The new norm

by Quanto

Summary:

Just a few tid bits going over izuku and mei's new routine now that they live in an actual building and have adult figures in their lives that aren't gone or suck!!

Also U.A's bank balance is going towards a whole lot more coffee

Chapter 1: Start of the new norm

Izuku gently wakes up and looks over to realise mei is cuddling up next to him, when the two moved into the dorms they both insisted on sharing a bedroom, they've slept together for ages now that they don't think they even could sleep alone if the wanted to, they did also get a talk from midnight but after 3 minutes izuku was in tears and mei wanted to drink bleach ... yyeeeaaahhhh let's just say the two flat out do NOT want the sex Ed talk, like they'd even do any of that stuff bleeegggg.

 

Izuku gently got himself out of bed carful not to disturb mei, granted she could sleep through gun fire yet the moment somebody mentions something she likes she for some reason shoots up wide awake like she didn't just sleep for 8 hours straight but that's besides the point, izuku went over to his wardrobe and carfuly took his pajamas off and putting on some sweatpants and a T-shirt he felt pretty alright today so baggy clothes it was! And yeah he's aware you don't really have to be careful with pajamas but these are izukus first set in actual years so give him a break!

 

thud

 

Oh meis off the bed, he turned around to see mei standing up and rubbing her head gently as she turns to look at him " I just fall ?? " she asked as she stood up

" yeah just now " he said not really all that bothered

" oh dang it! And that's something I'm trying to stop doing!!! " she wined as she flapped her hands in annoyance before going to get changed, she keeps her clothes in her dorm room but since she sleeps in izukus it's more like a workshop/layout/wardrobe not that anybody complaining mind you.

After a few seconds mei came back in wearing a baggy shirt and slack pants aswell as boots, midnight once tried to get her to Wear a dress but mei quite literally ripped it off, took it outside and burnt it with a flame thrower whilst loudly proclaiming " PURGE THIS HERESY FOUL XENO!!!!!!! " yyeeaahhh don't ever give mei a dress she will destroy it midnight learnt that the hard way.

 

_________________

 

The two gremlins then left their room and headed down to the common area where they saw snipe, ectoplasm, glad and mic for some reason all playing uno

" uno " snipe said smugly as he out down a plus two to which ecto annoyingly picked up two cards

" uuummm I would ask to join but last time me and izu played ... we ended up burning the deck " mei said non chlauntly as the two went to grab their breakfast, the ones playing looked over to the girl with questioning looks whilst mic tried to hold back a chuckle

" uuummm wh what .. ??? " midnight asked worriedly as she started to sweat

" yeah we kind of outlawed either of us playing uno at all because last time we played it went on for 5 hours and the rules kept getting more and more random, so we agreed to a draw and just so we couldn't make that mistake again we burnt the deck on a pire covered in gas " izuku said much to some of the teachers slight shock, after living with the two for a month now they've gotten use to the twos behaviours especially after the dress incident, they still don't know where mei git that flamethrower from. 

" where's aizawa ?? " izuku asked as he looked around not finding the hobo man anywhere

" there he is!! " mei said enthusiastic as izuku looked over to where she was pointing and spotted his iconic bright yellow sleeping bag

'I really gotta get me one of those' he thought to himself as he made himself some breakfast, so what he likes western food in the morning not his fault chocolate wheatabix are delicious as fuck!

" observant as ever chaotic child " the man behind the bag said as he sat up and got out of the sleeping bag prepping himself to make some coffee

Mei realising what he's about to do turns to face izuku giving him the most evil smirk he thinks he's ever seen her do. He shakes his head NO rapidly as mei just turns to look over at aizawa

" hhheeeyyy aizawa??? Wanna know something about coffee ??? " she said a Cheshire smirk on he face

" mmm sure why not?? " he says, unless it's coffee or cats he doesn't really pay attention to what others say, well unless it's his family

" ... coffee is just bean soup ... " she says with the straightest face imaginable as silence quickly overtakes them all, the staff looking over at mei in utter horrors ame with izuku all the while aizawa seemingly freezes for what feels like hours before he slowly turns to face mei with the most murderous glare imaginable

"what.did.you.just.say.?.?.?."

" they hated mei for she spoke the truth " she said in full honesty before she booked it followd quickly by a chasing aizawa

" GET BACK HERE YOU HEATHEN!!!!!! " he shouted as mei cackled madly as she ran

Everybody was silent for a solid 30 seconds before mic burst out laughing along with midnight, izuku just sighed in annoyance knowing he's going to have to untie aizawa from whatever trap mei has set up for him this time

All the while nezu sat in the corner watching it all on the outside he was calm but internally he was absolutely howling like the mad demon he is

Chapter 2: The rise of the stabby legion

Summary:

" ehehehehe "

" uummm izuku mei just ran off with all out roomba-"

" NOPE!! EVERYBODY RUN!!!!! "

Mei stared down at the small circular robot at feet watching as it drove itself into the wall repeatedly only for it's sensors to tell it to course correct, however said line of code was messing up causing it to repeat its current action.

 

Mei having enough of watching a baby hurt itself picked up the small robot and hugged it close to her saying " don't worry baby mama's got you, and when ik done with you you'll be the best baby ever!!! Ahahahahah!!!! "

At that she ran off upstairs leaving behind some very confused hero's

 

" did she just steal one of the roombas ?? " snipe asked to nobody in particular 

" I'm more worried about the fact she hugged it like an infant then ran of with her usual manic energy " mic said slightly dumbstruck.

 

After that izuku walked in from the kitchen drinking a cup of hot chocolate " what are you lot doing this time ?? " he asked the pros begrudgingly 

" uummm mei just ran off after picking up a roomba and-- " midnight didn't get to finish as izuku spat out his drink and practically shouted

" SHE WHAT!?!?!?! "

It was then everybody in the room remembered who just took a roomba, and where said person took the roomba to

 

___________

 

" GO FORTH MY CHILD!!!! MAKE THOSE WHO DIDNT BELIEVE IN YOU RUE THE DAY!!!!! " mei cackled with murderous glee as her new and improved roomba drove ahead of her now equipped with the following

A canister of tier gas that can be sprayed at any moment

Built in guns that shoot rubber bullets

A built in 200 volt laser

And a knife fixed to its top side

Oh yeah also a completely self aware AI aswell cause mei be like that 

 

" ... mei ... just just why ?? " izuku asked as he and mei watched the rolmba destroy an army of 1 pointer robots in one of the fake city's

" because science isn't about why izu, it's about why NOT!?!?! WHY SHOULD SCIENCE BE SAFE!?!? " mei said in utter glee as she watched her newest and bestest baby continue to destroy all in its wake

" ... I should have never EVER allowed you to learn of the portal franchise " izuku said in disbelief 

Suddenly the door behind then opened and the little demon robot rolled in happily beeping to mei

" aaww who's a good boy rover? You are! Oh yes you are! " mei said to her baby as she knelt down and gently petted it's top side like it was a dog.

Izuku to knelt down and gently held a hand out which luckily rover spotted and rolled up to izuku, allowing the green bean to pet it

" ... alright fine he can stay " izuku said after a moment to which mei cheered " but if anything goes wrong YOUR cleaning up got it?! "

" yes izu " izuku said degectivly before izuku leaned over and gave her a light kiss on the cheek, causing both gremlins to blush heavily, ... rover silently laughed to himself at his parents antics

Notes:

Was hit by a really random idea so now mei and izuku have a pet/child roomba

So now you all have to live with the knowledge that rover now exists mwuahahaha ( also yes the name is a reference of you get it, I dunno go get yourself a cookie or something )

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 2 of UA's adorable autistic gremlins