Chapter 1: Umino Iruka
Chapter Text
In this world, 75% of the population falls into the category known as beta. What does that mean? These are ordinary people, men and women exactly as we know them. And the other 25%?
This portion of society is divided into the categories known as alpha and omega. These people are capable of emitting, producing and sensing each other’s pheromones; in addition, alphas, both men and women, are capable of impregnating any omega — whether male or female as well. To increase the chances of reproduction in these categories, these people go through heat cycles: for the alphas, known as rut, which lasts two days, and for the omegas, known basically as heat, which lasts a week. The rut happens every six months, while the heat is monthly. An omega that doesn't emit pheromones or have a regular heat cycle is considered an anomaly.
And this is exactly the case with Umino Iruka.
At the age of 16, he received the unexpected diagnosis of omega as his second gender. These categories — alpha, omega and beta — can also be called that. His parents, an ordinary beta-gendered couple, had never been able to sense any pheromones, so they didn’t think there was anything wrong with their son. Even though, in families of betas, the most common thing was for children to have the same “subgender” as their parents. However, the doctor, a kind omega, informed them that, despite the result, Iruka had no pheromones.
Not even a single trace of pheromones.
Because of this, he never went into heat either. The doctor had never ruled out the possibility of Iruka being able to get pregnant, but he had also stressed that the chances were low, given that even though he was omega, he didn’t have any of the traits belonging to the category in question. Faced with his parents’ concern, the doctor assured them that it wasn't difficult to resolve the issue: Iruka could simply live as if he were a beta, just as the rest of his family originally was.
Since then, that’s how he’s been getting on with his life. He graduated normally from high school and automatically entered higher education with a degree in Biology. He also graduated with merit and, for some years now, he has been working at a private elementary school in Tokyo, Japan, his hometown. His parents were immigrants from Brazil, but Iruka was born and raised in Japan. As he had managed to establish himself well in the country, his parents decided to return to their homeland — and now they lived in a house in the countryside of the state of São Paulo. Iruka visits them once a year, even with the high ticket prices. Anyway, he was now a 26-year-old young adult with what you might call a chaotic love life.
Being a defective omega, Iruka had explored all kinds of people since coming of age. He’d dated alphas, omegas and betas, but had never managed to hit it off with anyone. He had never blamed the second genders. He knew the problem was with himself — and his personal issues. He couldn’t help feeling frustrated a lot of the time that he had been born this way. How could he, of all people in the world, be born an omega without being able to perform the basic functions of an omega? It didn't make any sense. It even seemed like a bad joke from the universe.
“It would be easier if I had simply been born as a beta instead of having to act like one,” he often thought. In this very moment, in the teachers’ room of the school where he worked and completely alone for now, the thought entered his head. The night before, he had met a delicate-complexioned and extremely handsome omega. The conversation between the two of them had flowed well, and after they’d exchanged a few kisses, the bastard had to make the following comment:
— You're so handsome, it's almost a crime you're not an omega like me.
Iruka dismissed him, of course. That shouldn't be considered a compliment. Not in a million years. What was that guy thinking?!
— Tsk. — He let it slip as his thoughts took him far away. He was so far away that he didn't even notice when someone else entered the room. That person was a long-time friend of Iruka’s, an omega with vivid scarlet eyes and long black hair called Yuhi Kurenai. She was married for some years and tied to an alpha, Sarutobi Asuma. She was a teacher, like Iruka, and her husband was a fireman. They were a perfect match, to be honest.
— Iruka? —She called his name once, realizing that he was completely absorbed in no particular point of the place. There was a giant pile of students’ exams in front of him on the table. — Iruka? Iruka-sensei... —Kurenai hummed, still without an answer. Not satisfied, she suddenly approached him, passing one of her arms in a sudden movement across his slender shoulders — You're thinking about your date last night, hm? How was it, huh?
Iruka's shock was comical. He jumped up, even though he was sitting down, and cast a deadly glance at Kurenai.
— It was a real disaster. — He lamented, sighing and closing his eyes. Kurenai sat down next to him, a genuinely worried expression taking over her beautiful face.
— Again...? — Iruka opened his eyes and stared at her, not happy. — I'm sorry. But last week was a disaster too, you know. You said it yourself...
— I know, I know. And I also know what you're going to say: that I'm the problem! But the thing is, Kurenai, I just haven't found the right person yet! He or she has to be out there. — He said with conviction, which drew a giggle from her.
— It's true. Know that Asuma and I are rooting for you. -—She paused. — Oh, are you going to be able to have dinner at the house on Friday? I need to know, because some of Asuma’s friends have already confirmed...
— I'm going. You can confirm it. — He smiled gently. — But, you know, Kurenai, back to that subject... Maybe the problem is me, indeed. In fact, I'm a defect just by existing. — She was one of the only people who knew that disastrous fact about his personal life. Kurenai's gaze hardened on him and she clasped his forearm over the table.
— Don't ever say that again. It's not your second gender that defines you, Iruka. Much less whether you're worthy of love or not. You deserve it because you're amazing. Not because you're an omega or an alpha. — Iruka nodded, but a small part of him knew that it was easy for her to say that because the fault didn't lie with her. However, he didn’t want to sound cruel to his best friend.
— Thank you. — So he thanked her, squeezing her hand over his forearm. They exchanged confiding smiles, remaining seated. — I've got a lot of exams to grade... — Iruka stretched and stood up, walking over to the bench in the corner of the room that held the most precious thing in a teacher’s office: the bottle of coffee. - Would you like some coffee?
- Do I really need to say my answer? — Rule number one about teaching: never refuse a cup of coffee. Iruka poured two plastic cups and, as he turned his ankles to go back to the table, he did it badly. Which means he almost tripped. Typical of him...
The result was the worst: he spilled coffee on his newest white sweater.
He was overcome by a sudden urge to cry. Kurenai, alarmed by the situation but also wanting to laugh, immediately got up to help her friend in trouble. But she couldn’t do anything, because at that moment, Headmaster Hiruzen - and coincidentally Kurenai's father-in-law - entered the room. The old man appraised Iruka from head to toe and scratched his throat.
— Uh, Iruka-sensei... — He began, somewhat seriously. — There's a father in my office who wants to talk to you. Alone.
Oh, good. That's exactly what he needed most.
— A father...? — Iruka muttered, and, remembering the situation he was in, he threw away the empty coffee cup and handed the other one to Kurenai, who was still chuckling.
— Yeah. — Hiruzen scratched his throat. — He didn't explain why, but he's Sakura's father. Hatake Sakura.
Iruka arched his eyebrows slightly. Sakura was one of his best students in 9th grade at the moment, and she was also an extremely intelligent girl. Although it didn’t seem obvious, the teacher could imagine why her father had come to the school. Precisely because of this, he also imagined that the conversation might not be exactly pleasant, precisely because Iruka had dared to talk about a personal matter with the girl a few days ago.
Relationships. Love relationships.
Considering the principal’s tense posture, the omega had already imagined how irritated that father must be. He let out another long sigh.
— I’ll fix everything, sir. — He bowed to the man and hurried out of the room. Hiruzen squinted at Kurenai, an impassive expression on his face.
— I don't think there's anything to be corrected... — The principal muttered.
Kurenai listened, but she didn't understand anything, even though she also knew Sakura. Just as she knew her father... But the omega didn’t even have time to explain anything to Iruka, while he was walking determinedly to the principal’s office, where Hatake Kakashi was waiting for the famous Iruka-sensei.
Chapter 2: Hatake Kakashi
Summary:
Iruka meets Sakura's father, also known as Mr. Hatake. Also known as Kakashi.
Notes:
helloooooo!!!!!!!
update came quickly because i am thrilled with this fic, tbh! i've got a lot of ideas hehe
i am also open to constructive criticism. i love to hear what you guys are thinking!!!!!!i thought the fic would be small, with 10 chapters, but i think it will be longer... but not sure until what number YET...
anyway, hope you enjoy!!!! kisses!!!!!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
When Kakashi held newborn Sakura in his arms, the first thought that came into his mind was: “She’s so small, but she’s real.” He had been tracking his best friend Rin’s pregnancy from the moment she began to suspect she was pregnant. Sakura’s biological father was unknown; Rin hadn’t even told him the news, since little Sakura was the result of a night of casual sex. Kakashi still remembered the lecture Obito had given their friend, years and years ago — almost fiften years ago, to be more specific. He remembered all this and much more with a fondness that didn’t really fit in his chest.
Both Rin, his best friend, and Obito, his first and only love until now, had become just that: memories. Now, only Kakashi and Sakura were left, a family that, despite the losses, moved on every day with a dynamic of great love. Kakashi loved his daughter with everything in him, and would do anything for her: literally anything. She was the memory in person of someone very special to him, and, not only that, he loved her for who she was. Sakura is an incredible girl. Kakashi’s pride in his daughter matches the love and affection he feels towards her.
Last year, on her fifteenth birthday, Sakura was diagnosed as an omega. The discovery of the second gender varies from person to person and Kakashi took his daughter to be diagnosed when one of her naughtier friends, Naruto, suddenly said at a dinner at their house that the girl smelled nauseatingly of vanilla. Being an alpha, Kakashi knew immediately that it was his daughter’s pheromones being produced and emitted. In large quantities, the emission of pheromones indicates that the omega’s heat is about to begin — at dinner, this was not the case with Sakura, fortunately. He hadn’t smelled any pheromones for a long time. Not since Obito had passed away, but it was a subject that still left his throat tight and made his eyes sting with invasive tears. He had promised both Rin and Obito that he would always take care of Sakura. Until the day he would join them on the other side.
But for now, he had to deal with his own history on Earth and, of course, Sakura's trajectory.
As a teenager, she was going through a rather complicated phase in her life. Kakashi, even though he had been a very well-prepared policeman since his twenties, was not prepared to have to deal with the emotional problems of teenagers. He never thought he’d have any trouble finding advice or being an excellent listener, but the good old truth was: teenagers aren’t easy. Especially one with a strong personality as Sakura — he was proud of his daughter, but sometimes her stubbornness made him want to bang his head against the wall when he didn’t know exactly how to deal with what she was feeling.
And what was the reason for all this? Well, that's where the figure of Iruka enters the narrative.
Lately, Kakashi and Sakura had been having some conflicts at home. The girl seemed to have rebelled against him, not in the sense that she was just being a disobedient spoiled brat, but clearly Sakura wasn’t feeling understood by her father. It turned out that she was actually frustrated by something that was happening at school: the girl was having problems with her own feelings, love feelings. She could’'t declare herself to the person she liked and so felt very anxious all the time. And every time Kakashi asked too many questions about it, trying to figure things out, Sakura always rolled her eyes and said things like:
— I don't need to talk to my father about this, do I? I mean it.
And Kakashi decided to be quiet, even though it was the exact opposite of what he wanted to do. Sakura, his beautiful little girl, was putting up walls towards him that the alpha wanted to destroy. But he knew destroying them would be too abrupt. Things got even worst when she decided to lock herself in her room whenever she got home and stay there, absorbed in the terrible world of cell phones and social media. As he had to work, often on call, he sometimes didn’t even have time to talk to his little girl properly, while she was in the care of Anko, a childhood friend of his too.
However, last week, on a random day, Sakura got into her father’s car with a lighter aura than usual. She was even smiling at him and asked how he was and how his day had been. Blinking his eyes a few times in amazement, Kakashi said it was good.
— That's great, dad! Mine too. I’ve got lots of homework to do, let’s go home! - She said, still exuding that unusual cheerfulness considering the last few days.
Sakura didn’t complain that her father had made soup for dinner again, and she offered to put the dishes in the dishwasher herself. Taking advantage of the happy and relaxed atmosphere of the moment, the alpha, obviously curious, approached Sakura after they ate.
— Did something happen at school today? You seem... Calmer. — Then he mentally prayed that her mood would remain the same. Sakura let out a little laugh at her father’s caution and shrugged, as if it wasn't at all unusual:
— It was Iruka-sensei, my science teacher. One day I was feeling a bit down, because of Sas- Some things there. But he told me that it's normal to feel lost, that sometimes you think no one will ever like you the way you are, but that it’s not true. He also said that the right way comes along. — She wiped away a lot of the conversation she’d had with the older omega, but that had basically been the message. And Sakura felt a lightness inside her chest, as if Iruka had been a renowned therapist for years. He didn’t have to be; he just understood teenagers very well.
It had stayed with Kakashi all week, until today. The way his daughter had lovingly repeated the words, as if they had been a blanket in the middle of a hurricane, had touched him deeply. He had never met someone who had managed to speak to Sakura in the way that teacher had, in a way that seemed to have really reached her. Although he would have liked to have been that person, Kakashi was a man who knew his own limitations; he wasn’t very proud, so his ego wasn’t hurt. And for a long time he had been trying to catch up with Sakura, but he just couldn’t. He didn’t want to feel that kind of frustration any more, he wanted to be the safe haven for his daughter as he had promised Obito and Rin.
That’s why he was at school now. He hadn’t needed to make an appointment to meet Hiruzen, he was a long-time acquaintance of the principal's son, Asuma. He explained to the old man his reasons for wanting to meet Iruka, and the principal asked him for a moment to call the brunette.
Thanks to his trained senses, Kakashi could hear the determined footsteps heading for the door. He settled into his chair - he was looking particularly dapper today. He hadn’t been on duty the day before, so he was wearing an outfit that was considered too casual for his taste: a white button-down shirt with long sleeves under an elegant plain green vest, with dark brown tailored pants, which, when he stood up straight, emphasized his six—foot—one height. He was also wearing a hospital mask because, unfortunately, he had woken up with a blocked nose and a dry cough that morning. His platinum hair was tied down as usual. Few people believed the alpha when he said that he had recently turned forty years-old.
The door opened suddenly, revealing the teacher. Iruka-sensei was incredibly younger than Kakashi had imagined, especially after the wise words he had been able to convey to Sakura. He was only a little shorter than Kakashi — exactly one meter seventy—eight — with long brown hair that was tied up in a loose ponytail, revealing that he wore a pair of hoop earrings in his ears. His eyes were the same color as his hair, highlighted by his dark skin tone. A thin scar cut across the bridge of his nose, running from the middle of one cheek to the other in a perfect line that looked much more like a drawing, like someone made it with one’s own hands. He was wearing a white sweater — stained with something Kakashi assumed was coffee; and the stain was still fresh —, dark jeans and a pair of black vans on his feet. He must be under the age of thirty years-old.
— Mr. Hatake. — The timbre of his voice was firm, but gentle at the same time. — I'm sorry for my behavior, I only wanted to help Sakura, I hope you and she can overlook my words! I promise I’ll never again say anything that doesn’t fall within the scope of discipline and homework. — Iruka then began to speak, bowing and standing like that in front of the alpha, without letting Kakashi even say anything such as a greeting. The silver—haired man blinked in surprise.
There was a moment of silence, which, for Iruka, bent over as he was, seemed to last an eternity.
— And why would you do that? — Kakashiss voice was calm, even soft, a little bit low since he was a little sick. Iruka raised his face, a confused expression on his face.
— Isn’t that why you're here...? — The omega’s cheeks began to flush. — Because you’re unhappy about something I said to your daughter...? — His tone of doubt made his voice sound lower, as he raised his whole body, bringing his arms together in front of himself because he didn’t know what exactly to do with them or his hands at that shameful moment.
— No, Iruka-sensei! You've got it all wrong. — Seeing that the teacher made no mention of sitting down, Kakashi stood up and approached him. Iruka noticed the few centimetres of difference between their heights and swallowed: after all, Sakura’s father was one of the most handsome men in the world. Even with the mask partially covering his face, he could still see the pair of dark, black eyes, one of them cut into the eyelid by a scar that could honestly stir up dark fantasies in Iruka. — I'm here to thank you. — The alpha placed his hands in his pockets as he approached, stopping in front of the teacher.
— Thank me? — Iruka couldn’t help but repeat, still confused.
Kakashi nodded, a soft gleam in his eyes as he maintained eye contact with the younger man.
— Didn’t Hiruzen tell you I was here to thank you? — It was Kakashi’s turn to speak with a tone of doubt. Iruka gave an amused smile.
— Yeah, well... I didn’t give him time to tell you. — He decided to be honest, which elicited a chuckle from the alpha beneath his mask. Something in his laugh made Iruka’s whole body shiver. That man was not of this world.
— Well, Sakura told me about what you said to her. Hm, about relationships and insecurities. I wanted to say that it made a difference... She’s much calmer. Even more open to talking to me. I’m not very good at talking, especially with teenagers... — He took one of his hands out of his pocket and brought it to the back of his neck, scratching it with his fingertips in an awkward gesture. — Thank you, then.
Iruka’s heart seemed to want to leap out of his mouth at that set of movements coming from the man in front of him. But all he did was crack a genuinely sincere smile, his brown eyes sparkling with the information. He had always wanted to be the kind of teacher who could really talk to his students, not the kind of teacher who only cared about content and lessons.
— Ah... I’m glad to hear that. Sakura is a very special girl. I’m happy I could help!
— I wanted to give something back. — Kakashi put his hand back in his pocket, his voice still as calm as usual — I thought it would be nice to invite you over for dinner. Just me and her and, of course, you. Very informal. No pressure. Sakura would love that too.
Iruka had expected a lot of things from that conversation, except the path it was taking. He blinked a few times, hesitating for a moment.
— Gee, I... well, you don’t have to, but... sure, yeah. It would be a pleasure.
The alpha was satisfied with the answer, cracking a small smile behind his mask.
— Would you able to come over tomorrow?
— Yes, that’s fine... That's great. — The words seemed to drag in Iruka’s throat, not because he didn’t want to go, but because apparently the silver—haired man in front of him was a kind of gallant he had never seen before. And he had to control himself, after all, he was the father of one of his most dedicated students. — Do you want me to bring something? I’m not particularly good at cooking, but I could bring a drink... Or a dessert...
— I’ve got everything under control. Don’t worry about it. — Kakashi automatically denied it. — You'll be our special guest. — Iruka gave him a small smile. — Please, give me your telephone number so I can send you our address.
— Thank you. And surely, here’s my number. — They exchanged phone numbers politely.
The smell of coffee in the room suddenly seemed to intensify, capable of flooding Kakashi’s sharp nostrils even through his mask. The alpha frowned almost imperceptibly at the increased aroma and stared at the coffee stain on Iruka’s blouse, while placing back his phone inside his pocket. The smell hadn’t been this strong when the teacher had entered the room.
— Hm... Well, that's all I had to say to you, Iruka-sensei. — He broke the silence, pretending not to be bothered by the strange fact. The brunette had crossed his arms in front of his chest, as if he could cover up the brown stain. He couldn't. — I’ll see you tomorrow.
— Right, Mr. Hatake. See you tomorrow. — The younger man replied formally, which drew a sigh from the alpha.
— Kakashi. Just call me Kakashi. — He asked in a soft voice, even with his actual blocked nouse. — “Mr. Hatake” makes me feel old. — He tried to sound casual.
Iruka blushed to the tips of his ears.
— I’m sorry, sir- Kakashi. — He immediately corrected himself, feeling his face heat up. — It’s... A habit. — The gentle smile he then plastered on his face made the alpha smile back, his dark eyes sparkling.
— That’s fine. — The older man replied and then Iruka opened the door to the boardroom for him. Principal Hiruzen was there, waiting patiently like an old bear.
— Iruka-sensei, you can let me escort Kakashi out. — He said to the teacher, who nodded and bowed to them both respectfully. Kakashi walked behind the old man, but then turned to Iruka halfway and waved happily with one of his slender hands.
The gesture made the teacher blush once again, from head to toe. What was wrong with that man? Why did he make Iruka feel that way? Surely it must have been his beauty, his bearing, his education? Beauty? Well, he was wearing a mask, but even a blind man could tell that a man with that tone of voice had no choice but to possess an alpha-male beauty — even with the flu — that would make alphas, omegas and betas drop to their knees and beg not only for attention, but for even a glance from him!
When he returned to the teachers’ room, still flushed and feeling on edge, Kurenai immediately realized that something atypical and not necessarily bad had happened. Since she knew Kakashi well, she could even imagine... A mischievous smile appeared on his red lips.
— How was your conversation with Mr. Hatake? — She said in a teasing tone.
— Uh, well, I have dinner at his house. Tomorrow. — Iruka sounded elated, and began to gesticulate exaggeratedly with his hands. — Me, him and Sakura. He wants to thank me for the, um, advice I gave Sakura last week. It seems he’s struggling to understand the feelings of adolescence and I managed to get Sakura to calm down a bit with a few words... And now they want me to have dinner with them. I don’t even have the clothes for it. — He widened his eyes — I don't even have clothes for that! - He repeated, and immediately picked up the pile of exam papers he was going to correct this afternoon. — I'm going home now! I need to think about what to wear tomorrow! I’ll text you for your opinion, okay? — He carefully stuffed the exam papers into his backpack, which was gigantic and heavy. He closed the zipper with difficulty and put it on his back, still having a monologue directed at Kurenai, who looked at him perplexed, but didn’t interrupt because she had known Iruka for a few years. She knew he wouldn’t let her speak anyway. — I never imagined that Sakura’s father would be, you know, so... charming. I stared at him like an idiot, oh, Iruka, you’re pathetic. — He scolded himself and sighed — See you tomorrow, Kurenai, I need to sort out my life urgently. Wish me luck.
And after Iruka had left, the teachers’ room fell absolutely silent. Kurenai blinked her scarlet eyes once, twice, three times.
— I just wanted to tell him that I know Kakashi. — She mumbled to herself, still processing everything her friend had dumped on her in the space of two moments and then disappeared. Like the a strong midnight wind.
Wednesday's urgent mission: find the perfect outfit for dinner at the Hatakes’ house on Thursday (i.e. tomorrow).
Notes:
obs: if it was confusing to understand their ages I will leave them here:
kakashi: 40 years-old (hes really a DILF)
iruka: 26 years-old
sakura, naruto, sasuke (etc): 15 or 16 years-old, sakura is 15, but some of them will be one year older (naruto is 16)
asuma: also 40 years old
kurenai: 35 years (I wanted to make iruka younger than everyone else hehe)
Chapter 3: Chibi
Summary:
Iruka has a cat named Chibi.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Iruka arrived home like a hurricane of anxiety. He dropped his heavy backpack on the floor at once, which made a loud enough bang to abruptly wake up Chibi, the cat he had adopted last year. She was still a kitten when Iruka found her rummaging through the garbage in the building where he lived and, having a soft heart, he couldn’t let her go on living on the streets. He took her in carefully, afraid that she would be skittish, but, incredibly, the kitten had accepted Iruka from day one. Chibi was absolutely affectionate with her owner, rubbing her white fur on the omega’s legs whenever he was at home. Also, she always stared at him with those instigating blue eyes, as if she really understood what Iruka often said to her. And, yes, he talked to his cat a lot.
— Hi, Chibi. I’m sorry. — He spoke affectionately to her, apologizing for the noise. She meowed as he approached, purring even before he crouched down and stroked her back, while the cat rubbed herself between his legs. She let out another meow that brought a smile to the brunette’s face. — I’m glad to be home too... But now we have a very important matter to deal with! — He picked her up before getting up and walked to the bedroom, where he put Chibi on the bed. — Tomorrow I have dinner at a student’s house and, well, there’s also her father, who was the one that invited me and, gee, how can I explain him? He’s probably an alpha, but not only that... He doesn’t even look like he belongs in this world, Chibi! — She responded again with a meow, this time more disinterested. The teacher had a habit of moving his hands excessively as he spoke, as well as varying the tones of his voice. A habit of teaching teenagers every day for some years now. — But I’ll stop thinking about him, he’s the father of a student and he’s probably married. His partner will be there, gee, what an... Idiot I am. — He bit his lower lip, restraining himself. Why didn’t he think about the possibility of Kakashi being married? Better question: why did he think Kakashi was single? He couldn’t explain why he was nervous, but ever since he had met Kakashi, or rather Mr. Hatake, something inside him had definitely been disorganized. — It’s very hot in here... — He got rid of the stained sweater and threw it on the floor; he was wearing a plain white blouse underneath. He should have taken it off to meet Sakura’s father, why the hell hadn't he done that? He took the opportunity to tie his hair into a high ponytail with the elastic band on his wrist. He always carried it there. — I’m ridiculous, Chibi. — He sank his face into his hands. How could he think Sakura’s father was single? And worse still, even if he was, when in a million years would he give Iruka, his daughter’s teacher, a chance? — I want to disappear... I even told Kurenai that he was charming... She’s probably laughing at me now too... What was I thinking? — Even though Kakashi himself had said that it would only be three people, Iruka was no longer thinking straight.
He had turned into a confused teenager in such a short space of time!
Iruka’s room, so that we can better understand where he is now, reflected his state of mind. Usually, he managed to keep it fairly organized, but during exam periods, for example, his room would turn into absolute chaos. Now, it could be considered partially organized. It wasn’t a very big room — just as Iruka’s apartment wasn’t very big either — but it was quite comfortable and, most importantly: it looked just like him.
The double bed, located in the corner of the room and just below the square-shaped window, was covered with a moss-green bedspread that was already a little faded from use. A pile of books and notebooks rested on the bedside table, sharing space with a warm lamp and a mug that had been forgotten from last night, with remnants of chamomile tea.
The walls had discreet photos and posters: an old engraving of a temple, a photo with colleagues from college, another with the class from last year. The desk was in a state of near-collapse: corrected exams on one side, exams yet to be corrected on the other, and in the middle of it all, a small box of colored pencils that he used to decorate motivational notes to students, next to a series of stickers of gold stars and silver hearts to stick next to the notes, which he never wrote in red pen, but varied with different colors between pink, purple and even green.
His closet was one of those with sliding doors, one of which was jammed and creaked when opened. A solitary sock lurked under the bed, ignored for days. Even so, the atmosphere was extremely welcoming: perhaps it was the faint smell of fabric softener in the air, or the fluffy rug where Chibi slept curled up and, whenever Iruka lays down, she won’t hesitate to jump on him.
In the living room, where he had entered, the scene was not very different: a two-seater sofa covered with a blanket to protect it from the cat’s hair, a bookcase and plants trying to survive in pots he had bought at a local market a few days ago. Iruka didn’t have a TV, he had decided not to spend money on something he wouldn’t end up using. Fortunately, he was great at pirating series and movies whenever he had some free time to spend watching something.
The kitchen was tiny, even smaller than the rest of the rooms, but functional, as well as being built into the living room. It was the kind that forced you to turn on your axis to pick up a plate, turn the rice and open the fridge. Despite its small size, this was where Iruka spent most of his mornings off, especially when he decided to make pancakes just because he was in a good mood. They weren’t the best pancakes in the world, but he had never been a very fussy person either (fortunately).
The cupboards had paint peeling off a little at the edges, revealing previous layers of white paint. The worktop was taken up by small appliances fighting for space: a toaster, an old blender with a crack in the glass cup, and an always-on coffee maker, his faithful companion on every night of marking exams and the only real luxury item, according to Iruka himself, that he had saved up to buy.
On the fridge were a series of kitten magnets and shopping lists scribbled in hasty letters. The door of one of the upstairs cupboards wouldn’t close properly and would occasionally open on its own; this was a common problem in rented apartments, which he hadn’t noticed when he spoke to the realtor. On top of the cupboard lived plastic pots without lids and lids without pots, but eventually Iruka improvised with what was left — and it worked!
The sink almost always had a cup or two resting in the drainer, and the sponge had, without pride, been in need of replacement for at least a week. It turned out that the teacher wasn’t in the habit of doing the dishes because, shamefully, he barely cooked. He preferred a thousand times to order in or stop at a ramen place on the corner of the building block: Ichiraku.
On one wall, a calendar hung with a cat sleeping each month, marking school meetings and students’ birthdays in crooked handwriting, sometimes with emojis drawn on it. And in a corner of the floor, a bowl of water and a bowl of food for Chibi, both pink, which Iruka had lovingly bought last month — he often changed Chibi because he always came across one that was cuter than the last. He didn’t spend much on himself, but it was a different story with his cat. As well as the carpet in the bedroom and the food and kibble containers he kept changing, she had various toys and scratching posts scattered around the Whole apartment. The professor had made sure that the kitten would never get bored, since most weekdays he left early and came home late. He feared that she would spend too much time alone, but Chibi was extremely happy in her own way. That should be enough for him, but it didn’t mean that he would stop looking for ways to make her even happier. Ever since his parents moved back to Brazil, although he considered himself to have plenty of friends, Iruka had felt lonely. The emptiness that the distance between him and his family had created in his heart had not been easily filled, that is, until he found Chibi rummaging through those garbage cans...
Returning to our dear teacher’s current state of despair, he had decided to take a very rational measure, after a few minutes of whimpering with his face sunk in his hands: he opened his closet of clothes, picked them all up — yes, all of them — like someone who wants to embrace the world and threw them all on the bed. Chibi was swallowed up by the clothes and left the pile with an irritated meow. Iruka let out a little laugh when he saw the cat’s condition.
— I’m sorry, love. — He placed her on the shaggy carpet and stared at the pile of clothes. He let out a long sigh, his hands resting on his hips. — Come on. I still need to make a good impression tomorrow... Even if I am naturally pathetic... — He rummaged through that gigantic pile; there were a lot of clothes there that he hadn’t worn in years, since high school maybe — Plaid sweater, no, too casual... — He discarded the garment on the floor, not throwing it at Chibi by lucky centimeters. She watched the brunette with her blue eyes wide and her tail swaying slowly from side to side — This one looks like I’m going for a job interview. — He held out a short-sleeved button-down blouse with a pocket on the left breast, and it had a polo collar. Iruka didn’t know exactly what kind of clothes he could wear to make a good impression — This one would look like I’m trying to be younger... — He picked up an old blouse he’d worn a lot in college, with an anime print on it. — I need to be serious. Professional... — He pulled out a black tank top from the pile — Hm, no... Definitely not! — He sighed again, returned the tank top to the pile and then lay down on top of the clothes — I’m not going anymore. — He was lamenting when he heard the familiar sound of his own phone ringing; the sound was standard for his type of mobile device, nothing over the top or too personalized, apart from the device vibrating in his trouser pocket. He sat down on the floor with the device in his hands —Kurenai... — He said his friend’s name out loud. She had been quick to call, especially since Iruka had said he would contact her about the clothes. Now he was ashamed of himself, but he answered anyway. — Hello, Kurenai?
“IRUKA!” Her voice came out so loudly on the other end of the line that he had to move the phone a good few centimeters away from his ear, frowning. “Er, I’m sorry. I got carried away. Hi! Iruka, have you got something on your mind? You left school like a hurricane, you didn’t even let me say anything... I’m used to it, but I was going to tell you something important!”
— Something important? I’m sorry, really, I... I didn’t leave that meeting thinking straight. Kakas— I mean, Mr. Hatake, he was so polite that I was acting like a fool who had never received attention from an alpha in his life. — He closed his eyes, forcing a fake cry — I was ridiculous in front of you, forget the things I said, please... — He heard the omega laugh on the other end of the line.
“It's okay, ‘Ruka. You weren’t ridiculous, Kakashi is Kakashi, indeed.” Iruka remained silent, even though he was surprised that she called him by his first name so easily. “What I was going to tell you is that I’ve known Mr. Hatake for many years, you anxious boy. He’s one of Asuma's oldest friends.” Iruka arched his eyebrows, genuinely surprised by the information.
— What? Why didn't you just grab me by the shoulders and tell me?
“I tried, okay? You’re not easy to interrupt...” She paused, laughing softly. “Anyway, I just want to tell you that Kakashi is a really nice guy. Sakura is his life, so you’ve probably done a great job with your advice to her. If he’s asked you to have dinner with them...”
Iruka smiled to himself, but then a thought came to him that he had to immediately verbalize, unable to contain himself.
— What about his partner? What’s he or she like? I want to impress everyone. — Kakashi had clearly said that it would only be the three of them, but Iruka still wanted to be sure. He was feeling very ridiculous for having assumed so many things before, he didn’t know if he could trust his own judgment anymore; even if it had been based on the other person’s clear words.
It took Kurenai a good few moments to reply. The seconds seemed like hours to the omega, who felt his heart beating harder and harder in his chest. What was that damned feeling?
“That’s another thing I was going to tell you. Kakashi doesn’t have a partner. He was married once, for a long time, but the omega died ten years ago. Don’t say anything about it, ‘Ruka, I know you wouldn’t mean any harm, but it’s a very delicate subject. Both for him and for Sakura, okay? It all happened in a very horrible way. I still remember...” She sighed audibly. “You wouldn’t ask about it out of spite, but it would be a very heavy moment for them. So I’m sparing you from causing a stir, okay? You owe me one!”
— I owe you millions. I don’t disagree that it would be very possible for something like this to happen... — He would be lying if he said he wasn’t interested in Sakura and Kakashi’s family history. At the same time, his heart sank in his chest. The girl was one of his best students, definitely one of his favorites too. He would never have imagined that she would have had to go through such a trauma at such a young age. And Kakashi, losing his partner in a way that, Kurenai hadn’t described because it wasn’t her right to do so, but according to her, it had been horrible, and knowing these details of their personal lives, even superficially, made Iruka feel a little shaken, considering how empathetic he naturally was. He stood up, going back to fiddling with his clothes while holding the phone bare-handed, pressed between his ear and shoulder. — How did Kakashi and Asuma meet?
“Oh, it was military training, 20 years ago. Kakashi is a policeman.”
Policeman.
He was holding a pair of pants when he heard those words. As soon as Kurenai finished her sentence, the garment slipped from Iruka’s fingers automatically, resting on top of the pile. He stared at nothing, at no specific point in the room, while his mind involuntarily worked to produce images of Mr. Hatake in a policeman’s uniform. Several images. And in all of them, he was wearing a black mask, because Iruka hadn’t seen his face yet. This, in a way, further increased the heat that the omega inevitably felt rising through his body and settling on his face, which automatically began to heat up to a degree that had never happened to him before.
“Iruka? Hellooooo, are you still there?”
Kurenai’s voice sounded distant until he remembered that they were on a call.
— Hm, m-sorry. — He stammered as he pulled himself together — Kurenai, I’m going to have to hang up. I'm deciding on my outfit for tomorrow. Wish me luck... — He could barely think of the words.
“You don’t need luck! Everything will work out... Did you keep thinking about Kakashi in uniform, or don’t I know you well enough, Iruka-sensei?”
The omega blushed once more, his cheeks tinged with the now familiar blush. Thank God they were talking on their cell phones or, if it were in person, the woman would make fun of him for the rest of his life.
— Bye! Send a kiss to my beautiful niece and a hug to Asuma... — Kurenai had a five-year-old daughter, Mirai, who was absolutely in love with Iruka, by the way.
“Hey, you can’t ignore me—” He hung up on her, threw his cell phone on the bed and went back to focusing on the perfect choice for dinner the next night. The next moment, his cell phone vibrated with two messages. Iruka had to look for it again for a while, already expecting angry messages from Kurenai. But he was very wrong — the messages were not from the black-haired woman.
[Unsaved number]: [19:07]: Good evening, it's Kakashi.
[Unsaved number]: [19:08]: Our address in the next message. We're expecting you tomorrow, Iruka-sensei. 19h30, ok?
{...}
{A year and a few months ago}
In fact, it had been a little over a year since Iruka had met Chibi. It was a typically cold December night. He could guess that it was 4°C or even less as he drove through the busy streets even at that time. Iruka had owned a car since graduating from college, a recent model Yaris Hatch in a bluish color, a graduation present from his parents before they returned to their homeland. As his gloved fingers made the necessary turn to reach the street, Iruka felt his heart sink in his chest.
His parents had been gone from Japan for two years by then. The o mega had visited them once a year since then, but the daily longing for the little details — especially them — was sometimes overwhelming. He felt lonely especially in the evening, when he wasn’t at school. On that particular day, he had agreed to spend the afternoon at school to help some students who were struggling in science and had lost track of time. As he’d been in a terrible mood for a few days, it was good for him to distract himself, even if a little.
December used to be his favorite time of year. His mother would bake the most delicious warm sweets while his father would tell him thousands of interesting stories from the books he loved. Iruka’s parents were intellectuals, just like him. His father was a historian and his mother a journalist. They always encouraged him to do whatever he wanted, and he always wanted to be a teacher. From an early age, he was sure of his vocation. He wanted to reach people in the same way his parents had guided him all his life, to be the protagonists of his own life — it was never really about teaching content, although Iruka also loved science. Besides, if he ever had children, he’d like to be as good a father as the ones he had. In any case, he missed his family terribly, especially in December.
He had already visited them in the middle of the year, so he wouldn’t be able to go again for the holidays. He would never get used to it. As many great friends as he had, like Kurenai, who invited him to join in the festivities at their respective homes, Iruka still felt... incomplete. He knew it was a void that only his parents would fill, but he was an adult now and had to deal with it.
He parked the car inside the garage. He was wearing heavy cold clothes and, as well as gloves, a red scarf wrapped tightly around his neck, even covering his mouth and nose. A black coat covered his torso, the typical jeans and vans on his feet. Even covered from head to toe, he still felt absurdly cold. He had pulled the handbrake and turned off the car, and put his hands on the steering wheel. He leaned his forehead against it and finally, after that day in which he had been relatively distracted, he let the tears run down his face, wetting the beginning of his scarf.
As much as he reaffirmed to himself that he was an adult now, he would never get used to that kind of feeling. The emptiness. The pain of longing. He felt so desperate just to feel his mother’s embrace again and, even though he knew he would feel that embrace again eventually, it was frustrating not to be able to have it every day like he used to. On difficult days, the only thing that could cure him was her hug. And today hadn’t been a difficult day, but the pain was still there — and that intensified it even more. For nothing could make him forget how desolate he felt at times like these. Not that Iruka wanted his parents to be “held hostage by h”im in Japan, not least because he didn’t want to go to Brazil to live, but that didn’t diminish the longing that seemed to suffocate him at times like these. When he just exploded.
He remained in that position, crying in an indeed very ugly way, his shoulders shaking slightly, for a good few minutes. He let all the feelings that were crushing his chest escape through his tears, at least he could bring a little relief from that moment of crying. He leaned back against the bench, sobbing softly, and pulled down his scarf to scratch his now stuffy nose. He dried his tears with his gloved fingertips and took a deep breath before getting out of the car, despite his swollen dark eyes. He had to stop by the concierge to pick up some parckages, at least his online shopping had arrived that afternoon and he could feel momentarily fulfilled as he opened them — a series of trinkets he had acquired in an outburst of “I deserve it” while browsing Shopee.
He picked up the box and, balancing it with his heavy work backpack, was determined to take the elevator, lock himself in his room after entering the apartment and drown himself in Netflix series accompanied by an instant noodle that he would lazily prepare in three minutes. However, as he was getting ready, he heard an almost inaudible “meow” outside the main entrance door. There was no personal doorman in Iruka’s building; all matters of this nature were dealt with by a concierge with whom residents and visitors communicated via the intercom, but the person was not physically in the building. He left his backpack and the box on the floor, pressed the button to leave and followed the sound of the meowing.
Next to the building was a corner with a rubbish dump. Iruka immediately recognized a strange movement in the trash can and, cautiously approaching, it didn’t take him long to see a tiny ball of yellowish fur inside.
It was a kitten looking for food. And its fur wasn’t yellow, it was just... Very dirty. And starving.
Iruka's heart sank in his chest. Again.
Still, he had read an article once about the caution needed when approaching street animals. They could be skittish for any number of reasons, the main one being that they were often mistreated and, if they attacked or, worse still, bit him, he would have to rush to get a rabies vaccination as soon as possible. And that was the last thing he wanted to do that night.
However, as he approached carefully and slowly, the kitten seemed to have other plans. She jumped up onto the edge of the garbage can and stared back at Iruka with her big, bright blue eyes, meowing as if she was asking him directly for food. The brunette realized that the kitten was even smaller than he had first seen.
— You’re so small... — He murmured and, after looking both ways, reached out to pick her up. He felt he shouldn’t be afraid, with her staring at him so vulnerably. And so it happened, she accepted Iruka’s touch as if she had known him for a long time. —You’re just a baby. — He felt his eyes sting with tears again. A little animal like that in the cold wasn’t fair. He bit his lip lightly. — I’m taking you with me. And you’ll be called Chibi, because you’re tiny.
And so Iruka took Chibi home, fed her warm milk and cleaned her in extremely warm water. He had felt a special connection with the kitten since that first night, especially because she had appeared like a glimmer of light at a time when he had believed with all his heart that he would sink into deep sadness. Chibi prevented him of that.
Notes:
thank you all for the kudos and comments <3
Chapter 4: Pakkun
Summary:
Kakashi has a dog named Pakkun.
Notes:
hope you enjoy <3 thanks for the kudos and comments and bookmarks!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
And I'll be in denial for at least a little while
What about the plans we made?
Hatake Kakashi’s day starts very early, even when he is not on duty as a police officer.
The alpha wakes up religiously every day at 5 a.m. The reason? He likes to run at least five kilometers around the neighborhood where he lives before starting his day properly. It’s a long-standing habit that began as a recommendation from his psychologist ten years ago, so that he could distract his mind from unpleasant thoughts. He easily turned the suggestion into a routine because it worked well. In addition, he always had the faithful company of Pakkun, a small pug who would turn nine-years-old next spring. He’s not exactly young, but he can still keep up with his owner during those five kilometers. When they return home, Pakkun takes refuge in Sakura’s room, who remains asleep even with the puppy’s invasion.
Kakashi adopted him shortly after Obito’s death. He saw him at a shelter and, even though he hadn’t planned to, ended up taking the dog home — of course, Sakura was absurdly happy at the time; she was seven years old when Pakkun became part of the family. The shelter employee said that he was the only one of the litter that hadn’t been adopted yet because he was “too small” and “didn’t seem smart.” Kakashi replied with, “Maybe he’s just waiting for someone quieter than him.” He had been captivated by those little eyes and that expression that seemed to say “I understand everything, I’m just too lazy to show it” from the very first moment he saw him.
Returning to Kakashi’s daily run, which lasts about 25 minutes — yes, he is quite fast, due to his previous experience and the endurance he has built up as a result of his profession — he prepares breakfast, setting the table for two. He takes a rather long cold shower, lasting at least 20 minutes, and gets ready. If he is going to work that day, he puts on his uniform, while if he is off duty, he always wears something casual according to his own criteria: which, for him, casual means tailored pants and long-sleeved button-down shirts, for example. That morning, he wasn’t going to the police station, so he dressed in a white button-down shirt and black pants. On his feet, he wore only socks, because he was indoors. His shoes, as well as Sakura’s, are all in a cabinet built by his father — Hatake Sakumo — next to the front door. He is usually ready around 5:45 a.m., and since Sakura won’t wake up for a while — her classes start at 8:30 a.m. sharp — Kakashi takes advantage of this time to read.
He has always been an avid reader since childhood.
Kakashi’s father, Hatake Sakumo, had also been a police officer like him. Currently, he was retired and lived a few houses away from Kakashi. This short distance between the two resulted in unexpected visits from the older man with tools and an explanation like, “Sakura-chan told me her shower was leaking.”
And he always managed to fix it.
Sakumo was not the type of person who talked much about feelings — just like Kakashi — but he was an alpha who was extremely loyal to his family. His family always came first on his list of priorities, and he showed this through gestures, mainly practical actions like this, in short, through acts of service.
This was also Kakashi’s own love language.
In any case, he had been his son’s main driving force for reading. He realized that he was into books, and began to always buy whatever he wanted to read, even when Kakashi didn’t say anything — and he never said anything.
Sakumo had raised his son completely alone: his wife had died when Kakashi was still a small child, and his father didn’t talk much about her. He only knew that his parents had loved each other very much. Deeply. The kind of love you only saw in movies — that’s what he knew from what other family members and acquaintances had told him.
Even when Obito was torn from Kakashi’s life, Sakumo didn’t talk much about the event with his son. Neither about his wife. Neither about the feelings he now shared, unfortunately, with Kakashi. He had only shared, in his own way, that he understood his pain at losing the partner he had loved ardently, through a hug. The last time they hugged was at the hospital.
Kakashi, like his father, was a calm person, even too calm — which was a great advantage considering that both had chosen a career in the police force — but they definitely did not know how to love little. That did not exist in the Hatake language. They give themselves completely, body and soul, to the people they love.
As fate likes to play with human beings, it also likes to take away the Hatakes’ partners. Kakashi found this to be an extremely distasteful joke, and an absurdly painful one.
He had learned to love reading from his elderly father. Although they didn’t talk much, the two loved each other very much and had a healthy relationship. That’s why, in his early morning routine, Kakashi always fits in some reading time. This time corresponds to the interval between when he finishes getting ready and when Sakura wakes up: he has over an hour to devote to his greatest hobby since childhood.
Currently, the silver-haired man is reading a work called “The Pillow Book.” It is, in short, a collection of notes and lists written by Sei Shōnagon, who was a lady of the imperial court in Japan during the 10th century. Her attention to the details of everyday life transformed even the dust under the sun into a poem.
Kakashi had a ritual for reading: he didn’t do it in just any corner of the house, even though it was a hobby for fun. He would go to his office, a large room where he kept his books, reports, and other paperwork from his life as a police officer, in a very personal mess. He sat down in the chair in front of the desk, and there, on the smooth, dark wooden surface, was the book, with its light-colored cover, already somewhat worn from use. Even though it was his first time reading it, Kakashi had acquired reading habits that were not very pleasant for books — but the important thing was that he liked them, such as folding the corners of the pages to mark where he had stopped.
He opened it slowly, on a page marked with the typical, familiar little fold at the corner. His eyes scanned the lines of words slowly, enjoying that introspective moment in which only two variables existed: him and the book.
“Things that make the heart beat: Seeing sunlight filtered through the leaves of a tree. Hearing someone knock on the door when you’re not expecting visitors.”
He smiled as he read the beginning of the page. It was a small, almost imperceptible smile, just at the corners of his mouth, but it lit up the dark irises of his eyes. Kakashi had a habit of smiling more with his eyes than with his mouth.
That passage obviously reminded him almost automatically of his own father.
The man who, like him, had silver hair and kind eyes, and showed up unannounced at his house every now and then to do something for Sakura or to leave something his son and granddaughter liked to eat. His visits were unusual, but always celebrated. Sakura always worries when her grandfather doesn’t show up, and when she wouldn’t call him, it was because she was going to check on him in person to make sure he was okay. With each passing day, her behavior seemed to align more and more with Obito’s personality. While this warmed Kakashi’s heart, it also undeniably broke it a little.
Because he missed his partner very much.
He turned his focus back to his reading, which he had barely begun, but had already put his whole mind to work to remember.
“Things that make the heart tremble softly: a memory that comes back as if it had never gone away.”
He felt his chest tighten. Not with sadness, or rather, it wasn’t just sadness. It was that feeling, but mixed with others. It was that calm nostalgia that, when it arises, feels like a wave from a not-so-rough sea, accompanied by a silent pain that is always with Kakashi, but hurts absurdly when he lets it take him over. The memory was clear in the alpha’s mind, who had once again stopped reading to dive into his own thoughts, triggered by the few words on the page.
The three of them were in the car: he was driving, Obito was in the passenger seat, and Sakura, then about three years old at the time, was strapped into her car seat in the back, her little feet dangling in the air. It was a Sunday morning, the sky was clear and beautiful, and their destination was a street fair — the kind Obito loved to drag his family to. The fairs were an activity he had institutionalized for them on weekends, and he was the one who enjoyed them the most. Kakashi loved to accompany them. He loved to see him happy. He loved to see Sakura happy.
He loved seeing them both happy together. That was enough for him.
Suddenly, Obito fiddled with the radio and turned the knob until he found the right station. The intro to “My Girl” by The Temptations quickly filled the car, the first chords seeping into the ears of the three inside. And he, out of tune as always, turned around, pointing theatrically at Sakura, who was already smiling before her father even spoke to her:
— This one’s for you, my girl!
Kakashi remembered clearly his daughter’s high-pitched laughter, her eyes green as shining emeralds, her little hand trying to keep up with the rhythm. Obito sang with ridiculous enthusiasm, acting, dancing with his shoulders stuck to the bench. And at the end, he turned and blew an affectionate kiss into the air to his daughter, who asked in a shrill and excited voice, unable to contain the joy that had taken hold of her: “Again!”
During the trip, “My Girl” played five times in a row, because neither of them knew how to say “no” to the little girl.
Since then, that song belonged to her, dedicated to Sakura by Obito.
Kakashi closed the book with a light gesture and rested his hands on the cover as if sealing the memory inside it. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead on the back of his hands, unable to resume reading in the face of that avalanche of emotions awakened by a single memory. But one of the most special and symbolic memories of his entire life. Although he was not entirely overcome with sadness, the alpha’s chest ached, tightened, with a drop of guilt that gradually increased like a puddle spreading across a sidewalk — his therapist had told him that in these moments he had to clear his head through breathing exercises, but he never did the damn exercises. He felt incapable of doing them. And the typical feeling, now somewhat familiar, took hold of him.
It shouldn’t have been Obito. It should have been him.
He kept this resentment deep inside him, with a bitter pang that made even breathing seem too complicated a procedure for his body, rather than something natural and instinctive. His shoulders hunched, tense, and he decided he would disobey his routine that morning. He wasn’t mentally well enough to read, even though he had been immersed in that particular book for a few days. He got up, leaving “The Pillow Book” in the center of his desk.
He walked to the kitchen with his right hand massaging the left side of his chest, as if he could relieve the tightness that crushed his heart with the pressure of his palm. He checked his wristwatch, noting that, despite having read so little, forty minutes had already passed. Sakura would be waking up soon, so he decided to get a head start and made some coffee, while also preparing his daughte’s favorite breakfast on that nostalgic morning: sweet yogurt pancakes with red berries, accompanied by a mug of hot milk with a teaspoon of honey.
It had been her favorite breakfast since she was a child.
Obito used to make it every weekend when Sakura, at the age of five, showed that she had a dangerously sweet tooth. Kakashi remembered always arguing with his partner when he went overboard with the sugar, which was clearly not good for a child. But Obito always said that he was boring and that on weekends it was allowed. Sakura, of course, would repeat the words “annoying dad” with her arms crossed and a look of conviction on her face. He always gave in and just watched with a cup of coffee while Obito struggled to make pancakes stamped with animal faces or random grimaces, which Sakura always loved.
Kakashi never does the animal faces or random grimaces. He can’t.
He stacked the pancakes with military precision so that they were all exactly the same size. He left jars of chopped strawberries and blueberries on the table, and when he was finishing heating the milk, Sakura appeared in the kitchen — already dressed in her school uniform: The white shirt of the uniform was hastily tucked into her navy blue pants, two buttons on the collar were open, and the red tie was tied to her blouse in a way that would make any inspector stop in his tracks. Pakkun lazily followed behind her, but immediately went to eat the food Kakashi had put in his bowl.
— Good morning... — She greeted her father in a low tone, still a little sleepy. Kakashi poured her a mug of milk and set it in front of her as she sat down. — Wow.
— Good morning. — Kakashi greeted her back, pretending not to notice the small details that were out of place on her uniform. He knew that her reaction to any comment from him would be to roll her eyes and growl, “Dad, leave me alone.” — I made your favorites today. — he announced instead of anything else, and then placed the plate of stacked pancakes in front of her. Sakura blinked slowly. It wasn’t the first time he had done this, of course, but every time she took a moment to reflect.
She was feeling the pain of Obito’s absence. Kakashi knew, even though they never managed to talk about it.
— Thank you. — She replied in a whisper, a small smile threatening to appear. She ate some of the pancakes and took cautious sips of milk, while Kakashi drank his coffee and ate some other chopped fruit. — You made them without any sugar. — It wasn’t a question.
— Yes. — He reaffirmed without looking at her, now eating toast.
— You are so annoying... — Sakura teased, which elicited a chuckle from Kakashi. As serious as he was, Kakashi always laughed when it came to his daughter. She always managed to amuse him.
The two quickly finished breakfast. Sakura went to finish getting ready while Kakashi put everything in the dishwasher. As soon as the kitchen was tidy again, the girl returned with her backpack slung over one shoulder and her clothes neatly arranged.
— Sakura, your backpack. — He decided to get her attention now. —If you walk with it like that, your sp—
— My spine will break. Okay, okay, I know. — She grumbled, adjusting the other strap on her other shoulder. — Shall we go? — The two said goodbye to Pakkun with a pat on the head, a ritual they had both had since adopting the pug.
Kakashi grabbed his car keys, as well as a mask, because he still had the flu (even so, he had gone for his morning run. And it had’'t been the best idea) and walked to the garage. His car was a black Toyota Crown, from early last year, with clean lines and a long, solid body. The kind of car that wouldn’t go unnoticed, common mainly among executives. Everything in Kakashi’s life reflected the meticulousness and perfectionism that were part of him, and his car was perhaps the pinnacle of it all. There wasn’t a single scratch or dent. In addition, he always parked with frightening precision wherever he went, and there was no space he couldn’t fit into while parking.
The two settled into the white leather seats, Kakashi starting the car, which was already beeping to indicate that they weren’t wearing their seatbelts. Sakura grumbled; she thought the vehicle was over the top and felt a certain embarrassment whenever another colleague discovered that it was her father’s car. She didn’t like to draw attention to herself, but everything about Kakashi seemed to be flashy to other people. Sometimes, when she was around him, she wanted to bury her head in the ground and never come out. But she had never confessed this to him, of course. She knew it kinda of was cruel.
— Is today the day Iruka-sensei is having dinner with us? — Sakura asked as soon as Kakashi started driving down the street. Her father nodded.
— Yes, today is Thursday. I invited him yesterday... — The girl sank into her seat, her face flushed with embarrassment.
— I told you not to do that. He just had a nice conversation with me once...
— Yes, but it did you a lot of good, don’t you think? I thought it would be a nice gesture.
— It’s nice, but you didn't have to. He must think I’m lonely. — Kakashi shook his head, without taking his attention off the traffic.
— He’s your teacher. He thinks you’re an amazing girl. — A pause. — Just like I do, Sakura.
She didn’t look at him, instead focusing on the window. Kakashi could see it out of the corner of his eye.
— It’ll be fine. Besides, I’m curious about what exactly he did that made you so happy... — Sakura rolled her eyes.
— He’s not forty years old and he knows what TikTok is! Starts there.
— I’ve never heard of it.
— See? That’s what I'm talking about. That’s the whole point. — She snorted and Kakashi shrugged. Soon he parked in front of the school, and Sakura hurriedly began to arrange her backpack on her back, one strap over her left shoulder. — Bye, Dad. See you later.”
— Bye, darling. — Kakashi paused. He felt a sudden urge to say “I love you” to her, but the words were stuck in his throat, as if they were a ball of paper forced there. Sakura stared at him at that moment, as if she were aware of something unsaid hanging between them.
Then, without saying anything, she got out of the car. Kakashi exhaled, feeling a little down after that last interaction. He waited until she entered the building, after passing the inspector, to turn his body forward. He could see, from a distance, Iruka coming with determined steps from the teachers’ garage, with an eco-bag on one shoulder and a test envelope in his arm. He looked tired, as if he had stayed up all night worrying about something, and today he was wearing a plain, dark burgundy crew neck T-shirt under an open blue and black plaid shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The shirt was made of thin flannel, definitely comfortable but still presentable. Around his wrist, he wore a digital watch with a black strap. His pants were dark, straight-cut jeans, with black All Star sneakers, worn at the edges, which was noticeable even from a distance. The eco-bag he carried over his shoulder had an amphibian print (Kakashi thought they were amphibians, he didn't know much about animals) and was slightly overfilled.
The alpha found himself smiling at the sight of the clearly agitated beta — at least, Kakashi thought he was one.
And he thought once again, something that was in the back of his mind like a silent memory, that Iruka fitted very well with the smell of coffee that his shirt had emitted yesterday during their meeting.
{...}
Later, Iruka was standing in front of the address Kakashi had sent him. It was a huge house, a mansion, in fact, in one of the most upscale neighborhoods in the city. He was already anxious before, but as soon as he entered the neighborhood, his heart began to beat with an impossible force inside his chest, as if it wanted to break through his ribs. He parked his humble car — a dark green Yaris Hatch, very dark indeed—and headed for the mansion’s door, which had a digital doorbell with a camera.
He could hear Kakashi’s voice, muffled by both the microphone and the flu.
“I’ll open the door, Iruka-sensei.”
Just the tone of his voice made the brunette shiver. Stop. Stop immediately. He had to start fighting with himself.
He wasn’t sure now if the outfit he had chosen was really the best option. After almost freaking out the night before, he opted for something casual that he could even wear to teach a class if he wanted to look more put together for school. It was a round-neck, long-sleeved shirt in a military green shade, comfortable dark jeans, a pair of classic white converse on his feet, and a silver watch on his left wrist. His hair was loose, freshly washed, and his expression tried to convey a calmness that was contrary to what he was really feeling. He had sprayed a little of his favorite perfume on his neck: lemongrass. He liked the fragrance because it gave him a feeling of freshness whenever he wore it, as if it would keep him clean longer.
He was biting his lower lip anxiously when the door opened, revealing the slender figure of Kakashi dressed exclusively in black. He was wearing a long-sleeved, high-necked shirt and tailored pants with a belt. Since he was at home, only socks covered his feet. Iruka noticed that there was a piece of furniture right next to Kakashi, inside the house, which extended into a garage with a huge car and an even bigger house just behind it. The man was still wearing a mask, and because of his black clothes, Iruka was unable to immediately notice that he was wearing an apron, also black.
— Iruka?
The silver-haired man’s drawling voice made him shake his head, snapping him out of his reverie. He smiled awkwardly.
— Y-yes?
— Shall we go inside? I told you to make yourself at home. — Kakashi politely made room for him, and Iruka took small steps inside. He could feel the older man’s presence behind him like a source of tension and heat, and he took off his shoes before properly entering their house, already aware that it would be rude to enter with his shoes on. It was a habit he didn’t have at home, despite growing up in Japan.
— Thank you. — Iruka said and waited for the man to go inside, following him to the other door.
— Sakura will be here soon. I’m making dinner, but I’ll be done soon too. You can wait for... — Before Kakashi could finish, Pakkun appeared, coming down the stairs at a frantic pace unusual for his age. He ran up to Iruka, which was even more unusual, wagging his curled tail. After sniffing the teacher’s socks for a few long moments, the two men watching him intently, he lay down on his back on the floor. — Oh. — Kakashi couldn’t contain his surprise.
Pakkun didn’t like anyone other than him or Sakura.
— Awn, you’re so cute... — Iruka smiled broadly, crouching down to give him the requested belly rub. Then he turned his face to Kakashi, his dark eyes shining. — What’s his name, Mr—I mean, Kakashi?
— Pakkun.
— Pakkun. — Iruka repeated, still smiling. — That’s cute! It suits him.
— Sakura named him. She was kind of addicted to repeating “pakupaku” around here, the house... — that’s a Japanese onomatopoeia for the word “chew”, because it imitates the sound of chewing — so we put it together. Pakkun.
Iruka nodded, still stroking the puppy’s warm belly. A noise from the stove in the kitchen caught Kakashi’s attention, and he excused himself to finish up. Although he was focused on finishing the dishes chosen for the evening, the fact that Pakkun had loved Iruka practically before even meeting him would not leave his mind anytime soon...
Notes:
the whole dinner scene will be available next chapter hehe kisses (hope it will come sooner than this one. i had a rough week, forgive me)
Chapter 5: Beginning
Summary:
Iruka and Kakashi feel the light weight of beginning.
Notes:
hope you enjoy <3 thank you for the kudos and comments!!!!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Iruka was still stroking Pakkun’s belly when Sakura appeared coming down the stairs. He heard footsteps coming from the stairs and raised his head, still crouching. His eyes met the familiar silhouette of the student, but she was not wearing the typical school uniform: Sakura was dressed completely casually, in a pink sweatshirt and leggings. Her damp hair revealed that she had taken a shower recently. Iruka smiled when he saw her, and she returned the gesture, exuding a calm and good-humored aura as she approached the teacher.
— Hi, Iruka-sensei! — She greeted him, and soon her eyes stopped on Pakkun, still lying on the floor and enjoying the affection. — Looks like he already likes you! That was fast...
— Hi, Sakura. — Iruka let out an awkward chuckle. — Yeah, your father already explained to me that he’s not very fond of people... But I’m glad to be an exception. — He prolonged his response, feeling a little more comfortable with the familiar presence of the student. Iruka finally stood up, which made Pakkun get on all fours and head for the kitchen, where Kakashi was finishing the last details of dinner.
The teacher’s brown eyes scanned the Hatake house. At the moment, he was in the dining room, but the absence of walls separating the rooms was a notable feature of the mansion’s ground floor: the dining room and living room were like one large room, despite the clear difference. The kitchen was separated by white walls — the color palette of the residence is marked by white and neutral shades of gray, beige, and touches of black. Everything seemed meticulously organized — not in a cold way, but in a functional way. The floor was light wood, and the furniture followed the neutral palette of grays, blacks, beiges, and wood tones. The walls were really clean, denoting an impeccable shade of white that Iruka’s eyes could barely process, but they weren’t empty: a few minimalist paintings, carefully bound books lined up on built-in shelves, ceramic vases with dried ikebana arrangements, and many, many, many picture frames.
Sakura noticed that the teacher was exploring the house with his eyes.
— Would you like me to show you around the house while my father finishes dinner?
— I’d love to, Sakura-chan. Thank you very much. — He smiled kindly as his student smiled, happy that she had made the right suggestion.
— Well, this is our ground floor. My father is in the kitchen, his favorite place. He doesn’t like to be disturbed while he’s cooking, so we’ll leave that for later. This is the dining room, where we have more formal meals, like today. — She explained in detail, a fact about Sakura that Iruka had already noticed as her teacher. — But we eat most of our meals in the kitchen, because there’s a very comfortable round table there. Down that hallway... — Sakura pointed to a hallway with the lights off. — That’s my father’s office. He loves to read and always has to deal with reports and things like that when he doesn’t have to go to the police station, so...
— Police station?
— Yes, sensei. He’s... a police officer. — Sakura shrugged, as if it were no big deal. — More specifically, he’s an inspector. He basically leads police officers and conducts investigations, things like that. I don’t know for sure. — She didn’t seem very interested in his job, while Iruka was the complete opposite.
That meant Kakashi had to wear police uniforms when he was on duty. Just the image, the idea of the image, in fact, of Kakashi wearing the uniform was enough to make Iruka practically lose himself in fantasies that his perverted mind conjured up right there, in front of Sakura, his student and daughter of the alpha.
He was pathetic.
Iruka shook his head in a forced attempt to return to reality and faced Sakura with an awkward smile.
— Er, sorry. Can we continue? — He cleared his throat and Sakura shrugged, ignoring what had happened.
— Sure... As you may have noticed, my father likes everything to be very well organized. It's his way.” But at the same time, we love picture frames! He also made sure to frame all the drawings I’ve done since kindergarten... — Sakura blushed as she approached a piece of furniture in the room where some of the pictures she was referring to Iruka were located. The teacher followed her, curious. — But that’s his thing, sensei. I was against it.
— That’s very sweet of him, Sakura-chan. — Iruka commented to the student, still smiling as she stared at the portrait closest to her. In fact, it was one of the framed drawings: it was just an indecipherable scribble in pink, with a heart and three names: “Saku-chan, Daddy Kaka, and Daddy Obibi.” That particular drawing made Iruka realize an inevitable detail: there was a third person in their family. A man with short hair, bright eyes, fair skin, and a charming smile that appeared in several photos there on that counter and on the walls of the house. There was a photo of that man next to Kakashi watching a baby version of Sakura asleep; another in which Sakura was making a face on her first day of school, with a missing teeth and a uniform too new to fit properly; another of the man unknown to Iruka holding Sakura asleep in his lap, his eyes clearly tired but still sweet, even through the photograph. There was one last picture frame, in which Kakashi appeared next to a giant orange dog with smiling eyes, both bathed in the light of an orange sunset that highlighted the man’s face. Iruka had not yet seen his face in person, but from the photo he looked serious, with a smile that did not show his teeth. His eyes revealed more joy than his mouth.
And he was beautiful. Absurdly beautiful.
Next to that last photo was a crumpled piece of paper with a collage of leaves and glitter stuck on crookedly, probably from Sakura’s preschool days. The sight of another one of her old drawings there made Iruka smile, distracting him for a moment from the deadly beauty that the alpha must exude. Even though he had seen a photo of him, it didn’t prepare him for when he heard Kakashi’s voice calling them to dinner and had to turn around, coming face to face with the man finally without his mask.
Sakura was mentally grateful that dinner was ready. She had noticed that Iruka had noticed the presence of her other father in the photos, but that was a topic she avoided at all costs talking about with people other than her therapist or Kakashi. And she still rarely spoke to her father about the loss, because Kakashi had never been a man to open up about his feelings. Just like her grandfather, Sakumo. The two were terribly similar in that personality trait.
— It’s on the table. — Kakashi pointed to the low table in the dining room, a chadubai, with three cushions around it, and a series of beautiful, neatly arranged platters of various foods served around the smooth, circular surface of the table. Iruka didn’t know what to process first: the absurd amount of fragrant homemade food or Kakashi’s perfectly sculpted face, entirely on display for him to admire.
The teacher blinked, as if his brain needed extra time to register what he was seeing. Hatake Kakashi’s face, finally on display in person, was...
Impressive.
Not in an obvious or vulgar way. There was a quiet, mature, almost arrogant beauty in that face. His features were marked as if carved in stone — a defined jawline, thin lips naturally curved in a serious, firm line, accompanied by a discreet mole near his chin, just below the corner of his mouth, which added unnecessary charm — because Kakashi alone already exuded natural charm.
But it was his eyes that caught his attention: asymmetrical, intense, slightly slanted at the corners.He had seen those eyes before, of course, because the mask only covered his nose and below, but having a full view of his face added details to the older alpha’s gaze that complemented the beauty of his dark eyes. The left eye — with a dark iris and long eyelashes — contrasted with the right, cut by a vertical scar, discreet but impossible to ignore. It did not disfigure his face, but completed it.
His silver hair was still slightly damp from the stuffy kitchen and fell untidily over his forehead, with a few strands stuck to his fair skin.
Kakashi looked at Iruka naturally, perhaps even distractedly, but the teacher found it difficult to breathe the moment he noticed the eye contact, as if the air were escaping from his lungs.
And it was entirely Kakashi’s fault.
He seemed... Wild and serene at the same time. The kind of man who carried danger on his shoulders and melancholy in his eyes. And Iruka, ridiculously human next to him, could only think of one thing:
“He’s too handsome to be real.”
— Shall we go? — The alpha’s soft voice filled his ears, pulling Iruka out of his reverie. He noticed that the silver-haired man had taken off his apron, revealing the shirt underneath, the same color as the apron: black. But it highlighted his obvious muscles, and Iruka had to struggle to maintain eye contact with him. Because his gaze wanted so badly to descend to the robust chest of the policeman in front of him, but besides being a friendly dinner, Sakura was there. It would be very indecent.
Extremely indecent.
Sakura and Kakashi waited for Iruka to sit down before taking their seats. The teacher would have preferred to wait for them to sit down, as he was afraid of taking either of their favorite seats. But he quickly calmed down, remembering that Sakura had just explained to him that the two of them rarely ate at the low table. They were in the habit of eating together in the kitchen. Pakkun sneaked up on Iruka, sitting a few inches away from him, like an obedient little dog.
— We’re watching you, Pakkun. — Sakura warned, but the puppy ignored her, his eyes focused entirely on Iruka, who smiled. The two finally sat down, and the teacher was able to take a decent, thorough look at all the dishes in front of him, all lovingly prepared by Kakashi.
He could see dishes such as: Hiyayakko with a special topping (basically chilled tofu served with light soy sauce, grated fresh ginger, chopped green onions, and a touch of yuzu kosho: chili paste with yuzu peel). That was Sakura’s favorite appetizer; she likes it because it is refreshing and mild. Kakashi always buys the best quality tofu when he intends to prepare Hiyayakko for his daughter, and that night was no different.
There was another option: traditional miso soup with a homemade touch (miso soup with dashi made from scratch, soft tofu cubes, wakame seaweed, and shimeji mushrooms sautéed separately before being added to the broth).
— Try the miso soup, sensei. — He pointed to the dish with his chopsticks, drawing Iruka’s attention. — I wouldn’t force you to eat everything on the table, but this is a classic must-try for me, so please. It reveals the heart of the cook.
Ah, Iruka really wanted to know Kakashi’s heart. It was the perfect opportunity. The undeniable request.
— Sure. Thank you very much, Kakashi-san. — The affirmative made the alpha smile, more with his eyes than with his mouth, as usual.
For the main course, Kakashi had prepared Yakizakana in the oven (grilled fish). He had chosen sabá (horse mackerel) fillets, marinated them in soy sauce, sake, mirin, and ginger, then baked them in the oven until they were golden on the outside and juicy on the inside. Iruka had arrived when the baking time was up. Another detail about how Sakura’s tastes influence Kakashi’s cooking: she doesn’t like bones, so he always prepares fillets that have already been cleaned. Accompanying the fish was white gohan cooked in a rice cooker with kombu seaweed (loose Japanese white rice with a piece of kombu to give it a mild aroma and flavor); Nasu no miso (eggplant sautéed in miso, basically slices of eggplant browned in sesame oil and glazed with sweet miso paste). It is a dish that Sakura “finds beautiful” and likes when the miso flavor is mild, as Kakashi always makes sure to leave it. As a side dish, he had prepared some cucumber sunomono, thin slices topped with shredded crab, toasted sesame seeds, and a sweet and sour sauce made from rice vinegar and sugar. It was the first thing Sakura put in her mouth after they started dinner, she always nibbled on it before the main course, even before the appetizer.
— I love baked fish. — Iruka comments after Sakura explains in detail all the processes her father insisted on carrying out for dinners, and not just for special occasions like this. Kakashi truly considered cooking a passion, and he put his whole heart into everything he prepared. That brief moment, filled with Sakura’s elaborate compliments to her father, made Kakashi blush softly. He was a tough guy, yes, but not when it came to his daughter. Iruka couldn’t stop praising the food after tasting absolutely everything with restrained fervor.
— I just put a little more effort into it today... — Kakashi feigned modesty and glanced at Pakkun out of the corner of his eye. — That little guy there was a big help, as well as a faithful companion. — He joked, which elicited giggles from both Iruka and Sakura. The atmosphere was light and relaxed, and Kakashi could smell a faint hint of coffee in the air, as if someone were brewing coffee at a considerable distance from them. Funny, he was starting to associate the aroma of coffee with Iruka. It seemed... It seemed right to think that way about the teacher, but the alpha quickly pushed those thoughts out of his head.
— I’m no culinary sommelier, especially since I only eat instant food and fast food, but this is perfect. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten anything so good in my life, Kakashi-san. — The alpha’s silver eyebrows arched at the sincere compliment, and he stopped eating to watch Iruka eat intently. He ate slowly, with apparent delicacy. A delicacy that Kakashi would usually associate with omegas, even though Sakura and others, such as Hiruzen and Asuma, had already told him that Iruka was, in fact, a beta.
— Just instant food, sensei? — Sakura interjected, frowning.
— Yeah. I’m completely hopeless in the kitchen, and it’s been a long time since my parents returned to their home country... — He shrugged, his smile fading with a hint of sadness.
— Oh, do you live alone? Where is their home country?
— No. I have a cat... They currently live in Brazil, it was their dream to comeback... But it’s pretty lonely sometimes. And I especially miss home cooking. — Iruka smiled more openly now, looking at Sakura. — That’s why I think you should be less angry with your father. He’s a great dad, young lady.
Sakura blushed bright red. This elicited a loud, booming, sincere laugh from Kakashi, but he remained seated in the same position, only his shoulders shaking to betray his laughter. Iruka felt his whole body tremble with the sound running through his system.
Handsome.
— Iruka-sensei! — Sakura scolded as her face returned to its normal color. — I’m sorry you feel lonely... But, well, you can come to dinner with us anytime, right, Dad?
— Of course. — Kakashi didn’t hesitate to answer. — You didn’t even yell at me this week because of his invaluable advice. In fact, it would be great to have you here every week, Iruka-sensei.
— Dad! — Sakura frowned. — Then he’ll think it’s a punishment for him...
— Punishment? A dinner like this every week? — Iruka’s eyes widened. —Look, I don't want to sound lazy, but I’d love it. — This elicited laughter from the other two present.
They finished their meals with a fun atmosphere hanging between the three of them, and Sakura and Kakashi set about clearing the table to serve dessert. They didn’t let Iruka lift a finger, and although somewhat uneasy, the teacher accepted, while petting Pakkun, who had sneaked up on him and lay down next to him on the floor.
They were served strawberry Daifuku, basically rice cakes filled with anko, a sweet bean paste, and a fresh strawberry in the center. Kakashi had gone to the market earlier to buy the strawberries for this dessert.
Sakura loves strawberries and always tries to steal as many cakes as she can. Her father, aware of her behavior, already prepares a few extra just for her. He also served genmaicha green tea in delicate porcelain cups; a blend of green tea and roasted rice, with a light and comforting aroma. The alpha prefers this to end his meals precisely because it is not so bitter. And something told him that Iruka-sensei would like it.
— Thank you very much. — The brunette said as he sipped a little tea and savored the dumpling. He still couldn’t quite believe that a man like Kakashi could prepare all this with such mastery and delicacy. It was not common behavior, especially coming from an alpha with such prestige as him, being a high-ranking police officer.
And it had been a while since he had had so much fun in one night.
Sakura quickly devoured her cookies and drank all her tea. When she was done, she stretched and stood up, unable to suppress a yawn. Iruka hadn't noticed, but it was almost ten o’clock at night and she had class tomorrow.
So did he, but he was the teacher.
— I’m going to bed now. — She announced, and they both nodded. —Thank you for coming, Iruka-sensei. Today was really nice.
— Whenever you need me, Sakura, I’ll be around. — He smiled kindly back at her. — You can count on me, okay? — She nodded, smiling too, before going up to her room, leaving Kakashi and Iruka alone. Actually, Pakkun was sleeping against Iruka’s thigh, so they weren’t entirely alone.
But they were practically just each other’s company.
The sound of Sakura’s footsteps disappeared halfway down the stairs. The house, previously filled with the teenager's cheerful voice, was plunged into thick silence. It wasn’t uncomfortable, but Iruka felt he should do something. Say anything.
— Let me clear the table this time... — He said, and Kakashi immediately began to protest.
— Really, Iruka-sensei...
— I insist.
— But you're a guest...
— Together, then?
Kakashi couldn’t say no.
They cleared the utensils from the low table and stood up, Iruka following the alpha to the kitchen where they put the plates and porcelain in the dishwasher, in which Kakashi had already organized all the rest of the dirty dishes and just set it to start. Iruka leaned against the counter while Kakashi crossed his arms over his chest, making eye contact with the teacher now that they were side by side, both against the cold marble.
The aroma of coffee still lingered. And Iruka felt an invasive but small, completely ignorable warmth take hold of him.
— She still feels anger. — Kakashi says suddenly, his deep voice breaking the silence like a stone thrown into a calm lake. He was talking about Sakura. — But she listened to you. And I think... she listened to me a little after that too. In a way she hasn’t done in a while. — He didn’t know the content of the conversation between the two, nor did he want to. He just wanted to make it clear to the brunette how grateful he was, once again.
— I think she just needed to know that she was being heard too. — Iruka smiled kindly, shrugging gently, not in a rude gesture.
Kakashi tilted his head slightly when he heard the answer, as if he were considering those words more carefully than he let on.
— She trusts you. — He said, in an almost thoughtful tone, without hiding the hint of admiration that escaped between the words.
Iruka looked away, still with a discreet smile on his lips, and crossed his arms, as if trying to contain something — or protect himself from something he himself couldn’t name. However, it seemed that he was mirroring Kakashi’s gestures. The alpha uncrossed his arms, resting his hands on the edge of the counter, his face still turned toward the brunette beside him.
— She’s smart. She just needs some space... and time. — The teacher murmured. — But you’ve also been patient. I know it’s not easy... I deal with all kinds of teenagers every day. — And he didn’t even have any idea of everything Sakura was thinking, of everything she was being through and what had already happened to her.
— No. — Kakashi replied, and for a moment his gaze drifted beyond Iruka, as if reviewing scenes he would rather leave in the past. — It’s not.
Silence fell between them again, but now it was warm. Alive. Even comfortable. The distant sound of the dishwasher filled the room, rhythmic, as if marking the beat of something invisible.
Iruka straightened up a little, preparing to leave. But as he rested his hand on the counter, his fingers brushed Kakashi’s, which were there, too close. Both froze for a fraction of a second. It was a minimal touch, but enough to make Iruka shiver. The heat inside him seemed to grow bigger for a second; that second.
And neither of them backed away.
— I’m sorry. — The teacher muttered, still frozen.
— It’s okay. — Kakashi replied, almost in a whisper. — It wasn’t bad. — He ended up thinking too loudly and slowly moved his fingers away, almost as if he didn’t want to. The aroma of coffee seemed to increase between them, enveloping Kakashi in an illusion.
Iruka broke eye contact with a low sigh and a restrained smile. He ran his fingers distractedly through his hair, as if he didn’t know what to do with his hands. He didn’t know if he could look Kakashi in the eye anymore.
— It’s been a long time since I’ve spent so much time in a house that feels so... Alive.
— It’s hard to imagine this house being quiet after today. — The alpha said, so softly that Iruka almost thought he had misheard.
The teacher looked at him again. There was something in those brown eyes—a hesitation, perhaps, or a barely contained hunger. Not just physical. It was the desire to stay. To be welcomed. But he said nothing.
— You can come anytime, Iruka-sensei. — He smiled, breaking the silence between them. — You’ll always be welcome here.
Notes:
tell me what u guys think!!!!! I love to chat with you...
things will really begin next chapter, hehe
btw i love a slow burn #sorrynotsorry.
Chapter 6: Safe haven
Summary:
Iruka meets Kakashi again.
Notes:
enjoy your reading <3
I made a playlist for the fic! feel free to listen: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0DAcoTRSZ8HUQWDwCHqSu7?si=3a66742ee96c4b1b
The song in the beginning of this chapter is "The Only Exception" - Paramore.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
You are the only exception
And I'm on my way to believing
— And your hands brushed against each other in the kitchen?
— Yes, Genma. On his kitchen counter. Accidentally. But something sparked in me at that moment.
— Oh, yes.
— And he said “It wasn't bad.” I pretended I didn't hear him, because he's the father of one of my students. Do you think I should have said something?
— Well, Iruka... Maybe? I'm not very good with these things. Does the fact that he's the father of one of his students prevent him from finding you attractive?
— It's not just that! He's... He's an alpha, a real man, a cop, he had a partner they don't talk about much, but there are a lot of pictures of him around the house and I... I'm just a teacher, a doctoral student in debt and a joke. A joke! On top of that, I'm a beta, you know... I have absolutely nothing interesting that could instigate someone like Kakashi. — Iruka whined, staring at his friend sitting across from him. He and Genma were having lunch at a restaurant located on the campus of Tokyo National University, where they were both doctoral students in biology, with different advisors.
Iruka, in addition to teaching in the mornings, worked on his research project in the afternoons at the university. His advisor is Professor Yamata Orochimaru, a biologist specializing in animal toxin biochemistry and molecular ecology. Obsessive about rigorous and detailed data, he is considered eccentric but respected nationally and internationally for his contributions to chemical biology. He also works with the systematics and ecology of endangered species—and is feared in all science departments because of his obsession with every kind of detail. In addition, rumors circulate in the corridors that he is a perfectionist to the extreme, which is why everyone fears his guidance. But Iruka didn't have much to run away from, considering that the title of his doctoral dissertation is: “Chemical ecology and sensory perception in urban anurans: interspecific communication and behavioral response to volatile compounds in anthropized environments in Japan.”
In summary: Iruka studies how frogs and toads, especially those inhabiting urban and semi-urban areas, use chemical communication (smells, pheromones, skin-emitted compounds etc.) to survive and interact. He investigates how these chemical signals are affected by pollution, noise, artificial light, and human presence—and how this impacts amphibian behavior (such as mating, defense, and feeding). Orochimaru is the perfect person to guide him in this line of research, among all the professors at the University. Iruka likes his advisor, even though he sometimes fears him. And Orochimaru has a special appreciation for Iruka, as he manages to win over everyone around him with his kindness and beautiful smile.
We can consider Iruka as another one of the “things” that Orochimaru has a strange admiration for.
Genma belongs to the same graduate program as Iruka, but his advisor is Professor Senju Jiraiya, a brilliant, eccentric researcher with an unorthodox approach, known for his bold publications, provocative theories, and the great freedom he gives his students. He writes well, presents poorly, but impresses nonetheless. He and Genma form a decidedly relaxed duo that fits together, not in a discordant way like Iruka and Orochimaru. Genma's current doctoral research is “Urban ethology and chemical communication of nocturnal mammals” with a title still in development, but not far from Iruka's own research.
At the beginning of his doctorate two years ago, Iruka was attending the mandatory core classes — subjects such as “Methods in Ecological Research”, “Ethics in Biological Sciences”, lApplied Statistics.l It was all very technical, and he felt a little out of place because he was more focused on extension and laboratory work than on teaching itself, as he had been a high school teacher since before starting his master's degree. In one of these “Ecological Statistics” classes, he ended up sitting next to Genma — who was already well into his doctorate because he was a few years older, but was retaking the course to update his curriculum under pressure from Jiraiya. Things advisors love to do: torture. On that particular day, Genma was dying of sleep because he had spent the previous night poring over a survey, also under Jiraiya's orders, and even under the influence of three cups of coffee and a blackberry energy drink, he was falling asleep.
And the subject was boring.
So he glanced at Iruka out of the corner of his eye. He always noticed him, after all, Iruka was known for his education and for getting along with everyone. He nudged the brunette and, given the attention he received, muttered:
— If I pass out on the table, nudge me discreetly. Preferably with something other than a spreadsheet. — The survey had left him traumatized.
Iruka laughed. They spent the class exchanging sarcastic comments in notes or scribbles in the dark-haired boy's notebook, mainly about the teacher who pronounced “heteroscedasticity” as if it were an evil spell. And since then, their bond has turned into an alliance amid the competition that characterizes the academic environment, regardless of the institution or country.
They had a ritual of having lunch together every Friday, as it was the day when Iruka had fewer classes in the morning and could go to the university earlier. As much as he needed to be there every afternoon in theory, on some days he stayed at school to grade tests, and Orochimaru understood as long as Iruka stayed in the lab until midnight on some other day. Yes, that's right. In fact, Iruka had already fallen asleep in the lab only to be found by his co-advisor, Kabuto, with a look of utter disgust at the unattractive sight of the brunette sleeping with a string of saliva running down his cheek.
At that moment, Iruka was updating Genma on the details of the student's hot father from the night before. And Genma was having a blast. The restaurant was simple, tucked between two old buildings near the campus, but it served honest teishoku and free green tea—which, for two indebted doctoral students, was already a luxury. Iruka stirred the rice with his chopsticks, as if he didn't want to eat. But he did want to, he was just waiting for Genma to say something in response.
— I think you're much more interesting than you think, 'Ruka. You're playing the poor little victim... — He crossed his arms. — Besides, if you felt it, he felt it too. Trust me, I'm an alpha...
— But I'm not an omega...— Genma didn't know. And Iruka maintained the narrative of being a beta well, after all, he didn't emit pheromones.
— And did you need to be? Look, Iruka, you're overreacting.
—And I can't be sure what he's feeling! If there's anything to be felt, to generate feelings...— Heavens, I met him on Wednesday! I didn't even know he existed before that, and now he's rented a triplex in my head...
—Iruka... he said it wasn't bad. That's the most of a statement a traumatized cop can give. Either because he wants to eat you or because he liked you.
— Genma!— Iruka blushed to the top of his head.
— Oh, come on.— He raised his hands in surrender. — Thinking like an alpha here. And older than you too. I'm almost forty, and so is Kakashi, right?’
— He's forty. I saw it on Sakura's file.
— Stalker.
— No, I'm prepared. It's different.
— Sure. — Genma laughed.
Iruka snorted in frustration and stabbed a piece of cucumber harder than necessary, eating it with unnecessary hatred as well.
— Let's change the subject,— he muttered, his face hot. — I'm exposing myself too much. It's humiliating enough to admit that I almost freaked out because of a touch of the hand. And you didn't even help me. You just laughed!
— I'm listening to you, come on. But you're making this out to be some kind of drama... — Genma raised his hands once again in a gesture of surrender. — Let's talk about something else, then. What's Dr. Orochimaru up to? Still cataloging toxins at three in the morning and sending you PDF files at four?
Iruka let out a short, dry laugh.
— Four twelve. With the email title in Latin and no message body, just an attachment weighing 140 megabytes. When I opened it, it was a twenty-page review of the article I hadn't even finished writing. — He couldn't hold back the whine.
— Oh, yeah. Man, your advisor is a psychopath.
— You're the one who's spoiled by Jiraiya. He writes the paragraphs for you!
— He writes with mistakes. And then he says I'm the one who needs to learn how to revise.— Genma rolled his eyes. — But honestly, between receiving emails in Latin and manuscripts with inside jokes about fox pheromones, I'll take the foxes.
Iruka laughed more freely this time, his humor slowly returning. Genma took the opportunity to add:
— By the way, does Kabuto still stare at you as if you were a laboratory contamination?
— No. Now he's in the 'defiant and passive-aggressive’ phase.— Iruka sighed. — Last week, he asked me if I was — happy with the ethical quality of the sampling,— as if he were asking if I had washed the dishes at my worst enemy's house. I didn't know whether to thank him for the — feedback— or cry.
— And what did you do?
— I pretended I didn't understand. I smiled and offered him coffee. He hates coffee with sugar. I made it with two spoons.
Genma laughed loudly, slapping the table with his palm.
— That's passive-aggressive with a PhD, Iruka. Orochimaru would be proud.
— Orochimaru was only proud because I kept the pH data from the sampling with a standard error below 0.3. He ignored the rest. — Iruka shrugged and took a sip of green tea, now cold because it had been forgotten during the conversation.
— You're building up emotional resilience, and that's what a PhD is all about. Congratulations, my freshman...
— Or it's an ulcer. It's definitely an ulcer, given the amount of coffee, energy drinks, and medication I've been consuming since I started my master's degree four years ago... And I still have two more years to go... — Not ironically, if Iruka started crying, Genma wouldn't judge him. He would most likely join in.
— That's if you hand it in on time and don't ask for an extension, like most normal, mortal human beings do...
— Shut up. I think I'd rather die or be arrested.
— Arrested? By Kakashi?
— You said we were going to change the subject.
— Okay, I'll stop. For real this time.
— Thanks. — Iruka sat up straight in his chair. As much as his mind was in turmoil, talking to Genma, especially on Fridays at lunch, which they religiously shared, always eased the feelings in his heart a little. He knew he wasn't alone, even though he often felt that way.
— What are you doing today? — The alpha asked curiously, changing the subject from both Kakashi and research.
— I have dinner at the house of some friends, Kurenai, who works with me, and Asuma, her husband.
— Oh, right. You've told me about them. They have a little girl?
— Yes, Mirai. — Iruka smiled at the image of the little girl that popped into his head at that moment. She loved Iruka with all her heart and affectionately called him — Uncle ’Ruka.— He also adored her devotedly, considering himself a godfather in theory. — What are you going to do?
— I'm going to drink with the other freshmen since you're abandoning me on this cold Friday...—
— Dramatic.
— What comforts me is knowing that at least you're not going to see Kakashi. Because that would be betrayal, my love.
— Ha. I would never have anything with you. — Genma made an offended expression on his face.
— That hurts, Iruka-sensei.
— Seriously, Genma. You're too much of a jerk for me...
— Oh, says the saint. Wasn't it you who almost took an omega home this week and had dinner at an alpha's house? In a span of what, two days?
— I'm going to kill you for reminding me of that. It was a complete disaster.
— Because you have emotional blocks that you don't admit to and push away everyone who finds you attractive.
— Ouch. That hurt. Unexpectedly. — Iruka blinked slowly. Genma wasn't wrong and shrugged as if he knew he was right, taking a sip of tea that was also cold at that moment.
— The most necessary truths always come like that. — He placed his wallet on the table. — I have to go meet with Jiraiya-sensei, otherwise he'll send me more emails with cryptic jokes. I'd rather face him in person.
Iruka nodded, already getting up.
— Wish me luck dealing with Kabuto and Orochimaru.
— Oh, I'm always praying for you, actually.
As they paid the bill, Iruka could only think about the details he hadn't shared with Genma: what had happened after he left Kakashi's house the night before.
— You can come anytime, Iruka-sensei. — He smiled. — You're always welcome here.
Iruka remained speechless. He continued to stare at Kakashi with those dark eyes like a complete and utter idiot, as if he didn't even know how to speak. In fact, the brunette really felt like all the words in his vocabulary had disappeared entirely, as if he had never learned a single word in his life. But he had to force himself to say something, anything, while he had Kakashi's devoted attention on him, as if he were the most interesting person in the whole world.
— Thank you very much, Kakashi-san. — His heart leapt at the thanks, and the way he heard him say it informally seemed to please Kakashi. He kept smiling, his eyes more cheerful than his smile. Even though his expression seemed absurdly light. Iruka took a deep breath, struggling to breathe, and glanced at the watch on his wrist. It was already past 10 p.m. — I... I think I need to go, unfortunately. I also have class tomorrow, but I'm the teacher.— He smiled awkwardly, but Kakashi had genuinely enjoyed the comment.
— That's right. I'll walk you to the door.
Iruka nodded and let the man go ahead, following him to the entrance. Pakkun walked behind them with lazy steps, but unwilling to leave Iruka's side for now. He petted the puppy's head while Kakashi opened the door. The omega felt a warmth growing in the pit of his stomach that he was determined to ignore—he had eaten a lot that night, and he didn't think he was feeling sick. His body was more accustomed to homemade food than real food, so that must be it. Kakashi, on the other hand, could feel that familiar aroma of coffee filling his nostrils again, just as it had at school on Wednesday.
As if someone were pouring coffee next to him. And that person was Iruka, because the aroma definitely came from him.
Maybe he always smelled like coffee. Even though Kakashi had sensed a distinct scent of lemongrass when he arrived, it now seemed to be overshadowed by the presence of coffee.
But the man was also determined to ignore it. Two reasons: Iruka was a beta, he knew that. And Kakashi hadn't smelled any pheromones since Obito's loss. There was a medical reason for that — and he didn't think he would suddenly, ten years later, be circumventing a medical report proven by cutting-edge science.
Pakkun stood at the entrance of the house while the two walked through the garden to the final exit.
— Thank you for coming. — Kakashi said, making a move to open the automatic gate.
— Thank you, Kakashi-san. — Iruka smiled kindly back. — Have a good night.
— You too. — The gate opened and Iruka waved, having already put on his shoes as he walked out the other door. He looked at Kakashi over his shoulder, the man leaning against the open gate as he watched the teacher get into his car, a Yaris that perfectly matched Iruka and his personality. Kakashi couldn't help but find him adorable. He waved back briefly before getting into the vehicle. He waited for Iruka to start the car and disappear down the street before getting back in.
Iruka drove two blocks, until he was sure he was out of Kakashi's sight, and parked the car again. That warmth in his stomach had increased to an almost palpable density. His nostrils were flooded with the smell of coffee with notes of what seemed to be a kind of nutmeg with vanilla, not that Iruka was thoroughly evaluating the aroma, but his head was working in a completely bizarre way. Or rather, it wasn't working as it should. He had never emitted pheromones, so what could it be...?
Because the smell was definitely coming from him. And the heat kept rising, completely overwhelming him at that moment and seeming to permeate the entire car. He thought about opening the windows, but if he was really emitting pheromones or whatever it was, he would be in trouble if there was an alpha nearby. So he kept the windows closed, suffocating in his own heat. He felt something throbbing between his legs, and when he looked down, a loud gasp escaped his mouth.
He was hard. Absurdly hard.
As if he were in heat.
And he had never been in heat before.
He had to relieve himself, he had to find a way. He couldn't go home like that, he had to take the elevator and unlock the door. What if he ran into a neighbor on the way? He was truly lost.
So Iruka had to relieve himself right there in the car. The effect was temporary, because when he got home, the heat had returned. Even intoxicated by the unfamiliar smell of what appeared to be his own pheromones, they were accompanied by a hint of light smoke, as if someone had extinguished incense nearby, accompanied by a scent of dry amber. And the face that aroma reminded him of...
It was Kakashi's face.
Iruka hadn't been able to sleep the night before, but he had improved enough to take a generic suppressant he bought before arriving at school. He was determined to ignore that event indefinitely. He couldn't understand his own body, nor did he want to call his parents, who were on the other side of the world, to bother them with something as vague as this.
After all, he had always been just a defective omega.
He was going to pretend to be a beta forever.
{...}
Iruka rang the doorbell at Kurenai and Asuma's house with one hand while balancing the candy on the covered tray in the other. He was late because Orochimaru made him repeat the same procedure with the new samples five times until the results were flawless, according to the voices in his head. He drove like a madman to his house and prepared the dessert he had promised to bring: a plant-based milk flan with natural vanilla and decorated with red fruits, such as fresh raspberries and blueberries. Mirai liked that dessert, even though it was sugar-free. Then he had to get ready in five minutes and drove no faster than 30 km per hour because he was afraid of spilling the dessert he had worked so hard on (the preparation was simple and took less than half an hour to complete).
Since he had gotten ready so quickly, he couldn't think too much about what to wear. He grabbed a cotton T-shirt (the first one he saw in the closet), straight cut in terracotta color, with a very comfortable collar because it wasn't tight around the neck. There was a small, discreet embroidery on the chest, a delicate little frog. He put on straight-leg light-wash jeans and white Vans on his feet. His hair was loose, still slightly damp, and he had put on his wrist a colorful bracelet that Mirai had given him some time ago, which she had made for him herself.
— The last one to arrive!— Kurenai greeted him at the door with a broad smile on her red-lipped mouth. She was dressed up, wearing a red sleeveless dress with a high neckline that fit her silhouette well. Her hair was loose, framing her face. — You didn't have to bring anything, Iruka...
— I made the flan that Mirai loves. — He said as if justifying himself, while Kurenai promptly took the tray from his hands. Fortunately, she knew her daughter well, because as soon as Iruka set foot in the house, a shrill scream caught everyone's attention.
— Uncle 'Ruka!— The little girl came running up to the man, hugging his legs before he could react. Kurenai went to the kitchen to put Iruka's flan in the refrigerator.
— Hi, sweetheart... — He replied to Mirai as he knelt down to her height, hugging her back tightly. She was a miniature version of Kurenai. Asuma hadn't contributed much genetically to his daughter's appearance, honestly. — I missed you.
— Me too! — Her eyes automatically caught the bracelet on his wrist when he reached out to stroke her hair. The smile was inevitable. — You're wearing the bracelet I gave you...
— Of course. I had to look my best. I made the candy you like too.
— That's why you're my favorite uncle. — Iruka laughed and kissed her cheek before getting up. Mirai was still clinging to the omega's leg.
— Mirai, sweetie, let Uncle Iruka greet people...— Asuma appeared, sighing, smiling politely at the brunette. — Hey, how have things been, Iruka?
— Hi, Asuma-san. Everything's fine...— Iruka greeted him back and scanned the room, finding familiar and unfamiliar faces among the guests. Kurenai was talking to Gai, the new physical education teacher who had been transferred. He was an eccentric man with an equally eccentric appearance. Asuma passed by Iruka to talk to a tall man with brown hair and brown eyes.
— Let me introduce you to everyone.— Asuma turned to Iruka. — This is Tenzo, a friend from the police academy. Tenzo, this is Iruka, he works with Kurenai at the school.
— Nice to meet you. — Iruka greeted him politely, smiling back at the alpha.
— You already know Gai... That's Anko, she's a childhood friend. With her are Minato and Kushina... You teach their son, Naruto, right?
— Ah. Yes, I know them from parent-teacher conferences... — Iruka smiled briefly. Uzumaki Kushina was one of the most present mothers at class council meetings and was the definition of a doting mother, a helicopter parent, whatever you want to call it. Iruka liked Naruto a lot because he identified with him. And he admired his family.
— Great. — Asuma narrowed his eyes. — Where's Kakashi? — He asked Tenzo, who shrugged.
Before Iruka could think, a deep, familiar voice settled behind him.
— Did you call me?
And when he turned around, Kakashi was there, in the flesh.
And beautiful. Always beautiful.
Iruka had to look at every detail. His silver hair was neatly tousled, and today he was wearing a dark gray linen shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The collar button was dangerously open, revealing a little of his collarbone. Black chino pants completed the look, and a leather belt adorned them. Iruka inevitably also noticed that there were reading glasses hanging from his collar and a woody scent came from his body to deliciously fill Iruka's nostrils.
Damn.
— Iruka-sensei, how nice to see you here. — Kakashi stared up at him, his hands tucked into his pockets.
— Kakashi-san...
— Ah, but of course you know each other! Iruka is Sakura's teacher, isn't he?
— Yes.— Kakashi replied to Asuma casually. — We had dinner together yesterday too.
Iruka blushed as the other alpha raised an eyebrow.
— I invited him to have dinner with me and Sakura. — Kakashi corrected as Asuma stared from one to the other. Iruka nodded.
— Yeah. That's right. — Then Mirai pulled on his pants to get his attention, and he turned to her, mentally thanking the girl for saving him from that.
— Let's play, uncle? — She pouted irresistibly.
— Yes, dear, of course. — He then stared at Kakashi and Asuma a little awkwardly. — Excuse me...
— Mirai, you can't rent Iruka for the whole night... — Asuma tried to get his daughter's attention again as she took Iruka by the hand, ready to pull him away.
— Yes, I can! — She stuck her tongue out at him stubbornly and then marched into the room, where she had scattered several toys on the carpet while waiting for Iruka to arrive. The two sat there, Iruka barely able to hear his own thoughts as his heart pounded in his chest as if it were about to burst through his muscles.
Kakashi was there.
Kurenai had said he was Asuma's longtime colleague.
How did he not make the connections?
Stupid.
Kakashi stayed close to Tenzo and Asuma, his eyes fixed on the teacher. He was even more handsome than the night before; Kakashi thought it was a great coincidence to see him again in such a short time. His mind had drifted during the day to moments from the night before: Iruka unable to hide that he liked the food; Iruka smiling; his laughter; the way he gradually made himself comfortable...
On the other hand, the brunette tried to focus on playing with Mirai, even though he was aware of the alpha's gaze on him. What was he doing? Evaluating him? He tried to hide it as much as possible, but he could feel the uncomfortable sensation of cold sweat running through his body — and inevitably a slight feeling of warmth as well. But Iruka had not yet made the connection between Kakashi and the trigger for that warmth.
Yet.
It didn't take long for Kurenai to call everyone to sit down at the huge, immaculately set table. She had gone all out for dinner: a series of dishes was served on the surface, such as donabe rice with seasonal mushrooms and roasted vegetables; strips of grilled meat with miso and citrus soy sauce, served with caramelized onions; a warm salad of sweet potatoes, spinach, and boiled eggs, with Kurenai's healthy and tasty sesame dressing — Mirai loves it — and assorted mini onigiri with mild fillings such as grilled salmon and umeboshi. Iruka was honestly feeling like he was having the best week of his life: eating good, homemade food two nights in a row.
The topics of conversation varied around the table, but at one point, the teacher became the center of attention because of a comment from Kushina.
— You're Naruto's favorite sensei, Iruka-san.— — She said with a little smile on her face. She was sitting between Minato and Kakashi, facing Iruka. Asuma was at one end of the table while Kurenai was at the other. Mirai was next to Uncle 'Ruka and on the other side of him was Gai, who had previously greeted him with a pat on the back and said something about the youth he carried in his veins.
Anko and Tenzo occupied the remaining seats, one on each side of the giant table.
The brunette smiled awkwardly at the unexpected comment.
— He's a great boy...
— You can tell the truth,— Minato interjected — Naruto is a lot of work, isn't he?
Kushina turned to him with her fist clenched. Iruka chuckled softly.
— It's true that he's a great kid. He's just distracted sometimes, but everyone gets distracted. Besides, he tries hard. Very hard. He never gives up...
— He's just like his mother. — Minato teased, casting a loving glance at his wife. They were a beautiful couple. Iruka could say that Naruto had his father's appearance and his mother's mannerisms.
— Sakura loves Iruka too. — Kakashi interjected, drawing everyone's attention. Iruka felt his face flush at the alpha's intervention and blinked a few times in his direction. He ate with enviable elegance.
Even when eating, Kakashi exuded sensuality.
It wasn't fair.
— Iruka-sensei is adored by all his students because his youth resonates with theirs! — Gai interrupted before Iruka could say anything, slapping the younger man on the back, causing him to choke. — I'm sorry...
— It's okay, Gai...— Iruka said after taking a long sip of water.
The conversations at dinner continued to flow in an entertaining way, with everyone interacting. Mirai, sly and demanding Iruka's attention, amused the teacher and distracted him from the occasional glances Kakashi cast at him, as if the two were confidants.They talked a little about Kakashi and Tenzo's work—both were police officers—how they had met Asuma; how Kurenai and Iruka had met as well; Gai's troubles at the beginning of the semester; and even the fact that Iruka was a doctoral student came up.After everyone had eaten their fill, dessert was served: milk flan prepared by Iruka especially for Mirai and fresh fruit on sticks, such as mango, strawberry, and watermelon, cut into star shapes, which Kurenai made with the excellent help of her daughter, who cut everything into specific shapes. As soon as she ate Uncle 'Ruka's delicious dessert, Mirai was overcome by an uncontrollable sleepiness. Kurenai put her to bed, and, as only adults were left, she decided to serve small cups of sake to those who were not driving. This was not the case for Iruka or Kakashi.
At one point, Iruka got up from the table to go to the bathroom. When he came back, he checked his inbox—there were a bunch of emails from Orochimaru that he was determined to ignore because it was Friday...
— PhD candidate at Tokyo National University? You didn't mention that yesterday.
Kakashi had to stop popping up in front of him like that.
— Oh, I... I didn't see an opportunity... Not that I want to brag, there's nothing to brag about, I just—
— It's okay, Iruka. I'm just kidding. — Kakashi laughed at the beta's embarrassment, raising his hands to show he was at peace. Iruka sighed, relieved.
— Okay, sorry.
— No need to apologize. What exactly do you research? — The alpha asked, genuinely interested.
— It's very boring, you don't want to know...
— I'm asking. — His voice was soft, polite. — I want to know, please.
How could he refuse?
Iruka swallowed hard and nodded.
— I study... Amphibians. — The omega shrugged, pointing to the embroidery on his chest, which made Kakashi raise his eyebrows.
— Frogs, then?
— Yes. I study how frogs and toads in urban areas use chemical communication to survive and communicate. In my master's degree, I did research that involved mapping frog populations in school areas and interviewing students, teachers, and staff to understand public perception. Many people have a very... controversial opinion about frogs, but many fond memories also came up. Not everyone hates them...
— That's very interesting. Can I read some of your work later?
Iruka didn't expect that interest.
— Y-yes.— He was taken by surprise. — I'll send you my dissertation by message... I have the file...
— Great, Iruka-sensei. — He flashed another one of those smiles that made his eyes shine brighter than his mouth. Iruka looked away, aware that he was going to blush.
— Is Sakura home alone?— He changed the subject immediately.
— No. She went to sleep at a friend's house, Ino. You know her well.
— That's right. They've always been great friends... — Iruka looked back at Kakashi, the heat inside him more controlled now.
— Yes. I think it's great that she goes out like that. Sometimes I feel like Sakura... Never mind.
— No. — Iruka denied, his gaze truly focused on Kakashi. — You can vent to me, Kakashi-san.
The alpha stared into his brown eyes for a long time. Those eyes were inviting: they made Kakashi want to feel loved as he had once been in his life, during a time now long gone.
He relaxed his shoulders, letting the walls around him crumble for the first time in a long time.
— I feel like Sakura is alone. And I feel like it's my fault, which hurts me even more. — He sighed. — She was very close to the family of my... my former partner. We didn't talk about it yesterday, but he, unfortunately, passed away. Ten years ago.
— I'm sorry. — Iruka looked at him not with pity, but with empathy. It was a feeling he understood well. Kakashi smiled sadly. His heart was racing, but he didn't feel bad.
— Thank you .— He murmured his thanks and ran his hand through his silver hair before speaking again: — And after everything happened, his family didn't want anything to do with us anymore. It was a horrible situation, and I don't want to dwell on it because it's too painful... But Sakura's best friend, Sasuke... — He knew that Iruka knew Sasuke. He was in the same class as Sakura. — My partner was Sasuke's older brother. And after everything happened, the Uchihas abruptly distanced themselves, and Sakura was devastated. She lost so many things, so many people at once... And I feel like it's my fault.
— I'm sure it's not your fault. You... You're carrying a burden that isn't yours, Kakashi. — Iruka whispered in a soft, comforting tone, his eyes shining beautifully. The alpha felt an overwhelming urge to hug him, yes, to hug him tightly with his arms and never let him go. The urge only increased as he was enveloped by the familiar, strong smell of coffee, accompanied by notes of vanilla.
An aroma that clearly came from Iruka this time.
— Iruka...
— Sakura told me a few things.— He seemed oblivious to what was happening. — I don't know everything, but I told her that sometimes people do cruel things without thinking. And that you're not a cruel person, Kakashi, you would never do anything to hurt her on purpose. You're a great father and Sakura loves you very much, she just feels...— She feels very out of place sometimes. It's not a lack of love. It's not a lack of anything at all, I think it comes from the trauma she's suffered. And it's not your fault, you're actually...— Iruka paused. — You're her safe haven.
Safe haven. Sakura's safe haven.
The words reverberated inside his mind like echoes in a cave. Kakashi was speechless. He had never felt so comforted by words alone before; not in a long time, actually. He was so perplexed that he didn't notice Iruka panting as if he were hot, the back of his neck and face turning red at that moment. The smell of coffee seemed to intensify around the two of them; Iruka knew what was happening, and he could smell the aroma of smoke and dry amber. And he knew where that smell was coming from.
— Kakashi-san, I have to go... Forgive me. — he said abruptly, already moving away from the alpha. The silver-haired man tried to reach him, but Iruka disappeared down the hallway before the older man could even touch him.
Kakashi hadn't hugged him. He wanted to have hugged Iruka.
Notes:
If the parts about biology courses are confusing, please forgive me, I'm just a history student lol
hope you have liked...
kakashi is very hot here bc i am listening to all the voices inside my head.
next chapter is going to be really good (very kakairu centric, ok? all I can tell)see you next chapter! kisses!!!!!
Chapter 7: Amber
Summary:
Iruka needs to avoid Kakashi. But that won't happen.
Notes:
hope you all enjoy the chapter <3
song: Enchanted - Taylor Swift.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
This is me praying that
This was the very first page
Not where the story line ends
My thoughts will echo your name, until I see you again
These are the words I held back, as I was leaving too soon
I was enchanted to meet you
That had been the most chaotic week of Iruka’s life. Definitely. But we have to start from the beginning.
Last Friday, Iruka had fled from Kurenai and Asuma’s house. He didn’t want to, but the intrusive heat in his body increased with every passing second. And he knew the trigger for it: Kakashi and his pheromones.
Even though Kakashi himself hadn’t even noticed that he was emitting pheromones too — the scent of smoke accompanied by strong notes of dry amber. It suited him so well, and it was delicious. The alpha seemed oblivious to what was happening, as if he were unable to sense any pheromones, including his own.
However, Iruka knew that he had already smelled it. At his friends’ house, when he whispered the teache’'s name, “Iruka”, there was a gleam in his dark eyes that he had never seen before.
A gleam that reflected lust.
A gleam that, just remembering that look, made Iruka want to feel hot.
He wanted to hear the alpha whisper his name like that again.
Unlike the night before, Iruka didn’t stop the car. Even intoxicated by the feverish state he was in, he drove straight home. Luckily, he didn’t encounter any neighbors in the garage, on the way to the elevator, or in the hall between the apartments. He opened the door and was greeted by Chibi’s meow. Although happy to see him, she remained lying on the sofa with her white, fluffy tail swaying from side to side in the air. Iruka mentally thanked his cat for not demanding too much attention from him, because what he did next that Friday night was not pretty and not appropriate for Chibi to see.
He closed the bedroom door, took off his shoes, and put the bracelet Mirai had given him in its special place — even though he was almost dying of lust, yes, that was the feeling, he would not neglect something the little girl had given him as a gift. He sat on the edge of the bed, spreading his legs and immediately staring at his hard member, struggling for space as it was suffocated by the friction of his clothes.
Fuck, Iruka cursed mentally as he unbuttoned his pants with one hand and stuck it inside and through his underwear, determined to relieve himself as he had done the night before. His face was completely red: a mixture of the suffocating heat and the shame of doing this again after a meeting of less than fifteen minutes with Kakashi.
Kakashi was his trigger.
He felt even more ashamed that it had all happened after Kakashi had opened up to Iruka about such a delicate and sensitive subject. It made Iruka feel dirty, impure, like a whore.
Maybe that was what he wanted to be. Maybe he just wanted to be Kakashi’s whore.
He wasn’t thinking straight while he played, Kakashi’s face flashing through his mind. The sculpted shape of his face, his mesmerizing mouth, his dark eyes, his white hair and his drawn eyebrows...
Iruka still couldn’t get enough.
He lay down on the bed and sighed heavily, feeling his body boil as if it had been thrown into hot oil. He quickly took off his pants and shirt, soaked in sweat, and curled up on his side as he tried to relieve himself from the front, even though it didn’t help.
Then Iruka began to delirium.
He wanted Kakashi to be lying behind him, his broad chest against his back, his hips locked, his steady, heavy breathing against his neck. The alpha of his fantasy would take Iruka in his arms abruptly, in a delicious and violent way. The omega wanted to hear his voice, saying his name softly:
“Iruka. I’ll take care of you.”
He would let the alpha do that. The big, strong hands would touch every inch of Iruka, as if he were a treasure to be explored, while the brunette let out soft, sly moans and writhed against him. Kakashi would wrap Iruka’s cock between his long, well-defined fingers while the omega felt his huge member against his own ass. Hard and throbbing.
Iruka would only be satisfied if he were filled by Kakashi. When every inch of him was being pushed by the alpha.
He wouldn’t be satiated if he kept doing that, from the front. He cursed in a whisper, sweat sticking to his whole body as he reached back with one hand to touch himself there. He was extremely wet — and that had never happened to the omega before. Because his body, until he met Kakashi, functioned exactly and perfectly like a beta’s.
Now, he seemed to have gone into heat. Like the night before.
But today it was even worse. Iruka wanted to be filled, wanted to feel someone —Kakashi — behind him, wanted to feel his strength, those hands, those arms around his waist. He wanted to tie himself to the alpha, to make a knot. Things his body had never demanded before.
Until he met Kakashi.
Iruka touched himself as he imagined once again that the alpha was behind him. The silver-haired man would embrace him with his arms around his waist and hold Iruka’s face with one hand. Their breathing would be out of rhythm, accelerated, both unable to breathe regularly. Their lungs would burn from lack of air, but neither of them would care about that detail.
Iruka would cry with pleasure. Not that he had ever cried in bed before — no one had ever made him feel so much pleasure to that point — but Kakashi would do that. In his wildest fantasies, Iruka always cried as a result of feeling enormous waves of pleasure. With Kakashi, it would be overwhelming.
And Kakashi wouldn’t judge him. He would like it and say:
“You're beautiful when you cry, ‘Ruka.”
And they would kiss, united in every sense of the word.
Iruka came. It was a complete mess; he would need to change the sheets the next day. As delicious as the orgasm had been, and as powerful as it had been, he still wanted more.
He couldn’t sleep that night. The fantasies with Kakashi seemed endless, and his body didn’t cool down for a single second.
{...}
The next morning, Iruka had to admit out loud that there was something very wrong with him. So, even though it was Saturday morning and he was swamped with tests and research pending, he got ready, fed Chibi, had breakfast, and went to the hospital.
He was under medical supervision for his condition. The professional’s name was Senju Tsunade — yes, the same last name as Professor Jiraiya, because the two were married — and she had not shared Iruka’s situation with her husband, as he was her patient and that was confidential information.
Little did Tsunade know that things were about to change.
Luckily, Iruka was able to fit into her schedule. Even though it was Saturday, she worked until 2:00 p.m. Tsunade was a national and international reference in the field of omega hormonal health and psychophysiological intervention for heat cycles and suppression. He had been undergoing periodic exams to monitor his lack of pheromones for several years with the doctor, and she had already told Iruka that he was a peculiar case of an extremely recessive omega.
Unfortunately, it seemed that his case was unique.
That particular morning, Iruka was anxious. His leg was shaking and he was biting his cuticles, even the ones that were injured, feeling restless. He also felt filthy, as he had spent the night fantasizing about the father of one of his students.
He was really dirty.
He had to wait fifteen minutes of torture (waiting) until they called his name. Iruka already knew the way to Tsunade's office, the door was open with the words “Dr. Senju Tsunade” written on a silver plaque in the center.
— Excuse me... — Iruka announced his entrance quietly, attracting the woman’s attention. She was sitting at her desk, looking at her MacBook, but immediately turned her brown eyes to Iruka. Her serious expression turned into a smile.
— Good morning, Iruka-kun! — She stood up, crossing to the side of the desk to hug him. Tsunade was very fond of Iruka, and the feeling was mutual. She was wearing a long, low-cut, sleeveless green dress with a comfortable gray lab coat over it. Her blonde hair was loose, and on her feet were her usual low black heels. Iruka always found her elegant, especially when she was near him: he was wearing black sweatpants, a red sweater, and Vans on his feet. He had gotten ready in less than five minutes.
— Good morning, Tsunade... — He greeted her after the hug, and the two took their seats at her desk.
— So, what brings you here so suddenly today, dear?
— Well... — Iruka slid the folder with the results of the tests he had taken at the screening before going to the office across the desk. Tsunade took the folder with both hands, her nails impeccably manicured and painted red. She always had her nails done. — This is it... — Iruka didn’t know how she would react.
Usually, doctors maintain a calm demeanor so as not to alarm their patients. Tsunade was an eccentric professional, like her husband, but her reaction...
She opened the folder, took out the tests, and it took her less than a second to widen her eyes as she analyzed the numbers there.
— What? — The cry was automatic. She slapped the table and stood up, staring deeply into Iruka’s eyes. — You had a 250% spike in pheromone emissions last week and you only came to talk to me today?
Iruka shrugged.
— Yeah...
— Iruka. Iruka, my dear. — She took a deep breath and sat down in her chair, her fists clenched. — Don’t you see the seriousness of the situation?
— I was... busy...
— Too busy to take care of your health?! — she raged, then opened a tab on the computer, turning the screen toward him. It was a graph with a straight line always at zero. — This is your pheromone emission history. Always at zero. And now... — She picked up the paper and waved it in front of him. — You’re showing me an absurd number! You emitted the equivalent of ten heat cycles for a normal adult omega in one week. And you had never emitted a single pheromone before.
— I don't know what happened...
— Something happened. That’s a fact. Tell me about your week. What was different? Surely there was a trigger for... for you to awaken. So to speak, Iruka. — She stared at him with a kind of seriousness that only a woman like Tsunade could display.
— I already know what happened. — He took a deep breath, causing the doctor to arch her eyebrows. — There’s this alpha, and I... I lost control? Of myself? — A blush inevitably spread across the teacher’s tanned cheeks, because he knew that Tsunade would immediately understand what “losing control” meant.
— I understand. — That was all she said at first, leaning back in the chair where she was sitting. She continued to stare into Iruka's brown eyes, her gaze indecipherable to the omega at that moment.
— So...? — Iruka needed answers. He didn't like the silence.
— We already knew you were a special case of recessive omega, right? — Iruka nodded. Omegas and alphas could be born either dominant or recessive. It turned out that Iruka was not only recessive, that is, his genes were apparently “erased”, but he was recessive squared. How funny. — My hypothesis is that this particular alpha awakened your pheromones for reasons of affinity. Which means that until then you had never met an alpha who was really aligned with your organism, to explain it in simpler terms. Did you... Did you have an affair? Anything physical?
— What?! No! He’s actually the father of one of my students... — Iruka retorted in less than a second.
— Okay. Do you think you might have a relationship in the future?
— N-no! Like I said, he’s the father of one of my students... — He felt like a broken record repeating the same words.
— Listen to me carefully, Iruka-kun. Your pheromones need stability right now. You can’t lose control in public. That would be dangerous on many levels, especially for you. The results indicate that you could go into heat at any moment, even right now, because of contact with this alpha’s pheromones. — He nodded as she explained. — My recommendation is that, since you don’t intend to have a relationship with this alpha... Stay away from him as much as possible. Because he is the trigger, and we are going to stabilize your pheromones so that you only have one spike in their level during the month, just like all other omegas. Okay?
So, it was simple. He just needed to stay away from Kakashi.
The problem was that Kakashi had always appeared suddenly to Iruka. He had never really predicted when the alpha would show up.
But now he could do that. He could avoid him from now on.
Right?
The brunette swallowed hard as he nodded, apparently understanding everything very clearly.
— Right. — He repeated affirmatively. Tsunade narrowed her eyes and turned them back to the computer screen. She quickly typed something, and then the printer started working, spitting out two sheets with the typed words. Tsunade picked them up and stamped them.
— You’re going to start taking suppressants. To avoid those, um, moments of loss of control. They’ll also help with the pain, I know it hurts, especially at first. You’re not alone, Iruka. I promised your parents I would take care of you. — She smiled as she slid the papers to him. Iruka nodded, a weak smile on his face. — I’m also prescribing contraceptives.”
— Contraceptives...? — Iruka’s eyes widened.
— You never know. I know you’ve accepted your infertility your whole life, but even though you’re a recessive, you’ve always been an omega, Iruka. And I imagine you don’t really want children right now, in the middle of your doctorate...
— No way, ma’am! — He denied emphatically, eliciting a laugh from the blonde woman.
— Great. Take your medicine properly and stay away from that alpha while we stabilize your pheromones, okay? I’m counting on you.
— You can indeed count on me.
Iruka felt more relieved now.
But his promise to stay away from Kakashi lasted exactly one week.
{...}
He was on his way to lunch with Genma on Friday when the accident happened.
Iruka had always been an exemplary driver. He never drove too fast, never passed anyone, always let people pass him... He was truly the definition of a good driver. But that didn’t mean he was immune to accidents.
No one was hurt. The collision had been minor. The result? A slight scratch on his rearview mirror, and for Iruka, a dented bumper. Wonderful. But the man in the other car seemed to have been shot in the chest after the two parked to talk about what had happened, as civilized people should do.
— This is your fault, you idiot! You think just because you look like a nice guy you can cut in from the right?! — The man, who was probably only a few years older than Iruka, immediately yelled at him. He was an alpha, Iruka could sense his pheromones. The problem was that, in the last week, Iruka himself had also been a pool of irregular pheromones, even though he hadn’t seen Kakashi in days...
He had only thought about him every day.
— I didn’t cut right. You made an irregular turn... — Iruka tried to explain to the man, who clearly didn't want to listen. He didn’t yell, in fact, he spoke very softly with his hands in front of his body making appeasing gestures.
— Uh-huh, sure. You think you’re smarter than me? — The man puffed out his chest at him, his brow furrowed. — I want to settle this at the police station. I don’t need to trust your judgment, especially since you were wrong! — He finally crossed his arms over his chest, still staring at Iruka as if he were the worst person in the world.
The omega tries to take a deep breath. His hands are shaking a little now, because he is also angry at being unfairly accused, and he shoves them into his jacket pockets so that his anxiety isn’t so obvious to this stranger. He remembered, at that moment, that his mother always tells him that staying calm is the best remedy for any situation. As much as he wanted to feel anger, he doesn’t allow himself to be overcome by it; at least not there, because he needs to act like an adult, after all, he is an adult. He can feel the pheromones — yes, his own pheromones! — evidencing that feeling around him, as if he were a normal omega. He wasn’t losing control of them like before, but now his body was moving to align his moods with the manifestation of pheromones; something that is common and characteristic of alphas and omegas. The smell of alpha spreads subtly, but nothing that other people could notice as abnormal.
— As you wish. — Iruka forced a smile at the man. — Let's go to the police station, then.
The man nodded, satisfied with at least one thing. They agreed on which police station they would stop at: the closest one, of course. Iruka, now calmer, couldn’t imagine what exactly, or rather, who exactly was at that very moment in the chosen police station. Fortunately, he sent a message to Genma canceling their weekly lunch; that way, his friend wouldn't be waiting for him at the restaurant like an idiot.
{...}
The police station was large and filled with countless noises, which did not go unnoticed by an anxious Iruka: the phone ringing on the counter, the keys on the police officer's keyboard in front of them, the smell of cheap disinfectant that had been used on all surfaces of the establishment to keep it looking acceptable. Iruka, honestly, could barely feel his legs as he explained for the third time what had happened. He tried to keep his voice steady, but the sweat on the back of his neck already betrayed his fatigue and stress, while the man next to him refuted everything he said about the accident. And Iruka wasn’t lying, but that alpha was making him feel like a complete madman!
The essence of coffee escaped uncontrollably, dense and slightly bitter, like a drink forgotten in the teapot — Iruka had tried to maintain control, but he was definitely releasing stress pheromones. On top of that, he was starving, because they were literally resolving that situation during his lunch break. Iruka could, at any moment, curl up in a fetal position and cry. He had taken all the suppressants recommended by Tsunade daily, and had no more unusual reactions such as an overwhelming desire to have sex with someone specific, but at the same time, the pheromones were really aligning with his mood. And they inevitably spread to everyone around him what Iruka was feeling: at that moment, he was stressed. The police officer at the reception desk disguised his reaction, as if he were immune to the increasingly present smell of coffee in the room, emanating entirely from that polite omega. The man who had hit the brunette’s car was still grumbling beside him, crossing his arms as if he had been offended by Iruka’s existence. He had been in the same posture since they got out of the car.
— You should pay more attention to traffic. — said the man. — These streets are not for distracted people. — He clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes. — I want compensation. He’s going to have to cover the costs of my car. — He was now referring to the police officer, who was focused on writing the accident report on his computer screen.
Iruka almost responded, but swallowed hard. He wanted to disappear, but at the same time, his mother’s words, her advice, still echoed in his head. He had to stay calm, and even though it was beyond his control, at that moment the pheromones subsided a little, which lightened the atmosphere for a few moments.
However, it was at that moment that a door opened with a muffled creak.
— Iruka-sensei?
The voice filled the noisy environment, silencing all the other sounds that were overwhelming Iruka’s mind at that moment. The omega turned toward the source and stared at Kakashi, yes, Hatake Kakashi, in the eyes. The silver-haired man stood before him, a few meters away, in a police uniform. The dark blue button-down shirt perfectly covered his muscular torso, just as the pants hugged his shapely legs. He was dressed just like Iruka imagined once, after Sakura revealed to him he was a police officer. Actually, the real vision was indeed better than what he pictured. His face was fully exposed, and he looked a little tired. He must have been on duty since the day before, perhaps, Iruka guessed. They hadn’t seen each other in a week — Iruka had suddenly left Kurenai and Asuma’s house after feeling he couldn’t control himself. Accompanying Kakashi was a subtle scent: dry amber, with something slightly burnt, like wood smoke. Iruka found it... comforting.
— Kakashi-san... —The teacher murmured, tension dissipating from his shoulders for a moment. He should remember Tsunade’s words, and her strongly worded medical recommendation: Stay away from that alpha, since you won’t have anything. He will only worsen your instability. But Iruka couldn’t obey that right now, because Kakashi was precisely the anchor that would keep Iruka from being carried away by instinct.
— What happened?
The inspector crossed the room with firm steps, heading toward Iruka. He had glanced at the man next to him, now silent. He had noticed the shiny badge on Kakashi’s chest, and it seemed that he had suddenly swallowed all the insults he was about to direct at Iruka.
— It was just a car accident, sir, I’m writing the report... — The police officer at the reception desk replied, but Kakashi kept his eyes focused on Iruka, as if he were the only person in the whole world. Iruka would be lying if he said he didn’t like that attention. As tense as he might be in that situation, he no longer felt helpless because Kakashi was there.
And Kakashi wanted to show Iruka that he could be trusted, for some reason that even the alpha himself didn’t understand. When Iruka left Kurenai and Asuma'’ house a week ago, Kakashi wanted to go after him. He regretted not going. And he still couldn’t understand it.
— I’ll take care of it. — Kakashi said to the other officer, still not taking his eyes off Iruka, and then, in a calmer tone: — Iruka, are you okay? — He was standing in front of him. He could smell that coffee fragrance that always accompanied the teacher filling the air, as if, once again, someone was brewing coffee in a room further away from them.
— It was just a scare. Nothing serious.
But Kakashi didn’t seem convinced. He watched him with a quiet, almost protective intensity.
— Just a scare? — the alpha repeated in a low voice, tilting his head slightly, as if assessing whether Iruka was telling the truth or just trying to stay strong. His voice had sounded soft because he wanted the omega to trust him.
Iruka shrugged, trying to force a tired smile.
— He wants an absurd compensation... — He whispered in a more restrained tone, just for Kakashi to hear, but the man next to him was too attentive for it to go unnoticed.
— Of course I do! — The other man retorted, now less firmly than before, but still a little too defiant for the silver-haired man’s liking. His gaze shifted from Kakashi to the badge on his chest, then to Iruka, as if he were trying to reevaluate his entire stance. —He hit my car...
The inspector didn’t even turn to face him. He just took a small notepad and pen out of his pocket, as if it were a natural extension of himself; as if he had done that gesture more than a million times before.
— Do you have video of the accident? — he asked, without taking his eyes off the paper.
The man hesitated.
— N-no. But—
— Witnesses?
— I... no, either.
— I see.— Kakashi wrote something down and then looked up, for the first time since he had left his office, addressing the man directly: — So it’s your word against that of a high school teacher, a public servant, well-known and with no criminal record. He can hardly stop shaking with nervousness. Are you really going to insist on this? — Kakashi merely raised an eyebrow at him, sounding perhaps a little stiffer than usual.
The alpha took a deep breath, his jaw clenched. But he had no more sharp words at that moment. He looked away from Kakashi and stared at Iruka.
— Forget all that. I... I made an illegal turn. Contact me later so we can fix your car. — The police officer at the front desk had previously written down all of Iruka’s and the other alpha’s contact information. The man took one last look at Kakashi and, cowering, finally withdrew, now much less courageous than when he had arrived, ready to retort anything Iruka said.
Iruka looked at Kakashi, surprised. He blinked once, still processing everything that had happened in that short space of time before his eyes.
— You... didn’t have to do that.
Kakashi shrugged, an inevitably smug smile on his face at the look of genuine surprise on the younger man'’ face.
— I had to. — A pause, his face once again filled with concern. — But are you really okay?
Iruka hesitated for a moment before nodding.
— I am. Just tired. And hungry, because I missed my lunch break with all this going on.
Kakashi let out a sigh, accompanied by that muffled, nasal laugh that seemed to break all the tension in the room. He reached out and lightly touched Iruka’s back. The simple touch, however minimal it may have been, made the teacher shiver all over. Fortunately, he was under the effect of suppressants, even though his pheromones were now more obvious than ever to the people around him.
— Let’s get this over with and get out of here. I’ll take you out to eat, since you abandoned me in the middle of our conversation last week.
Iruka couldn’t help but stare at him. An inevitable smile appeared on his face, followed by an equally inevitable laugh. A spark passed between them at that moment, something restrained, unspoken. The smell of amber and coffee seemed more intense now, as if that small gesture had changed the temperature between them — but now Iruka would not be overwhelmed by the heat as he had been before.
— You’re on duty, Kakashi-san. You don’t have to... Really...
— And you need someone by your side right now. No arguing, Iruka-sensei.
The omega couldn’t keep saying “no” forever. So he accepted.
Notes:
First of all, forgive me for the delay!!!! Last week was chaotic. I had to give a presentation to finish my college course and I was about to give up on EVERYTHING. But now I'm free and I plan to resume regular posts on the weekend (by Monday at the latest)!
I hope you enjoyed it. I wanted to write more, but on top of everything else, I haven't been feeling very well lately. I'm better now anyway...
This chapter has a bit of personal experience in it (I crashed my car twice in the last 3 weeks. I'm fine, but it's always a headache. At least I didn't crash into anyone else's car like Iruka did, just my own #poor thing). tell me what you guys thought of the chapter!!!!!!!!!Kisses and see you next time (it won't be long, I promise! Here in my country, tomorrow is a holiday, so I'll have plenty of free time lol).
Chapter 8: Shelter
Summary:
Kakashi assists Iruka. More than once.
Notes:
surprise!!!!!
I hope you enjoy reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it!song: "Just the two of us" - Bill Withers e Grover Washington Jr.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Just the two of us
We can make it if we try
Kakashi had never been a man who believed much in fate, but perhaps on that particular Friday he had begun to believe a little.
Iruka had left him completely bewildered a week ago. The teacher had said the most beautiful words the alpha had ever heard in his life, and then simply walked away. After everything Kakashi had confessed to him; he had said things to him that he had never said to anyone else, not even his therapist. Iruka disappeared in the blink of an eye, leaving the silver-haired man alone as he stared at the exact spot where the brunette had been standing. He had left only that typical trace of a coffee scent. Was Iruka really a beta? Kakashi was feeling a little crazy about it, because no beta should emit such an intense aroma. Maybe he wore coffee perfume? Kakashi even considered that possibility, but it lasted only a second, because he clearly remembered the lemongrass perfume the younger man had applied for dinner with Sakura. He hadn't worn coffee perfume.
Maybe Iruka was an omega. In fact, Kakashi could never know. He hadn't smelled pheromones since Obito. And why would anyone hide their second gender? Why? Kakashi would very much like to approach the teacher and ask him about everything. He wanted to get to know him. It had been a long time since he had felt this way about someone; that genuine curiosity.
“— I don't know everything, but I told her that sometimes people do cruel things without thinking. And that you're not a cruel person, Kakashi, you would never do anything to hurt her on purpose. You're a great father and Sakura loves you very much, she just feels... She feels very out of place sometimes. It's not a lack of love. It's not an absence of anything at all, I think it comes from the trauma she's suffered. And it's not your fault, you, in fact... — Iruka paused. — You are her safe haven.
Safe haven. Sakura's safe haven.”
His words stayed with Kakashi, as did the sight of his angelic face. Kakashi wanted to have prolonged the conversation. Now he could understand why Sakura had changed after talking to the dark-haired man; he had a natural ability to touch people, to understand them, to read them without much effort. Apparently, he was an extremely empathetic person.
Kakashi had never met anyone like Iruka.
The alpha felt a lot of guilt. Of all the people who could have stayed to take care of Kakashi, he was the only one left. Rin was gone; later Obito. Sakura's biological father was never in the picture — not that Kakashi would trust him to leave the girl. He had wondered for a long time — in fact, he still wondered — why he was left. Why him? Why not Rin? Why not Obito? These kinds of questions were beyond rationality, beyond control, beyond everything Kakashi was used to, and the lack of answers caused him a lot of frustration. But he had never failed as a father, even though he had many doubts along the way. He had never left Sakura helpless, he had always been there for her, as best he could. He was the most present father of all. He had all her drawings bound or scattered around the house in picture frames, as Obito wanted; he had attended all her school presentations, meetings, parties, sporting events; absolutely everything to accompany her and admire her progress. Because, for Kakashi, Sakura was the most incredible being in the entire universe; not just the world. Iruka had seen all this in less than a week and put it into words; words that made Kakashi himself have the same perception in an even more concrete way. And that was... Relieving. He had felt lighter than he had in a long time.
And, for the first time, he didn't feel the guilt hammering in his chest like an uncomfortable pain.
On the night of the dinner, Kakashi stayed a little longer. He took the opportunity to talk to Kurenai, as if he didn't want anything...
— Is everything okay with Iruka? He left in a hurry...
— I think so, Kakashi. — The woman replied with a small smile. — He told me he received a message from his advisor. The guy is a little crazy and Iruka is terrified of him, plus there's the co-advisor who clearly doesn't like him... But Iruka can handle anyone. It's his gift. — She laughed softly. — Why?
— We were talking...
— Hmmm...— She suddenly became very interested. The two were in her living room. Minato and Kushina had already left at that point, and Asuma was talking to the others about some interesting story from the past. Kakashi had taken the opportunity to talk exclusively with Kurenai, after all, she was the person closest to Iruka that he knew. — He told me about dinner at your house. He was all excited...
— Really?
— Uh-huh. You're a very charming man, Kakashi. — He let out a dry chuckle as his mind wandered to imagine Iruka at school, showing that anxiety to Kurenai. Iruka seemed like the type of person who gets very talkative when anxious or nervous. It suits him.
— I'm sure Iruka just sees me as an old guy. Like the father of a student. — The answer made Kurenai arch her eyebrows.
— Kakashi... Please. Less modesty. — She rolled her eyes. — You didn't answer my question. Why? Are you interested in my friend?
The question made Kakashi blink once abruptly.
He was interested, but not in the way Kurenai might interpret it. Was he?
— He's really nice. I wish I had more time to talk to him...
— You had dinner together yesterday and today. What is this? A date?
— Kurenai...
— Okay, I'll stop. I'm sorry. — She raised her hands as if surrendering. — I was joking. Of everyone, yes, Iruka is amazing. He's just very busy. I'm a teacher and I already feel overwhelmed. He has school, college, and a thousand other extension projects... — I think he's going to burn out any day now. I feel bad sometimes, because he's younger and so much more amazing! But I'm a mother, and that's a huge job in itself.
— Yes. — Kakashi understood that better than anyone. Kurenai felt a twinge of guilt: at least she had Asuma. Kakashi, on the other hand...
— Well, huh... — She decided it would be better to change the subject. — I'm not going to make you ask, because you're a discreet guy, but Iruka has dated once since I've known him. And it was his only boyfriend. But that was two years ago, when he started his doctorate and had just defended his master's degree. The alpha's name was... Oh, it's on the tip of my tongue... — She pinched the bridge of her nose between her middle and index fingers. — Mizuki! — She exclaimed loudly. — Iruka doesn't talk much about him, but he was a jerk. Apparently, the breakup was horrible. He never gave me the details...
Kurenai had read Kakashi's mind. He wanted to ask about Iruka's previous relationships. In fact, he wanted to ask everything. And he wanted to ask Iruka himself.
— Ah... He didn't deserve that. — The alpha then paused. — And is he really a beta?
Kurenai choked on her own saliva and stared at Kakashi for a moment with a look of someone who had been caught red-handed. The alpha noticed every movement and found it slightly strange, but didn't comment.
— Of course he is! What a bizarre question... — She forced a giggle.
— Yeah. I always smell... coffee when he's around... — The alpha shrugged. — But that would be strange. Because I haven't smelled anything since... you know. I must be hallucinating a little.
Kurenai nodded frantically. For a moment, she herself had forgotten that Kakashi no longer sensed pheromones because of the way he had suddenly asked about Iruka's second gender. No one knew. Few people knew, in fact.
— Iruka is a teacher, Kakashi. He's always going to smell like coffee.
{...}
Kurenai's words made sense. Iruka was always accompanied by that scent, even now, as the two left the police station to face the early afternoon in Tokyo.
Iruka stared at his own car parked in front, the dented bumper a reminder of that moment of stress. He felt like crying as he approached the car. His poor little car...
— Iruka. — Kakashi's voice filled his ears as he almost lost himself. The alpha raised his hand and held the omega's shoulder in a delicate yet firm gesture. A wave of shivers ran through the brunette's body, who felt his stomach churn with a pleasant warmth. Fortunately, he was taking the suppressants. — Let's take my car. You don't need to drive today, okay? — Iruka stared at him over his shoulder and took a second longer to nod.
— Thank you very much, Kakashi-san.
Kakashi smiled in his typical way: more with his eyes than with his mouth. He gently squeezed Iruka's shoulder before stepping away, taking the lead. He had changed clothes because he was at the end of his shift. The alpha was now wearing a plain gray short-sleeved crew neck shirt, black pants, and casual shoes. It was the most informal he had ever seen the man. Iruka was dressed as usual: a green sweatshirt, baggy jeans, and black Converse on his feet. He was ready to have lunch with Genma and go to the lab afterwards. Plans had changed, and now he was ignoring Kabuto's angry emails about his absence.
He could deal with that later.
Kakashi's car was huge. It was a brand new black Toyota Crown. He was a police inspector, so it made sense.
— Come in, sensei. — Kakashi instructed softly as he put the bag with the uniform in the trunk. Iruka sat in the passenger seat and automatically buckled his seatbelt. The seats were all white leather, immaculate and clean. The car smelled and looked like it was cleaned daily, both inside and out. The organization inside was perfect. It suited Kakashi. Iruka's car, inside, was a reflection of his state of mind, just like his house. It wasn't tidy at all, but he understood his own mess. The alpha then got into the driver's side, interrupting the teacher's thoughts and observations. — The crash wasn't that bad, Iruka. I'll make sure that man compensates you for the damage. Don't worry. — He buckled his seatbelt before starting the car. Iruka shrugged.
— Thank you very much... It just hurts to see Mochi hurt. — Kakashi frowned.
— Mochi?
Iruka blushed. He hadn't thought before speaking, now he had to explain.
— Yes... That's her name. My car. I mean, she's clearly female. And my best friend.
There was a second of silence before the interior of the car was filled with genuine laughter from Kakashi.
— What? Is that funny to you? — Iruka retorted as the man continued to laugh, the biggest smile he had ever seen plastered across the older man's face. It suited him; it made Kakashi look like the sun. Iruka was blushing, and that observation made him blush even more at that moment.
— N-no...— Kakashi replied, catching his breath. — It's... It's really cute. Actually, it suits you. My car doesn't have a name because I'm a boring guy.
— The name is a representation of the bond.
— I see. — Kakashi was still smiling. — You take good care of your things. That's rare.
— Thank you... — Iruka looked away, cowering against the seat.
— Anyway, Mochi will be fine. I can drop you off at home after lunch if you trust Mochi to me, I'll take her to the repair shop. Today. And you can pick her up tomorrow or Monday. It's not a repair that will take long. I can pick her up with you too.
Iruka didn't know why Kakashi was being so kind, but he was appreciating it more than he should have. He looked back at Kakashi, his brown eyes shining.
— I... I can't repay you for any of this...
— You already have. We're having lunch together, aren't we? I'm enjoying your company.
Fortunately, Iruka had taken those suppressants — again. However, the suppressants couldn't control his heart, which leapt inside his chest as if it might burst through his skin and muscle. Kakashi had no idea what effect he had on the teacher.
— O-okay... That's not exactly repayment...
— For me, it is. It's more than enough. — He stopped staring at Iruka and turned on the turn signal, finally starting to drive. — There's a little shop that should still be open, near the park. They make the best umeboshi onigiri in the area. And they sell banana milk in little glass bottles. Kind of retro.
Iruka laughed, somewhat surprised, and looked back at Kakashi, who now had his eyes fixed on the street.
— You're kidding that's what you want for lunch. — It wasn't a complaint, it just didn't seem to suit Kakashi very well.
— No. — The alpha said, absolutely serious. — It's my favorite snack after work.
— You really are a box of surprises, Kakashi-san.
— I could say the same about you, Iruka-sensei. — They both smiled. Kakashi took advantage of the end of the conversation to turn on the radio. The atmosphere was filled with music, coincidentally titled “Just the two of us”. Kakashi really had to believe more in fate, because nothing that happened with Iruka seemed like a mere coincidence. Iruka smiled again and stared out the window while Kakashi drove. The omega felt comfortable and safe in the passenger seat; the scents of the two mingling softly inside the car. A light smoke and coffee; as if they were one.
After a few moments and a few more random songs, Kakashi parked in front of a convenience store inside a gas station, near a park, as he had previously indicated.
The establishment was small, filled with white light and low shelves. The linoleum floor gleamed beneath their feet, apparently having been recently cleaned, and the doorbell jingled as they entered. The cashier was too busy watching videos on her cell phone while chewing gum audibly. Kakashi went straight to one of the refrigerated counters, picked up two large onigiri wrapped in rice paper and two small bottles of banana milk with gold caps.
He paid silently, the woman blowing bubbles with her pink gum as she swiped his card. He and Iruka went outside, crossed the street, and sat down on one of the park benches. The omega unwrapped the onigiri without difficulty and didn't take long to eat it. He hadn't lied or exaggerated when he told Kakashi he was hungry earlier.
— I always forget how good this is. — said Iruka, his mouth still full of rice.
— It's the salty and sweet... — Kakashi commented, taking a sip of banana milk. He had opened both his drink and Iruka's with precise movements and ate more elegantly than the teacher. But he still found him adorable. — Perfect combination.
Iruka swallowed and smiled to himself.
— You didn't have to pay for everything. I'll give you my share...
— No. I want you to accept it, Iruka. Just accept it. — Kakashi didn't sound impatient, just assertive. Iruka blinked, a little surprised, but finally nodded, giving in.
— All right. I accept your gifts, even though I feel like a freeloader.
— Thank you. — Kakashi's gratitude took the teacher by surprise, and the police officer noticed it. He gave Iruka a half-smile. The early afternoon light made Kakashi shine once again like the sun in the teacher's eyes. — You should eat this more often. — Kakashi said casually, even if suddenly.
— What? Onigiri with banana milk?
— No. Things that are good for you.— The alpha shrugged. — You mentioned to me and Sakura that you eat more fast food... That's not good for you, Iruka-sensei.
The teacher was silent for a moment. Every time Kakashi called him Iruka-sensei, he could only think that the alpha was teasing him. But surely that was just his own treacherous mind playing tricks on him.
— Are you trying to take care of me, inspector? — The brunette decided to lighten the mood a little, even though his cheeks felt hot. He was blushing again.
Kakashi still had that damn half-smile on his face.
— Maybe. — He crossed his arms over his chest, the expression on his face still light.
The park bench was hard, the rice had already crumbled a little on Iruka's shirt, but all of that — the simple food, the quiet place, the way the two smells continued to mix — seemed better than any expensive dinner. More real. Even if it wasn't a date or anything like that. Iruka was definitely feeling good, the way he hadn't felt in a long, long, long time.
— How's Sakura? — The teacher wiped the rice off his shirt and finished drinking the banana milk, his eyes fixed on Kakashi.
— She's been great. Last week she slept at Ino's house, and this week too. She's been there since yesterday, since I was on duty.
— Good to know. They're such good friends... Their friendship is beautiful.
— I think Sakura is dating Ino and doesn't want to tell me.
Iruka choked on his drink. Kakashi raised an eyebrow.
— Do you know something I don't, sensei?
— What? — Iruka coughed repeatedly. — I-I have no idea, Kakashi-san, I'm just a teacher who does nothing but teach classes... And fulfill my role as an educator...
— Uh-huh. Very convincing.— Kakashi laughed softly. — You don't have to tell me. Playing the role of a double agent isn't pleasant.
Iruka let out a sigh of relief.
— But it's not like I know much, okay? It's just what I perceive. Things between them... are moving forward. — He bit his lower lip. — That time I talked to her, you know, it was about Sasuke. He's not Sakura's crush, even though I thought he was, the story between them is totally different, isn't it?
It was Kakashi's turn to sigh. He had finished eating and drinking long ago, so he rested his elbows on his knees and stared at his hands as he rubbed them together.
— Yes. It's totally different. — He nodded slowly. — Sasuke... He was part of our family. Iruka frowned slightly, but didn't interrupt Kakashi's explanation. My former partner... The alpha's chest tightened slightly. His name is Obito. Uchiha Obito. Kakashi stared at Iruka out of the corner of his eye, aware that he had the teacher's full attention. — He was Sasuke's older brother. Sakura grew up with him. The two saw each other daily until they were six years old, which was when Obito passed away.
— I'm sorry, Kakashi. You don't have to... talk about it with me if it's too sensitive...
— Thanks, Iruka. But I... I want to talk to you about it. — Kakashi leaned back against the bench, a faint smile on his face. He didn't talk about Obito with anyone. Not with Sakura, not with his father, not with his friends. He talked a lot with his therapist, but never with anyone in his social circle. It was different. He felt that all the guilt he harbored around the subject dissipated, because Iruka would be the last person to blame him for anything. To judge him. Iruka looked at him with preciousness, as if he wanted to hear more even though he maintained a polite and respectful stance on the subject, with care. — Last week, when you told me that I am Sakura's safe haven, I... I've never been so touched before. Since I... I was alone... My biggest question was about this role. The role of father. If I was doing everything “right” if I was enough for her, if I shouldn't have gone in his place... And when you told me all that, I realized that maybe I shouldn't try to understand so much, or question so much. And continue doing what I'm doing, without fear. So, once again, thank you, Iruka-sensei.
— Kakashi... — The omega smiled a small but very sincere smile. — That's your merit. I just recognized it.
The alpha smiled back. The two were sitting side by side, their legs almost touching they were so close. The silver-haired man was once again overcome by the urge to hug the omega, to once again have someone in his arms, to feel Iruka's warm, delicate body against his. To put all those feelings that were swirling around them into physical form.
Iruka's cell phone beeped, breaking the comfortable silence between them.
The brunette broke eye contact to pick up the device, letting out an audible “tsk” at the message on the screen.
— Unpleasant message? — Kakashi felt comfortable enough to ask. Iruka snorted.
— Yeah. Very unpleasant. — He paused. — An email from my co-advisor. The guy hates me... He's asking why I haven't arrived at the lab yet, even though I already explained to my advisor that I crashed my car. I sent him a message while you were getting ready to go out! And Kabuto insists on acting like he doesn't know that... He likes to bother me.
— Sounds like he's jealous. Or maybe he likes you... More than he should.
Iruka let out a loud laugh.
— I'd rather be swallowed by a black hole. — Kakashi smiled broadly at the realization. — But I really need to finish an article for him to review today.
— I'll drop you off at home. I don't want to get in your way. — The alpha stood up and Iruka followed him. As much as they could have stayed talking all afternoon, Iruka really had to meet the previously agreed deadline. They threw the packaging and other plastic in a trash can and returned to Kakashi's car.
The omega gave the coordinates to his building, several soft songs in the same vibe as “Just the two of us” filling the vehicle. It took them just over 20 minutes to reach the building where Iruka had lived since his parents moved away.
— Thanks for everything today. — Iruka said, unbuckling his seatbelt with a sigh. — Really. For showing up there, for the ride... For the onigiri with banana milk.
Kakashi smiled slightly, that same half-smile that made Iruka's heart want to dance in his chest.
— You should thank the idiot who hit your car for that.
Iruka laughed, and with his hand already on the door handle, he hesitated.
— Listen... You've done so much for me today. — He turned, his eyes still shining, but soft. — Let me at least make you some tea now? That way, you can go back to taking care of Mochi with peace of mind.
Kakashi raised an eyebrow, as if pondering. It wasn't the invitation itself — it was the gesture, the tone of voice. The way the aroma of coffee seemed to waft inside the car. Iruka could feel the pheromones surging slightly. He had to take another suppressant pill in a few moments, at most. Fortunately, he was home.
— Tea is always good. — Kakashi finally replied, turning off the car at the same time. Iruka knew it wasn't the best idea, considering his health, but he needed to do something for Kakashi. It would be against his nature to just say goodbye to him after everything. The two walked into the building through the lobby and climbed the two flights of stairs to Iruka's apartment. The teacher turned the keys, and at the sound, a soft meow came from inside the apartment.
— Hi, Chibi. — Iruka was already talking to the kitten when he opened the door. The two took off their shoes and left them in a corner, the omega making room for the alpha to enter and finally closing the door. — I know I usually only come home at night, but today something unexpected happened. — He continued talking, because the white kitten was already sitting in front of the door a few feet away, her tail wagging from side to side and her blue eyes fixed on her owner. She walked up to him and began to rub between his legs, back and forth repeatedly, while receiving his pleasant caresses. Iruka had crouched down to please the kitten while Kakashi watched his apartment closely.
He had a full view of the living room and kitchen. The two-seater sofa was covered with a green blanket to protect it from the cat's hair, and there was a bookcase and plants around it. Iruka didn't have a TV, so the living room was minimalist, but totally suited the dark-haired man.
The kitchen was a tiny room, built into the living room, with cabinets whose paint was worn around the edges. The countertop was filled with various appliances, such as a toaster, blender, and electric coffee maker. Kakashi could see part of the single-door refrigerator: it had a series of kitten magnets on it. Everything about Iruka was stupidly adorable and original. He couldn't help but smile at all those details.
— Please make yourself comfortable. — The brunette's voice filled his ears. Iruka got up and went to the kitchen, leaving behind the backpack that had been in Kakashi's car while they ate, as well as the test folder on a round table between the living room and the kitchen. He put water on to boil on the stove while Kakashi remained standing between the rooms.
But now there was an addendum: Chibi had noticed his presence.
She stared at him with a murderous look.
Kakashi looked from Iruka to the cat, from the cat to Iruka.
— Does she always welcome visitors this cheerfully?
— Well... I rarely bring people here, so she's not exactly used to it... — Kakashi nodded and approached Iruka, walking into the small kitchen. The kitten quickly followed him and let out a meow, this time much louder. She decided to stand between Kakashi and Iruka like a possessive little sphinx, her fur bristling.
— And she doesn't seem to like sharing. — Kakashi commented, trying to keep a respectful distance.
— She's very attached to me... Once I brought a friend here, Genma, and she wouldn't even let him sit on the couch. — Iruka kept his eyes on the water, which was still far from boiling. — You can try, if you want to risk it.
Kakashi stared at the cat with an almost diplomatic look. After a few seconds of tense silence, he tried to risk sitting on the edge of the sofa.
Chibi jumped lightly and settled down next to him, staring at him without blinking.
— I think I'm being evaluated. — He muttered.
Iruka laughed in the background.
— If she purrs, you pass.
— What if she attacks me?
— You're a cop, I think you can handle yourself.
Kakashi watched as Iruka prepared two mugs. The smell of herbs mingled with the subtle — and undeniable — trace of hot coffee that accompanied it. It was still puzzling the alpha, even though all possibilities indicated that it was all in his head... It was so real...
He was really going crazy.
— Hope you feel like here is your house... — Iruka said as he returned with the cups and sat down next to him, Chibi still between them, like a furry wall. — Or at least that's what they say.
They laughed softly, and the silence remained comfortable, even with Chibi's jealousy almost palpable between them. They drank their tea in that atmosphere, without needing to say much. When they finished, Kakashi could smell the aroma of coffee filling not only his nostrils, but every pore of his body and almost every millimeter of the room.
When he looked at Iruka, the teacher's face was red, to say the least. He was panting softly.
— Iruka-sensei? — He said, concerned. He placed his cup on the coffee table and took Iruka's cup from his hands. The brunette was sweating. Kakashi spread his hands over his face, feeling it boil. Iruka stared at him, unable to distinguish things accurately, as if he were intoxicated...
...As if he were in heat.
— Ka...Kashi... — He murmured the alpha's name with difficulty. — I need... I need my suppressant. — He swallowed hard, fighting his own instincts. He wanted to grab Kakashi. He wanted to jump on him. He wanted to be his; even if it was all just biological, it was what he needed most.
Suppressant.
So Kakashi wasn't crazy.
Iruka wasn't a beta. And Kakashi... Kakashi could smell his pheromones.
After ten years.
The alpha then realized the dangerous situation they were heading towards: Iruka's pheromones were out of control. Kakashi could feel his body reacting; reactions he hadn't felt for an omega in a long time. He had to do something.
— Where is it? — he asked Iruka, keeping his voice calm.
— Backpack... — Iruka squeezed his thighs through his pants, his short nails digging into the fabric. Kakashi nodded, and even though his body told him to stay close to Iruka and take him for himself, he got up and went to the backpack. He found the pill pack and filled a glass with water to the brim before sitting down in front of Iruka and handing him both the glass and the pill he had already taken out of the pack. Kakashi could feel his own pheromones responding to Iruka's overwhelming wave; the smell of smoke and amber intensifying and blending with the aroma of coffee with notes of vanilla in a wonderful essence that matched.
An essence that summed up the two of them.
— Th-thank you. — Iruka held back a moan as he took the pill, closing his eyes. He drank the rest of the water, and after placing the glass on the coffee table, he curled up on the sofa. He hugged his legs, keeping his eyes closed because he didn't want to look at Kakashi. He was too embarrassed. — It's very hot in here...
The alpha stood up, and even though he was also close to losing control, he remained firm because Iruka was clearly not well. And he wanted the omega to feel better. He opened all the windows, letting the wind in. Chibi, as jealous as she was, realized that something was wrong and took refuge in the bedroom, leaving them alone. When Kakashi returned to the sofa, Iruka was in the same position, but he was crying softly.
Kakashi didn't know the exact reason, but he could guess.
Whenever Obito went into heat and wasn't with Kakashi, the omega said he felt immense pain. The omegas' bodies adapted to receiving a knot every month as soon as the second gender was revealed. Something that helped Obito was that Kakashi, even before the bite, that is, when the two were still dating, would lightly release his pheromones to his partner, as this helped him to temporarily stabilize his own body.
He decided to do the same for Iruka at that moment.
— It's okay, Iruka-sensei.— Kakashi's voice was low, soft. His pheromones embraced the omega, with the alpha managing to control them with great effort. Iruka was releasing a huge amount of pheromones. Any other alpha would have already lost control. The omega remained curled up, hugging himself tightly. He was still crying. Kakashi allowed himself to approach him cautiously. — I'm here. Shhhh...— He whispered and then wrapped both arms around Iruka, hugging him close. The two slid from the sofa to the floor, and Kakashi spread his legs so that the brunette could settle between them.
His shrunken body leaned against Kakashi's broad chest. He gently released his pheromones, and little by little Iruka seemed to cool down, just as his pheromones slowly diminished. Kakashi stroked his brown hair, feeling him gradually stop shaking, his crying subsiding. He closed his eyes, resting his chin on top of his head as he let Iruka finally calm down.
Gradually, their pheromones were in sync. Iruka was no longer shaking or crying. He no longer felt any pain.
They remained in that position for a few minutes, many minutes, in fact. Kakashi then noticed that Iruka's breathing was slow and steady, just as it is when someone falls asleep. He moved his face away to check and realized that the omega had fallen asleep. He smiled to himself and got up, picking up the brunette carefully as if he were picking up a bride. He walked down the hallway to his room; another room that perfectly reflected the teacher's personality. The alpha laid him on the bed and covered him, leaving the window ajar so that the wind could continue to circulate. Chibi slept at the other end of the bed and did not try to advance on Kakashi. She now knew that Kakashi was taking care of her owner.
And he wanted to be able to do more for Iruka.
He hadn't had that feeling of wanting to protect someone in that sense since ten years ago.
Kakashi sat on the edge of the bed and watched Iruka sleep for a while longer, as if to make sure he was really okay now. He sighed and stood up, his heart beating too fast in his chest.
As much as he wanted to stay until the teacher woke up, he needed to take Mochi to the workshop — as he had promised the omega. And that's exactly what Kakashi did when he left Iruka's apartment.
{...}
[Inbox — Umino Iruka]
From: [email protected]
Subject: Pending delivery — new schedule?
Dear Iruka,
I noticed that I have not yet received the revised version of the document agreed upon for today at 1:00 p.m. I imagine that something unexpected has come up.
If you need more time, I can try to rearrange my schedule, although this will complicate our final delivery to Professor Orochimaru.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Yakushi Kabuto
(P.S.: I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that everyone's time is valuable, not just ours.)
{...}
[Unread messages]
[Kakashi] [5:00 p.m.]: Mochi is already at the workshop.
[Kakashi]: [5:01 p.m.]: Sorry for leaving without saying goodbye.
[Kakashi]: [5:02 p.m.]: You were safe. And well. That's what matters most.
[Kakashi]: [5:05 p.m.]: Please let me know when you wake up, Iruka-sensei.
[Kakashi]: [5:10 p.m.]: You don't have to be strong by yourself all the time.
Notes:
Tell me EVERYTHING you thought of it!!!!!!!!
Chapter 9: Linger
Summary:
Sakura perceives the shapes of love even in silence.
Notes:
enjoy the chapter <3
warning: I cried twice while writing it...
song: "Under Pressure" - Queen, David Bowie.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
'Cause love's such an old fashioned word.
And love dares you to care for
The people on the edge of the night.
And loves dares you to change our way
Of caring about ourselves
Sakura had always seen a golden aura around Obito.
She could no longer remember his face so clearly — ten years after his death, it was a little difficult to remember details as before — But it was crystal clear in her mind that he shone. Of course, she had photos of Obito, and they were scattered around the house. However, while photos capture moments in a way that can be deemed eternal through that capture, there is a range of details that only real life can provide. Only the human eye can capture these small details: and it is precisely these that Sakura would like to remember when thinking of her father. He was exactly like the sun in her eyes. He was always smiling, always cheerful, always seeking to make Sakura feel the same way.
Being with Obito was lighthearted and fun. Sakura felt good when she was with her father.
He was her favorite adult in her young world.
Not that she didn't like Kakashi; she loved him too. Sakura loved both her fathers, just as she loved her mother, with whom she unfortunately hadn't had much contact because of the illness that had taken her away. Kakashi, however, had always been more reserved. He didn't talk about feelings, he didn't talk about the past. But whenever Sakura had any questions about Rin, it was Obito she talked to, because he was always ready to answer her.
Even now, at fifteen, almost sixteen, she still remembered what Obito had said to her when she was six. Even though now she could barely remember his voice. She had videos of Obito, but she could never watch them without feeling a kick in the pit of her stomach, as if she might vomit from so much longing. So his videos remained untouched. She wasn't strong enough to watch them yet.
"— Your mother, Saku-chan, was the most amazing woman I ever knew. If Daddy Kakashi didn't exist, she would certainly be the love of my life.— He used to joke around a lot. Sakura didn't understand very well, but she laughed. She always laughed a lot around Daddy Obibi. — She was even funnier than me. More determined than Kakashi... More beautiful than both of us together...— He still smiled and shrugged. Remembering Rin caused him a twinge of pain, even though there was a lot of light surrounding his memories. — She loved to read. She loved to take care of people. She was going to be an amazing doctor; she was in college when she had you. And she would have been a wonderful doctor..."
Sometimes he cried when he shared too much about Rin, but he never stopped talking about it with Sakura. Once, the little girl asked about the tears, and Obito replied:" It's just that I miss her so much that it hurts my chest. But that's normal, my love, it's part of mourning. We can't let ourselves be overwhelmed by that feeling. I have many beautiful memories with Rin. I keep her in my heart. That keeps me smiling too."
But as much as he said that crying was normal, Sakura had only seen Kakashi cry twice in her entire life. And she remembered that clearly.
The first time was when Obito was taken from them.
Sakura was only six years old. She didn't remember the events in chronological order and with all the details. She still remembered the traumatic event in flashes, as if they were fragments of a movie she had seen long ago.
She was at school. It was time to leave. Obito was never late to pick her up. There he was, at the entrance, waiting for the little girl with a big smile on his face. His spiky black hair was neat as always. He was wearing baggy black jeans with several pockets and a sweatshirt with a giant rabbit print that made Sakura laugh. It was different from the clothes he had been wearing when he dropped her off at school—Kakashi had been on duty since the day before, so the omega had dropped her off and was now picking her up.
Obito always stayed at home because he was a novelist. The best of all, Sakura would discover when she was older.
— Hi, my girl! — She ran to him to be picked up at once. — You're getting heavy, soon I won't be able to carry you anymore... — He pretended to be dramatic as he easily adjusted her in his arms.
— Liar!
— Yeah, you got me, princess. It's a lie. I'll always be able to carry you.
Sakura held out her pinky finger to him.
— Promise?
Obito hooked his pinky finger around hers without hesitation.
— I promise. — He smiled, carrying her with her backpack to the car. — Tell me all about today's class! Did Naruto behave himself? Did Sasuke annoy you a lot? And Ino, did she draw in your notebook again? Sai colored the drawings afterwards, didn't he? — Sakura nodded enthusiastically, confirming everything her father asked. He always knew what was happening at school and listened to his daughter attentively.
— Naruto didn't sit still today, dad...
— He's always like that, isn't he?
— He's unbearable! — Sakura agreed as Obito opened the back door of the car and placed the little girl in her car seat. — Let me put the seatbelt on myself! You can trust me. I'm a big girl now.
Obito smiled and nodded.
— You really are my smart little girl.— He kissed the top of her head. He closed the door and then got into the driver's seat. — You had a busy day today, sweetheart. I want to hear more, but first... Guess who convinced Daddy Kakashi to go with us to the aquarium this weekend?
— Really? — She barely contained her squeal.
— Uh-huh! That's why he's working extra, so he can spend the whole weekend with us...
The car was already moving by then. Everything was happening as usual. The same lightheartedness as always, the same joy that filled Sakura's childhood days.
— You're the best, Daddy Obibi...
— I know, I know. — He joked, now stopped at a traffic light. He took advantage of the pause to look for some upbeat music on the radio. But he didn't have time to stop at any station as usual.
The following scenes were like flashes in Sakura's vision. Even today, when she tries to remember, that's all they are. She heard the sound of glass breaking before she realized that the window next to her had been shattered into a thousand pieces — by whatever. Probably by some tool, like a crowbar. Or just a bat. Not that it mattered. Obito made a sound she couldn't process, but in the next instant, he was in front of her, kneeling in the space between the driver's seat and the seat where her car seat was secured by the seat belt, staring deep into Sakura's eyes.
— Stay still, Saku-chan. Everything's fine. — He smiled shakily. Even at that moment, he was smiling. As if everything really was fine.
But it wasn't. And it never would be again.
Sakura was motionless.
A man shouted something from outside the car. Another opened the door.
Obito made a sound she would never forget. It was half scream, half growl; even though she had never forgotten it, she had never been able to truly process that noise. And then, Obito had disappeared from her field of vision. He had been pulled away by someone stronger than him, and much stronger than Sakura and...
And he never reappeared.
When the girl blinked again, she was sitting on the curb, with her uncle Asuma beside her, dressed in his firefighter's uniform, covering her thin shoulders with a silver blanket from the ambulance. She was wide-eyed, still motionless. Still paralyzed, unable to say a word. She turned her face and stared at Asuma, and he was... He was serious, but there was a different kind of sorrow in her uncle's usually playful eyes.
Why?
But Sakura was unable to verbalize anything.
Then she heard the familiar voice of her father Kakashi behind her. She turned to face him, and there he was, talking to another firefighter. But he was... He wasn't standing as he usually did. His left eye was bleeding, with a vertical scar running across his eyelid and a huge stream of blood flowing from it — which he ignored, because of his despair.
And he was crying. Copiously. He was asking questions that Sakura couldn't make out, but the tone of his voice was heartbreaking. He was a man collapsing. A version of Kakashi that Sakura didn't know and never wanted to know, even though she always wanted to talk more with her father Kakashi.
Sakura had never seen Kakashi cry before. The image was etched in her mind forever. She wanted to run to him and hug him, to be hugged by him. But her body was paralyzed, and she felt like she was actually a ghost: just an observer. Unable to do anything. Even say a word.
So Asuma hugged the little girl. And she cried in his arms, sobbing loudly, finally releasing all the terror, all the fear, all the panic that had caused her body to simply shut down. As if she had broken down.
She asked herself: "Where is Daddy Obibi?"
The second time was during Obito's funeral, a few days later. Very few days later, in fact.
The room was silent, the silence broken only by the rhythmic sound of burning incense, which was a very faint sound. But as the room was engulfed in silence, it was possible to hear the faint burning of the incense. Obito's portrait, smiling as always, rested on a simple altar, surrounded by white lilies and branches of chrysanthemums. He had already been cremated; the Uchiha family did not want to leave their eldest son exposed in a coffin — and Kakashi would not disobey her husband's family. Not that she wanted it done.
Sakura was sitting between her grandfather Sakumo's legs, both dressed in black. He was in a more secluded corner of the room, a little away from the Uchiha family, but still close to Obito's portrait. He didn't want Sakura to be even more traumatized. Sakumo, in fact, would like to take all of Sakura's pain upon himself. His granddaughter didn't deserve this, of all people.
And his heart ached for Obito, who had gone so soon.
And it ached for Kakashi, his only son, too.
The little girl held one of her grandfather's fingers tightly, as if she could prevent him from falling apart too. As if that way she could be sure that the man would not disappear as her father had done. In less than an instant. Sakumo remained silent, being only the support on which his granddaughter could lean.
For her, he was everything at that moment. Her safe haven.
— Will Daddy live in a little jar? — She whispered with genuine curiosity to her grandfather, still unable to properly understand what was happening. But she already missed hearing Obito's cheerful voice. Being held by him, and she seemed to realize that none of that would happen from that day on. It hadn't happened for a few days, actually.
Sakumo smiled sadly, looking into his granddaughter's eyes with disguised weariness.
— Your daddy now lives in everything, Saku-chan. — Seeing the confusion in her green eyes, he sighed softly, but still patiently, just as he should be. — He lives in the smell of rain. In the taste of hot rice. In your pink hair.— He took a strand of her hair, which made her laugh softly in the quiet room. — Everything that involves love involves your daddy, Saku-chan. Just think about love.
— So, can he live in my heart, Grandpa? Just like Mommy Rin?
— Yes, my love. Especially there.
— But I wanted him to live here. With us. Like before... — She sighed in frustration. Sakumo nodded, getting up and taking his granddaughter by the hand, discreetly walking away from the ceremony.
— And he does. Just not in the same way as us. He's with your mom Rin now.
Sakura, at the time, was not very satisfied with the answer. She knew that her dad Obito had disappeared, had been taken by someone, she still felt remnants of that fear... At the same time, she couldn't understand why he wouldn't come back. But she didn't ask her grandfather any more questions, because he was like her dad Kakashi. They had white hair and didn't talk much — that's what Obito taught her.
They left the room, and Sakura let go of her grandfather's hand as soon as she saw her cousins, Itachi and Sasuke, huddled in a corner, alone. They were both sad and dressed in black, like her, even though they didn't fully understand the reality of death. Children can still feel, especially a death as tragic as Obito's. They were eavesdropping on a conversation taking place in the hallway...
...Between Mikoto and Kakashi.
Mikoto was Sakura's grandmother. She was the mother of Obibi's father, as well as Itachi and Sasuke. Itachi was eleven at the time, while Sasuke was Sakura's age. In fact, the two are in the same class. The brothers were actually Sakura's uncles, but because they were much younger than her father, she preferred to think of them as cousins. Sakumo remained distant, but still close, while Itachi hugged Sakura.
However, she could still partially see the hallway.
Kakashi had his back to them and was facing Mikoto. The woman was smaller than him and practically disappeared in front of the alpha's strong body. However, at that moment, both of them displayed enormous fragility. Kakashi was completely silent, which made Sakura understand that it was not a dialogue, but rather a monologue from Mikoto to Kakashi.
— It's all your fault... — She said softly, sobbing through her tears. It was an extremely painful and heartbreaking cry. — It's all your fault... My son... My dear son is gone... — She paused to compose herself. She had clenched her small hands into fists and punched Kakashi's chest, but she had no strength. The gestures were repetitive and light. — My son...
And Kakashi accepted it, like a statue. Motionless. There was an invisible weight on his shoulders that he would carry for the next ten years and probably for the rest of his life, stretching out with him for the rest of his existence, now as an inseparable part of his organism. Just like the guilt.
He didn't say a word.
Sakura hugged Itachi back, feeling her cousin squeeze her, as if to prevent her from moving. But Sakura was flooded with doubts: why was it her father Kakashi's fault? Why didn't he say anything? Why was he accepting it? Why didn't he deny it? Had he really let her father Obito die?
It couldn't be.
Several minutes passed before Mikoto composed herself and walked away from Kakashi. She passed by the children and took Itachi and Sasuke with her. She stared at Sakura for a long moment, her face contorted with sadness and her eyes swollen from tears, and said nothing to her granddaughter. She simply walked away.
When Sakura looked at Kakashi, her father's shoulders were shaking.
He was crying.
This time, she not only saw it, she heard it. He was sobbing. He turned his body partially; his left eye was covered with an eye patch due to the recent injury, but tears streamed vigorously down his right eye, wetting his entire face and dripping onto the floor.
— Hey, little one. — Sakumo's soft voice made her stop looking at Kakashi. — Let's get some fresh air, hm? — She accepted her grandfather's suggestion.
Outside, in front of a field of lilies, Sakura was overwhelmed by the realization that her father Obito had gone to a place where no one could visit him. The same place where her mother was, whom she had never really known. Not even her grandmother, her cousins, her father, or even herself could see them now; and never again.
She realized that, in the car, smiling at her, it had been the last time they had seen each other. It had been the last time they had smiled at each other, her father's dark eyes shining happily at her, as if Sakura were the most precious being in the universe. To him, the little girl with pink hair was all that mattered.
And then she cried too. Sakumo silently embraced her.
{...}
Even ten years later, she still couldn't understand why Kakashi hadn't contradicted Mikoto. Why hadn't he said anything, why had he just let her say all that — and who knows what else — pouring guilt on him that Sakura couldn't see as belonging to him.
What frustrated the girl the most was that Kakashi never wanted to talk to her about it. In fact, about anything involving Obito. He had never shown any openness. As much as the two had gone through — and still went through, because grief is a continuous pain. It never really goes away — the same pain, the same grief, the same situation... Sakura felt absurdly distant from her father emotionally. Sometimes she felt that he was absent in that sense.
And he was.
Kakashi wasn't a bad father. He was caring and loving in many ways, but he had never shared a conversation about feelings with her. And Sakura really wanted someone to talk to about how she felt.
All that silence was gradually turning into frustration. Frustration that Sakura was inevitably taking out on Kakashi more and more.
And the two saw themselves walking toward that relationship with visible cracks on the surface, as if they were heading hand in hand toward a dead end.
She didn't feel alone at all. Sakura had made many friends at school: Ino, Naruto, Sai, Shikamaru, Hinata, Kiba... She could spend hours talking about her friends. She had her grandfather, her uncles Minato and Kushina, Asuma and Kurenai, Mirai, and Kakashi himself had always made it clear that he would do anything for her. Literally anything. But Sakura often felt out of place, because a part of her life had disappeared overnight after Obito's death.
And Obito's death itself had been a huge trauma for him. Because his death, besides being sudden, had been completely planned by other people. She didn't know the details, but at that point she was smart enough to understand that it was related to her father Kakashi's work as a police officer. She knew that those people who attacked Obito and Sakura, whoever they were, had ambushed Kakashi's family with the aim of hurting him.
And they succeeded.
They had to move house. They changed cars. Neither of them could drive that car after what had happened anyway. Kakashi had even considered moving out of town at the time, but he didn't because it would have been even worse for Sakura. He decided to move closer to his father and, consequently, lived near Minato and Kushina as well, which helped Sakura a lot, because she ended up developing a stronger bond with Naruto, their only son.
But the bond with Naruto would never replace the friendship she had nurtured since childhood with Sasuke.
Sakura had known both Naruto and Sasuke since they were little, in fact. But Sasuke was practically a brother to her. They were the same age and had very similar tastes. They had always been close to each other. Talking to Sasuke in childhood was the best part of the little girl's day. Of course, she liked Itachi too, but he was older. And he was different.
After Obito left, things with Sasuke were never the same again. Because neither Mikoto nor Fugaku would ever forgive Kakashi for what happened to their eldest son. So, not only Sasuke, but Itachi, Mikoto, and Fugaku — her grandparents, who had once been so present — disappeared from Sakura's daily life all at once. Their absence hurt like ripping a bandage off a raw wound.
In Sakura's mind, Kakashi had allowed them to leave by remaining silent. For her, his silence was confirmation that Kakashi agreed with everything they said. Sakura wasn't wrong, but she disagreed. She thought her father should have fought harder for Obito's family to stay with them.
But he did nothing.
He remained silent: and it was always this kind of stance that Kakashi took in complicated situations.
Sakura couldn't accept it, let alone understand it. Especially after knowing Naruto for so many years, the blond had taught her that the last thing people should do was give up. His mother had the same ideology, and Sakura admired the resilience of both of them. She wanted to be like them. She saw Kakashi as someone with the opposite mindset, behaving in a way that was totally different from what the two of them preached.
She often felt like grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him, as if that would wake him up.
Sakura understood that she couldn't change the past. Obito was no longer among them, nor was Rin. The two were truly on another plane. Still, she had kept her grandfather's words in her heart and repeated them like a mantra.
"Your daddy now lives in everything, Saku-chan. He lives in the smell of rain. In the taste of hot rice. In your pink hair. Everything that involves love involves your daddy, Saku-chan. Just think about love."
She didn't just remember Obito with the rain, with the taste of hot rice, in her pink hair. She remembered him whenever she read a book, because both reading and writing were two of his great passions. She remembered him whenever she passed in front of the aquarium or the zoo, outings they loved to do. She remembered him whenever she went to the market, another outing he had instituted for Sundays; something they always did together, he, Kakashi, and Sakura. She remembered him whenever she ate pancakes, whenever Kakashi tried hard to make her favorite breakfast, which had been a fun creation of Obito's. She missed the little animal faces that the omega made with great care, but she respected Kakashi. Sometimes they still hurt him a lot, anyone could see that.
Especially Sakura, who lived with him every day.
It might not seem like it, but she admired him with all her heart. As much as some aspects of his personality were still unknown to her and they had their disagreements like any normal family, none of that erased the love that surrounded them. Sakura loved her father with all her heart. She would like to be, someday, half the person he was — and she would be satisfied, because Kakashi was an incredible adult.
He just wasn't perfect, because no one is.
He didn't express himself with words, but with actions. Just like Sakumo, who constantly showed up at their house with the excuse that he had something to fix. Sakura's heart would flood with affection every time she liked something, like a specific strawberry-flavored cookie, and Kakashi would make a point of buying boxes and boxes of that exact cookie. Once, he had bought a small box of yellow kiwis for them to try — and Sakura absolutely loved them. She devoured everything on the same day. The next morning, Kakashi returned with the trunk of his car filled with boxes and boxes of kiwis.
She ate a lot, and they even had to give boxes of yellow kiwis to friends, relatives, and neighbors so they wouldn't rot, because as much as Sakura liked them, she couldn't eat them all by herself. But she was always undeniably happy with her father's displays of love and affection.
He was also always present at all performances, events, and meetings that required—or did not require—his presence. Kakashi had footage of all of Sakura's school performances. Photos. Awards. He had always been in the crowd. Sakura always felt the pleasant anxiety of scanning the crowd with her bright green eyes, and it didn't take her long to find the silver-haired head. For a while, there had been two heads: silver hair and spiky black hair. After that tragic moment, only Kakashi. Sakura never stopped smiling when she noticed him, just as he always smiled back, his eyes always smiling more than his mouth.
At every science fair — Sakura and Naruto's favorite event — Kakashi was there. It was a little strange that he and Iruka had never met before, because the omega had been Sakura's teacher for quite some time, but some things are meant to happen at specific moments in people's lives. It was as if neither of them was ready to meet until that particular year.
All the drawings, absolutely all of them, that Sakura had ever made were framed throughout the house. Obito kept everything, and it was Kakashi's idea to frame them specifically, and he said that even after she went to college, moved away, got married, and had children, the drawings would remain there. Not that Kakashi wanted her to move away... He always made it very clear that Sakura could live with him forever, the alpha didn't like the idea of Sakura moving out.
She couldn't help but think about how lonely he would be when she went to college.
Sakura didn't see Kakashi as a burden, but it worried her. Even though she was just a teenager and aware that he was an adult with a job and friends, Kakashi was alone. He never had another relationship after Obito. Sakura didn't know, honestly, how she herself would react if her father introduced someone, but she knew it wasn't normal to shut herself off like that.
And to remain closed off ten years later.
Not that there is a right time to get over trauma or people. There definitely isn't. People function in individual cycles, each with a different time frame, that's obvious.
Sakura didn't know if she would like to see her father with someone else. Especially since she had always admired his relationship with Obito and modeled herself after them for future — and current — romantic relationships she would establish. But what she did know was that she would like to see him happy. She knew that Kakashi wasn't entirely unhappy. They had each other. She was also very happy, despite her grief. Grief inevitably coexists with our reality; it becomes part of everyday life. Sometimes it can weigh heavily on the heart.
The girl knew that Kakashi deserved love. He had a lot of love to give.
Kakashi, to Sakura, was the person who knew how to love more than anyone else. Even though he was terrible at expressing himself with words, he was completely made of love.
There had to be someone alive who deserved all that love and could give it back to Kakashi. Sakura knew and felt that this would happen.
That didn't mean, she repeated, that she would react well when her father introduced someone else. It just meant that she knew it wasn't a question of if, but when. Kakashi needed to heal first...
...And Sakura knew she could help him.
However, the first step was the hardest: he needed to open up.
That would take a lot of time and patience.
Sakura, on the other hand, had no trouble opening up when it came to her feelings. Of course, she wouldn't confide in just anyone or a stranger she met on the street, but when she trusted the person, it wasn't complicated.
It had been like that with Iruka-sensei.
Sakura had always had a special appreciation for the teacher, even before high school. He wasn't her teacher at the time: Iruka only taught classes starting in the first year of high school, despite being the supervisor of the science fair that involved the entire school, starting in the early years. Two years ago, when she was in elementary school, Sakura had hurt herself. She had badly scraped her knee, and Iruka had taken care of her while Kurenai called Kakashi. Before Kakashi arrived, Iruka had returned to his classroom, but he had been kind and spoken softly to Sakura:
— Be careful from now on, Sakura-chan. But don't stop playing.— He had gently stroked her hair, and Sakura had felt absurdly comforted by his melodious voice. Since then, she had started to notice that teacher more in the hallways. When she entered high school, she got to know him properly, and her admiration for him only increased.
In addition to being a great teacher, Iruka was able to win over all of his students. Even Sasuke, who had become an extremely reserved teenager, seemed more relaxed in the dark-haired man's classes. Naruto was also very attached to Iruka. He exuded a natural friendliness, as well as seeming to be able to understand anyone who came to him to talk. Even though, often, all Iruka did was listen. But it wasn't just listening: he knew how to listen attentively, as few people are truly capable of doing.
She missed her childhood best friend. Sakura had often tried to reconnect with Sasuke, especially at school. Mikoto and Fugaku weren't around to keep them apart, so she had thought at first that Sasuke would want to talk to her. But he started ignoring her, as if they had never even been friends. Much less family.
They were part of the same family. Even though Obito was no longer physically present, Sakura would never stop seeing the Uchiha as her family. Even though they had distanced themselves from her and Kakashi all at once.
Even today, ten years later, she tried to make more subtle attempts at reconciliation. But Sasuke never reciprocated and never even gave a sign of reciprocation. But Sakura had no intention of giving up, especially with Naruto's support. In fact, the blond would never let her give up, by the way.
Still, even with that mindset, things didn't get any easier. One of those days, after yet another failed attempt to talk to Sasuke — he hadn't even glanced at her and remained focused on the literature book he was reading, even though it was break time — Sakura felt pathetic, exhausted, and worn out. So, instead of meeting up with the others that particular afternoon, she sat alone on one of the benches near the herb garden that the biology club took care of, hidden between the school buildings.
The conversation that will be narrated below is the dialogue that will result in Kakashi's invitation to Iruka to have dinner at his house.
It was there, sitting and almost imperceptible, that Iruka saw Sakura, with an unopened juice box beside her and her gaze lost on the floor. That day, he also didn't feel like staying cooped up in the teachers' lounge, and whenever possible, he liked to spend his breaks near the garden that the club he led, as a science teacher, took care of.
Sakura didn't look well. Iruka knew that some people like to be alone when they are overwhelmed by unpleasant thoughts, but he had been her teacher for a long time and knew that Sakura was not like that.
He didn't ask if she wanted to talk as he approached her slowly. He just sat down next to her, leaving a comfortable space between them.
— Everything okay, Sakura?
She shrugged, not looking at him.
— So-so.
Iruka didn't insist. He remained silent for a few moments, watching the leaves swaying in the light breeze. Then he took a small packet of strawberry cookies out of his bag. Her favorites, which Kakashi bought in bulk to stock up on for the sole purpose of making her happy.
A pleasant coincidence.
— Would you like one?
Sakura accepted with a shy nod. They remained silent for a few seconds, chewing slowly, only that sound filling the space between them, until the girl broke it with her words after swallowing.
— Sometimes, — she said, without warning and still not looking at Iruka, staring ahead and at the floor, alternating between the two specific points. — it feels like I'm invisible. Like... I do everything I can to try to talk to him, but it's as if I'm transparent. As if I've done something horrible that I don't even know what it is.
Iruka looked at her calmly. He didn't seem surprised, just attentive. His brown eyes sparkled as usual.
— Are you talking about Sasuke?
She nodded, her eyes beginning to burn with invading tears. She didn't want to look at him, otherwise she knew she would burst into tears. And it wouldn't be cool or pretty; it would be embarrassing.
— I know he's dealing with his own stuff. I think he is. But... We grew up together. He was my best friend. We were like family. And now he acts like I'm just... Another student. Just another person, Iruka-sensei.
Iruka inhaled slowly, weighing her words mentally. He didn't know exactly what she was talking about, he didn't know much about their families and how they were connected, but he understood that, at that moment, his role was not to ask questions. On the contrary, when he decided to become a teacher, he had decided to do so because he wanted to help his students, not just be a transmitter of content for them — far from it. So his voice, when it came, was calm. Low enough to be just the two of them there, at that moment.
— It's hard when someone important to us changes in a way that hurts. Especially when we don't even understand why.
Sakura didn't respond immediately, but he knew she was listening.
— And it's easy to start thinking that the problem is with us. That there's something wrong with who we are... Or what we failed to do... Or what we could have done...
She bit her lip. That thought was all too familiar.
— But that's not true. And thinking too much about the past can lead us into a pit too deep to climb out of, Sakura. Sometimes we're just in a moment where the other person can't see who we really are. — Iruka continued, his voice still soft. — And it's okay if that hurts. It's human to feel that way. But it's not your fault. Know that the problem isn't you.
Sakura turned her face toward him for the first time. Her eyes were moist, but she held herself together. Her green eyes shone with doubt and insecurity, but at the same time, she had clung emotionally to Iruka with all her might.
— What if no one ever likes me... the way I am?
Iruka smiled kindly.
— Someone will. The right person will come along. And sometimes, before that happens, we need to learn to like ourselves first. Because who you are is enough. It's more than enough. Even on days when it doesn't seem like it.
She said nothing, but her chest hurt less. In a strange way, she felt lighter. As if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders without her even noticing. Sakura knew she didn't talk much about her feelings at home, only with her friends... So this was one of the few times an adult had really listened to her and said words that were truly valuable, that really connected with her feelings.
— You talk like a therapist. — she murmured with a half-smile, breaking the mood a little and bringing even more lightness between them.
— It's just that I teach science. And teenagers are much more complicated than organizational charts. — he replied, winking at her. Sakura laughed in response, drying the corners of her green eyes with her hands. For Iruka, that was enough.
— Thank you very much, sensei. — she said after composing herself, a wide, genuine smile lighting up her face. Iruka felt his heart warm even more inside his chest, as if Sakura's words were literally embracing him from within at that moment.
This was what he wanted to feel when he chose to become a teacher.
— You don't have to thank me, Sakura-chan. — He replied, his voice as soft as ever. — You can always count on me, okay?
— Okay.—
The two exchanged one last smile before hearing Naruto's familiar hoarse voice calling for Sakura. She said goodbye to her sensei and ran to where her clumsy friend was calling her. He was startled by her appearance, as if Sakura had sprung up from the ground. Iruka watched them from afar, aware that he had helped Sakura, but unaware of how deeply he had touched the girl's heart.
Little did he know that she would be eternally grateful for that brief conversation.
{...}
— What happened to you? — Kurenai said in an amused tone as Iruka got into her car.
— What do you mean? — The omega replied, frowning, as he fastened his seatbelt.
— You look... very rested. — She sounded surprised.
— Oh, well, I... I slept a lot. — Iruka blushed, rolling his eyes in embarrassment as he recalled the last few hours.
To provide some context: it was Saturday morning, and Iruka had scheduled another appointment with Tsunade. He called Kurenai to ask her to accompany him, if possible, because he wanted to tell someone what had happened on Friday, that is, yesterday.
Even though he was dying of embarrassment.
Even though he wanted to dig a hole in the ground and stick not only his head, but his whole body inside.
Since Asuma was off for the weekend, he stayed home with Mirai while Kurenai readily agreed to accompany Iruka to his appointment with Tsunade, the great pheromone doctor.
— Well, so, what did you have to tell me? — Kurenai spoke again now that the car was moving, on the way to the hospital. She was wearing gym clothes: leggings, sneakers, a pink tank top, and her black hair was tied back in a low ponytail. She looked very pretty. Iruka was dressed as usual: jeans, a loose-fitting printed T-shirt, but he had also opted for sneakers. His hair was loose and damp because he had taken a cold shower after reading Kakashi's messages.
Kakashi's. Messages.
He hadn't replied.
He had viewed them, but hadn't been able to reply.
Not yet, okay?
— Before I speak, promise you won't say anything or interrupt me?
— I promise.
— I went into heat in front of Kakashi.
— WHAT? — She almost crashed the car at that moment. Iruka grabbed the door handle.
— Kurenai!
— I promised, but you could have started your explanation differently! What do you mean? Heat, you? Kakashi, when, how? — They stopped at a red light and Kurenai stared at him with wide, red eyes, incredulous. She looked like a child discovering new words and using them in a disjointed way.
— There was no other way to start... — Iruka sank into the seat, hiding his face with his hands. — It all started the day he asked me out. — Kurenai was about to say something, but Iruka moved his fingers aside to look at her with one eye. — Please don't interrupt me... — She nodded, defeated. — I've been feeling strange since that encounter. I thought it was because he was so handsome, but no! My body... My body just reacts to him, Kurenai. It's biological. After dinner, I also felt strange, hot and... and... — He was red as a tomato. — You know. But I had never felt anything like that since I revealed myself as an "omega"— he made sure to use quotation marks with his fingers — I had never been in heat. And with Kakashi, things just... — Unfolded at once. Last week I went to Tsunade, my doctor, and she told me that I had a 250% spike in pheromone emission. I'm a biologist, not a doctor, so I don't know what that means! But it doesn't seem like something a normal person can survive.
Kurenai agreed. She was paying attention to Iruka and the streets, having to use all her mental concentration.
— She told me that since we're not partners, he would continue to destabilize my pheromones. If we were partners, it would be different, because then he would be essential in the stabilization process. So Tsunade instructed me to stay away from Kakashi. As much as possible. And I agreed! Because I had already had dinner at his house and dinner at your house had passed, so when would I see him again? — A pause. — But then, on Friday, I crashed my car. Actually, I was hit. Yesterday, right. And guess who, exactly who, was at the police station...
— Hatake Kakashi.
— You're a genius.
— I know. But go on, Iruka, or I'll explode.
— Okay, sorry. He was there and he was so kind, Kurenai. He defended me, because the guy who hit me wanted compensation even though he was in the wrong... He was a complete jerk, and Kakashi looked so hot in his uniform, you know, and defending me, it was like I had taken it all out of some fantasy of my own...
— Iruka. Focus. Finish the story.
— Okay, okay, okay. Focus! — He spread his hands on his cheeks. — He said he would resolve the situation. Then we left Mochi at the repair shop because her bumper was dented, and he dropped me off at home. Besides, I hadn't had lunch, so we ate together at a restaurant and he paid for everything... He wouldn't let me pay, and I still feel bad about it.
— Iruka! Focus!
— I invited him upstairs because I wanted to repay him somehow. I offered him a cup of tea, and he accepted without hesitation. We went upstairs, and everything was fine. I was going to take my suppressant with the tea, as Tsunade had prescribed, but before I could even take the pill, my body... My body betrayed me. And I started to feel hot right there in front of Kakashi, and to cry... Because it hurt so much... — He shrugged. — I had no idea it hurt so much.
— And Kakashi...?
— He felt it right away, Kurenai. Of course he felt it. I could see it in his eyes. He was sweating too, but he kept his composure. He opened all the windows and hugged me, releasing pheromones to calm me down. Then I fell asleep. And it wasn't even five in the afternoon! I only woke up today at seven, which is when I sent you a message. That's why I'm so rested.
— He felt it? Can you guarantee that?
— Yes? I think so. And he was releasing pheromones too...
— Iruka, I... I'm going to have to say this.— Fortunately, they arrived in front of the hospital. Kurenai parked and turned to face Iruka. — But what I know about Kakashi is that he hasn't felt or emitted pheromones since his partner passed away. It's a biological condition that trauma can trigger in alphas and omegas.
Iruka froze at the information simply dumped on him. He froze in the middle of a hand gesture, frowning and blinking frantically.
— But I felt it. I felt his pheromones. And I know he feels mine, because... Because it smells like coffee. — Iruka blushed. — The first time we met, he kept staring at that stain on my shirt... Now I understand. It was coffee. That's the smell of my own pheromones...
Kurenai blinked once. Twice. Three, four times.
She was remembering the conversation she had with Kakashi two days ago.
"— Yeah. I always smell... a smell of coffee when he's around.... But that would be weird. Because I haven't smelled anything since... You know. I must be hallucinating a little.
— Iruka is a teacher, Kakashi. He's always going to smell like coffee."
How wrong she was when she said that to Kakashi.
She felt like an idiot.
— What is it? — Iruka asked, frowning.
— You're right. He... He can smell your pheromones.
— Why are you saying that now?
— Because he mentioned it to me.
— He mentioned to you... About my smell?
— Yes, Iruka. — he said. — And we both dismissed it, but... But it makes sense now that you've told me everything that happened. It's just a little shocking and unexpected. And inevitably I'm wondering now: why? After ten years. And specifically you...
— Is it a bad thing that it's me?
— No, you idiot! — Kurenai gritted her teeth, but Iruka laughed. Despite everything, he had to laugh. — Your doctor must have some answers. Come on, it's almost time for your appointment.
Iruka sighed, and barely had time to protest, as Kurenai was already getting out of the car and walking toward the hospital. He followed her, went through the usual screening, and they waited for a few moments until the name "Umino Iruka" was called for the appointment. Kurenai would not accompany him inside, she would wait for him there at the reception desk.
— So, what brought you here so early? — Tsunade asked after cheerfully greeting him with a hug, just like last week. Now the two were sitting across from each other.
— Well, I... I was away from the alpha for a week...
— A week...? Exactly the time since we saw each other...
— But yesterday I met him. And I went into heat in front of him.
— Iruka! What about the suppressants? Didn't you take them?
— It was time to take them, but I didn't have time... — He shrugged. — The important thing is: nothing much happened. He managed to control himself, got the medicine for me, and hugged me. He kept releasing his pheromones until I fell asleep... — Tsunade listened attentively.
Iruka still remembered the moment he woke up. His body felt heavy after so many hours of sleep. He stretched, kicking Chibi in the process. Then, when he picked up his phone a few moments later, he sat up abruptly in bed, startled by Kakashi's messages. His messages brought back all the memories of the previous day at once.
[Kakashi] [5:00 p.m.]: Mochi is already at the workshop.
[Kakashi]: [5:01 p.m.]: Sorry for leaving without saying goodbye.
[Kakashi]: [5:02 p.m.]: You were safe. And well. That's what matters most.
[Kakashi]: [5:05 p.m.]: Please let me know when you wake up, Iruka-sensei.
[Kakashi]: [5:10 p.m.]: You don't have to be strong by yourself all the time.
Iruka hadn't replied. Yet.
He was, honestly, dying of embarrassment. He never wanted to look at Kakashi again in his life. He had gone into heat —his first heat? — in front of him. He must have sounded pathetic as he cried, moaned, and asked him for things in a clearly affected voice.
Iruka was a disaster.
— What do you mean, "no big deal"? Iruka, dear, I...I need to meet this alpha. He may be essential to your treatment! This completely changes things. You told me you didn't have that kind of relationship.
— But we don't... He was just being polite...
— Iruka, really, he was very polite. Any other alpha would have taken advantage of you, because they're all scoundrels, but you apparently hit the jackpot. — She was focused on the computer screen, typing furiously.
— I just found out something about him that you might be able to help with.
— What? — She raised an eyebrow, stopping typing on her MacBook. — Does he have a partner...?
— No, well... He did. A mutual friend told me that he hasn't emitted or felt pheromones since his partner... passed away. But I felt his pheromones, Tsunade, and I'm sure he feels mine. I'm not crazy.
— Ah. — She brought a hand to her chin, thinking about the new information. — Iruka, what you have is not unheard of, but it is extremely rare. Your body functioned like that of a beta due to the absence of active ferial receptors. You were a recessive omega with a blocked response. But that block seems to have been broken upon contact with a biologically compatible alpha. It's like a key. — That alpha... Unlocked you, in a way.
— Right. I already knew that...—
— But this alpha... Tell me, what else do you know about his partner?
— Kurenai told me it was horrible. It happened ten years ago. Both he and his daughter still suffer from the loss. — Tsunade didn't need any more information.
— I don't know him, but I can say that he suffered from what we call post-traumatic feral inhibition. His grief was so deep that his nervous system shut down the entire pheromone pathway, which is a self-protective response. But for some physiological reason, that is, compatibility... He started emitting again. And only with you, Iruka. She paused. You two are compatible. I'd say it's fate! What's his name?
— Hatake Kakashi...
— Hatake Kakashi. — Tsunade typed into a document on her computer screen. — Excellent. That means Hatake Kakashi may be experiencing induced pheromone reactivation, something that, to date, has only been documented in three clinical cases in Japan. And none of them were spontaneous, my dear. — She looked at him intently. — And all of them involved the presence of a highly biologically compatible omega...
— But why me? Tsunade, I'm practically a failed clinical case. I only found out I was an omega because my genotyping came back positive. I've never had spontaneous heat, never emitted pheromones before last month. Before weeks ago! You yourself always said that my body... Masks everything.
— Yes, you are an atypical omega. More precisely, a recessive omega with basal neurochemical inhibition of the subcutaneous pheromone gland. — She raises her eyes. — This means that, for genetic and possibly epigenetic reasons, your body has never fully activated the hormonal pathways that regulate heat cycles, nor the consistent emission of pheromones. Your body never found it “necessary”. And that kept you functionally beta for over twenty years. I mean, you easily pretend to be beta to those closest to you, dear...
— Until now.
— Exactly. — Tsunade stared at him over the MacBook screen. — The spike you had last week, 250% above the baseline average, is something that can only happen if the gland is restructuring itself. In other words, your endocrine system has been activated in some way. And the only new variable in the equation... is him.
Iruka buried his face in his hands for a moment, unable to look at the doctor again. He could feel the pheromones of frustration hovering on the surface of his skin.
— I'm destabilizing. Again.
— Yes, but now it's different. — Tsunade said firmly. — Before, your body was trying to react to something it didn't know. — Now, it's reconfiguring itself to bond with the specific alpha that triggered this process. It's as if it's biologically trying to form a bond.
— A bond? — Iruka repeated, startled, his eyes wide. — But that doesn't happen spontaneously, right? That's something out of a soap opera! You just talked about clinical cases...
— It's not common... — She admitted — but it can occur in recessive omegas who have had their system dormant for many years. It's like a security system trying to find a “master key”. And when it finds it, it starts trying to regulate itself by it.
— I am his key. And he is mine... — Iruka whispered, astonished. — And is that bad?
— It's delicate. — Tsunade sighed. — Because Kakashi may still be in a post-traumatic pheromonal state. He spent years without feeling or emitting pheromones, right?
Iruka nodded slowly.
— According to Kurenai, since his partner died... Ten years. — He was repeating that information so much that the message weighed heavily on his chest. How much pain did he and Sakura have to endure?
— So his body may still be trying to protect itself. And this reactivation process can cause emotional, sensory, even immunological overload if it is not monitored. — She paused. — That's why I want to take a blood sample from him too.
— What?! — Iruka blinked in surprise. — You want to examine Kakashi?
— With his consent, yes. But don't worry about that now. I want to monitor you, Iruka. Your condition is one of the rarest I've ever seen. If you continue to have intense reactions without monitoring, you could end up with a hormonal collapse. Your reproductive organs are not used to the activity. In fact, we need to monitor them in particular...
— What about the suppressants?
— Common suppressants no longer work as they used to in your case. — Tsunade pointed to the screen. — Your body is metabolizing the doses three times faster than expected. I'll give you a new inhibitor, with molecules adapted to your profile. But for it to work, you need to follow the instructions to the letter.
— I can do it. I swear. — Iruka clenched his fists. — I just don't want to... Go crazy. And I don't want to lose my job if I go into heat in front of the students...
— You won't. But you'll need constant monitoring. And maybe... — Tsunade hesitated. — Maybe you need to talk to Kakashi himself. He also has the right to understand what's happening to his body. And to yours.
Iruka nodded, swallowing his anguish.
— Okay. But... Not today.
— All right. Today you just need to rest and take the new inhibitor. I'll order blood tests and a complete pheromone screening. We'll figure out what's happening to you, Iruka. I promise.
He smiled, relieved inside, or pretending to be. He had gotten Kakashi into this mess, and he would have to explain to the alpha exactly how he was involved in all of this.
Great. How great!
Iruka couldn’t be happier while he thought how he would exactly give Kakashi the news...
{...}
[Unread messages]:
[Kakashi]: [14h07]: Good afternoon, Iruka-sensei. Did you wake up well?
[Kakashi]: [14h08]: Just checking if you are okay. Send me any news... I got a little worried about you.
[Kakashi]: [14h10]: Also, we need to talk. It’s not about Mochi. It’s about what happened yesterday. Please, contact me.
Notes:
what did you guys think?
next chapter is going to be "kakashi's pov" and I dont think you guys are ready for whats happening heheheheheheheheh
Also, 171 kudos!!!! I could never imagine 🥺🥺🥺🥺 thank you all so much!!!
Chapter 10: First date
Summary:
Kakashi and Iruka kinda go on a date.
Notes:
Enjoy the chapter!!!
song: "Espresso" - Sabrina Carpenter.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Now he's thinkin' 'bout me every night, oh
Is it that sweet? I guess so
Say you can't sleep, baby, I know
That's that me, espresso
Kakashi was a controlled man. Organized. Meticulous and systematic, to say the least.
He followed a strict routine, regardless of whether he was on duty or not. He always fulfilled his duties as the rules dictated. He always did everything he could and couldn't for Sakura — the greatest treasure of his life. He had a fixed routine and followed it religiously from Sunday to Sunday, with a discipline that would be absurd for anyone else. He had never dealt with a situation, within this context, that was beyond his control.
But he definitely lost his mind when Iruka went into heat in front of him.
Kakashi acted automatically because he wanted to provide as much comfort as possible for the omega. He took the medicine, opened the windows, hugged him, released the pheromones and the smell until Iruka fell asleep... On autopilot.
He didn't know exactly how he had controlled himself.
After ten years, he could clearly smell the aroma of coffee flooding his nostrils. He could smell Iruka's pheromones. The brunette's need. Besides feeling him against him, trembling, crying softly, and even moaning in that soft tone.
All because there was a physiological need in Iruka that cried out for Kakashi.
Just as the omega had felt, the alpha was not immune.
He had "only" controlled himself.
How? Not even Kakashi could answer that.
He had left Iruka, against his true will, sleeping in bed. What Kakashi really wanted to do was lie down behind him and hug him. That is, if we hide all the sordid details that passed through the alpha's fertile imagination. Yes, that's right. A series of images of Iruka that could be construed as fantasies had taken over the silver-haired man's mind, and he couldn't get them out of his head anytime soon. Nor did he want to, to be perfectly honest.
If he had stayed, he wouldn't have just hugged Iruka. He wouldn't have been able to control himself as he had, appearing civilized and polite. Not that he didn't want to take care of Iruka, but there was a long-hidden and repressed part of himself that seemed to want to return suddenly now—triggered by Iruka's scent, which Kakashi had unexpectedly been able to smell.
He hadn't been crazy in the last few days. In the teachers' room, at dinner, at Kurenai's house... Iruka had always emitted pheromones around him. He wasn't a beta, even though to everyone else he might have seemed like one...
For Kakashi, it had always been different. Although he didn't know the exact reason for it, he couldn't say he disliked it.
He just didn't understand. Yet.
He had left Mochi at the workshop as promised after leaving Iruka's house. He had returned to the police station and had Tenzo's help with the two cars; Kakashi had driven Mochi and Tenzo had driven Kakashi's car. The brunette had noticed that Kakashi was more serious and quieter than usual: he was normally quite taciturn, but he didn't ask any questions. At the workshop, his pupils were dilated. As if the silver-haired man had, I don't know, used drugs...
...But Tenzo didn't ask any questions, because he had never been the type of subordinate to question things.
Fortunately.
After everything was settled and with confirmation that Mochi would be ready to be picked up on Monday, the two alphas said goodbye. Kakashi was finally able to go home, and that afternoon, more than ever, he was grateful that Sakura was away. He picked up his cell phone and sent a few messages to Iruka, genuinely concerned about the omega. He knew that he would probably only respond the next day, considering the conditions in which Kakashi had left him...
...And how he wished he hadn't left.
Now, alone at home and finally able to pay attention to his own body and instincts that had been extinguished (literally) for so long, Kakashi faced his real problem: the huge erection between his legs.
He had felt it happening the moment Iruka stared at him with a flushed face, his cheeks tinged with a blush that suited the omega deliciously. His loose hair framed his absolutely beautiful face. His brown eyes sparkled with lust when they met Kakashi's dark irises. His mouth moved slowly, as if Iruka was having trouble concentrating to move his lips to speak, his voice trembling, unable to contain the moans that reached Kakashi's ears like a melody.
He hadn't felt this way in ten years.
Of course, despite the trauma and the lack of feeling and emitting pheromones, Kakashi still had needs. He was still human and still an alpha in recent years, but he had never felt that almost savage, animalistic need, that kind of attraction that there isn't even a set of words to describe it, because there is nothing rational and much less anything in human reason that can account for that kind of feeling. It was this instinct that Iruka awakened in less than a millisecond. In fact, he had been slowly awakening that feeling within Kakashi since their first encounter, and now it had been just the straw that broke the camel's back.
And Kakashi had to deal with this overflow reflecting on his own body.
He let out a growl, or something similar to a grunt—in any case, it was a practically guttural sound that he hadn't heard himself make in a long time. The space in his pants was small, suffocating, as if his member were literally waging some kind of war with the fabric. He stared at Pakkun out of the corner of his dark eyes, the old dog seemed to judge Kakashi with his tired eyes.
The alpha then headed for the bathroom in his room, where he could finally have some privacy, and once again faced the problem between his legs. He was barefoot, wearing only the clothes he had changed into after his shift ended. Then he leaned against the wall and unbuttoned his black pants with his long fingers, quickly removing his cock from its suffocating confines with his hands. It throbbed and pulsed, hard and thick before his very eyes. The air around the policeman seemed to grow denser, and he could feel his own pheromones filling every possible and impossible recess of the bathroom space. The room, which was not small, seemed tiny at that moment.
He took a deep breath and grabbed his member at the base, biting his lower lip as he began to masturbate. He could smell Iruka's scent in his nose, like a memory. The essence of coffee and vanilla. As if he were a shot of espresso served in front of Kakashi and all for Kakashi. He moaned softly, remembering the heat that the teacher emanated against his body, combined with the pheromones that attracted Kakashi like a magnet. Gradually, he increased the intensity of his hand's movements, sitting up, his whole body dominated by that need. Even though he hadn't sensed a single pheromone or had a partner in the last ten years, he still felt that kind of need — but it had been purely physiological.
At that moment, it was desire. Pure desire driven by libido. Wild, animalistic desire for Iruka.
The omega was crying softly. Kakashia knew that it was probably due to intense pain. At the same time, however, his fertile mind led him to conclude how beautiful Iruka looked when he cried. It was also the combination of factors in his appearance: his dilated pupils, his loose hair framing his face, his red cheeks betraying his heat, and his eyes even larger because of his recent crying. He was beautiful even when he cried.
Kakashia felt the need to make Iruka cry with pleasure.
He could imagine the teacher kneeling before him in the bathroom, completely naked. His tanned skin would glisten under the lights, even brighter. His fingers would run over Kakashi's firm thighs while his tongue explored the entire length of his member — Iruka would ponder how it would all fit in his mouth. Spoiler: It wouldn't fit, but it would be delicious. Kakashi would watch lustfully as the omega tried to encompass the package in his mouth, even though it was impossible. His cheeks would be filled with Kakashi's cock. One of Iruka's eyes would have closed in concentration, and they would maintain eye contact. The alpha would fuck his throat and cum on his face.
The cum on Iruka's face would make Kakashi want to take him immediately, even more. That desire would be fueled by the sight.
He would pull Iruka into a kiss. He would wipe his face and press him against the bathroom sink, where he would fuck him with his arms tightly wrapped around his slim waist. The omega would moan softly as Kakashi filled him carefully, until the alpha was fully inside... Then he would make him scream. Cry. His feet would be writhing with pleasure, just as his back would arch. Kakashi would have Iruka in the palm of his hand, just as Iruka had Kakashi. And they would both cum together.
Multiple times.
Kakashi could imagine various scenarios with Iruka. He had pleasured himself more than once; it would be embarrassing to admit how many times he had reached orgasm just from fantasizing. Not even his volumes of Icha Icha could have prepared his fertile mind for the number of scenes that popped into his head. Kakashi felt, for the first time in a long time, like a teenager having his first rut. And he was a mature forty-year-old man. He hadn't had a rut in ten years, so if he went back to that cycle again, it would be like the first time.
He wasn't prepared to think about it.
Kakashi couldn't sleep at night. The image of Iruka's face, calling out to him, saying his name with difficulty in a moaning tone haunted him. Not that it was bad, but for Kakashi's body, it wasn't enough. He was thirsty, desperate for Iruka — it seemed he needed him more than anything else in the whole world.
And he couldn't have him. Not now.
Kakashi wondered how Iruka was doing in his apartment. He must be sleeping, with Chibi curled up at his feet like a little ball of white fur. The omega was sleeping peacefully when Kakashi left him. He wanted to have stayed, wanted to have hugged him and continued to release pheromones to keep him calm and away from any kind of pain, but he knew he wouldn't be able to control himself. Then he would become the last person Iruka needed at that moment.
He had become that person, but at least he had done it within the walls of his own home. Far away from Iruka.
{...}
Despite not having slept at all, Kakashi followed his routine. He went out for a run, returned home, and read. He had breakfast alone. He was in his office, Pakkun asleep on the rug, when his daughter returned from Ino's house.
— Dad? — She called out to Kakashi from the living room, leaving her backpack on the floor. The dog arrived first to greet her. His joy was not as obvious as that of other animals, but they both knew that Pakkun was happy. Kakashi came right after. — Wow, are you okay?
— I am. — The alpha frowned. — Why?
— You look... exhausted.
— Thanks for the compliment, dear.
— No, but seriously... Didn't you sleep, Dad? Did something happen on duty? — She approached him, sounding genuinely concerned. Kakashi smiled slightly and stroked her pink hair.
— Nothing happened. I just slept poorly.
— Oh, okay. I'll make you something to wake you up! — She immediately turned toward the kitchen, and Kakashi simply accepted. He always accepted everything that came from Sakura.
He followed the girl to the kitchen and sat down at one of the chairs at the table there.
— How did it go at Ino's?
— It was great. We did girl stuff...
— Girl stuff...
— Dad, don't start. — Sakura was focused on the coffee maker. Kakashi knew that now he would be distracted from all the perverted thoughts that had taken over him in the last few hours, as if he were a pervert. Even though he often read the Icha Icha series of books, that didn't mean he was actually a pervert. He was with his daughter now, he wasn't going to get carried away by images and fantasies... — Here. A double espresso! With hints of vanilla... — Sakura placed the huge mug of coffee in front of Kakashi on the table.
The aroma automatically filled his nostrils, and the silver-haired man stared at the brown liquid in front of him in a static manner. He blinked once, twice. Gradually, the image of Iruka's face seemed to form in the steaming coffee, while the smell, exactly like that of the teacher, filled not only Kakashi's recesses, but the entire room.
The whole house.
Kakashi crossed his legs. It seemed as if Iruka were there with them.
— T-thank you very much, Sakura... — He thanked her awkwardly, forcing himself to hold the mug by the handle and take a sip. The liquid burned his throat as it went down, but he ignored it. Sakura raised an eyebrow, also taking a sip from the cup she had poured for herself.
— You're acting weird. Did nothing really happen?
— Nothing at all.
— Nothing at all?
— Nothing at all. — Same answer twice.
— Hm. — She narrowed her eyes, taking another sip. — You're still acting strange...
— Iruka-sensei showed up at the police station yesterday. — Kakashi had been a police inspector for many years. A military man. A soldier. He had interrogated countless times under different circumstances, but he couldn't resist his own daughter's accusing gaze. Sakura was his weakness, and he wasn't ashamed to admit it.
Surprise took over the girl's face.
— Iruka-sensei? Why?!
— Some idiot hit his car. He dented the bumper and still wanted Iruka to pay huge compensation... I had to intervene. Everything worked out, we managed to leave Moc—his car at the repair shop. The jerk who hit him will pay, because I'll file a claim in my own name. That's what happened.
— Oh, poor Iruka-sensei. Is he really okay now? He loves his car. It was a gift from his parents. He told us that...
— Really? He really seemed to be very fond of it...
— Although Iruka-sensei is sensitive about everything. I like that about him. — Sakura rambled a little and finished her coffee, as did Kakashi.
— You like him, huh? He's really very kind. And polite. And friendly. — Sakura smiled at her father.
— What else do you want to list about him? Is he handsome too?
— Yes, he— Hey! Don't fool me like that. — Kakashi got up from his chair, picking up the mug and cup and washing them in the sink.
— You don't fool me, Hatake Kakashi.
— Please call me Dad.
— Okay, Dad Hatake Kakashi.
— Much better.
The two exchanged glances with sincere smiles. The atmosphere was light, in contrast to a period in which the two had been unable to talk properly. Kakashi knew he had to thank Iruka for that — even though he had already done so before, he still felt that he had not been able to convey to the teacher everything he had really done for his family.
But first, he needed him to respond to his messages. He didn't reply to the messages from the previous afternoon. After lunch, Kakashi sent more messages, unable to move on after spending the night awake fantasizing about the teacher.
The replies only arrived on Saturday night.
{...}
After the consultation with Tsunade, Kurenai left Iruka at his building with a warning, an ultimatum:
— Talk to Kakashi. — In a threatening tone.
Iruka just nodded. Two extremely assertive women asked him to do the same thing: contact Hatake Kakashi as soon as possible. He wasn't crazy enough to contradict them, but...
...But he definitely needed courage to talk to Kakashi.
The messages after lunch increased his anxiety even more. Iruka already felt overwhelmed by shame; shame for having gone into heat in front of him. Shame for crying like a weakling; shame for making him witness that deplorable situation. Kakashi knew he was an omega: an omega with serious functioning problems, by the way. The alpha must think he was a failure, just like all the other alphas would think. Just like Mizuki thought—not that Iruka wanted to remember his ex right now, at a time like this. But the thought was intrusive, completely intrusive, because he had erased Mizuki from his mind entirely.
Or not entirely.
Anyway, that's not what matters now. What matters is that, around seven p.m. on Saturday, Iruka still hadn't replied to Kakashi. He was at home, sitting on his bed, with Chibi purring against his thigh as he stared at his phone screen. His computer was also open in front of him, on the email Kabuto had sent him the day before — which he also hadn't replied to.
The brunette had typed and deleted several responses more than a million times at that point.
Thank you very much, Kakashi, for Mochi...
I'm fine, your pheromones really helped me (?)
I'm sorry you had to go through this with me, I didn't even know I could do that (?) (As if going into heat was a superpower?)
The last message of that first batch hammered Iruka's mind: You don't have to be strong all the time.
Was Kakashi worried about him? Didn't Kakashi think he was ridiculous?
It didn't matter much, because Iruka definitely felt ridiculous. He didn't need anyone else to tell him that now.
And, as he thought about the second batch of messages...
I woke up fine, Kakashi-san! How about you?
Don't worry, I'm fine.
Thanks to you.
Thank you very much (again)
This won't happen again (infinite series of crying emojis)
I'm sorry.
Talk... About what...????????????????
He hadn't sent any reply. Iruka wanted to evaporate, or rather, he wanted to abandon his physical body and become just an idea, a concept, a consciousness floating around. That would spare him all this mental effort. He sighed, staring at the screen with Kakashi's messages, and in a completely intrusive thought, he hit his forehead with his cell phone.
— Idiot, idiot, idiot... — He cursed himself repeatedly.
— Are you calling me an idiot? — Kakashi's voice filled Iruka's ears. The omega froze and stared, wide-eyed, at the cell phone screen.
He had accidentally called Kakashi with the tap on his forehead.
The alpha had answered with just one ring.
As if he had been waiting for Iruka to call back.
This realization made the brunette's lower abdomen heat up. But the distraction lasted a millisecond, because once again he remembered that he had called Kakashi. And Kakashi was on the line with him at that very moment.
— Kakashi-san, hi, I-I... — Iruka pressed the phone to his ear, mentally cursing himself. — It wasn't about you, I was cursing myself, I...
— Then I'd rather it was about me.
Iruka blushed. His eyes were still wide. He wanted to disappear, even if Kakashi couldn't come. He smiled and a weak laugh escaped him. It seemed that Iruka didn't know a single word of vocabulary at that moment.
— Why didn't you answer my messages? — Kakashi asked, his voice low and soft. No accusations. No anger, just... Concern.
Iruka wasn't used to that in a relationship.
— I... I went to the doctor.
— Doctor? Are you sick, then?
— N-no, Kakashi-san. I'm sorry.
— You don't have to worry, Iruka-sensei. — Iruka heard him sigh. — You're not alone. I really believe in the message I sent you. Now, please answer me. Did you sleep well?
Iruka felt disarmed. His face was burning.
— Very well.— He smiled even wider. — Thanks to you, actually. Thank you very much.
— No need to thank me...
— Yes, there is. — A pause. — And about meeting up, I'd like that to happen as soon as possible. Please. I also need to talk to you and clear up a few things, Kakashi-san.
It was Kakashi's turn to pause.
When his voice reached Iruka's ears again, it was soft and light, as always.
— Great. — A moment passed. — Are you free now?
And Iruka, despite his shock, answered yes.
— Great too. I'll leave in fifteen minutes to pick you up, Iruka-sensei.
Then he hung up, leaving the omega in a catatonic state for two seconds, because he needed to get changed. He got up from the bed and opened the closet, which, miraculously, was organized today. After dinner at their house, he had learned his lesson. Chibi, still in bed, stared at her owner with a judgmental look as he desperately evaluated various pieces of clothing, his head moving at a million miles an hour.
— Don't look at me like that. — He pouted at the cat, who meowed in response. He picked up a clean navy blue T-shirt and put it on over a slightly wrinkled white button-down shirt. He looked in the mirror. He took it off and tried again. This process was repeated more than seven times until Iruka chose the ideal outfit: a light cream-colored knit sweater with a loose fit on the shoulders and sleeves, and a slight transparency when touched by light, enough to subtly outline the shape of the body without revealing too much. The collar was discreetly V-shaped, revealing the top of her tanned collarbone. He opted for dark wash jeans, without rips, tight enough to fit his long legs, but comfortable. On his feet, a pair of brown boots, made of soft leather and with short shafts, which he rarely wore, but liked. They were different from his usual sneakers.
Iruka ran to the bathroom, where he washed his face, brushed his teeth and hair, and sprayed on lemongrass cologne, hoping the scent would mask any pheromones that might escape. Exactly twenty minutes had passed when he finally declared himself ready, and as if he knew, a message from Kakashi flashed on his cell phone screen:
[Kakashi] [7:40 p.m.]: I'm here.
— Good luck to me. — Iruka muttered to himself and left the apartment, locking the door behind him. Soon he was outside, and Kakashi's familiar car was waiting for him. The omega's heart seemed to want to jump out of his mouth as he approached and opened the passenger door with the handle. Kakashi was obviously in the driver's seat, and Iruka felt dizzy for a few moments, or rather, the moment his eyes met the alpha's figure: He was wearing a gray turtleneck sweater, fitted to his body, made of a thin fabric that outlined his broad shoulders and the subtle contours of the muscles beneath the surface.
Over it, he wore a straight-cut black jacket made of heavy fabric. The jacket's sleeves were slightly rolled up, revealing the cuffs of the gray shirt, and there was a rehearsed naturalness in how everything fit him perfectly, as if he had dressed in two minutes without deliberately trying to look like a magazine model in Iruka's eyes.
— Iruka-sensei? — The silver-haired man's voice snapped the omega out of his fantasy, and he smiled sheepishly, finally getting into the car.
— Sorry, I... I got distracted. — He closed the door and turned to Kakashi. — Good evening, Kakashi-san. — It was the second time in two days that he found himself in a car with Kakashi. It seemed risky for the two of them to be inside a vehicle like this, considering how cramped it was, but fortunately the new suppressors were now taking effect.
— Good evening, Iruka-sensei.— Kakashi smiled. — You look rested.
Iruka smiled awkwardly again.
— Ah... And you look...
Kakashi didn't seem relaxed, despite looking beautiful. Iruka was curious as to why. But he wouldn't ask, of course.
— You look well. — he finally said, which elicited a soft laugh from Kakashi. He seemed relieved to see Iruka, but there was still something, a slight tension, a concern, something in his features and traits that revealed that the lightness and tranquility he exuded were perhaps part of something deliberately posed for the omega.
Iruka hoped that this would disappear when the whole truth was revealed.
However, he was really surprised. Kakashi wasn't upset with him for lying, nor did he seem to consider it a flaw. He just seemed genuinely interested, as he had made clear from the very beginning.
This made Iruka feel special, and he didn't know if he should.
Kakashi started driving, focused on the streets ahead of them. It was Saturday night and they were going out together...
...It was a date, right?
— Where are we going? — Iruka broke the silence. Actually, it wasn't entirely silence: soft music filled the car, coming from the radio. Kakashi glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, still attentive to the traffic.
— An udon restaurant I like. It's not far, and it's not usually crowded.
— Udon? — Iruka asked, raising an eyebrow. — You made the right choice.
Kakashi shrugged, his gaze still on the road ahead.
— I listen to what you say, you know. I know you like noodles.
The sentence took Iruka by surprise, and he turned his face away so Kakashi wouldn't see him blushing. He seemed to never tire of surprising the omega; that damn guy. The alpha, on the other hand, enjoyed Iruka's extremely adorable reactions to his teasing. Even though there was a lot of truth in each of them. The mood between the two remained light for the rest of the trip, mixed with a feeling of "I can't believe this is really happening." That energy came entirely from Iruka.
Kakashi parked in front of the establishment, which was not really full, as he had promised. The two got out and Iruka watched the details closely: the restaurant was cozy, with dark wood walls and amber lights hanging from the ceiling. The aroma of grilled food and mild spices filled the air, and the ambient sound was a comfortable murmur of cutlery, low laughter, and soft instrumental music. Kakashi had chosen a discreet table near the window, away from the kitchen, and Iruka suspected he had done so on purpose, as if he knew that tonight would not exactly be lighthearted.
They had a serious matter to discuss.
Iruka was still silent when the two sat down. He looked at the menu that a waiter brought them, one for each, but he didn't really read anything. His head wouldn't let him, especially with the alpha's striking presence in front of him.
Kakashi watched him over his own menu, elbow resting on the table, as if patiently waiting for the moment when Iruka would explode into words, or just dissolve into a sigh. And it didn't take long, of course. The alpha, despite not knowing him as well as he would have liked, had already understood that Iruka was the type of person who didn't need a little push to talk.
— I've been unblocked. — Iruka announced suddenly, without taking his eyes off the menu. — As you may have noticed, I'm an omega. I lied about being a beta, I'm sorry.
Kakashi blinked, surprised by his choice of words.
— Excuse me? Unlocked?
Iruka looked up, serious, then slumped back in his chair, leaning back and running his hand over his face.
— Unlocked. That was Tsunade's word. — He paused. — She's my doctor... for pheromones. — He looked up at the ceiling. — You're a kind of key, apparently. A biological key... for me.
Kakashi was silent for a few seconds, processing. Then he raised an eyebrow calmly:
— I realized you had pheromones a while ago. Don't apologize to me, Iruka, I just want to understand you and help you... So, explain it to me from the beginning. What exactly are we talking about?
Iruka let out a nervous, short laugh. The teacher sighed and rested his arms on the table, leaning forward slightly. His face was serious now, his expression marked by his anxiety, which could almost hurt. He couldn’t tell what Kakashi was thinking. The man in front of him was impossible to read, but Iruka needed to tell him everything.
— I am a recessive omega. Like... An omega with a “disconnected body.” I never went into heat, never emitted pheromones. I always lived as a beta. Until you showed up. And... Something in me activated. From the first encounter, back at school. — It was indeed quick to explain…
Kakashi stared at him, motionless. He didn't look scared neither angry, he was just absorbing it all. Listening carefully to every word. Iruka thought he would be maybe upset, even though he was not sure why he thought it.
Iruka continued, his voice lower, as if weighing his words on his tongue before speaking. The two made intense eye contact. Iruka could only think that if he hadn't taken those new suppressants, he would have gone into heat right now. Because Kakashi looked at him as if he were the only omega in the world, or rather, as if he were the only person in existence.
— According to Tsunade, this is rare. There are only three documented clinical cases in the entire country. And... In all of them, what caused the change was the presence of an extremely biologically compatible alpha. — He took a deep breath. — Which, in my case, is you. — He didn’t talk about the lab thing and the fact that they were the first “natural” case apparently for something like that to happen.
He didn’t want to scare Kakashi right now. So that could wait.
Kakashi leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. His expression was still serene, but now more focused.
— And what exactly does "extremely biologically compatible" mean? — He asked, raising his eyebrow again.
— That my body basically freaked out when it sensed you. — Iruka ran his hand through his hair. — My entire system started reacting... as if it had been waiting twenty-six years just for you to show up...
— And my body responded back. Something it hadn't done in ten years, since my former partner. — He shrugged. — I know you and Kurenai are friends, so you must know some things. It's okay, Iruka-sensei.
He paused. The silence that followed was respectful. Iruka didn't know the details, but he didn't want to enter a space that was too sensitive for Kakashi, a space to which he still had no right.
The omega nodded slowly, cautiously.
— Tsunade thinks your… Grief caused a feral inhibition. That your body shut down the emission as a way to protect itself. But for some reason, now... you're emitting again. With me. — He gave a tense chuckle. — She wants your blood, too. For tests and analysis! Obviously.
Kakashi raised his eyebrows.
— This escalated quickly.
— I know. — Iruka rested his chin in his hands. — I just... didn't want to involve you in this. Really. I'm taking new inhibitors, I'm doing tests. I just wanted to warn you that... my body may be trying to form a bond. Biological. Without my permission. With yours. — Iruka could have said: “With you.”
There was a long silence; another long silence.
Until Kakashi said:
— It's okay, Iruka. — The way he chose to pronounce the teacher's name slowly made Iruka shiver. — I told you that you didn't have to be strong alone. And that explains a lot about what I've been feeling. I want to follow up on this, this treatment, because, as I already told you, I want to understand. And really help.
The omega felt a genuine urge to cry.
But before he could respond, their bowls of udon were served. The two looked away to focus on the food, which was delicious. Kakashi's choice couldn't have been better.
Dinner went smoothly. Iruka was afraid that the conversation would stagnate on medical terms, but the truth was that it was very easy to talk to Kakashi about anything. The two discovered a shared love of books and literature, even if they were still different genres. They shared a few laughs and some curiosities about each other. An hour ago, Iruka had not imagined that he would be having dinner with Kakashi on the same day that he had spent the entire afternoon in a mental breakdown thinking about how he would respond to his messages.
It had been sudden and unusual and comical, but Iruka felt... Light. The feeling seemed to increase as dinner progressed, and he still felt embraced by this lightness after they left the restaurant. It was colder now that night had fallen. The two looked up at the sparsely starry sky and did not head for the car, remaining standing in the street, their hands tucked into their pockets.
— Thank you for not seeing me as a problem. — Iruka broke the comfortable silence. Kakashi looked away from the sky to the omega, who was staring at the ground. His face was flushed from the cold, with all the concentration of the blush mainly on his upturned nose. He felt like taking his face in his hands, but he kept them forcefully in his pockets.
— I would never do that. — His words came out so easily that Iruka looked up at him. The teacher's face lit up as he smiled at Kakashi, a smile capable of disarming anyone. The alpha felt his heart skip a beat, as if he were a teenager... Once again, Iruka awakened that kind of feeling in him. — Iruka... — His name came without Kakashi thinking.
— Yes...? — Without saying another word, Kakashi embraced Iruka. He took his hands out of his pockets and hugged the omega's body, his strong arms wrapping around his slim waist as he buried his nose in the top of his head, inhaling the scent of his brown hair. Iruka froze for a moment, but, as if the two were a perfect fit, he returned the embrace. He felt welcomed, truly welcomed, against Kakashi's firm, solid body. He was hard, rigid, but at the same time soft and comfortable. It seemed as if Kakashi's arms had been made to embrace Iruka, just as they were doing now, under the dark sky of a night that should have been just another night.
But it definitely hadn't been.
The scents of the two intertwined in a delicate way, not fueled by desire, which, although not explicit at that moment, would never leave them. Not that that was a bad thing. It's just another detail.
Kakashi, for his part, felt for the first time in a long time the absurdly glorifying sensation of embracing someone and wanting to hold that person close, to protect them while sharing the pleasant warmth of a sincere embrace. And that person, undeniably, was Iruka. He could understand what his body had wanted to show him from the very first moment. And he wouldn't go back now. He had been sincere in every word he had spoken and would continue to follow that truth.
Regardless of what came next.
{...}
[Inbox — Umino Iruka]
From: [email protected]
Subject: Re: Pending delivery — new schedule?
Dear Professor Kabuto,
Thank you for your concern about my schedule.
In fact, there was an unforeseen event early yesterday afternoon — fortunately, nothing serious. I took advantage of the situation to reorganize some points of the analysis today and review more carefully the topics that you previously pointed out as “excessively sensitive for the academic environment.”
The new version will be sent by the end of Sunday, that is, tomorrow.
I am available to reschedule our meeting, if you still have time amid your many commitments.
Respectfully,
Umino Iruka.
{...}
[Unread messages]
[Unsaved number] [11:45 p.m.]: Iruka, you may no longer have my number, but I am in Tokyo for a few days. Yesterday I passed by the station where you used to wait for me after class, and I couldn't help but remember you. I thought long and hard before writing to you. I know I wronged you, perhaps more than I can ever make up for, but... even so, I would like to see you. Just to talk, if that's possible. No past, no demands. I just want to see that you're well. Please reply if you can.
[Unsaved number] [11:46 p.m.]: It's Mizuki, by the way. Good evening.
Notes:
tell me what u guys think! love to chat with you...
thanks for the comments, bookmarks, subscrioptions and kudos! 192!!! thank you all guys <333
ps: would you guys read a fanfic about a love triangle between Obito, Kakashi, and Iruka? Dark romance? With the mafia and a very manipulative Kakashi? I've been having some ideas, heheheh... just wondering!!!!!!
Chapter 11: The voice
Summary:
Kakashi deals with ghosts from the past.
Notes:
Hi! It took me a little longer because the chapter ended up being really long... I hope you like it!!
song: Silver Springs - Fleetwood Mac.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
I'll follow you down till the sound
Of my voice will haunt you
(Give me just a chance)
You'll never get away from the sound
Of the woman that loved you
(Was I just a fool?)
When Iruka called, Kakashi had just gotten out of his nightly bath. He had literally just wrapped the towel around his hips, after briefly drying his hair and body in general. The strands that usually spread out in all directions from his head were stuck to the back of his neck, all thrown back because Kakashi had combed them before finishing his bath. Coincidentally, that was the first ring of the call, and the alpha had answered in the same millisecond.
His Saturday had dragged on, especially with Iruka's lack of response. He had lunch with Sakura and then they watched a movie — a common weekend activity for the two of them. Afterwards, Sakura decided to meet up with Naruto in the neighborhood, leaving Kakashi alone. Iruka wasn't responding.
So he read.
He had taken a break from reading to take a shower, and now he was standing in front of the bathroom mirror, his body covered only by a white towel, with the phone pressed against his ear as he listened to Iruka's muffled voice on the other end of the line.
— Idiot, idiot, idiot... — The smirk that formed on Hatake’s mouth when he heard those words from Iruka was inevitable. And the answer was on the tip of the alpha’s tongue.
— Are you calling me an idiot? — Kakashi heard no sound, not even a noise, after he replied. He could imagine Iruka frozen, processing the alpha’s voice. Where would he be at that moment? At home? On the couch? In his bedroom, in bed? Kakashi could imagine several scenarios where the omega might be at that moment. And they all made him want to smile.
The alpha had already realized that Iruka had called him completely by accident and was trying to cover it up. The cover-up wasn’t good, but it was very cute.
— Kakashi-san, hi, I-I... — The omega’s voice filled the alpha’s ears once again. He pressed the phone securely between his ear and shoulder, turning to the mirror and combing his damp silver hair back with one hand, his biceps flexing in the gesture and his shoulders marking stupidly large. — It wasn't about you, I was cursing myself, I...
— Then I'd rather it was about me. — The response was so natural that it might have startled Kakashi himself, if it weren’t so true as well. He could hear a faint chuckle on the other end of the line, but nothing more. Kakashi knew he would have to push harder to keep a conversation going with Iruka at that moment, and that wasn’t a problem for him. — Why didn’t you answer my messages? — His voice sounded low and soft, overflowing with only... concern. He held the phone between his shoulder and the side of his face and reached for his night cream with his hands. He poured a small amount onto his index finger and skillfully spread it over his sculpted face, while patiently waiting for the teacher's response. He could hear Iruka's breathing on the other end of the line, as if the omega was forcing himself to maintain control.
— I... I went to the doctor.
— Doctor? Are you sick, then? — Kakashi raised his eyebrows at the answer, letting go of the cream bottle and holding the phone again with his large hand. He leaned his sculpted body back against the marble sink, resting his other hand on his elbow.
— N—no, Kakashi-san. I'm sorry.
Kakashi sighed with relief.
— You don't have to worry, Iruka-sensei. — He still used a soft tone of voice. You're not alone. I truly believe in the message I sent you. Now, please answer me. Did you sleep well? — He had spoken slowly, in the same patient tone, still without accusation.
All Kakashi wanted was to hear directly from Iruka that he was okay.
After that, it didn't matter.
— Very well. — The biggest smile appeared on Kakashi's face, lighting up his always serious features, was inevitable. His heart seemed to beat faster in response, like a drum filled with the purest joy. — Thanks to you, actually. Thank you very much.
— No need to thank me...
— Yes, I do. — Iruka replied quickly, which was more abrupt than the other responses. — And about meeting, I would like that to happen as soon as possible. Please. I also need to talk to you and clarify some things, Kakashi—san.
That surprised the alpha. He needed a little more time to think, but when he resumed speaking, he had decided what he would do. What he would invite Iruka to do, and where he would ask him to go.
It seemed like an absurdly certain idea.
— Great. Are you free now?
Iruka needed a second to answer, but Kakashi was already used to the teacher’s pauses...
— N—now? — He stammered in response. Adorable, the alpha thought. — Y—yes, Kakashi—san... — The police officer would have waited another half hour without any problem, or longer, as long as — yes— remained the answer.
— Great. I'll leave in fifteen minutes to pick you up, Iruka—sensei. — Kakashi hung up the phone and stared at himself in the mirror. He would get ready in five minutes and use the other ten to drive calmly to Iruka's building. He had memorized the teacher's address even though he had only been there once. It also seemed absurdly certain, something that had naturally settled in Kakashi's memory.
It seemed as if there was a magnet of destiny attracting and keeping Kakashi close to Iruka — and he was no longer willing to disobey that movement.
The alpha left his phone with the screen locked on the sink counter and walked calmly to the closet, the towel almost falling off his hips. He had to hold it with one hand while opening the pressure cabinet with the other — the doors opened with just one touch — and it didn't take him long to choose his outfit for the evening: a gray turtleneck shirt, fitted to his body, made of a thin fabric that outlined his broad shoulders and the subtle contours of the muscles beneath the surface. Over it, he wore a straight—cut black jacket made of heavy fabric. He rolled up the sleeves of the jacket to reveal the cuffs of the gray blouse underneath. He had also chosen straight—cut pants that complemented the length of Kakashi's well—defined legs — they were made of a more comfortable, dark blue denim fabric, which unfortunately did not outline his muscles as well as the blouse did with his toned torso. But it left room for the imagination. On his feet, more casual shoes — Kakashi wanted to wear something different that night. He hadn't thought too much about his outfit, and he had no idea how much his appearance affected Iruka.
He really did get ready in five minutes.
He just needed to fix his hair, which was already drying naturally. He sprayed on a woody but discreet cologne. He didn't like very strong scents, with the exception of coffee.
The next ten minutes were spent getting into the car and arriving at Iruka's address in record time, while still respecting traffic laws and regulations, as he was an exemplary police officer. He had, of course, said goodbye to Sakura before leaving. It was Saturday night, and it seemed strange for a teenager to want to stay home when her father was going out, but Sakura was putting the finishing touches on her science fair project with her friends. The event would officially begin on Wednesday at school, under the supervision of Iruka—sensei. It had to be that way — not that Kakashi minded. So, even though she was at home, Sakura was not alone: Naruto, Hinata, and Ino were at his house when he left them, under Pakkun's strict supervision.
Kakashi always left Sakura in the company of an adult, such as Anko or sometimes her father, Sakumo. However, when Sakura notified him of her friends' arrival, she asked Kakashi to leave them alone if he was going out. Kakashi hadn't counted on calling Iruka to go out at the last minute. Now he would have to leave them alone because of that, but he wasn't as apprehensive as he thought he would be. The invitation to the teacher had come so naturally. He had barely thought before calling Iruka. And Sakura was no longer a child. After all, they were already sixteen and didn't need babysitters. Despite his heavy heart, the alpha needed to trust his daughter. If he hadn't been going out, he would have stayed in his room or office so as not to disturb the young people.
— You look handsome, Kakashi—san! — Naruto teased when the older alpha passed through the room. Sakura rolled her eyes.
— Don't encourage him... — But then she rested her gaze on her father and raised an eyebrow. — Are you going on a date? — A repulsive expression took over her daughter. She was acting this way because she was in front of her friends.
— Is there a problem? — Kakashi replied as he grabbed his car keys. — Can't I have a love life?
— Of course you can... But this was sudden. — Sakura crossed her arms and Kakashi shrugged.
— Wish me luck. Have a good project. — He approached her and kissed the top of her head, waving to the others before leaving.
Now, in the car, already parked in front of Iruka's small building, Kakashi took out his cell phone and sent a message to the teacher:
[Kakashi] [7:40 p.m.]: I'm here.
It took less than a minute for Iruka to come down. Kakashi had rolled down the window to see better, and he had a privileged view of the teacher as soon as he appeared in his field of vision. Just as the alpha had wanted to try something different with his clothes, Iruka looked different: a light cream—colored knit sweater, loose around the shoulders and sleeves, and slightly transparent when touched by the light from the sidewalk, enough to subtly outline the shape of his body without revealing too much. The collar was V—shaped, discreet, and revealed the top of his tanned collarbone. On his legs, dark wash jeans, no rips, tight enough to fit his long legs, but comfortable. On his feet, a pair of brown boots, made of soft leather and short in height, which he rarely wore, but liked. They were different from his usual sneakers, Kakashi noticed automatically. He walked calmly to the car, exuding a typical lightness.
Kakashi's heart had raced inside his chest — it wasn't fair that he was so handsome so easily.
Iruka approached the car and opened the door, but froze a little when his eyes met Kakashi sitting in the driver's seat. The alpha frowned slightly, smelling the scent he exuded: the scent of lemongrass and very light pheromones. He had probably taken a suppressant that worked.
— Iruka—sensei? — He called his name, blinking his eyes in his direction.
— Sorry, I... I got distracted. — He closed the door and turned to Kakashi. —Good evening, Kakashi—san. — The alpha smiled at him as he watched him put on his seatbelt. Now he could see the details of his face up close, the interior light of the car illuminating his tanned skin. His hair was loose, matching his youthful and cheerful face. He seemed willing, so to speak.
— Good evening, Iruka—sensei. You look rested.
Iruka smiled awkwardly again, shrugging his shoulders slightly. The alpha was able to perceive some of the omega's gestures, even if they were very subtle. It was as if he was already getting to know the small details about him in an imperceptible way, at a pace that only the two of them could understand — in fact, not even they were capable of understanding.
— Ah... And you look... — Kakashi continued smiling, because he knew he wasn't as rested as Iruka. He hadn't slept a wink the night before, because his body wouldn't let him. His body, let alone his mind, with images of Iruka in various scenarios...
Kakashi stared straight ahead, looking away so that Iruka wouldn't see him blush. The heat rose to his face. The teacher would think he was a complete pervert if he knew the truth.
— You look fine. — Iruka finally said, which elicited a soft laugh from Kakashi, lightening his mood. The alpha hoped that this was the aura that the omega perceived, even though there was tension resulting from both the fantasies of the previous night and his genuine concern for what had happened to Iruka the day before as well. The omega seemed fine now, but they still needed to clear up that story, like adults. He wasn't upset or angry that Iruka had omitted that, he just wanted to understand the omega.
Or rather, Kakashi wanted to get to know him. Not as Sakura's father. He didn't want them to be just father and teacher...
...He wanted to get to know Iruka. Completely.
Kakashi started driving, focused on the streets ahead of them. Soft music filled the air, from some station he had put on before leaving home.
— Where are we going? — Iruka broke the silence, staring at Kakashi.
— An udon restaurant I like. It's not far, and it's not usually crowded. — The alpha replied, looking at him out of the corner of his dark eyes, aware that Iruka was staring at him. He had chosen that restaurant the moment he had the idea of asking him out: from what little he knew of the teacher, he knew he would like the place.
— Udon? You made the right choice. — Iruka's impressed tone made Kakashi feel a satisfaction that was felt mainly in his chest.
— I listen to what you say, you know. I know you like noodles. — He wanted to make it clear to Iruka that nothing he said went unnoticed by the alpha. He was always attentive.
He had been to that restaurant several times before. Once with Sakura. Another time with Tenzo. A few times with Asuma. He was considered a frequent customer and was well known even among the owners. Even though he had been there with company, most of his visits to the restaurant had been alone. The food at that place was a refuge for Kakashi's constantly anguished mind, it was a place of pure comfort. He would like to share this with Iruka.
The alpha remained a few steps behind the omega, respectfully close. He put his hands in his pockets after opening and holding the door for Iruka, who was carefully observing the details of the restaurant with his bright brown eyes. Kakashi, familiar with the environment, observed Iruka and his details. The way the teacher betrayed a slight anxiety mixed with tension in all his cute and awkward mannerisms. The way his eyes, despite being curious about the new environment, always sought Kakashi, as if the older alpha were a figure of security for him. Kakashi wanted to be.
The alpha chose a table farther away from the kitchen and close to a window that overlooked the quiet night in Tokyo on that side of the city. Despite being a big city, it still had places like that, which offered a certain calmness. The two sat in silence between them — only the sounds around them filled their minds—and Kakashi noticed the tension increasing around Iruka, especially later, when the waiter brought the menus. The silver—haired man, despite having already opened the menu, already knew what he would choose. It would be the usual: Udon Kitsune. He appreciated the simplicity and tradition of that combination, with the hot, light broth that enveloped the thick noodles, topped with a generous slice of aburaage, sweet fried tofu. He even knew how to replicate the recipe at home.
Kakashi knew that Iruka felt he was being watched. The omega shrank back, and Kakashi, despite being slightly amused by the effect, looked away. Kakashi felt that, at some point, the teacher would put into words the reason for all that tension.
The moment came in the next second.
— I've been unlocked. — Iruka announced suddenly, without taking his eyes off the menu. Kakashi had looked back at him, now with wide eyes, unable to immediately interpret what exactly those words, that sentence meant. — As you may have noticed, I am an omega. I lied about being a beta, I'm sorry.
— Excuse me? Unlocked? — The alpha frowned, still processing the information that had been dumped on him. He knew, in fact, that Iruka was an omega. But he didn't want the teacher to apologize for it.
He continued to observe the omega, especially after their eyes met. Although he looked rested, that eye contact revealed to Kakashi a weary frustration in Iruka's eyes. He collapsed into his chair, once again breaking eye contact between the two, and ran his delicate hands over his face.
— Unlocked. That was Tsunade's word. — Kakashi didn't know who she was, and that would have been his next question if Iruka hadn't anticipated it. — She's my doctor... for pheromones. — The alpha was still looking at Iruka when he stared at the ceiling, his gaze lost. — You're a kind of key, apparently. A biological key... for me.
A kind of key. The words reverberated through Kakashi's mind. He didn't know if he agreed with that choice of words, especially since Iruka had also unlocked something in him.
— I realized you had pheromones a while ago. Don't apologize to me, Iruka, I just want to understand you and help you... So, explain it to me from the beginning. What exactly are we talking about? — Kakashi composed himself before earnestly asking for a full explanation. In fact, he felt he deserved that explanation; and he wasn't wrong about that.
Kakashi had already closed the menu when Iruka settled into his chair, his arms resting on the table, and looked back at him before beginning his explanation.
— I was a recessive omega. Like... An omega with a disconnected body. I never went into heat, never emitted pheromones. I always lived as a beta. Until you showed up. And... Something in me activated. From the first encounter, back at school.
The alpha nodded slowly, remaining silent. He had felt it, he remembered that moment clearly... And all the others that followed. He kept his gaze attentive and focused on Iruka, as if he wanted to convey to the omega that nothing else mattered to him but that conversation — because that was exactly how he was feeling at that moment.
— According to Tsunade, this is rare. Like, three documented clinical cases in the entire country. And... In all of them, what caused the change was the presence of an extremely biologically compatible alpha. — A pause for Iruka to take a deep breath. —Which, in my case, is you.
Kakashi crossed his arms now, still nodding, still processing. Something instinctive inside him had been ignited. Just because of Kakashi, Iruka's biological nature had been... ignited. That definitely affected him. It wasn't basic information.
— And what exactly does ‘extremely biologically compatible’ mean? — He asked, raising his eyebrow again, because he wanted to know more about it. He wanted to hear it from Iruka's mouth.
— That my body basically freaked out when it sensed you. My entire system started to react... as if it had been waiting twenty—six years just for you to show up...
— And my body responded back. Something it hadn't done in ten years, since my old partner. — Kakashi added, and with the tension returning to the teacher's face, he smiled briefly and sadly in an attempt to calm him down. He also shrugged. — I know you and Kurenai are friends, so you must know some things. It's okay, Iruka—sensei.
The two held eye contact, enveloped in a respectful and comfortable silence. Kakashi knew that Iruka wouldn't ask yet, and he was mentally grateful for that space, for that respect, for that empathy that the omega exuded. Iruka just nodded.
— Tsunade thinks your grief caused a feral inhibition. That your body shut down the emission as a way to protect itself. But for some reason, now... you're emitting again. With me. She wants your blood, too. For tests and analysis! It's obvious.
Kakashi raised his eyebrows, surprised by the unusual request from Iruka's doctor. Tsunade seemed to be in luck, because Kakashi was very willing to cooperate.
— This escalated quickly. — he joked, trying to lighten the mood a little. Iruka didn't pick up on the mood and sighed, resting his chin on his hands as he spoke again.
— I know. I just... I didn't want to involve you in this. Really. I'm taking new inhibitors, I'm having tests done. I just wanted to let you know that... My body may be trying to form a bond. Biological. Without my permission.
There was a long silence; another long silence. Kakashi's heart tightened in his chest, as if an invisible hand were wrapping around it at that moment in response to what Iruka was saying. He didn't want the teacher to feel guilty about what was happening; and at the same time, something more primal and fierce ignited inside Kakashi.
A biological bond.
Kakashi's body was there at that very moment.
Not just his body, his mind too.
He consciously wanted to have something more with Iruka — he just was terrible at expressing it.
— Without my permission. — Iruka didn't want to pursue this, then? Kakashi was not willing to accept that. Above all, he wanted to understand this too.
— It's okay, Iruka. I told you that you didn't have to be strong alone. And that explains a lot about what I've been feeling. I want to do this follow—up, this treatment, because, as I already told you, I want to understand. And really help. — He hoped those words would get the message across.
But before he could say anything about it, the bowls of udon were served. Kakashi had ordered the same as always, while Iruka had opted for Udon Tempura with vegetables. The dish came with a light broth, soft noodles, and, on the side, the colorful crunchiness of pumpkin, eggplant, carrot, and green bean tempura.
The tension emanating from the teacher seemed to dissipate with the hot steam rising from their plates. They talked about books, schools, teenagers, movies, literature... They even enjoyed moments of even more relaxed laughter. Kakashi didn't want that night to end, he wanted to live in that moment — unfortunately, it was impossible. The alpha could, however, hope that it would happen again.
After they paid — once again, Kakashi insisted on paying the entire bill himself, despite Iruka's complaints. The teacher would not forget that, he still felt he owed him for the previous day's snack — the two headed out of the restaurant, embraced by the colder air now that it was later. They stuck their hands in their pockets, standing a few meters from the restaurant, not moving toward the car. It was as if neither of them wanted the night to end.
— Thank you for not seeing me as a problem. — Iruka broke the silence. Kakashi looked away from the sky to the omega, who was staring at the ground. His face was flushed from the cold, with all the concentration of the blush mainly on his upturned nose. He felt like cupping his face in his hands, but he forced them to stay in his pockets. Iruka didn't look at Kakashi yet, but the alpha's face was also lit up, a pale glow, as if he were the moon. And Iruka would be the sun.
— I would never do that. — His words came out so easily that Iruka finally looked at him. The teacher's face lit up as he smiled at Kakashi, that smile capable of disarming anyone. The alpha felt his heart skip a beat, as if he were a teenager... Once again, Iruka awakened that kind of feeling in him. The teacher, in turn, felt the urge to approach the police officer and feel his warmth against him even more. He already felt gently embraced by the pheromones he released in a subtle stream, as if he didn't even notice. — Iruka... — His name came without Kakashi thinking. Iruka shivered, and not because of the cold.
—Yes...? — He had barely finished speaking when the alpha embraced him. His hands, which had been in his pockets a second earlier, had slipped out to wrap around the shorter man's slim waist. Their bodies pressed delicately together, fitting perfectly, as if the two had been made from complementary molds. Iruka felt the heat of the rigid, firm body, clearly outlined by Kakashi's gray shirt. He himself felt hot; he was barely aware that his body also emanated a delicious warmth for the alpha. The scents of his pheromones combined there in that space between their bodies and were not limited to that, spreading around throughout the night.
Iruka felt welcomed, as if he belonged in that embrace. He was aware of his body, but not in a tense way. He wouldn't lose control there. He felt calmer and more stable than ever. He felt Kakashi's nose sink into the top of his head, and his heart skipped a beat with that closeness. The two could merge into one in that embrace. Anyone passing by would be sure that they were a long—time couple very much in love. That thought made Iruka smile involuntarily, even with a hint of sadness, because that was not the reality.
Not yet.
Iruka's thoughts shut off as soon as he allowed himself to return the embrace. He leaned his cheek against Kakashi's firm chest and could hear the powerful heart inside, beating at a fast but steady pace. He closed his eyes, his arms now around Kakashi's tall, slender figure, which hid an absurd amount of well—defined muscles.
The omega missed feeling so welcomed. The feeling of belonging made him absurdly sensitive.
The two stayed hugging for a few minutes, just enjoying the comfort of each other's bodies. Anyone who saw Kakashi from behind would not be able to see Iruka. His figure completely engulfed the teacher, as if he could protect him from anything. And he could and wanted to. More than anything else.
A sharp, cold wind blew through their bodies. Even pressed against Kakashi, Iruka's body shivered all over. Kakashi smiled slightly and moved away, still with his arms around the shorter man's waist. He moved far enough away so that they could face each other. The teacher's face was still red from the cold, and Kakashi didn't even realize that his own face was the same. The two exchanged smiles, as if they were a couple of teenagers going on a date for the first time.
The feeling was practically the same.
—I'll take you home. — Kakashi whispered, and Iruka, even though he didn't want it to end, nodded.
— Thank you. — he whispered back. The two were still staring at each other, and Iruka had gathered his hands on Kakashi's chest, as if to warm them. If it were a movie, it would be the perfect moment for a kiss. The first kiss. Kakashi could feel the urge to slowly lean toward the teacher, and their mouths would stick together in an explosion of heat and inhibited feelings, but...
...But Iruka's cell phone started ringing wildly.
Embarrassed, the teacher took a step back, forcing Kakashi to let go of him and put his hands back in his pockets. He couldn't face the alpha as he took the phone out of his pocket and turned off the alarm titled —Chibi's Medicine.— It was an alarm he should have turned off months ago, as Chibi had had to take antibiotics for a few weeks in the past, but that had been more than four months ago.
Damn Iruka.
When he looked at Kakashi again, the alpha was laughing softly, holding himself back. Iruka always found him impossibly beautiful, but at that moment, clearly relaxed and looking so light... The alpha was like a Greek god. There was an aura of bright silver light around him that, in addition to attracting Iruka, made Kakashi even more spectacular.
Iruka wanted to capture that image.
—Don't laugh! — he teased, smiling too. — What do you have against upbeat, fun songs as an alarm for Chibi's medicine?
The next moment, Iruka's cell phone rang again, this time with a high—pitched, eccentric sound, full of electronic beats and colorful voices singing: — Pon pon pon pon pon... — It was the song —Pon Pon Pon— by Kyary Pamyu Pamyu, lively and a little crazy, which sounded completely out of place on that cold and quiet night.
Kakashi restrained himself from bursting out laughing, while Iruka, red—faced, hurried to turn off the ringtone.
— I guess Chibi still rules your life, huh? — Kakashi commented with a mischievous smile.
Iruka snorted, but couldn't hide his smile. The two took advantage of that cue to walk to the car, now side by side in a decidedly more relaxed and lighthearted mood. Kakashi put on a playlist of songs similar to the alarm to tease the teacher, who ignored him along the way with an amused smirk. When they arrived in front of Iruka's building, the omega sighed, not wanting to get out of the car.
Still, he unbuckled his seatbelt.
—Thank you very much, Kakashi—san. — he said, turning to the alpha. — I... I'm going to clean up my mess. Let's stabilize this. I am immensely grateful for your help with everything.
—Don't thank me. — Kakashi replied, smiling sideways. — You're not a mess. I also have something to stabilize in this process, Iruka—sensei. Have a good night... — I ruka already had his hand on the doorknob. — And when I text you, don't take too long to reply. Please.
Those words destabilized Iruka at once. The teacher squeezed the doorknob, completely blushing from his forehead to his exposed neck.
— I—I won't... — He even stuttered, filling Kakashi's heart with tenderness. — I promise.
— Thank you. — Kakashi said, relieved to feel the teacher's firmness in his words. But Iruka still hadn't moved to leave, except for his hand on the door handle...
Then, in a thoughtless gesture, he leaned toward the silver—haired man and kissed him softly on the cheek, dangerously close to his mouth. The sound of the kiss against Kakashi's soft skin filled the interior of the car. He didn't look at Kakashi as he pulled away and said:
— Have a good night too, Kakashi—san. — And he got out of the car, disappearing into the building, leaving the alpha paralyzed and wide—eyed.
Kakashi didn't sleep that night either. His mind was flooded with fantasies about Iruka; all because of that simple, provocative kiss...
{...}
On Monday, Iruka was still thinking about that little kiss on the cheek. Kakashi hadn't sent any messages on Sunday — and neither had Iruka tried to contact him. He hadn't had time, actually. He had spent Sunday holed up in his room with Chibi curled up at his feet, catching up on the thousand and one tasks related to his doctorate. He had completely ignored his cell phone, but he had checked it to see if there were any notifications from Kakashi: none. Maybe it had been too impulsive and now the alpha didn't even want to know him or help him anymore...
Iruka felt like he had ruined everything with a little kiss on the cheek, because he was ridiculous!
Between classes and the final preparations for the science fair, which would begin that Monday, he had still managed to find time to listen to his own crazy thoughts. His own thoughts seemed to be more against him than in his favor. He could hear himself saying how pathetic he had been for kissing Kakashi on the cheek, as if they were children...
— Iruka—sensei? — Naruto's voice filled his mind, taking the place of his paranoia. Thankfully.
Iruka was now in Naruto and Sakura's classroom. He had given the students a series of exercises to copy and solve in groups of three or four, talking quietly — whether about the subject or other things, Iruka couldn't say, but at least the classroom was organized. He was adjusting a grade sheet on his notebook when Naruto spoke to him. The blond had been in the bathroom and had returned with a little note for Iruka; the teacher knew this because the paper was folded and had “Iruka—sensei” written on it in handwriting he didn't recognize.
— They left this note for you in the office... As I was passing by, Principal Hiruzen asked me to give it to you when I returned to the classroom.
— Oh, yes. Thank you very much, Naruto. — Iruka leaned back in his chair and smiled kindly at the student. The young alpha smiled back and went to sit in his seat, in a quartet of chairs next to Sakura and in front of Ino and Shikamaru.
— What was that you gave the sensei? — Sakura whispered, the first to ask, already showing curiosity. Naruto let out a mischievous chuckle.
— A little note for the sensei... — He leaned in, lowering his voice even more. —I read it. It's from his boyfriend or girlfriend! — Everyone's eyes widened.
— But it makes sense! Iruka—sensei is handsome and kind... — Ino was the first to accept the idea, and everyone else nodded.
— That's true. Of course he has a girlfriend, he's an adult... — Shikamaru interjected, whispering. — What did it say, Naruto?
— Something about him or her leaving mochi for Iruka—sensei to eat! It's just like him to like sweets like mochi. — Naruto could barely contain his laughter.
“I left the mochi in the teachers' parking lot. Hiruzen has the key, as well as this note. I promise he won't read it. I thought about you all day yesterday... We have to repeat Saturday's date. But I'm warning you, next time, I might not let the almost—kiss slide.”
— My God! A note about a kiss? Isn't Iruka—sensei's girlfriend afraid he'll get fired? — Sakura wrinkled her nose.
— Or boyfriend. — Naruto shrugged. — I thought it was romantic. They're going out again.
— Sometimes they're still just getting to know each other... — Shikamaru reasoned. —I don't know if I trust Naruto's interpretation. A note about mochi? A kiss? It seems kind of pointless to do that...
— Are you calling me stupid?— Naruto let out a “tsk.”
— It's not pointless. It's romantic. But you wouldn't understand... — Ino rolled her eyes.
— What is Iruka—sensei's girlfriend like? — Sakura asked, and the subject definitely caught the attention of her classmates.
— Definitely someone beautiful. — Ino didn't even hesitate.
— Of course, of course. — Sakura nodded. — Iruka—sensei is kind. The person must be kind too... Could it be someone from school?
— Ugh, imagine dating someone from your workplace. — Shikamaru grimaced and received disapproving looks from all sides. — Oh, come on. Don't you think people should have private spaces in their lives...?
— I don't see much of a problem with that. — Naruto shrugged. — Iruka—sensei must be dating someone really cool. I'd like to date someone who makes mochi and leaves them at work for me...
— That's because you think with your stomach. — Ino teased, which elicited low giggles from everyone.
— Guys, focus! What if it's that new teacher, Gai—sensei? — Sakura asked.
— Sakura, if it were someone from school, why would they leave a note? Wouldn't it be easier... I don't know... to talk to Iruka—sensei in the hallway? — Shikamaru frowned.
— It's all about romance, Shikamaru. But I don't know, Saku—chan. Iruka doesn't match Gai...
— I'm going to make a list. Something inside my heart tells me it's someone from school... Or close to it... — The girl declared, and then went back to focusing on science questions, even though her mind was already hyper—focused on that particular subject...
Meanwhile, Iruka had read and reread the note probably a hundred times.
Or even more.
And he was frozen in his chair.
“I left Mochi in the teachers' parking lot. Hiruzen has the key, as well as this note. I promise he won't read this note. I thought about you all day yesterday... We have to repeat Saturday's date. But I warn you, next time, I may not let the almost—kiss pass.”
It was a note from Kakashi. Less than five lines written in that clean, organized handwriting, which, come to think of it, suited Kakashi, but which contained a huge amount of information: Mochi was in the parking lot. Kakashi had thought about him. Kakashi wanted to see him again.
Kakashi wanted to kiss him.
Iruka was feeling paranoid even with the words literally written in front of him.
For a second, he thought it might even be a prank by Naruto, but it would be too elaborate for Uzumaki (with all due respect). There was no way any of the students — except Sakura — could have known that information. And even Sakura didn't know, because otherwise she would have mentioned it. Kakashi hadn't yet shared the progress of his relationship with Iruka with his daughter; that didn't bother the teacher. He wanted to keep things between them for now.
Whatever they had; Iruka still didn't have a term for it.
Lost in the notion of time, Iruka had barely noticed that it was the last minute of class — and that it was the last class of the morning. The bell rang the next moment, and all the students waited for his permission to tidy up the classroom and finally leave. He nodded at everyone, folded the piece of paper, and began to put away all his materials. As soon as the last student left, he did the same and locked the classroom door with the keys he would leave at the office. He took the key from the principal's desk, who had already left for lunch, and found Kurenai so they could have lunch together.
They would have to stay at school for a few hours in the afternoon because, as it was science fair week, they needed to align points between the faculty, coordination, and administration. In addition, that meeting was also to introduce the external members of the fair project. The school always invited students or university professors from various universities across the country to evaluate the projects or conduct workshops, which provided great opportunities for the school's students.
However, as soon as he entered the room, it was as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over Iruka. Why? Because of the person who was in the teachers' room when he entered.
Mizuki was there. That was why he was in Tokyo. He was one of the guests invited by the school to join the incredible project organized and led by Iruka. Unfortunately, he wasn't the one who chose the guests, because he had already taken on too many tasks.
He regretted not taking on that task as well, even if it meant burning out.
At least he wouldn't have to look at Mizuki's face now.
But it was too late.
The last time he had seen Mizuki was almost two years ago. It was longer than their relationship had lasted — the two had dated for a year, when Iruka had just started his doctorate. Mizuki was one of Professor Orochimaru's doctoral students, and he was only a few months away from defending his thesis when they started dating. But it had been traumatic for Iruka, to say the least. Mizuki was a typical alpha, with long silver hair — it seems our dear Iruka—sensei has a type —, tall and reasonably muscular. Even though some time had passed, he hadn't changed much. He was a little more tanned, as if he had recently spent a season or a few days at the beach. But he was still the same as always.
Iruka, on the other hand, knew he had changed in many ways.
Mizuki's expression did not hide this.
He smiled kindly, or something like that, when Iruka entered the room. The omega had been deliberately ignoring his messages. He had read them in the notification bar, but had no intention of replying. On the contrary, he was about to archive the unwanted conversation...
...But now he would be forced to deal with Mizuki.
How lucky!
Iruka sat down at the rectangular table, opposite the alpha, between Kurenai and Gai. He ignored the silver—haired man's constant gaze, as if it were a nuisance. And it was.
— Good afternoon, everyone. — Hiruzen's voice filled the room as soon as the director entered. He walked to the end of the table, where he could be seen by everyone present. — As you already know, we are gathered here today to finalize the details of the science fair that will begin on Wednesday. Everything is already well underway, but this weekend, our guest researcher arrived in Tokyo, and I would like to take this opportunity to introduce him. Mizuki—san. — Hiruzen nodded to the alpha, who took the cue to stand up, aware of everyone's attention.
Some things would never change: Mizuki loved attention.
The alpha slid his chair back with a slight creak as he stood up. His light eyes scanned the group of teachers, resting for a moment more attentively on Iruka. Kurenai noticed this — of course she knew who he was.
— It's a pleasure to be here. — he began in a calm but confident voice. — I am a researcher at Osaka University and have been invited to collaborate on this biology project. I believe that with the techniques and experience I bring, we can raise the level of the fair and provide students with more direct contact with cutting—edge scientific research. — He smiled with a touch of discreet arrogance, leaving the impression that his presence was not just a help, but a paradigm shift for the project. As if he were the school's savior. — I am counting on everyone's collaboration, especially Iruka—sensei, who knows the school like no one else, as the principal has already told me, and who will be able to facilitate our integration.
Some teachers exchanged glances, noticing the subtle tension that seemed to be forming between Mizuki and Iruka, while Iruka himself looked away, trying to maintain a professional demeanor despite his discomfort. Mizuki enjoyed that little unspoken provocation, flashing an almost imperceptible smile. That fierce, feline smile reminded Iruka of an unwanted past.
Apart from that complicated part, the rest of the meeting went perfectly well. The science fair was a well—established project at the school that mobilized the entire team, fortunately. Iruka felt pride growing in his chest, especially as one of the leaders of the event and one of the first organizers.
He was leaving the room, exchanging pleasantries with Kurenai and Gai, when Hiruzen called him, asking the teacher to stay. He said goodbye to the other teachers and turned to the principal.
— Yes, principal? — He politely made himself available.
— Iruka-sensei, Mizuki-san told me that you two are old research colleagues... I'd like you to do me a favor and introduce him to the school, okay? Thank you very much. — The principal didn't even give Iruka time to reply, just left him standing there. It was at that moment that the omega realized that Mizuki was sitting down and got up as the teacher left. He walked over to Iruka and put his hands unassumingly in his pockets, looking at the brunette with a little smile.
— Long time, Iruka. — His voice sounded soft. For a moment, Iruka could almost believe the tenor of his message: that he was sorry.
— Yes. — Iruka blinked, pulling himself together. — Let's get this over with.
— As you wish... — Mizuki sighed and Iruka turned away from him, walking through the school corridors expecting to be followed.
As he introduced the school to his former partner and now collaborating researcher at the school, Iruka inevitably thought about how having dated Mizuki seemed so out of place with who he was. The two didn't fit together. Their personalities clashed absurdly — Mizuki always thought he was better than everyone else, while Iruka always thought everyone else was better than himself. Mizuki overflowed with an almost unhealthy ambition, while Iruka was happy in absolute simplicity.
That's why they broke up.
Iruka had never been enough for Mizuki, being a defective omega, and Mizuki was one of the only people who knew Iruka's true nature in the past.
Even in their style of dress, the two were polar opposites: Iruka wore a white polo shirt with a light gray sweater over it. He wore straight-cut, dark blue twill pants and his usual Vans on his feet. His hair was loose, falling softly over his forehead and framing the teacher's face. Mizuki wore a dark burgundy long-sleeved dress shirt with an open collar and sleeves rolled up to his forearms, showing off a modern wristwatch, with a black jacket over it, fitted to his body. His pants were dark, tight jeans, and his shoes were black boots. He exuded exaggerated confidence.
He was so immersed in his thoughts and presenting the school in such an automatic way that he hardly noticed they were being watched from afar: Naruto, Sakura, Ino, and Shikamaru — the same four as before — were hiding behind a hallway.
— That must be his boyfriend! — Naruto said, receiving a slap on the back of the head from Ino.
— Keep your voice down, idiot. — she scolded him, and the blond grumbled, rubbing the back of his head in pain. —I don't know. They don't seem to go together...
— But look how close they are to each other. That man seems to have trouble controlling himself around Iruka-sensei... — Shikamaru pointed out.
— He acts like a predator. — Sakura grimaced. — I don't like that...
— Not to mention those clothes. How awful. — Ino assessed the alpha from head to toe with her light eyes. This elicited giggles from Sakura.
— It must be him, guys. Accept that I won. — Naruto shrugged. — He shows up on the same day as the note? That's ‘contestable evidence,’ as Shikamaru likes to say.
—Uncontestable evidence, Naruto.
—Ah, whatever.
— I still need to investigate this, but I'll definitely find out. — Sakura promised, narrowing her green eyes as the two men climbed the stairs to continue the school presentation and disappeared from the students' view.
{...}
The school tour lasted less than forty minutes. Iruka sped up as much as he could because he couldn't stand being around Mizuki for too long. Not when he rekindled all those memories that the omega wanted so badly to forget, or rather, leave buried deep in his mind.
When they were in front of the school, near the parking lot, Mizuki still insisted on talking:
— You know, Iruka, about the messages...
— I'm very busy right now, Mizuki. We'll talk another time. Bye. — And he headed for his car, where he settled in. He sighed heavily and hugged the steering wheel. — I miss you, Mochi... — You can't even imagine what happened today. — He sighed again, breathing freely now that he was away from the alpha. He realized that, in addition to the repairs, Mochi had undergone a complete cleaning.
He didn't even know how to thank Kakashi, but he knew he had to act.
So he picked up his phone, already feeling his heart almost leap out of his mouth as he began typing the message to the alpha:
Thank you so much for everything, Kakashi. Seriously. I don't even know how to repay you... Maybe with another date? Since you made it clear that you want to, I share that desire. And about the almost-kiss... Well, we'll see.
He sent it. He had been feeling brave the last few days, so what harm could it do?
He typed again:
Sorry to bring this up too, but we need to schedule the joint appointment with Tsunade. When are you available?
Kakashi's message was automatic. Iruka still had his conversation open on the screen when the message popped up:
[Kakashi] [15:40]: Great.
[Kakashi] [15:41]: I was anxious for you to read the note, I must confess.
[Kakashi] [15:41]: Honestly, I'm free now. Does your doctor have an appointment today?
And yes, Tsunade had an appointment available at 5 p.m.
Iruka sent him the location of the clinic where she worked and instructed him to have his blood tests done at the clinic's hospital. He could also leave the tests there, as they would analyze them quickly. So, less than half an hour after sending the message, Iruka was in the clinic's reception room, waiting for Kakashi to show up...
...And, right on time at 16h30, he appeared, walking through the clinic door with the calmness of someone who had no idea of the effect he was having.
He wore an open black bomber jacket, revealing underneath a high-necked shirt — typical of him — in a dark burgundy color. He exuded a decidedly mature air and... Seductive, to Iruka, who was holding himself back from drooling right there. The fabric discreetly outlined his chest and neck. The pants were slim-fit beige cargo pants, made of comfortable fabric and full of side pockets, which gave the look a practical air, but far from sloppy. On his feet, he wore dark sports sneakers, too expensive for someone who didn't care about fashion, but matching the rest of the outfit perfectly. He wore a black mask on his face because he had been in a hospital moments ago. It didn't take him long to find Iruka sitting there, his hand raised in a kind of half-wave.
He smiled, a gesture that was evident from the movement of his eyes.
Under one arm, he carried a folder with papers. It was the test results, which were also sent to Dr. Tsunade online. But Kakashi was a vintage guy.
— Hi, Kakashi-san. — Iruka swallowed hard as he approached, forcing himself to keep his eyes on his face.
— Hi, Iruka-sensei. — The silver-haired man sat down next to him, politely dismissing Iruka's need to stand up. — How are you?
— Fine. Very well. — He blinked, forcing himself to maintain eye contact. — And you?
— I'm definitely better now. Is Mochi working well?
Iruka took a second to remember.
— Oh, of course! She's perfect. She's never been so clean either, I need to pay you for everything, and I still will—
Before Kakashi could protest, they were called into Tsunade's office, almost thirty minutes early. Tsunade had those moments sometimes.
— Shall we go? — The alpha stood up, and Iruka nodded, taking the lead to the doctor's office.
The doctor was sitting at her desk, a gentle smile on her sculpted face.
— What a pleasant surprise to have you here today. — she announced when the two entered, standing up and extending her hand to greet Kakashi. — Senju Tsunade. It's a great pleasure to finally meet you.
Kakashi raised an eyebrow at her use of the adverb —finally—. He took her hand, and the doctor's grip was absurdly strong.
— Hatake Kakashi. The pleasure is all mine.
— Please, dear ones, have a seat. — The three sat down, and she turned her light eyes to Iruka. — You've been well since Saturday, haven't you? I'm very happy to see you often, you know that.
— Thank you, Tsunade. I'm stable, apparently. The medication has been working very well since the last... accident. — She nodded as Iruka tried not to drown in embarrassment.
Kakashi just watched them.
—Right. — She opened a specific document on the computer with the results of Kakashi's blood test. — Iruka-kun must have already explained in part what is happening, right?
— Yes, ma'am.
— Now, I'm going to use technical terms, Mr. Hatake.
— Maa, just call me Kakashi. Please.
— All right, Kakashi. Don't call me ma'am, then.
— Okay, Tsunade. — She smiled contentedly.
— I like you already. — She picked up the MacBook and turned the screen so they could both see what the tests showed. — The tests indicate that you are clinically healthy, Kakashi. Which is a good starting point. Normal blood count, stable liver and kidney function, no acute inflammation. Hormone levels within the average range for an alpha of your age. — She slid her finger across the screen. — What interests us most here — she said — is the sensory receptor panel and the neurochemical response profile to pheromones.
Kakashi nodded with a slight frown, still not sure if he really understood.
— I imagine it's related to what we talked about on Saturday. Iruka told me about being unblocked... And my body reacted, since I've been sensing or emitting pheromones for ten years. But he can sense it. And I can sense him, I mean, he started emitting after he met me. Because we're each other's key?
Tsunade glanced briefly at Iruka, who looked away.
— Exactly. — She crossed her arms over her chest. — Your case is that your body has no significant physiological blocks. That means that, biologically, you can sense and react to pheromones. But your body seems to have gotten used to suppressing those reactions. — This can happen for a number of reasons: prolonged trauma, unresolved grief, chronic exposure to environmental blockers, or simply... unconscious choice. She paused briefly. — What's important here is: you're not damaged. Your body has just... adapted.
— So you mean this block... Is it reversible? — He asked, still frowning.
— In theory, yes. But each case is different. And I won't lie... Spontaneous reversals are rare. In fact, there are no documented cases.
Iruka tensed in his seat. He didn't comment.
— Sometimes the trigger is emotional. — Tsunade continued, now sounding almost as if she were reflecting. — Sometimes it's olfactory, sometimes it's hormonal. Sometimes it's someone.
— Someone? Like that thing with the key, then? — It was the alpha who asked.
She smiled with the corner of her mouth, as if talking about something she knew all too well. And she knew all too well.
— The chemistry between two individuals doesn't follow logic. Sometimes, the body responds even if the mind still resists. Pheromones are just the tip of the iceberg.
Iruka, visibly embarrassed, cleared his throat, as if to remind the two that he was still there.
— His tests indicate that there has been a recent response, right? — It was his first question of the consultation.
Tsunade nodded in response.
—Yes. The neurochemical response curve indicates that he reacted to a recent stimulus. There is a release of oxytocin, norepinephrine, and even traces of luteinizing hormone. This happened because of your... Your ‘almost heat,’ Iruka. Let's call it that.— Iruka wanted to disappear at that moment. The most he could do was sink into his chair, feeling the heavy stares on him. —What I recommend, Kakashi, is that you don't worry so much about understanding everything right now. Your body is reacting, and that may be a sign of recovery. It may be uncomfortable at first, but it's not a threat. On the contrary. And... Let's face it, feeling isn't a bad thing.
Kakashi agreed with her.
— No. It's not.
— Kakashi, — Tsunade resumed, more serious now — you two are going to need to think about something important in the long term. Iruka, you're going to need a partner for mating season, just like Kakashi.
Iruka swallowed hard, his face turning red, almost breathless. He wanted more than ever to disappear.
— I... — he began, hesitating, but stopped.
Kakashi cleared his throat, surprised at the frankness with which the doctor had made this last recommendation. The room around them seemed to get smaller.
Tsunade laughed softly, breaking the mood.
— I know it's a sensitive subject, but you need to take it seriously. Ideally, you should be each other's partners, but if that's not possible, find other reliable partners. The body is unforgiving; sooner or later, it will demand what it needs.
Iruka bit his lip, while Kakashi stared at Tsunade. The two would not look at each other now, not at that moment.
Partners to each other.
That's because Iruka didn't know what they were. Yet.
—What about me? — Kakashi asked, breaking the silence. — If I keep seeing Iruka this often, could it make his reaction worse?
— It could — Tsunade replied bluntly. — Constant exposure can intensify the symptoms, yes. So I recommend monitoring. But, as I said: it could. I believe your constant presence will stabilize him. Stabilize both of you.
— Rest too, as much as you love to work, slow down a little. — she added, looking at Iruka. — And no aggressive blockers. Only the ones I prescribed.
Iruka nodded, absorbing everything. He wished he could write it all down, but his hands were shaking. He was just absorbing, not really processing.
Tsunade then looked at the two of them, a curious gleam in her eyes.
— Have you had any closer contact? Hugs, prolonged touching?
They looked at each other, as if they didn't know exactly what to say.
— A hug or two... — Kakashi admitted, in a lower tone, but holding the blonde woman's gaze.
— Right. — said Tsunade with a sarcastic maternal smile. — You're probably at the beginning of chemical imprinting. It's not a sentence, but it's a sign that something is being born there.
— Chemical imprinting? — Iruka repeated, frowning. She hadn't mentioned it during their first consultation. It sounded like something bad.
— Chemical imprinting — she repeated, seeing their reaction — may sound like a scary term, but it's actually a natural process of the body.
The two remained silent, waiting for her to explain.
— It's the way the body recognizes and creates a special chemical bond between two people, especially between alpha and omega. It's the bond, but in a more... Irrational to understand — Tsunade explained calmly. — When the body releases certain pheromones and neurochemicals in response to the other, it's as if it were ‘imprinting’ that individual as a reference, a kind of preferred biological partner.
Iruka blinked, beginning to understand.
— It's as if your bodies have recognized each other on a deep level, even if your minds are still trying to process it. — She paused, looking at the two of them. — Imprinting is not a prison, nor is it a fatal destiny. But it is a strong indication that there is a real biological connection, and that this connection will influence physical, emotional, and even behavioral reactions. — The two absorbed the information in silence. — It can be scary at first — Tsunade continued — but it can also be the beginning of something very good. You two are taking the first steps toward reconnecting with this important part of yourselves.
Iruka let out a somewhat relieved sigh, while Kakashi relaxed his body a little.
— It's not as scary as it seemed, after all. — Kakashi said quietly, looking at Iruka.
— No. — Iruka agreed with a shy smile. He was even feeling less guilty now. He looked down at the floor, and Kakashi took a deep breath, feeling a slight uneasiness in his chest.
— I've seen cases like this before, — the doctor continued, adding — but not with such abrupt reactions. You two are special. Don't worry too much, just be aware. I'll be monitoring you and will always be available.
Kakashi glanced worriedly at Iruka and asked quietly,
— Is he handling all this well?
— Overall, yes. Tsunade replied. — But he'll need support. Both of you .— She winked at them and, as if sensing the tension in the air, joked — I'm not saying you have something... But if you do, it's none of my business, unless it affects your health. And honestly, I wouldn't mind seeing you two together, not at all.
Iruka let out an awkward chuckle, while Kakashi just smiled, not quite sure how to react. Tsunade sensed the mood and realized she had done her job for today with the two of them.
— That's all for today. — the doctor finally concluded and stood up, walking around the table to Iruka's side. — If you need anything, I'm here. Take care. You can call me anytime. — She hugged the omega as he got up and left the room with Kakashi, walking silently to the clinic exit.
— She's... intense. — the silver-haired man commented outside. The sun was beginning to set, the afternoon slowly being replaced by night.
— You get used to it. — Iruka gave a brief smile. — And she's good.
— I noticed that.
A comfortable silence stretched between them. Kakashi turned to Iruka.
— Are you hungry?
— A little. — He hesitated for a moment, but answered anyway.
— I know a place that sells rice balls with homemade soy sauce. It's close by. It's a street market.
— That was very specific. — Iruka chuckled.
— Shall we go? I feel like you'll like it, Iruka-sensei.
Iruka looked at him, surprised by the confidence with which Kakashi had said he would like it. The omega had no doubts, but he was definitely enchanted by Hatake from the first moment they saw each other. It had been a one-way street ever since, both emotionally and biologically.
— Let's go, then.
Although the two had driven to the clinic, the market was very close, so they could leave their vehicles parked and walk to the address. It was one of the street markets Obito liked to go to. It was a memory that had been painful for a long time, but Kakashi seemed to be learning the meaning of the word —reframing— at last, alongside Iruka. As they approached the place, they could smell the aromas and hear the sounds: distant laughter, the smell of hot food and spices mixed with the coolness of the falling night.
Faced with a cold wind that blew through them and made the teacher shiver noticeably from head to toe, Kakashi put his arm around Iruka's back, a subtle, almost imperceptible gesture, but one that warmed the omega's chest in an unexpected way. He liked feeling that way: welcomed. He wouldn't be warmed up right away, but the intention was worth more than anything else.
— I... I used to come here with my partner. — Kakashi commented, his voice low, sharing a memory he had kept to himself for a long time. — He loved flea markets.
Iruka didn't respond right away. He felt the depth of that moment, the old pain that still lived there, and the timid hope of a new beginning. Maybe with him.
— Then it's the perfect place to start building more memories. — he said, looking at Kakashi with a tender smile, feeling that, for the first time in a long time, he could let something new blossom. The alpha pulled the omega close, feeling his heart skip a beat.
The fair was quite busy, the yellowish lights of the stalls casting a warm glow on the people walking around. Kakashi and Iruka sat on a small wooden bench, a little away from the hustle and bustle. The aroma of freshly fried rice cakes still lingered in the air. They already had their packets in hand, ready to be enjoyed with the soy sauce sachets.
Kakashi slowly removed his mask with just one hand. Iruka took the opportunity to observe the face of the man in front of him: the delicate features, the fair skin marked by a slight shadow of fatigue, the slight shiver of silver hair falling over his forehead. His eyes revealed an almost painful depth, a mixture of strength and fragility—as paradoxical as it was, that was how Iruka saw Kakashi. At that moment, under the pale yellow light of the night market, he seemed like an unreal, ethereal being, something that did not belong in this world. Iruka felt his heart race, completely drawn to that beauty that should be considered a crime.
It was then that a voice familiar to Kakashi cut through the air.
Among all the tones and frequencies, he heard a voice almost identical to Obito's.
Kakashi froze, his eyes wide, his body tense.
His next movements were automatic. Almost involuntary.
He needed to check... Check if it wasn't Obito. Almost like a magnet, as if he desperately needed to find his deceased partner again. He stared at Iruka, his face pale and eyes wide as if he had just seen a ghost.
He had heard, in fact.
— Excuse me, Iruka-sensei. — he whispered, quickly getting up and walking toward the source of the voice. His feet automatically moved behind the source of that voice, so familiar to Kakashi even ten years later.
Ten years since he had heard Obito.
Iruka remained seated, his gaze following the alpha as he crossed the tables and benches. Kakashi finally stopped in front of two familiar faces: Uchiha Itachi, with his serious expression and piercing eyes, and Uchiha Mikoto, whose haughty posture and cold gaze overflowed with contempt.
The voice was not Obito's — it was Itachi's, of course. They were there to eat rice cakes too. A tradition of the Uchiha family. A tradition to honor Obito, the eldest son. Now deceased ten years ago. It wasn't him, it couldn't be him ten years ago. Kakashi had made a mistake and now...
...Now he couldn't breathe.
Mikoto looked Kakashi up and down, her gaze laden with silent judgment. He was the last person she wanted to see at that moment — at any moment. While Kakashi looked like he was about to collapse, Mikoto ignored him. And Itachi, standing next to his mother, seemed unsure of what to do in the face of the alpha's sudden appearance.
Iruka, recognizing the Uchiha family because of Sasuke, felt the tension rise. The air seemed to stiffen around Kakashi. He could see, even from a distance, the silver-haired man's face close up, his breathing become irregular, his body almost trembling.
Without hesitation, the omega stood up and walked slowly toward Kakashi, placing his light hand on his arm.
— Kakashi-san? — He felt the man's entire body stiffen. — It's okay. I'm here. — Iruka tried to sound gentle. Reassuring.
Mikoto, noticing Iruka's approach, smiled condescendingly, but her expression changed when she saw that he was next to Kakashi. Leaning on him, trying to help him.
— You don't deserve to move on. — She spat at the silver-haired man, her voice cold and cutting, before turning and walking away without looking back, Itachi at her side. They left without taking the rice cakes, which were still being fried after the boy's order.
Kakashi stood still for a few seconds, the weight of that sentence sinking into his chest. Iruka carefully guided him out of the fair and to a bench in a nearby park, where they finally sat down. The silence between them was dense, heavy, but at the same time comforting. Iruka felt that there were still so many things Kakashi hadn't told him yet, so many open wounds that kept him on invisible guard. The omega didn't intend to force any of this information out of him, so he just stayed by his side.
He released his pheromones gently, more aware of them and with greater control.
Gradually, Kakashi's breathing stabilized. Gradually, color returned to his face. Gradually, he correctly processed the reality around him, remembered the omega at his side, connected with the world he currently inhabited at that moment. He stopped dissociating.
Iruka wanted to be there when the alpha felt ready to open up.
But deep down, he knew that those internal walls around Kakashi would still take time to fall. He was patient, but at the same time he knew that there was a biological issue that couldn't wait that long. Iruka had a bitter solution, but he would think about that later.
— Kakashi? — He called the alpha softly, carefully. He hoped his crisis was finally over. He didn't deserve this, he didn't deserve those cutting words from Mrs. Uchiha, because what had happened to Obito, even if Iruka didn't know what, couldn't be Kakashi's direct and sole fault.
Kakashi took a few seconds before responding. The name spoken so softly by Iruka seemed to float in the air, gentle and present. He finally turned his face toward the omega. Emotions still reverberated beneath his pale skin, but now there was something else there: exhaustion.
— I heard... his voice,— he said at last, his voice low, hoarse, almost breathless. — For a second, I thought... But it was Itachi...
He didn't finish. The silence that followed was a space for the grief that never ceased, for the pain and anguish that constantly inhabited his chest. Every day.
Iruka said nothing. He just stood beside him, his posture open, his shoulders relaxed, like a constant presence. Because all he wanted at that moment was to be there. To show Kakashi that he too knew how to care.
— Mikoto... — Kakashi began, but stopped, his fingers clenching his knees so tightly that his knuckles turned white. — She's right, you know? Maybe I really shouldn't...
Iruka turned slightly toward him.
— No. — he said firmly, but without aggression. — She's hurt. And maybe she doesn't know what to do with that pain. But that doesn't mean you have to carry it all yourself, Kakashi.
The alpha looked at him sideways, as if he wanted to believe it. In fact, he needed to believe it.
Iruka smiled, a short, sad gesture. But still sympathetic.
— You have the right to move on. Even with ghosts. Even with scars. That doesn't make you any less worthy.
Kakashi looked away, but Iruka noticed: he was absorbing those words, even if only little by little. He took a deep breath, his shoulders relaxing slightly.
Silence returned, but it was no longer so oppressive. It was a silence of sharing. Comfortable — like so many others they had shared before.
The night continued on its course. The lights of the fair, in the distance, were already beginning to go out. The park was silent, except for the occasional muffled, indistinguishable sound and leaves rustling.
Iruka leaned back a little further on the bench, crossing his arms. He felt the emotional weight of the unexpected encounter with the Uchihas on his body, and the feeling that the world around him was in suspension. He could clearly feel the space between one heartbeat and the next. He was demanding too much of a man like Kakashi, with so much grief and trauma still lingering in his heart.
He couldn't demand so much from Kakashi because of his own biological need. He couldn't wait. Kakashi already had a lot to deal with. Iruka didn't want to be a burden to him, no matter how solicitous the alpha had been. At that moment, all he wanted was for the silver-haired man to breathe again without pain.
— I'm sorry. — Kakashi whispered. — We didn't even eat...
— It's okay, Kakashi-san. — Iruka smiled empathetically. — Let's go back to our cars, hm? You need to go home. It's late. Sakura will worry. — Kakashi nodded, and the two stood up. There were no hugs on the walk back. They remained side by side; Kakashi feeling broken by the vulnerability he had revealed in such a short space of time.
They said goodbye briefly. There was no almost-kiss.
Kakashi knew what had happened: he had built a wall around them. He had ruined the progress they had made because of his insurmountable grief. However, that night, he needed to focus on those feelings.
He drove home in silence. Sakura was already asleep and had left him a note in the kitchen saying she would be in her room, fast asleep. He smiled sadly at his daughter's impeccable handwriting, put the note in his pocket, and headed for his office. Pakkun was sleeping with her, so he didn't come to greet his owner cheerfully when he entered.
In the office, Kakashi opened one of the book cabinets. In that particular one, he kept boxes with volumes and more volumes of Obito's novels that had not been sent to bookstores. He couldn't sell them. He felt that this kept his old partner close to him, as if it were the last spark of his life.
He picked up one of the boxes, opened it, and took out a novel.
The title on the cover was “Places Where the Sun Still Shines” — 「まだ陽のあたる場所」. It was the only collection of short stories Obito had published while still alive, and one of Kakashi's favorite books. But he rarely reread it because it hurt too much. On that particular night, he needed to feel close to him, even if it was through pain. But Kakashi wasn't reading for the content now. He flipped to the last page, where, in that particular copy, the first one in the box, Obito had written a dedication to his husband:
“To you,
who taught me to see beauty around every corner,
who made silence a refuge.
Who never needed many words to understand me.
If this book is read by others, I hope they see the world.
But if it is you who holds it now,
I hope you see me, between the lines.
Forever yours,
— O.”
{...}
[Messages sent]:
[Me]: [12:17 a.m.]: Hi, Mizuki. About earlier today: I think it would be better if we talked at another time, outside of school. Do you have a place in mind?
Notes:
I hope you can forgive me!
As many of you responded to the idea of the love triangle: I'm going to write it!!!! But I don't know when I'll post it yet. I want to get a few chapters ready first and then post them... I'll let you know when I post! Kisses!
Chapter 12: Stuck
Summary:
Kakashi confesses his feelings.
Notes:
I hope you enjoy the chapter <3
song: Margaret - Lana del Rey.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
He met Margaret on a rooftop, she was wearing white
And he was like: I might be in trouble
He had flashes of the good life, he was like
Shall I jump off this building now or do it on the double?
'Cause, baby, if your love is in trouble
Baby, if your love is in trouble
Baby, if your love is in trouble
When you know, you know
When you know, you know
It was Tuesday afternoon when Iruka arrived like a hurricane at Professor Orochimaru's laboratory, carrying a small box of sealed vials with the samples he would analyze in the coming hours. Or days. It all depended on the current dynamics of the laboratory: not that the environment was crowded, it was always just the three of them: Orochimaru, Kabuto, and Iruka.
However, the conversations could sometimes be quite... awkward.
In any case, he was excited. Despite the previous day's minor incident involving Kakashi, Mikoto, and Itachi, Iruka felt he could distract himself for a few hours with something he loved very much: researching amphibians — especially frogs. He had to admit, however, that he was really worried about the alpha, but he hadn't sent him a message because he didn't want to burden Kakashi even more. He felt that he had already placed a lot of information and responsibilities on the police officer. He didn't want to scare him even more. Iruka was feeling guilty about the whole situation — even though he himself was having to deal with a thousand and one things as well.
He had, however, sent a message to Mizuki. Tsunade's words about a partner were still hammering his mind in an unpleasant way. He knew it wasn't the doctor's intention to leave him like that, but at the same time she needed to be honest. And Tsunade, more than anyone else, cared for Iruka as if he were her son. He hadn't even updated his parents on the latest news because he didn't want to worry them, since they were on the other side of the world now. Although it was difficult to go through all this alone, he had to endure it and not be a burden to others.
Iruka had sent a message to Mizuki because he was the only alpha who could serve as a partner.
The idea didn't appeal to Iruka. Not one bit. It seemed very awkward, therefore, to talk to Mizuki. But there was no other alpha except Kakashi — and Iruka felt he was relying too much on the silver-haired man, more than he should. More than was fair. He didn't want to ask too much of Kakashi, he didn't want to feel like a nuisance. So he would turn to Mizuki...
...But only if things went completely wrong with Kakashi.
Part of Iruka felt that this would happen. The incident with Mikoto had only confirmed this for the omega.
Mizuki had replied early, as if it had been the first thing he had done upon waking up.
[Mizuki] [5:30 a.m.]: Of course. Whenever you want, Iruka, we can meet at that café on campus. You know the one I'm talking about.
And, unfortunately, Iruka knew. It was their favorite café from when they were dating.
Iruka had never been back there since the breakup — which had come from him, from Iruka himself, and was horrible anyway. He felt a little humiliated now, asking to see him again, but at least Mizuki had sent a message first. And it was he who was suddenly invading and returning to the omega's life overnight. Iruka hadn't even replied yet, he had only viewed it through the notification bar on his phone.
— Did you collect the exotics, Iruka-kun? — Orochimaru's melodious voice pulled Iruka out of his thoughts. He had been moving on autopilot, even though he had cheerfully greeted the other two researchers earlier. He had left the box on the counter to begin the analysis.
— Yes, Orochimaru-sama. I'll analyze them now...
— I hope you find some unexpected secretions. — Orochimaru almost moaned as he said those words, already feeling good just at the possibility. Iruka smiled awkwardly and nodded. He was already used to his advisor's behavior: Orochimaru was a man who lived for his research. Sometimes it was quite beautiful to watch.
His long hair was tied back in a tight bun, his lab coat perfectly fitted to his slender body, and he wore gloves. Iruka was dressed no differently, but he was messier than the older man: his hair was tied back in a loose bun, with a few strands escaping around his face, his lab coat open, and his gloves perfectly fitted to his hands. Kabuto was dressed the same as Orochimaru, his round glasses glistening under the white light of the laboratory. He was a little further away, in a corner staring at the computer as he typed furiously. He had a cup of very bitter coffee beside him.
Everything in there was in order — at least that.
Filling the silence of the room, besides Kabuto's fingers tapping loudly on the keyboard, was classical instrumental music. Orochimaru always did this; he really liked music and said he could only concentrate with some melody playing in the background. He even seemed quite focused now: he looked at something under a state-of-the-art microscope and then turned to write down some observations in a notebook in his chaotic handwriting, which Iruka had learned to read. It had been like deciphering codes.
The omega then set about analyzing what he had brought in the box. They were analyzing samples — such as the skin of selected amphibians — collected in the field from urban coastal ecosystems, mostly small lakes in parks in the middle of the city. Iruka's main interest in this part was in the chemical compounds released by specific amphibian species that inhabit these places and how these compounds influence ecological relationships, such as predation and defense. It was a practical part of his research, which he had been conducting for several months because he wanted to collect a large number of results to continue developing his dissertation thesis.
Well, the written part of Iruka's research was another story. He could worry about that later.
He spent a few minutes analyzing the samples until he found something interesting: one of them was releasing a compound that apparently attracted ants. Iruka made a note of this and didn't even notice that Kabuto, silent as a ninja, had positioned himself behind him to observe, or rather, monitor the work being done by the dark-haired man:
— Attracting ants now, huh, Iruka-sensei? — Kabuto called him that in a sarcastic tone, because he was a primary school teacher in the mornings. — I thought you only attracted teenagers. — Iruka ignored him, rolling his eyes.
— What did you find there? — Orochimaru approached, his interest overflowing in his tone of voice.
— Nothing interesting... Just unusual. And strange.
— That's what drives science, Iruka-kun. — The omega nodded, smiling kindly as he turned back to the samples. That was the first stage of the analysis: he was cataloging each one and transferring them to labeled glass jars for identification; then he would use a solvent in the liquid phases to dissolve the volatile compounds; then he would concentrate the samples in the centrifuge; later, he would separate them based on boiling points and molecular mass, which would generate a graph — this phase is performed in the chromatograph, a large and noisy machine — and Iruka would interpret the graph using software. Finally, he would manually compare the results with what was already available in existing databases (this would be the most tedious phase). In short, nothing very interesting for those who are not biologists.
— Kabuto, where are the centrifuge adapters? — Iruka asked, moments after finishing all the labeling, already on his knees behind the glass counter.
— Probably in the wrong place, like everything else you keep. — The co-supervisor's curt reply came instantly; after annoying Iruka a little, he had returned to his place in front of the computer.
— I put them away properly, the last time I used them was last week...
— And last week you also forgot to turn off the centrifuge for ten extra minutes. Thank me that your compounds are still intact. — Iruka found the adapters, half hidden under a pile of discarded gloves. Not thanks to Kabuto.
— Here they are. And I know how to operate a centrifuge without causing a mini apocalypse. Little oversights can happen...
Kabuto said nothing, remaining focused on the laptop screen, doing whatever he was doing. With the tubes properly labeled, Iruka fitted them into the centrifuge. The samples had undergone solvent extraction, and now he needed to separate the residual solid fraction from the compounds that would be taken for analysis. He adjusted the time and speed — 4500 rpm — and closed the lid.
— Five minutes. If nothing explodes by then, we're in the clear — he said aloud, to no one in particular, sounding cheerful as usual.
— You talk as if it hadn't already exploded once — Kabuto retorted almost immediately.
— It was a 50 mL beaker, and technically it was just an overflow...
— You boiled hexane, Iruka.
— Accidentally, Kabuto. Accidentally. — He repeated, making sure to say the last part syllable by syllable.
The centrifuge began to spin. The low noise of the rotation increased until it reached a constant hum, drowning out the harmonious sound Orochimaru had put in the lab.
— Where exactly did these samples come from? — The teacher asked, even with all that noise, still focused on his task.
— From around the municipal school in Sapporo. The one with the green area and drainage canal in the back — Iruka replied promptly.
— Ah, the stinky canal. It's excellent broth for research — Orochimaru observed, sounding satisfied as always.
— Broth? It's a sewer. — Iruka grimaced, but spoke quietly enough that his advisor couldn't hear him.
The centrifuge beeped. He opened the lid, carefully removed the tubes, and moved on to the next step: pipetting the liquid fraction into glass vials, which would be taken to the chromatograph.
— I swear by everything that is most sacred in this university that if you drop this, Kabuto, I will report you to the ethics committee. — It was Iruka's turn to retort now, even though Kabuto was quiet. But whenever he was too quiet, it was a bad sign.
— I didn't even touch your tube! — The silver-haired man retorted automatically, sounding defensive.
— I'm sure you're casting bad energy through those glasses. — Iruka narrowed his eyes.
Orochimaru laughed silently, now in a corner armchair, reviewing drafts of articles on his tablet.
— The tension between you is what makes this lab productive. As long as you don't kill each other before the qualification. — The older man shrugged.
Iruka then went to the chromatograph, carefully placing all the tubes inside.
— If this works, it will be by chance. — Kabuto teased, wrinkling his nose at the strong smell of solvents that filled the lab.
— And if it goes wrong, it's your fault — Iruka growled.
On the machine's screen, the peaks began to rise slowly, revealing the volatile chemical compounds extracted from the samples — that's how the graph is made.
Orochimaru approached and watched, satisfied as always and attentive to what the results indicated.
— This one... could be a new terpene. Maybe something related to threat communication...
— Or a mating signal adapted to the urban environment... — Iruka added, thoughtfully.
For a few hours, Iruka was able to distract himself from the biological situation surrounding his body and do something he loved very much. Still, the fact that Kakashi hadn't sent him any messages made him a little upset and frustrated — and he felt an unwelcome certainty that he had done the right thing in contacting Mizuki.
{...}
The next day was the start of the science fair.
It was barely 8:30 in the morning — the official start time for classes every day — and the hallways were already crowded with students, teachers, and some parents. The science fair was an event that had started a few years ago, along with Iruka's hiring at the school — he had just graduated with a degree in Biology six years ago — and the omega had been involved with the project ever since, as one of the main coordinators. The entire school was involved in the event: from the early years to high school.
The students' exhibits took place in the covered gymnasium, which was quite spacious and could accommodate a wide variety of stands in an organized manner. Iruka tried to act as coordinator for the students alongside the other science teachers, but the intention was to let the students take the lead in their own initiatives. The results always filled Iruka's heart with pride; he truly loved teaching. He always wanted to be the guide he had lacked in his childhood and adolescence — of course, his parents were very present, but at school, someone in that role makes all the difference in a child's life.
Maybe, just maybe, if he had had someone like that, he would never have had that scar on his face. That was irreversible now, but sometimes Iruka found himself thinking about it.
But our focus now is not the teacher.
At the school entrance, Hatake Kakashi adjusted the sleeves of his shirt with one hand with his long fingers. He was feeling a little nervous, he had to admit, because he knew he would inevitably see Iruka that day. They hadn't seen each other since Monday, after saying goodbye at the street fair. After Kakashi had panicked because he thought he had heard Obito's voice and had the scary encounter with Itachi and Mikoto. Kakashi wanted to talk to Iruka about it and make it clear that, despite his past, he didn't want his long history of trauma to be an obstacle to what the two of them were building. Even though Kakashi had a lot to deal with, he was willing to try with Iruka.
He wanted to help him, but it wasn't just that.
Kakashi had chosen an outfit that, honestly, seemed a bit too much now. He was wearing a white button-down polo shirt with long sleeves. He had rolled up the sleeves to the end of his forearms elegantly and left the top two buttons of the shirt open. It hugged his broad chest and torso perfectly, masterfully outlining the policeman's muscular body. His biceps and forearms stood out against the fabric. On his legs, he wore relatively loose jeans, with his shirt neatly tucked into the waistband. He hadn't worn a belt because he didn't think it was necessary — he was already dressed just right. It was Sakura's science fair; he was there to see his daughter...
...and Iruka. He had to admit it.
He would be proud of Sakura regardless of the project she presented. He knew his daughter very well, and he was already sure she would show something incredible. She herself would not accept anything less. She had been planning every little detail with her friends for months.
As he passed the school entrance, Kakashi ran a hand through his hair. It was as usual: neat, but not too neat. It was a casual style that suited his age, nonetheless.
— Kakashi! — He heard Uzumaki Kushina's cheerful voice call him as soon as he took a few steps inside. She was there with Minato, both smiling at the alpha.
— Good morning. Did Naruto run away from you too? Because as soon as I parked the car in front of the school, Sakura ran out with all her project arrangements.
— Of course he did... He was desperate because he had to set up some things before she arrived. And we kind of just got here too. I think Sakura is going to fight with him anyway. — Minato shrugged, which made Kakashi laugh.
— It's good for him to learn. We just didn't get here earlier because he missed the time. — Kushina explained, smiling. — Are you okay, Kakashi-san? How have things been going?
— I'm fine. — He shoved his hands in his pockets. — A little hectic, but nothing out of control.
— Hectic how? — Kushina smiled mischievously. — Maybe, just maybe, Kurenai told me a little something... Hey! — She scolded Minato, who stared at her with wide eyes and shook his head. Kakashi looked at one and then the other out of the corner of his eye.
— What exactly did Kurenai tell you? — He sounded suspicious.
— Of course she didn't give any details, but we're not idiots either...
— Kushina asked after you left dinner that day at Kurenai and Asuma's house — Minato interjected. — We noticed, well, we noticed something between you and Iruka-sensei. Sorry, Kakashi, but it was kind of obvious. Especially after he left so suddenly.
Kakashi didn't know where to hide his face.
— Well, I thought I had disguised it so well...
— So you confirm that something is going on? — Kushina stared at him with bright eyes. — Kakashi, this is incredible gossip! But isn't Iruka, um, much younger than us? I would never have imagined that you would be with someone so much y—
— Everyone, your children's presentations are about to begin! — Kurenai appeared suddenly, as if she had been summoned after they had mentioned her. She had appeared at an extremely opportune moment, too, because both Minato and Kakashi didn't know exactly what to do after Kushina had commented on the age difference between Kakashi and Iruka. — Good morning, everyone! — She smiled, placing her hands on Kakashi's waist and guiding him to the gym next to the other couple. — You look handsome today, huh, Kakashi? — She teased.
— Thank you very much... — He thanked her. — Complimenting me after I found out you're spreading my personal life around?”
Kushina shrugged.
— We're friends, Kakashi! She didn't spread anything.
— Kushina, you promised not to tell...
— Ah, Kurenai, it seems you don't know what a gossip she is... — Minato received a slap on the back of the head for that comment.
They were soon in the gym, where the exhibition was already underway. Several students enthusiastically explained their stands to teachers, coordinators, some visiting researchers, and the principal. Kakashi recognized some familiar faces: Hiruzen, Gai, Shikamaru, Kiba, Neji, Hinata, Ino... Sakura and Naruto must have been somewhere else, probably sorting out some last-minute detail that the blond had forgotten, but Kakashi knew they would show up soon.
It didn't take long for his eyes to find Iruka.
If Kakashi thought he had gotten himself together, Iruka had just humiliated him.
The omega was a few feet away from the alpha, talking to a younger student —Kakashi knew who he was because he was the principal's grandson: Konohamaru. Iruka was smiling at the little boy, who was enthusiastically explaining to the teacher about the paper volcano he had drawn and assembled with his friends. Iruka had a clipboard in his hands, but he wasn't taking any notes, much more preoccupied with interacting with the boy, who was becoming increasingly enthusiastic in response to the reactions and thought-provoking questions of the teacher he so admired. Kakashi's heart skipped a beat for a millisecond when he realized that Iruka's affection was practically natural and innate, extending to his students. He conveyed that behavior so easily that it made it seem effortless. On top of that, Iruka was absolutely gorgeous — so gorgeous that he had stolen Kakashi's ability to breathe.
The teacher was wearing a white ribbed T-shirt, contrasting beautifully with his tanned skin, with a crew neck and a snug fit on the shoulders and chest, but slightly loose on the torso. Kakashi could see the outline of his waist in the morning light; the shirt completely complemented the omega's perfect body shape. Kakashi had already felt Iruka's torso against his own, had already wrapped one arm around that slim waist, which contrasted perfectly with the width of his hips — as if Iruka were a guitar. Moving down to his legs, the brunette was wearing light, slim-cut tailored pants in a dark moss green color, with a well-fitting waistband and a fluid drape — which further enhanced his every curve. On his feet, a pair of low-top Converse, typical of him.
Around Iruka's neck hung his school ID badge. It was decorated with stickers, pins, and drawings lovingly made by students of all ages. His hair was loose that morning, and even though Kakashi had seen it in so many ways — tied back, loose, to the side— he still hadn't gotten used to Iruka's absolutely impossible beauty. It seemed as if a naturally golden aura emanated from the teacher, as if he were pure light. Kakashi noticed that during his conversation with Konohamaru and his classmates, Iruka tucked a few strands of hair behind his ear with slight irritation, as if he wished he had tied it back — but Kakashi thought he was beautiful anyway.
Iruka finished his evaluation of the teacher by giving the students a thumbs up, who celebrated, and then coincidentally turned in Kakashi's direction. The alpha had remained standing there at the front of the gym, alone, because Kurenai, Minato, and Kushina had already made their way among the students' stands. The two made eye contact, and it seemed as if everyone around them disappeared at that moment.
For Kakashi, there was only Iruka in front of him, a few meters away.
No matter how crowded the gym was around them, Kakashi could hear nothing and no one else. Iruka remained motionless, hugging the clipboard to his chest. Kakashi mentally wished that he could have some visual ability at that moment to capture moments, because all he wanted now was to keep that image of Iruka in his memory, standing still, waiting for him to approach.
And that was exactly what the alpha did.
He closed the distance between them with determined steps and stopped when that distance became only a few respectful inches. Iruka was smiling, still awkwardly, when Kakashi was the first to break the silence:
— Good morning, Iruka-sensei.
— Good morning, Hatake-san. — Kakashi raised his eyebrows, surprised by the new way he was being addressed. — Are you enjoying the fair?
— I just got here, but yes. Very much. — Kakashi's gaze softened. — How are you?
— Fine, just busy... — Iruka chuckled softly. — And you?
— Better now. — The automatic response made Iruka's cheeks tinge with a red that made Kakashi's heart leap in his chest, because he was so beautiful. And so authentic. Kakashi wanted to do things with him that only his perverted books would understand.
— Have you seen Sakura-chan's project? I was going there now. — Iruka gathered his strength to speak, because he didn't want to sound pathetic in front of Kakashi.
— Not yet. I'll go with you, then. — The omega smiled. — I know you're busy today, but I... I wanted to talk about us—
— Don't worry, Kakashi. If it's about what happened on Monday, it's okay. — Iruka interrupted him gently. — I'm sorry if I pressured you.
— But you didn't—
— I'm not going to ask anything too much of you, Kakashi. I don't want to be a burden. — Iruka had rehearsed those words so much the day before that he didn't notice Kakashi was disagreeing. — We can... We can take it slowly, okay? — At your own pace. I can handle my own problems. You don't have to deal with them. — He smiled a little more and then stared at the clipboard. — Shall we go? I need to evaluate Sakura.
And he walked ahead, leaving Kakashi standing still.
He couldn't process what had happened.
Iruka had... Iruka had dismissed him?
Kakashi hadn't expected him to want to talk in the middle of school, during working hours. But it had hardly been a conversation. It seemed more like Iruka had delivered an automatic monologue that he had spent hours memorizing for Kakashi. He hadn't even listened to what the alpha had said. All Kakashi wanted was to make it clear that he wanted to meet with him again and talk about everything. To make his feelings and desires clear.
But it seemed that Iruka was expecting the opposite: that Kakashi would want to distance himself.
Which was the last thing he wanted.
Since Kakashi didn't have many options, he just followed Iruka to his daughter's booth. He could see the group of four teenagers around the project: Sakura, Naruto, Ino, and Hinata — the same ones who had spent several weekends at his house planning every little detail.
And it had turned out spectacular.
Their effort had been worth every second.
Sakura's group's booth was one of the busiest in the central wing of the fair. Among rows of tables covered with light green fabric, a main counter stood out with four large pots, where sensitive plants and robust bean plants were planted, connected by colored wires to small homemade sensors — a direct contribution from Ino and her family, who owned a famous flower shop. Above the counter, a handmade poster displayed the title: “Plants that feel — communication between plant organisms and their response to the environment,” handwritten in purple marker in elegant letters, which had been delicately done by Hinata, even the choice of colors.
Next to it, a small television, borrowed from the school's multimedia room, played videos recorded by Naruto: dramatic close-ups of the plants closing, while he narrated in an exaggerated manner, but typical of his personality: “Observe the precise moment when the plant feels... fear?! Perhaps affection?” which made visitors laugh. Hinata, with a shy smile, held a notebook and distributed leaflets with a summary of the research, explaining all the experimental protocols in detail.
Sakura stood in the center, her hair tied up in a high bun, sounding absurdly enthusiastic and determined as she explained the group's project procedures to Minato and Kushina, with Ino adding whatever was necessary in the same tone. The pink-haired girl pointed to the sensors and explained the function of each one, casually mentioning terms such as “mechanical receptors” and “plant bioelectrogenesis,” as if it were the most fun thing in the world.
Ino also organized the pots, tidied up the wires, replaced the badges, and nudged Naruto every time he improvised a joke outside the script—written by Sakura and which she had made each of them review a million times.
— We proved that they really react, look! — Naruto would sometimes blurt out during the presentation to his own parents, who smiled proudly at their only son. That comment had been particularly about a group of mimosas that quickly retracted when touched, even if the touch was minimal. Kakashi already felt his chest fill with pride as he approached, happy to see his daughter so focused, surrounded by friends and... Enlightened. Yes, definitely enlightened.
It reminded him of Obito. He would be absurdly happy if he were there.
— Hi, kids — Iruka cheerfully called their attention after they finished their presentation to Minato and Kushina, who applauded them. — Can you present it to me now?”
— Of course, sensei. — Sakura was the first to speak, getting everything ready to start again. Hinata handed him and Kakashi the pamphlets with the research summary, and Iruka was unable to hide the look of impressiveness on his face. When Sakura looked at Kakashi, for a brief second, he gave her a thumbs up, as if to say, “You're doing great. Daddy's here” through the gesture. She smiled at him.
— This is... very good. Congratulations, everyone. — Iruka looked at each of them, who returned his gaze with a smile.
— I knew it would be great. We're going to get an A, believe it. — Naruto's comment elicited a muffled chuckle from Kakashi.
— Don't count your chickens, Naruto... — Iruka feigned a stern tone as he adjusted the clipboard in his arms. — You may begin.
— I'm going to evaluate this group now, too. — Mizuki appeared like a sneaky cat beside Iruka. No one had noticed him approaching, not even Kakashi. The alpha stared at the other man from head to toe. He didn't know this man, so he probably wasn't a teacher at the school. Unless he was a new teacher. Faced with the confused looks of parents and teenagers, Mizuki took the cue to introduce himself: — Forgive me for my unexpected appearance. My name is Mizuki, I am a researcher at Osaka University, and I am here to contribute to the science fair at the invitation of Principal Hiruzen. I am also a longtime colleague of Iruka here. — He tried to lighten the mood, but failed. Everyone nodded, except Kakashi.
Ino and Sakura exchanged a knowing glance. They still had their suspicions that this was Iruka-sensei's “mysterious boyfriend who leaves mochis.”
Kakashi, however, had overheard a conversation with Kurenai. He had heard that name before: Mizuki. He was Iruka's ex-boyfriend. She had told the police officer that the breakup had been horrible, and that Iruka barely touched on the subject.
Great.
Although Mizuki had proven to be a nuisance, Kakashi found it easy to ignore him while devoting his full attention to his daughter's presentation. He carefully tucked the pamphlet with the summary into his pocket and took out his cell phone, deciding to record Sakura as she presented as if she were already a scientist:
— These sensors pick up small electrical variations in plant tissue and translate them into graphic and sound signals to make it easier for the audience to understand — Sakura explained excitedly. — We did tests on time, frequency, and even intensity. It was Naruto who had the idea of using different textures for the stimuli, like cotton, metal, wood...
— I wanted to see if she preferred affection or fear — Naruto muttered, shrinking a little, but with a silly smile on his face.
— And we found that they ‘prefer’ light and frequent touch — Hinata added, pointing to the records displayed at the booth. — After a few minutes, the plants no longer reacted to this type of touch, as if they had become accustomed to it.
— Which is a form of sensory desensitization — Ino pointed out, practical. — Iruka-sensei explained some terms to us during the last semester. — Iruka smiled, still proud. In fact, he was increasingly proud.
The omega listened silently, his eyes dancing between the faces of the four students. His smile was a picture of pride and admiration, and Kakashi, standing next to him, caught a glimpse of the man Iruka would be as a father. Inevitably, the alpha's mind led him to just that kind of scenario: the tenderness in the way he validated each student's contributions, the genuine enthusiasm, the care in asking questions that didn't put them on the defensive... It was impressive. For a second, overcome by a warmth that definitely had nothing to do with instinct or need, Kakashi wished he was the person Iruka could have children with. He could pay any amount, or whatever it took, to be by the omega's side at that moment.
But he quickly dismissed the thought, feeling his face flush as well. What had he just been thinking?
— I'd love to see your full report after the fair — Iruka finally said, as he wrote on his clipboard, this time for real. He had already congratulated the four students too much.
— Excellent work — a male voice filled the room between them, coming from Iruka's side, with a tone too excited to sound purely professional. It was Mizuki, of course. — You were one of the groups that impressed me the most so far.
Kakashi was the first to stare at him now. The other alpha's eyes quickly scanned the group of students, but lingered on Iruka for too long — long enough for Kakashi to raise his chin slightly, attentive to any movement coming from the researcher.
— I was just looking for you, Iruka. — Mizuki smiled, completely ignoring Kakashi's presence. — We need to talk about the second-year presentation, remember? You mentioned that you could review the evaluation criteria with me. I thought we could do that now that we’re done here.
Iruka hesitated. His body stiffened imperceptibly, as if instinctively trying to shrink. But he quickly composed himself.
— Sure, Mizuki. Just give me a little more time here—
— Iruka! — Kurenai appeared like a hurricane, interrupting the conversation. Once again, Kakashi found her appearance more than timely. — I forgot to pick up some boxes with the necessary materials for Shimakaru, Kiba, and Shino's presentation! Can you get them for me, please? I need to help the boys with the insects Shino brought for the project... — She took a key out of her pants pocket and handed it to him. She completely ignored Mizuki. — They're some pretty heavy boxes... — Her gaze then found Kakashi, over Iruka's shoulder. — Kakashi-san! Please help him? The boxes are in the music room, upstairs.
Kakashi wasn't going to refuse.
— Kakashi, you don't have to go... — Iruka was already dismissing him, but Kakashi refused.
— I'll go. Just give me a second, Iruka-sensei? — The omega nodded. Mizuki had fortunately already disappeared: in fact, Kurenai had dragged him away to evaluate another project, far away from Iruka.
Kakashi moved away from the teacher and approached Sakura, hugging his daughter while she was off guard. A pinkish blush of embarrassment tinged the girl's face, but she melted into her father's arms, not taking long to return Kakashi's warm, tight hug. She buried her face against his chest, able to hear the powerful heart inside. The heart that could hold the most love inside.
— I'm very proud of you, my love — he murmured. He expected her to fight with him and say something like, “Dad, my friends are here and they'll hear us!”
But Sakura said nothing.
She was smiling.
— I know — she murmured, turning her face to look at him. — Thank you for coming. You always come, but I will always be grateful.
— I know — he repeated, smiling without being able or wanting to contain himself. — Congratulations on the project, my girl. — Sakura felt like crying, not out of sadness at the nickname, but out of happiness. Happiness mixed with the purest love.
— Thank you. — She hugged him for a while. — Now, go help Iruka-sensei! I heard Kurenai-sensei from here. I need to introduce it to more people!
— Whatever you say, dear — Kakashi joked, then returned to Iruka's side, who smiled at him tenderly. He had watched the scene respectfully, happy for the moment of affection between the two. — Shall we go, Iruka-sensei?
— Let's go, Kakashi-san. — Iruka chuckled softly and walked away from the gym, followed by Kakashi to the stairs leading to the second floor of the school. The walk to the classroom was quiet, but at the same time lighthearted. Iruka unlocked the door with his key and then left the clipboard on a table inside the room. He stared at the stacked boxes: there were only two boxes on the floor, but they were huge. The boys' project involved insects and handmade light traps, so much of the material was fragile — and very bulky.
— They really didn't skimp... — Iruka commented, raising an eyebrow at the boxes. He took a step forward and bent down to test the weight of the first one.
Kakashi approached and crouched down beside him, assessing the second one.
— Heavy?
— A little...
Kakashi nodded, picking up the lid of the nearest box and looking at the contents: cases with glass jars, small insect nurseries, and a stack of plastic-coated folders.
— These kids surprised me. Bioluminescent insects? Is that even the right term?
Iruka smiled proudly and sighed, stifling a muffled laugh.
— Kurenai helped a lot with this, but the boys have a genuine interest. They looked for scientific articles and even showed me a live stream from a Kyoto university on the subject...
Kakashi noticed the quiet enthusiasm in the teacher's eyes. It was a calm, sincere light that spoke volumes about how much Iruka cared. Not just about the content — but about the students.
— You carry the whole school on your back. They should be more grateful for that.
Iruka looked away for a second, with an embarrassed laugh.
— I... do what I can. And I like what I do. That helps a lot.
Kakashi then carefully stacked one box on top of another and lifted both off the floor at once, as if they weighed nothing, while Iruka just watched, unable to protest. The veins in the cop's forearms bulged, but he didn't seem to be making any effort. Iruka swallowed hard: he had never had a real sense of the officer's strength.
Feeling those hands... That strength...
— Kakashi, can you really carry everything...?
— Of course. Shall we go? — He smiled kindly, and Iruka didn't know if he was more unsettled by the smile or the gratuitous display of strength. Oh, how he wished he were one of those boxes right now...
— Uh-huh — Iruka forced himself to say, and turned to the door, which had closed in the wind. He turned the knob, but nothing happened. The door remained in place.
The omega frowned, trying again. And then again. And again: without success.
— Is there a problem, Iruka-sensei? — Kakashi asked, still balancing the boxes in his arms.
— The door won't open. — Iruka twisted the knob with more conviction. It creaked... But remained firmly in place. — It must be stuck.
— Stuck? — Kakashi stepped forward, carefully placing the boxes on the floor and going to Iruka's side. The teacher made room for him, and the alpha tried to open it with more force, but still cautiously. — Uh-huh. It does seem stuck. Maybe the latch has slipped out of its socket.
Iruka let out a muffled sigh and looked around. There were no large windows, just a few tall, tilting ones. The door to that particular room had a habit of sticking, but never like this.
— I should have notified the janitor, but I always managed to get out after a few tries.
Kakashi let go of the doorknob and crossed his arms.
— And do you often get locked in rooms?
Iruka rolled his eyes, laughing nervously, feeling the alpha's gaze weighing on him. The room suddenly seemed smaller.
— I'm going to call Kurenai. — He cleared his throat, swallowing hard.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone, but, as if it were a humorous curse, the screen flashed with a warning:
No signal.
— Of course — he muttered, showing the screen to Kakashi with resignation.
— The building structure is old — Kakashi observed, leaning against the door with a crooked smile. — I bet if we lean our backs against the opposite wall and kick the doorknob hard...
— It'll break the door. — Iruka crossed his arms. — I don't think we need to take such drastic measures...
— Yeah, you're right. — Kakashi raised his hands. — Sorry, I'm thinking like a cop.
— Are you in the habit of breaking down doors? — The omega raised an eyebrow.
— Fortunately, no, because I'm an inspector. It's more desk work, you know. — Iruka almost made a comment about his strength: Kakashi really did have the ability to destroy that doorknob with his hands, considering how easily he had lifted the two boxes as if they were nothing... Focus, Iruka, focus!
Iruka was still processing how funny and unexpected that situation seemed: the two of them locked in the music room. Him and Kakashi, the same person with whom he had lost control of his pheromones a few days ago. The same person who was the only alpha with whom he was compatible. The same alpha with whom his doctor had told them to consider being sexual partners.
Fate never tired of setting up that kind of situation for them, apparently.
— Excuse me, Kakashi... — Iruka asked and tried to open the door handle a few times, but without success. — Hello? Is anyone out there? It's Iruka-sensei! — He raised his voice, hoping someone could hear them. Everyone from the school was in the gym now, but who knows — I'm locked in this room!
They waited a few minutes, but nothing happened. Iruka sighed and it was his turn to lean against the stuck door. Kakashi was standing in front of him, a few feet away, his hips resting on the table where he had placed the boxes. He had crossed his arms over his broad chest, which Iruka could glimpse because of the two dangerously open buttons on his white shirt. Fortunately, Tsunade's suppressants were working well, and Iruka was taking them all correctly. Otherwise, he would have advanced on Kakashi long ago.
— Is it selfish of me to be happy that we're locked in here? — The alpha blurted out, uncrossing his arms to rest his hands on the edges of the table. — I really wanted to talk to you, Iruka, and you didn't even let me speak first.
Iruka was speechless. He blinked a few times, perplexed, and remained silent. Kakashi took advantage of the cue.
— I'm sorry about the incident at the street fair. I know I already apologized, but... But I didn't mean to scare you with that.
— It wasn't on purpose, Kakashi. It's okay, really. You already apologized, which really wasn't necessary—
— Iruka. — Kakashi's voice sounded lower. He moved away from the table and approached the teacher, once again closing the distance between them. — Let me speak, hm? Please. — He then allowed himself to take the teacher's delicate hands, who froze completely at the firm touch of Kakashi's long fingers on his own. He stared at their now joined hands, and Kakashi kept his gaze fixed on Iruka's brown eyes. — It's not okay. I've had scars for a while, and during that time, because of them, I deprived myself of many things. But I don't want to deprive myself anymore... I don't want to deprive myself of what we're building. Even if it happened out of nowhere, even if it's fate playing tricks on us as if we were puppets... — Kakashi paused, now that Iruka was staring him in the eyes. — I don't want you to think that I don't want this. I want to help you with what we're going through, yes, but it's not just that. It's something I felt from the first time I saw you, Iruka, because you're contagious. You have a light of your own that struck me, and for a long time I was in the shadows. I don't want you to think you're a burden to me, when in fact... All I want is for you to trust me, Iruka. Open up to me. — A pause. — I would like to use bolder words, and since we are in this situation, I will say it: I want you to need me, Iruka-sensei. And no one else. Count on me, only me.
Iruka couldn't breathe. With each phoneme, each syllable, each word Kakashi uttered, his breathing became more and more ragged, as if the oxygen in his lungs was being stolen from him. The room was filled with the pheromones of the two; a mixture of scents that hung harmoniously in the room, embracing every inch of it. Kakashi's hands were warm against his own, and he was grateful that Kakashi was close and that he was leaning against the door: the alpha's rigid body and the door behind him kept him standing, because Iruka's legs had easily turned into something resembling jelly. He could hear his own heart as if the organ were inside his ears; it beat so hard that it seemed to want to break through muscle and bone, about to escape from Iruka's chest to hit Kakashi.
Iruka had nothing to say, but he knew exactly how to act. His body too; and not in a way driven by instinct, but by conscious will.
The omega lowered his eyes to Kakashi's mouth, now silent because he had finished speaking, anxious for Iruka's response. The answer came not in words, but in the most meaningful gesture of all: Iruka pressed his lips to Kakashi's. He didn't care if it was during work hours and in the workplace. He couldn't let that opportunity pass, he didn't even care if it would cost him his job, because he had heard the words he needed from Kakashi. The most assertive and necessary words coming from the alpha. The alpha probably had no idea how important that had been to the omega.
They let go of each other's hands as if they had agreed to do so. Iruka wrapped his arms around the alpha's neck, while Kakashi automatically wrapped his arms around his slim waist, pressing their torsos together. Even through the friction of their clothes, Iruka could feel Kakashi's broad, firm chest, as well as his ripped abdomen pressed against him. He gasped against his mouth as the kiss deepened: the two had been thirsty for each other for so long that it didn't take them long to explore each other's mouths with their tongues. Iruka's mouth was warm, just as Kakashi had imagined so many times. Iruka could feel the world spinning around him, intoxicated by the touch and smell of the alpha who pressed him deliciously between his own body and the stuck door.
— ‘Kashi... — He called softly for the police officer, the sound that escaped his mouth vibrating through the alpha's body in a way that made him shiver all over under his clothes. Kakashi nibbled and sucked on Iruka's lower lip, half-opening his eyes to find the teacher in the same situation as him: eyes half-closed, face flushed, and breathing uneven. Kakashi needed a lot of self-control to simply not take him on one of those tables or even against that blessed stuck door.
Blessed, yes, because everything was happening thanks to it.
— Yes, 'Ru? — Kakashi teased with his name, his voice sounding provocative. Iruka was on his tiptoes, and had slid his hands from Kakashi's neck to rest them on his biceps. Kakashi kept his arms around his waist, now with less force. The alpha's breathing was also out of rhythm, and his heart was racing as fast as the omega's.
— I-I thought... I thought I was pressuring you, so I said all that. — Iruka confessed, biting his swollen lower lip. — Forgive me...
— It's okay now. I've already explained how I feel. — Kakashi leaned down to kiss the side of the teacher's neck, making him shiver inside. — Just be patient with me, okay?
Iruka nodded, squeezing his biceps.
— Uh-huh... — He murmured, tilting his head to the side Kakashi was kissing, squirming his feet inside his shoes.
— And count only on me, hm? — Kakashi wished he sounded less possessive, but he honestly wasn't in the best state of mind right now. He raised his head to face Iruka, his slightly dilated pupils betraying his state. Iruka was getting the best view: Kakashi blushing, his lips swollen from the prolonged kiss.
— There's no one else — Iruka murmured in a promising tone and pulled Kakashi in for another kiss filled with that restrained desire that they had both been holding back since their first encounter. Kakashi pressed against Iruka's waist, barely able to restrain his hands, because he also knew they were in a school environment. And during the teacher's working hours, even if an opportunity had arisen for the two of them...
He was about to run his hands down Iruka's body when the door behind the teacher was suddenly opened and the two fell to the floor, Kakashi on top of Iruka: a mountain of lust and muscles.
The omega raised his face to look at the person who had opened the door for them: a student who stared at them with an expression of pure shock.
— Sasuke?! — Iruka and Kakashi said his name in unison.
Notes:
I had SO MUCH fun writing this, hehehe, I hope you all had while reading!!!
Thank you so much for all the kudos, comments, bookmarks, and subscriptions!!!!!! I never imagined this fic would have such an impact!!!! Thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart!!
I love interacting with you guys!! Tell me what you think <3 I'm always open to constructive criticism and suggestions. Hugs and see you next chapter <3 <3 <3
Chapter 13: Something stupid
Summary:
Iruka and Kakashi go on their first (official) date.
Notes:
hope u like <3
song: Something stupid - Frank Sinatra.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
But then I think I'll wait
Until the night moves on
To be alone with you
It's the right moment
Your perfume fills my head
The stars turn red
And, oh, the night is so blue
And then I go and ruin everything
By saying something stupid
Like: I love you
When Sasuke decided to open the door, he knew he would encounter something embarrassing for whoever was inside — he knew that the person there was Iruka-sensei...
...But he never imagined that he would be accompanied by Mr. Hatake. Or rather, by Kakashi, Sakura's father and widower of his older brother, Obito.
Fate seemed to enjoy playing with him. With all of them, actually.
Sasuke was on the second floor, away from everything and everyone because he couldn't stand being in crowded places for too long. He could handle it, but he didn't enjoy it one bit. Especially in crowded places like the science fair: his parents were there. Itachi was there because, even though he had already graduated from high school, he was on vacation from college and wanted to visit his old school and reconnect with his teachers and other staff. Sasuke didn't want to be around his family; he was at a stage where he found all of them, absolutely all of them, unbearable.
Besides, Sasuke wasn't exactly a teenager with friends.
He used to have many friends in his childhood. But all that had changed with the death of his older brother. Or rather, with his murder. Sasuke's family didn't like to talk openly about it, but that was what had happened to Obito. It had not been an accident or a fatality, it had been something ordered by some criminal who wanted to end the life of Inspector Hatake Kakashi — none other than Obito's alpha at the time. The Uchiha family, however, had done something masterfully and spoke openly: they blamed Kakashi for what had happened. Even ten years after the trauma, they still insisted on it with all the force of the universe.
Because of this, they cut all ties with Kakashi and, consequently, with Sakura. The girl was the daughter of the couple's best friend — Rin — who had also passed away, but fourteen years ago. Obito decided to adopt her without hesitation, and Kakashi agreed with his partner. Sakura and Sasuke had always been best friends. In fact, it had lasted six years — but six years since they were both born. And overnight, they were torn from the only reality they knew.
Even so, life went on.
At fifteen, last year, Sasuke revealed himself to be an omega — just like Sakura. Although male omegas are not that common, in the Uchiha family it seemed to be a rule: of the three children, two were omegas: Obito and Sasuke. Itachi was a beta, but that was not a problem. The problem was Sasuke. He wasn't a normal omega like Obito.
He was a recessive omega.
This had been revealed along with the diagnosis, because of the boy's low pheromone emission. They had only discovered his second gender because, as they had a history of other omegas in the family, they decided to check with Sasuke. It turned out that his pheromone emission was so low that it would most likely take Sasuke some time to go into heat. In the meantime, he could live as a beta, and no one would suspect anything. These words were spoken by the doctor to a very concerned Mikoto. Sasuke wished his family would be less concerned about this kind of issue. What was really the problem with being a recessive omega? Even so, he knew his parents were disappointed.
Or rather, he thought they were.
Sasuke felt incomplete. Useless. Why be born an omega if he didn't have the one attribute that really set him apart in that category? It seemed like a joke. A joke of fate.
He wondered what Obito would say if he were alive. He didn't have as many memories of his brother as he would have liked, after all, he was only six when it all happened, but the few memories that lingered in his mind filled Sasuke's chest with tenderness and joy. He knew that Obito was cheerful, optimistic, and lighthearted—unlike everyone else in their family. Sasuke had also read some of Obito's novels: they were all magnificent. His brother was a famous writer and would have achieved even more fame if it weren't for the tragic moment that took his life.
Sasuke's family didn't talk much about Obito — but they did talk about Kakashi, because they had chosen the alpha as the villain of that story ten years ago. Sasuke clearly remembered hearing Fugaku and Mikoto talking in the past about how that “intruder” had ruined everything. That Obito should have agreed to marry someone from the Uchiha lineage, chosen by them, no less — the Uchiha family still followed certain absurdly conservative traditions — but Obito had to go against it. And Kakashi, as they had expected, ruined everything. Not that they wished for their son's death, but they never liked Kakashi: they put up with him because of his son, but that had ended ten years ago.
They forced Sasuke and Itachi to distance themselves from Kakashi and Sakura.
What Sasuke couldn't understand was how they were able to turn their backs on Sakura so coldly. She called Fugaku “grandpa” and Mikoto “grandma” in a cheerful tone of voice that filled their entire house. He remembered seeing his father lift her up in his arms — Mikoto and Fugaku were relatively young to be grandparents, as they had been parents very early on as well, so much so that they had a son, Sasuke, and a granddaughter, Sakura, of the same age — and call her “little pest” clearly in jest. They had been a happy, busy, complete, full family.
But everything changed with Obito's death.
His parents became more closed off. Sasuke, consequently, became more reclusive. He had lost Sakura, and with her, other friends had drifted away as well. He didn't blame anyone, because they were all too young to understand what was really happening to him. Sasuke had Itachi, but his brother had graduated from high school a few years later and moved away. Since then, the younger Uchiha had felt increasingly alone. He had no one to really talk to. As much as his brother cared about him, the distance had inevitably created a gap between them.
Besides, the subject he most wanted to talk about was one that no one he knew would understand. Sasuke had never heard of a recessive omega until he revealed himself as one. His mother tried to talk to him, but she always came up with the same speech:
“We can fix this with the right doctors.”
Sasuke didn't want to feel like a failure that needed to be fixed. He just wanted to understand. And he wanted to understand exactly what that fact changed. Would he release pheromones someday, go into heat, be able to procreate... His family seemed to treat him as if he were sick.
His father's behavior about it was even worse: he never commented. He never mentioned it. He treated it as if it were something terrible, not even worthy of the attention of the Uchiha patriarch.
He was thinking about Fugaku's stern expression when he heard a muffled but familiar voice coming from the music room:
— Hello? Is anyone out there? It's Iruka-sensei! I'm locked in this room!
The boy's heart skipped a beat. He had gone up there to avoid absolutely everyone, and now he found himself in an unusual situation: he was most likely the only one who could help Iruka at that moment.
Iruka was his science teacher and the teacher Sasuke liked the most.
He had never shown it like the other students, like Naruto and Sakura. Naruto was the student most passionate about Iruka, to put it respectfully. It turned out that Iruka had been the first teacher, years ago, to realize that Naruto was being bullied by other students because he had dyslexia. Iruka had first noticed the boy's condition and then realized that some students were picking on him because of it. Despite the stress, the whole process had created a noticeable bond between the two.
Sasuke liked Iruka. He knew he was a beta because of the presentation he always gave to new students on the first days of class. He was funny and explained things very well. But what made Sasuke like Iruka the most was the way he was always willing to listen to the students, playing a role that went far beyond that of a teacher who simply imparts knowledge to his students. He was always a listening ear, an open door to anyone who wanted it. Sasuke had never talked to him, but he had tried a few times.
However, he always gave up before he could.
He felt that not even Iruka-sensei could understand him.
Despite this, it didn't seem fair to leave the teacher locked in the room.
The youngest omega approached the door and, as he got closer, he could hear a conversation on the other side: one voice was definitely Iruka's. The other voice, although familiar, was too muffled for Sasuke to identify with certainty. He couldn't hear everything in its entirety, only a few rather disconnected parts.
— I'm sorry about the incident at the street fair.
— You already apologized, which really wasn't necessary.
— It's not okay. I've had scars for a while, and during that time, because of them, I deprived myself of many things. But I don't want to deprive myself anymore...
Sasuke felt as if he were invading something. But he was already too invested in the conversation to walk away.
The unfamiliar voice grew even quieter, and the boy couldn't hear anything else. He approached the door and leaned against it, pressing his ear against the surface. There was no more conversation. He could hear unintelligible sounds; someone leaning against the door and...
A kiss. Definitely a kiss.
Sasuke's whole face flushed. He was definitely intruding on something.
— ‘Kashi...
The boy's eyes widened. Iruka had said those words, that half-spoken name, as if it were difficult to say at that moment because he was out of breath... And since Sasuke was no idiot, he knew immediately who the person was with the teacher inside the music room.
It was Kakashi. The same Kakashi who had been married to his brother for years, the same Kakashi who was now Sakura's father. Despite his face still hot and red as a pepper, a grimace appeared on his expression. What were they doing in there during Iruka's working hours? And why?
Sasuke wanted to end it right then and there. And that's exactly what he did: he didn't hesitate to open the door and take a step back as the two adults fell to the floor at his feet, frightened. They sounded even more frightened when they saw him there, staring at them.
The boy put his hands in his pockets and shrugged.
— No need to thank me — he said casually, as if a thousand thoughts weren't running through his head right now. He knew Kakashi had the right to have other people after Obito, but Iruka-sensei? And at school, of all places? They weren't acting like adults, but like idiots. Both Kakashi and Iruka were a mess: hair all over the place, irregular breathing, swollen lips, dilated pupils, and wide eyes.
— S-Sasuke, we... — Iruka began to justify himself after getting up, running his hands over his clothes as if cleaning invisible dirt from the fabric. — We were just picking up some boxes that Kurenai-sensei requested and the door got stuck. Thank you very much.
— Uh-huh, sure. — The boy's tone was more acidic than he would have liked. Iruka and Kakashi exchanged a nervous glance. Kakashi cleared his throat; of everyone there, he was the one who knew least what to do. He looked like he wanted to bury his face in the floor. Not just his face, but his whole body, if possible. Unfortunately, it wasn't.
Kakashi couldn't process that it was really Sasuke who had caught them. Of all people, it had to be Obito's younger brother. It could have been worse: it could have been Hiruzen or Mikoto, or maybe Sakura herself. But Sasuke...?
Kakashi was wondering why it had been Sasuke when, in fact, there was no possible explanation. It was chance in its most radical sense — it was once again fate showing how it could and wanted to play with them.
— I, well, I'll take those boxes. For Kurenai. She must need them. — And that was the solution the alpha came up with for the situation. Both Iruka and Sasuke stared at him, incredulous and silent, as he entered the room and hurriedly left carrying the two boxes.
Leaving the teacher to deal with Sasuke alone.
Good luck, Iruka.
It was with this thought that the silver-haired man returned to the fair. Kurenai immediately recognized Kakashi in the crowd with the boxes, balancing them with some difficulty due to the time he had already spent carrying them. She hurried over to him, with two students at her side.
— Thank you so much, Kakashi! — The woman thanked him with her hands clasped in front of her while the students took the boxes to help the police officer and moved away to set up the last details of the stand. — Where's Iruka?
— We ran into Sasuke.” I think the two of them are talking upstairs...
— With Sasuke? That's news. He doesn't talk much. — She narrowed her eyes at Kakashi. — Why do I feel like you're hiding something?
— Me, hiding something? You're imagining things. Let's go see your students. — He quickly dismissed the idea, although it didn't really work for Kurenai. But since she needed to instruct the students, she turned to walk over to the boys' booth. Kakashi followed her, his hands in his pockets and his nerves definitely calmer. He was still processing the fact that he and Iruka had kissed. And not only that: Kakashi had made all his feelings clear. He had infested Iruka with his pheromones and made him repeat that he would not rely on anyone else in that process of stabilizing his heat, only Kakashi. He wanted to be the only one in Iruka's mind, both in that sense and in terms of feelings. Yes, exactly that.
Especially since Iruka was the one who had been inhabiting Kakashi's mind from the first moment they saw each other.
However, he couldn't stay with Sasuke for long. The boy was the spitting image of Mikoto, and Kakashi was still a little sensitive about what the Uchiha thought of him, given recent events. As much as he knew he had acted like a coward, it would only have made things worse if he had stayed. And Iruka was smart, he would be able to get around that situation.
He was watching Shikamaru, Shino, and Kiba's presentation of their now-finished booth when Mizuki knelt down next to Kakashi, holding a clipboard identical to Iruka's. The same arrogant tone as before filled the older alpha's ears:
— You are Hatake Sakura's father, aren't you? Congratulations on her project. It's definitely the best of them all.
Kakashi took a moment longer to answer, looking him up and down from the corner of his eyes.
— Hm. Yes. Thank you very much. — He couldn't imagine that guy dating Iruka, honestly. Mizuki was so different from Iruka; not that Kakashi thought he was similar to the omega, but Mizuki didn't seem like the type of person who would treat Iruka the way he deserved. So much so that Kakashi, despite not knowing him, knew that he had been terrible to the teacher. That was enough to get on his nerves.
— Are you close to Iruka? — The unusual question made Kakashi turn to the other man, frowning.
— Shouldn't you be evaluating the students' projects? — The policeman's response was automatic. Mizuki raised his eyebrows.
— That's what I'm doing. — I was just wondering why you went to get those boxes by yourselves... And he hasn't come back. Is he okay?
— Yes, he is. He stayed upstairs to talk to a student. He'll be back soon. — A pause. Mizuki stared at the students presenting now, but made no notes. — Where do you know Iruka-sensei from? — He looked back at Kakashi with the question, a smile that could almost be polite.
— University. When he started his doctorate, I was finishing mine, with the same advisor. — He replied promptly, as if he had been expecting someone to ask him that at any moment.
— Interesting. Iruka never mentioned his doctorate... Or you. — Kakashi couldn't pass up the opportunity.
— Ah, Iruka isn't one to talk about his achievements. — The answer, also prompt, made Kakashi want to roll his eyes. So, this man considered himself an achievement in Iruka's life? How pathetic. — Are you two close, then?
— I'd say a little. — The alpha shrugged, his attention already back on the students' presentation. Mizuki didn't like the answer, even though he had asked, and he didn't want to prolong the conversation with Kakashi, since he wouldn't give any answers about Iruka.
— I'm going to look for some coffee. It smells pretty strong in here... — The researcher said aloud, walking away. Kakashi knew that smell was coming from himself. It was Iruka's pheromones impregnated in his skin and clothes after the brief moment they had in the music room; pheromones that Mizuki was not at all used to. Although he was not a man to claim victory, a satisfied smile appeared on the police officer's face after Mizuki left.
Meanwhile, Iruka stared at Sasuke as he thought about what he could possibly say to the boy to break the ice. Until his brain cells finally decided to work:
— Were you running away from the science fair?
Sasuke, who until then had been feigning a serious pose to judge the teacher, completely dropped his expression of superiority in favor of disbelief.
— What? No, I—
— I know very well that you were running away, Sasuke Uchiha. And I think you'd better have an explanation, because your whole family, including your brother, is downstairs waiting to see you.
— They're definitely not here for that.
— Then why else would they come?
— To see anyone else but me. Someone who brings them pride, or someone they can imagine in my place, like a prodigal son. Maybe someone more like Itachi.” — Or Obito. But the words didn't come out.
Iruka smiled sadly, but he didn't look sorry. He didn't think it was fair that someone as young as Sasuke judged himself so harshly.
— Sasuke-kun — the teacher said affectionately. — They're proud of you. They're your parents and your brother...
— You wouldn't understand.
— How about you explain it to me? Maybe then I can understand. Or just... listen. — Sasuke met his brown eyes, that empathetic and genuine sparkle that made anyone lower their defenses. The boy found himself with no way out, so as he stared at the teacher, he nodded. — Great. Why don't we sit on the stairs?
Sasuke agreed once again. They sat side by side on the stairs, and the boy even forgot that he had caught the teacher with Kakashi in the music room as he forced himself to organize all his thoughts. He hugged his knees and tucked his chin between them as he stared at his own feet. He could feel the teacher's gaze on him, a kind of gaze that didn't pressure him, but said something like, “I'm here to listen. You can start when you're ready.” It conveyed a warmth that Sasuke longed to feel.
That's why he had no trouble starting to talk.
— I remember being a happy child, very talkative even. But everything changed with the death of my brother, Obito. You've probably heard the story, and I don't really feel like repeating it. — Iruka nodded. He didn't know the details, but he wasn't going to ask the boy, even though he was honestly dying of curiosity. — My parents took me away from Sakura and Kakashi overnight. They were my best friend and my... I called him uncle, even though he was my brother's husband, but that was because of the age difference. It was always nice to have them around, I even have some memories with Sakumo, Kakashi's father. Our house, when they were around, was colorful, noisy, and... Alive. — Sasuke paused. He didn't even know he had so many words to say on the subject. — I was so... so hurt by all of this that I closed myself off. From my family, from my friends. Because of that, I lost not only Sakura, but everyone. Because of that, I've felt isolated to this day. Everything got completely worse with the discovery of my second gender. — Sasuke shrugged. — I'm an omega, Iruka-sensei, but I couldn't even be born as a normal omega. The doctor told me that I'm a type of omega called recessive...
Iruka's heart skipped a beat.
—...And of course my parents think I'm a failure. Obito was an omega, but a normal one. Itachi is a beta, so this kind of concern doesn't affect him. My mother treats it like it's a disease, but all that changes is that I'll have my cycles later, in addition to pheromones that are not yet emitted with a defined stability. And I... I don't have anyone my age to talk to about it. All I wanted was someone to talk to, but I can't get close to anyone else. Sasuke finally looked at the teacher, his eyes watering. But even in crowded places, I can't stay...
— Sasuke, it's okay. — Iruka waited a moment to say those words. He knew Sasuke was more reserved, but that didn't stop him from breaking the short distance between them with a hug. The boy didn't mind. He returned the gesture, allowing himself to feel the warmth and welcome that the teacher so easily exuded. — It's okay to feel that way. You feel alone, but you're not. — He whispered, trying to sound as kind and gentle as possible. — And it's okay to be a recessive omega. Some people need a specific amount of time to “bloom”...
— But things are harder that way...
— It may be. But there's nothing wrong with you, dear. — The two respectfully broke their embrace to face each other again. — Your family loves you just the way you are. You may not understand exactly how each other feels, but you're still family.”
— It sounds so easy when you put it that way...
— I know it's not easy. But it's not impossible. And as for your friends, I think you're closing yourself off too much, Sasuke. I know it's not voluntary. That you created this way of protecting yourself after all the trauma, but it's not healthy to isolate yourself like this. And everyone likes you very much, especially Sakura. She's always trying to get closer to you...
— But what if she doesn't like who I am now?
— She will, Sasuke. First, you need to let her get to know the new you. And you'll have to force yourself to let her, because isolating yourself has become second nature to you. That happens when we have an emotional block...
— I can try. — The boy shrugged. — Thank you, sensei. — Iruka could have told Sasuke that he himself was a recessive omega, but he didn't want to make the conversation about himself. He wanted the boy to identify with him, but not at that point. Although he always helped his students, he knew how to maintain the fine line between professional and personal.
— Shall we go back to the fair? I need to evaluate your booth, don't I?
— Yes. Karin must be frantically looking for me... — Iruka chuckled as he stood up.
— That's just like her. — While agreeing with his teacher, Sasuke felt a lightness in his chest that he hadn't had the pleasure of feeling in a long time. A lightness that definitely made him think of hope, of better days, of days more like his childhood.
{...}
[Me] [11:47 p.m.]: Mizuki, I've changed my mind. We don't need to mix personal and professional. Let's keep the relationship as two fellow researchers, okay?
[You have blocked this number]
{...}
[Me] [11:50 p.m.]: Hi, Kakashi-san.
[Me] [11:52 p.m.]: How about going out on Friday night? Are you available? As... Our first official date?
[Me] [11:53 p.m.]: I'll choose. And I'll pay, to repay you for everything you've already done for me.
{...}
[Kakashi] [6:27 a.m.]: Whatever you say, Ru.
{...}
— So... That's all that happened? — Iruka nodded at Genma's question as he picked up food from his plate with his chopsticks. — Iruka, you've dumped more information on me than there are words in the Bible. This is absurd. You... I don't even know where to start!
— You've barely touched your lunch — Iruka observed, as if they were just talking about the most trivial subject in the world.
— How could I?! I just found out that you're an omega, after all these years, and on top of that, you're involved with a cop I've never heard of until today! And you kissed him at school! And you were caught by the student who happens to be the brother of the cop's ex-husband? And Mizuki? You still sent him a message, because even though he's considered the best student in the department, he's dumber than a door.
— That hurt.
— It was supposed to hurt. You sent Mizuki a message. After everything he made you feel...
— Are you really going to start with Mizuki?
— Yes. Because it was an incongruous attitude.
— I blocked him.
— I know. But you still sent him a message. You even considered asking him to be your sexual partner and... Wow, Mizuki knew you were an omega and I didn't. That really hurt.
— I had to tell him, he was my boyfriend...
— And I've always been your best friend. Okay, not always. But since that class we took together in grad school...
— I'm sorry, okay? Can we focus on the other information I told you?
— Yeah, sure. Mizuki isn't even the most interesting part, but it really hurt me.
— I'm sorry, Genma.
— Buy me a beer next time we go to the bar and I'll reconsider
— Noted.
— Great. — Genma finally started eating the food on the plate in front of him. They were having their usual Friday lunch, and Iruka decided it was time to update his friend on everything that was going on. And when he thought about everything, he really meant everything. Genma realized that he knew a very niche part of Iruka's life, but now there were definitely no more secrets between the two friends. — What I don't understand is... Why are you so afraid to talk about your feelings with Kakashi?
— Well... — Iruka shrugged. — He lost his partner. He still suffers from it, after all, who wouldn't? Apparently, his death was horrible. It was sudden. His life and his daughter's changed drastically because of it.
— Yes, that's clear. But he's been so transparent with you, Iruka. He confessed it to you. He asked for patience, he apologized. He's trying to build a bond with you, despite the trauma. He can't erase that part of his history, but he's telling you everything because he wants to... He wants to be with you.
— But, Genma, what if he's feeling pressured because of my condition...?
— First, what you have is not a disease. Second, he's a grown man, Iruka. He knows what he wants and what he doesn't want. If he didn't want anything to do with you, he wouldn't be helping you. Sure, your pheromones were activated by him, but he doesn't have to take responsibility for that. Medicine would help you perfectly well, even if the process is technically easier with an alpha, but that's not necessarily his job. He wants to help you, but beyond that, he wants to get to know you. He's been opening up to you, Iruka, but...
— But what, Genma?
— You're the one who isn't opening up, Iruka. — The omega frowned.
— Me? But I...
— Iruka, what does Kakashi really know about you?
— Well, I'm his daughter Sakura's teacher.
— And that says everything about you, Iruka?
— No, but...
— Does Kakashi know that you're one of the best doctoral students at the university? That you received awards during your master's and undergraduate studies? That your GPA is 9.5 even though you've been at the university for over five years?” Does he know that you have an incredible project in development and have participated in several extension projects? Does he know that people in our department compete for your co-supervision? That other professors have tried to steal you away from Orochimaru? That Kabuto is jealous of your charisma and constantly tries to provoke you because of it? Does he know that you are the son of a Brazilian couple who currently live in the interior of São Paulo, but are extremely proud of you? — The more Genma spoke, the less Iruka knew where to hide. — Does he know that you receive emails every day from foreign magazines asking for access to your articles because you write incredibly well? Does he know that you have participated in and coordinated several ecology conferences inside and outside the country? Does he know that you are the biggest nerd there is, a fan of Interstelar, Star Wars, Star Trek, Marvel—
— Okay, I get it! He doesn't know any of that because I didn't tell him.
— And you were trying to tell me that Kakashi doesn't want anything to do with you? The same man who begged you for patience? Who asked you to rely exclusively on him?
— Genma! I told you intimate things, not for you to rub in my face. — Iruka stared at him with a red face, which made his friend laugh.
— I'm sorry. But you needed that reality check, Ru. — Genma shrugged. — You were afraid of him when in fact you didn't even open up your own feelings. The emotional block is all yours.
Iruka sighed, staring at the leftover food on his plate.
— You're right.
— What? I didn't hear you right... — Genma teased.
— Idiot.
— I still didn't hear...
— Idiot. You. Are. Right. — Iruka replied, gritting his teeth.
— I already knew that, but it's gratifying to hear it from you.
— Idiot. — Iruka repeated. — You didn't hear me right, did you? I can repeat it with a smile.
— Oh, no need. — Genma paused. — You're not taking Kakashi out for ramen today.
— Why does that sound like a statement?
— Because you're definitely not going to do that.
— What if that's exactly what I've planned?
— Then I think you're a loser.
— Genma, I'm a doctoral student. I can't afford to eat at fancy restaurants...
— Iruka, it's the first date. And you told me he's rich. Why can't he pay?
— Because he always pays.
— And...?
— I'm not a trophy wife.
— I didn't mean it that way. It's better to make a good impression than take him to Ichiraku.
— What's wrong with Ichiraku? — Iruka raised an eyebrow.
— It's on the same block as your house. Second, no. A big no.
— Oh, okay. I'll take him to a fancy place, one that suits your taste.
— Thank you very much. — Genma breathed a sigh of relief. — I hope your first official date today goes well.
Iruka took a deep breath.
— Thank you... — He paused. — Me too.
{...}
To say that Iruka was nervous was an understatement.
He was almost eating not only his nails, but his own heart — if he had the ability to rip the organ out with his hands, he would have done so long ago.
He had agreed to meet Kakashi at a renowned Japanese restaurant. He had made the reservation the day before and sent the alpha a message with the address, also telling him to take a taxi or Uber, because he wanted to share a bottle of wine with him that night. Kakashi had accepted, just as he had quickly accepted the invitation to the official meeting.
Just thinking about it made his stomach churn.
He was so anxious that he arrived fifteen minutes before the appointed time. And he spent those fifteen minutes thinking about so many possibilities that he didn't notice the time passing, let alone when the alpha arrived and stood next to him, who was sitting at the table designated for them.
— Iruka?
Kakashi's familiar voice filled his ears and the omega jumped in his chair before turning to him.
— I didn't mean to scare you, I'm sorry. — The alpha smiled warmly, while Iruka lost himself in the sight of him.
Kakashi was simply stunning.
He looked like he had stepped straight out of a men's fashion magazine, although everything about him remained typically discreet and sober — as if he wasn't really trying to impress anyone, which only made it all the more dangerous. He wore a black turtleneck, finely knitted and tight-fitting, which perfectly outlined his broad shoulders, defined arms, and narrow waist. The fabric shimmered subtly under the restaurant's lighting, highlighting the elegant contours of his torso. His straight-cut, creased lead-colored dress pants fell impeccably to a pair of black matte leather Chelsea boots. On his wrist, he wore only a silver-faced watch — the only accessory necessary. His hair was slightly tousled to the side, still with that messy touch that seemed impossible to tame. He looked sculpted by the night: effortlessly elegant, irresistibly unpretentious.
Iruka had to hold his chin with enormous mental effort.
— H-hi, Kakashi. — He forced himself to speak as he stood up. The two greeted each other with a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek; a reflex from Iruka that came too quickly.
Kakashi obviously didn't mind.
— You look beautiful — the alpha complimented as he took his place in front of Iruka, which elicited an awkward smile from the brunette.
— Thank you. — He was wearing a light, flowing teal crepe shirt, the collar open enough to reveal his neckline and the top of his collarbone. The long sleeves ended in buttoned cuffs, and part of the shirt was slightly tucked into his pants, with a high waistband that accentuated his slim waist and defined hips. The omega tried to act natural in response to the compliment, as if he hadn't spent two hours choosing the ideal outfit. — You look amazing too.
— I try to be on your level. — Iruka rolled his eyes at the comment.
— Kakashi... — He whispered.
— Iruka... — The two made eye contact that was far too dangerous. Iruka moistened his lips and then slid a menu toward the man, breaking the brief tension.
— Have you been here before? — Kakashi shook his head as he glanced at the dishes.
— No, but it looks great. I trust your taste, Iruka-sensei.
Before Iruka could respond, a waiter appeared with a small ice bucket containing a bottle of wine. It was the bottle Iruka had ordered when he arrived, and he had asked for it to be brought when his companion arrived. The man greeted them both and served them red wine.
Although it was an attempt to appear chic, Iruka also saw the drink as an opportunity to let loose. He needed it.
The two took a short sip and enjoyed the taste of the drink on their tongues.
— Definitely dry — Kakashi pointed out, which elicited a chuckle from Iruka.
— How are you, Hatake-san?
— I'm fine. Especially now, Iruka-sensei. — The two took advantage of the waiter's interruption and had already placed their orders as well. Kakashi rested his elbow on the table and his face in his hand, smiling crookedly at the teacher. — And you?
— Fine. Nervous, I confess...
— Why? You already know me...
— In part...
— In part? — Kakashi frowned.
— Okay, not exactly that. I know we've gone out a few times, but today was the official date. So that made me nervous, because I realized that you... — He was gathering the courage to speak. — You've always been transparent with me, Kakashi. And I hardly ever said anything, I just waited for you to show me what you wanted. — Iruka smiled weakly — I know I'm rushing things too soon after we met, but I also want you to trust me. Not just in this process of pheromones and everything else, but in general. Because I also want to invest in what we're building.
Kakashi smiled even wider. Damn, Iruka was adorable.
— Thank you, Iruka-sensei. — The two smiled at each other. The alpha took another sip of wine. — How did the conversation with Sasuke go that day? — The question cut through the moment of vulnerability, but elicited a laugh from Iruka.
— Oh, are you asking how I got along after you abandoned me?
— Well, exactly that.
— It was fine. Sasuke just wanted someone to talk to. Someone to listen to him. I think that makes a difference in his daily life. — He wasn't going to give details of his conversation with Sasuke. — He misses Sakura a lot, too. But that's all I'm going to say. — Kakashi blinked, surprised.
— He misses her?
— Yes. Very much.
— What happened between the families was very delicate. — Kakashi shrugged. — But I don't blame the Uchiha for distancing themselves.
— Kakashi... We don't have to talk about it, but even though I'm an outsider, I don't think what they did to the children was very fair.
The alpha sighed.
— I think it's a delicate subject. — He didn't want to talk about it, and Iruka immediately understood that he was touching on very sensitive ground.
— I'm sorry. — Kakashi muttered that there was no need for him to apologize. — My family is very small, so I've never had the experience of a large family.
— Neither have I. When I was a child, it was just me and my father. — Kakashi smiled sideways. — Your parents aren't Japanese, are they? You mentioned that.
— Yes. They're Brazilian, and they moved back to Brazil a while ago.
— Have you been there?
— Every summer I go. They live on the coast, so I love to enjoy the beach... — The image of Iruka in swim trunks filled Kakashi's mind, which was a great relief.
— I can imagine. — The comment elicited another giggle from the omega. — I've never been to Brazil.
— We can arrange that, Hatake-san.
A waitress interrupted the conversation to serve some platters with pieces of sashimi and sushi. The two picked up their chopsticks to start eating, the conversation still flowing lightly and naturally between them.
— What are your parents like, Iruka?
— They're great. — The omega replied after chewing and swallowing. — My mother is a journalist, and my father is a historian. I think I'm a lot like both of them, or rather, a mixture of the two. My mother has always been concerned with understanding everyone as best as possible, and my father is very creative. He loves to talk. He could spend hours and hours talking about Brazilian historiography. Like, it's the way history was written. It's a boring subject that hurts, but he loves it. The longing was clear in his tone of voice. — I miss them a lot sometimes, but Tokyo is my home.
— Do they come to visit you too?
— It's a little more difficult, but not impossible. You would like them.
— I'm sure I would.
— What about your father, Hatake-san? You mentioned him earlier.
— He definitely looks like me. Some people have said that we are carbon copies of each other, both in appearance and mannerisms. I don't think I have much new to say about him... Oh, he is absolutely in love with Sakura. To him, she is the treasure of his life.
— That's very beautiful.
— Yes. She loves him very much too.
A comfortable silence settled between the two, who now focused on eating for a few moments. Kakashi was the one who broke the silence.
— Iruka... — The teacher stared at him when he mentioned his name. — Forgive me if I'm being intrusive, but I want to ask you about something from your past. After you left that dinner at Kurenai and Asuma's house, I ended up asking her more about your past relationships, and she mentioned Mizuki. He's the same alpha from the science fair, isn't he?
Iruka took a moment longer than necessary to respond.
— Yes... — He sighed heavily. — He was my only relationship, actually. But it was terrible. — When he looked Kakashi in the eye again, the gleam in his irises asked: “Why?” — He was one of the first people outside my family that I told about being an omega. And he... He treated me like I was defective. I mean, the beginning of our relationship was wonderful. He was a different person, and I believe he would have remained so if I had never told him the truth. If I had continued to be just a beta... But I couldn't lie to him. So I told him, and he started talking about how I would never be able to have children like normal omegas, or go into heat, or spend his rut with him... So I decided to break up with him. — Iruka shrugged, as if it had been simple and easy. — He didn't accept it right away, but I turned my back on him. And he moved out soon after, so it turned out to be easy after all.
— I'm sorry, Iruka — Kakashi said, the words coming from the bottom of his heart.
— It's okay now. I've been through worse. — Iruka unconsciously ran his fingertips over the scar on his face. More dishes arrived, more wine glasses were emptied and refilled, and the teacher was feeling more and more comfortable because of the effect of the alcohol, which was totally welcome in his system. Kakashi was already more resistant to alcohol, so he remained sober. — Is Sakura home alone?
— No, Iruka — Kakashi replied with a chuckle. He was smiling at the teacher the whole time, especially now: his cheeks had turned slightly red from the wine in his system. — She's at my father's house today.
— That's great. — Kakashi laughed again, and Iruka narrowed his eyes at him. — What?
— Nothing. You're cute.
— Kakashi...
— Iruka...
— Stop it.
— Stop what?
— Imitating me every time I say your name.
— Why? Does it bother you?
Iruka's delayed response made Kakashi feel delighted. He bit the corner of his mouth lightly, staring at the omega's flushed face — it was gratifying to tease Iruka. The conversation flowed well, as did the rest of the evening. Kakashi discovered that Iruka loved science fiction movies, and not just those, but movies in general. His favorite movie was Interstelar, but at times he said his favorite movie was Donnie Darko — the question of time was something that interested the omega. Iruka also loved matcha tea, as well as cakes in general. This was great information for Kakashi to memorize. Iruka also discovered that Kakashi loved to exercise — which was obvious from his body — and do puzzles. Kakashi also liked to wake up early, very early, in fact. Iruka, even though he was a teacher, hated waking up early. And every day he had to get up early for his classes at school; and teaching was one of the things he loved most in the world. He didn't like to exercise much; he definitely fell into the sedentary category. The two complemented each other in unusual ways, as if fate were really playing little tricks on them, even in aspects of their personalities.
By the end of the night, Iruka was much more relaxed.
And Kakashi paid the bill, but he didn't mind it one bit.
The two walked out of the restaurant, Kakashi letting the younger man lean on him so he wouldn't lose his balance, which was scarce at the moment. The alpha rested one of his elongated hands on the base of his spine as he guided him. Once they were outside, he took his cell phone out of his pocket to call an Uber.
Iruka pressed his body against Kakashi's to protect himself from the cold, and the alpha had to make a huge mental effort to stay focused on the task of calling Uber. He entered Iruka's home address and stared at the screen. The driver would arrive in three minutes. He turned his face to look at the omega now up close: he was glowing, even with his flushed face. An involuntary smile appeared on Kakashi's lips, his eyes naturally half-closed, almost shut. Iruka returned the gaze, the two of them nestled in front of the sushi restaurant on a starless night in Tokyo. Kakashi was elegant and chic as always, in contrast to Iruka's youthful and more casual style.
They matched. Very well.
Iruka, his senses blurred, could feel Kakashi's pheromones and warmth embracing him. Analyzing his face with his head raised due to the difference in height between the two, the omrga concluded once again without much difficulty that Kakashie was the most beautiful man in the whole world. His heart was pounding in his chest. He was feeling an absurd urge to declare his love for this man who looked more like a monument and should certainly be listed as a world heritage site.
— Kakashi... — The words began to come out before he even thought about it. — I love you.
The alpha's eyes widened.
The world around Iruka seemed to stop as he realized what he had just said, or rather, the thought that had suddenly escaped him. Iruka's face became hot and red with embarrassment, and no longer from the drink. He sobered up a little in an instant.
— I-I mean, I... I like you! That's what I meant! — The omega moved away from him a little, gesturing exaggeratedly with his hands. — I don't love you! Not yet! Not that I'm counting on it, and not that I can't love you, but it's too soon, I just said it without thinking, without any pretension, because I'm stupid and an idiot—
Kakashi interrupted him with a loud, booming laugh. He threw his head back, his hands on his abdomen as he laughed — the most sincere and delightful laugh he had ever heard from that man.
Iruka fell more in love with him at that moment, even though he was dying of embarrassment.
— Iruka... — Kakashi wiped the corners of his eyes. He had cried from laughing so hard. — It's okay, dear. I like you too. — Before Iruka could react, he hugged him around the waist and kissed him gently. The omega melted in his arms, slowly calming down after his embarrassment.
Unfortunately, their Uber arrived quickly.
They got into the car and remained silent during the trip. Kakashi by the window, Iruka in the middle, leaning against the alpha, his head resting on his shoulder. Kakashi stared at the street through the window with a small smile, the scene of Iruka saying “I love you” repeating itself in a loop inside his head. It had made him happier than it should have, honestly.
It didn't take long to get to Iruka's house. Kakashi accompanied him to the apartment door, but Iruka didn't open it right away. He didn't want that night to end, he didn't want Kakashi to leave, so he prolonged the moment of unlocking the door as long as he could. As soon as he opened it and made a move to step inside, he turned to the alpha behind him: tall, handsome, polite, perfect in every way — and pulled him inside with a kiss.
Kakashi staggered inside, closing the door behind him with one hand before hugging Iruka around the waist. The two walked inside, not even bothering to take off their shoes. Iruka walked backwards, his mouth still pressed against Kakashi's, already open, searching for his tongue, until he reached the sofa and fell there, feeling all the delicious weight of the alpha on top of him. Chibi, fortunately, was sleeping soundly curled up in her room, completely oblivious to what was happening in the living room.
— Sleep here tonight... — Iruka asked the second their mouths parted, and Kakashi nodded. — Please...
— Whatever you want. — He accepted the request even before the teacher begged, because it wasn't even necessary, and went back to kissing him. The heat between them increased, and their combined pheromones now danced throughout every room in the apartment. Kakashi squeezed every part of Iruka he could with affection and reverence, just as Iruka ran his fingertips along the contours of the police officer's well-defined muscles. But both were aware that they would not cross that line that night, not with Iruka not completely sober.
Kakashi rolled to the side, falling off the sofa with the omega on top of him. They both laughed at the impact, which wasn't much because the sofa was low. Kakashi sat on the floor, pulling Iruka onto his lap by his thighs. The teacher's body was composed of curves that could make the silver-haired man commit the most unthinkable follies; none of his erotic readings had prepared him for what that omega made him feel.
The two continued kissing, entwined with each other, until they decided to go to the bedroom. Kakashi carried Iruka to the bed, and Chibi, despite being upset and jealous, shared the bed with the couple, who took off their shoes before lying down and slept in each other's arms, without even taking a shower. That night, they couldn't think of anything like that, too intoxicated by both the smell and each other's company — both feeling a happiness at being with someone they hadn't felt in a long, long, long time.
Notes:
Hi!
I apologize for the delay.
This past week has been crazy. I'm traveling tomorrow, so I had to get a lot of things ready. I also started a new job (no more unemployment, yay!) as an English teacher! I admit that writing this fic in English gave me enough courage to apply for the job (and I got it!). Besides that, I had to talk to all my college professors because I'm graduating and some of them hadn't released the grades yet, which could have prevented me from graduating. I was so anxious!!!!!!!Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter, hehehehe
but don't think the drama is over....PS: I was rewatching that movie “The Parent Trap” and I searched for fanfics inspired by it, found an Eruri (Levi and Erwin from AOT) and started thinking about a Kakairu fic inspired by that movie! It would be just PERFECT. The two as a divorced couple (both totally DILFs) with TWO children... ugh, bye, I love them!!!!!! Imagine that scene in the ELEVATOR where Kakashi is completely overwhelmed when he sees Iruka after 11 years... I felt sick. I love a man BEGGING to be loved by a specific person. I absolutely love men yearning...!!!!
Kisses, see you next time! I'll try not to take so long, hehe!!
Chapter 14: Hopes
Summary:
Iruka needs to deal with his "romantic past" one last time.
Notes:
enjoy <3
song: Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want - The Smiths
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
So, please, please, please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me get what I want this time
When Kakashi woke up the next day, without an alarm clock and, for the first time in a long time, after five in the morning, he noticed two weights on his body. The first was Iruka, nestled on his chest like a kitten, and the second was a real cat, Chibi, curled up on his feet, providing more than pleasant warmth. Kakashi's heart was immediately flooded with a warmth that had nothing to do with temperature, but rather with a pleasant feeling that he hadn't felt in many years for anyone outside his family.
Kakashi soon discovered that Iruka slept like a log.
He moved under the teacher, with one arm around his waist and definitely numb — but he couldn't care less about that. Iruka gave off the now familiar smell of coffee, but it was very mild at that moment. Kakashi slid out from under him, letting the teacher snuggle up alone in bed. Chibi was the one who actually grumbled, nestling between Iruka's legs. Kakashi adjusted the blanket at his shoulders and got up, still smiling without showing his teeth. They were both wearing last night's clothes. The alpha could still feel his mouth a little swollen from the kisses they had exchanged for what must have been a few hours — not that his sense of time was very good at moments like this. The cop was feeling like a teenager again, at forty. He wanted to feel pathetic, but it was refuted every time he looked at Iruka, because he was beautiful.
Drop-dead gorgeous.
Silently, and under Chibi's watchful eye, the alpha left the bedroom and went to the kitchen, his footsteps softer than a ninja's. In fact, he first made a quick stop in the bathroom to rinse his mouth with mint mouthwash, which, luckily, Iruka had, because no one deserves morning breath. Then he carefully observed the room in which Iruka prepared — or didn't prepare — his meals. It was a small kitchen, but extremely practical and complete. Kakashi's eyes noticed every detail, but he lingered on the refrigerator: there were a series of kitty magnets and shopping lists scribbled in clearly hurried handwriting. A smile inevitably spread across the alpha's face as he looked at each of the magnets and imagined Iruka putting them up on different occasions. In addition to that feline decoration, there was also a calendar on the opposite wall with a sleeping cat representing each month. Kakashi approached and could read the scheduled meetings, as well as the birthdays of students throughout the year: Sakura, Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Ino, Hinata... They were all there, in lovely handwriting and with specific emojis accompanying each name.
His heart skipped a beat. Iruka was adorable in everything he did.
— Kakashi?
As if materializing there from the police officer's thoughts, Iruka's voice filled the room. Kakashi turned to find the teacher with his face swollen from recent sleep, his hair tied in a clumsy bun, and his clothes wrinkled from the night before.
— For a moment I thought you had left... — Iruka chuckled softly, trying not to sound as nervous as he truly was. — But you're here.
— Good morning, Iruka-sensei. — Kakashi practically purred the words as he approached him, taking a few steps in the small kitchen space. — I just woke up too...
— Good morning — Iruka replied softly, standing still as he let the alpha approach. The silver-haired man then moved closer, closing the distance between them and holding the smaller man's hands gently. — Did you sleep well...? — The omega was unable to hide the slight tone of confusion in his voice.
— Like an angel. — Kakashi brought his hands to his mouth and kissed the tips of his fingers delicately, making Iruka blush at the unusual gesture. — I had the great privilege of waking up with you nestled against me... — That was more than enough to make Iruka turn the color of a tomato. Kakashi took advantage of his awkward silence to hug him around the waist. — And you?
Iruka still wasn't sure if any of this was real, even though he could feel Kakashi's rigid, firm body against his own.
— Very well, t-too... Why don't you take a shower while I make us some coffee? — The idea quickly popped into Iruka's head, who smiled awkwardly, feeling his heart racing inside his chest like a race car. Kakashi was too close; the two had slept together once before, of course, last night, but that didn't mean Iruka was used to it. He could see every little detail of the alpha so close now, especially that little mole on his chin that Iruka found one of his greatest charms...
— I'd love to. — Kakashi pressed Iruka gently against him as he replied — But I was thinking of making coffee for us myself...
— No. — Iruka cut him off and smiled awkwardly again, realizing that he had been too abrupt. — I mean, you're my guest today. Not that I can cook like you, but I think I can make the best blackberry jam toast you'll ever taste. — Kakashi let out a low chuckle.
— I have no doubts. — The silver man's eyes went from his eyes to his mouth in less than an instant. Iruka felt a warmth fill his stomach at that look, which was clearly full of ulterior motives. He didn't know what time it was, but he knew it was too early for the perverted thoughts that had taken over his mind...
Kakashi, on the other hand, didn't seem to care.
When their gazes met again, Iruka could see the prurient glint in the silver man's irises. With one glance, he was making it clear how much he wanted Iruka, to feel his mouth, to feel his warmth, his skin... In short: everything. He wanted everything and was able, in some inexplicable way, to convey this to Omega with just one glance. As if he were a puppy begging for Iruka's affection (in lighter terms). Iruka wanted it all, but he didn't have the same capacity for silent communication as Kakashi.
Nevertheless, he kissed the alpha.
Fortunately, Iruka had brushed his teeth before leaving the room. Like Kakashi, he agreed that morning breath was not pleasant — even if he had thought the alpha had left, he had done it just to make sure. Now they were kissing inside Iruka's tiny kitchen. Not even the teacher could have thought of such a homely and, at the same time, delicious scenario. Truly delicious.
Kakashi's mouth was hot, especially when their tongues began to touch. Iruka sighed in mid-gesture, practically melting in the alpha's arms. The older man held him tighter now, completely focused on the gesture. Kakashi really liked not only the difference in height between the two, but the difference in physiognomy too. He was broad, strong, outlined by muscles built up over the years, while Iruka was thin, soft, with curves he had long been dying to explore. He pressed Iruka against him and walked blindly until the omega's body was between Kakashi and one of the benches. The air around them seemed to become dense and, almost immediately, irrelevant. As the kiss progressed, Iruka's lungs began to burn more and more, searching for air that wasn't coming. And he didn't miss it in the slightest, not as long as his mouth was glued to Kakashi's.
The alpha's hands didn't hesitate to invade Iruka's blouse, his slender fingertips touching the brunette's warm, tanned skin. The younger man shivered, automatically letting out a moan against Kakashi's lips. That low sound was more than enough to awaken something in Kakashi that had been dormant - he frowned at the concentration he was putting into the gesture, squeezing Iruka's waist directly with his fingers as he caressed it. Iruka's fingers, previously on Kaakshi's shoulders, moved up to the silver man's hair and entwined themselves in the short strands, pulling them not too hard, but with a reasonable amount of pressure. He then felt Kakashi's hands move dangerously down his hips to his thighs, and the alpha was about to lift the omega to sit him on the bench when the brunette forced himself to break the kiss, panting.
— Kakashi... — He still forced himself to speak, every cell in his body crying out for the alpha. The whole kitchen was filled with Iruka's hitherto controlled pheromones — ...let's go slowly...
— Of course. I'm sorry...
— No, I just... You weren't doing anything wrong, I just... I wanted to make sure...
— It's okay, I was getting carried away too...
— It's still very early... I mean, it's morning — Iruka scratched his throat. Kakashi's hands were still on his thighs, and it would be a big lie to say that he didn't like it. He had slid his hands from the hair to the alpha's chest, and he could feel the powerful heart beating against his left palm. He'd never imagined it could have such an effect on a man like Kakashi: what's more, Kakashi's lips were swollen, his face slightly flushed from lack of air and he was breathing at an irregular pace. The sight was completely erotic.
Iruka needed to take his medication — and that wasn't even an exaggeration.
— Uh-huh. — Kakashi kept agreeing with him, but he hadn't made a single move to move away. — You want me to go...?
— Go take a shower, while I get everything ready here...
— Do I stink? — Kakashi clearly asked in a joking tone, but Iruka's eyes widened, his whole body tensing against the alpha's.
— What? No! Not at all, I love your scent, your scent and your pheromones are absolutely wonderful and I could lose control just with them, it's even happened, but I said I was going to prepare the coffee and I also need to take my medication, so I thought you could take a shower while I prepare everything since the kitchen is tiny, but you can stay in the living room, the bedroom, or wherever you prefer—
Kakashi decided to silence Iruka with a kiss. And it worked, because not only did the teacher stop talking, he relaxed completely. It was at that moment that Kakashi pulled away, and the omega only didn't fall because he was leaning against the bench.
— I was only joking. — Kakashi smiled — I'm quite comfortable here. I'm going to take a long bath, okay?
— Right. — Iruka stared at him like a goofball while Kakashi, his hands now in his pockets, walked away. The omega couldn't explain how he hadn't gotten hard between the legs after all that...
...The situation was different for Kakashi. He was completely exploding between his legs.
Iruka took the medication prescribed by Tsunade and prepared a simple breakfast: a bottle of strained coffee, papaya and watermelon cut into square pieces, bread (from yesterday) and scrambled eggs. Kakashi must have been used to something much more extravagant, but this was the luxury that Iruka could offer. He fed Chibi while waiting for the alpha, who soon appeared after the omega had served the kitten's bowl. He was wearing the same clothes as yesterday, but his face was brighter and his damp hair gave him a more youthful look. Not that Kakashi looked old, he even looked much younger than forty, but he definitely had a lighter, more carefree aura.
Iruka, faced with that sight, felt something between his legs.
Yes, our sensei can also be a complete pervert sometimes.
— Now I'm going to take a shower. — Kakahsi hadn't even said anything and Iruka had already gone to the bathroom. He had sorted out a towel for Kakashi, which he had used and had even laid out neatly in the shower stall, with an impeccable metric that matched Kakashi. Iruka took a quick, cold shower and changed: he put on comfortable denim shorts and a plain navy blue blouse. Something simple, practical and homely. When she finally returned for breakfast, she found Kakashi staring at some copies of the books he had abandoned in the living room. The policeman's gaze immediately went to Iruka as soon as he appeared.
— You could have showered before me. — Iruka didn't fail to notice his eyes roaming up and down his body. That was the first time Kakashi had seen Iruka's legs so naked.
To repeat: he wasn't ready and hadn't properly processed the effect he had on Kakashi.
— But you're a visitor, Kakashi-san...
— You're the master of the house.
— Logic has never been like that.
— Okay, you got me. Shall we have coffee? I waited for you.
— Yes, we will. And you didn't have to, I set everything up so you could start eating...
— I got lost in your books, to be honest.
— Do you like reading?
— Very much. I didn't know these titles... — In the end, Kakashi couldn't help himself and picked up the first one in the pile: a blue-covered book. — This one. Intermezzo. Have you read it?
— Yes. It turned out to be one of my favorite books.
— What's it about?
— In a nutshell: two brothers dealing with their father's bereavement. But the two are estranged from each other... They hardly know each other properly and they're quite different.
— It sounds very good. I was interested...
— I don't usually lend out my books, but maybe lending you one would be a good tactic.
— Maa... Why is that?
— Because then I'll have an excuse to see you. And charge you for returning my book. — Iruka's answer brought a big smile to Kakashi's face. He left the book on the table as he approached the sensei, not holding back and hugging him around the waist once more. Iruka would never have imagined, not in a million years, that Kakashi was a man who appreciated physical contact so much.
— You don't need an excuse to see me, Iruka-sensei...
— I feel more comfortable this way...
— Next time, let's go home and I'll lend you a book.
— Agreed. Shall we set up a book club?
— With you, anything. — Kakashi said the most unthinkable things, establishing deep eye contact with Iruka. He never stuttered: he exuded a self-confidence that would leave any shy person shaking with rage. In Iruka's case, it always made him look absurdly unattractive. And not because he didn't like it, but because he didn't know how to deal normally with a man who looked like something completely made up.
Hatake Kakashi, however, was real. And extremely solid against the professor's body.
Iruka couldn't remember ever sharing such a simple, yet light moment with anyone. It was a Saturday morning. They had woken up without an alarm clock, naturally, after a wonderful night on Friday. Iruka had drunk and said a few things without thinking, but he wasn't beating himself up about it. He was feeling fine. At the same time as he knew he was still getting to know Kakashi, he felt that the two of them already shared something special. That something went beyond the pheromones that brought them together. Beyond the "condition" of both Iruka and Kakashi, as if the two had been married for many years and knew every inch of each other. Iruka knew that he still didn't, but he felt so comfortable around the alpha that it was as if it were already a reality.
They ate in silence, sitting next to each other. The smell of coffee — which didn't come from Iruka, but from the steaming liquid that filled his nostrils — embraced them. Chibi was on the floor, curled up between Iruka's legs. Although she had slept at Kakashi's feet, she still had many reservations about the alpha's presence near his master.
During the meal, Kakashi's cell phone started ringing. He took the phone from his pocket and Sakura's name flashed on the screen. He didn't hesitate before answering, while Iruka remained focused on eating his cut fruit - disguising the fact that he had read his student's name on the display of his cell phone.
— Hi, kiddo? Are you all right?
— Hi, Dad! Good morning! — She sounded cheerful, which made Kakashi automatically relax — Will you pick me up at Grandpa's today? We're going to the movies after lunch, right? You haven't forgotten...
Of course. They had actually arranged to see the latest Superman movie. They would also be joined by the illustrious Naruto.
— I haven't forgotten. Yes, I'll pick you up. Then we'll go home, get ready and pick up Naruto. What do you say we have lunch at that restaurant near the cinema?
— I think that'd be great! I'll let Naruto know! Kisses! — She hung up. The call had been quick and to the point: that's how Kakashi and Sakura were. The alpha put the phone back in his pocket and faced Iruka, who was already looking at him with inevitable curiosity.
— Sorry to answer like this...
— No, it's fine. — Iruka gave him a discreet smile — You seem to be getting on very well...
— Yes. Definitely. — He paused, analyzing the teacher's face. — Thanks to you.
— Not so much...
— Yes, it is. You have to accept that you're incredible, Iruka-sensei. — Kakashi hadn't even begun to lean towards him, and Iruka was already redder than a tomato. — I'll take you to the movies with Naruto. They could go alone, but I think they like my company sometimes. I could even call you...
— ...I think I'd rather keep my love life between us for now. I mean, I don't want to expose myself to my students just yet.
— I figured. And that's fine. — Kakashi wiped the corner of Iruka's mouth with his thumb.
— And today I have lunch with the faculty... — Kakashi was dangerously close and Iruka had lost control of his voice and thoughts. He had let it slip without thinking. Kakashi arched his eyebrows, genuinely interested.
— Lunch, is it?
— Yes. A birthday celebration for one of the department coordinators. I'll have to go...
— I'd love to get to know that part of your life, Iruka-sensei.
Iruka felt his heart skip a beat when their gazes met again.
— Some other day, who knows. — Kakashi smiled at the answer that came out in an absurdly low tone of voice. Chibi then jumped into Iruka's lap at once, forcing the policeman to move away. — Chibi... — Iruka tried to scold her, but ended up petting her back. She purred at him.
— It's all right. She... Doesn't like me very much.
— I think she just likes me.
— That's understandable.
This made Iruka's face heat up once more. Kakashi then stood up and Iruka followed his lead. The two of them cleared the table together, washed and dried the dishes in peaceful, silent harmony. They both felt that farewell was coming, but it didn't seem painful: there was a taste of wanting more. They both knew, they were absolutely certain, that there would eventually be a second time — a second official meeting. Kakashi was already ready to leave: he had picked up all his clothes and the book Iruka had lent him.
— Are you sure you don't want a ride? I can drop you off at home, Kakashi-san...
— Don't worry, I'll order an Uber. — Kakashi smiled as Iruka approached him, the first time the omega had taken the initiative to hug him around the waist. — Now I won't want to leave...
— Then stay. — Iruka joked, trying to sound as cocky as possible and winking exaggeratedly at him. Kakashi knew he was exaggerating, but if one day Iruka really did use that "power" on purpose against him, Kakashi wouldn't be able to say no to the younger omega. Faced with the older man's silence, Iruka denied it with his head — It's a joke. I have an appointment today, and so do you, Inspector. — Iruka stood on tiptoe and left a kiss on his lips: his boldest gesture that morning. — I'll come down with you.
The two of them left the apartment. Kakashi in yesterday's clothes and Iruka definitely more comfortable, in shorts and flip-flops. He waited until the Uber arrived and they exchanged a few discreet caresses during the wait.
— Don't steal my book.
— I would never do that. Until next time, Iruka-sensei. — Kakashi laughed and waved to him before turning towards the car. He got into the vehicle, buckled his seatbelt and stared at Iruka's figure in front of the building, waving at him, a broad smile lighting up his tanned face. Kakashi was absolutely certain, two certainties in fact:
- Iruka was the most beautiful person in the world;
- He never wanted to say goodbye to him again. He wanted it to be the last time.
{...}
— I can't believe you came driving. — Genma sighed as he poured himself a beer, with Iruka beside him, sipping a glass of soda.
— I... I drank with Kakashi yesterday and ended up talking garbage. — The omega explained, shrugging.
— Bullshit. I don't even want to imagine. I only have pure thoughts. — Genma gave him a teasing smile. — How was it, huh, stud? For someone who hasn't been drinking today, you seem very happy...
— Well— Iruka was about to tell them, but they were interrupted by the undeniably noticeable presence of Jiraiya, after a few shots of sake. The huge alpha hugged the two students from behind, slipping his arms around the younger students' shoulders.
— Dear students! — His voice filled not only Iruka's ears, but the entire room. They were in a party space not far from the college: it was quite luxurious, in fact. The department had hired a catering service, and all they had to do was serve the food and drinks. The celebration in question was Professor Danzo's birthday, he was one of the current coordinators of the postgraduate program that Iruka and Genma were part of.
By the way, he (Danzo) was an absolute pain in the ass.
But Iruka had to go, or Orochimaru would fail him. Although it didn't sound very relevant to his advisor, Orochimaru loved social gatherings. He said it was always good to "observe patterns of behavior". Iruka made a mental note now: he could observe a pattern of drunken behavior from Jiraiya.
— And there, sensei... — Genma was the first to break free of the older man's grip. — Have you lost control of your drinking? Already?
— What? I'm absolutely resistant to alcohol! I've never been so sober... — He squeezed Iruka against himself, now the only victim. — Hey, you're not Tsunade. — He glared at the omega with indignation.
— You idiot, I'm here. — The doctor's familiar voice filled Iruka's ears and, to his delight, Jiraiya released him to embrace his wife. She pushed him away with just one hand to hug Iruka, a more than welcome hug this time. — How are you, dear?
— Well done, Tsunade-sama. And you?
— Better now that I've seen you. Hi, Genma. — She waved to the other doctoral student. — Old man, go sit down. You're already drunk! — She put her hands on her waist, reproving Jiraiya with just one look.
— You know I hate to disobey you, love, but Yahiko and Konan have just arrived. I need to talk to them. — Jiraiya's comment got everyone's attention. It wasn't a lie: the red and purple heads entered the room, one cautiously holding the other's hand. Yahiko seemed to want to carry Konan, considering the woman's current state: it turned out that the omega was eight months pregnant.
Yahiko and Konan were mentored by Jiraiya a few years ago, both for their master's and doctorate degrees. The two of them moved to Kyoto after passing public exams to become university professors. They didn't like Danzo very much, but they always liked to visit Tokyo to see their friends, such as Iruka and Genma. Genma had even been in the same class as the two of them, but had delayed his doctorate by a few years and was only just finishing it - or not - now. Between the competition and moving, Yahiko and Konan had married and now, a few years later and with financial stability, they decided it was the right time for the next step: they got pregnant. They would be parents in the next few months to a little girl, but they hadn't yet decided on her name.
Jiraiya, now completely free, had greeted his former mentees and guided Konan to sit at the table reserved for him and Tsunade, where Iruka and Genma were also seated. Iruka hadn't seen Orochimaru or Kabuto yet, but he knew they must be somewhere in the hall. Most likely, they would be near Danzo — the last place Iruka would want to be.
— Hi, everyone... — Konan greeted everyone with waving hands, while each of them, Tsunade, Iruka and Genma, approached and kissed her cheek respectively — I missed you...
— Us too! When was the last time you really came? — Tsunade tried to remember.
— About three months ago. — Iruka replied, still pondering.
— I wasn't that big yet, then. — Konan joked, running her hand over her belly.
— Yes, definitely smaller. — Genma agreed and received a kick to the shin from Iruka that almost knocked him over.
— He's an idiot, don't mind him. — Iruka grumbled and sat down next to her, smiling. — How are you? Beyond thrilled, of course.
— Eager. She's getting closer and closer, Iru.
— I can imagine. Expectations must be really high. Has Yahiko been behaving well?
— No better. — Konan laughed and turned to her husband, still sitting down. — Can I have a glass of juice?
She didn't need to repeat herself.
Tsunade silently observed Iruka's interaction with Konan. She had known him well enough to know that one of Iruka's main dreams was to become a father. She also knew that he had probably thought about conceiving at some point, even though he was an omega recessive. Fortunately, she had good news for the omega.
Even if he didn't know it yet.
The conversation at the table was light, full of laughter and cross comments from Genma, while Jiraiya began to dance with a plate of sushi balanced dangerously in one hand. Iruka laughed, remaining by Konan's side. The doctor waited until the pregnant woman needed to go to the bathroom, and was helped by her more than ready husband.
— Iruka, come with me for a minute? — Tsunade got up and walked over to Iruka, putting her hand on his shoulder. — Before the old man fell on the table with his face in the wasabi.
The omega nodded and got up with her. The two of them walked discreetly across the hall to a quieter side corridor, decorated with old paintings and amber lighting. Tsunade leaned against the wall with a more relaxed posture, but her gaze was objective, the same kind of gaze she used to direct during her common consultations.
— I want to show you something. — She spoke naturally, her arms folded across her chest. The ballroom was still buzzing with voices and music, but they were relatively far away from the noise now. — I've been following your routine exams, you already know that. But also what you asked me... About hormone levels. A while ago, before all the trouble with Kakashi.
Iruka swallowed, but nodded. It was true - for the last few months, Tsunade had been monitoring her hormone and pheromone cycle, especially with the whole situation. But before all this, before Kakashi, Iruka had once asked her if there was any chance of him being fertile because he was an omega. Even if it was an omega that had never worked as an omega, he wanted to be sure... And Tsunade had been frank: at that time, the chances were very low, close to zero.
But everything had changed now.
— The fertility rate has risen to completely functional levels, Iruka. — Her voice was firm, but gentle. Always gentle. — There's nothing "incomplete" about you, understand? Nothing. The tests prove it, if you still have any doubts. I brought them in my bag... — Her voice faded when she looked into the omega's eyes: they were moist, slightly watery.
But the omega blinked, which made them dry up. He was smiling at Tsunade now, and had left the doctor and friend completely speechless. Iruka always managed to surprise people, and he left her even more speechless when he opened his mouth to say:
— Thank you, Tsunade-sama. I really mean it.
She returned his smile, but before she could reply, a commotion from across the hall called out to them.
— Ah, damn. — She rolled her eyes when she saw Jiraiya standing on a chair, making a loud toast. — I'll go and stop that scumbag from throwing up on Danzo's cake. Wait for me here, okay?
Iruka laughed, shaking his head, and watched her walk away with firm, determined steps. He was feeling such a mixture of emotions: he still wanted to see the exams, he wanted to read the words Tsunade had said to him, even though he trusted her completely. He didn't know exactly what he was feeling, but it was a pleasant sensation, as if he were floating.
There was hope for Iruka — for him to have something he had always dreamed of and thought impossible.
He didn't even realize that Mizuki was there. That he had, in fact, been there long enough to hear the last few sentences exchanged. He had been hiding in the back since the moment he saw Tsunade pull Iruka away. Iruka hadn't even known he was going to be at the party: but now it was no surprise, he had always been a bit close to Danzo and, as he was spending a season in Tokyo, it made sense that he would be at a party in his old department.
— That's interesting. — His voice came from behind Iruka's back, low, but with that venomous tone that made the omega's stomach churn. The brunette cringed. — So... You're an omega. What a surprise.
Iruka turned around slowly, at first unable to believe his own ears and eyes afterwards. Mizuki wasn't smiling. But there was something in his gaze - a mixture of shock, contempt and, perhaps, a shadow of triumph. As if an old assumption had just been confirmed.
— And doesn't the world turn around? — Mizuki continued, coming closer than Iruka would have liked. — You kept it from me for a year. Now I understand so much... including why we never made any real plans. I talked about the future, about children... and you just ran away. But apparently the problem wasn't "not being able to". It was just me, wasn't it, Iruka?
Iruka didn't answer right away. His jaw clenched, but he kept his tone calm when he answered. He didn't know how he had found the strength to respond to his ex-boyfriend's attack, but somehow he had. He could be proud of himself later.
— You never really wanted plans. You just wanted someone who fit into your ideal family mold. Someone molded to your alpha expectations. And when I didn't fit, you tried to shrink me... You always tried to hurt me while we were together, Mizuki. — His name sounded like acid on Iruka's tongue.
Mizuki smiled, dry and cynical, without any humor.
— Are you going to tell me that you want children now, Iruka? That anyone will accept that? A "recessive" omega that needs a prescription to remind the body what it is?
Iruka wanted to do a scene from a soap opera: he thought about approaching the man and slapping one side of his face after words as sharp as knives. He didn't look like the same man who had sent him a message saying he was sorry and wanted to meet again. Iruka didn't expect anything different from Mizuki, he knew how manipulative he could be.
However, the slap didn't come. Iruka didn't cry, he didn't even feel like it, his eyes barely stung. He just looked at him, firmly, perhaps more so than Mizuki expected.
— It's not because you were unable to love me that no one else will be able to. — He said, softly.
For a moment, Mizuki seemed at a loss for an answer, because he hadn't expected such self-confidence from someone like Iruka, someone he had actually been able to destroy. But that was in the past, not that Mizuki thought that way. So the alpha just let out a bitter laugh.
— Good luck with that. — And he left.
Iruka stood there for a few seconds, alone, breathing slowly. Then, with his eyes fixed on the window and his breathing returning to normal, he muttered to himself:
— I don't need luck. Not anymore. — He closed his eyes, allowing the avalanche of terrible memories to penetrate his mind. He would feel it all just once more, and after that, he would never again think of Mizuki or anything he stood for.
It was high time he got over it.
Notes:
I DISAPPEARED BUT I'M BACK!
Reason for the delay: I rewrote this chapter about three times because it wasn't turning out the way I wanted it to. I like this latest version, but I may still revise it because I don't know.........
I think it's because I came up with too many plots for this fic (and they're all going to happen, so get ready) and I had a little trouble tying everything together. But it's working out (I think). Please tell me what you think in the comments <3
The next chapter should come out faster this time #DontGiveUpOnMe
Spoiler: the next chapter will just be a flashback of Iruka #staytuned
Chapter 15: Spectrum
Summary:
Iruka needs to remember the past in order to overcome it.
Notes:
Enjoy reading!
In this chapter, the writing is a little “dry,” I don't know if you'll notice... It's a chapter focused on Iruka's flashback with Mizuki, and I had a hard time writing it because I hate Mizuki and I hate making Iruka suffer. Besides, I wanted it to be more direct because Iruka is overcoming all of this #thankgoodness. ALSO, thank you all SO MUCH for the kudos, comments, bookmarks and subscriptions!!!!!!!!! you guys are the best <3<3<3
Music: July - Noah Cyrus
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
You know I, I'm afraid of change
Guess that's why we stay the same
So tell me to leave, I'll pack my bags, get on the road
Find someone that loves you better than I do, darling, I know
'Cause you remind me every day, I'm not enough, but I still stay
Iruka remembered his entire academic career in vivid detail — even though it wasn't exactly long yet, he could say that a lot had already happened by the age of twenty-six. Mizuki was a figure who, unfortunately, was closely intertwined with his career from the very beginning, when Iruka had just entered his master's program and had not even begun the research that would also be the origin of his current doctoral thesis. So, to think about everything he had experienced with Mizuki, he had to remember the first time he was sent to Orochimaru's laboratory, still an unknown at the time — a distant name of an eccentric professor who was constantly the subject of undergraduate gossip.
Three years ago — University of Tokyo
Iruka walked with quick but hesitant steps, his fingers clutching the strap of his backpack tightly, as if it could give him courage. He was nervous, of course. It would be his first day in the lab and, consequently, his first meeting with his advisor. It was his very first day as a master's student; he had recently graduated. In addition, he had been living alone for a few days, as his parents had just returned to their homeland. Iruka had obviously spent his vacation with them on the Brazilian coast, which is why his skin was more tanned than usual, with delicate freckles dotting his face — the result of the miraculous sun he had enjoyed in recent months. In Japan, it would be impossible to get a tan like that, so he always took advantage of it when he visited Brazil.
Professor Orochimaru's laboratory was known for being one of the most rigorous and competitive at the university, but also one of the most prestigious. Orochimaru himself was a respected name in the field of biochemistry, even though his temperament was not known to be the friendliest — he was known as a perfectionist who bordered on obsession, people said. Iruka, however, knew that this opportunity could change his academic life, or rather, set him on an exceptional path with an even more exceptional person. Orochimaru had publications in the most renowned journals, as well as awards and research recognized by government authorities for his contribution to society. Iruka wanted to achieve great things in the academic field, even though he knew he had to keep his feet on the ground and work, study, and get his hands dirty exhaustively. After all, it was only the beginning of his master's degree.
All he needed now was to do everything right, even though nervousness and anxiety were killing him.
He stopped in front of the frosted glass door, where the name of the laboratory was written and, below, in smaller letters, the names of the current students and scholarship recipients. His name was not there yet, but he recognized the door because of the larger name of the advisor. Iruka noticed, with inexplicable attention, the fifth on the list: Mizuki Takagi - Doctorate (3rd year). He took a deep breath and knocked timidly on the door, his knuckles loosely clenched. It almost seemed like he wasn't shaking.
— Come in. — A voice came from inside, slightly amused. If Iruka hadn't known he was about to enter a biology department laboratory, he could have sworn someone was doing something comical inside those walls.
The lab was almost empty, except for a man leaning against the back bench, wearing an open lab coat over a black dress shirt, the sleeves carefully rolled up to his elbows. His silver hair was tied back in a makeshift bun, and his gaze assessed Iruka with an interest that, at first glance, seemed purely professional.
— Umino Iruka, right? — the unknown man asked with a small, confident smile, his eyes still wandering from head to toe over the newcomer, as if investigating an unfamiliar path.
— Y-yes. Pleased to meet you. — Iruka bowed slightly, flashing a shy but charismatic smile. — I'm Professor Orochimaru's new master's student. He asked me to stop by today to get to know the place. By email. — He added the last piece of information as if justifying himself. He felt his heart beating absurdly hard in his chest; he could easily blame it on the intriguing look that man was giving him.
— He left for a meeting with the ethics committee. He told me you were coming... I'm Mizuki. — The alpha finally introduced himself, extending his hand. So he was the owner of that fifth name on the list. Iruka accepted the greeting, feeling his cold but firm fingers. — His doctoral student. We'll probably be sharing a bench for the next few weeks.
— Ah... Right. — Iruka smiled, still a little embarrassed. — Thank you for welcoming me.
— It's always good to have new blood around here. — Mizuki turned and pointed to one of the benches organized with surgical precision. — That one will be yours. You can put your things away. Later I'll show you where the reagents, the refrigerator, the centrifuges are... And the corners that Orochimaru doesn't like us to touch. — He winked at Iruka, which made the younger man blush slightly, still not completely at ease in this new environment.
— He seems... a little intimidating. — Iruka tried to joke, intending to sound relaxed. He failed comically in the role.
— He is. — Mizuki gave a dry laugh. — But he respects competence. — The alpha shrugged, already definitely familiar with Orochimaru's peculiar behavior. The truth was that it was quite easy to work with him.
There was a moment of comfortable silence. Mizuki turned back to him, arms crossed, still with that analytical gaze directed at Iruka, which made him feel like he was being analyzed like a sample in front of a scanner or something.
— So, omega or beta?
The question came without warning, as if he were asking what Iruka's blood type was. The young man hesitated for a second, his shoulders stiffening. He hated that question — especially when it came out of nowhere like that. Little did he know that Mizuki would make him feel that way more than once, as if his life's purpose was to make Iruka uncomfortable. Although it would take the omega a while to realize that kind of intention coming from the other researcher.
— Beta — he lied, with a polite smile. He was already used to giving that kind of answer.
— Hmm — Mizuki seemed to ponder something. —Well, not that it makes any difference to me. — I respect everyone equally... as long as they do their job well. — His eyes returned to the laptop open on the counter. — So, want some coffee? The machine makes terrible coffee, but I've learned to make decent coffee here. It'll help you get through the meetings with the professor.
Iruka laughed, a little more relaxed, determined to forget that question and the person behind it. Apparently, Mizuki was friendlier than he had imagined — or he was good at hiding it. Iruka now knew that he was indeed good at hiding it.
— I think I'll take you up on that. Thank you.
— Then come on. — Mizuki turned and walked ahead without looking back. — Welcome to hell. But at least we have coffee.
{...}
Sharing the bench with Mizuki, in the end, turned out to be a very pleasant experience in the first few months. They quickly became what we might call “lab mates.” Besides, Orochimaru wasn't as sinister as the rumors said, he was really just different. Eccentric, since the vocabulary to describe him is definitely not very extensive. Kabuto, Iruka's co-advisor and, at that time, a doctoral student like Mizuki, was the one who really frightened the omega, so he maintained a cordial relationship with the silver-haired man.
Mizuki, on the other hand, was intelligent, direct, quick at calculations, and precise with his hands. He always had a sharp observation to make about the latest article published in the field — or about the mistakes in other people's experiments. Sometimes he sounded arrogant, but Iruka agreed that he was really very good, and too much modesty was not common in academia. Iruka was not one to feel special, but he began to feel that whenever Mizuki spoke to him in the beginning, there was something different.
— Be careful with the pipette, Iru. — Mizuki corrected him, leaning over the younger man's shoulder with growing familiarity. — You always rush this step. Take it easy. — That was the first time he had called him “Iru” in an affectionate tone. The omega tried to hide the nervousness that this kind of “possible flirting” caused him. He couldn't tell if Mizuki was just being kind or actually flirting, so since they had only known each other for a little over a month, he preferred to ignore it. But that didn't last long.
— I'm sorry. — It's just... I get a little nervous. — Iruka looked away, trying, as always, to sound as relaxed as possible. — I know you're watching me.
— I am, indeed. — Mizuki smiled. — But only because I like to see what you do.
Iruka wasn't initially there to get involved with anyone. He had barely started his master's degree.
Then came the early mornings. And now, Iruka blamed his own neediness as well.
Friday nights when the experiments couldn't stop and the university seemed too empty and quiet. Mizuki would show up with a makeshift bento, always saying, “I made too much, I thought you wouldn't have time for dinner,” and Iruka, even though surprised, would accept it. He hated cooking, and he really didn't intend to have dinner, but Mizuki had happily ruined that plan. The two ate their lunch boxes — delicious, by the way, even after everything, Iruka still recognizes that the idiot knew how to cook — sitting on the floor of the small break room, laughing quietly as they waited for the PCR (polymerase chain reaction) results.
— Are you always this dedicated? — Mizuki asked once, leaning against the wall with his legs stretched out. His eyes sparkled, even in the dim light of the room.
— I think so. I always have been. — Iruka stared at his hands, avoiding Mizuki's gaze, because, despite being charismatic, he always felt a little strange around that particular alpha. — No one expected me to go far in research. So I kind of need to prove that I can.
— I see. — Mizuki kept his face turned toward him. — I also come from a place where no one expected anything. The difference is that now I want more than they can dream of.
For Iruka, it was truly unprecedented how confident and secure he seemed in such a natural, innate way, so much himself. The omega, on the other hand, felt small in the presence of such a powerful figure. But also protected, in some strange way.
— Do you already have plans for the future? — Iruka asked, curious.
— Some. — Mizuki looked up at the ceiling. — I want to get my postdoctorate at Osaka University, or maybe take a competitive exam too. Both, actually. Get a good scholarship. Have my own research group. Get married, maybe. Have children.
— Wow — Iruka smiled. — All that?
— Of course. — Mizuki laughed. — What about you? What's your plan?
Iruka hesitated for a moment, shrugging his shoulders.
— I'm still figuring it out, actually. But... — He took a deep breath. —I definitely want to continue teaching elementary school. And continue researching, finish my master's degree... Then my doctorate... — Iruka paused, unsure whether to make the following comment or not. — I think I also want to have a family someday. If possible.
Mizuki watched him silently for a few seconds. Then she leaned over to grab another piece of the onigiri she had prepared.
— It'll work out. You're too talented not to succeed.
The following week, Mizuki began to always accompany him to his car, regardless of the time. Then she started texting him. Sometimes she would bring him iced tea on very hot days, or leave little notes in Iruka's notebooks, such as “Good luck at the meeting!” or “Remember to eat lunch, nerd.”
The first kiss happened on a Sunday. They were working on revising an article at Mizuki's apartment, and Iruka was talking about a paper in Nature that had excited him, related to his research and an innovative topic within the theme. In fact, he was chattering away, which was typical of him. He gestured, speaking quickly, his eyes shining, and then Mizuki approached him, held his face with both hands, and kissed him.
Iruka's heart raced for the rest of the afternoon. The alpha's gesture had been affectionate, delicate, and, above all, surprising. He had butterflies in his stomach for two weeks.
From then on, they started dating. First as colleagues, as they already did with the other members of the department. Then as something more, and they began to get to know each other with other intentions as well. Iruka's friends knew. Tsunade didn't approve much, but she didn't interfere either. She knew Mizuki from some conferences and social gatherings she had attended with Jiraiya. Iruka remembered the doctor telling him, one day when they decided to go out for afternoon coffee:
— Just be careful.
And Iruka, at that moment, didn't understand why.
He was too in love to see what was crystal clear to other people. Too blind to realize what he was really getting himself into.
{...}
At first, it was easy to like Mizuki. He was pleasant, even lighthearted.
He was intelligent, helpful, always available to help Iruka understand laboratory protocols or decipher some “obscure” article. He had a charming way of explaining things and a sharp sense of humor that made Iruka laugh even when he was exhausted after classes or weekend shifts to get as much paperwork done as possible for articles or other demands from his advisors.
In the first few months since joining the lab, Iruka felt like he was experiencing a small academic miracle: being guided by someone more experienced who genuinely seemed to enjoy his company. Mizuki was even more present than Iruka's advisor himself and gave more opinions than the professor on everything the omega wrote, since Iruka made a point of always showing it to him. And Mizuki, at first, read and corrected absolutely everything.
The relationship started slowly, after that first kiss at Mizuki's apartment and a few dates at bars and cafes.
But it didn't take long for the mood to change, even though Iruka only realized it much later.
The first time he felt something strange was on a Tuesday, in the late afternoon, when Mizuki stopped by the lab and found him laughing with Izumo. He was a doctoral student like Iruka's boyfriend, but under a different advisor, whom Iruka doesn't even remember when he revisits those memories. The important thing is that he and Izumo met in a required course that the different graduate programs shared and presented a seminar together. They had gotten along well since the first day of class, and at that moment, he was helping Iruka understand a very specific statistical software, since he had passed by the lab and had seen the omega literally bang his head on the computer.
— You guys are having a lot of fun, huh? — Mizuki appeared with a forced smile on her lips, her voice too light to be casual. Iruka smiled, not noticing anything wrong.
— Izumo is saving me from my total ignorance of R. Can you believe I was stuck on a line of code for three hours?
— Oh, yeah. You've always had a little trouble with these more technical tools — Mizuki replied with a cheerful tone, as if saying something obvious. — But at least you're trying hard. That counts for a lot.
Izumo raised an eyebrow but said nothing. After he left, Mizuki approached Iruka and touched the back of his neck, which could easily be interpreted as a purely affectionate gesture.
— I feel a little uncomfortable seeing you so close to people like him. — He paused at the omega's confused look and softened his facial expressions. — I'm just looking out for you, okay? I don't want anyone to take advantage of your naivety.
Iruka swallowed hard, not sure how to respond. It was strange, but Mizuki probably only wanted what was best for him. He was, as he himself said, looking out for Iruka. Therefore, it had been a protective gesture. So that Iruka would remember that he was not alone.
The second time was more direct. They were at a café near the college, Iruka very excited about the idea of submitting an abstract for an independent symposium, outside the schedule of Orochimaru's laboratory.
— Don't you think it's better to focus on what the lab is already developing? — Mizuki asked, stirring his coffee with a spoon. — These smaller events are cute, but sometimes they expose more than they help. And you're still learning. Maybe it's better to wait another semester before trying these things on your own.
Iruka felt his stomach tighten. It wasn't a no. It wasn't a prohibition.
But why did it feel exactly like one?
— It's just a summary. I... thought it would be a good experience.
— And it is. — Mizuki smiled, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. — But you're already having a great experience. With me. With the lab. You don't need to overload yourself, you know? I'm taking care of you, Iruka. Someone needs to, apparently.
And Iruka was grateful to Mizuki. He was always grateful to him, for his protection, for his affection, for his concern, for seeing when people were apparently taking advantage of him...
Without realizing it, he was beginning to forget to thank himself.
{...}
Three months had passed since Iruka and Mizuki had officially started dating. So it had been almost six months since Iruka had started his master's degree. An entire semester had passed at that point, and he felt more engaged than ever with the academic world, beyond the classes he taught at school. The new romance was still recent enough to generate comments among colleagues in the lab, but also long enough for the relationship to begin to reveal deeper nuances.
One particular afternoon, Iruka was at the end of the day adjusting the data from his latest enzyme reaction simulation when Mizuki entered the room a few minutes later, carrying two coffees and a smile that was meant to be friendly.
— Are you still here? — he asked, approaching the table where Iruka was working. — I brought coffee. Strong, just the way you like it.
Iruka smiled, thanking him as he took the cup.
— Thanks, Mizuki. I really needed it. The program crashed again and... I lost almost an hour of work.
— You should have called me. — Mizuki leaned on the edge of the table. — I told you to do an automatic backup, didn't I?
Iruka looked away, a little embarrassed.
— You did. I just... got distracted.
— You get distracted by a lot of things, Iruka. — Mizuki said in a light tone, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. As always, when it came to him. Only much later did Iruka realize that this was an innate trait of his arrogance. — You have to learn to focus. If you really want to defend this master's degree with quality.
Iruka smiled slightly, trying not to show how uncomfortable he felt with the veiled criticism. They were alone in the lab, but the silence between them was different from before — now it was heavier. Neither of them felt comfortable, as they had before. It was dense, as if someone could cut through the atmosphere with a knife.
— I'm trying — he said softly, returning to the monitor.
Mizuki didn't respond immediately. He looked at Iruka as if evaluating his every move. After a while, he made an unexpected comment to the omega:
— By the way, I saw you talking to Gekko earlier today. You two were laughing a lot.
Iruka looked at him, a little surprised, definitely not expecting that kind of observation. He frowned slightly for a second, then softened his facial expression.
— Gekko? He was just explaining a reaction model to me that I didn't understand. He's funny, that's all.
— Funny. Hm. — Mizuki took a sip of his own coffee. — He's the type who loves attention. And you don't notice when people are flirting with you, do you?
— Mizuki... He wasn't flirting. — Iruka said, serious now. — And even if he was, I'm with you.
— I know. — Mizuki straightened up. His tone remained soft, but his gaze hardened. — Some alphas just like to play with naive betas, like you.
Iruka realized at that moment that the choice of words, the way Mizuki pronounced them, didn't sound like care. It sounded like distrust. As if Iruka was giving Mizuki reason to suspect him the way he was doing now, and that made the omega extremely offended.
— I'm not naive — he said, more defensively than he intended.
Mizuki seemed to realize this and let out a quick laugh, as if he wanted to break the mood he himself had created.
— I know, love. — It's just that I worry about you. That's all. — He leaned in to kiss Iruka's forehead, his tone soft and gentle. — Sometimes I'm afraid you'll get lost in all this. So much pressure... so many people. And you're so... sensitive.
Iruka didn't respond. He stared at the screen, his jaw tense. His heart was racing in his chest. Mizuki didn't seem to see him, and Iruka was sure of it with this kind of behavior. As if he were... “less.”
For the first time, he felt that something was out of place.
But he couldn't put his finger on it.
Not yet.
{...}
— So... I was selected to present the poster at the fall conference in Sendai! — Iruka said with a shy smile, showing the email open on his phone. He was holding back his excitement as he watched his boyfriend's reaction closely. They were in the omega's apartment, the same one where the story currently takes place, sitting side by side on the living room floor.
Mizuki was “staying too long” there and already had a section of Iruka's closet just for storing his clothes. With his light eyebrows arched, he took the cell phone from his boyfriend's hand to read the email calmly.
— Hm. Cool. — That was all he said after a second, returning the device. — But it's a poster session, isn't it?
— Yeah... — Iruka nodded, his smile beginning to falter, his voice suddenly sounding low. — But it's a big conference, and it's only my second semester of graduate school. I didn't think they would even accept my abstract...
Mizuki smiled slightly, but there was no pride on his face. Just condescension, as if Iruka were a child excited to receive, maybe, a piece of chewing gum.
— I'm not saying it's not good, Iru. Just... relax. The poster session is kind of... introductory. Almost everyone gets accepted. — He picked up the water bottle that was between them on the floor and took a generous sip, sounding completely carefree, exuding an arrogance that Iruka still couldn't quite associate with his boyfriend. — When it's the oral presentation, then yes! Then we'll really celebrate.
Iruka lowered his eyes, hugging his knees and resting his chin between them.
— It's just... Orochimaru said he was impressed with the model I proposed. He was the one who suggested I try submitting it. — His voice sounded like a pout, and he couldn't face Mizuki. That wasn't exactly the reaction he expected from the alpha.
— Of course. — The silver-haired man replied, now getting up to get something from the kitchen. — Orochimaru has always liked to get newbies excited. But you know he's demanding when it comes to results. Just don't get your hopes up yet. What you've presented so far is basic. You still have a lot to learn.
Iruka said nothing.
He wanted to celebrate. He wanted to feel seen. He wanted to be proud. He had worked and studied so hard, even if it was “only” one semester...
But all he felt at that moment was doubt. Doubt planted by his own boyfriend, the person who should be the one to support him the most.
Maybe Mizuki was right after all. Maybe it wasn't that important. Maybe he was being childish for wanting to celebrate something that wasn't that big of a deal.
— You're coming with me, right? — He asked, trying to sound lighthearted, as if nothing had hurt. He had even raised his head, his brown eyes shining at his boyfriend with a spark of hope. — To Sendai?
Mizuki replied over his shoulder, taking an apple from the refrigerator:
— Sendai is far away. I'll see if I can fit it into my schedule... — He took a bite of the fruit. — But I can't promise anything, okay?
Iruka nodded silently. Suddenly, the good news didn't seem so good anymore. He felt a tightness in his heart and stomach again. Worst of all, he felt guilty for getting excited about that silly little thing.
{...}
At least once a week, Iruka religiously had ramen for dinner at Ichiraku. It was a tradition for him, and the omega waited all week for this moment: a large bowl of tonkotsu and a generous serving of gyoza.
Mizuki went with him that week, but stood idly by while Iruka ate. He hadn't ordered anything and could only wrinkle his nose at all the mixture of smells — delicious, by the way — that filled the place Iruka considered his second home.
— Are you really going to eat all that?
Iruka, his mouth full, looked confused, shrugging his shoulders for a second.
— It's my usual order... — Doubt had taken over his voice.
— You've been eating out a lot lately, don't you think? And that broth is practically pure fat. I'm not saying you should become a fitness freak, but... Don't you feel like you're getting a little chubby, Iru? — Not even the affectionate nickname, used at that moment sounding more like a tease than affection, made the omega less upset by the comment. He suddenly felt his stomach churn, as if he were no longer hungry.
Iruka lowered his chopsticks, keeping his gaze fixed on Mizuki's.
— If I was bothered by my body, I wouldn't have ordered it. But since it bothers you... I can order salad next time. — He sounded bitter, and of course the alpha noticed.
Mizuki gave a short, sarcastic laugh and rolled his eyes, still smiling.
— Wow, drama over a comment? See how sensitive you are?
Iruka didn't finish eating. And the comments about his body didn't stop there.
{...}
On a Saturday night, Iruka was getting ready for the lab's biannual get-together. He had chosen a black shirt that his mother had given him, which always made him look good.
— Are you going with that? — Mizuki asked, leaning against the bedroom door. — It's a little tight around the stomach, isn't it?
Iruka frowned at the mirror, staring at his own body.
— I like it.
– I only said that because I know you care. It's not criticism, it's concern. You're always complaining about the photos from events...
— I'm not, Mizuki. You're the one who always complains about my clothes.
The alpha sighed, turning toward the hallway, snorting heavily.
— Does everything have to be a fight with you now? — He treated Iruka, at times like this, as if he were crazy or disturbed. It was already getting on his nerves. Although they hadn't talked about it after or during the get-together, they had a few beers at the party with their colleagues and loosened up a little. So when they got home, they had sex.
At least that wasn't affecting their relationship yet. Not yet.
Lying in bed now, Iruka rested his head on the pillow, still panting. He was smiling, his body warm and light, forgetting everything that had been bothering him lately.
Mizuki, on the other hand, seemed distant. Thoughtful.
— Sometimes... — the alpha muttered, staring at the ceiling. — It's hard not to feel like I'm having sex with a beta.
Iruka was silent. His stomach tightened. He turned on his side, his back to him. He didn't want to believe his own ears.
Mizuki didn't apologize. He just slept, while Iruka couldn't fall asleep, the words hammering his mind as if they were torture, or worse, weapons pointed at his chest.
{...}
One afternoon in the lab, Kabuto was analyzing an article by Tsunade on recessive omegas. No one there, not even Kabuto, Mizuki, or Orochimaru, knew Iruka's true nature. He himself doubted that he was really an omega, since he had never manifested a heat and his pheromones, in monthly tests, remained “dormant.” Still, this chemical issue of pheromones was in line with the research lines of the laboratory coordinated by Orochimaru, so they directly encountered the work of Dr. Senju Tsunade.
Mizuki, alongside Kabuto, analyzed another copy of the same article.
— I've never met a recessive omega. Such a rarity... — Kabuto let one of his thoughts slip out, which caught everyone's attention in the silence. Mizuki let out a bitter, dry laugh, as if Kabuto had told a great joke.
— Rarity? — Mizuki was still laughing. — No recessive omega works properly. Only if it's too rare to work. — Kabuto let out a clearly forced laugh. Iruka felt his mind go blank: he couldn't exactly blame his boyfriend, after all, he didn't know, but... What when he found out? Was that how he would look at Iruka?
As someone who doesn't work?
He wanted to cry, but there was no way to explain the tears — which burned his eyes — at that moment. So he focused on his task and pretended he hadn't heard a thing, absorbed in his own thoughts and trying to ward off the whips his mind wanted to attribute to himself.
{...}
Almost a year had passed when Iruka broke up with Mizuki. The trigger had been a specific Thursday night when he went to Mizuki's apartment very happy. Mizuki hadn't exactly moved into the omega's apartment, but it was where he spent most of his time when he wasn't in college, but that night, the two decided to spend it at the silver-haired man's apartment. Perhaps it was a sign that everything was coming to an end.
The brunette had received direct praise from a visiting professor for an analysis he had done. The professor had even said that Iruka could do a “sandwich doctorate” in the United States or Europe in the future, as he had seen a lot of potential in the sensei.
— I think I finally did something relevant — he told Mizuki the news, unable to hide or contain his smile. He didn't want to do that.
Mizuki was on the couch with his laptop on his lap. He didn't even bother to look at his boyfriend. Nor did he smile back.
— You always think you've done an amazing job. Sometimes I wonder if it's really because of merit... or just charisma. You're good at pleasing people. That's all.
Iruka stood still. He had frozen, as if time and space no longer mattered. However, what overwhelmed him was not that feeling of smallness that Mizuki's sharp words made him feel, at that moment, on that particular night, he felt... Anger. A lot of anger, because he was tired of feeling guilty for things he should actually be celebrating. He was tired of never being able to have a moment of celebration with his own boyfriend.
— Mizuki... Why do you always try to diminish my achievements?
Mizuki closed his notebook, finally looking Iruka in the eye.
— I don't diminish them. I'm just realistic. — He paused. — You're limited. And I want things you can't give me.
— Like what?
— A real connection. Pheromones. Instinct. Children. Everything you don't have. — The words sounded like poison. — I... I'm frustrated, Iruka. And you... You know that, you've never shared the same plans as me and... We don't even talk about it, because you never open up, never give me a chance, anything like that. We could... I don't know! Find some omega partner, someone who could complete everything you lack...
Iruka felt his eyes well up. He didn't want to hear any more of that, that pile of shit being dumped on him on a night when he just wanted to be celebrating a damn compliment.
— Then why are you still with me? — He yelled at the alpha, for the first time asking his boyfriend a valid question.
Mizuki didn't hesitate with his answer, his cold eyes fixed on Iruka, who was still holding back tears.
— That's what I wanted to understand too.
Silence. A dense, horrible, terrifying silence. Filled with words that only hurt the omega.
Iruka picked up the backpack he had placed next to the door when he entered and left without looking back.
That night, he couldn't sleep because he cried so much. He felt like trash, inadequate, incomplete, and defective. Everything Mizuki wanted him to feel. Three days later, he packed up all of the alpha's things and left them at the front desk of the building where he lived. Iruka definitely cried a lot after that breakup, even though it had been his decision, but there was much more to it than his feelings for Mizuki.
Without knowing it, Mizuki had touched Iruka where it hurt the most. Beyond even the attempts to diminish him academically and physically, beyond the attempts at that “false” protection that was, in fact, a form of control. He had hurt Iruka by demanding something from him that frustrated the omega himself — he didn't even feel he could be called that.
Until Kakashi appeared, just when Iruka had relearned to celebrate his achievements and thank himself, always being his first priority.
Some things really are the work of fate in that sense.
Notes:
What did you think? tell me everything, I love to know <3<3<3
Forgive me for not having kakairu, but I promise that in the next ones we will have a LOT of them, heehe. Get ready, we will also have more scenes with Sakura and Sasuke, hehehehe (Naruto will also appear more).
Chapter 16: Soften
Summary:
Sakura discovers the truth.
Notes:
Enjoy the chapter <3
We reached 300 kudos!!!! I NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED IT, REALLY. THANK YOU SO MUCH <3
song: right where you left me - Taylor Swift.
there's a playlist for the fic: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0DAcoTRSZ8HUQWDwCHqSu7?si=4d9e8e8f21074f2a
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
I, I could feel the mascara run
You told me that you met someone
Glass shattered on the white cloth
Everybody moved on
There is something very beautiful about reading a book that has already been read by someone else, especially when that someone else is Iruka.
Kakashi was the type of reader who didn't like to mark his books. That's why all his copies looked new, as if he had never even touched them. He didn't leave notes or markings and didn't dare break the spines. Iruka was the complete opposite: he loved to highlight with a highlighter, take notes, literally interact with the pages. His copy had a broken spine, a sign that the sensei also liked to bend books to read them more comfortably. To top it off, he always left a variety of post-it notes on his favorite passages — and he didn't skimp on that part.
The alpha was having more fun with Iruka's markings than with the reading itself.
The book was indeed interesting: from the back cover, he was able to understand a little of the story. Intermezzo portrays a narrative about two brothers, Peter and Ivan, who are almost ten years apart in age, with Peter being the older. Life ended up driving them apart, which was natural. Recently graduated from college, Ivan is considered a chess prodigy, even though he is only twenty-two years old. In one of the championships, he meets Margaret, an older woman who changes many perspectives in his life. Meanwhile, Peter is an ambitious lawyer whose love life is divided between two women: Sylvia, his childhood sweetheart, and Naomi, a girl Ivan's age who is simply a roller coaster of emotions. What ultimately brings the brothers together is the misfortune of their father's death, who turned out to be a completely different person to each of them. It is a book about grief, but also about love and friendship. And many other subjects, addressed in a style of writing that is a little strange for Kakashi. He feels that the author, Sally Rooney, manages to simply unleash a series of thoughts while unfolding them into a kind of reasoning that, at first glance, does not seem very logical. It's hard to explain.
In short: Kakashi is enjoying the book.
But he is enjoying the book because of the countless marks Iruka left on the pages. The markings in countless colors, with a clear overlap of yellow and blue — colors that matched the book's cover —, notes made in black pen — yes, Iruka liked to leave comments, almost as if he were talking to the book — and the post-its that reinforced his favorite quotes — which, just by looking through the book once, were many. Kakashi loved to read, he always felt more alive when he read a book he really liked, but that experience was transcending any other feeling he had ever had about reading. It was absurd and infinitely enjoyable.
He had only done this once before, with Obito. They used to always read the same books, recommending them to each other. Kakashi never thought he would return to this “habit” with someone else, but there he was, already halfway through the book even though less than a week had passed since his official meeting with Iruka. And the alpha was already thinking about the book he would recommend to the teacher. He thought about asking him, but he also wanted to surprise him. What if he showed up with a book that Iruka had already read? He didn't want to look like an idiot...
He knew he was overthinking it. That was good; it had been a long time since Kakashi had worried about the romantic side of his life.
Both he and his therapist were happy. The woman saw the whole process as a major development in Kakashi's life: he had even broken his rigid routine a few times when he was in Iruka's company. He was also feeling definitely lighter, not dependent on the teacher, but wanting to be by his side at times like their meetings. He also wanted to get to know Iruka even better. Hug him, kiss him...
...He wanted many things with him.
The only aspect that made him a little apprehensive was something he had already discussed with his psychologist. She had already asked him when he would tell Sakura everything. Kakashi knew that his daughter was not stupid; on the contrary, she was absurdly intelligent and must already know that something was going on. She must have noticed something the night he left his daughter alone at home with her friends to meet with Iruka. Naruto had even complimented her appearance, and Sakura had muttered something about it happening suddenly. He was indeed hiding this from his daughter; and hiding the fact that, in addition to going out on dates again, he was doing so with her favorite teacher.
Kakashi intended to tell Sakura — sooner or later. It wasn't right to keep her in the dark forever, even though he had done so with Sakura several times before. He wasn't a bad father, but emotionally, Kakashi sometimes felt like the most awkward person in the world. That's why he enjoyed being with Iruka. The teacher didn't pressure him, didn't demand anything from him, just seemed to appreciate him for who he really was.
Being with Iruka was light. Absurdly and deliciously light.
The characters in the book were going through something similar to Kakashi, which was perhaps why he was feeling so immersed in the book. Ivan and Margaret — the twenty-two-year-old man and the thirty-six-year-old woman — who begin a romantic relationship and learn about completely different perspectives on life through the conversations they have, in a light, organic, and fluid way. The two have an age difference of fourteen years — exactly the same difference between Kakashi and Iruka, between the alpha's forty years and the omega's twenty-six. Kakashi had to admit that age didn't bother him much. Yes, Iruka was young, and the difference could not be ignored. Maybe he should be dating someone his own age? Maybe so. Maybe Iruka should be dating someone his own age? Maybe so too.
Kakashi was honestly too busy thinking about the other aspects of their relationship — the pheromones, the fact that he was interested in someone again, Iruka's captivating personality — to worry about the age difference. He knew that Iruka was young, a researcher, and would probably travel a lot because he was such an incredible person, but that didn't make him feel any less compelled to be with him. In fact, he felt even more eager to experience whatever fate had in store for the two of them.
Being with Iruka was the absolute opposite of feeling fear.
Kakashi closed the book and went to work with that certainty in his mind, permeating his entire body.
Later that night, Kakashi would return home only after the usual bedtime. Luckily, he had left food ready for Sakura to heat up for dinner and had already warned his daughter of his delay, so she wouldn't wait for him to eat. Despite everything they had been through, the habit of sharing meals whenever possible had not abandoned them, fortunately. Even if they ate in silence, that moment of intimacy was very important to both of them, just as it had once been for and with Obito.
The girl had already eaten and was ready for bed, but first she went into Kakashi's office to look for a book to read that week. Like her parents, Sakura also shared that special and particular passion for reading. She had even learned that love from both of them. She didn't know exactly what kind of book she was looking for, since Kakashi had so many, but her eyes immediately fell on a blue copy on her father's desk, one she didn't remember seeing before.
She picked it up with her hands, her eyes running over the title in large white letters. Intermezzo. It didn't look like a new copy: it had a broken spine, post-it notes on several pages, a fold in the corner of the pages from the cover... It looked like a book that had been read more than once. It didn't even seem to belong to Kakashi, since Sakura knew that her father wasn't in the habit of treating books that way.
She only had to turn the cover to confirm that her suspicion was correct.
The book did not belong to Kakashi.
Right on the page after the cover, there was a small identification, probably made with a stamp, in black. It was a drawing of a small frog smiling and winking, accompanied by the name: Umino Iruka. It was adorable, but Sakura wasn't thinking about that at the moment. The world around her had stopped. She could only hear her own heart beating, her slow breathing. If a paper clip had fallen on the floor at that moment, she would probably have heard it too.
In her mind, nothing. But that lasted a second.
Because all the pieces had come together in the next instant.
The note Iruka had received, the same one that only Naruto had read. Because if Sakura had read it, she would have immediately recognized her father's meticulous handwriting. She would have solved that puzzle long ago, but she wasn't the one who had received the note, Naruto had. And Naruto would never recognize Kakashi's handwriting, especially since he had most likely never seen the alpha's writing, even though their families were close. Speaking of him, Sakura had received a series of more than ten funny videos from the blond now on TikTok. She intended to watch them before going to sleep, but now she wasn't even sure she could sleep anymore.
She thought about staying awake until her father returned, but what exactly would she say to him?
Sakura left Iruka's book on Kakashi's desk, in the same position she had found it. Accompanied by Pakkun, she walked to the kitchen, her gaze empty as a thousand thoughts raced through her mind. She felt as if the world had stopped for a moment; she felt an inexplicable urge to cry as well. She had already thought about how she would react when she found out that her father was dating again, but she never thought it could be someone close to her like Iruka. In fact, she didn't even know if the reason (or reasons) for her upset made sense. She was inevitably feeling selfish, but she couldn't help feeling the tightness in her chest crushing her heart.
It turned out that she wasn't upset about any of that, but because Kakashi hadn't told her anything, as he always did.
She knew it was his personality. She had known Kakashi forever, had never lived without him around, after all, he was her father. The man who had decided to raise her and currently the only person she invariably saw as family. She didn't expect him to change into something he wasn't, but she missed the organic transparency that permeates healthier families. Even though they had their friction, because Sakura had many feelings she didn't know how to deal with, especially now, at the height of her adolescence, she always tried to be transparent with her father. And she expected that same movement from her father in return — but it never came. And everything had gotten worse since Obito left ten years ago. Kakashi had closed himself off even more, considering that he had always been more reserved. And Sakura had no one else to ease the feeling of the barrier that was strengthening between them — since all the Uchiha had also withdrawn from the Hatake's daily lives.
Maybe Sakura just wanted her father to be more emotionally present. Not that he didn't do enough for her, he was able to show that he loved her, but she still missed deeper conversations. And he excluded her from that part. Even though Sakura knew it was innate to his nature, that he had always been like that, the fact that she had been excluded from knowing that Kakashi was dating Iruka had served as a kind of “last straw” for the girl and her feelings.
She forced herself to sleep, with Pakkun curled up like a pretzel at her feet.
The next morning, Kakashi was not at home. Something had happened during the night that required the inspector to stay at the police station. He had sent a message not to wake his daughter, and had also warned that Kushina would pick her up and take her to school that morning. Sakura sighed: she didn't want to lie that she liked it. She had more time to avoid facing him and at least she could start the day without any kind of argument. She ate some fruit for breakfast and petted Pakkun before getting into Kushina's car. Naruto was in the front, chattering about something random he had seen on the internet the night before. They both noticed that Sakura was in a lower mood than usual, but they didn't comment on it right away, nor during the typical drive to school.
Sakura said goodbye to Kushina and thanked her for the ride, getting out of the car next to her best friend.
— Sakura, are you okay? Did you sleep well? — Naruto asked, his voice a little lower to show concern. Sakura shrugged gently.
— More or less, Naruto. But I don't want to talk about it now. Can we talk later? — Although concerned, Naruto nodded. The two entered the classroom, and the first class of the day, much to Sakura's dismay, was science.
In other words, the first class was with Iruka.
Her friends chatted around her until the first bell of the day rang. Everyone took their seats, and moments later the young teacher walked through the door, with his usual eco-bag slung over one shoulder and his backpack with his computer on his back. His clothes that morning matched his usual style: loose dark blue jeans, a black polo shirt with buttons and short sleeves, black Vans on his feet, and his hair tied back in a loose ponytail. Sakura had already agreed with all her friends that Iruka was not an ugly person; on the contrary, their sensei was very handsome and attractive. She immediately imagined him next to her father, and for a moment, she could picture them together.
And they matched aesthetically.
Sakura pushed the image away with anger taking hold of her, and crossed her arms while still sitting in her chair.
— Good morning, everyone. Let's pick up where we left off in the last class... Open your notebooks and let's copy. — Despite the unhappy grumbling, Iruka turned to the blackboard with a purple marker and began to write. It was Friday, and he was particularly excited because he and Kakashi were going on their second official date that night. Yes. They had planned to go see a movie at the theater. He was looking forward to seeing the alpha in a few hours, even though he still had to get through his entire workday and his research. He hadn't seen him since the previous Saturday, after they had slept together at his apartment and had breakfast together. However, they kept in touch every day by text message: most of them focused on Kakashi's progress on the book, which he was really enjoying.
After putting the summary on the class topic — introduction to genetics and its basic concepts — Iruka put away his marker and began to walk between the tables, analyzing the students' progress in copying and chatting about one subject or another with some of them. He exchanged a long look with Sasuke, flashing an affectionate smile that was returned by the student: not with the same intensity, but Sasuke had smiled shyly, almost imperceptibly.
Iruka considered this a great improvement.
He passed by Shikamaru, Ino, Hinata, and Kiba's desks until he reached Naruto. The blond was copying at a slower pace, trying to make his handwriting more rounded and cute.
— Sensei, this topic seems very boring — Naruto complained when he noticed that Iruka was nearby. The teacher chuckled.
— You'll like it, I promise. — He squeezed his shoulder affectionately as he walked to the next desk, Sakura's. Strangely, Sakura remained silent as the teacher approached. She was well known among the teaching staff for always having sharp comments about the subject or any other topic; she generally liked to talk to teachers, especially Iruka. But not that morning.
Iruka sensed that something was wrong, and his heart skipped a beat as all the possibilities began to haunt his mind.
— Hey, Sakura. Are you okay?
— Uh-huh. — The answer came dryly, quickly, without her even looking at him as usual. She was still copying. Iruka bit the inside of his cheek.
— You can always count on me if something's going on...
— I know. I'm copying now, sensei. — She tried not to sound harsh, but failed. Iruka got the message and, aware that he shouldn't mix the personal with the professional, he forced himself to just nod and walk away from the girl, determined to continue the class, even though his mind was being crossed by an inexplicable anxiety. Inevitably and logically, all his thoughts led him to Kakashi: Sakura must have found out, or Kakashi had told her about them, and the girl was not at all happy about the situation. But Kakashi could have at least warned Iruka. It was okay that Sakura was his daughter, but she was part of Iruka's daily life anyway. Maybe that decision had to come from both of them, at the moment they both thought was ideal...
Overthinking wouldn't solve anything. Iruka forced himself to teach the class as best he could, with all those possibilities thrown into an imaginary rug inside his own consciousness.
At least he would see Kakashi later and could get to the bottom of this story. That calmed him down somewhat.
The morning dragged on. Iruka taught his classes mechanically, interacting with the teachers as usual, hiding his darkest feelings under a well-calculated mask. He stared at his cell phone, with no notifications from Kakashi, and held back the urge to send him a message.
Only later, after classes were over, after the usual lunch with Genma, after spending some time with Kabuto and Orochimaru in the lab, did Iruka receive news from the alpha. He was at home, already showered, even though there were still a few hours to go before their meeting. He was in bed, writing an article with Chibi at his feet. The clothes for the meeting were already laid out. Iruka's cell phone started ringing, and Kakashi's name lit up on the screen. It took the teacher no more than five seconds to answer when he saw the alpha's name.
— Hi, Kakashi? — The tone of doubt stood out because Iruka couldn't tell if it was good news that Kakashi was calling him now.
— Hi, Iruka. — A pause. — How are you? — He sounded nervous, revealing that something had happened.
— I'm fine, and you, Kakashi-san? — Iruka replied in a soft voice. — Did something happen?
— No. Actually, yes.
— Do you want to talk? I'm all ears. — Iruka offered, saving the file and gently closing the computer. He could hear Kakashi breathing slowly on the other side, and the silence indicated that he was thinking of a response to the omega.
— I... I appreciate it. But no, I don't think I can talk... — He sighed. — I'm going to have to cancel with you today, Iruka-kun. I'm sorry, but I need to take care of something that happened. Will you forgive me? I promise I'll make it up to you, okay?"
— Ah. Of course it's okay. No problem. — Iruka forced himself to sound understanding, even though his heart was racing with nervousness. — We'll reschedule another day.
— I'll make it up to you, Iruka. I just need to take care of this.
— All right.
— Thanks for understanding.
— You don't have to thank me, Kakashi.
— Yes, I do. — Another pause. — Forgive me, okay?
— It's just a date, Kakashi. I have to go now.
— Okay. Bye, Iruka. I'll text you.
— I'll wait. Bye, Kakashi. — Iruka smiled sadly before hanging up. He knew the alpha would text him. He put his phone away and curled up in bed, hugging Chibi.
He wished he wasn't so upset, but it would be a lie to say he wasn't. He had been looking forward to that date all day, or rather, all week, from the moment they set the second date after the first. He had already picked out his outfit. He was looking forward to finally seeing Kakashi, feeling his warmth, his scent, hearing his voice and his laughter in person, and he wouldn't have any of that. He closed his eyes and inevitably thought that what he needed to resolve would have something to do with Sakura: maybe his daughter wasn't very happy that her father was dating her teacher and now the two were fighting over Iruka. Yippee, exactly where the teacher wanted to be at that moment.
Iruka felt like he would explode if he was left alone with his own thoughts. So, still hugging Chibi, he picked up the phone and called Genma, his official advisor alongside Kurenai, and explained the whole situation. He didn't call the black-haired woman because he knew that at that time she must be picking up Mirai from school and he didn't want to disturb her.
— I think you're exaggerating a little, Ru. Or thinking too much...
— Exaggerating?! I mean, Genma, if I had a daughter and she told me she hated the person I was dating, I would stop dating that person too!
— When did Kakashi tell you that Sakura hates you?
— He didn't. But it's a plausible conclusion, don't you think? He canceled on me today...
— It's not plausible. You don't have any proof of that. Besides, Sakura is your student and she adores you! — Genma paused. — I don't think this has much to do with you, Iruka. It wouldn't be something exactly personal. If she's upset about something, I'd say, trying to think like a teenager, she must be more upset about the fact that her father is dating again than about who he's dating. My parents are divorced, and even today, even after the age of thirty years, I can't handle it very well when my mother shows up dating someone new. Imagine how it is for a sixteen-year-old girl...
— Yeah...
— And, of all the people in the world he could date, he's dating her teacher!
— We're not dating...
— Not yet. And you understand, Iruka. Why would Kakashi choose you, his daughter's teacher, when there are so many other people? It seems like a personal attack, yes, but to her.
— Okay, now you're not helping. — Iruka growled, which elicited an awkward chuckle from Genma.
— Okay, okay, I'll stop. I'm sorry. But you know what will help you? Paying me back for that beer you owe me. Let's go out for a drink tonight, man. It'll do you good. I know your plans were probably to rot in bed with your jealous cat, but your buddy here isn't going to let that happen. I'll meet you in front of your building at 8 p.m.
Iruka accepted the invitation.
{...}
Even watching from afar, Sasuke could tell that Sakura wasn't feeling well that morning. The girl, always so cheerful, talkative, and interactive in every class — even to the point of being a little annoying — was quiet and down. That kind of mood suited Sasuke himself more than Sakura.
So when, during the first break, Sakura chose to stay in the classroom, sitting in her chair doing something in her notebook, Sasuke took the chance to approach her. He still had the conversation from the science fair with Iruka-sensei in his head:
"And as for your friends, I think you're closing yourself off too much, Sasuke. I know it's not voluntary. That you created this way of protecting yourself after all the trauma, but it's not healthy to isolate yourself like this. And everyone likes you very much, especially Sakura. She's always trying to get closer to you..."
He didn't need to be afraid.
Sasuke took a deep breath before approaching her, as if each step required him to shed a layer of the armor he had built up over the years. He stopped beside her desk, waiting for her to notice his presence. Sakura slowly looked up, inevitably surprised to see him there. He had never approached her spontaneously. Much less sought conversation. All that had existed between them in those ten years were Sakura's always unsuccessful attempts to have some kind of contact with Sasuke.
— What is it? — she asked, her voice low but firm, though a little suspicious.
— You're acting strange today. — His response came quickly, in that low tone of voice typical of Sasuke.
Sakura frowned, turning her eyes back to her notebook. It was as if she had just heard a joke, because she felt a very honest urge to laugh.
— Strange how?
— Quiet. Slow. You seem... sad — he said, finally sitting down at the desk next to hers.
She finally laughed, but there was no humor in her laughter.
— That's funny coming from you. — The sharp reply came without Sakura being able to control herself. Fortunately, Sasuke was prepared.
— I'm serious, Sakura.
The silence between them lasted for a few seconds. Sasuke didn't force anything. He just stayed there, present. And that, in a way, was already a huge gesture. Sakura stared at her notebook, now doing nothing, not even drawings or random notes like before. It seemed, and was, strange to be talking to Sasuke after years and years of being ignored by him. Now that she had him by her side, it seemed as if time had not passed. The two were the same children who played incessantly while their families gathered at barbecues or festive events, happy and with that lightness in the air that only childhood can provide for people.
— I discovered something — Sakura finally began, without looking at him. — Something that left me... confused.
Sasuke just waited, without saying a word to pressure her. He was there to listen to her, to be the friend he hadn't been all those years.
— It's about my father... and Iruka-sensei. — Sasuke's heart stopped. She didn't know then. He knew, but she didn't.
The girl looked at him at that moment. Sasuke raised an eyebrow but said nothing, hiding his surprise at the subject she had brought up. Not surprise at the subject, but surprise that she had brought it up. And, of all people, that it was him she was talking to about it. It seemed like a joke.
— They're together. Like... really together.
Sasuke blinked, pretending to digest the information. He could have simply said: “Yes, Sakura, I know, I heard them and saw them kissing in the music room. On the day of the science fair! Surprise!!!!!!!!”
— How did you find out? — That's what he said, instead of the alternative.
— A book. I went looking for one to read last night and found a copy in my father's office that I had never seen before. All I had to do was open the cover to see Iruka's name there, with a stamp and everything. — She closed the notebook tightly, as if the memory bothered her more than she would have liked, also clenching her jaw with the anger that overwhelmed her. — I don't know why it affected me. It's not like I have any kind of right over their lives. But... I don't know. It took me by surprise.
Sasuke was silent for a moment, as if pondering her feelings, and then said:
— You felt left out, is that it?
Sakura didn't answer right away, shrugging her shoulders. The question hurt more because it seemed true, as if Sasuke had scanned her body.
— Maybe a little. I thought I knew everything about my father's life, even though he was more reserved with his feelings... And now I feel like I've lost something. Like time has passed and I haven't kept up. — Her eyes burned with tears she still wouldn't let escape.
Sasuke nodded slightly. He understood that feeling better than he would like to admit; his chest had ached at the pink-haired girl's realization.
— I felt that way too... when I realized that everyone had moved on. And I was still in the same place.
She looked at him sideways, a little surprised. She never expected Sasuke to want to talk to her, let alone talk openly about his own feelings. It was too much progress for a conversation that had been ten years in the making.
— You're not alone, Sasuke — she assured him, her voice soft. — I never stopped caring.
He held her gaze for a few seconds. There was no smile, no comforting words. But something between them was mending; finally, something was healing.
— I know — he replied, almost in a whisper. — And neither do you, Sakura.
And for the first time in a long time, Sakura felt that the two of them were beginning to reconnect. The friendship they had built in childhood was beginning to take on the same nuances as ten years ago, perhaps even stronger now that they were both older.
— I think you need to tell Kakashi how you feel, Sakura — Sasuke added. — Besides, I... I didn't know you didn't know. I saw them... Actually, it was a big accident. On the day of the science fair, the two of them were locked in the music room and I opened... — Sasuke didn't know the best choice of words to explain... — And they were kind of making out. — He preferred to use that instead of saying “they were completely making out.”
Sakura raised her eyebrows and widened her eyes. Then she blinked once. Twice. Three times.
— Oh. Good to know. — Her voice sounded flat, almost mechanical. — Thanks for not hiding it.
— You're welcome. — Sasuke knew he couldn't and shouldn't demand anything from Sakura, especially since they were just now resuming their friendship, but he couldn't help himself. — Don't be hard on your father, okay? He loves you and is a great dad, anyone can see that. And Iruka is also a good choice for a boyfriend, don't you think? — Sasuke was really trying to ease the situation, because anyone could see that Sakura was affected by all this.
The girl just stared at him with a clearly forced smile and said:
— You can trust me. I won't be hard on my father, Sasuke.
{...}
As happy as she was to have resumed her friendship with Sasuke, the anger inside Sakura was greater. She felt betrayed by her own father, yes, that was exactly it.
Kakashi arrived at the school gate at the usual time. His light jacket hung from his shoulders, his hair messy from the previous stress, and his now calm expression contrasted with the anxiety he had felt since leaving the police station after resolving the big unexpected event that night. Seeing Sakura had been the most familiar part of his day for years. A part of the routine that he valued with all his heart, whenever he was available to pick her up from school.
But when he saw her standing in the distance, arms crossed, eyes red, he understood that something had changed.
She got into the car without saying a word. He respected her silence, started the engine, and drove off, accustomed to her moods — at least he thought he was. Only this time, the silence wasn't due to tiredness. It was tension. It was a restrained anger that he only knew she was feeling when his daughter opened her mouth.
— Is that book in your office Iruka-sensei's? — she asked, bluntly, still looking out the window. That caught the alpha completely off guard while driving. He forced himself to keep his dark eyes on the road, following the familiar route to their house, but he gripped the steering wheel tightly, feeling his heart beat harder in his chest.
The silver-haired man took a second longer than he should have to answer.
— Yes. I borrowed it from him. — That was all he said, thinking it would be an acceptable answer for his overly intelligent daughter.
— Are you two together?
The question came out bluntly, leaving no room for escape, once again. He kept his eyes on the road, but took a deep breath. She refused to look at her father, also feeling her heart pounding inside her chest with all the strength possible for the organ that pumped blood. She knew Kakashi very well, so she knew he was taking his time to answer because he was thinking about what words to use to answer her questions.
— We are getting to know each other better, yes — Kakashi replied, trying to sound natural. But he still felt that something was wrong, and he knew that he was the one who had made the mistake.
Silence returned. But Kakashi felt it burning inside him, dense and alive, as if it were a person sitting with them in the car.
— And when were you going to tell me? — she asked, in a louder tone.
— When the time was right, Sakura. I was talking about it with Iruka, because he's your teacher...
— And you thought that time would never come? That I would find out by chance? That it wouldn't affect me? — The girl completely ignored the part about Iruka. She didn't want to hear the teacher's name at that moment.
— I didn't want to hurt you.
— But you did. — Sakura turned her face toward him, her eyes brimming with frustration and hurt. — You... You were the only one left, Dad. After Obito, you were all I had. And now... now you're with someone else, as if nothing had happened!
He didn't answer. He calmly parked the car in front of the house and turned off the engine, still without looking at her. At least she had all that when they were arriving home. His daughter's words pierced his chest like knives, hurting him exactly where it hurt the most.
— It's not like nothing happened — he finally said. — Nothing will erase what Obito was. To me. To you.
— Then why does it seem like you've moved on and I haven't? — Her voice trembled, sounding more fragile and vulnerable than ever. It was more than anger. It was abandonment. It was fear. Kakashi just didn't know yet what kind of fear his new relationship might awaken in his daughter.
— Because moving on doesn't mean forgetting. It just means continuing to breathe, even when it hurts — he stared at her after saying those words. — And I continue to breathe for you too, Sakura. You have been my only strength all these years, my love.
She unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the door forcefully, her eyes filled with tears that refused to fall. She stubbornly held the tears inside her green eyes.
— I just wish you had told me — she confessed, her voice lower now, sounding definitely hurt. — I just wanted to be a part of it. — That tone and those words made every cell inside Kakashi ache, tremble inside him, as if he deserved every possible punishment for himself.
Then Sakura ran into the house, leaving Kakashi in the car, alone. He didn't follow her. He knew that this time, she needed space more than ever.
But her words hurt. Because he still carried those ghosts too — and he needed to learn to love with them around, even after all these years. That's how grief is. He could still remember one particular sentence from Iruka's book: “Grief is love that has nowhere to go.”
That was how both he and Sakura felt. And they didn't talk about it, because Kakashi couldn't.
He knew he should be more open with his daughter — in every way. But there was so much guilt that he didn't want his daughter to know about those terrible feelings he had. Even if it wasn't just about those feelings.
He stood there, inside the car, his hands still resting on the steering wheel, his shoulders slumped, as if his entire body had deflated along with the silence that followed Sakura's departure. The house was just a few steps away, but he seemed distant. Trapped in that moment inside an infinite abyss about to swallow him up.
He lowered his head, then closed his eyes. Her question: “Are you with someone else as if nothing had happened?” echoed inside his own head like an echo inside an isolated cave.
No, it wasn't as if nothing had happened. It was precisely because it had happened that he had become so cautious, so closed off, so slow to accept that there could be something beyond absence. Obito had left a void that no time, no space, and nothing in this world or universe could fill.
And then Iruka came along.
So different. So alive. So present. No pressure, no expectations, just... A new possibility. But he knew. He knew that with every step in this new direction came the risk that his daughter, his safe haven, would feel abandoned. And that — that he didn't want. But that was exactly what he had done, even if he hadn't meant to.
“I just wanted to be a part of it.” That sentence hurt more than any other.
He ran his hand over his face, feeling the calluses on his fingers brush against his cheeks. Emotional exhaustion mixed with guilt and the realization that perhaps he had waited too long. That the protection he thought he was offering Sakura had, without him realizing it, turned into abandonment.
Kakashi finally took a deep breath and stared into the rearview mirror. His own eyes looked back at him — tired, marked, but alert.
— You always knew she was our blind spot, didn't you, Obito? — he muttered, in a tone too low to be heard by anyone except his own ghosts, perhaps, if they were around at that moment. — But I can also see now she’s my shelter. My safe haven. — As Iruka once told him.
He finally opened the door and got out of the car with the slowness of someone carrying more than they should. But before closing it, he stopped and looked one last time at the empty passenger seat.
Sakura would forgive him. He knew that, even though he didn't feel he deserved it yet. Even though he had agreed with Iruka not to tell Sakura or anyone else, he now wondered if it had been a fair decision to his daughter, undoubtedly the most important person to him in the whole world.
He closed the car door carefully, quietly, and then entered the house with slow steps. He received a less than warm welcome from Pakkun and learned that his daughter had locked herself in her room. At least, while he petted the puppy, he could still feel his heart beating in his chest, albeit painfully.
Later, when it was already night, Kakashi knocked softly on Sakura's bedroom door. He had canceled the movie with Iruka because he didn't want to leave his daughter alone at home, especially when the two still needed to work things out.
— I'm not hungry! — was the only response that came from inside, muffled, almost automatic. Given the time, Sakura figured her father was there to offer her dinner.
— I know. That's not why I'm here. — The response, in that ever-calm voice, surprised Sakura a little.
A hesitant silence ensued. Sakura said nothing, still assessing her father's intentions. And then, after a few seconds, the doorknob turned slowly, and the door opened slightly, revealing Sakura standing there.
The girl was wearing a sweatshirt, her hair tied up haphazardly, her eyes red and swollen, mascara running down her cheeks, the black ink leaving an ugly trail. Her face showed exhaustion as she looked her father in the eyes. It hurt to see her like that, especially knowing that he was to blame for it.
Kakashi raised his hands in a sign of surrender.
— Can I come in?
She shrugged but stepped aside. And he entered, having received a certain kind of permission.
The room still had remnants of childhood — old stuffed animals on the shelf, school books, photos with Obito and Kakashi. That was her world. And he was part of it. He still was.
The two sat on the edge of the bed, side by side. There was an abyss of feelings between them, an abyss that could still be narrowed if they tried.
— I should have told you — he finally began, his voice low. — Not because I had to. But because you're the most important person in my life. I was wrong. — Kakashi had rehearsed what he would say, but nothing came out as he had practiced.
Sakura didn't answer right away. She stared at her hands clasped in her lap, her fingers restless.
— I'm not angry because you're dating or going out with someone, Dad. — Her voice faltered as she confessed her feelings aloud in an unusual but necessary conversation with Kakashi. — I'm angry because... it felt like I was abandoned. As if... as if now that you have someone new, you don't need to take care of me anymore. — She stared at her father with her huge green eyes filled with tears. Kakashi's heart sank inside his chest and he hugged her, unable to contain himself, because she was his little girl. She would always be his little Sakura, regardless of her age and the distance between them, whether physical or emotional.
— I'll always take care of you. Even when you don't want me to. Even when you don't need me to. That won't change.
Sakura buried her face in his chest, squeezing him as she returned the warmest hug ever.
— I just... — Her voice broke again. — I only had you and Obito. And then just you. And I know you lost him too, but... it was different. I was a child. I grew up with this hole inside me and... And now you show up in love, with that sparkle in your eye, with someone new, and I... I'm still here, trying to put the pieces back together. And I can't talk to you about it...
Kakashi said nothing for a moment, just hugged her tightly, yet gently. She resisted for two seconds, but then gave in. She buried her face in his shoulder and cried for real, her chest heaving, her hands clutching his T-shirt like when she was little and had nightmares.
His hand stroked her pink hair, his chin now resting on top of her head. He felt her small body tremble as she poured out all her feelings through a cry that had been held back for too long. A cry that he should have welcomed long ago as well.
— You were never left behind — Kakashi murmured. — You are my daughter. My home. Iruka is... another part of me. But you are the foundation. It all started with you. You are my safe haven, Sakura, my love.
— Do you promise you won't hide anything from me anymore? — she whispered, between tears and sobs. Her vulnerable voice still made his heart sink in his chest.
— I promise.
— And if he's a jerk to you, can I beat him up?
Kakashi laughed softly, a relieved and affectionate sound.
— Of course you can. But I don't think the school will take it very well. And don’t tell them that I encouraged you.
Sakura sniffed, gave a tired little laugh, and didn’t pulled away, wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her own sweatshirt, while Kakashi lovingly smoothed her hair with both hands, feeling his comforting warmth against her own body.
In that now comfortable silence between father and daughter, with the past intertwined with the present, there was room for a new beginning. Still wounded, but definitely full of love — that was the last thing missing in that house, which was now abandoning the idea of hiding feelings from each other.
Notes:
The next chapter will be funnier, I promise!
I tried to “close” the mourning arc for the two of them to bring peace to our favorite family, because mourning never ends, but things will be easier in that regard for Sakura and Kakashi #yay
As August has begun, prepare yourselves for a lot of Taylor's songs in the chapters. It's #augustseason, so get ready... (besides, Chappell Roan released “The Subway” and I'm completely addicted to it. Have you guys heard it??? I used some parts of this inspirational song to write this chapter, especially the excerpt "Made you the villain, evil for just moving on/I see your shadow, see it even with the lights off." Seriously. That was so Sakura coded for Kakashi...)
kisses and see u all next chapter!
I always love to read what you think <3 thank you all for the comments, you have a special place inside my heart!!!!!!!
Chapter 17: Drunk (on you)
Summary:
Iruka faces the consequences of his actions.
Chapter Text
When you're looking like this
I just can't resist it
I know sometimes I hide it
But I can't this time
'Cause it's gonna defeat me
But you won't believe me
Believe me
'Cause I'm a fool for you
And the things you do
Iruka woke up on Saturday morning with a splitting headache. He had slept heavily and couldn't even remember what time he had returned to his apartment or how he had managed to get into bed, considering the state he was in after sharing a few beers and a single shot of sake with Genma. Perhaps he shouldn't have overindulged so much, according to his own standards. Iruka was weak when it came to alcohol, so yes, five glasses of beer and a shot of sake were more than enough to leave him in the state he was in the night before and still result in a hangover headache the next day.
He felt the comforting, warm weight of Chibi sleeping peacefully on his shins. He stretched while still lying down and took a moment to sit up, which woke the kitten up too, and she lay curled up next to him. Iruka stroked her back, ignoring his throbbing headache. From the dim light coming through the windows, he could guess that it was still morning. Fortunately, despite the previous night, he hadn't missed the morning part of his day. He kissed the top of Chibi's head, listening to her soft purring, and smiled, getting up and dragging himself to the bathroom. He washed his face and applied facial sunscreen, refusing to look in the mirror before getting ready to look like a slightly more decent human being. He brushed his teeth and hair, which he tied into a low, loose bun because he intended to wash it later in the shower. First, he definitely needed a cup of very strong coffee.
Then he went to the kitchen and found a new post-it note stuck to the refrigerator, with Genma's familiar handwriting:
"Hey, man, I hope you got some sleep. You got pretty drunk, but you didn't do anything you'll regret—I think. Better check your phone when you wake up. Kisses from your best friend, Genma."
Iruka felt his stomach churn at the penultimate sentence of the message. Nothing crossed his mind about what exactly Genma was talking about, so even though his plans were to make coffee and toast to eat, he went back to his room and found his cell phone under his pillow. The first notification made his eyes widen, and even with an empty stomach, the omega felt an overwhelming urge to vomit at that very moment:
[You have 23 new messages from Kakashi]
Now with the time shining on the cell phone screen, Iruka could at least confirm that it was morning. It was nine o'clock now, and Kakashi's messages had arrived about four hours ago, around five and six o'clock on Saturday morning — the time when the alpha always woke up. In other words, replying to the messages Iruka had sent during his drunken night had been one of the first things the police officer had done on that beautiful sunny Saturday. And Iruka knew he had sent those messages during his night out because the last time he remembered talking to Kakashi had been when he called to cancel their movie date on Friday afternoon.
Iruka hadn't even started the conversation, but he already wanted to disappear. Evaporate. Dissolve in sulfuric acid. Become nothing more than an idea of a body, a concept that wandered around, so he wouldn't have to deal with whatever he, in his pathetically drunk state, had sent to Kakashi the night before. As he scrolled through Kakashi's messages with his index finger, a few flashes from last night popped into his head in a way that was not at all welcome. He didn't know what was worse: reading the alpha's messages or his own messages. He wasn't even thinking straight, but he decided to read his own messages first to deal with his own actions first.
Then he would deal with the consequences of his actions.
Kakashi had replied to forty messages from Iruka. Yes, that number. Iruka had sent forty messages between midnight and two in the morning. He was pathetic.
He was thinking about how annoyed Kakashi must have felt with the number of text messages the omega had sent. He could hear his heart beating at an uneven pace, as well as feel it, of course, pounding with absurd force in his chest as his eyes stared at the screen showing the chat messages with the alpha.
[Me] [12:30 a.m.]: Hi
[Me] [12:30 a.m.]: You must be sleeping now, but I'm thinking about you
[Me] [12:31 a.m.]: Do you think about me too, Kakashi?
[Me] [12:32 a.m.]: I'm at a bar with Genma and we talked about you, and I thought, wow, what a man.
[Me] [12:33 a.m.]: So now I'm wondering if you've EVER thought about me like that?
Iruka couldn't believe his eyes. How could he have sent all that? The drink had really given him unimaginable courage. At the same time, he wanted to read everything, so he would know exactly what he had sent to the alpha.
[Me] [00:40]: Have you noticed how beautiful your hands are?
[Me] [00:41]: I noticed it the first time we met.
[Me] [00:41]: In Hiruzen's office.
[Me] [00:42]: Were you wearing a mask that day because you had the flu? So I couldn't really see your face. Then my eyes went to your hands... I admit it, I take THAT blame... and they are beautiful hands. You are strong and delicate at the same time, how do you do that so naturally? You don't seem to think much about how to act, not that it's a flaw, but it's so YOU... everything you do is so Kakashi...
[Me] [12:45 a.m.]: The first time I saw you without a mask, I was obviously stunned by your beauty. But the little mole on your chin was what caught my attention the most. It's so so so so beautiful
[Me] [12:45 a.m.]: I would say it's your greatest charm
[Me] [12:46 a.m.]: but your greatest charm is actually a combination of a lot of things, Haatke Kaakshi
[Me] [12:47 a.m.]: Hatake Kakashi*
Iruka could feel his face heating up. He didn't need to look in the mirror to know that he was the same color as a red pepper too. He still couldn't believe he had actually sent all that to Kakashi. Even if it was all true, Iruka really wished he had kept all those thoughts to himself and not shared them with the alpha he was dating. He hoped he hadn't ruined everything with Kakashi with those messages... Because if he had, he was going to spend the rest of Saturday crying.
It was really a lovely plan.
And he couldn't stop reading the messages...
Iruka was trying, while reading all the words that had already been read and replied to by Kakashi, to assess the damage he had done.
[Me] [1:30 a.m.]: Genma took my phone so I would stop sending you messages, but I got it back now.
[Me] [1:32 a.m.]: I could spend hours caressing your face, Kakashi
[Me] [1:33 a.m.]: running the tip of my thumb over your mole
[Me] [1:35 a.m.]: Have you ever noticed how much more expressive you are with your eyes than with your mouth? Like, you always smile at me with your eyes. Does that make sense?
[Me] [01:36]: And the way your eyes are always shining when you talk about Sakura is so beautiful. I've felt like putting you in a jar...
[Me] [01:37]: At the science fair, the way you looked at her presenting... with such pride...
[Me] [01:38]: The science fair also reminds me of when we got locked in the music room. Do you remember?
[Me] [01:39]: I almost exploded when you took that initiative. If it weren't for Sasuke, I would have lost control
[Me] [01:40]: Your hands, which I really think are beautiful, are huge. I think I already said that????? I don't know, I'm very drunk haha
[Me] [01:45]: I would love to continue feeling your firm and delicate touch. I would let you explore everything you wanted, Kaakashi, you just had to look at me like you always do, with eyes more expressive than anything else, and you would have me in the palm of your hand.
[Me] [1:45 a.m.]: You kind of already do.
[Me] [1:46 a.m.]: Actually, you have me COMPLETELY. I won't be able to hide it for long, and since I'm drunk, what can I do?
[Me] [1:50 a.m.]: I desperately need you, Kakashi.
[Me] [1:50 a.m.]: Ignore all this if it's too much, but besides being needy, I feel like I'm already completely in love with you (and drunk).
[Me] [1:51 a.m.]: But definitely more in love than drunk. Believe me...
The other twelve messages were photos. Most were blurry, but in less than half of them it was possible to identify the faces of Genma and Iruka. Nothing compromising, just revealing how drunk he had gotten — even though the messages were more than enough. Iruka scrolled through all the photos until he reached Kakashi's reply, feeling his mouth go dry with nervousness.
[Kakashi] [5:48 a.m.]: Hi, Iruka-kun. After reading all the messages, I hope you got home safely, dear.
[Kakashi] [5:48 a.m.]: I already noticed on our date that you're not very strong with alcohol...
[Kakashi] [5:49 a.m.]: That's very cute.
[Kakashi] [5:50 a.m.]: I also hope you had fun with Genma, especially after I canceled our date.
[Kakashi] [5:51 a.m.]: It was a situation involving my family. I'm sorry.
[Kakashi] [5:52 a.m.]: But I promised I would make it up to you, didn't I?
[Kakashi] [5:53 a.m.]: Why don't you come over for dinner tonight?
[Kakashi] [05:54]: Just the two of us.
[Kakashi] [05:55]: Sakura is sleeping over at Naruto's house. They planned a sleepover... Even though I think they're a little too old for that.
[Kakashi] [05:56]: What do you say to the invitation? Answer me when you can.
[Kakashi] [05:57]: I'll be at your disposal today, Iruka-kun.
[Kakashi] [05:58]: I like to know how you feel about us.
[Kakashi] [05:59]: I also made my feelings clear in the music room. You remember, don't you?
[Kakashi] [05:59]: I can put my hands wherever you want on you, Iruka.
[Kakashi] [06:00]: Just ask me.
[Kakashi] [06:05]: And I think about you a lot...
[Kakashi] [6:05 a.m.]: I think much more than you realize.
[Kakashi] [6:06 a.m.]: Whenever you laugh, the world gets a little better. I thought it was a feeling that only I felt, but you always infect everyone around you.
[Kakashi] [6:07 a.m.]: You're like the sun, Ruka. You're bright and you light up everything around you.
[Kakashi] [6:08 a.m.]: I would gladly be your moon. Would you let me, dear?
[Kakashi] [6:10 a.m.]: I'll wait for your answer about our dinner.
[Kakashi] [06:11]: Eagerly.
[Kakashi] [06:12]: I am also completely in love with you, Iruka. In addition to being absolutely in need of everything that surrounds you.
The world could have stopped spinning at that moment for Iruka. He had to read and reread all the messages at least five times. He dropped his phone, still on, and grabbed a pillow, burying his face in it as if that gesture would wake him from the wonderful dream he was living.
He didn't wake up, because it wasn't a dream.
He was really living all of that.
When he grabbed his phone, even though he was shaking and his heart was almost jumping out of his mouth, he knew exactly what to type.
[Me] [9:40 a.m.]: I accept, Kakashi. I'll bring dessert.
The reply came in the same second.
[Kakashi] [9:40 a.m.]: Now I eagerly await you.
{...}
Iruka wasn't one to show off, but that Saturday, he needed to demonstrate a little more skill. Even though he wasn't a good cook, he was confident in a few desserts. The chocolate and coffee trifle he had learned from his mother was one of them. Besides being delicious, Iruka knew how to decorate it so that it looked elegant and extremely beautiful, which he imagined would go well with the dinner Kakashi would prepare for them. He clearly remembered how detailed that first dinner had been, weeks ago, with Sakura, and he already imagined that today would be no different. Kakashi would do something spectacular, and Iruka wanted to live up to the alpha. Or as close to it as he could get.
He had placed the dessert in a clear glass dish, covered with plastic wrap to protect it. The layers, visible through the container, were impeccable inside. The finished pavê had a chic contrast, in Iruka's opinion: the dark chocolate cream had an intense and shiny appearance, made with the most expensive cocoa the omega could find at the market near his home, and a touch of coffee liqueur to leave that warm and inviting “I want more” taste with each spoonful. Between each carefully assembled layer of cream, Iruka placed champagne cookies moistened with coffee so that they were soft, but not enough to fall apart. On the surface of the dessert, there are generous shavings of dark chocolate and very fine slivers of white chocolate, which add to the visual appeal. His mother usually sprinkles cocoa on top, but Iruka doesn't like the strong taste of pure cocoa.
Iruka held that impeccable platter with both hands, now standing in front of Kakashi's door. His appearance was no less impressive than the pavê he had spent the entire afternoon preparing: the omega had chosen a black shirt made of textured fabric, with a light fit that moved with his gestures. On his legs, he wore dark, straight-cut jeans, comfortable, with a more formal look for that specific occasion. His brown hair had been washed, but Iruka tied it back in a low, casual bun—something practical, but which still showed that the teacher had thought about every detail of that outfit. And he had thought about it.
He was ready to ring the doorbell when the door opened before he could even touch it. Kakashi's figure filled his vision: the alpha knew Iruka had arrived before the teacher announced it.
The policeman's appearance took Iruka's breath away.
He was wearing a dark gray long-sleeved dress shirt that provocatively highlighted his broad, strong shoulders. The sleeves were carefully rolled up to his forearms, revealing part of his bulging veins and an extremely elegant silver wristwatch. Black tailored pants adorned his long legs, which were most likely muscular and toned, according to Iruka's vivid imagination. He had noticed these details with his peripheral vision, because his eyes were locked in eye contact with Kakashi. Over his entire outfit, he was wearing a black apron, tightly fastened around his dangerously thin waist.
Hatake Hot Kakashi — that should be his name.
— Hi — Kakashi broke the silence, smiling slightly.
— Hi — Iruka replied, biting his lower lip. — I brought... dessert.
— It's beautiful — Kakashi observed, then gently took the tray from Iruka's hands. Their fingers brushed against each other, sending a delicious wave of shivers through his body. — But no more beautiful than you, sensei. Please come in.
Iruka said nothing, just smiled in a way that made Kakashi's eyes light up. He made room for Iruka to enter and, since he already knew the Hatake house, continued walking until he entered the room. Pakkun greeted him, and while Kakashi put the pavê in the refrigerator, Iruka crouched down to pet the puppy's belly. Pakkun had lain down to receive the omega's caress.
— Are you okay? — Kakashi's voice came from the kitchen. Iruka could smell something delicious coming from there, from the pots and pans that Kakashi stirred with absurd skill that made him even sexier than he should be allowed to be. Iruka got up and approached the kitchen, standing in front of a counter that separated them.
— Yes. And you?
— Me too. You didn't answer me, but did you get home okay today? After... yesterday.
— Yes, I did. Genma... dropped me off at home. — Iruka didn't imagine that Kakashi would be so direct about that subject, nor did he want to talk about it and end up discussing the messages he had sent, so he quickly decided to change the topic: — And the family matter yesterday? Did everything work out?
Kakashi was silent for a few worrying moments.
— Well, Sakura found out about us. — There was no point in hiding that information from Iruka, so Kakashi told him right away, turning his full attention back to preparing the risotto. That's why he couldn't see the wide-eyed, open-mouthed expression on the teacher's face.
— What? And... And how did she react? — Iruka still wasn't sure how to react.
— She was upset because I hid it from her. But we talked and... She just felt that I hide a lot of things from her. Which she wasn't wrong about, especially when it came to my feelings. So she was feeling left out. About a lot of things. That's why I canceled the movie.
Kakashi's answer calmed Iruka down a little from his shock.
— You didn't have to worry about the movie. It's okay. — He walked around the counter and leaned close to the stove, but still far enough away to face Kakashi, now with more courage. — I'm very happy that you talked.
— Thank you. — They exchanged a brief affectionate glance, accompanied by smiles that did not show their teeth. —I thought you went out with Genma to drown your sorrows because of what I did to you — Iruka laughed loudly.
— Not everything is about you, Mr. Kakashi. Okay, I was anxious to go out with you, but it didn't work out, and that's fine! And drowning my sorrows... I only had five beers. — It was Kakashi's turn to laugh.
— I shouldn't be surprised, since half a glass of wine already knocks you out...
— Look, don't start...
— Okay, I'll stop. — He turned off the stove and raised his hands in surrender. — I was just finishing the main course. — He untied his apron and hung it on a nearby hook, then finally approached Iruka, pressing him against the marble countertop he was leaning against. — I really enjoyed reading those messages. — His voice was low, almost hoarse. The alpha's breath was hot against Iruka's face, as he had leaned in to get closer. The omega was already completely aroused, feeling the pressure of his hips against his own.
— I sent them without thinking too much...
— I know. That's why I liked them, sensei. But you know what I'd like even more? — Their mouths were dangerously close.
— Yes, Kakashi?
— Not just reading. But listening. — While Iruka was still processing what he had just heard, he felt Kakashi's hands on his waist over his shirt, his thumbs pressing the curve on both sides with moderate, yet delicious force. — Has anyone ever told you that you're terrible at showing your feelings, sensei?
— I may have heard it once or twice...
— That's why I was so clear with you, Iruka. I wasn't sure if you wanted something or if you just felt some duty because of the whole pheromone situation, so those messages made me so relieved and... So happy...
Iruka wanted Kakashi to kiss him right there. Worse than that: he wanted them to skip dinner and for Kakashi to take him right there, on that counter, without any preparation or anything. He wanted to be his right then and there, with all his hormones and pheromones running wild. If they continued at that pace, not even Tsunade's powerful, customized suppressants would have any effect.
— Kakashi, I—
— But why don't we finish this conversation after dinner? I've worked very hard. — Kakashi then, unfortunately, walked away. — And so have you. Come on. — He pulled Iruka by the waist, placing him in front of him and placing a hand on his back, guiding him to a high table, which was not the same one they had used for dinner with Sakura. He had set two places, facing each other, with elegant tableware and a set of lit candles between them. On the table surface, the appetizer had already been served with a precision that Iruka already knew as characteristic of Kakashi: it was tomato confit bruschetta with fresh basil and parmesan cheese shavings, arranged on a light wood board. The bread was cut to the right size, golden brown, with the sweet aroma of slowly roasted tomatoes mingling with the freshness of basil. Next to the board was a small ramekin with truffle oil for them to dip the toast in, and in front of each place setting were glasses already filled with white wine. Kakashi pulled out a chair for Iruka to sit down and took the seat opposite him.
— Wow, Kakashi. This is amazing... Did you make all of this today? — The omega settled into his chair, still processing the little scene they had in the kitchen. His whole body was still warm. He was still considering just jumping on Kakashi.
— It's just a simple appetizer, Ruka. — Kakashi shrugged, as if it were no big deal. But there was a slight curve at the corner of his lips that revealed how he really felt: that he loved to please Iruka.
— “Simple.” Sure. — Iruka laughed, smiling more openly. The sweet aroma of tomatoes and the fresh touch of herbs filled his nostrils as he leaned over to serve himself, eating a little and taking small sips of wine, while Kakashi repeated the gestures.
The conversation flowed lightly between the two, interspersed with laughter and small silences laden with meaning. Kakashi seemed truly satisfied just watching Iruka taste each bruschetta, as if recording his reactions to keep for later — if only he had the visual ability to do so... The alpha drank the wine calmly, his index finger twirling the stem of the glass, while the candlelight cast golden reflections on his silver hair. He didn't take his eyes off Iruka for even a second, watching his gestures, the movement of his mouth, his eyebrows, even his hair tied back...
When the board was empty, Kakashi collected the plates with a practical movement, like a ninja.
— I hope you have room for the main course. — His voice was low, but with a hidden smile that Iruka noticed.
— After that appetizer, I bet I'll regret having afternoon tea. — The omega laughed, even though he hadn't eaten anything that afternoon. Precisely to make room for dinner.
Kakashi returned from the kitchen carrying two deep plates, each with a generous portion of wild mushroom risotto with brie cheese and a touch of Sicilian lemon. The golden creaminess spread across the center of the plate, crowned by thin shavings of cheese that melted slightly with the heat. On top, a drizzle of olive oil finished it off with an inviting shine.
— It looks like something from a fancy restaurant... — Iruka commented, admiring the presentation.
— I was going to say ‘food for people who have the patience to stir a pot for half an hour,’ but I like your definition better. — Kakashi placed the plate in front of him with a skillful movement and sat down.
The first bite made Iruka let out an involuntary sigh. He had to restrain himself from moaning.
— This is... Perfect. — And then he stared at the alpha. — You know, if you keep cooking like this, you're going to ruin me...
Kakashi raised an eyebrow, a lazy smile spreading across his face as he took his first bite.
— That's the idea, honey. — Then he winked at Iruka, causing the teacher to refocus on his plate.
The white wine continued to be served, and Iruka already felt the heat rising to his cheeks, but this time it wasn't just because of the alcohol. Kakashi's gaze remained on him as if every word, every gesture, had a special weight. He felt studied, but at the same time, he felt desired. And he didn't know exactly what to do with that feeling. Because of the drink, in addition to his elevated body temperature, Iruka felt his body less tense, his shoulders visibly more relaxed.
Kakashi just smiled slightly, aware that Iruka was more comfortable, and it didn't take long for him to discreetly stretch one of his legs under the table, lightly touching the tip of his shoe to Iruka's calf. The touch was subtle, as if he had bumped into him by accident. But it had been extremely deliberate.
— So, is the risotto approved? — The answer to the question should have been obvious, but Kakashi wanted to provoke the teacher. His foot slowly climbed up Iruka's leg, sliding up the hem of his pants until it found the skin above.
— It's d-delicious... — Iruka replied, his voice almost failing, which he decided to disguise with a sip of wine.
Kakashi kept his eyes fixed on him, with that calm but dangerous look, while continuing the slow and calculated movement under the table.
— I'm glad — he murmured before lowering his voice to an almost whisper. — But you know I'm not talking just about dinner, don't you, Iruka-sensei?
Iruka inevitably looked away, trying to hide the smile and the redness that was once again beginning to take over his face. He failed at both.
— You're impossible — he said, biting the inside of his cheek. — Actually, today you're impossible...
— And you're terrible at hiding how much you're enjoying it, no matter the day — Kakashi retorted, his response quick to come. He continued to eat the risotto, without moving his feet from where they were. The teasing continued until they had both finished, with Iruka suppressing small jolts of his body as he remained seated in his chair.
When they were done, Kakashi collected the plates and, before Iruka could get up to help, placed a hand on theirs, squeezing them firmly while staring deep into his eyes.
— No. You're my guest, not my kitchen assistant. — The tone left no room for protest. Iruka could only nod, leaning back against the chair. He was still processing everything: the scene in the kitchen, now the foot under the table... He had liked it. He was enjoying it. As Kakashi himself had pointed out: he couldn't hide how much he was loving every second of it.
And all he wanted was to go to bed with Kakashi. Yes. He didn't want to take it slow, that seemed like something idiots would do. It was something idiots would do.
A few moments later, the alpha returned with the tray of pavê that Iruka had brought. The dessert, assembled in generous layers, revealed light cream interspersed with chocolate cookies soaked in mild coffee, finished with a generous sprinkling of dark chocolate shavings. The sweet and slightly bitter aroma spread through the air.
— Wow... — Kakashi stared at the dessert as if it were a work of art. — Did you make this? — It was his turn to be amazed and ask the omega.
— I did. My mother's recipe. — Iruka sat up straight in his chair, with a certain shy pride. Modest as he always was when it came to everything he did. — Be careful, it's addictive.
— Like everything that comes from you, sensei. — Kakashi served two portions and, this time, didn't look away for a second as he took the first spoonful.
The pavê melted in his mouth, balancing the sweetness of the cream with the bitterness of the chocolate and the subtle touch of coffee. Kakashi gave a slight nod of approval and, before tasting it again, commented:
— I think this main course and this dessert are a dangerous combination. — A pause, the corner of his mouth rising. — Just like us. — Considering that Iruka had already endured all the other teasing, he only didn't choke on his pavê because he was already getting used to being teased by Kakashi that night. He smiled slightly at the police officer.
— I repeat: you're impossible today. — Kakashi let out a low chuckle, and the two ate the pavê in silence, exchanging a few provocative glances. They didn't drink wine during dessert, Iruka already feeling too comfortable inside Kakashi's house. He just helped put the dessert away and load all the dishes into the dishwasher in the company of the alpha, with Pakkun walking between their feet. When they were done, the little dog disappeared: he had taken refuge in Sakura's empty room, taking advantage of the girl's bed to sleep.
The two men were standing, facing each other again, staring at each other. Iruka had his arms crossed in front of his body and Kakashi rested his slender hands on the counter.
— So...? — Iruka broke the silence this time, narrowing his eyes as if that would help him better read Kakashi's intentions.
— So what? Haven't I made it clear what I want? — Kakashi narrowed his eyes back. He was about to explode with Iruka's slowness.
— What do you want...? — Iruka repeated, tilting his head to the side, an amused smile on his face. Ah, Kakashi wasn't the only one who knew how to provoke. The aroma of coffee slowly filled the kitchen of the Hatake mansion, revealing that the omega knew what he knew. And that, in part, he was also in control of the situation.
— I want to hear it, Iruka. I want you to tell me everything you want me to do. Everything you actually feel. — Kakashi moistened his lips with his tongue and bit his lower lip. — Everything.
Iruka looked him up and down, the smirk still on his face. He then took a deep breath, uncrossed his arms from his chest, and loosened his hair from the loose bun with one hand. Then he took a step forward, two, three, until he closed the distance between them. He placed his hands on the policeman's broad chest, feeling Kakashi shudder all over, breathing deeply. His heart was beating against the teacher's palm.
— I think I can show you very well.
That was all Iruka said before wrapping his arms around Kakashi's neck, sealing his mouth to his in one fell swoop. The alpha needed nothing more to understand the teacher's message as well: the kiss was immediately reciprocated, and his arms closed almost automatically around the slender waist of the brunette. As they were desperate for each other, the kiss quickly escalated to the next level: they were already intertwining their tongues, touching them in a dance where both understood each other's rhythm perfectly. Kakashi kept one arm around Iruka's waist and with the other he held the back of his neck with one hand under his loose hair. Iruka melted against Kakashi, his body pressed against the alpha's.
He ran his hands down his chest, tracing the curve of his strong shoulders along the way. Kakashi lifted Iruka off the ground with just one arm, eliciting an audible sigh from the omega.
— ‘Kashi... — Iruka moaned against his mouth, squeezing his shoulders. — I can walk...
— But I can carry you... — Kakashi replied without breaking the kiss, and slipped his arm properly under Iruka's butt, holding him up as he walked to the bedroom. Iruka managed to kick off his shoes along the way, leaving him in just his socks, his feet curled up as they floated in the air. He couldn't help but smile at the alpha's response.
The two had been holding back for this moment for a long time. There was no reason to hide or prepare the ground for this moment, since it was absolutely everything they wanted most. Kakashi walked through the bedroom door, still carrying Iruka, but he didn't intend to lie down on the bed with the brunette just yet. He pressed him against the wall, kissing him fiercely, feeling his mouth already more sensitive because of the kisses they exchanged. Iruka sighed, his hands now on the alpha's defined, muscular back. He had spread his legs, trapping them on either side of Kakashi's body, the policeman wedged between them. He slid his hands from his back to the front of his torso, quickly unbuttoning his shirt, revealing Kakashi's upper body in a matter of seconds.
Kakashi was the one who broke the kiss, moving his mouth to the side of Iruka's neck, tracing that curve with his lips. The gesture made Iruka shiver all over, arching his back slightly against the wall. Kakashi inhaled his scent with pleasure, which grew stronger with each passing moment, revealing just how much Iruka wanted Kakashi. The opposite movement happened with the same intensity. He left kisses and soft bites on Iruka's soft neck, delighting in the responses that the teacher's body gave to Kakashi, running his hands over his back, torso, and even his hair, messing up the alpha's strands and throwing them in every possible direction.
The omega wanted to touch Kakashi with the same intensity, but at the same time he had said in his messages that he wanted Kakashi to do whatever he wanted with his hands, because Iruka felt totally surrendered to the alpha. In every possible sense that could be conveyed by the adverb “totally.”
Kakashi made a move to take off Iruka's shirt, and understanding the alpha's intention, the omega did not hesitate to help him, pulling the garment over his head and throwing it to one side of the room. Kakashi squeezed his waist and ran his eyes over the sensei's torso for a long moment, willing to engrave every inch of the dark skin revealed before his eyes. The policeman sighed before kissing him again, holding him by the nape of his neck and taking his mouth as if it belonged to him. He pressed his hips against Iruka's, perfectly fitted between his legs. The silver-haired man's member throbbed between his legs, and he could already feel that Iruka was in a similar situation.
And the reality was even better than any fantasy he had ever had with the teacher.
— ‘Kashi... — Iruka called him again, his name broken by shortness of breath. — I need you... — He looked like he was about to cry. But Kakashi wanted that moment to last as long as possible. Besides, he would love to leave Iruka on the edge, just as the omega had done to him.
— Such a rush now, kitten... Let's enjoy it. — He murmured in the teacher's ear, nibbling on his earlobe. Iruka closed his eyes tightly, but before he could protest, Kakashi was already unbuttoning his pants and pulling down his zipper. In less than a second, he had invaded his pants and underwear, enveloping the omega's member with his slender fingers and beginning to masturbate him at a pace so slow it felt like torture. Iruka writhed between the wall and Kakashi's body, his feet curled up in the air. — You are completely hard... Do you want me that much? — Kakashi murmured provocatively, staring at Iruka's face inches from his own. A grimace of pleasure contorted his face.
— Uh-huh... — Iruka murmured, nodding somewhat bewilderedly. Kakashi was still masturbating him slowly, as if torturing him. In fact, he was playing with him. He then began to massage his glans with his thumb, making circular movements there, awakening a sensitivity totally unknown until then. Iruka dug his short nails into Kakashi's shoulders and back, leaving red marks on the man's fair skin over and over again. That torture lasted until Iruka came in Kakashi's hand, unable to control himself, as if he were an animal in heat.
That was exactly what Kakashi awakened in him — in many ways.
He tilted his head back, panting slowly and heavily. When he recovered, he lazily half-opened his eyes and adjusted his posture to face Kakashi, still holding him down, but with the hand that had been between his legs now near his mouth. His fingers were filthy with the omega's cum, and he didn't hesitate to stick them in his mouth, licking them until they were clean. Tasting every drop of Iruka that was on his skin. The omega's face and chest heated up and he widened his eyes as he watched, feeling something guttural ignite inside his own body.
He needed Kakashi to take him right then and there.
And Kakashi, fortunately, shared the same feeling.
He threw Iruka onto the bed, shirtless and with his pants open. The teacher leaned on his forearms, still with his legs spread as he watched the alpha's privileged view: kneeling on the bed between his legs, Kakashi had his shirt open, revealing his broad, muscular chest, as well as his defined abdomen that accompanied his slim waist. He got rid of the open shirt, and then Iruka's pants, sliding them down Iruka's shapely legs. Iruka's underwear was damp with pleasure, but the teacher was too intoxicated to feel embarrassed about it, especially with Kakashi's desire for him so obvious in the alpha's dark eyes. Kakashi analyzed him with pupils dilated with lust: feeling like an animal in heat himself.
Well, it's been over ten years since he's slept with anyone.
There is a huge accumulation of sexual energy inside Kakashi that will all be deposited in Iruka.
Kakashi lifted one of his legs and began kissing it from the ankle, slowly moving up the calf until he reached the knee and then the inner thigh. He climbed up to his underwear, already feeling the omega squirm under the touch of his mouth. He raised his eyes to face Iruka with an absolutely begging expression, as if the omega was about to cry to have Kakashi inside him. He really wanted Iruka to cry, but when he was inside the sensei. He wanted the omega to cry when he reached climax, while moaning Kakashi's name.
Just the idea of it made him want to cum himself.
But he knew he had to prepare Iruka first. Even though he wanted to skip several steps, he didn't want to hurt him. So he guided his face to the area below his navel and kissed him in a straight line until he reached his mouth, kissing him. Iruka took Kakashi's face in both hands, running his thumb over his mole just as he had said he would in the message. Kakashi smiled slightly at the realization, then at the same time guided one hand to the back of his underwear, Iruka lifting his hips to help him. He slid his fingers between his buttocks and it didn't take long to feel the wetness there, Iruka's nature betraying how much he was absolutely in need of Kakashi.
He used his fingers to prepare him, initially slow until reaching a higher speed, as well as a higher force in the thrusts. Iruka moaned against his mouth, his face beautifully contorted. He wanted so badly to be able to record that image to access it whenever he wanted inside his own head.
Iruka was a work of art.
The omega was already completely beside himself just from Kakashi's fingers. He was about to complain when the alpha removed his fingers and stood up. Iruka opened his eyes, frowning, to watch Kakashi unzip his pants and slide them down. Iruka felt the corners of his mouth salivate at the bulge that was revealed there, still covered by boxer shorts that in a few moments would no longer be there. Kakashi smiled at how the omega was reveling in just the sight, and walked around the bed to grab a pack of condoms from a drawer. He didn't want to do anything risky that night, so he had already prepared everything hours ago. Kakashi took off his underwear, positioning the condom on his member under Iruka's continuous gaze.
The omega would have liked to have done it himself, but he was too absorbed. Because Kakashi was huge, as well as absolutely glorious there. He didn't even know how he would handle all of that, but he knew he wanted to. Yes. He needed to, in fact.
The alpha returned to the bed, positioning himself once again between Iruka's legs. The omega lay down, running his tongue over his lips as he felt the older man fit himself in, positioning his member between his buttocks without yet pressing inside. He took Iruka's hands in his own, their fingers intertwined, and stretched his arms above the younger man's head, the two staring at each other. He kissed Iruka's cheeks before leaving a delicate kiss on his mouth, staring deeply into his eyes:
— Let's take it slow, okay? Let me know if it hurts, please. — He murmured hoarsely, and Iruka just nodded, aware that Kakashi would do nothing to hurt him. He had wrapped his legs around his waist once more and pressed them against his body as he felt him push the glans inside, which happened with some ease considering all the prior preparation. But Kakashi was still huge and thick down there.
Tears inevitably splashed from the corners of the omega's eyes as the cop pushed even further inside, while he writhed beneath him, not in pain, but in pleasure. He was still definitely getting used to all that girth inside him, but it was delicious. It was even better than anything he could have imagined or fantasized about, and it only confirmed to Iruka that Kakashi must not be real at times... Even though, at that moment, Iruka was absolutely certain that Kakashi was indeed real.
Kakashi pressed his forehead against Iruka's, his face also contorted as he felt the tight walls of the omega pressing and squeezing his member deliciously. The process was slow until the alpha was entirely inside Iruka, and when the fit happened, it was perfect. As if the two had been tailor-made for each other, as if they had really been made to be one and only one. Kakashi waited until Iruka allowed him to move, and the omega was desperate for that moment to come. He was deliciously tight and warm, and Kakashi thrust slowly against him, respectfully increasing the pace as he repeatedly hit Iruka's sweet spot, making the omega writhe beneath him.
Iruka had never cried with pleasure with a partner before. Until he met Kakashi. Tears streamed down his cheeks, especially when the two climaxed together. Iruka didn't know for a second if he was really on Earth or if he had ascended to Heaven, all thanks to Kakashi and his absurdly blessed touch. He wanted the alpha to cum inside him, but he was also aware of some risks they couldn't take yet.
Not yet.
Before Kakashi could make any move, Iruka took advantage of a moment of lucidity and Kakashi's relaxed state to reverse their positions. He sat down on Hatake at once, moaning inevitably because he still had him entirely inside him, especially now in that position. He spread his hands on his chest and stared at him, gently tilting his body:
— I hope you have more condoms, Mr. Hatake.
It was enough for Kakashi to look at the drawer next to him for Iruka to understand that he did. Fortunately.
— Great — Iruka murmured. They were far from finished.
And, fortunately, both of them had plenty of energy stored up to keep going.
Notes:
It's NOT a promise, but this week I'll try to get back to posting two chapters a week. I'm settling into my routine, so MAYBE I'll get back to my old pace!!!!!!! But #patience, okay?
I love you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tell me what you think... I'm always insecure about smut, but I'm VERY open to constructive criticism <3
Chapter 18: Invisible string
Summary:
Fate always found a way to bring Kakashi and Iruka together.
Notes:
enjoy <33333
song: Invisible String - Taylor Swift
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Time, mystical time
Cuttin' me open, then healin' me fine
Were there clues I didn't see?
And isn't it just so pretty to think
All along there was some
Invisible string
Tying you to me?
Iruka knew sex was good, but he never imagined it could be this good. Kakashi was showing him that in every possible way.
The omega had once fantasized that the alpha would make him cry during sex — even though he had never done that before, but sexual fantasies don't exactly need an explanation as if they were institutionalized science, right? — and it had haunted him all that time since he had met Kakashi. And on that wonderful Saturday night, the alpha had actually made him cry with pleasure multiple times.
Just as he had made him climax multiple times.
Still on top of Kakashi, with the alpha inside him, Iruka took a pack of condoms from the hands of the man beneath him, who had stretched out one arm to reach for the condoms in the drawer. Iruka quickly replaced the used condom with a new one, a skill he didn't even know he had. The truth is, it wasn't even a skill, Iruka simply wanted more from the police officer — and he would have it. The alpha had made the omega see stars minutes ago, and now Iruka wanted to do the same for him.
There is something absurdly beautiful about having a man like Kakashi beneath you, his face flushed and one eye closed from the sensation of Iruka's walls squeezing him on all sides. Iruka felt empowerment take over his cells, in a wave of confidence he had never felt before in his entire life. He wanted to elicit more and more expressions like that from Kakashi, to see parts of him that no one else would ever have the opportunity to see.
The alpha's hands slid down the sides of Iruka's torso until they reached his thighs, squeezing the flesh of the area with his slender fingers with such force that the skin of both became whitish with the pressure. The omega enjoyed feeling the firmness of Kakashi's touch: the man made it clear what he wanted through his gestures and words. His gestures revealed how much he wanted Iruka, and how that feeling was not new. Kakashi had been desiring Iruka for a long time, and it seemed that only now did the teacher become aware of this fact.
With this new awareness, Iruka wanted to enjoy every second.
He had both hands flat on Kakashi's broad chest, feeling the soft skin that covered all those muscles that had been well worked over the years. Kakashi's defined abdomen contracted beneath Iruka, all his muscles well-defined with their contours accentuated by the dim light inside the room, but still absurdly evident. Kakashi was a work of art in Iruka's eyes.
— ‘Ruka... — Kakashi moaned his name softly, his voice sounding hoarse, absurdly erotic. The omega felt something ignite even more inside him, now aware that Kakashi was like this because of him. The heat inside him seemed to increase with each passing millisecond. Iruka had just stood still after changing condoms, admiring the scene before him, trying to capture every detail of Kakashi he could with his eyes. For a moment, he almost forgot about the alpha pulsing inside him.
As if that were even possible.
— Uh-huh? — He tried to sound provocative, but he knew that all it would take was one order from Kakashi, or for him to speak in a tone similar to a command, and he would fall apart completely. He could try to maintain that posture for a few moments, though. He leaned forward, moaning softly at the sensation of the alpha squeezed inside him, tears already welling up in his eyes.
— Y-you don't have to force yourself... I don't want you to get hurt... — Kakashi had to gather all the breath left in his lungs, which was practically nonexistent, to say such long sentences. Iruka let out a low chuckle under his own breath, which was as labored as the alpha's, a small smile remaining on his lips as he realized that, even in the midst of everything they were feeling, the thick lust in the air filled with the mixture of their pheromones, Kakashi still managed to worry about him. Iruka kissed the same spot where his mole was on his jaw.
— Don't worry about me. Just... enjoy it. — He left a quick, wet kiss on Kakashi's mouth, considering his expression contorted with pleasure. Iruka stood up, moving his hips minimally. The movement, though small, was enough to elicit moans from both of them. Kakashi squeezed his thighs even tighter, then moved one hand up to Iruka's hips, squeezing them hard but without hindering him. He was lying completely down, but he still had the strength and control of his body to try to keep up with Iruka's rhythm with his own hips, lifting them slightly off the mattress as he planted his feet on the surface, which lifted the teacher's body a little. Iruka arched his eyebrows, once again surprised by Kakashi. The alpha really never ceased to surprise him. Iruka's short nails left soft reddish marks on the pale skin of his chest and abdomen.
Kakashi didn't miss a single detail of the omega: his long hair was loose, with a strand in front of his face, passing between his eyebrows and complementing the expression of pure pleasure that stamped Iruka's absurdly beautiful face. His dark skin was tinged with redness, the blush concentrated mainly on his cheeks, which further highlighted the thin scar that cut across the bridge of his nose. Iruka's mouth was slightly open, his lips slightly swollen, as were his eyes, from having cried earlier. The alpha felt a slight wave of familiarity invade his mind, even though it was clouded by lust and pleasure, even though he had never seen Iruka cry before. Quickly, however, the feeling crossed his thoughts and was pushed away.
There was more to focus on at that moment.
His eyes ran over the teacher's body until they stopped at his lower abdomen. Iruka had a slim figure, even though he wasn't exactly muscular like Kakashi, he had a more curvaceous body typical of an omega under the usually loose clothes he wore both for teaching and at university. Still, in his lower abdomen, Kakashi could see the outline, or a faint reminder, of his own cock there, inserted entirely between Iruka's buttocks. That sight made the alpha's pupils dilate extremely, almost taking up the entire circle of his irises. Since his eyes were dark, Iruka didn't notice. The clear vision of him completely filling Iruka, this beautiful and delicious omega who writhed on top of him, mounted on him, almost made Kakashi completely realize the control and sense of limits right there, inside his own room.
He sat up, leaning his back against the bed frame, his hands still on Iruka's hips and the other on his thigh, now properly helping the man to move, grinding at a progressive pace on Kakashi's cock, which throbbed and pulsed harder and harder against Iruka's walls. Iruka's own member was hard and throbbing between them, also betraying the state he was in. Kakashi released his thigh to encompass his cock with his long fingers, masturbating him again and in rhythm with Iruka's grinding, causing the man to arch his back without interrupting their movements. Iruka ran his hands over Kakashi's shoulders and chest, until he stopped them at the back of his neck, pulling a few strands of his already completely messy silver hair. Taking advantage of his strategic position, Kakashi brought his lips to Iruka's neck, kissing and nibbling the sensitive area, which made his tanned skin shiver in frequent waves as they both approached the moment of orgasm.
All it took was for Kakashi, with his mouth close to Iruka's ear, to whisper:
— Come.
It was more than enough for Iruka to come, his fingers pulling hard on the silver hair at the nape of his neck as he came. The pressure increased around the base of Kakashi's member with the orgasm, and the alpha couldn't and didn't even want to hold back. Once again, they came together, their breaths irregular and their hearts beating absurdly hard at a frantically insane pace. Iruka didn't cry this time, even though he had come close many times. However, he was delightfully surprised when the alpha, using the hand that was masturbating him, delivered a well-aimed slap to the softest part of his thigh. The delicious sound filled the room and Iruka's ears, as he felt the sting tingle in the area in question.
Kakashi had no intention of giving him a break so he could feel the tingling on his skin.
Skillfully, the alpha laid Iruka down on the bed, still inside him. He then withdrew carefully and kissed the tip of his nose, then took another condom and quickly opened the package to put it on. Iruka was still processing reality, recovering from his recent orgasm when Kakashi grabbed one of his legs by the back of the thigh, lifting it, while the other remained stretched out on the bed. The position they were in made Iruka lie half on his side on the bed, still comfortable, with Kakashi on top, resting on his knees. He slid easily into the omega, barely letting him catch his breath. Still, that was exactly what Iruka wanted too.
— ‘Kashi... — Iruka called out softly, in a voice that sounded very much like crying. — I want to... kiss you... — The omega could very well feel embarrassed by this request, but it was a very genuine and instinctive desire; he needed to kiss Kakashi immediately, while he had him inside him. Kakashi, of course, would not disobey him. He kissed his collarbones, moving up his neck until he finally reached his mouth. He squeezed his thigh and brought his other hand to the back of Iruka's neck, holding it there as he felt the omega's hands scratching and squeezing his broad back, feeling the muscles contract under his soft fingertips.
The two kissed hungrily, Iruka already opening his mouth to receive Kakashi's tongue, massaging it with his own. Of course, their teeth met in the brutality of that gesture, but neither of them could care less about that. Kakashi returned the gesture the moment it began, feeling the delicious warmth of Iruka's mouth as he began to move inside him, hitting his sensitive spot that he now knew. Because of this, Iruka couldn't keep kissing him much longer, besides needing to breathe, writhing beneath Kakashi's large body, his feet twisting and curling continuously as he once again literally cried with pleasure beneath the alpha.
Unable to discern any meaning, Iruka came once more, feeling the cold tears against his face, which, like his entire body, was hot because of Kakashi. The alpha also came, hitting his sensitive spot hard multiple times while leaving the marks of his fingers engraved on Iruka's brown skin. He kissed him until they both calmed down and withdrew from inside Iruka, who lay face down while Kakashi disposed of the condoms properly in the bathroom. The alpha returned to the bed, lying on top of Iruka, hugging him around the waist. The omega felt deliciously pressed into the bed with the silver's weight on top of him, letting out a sigh. They were both sweaty, sticky from the fluids they had expelled, but the set of sensations running through their bodies was absolutely incredible.
— Do you want to take a shower? — Kakashi whispered against Iruka's skin, his voice vibrating through the omega's body. Iruka moaned softly, smiling slightly.
— Yes... After napping for five minutes. — The alpha let out a hoarse chuckle but nodded.
I don't think it's necessary to emphasize that when they went to the bathroom, showering wasn't the only thing they did.
The two later slept in that same position: Kakashi hugging Iruka at first. At some point during the night, Iruka became the larger spoon, and they realized that the fit was perfect that way. Kakashi fell asleep feeling Iruka's rhythmic heartbeat against his back, while the omega was lulled by the older man's pheromones, the scent of smoke accompanied by strong notes of dry amber also filling the room, something that hadn't happened in almost ten years.
{...}
Kakashi was the first to wake up that Sunday. However, he didn't wake up at 5 a.m. as usual. He woke up naturally an hour later, his body feeling light even after all the physical exercise they had done the night before for hours on end. Iruka slept like a log, hugging Kakashi from behind, which the man easily noticed when he carefully slipped out of his embrace and Iruka just continued sleeping under the thin blanket that accentuated the contours of his body. Kakashi watched him for a few minutes, a small smile on his face without even realizing he had been smiling for so long. He slept peacefully, his face serene, breathing through his nose. He was sleeping so deeply that he could hear Iruka snoring softly, which made his smile widen. He gently brushed a strand of hair from his face with his fingertips, which made Iruka breathe more deeply, but he was still asleep.
Kakashi left him quietly in bed and got ready in the bathroom to look like a decent human being. Although he wanted to stay in bed with Iruka, he had plans for what to do for the omega that morning when they were alone. He took a quick shower and put on comfortable clothes, leaving a handwritten note on top of the dresser for when the younger man woke up. He left the room quietly, and in front of the door, Pakkun was sleeping curled up in a ball. With Kakashi's appearance, the little pug woke up, a little grumpy, but accepted a few caresses from his owner before the two walked to the kitchen.
On days when Sakura wasn't home, especially weekends, when he was most likely not working, guilt cut through Kakashi like a knife. Even though he could say he had grown accustomed to those unpleasant feelings, it wasn't easy. That Sunday, even with Sakura away from home, Kakashi was unable to feel any of that. Although he lived with grief every day, even at that moment, he felt lighter than a feather, something he hadn't felt in a long, long time. He felt he had to thank Iruka for that; he had appeared like a sun in his life and had been lighting up his days and nights ever since. Kakashi inevitably felt like the moon of the omega, gladly receiving its exuberant glow and displaying a portion of it when he had the opportunity.
He ground coffee beans and, while making the hot drink in the specific machine, cut strawberries and mangoes into small pieces and prepared some omelets — Tamagoyaki. He broke eggs into a bowl, beat them quickly, and poured a thin layer into the hot frying pan. When it began to set, he rolled it carefully, poured a little more egg underneath, and repeated until it formed a golden roll. He cut it into slices, arranged them next to the fruit, and completed the arrangement on the same table where they had dined the night before. Fortunately, Iruka didn't take long to show up.
Shortly after the alpha left, Iruka woke up. He stretched and the slightest movement of his body was enough to realize that absolutely all of his joints were sore. Iruka wasn't exactly sedentary, but he didn't have the same physical conditioning as Kakashi. It felt like he had run a marathon, and most likely he had done the same amount of exercise as a professional marathon runner the night before. A few flashes went through his head, and that was more than enough to make him blush.
It was the effect called Hot Kakashi Hatake.
He sat up, ignoring all that pain, which inevitably ended up being delightful because it reminded him of what had caused that sensation. Iruka quickly realized that, besides being alone, there was a note on top of the drawer. He picked it up, automatically recognizing Kakashi's polished handwriting.
“I'm making our breakfast. Feel free to take a shower and borrow some clothes. They'll look better on you than on me.”
Iruka found himself smiling at a little note as if he were a teenager in love. He quickly composed himself and folded the paper, then made Kakashi's bed as best he could — the alpha would have to change those sheets completely. Then he took a relatively long and very hot shower, dressing in what he considered comfortable clothes: he took one of Kakashi's shirts, which fit him like a dress, and put on his own underwear. When he arrived in the kitchen, ready to greet the alpha, he realized that Kakashi's concept of comfortable clothing was very different.
He was wearing dark blue sweatpants and a kitchen apron, which he had probably put on to prepare breakfast. Iruka had to force himself not to let his jaw drop, because if he did, a stream of drool would surely follow.
— Good morning... — Iruka said, his voice sleepy, completely focused on Kakashi, so much so that he didn't even notice the fully set table and the delicious smell of omelet in the air. — Are you trying to provoke me this early, Mr. Hatake?
Kakashi held back a laugh.
— You're the one trying to provoke me with those legs out — the alpha retorted, which made Iruka want to curl up to hide his legs. But at the same time, he liked the alpha's gaze passing over his body, especially now that Kakashi knew him so well in that sense.
— I could never compete with you in that regard. — He dragged his feet to where the alpha was leaning against the table, placing his hands on his waist before kissing him quickly with a peck. It was only then that Iruka noticed the breakfast table set up behind him, his eyes widening in surprise. — Did you set this up?
— Uh-huh. For you. — Kakashi raised a hand and gently stroked Iruka's dark hair between his fingers, his eyes fixed on the teacher's face. — I hope you like tamagoyaki, 'Ruka.
— Would it be too corny of me to say that I would like anything you made? — Iruka looked back into his eyes with an amused smile on his face. Kakashi laughed, his eyes lighting up as well.
— It would be. Besides being very polite of you, which you always are...
— Cheesy. — Kakashi laughed once more and exchanged another peck, the alpha staring at Iruka's smallest details with their faces now extremely close. He could feel Iruka's warm breath brushing against his own skin.
— Did you sleep well? Are you in pain? — The questions came suddenly after a brief moment of silence, and Iruka smiled without showing his teeth.
— Yes, like a baby. And about the pain... — He shrugged. — All over my body. But that's because I'm sedentary and not an athletic cop like you. I don't have your stamina, but I'm not hurt. It's even a pleasant pain considering its origin...
— That makes my ego swell.
— Then I take back everything I said, Hatake-san. Shall we eat? — Kakashi couldn't say no to Iruka under any circumstances. He nodded and the two sat down next to each other, the alpha already pouring coffee into the two cups in front of them. The liquid gave off a steaming vapor and the pleasant smell soon filled the house. Pakkun was lying under the table, his belly full, as Kakashi had fed him before starting to prepare the morning meal.
The alpha and omega ate in silence, enjoying each other's company. The omelets were great, as were the sliced fruits. Iruka was still getting used to the idea of being cared for — even though he knew he couldn't say he had anything serious with Kakashi, he felt a certain security within himself that he had never experienced before. It was as if his body was already certain that they would take the next steps toward a more solid relationship. Iruka truly hoped he was right, because it would be very frustrating if he wasn't. Kakashi was perfect. He was actually feeling a little bad because he wasn't like the alpha.
But for some obscure reason, that didn't make him feel insecure.
In fact, the reasons were not obscure. Kakashi had made everything so clear that Iruka didn't feel like he was walking blindly with him. Quite the contrary, in fact. Even Sakura already knew about the two of them, even though they hadn't been the ones to tell her... This was already a few steps ahead of what the teacher, with his chronic anxiety, had previously stipulated.
— What time is Sakura coming back today? — Iruka broke the silence, finishing his last piece of omelet, turning his body and gaze toward Kakashi, who was drinking coffee at that moment. He rested his cup on the Pyrex before answering.
— I agreed to pick her up at Naruto’s at the end of the day. You can stay here until then...
Iruka wasn't considering leaving, but at the same time he was still surprised by Kakashi's implicit invitation. He was still getting used to the rather obvious fact that they wanted the same things.
— Well, if it's not too much trouble...
— Not at all. — Kakashi stole a peck from him, and before Iruka was aware of the gesture, the alpha had already gotten up and was clearing the table, balancing all the utensils with enviable skill. Iruka made a move to help, but Kakashi shook his head in denial, a gesture that made the omega stare at him with doubt in his eyes. — Stay seated there. I have something for you. — He winked at the younger man and went to the kitchen, where he put everything in the dishwasher. Then he walked through the hallways to the bedroom, pulling a black velvet box the size of his palm from the back of his closet.
When he returned to the dining room and Iruka saw the conspicuous object in the policeman's hands, his eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. The words stuck in the omega's throat, as if he had actually choked on the letters.
— Kakashi, is this a g-gift...? — To complete the combo, Iruka was gesturing exaggeratedly with both hands. — I-I can't accept it, I didn't do anything... I didn't buy anything... We... I... Not that I won't like it, but do I really deserve this? You bought something, and you're also the one who always does everything, paid for the meals, I feel like this exchange hasn't been very fair...
Kakashi just sat down in front of him, the box extended toward him.
— Just open it. Please, Iruka-kun.
Iruka, feeling like he was going to throw up his entire breakfast, nodded timidly. Then he took the box, feeling the velvet surface against his fingertips. The world seemed to stop. A gift? Was Kakashi crazy? Did he want something in return? Did he have high expectations of Iruka?
All thoughts fell silent when Iruka delicately opened the box.
Inside was a choker necklace, completely gold. Iruka touched the cold, circular surface with his fingers, tracing the entire length of the necklace without taking his eyes off the accessory that sparkled in the light.
— I saw this in a shop window — Kakashi broke the silence, sounding casual. — I think you suit beautiful things, so I bought it for you.
Iruka remained silent and looked up from the necklace to make eye contact with Kakashi. The older man's eyes sparkled with anticipation, waiting for Iruka's reaction to the gift. Not the previous reaction, but whether he liked it or not. And honestly? Iruka loved it. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his entire life.
— Kakashi, I've never given you a gift...
— I'm not expecting anything in return, Iruka. I just wanted to give you a gift. — In a patient gesture, Kakashi squeezed Iruka's hands over the box. — Please accept it. I don't expect you to wear this accessory either, I mean, it's not pressure on you. Although I would be very happy if you did wear it. — A smile spread across his face. Iruka, still a little paralyzed, nodded, processing everything that was happening.
Kakashi couldn't be real. He probably came straight out of a fairy tale.
— Okay. — He finally took the necklace and lifted it up, then in one swift motion, slipped it around his neck. The fit was perfect.
The smile on the alpha's face grew. Iruka felt his lap warm up, as did his face.
— I don't usually brag, but I was right. Beautiful things really suit you, kitten.
Iruka couldn't help but smile at the nickname, a nickname he had received in bed and which brought back many memories. Although he didn't know how to react appropriately to compliments, his eyes sparkled in Kakashi's direction.
— Thank you, Kakashi-san.
— You don't have to thank me.
— Yes, I do. — Iruka then got up only to sit on Kakashi's lap, still wearing the necklace. The alpha appreciated how the gold contrasted perfectly with the omega's tanned skin. It had been the perfect choice for a gift. He was feeling proud of himself, even though it didn't quite fit his personality. — Since Sakura isn't coming back for now, we could watch a movie. You owe me that. — Kakashi chuckled softly, hugging him around the waist.
— We can do anything you want. — And it was the absolute truth.
Kakashi was following his heart exclusively in the most genuine and lighthearted way possible for the first time in many, many, many years. And it was wonderful to be experiencing this with someone like Iruka.
{...}
[You have 20 missed calls from Mom]
[Tsunade] [4:53 p.m.]: Iruka, dear, forgive me. I thought you had already told your mother everything...
[Tsunade] [4:55 p.m.]: She told me she's buying the earliest ticket to Japan.
{...}
On the night he broke up with Mizuki, before going home and crying himself to sleep, Iruka stopped by Ichiraku. Because he might have been feeling down, but that didn't mean he would stop eating, especially because of an idiot like his (now) ex-boyfriend.
Even though he was relieved by the breakup, it still hurt a lot. That's why he arrived at the restaurant with red, swollen eyes and tear marks on his cheeks. Teuchi obviously noticed, but made no comment on Iruka's appearance as the omega approached with determined steps, sitting down on the chair in front of the counter and throwing his backpack on the floor carelessly, not caring about his own belongings.
— The usual. — A sniff. — Please.
Iruka didn't need to repeat himself: the man was already preparing his classic order, the simplest type of ramen, but at the same time, the tastiest of all. Iruka sighed, spreading his hands over his face as he processed everything that had happened and everything he was feeling at that moment. He had broken up with Mizuki, which meant there would be no more fights, or bouts of jealousy and insecurity in his routine. That should be a good thing, so why did his chest feel tight, as if he had made a bad decision?
Iruka knew, deep down, that this was the result of the manipulation he had been subjected to for almost a year. Practically an entire year. Of course, the change would not happen overnight, even though Iruka was already aware of how bad that relationship was for him. He was already crying again when he realized the reality, and with his face wet, he asked Teuchi for permission to go to the bathroom.
Little did he know that he was being watched: there was a man wearing a black hospital mask, with silver hair and curious eyes, sitting at a table in the corner. That same man didn't even know, at that time, that the other man who was crying was actually his daughter's teacher and his future “almost-boyfriend.”
That's right. Kakashi was at Ichiraku that night.
He knew, the first time he gave Iruka a ride, that the neighborhood was familiar. But he couldn't remember exactly: it had been a chaotic day at the police station, and he had entered the first quiet establishment he found after driving around aimlessly for a long time. He didn't want to go home stressed out, where Sakura, accompanied by Sakumo, was waiting for him. So there he was, drinking a cup of hot green tea after eating a huge bowl of the best ramen of his life.
Apparently, Kakashi wasn't the only one having a bad day that day. Fortunately, he had a good heart.
When Iruka returned, the hall was empty. On the counter in front of his seat, the ramen was there, served, with steaming, delicious steam mixing with the air. He smiled — even with his tearful face. Teuchi analyzed him, and when he opened his mouth, he surprised Iruka:
— That man at the table back there paid for your order.
Iruka frowned.
— What? Which man? Why?
— He didn't specify. He was a man with silver hair. His name is H—
— If he has silver hair, I'd rather not know, Teuchi-sama. Thank you very much. — Iruka sighed, picking up his chopsticks. — At least something good came my way today from a man with silver hair. That was your ramen.
Teuchi shrugged, deciding to tidy up the dishes for the night, because it was already closing time.
Only three years later would Kakashi meet Iruka again. And he would recognize him months after their reunion: when he saw him crying with pleasure beneath him, he immediately remembered his tear-swollen features at Ichiraku, even though they were completely different types of crying. Fortunately.
Notes:
What did you think??? Feel free to comment, I love reading and interacting with everyone! <3
I want to thank you so much for the comments, kudos, bookmarks, subscriptions... you guys are amazing!!!!!
I wanted this chapter to be longer, but I also wanted to release it soon because of the smut hehe (which I really enjoyed for the first time in my life as a fanfic writer. I hope you enjoyed it too)
See you in the next chapter!!!!! Kisses!
(I think the next one will come on Sunday or Monday at the latest. Fortunately, I have more time on weekends hehe)
Chapter 19: Echoes
Summary:
Iruka sees Naruto as a mirror image of himself.
Notes:
TW: bullying and physical aggression!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hope you enjoy the chapter...
song: sienna - The Marías
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Would’ve looked just like you
With a temper like you
Run around like you
Jumping in the pool
Like you
— Why can't you tell me what you talked about with him?
— Naruto! Would you find it acceptable if I shared our personal conversations with other friends?
— Come on, Sakura, but I'm your best friend. That would be unfair.
— Exactly. That's why I can't, won't, and definitely don't want to tell you the details of my conversations with Sasuke. — The girl snorted. — Especially now that we're finally getting closer again.
— Yeah, but I'm curious...
— Curious? — She laughed without humor. —You're a jerk, that's what you are! You've always had a huge crush on Sasuke and you want to use me as a bridge to get closer to him too! But let me remind you of something: you've been dating Hinata for months! She then spoke even more quietly as she brought the girl into the conversation. The same Hinata who is downstairs braiding Ino's hair.
Naruto rolled his eyes.
— First of all — the blond raised his index finger, a determined and serious expression on his face, — ‘Huge crush’ is a big exaggeration, Hatake Sakura. I've always thought he was cute, okay, I'm guilty of that, but huge is too much. Second, I would never be so self-serving as to want to use you, my childhood best friend, as a bridge! Third: Hinata and I don't have anything serious...
— Naruto, she's in love with you. In fact, she's been in love with you forever. — Sakura raised her eyebrows at him. — If you don't feel anything for her and don't want to hurt her, it's better to be honest. End this mess and stay friends.
Naruto sighed, bringing a hand to the back of his neck, scratching the spot with his fingertips in an anxious gesture.
— I'm still going to talk to her. — A pause. — Eventually. But I think she knows we're not going to date...
Sakura rolled her eyes again: Naruto knew how to be very stupid when he wanted to. She really didn't want an unpleasant situation between the two of them, after all, both Naruto and Hinata had been her friends forever. It would be terrible if there were a fight of this magnitude among the group of friends she cared so much about. She hoped Naruto would act soon, even though his words and actions told Sakura that he would eventually break Hinata's heart.
Sometimes she wanted to shake Naruto by the shoulders until his brain was back in place.
— Uh-huh, of course. — Sakura then turned to Naruto's closet. The two were in the boy's room, looking for a board game for everyone to play while watching a movie in the living room before going to sleep. — Where do you keep the games, Naruto?
— On top of the closet. Let me get it. — Naruto opened the closet and took the Monopoly box from the indicated place, then turned back to his friend. —You're really not going to tell me...?
— Naruto, for the last time, no! — Sakura stamped her foot on the floor. — Let's go back. The girls are waiting.
— Okay... — He sighed, finally giving in. But he was still far from giving up.
The three of them — Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke — began their childhood as inseparable friends. Naruto had some picture frames of the three children at home — one in his bedroom and two in the living room, where they were now headed — and this friendship lasted daily until they reached the age of six. At the same time, Uchiha Obito died on that tragic day, and the Uchiha clan consequently swore never to speak to the Hatake clan again. Still a child at the time, Sasuke could do little but obey what had been decided by his family. However, the Uchiha clan did not just distance themselves from the Hatake clan. Of course, it was much more blatant because of Kakashi, Obito's widower, but before that, they used to be friends with all the families their youngest son had contact with: Uzumaki, Nara, Hyuuga, Yamanaka...
People understand that an essential part of dealing with grief is a period of isolation. Not in a generalized or total, radical way, but when we are going through the grieving process, many parts of that process consist of extremely introspective moments. The problem with the Uchiha was that their process consisted of only one step: complete isolation.
Everyone knew that Obito was the treasure of Mikoto's life, just like her other children, Itachi and Sasuke. Obito was her firstborn, the first child she had with her alpha, Fugaku, and she was extremely proud of him: he was a successful writer, very determined, and loved by everyone who knew him. When she decided to marry Kakashi, her teenage boyfriend, Mikoto accepted, even though she didn't really approve. In the extremely traditional Uchiha family, it was common for marriages to be arranged by parents. Still, Mikoto and Fugaku understood that some traditions, though beautiful on paper, needed to be overcome in contemporary times. They did not object. When, years later, Obito suddenly decided to adopt Sakura after the death of his best friend, Rin, Mikoto also did not object, even though she had some reservations. She talked to her son alone about that decision, but Obito had been determined since childhood: whenever he made a decision, no one could stop him.
So Mikoto and Fugaku also accepted.
And they loved Sakura immensely. The girl was easily welcomed into the family and was raised alongside Sasuke, with whom she shared her age and common interests. Minato and Kushina were mutual friends of Mikoto and Kakashi, and even though the silver-haired alpha was a little younger than the others, their children were now in the same age group. Therefore, Naruto was included in this friendship, the three of them spending time together almost daily until they reached the age of six. And all that changed overnight when Obito was gone.
Mikoto could never bring herself to blame Kakashi. The loss of her son deeply shook a woman who had once been so cheerful. The pain of a mother losing a son who was still so young is immeasurable, and Mikoto was never able to properly overcome that pain, that feeling that she could have done something different to prevent that tragic end — yes. Deep down, all Mikoto felt, and what caused her to develop severe depression, was the worst feeling of all: guilt. She couldn't face Kakashi and Sakura without remembering Obito, even though she knew her son would hate her if he knew how she was treating his family. It only made her hate herself even more.
The solution was to distance herself. To isolate herself. Because whenever Mikoto encountered the Hatakes, she showed anger.
Fugaku and Itachi didn't hate the Hatakes, but they respected the woman. They didn't want her to think they were against her. They knew it was too delicate, and they were feeling pain in the process. In that, ten years passed. And sometimes it seemed that time had actually frozen. Because nothing had really changed, not for the Uchihas. Minato and Kushina had tried to reconnect, as had other friends, but without success. Kakashi remained distant, consumed by guilt and his own grief. The children had no choice but to follow in their parents' footsteps, which is why they were in that situation. But now they were old enough to understand everything: and Sasuke was finally reconnecting.
Naruto was happy for Sakura, but he also wanted to remind Sasuke that they had once been friends. And they could even be more than just friends at sixteen years old. The blond didn't know the other boy's gender, but that was the least important part for Naruto. First, he needed to reconnect with Sasuke in a way that wouldn't scare the dark-haired boy.
Now, with the openness he was showing to Sakura, Naruto already imagined that it would be easier than before, when neither of them spoke like Uchiha. He just needed to find the right moment. Perhaps knowing what Sakura and Sasuke had talked about would help him, but the girl didn't want to share, which was fair. Naruto now understood that the dialogue between the two must not have been about a frivolous subject as he had imagined before, so the question remained: what to talk about with Sasuke, after ten years of only exchanging uncomfortable glances? That was when they looked at each other, because Sasuke was an expert at avoiding eye contact with anyone possible.
Yes, Naruto had watched Sasuke closely during those years, even from afar. That's why he knew details about the boy that were well stored in his mind. He should have spent that energy and focus on his studies, but Sasuke was a much more interesting topic than any school subject.
In fact, not a single day had passed in those last days that Naruto hadn't thought about Sasuke — this is something that recurs in any universe involving the two.
Even when he was involved with other people, such as Hinata, Naruto did not abandon his healthy obsession with Sasuke. He found himself wondering if Sasuke also thought about him. If Sasuke had friends outside of school, why didn't he talk to anyone during school hours — or did he not talk to anyone when Naruto was watching? Not to say that Naruto was exaggerating, he had seen him talking to some seniors, such as Jugo and Suigetsu. He always did his schoolwork with the same girl: Karin, who was not part of Naruto and Sakura's circle of friends. She was friends with the aforementioned seniors, in fact, but Naruto had never seen the four of them together. Sasuke seemed to make a single movement: from school to home, and from home to school. He seemed lonely. Naruto always found himself wanting to go up to him, talk to him, ask him about absolutely everything: if he was okay, how his family was doing, if he was eating well, if Itachi was doing well in college, what movies he had watched, what books he had read, what he wanted to do that weekend...
— Naruto, it's your turn. — Ino snapped her fingers in front of Naruto's face. He was thinking so hard that he didn't even remember returning to the room with Sakura, setting up the game, and starting a match with the girls. They had been playing for over twenty minutes, actually. And Naruto had just acted on autopilot while thinking about Sasuke.
Typical.
— Yeah, sorry — he muttered, rolling the dice and moving the number of spaces that appeared on the sum of the two dice. — Wow, I'm going to lose. — Naruto realized the situation he was in with a pout, now really looking at the piles of money on the board.
— Oh, don't tell me! — Ino scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest. Sakura then giggled, shuffling the cards on the board.
— Naruto, you're going to land on my property again — she said with a mischievous smile on her face. — And you know what happens when someone lands on my property...
— I know, I know! — Naruto raised his hands, pretending to surrender. — You guys are too good at this game! — He was trying to hide how far his mind had taken him seconds ago.
Hinata, sitting next to him on the sofa, squeezed Naruto's hand discreetly, smiling shyly.
— Everything will work out, Naruto-kun... — she whispered softly, almost only for him to hear. Naruto didn't hear her.
He rolled the dice again, and the sound of the pieces hitting the board echoed through the silent room, everyone watching the alpha's move.
— Are you serious? — he muttered discontentedly, looking at the card he had just drawn: — Advance to City Hall Square.
— Relax, Naruto, it's part of the game... — Sakura pretended to be soothing, trying to hide her smile.
— Part of the game? — Naruto repeated, looking as if he were paying attention to an epic battle. — This looks like war!
Hinata giggled shyly and leaned her head on his shoulder, which blushed slightly, as if she had only just noticed his presence beside her at that moment, with that unexpected gesture.
— You'll end up winning, with Hinata by your side like that — Ino teased, giggling in the same tone.
— Yeah... Maybe. — Naruto didn't look at the girl with her head resting on his shoulder, but ended up giving that answer so as not to embarrass her in front of Ino. Sakura held back a sigh, with an uncomfortable certainty that the story of the two would not end the way she would like, unfortunately.
The girls' laughter filled the room as the movie continued to play on TV, the dim light reflecting off the boards and scattered cards. Naruto's parents were home, but happily secluded in their upstairs bedroom, blissfully unaware of the Monopoly War that had taken over their living room. They continued playing until the movie ended, when everyone decided to go to sleep: and they did so right there, with mattresses laid out neatly on the living room floor.
Sleeping between Ino and Naruto, or rather, trying to sleep between them, Sakura soon noticed that something was strange. It turns out that she had known Uzumaki her whole life, and at this point, she was more than capable of pointing out when something was wrong. So, during the night, after Ino and Hinata fell asleep like rocks, she knew that Naruto was just tossing and turning on the mattress, unable to sleep. She knew that he hadn't forgotten their conversation in his room, and besides, there was something she had to tell Naruto. About Kakashi.
That's right. Sakura hadn't shared the big news yet.
So, all she had to do was get up quietly and walk to the kitchen, which was far from the living room — thank God — for Naruto to follow her. She poured two glasses of water and handed one of them to the blond. If anyone showed up, they could just say they were there to drink water.
— Naruto, I'm going to tell you what I talked about with Sasuke... — She got straight to the point, whispering. That sentence was enough to make his face light up as he watched Sakura drink the water. — But this stays between us.
— Of course, of course! You can trust me! — He bowed as he whispered the answer, unable to contain the smile on his face. Sakura rolled her eyes.
— The conversation wasn't about him. I hope that doesn't disappoint you... The conversation was about me. — She sighed. — It turns out that this week, I found out who Iruka-sensei's boyfriend is.
Naruto's eyes widened, then he blinked a few times as he digested the information.
— Iruka-sensei's boyfriend? — The boy repeated, unable to conceive of the connection between the teacher's boyfriend, Sakura, and Sasuke. Sakura nodded.
— Yes. — She finished drinking the water in her glass and set it down on the counter next to them. — Iruka-sensei's boyfriend is my father.
Naruto just stared at her silently, his face static as her words repeated inside his head, like an echo in an empty cave. Until he finally processed it, and his eyes widened even more.
— Kakashi-san??! — His voice escaped a little from the whisper tone and Sakura had to cover his mouth with both hands, frowning at her friend. They remained silent for five minutes; fortunately, Naruto's near-scream did not wake any of the girls in the room.
— Yes, idiot. Please don't forget not to shout. — She moved away, releasing his mouth and taking a step back.
— But... How? What do you mean? When did that happen? Isn't Iruka-sensei super young?! And what does all this have to do with Sasuke??
— Naruto, my father isn't old, even though he is older than Iruka, yes. Anyway, do you want to know how this relates to Sasuke, or are you going to keep interrupting me?
— Okay, go on. Sorry. — Naruto laughed awkwardly, this time determined to keep quiet while listening to Sakura.
— I found a book I'd never seen before among my father's things this week. He wasn't even home; he was on duty. When I picked up the book, it had Iruka-sensei's stamp on it. So I put the pieces together, you know? That little note Iruka received, you were the only person who read it. If I had read it, I would have recognized his handwriting. I noticed how different my father was after that dinner with Iruka, too. It was right after dinner that he started going out more, and he was always very well-groomed and happy... I know I should have been happy for him, and I am, but my first reaction was to feel betrayed. It seems selfish and childish, but, I don't know... I was afraid of feeling lonely again. Just like when... You know. — Sakura shrugged — That's why I didn't want to go with you guys at recess yesterday. Then Sasuke came to talk to me because he noticed I was down.
— I noticed too — Naruto pouted, and Sakura laughed softly.
— I know, but you respected my need for alone time. Sasuke... He wanted to get closer to me, and I didn't push him away because that would have been the last thing I wanted to do. So I kind of told him everything about it. Even though he's ignored us all these years, in fact, I think that's mainly why I couldn't not tell him. Because he finally showed that he was seeing me. I felt recognized, seen, by him, by my friend. So I told him, and he... He knew! About the two of them!
— What? — Naruto wasn't expecting that twist.
— He told me he had seen the two of them... Actually, at the science fair, when my father coincidentally disappeared with Iruka-sensei, they were locked in the music room. Sasuke opened the door for them and they were “kind of making out” inside. That's what he told me.
Naruto couldn't contain his laughter and had to cover his mouth as he chuckled softly.
— That caught me off guard.
— Imagine me! But it's okay. I felt even more betrayed at the time, because not only did I not know when it started, it meant that my father's relationship with Iruka was already advanced... And my father left me in the dark. Just like he always did. Just like you already know. Sasuke listened to me and said he feels a little like that too, but I reassured him that he was never alone... I think he wants to get closer again. Really.
— Finally. — Naruto smiled slightly, realizing that Sakura was calmer with this information. — And did you talk to your father?
— I did. And it's for real. They're going out and everything.
— Everything...?
— Yeah. I don't want to overthink it, but saying that makes me think about the things they do.
— Sakura, Iruka-sensei is our teacher.
— And Kakashi is my father.
— Can we change the subject?
— Please, thank you very much.
The two laughed softly, Naruto finally finished drinking his water and put the glass next to Sakura's.
— Do you think Sasuke... would get closer to me too? — Sakura didn't know, but his heart skipped a beat at that moment. As much as he wanted to scold Naruto, Sasuke had also been his friend once. They shared the same feeling of wanting to get closer to Uchiha.
— I think so. — She paused to think. — Just don't do anything that might pressure him. Nothing has been easy for him. His family... They never got over it. I don't think I got over it either, but they... They couldn't even move on. That's very sad. — She shrugged. — But he's changed. He even asked me not to be too hard on my father, because I was honestly really angry.
— I can imagine. And were you hard on him?
— Maybe a little. — She sighed. — But we worked it out.
— I'm happy for you, Saku-chan. — The two exchanged a smile, and then a hug. Naruto was a few inches taller than Sakura, which made it easy for her to snuggle up against him. The two were like siblings, exchanging brotherly affection since childhood. — Things are kind of getting back on track, huh? Even for your dad...
— Ah, Naruto... We all deserve it. — She smiled against his shoulder. — I've made it clear that I'll kill Iruka if he hurts my dad. — Naruto chuckled softly.
— What if your father hurts Iruka-sensei? — The blond asked. — We'll still be friends after I punch Uncle Kakashi, won't we? Iruka-sensei is almost like a father to me. Or an older brother... I don't know. But he's very special to me.
Sakura knew the story and nodded, still hugging her friend. She laughed softly, even though that thought made her a little pensive: what if her father really broke Iruka's heart by being too reserved?
— We'd still be friends, Naruto. — That was all she said before letting go of the hug and finally suggesting that they go back to sleep in the living room.
{...}
[4 years ago]
Iruka had started teaching at Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke's school shortly after completing his degree in Biology and entering a master's program under Orochimaru's guidance. He had discovered while still in college that he loved children because of the internships he had done. He had managed to get a job as a science teacher for elementary and middle school classes and was now in his second week of classes. He was enjoying the environment; the school was huge. He also liked the students; most of them seemed interested, although there were those who didn't pay much attention. The teaching and pedagogical staff was very receptive, everyone very willing to help him with any questions. He was getting along quite well with the Japanese language teacher, Yuhi Kurenai. She was kind and had recently returned from maternity leave; her daughter, Mirai, had just turned one year old. It wouldn't be long before Iruka considered himself the little girl's uncle, and she would fall in love with him too.
When he met the boys, they were all around eleven and twelve years old, which put them in the seventh grade. Their personalities hadn't changed much since then: Sakura was intelligent and participatory; Naruto was impulsive and outgoing, always trying to keep up with the pink-haired girl, and Sasuke... Sasuke was quiet. Iruka liked their class very much from the beginning, trying to see each student for their individuality from day one.
Although Naruto had many friends, Iruka soon realized that whenever the boy made a comment, some students in a specific corner of the room would let out some mocking giggles. He loved working in schools, but he understood that this type of behavior would always be present, even though Iruka despised it. He was aware that, no matter how hard he tried, he would never change that reality, unfortunately. People can be mean to each other from a young age.
Even with those comments, Naruto wasn't the type of person to hold back—Iruka noticed that too. It reminded him of himself, and it made his heart ache. He thought it was adorable that, even with those clearly mean comments, Naruto tried to be friends with everyone. He had Sakura, that was obvious, but whenever he had the chance, he tried to interact with that little group, as if questioning why they were a little mean to him with those small acts of kindness. Naruto always tried to exchange snacks or everyday questions for twelve-year-olds, and even though he never received kindness in return, he never gave up. Every gesture the boy made — offering snacks, smiling, asking simple questions to his classmates — seemed to defy malice with courageous innocence...
At that time, Naruto was very small. He didn't have a growth spurt until he was sixteen. Before that, even Hinata was taller than him. This made Naruto the perfect target for bullying.
Iruka ended up witnessing one of these moments.
The last morning bell had just rung, signaling the end of morning classes, and most of the students were already dispersing through the hallways, rushing to leave school or run to their numerous after-school activities. Naruto, however, remained in the classroom to organize his materials. Sakura, anxious as always, had already left with her other friends to tidy up the chess club room; at that time, she was the school champion in the sport. The blond was so focused on his task that he didn't notice when the group that always enjoyed mocking him for his interventions in class approached him, clearly with unpleasant intentions.
— Hey, shorty! — one of them called, already laughing. — You're going to knock everything over again, you useless fool! — Another boy poked Naruto, also joining in the harsh laughter.
Naruto's heart raced at the sudden touches and realization. He instinctively backed away, abandoning the task of organizing and actually knocking some books to the floor, but the boys surrounded him, blocking his exit, their laughter becoming more malicious. Then the actions escalated to small shoves and psychological taunts that made him feel even smaller, totally paralyzed. That was because Naruto couldn't understand where all that hatred came from, when all he had done during that time — classes had barely resumed after the holidays, in fact — was act like himself. What could be so wrong with being a child like him? What had he done so wrong by trying to talk to those boys or by trying to answer the teachers' questions, even if his answers were wrong? What was so wrong with being like him?
Across the hall, Iruka returned to the classroom — he had forgotten a pen on the desk during the penultimate class. As soon as he slid the door open to enter the room, his eyes fell on the scene. An immediate tightness gripped his chest. He recognized that feeling, that vulnerability he had known so well in his own childhood. Without hesitation, he quickly advanced toward the group that was cowardly surrounding Naruto.
— Hey! Stop that right now. — His firm voice cut through the room, causing the group to stop smiling. All faces turned back toward Iruka, now standing in the open doorway. The teacher entered the room, his arms crossed in front of his chest.
He stood firmly between Naruto and his classmates, conveying protection without raising his voice. His hand rested lightly on the blond's shoulder, silently offering reassurance.
— This isn't funny. Naruto deserves respect, just like any one of you. This kind of behavior is not tolerated here at school. We will have to contact your parents so that the situation does not escalate. Go immediately to Principal Hiruzen's office. If you don't, it will be worse for you, boys.
Naruto looked at him, eyes wide. For the first time, he felt not only relief, but also that someone really understood him — someone who knew what it was like to be small in the face of evil. The boys who had been surrounding him moments before knew they had no choice but to obey Iruka. The punishment for bullying was really very severe. Many students were afraid to report such behavior for fear of what the bullies might do if they felt angry, but Iruka knew what happened when they kept quiet. He would not let those boys bother anyone ever again. He would protect Naruto in every way possible.
After the group was properly escorted to Hiruzen's office with the help of one of the hallway monitors who happened to be passing by, Iruka crouched down next to Naruto. The boy was still quiet, somewhat paralyzed by having been defended in such an unexpected way, but it had happened naturally, without him having to ask Iruka to take that action. That had never happened before, only with adults who were part of his family. Iruka was just his teacher — Naruto had never met a teacher who really recognized him, who saw him as an individual with feelings, far beyond someone who needed to pass on content, until he met Iruka-sensei.
— I know how much it hurts... But you're not alone, Naruto. I'm here. — He smiled without showing his teeth, then picked up some books from the floor to help Naruto with the organization that had been interrupted. After placing the books on the table, Iruka brought a hand to his face, caressing his cheek with his thumb in an almost maternal gesture. — Did they hurt you? You need to tell me what they did, okay? — He wasn't demanding, he just wanted to know. He sounded concerned, and that was really how he felt about each of his students.
Naruto took a deep breath, absorbing every word and the protective touch. Instinctively, Naruto realized that there was nothing wrong with being himself, acting as he wanted, being the child he was, interacting with his friends and teachers as he did, because that was the way he felt good. That was because there were people like Iruka and Sakura who recognized him and would protect him, no matter what the circumstances. At that moment, a silent bond was born — made of care, protection, and trust — which, years later, would become essential to the boy's life. And he would never forget what Iruka-sensei did for him at the end of that class.
{...}
Iruka arrived at work on Monday with his head anywhere but in reality. He was on cloud nine from everything he had experienced with Kakashi that weekend, but as soon as he got home, he bit his nails to the point of almost leaving them raw.
His mother had a trip to Japan scheduled for that Monday.
She would leave São Paulo at night, Brazilian time, which meant she would arrive in Tokyo the next morning. The time zone is a little confusing, but what happens is that a day of travel would pass for her, but she would “gain” an extra day. Upon returning to Brazil, she would “lose” a day. Time zones are the least understood human invention, honestly. Iruka was trying to reconcile his daily tasks with that realization, but it was impossible.
He was so distracted that he didn't even celebrate with Kurenai when Hiruzen informed everyone on the team that Mizuki had returned to Osaka that weekend, as his activities as a “consultant” had been terminated due to a cut in some scholarships by the university. This meant that her ex-boyfriend would no longer be around to pester Iruka's memories. Not that the omega would still feel attacked by him after the final point he had made at the lab celebration, but his presence was unpleasant anyway.
On Sunday, he and Kakashi had breakfast together, watched movies after walking Pakkun around the neighborhood, had lunch with the leftovers from Dinner — which were delicious even reheated — and said goodbye around five in the afternoon, as Kakashi needed to pick up Sakura at Naruto's house. They exchanged hugs and a few kisses, like a couple in love, until Iruka had to get into Mochi and drive home.
At least he drove happily accompanied by Taylor Swift playing at full volume on the radio.
At home, he had to pamper Chibi with affection and treats for letting her sleep alone that night.
— Next time, I'll take you to sleep with us, daughter... — He promised the kitten. He was so happy that even after opening his email inbox, not even Kabuto's angry emails bothered him. He replied promptly, promising that he would make the adjustments to the article and spreadsheets on Monday as soon as he arrived. He also replied to Orochimaru's emails asking him to evaluate the photos of some snakes he had taken on his last field trip. The photos were incredible, but the emails had been sent early Saturday morning. Iruka could only wonder if Orochimaru really did nothing but breathe for his research.
What really woke Iruka from that dream were the twenty missed calls from his mother accompanied by those two messages from Tsunade.
He hadn't even told his parents about the news.
The omega then tried to call the woman back, but without success. So he called his father, who answered on the first ring.
— Hi, Dad! How are you? Is my mother with you?
— Wow, Iruka. Good morning to you too. — He had even forgotten about the time difference. — How nice it is to be loved by my only son...
— I'm sorry, Dad.
— You owe me a lot of apologies, actually. Your mother was very upset. You owe us.
Iruka sighed.
— I know I should have told you, but so much has happened, Dad... I never expected her pheromones to be emitted like that, out of nowhere! Not even Tsunade expected it, and she's the best in Japan.
— It's understandable. But lately you've barely spoken to us, I think that's why she was a little upset. Your mother. You know how she is... She loves you very much. Coming here, even though it was our decision, was kind of hard for her. She wanted to go back many times.
Iruka's heart tightened. He wouldn't mind if she came back...
— I'm really sorry, Dad. I didn't mean to hurt you guys.
— I know, sweetheart. — A pause. Iruka knew his father probably had his typical affectionate smile on his face right now. — But how has it been? Are you feeling very uncomfortable? — Another pause. — Does your alpha boyfriend help you?
Iruka blushed even though his father couldn't see him.
— Dad! — He said in a reproachful tone, laughing nervously. But he knew those questions were out of concern and curiosity, since both his parents were betas. — I felt a little discomfort, but Tsunade prescribed me some good suppressants. It turns out my body never emitted pheromones, I never went into heat, so the adaptation isn't stable. I'm still going to go through heat, and Tsunade said it won't be easy, because it's probably all built up and needs to come out somehow... — He bit his lower lip. — He's not my boyfriend. We're getting to know each other.
— Correction: he's not your boyfriend yet.
— Yeah... Something like that. — Iruka shrugged. — My mom doesn't want to talk to me because she's upset?
— No, Iruka, not at all. She's on her way to São Paulo right now. Our house is on the beach, so it takes a while to get to the capital. She's already left and will catch her flight tomorrow. That means she'll arrive on Tuesday morning. I know you have a lot of classes, but try to set aside some time to pick her up, okay? I couldn't go because I have classes to teach at the university, for the postgraduate program. It would be kind of annoying to cancel.
Iruka opened and closed his mouth a few times.
She was already coming, without warning him. Not that he could complain too much, because he had been leaving his parents in the dark for months. Iruka thought about complaining about this detail to his father, but he already knew what the man would say: she had called him twenty times during the day in Japan, and Iruka had not answered. Nor had he returned her calls, because he was with Kakashi. That wouldn't help the situation he was in at all.
He said goodbye to his father as affectionately as he could, and since then, he had been living his reality in a relatively detached way. Not that Iruka was afraid of his mother, not at all, she was the most loving woman in the world, but he wasn't ready to welcome her so suddenly. He didn't know how he would face her after she found out from Tsunade everything he was going through. He felt like the worst son in the world for hiding all that essential information from her—it hadn't been fair to Umino Kohari at all.
Iruka arrived completely unprepared for class that Monday morning. So he did the same thing in every class he entered: he asked the students to pair up and answer exercises from a random page while he remained seated at the teacher's desk in front of his laptop with the messaging app open, chatting with his mother. But no messages from her reached him.
The students, on the other hand, were happy with the dynamics of the class. Except for Sakura, everyone seemed oblivious to Iruka's nervousness — even Naruto, who idolized him, was more focused on watching Sasuke. The black-haired boy was paired with Karin on the other side of the room, while Naruto's partner was Hinata. What Sakura had said to him over the weekend had not left his mind: he needed to be more honest with Hinata. They had been dating for months, but Naruto really did not intend to pursue a serious relationship with her... And the girl was on a completely different wavelength.
There was nothing wrong with Hinata. She was perfect, come to think of it: attentive, beautiful, intelligent... She and Naruto seemed, from a distance, like the perfect couple. That is, if Naruto's heart hadn't had other plans: he watched Sasuke and, even though they were separated by many desks, he could see every little detail about the other boy. The way he leaned a little too far over the table to write, how he impatiently brushed the strands of hair from his eyes multiple times until he got tired, how he sighed discreetly when he heard something from Karin that was probably just teasing him, the anxious back and forth of his left leg — a nervous tic he had had for a few years. Naruto was able to lose himself in observing Sasuke's smallest and largest details.
— Naruto-kun? — Hinata's voice, which had sounded distant before, now sounded close, pulling the alpha out of his reverie.
— Hi, Hinata... Sorry, I was lost in thought.
— It's okay. Did you read question three? — She held out the book to him, who had forced himself to look at her.
— No... I'll read it now.
— Okay, I'll wait for you — she said politely, a small smile appearing on her pretty face. Naruto smiled back awkwardly, taking the book and reading the question to himself. Not that he knew the answer, and even if he did, his mind was occupied by one person.
Sasuke, on the other side of the room, could feel Naruto's gaze burning into him. But he would rather, as always, ignore that kind of thing. Because he knew that Naruto was only fascinated by him because they no longer knew each other as they did in childhood. Besides, everyone knew about Naruto and Hinata. Sasuke didn't want to be hated for “getting between them.” The most rational thing was to stay away, which wasn't complicated, since that's what he had been doing for years.
Little did he know that Naruto was about to start making what he had been doing so masterfully difficult.
The bell rang for recess, and with the permission of a very distracted Iruka-sensei, the students tidied up their desks and quickly went out into the hallway. Sasuke, as usual, was accustomed to spending his free time inside the classroom. He and Sakura exchanged a small smile and a nod, but she was leaving the room accompanied by Ino. Sasuke took his sketchbook out of his backpack and was about to open it when Naruto sat down in front of him, his body completely turned toward Sasuke.
— Hi. — The blond stared at him with those stupid blue eyes and that stupid friendly smile. Sasuke didn't have an immediate reaction.
— Hi...
— Can we talk?
— I wasn't really in the mood. — Sasuke decided to be direct. Naruto's smile, however, did not waver.
— Oh, come on. You don't want to ignore me forever, do you?
— Ignore you? We're not even friends anymore...
— But we can be again, Sasuke. — The omega didn't know where that alpha was getting so much courage from. He knew it probably had something to do with the fact that he was getting closer to Sakura again, even though Naruto wasn't the type to take advantage of the situation. Besides, it would be a blatant lie for Sasuke to say he didn't miss Naruto too. — Give me a chance. — The blond almost pouted, his blue eyes shining as if he were a begging puppy.
Sasuke just felt a chill run through his body: what was supposed to be adorable had the opposite effect on Uchiha.
— Acting like this won't get you anything from me.” — He got up, taking his notebook with him. — See you later, Naruto. — Sasuke then left, abandoning Naruto in his chair. He turned to the table and laid his head on it, muttering.
Still, Naruto had no intention of giving up. He didn't feel that Sasuke had completely rejected him. He just said “Acting like this...”
So Naruto should act differently.
— Naruto? Is everything okay? — Iruka-sensei's familiar voice filled his ears, causing Naruto to raise his head. He was so focused on talking to Sasuke after all these years that he didn't even notice that, despite the bell ringing, the teacher was still in the room. And he had seen everything that had happened. Iruka's hair was loose that morning, and since Naruto was unable to perceive the aura of anxiety that surrounded him, he only noticed how Iruka seemed to be brighter on that particular Monday.
— Yes, sensei... I just got the cold shoulder. But it's temporary.
Iruka chuckled softly. He could only think that only Naruto would be able to make him laugh in the situation he was in.
— A cold shoulder from Sasuke, hm? You and Sakura really are best friends.
— Yeah. — He shrugged. — You know how it is. We have to get the trio back together.
— I couldn't agree more... Just... Don't pressure him, okay? He's been through a lot.
— I know. But it's been ten years...
— These things don't have a deadline, Naruto. — Iruka sighed. — And you also have to understand that in ten years... a lot changes. You, Sasuke, and Sakura have changed a lot. That won't stop you from being friends, but you have to know that you won't be the same friends you were in childhood. You are all new versions of yourselves. It's this version of Sasuke that you need to recognize, not just “know.”
— Sensei, everything you say is very beautiful, but it's also very complicated.
Iruka laughed once more.
— You'll understand. Now, enjoy this break. The class after mine is Gai's, and he won't let you rest...”
— Eyebrow Sensei... — Naruto muttered and got up, dragging himself to the door. Then he stopped, turning to Iruka. — Even though I don't understand everything you said yet, thank you, Iruka-sensei. You know you were the first teacher who really... really saw me, right? And that kind of... — Naruto blushed a little — It totally changed my life. I can never thank you enough.
Iruka was so taken aback that his heart raced, filling with an inexplicable tenderness and warmth. If he hadn't been so nervous about other things, he would have cried right there.
— You don't have to thank me, Naruto. — The two exchanged one last knowing, brotherly, genuine smile before the boy went to recess. Iruka put his hand to his chest, feeling lighter, more fulfilled for a few moments. That was the purpose he wanted to pursue as a teacher. And everything became even more special when he remembered himself when he looked at Naruto. And he remembered that when he was even younger than him, all he wanted was for someone to have welcomed him in the same way at school.
{...}
[14 years ago]
When Iruka was twelve years old, he hated going to school. Recess seemed like a noisy and hostile world to little Umino. Every laugh from a classmate, every quick step sounded like a silent accusation directed at him. It all started on the first day of school, when everyone introduced themselves and the class quickly discovered that he was the son of a couple of immigrants. It didn't matter that his grandparents, both maternal and paternal, were Japanese. His parents had been born in another country: that was enough. In addition, Iruka's skin was darker. His brown eyes differed from the others, as did his hair. He exuded an exotic air around his classmates; he was not like the others.
He was different. Iruka knew it — and his “friends” didn't let him forget it. They didn't want him to forget.
Every time he wanted to take notes in class — and it was always, because he always loved school — someone made fun of his accent. Yes, he spoke a little differently because he grew up in an entirely bilingual environment. Trilingual, in fact, since his parents mixed Japanese, English, and Brazilian Portuguese. At the age of eight, Iruka was already developing the ability to be fluent in all three languages, but it didn't happen “cleanly.” One language challenges the other, influences the other, each has its own structure and system, and Iruka was assimilating three simultaneously.
He couldn't understand what was so wrong, so sinful about it, or whatever it was, he couldn't really understand what he could have done to be the target of those taunts. All he did was be himself — just like Naruto felt. Iruka would see a mirror in the Uzumaki boy years later. But he wouldn't let things reach the same level as in the past, he hadn't let it, and he sighed with relief every day because of that. Because he carried a physical memory of what had happened: the scar that nowadays looked more like a drawing on his own face. Iruka didn't romanticize it, but it did become a feature of himself that he learned to like, and later, to love very much.
But for many years he hated that scar with all his heart.
The giggles he always heard after interacting with teachers increased: later, they became malicious comments among the other preteens. This is probably the worst phase of children's lives, as they can all be terrible to each other.
— Look at the little foreigner trying to speak Japanese! — he once heard after answering a question from the teacher during one of his science classes, one of his favorite subjects since childhood. Some classmates echoed a chorus of laughter.
Iruka swallowed his urge to cry, clutching his arms against his body, remaining seated at his desk. He tried to convince himself that it wasn't his fault, but the accumulated humiliation burned in his chest. He felt like shutting himself off forever at times like this, but he loved being himself too much. Whenever he came home, his parents waited eagerly for him, ready to hear everything he had learned at school. And Iruka had always loved sharing absolutely everything with them, ever since he was very young. He didn't want a little bit of bullying to ruin such a happy and precious moment with his little family.
So he ignored the comments, ignored those boys. He walked alone, ate alone, did his homework alone. He didn't want to bother his teachers or his parents, he didn't want to ruin the moments of pleasure with other people, since he found no welcome among children his age. Still, Iruka never considered himself a sad child, just... lonely. He valued his family above all else. But the other children didn't understand him as someone who just wanted to be left alone. It seemed that Iruka, by just staying quiet, was provoking them back.
And none of them wanted that to happen. They didn't like Iruka thinking he was superior for acting mildly — not that he thought he was superior. He would never think that.
He still remembered that particular day in vivid detail. Morning classes were over, and he always went home for lunch with his parents. He carried his backpack on his back and a literature book in his hands, walking silently along the familiar path to the cozy little house he shared with his parents at the time. He was about to turn the corner of his house when he was intercepted by the group that always mocked him. Iruka took a step back, trying to get away, but he soon discovered that there was another boy behind him as well. They had cornered him.
— Why don't you go back to your country instead of bothering us, you jerk? — One of the boys accused Iruka, spitting the words in his face.
— I... I never bothered you... — The boy replied softly, his voice already faltering from the tears welling up in his eyes.
— Are you sure? You think you're superior because you can answer all the questions, you're always ready to help the teachers... Why don't you bother to hide that disgusting accent of yours? Another boy pushed Iruka by the shoulders, making him cringe.
— I can't control it...
— But you should! Aren't you the one who knows everything? — The first boy growled and then took something metallic out of his pocket. — Since you won't do it willingly, we'll teach you the hard way. You stupid immigrant.
Iruka quickly realized that the metal object was a pocket knife. One of the boys knocked his book to the ground and another took his backpack off his back. They held him by the arms, and seconds later, a sharp pain shot through his face. Iruka began to cry immediately as the pocket knife cut from one cheek to the other, slowly crossing the bridge of his nose. It burned like fire, and the shock left him motionless, his eyes wide and teary. Blood flowed hot, and the world seemed to spin around him. The blood soon mixed with tears, but Iruka felt nothing anymore.
Once the cut was finished, the boys threw Iruka to the ground and ran away. Overcome with shock, he just picked up the literature book and put it in his backpack. He dragged himself home, his eyes empty. The scream his mother let out when she welcomed him home still gave Iruka nightmares even as an adult. He hugged her, crying, seeking comfort while his chest ached, because he never wanted to leave her like this. Even though it wasn't his fault, Iruka never wanted to cause his parents trouble. He tried to be strong, to ignore it, to support himself, but it hadn't been enough, and now his parents were having to deal with this problem, which was him. Iruka now knew that he was just a child who didn't recognize himself as a child. It wasn't his parents' fault, nor his own. Perhaps it was the fault of those who had attacked him, first with words and then with actions. But he had promised that he would not let any of his students go through a situation like that, not while he was a teacher.
As for Iruka's mother, she had sworn that she would always protect him — but he complicated things whenever he hid what was important from her. But she was determined never to let that happen again, even if fourteen years later something similar were to happen again. Iruka hid something important from her again, and Kohari could just blame herself.
Notes:
Hi! How are you?
I made a small change to my plans. This chapter was going to focus more on Iruka's mother's arrival, but I really wanted to include these flashbacks. I hope you liked it!!!!
I'm always open to constructive criticism <3
Thanks again for all the kudos and comments!!!!!!!!! It's really motivating to receive all this affection. You guys are amazing.
I created a X account in case anyone wants to interact with me there and in order to perhaps talk about the fics there! If you got interested here is the link https://x.com/irukete?s=21 🥹
This Friday is my girlfriend's birthday, so I'll TRY to update before then, but if I don't show up by Thursday, the next chapter will probably only come out in the middle of next week (don't hate me, I'm just very romantic, so the whole weekend will be for my girl, hehe).
Kisses!!!!!! I love you guys, dear ones!!!!!!!!!
PS: As you know, Iruka's mother hardly appears in the anime, so I made up a personality for her completely from my own imagination. I'm already anxious to hear what you guys think, hehe. how would you all imagine her????
Chapter 20: Prospects
Summary:
Kakashi and Kohari meet each other.
Notes:
I hope you enjoy the chapter! <3
song: Good Old-Fashioned Lover - Queen.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Oh love, (there he goes again) oh lover boy
What're doing tonight? Hey, boy
Everything is alright, just hold on tight
That's because I'm a good old fashioned (fashioned) lover boy
— I'm really sorry to let you down like this. I... I took a while to believe that she was really coming so soon.
— It's okay, Iruka. It's your mother. You don't have to worry about me...
— Won't Sakura be upset with me?
— She was looking forward to dinner again, especially now that she knows the truth, but we'll have other opportunities, won't we?
— Yes. — He had paused before speaking — I feel bad...
— I've canceled on you before, 'Ruka. — Kakashi's voice was soft. He was working at the time, but Iruka had sent him a text message with the following words: “Can I call you? Only if you're not too busy. I don't want to bother you.” And he was terrible at saying no to Iruka. And he was an expert at ignoring the pile of work in front of him: reports, requests... Kakashi wasn't bad at his job, on the contrary, he was too good. And even a good person can feel a little lazy sometimes. — But if your mother wants to have dinner with us, you are more than welcome at our house. You know that. However, talk to her first. See if she's not tired. It's a whole day on a plane...
— I'll talk to her. It's not that I don't want you to meet, but I think I should prepare you first. Umino Kohari is not an easy woman, you know...
— I'm already prepared, ‘Ruka. Are you trying to scare me by talking about your mother?
— What do you mean? Can't my mother be scary? Actually, she's not... But she's a journalist. She knows how to investigate well. She also knows how to ask the right questions to get the answers she wants without you realizing it. It's like, you're talking and suddenly you realize you've been in an interrogation for thirty minutes.
— My love, I do interrogations every day.
A long pause followed between them.
— Iruka? — Kakashi called, thinking maybe the call had dropped.
— N-nothing... — He contradicted himself in the next second. — You called me “my love.”
— Yes. — A smile appeared on Kakashi's lips. He could imagine Iruka blushing down to his chest. — Did you like it? I can call you that all the time...
— No! I mean, I loved it. But don't call me that all the time. Save it for special moments.
— You got it, my love.
— I'm going to hang up now, Kakashi-san. Professor Orochimaru is waiting for me. I'm going to work double today so I don't have to come to the university tomorrow.
— Okay, Iruka. Good job. — A pause. — I miss you already.
— Me too. — The answer came awkwardly, but lovingly. Just like Iruka. The call ended and Kakashi moved the phone away from his ear, staring at it in front of his body, still holding the device in his hands. He was inside his own office at the police station, standing in front of a desk piled high with stacks and stacks of papers patiently awaiting the inspector's analysis. It was at that moment that Yamato opened the door: he had been tapping discreetly on the wood, but Kakashi hadn't heard because he was on the phone.
— Excuse me, senpai. — The subordinate entered, somewhat awkwardly. However, his posture changed completely when he saw that Kakashi was smiling at the phone. — What happened? — He sounded... Concerned.
— What do you mean, Tenzo?
— Well, you're smiling at the phone. We've worked together for years and this has never happened before. What happened? Are you okay?
— Of course I'm okay — Kakashi replied automatically, finally putting his cell phone in his pants pocket. — What's wrong with smiling?
— Nothing, absolutely nothing. It's just not like you. — Yamato shrugged, and then his dark eyes lit up with an idea that popped into his mind. He looked at Kakashi out of the corner of his eye. — Are you dating someone? Is that why you're smiling?
Kakashi rolled his eyes.
— Did the reason you came into my office have anything to do with my personal life?
— Not initially. But things change, they evolve. So now it does. — Yamato crossed his arms over his chest. — Since you didn't give me an answer, I'll assume yes. You're dating someone. Something tells me I know them...
— You do. But what are you doing here?
— How do you expect me to answer that after telling me I know the person?
— Because I'm your boss.
— That's really irrefutable. — Yamato shrugged. — I promise I'll find out. Eventually.
— Good luck. — Kakashi took his seat at the desk and motioned for Yamato to sit across from him. The other officer explained the reason that had brought him to his office, something really serious and important, but Kakashi's mind inevitably wandered to Iruka and the omega's mother, Kohari. He didn't know her face or the sound of her voice, but he couldn't stop thinking about her.
Maybe he should send a message to Iruka, saying that he had to invite Kohari to dinner, because Kakashi wanted to meet her as soon as possible. He just didn't do it because he knew that Iruka saw his family twice a year at most, and he had to respect his space. Kakashi hadn't felt anxious about something that didn't involve Sakura or something related to his family in a long time, so this was new. And it was nice to feel that way again.
It was still something unprecedented: he had never experienced this before, not even with Obito. He had met his late husband in childhood, and consequently, Mikoto had been a presence in all stages of his life until Obito's death. He had never had to be formally introduced to a mother-in-law before: he had always known Mikoto. Now, he found himself wondering about her personality, her traits — he had seen photos of Iruka with his family, but now he couldn't remember; he must have lingered on the image of Iruka's mother — and the possible conversations Umino Kohari would have with him. Would Iruka be like her in manner, or perhaps more like his father?
Kakashi wanted to know everything immediately—he hadn't paid attention to a word Tenzo had said, and the rest of his shift had passed in the same way, until the time he had arranged to pick up Sakura from school. The pink-haired girl was already waiting for her father at the school gate, sitting on a stool there while reading something on the white Kindle that had been a birthday gift from her grandfather. She looked up as soon as Kakashi honked softly twice to announce his arrival, and Sakura walked to the car, getting into the passenger seat.
— Hi, Dad.
— Hi, teacup. How were your classes?
— Fine. How was work?
— Fine too. — Kakashi was already driving. He hadn't put any music on the radio, he was driving in complete silence. His head was already noisy enough. Sakura seemed to agree, staring at her father out of the corner of her eye.
— Really okay? — She narrowed her green eyes. — You seem... distracted.
— Why?
— I can't say exactly. I just know because I know you, Dad. — She leaned back in her seat and finally turned on the radio, playing some Queen songs via Bluetooth. — Iruka-sensei was also distracted today. You guys are okay, right?
— Yes, dear. Nothing happened between us... It's just that Iruka's mother is coming to visit him. She decided at the last minute. — Kakashi shrugged. — He won't be able to come to dinner tomorrow, either. Why don't you invite some friends? Ino, Naruto?
— Gee, I wanted to see Iruka, but I understand. His mother is coming from another continent... — Sakura bit the inside of her cheek. — Dad, can I invite Sasuke?
Kakashi frowned, his thoughts now completely focused on the moment.
— Sasuke?
Sakura laughed softly, smiling awkwardly.
— Yeah... We're talking again. — She was still smiling, her shoulders hunched. Kakashi's gaze shifted between the traffic and his teenage daughter. — I think it's thanks to Iruka-sensei, actually. He talked to me, then to Sasuke, and... Sasuke came to talk to me. Of his own accord! After all these years...
— I'm very happy for you, dear. It's okay to call him. Invite him now, okay? — Kakashi bit his lower lip. — His parents might not like it. You know that. But it doesn't hurt to invite him.
— I will. Thank you, Dad. — Her chest was filled with a warmth that only the return of a cherished friendship could bring. — Sasuke's parents are traveling. Itachi is on vacation here, so he won't mind. Sasuke told me that in a message. — They had been talking since the day Sakura found out about Kakashi and Iruka: Sasuke had sent her a message after getting her number from the list of participants in the class group on the messaging app.
— Great. So, I can confirm him already.
— Yes. But I'll invite him now so he knows about the dinner. — The two exchanged a chuckle, the melody of “Under Pressure” filling the spacious interior of the luxury car.
{...}
The next day, at six o'clock sharp, Iruka was standing in front of the arrival gates at Tokyo International Airport in Ota. He had talked not only to Kakashi, but also to Genma the day before. Iruka's friend was substituting for him at school that morning, so he was calm about classes. He definitely owed him one more favor. As he waited for his mother's arrival, the space around him seemed to pulsate in constant motion: suitcases rolling on hurried wheels, the dry dragging of soles on the waxed floor, the clinking of cups coming from a nearby coffee shop — all those sounds filled Iruka's ears, who, even in this setting, could hear the pounding of his own heart inside his chest as the moment of reuniting with his mother approached.
The screen displaying flight information flashed at intervals, alternating between city names, time zones, and delays, while voices in Japanese, English, and even other languages mingled in the air. Iruka, however, could only stare at the automatic door through which passengers appeared one by one, pushing carts with suitcases, adjusting wrinkled jackets, hugging family members, friends, and lovers who ran to meet them.
He felt his breath catch in his chest, his heart racing with each opening of the glass doors. The ambient noise became a distant hum — even the metallic announcements echoing in the lobby sounded muffled, as if the world were on pause, revolving only around that approaching moment. He knew that the circumstances that made Kohari book that trip were sudden, but Iruka would be lying if he said that his mother's visit would make him sad. He missed her so much that it hurt.
In the midst of all the rush, he seemed like a stationary point, just waiting, just longing.
And along with the waiting came the memory: the comforting smell of his mother, the warmth of that hug that always seemed bigger than him. A sweet mixture of expectation and nervousness made him swallow hard, as if he were about to find a part of himself that had become too distant. He had already bitten all his cuticles since Sunday, so now all that was left was for his hands to follow a restless but at least natural movement: it was how his body was dealing with all that anxiety that made him feel a slight tingling sensation. He was wondering how Kohari would react when she saw him when, finally, her familiar image filled his vision: the automatic doors had opened, revealing the woman who had given birth to and raised Iruka.
Umino Kohari was a woman with a strong presence: even at five feet tall, she stood out at any distance in any crowd. She had turned 56 months ago, but she still exuded a vitality that could make anyone genuinely jealous. Her slim, small body displayed a strength that did not allow people to think of her as even slightly fragile. Iruka bears an undeniable resemblance to her mother: her skin tone, the color of her eyes — brown — and the color of her hair. In her youth, Kohari had very long brown hair; now, older, she kept it in an elegant medium-length cut and had a few gray strands sprouting from her scalp. She did not dye her hair and was proud of her new shade mixed with her original hair color.
Her searching eyes quickly found Iruka in the crowd. The smile that appeared on both their faces was immediate, automatic. Everything around Iruka seemed to no longer matter; in fact, it seemed not to exist.
Kohari carried a backpack and a gray suitcase. She was wearing elegant clothes that combined comfort and style (that was just like her): beige cotton pants, a plain white blouse, and an overcoat the same color as her pants. On her feet, she wore flat sneakers, and a pair of sunglasses sat on top of her head, functioning as a headband for her short hair.
She walked quickly to Iruka, dropping the bag as soon as she reached him. They said nothing to each other: instead, they hugged each other tightly. Iruka wrapped his arms around his mother carefully, feeling her body against his own. Kohari's arms were well-defined and squeezed Iruka with a pleasant force that only his mother could provide. The omega knew that Japan was his home, but Kohari's embrace brought an immeasurable feeling of home in comparison.
The gesture that united them lasted a few good minutes. It would have lasted longer, but Kohari wanted to look at the face of her son, whom she hadn't seen in person for a few months.
They remained close, of course, and Kohari caressed Iruka's cheek, her thumb running over his cheekbone in a maternal gesture. The two were still smiling, even if now without showing their teeth, staring deeply at each other while also paying attention to the smallest details of each other, even though they knew each other very well. It was as if they were instinctively looking for what had changed, even though everything was exactly the same.
— Hi, my son. — Kohari's firm voice broke the silence with a whisper. She was emotional, but with happiness.
— Hi, Mom. I missed you so much... — She laughed softly.
— Me too, dear. It's so good to see you. — She squeezed his cheek, narrowing her eyes. — You are so beautiful! I never imagined you could be even more beautiful, Iru, you are glowing! Does this have something to do with pheromones?
— Mom! You and Dad are the same...
— Well, we had doubts because you didn't tell us anything! — Kohari then took a step back, crossing her arms in front of her body. — What would it have cost you to at least send a message? I would have freaked out anyway, but when Tsunade told me it had been months, I had to come! I knew something was going on, you were distant, so I had to come and check for myself. Like any concerned mother would do. — She didn't sound upset, she was just venting. Iruka smiled, even though his heart felt fragile in his chest. He really hadn't put himself in her shoes. He couldn't imagine what it had been like for Kohari, unfairly left in the dark all that time about his health.
— I'm sorry, Mom. It all happened so fast, so I... I was a little lost too.
— It's okay now, dear. Tsunade told me the medical and clinical details. You don't need to worry about that. What I want to know... — She picked up the wheeled suitcase again and linked her arm through Iruka's. — It's about Kakashi. Tell me everything while we walk to the car.
Iruka knew they would eventually get to this subject. And it had been in the most Kohari way possible: straight to the point. Objective.
A woman who always knew what she wanted; Iruka loved that about her.
He took the suitcase from her hand delicately, sliding it across the airport floor on its wheels to the parking lot, where Mochi was waiting for them. He put the backpack in the trunk along with the larger suitcase and got into the driver's seat while his mother was already ready in the passenger seat and, consequently, ready to hear everything she needed to know about Kakashi. In fact, Iruka knew it wasn't a question of what she “needed” to know. She wanted to know everything Iruka had to tell her.
— Well... — He began, with no alternative. And because that's what he wanted too. He was already starting the car and maneuvering it out of the parking space. — Kakashi is an alpha. He is the father of one of my high school students, Sakura. What happened first was that he came to school to invite me to dinner at their house, as a thank you for some advice I had given his daughter. I thought it was unusual, but I didn't want to seem rude, so I accepted. The dinner was great, everything went well, but things inside me had already started to change since that first day. Then, a few days later, there was a dinner at Kurenai's house, and Kakashi was there too. Because he's friends with her husband, Asuma. I think you met them, remember?
— Yes! They have an adorable little girl, don't they?
— Exactly, Mirai. — Iruka drove, his attention divided between the subject and the traffic. — At that dinner, we were alone and I felt weird. Hot, I don't know... I had to leave in a hurry. I was smelling something I had never smelled before whenever I was around Kakashi, and that smell made me feel weird. The next day, I consulted with Tsunade, and she explained what was happening. She told me I had to avoid Kakashi, but then I got into a car accident. Nothing serious, the other guy was at fault. And Kakashi was at the police station I went to, he's an inspector.
— Iru, this sounds like a soap opera. — His mother raised her eyebrows. — Inspector? Wow. That's impressive. I just hope he doesn't have a gun at home, that would be unpleasant.
— I don't think he does. — Iruka frowned. — It never crossed my mind, actually.
— It would be good to know. — Kohari shrugged. — But Tsunade told me she liked him. And my friend has a very keen sense for men, so I trust that he's a good man. By the way, he's older, isn't he? Being the father of a student and already an inspector.
— Yes, Mom, he's forty.
— Forty? — Kohari bit the inside of her cheek. — That's a fourteen-year age difference...
— Is there something wrong with that?
— No, dear, I just... I think you two will have to talk a lot. Align your goals, because you're at different stages in life. You're both adults, but he already has a teenage daughter. He has a prestigious position. A stable life. You're on your way to that. You're going to finish your doctorate and get a position as a civil servant, most likely as a university research professor, since you're competent.
— You're right…
— I'd like to meet him. As soon as possible.
— Mom, I haven't even finished the story.
— And...? You're still together, aren't you? I need to meet him.
— Yes, but I want you to know what happened... — Iruka shrugged, which made Kohari giggle. She remained silent, waiting for him to continue. — Okay. After we sorted things out at the police station, he took me out to eat. It was great, very pleasant. — He decided not to mention the part where they went to his apartment and Iruka almost went into heat again. She didn't need to know literally everything. — We kind of went out again, because... Because Kakashi had a condition that prevented him from sensing pheromones for ten years. But he could sense mine. Anyway, it was confusing. I hope Tsunade told you that too — Kohari nodded, confirming that she had — And we consulted with her together — Iruka preferred not to tell her about Obito yet. It seemed too personal to be told like that, inside the car. — He's also taking medication, monitoring his pheromones, having frequent blood tests... We're on our way to regulating our bodies with Tsunade's help.
— That's great, son. Really. But Tsunade explained to me... You're not going to take suppressants forever, right?
— Yes. It's just for control. I'm already reducing my doses, in fact. At some point, we'll experience heat and rut cycles like any other ordinary omega and alpha. — Kohari was paying attention.
— It's really good that you have a single partner. This business of sleeping with random people...
— Mom... I don't think we need to go into so much detail about where this conversation is going...
— You're right. — A pause. — And when will I get to meet Kakashi?
— Wow, you're so eager. I thought you came to see me. — Iruka feigned jealousy. — Aren't you tired from the trip? Jet lag? Don't you feel any of that?
— Of course I came to see you, dear, but I also really want to meet him. Because Tsunade... Well, she told me he seems like a great man. But not only that, she told me that he seems to really like you. That his eyes sparkle when he looks at you. I wanted to see that, to talk to him... And as for being tired, I slept the whole trip. I already adjusted my sleep to the time zone here during the flight, so don't worry. I'm super energetic. Make a dinner reservation with Kakashi and Sakura tonight! — She stared at the street in front of him. — If possible, of course.
An idea then popped into Iruka's mind.
It took them a few more minutes to reach his apartment. Kohari petted Chibi, who already knew and liked her. While his mother took a shower after they had breakfast together — Iruka had set the table before leaving to pick her up — he sent a message to Kakashi.
[Me] [7:36 a.m.]: Hi, Kakashi. My mom said she wants to meet you as soon as possible... Is the invitation for her to have dinner at your place still open? Because she would be super excited to go today.
And, as usual, Kakashi didn't take long to reply, even though he was off duty that Tuesday.
[Kakashi] [7:38 a.m.]: Of course, Iruka. I'll be waiting for you at 7 p.m. today.
[Me] [7:38 a.m.]: Thank you so much, Kakashi...
[Kakashi] [7:39 a.m.]: You're welcome, love. I want to meet her too.
[Kakashi] [7:40 a.m.]: I'll prepare the best dinner of your lives.
{...}
Kakashi had become unaccustomed to feeling anxiety related to expectations. He had spent the entire Tuesday revolving around that dinner: he had left early to buy the ingredients for the recipes he had in mind, had arranged everything for the preparations, and had dedicated the entire afternoon to making sure everything turned out perfectly. And, modesty aside, it had turned out exactly the way he wanted: even better, if he could be brutally honest. Before he knew Kohari was coming, Kakashi had been thinking of something simple, some of Sakura's favorite dishes, but he had reworked everything with Iruka following the suggestion that they invite Kohari.
He really wanted to impress the woman who could become his mother-in-law. He was really anxious about it, but even more so to meet her. To see her in person. More than liking his food, Kakashi wanted Kohari to like him. He wanted her to see how much he liked Iruka too, even though he knew he couldn't possibly control any of that.
At that exact moment, it was 6:45 p.m. Kakashi knew Iruka was on his way because the teacher had sent him a message letting him know. Sakura knew the teacher's mother was coming, but she wasn't anxious about anything at all. Not even about Sasuke coming too. In fact, Sakura was extremely excited that dinner was happening and that all those people would be there — as unusual as it was.
The alpha was now with his daughter in the living room, both waiting for the doorbell to ring. Pakkun was lying next to Sakura, who was intently tapping away on her cell phone. Kakashi stared at the watch on his wrist every minute, time seeming to drag on for him. He was dressed in a light gray linen shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his forearms, revealing his discreetly defined muscles without affectation. The navy blue tailored pants fell elegantly, emphasizing his upright posture, and he had decided to complete the outfit with a black leather belt. He wanted to look like a deliberately dressed-up version of himself, as he had thought through every detail earlier, but without losing his naturalness. Although he wanted to impress Kohari, he still wanted Iruka to find him charming as usual. He was even wearing the reading glasses he had worn only once in the omega's presence: perhaps he wanted to appear more intellectual to the woman.
Sakura, on the other hand, was wearing a burnt pink midi dress made of light, flowing fabric that fell freely over her body without showing anything at all. Her loose hair was still damp from her recent shower. She had painted her nails earlier, in a shade of black that stood out against her fair skin. Pakkun was stretching under Sakura's distracted caress when the doorbell rang, the sound echoing through the house and catching the attention of father and daughter.
— I'll get it! — Kakashi jumped off the couch, while Sakura and Pakkun stared at him in surprise. His daughter thought about saying that she already knew it was Sasuke at the gate: he had warned her by text message.
But Kakashi figured it out on his own.
— Hi, Sasuke. — The greeting came softly, but not out of disappointment. Kakashi's heart was racing in his chest, and he realized that Sasuke's presence was important to him. Obito's younger brother reintroduced into their lives was also a representation of how much everything was changing. For happier days. — How are you?
— Hi, Kakashi. Fine, and you? — Sasuke replied politely. Away from Mikoto and Fugaku, he was able to interact normally with Hatake. Since his parents were traveling, Itachi had given him a ride to the Hatake house without questioning or complaining. His parents would never let that happen. — Can I leave my shoes on that piece of furniture? — Kakashi nodded and made room for the boy to feel comfortable. Sakura was behind her father, smiling openly. He was dressed like a typical teenager: white Adidas shirt and black sweatpants. He prioritized comfort above all else.
— Hi, Sasuke! — The two hugged, Sasuke still looking a little out of place. Perhaps it was Kakashi's presence. — Dad, we will wait in my room, okay? When they arrive, let us know. — Sakura pulled Sasuke by the hand to the room, the two being lazily followed by Pakkun. Kakashi was about to close the garden gate and go back inside when a familiar green car took over the street and parked in front of his house. The smile that appeared on his face was inevitable.
Iruka was the first to get out of the Mochi. He had also opted for comfort that night: his hair was loose and straight, he wore an oversized light pink shirt, loose pants, and a pair of brown sneakers. He put the car key in his front pants pocket as he returned Kakashi's smile, waiting for his mother to get out of the passenger seat.
Kohari turned out to be a very tiny woman, especially next to Kakashi.
She was the most elegant of them all: she was wearing a light sweater, a thicker dark blue sweater, light blue cotton pants with white stripes, and a pair of brown Mary Jane flats on her small feet. Her hair was also loose, and shorter than her son's. Kakashi couldn't help but notice the striking resemblance between the two: the same golden aura seemed to emanate from Kohari, even though Kakashi hadn't exchanged a word with her yet. He swallowed hard, his heart aching with anxiety.
The moment was now.
— Hi, Kakashi... — Iruka greeted him, the smile still on his face, albeit smaller. — Mom, this is Kakashi. Kakashi, this is my mother, Umino Kohari. — Iruka must have been as anxious as Kakashi, because he had rushed the introductions before they even entered the alpha's house.
The two stared at each other. Kohari couldn't have been more than five feet tall, because a good eight inches separated them in height. The silver-haired man had extended a hand to the woman and was about to greet her verbally as well when he felt her surprisingly firm touch, which not only held his hand but also pulled him into a tight hug. He had to bend down to be embraced by her.
— It's a pleasure to finally meet you in person, Kakashi, even though my son didn't tell me anything about you until I called Tsunade! — He heard Iruka mutter under his breath — Of course, we've already settled that too, I'm just teasing now.
— Come on in, everyone... — Iruka pushed them both inside and closed the gate. Pakkun came running up and greeted the teacher first, then proceeded to sniff Kohari's feet, still clad in shoes, effusively.
— It's a pleasure to meet you too, Mrs. Kohari...
— No “Mrs.” dear. I don't look that old, do I?
— I agree, I'm sorry... — Kohari smiled, and Kakashi decided to take the lead and guide them inside. He felt like a teenager meeting the parents of his first girlfriend. Iruka and Kohari took off their shoes and placed them on the furniture near Sasuke's sneakers, then finally entered the house. — Make yourselves at home.
— Thank you very much. I'm sorry if my self-invitation was sudden, I just... I came automatically when Tsunade told me everything. Iruka wasn't telling me anything that was going on, so I needed to come and see him in person. To check everything. It's too much of a maternal feeling, even though Iruka is an adult...
— Mom, you're babbling. — Iruka caught her attention, and she nodded. Kakashi suppressed a laugh, because that was a trait he knew very well in the omega.
— It's okay, Kohari. I think Iruka didn't tell you everything because things happened so fast between us. — Kakashi put himself in the omega's shoes. — But as a father, I completely understand how you felt. I would have done the same thing with Sakura.
Kohari's face lit up.
— Ah, Sakura! Iruka had already told me about her when he started working at that school... I thought it was a beautiful coincidence that one of his favorite students was his daughter. It would make a great article in the newspaper... Is she home?
— Yes. Sasuke is here too. — It was Iruka's turn to raise his eyebrows. — Yes, ‘Ruka, Sasuke. Sakura invited him... They're in the bedroom now. I'll go get them.”
— That's great. He's my student too, Mom. And he's not Kakashi's son. — He clarified to the woman, who nodded.
— Your house is very beautiful, Kakashi. — She praised, looking around. She also petted Pakkun, who had liked the beta from the start, just as he had liked Iruka. Perhaps it had something to do with something in the Umino bloodline.
— Do you need help with anything for dinner, Kakashi? — Iruka asked, his hands in front of his body. Kakashi shook his head.
— Everything is ready. I'll call the kids... In the meantime, please sit down. — He pointed to the high table where he had had a romantic dinner with Iruka last week, set for five. Sakura had arranged it, which was why it was so elegant. Kakashi approached Iruka and gave him a peck on the cheek, taking advantage of the fact that his mother had returned to petting Pakkun. Iruka knew that they were both adults and that he shouldn't feel embarrassed by displays of affection like that, but at the same time, it was all so new to him that he inevitably blushed.
The two sat down, and Kohari murmured a few things about her first impression of Kakashi: handsome, kind, and well-off. “The holy trinity that mothers seek for their children,” in Kohari's own words.
Kakashi returned with the two teenagers in tow. Sakura and Sasuke introduced themselves to Kohari, who welcomed them with smiles. She knew Iruka's students only by name, so it was special for the woman to meet two of them in person. Some of Iruka's stories were no longer just names; now she could illustrate them mentally with the figures of the young people present. Kakashi, while they sat down, went to get the appetizer from the kitchen. As always, he had prepared all three meals on the menu.
That night's appetizers were cucumber sunomono with octopus, a refreshing Japanese salad, sour and crunchy, easy to eat and delicate; and grilled gyozas, the famous golden dumplings stuffed with pork and green onions, served with a slightly spicy soy sauce and sesame sauce. Kakashi had gone all out that night.
There were also several options for the main course: there was glazed teriyaki salmon, cut into grilled fillets with homemade teriyaki sauce, finished with sesame seeds; yakimeshi, a fluffy rice dish with carrots, peas, eggs, and diced chicken; and finally, vegetable tempura. Kakashi had breaded carrots, pumpkin, and shiso and served them with a tentsuyu sauce. He even decided to offer more than one option for dessert: he made mochi filled with matcha ice cream and sliced tangerines, strawberries, and pears. For dinner drinks, they alternated between hot green tea and soda. He thought about offering some sake, but since Iruka was driving, he dismissed the idea. Besides, Kohari didn't seem like the type of person who liked to drink much, especially on an occasion like this.
The conversations that filled the dinner were varied and flowed very well. Kohari was entertaining and managed to involve everyone in the conversations, as well as entertain them with her endless stories about her journalistic adventures. She seemed more and more like Iruka with every extra second Kakashi had to get to know her. They had the same sense of humor, the same voice inflections, and the same exaggerated hand gestures when they spoke with emotion. Kakashi's anxiety had almost completely disappeared, now replaced by a warm feeling inside his chest. A fondness that only family can nurture.
Kakashi had missed that.
Sasuke was even more relaxed, less withdrawn than usual. He talked normally with everyone, smiled, and even shared some stories. Kakashi's chest also filled with warmth at this realization, with the boy back in his home. There was indeed a lot of love and hope for Hatake — and it had all returned with Iruka. What he felt for the omega was becoming immeasurable, even though he was very young...
Kakashi couldn't help it. You could call him “emotional.”
The younger omega had loved that moment, those interactions. Not that his family wasn't loving, he had everything he needed at home. He had never lacked hot food or a bed, a place to study, a good school, but... Something had broken in the Uchiha family dynamic after Obito died. Something had shattered inside Mikoto herself, much more than her own heart. She would never recover from the death of her son, not because she didn't try, but because it was a maternal feeling. Any other mother would always have that grief; if it was already difficult for people like Kakashi, Sakura, and Sasuke himself, no one could say how it was for Mikoto. Of course, she loved both Itachi and Sasuke with all her heart, just as she continued to love her husband, Fugaku, but something had broken. In her, mainly, and in all of them.
They were never the same again.
Of course, they shared the dinner table. They continued to do so even now that Itachi was in college — he was only in Tokyo now because college was on break. But there was no lively exchange of conversation, they just ate in silence. They talked about trivialities, grades in school and college, the routine, but... But there was an absence of warmth. Everyone felt the weight of Obito's absence. Of course, a decade had passed since all that misfortune, but they never stopped to talk about it properly. They had settled into silence on the topic and, gradually, into silence on all topics. When Sasuke discovered he was a recessive omega, he felt like he was adding to the pile of problems his family already had. He felt terrible. He wished he had been born different, even though he couldn't change that.
His only hope was that he would never encounter the specific trigger for his pheromones — as had happened with Iruka, even though the boy didn't know about the teacher's true nature. Perhaps he would feel more welcome if he knew, but Iruka didn't feel he should tell him.
The time for that would come.
After everyone had eaten dessert and helped clear the table and dishes, Sasuke and Sakura excused themselves to talk about the various topics they had to catch up on in the bedroom, while the adults went to the living room. Kohari sat in an armchair, while Iruka took a seat next to Kakashi on the sofa. The warm presence of the omega beside him made the alpha feel more comfortable as he had Kohari's meticulous gaze on his own figure.
— Iruka told me you're a police officer, right? — Kohari began. She really sounded and looked like a woman who knew how to conduct an interrogation.
— Yes, ma'am. I mean, Kohari. For over twenty years. I'm an inspector.
— Congratulations. That's very good... — Kohari then narrowed her eyes. — Iruka is going to kill me for this, but you don't have a gun at home, do you?
— Mom!
— I don't. — Kakashi laughed nervously, looking at Iruka with a reassuring gaze. — It's okay, it's an important question.
— You promised you wouldn't talk about it... — Iruka said through clenched teeth.
Kohari shrugged.
— I'm a concerned mother. And... Iru told me that you had a partner and after he passed away you stopped sensing pheromones, right? I'm sorry for your loss, by the way. — She sounded empathetic, with a cautious look. Kakashi appreciated her concern.
— Yes, thank you. — He knew that neither she nor Iruka knew the details about Obito's death. He would still have to tell them to the omega eventually, even though he didn't feel entirely ready yet. — It's a post-traumatic condition. Tsunade... Tsunade knew what it was right from my first consultation with her.
— She told me all the technical details, I just wanted to share my feelings. I found it very... Interesting? — The tone of doubt came from her choice of words. — The fact that you two met. Iruka triggered your dormant pheromones and you triggered his.”
Iruka listened, albeit silently. He wanted the two of them to talk.
— Yeah. — Kakashi shrugged and adjusted his glasses on his face. Iruka found the gesture sexy, even though he was in front of his mother. — But it turns out... Well, I hope Iruka told you the rest, but I'm not interested in him just because of the pheromones. We've had other encounters, some planned and some unplanned, and your son is an incredible person, Kohari. I'm really taking this, the two of us, very seriously. If that's one of your concerns, as a father, I can understand...
— Yes. — She agreed. — So you're really interested in him?
— Yes. I really like Iruka. — A pause, as the two maintained unbreakable eye contact. — Genuinely.
A small smile appeared on Kohari's beautiful face. Iruka wanted to disappear: it seemed like Kakashi was facing the matriarch of a mega-conservative family, but it was “just” Umino Kohari. His relentless mother.
— Great. — Her smile widened. — Iruka likes you very much too, so I have no choice but to like you. Not that I expected not to like you, but I didn't raise my expectations too high because I was suspicious, since I heard the details from Tsunade. But I can understand, it's all very new. After that incredible dinner, you completely won me over through my stomach, Kakashi — she joked. — And you seem like a wonderful father. So, I'm happy with all of this.
— I'm very happy. And relieved. — Kakashi leaned back on the sofa, one hand on his chest to demonstrate the feeling.
— I think I scared you a little... — Iruka finally said something, smiling slightly.
— Maybe, but I've dealt with worse things. — The alpha reassured him. Kohari then cleared her throat.
— I just wanted to ask you a few questions now. I talked to Iru, of course, but I wanted to talk to you too, Kakashi. Especially because I can see your relationship strengthening... — She gestured. — But Iru already told me that the idea is for you to stop taking the suppressants, right?
— Yes. Next week, we'll stop taking them...
— And then, within a month, he'll start having normal heat cycles like any other omega. And his rut as an alpha, in six months...
— Mom, where are you going with this? — Iruka frowned.
— Honey, I know you're adults, but since you've lived your whole life thinking you were a beta, and a beta man is not capable of conceiving, I want to talk about the topic of “children”. Kakashi, you have Sakura, so you probably won't want children for a while, but I've seen that your life is very stable. You would probably be a great father to Iru's children, but he is still finishing his doctorate and needs to pass a civil service exam, so I ask that you pay attention to protection and cycles, the dates on the calendars for the next four years... At least...
Iruka had buried his face in his hands.
— Umino Kohari, I can't believe you're embarrassing me like this. — It wasn't a reprimand.
— It's not to embarrass you! It's just to clarify and warn you, as a mother...
Kakashi laughed nervously.
— It's okay, Iruka and Kohari. I'm not offended, I... I know the stage of life Iruka is going through. We've already talked a little about future prospects, and I wouldn't have plans to have a child with him or anything like that anytime soon, we're still getting to know each other. Even though we've already made a lot of progress in that regard. — He received a discreet elbow from Iruka. — But you can rest assured. Nothing will happen until Ruka is stable too. Trust your son, and you can trust me too."
The woman nodded.
— Thank you, Kakashi.
— I echo his words, mother. You know I'm responsible. — It was Iruka's turn to narrow his eyes at her.
The woman simply raised her hands in a sign of surrender, as if she had done nothing wrong.
The next hour was filled with quiet, lively conversation. Kakashi heard some stories about Iruka's childhood and enjoyed the way Kohari talked about her son with such love and pride. She explained about his father's absence on the trip, and Kakashi said he was also looking forward to meeting the man someday. They stayed like this until Kohari, for the first time that day, showed signs of tiredness, and Iruka took the cue to return to his apartment.
The woman said she would wait for her son in the car when they arrived at the gate, leaving the couple a moment alone.
— Thank you so much for today, Kakashi — the omega thanked him as he felt himself being wrapped in an embrace around his waist. — You were amazing. Thank you especially for your patience...
— It was nothing, 'Ruka. She's the one who's amazing. — They exchanged a peck on the lips. — Let's go out more often while she's here.
— Perfect. — Iruka smiled. — You look amazing in glasses, you know? Kind of sexy...
— You like them, then? I'll wear them more often.
— Promise.
The two laughed and exchanged another kiss before saying goodbye for good, Iruka getting into Mochi and starting the car to drive home. Kakashi waved to them and only went inside after the vehicle disappeared from view, locking the gate behind him. He wished Sakura and Sasuke good night as he passed her room — the boy wouldn't be sleeping there, but Itachi would still be a few minutes late — and retired to his own quarters. He was feeling light after dinner, the conversations, and somewhat electrified by that last interaction with the teacher.
So, to end that day, which had been a real roller coaster of emotions, why not a little provocation?
He lay down on the bed and picked up his cell phone, opening the conversation with Iruka.
{...}
[Kakashi] [10:59 p.m.]: [Photo attached]
[Kakashi] [11:01 p.m.]: Good luck trying to sleep now, 'Ruka.
{...}
Meanwhile, in Sakura's room, she and Sasuke managed to catch up on everything that had happened over the last ten years. How? Don't ask me that. But somehow, now it seemed like they hadn't spent any time apart. Obviously things had changed, but they were best friends again. Some axis of planet Earth had returned to its proper place on that Tuesday night, which should have been uneventful, but had involved a series of unusual events.
— And is Naruto really the same? — Sasuke asked. Sakura was lying on the bed next to him, both staring at the ceiling. The omegas' black and pink hair was mixed together under the surface of the pillows.
— Yes. The same. You already know what he's like... He'd love to talk to you again too.
— I know. — Sasuke shrugged. — He's been trying to get closer, but I kind of pushed him away...
— It's okay. He won't give up. He's always had a crush on you too — Sakura blurted out — so now that you've given him an opening, he's not going to give up. No way. This is motivating him like I've never seen before.
Sasuke sat up, now staring at Sakura.
— A crush on me? Like... He likes...?
— Oh, Sasuke — Sakura sat down. Now that she had brought it up, she knew there was no way to avoid it. — You're not stupid. Everyone knows that. Well, everyone except Hinata. I tried to warn her, but she got worse after Naruto gave her a chance... If we can even call it a chance...
— Aren't they together?
— They're kinda dating, but Naruto doesn't want anything serious. Look, honestly, he's crazy about you, Sasuke. He always has been. He never hid it, did he?” Sasuke shook his head. — Exactly. But you've always given everyone the cold shoulder, even me, who is obviously loved and adored by the whole school! — The comment made Sasuke laugh because he knew Sakura was performing — So he settled for it, he got used to it. But give up? Never. I just told him that the way to get close to you would be, first of all, to break up with Hinata.
— That's true...
— But I think Naruto is hopeless. I think you would need to show him some interest so he understands and then break up with her... If you want something with him more than friendship, but he’s Naruto, right? You don’t like him back, do you?
— But that wouldn't be nice. I have nothing against Hinata... — Sasuke replied, ignoring some parts of what Sakura said.
— So you're going to show interest? Wait, you like him back? Where did I get lost in this conversation?
— Sakura, I... — Sasuke shrugged, unable to hide it from her. — I think he's cute, so what? If we're really going to get closer, maybe I'd like it to be more than just friends.
— This is new to me! I always thought your type was, I don't know... Someone like Gaara? More serious?
— But Gaara is so short. Besides, he's unbearable.
— He also has a crush on Naruto, you know?
Sasuke would keep that to himself to feel retroactive jealousy.
— I don't have a crush on Naruto. I just think he's cute — the boy repeated slowly.
— It's the same thing, Mr. Uchiha — The omega rolled his eyes. — You... What do you think your parents will think when they find out that you've not only reconnected with Naruto, but with me too?
Sasuke sighed.
— I've already wasted too much time in our friendship worrying about what my parents think, Sakura. I need to live my own life too, even if they disapprove. — The two exchanged confident smiles, full of love for each other.
Sasuke had even shared his true nature with her, the truth about his second gender. Sakura would not judge him for anything, even if he committed a crime. Sasuke had missed this kind of friendship in his life, and having it back made him truly want to live happily. He couldn't isolate himself just because his family was making that move...
He wanted to write his own story with his own hands.
So he was determined to give Naruto a chance to get closer to him. Finally. And see where that chance would take them, whatever fate had in store for the two of them...
Notes:
I know I said that wouldn't be an update because of my girlfriend's birthday, but something unexpected happened! We had a wonderful celebration yesterday, but today her best friend has just broke up :( So they went to meet up and I had time to write, hehe.
What did you think of the chapter?
Thank you for all the feedback, comments, and kudos! You guys are awesome <3
I'm already anxious to release the next chapter (it's not ready yet, but what's going to happen in it makes me smile from ear to ear, hehe).
Finally, we'll have more Narusasu in the next chapters, hehehe!
Hugs <3<3<3
Chapter 21: Circles and cycles
Summary:
Situations repeat themselves.
Notes:
enjoy the chapter <3333
thank you all for the kudos, comments and bookmarks <3 love u all!!!!!!!!!!!!
song: Matilda - Harry Styles
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
You can let it go
You can throw a party full of everyone you know
You can start a family who will always show you love
You don't have to be sorry for doing it on your own
A month had passed, and Iruka still hadn't forgotten the photo Kakashi had sent him. That's right, a month of that damn photo haunting him, like a ghost that inhabits a house. Kakashi had no right to send him a photo of himself leaning back against the pillows on the bed. He was wearing the dress shirt from dinner a month ago, but it was unbuttoned almost to the middle of his chest, revealing the fair skin and broad chest that Iruka had scratched so much over the weekend, the subtle marks of the omega's nails still slightly evident on the surface of his body. His face was present in the photo, a natural expression on his face, with no obvious emotion, but there was one essential detail: he had kept his glasses on. His hair was tousled in that way that only the policeman could keep it so that it still looked good.
That photo had been Iruka's downfall during the entire month his mother had remained in Japan.
With Kohari around, he couldn't sleep at Kakashi's house, nor could he do the opposite for obvious reasons. They met countless times, some even without the woman present, but they couldn't progress to more intimate encounters.
Iruka was a bundle of pheromones and hormones — especially now with increasingly smaller doses of suppressants and each day bringing him closer to his eventual heat.
Putting that aside, the month had been wonderful. It was always great for Iruka to have his family around, especially now that they came two or three times a year at most, due to the exorbitant prices of tickets from Brazil to Japan, and from Japan to Brazil. They were able to talk, visit various places, catch up on things... Iruka would have liked his parents to return to Japan, but he knew they were absurdly happy in Brazil. Just as he couldn't imagine living in another country, he understood that the opposite was true for his parents.
Kohari had not only met Kakashi and Sakura, but also Sakumo. Iruka himself had met Sakumo along with his mother, and was immediately struck by the physical and personality similarities he and Kakashi shared. Sakumo was a quiet man, always talking just the right amount. But in front of Umino Kohari, he loosened up a little more. Like Iruka, the woman had the ability to bring out the more outgoing side of people. This fact only confirmed to Kakashi that there really must be something different about the Umino bloodline—it was the only possible explanation. On top of all that, Kohari had exchanged numbers with Kakashi, Sakura, and even Sakumo, saying, “In case Iruka leaves me without news again, I'll bother you guys.” These were her own words, taken in context.
Iruka now had a gang of Hatakes for his mother to gather information about him. Great.
Although they hadn't had much intimate physical contact during that month, which was making Iruka want to climb the walls, he had grown closer to Kakashi's family. Sakura had been extremely open about their relationship once they stopped hiding it from her. She loved having Iruka around. She had adored Kohari since the first dinner they shared, but that probably came from a previous burden about her being Iruka's mother: his favorite teacher and now officially Kakashi's boyfriend.
That's right: officially.
The omega was now in the school science lab (the only place that provided the true peace he needed to finish writing a report that would still be reviewed by both Kabuto and Orochimaru), typing eagerly on the computer in a hunched position that certainly did his spine no good. In the middle of his own notes, which were the result of the mess of voices in his own head, Iruka had to stop to stare at the silver ring around his right ring finger — because the left finger is the wedding finger.
He and Kakashi hadn't gotten to that part yet.
The correct question to ask at this point is: how exactly did the proposal happen? Why wasn't it mentioned before?
The truth is that everything unfolded in a way that perfectly matched the dynamics of their relationship: without planning and somewhat suddenly.
Iruka had been thinking for a while about how Kakashi showed his feelings through acts of service and gifts: he always cooked, he had fixed Mochi that time, he sent messages asking what Iruka and Kohari might need, he had given the omega a beautiful choker... The teacher was beginning to feel that this relationship only benefited him, like a one-sided relationship — even though Kakashi was definitely not bothered by it, Iruka began to feel in his heart that he wanted to show his feelings with something more than words. Even though words were extremely important to him.
So, one afternoon at the mall, accompanied by Kohari, Iruka bought a pair of very thin silver wedding rings, but at the same time delicate and elegant. His heart leapt in his chest just imagining the policeman's reaction. Maybe he would think it was silly, maybe he wouldn't see the point in wearing wedding rings or in a request to date, but Iruka wanted to do something for him. He wanted to show him how he felt through a gesture, just as Kakashi had been doing so naturally and clearly in recent months. Besides, they were already acting like boyfriends, so there was nothing wrong with making it official, right?
However, as much as Iruka wanted to do something special, his real name should be Anxious Umino Iruka.
On the same day he made the purchase, he stared at his phone, more specifically the calling app, and Kakashi's name glowed on the screen. He was at home, sitting on the couch, with Chibi purring beside him, snuggled up against his owner's hip. Kohari was in the bedroom, changing clothes because she intended to go to the neighborhood gym and then take a walk through the streets. It was late afternoon, so it would be quiet, and she would take a good two or three hours to return.
As soon as she left, an idea popped into Iruka's mind, lighting up like a lamp. He called Kakashi.
— ‘Ruka? — The alpha answered on the second ring.
— Hi, Kakashi. Are you free right now? — Iruka had never been so direct in his entire life.
— Yeah... Yes? Why? — Kakashi didn't sound aggressive, just genuinely curious. Iruka knew he was being impulsive, but at the same time, he had never wanted something to happen as much as he did now.
— Can you meet me here at my house? I have something important to tell you. Really important. — Maybe he shouldn't be so desperate for Kakashi to come, but Iruka really wanted him to. He really wanted to do what he had thought of in less than five seconds.
Still, part of him felt that it would be special — even if it was in his own crazy way.
— I'm on my way — Kakashi replied, and that brought a big smile to Iruka's face. — I'll be there in twenty minutes.
— Perfect! I'll be waiting for you! — Iruka hung up before Kakashi could say goodbye, which left the alpha staring at his phone with a look of doubt on his face. Iruka, meanwhile, got up from the couch and changed his clothes. Chibi was the most displeased with that gesture, considering he was so comfortable feeling Iruka's warmth. He put on white cotton pants and a tight-fitting navy blue shirt, leaving his hair down. He put the choker around his neck, finishing the look. He knew it would be simple, but he felt it had to be now.
Exactly twenty minutes later, the doorbell rang. Just by the ring, Iruka already knew it was Kakashi.
The omega opened the door, facing Kakashi's tall figure: he was wearing brown tailored pants, a black turtleneck, and a beige coat. The pants were adorned with a belt the same color as the sweater, and his silver hair was neatly tousled—Iruka now knew that he did this to look cooler despite his age, even though he wasn't old at all. The omega couldn't help but notice that the alpha was carrying a plastic bag in one hand. Kakashi immediately noticed his gaze.
— I brought gyozas. — He held up the bag, a smile spreading across his sculpted face that made Iruka automatically smile back. — Hi.
— Hi. — The omega greeted him back and took a step closer to kiss him quickly on the mouth. — Thanks for coming. And... for the gyozas too. You didn't have to. — He made room for Kakashi to enter, finally closing the door.
— But I know you guys like them. — Kakashi shrugged, as if it were no big deal. Iruka took the bag so the alpha could take off his coat and hang it behind the front door. — Where's Kohari?
— She left. — Iruka placed the small bag on the kitchen counter, with Kakashi following him. The alpha raised an eyebrow, suspicious of something he couldn't quite put his finger on yet.
— And what was it you had to tell me that was so important...?
— Well, that... — Iruka smiled awkwardly and stared at the tiny velvet box on the counter, next to where he had placed the Styrofoam box of gyozas after putting away the plastic bag. — It's right here.
Kakashi raised his eyebrows, his gaze fixed on the black box.
— What is it?
— Open it. — It could have sounded like an order, but Iruka always managed to sound gentle. Kakashi approached and picked up the box, which looked even smaller in contrast to the alpha's long, slender fingers. He examined it cautiously before opening it, revealing the delicate pair of wedding rings.
— Iruka...?
— Sakura texted me your ring size. Thank her for that. — Iruka was smiling and trying to sound more confident, but the truth was that his voice was a little shaky and his heart was pounding in his chest. He walked around the counter to stand in front of Kakashi, who was still holding the box. — Maybe you think this is a little silly or childish, but I... I wanted to make us official. I know we've been dating for a while, we've slept together, we've had several dates, but you deserve someone who does things the “right” way. You're always so affectionate with me... — He bit the inside of his cheek. — I want to take care of you too, Kakashi. And I want people to know that you have someone for that, a boyfriend... Through these rings. — He paused to take a deep breath. — But obviously this is much more about us than what other people think, in fact they are the least importante par—
Kakashi interrupted the omega's chatter with a kiss.
Iruka's eyes widened at first, but it didn't take long for him to melt into the alpha's gesture, then relax against his body. Still holding the box with one hand, Kakashi hugged him around the waist, pressing Iruka completely against him. The gesture was reciprocated, of course, with the omega wrapping his arms around the alpha's broad shoulders.
— Can I take that as a “yes, I want to be your boyfriend”? — Iruka asked against his mouth, his breathless laughter masking a giggle. Kakashi smiled against his mouth, carefully placing the box back on the counter to properly embrace Iruka with both arms as well.
— Yes, Iruka-sensei... — He bit the omega's lower lip lightly. — You have no idea how happy you can make me. — When their eyes met again, even with their faces inches apart, Iruka could see that Kakashi's irises were shining. He felt his heart race even faster in his chest. — Thank you, love.
Iruka's smile was inevitable.
— I won't repeat myself... I just want you to feel as cared for as I feel, Kakashi. — The alpha was nodding. He glanced at the kitchen clock and then reached into Iruka's shirt with one hand, caressing the side of his waist with the tip of his thumb. The omega shivered at that touch alone, which made Kakashi's ego swell.
— Where exactly did your mother go?
— The gym...
— And how long will she be there?
— About two hours... — Iruka then understood exactly where Kakashi was going with those questions. — Kakashi, do you think...?
— I'm absolutely sure, actually. — Their eyes sparkled. But first, they took the rings from inside the box and slipped them onto each other's right ring fingers. Kakashi lingered for a moment, analyzing how perfectly the piece fit, how the silver seemed to shine even under his pale skin and shone even more against Iruka's skin. Kakashi hadn't felt his chest overwhelmed by that warm feeling about a relationship in years. He did feel cared for by Iruka, not because of that ring or that special proposal itself, but he had felt that way before. That moment, even though Kakashi would never demand it from Iruka, made him feel more special too. Truly loved by Iruka... And he was almost forgetting how good it felt to be overwhelmed by this pleasant flood of sensations.
That, as lovely as it was, came with an absurd desire he harbored for Iruka. In recent weeks, even with Kohari's arrival, that burning feeling had only grown. Kakashi knew he should relate it to the total absence of suppressants, but it shouldn't even be natural. He sometimes desired the omega so much that he felt like he could explode — even when they were far apart or when he was in inappropriate places. At times, he only needed to imagine Iruka to feel like he was on fire.
So, on the night Iruka decided to officially ask Kakashi to be his boyfriend, the alpha wanted to seize the opportunity that had arisen for them both.
After the rings were properly placed, they kissed again. Kakashi wasted no time in sliding his hands under Iruka's shirt; that piece of clothing, which fit his body perfectly, was making Kakashi discover the most fertile side of his own imagination. The teacher's torso contracted under the touch of his elongated fingers, while the omega's hands ventured across the policeman's broad back, also under the fabric, feeling the soft skin that sheltered those powerful muscles. Iruka missed this—his mother's visit had made their moments of intimacy more difficult...
Little did they know that this would continue for the rest of the month.
The reason? When they finally made it to the bedroom, Kakashi sat on the bed to pull Iruka onto his lap. However, neither of them had seen the little ball of fur lying on the bed — Chibi had left the sofa and run into the bedroom after Kakashi arrived — and let out the most skittish growl Kakashi had ever heard in his entire life. He stood up at once, both of them staring at the cat in an attack position and looking at the alpha with all the hatred that her small body could muster.
A minute later, Kohari called Iruka to let him know that she would be back early because she had forgotten to bring the right shoes to go to the gym. Unfortunately, the two had to say goodbye, but that didn't diminish their happiness one bit.
It only increased the desire that would build up for the rest of the month. nd the gyozas, unfortunately, remained untouched on the kitchen counter.
{...}
That month had not been atypical only for Iruka and Kakashi.
Sasuke had decided to give Naruto a chance, as he had told Sakura the day he had dinner with the Hatake family because his parents were traveling.
At school, the omega started with subtle signs: he greeted Naruto with a nod, smiled discreetly, sometimes asked if they could pair up for any activity that required them to get together in groups... Naruto, slow as always, took a while to notice the green signals the younger boy was sending him.
It took him exactly two weeks to realize it, almost half the month. But once Naruto realized what was happening right under his nose, the alpha seized that opportunity with both hands, as if it were the only chance Sasuke would give him, as if, even worse, his life depended on it.
It seems exaggerated, but that's exactly how it happened. And it kept happening.
Naruto had broken up with Hinata. He decided once and for all to make it clear to the girl that he didn't want anything serious with her at that moment, and, as Sakura had imagined, none of it ended well. Hinata really believed that Naruto liked her as much as she liked him, and the request to end it all came very suddenly. Naruto broke her heart and, consequently, broke up his group of friends. Some took Hinata's side, while others didn't see much of a problem with the boy's attitude, so they still talked to him. However, Shino and Kiba didn't even glance in Naruto's direction. And since no one was stupid, it wasn't hard to connect that breakup with his sudden closeness to Sasuke.
But Naruto didn't care: his passion for Sasuke was greater than any other feeling he could possibly feel. Not that he was obsessed, but he had really spent the last ten years thinking about Sasuke and ways to get closer to him. So when the omega himself decided to reconnect, it was a fish that Naruto couldn't help but catch, honestly.
Sakura knew that this reconciliation was important for both of them, Sasuke and Naruto. That's why she couldn't be upset with either of them, not with Naruto for ending things with Hinata that way, nor with Sasuke, who knew that Naruto was with someone else, even if it wasn't official. She couldn't see or blame either of them, it would be unfair and she wasn't that kind of moralist — she didn't even consider herself one, in fact. The girl was happier to see her childhood trio talking again than worried about the other social implications that this entailed. Now that Sasuke was talking to Naruto, the three of them would sit together at times and catch up on the last ten years or reminisce about their childhood.
They remembered when they were friends, how close their families were, how Obito was a ray of light for everyone around him. Even though grief and longing coexisted in conversations like these, leaving a bitter taste in Sakura's mouth, she felt really good remembering all of that. She felt genuinely happy and connected to her own essence. That was what had been missing in her life for the past ten years, a hole that only Sasuke was able to fill. And there he was, allowing himself to be happy as he had once been in the past. Despite his family, despite everything that fate had in store for them. There should always be happiness and hope in the end.
Sasuke was regaining bonds that he felt he shouldn't have lost ten years ago. Even Kakashi was returning to his constant company. He felt light, lighter than ever, in those last few weeks. Waking up without a weight on his heart was the best feeling in the world, and Naruto and Sakura were the light that guided Sasuke through his dark days until he finally opened up to the people who were just waiting for him.
He only regretted not having done it sooner, but he also believed that there was a right time for things. Not literally the right time, but the time when everything should properly happen. He was finally ready to receive all that love again when he decided to become more open, taking a different stance from the last ten years. Effectively breaking with a pattern that his family had imposed on him — imposed because Sasuke had never been asked what he really wanted. As if his wishes would always automatically coincide with those of Fugaku and Mikoto, as if he were a mere extension of his parents and not a complete individual — even if he didn't know himself completely — with his own feelings and personality traits.
Besides Itachi, he hadn't had anyone who genuinely thought about what he wanted. Before, he had both Obito and Itachi, but Obito had been torn from the lives of all those people, not just Sasuke, and Itachi was a child like him at the time. He also had to submit to what his parents wanted, even if he disagreed, and was able to explore new areas of life after he left home for college. Even with the distance, he and Sasuke remained as close as possible. Itachi always tried to advise his brother to secretly reconnect with his childhood friends, but Sasuke had many barriers. Now that he had finally managed to lower his walls and was talking to Sakura and Naruto again, he had already updated Itachi on the latest news, and his older brother couldn't be happier. Since he was on vacation and they were talking in person, he had the opportunity to see Sasuke clearly happier, brighter, shining, as if his friends reflected in him a version of Sasuke that everyone thought had been lost in childhood.
Fugaku and Mikoto didn't suspect anything. They were just happy to see a little more motivation and excitement in their youngest son, who had always been so withdrawn around them — and in their view, obviously. Sasuke had never really felt seen or recognized by them, and that wouldn't change now that he was feeling happier, even if it only involved a good feeling and not the usual depression that plagued him. Sasuke even treated this condition with a highly qualified therapist, never needing medication, because his case wasn't that bad. Although it was sometimes suffocating, Sasuke was relieved by this characterization of “not so serious, not so deep.” It meant he could take it, even if it hurt.
And now, it wasn't hurting. After years, he was floating among people.
The conversations with Naruto varied greatly: they caught up on the last ten years, shared all kinds of moments, talked about common interests, and... flirted. That's right, a light flirtation, often fun, but enough to awaken the famous butterflies in Sasuke's stomach. He felt his face flush — even though it was absolutely pathetic — and he kept smiling like a fool at Naruto, who smiled back dumbly, and Sasuke always thought it was the cutest thing in the world, even though he would never admit it to himself, much less to other people, and even less to Naruto himself.
That particular afternoon, Naruto and Sasuke were in the school library, more specifically in the group study room, one of the areas that the library had and offered to students after school. The blond had insisted that they do a history project together — and Sasuke, even though he didn't have to, had agreed. They were sitting side by side at one of the wooden tables, books piled in front of them, but their concentration didn't last long.
— You're not even reading that properly, dobe — Sasuke commented, raising an eyebrow when he realized that Naruto was staring more at his profile than at the pages of the book. He didn't even look away from the book, he just wanted to show Naruto that he could feel his burning gaze on him. The nickname, which meant “last” and, in some cases, carried the meaning of “loser” was affectionately given to the alpha by Sasuke.
Naruto scratched the back of his neck, laughing awkwardly.
— I am! It's just that... you're in front of me and you're distracting me...
— Oh, of course — Sasuke turned a page, not hiding his ironic smile. — So it's my fault you can't study. And I'm not even in front of you. — He still hadn't given Naruto a single glance, who was almost begging for the slightest bit of attention with his pleading blue eyes.
— Exactly — Naruto replied with conviction, resting his chin on his hand. — Because you're much more interesting than any ancient war...
Sasuke felt his face flush immediately and focused all his attention on the book, as if the words on the pages could erase the feeling of heat rising to his ears. And he still refused to look at Naruto, especially now, when he could give him the satisfaction of seeing Sasuke blush because of him.
— Idiot.
Naruto leaned a little closer, lowering his voice:
— But it's true...
For a moment, Sasuke's heart skipped a beat so hard that he almost closed the book for good. But instead, he took a deep breath, trying to hide it. And, as a counterattack, he replied, after finally turning his face toward him, staring at him as Naruto had wanted from the beginning:
— If you keep talking like that, I'm going to think you don't really want to study... And then I'll have to do everything myself.
Naruto, with that silly smile on his face, replied without hesitation:
— Maybe so... but just by staying by your side, it’s enough for me. Not the top marks, although you could do a realt good paper by yourself.
Sasuke snorted, feigning impatience, but he couldn't stop the small smile that escaped him when he lowered his head to resume reading. Naruto noticed, of course, and became even more convinced. As they were sitting next to each other, the blond took advantage of the proximity to gently touch Sasuke's knee, which made both their hearts race, not just the omega's, with that physical closeness. The chemistry between the two was palpable, and what they both wanted was obvious, even though they had never talked about it, but moments like that were really capable of throwing them off balance, even if subtle. However, usually, whenever Naruto made Sasuke blush, the heat in his face would pass...
...But not this time. His face continued to burn. And the heat, instead of disappearing, was spreading through his lap, chest, stomach, legs, arms... To his whole body, taking him over entirely.
Then, the smells around him grew stronger — especially Naruto's and his pheromones. It was as if each of his laughs, each of his gestures, was accompanied by an invisible chain that pulled Sasuke in the opposite direction of logic. His heart raced uncomfortably, and the blond's pheromones, that aroma of citrus notes of bitter orange and Sicilian lemon mixed with a fresh touch of ginger, formed a radiant and lively scent. Just like Naruto. And Sasuke's body wanted to move towards him, in his direction, so that he could smell that aroma in every possible and impossible way. A knot was forming painfully in the pit of his stomach.
— Are you okay, Sasuke? — Naruto asked softly, noticing his paleness, sounding concerned. He was sensing the beginning of a floral scent being emitted from Sasuke...
But then the omega just got up hurriedly, without answering, and practically ran to the bathroom in the main hallway, outside the library. He locked himself in a stall with a nervous click of the lock, sitting hunched over the toilet after lowering the lid. His face was too red, his eyes slightly watery. His body trembled with an unknown energy, and the knot in his stomach now throbbed painfully, crying out for something, or rather someone, to undo it immediately. And that someone should preferably be Naruto, the great trigger for all of this.
Naruto followed him with immediate urgency. He stood in front of the stall where the floral scent of Sasuke's pheromones was coming from, which Naruto shouldn't be able to smell, because everyone knew Sasuke was a beta. Not an omega, not an alpha.
— Hello? Sasuke? — He knocked on the door, distressed. — Are you okay? Talk to me! Please... — Naruto was using all his strength to ignore the possible effects that the floral scent was beginning to have on his body, stirring his nature as an alpha, even though he was a teenager. At least it was more subtle than it would be with an adult alpha. Naruto was still more concerned with whatever Sasuke might be feeling, such as pain, than with any physical effects he himself was suffering at that moment.
The silence on the other side only increased the tension. But then, with an almost instinctive sense of smell, Naruto sensed it. The air felt different, heavy. His heart raced. He was no genius, but he knew when pheromones began to react. And that could only mean one thing — something similar had happened last year at the Hatake house, when Naruto was the one who recognized the vanilla pheromones coming from Sakura's body, being emitted at a more subtle rate into the environment. Naruto was sure that Sasuke wasn't a beta, and if he thought he was or was hiding something, it was too late for those old claims now.
— Damn... — he muttered, running his hand through his blond hair, trying to think fast. He knew what was happening, but couldn’t say it out loud, even if just to himself.
Not knowing how to deal with it alone, Naruto let go of the door and sprinted through the school hallways, climbing the stairs to the teachers' lounge. He didn't find who he wanted there, so he went to the second place where the teacher, actually the only teacher he wanted to find, could be at that moment. Naruto knew that Iruka was at school in the afternoon because the omega had mentioned that he would spend the afternoon there, doing some college work, so he automatically thought of him when thinking of someone to help with Sasuke's situation.
He finally found Iruka in the lab, leaning over the computer, typing as if he were angry. But Naruto ignored all the other details about the teacher, his head filled with only one good reason: Sasuke.
— Iruka-sensei! — Naruto gasped, bursting in, his voice laden with despair.
Iruka was startled by the noisy entrance and was about to scold Naruto, but he realized the urgency in the way Naruto stared at him with wide blue eyes and gasping for breath, which revealed that he had run to find him.
— What is it, Naruto? — His voice was soft, and he had already closed the computer in front of him, his attention completely focused on the student.
Naruto took a deep breath before spilling the information.
— It's Sasuke! He... he locked the bathroom door and I think... I think his pheromones reacted with me. I can feel it in the air, you know? He got weird out of nowhere, sensei, I... I don't know what I did, I didn't even know Sasuke had pheromones, and he... He won't answer me! Is he okay? Can you go check on him? Talk to him? Please, sensei, I don't know what I did...
Iruka's eyes widened as he put the pieces together in a second. The same thing that had happened to him months ago was happening to Sasuke, because he knew Sasuke’s true nature.
— Where is he, Naruto?
— In the bathroom closest to the library. — Naruto sounded more relieved now that he knew he would have Iruka's help.
— Thank you. Let's go. Actually, can you call Kurenai-sensei for me? She's in the teachers' room. — Naruto nodded and, extremely frightened, left the lab to call for the teacher. Meanwhile, Iruka headed to the bathroom indicated by Naruto, stopping in front of the only closed stall from which low sobbing could be heard. The teacher's heart tightened because he knew how much it hurt. He knew better than anyone how painful it was, especially when you were alone and when it happened suddenly, when you least expected it.
He knocked softly on the door with the back of one hand. He couldn't sense Sasuke's pheromones like Naruto could, but he knew that the room was most likely flooded with them. Any omega or alpha who wasn't recessive would be soaked in that scent.
On the other side of the door, Sasuke had curled up above the toilet, hugging his knees. His body was hot, his heart racing in a way that made no sense. He was breathing deeply, crying despite his attempts to hold it back, each sigh coming out shaky, laden with frustration.
— Sasuke? — The teacher's voice sounded calm, firm, but gentle. — It's Iruka. Can I talk to you?
A heavy silence followed. Sasuke closed his eyes, trying to maintain his composure. His voice faltered when he replied:
— G-go away... — He was clearly crying. That made Iruka's heart tighten inside his chest.
— I'm not going anywhere. You're going through something now and strange, I know. Let me help you...
— I... I don't want him to know. — Sasuke's voice came out in a broken whisper. He was talking about Naruto. — I don't want anyone to know. I don't want my family to know, Iruka-sensei, I already told you about all this... I-I didn't want to go through this too, I didn't want to be a defect... Especially my parents, they can’t know...
Iruka understood immediately, even though his heart broke at those words. He understood it all better than anyone else, even if Sasuke didn't know it. He took a deep breath before answering:
— It's okay. — But Naruto already knew. He had felt. — It's safe with me, Sasuke. I want to help you, I know... I know someone, a professional who can really help you. Not someone who will try to fix you.
The sound of rapid breathing continued, and Sasuke clutched the sleeves of his uniform as if it would tear apart under the fabric.
— My body... — he murmured hesitantly, his eyes watering. — There's something wrong with me. I feel... I feel different... Maybe tt was Naruto... But it's my body that's wrong, not him...
Iruka closed his eyes for a moment. He recognized every sign. That despair, the confusion, the feeling of not being in control. And he also recognized what it meant.
— Sasuke... there's nothing wrong with you — he said firmly, but affectionately as always. — What you're feeling is natural. It's part of who you are.
Silence. Only the sound of the boy's trembling breath.
— But... I don't want to — Sasuke pressed his forehead against his knees. — I don't want to be like this. I don't want him to notice. Please don't tell my parents. — He was begging.
Iruka felt a genuine urge to walk through the door and hug Sasuke, to take him into a cocoon of immeasurable care and protection.
— Listen, you're not less strong or less worthy because of this. Being a recessive omega is not a weakness. It's just... different. And you don't need to be ashamed. — His voice came out so confident that, for a moment, Sasuke believed him. — You're not alone. What you're feeling may be confusing right now, but you don't have to carry it in the dark. I'm here. I'll always be here. — Iruka paused. — Do you trust me, Sasuke? We've talked about this before, and I know a doctor. I know she's good because she helped me too. She's actually helping me with the same situation you're going through, dear. Let me reach out to you.
On the other side of the door, a muffled sob escaped Sasuke. For the first time, instead of pushing away, he realized that there might be someone in the world who would accept him for who he really was — someone who would help him without expecting anything in return, who wouldn't judge him. The same someone who was behind that bathroom stall door, the same teacher who had been the only patient person in the past to listen to him when no one else had truly done so. Sasuke realized that he was not facing the end of the world, but rather the beginning of a new way of dealing with his world.
Notes:
I ALMOST didn't manage to update today. I lived this week like Iruka, with private lessons, an internship, an academic presentation, and I still had to send a report to my advisor to REVIEW and then I had to correct everything based on what he pointed out... I SURVIVED this week!
I had planned more things for this chapter, but I wasn't able to develop everything the way I wanted, so I split it up. That's why Kakashi barely appeared; he'll be more present in this “second part.” STAY TUNED. I won't take a week to post, it'll be faster!!!!!!!
What did you think??? I hope you didn't find it repetitive, that was exactly the intention, hehehehe, but I welcome constructive criticism!!!!!!!
This week I also went back to writing a little more of that love triangle fanfic, and I admit that the idea of a possessive and obsessive Kakashi has been on my mind a lot... and in this other fic, it WILL happen. It turned out great (with all due respect, since I'm committed!)
Anyway, bright kisses and see you in the next chapter!!!!! Tell me what you think of the fic in the comments (if you want to, of course)!!!!
Chapter 22: Heat
Summary:
Iruka goes into heat (again)
Notes:
showing up early, hehe
enjoy your reading! <3
song: First Time - Hozier
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Some part of me must have died
The first time that you called me baby
And some part of me came alive
The first time that you called me baby
— You know, this is breaking my heart, Kakashi.
— What exactly, Tenzo?
— That you're wearing a relationship ring and I still don't know who your boyfriend is, Inspector.
Kakashi let out a sound that resembled laughter, but couldn't quite be described as such. The two were once again in his office at the police station that afternoon, like any other day on duty. Once again, Kakashi found himself facing a pile of papers, only today he was actually doing his job of reading the countless reports written over the past week for his review. With each report he read, he stamped a specific area with his signature and forwarded the report to the specific police department that would try to solve the case in question. It was one of the most boring jobs at the police station, but Kakashi honestly liked it. It was safe, it meant that the alpha had to stay behind a desk, without getting involved in danger and violence as he had had to do in the past. In addition, he had Yamato as his assistant, although lately, the other alpha had been much more focused on questioning him about his relationship.
— Can we not talk about my personal life during business hours?
— But, senpai, we're friends, aren't we?
— I would say yes, but at the moment we are boss and subordinate.
— I can't understand why you can't tell me if you've already confirmed that I know the person...
— It's fun to see you questioning yourself. Do you really think I would deprive myself of the only fun in here?
— That's cruel.
— Cruel? — Kakashi looked up from the paper to finally face the alpha sitting across from him at the office desk.
— Yes! You're enjoying the suffering of a friend...
— Yamato, you're a police officer, so you're a natural investigator. Use your head.
— Wouldn't it be easier for you to tell me?
— Definitely easier. But I repeat: what's the fun in that?
— I give up. — Yamato sighed. — Did you make the request? Or did he? How did it happen?
It was Kakashi's turn to sigh. He stamped the report and placed it on the pile that would be forwarded to the criminal affairs department. He then stared at his open right hand in front of him, his eyes more specifically focused on the wedding ring that had been a lovely gift from Iruka. A small smile appeared on his lips as the ring glistened under the artificial light of the office, inevitably remembering the night Iruka asked him to come to his apartment out of the blue. Kakashi would never have guessed the omega's real intention, which made that moment even more special to him. His heart warmed just thinking about the teacher. The police officer wondered what he was doing now: in the college lab with his supervisor or at school, perhaps surrounded by students or grading a pile of tests with several different colored pens.
The click of the cell phone camera woke him from his reverie.
He stared at Yamato with a frown: the other alpha was putting his cell phone in his pocket.
— What was that?
— I have proof of how much you're in love, senpai.
— Delete that photo or I'll send you on a field mission, Tenzo.
— That's cowardly. The photo turned out great. I've never seen you like this before.
— It's weird to think that you now have a photo of me on your cell phone. My boyfriend won't like it one bit...
— Is he jealous?
— Not really. I don't think so. — Kakashi leaned over the table. — And the official request came from him, okay? Does that answer your questions?
— For now. We're still going out, aren't we? I want to meet him.
— When we finish this paperwork, maybe.
— I repeat: you're cruel. I'm going to get some coffee, do you want any?
— No sugar.
— The usual, then. — Yamato got up, leaving Kakashi's office with determined steps that would take him to the cafeteria across from the police station.
Kakashi was working another shift that afternoon. Basically, his job involved staying in the office dealing with paperwork or possible situations with people who came to file police reports, like that day when Iruka was involved in a traffic accident and, by chance, Kakashi heard his voice since the office door was ajar. He was wearing the typical police uniform: a dark blue long-sleeved shirt with buttons closed at the front, which clearly outlined his chest and front muscles, as if that were one of the functions of the clothing. His identification badge glinted gold on his chest; his pants were also blue, and his shoes were completely black, practical, and reasonably attractive. His hair was messier than usual: the result of hours of reading, which made Kakashi frequently run his hands through his hair whenever he read something very absurd. Or when he got tired of sitting — but he definitely had nothing to complain about. Especially every time he felt the cold ring against his finger and automatically remembered Iruka.
He was dying to see the omega, in addition to the desire that seemed to grow every day, added to the time since they had had an intimate moment plus the total weaning of the suppressants. Tsunade had estimated the dates on which Iruka's heat would arrive — and that would happen in a few days, actually. The two already had their respective leaves of absence from work during that date and a few more weeks — because of the duration of the heat — and would stay at the teacher's apartment during that period. Sakura would stay with Sakumo, and the two agreed to take care of Pakkun and, consequently, Chibi as well. Everything was settled, and Kakashi's anxiety seemed to increase exponentially with each passing day as the appointed date drew nearer. He had written it down on the calendar in the police station office, on the calendar in his home office, and even in his cell phone's digital calendar.
He was staring at his phone at that moment when Iruka's name lit up on the screen, as if he knew Kakashi was thinking about him. It took the alpha a moment to realize he was receiving a call from him, and he answered a few seconds later:
— Iruka? Is everything okay? — He didn't usually call in the afternoon, especially when he knew Kakashi was on duty.
— Hi, Kakashi, everything's fine with me... How about you? — He sounded nervous, or anxious, Kakashi couldn't quite tell over the phone. But he could tell that something unusual had happened. He could tell just by the tone of his voice, however, that Iruka was most likely biting his thumbnails. He did that when he was anxious.
— Well... Did something happen? Do you need anything?
— Yes, something happened, but it's with Sasuke. We're at the clinic where Tsunade works, I had to bring him... He's fine now, but I need to fill out his paperwork because he's a minor, and they won't accept me as his legal guardian because we're not related by blood or family. His parents are traveling, and Itachi isn't answering my calls or Kurenai's or the school's... I'm sorry to ask you this, but could you come here? Since you were... You were married to his brother, I think the hospital would accept your signature...
Kakashi had never refused Iruka a favor. It wouldn't be this time, especially since it involved Sasuke. Kakashi had always taken care of him as a child and loved him as if he were his nephew — even though Obito and Sasuke were brothers, the age difference made it easier to think of him as a nephew.
— I'm on my way, Iruka, no problem.
— Thank you, Kakashi. I'll be at the reception desk, okay? Thank you so much.
— See you in a couple of minutes. — He hung up hurriedly, leaving the room as it was. He asked them to let Yamato know that he had left and would adjust his schedule later; it wasn't as if he had to strictly follow his shifts, especially when something unexpected happened in the family. Because that's what he, Sasuke, and Iruka were becoming: all part of the same family.
{...}
Iruka convinced Sasuke to open the door after his crying subsided. The boy opened it carefully, letting the teacher into the cramped cabin. Iruka hugged him and kissed the top of his head, whispering words that would make him feel a little better. Iruka understood in every detail what he was feeling: the confusion, the heat, the pain, the desire to disappear... It was something inexplicable. Kurenai appeared moments later, informing him that contact with the family was not working. She had already informed Hiruzen of the situation, and the director had given his physical permission for Iruka to take the student to the hospital.
Iruka knew exactly who to take Sasuke to.
He called Tsunade while driving — not recommended, but he was desperate — while Sasuke was curled up in the passenger seat. They couldn't take Naruto with them because, besides being a student, he was an alpha. And the alpha who had awakened all that in Sasuke. Despite the blond boy's concern, Iruka assured him that Sasuke would be fine. And the teacher's word was enough for Naruto.
The doctor was waiting for them in front of the hospital when Iruka parked. Sasuke was taken to a room with her, and Iruka accompanied him until he was taken to a room. After taking medication — suppressants — the reactions stopped and Sasuke was able to sleep, with traces of tears marking his pale cheeks. Tsunade instructed the omega to fill out the boy's form at the reception desk, but he ran into problems because he was not related to him in any way.
The idea of calling Kakashi came to him while he was trying to argue with the receptionist.
Fifteen minutes later, the alpha appeared, wearing his police uniform. Even in that situation, Iruka inevitably found him very attractive — he had seen him in that outfit a few times, and always had absurd fantasies involving Kakashi wearing that same uniform. The alpha had no problem filling out Sasuke's form, even though he was currently Obito's widower, he had already had the surname “Uchiha” in his name years ago. Therefore, the hospital accepted his signature without any problems as the boy's legal guardian.
The two sat down in the reception area, now that everything was finally settled. They just had to wait for more news about Sasuke.
— What happened? — Kakashi asked after they sat down, taking one of Iruka's hands and stroking her back with his thumb. Even though it didn't seem like it, he was very good at expressing affection through physical touch. Iruka liked that. — Is it something serious...?
— No, it's just... Sasuke is like me. He's a recessive omega. He told me at the science fair, you know, after he saw us in the music room. — Iruka shrugged. — His family knows, but they don't deal with it very well. He feels like a mistake, a mutation, something that shouldn't exist. I tried to explain to him that there was nothing wrong with that, but I couldn't talk about myself. I felt it wasn't the right time. Besides, he also talked about other things... Anyway. I was working on some research reports at school when Naruto found me and explained what happened. Sasuke started going into heat while they were studying, and I think it was Naruto's pheromones that triggered it, because he's recessive. It wouldn't happen out of nowhere.
— That makes sense.
— That's why I brought him here. His parents are traveling, and Itachi still isn't answering or returning his calls. I don't think there's anyone better than Tsunade to help him. And he doesn't want... He begged me, actually, not to tell his parents. He doesn't want them to know at all, Kakashi. — This put Iruka in an extremely delicate situation as a teacher. And, consequently, with Kakashi's introduction into the story, everything became even more complicated. But Kakashi knew that Iruka had no alternative given the circumstances. He felt relieved that he could help.
Even though he knew that if the Uchiha found out the whole truth, they wouldn't like it one bit. Not at all.
And they would eventually find out, even if Sasuke didn't want them to. They were his family, and some secrets cannot remain secrets forever.
— You did the right thing, Iruka. And of course I don't think it's bad... You apologized before, but it's okay. I would do anything for you, knowing it's for Sasuke...
— Thank you so much. I feel like I only call you to ask for favors...
— And to ask to be your boyfriend too. Don't forget that.
— Impossible. — The two stared at each other in silence, then Iruka bowed and kissed him quickly on the mouth in an affectionate peck. — Do you need to get back to the station?
— No. I'll adjust my schedule later. Advantages of being an inspector, you know.
Iruka laughed and was about to reply when Itachi appeared at the reception desk, eyes wide and exuding concern. The teacher immediately stood up, letting go of Kakashi's hand and walking over to Sasuke's brother.
— Iruka-sensei! — Itachi exclaimed, relieved to see someone he knew. — Where's Sasuke? How is he? I...
— Everything's fine now, Itachi. I brought him to consult with someone who understands what he's going through.
— And what is he going through? I was at an internship interview for the holidays and ended up turning off my phone, I'm so sorry about that... — Iruka could almost feel the guilt overflowing in the boy's tone of voice. He shook his head to reassure him, placing his hands on his shoulders.
— It's okay, it's nothing serious. You know Sasuke is a recessive omega, right? — Itachi knew. — He had a reaction... A reaction to a classmate's pheromones. This can happen to recessive omegas, but it's okay. He's being examined by the best doctor in the country. Your health insurance covers all procedures. — Iruka bit the inside of his own cheek. — He's sleeping now, but Tsunade will give us details soon. And Sasuke asked that his parents not be told about what happened today. — Itachi nodded, now definitely calmer.
— And his form...? Did you sign it?
— Kakashi came. He signed it. — Itachi then noticed the man's presence, still sitting in the reception area, staring at them with his dark eyes. He felt comforted by the presence of not just one, but two adults. Even though his mother didn't like Kakashi, he was doing Sasuke a big favor and, consequently, Itachi as well.
— Thank you very much. — The two exchanged affectionate smiles, and Iruka guided Itachi to sit next to Kakashi.
— I'll go get some water, okay? I'll be right back. — The teacher walked away from the two, leaving Itachi and Kakashi in silence, now side by side. Kakashi watched the teacher until he disappeared from view, as the water filter was in another hallway. Iruka was wearing typical work clothes: a yellow sweatshirt, dark jeans, and white sneakers. His hair was tied back in a high ponytail. The only accessory he wore that day was the ring on his right ring finger. It was simple, but absolutely beautiful.
— That night at the fair... — Itachi broke the silence. — My mother was very cruel to you, Kakashi-san. I'm sorry. — He didn't look at Kakashi, but stared straight ahead. Kakashi noticed this out of the corner of his eye, but then looked at Itachi's profile. He looked like Sasuke and, consequently, like Mikoto. All the children bore an uncanny resemblance to their mother, even Obito. Sasuke, however, was the most similar. He was a carbon copy of her. — But I know that sometimes even she doesn't believe all the guilt she tries to place on you.
— Itachi, it's okay. You don't have to get involved in all this...
— How can I not, Kakashi? — Itachi turned his face toward him, his eyes serious as always, despite his young age. The two made eye contact. — Everything changed after Obito. And it wasn't your fault. You... Anyone could tell that you would have done anything to prevent that tragedy. Obito didn't deserve that, Sakura didn't deserve that, you, you didn't deserve that. My mother never understood that your family, their family, was destroyed overnight. She could only see that she had lost her own son. But Obito was her husband, Sakura's father, my brother and Sasuke's brother. She closed herself off in her own world and took everyone else with her.
— Itachi, I don't blame your mother...
— I know you must blame yourself more than anyone else, Kakashi, but that's not how it works. It's not fair for you to punish yourself for this. Obito was so happy with you, he loved you so much... My parents were against it from the beginning. And they were ashamed of it after they saw how healthy your marriage was, how well you raised Sakura together... And after everything happened, and they closed themselves off in a world of illusions in which you were once again to blame for everything... They feel ashamed. And guilty, of course they do. My father feels it, but he hardly ever talks about it. I know he misses Sakura too, he loved it when she called him grandpa... — Itachi took a deep breath — They owe you an apology, Kakashi. For everything they made you feel after Obito was gone. It wasn't a burden you should have had to bear alone.
Kakashi didn't know exactly how to react to everything that was being poured out on him. He didn't know what to feel, he didn't know what to say. The feeling of welcome that Itachi was giving him was indescribable in any human language, existing, non-existent, or obsolete.
The two were still staring at each other, and Itachi's gaze revealed that he had already said what he wanted to say. Everything that had been inside his chest since that night when Mikoto's words triggered what Kakashi knew to be a crisis; the same night he confused the voices of Itachi and Obito. Now he could identify the differences, even though the tone was similar, the way the two paused to speak, but... But it didn't hurt like it used to. Part of Kakashi was grateful for the similarities, because that way he would never forget the timbre of the voice of the person with whom he had once shared his life. Even though now there was someone else who made his whole world light up — in a different way, but still special.
— Thank you, Itachi-san. — That was all he could say. Itachi smiled slightly, and that was enough. Iruka appeared a moment later, as if he knew the exact time the two needed to talk. He carried two small plastic bottles of water and handed them to the two with an affectionate smile, taking a seat next to Kakashi. The alpha sat between the two of them, feeling that lightness in his chest, in his heart, which was once again becoming a routine part of his life.
Tsunade appeared shortly after at the reception desk calling for the companions of patient Uchiha Sasuke. All three were allowed to enter her office, which was not where the boy was. Sasuke's condition was not like Iruka's: it turned out that Naruto's pheromones were not the only ones he would react to. They had only served as a trigger, and now he could be considered a “normal omega.” She prescribed monthly suppressants, since he was a teenager and did not have a steady partner. She recommended to Itachi that this be shared with the family, even at Sasuke's request. The boy just nodded, but it would be up to him to decide what to do with that news. In addition, Tsunade said they could always count on her, and gave him a card with her number on it.
Sasuke woke up late at night, when he was finally able to return home with his brother. Iruka and Kakashi waited until that moment to assure the boy that everything was fine with him, and, even though he was still a little dazed from the IV medication, Sasuke managed to thank them both for all their support. He assured Iruka that he would give Naruto the news, considering how worried the blond had been about him at school.
Iruka and Kakashi said goodbye at the hospital entrance. They would meet again in three days, as it was the long-awaited date of the probable start of Iruka's heat, according to Tsunade.
{...}
Three days later, Iruka no longer had any cuticles left to bite.
Kakashi had arrived at his house the day before — the date marked on both their calendars — but nothing had happened since then. Their leave granted them a period of fifteen days apart, in case of margin of error. Still, he felt like he was going to explode with anxiety. They were finally alone to do what they wanted, but his body seemed to have forgotten the process. So they had been living as a couple in quarantine since the day before, which wasn't bad either, but Iruka couldn't forget the goal, the reality, even though Kakashi was trying to reassure him. The truth was that the alpha was as anxious as he was.
Considering that they hadn't touched each other in over a month, they couldn't wait for the heat to begin. The night before, it was obvious that they didn't just sleep. But nothing involving Iruka's heat had awakened, even with the sequence of acts they performed to relieve, even a little, the growing desire they had been feeling for each other for a long time. A day later, they were in his apartment living room, watching a movie on television.
Actually, Iruka was watching. Because Kakashi had snuggled comfortably behind him and was sleeping like a log even in the face of the action and violence unfolding on the screen. It was impressive how comfortable Kakashi already felt around Iruka, falling into a deep sleep from one moment to the next.
The omega was once again incredulous at the workings of his own body when the heat began, first inside his stomach and then spreading like a wave throughout his entire body. It was always when Iruka least expected it, so this time was no different.
But Kakashi was asleep.
— ‘Kashi... — Iruka called softly for him, while he still had a shred of consciousness left. Kakashi, in response, muttered softly and squeezed him around the waist. Iruka wanted to feel the strength of those arms all over his body, not just there, but he couldn't complain that the pressure was bad. He bit his lower lip, already feeling the strands of hair sticking to his skin with the droplets of sweat that were beginning to sprout all over his skin. — Kakashi, wake up... — He brought his hands to his face, shaking him gently and carefully. He felt a twinge in his lower abdomen; Tsunade had warned him of the pain and intensity, and that it would be good if they didn't delay in starting. For Iruka's own sanity. He suppressed a moan that formed in his throat. It was impressive that Kakashi was a light sleeper most of the time, except now. — Kakashi... — He tried to raise his voice, that knot in his lower abdomen tightening.
His body emanated a frightening amount of pheromones, filling every nook and cranny of the apartment. Iruka felt hot, sticky, and above all, thirsty for the man sleeping in front of him. He slid his hands to his shoulders, digging his nails into his muscles over his shirt. The rough gesture made Kakashi frown and slowly wake up, his nostrils already being invaded by the almost sickening smell of espresso emanating from Iruka — almost, because Kakashi was the one who loved that aroma the most in the whole world. Alerted by his own senses, of course, the alpha didn't take long to open his eyes, waking up properly.
— Iruka... — He arched his eyebrows, staring at the state the teacher was in at that moment. His face was flushed, his mouth half open, and his skin glistened with sweat beading on its surface. He was clinging to Kakashi, his body curled up, looking even smaller against the policeman's. He was slowly being overwhelmed by Iruka's excessive pheromones. — Let's go to the bedroom. — Kakashi was still trying to be rational, and carried him with him to the bedroom. The omega continued to cling to him like a puppy, but instead of staying still, he kissed and nibbled lightly on Kakashi's neck, making the alpha shiver. Kakashi began to feel the effects of his heat on his own body, throbbing between his legs, needing to be inside Iruka in the next moment.
He laid the omega on the bed, fitting himself between his open legs. Iruka was wearing a loose shirt and shorts, and Kakashi only had to slide his hand into his shorts to realize that there was absolutely nothing else underneath that piece of clothing. And Iruka was absurdly wet at that point, dripping between Kakashi's fingers when they reached the area between his buttocks. Kakashi suppressed a curse in the back of his throat and kissed him brutally, feeling his mouth vibrate with the little moans that the omega, completely out of his mind, let escape. Iruka scratched his back, lifting his hips and moving them just under the slightest touch of the alpha's fingers against the sensitive area, which alone revealed how much he needed Kakashi at that moment.
Kakashi's body was no longer in such a distinct situation.
Their kiss was broken when they needed to breathe a little, a trickle of saliva connecting their mouths in a curved line. Kakashi lingered on the details of Iruka's face: red, hot, eyes half-open with effort, the perfect curve of the scar on the bridge of his nose complementing the whole look that gave him that beauty that Kakashi thought should not belong to this world at all. Kakashi ran his hands all over his body, kissing his cheeks, neck, collarbones, chest, stomach. He got rid of his shirt as he climbed up, exploring some specific areas of his body with his tongue. While Iruka squirmed beneath him, moaning softly and messing up and pulling his hair, Kakashi took the opportunity to slide two fingers inside him. And they literally slid in, considering how wet Iruka already was at that point in the night.
The omega arched his back, even though Kakashi's fingers, as long as they were, were not enough to satisfy what he was feeling, to satisfy the knot inside him that made his stomach pull with strong twinges. Only Kakashi himself could undo that pain, which, with the alpha's help, would become something pleasurable and bearable.
The two were too intoxicated to think about any kind of preparation that would take too long. Kakashi thrust his fingers against Iruka, feeling his heat and making the omega contract even though he only wanted Kakashi to take him once and for all. Unable to disobey him for long, Kakashi removed his fingers from inside him and stood up. He got rid of their remaining clothes with enviable skill, and in the next second he was wedged between Iruka's legs, grabbing the bed sheets on either side of his head so hard that his knuckles turned white. He also slid inside Iruka, and the delicious invasion almost automatically relieved the twinges and pressure that the knot brought to the omega's lower abdomen. He relaxed for a second beneath Kakashi, but then wrapped his legs around his hips, causing Kakashi to bury himself completely inside him and trapping him properly as well. His fingertips ran all over Kakashi's body, as if he wanted to feel every inch of the alpha's body that filled him. Iruka gasped softly, his face contorted with pleasure as he pressed Kakashi against him as if he intended to merge their bodies — which wasn't a bad idea, considering how thirsty they were for each other.
Kakashi kissed every inch of Iruka's face as the two got used to the fit, until he finally began to move inside him, his hips working in rhythm as he gripped the sheets so tightly that he almost tore the fabric beneath his fingers. Iruka squeezed his hips with his thighs, his feet clenched as he felt the delicious thrusts hitting his sensitive spot, hitting exactly where it was needed for that agonizing pain to become properly pleasurable, with Kakashi filling exactly where the heat wanted him to be. As if the two were made for each other.
Iruka moaned against Kakashi's ear, further intoxicating the alpha with the sounds he made, crying out for him as if his life depended on it. Kakashi could almost believe it at that moment, his own consciousness having long since abandoned him considering the situation they were currently in.
— ‘Kashi, I... — Iruka tried to warn him after a particularly strong thrust that made him see stars before his eyes, his eyelashes trembling as he rolled his eyes, his eyelids also trembling slightly. He bit his lower lip, and Kakashi brought his mouth close to his ear, making Iruka feel his lips moving against his cartilage.
— Come, baby. — Iruka felt like he had gone to Heaven and back with just those words. He came the next instant, dirtying both their torsos and pressing Kakashi's member at the base as he contracted. That gesture made Kakashi cum inside him almost at the same time, with Iruka burying his face against his neck while holding him tightly, his arms and legs wrapped around him. Even though they had reached orgasm at that moment, and Iruka had experienced the sensation closest to an extremely pleasurable “near-death” he was still in heat, which meant his member was still hard. His lower abdomen felt twinges again, the knot was there once more.
He had no choice but to beg Kakashi, almost crying for him.
And Kakashi had no choice but to satisfy the desire within his omega.
He had dealt with omega heat before, so even though he hadn't done so in the last ten years, it wasn't uncharted territory for the police officer. However, for the teacher, it was completely new. He was not at all prepared for that overwhelming feeling of need that had taken over him and his body involuntarily and completely, the way he was feeling vulnerable and consumed by a lust that was nowhere near the desire that had been consuming him before. That was being taken and consumed by sensations that went far beyond control, but Iruka wasn't feeling bad or insecure about any of it, on the contrary. That was because Kakashi was there to make him feel good, safe, and desired, and he was successfully achieving all those goals.
After they came together, Kakashi didn't immediately withdraw from inside Iruka, because he knew it would end up hurting both of them if he did. And he didn't want to withdraw either. He reversed their positions, leaving the omega on top and lying down with his back on the bed. He stroked his hair with his hands, feeling his pheromones intertwined with his own, the scents dancing together around the room as if one belonged to the other and vice versa. He could feel Iruka's hard member between their bodies, and waited until the teacher lifted his face, his pupils still dilated due to the exorbitant desire that inhabited his body at that moment. And that would continue to inhabit it next week.
Iruka said nothing and kissed him right away. He pressed his mouth against his desperately, spreading his hands across his broad chest and settling himself on his lap, already moving his hips thirstily to feel more of Kakashi, so that the alpha would once again relieve the knot that tied his stomach and made him want to climb the walls due to the desire that accompanied that feeling of physical pain. It hurt from horniness, it was even funny to think about it, honestly. Not that Iruka was rationalizing anything at that moment, in fact, quite the opposite. Kakashi knew that, and wanted to let Iruka follow his instincts.
He didn't stop him from sitting properly with Kakashi still inside him. Iruka's legs were bent to the side as he moved his hips against Kakashi's erect and hard member inside him. As with the first time, Kakashi could see his own length inside Iruka, mainly in his lower abdomen, filling every possible and impossible millimeter of the omega. This time, the younger man managed to get the same view and touched his own belly — a movement stemming from his intrusive thoughts — and reveled in the sensation. Filled by Kakashi in every way, by everything Kakashi could give him. He wanted to carry Kakashi inside him in every way he was allowed to, he wanted to be filled with the alpha beneath him.
Kakashi grabbed his thighs, his ass, his slim waist, leaving reddish and purplish marks on his dark skin with the strength he could muster, not enough to hurt him, but to mark him as his, to mark him while he listened to his moans begging for him. Iruka wiggled and bounced on top of him after getting used to it, feeling his body catch fire at that insane rhythm that only the two of them understood inside the apartment. He felt Kakashi's member hit him deeply, in just the right sensitive spot, which made him feel like he was about to die, but still alive and deliciously alive. He saw not only stars, but entire constellations before his eyes and under his eyelids as he rolled his eyes in pleasure. Between lapses of consciousness, he remembered crying when he reached the peak — and it wouldn't happen just once, or even two or three times, but four, five, six, seven, eight... And so on, because they had a whole week ahead of them to devote to satisfying that desire that seemed infinite within him and consequently extended to Kakashi.
They didn't stay in the bedroom. The bed wasn't the only piece of furniture they used during Iruka's heat: the bathroom, the living room, even the kitchen became places to satisfy the desire that had been building up inside Iruka for years — it was as if he was making up for the lack of heat in that first one, according to Tsunade herself. Kakashi, fortunately, had enough stamina to keep up with him; any other alpha would probably have passed out around the third day. Of course, between rounds of sex, they slept, drank water, and snacked on something — salmon onigiri and banana milk — because their bodies still had to function, beyond basic needs, but that week was definitely filled mostly with hours and hours and hours of sex. Primitive and wild sex.
Kakashi never thought Iruka was half as daring as he turned out to be. This was not disappointing in any way; it had taken the man to another level in terms of how much he desired him. He thought that desire couldn't increase, but Iruka always showed him that he shouldn't believe in words like “impossible”.
Kakashi, even more aware than Iruka, had not been able to keep track of the passing days. He had woken up at some point on the couch, with Iruka beneath him, sleeping peacefully. The policeman took advantage of that moment of rest to go to the bathroom, brush his teeth, and take a quick shower. His own reflection revealed how much Iruka had marked him: he had welts on his back, chest, and torso, hickeys and bite marks on his neck and collarbones... None of this frightened him, it just brought back fresh memories, albeit jumbled ones. Since Iruka was still asleep when he returned to the living room, he took the opportunity to go to the kitchen. He was finishing his first decent meal in days when Iruka appeared, wearing only a loose shirt that belonged to Kakashi.
From the amount of pheromones he carried — which Kakashi sensed just from the heavy scent — the alpha knew he wasn't there to eat. He was there to be eaten, in fact, and that was exactly what the alpha would do.
But Iruka didn't let him move: he pinned him against the kitchen counter and kissed him. With that same hunger as the other days, but there was something more, something more provocative and primal shining in his eyes when Kakashi made eye contact. That had piqued the alpha's curiosity to absurd levels, so even though it was suffocating to restrain himself due to the pheromones and his own instincts that wanted to move him, Kakashi clung to the counter, remaining motionless so that Iruka could do what he wanted. He kissed Kakashi's already marked neck and went down his chest, then kissing his nipples and squeezing the muscles in the area. The gestures made Kakashi shiver all over, and for a moment he wondered if Iruka was really in heat or just wanting to play with him. It could be both, but he was enjoying it. He wanted more than the omega was willing to offer him.
Kakashi really wasn't expecting it when Iruka took one of his nipples into his mouth, sucking it while playing with the other, squeezing his broad chest and enjoying the muscles that had been built up over many years of training. Kakashi groaned, clenching the cold marble against his fingers and curling his toes against the floor beneath him, staying upright with great effort. Iruka continued to play until he awakened maximum sensitivity in the alpha's region, giving him a provocative glance before descending to kneel before his hips. Iruka pulled down his pants in one go, and since Kakashi was wearing only that piece of clothing, his member sprang out at once, almost slapping Iruka's cheek — which would have been an incredible scene in itself, in Kakashi's imagination.
Iruka gasped, his mouth already salivating at the corners as he carefully took it by the base before finally taking his glans into his mouth, closing his lips around the thickness. He knew he couldn't take it all in his mouth — no human could — but he wanted to make Kakashi feel good while also instinctively needing to taste him before taking him inside to relieve that damn knot that lingered throughout his heat. Iruka then sucked Kakashi, putting as much as he could in his mouth and moving his head back and forth while listening to the hoarse, guttural moans of the police officer, who held himself back so as not to move his body too much and disturb the omega in his movements.
Iruka was grateful that Kakashi was so obedient at times like this.
Kakashi bit his lower lip so hard that the metallic taste of blood flooded his mouth. He was holding himself back from simply grabbing Iruka by the back of his neck and fucking him in the throat until he choked: it seemed aggressive, but they would both enjoy it. He was holding back because he wanted to let the omega satisfy himself, even though it was consuming him inside. It felt like he was going to go into heat at any moment, even though they knew Kakashi's rut would still take a little longer. He opened one eye to see Iruka sucking him hard, tears welling up and streaming from the corners of his eyes, his face contorted with pleasure and effort... And that was enough for him to come inside Iruka.
And the omega swallowed, with relish, every drop that Kakashi had expelled.
It just drove him crazy. There was no other explanation, no other word, or even another feeling.
After Iruka removed Kakashi's member with an audible “pop” from his mouth and ran his tongue over his lips, Kakashi didn't hesitate to lift him up and fuck him right there, the omega's body pressed against the kitchen counter. It was exactly what Iruka wanted, what he craved, the knot slowly loosening inside him as Kakashi thrust deliciously against him, his legs dangling in the air as the alpha handled him with ease, as if he weighed less than a feather. Iruka had never been pierced by such pleasure before in his entire life, and he cried once more as he reached his peak, begging Kakashi to kiss him.
Their entire week was filled with moments like this, until Iruka's heat was over. Once it came to an end, they both felt physically destroyed, but satisfied. Absurdly satisfied, as they could never have felt before. Fortunately, they still had a few more days of leave to recover properly and resume their normal daily routine.
Once again, Kakashi was the first to wake up. Now he knew that Iruka would not wake up thirsty for sex. The omega continued to sleep peacefully, his breathing steady and calm. Kakashi kissed the top of his head — between moments of sanity, he had taken a shower just like the alpha, as he had the night before before falling asleep — and got up, tidying up everything he could despite his aching body. Even though he was a trained police officer with the physique of a professional athlete, a week of doing what they had done was not for everyone. Kakashi cleaned the house thoroughly, leaving everything tidy for when Iruka woke up so he wouldn't have to face the mess the two of them had made without regrets.
He was finishing tidying up the drawers in the bedroom furniture — he had left the room for last, the rest of the house was sparkling and spotless — when he noticed a detail that made him gulp: the boxes of condoms they had bought remained untouched inside the furniture next to Iruka's bed.
They hadn't used any protection during that whole week.
Notes:
Appearing earlier this time! I promised I wouldn't take long, and I kept my promise <3
What did you think??? I hope you liked it!!!!! Tell me everything <3
The next chapter will be a flashback because I love prolonging the suspense! Just giving you a heads up, hehe.
Big hugs and kisses!!!!!!
Chapter 23: Letters
Summary:
A flashback into Kakashi's story.
Notes:
enjoy the chapter <3 sorry the delay :(
song: Must Be Love - Niall Horan
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
If it feels like love
Then it must be love
— Bakashi!
Kakashi really thought he had found a hidden, quiet place to read during his free period, but he was wrong. It took Obito less than half an hour to find him, and now his space under the gym stairs was no longer hidden, much less quiet.
Yes, Obito's mere presence meant there was no calm at all.
— You're not reading your perverted books, are you? — the omega asked, trying to peek curiously over the alpha's shoulder. Kakashi had closed the book and turned the cover away from him.
— No. And I don't read perverted books. It's all literature...
— Perverse literature, Bakashi. — Obito teased with a chuckle that elicited a deep eye roll from Kakashi. — If you do that too often, your irises will disappear someday, you know that?
— Really? — Obito sat down next to him under the stairs and Kakashi stared at him only to roll his eyes again. — If I do that, huh?
— You bet...
— Oh, my God. Ma... — Kakashi was rolling his eyes for the third time when he stopped his irises just below his eyelids on purpose, to pretend he wouldn't be able to complete the movement. — Obito, I think they're stuck!
— Kakashi, I warned you! — The Uchiha was already on his feet again, grabbing Kakashi by the shoulders in desperation. His fear elicited a loud and unusual laugh from the silver-haired boy, who had “put” his irises in the right place and laughed with his eyes closed. — That wasn't funny. — Obito pouted, sitting down next to him with his arms crossed.
— It was to me. — Kakashi paused to recover from his fit of laughter, then turned his face fully toward Obito. — What are you doing here? Skipping remedial classes?
— Is it that obvious?
— Well, it's to be expected. I'm skipping advanced calculus classes and you're skipping remedial classes. Everything's in order.
— Except you have the kind of problems I wish I had. That would save me a lot of friction with my parents...
— Ah, they're not that bad, Obito. They just think you can do better...
— They don't even treat you well, and you always defend them.
Kakashi had no answer to that jab. Obito realized he had gone too far and sighed, regretting it the next second.
— I'm sorry.
— It's okay, Obito. I really... You know I try not to take it personally.
— Because you're a very good person. And my parents... They're weird. You know how they are. — Kakashi didn't comment on that.
He and Obito had been friends forever. In fact, they belonged to a trio: the two of them and Rin, their best friend. They had met at school many years ago, considering that now all three were in high school and, consequently, around seventeen years old. They were practically completing that phase of their lives, and each had already made their next decisions, even if they hadn't materialized yet: Obito wanted to be a writer, so he would study literature at Tokyo University — or Osaka — Rin wanted to study something in the health field — she was torn between medicine and psychology — while Kakashi wanted to follow in his father's military career, so he would enlist in the Police Academy as soon as he graduated from high school. Although very different, the trio of friends shared one common trait: they were all very determined.
Determined when it came to academics, because in their love lives...
Obito and Kakashi liked each other, and that was obvious to everyone — except each other. Kakashi could swear that Obito liked Rin — relationships between omegas had become more common and more socially accepted in recent years — while Obito was sure that Kakashi had no interest in him whatsoever, since he had already tried every possible approach to make his interest clear and Kakashi never seemed to care, always too busy doing something else.
Still, the term “give up” didn't seem to belong in Obito's vocabulary.
Even though Rin had never shown any interest in Obito, since she was always with someone, whether it was a boy or a girl, casually, Kakashi was sure that Obito was interested in her because of the way he looked at her. But Obito didn't admire Rin because he had a romantic attraction to her, he admired her because she was simply not afraid to be herself — and not just in romantic relationships. In everything. Rin was authentic in every possible way, and Obito wanted to be like her, even if it meant facing his family. In fact, confronting his family was what Obito wanted to do most, and it was a daily and cumulative effort. He had been doing this every day since he revealed himself as an omega two years ago, at the age of fifteen.
When Obito was born, his parents were overjoyed at his arrival. Since he was a boy, both Fugaku and Mikoto were absolutely certain — even without evidence — that he would be an alpha. Obito grew up and was becoming a tall man, with muscles and a broader build, which contradicted any speculation that he might be an omega, since this gender is mainly characterized by more delicate, rounded features, coming from a body capable of bearing children. Obito did not seem to fit into this category, until one day, while studying with Kakashi, the alpha was overwhelmed by a strong smell of cinnamon. And Obito was sweating and hyperventilating, while the smell came in strong waves from him. Kakashi, fortunately, managed to control himself, despite being overcome by instinct for a few seconds.
Kakashi was there when Obito revealed himself to be an omega, and he never forgot the cutting look Fugaku gave him a week later when he went to the Uchiha house as Obito was — as if Kakashi were to blame for his firstborn being an omega. Although they didn't know it at the time, Fugaku and Mikoto would later have two more boys — Itachi and Sasuke — and even though the couple had once again hoped for sons, none of the Uchiha boys were alphas.The only alpha Obito's age who lived with them was Kakashi: an outsider, a boy raised by a single father who did not come from a prestigious family like the Uchihas. He was just a Hatake, and he was born alpha — something that had not happened with the generation born to Mikoto and Fugaku.Kakashi would never admit it out loud, but he was sure that the two's issues with him had started there, even though it wasn't his fault that he was born an alpha.
It was mere chance — it was fate. It was absurdly beyond his control and choice.
— It's okay, Obito. You shouldn't worry about me. — Kakashi tried to comfort his friend. He wanted to put a hand on his shoulder, but as a teenager he was terrible at physical touch. Even though he really wanted to touch Obito. Being this close was already a complete victory for Kakashi.
— Why shouldn't I? — Obito turned his face to him, his dark eyes more sparkling than ever.Kakashi always remembered black holes when he looked at Obito: his eyes attracted the alpha, made him want to dive into that black immensity. — You're one of the most important people to me.
— Am I? — The question came automatically, too fast for the boy to control himself and regret it later.
— Do you have doubts, Bakashi? You're so smart, but so dumb sometimes...
— Do you want to tell me something? — A silence lingered between the two. Obito usually always had something to say, so moments of total silence were extremely rare. Obito was always chattering, and Kakashi was always listening.
He loved listening to Obito.
— Yes, I do. — The omega broke the silence and stood up, having descended a few steps so that, even standing, he was face to face with Kakashi, who remained seated with the book on his lap. Obito now had his friend's full attention and knew it. — Actually, I've been sending signals to someone.
— Signals to someone...? — Kakashi didn't usually interrupt him or speak while listening, but this time he did so to make sure he was hearing correctly.
— Uh-huh, Bakashi. Subtle signals. Subtle signals at first, and then stronger, more obvious signals...
— What exactly are we talking about?
— I like this person. A lot. Too much. It even hurts sometimes because I like them so much... But this person just doesn't get my signals, and I don't know what to do anymore. I've tried physical closeness, but they're not the hugging type. I've tried to bring up the subject, but nothing seems to catch their attention or make them read between the lines... — Obito was always referring to “the person”, but of course Kakashi was thinking it was a girl. His heart was sinking in his chest like a stone sinking in a river; slowly, and more and more with every word Obito said.
— I'm sorry, Obito, but... — His throat was dry. — Are we talking about Rin? — He needed to be sure so he could bury those feelings for Obito once and for all.
Obito frowned, unsure of what he had just heard. Maybe he had just discovered he was deaf.
— What?
Kakashi couldn't believe he was going to have to repeat himself.
— Do you like Rin, Obito? — He repeated, more serious and direct. — That's what I'm asking. If you like Rin. — Kakashi tried hard to hide the tone of irritation.
Obito had frozen in front of him, as if he were a computer displaying the famous blue screen error. Kakashi could almost see the “loading” symbol on his forehead, as if Kakashi had said the most absurd thing in the world, the most difficult thing to understand.
And, for Obito, he did.
— Why do you think I like Rin? — Obito wanted to laugh, but ended up sounding harsh. He couldn't believe Kakashi's stupidity.
— Because... Because you always ask about her. You always want to know where she is, if she's coming, if I've talked to her about a certain subject, and... Whenever we're together, you look at her in a way that... — Kakashi snorted. — Anyway, Obito, you know I don't want to play Cupid for you guys. Because I'm terrible at it. You know me.
— I know you well. — Obito was smiling like an idiot.
— What's with that smile?
— Nothing, it's just... It's just that I've never seen you jealous before.
— Jealous? Me? Me jealous of Rin? Don't worry, I don't like her in that way. You're the one who likes her.
— I don't think it's Rin you like, Bakashi. — Obito was almost purring now, reveling in the jealousy Kakashi had let spill out in that tiny speech minutes ago. The omega's heart was leaping in his chest with joy, for he finally had confirmation of what he had been waiting for so long...
Kakashi liked him too. He liked him to the point of being jealous of Rin — which was cute and pathetic at the same time, because Rin would never look at Obito the way the silver-haired man thought she did. And the reverse would never happen either, because Obito only had eyes for Kakashi. He always had.
— Obito, you...
— Idiot, the nickname Bakashi suits you perfectly. — The omega was reclining in front of him, the mischievous smile still on his lips. — The person I like is you, silly.
Kakashi's heart leapt at that moment. Inevitably, he was staring at Obito with wide eyes, like an idiot. At that time, he didn't have a scar cutting across his eye yet — that would only happen on the same day Obito would tragically die.
— I...? — Kakashi sounded like an idiot; an adorable idiot, in Obito's view, who was still smiling slyly.
— You never picked up on my signals because you were too busy wondering if I liked Rin. You should think less and notice more, Hatake. — Obito was great with both words and actions, but since Kakashi hadn't picked up on his actions until now, he decided to be practical. He rested both hands on the alpha's thighs and, leaning over him, bent down at once to seal his mouth on Kakashi's.
That was their first kiss.
Kakashi responded immediately, and, as if unable to wait any longer, stood up to embrace Obito around the waist. The pheromones of the two teenagers consequently embraced each other as well: Kakashi's smoky scent with the comforting aroma of honey mixed with spices — a scent so unique to him, and which, as different as it was from Kakashi's, complemented his. Kakashi would become dependent on the pleasant sensations that only the traces of memories of Obito's scent brought him.
The two boys stayed like that for the rest of that afternoon: Kakashi put aside his book and class, just as Obito didn't even remember the make-up exam. They closed themselves off in a world that was theirs alone and that they would build over the next few years, accompanying the passing of the phases of their lives together.
The request to date came shortly after their first kiss: Kakashi made the request, since Obito had taken the initiative. The alpha had always been a person who thought too much, rationalized too much — he was practically an expert at closing himself off in his own thoughts, so much so that sometimes he deprived himself of experiencing certain situations because he thought too much. Obito was the opposite: he hated thinking and loved experimenting. The two balanced each other out, as well as bringing out the best in each other. As if they were two sides of the same coin, two halves of the same orange — cliché? Yes. But that was exactly how Kakashi felt.
Every time he looked at Obito, his heart was flooded with a wave of unconditional love. It came like an avalanche, actually. He couldn't pinpoint exactly when the feeling of friendship he had for Obito turned into love, but at some point that attraction began. He knew that. And if it felt like love, then most likely it was love. Of course, Kakashi was afraid that his feelings would not be reciprocated, afraid that those feelings were for Rin, but all that passed. And after they declared their love for each other, starting with that kiss on the stairs, he never again felt insecure about what he felt for Obito, or what Obito felt for him.
Their relationship was built on solid foundations, as were their engagement and, later, their marriage.
Obito's parents, of course, did not take kindly to the idea of their son dating Kakashi. But Kakashi was prepared for this, considering his history with Fugaku and Mikoto. This did not discourage him, especially since Obito was always the first to stand up for him, support him, and defend him. Even if it meant going against his own family: because, eventually, Obito knew that he and Kakashi would become a family, building that precious nucleus.
A year later, they graduated from high school. Obito decided to study Language and Literature at the University of Tokyo, while Kakashi had already made the decision to pursue a career in law enforcement: he enrolled in the military. He had been determined since childhood to follow in the footsteps of his father, Sakumo, who was also a police officer. Rin, in turn, enrolled in the medical program, also at the University of Tokyo. Everything seemed to be going according to plan for the three of them. Kakashi met Asuma around this time, and when they turned nineteen, Mikoto became pregnant for the second time and Itachi was born. Obito did not expect his parents to have more children, but he was extremely happy with the arrival of a baby in the family. It was one of his biggest dreams to become a father someday, and he would like to do so alongside Kakashi. Fugaku was certain that this time he would have an alpha son—little did he know that Itachi would reveal himself to be a beta a few years later. Five years later, they had Sasuke—the youngest of the family. Fugaku was also certain that Sasuke would turn out to be alpha, just like Itachi, who was only five years old. They would be what Obito had not been, and Kakashi's boyfriend pretended that it didn't hurt him.
Kakashi was already working as a police officer, albeit at a low rank, at that time, at the age of twenty-four. Obito had finished college and was doing a distance learning Master's degree at Osaka University, as well as writing his first book. Rin was finishing her medical degree, which was a little longer than her friends'. Everything seemed fine, and to make matters better, Kakashi and Obito got engaged during that period. At the end of the year, they decided to get married and move in together. Fugaku and Mikoto harbored the false hope that Obito would “open his eyes” and abandon Kakashi, but of course that didn't happen. The wedding ceremony was small, bringing together only family and close friends, nothing too extravagant, but absurdly special. Also at the end of the year, Obito published his first book, a novel titled “Cities that Sleep Within Us — 「僕らの中に眠る街]”.
The synopsis of the book had been written by Obito's master's advisor, a frightening woman named Ōtsutsuki Kaguya, who deeply admired Obito:
“Some cities live on in us long after we have left them.
A novel about memory and belonging. Among silent streets, lit windows, and fleeting encounters, Obito Uchiha leads us through an intimate narrative in which places become characters as alive as people.
It is a story about the invisible heritage we carry: the landscapes that shape our affections, the corners that hold old versions of ourselves, and the ties that bind us to times that will never return.
Poetic, delicate, and deeply human, Cities That Sleep Within Us is a book about learning to live with what does not return, but never ceases to exist within us.”
Obito's second novel, published the following year, was titled “The Sea Forgets No One — 「海は誰も忘れない」.” Kakashi had been tasked with writing the synopsis this time, and he did so gladly for his husband.
“The waves take, the waves return. But nothing is lost to the sea.
In this lyrical novel, Obito Uchiha transforms the sea into a metaphor for collective memory, love, and impossible forgetting.
The narrative follows different characters united by water—sailors, travelers, lovers, orphans—who find in the ocean not only a place of departure, but also of return.
With melancholic and hypnotic writing, Obito creates a portrait of what remains even when everything else seems to have been erased. The sea forgets no one is an ode to the persistence of memory, to love that resists time, and to the echo of voices that never cease to call us back.”
The third book published was a collection of short stories, three years after the wedding, of which Kakashi had that special copy with the dedication that still filled his eyes with tears more than ten years after Obito had left those words for him.
“To you,
who taught me to see beauty around every corner,
who made silence a shelter.
Who never needed many words to understand me.
If this book is read by others, I hope they see the world.
But if it is you who holds it now,
I hope you see me,
between the lines.
Forever yours,
O.”
Two years passed before Mikoto became pregnant with Sasuke's child, and unexpectedly, Rin revealed that she was also pregnant. She was pursuing her doctorate, a trained physician, but still honing her studies, when she unexpectedly became pregnant after a casual night out. She didn't want to talk to the person involved, as they had shown no interest in the baby — and the omega was determined to go through with it. Even though Obito had lectured her, he supported her unconditionally. Kakashi felt the same way, and they would never leave Rin at the mercy of others. Thus, nine months later, both Sasuke and little Sakura came into the world. A couple who were close friends of Kakashi and Obito, Minato and Kushina, also had a baby boy: Naruto. From this would come the famous trio of friends in the future.
Kakashi would never forget the first time he held the little girl in his arms, still in the hospital. She was smaller than his forearm and fit perfectly in his arms. She was tiny, but still real.
Rin, tired but smiling, lying on the hospital bed, looked at him and whispered:
— She'll end up thinking you're her real father, 'Kashi.
And, in a way, she wasn't so wrong.
The two became a kind of “godparents” to Sakura. Rin could count on them to continue her doctorate, and she wasn't far from completing it. Obito, on the other hand, had always been completely in love with the little girl. He lit up just thinking about her.
The first months of motherhood were exhausting for Rin, but also filled with a happiness that surprised her. She studied, took care of her daughter, laughed at Obito's blunders, and let herself be lulled by Kakashi's companionable silence. The trio took turns in the early hours of the morning: sometimes it was Obito who picked Sakura up from her crib, sometimes Kakashi appeared with a bottle ready, and Rin, even though exhausted, felt welcomed. Even though Rin lived apart from the two, she ended up practically moving into her friends' house during those first few months, and they became her biggest support network at the beginning of her life as a mother.
It was during this period that the first signs of the disease appeared: joint pain, low fever that came and went, fatigue that did not match her age or apparent health. Rin knew something was wrong. As a doctor, she quickly recognized what was happening, but it took her a while to accept it. The confirmation came from the doctor she was consulting: lupus. The diagnosis hit everyone like a ton of bricks, but Rin, with her characteristic calm, tried to go on with her life as if nothing had changed.
The following months were a painful contrast: Sakura grew up smart and cheerful, pulling her mother's hair, smiling at any face that approached, while Rin became increasingly fragile and visibly weak, not just physically. Exhaustion prevented her from keeping up with her shifts and her doctorate, and even simple activities at home became difficult. She hid her fears, but in intimate conversations with Obito and Kakashi, she talked about her daughter's future. She asked, almost pleading, that they not leave her alone. Obito cried and said she wouldn't leave them, while Kakashi just nodded to reassure her, silently — because he knew there was no promise easier to keep.
Rin's last year was divided between hospitalizations and periods at home. Even though she was weak, she found the strength to write letters to Sakura, believing that one day her daughter would be able to read them. In one of them, she wrote: “If I can't teach you how to live, I hope that when you open these pages, you will feel how much I loved you. And never doubt that you brought light into the world.” However, she made Kakashi promise that Sakura would read those letters at twenty-one, when she was effectively an adult. Rin didn't want to be a ghost in the life of her daughter, who, while she was alive, was only one year old. She wanted Sakura to know her when she was mature enough to understand, even if only a little, the person she had been — selfish? Perhaps. But both Kakashi and Obito understood. As hard as it was to swallow, they were both getting used to the idea that Rin, their best childhood friend, would leave them.
Sakura would be all she would leave them: and Sakura became their whole world.
Her departure left an unbearable void, but it also cemented the promise that would be kept until the end: Obito and Kakashi would never let Sakura grow up without a family, helpless, or feeling inadequate. She would be surrounded by love, pure and sincere love, and, as a result, Sakura became love too. The unconditional love that her parents always showered her with. The pain of losing Rin still reverberated today, and of course Obito and Kakashi decided to adopt Sakura. She was surrounded not only by their love, but it extended to their families: Sakumo, Mikoto, Fugaku, Itachi, Sasuke, Minato, Kushina, Naruto, Asuma, Kurenai — even though the latter were only friends — and the routine of the two continued. Obito tried to write more, but it seemed that his creativity, or most of it, for writing had faded with Rin's departure. Fortunately, his published works were returning to him with good sales and visibility — it was what he deserved most.
As much as it hurt, their lives went on. Between Obito's messy coffees, loud music in the car, family trips to the market, children's parties, adventures with Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, and their other school friends — their days were filled with joy and adult life went on, even with Rin's absence, which hurt everyone, especially Kakashi and Obito.
This lasted six years, until the tragic day that should have been just another normal day: Obito had just picked Sakura up from school, just like every other day. Kakashi had been on duty for a few days; he did this more often in the past since Obito worked from home, so he could get more days off. He wasn't an inspector at that time yet.
The alpha was involved in an investigation that, weeks later, would prove to be bigger and more complex than anyone expected. It was about an organized group, already known to the police, that had begun to cross dangerous lines: trafficking, theft, threats. Kakashi had gotten too close, discovered too much. He did a lot of field work, something he was required to stop doing after taking more than a year's leave from the police — and so he had become an inspector.
When the criminals realized they couldn't get to him directly, they decided to target those who were unprotected. Even though Kakashi wasn't even the leader of the investigation, apparently his family was the easiest to target.
That's how Obito became a target. He wasn't a police officer, he had no connection to that world. He was a writer who spent his days at home, taking care of his daughter and writing his novels. Except that afternoon, he was in the wrong place at the wrong time: in the family car, on his usual route to pick up Sakura from school. And it shouldn't have been the wrong time or the wrong place. It should have been just another ordinary day in his family's life — and Kakashi had been unable to read the next moves of the very person he was investigating.
And the people he loved most had paid the price for his inattention.
The attack was swift. The car window shattered before Obito could react in any meaningful way. He instinctively placed himself between the armed men and his daughter, trying to buy precious seconds. His resistance, however, came at a high price. He was dragged out of the car and fatally struck on the head. Sakura screamed, but her voice was lost in the noise of tires, broken glass, and screams.
When the police arrived, Kakashi among them, bleeding from an eye injured during the confrontation with the attackers, it was too late. Obito's body lay on the asphalt, a few meters from the still-running car. He had lost consciousness, unable to defend himself, and did not survive the serious injury. The image haunted Kakashi's mind, and he was grateful that Asuma was there hugging his daughter. Sakura did not have that terrifying vision of Obito like Kakashi did, and that comforted the alpha's heart.
The mourning was immediate, but also silent. There was too much blood at the scene, and there were also unanswered questions. Kakashi collapsed right there, in front of his husband's body. He ignored the pain of his own injury, the scar that would remain forever, and could only stare at what was left of Obito, as if hoping it was a lie. He was quickly covered at the request of the police officer, who didn't even realize how much he was crying. The love of your life immobile, completely lifeless, before your eyes is not an image that people usually think they will ever see, or prepare themselves psychologically for. Kakashi was... destroyed.
And he would still be consumed entirely by guilt.
For Obito's parents, there was no doubt: Kakashi was to blame. If he hadn't gotten involved in that job, if he hadn't put the family on the radar of criminals, none of this would have happened. And even though the police later confirmed that the men had been arrested, that the attack was linked to an investigation that had begun long before Kakashi's intervention, there was no relief.
Nothing would bring Obito back.
The alpha carried that guilt like a second skin as the years passed. There was no way to deny the accusation. His work had, in fact, put Obito at risk.
What sustained him in his grief was only a silent promise: that he would do everything in his power to protect Sakura from then on, so that she would want for nothing, so that she would grow up exactly as he, Obito, and Rin intended, even though he didn't even feel like a complete person after so many losses. He and Sakura had lost so much, and Kakashi inevitably plunged into a horrible period of depression. Added to that, he lost the ability to sense pheromones, in addition to the absurd pain felt when a partner dies, stemming from the bond that alphas and omegas can have from the bite, which was the case with Obito and Kakashi.
Still, nothing else seemed to matter. Kakashi lived many years solely for Sakura. This was not entirely healthy: little by little, he resumed a life he could call his own, even though he often felt like a mere shell of his former self.
Until Iruka appeared. And changed everything.
As for Obito's writings, he had left some incomplete manuscripts. One of them would prove to be Kakashi's favorite, which Obito had titled “Letters After the Rain — 「雨の後に残る手紙」.” It was a fragmentary epistolary novel, full of loose notes, scribbled margins, and incomplete pages, where everyday life was mixed with delicate confidences, memories, and fears that Obito did not dare to say aloud. It was a very subjective novel, in which the recipient of all the letters...
...was Kakashi.
Each letter seemed to capture almost invisible moments of intimacy: the smell of rain in Japan, the sound of footsteps in the empty hallway, the warmth of a memory that only he and Kakashi shared. Whenever Kakashi read those lines, he felt so close to Obito that each word seemed whispered, as if he were there, present, even if absent. Kakashi knew that exposing them would be unfair—the letters were too private, too incomplete, and held the essence of Obito in a way that only he could understand. So he kept them locked away, never published them, allowing them to live only in his memory, preserved as living reminders of a bond that even death could not erase. Not even Sakura had had access to those manuscripts yet. It seemed silly, but Kakashi still wanted to keep them to himself, even if it upset the girl when she found out. Maybe it was because he had only found out about that draft after his death. It always made Kakashi's chest tighten absurdly.
Among the notebooks, some fragments stood out, written in Obito's irregular handwriting, where he had started not just one, but several letters that he would never finish:
“Kakashi,
Today Sakura tried to make pancakes by herself and, as you can imagine, the kitchen is... a mess. She laughed so hard she almost knocked over the whole bowl, and I couldn't stop laughing either.
I think you would have been angry, but in a funny way, you know? That way you do when you try to be serious and end up smiling secretly—”
The rest of the page was blank, except for a few crossed-out words and small notes in the corners: “I need to get Sakura before she spills more eggs” and “Kakashi will find this cute”. The letter ended abruptly, as if Obito had been called away by a small mess in the bathroom or by Sakura asking for help cleaning up the mess. Kakashi, as always when reading, felt that familiar and comforting warmth of their daily life, the simple and constant love they shared, and how every moment, even if interrupted, became a precious memory.
And that wasn't the only letter.
“Kakashi,
Today I was thinking about how you always let your coffee cool down before drinking it, as if time were slow to pass just for you. I should have told you, but I ended up getting lost looking at you on the couch, reading that old book you insist on rereading...
I wanted to tell you that I like every detail: how you frown when you concentrate, how your hair falls over your eyes when you lean forward, how your fingers fidget with the pen...
I was going to continue, I wanted to write about last night, when we laughed until we couldn't laugh anymore and you almost spilled your tea... but the door slammed, and I had to —”
The next page was also blank, with only a few ink scribbles and the incomplete sentence: “...and I wanted to hug you before...”. The interruption gave the letter a sweet weight: it was real life invading the moment of intimacy, but it also made each word more alive, more Obito.
Kakashi knew he would never feel that love again, because what he and Obito had cultivated was theirs alone. He would never have anything like that again, because it had been interrupted, broken, all at once, overnight. However, that never meant he should have closed himself off to love, that he didn't deserve to feel love again. He was relearning to let himself go once more, even if it was for a completely different person and, consequently, a completely different love.
But still, light.
And only his and Iruka's.
Notes:
SO MUCH has happened this week... the trailer for JJK and Sabrina's new album are what moved me. In fact, this album is so IRUKA that I've already added some new songs to my playlist, hehe.
I ended up taking a while because I'm “just” writing my master's thesis and studying for the selection test that will be at the end of this month, so please wish me luck <3<3<3
The next one won't take long because I'm very inspired and luckily I have more time on the weekend lol
Did you guys see the Naruto toys at BK? I had to act like a kid and get a junior combo just to choose the Kakashi doll... he was my supervisor while I was writing this chapter... they should make an Iruka doll...
Tell me what you thought of the chapter (if you want) <3 I love reading and responding to everything!!!!!!
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