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(It Keeps On) Keeps on Breathing

Summary:

through love, through pain, through shame—
In which there’s a little bit more of a gap in between the fall of the Celestial Cannon and the official When Angels Fall epilogue. In this gap, there’s not much else to do but pick up the pieces.

OR

There’s no way everyone was fit and ready to leave Starlight after a week! So I sent them back to the hospital.

Notes:

hi gang! so the aphmau brainworms are back LOL
title taken from Mother Falcon’s song “Dirty Summer!” i love mother falcon. mother falcon forever

Chapter 1: Aphmau

Notes:

this is my third attempt to add chapter notes it’s not working HELLPPPPPP
i would tell y’all more but ao3 literally keeps crashing everytime i try to update it. they hate to see a yapper like me coming

Chapter Text

“Mija? Mija?” There was a faint pressure somewhere on the vague idea of her body. “Mija, wake up!”

“Ma’am, please don’t overwhelm her, we need to—”

“Aphmau?”

“…Mom?” She croaked, cracking her eyes open. Instantly, her vision was flooded with bright light, and she tried to raise her hands to shade herself a little. Unfortunately, they seemed to be out of her control at the moment. She narrowed her eyes at the shapes in the light, as they came into focus into a crowd of masked figures, all dressed in scrubs except for one.

MIJA!” she shouted, holding both of her hands up in a vice grip. “You wouldn’t belive how happy I am to see you awake again, my little girl, how are you feeling?”

Aphmau groaned, leaning back. “‘M tired, mostly.” she mumbled.

Her brows furrowed, and she took Aphmau’s hands, still in her grasp, and lifted them towards her head, bowing it like she was in prayer. 

(And her mom’s hair was dark instead of its usual icy gray.)

(And his mom’s eyes were amber instead of a bubbly blue-green.)

(And his mom’s fingers were too short and stubby, instead of the long gentle ones that would run through his hair and comfort him when he had red-tinged nightmares.)

She blinked. Aphmau must’ve been ice-cold, because her mother’s forehead against the tips of her fingers was so, so warm. “Mom,” she croaked, feeling like she was talking through a thick wad of cotton in her throat.

“Shh, shh,” Sylvanna said, brushing her dark hair out of her face. “Save your strength. I don’t want you running off into anymore trouble, do you—”

There was a commotion in the hall, and then the door burst open. A line of Guardian Forces soldiers started to file in, followed by a severe-looking woman with dark hair pulled back into a tight ponytail that had to be hurting her scalp. 

Aphmau tensed, clenching her sheets in her fists. Her mom had turned too, her mouth pulled into a tight frown.

“Miss Aphmau,” The lady said, staring straight through her with startling yellow eyes. “My name is Tilde. I’m doing an investigation on the,” she paused, scowling at her clipboard, “what the Guardian Forces were exactly doing on Starlight Wonderland, and how exactly a man named Micheal ties into all of this.” She tilted her head and raised her eyebrows, like she was waiting for Aphmau to impress her. “I hear you have some key information, and are now fully awake. Do you have time now for an interview?”

To her side, Sylvanna had started to bristle. “Aphmau just woke up for the first time after a traumatic event. Do you have no decency to even wait a—”

“No,” Tilde quickly jotted something down on her clipboard. “Time is of the essence. The sooner my investigation is underway, the sooner we can find the faults in our system and course correct.” She gave Aphmau a severe look, one that made her squirm. “Do you have time now for an interview?” She repeated, her tone even.

Aphmau sighed, and she felt a dull ache at the center of her forehead, a tight ball of stress beginning to form. She forced herself to intense her shoulders. “Mamá, I can do it. I’ll talk to her.”

“Oh, Aphmau,” Sylvanna turned away from scowling at the agent, and Aphmau was hit with the full force of her worry. “Are you sure? Don’t let her bully you, you need to rest so you can build your strength up again. Please.”

“I’ll be okay. I’m a big girl now.”

Her face crumpled miserably. Aphmau felt the need to turn her face away, to give her some room. “Oh, mija,” her mom leaned over and brushed her bangs back from her face, not meeting her eyes. “My strong girl. I’ll be back soon, okay?” 

“Thank you, Mamá,” Aphmau replied softly, trying to commit her gentle touch to memory. She missed her mom. She missed her a lot. Nothing really compared.

Sylvanna stood, straight as a board, clenching her fists to her sides. She gave Aphmau a brave smile, then exchanged it for a scowl the second she passed Tilde a couple feet away from the door.

Tilde watched her mom leave, stony-faced. The second she was out the door, the woman turned to Aphmau, an intense look in her eyes. “Now,” she clicked her pen against her clipboard. “Tell me everything.”