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Guards dragged me to a different cell and they threw me in with such force that I felt like I was thrown out of my body.
“Tell us who TB is and maybe we’ll spare you this time,” the guards said, and I looked at them with fear in my eyes. They found the note.
“I’m not telling you,” I said, and I was kicked in the stomach. I wasn’t going to give in though.
“Should we waterboard it out of him?” one of the guards asked the other, and I paused.
“No, he’s resisted that before.”
I knew that they would make it slow and painful.
I got another kick to the stomach before I was pulled up by my hair. I still kept my thoughts silent.
“If your Bandito ‘friends’ actually cared they would have come for you already, face it Clancy, they aren’t coming back,” the one grabbing my hair said, and that’s when my thoughts spiraled.
They would’ve come for me by now. Torch would’ve come for me by now.
My hair was let go and I sat there, trying my hardest to not cry. I couldn’t cry.
“That got to him,” one of the guards said, and the other one smirked.
“TB and the Banditos would’ve come for you by now, and if TB really loved you then you wouldn’t even be here.” I was pulled onto my feet by my hair and I barely registered that a guard broke my nose until I felt the bleeding. I heard the cell door shut and I was alone again.
Torch didn’t love me, and he possibly never did. Maybe all those nights we spent together were just acting. The nights that were just between us, the nights where we had to be quiet.
He always said he loved me, but if he loved me I wouldn’t be stuck here. Maybe all those nights were fake, even though I would never forget the way his callused hands felt on my skin. He knows my body and mind like the back of his hand, gentle touches and rough kisses was all he knew when it came to me.
No, he loves me, he’s shown me countless times that he does. He’s made me flower crowns and given me yellow marigolds, but why hasn’t he tried to rescue me yet?
I let myself cry for the first time in a while.
Torchbearer didn’t love me, and it made my heart wilt like flowers that had been forgotten about in a vase hidden away from the sun. He didn’t love me.
He probably never did.