite, “Darling, are you awake?” He asks hopefully as he arrives at the large black and purple doors. Fiddling with his hands, the king asks, “Lilith, may I come in please?” Lucifer waits for a reply, hearing nothing, he lets out a nervous chuckle. “Heh, heh, knock, knock?” He sing-songs nervously, rapping his knuckles gently against the black wood. No noise is heard on the other side. ‘Please answer, sweetie.’ A trembling hand grips the obsidian doorknob, “Lilith?” Lucifer starts as he slowly opens the door, peeking his head in. “Lili-” he stops short as his eyes fall to the center of the bed.

A glistening black crown sits neatly on a pillow with a glitter of gold sitting on top of the center spire. Lucifer approaches the bed and lets out a choked cry. He picks up the gold wedding band off the crown and clutches it to his chest as sobs rack through his body. The king drops to his knees, gripping the violet sheets for some kind of purchase. “LILITH!!” pained cries echo through the empty palace.

No one hears him.

Notes:

Woah, that was dramatic, ngl I do get emotional when I write scenes like this. I don’t like making characters suffer but it’s for the plot. Lucifer, I’m sorry, boo!

Onwards!

Chapter 9: Leave a Message

Summary:

Our princess deals with the absence of both parents and takes initiative in upholding royal traditions and responsibilities… it doesn’t go well

Notes:

What up y’all? I am so stoked to know you guys are enjoying the story thus far! And it isn’t entirely about Sojourner, there are multiple major players in this tale, next up: Charlie!

Date: August 18, 2018

Age: 200 give or take

Location: The Queen’s Mansion

Weather: Sunny or whatever Hell considers sunny

Current Condition: Depression is in session, where’s mom and why won’t she answer the phone?

“The number you have dialed is unavailable, please leave a message at the tone” *beeeep* “Hi mom, hope everything is going great and you’re enjoying yourself! Um, I haven’t heard from you or dad in a while so I’m just calling to say ‘Hi’ and I love you and I hope everything is going great. But I already said that and uuuuuhhh yeah, just give me call when you get this! And take pictures of wherever you are so we can have a slideshow with dad when you get back. O-or it can just be you and me, whatever you want to do, I’m flexi-“ *beeep* The phone cuts off the rest of the sentence as the time limit for a message expires.

Charlie heaves out a heavy sigh and looks out the window of her lush bedroom. It has been over two weeks since she woke up to her mother absence from their home. The staff has no idea where the queen went, and no notes have been left for the princess. She tried calling her dad a few times but each time the voicemail answered instead. Hell, she has even gone to the palace to see him but only his tired voice greeted her from behind the locked front door. Even the king has no idea where his wife is but assured Charlie that he was positive she was safe. When asked about his own wellbeing, his only response was “I’m okay Char-char, just a little tired.” And sent her on her way.

Charlie rests her chin on her hand as she continues to stare out the window towards Pentagram city. KeeKee hops up on the couch to join her, accidentally jumping on the remote, turning the tv on. The kitty settles into Charlie’s lap as she begins to pet her, purring loudly.

“I’m Tom Trench and here are the latest traffic updates! All major roads are finally clear of corpses to resume the normal flow of bumper-to-bumper traffic. Side roads should be clean by midnight tonight to add more frustration to more narrow roads! Katie?” The gasmask wearing newscaster turns to his co-anchor, who gives a soulless smile.

“Thanks Tom, yes folks, the aftermath of this year’s extermination is finally wrapping up and without a rousing speech from the Queen, strangely breaking tradition. I wonder why the Queen skipped this mundane task, who knows? Who gives a shit? No one here on channel 666, that’s for sure. Next up, what to expect from Velvette’s new fashion line, we’ll be giving you an exclusive at the top of the hour, stay tuned! Seriously, who the fuck cares about that spee-” the broadcast cuts off before Katie could finish her scathing remark. Charlie slowly sits up as horror and realization take over.

The speech. ‘THE SPEECH!’ “OOOOOH my gosh, mom’s speech, I totally forgot!” Charlie jumps up, the little cat leaps off her lap and glares, her ears in airplane mode. “KeeKee, mom’s not here to give her speech!” She paces frantically back and forth, biting her thumb nail. “I- I gotta do it! I got to cover down while mom is gone!” The princess declares determinedly. “I gotta get to the city now!” Charlies runs out her room and down the hall. Ba-BOOM-th-th-thump The sound of a body tumbles down the stairs is followed by beat of silence then a pained “I’m okay.”

Charlie sits in the backseat of her family’s limo as she is driven to the heart of pentagram city, her knees bouncing rapidly in an attempt to steady her nerves. “Okay Charlie, no biggie, just a rousing speech to encourage your citizens that they are strong and to not give up!” The limo pulls up to the front of the Heavenly Embassy and she climbs out. Charlie does her best not to immediately gag at the foul odor that assaults all her senses at once and climbs the cleans steps to the front door. As she turns around to face the public, she realizes there’s no crowd. She stands awkwardly, looking lost. ‘Usually, there’s a big crowd waiting for mom, where’s the crowd?’

Charlie looks to her butlers, Razzle and Dazzle, the two little, flying goats stare blankly into space, happy to be here. ‘Crap, did mom let people know she was coming or did people just flock to her?’ Tapping her leg nervously, she draws a steadying breath and exhales deeply, centering herself. ‘Draw the people in Charlie, you can do it.’ Charlie takes another deep breath in “ATTENTION SINNERS! GATHER ROUND, PLEASE AND THANK YOU!” A handful of sinners stop mid-stride and look her way, most just ignore her and keep about their activities. Charlie freezes, a nervous smile plasters her alabaster face. “Uuuhh, h-hello citizens! I’m here to you, COME to you, as your pr-princess to…to uh.” She stammers, stuck on the words. “Congratulate, you? ‘Fuck.’ On surviving another exterminat- oooooh, this sound bad.” Charlie trails off, angry sinners glare up at her.

“Did this bitch just say, ‘Congrats’?” An impish sinner growls.

“‘Congratulations? CONGRATULATIONS?! FUCK YOU!” An angry voice calls out from the street, as murmurs begin to pick up. A cold sweat breaks out on Charlie’s forehead.

“I LOST MY HUSBAND! WHAT THE FUCK IS THERE TO CONGRATULATE, YOU FUCKIN’ ROYAL!” A woman spits, her melted wax body bubbling with anger.

More sinners join in as an angry crowd begins to build and the volume grows. Charlie’s heart drops to her stomach as she hugs her arms, panic increasing. “Wa-wait, I’m sorry! I’m soooo sorry! I-I didn’t mean to-”. A glass bottle whizzes past her head, smashing into the luxurious door behind her. The princess’ eyes widen in fear, ‘Oh shit, shit, shit!’. A fight breaks out in the street, more and more sinners join the fray, the crowd becomes a riot. Charlie stares on in shock, her whole body locking up in fear.   

Dazzle flies up and ushers her back to the limo as heavy, sharp objects are thrown. The white luxury car peels off, narrowly missing sinners that charge at the vehicle. Charlie looks on in horror, voices shouting and fists beat against her window, tears well up and her lip begins to tremble. She reaches up and pulls her blonde hair to her rosy cheeks ‘Where are you, mom?’ Tears fall.

Notes:

Saying congratulations on surviving a massacre is giving Effie Trinket in Hunger Games. I like Effie!

Onwards!

Chapter 10: Thank You for Your Service

Summary:

The Knight siblings are just about to leave for a fun-filled family reunion, when they get some unexpected vistors

Notes:

Hey babes, I’m gonna be honest, I cried a bit when writing this one. I love my family very much and I can’t imagine what this would be like for any of them. If you have people you love in your life, tell em.

Date: August 18, 2018

Age: 17

Location: Greensboro, NC in the driveway of Elijah and Aura Knight’s home

Weather: 88* Partly cloudy with a pleasant breeze

Current Condition: The day of the Knight Family Cookout, the Knight siblings are waiting for the youngest to come downstairs.

“HARMONY! COME ON BABY, IT’S TIME TO GO!” the oldest Knight sibling, Queen, calls from the front of the house as she checks her purple drawstring backpack one more time for the essentials. “YOU BETTA HURRY IF YOU WANT THE AUX CORD!”

“Or else I might snag it.” Matthias sings teasing, exiting the garage door with his older sister Desiree and sister-in-law, Aura. “We can listen to my newest mix!”

“Oh lord, Cha-Cha please hurry!” Desiree playfully begs, she dodges a swipe from Matthias’ college jacket, “Save us from being Tidas’ guinea pigs!” She flashes a grin at her baby brother and grabs his face, leaving a wine-red kiss mark on the center of his forehead with a loud MWAH.

“Dezzi!” Matt gripes at the second oldest, pulling himself free, “Dezzi, does this stain?”

“Of course.” She answers matter of factly, throwing an arm around Aura’s shoulder, bunching her blonde hair around her fair face.

“Man!” The freshman wipes at his forehead, observing his reflection.

Queen checks her watch “What is that girl doing and where is Elijah?” Placing her hand on her hips and shielding her eyes from the sun.

“Eli is helping Cha-Cha find Sojo.” Aura explains, smiling warmly, “You know we can’t leave without Sojo.”

A collective ‘aaaaahhhh’ harmonizes between the three siblings in agreement, a beat of silence passes.

“How much longer?” Matthias asks, looking down at his blue high-tops.

“Two more months and then she’s stationed in VA Beach.” Queen answers, pulling her little brother into a bear hug. “Don’t tell Eli or Cha-Cha, but she’s being flown off the ship early.” She whispers. “So Tidas, make sure your school knows so you can come see her.” A large grin spreads across the college freshman’s face, he can’t wait to see his sister again.

Excitement buzzes among the group as they wait for the last two siblings to meet them in the driveway.

“I found her Cha-Cha!” A deep voice calls out from under a pink bed. “She was wedged between your bed and the wall. Elijah wiggles out from under the bed, dusting off the stray pom-pom streamers and glitter that now cling to his purple reunion shirt.

The youngest comes bounding up the stairs with a wide smile as she wipes the last of her tears away. Her light-brown twists bounce on her head as she eagerly reaches for the doll of her sister’s image holding a salute. It was a simple gift, but it is Harmony’s most treasured possession, at least until her sister is back in her arms again. She takes the doll and gives it a tight squeeze before throwing her arms around her brother’s neck. “Thank you, Eli! Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Elijah hugs the 17-year-old dancer back, “No worries, thanks for remembering to bring her. Now let’s get going.” The 33-year-old cracks the bedroom window, “Guys, close the garage, we’ll leave through the front door.” He calls out to his family, shutting the window after. “C’mon Cha-Cha.” Harmony leads the way down the steps and jumps down the last three. She waits for her brother to set the security as she admires the rainbow palette on her nails. Elijah walks up to the teen with a nod. The system beeps, beginning the 15-second countdown before the security is set, prompting Harmony to open the door. Beep. There stand two sailors in Service Dress Blues, the higher rank stands with a raised fist, ready to knock. Elijah’s stomach drops. ‘No.’

“Can I help you?” He asks, instinctively pushing Harmony behind him. The young girl peeks out from behind his shoulder. Beep 10 seconds. ‘You have the wrong house.’ Elijah tells himself.

“Good afternoon, Sir, is your name Elijah Knight, brother to Sojourner Knight?” The sailor asks, the rest of the siblings circle to the front porch to see the two visitors. Beep five. Queen’s breath hitches as Dezzi and Aura’s faces fall. Beep four. Matthias shoots Harmony a confused look, which she returns, squeezing her sister tighter to her chest. Beep three.

“Yes.” Elijah quietly answers, his heartbeat pulses in his ears. ‘Tell me she’s just hurt. She’s at the hospital waiting for me.’ Everything suddenly seems far away. Beep two. ‘Please.’

The sailor takes a steadying breath and calls him and his partner to attention. “Sir, we regret to inform you-”

Beep.

Security system offline.

Notes:

There is a unit that will make makeshift dolls of service members for families to help deal with the absence of the service members while they are away, on deployment, detachment, etc. These dolls are usually given to children as a parent or a loved one are the ones that are absent.

The service members that carry the extremely heavy responsibility of delivering messages such as these are called The Honor Guard. They are available in all branches and each have their own process.

A message of tragedy in the Armed Forces is called a Red Cross Message, service members will receive such a message by their most superior leadership officer or enlisted and are granted a short allotted time to handle urgent personal matters.

Chapter 11: In Work

Summary:

Just a normal workday between service members, normal banter, normal pleasantries.

Notes:

I have had this exact type of conversation on the daily at work. I love it.

Date: September 29, 2018

Age: Still dead, babes

Location: Hell, in Gunny’s garage

Weather: Whatever passes for nighttime I guess

Current Conditions: Listening to a rock music station and having the ability to hold a flashlight questioned.

 

“Just fuckin’ hold it where I can see!” Gunny grunts, lying underneath the van the duo lifted off the street, arms deep in the undercarriage.

“I can’t fuckin’ see where you need me to point the damn light at, dog breath!” Sojourner snaps back, lying perpendicular in a feeble attempt to get a better angle. “Point. Where?”

“There!” He answers impatiently, not pointing to anything in particular.

“I swear to all that is unholy, if you do not give clearer directions,” Sojourner warns, losing her patience.

“To the fuckin’ right side of the engine block, dumb tits!” Gunny snaps, gesturing with his pointed nose.

“Then fuckin’ say that, dick tickler!” Sojourner yells back, “How much meth did you eat in your hay day that you can’t fuckin’ use your words!?” She adjusts the angle of the flashlight, “Does this work for you?”

“Yes, fuckin’ leave it!” Gunny growls.

“I’ll fuckin’ leave you.” Sojourner retorts, glaring at him.

“Say again?” Gunny challenges, his lip raising to bare a little bit of teeth, pausing his work.

“What are you old, brain-fried, and deaf? I said, ‘I’ll fuckin’ leave you!’” Sojourner narrows her eyes at the German Shepard. “I didn’t st-st-stutter, nut sack!”

“Shit fuck.” Gunny says flatly, resuming his actions.

“Ass hat.” Sojourner shoots back.

“Squid.” He counters.

“Mutt.” She returns.

The duo falls quiet as Gunny successfully installs the fuel line; his greasy hands fall on his torso as he heaves a satisfied sigh. A soft rock ballad starts up as the pair lie there, admiring their handy work.

“All good?” Sojourner asks brightly, straining her neck to see the new installment.

“Yep, fuel line is in there.” Gunny confirms as he shimmies out from under the van.

“Nice, wanna get food?” She asks, gathering the tools near her head before scooting out.

“Yeah, I could eat, what’re ya in the mood for?” Gunny asks, wiping his hands on a blackened rag as they begin to clean up. Sojourner lists restaurants that pique her interests as she organizes the toolbox, ensuring nothing is missing.

—One hour passes—

Later, the two battle buddies pick up their food order and return home to flop down on the couch. Gunny flips on one of his favorite movies and they eat.  Halfway through the movie, Sojourner pauses it and turns to Gunny.

”Yo, I wanna ask you somethin’.” She says.

”Can it wait until after the bus blows up?” Gunny asks, annoyed at the sudden interruption.

”You’ve seen Speed three times this month, you’re fine.” The black bear rolls her eyes, “C’mon now, it’s serious.”

Gunny lets out a low groan as he sits up to look at her, “Alright, what is it?” Sojourner takes a deep breath, gathering herself.

”Will you train me in field combat?” Sojourner finally asks, a firm look on her face. 

The Marine lifts his eyebrow in surprise. ”Field combat?”

”Mhmm.” Sojourner confirms, playing with a braid. “I want to be able to handle myself like you can.” Seeing his surprised look, she heaves a sigh and continues, “Look, I was a technician in the Navy, I’ve never been in field combat first-hand. And down here, it’s all a war field. I can grapple just fine but…” Sojourner looks away, “You’re right, there isn’t anything stoppin’ anyone from doing what they want to me. I need to know how to fight, how to use guns, knives, y’know the works.” She looks back up at Gunny, “So will you train me?” 

Gunny leans back looking at her and says nothing, mulling the request over, “You realize you’re asking me to train you like a Marine?”

”Yes.” Sojourner answers.

”One-on-one?” Gunny continues.

”Yes.”

”It ain’t nothing like you’ve ever experienced and I ain’t letting up until you pass.” Gunny leans forward, his eyes narrowing. “If you agree, this apartment, along with everythin’ else,  is now a training environment. You will follow the command of your superior officer.”

”I understand and agree.” Sojourner answers, a hard look on her face.

”…Fine, starting tomorrow, your training begins. Now switch back on my movie.” Gunny reclines back into his relaxed position. Sojourner grabs the remote and presses play.

”Yes sir.”

Notes:

Woah, does Sojourner actually know what she’s asking? Can she handle it? Let’s see if this bear got that dog in her.

Onwards!

Chapter 12: Deal Me In

Summary:

The shores of Eden, what did the beautiful Queen of the damned agree to get such a hook up?

Notes:

I did my best with the what the show gave us in those brief. I’m so ready for season 2 to learn more about her.

Date: August 02, 2018

Age: Ancient but Still a Bombshell Baddie

Location: Beach of Eden

Weather: Perfect Sunset beach weather, every day

Current Conditions: A perfect day interrupted by an ex.

 

A soft breeze off the sea caresses pale skin and ankle-length blonde hair as Lilith raises her chin to feel the sun on her neck. She reaches for the red wine resting on the table beside her lounge chair as she takes a deep inhale, smelling the salty air. The gentle crash of waves add to the ambience of the serenity, relaxation courses through the Queen’s body. She lets out a sigh of satisfaction as takes a sip of her wine. Tart pomegranate flood her taste buds, a delightful burn runs down her throat. Beneath her cat-eye sunglasses, her eyes slip close and her head rests against the chair. Simply perf-

“HEY LILITH!” A gruff voice cuts through the serene scene, “HOT TITS, WHERE YA AT?”

The queen’s mouth tightens, instantly angry that her peace is disturbed by her first ex-husband. She takes another sip of her wine, not bothering to answer.

“BABE! LILITH!!” The voice calls out again, “LIL-oh, there you are, heh sup, babe?” An angel with glowing yellow eyes and mouth saunters up to the tall woman. The large first man leans on the back of her lounge chair, throwing the balance off immediately. The cloth of his long sleeve knocks her violet sun hat to the side, a dull scent of barbecued meat wafts off the man. “You diggin’ the beach?” he asks, his voice entirely too loud for her liking. Lilith takes a deep breath through her nose and exhales slowly through her mouth. Taking a swig of her drink, she gulps loudly not trying to hide her annoyance.

“Adam.” Her velvety voice finally speaks, she continues to fix her gaze on the water. Adam walks around to the front of the beach chair, blocking the sun.

“You really done with that imp and finally realize whatcha been missin’?” The first man leans down to meet her eye-level. “Ya ready to say goodbye to the dumbest decision ya ever made?” A sneer sets on his face. “Because I don’t wanna hear ya bitch and moan about any regre-” Adam is cut off by Lilith raising her left hand, clear of her wedding band, she takes another deep swig of her wine, finishing the glass.

Adam lets out a surprise chuckle, “Ho-ho-holy shit! Ya really did it!” A wide smile breaks out across his black and yellow mask. “Alright, you did your part, so I’ll hold up mine.” He sits down on the end of the lounge chair, forcing Lilith to bunch her legs together. Behind her sunglasses, her eyes narrow in disgust. “You chill here, and when the time comes, you grab your brat and help us take out that little fucker and all his hellish posse.” Adam grabs the wine bottle and refills her glass, she says nothing and takes another sip. The angel removes his mask to reveal his true face and takes a pull off the bottle, Lilith doesn’t hide her grimace. “Shall we seal the deal, gorgeous?” He sultry asks, leaning in close to her beautiful face.

A moment passes before Lilith takes another long sip before placing her glass down and taking off her sunglasses. “Fine.” Is all she says before leaning forward and pressing her black lips to Adam’s.

Notes:

I haven’t decided what direction Ms. Queen is going to go in. Just playin it by ear.

Chapter 13: Figure It Out

Summary:

A simple small lunch between estranged father and daughter, it should all go very well. Keyword: Should

Notes:

I feel like in the past, Charlie would have tried to reach out to her dad. But neither understanding how crippling depression works and having little to no foundation of a relationship in the first place… the intention was sweet in nature.

Date: October 27, 2018

Age: a 200 years-old baby

Location: Royal Palace Garden

Weather: Cloudy and kinda hard to breathe, the two are not related

Current Condition: A lunch date that really got away from everyone

1300 or 1 pm for normal people

Charlie sits stiffly at the garden table with her hands shoved in her lap as she looks at all the delectable finger food. Razzle offers her a plate of cucumber sandwiches and she smiles sweetly at the demonic butler, shaking her head.

“No, thank you, Razzle, I don’t really have much an appetite right now.” The little goat puts the plate down and goes to join his twin. Charlie’s leg bounces in a feeble attempt to self-soothe, glancing at her phone to check the time. ‘I did say 12:30 right? Did he think I meant A.M.?’ She blows out a long, shaky breath as her leg bounces faster. It’s been so long since she and her dad have had one-on-one time together, now with her mother gone it feels even more tense.

The French doors of the palace fling open as the king hurries out, fixing his coat with one hand and adjusting his top hat with another.

“Heeeeyy, Char-char! I’m so sorry I’m late, I lost track of time!” Lucifer jogs up to his daughter with his arms stretched out with an apologetic smile. Charlie stands and hinges at the hips to meet her father in an awkward hug, a forced smile stretching across her pretty face. “Mammon would not shut up about something or other even though I told him I had a prior engagement.” Lucifer pulls out Charlie’s seat and then sets his apple cane against the table and sits down across from the princess. “Sooooo, how ya been?” He asks, leaning way too far forward for either of their comfort.

“Oh! Uh! I’ve been…good. Really good! Razzle and Dazzle are taking great care of me and KeeKee is still super cute!” Charlie lets out a nervous chuckle, “Um, I’m working on a concept of a project, and I would love your input. It- it’s still in its brainstorming phase, but I think that this can really make a difference if it takes off!”

Lucifer perks up, his daughter wants his opinion about an idea of hers? Excitement dances across the angel’s face, “Oh hell yeah, sweetie, let’s hear it, I’m all ears!” He takes off his hat and hands it to Dazzle. The king scoots his chair in before pouring the two of them cups of tea, serving Charlie first. He adds four cubes of sugar and a splash of milk before sitting back and eagerly looks at his daughter.

Charlie takes a deep breath, “So, I was watching the news a few months ago, right after the exterminations specifically, and the news anchor made a comment about Mom not doing her annual speech. And I thought, ‘Oh my gosh, Mom’s away on an important trip. She isn’t available to make her speech’!” Lucifer winces at the mention of his wife but says nothing, doing his best to keep his face neutral.

“So, I said to KeeKee ‘Someone needs to give a speech and since Mom and Dad are busy, I can do it!’” Charlie says with a triumphant grin. Lucifer actively concentrates on not bouncing his leg as his anxiety quickly grows. Nodding, his face pulls into a tight smile as he rests his chin on his laced fingers, keeping his fingers from tapping. Charlie continues with her story.

“I hopped in the limo, and I headed straight to the Angelic Embassy with Razzle and Dazzle but when I got there, there was no waiting crowd. I realized that maybe people anticipated Mom being there beforehand, that’s why there was always a giant crowd for her, so that was a learning moment.” She laughs embarrassed, “But I wasn’t deterred, and I called out to the people instead! And a few people even stopped!” Lucifer feels his left eye fighting a twitch, his anxiety winning out as his leg begins to bounce rapidly. “Are you okay, Dad?” Charlie asks, eying the tension growing on her father’s face.

“Oh, I’m just really into this story Ducky, that’s all.” Lucifer strains through smiling, gritting teeth, “What happened next?” His voice rising in pitch, without him meaning to.

“What happened? Uuuhh, what happened was another teachable moment on the importance of preparedness!” Charlie puffs her chest out with a stressed thumb-up, her strained smile now matching the King’s “And, while enthusiasm is crucial, having a well thought out speech written down is essential! Especially, if one is talking about the very touchy subject of surviving the horrors of extermination.”

Gold blood starts to streak down Lucifer's chin as he bites his lip, “Oh? What wheeze what did you say to- to the sinners, Pumpkin?” Failing to keep the building panic out of his voice.

“Um, I said…’Congratulations’?” Charlie’s voice gets quieter with each word.

“Congratulations?” Lucifer clarifies, his yellow eyes widening.

“Con-congratulations, yeah.” The young demon confirms, pressing her two index fingers together in shame. Her rosy cheeks flush crimson as her shoulders bunch up near her ears. She doesn’t look at her dad.

“Congratulations on what, sweetie?” The Devil’s voice in a strange, sweet tone, he pulls the high collar of his coat around his chin, hiding in his coat. “Congrats on what?”

“Yeeeaaahhh, that’s where I kinda lost my train of thought.” Charlie’s attention deeply invested in the end of her hair, “The moment the word ‘congratulations’ came out, it felt wrong.”

“Yep, uh-huh, I can see that.” Lucifer agrees, his bouncing leg shaking the table, he presses his hand to his knee in a failed attempt to hold it still.

“And when the angry crowd formed and stuff started flying everywhere, I realized it was definitely the wrong thing to say.” The shaking of the table stops, Charlie looks up and jumps at her father’s now red glowing eyes. Lucifer stands up knocking his chair over.

“They attacked you!?” He snarls, his red horns forming through his forehead as he leans over the table.

“NO! No, they just started a… fussy flash-mob!” Charlie leans away from her dad, shocked at his reaction. “Plus, Razzle and Dazzle got me out of there fast, before too many people gathered around! I’m completely fine!” Charlie waves her hands frantically, desperate to calm her dad down. “But that brings me to the point of my proje-”

“Charlotte, I forbid you from going back to the city!” The King barks, horns at full length, “No filthy, dead human is going to threaten my daughter!” Flames leap out of his mouth, “By the time I’m done with them, they’ll be-”

“Dad, wait! I messed up and got them upset! What I said was irrespons-“ Charlie stands with her hands raised.

“IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER!” Lucifer bellows, his black tail snaps back and forth like a whip.

“IT MATTERS TO ME!!” Charlies slams her hands down on the table, her own eyes turning red. “Listen, if we can help these sinners then we…”

“HELP THEM? HELP. THEM?” Lucifer spits flames with each word, “IF THEY THINK THEY CAN HARM YOU, THEN THEY DESERVE TO DIE AGAIN!” Lucifer declares as voices of the damned blend in with his.

“Dad! They do not need Hellfire, they need help!” Charlie’s long blonde hair begins to whip around her long body. “No one deserves to die a second time!”

“I’ll kill them myself,” Lucifer hisses, his forked tongue darting out like a snake. “And I won’t lose a single ounce of sleep over it.” Rattle rattle the shaking of a rattlesnake tail rings out as the Devil takes heaving breaths, fire spewing out with each exhale.

Charlie takes a step back, her face back to normal as tears well up in her large, yellow eyes. “Dad, how could you say that?” Hurt is etched into every feature of her face, she hugs her arms. “They’re our people, they’re sinners, just like Mom…” She says, her wavering voice barely above a whisper.

Lucifer immediately drops his fire and horns upon hearing his daughter’s words, his stomach twists in guilt. “Charlie, wait, I- I didn’t mean your mom.” He timidly reaches for her hand. Charlie wrenches her body away from him and runs out of the garden, tears streaming down her face. The twin goats frantically look between Lucifer and the direction of Charlie before bowing deeply to the King and then flying off after her.

Lucifer stands alone in the garden, staring in the path Charlie ran off to. He looks around the garden, the silence is back, and it is deafening. At least, it starts to rain, taking up some of the quiet.

Notes:

…freaking yikes. Um. This is awkward, okay hoping it picks up in the next chapter, leave a comment if y’all are enjoying the story so far.

Onwards…

Chapter 14: Not Here, but Never Gone

Summary:

The Knight siblings decide how they want to remember their late sister.

Notes:

Hey y’all, well once again, I got emotional writing this chapter. I’d like to think that this is how my loved ones will handle me leaving unexpectedly. BUT I also plan on stay on this hellscape we call Earth until my cat crosses the veil so at least 20 years, so we’re good.

Enjoy!

Date: August 30, 2018

Age: 19

Location: Lake Gaston, NC Lake Gaston Baptist Church

Weather: Beautiful partly cloudy day, perfect for a day at the family lake house

Current Condition: Sojourner’s Homegoing Celebration

 

Matthias stands quietly near the entrance of the old church house as relatives and loved ones somberly march in. The organist plays a melody that drags on in his ears as the sound of vistors weep loudly. His uncle stands at the front of the table where Sojourner’s urn sits as he shakes hands and accepts hugs from guests, thanking them for coming.

It was all so…sad, bleak, depressing as a funeral should be, right? This is how “home-goings” are, they’re respectful and everyone speaks in hushed voices and hold each other while they cry. All by the book as it should. But it just doesn’t sit right with the college freshman, this pressed black suit doesn’t feel right on his body. Black doesn’t look right on any of his family members, especially his brother and sisters.

‘Blue works best on your skin, baby.’ Matthias hears his Sojourner’s voice, ‘Any color to match that loud spirit of yours!’ He sees her dimpled smile shine in her eyes, he feels her small, calloused hands squish his cheeks to a funny expression. ‘Let ‘em see you, make ‘em hear you!’ Matthias gets a mischievous grin on his face as he pulls his silk tie off.

Harmony looks down at her doll in her lap and rubs the water stains that now decorate Sojourner’s face. She feels a hand gently touch her shoulder and she looks up to a relative she doesn’t recognize. Condolence is offered, she politely thanks them, and they move on. Dark brown eyes look at the slideshow of her late sister, a montage of hugs the two shared, a dance tournament won, Halloween. In every picture that passes, it's almost as if Sojourner is going to poke her head and chant “Cha-Cha, I love you!” In the traditional 1-2-cha-cha-cha rhythm she’s always done since Harmony could crawl. Tears begin to sting at her eyes, “So-Jo, love you too.” The youngest chants to herself. 

A hand grabs her elbow and pulls her up from the front pew. Matthias yanks his baby sister to the back room of the church where he’s gathered the rest of his siblings and begins to rummage through his backpack. His family stares at him confused, Queen speaks first. “Tide, what are you doing?” Fatigue heavy in the eldest sister’s voice.

Matthias tosses her a turquoise shirt with bejeweled beads decorated on the bodice, a ripped burgundy Panic! At the Disco is launched at Elijah’s face. A lavender Converse tank is shoved in Aura’s hands while Dezzi barely catches a sunflower patterned halter- top. The youngest boy turns to his little sister and holds up a pink, green, and light blue tie dye hippie shirt, waiting for her to accept it. Harmony takes the garment and presses it to her face, the fabric smells like peach and hibiscus, it smells like Sojo.

Matthias takes a deep breath, “I’m not going to celebrate my sister being stuffed in a stiff suit that I don’t like.” He declares, making quick work of his gray button up. “These are some of her favorite shirts that she owns, or we’ve given or made for her.” Chucking down the offending garment, he pulls on a navy-blue shirt that reads U.S. NAVY on the front, the back sports a black dragon, a blue dragon, and a gold dragon each with their heads tilted up to shoot the number 126 in flames. Her bootcamp divisional pride shirt.

“She wants us to be comfortable and to have a piece of her with us.” Matthias continues, “She wants us to play the music that makes people dance or at least sing along!”

The second oldest sister steps forward and held Matthias’ shoulder, “Tide, this is a very sweet gesture but that may upset the people out there,” Dezzi starts.

“I’m not here for the other people! I’m here to celebrate my sister!” Matthias yanks his shoulder back. “If they know Sojo like the way their boo-hooin’ claims they do, then there shouldn’t be a problem!” he crosses his arms with a confident smirk. “Why are you all standing there? Put on your shirts!” The young man commands, clapping his hands to get them moving. “C’mon we have a playlist to build!” 

The siblings tearfully smile at one another and excuse themselves to get dressed. Matthias hears a sniffle behind him and turns to see Harmony, her mocha skin turning red as she quietly sobs into the shirt. He pulls her into a tight embrace and buries his nose into her hair. Her shoulders shake as she cries harder, Matthias squeezes her tighter. “Cha-Cha, I love you.” His voice breaks as he chants, tears threatening to fall.

“Tidas, love you too.” Harmony chants back, wrapping her arms around his torso. The brother and sister hug for a minute longer before finally pulling away, meeting each other’s red, puffy eyes. “Let’s go make some trouble.” Harmony sniffles and nods, a smile finally breaking through.

The somber attitude of the sanctuary is disturbed when the Knight children rush out of the back room, sporting wild hairstyles and new wardrobes, they run and skip through the aisles and pews shouting for everyone to get out of their seats. Their uncle stands stunned then breaks into a fit of roaring laughter.

“Y’all hear them! Up out yer seats!” His heavy southern accent rings out over the congregation, “These, these youngins got the right idea about them, and if you knew our baby girl, she wouldn’t want all this weepin’ and wailing, this is a celebration!” The crowd stands up, smiles and laughter catching on like wildfire, they cheer in agreement.

The church speaker snaps on, the reverb is loud as the volume is adjusted to a more tolerable volume. Michael Jackson’s Don’t Stop Til You Get Enough intro begins to play as Matthias runs up to the podium and throws his arms around his uncle, pulling him into a hug. Leaning into the microphone, he begins to speak.

“We would love to thank everyone who came from near, far and across the sea to come see our sister home!” Matthias starts, his uncle handing him the microphone. He slides Sojourner purple aviators onto his round face, “It’s easy to get caught up in the negative of the situation, I know, but if you had the blessing to meet Sojo even once, on a good day,” The last quip makes the crowd laughs, comments chiming in on past experiences. “Then you know, she would encourage you to stand on your tippy toes, her words, to try and get a glimpse of a bright side. Because there always is a bright side, right?”

“AMEN!” The crowd agrees, more cheers ring out.

“And if you couldn’t see it right then and there, Sojo would say ‘Try again, I’ll give you a boost!’” Matthias continues, getting his rhythm. “And would physically reach down, hands ready, to give you a boost!”

“AMEN!” The people shout, dancing spilling out into the aisles.

“But now, it’s our turn to boost her up! It’s our time to be the bright side she always said was there!” Crying, cheering, and clapping erupts through the building. The church band play along with the song. Matthias looks upwards, a wavering smile on his face.

“Sojo, we will see you later, and wherever you are in the cosmos right now. I know you are changing the tides. We love you and don’t you worry about us, we’re gonna be alright!” Matthias voice breaks for the second time, “We’ll miss you.” He can’t stop the tears from falling as a sob racks his body. His brother and sisters make their way to the front and surround him. Hands from all around are placed on their shoulders and backs as wave after wave of prayers enclose around them.

The celebration travels from the church to the family lake house, where a second reunion takes place. Barbecue, games, and good tunes continue as the Knight family meet the friends Sojourner made in life, building new bonds. Stories are passed around late into the night as the party quiets down to only family remaining. Matthias sleeps on Elijah’s shoulder and Harmony sits in Dezzi’s lap sleeping just as hard. Today hurt, but it’s still a great day. 

Notes:

I’ve found that one of the best way to process grief is to share with others. Helps you realize that you’re not alone in the process. Still hurts like a son a bitch though!

I love y’all!

Onwards!

Chapter 15: A Mild Disagreement

Summary:

They’re fighting, I do not know what they’re fighting about, but they fightin’

Notes:

This is my first fight scene I’ve ever written and I wanted to make sure to be fair as possible. How did I achieve this? D&D dice. Thank god for D&D.

Date: July 16, 2018

Age: 100 years old, give or take

Location: Entertainment District of Pentagram City

Weather: Violent

Current Conditions: The girls are fighting.

 

The street in front of Old Shit Antique’s is strangely vacant despite it being early in the evening. No cars transit the road, no demon nor hellborn roam about, going on with their own personal day. The only sounds that play are the simple jingles from commercials on display televisions.

“Loo-Loo Land, Loo-Loo Land. Come spend your cash down at Loo-Loo La-” CRASH! SHATTER! Tink, tink, tink. A body flies through the window of the display T.V.s, destroying everything in its path.

“Really now, old pal, don’t you know it’s distasteful to keep pursuing after being turned down?” A static-laced voice asks from the center of the street. Alastor inspects the tear on his red, pin-stripped coat, the arm is partially torn at the shoulder. “You’ll become quite unpopular if you keep up this behavior.” Glass scrunches as his opponent begins to move in the rubble.

“F-fuck you, Alastor,” Vox coughs, pushing a 60” monitor off his body. He sits up, blood pixels streaming from his mouth, his screen cracked on the upper left corner. “Too cough fucking caught up in the past to see the best opportunity wheeze is right in front of you!” The biomechanic demon stands up, clutching his right side where blood is starting to stain the yellow turtleneck. Climbing through the shattered window, he glares at the red-clad demon and walks back to the street. Alastor’s smile widens menacingly, his clasped hands patiently tapping the head of his cane.

“I said ‘no’.” Alastor states bluntly.

Vox lets out an enraged roar and lunges at Alastor, swiping at him with his blue claws. Alastor side-steps, watching Vox narrowly miss and roll, landing swiftly back on his feet. The red demon swings his cane at the T.V. Demon’s head, which Vox evades at the last second. The blue demon retaliates by launching his body at his foe, attempting to tackle him. Alastor dips into the shadows, making Vox land hard on his chest, chipping part of his chin on the concrete. Vox’s body burns with anger as he begins to push himself up.

A shadow figure appears underneath him and grabs his forearms, yanking him back down to a face-plant. CRUNCH The thick glass of Vox’s screen takes another heavy blow, a crack now obscuring the image of his right eye. The shadow makes a warbling sound that mirrors the sound of Alastor’s echoing laughter. Vox surges and digs his claws into the shadow’s arms. It lets out a surprised yelp that quickly turns to a scream as Vox expels volts of electricity into it. Alastor appears at Vox’s side and kicks him hard, his trademark smile almost a snarl as animosity radiates in the Radio Demon’s feedback.

The kick sends Vox flying three blocks down the street before he lands hard on his injured side and rolls a few more feet. Desperately fighting to get air back into his lungs, he shakily pulls himself up to all fours. He reaches around his middle and hisses as he touches his wound, his hand drips red with blood when he inspects it.

“I’ve tried being patient with you, dear.” Alastor says, sauntering up the street. “I even gave you the privilege of explaining myself, which I normally never do.” Vox sits back on his knees with his head hung, not looking at the danger approaching him. Thunder booms overhead as the wind picks up. “I would have hoped that after the third. Time. Asking. You would eventually get the point, but unfortunately, you seem to be a lost cause.” Raindrops begin to fall, the corrosive water stinging Vox's wound through his thick, yellow sweater. “Not to mention, I really don’t take kindly to anyone thinking they can lay their hand on me.” Alastor’s red scleras turn pitch black as his pupils form into ticking dials. “So, as fun as this was, dear friend, I’m afraid this is where we say-” Alastor’s voice is cut short by a sharp choke.

Blue and black striped cables protrude from the television demon’s back and coil tightly around the deer demon’s neck as red nails claw in vain to pry them loose. Blue sparks leap from Vox as more cables lift his body off the ground taking Alastor’s struggling form with him. The cables bring Alastor eye level to their owner as Vox finally lifts his head, a deranged smile plasters his overly bright screen. “00h Ala$-stOr, m-My dE@r, DeAR, A-A-Al@s-s-T0r.” Vox’s voice glitches in cadence with the imaging on his screen. “1 @m D0-NE AS-ASK1Ng!!” The rain now pours sideways, blinding Alastor with its acidity. Lightning flashes brightly. CRACK! BOOOOOM! Thunder claps a short distance away as a strong gust of wind begins to throw debris and trash into the air. “I-! KN-KN0W WHAT’$ B3$T F0-F0R Y-0U! Trust me.” Grabbing hold of the red demon’s shoulders, Vox leans in as his left eye begins to pulsate his hypnotic pattern.

A thin black trail of drool drips from Alastor’s mouth as the pressure behind his eyes skyrockets. Seeing Vox’s hypnosis, he quickly screws his own eyes shut, his smile now an upturned snarl. He tries turning away, but the cables hold him fast.

“Look at me, Alastor.” Vox commands, “Look at and obey me.” The acid rain slams down in waves as the harsh wind continues blowing. CRAAAAASSH! The thunder is under a mile away, rumbling ominously.

The demand makes indignity flare hot in Alastor’s chest as his eyes snap open against his will. The red dials return to his eyes as a grim, green aura emits from his long, thin body. SCREEEEEEEEEE! A shrill feedback pierces Vox’s audio, stunning him just long enough for Alastor to bite through the now loose cable around his neck. An anguished scream rips from Vox’s throat, his blue claws tearing deep gashes into Alastor’s arms. A pained hiss jumps from Alastor as a slimy, black tendril juts from his back and veers around to stab through Vox through his face.

Vox recovers just in time to move his head as the tentacle slides past him. With a vicious snarl, he pulls Alastor into a tight hold, the radio demon’s curved nose pressed against his cracked screen. “OBEY ME!” He bellows, his eye pulsates at an incredible rate. Alastor’s head spins as his control is snatched away from him, his limbs turn to lead as he feels Vox pulling him in. ‘Turn away!’ Panic builds as his head does not obey his thoughts ‘CLOSE YOUR EYES’ It’s no use, his body begins to relax in Vox’s hold, his eyes grow heavy as his breathing slows.

“Mmm… ngh,” A drowsy groan is all Alastor can muster as he fights to keep his head upright. The world spins in his vision.

“Th-th@‘s riGHt, mY, dar-DaRL1Ng, L3-let g0.” Vox croons gently, feeling his hold slip into Alastor’s mind.

“N-no…” Alastor’s voice thick with distress signals, “N-nooo…” His head falls forward onto Vox’s shoulder. The rain stings the gash wounds on his arms, but it’s not enough to wake him.

Vox maneuvers Alastor’s limp form to carry him bridal style, he looks lovingly into Alastor’s eyes, his hypnosis pattern fully engulfing Alastor’s half-lidded gazeas Vox begin to lower the two back down. CRRRRAAAACCCKKK A bolt of lightning shoots down, striking Vox’s cables, electrocuting both demons. The pair crashes to the ground, Alastor’s body rolls away as Vox strikes the hard ground first, his screen powering off. The two demons lie smoldering in the street, unconscious, as the rain begins to slow. Minutes pass before the ping of a T.V. switches on, Vox opens his left eye, the right corner of his face pixels missing, blackened from damage.

“Nnnggghhh,” a low moan distorts from his speakers as he turns his head to Alastor, lying still in the wet street. “Al?” Vox cautiously asks, trying in vain to roll to his side as he feels blood pouring out of his bitten cable and his side. “A-Alas cough, COUGH! Alastor?” He weakly calls, a red ear twitches. Relief floods through Vox’s chest, 'He's still alive'. “Al, wake up.” Pushing through the blinding pain, Vox rolls to his front and slowly rises to his feet, limping towards the red deer. Wheeze "Al.” Holding his side, he reaches his free hand out towards Alastor’s body.

The stench of burnt fur is the first sense that Alastor registers as he slowly regains consciousness. Scuff sliiiide, scuff sliiiiide, scuff sliiiide. The sound of shoes dragging against wet pavement becomes gradually louder, he hears a glitch- ridden voice “-astor. Alastor!” Vox, he hears Vox’s voice right on top of him. Vox! A buck cry rings out as Alastor shoots up from the ground, tendrils lash towards the voice blindly. “Alast-” Vox’s voice stops short as a tendril pierces his stomach. Alastor is stunned; his smile stretched into a shocked grimace.

Vox looks at Alastor with his arm still outstretched, just about to touch his shoulder before his gaze trails down to his middle at the invading limb. He looks back to Alastor, the tendril slowly retracts back to its owner, blood immediately drenching the yellow sweater. “Al?” Vox gently asks as he drops to his knees and falls over. The T.V. Demon’s screen powers off. Alastor stares at the bleeding body and pulls in a shaky breath. Huff, huf. Darkness envelopes the radio demon and he sinks into the shadows. A pair of eyes watches the aftermath.

‘Interesting.’

Notes:

I bought a 3 pack of dice specifically for this. Alastor’s set is green and Vox is of course blue. The first half Alastor was rolling disrespectfully high like 18 vs 4 and he was about to deliver a killing blow so I say “Alastor fuckin’ chill I need this fight to last, Vox, babe, fight back” and then the remaining rolls I couldn’t get Alastor to roll higher than a 12 and Vox didn’t get lower than a 16. When Vox was winning the hypnosis, Alastor rolled a 17 and I was all “Fuck yes, break free!” and then Vox rolled a Nat 20 and I said “Damn, Alastor I’m sorry, baby, you goin’ under.” but i needed the fight to end in a draw so I used the third dice set and rolled against Vox’s 16 and got a Nat 20 so I zapped their asses. That was the most fun I’ve ever had writing.

10/10 use dice to write action scenes.

Chapter 16: Semper Fi(ght) Club

Summary:

A training montage has taken place, and Sojourner is at end of her final obstacle course before Gunny deems her field combat ready. The months past has definitely brought the two closer together with a new level of respect and possibly something else.

Notes:

Heeeeey, y’all I’m sorry for the long wait, I was returning from school and the travel back wore me out. Plus I have a friend that I’ve known since boot camp over so foolishness is running rampant in my house and I can’t get enough of it. My goal is to post at least one chapter a week, so look for more consistency in the future.

Date: February 19, 2019

Age: Deader longer (36 years old)

Location: Doomsday District

Weather: A fine day for ass-kicking activities

Current Conditions: 54 hours into seeing if this squid got that dog in her

 

11 years is a long time for anyone. In 11 years, the body has replaced all its cells and produced new ones to become a brand-new person, physically. Now whether the soul grows with the body is another matter to consider. Some, if not most, people never change, and it is easy to predict how they live or what values they hold. But once in a blue moon, a small portion of the some, break the mold.

Chester Pultzer has always known what he is made of. His family is a tapestry of heroes: his grandfather, Vietnam veteran; his uncle, a paratrooper in Korea; his mother, a Marine, the driving force to how he, himself, became a Marine. A legacy of excellence, grit, and sacrifice. That is what makes him who he is. Strength, determination, guts, taking no prisoners, this is how wars are won. That is what makes a Marine. Sure, the other branches did their share, but if a fight needs to get fought, send a Marine. Anyone else who doesn’t have it in them, go to roll in dirt,  play pirates, or join the chair force. Those that think they have it in them, go to play pretend pirates on the home front. No, a Marine knows they are a Marine when they walk into the recruiting office.

So, what the fuck is this 5’1” build-a-bear doing proving him wrong?

The 6’2” Master Gunnery Sergeant parries another strike thrown by the First Class Petty Officer. Grabbing her arm with one hand and her torn shirt with the other, he flips and slams the small woman hard onto the ground. She throws her free arm down to dispel some of the shock of her landing, a pained yelp leaping from her mouth. Gunny kneels to straddle her chest, putting her in his guard, but she turns her body to the side and bucks her hips before he has a chance to sit, throwing him forward and off balance.

Gunny lets go of Sojourner’s arm to catch himself before he takes a nose-dive into the ground, instinctively squeezing his knees together and trapping her. Sojourner tries to scoot her body further down but is stopped as Gunny quickly regains balance and grips both her wrists with one of his gigantic hands, putting his full weight on her ribs, squeezing air out of her body.

The small bear goes to bite the hand that holds her wrists, but Gunny yanks her to lie on her back, her arms pinned above her head. Gunny draws back and drops his elbow into her ribs, CRACK! Sojourner cries out in agonizing pain. Gunny winces at the pain he just inflicted, he draws back his arm again. Letting out an enraged scream, Sojourner digs her heels into the dirt and bucks her hips with all her remaining strength, throwing the 245-pound German Shepherd further forward to land face first into the dirt. Sojourner quickly rolls to her stomach and yanks her hands free.

Gunny recovers quickly and turns to face her, furiously rubbing the dirt off his pointed face, spitting out dust. Sojourner grabs fistfuls of dirt and launches her body at Gunny, knocking him flat on his back. She smears the dirt in his eyes before putting him in her guard and throwing a fury of punches to his head, releasing a war cry. Gunny roars and blindly throws a punch. Sojourner leans back and dodges the attack, she catches his thick arm and pulls it into a tight hold, swinging her legs to wrap around his shoulder and falls to Gunny’s side, executing an arm-bar. He shouts in pain as Sojourner squeezes her thighs and presses her hips up, cranking the joint. SLAP, SLAP, SLAP! The Marine smacks her leg. She quickly releases his arm and lets hers fall to her sides. The pair lie together with their chests heaving, the occasional sniff interrupting the cadence. Minutes tick by before a soft voice breaks the silence.

“Did I pass?” Sojourner asks, lifting her head to look at Gunny’s face, his eyes are closed, still blind with dirt.

COUGH COUGH! “Yeah gal, ya passed.” Gunny confirms, sitting up and moving his injured arm from Sojourner’s legs. He lets out a sharp hiss as he slowly bends it. “Fuck.” He curses under his breath; he hears Sojourner get up and walk a short distance away, her footsteps returning to his side after rummaging through their bags.

“Tilt your head back,” Sojourner orders, unscrewing the top to her canteen. “Gonna rinse your eyes.” Her voice carries a heavy wheeze. Gunny complies and leans his head back, feeling the warm water glide over his eyes. After a few rinses, he blinks his eyes open, Sojourner’s face is close as she inspects his eyes, turning his head left and right to ensure there is no dirt left in his tear ducts. She wipes the water away from his face as one of her loose braids brush his jaw. The Marine feels his face heat up slightly, from over exertion, obviously.

“How do I look, doc?” He jokes, looking away.

“Mmmm, still ugly as hell, so you good.” She gives his nose a gentle shove as she stands up fully, taking a swig out of the warm canteen. “Ugh, damn that’s nasty.” She chokes as she offers the canteen to her companion; he accepts it and dumps the rest of the water into his mouth, swishing it around before he spits out mud. 

“That’s hot.” Sojourner monotones, offering a hand to help Gunny up. He takes it and watches in amusement as she uses her whole body to pull him up, Gunny chokes back a laugh. The pair grab their things and limp back to their van, the 54-hour long final exam finally over. Sojourner climbs into the passenger seat as Gunny sits in the driver seat with a heavy flop. A tired silence sits between the two. 

“Hey.” His gruff voice speaks, Sojourner turns her head to him, pulling out her ruined bun. He gives her a proud smile, “Ya did good, really good.”

Her red and green eyes illuminate as a bright smile takes over. “Thanks for training me!” She bounces in her seat, “Now, let’s go home, my ribs are broken!” The van kicks over and soft rock plays over the radio as Gunny drives back to the workshop. Sojourner is dead asleep by the time he pulls into the garage, her mouth hangs open and one eye slightly open.

‘She’s an ugly sleeper’ The marine thinks, judging her with a grimace.

His wagging tail says otherwise. 

 

The duo wake up the next morning battered, bruised, and sore. Sojourner’s five broken ribs and Gunny’s overextended elbow are reasons enough for the two to decide that a day off or two of recovery couldn’t hurt.  They sit on the couch dozing off as the tv drones on, every time Sojourner takes a breath there’s a high-pitched wheeze. Gunny’s arm is propped up on pillows with frozen vegetables icing down the swelling as he sips from a cold beer reclining in his armchair, he hears the crinkle of Sojourner’s ice pack as she readjusts it to another portion of her ribs. 

 

Frowning, he asks, “Still hurts to breathe?” Snapping her out of the trance of the tv.

 

”Hm? Oh, yeah, but it’s all cool.” Her voice carries a low rasp as she smiles a little, “Just hope this won’t make my migraines start up again.” Another wheeze trails her sentence. 

 

“Migraines? Ya get migraines?” Gunny asks, raising an eyebrow.

 

Nodding, ”Mhmm I got them constantly when I was alive.” She answers, “I have, well, had a neuro condition that gave me a bunch of migraines, vision problems, motion sickness, and seizures n’ blackouts, y’know just the works.” She rattles off her symptoms on her fingers. “But come to think of it, I haven’t had one since coming down here, which is insane because intense temperatures also set them off, same with noise and lights. And I’ve thrown a lot of flashbangs since then.” She smiles to herself and raps her knuckles against the coffee table, “Better knock on wood, heh.” Laughing to herself, she glances at the Marine, surprised at the horrified expression on his face. “The fuck’s up withchu?” The marine blinks in disbelief.

 

”Couple things: 1. Sinners are dead, so whatever bullshit you had going on while livin’, ya don’t got to worry ‘bout down here. 2. How in the shit were ya still in the Navy?” Gunny exclaims, “How were ya not med-sepped?” He winces as pushes the footrest down on his armchair, slightly disturbing his injury. “How long did ya have them issues?”

 

”In general or after a proper diagnosis?” Sojourner asks, tilting her head. 

 

Gunny sputters, “Knight, what the fu-”

 

“Because before it was… a year and a half. I suddenly had lost consciousness and dropped on the street, they said it was vertigo. Fuckin’ idiots.” Sojourner interrupts him, lost in thought. “And then, when the Navy changed and we could sue Navy docs for malpractice, they finally took me seriously and said I had spinal hypertension. I’ve had that diagnosis for…” She looks to the ceiling doing some mental math, “Gosh, I died in last year? Eight years.”

 

”And ya had been in for how long at that point?” Gunny asks, leaning forward.

 

”Almost 12 years, I joined at 18, started fainting at 20/ 21, got diagnosed at 22, and died at 30.” Sojourner lets a deep cough, wincing at pain. “Took me forever to get the docs to listen to me. They just kept telling me to lose weight and drink water.” Sojourner tenses up as her eyes instantly go distant, “I wasn’t overweight or anything, I just couldn’t exercise like I used to before because I would pass out, and my chain of command wouldn’t let me go on the flight line or a jet after the third time I passed out, so then I just rotted in the shop, but I still watched what I ate and-”

 

“Woah gal, easy up!” Gunny holds his hand up, taken aback by her sudden shift in demeanor, “I didn’t accuse ya of nothing, and I didn't think that neither.” Sojourner refuses to meet his eyes, hugging the ice pack tighter to her. “I know you take care of yerself,” He gently readjusts his arm to a more comfortable position. “Most people wouldn’t take on the training you just did, let alone one-on-one, so relax, okay?” Sojourner nods silently, another low wheeze leaves her body. 

 

“Sorry,” she mumbles after a few moments of silence.

 

“The hell for?” Gunny replies.

 

“Slippin’ like that, I’ve been workin’ on not doin’ that out loud.” She tosses the nearly melted ice pack on the coffee table and slowly stands up to stretch. “It’s just something I get defensive about and I didn’t mean to dump all that crap on you. Sorry.”

 

Gunny mulls over what she just said and then heaves a heavy sigh, “Listen Squid,” He runs his hand down his face, gathering the rest of his thoughts, “We’ve known each other for a minute.”

 

”A hot minute at the very least.” Sojourner interjects.

 

”Dare I say two minutes at best.” The marine snorts, “I dunno who broke ya down that bad when ya were alive, but fuck ‘em.” He gives her a hard look. “Ya need to free yerself from whatever bullshit they crammed into those braids of yers cuz it ain’t you, it ain’t never been you, and ain’t never gonna be you.” Sojourner looks into Gunny’s green eyes and smiles warmly.

 

”I thought emotional crap wasn’t your forte.” She teases, watching Gunny’s hackles bristle.

 

’This lil shit’  “I ain’t bein’ ‘motional, jus’ sharin’ what I know!” Gunny shoots back, looking away flustered. Sojourner laughs, she loves when he gets embarrassed like this, that hard shell he puts up going soft for just a moment, allowing her to see Chester and not the Marine. 

 

“Hey,” She calls softly.

 

”Hmm.” Gunny grunts, still refusing to look at her.

 

”Thanks for that, I mean it.” Sojourner relaxes back on the couch, “I may be damned, but you make it suck less.”

 

Gunny spares a glance over to the small bear, she’s settled in a comfortable position watching the t.v. again. His heart squeezes in his chest uncomfortably as he studies her face. ‘Fuck, I’m in trouble.’

 

”No problem, gal.”

Notes:

Y’all someone caught some feeelings :3 Will they be reciprocated or will Gunny hold onto them like a dumb, emotionally constipated adult? Find out in later updates!

Med-sepped or medical separation: when a service is removed from service due to injury or illness. The service members is placed on limited duty or LIMDU until a medical board is able to deem them able or unable to continue duty. They get to keep their benefits and are enrolled in VA healthcare.

Onwards!

Chapter 17: Rosas Rojos

Summary:

A glimpse in Sojourner's naval life and getting to know one of the most important people in the world to her. Antonio Rojas, her mentoree.

CW: Death in family, mention of domestic abuse, implication of assualt, Su*c*de in the military.

Notes:

Hey yall! Happy New Year and I hope the holidays for kind to you! Here is the next installment of Sojourner history while she was alive!

Line Shack: a workcenter in a squadron where most airmen that a brand new to the Navy go to learn the basics of jet care and flight schedule. They're basically the grunts of the squadron but I love the shit out of them. They do the jobs I REALLY don't want to do anymore.

Plane Captain (PC): A qualification most if not all squadron aviation member earn. This is the person the pilot will watch to turn on the jet for take off. YouTube it, they wear brown jerseys on the flight deck.

Skipper: the commanding officer of a Navy command, big or small.

Date: March 24, 2015

Age: 26 years old

Location: Yokosuka, Japan Squadron VFX-104 The Archangels

Weather: Brisk morning, but will warm up slightly in the afternoon

Current Conditions: Saving a dumbass airman from himself

 

AV2 Knight walks backs to the hangar after a successful first recovery, unstrapping her green cranial and removing her goggles. She pulls off her black leather gloves and stuffs them in the tool pouch wrapped around her waist. Entering through the wide bay doors, Sojourner hears a bucket clattering against the line shack door and pauses. A tall, young man bursts out of the door, swearing under his breath as he crosses her path, narrowly missing her. 

“ROJAS, FUCKING GET BACK HERE!” AD2 Burns calls, the staunch woman hot on the junior sailor’s heels.  Rojas ignores her, his long legs carrying him faster out the bay doors to the flight line. Burns stops at the border of the hangar bay and stares after the fuming airman.

”Havin’ fun, Mo?” Sojourner asks, strolling up to her friend, cranial tucked under her arm. “That the new baby?” She points her chin to Rojas, who stomps further down the flight line. The fellow second-class sighs heavily.

“Yeah, fuckin’ kid, hard headed as shit and has the worst attitude I’ve ever seen in my whole goddamn career!” Burns crosses her arms against his chest and eyebrows furrowed.

”Really?” Sojourner rolls her eyes up towards her, a smile pulling at her mouth, “He’s the worst?” Nudging her friend, hoping for a smile. Blue eyes cut to the side to look at her friend and scoffs.

”…No, you were the absolute worst,” Burns grins, nudging her back. “You were the first person I’ve seen to actually knuck after bucking. To a senior chief no less.”

”Damn straight, you betta respect the player, baby.” Sojourner laughs, she settles her weight on her left hip and winces a sharp pain shooting across her back. “So what’s this kid’s problem anyway? Doesn’t like the line shack or somethin’?” She watches Rojas climb up aircraft 412 and begin prepping the cockpit for the next go, anger displayed in every moment.

”What isn't his problem? He’s been here for two months and is angry as fuck everyday.” Burns huffs, “He picks up shit fast, but argues with everything anyone says! Talks back to the shack leader, hates doin' grunt work, even if its good quality, is impatient with everything!” The engine mechanics lists each grievance on of her fingers. "Barely listens to me because of the stick up his ass."

”What’s his rate?” She asks, raising an eyebrow as Rojas roughly wipes down the canopy.

”Doesn’t have one, he's undes.” Burns pulls out a blue canister, popping a dip in making Sojourner grimace. She notices, “Oh shut up, it’s been a stressful day.” She quips defensively.

GASP!  ”Whaaaat? The Navy is stressful? Oh mah gawd!” Sojourner mocks in her best Jennifer Coolidge impression. Burns spits a bit of her chew out, suppressing a laugh. “Stress is so bad for your skiiin. And just…baaad.” Sojourner continues, Burns doubles over covering her mouth to keep the rest of her dip in.

"Girl, you are so stupid.” The shack supervisor chuckles, Sojourner gives her a wide, cheeky grin. “Thanks, I needed that.”

"I’m here for you, hon.” Sojourner blows a kiss at her friend and pulls her cranial back on, strapping it. Burns raises an eyebrow inquisitively.

"Wait, where are you going?” Burns asks, watching her.

"Gonna go see what’s chafin' this kid’s ass,” Sojourner answers, checking her tool pouch and fishing her gloves out. She turns to Burns to verify her pouch while she pulls her gloves on.

"Good to go,” Burns confirms, slapping Sojourner’s butt and sending her off. “Lemme know if you can glean anything from that piece’o’ work.”

Walking back to 412, Sojourner calls back. “Baby, I’ll try, no promises.”

Approaching the jet, Sojourner shields her eyes from the sun as she looks up to the airman. He doesn't notice the visitor as he angrily cleans the windshield, mumbling curses under his breath. "Sup?” The second-class greets, her voice jolts him out of his silent tantrum, quickly cutting his rant short. He peers down past his hip to find the voice, when their eyes meet Sojourner smiles up at him brightly. 

“Good afternoon, petty officer.” Rojas grouches, using a clean cloth to dry the glass to a shine.

"Ugh, no, my name is Knight, AV2 if ya wanna be fancy about it.” Sojourner shudders. She pulls out her door tool and begins opening up the ab bays to check circuit breakers. “You the plane captain for this bird?”

"This is the spare and no, don’t got the qualification yet.” Rojas grumbles, walking up the leading edge extension to inspect the jet for any discrepancies. He takes his time carefully going over every surface panel for any missing fasteners. 

"How close are ya?” Sojourner asks, pushing in essential breakers and looking for any errors.

"48%.” Rojas answers, walking back, taking as much time as he did on the way down.

”How long you been here?” She asks as she walks the bottom portion of the jet, ensuring nothing is awry. 

”Got here at the end of December.” Rojas huffs, getting annoyed with this line of questioning.

”And you’re already at 48%?” Sojourner asks, impressed. “Holy shit.”

”I didn’t gundeck anything!” Rojas snaps defensively. “I’ve done everything by the book!”

”Have you done a shadow launch yet?” Sojourner asks, choosing to ignore the outburst. She signs her portion of the flight mission card for when the pilot arrives and puts her pen away, looking up at him.

”No.” Rojas huffs, “No one wants to launch with me.” He looks away angrily, his fist are balled tightly to his side.

”You want to?” Sojourner offers walking into his view, shielding her eyes again. "I don't have to final check on this next launch." Rojas looks at her and frowns.

”You’re not in line shack.” Rojas argues, crossing his arms.

”Hell naw, but I am a Plane Captain.” Sojourner counters, “I got my PC when I was your rank, studied while I was in the AV shop and never had to go to line shack, fuck that noise.” She shakes her head, “That shit always looked miserable, especially on the boat.”

”I thought all airmen went straight to the line shack,” Rojas says, looking thoughtful. “Getting your PC kept you out of there?”

”That and staying hungry.” Sojourner confirms, “I walked into the shop and told them that they weren’t going to waste my time like my last command. If they wanted peace, they were going to teach me everything they know. Walked in an airmen, now I’m a second- class.” She looks up at Rojas, grinning proudly. “So, whatadya say? Walk me through the setup, pre-flight brief, and a mock launch. If I like what I see, you can shadow me, deal?”

Rojas cracks a small smile. “Deal.”

___________________

An hour and half later

The launch goes beautifully, the skipper of the squadron is impressed by the young airman’s ability and applauds as the jet taxis to the runway. Sojourner walks up to Rojas and bumps him with her hip, grinning up at him. "Good shit, guy, nicely done!” She congratulates him.

Rojas beams at her. ”He clapped! Did you see him?” He asks excitedly. “I didn’t miss a single step!”

"I saw,” Sojourner laughs, surprised at the complete shift in attitude, “You’ll be a PC in no time.”

”Will you tell AD2 that I did a launch?” Rojas asks as he leans over her with excitement. “And will you be with me on the next go? Can I shadow you again?” Sojourner raises his hands to slow him down.

”Yooooo, go easy, you can tell her when we go back inside. And yes, I’ll be with you on the next go, okay?” The youngster bounces as his excitement becomes infectious. “And I‘ll sign off this launch on your training record.” His smile grows.

”You will? Thank you!” The airman practically skips past her as the two begin walking back to the hangar. 

Sojourner grins, his energetic behavior reminds her of her little brother, Matthias, who’s waiting for her back in the states. ‘I know those two would be friends.’

Under Sojourner’s mentorship, Rojas earned his PC qualification in just a few short weeks and by the end of the year, earned Plane Captain of the year for the Archangels. These were the first of many memories and victories the two would share. From Rojas striking AV and joining Sojourner in her work center, to her pinning his first chevron on his chest when he made third-class. Rojas became Sojourner's pride and joy, and she became his hero. When she was meritoriously promoted to first class, he was up in front and cheering the loudest. The squadron was a tight-knit command, respect was mutual between senior and junior sailors as well as enlisted and commissioned. There was no shortage of camaraderie and friendship among the them.  Sojourner and Rojas were well known as a dynamic duo, one was hardly seen without the other. It was obvious how much Sojourner cared and looked after the young AV and how much he looked up to her. 

 

Rojas shared everything with Sojourner; his dreams, fears, secrets, and eventually, his pain, knowing she would listen and accept him with an open heart. He was able to come out of his shell and slowly told her about the broken home he grew up in with his oldest sister being his only support and sanctuary. Elana was the one positive in the young man’s life, she worked hard to ensure her little brother would have some semblance of joy in his life. She was the one who encouraged him to join the military, believing he would excel if he had some structure and guidance. 

________________________

Deployment onboard CVN-86 The Dutchman

“She never gave up on me, even when I was fucking up in school and getting in trouble all the time.” Rojas tells Sojourner one late summer afternoon in the smoke pit. He takes a pull from his vape and adjusts his sunglasses against the blaring sun. Leaning on the edge of the railing, he watches the water slosh against the side of the ship. “She was so… happy about everything, even though we had to go home to bullshit everyday.” Sojourner stares up at him, listening intently. “I remember the day I left for bootcamp, she snuck us out because my parents were trying to sabotage my chances to join.” He takes a deep breath and holds his hands up like he’s holding something precious, “She held my face in her hands and said “Don’t you worry, I got this! Go be gre-”.”  Rojas’ voice cracks and he quickly clears his throat. “She said “Go be great and I’ll see you soon.”.” Sniff.  

Sojourner eyes widen when his voice gets thick, trying the keep the tears at bay. “Knight, I didn’t even get my first phone call to her, Dad just kept tellin’ me that she was at work or was out. You know we don’t get a lot of phone calls in bootcamp.” Rojas grips the railing trying to steady himself.

“I know, buddy.” Sojourner confirms gently, trying her best to keep her voice steady.

“She… she died. I wasn’t even done with P-days, no one told me.” Tears begin to stream from Rojas’ sunglasses as his shoulders shake. “Those pieces of shit answered her phone and-” He slams his hands on the railing, a loud CLANG rings out on impact. A concerned chief catches Sojourner’s eye, asking if she needs help with him . She gently shakes her head and subtly waves and waves them off. “K-knight, no one came to my graduation, I didn’t know until I left Great Lakes and I bought a phone.” Rojas hiccups as he lays his head against his hands. “They fucking cremated her and didn’t fucking tell me!”.

Sojourner carefully approaches his side and lays her hand on Rojas’ arm, the other circling around his back and pulling him into her embrace. Rojas pulls her into a tight hug and sobs. “I shouldn’t have left her! I should’ve never left her alone! I don’t even know how she died!” Sojourner feels hot tears touching her scalp as Rojas lays his head against hers, continuing to cry. The sailors around them back up to give them space, their hearts wrenching as they overhear the tragic story. Sojourner squeezes him tighter in, letting him cry for as long as he needed. 

From that day onward, she considered him another little brother, promising to always watch over him. That same year, she stayed behind for the holidays and shared her family with him, her siblings eagerly embraced him when she introduced him via SkyTime. They sent him gifts for holidays and birthdays, calling him just to chat and see what he was up to, eventually telling him how much they loved him and accepted him as family. Matthias and Rojas became best friends just like Sojourner thought they would and gamed online whenever time allowed. The anger Rojas held on for so long slowly melted away and confidence took its place, pushing him to higher goals and greater achievements, like Elana always knew he could.

For three years, she watched Rojas grow into a confident, determined sailor, which she had the honor of pinning his second chevron on when he made second-class. He came into his own, becoming a strong, kind leader to his own junior sailors that he enthusiastically took under his wing, just like Sojourner had done with him. Yes, Antonio Rojas rose to become the golden son of the Archangels, his career could only go up from there. Then on their third deployment, the incident happened. The video spread like wildfire on the Dutchman, shaking not only the Archangels, but the entire ship to its core. No one knows who leaked it, but everyone knew the victim, Rojas. On the surface, he held his composure outstandingly well while motions were made to have him removed from the ship for emergency relocation. Sojourner tried everything for Rojas to tell her who did it, but he shook her off every time. Finally, the night before he was to be flown off, Rojas came clean. He left a note for his mentor explaining everything, right before jumping off the ship and drowning himself.

Notes:

Yeesh! Our girl took a hard hit on this one, lost someone who was practically a younger brother to her. Also comes to turn out, Sojourner has a history of anger too. Wonder what that's all about.

On a very serious note, be sure to check up on your loved ones that are serving in the armed forces and those who have served. Resources are available to anyone who is struggling with suicidal ideations and notions. You are not alone.

Chapter 18: Unwanted

Summary:

It's been a few months since the Knight siblings lost their sister, and they been trying very hard to get back to a sense of normal. When unwanted visitors drop in unannounced, the four oldest have to handle it for the sake of the whole family.

Notes:

TW: Domestic violence, implied abusive parents, family fighting

This chapter is rough, confronting toxic family members can be triggering. Anyway a bit more lore into Sojourner's family life.

Date: October 07, 2018 

Age: 33

Location: Greensboro, NC

Weather: Chilly sweater weather

Current Conditions: Being shaken awake by the youngest Knight on a Saturday

Elijah’s eye pops open to see Harmony face level with him as she shakes his shoulder, his body bumping into his still sleeping wife. He squeezes his eye shut as he presses his entire face to his pillow, muffling a yawn.

”Eli.” Harmony whispers, urgently. “Eli, wake up!”

"Cha-Cha?” Eli asks, his face still buried deep in his memory foam pillow. “What is it? Another bad dream?” He lets out a low groan and begins to roll over.

"Is that Harmony?” Aura’s groggy voice cuts in. “Are you okay, baby?”

"Mommy and Daddy are outside!” Harmony answers. “They’re at the front door right now!” Both Elijah and Aura jolt up and stare at her, they share a quick glance before kicking the blankets off. Harmony stands back as she watches her siblings throw on their robes and slippers and grab their phones. Elijah finishes first and heads out the bedroom door, stoping at the closed guest room and knocking frantically.

Dezzi answers. "Eli, what’s wrong?” She covers her yawn with her arm before adjusting her bonnet. “Is it Tide or Cha-Cha?”

"They’re here, get Queen.” Eli answers with a hard look, his wife and baby sister come and join him. He turns to Harmony. “Cha-cha, grab your headphones and head upstairs with Tide. We’ll come get you when we’re done.”

"Come on, honey.” Aura leads Harmony to the stairs of the loft. “I’ll bring you your headphones. If Tide wakes up, tell him to put on his headphones too.”

"No, I can handle this, I want to be down there too!” Harmony protests. “I’m not a little kid anymore!” Eli walks over and places his hands on her shoulders, leaning down to meet her eyes.

"Cha-Cha, I know you’re not a little girl anymore, but you are still a minor and my responsibility, I need you to trust me on this. It is too soon for you and Tide to be dealing with what’s about to go down.” He gently squeezes her shoulders. “You know you’ll get the rundown from us afterwards, but you shouldn’t have to deal with this shit this soon after… after her.”

Harmony feels a familiar lump form in her chest and she nods. “I trust you.” Elijah plants a kiss on her forehead as Aura hands Harmony her glowing, neon headphones, Sojourner’s last birthday gift to her. Harmony turns on the noise canceling mode and looks at her family before heading upstairs to enter Matthias’ bedroom, she closes the door behind her.

The adults head downstairs, Elijah leading the way to the front door and opening it.  A bald, strongly built man with a close shave and rectangular glasses glares down at him. A red hue is visible against his medium brown skin, he’s fuming. A tall, light-skinned woman in a short pencil skirt and a blonde sewn-in stands behind him in 6-inch heels, her mascara is smeared from tears.

”Dad,” Elijah says, keeping his voice even, looking over to the woman. “Xenia.” His face holds no emotion, no expression. “How may we help you?”

”How dare you,” his father hisses, his eyes running across all his children. “how could all of you do this to me and your mother?” The siblings answer all at once, sharing the same expression as Elijah.

”That’s not my mom.” Dezzi starts.

”Not my Mama.” Queen states. 

”That’s Harmony and Matthias’ mom, but not mine.” Aura clarifies. “Mine’s in West VA.”

“My mom is dead.” Elijah’s voice is the last to be heard in the chatter. “Xenia is your wife.”

”Don’t start that shit with me!” Their father spits. “She’s been raising all you kids for almost two decades, and this is how you repay her? How you thank me?” The siblings start up again. 

”She didn’t raise me.” Queen starts.

”I don’t remember her being much help.” Dezzi joins in.

”I know you were attentive to them sometimes.”  Aura adds.

”What are you talking about, dad?” Elijah deadpans, itching to slam the door in their faces.

”WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US ABOUT SOJO?” Xenia shrieks, pushing her husband out of the way.  “HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL US ABOUT HER? WE’RE HER PARENTS!” Fresh tears stream down her beautiful face.

”No, Dad is her parent, our mom is gone.” Elijah feels his demeanor slipping. “Remember, how I just said that?” His hand tightens on the edge of the door.

Theirndad flushes a hotter shade of red. “SHE’S MY DAUGHTER! AND YOU DIDN’T TELL ME! YOU HAD OTHERS KEEP THIS FROM ME! AFTER ALL I’VE DONE FOR ALL OF Y-"

”Shut up. ” Elijah snaps, looking up at his dad, “Just shut the fuck up , Charles, enough!” Elijah’s ears grow hot as anger builds in his chest. “You haven’t spoken to us since New Years’. You haven’t spoken to Sojo in years and the last time you two spoke, Queen got a scar and your children were taken away!”

Queen reaches up and touches the rough scar adorning the left of her jawline, remembering that day.

”And Xenia, you got some fuckin’ nerve even showing up.” Elijah spits, shooting a nasty glare at the crying woman. “Now that she’s dead, you suddenly want to be her mom? FUCK YOU!” Tears well up in the younger man’s eyes, immediately spilling over. “FUCK BOTH OF YOU!” He furiously wipes his eyes as his wife gently pulls him away from the front door. Queen steps in front, deep hatred in her stare.

"She stopped being your daughter the moment you chose her over us, Charles!” She hisses, sharply pointing to Xenia. “We all stopped being your kids. You didn't raise us and you two certainly didn't raise Matthias and Harmony, Sojo did!” 

“You want to know why you didn’t know?” Dezzi snarls. “IT'S BECAUSE NO ONE WANTED TO TELL YOU!” The couple takes a step back, their eyes are wide with shock. “WE DIDN’T WANT YOU AT HER FUNERAL, WE DIDN’T WANT YOU AT HER MILITARY MEMORIAL, WE. DO NOT. WANT YOU!” The last part of the rant is harshly screamed out, hurting her throat. Queen pulls her younger sister into her arms as she sobs.

”The last gift we could give her,” Elijah rasps, holding his wife to his chest. “Was peace from you.” Tears spill down his father’s face, his mouth hangs open in shock.

“E-Eli-” Charles starts when his son walks up, grabbing the door.

“Get the fuck off my porch.” Elijah cuts him off and slams the door, the shockwave disturbing the house. The four of them stand there in silence, each sibling taking in what just occurred the best way they can. Aura is the first to break the silence.

“I’m…I’m gonna go check on the kids.” She whispers. She gives her husband’s hand a firm squeeze before pulling away. Her footsteps barely register among the siblings as their breathing begins to slow.  ‘Please have the headphones on.’ Aura prays to herself as she climbs to the loft of the house.  She pauses as she approaches Matthias room, ensuring her face is as neutral as possible before opening the door. The sight before sends her heart into her stomach. ‘Shit.’ Matthias sits trembling on the floor with his arm wrapped protectively around Harmony. Music is heard blasting through her headphones, her head tucked into her brother’s shoulder, eyes closed. Matthias looks to his sister in-law as his vision blurs. Hot tears stream down the freshman’s face, he wished he had taken his baby sister's advice and worn his headphones.

He wasn’t ready to hear that.

Notes:

Sooooo... yeah, sorry the chapters have been a bit rough back-to-back. I promise more fun chapters will come soon!

Chapter 19: Happy Anniversary

Summary:

It's been one whole year since Sojourner arrived in Hell and what a year it's been. She and Gunny prepare for a repeat of the day they met, happy anniversary you two.

Notes:

Hey y'all, I'm going to be very busy at work, but I'll try to keep my update a week schedule. Please be patient with me if I slack a bit.

Date: August 16, 2019

Age: 1st Death Day

Location: Devil Dog’s Mechanics (Sojo hates the name)

Weather: Sweltering and stuffy with a heavy fog of dread

Current Conditions: Getting ready to go to do something reeeeaally stupid

SCRTC-tch-tch-tch Velcro is pulled tight, securing the brown tactical vest against Sojourner’s small frame. She gives the vest a sharp tug and her jerks body forward, Gunny looks over giving an approving nod. He cocks his pistol and secures it on his hip, finishing his final inventory check. He heaves a sigh then walks over to Sojourner.

”Flash-bangs?” He asks, looking her body gear over.

”Check.” The small bear confirms as she pats the cargo pockets of her green camouflage trousers.

”Blade?”

”Check.” She pulls the 6” blade from her hip. The metal scraping against its sheath gives off a bright Sheen . She gives it a turn over before flipping it and returning to its place on her black belt.

”Pistol?”

”Check.”

”Radio?”

Sojourner switches on her cranial’s headset, pulling the microphone to her lips Beep -beep “Test Check, test check, Mutt come in.” 

Gunny hears her voice over his comm set and replies, “Roger, roger Squid, test is good.” He hears her stifle a laugh, and he cracks a grin, reaching for her tool pouch. The face on the flap snarls at him and snaps its razor teeth at his gloved hand, barely missing it. Gunny frowns and glares daggers at the sentient pouch.

“I fuckin’ hate this thing,” he growls, eying the sentient little beast down. It hisses in response, challenging him.

”He’s just a little protective, leave it.” She says fondly, stroking the top of the pouch, it chuffs affectionately. “I had him for years when I was alive, and he even followed me down here, we’re literally and figuratively attached at the hip.” She bends to the side to look at it, “Hot Mic, be nice to Gunny, let him check.” The tool pouch grumbles, but obeys, allowing the Marine to check its immediate contents.

”Still can’t believe how much shit this thing can hold.” Gunny mutters, closing the flap roughly, it growls.

”Yeah, he’s my magic bag of holding!” Sojourner agrees happily, “Carries my tools, weapons, phone, snacks, this guy can do it all! And he gives me what I’m reaching for too, he’s so smart, aaawww.” She lovingly coos, leaning over to look at it, Hot Mic chuffs happily.

”Ugh,” Gunny rolls his eyes in disgust, “Alright, goggles on, can’t have your high beams giving away our position.” He pulls on his night vision goggles and flicks them on, neon green lights replacing his eyes. Sojourner goes to place her dark goggles on her face but stops, she takes a deep breath and exhales with a thoughtful look on her face.

”Chester,”Her voice is low as the air suddenly turns serious.

”Yeah?” Gunny answers as he lifts his eyebrow high, the sound of his own name throws him off. Sojourner fidgets with her vest’s shoulders and shuffles from one foot to the other, she considers her words before she speaks. She lifts her eyes to look directly into his and studies his features. 

“When… when we get back tonight, I want you to tell me more about yourself.” She finally says.  “We’ve been at each other’s side for a year and I want to know more about when you were alive.” Sojourner kicks at a stain on the ground. “I know you don’t do the emotional stuff, and it doesn’t have to be that way either, but shit man, I don’t really know that much about you. Your favorite color, your likes and dislikes; hell, I don’t even know your birthday.”

Gunny is caught off guard by her request and clears his throat and says nothing. Sojourner quickly begins to worry if she upset the Marine before he speaks, “I suppose we get to know each other a bit better.” He scratches his head, “Couldn’t hurt to know more ‘bout you if Imma be stuck with you for god knows how long.” Sojourner’s face lights up with delight and bounces on the tips of her black combat boots. He shakes his head and chuckles at her excitement, “October 13th.”.

Sojourner’s eyebrows furrow in confusion, “Huh?”

“My birthday,.” He explains, “It’s October 13th.” Sojourner pauses for a moment and then bursts into laughter. Surprised Gunny grunts, “The fuck’s so funny about that?” Sojourner struggles to answer as her laughter builds. Snort ! Gunny cracks a smile as a laugh threatens to spill out. ‘This little shit.’ “Well? C’mon, let me in on the joke.” He chuckles.

Sojourner finally catches her breath and sighs happily, “I think we went into the wrong branches, man.” Another snort slips out, “It’s like we were switched at recruitment.”

“The fuck are you talking abo-” BONG BONG BONG BONG! The city bell cuts Gunny off, signaling the one minute warning. Sojourner turns her head to the door, the door that saved her life and restarted it all over again. She feels tears sting in her eyes and her heart pounds in her chest as all her experiences of this past year crash into her all at once. Chester didn’t have to do anything to help her, he didn’t know her and shouldn’t have cared. He didn’t have to let her stay and start a new business and life with him.. He didn’t have to teach her mechanics and contractor skills, and he certainly didn’t have to spend over eight months to train her in field combat for this insane idea she had cooking in her head. 

This year has been incredible. She's always been skeptical that there is life after death, especially a life like the one she has now. Sojourner is truly grateful, but she still misses the life she had, and thinks about it deeply everyday; her career, her friends…her family. She would give anything to say how much she loved them one more time, and grapples with the fact that she will never get to see them ever again. She knows what she did to land herself in Hell and she doesn’t regret it for a second. Given the chance, she’d do the same thing all over again, knowing the outcome. ‘None of that matters now, I guess.’ Hanging her head, she takes a few steadying breaths before speaking.

”Chester, thank you again, for…for risking your afterlife to save mine.” She raises her face to meet his gaze, a tear falls as she smiles at him. 

Gunny feels his face heat up, thankful for his thick fur on his face. Ahem. He clears his throat loudly, “Glad my risk wasn't no waste, but considerin’ this is whole ‘Pay it forward’ plan of yours is just plain stupid, might be a waste after all.” 

“Yeah, it is really stupid, ‘specially since you agreed to it.” Sojourner gives a cheeky smile.

”Know what? Fuck you, Sojo.” Gunny says, feigning annoyance.

Snort. “Fuck you too, asshole.” Sojourner chuckles, their laughter fizzes out, the energy in the room now buzzing with confidence. “You ready, Devil Dog?”

”Fuck yeah Grizzly, let’s go save some sinners.” Gunny boasts, his tail wagging with excitement. 

The battle-buddies open the door to their home and turn off the light. As they step out into the alley where they first met, the sound of a bugle cuts through the sky. The extermination has begun.

Chapter 20: Setting Up Shop

Summary:

Our darling princess looks for suitable arrangement to house her passion project. She learns a bit more about her people as she does so.

Notes:

Hello everyone! I hope everyone is staying warm, safe, and healthy! I caught some cooties from my coworkers who didn't stay home from work, now I'm annoyed. Pleasant reading and thank you!

Date: November 8, 2019

Age: 201

Location: On the streets of Pentagram City

Weather: Miserable cold, like why does the wind hurt my inside bones?

Current conditions: Ain’t nothing gon’ break her stride, not even when the wind beats your face.

 

Fangs chatter rapidly as a harsh wind cuts through Charlie’s faux fur coat, yanking more heat from her tall frame. Her whole body shakes violently against her will as she brings her hands to her face to blow warm air into her mittens, crumpling the folder in her arms.

Sniff. “O-o-okay Charlie,” She wipes her runny nose against her sleeve, “Gotta find a p-place to set up shop.” Rounding a corner, Charlie yelps as nearly steps on a blue-skinned sinner posted up against a building wall. “Ooooooh my gosh, I am soooooo sorry sir! …Sir?” She kneels down and gently touches his shoulder, no response. 

Her yellow eyes widen with worry, “Sir!” Charlie grabs the sinner’s shoulder and shakes hard, “Wake up! Are you alri-” His head tilts and falls to the ground with a sickening thump and rolls a few inches away. The princess’s jaw drops in shock, staring at the ice quickly forming over the neck stump of exposed muscle. Letting go of the corpse’s shoulder, a scream gets stuck in her throat as she falls backward and frantically scoots back until she bumps against a pair of legs.

“Excuse me, madam are you going to finish that?” A light pleasant voice asks from behind Charlie. She tilts her head backwards to find a couple dressed in fine Victorian-era winter ware, standing with their arms linked. The lady hides her pretty face behind a chocolate brown fur hooded- shawl, a smile showing her ink-black eyes. The gentleman sports a jolly smile behind a robust mustache, he offers the demon royal a hand,and helps her up.

”F-finish?” Charlie asks as she slowly recovers from her shock, “I’m n-not finishing a-a-anything.” She shivers, confused by their inquiry. 

“Oh wonderful, so you don’t mind, then?” The lady’s shawl muffles her cheerful voice as another gust of cold wind blows. Charlie slowly shakes her head, her confusion grows as she tries to figure out what the couple is talking about.

”Splendid!” The pair celebrate in unison, their full smiles reveal razor sharp, pointed teeth as they step around the princess and approach the decapitated corpse. Hissing snarls ring out as the two descend on the body and begin to rip it to shreds with their teeth. A sharp gasp leaps out of Charlie’s mouth before she can stop it. 

”Holy shit, oh my god, WHY?!” Charlie immediately covers her mouth and twists her body away from the grotesque scene. “I-I mean, o-o-okay you two, GAG en-enjoy the r-r-rest of your afternoon!” She tries her best to regain her composure and fight her gag reflex. The wet sound of bones crunching in their mouths and organs are pulled from their place make her attempts near impossible. GAG!…aaaACK!! “If you’ll huuuuuuurk excuse me,” Charlie gives a wave and spins on her heels to jog away, her stomach does somersaults as she holds back another dry heave. After she gains a comfortable distance, she shudders once more before opening her folder to reveal a map of pentagram city and draws a huge “X” on the lower right portion of the star. 

“Ooookay, Cannibal Town, maybe not the best place to set up shop.” The wind picks up again and throws the folder into Charlie’s face and blinds her for a brief moment. She yelps and wildly scrambles for the folder, her mittens slide repeatedly on the smooth surface before the wind steals it away and sends its contents flying in separate directions. “Nononononono! Aaaaww shit!” Charlie swears as she chases after what little she can for a brief moment before giving up the moot task. Her outstretched arms drop heavily to her side, “Aw man, those were the available building listings! I used so much printer paper!!” A prickle of cold hits Charlie’s rosy cheeks, then another, she looks to the sky and sees snow beginning to fall.

Heaving a sigh, she begins her walk back to Razzle and Dazzle, the two little butlers waiting dutifully inside the warm limo as instructed. Charlie knocks on the window and the door unlocks, allowing the princess to climb in. “The weather’s getting bad guys, we’ll try again another time.” The luxury vehicle starts up and begins the drive back to the mansion. Dazzle flies up to her, with an inquisitive look, asking if she needs anything. Charlie smiles sadly and shakes her head, “No Dazzle, I don’t need anything, I’m alright, let’s just head home.” She gives the little demon a loving pat on the head and looks out the window, taking the vast outskirts of town as they continue the drive. 

Soon, the scene changes from towering buildings and cityscape to the posh suburbs of Uptown, when a large building sitting atop a steep hill comes into view. Charlie sits up and lets out a sharp gasp, “Wait, turn…turn right up here, please!” tapping excitedly on the divider. The driver complies and turns onto the poorly paved road that’s quickly being covered in snow. A few minutes later, the limo pulls up to the bottom of the hill and Charlie exits, her heart pounding wildly as she looks up towards the building. Its old exterior stands fast against the whipping winds, the tattered awning creaks miserably, but holds steady. Many windows have been smashed out and it is evident that not a soul, wayward or otherwise, has stepped foot in this decrepit building in ages. It’s abandoned, it’s gutted, it’s, 

“IT’S PERFECT!” Charlie screams, her heart lighting up with joy as she takes off running up the snowy hill, “IT’S ABSOLUTELY PERF- oof! ” The princess trips over a hidden root and faceplants into the powdery snow, a small cloud of white flurrying up around her. Her cheerful face pops up, leaving a perfect imprint of her wide smile in the snow, “IT’S AMAZING, AAAAAAHH” Charlie cheers, pushing herself up to all fours. Razzle and Dazzle fly to her sides, immediately inspecting her for any injuries when Charlie hooks them both into a tight hug, laughing. “A hotel! I’ll open a hotel! A HOTEL FOR SINNERS!! A REDEEMING HOTEL!!” The cheerful demon springs to her feet only for her ankle to crack loudly and give out, bringing her back down to one knee. “Oooooh my gosh, ah- ow, ow.” She reaches behind her to nurse her injury, her smile only growing bigger. “Okay! First, we tend to my sprained ankle, then open a hotel for sinners!” She declares triumphantly. 

The two little goat butlers help her to her foot and limp back to the limo, getting her settled in, they continue the trip back home. Charlie buzzes with excitement, “We’re gonna redeem sinners!” she kicks her feet in excitement when pain shoots up into her rapidly swelling ankle, krick. “Ooooow, sssssss aaaaaaa-ha…” She slowly lowers her leg back down. Razzle and Dazzle do their best to make Charlie comfortable as she begins to make plans. “This is gonna be fucking amazing, guys!” 

Well, it's gonna be somethin’.

Chapter 21: It's My Birthday

Summary:

Sojourner celebrates her birthday to make herself feel alive. Gunny wants to celebrate too and goes about it all wrong, but in the end the pair become closer

Notes:

Hey, how are y'all doing? I getting over being horrendously sick and slowly getting my voice back. A few trigger warnings in this chapter.
-Mentions of Sexual assualt
-Mentions of Date rape drugs
-Panic attacks
-Graphic violence

I will put ****** before the subject pops up for the sexual assault bit.

Otherwise enjoy!
P.S. the day the Marines was founded was November 10, 1775

Date : November 10, 2019

Age: would’ve been 32

Weather : Crispy, a bit nippy

Location: Kitchen

Current Conditions: Feelin’ festive, might bake a cake, idk.

Beep beep! The oven calls out to let Sojourner know it’s reached the desired temperature. She cracks the last egg into the bowl before taking the electric mixer and beating the yellow cake ingredients together. Grabbing two round cake pans, she fills each halfway, using a rubber spatula to scrape the mix either into the pans or her mouth. Sojourner places the cakes in the oven and sets a timer for 32 minutes then sets to work on the frosting.

——————

“It’s my birthday, happy birthday, it’s my birthday…” she sings quietly to herself, doing a little dance, “my birthdaaaay” Whipping up a small bowl of chocolate buttercream frosting, Sojourner continues dancing around the kitchen while eating the frosting off the whisk.  She hears the garage door close and heavy boots approach. “Yoooo, what up, dog?” She calls out as she tosses her whisk in the sink, “you done for the day?” Checking her watch, the cakes have two minutes left.

“Hey, the hell’s gotten into you?” Gunny chuckles as he places his tool box on the clean shelf behind the first workbench. Amused, he watches Sojourner bounce around the kitchen, clearing out the dishwasher. He’s secretly glad she nagged him to fix it. “You get into some crack or something?” Gunny asks, he shimmies off the top half of his dark olive-green  coveralls and untucks his light olive-green work shirt.

“I don’t eat crack, that’s just empty calories.” Sojourner sings-songs as she puts the last of the dishes away. “I’m just having a little sugar rush ‘cause of the cake and icing!”

Gunny sighs and shakes his head, “Ya don’t eat crack, ya smo- what cake?” He sniffs the air, it has a delicious sweet, buttery aroma. “Mmm, okay, what’s the cake for, Squid?” He sits down to take off his boots.

“Birthday cake!!” Sojourner nearly shouts, a big grin spreads across her face as she continues dancing. Gunny’s heart skips a beat. ‘She made a cake? For today?’ Thump thump thump. His tail begins to wag, 

“Well, aren’t you sweet?” The Marine smiles warmly, kicking off his boots, “Y’know you didn’t have to do that, I was gonna do a little something.” Sojourner pauses and turns to him, her eyes illuminate.

“Y-you were?” She says, the tenderness in Gunny’s voice shocking her, “I-I don’t know what to say.”

“Well, this is a very important birthday,” Gunny walks up to Sojourner and bends close to her eye level, “Needs to be celebrated properly, right?” He asks in a low voice.

‘Woah, he’s close.’ “I’m just a little surprised.” Sojourner looks down to fiddle with her nails, “didn’t expect you to remember….” She mutters, refusing to make eye contact. Gunny is confused.

“Why wouldn’t I remember? It’s my birthday.” Gunny asks, Sojourner looks up in surprise.

“We have the same birthday?” She asks confused, “I thought your birthday wa-”

“WOOOOAAAH, woah, woah! Just cause you passed a makeshift bootcamp, don’t make you a Marine! Today is our day!” Gunny snaps upright puffing his chest with indignation, “Sure, it was a little impressive how you handled yerself. And I’m man enough to admit that you did win that fight, but honey, you ain’t a- reaaaaalllyy is your actual birthday ain’t it?” Gunny finally registers what the little bear said. A beat of silence passes as his ears grow hot with embarrassment. Sojourner stares at him for a moment and then looks away, her expression is unreadable. 

Beep beep beep beep. The oven timer goes off, but neither of them move. The clock ticks away rhythmically, only adding to the awkwardness. Finally, Sojourner steps around Gunny to grab the oven mitts off the counter and retrieves the cakes out of the oven. She sets them on the stove and shuts off the oven. She tosses the mitts back on the counter and leans against the sink. Crossing her arms, Sojourner looks at her clawed, sock feet while Gunny stares straight ahead, his mouth presses into a straight line. 

Tick tick tick…

“Sojourner?”

“Yes, Chester?”

“Happy Birthday.”

“Thank you. Happy Birthday.”

“…Thank you."

The cake is delicious, the silence is awkward, and the Marine is deeply embarrassed.

____________

Two slices of yellow cake and chocolate frosting later.

”Hey,” Gunny gets Sojourner’s attention as he puts his plate in the sink.

”Hm?” She answers, licking her fork clean.

”Let’s go out,” Gunny suggests, pausing for a moment as he catches his words, “To celebrate!” He lets out a tight cough. 

“Where?” The sailor asks, thinking about how terrible the streets are, especially at night. “There’s not really a Chili’s down here.”

”Let’s go drink.” Gunny takes her empty plate and places it in the sink, “We can take a day off tomorrow to sleep off the hangover.” Sojourner shoots him an annoyed look.

”Gunny, I’ve told you a million times, I don’t drink.” She mutters, “I’ll go with you, but I’m not drinkin’.” Gunny tilts his head back with an exasperated groan, letting his heavy arms flop to his side.”

”You always say that!” The German Shepherd whines dramatically, “Let loose for one night!”

” You let loose enough for the both of us!” Sojourner retorts, “ Remember last month, how I fireman-carried you down twelve city blocks because you were so tanked? I’m good, dog!” She tries to exit the kitchen, but Gunny steps in the way, blocking her.

”Why not, can’t hold your liquor?” Gunny teases as he tries to get a rise out of her, “A sailor that can’t drink? That’s irony at its finest” Sojourner’s eyes narrow into a glare, she feels a tick of discomfort.

”I don’t want to get into it.” She deflects and tries to push past Gunny’s large frame, “I just can’t.” Gunny holds fast and refuses to move.

”Well what is it? Were you that chick ?” He chortles, mocking the anti-drinking campaign in the armed service. “The Navy didn’t know what to do with this drunken sailor?” He gently nudges her with his elbow and she slaps it away.

Sojourner’s frown gets deeper, “I said I’m not getting into it.” Her voice gets low and firm as she applies more pressure to try to push through. “ Move. ”

Gunny’s eyebrows raise in delight. “Oh shit, that’s it isn’t it? Are you a weepy drunk or a rager? You kinda strike me as both, but I could be wrong, maybe yer bit of a flirt.“ He wiggles his eyebrows at her. 

Sojourner eyes flare bright and she steps back away from him. Her body tenses up, ”I’M NOT LIKE THAT, YOU DICKHEAD!” She roars and a force hits him, hard. Gunny stumbles backward before nearly falling onto the coffee table in the lounge. She gasps loudly and throws her hands over her mouth as Gunny stares at her in shock. ‘W-what was that? I didn’t even touch him.’   “I…I didn’t mean to…”  She runs upstairs to her room and slams the door, leaving the Marine stunned. 

‘The fuck was that?’ Shaking his head, Gunny waits for a few minutes before going up to her bedroom. He walks up to her door and raises his knuckles to knock, but hesitates, he’s still shocked by her outburst and whatever knocked him backwards. ‘Did she do that?’ Pressing his ear to the door, he hears fast breathing and choked back sobs, he opens the door slowly. 

Huffhuffhuffhuffhuffhuffhuffhuff!

‘Shit.’

The sight before him breaks his heart, Sojourner is kneeling by her bed with her head tucked tightly into her arms, her fingers tap rhythmically as they count up and down from one to 10. Gunny’s ears drop as he recognizes the behavior immediately, ‘Panic attack.’ He approaches slowly and kneels down, immediately she draws in closer to herself. Frowning, he taps his nail against the frame of the bed, watching her reaction closely.

”Where are you right now?” He quietly asks as he continues tapping. Sojourner tries to answer, but another sob comes out. “ Breathe Sojo, where are you right now?” Two minutes pass before she’s able to speak.

”My room.” She finally whispers, her fingers continue to tap their pattern. Her worn voice is muffled by the mattress.

”What’s my name?” Gunny asks gently, still tapping the bed frame.

” huffhuff huff huff…huff Ches- Chester.” Sojourner’s breathing starts to slow. Gunny nods, relieved she’s calming down.

”Whatcha do today?” The tapping starts to slow, along with Sojourner’s counting.

”B-baked a ca-cake.” Sojourner's voice wavers as she lifts her head, her eyes are drawn with fresh tears streaming down her face. “A birthday cake.”

”Right, what flavor?” Gunny’s fingers stop as he sits against the bed frame.

Sojourner wipes her eyes, SNIFF! “Yellow cake with chocolate frosting.” Her voice is rough and tired as she rests her chin on her fist. “My favorite.” Gunny nods and says nothing, the two sit in silence.

”Ya good?” He finally asks. Sojourner sucks in a deep breath and lets it out in a long hiss.

”Yeah, I’m cool.” She says, wiping her eyes again. Neither of them move for a while, waiting for Sojourner to calm completely down. 

“Do you…wanna talk about it?” Gunny immediately gets anxious asking the question.

***********

Wiping her eyes, she begins to toy with one of her thick braids that frame her fuzzy face, weighing her decision. ‘Fuck it. Just rip the band-aid off.’ “My LPO drugged me and tried to rape me at a party.” She answers flatly, staring nowhere in particular.

’Goddamn, holy fuck, shiiiiit!’ Gunny does his best to keep his expression neutral, but he feels his lips pull tight. “Oh… fuck.”

Sojourner shrugs and continues, “It was his house party and I was new to the command, half the squadron was there. I was an underage E-3, not that it wouldn’t have mattered anyway since I’m allergic to alcohol, so I accepted a cup of Sprite from him.” Her expression gets distant as the memories return. “Didn’t notice the drug he put in it because y’know, fizzy drink and it never occurred to me that A: someone would drug a damn soda, and B: he was interested in me in the first place, I mean he was my boss for god’s sake! And C: No one would want me in that way ever.”

She undoes her braid and begins retwisting it. “Anyway, he brought me upstairs to ‘sleep it off’, I woke up with his hands in my shirt and pants, blah blah blah, brained him with something heavy and ran downstairs yelling.” Sojourner rushes over the worst part of the memory. Taking a deep breath, she powers through the rest of the story. “Anyway, I reported him and he got med sepped. As for me, damn near everyone turned on me, saying I got drunk and chickened out of sleeping with him.” She scoffs as her braid begins to fray. “He was a crowd favorite! ‘He would never do anything like that! You’re a liar!’ ” Sojourner's face darkens with bitterness as she remembers the backlash. “It wasn’t until I had red dog tags that proved my alcohol allergy that they finally shut up. But by then, the damage was already done.” Sojourner heaves a sigh and lays her head on her mattress. “So yeah, I don’t go out and drink, couldn’t even if I wanted to.”

***********

Gunny mulls over her story, rage building in his chest knowing that son of a bitch got away. ‘When that bastard gets down here…’ Suddenly, he perks up, “Y’know, sinners ain’t got allergies right?” He asks, hoping to change the tone of the conversation.

”…What?” Her eyes slide over to the Marine in surprise. “They don’t?”

“We’re dead, Squid.” Gunny explains, “I told ya this before, we ain’t got the problems we had when we were alive. Sure, we can get hungover and high n’ shit like that, but any problems you used to have, you ain’t gotta worry ‘bout that now.” He snorts as her mouth drops open in shock. 

“But… but,” She stammers, processing this information.

”I’m a damn German Sherpherd and I ate a cake with fuckin’ chocolate frosting, Squid.” He laughs, “If the rules of the living were to work down here, I would’ve been sick or dead right now.”

Sojourner thinks about what she just heard and lets out a sharp GASP!  “Holy shit!” She jumps up, alarming Gunny as she leaps over him and runs downstairs to the kitchen.  Gunny scrambles up to follow her, watching her snatch a spoon and climb up onto the counter to reach the higher cabinets.

”The fuck you doin’, gal?” Gunny asks, confused by her actions. Sojourner grabs his jar of peanut butter and unscrews the lid, mindlessly tossing it. She grabs a hearty scoop of PB out of the jar and stares at it, giving it her full concentration. “Sojo?” Gunny tries to get her attention again, she puts the spoon in her mouth and her eyes widen with wonder. Sweet, oaky flavor dances on her taste buds, the thick texture is delightful as she chews on. The nutty, musk scent fill her nose and adds to her first ever unhindered experience.

”it’s delichous,” She whispers, her mouth full and takes another bite, she does a little jig. “Mmmmm…” Her eyes slip close and she leans against the cabinet, a happy sigh escaping her. Gunny chuckles and walks over to her leaning against the adjacent counter. His tail begins wagging, watching her enjoy what he assumes is her first scoops of peanut butter ever.

“Is it what ya thought it’d be like?” he laughs as she eats another hearty spoonful. Sojourner moans in satisfaction and kicks her feet happily.

“I couldn’t even imagine what it could’ve tasted like because,” She swallows loudly, “the smell would always make me violently sick. I’ve had so many close calls, I’m surprised I wasn’t med-sepped for my food allergies alone.” Her statement reminds Gunny of what she said earlier, his eyes furrow with curiosity.

”Speaking of med sep, your dickhead LPO,” He asks, looking over to her. “What he get med-sepped for anyway?” Licking the remaining PB off the spoon, Sojourner looks at Gunny.

”Hmm? Oh, well apparently in my fear induced adrenaline, I broke his jaw and gouged his eye out.” The marine’s mouth drops open in shock. She nods and screws the lid back on, she leans back with a satisfied sigh. “That’s what got me moved to Japan, after I completed anger management.”

”Sojo, what the fu-” Gunny leans away from Sojourner.

“If the motherfucker had just kept his hands to himself, he might still have both eyes!” Sojourner snaps, slamming down the peanut butter jar beside her. “And not lose 20 pounds on an involuntary liquid diet.” Her arms cross tightly against her chest, “That goofy-eyed, gum smackin’, fucked jaw, son of a bitch…” She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, slowly releasing it. “But I digress, it’s in the past, I survived it.”

Gunny walks to the fridge and grabs a beer and hands a hard cider to Sojourner. He cracks his open and holds his drink up for a toast, “Here’s to surviving bullshit.” 

Sojourner stares at the alcohol in her hand for a moment before opening it and raising it. “Here’s to surviving as long as we did.” She cheers, Gunny snorts and clanks his beer to hers, they both take swig. Sojourner feels the sweet seltzer travel down her throat with a delightful burn trailing behind. ”It’s good.”

Notes:

That Guy is an anti-alcohol campaign in the military depicting embarrassing scenarios that resulted from excessive alcohol use. The pics are really gross and taken from real incidents.

Chapter 22: Mistle- Don't

Summary:

Sojourner is given a performance by some jackass, Gunny doesn't appreciate the gesture. In fact, Sojo has been getting a lot of attention he doesn't like lately.

Notes:

Happy Belated Valentine's Day my lovely readers, I hope your day was filled with a lot of love, romantic, platonic, self, etc.
I figured its high time y'all knew what Sojourner officially looks like! Behold

 

Sojourner Knight

Chapter 22 Mistle-Don’t

Date: December 22, 2019

Age: Dead at 30

Location: Some Jackass’s Thrift shop (That’s the name)

Weather: Frightful. The fire? Got a bit out of hand, but it's good now

Current Conditions: Wrapping up a fire repair job and speaking with the jackass owner

 

“Okay Mr. Jackie, the total amount for labor, repair, and materials is $632.87.” Sojourner says, tapping at her tablet screen. “I’ve emailed a copy of the paid invoice to you and you should be all set.” The bear looks up at the donkey-headed storekeeper and gives him a grin. “Alright, thanks for using… ugh, Devil Dog’s Mechanic and Repairs.” She grimaces as she says the company name, livid that she sucks at coin tosses. 

The store owner leans on the counter to rest his chin on his hand as he looks at Sojourner, taking in her curvy figure. “You know, I can’t thank you enough for fixing my store, and at such an affordable cost!” He says enthusiastically, “I’m gonna have to recommend your services to my customers! Do you have a way I can reach you?” He stares longingly at Sojourner’s face, grinning when she perks up.

”Oh! Yeah, yeah, we just received our cards actually, and I’m almost done setting up our Sinstagram!” Sojourner tucks her tablet into Hot Mic, and fishes out some glossy business cards. She hands a small stack to Jackie, who lightly brushes her fingers when he takes them. ‘Weird.’ “This has our email, shop hours, social media, and business number!”

”Mmmm, so if I need anything, I can call you?” Jackie asks suavely, putting on his best smolder. Sojourner isn’t paying attention as she checks her phone for her next appointment.

“If we have a spot available the day of, yeah.” Whoosh. A text message is sent to Gunny, letting him know she’s done and to come pick her up. “But if not, we’re pretty flexible and can normally get to it by the next business day.” 

“What if I need something right now?” Jackie straightens up and walks around the counter. He gives her a seductive look, waiting for her to respond, she glances up and cocks an eyebrow in deep confusion. 

“Wha…whatcha need?” She asks blankly, looking around the shop to see if there’s anything she missed. Jackie blinks, astonished that she hasn’t picked up any signals.

”I need…um…” Jackie loses some confidence as Sojourner frog blinks. “I need an audience!” He answers, crossing the room and grabbing an old guitar and plugging into an amp. 

“An audience?” Sojourner questions, watching the mule set up the instrument, “To test the merchandise?”

”Of course, I’m a businessman and I need to make sure only the best quality products are sold to my customers!” Jackie strongly strums the guitar and it screeches horribly, Sojourner throws her fingers in her ears and winces at the sound. He lets out an embarrassed cough, “See? But on top of running my own business, I happen to be an incredible musician.” He puffs out his hairy chest proudly, “Now sit back and enjoy the show, this number is just for you.” Jackie wiggles his heavy eyebrows at her.

He proceeds to make the most ungodly noises from the unfortunate instrument, all the while singing a horrifically off-key “I’ll Make Love to You”. Jackie thinks he is killing this performance and begins to strut towards Sojourner, continuing to sing. Sojourner however, is paralyzed by the atrocious music and stares in horror as Jackie tries to hold the microphone and play the guitar at the same time. ‘This truly is Hell.’

The song finally ends with Jackie doing a power slide on the filthy shop carpet stopping an awkward distance from Sojourner. He stands and walks over to her, smiling proudly. “Well, whatcha think?” Emphasis is put on the k of the last word. “Did that do anything for you?” He wiggles his eyebrows again. Sojourner stares at Jackie then stares out the window, carefully planning out her words.

‘Jesu Christo, superstar.’ ”I… fuck, okay. I think, goddamn…. Y-you should take some vocal lessons. Or…or music lessons…lessons in hearing things…Like ear training maybe?” Sojourner stares blankly ahead as her mind comes back from dissociating. “It…that was…”

“Shit. The word you’re lookin' for is shit.” Gunny stands in the doorway, glowering darkly at the donkey demon who is standing way too close to Sojourner for his liking. ‘Get away from her.’ He walks up to Jackie and looms over him, puffing his chest out, forcing the suddenly meek shop owner to slowly back away. “Did ya pay your bill?” Gunny asks sternly. Sojourner’s eyebrows furrow in concern, what is he so upset about?

”Y-yes sir.” Jackie stammers, he backs into the counter, making himself jump.

”Was everything to yer satisfaction?” Gunny corners him in, glaring down at him.

”Everything is per-perfect!” Jackie’s voice cracks with fear, his long ears drooped down behind his head.

”Do ya need anything else?” Gunny growls, baring his teeth. Jackie yelps, HEE-HAW!

”Gunny!” Sojourner grabs his arm and pulls him back, “The fuck is with you?” Gunny rumbles angrily. Snap, snap! “Yo!” She snaps her fingers in front of his face, getting his attention, “What’s the matter?” Gunny looks down at her and his face softens seeing her concern. He cuts his eyes to Jackie one more time before turning away.

”Nothin’, long day.” He grumbles, letting her lead him out of the shop. She pushes the door open and they’re hit with a cold wind.

“Okay, but that doesn’t mean you square up with the customer, c’mon now!” Sojourner chastises. The pair leave the shop together, when Sojourner pokes her head back in, “Sorry ‘bout that Mr. Jackie!” The door closes. It opens once more, “Practice music a lot more before ever doing that again, okay bye!” The door closes. Jackie is thankful most of his wardrobe today is black, no one will see the pee stain.

Gunny and Sojourner climb in the van, she takes off Hot Mic and tucks him safely in the back before turning to her business partner. “Gunny, what’s wrong? That’s the fourth customer this month you’ve cornered.” Gunny pulls on his seatbelt and says nothing, putting the keys in the ignition, Sojourner snatches them and holds them away. “Chester,” She says sternly, “fuckin’ talk to me.” He glares at her and swipes at the keys, Sojourner dodges and drops them in the front of her coveralls and glares back. The Marine’s face flares hot with embarrassment as he watches the keys disappear, he stares at the sailor sputtering.

”I…you…That’s cheatin'!” Gunny finally stumbles out his words. “Give me them damn keys!”

”If you want ‘em back, you betta talk to me!” Sojourner snarls, “I’ve been patient with you, I put up with a lot of your bullshit and you put up with mine, but this shit is affecting our business! So,” She crosses her arms and leans back, “ Da fuck is yo’ malfunction?”

Gunny stares at Sojourner and then to the location of the van keys, shaking his head, he finally gathers his thoughts, “He was flirtin' with ya.” He grumbles, feeling his skin get hot with jealousy. “Son'bitch was all over you.” His pointed ears lie flat on his head in anger as he grips the wheel hard. “He was in yer space, leerin' at you and-”

”You were protecting me.” Sojourner interrupts, Gunny turns to her and his heart clenches. Her eyebrows furrow upwards and her mouth pulls into a deep frown. Remembering the LPO incident she shared with him on her birthday, she sits guiltily with her hands in her lap as she looks down. “I’m sorry Gunny,” She says quietly, “ I didn't pick up on that at all.”

Squeezing his eyes shut, Gunny wants to slam his head on the steering wheel, ‘Chess, you piece o’ shit. She thinks you were lookin' out for her.’ “Don’t…don’t apologize for that.” He grits out, “S’not yer fault you can’t pick up on that kind of stuff.”

Sojourner’s hands twist themselves, “But I should know! I just don't know why I don’t. I dunno if it’s a me thing, or an ace thing…”

”Ace?” Gunny asks inquisitively, “Like cards or somethin’” Sojourner lets out a small laugh.

”Nah man, asexual. It means I experience little to no sexual attraction at all.” Sojourner explains, playing with a red wire in her hair. “I mean, I’m not entirely ace. I’m demisexual, that means I only experience sexual attraction once I’ve deeply bonded with someone emotionally.” She mumbles embarrassingly, still looking at her lap, “But usually, when I tell people, it’s always ‘oh you’re just picky, or that’s what everyone does,’ so I just say I’m ace.” She drops her hands into her lap, “I’ve never been good at noticing when people flirt with me, usually because I don’t think people want to flirt with me, but I’ll do better at paying attention okay?” 

Sojourner turns to her friend and sees how upset he still looks. Gently, she holds his forearm, “Gunny, I promise I’ll keep my head on a swivel so you don’t have to worry as much,” She retrieves the keys and hands them to him, “I’m sorry again for getting at you.” 

He holds them in his hand as he processes her words. ‘She’s…not attracted to anyone?’ Turning on the van, they drive off. It’s a really quiet ride, Sojourner turns on Gunny’s favorite rock station on the radio then looks out the window. The music does a decent job of covering up the sound of his heart breaking. 

Notes:

Damn it, Gunny that's the only thing you took away from your heart-to-heart? Typical.

Chapter 23: Sharpen the Spear

Summary:

A new challenger approaches, meet the newest character of the story!

Notes:

Hey y'all, sorry I missed my schedule, I went to Fan Expo in Vancouver and met some of the Helluva Cast as well as Amir Talai and Blake Roman!! Each person sweeter than the last! My meeting with Blake Roman will now be a part of the story later down the line!

Date: February 20, 2020

Age: Ancient

Location : Paradise, holy warrior training grounds

Weather: Perfect just like yesterday and the day before since forever

Current Conditions: Post training mantras courtesy of Big Brother Azrael

 

Huff, huff, huff…

“Sound off, what is your purpose?” A low, smoky voice orders, the sound of heavy boots thump rhythmically on the white stone floor. Thump, thump, thump…

“To be the sword of our Heavenly Father, to strike down any threat to our home and the souls that are left in our charge.” A slight wheeze cuts through the rich, tired voice. 

“Whom do you obey?” Azrael asks, continuing his slow circles around his smaller brother. His ink black hair is slicked back against his head, the tips barely touch the hem of his black mock turtleneck, his alabaster skin glows in contrast to his dark attire. The turtleneck stretches across his broad chest and tucks into dark gray cargo pants, bloused around heavy black boots. 

”Our Heavenly Father, and all who have been ordained from on high to relay His blessed word. Azrael, Gabriel, Raphael, Sera.” A cough is fought back as the heavy breathing is brought under control.

”Whom do you trust?” Azrael continues, thump thump thump , his steel-toed boots set a rhythmic pace on the marble floor.  

”Azrael, Gabriel, Raphael, Sera, those who are ordained and carry out our Heavenly Father’s commands.” A drop of sweat drips onto the floor, tp .

”Does your existence belong to you?” Azrael's voice carries a menacing tone.

”No sir.” 

”Are decisions yours to make?” The Angel of Death presses.

”No sir.”

”What happens if you stray?” Azrael’s voice lowers to a threat as he speaks directly into the listening ear.

“I will be struck down and damned for all eternity. The same fate as the original sinner, Lucifer Morningstar.” Another wheeze, but it’s tighter than the last. The thumping stops. 

“Very well, you are dismissed.” Azrael laces his marbled hands behind his back. “Tidy yourself and resume your heavenly duties.”

”Yes sir.” The tension still present in the breathing, footsteps turn to walk towards the exit. 

“And Michael?” Azrael calls, not moving from his position. There’s a slight squeak against the polished floor as footsteps abruptly stop.

”Yes, Azrael?” Michael asks, frozen in place awaiting the next order, his body automatically snaps to attention. His jaw clenches tight with anxiety. 

”Don’t think I didn’t notice that change in your voice when you said… his name.” The air in the room suddenly feels suffocating. “We will address that next time. Samael is no more, only Lucifer remains and he is not our beloved brother!” Azrael’s voice grows harsh, but remains quiet, deadly. 

“…Yes sir.” Michael answers, keeping his voice steady. The warrior angel hears his brother’s footsteps approaching behind him. Michael’s body goes rigid out of reflex, knowing what could happen next. He keeps his eyes fixated ahead as Azrael approaches his side and leans in close. Michael suppresses a flinch.

“Your twin, Samael is dead,” ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-THUMP “Lucifer rose instead in unholy form and unleashed evil unto the world.” BA-THUMP BA-THUMPBA-THUMP Michael’s heart begins to beat harder. “And from On High, you Michael, were chosen to strike down the Harbinger of All Evil!” BA-THUMPBA-THUMPBA-THUMPBA-THUMP “It had to be you, to show Heaven and Earth how easily love can be twisted to corrupt even the holiest of creations when left unchecked.” Azrael leans down to Michael’s eye level, looking for any sign of weakness, but he remains a statue.

“Y- ahem Yessir.” Michael answers, his heart pounding in his ears.

“Who loves you Michael?” Azrael coldly looks at Michael’s lightless eyes, when he receives no answer, “ Who. Loves. You?” He hisses, he watches as Michael’s breath hitches.

“No one.” Michael finally whispers, a trail of sweat seeps into one of his golden eyes, making it sting.

“Good. Now you may go.” Azreal steps away to give his brother space. Michael simply nods and exits the training room.

‘He shall not befall the same fate as him.’ Azreal’s chest clenches tightly.

‘He shall not.’

Chapter 24: Owed Nothing

Summary:

Since their heart-to-heart outside of Some Jackass's Thrift shop, Gunny hasn't been dealing with Sojo's preferences very well. In fact, he has been dealing it like an asshole. Here's the fever pitch of it all.

Notes:

What's good, y'all? This week has been heinous and it's only Tuesday! Work will take me away from my home for a little bit then I'm visiting a friend overseas! But I should be able to keep posting. I'll let y'all if anything changes.

TW: Mentions of abusive relationships, rape, and street violence.

Date: June 1, 2020

Age: Dead for almost 13 years

Location: A paint shop that isn’t damaged, yet

Weather: It’s thinking about raining

Current Conditions: Months of tension coming to fever pitch

 

“No.” Sojourner states flatly as she stuffs her phone into the back pocket of her jeans. “Nope, nu-uh, neeeewwp.” Her expression does not match the attitude of her pink I’m a Hugger cactus graphic tee. 

“The fuck you mean ‘newp’?” Gunny asks, his ears lie flat against his head, “Look at it! Toner did great” He gestures to the newly painted van. It’s painted Marine Corps green with a bulldog on the hood, sporting a type III camouflage uniform with its cover concealing part of its red face. It is baring its teeth and holding a screwdriver reversed gripped in its overly veiny, muscled hand.

“I- I can’t even…it’s so… no! Naw, HELL NAW!!” Sojourner stammers in disbelief at the hideous, new-age style mascot on the hood. “You didn’t…you didn’t even ask me if…. WHAT IN THE UNHOLY FUCK!?” She roars, a low rumble underlying her words.

Circling the van, Sojourner comes across the body of the vehicle and stops dead in her tracks, taken aback by the words DEVIL DOG’S MECHANICS AND ELECTRIC REPAIR .

“I came up with the design myself!” Toner, a sinner with a blue flaming skull for a head and donning blue paint-splattered overalls declares, walks up and throws his arm over Gunny’s shoulder. “Yeah, the guys all think it’s pretty badass.” He sniffs casually, clearly proud of himself. Sojourner stares at the sinner and returns her gaze back to the German Shepherd

“Gunny, a word please?” Sojourner asks with too much politeness, venom dripping off every word, her jaw is tight with anger. The Marine frowns, not liking the tone of her request.

“What the fuck is yer problem? It’s a good design and he even did the name for free!” Gunny argues back, his annoyance at her reaction growing.

“I’d like to speak to you, privately please.” Sojourner continues through gritted teeth, her patience clearly gone.

“No.” He barks and crosses his arm in front of his broad chest, “Look I don’t know what female issue yer having right now, but-“ Sojourner’s eyes glow bright and her mouth drops open. 

“CHESTER OSCAR PULTZER, YOU GET YOUR FURRY ASS OVER HERE NOW !” A small shockwave emits from Sojourner, repelling all small metal objects in her vicinity and sending them flying into the drywall of the paint garage.

Grrr, grrr, grrr! Sojourner’s chest heaves, her glowing eyes never look away from her business partner as she seethes. Gunny and Toner are stunned, both their mouths are slightly agape. “S-Sojo, what the fuck?” Gunny whispers, he has a strange expression Sojourner has never seen on his face before. The paint shop owner hides behind Gunny’s massive frame as his coworkers come out to see the commotion.

“Female problem. Female problem?! ” She roars, “We talked about and agreed on what we were gonna to do with our van! We agreed on the name change! Painting the van was my idea, fixing the van was my idea, I WAS THE ONE WHO FOUND. THE FUCKING. VAN!!” Sojourner rages, the van creaks and rocks as if someone is pushing it. 

“He-hey okay, easy,” Gunny gently says, putting his hands up defensively, eying how the van moved. Metal tools hanging up on the wall begin to rattle. “Yer right, we-” RUMBLE! A wall of paint cans shakes violently. “Woooooaaah, woah, woah gal!” Gunny flinches as the van rocks again, “I fucked up! I’ll get it repainted!” The men back up slowly, fear blatant on their faces.

“Repainted? WHY WASN’T IT PAINTED RIGHT THE FIRST TIME?! WITH THE DESIGN YOU SAID YOU LIKED?!” Lights begin to flicker as another shockwave emits from Sojourner’s small body.

Toner peeks out from behind Gunny, “Mámi, it’s our fault, we’re the ones who encouraged him to ke-” BZZZZT POP!  An overhead light bursts, sparks rain down from the damage. A few men yelp in response.

“YOU LISTENED TO HIM?! HIM, AND NOT YOUR BUSINESS PARTNER, YOUR FRIEND?” Sojourner bellows, her eyes glow bright. “You met him two. FUCKIN. WEEKS AGO!! ” The van gets knocked back again, precariously balancing on two wheels before slamming down heavily. “I’VE KNOWN YOU FOR YEARS!” The sound of the van landing finally snaps her out of her rage.

Huff huff huff

Sojourner finally breaks eye contact with Gunny and looks around confused. Tools are embedded in the wall and damaged lights flicker. She stands in the middle of clear space despite the clutter everywhere else. She looks at the men, they’re all huddled together, using Gunny as a barrier.  Clenching her jaw in frustration, Sojourner closes her eyes and takes a deep breath.

“First, you start being an asshole out of nowhere! Then you consistently fuck up jobs and piss off customers. Next, you just stop… working jobs with me altogether. And then there’s your excessive drinking, bringing a different woman into our living space, weekly, who steal my clothes…now you pull this shit.” Sojourner gestures to the van, “The two of us made a design that includes the both of us. Navy and Marine Corps, you saw me work so. Hard. On the design. You told me you loved it, I was proud of it.” Her voice cracks as she drops her arm in defeat, “Enjoy your van, Sir.” Sojourner performs an about face and leaves. 

Silence. bxzt-b-bbzzzzzxt. The remaining lights fight to stay on. Some papers fall to the floor and smoothly splay out with a soft flutter. Toner steps around Gunny to face him, “Oye, big dog, you okay? That was crazy, didn’t know your lady could flip like that!”

“My old lady threw plates at my head.” An steer sinner says from the inner garage door.

“My wife stabbed me.” Another painter chimes in. “Not that I blame her, I did fuck her mom.”

The men begin sharing all the ways the women in their lives have shown anger when Toner speaks up, “AY, cállate un segundo! Chess, you good? Talk to me, you two gonna be okay?” The skull’s hollow eyes hold deep concern for his friend as he looks at Gunny’s drawn face.

“I need a drink.” Gunny grumbles.

________________________

Hole in the Wall Bar 2256

 

The two men sit at a random bar working on two mugs of beer. Toner takes a swig, while Gunny hunches over his own, watching the bubbles rise to the surface.

“¿Qué pasó, perro?” Toner asks, popping some pretzels into his mouth. A melancholy country tune drones on in the background, “At first, I thought the Mrs. was trippin’ but after she started firin’ off…”

“Ain’t my Mrs.” Gunny interrupts, still staring at his untouched beer.

“Fiancé?” Toner guesses between chews.

“No.”

“Girlfriend?” Toner tosses more pretzels in his mouth, “She said you two live together.”

“She’s a…coworker.” Gunny struggles on the last word, he swirls his mug, spilling some foam.

“A coworker.” Toner’s expression falls to a half-lidded stare, “A coworker’s got you this twisted up? C’mon man, do I look stupid to you? You really gonna tell me that’s all she is to you? What kind of ‘coworker’ A: lives with you, B: puts up with that much of your bullshit, and C: lets you fuck up her feelings to a point she turns into fuckin’ Magneto? You are so fulla shit!” The blue flames on Toner’s skull glow hot with irritation. “What happened, she dump you or something and you two can’t get out of the lease?”

“No, she ain’t dump me!” Gunny snaps, a low growl in his voice.

“You dumped her and you have regrets?”

“We ain’t never been like that!” Gunny slams his fist down on the counter, their mugs rattle from the impact. “We ain’t never gon’ be like that, neither!” Gunny’s southern accent thickens, his eyes stare straight ahead at nothing in particular. “We just… have a business together is all.” He mumbles quietly, leaning his arms on the counter.

“Aaaaah, she rejected you and you have a sore dick about it.” Toner concludes, finishing off his beer, he signals the bartender for another one.

“She ain’t rejected nothing!” Gunny growls defensively, “I ain’t told her nothin’!”

“Ladies can sense when corn-dogs like you are about to bring them bullshit they don’t wanna deal with, so they beat you to the punch.” Toner tips the barkeeps and downs a gulp. “Saves you the humiliation of baring your soul for nada.”

”That gal is denser than shit mixed with cement!” Gunny declares indignantly, “My lord, the amount of times fellers have tried flirtin’ with her and it goes clear over that short head of hers. She’s shocked every time I point it out to her too, and believe me, can’t no one fake that many blank stares.” Gunny finally picks his beer and downs it in one go. He wipes his mouth and nods to the bartender, already dropping off another beer. “Smart as a whip, can tell what needs fixin’ just by fuckin’ listenin’, fights like a grown-ass man, memory’s sharp, tongue’s even sharper and-”

“La amas.” Toner interjects, resting the side of his head on his fist.  An impish grin sits on his skeleton face.

“Say what now?” Gunny asks, raising an eyebrow. “English brother, I ain't go no foreign language smarts.”

“You love her.” Toner explains, catching a pretzel in his mouth, “And you’re too chicken shit to tell her.” Gunny opens his mouth to protest then closes it, he turns back to his drink, picking it up.

“Won’t do no good, anyhow.” Gunny says, his pointed ears fall to the sides of his head. “She told me she won’t be with no one.”

“Why not?” Toner asks, confused by the Marine’s surrender.

“She don’t like boys, or girls, or nothin’.” Gunny explains, he takes a deep gulp of beer. “She don’t feel nothin’ for anyone, part of a card deck or somethin’.”

“She’s ace?” Toner clarifies, “Like asexual?”

“Yeah, that thing.” Gunny confirms sadly,“Told me after the umptheenth time I pointed out some jackass was talkin' her up.” Toner’s hollow eyes narrow into a scowl as he sits up straight. The painter frowns.

“So wait, lemme gets this right, she tells you her sexuality in a casual conversation and you realizing you can’t fuck her, decide throw a tantrum and make her life fuckin’ miserable instead?” Toner’s face grows angry as his blue flames burn red. “Are you a fuckin’ child?”

“That’s not what I’m fuckin’ doin’!” Gunny bares his teeth, his hackles rising, "Who's fuckin' side are you on?!" Toner gets in Gunny's face, his voice getting louder.

“She can’t figure out why her friend is treating her like shit and you’re fuckin' around making her pay for not wanting to sleep with you or anyone? YOU’RE CHICKEN SHIT, PERRO!” Toner’s flames flare up, forcing Gunny to back up from the heat.

“Whoa, Tones, you gotta calm-” Gunny stands up, shielding his face from the heat as other patrons back away from them.

“You got a good woman and you’re fucking her up on purpose!” Toner stands from his seat, his flames nearly touching the ceiling, “That girl don’t owe you nothin’!” Searing, hot flames engulf his entire body.

BRRRRRRRRRIIINNNGGGG! The fire alarm activates and the sprinkler system goes off, raining stagnant water over the bar and its patrons.

___________________________

30 minutes later. On the darks streets of Pentagram City

 

The two soaked men walk in silence, looking at everything but each other.

“Who was it?” Gunny asks, shoving his hands in his pockets. Toner looks at him confused, “When you started burnin’ up, who were ya thinkin’ bout?” The Marine clarifies. The artist sighs and pulls out a cigarette, lighting the end against his head, he takes a long drag before answering.

“My mama.” The painter finally answers sadly, “When Papa died, she was pursued by all the men in my town. But she always said no, she had Papa’s love and didn’t want anyone else’s. But those pendejos didn’t like that she didn’t want them…” Toner takes another long drag and finishes off his cigarette, flicking it away. “They raped her when she was coming home from work one day.” Gunny’s heart drops into his stomach, “Mama worked herself to death to get me and mis hermanos out of that neighborhood, and my dumbass gets jumped graffitiing her church.” Toner scoffs, pulling out another cigarette. Snp. The cigarette breaks, Toner curses under his breath, angrily throwing it to the ground and crushing the now empty box in his hand. Gunny lets out a small whine.

”I…I’d never do that to her, y’know.” Gunny quietly says, shame clear on his face.

”No, I don’t know that,” Toner snaps, “We haven’t known each other long and based on what Mámi brought up and with what I know now, I don’t fuck with you either! I don’t fuck with anyone who treats a woman or anyone like that!” Toner stops and turns to Gunny, leaning in and locking eyes with him. “So get your shit together and unfuck yourself.” He jabs a finger in Gunny’s muscled chest, “I will be checkin’ in on Mámi, and if I don’t like what I’m seeing, I will personally take you out myself, pendejo! Buenas noches!” Toner turns and stomps away, cursing in Spanish.

Gunny watches the painter walk away and then looks down to kick a pebble on the ground. ‘Shit. I really fucked this up.’ Hearing thunder rumble overhead, he looks up before jogging down the street towards home. He has a lot of work to do.

_______________

Tone-Death Paintshop, 2344

Toner locks the door to his shop just as the downpour begins. Tossing his keys on the side table, he notices a woven basket of fruit and chocolate-chip cookies with a note tied to the handle. Grabbing a cookie, he takes a bite and reads:

Dear Tone-Death Paint Shop,

I would like to explictly apologize for my behavior this afternoon, none of you deserved to be subjected to my personal problems. The artistry on the van is phenomenal and I’m sorry I didn’t appreciate the hard work you all did. Please accept this basket as a token of my apology, and if you are comfortable, I would like to repair your garage for free, since it's my fault it was damaged. Please let me know if this works, if not, I can send funds to have the damages covered.

Again, I deeply apologize, and thank you for being friends with Chester, he needs you.

Warmest Regards,

Sojourner Knight

The painter shakes head in disbelief as he finishes his cookie, it’s delicious. “What the hell are you doin’ down here, Mámi?”

Notes:

We have a new character! Toner Creadora died at the age of 25 in 2015 when he and his crew were jumped while tagging his mother's old church. His cause of death was being lit on fire with a can of spray paint and a lighter. His assailant was never found. Very protective of women and does a lot of self since arriving in Hell. He keeps his paint shop up and running with the crew he has under contract. He is very strict about respect but is a pretty easy guy to work with.

Chapter 25: A Dog’s Purpose

Summary:

Is Heaven truly paradise for all its residents? Especially for the one designated to keep everyone safe?
TW: Family violence/ disturbance, panic attacks.

This chapter was inspired by @Reminaoo on X. Please check out her page, her art is amazing.

Notes:

Whelp, I’m sick once again. The area I’m stationed at for work right now is a desert and therefore extremely dusty and its murder on a recovering upper respiratory infection patient. Do a chant or something for me, a bitch is miserable.

DATE: August 16, 2020

Age: Ancient

Location: The Portal from Heaven to Hell

Weather: In Heaven beautiful, in Hell, well you know what day it is…

Current Conditions: Donning Heavenly Armor wondering how the fuck he got himself into this…

______________________

Present Day- Four Minutes before Extermination Commences

 

Michael straps his golden sword to his hip, its weight is all too familiar and unwelcome. He ties his shoulder length blond hair into a mid-ponytail before pulling on his blue and white tunic, it still fits. ‘Of course it still fits, why wouldn’t it?’ He thinks bitterly to himself. Reaching down, he adjusts his pant legs so that they cover the top of his heavy black boots, the metal spikes on the bottom feel strange, he doesn’t like it. 

Knock, knock.

“Enter.” Michael monotones, knowing full well who’s behind the door. He finishes putting on the rest of his armor.

“Hey BullDog, you ready?” Adam asks, slurping the last of his energy drink before crushing it against his head, “This is gonna be FUCKIN’ EPPPIIIIICCC!” Michael winces at the loud volume, “Come on, countdown is in two minutes.” 

Michael heaves a sigh and takes one last look in the mirror, a miserable look sits on his beautiful face, his golden-hue cheeks look dull as deep, dark circles sit under his eyes.

“Jeez-Louise guy, when’s the last time you slept, like for realsies?” Adam asks, genuine concern showing through his mask. Michael doesn’t answer. Adam frowns, “Well, can’t take a nap now, but maybe this’ll cheer ya up, here.” He holds out a gift box to Michael, who accepts and opens it. A black mask with glowing blue eyes and a deranged smile looks back at him, rosy red circles sit on the cheeks of the face. 

“Ya like it? I designed it myself!” Adam says hopefully, watching Michael’s reaction as he studies it. “And, it moves like mine and my girls’.” He points excitedly at his own mask, a wide smile spread across it. “So, whaddaya think?”

Michael gives a small smile, appreciating the gesture of the gift, “This is… really great, Adam, thank you.” He places the mask on his face and it leaps to life. 

“Fuck yeah, you look totally badass, dude!” Adam cheers, throwing up rocker hands, "Come on, let's rile up the troops!” Adam hooks an arm around Michael’s shoulder and leads him out the door. 

‘How did it come to this?’

 

——————

 

August 08, 2020 16:40

 

“Michael, you’re still here?” Raphael asks, leaning over his younger brother’s desk. “You’ve been at this for…what is now, days? Take a rest, go have fun!” He suggests cheerfully. 

“I’m fine, Raphael.” Michael retorts as he places a complete blue folder on the ‘Outgoing’ basket on his clean desk, it instantly disappears. “Besides, I’m done with my training for the week and there’s nothing going on that needs my attention at the moment.” The warrior doesn’t look up as he reaches for a bulky red folder on the ‘Incoming’ basket and opens it up. “So, unless you need something,” He rolls his shoulders before adjusting the rolled up sleeves of his light blue hex-pattern button-up. The bright gold tie around his neck is tucked into a dark navy blue vest with matching slacks ending with a shined pair of black Derby shoes. 

“Actually, I do!” The healer excitedly interrupts, “I… uuuh, need yoooou to fix something!” Raphael smiles brightly as Michael looks up at him, unamused.

”…Fix something?” Michael confirms, not believing for a moment Raphael needs anything. “Okay, I’ll bite,” He leans back in his office chair and laces his fingers across his belly. “What is this something that only I can fix?”

”…The fence?” Raphael suggests, sweat begins to bud on his gold tan skin as he fidgets with the hem of his lime green unicorn scrubs.

”The fence?” Michael repeats, lifting a skeptical brow, “What fence, Raphael?” He watches his older brother twirl his honey brown locks nervously around his finger.

”Yes, the fence at, uh, at theeee…” Raphael searches for an answer, his green eyes search the room for an answer when they land on a spot of light near the window. ‘Rainbow.’ *gasp!*  He gets the most perfect idea, “The fence at the Rainbow Bridge!”

”The Rainbow bridge?” Michael perks up at the mention of his favorite place in Heaven, “Really?” His eyes sparkle at the healing angel. Got him. Now to bring it home.

“Yeah, the infamous Colonel Knobbles tore up part of the fence again. He got into the cat section of the sanctuary and startled the poor things, what a naughty goat.” Raphael tsks, “So now, everyone is busy literally herding cats, and the goats are free, it’s a whole fiasco really.” Raphael waves his hand dismissively as if batting away the made up chaos. Michael, however, is hanging on his every word, “But what am I even saying? Of course you’re too busy to mess with animals, I suppose I’ll go get-” Raphael teases as prepares to walk out of the office.

*Scccrrrt!* The chair and desk scoot back hastily as Michael scrambles up. “NO! I can do it, I’ll go check it out!” Michael catches his break in character and his face flushes gold with embarrassment. He clears his throat, *ahem* “I-I mean, I’m already ahead of schedule on paperwork, and I’m at a good stopping point for the day anyway, so, I don’t mind helping.” Michael does his best to find the most interesting part of the ceiling as he tucks his hands behind his back. “More cardio, you know.”

’Oh my Dad, he is too adorable’ Raphael struggles to stifle a laugh at Michael’s shifts in attitude.

The brothers walk in tandem out the High Angelic Courthouse and fly high over the beautiful city below. Winners fly and walk about the clean streets of Heaven, enjoying their everlasting paradise. Beyond the rolling hills of clouds, a large rainbow leads to an incredible field of green that stretches on forever, the Rainbow Bridge. Home to the spirits of wild animals and beloved pets that eagerly wait for their humans to join them in eternity. 

Michael smiles warmly, animals have always been his favorite type of spirits: pure, honest, gives love and accepts it without any compromise or conditions. To him, animals share the same innocence as children. The two brothers enjoy the afternoon playing with the animals, the fictional fence mending quickly forgotten. Nearing dusk, Michael receives a text from Azrael asking where he is and lets out a long sigh. He bids Raphael goodbye and makes his way back to the H.A.C. He smiles politely at the Winners who greet him, walking militantly down the main strip while deep in his thoughts when a large figure steps in front of him. 

*SLUUUUUURRPPP* The obnoxious slurping from a near empty cup interrupts his thought. Michael stops mid-stride and looks up.

”Adam.” Michael says flatly, “Can I help you with something?”

”Nah, man, I’m good, jus’ wonderin’ what Heaven's Bulldog is doin’ among the humble folk?” Adam teases, speaking with the straw between the sharp, yellow teeth of his mask. Michael tenses, he hates that nickname. Adam notices and holds up a hand in defense, “Heeeey, lighten up will ya? Look at the bags under your eyes, man. When was the last time you had a day off?”

”I don’t need a day off, Adam.” Michaels states, spreading his six wings, preparing to take off, “I’m fine.” Raphael’s voice nagging in the back of his head cause Michael’s pleasant mood to fade. “If you don’t need anything from me, goodbye.” Michael takes to the skies, glad to be done with conversation. Adam watches the archangel fly off, smirking as he chews on his straw ‘That guy needs to blow off a lot of steam and get laid, big time’. An idea pops into his head, pulling out his phone, Adam scrolls through his contacts and presses a contact, *brrrr-brrrr*

“What?” A raspy voice answers, impatiently.

 “Azrael, I got an idea, killer.”

 

____________

 

August 14, 2020, Day 5 of Mob Combat Training

 

Michael stands on shaking legs as exhaustion threatens his vision, he fights back vomit as he pulls in air to slow his heart rate. ‘Why is he like this? What have I done wrong?’ Sweat stings his golden eyes as he struggles to remain at attention. Azrael circles him, his expression unreadable. 

“Do you know why your training has been different lately, Michael?” *thump thump thump*

“N-*retch* N-no sir.” Michael wheezes out, his heartbeat roars in his ears as he strains to remain still. A coughing fit rises in his chest.

“To make sure you haven’t lost your touch, your edge. And so far, I am pleased with the results, well done, you. A whole seven hours of non-stop combat and you’re still standing, You are ready.” Azreal continues to circle his brother.

‘Ready?’ “Per-permission, *wheeze* permission to speak?” Michael asks, confusion etching his flush face, his stomach turns.

“Granted.” Azrael permits, stopping his pacing to look at him.

“I- *COUGH COOOOUGH wheeeze* Michael can’t stop the cough fit from bubbling up as he tries to speak, his chest burns with a metallic tinge at the back of his throat. He doubles over as the spell shakes his frame, saliva building in his mouth. The training room door slams open.

“Michael? Azrael?” Gabriel asks as he walks into the torn up training room. Seeing Michael hunched over coughing, Gabriel rushes over to him, lowering him to his knees. "Heaven's blessings Azrael, what did you do to him?” Gabriel demands as Michael retches, liquid catching in his throat, he throws his hand over his mouth.

“What did I say about you and Raphael coddling him!?” Azrael hisses, glaring angrily at the messenger. “How can he possibly be ready if you two undo my training at every turn?”

*HUUUUUURRK ACK GUUUUGH* Vomit splashes on the floor as Michael’s body finally gives out, purging water and mucus from his system. *cough cough sniff* A long line of drool drips from his lips as Gabriel holds him steady.

“He is our finest warrior and our most skilled fighter! Do you forget that he is the one who fought Roo and her legion back and protected Heaven!” Gabriel argues back as he helps Michael to his feet, supporting most of his weight. 

“That was right after Eden, eons ago. And he,” Azrael jabs his finger at Michael, “almost didn’t survive that battle! He hasn’t fought a true battle since then! If anything,” He begins his pacing again, “I’ve been coddling him.” Azrael shoots a look of disgust at Michael, who tries in vain to lift his head. “That is why- on your feet soldier!” Azrael grabs the front of Michael’s sweat-soaked blue shirt and yanks him from Gabriel’s arms, shooting Gabriel a challenging look before the messenger could protest. “You, Michael, will be joining Adam on this upcoming extermination.”

Michael lifts his heavy head, going in and out of consciousness, he barely registers the words spoken to him. His eyes go dim and glaze over, tunneling vision quickly taking over. ‘Extermination?’ Michael hears Gabriel’s voice from far away arguing with Azrael, it is getting dark, he’s going to pass out. “Ye-yessir.” Michael’s eyes roll to the back of his head as he collapses unconscious, Azrael being the only thing keeping him from hitting the marble ground. 

Gabriel snatches Michael from Azrael, almost ripping his sweat-soaked shirt in the process. Scooping him up, Gabriel makes sure Michael’s head rests on his thin shoulder. Feeling the high temperature of his skin, Gabriel glares at Azrael, “You really think you’re helping him, huh? Is this torture going to keep him ready? Is it going to keep Heaven safe?”

“Sera has already signed off on the idea and agrees with my decision! Michael is to join Adam and help lead this upcoming extermination!” Azrael declares, his broad chest puffs out with his hands clasped behind his back.

“Michael does not need to be a part of that!” Gabriel snaps, “He’s given enough-”

“He is Heaven’s protector and the High Court will see to it that he is still ready! You cannot overturn this, he’s going!” Azrael hisses. Gabriel can only look at his brother in disbelief. 

“Michael is not some trained beast we keep caged up… he’s our brother.” Gabriel whispers, holding Michael protectively.

“He is the twin of the one who chose a fantasy over his family, I will not have the same mistake happen twice.” Azrael snarls, getting in Gabriel’s face, “Father named Michael The Spear of Heaven. That is his purpose, that is his duty to uphold, and it is my responsibility to ensure that this blade is forever sharpened. Now take him to Raphael and don’t let anyone see.” Azrael pushes past the two and exits the training room. Gabriel watches as he leaves and looks down to Michael, seeing the wear on his brother’s exhausted face, tears begin to sting hazel eyes. 

“I’m sorry, Michael.” Gabriel whispers as his voice breaks. He kisses the top of Michael’s head as tears fall into the damp, golden locks, “I’m so sorry.” Michael doesn’t hear him.

________________________

Present day- Extermination Day is Successful

 

The sound of the bugle rings out. Adam and Michael are the last ones through the portal, ensuring it closes. 

”HOOOOOOOLLLY SHIT! THAT WAS ALMOST BETTER THAN SEX!!!” Adam huffs out, “Yo, you went so fuckin’ crazy down there, it was beautiful!!” Michael is silent. “Fuck, I’m starving! Let’s hit the showers and then get some food. Meet me at the steakhouse in an hour!” Adam slaps Michael on the shoulder before flying away. Michael didn’t hear a word Adam said.

Michael walks silently to his quarters and closes the door behind him, leaning on it as his knees give out. He slowly slides down the door, leaving a bloody streak in his wake. His sword makes a sharp SCCCRRTT as it scrapes against the floor. He hastily goes to unfasten his belt, but his thick, bloodied gloves are getting in the way; he rips them off and whips them away. Freeing himself of his belt, he shoves the weapon away from him. ‘Can’t breathe, I CAN’T BREATHE!’ A shaking hand peels off the mask, revealing the horror-stricken expression on Michael’s face as he tries to pull in air.

Blood drips off the mask as he places it on the ground beside him. He lifts his eyes to scan the room, confused as to how he got there. He sees his dresser, trunk, desk, and chair, stopping at the mirror. A blood-soaked man sits in a trembling heap against a door, the only clean part of him is his pure white face. ‘Who is that?’ Panic rises in his chest as tears fall freely from his eyes, the man in the mirror does the same. 

“Wh-who are you?” Michael stares at the image, waiting for an answer.

It doesn’t answer back.

Notes:

Ooooohh shit, The warrior has joined the fight. Albeit very much against his will, but when the higher ups say jump, just dissociate and answer “How high?”. Yeesh

Chapter 26: Why Smile?

Summary:

It’s one week after the extermination and Emily is none the wiser! The Seraphim of Joy was just planning on having a lovely lunch with her older sister when she makes some shocking new discoveries about the welfare of angels

Notes:

Hey y’all sorry for the late entry. Work keeps us at the site until well after midnight and I come home absolutely dead. I’ll do my best to be more consistent, no promises.

Date: August 23, 2020

Age: Ancient

Location: High Angelic Courthouse H.A.C.

Weather: Perfect as always

Current Conditions: It’s lunchtime and the gossip is juicy.

 

Emily waves a cheerful hello to the blessed citizens of Heaven as she flies overhead, her smile radiating as bright and beautiful as the sun. The Winners cheer back and greet the Seraphim of Joy, watching her fly by. She giggles brightly and continues towards the H.A.C. to have lunch with her big sister. She lands daintily at the entrance of the large building, the giant golden trimmed doors open for her as she steps in. She greets the guards with a bright smile, who answer with a wave.

‘Now, what should we eat for lunch today?’ Emily asks herself as she hums her way through the spacious, glass lobby. Approaching the front desk, a bumblebee angel sits with dark wavy hair pulled into a high, neat beehive, a pair of sharp, green eyes and two pairs of arms, each busy with their own job. She sits, typing away at her computer furiously with one pair, while the other jots down notes in a honey-themed planner, her pink hexagonal framed glasses sit low on her face. Emily politely clears her throat to get her attention, “Hi Mabel, is Sera in?” The receptionist glances up at the seraphim and perks up immediately, her bee wings flapping happily. 

“Hello Your Holiness, how are you today?” Mabel asks gracefully, her posh, British accent bouncing with each word, “Her Majesty is currently in a meeting right now, just started I’m afraid.” Emily’s lower lip juts out in disappointment.

“Oh boo, I was hoping to catch her before the meeting,” Emily pouts as she crosses her arms, “I thought it started in an hour.”

“That was the original plan, but,” Mabel does a deep scope of the lobby, ensuring no one is listening, then gestures for Emily to lean in closer. Emily bends over the desk to hear the secretary clearly, “Apparently, there was an incident involving one of the archangels last night.” Mabel whispers, looking left and right. Emily gasps, her hands fly to her face in shock.

“What!” She cries out. Mabel shushes her sharply and Emily throws her hands over her mouth, “What?” She whispers-shouts. “Is anyone hurt?” Mabel shakes her head.

“That’s all I know. But I’ve been told to cancel everyone’s schedule for the rest of the day for this meeting, but you didn’t hear it from me.” The angels look around again to ensure no one eavesdropped, “In the history of this courthouse, that has only happened once. And that was before you were born, Your Holiness.” Emily’s eyes widen and her mouth drops agape. 

“My goodness, don’t worry I won’t tell anyone about this and I’ll try to get some information myself.” Emily reassures Mabel as she straightens back up, “I wonder what in Paradise could’ve called for such action.” She ponders to herself, looking at Mabel, she smiles warmly, “Thank you Mabel, have a lovely day.”

“Same to you, Your Holiness.” Mabel wishes back, her bee wings fluttering happily.

“Please, call me Emily. We’re friends aren’t we?” Emily giggles, “I don’t how many times I’ve told you it’s fine to call me by my name, silly!” Mabel gives a worried smile and tucks a loose strand of black hair back into place.

“I understand, Your Holi- Emily. Unfortunately, my boss, Lord Azrael, is very strict on proper bearing and honorifics.” Mabel adjusts the glasses on her face. “If he would relax the rules a little, I’d be happy to call you as you wish.” Emily crosses her arms and frowns.

“Oh, that Azrael is such a grouch sometimes, honestly.” She grumbles, “It’s my name, and if I want to be addressed as such then it should be fine!” Shaking her head, she decides she’ll bring that issue up with Sera later. “I’m gonna go have lunch, Mabel, care to join?” Emily asks hopefully. 

Mabel heaves a sad sigh, “I just had lunch, unfortunately, and my next break isn’t for a few hours from now. I’m sorry, dear.” Emily smiles sympathetically and shakes her head.

“Don’t worry, it’s fine! I’ll stop by later to bring you a treat.” Emily flits off before Mabel can decline, “See you later, Mabel!” Emily calls as she backs away, almost bumping into a potted plant, “Whoops! Excuse me!” She chuckles embarrassingly before turning around.

The secretary leans back watching the young angel take off and lets out a small laugh, “That girl is too good for this place.” She whispers to herself before she gets back to work. 

 

Emily makes her way to the cafeteria, greeting everyone she passes on her way there. As she offers to help a mail courier who is carrying too many packages, she bumps hard into a body, nearly knocking her down. Oof!  “Oops, I’m so sorry! Are you alr-” She stops mid-sentence as she stares at the worn look on Michael’s face. The dark circles under his eyes give him a sunken look and his golden cheeks are lackluster. Despite his skin being alabaster white, he somehow looks ghostly pale. 

Emily is completely shocked at the sight before her, she had seen Michael hundreds of times before, but he always carried himself in pristine condition. She never got a chance to really sit down and talk to him; however, everytime she greeted him, he would answer with a polite nod or a simple ‘Hello’ back. But right now, he seems to be looking past her, his golden eyes are dull and Emily isn’t sure if he even registered that they bumped into each other. Instantly worried, she tilts her head slightly to get in his eyeline. 

“Michael?” She asks gently, slowly reaching out to touch his shoulder, “Are you alright?” He gives no response, his mind completely someplace else. The moment her fingertip touches his shoulder, he jumps. Six golden wings spring out and accidentally hit a few by-passers in the hallway. Emily lets out a sharp yelp and yanks her hand back, “AH! Sorry! I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you!” Michael breathes heavily as he looks around wildly.

“What?! What are you…ugh.” Michael holds his head and stumbles back a bit. Emily grabs his arm and steadies him, her blue eyes wide with worry. Michael looks up at Emily, the image of her going in and out of focus as he blinks to clear his vision. He lets out a low groan and rubs his eyes with his fingers, ahem. “Thank you, Emily.” Clearing his throat, he retracts his wings and pulls his arm back, steadying his breath, “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch what you said just now.” Emily holds her hands out towards him, worried that he might lose his balance again. 

“I-I asked if you were alright, but clearly you’re not.” Emily is terribly confused, angels can’t get sick, can they? She doesn’t even know if they could get tired. She’s never been tired, yet here Michael is, struggling to stay on his feet, “What is the matter? Do you need help?” 

Straightening himself up, Michael shakes his head, “No, no, I’m fine. I was just a bit distracted.” He dismisses politely, “Thank you for asking, have a nice day.” He steps around Emily and continues on his way. She turns to watch him leave, her face is fraught with worry as her fingers fidget with the collar of her dress. 

‘I should leave him be…right?’ She debates with herself as she continues to watch Michael walk away. ‘He said he was fine, but…’ “Mmmmm,” Letting out a high pitched whine, she bounces on her feet, struggling with her indecision. “He…he said he’s okay.” She grunts out in frustration. She turns around sharply and marches on to the cafeteria. Approaching the chef, Emily places an order for lunch, “Grilled chicken salad with chocolate pudding please.” The chef nods and jots down the order. Emily thinks for a moment and gasps excitedly, “Actually, may I have two orders of that to-go instead, please?” 

 

Carrying her food, she makes her way to Michael’s office and knocks, “Michael, are you busy?” There’s no answer from behind the door, “I got some lunch, would you like to join me?” More silence. Emily frowns, something doesn't feel right, “Knock, knock, I’m coming in.” She grabs the door handle and turns, slowly opening the heavy door. It stops partially open, hitting something on the floor. Trying to get a view of what was blocking it, she peeks her head in, “Micha-” GASP!

Michael is face down on the floor, unmoving. Emily drops the food and squeezes her way through the narrow gap, kneeling down to Michael’s unconscious body. “MICHAEL!” She cries and violently shakes his shoulder. He lets out a low groan, but doesn’t respond, “Ohmigosh, ohmigosh, oooooohhh goodness, oh!” She looks around frantically, ‘Help, I need to get help!’ Tears start to gather in her blue eyes as Emily wraps her arms around Michael’s torso and drags him away from the door, ensuring it won’t hit him again, “St-stay here, I’m gonna get help!” She dashes out of the office and races down the hallway. 

‘Sera, need to find Ser-’ Emily spots a figure up ahead, “ADAM!” She calls out as the first man rounds the corner towards her. Slurping his beverage obnoxiously, the yellow eyes of his mask widens as Emily charges at him.

“Ah, shit, what!” He jumps, not expecting the girl at all. Emily skids to a halt, just avoiding slamming into him, “E, where’s the fire?” She grabs Adam’s long sleeve and yanks him back down the hallway, causing him to drop his drink, “My root beer! Em, what’s the matter?” Adam asks again, almost tripping over his robes as Emily pulls him off balance.

“Michael needs help!” Emily sobs as they run down the hallway, “He- he’s unconscious on his office floor!” Adam’s mouth drops open before he takes flight, taking the seraphim with him.

_________________________

 

Voices echo through the darkness, they sound familiar. ‘My head hurts, what happened?’ Michael tries to open his eyes, but his eyelids feel like concrete, his whole body is heavy like lead.

“...needs to rest!” Someone is arguing, “....happened…too far…” ‘Gabriel?’ Michael’s face contorts as he struggles to open his eyes, finally one peeks open. He is in his bed, someone is holding his hand with another person standing behind them. Blinking, his vision clears up a bit, barely able to distinguish facial features. 

“He didn’t look well earlier, either.” Emily chimes in, “I had accidentally bumped into him in the hallway and spooked him. He lost his balance and I had to hold him upright, I should’ve spoken up sooner.” Michael feels his hand being squeezed, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know he was sick. I didn’t know angels could even get sick!”

“We can’t,” Raphael answers, “We can, however, get overtaxed, especially if we’re overworked and stressed out like he is.” He looks down to his brother and notices his eyes are slowly starting to open. He places a cool hand on his clammy forehead and pours his healing energy into him, “Shhh, go back to sleep, it’s okay.” Michael’s eyes roll to the back of his head, falling back asleep with his chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. Ensuring that Michael is in a deep sleep, Raphael stands and walks up to Gabriel, Sera and Azrael, “He is on bed rest for the next three days to get some much needed sleep.” Azrael goes to argue, but Raphael glows, ready to unleash his biblical form. 

Sera steps between the two, “Enough, Gabriel, you will take Michael’s post until he returns to duty. Raphael, I leave him in your care, please see to it that he returns to full form and keep me updated on his condition. Azrael, a word in private please?” Azrael gives his brother a dark glare before shoving past him and Gabriel, storming out of the bedroom. The two look at one another and follow him out. Sera crosses the large suite over to Emily and Adam, who still sit by Michael’s bedside. Emily looks to her big sister and stands.

“Is Michael going to be okay?” She asks as she grabs her sister’s hand and looks up worriedly. Sera smoothes hair away from Emily's face and smiles gently.

“He will be completely fine, don’t worry. He just needs some rest.” Sera reassures,“Thank you both for helping him. For now, let’s leave him to rest, Raphael will be by his side soon to look after him.” Emily worriedly looks at Michael one last time before flying out of the room. Adam begins to walk by Sera when she calls his name, forcing him to halt.

“Adam, moment please.” Sera softly orders, “I need to get some information before speaking to Azrael.” Adam raises an eyebrow, he crosses his arms.

“Um yeah, sure thing.” He answers, turning towards her. ‘The fuck does she wanna know?’.

“You said Michael did well during the extermination, correct?” Sera asks as she walks up to the foot of his bed and watches his chest rise and fall softly. “He had the highest number of sinner kills?”

“Yeah, 432, a new record!” Adam grins widely. “Didn’t even use his Holy Light or any of his powers, all sword.” The first man thinks back on the day fondly; the archangel was a whirlwind of death, bodies dropped and blood spilled, terrified screams rang out. Adam had never seen anything like it, and he was the top executioner before Michael joined. Sera’s face gave nothing away. 

“How was his behavior?” She continues, folding her hands in front of her. “Before and after I mean.”

Adam picks his teeth with his pinky, “Well before, he didn’t look that pumped. No pep in his step whatsoever, almost like he didn’t want to be there. I mean, I don’t think he slept at all the day before.” He remembers the dark circles under Michael’s eyes and the downcast expression on his face, “He didn’t chime in either when it came time to rally up the troops, probably psyching himself up or somethin’.” He examines the food now free from his teeth and flicks it away, causing Sera to grimace, “As for after, I invited him out to celebrate with me and the girls, but the whole time he just staaaaarred aheeeaaad…”

Adam trails off as he fully remembers the day, Michael was damn near catatonic in the club, no matter how much Adam tried to get him to eat or drink. “Y’know, now that I’m not blackout drunk, he may not have had as great a time as the girls ‘n I did. The rest of us were riding the high of the big day, but he didn’t speak at all after, just kinda sat there. Probably was fightin’ to stay awake, the guy looks worse than he did last week.” Adam gestures over to Michael sleeping, “Yeah, the dark circles under his eyes look deeper.” He looks up to Sera and raises an eyebrow, “Why, somethin’ happen?”.

Sera stares at the archangel with a worried expression on her face, and says nothing, “Sera? Sera!” She jumps slightly and turns to Adam. He watches her with a concerned look on his face, “Did somethin’ happen?” He asks again. She lingers for a long moment then shakes her head.

“Nothing you need to concern yourself with.” She answers curtly and clears her throat, “Thank you for your time Adam, you’re dismissed.” Turning on her heel, Sera briskly exits the room, Adam turns to watch her leave. He crosses his arms and tilts his head, his eyes narrow in suspicion as he grumbles.

“Yeah, no problem, boss.”

Notes:

If y’all like the story so far, let me know! I’d love to talk to y’all and answer what I can.

Chapter 27: Little Bit of Elbow Grease

Summary:

Our darling Princess of Hell has just bought a ratted, old building with all the potential in the Seven Rings of Hell. Let's do a walkthrough with her to see what to get started on first with this fixer-upper!

Notes:

Hey y'all, I'm back from vacation! I was visiting a childhood friend that's stationed over in Germany and we ripped it up! We went to see a FFVII orchestra, Tarzan: The Musical, castle, cathedrals, and all the booze and food we could eat! 11/10 would go again!

Here's a fun a game, find how many pop culture references are in this chapter :D

Have fun!

Date : September 14, 2020

Age: 202

Location : Happy Hotel (In progress)

Weather: Cool and brisk autumn day

Current Conditions: Feelin’ cute and girly, ready to take on a weekend DIY project.

Creeeeeaaakkkk, boom! The damaged doors of the old building are pushed open, kicking up dust in all directions. Cough, cough “Okay gu- HACK! Ugh…Okay guys, we’re here!” Charlie sings dryly as she fights the dust in her throat. She looks around the first floor with a shining smile on her face. Splintered pillars strain dangerously under the weight of the collapsing ceiling and the floor is decorated with deep divots and cracks. She lets out an excited squeal, tapping her feet giddily. “Razzle, Dazzle, can you believe this place is ours?” The princess asks, twirling around open space, "Doesn't it make you want to cry?"

“Over there will be the front desk!” Charlie sings, pointing at the western wall. “And over here can be the parlor, where we’ll bond and do trust exercises!” She laughs gesturing to the opposite side of the room. “And-and right here, is where we can do morning yoga and GROUP HUGS!” She hugs herself and spins in a tight circle, her beautiful long hair landing across her face. As Charlie looks around, hope builds in her heart and lights a fire in her belly, “Let’s go check out the rest of the place before we start cleaning up okay?” The two butler demons look warily at one another before following their princess up the stairs. 

The rotted wood creaks loud under the princess’s heel as she climbs. Placing her foot down, the step gives under her weight and cracks, clutching her foot and tripping her, “Whoop!” Charlie catches herself on the railing before landing on her belly, “Okay Mr. Stairs, I grunt need aarrgh myyyyy foot!” She grabs hold of her leg and yanks her foot free, unfortunately her shoe does not come with it. She hears the poor garment fall into the depths of the staircase, landing with a soft thump . Charlie stares at her pink rainbow sock and wiggles her hooves, “Aw, I lost my shoe.” She pouts, “Well, I’ll rescue it later along with adding ‘Fixing the Stairs' to the ‘To-Do’ list.” Standing up and dusting off the dirt, Charlie continues up the stairs.

Reaching the top, Charlie turns to her right and looks down the pitch black hallway. Placing her hand along the wall, she feels for a light switch until her fingers brush against one, “Ah, there you are.” She flicks the switch up. Nothing. Click, click, clickclickclick… “ Huh, okay, no problem, for I have my,” Reaching into her pink hoodie pocket, she fishes out her phone and turns on the flashlight, “Da-da-da-daaaa! Cell phone!” Singing out her fanfare as she holds her phone out in front of her and begins walking. 

The small light does little to illuminate the wide hallway, only giving dim glimpses of doors that lead into bedrooms. Charlie lets out a breath from her mouth, cold clouds puff around her face and quickly dissipate as the temperature suddenly drops. ‘Little bit chilly. Really gotta check to see if the electricity works here.’ She adds the task to the mental list of things to do as she walks on. The floorboards creak quietly under the carpet as she presses on, taking in the red rundown wallpaper and the apple theme molding that line the walls, “I wonder what the floor plans of the rooms are like.” Charlie asks out loud as she stops in front of a door and places her hand on the knob and turns. The door lets out a high-pitched whine as Charlie steps though. And freezes. 

“Ho-ly SHIT! WHY!?” Gnarled, grotesque skeletons are piled high in the center of the bed. The mattress is in an intense state of decay while sigils scribbled along the wall and floor with dozens of candles in melted heaps, all burned down to the ends of their wicks. A banner that reads BACHELORETTE PARTY hangs in tatters above the smashed out windows, letting in a chill breeze as hell rats (still a thing) scatter, taking bones with them. A loud mob of large, red bugs swarm up as the wind stirs them. 

A scream gets caught in Charlie’s throat at the shocking sight as her mouth hangs open as she takes in the horrific sight. Razzle and Dazzle take a peek from behind her shoulders and quickly hide again, trembling. A moment passes that Charlie stands there frozen, then another after another until Dazzle gently shakes her shoulder. The contact makes her take a sharp intake of breath, inhaling one of the large bugs by accident. She can feel the legs fight against the roof of her mouth as the long wings beat across her sharp teeth. 

Screaming, she spits it out on the floor, its body making a noticeable thump when it lands, “AAAAAAAHHHH! Haaaack, pi-too, blegh! NO, OMIGOSH!” Charlie blindly leaps out of the room and slams the door close before swatting all over her face and torso, her knees bouncing high to her chest in an attempt to get the bugs off her. After a minute, she finally calms down and begins to relax her breathing. Scritch, scritch, scritch. She turns towards the sound and sees Razzle scratching frantically against the door, “Razzle no, we don’t want to go back in the-.”

“Eeeee…” A sad whine from behind the door interrupts Charlie, followed by more scratches. She gasps sharply and runs, flinging it the door to let the poor goat demon out, she scoops him up.

“Dazzle! I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to leave you in there! I thought you were behind me!” Charlie squeezes Dazzle tight to her chest and buries her cheek into the top of his hair. Razzle nuzzles his brother for comfort as the poor thing trembles slightly.

“C’mon guys, let’s get away from here.” Charlie ushers her two companions back towards the staircase. “We’ll add fumigation to the list of musts, because, ugh!” She shudders remembering how the bug felt in her mouth. After making it back downstairs, Charlie holds Dazzle out in front of her, “Dazzle, are you okay?” He gives her a nod before taking flight again. Smiling softly, the demon princess takes a deep breath and lets it out. “Okay, not the best conditions, but we knew this was a fixer-upper when we got it. We’re bound to run into a lot more downs before we get some ups. Don’t lose heart, okay?.” The twin demons nod in tandem, both encouraged by her pep talk. Charlie claps her manicured hands together, “You two go see if you can find the circuit breaker and let me know if we can get some power in this place and I’ll start making a list what other tasks will need to be taken care of first. Then we can end the day with a clean up, sound good?” 

Razzle and Dazzle bow to the princess and fly off in search of the circuit breaker. Charlie heaves a sigh and small smile. Pushing her bangs out of her face, she looks up and says to herself, “Don’t lose heart, Charlie. You’re gonna save your people.” She conjures up her heart decorated notebook and a fuzzy pen< “Okay, pest control, rubbish removal, wallpaper…” Looking down at her sock foot, she adds to the list, “New shoes, stair repair…” She paces around the area and writes down what she’ll need when the lights flicker on, “ALRIGHT GUYS! GREAT JOB!” Charlie cheers as she jumps up and down in celebration. ‘Things are already starting to look up.’  

Looking up, indeed.

Notes:

So, it's a helluva fixer upper, but she's living her dream. It's a helluva fixer upper, how many more rooms can make her scream? Ngl, I had a bug fly in my mouth before and I almost quit life. Good Luck, Charlie

Chapter 28: Belay My Last

Summary:

Gunny tries to get his life together. With the help of Toner and reluctant help from Byson, maybe he can start to mend the relationship between him and Sojourner.

Date: November 11, 2020

Age: Deader than dead

Location: Devil Dog’s Mechanic and Repairs

Weather: Chilly Autumn Day

Conditions: A tense household with a lot of silence

“No problem, I can stop by tomorrow Eggy, don’t worry.” Sojourner confirms the repair job before hanging up her work phone and fishing out her keys. It had been a very long day and the bus ride home turned into a complete nightmare when that large slug sinner decided to grace her with his bare, jiggling physique for half of the trip. 

She shudders, trying to shake the memory of the slug demanding her to ‘Touch my parts’, finally backing off when she pulls out her glowing, hot soldering iron and threatens to solder important bits. ‘The fuck is wrong with sinners?’ Running her hand down her face, the sailor opens the door to Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electrical Repairs and locks it behind her. She flips the Open sign to Closed and pulls down the heavy metal sheet protectors on the windows then locks them in place. Sojourner inspects that the shop is completely locked up before walking behind the desk and through the door leading to her and Gunny’s apartment.

Entering the dark room, she flips on the light to the kitchen and stops, confused. The kitchen is spotless, not just okay, like she left it this morning, but spotless. The counters are clear, save for the appliances that are normally there, the fridge has been scrubbed, the floor has been swept and mopped, the sink has been wiped, and the dishes have been cleaned and put away. She opens the fridge and finds a clean interior with fresh groceries, not the neverending expired food and take-out boxes that stayed no matter how much she threw them away. Closing the door, she looks to the lounge area and finds it in the same condition. The rug is vacuumed and the coffee table is clear of junk and dishes. The couch is free of crumbs and the recliner looks like it had been shampooed. 

“Whaaaat?” Sojourner drones as she slowly rotates in a circle to take in the clean apartment. She takes a strong whiff and inhales the powerful scent of Fabuloso , ‘Is this a prank? Did someone break in here and clean?’ Taking Hot Mic off her waist, she goes to place him in his basket beside her spot on the couch and freezes. “Yo, are these new pillows?” She asks out loud, looking at the fresh new pillows that now lined Hot Mic’s basket. Placing the tool pouch in his bed, he snuggles in and purrs happily, his yellow eyes closing in content as he hugs his belt around himself. Sojourner chuckles, “Enjoy yourself, buddy.” She unzips the front of her olive green coveralls and shimmies off the top. Untucking her tan work shirt, she heaves a tired sigh, “What the fuck is going on?” She whispers to herself as she pulls her hair free from its bun. Massaging her scalp with her fingertips, she heads upstairs to start her wind down for the night, starting with a hot shower. 

________________

Throwing away at least 50 bags of trash at the dump

“Real talk, man, you owe us BIG for this.” Toner grunts as he chucks the last of the trash bags into the dumpster, “I understand you’re working on shit, and I see you trying, but goddamn, dude.” Gunny rubs the back of his head in embarrassment. It wasn’t like he was trying to live in a sty, but for the afterlife of him, he couldn’t make himself upkeep the living standards of a proud marine. His lack of motivation got even worse after this last extermination.

He was surprised Sojourner even wanted to go through with it, given how little the two have spoken to each other since the van painting incident. Regardless, the two operated in perfect tandem and saved over 40 sinners by utilizing the sewer pipes and flanking maneuvers. They had two close encounters with exorcists, but managed to get away in a big part to Sojourner’s quick thinking and blossoming repel ability. When the two returned home, she congratulated him on a job well done and he said… nothing. Absolutely nothing, not even a nod, he didn’t even look at her. ‘Why didn’t you say anything, you fuckin’ idiot?’ Gunny curses himself for the number of times only Satan knows. 

Toner notices the grimace on his friend’s face and shakes him, “Oy, which time are you thinking about? Is it the extermination again?” Gunny gives him a sad smile and slumps his shoulders. 

“Sorry man, I’m just really nervous. What if I’m too late to fix anythin’?” He fidgets with the dog tags around his thick neck. “I fucked up so much, there’s no way she’s gonna even listen…” 

“You sound like a bitch, dog” Byson, the ox sinner comments as he bites his fingernails, “Aren’t you supposed to be rough n’ rowdy soldier or somethin’?” Gunny’s ears snap flat against his head, he absolutely hates the newest recruit of Toner’s. The kid has a smart mouth and didn’t seem to care who he ran it at, rubbing several painters the wrong way. Gunny especially hates how the ox would pretend to be a gentleman to Sojourner’s face when she came to visit then say the sleaziest things he wanted to do to her when she wasn’t around. Thankfully Toner doesn’t play that shit and has painfully corrected the kid more than a few times, unfortunately that didn’t stop Byson from leering at her when she came by. 

“I’m a Marine , yak!” He snarls and bares his teeth. “And what does me bein’ a Marine got to do with anythin’?” 

Byson shrugs as he hikes up his tattered jeans and fixes his gray hoodie over the hem. “Just saying, you have no problem running around on Extermination Day, risking your afterlife with this girl. Yet, despite livin’ with her, you’re nervous? Smells like bitch to me.”He smirks at Gunny smugly. 

Gunny stomps up to him and gets in his face. “You got one more again to call me a bitch, cow.” He growls darkly, challenging him. “I dare you.” Toner steps in between the two demons and pushes them apart. 

“Basta ya, los dos!” His blue flames kick up and force both of them to take a step back. Toner yanks down Byson by his hood to meet his eyes, “You better fuckin’ watch who you’re talking to niño, I’m not going to keep reminding you about minding your fuckin’ manners.” He shoves Byson away before looking at Gunny, “And Chess, relájate y respira profundamente. This is a step in the right direction, and tonight, the only goal is to have a simple conversation. Nothin’ heavy, just a small conversation.” Gunny’s glare lingers on Byson for a few seconds more before looking at Toner and nodding. 

“Just a small conversation.” He agrees, Toner smiles and slaps his arm lightly before he heads back to the van, hopping in the passenger’s seat. Gunny begins around to walk to the driver’s seat when he hears Byson mutter. 

“When she blows you off, I’ll be there to snatch her up, bitch.” Gunny’s eyes close as he takes a breath then releases it slowly. Inside the van, Toner clicks on his phone to check his messages when suddenly, the van rocks violently, causing him to almost lose his grip. 

“¿Qué carajo?” Toner’s head whips around as the back door opens and Byson’s limp body is carelessly tossed into the back with a hard THUD! The sliding door slams closed, rocking the van again. Heavy footsteps circle the van, the driver’s door opens and Gunny calmly climbs in, shaking his right hand before flexing his fingers a few times. Toner looks between Byson and Gunny with a shocked expression on his skull face as Gunny turns the key in the ignition and the van’s engine roars to life. “Did you kill him?” The painter finally asks. 

Gunny looks behind his seat to the ox lying in a heap and grabs an empty cup from his cup holder. He chucks the trash and it bounces off of the sinner’s head. “Nggghh…” A low moan comes from Byson, but he remains still. 

Gunny turns back around and pulls the seatbelt across his broad chest before shifting the gear to drive. “Nah, he’s fine. Poor lil’ fella is jus’ all tuckered out” He pulls out of the dump and drives back to the Tone Death Paint Shop. Toner shakes his head and sits back to look at his phone. Byson wakes up as they pull up to the paint garage, Toner opens the side door to help him exit the vehicle. The ox gingerly touches his busted nose and pain sears through his skull, making him screw his eyes shut in agony. “Eso es lo que obtienes, tonto.” Scolds Toner, gently pushing Byson to the front door, “You’re still working tomorrow too.” Byson shoots him a dirty look before going inside. Toner clicks his teeth and walks to Gunny’s open window, “You gonna be okay, Perro?”

Gunny’s hands grip the steering wheel tightly, would he be okay? All he can think about is how badly he’s messed up his relationship with Sojourner. It had almost been a year since they had that conservation outside of that Jackass’s shop, and the only thing he took away from it was that she wasn’t interested in him or anyone. After that, he pulled away from her harshly and started acting out. A flood of memories hit him like a freight train: him snapping at her, ignoring her, the fights, the yelling. The crushed look on her face, the sadness in her eyes, her crying in her room. He leans his head on the steering wheel. “Tones, I can’t do this.” He whispers, his chest squeezes, his heart begins beating wildly against his chest, “It’s no use, I lost her, she hates me.” 

The skull looks sadly at his friend, it pains him to see such a strong person this broken, knowing how sorry he is. “So you’re jus’ gonna leave her like this?” He asks as he leans his side against the door, resting his chin against his fist. “You’re gonna keep feeling sorry for yourself and ditch Mami?” He watches Gunny’s pointed ears fall flush against his head. “Didn’t you swear you’d never abandon her? That was back when you first met, right?” Gunny lifts his head, misery blatant on his face as he looks over to his fiery friend and lets out a small whine. 

“Come with me…please.” Gunny’s voice is small, “I- I don’t know if I can keep it together without shutting down.” Toner pauses for a few moments then nods. 

“Get out, let me drive, Perro.” The two friends swap places and head to the mechanic’s shop. 

____________

2133, Devil-Dog Mechanical and Electrical Repairs- Living Room

Sojourner selects a relaxation playlist before reaching for her pencil, her hand falls on the soft cushion of the couch, no pencil in sight. She looks to where the pencil used to be. ‘Sojourner, you fool! You broke the #1 rule of artists: never set down the pencil.’ Cursing under her breath, she sets her sketchbook aside and stands up to face the couch. Adjusting her sleep shorts to a more comfortable position, she tosses her thick braids behind her shoulders before lifting up the cushion suspected of snatching her pencil. Underneath it, there's a three inch hole and spot of yellow at the bottom. 

“Of fucking course,” The bear mumbles before dropping to her knees to peer underneath the couch sideways. “Thank god the floor is clean.” She mutters to herself as she presses her face into the rug. She spots the runaway drawing utensil, “Come to Sojo, you little bastard.” She grunts as she slides her hand under the narrow gap between the couch and floor. Her oversized t-shirt bunches up around her ribs as her forearm catches just before her fingertips reach their target.

“Oh, come on!” The sailor cries out exasperatingly. Balancing on her knees and elbows, she tips the couch with both hands and props it up with her outside arm, snatching the pencil before setting the heavy piece of furniture back down. “Ha HA! In your face, graphite!” She celebrates as she stands back up and pulls her shirt back down, it rode up really high. Pulling her shorts out of her nether regions again, she turns to sit back down when she spots something in her peripherals.

”EEEEEEKKK!” She jumps at the unexpected figures and launches the pencil blindly, it harmlessly lands far to the left and rolls on the floor. Holding her heart, she gets a good look and heaves a sigh of relief. Gunny and Toner are standing right behind the recliner, the painter’s flames are bright magenta while Gunny’s mouth hangs open. Sojourner lets out a little laugh and pulls out her earbuds. “Damn, you guys scared me. I guess I scared you too when I screamed just now, sorry.” The two demons don’t move, mesmerized by the sight they walked in on, a back view of Sojourner retrieving her pencil, including her, ahem, slight wardrobe malfunctions, “Guys?” The bear asks as the two men continue to stand there, “You good?” 

Toner is the first to snap out of it, forcing out a flustered cough as he looks away. “¿Hola, Mami, cómo estas?” He squeaks out. ‘Acabo de ver todo…’ Suddenly, Toner is very grateful he decided to tag along.

Sojourner smiles warmly at her friend, “Estoy bien, gracias. Y tu?” She replies and gestures for him to sit down. Adjusting a pant leg slightly, he joins her on the couch, while Gunny remains in place. The pair stare at him, “Gunny, you just gonna stand there?” Sojourner asks, confused. 

The question shakes him out of his trance and he shakes his head, “Ah, no, no, here I come.” He marches to his recliner and sits stiffly at attention, his body not touching the backrest. Sojourner and Toner continue to give him a perplexed look causing the marine’s tail to wag nervously. “Howdy.” He kicks himself mentally, ‘Your hick ass did not just say “Howdy.”’ It takes everything in Toner not to slap his hand over his eyes. 

“Uh…howdy to you, too.” Sojourner greets back, she tries to not let second-hand embarrassment show on her face. The trio sit in an intense awkward silence, no one meeting anyone else’s eyes. ‘This is torture.’ When was the last time she and her military counterpart actually sat down in the same room? On top of that, it’s in the middle of the work week and it’s late, why is Toner over here? Not that she minded at all. After that apology basket of goodies, Sojourner became a regular visitor over at the paint shop. She quickly bonded with the guys over their mutual love of art and even put her paint-and-final-finish qualification to good use by helping out with a few jobs.

Toner became a very close and dear friend to her and often helped ease the friction between her and Gunny, helping him to break down the walls the marine had suddenly stacked around him that shut her out. The two also share a mutual interest in self-help and enjoy spending their mental health days together, engaging in artistic decompression activities. Sojourner has never questioned when Toner pays a visit, but this time seems different, very different. She decides to break the silence. 

“You cleaned the house.” She looks around the sitting area, “It looks really good.” 

Gunny’s mouth draws into a tight line and nods, “Yeah, i-it was long overdue.” He begins to fidget with his dog tags again, “Toner and Byson helped.” Toner waves his hand and grins. 

“Neat, any special occasion?” Sojourner asks as she struggles to keep the conversation from going dead. 

“Uhhh, nope. Nope, nope, nope, just decided it needed to be done. And since, y‘know I’m the one who made the mess, it only seems fittin’ that I should fix it.” Zzzt, zzt, zzt. The metal tags drag across the bead chain as Gunny shifts them back and forth on his neck. “Toner and Byson helped.” ‘Fuck, I just said that.’  

“Yeah, yeah, you, uh… you mentioned that. Thank you, Toner.” Sojourner says quietly as she gives a glance his way. Toner curls in on himself, he looks as though his whole body is about to burst into flames, not just his head. 

‘No puedo soportar mucho más esto’ The painter thinks as the second-hand embarrassment becomes suffocating, “Mm-hmm.” His voice is falsetto, “So, Mami… what’s up with you?” The question comes out as awkward as the rest of the atmosphere and everyone inwardly cringes. Sojourner has had enough and throws her hands up.

“Alright, enough, I can’t take this! None of us can. What the fuck is happening? Tell me.” She demands as she looks between the two men. Toner peeks out from hiding in his corner of the couch and turns to Gunny, who has a petrified look on his face. “Did you do something wrong? Why did you clean the house?” When she’s met with more silence, her eyebrows furrow and she stands up and stomps over to Gunny, nearly standing between his knees,

“Chester, what the fuck is going on with you? Answer me, now! ” He givesno reply, only a wide expression of a deer caught in headlights as her close proximity quickly becomes overwhelming. Sojourner roars in frustration and snatches the brown leather lapel of his tan bomber jacket, yanking him up to her face. She glares into his eyes, “SOUND OFF, MARINE!” 

“I LOVE YOU!” Gunny blurts out and throws his hands over his mouth. Toner’s skeletal jaw drops open as the hollow of his sockets widen in shock. Sojourner’s expression remains unchanged as she drops his lapel and takes a few steps back. The silence turns the room into a powder keg as she takes in this information. ‘Holy shit… holy shit, holy shit, HOLY SHIT!!’ Panic quickly builds in Gunny’s as he watches her face change into something unreadable. ‘What the fuck is that expression?’ Sojourner’s arms fall to her side as she bores her eyes into his. ‘Say something, please.’

Toner doesn’t dare move, slowly he takes shallow breaths as his eye sockets flit back and forth between the couple, “Mami? Say something…” He tentatively asks, bracing himself for whatever happens next. 

Sojourner turns her head to Toner and blinks before turning back towards Gunny. Finally, she crosses her arms as her hip cocks to the side and goes deep into thought. Suddenly, her eyes light up and give a little smile, “I love you too, man. Happy Belated Birthday!” A record scratches.

“Huh?” Gunny deadpans as his hands fall into his lap.

“Que?” Toner moves and sits upright on the couch, “Mami, que?” He cannot believe what he just heard. ‘No hay manera…’ She isn’t for real, is she? No one is this dense, right? In the time they’ve spent together, Toner quickly realized Sojourner was one of the most emotionally intelligent people he’s ever met in life and afterlife. At least he thought she was until this very moment.

Sojourner places her hands on her hips and tilts her head to the side, “Is that why you cleaned the house, as a birthday gift?” She waits for a response. Gunny opens his mouth to answer then closes it. He looks over to Toner, who meets his gaze before they both turn back towards the small bear. She has the blankest expression on her face. Scratching her head, she gives up on getting an answer and continues. “This is a nice surprise, thank you. How about this, now that we have a kitchen again, I’ll cook one of your favorite meals tomorrow as a gift, okay?” 

She gives Gunny a small smile and squeezes his shoulder as she walks towards the stairs. Both of the men turn to watch her leave, “But I meant what I said, I love you too, Chester. Thanks for cleaning up the house, I really appreciate it.” She places one foot on the bottom step before she turns around, “Happy Veteran’s Day!” Gunny simply nods. “‘Night, love you boys!” She says cheerfully and heads upstairs, her bedroom door clicks shut.

The two men look in the direction where Sojourner had gone before turning towards one another. There is a long pause of silence before Toner speaks, “Holy fuck, she’s really dense.” He quietly says in disbelief.

“Yup.” Gunny agrees as his mouth is still in a tight line, “Yyyyup.”

Chapter 29: Ducks in a Row

Summary:

Lucifer is going through it right now. Until some surprise visitors stop by for a wellness check. It's nice to know people are there especially when you're down in the trenches.

Date: December 22, 2020

Age: Ancient

Location: Royal Palace

Weather : Icy and blistering cold

Current Conditions: The saddest week before Sinsmas, like bruh, go outside, please.

 

Duck quacks rings out from Lucifer’s phone to alert him of a text message. A mess of blond hair peeks out from a mountain of pillows and blankets to the phone dangling on the edge of the bed. As he reaches for it, the movement shifts some of the pillows and knocks off the phone of the bed. Lucifer watches it tumble across the carpeted floor before letting out a long, low groan. He grips the edge of the bed and pulls himself over to try and reach his phone, half of his body is over the edge before he realizes his phone is just out of fingertip reach. 

“Damn iiiiit.” He whines, giving up and letting the upper half of his body dangle loosely over the bed, the hood of his fluffy, blood red robe flops over his blond head. “Mmmmm…” Another text alert comes in, then another, and another. The king finally lifts his head to look at his phone, trying in vain to see if he can see the notification of the messages, only to have the robe hood block his vision. Grunting, he pushes the hood off his eyes and begins to fuss with it. The action makes his body shift forwards, causing him to slowly slither out of the warm pile of sheets and into a heap on the floor. Landing softly, he lies there for a moment before sitting up, he has no energy in his angelic body despite sleeping in bed all day. His robe is splayed open, revealing bright pink rubber ducky boxers and a scarred up body. 

‘Whaaaaat, what do you want from meeeee?’ Lucifer whines to himself as he draws up to his knees and scoots over to his fallen device. The screen lights up as it’s lifted to his face and forces his yellow eyes to squint at the brightness. The message icon badge shows notifications in the triple digits with 32 new messages from just today, the latest being from Sex Pest. “Mmmm…” Lucifer grumbles as he rubs his sore eyes and opens the text. ‘Ozzie? Why is he texting?”

“Hey Lulu Baby, we’ll be there in about 10 minutes! 😀” Lucifer stares in confusion at the message, ‘Who’s we?’ He looks at when the message was sent, six minutes ago. “10 minutes, and it's been six, so they’ll be here in four.” Lucifer mumbles the math to himself as he stands up to stretch and tie up his robe. Dropping his phone into his robe’s pocket, he shuffles to the bathroom door for a shower. He freezes right before grabbing the doorknob and thinks about the message again. ‘Four minutes?’ He fishes the smartphone out and looks at the message again. ‘People are coming…’  

He looks around his room and the hundreds of ducks that have conquered the floor and corners. His mind flies to the kitchen that has decayed into a biohazard wasteland of microwave dishes and takeout, “F-f-our… minutes?” The question ends in a high-pitched squeak as his lithe body breaks out into a cold sweat, realizing how badly the palace is run-down.

The garden is overgrown with weeds and dead, crawling ivy. There are more cobwebs than paintings that adorn the walls.  There is so much dust on every surface, that the damn wallpaper looks off-color. The grounds are a mess, the palace is a mess, his bedroom is a mess. CRACK! The phone screen splinters as Lucifer unconsciously squeezes it out of stress, “I’M THE BIGGEST MESS HERE!” He cries out, throwing his phone and gripping handfuls of matted, unwashed hair. He chokes out a tight wheeze, “FFFFFUCK, PEOPLE CAN’T COME HERE! NO ONE CAN COME HERE!” 

Lucifer flails frantically around the room, torn between what to do first. “I need to weed the garden! And dust! I need to dust everywhere! ” He sprints to his bedroom door before skidding to a halt, “No, I need to cook, I have no snacks or wine, but wait, shit, the kitchen is fucked, I can’t cook in there,” He paces around the room, “I-I should call… no-no, they’ll be here any second. I have to- FUCK!” His little hoof slams into a chair filled with ducks and knocks them all to the floor. Swearing quite loudly, Lucifer hops on one hoof while nursing the injured one. A roller derby rubber duck gets underfoot and sends the king face- planting into a high pile of ducks. He lands in an embarrassing heap of squeaky quacks as they cover him completely. 

The angel lies there unmoving as he takes in the past 30 seconds, ‘Maybe if I pretend I’m dead, they’ll leave me alone.’ He thinks bitterly to himself. A duck with a nurse's headband falls and bounces off his head. Quack. It spits a tiny thermometer at his forehead. The bedroom door opens slowly, he tenses up tightly and unconsciously holds his breath.

“Lulu- Baby?” A velvety voice gently calls out, “You in here?” Lucifer doesn’t move or answer.

“Do you see him?” A light, husky voice asks, “I know I heard something fall in here.” Fluttering wings buzz into the room, “Lucifer? Hellooo, where are you, Gumdrop?” 

Bonk. “Shit!” Something thumps against wood as soft, heavy footsteps enter the room.

“Door, Ozzie.” Beelzebub snickers as Asmodeus grumbles and nurses his forehead, the two heads that sit in his light blue mane look at him in concern. The King of Lust shoots an annoyed look at his sister who sticks her tongue at him with a smile, “Lu! Come on, honey, where are you?” She calls gently and opens the bathroom door. 

“We haven’t heard from you or Lili-boo in forever, we just want to check-in.” Ozzie walks over the curtains and draws them back, a cloud of dust kicks up and makes the giant rooster cough. Turning around, Ozzie takes in the room: the messed up bed, the piles of ducks, and stacks of dirty laundry that take up most of the footpaths. The messy bedroom is the only lived in part of the palace. ‘Oh Lulu, what happened?’ His eyebrows tilt up with worry as Bee flies over to him, shaking her head. This is not how the Sin of Lust was expecting the holidays to go, he was getting his club ready for the upcoming Sinsmas celebration when he received a call from Bee. 

She told him that Charlie had called her in tears saying that she couldn’t get a hold of either of her parents and that the queen has been missing for over two years. Hearing that, they gathered the rest of the Sins to see if any of them had heard from the Royal Couple. After several failed attempts of establishing any contact, everyone decided that Ozzie and Bee should be the ones to go do a wellness check on the Sin of Pride. 

“Bee…I’m really worried, now.” Ozzie says softly, “Look at this place, what in all of Hell happened to him?” 

The Sin of Gluttony lands delicately on the ground and rubs his arm, “Hey, hey we’ll find him, I know he’s closeby, don’t worry.” 

Ozzie nods sadly as he continues to look around the room, “I…I just don’t understand, why didn’t he tell us? We could’ve been helping this whole time.” The two heads on his shoulders share the same disheartened look he has. Beelzebub frowns watching her brother’s somber mood. She takes his hand and rubs it in soothing circles.

“It…it’s not easy for some people to reach out when they’re hurting like this.” She gestures to the room, “They might be afraid that they’ll be judged or what others might think of them, especially if they’re expected to be unbreakable.” Bee knows Lucifer can hear her, “It’s really scary to have others know that you’re hurting, y’know?”

Lucifer’s eyes widen as he hears her words, ‘Please… just leave.’ Lucifer doesn’t know why, but panic starts to set in at the thought of being discovered like this. ‘They can’t see me like this.’ His chest tightens and his pulse begins to beat in his ears. His face flushes a deep gold as his body temperature spikes. Tears sting at his eyes and immediately flow over. Trying his damndest not to make a sound, he closes his eyes and holds his breath, causing his body to tremble and shift his makeshift cover of ducks.

Bee’s ears twitch at the slight sound, “But, that’s why we let them know we’ll be here whenever they’re ready to talk and that we love them very, very much.” Ozzie catches on to what she’s doing and mouths if she can hear him. She nods and takes flight again. The two move as quietly as they can over to where Bee can hear him and see the pile of ducks shaking. Kneeling down, the two deadly Sins remove the ducks that cover the small angel’s form, “Oh, Gumdrop…” Bee breathes.

Lucifer curls himself into a tight ball on the floor as he tucks his face into his knees, hugging his legs closer to his chest. A small whimper sneaks out as shame courses through his body. He can’t be seen like this, he’s the Sin of Pride for Hell’s sake, “Go…go away… ” His voice is barely above a whisper as tears continue to stream down his rosy cheeks, “Please…just leave.” A sob leaves his chest as his voice breaks. A large hand runs its fingers through his hair, the touch makes him jump. How long has it been since he’s felt anyone’s presence other than his own? How long has he been here all by himself?

“Lulu,” Ozzie says softly as he continues to stroke his hair, “We’re not going anywhere, baby.” 

The kind words push Lucifer to his limit and he breaks down completely. It has been a lonely two years, he hasn’t seen Charlie since their fight in the garden and became too ashamed to try to reach out to her. Why would she want to talk to him anyway? They don’t have the strongest foundation due to Lilith wanting to raise their daughter on her own, and despite how much it hurt, he wanted to respect his queen’s wishes. It didn’t help that one of the few precious times Charlie did reach out to him, he lashed out and made her think he didn’t care about her mother. He hadn’t meant to lose his temper like that, but hearing how those lowly sinners dared to attack his little girl, his protective instincts kicked into overdrive and he ended up pushing her away instead. He didn’t even get the chance to hear her idea she was so excited about, excited enough to want his help. 

The rejection, the loneliness, the embarrassment are all too much for the King of Hell to handle and he continues to cry with Asmodeus and Beelzebub holding him through his panic attack. He can’t remember when the tears finally stopped nor can he remember falling asleep, or at least he thinks he did, given that he wakes up on a sea of soft wool in a dark room lit with floating purple candles. Lucifer lifts his head and looks around confused, ‘Wool?’ A deep inhale of breath lifts the small king’s body up before settling back down. The calming scent of lavender fills the room and makes him instantly drowsy, his head falls back down onto the pillowy surface, his eyes close against his will. “Belphegor?” Lucifer mumbles as he fights to stay awake, “What…am I…doing… here…” His groggy voice trails off as her soft wool cradles him snuggly, the beat of the Sin of Sloth’s heart provides a soothing rhythm to send Lucifer back into a much needed, dreamless sleep. 

The giant lamb raises her head to look at the sleeping angel before lowering her head back onto her crossed hooves and closing her eyes, she waits until she hears soft snoring on her back before allowing herself to slip back to sleep, “Sleep little angel, you are safe.”

Chapter 30: A Clever R(oo)use

Summary:

The lengths a child will go for their mother, even dealing with evil itself. The lengths a mother will go to protect her child, even willing to work with evil incarnate. And for some, their hubris gets them tangled with.... You guessed it, evil itself.

Notes:

I wracked my brain on this chapter, I'm super excited to introduce new players into the story. I might post twice a week pretty soon. I'm cranking out chapters like nobody's business and I'm having a lot of fun with this story. I hope y'all are too!

Date: August 01, 2018

Age: Oooooooolllldddd like one the OG’s

Location: On the dirty streets of Pentagram City

Weather: Hot, muggy, sticky, ugh.

Current Conditions: Doing some girlboss shit, mind your business.

 

‘That red fucker is harder to track down than I anticipated’ Cain thinks to himself as he wipes the sweat off his brow, his shoulder-length, chestnut hair is tied into a messy bun to keep off his neck. He elbows an imp couple apart as he makes his way to a run-down bar, shooting them a dirty look that shuts them up before they can protest. They stare in shock which makes him angrier, ‘What, never seen a human before?’ A low snarl sends the couple on their way in a hurry. He doesn’t have the time or patience for any distractions, he’s on edge enough already. ‘He better show if he knows what’s good for him.’ Arriving at his destination, he takes the red neckerchief around his neck and gives his stubbled face a once over before stepping in. 

The air is hazy with smoke and an indistinguishable rock ballad plays in the background.  There are a few patrons arguing over a game of billiards in the far side of the bar, not that that’s any of Cain’s concern right now. Peanut shells crunch underneath his black rider boots as he makes a bee line to the darkest corner booth. 

In the shadows, blood-red stiletto nails tap the back of the seat to the beat of the rock ballad while the other hand holds a glass filled with pomegranate bourbon, lazily swirling the liquid around. Swirling jet-black hair sits underneath a wide, red-trimmed fedora that conceals the patron’s face as Cain slides into the booth. 

The fingers stop tapping at the same time a sip is taken from the glass, “Innit a bit rude to sit down uninvited?” A sultry voice teases, “I thought I raised you better than that.” Cain’s nostrils flare in anger, but he says nothing. A chuckle passes under the large hat, “Aw, I love when your wittle nose does that, makes you look just like your father.” Cain wants to lunge across the table and strangle the smugness right out of the woman, but again, he holds fast and remains silent. 

Roo lifts her head to look at Cain, “Yeesh, lighten up kiddo, you’ll get your second death with all that anger in your system.” She takes a swig of bourbon, lightly smacking her black, glossy lips and inspecting the glass, “I mean look at your brother, put him in an early grave, your anger I mean.” She cruelly laughs, carrying on much longer than necessary. Wiping a tear off her gray skin, Roo looks at him again, and studies his features. The shaggy, brown hair, the golden eyes, the same fuckin’ stubbled chin, god, he looks just like his daddy, and she fucking hates it. How long had it been since she called on Cain to do a task for her? Two, maybe 300 years? Not that it mattered, if Cain wanted to see her ‘better’ side for even five minutes, he always showed up when she called, the simpering whelp. “Did you give him my message?” She asks while pretending to inspect her nails.

Glowering, Cain answers curtly, “Yes, he’ll be there at midnight like you asked.”

“You used the disguise I said to?” Roo twirls her glass again.

“Yes.” Cain’s patience quickly wears thin, his temper ready to erupt at any given moment. “He expects to meet her in the mansion gardens at midnight!” Already done talking to Roo, he slams his burly fist on the table, “Now let me talk to my mother!” The original sinner cuts her eyes sharply at him as red eyes appear in her swirling, dark hair.

“Watch your tone with me, kid .” She warns darkly, “I can make it so that bitch never sees the light of any day ever. Again .” Cain grinds his teeth in fury and looks away, his whole body trembles with rage before pushing it all down, for her sake. Roo watches and has to bite back a snort, ‘What’s left of her anyway.’

“I… am sorry.” He grits out, swallowing all his pride, “Please, may I speak with her?” 

A smug grin cuts across Roo’s face, “Now that’s more like it,” She drinks in the man’s bloodlust for her. Antagonizing him like this always hits the spot, “Fine, here’s the little bitch, but remember the rule: No. Touching.” Black and red flames engulf Roo’s form, sparkling hazel eyes and dazzling blonde hair spring forth as Eve’s fair face takes the place of her counterpart. A gown made of gardenias, hydrangeas, daffodils, and carnations cover her plump curves as she blinks and looks around, confused by her surroundings. 

“Mama?” Cain tentatively calls out. 

Eve blinks her eyes into focus before they widen and sparkle with joy, “Hello, my baby boy.” Her voice sounds like a lullaby as she smiles warmly at him. Tears immediately fill Cain’s golden eyes, threatening to overflow down onto his tan face. 

“H-Hi, Mama!” Cain fights to keep his voice steady, “How are you today?”

“I’m doing perfect now that I see my sweetheart.” Eve smiles warmly as she begins to reach for Cain’s hand, but he pulls back and puts them in his lap. His mother looks at him, confused by his actions. He gives an apologetic smile.

“Sorry Mama, I’m really dirty from the field, don’t wanna get you messy, do we?” Cain asks gently, fighting to keep tears from falling.

Eve giggles, “God made dirt and dirt don’t hurt!”

Cain wants so badly to hold his mother, even for just a brief moment. But there’s no telling when Roo will let them see each other again if they broke the rule. Cain isn’t sure if Roo would let him see her again and he isn’t willing to risk it. Not after that severe 'punishment/ she gave him after accidentally brushing her arm that one time. His ribs begin to ache at the memory, Roo’s cruel laughter as she beat him echoes in his ear. Cain shakes his head clear, ‘Focus on mom for right now.’   

Eve tilts her head in concern at her son’s expression, “Cain, what’s wrong, does something hurt?” She asks gently, her small hand reaches for him again. He leans away.

“Just a sunburn, Mama, nothing bad.” Cain lies. It’s not like he can tell her what’s really wrong, it wouldn’t matter anyway, given the state of her memory. At least this time around, she thinks Abel is still alive and well.

Eve frowns, her pink lips jut out in a pout, “I know when you are telling me stories, young man.” She scolds, “You and your brothers have never been able to get a make-believe over on me!”  Her curved nose sniffs as she points it up proudly, “A mother always knows.”

Watching her pulls a genuine smile out of Cain, he lets out a light chuckle, “Yes, ma’am. Never can get anything past you.” He looks at her hands, yearning to hold them. Seeing his mother in front of him sends a fresh wave of sadness through Cain. To him, this was his true punishment for his sins, not his exile. To be just out of reach from the one who loved him in spite of his flaws, the only one to ever forgive him. This truly was Hell. 

The mother and son spend their few precious minutes catching up on life. Eve tells Cain about the day she thinks she’s having and what she plans to make for dinner for her precious boys. She laughs as she describes how one of Abel’s goats got into the house again and scared Adam during a nap. Her son smiles sadly, remembers that day, Cain and Seth set the goat loose in the house. As their time draws near, Cain gives his mother a determined look and places his hand as close to hers as possible.

“Mama, I know you don’t understand right now, but I’m going to free you from this” He promises. 

Eve laughs confused, “There is nothing to free me from, baby, it’s just a little goat. The poor thing can’t cause any real harm.” She smiles warmly at him, “I just want you boys to live your lives for yourself. Don’t worry about me, I have your father and we love each other so much.” Her hand hovers over his, it is so much smaller in comparison. ‘So close…’ “You’re such a good son, Cain.” She says gently, her light voice begins to fade. "May sweet, gentle boy."

“No, Mama, wa-” His gruff voice cracks with desperation.

“I love y-” Red and black flames engulf her gentle form as Roo takes back over, stretching out a crick in her neck. 

“Ugh, goddamn, I dunno how that bitch does that for so damn long.” Her blood-red eyes are squeezed shut as she rolls her shoulder and massages her neck pain, “10 minutes gave me such a cramp, I can’t believe she’s been doing that for centuries. Pfft. Not like she has much of a choice in the matter.” Roo cracks an eye open to see the devastation on Cain’s face, she sneers. “Aaaawww, does baby boy miss Mama , alweady?” She cackles loudly before polishing off her drink. The glass slams on the table as she sloppily wipes her mouth on the sleeve of her black and red-trimmed coat. She stands up and straightens her fedora as she glances over her shoulder, “Be a good boy and pay Mama’s tab, won’t you, dear?” 

Cain doesn’t move or respond. Smiling, Roo bends down and roughly pinches his cheek between her sharp nails, “Okay snookums, mommy’s going away on business, but she wuvs her wittle, gentle boy sooooo much!” She mocks loudly in his ear before laying a fat, wet kiss on his forehead, “Remember to bwush your teefies and be in beddy-bye by 9!” Another cackling spell takes over as she shoves his face away and struts out of the bar. Cain sits there and stares blankly at the table, he jumps as a fifth of whiskey is placed in front of him. The lavender-colored ferret waitress gives him a gentle smile, “Ash says the next few are on the house.” Then walks away. The scorpion bartender spares him a curt nod when Cain looks his way. Raising his glass to acknowledge and thank him, Cain downs the glass in one gulp, he’s gonna need a few after that encounter.

____________

30 minutes ‘til midnight in the Queen’s Garden

Lilith walks past her black roses and gingerly grazes her gloved fingertips on the soft petals. Her mind replays with her evening with Charlie, those bright eyes shining up at her as the two sing duet after duet. Dancing hand-in-hand around the music room as the staff laughs and plays music for them all evening. Her precious daughter, falling asleep in her lap as she retells Charlie’s favorite story of how her and her father meeting and falling in love. 

Charlie’s father, her husband. Her darling husband, the love of her life, the one who encouraged her to break free from Adam and live her life how she saw fit. The angel who sacrificed everything in the name of freedom and love, who never tried to tie her down or control her. Silver eyes flutter close as she tries to push the past few years away. The fights, shutting him out, keeping Charlie away from him, the false anger, leaving him alone and broken. ‘You can’t stop now, they need to believe that you don’t love him anymore, that you hate him!’ She reminds herself as she fidgets with her ring, the ring that’s no longer there. Lifting her hand, Lilith can’t help but heave a heavy sigh at the absence of the sacred jewelry. She brings her hand to her lips and gives her ring finger a gentle kiss, ‘I do this all for you, my loves.’  

“Ugh, I still can’t get over how mushy you are for him after all this time.” Roo drawls as she approaches the first woman. “Better get it all out of your system now if you want to convince Nutsack upstairs to let you on the shores.”

“I know my role,” Lilith hisses harshly, “You just keep your side of the plan and watch over my family!”

Roo rolls her eyes, “Yeah, yeah nothing gonna happen to your cuckold and brat. Just convince Stupid that you want to take down Lucifer and the Sins so that Heaven can officially rule Hell. Once we have an in, you, me and all of Hell take down Heaven from within, no more exterminations.” 

Lilith looks to her bedroom window, where Charlie sleeps soundly, dreaming of music and rainbows. Her heart tightens, “I love you, Charlie.” she whispers to herself. A bright portal opens up in the garden courtyard and Roo ducks out of the way before the holy light can touch her dark form. Backing up to the portal, Lilith spares the window one final glance before disappearing. 

Roo grins darkly and twiddles her fingers, “Have fun Queenie-poo,” She sings-songs as she places Lilith's signature pearl necklace around her neck. Purple flames swirl around her as her swirling black hair is replaced by floor- length golden locks. Maroon ram horns sprout from the top of her head as she feels her arms and legs stretch to length. Her red eyes shine silver under the red moonlight. Roo looks at her new form and twirls, “Mmmm, still missing something…” snapping her fingers, a gorgeous violet gown wraps around her tall frame. “Much better, gotta say Lilith, the Big guy upstairs really thought highly of you.” She laughs as she bounces her large bust. “And for the final touch.” She douses herself in a thick perfume, “This will lower the guard of any demon. Now, we wait for our pawn.”

10 minutes later, an inky pool of shadows appear before her as a red-clad demon steps out of the shadows. Sharp, yellow teeth gleam in a grotesque, off-putting smile as a microphone cane is twirled around before being placed behind a slim waist. “Good evening, Your Majesty!” The Radio-Demon bows deeply before the perceived queen, “My name is Alastor, pleasure to be meeting you, quite a pleasure!” He takes her gloved hand and places a gentle kiss, inhaling her sweet perfume. His mouth waters at the scent, “To what do I owe the honor of having a private audience with the Queen of Hell, herself?” 

Plump, black lips pull into a serene smile, “My dear, Radio-Demon, the strongest of sinners, I fear I must ask for your help.” Alastor straightens up, his smile sinister.

Oh, this will be fun. 

Notes:

People! We have deception! I repeat we have deception. How will our beloved Radio Demon, handle our big baddie?

Chapter 31: The Bare Minimum

Summary:

The Knight siblings perform their annual ritual of sacrificing their young to the Greemlins of Win-tah. Afterwards, an unexpectant and quite frankly unwelcomed visitor stops by Queen's house.

Notes:

Hey yall, I'm starting to upload twice a week until I'm unable to.

Date: December 30, 2021

Age: 42 years old

Location: Greensboro, NC

Weather: Cold and snowy, great for pickin’ fights 

Current Conditions: Showing college-age siblings that the older siblings always win in a snowball fight

 

“CHA-CHA! DO SOMETHING!’ Matthias shouts as Elijah drags him by his foot away from his snow fort. His blue hoodie is dragged up along with his undershirt, exposing his torso to the frosty elements. “COLD, COLD!” The youngest brother shrieks as he tries to gain any purchase on snow covered ground.

“I’LL HONOR YOUR MEMORY, BROTHER!” Harmony shouts back as her three older sisters close in on all sides, each armed with large snowballs and wicked grins. Turning her face to the sky, Harmony cries out, “I AIN’T GOING DOWN WITHOUT A CRASHOUT!” and blindly flings her horde of snowballs in every which direction. The action saves her a little bit of time before Dezzi, Aura, and Queen descend upon her. “NOOOOOOO!” Harmony wails dramatically, letting her body go boneless. Aura and Dezzi grab her torso and legs then follow Queen to where Elijah sits on Matthias’ back pinning him in the snow.

“VICTOOOOORRRYYY,” Elijah bellows in a silly voice, “SISTAHS! PREPAAARREE THE SACRIFICES!” The girls tilt their heads to the sky and let out a ridiculous battle cry, very similar to Spongebob Squarepants. Harmony and Matthias join in the foolishness when Elijah tosses snow in Matthias’ face. “SILENCE TRIBUTES!” His deep voice cracks and sends everyone into a laughing fit. 

The adults bring the youngest two to a snow bank with their hands held behind their backs. Queen walks up to it with Dezzi in tow, the younger sister blowing a pretend trumpet with raspberries. Clearing her throat in an overtly goofy manner, Queen speaks, “Oh, Greemlins of Win-tah, the harvest has been bountiful and the snow days many! We give these yoo-ths as thanks and tribute, so that the icy cold doth not freeze our nips, in thy mercy!”

“IN THY MERCY!” Elijah, Dezzi and Aura echo, sending Harmony and Matthias into a fresh fit of giggles.

“We ask in return for a happy new year and many, many more snow days! In thy mercy.” Queen continues in her silly accent.

“IN THY MERCY!” The siblings echo again, the youngest two grow weak with laughter.

“Aaaaan- duh! For all… THE HOT CHOCOLATEYS!!” Queen finishes her speech with a voice crack of her own, “BRING FORTH THE FIRST SACRIFICE!”

Dezzi and Elijah pick up Matthias and swing him back and forth before releasing him to land softly in the snow bank. Powder snow puffs up around his deep indent with only his laugh ringing out. 

“BRING FORTH…THE SECOND…SACRIFICE!” Queen declares as she tries and fails to keep a grin off her beautiful face. She and Aura lift their baby sister and toss her beside Matthias in the snow, cracking up as snow flares up again. 

Dezzi claps her mittened hands together twice, “TIS DONE! RAVIOLI, RAVIOLI PLEASE ACCEPT THE SACRIFOLIES!!” Everyone descends into a fit of laughter as their annual game comes to an end. Helping the two youngest out of the snow, the family heads to the cars to go back to Queen’s house.

Evening falls as the Knights debate what movie to watch when their pizza arrives. The boys want to watch a holiday slasher while Dezzi and Harmony argue for a rom-com. Queen and Aura battle for a chick flick when the doorbell rings, “Well that was fast.” Queen mutters as she goes to answer the door, “I’m the oldest and I say we watch The Devil-” Her sentence is cut off as she stares her father dead in the eyes, “-Is a lie. Indeed he is, the Devil is a damn lie.” She finishes flatly as she steps out and closes the door behind her. Crossing her arms, a firm look sets on her face, “Dad?” She asks after a bout of silence.

Charles shifts uncomfortably from one foot to the other, the cold messing with his old joints. He shoves his gloved hands into the satin-lined pockets of his dark blue wool coat, and clears his throat, “Hey Queen, sorry for the sudden appearance, didn’t know you had the others over.” His deep voice puffs out steam as his breath meets the cold air. Queen gives no expression as she waits to hear what he wants. Sniffing sharply, Charles continues, “Listen, I don’t want to keep you long, I was in town and just wanted to see if you were doing alright…” He looks down at his black Brogue shoes as he shuffles them, “And to…” The older man trails off.

Queen suppresses a sigh before asking patiently, “And to what, Dad?”

Charles clears his throat again and sniffles, “And to see if we could sit down for a coffee sometime.” Queen’s eyebrows raises in surprise, this was not what she expected coming from her estranged father.

“Coffee?” She asks as she tucks her fuzzy, peach cardigan around her tall, curvy frame before crossing her arms again to keep warm.

“Yeah, just you and me, fifteen minutes.” Charles clarifies as his shoulders raise up to his ears. “This Thursday, at 11:00?” He asks hopefully, searching for any reaction on his daughter’s face. Queen studies his face, his forehead has hardlines peeking out from under his black beanie, more gray is speckled his stubble than before, his strong jawline looks thinner, more frail. Taking in a deep breath and exhaling slowly, she finally nods.

“Okay, this Thursday, 11:00.” She finally agrees as she watches the tension lift off his broad shoulders.

“Thanks, I’ll…I’ll see you around, sweetie.” Charles fights off a grimace at the awkward pet name. He turns and steps off the porch before looking over his shoulder, “I love you.”

Queen’s chest clenches painfully at the words, she nods meekly, “Yeah, me too, Dad.” She mumbles quietly, unable to look him in the eye. The older man pauses and nods slowly before walking away. Queen re-enters her house and leans against the door, her head reeling at seeing her dad again after almost two years. 

“Queenie?” Harmony asks as she walks up to her sister, “Is everything okay?” 

Queen shakes off the cold and pulls her baby sister into a tight bear hug, planting a kiss on her cheek, “I’m okay Cha-Cha Slide, just confirming a small meeting with an old acquaintance, did they pick a movie yet?” The two stay embraced and penguin-waddle back to the couch.

“We’re gonna watch Who Framed Roger Rabbit? it’s Sojo’s favorite.” Harmony explains as she settles into her sister’s lap. Queen lets out an exasperated oof!  

“You too big to be sitting in my lap, college girl!” She wheezes and pokes Harmony’s sides to tickle her.

Harmony turns her button nose up in the air, “Nonsense, I’m the baby, I fit perfectly.” She retorts, hugging around her sister’s neck and pressing her face into Queen’s. Queen rolls her eyes and smiles, it’s been a while since all her siblings were together like this, might as well indulge them. A few minutes pass, when the doorbell rings and Aura gets up to answer with money in hand to pay for the pizzas. Matthias clears the coffee table to make space for the food as Dezzi grabs paper plates and plastic cups. 

Aura returns with two soda bottles and three stacked boxes with the money sitting on top of them. Elijah walks over and takes the soda bottles from his wife when he notices the cash. “What’s the money still doing here?” He asks.

“They said the food was already paid for.” Aura answers as places the pizza on the table, “Tip and everything.”

Elijah raises an eyebrow in surprise, “Did they deliver to the right address?” He checks the pizzas, confirming the toppings, “The pizzas are right, what the hell?” Aura ties her blonde hair into a messy bun and shrugs her shoulders.

“Couldn’t tell ya, babe.” She accepts a plate from Dezzi and grabs a slice of mushroom and pepperoni, “Perhaps a gift from the Greemlins of Win-tah?”

“GREEMLINS OF WIN-TAH!” Everyone shouts in unison and claps their hands once, before settling down and turning on the movie. Queen tries to focus on the film, but her mind keeps going back to her conversation with Charles. The meeting plagues her mind and distracts her even through New Year’s Eve as she tries to celebrate with her siblings and friends. 

Finally, Thursday arrives and Queen excuses herself from Dezzi who was staying for the rest of the week. Arriving at the cafe, She unwraps her plaid, fleece scarf from around her neck, wincing as it snags on one of her dangling earrings. Freeing it, she undoes the black buttons of her cream-colored princess coat before shrugging it off to hang on the coat rack. Her tan faux fur-lined gloves are tucked into her sea-green bindle style purse as she scans the tables inside, her deep brown eyes landing on her dad. 

Charles is wearing a dark burgundy pull-over sweater with a zipper that stops midway, exposing his white button-up. Dark wash straight leg jeans are secured in place by a warm- brown leather belt with a cell phone clip holstered on his waist, his black leather square-toe boots have traces of salt from outside on the soles. Charles notices his daughter and stands up to greet her, he leans in and the two place small kisses on each other’s cheek. A waitress stops by and takes their order, leaving them to their conversation. They start with idle small chat, with numerous awkward pauses at the slightest break. The waitress serves them their order, giving them a much-needed break from talking, it has only been five minutes since they sat down. Queen adds sugar and cream to her coffee and focuses on her stirring while Charles takes a bite of his spinach and tomato frittata and chews slowly.

Swallowing his bite, Charles picks at his food before clearing his throat to speak, “Queen, I understand we haven’t had the best relationship before, and it has only gotten worse since…that accident.” He glances at the scar on her jawline before his eyes dart away. Queen’s jaw tightens, her body goes stiff at the mere mention of that day and forces her hand from touching her scar out of reflex, “And I understand these past two years have been difficult for… for all of us since Sojourner di- passed.” He feels the sting of tears as they threaten to form, he quickly blinks before continuing. “The last time we spoke, it wasn’t good for any of us. Xenia and I should have called before coming over unannounced, but we were so hurt hearing about Sojo.” Queen’s eyes slide close as her patience quickly wears thin, Charles notices and rushes his words, “I want to start over, with all of you.”

Queen stares at her father and takes in his request, “Dad, I-” Her eyes trail down to his hands and notices his missing wedding ring, “You and Xenia split?” The older man folds his hands together tightly and sighs.

“We’re… we’re separated.” He confesses sadly, “We couldn’t come to an agreement and had a bad argument, we both said things that were wrong.”

“You couldn’t agree on what?” Queen presses as she takes a sip of her beverage.

Charles’ eyes go distant as he remembers the fight vividly, he and his wife at either end of the staircase screaming offences at each other before Xenia throws her rings down at his chest before slamming the door to their bedroom. “I wanted to sell and move down here to be closer to all of you. Xenia wants to stay up north because of her business and contacts.”

Queen’s face narrows into a scowl, “Don’t all her ‘businesses’ fail anyway? Usually with people investing in them and then never seeing a return of profit, ever?” 

Charles raises his hand in defense and shakes his head, “I try to stay out of whatever she does.”

“What she does, is con people” Queen grumbles, “And you know it.”

Charles shies away from the accusation and quickly changes topics. “Well, I’m leaving her to her own devices while I’m in North Carolina to scope out houses. Don’t worry, I’m not choosing anywhere in Greensboro, maybe somewhere in Chapel Hill or Raleigh. I just want to be closer to you kids, and I want you to be the first to know.” He takes a bite of food and looks away.

“You want me to pitch this to the rest of my siblings and sell them on it?” Queen’s voice has a bite to it, angry at the thought of being used.

“No, no! I’m telling everyone myself!” He diffuses as he almost chokes on his food. “I’m telling you first, because you’re the oldest, Queen.” Charles takes a sip of his tea to wash down the food. “I tried texting all of you, but my messages weren’t getting through.”

“That's because we blocked you and Xenia.” Queen bluntly explains, taking a sip of her coffee. “After you two showed up unannounced at Elijah’s house, we all sat down together and made a unanimous decision.” She glances up from her cup and catches the expression on Charles’ face. The downtrodden expression almost makes her apologize instantly, but she stops herself. Sighing, she sets down her cup, “I’ll…I’ll let them know that you want to sit down with them. I’m not going to encourage or discourage anyone, if they agree to see you then that’s their decision alone, I’ll support them either way.”

Charles releases his held breath and brightens up a little, “Thank you Queen. You have no idea how much this means to-”

“I am absolutely not doing this for you.” She interrupts, “If my siblings want to pursue their own individual relationship with you, then that’s their choice. I’m simply passing on the offer.” She polishes off the rest of her coffee and places a $20 down, “Do not go up to them, if they want to see you, they will reach out to you. Do not disturb their peace, Charles. Do you understand me?” Charles nods solemnly as she grabs her purse and stands up, “Do not make me regret this.” She states darkly as she turns to walk away.

Charles quickly stands, his chair scoots back loudly disturbing the calm atmosphere of the cafe. “Queen, wait!” He reaches for her, but catches himself. 

Queen stops in her tracks, “Yes?” She does not turn around.

“Can I please see you again before I go? I’ll be in town for the following week while I wait to hear from the others.”

Queen takes a deep breath before answering, “I’ll think about it, okay?” she sighs and pulls her gloves out of her bag. “I’ll let you know.” She says quietly before grabbing her coat and walking out. Charles watches as she climbs into her white RAV 4 and pulls out of the parking lot. He slumps back down in his seat and stares at his half-eaten frittata, instantly losing his appetite. Suddenly his phone buzzes and he picks it up to see a text notification from Queen. He opens up the message and smiles.

Thanks for the pizzas btw, love you.  

Notes:

Oof, well, that was awkward. What will Queen and her younger siblings do? It's difficult to go no-contact and even more difficult to go limited contact.

Chapter 32: My Busy Valentine

Summary:

Eggy prepares for the biggest day of the year when mousse hits the fan. In times of trouble, it's nice to know there are people she can rely on.

Notes:

I'm upsetti spaghetti right now. I just found out that a dental problem, I've been complaining about for YEARS and gaslit into nonaction is actually a huge funkin' deal. Like my front tooth has a 3/4 crack in it bad. "Oh, you shouldn't feel anything bc you had 3 root canals on it. Dur hurr I'm a dentist. Oh, wait there's a problem, nevermind.

I hate it here sometimes

Date: February 13, 2022 around 0330 or 3:30 am for normal people

Age: 3 ½ years dead

Location: Good as Hell Bakery

Weather: Stupid, why the funk is it cold?! It’s Hell!!

Current Conditions: Things are getting sticky, like literally.

 

Ding! The pastry oven brightly chimes as it finishes baking fresh eclairs, the whole kitchen wafts an alluring scent of blended cocoa and sugar in the air. The owner and head pastry chef, Eggy, morphs her fondant hands into oven mitts and retrieves her creations from the oven, bumping the large door closed with her elbow.

Her purple royal icing lips curve into a satisfied smile when she takes a deep whiff of the delicious eclairs. “These are gonna go gangbustah!” She exclaims with her thick Jersey accent, “Oh, Egberta Solano, how you’ve outdone yaself, baby!” 

The self-praises continue as she places the eclairs on the cooling rack before putting the next set of unbaked treats inside the oven. She approaches her freshly iced, three-tiered Red Velvet cake and picks up her piping bag to add decorations while she waits, her nasally voice sings out an out of tune rendition of Frank Sin-atra’s “Luck be a Lady”. 

It had been a rough year for Eggy, the last extermination leveled her bakery and she had to spend all her savings into getting a more secure location and replacement equipment. Holidays like Valentine’s Day are what really can decide whether she can afford to keep her lights on in both her home and her bakery, and she has high hopes for tomorrow. She has been trying and testing new recipes all winter to see what flavours were most popular with the masses. Once she had her consensus, she spent all week prepping the treats to be sold on the big day, keeping them chilled in her walk-in fridge.

Her famous white chocolate raspberry and almond fudge took up three of the 12 four foot long shelves in there while a hundred fruit custard tarts lined an entire wall. These two desserts are what is going to bring the cash in, Eggy sells out of them everytime she makes them, even when she ups the price each time. Now, with this Valentine’s Day special edition building up buzz in the bakery all week, she’ll be sitting comfortably for the next- WHHHHHIIIRRRRRRR…. thwoomp! The sound of a large fan dies down with a drawn out hiiiiisssssssssss…

Eggy is frozen in place as she stares at her fridge, “What the hell?” POP! The oven sharply rings out as smoke begins to pour out from behind, “Oh no. No, NO!” She throws her piping bag down and runs to unplug the industrial oven before it can catch fire. As she yanks out the cord, she sees a black lightning scorch starting from the outlet, leading all the way to the top right corner of the door of the walk-in, right where the cooling fan sits. Eggy pink fondant skin turns a sickly blue as her Peep marshmallow chef hat deflates, the reality sets in immediately. Her kitchen just died, the day before Valentine’s Day. “Oh gah- dammit, I need ta call Honey Bear.”

__________

0357, Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electric Repair- Apartment

 

Lollipop, lollipop, oh lolly, lolly, lolly. Lollipop, lollipop, oh lolly, loll-

Ahem, sniff! “Tr-trick or treat.” Sojourner sleepily answers as she lifts her upside down cell phone up to her ear. 

“Oh, thank Lucifer! Honey Bear, it’s Eggy, I have an emergency! I-” Eggy’s voice sounds small and far away.

Sojo squints at her phone’s flipped screen before placing it back against her ear, smushing her face against her satin pillow, “Ms. Pac-man? I can’t understand you, too many dots…zzzz.” Sojourner’s eyes slip close as she drifts off to sleep again, holding her phone to her face.

“Honey Bear? Sojournah!” Eggy shouts into the phone, putting the phone on speaker. Soft snores are heard on the other line, “Sonuva…” She curses as she hangs up and calls again.

Lollipop, lollipop, oh lolly-

Sojourner jolts up with a sharp yelp as the phone rings directly into her ear before falling into her lap. Fumbling for a moment, the sleepy bear answers the phone, “Hello?” she groans.

“Sojo, baby, my sweetest kiss of chocolate! I need ya help!” Eggy rambles frantically, the sound of thin metal clanks in the background.

“Santa?” Sojourner asks, confused as she rubs the sleep out of her eyes.

“What the shit? No, sweetie, it’s me, Eggy. Y’know, ya friend, I run a bakery?” Eggy inquires, hoping to wake Sojourner up.

“Oh, congratulations. I’m not hungry, please.” Sojourner groggily answers, her posture begins to slump as mismatched eyes get heavy again.

“SOJO, WAKE UP! I NEED YA!” Eggy shouts, successfully shocking Sojourner awake. 

The sudden shout makes the sailor jump and open her eyes fully. Squinting again at the screen, Sojourner flips her phone right side-up and places it to her ear, “Eggy, did I call you in my sleep?” She yawns and stretches her arms over her head, pinching the phone between her shoulder and ear. 

“No, doll. Listen, I am so, so sorry about the early wake-up call, but I need ya help, sugah!” Eggy scrambles to put all of her confectionary creations into the fridge without losing the cold temperature. “Both my fridge and my oven just went kaput, and I’ve got about 20 hours worth of baking to do! Can you come and see if you can work ya magic?”

Sojourner flips on her bedside lamp and squints at the yellow light, even its dim setting is too bright at the moment. She leans over and rummages through her backpack on the floor and grabs her tablet, groaning at the sudden blinding light that is the homescreen. Going to her calendar, she scrolls to today and it's pretty busy, “Uuummmm, yeah, I can try to squeeze you in first thing today.”

“No honey, I mean now! There is a time limit on these desserts, I planned it out perfectly.” Eggy explains, the urgency in her voice is heavy.

“Wait, you want me to come now, now?” Sojourner asks, incredulously. “Eggy, it’s 4 in the goddamn morning!”

“Sweetheart, I wouldn’t be callin’ if this wasn’t for sure an emergency! Please, Baby Doll, I’m beggin’ ya!” The chef pleads. “No one else can fix things like you can, please !” Her voice breaks on the last word.

Sojourner cycles a deep breath and mulls it over, ‘It’s probably not a big deal, just go over and reset a breaker or something’ Heaving a sigh, she answers, “Alright Eggs, I’m on my way.”

A sob escapes out of the living confection, “Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you! The back door to the kitchen will be open, just let yaself in!” Eggy instructs, “I’ll see ya soon!”

“Mm-hmm” Sojourner hums before hanging up and tossing the covers back. The cool air hits her body, but it doesn’t really bother her. “Thank Lucifer for this thick-ass fur.” She mumbles as she stands and stretches, gagging when her neck and shoulders pop. To this day, Sojo thinks it’s a cruel joke that popping any joint, including her own, makes her dry heave. She pulls on a fresh pair of coveralls over her tan work shirt and pink leggings before pulling on her tan steel toed boots. She yawns again as she walks to the bathroom to freshen up, pulling her multi-colored braids into a neat bun at the base of her neck.

Once she's dressed, Sojourner heads down into the kitchen to grab her green splatter tumbler from the cupboard and flips on the electric kettle for her tea. Letting out a big yawn, she grabs her lunch bag and fills it with her premade food for the day. Hot Mic is woken out of his sleep as she clips him onto her waist before starting the van to warm it up. 

Gunny’s pointed ears twitch when he hears the van turn over. He grabs his cracked phone and squints at the time 0423, ‘The fuck is she doing up at this hour?’. Rubbing the sleep out of his green eyes, the marine lets out a big yawn before his head shimmies involuntarily. Padded feet thump down the stairs as Sojourner returns from the garage to prepare her tea. Grabbing her black South Fang liner and pulling it on, she hears her roommate walk down the stairs.

“Oh, hey Che- JESUZ TAP DANCING CHRIST!” She shrieks and skids to a halt. Her mismatched eyes grow to the size of saucers as her mouth falls open in a silent scream, hands fly to cover her eyes. 

Heavy eyebrows furrow in confusion at her reaction, “The hell’s wrong with you?” Gunny's voice is deep and gravely with sleep. Sojourner quickly turns away and shields her face, a long wheeze rips from her chest. “Sojo, the fuck?” He asks, placing his hands on his hips.

“You… y-your…” She stammers, her shoulder bunch up next to her face, “Down boy!” She orders and waves her hand at him, not looking at him.

‘Down boy?’ “What the hell’re ya talkin’ ‘bout, gal?” Gunny asks and walks towards her.

“Put Jabba back in his hut!” Sojourner’s voice raises a full octave and clenches her shaking fists. 

“Who the fuck is Jab-” His eyes cast down to the floor and stops mid sentence, “O-oh…” Heat explodes across his face. An awkward silence falls between them as Gunny scrambles to snatch a pillow from his armchair and places it in front of his hips, concealing the large tent in his plaid, green boxers. The electric kettle kicks off as the water boils and steam pours out the spout.

With her eyes still shielded, Sojourner crosses the lounge, pours her tea and grabs her lunch bag. Turning off the kitchen light, she marches quickly across the room and pauses at the garage door, refusing to make eye contact. “I’m heading to Eggy’s, I’ll text you, bye!” She rambles out before hastily exiting, opening the garage door to pull out the van.

“...DON’T ACT LIKE YER NOT IMPRESSED!” Gunny calls out before walking back upstairs. 

_______________________

0448, Good as Hell Bakery

 

Sojourner pulls into the alley behind the bakery and arms the van before opening the door to the kitchen. The acidic smell of burnt wires stings her nose as she steps in, definitely not a good sign. “Eggy?” She calls out as she walks into the heart of the kitchen, “Where are yo-oooooohhh….” Her sentence trails off when the black lightning streak comes into view. “Oooohh fuck me, dude.” She drawls, walking up to the wall and following the streak to the starting point. The outlet in question is charred black with bubbled, melted plastic obstructing the prong ports. “Yyyyikes!” Sojourner grimaces as she makes her way back over to the fridge.

She opens the heavy door, a cold burst of air hits her face as she leans over to peek in. The large metal fan has soot on its vents and the edge of the blades, frost has begun to build on the exterior. “Burnout, that sucks.” The electrician mumbles and closes the door, sealing it tight. Peeling off her jacket, Sojourner surveys the area before eyeing a closed door on the far left corner of the room, ‘Maybe that’s the maintenance door.’   She wonders and pulls the door open. The acrid stench sears her nose and makes her cough as she pulls on thick rubber gloves from Hot Mic and approaches the two fuse boxes. The one on the right that's labeled “Shop and Lights” is perfectly intact, while its twin has soot around the trim of its door. Sojourner opens the fuse panel, it’s a disaster. What wasn’t melted to the bottom of the box was bulging the control panel out of proportions, nothing was salvageable. “Damn.” Sojourner hisses to herself and shuts the panel’s main breaker off, securing the power. Taking a step back, she begins building a list of what she’ll need to begin repairs.

“Well Doc, how bad is it?” Sojourner jumps about a foot in the air as Eggy leans against the door frame, a worried look etched into her sugary face. 

“Girl, don’t scare me like that!” Sojourner scolds while holding her chest, her racing heart slams against her ribs as she tries to catch her breath. 

“Sorry, Sugar Smacks, thought ya heard me come in, guess you were thinkin’ deep.” Eggy apologizes. She glances around her friend at the damaged fuse panel, “Is it bad?” She asks, tentatively.

Sojourner looks back to the panel and sighs deeply, “I’ll be honest, hon, it’s pretty damn bad.” She points to the control box, “Something in the panel overheated and caused everything in the fuse box to melt. When it did that, it basically welded everything together and caused an overvoltage, thus frying your oven, fridge, and aaaaalll the wires in between.”

Eggy’s pink fondant turns a depressing blue, “But-but, it's a quick fix, right?” She asks, hopefully. Sojourner sucks her teeth then blows out a long draw of air, slowly shaking her head. Eggy presses her forehead to the frame and squeezes her eyes shut, this cannot be happening. Valentine's Day was supposed to be the game changer that would set her up for months, this will make her bakery go under! Simple syrup tear drops begin to fall from her eyes.

“Eggy?” Sojourner asks gently, reaching for her friend. “Eggy, don’t cry, it can be fixed.” She tries to soothe and lays her gloved hand on her shoulder.

“I’m going to lose my bakery!” Eggy cries and covers her face, “I can barely keep my shop open as is, and now I just lost my kitchen!” Her shoulders shake as sobs rack through her body. “Valentine’s Day was supposed to get me outta the hole!” She weeps.

“You’ll lose the bakery?” Green and Red eyes grow wide at the confession, “But I thought it was doing well.”

“That was my old bakery, the one that got DESTROOOOYYEED!” The pastry chef wails as cartoony water fountains erupt from her eyes, nearly spraying Sojourner and the fuse boxes.

“HEY! Yo, yo!” The sailor exclaims and pushes her friend out of the fuse closet, shutting the door with her foot, “Girl, you almost fried us ! ” Her warning falls on deaf ears as Eggy cries harder and harder, creating small pools of tears on each side of her. A deep frown sets onto the bear’s face as she rubs her neck, worried for her friend. ‘I don’t want her to lose this place.’  

A plan quickly forming into place, Sojourner grabs Eggy’s shoulders to turn her towards her. “Listen, does your upstairs oven work?” She asks as the chef blubbers uncontrollably, “EGGY!” Sojourner gives her friend a sharp shake, getting her attention, “Does your upstairs oven work?” Sniffing up a line of green gel snot, Eggy nods, her plump bottom lip jutting out. Sojourner fights back a gag at the snot before continuing, “Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do: You are going to bake what you can upstairs and continue to frost cakes. The fridge’s seal is still good, the temperature is still well within the safe food range and should last at least another 24 hours. Thankfully, it’s cold as tits outside, so that will give us more time.” 

Putting her gloves away, Sojourner grabs her jacket and pulls it on, “I’m gonna call my buddy and see if he can help you out. He has a paint shop about two streets away that used to be an old firehouse and has like three ovens.” She sends a text, “I gave him your number and asked to call you to let you know if he can help. If he can’t, shoot me a text and let me know.” Tucking her phone into a jacket pocket, she heads towards the door, “I’m gonna try to find some replacement parts and at least get the oven running, okay?” Eggy stares at Sojourner in awe, tears line her eyes but stop falling. “Your bakery is gonna be fine, lady, don’t cry!” The heavy door closes behind her as the van pulls away. Wiping her tears, the confectioner sniffles before getting to work.

Eggy grabs four small trays of pastries to move upstairs to her preheated oven when her phone buzzes. Placing the trays down, she answers the phone before opening the oven door, “Hello? Good as Hell Bakery.” 

“Hey, is this Eggy? Mámi said you needed some help with your food?” A Latino accent replies on the other end of the line.

“Mommy? I don’t know no Mommy.” Eggy asks as she slides the trays in and closes the oven door. The voice on the line laughs, it sounds nice.

“No, no, I meant Sojo! Sorry, Mámi is what I call her.” The speaker clarifies with a chuckle, “She said you have an emergency and could use some extra hands and …ovens?”

Red rock-candy eyes widen, “Oh shit! You’re her friend she talked about earlier!” She exclaims, “Yeah, hi honey, I’m Eggy, nice to meetcha!” 

“Hola, me llamo Toner.” The painter introduces himself, still chuckling. 

“Mmmm, he’s spicy, oh-la-la!” Eggy flirts as a smile grows on her face, “Well Tonah, I’m happy with whatever help ya got for me, I really appreciate it, honey!”

“Any friend of Mami’s is a friend of mine, Cocinera.” Toner answers, huskily. “My boys and I will be over soon, esperame.” Eggy’s candy heart speeds up, excited to meet him. This might be just what she needs.

________________

1226, The Junkyard- Industrial District 

 

“HA HA!” Huff! “I KNEW I’D FIND ONE!” Sojourner shouts in triumph as she pushes an abandoned industrial double oven out into the open. The trays are missing and the glass doors have been smashed out, the metal in the frame had been beaten all to hell, but that’s not what the little bear is after. She pushes it to fall face down on the ground, the back of the oven has shallow dents that creaked as she removed the screws that held the protective plate on.

“Please, please, pleeeeeaasse,” Sojourner prays as she pulls up the plate, “TITS, FUCK YES!” She cheers as the thermal couples and power supply are fully intact, “THAT’S HOW YOU FUCKIN’ DO IT!” Sojourner shouts as she strips the oven of its parts and makes the hard trek back to the van. A harsh wind kicks up as she climbs up the stairs, keys in hand to unlock the van when a red, horned, shirtless boar demon steps out from behind it. The gleam of his metal blade shines in the sunlight as the attacker takes a slow step towards her.

“Hey girly,” the demon leers, his voice scratches like tin foil, “Let’s make this easy, open the car then hand me the keys, and I won’t have to stick this knife into ya.” A sludgy line of drool drips down his chin, as he looks her up and down, “Mmmm, matter a fact, maybe I’ll just take ya with me, beautiful.” He licks his dry, cracked lips, “I like the way ya smell.” His crooked smile reveals a mess of rotten, jagged teeth. 

Sojourner takes a step back, holding her haul tightly to her chest, “Listen, I d-don’t want any t-t-trouble mister.” She whimpers and clicks the key fob, the lights on the van illuminate as it beeps, “Jus- just take the van and go!” Her green and red eyes widen as she curls in herself, trembling. 

The red boar chuckles, “How about you toss me them keys there?” He sneers, enjoying her fear, “And maybe, I’ll play nice.”

Sojourner sniffles, “Okay, okay, just please mister,” Her plump bottom lip juts out, “D-don’t hurt me.” She pleads and tosses the keys, the demon catches them in his hand. 

He cackles, “Oh baby, as long as you behave yerself,” He reaches for the door handle, “You ain’t got nothin’ to wo-” BZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTT!!! The van emits a shock that sends the sinner flying back 14 feet, his body now a dry, smouldering husk. Sojourner walks over and picks up the keys, breaking off the crispy hand in the process. She grimaces as she shakes it off and watches it crumble to pieces.

“Fuckin’ moron.” She scoffs unimpressed and walks back to her vehicle. She places the parts in one of the cubby organizers that line the wall before climbing into the front seat and driving off. Having successfully procured the needed parts for a temporary repair, Sojourner heads back to the Good as Hell Bakery . 

Grinning, she thinks about her day so far, Jackie had a spare fuse box in his inventory that he sold to her for a fraction of the price if she sat through another performance. It was a less pitchy rendition of Marvin Gaye’s ‘ Sexual Healing’ , and while his singing still makes her want to plunge an ice pick in her ear, the urge is slightly weaker now. 

A replacement power unit for the cooling fan was sold for 25% off when she visited Old Shit Antiques and was relatively new. It came from a company called V-Tech or something, not that she particularly cared, as long it held out long enough for Eggy to afford a brand new one. 

When Sojourner scoured every other hardware store in Pentagram City for a new oven power supply and thermal couples, the results were either the wrong model, unavailable, or way too expensive to justify a purchase. On the bright side however; she did manage to score five new customers on her search and two hardware store owners that were willing to give her a contractor’s discount after she explained what she needed the parts for.

Sojourner called Gunny earlier and begged him to open up the charred drywall in Eggy’s kitchen for her so she could get started right when she arrived. She apologized profusely for bothering him on his day off, especially when he had to take her jobs for the day. She was pleasantly surprised when he said it was ‘a quick job, no big deal, Squid.’ The electrician pulls up behind the bakery door and starts unloading the van of the needed parts. 

“Eggy?” Sojourner calls out, “I’m gonna get started on the fuse box!” Receiving no answer, she shoots her friend a quick text before getting to work. 

_________________

2209, Tone-Death Paint Shop

 

“Holy shit, I can’t believe we pulled it off!” Eggy wheezes as she wipes the icing on her apron, “We should be ready ta open tamarrow!” Toner walks up from behind and snakes a hand around the back of her thick waist, giving her a gentle squeeze. Eggy looks lovingly over her shoulder at the flaming skull as he flashes her a grin. 

“Good to go, Cocinerita?” He purrs, leaning in close to her sugary face.

“You know, Candlelight, I couldn’t have done this without you and ya boys.” The chef murmurs happily, her eyelids low, “I don’t know how I could eva repay ya, handsome.” She pushes her wide hips back into his waist.

Toner moans lowly at the contact, “I’ve got a mean sweet tooth, Querida.” He growls, “Maybe you make something hot and tasty for me?” His hips press back against her. 

“I’ll see what I can do for ya, Papi.” She laughs airily, leaning in for a kiss.

“Ugh, fuck, enough!” Gunny gags, holding the kitchen door open, “Do that nasty shit some other time!” 

Toner’s flames burn a bright magenta as he looks over his shoulder, annoyed by the interruption, “The fuck do you want, perro?” He grunts through his teeth.

“Where’s Sojo? She ain't answering her phone!” Gunny growls, holding up his cell, “I’ve been tryin' to call her for 30 minutes!”

“What!?” They both exclaim and reach for their phones, checking for any messages from her.

“Wait, I got a text from her around 1230.” Eggy exclaims, “Let’s go to the bakery, that’s the last thing she said to me.” Pushing Toner off, the trio run down the block to Good as Hell Bakery . Gunny arrives first to the front and jostles the door.

“See, ain’t no one home!” He growls, his worry increasing, “I banged on both the front and back door, but no one answered, even though the van is parked around back!” 

Eggy unlocks the front door and the three scramble in, running to the kitchen. The swinging door slams open as the sinners pile in. The sound of the fan whirs in the fridge as the oven light blinks, ready for baking. Seeing the door cracked open, Eggy runs to the maintenance closet and sees a newly installed fuse box, the thick cord leading into the wall has fresh stretched tape wrapped around it, securing the wires from the elements.

“I got her!” Toner shouts from behind the oven. Gunny and Eggy rush to him and see Sojourner, curled into a small ball, fast asleep on the floor. Her olive green coveralls are covered in dirt and grease while soot is smudged into the dark brown color of her fur. Her bun is now a loose knot hanging down between her shoulders with multiple braids splayed free. A phillip’s head screwdriver lies loosely in her open hand as the damaged outlet sits removed on the floor in front of her. Soft snores are the only sound that can be heard from her.

“Move.” Gunny orders, pushing Toner aside to scoop the bear up in his arms. Sojourner’s chest rises and falls rhythmically as her head lies comfortably on his shoulder. Her friends all breathe a sigh of relief. 

“Oh god, oh thank God,” Eggy breathes as she places a kiss on Sojourner’s forehead, “Oh, Honey Bear.”

“Did she do this?” Toner asks, pointing at the brand new wires installed in the wall. The shiny insulated cables stand out against the dusty remainder of the interior as a pile of charred wire sits neatly in the corner. “All this in one day, by herself?” The painter asks, amazed by the quality of work, he turns around when he hears a sniffle and sees tears forming in Eggy’s eyes. “Mi amor, que pasa?” He holds her sugary hands in his.

“She saved my bakery,” Eggy answers, “My shop would’ve been done for if it wasn’t for her.” Rock candy eyes gaze over to her sleeping friend, pressed against the marine’s chest. “She figured out how to get my pastries done and repair my kitchen all before tomorrow.” Squeezing Toner’s hand, tears spill over, “God, I love this girl.” 

Gunny gently adjusts his grip to put Sojourner in a more comfortable position, never taking his eyes off her face. The bear remains unphased, thoroughly exhausted by her long day.

The sinners all stand in silence as they listen to her breathing, mulling over what sins sent them to Hell in the first place. As they ponder, the same question passes through their minds while looking at Sojourner Knight: What the hell is she doing down here?

Notes:

Ooooohhh a new romance budding? Some melted sugar perhaps? When I wrote this chapter I didn't plan for this to happen at all and now I have a Bob and Linda situation that I love. I'm having fun with this my loves

Chapter 33: Got What You Wanted, Lost What You Had

Summary:

We now go back in time where our beloved Radio Demon believes he is meeting with the Queen of Hell. Refer to Chap. 30 for context.

Notes:

Y'all my front tooth is gone. I have to wait at least 6 friggin' weeks before I can try for an implant. I hate medical with an unhealthy passion. JFC.

Date : August 01, 2018

Age: Ethereal Boss Babe

Location: Queen Lilith’s Royal Garden

Weather: Dark and Ominous, with a lovely temperature of 82℉

Current Conditions: It’s trickery and fuckery up in this piece

“My dear, Radio-Demon, the strongest of sinners, I fear I must ask for your help.”  

A shiver runs through the deer demon's tall, lanky figure, his sinister smile pulls the corners of his face higher, hearing the Queen’s plea. ‘Patience, Alastor, hear what she has to offer first.’ Twirling his microphone cane, he tucks one arm behind his back as he straightens his posture. “Oh my, what could possibly be ailing the Queen of Hell, I wonder?” He plants his cane between his red toed, pointed boots, his fingers eagerly tapping in anticipation. “Please tell me what’s wrong, Your Majesty?”

“My husband is doing all he can to rule this kingdom,” Lilith starts, “However, the exterminations grow more vicious with each passing year, it is only a matter of time before Heaven breaches our agreement and starts slaying Hellborn.” She walks over to the bubbling fountain and sits on the black marble. “I don’t trust Heaven and never will, if they’re willing to turn on their own kind, demon-kind like us aren’t even an afterthought.” Silver eyes cut to Alastor, narrowing. “Their agreement is with my husband, not me, and I’m not leaving everything I care for to the whims of pretentious hypocrites.” 

Alastor remains still as he listens to the Queen, failing to see how her melancholy has anything to do with him. He watches her grip the fabric of her skirt, exposing the pale flesh of her thigh. His mouth waters, how he’d love to sink his teeth into that flawless skin, a perfect cut of prime sinner, ‘I bet she tastes divine.’

“I have a plan to stop Heaven, but I cannot involve the King and I will not endanger my daughter.” Lilith crosses her long legs and clasps her gloved hands. “However, to pull this off, I need power and skill that complements my own. I need you, Radio-Demon.”

The declaration causes Alastor’s dark heart to race with giddiness, the Queen recognizes his power and is asking for his help? This is the perfect set up for the ultimate deal, “What, pray tell, is Your Majesty’s plan, if I may ask?” Alastor grins, his body language refusing to give anything away.

Lilith studies him then concedes, ‘Can’t hurt to be honest with him.’   “I have a meeting with Adam to strike a deal that will allow me to stay on the beaches of Eden. From there, I will leave a body double and abscond into the High Angelic Court to take the place of one of the angelic counsels. I will deconstruct Heaven’s defenses from within and make them vulnerable to attack.” The Dark Queen pauses, giving the deer sinner a chance to take in the information.

Alastor mulls it over, “Interesting, however, I don’t see where I would fit into this equation, my queen.” ‘But by all means, show me your WHOLE hand, Your Majesty.’

Lilith stands up and strides over to the red-clad demon, looking down at him, “At my signal, you will lead the attack. Your command over radio signals will control the sinners and Hellborn alike and they will flank Heaven’s gate.” She gives a sly smile, “By binding ourselves to each other, our voices will become one to command the lower lives of hell. They will obey and fear you, you need only to lend me your power and the strength that comes with striking deals.” 

Alastor’s glowing red eyes gaze up at Lilith, a sensation of glee fills him as he hears the queen’s offer. ‘An entertaining idea indeed!’ “You’re quite the devoted Queen, doing all of this for the sake of your people.” Her perfume wafts around Alastor, putting him in a state of ease. Lilith turns away and takes a few steps toward the mansion, looking toward a bedroom window, Alastor turns to watch her with growing interest. Gloved arms curl around herself, one across her middle while the other stops mid-shoulder.

“Before being a queen, even before being a wife, I am a mother.” Lilith whispers, a light breeze picks up her long, golden locks, “I do all this for the most important person in my life, my daughter.” She glances over her shoulder, “I love my family more than anything and I must do what needs to be done to keep them safe.” A silver tear breaks the silhouette of her beautiful face.

Alastor represses a sneer, ‘How dull.’ He thinks disappointedly, ‘I had hoped she would have a more entertaining reason.’ He thinks back to his mother and all of the hardships she went through for his sake. ‘Though, I suppose I could sympathize with her plight in this regard.   “How very admirable, My Queen.” He says warmly as he hands her a handkerchief to wipe her tears. “Reminds me of my own mother.” 

‘Oh goody, another mama’s boy.’ Roo scoffs inwardly, ‘Jesus, is every man down here a wimp for their mommy?’ Lilith smiles and accepts the handkerchief, dabbing her eyes before handing it back. “Thank you,” She sniffs, “I’m so thankful that you understand. I know I’ve made the right choice picking you.” 

Alastor smiles widely, “But of course, Your Majesty.” He twirls his cane with flare, “From what you’ve explained, your reasoning is sound and your concerns are very much valid!” ‘Unfortunately, you’ve also told me your greatest weakness, my dear.’ Alastor is already picturing Lilith and Lucifer on their knees before him, begging for mercy as he holds their precious, little princess by the chain around her neck. ‘Securing a deal with the princess will be an easy feat, especially if she’s as trusting and desperate as her mother.’ “While you’re in Heaven, what tasks do you require of me?” ‘Any details will be beneficial to me to use later.’

‘Got ‘em’ Roo grins, ‘He thinks he has the high ground. Now to reel him in!’ Lilith straightens her posture and holds her chin up, “I will give you all the power you need to help me achieve my goal,” Excitement builds in Roo, she forces down her feelings as to not let her mask slip. “After Heaven is conquered and my family is safe, you will keep all the power and abilities you’ve acquired to reign.” Silver eyes flicker to red for a flash. Alastor swears he sees the flicker, but suddenly the perfume’s scent gets thicker, causing him to clear his throat. 

Ahem “Reign over what, Your Majesty? Pride Ring?” Alastor clarifies, coughing into his fist.

Lilith smiles devilishly, “You are helping me conquer Heaven,” She laughs, “You will rule all of Hell as its king.”  

Red drool drips down Alastor’s sharp chin as an eerie green aura takes over his form, Voodoo sigils start to float around his growing antlers. His smile is inhumanely wide and sinister as black engulfs his red scaleras, red radio dials tick in tandem.  

‘Hook, line, and sinker.’ Roo sneers. Long, golden hair begins to whip around her tall body, “So,” Lilith begins, extending her hand towards Alastor, “Do we have a deal?” Alastor looks at her hand, salivating at the offer, “Please, Alastor,” Lilith’s velvety voice breaks, “I can’t do this without you.” Roo feels the image slipping, it’s now or never!

“We have a deal.” Alastor’s long, thin hand clasps hers. Purple smoke erupts between them as a blinding light shines in their hands.

“Yeeesss…” Lilith’s low, smooth voice melts away and raises to a higher pitch. Her long blonde hair burns away to a swirling, pitch black mane. The cream color of Lilith’s face dulls to an ash gray as burning, red eyes replace silver. 

Alastor stares in stunned horror, what’s happening? Who is this woman? He cries out in pain as his hand is crushed in her steel grip; instinctively, he tries to rip his hand away and almost dislocates his shoulder. The floor-length violet gown is replaced by a long red trench coat with a black and white checkerboard liner and matching crop top. Black leather riding pants are tucked into knee-high heeled boots adding to Roo’s already tall stature. She yanks Alastor to her chest and grips his face painfully in her strong fingers.

“Hiya, stud.” She snickers, black fluid dripping from her inky-black lips, “We’ve got a lot of work to do. You ready?” A terrifying smile with sharp teeth stretches across her face. Alastor’s tall, tufted ears fall flat to his head, a sensation long-since forgotten crashes down on him all at once, fear. The Radio Demon is afraid. Roo’s essence sucks the air from his lungs, his knees turn to rubber, sweat immediately pours from his brow. 

Roo sniggers, “Aaaaww, what’s wrong, little fawn?” Red eyes appear in her dark hair as her voice becomes eldritch, “Never seen pure evil before?” Alastor’s iconic smile drops in an instant, as if he’s never smiled before in his life. Roo tuts, “Oh no, no, no! Where’s that beautiful smile you always wear? C’mon, Bambi, give me a grin!” 

His mind goes blank, he can’t feel his body, he can’t form a single thought, the only sensation that is present is pure terror . The air around them is freezing, he can’t tear his eyes away from Roo. She laughs, “Oh boo, did you lose your smile, sweetie?” Alastor tries to draw a breath, his body doesn’t obey. Roo grips his face with both hands, her sharp nails digging into his skin, “Lemme help with that.”

Alastor’s vision goes white as searing, hot pain explodes across his face. He feels the corners of his mouth yanked up, the muscles in his cheeks tearing. Something is stabbing his mouth over and over again as a course line is criss-crossed over his lips. Tears pour out of his glowing red eyes and sting the open wounds on his face. He can’t scream, his mouth won’t open! Alastor grips Roo’s wrists in an useless attempt to get her to stop when he feels the line pull at the corner of his mouth then break off. Falling to his knees, his head reels from the excruciating agony he just endured. 

Roo looks amused at the crumpled heap at her feet, “All done! Here, let me take a look at you.” She digs her heel into Alastor’s shoulder and kicks him hard onto his back, streaming tears mix down into the blood that drips from Alastor’s wide, horrified smile. Roo claps her hands giddily, “Oh, there’s that winning smile! So handsome!” She cheers cruelly. Alastor stares blankly at her, slipping into shock, “Oh, none of that, bub,” Roo snaps her fingers, a red chain appears in her gloved, spindly hands, leading to the heavy metal collar that wraps itself tightly around Alastor’s thin neck, choking him. “C’mon, cutie, we’ve got some work to do.” Roo purrs and yanks the collar, forcing Alastor to his knees, “On your feet.” She orders darkly, her almond eyes narrow, “I don’t have all fuckin’ day with you.”

On unsteady legs, Alastor stands up, barely any strength left in his body. What just happened? This isn’t right, this wasn’t supposed to happen. A swirling, dark portal opens up in front of the fountain, Alastor stares at it. ‘I can’t go with her.’ Panic builds as the gravity of his situation finally sets in. ‘No’ Huff, huff, HUFF! ‘NO!’

“Don’t even think about it, kid.” Roo warns, pulling Alastor’s petrified face to hers, “I can make you beg to be torn apart by those hounds every day for the rest of eternity.” She walks up to the portal and bows deeply, gesturing to the entrance, “After you, my good fellow!” mocking his transatlantic accent. Alastor’s feet move on their own into the swirling darkness, leaving his last night of freedom behind him. 

 

Notes:

My friend was watching me type this document at the time and she was cringing and grimacing while I was writing the torture scene. Ngl, I had fun writing it though. Keep your head up Al, it'll be fine...maybe.

Chapter 34: Trouble in Paradise

Summary:

Michael has a bittersweet dream only to wake up to a passive nightmare. Why did the angel dream of him? Why now?

Notes:

My mouth is healing up pretty okay, I miss biting things like I used to. Cutting things up into bitesize pieces is heckin' annoying but I'll get through it.

Date: April 02, 2022

Age: Ancient

Location: High Angelic Courthouse H.A.C.

Weather: Perfect, always fuckin’ perfect

Current Conditions: Disassociation is on station (subject to change)

 

The Charcoal-blue leather office chair creaks as Michael leans backward to stretch his porcelain, toned arms over his head, groaning lowly as his spine elongates with a soft pop! He lets out a long sigh as he slumps in his chair and slides down, his pointed chin digs into his ample chest as his arms flop heavily over the armrests. Gold eyes slide over to the clock, 1737. Good grief where did the day go? As per Raphael’s instruction, quitting time was almost 40 minutes ago. He feels like he had to be somewhere today, but for all his existence, he couldn’t place his finger on what. 

The archangel straightens his posture and pulls himself back to his large, marble desk. Resting his elbows on the surface, Michael scans the space of his office. Everything was so bright: the pure white walls, the gold mold trimming, the cream and gold loveseat which, to his knowledge, has never been sat on, the glass coffee table with nameless books to adornish it. Michael grimaces as he looks at the gaudy white and gold zig-zag pattern rug that took up the majority of the polished marble-tiled floor. 

The only thing that stands out against the bright decor is the rustic knotty wood door that leads out into the hallway. The stark dark contrast is the only relief for Michael’s tired eyes as he drags his calloused hands down his worn face. He swears he’s forgetting something, what in Paradise is it? He looks down at the multicolored case files sitting on his desk

“I have a few more files left,” Michael yawns and puts his forehead down on the cool surface of his desk, “I’ll finish those… then… zzzzz .”

“Michael!” A bright voice calls out in the distance, “Michael, look what I found today!” 

Michael turns around to see his twin, Samael, flying towards him at lightspeed, “Sammy, SLOW DO- OOF!” The older twin crashes into his younger brother and they tumble across the clouds in a heap. Michael groans as his brother laughs on top of him, “Sammyyyy,” Michael whines, “Again with the crashing?” He sits up, rolling Samael into his lap. Looking down at his twin’s face, he sees smudges of dirt and bits of leaves tangled in his platinum blond hair. Michael frowns, “You went again, didn’t you?” He whispers, Samael looks away with a guilty grimace. Michael rolls his eyes and sighs, “Sammy, you know we aren’t allowed down there without explicit permission!” He scolds. 

The older twin’s expression saddens, his lower lip juts out into a pout. ‘No, not the lip’ Michael whines inwardly. Heaving a sigh, he concedes, “What did you find?” Annoyed that Sammy’s pouty face wins again. “And fix your hair and face, you’re filthy!” He fusses, using his white sleeve to clean the dirt off his twin’s face. 

Samael sits up, his somber mood already forgotten, “Gimme your hands!” He whispers, holding his cupped ones up, “Okay, don’t let her fly away! I have to bring her back right after this.” Samael places the tiny insect into his brother’s waiting hands. Michael looks down and his eyes sparkle with wonder, the two white spots on the black head resemble eyes, the brilliant red of its shell is offset by seven little black dots scattered across it. Michael’s face flushes gold with excitement, “What is she?” He asks excitedly. Samael shushes him harshly, “What is she?” Michael asks again in a much quieter voice, watching the creature travel along his finger.

“Adam named her Ladybug!” Samael explains gleefully, “Isn’t she pretty?” He holds his finger up to Michael’s, creating a bridge for her to walk on.

“She’s spectacular. Look at her spo- what is she doing?” Michael’s heavy eyebrow raises as the shell splits open to reveal translucent brown wings.

“Oh, no you don’t, Miss Ladybug!” Samael catches her in his cupped hands just as she takes flight, “It took forever to catch you last time,” He laughs. A wide smile dances across Michael’s face.

“She’s just beautiful, Sammy.” Michael sighs happily, “But you have to take her back before someone finds o-”

“There you two are.” A soft, melodic voice calls out, “I’ve been looking for you everywhere!”

The twins gasp and instinctively lean towards each other. Gabriel is flying in their direction, arriving at any second. Michael sprouts out his six wings and spreads them to cover Samael. 

“Hide her!” He whispers through a gritted grin, “Hi Gabriel, do you need something?” Michael asks, brightly. Gabriel lands, tucking his silver wings behind him as he makes the last few steps towards his little brothers. 

“What have you two been up to?” Gabriel asks as he pushes his wispy, hazel hair out of his eyes.  

Michael keeps his eyes locked on the taller angel, “Oh, nothing much, we were just uuuhh…”

*GULP!* Michael hears something being eaten, his face freezes, ‘He didn’t…’ Both Michael and Gabriel turn to Samael who has the most ridiculous half smile, half grimace on his perfect face. 

“Samael?” Gabriel asks slowly, “Are you alright?” His confusion grows by the second at the twin’s strange behavior.

Samael answers with a nod and a high pitched mumble, not opening his mouth or moving his jaw. Gabriel turns to Michael with a raised eyebrow, waiting for an answer. 

“We’re playing how long Samael can go without talking!” Michael blurts out, his golden eyes stare widely at his twin, “And he’s trying to make me laugh with silly faces!” Michael throws an arm around Samael, giving Gabriel an overly wide smile. 

The messenger angel stares with his mouth slightly agape as he nods slowly, “Okay, that sounds… like a game, I suppose?” Samael’s eye twitches violently as a strange, muffled buzzing can be heard, “Are you sure he’s okay?” Gabriel asks as he eyes Samael down.

Michael looks to his twin and sees the sheen of sweat start to gather on his temple, “Uuuuh, yes! He’s fine, I just don’t think he’s gone this long without saying a word!” Michael laughs awkwardly for an uncomfortable amount of time. A beat of silence passes before Michael clears his throat and asks, “Did you need something, brother?” His face flushes gold with embarrassment.

”Um, yes, Father wanted me to tell Samael: to put her back where you found her and for you, Michael, to come see Them.” Gabriel pauses, “Put who back where?” He asks, tilting his head inquisitively. 

“C-couldn’t tell you.” Michael lies, instantly clamming up, “But I’m on my way right now.” He turns to his twin with nervous eyes, “I’ll see you later Sammy, I love you.” 

“Mmm hmm hm mm.” Samael hums back with a wave. Michael takes flight and waits for Gabriel to join him. Gabriel takes one last, strange look at Samael and leads Michael away. Samael immediately spits out the ladybug, gagging and dry heaving as she angrily buzzes around his head, “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! Blegh!”

Michael springs up from his desk, startled. A long line of drool strings from his lip to the wet surface of a gray file. Grimacing, he wipes the side of his face with the back of his hand with a disgusted groan before cleaning off the file. Immediately, the archangel feels terrible for drooling on it, ‘That’s someone’s soul, Michael, show some respect!’ He chastises himself as he gives the folder a once over before placing it back down. 

Bzzzz, bzzz. His phone vibrates, signaling a text message. Picking it up, Michael unlocks the home screens and sees several missed calls. Anxiety spikes immediately as he scrambles to check his messages. Before he can, his phone rings again, Raphael’s name appears on the caller ID, Michael swipes the green button, “Hello, ahem! Hello?” His voice is heavy with sleep. 

“Well, it's about time you answered! Where are you?” Raphael’s voice is tight with stress, “This is the third time I’ve called, what are you doing? Are you alright?”

Michael rubs his tired eyes, “I’m fine, I just lost track of time” He fights back a yawn, “Is something wrong? Did you need me?” He asks as he runs his fingers through his hair in an attempt to fix it. 

“Yes, the family dinner started 20 minutes ago, Azrael is asking where you are.” Raphael whispers, “Uriel and Jophiel are keeping him calm, but you need to get here, now!”

Michael freezes, “Tonight? Th- the family dinner is to-tonight?” He pushes the case files off his planner and looks at the date, I thought it was this Saturday!” 

“It is Saturday,” Raphael confirms. 

“No, it’s Wednesday!” Michael argues, staring at his desk calendar. 

“Did you forget to switch months again?” Raphael asks gently, looking over his shoulder at his siblings. Azrael is sitting in a corner with a bourbon, seething and staring daggers at him. The healer can hear paper rustling over the phone, the sound of the previous month being torn away. 

“Oh, shit.” A panicked voice whispers on the other line, “Oh, shit, shit, SHIT!” Furniture is pushed away as Michael scrambles to put everything away and grab his jacket, “I-I’m on my way! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” 

“Michael, Michael!” Raphael calls out, “It’s okay, just get here quickly.” He tries to calm the warrior angel down, “The food isn’t ready yet and we’re not even seated, relax!” 

“I’ll be there in a few minutes!” Michael rambles, getting more flustered by the second, “Do I need to bring anything?” He asks as he sprints out of the H.A.C. and takes flight. 

“No, just yourself. But seriously, take your time, it’s alright, honest.” The windows of the Seraphim Manor rumble as a blue streak whizzes by. Michael straightens his light gray suit jacket and adjusts his mustard yellow pocket square. Fixing his hair to the best of his abilities, he takes a deep breath and reaches for the sparkling, gold knocking handle of the grand, dual doors to the Manor. The doors open before Michael has a chance to knock, revealing Emily’s jovial face. 

Gasp! “You’re here, hi Michael!” She cheers excitedly and grabs his hand, pulling him inside, “I was wondering when you were going to arrive!” Emily loops her arm through Michael’s and walks him to the dining room, “We can sit together, I have a fun story to tell you about-” Her sentence is cut off as she nearly bumps into Azrael, “Oop! hi, Azrael!” She greets brightly, “Are you enjoying the party?” Azrael glowers down at Michael, anger burns in his eyes. Michael instinctively calls himself to attention, refusing to make eye contact. Emily waves a hand in front of Azrael, “Hellooo, Azrael, I asked if you’re enjoying yourself?” She leans her head into Azrael’s line of sight, blocking Michael from his view.

Burning, red eyes narrow before looking at Emily and softening, “Yes, Emily. Now that everyone is in attendance, I’m sure I can enjoy myself now.” A cold sweat breaks out on Michael’s forehead as he suppresses a shudder.

Emily feels a slight tremor come from Michael, she places a calming hand on his shoulder before speaking, “That’s good, we’ll see you at dinner.” She gently guides Michael away, doing her best to shield him from Azrael’s gaze. Looking down at Michael, her cheery face contorts with worry when she sees how distant his eyes are. She rubs his arm soothingly with her thumb, “Let’s get you some water, okay? Then we can go say hello to Raphael.” Her gentle voice grounds Michael enough that he nods in response.

Soon, the dinner bell rings and everyone takes their respective seats with Sera at the head of the table with Gabriel and Azrael seated by her sides. Sera looks around with a raised eyebrow, where’s Emily? She usually sits next to Gabriel, where did she go? She spots Emily guiding Michael to sit near the opposite end of the banquet table, “Emily?” She calls out, getting everyone’s attention. 

Bright, blue eyes look up and give her older sister a sweet smile, “I’m going to sit here with Michael, today!” She answers back, happily pointing at their seats. The other seraphims give her a strange look and lean toward each other, whispering. 

Michael feels his face get hot at the attention, “Emily,” He looks up at her with a worn smile, “It’s okay, go sit with Sera.” He says quietly.

Emily frowns, “Okay, we’ll go together.” She states, holding her hand out. 

“No!” Michael whispers anxiously. 

“Then I’m sitting right here with you!” Emily declares with a smile and sits down with a bounce. She looks over at Michael and pats the seat beside her, “Come on, have a seat. I told you I have a fun story to tell you, it’s about Colonel Knobbles.”

Michael takes a seat with a neutral expression, doing his best to ignore the stares from his siblings. Cherub angels serve them their dinner, a perfectly done pot roast with brown gravy, scalloped potatoes, garlic green beans and a Caesar side salad. Michael pokes at his food while listening to Emily’s tale of how Colonel Knobbles, the trouble-making goat, has once again wreaked havoc by agitating the chickens and chasing them into the geese section of the farm, sending everything into a frenzy. Michael gives a little smile as Emily breaks down into a fit of giggles. 

“I can’t imagine how much trouble he must’ve caused when he was on Earth, my goodness!” Emily snorts, “He’s the naughtiest goat in existence! I love him!” 

“That was a very funny story, Emily. Thank you for telling me.” Michael says quietly, pushing his food around before taking a small bite. The food is delicious, but his appetite is nonexistent knowing how angry Azrael is at him. Feeling his mouth drying up, Michael goes to take a sip of red wine, then decides against it, opting for water instead. The rest of the dinner continues without incident when suddenly, Gabriel’s eyes roll into the back of his head and a brilliant light pours out of his eyes and mouth. The table falls silent waiting for Gabriel to come back, Father has sent another message. 

Gabriel takes a panicked breath as the light goes out and his eyes return to their normal hazel color. He keels forward, but Raphael catches him before he can hit the table. “Gabriel?” Raphael holds his brother’s head in his hands, lifting his eyelids to inspect his irises. “Gabe, speak to me. Can you hear me?” Gabriel lets out a low moan as he slowly comes to, his skin becomes clammy as he catches his breath. 

“Ngh, Ra-Raph?” Gabriel grumbles as he lifts his heavy head to look at his brother, “Fa-father said…” he passes out cold, leaning into his brother’s shoulder. 

Raphael looks at Sera and shakes his head, “We’ll have to wait until he comes to.” He declares pulling Gabriel into his lap, “I’ll put him in bed to rest.” 

“How long do you think he’ll be unconscious for?” Sera asks standing up, everyone else follows suit. 

“I’d give him until tomorrow, you know it’s not very often he loses consciousness after receiving His word.” Raphael determines before vanishing away leaving a flurry of Angelica in his wake. 

Sera dabs her mouth with a napkin before speaking, “We will have to wait until tomorrow to hear His word. Once I received word of Gabriel’s condition, we will reconvene at the courthouse at an appointed time.” There are mumbles of agreement before quieting down, “This dinner is adjourned, thank you everyone for coming.” Sera thanks politely, “Please enjoy the rest of your evening everyone.” The angels push in their chairs and return to their previous conversations as they exit. Azrael wipes his mouth before throwing down his napkin and turning to leave, “Azrael,” Sera says sternly, “Leave him be.”

Azrael glares darkly before fixing his expression, “As you wish.” He answers, not looking at her. 

Sera frowns, “Remember what I’ve told you, there is a line between discipline and cruelty. Do not blend the two.” She warns with an edge in her tone. There’s a beat of silence between them before Azrael speaks. 

“Yes, Sera.” He finally answers, before walking away, “Good night.” 

“Good night, Azrael.” Sera wishes back.

Michael lays in his bed, staring at the ceiling. He’s exhausted, but cannot fall asleep out of fear of what awaits him tomorrow, ‘I have training tomorrow morning.’ Michael pulls in a shaky breath, ‘It’s your fault for not remembering the dinner tonight. Whatever happens tomorrow is on you.’ He screws his eyes shut, begging himself to fall asleep, ‘You can handle whatever happens tomorrow, you’re okay. Just try to think of something else.’  

What else was there to think about? Work? The dinner? How no one in his family spares a glance at him, let alone speak a word in his direction? Well, there’s Emily, she was the only good part of the evening. The silly story of Colonel Knobbles helped him through dinner, that was nice. That awful goat, always getting into mischief and causing trouble. But at least he’s funny, right? His shenanigans remind Michael of… His mind races back to the dream he had earlier. ‘Michael, look what I found today!’ A familiar voice rings out in his head, ‘Adam named her Ladybug, isn’t she pretty?’  

BRRRING! BRRRING! BRR- The alarm clock is slapped, shutting off the noisy ringing. Michael lifts his heavy head, blinking heavily at the time: 0445. He wipes his hand across his eyes, but stops confused. Wet? Why is his face wet? Alabaster fingers touch his cheek as he looks down at his pillow, a large wet spot sits in the center. ‘Gimme your hands, don’t let her fly away.’ Fresh tears begin to fall again as Michael sits up on his knees. 

“Oh.” He says flatly, “That’s why.” He throws back the covers and gets out of bed.

It’s going to be that sort of day, huh? 

Notes:

Michael, my sweet summer child. Hang in there precious, everything will work out in the end. Maybe...

Chapter 35: Flight-Risk

Summary:

It's Mother's Day weekend in Hell and what better way to celebrate the holiday than to trauma dump between friends? Some deep Sojo home life lore when she was a wee child that leads to Sojo and Gunny getting closer than ever.

Notes:

Trigger Warning: Death in the Family, Domestic Violence, and child abuse.

This chapter is very heavy, but does give some much needed lore about our leading lady bear. It will pick back up in mood later I promise.

Date: May 12, 2022

Age: Dead for over three and a half years

Location: Inside the van, overlooking the edge of the junkyard

Weather: Dusky, warm, breezy

Current Condition: Got some fast food for dinner because fuck them dishes

A wrapper is crumpled up and tossed into the grease-stained paper bag as Sojourner fishes out her large fries and honey-mustard sauce. She wipes her face with a wrinkled napkin before grabbing two fries and dunking them in the sauce, tossing them in her mouth with a satisfying crunch. Gunny sighs contentedly as he takes a big bite of his double-decker bacon burger, spicy secret sauce drips onto his muscled chest. Grunting, he wipes it up with his thumb and licks it off.

Sojourner grimaces, “You do know we worked in a funky, old building all day, right? Like our clothes are rife with tuberculosis and… and rabies?” She takes a sip of her large sweet tea.

Gunny nods as he wipes off his shirt with a sullied napkin, “I like how the asbestos adds flavor. Reminds me of the barracks and tank garages.” Sojourner almost does a spit take at the comment. Sweet tea dribbles down her chin as she holds her hand underneath her mouth, continuing to laugh. Gunny pounds on his chest as he laughs and tries to swallow his food at the same time, nearly choking. Cough, COUGH! “Ugh, damn it.” He chortles as he grabs his BBQ Soda and takes several gulps, washing the food down.

“Oh god, the barracks? How long has it been since I’ve even thought of the barracks?” Sojourner grins as she crosses her legs in the passenger seat, “Fuck, they were disgusting! The black mold, the stench of bleach, the nasty-ass couple porking in the laundry room.” She sighs, reminiscing of her days when she was a junior sailor and all the crazy shit she saw, “Man, those days were the fucking best!” 

“You had a laundry room? Shit, y’all’re spoiled, we had to go to the laundromat on base with the old washers from the 70’s and two working dryers.” Gunny smiles and grabs a fry from the bottom of the bag. 

“Holy fuck, your dryers worked? I thought base dryers were just for show!” Sojourner asks sarcastically, feigning surprise before smiling again. A comfortable silence is shared between her and her marine counterpart as the songs on the radio pause for a commercial break.

This Sunday, in celebration of Mother’s Day, All prices at Velvette’s boutique will be five percent off if you can prove you’re a mother! Join us this Sunday for our Mother’s Day sale!  

“Wow, a whole five percent off? That’s crazy.” Sojourner mocks dryly as she takes a sip of her drink, “Lamb, even down here, Mother’s Day is a huge deal.” More honey-mustard dipped fries go into her mouth. Gunny raises a heavy brow as he casts a side eye at Sojourner, he takes another bite out of his burger and wipes his mouth.

”What? Ya don’t like Mother’s Day?” He asks between bites, “More of a daddy’s girl?” A snort escapes him as Sojourner gives him the most offended look.

”What the fuck, never!” She recoils, holding her fries protectively to her chest, “How very dare you!”

Gunny laughs and holds up his hand in defense, “Goddamn, my bad, Paddington! Didn’t mean to upset ya, shoot!” He pops the rest of his burger into his mouth, “Don’t like yer old man or somethin’?” Sojourner looks down at her fries and shakes them around, thinking about her answer, “Well? Gonna leave me in suspense?” Gunny asks as he swirls his soda around.

Sojourner heaves a sigh, “I… I don’t… I mean… siiiighhh… No, I don’t like him. At all. Or his wife.” Gunny switches off the radio and turns in his seat, getting comfortable as he leans back against the window. Sojourner cuts him a side eye and groans, “C’mon, do we really gotta? We were having such a good time just now.” She whines. 

“Hey! Last week, I sat with you for three hours telling you ‘bout my momma, my daddy, my granddaddy, er’body! I gave you a crash course into who Chester Oscar Pulitzer was alive and dead. It’s your turn, missy, now talk!” Chester orders, narrowing his green eyes at her, “Talk or you ain’t getting shit from me ever again, ya hear?”

”My shit is depressing.” Sojourner groans, “It’s nothing but drama, dog.” She slumps against the window dramatically. 

“Well, yer a drama queen, so it can’t be all that bad.” Gunny states dryly as he steals a few of Sojourner’s fries, “Now, c’mon. What happened?” 

Sojourner half-glares at the marine, “I am not a drama queen.” She mutters, “Not a big one anyway.”

“What ya are is a pain in my ass with all this stallin’!” Gunny growls and snatches the rest of the fries from her. “Am I gonna have to pull rank?” Sojourner grumbles and looks away. 

“No.” She huffs, refusing to make eye contact. 

“No, what?” Gunny presses, leaning towards her. 

“…No, sir.” Sojourner answers begrudgingly, her face heats up with embarrassment.

’Fuckin’ brat.’ “Good, now sound off.” Gunny orders as he dumps the rest of the fries into his maw and settles back down.

The bear heaves a sigh and untucks a leg underneath her, “Alright where to start?” She wonders to herself, “I guess 12 is a good place. Here we go.”

______________

20 Years Ago, Sojourner- 12 Years Old, October 29, 2001, Jay Stone’s Residence- Clinton, Maryland

“And you’ll call when you two land?” Sojourner asks as she helps drag a suitcase downstairs for her mom. Elijah helps their Aunt Jay with hers and follows his little sister down the steps. 

”Mm-hmm.” Their mother, Joy, confirms as she checks the contents of her carry-on one last time. “Our flight should land around 7:30, so expect a call around bedtime when we get to Aunt Sarina’s okay?” 

“Okay!” The children answer at the same time. A horn honks outside. 

“Joy, that’s our cab. C’mon kids, help us with our bags won’t you?” Aunt Jay asks as she pulls on her coat. The children each snatch a bag and race towards the front door, scrambling to beat each other to get there first. The sisters chuckle and shake their heads at the same time, “Y’all are too crazy, you know that? Both of y’all are too old to be racin’ each other like this.” Aunt Jay laughs as she follows them out the door. 

The family walks to the cab together and the driver gets out and loads the luggage in the trunk. Their mother and Aunt Jay give Sojourner and Elijah each a big hug and a kiss on the cheek, “Your father should be here in about eight If he’s not here by nine, knock on Ms. Carla’s door to let her know you two are okay.” Their mother instructs. The brother and sister nod in compliance and look at their next door neighbor’s door. 

The twin sisters climb in the cab and roll down the window, “We love you two! We’ll see you on Sunday! Keep the house clean for the Open House!” 

“See you on Sunday!” They parrot back as the cab pulls away.

“We’re going to throw a rager!” Sojourner shouts. 

“And hire strippers!” Elijah adds as they roll up the window. 

“Sounds great, there’s money in the dresser that your mom thinks we don’t know about!” Aunt Jay cackles as she leans out the window, “We love y’all!” 

“Love you!” The teens answer back and head back inside for the evening. 

2100 rolled around and their father, Charles, hadn’t shown up yet; then again, the phone call from mom and Aunt Jay hadn't been made yet either. The kids let Ms. Carla know that they were doing alright and had eaten dinner. The neighbor instructed the two to be in bed by ten as it was a school night to which the teens obeyed, not wanting to greet their father with disobedience.

_____________________

0213 October 30, 2001- Aunt Jay’s House  

*Knock,knock,knock,knock!* There’s frantic knocking at the door, Elijah and Sojourner run down stairs to the foyer to answer. Elijah orders Sojourner to stay at the top of the stairs as he looks through the eyepiece. It’s their neighbor Ms. Carla. 

“Ms. Carla?” Elijah asks, his voice groggy with sleep, “What’s wrong?” 

*Sniff!* “He-hey kiddo, open the door, you both need to come with me.” Ms. Carla’s voice sounds tight with emotion. Elijah looks up at Sojourner confused then opens the door. Ms. Carla’s fair face is beat-red and her eyes are swollen, like she has just finished crying, yet she tries to force a gentle smile. 

Sojourner comes jogging down the stairs, “Ms. Carla, what’s the matter?” The young girl peeks from behind her older brother’s shoulder, “Why are you crying?” 

The neighbor wipes her face with her gray cardigan sleeve, “Uuuumm… It’s a little complicated, baby. I’m here to take you to your dad.” She answers with a loud sniff, “Come on, let’s pack some clothes and grab your shoes, your daddy’s waiting.” 

Elijah and Sojourner share a concerned look before heading up stairs to pack an overnight bag. Thirty minutes later, the siblings are in the car with Ms. Carla, taking their school bags and three days worth of clothes with them.

________________

Present Day - Inside the Van

Gunny nervously chews on his straw as he listens to Sojourner’s story. She trailed off, looking at the dusk approaching, “Squid,” He calls out gently, jolting her back, “What happened?” Sojourner pulls in a shuddering breath. 

“There was a mishap,” She answers as her eyes glaze over, “Plane crash, no survivors.” She looks vacantly out of the windshield as she recalls the memory clear as day, “Ms. Carla took us to our dad. Our house was about 45 minutes away from Aunt Jay’s, but he had been with police all night. That’s why he hadn’t come to get us.” 

Gunny lets out a whine, his tall ears fall flat to his head. She wasn’t kidding, this is depressing, “Sojo, I’m-“ 

“Oh, baby,” She interrupts, “I’m nowhere near finished.” Gunny’s brows shoot up with surprise. 

“Fuck, there’s more?” He asks incredulously as his green eyes widen. 

“You’d better buckle the fuck in, my guy. You’re about to get all the lore.” Sojourner half-smiles. Taking a deep breath, she continues, “Ms. Carla dropped us off and gave us each a huge hug, all while fighting back tears.”

______________________

0328 October 30, 2001- Knight’s Residence  

Charles watches as Ms. Carla kisses Sojourner on the cheek, leaving tears on her face, “You k-kids call me for a-anything, okay?” Her light voice wavering as she tries not to cry, “I’m gonna give you all your privacy.” She gives Charles a harsh glare before climbing back into her car and driving away. Elijah and Sojourner stare surprised, what was that look for? 

They follow their dad into the house and into the living room, “Dad,” Elijah asks, looking up at his father, “Is everything alright? What’s goin-” His sentence stops midway as his light brown eyes fall on a tall, light-skinned woman sitting on the couch, “Oh, hello.” Elijah says politely. 

“Hello, ma’am.” Sojourner greets as she joins her brother’s side, “My name is-”

“Sojourner, I know. And you’re Elijah, it’s wonderful to meet both of you.” The woman says softly. A warm smile dances in her eyes, “I’m Xenia, I’m a friend of your dad’s. I understand you kids probably are a little confused right now, and that’s okay.” Her voice is sweet like honey.

Charles guides his children further into the living room and has them sit down on the couch adjacent to Xenia. A little hand twitches as a soft snore can be heard. The teens look down and see a toddler fast asleep on the opposite couch, his little belly is seen rising and falling in his fireman onesie pj’s. Xenia laughs quietly, “This is Matthias, he is about to turn two in January.” Sojourner grins at the child, she absolutely adores babies and is an excellent babysitter. 

“He’s so cute!” She whispers with a smile, her dimples deeply denting her cheeks. 

“Sir, have you heard from mom?” Elijah asks, looking away from Matthias, “She didn’t call when she landed.” 

Charles and Xenia look at each other with cautious glances. Xenia gives Charles an encouraging nod before he sits down on the couch, facing his children, “Guys, there’s no easy way to tell you this,” He starts as he searches for the right words, “Your mom isn’t coming back, neither is your aunt.”

Sojourner feels her heart drop into her stomach, “Wh-what do you mean, sir?” She asks as her whole body goes numb, “Are *choke* Are they okay?” 

Charles nods, not making eye contact with either of them, “I found out that your mom has been having an affair for a while now. Your Aunt Jay helped her leave to be with him, that’s why they’re selling the house.” 

Elijah and Sojourner stare in disbelief, “N-no, that can’t be right.” Elijah starts as he fights off shock, “Aunt Jay is just moving closer to Aunt Sarina and mom’s helping her. That’s what they told us.” 

“This is a just a misunderstanding,” Sojourner argues, “Mom would never-”

“She cut off her phone line, honey.” Xenia interjects, “Call them, see for yourselves.”

Elijah scrambles to the house phones and dials his mom’s number, immediately receiving voicemail. Sojourner cranes her neck to listen, “Tr-try Aunt Jay!” She quakes as panic grows. The same result happens, straight to voicemail. 

Tears well up in Sojourner’s eyes as she turns to her father, “Dad, this is a joke, right? Mom didn’t leave us, she wouldn’t.” Tears fall freely from her eyes, “Mom is coming back, right?”

Charles shakes his head solemnly, “I’m sorry, Baby Doll, it’s the truth. Your mom and I wer- are going through a divorce. When I found out about the affair, I gave her the papers. We wanted to keep you and Elijah out of it as much as we could. That’s why I didn’t argue when she took you two to live at your aunt’s house, I didn’t want you two to worry.” Xenia looks sadly at the grief-stricken teens. 

“It’s true, babies. I work closely with your father, this has been affecting his job. Your mom even went as far to get your father to be force-retired as payback.” She tucks her wavy, light brown hair behind her ear, “All your dad wanted in the divorce was you two, he was even going to let your mom keep the house. But her lover wanted her to be where he was.” Sojourner feels light-headed, Charles notices and quickly guides her and Elijah back to the couch.

He holds his kids each in an arm and squeezes them tight, “It’s going to be okay, I’m here, I got you.”

_______________

Present Day- Back in the Van  

“Woah, woah, woah! Hold on, back up!” Gunny starts as he holds up his hands for Sojourner to pause, “I thought you said your mama and auntie passed in a plane crash!” Confusion is etched on all of his features.

Sojourner nods, “Yep.” She answers. 

“The same plane they got on to go see your Auntie Sarabi?!” Gunny clarifies, adjusting to a more comfortable position. 

“Aunt Sarina.” The small bear corrects calmly, “But, yes, that’s correct.”

Gunny pauses as his eyes dart back and forth as he pieces the information together, “Okay, wait, shit.” Scratching his head as he racks his brain, “You also said your step-mama and baby brother were there at the house that night, right?” 

“My dad’s wife, but yes to both.” Sojourner says, eating a stale fry. “He was about to turn two.” 

“But he’s your half-brother?” Gunny asks, his face contorted in confusion. 

“Yes, he’s my dad’s and Xenia’s.” Sojourner answers, waiting for the shoe to drop. 

“So is baby sister?” The marine continues, “Same parents as baby brother?”

Sojourner nods as she hunts for more fries at the bottom of the bags. 

“And the divorce hadn’t gone through yet?” Gunny continues, gathering the last few clues.

The sailor shakes her head as she successfully finds two fries and eats them, “Didn’t need to anymore because my mom had died that night.”

Gunny stares flabbergasted at his friend, “Did ya daddy not know what happened that night?”

Sojourner nods, “Yeah, remember? That’s why he hadn’t come to Aunt Jay’s to come get us. He was with the police, confirming the deaths.” She wipes her fingers with a napkin and picks up her diluted drink. ‘He’s almost got it.’ She thinks to herself as she takes a sip. 

Staring off hard to his left, Gunny thinks, “Then…then why did he tell ya that yer mama ran off to be with some guy?”

Leaning comfortably against the window, Sojourner crosses her arm across her belly, “Because he lied. She left to confirm the new house she had bought for us to be closer to family after she divorced my dad.” She explains, popping off the lid and eating some ice, “She was going to let him have the house up north because he and Xenia were expecting another baby.” The melted ice crunches loudly in her teeth.

The marine's mouth falls open, “Holy shit,” He whispered, “He’s the cheater.” Sojourner nods, looking down at the ice before eating more, “Why…why didn’t he tell you two that yer mama…?” He trails off, horrified. 

“Because she left the house in my and Elijah’s names in her will and hadn’t taken us off yet before she died.” Sojourner explained between crunches, “Dad, legally couldn’t keep the house if Elijah or I choose not to live with him. And if we knew what he did to our mom, we would’ve wanted to live with our relatives.” Crunch, crunch, crunch. “So, to make sure that didn’t happen, we didn’t know our mom and Aunt had left this mortal realm. He brainwashed us into hating them.”

Gunny stares at her mortified, “Sojo. What. The. Fuck?” His skin gets hot under his thick black and brown fur. He feels his lower eyelid twitch, “When… how did you and your brother eventually find out? At the funeral?” 

“We didn’t go to the funeral.” Sojourner explains casually, “Dad changed his number so our relatives couldn’t find us. So we missed it.” She tosses her empty cup into the paper bag, “Since Dad had custody of us, he sold the house and moved all of us to the west coast as soon as he could.” She looks away with an unreadable expression, “Xenia and Dad got married immediately, Elijah and I grew violently apart, then Cha-cha was born. And me,” Her voice gets quieter, “I became Cinderella. I cooked, I cleaned, I raised Matthias and Harmony, did all that until I was 18 years old and I left for the Navy.”

The German Shepherd's hearts sinks further down into his gut, how could a parent do something so fucked up? This sounded like something in a soap opera or a Disney movie, not someone’s life. 

“We were isolated until Queen and Dezzi finally got a hold of us three years after mom and Aunt Jay died.” Sojourner starts to fidget with a braid that frames her face, “They showed up one day and told Elijah and me everything. We didn’t know what to believe at first, Elijah was a lot more resistant than I was to the truth because of how much Dad and Xenia favored him over me, but eventually he came around.” Her braid unravels and her hands drop into her lap, “But by then, a lot of damage had already been done, at least by Dad and Xenia. They abused the shit out of me, mentally, verbally, and emotionally, especially after I learned the truth. They also used Tide and Cha-cha against me a couple of times, even after I had already joined the military. And then one time too many, that led to a fight.” 

Sojourner begins to pull at the braid on the other side of her face, “Queen got hurt. Bad. I don’t remember what happened clearly, but I know I was on leave for the holidays to go see Tide and Cha-cha. It got nasty really quick, Dad had said something fucked up to me and Queen went off. The next thing I know, the police are there, Queen was in an ambulance, and Tide and Cha-cha were living with Elijah and Aura.” She frowns at the memory, “That was the last time I’d spoken to or saw Dad or Xenia ever again. My siblings and I made plans for Tide and Cha-cha to be my dependents when I got back from Japan and we both know how that turned out.” Rolling her eyes.

As her braid unravels, Sojourner drops her hands up in her lap, “I only had a little over month left before we were all together again.” Her voice wavers, “Whelp, that’s Sojourner Knight in a nutshell, pre-military anyway.” She sighs and looks at Gunny, who has a grief-stricken look on his face, “You gonna be okay, big guy?” She asks playfully. Gunny looks out the windshield, sadness clear on his face. Sojourner winces, “I warned you that it wasn’t gonna be pretty, hon.” She tries to laugh it off, but it comes out strained and awkward. The marine doesn’t move or respond. Sojourner frowns, “Gunny, come on, it's over now. I survived, it’s all good!” Nothing. She grabs his hand and shakes him, “Gunn-”

He grabs hold of her hand and pulls her into his lap, catching her in a crushing hug. Shock takes over, “Chess?” Sojourner asks as she’s held against his broad chest, “Hey, it alright.” She soothes, her arms trapped in his embrace. He squeezes tighter, not saying a word. Sojourner feels trembling and looks up. Gunny does his best to hide his face, but there’s no mistaking the tears that slide down his handsome face. Immediately, her red and green eyes sting, “Hey now, don’t do that!” She orders, her voice catching, “Chester?…Please don’t.” He nuzzles his face into her hair. 

“I’m sorry, gal.” His low voice breaks, “I am so, so sorry, you never deserved that.

Emotions flood Sojourner’s system and overwhelm her. Burying her face into her best friend’s shoulder, she breaks down, releasing decades of pented-up pain.

______________

0223 Present Day, May 23, 2022- Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electrical Repairs- Apartment- Living Room

Sojourner isn’t sure how long she and Gunny cried for, or when exactly she fell asleep, but a loud noise snaps her eyes open. Blinking sleepily, the sailor realizes she’s on the couch of their living room, but what’s that rumbling underneath her?

SNOOOOORE! Sojourner jolts and lifts her head to look up at Gunny sleeping soundly with his head comfortably on the armrest. His heavy arm holds her snuggly against his body as the other is slung across his eyes. SNOOOOORE! His deep inhale makes Sojourner rise and fall on his chest. 

‘We fell asleep together?’ Sojourner asks herself as she watches her friend sleep. Normally, she can’t stand being touched, let alone anyone holding her. But this? This is nice. She doesn’t hate it, in fact, it’s pretty comfortable. She feels…safe. Sojourner wraps her arms around Gunny's torso, the movement causes him to snort and cease his destruction of the rainforests, now breathing deeply and quietly. Lying her head back down, she places her ear over his heart. Ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-thump . The slow and steady beat lulls her back to sleep. 

She could get used to this.

Notes:

Told ya it was heavy, but hey I threw in some fluff! Y'all like fluff, right? If Sojo and Gunny got together what do you think their pairing name would be? I'm curious.

Chapter 36: A Happy Man

Summary:

Throw the rice and catch the bouquet! We got a wedding on our hands people! Two our beloved characters have tied the knot! Let's celebrate this joyous occasion and grow our bonds for the future.
Here are the two songs featured in this chapter
Die a Happy Man- performed by Sammy Arriaga
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dz0HeW1dgiI&pp=ygUXZGllIGEgaGFwcHkgbWFuIHNwYW5pc2g%3D

Be More by Steven Sanchez
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R95ILhksGt8&pp=ygUHYmUgbW9yZQ%3D%3D

Notes:

If it's not one thing its another, whoever chronic illness needs to sleep on a cactus for real!

Date: July 25, 2022

Age: Dead for 14 years

Location: Tone-Death Paint Shop Paint garages

Weather: Warm evening, perfect for a small wedding 

Current Conditions: A shot-gun wedding reception with speeches done and dancing is mandatory

Gunny and Sojourner sit on either side of Toner and Eggy, leaning toward the bride and groom for another picture. FWASH! The flash goes off, partially blinding the group for a brief moment before their vision returns. The marine wears a deep forest green button-up with a tan leather belt holding up dark washed jeans over black cowboy boots. Toner is wearing a similar outfit, his shirt is a rich blue and his belt has a large silver buckle of a paint palette with steel toed black cowboy boots. 

Sojourner looks beautiful in her knee length, asymmetrical emerald green flounce cocktail dress. Gold- colored Roman sandals criss-cross up to her calves as her long braids weave into one intricate braid that flows down her back. Gold bangles and cuffs adorn her ears, hair, and wrists, complementing her simple makeup of eyeliner and lip gloss. 

Eggy makes a stunning bride, looking like a living cake decoration. Her bright, white princess style wedding dress is decorated with buttercream vanilla flowers and sparkles with large crystals of sugar. The lace tulle is made out of finely spun sugar that serves as the veil that is fastened to her pastel pink batted hairdo. Hot pink icing coats her plump lips as bubblegum smile-dip dust her cheeks to a demure blush. Her sweet smell of vanilla and strawberry wafts off her and fills the room with the tasty scent of desserts. 

Gunny throws his arm around Toner’s shoulders and squeezes him tightly, shaking him slightly, “Congratulations, you sonuva bitch!” He laughs. 

Sojourner presses a kiss onto Eggy’s sugary cheek, “We are so happy for you two!” She wraps her fuzzy arms around the confectioner’s neck, giving her a tight hug, “The wedding was lovely!”

Toner wraps his arm around Gunny and reaches over to squeeze Sojourner’s hand, “This wedding would’ve never happened without you, Mami!” He says as he rubs his thumb over her hand, “We would have never met if it weren’t for you.” Eggy and Gunny nod in agreement.

“I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for Chess.” Sojourner grins at her friends, “It’s really him you should thank, my loves.”

“Well, thank you, Chestah.” Eggy glances over to the marine with a sly smile, “I know we’ve known each other for a long time and we haven’t always seen eye ta eye, but becuzza you I got meet my Honey Bear.” She kisses two of her fingers and taps his moist, black nose. Gunny chuckles as he catches her hand and kisses it.

“Mi esposa tiene razón, amigo.” Toner agrees, looking over to his best friend, “If you hadn’t taken your van for me to paint, none of us would be together today.” The painter looks between his friends and the love of his afterlife and a lump forms in his throat, ahem “Listen,” Sniff. “Not to get all sentimental and shit,” He starts.

“We’ll give you a pass for today.” Gunny interrupts with a smirk.

“After the honeymoon, it’s straight roasting, dude.” Sojourner follows up with a snort.

“Callate, bastados!” Toner laughs as he fights back tears, “I’m trying to be real here for a sec!” 

The group share a laugh as Toner gathers himself, “I…I know I can never see mi familia again. There’s just no way mis padres would ever find themselves down here, I miss them everyday.” His friends’ faces fall slightly, all relating to the sad reality of their shared situation, “But, sniff, sniff. Even if Hell is truly my eternity,” A tear falls from his hollow eyes as his flames simmer to soft lavender, “I couldn’t ask for better people in my afterlife. And I know mi familia would’ve loved every single one of you. You are mi familia.” The group of friends pull together tightly for a hug, letting the embrace linger before Sojourner speaks.

“That was soft.” She whispers, Eggy lets out a loud snort before laughing.

“Hella soft, man.” Gunny agrees as his forehead presses into Toner’s luke-warm skull.

“¿Saben qué? ¡Que os jodan, chicos!” Toner laughs as he pushes everyone off him, “I was trying to have a moment!” He snaps playfully as he adjusts his turquoise bolo tie.

“Yeah, and it was hella soft. No shame.” Sojourner teases with a wide smile, her mismatched eyes glow with mischief, “We looooveee you!” She bats her lashes sweetly.

“Fuck off, Pooh Bear.” Toner pouts with his arms crossed.

“Aw, candlelight.” Eggy coos as she pulls her husband in for a kiss.

“No, no, don’t you candlelight me, suca.” Toner playfully grumbles as he allows his wife’s kisses to cover his face.

“My bright sparklah, don’t be grumpy.” Eggy nuzzles her pointed, strawberry flavored nose into Toner’s empty socket. Grinning, Gunny rolls his eyes and stands up, excusing himself from the table. Sojourner raises an eyebrow watching the marine head to the dj, he leans in and says something in his ear. The glowing sinner gives her friend a thumbs up as he makes his way to the makeshift stage, letting out a shaky breath.

‘Okay, Chess, no sweat. Just like you’ve been practicin’.’ He coaches himself as he approaches the microphone. 

‘What the hell is this guy doin’?’ Sojourner wonders as the music lowers and the dj’s voice takes over. 

“We have a very special gift for the bride and groom.” Jukebox announces, “If everyone on the dancefloor can please make way for the lovely couple?” The wedding guests clap and create a space on the dancefloor. Toner stands up and offers his hand to Eggy, helping her out of her chair and leading her to the center of the crowd. The newlyweds look up at Gunny with confused smiles on their faces.

“¿Qué pasa, perro?” Toner asks as he watches his best man shift nervously from side to side. Sojourner props an elbow on the table and rests her chin on her fist, still wondering what her wedding date was doing on stage with an amused smile.

Gunny nervously clears his throat before his deep voice grumbles out, “Tones, I couldn’t ask fer a better man to call my friend. Someone who called me out on all my shit and has helped me to become a better person, even when it made much more sense to call it quits on me.” Gunny clears his voice again, trying to not let his emotions get the better of him, “It’s an honor to be yer best man on the most important day of your afterlife and I can’t congratulate you enough on findin’ this crazy gal and hitchin’ yer wagon to hers.” Some guests raise their drinks in agreement, murmuring in support, “And while this ain’t, in any way, my strong suit, I hope you two like this little gift I put together. Sorry if I butcher some words.” The marine nods to Jukebox as a cue to start the music. A beautiful guitar intro fills the room as people hold on to their partners and begin to sway with the music. 

Sojourner’s eyes grow wide with surprise, ‘He’s going to sing?’ Her mouth drops open in shock.

Gunny closes his rich, green eyes and takes a breath, his deep bass voice sings out:

Bebe, anoche

Fue sin duda

La mejor noche

Solos tu y yo.

Toner’s and Eggy’s mouth drop out as the marine continues to sing. His deep voice melodically carrying each note through the song.

Entre esa botello de vino y esas miradas a mi

Y bailando en la oscuridad to’ la noche

Bien cerca de ti

Y yo se que esto no será suficiente

Pero no es vivir sin amandote

Toner feels his eyes well up with tears as his friend continues to sing. He turns to his wife and spins her around before pulling her close to slow dance. Eggy reaches up and wipes the tears off her husband’s face as she rests her head on his shoulder and closes her eyes.

Si yo nunca llego a ver las luces del norte

Si yo nunca llega a ver las la torre en Paris de noche

Si lo único que tengo

Es estar junto a ti

Amor, morire un hombre feliz

Sojourner stares in complete awe of Gunny, listening to his beautiful voice continue with the love song. She watches as he sways side-to-side with his eyes closed as he lets the music take over. His rich tone rumbles pleasantly at the low notes and sends shivers down her spine as he builds up to the chorus. Sojourner can’t help the tears that build up in her own eyes as she watches Toner and Eggy get lost in their own world, gently holding one another as they turn in slow circles. Green and red eyes drift back up to Gunny, who is also smiling down at the happy couple before locking eyes with her as he finishes the song. 

Si lo único que tengo

Es estar junto a ti

Amor, morire un hombre feliz

The song finishes off with a beautiful guitar chord, but Sojourner didn’t hear it. In all honesty, she didn’t even register that the wedding was clapping until Jukebox spoke up again, “What a beautiful tribute to the newlyweds! Chester Pultzer, everybody!” The crowd whoops and cheers as Gunny steps off the stage and into Toner’s tight embrace. Sojourner sees Gunny bury his cheek into Toner’s shoulder as the hug lingers between the two men. Eggy dabs her eyes with a soft, pink handkerchief before pulling Gunny down and planting a kiss on each of his cheeks. The music starts up again with another love ballad, ‘Be More’ by Stephen Sanchez. The lights dim to a romantic shade of pink as the soft piano intro begins.

Oh

It must be more than I need you

More than I love you

Be more than wishes on stars

High above you

Sojourner watches Toner and Eggy talk to Gunny before looking over their shoulders in her direction. She turns around to see what they're looking at, but only sees a wall covered in fairy lights. Turning back around, her friends are chuckling as Gunny smiles at the ground while shaking his head. Toner leans in and says something in Gunny’s ear before slapping him on the shoulder to push him towards their table.

If words could just hold you

Tell me you feel me

Oh, just to know you 

Tell me you see me

“Hey, gal.” Gunny greets as he approaches the table, there’s a smile on his face that Sojourner can’t quite place, “May I have this dance?” He offers his calloused hand to her. Sojourner looks at his hand then up to him and her heart does a stupid, has he always looked like that? She feels her face heat up and her lights surge brightly as she takes his hand, letting him guide her to the dance floor.

I couldn’t have said it

You must have just read it

In my eyes

Darling, please

Let it be more

Be more

Be more

Gunny spins Sojourner in before leaning down and slipping a hand around her curvy waist. His large hand holds hers while she reaches as high as she can up to his shoulder, the two begin to sway. Sojourner cranes her neck up to look up only to catch Gunny’s eyes. She immediately gets self-conscious and turns away, hearing him chuckle.

It must be more than I want you

More than I want to touch you

Be more than dancing in raindrops

Falling to touch you, woah, just to touch you, oh

The music swells to the bridge as Gunny spins her twice and leans her down for a dip, pulling a gasp out of the sailor. Laughing, he stands her back up and begins dancing again as the song builds to its climax.

If words could just hold you

Tell me you feel me

Oh, just to know you

Tell me you see me, yeah

Darling, be more

Be more

Be more

Sojourner looks back up at Gunny, his green eyes are closed as he allows himself to get lost in the melody. She rests her head on his brawny chest, nuzzling into him as she rests her ear over his heart. The rhythmic beat pulses against her cheek, lulling her eyes to slip close as she presses in more. A warmth fills her entire being as a smile spreads across her face, she finally has her friend back again.

If words could just hold you

Tell me you feel me

Oh, just to know you 

Tell me you see me

Gunny eyes snap open when a weight presses into his chest. He glances down and sees Sojourner nuzzling into him. His face heats up as he tries and miserably fails to keep his tail from wagging. ‘Fuckin’ thing! Stop!’ He looks around and notices Toner, Eggy, and a bunch of their mutual friends smiling and stifling giggles. A couple of painters make kissy faces at him. The marine mouths angrily at them to fuck off when Sojourner guides the hand she’s been holding to her lower back and wraps her arms around his broad chest in a tight hug, her eyes remain closed. 

I couldn’t have said it

You must have just read it

In my eyes

Darling, please

Let it be more

Sojourner breathes deep and smells the spice of his cologne, it’s faint. She presses her face in more, his chest is soft. Way too soft, what the hell? She opens her eyes and finds herself buried face deep into Chester’s marine green pillow. The sound of silence is deafening as she sits up in his bed. 

Everything is just how he left it, clothes still in the hamper, dusty books on the desk with his tan bomber jacket hanging off the chair. The room looks like he’ll be back any minute, like he just went downstairs to get some water. Who is she kidding? He’d never drink water, fish fuck in it.

Sojourner picks up her phone and looks at the time, 0514. She unlocks it, calls Dog Tits, and puts it on speaker. Chester’s phone rings, she lets it. His ringtone of ‘ Drunken Sailor’ plays until his voicemail picks up.

“Did it… did it beep yet? Shit! Hey, this is Chester Pultzer. I didn’t pick up the pho- fuck, hang on… I cain’t come to the phone right now. Text me cuz I don’t listen to voicetalk… The fuck is it called? Voicemail? Whatever, text me.” beep “ The mailbox for this number is full, goodbye.” ***

Sniff. Has it almost been a year already? It feels like the wedding just happened yesterday. Her feet were killing her as she fireman-carried Gunny’s gargantuan tanked ass up the stairs and tossed him on this very bed. He was in rare form that night, being a very lovey-drunk. Every other sentence was him proposing to her and her giving exasperated answers of ‘Yeah, sure, of course, and why not?’ as she wrestled his cowboy boots off his stupid dog feet. Sojourner looks over to the corner and sees the black boots in question, right next to his tan combat boots. 

Her heart squeezes painfully and she looks away, it still hurts too much. Did it hurt this much even when she found out about her mom and Aunt Jay? No, it didn’t. If anything, learning the truth gave her some much needed closure and reassured her that she wasn’t wrong about how much she still loved them. Sojourner can’t say the same about now. She has doubts and regrets, but most of all guilt.

‘All my fault.’ She thinks miserably as she lays her head back down onto her friend’s pillow, fighting back tears. 

“All my fault.”

 

Notes:

....yeah....

Chapter 37: Fair Winds

Summary:

It's that time again, extermination is upon Heaven's Deadliest. How will Vaggie, Adam, Lute, and Michael fair this time around. Will it be too much? Will lines be crossed?

TW: For violence, death, and gore.

Notes:

Hey yall, I'm give you guys three back to back chapters. It just didn't feel right dropping these particular three one week at a time. Enjoy getting spoiled!

Date: August 16, 2022

Age: A mixed bag

Location : The Pearly Gates

Weather: Brisk, bright, beautiful Sunny with 75℉°

Current Condition: Mentally gearing up for a wild ride

“Sir, we have intel from the ranks.” Third-in-Command exorcist, Lute, informs the First Man. Vaggie looks up from her whetstone, the tip of her spear glistening to a deadly point. 

Sluuuurp! BLECH! “Sweet. Alright, Danger Tits, let’s have it.” Adam lets out a rancid burp that stinks up the area, the women hold their bearing despite the disgusting smell.

Lute snaps to attention, “At the junction of the industrial district and downtown, there’s a small resistance movement.“ She looks at her notes, “For a few years now, they’ve retaliated with flashbangs and evasive maneuvers to try to interfere with exorcists during extermination. We don’t know how they’re mobilizing or how many there are, but they seem to be effective. Last year, over 20 exorcists were encountered and lost track of the sinners around them.”

Adam glares angrily, “The fuck? Why am I just now hearing about this?” He snaps as he slams his drinks down on the desk, “Why are you bitches waiting til it’s party-time to let me know?” He turns to Vaggie, “Did you know about this?”

Vaggie stares darkly at Lute, who has a sly grin on her face, “No, sir. This is new information to me.” She answers through gritted teeth, “This whole year, no one has brought this up to me, otherwise, I would have informed you right away.”

Adam rolls his eyes, “Ugh, whatever.” He sighs as he runs his hand down his face, “Okay, new set list, pffffft.” He blows a raspberry, mulling it over, “Lute, since you’re the one who brought this up, you, me and Bulldog are gonna smoke out this “resistance”,” Adam overly emphasizes his air quotes, “And take them out. Vagina George, you lead the troops and conduct business as per usual, got it?” The first man looks over his two top girls and they nod in compliance, “Hot shit, I’m gonna let Big Mike know the change in plans.” He stands up and places his guitar on its stand before stretching. Throwing up rocker hands, Adam turns and leaves the exorcists to their own devices.

“You know you should’ve reported to me.” Vaggie growls darkly at Lute.

Lute dons her helmet and pushes her forehead into Vaggie’s painfully, “As second-in-command, you should have known even without me reporting to you. Maybe you’re just getting sloppy.” She hisses.

Vaggie glowers as a deep seated hatred burns through her. It’s no secret that Lute has been trying to undermine Vaggie for years, gunning for her position. Over time, it seems Lute has been gaining support from the others, making Vaggie’s job more difficult than it already is. On top of being one of Adam’s favorites, in which such an “honor” isn’t really an honor at all, Vaggie would gladly step down and let someone else be second-in-command. Anyone, but Lute.

Adam struggles to open up a meat stick snack as he knocks on Michael’s door, “Fuckin’ flimsy wrapper. Suckin’ bitch, slippery-ass, plastic motherfu- Hey, bro!” Adam greets as the door opens to reveal Michael’s stoic face. The archangel is dressed in his blue and white holy tunic with his sword strapped to his side, black gloves tucked into the belt. 

“Adam.” Michael answers tiredly. Again, it seems like he didn’t get a lot of rest leading up to today, “The bugle isn’t for another 30 minutes.”

“Nah, man, ah know.” Adam replies as he resorts to biting the wrapper in order to free his snack, “Ah’ve got suhm intel f’hor ya. PFFT! ” He spits out a bit of plastic to the side.

Michael does not bother to hide his disgust at his companion’s poor manners, “Okay,” He leans against the door frame and crosses his arms, “What is it?” ‘Please let it be a message saying I don’t have to go anymore.’ He pleads silently to himself.

“So, ahparrently, pfffft. Danger Tits just told me that- Son. of. A. Clapped. Out. Whore!” Adam, now fully infuriated by the relentless plastic, throws the meat stick in anger. In the distance, Michael can hear a sharp “OW!”.

“ Lute told you…” Michael urges Adam on, already desperate to be done with this conversation.

Picking plastic out of the yellow teeth of his mask, Adam continues, “Yeah, you, me, and Danger Tits are gonna snuff out some small resistance that’s been fucking with the girls while they work.”

Sigh. “Her name is Lu- resistance?” Michael asks surprised, “There’s a resistance?” His heart rate begins to pick up. ‘Are they starting to rebel?’ His mind flashes to that day.

Maniacal laughter echoes through the skies as black and red storm clouds rage on. Dark figures and creatures surge, wave after wave of them in overwhelming forces. Michael’s arms burn with each swing of his flaming sword. His eyes sting as sweat and blood seep into his vision, partially blinding him. He can’t stop, any hesitation spells certain death for him. And if he dies, Heaven will-

“YO!” Adam calls as he waves his hands in Michael’s face, “Adam to Big Mike! You with me?” The first man looks at his friend with deep concern.

Michael looks around wildly and realizes he’s breathing fast and heavy, a trickle of sweat runs down his temple. With a shaky hand, he wipes his brow, suddenly feeling way too hot. 

“What the fuck man, you good?” When Michael doesn’t answer, Adam gently takes Michael by the shoulders and guides him to sit down at his desk. Ensuring that the archangel won’t keel over, Adam goes to the mini-fridge and grabs two cold waters out of it. Walking back to his friend, Adam frowns as he sees the distant look on Michael’s face. He cracks open one of the bottles and grabs a hand towel off of the shelf, pouring the cold liquid on it. Walking over, Adam picks up Michael’s hands and wraps the wet fabric over them, squeezing them in his.

The cold, wet towel shocks Michael back to the present with a gasp, he looks down and sees Adam kneeling in front of him, watching his face carefully. Michael clears his throat and looks away, “Sorry.” He mutters, embarrassed by his pitiful display of weakness.

“Shut up, man.” Adam replies as he removes his mask. Michael’s brows jump up in surprise, it’s been decades since he’s seen Adam’s true face, he has almost forgotten what the angel really looked like. Adam runs his fingers through his messy, chestnut hair before ruffling it around. He heaves a sigh as he places his fingers to his chin in thought, his golden eyes dart around as he nods to himself, “Yeah, I’m callin’ it.” He finally says.

“Huh?” Michael asks, confused by Adam’s words, “Calling what?”

“This, man, you. This is your last extermination.” Adam clarifies, looking up at him, “It’s not good for you, dude.” 

A lump forms in Michael’s throat, “A-Adam, tha- that’s not necessary! I can still perform my duties! I-” His anxiety spikes into overdrive at the dismissal, “I-I promise, this is a temporary setback, it’s not going to interfere with-” Tears of shame sting at his golden eyes.

Adam holds a pacifying hand up, “Woah, woah, woah! This isn’t a firing or nothing, chill!” Michael’s sudden outburst shocks him, “I’m just looking out for you, buddy! You did nothing wrong! You’re top executioner, best I’ve ever seen. But this is fucking with your head too much and that’s not good, man!” He squeezes Michael’s hands in his, “Breathe, dude. I need you to breathe.” Adam looks over Michael’s rigid form as the archangel’s breathing picks up again, “Come on, Mike. Stay with me, breathe.” He coaches as Michael fights to get his breathing under control.

‘He’s gotten worse, I’m gonna have to tell Raph.’ Adam thinks as he holds onto Michael’s hands. He thought he was doing Michael a favor by suggesting the warrior join him in the exterminations. Adam thought it would help Michael be less of a stick in the mud if he blew off some steam. It makes sense right? A fighter would do great in slaughtering demons, that’s what Michael is famous for. But, after getting to know Michael better, plus learning what his brother puts him through… 

Adam glances at the clock, 10 minutes until showtime, he fights off a grimace. Looking back up at Michael’s face, he sees the tears that line his golden eyes, “Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do. You’re gonna fly with me and Lute, but hang back. Do not swing your sword unless you seriously gotta. Can’t have you slippin’ while we’re in the shit.” Adam unwraps the soggy towel from Michael’s hands, “E-Day is only 4 hours long, so it’ll be over before you know it. We come home, clean up, have dinner, and talk to Raph. Sound like a plan?”

Michael stares at Adam wide-eyed, in their entire history together, he’s never seen this side of him. Caring, considerate, rational. The warrior mulls over the plan and slowly nods his head in agreement.

“Good shit.” Adam picks up Michael’s mask and hands it to him before pulling on his own. Michael runs his hands over the smooth metal of the face as the cold smile stares back at him. “You don’t have to keep that if you don’t want to.” Adam mutters as he looks away, “‘Specially if it really bothers you.”

Michael stands up and pulls on his gloves, “You made it for me right? Why would I get rid of it?” A wide grin spreads across Adam’s face as he hooks his arm around Michael’s shoulder.

“You’re something else, you know that?” The first man laughs while shaking his head, “I gotta go rally up the girls, be out there in five, alright?” Adam opens the door to leave.

“Adam?” Michael calls, causing him to halt.

“Yeah?” Adam looks over his shoulder to answer.

A warm smile sits on Michael’s angelic face that makes his tired eyes glisten, “Thank you.” He says softly.

Adam is beyond grateful he’s wearing his mask, his face flushes hot and gold underneath the black material as his words get caught in his throat. Ahem, AHHEEEM, cough. “Yeahsuremanwhatever, fuck!” He rambles out before abruptly leaving. ‘The fuck was that look just now?’ He tries to get his heart to slow down as he all but jogs back to his exorcists.

“Sir, a moment of your time?” Lute asks as he approaches.

“Yeah, what is it?” Adam answers in a flustered huff. Michael’s smile is burned into his mind, ‘Fuck, he’s hot.’

“The science division just dropped this off.” Lute holds up a box with yellow tape sealing it shut. The warning label reads: ‘Biochemical sample; handle with extreme caution’.

A wicked grin spreads across the black and yellow mask, “Oh, ho- ho, baby! Now we’re talkin’!” Adam slices open the package in Lute’s hands, undoes the clasp of the cooling container inside and reaches in. He slowly pulls out a small capsule of liquid, it gives off a radiant light and energy that both angels recognize all too well. 

Lute stares in awe, “Sir, is that-” 

“Sir, the troops are in formation and awaiting your call.” Vaggie approaches the duo from behind, spooking Adam and causing him to fumble the vial for a moment before clasping it in his hands.

“Shit, Vagitha Christie! Warn a guy, fuck!” Adam snaps angrily at her.

It takes all the self-control Vaggie has in her body to not roll her eyes, “Apologies, sir. It won’t happen aga-” She eyes the glowing vial and feels the holy presence, “Sir? What is that?” She asks curiously.

“None of your business!” Lute growls as her mask takes on a nasty expression.

“Girls, girls, shut up!” Adam soothes, “This sweet baby here,” He flourishes the vial, “Is Angelic Grace, well, in juice form. And, a sweet surprise for our demon friends downstairs.” He pulls out a de-armed grenade and loads the vial in the chamber before putting everything back together with not as much care as he should have. “Behold!” He holds up the weapon, “The Holy Hand Grenade of Team Live Badass!” He announces giddily. 

“Sir, why would we need a grena-” Vaggie starts to question.

“Holy Hand Grenade of Team Live Badass.” Adam interrupts.

‘I’m not fucking saying all that.’ She thinks tiredly, “Why would we need such a weapon?”

“Thank you for asking Vagin-ica Mars.” Adam says pleasantly, “As you hot bitches may know, demons don’t do so hot with anything Holy. In fact, it kinda eats them from the inside out, which sucks to suck, but anyway.” He tucks the grenade into the sleeve of his robes and begins walking to the troops, “While Grace gives a boost to angels, it weakens demons in the same way.” The exorcist leader grabs his guitar from his stand and slings it over his shoulder. “The science nerds are looking for ways to give winners a chance to have families up here, hence the Grace. It’s supposed to do some wild shit to their cells, but we don’t wanna experiment on our winners now, do we?”

Vaggie’s eyes widen, ‘He can’t be serious’ “Sir, I thought no one else was supposed to know about the extermination.” She whispers. 

Adam waves his hand, “Relax, relax, they don’t. All they know is that a small sample is going to be used in a case study and see if the sample will alter anything. Those nerds will work out the kinks later. See? We’re helping Heaven bring a brighter existence to the souls who deserve it!”

“Makes perfect sense, sir.” Lute agrees as she tucks her hands behind her back. She notices Vaggie’s silence and sneers, “Don’t you agree, Lieutenant?” She stretches out the ranks sarcastically.

‘This is sick, we’re already killing them. Isn’t that enough? Now, we’re nuking them?’ Vaggie pulls on her mask to conceal her true feelings, “It’ll be interesting to see, sir.” She avoids Lute’s taunt. ‘This is fucking wrong.’ She can’t seem to quash that feeling and remains silent as Lute and Adam hype up the girls. In the corner of her eyes, she notices that Lord Michael hasn’t moved an inch and remains in parade rest, just like her. 

‘Does he know?’ Vaggie wonders.

___________________

Hour 3 of Extermination Day- Cannibal Town District

Another sinner hits the ground dead as Vaggie retracts her spear from their chest. She turns towards an explosion not far from where she is, then another. She can see faint bursts of light in the direction of the blasts. ‘The resistance…’ She takes to the skies and flies to an old-fashioned themed part of town. Adam’s voice can be heard shouting orders, another explosion sends a herd of sinners out into the open. 

Vaggie descends upon a green skinned sinner with long burgundy hair, it’s over in an instant. Vaggie yanks her spear out of the dead girl’s back and catches a sinner darting down an alley. She chases it, raising her spear for her next kill when she suddenly stops. A frightened child with ink black eyes cowers in fear, his small frame paralyzed as he watches her next move.

She can’t do it. Sinner or not, Vaggie can’t bring herself to kill a child, what is a child doing down here anyway? “Go!” She whispers urgently, the child wastes no time and sprints, “Run, now!” She turns to watch the boy escape and sees Lute right behind her. She drops her spear in shock as her heart sinks into her stomach. Then, a searing hot pain strikes across her face.

___________________

Heaven- Extermination Day is over

That wasn’t right. What Michael just witnessed wasn’t right. His mind is blank as he steps in the bright light of Heaven’s sun. How could they do such a thing? The bell rang. The killing is supposed to stop strictly when the bell rings, but that didn’t happen. Adam and Lute didn’t obey. That sinner should still be alive right now. His lover shouldn’t be crying. What was that thing Adam threw before leaving? Michael felt a holy presence, but was off, muddied…. Contaminated.

“Mike?” The voice sounds far away, there’s an awful ringing in his ears. “Michael? Michael!” The ringing is getting louder. No, it’s not a ringing, it’s that sinner’s scream. It was pure pain, it was - “ MICHAEL! ” The voice breaks through clearly. The warrior angel looks up and sees Adam. The taller man is leaning down to be face level with him and is shaking his shoulders, “Mic-” He shoves Adam off of him and takes a step back from him.

“Why did you do that?” Michael’s voice sounds strained and tight.

“Do what?” Adam asks, confused. Lute peeks around his shoulder in concern.

“The bell… The bell rang, and you still killed them.” Michael clarifies in a deep monotone as he locks eyes with Lute, “You disobeyed.” His body goes rigid, his fingers twitch near his sword.

Adam’s eyes get huge as he sees the shift in Michael’s demeanor. He’s not just slipping anymore, it’s a dead drop. “Lute,” Adam says softly, moving to cut off Michael's view of her, “Get the girls out of here, now.” His voice leaves no room for any retort, “Tell him , level 5.”

Lute takes off with a single word, barking one single command to the troops. They all instantly fall silent and fly away. 

“Hey, man.” Adam speaks quietly, hoping to reach Michael, “It’s me, Adam. We’re friends, I’m your friend.”

‘Disobedience begets punishment.’ Azrael’s voice speaks loud and clear in Michael’s mind, “Disobedience begets punishment.” Michael’s level voice drones as he unsheathes his golden sword and it bursts into blue flames, “To disobey is to fall into damnation.” He raises his flaming sword towards Adam.

‘Oh my fuck.’ Dread fills Adam’s soul. He knows he doesn’t stand a chance against Michael, especially when he’s cracked out like this. He raises his hands, “Buddy, it’s okay. We didn’t do anything wrong.” Sharp, golden eyes cut to the object in Adam’s hand, a halo. Adam follows Michael’s gaze and his heart drops, he forgot he had the damned thing in his hand. “Mike, I-I can explain.”

“ You turned your weapon against our own people? ” A multitude of voices leave the archangel’s mouth, “ You would betray Heaven and Its creations?! ” The heat of Michael’s fighting spirit begins to cook the metal of Adam’s mask, searing his skin. 

“No, no! Sh-she was a traitor!” Adam scrambles for an answer, “She let a demon go free! She disobeyed and we had to punish her.” The fighting aura radiating off of Michael is suffocating, Adam doesn’t know how much longer he can stall. “Sh- she was wrong, Mike-” A flash of green blinds him. The force slams Adam onto the ground and knocks the wind out of his lungs. Groaning, he lifts his head and sees Raphael holding an unconscious Michael, his golden sword clatters to the ground, extinguishing.

“Adam! Are you alright?” Raphael gasps, winded himself. It took an insane amount of his power to suddenly put Michael under like that. “Can you stand up?”He asks as Gabriel lands next to him and immediately reaches for Michael. Raphael slaps the messenger’s hand away, “Don’t touch him!” The healer snaps, “If I lose concentration, he’ll wake up. He’s still fighting me even now!” Beads of sweat pearl on his tan skin. “He-help Adam.” Raphael grunts as his eyes glow an earthy green and holds his brother tighter. ‘Sleep, Michael.’ His gentle healing aura struggles against Michael’s stifling warrior. Raphael feels himself losing his grip, ‘You are safe, rest. Please.’  

Raphael’s breathing starts labor and his knees begin to buckle. Michael groans as his face grows fitful, he’s waking up. 

“ Michael!” Gabriel’s voice booms loudly, Adam throws his hands over his ears, “ Well done, Heaven is saved! Rejoice and be glad, for you have done well this day!” Michael’s face starts to relax and his body goes slack in Raphael’s arms, “Take comfort and rest .” Gabriel commands gently, sighing with relief when Michael finally falls asleep. Raphael collapses to the ground with his brother in his arms, heaving breaths and pouring sweat.

Adam lowers his hands as he stares at the sleeping angel, his heart is still slamming in his chest. He has never felt that kind of power before, it was suffocating, stifling, terrifying. 

It was fucking hot.

Notes:

Goddamn it Adam, seriously? You almost die and THAT'S your take away? Keep your head up Vaggie, help is on the way soon.

Chapter 38: Following Seas

Summary:

Sojo and Gunny prepare for another anniversary in the trench. They get some things off their chest and maybe grow closer than ever.

Notes:

Part 2 of my back-to-back-to-back chapter drop. I really enjoyed writing this one. A lot of lore drop for our veteran team! If you need a refresher on Rojas, go to chapter 17 Rosas Rojo

Date: August 15, 2022

Age : 3 Years Dead, turning 4 tomorrow

Location: Home

Weather: Summer Rain that turned into a blackout

Current Conditions: Last drink before sobering up for tomorrow

 

Sojourner polishes off her peach hard cider then picks up her knife to inspect the sharpness. She’s grateful she can glow in the dark, it comes in handy in times like these damn blackouts. The red and green position lights lining her arms and legs glow brightly to give Gunny a reference point back to the couch.

Thump! “SONUVA FUCK-STAINED SLUT!” He curses as he bumps into an ammo case full of bullets. Sojo looks in his direction and sees him limping back towards her, successfully finding the camping lantern.

“Why didn’t you turn the stupid light on?” Sojourner asks as he flops down next to her, bouncing her small body on the cushions.

The marine doesn’t answer right away, nursing his injured toes and grumbling hick curses under his breath, “Cuz shut yer gob that’s why, ya chew toy!” He snaps, embarrassed at the realization that he didn’t. 

“Aaww, poor doggy. Is him okay, sweetums?” She mocks in an overly sweet tone, “Does him need da nuggles?” She grabs Gunny’s face and smushes their cheeks together, cooing. The sailor laughs as a low growl rumbles from the marine’s chest. She can feel his lip twitching up to bare his teeth, making her laugh harder. “Oh stop it, you’re okay. Mwah! ” Sojourner plants a kiss on Gunny’s cheek and the growling instantly stops. Satisfied that her friend is okay, Sojourner sighs happily and turns on the lantern to finish prepping her gear.

Gunny can feel the kiss lingering on his cheek, she’s been doing things like that a lot more often now. Asking him to sit on the couch with her, resting her head on his chest and shoulders, hugging him. The kissing is relatively new and not flirtatious at all, but that doesn’t stop his heart from beating 10,000 pulses a minute whenever he gets one. Sojourner slides him his blade and the whetstone before picking up her dark lenses and polishing them. He grabs his knife and begins to sharpen it. 

Sccrreap, sccreap. Gunny pauses and looks over at Sojourner humming quietly to herself as she buffs out the scratches on her old cranial goggles. ‘Now’s the time.’ He thinks to himself, he feels his face heat up ‘Tell her. Just say “I love you”. And explain it to her dense self this time.’ Ahem. A rumble of thunder rolls in the distance outside right as Gunny clears his throat. The electrician doesn’t hear the attempt at her attention. ‘Fuck.’ Aheem! More thunder. ‘Fuckin…seriously?’ AHEEE- CRASH! BOOM! The loud clap of thunder makes Sojourner jump and look towards the front of the shop, away from Gunny. 

“Fuck you, thunder! Suck my red dick!” Gunny barks in the same direction. There is a howl of wind that sounds way too close to mocking laughter.

“Yeah, man! Get that fuckin’ thunder!” Sojourner encourages, raising her fist in support, “Thunder buddies for life!” She is completely serious and it sends Gunny into a fit of laughter. Sojourner snorts and joins in, it takes over a minute for the pair to simmer down. Gunny wipes a tear from his eye from laughing so hard while Sojourner sits herself back upright after having teetered over, giggling. 

Phew! Gunny sighs and leans back on the couch, closing his eyes. His pointed ears twitch as he feels the cushion next to him compress. ‘Here comes her head.’ The marine smiles to himself as Sojourner curls into his side and lays her head on his shoulder, heaving a sigh of content. The two sit quietly for a while, enjoying each other’s presence. 

“Hey, Squid.” Gunny’s deep voice finally breaks the silence.

“Hmm?” Sojourner replies, she sounds sleepy.

“I gotta tell ya somethin’.” Ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-thump.

The bear lifts her head to look at her best friend, “What’s up?” Her chin rests on his tricep.

Ba-thumpba-thumpba-thump! “I- uh, I’m…I” The German Shepherd stammers.

Sojourner’s eyebrows furrow in confusion, “You…” She sits up to properly look at him.

Gunny looks over to her and his mind goes blank. ‘Jus rip the fuckin’ band-aid off.’ “I’m… sorry.” Fucking damn it.

Green and red eyes widen in surprise, “Sorry? Since when do you apologize for growling? I know you’re not really upset.” Her confusion sets in deeper.

The marine sits up and turns toward her, a wary smile sits on his black muzzle. Laughing, he shakes his head and continues, “Not that, Squid. I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated ya. The van, the logo…ignoring you, the business…everything, gal.” He takes her hand in his, it’s so much smaller than his, “I’ve been a shit coworker, a shit roommate, a piss poor marine…and the shittest friend ya never deserved.” The remorse in his tone makes Sojourner’s heart sink. 

She sits quietly, taking in the apology. If she was being honest, she’s never received an apology like this before, and she didn’t even have to tell him to do so. Sojourner was more than content just having the old Gunny back, the past few months have been more than great, better than before. Why would she risk throwing anything off? What brought this on anyway?

“Why?” Sojourner finally asks, her gaze locks onto their hands. “Why did you do that?”

Gunny knew this question was coming, he can hear Toner and Eggy’s advice coming through, ‘be honest.’.

“I was under the impression that…” Gunny pauses, ‘Don’t word it like it’s her fault.’ “I thought…” He struggles with his words, getting flustered. Gunny feels his hand being squeezed gently, a thumb strokes the top of his hand. 

He looks at Sojourner’s face, deep concern and understanding sits on her features. ‘I can’t do it.’ He can’t say it, he can’t bring himself to admit that he fell in love with her then treated her like shit because he thought she rejected him. It’s not fair, it’s-

“It’s okay.” Sojourner says gently, “Tell me when you’re ready.”

Gunny lets out a whine as his ears drop to his head, “Sojo, no, you deserve an explanation.” He argues.

“And I’ll get it later, won’t I?” She counters with a sweet smile, “The important thing is that you’re sorry. I believe your apology.” Sojourner dips under his arm and gives him a tight hug, “I forgive you.”

He rests his chin on top of her braids and sighs, “I really don’t deserve it.” He mutters.

“Well, tough titties, cuz I think you do.” The sailor counters with a grin as her eyes slip closed, “Hate yourself on your own time.” Gunny snorts, his laugh bounces Sojourner’s head up and down.

“Hey, Sojo.”

“Yeah?”

“Why the hell are ya down here with the rest of us?” 

Sojourner’s eyes pop open, “Woooaahh, really?” She asks in bewilderment, “We doin’ this? Like for real- real, not for play-play?”

“For real-real, gal.” Gunny confirms as he tilts his head to look her in the face, “Let’s get deep fo’ a while.”

Sojourner stares at him and sits up, “Alright, man. Let’s get deep. The reason I’m in Hell is for…attempted murder.”

Gunny grins, “I figured it had somethin’ to do with that temper o’ yers.” A playful slap lands on his thick bicep, “What? Ya turn into somethin’ different when you’re hoppin’ mad, Squid.” He teases.

“You wanna hear the story or not, Mutt?” Sojourner huffs in faux annoyance.

“Course I do.” Gunny retorts.

“Then hush!” She shushes him, “For some context, remember Senior Chief Scabs?”

“The fat sonbitch ya flipped like a flapjack? Yeah, that story had me weak, I’ll tell you what.” Gunny smiles at the memory of Sojourner telling him how she threw the 260 pound man over her shoulder on the flight deck when he grabbed her for no reason. Flight boss and all the other higher ups laughed until they pissed themselves when they realized it was a small woman that did it. Scabs was moved off the flight deck because he had an issue of grabbing people unwarranted and abused his rank to get what he wanted. Ever since that humiliating incident, Scabs had his sights locked on Sojourner, swearing revenge.

Sojourner’s face falls, “And remember my junior, Rojas?” She asks quietly, looking away.

Gunny’s smile falters, “Yeah, I remember him, gal. They got somethin’ to do with each other?” 

The sailor nods, “It was Scabs that did it.”

“What the fuck?” Gunny’s jaw drops open, “How… how did you-”

“Rojas left me a note. It told the whole story and who did it. The assault, the video going viral, everything.” Her eyes narrow in anger, “I reported him and of course, the Navy did nothing!” She snarls, the lights on her body glow brightly. “In fact, the fucker was moved back upstairs to the flight deck, having served his ‘probation’. And he went right back to his bullshit, touching and grabbing people, just out of view of the cameras!”

Sojourner’s mind goes back to the day, “I was heading back to 412, on the fantail. Some of the birds had already started up. My baby sailor, Briggs, was looking over the jet for a plane captain rep and that’s when I saw him.” Her hands clench tightly into fists, “He was reaching for her and I sprinted. I was gonna throw him… throw ‘em right off the damn ship. I had his float coat and he had mine. Then, a jet taxied and went up on engines in our direction. Next thing I know, we were falling and I ended up here.” Sojourner looks up at Gunny with heat in her eyes, “And here’s the kicker, that fucker is still alive. He’s a vegetable that’s gone through the garbage disposal, but he’s alive. Eventually, he’ll come down here, and I’ll be waiting for him.”

Gunny mulls over her story, now her being down here really made no sense, she was protecting someone. It’s that pot-bellied pig of a E-8 deserved to go, not her. Another reason to believe Heaven is fulla shit in his opinion and whoever judges souls up there is a fuckin’ idjit. 

“Well, what about you?” Sojourner asks, “I gave my spiel, cough it up.”

The mechanic heaves a sigh and hopes to whoever counts as a rightful god, that Sojourner doesn’t judge him too harshly. “I got my Marines killed…” He confesses, “My story is similar to yers. Had a higher up that was a fuckin’ idjit and because his head was so far up his own ass, it got my closest buddy, Reaper, killed.”

“Was that really his name or just a nickname?” Sojourner asks, already fully engrossed in the story.

“Nah, gal. Reaper was his last name, Zeke Reaper.” Gunny explains with a smile.

“That’s a badass name.” Sojourner comments.

“That’s what we all thought too.” Gunny smiles as he remembers his battle buddy. “Reaper was the heartbeat of our group, the glue that held us together, the Polites to my Odysseus.” 

Sojourner’s mouth drops open at the reference and Gunny sneers, “What? A guy can’t enjoy reading epics from time to time?” She quickly closes her mouth and looks off to the side, saying nothing. Gunny chuckles and shakes his head before continuing his story, “Needless to say, Reaper dying messed us up bad. And just like Scabs, that wiry, little rat bastard had no remorse, that’s what put the idea in my head.”

“What idea?” Sojourner asks quietly, already figuring out where this was leading.

“Yer a smart cookie, Sojo. What did I do?” Gunny mutters as he looks away.

After a moment of silence, she answers, “You sabotaged his tank.”

“Bingo. I led my crew in fucking up his tank’s steering system and fuel pump. His tank was supposed to take up the rear, but at the last minute, he took the lead.” Gunny’s green eyes go distant as he remembers the day he died. “Hit an IED and caused a chain reaction. eight out of 14 tanks were gone, 32 Marines, 27 of them were innocent and it was all my fault.” 

He closes his eyes and leans forward to rest his elbows on his knees, “My crew and I get down here and start life over again. Then one-by-one, I lose my guys. Fuckin’ exorcists.” He takes a moment to grieve his friends. “Even found that sorry rat bastard skewered up after an extermination, and let me tell you what.” He lifts his head to look Sojourner in the eyes.

“Seeing him dead didn’t give me a single ounce of peace.” The marine confesses, “Not one.”

“Really?” Sojourner’s voice is small.

Gunny squeezes her hand and intertwines their fingers, “Let him go, gal. Let all of it go. Holdin’ onto that anger ain’t gon’ do ya no good, no how.” He looks down at the floor, “People come and go, even down here. Swear to me, you’ll keep being you and keep on living, regardless of who’s with you.”

“Only if you swear to do the same.” She counters. After a beat of silence, Gunny nods. “I, Sojourner Nayeli Knight, swear to be true to myself and keep living my life, regardless of who is with me.”

“I, Chester Oscar Pultzer, swear to be true to myself and keep living my life, regardless of who is with me.” 

A warmth radiates through their clasped hands and spreads throughout their bodies. It’s the same feeling as when they made their first oath. Gunny raises her hand to his lips and kisses it. “I love you, Sojo.”

“I love you, Chess.” She replies, looking into his green eyes.

The duo opt to sleep on the couch, Chester’s heavy arm holding Sojo against his chest with her ear placed over his heart.

Ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-thump.

Notes:

Well, well, well, guess emotional crap really is the old marine's forte. And Gunny finally told Sojo that he loves her. Now add "in" and "with" in that sentence and their good to go!

Chapter 39: Semper Fidelis

Summary:

It's extermination day in Hell and Gunny and Sojo continue to pay it forward.
TW: For violence, gore, and Character death

Notes:

Final part of my three chapter drop! Expect another three parter in later chapters! I'm so far ahead, I might make this a habit, otherwise it'll be who know how long until the entire story is posted!

Semper Fidelis is the US Marine mantra. It is latin meaning: Always Faithful.

Date: August 16, 2022

Age: 4th Death day

Location: On the streets near Cannibal Town

Weather: Unimportant

Current Conditions: 10 minutes left until Extermination is over

“Move, move, move!” Gunny barks as he ushers the last few sinners into the manhole, “Follow her!” He orders as he moves the cover back over the hole. 

Frightened sinners flail terrified in the dark when red and green lights appear out of nowhere, “Everyone, shut it!” Sojourner snarls. The sinners immediately fall quiet. “Single file, hand on the left shoulder of the person in front of you. If I move, you move. No one speaks, I need to hear what’s going on outside, let’s go!” Sojourner leads the denizens through the confusing maze of the underground. The glow of her body being the only beacon of light. After multiple twists and turns, they arrive at a ladder. “Up here is a warehouse, keep to the inner walls and follow the hallway all the way to the back. There is a yellow door, lift the handle up then down to gain entry. Do not speak, do not exit until 10 minutes after the final gong. Go!” She watches the last sinner climb up, closing the hatch behind them. 

“Devil-Dog, this is Grizzly.” Sojourner speaks into her radio’s mic.

“Go,” Gunny’s voice sounds winded.

“Package drop-off successful, moving to portal 8.” She reports as she begins to run.

“Portal 8, copy. ETA minus two.”

“Minus two, copy, over.” Sojourner looks at her phone and checks to see she is still on the fastest route to the agreed checkpoint. After positive confirmation, she slips her phone back into her pocket and picks up her pace. Arriving at portal 8, Sojourner radios again, “Devil-Dog to Grizzly, I have arrived at portal 8.” No response. “Devil-Dog to Grizzly, portal 8 arriving.” Silence. “Devil-Dog to Grizzly, respond or I will breach.” Static.

“Shit. SHIT!” Sojourner hisses, pulling her goggles down, she scrambles up the ladder. Grunting, she lifts the heavy metal plate up a few inches to see her surroundings. ‘Chester, where are you?!’ She tries not to panic as she scans the bloodied street. Suddenly, a tan helmet skids into view, it’s Gunny’s. The metal cover suddenly becomes light as Sojourner’s magnetism tosses it off and she climbs completely out. She grabs the cover and Gunny’s helmet, sprinting in the direction it came from. 

‘Where? Where are you?’ The sailor thinks to herself, ‘Calm down, panic gets people killed. Keep your head on a swivel and follow procedure.’ She soothes herself. A familiar deep voice grunts out, there’s a scuffle, someone’s fighting. Sojourner runs into the streets and sees Gunny backing up while snarling. Blood drips from his lips and his vest is hanging off him, his radio is smashed to pieces on the ground. A large exorcist with a black and yellow mask is stalking towards him with a… is that a fucking guitar?

“HIT THE DECK!” She screams as she uses her repel to fling the manhole cover like a frisbee at the angel. Gunny immediately drops and rolls to the left as the metal plate whizzes overhead, clipping the angel in the shoulder.

“OW, WHAT THE FUCK?!” The big angel roars, dropping his guitar to clutch his shoulder as the cover clatters next to Gunny. 

“Squid, behind you!” Gunny cries out, seeing an exorcist behind her lift a sword.

Sojourner turns around too late and the sword slashes her goggles in two, it’s the only thing that saves her vision as she dives away from her assailant. Using the momentum from her roll, Sojourner tackles the exorcist, using her repel ability to pin it down and put it in her guard. It moves too slowly to stop Sojourner’s heavy punches to its mask, unable to move its arms because of the increased gravity.

“Lute!” The large angel goes to rush to her aid, only to stumble when Gunny stabs his robe into the ground with his blade. When the angel turns to look down at what’s stopping him, Gunny takes the manhole cover and smashes upwards into his chin, knocking him down. As the angel lays on the ground, he sees the dog sinner stand over him and raise the cover above his head, about to bring the rim down onto his bent knee. 

CLANG! The cover flies out of the marine’s hands and clatters 30 feet away. Gunny looks up in shock, an angel with six blue and gold wings and a glowing blue mask hovers overhead. A sword engulfed in blue flames burns brightly in its hand, its clothes and skin untouched by the flames, “ENOUGH!” Its deep voice orders. Sojourner halts before her fist can land another blow, the atmosphere around her instantly saps any fight left in her. Lute sits up and pins her to the ground. She grabs her sword and raises it above her head. Sojourner lets out a sharp gasp as she freezes in place.

GOOONNG! GOOONNG! GOOONG! The clock tower rings out. Extermination day is over. Lute lowers her sword as anger burns through her, so close, so damn close. Sojourner scoots away and scrambles to her feet, her cut goggles dangle around her neck. Her mismatched eyes stare at Lute, but not with fear. ‘She’s not afraid of me?’ Lute realizes, indignation builds in her chest. ‘You dare not to be afraid of me?!’

Gunny runs to Sojourner, “Squid, are you alri-” The sound metal piercing flesh cuts through the air. He looks down to see Lute’s sword embedded in his chest. The exorcist yanks it out, spilling the sinner’s blood to the ground. Lute turns to Sojourner, smiling when she sees the abject horror on her face. The marine stumbles forward, his eyes wide as he struggles to speak.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Sojourner can’t hear her own voice. She can feel herself screaming and hot tears spring from her eyes. Her legs carry her to Gunny and her arms wrap around his torso. The heavy weight of his body strains her muscles and his warm blood wets her face as she lowers them to their knees. Sojourner is scared, she doesn’t know what to do, he’s bleeding so much. 

“Gunny! GUNNY! It’s gonna be okay! I can fix this!” She rambles as she presses her hand to the gushing wound. “You’re fine! Hic You’re okay… you’re…Chester?” Looking up at his face, there’s a small smile present as his eyelids lower. Shaking, Chester leans down and kisses her lips, the vision of him is so blurry. “Chess…pl-please.” She begs as he rests his chin on her shoulder.

“I’m a… happy man, gal.” He whispers. A small breath passes, he’s gone. Sojourner stares in shock, holding Gunny’s lifeless body in her embrace.

This isn’t right. They did it, they survived another extermination, it’s time to go home. Now, Gunny is supposed to say, “Good ‘nuff fo’ gov’ment work!” and then she replies, “Good ‘nuff fo’ me!” Next, they call Toner and Eggy to let them know they’re okay, get cussed out by them in both jersey and Spanish then end the day with a barbeque at the paint shop. She has to be sleeping, this must be a dream. Sojourner’s ready to wake up from this nightmare now.

“Hey bitch!” A voice calls from above. She looks up at the large angel with gold wings, “How’s this for a resistance?” He asks as he tosses an object down at her. Wait, is that-

“GRENADE!” Sojourner screams and braces for impact. The last thing she sees is a bright flash of gold light, then darkness.

___________

???, ????, Streets of Hell

Sojourner groans as she slowly opens her eyes to see the darkened red sky. The heavy scent of blood reeks everywhere, clogging her senses. She goes to sit up only to realize oversized clothes drape over her. Sitting up fully, she inspects the very familiar garments. ‘This is Gunny’s vest and these are his duds!’ She holds them out in front of her, shocked to see it all stained red, “Why is it covered in blood? Gunny!” The sailor looks around frantically, “Chess, where-” She stops as the memory from earlier today comes flooding back. Chester was stabbed and then those angels threw a grenade at them. It must’ve knocked her out, but that still doesn’t explain where Chester went, he was far too injured to move. 

“No.” Sojourner says to herself as she lowers his vest, “He wasn’t just injured…”  Chnnk, clink! She looks down and picks up the small object that fell, it’s a pair of dog-tags. Chester Oscar Pulitzer, United States Marine Corps, DOB: 13 October, 1971. Tears pour out of Sojourner’s eyes and run down her face, “He died.” She hugs his clothes to her body and cries. Her best friend is dead.

___________

1200,  August 23, 2022, Tone-Death Paint Shop

Sojourner sits on the edge of the bed, staring at the wall. She’s wearing her old flight deck uniform, it was the closest thing she has to a proper military uniform and what she was wearing the day she met…him. Hot Mic sighs sadly as she twiddles his dog-tags around her neck, zzzt, zzzzt, zzzt.  

The door opens and Eggy walks in. Her usually pink fondant skin has been a greyish- blue ever since she and her husband got the news about their fallen friend. They insisted that Sojourner stay with them for a while at the paint shop, deciding it wasn’t good for her to be alone right now. They were right. She kneels in front of Sojourner and gently touches her knee to get her attention.

“Honey bear,” The pastry chef calls softly, “It’s time to come downstairs, we’re ready.” Sojourner lets Eggy guide her downstairs to the front of the paintshop. As the women step into the bright sunlight, Sojourner is taken aback by a huge crowd. There’s at least 120 people standing in formation, each with a cosmos or marigold in their hands. 

Sojourner looks at Eggy confused, “Wh-what’s going on?” She stammers as Toner walks up to her. “Who are all these people?” The painter hooks his arm through hers and leads her to the front. 

“We sent a word out, anyone who met certain conditions was encouraged to attend today to honor Chester.” Toner explains, gesturing his free arm to the massive crowd.

“Conditions? What conditions?” Sojourner asks, confused.

A falcon sinner with piercing amber eyes and a strong build strides up to Sojourner, rendering a salute. “Master Sergeant William J. Russell, United States Air Force. Ma’am, please allow me, on behalf of every citizen here, to thank you and Master Gunnery Sergeant Pultzer for saving our lives during extermination.”

Sojourner’s jaw drops, everyone here was rescued from extermination? Wide green and red eyes scan the crowd as denizens of Hell all look back at her. Some smiling, some very emotional, others nodding as applause breaks out. She looks back to Russell and returns his salute. “It would be my sincerest privilege to lead the funeral honors for our fallen brother.” Tears line Sojourner’s eyes as she nods, unable to say anything. 

Eggy and Toner lead Sojourner to a line of chairs where the other painters were seated. Two beautiful portraits of Chester and a human man sit on easels with a gorgeous wreath of marigold and cosmos in between them. She pauses and stares at the human, he has a short beard with a headful of dark brown hair. It’s shaven close to his head leading up to thick wavy hair up top. His nose is wide with multiple lumps on the bridge like it had been broken many times before. Plump peach lips stand out against the tan of his skin. A bright, jolly smile reveals a full set of teeth save for one missing top incisor. The smile continues up to his beautiful, green… 

Sojourner touches the man’s face, “Is this what you looked like?” She asks, waiting for him to answer back, he doesn’t. “Wow, you were not that ugly.” She laughs, hoping to hear a retort, nothing. She hangs her head, “C’mon man, say something back to me.” She begs to herself, knowing he can’t answer back. A hand touches her shoulder, she turns to see Toner, his flames a depressing blue as tears run down his face. Placing her hand over his, she smiles sadly, turning to the rest of the paint crew, “He looks beautiful, guys.” 

“You know he’d tan your hide if he heard you call him that.” Byson laughs, the crew breaks into quiet laughter, Sojourner joins in.

“I’ll watch myself.” She jokes and sits in the middle between Toner and Eggy.

Russell calls attention to six other sinners and begins the funeral honors. They post colors, render the gun salute, and fold up the flag, holding for roll call. Sojourner hates roll call the most.

“Lieutenant Commander Penny!”

“Present!” She answers.

“Technical Sergeant Wirthers!”

“Present!” He answers.

“Master Gunnery Sergeant Pultzer.”

Silence. 

“Master Gunnery Sergeant Chester Pultzer.”

Sojourner breath catches, she can do this. She can do this.

“Master Gunnery Sergeant Chester Oscar Pultzer.”

He doesn’t answer back. 

 

Taps begins to play, it’s still the saddest song she’s ever heard. 

Sojourner can do this. She…can..t

Penny turns over the flag to Russell, who makes a right face to Sojourner and begins to walk.

“God…please, no.” The sailor begs, “Please, hic please, God, give him back to me.” Tears cascade down the dark brown fur on her face. Eggy lowers her head onto Sojourner’s shoulder, tears steadily fall. Toner holds onto her, fighting his sobs.

Russell kneels before Sojourner, she shakes her head and begins to sob. The veteran takes a deep breath, then speaks, “Ma’am, this flag is presented on be-behalf of a grateful nation, as an ex- ahem expression of our appreciation for the honorable and faithful service provided by your loved one.” The flag is pressed into Sojourner’s hands and she holds it to her chest, weeping. Russell stands back up, renders her a salute and turns about face to rejoin the Honor Guard. A tear slides down his face as he hears Sojourner’s cries. He’s done dozens of military funerals.

This one is definitely the hardest. 

Notes:

I am so sorry everyone. Believe me I CRIED the moment I typed when Sojo lost him. I was sobbing, ask VixenVenus she was with me when I wrote it. Being in the Navy, I unfortunately have been to many a military funeral. The absolute worst part for me is definitely the roll call.

Roll call: Everyone service member is called to attention, the five service member that had the closest bond to the dearly departed have their name and rank called, to which they answer present. The last person to be call is the departed service member. The first call is their rank and last name, second call is rank, first name, and last name. The final call is rank and full name, acknowledging that they are no longer with us.

That silence is the most gut wrenching sound I will ever here and now I'm crying just thinking about it. Cherish your loved ones voices, you never know how loud it is when they can't answer back anymore.

Again, I'm sorry for this chapter, I truly love my devil dog.

Semper Fidelis, Gunny.

Chapter 40: Hey, Stranger

Summary:

Vaggie is now a fallen angel. Gravely injured and alone, how will she fair in the harsh environment of Hell?

Notes:

Yo, I am so tired of being sick and sick of being tired. Hopefully, I'll get through this soon, cause...ugh!

Date: August 16, 2022

Age: 23 years old

Location: An dirty alleyway in Hell

Weather: Is this really important? Like, be for real, we sad right now.

Current Conditions: God, Lute is a bitch. Losing an eye sucks total ass.

 

Huff…huff . Vaggie doesn’t know which is worse, the pain in her back, her eye, or the reality that she is now a fallen angel. She can’t pinpoint exactly where the pain is coming from on her body. It hurts fucking everywhere.

‘Take it off… gotta get rid of it.’ Shaky hands pull off the gold-stained armor, being as careful as possible not to agitate her back or eye wounds further. The air is sweltering, or is it? Maybe her eye is already infected. ‘So dizzy…hurts so much.’ The chainmail lands heavily in the garbage, FWUMP! Vaggie doesn’t have enough strength to bury it further, she can barely stand as she is now.

“Safe…Need to find shel-” The injured girl collapses next to a filthy dumpster and passes out. ‘I’m going to die here.’ Vaggie thinks miserably to herself. How could this have happened? That sinner was a child, she could never willingly harm a child. What could that kid possibly have done to deserve such a fate anyways? 

The former exorcist heaves a sigh. If someone up there is still looking out for her, maybe they’ll send someone to come finish what Lute started. A shadow looms over Vaggie, she opens her eye and looks into bright, glowing red ones. ‘Please, just make it quick.’

The figure gets closer, a young woman with porcelain skin and rosy cheeks comes into view. She looks upset.

‘You’re beautiful. ’ Vaggie thinks as she watches the woman pull out a bandage and wrap her eye. Her hands are so gentle and cool against her heated skin. A tired smile spreads across Vaggie’s face as she takes in the woman’s image. She is the most beautiful thing the angel has ever seen.

Charlie notices the girl’s smile and her heart skips a beat. Bashfully, she brushes her blonde hair away from her face. “My name is Charlie, can you stand?” She asks gently, holding the sinner’s elbows. Vaggie tries, searing hot pain shoots through her and she cries out, collapsing against the dumpster again. “Okay, okay! Shhh, it’s going to be alright, I’ve got you!” Charlie soothes, inwardly panicking at the woman’s pain. “I’m going to pick you up, okay? I’ll be as careful as I can.”

The exorcist whimpers as Charlie’s arms slide onto the low of her back and underneath her knees. Shaky arms hook around her long, alabaster neck, taking in a shuddering breath before she’s lifted up. The angel can’t help but cry out again as her body screams in pain, instinctively hugging Charlie tighter.

“I know, I’m sorry! That’s the worst of it, I promise! Shhh.” Charlie hushes as she does her best to walk as carefully as she can without jouseling the poor thing. “I’m gonna take you home and take care of you. Don’t worry.” 

Vaggie doesn’t understand, who is this girl? Why isn’t she attacking her? Isn’t she a demon? She can’t figure it out and right now, she truly doesn’t care. Vaggie lays her heavy head on Charlie’s shoulder and allows sleep to take her.

Charlie makes the long trek back to the hotel. This girl is the only sinner she was able to find alive in this district, everyone else was…well, she was the only one alive. As the princess passes by Cannibal Town, a little boy runs past her and jumps into the arms of his parents. The family collapses in a heap of tears and kisses, saying how much they love each other. 

Watching the scene forces Charlie to fight back tears, what she would give for her citizens to never have to worry about extermination ever again. What she would give to ensure the safety and comfort of her sinners. She’d give everything…to see her mom again. She  can’t believe it’s been over four years already since she woke up and her mother’s presence was gone. Whatever her mom was doing, Charlie knows it’s something extremely important. She only wishes to know when she can hold her mother again. Hopefully, it won't be for much longer. ‘I’ll do my best, mom.’ She thinks determinedly and continues home.

__________

Happy Hotel, August 17, 2022, 1847

Vaggie opens her eye and looks around. She’s lying in bed in a room with tattered curtains and a big hole in the wall that shows the beams and insulation. There’s a broken dresser with only three out of the six drawers sitting askew in the corner and a scratched up desk with a cheap light sits along the left wall. A couch with worn cushions with a rusty metal spring sticks out from under the frame, a rough thin blanket and a dirty pillow lay across it.

‘Where am I?’ Vaggie wonders as she sits up. A painful throb dances across her shoulder blades, ‘My wings…’ She reaches across her chest to touch her wounds, deep scar tissues are grazed against her finger tips. “At least I’m not bleeding anymore.” She mutters as her hand drops to her lap. The door to the bedroom opens.

“Careful guys, don’t wake her up.” A sweet voice whispers. “Don’t be lo-” BANG! “ OW, FUCK!” Charlie curses as she hits her funny bone against the door, almost dropping the tray of food she’s carrying. The dishware rattles loudly as the tiny flower vase falls to the floor. “WHOOP! No, no, no!” The clumsy woman tries to catch the case with her foot and flings her shoe off, smacking it loudly against the ceiling, the vase breaks on the floor.

The royal freezes at the complete chaos that just unfolded, balancing on one foot. “Do you think she heard that?” She whispers to Razzle and Dazzle who hover in place with vacant fish-eyed looks.

Snort! “Hahaha-” Vaggie covers her mouth with her hands. It doesn’t do anything to stifle her belly laugh, that was so cute. Tears spring to her eye as she struggles to catch her breath. “Hahahahaha!” She slaps her knee and holds her sides.

Charlie’s rosy cheeks become beet-red with embarrassment as she looks away. She was hoping to make a much better first impression than this silly display. “Uuuhh, heh, sorry.” She laughs nervously, hopping on one foot to the bed making Vaggie laugh harder. The angel topples over to the side, she’s never laughed this hard in her life.

The princess tries to hold back a smile, then she starts to giggle, finally breaking down laughing as she approaches the bed and takes a seat. The girls take a minute to gather themselves, sighing at the same time when they finally calm down.

“How are you feeling?” Charlie asks, her smile is bright in her red eyes.

“Heehee, I’m still very sore. And my eye…” Vaggie trails off, her mood instantly saddens.

Charlie frowns and gently touches her cheek, looking over the bandages. “It’s not infected, we got you some medicine in time.” She hesitates to say more, “I’m sorry, the doctor said they can’t restore your eye.”

‘Her hand is so soft.’ Vaggie closes her eye and turns into her hand. “I know, it’s alright. Thank you so much for saving me.” She looks at Charlie and smiles softly.

Charlie gulps loudly, ‘Holy fuck, she’s gorgeous!’ She panics as she feels her face heating up, ‘Be cool, Charlie. Ask for her name.’ She takes a deep breath, “You’re so beautiful! Will you go on a date with me?” The princess blurts out loudly. She slaps her hand over her mouth, ‘No way you just did that! What happened to being cool!?’

Vaggie stares at her with an unreadable expression, she looks as shocked as Charlie is.

“I-I-I mean, what’s your name? I’m Charlie! Date me? What’s your Charlie?” The demon princess word-vomits, her blush crawls down to her neck as she rambles.

“My name is Vaggie.” The angel cuts her off, grabbing her hand, “I would love to go on a date with you.”

Who needs wings anyway?

Notes:

I pray we get a full meet cute of Charlie and Vaggie in season 2. I love them as character and as a couple so much!

Chapter 41: Tread Lightly

Summary:

Charles is allowed to be back in his children's lives but with very strict limits. He needs to play his cards right if he wants to keep what little he has.
TW: Homophobia

Notes:

Hey, y'all I'm so far ahead I'm just gonna post two to three chapters a week until I'm ten chapters out. I hope y'all are enjoying the story! We're almost at 3k hits! How crazy is that?!

Date: June 13, 2023

Age: 24 years old, today

Location: Greensboro, NC

Weather: 78*F and partly cloudy

Current Conditions: Trying to keep Harmony’s Birthday Party pleasant

 

“Okay, Cha-Cha, last gift!” Queen announces, handing over a small-medium sized bag.

“Tank you, Queenie!” Harmony sings as she places the gift on her lap and pulls out the card. Her name is spelled in pink, glittery ink and the envelope is covered in stickers. “Oooooh, I know who this is from.” She eyeballs her best friend, Alani, who blows her a kiss.

The flash of the Matthias’s camera snaps as Harmony opens the card, it’s a beautiful handwritten note with a watercolor painting of sunflowers inside of ballet shoes on the front.

“Wow, Lani, did you paint that?” Aura asks, tilting her head to see the front of the card. Her two-year old daughter, Nayeli, fights to get off her mother’s lap to get into the gifts. Aura bounces her knees to soothe the fussy toddler.

“Maaaaybe,” Alani teases, twirling her jet black locks around her brown fingers, eager for Harmony to open her present. The lady of the hour pulls the tissue paper off the gift and tosses them playfully over her niece, making her giggle.

A soft pink, handwoven shawl tumbles to full length as Harmony stands to admire the beautiful garment, “Oh, La-La,” The dancer breathes, instantly draping it over her strong shoulders, “It’s perfect.”

The Knight siblings all marvel at the incredible handiwork of the Native American woman. Matthias snaps another picture as Harmony pulls Alani into a tight hug, both women smiling brightly at the camera, “Thank you, babe.” Harmony plants a kiss on the young woman’s lips, both of them freezing. The room falls silent, the youngest Knight laughs bashfully, “Surpriiiise, La-La and I are dating…” She looks nervously around the room.

“Called it! Tide, you and Dezzi owe me $20 each!” Elijah boasts as he holds his newborn son, Antonio, in one arm and his free hand out.

“Wait, you were betting on me and Harmony?!” Alani gasps, her dark tan skin flushing a pretty shade of red.

“We were betting which one of you would blow your cover first and I won!” Elijah grins, gently bouncing his baby. He laughs as Alani sticks her tongue out at him.

“So, you guys don’t have a problem with… us?” Harmony asks, looking at all her siblings as she grabs her girlfriend’s hand.

“Are you two going to take care of one another?” Dezzi’s husband, Lawrence, asks.

“Yes.” Both women answer at the same time.

“You two gonna treat each other with respect and dignity, handling problems together as a team?” Dezzi asks, rubbing her pregnant belly and smiling.

“Yes, of course.” They clamor.

“Will you trust and choose each other?” Aura asks as she slides Nyeli down her leg to play in the wrapping paper.

Harmony and Alani wrap their arms around each other, looking deep into each other's eyes, “We will.” They say in unison.

“Then I’m satisfied.” Elijah confirms, giving his blessing. His family all speak in agreement. 

“I’m satified on one condition.” Matthias says sternly, walking up and looking Alani dead in the eye. The Native looks at him inquisitively as does the rest of his family. The youngest son clears his throat dramatically. “I get a shawl, too. That looks so comfy!” 

Alani snorts and pushes him away playfully, “Fine, but that counts as my dowry.” She agrees. Queen bops Matthias in the head with a pillow, calling him a bucket head. The group starting teasing each other and starting their own conversation, Harmony, however, remains quiet.

Her light brown eyes slide over to her father, Charles, who sits quietly in the armchair. It has been a tense few years since Harmony decided to reconnect to her dad. She and her siblings talked for hours about the pros and cons of possibly going limited contact with their dad and Xenia, before deciding to let them back in with a huge amount of boundaries in place. Harmony never felt completely at ease with her parents, especially since that incident where Queen got her scar. She was only a little kid when Dezzi took her and Matthias out of the house when Queen and Sojo started yelling. It was scary, she never heard that voice come out of her sisters before, it was like they were different people. A very, very angry people.

“Dad?” Harmony asks, in a light tone. She isn’t sure why she needs his reaction, but she does. 

Hearing his youngest daughter call for him shakes Charles out of his stupor. The older man looks around the room and all eyes are on him, waiting, testing. He looks at Harmony and Alani, why did it have to be like this? This is something he doesn’t understand, let alone support. Why can’t his children be easy for once? Normal for once? It’s all because of her, Sojo. If she were here… Who was he kidding? She would approve of this nonsense and dare him and Xenia to say anything different. Why did all of his kids have to change? What went wrong?

Ahem. “Sorry baby, I was dozing off in this comfy chair!” He laughs as he stretches, “You two make a beautiful couple.” The retired agent gives the young women his best smile as he stands up. “Just be good to each other, that’s all this old man asks for.” Charles wraps his arms around his youngest daughter and plants a kiss on top of her head. He pulls Alani into the hug and squeezes them both, making them squeak and giggle. The tension in the room vanishes as the older siblings relax, their stares softening. 

His stomach turns, what is wrong with his kids? Best not to think about it now, not if he wants to see his grandchildren and attend anymore gatherings. Charles flops back down on the armchair, watching his legacy go to tarnishes. 

Notes:

Ugh, Charles. How long can he keep his thoughts to himself? Also Aura and Elijah have little ones! They gave Sojo's middle name to their daughter in honor of the late Knight sibling. They named their newborn son, Antonio in honor of their adoptive brother Antonio who Sojo brought into their lives, but gone too soon.

Chapter 42: Refreshing

Summary:

This the last chapter of the week! I'll update in another five days!

Notes:

Fun fact about Sojo: She has an attuned ear for sound, whether it's music, machines, or languages, she prefers audio over visual. She loves to speak different languages, so far she's fluent in Spanish, proficient in Mandarin Chinese, and amatuer in French and Japanese.

 

Date: December 19, 2023

Age:  5 years dead

Location: Downtown Imp City

Weather: Sleeting acid, this shit is acidic

Current conditions: Leaving the department store with some groceries and four new customers

 

“Ow, ow, ow!” Sojourner hisses as she runs through the parking lot to her van. The stinging sleet hits her muzzle and sensitive black nose as she flings open the trunk and places her purchases in the cubby holes for the ride. “Fuck, this sucks!” She grouches, closing the doors and jogging to the driver’s seat. When reaching for the handle, she hears an engine struggle to turn over.

“Satan’s raw, red asshole!” A sharp voice curses, “Fuckin’ work ya piece’o ass!” The engine kicks a few times then dies. “Damn it!” Sojo turns and sees a rather tall imp with long black and white horns kick a van with a similar build to hers. The frustrated imp opens the hood and starts punching the engine, “C’mon, I cannot miss this appointment, she's waiting for me!” His forehead thunks against the chassis in defeat.

“Need some help?” Sojourner calls over, “I can take a look at it.”

The imp lifts his head in her direction, the poor guy looks like he could use a win. “Fuckin’ thing won’t turn over.” He grumbles, as the bear walks over. She hops on the bumper to get a good look at the engine. It’s old as fuck, but she can tell that’s not the issue. With the way it was almost turning over, it’s probably a fuse or something is loose.

“Your air hose is off.” Clunk! The electrician reconnects the loose duct, “Try it now.” She instructs, hopping off. The imp jumps in the driver’s seat and the engine turns over with no issue, a bright smile springs to his face. Sojourner claps her hands in celebration and closes the hood, smiling at the driver. 

He rolls down his window and sticks his head out, “You’re a fuckin’ lifesaver! What’s your name?” He sticks out his hand. 

“I’m Sojourner.” The sailor introduces herself, “What’s yours?” She shakes his hand with a smile.

“I’m Blitzø, the ‘O’ is silent. Thanks for the help!”

“If you need anything else fixed,” She reaches into her coat pocket, “Just hit me up!” The Devil’s Dogs business card is placed in Blitzø’s hand.

“I’ll definitely keep that in mind, Sigourney!”

“Sojourn-” The bear starts to correct.

“I gotta go pick up my new daughter, byyyyyeee!” He peels out of the parking lot, narrowly missing a shopper on crutches.

Sojourner unclenches her body once she knows the injured shopper is okay. Climbing into her van, she turns on the car and drives off. If the weather persists, she may have to reschedule a few jobs for when it’s better.

——————

1643, Uptown; Tinker, Tailor, Sewing Spy- Tailor and Garment Repairs, Uptown District

“Okay, last job of the day.” Sojourner says to herself as she and Hot Mic exit the van and arm it. She walks up to the tailor shop and enters, “Hello? Devil Dog’s Repairs.” She gently announces herself in the posh environment. A rich, mahogany counter sits in the center of the shop. There’s a lush sitting area with tea, coffee, and various deluxe refreshments that sit on the adorable coffee table, surrounded by three plush velvet armchairs. Smooth jazz plays on over the speakers, or at least it tries to, the sound is intermittent. 

The velvet red curtain behind the counter pushes back, a hedgehog sinner with a lavender pin cushion for a body and metal needles for spines walks to the front.

“Ah, bonne soirée, my dear, welcome. My name is Vera, I believe we spoke on ze phone, no?” Her French accent is quaint and adds to the atmosphere.

“Oui. Mon nom est Sojourner.” The sailor answers in French.

“Oh, parles-tu français?” Vera asks excitedly.

“Seulement un peu.” Sojourner answers, pinching her fingers together, “Mon ami m’ apprenait.” Her hand drops to her side. “I didn’t get a lot of practice before I died.” She laughs.

“Je comprends.” The tailor nods, “Suis-moi.” She beckons the electrician with her manicured fingers. Sojourner follows Vera to a back room filled with clothes. Her sewing room is a warm tangerine color with ruby red molding. The dark cherry wood flooring complements the row of dressers and mannequins that line the wall, each with an intricate article of clothing on.

“So, the sound system needs repairing and what else, madam?” Sojourner inquires looking around the beautiful room.

“Well, everytime more than one sewing machine runs at a time,” The seamstress prompts, gesturing for Sojourner to sit down at a machine. She nods and they both press their pedals. Fwoooom . The sewing room goes dark, “Zis irritating zing ‘appens.” Vera sighs as she flips on her phone light. “We can’t get any work done, so I must send everyone ‘ome.”

Sojourner lights up, illuminating the dark space. “Looks like your circuit is overburdened, shouldn’t be too bad of a fix.” She stands up, “May I see your fuse box, please?”

“Bien sûr, de cette façon.” The Frenchwoman leads Sojourner to a small closet in the very back room. “C’est ici.” She flourishes and steps aside to let the bear through.

“Cool, lemme just verify you signed our agreement.” Sojourner pulls out her tablet and taps the screen, confirming Vera’s signature for the repairs. “Alright, I’ll get started!” She grins at the seamstress.

“Bien, merci!” Vera leaves Sojourner to her work. The sailor throws in her earbuds and gets started. It’s exactly as she called it, whoever “repaired” this last was banking on it failing again. There’s about $1.23 in pennies shoved in the fuse box just begging for an electrical fire to start.

Within the hour, all systems are safely fixed and operating as normal. Sojourner takes out her earbuds and heads back out to the front. “Madam Vera? I’m all done.” The electrician calls out, moving the curtain out of the way, the owner is not in the shop. “Madam Vera?”

“She hath retired to her homestead for a moment. She shall return.” A dark voice with a hissing undertone speaks. A large shadow rises from the floor, morphing into an insanely tall gentleman with a black cloak and top hat, a neon green spider clasp adorns his chest. Four green, glowing eyes and a crooked grin leer down over the small bear.

Sojourner keeps her face neutral to hide the utter terror she feels. Nodding politely, she replies, “Thank you, sir. Please pardon my shouting, I wasn’t aware anyone was visiting.” She gives a small smile and folds her hands in front of her. The man may be a giant spider, but Sojourner knows an elder when she hears one.

“Worry not, child. Thou hast not disturbed my peace.” The man coos, refreshed by her politeness, “Pray, what is thou name, dear girl?”

Sojourner steps forward and offers her hand, “My name is Sojourner.” She answers calmly. “May I please ask yours?”

‘A well raised child indeed!’ A long black hand breaks the seam of the cloak and reveals neon green cloth with a red spiderweb pattern beneath. Cold, spindly fingers enclose around Sojourner’s hand. “You may, I am Zestial.” He bends down and kisses her hand. “Is thou responsible for the restoration of this establishment?” He asks, gently releasing her.

“Yes, sir.” She smiles proudly with her eyes glowing brightly, “I hope you weren’t sitting in darkness for too long.”

Zestial happily chuffs and shakes his head, “Worry not, dear girl. For I hath come upon the tailor only a short while ago.”

The door opens, letting in a cold breeze and a few snowflakes. “Merde, il fait froid!” Vera curses as she brushes the snow off of the garment back she is carrying. “My sincerest apologies for ze wait, monsieur!” She rushes over to Zestial and spots Sojourner. Cold fear washes over her face, “Oh, mademoiselle, finished already?” 

“Mm-hmm, everything is good to go!” The bear smiles and gives a thumbs up. “We can finish up after you and Mr. Zestial are done.” She steps aside and turns to the spider, “It is a pleasure to meet you, sir.” Bowing her head politely, “Please excuse me.” Zestial nods and Sojourner walks to the refreshment area, giving them privacy. 

Vera rushes behind the counter and fumbles for Zestial’s ticket. Praying to anyone who will listen that the girl didn’t offend him in any way while she was gone. His mood had turned sour when the seamstress didn’t have his garment at the ready. She promised to return quickly after she ran home to retrieve it. Why didn’t she tell Sojourner to stay in the back? Why!?

The hedgehog clears her throat nervously, “I apologize again for ze wait, monsieur.” Her voice shakes, “I always keep my VIP garments in my personal sewing room. I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow.” She explains.

“All is forgiven.” Zestial soothes, a warm smile sits on his dark gray face. “I was able to enjoy very pleasant company.” Vera’s eyebrows raise, she looks up and her mouth almost drops seeing how happy the ancient sinner is.

“La petite demoiselle?” The seamstress clarifies, “She didn’t… disturb you?” Glancing over to Sojourner, who is tapping away on her tablet.

“On the contrary, her presence is that of a bright day in spring.” The sound of scrittering intensifies, “Very refreshing.” He smiles at the small bear happily.

“I-I see.” She punches his ticket and hands over his garment, “I’m very ‘appy to know you are satisfied with your visit.”

“Indeed.” The giant spider accepts his items and walks towards the door, “I shall sing praises of your handywork and handywoman.”

Sojourner perks up at the movement and jogs over to the door, opening it for Zestial, “Have a lovely evening, sir!” She wishes with a smile, her eyes glow brightly as she watches her new friend exit.

Another happy chuff leaves Zestial as he bows to Sojourner, “And to you, my dear springtime, and to you.” Sojourner closes the door behind him and waves through the window. Zestial chuckles as he walks away.

Sojourner turns to Vera, “Es- tu prêt, madame?” She wiggles her tablet in her hand. Vera stares slack- jawed at the small bear. Does she not know who just exited the shop? How did this small ruffian manage to charm Hell’s oldest overlord?

“O-oui.” Vera stammers out, “I zink I am.”

Notes:

Meet Madam Vera LaGrand! Died in France in the 1990's, she's damned for stealing designs and claiming them as her own giving her massive success. Using her influence and riches, she was able to discredit claims against her for decades until one fateful fashion week, a scorned designed a coat out of sewing needles and deliberately jumped of the runway and onto the seamstress. Punctured over a thousand times, Vera died from her injuries in infamy as evidence revealed her as a thief.

Blitzø and Zestial have now entered the story. I'll admit it was a bit difficult getting the hang of archaic speech, but I think I did pretty well. I can't wait for Blitzø to take a big role!

Onwards!

Chapter 43: Tall Order

Summary:

Sojourner is making a name for herself in Pentagram City. Some heavy hitters are interested in her services, will they be enemies or assets?

Notes:

Giving a shoutout to VixenVenus for the inspiration behind this chapter! We were walking and getting sushi when she said Sojo and XXX would be a fun meet up! And I went feral!

Date: March 22, 2024

Age: 5 ½ years dead

Location: Leaving Carmilla Carmine’s Tower

Weather: Whatever passes as springtime down here

Current Conditions: Bidding Adieu to her first overlord client, settling a very lucrative agreement

 

“Gracias, Señora, it will be a pleasure working with you.” Sojourner thanks as she shakes the arms dealer’s very large hand. 

The overlord smiles down at her, “The pleasure is all mine, Ms. Knight. Thank you for coming on such short notice. Zestial spoke of your handywork, but I see you exceed expectations.” She grins to her friend who sips his tea in his seat, returning with a grin of his own. Sojourner peeks past Carmella’s tall frame and gives her elder a warm smile, her lights surge happily when he smiles back.

Clara walks over, holding a silver keycard in her hand, “Sojourner, this is for you. It will give you access to the weapons bay and workshops.” 

“Of course, we log and track your key at each access point, so do not go into restricted areas without permission.” Odetta finishes her sister’s sentence as she adjusts her glasses.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Sojourner replies as she tucks the key into Hot Mic. She still can’t believe that Carmilla Carmine has commissioned her services for their work benches. She’s a top overlord in Hell, doesn’t she have a whole team that can repair these? It doesn’t really matter now at this point, Sojourner already agreed on two days out of the week to have three hours set aside in case Señora Carmine needs her. Plus, she gets to hang out with Odette and Clara, who she instantly took a liking to. 

The girls are quiet, but have very active minds for mechanics and science, which is very appealing in Sojourner’s opinion. Maybe they will want to spend some time with her outside of work and they can meet Eggy and Toner. With their mother’s permission of course, the last thing Sojourner wants to do is upset Señora. But Carmilla seems reasonable, maybe that’s why Sojourner isn’t nervous to do business with her. The agreement is very fair too, both parties able to dissolve it at any time with amicable discussion with the other. 

The electrician waves goodbye to everyone in the chic office as she walks to the elevator, smiling at them as the doors close. Leaning against the railing, Sojourner leans her head back to blow out the very tense breath she didn’t realize she’s holding. What a day, first that snake guy commissions her, now this?

 

____________

Earlier that day March 22, 2024 Afternoon time, like 1345

 

Sojourner climbs into her van after paying Eggy and Toner a visit for a lunch date. The couple is happy that she’s perking up back to her old self, it’s been a tough year and a half but she’s making it. 

Shake it like a salt shaker, bounce that a-  

“Hello, Devil Dog’s Mechanic and Electrical Repairs, this is Sojourner speaking.” Sojourner answers smartly, ‘I have got to change this fuckin’ ringtone!’ Annoyed that Byson got a hold of her phone again.

“Uhh Hi! Is this the repair shop?” A very goofy voice asks.

“Yes, this Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electrical Repairs.” Sojourner clarifies as the silly voice takes her slightly aback.

“Well, hiya there! I’m Frank!” The voice introduces himself in a bright, happy tone.

“Hi Frank. I’m Sojourner, how may I help you?” Sojourner mirrors the energy, a smile breaking on her face.

“Can you fix stuff?” He asks curiously.

“Depends on what it is that needs fixin’ hon.” Sojourner fights not to giggle, “What do you need fixed?”

“Well, my boss’s war machine is broken.” Frank explains, “Plus, he’s broken and can’t fix it himself right now. So, I thought I could help by calling for help!” 

Sojourner’s eyes widen, “Did you say a war machine?” Clarifying that she heard the silly voice correctly.

“A-yup! It’s a real swell thing!” Another voice that’s just as goofy replies, “It shoots lasers and flies and fires rockets-”

“Who the devil are you all sssspeaking to?” A raspy voice hisses, he sounds like he just woke up.

“Oh, hiya boss! We were tellin’ Southerner about the war machine and how great it is when it’s not broken!”

“My name is Sojourner.” The sailor corrects, knowing they probably didn’t hear her.

“Sssoutherner? What ssssoutherner? I don’t know any ssssouthernersss, plusss don’t share my ssssecretsss with othersss!” He commands as the phone is snatched from Frank. “Hello? Who are you?”

“Hello, sir. My name is Sojourner and I was called to maybe come repair your…war machine?” Sojourner introduces herself, “May I ask who’s speaking?”

“You are ssspeaking to the Great Sssir Pentiousss!” The snake declares, “And I didn’t not give my minionsss clearance to reveal my war machine to you!” He snaps. “I demand you tell me your location sssso that I can come desssstoy you!”

“Um, no?” Sojourner answers flatly. “I’m not gonna do that, dude. Look, Frank told me you’re a little worse for wear right now and can’t fix your machine yourself. Do you want me to come take a look and see if I can help?”

“Ha! Asss if your feeble mind isss able to comprehend the complexitiesss of my machinesss!” Sir Pentious laughs mockingly, “My brilliant mind issss no match for anything you can do!”

“So, I can fix stuff better than you?” Sojourner questions, unsure if the snake heard himself correctly.

“What? No! I’m implying that I can make better repairssss!” Sir Pentious corrects.

“Okay, but you just said that your mind was no match for what I could do.” Sojourner explains, her amusement growing.

“I did not!” The snake argues indignantly.

“Yeah, ya did, babe.” Sojourner retorts.

“No, I didn’t!” He snaps hotly.

“You sure did, boss!” Frank speaks happily, “You said your brilliant mind didn’t stand a chance!”

“Yup! Sure did! You tell her boss!” The other minions reply excitedly.

“What the- Oh, goddamnit!” The serpent curses, immediately embarrassed by his slip of the tongue. “Shut up, all of you!”

“You got it, boss!” They all chime together.

It takes everything Sojourner has not to laugh at the poor guy, it’s clear he’s exhausted and possibly recovering from a head injury. “Listen, how about I come by and do an assessment? If your brilliance is too much for me to handle, I’ll leave you be. Sounds fair?”

Sir Pentious grumbles and rubs his aching head. He wouldn’t be getting much work done with a concussion, busted arm, and injured tail, maybe hiring a competent minion would help for a change. “Mmmm~ Fine! But know thissss, if I catch you trying to ssssabotage me or ssssteal my ideasss, I will kill you mysssself!” 

“You got it, boss!” Sojourner agrees in a goofy voice, mimicking Frank.

“Ssssmart assss!” Sir Pentious hisses, making Sojourner finally laugh.

“Alright my guy, send me your location and I’ll be there soon.” The sailor chuckles as she starts up her van.

From that day on, Sojourner and Sir Pentious became fond friends. She would come and help repair his war machine whenever he got into a turf war with other sinners hoping to rise up the ranks. The inventor complained often about an Australian cyclops sinner that gave him the most grief, Cherri Bomb.  However, after months of listening to him gripe about her, it dawned on Sojourner that perhaps the bomber didn’t aggravate Sir Pentious as much as he was letting on. One crisp October day, while she was packing up her tools and rescuing Hot Mic from the Egg bois, Sojourner asked her friend a searing question.

“Dude, do you have a crush on her?” The blunt question makes the snake fumble his lit welding torch. Thankfully, he catches it without any damage or injury to himself or his equipment.

“Wh-wha- I-I, me? What a propossssteroussss quessstion!” He stammers out, lifting his goggles onto his top hat. “What the devil would make you think that?”

“I mean she’s all you talk about. You compliment her bombs, her fighting style, the way she looks when she’s fuckin’ up your stuff.” Sojourner lists on her fingers, “I mean if I had an archnemesis, I wouldn’t be noticing how the wind picks up their wild locks and how well it frames their face. The same face that you seem to hyper-fixate on, might I add.”

Sir Pentious’s face heats up. Him? Liking Cherri? The idea hadn't even occurred to him until Sojourner pointed it out. “W-well, you sssee-” He starts as he fidgets with the torch.

“Not to mention, you’re beet red right now.” Sojourner continues, “Which is very impressive on account of your dark skin.” 

The blush on Sir Pentious’s cheeks gets redder, does he like Ms. Cherri? It’s true that she’s an admirable foe, and her explosives are the finest he’s ever seen or experienced. But to have feelings for her. “I-I never really thought about it, to be honesssst.” He mumbles as he leans against the wall. “I sssupposse it could be a posssssiblity.”

Sojourner claps her hands and smiles, “Aaaaww, that’s so sweet! Good for you!” She chuckles as she clips Hot Mic onto her waist. “Investigate those feelings and have fun with them!”

The inventor straightens up and tilts his head to the side, “In-invessstigate? Invessstigate how?” 

“Well, ask yourself what you like about her and why.” Sojourner zips up her Southpaw liner and pulls out her car keys, “What emotions does she entice in you? What is appealing about Cherri? And once you start to understand those feelings, maybe try talking to her instead of just battling her. Maybe give her a compliment or something.” She spins her keys around on her lanyard. “Who knows? You might get to tell her you like her one day.”

“In-indeed.” Sir Pentious scratches his chin bashfully, his hat mirrors his expression. “You are quite knowledgable in emotionssss Sssssojourner, how isss it that you know ssso much?”

The spinning stops as the sailor catches the keys in her hand. “I…I, uh, I’ve kinda been doin’ a lot of self-help for a long time.” Sojourner confesses, “I spend most of my free time workin’ on myself and my relationships.” She looks down, suddenly focused on toying with her lanyard.

Sir Pentious notices his friend’s sudden shift in mood. Uneasy, he presses forward, “May I asssk why?” 

Sojourner looks up and forces a smile, there’s a heavy sadness behind it, “I have to, I made a promise.” Her voice breaks a little and she clears her throat. “My buddy, uh, we vowed that we would take care of ourselves no matter what happens to the other.” Tears start to prickle at her eyes, but she quickly blinks them away.

“I… take it your companion iss no longer with ussss?” Sir Pentious asks sadly.

A tear falls as Sojourner fights to keep the smile on her face. “Today is his birthday.” She whispers. Sniff, sniff . She feels something squeeze her leg and she looks down. Frank and the rest of the egg bois huddle around her in a makeshift group hug. More tears fall, these silly little chatterboxes are all so sweet, it only makes her want to cry more. She’s so tired of crying, when the hurt let up?

“Sssssojourner?” Sir Pentious calls gently, getting her attention. He slithers over and pulls her into a hug, “I’m deeply sssorry for your lossss.” 

Sojourner breaks down in tears and wraps her arms around him, sobbing into his jacket. Hearing her cry makes Pentious tear up himself. In the time he’s gotten to know her, Sojourner seems to have a good head on her shoulders. Indulging in his ambitious ideas, sharing her knowledge and skills to help him, being patient with his idiotic minions, all of whom she learned by name. She even believes Sir Pentious can become an overlord on his own, without the recognition of others.

He remembers her words as clear as day, “You don’t need anyone else’s approval but your own. If people refuse to see you, then fuck ‘em!” She said one day when he shared his frustration at being ignored by the Vee’s again. “Focus on the people that choose you! That includes yourself!” The inventor hugs his companion tighter, Sojourner truly is a good friend, and a kind, helpful person, which begs the question in Sir Pentious’ mind: 

What the hell is she doing down here?

Notes:

Wow the arms dealer Carmilla Carmine wants to do business? Thanks Zestial. Also Sir Pentious has entered the chat! Writing for the egg bois is so much stinking fun!

Chapter 44: Demon in Red

Summary:

Alastor has returned to Hell, let off leash by his loving (sarcasm) handler. Wonder what she's up to.

Notes:

I'm only posting two chapters this week lovlies, the next installment is a three part and was hilarious and fun to write! I'll see y'all next week.

Date: April 8, 2025

Age: Well over 100

Location: An old rickety radio tower

Weather: Windy, not the best for a rickety, old tower

Current Conditions: Getting a little more length on his leash

 

“I understand, ma’am.” Alastor’s staticky voice confirms, “It will be done.”

“Aw, now are you the most well-behaved overlord I’ve ever had?” Roo coos through his staff, “Now, you go feed and have fun! I’ll be speaking to you soon!” Her overly sweet tone sickens him. But would he dare say anything? Never. Not unless he wants to keep her safe.

“Yes, ma’am.” Alastor’s monotone voice answers.

“And Alastor?” Roo chimes in a sing-songy voice.

“Yes, ma’am?” The deer demon answers politely.

“Don’t forget to smile!” She cackles cruelly before her voice fades out. But Alastor can still hear her. He can still feel her too, her claws raking his skin and pulling him apart only to restore him right after and do it all over again. Like a cat that gets joy out of pulling apart a bird, never eating it, simply enjoying the kill. 

Alastor perks up as a strong gust of wind makes his radio tower creak miserably. He can see all of Pentagram City from his perch. Hell, he was back in Hell, and honestly? The Radio-Demon couldn’t be more thankful. He was free of her, well as free as he can be, but now was his chance to find a way to break away from Roo. A chance to get the power he needs to fight against her. 

‘Patience, dear fellow. Don’t get too ahead of yourself.’ Alastor reminds himself as he takes a deep breath and shakes off the jitters. Standing up and straightening his coat, Alastor grabs his staff and exits the tower. He takes another look over Pentagram City and his eerie grin widens, “Let’s see what’s on the menu, shall we?” He asks his shadow counterpart as it smiles excitedly. 

Might as well have fun while he’s down here.

________________________________

2209, April 08, 2025, ???

 

Roo tosses the mic on the white marble desk next to her propped up feet, sighing as she folds her hands behind her head. Everything is going her way and none of these feathered assholes are the wiser that it’s her up here instead of dear ol’ Dad.

Though she must admit, Heaven is fuckin’ boring ! Holy shit, everything is so bright and clean and obnoxious! And fuck her if those seraphims aren’t the most pretentious wads of ugh she’s ever had the displeasure of manipulating. They’re all so dutiful, none of them even question if it’s really their Pa that’s giving them all these bogus messages. It’s almost too easy and easy is no fun at all.

Roo doesn’t even have Eve’s soul to torment anymore. The moment she sealed the deal with that reindeer, the little bitch’s soul was snatched out of her grasp. Don’t ask where cuz Roo has no idea and up until boredom had her pulling her hair out, she truly didn’t care. 

Though, if the dark entity is being honest, which is rare, there was hardly anything left of Eve anyway. Her soul has been decaying since the day mommy dearest finally gave in to Roo after Cain finally snapped and caved Abel’s skull in with that jawbone. Damn that was funny, like how in the fuck was Cain suppose to know that was gonna happen? No human had died before Abel, so who could’ve guessed what would happen after getting a love tap to the noggin? 

Roo could, she was there. She was there the whooole time, whispering in Cain’s ear how he was never enough and how he will always be lesser than his perfect brother. What else was Cain supposed to do? He couldn’t square up against Big G Themself. So naturally Roo suggested taking out the competition, that’s what the problem was anyways, so it made sense. It’s not her fault Cain sucks at covering up a murder, but she’ll cut him some slack. It was the first murder in human history, of course it’s gonna be a little sloppy.

Phew . “Good times, good times.” Roo grins to herself. Stretching and standing up, she walks over to the window and peeks through the blinds. Ugh, look at them all, the smiling, blissful fuckwads. She hates it, she hates the winners, the sinners and anything else that was ever created in this godforsaken universe. A flit of blue catches her attention, there he was, the most hated thing of all.

“Michael!” A wicked grin stretches Roo’s black lips. “You look like you’re catching up on sleep! We can’t have that now can we?” She struts over to the desk and closes her eyes. The room falls to pitch black darkness as the Root of all Evil harnesses all her glamour into her voice. She needs precise concentration each time she does this, otherwise everything she’s built over the past seven years will be for nothing.

“Gabriel,”  

The messenger angel immediately goes limp as his ‘Father’s’ voice echoes in his head.

‘I am here, Father.’ Gabriel answers, obediently.

‘I have instructions for Azrael.’

Roo still has a score to settle with the warrior.

Notes:

Oh shit, Roo pulled it off. She's in Heaven and she has some serious beef with our darling warrior angel. Now we know who's giving Azrael the green light for those brutal training sessions.

Chapter 45: Dirty Bomb

Summary:

Emergency in V Tower, Vox's assistant, Elliot needs to find capable hands to fix monitor room. Plus y'know the holy hand grenade of team live badass? Yeah, I got some lore for y'all.

Notes:

I'm not contagious anymore but I'm far from okay. But! I can go back to work tomorrow so that's cool

Date: August 17, 2025

Age: 7 years in Hell yesterday

Location: Entertainment District- Russell’s Deli

Weather: Hotter than a Mofo up in here, jeez Louise

 

“Order up, Knight!” Russell crows, ringing his bell and holding up her order. 

Sojourner squeezes through the breakfast rush to get to the front, getting stuck between a mummy sinner and a rhinoceros. Her excuse me’s fall on deaf ears.

The falcon sinner frowns, then puffs up his chest. “MAKE A HOLE!!” He bellows, spooking the crowd in front to separate. Sojourner stumbles through and catches herself on the counter, out of breath. 

Phew. “Thanks, Bill!” The small bear wheezes, accepting her food order. “I could’ve waited in line y’know.”

“Front of the line privileges, Knight.” The old retiree grins, “And I made it myself, no nuts or peanuts.” He leans down and whispers to her. The sailor’s face falls into a deep frown, three years later and she still can’t believe her allergies came back.

__________

2156, August 23, 2022, Tone-Death Paint Shop

The rest of Gunny’s memorial had lasted long into the evening. Sojourner got a chance to speak to nearly everyone she saved that attended, which was a lot but it did help keep her from crying so much. She didn’t expect so many people to be so appreciative, but the genuine thanks eventually gave her peace that she hadn’t made a mistake paying it forward, even if she wasn’t going to do it anymore. 

At the end of the evening, Master Sergeant William Russell and LCDR Hannah Penny stuck around, swapping sea stories with Sojourner, Toner, and Eggy, successfully making the Navy sinner laugh. Before they all bidded goodnight, the group decided to toast to Chester's memory, all swearing to keep living, regardless of who’s around. 

For the unknown number of times that day, tears filled Sojourner’s eyes and spilled over, “Fair winds and following seas, Chester. We’ve got the watch.” She raised her shot glass as the others followed suit, “Semper Fidelis.” Tilting her head back, Sojourner downed the shot, her mismatched eyes squeezed shut at the sharp burn. 

“Semper Fidelis.” Her friends echoed and drank, Penny and Eggy cleared their throats at the harsh alcohol.

“Shoooo, that’s strong.” Toner’s voice suppressed a cough and slapped his chest. He burped and his flames leapt off his skull, “Oof, perdóneme.” The painter winced.

Russell’s feathers ruffled as he shook the shock off, whew . “Yeah, this’ll put some glide feathers on your chest.”

Sojourner’s stomach burned, like really burned. She coughed, hoping to pass the bubble that was likely stuck, but the cough was metallic. The bear pulled in a breath and it felt like she was breathing through a straw, she couldn’t breathe! The shot glass shattered on the ground as her hands flew up to her throat and her knees buckled.

“Knight!?” Penny cried, the army medic caught her and lowered her to the ground. Everyone crowded around them, Penny ordered them back before barking orders, instantly recognizing the signs of anaphylaxis.

Pure panic coursed through Sojourner as muscle memory of previous reactions kicked in. She was going to choke, she was going to pass out... She died. And took about three days to regenerate. When the sailor finally woke up, she was in the hospital with a searing headache that was all too familiar. Eggy and Toner never once left her side and cried for an hour straight when she asked, “Da fuck happened?”

LCDR Penny, who worked in the hospital, came in and explained everything they know so far.

Long story, short. Fuck Heaven and their angelic dirty bomb. The grenade that stupid big bird tossed was laced with toxic genetic altering bullshit that basically gave her back every ailment she had when she was alive. Her food allergies, her neurological problems, a slower healing rate, menstrual cramps!  

“For fuck’s sake, Penny! Seriously?” Sojourner asked incredulously. “My neuro problems alone are enough to want to stay dead! My god, the migraines and vertigo!” She flopped backwards dramatically. “My period cramps are crippling!!”

“Yeah, real shit, fuck Heaven, dude!” Penny nodded, adjusting her skin made of sterile gauze, stitches, staples, and safety tape. “I mean silver lining, you’re not gonna bleed.”

“But she’s gonna get everything else!” Eggy argued, “Period shits, lightening asshole, oh, god the bloating!”

“Fuck Heaven!” Toner cursed as his flames turned a dark red.

“Fuck them!” The ladies agreed.

____________

0818, August 23, 2025, Vee Tower- Monitor Room

A trickle of sweat slides down Elliott’s face as he shields his face with his clipboard. His long eel tail swishes nervously at the tense atmosphere, his spectacled eyes squeeze shut as the tall pimp stomps past him, shoving him roughly to the ground into a pool of slick blood. The sound of his heels click until the automated doors open and shut.

Huff, huff, snnnnnnnnf. Vox takes a deep inhale as he holds his bleeding arm and glares through his one good eye. He steps over his dead tech team, careful to not get blood on his boots. He walks up to his assistant and looms over him.

“Lewis,” The tech demon says way too calmly, looking straight ahead. Anger spills off him in a dangerous air. That’s not his name.

The poor eel shakes violently as he looks up to his owner. “Ye-yes, Mr. V-Vox?” He answers obediently.

Vox cycles another deep breath, trying not to lose his shit before he can get things fixed. “Call facilities and get them to clean this up, then find someone to fix. My. Room.” BZZZZT ZZZT XXT!! The sparking monitors and wires full of blood and bullet holes emphasize the overlord’s words. “I don’t care if you have to pull someone off the fucking street. I want my monitors up and running by 6:30 tonight, or I will feed you to my sharks, do you understand?” He grits his teeth as pain pulses through his arm.

“Yes, sir!” Elliott tries to scramble to his feet only to slip on the bloodied floor. 

Vox closes his eyes, fighting for that last ion of patience. “Call Felicity and tell her to meet me in my office with a new screen and the medkit in 5 minutes. Then send Katie and Tom up, I need to prepare those idiots to interview Lucifer’s brat.” He hisses through another bout of pain as he limps away, “I want an update in 30 minutes.”

“Yes, sir!” Elliott answers, getting up and tapping his headset, “I need facilities up in the monitor room, stat!”

—————

0827, Entertainment District, Devil Dog’s Van

“Eggs n’ ham n’ cheese n’ bread, put it all together and ya got some breakfast! Eggs n’ ham n’ cheese n’ bre-“

KNOCKKNOCKKNOCKKNOCK!! Knuckles rap frantically on Sojourner’s window, interrupting her made up song and scaring her shitless. 

“EEEEEEEEKK!” She screams and launches her breakfast potatoes all over the dashboard and passenger seat. The frightened bear leans away from the window as the stressed out sinner continues to knock. “WHAT IS IT?” Sojourner shouts, locking the door and not touching the window.

“Are you an electrician?” The nasally sinner asks, his hands pressing up on the glass. “Please say yes!” He begs.

Sojourner stares at the disheveled sinner, the scrawny thing is out of breath and his rectangular glasses are askew. His lanky body shakes as he pulls in deep breaths.

“Um, yeah?” The sailor finally answers.

“C-can you fix computers?” The eel sinner wheezes. “A-and wires?”

“Uh-huh.” Sojourner nods slowly, not sure what the eel is getting at.

“Pl-please, I need your help, it’s an emergency!” The sinner clasps his hands together and begs. “My life is literally on the line!”

Sojourner studies the begging man, his nervous black and red eyes dart back and forth looking at his and his body hunched in on himself. His knuckles are white as he squeezes his hands together and sweat pours from his dampened brow. He’s telling the truth. 

The electrician cracks her window, “What’s wrong?” She asks, tilting her mouth towards the crack.

“M-m-my boss, his computer room is destroyed and I only have until 6:30 to get it repaired or he’ll kill me!”

Sojourner looks at him suspiciously, “Does your boss know what happened to his computer room?” She questions.

“Yes! He was there when his…boyfriend? I guess, destroyed it!” The tech eel explains, desperation rising in his voice. “My boss is busy getting patched up and he has tasked me to fix everything! I’ve called all over Pentagram City and no one will come help! You’re my last hope!” Tears fill the sinner’s eyes as his voice cracks, the poor guy is out of options.

Sojourner considers the man’s plight and checks her schedule, so far her day is free other than going to do an assessment for Blitzø in his new office. She shoots him a quick text for a reschedule and grabs Hot Mic. The sinner moves back, allowing her to open her door and exit her vehicle.

“What’s your name, sweetheart?” The bear asks as she clips Hot Mic onto her hip.

“Elliott.” The eel sniffs, taking off his glasses to wipe his sweaty brow.

“Nice to meet ya, Elliott. I’m Sojourner.” She introduces herself, opening the back of the van and climbing in to grab her electrical repair kit, rubber mat, and meters. “Do you have replacement parts and materials already?”

“Yes, w-w-we do.” He answers as his unsteady hands place his glasses back on.

“Cool, I’ll do an assessment and then have your boss sign my employment contract.” Sojourner states as she feeds Hot Mic her multimeter.

A fresh sweat breaks out on Elliott’s forehead, “Con-contract?” He squeaks.

Hopping down, Sojourner shuts the door, locks the van, and arms it. “Yeah, standard agreement of services. Client must pay the full invoice, alternate payment plans can be discussed if need be with no interest if I choose, blah, blah, blah. Typical business stuff.” She explains as she gives her keys to Hot Mic.

“Oh, that kind of contract.” Elliott breathes relieved and starts walking towards the building.

Sojourner follows, chuckling, “Yeah, pumpkin, I’m not trying to snatch a soul down here. That’s way too much work.”

Elliott smiles at her, comforted by her lighthearted nature. “Heh, good to know.”

_________________

0902, V-Tower, Monitor Room

“Woooooww~” Sojourner drones as she stares aghast at the damaged mega-sized monitors. “Elliott, I think you may have undersold this, babe.” Her hips cock to the side as her hand covers her mouth. She walks up to the massive keyboard and winces at the damages. “Are these…bullet holes?” The electrician asks, turning to the assistant.

Elliott rubs his head, “Yeah, Mr. Valentino was upset that his best performer moved out and Mr. Vox wasn’t giving him the attention he wanted, so he…” The eel trails off, hesitant to continue the story.

Eyes wide as saucers, Sojourner urges him to finish, “He? He what?!” She snaps.

Wincing, Elliott whispers, “Mr. Valentino shot Mr. Vox and his computers…and his… tech team.” He holds his breath as he waits for Sojourner’s reaction.

She stares at the eel. Hard. “Word?” She finally speaks after about half a minute of shocked silence. “Is- is that why it reeks of bleach in here? Did they just now finish cleaning up?” She doesn’t bother to hide the panic in her voice. 

Hiding behind the clipboard again, Elliott nods meekly. ‘She’s going to leave and I can’t even blame her.’ He thinks miserably, waiting for her to quit.

“I-is Mr. Valentino, coming back up here?” Sojourner asks as she cautiously looks towards across the bridge to the door.

Surprised by her question, Elliott flips through his phone to check the schedule, “N-no, he’s in his studio for the rest of the day, he’s starting a new series today and… this ,” He gestures to the chaos behind Sojourner, “Put him behind schedule.”

Sojourner places her hands on her hips, “Cool~” She huffs and looks at the disarray behind her again. It looks a lot worse than it is. That one Valentine’s Day at Eggy’s was much harder to fix; plus, she had to hunt down all the materials herself. She tightens her bun and claps her hands. “Alright, I can fix this.” She states.

“You can?!” Elliott damn near cries as he hugs his clipboard to his chest. 

“Yup. Here’s what I’m gonna need-” Elliott scribbles down all the supplies Sojourner lists to restore the monitor room, calling people as she names items. “The schematic is very important, I’m gonna need it if your boss wants everything to behave as it did before.” She explains as she taps on her tablet before handing it to Elliott. “Here’s the agreement of service that Boss Man needs to read and sign before I get started. I’m not doing a damn thing until I get his signature. Hot Mic will let me know once he hits ‘agree’.”

Elliott takes the tablet and places it on top of his clipboard, “Hot Mic?” He asks curiously.

“This cutie right here!” Sojourner turns her body to show Elliott the sentient tool pouch. It glares angrily at him and snaps its teeth, growling. The eel leans back in alarm. “Hot Mic!” The bear chastises, “You be sweet to him, he’s not hurting anybody!” The tool pouch gruffs in annoyance. “I’m sorry, Elliott. He doesn’t like men, we’re working on it.” Sojourner apologizes, petting the top of its head.

“I-I-I understand.” Elliott stutters, still leaning away from the pouch. “Is there anything else you need before I go?”

“Just your love and support.” Sojourner jokes brightly, giving him a grin.

Elliott pauses, then he laughs. Like really laughs, belly laughs even. The nerves of his stressful morning begin melting away. “I think I can do that.” He snorts, spinning on his heel. “I’ll be back soon with your tablet and schematics! You have your radio?” He calls over his shoulder.

Beep, beep.

“Electric avenue to Teddy Edison, I have my radio, over.” Sojourner’s playful voice speaks into Elliott’s headset. He laughs again.

“Copy that, Teddy Edison. I read you loud and clear, over.” The assistant chuckles as he makes his way to Vox’s office. Elliott walks with a bit of bounce in his step as he approaches Vox’s office. Adjusting his hair and tie, he gives three sharp knocks on the steel door.

“What?” An irritated voice answers impatiently, “Who is it?”

“It’s me, sir. I’m here with an update and some things to sign.” Elliott answers brightly.

“Who the fuck is ‘me’?” Vox asks, he sounds a little out of it.

“Elliott, sir.” The eel replies.

“Who?” The overlord gets more confused by the second.

“Your personal assistant?” Elliott tries again.

“...Uuuuhh~” Vox struggles to remember who the fuck he’s talking about.

“Eel, glasses, red blazer?” He can’t believe this, how does Vox still not know his name?

“...Wha?”

“Lewis.” Elliott finally says.

“Oh shit, it’s you! Hurry up and get the fuck in here!” The door slides open, allowing the poor assistant to enter.

Elliott walks into the large office, bypassing the long, blue conference table and carnivorous plants. He sees the massive shark tank behind Vox’s desk with the overlord in question leaned back in his chair. A tall, neon yellow and gray angelfish sinner stands over him, soldering a new motherboard into his face monitor.

“You better have some good news.” The tech demon threatens from his desk intercom. His blue claws tap impatiently on his armrest.

“Y-yes! Facilities are done with clean up and the tech team should make a speedy recovery in about 36 hours.” Elliott stutters as he flips through his notes. “Katie and Tom will be up in 11 minutes after the traffic update and the princess is scheduled to arrive at 4:15 for her 4:45 segment.”

“And what about my room, Lewis?” Vox’s question drips with venom. “I was serious when I said 6:30 tonight. ”

Elliott gulps and adjusts his glasses, “I have someone who said they can fix it up there right now!” He clumsily fumbles and almost drops Sojourner’s tablet. “They just need your signature on their service agreement before getting started.”

“I can’t see right now, you idiot!” The overlord’s fist slams on the armrest. “ I’m not signing shit!” He growls.

“The fuck are you pussy aching about now?” A sharp, British accent calls from the couch. Velvette lifts her gaze from her phone and tilts her head in the group’s direction.

“The fucking handyman wants me to sign a fuckin’ agreement to have the privilege to touch my monitors!” Vox snaps incredulously, “Is he stupid or does he seriously not know who he’s messing with?”

Elliott holds up a finger, “Actually sir, Sojo is a-” He begins to correct.

“I don’t give a shit who Mojo thinks he is! Tell him to get to work or I’ll kill you both!”

“Oh, for fuck’s sakes, Vox! You make everything so dramatic!” Velvette rolls her eyes and snaps her fingers at Elliott, “Martin, give me the stupid tablet.”

“His name is Lewis.” Vox corrects as the eel jogs over.

‘You’re both wrong.’ Elliott thinks to himself, but he’s not gonna correct them. They probably wouldn’t remember anyway.

Velvette skims over the two page contract, already bored with the legal mumbo-jumbo.

“What’s it say, Vel?” Vox asks, crossing his legs and bouncing it.

The doll sighs, she’s not reading this whole fucking thing and decides to summarize, “This contract is to observe the contractor Spaghetti Knit is renderin’ repair services to Vox of VoxTek enterprises. Sigh. Blah, blah, blah. $250 an hour, materials from client are provided. Are you really going to have me read this whole fucking thing?” Velvette grouches, letting the tablet flop in her lap, “It’s a straightforward agreement of services Vox! He ain’t even chargin’ a deposit for ‘day of’ rush services!”

“It’s a contract, Vel! You have no idea what sneaky shit these fuckers try to pull on me each day!” Vox argues, “What are the clauses?”

“A bunch of crybaby bullshit! Collateral if he doesn’t get paid half a year past the deadline, he’ll fuck off home if he doesn’t feel safe!” The fashion diva smacks the screen with her hand, “This guy’s a pussy! Sign the damn thing and be done wit’ it!”

“The clauses. Velvette.” Vox growls through his virtual teeth. 

“Oh, fuck me! If you hurt this guys fuckin’ feelins, he won’t close the contract until he gets an apology!” Velvette stares shocked at the screen, “Is mandem for real?”

“It seriously says that?” Vox asks, his voice holds genuine surprise.

“The man is softer than a full nappy. Just sign it and tell ‘em to fuck off when he’s done.” She throws the tablet at Elliott who barely catches it, “He can take his sensitive plumber’s crack home and wank off!” She scoffs and picks up her phone again. “The fuck he’s gonna do anyway? Sue?”

The T.V. overlord taps his fingers on his armrest and mulls it over. This guy really is a pushover if he has to say “don’t be mean to me.” in his fuckin’ contracts.

“Give me the stupid tablet, Lewis” Vox sighs, holding out his hand. 

“His name is Martin.” Velvette corrects as the assistant jogs back over to his boss.

‘Again, both wrong.’ Elliott thinks tiredly.

Vox snatches the tablet from him and scribbles blindly at the bottom, thankfully Elliott had the good sense to have the signature block ready to sign.

“Where’s the stupid agree button?” Vox asks, hovering his finger over the screen.

Felicity guides his finger and pushes it onto the agree button. A green check mark flashes across the screen.

—————

0844, V-Tower, Monitor room

“Thank you.” Sojourner waves to the staff that drops off the last of the equipment she’ll need. Hot Mic chirps brightly, the agreement has been signed. “Alright, buddy.” She pops in her earbuds and turns on a R&B playlist. “Let’s knock this out!”

 

Chapter 46: Quality Assurance

Summary:

Sojo is in the heart of V-Tower and she is pushing herself waaayy too far. Luckily, her new friend is looking out for her.

Notes:

Part Two of the three parter! I had no idea how fun the Vee's are to write!

Date: August 17, 2025

Age: Still very much dead

Location: V-Tower

Weather: Dude, shut up

Current Conditions: Fixing screens and taking names

 

Sojourner was almost done repairing one of the thick cables when Elliott returned with her tablet now full of the schematics she needed. As he crosses the bridge, a melodic voice resonates in the large space, someone is singing.

“Strummin’ my pain with his fingers.

Singin’ my life with his words.

Killin’ me softly with his song,

Killin’ me softly, with his song”

Elliott stops at the foot of the ladder and looks up, listening to the smooth alto continue to sing. She sounds amazing.

“Tellin’ my whole life with his words

Killin’ me softly with his son-”

She stops when she looks down to reach into Hot Mic and notices she has company. Pausing her music, she pops out an earbud.

“Hey sugar,” The bear says a bit flustered of the unexpected company, “I didn’t think you’d be back so soon.”

Elliott’s tail swishes back and forth, he’s really starting to like these nicknames, “Y-yeah, ahem ! I have your tablet and the schematics.” He stammers as his gray cheeks flush red.

“That’s because you’re amazing, thank you!” Sojourner says, placing her wire crimps between her teeth as she puts the heavy splice on the damaged wire. “Gif meh one sec.” She repairs the wire and wraps electrical tape around the cable. Climbing down a few rungs, she reaches down and plucks her tablet from Elliott’s outstretched hand.

The eel steps back and looks at her work, “You repaired that already?” He asks, surprised at Sojourner’s speed.

“It was just a through-and-through. Only one wire was nicked, the rest checked fine.” The electrician explains as she moves onto the next damaged cable, “The bullets were pretty small, thankfully, so there shouldn’t be a lot of damage to the cables.”

“I-I see.” Elliott comments, watching Sojourner strip the thick black out shielding and inspect the damage. She cuts out the broken segment of copper wire and pulls out half a foot of replacement wire to replace it. ‘She moves so quickly.’ The aquatic sinner thinks, admiring the speed of Sojourner’s hands.

“You sound re-really nice.” Elliott mutters, quickly getting shy.

“Whazzat, sweets?” Sojourner asks, turning around with her crimps in her mouth again. Blegh. “Say again? I couldn’t hear you.”

The blush spreads further on the eel’s gray face, “I-I said fish can get lice! Bye!” He takes off, clutching his clipboard to his chest.

Sojourner stares after Elliott, processing his outburst as the exit opens and closes. “Holy shit, really?” She gasps, “That sucks, ew!” She thinks about that new fact for the majority of her time repairing the cables.

It takes Sojourner a little over two hours to repair all the hanging cables and tie them together to be more cohesive. She groups the cables by monitor location to reduce unnecessary tension, and give whoever Valentino is a harder target to shoot.

Now, for the heavy lifting task of replacing the monitors. Thankfully, all the damaged screens were on the first layer of monitors and they were within her reach on a shorter ladder. 

‘Goddamn, why in the funk does anyone need over 30 screens?’ The nine screens that are broken glitch and flash brightly at different rates, a perfect setting for someone with severe neuro issues.

“I gotta get this done quick.” Sojourner squints, already feeling the stress in her eyes. ‘Fuck. That. Angelic. Dirty bomb!’ She curses for an unknown number of times. 

The electrician kicks into high gear, taking the hardware off the old monitor, removing it, and lifting the new monitor in its place. The physical labor plus the heat of the space inevitably gets to Sojourner and makes her horrifically dizzy as she screws the last monitor in place.

Taking Hot Mic off her waist, Sojourner unzips her coveralls and shimmies off the top half, rolling the garment down to her waist and tying the sleeves in place. She feels sick, her head is splitting and the heat is making her disoriented and nauseous. The sailor glances at her watch, 1512, it’s that late in the day already? Fuck, those monitors ate up so much of her time and she still has to repair the keyboard. 

Sojourner squints and looks behind her, at the massive command center riddled with bullets. It’s a little more complicated than a keyboard, but she can at least sit down and work on it. She reaches down for Hot Mic and loses her balance. Five minutes, she’ll get to it in five minutes. 

“I gotta take a break.” She groans, sliding down to the floor and leaning against the command center. Grabbing her water bottle, she sips her cold water and holds a cube of ice in her mouth. Sojourner closes her mismatched eyes in an attempt to give them a break from the blue lights. ‘Damn, it hurts to even close my eyes.’

“Sojo?” A gentle hand shakes her, “Are you okay?” The nasally voice sounds worried.

Peeking her green eye open is absolute agony, “I’ll be okay.” She grunts, blinking rapidly to clear her vision. The image of Elliott sharpens, concern is deeply etched into his forehead.

Sojourner looks at her watch, 1523. Alright, a little more than five minutes, but the way she’s feeling right now, it’s a bit warranted. Pushing the heels of her hands into her eyes, Sojourner sighs at the little bit of relief the counter pressure it gives before dropping them into her lap.

Elliott frowns, Sojourner really doesn’t look okay. In fact, she looks sick. “Are you sure you’re alright?” He asks, helping her to stand.

Her eyes still tightly closed, the bear nods, “I’m good, bright lights just mess me up sometimes, that’s all.” She looks at him and smiles, “Thanks for asking, E.” Her hand gently pats him on the shoulder.

“Is there anything I could get for you?” Elliott asks, he’s really worried about his new friend.

“As I said earlier, just your love and support.” Sojourner chuckles, picking up Hot Mic and turning towards the command center, “Now, let’s cross our fingers and pray to anyone who will listen that most of this damage is just cosmetic.” She lifts the top cover to expose the interior. “Well, shit.” 

Three large circuit boards, two of which are multilayered, have been shot through and to top it all off, “Oh, fuck me, they’re soldered !” Sojourner groans as her chin drops to her chest. She dramatically pulls in an exasperated breath and lets out a loud huff. Elliott watches as Sojourner stands still, hunched over in what seems to be defeat.

“Uh…” He starts and jumps when the bear pops back up.

“Okay, I’m done being dramatic. Let’s do this.” She says brightly and shuts off the power to the console.

The eel watches in awe as Sojourner gets her second wind and her hands fly to pull out the damaged cards and toss them out. He wants to do something to help her, he knows she’s just pushing through the pain.

“I’ll uh, I’ll be right back okay?” Elliott says as jogs back out of the room.

“Take your time, baby. I’ll be right here.” Sojourner replies back, sorting through the new circuit cards provided and using the schematic.

Elliott taps his headset, “Kitty, can you stop by the kitchen, please? I need you to pick up an order.”

Notes:

Our girl is feelin' it! But the finish line is in sight. Almost done Sojo!

Chapter 47: In Your Face

Summary:

Sojo has restored Vox's command center better than it was before. Unfortunately, she basically has 1 HP left and needs to get out of there before something unfortunate happens. Like getting a certain someone's attention.

TW: Graphic Body Fluids and Sickness, Mild Harassment, and alluding to pornography!

Notes:

Y'all when I tell you I was cackling writing this chapter! I really hope y'all enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it!

Date: August 17, 2025 seriously? Still?

Age: Goddamn it, it’s Sojo alright?

Location: In this too warm, way too bright monitor room

Weather: Oh my god, who the hell cares?

Current Conditions: Fixing screens with a full cluster headache sucks !!

 

Elliott swears he will burn this stupid tower to the ground! How difficult is it to get a stupid chicken salad sandwich meal!? It didn’t help that he had to be Ms. Velvette’s pack mule to both of her meetings while managing appointments for Mr. Vox. Running back to the monitor room, he checks the time, 5:38. Less than an hour before Mr. Vox kills him.

Wait. What kind of talk is that? Sojourner will get it done in time. Elliott knows she will, she’s an expert. And nice too, she’s one of the nicest sinners, scratch that, people he’s ever met. “She can do it.” Elliott reassures himself and crosses the bridge.

“I swear, I’m not looking at another screen for at least five days.” Sojourner groans as she screws in the last bolt in the console. “Joseph and the Technicolor Coat, this was brutal.” Following the schematic, she presses the main power button. The VoxTek logo appears as one big image on all the screens. “And boom,” The bear flops in the large, black computer chair, exhausted. “Goes the dynamite.” The monitors connect to their respective image and function as normal.

“You did it.” Elliott breathes as he walks up beside the tired electrician, “You fixed everything before time ran out.”

Sojourner pulls out her bun and massages her scalp, yawning. “Yeah, man. You said your boss was gonna flip if this wasn’t up and running by 1830.” She runs her fingers through her braids. “I wasn’t gonna let that happen, hon.” She looks at the screens and realizes that they’re cameras. Everywhere. “Ugh, stalker.” She grimaces, each screen is somewhere in the city, “Does he creep on people all day like this?”

“VoxTek products provide the highest quality assurance, surveillance, entertainment, and security in all of Hell.” Elliott’s rehearsed answer tells Sojourner everything she needs to know, he’s under contract.

“I…I see.” She answers quietly, looking back at her new friend. Eying the take out box, her stomach growls. “You’ve got the right idea, I need to eat after this.” She looks through Hot Mic, ensuring all her tools are there.

Elliott snaps out of his trance, “Oh, actually, this is for you!” He holds out the box towards her, but stops when he sees Sojourner is busy. “I’ll put it right here for you.” The eel places the food on top of the console, hitting a button.

Loading data logs. The sound of people going to pound town plays on the surround sound speakers.

“What is- OH! GOOD LORD!! ” Sojourner gasps as very egregious pornography displays on all the monitors. Each video is from a first person angle and they all involve the same person. In one of the videos, a glitched out image of a tall man in an all red suit is shown stepping on what can only be a glowing, blue erection.

“AAAAAHHH, TURN OFF, TURN OFF, TURN OFF!” Elliott and Sojourner scream while slapping random buttons. In the throes of their panic, they manage to hit the mute button before Sojourner shrieks and hits the power button. The two friends stand there, out of breath and in complete shock. What the fuck was that, Vox’s dream log or something?

“Elliott, did I just fix this man’s goon corner?!” Sojourner digs through Hot Mic and dumps half of a bottle of hand sanitizer on her arms. “Is this his creeper cave!? I need answers!” 

The assistant stands paralyzed, his face is as red as his blazer. He just saw his boss’s… He covers his face and tries to calm himself. This can never be unseen.

“Yo, who the fuck was that red guy? Know what? No, do not tell me!” Sojourner paces back and forth, still reeling from the horrific images she just saw. ‘Boss Man is a bonafide freak!’ She opens the take out box and scarfs the sandwich down in an attempt to distract herself. The sandwich is warm and disgusting, but still better than most things Sojourner has eaten on  deployment. She chases the mushy sandwich down with the cup of applesauce, how is it both bland and bitter? 

Grabbing her water bottle, Sojourner chugs the rest of her water, letting the cold liquid shock her insides. “Oof.” She beats her chest with her fist, “Uuuugh, I ate way too fast.” She hunches over on her knees, trying to settle her stomach “Uuuurrgh…” Her stomach flops.

“Lewis! Get the fuck down to the news room, now!” Elliott jumps, hearing Vox’s voice through his earset.

“Uh, uh. Right away, sir!” The flustered eel stammers, he turns to Sojourner. “I-I have to go, I’ll send facilities to clean up the equipment.” He hands her a key card, “Use this to get to the lobby, it’s for the private elevator. Wait for me and I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

Sojourner takes the card, “Cool, let Freaky Boss Man know that everything works and I need him to sign for services complete.” She stands up and huffs, the nausea is still there. “I’ll be alright, hon. Go.” Elliott takes off. 

The electrician puts her coveralls back on and decides she’s too tired to roll up her sleeves. She gets inside the executive elevator, swipes the key card and hits the lobby button. Gathering her braids in her hands, the bear pulls them into a loose bun at the base of her neck. Wait, why is it going up? She hit the down button, didn’t she? The sleek doors open and a very tall sinner in a red coat with a heart spotted white lining steps in. 

Pressing button ‘B2’, he takes a long drag off the cigarette in his long gold and brown holder and exhales, texting away at his phone. A swirl of thick, red smoke clouds around him and nearly chokes Sojourner out. She tries her best to suppress her coughs, but the sound draws the man’s attention. Looking down, the sinner sees the small bear waving the smoke from her face. Her very pretty face.

“Hola, mamasita.” His suave voice purrs, a charming smile spreads across his smooth lavender face. Glowing red eyes shine behind gold-trimmed, heart- shaped glasses. “You lost?” His gold tooth glistens in the fluorescent red lighting.

“No, cough , no, I’m not lost. I’m just going to the coooough, cough, lobby.” Sojourner wheezes as she tries to breathe shallowly. ‘Goddamn, his smoke is strong.’

“Oh? And where did you just come from?” The stranger leans down to get a good look at her. ‘Round face; plump, dark lips; big, mismatched eyes.’ He half listens as his eyes scan Sojourner’s features, ‘Strong build, size D-DD, very curvy. Black girl, don’t have many of those.’  

“So, yeah, I’m just gonna…” Sojourner stretches and pushes the lobby button to get them moving again. The way this creep is leering at her, she needs to get off this elevator fast . 

The man lifts her hand to his face, “My name is Valentino,” He leaves a long kiss on top of her hand, “¿Cómo te llamas, bonita?” His long tongue slithers around her wrist, leaving a trail of red saliva in its wake.

Sojourner’s heart drops in her stomach, this is Valentino? Why the fuck did he just lick her? ‘Oh, shit. SHIT!’ This guy is dangerous, they’re in tight quarters, and she is in no condition to fight. ‘Play it dumb.’ The bear strategizes. “I’m sorry, what does that mean?” She tilts her head curiously. 

‘And she’s stupid. Perfect.’ “Your name, baby, what is your name?” Valentino explains brightly. He strokes her hand with his thumb. ‘She’s small and cute. I can definitely use this one.’

“Oh, okay. I got confused, I don’t speak German!” Sojourner smiles blankly.

Valentino stands up, taken aback, “¿Que cara-? I’m speaking Spanish, mama.”

Gasp! “Where did you learn that?” Sojourner asks excitedly, staring deeply into the moth’s eyes. Too deep, it’s weird and uncomfortable.

‘¡Oh, vaya! ¡Ella es muy estúpida!’ Valentino feels his brain going numb, this is a level of stupid that is rare even for him. “I-It’s my first language, mi amor.” He feels his eye starting to twitch.

Cough, cough. “ What’s the second?” The bear asks dumbly, refusing to break her intense eye contact.

Ding! The elevator doors open to the very crowded lobby.

“Oops, here’s my stop! Bye, Mr. Velcro!” Sojourner hops out and waves goodbye, smiling her brightest.

“Me llamo es Valenti-” The doors shut and continue down, cutting the overlord off.

“Air. I need air. Hrrrrk! ” Sojourner dry heaves as the smoke churns her stomach. She looks around the lobby, it’s loud, crowded, and there are flashing cameras everywhere. “Oh, come oooon!” The sailor whines. “Can’t a bitch catch a break? Where are you, uuuuurk , Elliott?” She scoots along the wall, looking for her tech themed friend.

_________

Six minutes earlier

Elliot looks in horror at the singed newsroom. What happened here? Did a fight break out or something? Katie and Tom look roughed up, more so Tom, who has severe burns on 80% of his body. Velvette starts a live feed while Vox stands fuming as he surveys the area.

“Lewis.” Vox says darkly.

Elliott snaps to attention, “Yes, Mr. Vox.” He’s amazed that his voice is staying even.

“Send Katie and Tom up to my office when they wake up.” The television demon folds his arms behind his back, he is still way too calm for the carnage around him. Vox is beyond pissed. “Tell Tom not to bother going to the hospital.”

“Ye-yes, sir.” Elliott shivers, knowing exactly what’s going to happen, there’s nothing he can do to help them.

Adjusting his cuffs, Vox pivots on his heel and gets right in his assistant’s face. “I’m going to check on my room now. I’ve run out of patience.” A cold grin curls on his screen and red pixelated drool runs down from his mouth. “That repairman better be done.” He whispers.

“Sh- she is!” Elliott stammers, holding the clipboard to his face. “Everything works and she’s waiting for you in the l-l-lobby, sir.”

Vox raises an eyebrow, “She?” He asks inquisitively. “She’s waiting?”

“S-s- Sojourner, sir.” A cold sweat breaks out on Elliott’s brow. “She’s already done with all the repairs, I saw it myself. Your cameras are back online.”

Vox looks skeptically at his assistant for a moment and zaps away, leaving him in the burned disarray of the newsroom. “Fuck. FUCK!” He can’t let Sojo face Vox alone, he’ll force her to make a deal with him. He grabs Katie’s blazer and slaps her, hard. “Wake up!” He barks. 

The news anchor wakes up hissing, all of her spider limbs splayed out in defense.

“Shut up!” Elliott spits, electricity crackles off him. “You and Tom get up to Vox’s office, now!” His voice leaves no room for argument as he drops her blazer. Katie stares at him shocked, Elliott has never even stuttered a peep at her before, now this?

“Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to, Stanley?” She demands as she holds her reddening cheek.

“MY NAME IS ELLIOTT!” BZZZT BZT CRACK!! Sinners yelp as cameras spark and a light blows out. “DON’T FUCK IT UP AGAIN!” Elliott snarls as electricity prickles her skin. He steps over the news anchor and runs to the elevator. Dead. “FUCK!” He sprints up the stairs to the lobby.

———————

Monitor room

“Holy shit.” Vox whispers as he inspects his repaired room. Everything is pristine, the cables are bundled neatly, his monitors are installed and now adjustable. He places his blue claw on his control console and feels the machine respond to him, it’s running faster than before. “Ha, ha. Well, would you look at that, and a girl no less!”

Hell, if this Stephanie girl can do this level of repair on her own before a deadline, then Vox has got to have her on his payroll. With her around, he won’t need a bumbling tech team. Plus, it’ll be easier to ensure Val doesn’t kill one person as opposed to eight.

“Alright, little lady, let’s have a chat.” Vox says to himself, already thinking up a contract as he zaps to the lobby.

———————

Lobby

“God, why are there so many of you here!?” Sojourner glares at the paparazzi as she tries to get some airflow in her hot clothes. “At least turn the flash off the cameras… or stop breathing through your mouths.” Her patience is non-existent at this point, she feels terrible, it’s too hot, and she’s using all her willpower not to puke.

The boisterous tabloids flare up when Vox enters the lobby, each reporter shouting questions or asking to look their way for a picture. The overlord flashes his best smile as he raises his hand to calm them down, “Now, now folks, I’d love to stay and chat, but there’s a new recruit I have to hire. Where is Stephanie Nave? I was told she’s in the lobby!” The crowd murmurs and begins looking among them for the missing guest. 

“Mr. Vox, who is Stephanie Nave?” A poodle with burgundy hair and mocha fur asks, holding her microphone to him.

“Is she the new cover girl for VoxTech Magazine?” A sinner who looks like a Newsie's lamppost questions, holding his notepad up for an answer. “What’s next for Channel 666 after the fight in the newsroom?”

“Is Stephanie the headliner for Velvette’s new line?” Another voice calls out as a million questions are thrown out at once as the cameras start up again. “What are your thoughts on the princess’s pet project?”

‘Oh my fuck, they’re so loud!’ Sojourner groans and presses her hands against her ears, “Elliott, where are you?” She leans her head against the corner of the walls, counteracting the building pressure.

The eel in question bursts through the stairs entrance, out of breath but determined. Physical exertion already isn’t his forte, so sprinting up six flights of stairs has him gassed. Looking past the large crowd, he hears Vox answering questions. The private elevator dings, letting Velvette and Valentino exit, the fashion diva is still on her live feed. 

‘Fuck, fuck!’ Elliott has to find Sojourner now, it’s over if Val sees her. He scoots along the wall, hoping she did the same. “Sojo? Sojo!” He whispers as to not interrupt his boss. The assistant sighs in relief when he sees his friend huddled in the corner, she has her forehead against the wall with her hands over her ears. ‘Her headache is getting worse.’ He tiptoes past the crowd to the far side of the room, trying not to draw Vox’s attention as he speaks. 

Gently, Elliott taps Sojourner’s shoulder, she turns and looks up, “C’mon, I’ve got to get you out of here. You’re in danger!” He whispers urgently, his plan is to take her downstairs to the front and have Vox sign the closing contract there. It will give Sojourner a better chance of getting away before the overlord can propose a deal or worse, hypnotize her.

“Well, this remarkable girl is the prospective new lead of my maintenance and innovations team!” Vox boasts proudly, “I’ve never seen higher quality repairs done in such a short amount of time. And all on her own! Now, if I can just find her, ah!” Vox spots his assistant in the corner of his eye, he’s leading someone to the stairs. “Lewis! Is that her?” The duo freeze in their tracks.

Elliott’s heart drops when he hears his boss. So close, they were so close to the door, his red and black eyes squeeze shut. “I’m so sorry, Sojo.” He whispers in defeat. “Y-yes, sir.” The eel answers obediently, “This is Sojourner Knight.” He introduces the electrician to the overlord, he holds her steady when she loses her balance for a moment.

“Well, don’t hog her all to yourself, bring her over!” Vox smiles brightly and waves them over. Elliott reluctantly leads the bear to the center of the room, releasing her shoulders as she walks up to his boss. Sweat pours down the sides of his face as he hugs his clipboard to his chest.

The bear takes a deep breath to steady herself as she approaches the T.V. Demon, he is so much taller in real life. The flashing cameras send sharp stabs of pain to her eyes as she raises her hand to shield them. “Good afternoon, Mr. Vox, my name is Sojourner. Thank you for trusting Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electrical Repairs with your property.” She fights not to squint her eyes when looking up at the CEO, his screen is so damn bright.

“Sojourner! My mistake, I thought your name was Stephanie. Slip of the tongue right, folks?” The crowd laughs in agreement.

‘The fuck is this? A talk show?’ Sojourner thinks, a skeptical glance is thrown at the audience. “No problem, it’s not a very common name.” She pulls her tablet out of Hot Mic. “May I please get your autograph?” Sojourner asks sweetly and slips her tablet into Vox’s blue claws. “I take it you’re happy with the repairs?”

“Am I ever! To think you did that all in one day, very impressive, my dear!” Vox praises enthusiastically, mindlessly scribbling his name, “My own repair team couldn’t pull off what you did today.”

‘Cuz your girl friday done killed the fuck outta ‘em.’ “You’re too kind, sir. Thank you.” Sojourner puts on her best bashful smile and takes her tablet back. An uneasy feeling creeps into Sojourner’s mind, Vox is being way too friendly for her liking. The way Elliott warned her of danger and the way he’s sweet talking reminds her of the times when her dad, Charles, would hype her up in public then put her on the spot. This is a trap. ‘That’s why Elliott was trying to get me out of here. He’s going to strike a deal.’ “I take pride in my work and in my business, I want to give my customers the best quality service at the most manageable prices.”

Vox snaps his neon claws, “Ah, I knew it, I knew I liked you. We think alike, you and I. Quality assurance is a top priority for the both of us.”

“Couldn’t be more right.” The sailor nods. Oof, that action was a mistake, she’s dizzy again. “That’s why I love being my own boss. Like you!” A dry heave lurches in her chest. ‘Oh god, no.’ She lifts her fist to her mouth and takes some deep breaths. It’s happening, she needs to leave, her mouth is already starting to water.

‘Oh my fuck, please no.’ Elliott begs to himself as he watches Sojourner dry heave. “Don’t throw up.” He whispers to himself and frantically looks for any type of container. “Please, don’t throw up!”

The television host’s smile tightens, “Right again, little lady! Man, where were you when I was starting up VoxTek?” A tick of annoyance crosses Vox’s mind. What was that comment for? Did this bitch figure him out? “But I’m curious, have you ever wanted to do something…bigger?” He flares his hands to convey his message. “Fixing pipes and cars is great, noble even! But what if you can spread your level of quality craftsmanship to the entirety of Hell? I can make that happen. I want you, Sojourner Knight, as my new head of maintenance and quality assurance!” A round of applause erupts as the paparazzi cheers for them and snaps pictures. 

‘I fuckin’ knew it!’ Sojourner looks at the cheering crowd, their sharp claps make her ears ring. Her lip starts to quiver, she can’t open her mouth. If she does, it’ll all come out. She dry heaves again, liquid rises to her throat. 

Vox takes her hand in a strong grip and gives a threatening smile, “How’s about it, Sojourner? I only want the best and that means I want you on my team.” Sojourner clenches her jaw, shakes her head slowly,  and turns away, his screen is way too bright. “Aw, sweetheart, don’t be bashful!” Vox coos as he painfully squeezes her hand and turns to the crowd. “Isn’t she the cutest?” His left eye pulses hypnotically, the audience all nod and clamour in unison.

Elliott successfully finds a waste bin in the far corner of the room and shoves through the compacted crowd, “Move, move!” He hisses. Almost there, just a few more feet.

“Sojourner~.” Vox’s rich voice sings-songs as he leans down to her eye level. “ Look at me.” The hypnotic waves of his voice compels the bear to look him in the eyes. The swirling pattern pulls her in, “ You want to work for me, don’t you?” Vox drones as he leans in, “Answer m-”

BLLUUURRRGGGH! A fountain of vomit rockets onto the overlord’s screen. Water, applesauce, and a chewed up chicken salad sandwich splatter onto Vox’s face and spill down his chest. The media demon screams and springs back up, spitting the unwelcomed fluid out of his mouth. HUUUUURRRRK BLEGH! Another round of puke spews all over his custom- tailored, pinstripe, blue suit. GAAACCK! BLECH, COUGH, COUGH, UUUUUURRRACK! The final spewing lands on Vox’s blue-trimmed, heeled boots. The audience snaps out of their trance and stands there, all mouths agape.

Sojourner’s head is pounding and her ears are ringing, but at least the nausea is gone. Resting her hands on her knees, she drags her sleeve across her mouth and clears her throat. It’s been a while since she’s puked like that. Wait, she just puked, on the C.E.O of the biggest media and technology company in Pride. Her mouth drops open as the seven foot tall mess stands glitching before her. The ringing in her ears fades out and Vox is cussing. Like a lot. Holy shit is he saying some rude things right now.

Valentino and Velette stare in complete disbelief as Vox loses his shit and wipes projectile puke off his face. Pa-king, pa-king,pa-kingpa-kingpa-kingpa-kingpa-kingpa-king! The social media overlord’s phone chimes non-stop, she looks down and dread engulfs her. Velvette is still live-streaming. Comments and stickers are pouring in as her views skyrocket into the 10,000’s. She’s stuck at a crossroads, does she end the stream now and preserve what’s left of Vox’s dignity or does she let it go more viral? ‘Well, people ‘ave already seen it so~.’ The fashionista holds her phone higher for a better angle. 

Valentino watches the chaotic scene, so that’s her name, Sojourner. ‘Well, isn’t she a little trickster?’ The moth thinks back to her behavior in the elevator, he grins. ‘Clever girl.’ He adjusts his glasses and taps the ash off the end of his cigarette. “She has a bit of a gag reflex, but we can work on that.” He shrugs, “I don’t think she’s in much shape to discuss any more business today though, I’ll find her later.” He snaps a pic of Sojourner.

“Holy shit, I just reached 75,000 views!” Velvette exclaims as she takes a selfie with Vox and Sojourner in the background.

“Do you think people would be into ‘puke play’?” The pimp overlord asks as he searches on his phone. “I know there’s a kink for that.” He takes another drag off his cigarette.

“YOU DISGUSTING BITCH!” Vox snarls as he swipes the vomit off his front. The smell is abhorrent and now his mouth is slimy. HUUUURK! GAG! He dry heaves violently, he leans on his knees and immediately recoils because of the puke on his legs. “WH- WHAT THE FUCK UUURK! IS WRONG WITH YOU?”

Sojourner glares hotly at the filthy man, “Fuck you, iPad! If you hadn’t tried to pull that sneaky shit just now, I would’ve just puked on the floor!” She snaps back. “And fuck you further for trying to pin me down in a deal like that! I would never work for a weird sicko like you! Your freaky Diddy computer is reason enough alone to say hell naw!” She reaches into Hot Mic and grabs her wallet. Plucking out $300, she tosses it at his chest “For the dry cleaning. Pay your bill and never contact me again!” Sojourner hits a right face and marches to the stairs, slamming the door open. “Thanks for using Devil’s Dog Mechanical… electrics. Whatever! ¡Espero que alto pervertido de disparé de nuevo! Like what kind of freaky sh-” click. The sailor’s voice can be heard echoing in the stairwell, cursing Vox’s name all the way down in both English and Espanol. 

Valentino grins in delight, “That sneaky little shit!” He laughs, “¡Me gusta eso osita!”

Vox stares at the door as it softly closes, puke drips off him as he processes what just happened. FWASH! The light of a camera goes off. The TV Demon slowly turns to the culprit. A trembling chimpanzee sinner lowers his camera, quickly realizing his mistake. Electricity crackles off the overlord’s form as a deranged look spreads on his face.

Elliott dives into the stairwell while Velvette and Valentino scramble inside the elevator. The lobby is destroyed and all the news reporting sinners lay dead on the floor, burnt to a crisp by electrocution.

Sojourner slams her car door close and shoves the key into the ignition, “Piece of shit, perverted, swindlin’, assho-” BZZZZZZT! BOOM! A bright flash erupts from V-Tower and the whole block goes dark. The electrician throws her hands up in exasperation, “All that work and he fuckin’ fries it?” She starts up her van and drives home, completely over today. Later on, she exits the shower and enters her bedroom, ready to turn in for the night. Checking her phone for the last time before bed, she’s relieved that Elliott is safe and switches over to sinstagram. She has over 150 new messages on her page, her mouth falls open as she scrolls through the requests for jobs.

“Holy shit.” The sailor whispers as she adjusts her bonnet. Comments and video responses of today’s ‘incident’ with Vox are a mixture of praises, jeers, and general discussion. “There’s already a remix?” She exclaims as she continues to scroll.

A DM appears in her inbox, it’s a video of Velvette’s and Valentino’s faces while Vox can be heard throwing a tantrum and possibly a few items as he curses Sojourner’s name. The caption under the video says, “Care for an interview?” The bear deletes the message and blocks the sender and heads downstairs.

She unplugs her TV and tosses it in the garage, there’s never anything good on anyway.

Notes:

Thar she blows! In her defense, she shook her head no and tried looking away. I will say, I love Vox and the others as villians and I can't wait to make them HORRENDOUS as the story goes on.

Chapter 48: A Small Favor

Summary:

Lucifer is livin' his best depressed life day by day. He was doing just barely okay until he received a call that turned his anxiety up to 13

Notes:

This week was my first returning from quarantine. I'm still dealing with a bunch of medical issues but I'm making it work as best as I can. Sorry for the late update!

Date: August 22, 2025

Age: Ancient

Location: Grand Palace

Weather: Hotter than Hell, get it? It’s a joke because we’re in… oh fuck it, nevermind.

Current Conditions: Trying to exist (And horribly failing.)

 

“Yeah well, how does it feel now that I’ve got your pen, huh? Bitch!” Lucifer snorts as he rewinds the video again. “Yeah well, how does it feel now that I’ve got your pen, huh? Bitch!”  

“That’s my girl.” The angel sighs affectionately, “Sassy, just like your mom.” He watches Charlie flip and kick that spider bitch off of her and then lunge into a tackle. Lucifer smiles, this reminds him of how his little duckling used to fight him when it was time to put on pajamas. She had a mean kick then too, it almost hurt sometimes.

“RAAAAAAAAA!!” Charlie’s battle cry roars out as she grips Kallie Kickjam’s hair and slams her head into the news anchor’s desk, knocking her unconscious. A girl with long gray and white hair tied with a red bow runs up and drags his daughter away before she can curbstomp the spider into the ground. The video cuts out.

Despite how proud he is that Charlie stood up for herself, Lucifer is embarrassed by her idea. What is she thinking? Sinners can’t be redeemed, they’re down here for a reason. Where in the hell did she get such an idea in the first place? 

“Is this what she wanted to talk to me about during lunch in the garden?” Lucifer asks himself as he spins around on his stool. “What do you think duck # 541?” The rubber duck with an unicycle says nothing. Of course it says nothing, it’s a fucking rubber duck. “Uuuuuuugh~.” The king groans and folds his arms on his workbench, why the hell did he bring that back up? He knows it only makes him feel worse and anxious. 

“IT MATTERS TO ME!” Lucifer can hear Charlie’s anger echo in his head. She had never raised her voice to him like that before, she sounds so much like Lilith when she’s angry. How long has it been since Lucifer has seen his daughter in person? Once, maybe twice in… holy shit, nearly seven years. That’s how long ago his beloved wife, well, ex-wife had left him. Seven whole years, where has the time gone? Sad, yellow eyes scan his bedroom, the number of rubber ducks has doubled in amount. Ah, so that’s where the time went, good to know it wasn’t wasted. 

A wave of gloom erupts in Lucifer’s chest and his body suddenly feels heavy, “I’m going to bed.” He sighs to no one in particular and pulls off his bowtie. Why did he bother even getting dressed? It’s not like he goes anywhere besides to Belphegor's occasionally. Even then, that’s only when Ozzie and Bee kidnap him to go see her. He remembers the first time they came to see him, they were checking up on him because Charlie was worried. Does Charlie even still think about him? ‘I doubt it.’ Lucifer thinks miserably as he crawls under the covers. The angel lays there waiting for sleep to take him, a million thoughts bang around in his mind, each one louder and more negative than the next. 

“Think about something else.” Lucifer coaches himself, “What are ya gonna eat tomorrow? Maybe go on a walk outside. Ugh, no.” His beautiful face scrunches in disgust, “Make some tea? Give Charlie a call?” Anxiety spikes and Lucifer’s heart begins to race with fear. “Nope! No! No, no, no! Ahem. No.” Well this sucks, now he’s wide awake and exhausted. “What the fuck is wrong with me? How can I be soooo fucking tired and awake at the damn same time?” He exclaims as he throws his darkened hands in the air. “Heaven never has to deal with any of this shit! No one in Heaven does! What the fuck, Dad?” 

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man runnin’ the stand-. 

Lucifer answers his phone without looking, “Whaaaat?” He whines. 

“Sup, you little shit?” A crass voice answers on the other end of the line, “You sound like absolute shit. Ha, ha, ha.”

‘Oh fuck me with a lamppost, not you.’ The angel groans inwardly before sitting up, “The fuck do you want, Adam?” Lucifer is already done with this conversation. He feels terrible and the last person in the universe he wants to talk to is the first man.

“I just wanna chat for a sec, can’t two guys just catch up?” Adam taunts as he stuffs a rib in his mouth, “What? Ya busy o’ somefin?” Lucifer grimaces, he just knows there’s pork or beef flying from that pig’s mouth. He can almost smell the rocker’s hot breath, like root beer and grease. 

Lucifer suppresses a gag and shudders, “Get to the point or I’m hanging up, fucker.” He growls.

“Alright, alright, jeez, get the plug outta of your tight ass, would ya? I’m givin’ you a ring to tell you that I’m comin’ down tomorrow for a meeting at 10:00, got some updates for you and your kingdom. So be there.” Adam’s pleasant tone drops immediately. “Sup, sexy?” A door can be heard opening and footsteps walk in. “How was the farm? Build anything cool?”

“I told you not to call me that.” An annoyed voice replies. Lucifer heart drops, is that…? “Who’s on the phone?”  

“Just some loser me and Danger Tits gotta go meet tomorrow, nothin’ special.” Adam snorts, a tool box is placed down nearby and the footsteps approach. 

“For the last time, her name is Lute!” The voice gets closer, “Wait, are they still on the line?”

“Uh, yeah?” The first man answers, confused, “So what?”

“And you called them a loser? Oh, for fuck’s sake, Adam!” The voice exclaims, “Hello? Please, excuse Adam and his rude behavior! I apologize!”

Lucifer chokes up and tears immediately well up in his eyes, ‘Michael?’ He can’t bring himself to speak.

“Hello? I think they hung up. What is wrong with you, Ad-.”

The king hangs up and turns off his phone. He stares at the dark screen as tears spill over, that was Michael, his twin brother. The scars all over the angel’s body begin to sting and ache, his wings spring out with his control and wrap tightly around himself. Nothing could’ve prepared him for that. Lucifer shakes violently, it’s suddenly too tight in his wings, too hot. He scrambles out of bed and unfurls his wings, now he’s too exposed. It’s hard to breathe. The angel is suddenly too aware of his body, his skin is too much. Too much of what, he’ll never know. 

Squeak!

Lucifer screams and jumps, when did that rubber duck get there? He looks around wildly, the room is too crowded and way too yellow. It’s terrifying. He scrambles to his phone and turns it back on. 

Brrrriing, brrrring, brrr- “Hey, Lulu!” A cheerful voice answers, “What going on, baby?”

“Ozzie?” Lucifer chokes, “I-I can’t… huffhuffhuff Ozzie!” He drops to his knees and sobs.

“Don’t move! I’m coming!” A portal opens and the deadly sin rushes through, “I’m here, what’s wron-” Lucifer wraps his arms around him and squeezes. Ozzie grits through the pain and wraps his arms around the king and lets him cry. 

An hour later, the fallen angel is asleep on Belphegor’s massive form, her wool cradles him as a halo of magenta candles hover over him. “What set him off, Asmodeus?” Belphegor’s gentle voice whispers as Asmodeus sits beside her.

“I have no idea, he’s the one who called me and by then he was already panicking.” The Sin replies, “This was the worst attack so far.” He frowns, remembering how broken Lucifer sounded on the phone. “His wings were out and everything.”

“Could Charlie have called him?” Belphegor suggests.

“Maybe, lemme check.” Asmodeus grabs Lucifer’s phone through his portal and opens the call log. “Aw, shit.” he groans.

“What? What is it?” The giant lamb asks. Asmodeus turns the phone so his sister can see the screen, “Oh, bother.” She miffs as she reads Adam’s name on the call log. Well, the caller ID says “First Fuck-Up”, but the Sins know it’s Adam. “What could he have possibly said to Lucifer to upset him so much?”

“I have no clue.” Asmodeus scratches his head in thought, then an idea dawns on him. “Maybe he said somethin’ about her . The anniversary of her leaving just passed.”

“Does he know that she left?” Belphegor asks, she doesn’t see how in the world Adam could, but there’s always a possibility.

“The man is a gold-medalist in being an idiot, ain’t no way.” Asmodeus scoffs at the idea, “Who would tell ‘em?”

The Queen of Sloth sighs, “Someone who wishes to harm him.” She answers, “Lucifer may be king, but that doesn’t mean everyone respects him or wants best for him.” Belphegor lifts her head to look at the king, his angelic face contorts as he fights through a nightmare. “Whatever set him off was serious, I can’t stop the nightmare he’s having.” 

“Can you see what’s happening?” Asmodeus asks, leaning over to look at Lucifer.

Belphegor shakes her head, “Unless I am given permission, I cannot see into his dreamscape.” She sighs sadly, “Perhaps I can do a divination when he awakes. Only if he feels up to it, of course.”

“I understand, Belli.” The Lust King concedes. Harder, daddy! Oh, yeah! “Hello, this is Ozzie.” Belphegor blushes hard at the erotic ringtone as she hears a gravelly voice exclaim on the phone. “What, again? Damn it, I’ll be right there, baby.” Asmodeus sighs and hangs up. “I swear that damn pipe will be the death of me. It burst again and now there’s melon- flavored lube, everywhere! ”

Belphegor raises an eyebrow in surprise, “Baby?” She asks, amused.

Asmodeus freezes at his slip of the tongue, ahem . “Oh, you know me. I-I just love- like! I like to give pet names!” The Sin stammers as a yellow blush spreads on his face. “Anyway, there’s an emergency at my factory, call me when Lucifer wakes up, I’ll text you later, Bel, bye!” The lustful rooster rambles as he jumps through his portal and closes it.

Belphegor smiles warmly, “I always knew you were a lover, Ozzie.” She chuckles as she lays her head down and closes her eyes. “I can’t wait to meet them someday.” Yawning deeply, she falls asleep.

______________

0948, August 23, 2025, Belphegor’s kitchen

 

The next morning, Lucifer sips peppermint tea and nibbles on his toast with apple marmalade at the breakfast nook. The dark rings around his eyes are set in deep and his glowing porcelain skin is lackluster. His rosy cheeks are dull and his platinum blond hair is all over his head. Blinking one eye at a time, he takes another sip of his tea when Belphegor joins him with her own cup.

“Lucifer, you need to call her.” The lamb urges, placing her hoof on his hand, “You are in no condition to go to that meeting.”

Yellow eyes slide over to her, he knows she’s right but isn’t sure if he can handle calling her.

“Either call Charlie or go see Adam yourself.” Belphegor challenges before taking a sip of her tea, “The choice is yours, but it needs to be made right now.” 

Lucifer head thunks on the table, slightly disturbing the dishware, “Uuuuuuuggh.” He groans, giving in. He holds his hand up, “May I have my phone please?” His voice is muffled as he talks against the hard surface. Belphegor places his phone in his outstretched hand, watching him press the “Duckling” caller ID.

“Hello? Dad?” Charlie’s sweet voice answers.

“Heeeey, Char-Char.” Lucifer greets, his voice tightens immediately, “How ya doin’ kiddo?”

“Uuuuh, pretty uh, pretty good. How are you?” The princess awkwardly answers. 

“Oh, I’m doin’ great! Just fine!” The king lies as sweat beads on his forehead. Belphegor places a supportive hand on his shoulder, nodding in encouragement. “Listen, I kinda need your help. I have a meeting at the angelic embassy in about 10 minutes, but I’m with Auntie Bel right now. Can you go to the meeting for me, please? It would be a big help.”

He hears her gasp sharply, “Oh wow, really? Yes! Yeah, I’ll go. Just leave it to me!” Charlie says excitedly, “I gotta go, I’ll talk to you later!”

Lucifer smiles softly, “Talk to you later, Ducky. I love y-” The line goes dead. “-ou.” He finishes quietly. “Love you, kid.” The angel looks sadly at his phone.

Belphegor rubs her thumb on his shoulder. “You did a good job, Lucifer.” She pats him gently, “Very good.” 

The king sighs sadly, “I’m really tired, Bel.” He mutters. 

“Finish your tea and toast then you can go lie down.” She coaches, sliding his plate closer to him. “Maybe after your nap, you and I can go on a walk?”

Lucifer mulls the suggestion over and nods.

“I think I’d like that very much.”

Notes:

I came up with an explanation for why Lucifer asked Charlie to go in his place. I'm pretty proud of it!

Chapter 49: An Okay Day in Hell

Summary:

Sojourner takes on a new client in a part of Pride Ring she's never dared to visit: Cannibal Town.

The song in this chapter is the wonder Bessie Smith's Nobody Knows You when You're Down and Out
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxTyV_cBz7o&list=RDkxTyV_cBz7o&start_radio=1&pp=ygU2YmVzc2llIHNtaXRoIG5vYm9keSBrbm93cyB5b3Ugd2hlbiB5b3UncmUgZG93biBhbmQgb3V0oAcB

Notes:

I adored writing this chapter! Rosie is such a peach to write. I can only hope I did our Darling Overlord justice!

Chapter 49 An Okay Day in Hell

Date: August 23, 2025

Age: 36 years old had she stayed alive

Location: On the streets of Uptown Pentagram City

Weather: An abnormally sunny day

Current Conditions: Trying not to shit bricks

 

Tp,tp,tp,tp,tp Sojourner’s thumb taps nervously on her steering wheel as her left leg bounces with anxiety. “What the fuck was I thinking?” She yells at herself, “Like, girl , seriously. Why did I say yes?” Her hand tightens around the wheel as she bites the thumbnail of the other. “They’re freaking cannibals! ” 

___________

20 minutes earlier, Tinker, Tailor, Sewing Spy- Tailor and Garment Repairs

 

“Merci beaucoup, Mme Vera.” Sojourner thanks as she accepts her newly repaired coveralls from the chic hedgehog, “And I gave you the bon-bons, yes?”

“Oui! Please tell Mme Eggy I would like to order in bulk, s’il te plaît.” The seamstress smiles as she pops another chocolate bon-bon into her mouth. “Ils sont magnifiques!”

“I can give you her number, she does much more than just finger treats.” Sojourner pulls out Eggy’s business card and hands it to Vera, “She’s very skilled in all types of dessert cuisines, but I know French is one of her signatures.”

“Comme c’est merveilluex!” Vera cheers excitedly, “I shall call her immediately. Merci, chéri.” She carefully plants a kiss on each of Sojourner’s cheeks, “Merci!” She holds the bear's face lovingly in her manicured hands, wiping off the excess make-up off her dark brown fur.

It’s electric! You can’t hear it. It’s electric! You gotta feel it. It’s elec-  

“Hello, Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electrical Repairs, this Sojourner speaking, how may I help you?”

Vera releases the electrician and chuckles as she walks back to her counter, preparing to make a phone call herself.

“Oh, so professional! Hello, darling.” A nasally voice with a New Yorker accent replies back to her. “My name is Rosie and I’m curious, do you have any experience with signs and roof repair?”  

“Hello, ma’am, it’s lovely to meet you. Yes, I have experience in both. What do you need done?”

“Ma’am? So polite, my goodness!” Sojourner can hear Rosie’s smile through the phone. “Well, Frankie, my latest husband, up and died on me this most recent extermination day. So I need the sign changed.”

Sojourner’s heart squeezes painfully, her voice catches, “Oh, I’m so sorry for your loss.” She says softly. Flashes of Gunny run through her head, making her fight back tears.

“Eh. Ya lose one husband, ya get another.” Rosie sighs, hearing the sadness in the bear’s tone. “Ya lose someone, sweetie?”

The sailor clears her throat and blinks away her tears, “Yeah, but haven’t we all? Anyways, what can I do to help you?” She quickly deflects. 

“I need someone to come take the old sign off my store front and replace it with the new one. Plus, those damn exorcists messed up a lot of buildings in town and killed my roofers.” Rosie explains, annoyance creeps into her voice. “Think you’re up for the job?”

“I can do the sign in a day, depending on how big it is.” Sojourner pulls up her calendar on her tablet. “The roofs will have to be a multi-visit work order. Can I meet with you to pencil in some dates? Are you available tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow will be fantastic! Does 9:30 work for you?” Rosie exclaims happily.

“9:30 works perfectly, where can I meet you?” Sojourner opens the maps app on her hell-phone.

“My shop is called Rosie’s Emporium! Dead center of town, can’t miss it!” The shop owner explains, “I let the others know you’re coming, so there won’t be any confusion. I’ll see you, doll. Bye!” The delightful woman hangs up.

The electrician types the shop name into her map and waits for the location to pull up, “I don’t think I’ve seen her shop anywhere.” She mutters, “She said in town, but the only ‘town’ here is GASP!! ” An icy chill seizes her body, “C-C-Cannibal Town?!” Her shriek scares Vera and makes the hedgehog almost drop her phone.

____________

Current time

 

“It’ll be fine, everything’s fine.” Sojourner attempts to self-soothe as she drives down the streets of uptown to the industrial district. She turns the radio off, it's too overwhelming right now, she needs silence. The traffic starts to pile up near the junction of Uptown and the entertainment district, so the electrician decides to cut through downtown. She stops at a red light and immediately horns start blowing. Rolling her eyes, Sojourner rests her head on her fist as she waits for cars to pass. 

Music can be heard approaching in the distance, “Is that a band?” Sojourner sits up and leans to look down the intersection. The music gets louder, a girl is singing. “-Be a happy day in Hell!” A young woman in a red suit is smiling while she rides on the back of a postal truck, waving her arm as she sings. The music fades as the postal truck drives away. 

Sojourner sits there stunned, “The fuck was that?” She continues down the street, “Where did that music come from?”

_________

Industrial District, Sir Pentious’s War Machine

 

“You’ll see, my dear. Tomorrow, I shall take on the Radio Demon and finally be recognized asss an equal to the Veess” The snake declares as they put the finishing touches on repairs.

“Pen, this guy absolutely demolished your last war machine within seconds.” Sojourner argues as she tightens down a bolt. “Plus, it took you 18 hours to emerge from the shadow dimension he sent you to.”

The inventor’s red eyes gloss over as he remembers the nightmarescape he had to fight through in order to escape. If he hadn’t had his ray gun on him, he probably would still be there. “Y-yess well, thisss time, I will win!” He exclaims, “Thessse new modificationsss shall ensssure victory for the Great Sssir Peentiouss!”

Sojourner sighs, she knows there’s no talking sense into him when he’s like this, “Well, Mr. Inventor, I wish you a marvelous victory.” She puts her socket ratchet back in Hot Mic and smiles at her friend.

“Thank you, Ssssojourner.” Sir Pentious appreciates her support and encouragement, “I feel confident and prepared.” He slithers beside her as she walks to the exit.

“And confidence is half the battle.” She chuckles as she looks up to her friend, “Be careful and give him hell.”

“That I shall!” The snake exclaims.

He didn’t. He got his ass beat immediately and he was launched across the city.

___________

August 24, 2025, Cannibal Town, Rosie’s Emporium

 

“Are you sure it’s alright if I use your garden?” Sojourner verifies, walking with the tall overlord, “Won’t your guests be disturbed by the noise?”

Rosie smiles down at the electrician, Zestial and Carmilla were right, she really is a sweet girl. “Now don’t you worry about them, dearie.” She taps the bear’s black nose, “Everyone is expecting you and knows you’re here to do maintenance, you do whatever you gotta do.” The small bear smiles back and nods, “Y’know, I really appreciate you showing up. Most people run for the hills once they realize we’re in Cannibal Town.”

Sojourner looks down ashamed, “I’ll be honest, I had a nervous breakdown too when I figured it out. But my friend, Toner, pointed out that you already ensured my safety when you said you’d make an announcement for me.” She looks Rosie in her inky, black eyes, “I’m sorry for the presumptions I made about your town. That was irresponsible of me.”

The gentlewoman beams and pulls the short sinner into a tight hug, “Oh, apology accepted, darling!” She squeezes her, “You are so sweet, I could just eat you up.”

“Huh?!” Sojourner’s gasp muffles against Rosie’s bust.

“Oops, not really, sweetie. Not really.” The overlord reassures her and laughs, “Sorry, poor choice of words.”

Sojourner pauses for a moment then breaks into laughter, “No, no, that’s a good one! The best part is you didn’t mean it that way.” She giggles. The two women enjoy their laugh before Sojourner calms down and places her hands on her hips. “I’ll go get started on your sign, tap me on the shoulder if you need anything, I’ll have my headphones in.”

“Of course, darling. I’ll bring some tea out for you, later.” Rosie waves as Sojourner exits through the backdoor to the garden.

Looking around the beautiful backyard, the electrician takes in the rows of beautiful rose bushes that line the white picket fence around the property. How long has it been since she’s seen an actual fenced yard? Even when she was alive, she hadn’t seen a garden since she was in her twenties. “Was that when I was stationed in Norfolk?” The sailor ponders as she approaches the damaged sign. There’s a large black X over Franklin’s name. “Rest in peace, sir.” Sojourner whispers as takes out her metallic scraper. “Sorry about this.” She puts in her earbuds and hits play on her vintage playlist, it fits the theme of the lovely town. 

Alastor hums and twirls his cane as he walks down the streets of Cannibal Town. He is overly pleased to see that it hadn’t lost its charm, the buildings and people have the same aesthetic despite being new. 

“Good morning, Alastor.” A band of ladies greet before descending upon their victim and rip him apart with their sharp teeth. The unfortunate sinner screams in pain before one of the women rips his throat out, swallowing it whole.

“Hello, ladies, don’t you all look ravishing today?” The Radio Demon beams cheerfully, “Is Rosie in?”

A brunette with a mauve feathered cap and plum colored dress sits up with a piece of intestine hanging out of her mouth. She politely tucks the organ into her mouth and opens her fan to cover her face. “Yes! She’s in her store with our special guest.”

A wide grin spreads on the deer’s face, “A special guest, you say? How interesting! Enjoy your meal, ladies!” Alastor bows to them and excuses himself, continuing down the street.

“Bye, Alastor.” The women sigh, watching as the tall demon strut away.

Twirling his cane again, Alastor sees the back of Rosie’s Emporium in his sights, the garden looks serene as always. He takes a deep breath of content, it is so nice to be back. Passing the picket fence, music makes Alastor stop in his tracks. 

“Nobody knows you when you’re down and out.

In my pocket not one penny

And my friends I haven’t any.

But if I ever get on my feet again.”

‘Bessie Smith? What impeccable taste!’ Alastor looks over the fence and sees a small sinner singing quietly to herself. ‘Lost in her own little world.’ Her back is turned to him as she leans over the sign and presses the last letter on. Her alto voice carries the blues beautifully.

“Then I’ll meet my long lost friend

It’s mighty strange, without a doubt.

Nobody knows you when you’re down and out.”

“I mean when you down and out!” Alastor sings along happily, chuckling as he watches her jump and whip around to look at him. Red and green eyes meet his red ones with surprise as she pulls little black devices out of her fuzzy ears. He tucks his microphone under his arm as he gives the woman a round of applause with sound effects, “My dear, I haven’t heard that song in quite some time. I thought it was Ms. Bessie Smith herself until I saw you!” 

Sojourner stands up to face the visitor, immediately recognizing the all red attire. “I, uh, I didn’t realize you were there.” She stammers, remembering Vox’s computer. “Sorry, I had my earbuds in, otherwise I would’ve said hello.”

“Oh, it’s quite alright, sweetheart. Your singing is greeting enough for me!” Alastor unlatches the fence's door and enters the garden. “And what a lovely voice you have. Classic alto, a true vintage!”

The sailor feels her face heat up, she’s not used to receiving compliments like this, he seems to mean them. “You’re too kind, really.” She laughs awkwardly, “Thank you, though. I appreciate it.”

“Of course, darling. But where are my manners? The name’s Alastor, it’s a pleasure to meet you, my dear, quite a pleasure.” The red demon offers his hand to her.

Cautiously, the bear grabs it and gives a firm handshake, “Sojourner, it’s nice to meet you, Alastor. So you listen to blues as well?”

Alastor’s eyes light up with delight, “I most certainly do! It’s one of the only proper genres of music in my opinion!” He replies enthusiastically, “You must be our special guest I just heard about.”

The bear nods and tucks her tools back into Hot Mic, “I am. I just fixed Rosie’s sign and will be repairing roofs throughout the next few weeks.”

“How splendid! Rosie does have an eye for spotting talent, the sign looks marvelous.”

The backdoor opens and Rosie steps out holding two cups of rosehip tea. “Tea time, my sweet-” The cannibal overlord gasps and almost drops the tray when her eyes land on the red clad man. “Alastor?” She whispers, taking a moment to gather herself. “Alastor!” She cries and sets the tray on a nearby table, nearly missing it. The large feathered hat flies off Rosie’s head as she runs to her long absent friend, pulling him into her arms.

“Hello, Rosie.” Alastor says softly, hugging her back. The two friends hold each other for a while. Rosie sniffles as tears run down her beautiful face. “It’s been too long.” He says, squeezing her tighter.

Sojourner quietly excuses herself indoors to give the two some privacy. She watches as Alastor wipes a tear from Rosie’s cheek before handing her his handkerchief. They both look so happy, their expressions are soft, they’re smiling with their eyes. “They really care about each other.” Sojourner murmurs as she turns away from the window, a wave of melancholy hits her as Gunny’s face springs to the forefront of her memory. Closing her eyes, she remembers the rhythm of his heartbeat, ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-

“Who the hell are you?” A crass, sharp voice snaps Sojourner out of her daydream. She looks up and sees a shriveled, old woman with a blue fox skin hanging around her neck glaring at her. “You the person Rosie told us not to eat?” She asks as she jabs her cigarette holder into Sojourner’s chest.

“Uh, yeah. Can I help y-”

“What the hell is so special ‘bout you?” The croon demands, “You’re too small to eat anyway, couldn’t feed even a family of three!”

The bear stares shocked at the rude woman, ‘The fuck is this bitch’s problem?’ “Uh, okay. That’s fine with me. I didn’t want to be eaten in the fi-”

“What’s ya name?” The elder interrupts, drawing attention from the rest of the customers.

“...Sojourner.” She answers flatly, she doesn’t like this woman, “What’s yours?”

“Susan.” The woman answers curtly as she takes a drag off her cigarette, “Why can’t we eat you?”

“A. Because I don’t want to be eaten. B. I’m doing repairs around here. And C. Because Rosie told y’all not to.” Sojourner lists, getting agitated with the woman. 

“Well, why aren’t cha workin’? Why are you in here, snoozin’ and bein’ a bum?” Susan blows cigarette smoke in the bear's face. “If Rosie hired you to work, then get to work.”

“Remind me, your name is Susan, correct?” Sojourner asks, her eyes narrowing.

“Yeah.” The old woman answers.

“So, unless your name is Rosie or you hire me personally, I don’t have to do shit you say, do I?” The patrons of the emporium gasp, watching the heckler’s reaction. The sailor’s eyes and arms light up hotly, “How’s about you go about your day and I’ll go about mine? Sounds good to you, Su-san? ” Venom drips off the woman’s name as Sojourner growls.

“Ah, I see you’ve met the town sweetheart.” A staticky voice asks as Alastor and Rosie walk in from the back entrance with their arms linked.

“Yeeeeep.” Sojourner answers dryly, not breaking eye contact with the glaring old woman who does the same.

“Now, now, Susan. Sojourner is here to make repairs around town since Tommy and Willard have been killed. Don’t give her grief, alright?” Rosie shoos the old woman away with a stern look. “That goes for everyone! Sojourner is a welcomed guest and friend! Treat her like one of our own.” The crowd mumbles in agreement. Rosie nods and turns to the handywoman. “The sign looks spectacular, sweetie. I love it!”

Sojourner grins and stands up, “Great. I’ll get hung right away.” She turns to Alastor, “It was wonderful to meet you, Alastor.”

“Same to you, my dear. I look forward to seeing you again.” Alastor replies warmly. The friends watch the little bear exit back into the garden, “What a charming girl, shame we can’t eat her.”

“Alastor!” Rosie laughs, giving him a love tap. “Behave, you rascal! Besides you wouldn’t want to eat someone who got a one up on your old rival, now would you?”

Red eyes widen with intrigue, “Oh? Do tell!” The two friends sit down in the parlor to gossip. By the end of the story, Alastor is holding his sides with tears slide down his face. “You’re joking. Tell me you’re not serious!” He howls.

Rosie cackles as she dabs her eyes with the hanky, “I was lunching with Carmilla and Zestial when it happened. I saw the video on their phone, it was hilarious. She sprayed him like a fire hose and then yelled at him!” She unfurls her fan and tries to cool herself. “Three times! First the face, then his body, ending on his shoes!” The duo fall out again with laughter. “That’s how I found out about her, y’know? She does marvelous work for Carmilla and she recommended her to me.”

Alastor looks to the front and sees Sojourner taking down the pulley system. He smiles as he watches the spitfire concentrate with the ropes, feeling a familiar pull towards her that he can’t quite describe. Even in her sinner form, he can’t help but feel like he knows her from somewhere. With a snap of his fingers, the Radio Demon turns on the store music, Bessie Smith plays in the background as he sips tea with his best friend.

It’s good to be back. 

________________

1934, Devil Dog’s Mechanic and Electrical Repairs- Apartment

Sojourner flops down on the couch, exhausted but satisfied with her productive day. She can’t believe all the clients she’s received ever since the lunch incident with that fuckin’ screensaver. The sailor thinks back to when she first arrived in Hell and Chester warned her to never interact with the overlords. 

‘Maybe he meant, never strike a deal with them for perks.’ Though, Sojourner can’t fathom why she would ever have the need to. If she couldn’t obtain whatever she needed without risking her soul, then it obviously wasn’t worth it. “Yeah, fuck that soul snatching shit, dude.” She mutters to herself and takes a sip of her tea. “That flat-faced prick really thought he was slick trying to pull a fast one on me.” Anger bubbles in her chest but she catches it. Whatever. It’s over now, and she got away safe. Additionally, Elliot said he was fine and that his boss was too angry to function for the next two days.

Sojourner grins to herself, “Hope ya like chicken salad, Voxy.” She snorts as turns on her phone radio. 

“Uh-oh the T.V.’s buffering!

I’LL D3ST0Y UUUUU!”

Her home goes dark as all the power in the city fails. 

“FUCK YOU, SCREENSAVER!” Sojourner cusses angrily.

Can’t have shit nice.

Notes:

Oh, shit. Sojo is met the big, bad Radio Demon! Thankfully her taste in classics saved her skin and won his favor! Hopefully that will come in handy.

I like to think that Rosie and Alastor's reunion was as warm as this. It can be overwhelming not seeing a friend in a very long time.

Chapter 50: Day by Day

Summary:

By the order of the High Council Michael is required to partake in extracurricular activities to lower his stress levels. Thankfully Abel could always use an extra hand on the Rainbow bridge

Notes:

Last update for the week! I love the idea of Abel, Emily, and Michael being a trio. Also, Colonel Knobbles is Abel's pet goat from when he was alive, he's always been this shitty.

Date: September 19, 2025

Age: Ancient

Location: Rainbow Bridge

Weather: Absolutely perfect

Current Conditions: Enjoying his secondary job and telling the worst goat in existence to fuck off.

 

“You shit goat! Leave it!” Michael fusses at Colonel Knobbles, who insists on helping him repair the fence by knocking it down. The archangel stands up and takes the unruly animal by the collar, leading him away. “Go that way, harass someone else for a while. I’m trying to fix what you broke, again! ” The goat bleats in protest as Michael leads him past the metal gates and latches it. “Behave or I’m putting you in the pen again, got it?”

“Pfffftt, BLEEEEGH!” Colonel Knobbles argues back, his tongue hanging out of his mouth.

“Yeah, whatever.” Michael scoffs, he rolls his eyes and walks back.

“Is he being a pill again?” A jolly voice laughs.

Michael turns and sees Abel smiling at him, “Of course he is, he’s the worst goat ever!” He exclaims as he bites back a smile.

“Aw, he just wants to hel- KNOBBLES! PUT HIM DOWN!” Abel runs over and hops the fence to chase down his goat. The goat runs away with a stressed out duck in his teeth, the water fowl’s wing beats him in the face. 

“Damn it!” Michael follows after and quickly runs past Abel, catching the awful animal by his horns and pulling him to a stop. “I didn’t seriously mean to bother someone else!” Michael reprimands, shaking Colonel’s head, “Spit him out!” The goat tries to pull away.

“Drop the duck!” Abel demands, raising his shepherd’s crook, “I mean it!” Knobbles finally obeys and releases the poor animal. The duck quacks loudly as it waddles away angrily. “Off to goat jail with you, come on!” Abel fusses and hooks his pet goat off to his pen. Michael goes to check on the poor mallard to make sure it was alright, but it bites him, so he assumes it’s fine.

Abel walks back to join Michael as he sits in the grass by his toolbox. The two sit in silence before the shepherd speaks, “He is the worst goat in existence.” They crack up with laughter.

Michael loves the days where he can get out of the office and help Abel out at the Rainbow Bridge. Ever since that extermination day three years ago, Raphael demanded that Michael have two days a week to do what he wanted. However, his training sessions with Azrael had only gotten worse in brutality, by order of Father. There is nothing anyone can do to help him on that issue.

 

His heart sinks a little, he still can’t remember much of what happened after they returned home that day, but he knows that Adam has been acting strangely towards him ever since. ‘I remember being angry at him. What was I angry about?’ The archangel has been trying to answer that question for years, it’s like there’s a wall blocking him from remembering clearly. His brothers insist they have no clue what he’s talking about and he’s gotten nowhere by pressing them. Michael sighs, ‘Hopefully, it wasn’t too bad.’ He doesn’t understand, Adam annoys him regularly, but never enough to entice true anger.

“Michael?” Abel asks, gently nudging him. “You doing okay?” He leans over to get a better look at his friend’s face.

The warrior shakes his head to clear his thoughts, “Mm-hmm.” He nods, “Just thinking.”

“Trying to remember again?”

Michael looks away with a slight frown, “Yeah.” He concedes and runs his alabaster fingers through his blond hair. “Still can’t though.”

Abel gives him a sympathetic frown, “I’m sorry.” And looks down at his hands, “I wish I could help somehow, Dad won’t tell me anything either. And Emily has asked Sera a dozen and one times.”

“I know and I appreciate the effort.” Michael smiles tiredly, “The two of you have helped me immensely, I hope you know that.” He gestures to the sunny pastures, “I don’t know what awful ‘relaxing’ activity Raphael would’ve made me do if you hadn’t suggested this place to Sera.”

“And you’re sure this is making you happy?” Abel asks, cautiously. “You want to do handiwork around here?” 

Michael nods, “Yes, Abel. For the hundredth time, yes. I like to be outside. I like to work with my hands. And I love being around the animals.” He chuckles softly, twiddling his hammer in his hands. “And I enjoy spending time with you.”

Abel blushes furiously at Michael’s last statement, “Me too!” He cheers and sits up. “I know I’m not the best at fixing things like you, but you have taught me a lot of cool things that I can do now when you’re not around.” The shepherd beams inwardly, he’s so happy that Michael enjoys their time together as much as he does. 

 

When his dad brought him to the seraphim meeting, which was rare, Abel was shocked to find out how bad of shape Michael was mentally. He honestly wasn't sure if it was even appropriate for him to be there given he didn’t know the warrior angel well at all. But when he heard of the alternatives they were planning for him and how upset Emily was, he blurted out “Does he like animals?” 

The shepherd remembers how hot his face got when the entire table turned to look at him. “I-i-if he does, then Mi-Michael can come hang out with me on the Rainbow bridge! Th-there a bunch-a animals and flowers and sunshine and… ahem heh, heh.” He trailed off into an embarrassed silence and refused to make eye contact with his dad, though he could feel his eyes on him even with his mask on. 

The relief Abel felt when Raphael gasped and exclaimed, “Oh my Dad, yes! Michael loves animals!” He tapped the table and then Azrael excitedly, getting his hands got slapped away hard in return, “The Rainbow Bridge is his favorite place and I’m sure Abel would appreciate the help now and then, right?” The healer looked at him expectantly as he slapped his brother back.

“Oh, uh, yeah! Yeah, yeah, Something always needs fixing there!” Abel nodded frantically, “There’s plenty of outdoorsy stuff to do.”

Emily jumped up and ran over to throw her arms around Abel, squishing her face to his, “Ooooh Abel, you’re a genius!” She squeaked with delight. The shepherd’s face turned tomato red as the joyous angel squeezed him. “Sera, Michael can play with Abel, right? Oh, can’t he?” Her bright blue eyes sparkled with cheer.

Sera chuckled and shook her head, there’s no way she could say no to that sweet face, “Of course, if that what he wants to do.” She permitted and laughed Emily flies over and hugs her sister. “Thank you, sis!” The sweet angel looked back the goatherd, “Thank you, Abel!”

Abel sighs deeply, ever grateful for that day. He never really had the opportunity to speak to Emily as she was always busy spreading joy to the winners. But ever since Michael started coming to help three years ago, he sees the beautiful girl almost every day. This truly is Heaven.

 

“Michael! Abel!” Speaking of the angel, here she comes. “Good morning!” Emily greets as she lands gracefully and trots over, holding a box in her hands, “I have treats!” She opens them and they look…like food. Lopsided, doughy, oatmeal-consistency like food. The men look curiously inside the box and then at each other.

“Overnight oats?” Michael asks with a tight smile.

Emily giggles, “No, silly! They’re muffins! I made them myself.” She boasts proudly. Michael and Abel fight to keep their faces surprised. 

“Oh, E-Em, you shouldn’t have!” Abel’s voice wavers as he keeps his smile. She really, really shouldn’t have, the girl can’t cook. 

“Nonsense, you two work so hard, you deserved a home cooked meal.” Emily declares determinedly, “Let’s see, we have blueberry, black cherry, cinnamon raisin, and chocolate chip. And they’re all made with love. And no flour, I forgot the flour.” She mutters, embarrassed. “But that just means they’re gluten free. Try one!”

The boys share another anxious glance, “After you, Abel.” Michael gestures to the box, “First pick is yours.”

“Oh, I couldn’t possibly choose before you!” Abel argues back, his eyes wide with betrayal, “You have such a busier schedule than me.”

”Abel, I wouldn’t be sitting here with my two dearest friends if it weren’t for your input.” Michael smiles sweetly, “Please, I insist. ” Translation: Pick before I wrestle you and win. 

The shepherd’s smile turns icy, “You’re too kind, Michael, much too kind.” He smiles through gritted teeth, plucking what he thinks is the blueberry one from the box. Half the muffin cup spills out. “Go on and pick yours so we can cheer to a delicious… muffin.”

‘You sneaky bastard.’ The archangel curses inwardly and grabs the… what in all of Paradise is this? He sees dark spots floating in the mixture, but he can’t tell what they are.

 

Tears well up in Emily’s eyes, she can’t believe how sweet her friends are, so considerate and gentlemanly. “I love you both so much!” She exclaims, her wings flutter with happiness, “You two are the sweetest!” She grabs a ‘muffin’ herself and slips out of her hand, splattering the men. “Oops, I’m so sorry.” She gasps. 

“It’s alright, Emily. We’re already covered in hay and grass stains.” Michael soothes. A bead of sweat runs down the side of his face, he does not want to eat this strange concoction.

The Seraphim of Joy grabs the last muffin and raises it to her friends, “Cheers! To my two best friends!”

“Cheers.” The men force with enthusiasm and take a sip of their muffins. The flavor is insanely sweet and the texture is wet and chewy. Abel suppresses a gag as a noticeable crunch is heard in his mouth.

“Mmm~” He groans with a tight smile, “Ch-chocolate chip. Yummy.” He compliments with a mouthful of raw batter.

“That’s blueberry.” Emily clarifies, about to take a ‘bite’.

Michael dry heaves and throws his hand over his mouth, cough, cough . A puff of white powder puffs out of his mouth as he chokes. “Em, I thought you forgot the flour.” He sputters.

“I did! What is that?” She asks surprised, pouring the mixture in her mouth. A high pitch yelp is muffled in her closed lips as her eyes squeeze shut in disgust. Her hands flail in panic, “Oh my gosh, ew!” Spitting the batter back into the muffin holder, she throws the failed food back in the box, “Ugh, no one eat this!”

Her friends quickly spit out their food and put the remainder of their ‘muffins’ back in the box. They all groan in disgust and wipe their mouth on their hands and sleeves before quieting down. Two pairs of golden eyes meet blue and they all burst into laughter, “I’m sorry, guys.” Emily apologizes, “I thought I did better this time.” She blushes furiously and fiddles with her ruffled collar. Abel and Michael laugh harder, Abel tips over on his side while Michael rests his head on his hands, his shoulders shake.

Colonel Knobbles walks over and sniffs the treat box, he recoils and shakes his head, “BLEEEEEEEHH!” He bleats as he runs away. 

Emily pouts, “No one asked you, you naughty goat!” She calls after him in huff. Tears stream down Michael’s and Abel’s faces as they holler with laughter.

Today is a good day.

Notes:

I think this is one of the cutest chapters I've written. It makes sense to me that Emily cannot cook to save her life or anyone else's, but her sweet heart is in the right places.

Chapter 51: Captain, My Captain

Summary:

Sojourner finds herself a cute little roomate while witnessing a throw down between a spider, a tomcat and some loan sharks

Notes:

Hey Y'all long week at work but i'm back with three more chapters for your enjoyment!

Date: October 7, 2025

Age: 7 Years and almost 2 months dead

Location: Entertainment district

Weather: Cool ‘n’ Crispy

Current Conditions: Getting off the phone with Sir Pentious

 

“And you sure you’re safe?” Sojourner clarifies as she exits the bar she just repaired the fire system on. “It freaked me out when you and that tall, pink guy almost landed on my van a few weeks ago.” She holds her phone between her ear and shoulder as she zips her liner against the chilly night air.

“Oh, yesss, my dear. I am perfectly fine! It was a trust exsssercise I was particssipating in.” The inventor explains, happily.

Sojourner’s eyes widen significantly, “The fuck you mean it was a trust exercise?” She asks incredously, “The hell kind of trust exercise requires you falling off a fuckin’ roof? In the doomsday district of all places!” 

“What kind of klutzsss do you take me for?” Sir Pentious sniffs, offended. “I didn’t fall off anything! I was thrown.” He explains curtly.

“DA FUCK YOU MEAN?” Sojourner shrieks, almost dropping her phone. “Who the hell threw you?”

“Vaggie.” Sir Pentious answers, matter of factly, “ But it’s quite alright, dear. In fact, it helped bring me closer to the others.”

“What others?” Sojourner questions, fishing her keys out of Hot Mic.

“The other resi-”

“FUCKIN’ ASSHOLE!” A nasally voice snarls, followed by thunk , “Shit!” Slam!

“Oh, shit. Ssssojourner, I’ll have to call you back.” Sir Pentious whispers.

“Yeah, go handle that. Hasta la bye bye.” The electrician bids adieu.

“Hasssta la bye bye.” The phone hangs up.

‘What was that about?’ Sojourner wonders as she approaches her van.

Meow. She pauses and looks around, what was that?

Maow~ There it is again, is that a cat? It sounds muffled.

Meow! MEOW~! It is a kitty and it’s in distress.

“Where are you?” Sojourner calls gently, “Kitty, kitty?” A can falls to the ground in a short alley followed by some scuffling. Grabbing her mag-lite, the sailor ventures onward looking high and low for the animal. The bright light shines on a dirty white paw scrambling under a dumpster, pulling on her leather gloves and her work bonnet, Sojourner kneels on the ground and looks underneath.

A tuxedo kitten with three glowing green eyes hisses and tries to run, its left front paw is tightly wrapped in thin wire that’s stuck under the wheel. It couldn’t be more than a few months old, three at most. “Shhhh, it's okay.” She coos, looking for the safest way to free the kitten without further injury. “I’m gonna help you.”

An hour and a lot of cussing later, Sojourner walks out of the alley with a successfully scuffed feral kitten. “What part of I’m trying to help your black ass was confusing?” She glares at the shocked kitten as he stares at her, “Nah, don’t get quiet now. You were talkin’ mad shit before I scruffed yo’ ass! Now what?” The kitten licks its lips and says nothing. “Where’s yo’ mama?” Sojourner demands as she looks around, “Well?” The kitten lets out a low growl as he’s laid on the hood of the van. “Gotta get this damn wire off.” The bear mutters as she pulls out some diagonal cutters, “You have to chill out, my guy. I don’t want to get you by accident.”

It takes another 10 minutes, but Sojourner successfully gets the wire off the kitten, his paw is limp and the injury looks scabbed over. ‘Fuck. How long was this thing on him?’ She sighs, looking at the wound, “I’m worried your leg isn’t salvageable, baby.” She scratches the kitten’s head and he hisses then purrs. “Pick a struggle, my guy.” Carefully she picks him up and cradles him against her chest, “You’re lucky I love cats.”

“There they are! And they’re fuckin’ singin’?” A mobster’s voice cracks before gunfire rings out.

“Holy shit!” Sojourner ducks and dives into the alley again as bullets whiz by. ‘What the fuck?’ She covers the kitten and takes cover behind the dumpster as explosions and rapid fire blasts all around. ‘Don’t hit my van, don’t hit my van!’ Sojourner prays as the violence dies down. Peeking her red eye open, she pulls a small extendable mirror out of Hot Mic and pokes it out towards the street, there’s no one there. “Oh, thank god.” Sojourner sighs, “You okay, buddy?” She asks the kitten as she walks back to her van, giving it a once over. She’s doing her best to ignore the carnage of all the dead sharks while the poor kitten trembles and digs his nails further into her coveralls. “Yeah, you get used to it, don’t worry.” She sighs, hearing voices down the street.

“Like I said, you don’t know me. Sex ain’t the only thing I’m good at.” 

That voice sounds familiar. Sojourner turns towards the sound, a pair of sinners stand at the end of the street covered in blood. Holy shit, isn’t that the tall guy that almost fell on her van with Pentious?

“Good to know. Because this guy ain’t half bad.” A gray and white tuxedo cat sinner replies to the tall one with a smile. The tall sinner smiles back, they both look rough as hell, but happy. 

“Aw, that’s sweet.” Sojourner smiles as she climbs in her van and drives away with her new friend. “What should I call you, hmm?” She asks the kitten as he sits on the dashboard, looking through the windshield with wonder. The bear looks at the back of the cat and notices a crook in his tail and she frowns, this kitten has been through it rough. “Hook? You like the name Hook?” He turns to look at her annoyed. Pfft “Captain Hook?” She snorts at the kitten’s response, “Oooh, Captain Tailhook! It makes sense, your legs look like landing gear and you even have a hook in the back to catch the wire!” The sailor laughs, his ears lay back. “Too soon, my bad.” She apologizes and looks away, grinning. The kitten looks back to the windshield and settles down as comfortably as he can. 

“Oh captain, my captain.” Sojourner smiles as she drives them home.

______________

 

1326, 10 November, 2025, Coins in the Water Laundromat

“Okay, it’s all fixed.” Sojourner sighs, opening and closing the drawers with ease. “Shouldn’t catch on anything else.” 

“I can’t thank ya enough, toots. Ya really came in clutch.” The stout woman in a flapper dress comments as she fiddles nervously with her gloves. “I can’t tell ya what my boss would do if this wasn’t fixed before he and his girlfriend came back.”

“Uuuh, yeah. So if you can just sign here.” Sojourner points to her phone, “I’ll send your invoice and-”

“Who da fuck are you?” A sharp voice demands.

Sojourner whirls around and sees sharks and the barrels of shotguns, Tommy guns, and all sorts of guns pointed at her.

“WOAH, WOAH WHAT THE SHIT?!” She shrieks, throwing her hands up. “Hey, hey, relax!! We were just finishing up!”

“Finishin’ up, what?” A hammerhead snaps.

“Fixing the desk!” Sojourner points, “It was broken, now it’s fixed! See?” She moves the drawer back and forth flawlessly. “Your secretary broke it by accident and asked me to fix it.”

“We ain’t got no damn secretary!” A short tiger shark exclaims, “And that drawer weren’t broken neither!”

“Wait, what do you mean? She’s right- Mimzy?” Sojourner looks behind her to discover she’s alone. “Mimzy?” She spins around rapidly, dread fills her body. 

“She’s in kahoots with that bitch, Mimzy, babe!” A lady leopard shark points with her sharp nails, “Kill her!” A car slams into the building and runs the woman over and hits several other sharks, barely missing Sojourner.

“So long, suckas!” Mimzy cheers as she peels away, cackling.

“JEANIE!” The Great White shark cries out, cradling his girlfriend, “Oh baby, speak to me!” The mangled woman coughs out blood as her eyes roll to the back of her head. Tears fall on her heavily make up face, “BRING MIMZY’S HEAD TO ME!” He snarls, drool drips from his sharp teeth.

Sojourner runs to the downed couple, “She has a spine injury, lay her down slowly!” She orders as she pulls out her phone. Shocked, the mob boss obeys. “What’s your name?” The bear demands.

“P-Paulie.” He stammers, watching Sojourner dial the phone and put it on speaker.

It rings a few times before a familiar voice answers, “Sojo? You alright?” 

“Penny, I’ve got a medical emergency. Car collision, four hard down with two unconfirmed fatalities. One female hellborn, shark type, suspected spinal injury with internal rupture. Advise.” Sojourner reports.

“Copy on casualties. Location?” Footsteps are heard sprinting over the phone. Another voice relays the information over a walked-talkie.

“Location is Coins in the Water Laundromat. Entertainment - Industrial pentacle inner base.” The sailor answers.

“Copy, breathing check on spinal injury.”

“Sporadic, suspected blood filling in lungs due to coughing up blood. Perform chest compressions?”

“Negative. Possible puncture in the lungs and will agitate. Perform rescue breaths.”

“Performing rescue breaths, aye. Handing the phone over to Paulie.” Sojourner shoves her phone into the tiger shark's hands, “Keep her updated and check the others!” She orders before plugging the woman’s nose and giving her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

Paulie tries his best to remain calm as he answers Penny’s question to the best of his abilities. Within a few short minutes, sirens can be heard in the distance. The Army doctor leads the EMT’s in securing the victims and taking over CPR from Sojourner. As quickly as they came, they left, taking the victims to the nearest hospital.

Paulie stands in shock before he hears a wheeze. He looks down at the small bear on her knees trying to catch her breath, his girlfriend’s blood smeared on her mouth and clothes. He doesn’t understand, why would she do that? She’s a sinner, not to mention, he was about to kill her. It doesn’t make sense.

“Hey.” The loan shark says, getting Sojourner’s attention. She looks up at him, winded. “Why’d you do that?” He asks, confused.

“What do you mean? That’s how you do CPR.” Sojourner asks, equally confused.

“No, no. I mean… why’d you save them?”

“Because their lives were in danger!” The bear explains, “They got run over by a car, remember? You were there.” What kind of questions are these? Is Paulie in shock as well?

The loan shark stares at the small bear in awe, “We were about to kill ya. Why didn’t you run away? Why’d you help us?”

Realization finally hits Sojourner, he’s asking why she bothered, “Because I didn’t want them to die.” She answers simply, “If I can help then I’m gonna help, man.” Sojourner spits out Jeanie’s blood and wipes her face off as best she can. “I’m sorry about Mimzy, I didn’t know she didn’t work here. She had a key to the place so I assumed…” 

Paulie checks his pockets and sighs, that woman is dead on sight the next time he sees her. “I… I believe ya.”

Sojourner looks up surprised, “Really?” She asks. “Thank you.”

The great white shark blows out a deep breath, “Yeah, no one who’s knee-jerk reaction is to save someone about to kill her can be that much of a liar.” He extends his hand down to the bear, “What’s ya name?”

She takes his hand and stands up, “Sojourner Knight.” Introducing herself as she shakes his hand. “It’s nice to meet you. Need a ride to the hospital?”

Paulie gives her a toothy grin, “I’d appreciate that a lot, thank you.” The two walk out of the damaged storefront and approach the Devil Dog’s van. The loan shark spares a glance at the mild-tempered woman. ‘How the hell is she a sinner?’ He wonders to himself.

As they approach her van, the rear bumper has been ripped off and there’s a gigantic dent on the passenger side back wheel. Sojourner’s mouth drops open in a gasp, “When I see that bitch again,” She says quietly, “I am going to cut her hamstrings and break her GODDAMN FINGERS! AND SHE WILL BE AWAKE FOR ALL OF IT!” A pulse emits from the small bear and knocks over a postal box and sets off several car alarms. “AND ON MY BIRTHDAY OF ALL DAYS?! FUCK YOU, MIMZY!” Sojourner snarls. 

The aquatic mob boss stands back, intimidated by the display of power. “Happy birthday.” He mutters, jumping when she snaps her head over her shoulder to look at him.

“Thank you, Paulie. That’s very sweet of you.” Sojourner thanks through gritted teeth. Her eyes glow brightly as sparks dance off the wires in her hair. “Swear to god, I’ll make her swallow her own fuckin’ teeth.” She seethes and stomps over to the driver side door.

Ah, so that’s why she’s here. Nevermind.

Notes:

If Sojo ever sees Mimzy again, it's on sight. Period. Captain Tailhook is inspired by my own tuxedo boy! He has all his limbs though but it's fine!

Chapter 52: Bombshell

Summary:

Sojourner and the loansharks have become unlikely friends. She has just repaired their headquarters when it's ruin by a certain Aussie

Notes:

Second of the update! I had so much writing this one!

Date: December 28, 2025

Age: Almost 7 and 4 months years dead

Location: Coins in the Water Laundromat

Weather: Very cold, it might snow later

Current Conditions: Finishing up repairs on the storefront Mimzy ruined

 

“Ta-da!” Sojourner says with a flare gesture to the desk drawer. “It’s fixed….again.”

“I gotta say, doll, you really came through.” Jeanie grins as she wheels herself over. Thankfully, all the sharks Mimzy ran over pulled through. However, Jeanie, who got the worst of it, definitely has a tough road back to recovery. “It looks brand spankin’ new!”

“Aw, thanks hon.” The electrician grins and blows her a kiss. “I’m just glad you’re doing alright.”

“You can say that again.” Paulie agrees as he plants a kiss on his fiancée's head. “What’s the damage, toots?” He asks Sojourner as he pulls out his checkbook.

“With materials, labors, and repairs. It will be about $11,000.” The bear types on her tablet.

“What? At first it was $15,000!” Jeanie exclaims, flabbergasted.

“Wedding present.” Sojourner winks at the happy couple, “Congratulations again, you two.”

Paulie pulls her into a tight hug and plants a toothy kiss on her cheek. “You’re too good to us, doll.” He laughs, “We can’t thank ya enough!”

“You gotta come to the wedding!” Jeanie sniffs, using a a-tip as to not ruin her make-up. “If ya need a date, I got a cousin who’s lookin’.” She wiggles her eyebrows.

“Whadaya talkin’ ‘bout, honey?” Paulie’s heavy arm slings around Sojourner’s shoulder, “A pretty dame like her, she’s got fellas kissing the ground she walks on.”

Pffft! “No.” Sojourner scoffs, rolling her eyes and laughing.

“Da fuck ya mean ‘no’?” Vinny, the whale shark, asks. “Course ya do!”

“Mm-mmm, incorrect, mon frair.” The bear denies, shaking her head. “I haven’t had a boyfriend since I was alive and 19 years old. And that puppy love only lasted a year and a half.” 

The filled room stands in silence before the loan sharks start clamoring. 

“If ya need a boyfriend, date me!”

“The fuck would she wanna date you for? Ya garbage!”

“You think she wants a toothy, cross-eyed bum like you?”

Sojourner stands stunned at the sudden fighting, “Uh, fellas? Guys?” She tries to interject. The fighting gets louder until Frankie, the bull shark, pulls out his Tommy gun and the rest follow suit.

“AYO, CHILL!” She snaps, repelling all the weapons to the ceiling. The room falls quiet again. “A few things, 1. I’m not looking to date, I’m normally not into anyone like that, 2. Don’t pull guns on each other, you’re buddies, act like it!  And 3. If you damage anything this building that I just fixed, I’m punching all y’all’s fuckin’ teeth in, capiche?” Sojourner glares at all the sharks in the room, save for Paulie and Jeanie.

”Capoche.” The sharks answer in unison, all looking ashamed of themselves.

“Good, catch.” She orders and drops the weapons from the ceiling. Phew! She sighs and pulls out her bun to redo it. The great white mob boss stands there with a finger on his chin, highly impressed by Sojourner’s command.

“Hey, doll?” He says.

“Yes, Paulie?” She answers, politely.

“Ya ever thought of becoming an Overlord?” He asks, curiously.

Sojourner stares at her friend for a moment before cracking up with laughter. “Paulie, honey, when would I have time to be an overlord?” She giggles, “Who would want to sign their soul over to me?”

“I’m just saying, you got abilities that can level a room. You’re basically Magneto.” The loan shark boss argues, smiling amusingly. “Ya know, I can find some guys that can help ya hold down a territory, if you want.” He offers, the room mumbles in agreement. 

“That’s awfully sweet of you, Paulie, really it is, but I know I’m not cut out to be an overlord. That’s way too much work and I have plenty of work already.” Sojourner smiles warmly while shaking her head. “What would I be the overlord of anyway? Construction and repairs, get outta here!” She snorts. 

Paulie chuckles and crosses his arms, “Well, the offer’s there, if ya ever interested, doll.”

“I appreciate it, Paul. But I’m more than content just fixing things and meeting new pe-”

BOOM! An explosion takes out the outer wall, blasting a nine foot hole in it. Red, glittery smoke swirls around the damaged entrance.

“IS THAT THE BEST YOU’VE GOT, YA CUNTS?” A woman with a thick Australian accent shouts as another explosion rings out. “BRING Ya fuckin’ A-gam…” Her voice trails out as the fight moves on. 

Sojourner and the sharks cough as the dust and debris settle, they all stare shocked at the damaged wall. “ARE YOU SHITTIN’ ME? I JUST FIXED THIS FUCKIN’ PLACE!” The bear snarls and runs through the hole, “HEY! BRING YOUR OUTBACK STEAK ASS BACK HERE!” She chases the fight into the street, a red ball flies at her head. Reflexively, she catches it, and hears it hissing. “Oh, shit!” Sojourner lobs the bomb down the street, accidentally blowing up a tank. “Oh my god, I’M SORRY!” She shouts immediately.

“Nice throw, bitch!” A cyclops sinner with a red one-shoulder top and torn black leggings laughs, clapping the small bear on the back. “Here, try to take out their sniper!” She tosses Sojourner another lit bomb and takes off down the street.

“What the fuck? I don’t want this!” The sailor yells before registering what the bomber said, “Wait, WHAT SNIPER?!” 

“DOLL FACE, THROW IT!” Paulie shouts, hustling his men out of the bank, all armed to the teeth.

Sojourner throws the bomb down the street and it pulls to the far left, blowing up the 3rd floor of a building. A masked man with a rifle falls out of the window and lands on a car, groaning. “Holy shit, I’m so sorry!” The sailor apologizes again. 

“Ha, ha, nice! Thanks for the assist!” The bomber laughs, walking up to her. “What’s ya name?” She asks, smiling.

“You blew up my fuckin’ wall!” Sojourner snaps angrily.

“That’s a real weird fuckin’ name.” The one-eyed woman snorts, “Name’s Cherri Bomb.”

Red and green eyes grow to the size of dinner plates, “Y-you… you’re Che- Paulie, NO!” Sojourner jumps between Cherri and the loan sharks all pointing their guns at the bomber. “No, no, no, no! Don’t hurt her!”

“Why the fuck not? You were about to.” Frankie asks. “This broad blew up our beautiful wall ya worked so hard on!”

“I know, but that was before I knew who she was!” The bear argues back. “Please, let’s just put the guns and bombs away? Please?” She looks pleadingly between the two parties. 

Paulie nods and orders his crew to lower the guns, Cherri grins smugly and tosses a dud up and down in her hand. She looks at the small ursine sinner, who was this chick? She looks kinda familiar, but she can’t quite place her finger on it. 

“So, do I know you?” Cherri asks, blowing a bubble with her gum and popping it. “I feel like I’ve seen you ‘round.”

“You probably have, Sir Pentious is my friend.” Sojourner answers.

“Snake Bite? You’re buddies with that nerd, yet you’re trying to save my skin?” The Aussie laughs, “Ain’t that the richest?” She looks at the loan sharks, “So, who are these blokes, the Jets?”

“They’re PFFFFFFT! ” Sojourner starts cracking up, “Okay, that was a good one.” She turns to the confused pack of mobsters, “West Side Story.” She explains.

“I love that movie.” Vinny mutters, “Great music.”

“These gentlemen are good friends of mine and you just ruined their store. I literally just finished fixin’ it today!” Sojourner explains, her tone turning much more serious. “I don’t want any trouble to start between you two, so what are you gonna do to fix this?” Sojourner crosses her arms. 

Cherri looks down at the bear and pops her gum again. She decides she likes her and it would be annoying to keep fighting off a bunch-a loan sharks, those jackasses run in tight circles. A groan is heard behind her and she turns around, the sniper Sojourner took out is still lying on the car. Grinning, Cherri waltzes over and searches the injured gunman. “Ah, bingo!” She cheers, holding two sets of keys in her hand. Walking back over, she clicks the key fob, a blood red, supercharger sports car beeps across the street. Pointing to the vehicle, “That car is worth $42,000, probably more if ya strip it. Will that unwad your panties?” She asks, dangling the keys.

Paulie grumbles for a moment then nods at the second key, “What’s that one for?” He asks.

“This,” Cherri holds the smaller one up. “Belongs to me. These dickheads tried to be cheeky and nicked it. So, I chased them down and fucked ‘em up. Hence, your shop getting fucked.” The cyclops explains, “Fair trade?” She looks at Paulie expectantly.

The great white looks down at Sojourner who looks back with hope on her face. He sighs, “Deal, hand me the keys.” Cherri tosses car keys to him and the sharks head over to the car. 

Watching Sojourner breathe a sigh of relief, Cherri puts her hands on her hips. “What’s your deal, huh?” Her hip cocks to the side.

”Hm?” The sailor responds.

“I’m Snake Brain’s rival, we fight on the regular. Why did you do that? Especially if you're his friend.”

Sojourner is stuck for an answer, it’s not her place to tell Cherri that Sir Pentious has a huge crush on her. She’s never supported friends telling their friend’s feelings to their crush, it seems violating. That should only be allowed with explicit permission, but unfortunately, almost no one shares her sentiment. “Uh, ask Pentious, that’s totally a question for him.” She finally answers. 

Cherri studies her then shrugs, “Yeah, I’ll just bring it up in casual conversation.” She laughs, giving Sojourner a sharp toothed grin. “What’s ya name, shorty?”

“I’m Sojourner.” She answers.

“Huh, that’s a mouthful. I’m gonna call you Joey!” Cherri declares, triumphantly.

“Oh, well that’s a new one.” The electrician comments, “I have a buncha nicknames, but not that one.”

“It’s mine for you!” The bomber’s phone rings, alerting her of a text message. Looking at her screen, she rolls her eyes, “Ugh, this depressing shit again? Angie, what the fuck?” She types a message back and pivots on her heel, “I’ll see you ‘round Joey!” And she jogs off down the street.

“Hasta la bye bye, Cherri.” Sojourner waves back. An alarm goes off on her phone, “Oh, shit! I gotta get to my next client.” Sojourner grabs her keys and jogs to her car, “Paulie! I’ll give you a call later about repairs!”

“Alright, doll! Take care!” Paulie calls from the driver’s side window, “One of ya’s go get Jeanie! The fuck ya doin’?”

Notes:

Charlie bomb is hilarious to write for. But I do find myself speaking her lines the Australian accent I can't muster to make sure it sounds like her!

Chapter 53: Do What was Required

Summary:

It's a week after Charlie's and Vaggie's visit to Heaven and Emily is struggling with the terrible truth of the exterminations.

Notes:

Last update for the week! I can't believe my transcript is already past 90 chapters! I hope you guys are ready cause I'm nowhere near done!

Date: January 04, 2026

Age: Young for a seraphim

Location: High Angelic Courthouse H.A.C.

Weather: Beautiful sunny skies, not that it mattered

Current Conditions: Feeling like a liar while feeling betrayed

 

Emily steps off the elevator into her sister’s empty office. It’s been a whole week and she still can’t believe it. Lucifer’s daughter, Charlie, is nothing like she imagined the Princess of Hell to be. It was like she and Emily had known each other forever and Charlie was coming back from a lengthy trip. The young seraphim walks to the window to look at the winner’s below. The ice cream, the mall, the trip to the zoo, Charlie has that same love for life that Emily does, especially the lives of her people. 

Charlie’s people, those poor sinners, how could Sera allow such an atrocity to happen? Tears sting Emily’s deep blue eyes, poor Charlie, she must be so afraid. But what can Emily do? If she doesn’t handle this smartly then she could wind up in Hell as a fallen angel before she can do anything worthwhile.  Sniff ‘This isn’t right!’ She cries, fighting to hold back sobs, “It’s not right.”

“What’s not right?” Abel asks, startling Emily by accident. “Oops, sorry!” He apologizes while putting his hands up. “I didn’t mean to scare ya.”

Emily sniffs again and looks curiously at her friend. “Abel,” She asks, turning to face him. “Do you know what your dad really does?” She asks quietly.

Abel’s heart drops into his stomach, he can feel his face go pale, ahem, AHEM! “I-I’m, ahem , I’m sorry?” Immediately sweat begins to bead on his brow.

Deep blue eyes narrow and light feet walk up closer, “Do you know. What. Your. Dad. Does?” She asks again slowly, “Tell me the truth.”

The shepherd’s pulse quickens as a drop of sweat runs down the side of his face. “Y-yeah, he’s a guitar player in his rock band.” He answers weakly.

“DO NOT TREAT ME LIKE I AM FOOLISH!” Emily shouts, her celestial form starting to peek through.

“Emily!” Sera snaps, stepping off the elevator with Adam. “That’s enough.”

“I’m not speaking to you! I’m speaking to my friend .” Tears stream steadily down Emily’s face as she glares at her sister, “ Answer me. ” She seethes turning back to Abel.

The first winner opens his mouth to speak, but words fail him. He looks away, ashamed. 

“He’s my kid, of course he does.” Adam answers for his son, walking up to Emily. “He found out after I told him about Michael.”

“Adam!” Sera snarls. What is he doing? Hasn’t Emily been through enough? “That’s enough!”

“Stop treating her like she’s fragile.” Adam grumbles, “Like Danger Ti- Lute said, cat’s already outta the bag. Yeah, your buddies knew about the exterminations and were under the strictest order not to tell anyone.” He takes off his mask to look Emily in the eye, “Relax, kid, only a select few higher ups beside my girls even knew what was going on until I blew it.”

Emily is in shock, her sister, her best friends, they all kept this from her? Is anything real anymore? “What… What happened to Michael?” She whispers.

Adam blows out a long breath and looks at Sera, he clears his throat when she refuses to make eye contact with him. “Sera.” The musician finally says, “Tell ‘er the truth.”

Sera’s gaze moves from Adam to Emily, seeing such anger on her sweet sister’s face breaks her heart. “Michael…” Sera hesitates, it doesn’t feel right without him here to defend himself, but she can’t risk triggering him again, especially near Emily. “He… was ordered to participate in the exterminations.” Sera pauses to choose her words. “However, they took a negative toll on him and it triggered him into thinking he was battling her . He can’t distinguish who’s friend or foe when he’s in that state, only who is righteous and who isn’t.” 

The High Seraphim looks down to her hands, guilt eats away at her. “Three years ago, he was about to attack Adam and Lute when Gabriel and Raphael put him under. In order to pacify his inner warrior, Raphael suppressed Michael’s memories of the last extermination he was in.” She looks at Adam and frowns when his eyes go distant, he’s remembering how close he was to death. “This was done to protect him and all Heaven from himself.”

Emily breaks down in tears, she can’t believe it. How can any of this be right? How can anyone hear call themselves angels? This is wrong, the secrets, the violence, the lying. How are they any better from sinners?

Abel goes to reach for her but she jerks her body away. Adam gently pulls his son back. “Give her a sec, kid.” Abel nods solemnly. This is terrible, surely Emily hates him now. He’s always wanted to tell her the truth, especially since the two have spent more time together and gotten so close. 

Tears sting Sera’s eyes, “Emily, I’m so sorry. Please, believe me.” She pleads kneeling in front of her little sister. 

“Why? What have you done that would make me trust you? Any of you?” Emily cries, looking at each angel in the room. “How are we better than anyone else? We are supposed to set the example and yet we allow and do such horrible things!” She wipes her eyes fiercely. “How can we call ourselves holy?” The question hits heavy in the room causing Adam and Sera to look away from her. “The fact that you can’t look me in the eye proves that you know that the exterminations are wrong! Why can’t we work with Charlie to redeem these souls? Why?”

“To keep Heaven safe!” Sera exclaims, “We can’t risk allowing wayward souls with the potential to harm those who have truly earned Paradise!” Why can’t Emily understand that? 

“If they have earned the right to be redeemed, then there is no danger!” The younger sister shouts back. “If they commit wrongdoings, which is possible because human are made to be imperfect, then we send them back to Hell to start the process again!” Why can’t Sera see that it can be that simple? “As seraphims it is our responsibility to watch over the souls in Heaven and that involves staying vigilant of any discrepancies!” She stomps to the elevator door. “If we can’t handle even that much without prejudice then maybe we shouldn’t be angels!” The doors open and she steps in. “I want to be alone for now, goodbye!”

As the elevator makes it way down, Emily looks over their kingdom, all those beautiful souls happily living their promised afterlife. It isn’t fair, everyone should get a chance to earn this, even if they made mistakes while they were alive. How could anyone want to hurt any soul? Especially an angel? “How could they? We’re supposed to be righteous.” White hair presses up against the glass as tears threaten to fall again. Ding! The elevator door opens. ‘Righteous.’ Sera said Michael was prone to attack anyone who isn’t righteous. “But he was about to attack Adam.” Emily mumbles to herself.

“Who was about to attack Adam?” Emily whips around and sees Michael looking concerned. “Emily, who?” The archangel asks again, stepping into the elevator and walking up to his friend.

The seraphim is stuck for an answer, her mouth opens then closes again. What does she do? She might trigger him if she tells him about how he is the one who almost killed Adam, but she doesn’t want to lie either. “I-I…” She stammers looking down at his wide gold eyes. Hic “I’m so sorry, Michael!” She sobs, “I can’t tell you!” Emily dashes out of the elevator and flies off. 

“Emily?” Michael calls after her, placing the case files he was carrying down on the floor and flies after her. “Emily!”

Ding! The elevator doors close.

Notes:

Poor Emily, Abel, and Michael. The three are tangled in a web of Holy drama!

Chapter 54: Ready for This?

Summary:

Elijah and Charles return from the doctor's from less than stellar news, the two men reminisce on Sojourner. Sojourner, however, is repairing the roofs of Cannibal Town when she's treated to a musical spectacular.

Notes:

Yo, what up yall? You know what time it is, three part update! I had a lot of fun writing this chapter and I hope y'all have fun reading it!

Date: January 16, 2026

Age: 39 years old

Location: Greensboro, NC

Weather: Strangely warm for January like 65*F

Current Conditions: Coming home from a doctor’s appointment

 

Elijah and Charles sit in traffic quietly, Antonio coos happily from the backseat as he kicks his feet in amusement. The older man looks in the rear view mirror and smiles, his grandson looks just like Elijah when he was a baby. The light turns green and the car pulls forward, they’re almost back at home. 

“We’ll set the guest room up after we take the crib out.” Elijah finally says, breaking the silence. “Nayeli and the baby can share a room, they’re still very young.” His thumb taps against the steering wheel as he concentrates on the road. 

“You don’t have to do that, Eli.” Charles sighs, “I have people who can check up on me, it‘s fine. I’m not going to do that to you and Aura.”

“Dad, Aura and I have already talked about it.” Elijah argues back, shaking his head. “We all talked about it and we decided it’s best that you live with me and Aura. Dezzi just had the surgery and she’s still recovering, Matthias has two roommates, Cha-Cha and Lani are still in school, and Queen is downsizing.” The oldest son lists off. “It’s okay, it’s safer if you live with us. It’s done.” His voice leaves no room for argument.

Charles inwardly winces, this appointment did not give them the news they were hoping for. “Thank you, son. I’m sorry.” The retired agent looks down to his hand. He attempts to squeeze his left hand and his fingers curl slowly before stopping halfway. 

“Unless you tried to give yourself a stroke on purpose, there’s nothing to apologize for.” Elijah counters quietly, he glances over to his dad. His heart squeezes watching him try to form a fist, how can this be the same man that tormented him and his siblings when they were younger? 

The man looks smaller, weaker, not like the mountain of a man that ruled the household with a cold, iron fist. Elijah doesn’t know how to feel about the state of his father. If someone told him five years ago that this is what Charles would be reduced to, he would’ve felt some sense of satisfaction. Is this the divine consequence of Charles’ actions? Karma? ‘Maybe Sojo is punishing him.’ Elijah thinks to himself, that’s what he would do if he could.

No, that’s wrong, Sojourner would never do something like this. She tried so hard to keep her anger at bay with their father until he pushed her too far. He can remember it now: Queen was on the floor bleeding all while helping Elijah wrestle the blade away from their little sister. The strength she had in her grip was unmatched, the violence in her eyes, the hate in her words. 

The oldest son shakes his head of the memory, ‘No, that was a one-time thing and it wasn’t even her fault.’ He knows whose fault it was, but he supposes it doesn’t matter now. She’s gone, she doesn’t have to worry about Charles anymore. ‘I wonder what she’s doing right now.’ Elijah wonders to himself, ‘Probably hanging out with mom and Aunt Jay. Or falling off something.’ He laughs to himself.

“What’s funny?” Charles asks, turning his head towards his son.

“Just thinking about Sojo.” Elijah answers as he turns into his neighborhood, “Wondering if she tripped or fell off something today.”

Charles chuckles through his nose, “She was such a clumsy girl. Always bumping into walls and stuff. Trippin’ off the sidewalks.” He laughs as he reminisces.

“Getting stuck on doorknobs, tumbling down the stairs.” Elijah adds as he pulls into the driveway and shuts the car off.

“Droppin’ things, can’t catch.” Charles carefully gets out of the car.

“Can’t throw anything straight either.” Antonio claps as his dad plucks him from his car seat.

“Always pulled to the left.” Both men say together and crack up as they walk into the house. 

“Man, I miss her.” Elijah sighs as he puts his son down on his playtime mat and tosses his keys into the bowl on the side table. “I wonder what she’s up to?”

“Being the sweet girl we all know and love.” Charles answers, kneeling down to kiss his grandson on the forehead. “Y’know, just being Sojo.”

______________

1217, January 16, 2025, Cannibal Town

 

“Suck on your old-ass titty and then barf on it, Susan!” The bear snarls from the rooftop. “Do ya want me to fix your shit or not?”

“Suck ya own hairy titty, ya furball! What kind of lady are ya? Disgraceful! Ya covered in dust, ya wear a man’s uniform, ya lug around lumber and rocks all day. Whataya tryin’ to prove?” The scornful old cannibal croons. “Have ya eva even worn a dress in ya life? Do ya even know what a dress is? Just awful!” The sinner continues to berate Sojourner as passerby’s look on in distaste.

“Keep on, Susan! I swear to whoever the fuck will listen, I’ll tomahawk this goddamn mallet at you!” The small bear has lost all her patience. She already hates having her work criticized, but to have it be done by this old bitch of all people, Sojourner can’t. “Know what? Fuckin’ fix your own house if I’m such shit at it! I’m going to another roof, fuck you, Susan!” Agitated and insulted, Sojourner stomps over to a neighboring building.

“Oooh, so now she’s a quitta? What, can’t take a few helpful notes from someone else, teddy bear?” Susan points her cane up at Sojourner, “This is the problem with you young sinners these days! Ya all so damn sensitive! Ya need to grow a thicker hide like me!”

“Why would anyone wanna be a mummified piece of ashy jerky like you?” Sojourner snaps with her hands on her hips. “Unless they’re into humping a half-empty burlap sack of dust!” The old cannibal gasps, offended.

“Why would anyone wanna be a tactless, raggedy child’s play-thing like you?” Susan counters back, “Based on how ya are, it’s obvious why ya got no ring on ya finga!” She takes a drag off her cigarette, “Hell, take a look at me, I’ve been down the aisle four times!”

“Was that before or after Rome fell?” Sojourner asks while crossing her arms. She smirks as she watches Susan’s face flush red with anger.

“Why you disrespect-” Susan growls.

“CANNIBALS AND CANNIBESSES ASSEMBLE IN THE SQUARE!” Rosie’s New York accent rings out from the center of town.

“Your owner’s callin’ you, Su-san!” Sojourner sneers at her, “Run along like a good ol’ dog, now.”

“Fuck you!” Susan phooyes before walking to the large assembly of cannibals.

“Fuckin’ finally! ” Sojourner groans before heading back over to where she was working. “If I knew I wasn’t gonna hit anybody else, I would’ve thrown my mallet ages ago.” She grumbles and starts back on fixing Susan’s roof. The craftswoman hums to herself as she half listens to what Rosie is announcing, something about a special visitor? 

“Please put ya bloody hands together for Princess Charlie!” Did Rosie just say princess?

“Dude, we have a princess?” Sojourner looks up from her work and watches the gazebo. “When did we get a princess?” She asks to herself, “Did we have one this whole time?”

“BOO! BRING ROSIE BACK!” That awful, grating voice returns to offend Sojourner’s eardrums.

“Susan?” An annoyed voice asks over the sound system.

“Susan.” Rosie and Alastor confirm as a shrill feedback causes Sojourner to wince.

“S-sorry.” The nervous voice apologizes, “Okay, uh, my name’s Charlie and I run-”

“BOO!” Susan immediately interrupts as she berates the poor woman before she can even say a word. 

“Holy shit, shut the fuck up, Susan!” Sojourner yells, her voice falls on deaf ears.

The old grouch continues to yell until the sovereign ruler finally loses her temper. “FUCK YOU, YOU OLD BITCH!” The crowd gasps, appalled at her crude words.

“Really? That’s what did it for y’all?” Sojourner scoffs as she watches Rosie lead the seething princess away, “Not the howling banshee with the blue fox carcass? Unbelievable!” ‘God, do we hate Susan.’ The bear grumbles as she returns to her work. Minutes pass, Sojourner is concentrated deeply on her work when she hears a melodic voice sing out.

 

“Have you ever wanted something

In your mind that was so clear

You could taste it?”

 

“You mean like human flesh?” Susan asks, curiously.

“Uh, sort of.” Charlie answers, hesitantly.

Who is singing? Sojourner recognizes that voice. “Rosie?” It didn’t sound like her.

 

“ Its a feeling like a rumbling in your gut

That you could finally be faced with

A billion needy faces-”

Wait, is that the princess singing? Sojourner digs her binoculars out of Hot Mic and focuses on the singer. She remembers where she’s heard Charlie before, an image of the young woman riding the postal truck singing out, “Happy day in Hell” flashes in her mind. “That was the Princess?” The sailor squeaks, surprised. 

Charlie walks out into the crowd holding Alastor’s microphone as she continues with her song. Sojourner looks towards the red sky, “Where the fuck is that music coming from?” An orchestra swells up around her as Charlie begins tap dancing with the citizens. “Hang on, is this a musical? Why did people start dancing?” 

Sojourner’s confusion builds as the residents of Cannibal Town sing out in chorus. “What the fuck is happening? Does everyone know this song?” She sees Alastor and Rosie dancing with each other as Cannibal Town parades out onto the street, Princess Charlie rides on the shoulders of two strongmen. The ensemble finishes the song with an eight part moving harmony, ending with Charlie’s humble wish.

“I really hope that I’m ready for this.”

Sojourner sits gobsmacked on the damaged roof of Susan’s house. “They sound amazing, but what the hell was that?”

She was not ready for any of that.

Notes:

I cannot stress enough how awful Susan is and how fun it is to write her. If Sojo had one sworn enemy in Hell it's definitely Susan. I also have the head canon that one of Charlie's abilities is to summon orchestral accompaniment whenever she sings and it follows her.

Chapter 55: Ounce of Peace

Summary:

The extermination is upon Hell and the Hazbin Hotel is first to feel the wrath of Heaven. Sojourner and Captain Tailhook hunker down with Toner and Eggy to wait out the storm. How will Sojourner feel when she hears that Adam is dead?

Notes:

I edited this chapter at least three times before I was satisfied with it. If you're writing your own story I recommend that you reread a lot of your previous chapters to help out.

Date: February 16, 2026

Age: 7 ½ years in Hell

Location: Tone-Death Paint Shop

Weather: Ominous with a chance of doom later in the date

Current Conditions: Holed up with Toner, Eggy, and the rest of the gang

 

“Mraow.” Captain Tailhook says as he rubs against his sinner’s leg. The tri-ped feline looks up at Sojourner as she nervously bounces her leg and fiddles with the dog tags around her neck. Zzzt, zzzt, zzzt.

Russell and Toner frown as they watch friend hug herself on the corner of the couch, her eyes glued on the television.

“Mámi, turn that off. You don’t need to watch that.” The painter says softly, “C’mon let’s play some cards.”

“Candlelight is right, sweetie.” Eggy walks over and flips the TV off with the remote. “Come on, I baked some cinnamon rolls, ya favorite.” She takes Sojourner’s hand and leads her to the kitchen table where her husband, Russell, and Penny sit with cards in hand. The bear sits down without a word, she hasn’t said anything all day and barely anything all week. 

“Wanna play some Spades?” Penny offers. Sojourner doesn’t respond, her mind is completely somewhere else. “Knight?” The Army doc gently touches her shoulder, but recoils when Sojourner jumps. “Sorry! I’m sorry.” She apologies and retracts her hand. “I asked if you want to play Spades? Toner needs a partner.”

Red and green eyes look across the table, finally realizing people are talking to her. She shakes her head, “N-no thanks, I don’t think I’d do very well right now.” She mumbles quietly. “Sorry.”

The old falcon sighs with a gentle smile, “Hey, no worries. We can play something else.” He suggests.

“I’m not in the mood.” Sojourner replies sadly, “I think I’m gonna go lie down.” She stands up and heads back to the couch, Capt. following close behind her. The bear picks up her pet and plants kisses all over his fuzzy face as he starts to purr. Approaching the couch, she lies down with her cat on her chest. Shoving her earbuds in, Sojourner puts on a Motown playlist and closes her eyes. Hopefully she'll be able to finally fall asleep today; it’s been four days since she’s gotten more than three hours of fitless sleep. 

Eggy comes back with a runny cinnamon roll with gooey cream cheese icing on a plate to see her friend’s chair empty. Toner points to the couch then makes a sleeping gesture by putting both hands to one side of his face. His wife nods and places the dessert on the table and walks to the back of the couch. Peeking over, she sighs in relief seeing Sojourner in a deep sleep with Captain Tailhook making biscuits with his one front paw. Grabbing a quilt from upstairs, the pastry chef drapes it over Sojourner and turns off the light in the living room area before sitting at the kitchen table with her husband and friends.

BOOOONG BOOONG BOOONG ! 

The loud bells jolt the sleeping sailor, startling herself and her three legged cat awake. 

“Attention everyone, Extermination Day has been cancelled. I say again, "Extermination Day has been cancelled!”

Did they just say cancelled? The Extermination is cancelled? Sojourner looks at her phone with a new alert. Extermination Day is cancelled as per King Lucifer, Ruler of Hell. She sits up in disbelief. Is this a dream?  Looking back towards the kitchen, she sees all her friends locked into their phones screens. Removing her earbuds, Sojourner wraps the blanket around her and gets up to join them.

“Is this for real?” Her voice comes out small as she approaches the table. “It’s cancelled?” 

Toner looks up at her, “It’s true, Mámi. The angels retreated, they won.” 

“They did?” Sojourner walks over and looks at the phone screen. Channel 666 news is covering the story live.

“ Yes, it’s true, Extermination Day has been cancelled. Thanks to Princess Charlie and her ragtag hotel, the exorcists have suffered a humiliating defeat. Our top news stories, King Lucifer has finally made an appearance after a seven year absence, swooping in at the last minute to save his daughter’s ass.” 

A picture of a porcelain-faced man with red rosy cheeks and a red and white ringmaster outfit is shown. A large white top hat with a golden snake and red apple sits on top a head full of platinum blond hair. Six red and white wings protrude from his back.

‘That’s the king?’ Sojourner studies his features, ‘He is absolutely gorgeous.’ No wonder the Bible said he was the most beautiful angel, at least they got that part right.

“ In other news, Adam, First Man and totally fuckable bad boy, has been killed! Stabbed to death by a filthy janitor. ”  

“Wait, what?” Sojourner’s heart drops. A video plays of the large angel cussing at the Princess and her team, his rant is cut short when a tiny little woman stabs him in the back and he falls face first to the ground. She proceeds to stab him again and again while cackling. 

“NOOOOOOOOOO!” A woman’s voice cries out, it's filled with pure anguish and pain. 

“That’s Lute.” Sojourner whispers, watching the one-armed exorcist run to her leader’s side. “She’s the one.” She could never forget her voice.

Toner whips his head to her in shock. “Que? That’s her?” 

Sojourner nods, “She killed Chester.” 

“Sir! SIR! Stay with me, sir!” The exorcist’s voice breaks, “ADAM!” She’s crying.

“Gunny! GUNNY! It’s gonna be okay! I can fix this!” Memories come flooding back to that day. Sojourner remembers the weight of Chester's body in her arms, the warmth of his blood on her face. The kiss goodbye, she touches her lips. “I’m a happy man, gal.” His final words before he had to leave her behind.

“Serves that bitch right!” Eggy snaps, a wide smile stretches across her pink face.

“How’s that feel, bitch?” Penny adds in, “For Pultzer!”

“For Pultzer!” The rest of the house echoes and begins cheering and celebrating. Sojourner stands there, watching the joy and excitement spill out into the room. This is a good thing right? Adam is dead, he’s the reason behind all the exterminations; the reason why Sojourner is different now, weaker now. 

She looks at the frozen phone screen, Lute is hunched over Adam’s body, crying. Why isn’t Sojourner happy? What’s the matter with her? She should be the most excited out of everyone here, now they were even. Lute lost Adam the same way she took Chester from her.

“Let me tell you what.” Gunny’s deep southern voice echoes in her mind, those deep green eyes looking into hers, “Seeing him dead, didn’t give me an ounce of peace.” Sojourner looks at the screen again, remembering the marine's words, “Not one.”

He was right. He was absolutely right.

“I’m sorry, Lute.” She whispers as the room fills with music and laughter. Sojourner wouldn’t wish that kind pain on her worst enemy.

Not one ounce.

Notes:

Wow, those are some complicated feelings, but in the end, Gunny was right. Will Sojourner continue to feel this way?

Chapter 56: New Arrival

Summary:

There's a new arrival in Heaven, Sir Pentious is in the building and Emily couldn't be more excited. Sera on the other hand is quite the opposite, what could this mean for Heaven? Now that Adam is a goner how will that affect Heaven? Who is knows about this?

Notes:

Last update for the week my lovelies. I'll start posting more fanart of my character on my Bluesky later, stay tuned.

Date: February 16, 2026

Age: Ancient, one of the O.G.’s 

Location: High Angelic Courthouse (H.A.C.)

Weather: Perfect with a chance of what the hey hey?

Current Conditions: Fecal matter is about to strike the rotary air mechanism 

 

“Huh? What? Where am I?” A posh, hissy voice asks frantically. A snake with dark skin and wearing a white top hat and coat looks around wildly before turning to Sera and her sister. “Oh! Hello.” He greets shyly.

Sera’s heart drops to the floor as dread fills her body. ‘Is…is that?’ That’s one of the sinners that was under review at the princess’s hearing. Emily’s excited gasp squeaks out in delight. 

“HELLO!” Emily squeals in joy and runs over to him, “You’re here! You’re really here! YOU MADE IT!!” She dances with laughter. “CONGRATULATIONS!” Clapping, the seraphim pulls him into a bone-crushing hug.

WHEEEEEZZE! “Oh, cough ! Th-thank you, my dear!” The snake chokes as the air is squeezed out of him. “Con-congratulationssss on wh- choke whaaat?” He can’t breathe, this young lady is so, so strong.

Emily finally releases him and holds the new winner by the shoulders “Heaven! You’re in Heaven!” She cheers, “You have been redeemed!” Tears spring from her eyes and immediately run down her face. “Charlie’s hotel works! You guys did it!” She sniffs and pulls him back in for a more gentle hug. “I’m so happy for you.” 

Sir Pentious goes into shock, did this young lady just say Heaven? He looks around and sees a larger angel staring at him with… What kind of expression is that? Why does she look horrified? He looks down at the smaller angel hugging him, cautiously, he hugs her back. “I’m in…Heaven?” The seraphim takes his hands in hers, smiling up at him and nodding. Crystal-like tears stream down her beautiful face.

Sniff. “My name is Emily, and this is my sister, Sera.” She gestures to the tall woman, “And you are Sir Pentious, the first redeemed soul to ever enter Heaven!” Bright bursts of light sparkle in the air and rain down like glitter. “Sera, isn’t this amazing? We’ve got to tell everyone!” Emily grabs Sir Pentious’s hand and darts to the exit.

“Emily, wait!” Sera barks, halting the two in their tracks. They turn to her, surprised at the harsh tone. Seeing their shock, the High Seraphim quickly clears her throat and smoothes out her dress. Ahem. “Please pardon my volume,” She excuses herself, “I know you’re excited Emily, but this is a huge deal. Let me call a meeting before we make a big announcement. We don’t want to start a frenzy do we?”

The younger seraphim stares confused, “Why would this cause a frenzy?” She asks, “Wouldn’t the winners be excited that souls can be redeemed? Loved ones can be reunited again!”

“And those who have died by violent hands might see their abusers again.” Sera counters quickly. Emily’s mouth drops open, she hadn’t thought of that. 

“O-oh…” She squeezes Sir Pentious’s hand, “I didn’t think about that.”

“Which is why we must handle this,” Sera looks at Sir Pentious and gives a tight smile, “Unexpected miracle, with careful consideration.” The inventor feels a knot in his stomach, this angel is making him feel uneasy. “Why don’t you take Sir… Pentious was it?” She asks.

“Uh, y-yes, Your Holiness.” The snake answers politely.

Sera smiles at him, her eyes hold nothing. “Yes, you take Sir Pentious and get him situated in one of the suites and then have lunch. I’m sure our new winner is famished.”

Emily lights up, “Okay! C’mon Pen, I’ll show you to your room until we can get you a house!” She intertwines her fingers with his and leads him out of the office.

“I get a house?” The inventor asks, following Emily.

“Yeah, and if you’d like I can help decora-” The elevator door closes. Sera sees her reflection on the clean surface, a look of pure horror etched on her beautiful features. This can’t be happening, redemption is impossible. Why was this sinner, a snake no less, able to bypass the gates?

“Stay calm.” She coaches herself, pacing back and forth. “Adam, I need to speak to-” The elevator door opens, tp, tp, tp. Sera turns around and jumps at the gruesome scene in front of her. “L-Lute?” She breathes. Lute stands before her, war-torn and bloodied, gold drips from her missing limb and she leans against the wall, wheezing.

“Your Holiness.” The wounded exorcist grits from clenched teeth. “I have regrettable news.”

__________

Michael’s office

 

“Because I just don’t understand. If you were having such a good time and you like doing handiwork, why did you stop going to the Rainbow Bridge?” Raphael questions as he follows his smaller brother around his office.

“As I’ve said before, Abel doesn’t want me around.” Michael states bluntly.

“Did he say that?” The healer challenges, his stethoscope slides around his neck. “Did he say ‘Michael, I don’t want to see you anymore’?”

“He didn’t have to.” The warrior argues back, he grabs another pile of blue case files and puts them in a cabinet. 

“Then you don’t know!” Raphael says impatiently.

“Yes, I do.” Michael counters, almost bumping into his brother. He steps around to walk back to his desk to grab red files. Raphael blocks him.

“How do you know, huh?” The archangel gets in the way, “How do you know what Abel is thinking without him telling you?”

“Because I know what being shut out feels like!” Michael finally snaps. Raphael jumps and takes a step back. “I know what it means when answers get short and curt, their backs turn on me, and they stop looking me in the eye. I get it!” The warrior angel glares at his brother. “I am all too familiar with knowing that people don’t want me around!”

Hazel eyes look sadly into gold ones, “Michael, that’s not tr-”

“Yes, it is!” His voice cracks, “Are you really going to stand here and act like you don’t see the rest of your family ostracize me? The dinners, the meetings, the forced ‘family’ events! They all know I’m there and wish that I wasn’t!”

Raphael falls silent. Michael’s right, he knows he’s right. It’s no secret how all their siblings save for him, Gabriel, and Azrael don’t spare Michael a second glance. He hears whispers and gossip all the time, but he doesn’t fight it. He can’t, if he does, he might be seen as sympathizing with him . Raphael knows that’s why they treat Michael the way they do, he’s the twin, the spitting image of him.  

The healing archangel looks away from his brother, shame floods his system and flushes his cheeks gold. “Michael, I- I.”

“Save it.” The twin cuts him off, “I don’t want to hear it.” He turns his back away from his brother and leans his hands on his desk. “Get out.” Raphael reaches for his brother but stops. Heaving a heavy sigh, he exits the room, leaving Michael alone. 

The warrior stands for a minute before straightening up and sitting back down at his desk. He grabs a gray case file and opens it. SHRRRING! A bright flash of light appears behind the file. Tilting his head to the side, Michael’s eyes widen as a golden file glows on his desk.

“What in the world?” He whispers, placing the gray file down and picking up the glowing one. Squinting, Michael opens the files and reads the name Sir Stuart Pentious, Born: January 25, 1824, Died: March 03, 1859, Cause of Death: Rigid airship crash, Former status: Sinner, Current Status: Redeemed.

“Redeemed?” Michael asks, confused, “What do you mean redeemed?” He flips through the paperwork. The Victorian inventor was damned in the 1800’s when he successfully built the first functioning prototype of a death ray. He fired his creation on the Lipton noble estate as revenge for stealing his ideas and embarrassing him at the World Fair. 

Stuart Pentious or Sir Pentious as he titled himself, was responsible for nearly ending the Lipton bloodline when his death ray destroyed their prized fountain, missing the household entirely. Unfortunately, the death ray emitted electrostatic discharge and ignited the flammable gases inside his rigid airship, causing it to explode and crash into the manor, killing everyone inside except for one sole grandson who was three at the time. 

“Lipton, Lipton. Why does that sound familiar?” Michael goes to his filing cabinet and opens the I-L drawer. “Here they are.” He pulls out the Lipton family file, all of them are red. “I remember, they experimented their dangerous inventions on the lower working class. They’re horrible!” 

Michael reads down further, the last living descendant, Lyle Lipton, died recently. “He was crushed by a piano?” What kind of Looney Tunes type death is that? ‘Doesn’t matter now.’ The archangel shrugs and puts the file back in place and picks up Sir Pentious’s file. “I need to talk to Sera about this.” He leaves his office and heads upstairs.

_____________

High Seraphim Office

 

“It was a small maid, sir.” Lute reports as Raphael tends to her wounds. “She blitzed him from behind and st-stabbed him.” The lieutenant clears her throat before she chokes up. “I couldn’t recover his body before Lucifer banished us.” 

“How many exorcists were killed?” Azrael asks, his tall frame stands before the window with his arms tucked behind his back.

“147 sir. Over half our fleet.” Lute grits through her teeth. She yelps as Raphael cauterizes the amputated arm.

“Almost done.” Raphael says, apologetically. “Hang in there.”

Sera turns over the halo in her hands, it has lost its ethereal glow and the two gems are missing. She wipes the gold blood of the precious metal, “Gabriel.”

“Yes?” The messenger answers quietly, his eyes are red from crying.

“Will you please go get Abel?” Sera doesn’t take her eyes off of Adam’s halo.

The burly angel wipes his face with his long sleeve and nods, “Of course.” He obeys and walks to the balcony, gold and lily white wings sprout out as he takes to the skies over to the Rainbow Bridge.

“How do you want to handle this?” Azrael asks, not moving from his spot in front of the window. “The council will have to be informed.”

“In due time, I want to tell Abel, Emily, and Michael privately.” Sera sighs, “Especially Abel, he will need support knowing his father is dead.”

“What do you mean ‘dead’?” A quiet voice asks. 

Sera, Azrael, and Raphael all turn to see Abel and Michael standing in the open elevator. Abel has a disbelieving smile on his face. “What happened to my dad?” He chuckles as the two step off the elevator.

Michael looks to Raphael and sees Lute’s injuries. ‘What happened to her?’ Lute glares at him and turns away, pure hate is etched on her scratched up face.

“S-sera?” Abel asks again, tentatively walking up to the High Seraphim, “Where’s dad? He should be back by now.”

The leader looks down at the winner’s sweet face as he searches her face for answers. “Abel, Michael, please sit down.”

The shepherd takes a step back, “No. No, thank you, where is my dad?” The question is forceful as panic starts to set in. “Sera, where’s my dad? Why won’t you tell me?” He looks down at her hands and instantly recognizes the object. “Why do you have his halo? WHERE IS MY DAD?”

Azrael steps forward, “Abel, stand down!” He orders darkly.

“Get away from him.” Michael snarls, his eyes immediately glow at the Angel of Death.

“Michael, no!” Raphael jumps up and stands in his line of sight, “Stay calm, it’s okay.” His calming aura radiates in the room, “Everyone, calm down.” The soothing energy deescalates the rising tension in the room.

Tears pour down Abel’s face, “What happened?” He breaks down, dropping to his knees. “Dad…”

Sera kneels down and places a gentle hand on the sobbing man. “Abel, I’m so sorry to tell you that-”

Michael’s ears start ringing as he listens to the demise of the First Man. Sir Pentious’s golden file lies forgotten on the floor.

The new arrival will have to wait.

___________

?????

Well, that was interesting. Though she must admit, Roo is a bit disappointed she missed the opportunity to kill Adam herself. At least there’s another man in mind she’d like to kill for failing her, Alastor. “You haven’t been doing what you’re told, little deer.” The entity sneered. 

Before she let him off leash, Roo was very clear in her instructions: Find and establish himself with the princess, plant his radios so she could listen to what they’re doing, and make as many deals as possible to make himself stronger. And now, the red idiot went and got himself fucked up trying to battle Adam.

“What the fuck was he thinking?” Roo snarls, eyes appear in her wild locks as her temper flares. “If he couldn’t even beat his dvd player of an ex, what the fuck makes him think he could fight Adam?” She stomps to the full bar and pours herself a ‘Sidecar’, “And after all that work of feeding him souls, unbelievable.” Scoffing, Roo picks up the microphone and brings it to her black lips, “Alastor?” Silence. “ALASTOR!” Static. 

Oh, that’s right, his staff got sliced into by that big, dead idiot. “Son of a bitch!” The cocktail glass shatters in Roo’s hand. “Now, I gotta go down and fix that fuckin’ thing!” She flops down at her desk and throws the device on the surface. “Well, let’s see what’s happening with Angel Radio.” She grumbles and tunes in the frequency to the H.A.C.

“So it is possible? The hotel actually works?” Gabriel is speaking. With a little too much excitement for Roo’s liking. 

“Yes, he appeared before me and Emily this afternoon. He’s a serpent that Adam killed in the battle.” Sera answers, she doesn’t sound too happy.

‘That makes two of us, sister.’ Roo scoffs and takes a sip of her beverage.

“Who else knows about this besides us and Michael?” That dark, husky voice, Azrael. 

“Mmmmm~” Roo purrs, “Hello, sexy.” She really likes the Angel of Death. So obedient, so ruthless, and the best part: he tortures Michael all in the name of being ‘Daddy’s’ good little bitch.

“Emily.” The High Seraphim replies, “I managed to curb her enthusiasm by distracting her with getting the snake settled.”

“I still can’t believe it.” Raphael mutters, “Redemption really is possible.”

Wait.

What?

“What the fuck did he just say?” Roo asks, sitting up. “Redemption works? A fucking serpent was redeemed?” 

“If that’s the case, then maybe we should consider giving the hotel a real chance!” Gabriel suggests excitedly. “Does Lucifer know a sinner has been redeemed?”

“He better not!” Roo snarls, standing up. “Y’all better say a fuckin’ thing either!”

“I don’t believe so, how would he know?” Sera answers, thoughtfully. “I think we should question the serpent before we make any moves. We need to find out exactly what he did before Adam killed him.”

Okay, at least that stuck up prude is moving cautiously. That will give Roo a little time to think of a plan. She cannot have Heaven and Hell start working together, the more in sync they are, the more they’re likely to figure out she’s up here. 

Roo needs to derail this hotel and soon. The biggest problem is, how does she do that while maintaining her ruse? It doesn't help that she wants to savor every moment of this chaos. She smiles excitedly.

Finally, things are getting fun.

Notes:

Aw, man poor Abel, hopefully he'll process this in a healthy way. Also our big baddie now knows that redemption is possible what will she do with this info? Won't be anything good for anyone else involved that's for sure.

Chapter 57: A Fresh Start

Summary:

Baxter has joined the ranks of the hotel and is given a tour by Charlie! Meanwhile, Alastor is dealing with the aftermath of his battle with Adam.

Notes:

It's this week y'all the HELLAVERSE UPDATE is the week! Let's GOOOOOOO!

Date: March 12, 2026

Age: 120 something Years old

Location: Hazbin Hotel

Weather: Nice and breezy

Current Condition: Welcoming a new guest

Charlie can barely contain her excitement as she bounces down the hallway, dragging the anglerfish scientist with her. The short man stumbles as he is man-handled throughout the hotel, his briefcase scuttling frantically behind them.

“And here is our brand-new elevator! And this is our grand staircase! This is our front desk and bar! And this is Husk, our check -in manager and the best bartender.” She drags the little man up the stairs, his black boot falls off in the process.

“Someone should go save him.” Angel Dust suggests, sipping his martini. “Oh, he lost his shoe.” 

“Hmm.” Husk agrees, nodding and taking a pull off his signature bottle of cheap booze. 

Charlie’s hyper voice fades as she runs upstairs, her footsteps can be heard overhead. THUMP! The sound of a body hitting the floor thunks against the ceiling. 

“Oops! Are you okay?” The princess’s question is muffled as she checks on Baxter. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to trip over you!”

“Then please stop dragging m-” The scientist demands before being cut off by Charlie dragging him again. 

“And this is our second floor!” Charlie begins the tour again. “And this is our left hallway! Over here is the right side!”

“Where do ya think she gets the energy from?” Cherri asks, swirling her glass around. She snorts as she hears them trip again. “Thank Satan, she didn’t do that with me.”

Vaggie comes jogging up to the trio, “Have you guys seen Charlie and Pen- Baxter!” The angel corrects herself, damn, now she’s messing his name up too. The three sinners point to the ceiling, snickering.

“And there’s a third floor!” Charlie says excitedly, getting further away.

“Aw, shit!” Vaggie swears and runs to the elevator, “I told her to wait for me!” She grumbles, pressing the up button repeatedly, “BABE! I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO SIT DOWN WITH HIM FIRST!” Ding! The elevator door opens and she darts inside. “BABE!” The doors close.

__________

1129, Radio Tower

Blood drips down Alastor’s chin as he bites down on his lip in pain. Sharp bursts of static feedback emit from his body as he slowly unwraps his festering chest wound. The smell of rotting flesh churns his stomach as he removes the last of the bandages. 

Suppressing a gag, his shaking hands grab a clean towel and a bottle of Everclear and place the items on his lap. Folding his coat in half, he places the garment between his sharp, gold teeth and bites down. Taking a deep breath, he opens the bottle of alcohol and holds the towel underneath his wound. 

“That’s gonna suck you know.” An amused voice comments, startling the Radio Demon.

Alastor whips around and almost drops the bottle, his red eyes grow to the size of saucers as he sees the King of Hell standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. Scrambling to cover himself, Alastor’s eyes blacken to ticking red dials as green thread criss-crosses over his smile. Glowing green voodoo sigils float around him as his black antlers grow into threatening branches.

“Oh, shut up, you’re not scarin’ anyone.” Lucifer rolls his eyes as he closes the door behind him. “I was wondering what that horrendous stench of decay was coming from. Almost said to myself, ‘man, Alastor should really close his legs.’ but decided against it. That would have been rude to say.” The angel smirks to himself as he lazily crosses the room. 

Alastor backs up against his desk, nearly knocking the medical supplies off. The deer demon’s hackles rise as the king gets into his personal space. Lucifer draws air in a long hiss, “Wow, that looks woof.” He grimaces, pushing Alastor's hand away from his chest with his finger. “What happened?”

“ Get out! ” Eldritch voices laced with static, snarl. Alastor grows in size, “ Don’t touch me! ” Red drool drips from his gnarled, elongated teeth.

“Down boy,” Lucifer snaps his fingers, reducing Alastor back to his normal form and binding him to his chair, “You’re already on death’s second door, relax.” The king huffs, pulling off his coat and rolling up his sleeves. He studies the injured overlord, watching him pull in ragged breath and twitch in pain. “Did you get this from Adam?” Lucifer asks, taking off his hat and leaning down on his knees to get a better look at the wound. 

Receiving no answer, the king glances up, Alastor is unconscious with a tense smile. “Hmmm, it's probably for the best that you’re not awake right now.” Lucifer cracks his knuckles and then his neck, rotating his shoulders. He places his hands over Alastor’s heart and injury, the angelic grace inside the sinner responds to his touch. “Because this is gonna suck big time.”

___________

2034, March 15, 2025 Alastor’s Suite

Buzzing cicadas and croaking frogs are heard under the sound of Louis Armstrong’s La Vie en Rose playing softly on the vintage record player. Groaning, Alastor opens his heavy eyes to the fireflies that float above his bed. He sits up, hissing at the stinging pain in his bare chest, his hand flies up to his injury. “What in the?” Red fingertips graze fresh bandages wrapped snuggly around his body. Looking down, he pulls the bandage out to see clean stitches underneath.

“Hey, leave it!” Lucifer snaps from the armchair in the lounge area, “I just changed those an hour ago, don’t fuck with them!” He settles back down, returning to his book and taking a sip of rye.

“Wh-what are you doing in my room?” Alastor struggles to ask the question, his throat is dry.

“What’s it look like I’m doing? I’m reading.” The king answers, resting his cheek on his fist and bouncing his leg to the music. “Water’s right next to you.” He points to the bedside table. 

Alastor grabs the water and gulps it down, Lucifer snaps his fingers and the glass refills again. 

“If you drink too fast, you’ll barf.” The angel mutters while turning a page. “Slow down.” 

Grumbling, Alastor reluctantly obeys, he wipes a dribble of water that spilled off his pointed chin. “What did you do to me?”

“Got rid of that pesky Grace that was killing you.” Lucifer answers, taking another sip of rye. “And stitched your chest up. The smell was making me nauseous.” He finishes off his glass and puts the book on the coffee table before he stands up and stretches.

Alastor runs his hand over his bandages. It’s true, the excruciating pain that pulsated through his body is gone. He feels lighter, energetic, stronger . “Don’t expect a thank you from me.” He grumbles, “I didn’t ask for your help.”

Lucifer groans and rolls his eyes, fuck, is this man insufferable, “Right, because you had everything under control before. Goddamn it, is your ego so big that you can’t accept even a little help? I don’t know how you’ve been walking around with a wound like that, let alone hiding it from everyone.” 

The king shakes his head. “I don’t expect a thank you, you jackass, here!” A rod lands on the foot of the bed, Alastor’s staff lie there fully restored. “Now, we’re even, you saved Charlie’s life and I saved yours.” Lucifer opens the door to leave, “You’re welcome.” The door closes behind him.

Alastor stares at his repaired staff, cautiously picking it up. The red eye is closed, “Hello, is this thing on?” The microphone blinks open and looks at him happily.

“Well, I can hear loud and clear!” It replies enthusiastically. Alastor chuckles.

“Good to have you back, old pal.”

Notes:

I rolled the die to see if it was Lucifer or Roo that would show up to heal Alastor. Luckily, the odds were in his favor. For now.

Chapter 58: Reminisce

Summary:

Sojourner shares stories about herself with Carmilla and her daughters and goes further than she intended to. Just a reminder that healing is not linear.

Notes:

Ngl, I made myself upset writing this chapter. I had to revisit chapter 38 and reread that sad occasion.
TW: PTSD, PANIC ATTACKS, FLASH BACKS!

Date: March 18, 2026

Age: Almost 8 years dead

Location: Tone-Death Paintshop

Weather: Getting warm like 75*F or something

Current Conditions: Knocking down walls for more space

“Hey, sweep that up, don’t make her do it!” Byson orders, the young sinners all grumble but obey. “This is your room! You clean it up, she just made more space.” 

A new chihuahua sinner kicks a piece of debris. “We’re not the ones who made the mess. Why can’t that Care Bear clean up after herself?” The collar of his basketball jersey is snatched up to face the large ox sinner.

“Her name is Sojourner.” Byson growls, looming over the trembling kid, “And I better not ever hear you disrespect her again, got it? ” A hot puff of air is snorted in the dog’s face.

“Ye-yeah, okay.” The chihuahua nods frantically in fear.

“You answer with ‘Yes, sir’, ‘no, sir’, ‘yes, ma’am’, or ‘no, ma’am’!” Byson pulls him closer, his grip on the kid’s jersey tightens as he lifts him up with one hand.

“Yes, sir!” The young sinner panics, holding Byson’s hand to keep himself from choking, his feet dangle in the air.

“And that goes for all you punks!” Byson barks at the huddled group of frightened young men, “You are gonna learn some manners if you’re gonna live here, understand?”

“Yes, sir!” They answer in unison.

“By! What are you doing?” Sojourner has an earbud between her fingers, “Put him down!” The chihuahua is dropped on his rear, he scoots back to his three friends that help him up. She walks over to him, “Rodney, you okay, dude?” Concern is set on her features. 

Nodding frantically again, he answers, “Y-yes, ma’am.” He stammers looking down at her, “I’m fine.”

Narrowing her mismatched eyes, Sojourner turns to the ox sinner, “Byson, don’t grab him like that, come on now!” She scolds with her hands on her hips.

“Just nipping some bad behaviors in the bud, Sojo.” Byson apologizes sweetly, “Won’t happen again.” He crosses his heart while holding up the scout’s honor. “Cross my heart.”

Sojourner eyeballs her friend before putting her earbud back in and returning to her work. The ox gives the youngsters another hard look before snapping his fingers and pointing to the cleaning supplies, they immediately get to work.

Four days ago, Toner had taken in the group of four college kids that had died doing a dare in a condemned corporate building. They had live streamed themselves setting off fireworks when a stray rocket destroyed the support pillar and brought the building down on them. 

Toner had caught the youngsters vandalizing Eggy’s bakery a few days ago and sicked his paintshop on them. He gave the kids a choice, go under contract and work for him and his wife or they kill them, it was a pretty easy choice to make. The kids having no place to go, Toner asked Sojourner to knock down a few walls to open up more space in the full firehouse for their bedrooms; she was just finishing up.

“Alright, my loves.” Dusting off her hands, “It’s not pretty right now, but you have a bedroom!” Sojourner flourishes to the open space. “I’ll come by tomorrow to help set up the beds, but for now you have a space to sleep!”

“Thank you, ma’am” The boys chime together, all standing at attention to thank her properly.

Raising an eyebrow, the sailor smirks, “So militant.” She laughs, “Y’all don’t have to call me ma’am. I work for a living.”

“Huh?” Rodney asks, tilting his head to the side.

“It’s a Navy joke, we enlisted say it to compare ourselves to officers, nevermind.” Sojourner waves her hand and shakes her head. “Sorry for the mess, I want to stay and help, but I have another job to do, babies.”

“I-it’s alright, Ms.” Donny, a blue and green parakeet sinner says, “It’s our room, so we’ll clean it up.” He eyes Byson, who’s standing behind Sojourner, the ox nods in approval. 

Dark, plump lips spread into a warm smile, “Y’all are good kids. I got to go, lovelies, hasta la bye bye.” She waves goodbye and squeezes Byson’s arm on the way out.

“Hasta la bye bye?” Sid, a raccoon, questions, “That’s a new one.”

“I like her, she’s nice.” Donny comments as he begins to sweep.

“She’s pretty.” Patrick, the opossum sighs, “And she called me baby.”

“She called all of us ‘baby’, you’re not special!” Rodney retorts.

“What? You think she likes you , Taco Bell?” Sid argues, “Everyone knows girls like raccoons! They call us trash pandas because we’re adorable.”

Byson watches as the boys begin arguing and he smirks. He remembers the first time he laid eyes on Sojourner, he was just as smitten. ‘Guess she has that effect on everyone.’ “Hurry up and finish cleaning. Donny, you and Sid are going to Eggy’s for the day and working in the bakery. Rod and Pat, you two are with me and cleaning the paint guns.”

The boys hush up and look at Byson, “Yes, sir.” They answer all at once.

The large ox nods, “Fast learners, good.” He heads downstairs.

____________

1243, Carmine Tower, Hangar- Industrial District

“Sojo, I’m curious.” Clara asks as she spins on the rolling stool. “How in the world do you know how to fix a tank?” Her sister looks up from her phone, intrigued by the question.

Braids pop out from the top of the war vehicle, “How do I know how to fix tanks?” Spinning her ratchet, Sojourner climbs out and sits on the rim of the entrance. “My buddy, Chester. He was a tank mechanic and taught me all about vehicle repair.”

“Was he in the Navy like you?” Odette asks as she adjusts her glasses. 

Sojourner smiles, “The Navy doesn’t have tanks, girly. The Marine Corps and army do though.”

“Which branch was your friend in?” Clara spins again and almost loses her balance, grabbing onto her sister for stability.

“Marine Corps.” The sailor answers, “He was a Master Gunnery Sergeant, huge deal.”

“Were you of equivalent rank?” Odette holds her dizzy sister steady. “Stop spinning.” She scolds.

Shaking her head, “Mm-mmm. I was an E-6, Gunny was an E-9.” She explains. “Regardless of branch, he would be my senior in uniform.”

“Is that why you address him by his rank?” Clara asks as she finally regains her balance. Odette releases her, but holds her hands out to make sure she doesn’t fall over.

“At first, but then it just became a nickname for him.” Sojourner rests her chin on her hands as she leans on the hatch, reminiscing. It feels nice to talk about her fallen friend, it still makes her chest tight, but the grief isn’t as strong anymore.

The sisters study their friend as she begins to space out. “Did he address you by rank as well?” 

Sojourner snorts, “Nope, only once I think when he was apologizing. Though in the beginning of our relationship, I kept tellin’ him to.” She gets a distant look in her eyes. “Called me everything but my rank now that I think about it.”

“What was his name for you?” Clara asks, resting against Odette.

A loving smile spreads across the bear’s face, “Sojo. Gal, I really liked that one, he would use it when he was bein’ sweet to me.” The German shepherd’s smiling face dances in her vision. “But my favorite was Squid, I love that one the most.”

Odette crinkles her nose, “Squid? You’re a bear.” Clara shares her sister’s question. “Why ‘Squid’?” They ask together.

“It’s a term other branches use to jeer marineros , no?” Carmilla walks into the hangar, her pointed toes tap sharply on the floor. She runs her hands over her daughters’ hair and looks up at Sojourner with a smile.

“Sí, Señora.” She replies back, returning her smile. “¿Cómo va su día?” She climbs down from the tank.

“Bien, gracias. How go the repairs?” The overlord asks, walking around the tank.

“I found the short that was messing up the aiming system. I replaced the switch and the system ran up like normal. Of course, I can’t test it to truly find out, so when it is tested, please let me know if anything else is glitching.” Sojourner looks through her phone, “The interior lighting system will need a new control box, I need to dig into this more to figure out the issue. Unless, you would like your techs to inspect it instead?” She holds up the little black box, offering it to Carmilla. 

The arms dealer shakes her head. “I know you will give me a faster turnaround time. You may take it with you so you can work on it when you have time.” 

“Understood.” Sojourner places the object down and begins checking her tools.

“Mama, how was the meeting?” Clara asks as she stands up to stretch.

Carmilla scowls, “It would been more productive if the Vee’s actually brought anything of substance to the table. Vox has been hounding me to cut him a discount on weapons so that he can design “Angelic Securtiy” prototypes.” She finger quotes the TV Demon’s idea, “Since the victory at the hotel, our orders have skyrocketed. Bullets, guns, explosives, armor, etc.” The tired mother rubs her neck, attempting to relieve some tension. 

“Are angelic weapons really that sought after?” Sojourner asks, curiously. “What gives the metal its quality that makes them deadly to angels?”

“My contact explained that the metal is crafted with angel dna: feathers, blood, and grace.” Carmilla explains as she leans against the armored vehicle. Crossing her arms, she continues, “Regular weapons or “tainted” metal as my contact calls it, can only cause temporary damage and not a lot of pain. The higher level the angel, the less effective our weapons are.”

Sojourner pauses, “How many levels of angels are there?” She starts pulling at one of her braids near her face. “What would level would an exorcist or Adam be?”

Carmilla thinks it over, “An excorcist would be above a regular winner or heavenborn, and Adam would be in a league that mirrors the rank of a prophet. Then, there are sepharim, six winged angels. Next, are the archangels, the Prince of Heaven and finally, God.”

“I see…” Sojourner says quietly, looking off to the side.

“Are you alright, Sojo?” Clara asks, leaning over to look at her face, “What’s that look for?”

The bear doesn’t answer at first, lost deep in her thoughts. Clara waves her hand in front of her face, “Hellooo? Hell to Sojo?” 

Sojourner snaps out of it and looks up at her friend. “Oh, sorry. Say again, Clar?” ‘Was it a seraphim or an archangel that was there that day?’ She wonders to herself.

“She asked if you’re alright, you suddenly got quiet.” Odette clarifies, “Something on your mind?”

Sojourner shakes her head, “Just thinking about the exterminations, did you guys ever see a six winged one while y’all were out? Would’ve had blue and gold wings?” The women look at her stunned.

“How did you know it had blue and gold wings?” Carmilla asks, standing up from the tank. “Everyone who has encountered it has died.” She remember seeing blurred footage of the angel, its golden sword devastating dozens by the single swing of its blade. That information was only privy to the overlords, curtesy of Vox’s drones.

Sojourner shrinks back, intimidated by the shift in tone, “I, uh, I saw it.” She answers meekly. What’s wrong with Señora? Why did the atmosphere suddenly shift? 

“How?” Odettte stands up slowly with her sister. “Where did you see it?”

The sailor swallows nervously, did she say something wrong? “I saw it on streets, during Extermination Day.”

“Why were you outside during Extermination Day?” Clara snaps, horrified. “On the streets of all places?”

‘Oh, fuck.’ Sojourner gulps, realizing she messed up, ‘Should I tell them the truth?’

“Do not lie to me, young lady.” Carmilla warns as she looms over her. “Answer the question.”

Sojourner stares into Carmilla’s searing red eyes, “Gunny and I were rescuing sinners. We were supposed to rendezvous at checkpoint 8, but he didn’t show. I breached the manhole that I had been traveling in and saw him facing off against Adam.” The sailor whispers, “I threw the sewer cover at Adam and clipped his shoulder when Lute attacked me from behind.” 

That fateful day plays back in her mind, “I managed to dodge and pin her to the ground and start punching her while Gunny fought Adam.” Sojourner feels the metal mask beat against her knuckles, her hands flex out of instinct. 

“The blue and gold angel stopped Gunny from crushing Adam’s knee with the sewer cover and shouted ‘enough’. It was like all the fight I had in me had been ripped away, I was terrified.” She remembers the suffocating presence of the angel and shivers. The tools and spare parts fly off the bolted down table. Carmilla stands up alarmed. “Lute threw me off her and was about to stab me when the bell rang.” BOOONG! BOOONG! BOONG!  

Her breathing turns shallow as she begins to tremble, “The day was over, they were supposed to stop.” The look of pure cruelty in Lute’s smile is seared into Sojourner’s memory, “He wasn’t supposed to die!” The metal table rips from the floor and is flung into the far wall, the tank groans.

Instinctively, Carmilla moves in front of her daughters. “Sojourner!” She calls out, pushing Clara and Odetta back. “Calm down!” 

Tears pour out like a faucet down dark brown fur, the red and green position lights on the sailor’s arms and eyes glow to a blinding brightness, “HE SHOULD BE HERE WITH ME! THEY CHEATED! ” Red and green irises have blown out to black orbs as bright, yellow light emanates from her eyes. The heavy armored vehicle scrapes the pristine white floor as a shockwave forces it back. Hot Mic growls in desperation, calling for help. 

“Girls, run!” Carmilla orders and pushes her daughters away. Shielding her face from the intense pressure, she pushees her way to the distressed girl. 

“MOM, DON’T HURT HER!” Clara cries as Odette pulls her sister away, “HELP HER!” 

The sound of a turbine engine starting up begins to roar, heat radiates from the small sinner. Carmilla finally reaches her and grabs her face in her large hands. “SOJOURNER!” She screams, forcing the woman to look at her, “WAKE UP!” The engine stops, making the heat dissipate.  The tank stops moving, deep skid marks are left in its wake. Metal tools rain down to the floor, causing sharp rings to clang out and echo in the large space. 

Sojourner pulls in choked breaths as her vision clears, she sees Carmilla in front of her. She’s talking, but loud ringing is all Sojourner can hear. Trembling, the bear places her hands on top of the overlord’s, she tries to form words, but can’t get her body to obey. She begins to sob, it’s not right, Gunny should be here with her. “L-lo…lo sie-siento… lo siento, lo siento.” Sojourner finally manages to choke out, she closes her eyes in shame. “Perdóname, por favor. Señora, por favor.”

Carmilla pulls her into her arms, “Está bien, mija. Shhhh.” Sojourner wraps her arms around the mother’s waist and buries her face, continuing to cry. Carmilla holds her until she has no tears left. Hiccuping Sojourner pulls away, unable to meet her eyes.

“I am so sorry, Señora.” Her voice croaks, laden with weariness, “I didn’t mean to slip like that. It’s just…” She takes a shuddering breath, “You were upset with me and I don’t talk about that day often because…” Sojourner chokes up again and turns away. “I don’t like to remember that day.” Her voice wavers after heaving a deep sigh. 

She looks around at the hangar bay, parts are strewn across the floor mixing with tools and papers. The metal desk that Odette and Clara were sitting at is upside down against the opposite side of the space with damage done to the nearby wall. The tank is 20 feet away from where it originally stood with deep gouges in the floor. Reality hits her like a ton of bricks, she has destroyed Carmilla Carmine’s hangar. “Oh, no…” She whispers as dread sets in.

Carmilla follows Sojourner’s eyes and shakes her head. “Don’t worry about it, mija. You were having a panic attack, it’s okay.” She says gently. “I didn’t intend to frighten you, I apologize.” She smoothes back her long, white hair that had gotten knocked loose. “We’re done for today. Do not worry about the hangar, it is mostly cosmetic damage.” She picks up the light control box and hands it to Sojourner. “Cancel the rest of your appointments for today, go home, and rest.” The overlord commands sternly. “¿Lo entiendes?”

“Entiendo, sí.” Sojourner obeys, embarrassment and shame quickly taking over her senses. 

“Bien, mija. Girls, walk her to her van.” Carmilla beckons Odette and Clara over, gently pushing Sojourner towards them.

“Come on, Sojo. It’s alright.” Clara says softly, placing her arms around her shoulders.

Carmilla watches the girls leave and calls for facilities to clean up the hangar; she doesn’t bother giving them an explanation as she heads up to her office. Zestial sips from his tea cup as he reads the afternoon newspaper, he perks up when the office door opens and his friend walks in. Surprised by her disheveled appearance, the former overlord places his tea and reading material down, crossing one leg over the other. “Hast thou found combat within thy homestead, dear friend?” He inquires, bouncing his leg.

“Not quite, but I may have made a stunning discovery.” Carmilla replies as she sits down and laces her fingers on her desk.

“Oh? Pray, what thou hast seen?” The spider chuffs excitedly.

“We may have a new overlord in our midst.” The arms dealer confesses.

A stunning discovery indeed.

________________

1302 , Outside Carmine Tower , Limousine

“What the fuck is taking them so long?” Valentino snarls impatiently, blowing out a red puff of smoke that fills the interior of the luxury vehicle. “¡Putas mierdas! I swear to god, if their asses aren’t down here in the next two minutes, I’m leaving.” The moth rolls down his window to air out the car when he sees an interesting sight: Carmilla’s daughters are walking that little trickster back to her van. 

“Mi eso osita.” A trickle of drool runs down his chin, “There you are, baby. I’ve been wondering where you’ve been hiding.” Valentino pulls up Sojourner’s photo and smiles. He’s tried to get in contact with the electrician since the day she spewed her lunch all over his boyfriend and humiliated him. The pimp has his own personal score to settle with her, as much as he enjoys a clever ruse, he doesn’t appreciate being made a fool. Besides, she’s still very much someone the director wants in his films.

“Oy, Travis.” Valentino knocks on the divider, it rolls down.

“Yeah, boss?” The owl answers, turning to look at the moth.

Taking another drag off his cigarette, “Follow that car.” Valentino demands, pointing to the Devil Dog’s van pulling off and driving away. “Don’t tip her off.”

“Yes, sir.” The divider rolls back up and the limo takes off.

“I have an offer for you, mamasita.” A sadistic smile curls on the lavender face as more drool drips down his chin.

________________

Two minutes later, Outside Carmine Tower, Industrial District

Vox and Velvette walk out, irritated that Carmilla blew them off. 

“Swear to Christ, that bitch better watch herself or-” Vox’s threat gets cut off when he almost runs into his shorter business partner. “What the fuck, V3lV3tTe? He glitches in anger.

“Where the fuck is the limo?” The doll demands, looking both ways down the street. 

Vox looks around and glitches again.

“4 FuCK’$ S@K3, V@l!”

Notes:

Poor Sojo, she may not ever be over Gunny, but at least she has more friends to help her than she thought. Meanwhile, Carmilla recognizes game when she sees, will she tell Sojo or investigate a bit more?

Chapter 59: Don't Tread on Me

Summary:

Sojourner is worn out by her panic attack at Carmilla's and goes home for the day. However, while closing up shop, she gets an unexpected and unwanted visitor.

Notes:

HEAVY TRIGGER WARNINGS!: ATTEMPTED RAPE WITH CLEAR BORDER OF THE ASSAULT

Date: March 18, 2026

Age: Died at 30, 7 years ago

Location:  Devil Dog’s Electrical and Mechanical Repairs

Weather: Starting to get stormy

Current Conditions: Just got home and about to close up shop

 

**** TRIGGER WARNING! ATTEMPTED R@PE OCCURS IN THIS CHAPTER! WHEN YOU SEE “****” BORDER THE ATTACK BEGINS “****” ENDS THE SCENE!******

 

“Thanks for understanding, Mox. Tell Blitzø I’ll fix the wall tomorrow, bye.” Sojourner sighs and tosses her phone on the counter, laying her forehead down on the hard surface with a drawn out groan. Holy crap, she’s exhausted, but panic attacks will do that. “I need to reread “ Coping with Grief ” again. I relapsed really bad today.” She mutters, pulling herself back up. 

“Meow, meeooooow!” Captain Tailhook calls out to her from the other side of the door. 

Grinning, Sojourner goes to open the apartment entrance and the handle fights back, it’s locked. “Aw, shit.” She whispers, reaching into her pocket for the keys. Her head thunks against the door, “You put them in the bowl by the garage door like you always do, you creature of habit.” A little white paw pushes underneath the door, scratching at her tan boot. Sojourner chuckles, “I gotta go back around, buddy. Lemme close up shop real quick.” The cat meows in protest. “Yep, you gotta be a man ‘bout it, dude. Sorry.”

Ducking under the counter’s movable hatch, Sojourner flips the open sign to close and pulls down the metal sheet for the large window. Brr! Brr! A text message.The electrician sighs and returns back to her phone, reading the message. “Oh, Blitzø, do not talk to me about professionalism! The foul shit that flies out of that port-a-john you call a mouth, shut up!”  Rolling her eyes, Sojourner puts her phone on ‘Do not disturb’ when she hears the door open. Turning around, she apologizes, “Oh, sorry. We’re actually clos-” She loses her train of thought as the 10 foot moth ducks through the door and saunters in, a dark gray owl in a fedora and trenchcoat follows in after. 

“Hola, baby. ¿Cómo estás?” Valentino leers down at her. Sojourner stares back, stunned. “And don’t play dumb with me. I heard you tell Voxy that you hope his tall…pervert, was it? Shoots his things up again.” He crosses his arms and smirks.

Quickly shaking off her shock, the bear regains her bearings, ‘Danger times two.’ “We’re closed, gentlemen.” Sojourner says firmly with an empty smile. “I’m afraid I’ll have to ask you to leave.” She pushes between the two men and walks to the door, “The exit is this way.” Holding it open for them, Sojourner locks eyes with Valentino. ‘ Keep calm, no sudden movements.’ “Have a nice afternoon.” 

‘Holy shit, this little bitch is bold.’ Travis gasps, eying Valentino cautiously. He gets nervous as the overlord’s smile tightens.

The moth’s eye twitches, “Heh, heh, is that any way to treat a customer?” He purrs, regaining his composure. “Don’t be so mean to me.” Valentino juts his bottom lip out in a pout. “I’ve come all this way just to see you, mi osita amor.” He leans down to the little sailor’s eye level, way too close for comfort. “I’ve missed that cute face so much. I wanted to see if you are interested in working with me.” The moth coos in baby talk. 

“If you have an item in need of repair, you can schedule an appointment on my website or via phone during business hours. Unfortunately, I’m closing early today.” Sojourner retorts, professionally. ‘Stay near exit. Prepare to run.’   “I apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused, please have a nice day.” Holding the door open wider, her face gives nothing away. ‘He might have a gun.’

The pimp’s smile finally drops, “You really have no idea who you’re talking to, do you?” He hisses, insulted by her dismissal. “Do you have any idea who you’re fucking with? ”

“There is a customer form that you can fill out that will provide all the necessary information.” ‘He has a long reach times two, avoid close combat.’ Sojourner blinks calmly at him. “There’s even an option for Spanish.” Valentino unfolds his arms and pushes his coat-like wings behind him. ‘Watch his shoulders, get ready to dodge.’

“Oh, shit.” Travis whispers, taking a step away from his boss. “Fuuuuck…”

Snarling, the overlord swings his top left backhand to Sojourner’s face. She ducks out of the way and his wrist cracks against the rim of the door, fracturing the joint. Screaming out in pain, Valentino hunches against the doorframe, blocking the exit. Reaching into Hot Mic, the electrician pulls out an eight pound sledgehammer and swings at the moth’s hip, his second pair of hands catch it and the two wrestle over it. Travis watches in alarm, looking for an opening.

Thankfully, Sojourner yanks her tool free and swings it overhead, barely missing Valentino as he narrowly side-steps out of the way. The metal head cracks the tiled floor with the downward force. Growling, Travis makes a lunge for her hammer. She swings it upwards and nails him in the chest, breaking his collarbone and several ribs, sending him to the floor, unconscious. Long arms snatch Sojourner from behind and launch her over the counter, slamming her against the wall, the drywall cracks as she lands on her knees. 

Fighting to get air back into her lungs, Sojourner shakily stands up to hear the click of a gun. Ducking a second too late, searing hot pain explodes in her left bicep. Dropping the sledgehammer, she hisses in pain, the bullet has shot through her arm. Biting back a scream, she braces herself behind the counter for cover, looking between the shelves for a weapon. ‘Find means of egress!’

“¡Sal aquí, pequeña perra!” The lust overlord spits, red drool leaks from his mouth. “I’ll fucking kill you, pendeja!” Ping! A bright pang of metal rings out and a small object rolls to Valentino’s feet. “¿Qué carajo?” His red eyes widen at the realization, “OH, FU-” A deafening blast with a blinding white light shakes the room. Valentino’s blood-curdling scream blends in with explosion. Sojourner seizes the opportunity to escape and scrambles for the door, she grabs the handle, but it doesn’t turn. She forgot it’s locked.

“Shit! SHIT!” Sojourner panics, taking a step back. ‘No, no, NO!’ . Reaching into Hot Mic, the injured sailor pulls out a crowbar and wedges it in the doorframe, biting through the pain. The heavy metal door creaks, but doesn’t give, the tool is jammed. “FUCK!” Sojourner swears, wiggling the crowbar to free it. A crushing grip snatches her injured arm and yanks her backwards onto the counter. She punches blindly, but another hand catches her wrist and slams her down to the hard surface, popping her right shoulder out of its socket. 

******************************************************** 

TW AHEAD! SCROLL DOWN TO ****** TO SKIP

 

Screaming out in agony, Sojourner tries to free herself as she’s forced to lie on her back. The hands move from her injured arms and pull her legs apart, sliding her forward until she meets the overlord’s hips. Horror fills the bear’s eyes as Valentino’s half-burned face hovers over her. 

A third hand grips her face as the tall overlord leans down, “The last thing you’re going to feel wheeze, is me fucking you before I rip. you. apart!” The stench of burned flesh chokes Sojourner as she tries to yank her head free. Her gunshot arm flies up and claws the burned man’s face, tearing chunks of charred skin off his jaw. Her boot just misses catching his hip to kick him away.

Valentino is unfazed, the adrenaline from the flashbang is too high for him to feel any pain. Letting out a crazed laugh, he slams his forearm with the broken wrist down on the small bear’s windpipe, instantly choking her. 

His second pair of hands grip the collar of Sojourner’s green coveralls and rips them down the middle, destroying the zipper. The clothing catches on the buckle of Hot Mic’s belt, the tool pouch snarls angrily as it tries to turn and bite their attacker. “The fuck is this thing?” The overlord questions, making quick work of the buckle and chucking the little beast behind him. 

Hot Mic lands on Travis’s head and instantly latches on, biting and ripping flesh off his face. The owl sinner screams and rolls, feebly trying to get the tool pouch off him. “Shut that fucking thing up!” Valentino orders as he turns back to his struggling victim. He watches in amusement as Sojourner fights to breathe and push his arm off her neck.  A sadistic smile stretches across his burnt face, “Así es mi amor, lucha conmigo.” He huffs, getting aroused by her desperation. “I love how you still fight.” Drool drips off his chin as he pants excitedly.  Reaching down between them, Valentino pushes his hand up Sojourner’s shirt, petting her soft, brown fur, “I was gonna be nice and drug you, but I want you to remember everything!” He drags his slippery, wet tongue up her neck and jaw, laughing hotly in her ear.

‘Get off me, GET OFF ME!’ Sojourner’s vision is fading from lack of oxygen. She can’t get enough strength or leverage to push the giant moth off of her. Klink, ting. The sound of a belt loosening makes her freeze. ‘No.’ Zzzzzzzzzrp! A zipper slides down. Panic rockets in her chest. ‘NO!’  She feels his hands on her breasts before sliding down to her hips. The in-seam of her leggings are pulled taut, the fabric about to be ripped apart. ‘I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!’

 

*******************************************************************************

Her mind goes blank. An explosion of heat erupts from Sojourner’s chest before a deafening roar of wind consumes her. Everything goes dark.

“-jo! soJO! SOJOURNER!” Someone is calling her name, shaking her shoulder. “MAMI, PLEASE WAKE UP!” Mismatched eyes snap open as Sojourner bolts upright. Breathing fast, she looks around wildly and scoots back in a panic. “Back up! BACK UP! Give her space!” Toner orders, holding his crew back. “¡Mami, soy yo. Soy Toner!” The painter calls gently, “Mira, soy tu amigo.” He offers his hand to the disoriented woman, “Somos amigos.” he repeats, waiting for her to respond.

The black bear’s heart slams in her chest as she studies Toner’s face, her senses slowly return to her. “T- Toner?” She croaks, her throat is raw and tastes like…exhaust? Looking around her again, she’s sitting on the floor of a destroyed building. Spare parts and tools are strewn everywhere and the walls that still stood are black with smoke damage, the rest are rubble. “Wh-where am…I?” What the hell happened here? Did a bomb go off? 

Toner gives his painters a wary look before answering, “Mami, this is your house.”

What?

Notes:

Sojourner is alright, her clothes are intact for the most part, but her home. Gone.
Despite the horrific actions that took place, I am extremely proud of the fight sequence. DnD dice baby.

Chapter 60: Hard Facts

Summary:

Sojourner is in shock from Valentino's attack, but who can blame her? Toner found her unconscious in the rubbled remains of her home. What happened? Will she get answers?

Notes:

Yo, yo, yoooo! Thank you so much making it this far! Your comments and interactions always light a fire under my tail and I'm able to crank out chapters at a time!

Date: March 20, 2026

Age: 7 years in Hell

Location: Eggy and Toner’s very humble abode

Weather: Nice, I suppose

Current Conditions: Houston, we’re in shock.

The past 48 hours have been…yeah. Sojourner sits with Capt. Tailhook on her lap, staring at the TV. The not-at-all turned on, TV. Nothing must be the hot topic because that’s mostly what the shell-shocked bear has been watching, doing, and most of all, saying. To be fair, most wouldn’t have much to say if they woke up confused in tattered clothing in the middle of the rubbled remains of their shop and 60% of their house.

Toner and Eggy watch their friend from the kitchen table and sip their coffees, sharing the same worried look. Glittery pink nails nervously tap the laminated surface before a warm skeleton hand glides over and squeezes them gently. Eggy sighs deeply, she damn near fainted when Toner carried Sojourner in two nights ago. It looked like the bear had been thrown into a paper shredder; her clothes were in rags, especially near the ends of her limbs. What the fuck happened? Eggy has no idea, neither does her husband, and apparently neither does Sojourner!

They had called Penny to come look her over, Russell came along due to the army medic passing the word. To everyone’s surprise, Sojourner had no physical injuries despite the state of her appearance. It was obvious to everyone in the apartment that the sailor was in an advanced state of shock. Penny advised Eggy and Toner to keep a constant eye on her and make a log of any new strange behaviors. 

When Russell went to give Sojourner a hug goodnight, her screaming startled everyone. Her panicked state only worsened when Toner tried to help. The men had to step out before Penny and Eggy could get Sojourner to fall asleep. From that reaction, Penny deduced that Sojourner was in shock from someone attacking her very recently. Unfortunately, until the sailor is able to speak, her loved ones can only guess what happened.

‘Who would want to target Sojo?’ The chef has been racking her brain for answers all night. As far as she knows, Honey Bear has no enemies. Hell, the girl even managed to charm a mob family of loan sharks and got Eggy to become their go-to dessert confectioner for events and parties. Toner is commissioned to paint a fuckin’ wedding portrait for them! 

It seems everything Sojourner touches turns to gold, and she doesn’t ask for much in return; just good friends and a genuine thank you. For hell’s sake, when Eggy asked for Sojourner’s help, not only did she get a kitchen that was built to last, she got a husband too!

“Breathe, suca.” Toner whispers, rubbing his wife’s hand with his thumb, “You’re going to make yourself brittle again.”

Eggy rubs her tired, rock-candy eyes, “I just don’t understand.” She groans, “Who would want to hurt her? Who?” Her hand lands heavily on the table with a loud THUNK! Making Sojourner jump, Tailhook hops off her lap at the disturbance, his owner didn’t seem to notice. Sucking a sharp breath, Eggy apologizes, “Sorry, Cocoa Kiss!” She whispers loudly with a tense grimace. 

That’s another thing that’s changed: Sojourner has been extremely jumpy since coming here. Anything louder than a clap has her panting. She wants to be near a window or a door at all times, always wearing Hot Mic even in her sleep, but the worst part by far is that she flinches whenever Toner gets close. 

The first time it happened, the painter only touched her shoulder and she reeled back to strike him before she caught herself. It was almost as if it was a reflex, Sojourner was more shocked than anyone and sat in the corner for four hours repeatedly saying, “Why did I do that? It’s Toner, why did I do that?”

Sojourner pets her leg and perks up, looking around for her cat. “Captain? Where’d you go?” She asks, scanning the room. “I swear he was just here.” The tired bear mutters. Looking at her friends, her eyebrow raises in confusion, “What’s wrong?” Puzzled by their strained expressions. 

“Mami, you sure you don’t remember anything before the explosion?” Toner asks, cautiously. He’s asked her a dozen times before, but maybe a dozen and one might yield different results. 

Sojourner smiles sadly, “I’m sorry, Tones. I really, really don’t know. I know I came home early that day because I wasn’t feeling too good. I was in the front closing up shop and then…” Her heart speeds up, her body tenses as she suddenly feels threatened. 

Shaking her head, Sojourner dismisses the feeling, “I must’ve spooked myself or something, I just know I was tense.” She starts pulling at her front braid, staring straight ahead, “Then it got really hot out of nowhere and a loud noise happened. Next thing I know, you’re waking me up.”

Toner sighs, the same story as before. His flames simmer to a low bluish-yellow at the base of his skull; blowing out a disappointed breath, the painter rests his chin on his hand as he leans on the kitchen table. His wife brings his hand to her plump, glossy lips and plants a gentle kiss on his knuckles, he smiles at her. 

Don’t stop, get it, get it! Lemme talk to ya- Beep

“Hello? Dog’s Day works…um… hang on.” Sojourner struggles to remember her business’s name. “De-Devil Dog’s Mechanisms… shoot, sorry.” She grabs her temples, trying to remember, “Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electrical Repairs! This is Sojourner speaking, how may I help you?”

Carmilla sits at her desk shocked at the clumsy greeting, that didn’t sound like the craftswoman she knows at all. “Sojourner? It’s Carmilla. Carmilla Carmine.”

Why does that name sound familiar? Sojourner knows who this is, but is drawing the largest blank at the worst possible time. “Uuum, y-yes! Hello, Ms. Carmine, what can I do for you?” Sojourner answers awkwardly. ‘I know this woman, I have a special name for her!’

The weapons dealer looks at the phone confused, Ms. Carmine? Sojourner has never called her that once in the two years they’ve known each other. Something is wrong. “I wanted to check to see how you were doing after your episode two days ago. The girls have tried texting you, but you have been sending confusing messages.”

“I saw you two days ago?” Sojourner asks, surprised. “Will you please tell me what I was doing? I’m having a hard time remembering some things.”

The ballerina sits up at her desk, “You can’t remember? ¿Por que?” She asks, her concern builds.

“Porque mi casa explotó y- ¡Señora!” Sojourner exclaims, finally remembering the woman. “¡Ahora lo recuerdo, tu nombre es Señora!” Relieved that her memory finally caught up, Sojourner flops back on the couch with a bright smile. “¿Como estás?” She asks cheerfully.

Carmilla swears she has whiplash from this conversation, did Sojourner just say her house exploded ? No, she needs to have this talk in person. “Es-estoy bien, gracias. Sojourner, are you available right now? There are some pressing matters I need to discuss with you.”

The bear’s heart drops into her stomach, Señora sounds serious. “Yes, I can come. I’ll be there in about 20 minutes.” The two women bid goodbye and hang up. Sojourner stands and pulls on her green chucks, her tan boots were destroyed when Toner found her.

Eggy walks up to Sojourner while Toner hangs back, “Sweetie, I don’t think you’re okay to go anywhere right now. You’re still recovering and ya barely slept all the whole time you’ve been here.”

Adjusting Hot Mic on her hips, Sojourner looks up to her friends, “I know I’ve been out of it guys, but maybe Señora can help jog my memory of what happened two days ago. Apparently, I was with her too.”

“Maybe, we should come with you.” Toner suggests urgently, “I don’t like the idea of you going by yourself right now.”

Sojourner looks at him sadly, “Normally, I’d totally agree with you. But I don’t know how Señora would feel if I started bringing people by without her permission.”

“All the more reason for us to come with you!” Eggy argues, “If you’re in danger then-”

The sailor gently shakes her head, “It’s not about her being dangerous, I’m not in danger. I know how much she values her safety and especially Odette’s and Clara’s. Just like you two do with me. If I brought my friends for ‘safety’ that would tell her that I don’t trust her, and that’s not true. I trust her very much.” Sojourner grabs Eggy’s hands and looks between her and Toner. “And right now, I need you two to trust me. I will come back with answers, I swear.” Her eyes plead with Toner and Eggy. 

The married couple look at each other and sigh, “You call when you arrive, you call when you leave.” Toner states firmly, crossing his arms. “We’re trusting you, Mami.”

Sojourner walks up to Toner and hesitates before wrapping her arms around his middle, squeezing him in a tight hug. “Thank you.” She whispers against his shoulder.

Cautiously, Toner slowly wraps his arms around his friend and hugs her back, “Nosotras te amamos.” Kissing the top of her braids.

“A mi tambien.” Sojourner replies back.

Toner and Eggy watch from their balcony as Sojourner drives away. Their stress is at an all time high, neither of them could handle having anything happen to her. But, they trust her. 

______________

1237, Carmine Towers, Carmilla Carmine’s Private Office

I made it just fine. I’m heading into the meeting. Send. 

Thanks for letting us know, call us if there’s anything wrong.

Will do, love y’all

Love ya

Putting her phone in her jacket pocket, Sojourner exhales nervously for the fourth time. The elevator doors open, allowing her to tentatively step off into the pristine lobby. She’s so nervous, what could Señora want to talk about that made her sound so serious? ‘No sense in stalling, just rip the band-aid off.’ Sojourner sighs and knocks firmly on the door.

A woman in white shorts and a black turtleneck crop top opens, “Sojourner!!” Clara exclaims and pulls the small bear into a tight hug. Immediate internal panic spikes in the sailor as she stiffens up from the unexpected contact.

Odette opens the door further and pulls her sister off, lifting Sojourner’s face to study her eyes. “Have you been getting any headaches lately? Trouble focusing?” The scientist shines a light into her friend’s eyes, watching her pupils. “Any ringing in your ears?”

“N-no.” Sojourner answers through squished cheeks. Her hands tightly grip her jacket as a means to calm herself. ‘It’s Odette and Clara, they’re your friends. You’re safe.’

“Girls, let her come in and get settled first.” Their mother calls from the office. “Por favor adelante, Sojourner.” Carmilla calls in pleasantly. She’s sitting on the couch and putting the last few touches on the snacks, coffee, and tea that sit on the coffee table.

‘She doesn’t look upset’ Sojourner looks around the office. ‘20x25x35, 20 stories up, main egress are the double doors behind me.’  

Carmilla watches Sojourner’s behavior, ‘Is she scanning the area?’ The arms dealer recognizes the signs, she does each time she meets with a prospective client at a different location. The habit has saved her and her daughters many times in the past, but Sojourner comes here frequently, why now?

The overlord decides to use a gentle approach, the electrician is clearly on high alert and she can’t risk triggering her in such a small space. She shifts her seat so Sojourner can sit closest to the exit, hopefully that will help calm her down.

“Siéntate, mija.” Carmilla says gently, tapping the seat beside her. Sojourner sits down stiffly, almost at attention. Her shoulders are square and her back is straight, hands in tightly balled fists on her knees.

Clara and Odette glance warily at each other, what’s wrong with Sojo? Is she scared of something?

“Sojo, it’s okay, you’re not in trouble. Relax.” Clara says softly. 

“Are you worried about the hangar?” Odette adjusts her glasses, “It’s completely fine, took less than an hour to clean up.”

Sojourner looks between the three women, “The hangar? What happened in the hang- GASP! ” Dark brown claws fly to her face. “Oh my god, I destroyed the hangar.” She whispers breathlessly.

“No, no, you didn’t.” Carmilla counters, “You had a panic attack and your residual power fluctuated.” She scoots closer and places a hand on the bear’s shoulder. “That’s what we wanted to talk to you about today: your abilities.”

Sojourner struggles to get her breathing steady, “You mean my magnetism?” She starts to tug at her front braid. “I don’t really know how it works, it just kicks in when I’m in a fight or stressed out.”

Odette takes out a tablet and starts typing notes, “Hmmm, it could be activated by the amygdala.” She mutters. 

“Can you repel and attract?” Carmilla asks, pouring a cup of peppermint tea. “Do you know which is stronger?” She hands Sojourner the tea. “Bebe.”

Taking a sip, Sojourner enjoys the soothing mint run down her throat, “Repel is definitely stronger. The first time it happened…” She trails off. The first time it happened, Gunny triggered her by accident when he teased her about not drinking. “It caught me by surprise, I pushed Gunny back because he upset me.” She takes another sip, “Then right after, I had a panic attack. Just a regular one.”

“Seems like it kicks in when your cortisol spikes.” Clara observes as she bites into a finger sandwich. “You get upset or angry and you push things away.” She says between bites. “Very effective defense mechanism. Would that be fight or flight?”

“It would be a fawn response.” A hissing voice answers. Zestial appears by Sojourner’s side and and bows slightly over her, “Give you good ev-“

The bear sees the tall, looming figure with glowing eyes hovering right on top of her. Suddenly, she can’t breathe, “Get OFF ME!” Sojourner shrieks, leaping from her seat and running to the opposite side of the office, the group jumps from the sudden outburst. 

A glowing hot soldering iron is pulled from Hot Mic and pointed at the tall, slender man, “I’ll blind you! I’ll kill you!”   The bear snarls. Her green and red pupils are blown out into black orbs, drool drips from her razor sharp teeth as deep, hefty breaths heave from her chest. Arcing currents leap between the wires in her hair. She looks like a wild beast backed into a corner.

Zestial takes a step back slowly, what the hell is happening? His springtime has never shown an ounce of fear of him since the day he happened upon her in the tailor shop. He studies her closely and quickly realizes that Sojourner isn’t really seeing him; she’s picturing someone else.

“Do not move.” Carmilla whispers quietly. Slowly picking a teacup, she taps a spoon against the rim. Ting, ting, ting, ting~ “Sojourner, mira aquí.” The tapping continues. “¡Mija, mira aquí!” The threatened bear twitches, her eyes dart to Carmilla, then back to Zestial.

‘Need to leave! Arms injured, can’t breathe! FIGHT BACK!’ Ting, ting, ting~ ‘What is that noise?’ The sharp tapping gets louder. There was no tapping when it happened, what’s that noise? “¡Mira aquí!” A woman’s voice. That can’t be right, there’s a man, two men, she is the only female there. “Sojourner!” Señora?

Blurry, tunnel vision clears as Sojourner blinks her eyes, she sees a green spider. “Mr. Zestial?” Her arm is tired, the electrician looks at the soldering stretched out in front of her. “What the-?” She lowers her arm and shuts off her tool, “Wh-why am I…?” Hic. Tears pour from her mismatched eyes. “Why am I scared of you?” Sojourner looks at her elder, her dear friend, “You’d never hurt me.” Her voice cracks as she slides down the wall to the floor, “You would never do that to me.” She sobs, burying her face in her hands.

“Everyone, please give us some privacy.” Carmilla says quietly, walking over to the weeping woman. Zestial escorts Odette and Clara out of the office and closes the double doors behind them. “Mija,” The mother kneels down in front of Sojourner, “Who did it?”

The sailor lifts her head up, panting, “Valentino.” She chokes out.

Notes:

So, Sojo has some issues, some very understandable issues. Like a fear of tall men.

Chapter 61: Making Moves

Summary:

Eggy and Toner show up for Sojourner in her time of need, what can they do to ensure her safety now that she's on the Vee's radar?

Notes:

Second update of the week! We're going through a heavy time in the story but I promise it will lighten up....eventually. No promises.

 

Date: March 20, 2026

Age: Dead for 11 Years

Location: Carmine Towers

Weather: Still nice

Current Conditions: Freaking out a little bit ngl

“I don’t think I’ve evah been to this part of town.” Eggy whispers as she grips her husband’s arm tightly. 

Toner tightly nods, he looks at his reflection in the mirrored elevator door, his calming blue flames are a hot red with a yellow base. He’s sorta freaking out right now, not that many could blame him. Most wouldn’t exactly be doing cartwheels when an overlord’s car comes to your house and asks for you and your wife's immediate audience.

“Art thou fearful?” Zestial asks, looking down at the painter with an amused smile. Toner eye sockets widen and he quickly shakes his head; unfortunately, his flames flicker black for a moment, giving him away. The old overlord chuckles, “Fear not, for thou art safe on these grounds. Come.” He leads the couple to the double doors and knocks softly.

Clara opens the doors and smiles up at Zestial. “She’s calm now.” The spider chitters happily and walks in. 

Odette walks up beside her sister, “Welcome, please come this way.” Guiding Eggy and Toner into the office. It’s the nicest office they’ve ever seen, the windows, the desk, the couch…Sojourner! 

They rush over to their friend, halting only when Carmilla holds up a large hand. “Shh! Despacio.” The arms dealer instructs quietly. When Toner and Eggy relaxed their posture, she waves them closer. Sojourner sits leaning her elbows on her knees with her face in her hands. Her long multicolored braids hang loose all around her head as her jacket sits on her shoulders. The small bear looks wrecked .

Eggy kneels on the ground beside Sojourner, “Honey Bear.” She quietly calls out, keeping her hands to herself. Taking a deep inhale, the sailor lifts her head. The dark brown fur on her face is damp from tears as dark circles sit underneath dim glowing eyes. Blinking in the harsh, bright light, Sojourner straightens up and rubs her eyes.

“Yo.” She says groggily. “Thanks for coming.” Her head is killing her, a wave pulses painfully behind her eyes and over the top of her cranium. “I need to tell y’all some things you’ll need to sit down for.”

“¿Mami, qué pasa?” Toner asks as Carmilla switches seats with him. “Gracias, Señora.” He nods politely to Carmilla before sitting down. Eggy sits on the opposite side of her friend, anxiously waiting.

Sojourner tells the two everything. The panic attack in the hangar, her moving the tank, and as much as she could stomach of Valentino’s assault. “He didn’t do it.” She murmurs, “My leggings were still intact where it mattered when you found me, Toner.” Sojourner grips the front of her shirt tightly. “I blocked it all out, that’s why I couldn’t remember what happened before the explosion. Which wasn’t really an explosion at all.”

Eggy fights to keep her composure, when she gets a hold of that moth bastard, she’s going to pour melted sugar on him. Blinking away tears, “Wh- what ahem what was it?” Her Jersey accent wavers violently.

“It was me.” Sojourner says bluntly. “My abilities must’ve kicked into the next level and I went nuclear or something.” She starts fiddling with a braid. “It explains why it suddenly got so hot and the loud noise. But I don’t know what exactly I did, because, y’know, blacked out. Which leads me to the next subject.”

Toner’s head is reeling, his flames fluctuate between dark red and black flames, “There’s more?!” He asks incredulously.

Sojourner nods, “It’s not safe that I live with y’all.” Immediately, Toner and Eggy start protesting.

“What are you talkin’ about? Of course ya are! Ya couldn’t be safe-ah anywhere else!” Eggy exclaims, hurt written all over her blue fondant face. 

“There’s strength in numbers, Sojo!” Toner argues. “We can keep you safe from Valentino!”

“He’s an overlord, Tones!” Sojourner counters, “He’s one of the Vee’s! And I already pissed off the one who can fuckin’ hypnotize people by puking on him! It was own his fuckin’ fault, mind you, but still! Do you think he fuckin’ cares?” She waits for him to come up with an argument, “Now that I fucked up and burned another one, there will be retaliation! They will come after me and by association come after you two!”

Sojourner takes his hands, “And it’s not just them that’s dangerous, I’m dangerous too!” She looks back to Eggy, “Look what I did to my own home and I don’t even know how I did that! All I know is that it takes me getting worked up and BOOM! ” Her friends look away from her, knowing she’s right. “It’s too dangerous for all of us to stay together. I have to go live somewhere else.” Sojourner takes one of Eggy’s hands and interlaces their fingers.

Simple syrup tears rundown the chef’s face, “But where? Will she stay here with you?” She looks at Carmilla, who shakes her head solemnly.

“It would not be safe for any of us either.” The overlord confesses. “The access to weapons combined with her mental health and residual abilities prove too high of a risk.” She crosses her arms and looks away, “Her argument is too sound for me to counter.”

Toner flames flare angrily, “¿Y qué? ¿La arrojamos a los lobos?” He stands up, his hands balled tightly into fists, “We’ll take our chances, overlords, blackouts, or whatever else comes our way!”

“Our solution.” Odette interjects, “Should be arriving in 3, 2, 1.”

Knock, knock, knock

All heads turn towards the double doors as Clara pulls them open.

“Good afternoon, Carmilla, Zestial! Lovely to see you!” A staticky voice greets cheerfully. “May I come in?” Clara stands aside and waves her arm, narrowing her eyes at the tall, red deer. Eggy and Toner’s mouth drop, this is simply too much.

“Alastor, thank you for coming on such short notice.” Carmilla greets walking up to her fellow overlord, “Good to see, you alive and well.”

The smile on the Radio Demon tightens, “You mean that kitten scratch? Caught me by surprise more than anything.” His eye twitches as he turns to the rest of the room, his sight landing on a familiar face.

“Why, Sojourner! You look absolutely awful, darling!” He exclaims in curiosity. 

“Thanks, I feel like a million bucks.” She smiles dryly, already used to his humor. “Just rainbows and butterflies over here.”

“Good to know you’re in high spirits!” Alastor smiles with delight, “From what Carmilla told me, you’re interested in checking into the hotel! Is this correct?”

Sojourner heaves a heavy sigh, “Mm-hmm.” She confirms with a nod, “That’s correct.”

“Waita minute, ya mean the hotel that fought the angels? That hotel?” Eggy asks, her panic building. “Ya think she’ll be safe there? ” She stands up.

“Of course, madam! We live in the upper most part of uptown, overlooking all of Pentagram City.” Alastor spins his cane before planting it between his feet. “Most of our staff are seasoned warriors who can each hold their own against exorcists as I’m sure you’ve seen. And of course, me, The Radio Demon !” His handsome face slips into a more demonic form before returning to normal. “If anyone is foolish enough to attack our hotel, they will have to deal with me.”

“And His Majesty.” Zestial chimes in, smiling at the irritation that crosses Alastor’s face. “For the king has taken residence in thy abode, correct?”

Low feedback plays through the air, “Why yes, Zestial, that is correct.” Alastor answers through gritted teeth before regaining his composure, “And most importantly, we are much more equipped to handle any incidents that may occur due to high stress!” He eyeballs Sojourner who looks away.

Toner frowns at the smiling man, he’s super creepy, but he did take on Adam and survive. “¿Qué piensas, querida? He asks his wife who worriedly bites her thumb.

“It doesn’t really matter what either of us think, it’s Honey Bear’s decision.” She laments as she turns to Sojourner, “Cocoa Puff, is this what you want?”

The sailor sits in deep thought, mulling any other options, there are none that she can think of that will keep her and her loved ones safe, she stands up. “Yes.” She answers firmly, “I’ll go.”

Toner and Eggy nod and pull the small bear into a tight embrace, “We trust you, Mami.” Toner whispers, brushing her braids out of her face.

Carmilla perks up as Odette and Clara lay their heads on each of her shoulders. She plants a kiss on both their heads as she hugs them. Zestial chuffs happily beside them, enjoying the refreshing scene.

‘Ugh, sentiment.’ Alastor shudders, he taps his cane loudly. “Are you ready to go, my dear?” 

Sojourner peeks up from her group hug, “Oh, I need to grab my clothes and…”

“We’ll drop them off later tonight.” Eggy hushes, “Go get checked in.” She kisses her friend’s fuzzy cheek.

“And the Captain?” Sojourner asks, stepping away, still holding onto their hands.

Toner somehow rolls his eye sockets, “We got him. Vete ahora.” He shoos her off.

Following Alastor out, Sojourner turns and smiles for the first time in 53 hours, “I’ll see y’all later!” She waves goodbye to everyone, “I love you!” The door closes.

“Love ya!” Toner and Eggy echo back watching the double doors close. Sniff, sniff . Eggy wraps her arms around her husband and buries her face into his shoulder. Tears drip off Toner’s cheek, holding his wife with one arm and hiding his face with the other.

Carmilla’s heart turns heavy watching the couple grieve, but it’s nice to know the young woman she’s grown to be so fond of isn't alone.

At least there’s that.

Notes:

We going to the hotel bitches~! We made it, let's frickin' go~!

Chapter 62: Welcome Aboard!

Summary:

The hotel prepares for their new guest while Husk and Lucifer hold down the fort. Neither are too pleased that Alastor is bringing someone from Carmiila Carmine's to live with them, but they'll have to make do.

Notes:

Final update of the week my lovelies! Again, I truly appreciate your support in my story, I'm having so much fun writing this.

Date: March 20, 2026

Age: An Old Bartender

Location: Hazbin Hotel Front Desk/ Bar

Weather : The fuck does he give a shit bout weather?

Current Conditions: Bored, drinking, playing Solitaire 

Tick, tick, tick…

‘Fuck, it’s quiet.’ Husk thinks to himself as he shuffles his playing cards for a new game. He supposes he should enjoy it while it lasts since everyone is out for the moment. Boss announced that he was retrieving a new guest from Carmine tower to come stay here. ‘The fuck is he thinking? We just rebuilt this place!’ Husk grumbles to himself. He can’t even imagine what kind of psychopath Alastor is dragging here, but Husk can guarantee that they will cause  trouble.

The princess on the other hand was beyond excited for another guest. She made an impromptu group activity to go get party favors to welcome the newcomer. Husk volunteered to man the fort while they left on their ‘noble’ mission, Angel cut him the dirtiest look as Charlie pushed him out the door, cheering.  The bartender snorts, ‘I’ll make it up to you, legs.’ He promises as he adds a 2 to the ace of diamonds. His tall, tufted ears flick as footsteps come stomping down the steps.

“That fuckin’ bellhop!!” Lucifer snarls, stomping into the foyer, “What the fuck is he thinking bringing a sinner from Carmilla Carmine to my daughter’s doorstep?!” Red horns threaten to sprout from his forehead as flames leap from his razor sharp teeth. 

Husk simply nods in agreement, stacking another card. Good to know the king shares the same sentiment. Lucifer continues, “When they get here, I’m gonna lay the ground rules right when they walk in the door!”

“Sounds like a plan, sir.” The chimera mutters, completing a suit. 

Lucifer grins proudly, adjusting his hat, “Thank you, Hank! It is a good plan isn’t it?”

“My name is Husk.” He corrects, knowing the angel isn’t listening.

“If I scare the shit out of them on arrival, Charlie won’t have anything to worry about and can work her wonderful magic!” Lucifer clasps his hands together lovingly, beaming at the thought of his baby girl. The sound of tires pull up and two car doors close, Alastor’s signature voice is talking about something enthusiastically.

The doors open to the radio host leading the way in, “-my radio tower operates on components all hailing from the early 1900’s-” His tall frame obstructs the stranger.

‘Showtime.’ Lucifer puffs out his chest and marches towards the two. 

Alastor sees the king coming and sneers, “Ah, good evening, Your Ma- OOF! ” Lucifer shoves the deer demon out of the way and points up to lecture...no one. There’s no one there, he looks down.

A petite black bear sinner with mismatched eyes and multicolored braids looks up in surprise at him. Husk leans over to get a better look, this is not what he was expecting at all.

Alastor fixes his coat and huffs, “How barbaric!” He growls at the short king, “Is that any way to treat a fellow guest, Sire?” Venom drips off the last word.

Husk takes a swig out of his endless bottle and waits for the next move. The woman holds up her hand, “Hello.” She greets politely. “How are you?”

Lucifer is not prepared for this, he was ready for a gun toting, sword swinging, nutjob; not Sister Bear from the Berenstain Bears. Lowering his hand to the rim of his hat, “Hello, Miss, welcome to the…uh, Hazbin Hotel.” He tips the large white hat to the new guest. “I’m doing great, th-thank you for asking.” Lucifer smiles, awkwardly.

Husk chuckles quietly, ‘Nice recovery.’ He takes another drink and settles in to watch.

Alastor walks up and places a hand on the stranger’s shoulder, she stiffens. “Sire, may I introduce Sojourner Knight? A highly skilled craftswoman and a very dear acquaintance of mine.” He gestures to the sailor with a flourish. “And my darling, this is His Majesty, King Lucifer Morningstar! Recently active after a lengthy hiatus.”

‘That was unnecessary.’ Husk eyelids lower in annoyance, ‘He always startin’ shit.’ He looks at Sojourner and notices how bright her eyes are; like literally, they’re glowing and getting increasingly brighter. She’s smiling and interacting, but her jaw is locked. ‘ She’s nervous.’

“How about I take you on a tour?” Lucifer suggests, offering his arm to Sojourner.

Alastor pushes the king away, “What utter nonsense! What kind of job is that for a king? As the host of the hotel, I’ll take her on a tour, wouldn’t that be nice, my dear?” He pulls Sojourner’s shoulder to his side, her eyes widen.

Standing at attention, Sojourner stares at the wall behind Lucifer. “Uh~.” Her voice wavers.

Lucifer smiles tightly, “What kind of king would I be if I didn’t take the time to make my subjects feel welcomed?” He asks through gritted teeth. He hooks his arm through Sojourner’s and pulls her from Alastor’s side to his, her face drops.

“Why don’t y’all get her an application?” Husk calls out from the bar, successfully getting the men’s attention. “One less thing for Princess to worry about when she gets home?” 

Alastor lights up, “What a marvelous idea, Husker! I’ll be back in a moment!” He melts into the shadows.

“Don’t bother, I’ll get it!” Lucifer rushes through a portal. Silence. 

Sojourner stands in the center of the room, trying to steady her breathing. Her shoulders rise and fall in quick pants.

“Take deeper breaths, you’re gonna pass out.” Husk instructs, pouring a glass of water. “You’re already in bad shape.” He places it down on the bar and taps the surface. 

Stiffly, she walks over and takes the glass with a shaking hand. “Thank you.” Downing half the glass in three gulps, Sojourner takes a deep breath, holds it for seven seconds and releases. The heel of her hand presses against her red eye as a grimace crosses her face.

Husk crosses his arms and gets a good look at her, heavy circles sit under her eyes despite the dark fur on her face. She presses her hands to the sides of her temples in an attempt to alleviate pressure. 

“Take your bun out.” Husk suggests, refilling her glass, “The weight is pulling on your scalp.” He fills a bowl full of peanuts and scoots them towards her. She dashes from the bar to about 10 feet away, leaving Husk terribly confused.

“Can you seal those away please?” Sojourner asks as she throws her shirt over her nose.

A long eyebrow raises, “What you hate the smell or somethin’?” He asks, dumping the peanuts back into the jar and closing it tight.

Sojourner hesitates to answer, “It’s complicated.” 

“You know that sinners don’t have allergies, right? These won’t hurt you.” Husk chuckles as he wipes down the bar.

Freeing her face, the bear looks off to the side, “Under usual circumstances, you’re correct. However, I have a…thing and it’s…” She trails off.

“I get it. Complicated.” The old bartender shrugs his shoulders with a smile. The younger sinner smiles back. “Sojourner, huh? That’s an old~ name, who had it first? Grandma or great grandma?”

Pulling her bun out, long dark blue, green, and red braids tumble down Sojourner’s back. They loosen apart as dark brown fingers comb through them, their owner sighs in relief. “Great grandma on my mom’s side.” She answers, hiding her yawn behind her elbow. “What about you? What’s your name?”

“Husk, nice to meet you, Sojourner.” Husk says, shuffling his playing cards in intricate patterns.

“Please, call me Sojo.” The sailor insists, watching the cards twist and flip in fascination. “That is so cool.” She whispers, sitting down on a barstool.

“Play a game?” The gambler asks, performing more card tricks.

“Sure, do you wanna play ‘Garbage’?” Sojourner scoots to the edge of her seat to get a better view of the cards.

Husk chuckles, “I haven’t played that game in decades. Whatchu know about ‘Garbage’?” He asks while dealing the cards.

The sailor smiles fondly, “One of my mentors taught me while I was stationed in Japan. He taught me all sorts of card games.” She organizes her hand in the required set up and plucks a card. She gets a run of five before it’s Husk’s turn.

‘That explains how she kept her shit together in front of the king.’ “Japan, huh?” The gambler gets a run of eight before it’s Sojourner’s turn again. “Marines?”

Shaking her head, “Navy, forward deployed.” She completes her set and they set up for a new round. Sojourner deals Husk 10 cards while she deals herself nine. “Those two are taking a long time to grab a single application.” She wonders aloud as Husk takes his turn.

“It’s on a computer. They don’t know how to work it.” Husk completes his set in one go and gathers the cards to shuffle again. Sojourner didn’t get a chance to go this round.

“Motherfu-” Sojourner miffs before registering the words. Realizing what Husk has done, she starts laughing, “Now why’d you do something like that?” She asks as Husk smirks to himself.

“Those two get so caught up in their piss race that they don’t see how bad it affects others.” Husk deals them each nine cards. “You don’t like being touched and here they go pullin’ on you like a toy between two children.” His ears lay back. “Pisses me off.”

The sailor goes quiet and looks off to the side, “Was it that obvious?” She asks, taking a sip of water.

Husk shakes his head, “No, kid. But I know the 1,000 yard stare when I see it.” The bear looks up at him. “Army, WWI.” The veteran confesses.

Sojourner grimaces, “Shit~, Pops!” She rests on her elbows, “WWI?” 

The old veteran nods and leans against the counter, mindlessly shuffling the deck. “Let’s see, I had to be about your age…"

______________

1713, Streets of Hell, Uptown

“Really dad, it’s okay, I’ll show you how to work the computer when I get back!” Charlie promises as she listens to her father’s frantic reply, “No, no! You didn’t let me down! In fact, I love that you and Alastor were working together to try and to get this done for me. Good job to both of you!” More talking that turns into arguing. “Okay, okay! It doesn’t matter who’s idea it was. Please stop fighting! STOP FIGHTING!” Silence. “Great! We’ll be home soon!” Charlie hangs up and sighs exhaustively, putting her phone in her pocket.

“Vaggie, are you sure this is enough?” She asks as she inspects the contents of her bag again.

The angel rolls her eye with a loving smile, “Yes, babe. We’re not throwing a rager for each new guest.” She chuckles, adjusting the two overflowing bags in her own hands.

“Why the fuck not? That seems like a perfect idea! A huge party for each new bloke is sure to bring more bitches in!” Cherri argues, eating snacks from her grocery bag.

Vaggie scowls at her, “Cherri, save some for the guest!” She barks, “You already ate a whole bag of chips.”

The bomber’s eye narrows, “Yeah, kale chips, they were fuckin’ gross!”

Baxter pushes his glasses back on his face, “If that is your sentiment then why did you continue eating them?” He asks curiously.

“Didn’t know they were kale until I saw the bag.” Cherri shrugs with a smile.

“I hate kale, it tastes like someone else’s earwax!” Niffty states happily as she runs ahead with a bag full of party poppers.

The group groans in disgust, except for one. Angel walks in the back silently, deep in thought.

“Angie, what gives? You’ve barely said shit for the past two days, what’s goin’ on?” Cherri whispers over her shoulder. “Ya didn’t even complain when Rapunzel over there dragged us to five different stores!”

Angel smiles tiredly at his best friend, “I’m cool, sugar tits, it’s just…”He trails off.

“Just what? You and Husk okay?” Cherri asks, slowing down to walk with him.

“No, no, me and my baby are good! Great even. It’s…” Angel chooses his words carefully, “Val got hurt.” He confesses quietly.

Cherri lights up, “That’s fucking great! Serves the fuckhead right for-”

Angel shakes his head, “Cherri, Val got hurt bad, I’m talkin’ bones broken, wings torn, half his face burned and clawed !” He remembers the horrific sight as Travis, who was barely breathing himself, dragged the two of them to the studio and collapsed on the floor. “It was like someone set off a bomb right in front of him. Travis had his fucking chest caved in!”

Cherri looks up at Angel stunned, “Fuckin’ hell, Ang…” She mutters, “Is he dead?”

The tall spider shudders, “Honestly, it'd be easier for him if he did.” He laments, “I don’t know who is dumb enough to take on Val, but I guess he got the last laugh cuz he allegedly blew them the fuck up.”

Cherri shrugs, “Well, at least they got a good few licks in before they died.” She comments.

“Yeah, no shit.” Angel laughs humorlessly. 

The group arrive at the gate and walk up the hill to their home. 

“Okay everyone, we don’t have a lot of time to set up before Alastor is home with our new guest.” Charlie says excitedly, “So Vaggie and Angel will hang the banner, while Cherri and I set up the table. Niffty and Baxter-”

“They’re here, hon.” Vaggie interrupts as she points to a muscle car with intricate blue, yellow, and green flames gradiently painted on the body. Tone-Death Paint Shop is stenciled on the sides.

Angel lets out a low whistle, “They got wheels!” He says as everyone circles the car to admire it. “1969 Pontiac?”

“1968 to be exact, amigo.” They all turn to the voice. Toner stands in the hotel entrance with a proud smile on his skeleton face.

Dropping her bags in excitement, Charlie runs over and grabs Toner’s hand. “Hi, I’m Charlie! Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!” She shakes his hand vigorously. “We are so happy you’re staying with us and-”

“It ain’t him, Princess.” Husk calls out as he walks to the door. “He’s not the new guest.”

Toner nods in agreement, “Si, I’m Mami’s friend. My wife and I came by to get her settled.”

“Candlelight, you gotta start using her name when ya talk to new people.” Eggy scolds, gently swatting Toner’s butt. “Hi everyone, I’m Eggy and this is my husband Tonah! We’re friends of Sojo’s.” The chef introduces herself with a friendly wave.

“Sojo?” Vaggie asks, looking at the couple, “Is that who’s staying here?”

Husk nods, “Her name’s Sojourner Knight. Nice kid.” 

Cherri laughs in disbelief. “Holy shit, Joey? Joey’s staying here now?” She puts her hand on her hip, “I’ve been wondering what she’s been up to!” She runs inside, “Joey! Where you at, girl?” Scanning the lobby as everyone else follows inside.

“Upstairs sleeping.” Toner answers as he wraps his arm around Eggy. “She’s been having a rough time lately.” He admits quietly.

Charlie clasps her hands to her chest. “Oh no, what happened?” She asks worriedly.

Eggy frowns and lays her head on Toner’s shoulder, “She…lost her home recently, completely destroyed. Also someone attacked her and it shook her up very badly.” She hugs her husband, “She scares easily now, so please, be patient with her?”

“Yes, of course!” Charlie nods, “She’ll be very safe here!” The princess promises. “She can take all the time she needs to get settle down.”

Toner smiles warmly at Charlie, “Gracias, princessa. Gato said the same thing.” He nods over to Husk who raises his bottle to him. “You guys seem really nice, it makes us feel loads better about all of this.”

“This is a very sudden shift for all of us.” Eggy admits, “Sorry if we seem a little helicopter-ish.”

“Sounds like you two love her a lot.” Angel comments as he places his bags down on the bar, “She can’t be all that bad if she has people like you fussin’ over her.”

“You’re too sweet.” Eggy smiles before perking up, “Oh, speakin’ of sweets,” She darts off to the kitchen and comes back with two large white boxes, Toner takes one, “A thank you from us for helping our Honey Bear!” Opening the boxes, a spread of exquisite desserts line the interior: cupcakes, tarts, cookies, macarons.

Angel jumps up, “Cannolis!!” He exclaims, snatching one from the box. Taking a bite, Angel Dust moans in delight, “Holy shit, I haven’t had a decent one of these in I don’t know how long.” He holds his treat out to Husk who takes a bite. The shell has a satisfying crunch and the sweet cream is thick and hearty. The chocolate is just bitter enough to offset the sugar, it’s delicious.

The hotel residents each take a dessert and are thoroughly satisfied with the taste, “Thank you, Eggy!” Charlie covers her mouthful as she chews her angel food cupcake, light blue icing sits on her black nose. “Do you have a bakery?”

“I do!” The confectioner boasts proudly, “ Good as Hell Bakery , located in the downtown junction above Heaven’s embassy.” She bumps Toner with her hip, “My hubby’s custom paint shop is down the street from me.”

Finishing off her cupcake, Charlie wipes the top of her nose and licks off the icing. “I’ll definitely see you again, these are delicious!”

The princess walks the couple to their car and waves goodbye when she notices Eggy tearing up. “Eggy, don’t worry, Sojo will be okay here and you two are free to visit anytime!” She lays her hand on the chef’s shoulder. “We have plenty of rooms if you two choose to check in too! No rush.”

Toner holds his wife’s hand, “You’ve got a pure soul princessa. A really good one, adios.”

With a sad smile on her face, Charlie waves goodbye as they drive off. “Toner, Eggy don’t you worry! I’ll make sure she has the best life here.”

And that’s a royal guarantee.

Notes:

Sojourner is now under the care and protection of the Hazbin Hotel! About time we finally get here, phew!

Chapter 63: Should've Stayed Away

Summary:

The Vees are dealing with the aftermath of Valentino's attack. The only thing they can't figure out is who was able to do the moth.

Notes:

This was an interesting chapter for sure. On one hand the Vees are horrible, terrible, violent people that got to where they are by exploiting and manipulating others but that doesn't mean they aren't capable of empathy and compassion. At least for each other.

Date: March 21, 2026

Age: Died in the 50’s (I assume)

Location: Vee Tower

Weather: Downpour all day

Current Condition: (Im)patiently waiting to hear what happened 

 

Vox’s left eye twitches violently as he stares at his lover texting away at his phone. He was beyond relieved that Val pulled through and that he and Velvette didn’t have to go through the grueling process of waiting for Val to regenerate. But for fuck’s sake, it’s been three days, when is Valentino going to say anything? Vox’s cell buzzes, it’s Velvette, Still nothing? He texts back, of course not ):<

“I don’t like when you two text about me and I’m not included” The moth mutters, tapping away at his phone.

Vox grits his teeth, irritated with this nonchalant attitude. “We wouldn’t have to text if you would just tell us what happened.” He says slowly.

Red eyes still glued to his phone, “Mmm, how does it feel to want?” Valentino retorts. A chair scoots back and falls to the floor, he lazily tilts his head over to Vox who is standing and heaving fuming breaths. Unimpressed, Valentino raises an eyebrow.

“Coffee.” The TV Demon seethes, “I’m going to get some.” He stomps out of their bedroom and slams the door. The loud noise makes Valentino jump so bad he drops his phone. 

Suddenly, it all comes rushing back: the deafening bang that made his eardrums bleed, the blinding light searing his already fucked up retinas. The agonizing blaze that torched his face, chest, legs, and arms. The moth’s heart starts slamming in his bandaged chest, he can’t breathe!

Pulling his knees up to his chest and wincing at the pain, Valentino begins to hyperventilate. “¡Pa-Papito!” He chokes out, remembering the claws that took off half his jaw. “Vox!” The intense heat and insane force that slammed him against the metal shielding of the window, crushing his spine. “VOX!” Valentino screams as tears pour from his wide red eyes.

Vox drops his signature ‘Fuck Alastor’ mug on the floor and sprints to bedroom, “Val? VAL!” Damn near kicking the door down, the overlord sees the moth huddled in on himself, panicking. “Val? Shhh, it’s okay, baby, I’m right here.” He whispers, kicking off his shoes and crawling over to his lover.

Valentino buries his face into Vox’s chest as frightened squeaks ring out in distress. Wrapping all four of his long arms around Vox’s body, he settles in his lap and cries. “Y-you slammed the door!” Valentino sobs, “¡No cierres la puerta de galpe!” He hugs Vox tighter as he cries.

Guilt immediately seizing him, Vox gently rubs Valentino’s back. “I’m so sorry, amor. I’m sorry I slammed the door, I didn’t mean it!” He apologizes profusely, kissing the moth’s forehead, “I’m so sorry I scared you, honest. Shhhh.” Vox feels terrible, he truly didn’t mean to trigger Valentino. He let his temper get the best of him and took it out on his boyfriend.

“I’m sorry I’ve been impatient with you.” Vox whispers against Val’s head before kissing him again. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Valentino sniffs as a fresh wave of tears falls and dampens Vox’s striped vest. “It’s okay, baby. It’s okay to cry.” Vox settles in and hugs Val tighter to his chest. 

After a half an hour or so passes, Valentino is fast asleep still tangled in Vox’s arms. Listening to his boyfriend’s soft breathing, Vox makes a call, “Lewis?”

“Ye-yes, sir.” The timid eel answers.

“Send me the GPS information of the limo and all the street cameras footage of where it went after 1300 on March 18th. Then cancel my meetings for the week.”

“Yes, Mr. Vox. Right away.” Ethan confirms, the sound of scuffling feet is heard in the background before Vox hangs up.

Sighing, the TV Demon leans back into the pillows and gently scratches Valentino’s shoulders. Whoever did this is going to fucking pay, he swears it. His screen lights up with an email and he projects it onto the television mounted on the wall. Vox watches the limo pull off from Carmine’s Tower and drive to a hole-in-the-wall shop near downtown. He flips to the camera across the street to get a better angle and huffs in annoyance as the metal window shield blocks his view.

Valentino and Travis walk in and the owl goes further into the shop while Val stands in front of the door. The moth’s tall frame blocked whoever walked over and opened the door for them. ‘Are they telling him to leave? Fuck, they’re brave…and stupid.’ He muses as he observes his boyfriend’s movements. 

Based on the position of where Vox can see Val’s bottom half, the overlord bends over with his arms crossed. ‘Who are you talking to Val?’ The man in question twitches in his sleep and Vox hushes him, rubbing soothing circles into his back. He is very mindful of how sensitive Val’s wings are and runs his blue-tipped fingers through the singed fluff that lines Val’s neck. His thumb traces over the healing scabs on Tino’s jaw as he continues to watch the footage. 

The door opens wider and Val stands back up and pushes back his wings, red eyes widen as Vox recognizes the movement, “Val, no…” he winces as Val breaks his wrist against the door and leans against it in pain. Vox watches stunned as Val and the stranger wrestle over, “Is that a fucking hammer?” He whispers in disbelief. The door closes and the overlord can no longer see what is happening, “Shit!” Vox hisses as he fast forwards and stops when a bright flash shines through the door.

“What the hell was that?” Velvette whispers, making Vox jump. He was so concentrated on the tape that he didn’t hear her come in. “The fuck was that bright light?” She climbs into the bed and settles underneath the covers, laying her head on Vox’s shoulder. Groggily, Val wraps an arm around Velvette’s waist and falls back asleep.

Shaking his head, Vox whispers, “I don’t know.” They both stifle their gasps when the glass on the door explodes outward and the metal window shield bulges suddenly, cracking the large window. The video glitches and cuts out with an error message blinking. Velvette and Vox sit stunned, “Did Val have a bomb explode on him?” Vox asks, fighting to keep his voice quiet.

“Did he fucking go after a suicide bomber? Who the fuck blows themselves up like that?” Velvette pulls out her phone and starts searching social media for any news of an explosion. Vox cycles through the cameras that were near the shop, all of them contain the same error message of corruption starting at the exact same time. “I think I got something.” Velvette tilts her phone so Vox can see. Headline: Beloved Repair Shop in Ruins after Freak Gas Leak! The article explained how an acclaimed local repair shop was destroyed after what people assumed was a gas leak explosion. The shop owner, Savannah Nicks is rumored to have died in the explosion. 

“Who the fuck is Savannah Nicks?” Velvette looks up her name in Sinstagram, “Do we know any Savannahs?” Vox is deep in thought before realization hits him.

“No. But we know a Sojourner Knight.” The TV Demon says through gritted teeth. It all makes sense, a repair shop, an odd sounding name, the fact that the owner was a woman. Vox seethes, “That fucking bitch!” He growls, Velvette shushes him and points to Valentino, who slightly twitches in his sleep.

The day of the ‘Lunch Incident’, Val had said that he met the small bear in the elevator and how she managed to outmaneuver him before he could get her name. Vox remembers how angry he was that Velvette made that video of him getting puked on and cussed out by the small bear go viral, utterly humiliating him. When Val said he wanted to hire the little vomit nozzle for a disgusting new series, he and Vox got into a nasty argument when Vox refused to fund his new project. Vox slept in the penthouse alone for a week before they decided to bury the hatchet and make up.

The fashionista looks up at him, perplexed, “Vox, be so fuckin’ for real, babe. D’ya really think that that Beanie Baby could do this much damage to a fuckin’ overlord?” She gestures to the state of their beloved friend and lover who continues to sleep soundly. “That little bitch barely breaks five feet on a good day, Val would have slaughtered her. Maybe there was someone else in the shop.” Velvette uses a false account to go to the Devil Dog’s homepage, “Ah, there we are, it was that big bastard right there.” Pointing to a German Shepherd’s photo, “He’s the one we look for.” She scours social media again while Vox watches.

“Here he is, Chester Pultzer, celebrated for his heroic acts during blah, blah, bl- oh.” Velvette brings her phone close to her face. “Nevermind.”

Leaning closer, “What? What is it?” Vox asks eagerly. “You found where he is?”

“No need to. He’s dead, he died three and a half years ago on E-day.” Velvette informs as she scrolls through Chester’s memorial page. Vox rolls his eyes and sighs. Great, back at square one.

“Oh shit…” Velvette breathes, “Well fuck me, I was wrong.” She scoffs as she continues reading.

Rubbing his tired eyes, Vox yawns. “About what? The mutt being dead?”

The fashion overlord shakes her head, “About Beanie Baby, turns out she can definitely take on Valentino.”

Instantly waking up, Vox’s eyes slide over to his friend, “How the fuck do you figure that?”

Turning the phone to the TV Demon, a picture shows the small woman sitting on top of an exorcist throwing haymakers. “Because she was fighting angels before it was cool.”

Notes:

Again, I find it disturbing how easily I was able to write how nurturing they are to each other. It is not unimaginable for them to cuddle after one has been hurt or wronged. It eerie to say the least

Chapter 64: Sea Legs

Summary:

Sojourner is finally in the hotel and the others eagerly await her appearance. Y'know once she wakes up.

Notes:

I've been studying after effects of a SA attack. I'll say I wasn't shocked but more so surprised that increased sleep walking was a result.

Date: March 22, 2026

Age: 208 years old

Location: Hazbin Hotel

Weather: Can’t decide whether it wants to be warm or cold, still a downpour 

Current Conditions: Eagerly waiting for the new guest to wake up. Like waiting for Sinsmas Day.

 

The first time Sojourner wakes up, it is to Capt. Tailhook leaping off her stomach to race to his automatic feeder for breakfast. “Oh, it’s 0730.” She mumbles before rolling over asleep. The next time Sojourner vaguely remembers waking up is when a door opens up and a soft voice whispers, “Guys, we all don’t need to be in here! Shoo!” The bear falls back asleep after that, she has no clue who that was and she doesn’t care.

______________________

Earlier, 1930, Parlour

“Babe, just let her sleep. Toner said she hadn’t been sleeping for almost three days, it makes sense if she sleeps for a long time.” Vaggie soothes as Charlie paces back and forth, biting her lip worriedly.

“But it’s been over 24 hours! We can at least bring her a little something to eat for when she wakes up, maybe a welcome note?” The princess suggests with her hands laced together, “Please~?” She bats her long lashes at her girlfriend.

The angel smiles and rolls her eye, how can she say no to a face that cute? “Alright. We can bring her some water, fruit, and crackers, nothing that will spoil right away.”

Charlie dances on her tiptoes gleefully, “And a welcome note?” She asks excitedly.

Laughing, Vaggie nods her head, “Just maybe no confetti, okay?” She lets out an Oof! as Charlie squeals and twirls her in a tight hug. “But after that, we let her wake up on her own.” Vaggie wheezes out, feeling Charlie nod excitedly against the top of her head. 

Planting a kiss on Vaggie’s forehead, Charlie squishes her girlfriend’s cheeks and says, “I’ll go get the glitter and glue!” Taking off before Vaggie can protest.

The ex-exorcist prepares a small tray of food and a water bottle to bring upstairs and patiently waits for Charlie to finish her poster of a welcome note. Vaggie opens her mouth to say something, but decides against it. Charlie seems so happy to be making it, what’s the harm?

The couple head back upstairs and approach their new guest’s door. Charlie gives three gentle knocks, “Sojo? It’s Charlie and Vaggie again. We’re just dropping off food.” The princess softly whispers as she opens the door. Stepping inside, Charlie tiptoes towards the bed to check on the sleeping bear, seeing the bump under the blankets rise and fall with gentle breathing, she sighs in relief knowing she’s still resting.

“Meow?” A cat pops up from behind the blanket bump. Capt. T.H. blinks his three eyes slowly at the visitor causing Charlie to gasp excitedly, “Ooooh Vaggie look! She has a kitty too!” She whisper-shouts. Vaggie shushes her, putting her finger to her lips. Rosy cheeks turn redder as Charlie clasps her hands over her mouth in embarrassment. 

Sojourner sits up straight in bed with a stern expression on her face. Charlie and Vaggie freeze, holding their breath at the sudden movement. Unblinking, the bear turns to her cat and studies him, “Did you finish your tax returns?” She asks the Captain. He purrs in response, giving his sinner a gentle headbutt on her chin. “Make…make sure to warm the microwave’s wig in the oven first.” She continues. Capt. Tailhook nuzzles her face affectionately. “I could fit you in my mouth, I bet.” She says to no one in particular.

“Meow.” The cat replies, slowly blinking at the sleep talker.

“Good man.” Sojourner nods and lays back down, immediately falling back into a deep sleep.

Charlie and Vaggie stare at the sailor then slowly lift their eyes to each other. Big mistake. They throw their hands over their mouths in a sad attempt at stifling their laughter. Running to the door, Charlie almost trips over Vaggie as she struggles to open the door, sending them into a deeper fit of giggles. 

Successfully making it into the hallway, the women collapse against the opposite wall and holler with laughter. Vaggie crawls over to Sojourner’s door and pulls it close before lying on the floor as another wave of tittering consumes her.

“Girls?” A confused voice asks down the hallway. “You two okay?” 

Wiping tears from her eyes, Charlie’s rosy cheeks begin to ache, “Hi Dad! We’re- PFFFFFFTTT! ” The girls fall out again into high pitched giggles. 

Lucifer lets out a snort, the atmosphere of his girls getting contagious. Chuckling, “What’s so funny?” The king asks as his own laughter builds.

Vaggie pushes her long hair out of the way as a long stream of tears runs down her beautiful face. “We- we were checking whew! We were checking on Sojo a-and she’s a sleep talker.” The young angel fans herself with her hand.

Now laughing himself, Lucifer smiles at his silly girls, “Oh? What did she say?”

Charlie and Vaggie can barely make it through the story without stopping to laugh again. Lucifer gets a pretty hearty giggle fit simply watching his daughter have such a good time.

Finally calming down, the King helps Charlie and Vaggie back to their feet. “It was just so unexpected.” Charlie sighs with a bright smile on her face, “I wonder if Sojo knows she does that? Would that be a weird conversation starter?” She asks her dad as she holds onto his hand.

“Hey, nice to meet you, do you know you sleep talk? Yeah, best save that for when you two are closer friends.” Lucifer smiles, giving Charlie’s hand a gentle squeeze. Sojourner’s bedroom door opens; the trio hold still as the bear stands in the doorway holding her cat out at arm’s length, green and red eyes wide open.

Walking up to Lucifer, Sojourner places the feline in his arms, “He knows too much.” She says while staring at the purring animal. Slowly backing up, Sojourner climbs back in bed and begins to softly snore.

The small group of three stare into the room and then look at each other. Big mistake. Lucifer almost chokes on his spit trying not to laugh, “Wh-what?” He wheezes as he slides down the wall, joining Charlie and Vaggie on the floor. “What was that?” He whispers and jerks his thumb to the closed bedroom door.

“We told you!” Charlie whispers, wiping more tears from her eyes. “She’s a sleep talker!” It takes a full minute for the three to calm down again.

Tugging at his collar to let some airflow in his clothes, Lucifer clears his throat, “In all seriousness though, we should check to see if she knows she’s a sleepwalker.”

The girlfriends nod in agreement, “I could call Toner and ask him if he knows anything.” Vaggie offers, taking in steadying breaths. 

“Meow.” Captain Tailhook says, settling into Lucifer’s lap. The king’s yellow eyes grow wide with affection as a loving smile stretches across his angelic face.

“Hewwo, tripod kitty!” He coos, “Aren’t you just da sweetest?” The Capt. looks up at the angel and slow blinks, making him guffaw. “I wuv you too! Captain?” Lucifer squints reading his collar, “Captain Tailhook.” He scratches under the cat’s chin while looking over him.

“That’s a unique name.” Charlie comments, letting Capt. smell her hand before petting him. “Wonder why Sojo picked that name. I like it, but still.”

“Well, I can keep him company until she wakes up.” Lucifer states, standing up with the cat. “Would you like to meet Kee Kee? She’s a pwetty kitty just wike you!” 

“Maow.” Captain Tailhook answers.

“Ha, ha! I love this guy!” Lucifer grins and walks back down the hallway.

“Wait, sir! You can’t just steal a resident’s pet!” Vaggie calls after him.

“I’m not stealin’ him, I’m just gonna give him a tour and show him Kee Kee!” Lucifer teases as he continues walking. Rolling their eyes, Charlie and Vaggie follow after him.

______________

0815, March 23, Sojo’s Room

Red and green eyes blink open, confused at the strange scenery. ‘Where am I?’ Pushing back the covers and pulling off her bonnet, Sojourner climbs out of the queen sized bed and looks around. Spotting the food tray and large glittery poster, the sailor walks over and starts to peel an orange. “Someone loves arts and crafts.” She chuckles as she reads the sign: Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, Sojo!

“That’s right, I’m at the hotel.” Sojourner gathers as she pops an orange slice into her mouth. Noticing the silence, she looks around the room. “Captain?” No response. “Hooky? Where are you, stinks?” She calls affectionately when she notices her bedroom door slightly cracked, “Oh, I hate that you know how to open doors, dude.” Sojourner mumbles before heading to the shower. Freshly showered and dressed in a comfy pair of gray yoga pants and a large mint hoodie, Sojourner pulls on her green chucks and heads downstairs.

__________

0842, Parlour

“Goodness, Pogo has a lot of people who love her! These look delicious!” Lucifer exclaims as he sets down the boxes of deli sandwiches from Silver Wing Deli . Another thank you that one of Sojourner’s friends, Russell, gifted the hotel. 

Even a doctor came by to see how the small bear was adjusting. The army medic offered to be an on-call medic for whatever the hotel might need. The residents all took her number and Lucifer gave her the go to call him for a quick portal over whenever she’s needed.

“I’m all for throwing a party for guests like GoGo if it means we get perks like this!” The short king chuckles, petting Capt. T.H. who lays comfortably on his shoulders.

“Is there really a point in throwing a welcome party if she’s technically been here for two days already?” Angel Dust asks as he hangs the banner.

“Of course, it’s important to make her feel safe and welcomed!” Charlie boasts happily. “This hotel is a new start for her and anyone else that comes through our doors.”

Cherri scoffs, “Yeah, if they don’t go straight into hibernation when they check in.” Popping a bubble with a smirk. “Seriously, is she even alive?”

“Yes, for the 10th time, she is alive.” Vaggie answers dryly, placing a pitcher of pink lemonade on the table. “We checked on her last night and she was still sleeping…sort of.”

“Whaddaya mean ‘sort of’?” Niffty asks, looking up at Vaggie.

Charlie bites her cheek, “Well, we kinda found out that Sojo is a… ahem sleepwalker?” She answers awkwardly.

“Oh shit, again? Where did I go?” Sojourner asks from the bottom step of the stairs. The room all turns to her, Charlie gasps excitedly and runs over.

“You’re awake! Hi!” The princess cheers happily, bouncing on her toes. “I’m Charlie! We’ve been waiting for you!”

A bit taken aback by the woman’s enthusiasm, Sojourner leans back slightly. “Wow, um, hi. Good morning, Charlie!” She greets back with a smile, craning her neck to meet the tall demon’s big, yellow eyes. “Sorry, I kept you waiting?” She continues, confused.

“Not at all! Come on!” Charlie grabs her hand and leads her to the group. “This is Vaggie, my girlfriend.” The one-eyed woman waves hi. Turning Sojourner towards Lucifer, “This my dad, Lucifer!” The angel smiles awkwardly, waving with a cold roasted chicken on rye sandwich.

The bear smiles, “Good to see you again, sir.” Eying her pet that purrs happily draped over the king’s neck, “Have you been behaving for Skipper, Hooky?”

Thick black eyebrows leap up in surprise, “Skipper?” Lucifer asks curiously, “Like the Captain of a boat?”

“Well, more like the commanding officer, but yes.” Sojourner confirms, her grin growing.

The king beams at nickname, this Berenstain Bear is really starting to grow on him. Charlie giggles and continues down the line. “This is Angel Dust, Baxter, Niffty, and I believe you and Cherri have already met!” 

Sojourner lights up at the familiar face, “Hey girl! What’s poppin’?” She asks, giving her friend a high five.

“Joey! It’s been forevah! The fuck you been up to?” The bomber replies with a toothy grin, “I’ve hangin’ out with these blokes since the hotel battle!”

Sojourner’s eyes widened at the remark, “Oh yeah, congratulations to all of you on your victory!” She says, looking at everyone. “Oh! Pentious lives here too, doesn’t he?” She asks excitedly, “Where is he?!” Locking eyes with Cherri. 

Immediately, Sojourner feels the mood of the room crash. Cherri crosses her arms tightly and shifts her weight to one side, “He…he didn’t make it, Jo.” She points behind Sojourner, making her turn around.

A beautiful portrait of her beloved friend sits in a memorial tribute on the wall behind her. Grief seizes Sojourner’s core like a boulder dropping into her stomach. “Oh…” She says quietly, walking up to the painting. 

Charlie watches the small bear worriedly. Gently placing a hand on her shoulder, she recoils when Sojourner flinches. “Sorry! I’m sorry!” The princess apologizes. 

The sailor shakes her head frantically, “It’s okay, I’ve been really jumpy lately, you were just trying to help!” She comforts Charlie and grabs her hand. “Thank you. And I’m so sorry for your loss.” Sojourner says to the group, “Wasn’t he awesome?” She smiles sadly.

Angel smiles back, “Total badass.” He agrees, he likes this chick. “But hey, he was your buddy too, right? Sorry for your loss.” The room murmurs in agreement. “Hey baby!” Angel calls to the bar, causing Husk to look up. “How about we get a round to remember Pen? Turns out Corduroy knew him too!” The spider points to the small bear.

“Oh, I can’t drink!” Sojourner counters quickly, stressed about her allergy to alcohol.

“Aw, come on, it’s not like you’re driving today. Everyone does some day drinking at some point in their life.” Angel scoffs and leads her over to the bar. The group clamors in agreement.

Scratching her head awkwardly, “I know, but I have this thing and it’s…”

“Complicated?” Husk finishes for her with a knowing look. Lucifer looks strangely between the two. What ‘thing’ could this sinner have that would prevent her from drinking? He decides he’ll ask later.

Dropping her hand to her side, Sojourner gives the bartender a grateful smile. “Exactly.” Husk nods and pours shots for everyone, handing Sojourner a shot glass of soda. They toast to their fallen friend then grab plates of Russell’s sandwiches and sit down in the parlour, Husk joins them. 

While everyone eats, Charlie explains to Sojourner the purpose behind the Hazbin Hotel. It takes her 30 minutes and two songs, but Sojourner listens intently. Vaggie watches the sailor’s reaction throughout her girlfriend’s presentation, secretly appreciating how much attention she’s giving Charlie. Huffing, puffing, and doing jazz hands at the crowded whiteboard now in the center of the room, Charlie waits for Sojourner’s response.

“So basically, you want to utilize CBT to redeem sinners?” Sojourner clarifies, taking a bite of a turkey and Swiss croissant.

“I wish.” Angel mutters, “But the fun police over here says ‘no drugs allowed’.” jerking his thumb at Vaggie who rolls her eye.

Sojourner looks at the film star confused, “What are you- Ooh~ No, not CB D , Charlie, Bravo, Tango!” She clarifies.

“I didn’t tango, but thank you!” Charlie smiles, wiping sweaty strands of blonde hair off her face. 

Her confusion growing, Sojourner looks at the princess, “I didn’t say you- OH~! No, that’s not what I was…you’re welcome.” She gives up, getting back on topic. Husk snorts, taking a bite of his own food. “C.B.T. is short for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.” Taking a sip of orange juice, Sojourner continues, “It’s the practice of recognizing your own thoughts, mood, and behavioral patterns and pinpointing the underlying causes and triggers so that you can adjust to a healthier lifestyle through self- awareness.”

Charlie stares wide-eyed at Sojourner, mesmerized. “There’s… there’s a name for it?!” She asks, shocked. 

Chewing another bite, Sojourner answers, “Well, there’s a term for it, but yeah! It’s a very effective way to help patients with mental illnesses like depression, anxiety, etc. or to treat PTSD/ C-PTSD.” 

Baxter adjusts his glasses, “Ah, yes, I recall reading a science journal in regards to psychology.” He comments smartly, “It’s a highly favored method of therapy.”

“Are you a therapist?” Niffty asks, leaning on Sojourner’s leg.

Answering the small maid, the sailor shakes her head. “Not at all, I do just a lot of self-help.” She covers her mouth while she chews.

“If ya don’t mind me askin’,” Angel starts, pulling apart an Italian wrap, “Why so much therapy if ya not aiming to be a shrink? What made ya interested in therapy in the first place?”

“I died while I was active duty military.” Sojourner answers, nonchalantly.

“Ooooohh~” Everyone but Husk says at once.

Yeah, that’ll do it.

Notes:

Ope, Charlie just found out CBT? And Sojo knows all about it due to self-care and self-help? How will this affect her stay?

Chapter 65: A Direct Order

Summary:

Azrael just made a big oops and that bungle just set everything into motion

Notes:

I have complicated feelings about Azrael. As much as I want to make him insufferable jerk off, I need to give him some redeemable qualities, like being terrified of messing up.

Date: April 01, 2026

Age: Ancient

Location: Paradise, Holy Warrior Training Grounds

Weather: Perfect. It’s never not perfect.

Current Conditions: Finishing up some brotherly bonding

 

Azrael looks down on Michael in disgust, his brother trembles on his hands and knees as another bout of dry coughing rips through his throat. ‘You pitiful, weak, embarrassment.’ The Death Angel sneers as he pulls in deep breaths of air, tendrils of his slicked ink black hair clings to his moist brow as a drop of sweat stings his red eyes. 

Beep beep, beep beep . 

Saved by the bell, “Training is over, I’m not impressed with your performance lately, brother.” Azrael huffs as Michael shakily stands to his feet. “Not to mention, your ever growing workload and overall attitude are less than desirable.” Michael says nothing as he pulls himself to attention. “I understand you are still grieving Adam, but you must also understand that it was your weakness that allowed that sinner to kill him as well.” 

Golden eyes widen in shock, what did he just say? “Pa-pardon?” Michael wheezes, unsure if he just heard his brother correctly.

Azrael blinks dully at him, “What part did you not understand?” He asks coldly, “The part where you’re letting your emotions shirk your Holy duties or the part where your weakness kept you from protecting your friend, costing Abel his father and Heaven of the First Man in creation?” Azrael waits for his brother’s reply.

Michael’s mind goes numb, this can’t be happening, right? Azrael cannot be blaming him for Adam’s death. 

Scoffing, the death angel circles him, “Still unclear? Fine, let me clarify: Because you cannot seem to let go of your victory in your battle with Roo, your pessimistic attitude only allows you to remember the hardship you trained for, clouding your focus and reducing you to a pitiful excuse of a warrior. That’s why Adam deemed you unworthy of continuing his Holy crusade with him.” The rhythmic thump of Azrael heavy black boots beat against the white marble training room floor. 

“This is your last extermination.” Adam’s voice echoes in Michael’s mind. The memory of Adam firing him begins to replay over and over again, how he tried to soften the blow by telling Michael that he was simply looking out for him. But now, Michael could see that even Adam knew how useless he truly was and then he had the gall to be angry with Adam after the extermination was over. 

The beat of the black boots continues, “Do you understand?” Azrael asks, leaning into his brother’s ear, “If you were a proper warrior, you would have been by Adam’s side in the final battle at the hotel. That sinner would have never gotten the chance to sneak up and kill Adam like the vile coward they all are. Lucifer would have never gotten the chance to save his daught-” Azrael snaps his mouth closed, realizing his mistake far too late. 

Michael turns his head and looks up at his brother, his golden eyes as wide as the planets. “Lucifer? Lucifer was there? And he has a daughter?” The look of horror on Azrael’s face is all the confirmation Michael needs. “What daughter, Azrael?” Dropping his bearing, the warrior angel turns to face his brother completely. Red eyes stare back at him as their owner struggles for an answer. “Azrael, what are you talking abo-” Michael starts.

“You’re dismissed.” The Angel of Death mumbles before pivoting on his heel and marching out the training room, leaving Michael completely alone.

Azrael’s heart slams in his chest as dread consumes his core. He fucked up, he fucked up so bad just now. He was given a direct order from Father, Himself, to keep the hotel and Charlie’s existence a secret from Michael specifically. He was to punish Michael for his weakness that caused Adam’s death, but to never speak of their niece.

‘Sera.’ The angel thinks to himself, panicked. “I need to speak to Sera now!” Six beautiful onyx wings with a ruby sheen sprout from Azrael’s back as he flies directly to the High Angelic Courthouse’s top floor. 

_________________

1213, H.A.C., Sera’s Office

The High Seraphim sighs heavily as she massages her temples, Abel’s therapist’s last report did not show promising signs of the man’s mental health improving. In addition, she and Emily had another argument this morning about when to announce Sir Pentious’ arrival. “A moment’s peace is all I ask, Dear Lord.” She whispers quietly, clasping her long hands together and closing her eyes in prayer. “Please, Father, I need guidance on what to do.” 

The stress Sera holds causes a tight ache to throb in her neck, she tries to rub it away with a groan while rotating her neck. Between handling the private memorial for Adam and the fallen exorcists, she is stuck for an answer on how to replace the ones that died. On top of that, Lute is struggling just as much as Abel with Adam’s death. But who can blame her? On top of losing a limb, the lieutenant was front and center when Adam was slain.

“I just wish she would consider therapy.” Sera sighs, knowing how much it would help the grieving veteran. But the last time it was suggested, Lute took it as an affront to her training and status as an exorcist, claiming therapy was only for weak minded cowards. Though, Sera knows that couldn’t be further from the truth. “Perhaps Raphael and I can interview a winner for- No, no, that could never work!” Winners cannot never know about the exterminations. Plus, that soul has earned their eternal rest, they shouldn’t be subjected to their earthly duties any longer.

This is too overwhelming, the High Seraphim feels a headache coming when aheavy breeze rustles the wide windows of her office as the bay doors burst open. “Sera…” Azrael breathes, “I have made a grave mistake.” The High Seraphim stares at the archangel, disturbed by how shaken he looks. 

“Calm yourself, Azrael.” Sera speaks calmly, pulling out a chair for him. “What is wrong?” She watches the ever stoic Angel hang his head in his hands as she takes a seat across from him. “Azrael.” Placing a cool hand on his heated shoulder, “What happened?” Sera asks, her concern growing with each passing second.

_________________

1234, ????, ????

Roo stares at her radio, swiveling lazily in her chair as she listens to the angels talk.

“What do I do? Father already knows!” Azrael panics.

The evil entity snorts, “Yeah, I do bud.” Tossing some trail mix in her mouth, Roo giggles as she chews. “Shame, as hot as you are, now I have to think of a clever way to punish you.” She sighs, tapping her boots as she ponders. 

Spinning around in her chair, “What do you think, Lilith? Got any suggestions for me?” 

The queen sits catatonic in the corner of the room, glaring hatefully. An angry breath passes through her nose.

Roo lifts shrugs, offended, “What? Got nothing to say?” She cracks up laughing and slaps her leg, “I’m sorry, but that will never get old!” The heat of Lilith’s glare intensifies. “Oh, come on! It was a good joke, lighten up.” Rolling her eyes, Roo spins back around.

_____________

February 16, 2026; Shores of Eden

Lilith had summoned Roo to the beach after Lute appeared before her and demanded that the queen returned to Hell to sort out her daughter. When Lilith ask Roo what the fuck the exorcist was talking about, she played dumb. She can’t have the queen change her mind and go help her daughter, that would be annoying as fuck. 

“Come with me, I have eyes and ears down in Hell and we’ll figure this out what that bitch is trying to pull.” Roo feigns confusion and anger as she leads Lilith away.

Once Roo got her alone in her pocket of space in Heaven, she attacked. It was almost laughable how easy it was to dupe and overpower the original woman of creation. Now that Roo had control over Lilith, she could use her vocal powers to better manipulate the seraphims. Too bad, Lilith decided to be a bad girl and try to escape; it forced Roo to trap her in her own body.

The entity of evil didn’t attempt to steal Lilith's soul. Based on the last time she made a deal, Roo discovered that she can only hold one soul at a time. That’s probably why Eve is M.I.A.. No worries though, Roo can still take on her image and fool Cain if need be. She just can’t be touched at all or her disguise will fall, nothing she hadn’t dealt with before.

Presently, Roo has another idea pop up in her devious mind. “You know, your brat is starting to make some serious waves?” She asks Lilith, knowing she can’t answer. “We should send someone down to see what’s really up, maybe distract her a little bit.” Yes, it’s all coming together, “Ooooooh, maybe our secret agent can go down there and kill everyone!” Roo claps her hands excitedly.

She can feel Lilith’s panicked energy radiate off her, feeding her power. “Relax, I won’t just send someone to slaughter everyone, that’s boring. No, we need your brat to think that Heaven is willing to give the hotel a try.” Oh, this is getting so good, “Then at the right moment, when your daughter believes her stupid dream can work…” Roo claps her hands sharply, “Devastation!” She cackles as she kicks her feet giddily

She skips to Lilith and squishes her cheeks, “And I have the perfect nutball for the job!”

_____________

1424, Rainbow Bridge

Abel sits in the pasture watching the animals roam and graze. Sighing heavily, he scratches Colonel Knobbles’ head and rests his chin on his hand. This last therapy session was a real doozy and as much as the shepherd hates to admit it, he’s been a lousy friend. 

“The hardest part is admitting that you’ve hurt someone, even if it was unintentional.” Abel repeats to himself, “When a loved one tells you how you’ve hurt them, it means there’s still potential to heal together.” The problem is he’s been avoiding his friends since Emily asked if he knew what his dad really did.

‘She looked so hurt.’ He pulls his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them, burying his face.

“Abel?” A light voice asks, “Are you alright?”

Spinning around, Abel looks up and sees Emily and Sir Pentious standing behind him. The seraphim’s hands twist around themselves nervously. 

Abel jumps to his feet, “Emily,” He whispers, looking at the snake, “Pen.” Nodding politely. The serpent gives a friendly wave and smiles.

Placing a supportive hand on Emily’s shoulder, Sir Pentious gives her a squeeze. “Go on, my dear. Jusssst like we practicssed.” The angel looks at her friend then turns her deep blue eyes to Abel.

“Abel?” Emily starts, steadying her nerves. “I came here to apologize.” She says clearly. Abel’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise, he wasn’t expecting this at all. “I didn’t take the time to consider your circumstances and blamed you for things outside of your control.” Emily continues, “I should’ve trusted our friendship and asked you to clarify once I calmed down, but instead I avoided you and that is something a friend would never do. I’m so sorry.” Her sweet voice catches, tears fill her eyes as she struggles not to cry. 

Sir Pentious smiles softly and rubs her back. Abel steps up and pulls her into his arms, getting a surprised squeak out of her. “Thank you, Emily.” Pressing his face into her shoulder, Sniff   “I accept your apology a-and hic forgive you.” Tears spill down his soft round face, “I’m sorry for the times I pushed you and Michael away when you tried to speak to me. I wasn’t able to explain how I was feeling so I ran away instead and I know now that really hurts.” He squeezes tighter, “You two are my best friends and I love you both so much.”

Emily sniffles and giggles, pulling her face away to look at her friend. Without thinking, she presses her lips to his in a firm kiss, ending it with an audible Mwah! She gasps, realizing what she just did.

Sir Pentious’s hand flies to his mouth in shock, “Oh dear!” He whispers as Emily covers her own mouth, blushing.

“I-I, goodness! I don’t know what came over me- MMMPH!!” Emily stammers before Abel dips her and captures her lips again. He stands her back up and breaks the kiss with a wet pop! Both stare at each while they catch their breath.

Pulling at his collar, Sir Pentious clears his throat, embarrassed. “Well, I sssee I’m not needed here, ssso I give you two some privacssy!” He bows quickly and excuses himself. The serpent only makes it a few feet before Colonel Knobbles rams into his side and knocks him over. Bleating triumphantly, the goat steals his top hat and runs away. “Foul beassst! Return my hat at once!” Sir Pentious snaps and chases after the goat.

Abel and Emily look after the two and back to each other, giggling softly, “He really is the worst goat ever.” Abel laughs lightly. Emily hums in agreement, stroking his cheek with her thumb. She leans down slightly and kisses him once again before pressing her forehead to his. 

“We need to apologize to Michael.” She says quietly, wrapping her arms around his neck. Abel’s golden eyes look down guilty as he nods in agreement. Planting a kiss on his forehead, Emily hugs Abel tightly. “It starts with sorry.” She whispers, rubbing soothing circles onto his back.

Hugging the love of his afterlife back, Abel sighs. “It starts with sorry.” He agrees.

Get that foot in the door.

Notes:

Oh, shit! Roo what are you up to girl? Stop being schemey and evil! Also, I love the idea of Emily and Abel being a thing! They're so darn cute!

Chapter 66: Brother's Keeper

Summary:

Azrael done messed up son and tries to take it out on Michael. Thankfully, Raphael is trying to right the wrongs on his part and intervene. Meanwhile, Michael struggles with long- repressed issues at the mention of his estranged twin and newfound niece.

Notes:

Hello my lovelies, this next week may be a little late as I will be on a road trip! I'll share details after I get back. Also thank you so much for so much traction on each of my updates! You all motivate me so much!

Date: April 01, 2026

Age: Ancient 

Location: Seraphim Palace

Weather: Beautiful pink sunset with a warm breeze

Current Conditions: Reeling from some accidental truth being spilled

“I deeply apologize, Lord Michael, Her Majesty is still in conference with Lord Azrael and Lord Gabriel.” Mabel reports for the fourth time today. “I shall notify you at once when they are done.” Her posh English accent promises, sympathetically.

Michael sighs and rubs his tired eyes with the towel around his neck. “No need, Ms. Mabel, thank you for your patience and help.” He bids the bumblebee secretary goodbye and hangs up, tossing the cell on the bed before flopping down on the soft surface. 

Snapping his fingers, the lights switch off and his ceiling displays the Milky Way galaxy. Michael watches a comet slowly streak across the nebula as he lets his mind wander. He has a niece? Lucifer had a child and no one told him? ‘Why would they tell you?’ The warrior thinks bitterly to himself, ‘When have they ever involved you in anything that didn’t involve your duties?’ His bare, scarred chest tightens and aches with resentment.

Rolling over to his side, Michael looks out his bay windows, seeing Paradise City illuminated below. The street lights shine on the strip of downtown as bright billboards flash faces of happy winners. An advertisement for a romance movie plays on a giant monitor of one of the tall buildings in the center of the plaza.

Romance, that’s what started the entire mess that is humanity. Some fluke romance between that clay statue, Lilith, and his twin brother, Samael. His anger flares, ‘ It’s all that bitch’s fault!’ Seething, Michael snaps his fingers sharply and his black out curtains close, enveloping him in darkness save for the galaxy above.

Turning his toned back towards the window, Michael curls in on himself. That deceitful woman, it’s her fault his brother isn’t here with him, why his family is broken, why Azrael trains him the way he does. It’s all her fault, seducing his innocent brother and taking advantage of his naivety and powers. Her cursed tongue and body convincing Samael to steal that stupid apple and damn humanity for her selfish intentions! 

Now where is she? Missing in action from what he heard from the grapevine, which pisses him off even more. All that war, pain, and heartache, for what? A marriage that was doomed to fail? A union that was a mistake from the jump? Michael’s nails dig into his arms and draw golden blood that drips onto the white bedsheets. 

“I wasted all that time…” The archangel growls, dragging his nails into his biceps and leaving bleeding gashes in his alabaster skin. “If he had just fuckin’ waited…” Tears sting his golden eyes as Michael pushes away the memory. “We could’ve all stayed together, you idiot.” He sniffs as his eyes squeeze shut with tears. “Why was she more important than me?” 

Blue and gold wings flare out and wrap themselves around the small angel as he curls further into himself. The beautiful feathers form a cocoon around Michael as he quietly cries himself to sleep.

_______________

1947, Seraphim Palace, Foyer

“Move out of my way, now Raphael .” Azrael hisses, the scaleras of his eyes turning black with his red pupils burning bright with anger.

The healer stands his ground, blocking Azrael from heading up to Michael’s wing of the palace. “No! I’m not going to let you torment him just because you messed up!” He spits back just as angry. “Why are you mad at Michael for your slip of the tongue? Where’s the logic in that?” 

Azrael’s face flushes gold with embarrassment, “How dare you!” He starts, his black wings flit a warning.

“How dare me? HOW DARE YOU?” Raphael snarls, incredulously. “You disobeyed Father and now you want to take it out on Michael because you know he’s forbidden to fight back! You’re weak!” The healing angel hisses the last word with venom.

A ruby red scythe flashes in Azrael’s hand, an icy chill radiates from the holy weapon as the air gets denser. A golden halberd appears in Raphael’s grip, the air buzzes with electricity.

“ ENOUGH!” Sera booms as her white wings enclose around the brothers and transport them to her office. Her true form subdues both the archangels’ weapons from their hands, muting their powers. The brothers turn away from each other, each burning with spiteful wrath. “Calm yourselves at once, else you invite sin into our sanctuary!” Sera orders, her holy light blinding both of them.

Raphael sighs sadly, “Forgive me, Sera.” He apologizes, “I forgot myself and allowed anger to fill my heart.” The High Seraphim looks from the healer to the reaper.

Smoothing back his black locks, Azrael concedes. “Please forgive me, Sera. I lost control of myself and raised my weapon to my kin.” He glares hotly at Raphael, “I acknowledge that my actions could have put my family at risk.” 

Satisfied with the apologies, Sera drops her higher form. “What is the meaning of this quarrel?” She demands, her blue eyes shifting between the two brothers. “Speak. Now. ” She commands through clenched teeth.

Raphael turns towards Sera, “Azrael returned home in poor temper and was marching towards Michael’s wing of the palace. Knowing Michael was already sleeping, I stopped Azrael from waking him and asked him what wanted with him.” Hazel eyes spare a dark glance towards his brother who refuses to make eye contact. Raphael continues, “I already knew Azrael is awaiting discipline from Father, but he refused to give me a clear answer on what he wanted with Michael.” 

Azrael turns sharply, “I don’t need to explain myself to you! I am in charge of his training and readiness.” The angel of death spits angrily.

“And I am in charge of his well-being!” Raphael retorts, getting in Azrael’s face, “You already had your time with Michael today during your brutal training. As his primary care provider, it is my duty to ensure that he gets the necessary rest and attention he needs! That includes not allowing his much needed sleep to be interrupted by tantrums!” 

Azrael snarls before Sera raises her hand in warning, halting another violent outburst from the death angel. “Azrael?” She asks, turning her full attention to him, “Is this an accurate account of what just happened?”

Ruby red eyes refuse to meet lavender blue ones, “More or less.” He grumbles, his fists clenching tightly at his sides.

“What did you need Michael for?” Sera presses as she fights to keep anger off her face. Her efforts grow more difficult when Azrael fails to answer. “ Azrael. ” A heavy warning sits in the High Seraphim’s tone, “What did you need Michael for?” She asks again slowly. His silence is all the evidence she needs to confirm Raphael’s testimony. “I see.” She speaks softly, taking a steadying breath. “Azrael, you will no longer oversee Michael’s training until further notice.” 

Raphael’s mouth drops as Azrael’s reaper form consumes his handsome face. An eerie shadow engulfs glowing white skin as haunting red pupils and white teeth appear in the void that used to be his face. His black turtleneck and cargo pants outfit dissipate into a swirling black cloak that seems to suck in the very essence of the room. Sera stands unfazed before the terrifying angelic form as Raphael looks away, still frightened of the image his brother takes to escort damned souls to Hell.

Blinking calmly, Sera speaks. “Until you can prove that you can treat Michael without any harm or prejudice, I cannot trust his safety around you.” An echoing screech rings out in protest, chilling Raphael to his core. “This is my final decision, you are forbidden from entering Michael’s wing or to be near him without supervision from myself, Raphael, or Gabriel. Any more incursions will result in a court hearing, do you understand?” The reaper snarls angrily, “I need a verbal yes or no, Azrael. Do you understand?” Sera asks firmly, narrowing her eyes at the tantruming angel.

“Yes.” Azrael’s voice sounds like a whirlpool of wind, his entire frame shakes with instability. Sera and Raphael look at him alarmed, this is so unlike him.

“Azrael?” The healer begins emitting a calming aura, “Brother, come back to us.” He calls gently, opening his arms to the struggling reaper. 

The death angel groans and grabs his head, his normal face peeking out from the shadow, “ h e lp ... m e…” He pleads weakly, “ H ea r t h u r ts! Fa t her, so angry!” Azrael’s angelic face and reaper persona tear at him for control as the angel cries out in pain. 

A cold chill runs down Sera’s spine, this is Azrael’s punishment for his mistake? To turn into a savage, primitive beast? She shakes her head, what is she doing? Why is she questioning Father’s will? Surely, this punishment means something and even so, it’s not up to her if she doesn’t understand.

“Azrael!” Raphael cries, reaching for his brother. Sera’s arm stops him, moving them both away from the tormented angel. 

“We cannot interfere with divine punishment, Raphael!” Sera argues, hurt displayed plainly on her beautiful face, “If this is Father’s will, then there’s nothing we can do to help him.”

The two watch helplessly as Azrael writhes on the floor, crying for mercy. After what seems like an eternity, the archangel falls silent as he finally passes out from exhaustion. Sera lets out a shuddering breath as she blinks her eyes, feeling tears slide down her cheeks. She has no clue when she started crying, but it had to be for a while due to the soaked collar of her gown.

“Sera.” Raphael breathes, tapping her hand gently, “Sera, you have to let go. I need to check on him.” Confused, Sera looks down at the healer, she has him pulled close to her body. Whether it was for his protection or her comfort is anyone’s guess. “Sera.” Raphael calls again. “Let go, please. It’s okay, it’s over.” 

It takes more concentration that Sera wants to admit to make her hands to release Raphael, allowing him to walk over and immediately start looking over his unconscious brother. Azrael’s usually luminous skin is dull and clammy with sweat beading on his temples and forehead. Tremors shake his strong body as the reaper pulls in ragged breaths unevenly, his temperature is hot to the touch. Raphael’s eyes glow an earthly green as he places his hands over Azrael’s forehead and heart, pouring in his healing aura. The shivering stops as the death angel falls into a peaceful sleep, his chest rising and falling in a calm rhythm. 

Sitting back on his heels, Raphael looks at his sleeping brother. What happened to all of them? When did arguing and fighting become the norm? Azrael used to be the most peaceful and nurturing out of all their siblings, now Raphael and Gabriel have to take turns making sure he doesn’t do anything too extreme to Michael. And the rest of the family? They turn a blind eye, frightful of what will become of them if they speak up against this cruel treatment. They’ve been this way since the trial, since the fall, since the battle against her . 

The healer rubs his tired eyes before picking up Azrael off the floor, “I’m going to take him home. He’s not working tomorrow, doctor’s orders.” Raphael and Azrael disappear in a flurry of Angelica petals, leaving Sera alone.

The High Seraphim lets out a choked sob as fresh tears spill down her cheeks. Covering her face, Sera sobs, moment’s peace is all she begs for.

Is that too much to ask?

Notes:

Bro we got some DRAMA! What do yall think of Michael's inner turmoil? Thoughts on Azrael, please? I love this story so damn much.

Chapter 67: Temporary Assisted Duty (T.A.D.)

Summary:

Michael reminisces about when he was crowned his Father's warrior, what other task will his "father" require of me.

Notes:

With the voice of the Big G announced, I will still keep the title of 'father' for continuity sakes. I'm beyond stoked to hear Liz Callaway in the new seasons!

Date: April 02, 2026

Age: Ancient

Location: H.A.C. 

Weather: Weirdly enough, it's perfect, dummy

Current Conditions: The kind of tired where you reread the same thing six times and it still doesn’t stick

Headache. That is the only thing Michael is feeling right now, is a full-blown, eyeball bursting, tooth clenching, headache. Why in Father’s name is Heaven so freaking bright all the damn time? He presses the heel of his hands hard against his golden eyes and groans, searching for any kind of relief. Sighing, he drops his hands and grits through another painful pulsing spell that shoots from the mask of his face over the top of his head and ending at the base of his neck. This sucks so much, Michael can’t even look at a file for more than a minute before his vision starts to blur.

‘Your workload and overall attitude are less than desirable.’ Azrael’s voice echoes in the warrior's head, sending a wave of shame and guilt through his mind. Staring at the stacked pile in his incoming basket, hopelessness hit Michael like a punch to the chest. Why this duty? What about him made Father decide that he should be the one to judge souls? 

Michael remembers that day, it was the same day Sam- he brought the ladybug up from the garden to show him. Gabriel had come to tell him that Father needed to speak to him. Michael figured he would get scolded again for what his twin did and how he tried to cover for him again. But no, the warm beacon of light sat him down and spoke gently to him.

_____________

A Very Long Time Ago

“Do you know why I called for you, Michael?” A voice so familiar, yet indescribable asks the young angel. 

Looking up at the warm beacon of light, he shakes his head. “No, Father, I don’t.” Michael admits as he nervously taps his finger against his leg. ‘Am I in trouble?’

The voice chuckles, “Calm yourself, dear child. You have done no wrong.” A breath of relief leaves the little seraphim before he can stop it. “I have summoned you because of your dutifulness and responsible nature. I have a job for you.”

Michael perks up, surprised. “Yes, Father. What shall You have me do?” He asks eagerly, already excited to share the news with Samael.

“In the future, as humanity grows, you will oversee how they choose to live their lives. If they were just and if they have done well on Earth, they will spend eternity in Paradise.” The warm light explains, “You will decide who deserves to stay by my side or who does not.”

The little angel tilts his head,  “Father, what shall happen to those that choose to do poorly?”

“All will be known in due time, child.” The voice says, sounding…sad? “You will be the one to guard our sanctuary in Heaven, because you know what is right by Me. This is your purpose Michael, My warrior.”

_____________

Present Day

“Father knew.” Michael leans back in his chair as he taps his finger against the polished surface of his desk. “He knew what Sam- Lucifer was going to do before even he knew himself.” Burying his face in his hands, Michael groans. Why did it have to be Sam? Why his twin? His best friend? ‘Stop this now.’ He chastises himself, ‘It is not your place to question why this is so. It just is.’  

A fresh wave of guilt crashes over Michael, ever since Adam died, he’s had more and more of these blasphemous thoughts. Lacing his fingers together, the warrior lowers his head. “Father, please forgive me and my treacherous thoughts.” He prays, “I know it is not my place to question Your will, but I struggle with questions that no one here can answer. Please take these rebellious notions away from me and know I am ever Your dutiful son. Amen.”

Knock, knock, knock.

He sighs, the last thing he needs is more distractions, “Enter.” He calls as he picks up a gray folder and stamps it, turning it blue and putting it in the ‘Outgoing’ basket. The door opens, Abel and Emily peek their heads in. Michael looks up and pauses, well this is very unexpected. Quickly shaking off his shock, the warrior picks up another gray folder, “Abel, Emily.” He says dryly, pushing down the confusing emotions he feels. “Is there something you need?”

The two walk in and close the door, tentatively walking to the center of the room. “Hello, Michael.” Abel greets, quietly. “Do you have a moment to talk?” Emily stands close beside him and fiddles with the high collar of her dress.

“Not really.” Michael answers curtly, his bottled emotions building pressure in his chest. “What is it?” He refuses to lift his eyes.

“Michael, please, look at us.” Emily pleads, gently. “This is really important.” She fights not to gasp when golden eyes give her an icy stare. ‘He’s so upset.’ She thinks worriedly. “Can we all have a seat?” 

The warrior heaves a sigh and snaps his fingers, making two simple chairs appear in front of his desk. He stamps the folder and turns it red, placing it in the ‘Outgoing’ basket. 

“Together?” Emily’s voice is small as she gestures to the couch before fiddling with her collar again. “Please?” 

Without saying a word, Michael stands up stiffly and walks over to the couch, sitting at the very end with his arms crossed as he waits for Abel and Emily to join him. They give him a respectful amount of space and angle their bodies towards him. Michael looks straight ahead and leans against the armrest, no one speaks for a while.

“What is it?” The archangel asks again, already fed up with the silence.

Abel takes a deep breath, “We came by to apologize.” He places his hat on the coffee table before lacing his hands together. “The both of us.”

Heavy eyebrows leap up in surprise, nothing could have prepared Michael for this. “What? Why?” Genuine curiosity heavy in his tone. “What did you do?” His head turns to his estranged friends.

“We abandoned you.” Emily speaks, “We shut you out with no explanation from either of us.” Her chest squeezes tight with guilt. ‘It starts with sorry.’

The first winner continues, “When dad died, I pushed you and Emily away. I didn’t know how to deal with my grief, so I shut down. There were so many times you, personally, reached out to me and I said hurtful things to you so you would leave me alone.” Abel takes a shaky breath.

Michael looks away, his arms crossing tighter, “You lost your dad, you’re allowed to grieve whichever way you need.” ‘...your weakness is what kept you from protecting your friend, costing Abel his father…’ He tenses up, Azrael was right. 

“Michael? Hey Michael, did you hear me just now?” Abel gently shakes his shoulder, “Where are you?” Instantly recognizing the distant look on his friend’s face, “Stay in the present, stay with us.” Abel turns to his girlfriend, “Sweetie, some cold water, please? And a towel.” Emily nods and runs out of the room. “Michael, name me five reptiles.” When he doesn’t answer, Abel kneels down in front of the warrior, tapping his knees to get his attention. “Michael!” The shepherd says earnestly, gold eyes look at him, “Name five reptiles.”

“Lizard, komodo dragon, turtle, tortoise, bearded dragon.” Michael finally answers.

“Four amphibians.” Abel continues to tap Michael’s knees.

Struggling to remember, the archangel stutters out four more answers. “Frog, toad, newt, salamander.”

“Good job, three flightless birds.” The winner coaches him, Emily quietly returns with ice water and three hand towels. “Thank you, sweetie.” She nods as preps the towel to place it on Michael's hands.

“Cassowary, penguin, emu.” The warrior’s voice chokes up as his lip begins to quiver. “M-my fault…” Michael hiccups, his nails dig into his biceps, nearly ripping the fabric.

“Shhhh… no it’s not. Two insects that can fly.” Abel hushes him, keeping on track.

Sniff, sniff . “Beetle, la-ladybug.” Tears spill down gold tinted cheeks, Emily gently pulls his arms away from himself and wraps the cold, wet towel around his hands and gently squeezes. The cold snaps Michael out of his impending spiral.

“Last one, name me one large mammal from North America.” Abel directs as he keeps up his tapping.

“The American black bear.” Michael sniffs, trying to calm down. Finally looking at his friends, a painful ache pulls at his heart. “I’m so sorry, Abel.” He whispers.

“What for?” Pat, pat, pat.

“Not saving Adam.” The tapping stops. Abel looks at Emily then back at Michael.

“What are you talking about? You weren’t there at the last battle, you don’t participate in exterminations anymore.” Emily asks, confused at his apology.

The warrior nods, “Exactly, if I had been there, then I could’ve kept him from getting killed.” Hanging his head, “If I wasn’t weak, Adam wouldn’t have had to fire me and-”

Abel reels back, flabbergasted. “Woah, hang on. Dad didn’t fire you! He saw how bad the exterminations were hurting you and wanted to help.”

“Of course he would say it like that!” Michael snaps, “He knew what a hindrance I actually was! If I was a stronger person, then I wouldn’t have to be pulled from the exterminations and-”

“Michael, that’s enough!” Emily barks, making the two men jump. “Who in the world told you such nonsense?” She demands, her eyes glowing with anger. “Tell me now! Was it Azrael?” Her third eye appears in the center of her chest. 

Abel grabs Emily’s wrist and squeezes, “Emmy, calm down. Michael doesn’t need that right now.” He soothes, rubbing his thumb over her hand. “Relax and help me.” 

Blinking rapidly, Emily takes a deep breath and secures her angelic form. “I’m so sorry. That just made me so upset.” Her sweet voice tremors with anger. “I can’t believe he would say something so ugly to you, Michael.”

“It wasn’t your fault that dad died.” Abel says, looking away. “He is a casualty of a war he started.” Emily and Michael stare at Abel surprised. “Dad made the decision to enter a battle and therefore accepted the risk of not coming home. Whether he actually believed that would happen is no longer here nor there.” The shepherd wipes a tear off his cherub face. “For anyone to blame you for his death is an insult to everyone who died in battle. Winner or sinner.” Abel looks at his friend and smiles sadly, “Don’t ever blame yourself for something you didn’t do.”

Michael looks between his two friends and opens his mouth to speak when the door knocks again. The trio turns to the door, who could that be?

“Lord Michael?” Mabel asks, politely. “Your presence is requested in Her Majesty’s office right away, sir.”

“Than- ahem! Thank you, Mabel.” Michael answers and unwraps his hands, drying them with a clean towel. He sits silently before speaking up again. “Thank you Abel and Emily, thank you for coming back.” The couple throw their arms around him in a warm hug, Michael lets himself relax in their embrace. “I have to go. Can we meet up later?” They pull away with bright smiles on their faces, both eagerly nodding their heads in agreement. The warrior chuckles and stands up. “I’ll see you both later.”

“See you later, Michael.” Abel waves.

“Bye, Michael!” Emily bounces happily on the tips of her toes.

_____________

High Seraphim Office

Gabriel watches Sera pace back and forth in front of the window, her long fingers pinch her chin in deep thought. “Why him of all people? Surely, there are better candidates that are more suitable for such an important task.”

“Maybe it's because he judges souls.” Gabriel asks, “If anyone is able to see the difference in a soul it would be him, right?”

Sera stops pacing and looks at the messenger, “That… makes sense. Yes, thank you Gabriel. And are you sure you’re up to fill in for his absence?”

A jolly smile sits on the archangel's wooly face, “I covered for him when he was on bedrest, the turnover shouldn’t be that difficult. Plus when he comes back to give reports, he and I can sit down and sort through the files!” The sentiment calms Sera as she gives a sigh of relief, nodding before returning to her pacing. 

Ding! The elevator doors open and Michael steps into the pristine office, “Sera.” He greets respectfully, looking over to his brother, “Gabriel?” The large angel gives a friendly wave and pats the chair next to him. Sitting down, Michael glances between the two seraphims, “Is something wrong?” He asks, trying to keep his voice even.

Steadying her thoughts, Sera turns to the warrior. “Michael, thank you for coming so quickly.” He nods in response, still unsure why he’s here. “We have received another message from On High.” Sera explains, watching him stiffen. “Father has a special task for you.”

And what a task it is.

 

Chapter 68: Not So Different

Summary:

Sojo has a particular hard day at work and feels bad about it. Coming home she has a heart to heart with the Big Boss of Hell himself, Lucifer!

Date: April 18, 2026

Age: Almost 8 years in Hell

Location: I.M.P. Headquarters

Weather: Cold and somehow, muggy

Current Conditions: Fixing the damn wall… again. At least it’s the last job of the day.

 

“For fuck’s sakes, Blitzø how many damn times do I have to repair this wall?” Sojourner fusses as she packs up her tools. 

The C.E.O. rolls his eyes, “Oh, unwad your thong, repair bear. It wasn’t even that bad this time.” The tall imp argues.

Sojourner looks at him incredulously, “The fuck you mean? It was a foot and a quarter larger than the last one! Why are people busting your wall so much?”

“Because fuckwits don’t know how to use a door.” Loona calls from the desk, her feet propped up on the surface as she scrolls through her phone.

The electrician scoffs, “Well you for damn sure got that right, babe.” Dusting off her hands, she stuffs her gloves into Hot Mic. “I don’t understand, if your clients are coming here for closure, why would they destroy your office?”

Rubbing his neck uncomfortably, Blitzø looks away. “Eeehh, who knows? Maybe part of the grieving process?” He has no idea how he managed to sell Sojourner on them being grief consultants specializing in closure, but he’s too far deep now.

Sojourner sighs and places her hands on her hips, “I suppose so, but you should definitely think of installing a rage room or something. Because this,” She gestures to the newly repaired window and wall, “Ain’t it.” 

“Thanks again for fixin’ the wall for us, sugar.” Millie says, smiling with the cutest gap in her teeth. “Moxxie is busy with the bills in the other room, this is a huge load offa him.” Her tail swished happily from side to side

Red and green eyes lower in annoyance, “Oh, so I’m not being paid for this repair job either?” She asks Blitzø, crossing her arms.

Giving the bear his best cheeky smile, “What’s a repair job between friends?” The imp asks, hoping to charm her once again. 

“Another invoice I’m adding to your tab!” Sojourner snaps, “Blitzø, one of these days, you’re gonna have to settle your account! Four wall repairs ain’t cheap and that’s a half day’s work for me down the drain!” She explains, impatiently. “Hell, you don’t even keep up with our thrice negotiated payment plan! It’s a $100 bucks every month with no interest, no one else is gonna give you that, so do not fuck me on this!”

Growling, Blitzø stomps his foot, “Alright! Christ on a surfboard, I got it!” He tails whips back and forth in irritation.

“Blitzø!” Millie snaps at her boss, desperate to keep the company on Sojourner’s good side. “Mind yer manners and say thank you!” She reminds him through gritted teeth.

“Um, hello?” An uppity voice interrupts, snapping her fingers. The room turns to the pastel pink hen sinner, her overly large bust almost spills out of her starched blazer. “Is this I.M.P.?” She crosses her arms impatiently, swinging her huge handbag obnoxiously.

“Ugh, fuck me with a rusty spike.” Blitzø mutters before straightening up, “Yes it is, I’m Blitzø the ‘o’ is silent. How can we help you today?” He sticks his hand out with a forced smile.

Scoffing the woman, rolls her eyes and loosely grabs his hand, “I was told you things could help me with people still ‘up there’?” She digs through her purse and pulls out hand sanitizer, making a huge gesture to clean her hands.

Sojourner narrows her eyes at the woman, ‘You things?’

Blitzø grits his teeth, “Yes, that’s what we’re here for, lady-” A scream followed by a huge crash from the other room gets everyone’s attention.

“Moxxie?” Millie calls out, running out the room to her husband. “Oh hell, Blitzø, Loona! It fell again!” 

The gothic hellhound lets out a groan and drags herself from her desk, still texting as she leaves the room. “Aw, shit! Blitzø! It’s bad!”

“Satan’s balls, Moxxie! I’m with a client right now!” Bltizø snaps before turning to the two sinners. “Sojo, give me a sec. Lady, I’ll be back soon!” He sprints out of the room.

Letting out an offended huff, the pompous hen rolls her eyes again and crosses her arms, “Fine, but don’t keep me waiting.” She brushes past Sojourner and sits down on the couch, snapping her fingers at the bear, “You, I’ll take an americana medium roast with brown sugar and something fat free to snack on.” 

The bear stares at the woman and then looks around, wondering who she is speaking to.

Snapping her fingers again, the sinner gets the sailor’s attention. “Hello? Are you deaf? Go get me my refreshments!” Pulling out a nail file, the woman begins to treat her pink, acrylic nails.

The sailor blinks, she must be going blind because this chicken nugget must be speaking to someone that Sojourner can’t see. “Lady, who are you talking to?” Putting her weight to one hip, she crosses her arms.

“You, obviously!” The busty woman clarifies as she sneers at the bear, “Now go get me my coffee!”

Chuckling to herself, Sojourner shuffles her feet. “Miss ma’am, even if I did work here, I wouldn’t get you a fuck thang with the way you’re talking crazy to me.”

“Oh, that’s the problem with you people .” The hen clucks, “You can’t even follow the simplest of orders! Just incompetent and lazy!”

Mismatched eyes widen to the size of saucers, “ You people? ” She asks, positive she misheard this woman, “The fuck do you mean ‘ you people’ ?” Sojourner leans on her knees, waiting for a response.

“What? Do you need me to sing it like Bob Marley? Your dreadlocks too tight? Go get me something to drink!” The sinner claps her hand with the last few syllables. Scoffing again, the hen goes back to filing her nails. 

Searing hot rage flares in Sojourner’s chest, “Know what? Imma go take myself in the back before I beat your bigoted, boiled, blanched, unseasoned ass into next week.” The bear nods to herself as she crosses the back room to walk where Blitzø and the others are, “Cuz the way you have no idea how much danger you’re in right now is biblical .”

The hen’s pink feathers bristle with indignation, “Unseasoned? Well, you would know about seasonings wouldn’t you, Jemimah?” She flings her file at Sojourner and it bounces off her head, “If I had help like you when I was in Mississippi and I would have fired them so fa-”

_______________

Other Room

“Okay Mox, you survived, so you can stop cryin’ now.” Blitzø huffs as he and Loona lift the last filing cabinet off the little imp. “And I promise I’ll have someone help you with all these fuckin’ pap-” BAM! A hard crash against the wall sends the filing cabinet tumbling down again, barely missing Moxxie as his wife pulls out of the way at the very last second.

“The fuck was that?” Loona wonders as she peeks her head into the main room, “OH, SHIT!  SOJO, NO!” The wolf drops her phone and runs out of the back office.

Blitzø and Millie stare in Loona’s direction, shocked at the outburst, “The fuck?” Blitzø asks as the three imps follow after her. “Loonie, what wr- OH FUCK ME!” The assassin shouts as he runs in on Sojourner straddling the hen and punching her repeatedly. “SOJO, THE FUCK?” He runs over and tries to pull the small bear off. It catches him completely by surprise when she tosses him like a hay bale and he lands upside down on the couch on the opposite side of the room. 

Sojourner goes to resume fighting the sinner when Loona tackles her to the floor. 

“Chill the fuck out!” Loona snarls before Sojourner bucks her off and rolls back to her feet, scanning the room for the next attack.

Blitzø stares astounded, since when do sinners know how to fight like that? “Millie!” He sics his best fighter on the bear. 

The wrathian brawler frowns, “Sojo, I don’t wanna fight you, but I fuckin’ will if you don’t settl-” Sojourner ducks as Loona lunges at her from behind, tackling Millie instead. 

BANG! A gunshot rings out as Moxxie lowers his weapon, “That’s enough!” He snarls, helping his wife up.

VRWOOMP! The ex-mobster’s gun is yanked from his hand and gets stuck to the ceiling, the team gasps in shock staring at the weapon then to Sojourner. A distant stare takes over her eyes as she holds out her hand, all metallic objects not bolted down fly up to join the gun. The red and green lights that line Sojourner’s arms shine brightly as sparks begin to dance off the wires in her hair.

“Repair bear?” Blitzø calls out cautiously, holding his hands up to keep everyone else still. “Hey, we’re all done. No more fighting, okay? Can ya tune back in now?” Slowly, Sojourner turns to him and blinks, slowly waking up. “There she is, come back, Bear Grylls.”

The sailor squints at her friend, “Blitzø?” She asks, coming out of her haze. “What am I- gasp! ” She looks around as a horrified expression crosses her face. “Oh no, no, no! Not again!” Her magnetism drops, Moxxie catches his gun as the rest of the objects fall to the ground. “Are you guys okay? Did I hurt anyone?” Sojourner asks in a panic. 

“Uh~ Well…” Moxxie points to the bloodied chicken on the floor, she groans in pain. 

Looking at the wounded sinner, Sojourner shakes her head, “No, I meant you guys! Did I hurt someone important?” She asks, urgently, looking between the crew of four.

“I’m fine.” Millie quips, scratching the back of her head, confused by the sudden shift in demeanor. “Are y’all good?”

Loona and Moxxie mumble in agreement while Blitzø shrugs and nods, “I landed on the couch, so yeah, nothing broken.”

Letting out a sigh of relief, “Thank goodness. I was scared I hurt one of y’all.” The sailor clutches her chest, relaxing. 

“Quick question,” Moxxie holds up a finger, “Why did you beat up our client?” The sinner in question coughs out blood. 

Sojourner frowns and glares at the woman, “She was hella out of line and being racist. I was tryna walk away and she decided to test my gangster.”

“Oh? Well, can’t say she didn’t have it comin’.” Blitzø dusts off his jacket and straightens his lapel. “Lady, because you suck entire donkey dicks, we work out our claim to say fuck off.” He turns his chin up at the bleeding sinner on the floor.

Moxxie runs a hand down his face, “It’s ‘exercise our right to refuse service’, sir.” He corrects tiredly, Miillie giggles.

Waving him off, Blitzø nods, “Yeah, clean up your blood and fuck off, chicken bitch.” Looking at Sojourner, the tall imp asks, “So ya got magic powers and shit?” Raising an impressed eyebrow.

Rubbing her arm, Sojourner shrugs, “Kinda sorta, yeah.” She confirms, “It only works when I’m upset though, so…” Crossing her arms, she sighs. “Sorry about tossing you guys around.” The bear apologizes.

“Oh please, honey, we’ve all weathered far worse!” Millie grins, “Gotta say, I’d love to spar ya one-on-one. Ya really know what yer doin’, it’s impressive!” 

Sojourner laughs humorlessly, “Yeah, that sounds fun.” She looks away, upset. ‘I can’t believe I slipped again.’

“Sojo? Are you okay?” Moxxie asks, concerned.

“I will be, darlin’, don’t worry about me. And Blitzø?” She looks at the I.M.P. leader.

“Yeah?” He answers, also confused at her somber mood.

“Forget about this repair job, it’s on the house.” She picks up the bleeding sinner and tosses the busty chicken over her shoulder. “I’m gonna take this bitch to the hospital. I’ll see y’all later.” Sojourner waves goodbye and leaves the deadly team until next time.

Blitzø watches her leave before turning to the others, “Did you know the fuckin’ X-Men were real?” Jamming his thumb in Sojourner’s direction.

__________

2348, Hazbin Hotel

“You need anything before I turn in, sir?” Husk asks, putting the last glass away for the night. 

Lucifer shakes his head and smiles, “Not at all, Henry. Thank you and have a good night!” Taking a sip of his spiced apple-tini, the king twiddles his fingers at the chimera. 

“Good night, sir.” Husk says, not bothering to correct him on his name again. He climbs into the elevator, tapping his floor’s button.

The angel watches the elevator doors close before dropping his smile, he’s exhausted. He’s tired, and sleepy, and wary, and exhausted all at once. It’s been just over two months since he’s moved in with Charlie and their relationship still feels like a tightrope walk. Lucifer can see the difference in how she smiles with everyone else versus how she smiles at him, there’s still so much awkward tension. 

Neither can have a functioning conversation without someone else there as a buffer for them when they fall silent. And the father and daughter duo fall silent a lot. Lucifer lowers his head on to his stacked fists and fights back another sigh, he wants so badly for Charlie to be more comfortable near him, but how?

“Skipper?” A soft voice calls out to him. Startled, Lucifer swivels around and sees… what’s her name again? Pogo? “You alright?” The bear asks gently.

Immediately putting on his ‘king face’, Lucifer boasts proudly, “Of course I am!” He laughs, flashing her a bright smile. “I was just thinking!”

Sojourner studies the angel, noticing the bags under his eyes and how tightly he holds his back and shoulders, “Oh, what about?” She asks, inquisitively as she approaches the bar, stopping as he stiffens. ‘Oof, that’s some nasty anxiety.’ She observes, watching his face carefully. 

Lucifer waves her off, “Oh, just how I’m gonna help my Ducky tomorrow!” He says casually, “She’s been all over those books you gave her! Man, her ideas are flying out a mile a minute!”

The sailor smiles warmly, “Yeah, I think it’s really cool how quickly she’s created new lesson plans and adapted her previous ones.” Walking up to the bar slowly, Sojourner takes a seat one away from the king, giving him space. “It’s been awesome helping her.”

The king leans his elbows on the clean bar counter, “Yeah, yeah, you really have been helpful.” He laments, his shoulders drooping as he looks away from her. “Seems like everyone has been helping her…” Lucifer trails off. 

Sojourner tilts her head as she listens, ‘Is he upset that she’s receiving help? No, that can’t be it.’ “I know you being here means a huge deal to her.” She offers. 

Lucifer perks up and turns to her. “No, no. That’s…I’m…no.” He finally sighs, giving up on what he was going to say. “I’m no help to her.” The angel says after a few moments of silence.

‘There it is.’ “Why not?” Sojourner asks, resting her head against her propped up fist.

Swirling his drink in controlled little circles, Lucifer struggles to find the right words. “Charlie… has done all this on her own so far and I’ve…” He catches himself, realizing who he’s speaking to. “I’ve been so busy being king and y’know…” He chuckles, tapping his glass with a forced smile. Lucifer clears his throat and downs the rest of his drink. “Whelp, it’s been great catching up with you, Logo, but we both have busy days tomorrow, so I’m just gonna hit the sack.” He leaps off the stool and turns to walk to the elevator.

‘Just take the shot!’ “I have really bad anxiety too.” Sojourner says, stopping the king in his tracks.

“Ex- ahem . Excuse me, whatcha mean?” Lucifer chuckles, not turning around.

“I think the worst part for me is the brain fog.” The sailor continues, “I can know someone for years and still forget their voice over the phone.” She thinks back to when she couldn’t remember Señora’s name. “Someone can tell me something really important and, gun to my head, I can’t remember a damn thing.” 

Lucifer’s scorched hands clench in nervous fists, remembering how he struggled to remember where Charlie was when she called him for help with Heaven. 

“You feel terrible because people think you forget out of carelessness or that you weren’t paying attention, but literally your brain finds a pocket of dank-ass fog and stays there.” Sojourner fidgets with one of the braids by her face. “That’s when the mean voice kicks in, saying a buncha crap that you know isn’t true…”

“But it’s loud as hell.” Lucifer says quietly, his shoulders rising up around his angelic face. What is he doing? Why is he even entertaining this? “It’s a different voice than anyone I know, but it’s so unrelenting.”

Sojourner nods, “Keeps you up at night, makes you space out during the day.” She lists off.

Rubbing his arm anxiously, “It’s the loudest when I’m with Charlie.” Lucifer admits sadly. “I can barely hear her half the time.”

The bear sighs sympathetically, “I noticed that you tune in and out of the conversations, even though you try really hard to stay present.” She swivels on the barstool, “It’s a really difficult thing to do when you’re deep in a valley.”

Finally turning around, Lucifer looks at Sojourner curiously. “A valley?” He walks back to the bar, fiddling with the top button on his pink vest. “What do you mean?”

“It’s a term one of my psych books uses to describe the highs and lows of intensity when dealing with mental illness.” Sojourner explains, relieved that the king is listening. “Peaks are when the illness isn’t so debilitating and necessary tasks like hygiene and maintaining a regular sleep schedule are more manageable to accomplish.” 

She holds her hand above her head then dips it low to her belly in a wave motion. “Valleys are when the mental illness makes everything extremely difficult to handle and that’s when a lot of side effects like brain fog, insomnia, and executive dysfunction come into play.” The sailor continues, keeping her voice thoughtful and soft. “Even brushing your teeth or eating a small meal can take all the energy you have for the day.”

Glowing porcelain skin flushes gold, ‘Has she been stalking me? Does she somehow know Belphegor?’ Lucifer looks away in embarrassment, struggling to think of something to say.

Sojourner notices his withdrawal and quickly diffuses, “At least in my experience in dealing with my mental illnesses! It is a different experience for each individual and absolutely nothing to be ashamed about!” She smiles warmly at Lucifer, “Millions of people handle their mental illnesses in the way that works for them.”

Sad, yellow eyes look up into red and green ones, “What if…what if I- someone doesn’t know how to… to handle it?” The king rubs his neck, embarrassed, “What if they’re just barely making it each day?”

The sailor looks at the angel, thinking of her next words carefully, “Well, first off, kudos to the person who gets up and makes it work despite how they’re really feeling. That is one of the hardest things to do.” She snaps her fingers in appreciation. “Secondly, does this person want to adjust how they’re handling their difficulties with mental illness?”

Lucifer blushes harder, deeply appreciating the approach the sinner is taking for him. “Uh… ye-yes. I think they really want to.” He answers quietly.

Sojourner smiles, “Well, kudos again!” Snapping her fingers in applause. “If this person is comfortable doing so, I think it would be beneficial for this individual to find someone they trust and start talking to them. Go over thoughts, feelings, and behaviors they want to gradually adjust so they can have a healthier lifestyle.” 

The king crosses his arms and shifts from one foot to the other, deep in thought. This sinner is an odd one, she clearly knows that Lucifer is talking about himself, why won’t she just come out and say it? Why isn’t she making fun of him for having these… these human problems? He’s a king! Kings don’t show this kind of weakness, especially to their subjects. But this bear, she doesn’t seem to care about his title. Which is kinda…nice?

Lucifer clears his throat, “Out of curiosity, say this individual is supposed to be a very powerful figure, with a very important job to do. Would the person they chose to talk to understand this and not judge them for having these issues?”

Sojourner frowns, “If they did, then that person should stop speaking to them immediately.” Her fist tightens, “They are supposed to be someone who is trustworthy, they shouldn’t care about the job or title, they should care about the person.” Lucifer’s chest tightens as he looks up at the sailor, “Mental illness doesn’t discriminate, therefore no one should be judged for it. Especially if that person is trying to help themselves.”

This is…new. Lucifer never thought anyone would be like this that wasn’t a close friend or family. Congo, no, Sojo is a sinner, aren’t all sinners supposed to be awful and selfish? What is this bear’s deal? “Do you really believe that?” He asks, quietly.

“To the depths of my soul, Skipper.” Sojourner answers, firmly. “I’ve dealt with too many people who tried to punish me for finally taking care of myself and now those people don’t have access to me.” She retwists the braid that became undone. “You will never be wrong for wanting to take care of yourself. There are incorrect ways of going about it, but wanting to be healthy never is. At least, that’s what I believe and the people who love you will believe that too.”

The King of Hell stares in awe of the small bear, moved by her sincerity. Would it be so bad trying to change for the better? Doesn’t he deserve that? Doesn’t Charlie deserve that? “Sojo, will you…” He can’t believe he’s doing this, asking a sinner for help. “Will you please help me?” 

The sailor smiles, “You do understand that I’m not a licensed therapist, right? I don’t have all the answers, but we can figure it out together.” Her heart swells at the request.

Lucifer nods, “Honestly, if you were a therapist and you were sent down here, I probably wouldn’t ask.” 

Sojourner slaps the surface of the bar and cackles loudly, “Fuckin’ facts! That’s what I’ve been saying since forever! Might run into a Hannibal Lecter or a Dr. Strange.” She giggles.

A wide grin spreads across Lucifer’s beautiful face, he begins to laugh. “Who? What kind of name is Dr. Strange?”

“Oh my gosh, they’re crazy fictional characters!” Sojourner starts explaining as the king rejoins her at the bar.

The new friends talk all night, insomnia is gonna keep them up anyways.

Notes:

And that kiddos is how Sojo became the Devil's therapist. Sometimes it helps to know you're not alone on the struggle bus.

Chapter 69: The Devil’s Advocate

Summary:

Michael is all set for his special assignment and is feeling super excited and confident about his trip, the author said sarcastically. Lucifer enthusiastically engages in improvement without any encouragement or support, the author said just as sarcastically!

Notes:

Yoooooo what up! A bitch is on vacaaaation!! But of course I wouldn’t forget about my lovely readers! Enjoy!

Date: May 03, 2026

Age: Ancient

Location: Angelic Embassy- Heaven Side

Weather: Pretty nice for now at least

Current Conditions: Keeping shit together with prayer and scotch tape

“Michael, breathe you’re going to love her!” Emily quips as the warrior stands at complete attention beside his luggage. “She is the same height as me and loves rainbows and ice cream and koalas! Oh, and she’s going to love your new haircut-”

Abel grabs his girlfriend’s hand, “I think he gets it, honey.” He laughs as she bounces in place. “Michael, if she’s anything like Emily, then you already have a friend down there! Plus, you can call us anytime!”

“Oh! And send us pictures, I really want to see how the new hotel looks!” The Joy Seraphim adds. “I bet it looks regal and beautiful.”

“It is an unholy structure that houses delusional murders.” Lute spits, rubbing the junction where her prosthetic arm meets her flesh. 

Sera steps up beside the head exorcist, “Captain, I expect your most professional behavior during this endeavor, otherwise I will have you reassigned, understood?” She asks firmly. 

Quietly seething, Lute looks away, “Of course, Your Majesty.” Her chest burns with anger. As much as she hates it, the angel abstains from arguing, knowing that this is a Divine Order. ‘How could Abel be so willing to work with his father’s murderers? Lord Michael living under the same roof of those that killed so many of my sisters that he fought beside for three years?’ She can’t handle it and excuses herself as overwhelming emotions take over. Sera nods understandingly, knowing how difficult this still is for her. 

The commander has her hands full refilling the ranks of her lost sisters and training the new recruits. It gives Sera a sinking feeling in her gut knowing how vulnerable Heaven is right now. Between Michael being away on this assignment and their secret army down by 60%, the safety of Paradise hangs in the balance, especially now that Hell knows that angels can be killed and have an abundance of weapons to smite their greatest warrior. ‘Please, Lord God, watch over Michael and keep him safe as he ventures into the pits of darkness.’ Sera prays, fighting back her own doubt and fears.

Despite Abel’s and Emily's enthusiasm, Michael stares blankly into space, replaying his talk with Azrael from earlier this morning. 

____________

0548, Holy Warrior’s Training Ground

Sera’s order of banning Azrael being alone with Michael was overruled when it came to training, that was another order from On High and no one could argue against it.

It was a brutal session, but not enough that made the warrior angel vomit from overstress again, Azrael knew not to push it that far. 

The Angel of Death circles his small brother who stands at attention, heavy black boots thump against the marble floor, thump, thump, thump.

“Sound off, what is your purpose?” Azrael’s low, smoky voice asks.

“To be the sword of our Heavenly Father, to strike down any threat to our home and the souls that are left in our charge.” Michael fights through his growing panic, he hates these mantras. 

“Whom do you obey?” Azrael asks, continuing his slow circles around his smaller brother. Thump, thump, thump.

”Our Heavenly Father, and all who have been ordained from On High to relay His blessed word. Azrael, Gabriel, Raphael, Sera.” ‘Stay calm, it’s almost over.’ Michael coaches himself.

”Whom do you trust?” Azrael continues, his eyes glower at his brother.  

”Azrael, Gabriel, Raphael, Sera, those who are ordained to carry out our Heavenly Father’s commands.” A drop of sweat drips into golden eyes, stinging them harshly.

“Does your existence belong to you?” The question carries so much animosity.

“No sir.” Michael answers.

“Are decisions yours to make?” 

“No sir.”

“What happens if you stray?” Azrael’s voice lowers to a threat as he speaks directly into the listening ear.

“I will be struck down and damned for all eternity. The same fate as the original sinner, Lucifer Morningstar.” Michael’s voice almost catches before he can finish his sentence.

The boots stop, “You have been given an important duty, Michael, you are the Evening Star and the Spear of Heaven. Father has crowned you these titles due to your obedience and knowing what is right and wrong.” Azrael stands tall over his brother, looking down on him. “And now you have been chosen to go down into the pits of Hell and determine if this means of redemption is possible.”

A harsh tremor trails down Michael’s frame. “Yes, sir.” He swallows hard, his stomach churning.

“Where you are going, weakness will get you killed. You will be surrounded by loathsome, evil sinners, who want to see your demise and now have the means of doing so.” Azrael leans down into Michael’s face, looking for signs of fear. “You will be completely alone in this holy endeavor; you cannot afford any missteps, lest you wish to leave Heaven vulnerable.”

“I understand, sir.”

“He will be there, he will feel your presence the moment you step foot in his domain. Do not forget that he is no longer Samael, he is Lucifer Morningstar, the one who doomed humanity. Evil incarnate, the one who lies.”

______________

1424, Kiss from a Rose Flowers and Nursery

“Skipper, I’m in the middle of a job. If you want some donuts, go see if Eggy has any!” Sojourner pinches the phone between her ear and shoulder, listening to Lucifer argue back. “Well, you need to go on a walk today anyway, it’s on your list: 30 minutes of outdoor time.” More protesting and whining is heard on the other line, “Then take Niffty or someone else with you, knock out two tasks at once: outside time and building bonds, come on, now!” 

She looks around the deep foliage of the plant nursery, hearing an ominous hiss. “No, I’m at work. I cannot be the only one besides Charlie and Vaggie that you hang out with.” A loud whine erupts from the phone, “Stop whining and go do your tasks! I’ll see you later! What? No, I’m not mad, I’m just busy! Hasta la bye, bye!” Sighing, Sojourner places her phone back into Hot Mic and pulls out her flathead screwdriver as a weapon, swearing to herself that she will never take on a job here again, this sucks.

____________

1426, Heaven Embassy, Hell Side Lobby

“Oh my gosh, Vaggie, can you believe that Heaven actually wants to send an advocate to study the hotel?” Charlie asks, excitedly bouncing as she holds her girlfriend’s hand. 

Vaggie forces her best smile in support of her princess, “Yeah, babe. I’m still a little worried, they gave us such short notice.” Her inward panic climbs as she tries to guess which person Heaven decided to send down here. What if they’re really a Trojan Horse? What if this is a ploy that puts them all in danger?

Charlie kisses Vaggie’s eye and gently holds her face, “I’ll admit it caught me by surprise too when they called us this morning, but for the sake of Hell, we have to give this a try.” She brushes silver-white hair away from Vaggie’s beautiful face, “If this all goes well, extermination will be a thing of the past for good!”

The former exorcist sighs, reeling in her anxiety. She wants to have the same hope that Charlie has, but something in her gut tells her there’s more at play. When it comes to Heaven, there always is. At this point, the angel can only pray that their new guest is someone who is open minded and sees the best in sinners as well. If she’s being honest, Vaggie hopes it’s Emily.

A bright flash of light illuminates the room the women stand in as the elevator doors open. The silhouette of a lithe being steps out of the doorway as the golden gates close behind them. Blinking the blindness out of their eyes, Charlie and Vaggie look at the face of their new guest. Vaggie’s mouth drops in shock and horror, ‘Him? They sent him?!’

Ahem. “Hello, I’m Michael Eveningstar.” The small angel stands before his niece and looks up. ‘She looks just like Sam- Lucifer.’

Charlie stands in stunned silence, this is not who she expected at all, “Y-you…you look just like my dad.” She stammers, taking in all his features. “Same hair, same height, same face…”

Michael nods stiffly, “That makes sense, we’re twins.”

Nodding just as stiffly, Charlie says lightly, “Oh, well that explains that.” Her eyes roll into the back of her head and she drops. 

Both Vaggie and Michael scream at the same time, “CHARLIE!” Successfully catching her before she hits the floor. The two angels stare at the princess and then at each other. Vaggie clears her throat, praying he doesn’t recognize her. “Sir.” She nods, respectfully.

Returning the nod, “Lieutenant.” Michael replies. ‘Shit, she remembers me.’

Fuck, this is awkward.

____________________

It’s a silent car ride back, Charlie sits slumped over Vaggie’s shoulder as she holds her head steady. Michael doesn’t know where to look in the limo, his golden eyes dart nervously back and forth as he twiddles his thumbs. 

The car hits a pothole and jostles the passengers inside, Charlie springs up with a gasp. “Huh? Where? Baby, I just had the craziest dream. We were at the Heaven Embassy and my dad came down, but it wasn’t my dad…” 

“It was his twin brother, Lord Michael?” Vaggie finishes, wiping drool off her girlfriend’s chin.

Yellow eyes grow huge, “Yes! Did we have the same dream?” Charlie asks, astounded.

Fighting back a laugh, Vaggie shakes her head, “No, honey. It was real.” She points across the limo to the archangel. Charlie turns to see her uncle smile awkwardly and give her a small wave.

“Dad has a twin…” The princess says, breathlessly. “And you’re sitting here in front of me.” Michael nods, unsure of what to say, this is a lot for everyone. Charlie stares at him, mouth agape, every emotion crossing her sweet face. “I-I didn’t know you existed.”

Michael grimaces, “I recently found out about you, too.” He confesses, “Understandably, your dad and I haven’t spoken in a while.” Heat explodes in his chest at the mention of his twin brother, his leg begins to bounce as his hands squeeze together. Tears spring to Charlie’s eyes as she sniffles, Vaggie and Michael each sit up with concern. “Did I say something wrong? I’m sorry!” The archangel immediately apologizes.

Charlie shakes her head, wiping her eyes. “No, no, I’m sorry! I’m just so happy, I don’t know what to do!” She sobs in her hands. Vaggie pulls her in for a hug, letting her weep on her shoulder. “I- I already love you so much!” The princess cries harder.

A painful squeeze seizes Michael’s heart, this is the offspring of Lucifer and Lilith? This undeniably sweet, loving girl? How is she so pure? So accepting? He figured Lucifer would’ve told her everything and she would hate him on the spot. They’ve barely known each other for 10 minutes and already she’s told him that she loves him.

“I…I love you, too, Charlie.” The young woman leaps across and pulls him into a bone-crushing hug, crying into his platinum blond hair. Stunned for a brief moment, Michael cautiously places his hands on his niece’s back. She squeezes tighter, he relaxes into the hugs and wraps his arms around his new family. 

“I love you, too.”

Notes:

Awww, first impressions are always the best….right? So are reunions! ….Guys?

Chapter 70: Oh, Brother

Summary:

After a lovely outing, Alastor takes it upon himself to ruin it for everyone. Sending Lucifer into emotional distress just in time for Charlie and Vaggie to bring their special guest home.

Notes:

Part two of the update! I’ll add my Bluesky profile to show off the gift I made for Christian Borle, Vox’s voice actor, later.

Date: May 03, 2026

Age: Ancient Man Baby King

Location: Good as Hell Bakery

Weather: Pretty good

Current Conditions: Came for a donut, stayed for the vibes

There are many hardships to being King of Hell: the politics, the meetings, the decisions, not to mention the stress! On the same note, there are huge perks to being king as well. For example, people just give you stuff for free, like delicious desserts and getting to lick the spoon much like Lucifer doing as he kicks his feet happily sitting on the stool in Eggy’s kitchen. 

When he had asked Husk to accompany him to the bakery, the king didn’t expect the entire hotel to demand that they come with them. Even Alastor wanted to tag along after tasting the confectioner’s espresso chocolate. Now everyone was in Eggy’s kitchen participating in an impromptu bonding activity, learning how to make donuts and creme brûlée .

Niffty excitedly reaches for the blowtorch that thankfully Angel holds high above her reach, the last thing anyone wants is for the manic maid to get a hold of another blowtorch. “King! It’s your turn to dip the donuts!” Eggy waves him over with a bright smile. Grinning, Lucifer places the ‘clean’ spoon in the sink and rolls his sleeves up, excited to roll his apple donuts into the cinnamon sugar mix. 

By the time all was baked and done, the hotel waved goodbye with three boxes full of sweets and Eggy was armed with Alastor’s beignet recipe, ready for a blowout sale tomorrow. “Tell Honey Bear and my Suga Peas, I said hello!” The chef calls after them, the group clamors in agreement.

“Do ya think Charlie and Vaggie will be upset we kinda spoiled dinner eating all these sweets?” Angel ponders out loud as they cross the threshold of the hotel.

“Nah, we brought them more cupcakes and pan ducting, I’m sure they’ll be fine.” Cherri shrugs, nonchalantly.

Adjusting his glasses, “It’s pronounced pan dulce, Cherri” Baxter corrects, “It’s a popular dessert in Latino culture.” The scientist scrapes the bottom of his dirt cup as he finishes off his chocolate treat.

Rolling her one eye, Cherri scoffs, “Yeah, that. We brought them that.”

Lucifer stretches and sighs, happy, but tired from his day out. “I’ll be in my room if anyone needs me, I’m gonna give Charlie a call.”

“Charlie is currently at the Heaven Embassy, sire.” Alastor quipped, looking at his nails, “She and Vagatha are currently transporting our new guest back to the hotel.”

The room pauses, what did Alastor just say? 

“Smiles, what the hell are you talking about?” Angel chuckles humorlessly, “Whaddaya mean the Heaven Embassy? Why would we get a guest from there?” 

Inspecting his sleeves, Alastor gives a cheeky grin, “Oh, did I forget to mention? Our dear princess received very exciting news from a lovely young lady; Emily, I believe her name was and she explained that after our victory with the exorcists, Heaven would like to investigate the hotel.” Tucking his arm behind his back, he continues. “They want to send a representative to study the processes of this fine establishment and see if it is worthwhile to invest in Charlie’s endeavor.”

The king’s blood runs cold, “AND YOU’RE JUST MENTIONING THIS NOW?” Anger drips off each word, “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?” He snarls, flames leaping from his razor sharp teeth.

“Do forgive me, your majesty. It must’ve slipped my mind,” Alastor bats his eyes innocently. “It was all so sudden, what with this all being last minute. Before the ladies left, I was tasked to prepare a suite for our special guest.” The red demon dusts off his sleeve, “I went above and beyond getting the room situated and lost track of time. It was past lunch when I went back downstairs and came across this impromptu field trip to Eggy’s bakery.” A mischievous grin spreads across his tan-gray skin, “I was enjoying myself so much that I had forgotten all~ about it!” Alastor gives an over exaggerated bow. “Again, please forgive me.”

Lucifer can’t decide if he’s more livid or anxious as intense pressure builds in his chest, “Why didn’t she tell me?” He mutters quietly, hurt settling on his face.

Angel frowns, seeing the sudden shift in the king’s mood. “Hey, you know how excited Charlie gets! She probably ran out the door without thinkin’.” The film star suggests sympathetically. “Hell, the last time she went there, she literally sang and danced all the way there!” Husk and Niffty nod in agreement.

“No, no, Charlie did try to tell him.” Alastor clarifies, “In fact, you were the first one she ran to. Unfortunately, his majesty was still sleeping until late this morning!” The Radio Demon relishes in the devastation on Lucifer’s face. “So, our darling princess chose to let you rest, what with your poor sleeping habits and all.”

Cherri growls, “Hey fuck off, dickhead! You know he has insomnia!” Furious that Alastor would throw Lucifer’s condition in his face like that. “Oy, King, don’t listen to him, I know Charlie is pumped that you’re sleeping betta. Sojo, too!” Husk and Angel glower at the red demon, appalled by his behavior.

The room becomes suddenly too stifling, the fallen angel can feel his body start to heat up. “Oh, don’t worry about me, I know this prick is just trying to get under my skin!” He did and Lucifer hates him for it. “I’m going to freshen up before our guest arrives, excuse me!” With a snap of his fingers, the king disappears in a poof!

“You’re a real piece a shit, ya know that?” Angel snaps, glaring at Alastor. “Whatcha do that for? We all just had a nice afta-noon togetha, ya didn’t need to spoil it like that!”

Sneering evilly, Alastor purrs, “I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about. All I did was inform his majesty of his daughter’s whereabouts. Something he should’ve already known as her father, but I digress.”

“Bullshit! You knew what you were doin’! Ya waited until he was happy to wreck his mood again!” Cherri snaps, stomping her foot. “Go play in traffic, ya red cunt!”

Satisfied that he upset the room, Alastor twirls his cane and smiles brightly, “I’ll be sure to put that on my list! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must-” The front doors open, Vaggie walks in dragging behind a blue suitcase, while Charlie walks hand-in-hand with… her dad?

“And we just put up an exercise area around the back! A track and obstacle course and tires for some reason!” Charlie chatters excitedly. The Lucifer doppelgänger just nods and smiles warmly, pure affection on his face.

The hotel residents stare in shock before looking to Vaggie for an explanation. The guardian doesn’t meet anyone’s gaze, her own state of shock evident on her face.

Charlie guides the stranger to the center of the room, “And this is everyone!” She flares her arm to the room. “This is Niffty, our housekeeper, Baxter, a guest, Husk, our front desk manager and barkeeper.” They all stare wide-eyed at the visitor. “Then we have Cherri Bomb, Angel Dust, and last, but certainly not least, Alastor!” A tense smile stretches the deer demon’s mouth.

Placing both hands on the copy’s shoulders, Charlie introduces him, “Everyone, this my Uncle Michael Eveningstar! Dad’s twin!” She hugs the short man tightly, squishing her face to his. “Can you guys believe how amazing this is?! I have an uncle!!” Her yellow eyes sparkle with love and excitement. 

A chuckle of disbelief leaves Angel’s chest, “Michael? As in the Archangel Michael?”

Clearing his throat nervously, the archangel nods. “Yes, that is correct.”

“Like from the Bible? That Michael?” Angel clarifies further, leaning forward. He cannot believe what he’s seeing right now.

“Very loosely, but yes.” Michael nods again, unsure where this is going. Personally, he didn’t appreciate how the ‘scriptures’ depict him, he doesn’t believe he’s anything like how the texts describe him.

“Well, shit. Nice to meet ya, King Twin.” Angel purrs, wiggling his eyebrows at him. Michael flushes gold at the unexpected flirt. Husk swats him with a dish towel, a warning growl low in his throat. Angel laughs, “Sorry, Whiskers, I was just teasin’.” He leans over the bar to plant a kiss on his boyfriend’s cheek. 

Cackling excitedly, Niffty runs and climbs up Michael to stare him directly in the eye. “Oh, ho, ho! A really bad boy! You smell clean!” 

“Uh…thank you?” Michael is terrified to move, this is the sinner that killed Adam.

Charlie chuckles nervously, “Sorry, Uncle Mike.” She plucks Niffty off of him. “She likes strong men.” Explaining, awkwardly.

“Niffty.” Vaggie scolds, rolling her eye before turning to Alastor, “Is the room ready?” He doesn’t answer, his smile is an upturned snarl as red eyes bore onto Michael’s face, menacingly. “Alastor!” She calls again, snapping him back to the present. “Is Lor- Michael’s room ready?”

“Yes.” He hisses before quickly dissolving into the shadows. Vaggie’s eyebrows leap up, what was that about just now?

Charlie grabs her uncle’s hand and pulls him to the elevator, “C’mon Uncle Mike, after you get settled, we can have a treat! Those are from Eggy’s right?” She points at the white dessert boxes, her mouth already watering. 

“Sure are! We paid her a visit and ended up learnin’ how to make donuts and crème brûlée.” Husk grins as he pours Angel a drink. “Oh, and Eggy says “Hi, sweet peas.”.” Passing on the confectioner’s message.

Charlie beams, “Oh, I love her so much!” She bounces on her toes as Vaggie pulls Michael’s luggage onto the elevator with them. “We’ll see you guys so-” The doors close. The lobby is silent as the reality settles in for everyone.

“Someone…someone should warn the king.” Baxter finally speaks up. 

“Not it!” Husk, Cherri, and Angel shout at the same time, all touching their noses. The scientist flails before touching the center of his face, saying the same.

Waving her hand happily, Niffty chirps, “I’ll tell King Bad Boy!” She runs off, giggling.

Chasing after the tiny woman, Baxter calls to her, “No, not you, Niffty!”

___________

The Apple Suite

“10,18,27,33,40,48…” Lucifer counts while crossing his arms over his chest. He slowly paces around the room, gently tapping his shoulders in an irregular pattern: left hand two taps, right hand one; right hand two taps, left hand one. The combination of the complicated tasks help keep his mind from going into the “lost woods” as Sojourner calls it. 

“Smell the flowers, blow away the leaves.” The king hears her voice in his head. He takes a deep breath and slowly blows it out, imaging autumn leaves scattering along a sidewalk. This is working, the anxiety is quieting down. “Smell the flowers, blow away the leaves.” Lucifer coaches himself as he continues his tapping and counting, he stops when he counts past his first triple digit. 

“Check-in with yourself. Are you safe?” 

The fallen angel nods, “Yes, I am safe.”

“Can you hear your own voice?”

Lucifer is silent for several moments, tuning into himself. He doesn’t hear the voice that speaks harshly in his mind. “I can hear my own voice.” He cycles another deep breath.

“Is this a real problem or a projection?”

Recalling the cruel words Alastor spoke to him, Lucifer is in a much better mindset to really analyze what happened. “It is a projection.” He confirms to himself, uncrossing his arms and stretching them above his head. “Charlie knows about my insomnia and wants me to get adequate rest. She doesn’t mind if I sleep different hours than everyone else.” 

The memory of him, Charlie, Sojourner sitting at the kitchen table that late night pops to the forefront of his mind. With his new friend’s support, Lucifer was able to tell his daughter how much he has been struggling with his mental health. After hours of crying, Charlie and Lucifer are now on a regime to relearn each other and rebuild a new foundation of family.

The angel picks up a rubber duck and squeezes it, a soft burst of air puffs out silently. Man, Sojourner was right again, he is thankful he made a quiet ducky for stress. Feeling much better, Lucifer snaps his fingers, the apple sign hanging outside his door changes from a core to a full apple.  He really likes all these subtle signs Sojourner suggested to let people know how he’s feeling. Whole apple means good, bitten apple means he needs a few minutes to himself, half eaten means he’s having a hard time, and the empty core means he’s not doing well and only Sojourner or Charlie can come in with permission. 

Rapid knocking interrupts Lucifer’s thoughts as he turns to the door. ‘Who could that be?’ He wonders as his full attire magicks on with a snap of his fingers. Approaching the door, the king hears manic giggling and approaching footsteps. “What the?” He answers the door. Niffty stands there, smiling wildly as she bounces on her dainty toes. “Uh~, Misty? Can I help you with something?” Lucifer asks with an awkward smile.

“Niffty, let Charlie tell him that his brother’s her- Oh!” Baxter stops mid-stride and mid-sentence, realizing the king already answered the door. 

The tiny maid stomps her foot, “Baxter, you spoiled it! I wanted to tell King Bad Boy!” She crosses her arms and pouts at the scientist. 

The same scientist stares at the ruler of Hell, his blood running cold. “Y-your Majesty.” He stammers, bowing to him. “Good day!” He chuckles as his shoulders bunch up near his face and his hands tuck behind his back.

Burning red eyes, stare at the angler fish, making the poor sinner sweat buckets instantly. “Boxer, ha, ha, who did my daughter bring back here?” The pleasant, rich voice is too pleasant, almost threateningly so.

Baxter clears his throat twice. “Uh, um, your br-brother? Sire?” His nasally voice gets quieter with each syllable.

Lucifer chuckles lightly, okay so he wasn’t  going crazy when he heard him just now. “My brother. Which brother, Bunson?” His eyes glow red as an ominous shadow settles on his porcelain skin.

Intense fear and dread seize Baxter at his core, how did he mess up so badly? All he wanted to do was stop Niffty. “Y-y-your-” He stammers.

“Dad! Perfect, I was just coming to get you!” Charlie jogs down the hallway, waving happily. Baxter nearly cries in relief, thanking the gods for the princess.

Lucifer’s face immediately lightens up, “Hi sweetie, whatcha need?” He asks, brightly. His gut turns, already knowing what she’s grabbing him for. 

Finally catching up to the small group, the princess smiles happily at the two residents, “Hi Baxter, hi Niffty! Mind if I borrow my dad?” She asks, cheerfully.

“By all means!” Baxter exclaims, lifting Niffty above his head and taking off down the hallway.

Charlie blinks after them, “Huh, that was weird. But dad, I have a surprise for you~!” She dances on her toes, “Come with me!” Not waiting for an answer, Charlie grabs her father’s hand and pulls him down the hallway to the opposite side of the hotel.

Lucifer holds onto his hat as he lets his daughter drag him, “A-a surprise, honey? What k-kind of surprise?” He can’t keep the anxiety out of his voice.

“We got some exciting news from Heaven and I wanted to make sure you had your full hours of sleep to tell you and-” She pauses in front of a door, hearing the strain in his voice. “Wait, dad, are you okay? How’s your apple?” She leans down to his face with concern.

Lucifer feels his face heat up, his heart beat quickens with nervousness, “I’m okay! I’m great!”

Charlie frowns softly, “Honesty, dad. How’s your apple?” Placing a supportive hand on his shoulder.

Ashamed his fib was so easily caught, the king looks away, “Lots of bites taken out of it.” He admits quietly.

Charlie’s heart clenches, ‘I messed up, I should’ve checked in with him first!’ She scolds herself. “Thank you for telling me, let’s go back to your room and tal-” The door opens, Michael stands wide-eyed in the doorway, staring at his exiled twin brother.

“Uncl-” The door closes. The archangel looks off to the side. He hallucinated just now, that was crazy. Opening the door, he sees his brother and niece again, “Micha-” the door closes. Okay, a very persistent hallucination, that happens sometimes, it’s cool.

Charlie blinks, “Huh, so I get that from your side of the family then.” She looks down at her dad. The king is frozen like a statue, processing the sight of his estranged twin. Dread fills Charlie’s heart, ‘I should’ve prepared them first.’

Michael feels his body go numb, “Maybe if I don’t move, they’ll disappear.” He mumbles to himself as he waits patiently for the imaginary figures to go away. There’s a polite knock on the door. “YEs?” His voice cracks terribly. AHEM! “Yes?” Michael answers smartly. 

“Uncle Mike? Are you okay?” It’s Charlie’s voice. That’s so weird, hallucinations can’t knock on doors, at least Michael thinks they can’t. “Yes, I’m fine.” He answers automatically.

Charlie winces, “Are you really fine or just giving me an answer?”

Oof, that question puts him on the spot, is he that obvious? “Weakness will get you killed.” Azrael’s voice repeats in his head. Taking a steadying breath, Michael opens the door, looking up at his beloved niece. “Yes, I’m perfectly fine.” He says confidently, “Don’t worry about me.” Locking eyes with his twin, Michael keeps his voice steady, “Hello, Lucifer.”

Narrowing his red eyes, Lucifer pulls back his shoulders, “Michael. Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel.” He summons his cane and places his hands on top.

“Thank you.” Michael replies calmly. “I look forward to my stay.”

“Likewise.” Lucifer replies coldly.

Oh, brother, here we go.

Notes:

Dear lord, here we go. Everyone strapped in? Five point harness on?

Chapter 71: Thicker than Water

Summary:

The twins are back together, after an eternity apart and the last time wasn’t as sweet as it could’ve been. Well, hey brother, how’s it going?

Notes:

Last update! Have fun, y’all.

 

Date: May 03, 2026

Age: Ancient

Location: Hazbin Hotel- Michael’s Room

Weather: Well, it’s nice outside.

Current Conditions: Family reunion! Yaaaayy… ugh, fuck.

Charlie looks between the two brothers and clears her voice awkwardly. “Uuh…um.” Fuck, she has no idea what to say, the tension is horrendous. “Well, this is cool, huh? A little family reunion?” She loses steam watching her dad and uncle stand like statues, neither blinking nor moving a muscle. “May-maybe we can-” She begins to suggest.

“Ducky? Do you mind excusing us for a few minutes? Your uncle and I just wanna talk privately real quick.” Lucifer turns to his daughter with the sweetest, warmest smile in his eyes and face. Charlie looks at her father then to her uncle, who wears the same serene smile. It’s uncanny how exactly alike they look when they smile, identical twins indeed. 

“Oh, okay.” She finally answers slowly, unsure if she should leave the two of them alone. “If- uh, you need me, I’ll be right downstairs.” The princess points behind her as she tentatively backs away. “Have a nice talk, you two. I love you!”

“I love you, too, sweetie.” Both men speak at the same time, their voices blending into one. “I’ll see you soon!” Charlie blinks, shocked. That is crazy, they’re already so in sync. With one last wave, the princess heads back downstairs. Lucifer waits until his daughter turns the corner before looking back at his twin, the icy stare he receives holds nothing but contempt and anger. Good, at least they’re on the same page.

“Are you going to let me in?” Lucifer asks, tapping his fingers on his apple cane impatiently.

“Since when do you ask permission for anything?” Michael retorts, leaving the door open as he walks to the couch in front of the unlit fireplace. Ignoring the remark, Lucifer steps in and closes the door, locking it behind him so they don’t get any unwelcome guests. Sitting down on the blue couch, Michael crosses his arms and legs, waiting for his brother to take a seat in the armchair across from him. Lucifer stands next to it, waiting with an unreadable expression. “What are you doing?” Michael asks, confused by his behavior.

“I’m waiting to be offered a seat.” Lucifer replies coyly. “I’m not a rude guest.”

“Oh, for the love of…” Michael fights not to roll his eyes at his brother’s petty behavior. “Please take a seat Lucifer.” Gesturing to the armchair. 

The king rests his cane on the armrest and snaps his coat and hat away before taking a seat. The way his anxiety is spiking, he’ll sweat through all his clothes before they can make any progress. Lacing his fingers together, Lucifer sits tall in the chair with both his feet planted firmly on the ground. Projecting a regal essence about him, Lucifer opens his mouth to speak. “How ar-” He starts.

“I’m under orders to come investigate the hotel.” Michael interrupts, cutting straight to the chase. “Heaven would like to see if redemption is possible and since I’m the one who judges souls, it was a unanimous decision that I should be the one to go.” 

Lucifer fights to keep his face neutral, already pissed that Michael interrupted him. “I’m doing great, so kind of you to ask. Charlie? Oh, she’s about 209 years old, isn’t she just the picture of beauty?” He asks, not bothering to keep the sarcasm out of his tone. “Most people start off with a greeting before bulldozing straight to business. Tell your handlers to work with you on that the next time you see them.” He spits. 

Michael’s fingers dig into his arm, clutching the rich, blue fabric of his shirt. “Don’t start with me, Lucifer. I’m not in the mood to waste time playing your games.” His heavy eyebrows narrow. “I’m here on official business from Heaven and would like to get started as soon as possible.”

Lucifer’s nostrils flare, “Oh, of course, how silly of me! It’s not like we haven’t seen each other in two millennia! Let’s not bullshit around, I’d hate to keep you from your cozy life up in Puffy Cloud Town!” He waves off his brother and turns sideways in his seat. Crossing his arms and hastily tossing one leg over the other. “I’m sure you’re very busy with your gym schedule and parading around Heaven like some goddamn hero!”

A golden eye twitches, “What the hell are you talking about? I don’t parade around anywhere! I’m extremely busy wi-” Michael argues.

“Oh please, what else would you have to do besides walking around Heaven so everyone can kiss your ass? ‘There goes Michael, the Spear of Heaven!’ ‘Oh, look it’s Michael, the vanquisher of evil!’ ‘Hey Michael, good job stabbing your own brother in the back!’.” Lucifer’s mocking rant ends with him gripping the armrest and leaning forward with a snarl.

Michael’s mouth falls open, “Stabbed you in the back? STABBED YOU IN THE BACK? I’M NOT THE ONE WHO GAVE THAT FUCKING APPLE TO EVE!” Michael shouts, standing up with clenched fists. “I’M NOT THE STUPID, SELFISH PRICK THAT BETRAYED HIS FAMILY FOR A CLAY STATUE!”

Springing to his feet, Lucifer gets in Michael’s face, “DON’T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT MY WIFE LIKE THAT! YOU SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!” Flames leap from his snapping maw, his horns begin protruding from his forehead. “DON’T FORGET YOU’RE IN MY HOUSE, BITCH! YOU BETTER WATCH HOW YOU FUCKING SPEAK TO ME OR-”

“Or else what?” Michael challenges, “You’ll fight me? Go ahead and try, we both know how the last time ended!” The scars decorating the warrior’s body begin to heat up and ache. Lucifer’s face flushes gold with indignation, how dare Michael say that to him? “You haven’t changed at all! You’re still the same immature, reckless, impulsive brat that doesn’t care how his actions affect others!” Michael continues his tirade, “You never think before acting or speaking, you only care about yourself, and you never take responsibility! Hell, this hotel isn’t even your idea, it’s Charlie’s!” 

Lucifer takes a step back, his eyebrows furrowed. Guilt slams the king in his gut as he struggles for a comeback. 

“You’ve let your kingdom fall to waste as your subjects run amuck! You’ve been absent as a ruler for seven years! You left Charlie alone for seven. Whole. Years.” Michael growls, remembering what Charlie told him in the car, “You and Lilith abandoned your daughter to deal with both of your messes while you two fucked off to do who knows what. So, do not talk to me about being a king when you’re nothing but a deadbeat!” 

Tears sting at Lucifer’s eyes, the harsh words make his blood pulse in his ears. 

“Charlie is the only good thing that came about this abomination you and that woman call a marriage. And right now, her and this hotel are my main focus.” Michael pushes some of his blond hair away from his forehead, wiping the sweat that began to gather there. “She is the only hope your people have for getting extermination abolished for good and unless you’re going to help,” He walks over to the door and opens it, “Stay out of my way so that I can leave you alone faster. Now please leave, I want to settle in!”

Saying nothing, Lucifer grabs his cane and snaps his fingers, his white coat and hat reappear, “If you need anything, let me know.” He says monotone and walks out of the room. “Have a good evening, Michael.” Lucifer says calmly before walking away.

His brother is taken aback by the quiet reaction, immediately feeling regretful about his outburst. “You too.” He mutters, closing the door. Leaning against the wood, the warrior stares across the room and out the window. What in the world was that? What happened to just having a normal conversation like he planned to? Michael recalls the look on Lucifer’s face when he called him a deadbeat, his chest squeezes painfully. That was wrong, that was completely out of line for him to say. 

Wait, no. No, it wasn’t. Charlie said her mom suddenly disappeared and she could barely get ahold of her dad. She had to take on so many of their responsibilities without any information or support from any ruling power in Hell. What is that, if not a deadbeat? Michael nods to himself, convincing himself that he is correct. So, why does he still feel horrible? An awful queasy feeling flutters in his gut as he fights to push the confrontation they just had down deep inside of him.

‘Shower… I need a shower.’ He sighs to himself as he switches on the light to the grand bathroom. He sees his reflection in the mirror and immediately recoils, flicking off the light. What is wrong with him? It’s just a mirror, stop being ridiculous. Alabaster fingers sit on the light switch and linger. What’s the problem? Turn on the light, it’s just a mirror. A mirror he doesn’t want to see right now for some odd reason. ‘Maybe the size of it is too large.’ He ponders to himself. 

Snapping his fingers, the size of the massive mirror shrinks. Turning back on the light, Michael sees himself again and immediately turns the lights off. ‘Oh, it’s me. That’s the issue.’ Michael realizes and snaps his fingers once more. Turning on the light again, the mirror is gone. Sighing, Michael steps into the bathroom and runs the water, at least he can shower now. 

Dressed in a fresh pair of clothes, Michael sets to unpack his luggage when his cell phone rings. Azrael’s caller ID is displayed on the screen. Swallowing nervously, Michael answers, “Michael Eveningstar speaking.”

“Why didn’t you report when you arrived?” Azrael harshly asks.

Michael’s stomach drops, he was so taken by Charlie that he completely forgot. “I apologize Azrael, I just settled in and-”

“Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for a reply? Why can’t you follow the simplest instructions?”

The luggage will have to wait.

Chapter 72: Two of a Kind

Summary:

Michael finally meets the newest resident of the Hazbin Hotel and things go buttery smooth. Lucifer is feeling just fine after his talk with his brother. Btw I'm being VERY sarcastic.

Notes:

Yooo, had a really long weekend and I'm still recovering. But I met most of the voice actors of the Hazbin Hotel and they're just as wonderful as I anticipated!

Date: May 03, 2026 holy shit when will this day end?

Age: 7 ½ years dead

Location: Behind the Hazbin Hotel

Weather: Dude I don’t know okay, it’s been a long day

Current Conditions: Getting hosed off because you’re not bringing that nastiness inside

 

Vaggie suppresses a gag as the pungent smell floods her nostrils. “What did you say you got splashed with?”

“Piranha plant puke, HUURRK ACK! ” Sojourner dry heaves violently as Niffty hoses her off in the backyard. Angel and Cherri come out the back door with dish soap and towels. “Fuuuck, I’m never going near carnivorous plants again!” The electrician swears as she recalls the disgusting, warm interior of the plant’s mouth as it gulped her up. 

Thankfully her new friend, Violetta, was knowledgeable enough to rescue Sojourner without hurting the plant. The witchy crow sinner used a tincture that forced the plant to vomit.

The original gripe was that the sprinkler system was spotty and quickly devolved into Sojourner fighting for her afterlife when a rogue vine dragged her through the nursery into the open maw of a giant Pitcher Plant, Jumanji style. 

Needless to say, while she was successful in keeping herself from falling into the digestive juices. She had to hang onto the beast’s uvula in order to do so, causing it to vomit in its own mouth…twice. The Kiss From a Rose Flower shop offered to toss in a beautiful bouquet as an apology, but Sojourner firmly declined. Flowers are not her favorite at the moment.

“Joey, I’m sorry, but you’re gonna have to ditch ya clothes, fuck.” Cherri digresses, holding her nose as she dumps the degreasing dish soap directly on top of the bear’s braids. Pulling on the rubber gloves, Angel starts rubbing the soap in Sojourner’s hair while she scrubs her own arms and legs.

“Do you have another set of work clothes?” Vaggie asks, finally able to breathe now that the soap is taking effect. 

Kicking off her boots and shimmying off her coveralls, Sojourner nods as she turns her face towards the stream of cold water, rinsing the soap from her eyes. “Yeah, I’m gonna leave my boots in the garage after I- gurgle, choke! Niffty, I can’t breathe!” She sputters, spitting out soapy water, “Cover them in baking soda! Pffft! NIFFTY! Girl, you’re waterboarding me!” The small maid cackles loudly as she continues to spray Sojourner in the face.

After the worst of the slime was washed and thoroughly rinsed off, Sojourner carried a very pissed off Hot Mic and ruined coveralls up the stairs to her room. ‘Get in the shower, turn the water to the temperature of lava, then scrub until my skin comes off. Easy day.’ She plans to herself in a hurry to get the excess soap off of her. 

Sojourner hated being wet when she was alive and the feeling has only worsened since being covered in thick fur. With her 4c hair added to the equation, she is grateful she kept her schedule clear for tomorrow. “Uuuuugh, wash night~” She groans, already dreading the long, intricate process of doing her hair.

Reaching the top of the stairs, the sailor comes across Charlie who has fresh tears in her eyes. Mismatched eyes widen looking up at the princess, “Sugar Pea, what’s wrong?” Sojourner asks, watching Charlie wipe her yellow eyes.

Sniffling, the hellish royal answers, “H-hi Sojo! Welcome home, ho-how was your day today?” Her voice tightens as she tries to force a smile.

“Terrifying, gross, and nasty, what’s the matter?” Sojourner replies, focused on her crying friend. “Why the tears, honey?”

Charlie’s lower lip quivers as she sniffles hard, “Oh, dad just had a really bad day and he doesn’t want to be disturbed.” Another tear trickles down her cheek.“And I-I messed up really ba-a-a-ad!” She covers her face and sobs.

Sojourner’s face settles into a firm frown, “Did he lash out at you?” She asks, sternly. 

Charlie shakes her head, “No, I crossed a boundary by accident and I caused him and Uncle Mike to have a really bad fight. And I didn’t mean to word it like dad is a bad parent, I just said he was busy with urgent private matters because he’s been struggling with mental illness. And-” She starts to cry harder as her shoulders shake.

“Spiraling! You’re spiraling, bring it back in, you can do it.” Sojourner coaches, watching the princess work herself up. Charlie lowers her hands, her pretty face soaked in tears. “C’mon Charlie, smell the flowers.” The bear prompts, taking a deep breath. The princess mirrors her, inhaling slowly.

“Blow a-away the leaves.” Charlie finishes, blowing out a slow, controlled breath. The women do three more calming breaths before the princess is stable again.

Smiling warmly, “Good job, sweetheart.” Sojourner praises, softly. “How are you feeling now?” She asks, watching her friend’s face carefully.

Patting her cheeks then shaking her alabaster hands out, Charlie nods, giving one last hard exhale. “I’m okay, thank you.” She sniffs, returning the smile. “There was a miscommunication that led to a bad argument. My dad is still really upset and isn’t ready to talk yet.” Charlie looks warily down the corridor to her dad’s suite, “He tried explaining to me what happened but started panicking and apologizing for being a horrible dad.” She frowns, remembering the upsetting image of Lucifer breaking down. 

Large tears streamed down his angelic face as his strangled breathing and pained sobs still ring loudly in Charlie’s head. “I didn’t know seeing him like that would scare me so badly.” Long fingers start picking at black nails. “Then he saw how upset I was getting, which upset him more and… sigh .” Her shoulders deflated in sadness. “He curled himself up in his wings and just kept repeating ‘I’m sorry’. I told him that I love him and that I would be back.” Yellow eyes begin to water. “I shouldn’t have left him, but I didn’t know what to do.” Charlie’s breath hitches again.

Sojourner gently holds Charlie’s hands in her own soapy, soggy ones. “Nah girl, you made the right move. Y’all were feeding off either’s stress and couldn’t get a chance to calm down. You’re worried about him, he’s stressed out and worried about you, it was smart to give yourselves breathing room.” She rubs the top of Charlie’s hands with her thumbs. “Let’s give him some time to wind down and then I’ll check on him after my shower.”

Charlie nods and squeezes Sojourner’s hands, “What did I ever do before you?” She sighs with a tired smile.

“Change Hell for the better! I’ll talk to you after a bath, I’m covered in soapy grossness!” Sojourner quips, continuing to her room. 

Looking down at her own hands, Charlie scrunches her face in disgust. “Uh~, should I wash my hands?” She calls down the hallway.

“Oh, yeah, big time! ” Sojourner laughs, walking further away. “Don’t touch your face!”

“Eeeew!” The demon princess gags as she walks downstairs.

Sojourner pauses, remembering what Charlie said before her spiral. “Uncle Mike?” She mutters, looking back to where the princess left. “Hey, Char-” She turns to a door opening on her left. “…Skipper?”

The archangel was exhausted, the combo of that phone call plus his earlier conversation with his brother left Michael in a less than stellar mood. He needs to get started right away with his mission details and go ask Charlie about the hotel. Opening the door, Michael sees a soaking wet bear standing in the hallway. “Skipper?” She asks. The sinner smells like she just climbed out of a putrid river. Why is she covered in bubbles?

Studying the new guest’s features, Sojourner quickly puts two and two together. “Oh~, You must be Uncle Mike!” She deduces, “Hey, what’s up! I’m Sojourner, nice to meet you.” She waves. “I would shake your hand but…” The sailor gestures to the sludge covering her body. “Kinda nasty right now.”

“Sinners are vile, deceitful creatures, trust no one.” Azrael’s words echo in Michael’s head, “They know how to kill angels, give them no window of opportunity.” His surprised expression devolves to one of pure spite and hatred. Glaring darkly at the woman, Michael says nothing and steps around her, walking away.

Sojourner stares after the man, stunned by his response, “Damn, I didn’t think I was that nasty.” She frowns and calls after him, “Okay, awesome to meet you too, Uncle Mike .” Sarcasm emphasized on his name. The angel turns and glares at her as he continues to walk away. “Good lord, what a ‘tude.” Sojourner scoffs, continuing to her room. “What the hell is his problem?”

Finally in the privacy of her room, the bear begins the long process of washing her hair. “Maybe, he’s also upset about the argument.” She ponders to herself as she washes a section of her thick hair. “That still doesn’t make it cool for him to act like that though.” She decides to let it go, not letting others’ attitude affect her own is something she’s been diligently working on. 

After a grueling two hours, dark blue, thick coily hair is clean and pulled into a puff ponytail. ‘I’ll braid one half tonight and the other in the morning.’ Sojourner plans as she tucks the red and green wires into the puff and pulls on an oversized faded t-shirt, a worn hoodie with a broken zipper, and thin sweat pants. “Let’s see how Skipper is doing.” She says to herself as she heads to Lucifer’s room.

At the same time, Michael drags his hands down his face, exhausted. He seriously fumbled every bag today: Forgetting to call Azrael, fighting with his brother, and making his niece cry? Could today get any worse? “Real smooth, Michael. Nice.” The warrior grumbles to himself. 

It took everything in him not to panic when Charlie brought him to her office and asked about the argument. Michael still can’t get over the shame he felt when his niece asked him if he told Lucifer that she thought he was a bad parent. ‘She looked so hurt. Why did you do that?’ He chastises himself, burying his face in his hands.

“Woah, you okay?” A voice asks. Michael looks up, it’s that bear sinner again. Did she change her hair? She has a concerned look on her face, red and green eyes search his golden ones. “You good?”

“Weakness will get you killed.”

His expression turning cold, Michael looks down at her, “I’m fine.” He grunts, quickly walking past her.

“This mother-” Sojourner catches herself and throws up her hands, “Fuck it, leave ‘em. Maybe he’s cranky.” She gives up and continues to Lucifer’s room. “Rude, self-sucking, piece of-” Approaching the king’s door, Sojourner winces at the rotten apple core. “Aw, shit.” She whispers, gently knocking on the grand door. “Skipper, it’s Sojo. Are you safe?” She gets no reply. “Charlie told me you had a really hard day. It’s okay if you need the rest of the night to yourself, but for safety, I need an answer.” 

The door opens, a freezing darkness greets the bear at the entrance. ‘Yup, that’s not scary at all.’ Sojourner thinks to herself as she steps in. ‘Just go against all my black instincts and walk inside, no biggie’ Her eyes and position lights illuminate in the dark room, “Skipper? It’s hard to see where you are.” Her breath comes out in cold puffs with every word. A prism of light glows in the corner, shrouded in blankets. ‘That’s new.’ Cautiously, Sojourner tiptoes to the glowing being, stopping short of the pile of blankets. “Hey, man. What’s going on?”

“Failure. Am failure.”  An indescribable voice answers, echoing in the room.

Crouching down slowly, Sojourner asks, “Why are we a failure?” She has no idea why she’s doing this, this can get her killed.

“ Bad. Am bad. Bad king. Bad husband. Bad father. Bad brother. Bad son. ” The voice laments, “Ruin world. Ruin Heaven. Ruin daughter. Ruin wife.” There’s so much pain in its cries. 

“Is that why we think we’re a failure?” Sojourner inches closer to the glowing form. “Because of mistakes?” The wrapped figure warbles sadly and hunkers down, pulling the blankets tighter.

“Hate. All hate bad angel.” He cries miserably. “All leave bad angel.”

“You think you’re going to be alone? Do you think everyone is going to leave again?” A loud rumble vibrates Sojourner’s ribs as the holy being sobs. “Who is with you right now? What’s my name?” Another cry rattles the bear’s teeth, “C’mon Lucifer, tell me who’s with you.” She slowly crawls over to the weeping king, cautiously brushing her fingers on his shoulder.

“So…jo.” The fallen angel struggles to answer. 

“That’s right. What’s your daughter’s name?” Sojourner places a careful hand on his back.

“Char …lie.” His voice becomes a little clearer, leaning into her touch.

Nodding, the sailor continues, “What’s your favorite nickname for her?” Rubbing small circles into Lucifer’s back.

“Ducky.” He answers, his true voice coming through.

“Good job! What kind of animal is Fat Nuggets?”

“Little…pig.” Lucifer answers tiredly, the glow of inside his blankets dies down, “He belongs…to Angel Dust.” He slumps against the wall.

“That’s absolutely right. What kind of pet do I have?”

Turning to his friend, tears pour down Lucifer’s angelic face. “A tripod kitty, Captain Tailhook.” He sniffles as Sojourner pulls the blanket off his head.

“Welcome back, Skipper.” She smiles softly, catching her friend as he curls into her shoulder. “I got you, buddy.” The sailor settles down, holding Lucifer in her lap as his cries get louder. Squeezing him tight, she says quietly, “I’ll cover down.”

She holds him through sunrise.

Notes:

Sojo is a solid friend and Michael is sliding down the curve like the banana split. Hopefully, he gets his footing soon!

Chapter 73: See You Around

Summary:

The youngest Knight son has had enough of trying to appease his father and finally gets a lot off his chest.

Notes:

I'm going to post more art on Bluesky and my Twitter. I'll set up a link tree if yall wanna start following me on social media

Date: May 31, 2026

Age: 27

Location: Tokyo, Japan

Weather: Warm with a nice breeze

Current Condition: On the phone with an estranged father

 

Matthias swirled his matcha latte around in his cup, watching the bits of the Japanese treat whirlpool around before settling. He fights not to sigh as he waits for an opportunity to interrupt his dad so he can get off the phone. How much longer is this lecture going to last? He is on tour right now, he didn’t get a chance to glance at his phone all day yesterday because of two events and a festival meeting.  

The dj rolls his eyes and rests his chin on his fist, he sent Charles his birthday gift two weeks ago with a hand written card. Most people would say that that was a well thought out gift for a parent, especially when living overseas.

“You didn’t call at all yesterday. I know you’re busy, but you could have spared two minutes, Matthias.” Charles lectures, repeating the same sentence for the eighth time in the 34 minute phone call. “You know my health isn’t what it used to be and we don’t know how much longer I’m going to be around and-”

“Oh, enough! How many times are you going to use that tired line on me, dad?” Matthias snaps, fed up with the attempted guilt tripping. “If you remember or, in your case, probably not, I sent you teas, herbs, salves, and snacks that promote joint health and relaxation! I wrote you a three page letter and hand-made a birthday card that arrived two days before your birthday!” He whispers angrily as to not disturb the cafe he’s relaxing in. “I told you before how busy yesterday was, it is not my fault you didn’t bother to write down or remember or whatever.” 

The youngest Knight son excuses himself to an empty smoking room. “I called today to wish you a happy belated birthday and all you’ve done is tell what a piece of shit son I am because I have a career to do!” His anger boiling over. “A career, by the way, you mocked until I got famous! Then suddenly you’re all for DJ RipTide, you always believed in DJ RipTide, or have you heard of my son? He’s DJ RipTide! FUCK!” Matthias catches himself when he accidently raises his voice.

“Tide, I didn’t mean it li-” Charles starts, sheepishly.

“I don’t care what you meant!” The musician spits, “I’m sick of you throwing your shit health in my face to get me to do what you want!” His hands ball up in tight fists, “I know this is you still retaliating because I said I didn’t want anything to do with you before!” Matthias remembers when his sister, Queen, passed on that Charles was hoping to reconnect with his children and he vehemently said no. 

He can’t forgive how his parents behaved when Sojo died, nor how they treated his big sister when he and Cha-Cha were little kids. His dad will behave himself in front of the other siblings, but when he is alone with Matthias, a whole other person will come out. It only has gotten worse since Charles had his stroke and now has less mobility. 

“You don’t know how much longer you’ll be around, DUH! That’s how being alive works. None of us knew how long Sojo was going to be around and that didn’t stop you and mom from treating her like shit, did it?” When he doesn’t receive a response, he continues, “What you need to say is, ‘Thanks Tide, I appreciate the birthday gifts! How did you know this is my favorite tea?’ But no, you pull this crap. Happy birthday, Charles. Good bye!”

Matthias hangs up the phone, gathering his willpower not to chuck the damn thing at the wall. Is this what Sojo put up with when she was taking care of him and Cha-cha? It’s baffling that Charles behaves this way and is still shocked that Matthias doesn’t want anything to do with him. 

“He’s lucky I won’t tell the others!” The DJ crosses his arms, deep in thought. “They wouldn’t want me to deal with this for their sake, but…” Matthias pushes his fingers into the base of his thick afro and massages his scalp, groaning quietly. “I’ll talk to Queen later about it.” He decides as he heads back to where he left his things at his table, everything is as it was, undisturbed. 

Sitting down with a huff, the musician goes to pull on his headphones when he hears a polite “すみません.” (Sumimasen). Turning around, Matthias is greeted with the most beautiful woman he’s ever laid eyes on. Wearing a light pink sundress with white daisy sandals, the young woman holds up a flyer with Matthias’ face on it. “DJ RipTide?” Her light voice with her eastern accent is the loveliest sound the musician has heard. 

Standing up, Matthias places his headphones down on the table to face the woman. Tugging at his red hoodie, he chuckles bashfully. 

“Hi.” He greets.

Chapter 74: Common Ground

Summary:

Angel gets a ride from his favorite bear sinner and ends up learning a whole buncha shit about what went down with his moth of a boss. Sojo still can't seem to figure out what Michael's deal is, but she ain't gon' to let it bother her too much... maybe.

Notes:

Last update of the week, y'all already know what it is. I love your comments and your interactions as always and please share my story! I love talking to y'all. See y'all next week!

Date: June 12, 2026

Age: Died in the 1940’s

Location: A humble sex dungeon

Weather: How the fuck is he supposed to know?

Current Condition: Finally winding down after a long day

 

Hurt. Angel’s back hurts~! Something must of set off Valentino again today because that fuckin’ moth was ruthless . ‘18 reshoots? For cryin’ out loud, Val!’ Angel cracks his back and grabs his phone and sunglasses off his vanity as he prepares for the long trek home. 

Approaching the entrance of Vee Tower, Angel looks outside to see a downpour of acid rain. “Fuckin’ of course!” Thunking his head against the glass of the door, he watches cars go by including a very familiar work van. Gasp! Fumbling for his phone, he dials Corduroy .

“M’yellow?” A friendly voice answers.

“Hey button, mind turnin' around so you can give me a ride?” Angel asks, flirtatiously.

“Mm~ I dunno, sugar. I don’t think you can afford such a luxury." Sojourner teases back, seductively. 

Angel chuckles, “Trust me, baby, I’ll make it worth ya while. I promise.” He hears a snort over the phone.

“Well, who can say no to that?” The bear laughs, “I’ll be there in a sec, babe, hang on.”

The green work van pulls up to the awning under the glowing hearts, the passenger window rolls down. “Hey cutie, you on the clock?” Sojourner asks, playfully.

Grinning, Angel saunters up to the door and leans over, “Just got off actually, but~” He walks his fingers along the window sill. “Maybe I can do the same for you?” He wiggles his eyebrows.

“You are such a mess, get in!” The bear laughs as her friend climbs in and scoots the seat all the way back. “Hey darlin’, great timing. How was work?” She asks, turning back around and heading home.

“Oh my fuck, it’s the worse! Since my boss fully recovered last month, he’s been more unstable than eva!” Angel complains as he leans his seat back to stretch out more. “Fuckin’ hell, ya get blown up once and suddenly you’re hit with an even sicker bout of inspiration!”

“Blown up?” Sojourner asks, shocked. “Well, seeing as he keeps shorting out the grid of the city, I suppose it was a matter of time.”

The film star looks at his friend confused, “Wha? Whatcha talkin’ bout, babe? Shorting out the grid?”

Sojourner looks ahead thoughtfully, “Vox has a habit of causing black outs because he expels too much voltage while connected to the pride ring grid. That much electricity was bound to ricochet at some point.” She explains, slowing for a red light.

Angel turns to his side, “Sojo, Vox ain’t my boss, it’s Val.” The van stops sharply. “Hey, woah! Easy!” He exclaims as his long body slides forward. “What? Ya almost hit somethin’?” Looking over the dashboard, Angel sees nothing in front of them. When Sojourner doesn’t answer, the actor looks at her again, “Hey, doll fa-” He stops short when he sees the fear- stricken look on her round face. 

The light turns green and she doesn’t move, cars begin to honk. “Uh, Sojo? The light’s green, babe.” She doesn’t respond. Cars drive around them, honking and swearing at the van. “Sojo?” Angel snaps his pink-gloved fingers in front of her face, making her jump. “Sorry! Thought that would be better than touching ya.” He apologizes. The bear looks at him, terrified. “Pull over, babe, right ova there.” 

Sojourner pulls into a parking space along a sidewalk and shuts the engine off. Rain falls on the windshield as she puts her head on the steering wheel and begins to count in varying patterns. “6, 12, 18, 25, 33, 40…” Huff, huff,huff,huff . “Rain, dashboard, Angel, rearview mirror, radio…”

Angel stares at the strange behavior, what is she doing? Why is she listing random stuff in the car? ‘Oh~, this is those grounding technique we talked about yesterday.’ Angel remembers the therapy session Sojo led explaining how naming things they experience with their five senses can bring them back to the present if they’re going through high levels of stress. “Counting in strange sequences will distract your brain into focusing on keeping the pattern instead of the topic that’s freaking you out. Whether it’s addition or subtraction is dealer’s choice.” 

‘She’s panickin’ right now? Was it somethin’ I said?’ The spider wonders as Sojourner calms down, lifting her head off the wheel. “You doin’ okay, toots?” Angel asks, softly, watching the bear gather herself. Nodding, the electrician presses the heel of her hands into her mismatched eyes, a telltale sign that she has a very bad headache now. 

The dancer frowns, “Lemme drive, hon. C’mon, switch places with me.” Without arguing, Sojourner stands and steps to the back of the van, allowing Angel to climb into the driver’s seat after adjusting it to as far as it can go. It’s a tight fit, but it’s tolerable for the short ride home. Pulling out into the street, Angel continues the ride home while Sojourner sits silently in the passenger seat, hands still pressed into her eyes.

They drive up the hill and park around the side, under the side awning. Shutting the car off, Angel leans back with a sigh. Looking at Sojourner, he winces but asks anyways, “Wanna talk about it?” He offers. “Ya shut down afta I said my boss’s name. I take it ya met ‘em unfortunately?” 

Squinting her tired eyes open, Sojourner nods, “He’s the reason I lost my home.” She confesses, toying with the dog tags around her neck. Zzzzt, zzzt, zzzt. “He came to my shop with some asshole in a trenchcoat. I told them to leave and he attacked me.” Angel’s heart drops, seeing how small Sojo is, it was a done fight. 

“Little did those pricks know, I’ve fought worse than them. They just happened to catch me on a particularly bad day.” Her glowing eyes narrow as she remembers the day of the attack, “Nailed that trenchcoat fucker in the chest with my sledgehammer and that pervert moth with a flashbang. Can’t say he didn’t get his licks in though, I know he damaged my arms.” 

Sojourner hugs around herself, “Or at least I couldn’t use them how I wanted at the time, still clawed half of his stupid face off.” She takes a deep breath, “I remember him being on top of me, then I remember waking up in the wreckage that used to be my home, those two assholes nowhere to be seen.”

Angel goes numb listening to Sojourner’s story. This can’t be right, Sojourner is the one who put Valentino out of commission for almost two months? “Angel?” The small bear calls, watching his eyes go distant. “Angel!” He jumps slightly and turns toward Sojo, meeting her concerned eyes. “Are you okay? I didn’t mean to upset you!” She apologizes, getting upset again. 

The dancer shakes his head, “Y-ya didn’t doll face, I just neva suspected a little itty bit like you to fuck up an Overlord like that!” He chuckles humorlessly, “I rememba when Travis dragged Val back to the studio, they were in tatters, scared us shitless. Vox and Velvette lost their fuckin’ minds.” 

Heat begins to swell in Angel’s chest as he remembers the enraged screams from Vox as he held his lover that was barely clinging to life. “We didn’t hear from anyone for a week and neva saw anything about it on social media. We all thought Val killed whoever he fought, but clearly,” Gesturing his hand to Sojo, “You got the last laugh.”

Sojourner’s eyebrows raise in surprise, “They think I’m dead?” She asks, bewildered at the news, “That explains the lack of retaliation from them.”

“That and if they make a move against ya, there’s a possibility the news will get out that some cute, little cubby bear took down one of the Vees” Angel points out, laughing and climbing out of the car. “They rather bide their time than suffa an embarrassment like that! They’d lose all their street cred!” The duo enters through the garage and walks into the lobby.

Husk’s ears prick up as the laughter comes closer. He smiles, happy they both made it back home safe. “And that wouldn’t be the first time they were embarrassed in public like that neither!” He hears his beloved boyfriend giggle as they approach the bar, “Hiya, handsome!” Angel leans across the bar and plants a kiss on the old bartender’s lips, “How was ya day, baby?”

“Better now that you’re here, sugar.” Husk smiles at the tall spider. “Hey kid, welcome back.” He greets Sojourner, his smile quickly turning to a frown as she squints up at him. “Migraine?” He asks, immediately knowing what is bothering her. 

After one too many ‘complicated’ excuses, Sojourner finally caved and told the odd couple about the angelic dirty bomb and her ailments. She figured at least one person should know about her secret condition, but she didn’t want to expose her weaknesses when she wasn’t quite used to everyone just yet. Thankfully, Husk and Angel know how to keep a secret while helping the sailor when they can. 

Biting the inside of her cheek, the sailor looks away. “It’s not that bad.” She mutters, quietly.

“Bullshit, we had to pull ova and switch so I could drive us home!” Angel tattles, annoyed that Sojo tried to downplay her illness again. “Stubborn little shit.”

The bear glares up at him, “Snitch!” She snaps while crossing her arms.

“Liar!” Angel counters back, leaning over her.

“Tattletale!” Sojourner retorts, craning her neck at him.

“Kid.” Husk warns, pushing forward a glass of water before peeling a banana and handing it to her. “Now.” He leaves no room for argument, knowing how bad of a patient veterans can be. Grumbling, Sojourner downs half the water then bites the fruit. “So, what were y’all jokin’ about beforehand?” Husk asks as he prepares Angel a cotton candy cocktail.

“I was about to tell teddy bear ova here about that huge scandal at Vee tower.” Angel explains, popping a pretzel into his mouth. “Y’know about the puking?” Sojourner chokes on her water, her cheeks puff out trying not to spit everywhere. Angel slaps the counter, cackling. “Yeah, some guy spewed on Vox three times in front of everyone and Velvette caught it on live!” He pulls out his phone, “Here, I can pull it up.”

Sojourner feels her face heat up, “Oh, you don’t have to do that. It sounds gross.” She waves off.

Angel scoffs, “Says the chick that didn’t flinch at being puked out of a giant plant.” He flips through his phone as Husk leans over. “It’s crazy, he gets sprayed like a firehose.”

“You blokes talkin’ about the lunch incident?” Cherri asks, stepping off the elevator. “That shit is priceless!” Charlie, Vaggie, and the rest of the residents step off with her.

‘Oh, come on, noooo.’ Sojourner dreads as the bar quickly fills up. ‘Especially, not perma-frown.’ She looks at Michael who has a neutral expression on his face. In the month and a half the archangel has been here, he’s slowly warmed up to every other resident except for Alastor and Sojourner.

Alastor, Sojourner could understand, the red demon snarls and hisses every time the king’s twin steps foot in the room. Sometimes, he doesn’t even have to be in the same room, Alastor just has to hear his voice and he takes off. However, Sojourner has no idea why the archangel is so icy towards her, but she’s fed up with his attitude. Not wanting to be present when the video pulls up, the bear attempts to excuse herself and walks face first into the princess.

“Sojo, how was your day?” Charlie asks cheerfully, catching her in a hug. Damn it, so much for escaping. 

“Oh, it was fine, sugar pea. Thanks for asking.” Sojourner answers, muffled, her face squished into the tall woman’s chest…again. “But I’m pretty tired, so I’m gonna head upstairs and-”

“Wait, Sojo, is this you?” Niffty asks as the video plays in the background.

“Is what me?” The bear asks, trying to pull away from the princess’s iron-grip.

“The one that Vox is talking to-OOOHH!” Vaggie’s question quickly turns into shouting as retching and splashing fills the screen. The room explodes into laughter and disgust. Red and green eyes squeeze shut in embarrassment, this can’t get any worse, right?

“How the fuck did I not notice that before?” Cherri cackles, “I’ve watched this a thousand times!” She holds onto the bar as her knees weaken with laughter. 

Angel has tears rolling down his face, he hands Husk his phone so everyone else can still watch. The bartender looks impressed, “What the fuck did you eat?” He asks, looking over his shoulder at her.

Sojourner peeks an eye open and sees the entire room waiting for her answer. She sighs, it’s too late now to deny anything, might as well spill. “A Chicken salad sandwich, applesauce, and water. I had a migraine that day.”

“ This is what happens when you have a migraine? Charlie let her go!” Angel exclaims, pulling the two women apart.

Charlie looks between the sinners confused, “Why, what’s wrong?” She asks.

“She has a migraine.” Husk answers. The room yelps and scrambles away from the small bear.

“I don’t firehose every time I have a migraine!” Sojourner snaps, annoyed by the overreaction. “It was a really bad migraine that day! I was looking at bright-ass screens, it was hot, I hadn’t eaten, and I was racing against the clock!”

“What the fuck were you doing there anyway?” Lucifer demands, peeking out from behind Cherri.

The sailor groans and presses her hands into her eyes again. “It was an emergency rush job that Ethan asked me to help with. Val had shot up Vox’s goon center and was gonna kill Ethan if everything wasn’t fixed by 1830.” She explains, her headache is getting worse. “The combo of power lifting 11 40- pound monitors while balancing on a ladder is enough to wear anyone out.” Her head starts to throb and her body heats up.

“Why bother working for Vox anyway? Most people run away when it comes to workin’ for the Vees.” Angel asks, curiously.

“I didn’t know that it was Vox’s command center.” Sojourner grumbles, “Ethan asked me to help fix his boss’s computer, he didn’t specify who his boss was. Bad move on my part.” Moving her hands, she squints from the lights being too bright. 

Lucifer goes to ask another question when his twin cuts him off. “Let her go to her room.” Michael says, getting everyone’s attention. “Her migraine is getting worse.” He looks away when Sojourner turns towards him. 

Charlie frowns and places her hand on the bear’s shoulder, “Sorry Sojo, let me walk you to your room.”

Shaking her head, Sojourner declines. “I’m good, honey. I’m just gonna shower and sleep it off. Night, everyone.” She bids goodbye and steps into the elevator. ‘That was surprising.’ Thinking about Michael’s statement, she wasn’t expecting him of all people to notice how bad her migraine was getting. It was a pleasant gesture to say the least. 

“He still a spicy asshole, though.” She mumbles to herself, exiting the elevator. “I can’t figure that guy out, did I do something to him that pissed him off?” 

The first day she met him, she assumed he was in a terrible mood because of the fight he had with his brother. No problem, she can give some grace for that, she understands family drama far too well. When trying to say hello to Michael again the next day, one would’ve thought that Sojourner just insulted his entire bloodline. 

Entering her room, Sojourner scoops up her amputee cat and plants kisses on his face. “Do you know what that fuckface’s issue is, buddy?” She scratches behind his ear before giving him a hug. “Can you find out why he’s being such a twat waffle for me?”

“Mraow.” Captain Tailhook replies, purring loudly as he leans into the petting.

Sojourner gives one more fat kiss on his head, “Thanks, buddy.” Tossing him in the pillow pile as she gets ready for bed. 

She’ll figure Michael out later. 

Chapter 75: On Your Left

Summary:

Michael and Sojo get into a friendly competition.

Notes:

This chapter made me cackle! I didn't realize that I inadvertently made Sojo a meathead! She does prioritize her fitness though, but y'all can blame trauma and Gunny (separately) for that!

Date: June 14, 2026

Age: Ancient

Location: The track circling Hazbin Hotel

Weather: early morning crispy, like 0530

Current conditions: Going for run before getting started on studying the hotel

 

Michael flaps his wings as he pulls his ankle to his back, stretching his quad. Finally done with his warm up, the archangel tucks his wings back in and starts his first lap around the track. One lap equals about a quarter mile, so Michael plans on running 40 laps, just about 10 miles. ‘Maybe I’ll use the tires when I’m done running. I can change the weight.’   He mulls to himself as he rounds the bend. 

In the low light, he sees another figure running on the track, glowing red and green lights line their arms and legs. ‘Who is that?’ Michael wonders as he gets closer. They’re keeping a pretty good form and pace despite their short…wait. ‘Not that jezebelle.’ The archangel scowls as Sojourner becomes clearer in the dark. Out of all the residents, it’s her that he hates the most. The psychotic maid and the red deer are close seconds.

The morning after arriving in the hotel, Michael felt so bad about the argument that he went to apologize to his brother in the early hours. He was about five doors away when he saw Sojourner exit Lucifer’s room, her hair was messed up and her clothes were disheveled with dark spots on the front. She closed the door slowly so as to not make too much noise and was about to tiptoe away when she saw him. The sinner jumped and covered her mouth upon being discovered and quickly fixed her clothes.

“Hey.” She whispered, walking up to him. “He had a long night and just now fell asleep. Maybe give him til 1100?”

Immediately piecing together what happened, anger flared in Michael’s chest. ‘He moved on from Lilith already?’ Charlie is worried sick about her mother and this is what his brother is fooling around with? ‘He had his wedding ring on. She knows he’s a married man.’ Michael glowered down at Sojourner and stomped away, ‘Harlot.’ He thought bitterly to himself.

To think he had any remorse for what he said the other day. “He will trick and lie to you, Michael. He is the one who deceived humanity into sinning, don’t think he won’t try to trick you.” Azrael’s voice reminds the warrior. “He hasn’t changed a bit. He’s still the selfish child that only cares about himself.” Michael slammed the door to his bedroom and didn’t come out until Charlie knocked on his door for breakfast. 

Since then, he and Lucifer have had endless arguments and a number of physical altercations. He’s embarrassed to admit that a handful of the physical fights were broken up by that bear yelling at them to stop breaking things that she’d have to fix later. The sinner certainly has a way of making the two brothers feel like children with how she reprimands them. “Fighting doesn’t just hurt each other, it also affects Charlie! You two are going to end up hurting someone beside yourselves if you don’t tighten it up!”  

Who the hell is that sinner to say how his actions affect others? She’s the one who is sleeping with Charlie’s married father knowing how much his niece misses her mother. ‘Homewrecker.’ Michael thinks as runs faster to pass the bear. He doesn’t bother to announce himself, not caring that he spooked her when he runs ahead.

Sojourner almost trips when Michael overtakes her. The music playing in her earbuds kept her from hearing his approaching footsteps. Regaining her rhythm, she narrows her eyes at the angel, what the fuck is he passing her so close on the outside for? There’s plenty of track for the both of them. “Jerk.” She huffs as she moves further outboard to give the angel space, unaware that he heard her.

“I’m the jerk?” Michael asks himself, offended by the insult. ‘She’s one to talk, she’s the one hurting an already broken family. And Charlie hangs off her every word!’ He runs faster, unable to stop his glare as he passes her again.

‘Did this bitch just glare at me?’ Sojourner asks herself incredulously. “This mother-”. She catches herself and ignores him. Forget it. If he wants to run with three sticks up his ass, that’s on him. ‘I’m gonna be the bigger person.’ She sniffs and does her best to mind her business. Unfortunately, the two keep catching each other’s eye and get more pissed off with every lap. By the third time he glares at her, Sojourner has had enough.

“Fuck being the bigger person, I’m five foot even!” She chases him down the long stretch, turning to glare at him as she passes around the front of the hotel.

Golden eyes grow wide at the sinner’s audacity. “This little-” Michael quickens his pace to catch her. To his surprise, she maintains a steady pace, refusing to let go of the lead. ‘Does this bridge troll think she can outrun me?’ Michael breaks into a sprint, quickly passing her. ‘Know your place, sinner.’ He thinks smugly, slowing his pace once he has a good lead.

TP,TP,TP,TP,TP,TP!   

What the fuck is that sound? 

HUFF,HUFF,HUFF,HUFF!

Before Michael can turn around to see, Sojourner’s feet slam the pavement past him. “BITCH!” She yells as she sprints down the stretch. Michael swears he hears cackling from above, but he doesn’t care, his only focus is catching and passing that little shit once and for all.

Alastor was drinking his coffee and reading the newspaper on the terrace like he always does each early morning to start his day. From time to time, he would glance down to see Sojourner on her daily morning run, though he’s certain she doesn’t know he is up here. Not that it matters, the little sailor’s exercise routines never disturb him, so there is no need to raise a complaint. 

However, this race she’s involved in has him intrigued. Alastor just happened to catch the first time Sojourner glared at that irritant of an angel and it simply tickled him to see the shocked look on Michael’s face.  After the third passing, the radio host put down his newspaper and eagerly waited for them to return. It seems that Michael had taken a strong lead somewhere around the back or so Alastor thought. Sojourner came tearing down the stretch and overtook the archangel, shouting “BITCH!” as her stout legs carried her away. Alastor can’t help but cackle at the drive-by insult, especially when it made the archangel snarl and chase after her. 

“What’s so funny?” Lucifer asks, taking a seat at the small table with a cup of peppermint tea. Alastor is so invested in the outcome of the race that he doesn’t even mind that his alone time is now breached.

“Your brother has challenged Sojourner to a foot race and she just passed him while hurling an insult.” Alastor giggles as he wipes a tear from his red eye.

Lucifer snorts at the very idea. “Michael is too much of a tight wad to ever resort to-” His sentence is cut off when Alastor simply points down to the runners making another pass. The king stares gobsmacked, watching his twin sprint past his ursine friend and shout, ‘STUMPY TROLL!’ as he runs by. Lucifer turns to see Alastor wheeze and slap the table as he holds his stomach, laughing to the point where no sound is heard.

‘Well, if he thinks that’s funny, then…’ An impish grin spreads on the angel’s face, “Hey, Al.” Getting the demon’s attention, Lucifer snaps his finger and a checkered finish line with a banner sits in the front of the hotel. Alastor dissolves into a harder fit of laughter, stomping his foot as tears roll down the sides of his face. This is too good to be true. “Oh, oh! Here they come!” Lucifer leans over the railing, waving Alastor over. 

Michael is too busy looking over his shoulder to notice the finish line, determined to keep Sojourner at bay. Unfortunately for him, the little sailor is terribly competitive and puts the last of her energy into her final sprint. Bearing her head down, she roars as she runs past the archangel again, barreling to the finish line. Michael’s eyes follow her and sees what she’s running toward. 

Releasing his own battle cry, he rushes past the young woman and crosses seconds before her, finally slowing down. Sweat pours off his porcelain skin as he pulls in deep breaths, slowing to a stop. HUFF, HUFF, HUFF, HUFF! “HA!” HUFF, PUFF! “TAKE THA-” Sojourner continues past him.

“TWAT!” She wheezes, running around the bend for another lap, not caring that her vision is quickly tunneling.

Staring in disbelief, the warrior bellows, “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!” Michael takes off again, not hearing the howls of uncontrollable laughter from the terrace.

“THAT’S MY GIRL!” Lucifer hollers, hanging onto the railing for support as his legs give out. A harsh cough rips from his throat from laughing too hard. Alastor, on the other hand, trembles on his hands and knees, fighting to get air back in his lungs. 

The duo eagerly wait for the racers to run back around, but they never come. Quieting down, Alastor and Lucifer look at each other, what happened? Where are they? 

Rubber ducky the one, you make- beep.

“Charlie?” Lucifer answers, clearing his throat and wiping his face. “What are you doing up so ear- Wait, what?” Frantic screaming can be heard on the other line, “O-okay, I’m coming down right now.” Lucifer looks at Alastor, biting his lip in shame. 

The red demon looks up at him confused, what is that look for? “We messed up.” Lucifer confesses. “Sojo passed out on the track.” Alastor loses his shit again. ‘This fucking guy.’ Lucifer bites back a smile, “Get yourself together and meet me downstairs.” Snapping a portal open, the king enters the lobby.

‘Stupid fucking bear.’ Michael grumbles inwardly, laying the unconscious sinner on the couch in the parlor. He grabs the bottom of his shirt and wipes the sweat off his face, annoyed that his precious niece is so worked up over this degenerate. 

‘She was already out of stamina and she lost the race! It’s her own pride that knocked herself unconscious!’ Irritation burns in his toned chest, he can’t believe she kept running and called him a twat. What was she trying to prove, that she can go longer than he can? Obviously not, he’s not the unconscious idiot on the couch, is he?

A portal opens, allowing Lucifer to enter the parlour right as Charlie and Vaggie return from the kitchen with a bowl of water and ice. “Dad!” She runs to the back of the couch, almost spilling the water. “Uncle Mike said Sojo passed out running on the track. Can you check to see if she’s okay?” Michael frowns, he’s standing right here, why didn’t she ask him to check? He tries not to feel hurt about it.

Lucifer steps around his little brother and places his hand on Sojourner’s forehead. Smiling softly, he looks up at his daughter. “She’s fine, Ducky, she just ran too hard that’s all.” Charlie sighs in relief as Vaggie wets a towel and places it on the sinner’s forehead. “I saw what happened, your uncle challenged her to a race and she got a little too competitive.”

Michael’s heavy brows leap to his forehead, Lucifer saw that? A deep golden hue spreads across his face, how much of the race did his twin see? Charlie looks at her uncle, “Really, Uncle Mike? You and Sojo raced?”

“Indeed they did.” Alastor emerges from the shadows beside Charlie, sipping from his ‘Oh Deer’ mug. “Our dear counselor was just finishing up her six mile run when your uncle ‘poked the bear’ so to speak.” Michael’s face burns hotter, Alastor saw too?

“Oh wow, I didn’t know she had already been running for that long .” Lucifer says, overly surprised. “I thought they started at the same time, fair and square.” Michael feels his eye twitch, they’re ganging up on him and they know it. “And to think she passed him so many times, that’s so impressive!” It takes everything in Lucifer not to look over to his brother, he can only imagine how gold his face is right now.

“Oh well, I’m sure Uncle Mike just wanted a friendly race, for fun, right?” Charlie smiles hopefully, aware of the tense atmosphere. 

Michael forces a smile, “Yeah, I’ve never seen your dad or Albert ever exercise in the six weeks I’ve been here, so it’s nice to know that someone can actually keep up!” He sees Alastor and Lucifer twitch, knowing he got them where it hurts. “I train regularly, obviously. If Sojourner can hold her own in a race against me despite being tired, I can’t imagine how she’d do against an amateur.”  

Static feedback starts to fill the room as Lucifer chuckles a little too lightly. Satisfied that he’s successfully pissed both demons off, Michael claps his hands together. “Whelp, I’m gonna go finish my workout. I’ll come find you ladies after my shower, okay?”

“Sure thing, sir.” Vaggie mutters, watching Alastor damn near snarl as Michael struts past him. Looking down at Sojourner, the ex-exorcist changes the cloth on her forehead, “Babe, why don’t you and your dad go have breakfast? I’ll stay with Sojo.” She offers to her girlfriend.

“Vaggie, are you sure? You haven’t eaten either.” Charlie clasps her hands to her chest.

Smiling warmly, Vaggie nods. “Of course, sweetie, you two enjoy yourself.” She looks between the father and daughter duo.

Returning the smile, Lucifer squeezes Vaggie’s shoulder as he leads Charlie to the kitchen. “Thank you, dear. I’ll make a fresh stack of dolce leche pancakes for you.”

Her eye shines bright with excitement, “Thank you, sir!” She exclaims, her mouth already watering.

“Aht, aht! What did I say about ‘sir’?” Lucifer wags his finger in warning.

Blushing gold, Vaggie clears her throat, “Thank you…Lucifer.” She mumbles, embarrassed. Her blush gets deeper when he gives her a hug.

“Atta girl, you’re working on it!” Lucifer walks away with his daughter.

Watching the two walk out of earshot, Vaggie turns to Alastor who has a look of disgust on his smiling face. “Did you and Lucifer antagonize them?” She asks, suspiciously.

“We did nothing of the sort!” Alastor looks toward the front door with a scowl. “It was that pitiful excuse of an archangel that threw down the gauntlet, he antagonized her first. In fact, Sojo ignored him multiple times before she finally took the bait.”

Vaggie crosses her arms and huffs, “What is his problem with her?” She wonders. Michael stays on his best behavior in front of Charlie and he’s even relaxed, sorta, with the other guests. But it is no secret among the residents how much he dislikes Sojourner.

And that’s the part that confuses everyone.

Chapter 76: Boiling Point

Summary:

Sojo has had enough of Michael's attitude and decides to confront him about it.

Notes:

Hey~ A few TW before we get started. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, PANIC ATTACKS

Date: June 16, 2026

Age: A dead electrician 

Location: Hazbin Hotel Kitchen

Weather: It’s already hot and it’s only 0600

Current Condition: About sick of him

 

Sojourner considers herself a pretty easy going person, what you see is normally what you get as far as she’s concerned. And despite how short her temper truly is, all that self-help and mental work has put a barrier around her almost nonexistent fuse. That being said, the sailor understands that some individuals can take longer than others to warm up to new people. Inwardly, she is that type of person, no shame. But for fuck’s. SAKE! It’s been six weeks and this archangel is curb stomping her last good nerve. How in the fuck is he a biblical being? He’s a total buttwad! She's been damned for almost eight years now and so far, only the Vees have managed to get under her skin. But those idiots are child’s play compared to the pompous ass that now curses the home she lives in.

The electrician finishes packing her lunch for a day full of repairs. Now that she is basically the emotional counselor of the hotel, she’s been trying to divvy up her time between her own business, helping Charlie with redemption plans, and talking to Lucifer. ‘ Can’t believe I’m actually grateful for a full day of work.’ Sojourner sighs, but she needs a break from this place, those angelic twins are driving everyone nuts! 

Lucifer has been acting like a petulant child with the way he provokes his brother. Snide comments, jabs and pokes, picking fights whenever he can, does he not understand his actions make things harder for Charlie? Not to mention, two seraphim’s throwing down is dangerous, not only to the property, but to the residents as well! Vaggie and Sojourner don’t know how else to explain it so the king gets it through his hard head. ‘And then he gets mopey afterwards.’ 

It’s so frustrating, Lucifer has been doing so well in his shadow work, the evidence of his efforts can be seen. He participates in group therapy, he’s adamant about his tasks for the day, he wants to go on walks outside, it’s awesome. When it comes to Charlie, Lucifer now takes initiative to start in-depth talks and bonding activities with her, when before, the very idea would shut him down immediately. But whenever Michael is around, the king goes right back to being a twelve year old brathole. 

Ugh, Michael. A pang of annoyance makes Sojourner’s head hurt, she can’t even begin to start on that mess. He straight up hates the sailor and for the afterlife of her, she doesn’t know why. She’d love to sit down and talk about it, but besides glaring at her and calling her a stumpy troll, Michael refuses to give her even a minute.

He pays attention during therapy sessions, even if he doesn’t participate. Though he does ask very thought-provoking questions, which Sojourner hates to admit, have offered new ways of approaching therapy methods. Having the residents lead a group discussion about a therapy topic they’re interested in is a good way to ensure that residents are doing their own shadow work outside of designated times. ‘Now, if he would just get the stick out of his ass and work with me, maybe the hotel will have a quicker output of redemption.’ But again, that requires interaction from Michael, which is not happening anytime soon. 

Sojourner hangs her head in her hands and groans. “Today will be different.” She says determinedly. “Today will be the turning point. There’s gotta be a breakthrough or some shit, fuck.” She picks up her lunch bag to leave as the door to the kitchen swings open. ‘Aw, fuck me with a sliding door.’ The source of her stress walks in with his coffee mug and dark circles under his eyes, he looks absolutely exhausted. Sojourner studies him, ‘Does he have insomnia too? I know he has terrible anxiety.’ The angel pauses when he sees Sojourner and frowns. Not saying a word, the angel shuffles to the coffee machine and opens a bag of dark roast. Biting back a scowl, Sojourner her things, he will not get under her skin today.

“Morning.” She greets as she tightens down the lid of her thermos. Silence. Anger prickles at the back of the bear’s head. “Have a nice day.” She wishes, walking past him. He ignores her. Sojourner places her hand against the swinging door and stops, enough is enough. “The fuck is your problem?” She asks, looking over her shoulder. Michael pauses what he’s doing.

“I beg your pardon?” He asks, not turning around.

“I said, the fuck is your problem?” Sojourner turns fully around to face him. “Why are you so nasty to me? I’ve done nothing to you!”

Michael turns around and crosses his arms. For someone so “emotionally intelligent”, it’s ludicrous how dense she’s acting. “What business do you have with my brother?” He asks coolly.

“He’s my friend and I help him with shadow work.” Sojourner answers, noting how he dodged the question. ‘Stay calm. Don’t lose focus.’ She already feels herself getting tense, she hates confrontation.

Scoffing, “And Charlie?” Michael leans back and crosses his ankles.

Sojourner looks at him strangely, “Same thing, she’s a very precious friend and I teach her what I know about CBT.” She doesn’t know what he’s doing, but her patience is already thin. “Now answer my question.” The demand is clear in her voice.

Narrowing his eyes, “I’ll answer once I’m done.” The archangel snaps. The nerve of this sinner demanding anything from him is laughable.

The sailor sits her things back on the counter hard. “Actually no, you’ll answer now.” She replies, curtly. “I’m not the one who has been combative since day one.” Crossing her own arms, Sojourner continues. “You’ve clearly made up your mind about me without uttering a word in my direction, which tells me you’re fine operating on wrong information.”

Indignation flares in Michael’s chest. “Don’t tell me what my mind’s made up about! You don’t know a thing about me!” He snaps, pushing off the counter. Not only does she blatantly forgets her place, but now she makes such bold judgements?

Sojourner sarcastically gasps, “What~? You don’t like it when someone assumes something about you? What a yucky feeling!” She mocks, pressing her hands to the sides of her face. How does this guy not see the irony in his outburst, seriously?

Michael leans forward in disbelief. “Assume? I don’t need to assume anything, your actions spell everything out clear as day! A piece of glass is more difficult to see through than you!”

It’s Sojourner’s turn to scoff, “Oh please, you’re the easiest case in this entire hotel! You really believe you’re foolin’ anyone with that ‘strong, but silent’ mask you think you’re rockin’?” She laughs humorlessly. “My god, your severe anxiety is as plain as the lack of a nose on your face!” Pointing to the angel’s body. “You clench your jaw when you’re uncomfortable, it hurts your feelings that Alastor doesn’t fuck with you, and you rehearse what you’re about to say in the middle of conversations!” Sojourner lists his habits on her fingers. “And that’s if you aren’t tugging at the bottom of your vest or chewing through pens. Tell me, how’s that ink taste, sport?”

Heat rushes through Michael’s body as his face flushes gold. How does she know that? Has he let his guard down that much? His jaw clenches, his chest gets tight with growing anger. “Watch your tongue, woman.” The warrior warns.

“Unclench your jaw, ethereal.” Sojourner quips, flatly.

Embarrassment floods Michael’s system, making him sputter. “Don’t piss me off, sinner!” He seethes.

An incredulous laugh leaves the sailor’s lips, “Piss you off? You slow or something? My very existence pisses you off, I don’t need to do shit. Watch this.” She takes an exaggerated inhale and exhale. “Was that triggering? Huh? Does me breathing make you angy?” The bear taunts. “You are all about making your problems everyone else’s, you prick.”

“I don’t do that!” Michael snarls, defensively. He would never do that to Charlie!

“You 1000% do!” Sojourner counters, jabbing a finger at him. “It’s obvious you and Skipper have unsquashed beef and you think you’re in the right in the issue.” She snaps, hotly. “And no one needed to tell me shit to figure that out, you two spit at each other enough that the truth is point blank! You continue to blame him for that fuck ass apple while he’s mad that you’re the one who threw him down here!” She gives him a round of applause. “Brother of the year over here people!”

Michael’s throat gets tight with anger, he feels cornered. ‘Stop talking.’ He can’t make the words come out, ‘I was given an order, I protected Heaven.’ Why does he feel frightened? She’s just a lowly sinner. He can’t move!

Continuing her tirade, Sojourner adds pressure, “And clearly your home life sucks, otherwise you’d be less… ugh, you!” A pure look of disgust sits on her face. “You’re like a rubber band pulled so tight the only thing holding it together is fear.”  She places her hands on her hips. “I don’t know what kind of fuckery you’re dealing with up in Heaven, but that does not give you the green light to treat me as shitty as they treat yo ass !” She slams her hand down on the counter with a loud SMACK!, not noticing Michael flinch. Her temper is getting the better of her. 

“People up there hardly fuck witchu and those who do, probably do so out because they really nice or you just pitiful. Either way, none of that sad shit is my fault, so don’t take it the fuck out on me !” Who is Sojourner kidding? She’s wasting her time talking to this fool. “I don’t know why I’m even messin’ witcho miserable ass, I’m out of here.” She snatches her things off the counter and stomps to the door. “Waste of my motherfuckin’ time.” She spits to herself.

Michael’s mind goes numb, did this bitch really say that and think she can just walk away? “Don’t turn your back to me, bitch ” He hisses, venom dripping from every word.

Sojourner looks back towards him, her eyes glowing brightly. “ Or fuckin’ what? You’ll smite me? Real tough shit you are.” She sneers. “I’ve dealt with worse than you and I survived, punkass.” She hates him. Sojourner hates him and anything else that has to do with Heaven. 

He smiles coldly, “You’ve dealt with worse? Like how you dealt with your father?” His voice is an icy whisper. 

Sojourner stops, “The fuck are you talkin’ about?” She asks with genuine confusion.

“How did that work out for you, hm? You know, after you sliced your sister’s pretty face open?” The archangel knows all about her temper and her tendency for extreme violence. He’s memorized every minute detail of her sins. 

Red and green eyes go wide, “Seriously, what the hell are you talking about? I didn’t-” She freezes, the image of her dad’s kitchen takes over her mind. There were two hands grabbing her, no three. 

“Yes, you did. That’s why you’re down here. In your wrath, you attempted patricide, sinner.” The archangel voice is a low hiss. “You can say you love your family all you want, but you are the biggest danger to them.” He sneers. “Were the biggest danger.”

“LET GO - - -! LET GO OF IT!” Queen is holding her bloody face as she and Elijah pry the knife out of their dad’s hands. “W-wait, no. My… my dad is the one who…” Sojourner stammers. The sound of children crying rings in her head. “LET THE KNIFE GO, SOJO! Call 911!”  Dad is backed into a corner holding Xenia, he looks terrified. "Cha-Cha...Tidas..." Hey eyes dart around trying to find them. She needs to go them, they're crying.

Now on the offensive, the warrior continues, “Is that why you try so hard to fix my brother’s relationship with my niece, hmm?” He stalks towards Sojourner, “Trying to redeem the broken little girl who can’t control her temper? The one who betrayed her family then ran away to Japan to escape?”

Looming over her, Michael traps her against the door.. Sojourner curls into herself, her eyes going distant. “What? Got nothing to say? You violent, little beast! That’s all you truly know how to do! You can lie all you want that you’re trying to better yourself, but deep down there’s a dark, angry, hatred festering and you know you can’t control it!”

Golden eyes glow in anger. “The nerve of you telling others how to live, how to handle their emotions, change their ways of thinking when you can’t even handle yourself! Your violence has ruined lives, Mitchell Crass is disfigured and half blind, Trevor Scabs is now a quadriplegic, and you wound up killing yourself trying to hurt someone, again, leaving your family behind to deal with your bullshit!” 

Sojourner says nothing, her eyes dart back and forth trying to digest what she just learned. Michael leans down to her face. “Finally ran out of shit to say?” Silence. Glaring darkly at her, “Speak.” The archangel orders.

Red and green eyes stare at him in disbelief, “I tried to hurt my dad?” Sojourner asks in the smallest voice. Michael is taken aback, he wasn't ready for that. “Queen’s scar…is my fault?” The grief in her voice strikes him in his chest, the archangel backs up to really look at her. The shock on her face, stiff shoulders, hands clenching her pant legs, making herself smaller.

‘She’s not joking.’ Michael realizes in horror. “Sojo-” Nervously, he reaches for her. 

“Cr-Crass…he… tr-tried to…” The sailor stammers, fighting to keep a flashback at bay. “Scabs…Rojas.”

CLANG! The green thermos crashes to the floor, cracking the plastic lid and spilling peach hibiscus tea on the floor. Sojourner’s lunch bag drops from her hands as she sprints out the door. 

Michael’s heart drops, he messed up. He messed up big time. “Wha…what just happened?” She knows what sent her down here, right? The attempted murder of her father. “Why doesn’t she remember?” The warrior thinks he sees something move in the corner of the kitchen, but he doesn’t care.

Michael portals to his room and immediately begins to pace. Alabaster hands twist painfully around themselves. “Why…why did I do that? I didn’t mean to…” ‘To what? Teach the sinner a lesson?’ Michael shakes his head. “No, that’s not what I did. That was wrong.” ‘She needed to be put in her place, she was attacking you.’ “She was trying to leave! Sh- she huff she d-didn’t huff huff…” It’s hard to breathe. Help, he needs help. Michael scrambles for his phone and dials.

“Hi, Michael!” Abel’s cheerful voice answers, “You’re calling early tod-”

“Help.” Michael chokes, hyperventilating. “Animals. Ask me!” Huffhuffhuffhuff “Please!” Stumbling into the bathroom, he runs cold water over his hands.

It’s not cold enough.

Notes:

Y'all ever did that? Take things WAY too far and immediately regret it? It sucks -666/10 Do not recommend

Chapter 77: Broken

Summary:

Our star players are dealing with the aftermath of their conversation in the kitchen. Lucifer having caught wind of it, finally decides to deal with his brother. No one messes with his therapist.

Notes:

Y'all, I'm not gonna lie. The next few chapters are going to be DRAMA! But that's why y'all are still here right? We live for the tea, so let's just sip and enjoy

Date: June 16, 2026

Age: Dead 30 year old

Location: I.M.P.

Weather: Who cares?

Current Conditions: Last job of the day, not in the mood for talking

 

Blitzø, Moxxie, and Millie peek in the doorway that Sojourner is currently working in. Music blasts in her ears as she sits with her back turned away from the imps, repairing their conference table. Something is definitely off, when they returned from their latest hit, Loona was as cuddly as she’s always been and said that the bear had already got started on the demolished meeting area. 

When Millie greeted her rough’n’ tumble companion, all she got was an earbud out and a nod, not their normal wrestling match they have each time Sojourner comes over. Moxxie suggested that the bear’s current mood is the result of their receptionist’s chilly attitude, to which Loona didn’t really appreciate. That comment launched the I.M.P. leader to have the much needed, but very much dreaded ‘talk’ labeled on the calendar.

In the other room, Sojourner ignores the thumps and crashes that are taking place in the other room or rather she doesn’t register them. Since her confrontation with Michael this morning, she’s not feeling the best right now. Though in her defense, not many people would be very lively if they found out that they blacked out and tried to stab their dad but ended up slashing their beloved big sister instead. Not to mention, having the men that assaulted her and Rojas thrown in her face isn’t very helpful either. 

‘Why wouldn’t they tell me?’ Sojourner asks herself for the hundredth time today. ‘I didn’t know that was the real reason the Navy sent me to anger management. I thought it was because how I was behaving after that incident at home.’ She gives up trying to make sense of it. It doesn’t really matter now either way, she’s already dead and can’t undo it. Tightening down the last screw on the leg, the conference table is better than it was before. 

A frown crawls onto Sojourner’s face, it’s a job well done, but she feels no satisfaction. ‘You wrong as hell for throwin’ his habits in his face like that.’ Shame floods her body, she was out of line for going off like that, even if he did drive her to that point. ‘Taking advantage of his mental health was fucked up and you know it!’ Bashfully, Sojourner rubs her neck. As much as she hates to admit it, she needs to apologize to Michael, if he ever talks to her again ‘Well, at least now he has a real reason to hate me . Whoopie!’  

“I’m tired.” Sojourner mumbles, putting her earbuds back in their case. All day, her clients like Vera and Paulie kept asking her what was wrong. She supposes that’s the catch- 22 when you present yourself as a happy person, others will definitely know something’s up when you’re upset. 

‘I know they’re all coming from a place of deep love, but I can’t handle talking right now.’ She feels terrible, the silent treatment isn’t what her friends deserve, but talking about it is just going to upset her more. ‘I’ll make it up to them later.’ Sojourner walks into the main office to see Blitzø nervously hanging up the phone.

“Oh, that actually went better than I thought!” The tall imp wipes his forehead and turns to Moxxie with a smile.

ZZZZZT, BOOOOOM! The door flies off its hinges and the inner wall explodes.

“BLITZØ!!” An eldritch red and black bird horror storms into the room, anger and power surges off the creature. Sojourner blinks half-liddedly. Really? Another fucking wall? The demonic beast dissolves into an towering barn owl dressed regally in a long red cape and top hat.

‘Well, this is happening now, I guess.’ The electrician sighs, she is really not in the mood for this. “Yeah, I’m just gonna text you, Blitzø. Y’all seem like you’re gonna be busy.” Holding two fingers up, Sojourner bids everyone adieu. “Deuces.”

Climbing into her van, Sojourner’s work phone buzzes. She’s tempted to just let it ring, but heaves a sigh and answers. “Hello, Devil Dog’s Mechanics and Electrical Repairs.” That was meant to sound a lot more enthusiastic than it was.

“Sojo? Hey, it’s Violetta, you gotta sec?” The Appalachian crow asks. “I could really use yer electric touch.”

Closing her eyes, Sojourner sighs softly. “Sure, witchy bird. Whatcha need?” 

One more job for the road can’t hurt, right?

____________

1713, Hazbin Hotel, Bar

Lucifer swirls his drink, watching the ice float in a whirlpool of his own making. He isn’t paying attention to the conversation Cherri and Husk are having. It’s been quiet today. Very quiet. Michael hasn’t come out of his room all day, even with Charlie’s best efforts. Not that the king particularly cared, he could use a break from his lesser half, the whole hotel could in fact. However, Lucifer is a bit curious, Charlie said his brother sounded strange the first time she spoke to him today. ‘He always sounds strange, so what else could it be?’  

Angel comes through the front door and makes a bee line for the bar. Lucifer looks away, blushing slightly as the tall spider plants a wet kiss on the bartender before nuzzling him affectionately. Seeing the happy couple doesn’t make Lucifer miss anyone particular at all, nope, no sir. Envy is Leviathan’s thing anyway. Cherri nudges him teasingly, smirking at his blush. Lucifer rolls his eyes, the bomber is really starting to grow on him. 

“I got a replacement.” Angel sing-songs, holding up a familiar green tumbler. Cherri whoops and claps her hands.

Husk smiles, “Nice work, legs. I know she’ll be happy to see it.” The praise makes Angel grin cheekily. “I had to ask Toner to dip a blank tumbler for me. Apparently, the stores don’t sell this design any more.” Placing the thermos on the counter.

“It’s still fuckin’ weird that she left her lunch though.” Cherri muses, resting her chin on her hand, “She’s never done that before.”

“Maybe she forgot it after cleaning up the mess. The whole kitchen still smells like peach hibiscus, not that I’m complaining.” Angel suggests as he sits next to his best girl buddy.

Lucifer perks up, “Sojo forgot her lunch?” He asks, his mouth already watering. “Is it in the fridge or~”

“In my stomach, ha!” Cherri laughs, “Too low and too slow, kingpin, that jerk chicken was delicious!” She rubs her belly for emphasis. 

“Damn it.” Lucifer pouts, he wanted the last of the Jamaican dish Sojourner cooked. Rotating dinner duty is one thing the king is extremely proud of suggesting. No offence to Charlie and Vaggie, but his girls cannot cook. At all. ‘It’s a work in progress.’ Lucifer can’t help but feel like Charlie being unable to cook is his fault. “Maybe that will be our next daddy-daughter activity.” He mumbles to himself. Thinking of a recipe that maybe Alastor, Angel, or Sojourner could teach them that will be simple enough for his daughter to pull off. 

Speaking of the ladies, Charlie and Vaggie come downstairs with arms full of art supplies and books, journals to be exact. “Okay everyone, bonding time! We have a great activity planned for today.” The princess can barely contain her excitement. “We’re decorating our journals! Come on!” She dances to the parlour. Niffty follows behind her, sweeping up the trail of glitter.

“Be right there, princess.” Husk calls over his shoulder as he places the last of the glasses underneath the bar. “You taking that with you, king?” He points to the diluted cocktail.

“Oh, uh~ Hang on.” Pulling the straw out, Lucifer chugs the beverage, grunting when the melted ice slides forward at the last minute. “Ugh, I hate when that happens.” He sputters, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and handing over his glass. “Thanks, Husk. Sorry for the extra dish.” The short regal hops off the barstool and joins the others in the parlor. Husk smirks, it’s nice to see Lucifer relaxed enough to let down his ‘king-sona’ around them. Plus, he finally got his name right.

“We doin’ this without King Twin?” Angel asks as he and Cherri each take a seat on  cushions on the floor. 

Vaggie winces, “He’s not…feeling the best. So we’re letting him be.” Truthfully, he sounded ragged, like he did after an extermination. She remembers the archangel trembling on the floor when Adam found him in his prep room after the second time he participated. The ex- lieutenant was sworn to secrecy by Sera to never divulge what she saw and to never approach him when he got like that.

“He is extremely dangerous and unstable when he’s in that state. He will attack blindly if provoked.” The High Seraphim’s warning shook Vaggie to her core when she told her, Adam, and Lute. “Get Raphael or Azrael if he ever gets like this again.”

“Oh, is he still moping from this morning?” A disembodied static voice asks as Alastor shadow-morphs into the room. “One would think that an archangel would have more resilience than that, shame.” He takes a seat on the armchair with a blank black notebook with a blood red spine.

“Moping?” Baxter asks, selecting a dark blue and yellow notebook. “Moping about what?” He smoothly removes the scissors from Niffty’s hands and hands them to Vaggie without her noticing.

Alastor selects a red metallic marker and pops the cap, “Oh, he and our darling counselor had a lovely conversation about their harmonious relationship early this morning.” He begins to draw stag antlers on the front. “Or at least Sojourner tried to, Michael wasn’t being very cooperative as per the norm. Which, unfortunately, made her finally lose her temper. And what a temper she has!” The Red Demon grins, knowing his audience is hanging off his every word.

“Sojo lost it?” Vaggie asks, surprised at the news. “That doesn’t sound like her.” In the three months she’s known Sojourner, the ursine resident has been easy-going and level-headed. Using humor to create fun games that encourage team building while teaching them about CBT.  Hell, even Vaggie and Alastor have gotten better at trusting one another, not by much, but it’s still an improvement. The ex-exorcist respects and appreciates how Sojourner can also take command and shut down arguments and fights before they boil over, taking a huge load off hers and Charlie’s shoulders. Overall, the bear has been a fantastic addition to their strange family.

Grinning like a Cheshire cat, “Oh yes, it was quite scathing, she listed all his flaws like a laundry list.” Alastor muses. “She had Michael backed into a corner with that brutal tongue lashing. He had to utilize unconventional means to make her back off.” 

Charlie stands up, “Wait, what did he do?” Nervously, she twists her hands. She knows that tension has been growing between the two, but the princess never expected Sojourner to use her therapy skills to attack anyone.

“Why he threw her childhood trauma in her face and used her repressed memories against her.” Alastor says causally, “He forced her to remember the very sin that damned her: trying to kill her father. Revealing that she was the one who severely injured her beloved sister in the scuffle.” tsk, tsk, tsk. He shakes his head somberly, “Not to mention other incidents when she resorted to extreme violence. The poor girl dropped her items and took off. Oh well, at least Michael had the decency to clean up the mess she left.” Red eyes scan the room, gleeful at the level of discontent present.

Charlie fishes her phone out of her pocket, “I gotta call her! She’s been gone all day.” She exits the area. The phone rings and rings until her voicemail answers. “Hey, it’s Sojo. Leave a message. Just not a long one, please. Taaaanks!” Beep. The princess tries Sojourner’s work phone, voicemail again. “C’mon, Sojo. Pick up.” Charlie doesn’t notice her father leave the room and head upstairs.

_______________

1729, Hazbin Hotel, Front Yard

Heavy. Sojourner feels heavy. Her entire body is sore as she slowly gets out of the van to head inside. “You okay, Mic?” She asks her tool pouch companion. It whines in response, “Yeah I know, buddy. That shit was cray-cray, wasn’t it?” Sojourner recalls that batshit scene she just left.

Violetta, the crow witch sinner, asked her to come over to repair the air conditioning in her rundown apartment. “I would ask my landlord, but he’s a sleazy, no-good, son’bitch.” The bird sighs as she leads Sojourner into her humble abode. What started as a simple wire repair turned into six essential repairs for safety. The craziest one being the light switch shorting to the tub’s faucet. Instantly, the final amount for the bill was more than someone who works in a flower shop can afford at once, making the poor sinner panic. 

Sojourner soothed Violetta’s stress by offering a payment plan or a trade off of goods, seeing that the witch was highly skilled in holistic medicines. “I think a trade-off is more plausible for me.” Vi scratches her violet hair, shyly. “I’m awful sorry I can’t pay ya cash, honey.” 

The electrician shook her head understandingly. “I’m fortunate enough that money isn’t a stressor for me. Especially since the place where I live doesn’t charge me rent, so I really can’t be a bastard about payments.” She laughed at Vi’s gray feathers puffing up.

“Ya don’t pay rent? Girl, where do you stay? Do they have open rooms?” The witch asked excitedly, desperate to find a better place to live.

Fishing out the hotel’s business card, “The Hazbin Hotel, where your only requirement is to redeem yourself.” She gave a soft pitch of the hotel’s slogan. “Give us a call. But in the meantime, I’ll come to you for salves and teas and such until the bill is paid off. Just give me what you can if you can swing at the time, sounds fair?” Sojourner stretched her hand out to Violetta.

“That seems way more than fair, honey.” The raven smiled, reaching for her hand. Suddenly, she yelped and grabbed her busty chest in pain. “Ah, fuck!” She hissed.

Sojourner placed a hand on her shoulder for support, “Oh, shit! You good?” Concern set in her voice. 

Coughing, Vi patted her chest, “Yeah, must be heartburn or something. I’m good and thanks again for helping me.” She grabbed Sojourner’s hand. Minutes later, the searing hot pain radiating in Sojourner woke her up as she rolled to her side. Across the destroyed room, a blurry vision of Violetta faded in and out of focus, a small light dying down on her chest.

_____________________________

“I have no clue what the fuck that was, but it fuckin’ hurt.” Sojourner mutters as she opens the hotel’s front door. “Yo, what up, y’all?” She called, limping into the lobby.

“Sojo!” Charlie runs and picks up the small bear in a bone-crushing hug. “Are you okay?”

“Down, down, DOWN! ” Sojourner wheezes, tapping the princess’s shoulder rapidly. Charlie quickly puts her down as she fights back tears of pain, “Holy fuck, that hurts.” She grunts.

Throwing her hand over her mouth, Charlie gasps, “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you!” She sounds close to panicking.

Sojourner looks at her animated friend, “No, no. I got thrown a few minutes ago and I’m still sore.” Her explanation comes out strained, “I’ll be okay, don’t worry.” She looks to the lobby, surprised that all eyes are on her. “What’s up? Why are y’all lookin’ at me like that?” She doesn’t like the attention at all.

“Uh~, ya doin’ alright for real?” Angel asks, wondering if he should say anything. “We heard ya kinda had a rough mornin’.”

A long sigh leaves dark brown lips. Of course they know about the fight, why wouldn’t they? There are no such things as secrets in this place. “If I’m bein’ honest, no, I’m not. But, I’m not ready to talk about it, either.” ‘No sense in lyin’ and saying ‘I’m fine.’ Sojourner couldn’t even keep a poker face with Jackie, which unfortunately earned her two more ‘ballads’ to cheer her up, courtesy of the thrift shop owner. It only made her mood worse. “There’s a lot I need to unpack and process, but I promise I’ll reach out if it’s too much, deal?” She scans the room as she gets a general consensus. Looking at Charlie, Sojourner smiles, “I had a really long day, sweetheart. I hate to do this to ya, but I’m gonna skip bonding tonight, I’m beat and burnt.”

Nodding frantically, the hotel owner waves her hands. “No, no, I totally understand!” Fidgeting with her fingers, she asks hopefully. “Can I walk you to your room?” Her yellow eyes plead for a ‘yes’.

Sojourner suppresses a sigh, she’s getting weaker to those puppy eyes. “Maybe just upstairs?” She asks, compromising. Charlie bounces on her toes as Sojourner holds out her hand to hold. Intertwining their fingers, Charlie leads the tired craftswoman to the elevator.

“Vaggie, cover down, please?” The princess asks as the door closes.

“No problem, babe.” The guardian replies, turning back towards the group. “Wait, where’s Lucifer?” She asks, noticing the missing king. “Where’d he go?”

“He slipped away while we were discussing Michael’s and Sojo’s fight earlier.” Alastor explains, breaking a red paint pen and dripping it on the cover for blood stains. “He didn’t seem very happy.”

“And you’re just now saying something?” Vaggie scrambles to her feet as she runs upstairs, “Shit, shit, SHIT!”

————————

1729, Hazbin Hotel, Michael’s Room

“Get out, Lucifer. I’m only going to tell you once.” Michael says, lying on his couch with a cold compress against his eyes. It took a full hour for Abel to calm him down this morning and then of course, Gabriel caught wind of his panic attack. Michael’s patience is long spent due to the constant phone calls asking how he’s doing from him and Raphael. He cannot deal with whatever bullshit his twin is about to bring him.

Standing his ground, Lucifer doesn't budge. Michael can come at him all he wants, but he is sick and tired of how his brother is treating his friends, specifically Sojourner. “I’m not going anywhere until I set some things straight.” He seethes at his brother. “I heard what you did to Sojo this morning. Is that what you do now? You attack women for no goddamn reason?” The king crosses his arms. “You think just because your dad’s perfect child that you can come into my domain and treat my subjects however you want?” He takes a breath, calming himself down. Fighting isn’t going to get him any answers. “What’s your deal with Sojo? Since the day you arrived, you’ve been nothing but a dickhead to her. She’s done nothing to you, including today when she called you out on your bullshit.” He asks, tapping his fingers. “Whatever she said, I’m positive it was accurate and you deserved it!”

Lifting his compress, Michael peeks his tired eyes open, “She’s done nothing? I deserved it ? ” He asks, incredulously.

Lucifer nods, “As I just said, you’re nothing but a two-faced jerk that bullies Charlie’s residents behind her back. You deserved it! She’s. Done. Nothing!” He defends, combing his mind for what Sojourner could have possibly done to a man she doesn’t know.

Fed up. Michael is fucking fed up with everyone today, especially that fucking bear. “Know what? I need a few things cleared up from you.” Sitting up, he yanks the wet rag off his bloodshot eyes and throws it on the ground. “She told me what she is to you, but I’m curious if your answer will line up with hers.”

Lucifer squints at his brother, “What the fuck are you talking about, Michael?” Terribly confused at his brother’s question, “Sojo’s a resident, the hotel’s counselor and my…my friend.” He stumbles on the last answer, not wanting to expose his poor mental health. “She…she helps me, personally. Charlie, too.” He looks off to the side, ashamed that he needs assistance just to function around his own daughter.

‘I knew it.’ Michael seethes, livid with his twin. Lucifer really did just move on from the very thing that ruined Michael’s life, “So all of this was for nothing? Everything you put me through was for nothing?” Michael gestures his arms out, “Didn’t you say you would choose that woman over everything? Didn’t you prove that when you unleashed Roo?” Golden eyes begin to glow as he walks towards his twin. His mind flashes every cruelty he had to suffer since the fall. The battle, the isolation, the loneliness, the scars, the pain.

The King of Hell couldn’t be anymore confused, “Michael, seriously, what is going on with you? What does Lilith have to do with Sojo?” He takes a cautious step back, getting concerned.

Tears spill over, “You choose that bitch over your own family, over me , because you swore you would never love anyone more than her. You forced me to become the ‘Spear of Heaven’ because you gave the apple to Eve! I lost everything because of you and that woman and then you have the gall to just replace her?!” Michael grabs Lucifer’s arm in an iron grip. “WITH A FAILED MURDERER NO LESS?” He hurls his brother through his door.

_________

1732, Hazbin Hotel, Hallway

“Good night, Sojo!” Charlie waves from down the hallway, smiling.

Sojourner turns to wave back, “Good night, sweet girl. We’ll hang out tomorrow, I promise!” She continues to walk down the hallway, unbuckling Hot Mic from her hip, “It was a really long day wasn’t it, buddy?” Hot mic chitters in response. 

The bear sees Michael’s door and stops, she stares for a second and sighs, ‘You need to apologize.’  “Well, can’t hurt to try.” She steps forward, raising her fist to knock when something fast and heavy slams into her and crushes her against the wall, knocking her out.

Lucifer lays there stunned against the broken door, did Michael really just throw him? “YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” Red and white wings sprout and launch back into the room, tackling Michael into the opposite wall. The impact knocks the wind out the warrior’s lungs as Lucifer throws him to the ground, climbing on his chest and landing punch after punch. “I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU!” Red horns leap from the Devil’s forehead as a long black tail sprouts from his back.

“RRRAAAAAAGHH!!” Michael roars, throwing Lucifer off of him. An ethereal halo floats above his head as blue and gold wings unfold on his back. He crouches down, ready to attack when Charlie screams.

“SOJO!” The bloodcurdling shriek stops both angels in their tracks, they turn to the entryway and see Charlie kneeling on a broken door, clutching the bleeding sinner to her chest. “VAGGIE, HELP!” She cries to her girlfriend as she kneels beside them. 

“Don’t move her, Charlie! She’s really hurt!” Vaggie instructs, pushing rubble away from them. Alastor appears beside her, his smile tightens when he sees the state of Sojourner.

Lucifer runs to the women, stopping short when he sees his friend. A deep gash bleeds profusely on the side of Sojourner’s forehead as her arms lay in mangled angles. A compound fracture exposes the bone in her left forearm, breaking the green formation light with three fingers severely crooked. Her right shoulder dangles loose, disconnected from its joint as her arm hinges in the wrong direction at the elbow. “When…when did she?” Lucifer stammers reaching for her. 

Charlie slaps his hand away, snarling, “DON’T TOUCH HER! GET AWAY FROM US!” She curls around Sojourner as her eyes glow red with her horns springing from her head.

Lucifer holds his hand as he takes a shocked step back. Charlie hit him, ‘She hit me.’ Hurt is frozen on his face as he watches his daughter growl at him. Michael stares stunned at Charlie’s form, mortified that she just hit her father.

“The fuck was that?” Husk shouts, running up the stairs with the rest of the hotel in tow. Angel covers his mouth upon seeing his friend as Cherri gasps. “KID!” Husk sprints down the hallway, stopping short of the princess, “WHAT THE FUCK DID Y’ALL DO?!?” His yellow eyes are slits as he bares his teeth at them. Baxter and Cherri do their best to hold him back from lunging at the two angels.

Vaggie stands up, “That doesn’t matter right now. Alastor, take us to the hospital! Angel, call Penny and let her know we’re there!” The spider whips out his phone and dials the army surgeon as shadows engulf the four of them, leaving a bloody mess behind.

“Hot Mic!” Niffty cries as she picks up the tool pouch and cradles him, “Are you okay?” He whimpers in her tiny arms.

Cherri holds out her hand, “Niffty, get Sojo’s car keys from him.” She orders. The maid reaches inside Hot Mic and hands the bomber the keys. “Let’s go.” Leading the rest of the sinners away. The twin angels are left behind as they stand in silence.

“She hit me…” Lucifer whispers, still holding his hand. “I was going to help her, but she hit me.”

“Sam-” Michael stops himself, wincing at the slip of the tongue. “I didn’t know she was there.” He looks at the bloodstained rubble, “I would never… it was an accident.” His skin feels hot and tight, a wave of nausea hits him in the gut.

“I didn’t even feel her.” Lucifer replies, still staring at the wrecked hallway. He finally turns and faces his brother. “Are you hurt?”

The question catches Michael off guard, he shakes his head, “Are you?” He asks before he can stop himself.

“No.” Lucifer answers back quietly. They stand in silence for a while longer, the weight of the situation finally settling in. “Michael?”

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too.”

Notes:

Okay, maybe instead of sipping we get waterboard instead, but we're all still breathing, right? I mean Sojo might be breathing WELL but she is breathing. He didn't kill her

Chapter 78: Get a Grip

Summary:

The hotel is in disarray after Lucifer and Michael's fight. Sojourner is hard down and with her "special condition", the others learn what's in store for her. How will Lucifer and Michael handle their part in this fiasco?

Notes:

Hey, y'all at the request of ElizabethFalcone24. I'm uploading one more chapter for this week! I am so honored that y'all are this invested in my story! It only drives me more to write the most in-depth well-round story I can. I really appreciate all of my readers. Much love to you!

Date: June 17, 2026

Age: A broken perma 30 year-old

Location: Sinner Sanctuary Hospital

Weather: Warm evening time

Current Conditions: Waking up in a hospital bed

 

It stinks like medicine. That’s Sojourner’s first thought when she opens her heavy eyes and sees…not her room. “Da fuck?” She asks, squinting her eyes and looking around.

“Just like last time.” A familiar voice chuckles. Sojourner turns her head to see Toner sitting next to Vaggie. “Hola, Mamí. ¿Como te sientes?” The skull smiles warmly, he has Sojourner’s tablet on his lap, updating the Devil Dog's social media account that Sojourner will not be available for unforeseen future.

The injured sailor tries to lift her head, but the room spins, forcing her to lie back down. “Me duele todo.” She groans, feeling like a freight train slammed into her. “What happened?”

Vaggie grimaces, “Well, to summarize,” Her eye trails to the dent in the hospital wall. “Michael got into a fight with Lucifer and threw him through his bedroom door. You were in the line of fire and got hurt.”

Sojourner blinks, trying to get sleep crumbs out of her eyes. “Word? How bad?” She goes to rub her eyes, but her arms don’t move. Looking down, both of her limbs are in hard casts, her left arm up from the hand to just below the elbow. Her right, all the way to her tricep with a strap holding her shoulder in place.  Toner and Vaggie hold their breath as Sojourner registers her injuries. “Yo.” She stares harder, questioning if this is really happening. “YO~!” She yells, trying to sit up further, the shooting pain in her back keeps her in place. “WHAT?” The heart monitor she’s connected to speeds up. “FUCKING WHAT ?!”

Oof, Toner and Vaggie were really hoping she’d be a bit more chill about this. “Sojo,” Vaggie starts, standing to put a steady hand on her. “Try to stay calm.” She jumps when the bear snaps her head in her direction.

“Calm? Try to stay calm? VAGGIE, MY FUCKING ARMS!” Sojourner rages. “Those fools wrecked my shit! I have a business! A business that requires my fucking arms!” Sojourner is so angry that she can’t see straight.  

Toner pats her legs gently, “Mamí, escucha, I know this isn’t ideal, but-”

“BRING LUCIFER’S REGAL ASS IN HERE, NOW!” Sojourner bellows, “Tell him to unfuck my arms this instant!” Her eyes glow to a blinding brightness. “Fix my arms, so I can beat both they pale, feathery asses!” Her feet kick in frustration.

Toner yells over Sojourner’s grunting. “El rey already tried that! It didn’t work!”

“Why the fuck not?” The sailor demands, her head spins from anger and anesthesia.

The painter rubs her leg soothingly “Because of the-“

___________

1637, Hazbin Hotel, Parlour

“DIRTY BOMB? ” Charlie snarls as her hair whips around. Angel, Baxter, and Cherri struggle to hold her back from her father, the king has never looked so small. Eggy and Russell lean back, surprised at the princess’s temper while Alastor looks on in amusement.

“I managed to heal her head, fingers, and hip, but the Grace inside her was going to tear her apart if I kept going!” Lucifer explained, sweat pouring off his forehead. His back is still sore from the recoil of the Grace in Sojourner's body throwing him against the hospital wall. “Sojo was hit by a holy weapon and it did something to her!”

Charlie snaps her head to her uncle, who somehow looks more stressed than his twin. “ Did you know about this?” Tongues of the damned spill into her usually sweet voice.

Michael shakes his head furiously, “No, I swear! I don’t know how someone in Hell could even get a hold of that much Grace! Much less turn it into a weapon!” How in the entire fuck did someone in Hell get that much Grace? Does Heaven have a mole? Is there a security breach that he doesn't know about?

Eggy steps forward, “I’ll explain everything once ya calm down, Charlie. I know you’re upset, but I won’t have ya yellin’ at your family like this.” She wags a finger at the princess. “Put the horns away right now, missy.”

Glaring at her dad one more time, Charlie quiets down and allows her friends to sit her down on the couch. She has been losing her temper repeatedly since last night, causing a scene when Lucifer and Michael finally showed up at the hospital. “How dare you two put my residents at risk! Was losing Sir Pentious not enough!?” Her voice cracked as she screamed the question, it echoed down the hospital hallway.

Lucifer almost broke in two at the question, realizing the severity of how much this is affecting his daughter. He would never purposely harm anyone in the hotel, and he knows Michael wouldn’t either. Since the hospital, Lucifer’s anxiety has been stuck at 11, just waiting for Charlie to kick him out and never speak to him again. ‘She’s never going to forgive me.’ He thinks as he fights back tears. 

A hand lands on his shoulder and squeezes. Looking up, Lucifer sees Husk looking forward, “Breathe man, she’s worried about Sojo, that’s all.” He says quietly. The bartender has calmed down, considerably since last night, much to the king’s relief.  He releases the breath he didn’t realize he was holding and settles down, listening intently as Eggy explains Sojourner’s condition in detail. By the time she was done, the entire room was silent with shock. Cherri is the first to speak.

“Joey…Joey fought Adam and Lute?” She stammers in disbelief. “That chick’s scared'a bugs, yet she was cool goin’ toe-to-toe with those two? AND SURVIVED?” She turns to Husk. “Oy, gramps, did ya know about this?” The shocked look on the bartender’s face answers her question.

“I fought Adam and survived!” Niffty chirps, happily waving her arm. “I love the part when I stabbed him a lot!” She cackles.

Pink fondant skin turns a deep blue, “Yes, she survived…” She trails off, sadness deep in her eyes. Russell puts an arm around the dessert chef’s shoulders and squeezes.

“Hm? Who didn’t survive, my dear?” Alastor inquires, curiously.

The confectioner looks at him, “Chester.” She answers, sadly. “Three years ago, he was stabbed by Lute and died in Honey Bear’s arms.” Instantly, the somber mood of the room worsens.  Eggy laughs, humorlessly. “Every year on their anniversary, those two had this ‘pay it forward’ plan. For three years, they went out on Extermination Day and saved as many sinners as they could. Throwin’ flashbangs and usin’ the sewer systems.” A melancholy pride fills her chest. 

Lucifer’s face falls, ‘Their anniversary?’ His heart clenches painfully. ‘She was married?’

Michael squints, he knows he’s seen something very similar to that before. 

“They saved my life the same day Pultzer died.” Russell confesses, he remembers the marine side tackling an exorcist into a wall and dragging him away by his collar. 

“MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!” Gunny barked as he led Russell to the manhole where Sojourner was waiting. The falcon recalls the red and green lights on the small sailor as she directs him up the ladder and to the warehouse where he and over 40 other sinners waited out the chaos. That’s where he met Penny, they were determined to find and thank the two who saved their afterlives, it devastated them to know they were too late to thank the marine.

“It’s fucked up that those angels double-tapped after the bell had rung.” The falcon’s amber eyes narrow. “It isn't enough that that bitch couldn’t take a loss, but she had to murder Gunny because he and Knight survived?”

Michael perks up, “What did you say?” Why did that name sound so familiar? “What did you call him?”

Russell turns to him, “I said those exorcists still attacked after the bell rang. E-Day was over and Lute stabbed Gunny in the chest, killing him.” The veteran does his best to keep his face neutral. If he had it his way, he and the archangel would be going ten rounds in the ring. “Sojo was the only one left alive on the street when Adam tossed the dirty grenade down on her.

‘They disobeyed.’ The warrior’s eyes widen, ‘Disobedience begets punishment.’ A grenade, that was the thing Adam threw before returning to Heaven. That’s why Michael was angry with him! He and Lute killed that sinner after the bell rang. Which means the woman screaming was… “ NOOOOOOO!” The bloodcurdling scream rings in his head. Realization drops Michael’s mouth open. “That was her.” He mutters, his memory returning.

Lucifer looks at his brother strangely, “Who was ‘her’?” He asks, perplexed by the strange behavior. 

Michael looks around, all eyes are on him. “I…Please excuse me.” Hastily, he leaves the hotel he needs answers.

Yeeeeeaaah~, This sex is on fire! Beep.

“Hey, candlelight.” Eggy answers her pink cell phone. “Oh, she’s awa- …oh, ugh . Yeah, she did the same thing last time.” The hotel crew eagerly waits for news. “Penny knows pain meds make her- what? Well, we’ll figure that out when ya get here, baby. Okay, I love you too.” She hangs up her phone. “Okay, good news. Sojo is cleared to come back home!”

Charlie stands up, her hands clasped over her chest, “Were they able to heal her?”

Eggy looks to the side and grimaces, “Uh~, no. In fact, she was very spicy when she woke up. So, Kingy, heads up for that. Ya twin brotha too.” Lucifer deflates at the warning, could this day get any worse.

“How long until she can use her arms again?” Husk asks, sipping his whiskey.

Fidgeting with her phone, Eggy sighs. “Her left arm, maybe two weeks. And for her dominant right arm…no less than five.” The room groans. “Well, the healing the king was able to do helped bring those numbers way down.” 

“There shouldn’t be numbers in the first place.” Russell mutters, earning him a hard elbow in his ribs from Eggy. Lucifer looks down, guiltily, he truly feels awful about all of this. Glancing up at Charlie, his heart sinks seeing how distraught his daughter is.

“Charlie, may I speak to you in private, please?” He asks, cautiously. She gives him a hard look before Angel nudges her forward.

“Go.” The spider orders, leaving no room for argument.

Sighing, the princess agrees. “Fine.” Is the only word she speaks as she steps through the portal her father summoned. Stepping out onto the terrace, Charlie smoothes her messy hair out of her face as she walks to the railing and leans on it. She doesn’t look at Lucifer as he joins her. “What do you want to talk about?” Her voice is low and even, she’s livid.

Lucifer pulls out a pocket-sized notebook with the word “Thoughts” titled on it, a rubber duck sticker that Charlie gifted him is dead center on the cover. Flipping through a few pages, Lucifer finds what he’s looking for. “I underst- realize that you are very upset with me and Uncle Michael. On repeated occasions, our arguments and fights have disrupted and at times damaged the hotel. And even though I have apologized after each incident, my behaviour hasn’t changed which has caused you and the other resident stress.” 

Charlie looks down at her father, her eyes widen as she sees the full second page he turns over. “Multiple times it has been explained how my and Michael’s fighting in particular was harmful to not only each other, but to you, especially because we are your family.” Charlie looks away, she had no idea how much her friends have been trying to help her. 

“Last night, I went to confront Michael after learning what he did to Sojo with the intent of finally getting to the bottom of it. I saw how visibly upset he was getting and instead of de-escalating the situation by leaving-” 

Lucifer turns to the next page. “I stayed and provoked him, which pushed him over the edge. I take full responsibility for everything: the fight, the damage to the hotel, and most importantly, Sojo getting hurt.”

The king turns to the last page, taking a shaky breath. “I apologize from the depths of my soul and- ahem and un-underst-stand. Sniff. If… if you want me to…move out.” Lucifer can’t help his voice choking up at the last bit. Tears line his eyes as he takes a deep breath and puts his notebook back in his pockets. Now, to wait for the inevitable, the silence is terrifying. 

He’s suddenly pulled into his daughter’s arms and squeezed to the point of pain. A warm drop of water lands on his forehead, he looks up. Charlie is crying quietly against the top of his head, her tears wetting his blond hair.

“Don’t leave me alone again.” She pleads with sob. “Please, dad? Don’t leave me.” 

Lucifer wraps his arms around his child as she buries her face into his shoulder, “I’m sorry, sweetie. I'm so sorry for everything!” He cries, holding Charlie tighter. “I’m sorry about mom, I’m sorry for abandoning you, I’m sorry for not supporting you, I’m sorry, baby!”  

The little family sits on the ground, holding each other until they both run out of tears. When they finally calm down, Charlie lays her head down in her father’s lap, thoroughly exhausted. She takes steadying breaths as Lucifer combs his fingers through her golden locks, just like he used to do when she was a baby.

“Thank you for apologizing, dad.” Charlie finally says, her voice is rough and tired. “I’m not ready to forgive you on everything, but I accept your apologies.” Lucifer nods, that is more than fair. “And…I’m really proud of you, for stepping up and taking responsibility on your own. I see how hard you’re working to grow and I’m very, very proud of you.”

Tears threaten to spill over again, Lucifer’s breath hitches. “Thank you, Ducky.” His voice is tight. “I promise to work with you as hard as I can for our relationship.” 

Charlie squeezes his hand that’s cradling her face, “And with Uncle Michael too?” The question is small, but hopeful. 

Lucifer sighs, tiredly. “If he wants to work with me, then yes.” He has to try, Charlie deserves a harmonious family. His daughter turns to look up at him, her puffy eyes light up with a smile.

“I love you, dad.” She says, giggling as her dad leans down and blows a raspberry on her cheek, just like when she was a kid.

“Anything for my duckling.” Lucifer laughs, wiping her cheek. He looks over his shoulder as Toner’s muscle car pulls up down below. “Sojo’s home.” He sing-songs, smiling as Charlie pops up excitedly. Her blonde hair sits on top of her head like a mohawk.

The princess jumps up, “Let’s go greet her!” She dances, holding her hands out to help her dad up. Lucifer takes them and yelps as Charlie lifts him to his feet with ease. “Come on, come on, come on!” She bounces on her toes as a portal opens back up to the lobby. Running through, Charlie stretches out her hands for a hug, “Welcome home, Soj-oooh?” Lucifer peeks out behind his daughter to see what’s confusing her.

“What the?” The king asks as he sees Toner struggle with a fighting Sojourner slung across his shoulders.

“Buenos tardes, S-sus Majestads.” The painter grunts as he holds the bear’s broken arms as gently as he can with one arm and pins her legs with the other. “Pérdonanos, p-por fav- Mamí, knock it off! ” He growls as she almost breaks free. “You’re not allowed to walk!”

“M’fuckin’ not goin’ stairs.” Sojourner slurs angrily, the sedative making her incredibly drowsy. “I’ll bust yer fashe…”

“She’s not gonna listen, Penny drugged her up, remember?” Vaggie sighs, her long, white hair is now a ruffled mess, she is worn out and out of patience. The shorter woman walks up to Charlie with a duffle bag of hers and Sojourner’s clothes along with a baggie full of medication. She gives her girlfriend a kiss before collapsing into her, it has been a very long day. 

“Vaggie?” Charlie asks, watching Toner struggle with Sojourner to the elevator as he asks for help with pushing the buttons. Eggy runs over and hits the up button with Russell, Husk, and Angel in tow, the six of them climb into the elevator and head upstairs while the rest of the hotel walks over to Vaggie for an explanation.

Resting her head on Charlie’s chest, Vaggie heaves an exasperated groan. “She’s… she’s not an easy patient.” She says as Charlie pets her head. “Anasethsia makes her really uncooperative.” Charlie plants a kiss on the top of the angel’s head as she hands the bag of medicine over to Lucifer. “She needs to take pain meds every six hours and muscle relaxers every eight. We have to sneak them in her food or something because she will not take them willingly.”

“What is she, a dog?” Baxter asks, incredulously. “The medication will amplify the healing process, why wouldn’t she want them?”

Burying her face into the tall woman’s chest, Vaggie answers, muffled. “I have no idea, she just fights when you try to give ‘em to her.” She whines, ready to go to bed. 

Charlie giggles, “C’mon, gorgeous, let’s get you to bed.” She picks up the duffle bag and walks Vaggie to the elevator. “I’ll be back in a few minutes everyone.” She calls over her shoulder as the door closes. Lucifer looks inside the medicine bag and sighs.

It’s going to be a long seven weeks.

__________________

1929, Hazbin Hotel, 2nd Floor Hallway

Approaching Sojourner’s door for the fourth time in the past 20 minutes, Lucifer raises his hand to knock and decides against it, grunting in frustration. What’s wrong with him? Just go in and apologize, he’s gotten so good at apologizing lately! Why is this one different?

‘Because you crushed her body against the wall with the door. That’s why.’ His shoulders slump, he really screwed up this time. Everytime Sojourner broke up his and Michael fight, she would bring him aside and talk to him, one-on-one. There was never any judgement in her tone, no chastising, but there was disappointment, and that was always worse.

“You’re allowed to make mistakes, Skipper. But, it’s also your responsibility to learn and grow from your mistakes, otherwise your apology will lose merit. Apologies without action is just manipulation. So don’t say sorry unless you’re ready to grow.”

Lucifer is ready to grow, he knows he is. And he truly hadn’t meant for that fight to escalate how it did. It’s plain as day that Michael has got some serious shit going on, internally. The king couldn’t play the fool as to why his brother is the way he is even with his best script or performance.  ‘I still don’t know how in the world he associated Lilith with Sojo.’ That is the biggest mystery of all and as much as he would love to solve it, the sinner behind the door is his priority right now. Before he can stop himself, his knuckles rap on the door.

Angel answers and peers down. “Hey, Short King.” He says tiredly. “Wanna talk to her?” 

Nodding, sweat starts pouring down the side of the fallen angel’s face. His red eyes asking, ‘Does she want to see me?’ . 

The spider steps aside and lets Lucifer walk inside. Soft music plays on her tv with a background of a little computer man and a frog sitting a drinking tea while they watch the rain. Ambience lights turn the room a warm magenta with pink neon fairy lights lining the ceiling. 

Eggy is lying on the bed beside the injured sinner while Husk and Toner sit on the giant pillow pile in the middle of the floor. Russell is lounging on the gamer chair at her desk, drinking a soda from her mini-fridge.

Twisting his hands together, Lucifer swallows thickly as he walks to the center of the room. Angel struts up behind him, “Hey, guys, let’s give them the room.” A collective of groans and complaints fill the air.

“But I’m comfortable.” Toner whines, sinking further into the pillows. “Ayudame, hermano.” Holding his hands up to the tall sinner. Rolling his eyes, Angel rescues Toner from sinking into comfy oblivion, smirking at the painter's noodly behavior.

Russell grunts as he slowly raises from the chair and helps Husk up. Eggy plants a kiss on Sojourner’s forehead before climbing off the bed and walking out. She gives Lucifer an encouraging squeeze on the shoulder before taking her husband’s hand and following the group out.

There’s an intense silence between them despite the LoFi playing quietly. The king can’t make eye contact as his anxiety goes into overdrive. What if Sojo hates him now? What if she never forgives him or refuses to hear him out? What if-

“Will you bring your nervous ass over here and sit? Jesus.” The sailor cuts off his impending spiral. Snapping off his hat and coat, Lucifer approaches her bedside. “No shoes on the bed.” Sojourner quips as she wiggles to give more room to her friend.

Climbing on the foot of the bed, the king sits criss-cross from his companion, pulling a goose squishmellow from the line up into his lap. Sojourner waits patiently for Lucifer to gather himself, knowing how bad he’s worked up.

‘How do I start this off?’ The angel went through the rest of his thought book plus a quarter of his new one trying to write his apology down, but nothing was sticking. ‘Why the fuck did I think I could wing this?!’ Squeezing plush tighter, Lucifer’s breathing picks up.

“Have you spoken to Charlie?” Sojourner asks, hoping to give him a starting point.

“Hm? Oh, uh, y-yeah, yeah, I did…” Lucifer stammers, fidgeting with the nubby wings. “She and I are okay. We, uh, cried a lot. Which…is…good?” Fuck, he is so bad at this.

“Holy fuck, you are awkward, bud.” Sojourner says in a mock mid-western accent. Lucifer chuckles lightly, then laughs, a smile finally cracking across his beautiful face. The bears grins triumphantly, proud to have broken the tension.

“I’m so sorry I got you hurt, Sojo.” Red eyes meet mismatched ones. “I tried to confront Michael about yesterday and I pushed him way too far. He was already in bad shape.” He pinches the orange bill of the toy. “I was so angry with how he’s been treating you and then i heard what he said to you.” Lucifer sighs, “But I screwed up. I didn’t even know you were under the door, I…” The king chokes up.

“Oh, you travel-sized man-baby, c’mere.” Her left cast pats beside her, watching him climb over and gently places head on her shoulder. “I don’t hate you, Skipper. In fact, I love you very much. I don’t hate Michael, either. But we need you two to do better.” Sojourner explains. “I’m not saying hurry up and heal, but I am asking for more conscious effort from both of you. Especially you, since you’ve been putting in the work already.”

Lucifer looks down ashamed. “I slipped really bad.” He mutters, hugging the goose to his chest.

“And what did we learn about slipping?” The counselor prompts.

Taking a deep breath, “Slipping is a part of the process. Take a breath, stand back up, and pay more attention.” Lucifer recited the mantra.

Sojourner nods. “No one is perfect, so don’t expect perfection from yourself or others. Just do your best, okay?”

“Okay.”

“The next several weeks are gonna hurt, literally. My mood is gonna be all over the place, people are gonna have to step up, the norm is gonna change.” The sailor lists. “But you doing your part and helping instead of fighting could make or break this. You know Charlie is going to try to take on everything herself. That’s just how baby- girl is wired.” Sojourner yawns. “So ask yourself, how can you use your power and influence to help the others?”

The sailor falls asleep as Lucifer goes into deep thought. Sojourner is going to need around the clock care from someone who is knowledgeable and suited to take care of patients. Pulling out his phone, Lucifer dials Belphegor. “Hey, Bell, can I see you tomorrow? I need a huge favor for someone really important to me.” He whispers quietly as to not disturb the sleeping bear.

Time to act like a king.

Notes:

No love was lost between Lucifer and his friend. The power of apologizing will only work with actions. Will Lucifer hold up his end? Where did Michael go?

Chapter 79: Welcome Home

Summary:

Michael comes home demanding answers as to why he just now remembered his last extermination. Turns out he and Sojo are more connected than he realized.

Notes:

I just want y'all to know how much your comments and interaction means to me. It motivates so freaking much and I have to stop myself from posting early! I love updating knowing it makes you as happy as it makes me!

Date: June 18, 2026

Age: Ancient

Location: High Angelic Courthouse

Weather: Gonna switch it up, it’s now… perfect. HA, YOU THOUGHT!

Current Conditions: A healer is pooing metaphorical brick

 

Michael is livid, he doesn’t care that he’s breaking protocol by returning early, someone is going to give him answers. When the archangel called Raphael earlier, his brother was more than happy to chat with him; after all, Michael never calls anyone. But when asked about the last extermination participated in, the good doctor suddenly had “urgent matters” to attend to.

The warrior does his best to keep a neutral face as he approaches Mabel’s desk. Unfortunately, he’s not very good at it because the poor bumblebee secretary is downright terrified. “Ms. Mabel?” Michael thinks he says pleasantly. “Where is Raphael?”

The secretary looks like she’s about to faint right then and there. Why does Lord Michael look like he’s about to kill everyone here? “U-uh… I-I- I don’t know, sir.” She whimpers, leaning back as far as she can in her swivel chair. “Sh-shall I ring him for you?” Pointing to the phone nervously.

Michael blinks slowly. “Yes, please leave out that it’s me asking for him.”

“O-of course, sir.” Her trembling hands dial Raphael’s extension. “Yes, hello? Is Lord Raphael in right now?” She waits for his secretary to check. “Oh my, uh, who’s looking for him?” Hazel eyes glance to Michael, standing like a statue. “He has a visitor, it’s a surprise.” The bumblebee listens to the response. “I see, yes, I’ll pa-pass on the message.” She daintily hangs up the phone and turns to Michael. “Lord Raphael isn’t taking any surprises at the moment.” Mabel sweats as the archangel expression somehow darkens further.

“I see.” An icy smile pulls across Michael’s angelic face. “Thank you for your help, Ms. Mabel. I appreciate it.”

“Of course, s-sir. Anyt-time.” She squeaks, watching him march past her. Waiting until the warrior is out of earshot, Mabel releases the breath she has been holding. Taking out a honeycomb pattern handkerchief, she dabs the sweat off her lip and hairline before fanning herself with it. “Emily.” She says, grabbing the phone again. “I need to call Emily.”

___________________

Heavenly Infirmary, High Angelic Courthouse

Raphael is terrified, he is almost positive there wasn’t a surprise waiting for him at the lobby and decides it isn’t worth finding out. ‘I need a place to hide.’ He thinks frantically. Sera’s office is too obvious as is his bedroom, making the whole palace a no-go. Michael knows the Rainbow Bridge better than he does and Abel is such a terrible liar that he wouldn’t be able to cover for him. ‘Think Raphael, where is the one place Michael wouldn’t think to look?’ An idea pops into his head, “It’s a risk, but it’s worth a shot.” The healer runs out of the office. 

Sneaking downstairs, Raphael enters Michael’s office via the window. Gabriel looks up from the desk, remaining silent as his brother clumsily tries to enter only to get stuck part way through. The messenger watches his brother struggle for a solid minute before speaking up. “Put…put your wings away.” He says, watching his brother tumble to the floor after he does so. “There ya go! Hi, pal, whatcha doin’?” He says, cheerfully. 

Immediately shushing him, Raphael army crawls over to his large brother. “I need a place to lie low!” He whispers, grabbing onto Gabriel’s sleeve. 

“Oh, fun, I love hide and seek!” The messenger chuckles. “Who’s ‘it’?” He asks, clapping his hands.

The healer slaps at his brother. “Quiet down! I’m hiding from Michael!” He hisses. “Now let me under the desk!”

“Oh, that’s awkward.” Gabriel comments as Raphael pushes him away from the desk.

“Why?” He asks, about to crawl underneath.

“He’s right there.” Gabriel points to their smaller brother sitting crossed legged in the armchair on the opposite side of the room.

The most ridiculous high-pitched scream rips from Raphael’s throat as he scrambles back to the window. Michael and Gabriel patiently watch him get stuck again, his orange-sherbert crocs hang onto his toes by faith alone. Gabriel watches Michael silently exit the room and turn down the hallway before another scream from Raphael pulls his attention away again.

“Raph? Do you want some help, buddy?” He offers from the desk. Placing a blue folder into the outgoing box, Gabriel walks to the window, keeping away from the flailing legs. “Stop kicking so I can help you, please.” Lifting the window higher, Raphael tips forward and somersaults to the ground with a soft puff . A cloud of…well, clouds swirl up around the Angel of Healing. 

Gabriel leans his elbows on the windowsill. “You okay there?” He asks, amused.

Raphael lays face-up on the ground, giving a thumbs-up before letting his arm flop. “So listen, while you were busy being a silly goose, Michael stepped out and is probably on hi- Oh hey, Michael.” Gabriel twiddles his beeft fingers as the warrior walks up and looms over Raphael.

“Hello, Gabriel.” He deadpans as he looks down at his brother on the ground. “Raphael, we need to talk.”

The downed angel looks up at his younger brother, he does not look happy. Sighing, the healer stands up and holds his hands behind his back, defeated. “Yeah, I know, but can I say one thing?” He asks, kicking at the ground.

Crossing his arms, Michael concedes. “What?”

Raphael throws a handful of cumulonimbus in his face. “POCKET CLOUD!” Mint green and white wings sprout and take him to the skies at breakneck speeds. Gabriel erupts into boisterous laughter as Michael sputters and chases after his brother.

“RAPHAEL!” Michael roars, flying after him.

Getting answers is going to be more difficult than he thought.

_________________

1643, Pearly Gates, Heaven

After an embarrassingly short chase, Michael catches his older brother and pins to the ground on the outskirts of the Pearly Gates. St. Peter watches in bewilderment as the Protector of Heaven puts the Healer in a reverse guillotine before lifting his shirt and slapping his belly gold.

“Talk! Why can’t I remember my last extermination?” Michael grunts as Raphael struggles to get away. “RAPH!” He snaps, impatiently. “DON’T LIE TO ME, TELL ME!”

Hearing his brother’s rage, Raphael pauses. “I…I can’t, M.” He finally answers.

“Why?” Michael squeezes tighter, earning a squeak of discomfort. “What happened?”

Hazel eyes look down in shame, “Michael, I really can’t tell you. Now, please, let me go.” The softness in his voice loosens his brother’s hold. Raphael groans and sits up, rotating his shoulders in pain. He turns around and sees Michael’s back turned to him. The doctor’s heart squeezes painfully. “Brother.” He starts, touching his shoulder.

Jerking his arm away, “No.” Michael's face is hidden by his shoulders. 

The tan hand drops into his lap, chestnut brown hair is tousled in frustration. “Let’s… go talk to Sera.” Raphael concedes, he can’t stand to see Michael like this. “I can’t tell you, but she can.”

Wordlessly, the warrior stands and waits for his brother to join him. Silently, the two archangels take flight and head to the High Seraphim’s office. St. Peter stares after them, blinking. “Yeah, hello to you, too, guys.” He mumbles, shaking his head and going back to his work. 

______________________

1648, High Seraphim Office, Heaven

Sera sighs as she sips her raspberry mint tea, thumbing through reports of Hell’s ever growing population. She fights not to let her intrusive thoughts of the hotel project cloud her mind. ‘To think we’re banking on Michael snapping and destroying the hotel…’ It’s sneaky and underhanded, but it’s what He demands. 

A nauseating roll flips her stomach, this doesn’t feel right, but she can’t go against an order from On High. Not even Raphael or Gabriel know the true intentions behind this, only Sera and Azrael. ‘It’s all for the safety of Heaven. No one will blame Michael due to his unstable mental health if this works.’  

If? That sounds like doubt. Sera’s heart rate spikes, does she doubt the Lord’s plan? Clasping her hands together, the leader of Heaven offers a prayer of apology. ‘Father, please forgive my doubts and weak spirit, for it is not my place to question Your divine word. I pray that you strip me of this weak mindset so that I better serve you.’ “Amen.” The seraphim releases a shaky breath, brushing silver hair from her sweaty brow.

The elevator doors slide open, letting Raphael and Michael off. “Michael?” Sera tilts her head in surprise. “What are you doing home so soon? Did something happen?” Raphael rubs his neck, refusing to make eye contact with her. Alarmed by the silence, she sits up straight, “Gentlemen, what happened?” She asks, firmly.

Michael walks up to her desk and glares down. “Why can’t I fully remember my last extermination?” His voice is low and even, there’s ice in his stare.

Sera freezes for a moment, her face betraying her feelings. “I don’t know what you’re talki-” She starts to say.

“ Sera… ” Michael warns, his shoulders stiffening up. “Do not lie to me.” The temperature in the room drops. “I remember how I almost smited Adam and Lute. I remember the sinner they killed after the bell rang. I remember that dirty bomb Adam threw.” Michael clenches his fist so tight that gold seeps through his fingers. “I still remember her screams.” He whispers.

“NOOOOOOOO! Gunny! GUNNY!”

The memory of the blood soaked sinner holding her dying lover as his life faded from him is seared into his mind. He kissed her goodbye, the look of devastating disbelief frozen on her face. 

Even with his memory suppressed, Michael could never forget that scream of pure despair. He can’t believe he actually met the voice that left such a chilling impression on him. The voice that made him turn his blade on a friend whom he thought was a righteous person. ‘I’ve been living under the same roof as her.’ His fists clench tightly. ‘I hurt her.’

“What dirty bomb, Michael?” Raphael asks, confused. “What are you talking about?”

The chair screeches as Sera stands to her feet. “I ordered Raphael to have your memory suppressed because the stress of the last extermination triggered your warrior.” She interrupts, getting both men’s attention. “This was not the first time your warrior came out. After your first extermination, you slipped and attacked Azrael after being pushed too hard in training.”  She remembers how all the archangels had to band together to suppress Michael before he went on a rampage and killed everyone in Heaven. “The day after that incident is when you lost consciousness in your office and you were put on bed rest.”

The warrior looks at his brother, hurt and betrayal set on all of his features. The healer can’t meet his brother’s gaze, it’s too painful. “Why didn’t you address Adam’s and Lute’s actions after that extermination? They broke the rules, they violated the deal between Heaven and Hell.” Michael's voice is low and monotone, his body feels numb.

The high seraphim sighs and runs her fingers through her hair. “Michael, it was only one sinner. Nothing came of it.” She tries to gently reason. “Lucifer isn’t going to risk bloodshed over one soul. Not to mention, those damned souls committed a bigger offense by killing Adam.” Leaning down to Michael’s eye level. “Are you going to tell me that that sinner’s life was equal to Adam’s? He was our first man, one of the first Earth-born angels, and our friend.”

Michael stares at her, stuck for words. “I’m not…that’s not what I…” He loses his train of thought. Is he wrong for feeling upset? Should he be upset? Everything feels lost and confusing. “He didn’t deserve to die…” The words are barely audible. ‘He should still be with her.’ The image of Sojourner desperately trying to stop the bleeding makes his own run cold.

Sera shakes her head solemnly, “You’re right, Adam was a good man, a beloved father, and treasure to many. I understand that this is all still very difficult for you.” She walks around her desk and places her hands on Michael’s shoulders. “I’m sorry we kept you in the dark about this, but we felt it was necessary for your protection and the safety of Heaven. Do you understand?” 

Automatically, Michael slowly nods. “Yes…I do.” He lies. Raphael fights back a shudder, knowing his brother isn’t telling the truth.

Folding her hands neatly in front of her, “Is there anything else you’d like answered?” Sera asks, her voice is calm and soothing.

“Do I have any more memories suppressed?” Michael asks, cautiously looking between the two. 

“Everything you need to know is secured in your mind.” Sera reassures, tilting his face up to her. “I would never allow anyone to betray you like that.” She promises, firmly. Michael ponders for a moment then slowly nods again, not trusting his own voice. He suddenly feels exhausted and it shows on his face. “It has been a long day for you, go home and rest. Tomorrow, you and Gabriel can sit down and judge souls before you return back to your special assignment.”

Raphael goes to wrap his arm around his smaller brother only for Michael to pull away. The doctor takes a step back and gives him space. “I’ll be home in an hour or so Michael, we can get dinner if you’re still up.” He watches Michael glance over his shoulder before stepping into the elevator, he doesn’t turn around until the doors close.

Hearing a low groan behind him, Raphael turns to see Sera sit at her desk with her face in her hands. “Sera?” He calls waiting for her to acknowledge him.

“Yes?” She answers from between her fingers.

The doctor takes a moment to gather his thoughts before speaking. “I don’t care if it’s from On High, I’m not suppressing anymore of Michael’s memories. Especially if we have to lie about it.” Sera leaps up from her chair.

“Raph, it is not like I want to deceive him, but-”

Holding a hand up, “I don’t care.” He interrupts. “I don’t care if I receive divine punishment, a court trial, or whatever. I’m not doing it and I will forbid my people from doing so, too. Do you understand?” Not waiting for an answer, Raphael turns on his heel and walks into the elevator. “Good night, Sera.” Ding.

Collapsing in her office chair, Sera fights back a headache. “I’m doing this to protect Heaven. I am obediently following Your word.” She repeats to herself, walking to the window and looking over the holy kingdom. Emily, Abel, and Sir Pentious greet the warrior in a group hug before pulling him into a restaurant. An uncomfortable wave churns Sera’s stomach.

“Do I have any more suppressed memories?”

Is the first redeemed sinner really a need-to-know for Michael right now?

Sera doesn’t know and can’t risk it either way.

Notes:

Electricity not working? That's okay we can just old-fashion and Gaslight our way. Had to recall some old feelings for this one and tbh, not a good time. Also good on Raphael for no longer participating in atrocities against his brother. It took a minute but we're there.

Chapter 80: Street Cred

Summary:

Valentino has been recovered from his last fight and is at this point malingering. Velvette has had enough of the childish attitude and the man enabling it.

Notes:

I'll say it once and I'll say it. It is so weird to write the Vee's and how strangely cohesive they are. I don't want to say they're emotionally more mature because they are NOT, but they do communicate better than most players in the story

Date: June 19, 2026

Age: Old-ass TV and a young doll baby

Location: Vee Tower Penthouse

Weather: It’s hot asf dude!

Current Conditions: Beefing with business babes

“We don’t have fucking time for this, we’re going to be late!” Velvette snaps, clapping her hands at Valentino. “You’ve skipped out on the last three meetings, your dramatic ass is going!” The tall moth snarls and tucks his arms tighter around his body, turning away from his two associates.

Vox pinches the front of his screen where his nose would have been. His face shrinks for a moment before returning to normal size. “Val, we all need to show up. This is about our credibility, we can’t keep making excuses for you!”

The lust overlord pouts and grumbles, tucking his chin further into his white fluff. “All that stuff is boring, there’s no need for all three of us to be there!” He argues.

“Val, the last time we were there, Zeezi asked if you had lost your status. Velvette and I were able to shut it down, but the fact she even asked should raise alarm bells!” Vox walks up and leans down to his boyfriend’s face.

Turning the other direction, Valentino mumbles, “If you two already handled it then what’s the issue?”

Velvette looks up from her phone, “Is mandem for fucking real?” Tossing the device on the couch and stomping over to Valentino.

“Velvette.” Vox warns, seeing the anger on her face.

The fashionista holds a hand up to his screen, “No shut it, Vox!” She growls, getting into Valentino’s face, “Are you for fucking real? Answer me!” Following in the direction the moth turns to. “What kind of overlord needs another overlord to fight his battles when he’s more than capable of doin’ himself?!” Valentino refuses to make eye contact with her. She snaps her ball-joint fingers in his face. “Hello? Am I chattin’ to my fuckin’ self?” Velvette asks sharply. “Cause ain’t no way in fuck I’m doing extra work for a giant piss baby!”

Roaring, Valentino springs up and looms over the doll, his extra limbs splayed out as red saliva drips down his chin in heaving breaths. “¡NO ME LLAMAS ASÍ!” He screams, Velvette looks up at him unimpressed.

Vox steps in front of her, “Val, relax!” Holding his arms out to further divide them. 

“I’ll call you whatever the fuck I want.” Velvette hisses. “I refuse to respect anyone who flakes out at something as stupid as an overlord meeting.”

The media demon whirls around to her, “Velvette, shut the fuck up!” He spits, “You’re not helping!”

“No, bitch, you’re not helping!” She retorts, jabbing a finger into Vox’s chest. “All you do is coddle him and give in to what he wants! I told you that was going to bite us in the ass, but you didn’t listen! Neither of you ever. FUCKING. LISTEN!” Velvette is fed up, she’s tired of the two men in front of her always feeding into each other and making each other worse.

She points to Valentino, “You’re always running off and doing something stupid and then make me and Vox deal with the consequences! Who ran your fucking porn studio when you got blown up? Me.” Pointing to herself, “Who took care of all your business deals and promotions? Vox. And now, when we ask you show up for a simple, fucking meeting , you throw a tantrum?!” Her arms shoot stiffly to her side as her hands clench tightly into shaking fists.

Valentino’s face drops, Velvette is actually mad at him. “And you!” She points to the TV Demon, “It’s excuse, after excuse, after bloody excuse with no accountability! That’s why this giant toddler always goes out and does something fucking stupid! ” She screams the last two words, making Vox wince at the loud volume. 

“Velvette, I-” The media overlord starts.

“Fuck whatever you’ve got to say, I’m going to the fucking meeting so everyone else will still takes us seriously! It’s bad enough that Carmilla and Zestial know that two of us can be defeated by a walking plush toy!” Vox and Valentino look away, embarrassed by that fact. “So I’ll go take care of us again while you two sad excuses for demons lick each other‘s wounds or assholes or whatever! I don’t fucking care! TRAVIS, THAT CAR BETTER BE FUCKING READY!” Velvette roars, stomping out of the penthouse. The double doors slam behind her, leaving an echo.

After standing in silence for what feels like hours, Valentino takes off his glasses and throws them on the couch. “I’m going to bed.” He leaves without waiting for a reply from Vox. Sighing, the tv demon flops down heavily on the couch, leaning his elbows on his knees. Tapping his sharp, blue claws to his screen, he tries to call Velvette. Her phone buzzes on the couch, his caller ID flashing on the screen.

“Fuck.” Vox whispers, hanging up. “Velvette is way beyond pissed if she left her fucking phone behind.” He grabs the device off the couch and walks to his and Val’s shared bedroom, knocking on the door. “Val, she forgot her phone.” Is all he says. After another moment of silence, the door opens. Vox looks up and sees tears streaming down his boyfriend’s face. “Babe.” He says sadly, handing him his red handkerchief.

“Don’t coddle me, let’s go.” Val mutters, grabbing the cloth and the phone from Vox’s blue claws.

_______________

1121, Carmine Tower, Conference room

Velvette feels naked, she can’t believe she forgot her phone. What is she going to use to distract herself now? The limo ride over was already miserable, this meeting is going to be impossible. ‘You’re the fuckin’ backbone, girl. Fuckin’ handle it.’ She hypes herself up before pushing the double doors open, the crowded room all turns to look at her. She feels her face heat up, shit, she should’ve kicked the door down like the other time. What kind of weak entrance was that?

Carmilla looks up from her clipboard, unbothered. “Velvette, your counterparts had more important things to do again?” She asks curiously. The doll glares, she is not in the mood for any egging, especially from some wrinkled, old ballerina.

“Just fuckin’ get on wit it.” Her British accent gets thicker with stress. She scowls and takes a seat at the end of the table, already done with this tedious meeting. Carmilla shrugs and continues talking. ‘This shit is so fucking redundant.’ Velvette seethes as the arms dealer revisits the topic of arming each district and angelic weapon control.

“Has Vox completed the project proposals for angelic security?” Carmilla asks, waiting for an answer. When the arms overlord doesn’t get a response, she calls Velvette again, making her jump.

“Huh? What?” The fashionista stammers, embarrassment flushing her cheeks a deeper shade of red. ‘Get it to-fucking-gether, Velvette!’ She regrets coming here.

“I asked if Vox has made any progress with his angelic security project?” Carmilla patiently asks again, noting how flustered the doll is. “He said he’d be done by this time last meeting.”

Velvette is stuck for an answer, she has no idea. “He…I-I” Her nails dig into her palms.

“Yes, I’m done and I have the blueprints for the new drones too.” Vox answers, sitting down beside her. He slides a USB down the long table into Carmine’s oversized hands. Velvette stares wide-eyed at her business partner when Valentino takes a seat on her other side. Whipping her head to look at him, she sees the puffiness of his eyes behind his designer glasses. Under the table, Val presses her phone into her hands before intertwining his fingers with hers. 

Bzzt, bzzt. Velvette’s phone buzzes twice. Looking down at the screen she has two new messages from Vox and Valentino, she opens the texts and smirks.

Sorry :( - Vox

We’re sorry </3 - Valentino

Who could stay mad at two idiots like them?

Notes:

Aaawwww, aren't they awful? And somehow...wholesome?

Chapter 81: Sins of a Feather

Summary:

Lucifer pulled some strings and called in a favor from Belphegor to get the best nurse she had from the sloth ring hospital. However, not everyone is stoked about this new arrangement. Also, a perspective new resident comes for a tour and meets the Radio Demon

Notes:

Violetta Morgan is a crow witch sinner created by my very best friend Venomous_KO I have full permission to use her in my story and my bestie has read and edited the chapter to suit her character. I'll drop the link whenever she's ready to drop Vi's story! Y'all are going to love it.

Violetta is first mentioned in chapter 72: Two of a Kind and later in chapter 77: Broken

Trigger Warning: Memories and mentions of sexual assault and medical abuse in this chapter

Date: June 21, 2026

Age: A pissed off dead 30 year old

Location: Hazbin Hotel

Weather: Far too hot to have both arms in itchy, sweaty casts

Current Conditions: Waking up from an unpleasant reoccurring nightmare

 

TW: Memories and mentions of sexual assault ahead! Medical abuse in this chapter

 

“You’re such a lying bitch! AV1 would never do that!”

“She’s just a slut that chickened out of sleeping with him, look at her!”

“Knight, I’ve known Crass for years and he’s never even glanced in your direction!”

“I don’t think he’s into girls like you. ”

A hazy image of a spinning ceiling fan fades in and out. ‘Who’s room is this? Why can’t I move?’ The thrum of the bass vibrates the bed, there’s very loud music playing. ‘Where am I?’ A shadow looms over, the face is hard to make out. ‘Can you help me? I don’t know what’s happening.’ Eyelids heavy as lead try to blink. ‘Who are you? What are you doing?’ Hands touch skin, something is pressing against lips, it’s hard to breathe. Moving head away makes the room spin violently, stomach churns nauseously. ‘Don’t do that, help me!’ Something is terribly wrong.

“Help…” Mouth feels rubbery, hands are still there, still moving. “No…” Lips pressed on again. Eyes close before moving head again. ‘Help!’ Eyes open again, Valentino is there. His face is rotted and red eyes, glowing. ‘HELP!’

“HELP!” Sojourner bolts up. Breathing heavy, she looks around wildly, the ambient purple lights illuminate her bedroom. Her heart slams in her chest, “Dream, it was a dream. You’re here!” She coaches herself as she names five objects she sees: Projector, pillow pile, desk, bookcase, game cube!” Four things she hears: breathing, uh, clock, she listens some more, wires? It’s too quiet.”

“Keep counting, osita amor.” Valentino whispers from behind.

Sojourner sits up screaming, Captain Tailhook springs off her lap and runs through the cat door out of the room. She tries to lift her arms only to have pain explode through her body. The door slams open, a neon pink goat wearing a nurse’s candy striper uniform comes storming in. “What?” She snaps, impatiently. “What is it this time?” The neon candle above her head flickers hotly. “I swear to Satan if it’s another one of your stupid nightmares.” She warns looming over the bed, her white asymmetrical bob is messy from sleeping.

“Brenda!” Charlie runs in with Vaggie right behind her, “Is she alright?” She asks out of breath.

The sloth nurse places her hand on Sojourner’s forehead, sedating her before she can speak. “Oh princess, I’m so glad you’re here!” She says worriedly, “I’m afraid she flailed in her sleep again, poor thing.” She takes a wet cloth and dabs the bear’s face, “I think she had another nightmare.”

Vaggie and Charlie walk up to the bed and look over their friend. Sojourner’s dark brown fur is hot and moist with sweat as tears stream down the sides of her round face.

“Sojo…” Vaggie whispers, adjusting the hot pink bonnet for her. “Do you know what the nightmare was about, Brenda?”

The nurse shakes her head, “All she said was ‘help’, I think she was crying for me.” She hugs her arms herself, tearing up. “I just wish I could do more…” Covering her face with one of her hands, she takes in a shaky breath. 

Charlie pulls Brenda into a warm embrace, “You are doing more than you think, you’re right by her side where she needs you.”  

The Sloth hellborn returns the hug, “You’re too kind, princess. Please go back to sleep, I’ll take care of her.” She sniffles.

“Thanks, Brenda. Call us if you need anything.” Vaggie leads Charlie out of the bedroom, “C’mon babe, let’s go back to bed.”

Sparring one last glance at Sojourner, the princess sighs. “You’re right, good night, Brenda.” Charlie waves goodbye.

“Good night, Princess. Good night, Vaggie.” Brenda says sweetly. As the door closes, her smile falls into a nasty scowl, “Great now, I have to deal with you for the rest of the night.” She spits, looming over the sinner. “I’m head nurse at Queen Belphegor's St. An’s Hospital and what do I get as a reward? Looking after sinner scum like you and a defective sinner to boot!” The goat hisses. Sojourner stares at her, unavailable to move until the sleep paralysis wears off.

“At least you have the good sense to keep your mouth shut, you already cause enough trouble with these ‘nightmares’ you keep faking.” The nurse air quotes the word before crossing her arms. “It’s hilarious, even if you did talk, I’ll just say what a troublesome patient you’re being.” 

She laughs, kicking a squishmellow out of the way. “I mean that’s why I’m here to begin with, right? You’re such a burden on everyone else that they need a professional just to keep you out of their way.” Sojourner’s jaw tightens, glaring darkly at the goat.

Brenda’s grin curls at the corners of her sharp face as she places her manicured hooves on her wide hips. “At least this gig will make me director when I get back. And so you don’t squeal, I’ll get my sweetie to finish you off.” She purrs, her yellow eyes shine with an ominous glow. “We can blame that Grace you have in your blood.”

A chill crawls up Sojourner’s spine. ‘Help.’ Someone please help her.

________________

0934, June 22,  Hazbin Hotel- Front desk

“Uh~? Hello?” A thick Appalachian accent rings out into the lobby, “Anyone home?” Violetta tiptoes in further, looking around. “I was referred to here by one of yer residents?” She holds up the hotel’s business card. A shadow appears in front of the witch, making her jump. 

Alastor leers down with his signature smile in place, “Hello, my dear, welcome to the Hazbin Hotel! My name is Alastor, The Radio Demon!” He takes Violetta’s hand and shakes it vigorously. “Pleasure to meet you, quite a pleasure! Will you be checking in with us?” He enthusiastically asks, still holding her hand.

Violetta is slightly taken aback, the immense amount of magic that pours off of Alastor is a jar to her senses. Shaking her head clear, she squeezes back, “Violetta, I was hopin’ to hear more ‘bout this place ‘fo makin’ a decision.” The crow explains, pulling her hand back, she can still feel the power flowing in her veins. ‘This feller’s no joke, I ain’t seen this type of power in ain’t tellin’ how long.’ Her feathers ruffle slightly then smooth out as the buzz finally wears off.

The red demon narrows his eyes, ‘Interesting reaction.’ He felt a pull of energy when he shook the woman’s hand, there’s an intense power dormant inside her, held back by something he’s all too familiar with. ‘She’s bound.’ Grinning wider, he offers his arm. “Of course, Ms. Violetta. Please allow me to take you on a tour of our fine establishment.” She takes his arm and he begins to show her around the hotel. ‘Why isn’t she frightened of me?’ Alastor wonders as he leads her up the stairs.

“If ya don’t mind me askin’, where is er’body?” Violetta ponders as she takes in the sights. She tries not to pull away, but the magic flow from Alastor is making her itch. ‘What kind of patron you got gon’ on? Not all this magic belongs to you.’

“The owner of the hotel, Princess Charlie, is out on a… oh dear, what silly name did she call it again? Ah, ‘bonding bonanza’.” He holds up air quotes, his ears lay back, embarrassed that the ridiculous words even left his mouth. “She and a majority of the residents are currently ruining their clothes doing a messy activity involving paint. I volunteered to stay behind and watch the hotel.” He opens the door to a vast grand library, rows and rows of novels, tomes, and literature from every century compiled into one space.

‘Damn, that sounds like a blast and a half.’ Violetta pouts, wishing she came earlier. They move on to a room filled with large comfy chairs, bean bags, blankets, and stuffed animals. The lighting is a soft light blue and the air smells of lavender and chamomile. “A playroom for youngin’s?” She eyes Alastor curiously. His disgust almost makes her belly laugh.

“Ugh, hell forbid! This is our newly installed… Heavens above, what did Sojourner call this nightmare? A decomposition room?” Alastor’s red eyes dart back and forth as he struggles to remember. 

“Decompression?” Violetta suggests, failing to keep the laughter out of her voice.

Snapping his finger, the radio host nods. “That’s the one, yes. This childish hellhole is our decompression room!” He glares at the stuffed animals, “Its use is for when our residents have overwhelming emotions and wish to be judged by these… atrocities.” Red-tipped fingers wave in the direction of the stuffies.

Finally, Violetta laughs, no longer able to keep in her amusement at the deer demon. “It’s meant fer calming down!” She giggles. “The cold air helps shock the senses back to normal while the light and smell tells yer brain there’s no danger!” 

Alastor’s eyelids lower, “Oh good, Sojourner got to you too.” He scoffs, looking away. 

Violetta shakes her head, “Nah, I just know that because that’s what I do to help myself! ‘Specially with aromatherapy. I make and sell my own ‘ssential oils so I know what lavender and chamomile are meant to do.” She fans herself, warm from the laughing spell. Whew! “Yer funny! You are funny!”

“A perk of being the most successful radio broadcast in Hell, I suppose.” Alastor quips, closing the door.

The duo continue to the end of the hallway when Violetta speaks up, “When will Sojo get home? I’ve got a few questions to ask b’fo I speak to the princess.” She likes the hotel so far, especially the library. ‘There’s gotta be spellbooks of all kinds in there!’ The witchbook figures excitedly. Internally, she vibrates at the opportunity to raid the library’s herbology and horticulture sections. Maybe she can finally get a handle on making oils and tinctures from Hell’s flora.

Alastor perks up, “Our dear, handywoman is currently out of commission for the moment.”

Violetta’s own piercing red eyes widen in shock, “What? Is she okay? What happened?” Instantly worried about the small bear.

Stopping in front of a bedroom door. Alastor gives three sharp raps, “Why don’t you ask her your-”

“HELP!” A muffled voice calls from the other side. “HURRY!” It’s Sojourner’s voice. “THEY’RE COMING-”

Violetta bursts through the door and rushes in with Alastor right behind her. Together, they see Brenda holding the bear’s face, gently stroking her cheeks with her thumbs.

“Shh~, it’s okay, you’re safe.” The nurse hushes as Sojourner’s mismatched eyes roll to the back of her head. “It’s just a nightmare.” 

The crow suddenly feels a heavy lull of sleepiness wash over her, her own magic pushes back at it instinctively. Alastor swoons and leans against the door, holding his head.

Brenda turns and gasps dramatically, “Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry! I must’ve gone too hard just now.” One of her pink hoofed hands lingers on Sojourner’s forehead. “Are you two alright?”

“M’fine, just a lil’ woozy is all.” Violetta grunts, shaking her head clear. ‘ The pull is still there.’ “We heard Sojo screamin’, so we came rushin’ in.” She steadies herself against the wall.

The nurse nods understandingly, “Poor thing has been struggling with nightmares ever since she was injured. Her sleep schedule is suffering because of them.” She looks at the sleeping bear, her face is contorted with worry. “I wish I could do more to help her.”

“Do ya think yer sleep magic is part of the nightmares?” Violetta asks, curiously. “It ain’t a natural sleep yer putting her under.”

Brenda’s face darkens, “Excuse me?” She turns to the crow, offended. “I assure you it’s nothing of the sort!” Another wave of fatigue washes over the two sinners. “I’m afraid I’ll have to ask you two to leave. I need to concentrate on my patient.” She nearly spits, walking to the door and opening it. “I will let you know when she is ready for visitors. Goodbye.” On that parting note, Brenda shoves Violetta and Alastor out of the bedroom and slams the door.

The duo stare at the closed door and then to each other. “The fuck is her problem?” Violetta snaps, hotly. “All I did was ask a simple question!”

Adjusting his red coat, Alastor glares, “Indeed.” He hisses, livid that the woman had the gall to put her hoofs on the Radio Demon. “I believe the good nurse is doing more to Sojourner than what’s necessary.” Intense feedback radiates off the demon as he snaps his fingers. His shadow appears before him, an eerie grin sits on its face. “Investigate.” Alastor orders as he sends the creature underneath the door.

“Let’s see what Nurse Brenda is really doing.”

Notes:

I hope y'all have good finger strength becaaaauusssee CLIFFHANGER BABY! Mwahahaha! Next update will be in the next 5-7 days! I'll see y'all next week!

Chapter 82: Mother Dear

Summary:

Alastor and Violetta investigate the suspicious nurse Brenda after she rushed them out of Sojourner's bedroom. What they find will a battle of who's the better magician. Alastor gets a glimpse into his past and someone he's missed for over a century.

Notes:

Y'all I had FUN with this one! I used my trusted D&D dice to give you my favorite fight scene to date.

TW: GROTESQUE BODY MUTILATION, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, PSYCHOLOGICAL TORMENT, GRAPHIC VIOLENCE,
CW: RACIAL SLURS

Date: June 21, 2026

Age: Much older than you would think

Location: Outside of Sojourner’s Bedroom

Weather: Not the biggest concern right now

Current Conditions: Something funky is going on and Vi and Alastor will get to the bottom of it.

 

“Are they gone?” A voice whispers from the closet, glowing lime green eyes peer from the darkness. 

“Yeah, they’re gone. I told you to take it easy, Nyle!” Brenda hisses, walking over to the closet door. “I said wittle her away little by little, not swallow her whole!”

A lanky, gray skinned man slinks into the room. His dark blue fins resemble a mohawk as black and dark gray scales adorn his face. Webbed fingers brush Brenda’s hair away from her face. “Sorry, baby. I got carried away.” The infester demon purrs, planting a kiss on his girlfriend’s forehead. “You weren’t kidding when you said she’s prime suffering material.” He pulls Brenda into his arms and nuzzles the top of her head. “She’s delicious!”

The nurse pouts, “But I’m the most delicious!” She argues, instantly jealous. Nyle pulls in a satisfied groan, drinking in her insecurity.

“Of course, you are sweetie.” He hums, resting his chin on her head. “Of course.” 

Brenda hugs him tighter, “What makes her tasty anyways?” She glares at the panting sinner, sweat pours off her forehead. “Stupid bear.” She hisses.

Nyle lifts Brenda up and twirls her around. “Oh, there’s so much pain that she’s hidden away! Abuse, neglect, grief, and so much hatred pushed down to such dark depths!” He laughs giddily, “She’s a buffet of repression and self-loathing, her family did such a number on her! Lost childhood, dead mom, broken family, shame, constantly compared to her step-mom, forced to be a servant.” The infester drools, “It’s like eating a murderous Cinderella!”

The nurse glares at her boyfriend, irritated at his excitement. “Well, keep it together. We have to make it look like she’s succumbing to her injuries, not devoured all at once.”

“Sure thing, sweetheart. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” A line of inky saliva drips down his chin, “She’s dreaming about her dad again.” 

On the other side of the door, Alastor has seen enough. “They dare encroach on my territory?” Red eyes turn to ticking dials as he grows twice in size. 

Horrified, Violetta takes a step back, “What?! What’s happenin’?” Instantly worried for her friend inside.

“He’s eating Sojo.” Alastor hisses and breaks the door down. The sight of the infester demon draining Sojourner is in plain view. A black tentacle sprouts from Alastor’s back and strikes the aquatic fiend in the chest, sending him flying into the wall. Brenda screams in horror at the giant red sinner climbing through the doorway.

The somnodemon screeches and sends out spores of sleeping powder at Alastor, but completely misses. Swiping his arm, Alastor backhands Brenda, crushing her against the desk in the corner destroying everything in her wake. Violetta ducks under the larger demon and runs to Sojourner’s bedside, plucking the unconscious woman out of bed and stepping away from Nyle. 

The infester demon clutches his broken ribs, wheezing as black blood drips from his jagged jaw. He lunges for Violetta and Sojourner only to be blocked by Alastor’s large hand wrapping around his torso and squeezing him until more bones break. Nyle can hardly scream as all the air leaves his lungs. 

Brenda sits up in a daze, horrified at the sight of her beloved being crushed to death. In a desperate attempt to save him, she summons a halo of candles around Alastor’s head. The red dials fade to static as the Radio Demon instantly falls asleep. Nyle crumples to the ground in a broken, bloody mess.

“Alastor!” Violetta cries, watching him shrink down to normal size. “Oh, fuck. FUCK!” She whispers, holding Sojourner close to her chest. ‘I can’t leave him with them, they’ll kill him!’ 

Brenda shakily stands up, glaring at the witch. “You BITCH!” She coughs, black blood spills from her lips. “You go under too!” Tears cascading down her face, “DIE!” She sends a halo of candles Violetta’s way. 

Dropping Sojourner, the witch casts a barrier wall between Brenda and the three of them. The candles disintegrate harmlessly against the shield. A glowing red sigil burns in the center of Violetta's chest, searing hot agony erupts in her veins as she cries out in pain. “ALASTOR! WAKE UP!” The crow screams. “I CAN’T HOLD THIS!” 

The static fades from Alastor’s eyes as he lifts his head. “What? What happened?”

Nyle struggles to sit up and locks eyes with Alastor; drool and blood pours from his mouth. “I’ll devour you from the inside…” He hisses, honing in on Alastor’s most recent dream. Lime green eyes flash bright as Nyle leaps into the Radio Demon’s mind. 

“SONUVA BITCH!” Violetta shrieks. “WAKE UP! WHAT KINDA SPELL USA  ARE YA?”

_______________

???, ????

An old-fashioned movie theatre plays black and white images of a young boy playing on a riverbed. A fishing net full of minnows is yanked out of the water as the child laughs. Alastor stares as sweat drips down his temple, why is he seeing this? He tries to move, but tight iron shackles hold him fast. Looking down, the radio host gasps as he sees his light brown, human hands.

“Well, isn’t this lovely?” Nyle’s disembodied voice laughs. “You were such a carefree kid. What happened?” Alastor tries to turn around, but sharp webbed claws hold his chin forward. “What’s wrong? Doncha wanna see Maman?” He teases. 

A first person view of a beautiful, dark-skinned woman fills the screen, her kind, light brown eyes smile down as her hands reach down and hold the pov. Alastor can feel the soft hands caressing his hair and face. ‘Mama.’ Tears instantly well up and pour down his handsome mocha face, water droplets fall on his trousers. Tiny, light-skinned hands reach up and gently touch her face as she comes closer, tracing the deep dimples on her cheeks. Her right eye is swollen shut, her bottom lip is busted open, and her nose is bleeding. 

Alastor’s chest tightens ‘No, no, not this!’ His breathing picks up in a panic, he remembers this day: the day his father disappeared. His mother had hidden him from the drunken man. “Stop this. Now.” His own voice startles him, a heavy Creole accent takes the place of his transatlantic filter.

“StOp ThIs. NoW!” Nyle mocks, cackling in his ear. “What? Don’t wanna see dear Maman get her ass handed to her by your daddy?” He asks as the picture shows a limited view from a closet. His mother’s small body is thrown around the kitchen as a tall man chases her with a knife. “Say, isn’t this where it all began? Your taste for blood?” 

The pov sprints from the closet, a dialogue card appears: “Leave Mama alone!” Little arms wrap around the man’s knees and they fall to the ground. The pov is thrown back as half the view goes blurry then black on the right side. Pain explodes on the right side of Alastor’s face like he has just been struck.

Alastor feels cold, slick fingers play with his monocle. “So this thing isn’t just for show? Interesting.” Nyle muses as he straightens the bow tie around the human’s neck. “Oh, here it comes! Your first bite!”

Large hands go to wrap around the pov’s neck. There’s a struggle then pale hands fly back with a thumb missing and blood spraying everywhere. Alastor can taste the bitter metallic flavor of that cursed man’s blood flooding his mouth, he spits it out onto the ground, gagging. 

Another dialogue card appears: “Mabbie, he swallowed it! The little n*gger swallowed my thumb!” The radio host feels a hard lump rise in his throat. Retching harshly, Alastor chokes and vomits onto his lap, a decayed thumb exits his mouth. On the screen, his mother sits up, “Alastor! Look away, baby!” The glow of the knife’s metal shines in her cocoa hands. The picture goes dark.

In reality, Alastor is convulsing on the floor, a loud, shrill feedback pierces the room. Violetta can’t do anything to help him without the shield dropping. “HELP!” She screams, desperately. It’s as if hellfire is coursing through her veins and alighting every nerve ending.“SOMEBODY HELP US!” Brenda is about to break through as she reels back for another attack.

A tornado of blue flames engulf the demonic nurse, making her writhe and scream as she quickly disintegrates. A small pile of ashes are all that remain.

“Drop the shield!” Michael orders, his golden eyes glow with holy light.

Violetta collapses to her knees, pointing to Nyle. “THIS’N!” The crow chokes out in a tight wheeze. Her limbs feel like lead, her throat is tight with the taste of fire and smoke.

With a swing of his flaming sword, Nyle is no more, destroyed without ever feeling the burn. Alastor sits up in a jolt, taking a deep inhale of breath as he wildly looks around. Sighting Michael and his weapon, he reactively guards Sojourner and Violetta. A buck scream rings out as his growing antlers shatter the 50” television beside them.

With a hard look, Michael instantly extinguishes his sword and dismisses it, holding his hands up. “I’m not your enemy.” He can’t believe those words just left his lips. “The danger is gone, you’re in the hotel.” The deer demon snarls, fighting to regain control. “Alastor, I’m not your enemy.” Michael repeats louder, slowly kneeling down and keeping his hands visible. “It’s me, Michael, I live here too.”

“Hurt…bad…” Alastor struggles to speak in his eldritch form. “Break…bones…” He leans over Sojourner and Violetta, growling at the warrior. He looks down at the broken sailor, visions of his mother take her place for a brief moment. “Keep…safe…”

A pained look consumes the angel’s face. “I…I know…I did hurt her. I didn’t mean to, it was an accident.” He looks at Sojourner’s unconscious body behind the large demon. “I’m not going to hurt anyone.”

The room fills with the scent of pinewood and cedar, a note of lilies floats on top. “G-go home, buck. He ain’t…gon hurt…you.” Violetta falls to the floor, a light screen of smoke wafts off her body. 

Red eyes finally return to normal as Alastor blinks, “What? Wh-where? Where am I?” A creole accent laced with heavy static asks as the overlord looks around. His eyes land on the archangel, kneeling still as a statue.

“Alastor? Are you back?” Michael asks, carefully.

Red dials instantly return as Alastor dissolves into the shadows, leaving Michael alone with the two unconscious women. He runs over and checks on them, seeing no noticeable new injuries from what he can tell. Pulling out his phone, he hesitates to dial. Who should he call? He left without any explanation to Charlie or Lucifer and was gone for days. Wait, why should his brother matter? It’s his niece’s hotel, he should call Charlie. The phone rings.

“Michael?” Lucifer answers, “Are you back?” The sounds of splashing and laughter is heard in the background. Shocking himself, Michael stutters into silence. “Michael? Are you at the hotel? Hang on, I’m coming.” A portal opens to the lobby. “I’ll be right back, sweetie! I gotta go check on something!” Lucifer says to Charlie, he looks like he went ten rounds with a rainbow as he wipes orange paint off his lips.

Snapping his clothes clean, he closes the portal and looks around. ‘Where is he?’ The king feels a pull in his chest, something’s wrong. “Michael, where are you?” He calls out, running up the stairs. His twin meets him at the top, shaken. 

The archangel doesn’t even remember running out the room, but it doesn’t really matter. One look is all it takes for Lucifer to follow him back to Sojourner’s room without question. “Oooohh, shit…” The king whispers as he takes on the desecrated state of the sailor’s bedroom. He kneels down between the new sinner and his dear friend and checks on both of them.

“I didn’t hurt them.” Michael says, finally finding his voice, it’s small. His nervous hands tightly grip the bottom of his vest and twist the fabric.

Lucifer turns to him with a pained look on his face.

“I know.”

Notes:

Soooo what did y'all thiiiinnk? I had such a good time writing this chapter. Give a little insight into my version of Alastor's history.

Chapter 83: You Remind Me

Summary:

Violetta wakes up from the battle with unpleasant memories of her own. She finds out what's happening with Sojourner and does everything in her power to help!

Notes:

I love this Appalachian witchy bird! I'll let you know when my friend is ready to post Vi's story, until then you'll only get the surface of her amazing character!

Date: June 23, 2026

Age: A very old, young lady

Location: Hazbin Hotel- Guest Room

Weather: It’s hot outside

Current Conditions: Waking up from a dream that was hyuckin’ crazy

“The jury finds the Violetta Morgan guilty of sundry acts of witchcraft, the murder of her father, Obadaiah Morgan, and for cohabiting with a n*gro.”

“For your many crimes, Miss Morgan, you are hereby sentenced to be hung around the neck until dead. May the almighty God have mercy on your soul.”

 

Red eyes snap open, the tears lining them threaten to slip down gray skin as rapid pants heave a busty chest up and down.

“Woah! Easy there, babe. Ya doin’ alright?” A distinct accent asks.

Violetta looks to the side to see a very tall figure with multiple limbs holding pairs of hands up. Blinking her scarlet eyes clear, the face looking back at her is actually quite beautiful. “Wha? Wher- Sojo!” The crow bolts up with a start. “Where’s Soj- uhn~” The room spins.

Angel places his hands on the witch’s shoulders, guiding her back down. “Ay, ay, ay, relax! She’s in another room!” The dancer soothes. “Codouroy is doin’ as fine as she can be.”

Violetta groans, she hasn’t felt this bad since the second time she woke up in Hell. “What in the fuck smells like smoke?” Her throat is scorched, the question is nearly coughed out.

“You.” Angel answers pointedly as he hands her a glass of water. “Ya stink like the aftermath of a fire. No offense, but that smoke smell is really strong.”

The witch downs the glass in four large gulps, ready for more. Angel Dust chuckles, “Goddamn, can ya throw liquor back like that?” Refilling her glass.

Violetta chugs the water again before answering. “Depends on the hooch, but yeah.” Her Appalachian accent is clear now that she’s not dying of thirst.

“Hooch? Now that’s a word ya don’t hear very often!” The spider laughs. “How deep in the woods did ya live in before ya kicked it?” Angel smiles, already warming up to the stranger.

“Honey, deeper and longer than anyone can claim. That, I can guarantee.” The crow sinner grins. She holds out her hand, “Violetta Morgan, mighty fine to meet ya.”

“Angel Dust. Right backatcha.” The first resident replies as he shakes her hand. “Ya feeling okay? Charlie’s got some questions for ya.”

‘Charlie? Who the hell is Charlie?’ The witch wonders, tilting her head. “Uh, who?”

Knock, knock, knock

Angel goes to answer the door and cracks it open. “Is she awake? Dad made pancakes!” A hushed whisper asks.

“Yeah, toots, she’s awake, hang on.” Angel tilts his head back, “Hey, Vi, you up for visitors? Got some pancakes for ya.”

Perking up, Violetta slowly sits up in bed, “Sure, I’m starved.”

Angel opens the door all the way and Charlie walks in with a tray full of pancakes, syrup, whipped cream, and fresh fruit. The dancer plucks a strawberry off the tray before sitting back down.

“Hey, this food is for her!” Charlie scolds as Angel winks at Violetta before popping the berry into his mouth. The witch grins back, the spider is quickly growing on her. The princess carefully places the food down on Violetta’s lap. “Hi, I’m Charlie, owner of the Hazbin Hotel! How are you feeling?”

The crow smiles at the sweet woman. “Violetta Morgan, pleased to meet ya, princess. I apologize for the smell.” She laughs, embarrassed. 

Charlie waves dismissively, “Don’t even worry about it! If anything, I should apologize to you for what you had to go through yesterday!” The princess’s face falls. “To think Brenda was hurting Sojo and I didn’t even notice.” Shame settles on her pretty features.

Violetta places her hand over Charlie’s. “That lady was as slippery as her eel sweetheart, pretendin’ to fuss over Sojo like that.” The witch frowns. “Honestly, if she hadn’t gotten all huffy when I asked her ‘bout her sleep magic, Alastor and I prolly’ wouldn’t’a noticed neither.” 

“Still…” Charlie trails off. “Wait, you could tell Brenda was using magic?”

The Appalachian looks off to the side, “Yeah, sorta.” She mumbles, she hadn’t meant to let that slip. “Sojo cried fer help and when Alastor and I ran in, Brenda had already put her to sleep.” She remembers how the room spun as she stepped inside. “It threw me and Al fer a loop, so I cain’t imagine how hard she was goin’ in on Sojo.”

“Has she woken up yet?” Angel asks quietly, looking away from the two women. Charlie shakes her head solemnly. “Shit.” He whispers, anger sears through him as his long arms cross tightly over his torso. “And neither ya uncle or ya dad can fix it?”

Charlie looks up to Angel’s face, she wants to curl up in shame. “Because of her…condition. It’s too risky to try anything with their powers.”

Violetta chews a bite of her sticky pancakes as she looks between the two demons, “Pardon me if I’m oversteppin’, but what condition could Sojo have that yer dad cain’t fix?” Licking a drop of syrup off her pinky. “I mean, ain’t he the Devil?”

Sighing heavily, Charlie stares at her hands, carefully choosing her words. “Sojo…was struck by a holy weapon and now has Grace inside her. It makes her body…weaker than other sinners and gives her back all her human ailments.”

“I suppose that would also mean she doesn’t do all that well with magic then, huh?” Violetta asks. Her heart sinks when Charlie confirms with a nod. 

“She has the body of a demon with the fragility of a human because of the heavenly Grace. If dad or Uncle Mike introduce more divine magic to her system, she could…” Tears well up in Charlie’s eyes, Angel slips his hand around her shoulders and pulls her into his side.

“Sojo could stay asleep for good.” Angel finishes for his friend. “No regeneration.” His voice is small.

The sweet pastries turn sour in the witch’s stomach. She likes the bear sinner, the two of them hit off right away when they met and became instant friends. The way Sojourner trusted Violetta to save her when she was eaten by the pitcher plant resonates with the witch. It would’ve been hell to pay for the witch had the sailor simply chosen to kill the plant to escape. But she remained calm and obeyed Violetta’s instructions, saving her own life, the plant’s, and the crow’s skin. 

Then when Sojourner cut her a break on fixing her crap apartment by accepting trades, Vi swore that she would do what she could to look out for the small bear. Time to pay up.

“Can I give it a try?” The crow asked, getting Charlie’s and Angel’s attention. “Waking her up, I mean.”

Sniffling, the princess wipes a tear from her red and yellow eyes. “You don’t have to. This is our problem.” She says softly. “You’ve already done more than enough by risking yourself to protect Alastor and Sojo.”

Placing the tray aside, Violetta tosses back the covers and swings her legs over the sides. “It may not necessarily be my problem, but Sojourner is my friend too.” She looks at the two residents in the eyes determinedly. “And I promised myself I’d look after her a while ago.” Visions of a young human woman smiling flash in her mind. Her heart weighs down with grief. “She reminds me of…someone I used to know.” ‘Abigail.’ 

Angel studies the distant look in Vi’s face. ‘Must’ve been someone really important if she’s making that kinda face.’ He squeezes Charlie’s elbow, making her look up. “I say we give it a shot. We’re stuck for answers anyways.” 

The demon royal draws in a deep breath and nods. “Okay.” She stands up, wiping her tears with the long red sleeve of her blazer. “I’ll take you to her.”

Violetta reties the dark violet feathers on her head into a high ponytail before pulling on her boots. “Lead the way, princess.”

‘I ain’t losin’ this’n.’

Notes:

I can say this Violetta has developed a protective older sister relationship with Sojourner. Apparently, Sojo and Vi's little sister Abigail share things in common that witch misses terribly.

Chapter 84: Dream Drop Demon

Summary:

Sojourner enjoys a nice afternoon with her friends when she gets an unexpected visitor. Is this real or a dream?

Notes:

I made myself cry with this chapter and almost axed it. It seemed to cruel for Sojo and let's be honest, baby girl could really use a break. But after three rewrites and a last minute add-on I feel like this will further the story in the long run

Date: June 23, 2026

Age: Comatose dead 30 year old

Location: Tone-Death Paintshop

Weather: BBQ Weather, Baby

Current Conditions: Watching dumb men fight over a grill

Under the umbrella, Sojourner and Eggy lounge in lawn chairs and watch in amusement as Toner, Byson, and the rest of the paint crew argue over who gets to be grill master. The women giggle and clink their drinks together before taking sips of their peach Bellinis, it's the most refreshing drink Sojourner has ever had. She detects notes of peppermint, ginseng, and green tea for some reason, but it doesn’t matter, it tastes so good.

“It’s my damn grill, therefore, I weld the spatula!” Toner snaps, holding the grilling utensil close to his chest. 

Byson glares. “I’m the one who said we should grill in the first place, and it’s “wield”, not "weld"!” The ox retorts, reaching over Toner to grab at the utensil.

The men continue arguing while Sojourner and Eggy nibble on fresh fruit and cheese. Another lawn chair unfolds beside the bear, Penny sighs and crosses her bandaged legs before lifting her drink to her two friends. They grin and clink their drinks together before sitting back and enjoying the chaos.

“I own an actual restaurant, I’m grilling.” Russell declares as he ties his deli apron around his waist and puffs his chest out.

Byson rolls his eyes. “You don’t have a restaurant, you barely work a deli.” He snorts as some of the other painters chuckle in agreement.

The falcon’s feathers rustle. “And if you want to keep your special perks, you’ll watch your mouth, youngster!” Russell threatens, snapping the tongs at the ox sinner. “That’s the problem with you young folks, today! No sense of respect for your elders! Why, back in my day…”

“Oh, not this again, Chair Force.” Gunny groans, walking up beside the ladies and settiing down a cooler. He fishes out a beer. “Can’t we go on one outing without you borin’ us to tears ‘bout ancient times?” The beer cracks loudly, spilling foam over his fingers.

Russell sputters. “Ancient times! You dumb kids wouldn’t last two minutes when I was serving…” 

"Squid, where'd you find this old bird?" He grins, giving her a wink.

Sojourner stares in awe at her best friend. “G-Gunny? What are you doing here?” She asks, stunned.

The marine cocks an eyebrow. “Whaddaya mean? We planned this barbeque for weeks.” He takes a pull off his beverage.

Her mouth falls open for a reply, but nothing comes out. “No, no, I m-mean…is it really you?” How is this possible? Isn’t he supposed to be…

Gunny snorts, lowering his drink and nodding. “Uh, yeah? Is it really you?” Sojourner’s acting weird, but he’ll play along. 

Eggy tilts her head. “Honey Bear, are you okay? Ya look like you’re seeing a ghost.” 

Sojourner turns toward the baker. “Y’all see him, right?” Pointing to the German Shepherd. What the hell is going on? How the fuck is Gunny here?

Toner is confused. “Si, we see him. What’s going on, Mamí? You’re acting strange, he's been here.” The group mumbles in agreement. Why is she so shocked at seeing her best friend? They live together for crying out loud.

Gunny places his large hand on the bear’s forehead. “Is it too hot out here, Squid? Ya need to go cool off inside?” The bear nearly jumps out of her chair at his touch. He smells like cayenne and sage.

With shaking hands, Sojourner touches Gunny’s arm, she can feel it. Red and green eyes look up to her friend’s face, light shines in his rich, green eyes. ‘I can feel him.’ Is this real? Is it really him? Sniff, sniff. A tear falls, then another.

“Hey, woah, woah! Why the tears? What’s the matter?” The marine asks, panicked. “I ain’t making fun of ya, I’m wonderin’ if yer too hot out here!” He looks back towards Toner who has an equally shocked look on his face? What the fuck is Sojo crying about?

Penny gently places her hand on Sojourner’s back. “Sojo, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” Deeply concerned about her dear friend’s severe shift in mood. The sharp scent of menthol stings Sojourner’s nose and eyes.

The small bear pulls Gunny’s hand to her face and presses her cheek into his palm, it’s warm. “You’re really here?” She asks in a wavering voice. Is this really happening? Is he truly back with her?

He kneels down in front of his friend as she clings to him. “Yeah, gal, I’m right here. What’s goin’ on?” Heavy eyebrows leap up when Sojourner throws her arms around his neck. “Squid, we drove here together. What are ya trippin’ up about?” Tentatively, Gunny places his hands on her back. “Yer actin’ like ya haven’t seen me in years, it’s kinda freakin’ me out.” He chuckles nervously, her behaviour is really starting to worry him.

The statement sends a fresh wave of tears down Sojourner’s face. “I-I thought…” She sobs and squeezes him tighter. Words are an impossibility for her right now, she doesn’t know how to feel. He smells like life, vibrant and buzzing with energy. Rosemary and ginger flood her senses as she buries her nose into his neck.

Toner quietly clears his throat to get Penny and his wife’s attention, motioning behind him to give the pair some privacy. The women tiptoe away with blended expressions of confusion and worry. The crowd retreats to the garage, standing by to see what happens next.

“Sojo.” Gunny says, gently pulling away to look her in the face. “Talk to me.” His eyes drift to her hands clutching his shorts sleeves in an iron grip. “Breathe, gal. It’s okay.”

Shaking her head furiously. “No! It isn’t okay! I lost you!” She cries. “I’ve been living for years without you!” Blood rushes in her ears. “Y-you died!” Was that all just a bad dream? Someone please tell her it’s been all a bad dream.

Gunny swipes his thumb through her tears. “Nah, gal. Look at me.” Calming her breath, Sojourner looks at him, his scent of rosemary and ginger makes her jittery. He smiles a cheeky grin. “I’m right here, I’m alive!” His tail wags.

“No, I’m not.” A disembodied voice counters.

Sojourner jumps, what was that just now? “Y-you…” She looks around, that was so close to her.

The marine holds her face in both of his hands, focusing all her attention on him. “I’m alive, Sojo. Say it back.” The sailor takes a few steadying breaths then opens her mouth to repeat. The returning scent of cayenne makes her skin tingle.

“That’s not true…” The voice says. 

She hesitates, there it is again. “Y-you’re al-” Who the fuck is saying that?

“Sojourner, wake up.” It orders. Sojourner knows that voice all too well, she looks around. Chester?

“Hey.” Gunny says, gently. He tilts his head to get her eyes back. “C’mon, Squid, say it back. I need you to say it.” She meets his gaze. Rich, green emeralds stare back at her with a warmth she can’t describe. “Say it.” He pleads, there’s a desperation to his voice. The earthy musk of sage wafts over her, making it hard to concentrate.

“This ain’t real, Squid. Ya know that.” The voice says firmly. “Ya gotta say no.”

Her eyes flood with tears, why does she hear Chester’s voice if he’s right here in front of her? What does he mean this isn’t real? This has to be real, she’s holding him in her hands, she can feel his touch. 

‘Ya gotta leave, Squid. Ya cain’t stay here.’ The marine's voice is heavy with grief.

“B-but,” Sojourner whispers. “But, why?” It isn’t fair, why can’t she stay like this? “I want to stay…” She whimpers.

Gunny’s face creases in sadness. “You can stay.” His voice is so small. “It can be like it was again.”

Again? Wasn’t it like this always? What does Chester mean by-? Flashes of the sword piercing his chest, the blood down the front of his uniform… The sharp sting of copper pierces her nose.

“Sojo.” Gunny presses his lips to hers in a long, gentle kiss, stunning Sojourner for a moment before she kisses back. He pulls away. “I need you to stay.” The marine sounds as if he’s holding on by a thread. Her arms feel heavy and achy, this isn’t right.

Slowly, Sojourner shakes her head. What is she doing? They can be together again, she can have the life she deserves with him. She pulls the warm hands off her face and brings them to her lips, giving each a lingering kiss. Tall ears fall to the sides, devastation displayed everywhere on the marine’s body. 

“I have to go.” She says breathlessly, standing and pulling him up with her. Her thumbs rub the soft fur on his knuckles. “I want to stay with you. But you’re no longer here, are you?”

A somber whine leaves Gunny’s throat. “I’m not.” He squeezes her hands. A bright flash of light appears beside the duo, a stunning scarlet carpet with yellow trim trails up to a set of double red doors with flashing yellow lights.

Looking back up at her best friend, Sojourner can’t hold back her tears, “I think about you everyday. I realized what we could've had far too late.” She confesses, drinking in his features. 

The marine chuckles and sniffles, tears lining his rich, green eyes. “I ain’t much to think about, Squid.” He runs one of her front braids through his hand. “Save that for someone who’s earned it.”

Their heads turn as the doors open wide, voices can be heard from the other side. Voices that Sojourner has come to know and love very much.

“Come visit me once in a while?” She asks, cocking an eye up to the tall marine.

“Sure, if I got the time.” Gunny jokes as he walks her to the entrance. Releasing her hand, he watches her take the last few steps. “Hey.” He calls out, making her turn around. “Thanks fer keepin’ our promise.” Pride is clear in his eyes.

Sojourner takes in his features one last time, “I’ll always love you, Devil Dog.” She vows.

“That’s why I’m a happy man.” He replies, lifting a hand. “I’ll see you around, Squid.”

“See ya.” Sojourner walks through.

____________________

Mismatched eyes pop open. A bundle of herbs dangle above her head with pouches of spices lining her pillow. “Da fuck?” She asks, sitting up and pushing the plants away.

An excited gasp fills the room. “Y’ALL, SHE’S AWAKE!” A heavy southern accent shout.

“Vi?” The bear asks, confused. “What are you doing he-” The door bursts open.

“Sojo!” A giddy voice cheers, cutting Sojourner off. “YOU’RE OKAY!” A sudden weight pushes all the air out the small bear’s lungs with an oof! Long arms squeeze around Sojourner’s neck as she’s pulled into a tight hug.

Smiling, the bear replies. “Hi, Charlie.” Nuzzling into her friend’s shoulder while the princess sobs.

Baby, I would die a happy man.

Oh. 

‘That’s what he meant.’

It was nice while it lasted, she supposes.

__________________

???,????, A little pond in a lovely zen garden

“Was it nice to see her?” A gentle voice asks.

Chester turns around and smiles at the blonde woman approaching him. “Yeah, it was great.” Accepting the glass of crisp lemonade handed to him, he heaves a long sigh as his companion takes a seat beside him in front of the water. “Ya do this with yer kiddos, Eve?”

“Mostly my oldest, Cain. He needs it the most.” Picking up a floating lily, the woman smiles as she thinks about her children. “Abel and Seth are in Heaven, though I wished they would talk to each other. I wasn’t able to reach any of my children while Roo had me captive.” She shudders and drops the flower back in the water.

The marine frowns. “Still gettin’ nightmares?” He asks, watching her shiver.

Biting the inside of her cheek, Eve looks off to the side. “From time to time, but They help a lot, you do too.” Dipping a pale toe into the cool water, small fish come to investigate. 

Chester blows out a long breath. “I still can’t believe They actually exist! Definitely ain't who or what I expected Them to be.” He still can’t fathom that he’s here, wherever or whenever ‘here’ is. All he remembers before waking up here is falling asleep in Sojourner’s arms. “I mean, I know I died…again. But I didn’t expect to end up here with Them, certainly wasn’t spectin’ to be meeting you, neither.”

A sympathetic smile stretches across Eve’s face. “The last thing I remember is sitting in a dirty place with Cain. I don’t know why, but I know I wasn’t allowed to touch him or something terrible would happen.” Tears line her eyes. “He looked so sad and alone and I couldn’t help him. My poor baby.” Her voice breaks as Chester wraps his arm around her shoulder and pulls her in for a hug. 

“Squid was crying the last time I saw her, too.” Gunny laments, sadly. “I knew I was gonna die, but I was fine just bein’ with her til the end.” He squeezes Eve closer to his side. “I wasn’t ready for her to actually consider throwin’ in the towel because o’ me.”

Wiping her eyes, “You’re her everything, Chester. Of course she wants to be with you again.” Resting her head on his broad shoulder. “She’s tired of being strong, just like my Cain.”

“Indeed, but their stories aren’t complete yet.” A voice speaks in their hearts. “And I need the two of you to keep watch over them as I know you will.” Chester and Eve smile and nod.

After all, what are guardian angels for?

Notes:

The power of aromatherapy, right, y'all? Also our favorite marine is, technically not alive, but he's doing alright. And we know where Eve went now, not really.