but i'm a cowboy!

by maladaptivewriting, something_about_mothman

Summary:

Working on a dude ranch in Wyoming had its perks. James spent time riding horses, enjoying included room and board, and getting paid handsomely to make silly city folks' day by showing them a real cowboy. It was all going exactly as James expected it until a last-minute fall booking sent his world into a tailspin.

OR

James works at a dude ranch and Regulus comes for Barty’s bachelor party weekend. What could possibly happen in a tent all alone?

Notes:

the title is reference to the movie 'but i'm a cheerleader!" which if you haven't seen, you should watch. it doesn't have anything to do with this fic, i just thought it was a fun title

this was meant to be finished months ago but we're just getting around it now so i hope you all enjoy.

special thanks to our beta colourful_desert who came through even though it took literally months for us to finish this first chapter.

Chapter 1

“I want you to be my best man,” Barty said confidently. 

Regulus rolled his eyes. “I already agreed to this,” Regulus drawled. “Why are you asking me again?”

“There’s more.” Barty spoke like he couldn’t hear Regulus. He was staring out of the front window of Regulus’s row house, his hands behind his back. He looked like his father when he stood like that, like a forgery of formality. It made Regulus uncomfortable. 

“If you say so,” Regulus mumbled. 

“I need you to throw a bachelor party for me.”

“I thought you said you didn’t want one?” 

“I didn’t!” Barty spun around as he said it, throwing his arms up above his head. “But now Pandora is throwing Evan one and I can’t let them get ahead of me.”

“Ahead of you – wait, Pandora is Evan’s best man?” 

“Of course,” Barty said incredulously. “Who else did you think he would ask?”

“Typically people ask men to be their best man,” Regulus said. 

“Don’t be sexist, Reg.”

“Also, I thought Pandora hated Evan.”

“She does,” Barty said with a solemn nod. “Did you know she threatened to kill him just last week? She said she was going to send him Anthrax in the mail.”

“Where is she expecting to get Anthrax?”

“It’s Pandora.”

“Right,” Regulus conceded. “So why has she agreed to be his best man?”

“Fuck if I know,” Barty said. “Maybe she’s planning to kill him during the party.”

“It’s very possible.”

“Do you think I should be worried?” 

“About Pandora killing Evan? Definitely.”

“About his bachelor party,” Barty corrected with a frown. 

“No,” Regulus said. “Evan isn’t going to do anything to hurt you. We both know that.”

“Right, right.” Barty looked troubled for a moment. “So anyway, the bachelor party. Will you throw me one?”

“I guess,” Regulus said with a shrug. “What do you want to do?”

“I’m pretty sure you’re the one that’s supposed to decide,” Barty said. 

“Who’s going to Evan’s? You guys have a lot of overlapping friends.”

“Basically everyone,” Barty said. “We’ll have to find other people to come to mine.”

Regulus sighed. “Where am I supposed to find these people?”

“You could hire someone,” Barty suggested. 

“I’m not going to hire friends to celebrate your revenge wedding.”

“I wish you would stop calling it that,” Barty muttered. 

“I’ll figure something out,” Regulus said thoughtfully, ignoring Barty’s words completely. 

“We’re not getting married as revenge against my father.”

“Maybe we’ll go somewhere,” Regulus said to himself. “I’m sure Evan will have his in New York. D.C. isn’t exactly a good place for a night out.”

“It’s not revenge, I really love him.”

“We could go to Las Vegas, I guess, but that’s a bit cliche.”

“Regulus, it’s not revenge.” 

Regulus finally drew his attention back to Barty’s unhappy face. “Are you or are you not planning a massive gay wedding just to spite your Republican father?” 

“Well, yes, a massive part of it is to upset my father.”

“Then it’s a revenge wedding.”

“But I would want to marry Evan even if it wouldn’t piss off my dad.”

“Okay, then have a small wedding. Just friends. That’s what Evan wanted, isn’t it?” 

“Ugh, I hate when you take his side.”

“He’s more reasonable than you.”

“I shouldn’t have ever introduced you two,” Barty huffed. 

Regulus shrugged. “That’s not my problem.” He stood up, stretching slightly. He’d been sitting on the couch for hours before Barty had shown up. He was working on his newest novel, though it wasn’t going very well. The impatient email from his editor was still sitting unanswered on his phone. 

“Do you need to get back to work?” Barty asked. He looked stressed, a line between his eyebrows and his shoulders held tightly up by his ears. Regulus knew this wedding business was stressing Barty out; he’d encouraged him to let it go many times, but Barty always refused no matter how much suffering it caused him. 

“No,” Regulus said, shutting his laptop. He hadn’t written a word in hours, he’d just been staring at the screen, unfocused. “Let’s go get a drink.” 

𐚁

A few hours later, Regulus ran in the front door of his house, shaking off the rain that had started pouring shortly after they entered a dark, basement bar. It wasn’t a very nice place, but the press never went there and Barty was unlikely to be recognized by people looking to schmooze him. Regulus did not envy him. They’d parted ways outside the bar after Regulus stopped Barty from ordering a fifth round of Picklebacks–for the love of God, they weren’t twenty anymore. Barty called a cab to take him back to his Navy Yard apartment and Regulus opted to shuffle through the rain back to his house. 

He didn’t live far, only half a mile or so from the bar, but it was raining harder than he expected so he was drenched to the bone by the time he shoved open his front door. He shed his sopping wet clothes on the way to his shower, praying the scalding hot water would warm him. 

Once he was out of the shower, he wrapped himself in a fluffy robe that his agent, Lily, had purchased for him as a gift. He was pretty sure it was meant to be a joke, but he’d loved it too much not to use it. It was bright pink with a hood decorated with a set of pink bunny ears. He made a pot of coffee and settled back on the couch, eyeing his closed laptop resentfully. It was getting late, but he knew he should probably try and get a few more words down. 

After five minutes passed with him refusing to make any moves to grab his computer, he gave up. He would have to start fresh in the morning. 

Instead, he pulled out his phone and started to scroll aimlessly through his contacts. Barty’s wedding was in three weeks, which didn’t leave much time to plan a bachelor party, and there was only one weekend in that time that Regulus didn’t already have plans for. It gave him even less time to find people to go with them. He frowned, faced with his lack of real life friends. He barely spoke to anyone that he’d gone to school with, and the few friends he did have were all likely going to be with Evan already. 

He mentally added and removed five people from the list of potential guests. They’d all likely be free, but they all shared that same networking smile that gave him the heebie-jeebies. Even at trashy house parties, he could see them grinning like they were at a job interview. It was one the downsides of living in D.C., everyone was trying to further their careers here. 

He passed Peter’s name with a quick swipe of his thumb then paused. Peter wasn’t a bad guy, Regulus had met him in undergrad when Peter was still gunning for a policy job. They’d stopped talking as much when he’d started working as a staff assistant on the Hill, but they’d reconnected when Peter abruptly quit and decided to work as a ghost tour guide down in Georgetown. 

He opened their messages, they hadn’t texted in a few days. 

Regulus: Hey, are you free next weekend? 

Peter: I can be 

Peter: What’s up? 

Regulus: I need people for Barty’s bachelor party 

Peter: Barty Crouch? 

Regulus: Yeah

Peter: He’s getting married?? 

Regulus: Are you free or not?

Peter: What kind of bachelor party? 

That was a good question. Regulus should probably plan the actual party before inviting people. Of course Barty would give him the impossible task of planning a party with such little notice. Still, Regulus was determined to do a good job. He at least was going to pick something original. He quickly typed ‘Bachelor Party Ideas’ into Google. He scrolled through a few articles, but nothing stood out to him. 

With a small laugh under his breath, he typed in ‘Bachelorette Party Ideas.’ He considered and disregarded a few of the suggestions – wine tasting, a Yoga retreat, karaoke – before he landed on horseback riding. Barty was terrified of horses. Terrified . He’d been forced to ride one when he was a child once and hadn’t been able to move on since. 

Regulus couldn’t help but picture his face when he realized they were headed to some ranch where he would be forced to come face to face with his biggest fear. Regulus laughed imagining telling Evan about it. Barty was right, he probably shouldn’t have introduced the two of them. 

Regulus opened his messages again. 

Regulus: Horseback riding 

Peter: Where? 

Leave it to Peter to not even question that idea, Regulus thought. Regulus shook his head and searched up horseback riding. He didn’t want to go anywhere too closeby. Though his plan was to torture Barty, he wanted to pick a place where Barty might have some fun. When he found Deerwolf Ranch in Jackson Hole, a luxury horse riding resort, Regulus knew it was the right choice. 

Regulus: Jackson, Wyoming 

Regulus: I’m paying

Peter: That’s all you had to say 

Regulus shook his head with a low laugh. He should have known. Tickets to Jackson likely wouldn't be cheap, but he had more money than he knew what to do with since his parents died, so he didn’t mind covering the bill. 

He went back to searching through his contacts without finding a single other person that might be a good candidate for his plan. He sighed through his teeth then started at the top of the list, this time with lower standards. 

By the time he made it to the S names, he was getting desperate. It was only that desperation that led him to opening his messages with his brother, Sirius. 

They weren’t exactly on the best of terms, but since their parents died a few years prior they’d both been trying to reconnect. Sirius worked as a tattoo artist, so he might be booked up for the weekend. But then again, he might be able to take some time off easier than other people. Regulus supposed he had no options but to ask. 

Regulus: Are you free next weekend?

Sirius read the message immediately, a typing bubble appeared then disappeared then reappeared. Regulus gritted his teeth. 

Sirius: why?

Regulus : I need a favor

Sirius: are you in trouble? 

Regulus: No

Regulus: I’m throwing a bachelor party for Barty

Sirius: the senator’s kid?

Regulus: Yes 

The typing bubble appeared again. It stayed for an inordinately long time. So long that Regulus nearly told him to forget it. 

Sirius: what kind of party?

Regulus: Horseback riding in Jackson Hole 

Sirius sent three laughing emojis. 

Regulus: Are you free or not?

Sirius: i’m definitely free 

Regulus blew out a sigh. He was trying, that was all that was asked of him when he and Sirius reconnected. Sirius still had such a talent for getting under his skin, though. 

He was ready to call it quits, four people was enough for a bachelor party, right? But then he scrolled past Lily’s name again. They’d met briefly as teenagers then reconnected in their twenties. She’d been the first one to encourage Regulus to publish his book, and when she took a job as an agent, she’d all but forced him to finish his first draft. He wasn’t sure he ever would have if it wasn’t for her. He dialed her number quickly, Lily always preferred FaceTimes over texts. 

When he asked her to join on the bachelor party, she squealed with delight. Lily didn’t like Barty, she thought he was a dick, but she loved Sirius and Regulus and their attendance was more than enough to convince her. 

That night, he quickly booked the plane tickets for himself, Barty, Sirius, Lily, and Peter, then paid the ridiculous resort fee for the weekend. He was lucky they still had availability, but he was out over fifteen grand for the whole thing. It was well after two in the morning by the time he was done planning everything. 

He glanced at his laptop before getting up to head to bed. Who knew, maybe this trip would give him some new inspiration for his book. 

𐚁

Rays of light crested over the distant mountain range, peaking into the room where James was just starting to wake. He knew he was running late when the sun had the chance to rouse him from his slumber. After stretching his arms, he slipped out of the bed and let out a soft gasp as his feet hit the cold floor.

James thought again about forcing himself to wear socks to sleep, but something about that didn’t sit right with him. 

He brushed his teeth, tousled his hair into something resembling tamed, and dressed in all of five minutes. Rushing out his bedroom door, James practically ran down Remus.

“Fuck, James! Watch yourself.” Remus huffed, scowling at James, who gave a sheepish grin. “Just because you’re running late doesn’t mean you need to kill me first thing in the morning.”

“I’m not running late if you aren’t even outside.” James shot back, grinning. Remus rolled his eyes as they both entered the kitchen, the scent of toast and bacon making James’s stomach rumble.

The best part of working on the ranch was the chef prepared meals. Well, James thought, that and getting paid a ridiculous amount to do the exact things he liked to do. He sat himself down at the table, heaping eggs, bacon and toast onto a plate before drenching everything in hot sauce. 

“Leave some for everyone else.” Frank scolded laughingly, even as the man put more plates of food directly in front of James, as if to taunt him. 

“Everyone else is probably already out. We’re late,” James replied, half chewed food still in his mouth. 

“Hardly. You two are never late. You know your day doesn’t start before the sun comes up. I swear you guys work yourself too hard.”

Frank moved back to the stove, humming as he cracked a few more eggs into a well-used silver bowl. He was right, but James had always been told on his family farm back in Texas that work started before the sun. It was hard to unlearn something that had been drilled into him his entire childhood. He still felt guilty opening his eyes to find sunlight shining through his window. He hated the way his stomach would drop with a moment’s panic. 

He’d never really questioned the early starts before. It was so ingrained in him that even the countless reminders from the owners and his boss, Alice, that he didn’t need to rush couldn’t stop him from feeling late everyday. 

The Texas heat was likely to blame, at least partially, for the early mornings back at home on the farm. During the summer months, it was nearly impossible for them to get work done after ten, the blazing sun was too dangerous once it reached a certain height in the sky. Wyoming wasn’t like that. It got hot, sure, but it was nothing compared to where he used to live. Most days he could comfortably do chores well into the afternoon. 

“I wake up with the horses. I don’t know why you’re up so early,” Remus said, between mouthfuls of food. 

James had a problem with speaking with his mouthful–even with constant reminders from Alice, who found it horrifyingly disgusting, James often forgot to chew his food before speaking. Remus was better raised, he always took a sip of coffee before he started talking. James rolled his eyes, there was no reason to act so demure at the breakfast table. 

“Someone has to keep you company, or you’ll become one of those people who only talks to animals,” James said with a sideways grin. Neither of them mentioned the fact that Remus was already one of those people, he even gave each of the horses their own unique voices. 

“How could that be possible when I go on every trail ride?” Remus pointed his fork at James accusingly. 

“And yet, you refuse to speak with any of the guests beyond a few words.” James gave a triumphant smirk, but Remus only scoffed.

“Horses are more intelligent than most of our guests.” 

Both of them snickered, even Frank let out a small huff of laughter. If there was one thing they could all agree on, it was that the rich yuppies that came to the ranch were the worst. Most of them just wanted to spend time in the expensive cabins, only leaving to take a few pictures vaguely near a horse for their social media. Some of them wanted a more “authentic experience,” but James had yet to discover what that meant. He didn’t think horseback riding at a resort and spa was very authentic. 

“Are you two making fun of the guests again?” Alice asked as she walked inside. Everyone in the kitchen instantly shot to attention. James had met formidable women before, his mom being one, but Alice was a whole different breed. 

She was the daughter of an oil tycoon who’d left her a hefty sum when he’d died. She was only ten when it happened and she’d had her entire life lined up for her by her mother– private prep school, Ivy League college, law school, marry rich and never use her J.D. a day in her life– but Alice had met Frank, a line cook at a restaurant near her prep school, when she was sixteen and never looked back. She’d taken the job as manager of the ranch on a whim, dragging Frank along with her. 

She ran a tight ship, but she paid extremely well and, compared to actual farm work, the resort was a breeze. 

“Well?” Alice asked, placing a stern hand on her hip. 

A chorus of no’s echoed, and all the men eagerly found some tasks to complete. James and Remus dumped their plates, and brought them to the sink to rinse before loading them in the dishwasher. Frank made up Alice’s plate, setting it before her with a kiss on her head. She rolled her eyes at their antics.

“I don’t care what you guys do as long as it’s not in front of the guests.” Alice paused, taking a sip of coffee, “Which by the way, we had a last-minute booking for the weekend.” She began eating, as if she hadn’t just dropped a bomb on them. 

“What?!” The protest came from Marlene, who had finally walked in, last as always. 

Marlene was the final member of the permanent ranch team. James, Alice, and Marlene did the general ranch upkeep, which included fixing fences and wrangling cattle. The cattle were mostly for show, but that didn’t mean they still didn’t need to be kept from danger. 

Remus was their resident horse expert. He ensured their care, even going on the overnight trail rides in case any medical attention was needed. 

That left Frank, who James believed was the most important member of the ranch. What was life without good food? He was amazing, could probably work in any restaurant in the world, but he loved the slow life at the resort, and since he and Alice married, they hadn’t spent more than 48 hours apart. 

There were other employees that came when they had guests, but many of them left during the less busy months. 

During the spring and summer, they would have bookings almost every single day, but as the air got colder, business slowed. During the fall and winter months, there were usually only a few stray bookings. Mostly people looking for a romantic holiday. Why they thought trudging through the snow was sexy, James didn’t know. Luckily right now, it was only the mild start to fall, the leaves changing colors and the air becoming crisp. The nights however were already getting brutal with the wind chill off the mountains. None of them had been expecting another booking until December when the Christmas crowd came in. 

“Is anyone else coming in to help us?” James asked. 

“Nope,” Alice said. “I’ve already sent most of the staff home for the next month. It’s just us and Mary’s team. It looks like a small group though, we should be able to handle it.” 

James tried not to roll his eyes. Managing the animals and all the resort upkeep while also dealing with guests made for taxing work. When he noticed Remus frowning, though, he worked to refresh his good nature. It wouldn’t do for them both to sulk. They liked to take turns, and James’s had been last weekend when he slipped in a pile of cow manure. 

“Come on, Doc,” James said, slapping Remus’s shoulder as they walked toward the backdoor. “Let’s have another great work day.”

“Firstly, not a doctor,” Remus grumbled. 

“But you will be eventually, just trying to get you used to it. You’re more skittish than a doe.”

“Secondly,” Remus said, “I’m not sure why you’re so chipper, since you have to start getting ready for the guests.” They made their way to the path that led to the rest of the ranch, the door behind them holding open for a few long seconds before slowly starting to close with a creaking sound that grated on James’s ear. He would have to fix that at some point today. 

“Ugh, don’t remind me. Do you think it’s some city couple looking to get freaky in a cabin? I swear they think this is a Hallmark movie.”

“To them it might as well be, and you are here to facilitate the magic.” Remus grinned, quoting what the owner had said when James was first hired. Remus spun to head toward the barn, leaving James standing near the cow pasture.

“I’m not a yuppy babysitter. I'm a cowboy!” James shouted at Remus’s retreating back.

“You bet you are, partner.” Marlene clapped him on his back, the words muffled through a bite of toast. James glared at her, brushing her hand off.

“I know you’re making fun of me, which means you get pasture cleaning duty,” James said snootily. 

“Hey, you don’t get to deal out the chores. Alice, James is being sensitive!”

“Oh my god, you guys are children. “Alice sighed, exhausted before the day had even started. “I already drew up the chores, so here.” She handed each of them their assignments and turned away, mumbling something about needing a vacation.

James scanned the page for his name. He’d gotten the task of checking on the cows, one of his favorites. He loved spending time with the cows, they were spoiled rotten here, a happy bunch of animals, and they always looked so pleased to see him. Far more pleased than Remus was when James waltzed into the barn to bother him. Remus threw a horseshoe at his head, which James thought was very rude, but it was his own fault for forgetting it was farrier day. 

He quickly selected his favorite horse, Bandit, a chestnut colored American Quarter Horse, who luckily had already been re-shoed, and set off into the cow pasture.

He liked the quiet moments of riding, listening to the sounds around him, the soft lulling of the cows as they called to each other. It was an easy day of checking the herd, and giving all the cows that would let him a little scratch.

“Y'all have it lucky. You just hangout. Get premium food and don’t have to worry about being dinner.” The cow mooed, which James took as agreement that yes, they had it easy. He hummed to them for a bit, cows loved music, and James loved to put on a show. 

After ensuring the herd was safe and nothing was amiss, he went to help Marlene, who was busy cleaning and refilling the food and water bins. Even with a short break for lunch, it seemed no time at all before all the immediate tasks were completed.

Once done with his own work, James went to find Remus at the barn. In typical Remus fashion, the man was still hard at work, not finished until everything was done to his satisfaction, which meant it needed to be perfect. Perfectionism was Remus’s MO. It had always been the case, even in college. While James studied and did moderately well, Remus spent most nights in the library, not caring about anything other than getting a 4.0 and working towards veterinary school.

That’s why it had been shocking when instead of going straight into the vet program, Remus had come to work at Deerwolf Ranch. He had said it was because he wanted to earn money and gain experience, which he did by assisting the local veterinarian part-time, but quietly one day, Remus had told James the truth.

He wanted a break. He hadn’t given up on his dreams, but he didn’t come from money, and even with the scholarships Remus was offered, without extra funding, he’d be putting himself in a lot of debt to start school now. It had also been difficult to refuse the offer when Remus had gotten it, having met the local vet, Dr. Pomfrey, at a conference shortly before graduating. Dr. Pomfrey was the one to mention that Alice was looking for a new horse minder.

It suited James that Remus had chosen to be carefree for once, because it meant he had gotten this job, which was perfect for James, who only knew farm life as toiling day and night. He’d gone to school to get an agricultural degree but wasn’t quite ready to go back to the back-breaking work of a real farm. This ranch was just a playground for rich people, a playground that paid way too well.

James knew he’d go back eventually to take over his family’s farm. He loved his parents too much to leave them behind forever, but for now he was enjoying saving money and relaxing. Who wouldn’t want to spend the day riding horses and looking at beautiful mountains? It was heaven.

He was so lost in his thoughts, watching the horses in their stalls, that James barely noticed Remus coming up to him.

“Hey, space cowboy, you in there?” Remus waved a hand in front of James’s face, startling him so badly from his thoughts that he almost tripped over a bucket on the ground.

“You could have said something. Jeez, why are you creepin’ up on me?” James scowled at Remus, who was barely containing his laughter.

“I’ve been saying your name for five minutes”

“Whispering my name across the room doesn’t count.”

“I wasn’t whispering. I’m sure half the valley could hear me shouting your name. They’re gonna think we’re doin’ it.”

James faked a gag, pushing Remus and calling him vulgar. Remus made a kissing face back, James sprinted out of the barn, but Remus kept close behind.

“Awe, Jamie, come get some sugar,” Remus called. 

“If you’re gonna have a workplace romance, you’re supposed to inform your teammates, so we can avoid your grossness,”  Marlene shouted. She was by the backdoor, nose wrinkled at their antics. To be fair, Marlene thought all romance involving men was gross. 

“Remus wants me. I told him he wasn’t my type.” James feigned a sad look, shaking his head solemnly.

“More like I’m too good for you,” Remus said. 

“Yeah, I believe that,” Alice said, coming up behind them. “Now if you two are done goofing off, we have a team meeting.”

James and Remus jostled each other to get in the backdoor first. Alice tried very hard to contain her exasperation, which was aided by Frank handing her a beer as soon as she walked in. She beamed at him, taking her seat at the head of the kitchen table.

“Okay, everyone get your food, let’s discuss what needs to be done,” Alice called, waiting for everyone to take their seats and start eating before she went over the pre-booking checklist. It was all pretty standard stuff, but James knew they were in for a long day tomorrow.

He was pleasantly sleepy when he finally went to bed, mentally going over everything he needed to get done in the morning. The weekend couldn’t end soon enough, and then James would be back to his relaxing fall break from city folk. 

Chapter 2

Chapter by maladaptivewriting

Regulus seriously considered blocking his editor’s phone number before getting on the plane to Wyoming. He knew it wasn’t a very nice thing to do, but he didn’t have any updates for the man and he was starting to lose his mind a bit. He hadn’t been in a writing slump this bad in years, and in the quiet moments right before sleep, he could admit how terrifying it was. 

He’d resolved himself not to think about it on his trip, though. He’d planned the bachelor party to make Barty happy–well, he’d planned it to torture Barty with ranch life, but regardless, he didn’t intend to spend the weekend fretting about his unfinished work. 

Regulus lived relatively close to the airport, he at least lived within walking distance of the D.C. Metro, and could easily hop on a train. 

It was early morning when he left for the train, but not so early that he felt delirious like he usually did. The leaves were just starting to change outside his house and they crunched pleasantly under his feet as he walked to the train stop. The air hadn’t grown too cold yet, it wouldn’t be jacket weather for another month, but he still held a heavy coat tucked over his arm. He expected that Wyoming would be a bit chillier, especially at night. 

He’d overpacked a bit, unsure of what was actually needed for a trip to a dude ranch, and his suitcase kept snagging on dislodged pieces of cement. By the time he made it to the train, he was overstimulated and irritated. He should have just called a car, but he hadn’t wanted to deal with the bumper-to-bumper D.C. traffic. 

Why did he plan this trip again? Suddenly he couldn’t remember. He tried to picture Barty’s face when he figured out where they were going, but even that wasn’t providing any relief. Usually torturing Barty was the first thing to bring a smile to his face. He briefly wondered what Evan was doing this weekend for his party, it must be something fun. He wished he’d been invited to that party. 

Regulus knew that Barty would be miffed at not getting to spend valuable time with his fiancé. Evan likely felt the same way, but he’d always been better about hiding his emotions. Regulus could barely believe they’d managed to sort out their feelings enough to make it to marriage. Or at least, a few weeks from marriage. Something could still go wrong. 

Not that he wanted it to. Regulus actually thought Barty and Evan were good together. He would never say it out loud, but they seemed made for each other. When they weren’t fighting, they understood each other in a way no one else could. Evan softened Barty’s edges, and Barty sharpened Evan’s soft spots. It worked well for them. 

Regulus wasn’t jealous, exactly, but he did sometimes find himself longing for someone who was as well matched for him as Evan and Barty were for each other. 

The train ride to the airport took longer than he would have liked. Regulus didn’t leave the house much anymore so the trains rocking and the constant stops made him vaguely nauseous. He was thoroughly regretting his life choices by the time he made it through security. 

Luckily, he found Lily and Sirius in the exact place he needed–a bar. It was a bit early to be drinking, but Regulus was a firm believer that real-time didn’t exist inside the airport. 

“Reggie!” Sirius shouted. 

“I’ve asked you not to call me that,” Regulus mumbled just as Lily jumped up to hug him. 

He hadn’t seen her in a few weeks, she was buried in an archeology doctoral program and barely had any free time. Her work as an agent had been boring her for a few years now, especially after she bagged Regulus, as she liked to say. She’d always told him that she wanted to get to the end of her life and find that she was comically overeducated, with more degrees than she knew what to do with. Hence the doctoral program that came out of nowhere. 

He hugged her back tightly. He’d missed her warmth. She was the only one he let hug him. “Anyone else here yet?”

“Nope, just us,” Sirius said. “Pete texted me that he was checking in so he should be here soon. No idea about your friend. The special bachelor boy.” 

Regulus groaned while Lily snickered. “Please don’t fight with him.”

“What?” Sirius asked innocently. “I’ve never fought with Barty. Him and I are great friends.” 

“You’re both assholes.”

“Come sit with us,” Lily interrupted, dragging Regulus toward the bar. Regulus smiled softly at her as he climbed up on a bar stool, dropping his backpack on the ground next to him. He’d decided to check his luggage, he didn’t want to be responsible for it on the plane. Not when he planned to be overserved. 

Lily and Sirius jumped right back into whatever conversation they were having before Regulus arrived. Their friendship had surprised Regulus, they hadn’t been friends much in school, but when Lily was in undergrad, she had a brief falling out with her sister, Petunia. Regulus had been up to his ears in classwork and had sent her back to his dorm to wait for him. Only Sirius was also having one of his needy, ‘we need to talk like brothers’ nights that started after their parents died and had been sitting in Regulus’s dorm when Lily arrived. 

Regulus wasn’t sure what happened that night, but when he found them hours later, they were both drunk and playing some ridiculous dance game together. They’d been close ever since. Regulus, to his surprise, wasn’t resentful of their connection. Lily was something like a little sister to Sirius. She was sort of like a bridge between them. 

Peter arrived when Regulus was half a beer deep, and Barty arrived shortly after that. He was dressed in all black athletic gear, but he was also wearing a Nationals baseball cap and a large pair of sunglasses, both of which made him look like he was running from the law. 

“Did he expect a lobbyist to be here?” Sirius whispered to Lily when Barty arrived. 

Lily snickered, elbowing Sirius roughly in the side. 

Barty, it turned out, was somehow very hungover and one drink away from black-out drunk by the time he arrived. Regulus had no idea how he’d managed to get through security. Peter and Regulus shared one look before Peter waved over the bartender, ordering a black coffee and a large glass of water. 

“Barty, for the love of God, what the hell is wrong with you?” Regulus whispered. 

“Evan’s not going to marry me,” Barty mumbled, sitting on the barstool next to Regulus and immediately leaning heavily into his side. 

“What?” Regulus asked, only a bit panicked. 

“He’s too good for me.”

“Did he say that?” Regulus asked, his heart rate slowing. 

“No,” Barty said with a pout. “But I can tell he knows. Do you know what he said to me when he left this morning?” 

“What?” 

“He said he would miss me !” 

“Well, that’s normal, isn’t it? You’ll be apart for a few days.”

“He said it like I was being shipped off to sea or something. What if he’s gone by the time we get back?” 

Regulus looked over his shoulder at the others, but only Lily was paying attention. Sirius was showing Peter one of his newest tattoos, a wolf that took up most of his forearm. 

“Should I call him, do you think?” Lily whispered. 

Regulus shrugged. He had no idea. He wasn’t equipped to deal with Barty’s emotional hissy fits. Lily pulled out her phone and called Evan without another word. They only spoke for a few minutes, but Lily was all smiles so Regulus assumed it couldn’t be too bad. 

“Barty,” she said gently after she’d hung up the phone. 

“Yeah?” Barty asked with a deep and pathetic frown. 

“Evan says he loves you very much and he’s not going to disappear before the wedding, okay?” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yes,” Lily said with an enthusiastic nod. “He even said that if he was missing, that we should call the police ‘cause it means he’s been kidnapped.” 

Barty brightened. “Okay,” he breathed. Regulus rolled his eyes hard enough for them to ache. 

They managed to convince Barty to drink all of the coffee and two glasses of water before they had to board the plane. Regulus had purchased them all first-class seats, they’d have to stop in Denver on the way there, but he didn’t want to spend a moment sitting in coach if he didn’t have to. Plus, it was for Barty. 

Barty, naturally, did not give a shit about the nice seats. He laid his head against the window the moment he was sitting down and instantly fell asleep. Regulus just shook his head. He was determined to have a good time, he hadn’t had a vacation in over a year and even if he was headed to some podunk ranch, he was still going to enjoy himself. 

He briefly thought about getting out his computer, maybe the airplane would encourage him to be creative, but once they were in the air, he found himself dozing off too. 

𐚁

The next day brought with it a frantic energy that James typically enjoyed, but right now he wasn’t feeling it. He’d been promised a couple months with almost no one here and now this last-minute group booking was throwing the ranch into disarray. Most people booked these trips months out, and yeah, occasionally they had last minute guests, but it was usually one or two people. Five people was a little bit more hectic for everyone. He knew these people had to be rich to book for so many with only a couple of days’ notice.

James could already hear Dorcas’s voice, echoing down the hall as he made his way to the front area of the main house. Dorcas worked the front desk, acting as concierge and liaison between the guests and the staff, mainly the housekeepers.

“Hey, Dorcas,” James smiled, giving a wave to the woman. She gave a curt smile back, obviously exasperated by whoever she was on the phone with.

“I know it's short notice… Yes, I sent over… All right, thank you… Of course, you’ll receive a premium.” Dorcas rolled her eyes at this, then said a few more words of appreciation before hanging up. 

She sighed, finally turning a real smile on James.

“James, I’m glad to see you didn’t run away after our summer season.” She stifled a yawn, probably having been here for a couple of hours already, even though the day had barely begun. Dorcas took a sip from her travel mug, which James would bet contained coffee that had more similarities to motor oil than anything in a French press.

“I don’t know how you drink that.” James plugged his nose, faking a gag. “But you won’t be getting rid of me anytime soon this gig is great.”

“Is it?” Dorcas raised an eyebrow, “Most of our ranch hands only last a year or two because they find something else they’d rather be doing.”  

“Who was on the phone?” James diverted the conversation away from his future plans as deftly as he could. Dorcas let it slide with an easy shrug, but he knew she’d bring it up again. She always did. Dorcas was probably the only person on the ranch besides Remus who cared about James’s goals. He didn’t know why it mattered so much. 

“Severus, and of course, he’s not happy about the late booking. Like we can control that.”

“Is he ever happy?”

James had only met Severus a few times, and the man always seemed grumpy, but James had to admit that Severus was a master at his craft. The man owned a boutique, incredibly expensive company that catered to designer bath and spa products. Everything was handmade and tailored to each individual client.

Guests at the ranch filled out surveys on booking to gauge things like favorite scents, problem areas, and preferences. Then, Severus and his team mixed a line of products for each one. It cost a fortune, but the exclusive business contract with Severus was one of the areas that set this ranch apart from its competitors.

Once the products were made, Severus hand-delivered them so that they could be artfully set up in each guest room by the housekeepers. James knew personally that the products were exceptional. The owners had given everybody a gift basket on the anniversary of the ranch opening in May. It included shampoo, conditioner, moisturizers, oils, and a myriad of other products that James had no idea how to use–literally everything a person might need for bathing. James's hair and skin had never been so soft and clean.

“I think he's happy when he's making his potions,” Dorcas said, giving a little shrug. 

“When no one’s bothering him, you mean?” James asked sardonically. 

Dorcas snickered. “Precisely.” 

“Oh, I meant to ask, who's going to be on the housekeeping team this round?” The housekeepers worked in groups of two. It was usually one duo for each booking unless the group was over five people. They’d once had a company rent out every single room, it was the most guests they’d ever had at any given time, and even with every housekeeper working, they could barely keep up. James hoped the five headed to the ranch that weekend wouldn’t put too much strain on whoever was chosen. 

“I believe it’ll be Mary and Em.”

“Awesome, they always do a great job.” James liked most of the housekeepers, but there were a lot of them, and they mainly came from local colleges. Some were definitely better than others, and James didn’t think he could take having to pick up anyone’s slack right now. Mary was reliable, a woman in her later twenties who’d worked as a housekeeper for nearly a decade before taking over the team. Emmaline, or Em, was still pretty new but was eager to work and dedicated to helping out. 

“I tried to get some of the better ones from summer, but you know a lot don’t want to come back.”

“Can’t imagine why,” James laughed, knowing that the ranch guests were probably more demanding than any hotel. The pay might be above average, but he knew they had to work day and night to ensure an optimal experience. The only real breaks they got were when they slept or during the customary overnight trail ride.

“Ugh, I have so much left to do. Do you think you could do a quick inventory for me before you tackle your own stuff?” Dorcas asked, already handing over a clipboard. James nodded, though Dorcas was no longer paying attention. He hurried to the storage room. 

The shelves were lined with toilet paper, towels of every variety from paper to bath, camping necessities, and shelf-stable provisions. He tried to be thorough but quick and rushed the list back to Dorcas, who professed he was absolutely the best person ever. 

He accepted the compliment with a shrug. 

“You owe me,” he tossed over his shoulder as he left the main house. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Dorcas said distractedly, already back to her tasks. 

James barely caught Remus at breakfast before they both had to do their own chores. Today, Remus had the task of beautifying the horses, which according to Remus was a “waste of time” because horses were always beautiful. But the process mostly entailed giving baths and shining hooves to make them look like they were about to enter the show ring. 

Marlene and James did some similar washing up of the cattle as well as feeding and care. They then split up to straighten the many activity areas, checking archery equipment, cleaning the hot tubs and firepits, and preparing everything for the overnight trip. James also had to chop some wood for the pile, because rich people needed fires even if it wasn’t that cold and they had the best central heating in town. It was an “authentic experience” after all. 

When dinner rolled around, James shoveled the food in without tasting it, only interested in getting to his bed as quickly as possible. He did manage to laugh at Marlene reminiscing about Remus’s dramatically anti-social behavior on one of their most recent bookings, but other than that he barely remembered a thing. 

The whirlwind of the day ended with him falling into his bed, without knowing how he had gotten there. His arms and legs throbbed from the intense work he’d done, and he audibly groaned as he landed on the mattress. James could barely change into his pajamas without falling asleep, failing to kick off his jeans and pull on a pair of plaid flannel pants while standing, he dragged them over his hips while still in the bed. Once he'd pulled them on, James rolled over, and he was out till daybreak. 

The next day, James’s only task was to pick up the guests from the airport. Sometimes, Alice or Marlene would do this part, but he’d drawn the short straw this time. The driving wasn’t the issue, even though the airport was over an hour away. James just hated the awkward small talk and trying to entertain the guests. He did much better when he was at the ranch, the conversations at least felt familiar there. 

James scarfed down breakfast, finishing up in record time, and then raced back to his room, barely avoiding barreling into Severus, who was delivering the guests’ products to Dorcas. 

“Were you raised in a barn?” Severus scowled as he swerved out of James’s way. 

“I was, how could you tell?” James smirked, causing the other man’s glare to intensify. James only rolled his eyes, resuming his mission to get back to his room.

He took extra care to make sure he looked professional. James knew that from the time he picked the guests up from the airport till they returned to the ranch, he was the first impression the clients got. He wasn’t interested in being let go because he looked like a slob. Not that that was likely to happen, but he still didn’t want to risk it. Even getting lectured by Alice was something he wanted to avoid. 

James didn’t normally wear a cowboy hat, even though he was a certified farm boy, it had usually been reserved for formal events. He had one beat-up old cowboy hat that he wore when the sun was particularly piercing, but most of the time, he preferred to keep his head uncovered. However, the owners insisted they show the guests what ‘real cowboys’ were like which meant that the ranch hands wore boots, cowboy hats, and pearl snap shirts like they were on the set of a modern western movie. (Or a western porn, if it was late enough in the day and he’d had enough to drink.) James only needed a wild Mustang that trusted him exclusively and some extreme competition that he must win to save his family’s ranch for the whole tableau to be completed.

He settled the hat on his head, giving himself his best half-grin in the mirror before turning to go. It was best not to spend too much time in front of the mirror, or he might give himself a big head. He did look quite dashing in his costume. Throwing on a thick work jacket completed the rugged but charming cowboy aesthetic.

“Honestly, I might be having too much fun with this,” James mumbled, smiling to himself.

“Are you talking to yourself, instead of heading to the airport?” Alice stood arms crossed at the end of the hallway.

“I’m not late,” James defended, picking up his pace despite his words, passing by her and going in search of the keys for the big, black, luxury SUVs they used to pick up their guests.

“No, you aren’t late yet, but don’t forget you need to stop for gas before picking them up.”

“Shoot, yeah, yeah, okay, I won’t. I’m leaving now.” James snatched the keys from the hooks hanging inside the ‘employees only’ door, pocketed them, and gave a wave to Alice, who still stood arms crossed watching him, a look somewhere between pleased and disappointed on her sharp face. 

“Oh, and get water for the car!” she shouted. James nodded, giving Alice a thumbs up, which she responded to with a shake of her head before giving him a wave to send him on his way.

James got into the front seat, slammed the door shut, and took off. Not that he needed to rush so much, but better early than late, especially with rich people who thought they ran the world. They always acted like their time was far more valuable than his. James stopped to get gas a few miles from the ranch, pulling into an old-fashioned gas station that people rarely used. 

After filling up the tank, he went inside to grab a case of water and ended up spending a few minutes checking on the store owner, Mr. Filch. The old man didn’t have any family left. He’d lived out in a rural area of Wyoming growing up with only his parents and after they passed away, he was left alone. He’d never married, which wasn’t a surprise given his odd and erratic behavior, and James wasn’t sure that he had any real friends beyond the truckers who stopped in to buy lottery cards. 

Mr. Filch was always lamenting the lack of environmental stewardship of “over-privileged children,” which James tended to agree with until Filch delved into his conspiracy theories about witches causing climate change. He did that in most conversations. James always tried to listen but once the conspiracies were brought up, he had to politely excuse himself.

He brought the water back to the SUV, stocking each of the door pockets with a bottle, and stowing the rest in the trunk. Then, he was back on the road to the airport, cranking his music for the rest of the hour drive. At the ranch, they always listened to Country music. It wouldn’t be appropriate to play anything else, so when James was alone he always went searching for something completely different. Today it was Alternative Rock, Remus’s favorite, and the loud blaring was just enough to distract him from the upcoming tasks of picking up the ranch’s clients.

The drive wasn’t bad, despite the time it took. The scenery made it for James: the mountains, and the soft rolling plains, dotted with only a few signs of civilization. The leaves had started to change already and the bright golds and reds decorated his vision like a personal painting made just for him. He loved the way it looked so empty, as if they were the only ones out there. It was all a trick though, he knew there were more people around than it seemed, they were just really good at hiding out there, but James enjoyed the mimicry of isolation regardless. 

It scared the crap out of most of the city people though. James thought they didn’t realize how quiet the world could be, or how dark. It made him laugh just thinking about this next batch, pretending at country-living. The moment the sun set and the world didn’t fill with city lights, they would be shaking in their boots. Or their Oxford dress shoes since they rarely actually wore boots. 

He arrived at the airport quicker than he thought, since he hadn’t encountered any arrent tractors or bison slowing down traffic. He might have also been speeding a bit, but he hadn’t been paying close enough attention to know. James pulled up to the short-term parking lot and waited in the car until an appropriate amount of time before the flight was scheduled to arrive. He actually watched what he thought was the plane coming into land, which is when he made his way slowly into the terminal.

James always thought he should bring a sign, one of those obnoxious ‘BLANK PARTY’ ones, but the size of the airport seemed to make it woefully unnecessary, and the owners usually thought they were tacky. Apparently, it was more sophisticated to wander aimlessly around the airport, hoping to flag down the correct group. As usual, James didn’t know what the group looked like, but typically, it was easy to spot people looking for their ride. 

Alice usually tried to give a general description of the guests so they’d be easier to locate. However, this booking had been so last minute that she hadn’t been able to give him anything. 

“I don’t know anything about these folks,” she said with a shrug. “Good luck!” 

He stood just outside the security gates, leaning against one of the walls and keeping a lookout for the group. James hoped they’d just come to him, but that had only happened a handful of times when he was especially lucky. The normal formula was James walking up to every group of appropriate look and size asking if they were going to Deerwolf Ranch, making himself look like an incompetent idiot.  

James turned his head as a group walked out, drawn to their laughing and talking. Most of them seemed to be pulling expensive-looking luggage, and James thought that they must be the ones. 

They seemed like a mismatched group, one of them tall and lanky with a miserable look on his face like he’d been forced on the trip and was planning to make his escape the moment he had the chance and another short with round cheeks and a grin so wide that it took up most of his face. With them was an aristocratic-looking man with black hair down past his shoulders, all of it perfectly sculpted into curls that framed his sharp face. He was fully covered in black clothing, but near his wrists and neck, James could just make out the edges of tattoos. He was probably covered in them. 

Leading the group was a couple, half of which was a woman with fiery red hair pulled back into a high ponytail. Her face reminded James of the moon, round and comforting, her green eyes so vibrant that they made her look like a perfectly animated character rather than a regular woman. She was wearing beat-up cowboy boots tucked under her jeans. James’s eyes snagged on them and he wondered if she’d spent a lot of time riding or if she’d just grown up in the south. Next to her was a disturbingly handsome man. He had to be related to the tattooed guy, their faces held the same sharp features. James hadn’t realized that he’d been saving the best for last, but when his eyes settled on the man’s face, he knew he had. 

Unfortunately, the man also looked like he hated James’s guts. His face was settled into something like a glare, the dark circles under his eyes making him look angry like a stormcloud, and he was staring right at James with disdain. Great , he thought, we’re off to a great start . 

He sighed, straightening up, brushing himself off, and adjusting his hat in preparation for beginning the great facade of wholesome ranch life. 

This weekend couldn’t end soon enough. 

Chapter 3

Barty slept until they landed in Denver. Regulus had to shake him so hard to wake him up that he got at least three dirty looks from the other passengers in first class. He gave them all an awkward smile and hoped they wouldn’t report him for flying with someone too messed up to wake properly. Barty likely wasn’t even drunk anymore, it had been hours, but he’d always been a disturbingly deep sleeper, especially when he was sad. 

And he was always sad when Evan wasn’t around. Regulus thought he was pathetic, but he knew that Barty’s melancholy was the least of his worries. 

They made their way through the Denver airport slowly, Barty dragging behind with Peter. Lily abandoned them the moment they deplaned, going off in search of the women’s restroom and a gift shop. 

“I have to buy a magnet for Petunia! You know how she gets when I don’t bring her back a trinket.” 

Regulus did know. Petunia was very spoiled with her trinket collection from friends and family. She’d even demanded Regulus start sending her some when he went on trips, which was ridiculous considering she lived three hundred miles away from him and he had to mail all of them anyway. Speaking of which, he’d have to see if they sold one at the ranch. If he didn’t send her one, she’d start sending threatening pictures of her infant son through email. 

Once Lily was gone, that left Sirius and Regulus walking slowly next to each other. Sirius still looked vaguely green, he was a bit scared of flying, though he refused to admit it, so he wasn’t speaking much, keeping his eyes down as he put one foot in front of the other. 

“Do you think they’ll let us choose the horse we get to ride?” Regulus asked. 

One corner of Sirius’s mouth turned up. “You know, I just don’t believe you’re going to be riding much of anything.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

Sirius’s smirk widened. “Do you or do you not remember when Uncle Cygnus made us go on Cissy’s Girl Scouts horseback riding trip?”

Regulus stared at him in confusion for only a moment before understanding dawned on him. He groaned. “Oh, God, I forgot about that.” He covered his face with both of his hands. “I was six years old, Sirius!” 

Sirius cackled loudly enough to draw stares. They were not doing a good job of blending in today. “You–you–you remember when–” Sirius kept cutting himself off, he was laughing too hard to properly get the words out. 

“Yes, yes,” Regulus hissed desperately. “We don’t need to relive it now. I remember just fine.”

“Oh my God,” Sirius gasped. “Cissy was so mortified, remember she threatened to throw you in the river and drown you?” 

“You’re making us look insane.”

“I couldn’t believe you suggested this for Barty’s party.”

“Well, I obviously didn’t think about that! And it’s not going to happen again. I was six! Six year olds have terrible bladder control.” 

Sirius broke out into another fit of laughter, now incapable of responding to Regulus at all. Regulus ground his teeth together and picked up his pace, leaving Sirius behind. He should have known better than to bring his brother on this trip. It was just that he didn’t know that many people, he didn’t really like to leave his home, and he struggled to make new friends. When he got back, he would try to make a few acquaintances. That way the next time he had to plan a trip like this, Sirius wouldn’t make the guest list. 

They made it to the gate twenty minutes before boarding, Lily rejoining them seconds after they got in line. Barty was still looking morose, but he was at least awake and talking to Peter. The two of them had been unusual friends. Regulus never would have predicted them getting along, but he was pretty sure they talked more than Regulus talked to either of them individually. 

The flight from Denver to Jackson was only about two hours, and Regulus finally managed to catch a few minutes of sleep on the way there. However, when he woke up to the plane landing, he felt frazzled and tired, the long day of travel finally catching up to him. He scratched at his hair distractedly while they deplaned. 

He went to the restroom and sighed when he saw how disheveled he looked. He never looked good after flying. Although, did anyone? Regulus wasn’t sure but he thought he might look worse than most. He quickly splashed some water on his face and used his damp hands to tame his hair, reshaping a couple of the curls with the end of his pointer finger. 

It wasn’t his best look, but it would have to do. 

Whatever, he thought dismissively, shrugging at himself. He was just here to give Barty shit, he wasn’t trying to impress anyone. 

Lily led the way through the exit after they picked up their bags, her eyes bright and curious. “I’ve never been this far west,” she said to Sirius. She was strictly an East Coast girl, having been born in South Carolina and gone to school in Boston before moving to D.C. She shimmed her shoulders as they walked, making Regulus smile slightly. 

The two of them had met in college, and Regulus had been sure they’d only speak for as long as they had class together, but Lily had wormed her way into his life with a defiance he didn’t think someone could possess. She seemed unreasonably determined to be his friend and after a while, he just gave in, deciding it was easier to let her stick around than to continue trying to evade her friendship advances. Now, years later, he couldn’t imagine a life without her in it. 

Regulus looked away from her as they moved through the exit into the main lobby of the airport, his eyes drifting up right in time to land on one of the most handsome men he’d ever seen in his life. He was dressed like a cowboy, an actual cowboy, with the cowboy hat and everything. His curly hair was pressed down around his ears like a jungle begging to be set free. His eyes were the kind of hazel that made him look ethereal, stealing Regulus’s breath right out from inside him. He was tall, several inches taller than Regulus, and based on the width of his shoulders, he was likely fit too. Regulus wondered what his arms looked like under that shirt. 

Unfortunately, right as Regulus was glancing up at him, he caught the exact moment that the man saw Lily. He was watching her with interest, his eyes dragging on the way her hips were hugged tight by her well fitted jeans. By the time the man’s gaze landed on him, Regulus already felt defeated. 

He’s straight , he thought. Straight and hot and attracted to a damn lesbian . 

Regulus stared at the man blankly and felt shocked with the way the man’s face dropped into an irritated frown for just a second, before a large, fake smile stretched across his lips.

“Howdy, y’all,” the man greeted, his accent a little drawn out, though it didn’t sound fake. “Would any of you happen to be Regulus Black?” 

Regulus felt his eyebrow twitch. Of course the sound of his name on this man’s tongue would make him want to drop to his knees. “That’s me,” he said stiffly, his voice dry and cutting to hide the attraction he felt. He didn’t know what people in Wyoming were like, and he didn’t want to make his man feel uncomfortable around him. Who knew how he would treat a gay man? 

The man’s smile faltered only slightly. “Excellent,” he said before launching into a spiel that Regulus was sure the man was forced to memorize. Regulus mostly tuned him out, taking in the way his shirt hugged his biceps as he moved his arms while talking. He wondered how inappropriate it would be to look up cowboy porn once he got to his room. “And my name is James. Now, does anyone have any questions?” 

Regulus glanced around the group to see if any of them would speak. When they didn’t, he replied. “No, I think we’re fine.” 

James’s eyes narrowed, just enough to be noticeable, but he nodded and gestured for them to follow him. He grabbed two bags from them to help them along, one from Lily– of course –and one from Peter. Peter, to Regulus’s vast entertainment, seemed oddly charmed by the gesture. Peter was straight, completely straight, so straight that he’d actually tried hooking up with a guy twice in college just so he could tell everyone that he’d tried it and it wasn’t for him. 

They followed James to the short term parking lot, reaching a nice SUV after only a few minutes. There were quite a lot of people in their group and though they could all sit in the back, Regulus was antsy to get a bit of time away from them. 

“I’ll sit up front,” Regulus said. It didn’t have anything to do with the handsome cowboy. Definitely not. 

“All right,” James said, loading up their bags in the trunk with ease. Regulus tried not to let his eyes linger on James’s arms as he did it. This is going to be a problem . Maybe they had a really ugly cowboy that worked there too, that would be better for Regulus. Otherwise, he was going to end up making a fool out of himself. 

Once in the front seat of the car, Regulus stretched his legs out in front of him, lifting his hips twice in order to get comfortable, and when he looked over he found James watching him move. His eyes seemed almost judgmental. 

“Yes?” Regulus asked dryly. 

One of James’s eyebrows lifted, almost mockingly. Regulus felt his cock twitch in his pants. “Nothing,” James grumbled. James didn’t like Regulus, of that he was sure, but he tried not to let it bother him. 

“How long is the drive?” 

James stared away from him, his eyes locked onto the highway as merged in between two semi-trucks. “Not long,” James said. 

Regulus rolled his eyes. “Fine,” Regulus snarked. 

James pursed his lips then tilted his head like he was having an internal argument with himself. His eyes were very careful to never leave the road, so Regulus was able to stare at him without issue. He probably should have tried harder not to be a little weirdo, but he rarely saw men he was attracted to in D.C. so he wasn’t used to having to control himself. 

The drive to the ranch took just over an hour. Regulus guessed that it didn’t usually take that long, but that James was driving extra carefully so the ride would be smooth for everyone in the car. He was a good driver, Regulus noted, very controlled. His large hands wrapped around the steering wheel like it was nothing but a toy, maneuvering around cars so fluidly that Regulus barely noticed them moving. He wondered what those hands would feel like against his skin, then he purposefully shook the thought from his head. He could think about it later when he was alone. 

Deerwolf ranch was beautiful, nestled between the tall rock formations off in the distance, trees and huge hills rolled as far as the eye could see, and in the distance, there was a massive waterfall that fed into a river that ran straight through the ranch. It was gorgeous, like something out of an old western painting. 

It was so magnificent that he didn’t even notice he was staring at it open-mouthed until James snorted. Regulus glanced over at him to see James rolling his eyes and shaking his head. Regulus was being mocked again , which was very rude, but unfortunately also did odd things to his stomach. He cleared his throat awkwardly and climbed out of the SUV, landing unsteadily on his feet. 

“You all right there?” Another man asked, catching Regulus by the elbow. Regulus looked up at him, way up , his head tilting back far enough for his neck to hurt to look at the man. Jesus Christ, he was handsome too. Was every cowboy at this stupid ranch hot? 

“I’m fine, thank you,” Regulus said quickly, withdrawing his elbow from the man’s grasp as gently as he could. He headed right into the lobby, keeping his eyes down so he wouldn’t embarrassment himself further. Not today, at least. 

𐚁

“Can you believe these people?” James huffed, watching the group head into the main house. All of them followed the one guy who’d sat up front with him. James hadn’t asked his name, which was rude, but he didn’t care. That guy was rude to him first. Glaring at him, demanding to sit up front like he didn’t trust James to drive. Please. He was such an ass. 

Remus chuckled quietly. “How much could they have done to you in an hour?” Remus said. Both of them headed toward the staff area, Remus pouring himself a glass of water and downing it in one go. He didn’t look like he’d been out working yet, he barely had any sweat on his skin, but then again his cheeks were a bit red. 

“I don’t know, there is something about that guy.” James narrowed his eyes as if he could glare at him through the many walls that separated them. “The black haired one.”

“Which black haired one?” Remus’s response came oddly fast. James raised an eyebrow at him and Remus’s face flushed an even brighter red. 

“The short haired one. The one who’s here with his girlfriend.” He didn’t say girlfriend like a snotty child bitter over a lost toy, but it was a close thing. Remus certainly didn’t miss his tone. 

“He brought his girlfriend to a bachelor party?” Remus asked. 

“They’re here for a bachelor party?” 

“That’s what Alice told me,” Remus said with a shrug. “Are you interested in her?”

“Alice?” 

“No,” Remus laughed. “The red head.” 

“She’s very pretty,” James responded vaguely. Remus’s eyes sparkled knowingly. He’d known James a long time, far too long if he was able to pick up on James’s feelings that quickly. 

“And the guy sitting up front with you?” 

James looked away, biting the inside of his cheek unhappily. 

“You think he’s pretty too?” Remus asked mockingly. 

“Fuck off,” James said with a laugh. “He spent the whole ride glaring at me. I could see him out of the corner of my eye.” 

“If I remember correctly, I was pretty sure you liked being glared at,” Remus said thoughtfully. 

James wondered if he should use his one piece of ammunition now–Remus’s peaked interest with the other black haired guy. He decided against it after a moment of pondering, he could use that later if needed. 

“Whatever, let’s just get ready for this dinner,” James grumbled, ignoring Remus’s barked laugh. 

James and Remus went to help set up the dinner room, technically they weren’t required to, but ranch life instilled a short of ‘everyone helps’ attitude. When it was just the regular staff, they all ate at the big kitchen table. It was cozy and made everyone feel like family. It was easy to get lonely living so far out from civilization so Alice worked hard to make sure everyone felt supported. 

The dining room table was a giant piece of uncut wood that had probably cost a fortune, and could seat twenty people at least. Em and Mary had already placed center pieces and a table runner, so James and Remus helped by bringing out the dishes and silverware. It was supposed to be ‘rustic elegant,’ or so their interior designer had told them, and to James, it certainly looked that way.

Once the table was set and everyone else went back to their own tasks, James headed to his room to freshen up, changing his shirt and wetting his hair a bit to try to tame the hat-hair he’d gotten, but it didn’t exactly do much. The black curls did their own thing, and James had long ago given up trying to force them to do really anything he wanted.

He met up with Remus in the hallway, their custom before any gathering. Mary had told them once that they always looked better as a pair and it seemed to have stuck with them. This time Remus looked oddly nervous–well,more nervous than he usually did when he had to talk to someone other than a horse. He was always a bit awkward with new people. 

“What’s up with you?” James asked, watching Remus fiddle with the cuffs of his sleeves. Remus instantly stopped.

“Nothing. Let’s get going. I’m starving.”

James eyed him curiously but decided to let it go. They had to make their appearances for the welcome dinner, then once the presentation was done, they got to go eat in the kitchen. James was glad they didn’t have to eat with the guests, that would be too much, especially on this particular evening.

The welcome dinner had a deceptive quality to it, since rich people apparently didn’t enjoy being told what to do, the owners had devised a pseudo-presentation that usually made people listen. The staff brought out food and drinks while Alice made a spiel about how being outdoors can change people, or some other similar dribble. James was never there for that part.

Then, each of the staff was introduced with their roles, hoping to engender the guests to be nice and listen. The guests were then allowed to eat and be merry while James and the rest of the staff faded into the background, most of them leaving to eat separately, or operating as waiters for the meal. 

James thought it worked for the most part; apparently when the ranch had first begun, they used to leave detailed letters in the rooms for guests when they arrived, hoping it would give them a bit more freedom at the ranch. But it turned out that most of their letters went ignored and people kept doing things that were expressly against the rules and nearly getting themselves killed. Most guests couldn’t comprehend how dangerous nature could be. 

As they walked closer to the dining room, James could smell the scent of Frank’s cooking wafting out of the kitchen and it made his stomach rumble embarrassingly loudly. They stopped short of the entrance, finding Marlene, Dorcas, Emmeline, and Mary already waiting.

“Took you guys long enough,” Marlene snapped. James paid her no mind. He knew her irritation stemmed from hunger and wasn’t actually aimed at him. He’d learned that about her long ago. 

“James had to make himself beautiful,” Remus said with a sigh. “It’s a shame it didn’t work.” He patted James on the shoulder. James tried to blow Remus up with his mind. Before anyone could add their two cents on the subject of James’s beautification, Alice opened the door with a flourish.

“And now, I’d like to properly introduce all our staff.” Everyone trudged into the room, trying to appear happy and enthusiastic about service. James for his part tried to avoid looking at any of the guests directly, especially one specifically. 

Alice made the initial introductions, giving everyone a chance to explain their work and profess their undying devotion to making this experience magical like it was Disney World or something. She worked her way down the line until it was only Marlene, James and Remus left.

“I work closely with our two ranch hands, Marlene and James.” Alice gestured to them. James gave a tight smile and a little wave. “I’ll let them explain more about what they do here.”

James hated this part; it brought back memories of ice breakers in school. ‘Tell us two truths and a lie,’ ‘tell us something memorable’ as if James’s academic work wasn’t enough. He also had to be interesting and sociable.

Marlene gave her little half of the speech, talking about how ranch life wasn’t exactly like in the movies, but it was pretty darn close. James usually had to stifle his laughter at that, she even used an exaggerated accent to drive home the point. She finished speaking, and now it was James’s turn.

“Marlene and I work closely together, but we usually have specific activities we each lead. If there is something you’re interested in doing during your stay, please tell Dorcas and we’ll arrange to be there to accompany you.” 

James cleared his throat, suddenly feeling the weight of the eyes on him, particularly a pair of steely grey ones. 

“Our biggest event is, of course, the overnight trail ride. It gives the full authentic experience for what it would be like to be a full-time rancher, but don’t worry–the food is better, we promise.” 

James watched one of the guys, the one who looked like he wanted to escape earlier, send a searing look toward the one James was trying not to look at. A wide evil grin crossed his perfect features, stealing the rest of James’s speech right out of his mouth. He looked different when he smiled, softer somehow, even with the wicked twinkle in his eye. After a moment, the man’s grey eyes landed back on James. 

Marlene suddenly elbowed him hard in the side. He looked over at her to see her eyebrows raised halfway up her forehead. 

“Uh, right, well that’s kind of everything from us. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to find me or Marlene for help.” James nodded at Marlene, who gave him a less-than impressed look.

“Thank you, James and Marlene. And last but not least, the remaining formidable member of our staff, Mr. Remus Lupin, our resident horse whisperer.” Alice clapped her hands together, smiling at Remus. James was just relieved his portion was over. 

Remus slunk himself forward, waving and cleared his throat. While he was usually reserved, if given the chance to talk about the horses, Remus could go on and on. After their first trial run of their welcome dinners, Alice had decided to give Remus a script so that he wouldn’t be tempted to talk for thirty minutes without stopping. He was told to follow the script and say nothing else, or they’d all get trapped in a monologue about varying horse breeds and the way they shaped human history.

Once all the speeches were done, Alice gave a few parting words, and signaled for food to be brought in. James hadn’t even noticed Emmeline and Mary going to the kitchen until they reappeared with dishes. The rest of the staff moved to depart to their own meals when a voice rang out.

“Do you guys not stay for dinner?” It was the other black-haired one, the tattooed one. 

“Oh, usually the staff eats on their own. To give the guests time to themselves,” Alice replied, her put-together exterior momentarily disarmed by the unusual question. Only one group of guests since James had been here had ever asked about them eating together and they were nearing their late 80s. He was pretty sure the only reason they’d asked is because they were too old to realize how weird it was to do such a thing. 

“Would it be possible for you to stay? I’m sure we’d all love to hear more about ranch life.” The man spoke to everyone but James didn’t miss the way his eyes lingered on Remus. James inwardly groaned at the request–and the reason for it–hoping Alice would make some excuse.

“Of course, we’d love to stay,” Alice said tightly. James knew she must be feeling the urge to bolt too, but she was the lead on the ranch for a reason. She gave a jerking nod to James, Marlene, and Remus, a silent signal to get on with it. James tried to keep his face composed in serene happiness, but he wasn’t sure he was successful.

Marlene moved quickly to fill a vacant spot by the red-haired woman. She’d once told James that she didn’t think most men were worth speaking to. The tattooed man moved down a few seats and gestured for James and Remus to take them, placing James right next to the short-haired man. James was careful to avoid his eye, he would not be glared at through dinner. Alice took the seat at the head of the table, closest to the man with the frown.

“Thanks,” the tattooed man said. “I’m sure you guys meet a lot of people. I’m Sirius, by the way.” He gave a sparkling grin, aimed right at Remus. Remus didn’t get a second to reply before Sirius was moving on. “That’s Barty, the star of the show.”

“Please leave me out of this,” the frowning one–Barty–mumbled. 

“Peter, my dearest friend.” Peter shook his head and shared a look with Barty. “Lily, she was invited because Regulus, my brother, as I’m sure you can tell, doesn’t have any friends.”

“Hey! I was invited because I’m more likable than the rest of you,” Lily snarked, though she threw the short haired man– Regulus , his name was Regulus. What a name. “And because Regulus doesn’t have any friends.”

“I’m going to have even less friends after this,” Regulus said through an impossibly sharp smile. 

He looked like the kind of man who was raised to use fourteen different pieces of silverware at night, but he acted like the kind of man who might stab someone if they got too close. Sirius grinned back at him, unbothered by his brother’s ire. He turned back to Remus before speaking again. 

“I would like to hear more about horses,” Sirius beamed at Remus as he spoke. Remus looked a bit like he’d been shot and the pain hadn’t set in yet. He was so surprised by someone wanting him to blab about horses that he didn’t even notice his mouth hanging open. James would have been happy for him, except that meant he was left alone next to Regulus. 

Only a few moments passed before Regulus spoke. James had oddly expected him to stay quiet the entire night like he was during the drive. 

“Was being a ranch hand your life goal?” The question from Regulus immediately set James’s teeth on edge. He had to take a deep breath to keep from snapping at him. Every word that came out of his mouth sounded sarcastic like he was looking down on James. 

“Yes, this is the only thing I’ve ever wanted to do.” James’s reply dripped with sarcasm. He finally looked over at Regulus just in time to see his eyebrow quirk slightly. James felt like he was being scrutinized. He turned away and began to fill his plate, taking his sweet time adding every side that he could. The staff always ate the same thing that the guests were served, but James was annoyed that it seemed to taste better in the expensive dining room, taking a bite of a baked sweet potato. 

Regulus hummed. “I thought this might be a waylay for you.” He spoke like he was already bored. 

James worked not to roll his eyes. He turned back to the man, worried he might really snap this time, but was stopped short by the way the corners of Regulus’s lips turned up. His eyes were sharp, the dark circles still present, that mean look worn like he’d been born with it, but there was something playful about his lips. 

“No, I wasn’t ambushed by this job,” James replied, his voice still sarcastic, but it was less harsh this time. Regulus’s smile widened just slightly. 

“I’m surprised you know what that word means.” Regulus looked away as he said it, his voice dry with boredom. Only his lips gave him away. James felt a smile creeping on his own face, but he managed to stop it. Regulus started adding food to his plate, but slowly, checking each item before he allowed it to grace his presence. 

“Yes, surprisingly, I am able to read,” James replied. 

Regulus glanced back at him, watching him from below his eyelashes. James wondered what he would look like if he was much lower than he was now. On his knees, perhaps. “I’m shocked, I assume it’s mostly the Sunday comics then?” Regulus said. 

“Yep, that and the back of the cereal box.” James shook his head, pushing his lips together to keep from saying something too mean, “Is it true you don’t have any friends?”

Regulus groaned. “I shouldn’t have brought Sirius on this trip,” he mumbled. “I have friends, it’s just most of them are going to his–” he pointed his fork at Barty “–fiancé’s bachelor party so I couldn’t invite them. I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel on this one.” He shot a glare at Sirius and Lily. Sirius didn’t see it, he fully had his back turned as he listened to Remus yammer on about horses. Lily, on the other hand, broke off from whatever she was saying to sneer at Regulus. 

“Why did you choose the ranch for his bachelor party?” James asked, genuinely curious. Barty didn’t seem to be enjoying himself very much. He was pushing the food around his plate like he was hoping to drown in it. 

Regulus’s mean smile was back. “Oh, because Barty is terrified of horses.” 

“I’m going to put rats in your bed,” Barty hissed. 

“I’d like to see you try,” Regulus said politely back. 

James really did laugh then, no longer able to hold it in. “You’re insane,” he said. 

Regulus looked a bit chagrined. “Yes, well,” he said, shoving a bite of food in his mouth when he seemed incapable of coming up with anything else to say. 

Before James could say anything else, Peter asked Regulus a question and the two of them spent the rest of the evening talking about Peter’s job. James had a hard time following the conversation, he kept trying to figure out what Peter did for a living, but none of it made sense to him. 

It wasn’t long before everyone had finished eating and were starting to head up to bed, Lily and Peter leaving first.

“Well, James,” Regulus said, he said his name like he was trying to taste it. “I guess this is goodnight.”

James’s mouth felt suddenly dry, but he managed to get out a soft, “Goodnight,” in reply. Regulus gave him another appraising look, something curious behind his cutting gaze, before standing from the table and heading for the door. The ranch had one large building crafted like a roomy hotel, but there was also a string of cabins within walking distance of the main house that could be rented by groups or big spenders. 

Regulus and the others had booked one of their nicest cabins, the one farthest from the main house, and though James had no reason to, they’d had all but one cordial conversation, he wished that Regulus was staying a bit closer. 

“Yeah, night, Sirius,” Remus said, watching Sirius leave. 

“Wait up, Reg,” Sirius yelled as he scampered off after the rest of the group, “where’s your girlfriend, she looked angry at dinner.” James barely heard the last part, but it was enough to make his happier mood drop. 

“Wow,” James said, annoyed. 

“What?” Remus asked. His eyes were abnormally bright but James could already see him missing the point of what had just happened. James didn’t feel like explaining it. He couldn’t be mad that Regulus had a girlfriend. 

“Nothing,” James said with a smile. “That guy really wanted to know about horses, huh?”

“Yeah! I didn’t know people from the city could be that interested in horses,” Remus said. After a beat he added, “How was your conversation with Regulus? Do you still dislike him?”

James thought of Regulus’s mean little smile. “Oh, absolutely.”

Chapter 4

James should have known his annoyance would only bring more problems. He dreamed of skin on skin, of touches that felt like fire, of hot mouths and wet tongues and gripping fingers digging bruises into his skin. He woke painfully hard and irritated, which was just how James needed to start his day of babysitting rich people who don’t know how to string a bow or mount a horse. 

“Goddammit!” James hissed, slamming his fists down on his mattress. He didn’t want to jerk off to that asshole, but he also knew that if he didn’t do something, he’d spend the day on edge. James half-growled, grinding his teeth roughly together as his hand drifted resignedly into his pajama bottoms.

He grasped his cock and knew he’d only need a few strokes to get himself off, he was so hard. James thought back to the dream, only a few wisps of it still lingering. His mind kept conjuring up new images along with the ones it had been haunting him with all night. Regulus on his knees taking James cock into that smart mouth of his, his black hair grasped in James’s palm.

James swallowed his moan as his cock jerked with his orgasm. He pulled his pajamas over his still twitching dick, and stumbled out of bed to clean himself up. His shame at masturbating to a guest, something James had never done before, was slightly overshadowed by how quickly he’d come. 

Humiliation clung to his skin as he showered. Regulus had him acting like a randy teenager, his self control already out the window and the day had just started. 

When he went down for breakfast, he felt like everyone knew his secret, and instead of his morning activity having the desired calming effect, James only felt more on edge, which was not helped at all when the group was divided for today's activities.

“Alright if we can have y'all break up into two groups? We like to have each group of two to have at least one guide.” Alice asked as the guests sat lounging in the front room of the main house. 

There were big leather chairs and tables scattered around the room for guests to use, and this group had managed to take up most of the room even with their limited size. Not one of them was sitting close to each other. If he didn’t know any better, James would have thought none of them knew each other. 

“James will take one group and Marlene will take the other.” 

Marlene stepped forward and grinned, her smile sparkling. James tried to do the same but it was difficult when he was working not to make eye contact with Regulus. He felt irrationally afraid the man would be able to read his mind, that he would take one look at him and know exactly what he’d been up to that morning. 

“I refuse to be with Regulus and since it’s my bachelor party, I get what I want,” Barty said with a pout, seeming more like a child than a man about to get married. He was wearing an absurdly expensive coat over his clothes. James knew he hadn’t been expecting to come to the ranch, and he almost felt bad for the overdressed man. 

“Fine by me,” Regulus threw back childishly. He looked annoyed but James got the distinct impression that he was enjoying himself a little too much. He could barely hold back his eye roll with the antics.

“Which group gets Remus?” Of course, that came from Sirius. He was overdressed too, the button down shirt he was wearing was opened enough that James could see his tattoos and chest hair sticking out. He was certain that wasn’t on accident, though he wondered if Remus would notice. 

“Well…” Alice didn’t seem to know how to answer that, since Remus generally wouldn’t assist with such a small group. Not to mention that Alice hadn’t even mentioned Remus to begin with. 

“Whoever’s with me gets Remus.” Marlene shot James a triumphant look. James just barely kept himself from sneering back. She knew he loved dragging Remus along to help him. Just his fucking luck. He scowled at Marlene, who only smirked.

“Then I’m with you,” Sirius said with a grin.

“I’ll go with Sirius. The better Black brother.” Barty tilted his head with a superior smirk, but the words came out in a way that made James think this was a familiar diss. James didn’t want to look over to see Regulus’s expression, but he could almost feel the eye roll from here.

“I’ll go with Marlene,” Lily chimed in, her smile oddly mischievous.

“No, you stay with Regulus. Bachelor veto.” Barty waved his hand like he was shooing a fly. Lily glared at him and crossed her arms with a huff. She clearly wanted to argue, which seemed odd to James. Wouldn’t she want to be with her boyfriend? The thought made James clench his teeth. He was going to crack a molar this weekend if he wasn’t careful. 

“Our group will be better anyway, Lil.” Regulus gestured her over, and she uncrossed her arms with an exaggerated sigh. 

“And as usual, I’m the only one left,” Peter said with an exaggerated yawn. 

“We thought you wouldn’t wake up at all, lazy ass,” Lily said, and Peter smiled at her. 

“I thought about it, but figured I might need to mediate again,” Peter said these words in the sage manner of someone who was often brought in to deal with other people’s problems. He didn’t seem all that bothered by it though. 

“Well, let’s get on with this,” James said gruffly. It came out more impatient than he thought it would, but he still felt like shit and he wanted nothing more than to go back to his room. He wanted this weekend to be over, especially now that he had to spend the day with Regulus and his girlfriend. 

He didn’t miss the look Marlene gave him or the disapproving glare that came from Alice. He cleared his throat and pretended he wasn’t fazed. He had momentarily forgotten Alice was here, and now he was regretting his snippy attitude. James hoped he could last this day without getting fired, he really needed to reel in his dark mood, which would not be helped by having to spend so much time with Regulus. 

“Alright, let’s get started.” Alice clapped her hands cheerfully. “Marlene will be taking the first group to pan for gold, and the other group will follow James and I to archery.” 

“You’re coming too?” James asked quietly. Alice only nodded. 

Once they were outside, she started leading the trio of guests as if they were children at a summer camp and not rich people spending too much money to pretend to be western movie characters. James lingered a bit, bringing up the rear and using the time to watch Regulus without him knowing. It was like his eyes couldn’t help but find the other man, and it was making James’s brain hurt, he was pretty sure he had a permanent scowl on his face. 

Regulus could have helped him out by wearing clothes that weren’t so revealing. Okay, maybe revealing wasn’t the right word. He was covered head to toe, jeans and long sleeved Henley, but every item of clothing was perfectly fitted to his body. The way his jeans hugged his hips was practically indecent. James wanted to hook his fingers through Regulus’s belt loops and pull his hips back– he really needed to get a grip. 

The group stopped short as they neared the first activity of the day: archery. It was always a big hit with the guests, even though they’d never had one who could hit a target more than a few times. Alice immediately made her way to the shed that housed the bows and arrows. The targets were already set up with two at a closer distance and the rest set up at different intervals.  They would spend an hour here, just enough time for the guests to try–and fail–to hit all the targets. 

James had yet to see anyone improve that dramatically, but sometimes the guests had a surprising knack for it, they might even be able to hit three . Usually that meant they did some kind of wealthy shooting activity, but James knew shooting a bow and arrow was very different than a gun. 

“Okay, everyone, let’s go over some safety items. Then, we can practice shooting the targets.” Alice relayed all the usual things about not standing in front of the line of firing and never to point the arrows at something living. Even though these were safety arrows, they would leave bruises and could definitely poke an eye out if aimed right. 

After the safety lecture, the guests were all given their bows and quivers, and told to line up in front of the two closest targets. James wondered briefly how Regulus would handle the bow, but quickly redirected his thoughts. He was here to help all of them, not just Regulus. 

James straightened and tried to focus more on Alice, who was showing proper bow form before letting the guests try. Lily went first, overshooting the target drastically. Peter followed and managed to get closer, and finally it was Regulus’s turn. 

When Regulus stepped up, James sucked in a breath as he brought the bow up and looked sternly down the arrow shaft. He looked to James like a Roman statue, some god of the hunt, proud and untenable. 

The arrow let loose with a whoosh, and smacked right into the target with an audible thunk. Alice clapped, and Regulus gave a slight bow, a tiny pleased smile on his lips. James realized his mouth was gapping when Regulus swung those silver eyes on him and smirked. His teeth snapped shut, and James had to stop a scowl from forming.

“It’s not fair, you’ve been doing skeet shooting for years,” Lily whined, seemingly upset at her lack of natural talent with a bow. 

“Actually, that usually doesn’t translate well to this, so you must have a gift for accuracy,” Alice said. “But let me help the rest of you, you’ll be hitting bullseyes before you know it.” She smiled encouragingly. 

The rest of archery passed quickly after that. James helped Peter mostly, and Alice took Lily. Regulus had free rein to try the differing targets. James definitely did not spend any of his time watching him out of the corner of his eye.

“This is pretty fun actually,” Peter said, as he finally hit the target on his last shot, earning an enthusiastic high-five from James. 

The hour had winded down quicker than he expected. Usually, these activities drained James, but he felt oddly invigorated, maybe because Peter wasn’t as irritating as the usual guests. He was actually pretty fun to be around, he had a knack for storytelling and was funnier than James would have expected. If he had to guess, he would say that Peter didn’t come from money like Regulus, Sirius, and Barty clearly did. He seemed too down to earth for that. 

“You would say that, since you finally got it,” Lily huffed, having unsuccessfully shot her final arrow. “I don’t know how you guys do this.” 

“Come on, Lil, there are plenty of things you’re good at that we aren’t,” Regulus laughed, knocking his shoulder into hers. She only glared back at him. 

“Everyone bring your bows and quivers to me.” Alice stood at the door of the shed. Everyone moved to bring back their equipment. James just stood off to the side, watching Lily playfully scowl at Regulus one final time before stomping ahead of him. They seemed to get along well, but he was thankful they weren’t overly affectionate in public. He couldn’t afford to feel more jealous than he already did. 

“Okay, follow me to our next station.” Alice resumed her mother duck position, guiding everyone to the next activity. James took up the back again, trying to not eavesdrop but immediately failing. 

“You were pretty impressive out there,” Lily said, smiling at Regulus, who turned his head away with a bashful look. “I didn’t know bows and arrows could be so hot.” Lily wagged her eyebrows. 

“Lily,” Regulus gasped. “Do you have an archery kink?”

“Oh, definitely. Nothing like a man arching his back while trying to shoot a bow.” 

James had to force himself to tune them out before he heard something that would make him sick. Couples were so disgusting. Luckily they weren’t too far from the next activity. Panning for gold seemed a bit silly, but most adults usually ended up having more fun doing it than they would initially expect.

“Really?” Regulus asked as he crossed his arms and looked decidedly unamused at the troughs of water. 

“Yes, it’s an authentic western experience.” Alice beamed, although she looked a bit worn. He didn’t know why she was out there with them, he could handle three guests on his own even if two was usually the limit. She always worked herself too hard. 

“How about I lead this one, Alice,” James offered, and she gave a grateful smile back, nodding. “Okay, let’s all gather around the troughs, give yourself some room to maneuver.” 

While the guests took their places, James got the bag of alluvial deposits and the sifters. He handed a sifter to each guest, trying not to linger longer on Regulus as his delicate, long fingers reached out to take the item from James’s waiting hands.  He didn’t think about the dream he’d had about those fingers and went back to the front of the troughs to give his spiel about gold panning.

“I’m sure most of you learned about the California Gold Rush while in school, and if you didn’t I’m going to give a brief history of the discovery of gold in North America. I hope y’all don’t mind.” James turned on his charm, which was easy when he was discussing something he enjoyed. They all looked on wide-eyed, and James stood a little straighter at how enraptured they appeared, especially Regulus. 

He went on about the first significant gold rush in North Carolina in 1799, and then moved on to the later gold rushes in the southern Applachians. Eventually ending the lesson with the gold rush that inspired worldwide interest in prospecting for gold, the California gold rush.

It all culminated in his favorite part, which was bringing the guests to a place of understanding, of why this fun little activity was actually a connection to the history of the country. It made it all feel more purposeful and less theatrical. Even in his moments of irritation, he wanted the guests to love this stuff as much as he did. 

“So while this might seem silly, it's actually a way for y'all to see a little bit of the excitement that miners would have felt discovering this.” James held up a good chunk of gold to show the guests. “That excitement would lead to California becoming a state but also to the decimation of native populations.

“We can’t gloss over the bad in favor of a rose-tinted view of the country,  it’s important we learn the full history or we’ll be doomed to repeat it.” James paused, realizing he was on his own tangent as he made eye contact with Alice who was giving him a look that screamed “rich people don’t want to be reminded of this.”

“Anyway, I suppose I'm getting a little philosophical.” James slipped the gold back in his pocket, giving Alice a conciliatory smile. “Let’s get back to the gold panning.” He gave a little laugh. 

“Why don’t y'all grab your sifters and hold it a little above the water, so I can pour in some of this.” James patted the bag of deposits. “Now, these are called alluvial deposits,” James began as he started pouring into Peter’s waiting shifter, “because it's the loose bits that a river leaves behind. It's made of gravel, clay, silt, really anything, but the important part is the minerals.” 

James finally reached Regulus, who watched him with curious eyes. It made James stumble a little, dumping the bag too quickly and almost knocking Regulus’s sifter out of his hand. He cleared his throat, and tried to continue his presentation. 

“Uh, as I was saying, this is where the gold is found and the way we find it is sifting it in the water. So, whenever you’re ready, slowly lower the sifter into the water, and give gentle swishes to make the dirt dissipate.” James nodded at them to begin. 

The guests started dipping their sifters in the water. He had to correct Lily, who was very aggressively swishing hers.

“It’s a slower movement or else your gold might end up back in the river where it came from.” James demonstrated, and Lily nodded. 

Peter was very focused on his, a deep furrow of concentration on his face that had James holding back a laugh. Regulus didn’t appear to be trying, having simply set his sifter in the water. 

James didn’t want to interact with him, but this was kind of his job, so with an inward sigh, James went to Regulus. 

“Do you need help?” 

“Not really, no. I was actually just trying to get you to come over here.” Regulus gave a smirk, making James feel lightheaded.

“You wanted me here?” 

“I wanted to say I enjoyed your speech.” Regulus had finally started gently moving his sifter, the water clouding with dirt.

“Oh.” James wanted to say something smart, but he felt caught off guard, like this was a trap closing in on him.

“Does everyone here have a passion for the history of the American frontier?” Regulus arched one of those dark, perfectly sculpted brows at James.

“Umm.” James was losing track of what was going on, why was his mind mush like he’d never had a conversation before? “I wouldn’t say so, no.”

Regulus looked about to speak again, when Peter shouted and started jumping around.

“I found some! I think, well, I don’t know. Will you tell me?” Peter said all this at such a rapid pace, James barely understood him. He went over to Peter, who was grinning wildly at his anticipated success.

Peter handed over a very small sliver of something that could definitely be gold. James took it gently and brought his hand up close to his face trying to decide.

“So?” Peter asked, barely able to contain himself. 

“Alice, how about you let me know?” James shouted over his shoulder to her. “She's better at this than me.”

Alice came over, took the little rock and declared that yes, it was gold. Everyone congratulated Peter, whose success drove Lily into a competitive frenzy that lasted to the end of the activity. James didn’t get another chance to talk to Regulus, but the image of that pleased smirk on his lips lingered in his head through the whole activity. 

After gold panning, the group went to try lassoing, which went as well as James expected. Regulus couldn’t figure out the motion, no matter how much Alice tried to explain. Peter managed to tangle himself up in the rope, and Lily questioned the ethics of roping cattle. 

“James, why don’t we end this with you showing how it’s done.” Alice gave James a tight smile. James gave a nod and took the lasso. He didn’t often do this, since this wasn’t a real working cattle ranch, but he and Remus often practiced as a fun time waster.

He swung the loop, throwing it out at the dummy cow and pulled tight. James couldn’t help a pleased smile that he always got when he did it right. He turned back to the group who were clapping. 

Regulus gave James an impressed look, which had James preening. He almost wanted to show off a little more, especially if it was going to make Regulus look at him like that. Lily looked equally impressed, which brought him right back down to reality. The man had a girlfriend, idiot, get it together. 

With the disastrous roping session done, the group broke for a light lunch, which was far too short for James’s taste. He wanted to go curl up in his room and stop obsessing over a stupid guy he couldn’t have. It was making James irritable and snappish. 

The last activity for the day was canoeing. The lake on the property was a good size, but not unmanageable for inexperienced people. James helped Alice pull the two canoes to the lake edge, throwing in the paddles before going to grab safety vests.

“Okay, everyone put on your vest and we’ll need to divide you up. It’s only three to a boat.” Alice gestured to James, who brought each person a vest. It was interesting to him to see these put together people in the bright safety orange looking like middle school campers.

“Peter and I will go with you, Alice if that’s alright.” Lily beamed at Alice, and shot a look to Peter that confused James. It almost looked conspiratorial, but he couldn’t figure out why.

“Of course. James, you take Regulus and try not to tip over.” Alice grinned at him, and James rolled his eyes, gesturing for Regulus to follow him to the canoe. 

“Have you ever been on a canoe?” James asked, as he grabbed a paddle, handing one to Regulus. 

“No, I'm not a big boat person.” James realized now Regulus looked a tad nervous. 

“Don’t worry. It’s easy. Just climb in and I’ll push us out.” 

Regulus gingerly climbed into the canoe, sitting primly and clutching his paddle. James pushed the canoe so it gently bobbed in the water, then he hopped in behind Regulus. 

“Okay, so I'll guide us out a bit, then you can take the left side. Sounds good?” James asked, Regulus gave a nod but still seemed pretty stiff.

James paddled out into the lake, and motioned Regulus to take up his side. They moved shakily around, going in a circle for a moment until James gently corrected Regulus. 

The other group could be heard laughing across the lake, but their canoe remained oddly silent. James watched Regulus’s shoulders slowly unstiffen as the time went on. It seemed he was starting to enjoy the activity. 

“This isn’t so bad.” Regulus said over his shoulder. James smiled though Regulus couldn’t see it.

“Yeah, the water can be very calming.” James had always found sitting by the lake peaceful. The sounds of the animals and the smells of nature made him feel calm.

“You seem really knowledgeable about all of this stuff,” Regulus said distantly. 

James paused before responding. “Well, yeah, it’s my job,” James responded with a slight laugh. “Were you expecting us to be incapable?” 

Regulus laughed softly. “I guess I expected you to be theater nerds.”

“No one here has ever done theater,” James said, irritation he didn’t quite understand growing with every word. “Why would you think that?” 

“Well, it’s all kind of a performance, isn’t it?” Regulus asked. 

“This is real shit. Just because you get to spend a stupid amount of money to play pretend on a ranch doesn’t mean this isn’t someone’s real life.”

Regulus turned to look at him over his shoulder, his eyebrows drawn together. “Isn’t that stupid amount of money the reason you have a job?” 

“Yes, but that doesn’t make me stupid.”

“When did I ever call you stupid?” Regulus asked. James barely heard him, and the feeling of frustration that had been building under his skin since that morning crested all at once. 

“You rich people always come here and act like you own the place, but you barely even respect the world around you.”

“How is spending time in nature disrespectful?”

“Because it’s all fake to you!” James said. “You’ll go back to your life and act like you’ve had some life changing weekend, when really you’ll just stay the same pompous ass you’ve always been.”

Regulus’s face twisted with anger. “Fuck you,” he said in a low voice. “You don’t know a damn thing about me.”

“I know you’re only using this trip to fuck with your friend and that makes you an asshole.”

Regulus gritted his teeth. “Take me back to shore.”

“What?” James asked. 

“Just take me back!” Regulus half-yelled. It was slightly shocking to hear a yell from the usually placid man. 

“Okay, no need to shout. Geez,” James growled back, paddling them towards shore. Regulus barely helped, and that only made James more annoyed. 

Regulus was getting frustrated, and he seemed to want to get out, not realizing that they were still not quite to shore. The canoe bobbed unevenly, threatening to tip.

“Hey, cut it out or you’ll—” James didn’t get to finish what he was saying before the canoe tipped over, plunging both of them into the water. 

James pushed the canoe upright and stood dripping, sending a glare at Regulus who was struggling to stand in the muddy bank. Both were drenched, covered in mud and grass. 

“What the fuck is your problem!” James hissed. He wanted to shout, but at the last moment he realized it wouldn’t help his case with Alice, who would definitely ask questions about why they ended up in the lake.

“What’s my problem? What’s your problem?” Regulus had managed to stand and now pointed an angry finger at James. James clenched his teeth about to step towards the other man, he wasn’t sure if he was going to punch him or do something even more foolish.

“Regulus! Oh my god, are you okay?” Lily came running, followed closely by Peter and Alice. She grabbed Regulus’s hand and helped him fully out of the lake.

“Yes I'm fine, let’s just go back to the rooms,” Regulus sighed, shooting another dark look at James. He watched the group trudge back to the cabins, unable to stop glaring at the back of Regulus’s head.

“James.” Alice had her arms crossed, looking decidedly displeased.

“It was my fault, Alice. I’m sorry.” James sighed, not wanting a lecture at this particular time. His clothes were rapidly cooling, and he could feel the denim of his jeans starting to rub uncomfortably on his legs.

“This is unacceptable. The guests trust us and you know how important their reviews are to future revenue.” 

“I know! I’m sorry. I was careless. I promise it won’t happen again.” James hated taking the blame for Regulus, that vile annoying man.

“I believe that, but I will need you to apologize to Mr. Black. Please try to smooth this over,” Alice sighed, nodding and running a hand through her hair. “Now, go get changed before you catch your death.” She smiled and gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder.

James nodded, and started heading back to his room. His mind couldn’t stop thinking of Regulus, which he blamed on his dripping wet clothes. God, James hated that guy. What an ass. Regulus probably didn’t even care that he could have cost James his job.

He was back at his room quickly, fueled by his simmering annoyance. James changed and flopped on his bed, reminded of the stupid way he started this day. How could he have ever been attracted to such a brat. 

Chapter 5

Regulus was not exactly an active person. He worked out, sure, but in the privacy of his own home where no one could see him. He’d been athletic as a teenager, but he always preferred solo sports, and that hadn’t changed as he’d gotten older. 

“Remind me again why you scheduled a morning hike,” Regulus complained. “And do not say it’s because Remus is going to be there because I already checked and he’s not.” 

He was still irritated from the day before. He wasn’t used to being spoken to with so much animosity and though he’d come here as a joke, that didn’t mean he deserved to be disrespected. Not that anyone else seemed to have much pity for him. He’d tried to complain about the situation to Barty last night but Barty had only given him a scathing look and left the room. He should have expected that. Lily just seemed flabbergasted, she kept making a face like she expected something completely different to happen. Regulus had no idea what, but he could see that she was confused. 

“Because hiking is good for you,” Sirius said primly, dragging Regulus back to the present. He sounded like their mother when he spoke like that. 

“Tell me the real reason,” Regulus begged. Sirius had dragged all of them out of bed this morning for the hike, having booked it right under Regulus’s nose. Regulus had already made all the plans for their trip and today was supposed to be a day of rest with a bit of dancing in the evening. He was still on vacation after all, even if he was supposed to be here to torture Barty. 

Now he was up at seven am preparing to scarf down breakfast just to go on a six mile hike through the wilderness. 

“Remus said that most people didn’t take advantage of the hikes,” Sirius said conspiratorially. Regulus was just relieved that he was finally being honest. “He made us all sound like useless rubes, so I told him that we were planning to go on the hike, because we love nature–”

“When was the last time you were out in nature?” Regulus grumbled. 

“Then he asked if I was sure I booked it because James never mentioned it so of course, I had to go and actually book it because it’s clear he’s going to check.”

“Have you ever worked this hard to get dick before?” Regulus wondered distantly. 

“Yes! Freshman year of college when I dyed my hair pink ‘cause that guy said he loved people with pink hair.”

“That guy was straight.”

“Not straight enough not to fuck me,” Sirius said smugly. 

“I really don’t think you should feel proud of that.”

“You’re just jealous.”

“Jealous of your ability to make yourself seem desperate for any moderately attractive tall man that walks past?” 

“Remus isn’t just moderately attractive,” Sirius corrected. Regulus hated that he agreed with him, but unfortunately he was right. Remus was more than moderately attractive, far more. God dammit. 

“All right, let’s go hiking,” Regulus agreed unhappily. 

“I knew you’d support me,” Sirius said happily. The most surprising part of Sirius’s asinine plan wasn’t that he’d woken Regulus up at an ungodly hour, it was that he somehow managed to convince Peter, Lily, and Barty to come along with them. Lily looked like she was the only one truly awake. Stupid morning people. 

Their breakfast was just as delicious as their dinner, a spread of sausage, bacon, eggs, toast, and fresh fruit so extravagant that it almost seemed like a waste having right before a huge hike. Regulus mourned his last cup of coffee when he finished drinking it, staring down at the empty mug with a frown. 

“Did your coffee wrong you?” Lily asked cheerfully. 

“No, it was perfect,” Regulus lamented. 

“Are we ready to hit the trails?” James asked suddenly. He hadn’t eaten breakfast with them, a fact that Regulus was relieved about. He looked just as handsome as he had been yesterday which was very unfortuante. Regulus had hoped that he would magically become unattractive if he just wished hard enough for it. 

“I suppose,” Barty drawled. He was still moping, though Regulus guessed it was mostly for dramatic effect now. He loved pretending like something was wrong when it wasn’t. Besides, Regulus shared a wall with Barty and he’d gotten a front row seat to the lewd phone call Barty and Evan had shared the night before. He knew that things were more than good between them, there was no reason for Barty to be acting like this beyond Regulus's further annoyance. 

“Great,” James said, smiling broadly, ignoring Barty’s mood as deftly as he had the day before. Regulus trailed after the group as they headed outside. He didn’t want to walk next to James —  if he could manage to avoid the man all day, he would count it as a success. 

They crossed the river that ran through the center of the ranch on their way to the trail, walking over a well made wooden bridge. It was perfectly crafted, not a board out of place, and Regulus, despite his longing for his bed, found himself appreciating the skill it must have taken to build such a thing. It was beautiful as well, the wood meshing flawlessly with the grounds of the ranch. 

“Remus and I put this piece together,” James said, his confident tone yanking Regulus from his musing. 

“Really?” Sirius gasped. He was standing next to James, stars in his eyes at the very mention of Remus. Regulus rolled his eyes. It had been a long time since he’d seen his brother act like this, and he couldn’t say that he missed it. He wondered if James was picking up on it. 

“Yeah! Remus designed it and then he and I collected the wood from a forest a few miles south of here. It’s all Douglas-fir, that’s why the live edges are so clean,” James said proudly. “Remus was the one who decided to use it. He’s always been better at those sorts of things.” There was an unmissable twinkle in his eyes as he spoke, a small smirk playing at his lips as he watched Sirius. 

Regulus looked away. Of course his brother would end up having way more fun on this trip than he did. 

He worked to tune out their conversation as they walked onto the trail, the path quickly narrowing between trees, leaving them in a single file line. It was a beautiful area, the trees so old and thick that he wouldn’t be able to wrap his arms around them even if he was reaching as far as he could. The sounds of the river, even when its view was blocked by the forest, settled something inside him, making him feel like he was floating down it. 

He almost felt a little annoyed that it was so peaceful, he wanted to hold onto his hurt and anger from yesterday a bit longer, but it was like the trees and the water were coaxing out all his problems and stealing them out from under him.  

The hike itself wasn’t very difficult, though as the day dragged on and the sun began to rise, Regulus found himself sweating more than usual. At one point, he stopped to grab water out of his backpack, and when he’d satiated his thirst he looked up to find that he’d been completely left behind, the rest of the group walking on without him. 

“Assholes,” he muttered. For a moment, he considered walking back. He would have the cabin to himself and he could finally make use of the hot tub that overlooked the rock formations behind the ranch. He groaned when he felt himself decide to keep walking. He couldn’t be that far from the lookout point, and he would surely catch up with the group quickly. 

Hiking alone wasn’t that different from hiking with the group, although he was spared the endless conversation happening between James, Sirius, and occasionally, Peter. Leave it to them to befriend the man who hated Regulus. 

He was muttering to himself angrily by the time the trees cleared, his irritation reemerging piece by piece. It wasn’t the lookout point James described, but he’d been walking for a while, so he must have taken a wrong turn. He was on the edge of the lake he’d fallen into yesterday, though he could see where the river fed into it and where the river continued on the other side. 

“Wow,” he breathed. Once again blown away by the colors of Wyoming. He hadn’t appreciated it enough the day before, too nervous about going out onto the lake in a canoe, but today it was like he couldn’t look away from the wide expanse of colors. It was almost hard to believe that he was seeing such a thing. The water glittered enticingly, reflecting the sun like a dancing star. The rock formations towered so high above him that his brain almost couldn’t comprehend what he was seeing. The trees and the changing leaves made tears prick at his eyes. 

He took a step forward, right to the edge of the water, and leaned down to brush his fingers through it. It was surprisingly temperate, the sun forcing out the October chill enough to warm the shallow water. 

It took less than a second for him to decide to go out into it. He was all alone, his group long gone, and he was covered in sweat, his clothes sticking to his skin in odd and uncomfortable places. He could afford to take a short swim. And besides, he needed to get yesterday’s experience out of his head. He might not have wanted to be in a boat, but he loved to swim and he rarely got to do it. 

He pulled off his jacket and shirt, folding them neatly and setting them on top of his bag. He shed his shoes, socks, and pants next, leaving him in only his boxer briefs. 

Hopefully no one was around to see him, he thought idly. He walked out into the water slowly, letting his body adjust to the temperature as he went, but it really wasn’t bad. Even when he came across a slightly colder section, it didn’t hurt him, if anything the moments of chill were a nice refresher from the sun’s heat. 

When he made it out deep enough to where his feet couldn’t touch, he rolled his legs up so he could float on his back. He hadn’t been swimming in a while and he’d forgotten how much he enjoyed the free floating feeling of the water. It was like everything inside of him settled into place like the eye of a storm, a momentary peace. 

The sun blazed against his face and he was sure he would be sunburnt later, but he didn’t care. 

Distantly, he thought of the argument he’d had with James yesterday. It had made his chest feel tight all night, but now in the peace of the water, it didn’t feel so pressing. In a few days, he would be back home and he would never have to think about James again. Unfortunately, that thought made his chest feel tight as well. It was like he couldn’t win either way. 

Why did it matter so much that James liked him? He was a random man who lived on the other side of the country from Regulus. Regulus had been disliked by attractive men before, he had been quite cutting in college, he knew how to make people squirm, but somehow this dislike felt different. It felt like it mattered more. 

For a moment, his thoughts drifted to the unfinished book sitting inside his laptop back at the cabin. He forced the thoughts away before they could drown him. He would write again, he knew he would, but sometimes when these long dry spells would happen, he would wonder if he’d lost his skill altogether. He always worried it would never come back to him. 

His ears were covered by the lake water so it took him a while to realize that someone was yelling at him. When he finally heard the muffled sound of someone shouting, he lifted his head slowly, keeping legs curled up against him as he used his arms to tread water. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust, the sunlight having blinded him, but when he blinked them clear, he saw the rest of his group near the shoreline. 

Peter was in the process of laying out on a rock, Barty was heading the opposite direction, right into the trees, while Lily and Sirius were in the process of shedding their clothes and jumping in after him. 

He was almost concerned for a moment, perhaps he wasn’t supposed to be swimming, but then he noticed James, his smile unnervingly bright in the sunlight. He looked like he was laughing pleasantly, and though Regulus had only met him two days ago, he thought he could perfectly hear that laugh in his ears. 

Sirius and Lily reached him quickly. Lily copied him immediately, laying out on her back in the water and closing her eyes. Sirius, the dickhead, swam right up to Regulus and tried to splash himRegulus directly in the face. Regulus dodged, but a bit still got into his eyes. He splashed Sirius back and back stroked away, kicking his legs extra hard so the water would keep Sirius at bay. 

He got far enough away that Sirius would have to work to reach him, and for a second, he thought he was safe. 

Regulus should have known better with how his luck was turning out on this trip. 

Sirius lowered himself into the water so that only his eyes were above the surface, then darted forward with a harsh kick of his legs. At the same time, James, who had still been on the shoreline a moment before, was now shirtless and heading into the water after them. It distracted Regulus enough that when Sirius’s splash hit him dead in the eyes, he lowered his legs for the first time to steady himself. 

He hadn’t realized the water a couple feet beneath him couldn’t be reached by the sun, that it would still be frigidly cold from the night's chill. The feel of it against his feet made him gasp just as his head sank beneath the surface, water instantly surging into his lungs. He fought to free himself from it, but it was inside him and though he tried to cough and remove the water, he couldn’t suck in anymore air because he couldn’t make his body get to the surface. 

His vision faded fast, within a few seconds, everything narrowing to a murky point as he flailed. 

Strong hands grasped him under his arms and dragged his head above the surface, but still he couldn’t clear his airways, his body shaking uncontrollably, his nails desperately digging into whoever was carrying him. 

When he landed on shore only seconds later, he coughed twice and then felt water surge up his esophagus and out of his mouth so violently that he felt like glass was tearing through him. He kept coughing through it, each time more painful than the last, before finally he collapsed to the side, just barely missing the puddle of water. 

He closed his eyes, panic still making his heart race, but he wasn’t allowed a moment to rest. 

“Are you okay?” It was James that asked it, his voice silky smooth against Regulus’s battered nerves. 

“Fine,” Regulus croaked, the first inkling of embarrassment creeping into his thoughts. He winked open one eye to look at James above him. He was blocking out the sun’s light, but Regulus didn’t mind. He much preferred this view. “I’m sorry,” Regulus said instantly. 

James frowned. “You’re sorry for drowning?” 

Regulus let his eyes slide closed again and nodded. “Yes,” he said. His throat hurt, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it. 

“Damn, I leave to piss and come back to Regulus laying on the shore looking like a drowned cat,” Barty said, his voice closer than Regulus wanted it to be. 

A violent shiver ran down his spine, the feeling making his ribs ache. “Can we please not mention drowning right now?” Regulus pleaded. 

“Why? Did you almost drown?” Barty asked. He was clearly grinning. 

“You’re a dickhead,” Regulus grumbled instead of answering. 

“Should have known. If you wanted mouth to mouth that badly, you know where my bed is,” Barty replied. 

“Ugh, Barty, you're about to get married.”

“Evan wouldn’t mind,”  Barty said. Regulus could practically see him shrugging. 

“Well, I mind,” Regulus groaned. “Go away. I’m dying.”

“You’re always dying,” Barty replied, but Regulus heard his footsteps as he walked down the shoreline away from them. 

James was quiet, but Regulus could still sense that he was still next to him. There was something about his presence, something warm and inviting. Regulus wanted to curl up inside it. Later, he was sure he’d be embarrassed by these thoughts, but as of now, his mind was too syrupy to care. 

“You two are really close,” James said finally. Regulus could hear him moving around slightly, presumably sitting rather than squatting uncomfortably. 

Regulus shrugged without opening his eyes. “He’s not as insane as he seems.” 

“If you say so,” James mumbled, then added, in a much quieter voice. “Did you and him ever–”

Regulus opened his eyes then, lifting his head just enough to make out James’s face. He was looking at Barty with discontent, but Regulus couldn’t be sure why. “A few times a while ago, before Barty met Evan.”

“Oh,” James said. Nervousness crept down Regulus’s spine. He hadn’t mentioned that Barty was engaged to a man before. He should have done so in a more public place, just to see how James would respond. They weren’t exactly alone now, but that didn’t mean James wouldn’t react badly if he was the sort to do so. 

“Is that a problem?” Regulus asked firmly. He learned that it was best not to sound scared. 

James’s head snapped around as he looked down at Regulus. “What?” he breathed. 

Regulus didn’t exactly want to repeat himself, and he felt like saying ‘Do you have a problem with gay men?’ was a bit too confrontational. He opted to wait James out and see how he responded. After a moment, James threw his hands up. 

“No, of course not,” James said. “You’re welcome to do whatever you want with whoever you want.”

“Okay,” Regulus said, slightly confused. 

“I mean, he’s–” he looked at Barty again. “He’s hot, or whatever. Not to my personal taste.” He turned back to Regulus. “Not that there's anything wrong with your taste. I mean, if you have any. No, wait, that sounds wrong. I just mean that I’m fine with you sleeping with… well, anyone. Unless they don’t want you to.” 

“Jesus Christ, James,” Regulus gasped, finally putting James out of his misery. “I was just asking if you were homophobic.”

“Oh!” James shouted. “No, I’m–” he gave a slightly self deprecating laugh. “No, I’m definitely not homophobic. Half the people who work at this ranch are queer.” His cheeks turned slightly pink as he added, “Me included.” 

Regulus wanted to say that was a relief. Not only did he not hate gay people, but he was interested in men himself! However, Regulus had nearly just drowned in front of him and then thrown up onto the ground before laying pathetically next to it. If Regulus ever had a chance, which was a big if , then he definitely didn’t now. 

“Is it weird for you though? That your girlfriend is on a bachelor party trip with someone you used to sleep with?” James asked curiously. 

Regulus’s eyebrows lifted. “My what?”

“Your girlfriend,” he said, pointing out toward the lake. “Lily, she’s your girlfriend.” 

Regulus let out an incredulous laugh. “Well, that’s certainly news to me.” 

“What?” James whispered. 

“I’m gay, James. I just said this, didn’t I?” 

“You said you slept with Barty, that doesn’t mean you’re gay. You could be bi.”

“Okay, but I’m not bi. I’m gay. Strictly gay. As is Lily, I might add, in case you were interested. She’s not going to want you.”

James looked more shocked than Regulus had ever seen him. “O-oh, okay,” he stuttered. 

Regulus shook his head but the movement made him dizzy and he had to rest his head back on the ground to keep from passing out. James was thankfully quiet while he sorted himself out. It didn’t take him long, but by the time the spinning stopped, the pains in his body were making him throb. 

He sighed under his breath and slowly started to stand. “I think I’ll head back to the cabin,” Regulus said plainly. He glanced out at the water and noticed Lily and Sirius in the middle of a deep conversation, their heads bent together like they were sharing secrets. Leave it to Sirius to nearly drown him and not even follow him out of the water. 

“I’ll go with you,” James said, standing quickly. 

“No need,” Regulus said quickly. “I promise not to do any more swimming. I think I should be able to make it back safely.” He didn’t give James a moment to respond, throwing on his pants and shirt, and heading down the trail away from him as quickly as his body would let him. 

Chapter 6

James watched Regulus walk away feeling dazed. Regulus was gay. Regulus was gay and not dating Lily. He was (presumably) single. And he’d almost died . That part should have made him feel more horrified, it must have been traumatizing, but all James could think–Jesus, he was a terrible person–was that he’d gotten to save Regulus. 

He kept thinking about how Regulus’s body felt pressed against his own. He was thin, but more muscular than James would have expected. He’d thought he’d feel bones pressing out at odd angles, but the flesh that curved under his fingertips was much more exciting. 

Distantly, he realized that he still hadn’t managed to apologize to Regulus for yesterday, as Alice had demanded he should, but it was a bit late for that now.  

“Where did Regulus go?” Sirius asked suddenly. James hadn’t heard him walk up, he hadn’t even heard the splash of water as Sirius left the lake. He’d been too busy watching the spot between the trees where Regulus had disappeared. 

James glanced up at Sirius, his striking appearance even sharper now that he was dripping wet. He wished he could snap a picture just to torture Remus with it. 

“Oh, um, he went back to the cabin,” James responded. 

Sirius was smiling, but his eyes were lined with tension. He swallowed harshly before asking, “Was he okay?”

James softened, his thoughts–lit on fire by Regulus’s presence–calmed into something gentler. “He’s fine,” James assured him. “He’ll probably be a little sore, but I think he’ll be okay.”

Sirius nodded once. “Right, okay,” he said softly, turning his back on James to look back out on the lake where Lily, Barty, and Peter were now swimming idly together. 

He wished Regulus was still with them, he felt an inexplicable sadness now that Regulus was gone. He could tell from the light pink on Regulus’s cheeks that he was embarrassed by what had happened, and for some reason, that bothered James. He wanted to leave the group and go find the man just so he could reassure him. He wanted to lie and tell him that people nearly drowned here all the time. Nearly dying wasn’t all that embarrassing, James had almost died a hundred times on his family’s farm growing up. Once, he’d singed his eyebrows off when he accidentally lit a shed on fire. 

On second thought, maybe that was embarrassing. 

He stayed on the shore while the rest of the guests finished swimming and when they were finally done, he led them back to the ranch with as much cheer as he could manage. Sirius was far less talkative than he had been on the way out there. 

Back at the ranch, he waved goodbye to the group and changed into fresh clothes after taking a shower long enough for the water to run cold. After he was clean, he went looking for Regulus. He tried to be nonchalant about it, pretending as if he was just moseying about the ranch aimlessly, but by the time he asked the same person three times if they’d seen Regulus, he knew he wasn’t fooling anyone. Dorcas was not amused. 

He tried to force himself to calm down. It wouldn’t do to look too eager for the other man’s attention. He loitered around the large living room, walked around outside by the pastures, and even detoured by the hot tubs, but while he ran into several other members of the bachelor party–Barty and Peter sneaking into the kitchens and Lily lingering on the bridge–Regulus was nowhere to be found.

James thought he might give up the pretense and simply ask one of the guests where Regulus was, but when he finally approached Sirius, who predictably was by the barn, it took one curious look from Remus to make him scurry back to his own room.

“Whatever,” James muttered to himself. 

He flopped down on his bed with a groan. He needed to clear his head; he didn’t know why that stupid guy was affecting him so much. James had never been one to go crazy over a crush, but all his stoic sensibility was vanishing with Regulus. Maybe he’d been spending too much time on the ranch, it had been a while since he made it out to town. 

“Stupid, yuppy with his hair and his… face,” James mumbled, barely registering that he was unzipping his pants, sliding them down his legs. He grabbed his cock, already half-hard, and gave a tentative yank.

He knew he would feel bad for once again touching himself while thinking about one of their clients, but James couldn’t help it. That sharp face and the way Regulus smiled– ugh , the man was infuriating. James pulled his hand away, spitting into it before bringing it back to run the fluid over his now completely erect cock.

James thought of the flash of Regulus’s grey eyes, the way they rolled in amusement at his friends. He wondered if he could make Regulus roll his eyes in other ways, more pleasurable ways. He moved his hand up and down his cock, thinking about the way Regulus’s body felt as James threw him over his shoulder–he’d been drowning, for God’s sake, James needed to get a grip. Before long he finished, come leaking out between the cracks in his fingers.

He fell back panting on his bed, giving himself a moment before he got up to clean himself off. James astutely avoided the mirror, not wanting to look at himself, feeling like a randy teenager and not at all like an adult man who knew how to keep his personal and professional life separate. 

“That’s the last time,” James mumbled to himself. “Pervert,” he chided for good measure, quickly changing his clothes for the second time today, and slinking out of his room. 

The ranch was far less empty when he made it back into the common areas; he'd almost forgotten that they were hosting a dance that night. 

There would be a local band, and a performance by a square-dancing group, then all the guests would be able to eat and dance at their leisure. The event was usually something they did for larger parties, usually companies that rented the ranch for team building, but Regulus had requested this in the booking. James knew now that it was likely because it would annoy Barty. 

He felt a sting of jealousy at the thought of Regulus going to such great lengths for someone. Barty was getting married, James reminded himself, although that didn’t stop the inappropriate feelings of possessiveness he experienced. 

Dorcas had everyone hanging decorations and placing table settings when James arrived. The ranch usually hired catering and event specialists to help with these more elaborate events, but because of the short notice and small group size, Dorcas had opted out of calling in reinforcements, except during the actual event. At least then there would be cleaning and waitstaff.

“We can handle most of it ourselves. Frank can cook for fifteen people easy, and you guys,” she pointed at Remus, James, Mary, Emmeline, and Marlene with an eccentric gleam, “will help decorate.” Dorcas concluded her speech with a sharp nod, which brokered no argument. 

James gave her a thumbs up with a grin which Dorcas thoroughly ignored.  He was just trying to be supportive, and maybe make up for his excessive questions earlier in the day, but Dorcas only narrowed her eyes and pointed toward a stack of decoration in the corner. James got to work immediately, arranging flowers in little baskets and smoothing out gingham tablecloths. The event gave a rustic, classy vibe, according to Dorcas, James thought personally it was all a bit kitschy, but what did he know about décor. 

All James wanted to do was sneak around again to find Regulus, but he probably wouldn’t see the other man until the dance. If Regulus even came to the dance. Usually, the staff didn’t attend, but Dorcas said they needed the numbers and Alice said this group seemed more interested in speaking to the staff than most groups did. 

“You mean Sirius requested that Remus attend,” James muttered. Alice raised an eyebrow. She wore a serious expression, but James could see her amusement. 

“He did?” Remus asked, a genuine smile on his face. James didn’t roll his eyes but it was a close thing. 

“You have a knack for decorating.” Marlene bumped James’s shoulder as she walked by with a box of more table settings. “Maybe you should take it up full time. You can’t cowboy for shit.”

“Like you can do better.” James threw a napkin in her direction, watching in disappointment as it fluttered helplessly in the air and drifted to the ground. 

“You missed,” Marlene laughed, sticking her tongue out. James picked up another decoration and got ready to toss it at her when Dorcas interrupted them.

“Stop acting like children!” she chastised.  

“That’s an impossible task for him,” Marlene said. James sent her a playful glare and went back to his work.

They finished getting the event room ready in under an hour, and James only had to freshen up before the dance. He put on some cologne and a nicer shirt, dusting off his jeans, and went back out to the main event space, grabbing his cowboy hat on the way out of his room. 

He met up with Remus right as he was coming out of his own room. He felt like he’d barely seen him since the bachelor party had arrived. Sirius was monopolizing most of Remus’s time. Remus was clearly freshly showered, the ends of his hair still slightly wet, and he was dressed in one of his nicer getups: a black shirt with silver threading and a dark pair of denim jeans that actually hugged his legs rather than the filthy, old jeans he typically wore. 

“You look nice,” James said, waggling his eyebrows as he looked Remus up and down. Remus frowned and looked down at himself as if he’d gotten dressed in the dark. 

“I’m wearing the same stuff I always do.”

James scoffed. “Uh, yeah, I guess you are.” He tried to contain his laughter at Remus’s obliviousness to his teasing. James probably needed to let Sirius know that unless he was absolutely direct with Remus, then nothing would amount from their flirtation. As charmed as Remus seemed to be, he wasn’t going to assume anything. James knew that better than anyone. 

He could already hear the music playing from the event as they approached the building. Remus paused at the door before opening it, giving James an “are you ready” look. James nodded, practically jumping to get in the building and see Regulus. He did his best to ignore the way his heart raced, sucking in a deep breath right as he entered. 

The smell of the buffet wafted through, making James's stomach rumble–he couldn’t remember the last time he’d eaten–but he ignored it for now, scanning the room for Regulus the moment he was able to. He spotted him quickly, he was already seated at one of the tables next to Sirius. Neither of them were speaking but they were looking at each other like they were mid-argument but knew better than to air it out in public. 

Sirius, as if called by a sixth sense, looked up the moment Remus stepped forward. He grinned, lifting a hand in a wave and beckoned them over. Regulus’s face cleared. James felt his feet stutter beneath him, but he recovered quickly, walking with Remus across the dance hall to where the brothers sat. 

“Remus, sit next to me.” Sirius patted the chair by him. The tables were grouped in seats of four, so that meant James ended up seated between Regulus and Remus. James smiled with all the confidence he could muster as he sat next to Regulus, aiming his chair toward the man. Remus was already in deep conversation with a very enamored looking Sirius.

“Hey,” James said, “I was hoping to see you tonight. You ran off so fast after the hike.” Don’t mention the drowning , he thought. 

“Oh, were you expecting me not to show? I am the best man, you know.” Regulus gave James an amused look. James, in his worried thoughts, had expected Regulus not to show. He’d barely admitted that to himself though. It would have been far too disappointing. 

“Well, you did almost drown today.” James closed his eyes in disappointment. The words had left his mouth before he could remember not to say them. 

Regulus, God bless him, freed James from his shame by snorting with laughter. “Funny enough I actually remember that happening, but thank you for the reminder.”

“I’m sorry,” James said. “For bringing it up and for dumping you in the lake yesterday.”

“I think you’ve made up for it,” Regulus said kindly, “but I appreciate the apology.” His smile turned into a smirk, his eyes twinkling. “Do you want me to tell your boss you were a good little employee and apologized?” 

James felt his face heat. “Uh, yeah, well I–” Before James could finish, Alice stepped up to the mic and tapped it once to get everyone’s attention.  

“Welcome to the Saturday night soirée.” Alice clapped her hands. “We’re so thankful you’re all here to enjoy this with us. Since Deerwolf Ranch opened, our dance hall has seen hundreds of these events, and at every single one, we make an effort to not just entertain you, but introduce you to our cowboy culture here. Our local band, the Weird Sisters, has been a staple of these events for years.” 

She gestured to the band behind her. The Weird Sisters had once been a group of young men, but all of them had moved away at one point or another for school or to pursue a bigger career. One by one each position was replaced with one of the older locals until eventually it was an entirely new group. Albus and Abertforth Dumbledore, a pair of brothers who ran a bar downtown, their sister, Ariana, who worked as a nurse, and Gellert Grindelwald, Albus’s not-so-secret lover, all stepped forward to wave at everyone. They were all grey and wrinkly, but James thought it added a comforting element to their events. 

People seemed more willing to dance to music played by this group, James thought it was because they all felt less judged. 

“Before we let you guys loose on the dance floor,” Alice said, winking at Barty and Lily who were sitting at a table nearby, “we’re going to have a performance by our very own square dancing group! Please welcome Do-Si-Doers.” 

The square dance group came out from behind the tiny stage. It was a weird group with ages ranging from the teens to late-fifties. Among them was Severus Snape, the boutique owner they purchased bath products from. He was a weird and off-putting man, yet he could square dance better than anyone James had ever met. 

James rolled his eyes as the group, and Severus , greeted the crowd. The music started just a second later and the group began to dance, their well practiced square dancing eye-catching despite the unusual mix of people. It might have seemed lame to some, but James was always impressed by the synchrony and precision of the dance.

The dancers twirled through several songs. Regulus watched in silence, a look of polite interest on his face that made James wonder if he was really bored out of his mind. Sirius kept leaning over to comment on the dancers to Remus who was smiling through the whole thing. Barty, Lily, and Peter seemed the most interested, cheering loudly and clapping at every lull. 

When they were on their last dance, James spotted Frank opening the food containers on a buffet table. It was a massive spread, especially for such a small group, but he wasn’t complaining. Getting to eat alongside the guests tonight was a treat. 

Right after the square dancers took a bow, Alice took the stage and encouraged everyone to eat up. No one needed to be told twice, even Regulus was up on his feet the moment she was finished speaking. The buffet table was lined with chili, grilled sausages, two stacks of B.B.Q. sliders, grilled corn, fried okra, mac and cheese, and cowboy beans. At the end of the table was Frank’s famous cornbread, cooked in a skillet and topped with a thin layer of extra sharp cheddar. 

“You outdid yourself tonight, Frank,” Remus said as they passed him. James agreed heartily. 

As they settled down to eat, country music filled the hall from an old stereo in the corner, the band taking a quick break to eat with them before they went back to work and played until the guests were too exhausted to continue. 

“I swear the food here is better than anything I can find in D.C.,” Regulus said with a groan. 

“Seriously,” Sirius agreed. “I think we’ve been robbed of good food there.” 

“D.C. doesn’t have good food?” Remus asked curiously. 

Regulus shrugged. “It’s okay,” he said. “But it’s mostly fast casual chains and overpriced dinners meant to impress politicians.” 

James chuckled. “What kind of food impresses politicians?”

“The kind with ironic names and not enough butter.”

Sirius snorted. “Father’s favorite,” he said. Regulus grinned back at him. 

“You call your dad Father?” Remus asked. 

Sirius looked a bit awkward as he said, “Yeah, but that’s weird, isn’t it? Most people don’t do that.”

“Our family is very formal,” Regulus said. 

“I could have guessed that,” James said. 

Regulus gave him a sly look. His eyelashes looked unreasonably long and James found himself staring at them, unable to look away. When Regulus finally released him and looked back at his food, James snapped his mouth closed and looked away just to find Sirius watching him with a knowing look. 

As they approached the end of their meal, Alice retook the stage. “All right, it’s your turn now. Time to try out your dancing boots!” 

The moment the Weird Sisters started playing, Sirius was tugging on Remus’s hand, dragging an indulgent looking Remus out onto the dancefloor. Peter and Lily followed instantly, both of them looking half-drunk as they twirled onto the floor. Barty looked far more drunk, but he cheered loudly as he watched Lily and Peter. 

The remaining staff joined them on the floor, they had to make the space feel more full than it was. Half of the square dancing group even came out to participate. Besides Barty, who seemed to be thoroughly enjoying himself regardless, James and Regulus were the only ones still sitting. 

James, to his intense mortification, felt butterflies flutter in his stomach as he looked over at Regulus. He was watching his friends with a fond expression. James took a deep breath to steady himself. 

“How ‘bout a dance?” he asked, holding out his hand expectantly. He hoped that Regulus wouldn’t reject him, because he already felt the eyes of some of the other dance attendees on them. Regulus tilted his head thoughtfully, and then gave a very dignified shrug, a small smile on his full lips. He took James’s hand. James could have fainted. 

He led them onto the dance floor, pulled Regulus against him, and started moving to the rhythm of the music. He wasn’t the best dancer, but he’d gotten better over the years. Regulus moved with a silky ease, responding to each of James’s moves with a move of his own. 

“I imagine you did a lot of dance lessons. That seems like a rich person activity.” James instilled lightness to the jab, hoping Regulus wouldn’t be offended. Regulus laughed softly. He was so close that James could feel his breath right against his ear. 

“Yes, I did. They were a part of the etiquette classes that we took.” Regulus smirked at James in a way that made it clear he knew James was making fun of him.

“Well, I only learned to dance in a barn, so hopefully you’re not too offended.” James took the opportunity to spin Regulus out, making the other man give a startled yelp. He laughed as he pulled Regulus back to him. Regulus tried to scowl but only managed a vaguely annoyed expression. 

They moved through the rest of the song, and then the next, but when the third song came on Regulus begged off. James had barely noticed the time passed, too lost in the feel of Regulus in his arms. 

“This might be shocking but I am not so used to all this physical activity. The hike this morning made my calves hurt.” Regulus almost appeared flustered by his admission.

“Oh, I wouldn’t have guessed that.” James eyed Regulus up and down as they walked off the dance floor, “You seem very fit to me. I bet you could go for hours.” He knew he was laying the flirting on thick, but the dancing had spun his critical thinking ability into a swirl and he no longer had full control over the words leaving his mouth. 

Regulus’s eyes widened imperceptibly if James had not been watching his face he’d have missed it. James wondered what he could say or do to really shock the passivity out of Regulus’s face. He wanted to see the man blush, he wanted to see his face go bright red. 

“Maybe after a good night’s sleep,” Regulus replied primly. After that, they sat at the table having a few drinks, laughing and talking. Every once in a while some of the party guests would come by, but for the most part it was just Regulus and James.

James barely realized the time until the band announced the last song. The few hours had flown by with Regulus. Regulus stood slowly, setting his half finished drink onto the table and glancing around at his friends. 

Remus and Sirius were sitting right next to each other at a table on the other side of the room. Sirius had his arm on Remus’s chest and Remus, glassy eyed from the beer he’d been drinking most of the evening, was smiling lazily at Sirius. They looked like they were seconds away from kissing. Barty had finally given in and had been dancing with Peter for the last few songs, Dorcas and Marlene were dancing with them, all four of them laughing about something Peter was saying. 

Lily was nowhere to be seen. 

“Can I walk you back to your room?” James asked, his voice sounding oddly high pitched to his ear.

“That would be nice,” Regulus turned to look at him and smiled, “But I think I have to do my best man duties and round up our party before I go to my own room.” James forgot sometimes that Regulus wasn’t just here for him.

“Right, well I’ll see you tomorrow. For the trail ride.”

“Yes, the trail ride.” Regulus gave a little snort. James gave Regulus one last smile and wave before he walked back to his own bedroom, thinking about those cool grey eyes the whole time.

𐚁

Regulus stumbled into the cabin on aching legs. Every muscle in his body felt strained from dancing for so long. Even his cheeks hurt from smiling. Honestly, who was he? He’d never danced like that before. He didn’t even know he could. 

But then there was James, charming and loose in a way Regulus craved to be, pulling him into the dance floor and spinning him endlessly. He was still caught in the movements, lost in the sway, as he leaned back against the front door, a soft sigh leaving his lips. He’d left James to gather up the rest of his party, but he couldn’t find Lily anywhere in the dance hall. 

He’d sent Peter back to his room with a shooing hand. Peter was on his way to blackout drunk when Regulus found him sitting surrounded by four half-finished drinks. He gave Regulus a sloppy, tilted smile as he left. Regulus guessed Peter would be passed out by the time he made it back to the cabin.

Sirius was still yammering on to Remus, tucked away in a corner of the room, and when Regulus interrupted, he could tell that Sirius was disappointed. Especially after Remus confessed that he was exhausted and all but ran from the room. 

Sirius grumbled unhappily the entire walk back to the cabin, but Regulus was too lost in his mind to listen to him. 

“You’re chipper,” Barty said to Regulus as they pushed open the door. The cabin was completely dark, but Barty was still able to stumble forward and collapse on the couch without turning the light on. “And you look miserable,” he said to Sirius. 

Sirius stepped forward and turned on one of the lights. “So what?” 

Barty shrugged. He looked sluggish like he’d had too much drink but was still fighting the sleep that was begging to claim him. 

“I don’t know, why do you look like someone shit in your oatmeal?” 

Regulus snickered. He already knew the answer. “Because Remus didn’t invite Sirius back to his room.” 

Sirius’s outraged face dropped into a pout. “I don’t get it,” he said. 

“Maybe he thinks you’re ugly,” Barty said unhelpfully. 

“No, that’s not it,” Sirius mumbled. Regulus rolled his eyes. 

“It’s possible that he just doesn’t like you like that.”

“Maybe he’s straight,” Barty added. 

Sirius groaned. “If he’s straight, I’m literally going to kill myself.”

“I can’t wait,” Barty responded. Sirius shot Barty a dirty look then stomped off toward his bedroom. Regulus watched him go impassively before dropping down on the couch next to Barty. 

“Want me to turn the light back off?” 

“No,” Barty said. “I just have a headache. I tried to call Evan on the walk back here and he didn’t answer.” Regulus’s eyebrows furrowed, he hadn’t noticed Barty doing that while they were heading back. He was too focused on James. 

“He’s probably drunk,” Regulus said honestly. “Or Pandora took his phone.” 

“Ugh, she loves doing that.”

“She loves torturing you.”

“You all do,” Barty said irritatedly. 

“Yeah, well, you make it so easy.”

Barty blew out an angry breath. “What had you smiling like that?”

“Nothing,” Regulus said dismissively. 

“Really?” Barty quirked an eyebrow. “Nothing at all?”

“Nothing that matters.”

“You’re so difficult,” Barty said.

“ I’m difficult?” 

“Yes. You make getting information out of you seem like robbing a bank. I swear talking to you is like pulling teeth.”

“Don’t be bitter just ‘cause I don’t rattle on about my problems like you do.”

Barty gasped in fake offense. “You take that back. You know you love listening to me complain.”

Regulus sighed. “I wish that wasn’t true, but you’re much more entertaining when you’re miserable. The last time I saw you happy you nearly lit a car on fire.”

“It’s important to have hobbies.” Barty finished the sentence with a drag of the word, his eyes already drifting back to this cell phone on the coffee table in front of them. 

“Don’t call Evan again. He’s not out there cheating on you.”

“I know,” Barty said. “He could be dead though. Dead people can’t answer cell phones.”

“I think you should get therapy.”

Barty snickered. “I’m never doing that.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Regulus said, snatching Barty’s phone off the table the moment Barty went to reach for it. 

“Hey!” Barty called. 

“Come on, it’s your bachelor party. We should be doing something fun.”

“There isn’t anything fun to do here,” Barty complained. 

“We could get drunk in the hot tub?” 

“Are you trying to seduce me?” Barty asked with a raised eyebrow. 

“If I was trying to seduce you, you’d know.”

“Because you’d be tripping over all your words and pretending to drown in the lake so I’d come save you in my big strong arms.”

Regulus flushed despite himself. “Yes,” he responded. “Exactly.” Best to brush off the mocking, otherwise Barty would never let it go. “Now get your swim trunks on and let's get in the hot tub.”

“I didn’t bring swim trunks,” Barty muttered as Regulus stood. “I’m getting in naked.”

“Fine,” Regulus said over his shoulder. He threw Barty’s phone onto the couch, ensuring that Barty didn’t go to grab it as they headed toward the back porch doors. The blinds were drawn over the windows, but Regulus could just barely see the evidence of lights peeking in through the slats. Someone must have left the light on earlier. 

When he opened the door, both he and Barty stopped in their tracks. 

In the hot tub was Lily–he should have guessed, she wouldn’t have vanished just to head to bed–with one of the housekeepers. Their tongues tied together as their bodies were pressed up against each other. 

“Lily!” Regulus gasped accidentally. Lily pulled back just enough to look at him, the curly haired woman moving to bite down her neck. 

“What?” 

“You whore, how dare you get laid when I can’t even get–” Sirius’s voice came flying from somewhere behind them. He must have come back out of his room at some point while they were heading toward the porch. Barty was shaking with laughter, as was Lily. 

“Don’t be jealous, Sirius!” she interrupted, grabbing the other woman by the back of her head and dragging her lips back up to meet hers. 

“Are we just going to stand here and watch?” Barty asked, finally shaking Regulus out of his shock. He slammed the door, turning to see a sullen Sirius and entertained Barty. 

“Let’s get blackout,” Regulus huffed. He wouldn’t be able to get that image out of his head for a while. 

Chapter 7

The next morning, the ranch was alight with excitement preceding the overnight trail ride. 

It was the highlight of most guests’ trips, although James thought it was likely that it was more a punishment for Barty than something everyone was excited for. Sirius was probably the only one looking forward to it, since Remus would be accompanying them.

James felt like every part of his body was buzzing with energy, he could feel his excitement down to his toes that morning. He wasn’t always a fan of the overnight rides, not with how much work they required and how restless guests usually got when they were faced with a long night in the wilderness, but this time he was looking forward to it. 

An entire night with Regulus? Perfect. 

He went down to the barn first thing after leaving his room to help Remus with the horses. They had an early start so Remus had already been out working for at least half an hour by the time he made it down there. 

They had to check each horse over before taking them off the ranch and then ensure that the saddlebags would be packed with appropriate weight distribution. Each horse had its own custom saddle, harness, and bags with their names on them. Remus had insisted that was necessary when he’d started here. It did add a certain luxury to spending hours on horseback.

Remus already had a question halfway out of his mouth when James showed up, as if he expected him to round the corner at any moment. Remus always asked James questions about which items to pack, even though James knew Remus had already settled everything days before. 

“Which color blanket do you think Blaise should have?” Remus was holding up some traditional saddle blankets next to the horse, one a deep red and the other with green and blue patched together with sturdy threading.

“Uh, red,” James replied, absentmindedly, as he started scrubbing leather shine into one of the saddles, the name Luna emblazoned on the side.

“He’s a chestnut, James. It was a trick question because I feel like you’re not paying attention,” Remus said with a sigh, exasperated as he gently laid the green and blue blanket on the back of Blaise.

James looked over and had to admit that red would have faded into her coat, and the blanket Remus chose popped nicely in contrast. Remus looked over at James expectantly. 

“Well, are you going to tell me why you’re so in your head?”

He’d just shown up, how had Remus read him that quickly?

“I’m not in my head! I’m just focused on shining the tack.”

“Right,” Remus drew the word out sarcastically. James threw his hands up, dropping the brush he’d been using.

“Fine! I like that guy, Regulus.”

“The one you said you hated two days ago? I think you said something specifically about him being the rudest, most annoying person you’d ever met.”

“Well, I changed my mind, all right?”

“So, why are you acting all Space Cadet about it?” Remus had moved on to the next horse, brushing its coat to an impossible shine.

“I want him to enjoy the trip, and maybe want to, I don’t know—” James cut off, shrugging almost shyly. Remus didn’t even look up. He nodded sagely, pondering James’s words. 

“Just be yourself. He seems to like you too, so I wouldn’t stress.” 

That was easy for Remus to say, the person that still hadn’t realized he was being flirted with for the last few days. But then again, James knew he was probably right, Remus had an uncanny knack for being great at giving relationship advice, even though he never seemed to find himself in any social situations outside of a barn.

Regulus did seem to like him, at least a little bit, and James had been nothing but himself these last few days, painfully so. 

As he helped Remus finish up with the horses, James couldn't stop thinking about how he could get a moment with Regulus alone. The trail ride was a full group activity. They would eat together, sit around the fire together, and even sleep together. Each tent would hold groups of  two or three. Plus James and Regulus would not be together, since it would obviously be strange to pair guests and staff. If the choice had been allowed, James was sure Sirius would have gotten himself in a tent with Remus.

So how would he get a moment, not in front of the whole party, to see if Regulus might want to—well, James wasn't sure what he would actually ask. Hey, do you want to make out behind a tree in the dark? Or maybe, James would ask to visit D.C. Like a tit-for-tat thing. Then, he could charm Regulus with his lack of city knowledge. Now that could work. If it wasn’t too forward… It was probably too forward. 

Throughout packing and checking the supplies, James thought about Regulus. Helping Remus with the horses and going over the route they would take, he wondered if Regulus liked horses at all. Even when James had to look at the forecast to ensure the weather would stay good, he wondered what kind of temperature was Regulus’s favorite. James felt lucky that the whole ride didn't depend on him because he was honestly starting to feel a little insane with how distracted he was.

It was lucky he had so much to do before the trail ride or he probably would have been pacing in his room for hours alone. The ride was set to commence around three in the afternoon. It seemed late, but since they didn’t take the guests too far they didn’t want to spend too much time riding before they had to set up camp. Besides, the point was mostly for the experience of camping outdoors, pretending to be cowboys, so it was adequate time before dark to reach the usual campsite.

They’d tried to have all day rides and camping before but they’d had so many incidents that Alice had restricted the times. 

Once James finished up his final pre-trail meeting with Alice and Marlene, he went out to where the horses were waiting. Remus had already helped Sirius up on his horse—that was a guess, but given how flushed Sirius’s face was, James thought it was probably a good one—and now was in the process of getting Barty in the saddle. 

James didn’t think he’d ever seen a guest look that petulant while getting on a horse. He was looking at his horse with a frown as if the horse was calling him names. 

The other members of the party seemed to have managed for themselves, except Regulus, who was watching his horse, Luna, a little warily.

“Do you need some help?” James asked, coming up behind Regulus. 

Regulus’s hair was still wet from a shower, his curls dripping slightly as he glanced uncertainly up at James. He was wearing a pair of denim that hugged his legs so perfectly they must have been professionally tailored. He frowned and looked back at the horse. 

“I’ve ridden one before,” he said. 

“Oh, yeah? Did you take lessons as a kid?” James asked. 

Regulus’s frown deepened, the muscle in his cheek twitching slightly. “Something like that,” he muttered. 

“It’s really easy. Don’t worry.” James said, trying for reassuring, but Regulus didn’t seem consoled. “I can help you.”

Regulus took a deep breath and released his arms from where he had them crossed. “I can manage.” He stepped toward Luna confidently, but James stayed close, just in case he needed help. To James’s surprise, he managed to pull himself up without struggling, as if he’d been holed up in his cabin watching instructional videos on how to mount a horse. 

James very carefully did not think about him throwing his leg over anything else. He gave Regulus a wide smile and thumbs up before heading to his own horse. 

𐚁

An hour or two later, the group was plodding along, James bringing up the rear with Regulus. Remus usually ended up at the back, but Sirius’s insistence on being first meant that Remus was dragged up near the front. Marlene took the middle area, and the horses naturally spaced out into a fairly even line.

Lily and Peter were in front of her and Barty was behind, just a few paces in front of James and Regulus. 

James, stupidly, hadn’t said a single word in at least half an hour. He kept thinking about things he might say to Regulus. He knew the other man was tense on the horse, it was obvious with how straight his back was, but James didn’t know how to soothe him. James hadn’t been afraid to be on a horse ever, he practically grew up on a saddle. He imagined that this might be one of the first times Regulus had ever ridden.

“I take it you weren’t a rich equestrian?” James trotted forward so their horses were side-by-side.

“I tried once, but it wasn’t my thing. Besides, it’s hard to be a great equestrian in the city limits.”

“Oh, yeah. Imagine trotting your horse down to the White House.”

Regulus gave that little snort again that sent James’s heart fluttering. “They actually do have horses at the Mall, but only the police can ride them.” 

“That always felt wrong to me,” James replied. “Horses are free spirits, they’re not meant to be cops.” 

Regulus looked at him out of the corner of his eye. “I have to agree with you,” he said. “Besides, I couldn’t imagine trying to chase down someone while riding one of these. Then again, I don’t know how to lasso.”

James chuckled. “I could teach you, if I had more time.” 

Regulus lifted one eyebrow, but he didn’t look offended. He seemed intrigued. 

James nearly blurted out an invitation for Regulus to come back–free of charge. He had to bite his tongue to keep it in. It wasn’t the right time. Not yet. After a beat of silence, Regulus spoke. 

“What’s your favorite thing about riding horses?” 

James knew it was stupid, to be this charmed by Regulus asking him a simple question, but he felt himself grow giddy before he even started to answer. 

Closer to evening, when the sun was starting to sink down beyond the horizon, James and Regulus had fallen back into a companionable silence. Remus had gone ahead with Sirius and Barty, and Marlene was busy chatting with Lily and Peter, though they were farther up than James had originally realized. He and Regulus were lagging behind a bit. It didn’t matter all that much though, James knew this area like the back of his hand, and it’d been an overall calm day so far. 

As if he’d jinxed it, the moment he thought that, it all went to shit. James hadn’t realized he’d pulled slightly ahead of Regulus, his enjoyment of the sunset and the calm of riding having lulled him. He’d almost imagined he and Regulus were having a nice ride just the two of them, and the fantasy had obviously made him lose his focus.

He turned his head, noticed that Regulus was not quite next to him, and twisted around to try to call Regulus’s horse forward. Right as he did that, Luna spotted something on the ground, likely a snake slithering in the grass. The horse reared, Regulus eyes going wide as he clutched the reins, and then Luna bolted to the left, right off the trail. 

James shouted in surprise, then turned his horse and raced after them. 

Luna was moving at a breakneck speed, James could barely keep up. It took him a while to catch up, his horse pulling up alongside Luna and Regulus. 

Regulus looked like he might puke. He was clutching so hard to the horse, so as not to fall off, his knuckles turning white as he fought to stay balanced. James neared the fleeing horse from the side, trying to calm Luna, and reassure Regulus at the same time.

He needed to grab the reins, to stop Luna from bolting any farther, but it was not as easy as the movies showed. James wished he had his lasso, although he wasn’t sure he was good enough with one to rope just the horse and not Regulus too. He was just lucky enough his brain didn’t decide to supply images of Regulus tied up in a lasso just then. His focus was paramount. 

“Regulus,” James shouted. Regulus turned his head, fear in his eyes, “You need to pull the reins, and calm your horse. You can do it.”

Regulus's hands shook as he looked down at the reins, and James nodded encouragingly as he pulled on them uncertainty. It took a moment, but then Luna whinnied and started to slow. She tossed her head and started trying to rear again as she trotted to a stop. James rode in front of them and slid off his own horse to soothe Luna. 

“It’s okay, girl. Shhh.” The horse pawed at the ground, huffing and breathing heavily. James patted her flank, and then looked up at Regulus, whose fingers were completely white where they clutched onto the reins.

“Here let me help you down,” James said. He reached up, and Regulus allowed James to help him down, leaning into his hands and slowly releasing the reins. 

Despite the danger they’d just been in, James couldn’t deny that he liked the feel of Regulus’s waist in his grip, and when Regulus’s feet were on the ground, James found them standing closer than they’d ever been. It sent a little thrill through his heart.

“You all right?” James whispered, squeezing Regulus a little closer.  Regulus nodded, shakily, then seemed to return to himself. He stepped away, James’s hands dropping to his sides. Regulus straightened his posture and brushed off his clothes. 

“And this is why I was never into horses,” Regulus scoffed. It came out slightly quivering. James gave him a smile, moving to grab Luna’s reins, and then to get his own horse. “Where are we?” 

James looked around, they were a fair bit off course, but the sun was almost completely set now. He was pretty sure he knew where they were, but they could end up lost if they tried to get back to the trail. 

“That’s a good question,” James muttered. “I think we should make camp around here. I’d say we put ourselves at least a mile off course.”

“A mile! But,” Regulus sputtered, “we couldn’t have gone that far. Surely, it would be better to go back to the others.” Regulus looked around the area panicked, too frantic to notice that they had no view of the rest of the party.

“No, it’s getting dark. It’s best not to ride at night. Don’t worry. We have protocols for this. Although, I’m not sure it’s ever happened before,” James mused, leading the horses behind him. He scouted around for a good place to pitch a tent. It was fairly flat ground here, but he didn’t want to sleep on buried rock.

“But—” Regulus was still looking around a little dazed. “You’re just a worker.”

James turned now from looking for a place to pitch the tent and gave Regulus a confused look. “Yeah,” James drew the word out, eyebrows raised in mild amusement. He couldn’t decide if he thought Regulus would say something disparaging or complain about being alone with James. He was definitely not expecting the words that came out.

“You don’t know anything about this.” Regulus waved his arms, gesturing at the lack of civilization.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that you’re not a real cowboy. It’s all just for show.” Regulus gave James a pointed look.

James couldn’t help himself, he burst out laughing. He laughed so hard he hunched over clutching his ribs, only barely remembering not to drop the reins clutched in his hands. When he finally looked up, Regulus looked decidedly unamused.

“Fine, laugh all you like while we die out here like it’s the Oregon Trail,” Regulus huffed, crossing his arms.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to laugh, it’s just that I do actually know what I’m doing.” James grinned at Regulus, who still appeared sullen. “I grew up on a farm. I have my degree in agricultural science. Besides, Alice wouldn’t hire anyone who doesn’t know how to survive out here.”

Regulus dropped his arms and looked a little sheepish. “I guess we don’t know a lot about each other yet.”

“No, we don’t.” James smiled and looked around, deciding this was as good a place as any to pitch their tent. “Here, can you hold the horses while I make a picket line?” 

James offered the reins to Regulus, who gave an imperceptible shake of his head, holding his hands up in refusal. 

“No way, they’ll smell my fear and bolt.” 

“It’ll be fine. These are trail horses. They’re bombproof.” James had to bite his lip from laughing again. Regulus scowled, gently taking the reins as if they might bite. 

“Well, that bombproofing didn’t work against whatever had my horse running off earlier.” 

“Yeah, well a snake is something a horse needs to be afraid of. You wouldn’t know the amount of animals that have to be put down because of venomous snake bites.” James sighed, untying the rope from his saddle and walking over to two sturdy looking trees. He slung the rope around one, and then looped it around the other securing it with a knot. 

He tested it and felt satisfied it would hold for the night. James turned and saw Regulus watching him with a peculiar look. 

“What?” James raised an eyebrow.

“Um, nothing.” Regulus cleared his throat, his cheeks turning a slight pinkish color, “here.” He thrust the reins at James, who took them to lead the horses over to the picket line. 

As James stood by the line, he dropped the reins to remove each of the horse's saddles. Both horses were completely unfazed by having free reign.

“Wait, you could have dropped the reins whenever?” Regulus asked, crossing his arms in a little pout that James found endearing. 

“It’s fun to watch you squirm.” James smirked, making that pink flush rise on Regulus’s cheeks again. His chest warmed at the sight of it. He set the final saddle down near a tree. Then went back to tie the horses up and set out some water for each of them. 

He went to the saddles after, and began rifling through it looking for the tent. The saddlebags held a lot more than they looked like, but it wasn’t hard to find the brilliant blue polyester and the tent pulls.

He pulled it out, swishing it into the air to open it up. It was a 2 person tent, but it wasn’t exactly a mansion, so James hoped Regulus wasn’t going to get all puritan on him. It was going to be a cozy night. 

James laid out the canvas, working to get the sticks straightened and pushed through each flap. Regulus watched him curiously, and it made James want to show off, which was hard to do when making a prefabricated tent. It didn’t exactly take a rocket scientist.

“I can’t believe you agreed to go on a trail ride with a bunch of people you thought were, what actors?” James shot Regulus a grin over his shoulder, thinking about their earlier conversation. Regulus scowled in response, and James’s heart gave a little flutter.

“I don’t know, okay. I just thought that surely cowboys weren’t actually all good-looking?”

“You think I’m good-looking?” James had finished setting up the tent and stood, brushing off his jeans. Regulus glared at him again. “If you don’t stop, your face will stick that way.” 

Regulus gave a guttural half-growl of annoyance in response. James smirked, going back to saddlebags to look for the food. Each saddlebag had some of the food meant for the whole group precisely in case anyone should get separated. They didn’t want anyone stranded without the means to survive. 

“Let’s get some wood and make a fire. Then we can make our gourmet dinner.” James held up a package of shelf-stable hot dogs. Regulus’s face started to drop into a frown, but at the last moment, maybe because of James’s earlier chidding, his mouth only pressed into a thin line. 

James led the way, scouring the ground for good kindling. Regulus, to his surprise, was happy to help. If anything, he seemed intent on finding the perfect sticks and held up each one to examine it like it was a rare jewel. 

“You know they’re all going in the fire right,” James said. He couldn’t seem to stop smiling around Regulus. Regulus huffed, his aristocratic nose jutting into the air with an imperious tilt of his chin. 

“Sorry for wanting the best.”

“It’s all right. I like that about you.” And back was that pretty flush. James wondered how far down it traveled. 

They had a good amount of wood when they ventured back to the camp. James set up a place to make the fire, finding some rocks to keep it contained along with leaves and bits of grass to act as kindling. He balanced the sticks in a triangle shape, and then sat back to examine if it was all set. 

“Are you going to hit two rocks together to get it going?” Regulus asked, arms crossed again and looking a little dubious. 

“Actually, I thought I’d use this handy invention.” James held up a lighter he pulled from his pocket. Regulus’s nostrils flared and his eyes narrowed, and James just knew the other man wanted to say something snide. James wanted him to, too, his blood sparked every time he had a sparring match with Regulus. 

“Well, go on then.” Regulus waved his hand at the campfire.

“Of course your majesty.” James gave an awkward bow, still in his crouched position, and flicked the lighter, putting the flame next to the kindling. Soon he had a small fire that would continue to grow as he tended it. “It’ll take a little bit to get this hot enough to cook, so why don’t you have a seat.” James patted the ground near him.

“On the dirt?” Regulus seemed close to throttling James. 

“Oh I forgot, you city folk are too afraid to get dirty.” James smirked, leaning back on his hands. “What exactly did you think this trip would entail when you booked it to torture Barty?” 

Regulus glared at him, and stomped over, plopping down onto the dirt, mumbling to himself about “stupid cowboys.” James beamed at him, and couldn’t help thinking about other ways he could make Regulus do things. He was distracted from his dirty thoughts by Regulus clearing his throat.

“So, do you think you’ll stay here awhile?” Regulus asked, his voice deceptively light.

“In the middle of nowhere? Probably not. I hope we make it back to the ranch by tomorrow morning.” 

“That’s not what I meant,” Regulus said. James had to still his face not to give away his ruse.

“Oh, it wasn’t?” James asked innocently. “Well, what did you mean?”

“You know what, forget it. You’re incorrigible.” Regulus turned his head to stare into the fire. 

“Okay, okay.” James held his hands up, “I know what you mean. I just think you’re cute when you’re frustrated, sue me.” Ah, the pink was blooming once more. James bit his lip as his thoughts drifted again. 

“I think Remus and I will probably get our own horse ranch. Do trail rides and lessons, that kind of stuff. I don’t mind the whole resort thing, but it can be a little exhausting. Better to have all the people leave at the end of the day.” James sighed, looking up into the slowly darkening sky, soon the stars would be out and he couldn’t wait for Regulus to see it. 

“Yeah, customer service has never been my strong suit either.” Regulus gave a soft smile. “I think I'll finally finish my book once I leave here. I feel strangely motivated.” 

“Maybe you’ll let me read it when you’re finished.” James tilted his head at Regulus, making eye contact and feeling a tingle buzz up his spine.

“Maybe,” Regulus murmured, a small smile on his perfect lips and James had to fight with himself not to lean in and kiss him right there. A spark shot up, almost catching James’s boot that he realized he’d let drift a little too close to the flames. 

“Ah, looks like it’s probably good to make the food.” James cleared his throat and stood, going to grab a few sticks. He produced his pocket knife and whittled the ends to clean them before handing one to Regulus.“Have you ever made s’mores befores?”

“Yes, I’m rich, not uncultured,” Regulus muttered, accepting the stick and a proffered hot dog. James watched amused as Regulus speared the hot dog with utmost concentration. 

“Well, I don’t know what you guys get up to.” James sat back down, making his stick up and thrusting it into the flames. Regulus followed, gentler in his approach.

“We always made s’mores when we went to our summer house,” Regulus said softly.  

“Ah, of course, how could I forget the summer house?” James wiggled his eyebrows at Regulus, who twisted his lips not to smile, instead playfully shoving James’s shoulder. He felt the warmth of the touch even through his t-shirt, and he had to turn back to the flames in hopes Regulus wouldn’t notice his own rosy cheeks. 

They finished cooking their hot dogs quickly, James helping Regulus check that his was done, although mostly it was about warming them up, since the hot dogs were pre-cooked. James had brought a can of beans for the meal as well but they’d decided not to make it, sticking exclusively to the hot dogs. They ate them silently, both going back to make a second one. 

After finishing their meal, James felt pleasantly full and relaxed. The sky was almost completely dark now, and he wanted to show Regulus the stars.

James got up and cleaned up the trash, putting it into a bag and using some twine to toss it up, letting it dangle from a branch. He secured it below, then went to grab two blankets from the satchel. 

“Why did you do that?’ Regulus looked perplexed. 

“Oh, to keep the bears away, of course,” James said, walking back to Regulus with the blankets folded over his arm. 

“Bears!” Regulus looked panicked again.

“Yeah, but don’t worry. They probably won’t come around. Now,  come on.” James grabbed Regulus’s arm, leading him slightly away from the camp.

“Wait, what about other animals?” Regulus dug his heels in a bit. 

“We’re fine, come on. I want to show you something.”

Regulus seemed to force himself to relax, allowing himself to be led. James found a good spot a few paces away from the fire and laid out the two blankets side by side, then sat down on one. 

“Come on, lay down.” James patted the other blanket, Regulus looked wary but did as he was told, sitting down, then mimicking James as he laid back. 

“So, what do you want to show me?” Regulus was staring at James, and James almost didn’t want him to look away.

“Look up.” James reluctantly turned his eyes away from Regulus, and looked up at the sky, which was now completely black except for the thousands of stars and the brilliant glow of the moon, only a sliver of it shining.

James could tell when Regulus looked up by the tiny gasp that left his mouth. He couldn’t help turning his head to look at Regulus again, his face full of wonder as he took in the unpolluted night sky. 

“Wow,” Regulus said breathlessly, “ this is an incredible view.”

“Yeah it is.” James responded, still staring at Regulus. They laid like that, quietly staring at the vastness of the night sky, listening to the calming sounds of nature, until James was afraid Regulus had fallen asleep. 

“Hey, you awake?” He elbowed Regulus in the side. 

“Yeah,” Regulus responded, although it sounded distorted by a yawn.

“Let’s go into the tent.” James stood up slowly and extended a hand to pull Regulus up beside him. He did it with a little too much force, causing Regulus to stumble into him. They were so close, James would barely have to lean in at all.

Regulus mumbled an apology, and took a tentative step back, walking slowly back to the glow of the dying fire and the tent. James followed after grabbing the blankets and shaking them out.

“I just have to put this out fully, go on into the tent.” 

Regulus nodded, lifting the flap and crawling into the tent. James poured some water onto the embers, stomping the rest out with his boots. He checked the horses were still secure, then steeled himself to join Regulus in the tent.

The very cozy, very small tent he would have to spend the night in, with a man he couldn’t stop thinking of. James was in for a rough night. 

Chapter 8

Regulus was halfway asleep by the time he climbed into the tent. 

He couldn’t imagine growing sleepy out in the wilderness like this; in fact, when he’d signed them up for an overnight ride, he’d planned to stay awake the entire night and sleep on the plane ride back to D.C. 

It was the stars that did it for him. The stars and the smell of driftwood and sage that hit his nose every time James was close enough. They both brought a sense of wonder and safety he hadn’t felt in years, the kind of relaxation that he wasn’t sure he’d felt in a long time. When he was very young, he’d been obsessed with stars and constellations, a side effect of being from a family like his, but he hadn’t made an effort to go stargazing since he was a teenager. 

Seeing the stars in Wyoming was like accessing a piece of himself that he’d long thought was lost, something opening in his chest to remind him where his creativity formed and where he could access it if he tried hard enough. 

James was just a mystery, a spark of attraction and interest that made him feel like a blushing virgin. It was a stupid way to think given the fact that James was just an employee, paid to be kind to Regulus—and potentially save his life a few times, good fucking God, he just couldn’t catch a break. There was no reason for Regulus’s heart to skip a beat each time James got a little too close. 

He settled into his sleeping bag after kicking off his shoes, not bothering to change into the set of warm pajamas he’d brought. He was too tired for that, and he didn’t want to be partially undressed when James joined him.

Regulus was sure it wasn’t normal to share a tent with one of the ranchers, but James had only set up one, and there were two sleeping bags laid out inside. 

When his head hit the built-in pillow of the sleeping bag, he immediately started drifting to sleep. He barely noticed when James unzipped the tent door and settled in next to him. He barely even felt nervous. 

A snap startled him out of a dream, something about his book, he didn’t know, it was already escaping his consciousness. His heart pounded, his body unable to move as he listened. It was pitch dark in the tent and completely silent beyond James’s quiet breathing. He must have dreamt it, that was his only thought. 

Right as his heart rate began to slow, he heard another one. This snap was a few feet closer. He reached out a hand from inside his sleeping bag and immediately slapped James in the chest. He grunted in his sleep. 

“Shh,” Regulus hissed. 

“Wh—what?” James whispered, disoriented from sleep. 

“There’s something out there,” Regulus said frantically, keeping his voice as quiet as possible in his panic. 

“Regulus?” James asked. Regulus wanted to violently shake him. Two more snaps came from the campsite. 

“It’s a bear!” Regulus said too loudly. 

James jumped, then blinked harshly as if he was finally awake enough to remember where they were. He fumbled around for his glasses and shoved them on his face when he got hold of them. 

“A bear?” he asked. 

“Can’t you hear that?” Regulus asked. He was seconds away from hyperventilating, he could tell. 

James tilted his head like a dog listening for something no human could hear. Rustling came from the tent door, and Regulus jumped so violently that he elbowed James in the chest. James gripped Regulus’s arm firmly and moved away enough so he could get up onto his knees, turning on a dim flashlight that was sitting between them. James was wearing plaid pajama bottoms and a short-sleeved t-shirt that left little to the imagination. With the benefit of light, Regulus could make out every curve of his muscular arms and chest beneath his shirt. 

He moved toward the tent door, and Regulus gripped onto his shoulders to stop him. It barely made James pause, he extended his left hand to unzip the door while curling his right one behind him so he could settle a hand on Regulus’s hip, squeezing him closer like he was trying to comfort him. 

“Don’t open it,” Regulus whispered. 

“I’m just going to scare it off.” 

“It’s going to eat us!” 

“If it wanted to eat us, a tent isn’t going to stop it.” 

Regulus whimpered, letting out a sound he was sure he’d be embarrassed about later. James squeezed his hip again and then unzipped the door to reveal a small raccoon sniffing around their extinguished campfire. The raccoon froze when it saw them.

“That is a very small bear,” James said. 

Regulus breathed out a sigh of relief, falling heavily against James’s back without meaning to. His hand was still on Regulus’s hip. It was very distracting, it wasn’t his fault. 

“I thought we were going to die,” Regulus said. 

James chuckled, then made a small set of hissing sounds to scare the raccoon away. It took off into the night, leaving them alone. James, as if sensing Regulus’s still hammering heart, moved his hand up from Regulus’s hip to his waist. It sent an unexpected surge of heat through him, and Regulus gasped slightly. 

“All right?”

“Yeah,” Regulus whispered. He pulled away regretfully, instantly growing cold now that he wasn’t pressed against James, and slowly lay back onto his mostly unzipped sleeping bag. “That was humiliating.” 

James zipped up the tent and turned to look at him. “Don’t worry about it,” he said with a soft smile. 

Really, Regulus would have been better off if James were shirtless rather than wearing something so form-fitting. He couldn’t drag his eyes away. It was like James was trying to give him a heart attack. James cleared his throat, and Regulus’s eyes jumped up from where they’d been lingering on the tight muscles near James’s hips. James, to Regulus’s continued humiliation, was smirking. 

Regulus wanted to cover his face with his hands, it was only through a show of great willpower that he stopped himself. “I apologize,” he said quickly. 

“What are you apologizing for?” James asked. He sounded far too entertained for Regulus’s liking.

Regulus wasn’t sure what he planned to say, but what came out was, “Your shirt.” As if the damn thing was personally victimizing him. 

James laughed hard enough for his shoulders to shake. It wasn’t helping the situation. 

“I didn’t realize it was offending you that much. Would you prefer if I removed it?” 

Regulus felt his entire body go hot, and he was sure he would have had more control over his reactions if it wasn’t the middle of the night and he hadn’t just been nearly scared to death. His mouth opened, but no sound came out. James’s goofy smile turned into something heavier like molasses melting on a hot summer day. He set the flashlight down in the corner of the tent and then grabbed the back of his shirt, watching Regulus with careful eyes as he slowly pulled it from his body. 

“Oh my God,” Regulus whispered without meaning to. He’d felt James against him more than a few times now, but it was different seeing him like this, shirtless and kneeling before him, the two of them crowded into a small tent with no one around for miles. 

“I can put it back on,” James said, speaking as if he had even a single reason to be embarrassed. He shouldn’t ever be embarrassed, not when he looked like that. 

Regulus shook his head a little too frantically. He pulled his legs up from where they were stretched out in front of him, curling them toward him to block the view of his hardening cock. It seemed to have the opposite effect, his movement drawing James’s eye. Regulus felt light-headed already, he’d been so sure that James was only being polite with him, but now he was looking down with heat and interest. 

He wasn’t sure what made him do it, maybe it was the deliriousness of fear and lack of sleep or maybe it was the way James’s eyes lingered on his legs or maybe it was just because he’d been thinking about this for several days and that had given him brain rot, but slowly, he opened his bent legs, his jeans fighting against the movement. 

James didn’t even blink as he watched, his mouth hanging open slightly. Regulus wished he could touch James’s warm stretch of skin. He was sure his chest would feel even better like this, no clothes between them. A light smattering of hair decorated James’s chest, breaking up below his nipples and reforming right below his belly button. 

Tempting. That’s how he looked. 

“Those don’t look comfortable to sleep in,” James said, his voice dazed. 

“What?” Regulus asked. He had to force himself to look away from the hair near James’s pajama bottoms. 

“Your jeans,” James said. “Do you want me to take them off?” 

Regulus swallowed. He felt like someone was simultaneously standing on his chest and forcing too much oxygen inside his lungs. He nodded. 

“Please,” he whispered. He half expected James to lunge for him, but he didn’t. He moved slowly, with great care and precision. One of his large hands settled on Regulus’s knee and pushed it open a little further, and the other reached forward to unbutton his jeans with deft, skilled movements. 

Regulus could only watch, he felt awestruck, almost as if he was still dreaming. 

James unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, then he reached below him, tucking his arms under both of Regulus’s legs, and grabbed the waistband of his jeans, pulling them off along with his boxers. Regulus hadn’t expected him to do that, but he wasn’t complaining. The cold air of the tent made goosebumps break out across his legs, but James’s hot gaze kept him warm, especially as he tossed Regulus’s jeans to the side. 

“You’re hard,” James said, a bit stupidly, staring down at where Regulus’s hard cock was lying against his stomach.

Regulus almost wanted to snap at him. What he said instead was, “You’re shirtless.”

“Can I touch you?” James asked.

“Yes,” Regulus whispered. 

James lifted his eyes to meet Regulus’s. Regulus didn’t think he’d ever seen desire like that before. He’d had sex before, one-night stands and short-term flings, but he never really felt wanted . He hadn’t even realized what he’d been missing. 

“Can I kiss you?” James asked like the gentleman he was. 

“Please,” Regulus replied emphatically. 

James moved quickly this time, leaning over him, right between Regulus’s spread legs, and kissing him hotly on the lips. He didn’t give Regulus even a second to process that before his tongue was sliding into Regulus’s mouth and his hand was wrapping loosely around Regulus’s cock. 

Regulus groaned, his back arching, pushing his chest up to meet James’s. He didn’t think he’d ever been overwhelmed so quickly. He felt like James was everywhere, his scent, his skin, his grip, his tongue . Regulus was consumed by him. He wrapped his arms around James’s shoulders and pulled him as close as he could, wishing he’d thought to remove his shirt before he’d started this so that he could feel James’s skin against his. 

James approached kissing in the same way he did everything else on the ranch, with a casual confidence that made Regulus feel a little short of breath. He knew exactly how to move his tongue and lips to make Regulus moan. He moved his hand gently along Regulus’s length, but never quite enough to get him off. 

It didn’t take long for Regulus to grow desperate, his hips twitching as he sought out more pressure. 

“James,” Regulus gasped after using a grip on James’s hair to pull his head back slightly. James looked needy above him. It made Regulus falter long enough for James to escape his grasp and start kissing him again. Regulus kissed him back, his desperation growing more and more frantic. He yanked on James’s hair this time, and James pulled back obediently. “I need more.”

James groaned quietly. “What do you need, darlin’?” He pressed down on Regulus’s body as he asked, his pajamas rubbing against Regulus’s cock. Regulus’s hips twitched again, hard enough that he could feel James’s length between his legs. 

Regulus’s body felt like it would catch fire as he gasped out the words, “Fuck me. Please.” 

James’s head fell forward, his forehead resting against Regulus’s own. “Are you sure?”

“I’m going to lose my mind if you don’t,” Regulus said truthfully. 

“We don’t have anything.”

“I know,” Regulus said. “I’m clean. I haven’t—not in a long time.”

“You haven’t...?”

“Done this,” Regulus confessed. 

James made a wounded noise, his hand squeezing Regulus’s cock just enough to make Regulus whine. “Me either,” James said before Regulus could think to feel embarrassed. “We don’t have lube.”

“Just use spit,” Regulus said. He practically growled it, though he hadn’t intended to. James let out a soft laugh and kissed Regulus deeply. 

When he pulled back, Regulus was breathless again. “Turn over,” he whispered. Regulus barely had to obey, James’s hands were on him the entire time, spinning him onto his stomach. He settled between Regulus’s legs while he pulled Regulus’s shirt from his body. Slow and filthy kisses and bites littered down Regulus’s back as James’s hands settled on his backside, kneading his ass and pulling him apart enough to make Regulus twitch. 

“Is this okay?” James whispered, his lips pressed against Regulus’s lower back. 

“Yes,” Regulus breathed, resting his head onto his folded arms. “Yes, it’s perfect.” 

James hummed, placing a kiss against Regulus’s hip, and then his mouth was there, between Regulus's cheeks, heat pressing up against his hole. Fuck, it had been a long time. Way longer than he wanted to admit. He must have forgotten what this could feel like because there was no way any of his past lovers had ever made him feel anything close to this. 

Regulus’s toes curled, his legs already shaking slightly, as James laved his tongue against his hole. He couldn’t stop the moans dripping from his lips, not that he wanted to, not when every sound he let out seemed to spur James on. Not when he moaned James’s name, and it made James add a finger alongside his tongue, stretching Regulus open with delicate worship. 

It had been a while, and yet there was no pain. James was careful with him as if he were some breakable object, as if he were something meant to be cherished. He was near tears by the time James added a second finger, working them in slowly and spreading them apart so Regulus could feel every time that tight ring of muscles was stretched open a little further. 

When James added a third finger, Regulus had to say something. 

“Stop, stop, please,” Regulus gasped. James pulled back instantly, his fingers vanishing from inside him. 

“Did I hurt you?” James asked nervously. 

Regulus panted a few times, trying desperately to catch his breath. He pushed himself up onto all fours and then reached between his legs to grip his cock hard around the base. “If you kept going, I was going to come.” 

James was quiet for a long moment, and then Regulus felt his hand settle onto his back. “I thought that was the point,” James said in a low voice. Regulus had to squeeze just a little harder.

“I’m not ready yet,” Regulus said. James sucked in a breath and then his lips were on Regulus’s, tilting Regulus’s head to the side so he could gain access. Regulus kissed him back, but his mind lingered on the way James’s other hand was starting to move. It wasn’t touching Regulus, but Regulus could feel James’s entire body shifting with its motion. 

When James pulled away and sat back on his knees, Regulus nearly collapsed. He looked over his shoulder just in time to see James spit into his waiting hand, rubbing his palm over his cock. Regulus knew it would be big, he’d felt it against him earlier, but he was still shocked to see the size of it in James’s hand. 

If he wasn’t already so desperate, he would turn around and beg to suck on it. 

“Are you sure?” James asked again when he looked up. Regulus was half drooling, he figured that should have been answer enough, but he nodded regardless. 

“I need you,” Regulus said. He felt like a broken record. He opened his legs a little wider and arched his back so that James would know exactly what he meant, as if there was any way to miss it. James tilted his head back and closed his eyes, groaning deep in his chest. The sight of it would be burned into Regulus’s memories, he could already tell. 

His eyes were lit with a fire so deep it seemed to come from his very soul when he looked at Regulus again. He kissed Regulus once more, moving forward smoothly, and when Regulus felt the head of James’s cock at his hole, he couldn’t bring himself to kiss back. All he could do was stare into James’s eyes, his mouth hanging open, as James worked himself inside. 

Regulus had been stretched plenty, but it was still a lot . He couldn’t think of anything but the way James was spearing him open, making a space inside him just for him. He was so careful, so slow and purposeful with the way he moved, and Regulus felt like he was on the brink of losing his mind. 

“Is it too much?” James said when he was almost completely in. Regulus shook his head. 

“You’re perfect.” It was all he could think to say. James gripped his waist firmly and pressed in those last few inches, making Regulus gasp and groan, his back bending enough that he had to rest his head back on the sleeping bag in front of him just to stay afloat. 

“You take me so well,” James said, his voice layered with awe. “So well, darlin’.” He pulled back and thrust back in powerfully, and Regulus let out a moan that sounded like he was mid-sob. He wasn’t going to last long. He was lucky he’d lasted until this moment at all. 

“More,” Regulus cried. “More, please.”

“You’re so polite,” James said, and he sounded like he was grinning, he sounded like he was pleased as punch. Regulus didn’t know if he was being made fun of or not, but it didn’t matter because James gave him exactly what he wanted, setting a steady pace with his hips, pressing himself right up against Regulus’s prostate with every motion. 

If Regulus hadn’t been delirious before, he was definitely delirious now. He was lost. He was nothing but a ball of pleasure building and building. 

He squeezed down hard on James’s cock, his fingers clenching tightly around the sleeping bag as James gripped onto him tight enough to bruise. Regulus was close, his legs shaking with the need to come. If he even touched his cock right now, he would finish. He was almost tempted to do it, but then James pulled out and made Regulus release a noise of complaint. 

James turned him over quickly, flipping him onto his back, and dragged Regulus’s ankles up to sit on his shoulders. Regulus didn’t even have time to get a full word out before James was re-entering him. 

He’d thought it was intense before, but seeing James’s wrecked face and his burning eyes made Regulus feel like he would never be the same. No one else would ever be able to match up to this. He was ruined. 

And then James gripped his cock and stroked him in time with his thrusts, and Regulus wondered if it was possible to fall in love this quickly. 

He came hard enough that his vision blacked out. James moaned loudly, his thrusts growing sloppy as he followed after him over the edge. Regulus gasped and panted, his breath struggling to slow as James collapsed on top of him. 

“I’m sorry,” James said. “I should have pulled out. I didn’t ask—”

“James,” Regulus said, speaking with great effort. James paused and waited, Regulus turned his head so they could kiss again, and the exhaustion they both felt was obvious in the way their lips met. “I don’t care,” he said simply. 

James laughed tiredly, right into Regulus’s mouth. Regulus never wanted to leave this moment.

Chapter 9

James woke with the sun, as he often did after a night of camping. Before he even opened his eyes, he thought about last night, wondering distantly whether it was a dream. It was only when he shifted and felt Regulus, a very naked Regulus, curled up next to him that he realized it was real. 

He could get used to this. He almost didn’t want to disturb the other man, but then realized watching someone sleep, no matter how naked he’d seen them just hours before, might be a bit creepy. Also, he remembered abruptly, they needed to get back to the ranch before too much panic ensued. The others would have no idea what happened to them and though James had spent plenty of time out in the wild on nights like these, that didn’t mean that Regulus’s friends would be comfortable with him going missing for the night. 

Pulling away from Regulus’s sleeping form was almost torture. James tried not to miss him too much as he pulled on his clothes as quietly as he could, wanting to give Regulus some more time to sleep. The other man didn’t even stir. James was envious, he wished he could be such a deep sleeper. He ran a hand through his hair trying to make himself presentable before he woke Regulus.

“Hey,” James whispered, gently shaking Regulus before leaning away. He wasn’t sure how startled the other man might be in the morning. Remus threw punches if anyone woke him up too early, and James had enough bruises to know that it was best to err on the side of caution.

“Hmm, Sirius, leave me alone.” Regulus mumbled, burrowing into the sleeping bag.

“I’m definitely not your brother, not sure what kind of relationship you guys have,” James said. Regulus’s eyes popped open, and he sat up, the sleeping bag pooling around his waist. James couldn’t help admiring the pale plains of Regulus’s body.

“Oh.” Regulus flushed, and James was pleased to see the way the red extended down his neck. Regulus blinked twice and then glared, pulling the sleeping bag up to cover his nipples. 

“Stop leering at me” Regulus snapped, scanning his eyes around the tent until they landed on his own crumbled clothes.

“I can’t help it.” James smirked, very much considering sinking his teeth into the side of Regulus’s beautiful neck.

“Don’t you have some work to do?” Regulus’s lips thinned, almost as if he wanted to smile but refused to. James playfully rolled his eyes.

“Yes, you’re majesty. If my services are no longer needed here, I can go elsewhere.” James ogled Regulus shamelessly. This might be his last chance to do it, he wasn’t going to miss out. “All right, all right,” James laughed, getting up and leaving the tent. He could hear Regulus mumbling to himself as the flap closed.

The day couldn’t be more beautiful. Maybe it was only because he woke up next to the man he’d been dreaming of, but who could say? The sky was perfectly clear, the sunrise still shooting shades of orange and red across the pallet. It took James’s breath away sometimes, knowing he got to see such beauty on a day to day basis. 

He did a quick inspection of the campsite–it didn’t appear that the raccoon had done much damage–before he went over to check the horses. They were quietly grazing near the tree where he’d left them. 

“Hey guys, hope you had a good night. I know I did,” he said in a low voice so Regulus wouldn’t hear him. Luna nuzzled against James’s pocket, probably hoping for treats.“Sorry girl, we'll be back soon, and Remus will spoil you.” James patted her flank, then went about clearing up the campsite and getting the horses ready.

He started by saddling the horses, putting their reins back on. Then, he got the trash from the tree, attaching it to one of the saddles. After that, he looked around the campsite to see if they’d left anything else. It was important to always pack out anything that they’d brought in, the number one camping rule.

Satisfied that everything was clear, James walked back to the tent, the only thing left.

“Hey, you done in there?” James rapped the tarp, then lifted the flap to peer inside. Regulus was lying fully clothed on top of the sleeping bags, eyes closed. “Uh, what are you doing?” James quirked up an eyebrow, trying to contain his laugh.

“Oh, I'm just contemplating my poor choices,” Regulus said with a forlorn sigh. James's heart stuttered and his stomach dropped. 

Regulus opened his eyes and James's worry must have been plain across his face, because Regulus smiled, rolling his eyes. He sat up and tugged James down into the tent, planting a toe-curling kiss on his lips. 

“You weren’t the poor choice,” Regulus whispered against James’s mouth. James’s brain was taking a while to catch up with the words.

“Oh,” James responded, lamely. “Uh, then, what?” James’s usual quips were lost to him.

“You’re usually more intelligent than this, cowboy.” Regulus smirked, making the blood rush to James’s groin. Before James could contemplate forgetting the ranch and staying in this tent with Regulus naked for the rest of his life, Regulus flopped back down, putting distance between them.“I don’t have any clothes to change into.” Regulus finally said, a little pout in his voice.

“Uh,” James was confused now. He sat back on his haunches and studied Regulus, who looked perfect even after spending a night camping. Regulus stared at him pointedly, and James was sure he was supposed to know something, but he couldn’t figure out for the life of him what it was. “You look all right to me”

“Of course, I look alright. That’s not the point.” Regulus looked up, huffing in a regal way like a long-suffering sovereign.

“Okay, well, then what’s the problem?” James asked, eyeing his own grimy clothes. Regulus had turned a slight pinkish color, then let out a half-growl, getting up from his position.

“Nothing is the problem. I could just use a shower. Are we ready to go?” Regulus pushed past James to leave the tent. James knew he probably shouldn’t be getting turned on by Regulus’s moodiness, but he couldn’t help it. He wanted to fuck the attitude out of him.

A slow grin came over James’s face as he left the tent, wondering if there might be time again before Regulus left the ranch. Outside the tent, the sun was shining even more brightly, and Regulus was looking skeptically at the horses.

“Are you worried about riding again?” James asked, already pulling the sleeping bags from the tent, rolling them up into tight bundles to hook on the saddles.

“I wouldn’t say I'm exactly thrilled. How long is the ride?”

“Not too long,” James frowned, scanning the sky and making some calculations. “Probably thirty or so minutes back to the original trail then an hour from there if we go faster than a trot.” James brought the bundles to the saddles, strapping each on.

“Of course.” Regulus tilted his head skyward, his eyes closed and nostril flaring as if he was trying to compose himself against the inevitable. “Well, let’s get on with it,” he sighed, walking back to the horses.

James had used Regulus’s contemplation time to break down the tent, stowing the rods and tarp on the horses.

“Well, don’t be too excited to spend the morning with me,” James joked. Regulus only rolled his eyes again, a small smile threatening to take over the other man’s face. “Do you need help up?” James asked, hoping the answer was yes.

“I suppose I wouldn’t mind a little help,” Regulus said primly. James knew he had a goofy look on his face, but he didn’t care as he hoisted Regulus up. He liked being able to grip Regulus’s hips, letting the sharp bones leave imaginary imprints in his palms.

Regulus hissed slightly when he landed on the horse, his eyes squeezing closed like he was in pain or humiliated by something. 

“Are you okay?” James asked. 

Regulus’s cheeks turned bright red. “I’m quite fine, thank you,” he said stiffly. 

“Okay,” James said slowly, glancing down at Regulus’s white knuckles around the horse’s reins. “Try not to hold the reins too tight.” Regulus let his grip loosen slightly on the reins. James gave his hip one more squeeze, because he couldn’t help himself and then went to his own horse and swung up easily. 

He did not look to see if Regulus saw (he did), because it was silly to show off something like that. Regulus’s appreciative gaze had James preening, although he tried to smother his grin so Regulus wouldn’t know how he affected him. It made him feel like a peacock trying to show off. 

“Okay let’s get going. Turn the reins and dig your heels in a little. I’ll let you go first.” James watched Regulus maneuver his horse. It was clumsy but not without some promise. James followed, bringing his horse to Regulus’s side.

They rode in companionable silence for a while, James sneaking glances at Regulus, who had a look of intense concentration. James almost laughed at how stern he looked as if Regulus could stop any more mishaps by merrily lecturing them enough.

“You know, you can relax. I got you,” James reassured. Regulus turned to him with a startled look as if he were so engrossed he’d forgotten someone else was with him.

“Well, I suppose I could relax a little. After all, you are a real cowboy and not just an actor.” Regulus smiled playfully, and James thought it was lucky he had such a good seat on his horse, or he might have fallen off. Regulus looked so perfect when he smiled. James couldn’t help but smile back, hoping he didn’t look too stupid, grinning like a dope.

 “I sure am. 100% bona fide all-American cowboy.” James wiggled his eyebrows at Regulus, who burst out laughing, clutching the horn of the saddle to keep himself from toppling over.

“Okay, no more making me laugh unless you also happen to be a doctor. I think I'd break at least an arm falling off this horse.”

“Better an arm than your butt.”

“Oh, are you thinking about my ass?” Regulus smirked at James, who felt his face heat at the memories of last night.

“Uh, well,” James sputtered. Regulus only gave a soft laugh, shaking his head at James. 

“You’re right though, I don’t think my ass can take anymore… well, anymore .” 

James choked on his spit and had to cough hard a few times to clear his throat. “Excuse me?” 

Regulus shook his head again but this time he didn’t reply. Neither of them spoke until they made it back onto the trail, James directing them both down the skinny piece of dirt between the lines of trees. 

“How can you tell this is the trail?” Regulus asked, as James instructed him to turn their horses to the right.

“Well, I've ridden it about a million times, but also, we have these little markers.” James pointed to a barely noticeable rock tower.

“That just looks like a stack of rocks.” Regulus frowned.

“It is,” James laughed. “But it’s also a trail marker. You can’t tell from up here all that well but there is a painted rock in the middle.” He pointed and Regulus squinted to see but gave up with a shrug.

“I suppose I'll have to trust you. Hopefully, you’re not secretly leading me to my death.”

“I would never lead you astray.” The words came out more earnest than they intended. He’d only known Regulus a few days but felt a pull to the other man that he’d never felt before. He tried not to examine it too closely, especially given that he likely only had another handful of hours left with Regulus before he never saw him again. 

Regulus didn’t comment on his oddly serious tone, but James thought he noticed a smile curling at the edge of Regulus’s lips. They moved at a walk down the trail, even though Regulus had seemed eager to get back. Neither of them mentioned it out loud. 

“So, you said you were a writer?” James asked as he reached Regulus’s side once again when the trail widened slightly. Regulus looked shocked like he hadn’t expected James to remember something said in passing.

“Yes, I’ve been working on a book.”

“What’s it about?”

“It’s still in the works” Regulus responded evasively.

“I’m sure it will be great when you’re done.” James thought he might be laying it on a bit thick, but the pleased smile on Regulus’s face was worth it.  

“I have been inspired lately.”

“Oh, have you? Is it going to turn into a cowboy romance?” James winked.

“You’re very full of yourself for someone covered in dirt.”

“Dirt is important for the authentic experience.” 

Regulus grinned. “Is that authentic dirt the reason you don’t encourage guests to bring a change to clothes for the ride back? So they’ll reek of sweat and mud.”

“Naturally,” James replied with a matching grin, “how else are they going to feel like real cowboys?” 

“That’s ridiculous,” Regulus said, but he laughed loudly enough for James’s chest to warm. 

James joined him before clarifying, “It’s actually to limit the amount of weight the horses are carrying. They may be horses, but they’re more pampered than what most cowboys would be used to. It’s best to keep the packs light. Plus,” he added, “we had too many people bringing extra pairs of boots and several different outfits so they could take pictures in the wilderness and that just wouldn’t do. It ruined the whole aesthetic.”

“Yes, I can see that aesthetic is very important to you,” Regulus said sardonically, eyeing the way James’s hair stuck out from under his hat. 

“I can appreciate aesthetics,” James said, not once did his eyes leave Regulus’s face. 

The ride seemed easier than it had the night before, at least it did for James. Maybe it was because he only had to deal with one other person rather than an entire group. It seemed more relaxing this way. Regulus was more talkative now that they were alone, and after what they’d done the night before, which James enjoyed immensely. He asked thoughtful questions about the foliage they passed and the animals that lived in the area–they must have seemed a lot less scary in the daytime. 

“It’s actually really nice out here,” Regulus said, after a few moments of silence, his voice barely above a whisper as if he didn’t want to disturb the nature around them.

“It is. I’m glad you were able to see it.” James’s cheeks hurt from how much he’d been smiling around Regulus, but he couldn’t help that sharing this with Regulus made him incredibly happy. “I would say that I’m sorry we got thrown off course, but I’m really not,” James confessed. 

Regulus laughed. “I’m surprised that I don’t mind either.” He gave James a heated look through his lashes before breaking into another laugh. “Besides, my brother is probably glad to be rid of me.”

“Why do you say that?”

“He’s been begging for a moment alone with Remus since we got here. Us leaving was just two less people for Remus to talk to.” 

James gasped before laughing as well. “Sirius likes Remus?”

“You have no idea,” Regulus said then paused. “You probably shouldn’t tell him I told you. He’ll claw my eyes out.”

“Remus is not good at picking up flirty queues from people. You should tell Sirius to show up to his room naked and then he’ll get the idea.”

“I am not telling my brother to do that,” Regulus said with a wheezing laugh. “Besides, what if Remus isn’t interested? Does he even like men?”

James nodded emphatically. “He never talks to anyone this much, even about his horses. Trust me, if Sirius made the first move, Remus would be on his knees for him.” 

Regulus cringed. “Please don’t put that imagery into my head,” he said. James laughed. 

It took them longer to get back than James predicted, but they didn’t move like they were in a hurry so it barely mattered.

“Look, we’re almost back.” James pointed, as the ranch’s fence came into view. It was only a little bit now till they’d be back at the barn. James felt disappointment stir inside him, maybe he should spook the horse again.

That thought was cut short by a shout. It was Marlene, who seemed to be on lookout duty. She jogged out of the fence toward where they were riding.

“Wow! Am I glad to see you. Remus hasn’t shut up about the missing horses.”

“He would care more about them than me.” James pouted. “He probably didn’t even notice I was gone.”

“How could we not notice you were gone? The ranch was practically silent without you gabbing all the time.” Marlene was walking next to James’s horse now as they rode into the ranch.

“You wound me, Mar.” James clutched his chest, Regulus snorting next to him. James dismounted as he saw the approaching form of Remus. He was hobbling awkwardly as he often did after a lot of riding. He didn’t have great joints, but he loved to ride. He’d told James once that it was always worth the pain he suffered later. 

“Here, let me help you down,” James said to Regulus, who obliged the offered hand, sliding down, his body pressing against James. James wanted to stay that way, but Regulus cleared his throat, stepping away as the other guests ran up, all of them in the same clothes they were wearing yesterday. They must not have had the time to change since they got back. 

“Reggie! We thought you were lost forever.” Barty threw himself on Regulus in a dramatic fashion, nearly knocking them both to the ground. Remus came up right after, moving a little too slowly to beat Barty, but spared not a glance at James, instead cooing to the horses about their adventure.

“Yeah, love you too, Remus.”

“I knew you’d be fine, but the horses,” Remus said without looking at him. He took the reins from James’s hand and turned to lead them to the barn. James followed, looking over his shoulder to see Regulus. He wanted to linger but didn’t know what Regulus thought now that they were back with the whole group.

Regulus’s friends were gathered excitingly around him, asking tons of questions. James managed to catch Regulus’s eye, and Regulus gave him a shy smile and a little wave.

James turned back around smiling to himself. Luckily, Remus was too busy talking to the horses to notice anything.

𐚁

“I cannot believe you got a private camping experience when we had to spend all night with the horse lover general and his loyal pet,” Barty said with a real frown. 

Lily smacked him on the arm. “Barty,” she gasped, “it is not nice to call strangers horse lovers.” She glanced at Regulus before adding, “He does seem a bit of a horse lover though, isn’t he? Kind of like Vernon with his obsession with drilling equipment.” 

Regulus shook with laughter and felt grateful that Remus and James were out of earshot. Marlene was still relatively close to them but Peter was asking her about something so she looked too overwhelmed to hear them. 

“Ugh,” Regulus said as he took one step toward the cabins. He really should have considered what it would feel like to ride horseback for hours after bottoming. “I need a shower.”

“Yeah, same,” Lily said. She had her hair braided down the middle and she picked up one thick red braid to sniff it before pulling a face. “When do we have to leave?” 

Regulus’s chest felt tight as he answered. “What time is it?”

“Just after eleven,” Barty answered. 

“We have to leave by one,” Regulus said regretfully. 

“Thank fucking God,” Barty said with a groan. “If I don’t get out of this–” He froze when he noticed Marlene watching him with a frown. “This very nice location that I have no problems with.” He gripped Regulus’s arm tight enough to hurt. “Come along, Regulus.” 

Regulus wasted half an hour showering, but he didn’t feel clean until he had the chance to wash his hair twice. When he stepped out into the steamy bathroom he felt like a new man, but as he packed his belongings, he couldn’t help feeling like he didn’t want to leave. He’d come to the ranch on a whim, he’d never even been to Wyoming. Why did it feel so wrong to be getting on a plane? 

After he packed his suitcase, he dragged it to the front door and stepped out onto the porch where Sirius was leaning against the railing watching Remus and James walk out of the barn in the distance. Sirius spared him one passing glance before his eyes returned to Remus. 

“Good night?” Regulus asked lightly. 

Sirius smiled slowly, a twinkle in his eye. He looked over his shoulder at the front door and when he found that they were alone, he leaned toward Regulus and said, “ Great night.” 

Regulus’s eyebrows shot up. “Really?” 

“Not to say we weren’t worried about you,” Sirius added. It had never been more obvious that he hadn’t been worried. “But Remus and Marlene took turns telling us these silly ghost stories around the fire. It was a blast. And after everyone went to bed–” a wicked smile crossed Sirius’s face “–Remus and I kissed .”

Regulus laughed in surprise. “Damn, good for you,” Regulus said. “You got him to stop talking about horses long enough to manage it?” 

Sirius snickered, looking back toward Remus. The two of them had almost made it to the main building and would be out of sight soon. 

“How about you? Were you scared of camping alone with James?”

“Why would I be scared?”

“You used to cry if you didn’t have a nightlight.”

“I was five,” Regulus said dryly. 

“No, that was when you were seventeen, I remember,” Sirius said. 

Regulus scoffed and chose to ignore him. He looked back at the two countrymen and sighed. “It was a great night,” he said softly, more softly than he intended. 

Sirius froze and then slowly turned his head to look at Regulus, moving like a haunted doll. “Are you fucking kidding me ?” he hissed. 

Regulus glanced at him. “What?” 

“You fucked.”

“I’m sorry?” Regulus shouted. 

“You two fucked. That’s disgusting, Regulus. You don’t even know the man.”

“How do you know we slept together?” Regulus asked in a high voice and then shook himself. “You don’t know Remus either and you would have slept with him if he actually wanted you.” 

“You little dick,” Sirius said and lunged. Regulus barely had time to step out of the way. 

“Please tell me you’re not about to start pulling each other’s hair again. There was so much blood last time,” Peter said pathetically. Regulus hadn’t noticed him step outside. 

“We’re not,” Regulus said quickly. 

“Regulus fucked James!” Sirius said, pointing his finger accusatorially. 

“Oh, nice, good for you, Regulus,” Peter said, giving him a pat on the back. 

Regulus groaned and covered his face with his hands. “Sirius, please stop spreading that around. I actually really like–” He cut himself off but it was already too late. 

Sirius was quiet for a long second. “Oh, all right,” he said. “He is handsome.” Sirius sighed. “Take back what you said about Remus not liking me.”

“James said he’s obsessed with you,” Regulus offered to appease his brother. 

Sirius grinned sharply. “I knew it.”

Leaving Deerwolf Ranch was worse than Regulus would have imagined, especially because he and James barely had time to say goodbye privately. They were out of time and Marlene was driving them to the airport, James assigned to another task on the ranch. As they were leaving, James and Regulus discreetly exchanged phone numbers, and then they were gone. Regulus couldn’t bear to look back at the ranch as they drove off. 

They made it to the airport forty-five minutes before their flight. Regulus bought himself a coffee and tried to remember the things he had to look forward to back home. The list seemed to be dwindling by the second. 

Right before they boarded their plane, Sirius came over to stand next to him. 

“You look miserable,” Sirius said. 

“Don’t rub it in,” Regulus muttered. 

Sirius gave him an appraising look. “I can’t remember the last time you really liked someone,” Sirius said. Regulus thought he was joking but his face was sincere. 

“I know, me either,” Regulus said. 

“You know, I have some free time in two weeks. I was going to take a few days off to go to New York to see some friends, but you and I could go somewhere if you’d like.”

Regulus looked at him in confusion. “Like where?” 

Sirius raised one eyebrow and tilted his head toward the airport doors. Regulus felt his heart speed up. He pulled out his phone and with enough nervousness to make him feel nauseous, he sent his first text to James asking what he thought. Sirius shamelessly read over his shoulder, chuckling when he saw James’s reply come back a second later. 

James: Yes! Please! Come back immediately. Right now!  

“I’ll book our flights,” Sirius said. 

Regulus could only stare at the message, excitement like he’d never felt before galloping in his chest. 

Regulus: See you soon