Mutations in the Rumor Mill

by Bodldops

Summary:

Everyone says that Lan Qiren hated Cangse Sanren. Everyone knows that as fact.

Or, at least, everyone has heard that repeated as fact.

Lan Qiren never bothered to tell anyone otherwise. He regrets doing so.

(This work is finished, remaining chapters will be posted every Tuesday!)

Chapter 1

Lan Qiren had not thrown his teacup when he received a letter from Wei Changze and  Cangse Sanren. That was an exaggeration that had somehow made its way into the world and could not be eradicated. After all, he rather liked that tea set. He had been upset, however. Why would those two even suggest that he be responsible for raising their child? They were both capable cultivators, but they were unruly in a way that did not mesh with Lan teachings - how could their child ever hope to thrive here? How could they ask him to take on one more small life, when he already had two he felt he was hopelessly fumbling in his hands. It was preposterous. It was never going to be needed. He didn't send a reply, not that he would have known where to send it. Those two abhorred staying in a place longer than it took to try the offerings of every street vendor in town.

Lan Qiren had not shouted when Wei Changze and Cangse Sanren died. This was because he had not known. He had not ranted about the fitting ends of someone who could not meld with society and someone who reached above their station - how could he have, when he only received letters from them every few months, and saw them only once a year at best? He just thought a letter had been waylaid, easy enough to do in this wild world.

Lan Qiren had not disregarded the fate of their child. He had not known the child was in danger, not for nearly a year, and then had every to believe the child had died alongside his parents. He did not openly grieve them, as it was forbidden by the sect laws, but he did, in fact, grieve them. Wei Changze. Cangse Sanren. Wei Ying, who was barely a toddler. He looked at the two boys who would grow up and forget the chaotic rogue cultivators who sent them presents and pinched their cheeks, and missed the little one with the sunny gap-toothed smile who ran with unsteady steps after Lan Zhan the handful of times they'd met.

Lan Qiren had not scoffed when he heard Jiang Fengmian had brought an orphan child into the Jiang Sect to raise alongside his own children. He'd been irate. He'd been heartbroken. He'd been filled with self-loathing - how could he not have known? How could Jiang Fengmian have known, and he did not? How could Jiang Fengmian know where to look for the child, but not know the stated wishes of the parents? He thought to potentially argue to have Wei Ying brought to Cloud Recesses, but...

But.

But, it had been his father's sect. It was a sect more given to freedom of expression and loud laughter. It was a sect where Wei Ying might be happy.

Lan Qiren thought about what the sect elders might do to a child used to the open road and a set of free-thinking parents.

He didn't protest Wei Ying becoming a Jiang disciple. Perhaps there was a reason he hadn't known to look, after all.

 

---

 

Wei Wuxian was nervous, though he had done his absolute best over the last few days to make sure no one had any idea.  Jiang Cheng and shijie had only heard him bemoan the fabled lack of spices in Lan cooking, and ramble on about what spots of interest there were in Caiyi Town.  There'd already been enough drama about him attending the lectures at Gusu Lan without adding more to the mix. Sect Leader Jiang had taken it as a matter of course that Wei Wuxian would go.

Madam Yu had been less than enthused about this plan, to say the least.

For once Uncle Jiang wouldn't be swayed, however, and though the last few weeks had been horribly uncomfortable for Wei Wuxian with Madam Yu's fury soaring to new heights, he was actually allowed to come. He was so very proud of this, of course, it was a honor.

He was, however, also very nervous. He'd heard all his life since coming to Lotus Pier that of all the sects, he would have had the hardest time in Gusu Lan. He was told all the time that he should thank all of his ancestors that it was Uncle Jiang to find him in Yiling, and that he should be extra especially thankful to be part of the Jiang - who else would put up with him? He knew he was blessed, and did give thanks frequently.

And now here he was, about to spend a year in the sect who reportedly would be least tolerant of every single aspect of his personality. It was terribly daunting! Still, he hoped that he could keep out of trouble enough to be allowed access to the library. Everyone knew that the library at Cloud Recesses was the best in the cultivation world. Wei Wuxian had already read everything in the library at Lotus Pier at least twice, even the horrifically dry histories, just to have something to stave off boredom after training.

Their trip to Cloud Recesses would be a hilarious comedy of errors if it wasn't directly causing his shijie unhappiness - there was more evidence that her fiancé was the most useless and conceited man in existence (and he certainly didn't and never would deserve her), there was the lost entry invitation, there was the way they were epically snubbed by the Second Jade of Lan... honestly, if he'd been watching this in a play, he would have laughed the loudest.

He wasn't laughing.

He was running. He knew the Lan shut their gates at their own ridiculously early curfew, and thus he was sprinting up the stairs as fast as he could manage. He had the invitation, and he also had a few jars of Emperor's Smile to share with Jiang Cheng once they were shown to their rooms. He just had to get there in time.

He actually wasn't sure what time it was. It'd seemed plenty early when he left Caiyi Town, but the mountain's bulk made the dark come sooner. It didn't feel late, but given his night-owl habits, not many times felt late to him.

When he arrived at the gate, he knew he had a problem. There weren't any guards at the gate anymore, only a shimmering ward. There also weren't any Jiang disciples camped outside the gates. Since he'd just come up the steps, and he remembered from his first trip up the hill that there weren't any paths venturing into the surrounding forest, it was most likely that someone inside Cloud Recesses unbent enough to allow the Jiang disciples inside without an invitation. That was fantastic, his shijie shouldn't be forced to camp in the mountain chill!

It just left him alone on the wrong side of the gate.

Idly, he trailed a finger along the ward's boundary, using his qi to trace the intricate spellwork used to form the barrier. It was very elegantly done, if... well. A little predictable. The Lan writings had a certain rhythm to them, a commonality of themes that became signature if you paid attention. This ward followed the same patterns. He could have clocked it as the work of a Lan cultivator while blindfolded.

So it really wasn't anything impressive to figure out a talisman to allow him to slip past the ward. He was careful not to break it, or cause any great disruption - he didn't want to alarm anyone, or leave Cloud Recesses defenseless, after all!  He just had no interest in camping on the side of a mountain when there were warm beds close by.  After all, who would notice one disciple, more or less?  It wasn't like he was anyone particularly important in this setting.  

He was somewhat dismayed to find there are even more stairs on the far side of the gate, climbing up the mountain relentlessly. This clan must have the most strong leg muscles of all, with all this climbing! The moon finally came out from behind the clouds as he climbed, and...

Well.

He can admit it was rather beautiful here. This might be a clan that reputably didn't know how to have fun, but they did have a great eye for design. The angles of the roofline echoed that of the mountain peaks, fitting in perfectly with the scenery. Wei Wuxian decided that since his shidi didn't bother to leave even a message behind for him, he was going to drink Jiang Cheng's share of the Emperor's Smile. Given the shining moon, he's inspired to do so on the rooftops - they look perfect for lounging. Glorious.

He was so caught up in his plan he almost walked directly into a Lan senior. The man was tall, with a slightly scraggly beard (not that he'd ever be so rude as to say so, at least not to the man's face). White robes shouldn't blend in with anything besides snow, but the man stood so still he nearly mistook him for another pillar.  Wei Wuxian rapidly hooked his wine bottles to the back of his belt with a practiced twist before bowing politely.

"Ah, aha, good evening, Lanqianbei. This one is..."

"Wei Wuxian." The man interrupted, then looked slightly disgruntled, for some reason.

"Um. Yes. I... am honored you know of me, Lanqianbei. I was just looking for the Jiang disciples? We got separated, you see." He smiled winsomely, projecting innocence with all of his heart. It wasn't too hard, he hadn't done anything horrible, he's pretty sure. So long as he kept the wine out of sight, he should be fine. He's pretty sure no Lan will be overly fussed about wine he has no intention of sharing with any Lan, but there's no sense tempting fate, right?

"Hand it over."

"Lanqianbei?"

"Whatever it is you're hiding from me. You have the same expression as your mother when you're trying to hide something, and I knew that look well. Don't even bother." The Lan senior reported drily, holding out a hand firmly.

Wei Wuxian handed over his wine without complaint, too distracted by sudden longing.

"You knew my mother, Lanqianbei?" He didn't mean to make the question plaintive, it just came out that way. For all that rumor painted his mother and Uncle Jiang as some sort of lovers, Uncle Jiang never even said her name. That all came from Madam Yu, who never had a kind thing to say. All he had of his parents were a handful of brief memories, most bare impressions - a bright braying laugh, the scrollwork on a sword, the warmth of a hug, the curve of smile. While he wouldn't trade those bits of memory for anything, he desperately wanted to know more.

The Lan senior somehow looked even more pained. Wei Wuxian was terrified that he somehow managed to offend the cultivator with the question, or that he'd only have the same cruel things to say as Madam Yu liked to espouse on the regular.

"Come, we should continue this indoors." The Lan senior decided and, taking the wine, strode further into Cloud Recesses. Hopelessly hooked, Wei Wuxian could only follow. He supposed wherever shijie and Jiang Cheng were, they probably weren't expecting him any time soon.  They could go on waiting for him a little while longer.

Chapter 2

The rooms that the senior lead him to were very well appointed, elegant and tasteful in whites and blues. There were numerous books and scrolls, all neatly organized on the shelves, but this was clearly a scholar's office.

"I am Lan Qiren." The senior introduced himself once they were seated, and he'd set the tea kettle to heat. Wei Wuxian could feel his cheeks paling - every time someone told him how lucky he was to not be a Lan, they mentioned the strictness of Lan Qiren, and the grudge Lan Qiren carried against Cangse Sanren. He hadn't sounded like a man with a grudge just moments ago, but... everyone said so. He'd heard this most of his life.

Wei Wuxian bowed as respectfully as he knew how - if there's one thing Madam Yu's frequent punishments were good for, it was learning how to be very, very respectful.

Lan Qiren looked pleased at that, at least. Or... well, Wei Wuxian was pretty sure that was a pleased expressions. Lans were a bit difficult to read, it turned out. That could be a factor in making the next year difficult. Wei Wuxian relied heavily on reading the expressions of those around him to figure out exactly where the lines of propriety truly were.

"And yes, decades ago, I knew your parents. I may have some stories of them that you haven't heard yet, if you would like them." With elegant, well-practiced motions, Lan Qiren sets the tea to steep.

"Ah... well, I don't... want to bother, um. Anyone. For stories. So. I don't really have many?" He answered, hesitantly, awkwardly. It's not quite the truth. He once asked frequently, to anyone he thought might know.

Madam Yu had put an end to that quickly. There had been no attempts after that.

"I know mother was a rogue cultivator, taught by Baoshen Sanren." Wei Wuxian offered, feeling he had to prove he wasn't somehow being purposefully unfilial. "And father was a servant in the Jiang sect. I remember we had a donkey, at one point. I remember her laugh." At some point his recitation became less factual and more wistful - those memories were just tiny, glittering fragments, and he hoarded them carefully.

"Your mother did love to laugh. Some would say indecorously, but those were usually the same people she was laughing at. She was unflinching in supporting the truth, and had the skills to back her words. She would have been a credit to any sect she chose to join, but she preferred the freedom of making personal choices rather than relying on the sect she belonged to to be honorable for her." Lan Qiren, the person Wei Wuxian had been told for years was the chief amongst all those who disliked his mother, was unstinting in his praise. It floored Wei Wuxian, who accepted the cup of tea Lan Qiren handed him without even looking at it.

It was thus, with him looking as witless as a fish left gasping on the dock, that Wei Wuxian met the most beautiful man in the world a second time. He'd only had a brief interaction at the gates, and he'd been irritated on shijie's behalf at the time, so he hadn't had the wit to recognize that this second Jade of Lan was truly wonderful.

Said beautiful man, after bowing to Lan Qiren, sent a questioning look Wei Wuxian's way.

"I have given him permission to be here, and will make sure he is returned to his quarters later. There is no issue. You may give me your full report in the morning, Lan Wangji." Lan Qiren ordered. Lan Wangji (the most beautiful man had a beautiful name too, that was fitting) didn't look entirely convinced, but he left without complaint.

Lan Qiren harrumphed, breaking into Wei Wuxian's thoughts after he ended up spending too long staring at the closed door Lan Wangji left through.

"I will tell you more about your parents, but I also have a project for you." Lan Qiren announced, and Wei Wuxian sat up straighter. Lectures hadn't even begun, and he had homework?

"You're going to write an explanation of how you got past the wards so I can report to the elders. And then you're going to tell me how to fix the problem." Lan Qiren announced, and Wei Wuxian tensed. Up until very recently, he wouldn't have said he cared about Lan Qiren's opinion. But now?

Now he was terribly anxious that he'd managed to upset this man before he knew that he desperately want to.

"You do remember how you managed it, do you not?" Lan Qiren asked, one eyebrow raised querulously. Wei Wuxian hastened to settle himself again, and nodded. It was maybe (entirely) an over-eager nod, more fitting for a child than a Head Disciple, but he told himself that he's had a very trying night, and frankly he should be rewarded for keeping his wits about him as well as he had.

"Yes, Lanlaoshi." Wei Wuxian answered, with another textbook-perfect bow from where he knelt.

"Very well. I will see to it the librarians know of your project, and will aid you in finding any material you require, excepting any of the forbidden texts. There should be no reason you need those to explain what you did tonight, or to come up with alternates." Lan Qiren added, his tone knowing - as if he'd somehow heard Wei Wuxian's instant thought that he'd love to see what the Lan Sect considered a forbidden book. Before he could think of how to ask politely, Lan Qiren was standing. He hurried to jump to his feet, following Lan Qiren's lead back out into Cloud Recesses. There was a patrol, but they didn't even raise an eyebrow as Lan Qiren led him past. Before too long he was lead to a particular set of quarters, and after a brisk knock at the door, it was Jiang Cheng who appeared.

A Jiang Cheng who very clearly did not expect to be coming face to face with a Lan elder at this hour of the night. His disgruntled expression very quickly disappeared under a panicked sort of politeness, and a hurried bow. Wei Wuxian stifled a giggle behind his hand, knowing that Jiang Cheng would be more than happy to complain later.

"Make sure you are both on time for the presentation ceremony tomorrow, young masters. Good evening." Wei Wuxian made sure his bow as Lan Qiren turned to leave was picture-perfect. It meant that once Lan Qiren was gone, Jiang Cheng was able to snag him by the back of his robes and haul him back into their rooms for the next year before he could do more than squawk.

And then he remembered.

Lan Qiren had his wine.

Well, that was a bit upsetting.

 

---

 

The next few days were very confusing for Wei Wuxian. The lectures...

The lectures were so disappointing. Ever since he learned he would be attending along with the rest of the Jiang convoy, he was excited to learn in the clan known for their scholarship. What he found, however, was a painfully dry recitation of facts. Answers were expected to be directly out of the book, whether a better answer might be available with a with a little bit of thought or not. It dragged at his nerves, and made each day inside the classroom became a unique sort of torture. The only bright spots were whatever nonsense Nie Huiasang came up with, and watching Lan Wangji be icily perfect day after day.

Lan Qiren was also confusing. He did not stand for any disruption of his classroom, or any variation in the answers given to his questions. He seemed to have a sixth sense for when Wei Wuxian was about to try and pull a prank, and always seemed to be ready to intercept it, or squash it before Wei Wuxian could even properly get set up. His expressions in those moments, however, were almost... disappointed? Not that Wei Wuxian was acting up, that seemed almost expected, but... it was odd, too odd to be truth, but the teacher seemed almost disappointed that the pranks weren't more... impressive? Or subtle? It was the first time someone seemed to even suggest that he improve his pranking ability, and Wei Wuxian was deeply thrown. He started spending more time in his notes, trying to come up with a prank that might meet his teacher's bizarrely high standards for such things.

After lectures, however... Jiang Cheng was disappointed, but he had to accept that Lan Qiren had given him a very clear project, and Wei Wuxian was determined to fulfill it to the best of his ability. This gave him free run of the library, which was bliss. Even better, Lan Wangji often arrived while he was there - rumor said he was there to keep Wei Wuxian from creating too much chaos, but whatever the reason was, he was pleased to have the company. Lan Wangji never seemed to mind if Wei Wuxian bounced his ideas off of him - he rarely answered, not really, but he also didn't protest.

And he kept coming back.

After a month, Wei Wuxian finished his project - explaining how he got past the wards was the easy part. Explaining how to keep it from happening again... well, he'd never met any of the Lan clan elders besides Lan Qiren. He didn't know what they'd like. So he came up with three options - different anchors, different ward bases, different ways of keying the wards to those they wanted to allow in.

He tried to keep some of the same themes as the usual Lan work, so it blended well with the existing structures of Cloud Recesses. He made very sure, however, that any attempt to follow the usual course of Lan spellwork would set off some nasty traps. After all, now that he was challenged to it, Wei Wuxian was determined to be the last person to sneak into Cloud Recesses. He had a record to defend now!

It was with some regret that he headed to Lan Qiren's office with his report. Of course, he was excited to spend more time with Jiang Cheng, but it had been... wonderful, in a way he couldn't explain to anyone and not sound horribly ungrateful for his usual life. Which wasn't true! He loved being the Head Disciple of the Jiang, he loved going on night hunts, loved teaching his shidi and shimei, loved having a hand in how Lotus Pier was run and feeling it humming all around him. He just also loved being allowed to explore his creativity, to play with talismans and wards and know there was someone would want to look at the results. Still, he didn't drag his feet as he approached Lan Qiren's office. He was the Head Disciple of Yunmeng Jiang, he knew security was important to each sect, and he since he was the one to bring the weakness in the wards around Cloud Recesses to Lan Qiren's attention (on accident), it was good that he also was able to tell them how to fix them.

He knocked politely on the door, and waited.

The door was opened by the most beautiful man in the world. Lan Wangji gave him a somewhat unimpressed look, no doubt thinking he was here to cause some sort of problem. Someone must have told him about all of the punishments he received in Lotus Pier - he felt that was unfair, he hadn't really done anything truly worthy of punishment while here.

Well.

Other than breaking in.

And fidgeting in class.

And sometimes being caught running.

And sometimes being too loud when Lans felt it should be more quiet.

...

Maybe there were some things.

"Let him enter, Wangji." Lan Qiren called from within, and Lan Wangji obediently stood aside. Wei Wuxian gave him a reassuring grin as he passed. Lan Wangji failed to look reassured. Rude.

"Good afternoon, Lanlaoshi." Wei Wuxian greeted, bowing properly. "I have the report you wanted."

Lan Qiren waved for him to sit, and he did so as gracefully as he could - so much time in the library had left him with some tightness in his lower back that he was going to need to beat out of his muscles on the training field later. Jiang Cheng was going to have fun trouncing him. Lan Qiren frowned - he must have been expecting the report earlier. He tried to be efficient, but there was just so much information in the library - he kept getting new ideas, and had trouble picking out the best ones! As usual, he probably shouldn't have spent so long playing around.

He slid his report across the table, hoping that his very best attempt at good calligraphy would at least earn him some credit. Lan Qiren had already seen enough of his usual handwriting to surely know this was an improvement.

"And when do you expect to have the improvement options completed?" Lan Qiren asked, as he picked up the stack of papers.

"Oh, they're there, they start about ten pages in? There's diagrams as well. If... if that helps." The last time someone had seen any of his ward ideas, it had been Madam Yu, and she'd been so irate he'd even think about messing with Lotus Pier's wards that she'd kept him kneeling in the ancestral hall for over a day. The memory of that particular punishment was making him nervous.

"Wangji." Lan Qiren gestured to the space beside him, and as finished each page, he handed it off to Lan Wangji. Wei Wuxian's nervousness doubled - was that good? Was it bad? Was he about to be thrown out for daring to suggest such drastic changes? He didn't want to go. While the lectures weren't anything like he expected, but everything else? Sure, there were more rules than anyone could be expected to remember in one lifetime, but the punishments for breaking said rules were reasonable, and predictable. Cloud Recesses was calm and orderly. The food was atrocious, but Caiyi Town was right there, and he'd already found an inn that served food spicy enough to even challenge him.

He kept any pleading to be allowed to stay behind his teeth. He absolutely refused to beg. He'd done his best - if that wasn't good enough... maybe it was better if he left.

(Madam Yu would be so furious)

He surfaced from his own thoughts to realize the two Lan were watching him curiously. All of the papers were neatly stacked again, once again in Lan Qiren's hands. Had they said something and he missed it? He might have. They looked expectant.

"Um. So..." He waffled, trying to figure out how to ask what was said without asking. He didn't want to make it obvious that he hadn't been listening at all.

"Wei Wuxian!" Lan Qiren barked, and Wei Wuxian straightened sharply. "I asked who helped you?"

"... some of the librarians helped me find some of the books I used as reference?" Wei Wuxian hedged, not entirely sure what Lan Qiren meant. "And Lan Wangji was kind enough to let me bounce ideas off him, that was very helpful."

"You did all of this, yourself, in a month?" Lan Qiren sounded confused, but at least it seemed they were now on the same page. He was, however, extremely leery about veering away from the truth at all when this felt so potentially dangerous. The hesitation earned a narrowed look from Lan Qiren.

"Wei Wuxian?" The question was stern, but not entirely unkind. Wei Wuxian decided to risk it.

"Well, there were a few other ideas for the wards, but I didn't think they were as good as these, so I left them out. I could go get them, if you like. I haven't written a clean copy for them though, so... um. I think they're legible?" He offered, worried. Would Lan Qiren be upset he hadn't given up all of the material? Madam Yu would have accused him of withholding vital information. He supposed it could be that.

"I would be interested in seeing them. At a different time, sit down, Wei Wuxian." Lan Qiren hurried to add when Wei Wuxian moved to push himself up immediately. "Have you slept at all?"

"... As much as usual? Or, I guess, a little less? But I don't usually have to get up so early in Lotus Pier, so... there's that?" Wei Wuxian was thrown by the question - was some of his logic in the ward development wonky? He knew the flavor of his thoughts when he was sleep deprived, and he hadn't ever felt like that, really.

"Young master Wei, if you are capable of work like this, why aren't you excelling in class?" Lan Qiren asked. Wei Wuxian tried not to grimace. He'd hoped it wouldn't come up. Jiang Cheng spent enough time giving him grief for how many times he'd been lectured about fiddling around with his scribbled ideas and theorizing outside the bounds of the class and just generally being himself.

"Um. I mean. It's just..." He sighed - there was no way to say this that wouldn't be taken badly. He hoped the Lan didn't go in for whipping. He was enjoying the break.

"I'm bored? I'm sorry, Lanlaoshi, I've known everything we've gone over, other than the Lan sect rules, for years." He refused to cringe when he said it, presenting the thickest face he could.

The silence after his honest explanation was absolute. It stretched on for what felt like eons, and it took every scrap of restraint Wei Wuxian had ever developed to keep him from fidgeting or adding more to his explanation. It was so quiet, he could hear Nie Huaisang complaining somewhere nearby about being dragged off to the training grounds.

"My apologies, Young Master Wei. I should have recognized you were getting bored - I will adjust your assignments accordingly. You may want to warn Young Master Nie that he will no longer be able to use your test answers to help himself along, as you will be receiving the same tests as Lan Wangji from now on." Wei Wuxian blinked, not sure if he should be more impressed that Lan Wangji was also in a more advanced class, or worried that Lan Qiren had spotted his attempts to help Nie Huaisang through tests.

"Now, you are to spend the rest of the day resting, after you see the healers." Lan Qiren ordered, "And after class tomorrow I will give you the reward you were promised."

"... The healers?" Wei Wuxian asked, confused. "Is Jiang Yanli alright?" His worry spiked - he knew Jiang Cheng was fine, he'd seen his shidi right before coming here, so it must be shijie.

"Jiang Yanli?" Lan Qiren echoed, clearly confused. Wei Wuxian blinked, confused right back at him.

"Well, I know Jiang Ch... Wanyin is fine, I just saw him, so it must be shijie at the healers?" He offered, not at all sure where his logic would be flawed here.

"She is fine, as far as I know. But you should not be moving like that at the level of cultivation you should be for your age and evident talent." Wei Wuxian opened his mouth to protest, but he didn't really have a good excuse. The observation wasn't anything that any half-decent trainer wouldn't have said. He would have also sent any of his shidi or shimei that moved awkwardly during what should be every-day motions off to the healers to make sure there weren't underlying issues.

"Ah. Yes, Lanlaoshi." He agreed - he wasn't unfamiliar with trips to the healers as a disciple who was frequently sent on night hunts. He would just explain what had gone wrong, and be sent off for rest, maybe with some sort of absolutely foul tea. No problem.

Chapter 3

"Lan Wangji, please accompany Young Master Wei to show him the way, and then please let your brother know I would like to see him." Both Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji bowed politely, and with that, the interview was over. Wei Wuxian practically skipped into the sunshine, grinning at Lan Wangji's disapproving look.

"Lan Wangji, we'll be studying the same things now! Are you excited? It will be fun, right? It's got to be better than what I've been doing so far!" Wei Wuxian rambled, to Lan Wangji's hummed responses. Wei Wuxian was used to this by now, and undeterred he chattered all the way to the healers. He made a mental note of their path - it was always good to know where the healers were, in case of accidents.

He once thought the healer's quarters in Lotus Pier was one of the more serene places in the world, but they were positively chaotic in comparison to the Lan. The whole place had an aura of calm and order - it was certainly restful, though Wei Wuxian was fairly certain he'd rapidly lose his mind from boredom if he had to stay for any extended period of time.

"Ah, Lan Wangji - if you could wait for a moment, I have the report your uncle wanted, and if I could send it with you that would be helpful." The healer asked politely after greeting Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji nodded in agreement, settling on a low bench outside of the examination area. Wei Wuxian followed the healer inside, explaining how he'd spent an extended period of time in the library and tweaked his back, it was just the usual thing.

The healer insisted on examining him, evidently unconvinced that Wei Wuxian understood his own body and its quirks. He supposed that was fair enough, after all, he didn't have the history here that he had in Lotus Pier with their healers. He disrobed without thought, stripping down to his pants in a matter-of-fact manner. He found that healers tended to get testy if you got overly precious about modesty.

It was when the healer hissed in shock behind him that he had any inkling that anything might be wrong.

"What? There shouldn't be any curse marks, I haven't been on a night hunt in months!" Wei Wuxian protested, twisting to try and peer down his own back. At that the healer yelped, his hands landing firm on Wei Wuxian's shoulders to keep him from moving.

"Young Master Wei... who has done this to you?" The healer sounded horrified. For a long moment, Wei Wuxian had absolutely no idea what the healer could possibly be talking about. The only things that had been done to him for the last month that he might take umbrage with were the painfully dry lectures and the painfully tasteless food, neither of which should have anyone looking at him like he'd done ten rounds with a particularly nasty yao. With a dawning sort of horror, he started to understand. He hasn't seen the state of his own back in years. His shidi have - they swim often enough in the river that pretty much everyone he trained with in Lotus Pier has seen it all. No one said anything anymore.

No one had really said much of anything, ever. He figured it was all par for the course.

"Um. It's fine, I swear, doesn't even hurt." That was a lie. He didn't want to lie to a healer, but he was pretty sure no one could do anything about the lingering, zipping burn that caught him by surprise every once in a while (or maybe more frequently that that), so it really wasn't worth bringing up.

"Young Master Wei... this is why studying makes you move poorly. Treating the symptoms without treating the cause is both ineffective and cruel." The Lan doctor replied soberly, which... Wei Wuxian couldn't argue.

He wanted to. His jaw was so tense he thought he might crack a tooth, he wanted to so much. But he didn't know what he could say that wouldn't just make everything worse. He had an inkling that saying that the healers in Lotus Pier had been doing exactly that for years would cause an even angrier response than was already happening, and... well. He hadn't expected angry Lans to be kind of scary.

There was another sharp intake of breath behind him, and frankly, he was getting immensely tired of shocking innocent Lans. Didn't anyone ever get whipped in this sect? Surely he couldn't be the only one.

"Landaifu, can I have the room for a moment?" It was Wei Wuxian's turn to freeze, and he had to bite his lip to keep from whimpering as his sudden tensing made his back spasm. That was Lan Qiren's voice. Why was Lan Qiren here? He really shouldn't be here. This was rapidly spiraling out of control, and he was desperately short on ideas on how to make it all stop.

There was a rustle of robes, and the sound of the door sliding shut - the doctor had truly left. Wei Wuxian belatedly reached for his own robes, to shrug them back on.

"Wei Wuxian." It was the softest he'd ever heard Lan Qiren say his name, and there was something in the words that makes him stop, robes half-pulled up.

"How could he allow it?" It was pain, in Lan Qiren's voice, Wei Wuxian realized belatedly. He hurriedly finished pulling up his robes and turned, wide-eyed. "Or how could he be so dense, as to not know what was going on in his own sect?" The man looked gutted. Wei Wuxian thought that was maybe a bit much - sure, he hadn't made an absolutely horrible impression on the Lan during his first month here, but he also hadn't been a shining example of cultivation either. There was no reason for Lan Qiren to look like someone had stabbed him in the chest.

"Madam Yu is allowed to carry out her own punishments, Lanlaoshi." We Wuxian felt that maybe he should be offering a more impassioned defense of the ways of Yunmeng Jiang, but he still hadn't quite found his footing. He'd expected the first question to be 'what did you do?', and the follow up to be 'how many times did you do it?'. That was how the questions usually went. No one just assumed he was innocent.

"Your mother would burn Lotus Pier to the ground for this. And your father would help her, no matter what his history with Jiang Fengmian might have been." Lan Qiren sounded rock-solidly certain of this. He also sounded near tears, which was entirely unacceptable in Wei Wuxian's estimation. "I am so sorry. If I had been more capable... I am sorry."

And then he bowed, far too low for someone like him.

Wei Wuxian squawked like an alarmed chicken and rushed to tug on Lan Qiren's arms. There was unsettling and then there was just unnatural, and this fell in the latter category. This was never supposed to happen, never in a million years. The noise must have alerted the healers, because the door cracked open again, and the doctor who had left earlier peered in.

And sighed.

"That's enough, you're going to make everything worse. Lan Qiren, apologies, but this conversation will have to continue another day. You. Sit down." Her gesture was sharp towards the bed, and Wei Wuxian found himself sitting with enough force to bounce a little.

Lan healers were scary. Angry Lan healers were scarier. Wei Wuxian decided he wasn't going to make any trouble at all.

"I will have your lessons sent here for the time being. Behave for the healers, I will return tomorrow." Lan Qiren ordered, pulling himself together enough to at least sound like the grumpy old man that Wei Wuxian expected. He never thought to find the sound so cheering.

"But Jiang Cheng will be expecting me for dinner!" Wei Wuxian yelped. Honestly, Jiang Cheng would be expecting him a lot sooner - he knew that Wei Wuxian had finished his project, and had been angling for a spar for days now. He could probably get away with being as late as dinnertime without getting overly grumbled at.

"He will be informed of your indisposition. Wei Wuxian, would you allow one of your shidis to continue with an injury that kept them from reaching their full potential?" Lan Qiren asked shrewdly when Wei Wuxian opened his mouth to argue further.

Wei Wuxian subsided, somewhat sulkily. He wouldn't, and he knew it, and evidently Lan Qiren knew it. He couldn't fight it without being the worst sort of hypocrite.

He only hoped Jiang Cheng wouldn't be too upset. This couldn't be seen as bringing down the good name of the Jiang, right? He hadn't even done anything except what he'd been told, and all of those things had been reasonable requests!

"No, Lanlaoshi. I will stay." Wei Wuxian promised, when it became clear that the question had not been rhetorical, and Lan Qiren wanted proof that Wei Wuxian had seen logic. Or that at least he wasn't going to attempt to escape the second everyone's backs were turned.

 

---

 

Hours later, Wei Wuxian was ready to leave. If he could crawl out of his own skin and escape, he would. The healers would surely strenuously object, based on the things they have said, but Wei Wuxian wanted to run. Unfortunately for him (or perhaps fortunately?) he literally couldn't at the moment - the healers had moved on to needles, and he'd been immobilized to keep from undoing the shivering silver forest that was now glittering over his back. If he was extremely generous, he could admit that they didn't exactly hurt. He wasn't feeling extremely generous. He was feeling exposed, and generally sore, and bored, and very very alone. He had tried to settle into meditation since he had nothing else to do, but he'd never been very talented at traditional meditation at the best of times - he could lose himself for hours in movement, but staying still was always and forever a unique form of torture.

He had thought, in the beginning, that Jiang Cheng was going to barge in at any moment. He'd have done so, after all, if Jiang Cheng had gone missing. It wasn't as if his location was a secret - if Jiang Cheng asked, especially as sect heir, he could find out in minutes.

He tried not to think about why Jiang Cheng wasn't here. Maybe he'd managed to get some kind of punishment, and was writing lines for some reason or other. Maybe he'd gone into town with Nie Huaisang, and decided to go without him since he didn't show up when he said he would. Maybe he was with shijie, and they were...doing something.

Without him.

It was fine.

He was contemplating this (he refused to call it moping) when the door opened. One of the healers came in first, announcing himself as he came in so Wei Wuxian wouldn't strain to look, and after him...

A tray clicked down onto a side table, and then Lan Wangji came to kneel within Wei Wuxian's line of sight. Wei Wuxian grinned, immediately cheered.

"Young master Wei, I will be taking out the needles now. You still should restrict your movement as much as possible, but you may sit up for your dinner. Send Second young master Lan to us if you require help with anything." The healer ordered. Wei Wuxian felt that they were all being immensely untrusting - it wasn't as if he'd put up any fight since he agreed to stay! So cruel, all of them.

"Lan Wangji, did your uncle make you bring my dinner to me? You must have done something to annoy him, are you out there breaking rules, Lan Wangji? Without me?" Wei Wuxian teased cheerfully, ignoring the way the healer's hands paused in surprise. If no one else saw fit to tease Lan Wangji, that was their own loss.

"I volunteered." Lan Wangji replied, calmly, as he shifted to unsling a wrapped object. It was soon revealed to be a beautiful qin.

"Later, I can play healing songs."

"Later? Why not now? I've heard such interesting things about musical cultivation, I'd love to see it in person!" Wei Wuxian enthused, tucking his arms underneath him once the pins and needles feeling faded and he could move them again, so he could arch up a little and see Lan Wangji better.

"You need to eat first. You may fall asleep." Lan Wangji retorted, elegantly plucking a simple tune.

"Lan Wangji, I would never!" Wei Wuxian protested, "How could you say such a thing, how could anyone fall asleep if Lan Wangji deigned to play for them?"

Wei Wuxian thought he heard the Lan healer snort a laugh, but he couldn't yet turn to see if he'd actually convinced a Lan to smile. The tragedies of the day were abounding.

"It can be a side-effect of the music." Lan Wangji explained calmly, not rising to Wei Wuxian's theatrical wailing. Wei Wuxian stopped immediately, cocking his head as he considered the implications of that.

"Huh. Are there musical scores where that is the main effect? I could see that being useful."

"I believe they are called lullabies." Lan Wangji didn't even pause his playing when, for the first time, he actually teased Wei Wuxian back. And Wei Wuxian was sure he hadn't imagined it - the healer's hands paused again, startled. Wei Wuxian felt smug. See? Teasing Lan Wangji was totally worth it. He cackled with glee, which had the additional side effect of distracting him as the last of the needles were pulled out.

He was still sore, there'd been so many needles that couldn't be helped, but he also felt a bit like a puppet with its strings cut, all of his muscles just a little too lax. It made moving difficult, in the way that he couldn't quite get his muscles to do exactly what he wanted them to do, and reeled and swayed a little as he tried to push himself up to sitting. Lan Wangji reached out a hand to help steady him, and Wei Wuxian couldn't help but notice how nice and warm that hand felt against his skin.

Oof, maybe it wouldn't be a horrible thing if he slept soon, his thoughts were definitely getting tilted. Maybe Lan Qiren had been right to ask after his sleep. Not that he was ever telling Lan Qiren, obviously.

"I will leave you two to your meal. Lan Wangji, please let me know if anything is needed." The healer ordered sternly, before taking herself and the truly alarming number of needles away.

"Haha, she has a high opinion of me if she thinks I'd even bother standing at this point." Wei Wuxian laughed, absolutely refusing to be alarmed by how quickly his strength seeped away when he tried to move. It was fine. It was an intense acupuncture session. He would admit that even tired, his back felt more flexible than it had in ages. Well. He'd admit it to himself. Lan Wangji ignored his comment, studiously setting out the dishes. We Wuxian pouted - he'd spent all this time alone, and now that he had company, he was being ignored? Rude!

"Lan Wangji. Lan Er-Gonzi." Nothing. Not even a flicker. This was purposeful now. "Lan Zhan!"

His trump card worked gloriously, Lan Zhan immediately looking up, golden eyes blazing, the tips of his ears turning pink - ooooh, did that make him upset? Well then, he should have answered earlier. Besides, they had to be friends now, they'd spent plenty of time together, and now here Lan Zhan was, bringing him food!

"You should call me Wei Ying, that will make it equal, okay?"

"Ridiculous." Lan Zhan muttered, but that wasn't a no. Still, Wei Ying felt that he could be nice and let Lan Zhan plate up dinner in peace. The fluffy white rice was expected, as were the sautéed vegetables.

The tofu spiced a brilliant red he was not expecting in the slightest, and he gasped in delight.

"Lan Zhan, did you go to Caiyi Town to get me spicy food?" He asked, beaming as Lan Zhan carefully transferred tofu into his bowl for him.

"No." Wei Ying blinked at Lan Zhan's reply.

"Oh. Was it Jiang Cheng?" He'd guess shijie, usually, but it was unlikely she would be able to arrange a trip on short notice, whereas Jiang Cheng had a strong enough core to fly down easily.

"No. I did not get it from Caiyi Town, I made it in the kitchens." Lan Zhan sounded slightly sulky at that, but Wei Ying was too busy being shocked to pay it much mind.

"Lan Zhan, you made this for me?" He figured he was at least friendly with Lan Zhan by now, maybe even really friends, but...

He never would have expected this.

"Wei Ying needs to eat well to heal. He does not eat well when the food is not spiced." Lan Zhan pointed out, as if that logic had gotten Wei Ying even a tiny flake of pepper over the last month, no matter how much he complained. Lan Zhan ignored his gaping, simply finishing his task of filling the bowls (Wei Ying's now brilliantly red, Lan Zhan's perfectly plain) and offering Wei Ying a pair of chopsticks.

For once, Wei Ying did not mind the 'silence while eating' rule. He was too busy enjoying every bite to even bother with talking.

Chapter 4

Notes:

I solved the 'hidden missing chapter' mystery! ... Somehow I created a draft version of one of the existing chapters. I have no idea how I did this. Magic, probably. But it should be fixed now? ... Maybe?

Wei Wuxian had been certain that if he was forced to stay with the healers that he would lose his mind from boredom, but it seemed Lan Qiren was determined that this would not happen if he had anything to say about it.

Certainly there were times he was fully absorbed in whatever the healers needed him to do. They were certainly determined to eliminate as much damage as they could. At first it was focused on the scars from Zidian, but then they found out about his older injuries, from his years on the streets... well. They decidedly hadn't been amused, and Wei Wuxian's release date got pushed back when they had to re-fracture and set a handful of old breaks that he'd just had no one to help with as a child. He'd tried to tell the healers that he'd never said anything about them being a problem before, so how could anyone have known?

They hadn't really bought his logic. Evidently his apparent genius did not extend to medicine.

When he wasn't busy enduring the treatments of the healers (or watching said treatments avidly), Lan Qiren filled his time with more interesting coursework. Treatises on talismans, detailed histories of the sect founders, long lectures (and then following discussions) about how the different core cultivation techniques actually worked. Some things he knew already, from his own observations, or from his admittedly scattershot extracurricular reading to stave off boredom, but enough was new (or differently presented) that for the first time since coming to Cloud Recesses, he looked forward to lessons. Since he was effectively a class of one, he didn't have to hold back to avoid confusing other students (or offending them).  He wasn't sure he managed to avoid offending Lan Qiren from time to time - sometimes more interesting topics were put on hold in favor of rule-copying.  The boundaries of what was acceptable were well-defined, however, and he had the luxury of choosing whether he thought the punishment was worth whatever risk he wanted to take with his arguments.

While Wei Wuxian verry much wanted to be given his freedom again, he wasn't minding his medical imprisonment nearly as much as he thought he would be. And he couldn't argue that he wasn't feeling better - he was actually having to re-learn how to sit, since he didn't have to adjust for old injuries anymore.  Turned out it was possible to sit up straight without undue effort, who knew?

Jiang Cheng had come a few times - at first seethingly furious, first sure that someone had hurt him, then certain that Wei Ying was faking it in order to laze about. The healer had actually come in during that argument, very formally informing Jiang Cheng, as sect heir, exactly why the Jiang head disciple was currently under therapy. The Lan had taken responsibility for the disciples sent by other sects for the year, and as such, had a duty to make sure they were healthy.

When Jiang Cheng had left, he hadn't returned for a few days. When he did return, it was with roasted lotus seeds and a new dice game they played extremely quietly behind a stack of books to try and keep from being caught. Jiang Yanli couldn't come, but she sent messages through Jiang Cheng every few days, along with special treats for him to munch on (and share, of course he shared with his shidi).

Nie Huaisang came a few times, but hanging out in a place Lan Qiren was known to frequent clearly made the Nie heir nervous, so he never stayed for long.

Lan Zhan came every day, at first seeming a bit hesitant about his welcome, then confident when Wei Wuxian told him that he looked forward to the daily visits. And it was true! Lan Zhan proved to be equal to the task of keeping up with Wei Ying's sprinting thoughts, and could understand his leaps of logic without extensive explanation. Plus, they could discuss the coursework Lan Qiren was putting them through.

Once Wei Wuxian was being allowed to sit up again on a regular basis, and he was no longer nearly constantly drained from using so much of his qi for healing, Lan Qiren returned outside of the normal hours for Wei Wuxian's classes. Wei Wuxian felt reflexively nervous when the elder Lan initially knelt down, arranging the books and papers he had brought on the room's small work table. The man was so serious, which was terribly confusing - after all, it hadn't been Lan Qiren that got him into trouble, and it certainly hadn't been Lan Qiren who had whipped him.

"You are owed an explanation I should have given you quite a while ago, Wei Wuxian. I apologize for the delay. I have never found it... easy, to talk about the past, and I hoped with some time I could give a more concise explanation. I feel I may have erred, in that assessment." Lan Qiren began. Wei Wuxian realized that it wasn't so much that Lan Qiren preferred a dry lecturing style - the man was just amazingly formal at all times. It was truly astounding. He nodded, to show he was listening.

"I met your mother here in Cloud Recesses, when she came to take part in the same lectures you are attending now. She had come down from her mentor's mountain and decided this was the best place to get to know the cultivation world, amongst a group of her peers.  She was a bright spark amongst the order and formalities of the cultivation world.  That was the same year your sect leader came as a student to the lectures here, and brought your father along as part of his retinue."  Lan Qiren began, and throughout the following story Wei Wuxian didn't move a muscle, his eyes wide.  Hearing of his parents, and their unlikely courtship, was like a window into another world.  He didn't want to miss a single syllable. 

 

---

 

The days were getting cooler, winter approaching far more swiftly up in the mountains that it ever did at Lotus Pier. Soon enough they were issued thicker robes for the season, and Wei Wuxian had laughed when he first got his.

"Lan Zhan, surely this is too much! What will I do in all this fabric, I will drown in it!" He giggled as he held up the clean white robes embroidered in purple with the Jiang lotus symbol.

Lan Zhan had only looked a bit horrified.

"That is only for indoors - you will wear a cloak over it while outside." He explained, the 'of course' that followed more in the questioning quirk of an eyebrow. When Wei Ying had only looked blank, the horror had become more apparent.
"Wei Ying!"

"What, who needs a thick cloak in Lotus Pier? It's better to have an umbrella for the rains!" Wei Ying had yelped. "You'd broil alive in so many layers!"

Lan Zhan had convinced the healers to let him take Wei Wuxian to Caiyi Town that very day to find a tailor. Wei Ying was fairly impressed - up until then, he'd only had very limited excursions out of the the healer's domain, and he'd been thankful for them. This was evidently enough of a concern that they really hadn't protested much, only demanding that Lan Zhan carry Wei Wuxian up and down the mountain on his sword, rather than letting Wei Wuxian walk or fly himself. Wei Wuxian had been far too excited about the chance to be somewhere that wasn't Cloud Recesses for a little while to protest any restrictions.

During the flight down, he used his time to protest the whole 'needing to get a cloak immediately' thing - after all, the leaves were barely turning, and it was only a little chilly - the new robes were perfectly adequate for now.

Lan Zhan was impossibly stubborn when his mind was set, Wei Wuxian learned quickly. Not only did he not even pretend to think about the reasonableness of their outing, once they landed in Caiyi Town he made a beeline for a very fancy tailor shop that Wei Ying would have never even thought about entering on his own behalf. This was going from ridiculous to potentially disastrous. There was no way Madame Yu was going to approve the costs of anything in this shop if it was being bought for Wei Wuxian, and Wei Wuxian certainly didn't have enough of his allowance saved up to manage the cost himself.

"Ah, ha, Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, come on now, be reasonable, no one expects me to be that fancy, and I'll just to something silly like spill ink on it, you know me, come on, there must be a place for me somewhere in this town, don't worry..." Wei Wuxian protested with all his might, but he couldn't keep Lan Zhan from sweeping into the shop with all of his sect heir glory, leaving Wei Wuxian to trundle in his wake and hope that the poor tailor didn't mind them wasting his time too terribly much.

The shop reminded him of some of the silk merchants in Lotus Pier - this was a craftsman who knew he had a ready-made clientele who wanted the finest that could be found, and thus he confidently displayed wares that someone in a town not near a major sect would never dream of even trying to sell.

It was truly gorgeous.

It was truly out of his budget.

Wei Wuxian quickly realized that despite all of his protests, Lan Zhan really wasn't going to stop unless forced, and he didn't truly want to inconvenience the tailor, he didn't deserve that. However, his face wasn't nearly thick enough to bluntly tell Lan Zhan why he needed this farce to... well. Stop. Now.

"Lan Zhan! Hang on, what's that?" He called, and darted out the door. After that, it was a race to find something new to look at or exclaim over before he'd quite finished with the last thing. He had to keep Lan Zhan distracted. He tried, once, to get a cloak from a less expensive tailor, but Lan Zhan had become positively onery at the attempt, declaring each suggested option sub-par at a decidedly unsubtle volume. Wei Ying had to abandon the attempt before he somehow created an incident between the Lan Clan and the merchants in Caiyi Town - if Madam Yu would hate him spending so much of the Jiang's money, she'd really hate him for creating political difficulties. For a relaxing break from the healers' oversight, it was a decidedly stressful day. He never thought he'd say it, but he was actually pleased when the curfew that the healers set drew near. Lan Zhan wouldn't break a rule to keep them out longer - he definitely never thought he'd be happy about that!

He spotted Lan Zhan peering at the sun's position on the horizon, and frowning. It was very nearly a pout - he was probably upset that he hadn't managed to get Wei Wuxian to buy some ridiculously overpriced and over-fancy cloak. He'd have to make it up to Lan Zhan somehow. But that was a project for another day. For now, he greeted Lan Zhan's sulky pronouncement that they had to head back with a smile and a nod, allowing Lan Zhan to ferry him back.

 

---

 

Wei Ying paid for his antics the next day, sore and worn after trying to do too much on so little energy. Jiang Cheng visited during the lunch break, scowling and scolding when he found a much less interactive Wei Wuxian than he'd been the day before. At least with Jiang Cheng, he could explain why the ridiculousness was necessary.

"You should have seen that place, Jiang Cheng! It was a place for sect heirs, not for the rest of us! Jin Zixuan would be happy there! Can you even imagine what Madam Yu would say if I tried to pay for something from there? That's not asking a dumpling seller at Lotus Pier to settle up the bill for a bit of a snack for the three of us with the treasury officers. She would have been here within hours to tell me exactly how stupid I had been." He ranted, but quietly, aware there were plenty of Lans within earshot. This sect might have a rule against gossiping, but he was willing to bet all the money he didn't spend yesterday that the rule didn't stop much of anything.

"... Why were you even there?" Jiang Cheng asked, clearly confused.

"The Lans have all got it into their heads that I don't have warm enough robes for the winter, and that I very desperately need a cloak. The standard one for the Jiang is fine!" Wei Ying huffed, irritated.

"... Do the healers say that too?" Jiang Cheng asked, uncharacteristically still and alert. Wei Ying had suspicions that Jiang Cheng was having discussions of some sort, with someone, about the reasons that Wei Ying was here under the healers' care. It made his skin itch, but it wasn't as if he could actually stop Jiang Cheng. Jiang Cheng had been more quiet and introspective lately, however, and no amount of needling on Wei Ying's part could convince him to say why.

"Ehh, they don't like anything about how I have lived my life, very critical on the whole." He rolled his eyes. That, of course, meant that yes, they thought he needed a warmer cloak. They thought a lot of things that Wei Wuxian was not entirely on board with. They thought he should somehow spend more time in quiet meditation and never drink alcohol again and somehow avoid being whipped ever in the future.

He often wanted to ask them if they'd ever met Madam Yu. They certainly seemed confident in one's ability to say no to her, ever. It was quite remarkable.

"I will talk with Lan Wangji." Jiang Cheng promised. There was something about the way he said it, however, that had Wei Wuxian studying him with a narrowed gaze. That wasn't nearly as reassuring as it should have been, and Wei Wuxian poked him for it, pre-emptively. He didn't know what Jiang Cheng was thinking, but he already knew he didn't like it. This rapidly devolved into a small wrestling match that the healers broke up far too soon, sending Jiang Cheng away sternly and turning such disappointed looks on him that he thought he might die of it. They were so mean to him, truly. He sulked back to bed - he knew if he didn't, someone would get far too tempted to get the needles out again.

Chapter 5

Wei Ying thought the cloak incident was well behind him after that, since it wasn't really brought up again. Lan Zhan was only mildly sulky the next day, and after that seemed fairly resigned to Wei Ying keeping his clothes as before. Wei Ying healed far enough to be allowed back on the training fields, though only for brief periods of very closely monitored drills - he didn't care, he was just so happy to be able to move, and to have Suibian again. After a few weeks of carefully allotted routines, the swordmaster seemed comfortable enough with his skill level that when one of the Lan juniors (the tiniest, most adorable Lan that must exist in the entire world, he didn't even come up to Wei Ying's hip) came looking for help in basic footwork, he let Wei Wuxian have the fun of walking the child through it. It wasn't physically strenuous to help train a single child, especially when said child was prone to tripping over his own feet, but it gave him a sense of accomplishment he'd been missing since he left Lotus Pier and knew his shidis would be trained by someone else.

After that, his routine became set pretty quickly - study or lectures in the morning on an array of much more interesting and in-depth topics than what were taught in the standard lectures, and then his short drill after lunch, followed by walking a handful of painfully adorable juniors through basic technique.  He went back to the healers without complaint every afternoon.  They had been nothing but kind, and after a few pointed reminders that Wei Wuxian wouldn't tolerate having one of his little shidis over-extend themselves by trying to come back too soon, he finally bowed to the logic of it.

All of his life Wei Ying had been told he would be miserable as a Lan.

He was having the time of his life.

Now, he understood that his experience was not what would have typically happened - if he'd stayed in the group lectures, if he hadn't been occupied by extra classes and challenges and the sheer physicality of the healers attempting to undo years of damage from Zidian - it probably would have been horrid. He would have become bored, and would have probably gotten in trouble quickly. He'd never told Lan Qiren, but maybe his teacher knew - if getting into trouble was an inevitability, he no longer found it much of a deterrent. Why not have a little fun, if it's all bound to come to disaster? He probably wouldn't have lasted long, under those circumstances. Madam Yu would have been furious in that way she got when some warning of hers had been proven right. Wei Wuxian's back ached from the blows his other self would have received.

He was so very glad that he ran into Lan Qiren first, out of everyone here. He was, however, a little worried about what Lan Qiren was planning. Ever since that horrid day when the Lan had found out about the scars across his back, he'd been working on something. After grueling lectures and quizzes, Lan Qiren would then ask one or two... other questions. For some, Wei Wuxian could figure out why they were pertinent. When had Madam Yu started using Zidian? (Years ago, he wasn't sure) What did Madam Yu consider crimes worth such punishment? (Hard to say, and varied by the day - sometimes he was just made to kneel, honestly)

He couldn't figure out why Lan Qiren asked the other questions, though.

Who has trained you in talismanic theory? (No one, it's not widely taught in Lotus Pier, but Wei Wuxian had found it interesting and scoured the library for texts) What do you do with the talismans you've created before? (Mostly keep them in a box, this one is not allowed to use them while acting as Head Disciple as they are not part of the official training of Yunmeng Jiang) When did you form your golden core? (This one doesn't know, Jiangshushu said that it was his core that kept him alive on the streets of Yiling for so long)

But Wei Ying didn't mind the questions, because after them, Lan Qiren would tell him stories about his parents. They all carried an underlying tone of gentle, wistful exacerbation - Lan Qiren still didn't understand the draw of the nomadic lifestyle. Wei Ying told him once about his little daydream about working a farm somewhere tucked out of the way, with days full of honest work and nights spent with someone who kept the home with equal care, and Lan Qiren had seemed highly skeptical.

But Lan Qiren had cared about Wei Ying's parents, in his own way. He told Wei Ying about how Cangse Sanren had been brash and bold when she'd arrived at Cloud Recesses for the lectures, too untrained in the ways of politics between clans to make her time easy. He talked about her quick wit and determination to use her cultivation to help. He talked about Wei Changze, a brilliant man who saw to all of his duties so well that no one realized just how hard he worked until he was gone. He showed Wei Ying the letters the two of them had sent, detailing their adventures in the wider world. It took Wei Ying nearly half an afternoon to read the first letter, as he kept stopping to trace his parent's calligraphy - his father's neat and cramped, his mother's messy and expansive. They were there, on the page - even now, their handwriting said so much about the people they were.

"They were proud of the work they were doing. They told me all of the sects should be working so hard - frequently, and at length." Lan Qiren mused, after a somewhat grueling session on night-hunt ethics. "But I have never seen Cangse Sanren so proud as when she first brought you here."

"I was here as a baby?" Wei Ying blurted, knowing he'd earn a pinched look for the interruption, but unable to help himself.

"You were, a few times, actually. Your mother told me she had made the most perfect baby, and I should be thanking her for allowing said baby to make as much noise as he wanted, as it was also perfect."

Wei Ying didn't know if that blind acceptance of everything he did would have faded with time. It probably would have, as more realistic goals were formed, and the newness wore off. He doubted he would have been a pampered peacock like Jin Zixuan.

But he also wondered what it would have been like, growing up with his achievements praised, where he wasn't accused of trying to bring someone else down just because he did his best. He knew he owed so much to the Jiang, and he loved being a Jiang disciple.

But... his heart hurt a little, that he couldn't remember his mother crowing about anything he did, now that he knew she had once upon a time.

"I wish I had known when they died. Your parents will be terribly upset with me for ignoring their wishes." Lan Qiren's quiet musing broke into Wei Ying's thoughts. The words were soft enough that he honestly almost missed them, all tangled up in the what-could-have-beens the stories suggested.

"Their wishes, Lanlaoshi?" Wei Ying echoed, confused. Lan Qiren sighed heavily. He looked troubled, but resolute.

"Your parents once asked me to take you in to the Lan sect, should they perish on the road. I thought they were joking, that it was some sort of prank they'd explain the next time they came to Cloud Recesses. I did not guess that they knew what you might face in your father's sect." Lan Qiren looked grave. Wei Ying shifted uncomfortably - he felt that he should defend the Jiang, and he was still truly proud to be the head disciple of Yunmeng Jiang... but after hearing so many experienced cultivators he has come to trust be truly dismayed by his life there... he didn't know how. Jiang Cheng would be so disappointed, he knew. Shijie would be miserable. He was letting them down, and that hurt worse than any whipping he had taken in his life.

He didn't realize how fast his breathing had gotten, or how much he had tuned out Lanlaoshi, until he felt firm hands on his wrists, and cool fortifying qi sinking into his meridians. Abruptly he realized he felt like he was tilting out of control, like he'd somehow lost his connection to Suibian in the middle of a dive, and couldn't find the horizon. There were voices, but they seemed muted, disconnected to meaning or even proper intonation. He felt exhausted. He felt like he was going to shake straight out of his skin.

He felt the sharp bite of needles.

Then darkness, warm and still, swallowed him whole.

 

---

 

"What did he say to you? You're supposed to be getting better, which doesn't involve suddenly suffering from qi deviation!" Jiang Cheng snarled, pacing Wei Wuxian's small room like a caged tiger. Wei Wuxian was flattered by the rage in his defense, but didn't really have the energy to diffuse it right now. He was letting them down again. There was a depth of emotion that should go with that thought that was missing, he knew - the healers had told him the teas he would be receiving for the next few days would mute his emotions somewhat as he recovered, so he didn't immediately deviate again. It felt so very strange. Wei Wuxian intensely hated it - or at least, as intensely as he could, at the moment. He'd bother to feel grateful later when he could do it properly. He was sure he'd feel just about every emotion in the book, as soon as they were available to him once more.

"It wasn't his fault. He was just telling me about my parents." Wei Wuxian explained, for what felt like the millionth time. "Lanlaoshi has been very kind to do so once lessons are over.  Besides, it wasn't really a qi deviation, it was just... a little dysregulated."  Enough so that the healers had him on watch again, but Wei Wuxian suspected they were just a little paranoid about him.

"Maybe you should be back in class with us again. So he can't go around upsetting you so badly." Jiang Cheng huffed.

"What, so I can upset him when I'm bored again? That won't save any trouble." Wei Ying pointed out dryly.

"Well, if you could just behave yourself instead of goofing off."

Wei Wuxian wondered if Jiang Cheng's comment would have stung more if he hadn't had that medicinal tea this morning. He didn't mean to get in trouble. His brain just lost focus after not having something interesting to work on, and sometimes he found that he'd caused more of a ruckus than he meant to before he remembered himself again. Never mind the times that he got into trouble because it was much easier to blame the outsider to the family than the heir.

That wasn't fair. But he was having difficulty with fair, at the moment. He at least kept it behind his teeth. Maybe he should have this tea more often - it made being polite, at least on the outside, so much easier.

"Are you even listening to me?" Jiang Cheng demanded, suddenly very much in Wei Wuxian's space. He blinked owlishly, jerked out of his meandering thoughts.

"Yes. Yes I am. I just... I don't mean to cause trouble." Wei Wuxian offered, unsure what was really needed from him.

"Of course you don't." Jiang Cheng huffed, and Wei Wuxian studied his shidi curiously as Jiang Cheng took to pacing again. While he was sure that it was distressing to hear about the near-miss with the qi deviation, Jiang Cheng had on the whole been much calmer lately. Wei Wuxian had been sure that suddenly being one of the smarter cultivators in the classroom had helped Jiang Cheng's mood. So why the sudden vitriol? Usually that only happened back home when Madam Yu had managed to corner Jiang Cheng about some failing or other.

Oh.

"Did Madam Yu write?" Wei Wuxian hazarded, cautiously. The guess was a good one - Jiang Cheng's tense posture immediately deflated, his shoulders slumping. Ah. Well, that certainly explained a lot. "What is she upset about?"

"What isn't she upset about?" Jiang Cheng sighed, finally sitting down on the bed beside Wei Wuxian with a thump. "She found out you're here with the healers through the Jin. She's upset that you're receiving special treatment, and that we didn't tell her. Well, I didn't tell her. I don't know if ajie said anything. What's to tell? It wouldn't be the first time you got yourself hurt."

Wei Wuxian had a suspicion as to why Madam Yu might be angry about this. He thought that Jiang Cheng might as well, but neither of them wanted to say it aloud. They both suspected, he was pretty sure, that Madam Yu knew the healers wouldn't be pleased about the state of his back. But she hadn't come storming up the mountain to take Wei Wuxian away - maybe she thought no one would care all that much, since he really wasn't one of the gentry?

Wei Wuxian wasn't sure, and he was too wrung out to put much effort into theorizing.

"Then she'll happy to know I'll be out soon. Soonish. I guess." Wei Wuxian shrugged, most of his motion from Jiang Cheng's jostling. He probably would have been out already if he hadn't come apart like that. Jiang Cheng hummed a somewhat uncertain agreement, but didn't actively fight him on it. Awww. He was being so nice.

"So, I hope you've been showing the Peacock which sect is superior. Have you kicked his ass in a spar yet? You should, it'll be good for shijie to remember who the superior swordsmen are." Wei Wuxian asked, eager to shift the topic away from Madam Yu and what didn't make her happy.

The topic shift failed. Jiang Cheng tensed abruptly, in a way that Wei Wuxian found distressingly familiar. He was confused though - usually this sort of response came when Madam Yu felt the need to compare the two of them again (somehow always to Jiang Cheng's detriment, even when it patently wasn't true). But that couldn't be - Wei Wuxian had been part of a proper spar since coming to Cloud Recesses - it was only drills and adorable baby Lans for him. 

"So you heard about that?" Jiang Cheng bit out, the words just barely more civil than a snarl. "Couldn't you just leave it be?"

Wei Wuxian was so terribly confused. That emotion seemed to work just fine, at least. Cautiously he elbowed Jiang Cheng, to try and nudge him back towards good humor. That didn't work either - Jiang Cheng abruptly stood, his face stormy.

"Just forget it, its your fault anyway, making me so distracted. You should think on that instead." His shidi snapped before stomping off, only barely managing to give a curt bow in passing to the healer who came to the door to see what the raised voice was about.

Wei Wuxian was fairly sure that if he wasn't medicated right now, he'd be hurt. He was still immensely confused, but the healer who stayed to check on Wei Wuxian's condition didn't have any more information for him.

Wei Wuxian sighed. It would be hours before Lan Zhan would be free to keep him company, unfortunately.  Lan Zhan had extra musical cultivation lessons and practice today, and Wei Wuxian had already told him he had no interest in being the reason Lan Zhan fell behind in his studies.  He resigned himself to keeping himself entertained for the time being.

And trying not to worry about Jiang Cheng.

 

---

 

A month later, and Wei Wuxian was finally getting to move again.

He lost, officially, the fight about the cloak - one morning he had woken up and there was a fine cloak draped over the stand where his thinner one had been the night before, gorgeous in a dark grey with black and red embroidery. When he'd managed to lever himself up to standing, he had spent far too long just feeling the warmth and thickness of the quilted fabric.

Lan Zhan had refused to apologize, and refused anything he thought was 'excessive gratitude', which was anything over barely anything at all.

Wei Wuxian lost that fight as well. Turned out, Lan Zhan was a much better debater than Wei Wuxian once thought.

Wei Wuxian attended lectures with his peers, though he was always given an expanded project beyond what the others aside from Lan Zhan were learning for the day. He'd had to promise Lanlaoshi repeatedly that he would still listen to the actual lecture and be ready to answer any questions - if there was any evidence he'd been overstating his knowledge base, he'd lose his study privileges.

So far the system had worked, and Jiang Cheng went from scolding him about fidgeting in class to scolding him about being inhumanly still and withdrawn. Wei Wuxian let him worry at it - better he got his grumbling out this way, than managing to insult someone he ought not.

He was allowed to start running through more advanced sword forms again as well. That had been a revelation. It turned out, there weren't any parts of the Jiang forms that were simply so effective that you were supposed to muscle through the pain. They were just effective, without pain. They were never supposed to hurt. He supposed that was why he got such odd looks from his shidis when he told them to be brave about certain movements.

The first time he ran through his full routine, able to leap and spin and bend without even a twinge, he had to sit down for a long time afterwards. It was a beautiful early autumn day, the maple trees just starting to show color at the edges of the leaves, but Wei Wuxian had felt cold all the way down to his soul. He doesn't know what he said to convince Jiang Cheng to leave him behind - something laughing and ridiculous, he was sure, that almost always worked. He had to be alone. He knew Jiang Cheng wouldn't take it well if he felt Wei Wuxian was even hinting about thinking that the Jiang weren't the best sect in the world...

But they'd allowed Madam Yu to injure him so badly that he was a much less effective fighter.

He hadn't realized it was that bad. Even with the healers muttering discontent, he thought they'd been exaggerating things. He thought that even at her angriest, Madam Yu wouldn't do something that would actually harm Yunmeng Jiang. Jiangshushu wouldn't allow Madam Yu to cause irreparable harm. He had believed that.

It wasn't true.

It wasn't.

And now he wasn't sure what to do. If they could have allowed that much damage when he was young, and his supposed crimes relatively minor, what would they allow as he grew older, and Jiang Cheng should be taking more responsibilities as heir? There was no way Madam Yu would suddenly realize Wei Wuxian had absolutely no desire to become a sect leader. There was no way she would suddenly believe he wasn't taking any and all opportunities to show up her son.

He was loyal to his sect.

But he wasn't sure he was ready to die, or become severely disabled, without a worthy cause. Jealousy, bitterness, short tempers? Those were not worthy causes. Feeling ill, he traced the whorls in the pattern of Suibian's sheath and tried very hard not to panic. Panic led to needles and medicinal teas and being stuck inside on gorgeous sunny days.

He knew what to do.

He'd ask Lan Qiren what to do.

He knew Lanlaoshi wasn't entirely partial - there'd been a quivering sort of rage about him sometimes in the last few weeks that he suspected was aimed mostly at the Jiang. But Lanlaoshi had never lied to him. He flat-out refused to answer more than a few times, sure, but never lied.

Lying was forbidden in Cloud Recesses, after all.

 

---

 

Wei Wuxian managed to hold himself together as he crossed through Cloud Recesses - he had his pride, after all, and more importantly, he didn't want to give Jiang Cheng a reason to think that an intervention was needed. It was well within a sect heir's rights and duties to intervene on another sect member's behalf to an outsider, and he was sure that Jiang Cheng would interfere in the sort of conversation he meant to have.  However, Jiang Cheng would probably go out of his way to avoid a scholarly debate between Lan Qiren and Wei Wuxian.

Wei Wuxian wasn't sure why - those were the most fun, after all.

So he practically bounced across Cloud Recesses, just barely managing to stay on the correct side of the Lan rules, all the while tearing himself up about how movement was so much easier without damaged back muscles screaming all the while. He'd gotten used to it. He doesn't know when, there wasn't a distinct moment he could remember, but he had to have, to not even realize it was a problem. That there was some other way to be.

Very politely he knocked on the door to Lan Qiren's office. Very politely he bowed after he was allowed to enter. Very politely he knelt, graceful and smooth and easy, so very easy.

"Wei Wuxian - why are you crying?" Lan Qiren's question startled Wei Wuxian, but when he dashed his hand across his face he found it was true - his hand was wet, and now he could feel it on his face.

"I..." He managed, but he didn't know what to say. What could he say? He desperately loved Lotus Pier. He loved his little shidis and shimeis. He loved his senior shiges and shijies. He loved the teeming markets all along the piers. He loved picking lotus on a sunny summer afternoon.

He loved his home.

He was pretty sure it was going to kill him one day.

He wasn't ready to die because of a potentially one-sided grudge. In not one of Lanlaoshi's stories had his mother done anything to indicate she hated Madam Yu. Maybe she did, but if so she didn't make nearly as much a fuss about it.

"Mmm." Lan Qiren's hum cut across his thoughts, and he abruptly realized he never finished his answer. "Treat it like an assignment. Start from the top, and talk me though it."

The idea of that settled Wei Wuxian, unexpectedly. He'd talked through enough thorny ethical questions in classwork for Lan Qiren to immediately know the pattern his discussion should take. He had the immediate notion that he was being managed.

He was offended, but mostly in the way that he was usually the one managing the responses of others, being the more clever one in the room, and here he was being out-maneuvered. It was certainly an experience, in a day full of experiences. He was sure he would appreciate it more later. For now, he simply didn't have the energy to fret about another person in this world. Maybe tomorrow.

So instead of letting his ruffled feathers develop into something more, he started to try and condense his out of control feelings about his life into the bounds of an academic argument.

"Sects were defended and served by their disciples. In turn, the disciples were defended and cared for by their sects."  Did he sound a bit detached?  Maybe.  Lanlaoshi didn't look worried.  Thoughtful, but not worried.  Good.

"Head disciples should be able to train their sect mates and aid in the running of the sect, so their sect leaders weren't bogged down in minutiae. With those extra duties should come extra trust and privileges. If a head disciple could not be trusted, or could not carry out their duties, they should not be in that role."  That earned a nod, but Lanlaoshi was good enough to not interrupt him.  He wasn't sure he could bear interruption.

"Sects are served by having the strongest and most capable disciples available, who suit the culture of the sect. After all, a disciple that fit in well with the Nie might not do so well in the much less straight-forward Jin."  That earned a faint snort, which Wei Wuxain was fairly certain was due to amusement.  A point for him then.  

"If all of those things are true... why was I, a head disciple, punished to the point of being practically crippled?  And if I required so much punishment, why was I  not so much of a troublemaker as to lose my position in the sect?  Either I am capable, and the punishment was unjust, or I am practically a criminal, and should have been demoted, if not sent away entirely. I..."  He had to suck in a breath, and forcibly calm his heart that wanted to rabbit out of his chest.  "Jiangshushu never formally adopted me.  I have no official position within the family.  And even if I was, the Jiang weren't like the Jin, who promote family above talent."  While it was a long-standing tradition, they sometimes paid the consequences of those choices with some truly abhorrent people in positions of power.  

At this point he knew he was crying, and absolutely refused to concede that was happening. The fact that the Jin cousin who kept sticking his ugly face into everyone's gossip got more respect from Madam Jin than he ever got from Madam Yu was infuriating. The fact that anyone could see what he did for the Jiang, could see his work and his loyalty and his love for Lotus Pier and dismiss all of it with a word or two about his parents...

"You are correct. This is not a situation you should have been in." Lan Qiren acknowledged, quietly. Just hearing him say that out loud was terrifying. It was freeing. He had half-convinced himself on the way from the training grounds that he would hear that he was over-exaggerating the facts, that while the damage was too much, the fury behind it was allowable.

"I know you are loyal to your sect, and that is commendable. But you are allowed to seek what sect is the best fit for you as well. You are not their servant or slave."

"But Jiangshushu gave me everything!" Wei Wuxian interrupted, earning a sharp look for his rudeness. "How could I pay it back with desertion?"

"Doesn't Yunmeng Jiang take in other children to train as disciples as they grow?" Lan Qiren asked, with what Wei Wuxian suspected was a forced placidness.

"...Yes." Wei Wuxian already knew where this was going, and he didn't like it, because it was correct.  He needed to find a way to get the Lan to stop using his shidi again him, it was entirely too effective.

"And are those children expected to be Jiang cultivators forever, even if it turns out they cannot manage the style correctly, or if they intend on marrying someone from outside the sect?"

"No." Wei Wuxian tried not to be sulky with his answer, he really did, but the answer was really obvious when put like that.

"Sit up straight." Lan Qiren admonished absentmindedly, and it's such an absolutely normal, everyday moment in the midst of his tilting worldview that Wei Wuxian could't help but snicker as he sat up straight - another thing he'd had trouble with for years. Another thing he thought was the same for everyone, and that such rigid postures were maintained to show off some kind of inner moral fortitude or something. He earned a raised eyebrow for his laugh, and Wei Wuxian has been amongst the Lan long enough to see the worry beneath the forbidding facade.

"Of course, Lanlaoshi, sitting improperly is against the rules." Wei Wuxian agreed, trying to tuck his levity away again. "You've made me copy it a few times, I think."

"Then you should have no problems remembering it."

"Yes, Lanlaoshi." He was tempted to slump right there, just to needle Lan Qiren more, but he did recognize there was a time and place for pranks, and this certainly wasn't it.

"Have you discussed your thoughts with others in your sect? The Jiang children, perhaps?" Lan Qiren asked, even as Wei Wuxian winced.

"No, Lanlaoshi - I was practicing sword forms, and it all sort of... came to a point. As it were. I needed to make sure I wasn't overthinking things. And... ask what I should do next. What can I do next? Does this even change anything? Jiangshushu saved me from the streets, I owe them everything! And I know, I know, you just said, other children are taken in by the sect, to potentially be trained, but... They were my family. Are my family. Or... as close as I could hope for a family, I suppose."

"I did notice you call the Jiang children shijie and shidi, not jie and di." Lan Qiren noted, and there was a question there, tucked away under the agreement.

"I did call them ajie and didi, for a little while. Madam Yu didn't like it though." She had been immediately irate and nearly sent Wei Wuxian away that night.  Wei Wuxian had only been able to stay due to Jiangshushu's interference. Wei Wuxian had never even thought of attempting such a thing ever again.

That was a lie. He thought about it, sometimes, when the world seemed very big. He would never attempt it though.

Lan Qiren muttered something under his breath, but Wei Wuxian was too caught up in his own thoughts to catch what it was, exactly.

"As for what you can do next... there are many options available to you." Lan Qiren continued, giving no hint as to what he might have been saying before. "You may, of course, join a different sect - while you may have problems joining one of the Jiang subsidiaries if your sect leader chooses to be difficult," Or his wife does, Wei Wuxian can hear loud and clear, "There are many sects either powerful enough in their own right to consider the trade-off in their favor, or completely unaffiliated with the Jiang and thus uncaring about the potential downsides. As for the Lan," Wei Wuxian braced to be told that of course he is a poor fit. He expected nothing less, though sometimes his daydreams he thought that maybe...

"We do offer scholar positions - you would need to teach, and show decorum when teaching. We are not so lenient to teachers as we are to students."

Wei Wuxian boggled - wait. That wasn't a refusal. That was conditions on a job. A real position.

"And of course, you could follow in your parents' footsteps and become a rogue cultivator, but I would caution you to refrain from this path until you are a bit older and more practiced - it is a difficult life, even if your parents found it rewarding." Lan Qiren continued, and then paused before adding, "Your posture is appalling."

Wei Wuxian rapidly sat up straight again, still reeling from the shock. If he hadn't expected an offer of a Lan sect scholar position, he really didn't expect any discussion of being a rogue cultivator - with the heavy emphasis on the sects during lectures, he thought it was something not really mentioned amongst the gentry.

"I... I... feel I shouldn't decide too hastily." Wei Wuxian floundered, nervous about this new horizon where there had once been a closed door, and still not entirely certain he should step through in the first place. "But, for clarification... the scholar position, here. Would I still be allowed to go on night hunts?" A 'no' would immediately take the position off his list of options, if only because he felt he should do some good in this world, and he enjoyed being able to talk to people outside of the sects.

"I feel at your age and level of cultivation, you would be expected to do so. Of course, if anything you developed during your time here pertained to night hunts, you would be expected to take the lead on field trials." Lan Qiren answered without hesitation. Wei Wuxian couldn't deny that having clear, defined job roles was... decidedly appealing. He might have earned a reputation, valid or not, that he only did as he wanted... but he only spent so much time in Lotus Pier entertaining himself because he ran out of work to do otherwise. Not that anyone ever believed him.

He got the feeling he might be believed, here.

"I feel I have much to think about. If I may, I would like to take some time and come back... um..."

"Take the week. Nothing need be set in stone until later in the year, as we get closer to the end of the lectures, but setting things in place early will help your transition to whatever you decide." Lan Qiren directed, and Wei Wuxian had to work hard not to sag in relief. "I should let you know that regardless of what you decide, I intend on bringing the matter of your treatment at the hands of the Jiang up to the general assembly during the next cultivation conference."

"What? No! I... I mean, Lanlaoshi, this humble Wei must protest..." Wei Wuxian scrambled, but quails under a sternly raised eyebrow from Lan Qiren.

"And what of the next talented child that Madam Yu decides is a threat to her and her son's position in Lotus Pier? What if they are not as resilient as you have proved to be?"

"Jiang Cheng wouldn't allow that!" Wei Wuxian's heated defense was immediate and instinctual. "He trains the juniors well, he would be proud of any successes!"

"Mmm." Lan Qiren hummed, a non-committal answer, while Wei Wuxian stewed. But as the following silence stretches on, Wei Wuxian's temper cooled, and he could hear the question that Lan Qiren did not ask.

"It's different, with me. Because what people say about my parents. Or. At least." He stumbled at the end, unwilling to put into words what he's heard most of his life.

"If she'd stop reacting so strongly to the rumors, they would die out. No one who knew Cangse Sanren would even dream she would be unfaithful to her husband, and she never gave Jiang Fengmian the time of day. It frustrated him to no end, but that doesn't make it less true. It's an even poorer look for him that he is allowing the rumors to persist so he can pretend there is a world where they might actually be true." The retort was acidic and scathing. Wei Wuxian blinked owlishly at Lan Qiren - it was still such a shock to hear an impassioned defense of his parents.

The more times he heard it, the more he wanted to hear it. He didn't tell Lan Qiren that. He didn't really have any other arguments against Lan Qiren's plan either, which left him fairly adrift.

"You may go. Remember, you have options, and you should consider what is the best fit for you before choosing. You may, of course, continue on as you are... but in my opinion, that is the poorest fit for someone of your talents and skill. Good afternoon." Lan Qiren nodded when Wei Wuxian politely bowed, and then he was out in the open air again, his world thoroughly shaken.

Chapter 6

Wei Wuxian should have guessed that shijie would have the truth out of him before the night was out. She was talented like that. He and Jiang Cheng were visiting her on the women's side of the compound, enjoying an early shijie-cooked dinner, and were being properly appreciative of her efforts to keep them safe from the lack of spices in Lan cooking. It was a pleasant evening. Jiang Yanli was making friends with the female cultivators who had come, Jiang Cheng had won his bouts during training this afternoon, and Wei Wuxian was enjoying the peace.

Or he was, until shijie fixed him with one of her most impressive older-sister stares and asked what exactly was going on with all of the trips to the healers. Wei Wuxian shot a sidelong look at Jiang Cheng - did he not tell shijie he'd stayed with the healers for a time, and what was being done? Jiang Cheng studiously stared at his soup, apparently entirely absorbed in its deliciousness. Which, fair, but also, lies.

Just for that, he decided to tell shijie the truth. She was going to find it out eventually, especially if Lan Qiren made good on his threat. At least then, he wouldn't also be in trouble with shijie.

"Lanlaoshi sent me to the healers after I finished a project for him because he saw I was sore from sitting for so long. They... were upset about my back. But they've made it loads better now. I shouldn't be spending so much time at the healers from here." He promised, hoping a report of his improved health would cheer her up.

It didn't, much. She looked conflicted. He knew she loved him, and who wouldn't be glad a loved one felt better? However, how he got injured and outsiders taking notice of such things wasn't necessarily good news for the Jiang.

"Good, then you can be back in class with us, where you belong." Jiang Cheng grumbled... then froze like a rabbit spotted by a hawk. Shijie shifted to pin him with a stare.

"AXian wasn't in lectures? I thought you said he just had visits with the healers." She noted, sounding in no way uncertain about what had been said.

"Aiya, don't worry about it, Lan Zhan brought me my homework. And Lanlaoshi is giving me harder work now, and it's more interesting! It's fantastic!" Wei Wuxian enthused, hoping to distract shijie away from the possible lies. It worked beautifully.

"Lan Zhan, is it? Have you made a new friend, aXian?" Shijie asked, delighted.

"He's been annoying, that's what he's been doing. Every chance he gets he's harassing the Second Jade of Lan. I don't know why they bothered to heal you, your back is just going to get messed up again when he throws you off the mountain for trying to drive him mad." Jiang Cheng grumbled sulkily over his soup.

"Lan Zhan said he's my friend." Wei Ying retorted hotly. "He thinks I'm great." That last bit might be a stretch, but he has gotten Lan Zhan to admit they are friends, at least. Jiang Cheng scoffed, and shijie rounded on him, scolding.

Wei Wuxian took this time to eat his soup, uninterrupted. It really was good soup. That would be one downside of leaving Lotus Pier - the soup quality would markedly decrease. Of course, that was bound to happen one day anyway, if shijie went forward with marrying Jin Zixuan. Which would be a mistake, but one she was evidently determined to make.

"And what did Lan Qiren have to say about your injuries?" Shijie asked, just when Wei Wuxian thought that perhaps he was safe from further questioning. Carefully he savored the last of his soup before putting his bowl down and sitting up properly. It didn't hurt to sit up properly.

"What right does he to have any opinion at all? This is a Jiang matter!" Jiang Cheng grumbled, scowling at Wei Wuxian like somehow he created this whole problem on his own, just to shame the Jiang.

"He... evidently he knew my parents. He's been telling me stories about them, after lessons. He feels they would have been angry. And..." Words abandon him for a moment.

"Why would they have been angry? You're a cultivator, aren't you? A head disciple of a great sect. Or isn't that good enough? What new heights does he imagine your parents wanted for you? To be immortal before you are even twenty years old? That shouldn't be too difficult, right?" Jiang Cheng burst out, and not even shijie's most pointed 'disappointed older sister' look could contain him. "You can't believe that you could have possibly done any better for yourself, right? Adie celebrates every accomplishment, and all of the disciples sing your praises. You've even dragged other sects into this, as if you weren't being shameless enough in your own sect."

Wei Wuxian smiled. When Madam Yu said these kinds of things, the correct response was to keep your head down, agree at the appropriate times, show as much abject humility as possible, and escape as soon as was polite. When Jiang Cheng said these kinds of things, he was feeling like he was being forgotten, and needed reassurance, not agreement.

"Ahhh, what else could I possibly ask for? And when the sect is yours, this one would..."

"Would what, Wei Wuxian?" Jiang Cheng shoved off the arm Wei Wuxian had tried to drape over his shoulders, standing abruptly. "Would take over? Would do as you wished, as you have every other time? What exactly do you think will happen?" Jiang Cheng didn't actually stay to find out the answer to his question, storming away in a fit of fury.

"ACheng has been having some trouble in class - Lanlaoshi has been particularly hard on the sect heirs this year, though no one knows why exactly. He misses you, aXian." Shijie soothed. "As do I - you haven't come to visit me in between all of your accidents."

"... Accidents?" Wei Wuxian repeated, a little stupidly, as he tried to find his mental feet again.

"Yes, requiring you to go to the healers so often.  I know, you said, the first time was your back, but all of the other times? Honestly, you should be more careful, Cloud Recesses isn't like Lotus Pier - there isn't a lake to catch you here!" She laughed, as she moved to serve him more soup.

"Shijie... I've been at the healers just for the one thing. It took them this long to fix the damage to my back. Well. Most of it, anyway. It doesn't hurt anymore." Wei Wuxian explained, lowly. So Jiang Cheng had lied. "Jiang Cheng probably didn't want to worry you. I'm better now. Though.... the healers and Lan Qiren are... they're very unhappy. They plan on bringing it up at the next cultivation conference."

Jiang Yanli sat quietly, her face a practical storm of expressions - joy, that was obvious, and worry, but also a sort of grim determination he almost never saw from his shijie.

"Wei Wuxian. I want you to know that you are loved, and you will always be loved, no matter what, okay?" She asked, with a sort of fierceness that usually only came out if someone was being mean to the littlest shidis and shimeis.

"Shijie, what...?"

"No matter what. And I would say that the three of us together could take on anything in the world, but it won't be the three of us together for long, once I am married. And... the Lans here, they seem to want to protect you, and let you thrive. I... I want that for you, aXian. I want you to be happy too, even if it is not how we thought it would be."

Wei Wuxian stared at her with wide eyes, feeling like he should be finding the words to answer her, but not having any to spare. Heart full, head empty, belly warm with soup, he could only blink against the coming tears helplessly. In a move that Wei Wuxian had known since he was a small boy, still underweight from years on the streets, Shijie shifted over until she could pull his head against her shoulder and pet his hair soothingly.

"Shijie will always love you, and will always be here. But I want my aXian to be the very best version of aXian he can possibly be."

 

---

 

Wei Wuxian's week was decidedly surreal after that. It felt odd, having Jiang Yanli's explicit permission to seek a life outside the Jiang. It felt odder receiving a cold shoulder every time he tried to talk to Jiang Cheng, who was still seething about the very suggestion that Wei Wuxian somehow deserved or could achieve better than what the Jiang already supplied. While he'd certainly gotten into fights with Jiang Cheng before, this was the first time it had lasted days.

It culminated during sword practice, of course. It was the last day before he was supposed to report back to Lan Qiren about what he wanted for his future, and he was no further in untangling the thorny knot of love and duty and longing and fear that was lodged in his chest. He had been paired with Jiang Cheng to go over the more advanced Jiang sect moves that they'd both begun learning in the last year.

They both knew the move, in theory, an elegant slashing leap that only just avoided overextension, that allowed the swordsman a chance at retreat if necessary - like most of the Jiang style, the rhythm of waves was woven into the fabric of every step. Wei Wuxian was focused on his movements, trying to center on that feeling of being part of a rising storm tide.

He had to put extra focus into his concentration because Jiang Cheng was not having a good time, if the irritated huffing meant anything. The huffing expanded to muttering, then to fully enunciated if barely spoken cursing. It was difficult, that wasn't unusual - they were at a level where each new skill would be a challenge to take on, rather than another easy step. Easy steps were for children - they could no longer claim to be children.

Wei Wuxian did his best to ignore his shidi's complaints. Jiang Cheng always fretted at this point of learning a new skill. Wei Wuxian didn't blame him - it would be terrifying, he's sure, to have Madam Yu as a mother demanding excellence at all time, when part of learning was going through the process of not being excellent at something for a time.

"Do you have to look so happy about failing?" Jiang Cheng finally snarled at full volume when Wei Wuxian got snagged on a difficult turn and had to side step to keep his balance. "You're shaming your sect floundering about like a wounded duck, and you're smiling about it."

"Aiya, Jiang Cheng, it's not like that..."

"Then what is it like?" Jiang Cheng snapped, evidently in no mood to be calmed. "Are you doing it on purpose? Make people feel even more sorry for you? Well you are sorry, that's for sure, drumming up sympathy for poor little Wei Ying, the happy baby who can do no wrong."

Wei Wuxian took a step back, rattled by the vitriol in Jiang Cheng's voice. This wasn't the product of one frustrated lesson. This was something that had been brewing for a while now.

"Jiang Cheng, everyone here is working hard on different skills they aren't yet proficient at, that's the purpose of this time after all." He tried to soothe, but is met only by an irritated scoff.

"You think you have everyone fooled. Well, not me. You were fine before we came here, and within a month you'd somehow conned your way out of lectures with everyone else, out of training, out of leaving a bed... it's ridiculous! You should be shamed, but I know you don't have any shame to spare!"

"... Jiang Cheng..."

"You want to leave the Jiang? Fine!" Jiang Cheng snarled, and stormed off, practically a stormcloud in himself. Wei Wuxian hurried to sheath Suibian, bowed to the arms master, and at a speed that could barely be considered not a run, chased after his shidi.

 

---

 

He found Jiang Cheng by the river, his shidi a forlorn figure huddled on the bare rocks. Ridiculous shidi, not even heading somewhere warm to sulk.

Wei Wuxian dropped down beside him with no fanfare at all, eliciting a startled squawk and then a growl when Jiang Cheng realized who it was.

"Aiya, what was I supposed to do, leave you out here to freeze to the rock? Shijie would cry, you know she would." Wei Wuxian scolded. Both of them knew Wei Wuxian wasn't thinking about Jiang Yanli when he came out here. It made things easier, to pretend.

"Yeah, she would." Jiang Cheng sighed, still bristly and standoffish, but he was no longer raging.

"What's going on?" There was little point pretending that something wasn't needling at Jiang Cheng - he'd seemed less angry about everything that was happening not so long ago, but something had twisted his understanding.

"... Mother has been writing. She said that you weren't hurt as badly as the Lan healers say. That you couldn't have been, and still have done your duties in Lotus Pier." Jiang Cheng reported, quietly. "I... it just seemed... it didn't hurt that much, did it? All that time?"

Ah.

It was much easier, Wei Wuxian supposed, to believe that someone was as chronically lazy as rumored, than to know your mother caused long-standing and severe pain to a child.

"... I didn't think so, before. It wasn't bad all at once, but it became bad, with time. With more punishments." With more whippings, he doesn't say. He doesn't have to. "I didn't realize until it stopped."

The only sounds for a while were the rushing of the tumbling river water, as both boys sat with their thoughts.

"Then you should go. She's only going to do it again. You... you shouldn't be hurt. Just because she is unhappy." Jiang Cheng sounded miserable saying it, but he was painfully sincere. Ahh, his poor shidi - born with a knife mouth and a tofu heart. Wei Wuxian leaned into his shoulder obnoxiously to hopefully keep him grounded.

"That's what Lanlaoshi said." Wei Wuxian agreed, still studying the rushing water.

"What would you do? If you left, I mean?" Jiang Cheng asked, sounding much younger than he really was. Wei Wuxian didn't blame him - he felt much younger than he really was, so it was all even anyway.

"I'm supposed to be taking this week to think about it." Wei Wuxian admitted, wryly. "I've never really thought about leaving. That's what hurt the most when Madam Yu ranted that I was going to be disloyal. I wouldn't leave, Jiang Cheng, you have to know. I wouldn't have, but..."

"But it's only going to get worse." Jiang Cheng finished for him when Wei Wuxian's words failed. "I... you know I didn't mean, when I said..."

"Of course you didn't, Jiang Cheng, I know. Your temper always talks before you even know what to say. You're going to have to work on that, you know. I won't be there to distract whoever you offend." It's a weak attempt at teasing, but he must get something right. Jiang Cheng's answering scoff was half-hearted, but he gave the familiar eye-roll. Wei Wuxian shoved his shoulder against Jiang Cheng's, and let himself be jostled in return. Whatever happened, they'd be okay, in their own way. He truly wished he could stay by Jiang Cheng's side. If only there was...

Wait.

"Wait." Wei Wuxian froze like a cat spotting a spider, chasing the thought that suddenly occurred to him. "What if I could be there? Sometimes, at least? Or at least, people knew you could call on me? Officially?"

"... What, is this some sort of weird talisman you're thinking of? I don't want to be part of your experiments. Last time my hair was pink for a week, it was horrible." Jiang Cheng complained, which was entirely unfair. It had only been six days. Such slander.

"What if we swore brotherhood? Then no matter where I go, we are still brothers, and no one can take that away." Wei Wuxian suggested, his heart in his throat. He had called Jiang Cheng 'didi' once, until he made the mistake of doing so where Madam Yu could hear him. That scolding could have blistered paint.

"You... you want to do that? With me?" Jiang Cheng asked, and there was the nervousness and longing that all of the bluster and temper was trying to hide.

"I have no idea what I want to do with my life, but I know I want that. Come on, we need to find Lanlaoshi. He'll know how we should go about it." Wei Wuxian decided, bouncing up to his feet and tugging on a squawking Jiang Cheng's arm to haul him up.

"What? Now? Wei Wuxian!"

"Of course now! The sooner the better! As soon as Jiangshushu hears about everything, he and Madam Yu will be here before we can blink, and everything will be chaos. What if you leave before we get the chance? Then it will be forever before we can try again! Let's go!"

 

---

 

It turned out that 'immediately' wasn't going to happen as soon as Wei Wuxian dragged his shidi to Lanlaoshi's office - Lan Qiren was already in a meeting.

With Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen.

Nie Huaisang sat just outside, looking disgruntled but not terribly worried.

"Weixiong, Jiangxiong, you're going to have to hide me. Dage is going to want to train after this, and I don't want to go all the way back to my rooms to get my saber, it's too heavy to carry so far. But what are you doing here? I know you've become a glutton for punishment Weixiong, but I thought you were a more discerning gentleman, Jiangxiong. You disappoint me." Niexiong teased, snapping open his fan for the sole purpose of being able to look over the edge of it at them.

"We want to swear brotherhood, and we need to find out how to make it official. Why are you here? And why is your brother here?" Wei Wuxian responded curiously, ignoring the way Jiang Cheng elbowed him for being nosy. Honestly, how was Jiang Cheng going to learn anything when he wasn't around? It was truly worrying.

"Oh, you know, they may have intercepted one of my parcels. Luckily the others made it through, so it's just a minor setback. So you're leaving the Jiang? Come be a Nie, Dage will love it, he'll adopt you on the spot." Niexiong was absolutely shameless in his poaching attempt, ignoring the way Jiang Cheng immediately tried to lunge at him, batting wide innocent eyes at a snickering Wei Wuxian who had his hands full keeping one sect heir from murdering another.

The sound of a pointedly cleared throat stopped the impromptu roughhousing, all three boys slowly turning to see a sternly disapproving Lan Qiren standing in the doorway. He was flanked by a resigned looking Nie Mingjue and a Lan Xichen who was very clearly trying not to start laughing.

"Lanlaoshi, we have a problem." Wei Wuxian started, earning a snort from the Lan elder.

"You three have many problems, but it is encouraging to know you acknowledge it." He sighed, and turned back into the room. "Come in, so we can settle your problem and you can stop causing a ruckus at my door. By the way, I want twenty copies on the rules pertaining to decorum in Cloud Recesses on my desk by tomorrow." Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang groaned, but Wei Wuxian was heartened. Only twenty copies? Lan Qiren wasn't that upset then. Fantastic. Thus, he was chipper as he knelt at the side of the table left for the three boys. Seeing that his two companions were now in no mood to start the conversation, Wei Wuxian leapt into the fray.

"Lanlaoshi, Jiang Wanyin and I wish to swear brotherhood, and we wanted your help in making it official, please." He wasn't sure if Lan Qiren had told Lan Xichen about his promise to start a fight with the Jiang, or if Nie Mingjue had any idea what was going on, but he figured he could deal with those problems as they came up.

"And I should swear brotherhood to them both." Nie Huaisang piped up, ignoring the startled glances he garnered from around the entire table with aplomb.

"Ahhhh... Niexiong..." Wei Wuxian began, trying to think of a polite way to encompass both 'what the hell' and 'find your own distraction' in a short, pithy phrase. Nie Huaisang, who evidently hadn't copied the rule about not interrupting enough times to have it stick, interrupted him.

"No, it's perfect, don't you see? That way anyone who protests that Wei Wuxian and Jiang Wanyin shouldn't be sworn brothers would also be protesting the Nie being included, which would be a bad political move for them, and it gives the Nie a link to the Jiang officially, which can only be good, right?" He explained, innocently. "I mean, I wouldn't know, really, it's all above my head, but it makes sense, right?"

It did. Madam Yu can't demand the brotherhood be somehow nullified without insulting the Nie, which Sect Leader Jiang would be loathe to do. They'd be safe.

Wei Wuxian thought that maybe he's been underestimating Nie Huaisang for a long time. Maybe he ought to stop doing that.

"Why are you and Jiang Wanyin wanting to be sworn brothers anyway? Aren't you his shige, Wei Wuxian?" Nie Mingjue asked in a low rumble, and...

Wow. Um.

Sure he's seen Nie Mingjue before, at cultivation conferences and the like, but never really up close. He's intimidating, frankly.  Just a mountain of a man.

Wei Wuxian wondered if he could be cajoled into sparring. Just once. Wei Wuxian was sure he'll last approximately long enough to maybe block a blow once, but... but he really really wanted to try.

He resolved to ask after all this was finished.

"I... have been offered a scholar's position here, Niezongzhu, and it has been shown to me that perhaps I am a better fit here than in Lotus Pier. But I do not want to lose my brotherhood with Jiang Wanyin." It hurt like a knife under his ribs to say that he wanted to leave Yunmeng Jiang. He abandoned any idea of asking for a spar directly after this meeting - right now he felt like curling around the ache in his chest and hiding from the world forever, or until this wound bled out, whichever came first. Some of the devastation in his heart must show, because Jiang Cheng rocked against his shoulder firmly. Nie Huaisang, getting into the brotherly spirit, did the same on the other side. Buffeted, some of the ache eased.

"The details of this decision will be discussed at the next cultivation conference. But rest assured, Wei Wuxian is not making his choice lightly." Lan Qiren noted gravely, which seemed to settle Nie Mingjue. "Wei Wuxian, later I will discuss your choice with you further. But for now... I agree that a sworn brotherhood would be a sound decision for you three. Lan Xichen and Nie Mingjue may be your witnesses, if you do not minding staying a few more days, Niezongzhu?" Lan Qiren asked, and the discussion turned to the actual procedure for the ceremony. Both of his soon-to-be brothers made sure to keep him from failing to pay attention at any point.

Chapter 7

By the time the whole matter had been hashed out and agreed upon, Wei Wuxian was feeling less emotionally fragile. So before anyone could tell him it was a bad idea, he skipped away from the reach of his soon-to-be-brothers, and hurried to bow before Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen where they had been walking ahead.

"If you please, I have a favor to ask." Wei Wuxian hurried to explain, not wanting to seem like he was wasting their time. "I have heard so many stories of the battle prowess of Niezongzhu - please, may this humble one beg the chance to see for himself? This one will endeavor to make it as much of a challenge as possible." He can hear both Nie Huaisang and Jiang Cheng groaning, but they had to have known he'd at least try, right? Otherwise they were just being irresponsible brothers. It was a learning experience for them.

"What do you think, Xichen?" Nie Mingjue rumbled, as he considered Wei Wuxian with an expression Wei Wuxian couldn't parce.

"The swordmaster says he has dedication and is light on his feet.  He might make it interesting for you." Lan Xichen replied, a hint of that impish humor that Wei Wuxian suspects Lan Xichen has showing through his voice.

"Later this afternoon - I'll have a runner sent for you. We have some other things to discuss before I can play. Will that suit?" Nie Mingjue allowed, and Wei Wuxian held on to his composure with his fingernails - it was really all he could do not to crow victory right there.

"Yes Niezongzhu! Thank you Niezongzhu!"

"He's going to be insufferable after this." He heard Jiang Cheng mutter from behind him, and Nie Huaisang's snickered agreement.

__________________________________________________________________

Wei Wuxian slammed into the dirt, his back stinging again, but this time from being thrown half-way across the training field by a blow from Baxia. This wasn't his first trip to the dirt today. Nie Mingjue had dealt with his first attack in a matter of minutes, but evidently was impressed by his ability to get back up and try again without complaining.  With that and the fact he learned from his mistakes, he was allowed to try again.

And again.

And again.

Wei Wuxian hefted himself up onto his elbows, blinking at Nie Mingjue, who hadn't yet broken a sweat.

He hadn't been expecting that.

Well. He'd expected to be beaten, but he really thought he'd last longer with that gambit. It didn't help his cause that Nie Mingjue was strong enough to cleanly sweep him off his feet . It was so impressive. Maybe Nie Mingjue could stay for a while. Or forever. That'd make an already amazing experience even better.

"Wei Ying." Lan Zhan was crouching over him, his expression tightly concerned. "You should take a break. You are..." Lan Zhan paused, considering. "You need time to reconsider your tactics."

"I almost had him, Lan Zhan, did you see it?"

"No." Lan Zhan's reply was flat.

"Neither did I. Did you hit your head? You're talking like you hit your head, dumbass." Jiang Cheng crouched at his other side.

"I didn't. I... fine. A bit of a break. Help me up?" Two pairs of hands hauled him to his feet, and Jiang Cheng took the opportunity to roughly dust him off as only a truly annoying didi could. Wei Ying shook him off, and bowed to Nie Mingjue.

"This one thanks Niezongzhu for the instruction and the opportunity." He offered politely.

"I'll be here for a few more days - think about your strategy and come back, I want to see what you come up with." Nie Mingjue ordered, grinning, evidently put in a very good mood with a little rough sparring. "Xichen! Come give me a challenge now that I'm warmed up!"

Summarily dismissed, the three juniors cleared the training fields as Lan Xichen took their place, his smile answering Nie Mingjue's.

 

---

 

The ceremony was a solemn thing, but so short despite what it meant. Well, it was short if one didn't count all the time spent preparing. Wei Wuxian had been prepared to do his bows that day. Lan Qiren had other ideas. First, to Wei Wuxian's delight and the others' horror, he assigned a research project. They were to see what oaths were generally sworn at such ceremonies, and formalize between themselves what exactly they were promising. Wei Wuxian had cheerfully led the way to the library, practically dragging the others along the way. He was happy to find Lan Zhan in the library, and pulled him into their project as well. Nie Huaisang made a sly comment to Lan Zhan about Wei Wuxian forming bonds with the Lan as well, but Lan Zhan had only glared daggers in response. Or at least, Wei Wuxian was fairly sure Lan Zhan was glaring daggers, but he seemed to be the only one that noticed. He assured them all that he didn't need that with Lan Zhan, they were best friends, and he'd be here amongst the Lan every day!

Both Nie Huaisang and Jiang Cheng seemed to find something to roll their eyes about in that comment, but it wasn't his fault they weren't as good at making friends as he was.

The only thing that marred the day for Wei Wuxian was that Lan Zhan didn't look happy. He'd offered his congratulations when Wei Wuxian had excitedly told him about the plan, but otherwise had seemed a little withdrawn about the whole thing. He knew Lan Zhan didn't always get along with the two other boys, but surely his friend realized why they were doing this? Wei Wuxian had asked if Lan Zhan had really wanted to be part of it as well, but he'd only gotten a muttered and fervent 'ridiculous' before Lan Zhan had swanned off.

So it wasn't that. Wei Wuxian was glad of that, at least. While Lan Zhan was one of his favorite people, thinking of him as a brother seemed... wrong. Somehow. He wasn't sure why. He'd have to think about it more.

Once they figured out what their oaths were, and Lan Qiren had declared them suitably solemn, they had to dress appropriately for the occasion. Nie Huaisang was delighted to go put on something more fancy than the uniform the Lan had provided for lectures. For Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian, Jiang Yanli swiftly decided to intervene. Evidently Lan Xichen had sent word about the upcoming ceremony, and she also had opinions.  Her boys were going to represent Yunmeng Jiang together with pride, one last time. She bullied them to go take baths, and when they came back, she had their robes ready for them - Jiang Cheng's formal robes, which he'd worn the day they arrived in Cloud Recesses, and instead of the red and blue-black that he'd been expecting, there was a second set in Jiang purple for Wei Wuxian.

"Madam Yu will be furious." Wei Wuxian argued, eying the set of robes like it might be some sort of resentful creature and leap up and attack him\

"And I will be furious if you don't get dressed, are you hoping to find better?" Jiang Cheng grumbled, but settled when Jiang Yanli put a hand on his arm.

"AXian, you are the Jiang head disciple, if only for a little while longer. You should wear the colors of your sect for this. I'm sorry you haven't been able to more often." Her sad smile broke any thought he might have had about arguing. The list of things he'd do to keep that look off of her face was extensive. Wearing the colors of his sect wasn't difficult, in comparison.

He did give Jiang Cheng a shove for his smug expression about it though. It wasn't as if he could deny Jiang Yanli anything either. After the two of them were dressed, they presented themselves to Jiang Yanli for inspection, just as they had for every major event since they were very small.

"Ahh, my handsome boys. Just think, after this, we will be siblings in truth, and there won't be anything anyone can do about it." She smiled, one of her true beaming smiles when they'd managed to make her very proud. "We three shall never be separated, not in any way that matters."

At the appointed time, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian presented themselves to the Lan Hall of Ancestors. They met Nie Huaisang there - his hair was braided even more intricately than usual, and he was dressed in gorgeous Nie greens and greys.

Any joking they might have made now that they were together was forestalled by the sight that greeted them. There was extra altar set up, with space for the three of them, so they could bow in front of the Lan ancestors as well as the gathered sect leaders.

With Lan Qiren, Lan Xichen, and Nie Mingjue watching, the three boys bowed together, swearing bonds of brotherhood. Nie Huaisang was absolutely straight-faced and focused for the first time that Wei Wuxian could remember. All three boys bowed in a line, all perfectly in line and correct, repeating their vows in perfect synchronization - that they would honor their brotherhood, and together support each other and their cultivation. Wei Wuxian was torn between tears and smiling so wide his face might split, and managed to find his balance somewhere in the middle of those two extremes. When they stood, Nie Mingjue greeted them all as didis, much to their combined glee.

After the ceremony, Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen took the three boys down to Caiyi Town to have a dinner to celebrate - Nie Mingjue had insisted it be in town, because who could have Gusu Lan fare and consider it a celebration?

Wei Wuxian was glad Sect Leader Nie had said it, because everyone would have been mad if it was Wei Wuxian pointing that out. The two Yunmeng boys spent the evening trying to get Nie Huaisang to eat something with proper spice to it, as their new duties as collective brothers required. As the evening wore on, all of them became more relaxed after good food and good wine. Wei Wuxian was surprised to see even Lan Xichen drank, with all of the proper decorum and grace one would expect of one of the Twin Jades.

"So I've heard what Jiang Cheng here requires of a bride, and you've both heard my desires..." Nie Huaisang declared, ignoring his brother's groan of protest. "So Wei Ying, it's now your turn. You flirt the most out of all three of us, surely you know what you are looking for."

Wei Wuxian blinked at Nie Huaisang, wide-eyed. He... um.

"Aiya, surely you know flirting is flirting, not anything serious. How should I know?" He protested, trying not to whine about it in front of the sect leader and sect heir. That would be just too much. Honestly, he'd never really thought about it. Either Jaingshushu or Madam Yu would find someone for him to marry, or he probably wouldn't marry at all, but there hadn't seemed any point worrying about it. Flirting was just fun, everyone knew that.

"Surely you must have some ideas?" Nie Huaisang pressed, poking at him with his fan. Jiang Cheng, sensing a chance to get revenge for Wei Wuxian blurting his list to all and sundry, joined in.

"Don't tell me you have no ideas at all, that would be like saying you have no standards."

"Ah... um. Virtuous. Kind. Oh, and a good cultivator, that'd be good." Wei Wuxian blurted, awkward and tongue-tied.

"Good qualities indeed, Young Master Wei." Nie Mingjue thankfully put him out of his misery, his firm praise cutting off further needling from his brothers. Lan Xichen only looked brightly interested - he supposed the Lan sect would likely be potentially interested in having him marry in officially, someday, if the scholarship went well. But that was forever away - he hoped he wouldn't have to be fielding suggestions any time soon.

"Now, as your responsible older brother, seeing as you lot have reached the point of romantic banter, it's time to haul you lot up the mountain to your beds before you drink yourselves to the point of being useless tomorrow. Classes still continue, you know!"

Despite complaints about the cruelness of older brothers, the three boys were taken back to Cloud Recesses, though none of the three were sober enough to fly up themselves.

 

---

 

The next morning was brutal - the sun was too bright and the world was too loud, and Wei Wuxian sat slumped in class forcing his Golden Core to burn off his headache as soon as possible. Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang looked equally miserable. Lan Qiren wasn't cutting them any slack, though at least he was kind enough to not specifically needle any of them.

Wei Wuxian had firm plans to find a quiet nook by the river once class let out for lunch to nap for a little while and hopefully banish the last of his hangover.

"Wei Wuxian!" Without conscious thought Wei Wuxian's spine snapped straight, as his blood became ice in his veins. There was a crackling in the air, and the sharp scent of ozone.

Madam Yu had come to Cloud Recesses.

And she was behind him.

With that whip.

Chapter 8

Notes:

And it's finished! This chapter is a bit long, I know, but all of my attempts at splitting it up were even weirder than leaving it as one chunk. Thanks for coming along on this ride!

Wei Wuxian didn't know what happened next. He hadn't had time to brace for punishment, and his mind was a panicked blank. Suddenly there were arms pulling his - smaller on the left, stronger on the right, bracketing him and hauling him to his feet. There was shouting, somewhere else, Madam Yu's voice violently aggrieved, Lan Qiren's sharply withering. He couldn't focus enough to figure out what was being said. He could only put one foot in front of another as his two companions hauled him out of the classroom and off across Cloud Recesses. Snow crunched underfoot - there'd been flurries throughout the day, and he had to acknowledge (in his own head, not to anyone else, not out loud) that having a warmer cloak was actually deeply helpful.

His cloak.

His new cloak, given to him by Lan Zhan, was back in the classroom.

He tried to turn back, but his companions didn't let him go, and didn't slow down. Some of the fuzz to his thinking burned off with his determination to rescue Lan Zhan's present, and he realized that the sturdy presence at his right was, actually, Lan Zhan.

And he was back at the healers again. He knew his displeasure at this development must have shown on his face when his companion to his left... oh, aSang! He snickered, but still helped shove him into a chair and kept him from getting back up. Both of them stood over him when a cup of medicinal tea was forced into his hands, staring at him until he drank it down to the dregs. He recognized this one, the tea that made the overwhelming moments less... that.

"ACheng is dealing with the Jiang incursion, or he'd be here too. He told me to tell you that, just in case you started getting weird ideas." ASang declared, flopping into a chair himself now that Wei Wuxian wasn't actively making any attempts to escape.

"But why.... I mean, is it just... but... why?" Wei Wuxian stumbled, trying to regather his shattered focus. "Did something happen at Lotus Pier?"

"I'm guessing somehow she heard about us all swearing brotherhood." ASang mused, but he looked terribly pleased about it. When Wei Wuxian sent aSang a questioning look, he relented.

"Dage is going to be so upset someone is threatening his didis. Not even your Madam Yu can easily go up against Dage." ASang declared, smug as a cat who had gotten into the cream.

That was... actually a fairly compelling argument. While certainly he knew that Lan Qiren wasn't going to condone any violence done by outsiders in Cloud Recesses, having Nie Mingjue on his side was definitely encouraging.

"I should..." He started, but Nie Huaisang neatly collared him when he tried to stand up, hanging on like a limpet.  For a man who complained about any sort of physical training like he was being hauled off for torture, he had remarkably fast hands.

"You should stay here until you're actually called for." Nie Huaisang declared firmly, and Lan Zhan nodded in agreement. "I know, you want to try and talk everyone down until you're the only one in trouble, but that's not going to happen this time."

"... You're awfully well informed." Wei Wuxian noted, narrow-eyed.

"Jiang Cheng talks so much when drunk, you know?" Nie Huaisang agreed cheerfully, and Wei Wuxian suddenly wondered just how much wine aSang had actually had last night. Hmmm.

"Now, I think the healers would be happier with us if we actually made like we were actually doing something healing. Lan Wangji, I think aXian here needs some calming music." There was still a smirk lurking around the corners of his lips like he really wanted suggest something else, Wei Wuxian was just as happy that whatever it was, he kept it to himself.

It was hours before anyone came for them, though aSang assured them that there were very few places in Cloud Recesses that two sect heirs could disappear off to that wouldn't be known by those who needed to know. Between his brother, his friend, and the calming tea, Wei Wuxian managed to not fall apart with the stress of the wait. When someone did come, it was Jiang Cheng, escorting Jiang Yanli. The healer gave them all a stern warning about not disrupting anyone else who was attempting to heal here, but let the five of them have the room to themselves. Jiang Cheng got a bone-creaking hug, the two boys bracing against each other with the shared knowledge of the sort of storm brewing outside. Then he fell into shijie's arms, letting her pet his hair until his thoughts slowed. The others were talking. Let them. He was safe for now, and he really didn't want to think about it anymore.

 

---

 

It was Lan Zhan who heard them coming and stopped his playing, having long since moved on from healing songs to the Yunmeng folk songs he'd learned from Wei Wuxian. There were firm footsteps in the hall outside the room. Wei Wuxian managed to untangle himself from shijie's hold, but when he stood, his brothers and Lan Zhan stood with him. There was a polite knock on the door - not Madam Yu on a rampage then. Then the door slid open to reveal Lan Qiren in his most scowly of moods, Lan Xichen looking sober, and Nie Mingjue looking borderline murderous. Well. That was. A combination. Wei Wuian did his best to believe that they weren't all mad at him, but.

Well.

He did his best. No one could ask more than that, right?

Lan Qiren eyed the lot of them and somehow gave the impression of rolling his eyes at them without being so terribly improper as to actually do so.

"Wei Wuxian, do you still intend on taking up the scholar position here with Gusu Lan, pending an official contract and the end of lectures here? Or have you decided on a different plan?" Lan Qiren asked without preface, and Nie Huaisang looked briefly and intensely hopeful.

"Yes, Lanlaoshi, at this time that is my plan. But may..."

"Is there anyone who can corroborate what you told me about the use of your personally designed talismans in Lotus Pier?"

"Mother would never allow their use after the one that turned a Jin cultivator's hair pink for a day. That was... what, almost a decade ago?" Jiang Cheng pitched in, with Jiang Yanli nodding in support.  The interruption earned sour look for breaking into the questioning, but also reluctant nod from Lan Qiren.

"I still say he deserved it. He was mean to shijie." Wei Wuxian added in a mutinous mutter, with Jiang Cheng's agreeing nod.

"Is there anything at Lotus Pier that is yours that you would not want to lose? That you may take away freely?" Lan Qiren's question sobered Wei Wuxian quickly - so it was like that. There were plenty of things in his room at Lotus Pier - his notes from various research projects, sketches, his chest where the talismans he never got to test were put, various trinkets from night hunts through the years... but no.

"I came into Yunmeng Jiang with only the clothes on my back - I am prepared to leave the same way." If it came to that, he would also lose Suibian - that would be a painful blow, but it wouldn't end him. Still. He had hoped, when he started thinking about it, that he would at least get to go back to Lotus Pier with the Jiang to pack up properly, and say goodbye to everyone. To know that he would not see his home again for the foreseeable future... that hit harder than he imagined it would, and he'd already known it would hurt.

"Now, I will allow in your Sect Leader - he will ask you similar questions, and possibly others - answer him honestly, and we will bear witness. The sect leader's wife will not be part of this conversation." Lan Qiren explained, and Wei Wuxian could see Jiang Cheng wince in his peripheral vision. While he felt sorry for aCheng, he wasn't about to ask for her to come in just to try and soothe her temper. Besides, Sect Leader Jiang may be more reasonable when not being hounded by Madam Yu.

 

---

 

The healers had protested the meeting happening in their halls - there were others under their care besides Wei Wuxian, and none of them would be aided by the short tempers of multiple sect leaders. Thus, Wei Wuxian found himself in the middle of a small knot of cultivators heading toward the Yashi, with messengers sent to the Jiang contingent of the change in venue. Along the way Wei Wuxian tried to argue that he was perfectly capable of negotiating a change in sects with his Jiangshushu all on his own - after all, he'd always thought that Jiangshushu was fair, if adverse to conflict. Lan Qiren only snorted. Lan Xichen and Nie Mingjue hadn't spoken up in support of their fellow sect leader. Whatever had been said between him being dragged out of the classroom and now between the sect leaders, it evidently didn't endear them to Sect Leader Jiang.

He couldn't imagine what could have been that dramatic. He was sure Sect Leader Jiang would be disappointed, certainly, but these sorts of things did happen. And he had to have known there was a possibility of it happening the longer he let Madam Yu take out her jealousy on his ward.

Jiang Cheng shot Wei Wuxian an apologetic look as they entered the hall, but he had to split off from the group to go sit beside his father. Wei Wuxian tried to give him a reassuring grin in return - Jiang Cheng was sect heir, after all, his place was with the Jiangs, no matter what his personal preference might be. At Jiangshushu's other side was Madam Yu, her expression one of barely contained fury and scorn. She audibly scoffed when she spotted Wei Wuxian, and he forced his chin up - he wasn't going to give her the pleasure of seeing him quail. He reminded himself that he didn't have to fear her anymore. There were people in this world who would have opinions about him coming to harm, and seemed to feel they had a say in his fate. 

A few of those people, it seemed, had opinions about Madam Yu being at a meeting that she had not been explicitly invited to.  Wei Wuxian managed to escape Madam Yu's immediate focus when Lan Qiren had stepped between them to convey as much.  The resulting haughty diatribe about who really made the decisions in Yunmeng Jiang was nothing new to Wei Wuxian, so he used the time to go find his own seat, while he wasn't feeling like such a target.

Resolutely he passed where the Lans settled, and where the Nies settled (despite Nie Huaisang making one last attempt at gesturing at an empty spot at the Nie table), and instead sat at a table of his very own. He was suddenly ridiculously glad his brothers and Lan Zhan had hauled him off to the healers first - without that calming tea, he was pretty sure he would be tearing himself to shreds by now. He resolved to never tell the healers this. They'd be entirely too smug, it simply could not be bourn.

"AXian, is it true you wish to leave the Jiang, after we have cared for you and trained you for so many years?" Sect Leader Jiang didn't even wait for everyone to be seated before he spoke, sounding more miserable than Wei Wuxian had ever heard from him. Guilt, no matter how unwarranted, chewed at his heart - he was grateful it wasn't eating him whole. He still wasn't going to admit any of this to the healers.

"Jiang Fengmian, you forget yourself - these sorts of things have procedures." Lan Qiren scolded, just as he scolded his students in class. The sound was almost comforting in its familiarity. Wei Wuxian clasped his hands in his lap and kept his mouth shut. If and when they wanted his opinion, he was sure he would be told about it.

He wished there was someone sitting beside him. Holding his own hand was fine. Holding someone else's would be better.

"Forgive me, this has just all come as such a shock." Jiangshushu replied, not looking away from Wei Wuxian. "But yes, do go on."

"No, do not go on!" Madam Yu snapped, her temper fueled by her husband's acquiescence. Wei Wuxian could have told them this was a trigger - nothing made Madam Yu more irate than seeing her husband choose politeness and nonaggression over assertiveness. Considering that Jiangshushu was most comfortable when he could avoid a fight, this lead to quite a lot of arguments over the years all on its own.

Wei Wuxian always wondered how she'd failed to notice this trait of Jiangshushu's before they got married. Maybe she had thought she could learn to deal with it. She'd obviously thought wrong.

"This upstart, this son of a disrespectful servant, dares to place himself amongst the gentry, dares to even think that he deserves to demand more than he has been so generously given over the years, and everyone wants to sit here like this is normal? Like this is accepted? This is an insult! He should be kneeling for punishment, not being treated like he's someone respectable!" Madam Yu ranted, venom in every word.

"You would have me acknowledge this gutter trash as my son's brother? My husband may have no care for my pride, but I would have thought the purportedly righteous Nie and Lan would at least pretend they..."

"Wei Wuxian has been acknowledged by myself and the Nie as my didi's brother. Just as we recognize Jiang Wanyin. Your pride, madam, has nothing to do with it." Nie Mingjue's voice cut across Madam Yu's as heavily as Baxia, with approximately the same effect - silence fell in the hall abruptly. Nie Mingjue's glower spoke volumes, as did Madam's Yu's wide-eyed affront, but neither of them broke the silence. The junior cultivators who had not yet taken seat before Madam Yu began her diatribe and had frozen in sensible self-preservation now sheepishly took their seats, and the room gradually came to order.

Wei Wuxian would never dare accuse Lan Qiren of being petty, but the man did wait to speak, not only until everyone was seated but also until silence had fallen in the hall once more. Wei Wuxian focused on him, refusing to let his resolve weaken.

It would be terribly easy to say he changed his mind. That he'd go back. He reminded himself that doing so wouldn't fix anything. Lan Qiren would still bring the matter up at the next cultivation conference. The Jiang would still face censure. He'd just be within whip range of Madam Yu when it happened. No other greater purpose would be served.

His parents had wanted him to grow up with the Lans, if anything had happened . They had brought him here.

He didn't remember anyone ever saying that his parents brought him to Lotus Pier.

"We are gathered here to bear witness and ensure correct conduct on all sides in this matter. Before we adjourn today, we will ensure there is a contract in place for Wei Wuxian, for the next year at minimum, which is agreeable to all who sign it. Are there any protests, sect leaders?" Lan Qiren asked. Wei Wuxian was not surprised when Jiangshushu immediately replied.

"This is a Jiang matter, and does not require so much fanfare. I protest this unnecessary oversight of what should be a simple talk between Wei Wuxian and myself." He complained, somehow managing to sound incredibly reasonable even though Wei Wuxian knew there would be nothing simple about this discussion.

"Sect Leader Jiang - have you forgotten already that I told you that the treatment of Wei Wuxian in your sect will be discussed at the next cultivation conference? Considering that you allowed his mistreatment within your sect to continue for so long without protest or interference, I am firmly of the belief that this meeting is incredibly necessary." Lan Qiren's reply was acidic.

"I must agree - I do not believe I have the full story, as I have only heard what my brother has told me, but my brother is not prone to spready falsehoods." Nie Mingjue chimed in, his voice the rumble of a distant landslide. "This sort of behavior would not be tolerated amongst the Nie."

Jiangshushu subsided with an unhappy twist to his mouth. Wei Wuxian had to hold his nerve - he'd spent so long trying to please Jiang Fengmian that being the direct reason for his unhappiness ripped at him. Madam Yu looked nearly ready to explode, but her ire seemed divided between her husband and the rest of the room. Had Jiangshushu failed to tell her what Lan Qiren meant to do? Had he not said that Lan Qiren was actually very serious about it?

"Now, just so we are all perfectly clear - Wei Wuxian. Is it your intention to leave Yunmeng Jiang as a disciple, and seek a different path in the cultivation world?" Lan Qiren asked, redirecting the focus of the room onto Wei Wuxian. It felt like a mountain slid on top of him. He wanted to run. It felt dangerous, sitting here.

But instead he grabbed hold of all the bravery he'd used in every night hunt, unfolding himself from his seat and bowing to the group politely. Stubbornly, he didn't let himself wobble even a fraction. Let Jiang Fengmian see just how much more graceful he could be when he wasn't hurting.

"Honored cultivators, that is my intention." He agreed, as polite and compact and emotionless as he could manage it.  As he sat back down, he could hear the mutters of dismay from the Jiang group above the hissed displeasure from Madam Yu. It was heartbreaking. It was somewhat gratifying. It was too late.

Jiang Fengmian stood, his usually genial expression now dour.

"I fear aXian has fallen into some... unusual ways of thinking while here, and is making this decision with a mistaken view as to what his future would hold. Perhaps he thinks he will be able to continue a student's life of leisure, or enjoy a more carefree path with his friends." It sounded reasonable... if completely unfounded in reality. Wei Wuxian suspected some of Madam Yu's rants were behind this twist of logic, though he could also see how an outsider would look at the last few months of his life and think he was lazing about courtesy of the Lans. Who was the one sharing such views? Probably one of the Jin. Such snakes.

"I would not wish to see a cultivator with such promise as aXian fail to live up to his potential due to promises of ease, or become unhappy with his lot when his new path proves to be more difficult than he hoped. He has done well with the Jiang thus far, and so, I believe, he should continue." Jiang Fengmian declared. "It is what his parents would have wanted."

Wei Wuxian saw red.

"Sit down, Wei Wuxian." Lan Qiren snapped, sharp as a whipcrack, and it was only then that Wei Wuxain realized he'd stood, snatching up Suibian. Well. Turned out that tea had limits. He had to force himself to take a deep breath, when really he wanted to snarl. Instead, he bowed, briefly, impolitely briefly, and plonked back down. He wanted to rage, now that he knew more of what his parents were like other than 'people Jiang Fengmian said he'd cared for'.

"Each cultivator is allowed to make choices for themselves, as best suit their goals and temperament, Jiangzongzhu. As Wei Wuxian is not a slave or servant, he also has this right. Let us not confuse the issue." Lan Qiren's reply was flat, in a way Wei Wuxian had come to learn came one step below retorts that could strip paint off wood.

"That said, Wei Wuxian has said in the presence of both Niezongzhu and my nephew, Lan Xichen, that he is interested in the scholar's position here in Gusu Lan. I have spoken with the sect elders - we would like to offer Wei Wuxian a role as a teacher of talismanic arts. He would, of course, be allowed to work on advancements in this field, and would be required to develop and teach classes for disciples here, along with students at regular junior lectures for all of the sects. Along with these duties would also come the standard duties and rules of a disciple in Gusu Lan." Lan Qiren's direct gaze was a lifeline, and Wei Wuxian held to it.

"I don't know what he told you, those disgraceful scraps, mere mockery of proper talisman work, are only pranks and disasters. He will have your sect disgraced and destroyed if he's allowed to deploy them at will. You have been misled, Lan Qiren."

"Oh, have you seen any of his recent work?" Lan Qiren asked with a deceptive calm.

"They have been rightfully banned from use in Yunmeng Jiang, I would not have him burn Lotus Pier to the waterline." Madam Yu scoffed. Jiangshushu looked puzzled by the whole argument - of course, he hadn't known anything about Madam Yu's pronouncement. Jiang Cheng looked like he was hanging on to his composure with his fingernails.

"I would like to accept, Lanlaoshi ." Wei Wuxian agreed, cutting across the argument, and when he saw a miniscule twitch to Lan Qiren's eyebrow he added a hurried, "Once I've seen and reviewed the contract, of course."

Because there were supposed to be contracts to these sorts of positions. Like how there should have been a contract when he was made head disciple.

Wei Wuxian had certainly never seen a contract. The Jiang would not be able to produce such a document with his signature on it, and he caught the moment that Jiang Fengmian and Madam Yu realized that. It felt like victory.

It tasted like loss.

Silence reigned for what felt like an age of the world.

"Well. It sounds like this is a well-settled matter already. I believe that when I leave, I should take what disciples I still have with me, to keep any more from being stolen away by airy promises." Jiang Fengmian huffed, the bitterness in his voice making Wei Wuxian flinch. "Come, Jiang Wanyin, my lady." With that he stood and offered only the barest suggestion of a bow to the Lan and Nie. Then, offering his arm to his wife, swept out of the hall, followed by his disciples.

He didn't look at Wei Wuxian again.

Jiang Cheng, who had risen obediently when his father had stood, wavered on his feet, completely out of his depth. He clearly wanted to be the filial son and follow at his father's heels, but he also did not want to insult both the Lan and the Nie as his father had evidently decided was acceptable. He looked to Wei Wuxian, but Wei Wuxian didn't have any answers for him - he would have expected such behavior from Madam Yu, and it threw him off as well. Nie Mingjue took pity on him - that sworn brotherhood was already coming in useful if it earned Jiang Cheng didi status in Nie Mingjue's eyes. The Nie Sect Leader rose to bow politely to Jiang Cheng, which he could echo, and then bolt after his father. Wei Wuxian longed to follow, if only to avoid what was sure to be another round of awkwardness inside the hall.

Nie Huaisang had other plans. He immediately left his dage's side to thump down beside Wei Wuxian, leaning heavily on him while fanning himself like some sort of fainting maiden.

"That was just entirely too dramatic, only easy topics of conversation and good moods from here on out." He declared. Wei Wuxian was touched - after all, Lan Qiren was still in the room, and he was sure Nie Huaisang wasn't any less frightened of him all of the sudden.

"Yes, let us adjourn for today - Wei Wuxian, we will draw up a proper contract for you in the next few days, if you are content with the duties stated so far." Lan Qiren agreed, startling both boys. Wei Wuxian, weighed down by a nearly boneless Nie Huaisang, bowed where he sat.

"I... um. I'm content. Thank you." Wei Wuxian stumbled, still floundering after that disaster of a meeting and admittedly surprised that that the offer in its entirety was still on the table - he'd thought some of that was merely a lure, either to get him to agree quicker or to goad Jiangshu... Jiangzongzhu into some sort of response.

Well. It'd worked pretty well for the latter goal regardless, hadn't it?

Wei Wuxian wished to hide away from the world forever. Or at least a little bit. Until it stopped being quite so overwhelming.

Nie Huaisang folded his fan with a snap and poked him with it.

"You're supposed to argue for provisions. Guaranteed supplies, quarters, days off to go do whatever, that sort of thing." He informed Wei Wuxian, but not unkindly, more like this was something he clearly knew and had forgotten.

Wei Wuxian didn't know it. He hadn't really been part of contract negotiations, always shooed away by Jiangzongzhu or chased away by Madam Yu. It now felt like a deliberate oversight.

"Ah. Um. I." He had no idea what to ask for, what he could ask for without sounding ridiculous, what was too little to ask for that would just be insulting. This was important. He was messing it up already. He tried to keep a lid on his bubbling panic, but he supposed it was nearly impossible to hide something from somebody who was practically sprawled on top of you.

"That's it, I'll be your negotiator, it is my duty as... hang on, let me think... no, I'm older, definitely, so I'd be your erge. It's my duty as your erge to make sure that you learn this useful skill - we aren't haggling for goods in the market square here." Nie Huasiang declared, resolutely ignoring Nie Mingue's snorted laughter. Lan Qiren definitely looked like he had a headache brewing, but he refrained from actually giving them a scolding.

"I'll get a list from him by tomorrow!" Nie Huaisang sounded confident, which... well, Wei Wuxian was glad one of them was. At the moment he was torn between wanting to retreat to the library where he could catch up on all of the details about contracts that he'd never learned, and wanting to chase after Jiangzongzhu and apologize. He was pretty certain that the second notion would be roundly criticized by everyone except Jiangzongzhu, so the library plan was winning. The library plan sounded joyless.

The Lans and Nie Mingjue started to rise, and the boys scrambled to do so as well. Once they were alone, Nie Huaisang wasted no time dragging him away. He quickly pulled them off of the main paths, showing a familiarity with Cloud Recesses that he'd evidently been sitting on this entire time.

"Dage has been taking me here since we were both kids, they don't even blink when they find me in the more restricted areas anymore." Nie Huaisang explained as he powered on. "And the Jiang hardly ever come here - neither the sect leader or his wife will be off the main paths."

Oh. Well. That. That made sense.

"But where are you taking us? The dormitories are back the other way." Wei Wuxian prodded, as he let himself be led. He was out of decision-making energy at the moment, and was just as happy to be led. He just hoped this wasn't some super-secret path to Caiyi Town - he wasn't really in the mood to be sociable, and he would bet there would be Jiang disciples at the restaurants in town right now.

"Lan Wangji was upset he couldn't come to that meeting. So he told me that if you needed a place to go afterwards, to take you to his house. Well, he said it more concisely than that, but you know what I mean." Nie Huaisang revealed cheerfully, then yelped when Wei Wuxian dug his feet in and hauled them both to a stop.

"You're taking me to the Lan inner compound? After I just caused problems between them and the Jiang? Are you insane? They'll never take me on if I cause them even more problems!" Wei Wuxian tried to tug himself free of Nie Huaisang's grasp, but his brother was as persistent as a burr.

"Because it will cause less problems when Lan Wangji realizes the meeting must be over by now and you haven't shown up? If you think he's not going to rushing to your rescue thinking the Jiang somehow have you, you're very confused." Nie Huaisang snickered... and then shock flashed across his face.

"You are very confused. Oh no. I don't know if this is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me or the worst. AXian, how can you be so brilliant and so very dumb at the same time?" His brother demanded, with the sort of exasperation that usually only crept into Jiang Cheng's voice when Wei Wuxian was being intentionally extremely difficult.

"I... what? I mean, he is my friend? And he is righteous? So I guess he'd come make sure I was safe? ASang?" Wei Wuxian's attempt at reasoning out what aSang was getting at was only met with a snort of derision and renewed tugging at his arm as Nie Huaisang took the lead again through the twisting pathways.

"This explains so much." Nie Huaisang muttered has he hauled Wei Wuxian along. "Xichenge was starting to worry, but we didn't account for this. Don't worry, I'll fix this too. Aiya, being your brother is so much work, you owe me so much, aXian."

Wei Wuxian had no idea what was going on anymore, so he just let himself be towed, hoping that if they did run into anyone, aSang would be able to explain for both of them.

Set back into the forest they found a house - a stream idly trickled through the clearing, its gentle sound setting a sense of serenity over the place. A serenity that aSang promptly broke.

"Lan Wangji, we're here! And he's fine, promise, he did great!" ASang sang out without a single drop of shame, startling the heron in the river into flight. Wei Wuxian was about to round on aSang for being such an inconsiderate guest, when the door slid open and Lan Wangji appeared in the doorway.

Oh. He did look worried.

"And now you can take him, and I'll go get us all snacks, and try to get a feel for when aCheng might be able to sneak away." Wei Wuxian was shoved in the direction of the house and Lan Wangji.

"Wait, Jiang Cheng?" Wei Wuxian turned to ask, nearly stumbling on the loose rocks of the path, but then Lan Wangji was there to steady him.

"Oh yeah, and we're not telling him you even thought it was a question. He's going to try, at least - I'm not sure if it will be possible with both of his parents being upset tonight, but some of the backup plans might work. You can spend your time writing your message for Jiang Yanli - I don't think she can get this far into the inner sect compound without a chaperone, and she'll most likely be with her mother the rest of her time here."

As was the course of such things, as soon as aSang said that, the thing Wei Wuxian wanted most in the whole world was a comforting hug from his... well. She wasn't his shijie anymore, was she? Or at least, soon she wouldn't be. But she was his ajie, through his sworn brotherhood with Jiang Cheng, so there was still the chance for someday. It just... wouldn't be any time soon. He understood that with his head, but his heart bled at the thought that he couldn't go near her for the foreseeable future.

"Ah, Lan Wangji, I leave him to you before I make anything worse. I'll be back soon!" Nie Huaisang promised, slipping away back down the path.

"Wei Ying." Lan Zhan was close enough to feel the warmth of him. Wei Ying abruptly realized he was being ridiculous standing out in the cold when he could be inside where it was much more comfortable. It was just now that he had thought about how his missed Jiang Yanli, every step that wasn't in her direction hurt.

"Ah, Lan Zhan, I'm..." He wanted to say he was alright, but when he turned to look at his friend, there was already an unhappy twist to his lips. "Aiya, I know, I know, no lying in Cloud Recesses. I'm... as alright as I can be. Right now." He edited, and while Lan Zhan's expression didn't smooth out, he did keep from lecturing about the rules. Wei Wuxian decided to take what wins he could get at the moment.

"Come inside, Wei Ying." Lan Zhan urged quietly, and what could he say to such an earnest request? Wei Wuxian nodded, heart heavy. He knew, once he had time to come to terms with everything, he would still believe he made the right choice. It was, logically, the best path for him, and he was truly excited by it. He just had to make his peace with what he lost first, before he could celebrate. He never expected fairness from this world, but this all seemed particularly unkind. That it was a cruelty he saw coming didn't make it hurt any less.

He knew that Lan Zhan would expect him to talk. That was how it usually went when they spent time together - Lan Zhan was a bastion of peace, and Wei Wuxian was free to rattle about all of his crazy ideas without worrying that he was boring Lan Zhan or talking over his head. It was glorious.

But he didn't really have a lot of words, at the moment. Or rather, he had so many he didn't know where to start with them.

He was going to miss his home, and his sect mates, and his siblings.

He knew this was the best choice for him, but now that his feet were on the path, he worried that he'd done something wrong.

He wanted to know why Jiangzongzhu didn't fight harder to keep him. The only argument had been that he was too young to know what he wanted, that he had been led astray by those in power. Was it because Jiangzongzhu knew that the conditions of his position in Lotus Pier were intolerable, and knew not to fight it? Or was it because he thought this was a betrayal, and he didn't want to deal with such a disloyal disciple any more? Was it because he feared that Madam Yu would actually end up murdering Wei Wuxian, since she was so terribly irate?

He knew now that his life was abnormally difficult in Lotus Pier. But at least it made sense to him. Now nothing did. With so many questions and so much confusion, his words clogged in his throat and died.

Lan Zhan didn't seem to mind. He pulled Wei Ying into his home, offered him tea, and then settled behind the guqin to play something that soothed the headache brewing behind Wei Ying's eyes. It was so peaceful in the house - so very like Lan Zhan that Wei Wuxian couldn't see him living anywhere else. Time slipped away for a bit. Wei Wuxian sipped his (surprisingly delicious and non-medicinal) tea, and his posture became more sloppy and sprawled the longer he sat and listened. Lan Zhan didn't scold him. The house was set far enough away from the rest of the compound that the only sounds from outside was the rustling of wind through the trees.

It was lovely.

Maybe usually he would be restless with such quiet, but for today... for today it felt surprisingly like home.

 

---

 

When Nie Huaisang returned, he didn't come alone. He brought food, as promised - a basket tucked under one arm rather than just a few random snacks - and he brought Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen in his wake. Wei Wuxian, who had graduated from sitting slumped at the table to sprawling in the window seat, blinked owlishly at the sudden company when Lan Zhan paused his playing to greet the newcomers.

"Sorry, I couldn't steal aCheng away, I don't think he's getting out of direct eyesight of at least one of his parents for a while now. I did round up the dages though. Lanlaoshi didn't say you couldn't get outside opinions as to what to put in your contract, and I figured you'd listen to them even if you wouldn't listen to me." Nie Huaisang explained breezily as he started setting out the stacked containers inside his basket. "And just remember, anything the Lan offer, the Nie could probably match, along with unlimited time with my personal library."

Lan Zhan looked predictably dour at the mention of the spring books, glaring daggers at Nie Huaisang's back while Nie Mingjue laughed and Lan Xichen looked amused. Wei Wuxian peeled himself off of the window seat and meandered over to flop next to Nie Huaisang.

"Mmm, feed me and we'll talk." Wei Wuxian offered, though he already knew the Lan had one point in their favor that the Nie never would. It was the Lan who showed him what was possible. Never mind how while Nie Huaisang's personal library might be unrivaled for its type, the Lan had the best library he could hope to get his hands on. He'd have to be mad to give that up now.

Before aSang could feed him, Lan Zhan settled abruptly on his other side and started putting together a bowl, all full of Wei Wuxian's favorites of the dishes being served up. Thankfully, there were some dishes with actual spice to them, as a nod to the Nie's tastes. Pointedly, Lan Zhan placed the bowl in front of Wei Wuxian with a snap of the chopsticks across the bowl.

"Awww, thank you Lan Zhan!" He chirped, grinning as Lan Zhan nodded and started to make a bowl for himself.

That was the other way the Nie would never be able to compete with the Lan in this - Lan Zhan. Now, to be completely honest, Lan Zhan hadn't breathed a word of anything beyond friendship. He barely said anything about friendship at that, but Wei Wuxian was becoming very well skilled at translating Lan Zhan's silences. And while Lan Zhan very much hadn't said anything at all...

He kept doing things like this. The cloak, the meals brought up from Caiyi after difficult days when he couldn't leave the watch of the healers, the time spent debating talisman theory... little things. Things that were something a bit beyond friendship. He'd thought about it, as he'd sprawled for the last few hours, listening to Lan Zhan sooth his battered nerves with skilled Lan techniques.  There was something about aSang's commentary that had nudged the feeling from 'this is a wild supposition' to a potential logical theory. He wasn't in a hurry to prod it further, content to let Lan Zhan decide what he wanted to do. There was time enough, now. Wei Wuxian also needed time - growing up he never spared much of a thought towards marriage beyond knowing vaguely it'd probably be something used to further the interests of the Jiang. There'd never been anyone he'd liked enough to consider spending a life with... but with Lan Zhan, it seemed like a fabulous adventure, rather than something that might tether him down.  He caught a glimpse of Lan Xichen's smug grin, and ducked his head. He guessed he wasn't the only one to notice Lan Zhan's attention. His nagging worry that a sect heir should be setting his sights on someone from the gentry withered and died - if Lan Zhan's brother didn't have any objections, why should he?

Poor Nie Huaisang, he was campaigning in vain. Wei Wuxian was going to let him keep doing it though, he seemed to be having a lot of fun.

Bracketed between his brother and his friend, listening to the two older cultivators bicker with each other, Wei Wuxian tucked into his dinner peacefully.

 

---

 

The Jiang contingent were going to leave Cloud Recesses. The news caused a bit of a buzz, as there was still half of the usual year to go, and usually the only reason cultivators left early is if there was family tragedy or they were kicked out for poor behavior. Rumor, which flew just as fast in Cloud Recesses as anywhere else despite the rules, said that Madam Yu was upset by the decision - she knew that her children would be missing valuable time to make connections amongst their piers. For once, however, Sect Leader Jiang would not be swayed. He wanted all of his disciples home.

He did not ask to speak to Wei Wuxian again.

He also did not allow Jiang Cheng out of his sight, and it was rumored that Madam Yu was staying with Jiang Yanli. Wei Wuxian was left to fret that he would not get to say goodbye to his siblings, the part of Yunmeng Jiang that he would miss the most.

The whole mood of Cloud Recesses was reserved and tense, the heavy winter clouds suiting the brooding atmosphere below. Wei Wuxian knew the other visiting disciples were working themselves to a fever pitch with gossip, and there would be endless questions once the Jiang left and he remained.

Classes had been cancelled while the delegation from Yunmeng were in Cloud Recesses, and Wei Wuxian's extra projects had been put on hold as well, leaving him to stew. ASang and Lan Zhan did their best to distract him - aSang brought games and art and all of the very best gossip, and Lan Zhan brought music and food from Caiyi Town and supervised sparring. Wei Wuxian was grateful. Things could be worse. No one had said anything about him giving up Suibian, and he kept any questions he had on that front behind his teeth - if he ever dared to ask, it would be once the Jiang were very far away from Cloud Recesses. He didn't want anyone getting any ideas.

Wei Wuxian was entirely on edge, and it was only the knowledge that both the Lan and the Nie had gone out on a limb for him that kept him from doing something rash in an attempt to say goodbye. He would see them again. It might not be soon, but he would - they were siblings now, for real and for keeps, and no one got to take that away.

Still.

He knew when they were going to leave. Lan Zhan had to go be present on his uncle's orders, Lan Qiren, being still incensed at the Jiang leadership, was determined to show his displeasure in any borderline polite way possible, including having the entire main family watching, unbowing and unsmiling, as the Jiang left Cloud Recesses. Lan Zhan left Wei Wuxian with aSang, hoping that his brother would provide enough distraction and support that Wei Wuxian would not try anything rash.

Wei Wuxian feigned a headache and told aSang he was going to take a nap. While aSang was wily enough to clear a spot on the daybed for Wei Wuxian to recline, a spot that just happened to be within direct view of where aSang was painting his latest fan, he wasn't wily enough to spot Wei Wuxian activating a paper man.

The little slip of paper flitted through Cloud Recesses, hitching a ride on the sleeve of an unsuspecting Lan junior, in a basket of vegetables, and in the hems of a Nie senior's robes in turn. The last courtyard he had to cross without shield, but he managed through good timing and some incredible luck. There at the last stairwell down to the gate, he spotted Lan Zhan, and scrambled up his robes to perch on his shoulder.

"Wei Ying?" Lan Zhan's voice was soft, worried, but he kept still, and didn't give away Wei Wuxian's trick. Wei Wuxian waved at Lan Zhan, doing a quick pirouette before settling back in the shelter of Lan Zhan's hair.

Before him was the Jiang contingent, heading out the gate. Madam Yu didn't even pause to turn around, evidently feeling just as angry as Lan Qiren.  Jiangzongzhu, however, paused. When he bowed, it was exactly the degree required between two sect leaders, but not a fraction of an inch more. The Jiang cultivators followed suit, again only as low as they needed to, but no further.

Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli bowed deeply, and held it a beat longer than the others. The others had already turned to go by the time they started to rise, so Wei Wuxian felt safe enough to step out of the shelter of Lan Zhan's hair to an open spot on his shoulder and bow back, before bouncing up to wave furiously at them. Jiang Yanli spotted him first, a quick spark of a smile lighting her face, before she nudged her brother and nodded. His face warmed from its previous misery when he spotted Wei Wuxian's little paper man, and the crooked smile on his face when he rolled his eyes meant everything.

They were alright. They were going to be alright. It would just be a matter of time, and suddenly he had all the time he could ask for.

Notes:

Were there Nie cultivators stationed the entire way from the Lan inner clan compound to the main gate to 'accidentally' give a certain paper man a ride?

Yes.

Yes there were.