flawless execution//nate jacobs

by deliriousgrl

Summary:

"Do you really crave a life that's not beholden to me?" ⊹ ࣪ ˖₊˚⊹⋆

...
⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖
you're nate jacobs new obsession, and he won't stop until he gets what he wants.

Chapter 1: one 𐙚⋆°.

nate first noticed her when he was out with maddy and kat, their new shy little friend following them around at the mall. maddy had her hand in his, squeezing tightly as she dragged him to victoria's secret. the shy little friend followed behind hesitantly, a blush creeping up her cheeks as the barely clothed mannequins caught her eyes. he watched her from the corner of his own eye, maddy and kat busy rummaging through the discount thongs. she seemed so out of place in the store and he couldn't help but be captivated by her seemingly innocent appearance. as he dropped them off that night his gaze lingered on her some more, watching as she followed kat into her house, her eyes on the ground as she walked, her modest dress swaying by her knees. he couldn't help himself that night, searching her up on every social media possible, maddy asleep on the bed beside him as he secretly hoped to find out more of the shy mouse he had only just met. he searched facebook and nothing, then tik tok, nothing. it was only when he searched instagram that he finally had a lead, like a fucked up detective, deviously searching for his prime suspect. he clicked on her profile, his fingers clutching the sides of his phone tightly. he licked his lips as he thumbed through her photos one by one. it seemed to be mostly sunsets and cats, the occasional cover of what book she was reading that month as well. finally, a photo of her face caught his eye. it had been posted around a year ago but she looked near identical to now, her long hair curled, a pink headband on the top of her head. her wide doe eyes and soft smile, hiding slightly behind her plump pink lips. he was taken aback, finding his own heart racing as he took the photo in, silently memorizing every one of her features. maddy stirred from beside him and it finally broke him out of his trance, her naked torso peeking from beneath his duvet. he swallowed before scrolling away from the shy strangers profile, and sitting his phone down to charge. he laid his head back against his pillows, his mind racing. he had never been so captivated by someone before. his mind continued to drift, his stomach twisting as he pictured the heart shaped locket she had been wearing that day in the mall, nestled tightly to her chest. who was she really? maddy had only said she was new to town, moving from some random town in Iowa with her father. nate couldn't sleep, even as maddy pressed her body into his, he was restless.

that week at school, he tried to get there early, trying to figure if she drove or who dropped her off. his phone kept lighting up in the passenger seat of his truck, seeing maddy's name pop up over and over. as fucked as it was, he was ignoring her, too busy with his new hyper fixation to even stomach maddy's drama. he sat in the school's parking lot, his eyes scanning to see different students coming in or getting dropped off, searching for her like prey. he finally spotted her as a red car stopped in front of the school's entrance, her body popping out from the car and standing on the side walk. he watched her silently, her long hair in waves and her small form covered by the long pink sundress she was wearing, a small cream cardigan on her shoulders. his breath caught in his throat as he watched her wave to whoever had dropped her off goodbye, her small hands gripping the arms of her back pack.

as he watched her enter the school, his eyes searched the red car, memorizing the license plate and getting a glance of who was behind the wheel. it looked to be an older man, possibly her father with grown out facial hair and grey hair. he watched as the man drove through the parking lot before nate started his own truck, the key making the loud engine come to life.

his thought process with simple, investigate who her father was, where he worked, and follow him home to see where she lived. nate silently prayed it was a nice neighborhood, his jaw clenching at the thought of the small girl surrounded by no good criminals and drug addicts. he followed behind her-maybe- fathers car, only one other vehicle separated them. he had to be careful, he didn't want to draw any sort of attention to himself, make the man driving uneasy or aware he was being followed. but he seemed fine, even stopping off at the mcdonald's drive thru to get some breakfast. nate sat in the parking lot as he watched, rolling his eyes. did the man even have a job? was he providing the best life possible for his innocent little girl? nate swallowed, turning and following the car again as he drove out of the drive thru and back onto the highway. soon enough the red car was turning into a neighborhood, nate didn't recognize it, he'd never been to this part of town though he'd lived there all his life. he drove behind him slowly, his eyes glancing around at the many houses. they were modest sizes, more middle class and definitely nothing like the large home he lived and grew up in. a couple were abandoned, paint chipped off and doors boarded shut, windows broken with glass scattered on the worn porches. that didn't sit right with nate, he wondered if there were any creeps hiding out, maybe the shy girl had a stalker just waiting for his time to pounce. he swallowed, unable to stop his train of thought before the red car pulled into a house at the end of the street, a two story home with white siding and blue shutters. he studied it for a moment as he drove past, careful not to drive too slowly as to get caught as the older man jumped out of the vehicle and headed to the front door. he drove down to the end of the block before making a u-turn in his enormous truck, luckily nate was a skilled driver. he drove back slowly through the neighborhood again and reach the house, stopping his truck behind a couple of cars parked on the street as he studied the home. the man driving must've made it inside, no sight of him anywhere now. nate furrowed his brows as he looked at the small home, the front door had a screen door attached, the porch was a little worn, the roof seemed to be in good shape. he silently wondered if her bedroom was upstairs or downstairs, trying his best to imagine the layout of the older home. a small white picket fence surrounded the front yard, and a bundle of roses had been planted right by the house. he imagined the shy girl, on her knees, planting the flowers to make her small home seem nicer from the outside, how she'd smiled as she watched them grow and made sure to water them everyday. it was then that one of the curtains behind an upstairs window fluttered open, he hoped it wasn't her father, aware his house was being watched. but no, he took a breath as he saw a large white cat, it's eyes looking at the birds flying outside. he recognized it from her instagram, he knew he had the right place. he stayed there for another fifteen minutes, scoping out the neighborhood for traffic and any signs of bad people, but nothing. soon enough, he started his loud truck up again and headed back to his high school, he'd be able to make it to second period and hopeful to avoid maddy at all costs, though he knew he had to keep up appearances.

later in the school day, maddy had final spotted him, pursing her lips in that awful angry way he hated and furrowing her thin, perfectly groomed brows as she walked up to him. he sighed internally, ready to hear a mouthful. "where the fuck have you been?" she barked, looking up at him through her long fake lashes.

he rolled his eyes, "no where. just slept in late." it wasn't his best lie, but he felt that she had no right to question him, he could do what he wanted and she damn well did what she pleased. they bickered back and forth before he took her small hand into his, reaching up and running his lips over her knuckles making her shut up and soften her gaze. he was always so easily forgiven, but she was also so easily manipulated when she wasn't constantly gossiping to her friends about their relationship. he hated that. once the bell rang, nate gave maddy a soft kiss to the forehead as she headed to lunch, he was supposed to have economics but he decided to skip, in hopes of spotting his new target. and he did, and she took his breath away as she walked down the crowded hall, her books pressed tightly to her chest, her long pink sundress swaying as she walked. he stood against a wall, away from her view as he peeked around to watch her. she walked down the hall alone as other students made their way to class, her eyes on the floor as she hurried. he pressed himself against the wall, away from her, as she walked closer. he heard her take a breath before she entered the class room in front of where he was hiding, he had to fight the urge to just reach out and take her, hide her away from the world and make her his. his dark eyes gazed up at the door, ap english. that was his way in.

that evening, instead of following the shy girl home as she drove with her father in the small red car, nate had to reluctantly drive maddy home. he drove silently, his hand on her thigh as her loud rap music played through the speakers in his truck. she sung along, her voice never missing a word as she put her hand over top of his. he glanced over to her, a smile on her lipstick painted lips. she really had no idea and he planned to keep it that way. after a make out session in the backseat of his truck, maddy finally peeled herself away from him, telling him she loved him and going into her home. nate got up into the front seat, his long legs hitting the floorboard of his truck as he settled himself in. he couldn't deny what he had just imagined as he pressed his lips to maddys, her shy friend invading his mind. he imagined how she would taste as he gave maddy tongue, he imagined how her flesh would feel under his hands as he pressed his fingers into maddys slim thighs. he had lost himself in his own wicked imagination, pretending he had tangled his fingers in maddys friends hair, squeezing gently as maddy had moaned into his mouth. nate would've felt bad if he wasn't who he was, he knew morally that it was probably wrong of him to think what he was thinking, to do what he'd been doing, but he was far too gone now. he knew he was fucked up, but god dammit, maybe he finally found a small angel that would ease his worries and pain. be his perfect little slice of heaven.

it didn't do without some minor manipulation and convincing to the older woman before him, the guidance counselor, as he fought to get moved into ap english. he'd even mentioned Cals name, his father, if that's what it would take to transfer. of course now miss evan's couldn't refuse him, or his fathers name. and so, his second class period matched perfectly with his conquest, and he couldn't be happier he'd gotten away with it. he let maddy kiss him in the hall between classes, his hands draping far too low on her body to seem school appropriate, but his mind was somewhere else entirely, his eyes flickering to the clock on the wall, waiting until it was finally time to enter his new english class. maddy walked away with kat, telling him that they were going to skip and head to the mall, begging nate to give them a ride because of course she wanted to spend all the time she could with him. but nate refused, earning a pout and a few curses his way from the short, tan skinned girl who loved him. he didn't care though, even as he watched them walk away, he felt his chest flutter with excitement that it was finally second period, finally time to see his new prize.

it was like he had hit the jackpot as he entered the classroom, behind everyone else who'd made their way to their seats. he had to stop himself from grinning as he noticed her sitting in the back, an empty desk beside of her. it was his lucky day. nate walked over to the desk casually, putting his back pack in the floor beside him and pulling out his notebook. he kept his eyes away from her, not wanting to stare and catch her attention. nate knew he had to be smart, had to bide his time before it was time to pounce on the shy girl. he licked his lips as mrs. gonzales stepped into the classroom, beginning class. she noticed nate in the back right away, her lips in a small smile. "well mister jacobs, i see you've transferred into my class," she said softly, her gaze meeting his. he gave her a weak smile as everyone else turned to look at him, and in the corner of his eyes his special prize flickered her gaze to him as well. he just nodded, waiting for the short english teacher to either make a snide remark or tell him about the class. his eyebrows rose as mrs. gonzales called on the shy mouse beside him and he finally allowed himself to look at her. she was wearing an off white sweater that was tight enough to show off her upper body, making nate's mouth run dry. the gold heart shaped locket she always wore was pressed against her chest, her hair falling in soft waves across her shoulders. nate kept his expression blank, but his body was feeling much more. "if you don't mind, please help mister jacobs get caught up on the reading. we all need to be on the same page," mrs. gonzales said to her, a smile on her lips. the anxious girl nodded, just as nate thought, she was the perfect teachers pet. it was then that her eyes met his, the pink gloss on her lips holding a shy smile. nate just nodded to her, acknowledging her existence finally and feeling his chest ache with longing. being this close to her would prove challenging, especially if she'd be talking to him about whatever book the class had been reading. he finally returned his gaze to mrs. gonzales teaching, finding out they were reading the giver. class ended, the time going by more quickly than nate had liked, wanting to be just in the girl's presence a little longer. he slowly stood up, pulling his back pack around his arm and going up to the front of class to collet his copy of the giver. the shy girl followed him up there, mrs. gonzales face lighting up as she spoke to her. "thanks for agreeing to help nate get caught up, i'd suggest getting together sometime before class tomorrow, showing him your notes," she said, her hands reaching up to hand nate the novel. nate nodded his head and the girl beside him flickered her eyes up to look at him, their height difference drastic. nate couldn't deny that it was a turn on, to see her big doe eyes looking up at him from
below. he loved how small she was, how easy it would be to pull her around and lift her. it was something he always enjoyed about maddy, her form short and her body petite. they walked together and nate tried to find the right combination of words to rightfully introduce himself. he kept his voice soft, knowing the deepness of his tone could be seen as intimidating.

"i really appreciate you agreeing to help me out," he said softly, his large hand gripping the book in his grasp. she nodded, a shy smile on her lips.

"it's no problem," she replied, holding her things to her chest. nate noticed her notebook was covered with butterflies during class, her handwriting neat as she took notes and highlighted important things with her pink highlighter. he liked that, how even though she was so quiet and timid, she still expressed herself with the small feminine things she enjoyed. they were walking so close, side by side and he could smell a fresh citrus perfume coming off of her, his stomach turning under his black hoodie.

"you don't have to if you don't want to," nate assured her, giving her a choice even if he knew she was too polite to refuse. he liked how obedient she seemed, how she immediately listened to a teachers request and planned to follow through. he wondered what he could convince her to do in the future, how her politeness and willingness to help others would come in handy for his own selfish desires. she shook her head, her perfect smile shy but full as her cheeks warmed up from his words. nate loved it, maybe too much, as he felt his desire stir in his jeans.

"i really don't mind. w-we can talk about the first few chapters before class tomorrow," she said softly, her quiet voice soothing to nate's ears. maddy was always so loud and direct, the little shy mouse's voice from beside him was a breath of fresh air. just as he had the thought, maddy spotted them in the hall, smiling as she walked up to him. he guessed her and kat made it back from the mall in time for third period, a surprise as he thought they'd skip the rest of the school day. he smiled at his girlfriend, keeping up appearances and leaning down to give her a peck to her warm skin.

"hey you," she flirted, her brown eyes fluttering up at him. "and you," she said poking the shy girls shoulder. he watched as they exchanged hellos and plans to hang out over the weekend at kats, and he silently wondered what on earth the girl beside him would have in common with maddy and kat. he knew he had to find a reason as to why he would be talking to her, maddys jealousy always coming up whenever he was around another female. he draped his long arm around her waist, pulling maddy closer to him before he spoke.

"i switched classes," he said, his eyes moving to the shy girl as he held maddy close, "i got tired of mr. lawrence's impossible pop-quizzes." he lied too easily, a talent he learned when he was a child. maddy nodded her head, her expression slightly confused but she seemed to buy his answer.

"so you chose ap english?" maddy said, furrowing her brows. nate wasn't the best student but he kept decent grades, it probably seemed strange to her that he'd pick an advanced class, but he'd aced regular english classes plenty of times. nate liked to read, especially books that had good twists and turns. he wasn't really open about it, but nate was a complex person, he had many secrets, some he'd keep until his grave. secretly reading seemed like nothing when he compared them to other things he'd done, and even enjoyed.

eventually maddy and him walked away from the shy girl, her soft voice giving them a 'see ya' and her delicate hands moving to open her locker. he held maddy close to his tall form, his hands on the exposed skin on her back due to her crop top. before their next class nate leaned down and let maddy wrap her arms around his neck, her lips meeting his before the next bell rang and a swarm of students hurried through the hallway. she reluctantly let him go and headed to lunch. he kissed her goodbye, his mind far away. he looked down the hall for the shy girl, watching as she pulled a water bottle out of her locker and grabbed her books for her next class. he leaned himself against some lockers behind him as he watched her, she was completely unaware, which in the moment, nate was thankful for. she was so fascinating to watch, yet he could read her so easily. it would be a matter of time before his lips were pressed against hers before classes, her tiny body would be attached to his like glue and he'd only have her begging for more. maddy on the other hand, would be a problem. a big one.

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

hope you enjoy! there aren't many nate fics that i enjoy so i decided to write my own. i'm no professional by any means but i try haha let me know if there's any ideas or suggestions you have. i also am posting this to tumblr so follow me xx
@/deliriousgrl-writes <3

Chapter 2: two 𐙚⋆°.

Summary:

content warning//this chapter contains explicit sexual themes. read at your own risk.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

 

nate slammed into maddy with a brutal force, his movement hard and fast. he was fucking her against his bathroom counter, her moans filling the air. "yes, nate, yes!" she cried, her mascara running down her face. he liked this position and place, but everytime he couldn't help but look at his own reflection in the mirror as her ass pressed into his hips. his muscles were flexing, his teeth pressed into his bottom lip as he watched himself plow into her, his release close. he didn't mind having sex with maddy, but his mind was still elsewhere. he could see it in his own eyes, nate's expression in the mirror clouded by thoughts of maddys shy little friend. maddys moans continued and he kept his pace, rapid and vigorous, working out his sexual frustrations. he couldn't help but be excited for the next day, knowing that before his english class the shy little mouse would be talking to him, her soft voice describing what had happened in the novel they had been reading in class; the giver.

nate came hard, visions of the heart shaped locket against her chest in his minds eye, her delicate hands and pink lips. it was all too much, consumed by even the thought of the way her wide doe eyes had looked up at him as they'd walk down the hall the day before. he groaned, egging maddy on more as she whimpered loudly. he wasn't after her pleasure, the truth was he never had been their entire relationship. nate took, that was his way, he was well aware of that aspect of himself. he slipped out of maddy, watching as her petite body almost fell as her knees buckled. he hadn't counted on going so rough on her but he'd been struggling, so worked up, utterly enthralled in his fantasies of his new conquest. he snapped himself out of it, grabbing maddy by her shoulders and helping her stand up before pressing her against his now sweaty chest. she sighed against him and said she loved him.

the truth was nate loved maddy too, or he thought he did. they were awful for each other, he knew that, but she was always there when he called her. even after they'd broken up for the hundredth time, she'd answer his call, cuss him out, and then show up at his front door. but love wasn't enough, nate was exhausted by her drama and the constant fighting between them, he felt that she was too controlling. it was too masculine to him, the way she obsessed and possessed him. he wanted someone docile, someone who knew how to listen and not rebel, someone easier for him to control. as he let maddy cuddle against him under his sheets, them both naked, he stared at the ceiling of his bedroom. he knew he had to come up with a way to break things off with her but maddy was so damn stubborn. it would be hard to shake her. and at the end of the day if he couldn't win over his timid new obsession–but he knew he would–he'd be able to have maddy back that next week. nate was a planner, he waited for the right time, patiently waited to execute his plans. and now his plan was to get maddy out of the picture. he didn't want to hurt her, though he knew he would, it was impossible not to since she was so in love with him. he felt her snuggle close to him, her small hands caressing his stomach as she drifted off to sleep. nate wanted to feel bad, feel some sort of sympathy or guilt, but it was like he was incapable of it. he knew what he wanted now, who he wanted. and he was tired of acting like he could be the person maddy wanted him to be for her, it would never happen. he had to let her go.

the next morning, as he and maddy entered the kitchen for breakfast, nate's mother rolled her eyes. she wasn't a big fan of maddy, and rightfully so as maddy could be obnoxious and rude. someone could give her the wrong look and it would set her off. it used to charm nate, but now it annoyed him. he didn't care what his mother thought though, or his father, they could either live with his decisions or kick him out. and god knows they don't want the whole town talking about how the jacob's couple kicked out their teenage son over a girl. maddy and him headed out to his truck. he opened the door for her as he always did, helping her small figure jump into the tall seat. as they drove, maddy sucked down an iced coffee he had stopped and got her at a local gas station, her eyes glued to her phone and her mouth going a mile a minute about how her friend BB was being a bitch lately. nate kept his eyes on the road, trying his best to act like he was listening by nodding every now and then. maddy didn't seem convinced. "you don't even care about what i'm saying, do you?" she asked, narrowing her eyes at him.

nate had to stop himself from sighing, of course she was going to start a fight and ruin the morning. "maddy," he said, furrowing his brows as he kept his eyes on the road, "stop." he heard her huff from beside him, slamming her ice coffee into the cup holder and rolling her window down. he watched her out of the corner of his eye, wondering how he was going to break it off. nate and maddy had broken up more times than he could count, he'd broken up with her, she was usually the one to break up with him. how could nate convince her that this would be the last time? that he wasn't planning on calling her a week later or answering her many texts when she got lonely at night?

"you've been quiet lately," she said from beside him, nate had just stopped at a red light. she really was wanting a fight, nate thought to himself, she's just asking for it. nate swallowed and ran his hand through his hair, the hand on the steering wheel gripping it until his knuckles were white. he turned to face her, his lips in a aggravated line.

"do you always have to be so fucking annoying?" he spit, his expression full of disdain. maddy opened her mouth to speak, her expression a mixture of anger and sadness. nate continued, "i mean, we're driving to fucking school, maddy. we see each other every day. am i the bad guy if i don't want to listen to your stupid friends problems?"

"she's not stupid! and couples are supposed to talk, you just don't want to hear about my life," maddy yelled, her long manicured nail pointing at him. the stoplight finally turned green and nate gunned it, going well over the speed limit at he spoke.

"you have no idea what's going on in my life either," he said sternly, pressing harder on the gas pedal, "everything i do or say is a god damn problem for you."

maddy slammed her hands on the dash, watching the road as nate zoomed by each car. "you're fucking crazy! what? are you trying to kill us?" her high pitched voice rang in nate's ears, making him even more agitated. good, he thought, maybe if he makes her mad or scared enough she'll give him space for the rest of the day. so he decided not to hold back.

he turned his truck forcibly into the schools parking lot. maddy yelled a string of curses at him as he slammed into a parking space, sending her body forward and watching as her back hit the seat behind her roughly. "you fucking psycho!" she yelled.

"just shut the fuck up and get out of the truck, maddy," he spat, his dark eyes burning into hers. she furrowed her brows at him and pointed her finger at him before she spoke once more.

"i can't fucking stand you," she said lowly, before she grabbed her things and opened the door and jumped out of his truck. he watched as she made her way to the schools entrance, her heels clicking as she walked. once she finally made it inside, he leaned back against his seat, rubbing his face as he let out a breath. it was a small, stupid argument, nothing of real substance. he knew it wouldnt be enough to get rid of her though, so maybe he'd just avoid her. though maddy was known to make a scene no matter what and he couldn't have her shy friend see that and get the wrong impression. he let out a groan before slamming his fist against the steering wheel of his truck, trying to hold himself back from just driving away. it wasnt until he thought of the fact that his new prize would be waiting for him before english class to talk that he finally stepped out of his truck. he'd enjoy his time with her today, look forward to it and push maddy far from his mind. he needed to stay focused.

as nate walked the halls of his highschool, his algebra notebook in his large hand, he kept his mind focused. second period was all he had to look forward to, all he had to care about today. as he sat through algebra, his teacher mister hendricks writing equations on the board, nate felt his nerves kick in. he wasn't sure why, he usually had no problems talking to girls. nate was charismatic when he wanted to be, he could put up a good front, have girls begging for more. every girl he had been with craved his attention, and he knew exactly when to give it and when to withhold it. but if he wanted to win this one over he had to be smart. she was shy, hesitant even. he could see in her wide doe eyes how sensitive she probably was, he had to be careful. he was used to girls who were loud about what they wanted from him, the girls that would get on their knees and beg for his pleasure. this one was different, he had to build this relationship and try not to scare her away in the process.

he tapped his foot impatiently, his eyes darting to the clock above the whiteboard in the classroom. nate had to calm himself down, he had to feel confident and calm. he cursed himself internally, reminding himself not to be such a spaz, stop fidgeting, stop breathing so fast, be the man people think you are.

as the bell rang students rushed out of the classroom, nate took a breath, grabbing his things and heading out the door behind a swarm of classmates. as he made his way down the hallway and down the steps, he stopped for a moment, his eyes scanning the halls as students made their ways to their lockers, the sounds of metal opening and slamming shut. he was cautious to avoid maddy if she were around, his eyes searching for her in the sea of highschool students, but luckily for him she was no where to be seen. he was hard to miss, with his tall stature and intimidating demeanor, she would find him. but she didn't, and nate was thankful for that.

he walked down the hallway quickly, students passing by him. he saw her at the end of the hall, her back pressed against her locker as she seemed to be searching for someone. nate's stomach twisted as he realized the shy girl was searching for him, the thought making his insides twitch was bliss. he swallowed before making his way to her, his hands in his pockets as he stood beside her. "hey," he breathed out, keeping his deep voice gentle as he peered down at her. he watched her smile shyly at him, her hands holding her butterfly notebook and novel.

"hi," she said quietly, avoiding his eyes. he liked that, the way she seemed too nervous to face him. he knew he couldn't have her like that for long, she needed to be comfortable with him, needed to be at ease if his plan would be put into motion. so he spoke back to her, his hand reaching up to scratch the back of his head and a smile on his face.

"so, uh, what have i missed?" he said coyly, his dark eyes blinking down at her.

the girl shifted awkwardly, her voice quiet and soft as she spoke, "well mrs. gonzales told me to show you some of my notes, uh, the class has just read the first few ch-chapters."

nate enjoyed her subtle stammering, the small stutter from nervousness making her even more endearing. he gave her a small smile, nodding his head. "here, let's talk over there," he said to her, pointing at the other staircase at the end of the hall. she walked beside him slowly, her hands still holding her things tightly to her chest. "i really appreciate this, i hope you know that. it surprised me that you agreed to catch me up, i probably could've just read it myself in the mean time. but still, thanks," nate said, keeping his voice soft as he sat down on the steps. she smiled at him awkwardly, blinking as she sat down beside him on the stairs, careful to keep a small distance between their bodies.

she adverted her eyes away from him and instead opened her notebook, nate's eyes immediately noticing her neat, cursive handwriting. he had to stop himself from smirking. he watched as her fingers went over the notes, the heart shaped bullet points beside each sentence on the page making nate only enjoy her innocence more. "right so, the main character is this teenager, jonas, and this world he lives in. it's devoid of color, everything is super controlled, even emotions..."

nate listened intently as she continued, his eyes flickering over her soft features as she spoke. she spoke eloquently, but not to nate's surprise, he knew she was smart. she went on to describe the novel more in depth, summarizing the first few chapters with ease. nate had to stop himself from smiling at her, of course his little prize would find a book like this captivating. she suddenly went quiet, noticing how she may have drone on for a bit too long. nate quickly spoke, filling the silence quickly. "sounds like a really messed up society," he said with a chuckle, his eyes glued to the way she gave him a small smile, "you seem to know all about this. have you read it before?"

her cheeks dusted a rosy pink, "yeah actually. a couple years ago."

"so this, uh, jonas, he's the only one who knows what's really going on, right?" he said softly, "like the whole messed up government controlling everything thing?"

she nodded, her hands reaching up to fidget with the gold heart shaped locket against her chest. she was nervous, nate thought, probably not used to being around someone like him. he wanted to prove her wrong about his reputation, anything she had heard. to others in the large high school, he was a star football player, a confident jock with a dramatic girlfriend on his arm. he didn't want her to be intimidated by him, though he knew she would be regardless. their extreme height difference alone would make her feel small. "i don't want to spoil anything, if you haven't read it. i-it's really good, different from all the other dystopian tropes in other books."

she was so sweet to him like this, fidgeting her her necklace and trying her best to keep a small distance between them. nate shifted from where he sat, his mind trying not to focus on the way her sweet, fruity perfume hit his nose as she moved. "you explain it better than most teachers," nate chuckled, watching as she finally turned to look at him. he smiled down at her, her cheeks still painted pink. "i don't mind if you spoil it a bit for me," he smirked. she looked away, letting a soft chuckle leave her plump lips.

"well, um, coming up all the teenagers are assigned their jobs. or like life paths, and jonas gets the highest position," she said, looking down at the novel in her lap, her eyes scanning the cover. "h-he gets to be the receiver of memories, which means he gets to see the way things were before everything was controlled."

"only him?" nate asked, keeping his facial expression curious. he had to keep up the act of being interested in the book if he wanted to keep her talking, he didn't want to act like he didn't care or blow her off. he needed to keep her talking.

"only him," she nodded, her voice a quiet murmur. she didn't seem like she wanted to spoil more so nate stopped himself from asking why, instead finding another way to compliment her, bring her confidence up so she'd like him more.

"well," nate breathed, giving her another smile, "you make it so sound interesting. i might have to read ahead now." she laughed at that, a real one, which only made nate's heart beat faster. "i'm serious. i wish you were teaching the class, i bet you could."

she shook her head, smiling with the blush still on her skin, "n-no, i just like the book. or uh, r-reading in general." nate gave her another warm smile, his hands itching to grab her own, to tell her how smart he thought she was and how much he wanted to taste the sweetness of her lips. but he couldn't, not yet.

"we should probably get to class," nate said, standing up. he decided to be bold, holding his hand out to help her up. he wanted to feel her small fingers around his if only for a moment, see how they felt in his large hand. she blinked up at him before taking his hand, her small fingers feeling like electricity against nate's skin. he helped her up politely and let her hand go quickly, not wanting to make her uncomfortable or come off too strong, though he wished he could hold her hand as they walked to class together. the bell rang just as they made it to the door of their ap english class and they entered the now filled classroom slowly, side by side. he watched mrs. gonzales mouth a thank you to the shy girl beside him, to which she nodded at. nate slipped into his desk, right beside the shy little mouses and he turned and smiled at her one more time, his voice soft as he thanked her again.

he licked his lips before he spoke, a couple of students still missing from the classroom and giving him a small window of time to talk to her more. "thanks again. you're a lot different than most people around here," he whispered to her, her eyes meeting his for a moment, "in a good way." she gave him a shy smile and nodded, opening up her notebook to prepare to take notes.

nate was over the moon as class went on, watching his shy conquest out of the corner of his eyes, wondering what kind of impression she had gotten of him. he knew he had played the situation well, she now knew he found her smart, interesting, different. he wondered if she was already starting to like him or if it would take some more convincing, but her small shy smile at him as he got up to leave class as the bell rang made him think he had succeeded at his task. he smiled back at her too, giving her a small wave as he exited the class.

nate's plan was already in motion. he just had one more thing to take care of before he could begin phase two; maddy.

Chapter 3: three 𐙚⋆°.

Summary:

content warning// this chapter contains explicit sexual themes

"what do you think you're doing, jacobs?" called his coach on the field, he blew his whistle as nate stood above the scrawny teammate he had just tackled. nate stood there, sighing to himself before throwing his helmet to the bright green grass beneath him, his hair a sweaty mess. he thought the kids name was craig, or michael maybe?

"where's your head?" his coach asked as he made his way over, exchanging a hand down to the wounded teammate on the ground. the guy got up with a groan, throwing his own helmet off in frustration.

nate let out a breath, his hands on his hips as he watched his couch walk away with the down teammate, eyes of the other teammates on the field watching the scene unfold.

practice was almost over and nate was distracted, something he hated to be in front of his teammates and coach. his mind was elsewhere, thinking of the many texts maddy had sent him before practice.

maddy: where tf are u?
maddy: ur being weird lately and i don't know how to talk 2 u
maddy: is this abt yesterday?
maddy: call me
maddy: forget it. k.

nate had tried to his best to shake the thoughts of stress away but he was struggling. he hadn't meant to tackle his teammate so roughly, the kind of hit that would leave a person in the hospital. luckily, the kid seemed fine. his coach on the other hand, was not happy. nate spit on the ground and saw a couple of his teammates walk over. he reluctantly met their gazes, not wanting this kind of interaction right now.

"you trying to kill people out here or what?" asked carter. nate didn't like carter much, hated his constant joking and incessant need to run around the locker rooms naked without a care. carter was stocky and strong, with red hair and freckles that scattered his nose and cheeks.

"shut it," nate replied, grabbing his helmet from the ground, "maybe that kid should learn how to block."

another boy beside carter, jace, spoke up, his dark skin and features eyeing nate up carefully. jace had his reservations about nate, never joking with him and sensing nate's ability to fly off the handle. "what's up man?" jace asked, a hint of sincerity in his tone. nate chuckled dryly, not wanting to look weak in front of his fellow teammates.

"i'm fine," nate said, starting to walk over to the refreshments table. carter and jace followed behind, leaving nate annoyed but he knew he had to keep up appearances.

"maddy seemed pissed yesterday," carter said with a laugh, grabbing a bottle of gatorade from the wide table, "i think she wants to chop your balls off or something."

nate rolled his eyes once more, taking a sip of water from the small red cup in his hands, "she's nothing i can't handle." carter nodded, sensing nate's dismissal of the subject of maddy.

nate's coach walked over to the boys, the whistle hanging from his chest swaying as he walked. "keep pulling this shit, jacobs, and i'll bench your ass for rest of the season," he said, pointing his finger in nate's face.

if there was one thing nate hated it was someone who acted like they knew better than him. sure, nate had tackled the kid a bit roughly but he was fine. nate was a good player, the best linebacker east high had ever saw, a small scrimmage incident during practice wouldn't change that. he looked to the ground for a moment, choosing his words carefully, "got it, coach. it won't happen again."

at the end of practice, nate was in the locker room changing in a stall, something he always did that stood out amongst the other guys. he heard carter and jace's voices echoing in the room, lockers shutting between words.

"he better get his head on straight if he wants to keep acting like he's the best on the team," he heard carter say. nate listened for a moment, pulling his shirt over his head as he heard jace's response.

"he's been weird lately," jace said, his voice booming and loud against the concrete walls of the locker room, "he didn't even go to mckays last saturday. maddy must have him on a short leash these days."

"she's a bitch," carter replied, "what do you expect?"

nate decided to exit the stall in that moment, carter and jace's eyes meeting his in surprise. "you think i'm stupid? that i don't have my shit together?" nate asked darkly, his eyes narrowing on the two boys. a menacing smirk was on his face, his tall height causing him to tower over the two boys.

carter let out a nervous laugh, shaking his head. "no man, we know you got it," carter said, his shirt still in his hands. jace nodded, wary of nate's next actions.

nate was loved and feared on the team. he always showed up for games, winning them more times than the team could count, but he had a reputation. nate could be a team player or a nightmare depending on what side you were on, he planned to keep it that way. instead of intimidating the boys further, nate had other plans. he slipped out of the locker room and into the almost empty parking lot by the field, his hand holding his still vibrating phone, knowing it was maddy texting him.

he put the key in the ignition and let his engine roar to life, his body slumping in his seat a bit as he checked his phone.

maddy: i'm not going to wait forever.
maddy: ur being ridiculous
maddy: fuck u, i'm done
maddy: why can't u just call me????

nate sighed to himself, the bright lights that illuminated the field shutting off and encompassing him in darkness. he decided to just turn his phone off before he pulled out of the school parking lot, heading onto the road, the headlights of his tall truck illuminating the road ahead brightly. he drove for awhile, trying his best to clear his head. thoughts of the day before entered his mind, the way his shy prize had spoke to him softly about the book from class, how her tiny hands had fiddled with the heart shaped locket that was usually nestled to her chest. he zoned out as he drove, picturing the differences between her and maddy.

the shy girl was so much more to him, the potential he saw in her far greater than maddys. he had loved maddy once, more than anyone he had loved before, but things changed. they fought more, she was more possessive than ever. sure they had broken up ten million times at this point, even fucking different people to make the other jealous, but now, nate wanted something different. he wanted something easy, something more perfect than he could ever imagined. the shy girl seemed more worthy of his attention than maddy now.

as he drove through the quiet neighborhood, his eyes scanned the houses once more, making sure to note any small changes. they were still the same, the same abandoned ones as well as the small family homes scattered about. he reach the white house, the chipped blue shudders and rose bush still by the entrance. the red car was parked in front, all the lights in the modest house appeared to be off except one, the upstairs. his eyes darted around for a moment, the darkness around him making him narrow his brown eyes up at the dim light coming from the upstairs window. nate reach over into the passenger seat beside him, his fingers wrapping around the handle of his handgun tightly. he couldn't help himself, his mind had wondered earlier that day, imagining how unsafe she may be if he wasn't around to protect her. he had watched her in english class earlier, her eyes never meeting his as the class studied and reviewed the giver. she paid attention, writing notes in her pink butterfly notebook and doodling drawings of clouds and moons on the pages.

nate had thought about all the horrible possibilities of his shy girl being hurt. how an older man would take a liking to her soft beauty, watching her until it was time for him to grab her and push her into his car, tying her up in his basement to have his way with her. or some college guy taking advantage of her, the power imbalance forcing her to look up to him, give herself to him and get hurt in the end. nate couldn't stand the thought; another man snatching her up and not being worthy of the pure and innocent ways in which she operated. she wasn't like the other girls at school, never wanting attention and preferring to stay in the background. nate didn't even know why maddy had became friends with her in the first place, maybe seeing her as a project. he didn't want the shy girl to change at all, maybe just her assumption of him. maybe just her feelings once she realized how much she needed someone like nate to take care of her, protect her.

he watched for an hour or two, his eyes focused on the upstairs light, the only one on in the small home. when he watched her silhouette arrive behind the dimly lit curtain to turn the light out, he held his breath, his handgun still clutched in his hand. how could he possibly leave now? she would be asleep, curled up in her bed, not knowing how much of a target she could be. she was more vulnerable asleep, never knowing who could just break in, someone breaking the screen door on her porch and breaking in through the front door. how'd she be so unaware if someone were to make their way up the steps to her, pulling the covers off her and covering her mouth as she was assaulted. he swallowed at the thought, clenching his jaw as he made sure to study the street around him once more, silently wandering to himself if he was the only one watching. hoping he was.

nate left four hours later, knowing he had to be able to get up for school the next day. after all he had to appear normal, had to keep his head on straight to not fuck things up. he was reluctant to leave the dark quiet neighborhood, his eyes glancing up at the upstairs window once more before he drove away.

he texted maddy back once he made it inside his large home, the extravagant decor a complete contrast to the people who inhabited the space. nate's eyes scanned the family portraits on the walls as he made his way up the stairs, internally cringing at how fake it all was. his father, cal, was very influential in the community. he had built many businesses and housing units in town, earning quite the living in the perfect suburbia he called home. though he held a dark secret, which nate knew about. that was his power over his dad. nate knew. he couldn't unsee it once he had, just a boy watching his father do despicable things to strangers on color coded tapes. nate wondered if maybe that was the moment something switched in him, but deep down he knew he was destined to be who he was from the start, sharing his fathers dna and all. as if on cue his father walked up the staircase, a glass of bourbon in his hand as he greeted his son.

"nathaniel," cal called, walking up to stand beside the tall boy, his arm reaching up to pat his tense shoulder, "where you been?"

nate wanted to scream at him, tell him he didn't need an explanation and to just keep his mouth shut, but he didn't. instead he replied back to his father in a hushed tone, his words icy. "doesn't matter. i'm going to bed."

cal let out a deep laugh, the sound making nate's fists clench at his sides. "that maddy.. she's a handful, i can see it. a distraction that you can not afford, son. straighten up. i heard about practice earlier tonight. how do you expect to make it on a team if you're trying to kill people?"

nate found it almost humorous how his father could talk about what he had done but never admit to what he was still doing. instead of protesting, nate just wanted to the conversation to be over. he looked at the older man at his side, his fathers aged face looking back at him with cold eyes. his father always seemed to be taunting him, searching for a reaction in nate that he wasn't willing to give. "i already told coach it won't happen again."

cal patted his sons shoulder again, his glass still in the other hand. "good. stay focused, nathaniel. if you do you'll do great things, i can see it. i've know it since you were born. you're a fighter, and some people, others, they don't like that. they'll try to distract you, want you to fail. but you're my son, you're much more than them."

his words seemed more melancholy than supportive, maybe even distant. nate just nodded before walking over to his bedroom door, leaving his father out in the hall and shutting the door behind him softly. nate despised his father.

nate: we need to talk. i'll drive u home after school.
maddy: ok?

nate shed his clothes and dropped his duffel bag to the floor of his room, his body tense and his mind still far away. his father was right about one thing; maddy was a distraction, a distraction from what he really wanted. who he really wanted.

he pictured the girl in his mind as he tried to sleep. he imagined her in bed with him, wearing nothing but a white lacy teddy, her soft skin pressed against his own, her wide eyes looking up at him with need. he let his mind wonder, the way her gold heart shaped locket would look, the rest of her bare as she'd pant beneath him, his hands running up her thighs, his fingers gripping the skin. he stroked himself beneath his duvet, his hand gripping himself as he let the images unfold in his mind. he could see it all so clearly, her on her knees before him, his fingers gripping her chin as her doe eyes stared up into his. he panted to himself at the image, how beautiful the sounds she would make would be. her soft voice whining as he took her nice and slow, dipping his cock deep inside her tight virgin walls, how her tiny fingers would grip his shoulders. how out of breath she would be from how full she would feel from him. he felt himself come undone, the hot liquid shooting up onto his stomach and between his fingers as he stroked himself to near overstimulation. he liked how it was almost painful, the sensation and thoughts in his head fueling his indescribable lust. his jaw clenched as he pulled himself up from his bed and into his bathroom, washing himself off and scrubbing himself clean. his thick cock was still hard and throbbing beneath his tight boxers as he looked himself in the eyes in the mirror. he let himself revel in the almost animalistic way his chest rose and fell rapidly, his eyes dilated until they were nearly black, the brown of his eyes gone. he had to have her, it wasn't a question or fantasy, he had to have her.

———

nate woke up only a few hours later so that he could work out before school. nate was strict about his daily regimen, work out until failure, take a shower, brush his teeth, fix his hair, the whole works. he liked being organized, making sure people saw him as someone put together.

he pushed himself hard that morning, laying on his bench press and groaning as he lifted the heavy weight. he liked pushing himself, stopping once all the muscles in his body were throbbing. being seen as strong was important to him, keeping his body in perfect shape and eating the right diet, it was easy for him to maintain routines, though he had been distracted lately. so, he pushed himself past his limits, his hands sore and rough once he was done.

after he popped into a cold shower, scrubbing himself with some expensive men's body wash and some conditioning shampoo, he did the rest of his routine and headed to school. he skipped breakfast, not wanting to be around his father that morning, not wanting to hear the sound of his voice.

once nate parked his truck into a free parking space by the school, his eyes scanned the cars dropping students off and spotting her. it was the same red car he knew of, her small body jumping out of the passenger seat and waving goodbye. she was wearing something nate had never seen before, a black tennis skirt that came down to the middle of her thighs and a matching tucked in black sweater. nate couldn't lie, the sight of her in such dark colors made desire stir in his jeans. and once she walked away from the car he could see cream ruffled socks above her white tennis shoes, making his head spin. he did much prefer her in bright, softer colors, but she was still perfect in his eyes. her hands held the straps of her back pack, her small form walking into the schools entrance, it was then that nate finally decided to step out of his truck.

his eyes scanned the hallways, his own backpack perched on his shoulder as his tall body walked past the other students. he stopped himself from stopping by her locker, wishing more than anything that he could see her, speak to her. but he was surprised when he saw her there already, maddy and kat by her side, talking. he backed away, going to his own locker and peaking out of the corner of his eye at the three girls as he pretended to rearrange the textbooks in his locker. maddy was wearing another revealing outfit as always, with bright pink leggings and a matching cropped tank top that showed off a bit too much to be considered school appropriate. he silently wondered if maddy and kat were to blame for the shy girls sudden change in appearance, now being able to make out a hint of makeup on her soft features, a sharp black eyeliner framing her doe eyes. his chest thumped with annoyance, not wanting her to try and fit in with the likes of maddy and kat. she was too special for that and much too innocent.

the rest of the school day was boring, nate kept his appearances though by chatting with his friends, the typical asshole football players from his team. he kept up his cruel and sarcastic attitude with them, not letting them think something was up with him. he had to make himself the leader still, had to make sure they knew who was in charge despite his recent m.i.a behavior. he laughed along with their jokes and stupid antics, pretending to be who he always was. once classes ended for the day he knew it was time, maddy hadn't spoke to him all day or sought him out, but he knew he was expected to drive her home and would need to execute his plan.

he was standing by his truck in the crowded parking lot, his eyes on the ground as he leaned against the silver metal. "hey," he heard her say, her tone a bit aggressive. he knew she had every right to be mad at him, he had been avoiding her after all. but it annoyed him nonetheless.

he looked down at her as she stood in front of him, her hands by her side and her expression perplexed. he wondered if she saw what was coming. "hey," he replied, keeping his voice especially soft for maddy, "let's go for a drive."

she nodded and walked over to the passenger seat, nate following behind her and helping her up the steep step up. once he had jumped into the drivers side, he put the key in the ignition and they were off. maddy was quiet for a moment and nate could feel her eyes on him as he focused on the road. the sun was already setting, the clouds and sky a bright orange as he drove down the busy streets.

"i thought you were just going to drive me home," maddy said, her big brown eyes narrowing on him.

"i thought we could go somewhere and talk," nate replied carefully, one hand on the steering wheel and then other rested against the window, his knuckles resting against his cheek as he tried to keep himself in check. he had already thought this through, how to play this situation. nate needed to find somewhere private to talk knowing that maddy would make a scene in public, so he drove to a nearby park right by the lake. maddy was silent in her seat and he could see her gears turning in her pretty head, already suspicious of the situation.

they arrived, his truck parked and the two of them jumping out and walking over to stand by the lake. "you really upset me," maddy said, her voice sincere as they walked by the body of water, the orange from the sky reflecting on the surface, "i mean... you're supposed to want to talk to me. you know you can talk to me."

a normal person would feel a bit of guilt at her words, maybe even debating on wether breaking up with her was the right idea if she loved them so much. but nate wasn't normal and he had his sights set on someone else. maddy would have to live with it, and the hundreds of other things he'd put her through.

"maddy," nate said, making sure his voice came out a bit erratic. he turned to face her, stopping her in her tracks and leaving a small gap between them. "i just.. i have to tell you something."

"what is it?" she asked, her eyes concerned. she blinked up at him, her hand reaching out to touch his shoulder. nate backed away before she could, putting on a show and running his hand through his hair to appear to be distressed.

"maddy.. i-i'm struggling. i'm having a hard time. which isn't your fault.. it's not your fault i'm so fucked up," he bit his lower lip, his jaw tensing. she looked up at him with worry and surprise at his words, her hands reaching out again.

"what-what do you mean? what's going on, nate? you can trust me," she soothed, her hand landing on his arm. her small fingers rested there and nate could feel the slight tremble they held.

"no," he uttered taking a step back from her. this time he put his hands on her shoulders, his grip on her tight, displaying a sense of urgency in his eyes, "you don't get it. you don't. i'm sorry you've gotten mixed up with someone like me, i'm not some normal fucking guy, maddy. i don't deserve you... i never have."

she looked confused, her thin brows pressing together as she took in his words and was held in his grip. he removed his hands from her shoulders, his fingers moving up to his face to press against the space between his eyebrows. this had to work, he had to make this all believable for her, she had to understand.

when she tried to speak, nate interrupted her harshly, his words stern. "i need you to walk away from this. from me. you need to keep yourself away from someone as fucked up as me. you need to save yourself from me before i hurt you. because i will. i have already."

she crossed her arms, licking her lips before she spoke, "what do you mean? i mean... i love you, nate. please tell me what's going on, i-i can help."

nate turned around and began walking away from her, the orange that the sky held finally gone dark as clouds covered the setting sun. you could already see the moon casting a small light on the water and against their bodies. maddy hurriedly caught up to him, her voice filled up empathy. "nate please! i want to understand. i'm perfectly capable of fucking understanding! i care about you, whatever you're going through, i care!"

nate kept his shoulders tense as he walked, breathing out a bit to stifle a sigh. he was trying to make this easy for her, as easy as he could but she loved him too much.

Notes:

˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

this is a long one, i hope the filler stuff wasn't too hard to read! and yes, this interaction with maddy will be continued into the next part and FINALLY some stuff will start happening between nate and reader<3 i hate for it to be slow pace but i enjoy a slow burn, i think it pays off way more hehe sorry abt it xx

don't forget to follow my tumblr @/deliriousgrl-writes ! i'm trying to pick up a following over there. i'm planning a felix catton from saltburn fic atm as well if u like him at all hehe i can't help it, jacob elordi is my muse at this point.

Chapter 4: four 𐙚⋆°.

nate was trying his hardest to make maddy believe him, to make her see what he was saying. though, he knew it wasn't the truth. he was warning her, trying to make her realize that this needed to end.

"please nate, i mean... after all this time. i've always been there for you," she pleaded, tears falling from her big brown eyes, "i've.. i've loved you."

nate looked down at the ground, his jaw clenched as he chose his words carefully. he kept his voice low, his brown eyes looked almost black in the darkness around them as he looked up at her, "cant you see i'm trying to protect you? that i do care about you enough to fucking warn you."

maddys thin brows pinched together with sadness, her face pulled into a look of desperation. "i can't stay away from you nate, we can't be apart. don't you see that?" she took a few steps forward, trying to get closer to him but nate put his large hand up, stopping her.

"i'm not someone you need in your life. cant you open your eyes and see what i've fucking done to you? you're broken. i've broken you, inside and out," he said, keeping his face cold. he needed her to hate him, to want to run away, "look in the fucking mirror for once and see the damage i've done."

nate heard a small sob leave her mouth, her slim shoulders shaking as she did so. her eyes were wide, seeming to be surprised by his words. before she could say anything else, nate spoke again, "you're a smart girl, mads. you know deep down that this-whatever we have- isn't right."

maddy blinked up at him, tears stinging her cheeks as they fell past her chin. she crossed her arms around herself, hugging herself. nate imagined how confused she must feel, how his words would feel like a punch to the gut, but he wanted them to. he wanted to hurt her beyond comprehension, to leave her in so much pain that she'd never want to face him again. he needed her to feel that way, or else she'd never leave him alone. and yet, he couldn't feel an ounce of guilt inside him. this was his plan, his life, his choice. and nate would always do what he could to get what he wanted.

"nate... please," maddy said, her voice slightly hoarse, "please don't do this. you can't do this to me."

nate shook his head, practically gritting his teeth. he was starting to feel angry, hating how pathetic maddy seemed in the moment. long ago, maddy used to be strong in his eyes. she was tough despite her small stature, always standing up for herself and never letting anyone talk down to her, even him. but now, she just looked desperate and scared, and nate needed to get her angrier if his plan would work. he swallowed before he let his deep voice out, trying to come up with something that would really get her to leave it all behind.

he suddenly walked up to her, quickly grabbing her shoulders again with force, practically shaking her as he spoke, "if you don't get out now, you're only going to suffer. i promise you. you know me, you know who i am. it's over. now stop crying and get the fuck out while you can."

maddy blinked up at him, trembling as he shook her by the shoulders, his fingers gripping her smooth skin with force. her eyes were wide with fear, her plump lips parted as she felt her heart pound in her chest. she felt small, something nate always made sure to make her feel. all the pain she'd went through with him, never being strong enough to let him go, flashed before her eyes. she thought of all the times he'd screamed at her, the way his deep voice and chiseled face would turn into someone she didn't recognize. she thought of the times he'd put her hands on her, her neck, her wrists. he'd even pushed her against his bedroom wall before, making her sink to the floor in shock and pain. still, she'd told no one, continuing her loyalty to him because she knew he wanted her to. because she loved him.

she pulled away from him, shaking her head violently as she felt anger well up inside her. he watched as she took several steps away from him, an air of fury and sadness on her features. "you can't do this to me," maddy said, still shaking her head, "you can't fucking do this. i-i trusted you, i lied for you. i tore my life apart for you!"

nate took a deep breath, throwing his head back for a moment before looking over at her, watching her chest rise and fall, the diamond necklace he'd gotten her on their second anniversary still around her neck. he felt his body fill with anger, frustration that she just wasn't getting it. before he knew it, he was walking up to her, his steps quick and swift as he angrily pulled her arm. she was crying as he dragged her over to a nearby tree before slinging her against it. maddy was light, easy for nate to throw around if he wanted to, something he'd enjoy at the start of their relationship. but now... now he had to do it to make her truly hate him. even if she didn't want to.

she let out a cry of fear as her back hit the tree with force and then nate pressed his body to hers, closing any space between them. he looked down for a moment, his breaths coming out in quick pants, clearly frustrated.

finally, his cold eyes met hers, his handsome face etched with a violent rage. he pushed her hands by her side against the rough bark of the tree, a force enough to leave bruises before he finally spoke. "you're going to listen to me. really listen and keep your ears open, okay?"

she nodded fearfully, her eyes blinking up at him as her heart sank. sadly, she recognized this look on nate all too well, having seen it plenty of times. but it still scared her, she never knew how far he would take it each time it happened.

nate clenched his jaw, his nostrils flaring as he breathed, "you're not going to speak to me. you're not going to run after me. you're not going to come up to me at school or show up to my house anymore. you're not going to call me or fucking send me a bunch of desperate texts. you're not going to go near my parents or brother. you're not going to look in my fucking direction. do you understand?"

maddy swallowed, looking into his black eyes with pure terror. nate pressed against her thin arms harder against the tree, his broad chest against hers. she couldn't run, and she could barely speak, her words lost.

"do you fucking understand?" nate asked again, his deep voice holding a cold ferocity that made her shake. she couldn't speak so she just nodded, too stunned to even scream for help.

finally he released his grip on her, his body moving away to where he had just pinned her to the tree and took a few slow steps backwards. she stayed there, feeling the pounding of her beating heart throughout her petite form. nate put his hands in the pockets of his black hoodie, turning around and beginning to walk away before he stopped in his tracks, turning his head slightly so that she could hear his final words to her.

"oh and maddy," he began, glancing at her shivering form still pressed to the tree behind her, "your new friend, the new girl? don't go near her, or i'll fucking kill you."

———

as nate made his way into ap english the next day, he was happy. after that night, maddy hadn't even sent a text to him or sought him out in the school hallways. he'd even smiled to himself that morning before getting ready for school, feeling a weight finally lifted from his shoulders as he let the cold water from the shower run over his lean muscular body.

once he'd known that maddy was out of the picture and he spotted the shy girl in class, she wasn't just the timid new girl to him anymore, she was now you in his mind. and you meant everything.

he half listened as mrs. gonazales spoke to the class and began teaching, reading some passages from the novel they had been studying. nate had an idea, a way to finally start getting closer to you, so he quietly ripped out a page from his notebook. he took his pen and wrote a simple, 'CAN WE TALK?', before folding it in half and gently dropping it on your desk beside him while mrs. gonzales had her back turned. he didn't watch you open the note or see your reaction, he just kept his eyes on the board in front of him, keeping his expression nonchalant.

despite feeling excited about the fact that he could get closer to you now, he wondered if maddy had said anything to you or kat about the night before. you were friends with them, something he still didn't understand. you were nothing like maddy's usual type of friend. kat dressed loud and despised him, cassie was desperate and a slut, and BB was a no good stoner who annoyed nate with her stupidity. you... you were so much more than them. you had potential. you had a silent grace about you that he'd noticed, an innocence that only he felt worthy of. you didn't have to be loud like the other friends of maddy's to show the world who you were, you were just you. he hoped maddy didn't say anything, hoping his threat to her was enough to keep her quiet and away from you.

once the bell rang, nate was slow grabbing his things, testing if you would come up to him after he'd given you the note. students piled out of the classroom and mrs.gonzales was no where to be seen after he heard you take a few steps towards him. he slung his back pack over one of his shoulders and saw you standing in front of him, looking nervous as usual. nate could've screamed about how adorable you looked, holding the note between your small fingers as your doe eyes looked up at him.

"you-you wanted to talk?" he heard your soft voice say. he blinked at you and nodded, giving you a soft smile in an effort to make you feel less intimidated around him.

he leaned his body against a desk for support before he spoke. "yeah, uh. listen, i know you don't know me that well but you were really nice about helping me out before when i first transferred into this class. i'll be honest, i'm not much of a reader and it's hard to stay caught up between practice and my other classes," he lied, making sure to avoid eye contact with you so he'd look nervous, "i was just, uh, wondering if maybe you'd be down to study with me sometime after school. like if maybe you'd help me out?"

he finally looked at you once he finished his whole spiel, adding on another layer by scratching the back of his neck. you honestly looked surprised by his request, your soft features looking up at him with a bit of shock before you snapped out of it.

"o-oh, yeah. um... i-i don't mind," you answered quietly, still fidgeting with the note he'd given you earlier.

nate smiled and bit his lip, biting back a smirk at your approval. "cool. i mean, you don't have to if you don't want to. i'm sure you have other classes and stuff you have to worry about. i get it," he said, making sure to look you in the eye then. he knew you were too sweet to say no, he could tell you couldn't dismiss someone who'd ask for your help. you were kind like that, and nate could definitely take advantage of that kindness in the future. you shook your head before gracing him with a polite smile.

"i-i don't mind at all," you smiled, making nate's heart feel warmer than before.

"cool," nate said, "well uh, can i have your number?" you seemed surprised by his request again, your pretty eyes going all wide as you looked at him. he liked that. in fact, he loved that look. he let out a soft chuckle, trying to put your nerves at ease, "so we can text about getting together after school sometime."

nate's heart almost melted as he watched you understand what he was asking for, the causal intentions behind it. though, he did have other intentions. he wanted to text you, wanting your number instead of having to dm you on instagram like all the other random creeps from the school probably did. nate saw it as an intimacy thing, knowing he'd feel pride in having your personal number.

he watched as you awkwardly fished your phone from your bag, noticing that your case had small pink flowers all over it. it suited you, all tiny and feminine. he got his own phone from his pocket and handed it to you causally before you handed him yours with shaky fingers. he smiled as he held your phone in his large hands, his thumb typing in his own number with ease. he liked that you didn't just tell him your number, that you'd rather exchange them so that he could be a new contact in your phone. he typed his name in before handing it back to you and you awkwardly handed him his phone back in return. "cool," he said, "i'll text you."

he wished he didn't have to walk away in that moment and just stay, enjoy your presence for a little longer. but he had to take things slow, seem causal but friendly. as nate made his way to his next class he felt on top of the world, his tall figure looking down on the students that past him in the hall and feeling like he'd just won. he knew drama with maddy might swirl around his back, that his football buddies would be asking about her or he'd hear whispers in the halls, but at that moment he didn't care. he was one step closer in having you by his side.

he didn't talk to you the rest of the day, though he watched you at your locker from the corner of his eye between classes. he liked what you were wearing, a tight white blouse that fit nice around your body with a modest denim skirt around your hips. he wished he'd told you how pretty you looked when he had talked to you after class but he couldn't yet. he'd save his compliments about how soft and beautiful you were when you were finally at ease with his presence.

after school, nate sat in his truck and waited for you exit the building. he'd already seen your fathers red car waiting at the entrance. once he saw you get in it, he couldn't help himself, pulling out of the parking lot right after it. he followed behind, making sure to keep a good distance as to not draw attention, keeping his dark eyes on the silhouette of the back of your head from the back windshield. he wondered if you had a good relationship with your father, if he were any better than his own. but nate quickly reminded himself that anyone was probably better than cal.

nate was slightly surprised when the red car didn't take the right turn to your neighborhood, instead going straight and staying on the highway. nate pressed the gas a little harder to keep up, but still let two cars get in between, wanting to make sure your father wouldn't realize he was following. it was only a few moments later when he realized where your father was taking you, his truck three cars behind as your father pulled into a shopping center. nate drove past as he saw you and your father get out in front of an older pizza place tucked into the shopping center. he drove a couple circles through the crowded parking lot when he knew you were both inside before finally pulling in a few parking spaces behind the red car.

he let his eyes scan inside the dimly lit building, noticing that a server had put you and your father right beside the tall front window in a booth. his day was only getting better, first he had your number and now he could keep a good eye on you after school and watch as you enjoyed some dinner with your father. nate leaned back in his seat some, getting comfortable as he watched you laugh and smile as you spoke to the older man sat across from you. the way you seemed comfortable, at ease with your dad, was something foreign to nate.

maybe at some point he'd been that way in his life, but now all he could remember is living in his fathers shadow. his mother, marsha, still tried to reach him sometimes, still tried to break through the cold barrier he had put up but it was futile. nate had began hating marsha long ago, when he realized how weak she was to put up with his dad. his father was a con, a fake in his eyes, a despicable man who did things behind closed doors that would make the comfortable castle they lived in fall down if anyone found out. as much as nate hated his father, he protected the man. his secrets. and sometimes he didn't know why and it would keep him up at night trying to figure it out.

nate watched you and your father eat and talk with an eager fascination. he could tell you were close to him, that you probably trusted your father and loved him. despite the normalcy of that, nate couldn't help but feel his chest tinge with jealousy. he wondered what your father might say or do once he found out you belonged to nate in the future. it didn't really matter though, nate would do anything he could to keep you. even if it meant going through your own father.

nate didn't follow the red car right away after you and your fathered had finished eating. he was still sat in his truck a while after, scrolling through the the texts on his phone. it was mostly his team's group chat, his buddies sending the usual nonsense like new nudes on the slut pages or funny memes. he was content that maddy hadn't texted him, believing that what he'd said at the park finally got through to her. he gave it some time before he drove to your house to keep watch, the evening sun beginning to set and your quiet neighborhood settling over in darkness. he saw that the upstairs light was on again in the window, knowing you were probably not in bed yet.

he bit his lip as he clicked on the contact you'd made in his phone earlier that day, his thumbs twitching to text you. he knew he should be patient, maybe let you text him first, but he figured you were too shy. that's why his heart started to race once his phone buzzed with a text from you.

it surprised nate, he wasn't expecting you to text him first. he'd figure he'd have to initiate all your interactions in the future for his plan, but that didn't stop him from being a little excited that you were thinking of him just now, at night. his dark eyes glanced up to the light in the upstairs window, knowing you were somewhere up there thinking of him enough to text him. it was more perfect than he'd imagined.

'hi, sorry to bother u but did u want to set up a time for us to study soon?'

god, even your texts were cute. he smirked as he glanced from the upstairs of your house and back to his phone, clicking on the message to show he'd read it. he let his mind wander a bit, picturing you sitting on your bed in your pajamas, with your precious heart racing as you waited for his reply. the thought alone made his pants tighten. he quickly typed back, not letting you wait for long.

'yeah. wht works best for u? i have practice tuesdays and thursdays. games on fridays evry 2 wks.'

he kept it straight to the point, letting you believe that his only intentions were for you to be a serious study partner. anyone could tell by how you acted in class that you were a good student and nate wondered if you'd tutored before. he saw that you'd read his message and his eyes darted back to the upstairs window, his stomach flipping as he imagined you surprised by his quick text back. he pictured your sweet face focused, trying to come up with the perfect, polite response. wanting to be professional but also knowing that you were nervous. he wondered what you thought of him, if you only saw him as maddy's boyfriend, as a popular jock archetype that many people saw him as. he wondered if you were compassionate enough to try and see through that, if you were interested in trying to figure the 'real' him. it made him smile deviously at the thought, like he wasn't purposely trying to appeal to you in any way he could. you were just too naive and kind to resist.

'i'm free pretty much everyday after school. i study alone anyway so it wouldn't be any different for u to be there. where would u like to meet up?'

nate felt himself grinning as he read your response. how perfect, he thought to himself, there'd be no conflicting problems in your schedule to study with him. it was almost too good to be true. almost.

Chapter 5: five 𐙚⋆°.

nate was happy that you'd agreed to meet him at the library after school. it was a quiet place, not a lot of people would be there and that meant more intimacy with you. the weekend came and went, nate spending most of it in his room, avoiding texts from his friends and working out. his sexual frustration was undeniable, he'd watched your house the last two nights, protecting you from a distance and keeping his eyes on the neighborhood. at one point he thought he'd been caught, your father walking out the door with his robe on, his eyes scanning the darkness. nate had sunk down into the seat of his truck, trying his best to blend in to the darkness around him. he finally let out a breath when he saw your father rummage around the red car he drove, before pulling out a case of beer from the backseat and going back into the dark house.

nate wondered if your dad was a drinker after that, and he wondered how much alcohol he consumed on a regular basis. nate's father, cal, was the same, usually having a glass of bourbon in his hand when he was actually home. it bothered nate to think about you possibly having a drunk as a father, even if he'd seen you both at dinner days before, how you smiled and laughed, seeming comfortable in the older man's presence. still, he wondered if you knew about your fathers drinking or if your father was an angry drunk. his body tensed as he wondered if he'd hurt you before or if he would eventually. nate would do whatever it took to protect you, and it made his stomach twist with disgust to think that your father might not be the best man to take care of you. even if he wasn't a drunk, nate would take care of you better than anyone could. he thought he was the only person worthy of the task, knowing that he would understand what it took to look out for you, to keep your shy and naive nature in tact. he would hide you from the world, never letting you struggle again after he worked his magic on you. after you started to trust that he knew best.

once monday came, nate was practically buzzing that morning. he'd woken up at four am and did a hundred push ups, the sexual tension built up. as he pushed his muscular body up and down from the floor, his arms starting to burn at fifty, he imagined what you'd wear that evening at the library. how you'd smell, how your eyes would look up at him when he got there, the way you'd probably be nervous to be alone with him again. it made his cock hard in his tight black boxers as he continued his workout, making him let out a grunt once he'd finally reach one hundred. he laid his back against the cool wooden floor of his room, his chest rising and falling as pants left his lips. he looked down, seeing his desire poking through with full force and knew he may have trouble being so close to you later that day but he didn't touch himself. instead, he ignored it, continuing his morning routine and getting ready for school.

he made his way to the kitchen, his mother pouring coffee and his father out of sight, which he was thankful for. he got his protein powder out of the cabinet, preparing to make himself a smoothie for breakfast before his mothers voice broke him from his thoughts. marsha loved him, he knew that, but nate couldn't seem to shake his distain for her. his mother was smarter than she pretended to be, no doubt having suspicions of her husbands actions and secrets, yet she remained in the marriage. nate found her weak for staying with someone like cal, her daily drinking being proof of her obvious unhappiness.

"how's school been?" she asked, wrapping her hands around the mug of coffee she made. nate sighed and grabbed a banana from the fruit bowl. his mother was never really one to ask him about his studies or life, even if she feigned interest, he knew she only did this when she had something on her mind she wanted to ask him about. nate turned to her, peeling the fruit with his slender fingers as he answered his mother.

"okay i guess," he answered, his body moving to drop the banana into the blender. he saw her nod from the corner of his eye, obviously trying to work up the courage to ask him whatever she really wanted to know. he scooted by her, walking over to the fridge to pull out some milk.

"practice been alright?" she asked, taking a sip of her coffee as she watched her tall son pour milk into the blender. nate chuckled, almost rolling his eyes at her fake interest.

"yeah, mom, yeah," he chuckled, putting the lid back on the gallon of milk in his hand before turning to face her. he gave her a look, challenging her to ask what was really on her mind. she gave him a smile of sympathy, something she did when he knew that she wasn't really interested in his life.

"i just...i haven't seen maddy in awhile," she started, sitting her mug down on the granite kitchen counter and folding her arms around her chest.

"well, you never liked her anyway," nate answered casually, scooting by her again to place the milk back in the fridge. marsha chuckled, nodding along to her sons assessment.

"that's right. she has always been well... rude."

nate turned to look at his mother, blinking his eyes and nodding at her words. it was no secret that marsha hated maddy, they'd gotten into many small spats. maddy was always quick to insult her, and marsha hated how loud and proud maddy acted. "well it's over now," nate said, opening up a jar of peanut butter and taking a spoonful into his mouth, "i, uh, broke it off with her."

marsha seemed surprised by her sons words, always assuming that nate wouldn't let their volatile relationship go. "well," she started again, walking over to her son and wrapping her hand around his shoulder. nate knew she was trying to be comforting, but he didn't feel it. it always felt performative with her. "i think that's for the best. now you can just focus on school and football, i'm sure a major weight has been lifted."

nate nodded, taking a step away from her so she'd stop touching him and adding some peanut butter to the blender, "yeah. you're right. maybe i should've listened to you all along about her."

the interaction was over now, marsha getting the answers she wanted from her son and nate letting her. he drank his protein smoothie down quickly before grabbing his keys and getting out of the cold house he and his family lived in and heading to school.

nate was a little late to school, stuck in traffic and feeling annoyed he couldn't watch you enter school that morning. he hurried to his first period algebra class, mister hendricks already beginning the lesson as nate found his seat. nate took notes as his class continued, doing his best to keep his mind focused on the lesson and not the fact he would see you next period in ap english. he was excited to see you, excited to finally get closer to you and make you befriend him. it was already a given that you seemed to like him, he had gotten you to agree to study with him, got your number and you even texted him first about study plans. it was all working out, all according to his bigger plan.

once the bell rang, nate was gathering his things and was surprised when someone tapped his shoulder. he turned to see kat hernandez, maddy's best friend, in her usual loud alternative get up. nate never really liked kat much, thought she was too invested in his relationship with maddy and too much of a fucking gossip. he had also noticed when kat had began to act and dress differently, she was a pretty girl but she now acted more confident and sure of herself, something nate didn't like girls to be. he furrowed his brows at her as she spoke, her tone sharp and her confident demeanor annoying him.

"maddy told me what you did," kat said, narrowing her brown eyes at him, her short black hair straightened and close to her face, "you're really worse than i could've imagined. just remember to watch out, okay nate?"

nate looked around to make sure no one else was in the classroom before he answered her, not wanting anyone to overhear. "how about you keep your mouth shut and keep maddy the fuck away from me? that would be kind of helpful at this point."

his tone was a cold quiet demand, making kat stiffen as he looked at her with cold eyes. "you think i'm scared of you?" kat asked him, smirking up at him after she loosened her muscles, "because i'm not, big boy. you're nothing but a fucking abusive coward. seriously, ever thought of therapy? all that toxic masculinity treating you well?"

nate took in a deep breath through his nose at her words, already getting more annoyed with the tall, curvy girl in front of him. "i don't want to have to deal with you, too. it's bad enough i have to worry about maddy's psycho shit. just stay away from me, kat. if you know what's good for you."

she scoffed and shook her head, a chuckle leaving her lips, seemingly amused by nate's threat. "maddys psycho shit? really, nate? i believe there's only one fucking psycho in that relationship."

nate didn't say anything else for a moment, grabbing his book bag roughly off his desk, almost turning the whole desk over with his strength. kat backed away a little from him, clearly a little shaken by his actions even if she pretended not to be. "talk to me when you get a mind of your own, kat," nate called to her as he left the classroom, "or don't look in my direction again."

nate hated to be in such a bad mood right before he would see you but he couldn't help it.  even after his threat to maddy that night in the park, he wondered what exactly kat had meant when she told him to 'watch out.' his stomach churned with anger and annoyance, hoping maddy wouldn't be stupid enough to be planning something against him. she would surely regret it, nate wasn't joking when he'd told her to stay away from you and himself. he would never joke about that.

as he got his novel and notebook for english class, he held his locker door over his face, not letting anyone be able to see how he looked right now. he was seething with anger, and he thought if he ran into maddy at some point that he'd have to do something even worse to keep her from fucking up his plan for you. nate pulled his face back from inside his locker and his eyes glanced down the hall to you, seeing you pull out your pink notebook. he let out a breath, the sight of you calming him and reminding him of what everything was for. who it was for.

he walked behind you into ap english, you unaware of his tall figure peering down at you as you held your books into your arms. you sat down in your usual seat in the back and he was in the one directly beside yours, sitting his stuff down and slumping his tall body into the desk. he let his dark eyes roam over you while you were blissfully unaware, watching as your small hands flipped through your notebook to the right section for class. you looked so pure and sweet today, your hair did in two braided pigtails and out of your face, a few stands dangling in the front. you were wearing something soft and feminine as always, a cream blouse and denim shorts, your thighs exposed a bit. he glanced down at your legs, shaved and smooth with ruffled socks resting over your ankles above your white sneakers.

he was already hard just by looking you over, and he couldn't help but talk to you, unable to wait until after school in the library. "hey," his deep voice said, trying his best to maintain a friendly demeanor for you.

he watched your pretty doe eyes as turned to look at him, a small warm smile on your face. "hi," you greeted him, your soft features warming up when your eyes met his. he liked that, seeing you already start to blush just from the sight of him. he pretended it was because of the fact that you thought he was good looking, not just because you were nervous.

"we're still on for after school, right?," he asked you, nate's dark eyes moving from your braided hair to your eyes again. he watched you squirm in your seat for a moment before nodding, giving him another shy smile. so, nervous, he thought, as always.

"yeah," your sweet voice said, still smiling, "at the library." nate nodded back at you and gave you a small smile, before he looked down at your shoes again and back up to your doe eyes, a small smirk replacing his smile.

"i like your socks by the way," he complimented, watching you lean back and look down, like you didn't even know what socks you were wearing. he saw your cheeks dust a rosy color and you just let out a soft laugh, looking a little bit embarrassed.

nate didn't get to talk to you during class after that, listening to mrs. gonzales teach and talk about the book the class was studying. when she mentioned that the closer they got to the end of the book, that she'd expect comprehensive essays written about the plot and what the classes thoughts were on the themes. nate thought that was a fantastic idea, meaning that not only could he study with you after school from now on, but he could also try to ask for your help in writing an essay. he knew you'd be too sweet to say no, just like he wanted. god, you were perfect for him.

after class, he talked to you one last time, keeping a warm expression on his features as he watched you gather up your things. "see you after school," he smiled, watching as you slowly looked up from your desk to him.

"see you," you replied sweetly, watching as he began to walk out of the now empty classroom.

things were fairly calm for the rest of the school day, yet nate was eager to get it over with so he could have his time with you. he was practically on the edge of his seat in biology, his last class of the day before school would finally be over and he would meet you in the library. as the final bell rang, his tall body hurried though the crowded exit of the classroom and into the busy halls, everyone preparing to get their things for the journey home. he jogged over to you, eyes of his peers on him as he did so. nate was a usual cause of attention, his height and reputation giving him no comfort in trying to fade into the background.

you seemed surprised to see him so soon after the bell, his smile and dark eyes meeting your gaze after you shut your locker. "listen, i'm going to run to my truck and then i'll meet you there," nate told you, his body leaning on the row of metal lockers as he spoke. you nodded, politely telling him that was fine and that you'd see him there in a minute.

nate put his biology textbook back in his own locker and grabbed his bag, shoving the novel for class and his notebook into it before walking out the school's entrance to lock his truck and make sure maddy wasn't around.

nate furrowed his brows as he saw a group of students surrounding his tall silver truck, whispers and voices all around it. he pushed by the crowd, his eyes darkening as he took in the sight before him. 'YOU LIED' keyed into the hood, his jaw clenching as he immediately knew it was maddy who had done it. the girl just couldn't get it, his threat holding no weight apparently and his thoughts going dark as he listened to the whispers of students surrounding him. "who the fuck saw what happened?" his deep voice yelled loudly, his muscles tense and his body turning to the small crowd around him. he watched as a couple people started to walk away, clearly afraid of his booming voice and angry demeanor. no one was answering him, which only fueled him more. "get the fuck away! go home! go! shows fucking over!" he yelled, making the crowd disperse quickly.

"i bet it was maddy," he heard some girl whisper as her and a friend walked away from him. he shut his eyes tightly, his chest heaving and his body turning around to look at the words she'd keyed into the silver hood.

carter, the strong red head from his football team jogged over to him and whistled as he saw the damage, shaking his head as he extended a hand onto nate's shoulder. nate shook him off, turning to face him. "that's fucked, man," carter said, "that bitch is insane."

nate sighed, running a hand through his dark hair before he spoke. "you have no idea," nate said, his large hand running over the hood of his truck, "listen, just get the fuck out of here. i,uh, i'm fine."

carter stiffened at nate's words before nodding, not wanting to say anything funny or smart at the moment because of nate's state of anger. "yeah, man," carter said back, his voice a little bit softer, "just text me. sorry bout your truck."

carter walked away and nate was still seething, trying to steady his breathing since he knew he would have to meet you in the quiet library very soon. maddy wasn't go to stop trying to go after him it seemed, and nate would have to come up with a plan to make her stop. fast. he thought the night in the park had actually deterred her from reaching out to him, from getting some sort of fucked up revenge or go after you. he knew maddy, he knew how angry and unhinged she could truly become when she didn't get what she wanted. but nate thought that he'd taken some of her strength that night, that he'd stripped her of all power and made her fall back into herself. clearly, he was going to have do to something serious this time and he hated himself for ever loving maddy in the first place. once upon a time, he had loved her. nate was sure of it, or he thought he had been. he knew what maddy meant by keying those two words into his truck, knew that he had lied to her. lied about loving and protecting her forever, lied when he'd told her he wanted to marry her and couldn't wait for her to have his children. but he didn't feel guilty. he had let it all go, everything between them fading away in his mind. only now, he held contempt for her. more sure than ever that he hated her.

instead of spending another minute looking at maddys words etched into his expensive truck, nate turned around and headed back into the high school, the hot sun on his back as he got ready to see you, now more determined than ever to get closer to you and be able to have you by his side.

———
he walked into east highlands quiet library, not seeing a soul, only the schools librarian at her desk, scanning books and organizing. his book bag was on one of his shoulders, his tall form walking by the many tall shelves full of books, until he finally spotted you. there was a spot in the library, several tables with about six chairs around each one for students to study or read. nate saw the back of you sitting there, your head bent slightly as if you were reading something, your bag in the floor beside your feet.

"hey," nate said quietly, having to bite back a smirk as he took the seat directly next to you. your face shot up as you saw him, a shy smile already on your face. "sorry it took me a minute, just had to take care of a few things."

you nodded, your copy of the giver and notebook directly in front of you, a small pencil case resting beside you.

when you seemed too nervous to start, nate immediately took the initiative, wanting to make you feel comfortable and safe around him, letting you know that he was interested in studying. even if it was most definitely a lie. "so, where do you wanna start?" he asked you, his expression a bit more curious as he pulled his own novel and notebook from his bed. you seemed to loosen up at that, knowing that you were confident in your ability to teach and your knowledge of the book.

"i thought we could talk about chapters five through seven since that's what we're about to go over in class. have you read them yet?" you asked softly, blinking over at nate as you awaited his answer.

he sighed, trying his best to seem a bit disappointed in himself. he wanted you to imagine that he struggled in class, even if he'd already read the whole novel in his spare time that weekend. "a little but," he started, leaning forward a bit in his seat as he spoke quietly, "haven't really had time. between practice, family issues and other classes i haven't exactly been able to focus much."

your ears seemed to perk up when you heard his excuses for not reading, and he could see the empathy take over your body. his stomach immediately stirred with his desire for you, finding it so fucking easy to make you feel for him. manipulating you a bit was going to be breeze. you nodded quickly, giving him a sympathetic smile before you spoke.

"don't worry, i get it. it's no problem," you smiled, opening up your pink notebook, the cover filled with multicolored butterflies, "that's why we're here, right? i-i don't mind to help you out anyway i can."

god, how he wanted to grab you right then and pull you into his arms, to touch your soft skin and taste your lips. so very sweet, he thought, too sweet for your own good.

Chapter 6: six 𐙚⋆°.

the two of you got started, reading silently through chapter five of the giver so you could discuss it afterwards–only, nate had already read the whole novel last weekend and actually had a sense of reading comprehension. he pretended to read to himself, holding the book up by his face with his large hands, stealing glances at you the whole time with his dark eyes. nate would notice you shift every now and then in your seat, the way your brows furrowed as you concentrated on the words in front of you. your hair looked so soft in the two braided pig-tails, your lips shining like you’d put on lipgloss. your outfit was just as cute and feminine as you, driving nate’s need for you into overdrive.

he suppressed every urge he had in that moment, ignoring the surge of desire through his stomach and the tightness of his jeans, keeping his jaw clenched and his expressions in check to be seemingly concentrated on the novel as well. he was acutely aware of how you smelled, the sweet, fruity scent—citrus, candy and something floral— invading his senses the more his thoughts wandered to anything but schoolwork.

nate reminded himself to remain calculated on how he handled this interaction, like it was a test he desperately needed to pass for your approval and comfortability around him. he knew better than to act like he did with other girls around you. a girl like you wouldn’t appreciate nate asking if you were ‘wet just looking at him.’ hell, you’d probably cry or run away if he did that. he didn’t group you into the usual slut category, the likes of cassie howard or even maddy—whom he had no respect for. they gave it up so recklessly, and usually acted like sluts or pretended to be ‘sexually liberated’ for attention. he found that whole ‘sexual freedom’ act to just be an excuse to fuck randoms for fun. he knew he had to somehow become your friend first, which was honestly harder than nate thought it would be. girls were mostly just a distraction for him and a sexual release. apart from maddy, at one point he’d tried to see her differently. nonetheless, the opposite sex didn’t belong in his actual friend group; if he even had one anymore with how focused he’d been on you the past two months.

he watched you pull the novel from your face, one of your delicate hands reaching for a sparkly, blue bookmark so you could keep your place. he bit back a smile, keeping his expression nonchalant as he slowly put his copy of the novel down too. “so,” his deep voice said, almost hoarse so he cleared his throat some as he looked over at you, “stirrings?”

you blinked at him with your big doe eyes, nodding as you seemed to let out a deep breath. you were nervous, obviously, and nate was watching as you figured out the right words to say before you said them. “let’s… let’s start with the fact that they have a ‘dream ritual’ every morning together as a family,” you said softly, giving nate an awkward smile.

“right, right,” nate replied, nodding, “in my opinion, i find it fucking awkward.” nate leaned back in his chair some after he spoke, gauging your reaction to his comment, and to his delight, you let out a quiet laugh, reaching up with one hand to hide your smile as you did so. he wished you wouldn’t, he was over the moon that he’d made you laugh.

“it really is,” you agreed, giggling some more. if making you laugh eased any anxiety or tenseness you felt in his presence, nate would make a note to himself to keep doing it. “but you g-get the real reason they have to do it, right?”

nate knew the reason, but he wouldn’t say it in some eloquent way. if he seemed like he actually understood the book, the whole study-partner thing would be pointless. “what do you mean?”

“it’s control,” you answered softly, shifting some in your seat, “the elders are always watching so they c-can gauge where someone’s subconscious is or where their emotions are through what they’re dreaming.”

nate furrowed his brows, nodding. god, you were so cute. you wouldn’t dare mention what the character, jonas, had dreamt–something even slightly sexual about the girl in the book. nate knew the parallel between being horny and ‘stirrings’ in the novel, it was obvious, but he just couldn’t resist the urge to make you at least explain it a little. “hm,” nate nodded, flicking his eyes from your fidgeting hands to the table in front of him, “and basically jonas is just maturing like any guy?”

he watched you swallow and nod awkwardly, noticing how your chest rose and fell as you sucked in a breath, the heart shaped locket around your neck moving. nate leaned forward again, putting his elbows on the table as he looked straight into your big eyes, forcing eye contact for a split second before you inevitably looked away.

you swallowed again, obviously uncomfortable with what you were about to say. so innocent. “well, yeah,” you agreed, blinking as you started to fidget with one of your pencils, “he’s feeling attraction to fiona but his parents immediately pass it off as something that needs to be suppressed.”

“handing him the pills,” nate concedes, nodding slightly as he pretends to examine the cover of the novel. he glanced up at you, forcing his face to look nonchalant, not wanting to make you think he saw it as some joke. the pink in your cheeks made his stomach clench again, and he desperately wanted to know what you were thinking. what would a virgin feel after having to talk about a sexual awakening? his thoughts quickly shifted, there was no use in fighting the filthier thoughts he had about you. was your heart racing? was there wetness forming between your soft thighs? were you fidgeting in your seat because you were trying to soothe the ache your virgin pussy was feeling? were you thinking about him? did acknowledging the characters own sexual awakening stir up your attraction to him?

“b-by suppressing those parts of people, the elders take away one of the most powerful parts of having humanity,” you say softly, interrupting nate’s thoughts. he swallows himself this time, coming back into the moment with you and wishing desperately he had jerked himself off before being in such close contact with you. instead of acting nervous, he quickly recollects himself, licking his lips before speaking.

“you’re talking about love, right?” he asks, intentionally keeping his deep voice softer before meeting your eyes. you give him an awkward smile, nodding. he lets out a sigh, shrugging his shoulders as he looks up to make sure you’re watching his performance. “yeah,” he gruffs, leaning back and looking up at ceiling for dramatic effect, “guess it is a powerful part of humanity, or whatever.”

he notices the curious look you give him, maybe even a hint of sympathy in your big doe eyes. nate hoped you were trying to figure him out, that you wanted to understand something about him or the way he felt about love. all girls were emotional like that, he knew, and if he could seem like some sad guy, maybe you wouldn’t be able to help yourself when it came to empathizing with him. of course, you’d never be able to find out everything about nate, he was just too fucking good at hiding certain parts of himself. “i don’t know,” he shrugged again, crossing his arms as he looked at you, “depends on how much of yourself you’re willing to lose in loving someone.”

his deep, brown eyes stared at you now, internally enjoying the confusion and the sort of sadness you seemed to feel from his words. he’d met you through maddy, you knew he was her boyfriend at the time, so he was hoping your little wheels were turning from his cryptic sentence. before you had the chance to respond, he didn’t let the silence linger for too long, wanting to keep you guessing on what he’d say next. this was starting to become fun for him; spending this time alone with you and watching you seem to think about his every word. “you gunna tell me if he ends up with fiona at the end or not?” he asked you with a smirk, his smile only growing wider as he watched you cover your mouth and laugh at him.

———

as the study session went on, nate was in a state of heaven while still maintaining how he reacted. he knew you were smart, but as you analyzed the next two chapters with him, he couldn’t help but enjoy the way you gracefully spoke in detail about what you’d read. it made nate want to keep asking more questions, no matter how clueless it made him seem. the stupider he acted, he thought, the more you’d give in to the empathetic side of yourself—which was exactly what he wanted. nate didn’t mind if you viewed him as some misunderstood jock with rich parents who didn’t care or him having a troubled past with relationships, he knew who he really was. he just needed to keep the truth away from you for a little while longer, after he’d already inserted himself into every crevice of your life he could.

nate felt a pang of disappointment when it was time to call it, watching you start to put your things in your bag as you finished talking about chapter seven. “and since he’s skipped during the ceremony, he thinks he’s done something wrong and o-of course that makes him anxious…”

nate nodded along as you continued, watching you with a careful eye as you put all your things away. “and thats because he gets the important role of the perceiver or.. uh, receiver? like you said that one time?” he asks you, keeping his expression interested. he liked the way you nodded, your eyes lighting up from the fact he’d remembered what you said from awhile ago, when mrs.gozales had asked you to catch him up on the novel when he first transferred into your ap english class. so easy.

“yeah,” you reply, your cheeks still pink as you avoided his eyes, “you remembered the sp-spoiler i gave you?”

nate chuckled, licking his lips as he bit back a grin, putting on the perfect act for you, “uh, yeah? i told you that you explain things better than most of the teachers here. i feel like i can actually listen to you and not just get bored.”

you seemed to not take his words lightly, laughing nervously as you glanced between him and the clock on the wall. don’t run yet, nate thought, don’t fight the fact that you like talking to me.

“then… then i’m glad i can help,” you said sweetly, biting your lip for a moment. nate wanted to grab your face then, let his fingertips rub over your flushed cheeks and his thumb pull your lip out of your teeth. but he didn’t, because he couldn’t, yet.

———

you both left the library, walking side by side into the dimly lit parking lot. it was around six, so there wasn’t anyone around. nate liked how small you looked next to him, keeping your eyes to the ground as you walked in silence beside him, your shoes tapping on the sidewalk. you kept your hands clasped behind your back, your bag swaying on your shoulder with every step. nate couldn’t help the thoughts he was having, the silence between you two inviting them in. he could grab you right now and no one would notice, pull you into his truck and take you to his house. he could pick you up, cover your mouth with his large hand if you decided to scream, and drive you far away to one of his family’s vacation homes in the valley, where you could both live in peace, without any distractions. the thought of having you to himself was driving him crazy, but instead of letting it consume him, he stopped in his tracks in front of you, making you stand still and lift your eyes to look up at him.

“your dad coming to pick you up?” he asked, his deep voice a little gruff from stifling his darker thoughts about you. he internally cringed when you heard what he said, obviously confused as to why he knew that you lived with just your dad. nate wanted to kick himself, the look in your eyes making him worried you were about to ask questions he didn’t want to answer. little did you know, he’d been watching and following you around for weeks now. you wouldn’t understand that he was only protecting you, making sure you were safe and happy. luckily, nate’s mind worked quick to try and change your confused expression, a chuckle rumbling through his tall form. “sorry, didn’t mean to sound like a creep,” he smirked, shaking his head at himself for acting purposes, “uh, maddy said you lived with just your dad. so… i kind of assumed.”

your brows unfurled at that and your cheeks heated up again under the warmth of the streetlight, a sheepish smile on your face. “oh, right,” you laughed awkwardly, like you’d just remembered that the only reason nate knew you was after he’d seen you hang out with maddy, “yeah, he should be on his w-way.”

“i’ll wait until he gets here then,” nate declared, crossing his arms over his chest and standing next you on the sidewalk. you started to shake your head, your perfect lips opening to object but nate spoke before you. “it’s not a big deal,” he chuckled, turning his head to look down at you beside him, his deep voice coming out more soft, “besides, i’d be an asshole to leave a girl alone in a parking lot at night–with no one around.”

and he believed that to be true, only for you though. he knew deep down that he’d be watching your house later that night anyway, but he wanted to stay beside you for as long as possible. nate hoped his act of chivalry made your heart race and he also hoped that no one guy had ever stood with you alone at night before. he wanted to be your first everything, even simple acts of so-called kindness like this.

you were so quiet now beside him, not any distraction like talking about the novel from class able to help you find things to say. so, nate took the lead while you both waited on your father, something he knew you’d get used to with time. “so… what made your dad decide to move to east highland?” he asked, looking at the ground as he furrowed his brow in interest. he wanted to know all the details, every piece of information he could gather from you.

“um, retirement i guess?” you replied, a slight shake in your voice. nate knew it was just your nerves, but he also wondered if there was more to the story than that, something you were hiding that he’d dig enough into to find out.

“really? hm.. what did he retire from doing?” nate asked casually, nodding his head slightly as he glanced over at you. you were already looking up at him, which he enjoyed. nate’s stomach twisted at the thought of you liking the way he looked.

“he was a private investigator for like fifteen years,” you answered, a nervous laugh escaping your lips, “after retiring, he wanted a change of scenery so he looked i-into california.”

nate hoped it was dark enough so you didn’t see him swallow from your answer or his jaw clench. fifteen years. your father had been a private investigator for fifteen years.

“most retired people want to move somewhere like california or florida,” he deep voice replied, before clearing his throat from his own nerves coming out at the thought of having to deal with the new information about your father, “something about it being… uh, warmer?”

nate hadn’t expected that your father would have been an investigator and it was no question that nate couldn’t have your dad digging into the secrets of his past, or even nate’s own fathers. nate could’ve decided to let his whole plan with you go in light of the news, but he just couldn’t. he’d already made up his mind. he would go through your own father if it meant having you to himself. he just had to be even smarter about it.

Notes:

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surpriiiise!! here’s an update since i suddenly got over my writers block. and don’t think i haven’t seen y’all’s asks about how much you like my silly little nate jacob’s fic !! it means so much that you guys were actually asking for an update. sorry it took so fucking long (ノ_＜) i was struggling w things happening IRL but my brain is back to having inspo. i have sooooo many ideas about this fic, and it’s my first actual long length work of writing. i’m planning to make it the length of an actual novel so expect many many many many more chapters and *hopefully* faster updates now. thanks for reading !! ( ^ω^ )