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I guess I should tell you guys how this happened.
My dad was an emotionally abusive bigoted asshole and is the source of my mental health problems. I think I was 11 when I first started having suicidal thoughts (I'm currently 13). My parents would always argue and scream at each other and yell about divorcing. But one night, my dad went to far, and my mom left. She went to live with my grandma for a little while until she could afford an apartment. My dad was a stay at home dad and my mom worked, and when my mom left he refused to get a job for a really long time. She had to pay are rent and food for me, my dad, and my brother.
Eventually she could afford to get an apartment with her boyfriend, who I'll call Jim. It was nice to finally be away from him, but the things he said still hurt. After a little bit, my mom made me start therapy. I was mostly honest with my therapist, but I didn't mention my suicidal thoughts or choking myself, because my mom has enough stress in her life, plus it was really hard to say.
Eventually, after a really bad night, a had a therapy session where I planned to tell the truth. It was getting worse, I needed more help, and this was the only way I would get it.
My mom didn't want to put me in a mental hospital, so until they could finally find a residential, I couldn't be left alone in the house like I used to be. When both my mom and Jim weren't home, my grandma would be. It was a little annoying sometimes, but it was understandable.
After a few weeks of waiting, I was finally able to get into a residential about an hour and a half from where I live. It sure was an experience.