Work Text:
did u kno that every time i have a bad shift at work its entirely ur fault bc u made this stupid company
hmmm i think the founder of gasball currency would disagree
okay @gasballceo on twitter
hey, its my brand!
literally
:P
yeah and ur brand sucks
rude >:(
anyway what happened today
my coworker sucks
today seems to have a theme
which coworker?
garret
wow. even his name sucks
what did sucky garret do?
ok so like
its three of us on shift, me garret and scott
scott is cool
very obviously gay
but cool
"but"? wowwww what would our moms say
smh elliot
we raised you better than this
shut uppp yk what i mean
anyway he goes to the back and i say to garret that scotts a chill guy right
"hes cool, i like him" wtvr
and garrets like "ooo be careful he might like u back lololol"
and i just kinda look at him like
........... uh huh
oh Yikes™!!!
no frrr
and he got awkward cause i didnt laugh and he was like oh its just a jokeee its not that seriousss
hilarious, garret. you got the whole gasball currency laughing
i just said like no its cool man. i mean my older brother is gay do u think he likes me too
YOU DID NOT SAY THAT
ELLIOT
oliver
THATS DGJHGDHFDS
ik ur pansexual technically but garret can barely count change so i didnt even bother
yeah fair 😭😭
i still cannot believe that was your clapback omj
absolutely yartmapped
what did he even SAY
he was like oh. omg. no i didnt mean it like that etc etc i was kidding and im like whatever
scott is cooler than u ever will be
garret could NEVER
are you still at work?
yea, closing shift
we take turns w/ playing music while cleaning up + its my turn today
i saw my opportunity
oh??
[Screenshot_25817.jpeg]
(screenshot of elliot's current playlist. it is titled "cunty gay music" with an aesthetic pride flag for the cover picture.)
okay first of all
iconic
i kno
second of all
why do you have one of quinn's playlists in ur library
i follow him on spotify
hello??
since when???
you dont even follow ME on spotify
make better playlists
my playlists are IMMACULATE how dare you
[Screenshot_25818.jpeg]
(screenshot of a playlist titled "LOCK IN" with no cover image. the three visible songs at the top are two versions of the pokemon theme followed by undertale's megalovania. it is seven hours long.)
this just proves my point
no it doesnt
i cant believe u hate me..... ur brother.... this is homophobic
no thats garret
speaking of
how is he reacting to your (TRAITOROUS) playlist choice
he has not said a single word 💀
DHFHFJJG
peace and love on earth 🙏
shift finally over. garret just said "see u tmrw" and booked it out of there lmaooo
youre free! 🎉
you got a ride home?
yeah scott dropping me off
shoutout to scott hes a real one
did you tell him the whole saga
oh yea he was a big fan
called it top tier allyship
gasballs ally of the month ⭐
omg wait can you bring me a white hot chocolate pleaaaaase
we already left
pleaaaaaase
nah
a REAL ally would get me hot chocolate
nah
i take it back you are no longer gasballs ally of the month
revoking this ⭐🤏
hey no
u cant do that
give it back
its my stupid company i can do whatever i want
i hate u
that's homophobic
u realize u literally made everything in the universe
u invented homophobia bro
why would u do that
i made HALF of everything
ok so benjamin is homophobic
is that the only way i can win this argument
ya
benny hates gay people 😔
but so do you because you refuse to bring your brother a sweet little treat
your FLESH and BLOOD
im adopted
your flesh and blood in SPIRIT
[Screenshot_25820.jpeg]
(it's a chat with "brother's idiot". elliot sent a cropped screenshot of oliver saying benny hates gay people. benjamin's response is "I'm bisexual." elliot's reply is "so sad when its internalized. rip")
WHYDHGHHHTHHHDHDHFH
WHY DID YOU SEND HIM THAT 😭😭😭
why is ur keysmash so ugly
YOURE ugly
wowww im crushed
how will i ever recover
i need another year long hospital stay to cope w/ that scathing clapback
i was kidding
i kno
sheesh
also i have ur stupid hot chocolate
omg yay
you DO love me
ur so annoying
10/10 customer service best gasball ally of ALL TIME ⭐
i got it at starbucks so idk abt that
AFDGDGF
shhhhh nobody needs to knowww
wow
the corruption goes all the way to the top
almost home btw
👌
gasball currency more like gasball conspiracy
HELP ARE YOU STILL LISTENING TO THAT PLAYLIST???
oh scotts speakers are pretty loud huh
STOP LISTENING TO CHAPPEL ROAN AND BRING ME MY SWEET LITTLE TREAT
not with that tone
pweaaaaase
somehow worse
i ordered pizza 👀
omwww