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Chatting All Titans

Summary:

Being a teenaged superhero is hard - but at least they don't have to go at it alone.

Chatfic.

Notes:

What’s this? Another crossover fic?
So this is a chat fic (mainly). It’s mostly a fun side project, so it’s not going to be the heaviest edited, but hopefully it’s as fun to read as it is to write!
Timeline notes:
DP - not Phantom Planet compliant. I haven’t seen every episode of Danny Phantom, although I’ve seen most, so apologies in advance for any continuity problems.
Teen Titans - after Season 5.
Miraculous Ladybug - after the episode in Season 4 where Marinette tells Alya she’s ladybug, but pretending the temporary heroes never had their identities revealed. Not caught up past early season 4. Also, background Alyanette for this.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Prologue

Chapter Text

Prologue

It took three weeks and five days before Robin was happy with the updates to the communicators. 

He was so angry - angry at himself for falling for Madam Rouge’s trick, mostly. He knew that she could disguise herself as others, she had literally done it early. But he had been tired, and stressed, and worried for the other titans. 

And it had been three weeks and six days since they defeated the Brotherhood of Evil, so it was time to focus on something else.

He landed on the roof silently, surveying the scene. The building was abandoned - the Brotherhood of Evil was defeated, their equipment confiscated, their members arrested. Most of the investigation had ended, although there were still some questions about the long-term effects of being frozen. 

But the roof was occupied that night. It was, after all, a good meeting location - still in Paris, but past Hawkmoth’s suspected range. 

Robin landed silently, but made noise as he stood up. Making his presence known. 

Ladybug turned towards him. 

“Robin?” 

“Thought it was about time I introduced myself,” Robin replied. 

He held a hand out, and Ladybug shook it. 

The original idea was to leave Paris alone. Hawkmoth could turn anyone into a supervillain, so it was better if the already-deadly trained heroes stayed away. 

But the Brotherhood of Evil had set up their base here. It was a bold (stupid) move that ticked off everyone involved, but it did give Robin a reason to reach out to the Parisian heroes.

“It’s an honor to meet you,” Ladybug said. “Although, we do appreciate the hands-off approach. I do not want to see Superman or Batman akumatized.”

“Yeah, us either. But after the Brotherhood of Evil set up base here, I think we need a way to stay in contact.” 

“I’ve been working on that, actually,” Ladybug said. “My yo-yo works as a communicator. And I have all these security measures set up-“

She had a lot of security measures set up - Ladybug had a similar paranoia around her secret identity that Robin had.

It took a minute to figure out how to link the miraculous-magic yo-yo to the Titan’s communication system, but eventually Ladybug’s symbol popped up on Robin’s communicator.  

“Great,” Robin said. “Oh, just so you know, Bumblebee is setting up an event - she’s calling it Titans’ Prom. It’s next Thursday, if you’re interested. Harold will be there to send anyone back if there’s a villain attack.”

“Prom?” Ladybug asked. “So, super formal and romantic?”

“Doesn’t have to be romantic,” Robin said. “But pretty formal, yeah.”

It would have been Bumblebee’s senior year, if she had stayed at her old school. So she had decided that she “was not missing senior prom,” and now Titans East was holding the big event. 

Robin didn’t understand it, but then again, he had willingly and quite happily left his school in Gotham. Bumblebee hadn’t had the same choice. 

Besides, Starfire was excited about it.

“I’ll be there, if there isn’t an Akuma,” Ladybug said. 

“The invitation is extended to you and Chat Noir,” Robin said, “and feel free to bring a plus one.”

Ladybug nodded. 

A beep from her yo-yo ended the conversation - there was an Akuma she had to go deal with - so they quickly said goodbye and parted ways.

“See you Friday,” Ladybug said before yo-yoing away.


“I’m so glad we’re doubling up on these assignments now!” Starfire said. 

“Yeah,” Raven replied. “As far as Robin’s paranoia goes, this isn’t too bad.”

Ever since Brotherhood of Evil separated the titans to ambush them alone, Robin’s insisted on no Titan being solo on missions. 

Of course, his own mission didn’t count. Something about Paris being dangerous and no need to risk having more people there. Hypocrite.

Amity was small, for somewhere with so much villain activity. Raven could feel the thrum of a portal - the source of most of the problems in town, although good old greed caused its fair share. 

Cyborg had the T-Car, so Raven and Starfire had driven a rental car. It had been a hassle to find a rental car they could rent as teenagers, and Raven was determined to return it better than new. Just to make a point. 

She parked the rental car on the top of a hill, overlooking a park. It was a frequent location of the hero they were looking for.

Phantom. It had been an ongoing argument for a year whether to reach out to him, since information coming out of Amity was so spotty and conflicting and Phantom handled different types of situations than the rest of the titans. But as they talked with the other, newer titans, who had more experience with ghosts, it became clearer. 

Raven and Starfire waited outside the car. Amity had less light pollution than Jump City, letting the stars shine bright in the sky. In fact, they seemed a little too clear, even for Middle of Nowhere, Nebransas, or wherever they were. 

“You two don’t look like locals.”

Raven and Starfire turned. 

It was hard to sneak up on them, but then again, Phantom was a ghost. 

He was flying upside down, hands behind his head in faux casualness. There was an aura around him - probably not visible to most, not even Starfire, but Raven could see the ectoplasm green pulsing from and around him. He was a powerful ghost, if newly dead, and still very much a teenager. 

“We’re not!” Starfire replied cheerfully. “I am Starfire, and this is Raven.“

“Oh, I know who you are.” Phantom straightened out, still hovering over the ground. “What brings you to Amity?”

“You do,” Raven said. “Robin wants to extend our network of heroes. He sent us to give you this.” 

She held out a communicator - now updated with even more security. 

“By extending your network, you mean…”

“You’re invited to join the titans!” Starfire said. 

“I - the titans?” Phantom asked. “Me? You don’t think I’m a villain or, evil, or something?”

“Why?” Raven challenged. “Just because you’re a ghost? We aren’t like that.” 

“Hm,” Phantom replied. His eyes were still fixed on the communicator. 

“Oh, we are also holding a party!” Starfire added. “It is called the prom? I am told it is a high school tradition here, that many titans would otherwise miss if we did not hold one ourselves! It is this Thursday at the Titans East.”

“That sounds fun.” Phantom finally grabbed the communicator. “I’ll see you there?” 

“Maybe,” Raven said. 

Starfire elbowed her (lightly) in the ribs.

“Of course you will! We look forward to seeing you there!”


“Pound it!”

Ladybug checked her earrings quickly - still three minutes left. She had enough time for this conversation. 

“Hey Chat,” she called. “Can we talk?”

Chat Noir glanced at his ring, and nodded. 

They left the scene of the akuma, where the victim was being greeted by his crying parents, and landed at a nearby rooftop. 

“The Titans contacted me,” Ladybug said. 

“The Titans!” Chat Noir repeated. “That’s so cool! Wait, why were they contacting you? They know you’re needed in Paris, right?”

“Right,” Ladybug confirmed. “They just wanted to set up a communication channel with us… and they invited me to a party. Prom, actually.” 

“When?”

“Thursday.” Ladybug stood up and started to pace. “I know you probably want to go too, but one of us needs to stay here to contact the other, and they asked me, so I figured it would only be polite if-“

“It’s fine,” Chat Noir said. “I would only want to go if I went with you - as friends, of course!” 

“Okay, if you’re fine with it. I was going to ask Rena if she could go with me.” 

“Sounds good,” Chat Noir said. “A lot of people go to prom with friends.” 

“Um, well…” Her earrings beeped. “Got to go, talk to you later!”

She threw her yoyo, glad to get out of that conversation.

“Uh, talk to you later?” Chat Noir replied. 


 

“Prom” was maybe not the best word for the party at Titans East. 

It was definitely a party. Cyborg had rigged up a music system, and Titans East had a disco ball. There was plenty of food - even vegetarian options - and lots of card and board games. 

There was some dancing, especially among the few couples that had shown up. Lots more game playing, and storytelling as everyone talked about the different villains they faced. There were some ridiculous stories, and even the more serious ones brought laughter.

Beast Boy told the story of the final battle with the Brotherhood of Evil - with Panthera’s occasional interjections. Cyborg and Bumblebee were off to the side, sharing a bowl of chips, smirking at the story.  

Most of the Titans had been there. Danny had not - he didn’t know the reasons why they had only reached out to him now, but he was glad they did.  

Sam and Tucker knew him well, but there were things they didn’t understand. And none of the other Titans were half-ghost, but. 

But at some point, at what had to be after midnight, Danny ended up on a couch still talking to Beast Boy. It had started as a joke battle, but then they kept talking. 

He had never met someone who got it. Who understood what it meant to be a normal human one day, and something else the next. 

It was nice.



Chapter 2: Chapter 1: The Rules of the Chat

Summary:

kentucky fried: this titan fenifintely does eat
kentucky fried: *denidintely
kentucky fried: whatever

Notes:

The best thing about this was letting all my typos just become part of the story.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat has been created 

 

Robin: Hey all. I was thinking after last night that we could use a more casual channel of conversation. 

Robin: also thanks Bumblee and Titans East for hosting last night 

Robin: *bumblebee 

Cyborg: bumblee 

Beast Boy: bumblee 

Bumblebee: lol

Bumblebee changed name to Bumblee

Beast Boy changed name to green bean 

Ladybug: yes, thanks Bumblebee. It was a blast last night! 

Ladybug: also just a warning my English is not the best 

Bumblee: it sounded fine last night 

Ladybug: my miraculous translates for me when I’m transformed 

Bumblee: oh cool 

Starfire: hello everyone! It is such an honor to talk to so many heroes! 

Raven: yeah hi 

Raven: anyways I’m muting this 

Robin changed name to big bird

big bird: no I didn’t? 

Rena Rouge: ohhhh this is so cool! 

Rena Rouge: i have so many questions for everyone! 

Rena Rouge: !!! 

Ladybug: breathe, Rena 

Speedy: lol Bumblee 

big bird: yeah we’ve moved past that

Aqualad: not very speedy of you 

Kid Flash: turtle.png 

Kid Flash: ew real name 

Kid Flash changed name to kentucky fried 

kentucky fried: there we go 

kentucky fried: anywho hi everyone 

kentucky fried: i didnt talk to many last night cause i actually had a girlfriend? to take to prom? very weird 

big bird: my thoughts exactly 

big bird changed name to Robin 

kentucky fried: ew

kentucky fried: change it back

kentucky fried: also speedy change ur name everyone keeps calling me that 

Speedy: no

Speedy: nobugsbunny.gif 

kentucky fried: please i am begging you 

Speedy: then beg 

Phantom: oh hey living people

Phantom changed name to Icy Dead People

Starfire: please, why are you icy? 

Icy Dead People: oh, it’s a movie reference. Sixth Sense. There’s a character that says “I See Dead People.” It sounds like Icy Dead People. And since I’m dead, and arguably icy, and a people. So I thought it fit. 

Ladybug: how are you icy? 

Icy Dead People: i have ice powers 

Ladybug: makes sense 

Robin: alright so a couple of rules.

Robin changed name to bird brain 

bird brain: okay first of all stop doing that 

bird brain: I know that’s you KF 

kentucky fried: actually im innocent this time 

Cyborg: pressxtodoubt.png 

bird brain changed name to Robin 

Robin: Rule 1 is be respectful. No bigotry or bullying or anything. 

Ladybug: good rule 

Raven: are we still allowed to bully Beast Boy? 

Cyborg: I thought you muted us?

Raven: I did

Robin: technically that’s not bullying. 

Ladybug: what are the other rules? 

Robin: good question 

Icy Dead People: what about banned topics? Or people’s triggers? 

Robin: yes good point 

Robin: don’t trigger people on purpose. If anyone wants to bring up topics they’d like to avoid or have warnings for, I can include that in the rules 

Robin: you can DM me if you want it to be anonymously added 

Starfire: DM? What does that mean, please?

Robin: direct message 

Starfire: thank you! 

Bumblee: Titans Eats has to head out lmk of any more rules

Cyborg: Titans Eats? 

Starfire: best of luck with the villain fighting! 

kentucky fried: this titan fenifintely does eat

kentucky fried: *denidintely 

kentucky fried: whatever 

Jinx: this is what happens when you text at super speed babe

Starfire: hello friend Jinx! 

Jinx: didnt know I made it to the friend category yet 

Starfire: did you not want to be friends? 

Robin: you better say yes the sad face Star is making right now is devastating 

Starfire: you do not need to worry about my feelings 

Jinx: no no its fine I was just surprised 

Jinx: thought I would have a harder time being accepted here 

Starfire: of course you are accepted! We all got off to a rough start but we can find strength in each other! 

Icy Dead People: wait why wouldn’t you be accepted? 

Jinx: I was kinda a bad guy for a little bit

Jinx: well, for more than a little bit 

Jinx: long story short: I have bad luck powers. Thought that meant I was doomed to be a bad person. Realized I was wrong. Showed up in Paris to embarrass the BoE 

Jinx name changed to Friend Jinx 

Ladybug: we love embarrassing the bad guys here 

Rena Rouge: to be fair hm does most of the embarrassing himself 

Ladybug: yes that’s true

Ladybug: I don’t know how much of what happens reached the rest of the world but 

Ladybug: did you see the last Akuma? Ugliest design I’ve ever seen 

green bean: wait how did you do the emphasis

Ladybug: asterisks 

green bean: what? 

Ladybug: * on each side 

green bean: like this?

green bean: oh it worked 

Robin name changed to Red Robin. Yum.

Red Robin. Yum.: okay seriously whoev 

Red Robin. Yum.: never mind got to go Control Freak just appeared 

kentucky fried: he sounds fun 

Ladybug: probably beats fighting Mr Pigeon for the millionth time

Ladybug: poor chat’s allergic to feathers too

Icy Dead People: that sucks 

Jinx: talk about bad luck 

Panthera: oh hey new chat 

Herald: hello people

Ladybug: hi!  

Hotspot: hey

Hotspot: does anyone else frozen by the brotherhood still struggle with feeling cold?

kentucky fried: i didnt let myself get caught in the first place 

Friend Jinx: excuse me? 

kentucky fried: well okay i did get captured once 

kentucky fried: Jinx set me free 

kentucky fried: thx babe  

Friend Jinx: I think Speedy and Aqualad got frozen if you want to ask them when they get back? 

kentucky fried: where’d they go anyways? 

Rena Rouge: news shows Titans East fighting an Ice Kate and Kid Kold? 

Friend Jinx: oh them 

Friend Jinx: lol

Hotspot: are those ice themes? Yikes 

Icy Dead People: what’s wrong with ice powers? 

Hotspot: nothing. just hard to summon my hot stuff when I feel so cold 

Hotspot changed name to Hot n Cold 

Ladybug: jendjkaajz bdhdksjjzbsbzjzhsjwis 

Rena Rouge: babe? 

Ladybug: sorry, tripped while typing. Akuma attack. I’ll text you the address 

Ladybug: wait did you just call me babe 

Ladybug: aasfgghklsne 



Notes:

Oh also sorta doing a semi-canon with the Teen Titans comics. Might be some references to what happens in there, some things might completely contradict. That’s the fun of fanfiction.

Chapter 3: Chapter 2: A Chat in the Chat

Summary:

Not a Ninja: dude
Chat-aclysm: I’m sorry
Lucky Charm: no your not

Notes:

Team Miraculous Chat Names:
Lucky Charm: Ladybug
Chat-aclysm: Chat Noir
Not a Ninja: Carapace
Like A Good Neigh-bor: Pegasus
monkey busness: Roi Singe
major scales: Viperion
Titans Chat Names:
Birds of a Feather: Robin
green bean: Beast Boy

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Team Miraculous

major scales: … well? 

Lucky Charm: well what? 

Like A Good Neigh-bor: it’s been over two days and five Akuma attacks and you still haven’t told us how your time with the Teen Titans went 

monkey busness: yeah!

Not a Ninja: they told me 

Chat-aclysm: I’m pretty curious too

major scales: you better be careful chat. you know what they say about curiosity 

Chat-aclysm: Yeah I know that was leading up to a joke 

Chat-aclysm: You stole my punchline 

Lucky Charm: you should have had a more original joke then 

Chat-aclysm: My lady! You wound me!

Lucky Charm: good 

Lucky Charm: anyways Thursday night went well. The Titans all seem cool. Added me and Rena to a group chat afterwards 

Chat-aclysm: Apparently they invited me too but LB won’t let me in

major scales: wait why

Lucky Charm: he knows what he did

Chat-aclysm: I’m sorry, alright? 

Lucky Charm: for what, specifically, are you sorry for? 

Chat-aclysm: For making a bad joke?

Lucky Charm: specifically

Chat-aclysm: the fan one?

Lucky Charm: what. specific. joke. and. why

Chat-aclysm: I am sorry that when you summoned your luck charm, a fan, I made a joke that I was a fan and it distracted you and you almost dropped the fan 

Lucky Charm: there you go 

Chat-aclysm: I didn’t realize that it would bug you so much 

Not a Ninja: dude you are not helping your case 

Chat-aclysm: Sorry! I can’t help myself! 

Lucky Charm:

monkey busness: you had a fan lucky charm? Did you go all Mulan on them? 

Lucky Charm: it wasn’t that type of fan 

Lucky Charm: it was one of those handheld ones that spin when you hokd down a button, since I needed the air stream to blow constantly while Chat and I were busy with something else or the plan wouldn’t work 

Lucky Charm: *hold 

Chat-aclysm: Easily one of the most complicated lucky charms that I’ve seen 

Chat-aclysm: Can’t say I was a fan of it 

Not a Ninja: dude 

Chat-aclysm: I’m sorry 

Lucky Charm: no your not


Titans General Chat

green bean: who wants to take bets on how long control freak stays in prison this time

Birds of a Feather: it can’t be that hard to keep him away from screens while in prison 

Birds of a Feather: oh come on seriously?

Birds of a Feather name changed to ITS ROBIN

Cyborg: I give him a week

Speedy: no way three days at best 

green bean: alright what’s the wager

Herald: the loser does the others chores?

Speedy: your on

Cyborg: my chores are Cyborg-only, sorry 

ITS ROBIN: harold you don’t have to come up with reasons to come hang with us

Herald: Harold? 

ITS ROBIN: long day sorry 

Herald: lol it’s fine

Herald name changed to Harold

Speedy: if I win, you do my chores. If you win, I’ll try out that video game you keep trying to get me to play

Cyborg: works for me

green bean: the bet has been made

Ladybug: alright I’ve been mean enough to him 

Chat Noir has been added to the chat

Chat Noir: Hello

green bean: hi! 

ITS ROBIN: hello Chat Noir! Welcome! 

Speedy: hey 

Harold: hi other cat-themed superhero 

Panthera: chat noir! I demand we must fight to determine the stronger cat

Panthera: also hi

Cyborg: hello 

Rena Rouge: oh did LB finally give you the invite?

Chat Noir: Yeah finally 

Chat Noir: It is Paws-itively amazing to meet all of you! I’ve been a fan of the Titans fur furrever 

Ladybug: I have many regrets 

Rena Rouge: what did you think would happen? 

green bean: dude you can’t use fur twice like that that’s just lazy

Raven: and your jokes aren’t? 

green bean:

green bean: yeah that’s fair 

Panthera: I am not allowed in Paris so if we are to fight you’ll have to come here

Chat Noir: Aren’t you in Fevereiro? That’s pretty far for me

Panthera: that’s what Heralds for

Harold: I mean I do other stuff too 

Chat Noir: Okay I’m in 

Panthera: great! Prepare to be defeated! 

Ladybug: I don’t want to leave Paris if Chat Noir’s not here, but Rena will you video it for me?

Rena Rouge: absolutely 

green bean: any bets for the fight?

Harold: Panthera wins

Cyborg: yeah Panthera has my bet 

Chat Noir: That’s probably fair 

Ladybug: we’ll have to postpone. Akuma @ the Eiffel Tower 



Notes:

Yeah, so I’ll be slowly introducing the ML and DP characters into the main chat, just so everyone has time to adjust
Titans South is in Fevereiro, a city I made up because its DC.

Chapter 4: Chapter 3: Bug Out

Summary:

Bird’s I View: everyone was a valuable part in the battle against BoE
Icy Dead People: even me?
Bird’s I View: everyone who was there was a valuable part in the battle against BoE

Notes:

Bumblebee: Bumblee
Beast Boy: green bean
Kid Flash: kentucky fried
Phantom: Icy Dead People
Jinx: Friend Jinx
Robin: Birds I View
Hotspot: Hot n Cold
Herald: Harold
Panthera: Catfighter Supreme
Chat Noir: Pawsome

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat 

Icy Dead People: ugh I hate summer 

kentucky fried: homophobic

Icy Dead People: how? 

kentucky fried: its literally pride nonth 

kentucky fried: minth 

Friend Jinx: mispelling pride month? Homophobic 

Bird’s I View: misspelling misspelling? Ironic

green bean: hotel? trivago

Starfire: what is trivago please?

Bird’s I View: it’s a company whose slogan is hotel? trivago 

Starfire: thank you 

Starfire: friend Phantom, why do you dislike the summer?  

Icy Dead People: the short answer is it gets too hot

Aqualad: valid 

Icy Dead People: the long answer is that ghosts are dead. We are the absence of life, the silence of sound, the stillness in the forest, etc, blah blah blah. When atoms heat up, they move more, and ghost physiology doesn’t like that. Especially me with my ice powers 

Aqualad: Atlanteans also have lowered ability to deal with heat, since it doesn’t get very hot in Atlantis. Heat tolerance was actually one of the first human traits to go when we started evolving. 

Jericho: that makes sense. Humans can adapt and unadapt to hot climates fairly quickly.

green bean: jericho! hi!

Starfire: friend Jericho hello!

kentucky fried: hey jericho! 

Jericho: hello! 

Icy Dead People: Aqualad do you have any Atlantean pro tips for dealing with heat? 

Aqualad: hydrate 

Aqualad: although that might not apply since you are dead

Aqualad: maybe get a large hat? Keep the sun off your head?

Icy Dead People: hats fall off when I go intangible 

Speedy: I want to go intangible 

Icy Dead People: trust me it was not worth the cost 

Bird’s I View: I imagine it was not

kentucky fried: i joke but i dislike the heat too its way to easy to overheat going at superspeed 

Friend Jinx: heat suppresses my style 

Raven: skill issue

Friend Jinx: excuse me??? 

Catfighter Supreme: mjpopcorn.gif 

Ladybug: personally I’m excited for summer. No more school themed akumas 

Rena Rouge: yeah Pop Quiz sucked. Almost as bad as getting a pop quiz 

kentucky fried: a villain named pop quiz sounds like one of my nightmares 

Bird’s I View: reminds me of our first run in with Mad Mod

green bean: dont remind me

Cyborg: yeah that definitely wasn’t your finest moment 

Raven: he’s had fine moments?

Cyborg: lol

green bean: hey! 

Icy Dead People: I thought Beast Boy saved everyone from the Brotherhood of Evil

Cyborg: yeah but don’t tell him that he’ll get too big of a head 

kentucky fried: he didn’t save me 

kentucky fried: jinx did 

Friend Jinx: and don’t forget it 

kentucky fried: never 

green bean: to be fair Jericho did a lot of the work 

Jericho: but you got everyone together and came up with a coherent plan! everyone was panicking and you got us functioning as a team 

Harold: I was there too 

Catfighter Supreme: yes you were very valuable in making a portal so the rest of us could do the fighting 

Harold: :( 

Bird’s I View: everyone was a valuable part in the battle against BoE 

Icy Dead People: even me? 

Bird’s I View: everyone who was there was a valuable part in the battle against BoE 

kentucky fried: even me?

Bird’s I View: of course you were very valuable in making sure Jinx could be there to help 

Friend Jinx: <3 

kentucky fried: your joking but your not wrong 

Starfire: maybe we can be kind to everyone here and make sure everyone feels valuable? 

Bird’s I View: I already said that. KF can interrupt it how he wants

Bird’s I View: interpret 

Bird’s I View: although interrupt is accurate 

kentucky fried: its more encouraging from Star though 

Bird’s I View: very true 

Cyborg: everything is more encouraging from Star

Starfire : how did Friend Jinx form the heart shape?

Starfire: 3> 

Starfire: >3

Starfire: <3 

Friend Jinx: its a < and a 3 

Friend Jinx: oh you got it nvm 

Starfire: <3 <3 <3 

Starfire name changed to Starfire <3

-

Pawsome: What’s black and white and red all over? 

Starfire <3: oh I know this one! It is a newspaper, correct? 

Pawsome: No

Pawsome: img85748.png

Cyborg: ugh 

Bumblee: yikes 

Starfire <3: oh no! 

Icy Dead People: that sucks 

Bird’s I View: that’s paint, right?

Pawsome: Yeah from the paint themed Akuma yesterday 

Pawsome: The paint coated my joints and kept me from moving but it never touched my ring so I couldn’t cataclysm it 

Pawsome : One of our local blogs, the Ladyblog, posted a bunch of cool pictures of Ladybug, Carapace, Ryuko, and Roi Singe from yesterday but this was the only one she uploaded of me :(

Bird’s I View: the media is like that sometimes 

kentucky fried: gotta be quicker and not get hit 

Icy Dead People: must be fur-strating 

Ladybug: don’t encourage him! 

Rena Rouge: can you blame the Ladyblogger if she was more distracted by Ladybug than the others? 

Ladybug: asdffgghkl 

Rena Rouge: babe? 

Ladybug: sorry dropped my phone 

Icy Dead People : hey Rena

Rena Rouge: what’s up? 

Icy Dead People: rouge means red, right? 

Rena Rouge: yeah. Red foxes are orange, that’s why my name is red and my suit is orange 

Icy Dead People : do you get asked about that a lot? 

Rena Rouge: all the time 

Rena Rouge: img12887.png

Rena Rouge: a red fox for reference

Cyborg: that thing sure is orange 

Pawsome: Orange you glad that you had that photo on hand? 

Ladybug: no

Rena Rouge: lol except I didn’t I literally just googled it 

Pawsome:

Ladybug: chat, no 

Pawsome: Orange you glad that Google exists? 

Rena Rouge: fair enough 

Rena Rouge name changed to Orange You Glad 

Ladybug: stop! encouraging! him! 

green bean: i dont think yellow-ing is helping you 

Ladybug: sorry

Ladybug: it just annoys me when he does it

Ladybug: you could even say that it

Ladybug: bugs me

Pawsome: lol 

green bean: i red what you did there 

Icy Dead People: it really blue us away 



Notes:

I’ve been arguing with myself over whether this series is E or T, so if it changes a bunch, it’s because I have the decision making skill of a squirrel in the middle of the road.

Chapter 5: Chapter 4: The List

Summary:

Ladybug: what about clowns? I know that that’s a thing in Gotham
Cardinal: fortunately, the person you’re thinking of does such a bad job at being both a clown and a joker that I never developed any association between them and him

Notes:

Anyways, this takes inspiration from DC backstories, although since this is clearly a different universe I’m leaving some of it up to artistic license on my part.
Nicknames:
Beast Boy: green bean
Cardinal: Robin
Kid Flash: kentucky fried
Chat Noir: Pawsome
Phantom: Icy Dead People
Rena Rouge: Orange You Glad
Jinx: Friend Jinx

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Argent: hey BB 

green bean: yeah? 

Argent: you can turn into any animal, right? 

green bean: yep 

Argent: including a rat? 

green bean: a rat? all of the animal kingdom and youre asking about a rat? 

Argent: this is going somewhere I promise

green bean: okay then yeah 

Argent: okay have you seen ratatouille 

green bean: yes 

Argent: so have you tried climbing onto your teammates heads and controlling them?

green bean: no they won’t let me 

Raven: I don't want a rodent in my hair 

Cardinal: its a cartoon it won’t work in real life 

Cyborg: I don’t have hair 

Argent: its up to you, Star! 

Cardinal: cardinal? Really KF?

kentucky fried: its! not! me!

Speedy: hey, this is probably a weird ask, but can we not joke about mind control? 

Ladybug: seconded 

Cardinal: yeah that’s fair. Added to the list 

Pawsome: what’s the list? I don’t think I was here when it was made 

Cardinal: it’s a list of topics to avoid or tread carefully around. 

Cardinal: an alarming number of people asked for medical stuff to be put on the list. Makes me concerned for the state of the world of medicine 

Cardinal: no overly pro-government, military, or JL stuff

Aqualad: we are very anti-Green Arrow here 

Ladybug: what about clowns? I know that that’s a thing in Gotham 

Cardinal: fortunately, the person you’re thinking of does such a bad job at being both a clown and a joker that I never developed any association between them and him 

Aqualad: ooh burn 

Icy Dead People: actually since it was brought up I have issues with clowns? 

Cardinal: ah okay added to the list 

Argent: i admit I’ve been curious about the few of you who’ve worked with the JL before. Obviously you don’t anymore, except for KF 

Argent: and like, how’d you end up working with them in the first place? 

Orange You Glad: yeah me too

Cardinal: it’s a long story. For me at least. 

Cardinal: the tldr is that after my parents died I decided by myself to go for revenge. He saw me trying and decided to take me in to train me so I wouldn’t get myself killed. Then a few years later he fires me out of nowhere

kentucky fried: out of nowhere? i heard you got shot

Cardinal: so? 

Raven: what do you mean, so? 

green bean: yeah dude getting shot is a big deal

green bean: ESPECIALLY FOR YOU 

Cyborg: you’re going to turn me gray. And I don’t even have hair

Cardinal: anyways

kentucky fried: so the Flash is a family friend, i idolised him and decided to try to electrocute myself to give me superspeed and somehow it worked 

Icy Dead People: oh hey I got my powers from electrocution too

kentucky fried: oh cool

Argent: how do you get ghost powers from being electrocuted? 

Icy Dead People: well I got electrocuted. and then I died 

Argent: oh

Friend Jinx: makes sense 

Aqualad: I was raised by Aquaman. Then he and his wife had a baby, and I felt ignored, so I started working by myself and met the titans and then Bumbleebee

Friend Jinx: spell bumblebee correctly challenge level: impossible 

Aqualad: apparently 

Speedy: GA took me in after my guardian at the time died, but then he kicked me out

Argent: oof 

Speedy: but i’m with titans east now, so hopefully i’ll never have to deal with him again 

Aqualad: titans east more like ga’s number one hate club 



Notes:

A more serious chapter, but I promise hijinks are coming

Chapter 6: Chapter 5: Sharp As Steel

Summary:

Not a Ninja: do you like pokemon?
Ryuko: no
Not a Ninja: okay then

Notes:

Miraculous Chat:
Ladybug: Lucky Charm
Rena Rouge: Ninetails
Chat Noir: Chat-aclysm
Viperion: major scales
Pegasus: Like A Good Neigh-bor
Roi Singe: Monkey Busness
Titans Chat:
Robin: Pope Robin
Rena Rouge: Orange You Glad
Chat Noir: Pawsome
Kid Flash: kentucky fried

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Team Miraculous 

Lucky Charm: thanks again to everyone with the Akuma today! That was a tough one 

Ninetails: yeah it was! Never would’ve defeated it without you LB

Chat-aclysm: Yeah good work team! Glad you all were there while I was frozen the entire time. Again. 

Lucky Charm: you distracted the akuma while I got the miraculouses, that was very helpful. 

major scales: glad it worked out but that was one exhausting loop for me 

Lucky Charm: make sure you get some good rest Viperion

major scales: i am already called in sick to work 

Lucky Charm: good 

Lucky Charm: btw how would you all feel about adding Queen Bee to the chat? She did do a good job today but she needs to learn to work as a team. This might be a good chance for her learn while still letting me kick her out if she’s too mean to you guys 

Ryuko: if she’s part of the team she should be in the chat 

major scales: agreed

Like A Good Neigh-bor: if I understand the situation correctly, a lot of her bad behavior comes from her parents. Giving her a space to interact with us without that pressure might be good. However, she is known to be Chloe and this might pose a security risk to the chat if someone took advantage of that.

Lucky Charm: all good points

Lucky Charm: also Roi Singe Ryoku I’m swinging back around to pick up your miraculouses. Tikki just gave me the go ahead to transform 

Ryuko: understood. I’m in the same place you found me before 

monkey busness: im at my apartment ill tell xuppu your on your way 

Chat-aclysm: Ryoku we have got to find you a nickname for this chat. You are the only one without one. 

Ryuko: I am not creative enough to come up with one, and the only ones that have been suggested are Mulan references. 

Ninetails: hmm. sounds like a fun challenge 

Not a Ninja: do you like pokemon? 

Ryuko: no

Not a Ninja: okay then 

Ninetails: what about Sharp as Steel? 

Ryuko name changed to Sharp as Steel 

Sharp as Steel: I like it 

Sharp as Steel: Ladybug is here to collect my miraculous, I must go 


Titans General Chat

Pope Robin: hey team miraculous you guys okay? That Akuma looked rough

Orange You Glad: yeah we’re fine! LB just had to work out those creative muscles a bit more than normal 

Ladybug: “a bit” 

Ladybug: easily the hardest Akuma battle since Hero’s Day 

Orange You Glad: oh don’t remind me. Hero’s Day was a disaster 

Pawsome: I thought it went pretty good, all things considered

Starfire: why is your screen name Pope Robin, please?

Pope Robin: I’m assuming it’s cause I was Cardinal earlier

Starfire: I see. Cardinal is a type of bird associated with red, like a robin, but it also a religious position, like a pope? It is a play on words, then? 

Pope Robin: yeah pretty much

Icy Dead People: I didn’t know you were cathlotuc

Icy Dead People: cathlotic 

Icy Dead People: catholic 

Pope Robin: I’m none of those things

Starfire: that is because it is a pun 

Icy Dead People: I know lol 

Icy Dead People: oh happy Friday the thritwenth 

Ice Dead People: thirteenth 

Icy Dead People: skulker broke my phone it’s making it hard to type 

kentucky fried: oh mood i hate when villains break my phone 

Orange You Glad: Ladybug’s cure fixes my phone for me 

kentucky fried: yeah yeah rub it in



Notes:

Starting a new job on Monday, wish me luck!

Chapter 7: Chapter 6: Cookout

Summary:

Argent: not so much cool as cold
Kole: it’s not that bad! Plus we’re right next to the ocean which is amazing
Argent: you grew up in the literal North Pole I don’t think you get an opinion

Notes:

Herald - Harold
Robin - Cathlotuc Birb
Phantom - Icy Dead People
Beast Boy - green bean
Chat Noir - Pawsome
Bumblebee - Bumblee
Jinx - Friend Jinx

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Cyborg: Tomorrow is Father’s Day, and I know a lot of us here have rough relationships with our parents, so I have Robin’s permission to invite all of you over for a cookout tomorrow. 12 noon California time.

Harold: cool. I’ll be over so I can make get people back if a villain pops up

Jericho: will there be vegetarian options?

Cathlotuc Birb: yeah BB is vegetarian 

Icy Dead People: hey I had serious reason to be making tupies 

Icy Dead People: *typos 

green bean: tupies

Pawsome: Tupies

Icy Dead People: shush  

Cathlotuc Birb: I didn’t choose this name. KF changed it on me again 

Aqualad: you had me at cookout 

Bumblee: same here

Bumblee : the twins will be coming as well 

Speedy: and me

Pawsome: I’ll have to check with LB first but I’m interested 

Ladybug: yeah you’re good I have civilian plans that day 

Red Star: It is not Father’s Day for us, but I’ll also be there if we don’t have a villain attack. 

Argent: same

Kole: same. But Gnarrk will not be 

Cyborg: tell him we’ll miss him! 

Kole: I will! 

Ladybug: Redstar where are you that you don’t celebrate Father’s Day tomorrow? France celebrates at the same time as the US and I thought a bunch of other countries did too

Red Star: I am from Russia but right now Titans North is stationed in Denmark

Ladybug: oh cool

Argent: not so much cool as cold 

Kole: it’s not that bad! Plus we’re right next to the ocean which is amazing

Argent: you grew up in the literal North Pole I don’t think you get an opinion 

Cathlotuc Birb: actually Kole’s home in the NP was really nice

green bean: yeah it was lovely much better than russia 

green bean: no offense red star 

Red Star: None taken. We all saw how much you were struggling when in Russia 

green bean: yeah that was a little embarrassing 

Ladybug: but if you can shapeshift why not just be a polar bear or something? 

green bean: unfortunately none of the other titans speak bear 

Friend Jinx: Kole lived in the North Pole? Like Santa? 

Kole: yep

Kole name changed to Secret Santa

Friend Jinx: also cookout tomorrow sounds fun 

Friend Jinx: sorry just got back from dealing with Capt Cold and catching up on the chat

green bean: has anyone heard from Raven? shes passed up on many chances to make fun of me and im starting to worry

Cathlotuc Birb: she and Starfire disappeared into her room an hour ago, they’re probably fine

green bean: what do they even do in their? 

Cathlotuc Birb: idk, meditate? Summon spirits? Whatever girls do 

Friend Jinx: can confirm girls do that type of thing 

Secret Santa: I want to hang out with girls and summon spirits 

Friend Jinx: we can totally do that some time this week 

Icy Dead People: just be careful what you summon because I might have to deal with them

Notes:

Happy Father’s Day to those who celebrate tomorrow!

Chapter 8: Chapter 7: What's in a Name?

Summary:

Raven: the trifecta of bad-joke makers all agree
Pawsome: Ooh I’ve always wanted to be part of a trifecta

Notes:

Nicknames:
Kid Flash: kentucky fried/windows no longer supports
Robin: Bird is the Word/Mom Friend
Beast Boy: green bean/asparagus
Phantom: Icy Dead People
Chat Noir: Pawsome
Jinx: Friend Jinx/Pink Hair and Pronouns
Rena Rouge: Orange You Glad
Cyborg: One Man Geek Squad
Raven: Attempted Murder

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titan General Chat

Speedy: it finally happened. Someone confused me with Kid Flash 

kentucky fried: that’s why I keep asking you to change! your! name! 

Speedy: ugh yeah 

Speedy: speedy was GA’s name for me anyways 

Bird is the Word: ew 

Speedy: exactly 

Speedy: I’m just not creative enough to come up with anything 

Ladybug: what about Robin Hood? He was a famous archer

Speedy: then I’d just get confused with Robin

Ladybug: yeah I realized that after I sent it

green bean: bird names are in 

Icy Dead People: yeah you could be sparrow 

Pawsome: Purrfect 

Speedy: cute but no 

Speedy named changed to Sparrow

Sparrow: ???

Bird is the Word: KF isn’t the only one with name changing powers

kentucky fried: dude its not me i swear

Pawsome: Color names are popular now. You could be, like, Red Arrow

Pawsome: No wait we don’t want to sound like GA. Red Bow?

Sparrow: better but still too close to GA

Starfire: what about quiver? 

Sparrow: like I’m quivering in my boots? No thanks

Starfire: ah yes. People on Earth do like their plays on words 

Icy Dead People: are puns not a thing in your home?

Starfire: no they are not. I do not understand why, as once I grasped the purpose of these play on words I do find them humorous 

green bean: hey raven star said im funny

Raven: no, she said she finds clever play on words funny. She said nothing about your jokes

Starfire: Beast Boy is occasionally funny, yes

Pawsome: Occasionally? Even LB gives me more than that

Ladybug: when?????

kentucky fried: ohhh sparrow because its sp arrow

Sparrow: yeah? Are you just getting that?

kentucky fried: look im still recoverig from fathers day 

Friend Jinx: I told you to cancel and come to the cookout with me

kentucky fried: if you need a name how about slowy? 

Sparrow: how about no 

kentucky fried: teenage human archery turtle?

Sparrow: don’t make me come fight you 

kentucky fried: you think youd win? lmaooooooo 

Ladybug: what about bowstring? 

Sparrow: not quite feeling it but its my favorite so far 

Icy Dead People: I was going to talk with some friends later about hero tech stuff and my friend S is pretty creative. I could ask her? 

Sparrow: sure thanks 

Bird is the Word: yeah Phantom I’ve been wondering how much support you have in Amity. I know Red Huntress is active but she doesn’t seem completely dependable yet.

Icy Dead People: RH will come through when we need her but she’s still pretty anti-ghost. I have multiple civilians and a few ghosts that help me.

Bird is the Word: good

Raven: yeah Robin’s been on a big “no titan by themselves” kick since BoE

Sparrow: completely understandable. The twins have been inseparable since too 

green bean: okay here me out: you could just go by Bow. then when you face your opponents you can go “bow before me”

green bean: wait a moment 

Cyborg: honestly I’ve been feeling the separation anxiety since BoE too 

green bean: okay ive got it. you could go by Bow and then say youve got a present wrapped in a bow when you shoot someone 

Sparrow: or I could not 

Orange You Glad: what about Crossbow? I’ve seen you use them before and it sounds more dangerous than just bow or bowstring 

Icy Dead People: I kinda like BB’s idea 

Pawsome: Me too

Raven: the trifecta of bad-joke makers all agree

Pawsome: Ooh I’ve always wanted to be part of a trifecta 

Icy Dead People: sweet we’re trifecta buddies! 

green bean: trifecta buddies! 

Raven: I may have regrets

Argent: what about Bullseye? 

Sparrow: finallysomegoodfood.png 

Bird is the Word: doesn’t that imply that you’re the target? 

Sparrow: and you’ve ruined it


Dick and his Del-tones

Pink Hair and Pronouns: speaking of names, I have to come up with a new civilian name

One Man Geek Squad: Lucille? I know you used to go by Lucky 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: no specifically because I want to leave “Lucky” far behind 

Mom Friend: would you want it to start with a J? Jenna, Jasmine, Janice, Joyce

Asparagus: why do all your name suggestions sound like old woman? 

Mom Friend: well what would you suggest? 

Asparagus: cat

Pink Hair and Pronouns: like the animal? 

windows no longer supports: aunt iris knows a cat 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: like, she knows an animal cat? 

windows no longer supports: no she works with a human named Cat

Attempted Murder: I assume you need a first, middle, and a last?

Pink Hair and Pronouns: yep 

Attempted Murder: what about Morgan A. Chance?

Mom Friend: ooh 

One Man Geek Squad: nice 

windows no longer supports: that’s a good one 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: that’s perfect thx Raven 



Notes:

(Dick Dale and his Del-tones is like an old surfer style band or something)

Chapter 9: Chapter 8: Gotta Catch Them All

Summary:

Friend Jinx: wow you’re all a bunch of nerds
kentucky fried: youre surprised?
Friend Jinx: not really

Notes:

Nicknames:
Phantom: Icy Dead People/Phantastic
Sam: Doom Queen
Tucker: King Tut
Jazz: All That Jazz
Robin: Taillow
Jinx: Friend Jinx
Kid Flash: kentucky fried
Hotspot: Hot n Cold
Speedy: Sparrow
Beast Boy: green bean
Bumblebee: Bumblee
Rena Rouge: Orange You Glad
Chat Noir: Pawsome

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Team Phantom 

Doom Queen: mom finally gave me my phone back what’d I miss?

Phantastic: not much honestly 

Phantastic: Skulker came after me again on Monday but we dealt with him easily 

King Tut: we went to the movies yesterday and managed to finish an entire movie this time 

Doom Queen: sounds suspicious 

Phantastic: idk I think the heatwave is keeping the ghosts away. It’s pretty brutal out here 

Doom Queen: you better be hydrating

Phantastic: I am I am I swear!

All That Jazz: hi Sam! How’s your family vacation going?

Doom Queen: it sucks. Star City has so many interesting locations but my parents refuse to go to any of them! And none of the restaurants they’re dragging me to have good vegan options 

All That Jazz: I’m sorry to hear that. Fortunately you’re almost done, and you’ll be back in Amity before you know it

Doom Queen: ugh I also hate how they always talk about boring topics and mind-numbing gossip but then get mad when I’m on my phone instead of talking to them. Like, I would talk to you if I thought you had anything interesting to say! 

Phantastic: tell me about it 

All That Jazz: just hold on a bit longer, you’ll be home soon! 

Phantastic: oh btw if you see Green Arrow anywhere please give him some trouble apparently he’s a huge POS

Doom Queen: I do love giving old white men trouble 

All That Jazz: what did GA do? 

Phantastic: well you didn’t hear this from me, but he kicked Speedy out 

King Tut: wait isn’t Speedy Flash’s sidekick?

Phantastic: no that’s Kid Flash 

King Tut: wait for real? Why is GA’s sidekick called speedy? Isn’t he just another archer? 

Phantastic: I don’t know and I don’t think he’d appreciate me asking 

Doom Queen: he needs a better name. Like Robin Hood 

King Tut: but there’s already a Robin Hood inspired hero? 

Doom Queen: true 

Doom Queen: bullseye? 

Phantastic: wait is Robin’s name inspired by Robin Hood?

King Tut: yes? At least I’ve always assumed so 

Phantastic: huh

Doom Queen: that doesn’t make sense either Robin’s not an archer or a thief 

Phantastic: brb I’m going to go ask him 


Titans General Chat 

Icy Dead People: hey Robin are you on rn? 

Taillow: yeah what’s up? 

Ladybug: oh are we doing Pokemon names now?

Ladybug name changed to Ledyba

Raven changed name to Murkrow 

Aqualad changed name to Tentacool 

Friend Jinx: wow you’re all a bunch of nerds 

Hot n Cold changed name to Scorbunny 

kentucky fried: youre surprised?

Friend Jinx: not really 

Icy Dead People: are you named after Robin Hood? 

Icy Dead People changed name to Phantump 

Taillow: no lol but I get that a lot 

Cyborg changed name to Klang 

Jericho changed name to Drowzee 

kentucky fried: wow an entire list of superheroes choosing pokemon and none of you choose fighting type 

green bean changed name to monferno 

kentucky fried: well it doesnt count after i said something 

Starfire changed name to Throh 

Taillow: the tldr version is I like high places and pre-hero people compared me to perching birds like robins

Phantump: oh cool 

Sparrow: I appreciate you being the only “sidekick” to use your own name and not something your mentor choose or a variant of their name

Throh: can confirm that Robin is very much like the birds on this Earth 

Bumblee: but you can’t actually fly, right? 

Taillow: unfortunately no 

kentucky fried: wait non-powered titans if you could have any power what would it be? 

Ledyba: flight

Sparrow: but you do have powers?

Ledyba: I have magical jewelry that gives me powers, but if I personally had powers, it would be flying 

Orange You Glad: I think I would like superspeed 

Pawsome: Superspeed probably 

Orange You Glad: oh twinsies! 

Sparrow: I’d some invulnerability actually 

Tentacool: you’d do what to some invulnerability? 

Sparrow: I’d like some and also shut up 

Throh: I would like it if Robin had some invulnerability 

Klang: me too 

monferno: yeah seriously 

Murkrow: that would be nice 

Taillow: invulnerability would just slow me down 

monferno: dude

Murkrow: if I ever go gray it’s your fault 



Notes:

Had a fun time looking up all those pokemon!

Chapter 10: Chapter 9: Punday Monday on a Sunday

Summary:

Phantump: you know the punchline to every joke or something?
Pipikek: I grew up dealing with Gotham villains

Notes:

A shorter chapter, but life’s been busy.
Pawsome: Chat Noir
monferno: Beast Boy
Murkrow: Raven
Pipikek: Robin
Throh: Starfire
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Phantump: Phantom
Klang: Cyborg
Catfighter Supreme: Panthera
Drowzee: Jericho
Sparrow: Speedy
Ledyba: Ladybug
Tentacool: Aqualad
Harold: Herald

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Pawsome: Happy Punday Monday! What’s the difference between a piano, tuna, and a stick of glue? 

monferno: ?????? i woudlve sworn that today was sunday 

Murkrow: that’s because it is 

Pipikek: Paris is like nine hours ahead of Jump. 

Pipikek: also you can tuna piano but you can’t piano a tuna 

Throh: very creative! 

Pawsome: Is there really such a big difference in time between us? I had no idea

kentucky fried: wait what about the glue

Pawsome: I knew you’d get stuck on that

kentucky fried: lol

Throh: because glue is sticky, correct? 

Pawsome: Exactly 

Phantump: it’s still sunday here but I have a pun for you: when does a joke become a dad joke?

Pipikek: when the punchline becomes apparent? 

Phantump: you know the punchline to every joke or something?

Pipikek: I grew up dealing with Gotham villains 

Phantump: oh right

Throh: please I do not get the joke

Klang: say “apparent” out loud

Throh: oh I see! A dad is a parent! 

Catfighter Supreme: hey just a heads up those of us not familiar with pokemon are having a hard time remembering who’s who

Red Star: experiencing the same issue here 

Pipikek: that’s fair, let’s all change it back 

Pipikek name changed to Red Robin. Yum. 

Throh name changed to Starfire 

monferno name changed to green bean 

Murkrow name changed to Attempted Murder 

Phantump name changed to Icy Dead People

Red Robin. Yum.: I’ll remind Titans East when they get back on 

Sparrow: I’m on I’ll remind Aqualad 

Klang name changed to Cy’s Your Guy 

Drowzee changed name to Luting in the Streets

Pawsome:  Jericho you play the lute?

Luting in the Streets: a little 

Pawsome: Awesome

Ledyba name changed to Bug Lady 

Luting in the Streets: playing music helps me meditate 

Bug Lady: you and Viperion would get along well I think 

Pawsome: Oh totally  

Tentacool name changed to Giant Squid 

Giant Squid: who wants to help me chase down Speedy for waking me up to change my name in the chat  

kentucky fried: on my way 

Harold: you need an escape, Speedy? 

Sparrow: yes please 



Notes:

Until next time!

Chapter 11: Chapter 10: hahahaha oops

Summary:

Lucky Charm: you would never believe what I just did
Chat-aclysm: drop your phone?
Ninetails: drop your phone?
Not a Ninja: drop your phone?
Sharp as Steel: Did you drop your phone again?

Notes:

Nicknames:
Ninetails: Rena Rouge
Like a Good Neigh-bor: Pegasus
Lucky Charm: Ladybug
Sharp as Steel: Ryuko
Chat-aclsym: Chat Noir
Not a Ninja: Carapace
major scales: Viperion
monkey busness: Roi Singe

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Team Miraculous

Ninetails: heads up the Ladyblogger has given tomorrow an Akuma rating of 9

Like A Good Neigh-bor: how do you know? Neither the Ladyblog nor her Twitter page has updated yet

Lucky Charm: we ran into the Ladyblogger at the Akuma today and she let us know 

Ninetails: yeah exactly 

Sharp as Steel: Was she able to record any of the fight?

Lucky Charm: unfortunTfggcz

Chat-aclysm: ladybug?

Ninetails: babe? 

Lucky Charm: you would never believe what I just did 

Chat-aclysm: drop your phone?

Ninetails: drop your phone?

Not a Ninja: drop your phone?

Sharp as Steel: Did you drop your phone again? 

monkey busness: did mnow one else see rena call lb babe? 

Not a Ninja: they’ve been dating for like a month my dude 

monkey busness:

Sharp as Steel: I also did not know. Congratulations. 

major scales: whats up with akuma rating? did she say? 

Ninetails: something about another game show filming 

Chat-aclysm: Why do we even let game shows film in Paris anymore?

Ninetails: I guess people still need jobs or something 

Like A Good Neigh-bor: I just looked it up. They’ll be at the Eiffel Tower tomorrow, which is one of the highest Akuma hotspots. Fortunately, tomorrow is not a high-traffic day for tourists. This will be the only episode this particular game show will be having in Paris.

Lucky Charms: thanks Pegasus


Rena Rouge started a chat

Rena Rouge added Ladybug and Carapace into the chat 

Rena Rouge: hahahaha oops 

Rena Rouge: anyways thanks for the save babe 

Carapace: maybe it’s time for another picture of the two of you together?

Rena Rouge: my and lb? 

Rena Rouge: *me 

Ladybug: I think he means civilian you and RR 

Ladybug: I wouldn’t overthink it. Alya and RR have been seen in the same place enough times it’s not suspicious that you’d be able to talk to you 

Ladybug: although I’m not against another picture if you can make it seem like you took it at the Akuma earlier 

Carapace: hey LB Rena knows your civilian identity, right? She can do the same for you if you want 

Ladybug: good point. But civilian me doesn’t have as good of a reason to be near akumas as the Ladyblogger herself does 

Rena Rouge: I’m sure we can think of something 



Notes:

Sorry for the lack of updates! New job and new schedule = new lack of energy

Chapter 12: Chapter 11: Independence Day Eve

Summary:

Cy’s Your Guy: and you’re okay?
Argent: no but for reasons completely unrelated

Notes:

Nicknames:
Robin Egg Blue: Robin
Harold: Herald
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
green bean: Beast Boy
Bumblee: Bumblebee
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Friend Jinx: Jinx
Catfighter Supreme: Panthera
Icy Dead People: Phantom
Secret Santa: Kole
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Attempted Murder: Raven

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat 

Robin Egg Blue: heads up, Fourth of July is tomorrow. We all probably have different feelings about this day, but the Jump City fireworks show is amazing and we can see it from the top of our tower if anyone wants to come 

Harold: I’m free to play taxi again 

Starfire: fireworks are beautiful! I am always excited to see them! 

kentucky fried: im being deagged to something with my parenfs 

green bean: you’re being deaged? 

kentucky fried: dragged 

Bumblee: heads up we just got visited by Control Freak and it sounds like he might pay the other titans a visit 

Argent: I’d like to see him try. We are being overrun by evil snowmen

Cy’s Your Guy: big oof

Cy’s Your Guy: also I will be cooking for tomorrow 

Friend Jinx: sorry babe I’m cancelling on you I love Cy’s cooking 

kentucky fried: fair 

Bumblee: Titan’s East will be there so you better cook a lot 

Catfighter Supreme: control freak? lol 

Catfighter Supreme: he will pose no threat to us 

Icy Dead People: 4th of july is always crazy in amity so im not expecting ill make it 

Robin Egg Blue: do you need any extra help Phantom? 

Icy Dead People: no im good but thanks 

Red Star: I have no inclination to celebrate an American holiday but Cyborg’s cooking does sound good 

Cy’s Your Guy: it makes me happy to be able to feed people 

Argent: youre so dad-coded sometimes

Cy’s Your Guy: sorry what? 

Robin Egg Blue: Titans West and Team Miraculous? 

Bumblee: is Titans West even on here? I haven’t heard from them 

Bushido: I’m usually training, Lightning and Thunder keep breaking their devices, and the kids are too young to be on the chat 

Starfire: Bushido! Hi! 

Bushido: hello Starfire 

Bushido: I do think Red Star is right. I dislike celebrating American holidays, but Cyborg’s cooking is not to be missed 

Giant Squid: I just googled it and I think the French team is a little busy 

Giant Squid: img127777.png 

Argent: as much as I complain about our snowmen I am glad that I don’t deal with akumas 

Secret Santa: the snowmen aren’t that bad as long as you don’t let them eat you 

Cy’s Your Guy: excuse me? 

Secret Santa: Gnarrk wants food but I don’t think he’d like fireworks 

Cy’s Your Guy: that’s fine you guys can leave before the firework show if you want. Can we get back to the snowmen eating you? 

Secret Santa: it’s not a big deal I just turn crystal and they can’t stomach me 

Cy’s Your Guy: what about the other members of your team? 

Argent: well Red Star is radioactive so they don’t try to eat him, and Gnarrk is hard to catch, so I’m the one who keeps getting eaten 

Cy’s Your Guy: and you’re okay? 

Argent: no but for reasons completely unrelated 

Hot n Cold: quick question: do your snowmen melt? 

Red Star: no

Argent: no

Secret Santa: no 

Robin Egg Blue: they do not, or I would’ve mentioned it to you earlier 

Icy Dead People: if you need someone who can handle the cold and not get eaten, I could always visit 

Icy Dead People: heard the stars are beautiful up where you’re all at 

Red Star: they are. I’ll let you help if you let someone help you tomorrow 

Icy Dead People:

Icy Dead People:  okay fair 

kentucky fried: i volunteer i need an excuse not to be at my parents tomorrow and flash abandoned me for a jl mission 

Attempted Murder: ngl I would love a chance to learn more about ghosts and the ghost zone 

Icy Dead People: I mean sure. I’d love to talk about ghosts to someone who doesn’t hate them just for being ghosts and I’m always up for providing an excuse to not be with your parents 

kentucky fried: thanks dude 

Attempted Murder: I’ll see you then



Notes:

Don’t forget to leave out cookies and milk for Captain America tonight!

Chapter 13: Chapter 12: untitled-doc-(1)-(1)-(2)

Summary:

Phantom: have you ever broken a bone and needed a cast
Raven: I have healing magic so no

Notes:

Just a short little chapter to follow up yesterday’s.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Phantom created Fourth of July chat 

Phantom added Raven and Kid Flash 

Kid Flash name changed to kfc 

Phantom: alright I asked my friend T to help with this but this is the basics on who’s going to be causing problems today 

Phantom: untitled-doc-(1)-(1)-(2).doc 

Raven: I’m going to hack into your computer system and changed your document names I swear 

kfc: ooh that thermos design is nice 

kfc: ive been studying ecology but i havent gotten a chance to see designs this advanced 

kfc: although that battery design can probably be improved on. if your up to looking at it 

Phantom: yeah sure 

kfc: fenton-thermos-design1.doc 

Phantom: wow you did that fast

kfc: suurspeed 

kfc: *superspeed 

Phantom: so your speed doesn’t just speed your body up, but also your mind? 

kfc: yep

Phantom: cool 

kfc: i think so 

Raven: do you know how being in a thermos affects the ghost? 

Phantom: unfortunately 

Raven: what was it like

Phantom: have you ever broken a bone and needed a cast 

Raven: I have healing magic so no 

Phantom: oh sweet 

Phantom: well that’s what I always think of being in the thermos as 

Phantom: it’s kinda itchy, and there’s no way to scratch it, and it’s kinda sweaty, and it’s mean to put someone in one if they don’t need it, but putting someone in one that will otherwise be hurt or hurt others for a brief time is fine 

kfc: yeah thats about what a cast feels like 

Raven: didn’t you say you had speed healing?

kfc: i do but i still need a cast sometimes if the injury takes more than a few hours to heal 

kfc: plus if any of my civilian classmates hear about it 

kfc: once a civilian classmate got suspicious so i pretended to break my leg and wore a cast for six weeks as a civilian while being active as kid flash 

Phantom: did that work? 

kfc: it did but i still stand by that it was unnecessary 

Raven: then why’d you do it?

kfc: it was robin’s idea 

Raven: ofc it was 

kfc: anyways @phantom where do you want us to meet you? 

Phantom: at the park. I know Raven’s been there she can show you 

kfc: cool be there in like five 



Notes:

Be safe with any explosives please! Lets not burn down anything and not completely ruin the air quality for tomorrow.

Chapter 14: Chapter 13: Story Time With Beast Boy 1

Summary:

Attempted Murder: oh gods I remember this
green bean: shush im telling a story

Notes:

Nicknames:
green bean: Beast Boy
Attempted Murder: Raven
Robin a Bank: Robin
Catfighter Supreme: Panthera
Giant Squid: Aqualad

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

green bean: so i just randomly remembered this time that no one on the team was paying attention to me 

green bean: so i got all sad and started moping around jump city 

green bean: i was trying to impress these random girls i saw 

green bean: so i turned into a dog

Attempted Murder: oh gods I remember this

green bean: shush im telling a story 

green bean: anyways, completely unknownst to me, at that particular moment in time there was a different green dog that was actually an alien 

Bug Lady: oh no

Robin a Bank: unknownst? 

green bean: and it had this… master? pet? i still dont know what was going on with them but the other alien was sad that the dog left 

green bean: so i got kidnapped because he mistook me for the other green dog 

green bean: i tried to reason with him but it wasnt working and the alien just tried to leave with me on his ship?

green bean: the other titans finally showed up and were enough of a distraction i could sneak out 

green bean: and then the other green dog showed up and renegotiated things and the two of them just left? 

green bean: anyways that was easily in my top ten of weirdest days of my life 

Catfighter Supreme: wtf 

Giant Squid: only top ten? 

green bean: ive had a weird life dude



Notes:

Hope y’all have a good week

Chapter 15: Chapter 14: Training Day

Summary:

green bean: yeah no one is evil on thrusdays
Attempted Murder: thrusdays?

Notes:

Heads up there is a link in here I do not know what it goes to irl so don’t click it
Nicknames:
Bumblee: Bumblebee
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Attempted Murder: Raven
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Nest Egg: Robin
Friend Jinx: Jinx
Harold: Herald
Orange You Glad: Rena Rouge
green bean: Beast Boy

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titan General Chat

Bumblee: hey y’all, not-speedy just installed some killer training equipment here at Titans East Tower if anyone wants to come try it out

Giant Squid: it’s not literally killing anyone just fyi 

Cy’s Your Guy: ooooh I love training equipment 

Cy’s Your Guy: please tell me you have a new obstacle course those are my favorites 

Attempted Murder: Cyborg does love his obstacle courses

Bumblee: we have two. One for flying and one for the rest of you 

Argent: a flying based one does sound fun 

Bug Lady: that sounds great! I’ve never used real training gear before 

Red Star: the lack of training Team Miraculous has concerns me

Nest Egg: yeah same 

Bumblee: well if you want to bring the rest of your team down the course is open to everyone but Jinx

Starfire: wait why is our friend Jinx excluded?

Friend Jinx: I might have a record of destroying every training simulation and obstacle course I’ve been on

Friend Jinx: still I might come and judge everyone 

Giant Squid: bring snacks 

Friend Jinx: I will if KF doesn’t eat them all before we arrive 

Cy’s Your Guy: well if this is going to be An Event then I will bring stuff to cookout 

Giant Squid: we should do a pot-luck 

Attempted Murder: why? Can’t we just let Cyborg cook? His food is the best anyways 

Cy’s Your Guy: awww thanks Ray 

Giant Squid: I mean yeah but I can’t be the only one that feels weird that it’s always Cyborg bringing the food 

Cy’s Your Guy: but I like being the one bringing the food 

Red Star: it could be nice to have some non-American food for once 

Bug Lady: fair point. I can bring some pastries from a local bakery for something more European 

Bushido: then I’ll provide the Asian food 

Bug Lady: you better not be acting like sushi is the be all end all of Asian food 

Bushido: but you literally just called Parisian pastries European? 

Bug Lady: yes but I’m Parisian but not Japanese so 

Bushido: ahh I see 

Harold: what part of Asia is your family from? I can probably pick up something from there for you 

Bug Lady: Shanghai

Bug Lady: okay I at least have Ryuko and Roi Singe interested in the training. What day works best? 

Nest Egg: historically Thursdays are best

green bean: yeah no one is evil on thrusdays 

Attempted Murder: thrusdays?

Orange You Glad: yeah the stats say akumas are less likely on Thursday. I guess people hate Mondays, hump day is exhausting, and on Fridays and the weekends people get up to Akuma-causing trouble 

Orange You Glad: ladyblog.com/akumastats  

Red Star: evil snowmen are a problem every day of the week 

Red Star: but we will still try to come on Thursday 

Secret Santa: I will bring pie 

Bumblee: ooh yum 



Notes:

Until next time!

Chapter 16: Chapter 15: Tomato/Tomato, Bullet/Bulette

Summary:

Giant Squid: oh come on Roi was a lot of fun
Bug Lady: he tried to out swim a shark
Giant Squid: it was a friendly shark

Notes:

Nicknames:
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Sparrow: Speedy
Attempted Murder: Raven
Pawsome: Chat Noir
Angry Bird: Robin
green bean: Beast Boy
Luting in the Streets: Jericho
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Orange You Glad: Rena Rouge
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Friend Jinx: Jinx

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Cy’s Your Guy: 10 photos 

Cy’s Your Guy: from our zoo trip yesterday 

Giant Squid: ooh that looks like fun 

Sparrow: nice 

Starfire: it was much fun! Beast Boy is especially knowledgeable about the animals on this planet 

Attempted Murder: yeah it’s weird when Beast Boy actually acts intelligently 

Pawsome: BB you can’t act intelligent you’re ruining our brand

green bean: sorry i just like animals 

Luting in the Streets: bb is actually very intelligent? 

Attempted Murder: being intelligent and acting intelligent are two very different things 

Angry Bird: I saw BB struggle to open a door for five minutes once 

Sparrow: pushing a pull door or vice versa?

Angry Bird: no 

Angry Bird: he forgot to unlock it 

green bean: look 

green bean: actually no i dont have an excuse i was just having a moment 

Bug Lady: I’ve done that 

Bug Lady: tbf I was running on fifteen minutes of sleep 

Pawsome: fifteen minutes? 

Bug Lady: blame the akumas 

Bushido: Ladybug, hello. You still haven’t added Ryuko and Roi Singe 

Bug Lady: I’m not sure if I’m ready for Roi Singe to meet BB and Phantom but I can add Ryuko 

Giant Squid: oh come on Roi was a lot of fun 

Bug Lady: he tried to out swim a shark 

Giant Squid: it was a friendly shark

Orange You Glad: you should add Carapace too. He has seniority over the others

Bug Lady: true. And I can trust him to behave himself 

Orange You Glad: I wouldn’t go that far 

Carapace, Ryuko, and Roi Singe have been added to the chat 

Carapace: oh sweet 

Ryuko: hello all 

Ryuko name changed to Sharp as Steel

Bug Lady: Roi Singe is at an event right now I don’t think he has his phone 

Carapace: dude is always busy. Last few akumas both of us were at he arrived soaking wet 

Carapace: really hoping he’s on a swim team or something 

Bug Lady: luckily there are not a lot of sharks in Paris 

Pawsome: save for that one time with the Akuma 

Bug Lady: oh yeah that was a fun one 

green bean: was that the one that flooded paris 

Bug Lady: no it was a foreigner who felt like a fish out of water so he changed people into fish out of water 

Giant Squid: as a literal fish out of water I can understand the urge 

Pawsome: actually I was talking about that aquarium employee

Bug Lady: ohhhh that one 

Bug Lady: that was less fun. 

Carapace: technically those were bulettes 

kentucky fried: like the dnd monster?

Carapace: yeah 

Friend Jinx: nerds 

Bug Lady: no bulettes have armor and legs. These were flying sharks 

kentucky fried: yeah you cant just call any landshark a bullet 

Carapace: … because it’s spelled bulette?

Orange You Glad: babe you have no right to be criticizing other peoples spelling, you know that, right? 

Friend Jinx: babe? I thought yoi were dating Ladybug? 

Orange You Glad: lol I am. Carapace and I used to date before that, before I realized I was gay. We parted on good terms so I guess I never thought to stop calling him babe 

Bug Lady: anyways babes and not babes we’ve gotta go. Akuma @ Eiffel Tower 

Sharp as Steel: will you need all of us, Ladybug?

Orange You Glad: you near a window, Ry? 

Sharp as Steel: yes and now I’m assuming a yes 

Cy’s Your Guy: best of luck Team Miraculous! 



Notes:

Well this was supposed to be more about the zoo visit but it got away from me a little. Oops.

Chapter 17: Chapter 16: Not Thinking Straight

Summary:

Bumblee: I think he’s just tired and not thinking straight
Giant Squid: well I don’t do “straight” so
Attempted Murder: understandable

Notes:

Oof got behind on replying to comments but I appreciate every one of them!
Nicknames:
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
green bean: Beast Boy
Sparrow: Speedy
Icy Dead People: Phantom
Bumblee: Bumblebee
Ribbon: Robin
Attempted Murder: Raven
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Friend Jinx: Jinx

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Giant Squid: back from that fun trip. What were we talking about?

Cy’s Your Guy: we weren’t? 

green bean: dude the chats been quiet all day 

Giant Squid: were we not having a discussion before Triton appeared? 

Cy’s Your Guy: no

Giant Squid: huh 

Giant Squid: I would’ve sworn we were talking about something important 

Sparrow: you weren’t even awake before we left though? 

Giant Squid: I wasn’t? 

Sparrow: nope. You were dead asleep. Missed Bumblebee’s alert so I had to go and wake you. Literally had to pull you out of your bed before you’d wake up 

Giant Squid: so I was asleep? And dreaming? And what I was dreaming of was this chat? 

Cy’s Your Guy: apparently 

Giant Squid: weird 

Icy Dead People: do you usually have such vivid dreams?

Giant Squid: I’ve never had any dream that I thought was real before 

Bumblee: in Aqualad’s defense, we had a really weird day before he went to sleep 

Bumblee: I know the twins were having some weird dreams when I woke them up

green bean: ive had some weird dreams after missions 

Sparrow: I mean, me too, but I never thought they were real?

Giant Squid: but it wasn’t a weird dream, it was just vivid 

Giant Squid: I could’ve sworn that we were talking about something important 

Ribbon: important? In this chat? 

Giant Squid: fair enough 

Attempted Murder: there are certain substances that can make dreams feel more lifelike 

Bumblee: I think he’s just tired and not thinking straight 

Giant Squid: well I don’t do “straight” so 

Attempted Murder: understandable 

Ribbon: sounds like Aqualad should be going back to bed? 

kentucky fried: hypocrite 

Attempted Murder: hypocrite 

green bean: hypocxeure 

Cy’s Your Guys: and this is coming from you? 

Friend Jinx: lol

Ribbon: bb you alright? 

green bean: yeah im just textung and okaying video games 

Cy’s Your Guy: okaying?

Attempted Murder: okaying? 

green bean: plaging 

green bean: can we go back to dogpiling rob jnstead?

Cy’s Your Guy: we’re multitasking 

Attempted Murder: and yet we can still spell

Icy Dead People: happy moon landing day btw 

Icy Dead People: I’ve been blasting this playlist all day long: spotify-moon-playlist . com 

kentucky fried: happy moon landing! uncle f jinx and me are going to this really cool talk about later 

Giant Squid: okay looks like I need to do some googling 

Icy Dead People: I can dm you the information if you want? 

Giant Squid: yes please

Cy’s Your Guy: I forgot that was coming up, been so busy with these puppets. Happy moon landing day! 

Friend Jinx: nerds 

Bumblee: puppets?

Attempted Murder: you don’t want to know 

Giant Squid: you know, I wasn’t expecting to be impressed until I saw that date. That was so long ago? You didn’t even know that we were on the bottom of the ocean but you made it to the moon? 

kentucky fried: in complete fairness i dont think we know whats on the bottom of the ocean yet

Cy’s Your Guy: not completely, no. Working with the Atlanteans has expedited it a little but the ocean is huge 

Starfire: yes the oceans of Earth are much interesting. Tamaran had water features but not with such depth. In fact, the lack of large water areas is one of the reasons Tamaran weather is so much more severe than Earth’s

Icy Dead People: takingnotes.png

Friend Jinx: I joke about you guys being nerds but it’s honestly so cool how much everyone knows about different stuff 



Notes:

Random headcanon but going with space as being one of Danny’s ghost obsessions, I hc that ghosts don’t bother him as much on 7/20 since it’s such an interesting day for his obsession and makes him more powerful

Chapter 18: Interlude 1: Secret Identities

Notes:

A little interlude to develop… not plot. Character relations? I guess?

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Interlude 1: Secret Identities 

Ladybug landed on the roof and blew a strand of hair out of her face. 

This fight was not going well. 

They needed reinforcements. Chat Noir’s timer had already run out, and Rena Rouge was acting as a distraction while Ladybug tried to think. She knew what allies she needed, what miraculous to give out, but a bigger question was weighing on her.

How did she get back to her room? 

Alya was the only other person who knew where the miraculous were, and even then she didn’t know the exact location in Marinette’s room. And Alya was very busy at the moment. 

Right now, the three of them were miles from the Dupain-Cheng bakery, and giant robot dogs were roaming the streets recording everything. Even if Marinette decided on someone she trusted, there was always the chance of being caught by the dogs.

I need advice, she decided. 

Marinette grabbed her yo-yo and navigated to where it was connected to the Titan’s communication system. She clicked on Robin’s name, and he picked up almost instantly. 

“I need advice,” Marinette said. 

Robin looked busy, the background rushing by as he zoomed upwards - using his grappling line, maybe. Green flashed behind him as he landed on a roof.

“Okay,” Robin said. “What’s up?” 

Marinette quickly described the situation - neither of them had a lot of time at the moment. 

“Okay,” Robin said. He tossed a birdarang over his shoulder without looking, and something exploded. “Would you trust another titan with that?”

“Maybe,” Marinette replied, “but a superhero would be obvious, and he has these dogs everywhere.”

“What about Phantom?” 

“Phantom?” 

She had met him a few times now, and he seemed a trustworthy friend. But why-

“He can turn invisible,” Marinette remembered.

“And intangible,” Robin added. “Perfect for sneaking past those dogs. I know it’s a scary idea, but I know you’ll make the right decision.”

It was a scary idea. But so was continuing to fight this akuma without backup, or risking going back to her place herself. And she didn’t have time to antagonize over it. 

“I’ll call him,” Marinette decided. “Thanks.”


Marinette pushed the door open to her room and forced herself to ignore her bed. Instead, she pulled out the miraculous box.

Phantom had done a good job putting everything back to where it had been. He’d also shown up, dropped off the miraculous, and disappeared without asking questions. 

Still, now that the immediate danger had passed, Marinette worried. 

At least Phantom wasn’t Parisian. He wouldn’t recognize the bakery name, and Marinette hadn’t given him hers. Coming to her place once wasn’t enough to memorize the route, not the way Alya and Nino had. And who would guess that an American ghost knew who Ladybug was, much less manage to capture him.

Marinette’s phone beeped.

Tikki floated over Marinette’s shoulder to peak at the phone. 

“It’s Phantom,” Marinette said, unlocking her phone. “He’s asking if it’s okay to meet here to talk.”

She sent back a quick yes and pushed the miraculous box back in place. 

The other kwamis were popping in and out of the box, at their own will. Most seemed to pick up on Marinette’s anxiety and exhaustion and weren’t bothering her - Wayzz had landed on her knee in silent support. As usual, Barkk was at her computer, watching something. 

The air temperature dropped a little as Phantom appeared. 

“Hey,” he said. 

“Hey,” Marinette replied. 

“Look.” Phantom scratched the back of his head, the same way Chat Noir did when he was nervous. “I know it was necessary, but I still appreciate being trusted. I promise I won’t tell anyone.”

Marinette gently shook Wayzz off her knee before standing up. “I know you won’t. And I really do appreciate the help.”  

“Do your parents know?” Phantom asked. 

“No,” Marinette said. “Only Rena does, really.” 

“That’s hard,” Phantom said. 

“It is.”

Phantom stood there, a little awkward. Marinette slumped into her desk chair - awkwardness aside, she was exhausted. 

The movement took Barkk out of the show they were watching. He popped up and, for the first time, noticed Phantom in the room. 

Marinette had messaged herself on the secure messaging system she and Tikki had set up, to tell Barkk to expect and help Phantom. Barkk was a lot like the dogs he was supposed to represent - he would make a fuss if someone he didn’t know came into Marinette’s room, but he was easily won over once he knew someone was safe. 

Phantom must have made a good impression, because Barkk darted over and started hugging him aggressively on the cheek. It made Phantom laugh.

“Nice to see you too, Barkk,” Phantom said, reaching one hand up to scratch Barkk’s head.

Marinette smiled. Something about seeing how well Barkk liked Phantom put her at ease.  

Tikki must have felt similar. She had hid when Phantom appeared, but now returned to Marinette’s shoulder.

“You must be the ladybug kwami,” Phantom guessed.

Tikki nodded. “I’m Tikki. Thank you for your help today, Phantom. It’s nice to meet you.”

Phantom nodded his head in return. “And it’s nice to meet you too.” 

“So,” Marinette said. “This is your first time in Paris, correct? How do you like it?”

“It’s big,” Phantom replied. “And crowded. Everything is on top of each other. And the catacombs are packed with ectoplasm.” 

“They do have an interesting magical energy,” Tikki agreed. “Ladybug, Rena Rouge, and I have been talking about looking into them when Hawkmoth is defeated.”

“That sounds fun,” Phantom replied. “Look, I came back because - well, Barkk asked me to, but also. I know that took a lot of trust, and I thought it would be good to even that out, you know? A secret for a secret.”

Marinette should say no. There was no reason for Phantom tell her anything, not strategically, not logically. 

But one part of her did agree with Phantom. A secret for a secret. 

Phantom closed his eyes, and changed . It reminded Marinette of detransforming, of returning to her normal self after a battle. Phantom’s white hair turned  black, his skin went from white to, well, he was still white, but in a human, alive way. He opened his eyes - still green, but not glowing. 

“Wha-“ 

“I’m a half-ghost,” Phantom said. 

“Half ghost?” Marinette asked. 

“I’ve heard of that,” Tikki said. “It’s supposed to be very rare.” 

“There’s two of us,” Phantom said. “I think I’ve mentioned I was electrocuted? It happened while I was inside this portal so I died, but I didn’t.”

“So you’re still partially alive?” Marinette asked. “How does that work? Do you have - wait, do you have a secret identity?” 

“I do.” Phantom held his hand out. “I’m Danny.”

Marinette took his head. “It’s nice to meet you, Danny. I’m Marinette.”



Notes:

Will have a follow up chapter, hopefully up tomorrow.

Chapter 19: Chapter 17: Fallout

Summary:

Not a Ninja: don’t you mean, for real?
Chat-aclysm: that’s what I said?
Not a Ninja: I meant fur real. Autocorrect

Notes:

Hahaha totally meant to post this yesterday.
Nicknames:
Lucky Charm: Ladybug
Ninetails: Rena Rouge
Not a Ninja: Carapace
Chat-aclysm: Chat Noir
major scales: Viperion

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Robin started a chat with Ladybug 

Robin: hey 

Robin: look, I don’t want to tell you how to do your job 

Ladybug: no please do I have no idea what I’m doing

Robin: okay. Have you heard the phrase don’t put all your eggs in one basket? 

Ladybug: frequently. Rena quotes it at me all the time when I drop things 

Robin: has it occurred to you that you are keeping all your eggs in one basket with the miraculous all being in one spot 

Ladybug: huh 

Ladybug: I’m doing what the last guardian of the miraculous did, I didn’t even think if it was a good idea 

Robin: tbf people often have a reason for doing things, especially when it comes to tradition 

Ladybug: true 

Ladybug: I’m going to ask Tikki, see if she knows 

Robin: Tikki? 

Ladybug: oh right! She’s the ladybug kwami. I think we’ve mentioned kwamis before? 

Robin: you have mentioned kwamis, just not by name 

Ladybug: right. Anyways I talked to her about it and she said that miracle boxes used to live in strongly guarded fortresses, so it was easier to retrieve. Also another of the kwamis here muttered something about status and power so there might be non-strategic reasons involved 

Robin: yeah power and status come up a lot when looking into traditions 

Ladybug: I’d have to ask each kwami individually to see what they’re comfortable with, but if they were interested in a change, what would you suggest? 

Robin: At the very least, a secondary location with one or two miraculouses, for if you get stuck away from the primary location or the primary location is discovered. Maybe someone else to hold onto them that you trust, like Rena

Ladybug: Rena has many little supplies 

Ladybug: *siblinfs 

Robin: understandable, little kids get into everything. The Titans have an old bunker outside of the city you can use.

Ladybug: let me think about it and talk to the kwamis 

Robin: sounds good. Let me know what you decide 

Ladybug: I will! 

Ladybug: your French is very good, btw 

Robin: thanks. I actually spent a lot of time in France growing up. Never made it to Paris, though 

Ladybug: sweet


Team Miraculous 

Queen Bee has been added to the chat 

Lucky Charm: alright everybody be nice to each other. I’m going to take a nap. Chat’s in charge 

Chat-aclysm: Wait for real? You never leave me in charge 

Not a Ninja: don’t you mean, for real? 

Chat-aclysm: that’s what I said? 

Not a Ninja: I meant fur real. Autocorrect 

Queen Bee: oh hi. I promise to be nice 

Queen Bee: but also does anyone else get sore after a battle? Pollen says the miracle cure should fix all injuries but my muscles are killing me 

Ninetails: oh yeah that’s totally a thing. Miracle cure cures injuries but not sore muscles or exhaustion 

major scales: hence lb’s nap 

Not a Ninja: hence? 

Queen Bee: wait I’m bad with peoples names who’s who

Chat-aclysm: I’m Chat Noir, Lucky Charm is lb, Ninetails is arena, Not a Ninja is Carapace, major scales is Viperion

Ninetails: arena? 

Chat-aclysm: sorry autocorrect 

Chat-aclysm: Like A Good Neigh-bor is Pegasus, monkey busness is Roi Singe, Sharp as Steel is Ryuko 

Queen Bee: thx

Ninetails: but arena? Really? 

Chat-aclysm: I said I was sorry! 

Ninetails: I’m feeling so attacked right now 

Chat-aclysm: I didn’t mean it! 

Ninetails name changed to Rena the Arena 

Chat-aclysm: Don’t do this to me 



Notes:

So I uh. Might have forgotten that Danny’s eyes are blue in human form. Which seems like a pretty big detail so idk how I forgot but… I did. Thanks to the commenter for pointing that out, and let’s all agree it’s a trick of the light.

Chapter 20: Chapter 18: The Extra Mile

Summary:

Row the Bin: row the bin? KF are you running out of ideas?
kentucky fried: still not me

Notes:

Nicknames:
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Bug Lady: Ladybug
green bean: Beast Boy
Orange You Glad: Rena Rouge
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Attempted Murder: Raven
Sparrow: Speedy
Row the Bin: Robin
kentucky fried: Kid flash
Sharp as Steel: Ryuko
Icy Dead People: Phantom
Pawsome: Chat Noir

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Chapter 18: The Extra Mile

Titans General Chat 

Giant Squid: Roi Singe you are a roll model for me

Bug Lady: don’t encourage him! 

green bean: wait whatd he do i missed it

Roi Singe: I just did what Ladybug asked?

Bug Lady: I mean, yes, but still. 

Orange You Glad: there’s a video on the Ladyblog showing what happened 

green bean: oh sweet

Cy’s Your Guy: you parisians are lucky, none of the reporters in Jump City get good videos

green bean: yeah cause ravs weird powers screw with camera

Attempted Murder: if you aren’t careful, my “weird” powers will screw with you 

Bug Lady: it’s like I asked you to run a 5k and you did a marathon. Technically you did, but you also ran the extra mile. Or thirty or so

Sparrow: a 5k is 3 miles, a marathon 26. 26 - 3 does not extra 30?

Row the Bin: I think she was doing it in kilometers?

Row the Bin: row the bin? KF are you running out of ideas?

kentucky fried: still not me 

Bug Lady: yeah I know I said miles but I was thinking kilometers 

Orange You Glad: I’m just wondering how long it took you to come up with a sports metaphor 

Bug Lady: oh I googled it 

green bean: duuuude thats so cool 

Giant Squid: I know right? 

Sharp As Steel: I was also impressed 

Roi Singe : ok sorry i walked away my mom needed sumthing but im back 

Roi Singe name changed to marathon monkey 

green bean: dude what even is your power 

marathon monkey: me

marathon monkey: ?

green bean: yeah you 

marathon monkey: the miraculous amps up a lot of my physical aptitude and then I can mess with the akumas powers but only once 

Row the Bin: all of the miraculous only work once, right? 

Bug Lady: basically. The miraculous are tied to the kwamis who have immense power, so there’s a bunch of limits so the power doesn’t overwhelm us and all the magic is used with intent 

green bean: i see

green bean: kinda reminds me of ravs powers

Attempted Murder: can you stop with the “rav”? Raven is literally two extra letters 

green bean: sorry 

Attempted Murder: but it does sound similar. If I’m not very careful with my powers, they’ll overwhelm me, and I have to know what I’m going to use them for before I start 

Bug Lady: yeas essentially 

Bug Lady: *yeah

green bean: magic seems dangerous 

Attempted Murder: it is

Icy Dead People: yeah magic is dangerous and people should be careful with messing with it 

Icy Dead People: in other news, what type of ghost attacks at one pm in July? It was so hot they were barely able to banter with me 

Pawsome: Not being able to banter with the bad guy is the worst  

Icy Dead People: for real

Icy Dead People: the worst part was that it was techno’s. He said he was attacking because he knows my heat tolerance is worse than most ghosts, created a super suit out of old cars, and then his suit preceded to overheat. Absolutely horrible time for both of us, 0/10 do not recommend 

Icy Dead People: tech is. Stupid autocorrect. 

Icy Dead People: TECHNUS HIS NAME IS TECHNIS 

Icy Dead People: nvm

Cy’s Your Guy: technology do be overheating in this heat 



Notes:

Finally saw the new superman movie and aaaaaaaaaaaaaasaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa its so good

Chapter 21: Chapter 19: Paranoia

Summary:

Starfire: bold of you to assume Robin is the only one with separation issues
green bean: hey i had seperation issues before it was cool

Notes:

Nicknames:
Attempted Murder: Raven
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Catfighter Supreme: Panthera
Secret Santa: Kole
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Sparrow: Speedy
green bean: Beast Boy
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Luting in the Streets: Jericho
Bobbin: Robin
Bumblee: Bumblebee
Friend Jinx: Jinx
Harold: Herald

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Attempted Murder: does anyone want a free teammate? I’m looking to rehome Beast Boy 

Giant Squid: we’ll take him 

Catfighter Supreme: I’d gladly team up with Beast Boy again 

Secret Santa: sure! 

Bushido: I could always use more help 

kentucky fried: hes always welcome to hang with jinx and i 

Attempted Murder: great. I’ll have his bags packed in ten minutes, you all can decide who gets him first 

Sparrow: wait what’d he do?

green bean: in my defense, the whip cream was meant for Cy 

Cy’s Your Guy: bb you have got to work on your aim. I’m literally the largest titan in our building how do you keep missing me?

green bean: youre never where i think yoill be!

Luting in the Streets: is Beast Boy a regular prankster?

Attempted Murder: he tries 

Luting in the Streets: so why is Robin so sure that it is Kid Flash who is constantly changing his name? 

kentucky fried: good question 

Bobbin: because bb has absolutely the worst luck when it comes to technology

green bean: this is very true 

Bobbin: meanwhile kf managed to give himself superpowers on purpose 

kentucky fried: it isnt me tho 

Giant Squid: so is BB coming to Titan’s East or…? 

green bean: ask robin 

Bobbin: I’d prefer to keep BB on our team but if he wants to go he can go 

Bobbin: temporarily he can go. Like, a weekend 

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah Robin has separation issues with us 

Starfire: bold of you to assume Robin is the only one with separation issues 

green bean: hey i had seperation issues before it was cool 

Cy’s Your Guy: sep a rat

green bean: do what to a rat 

Cy’s Your Guy: sep it. It’s how I remember to spell separate 

Attempted Murder: wouldn’t that be sepping a rate, not a rat?

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah that does make more sense actually

green bean: still unsure what a sep is 

Bobbin: it’s what you do to a rate 

green bean: that clears up absolutely nothing 

Bobbin: glad I could help 

Bumblee: jokes aside we could actually use BB’s help tonight. Aqualad has information that Triton’s going to make another attempt tonight and we’d all love to have some backup that can breathe underwater 

green bean: yeah dude i can totally help out 

Bobbin: that reminds me. I keep thinking I need to make a list of titans that can survive a gas attack re:scarecrow well. I’ve already been talking to Phantom about it, since he doesn’t need to breathe 

Giant Squid: I am absolutely horrible in a gas attack because gas masks don’t always cover my gills. Even if I don’t breathe through them, they can get infected from it 

Secret Santa: wait you have gills? 

Giant Squid: very small ones. Most don’t notice them 

Bobbin: good to know. BB also doesn’t do gas masks well since he shapeshifts, and I have Raven crossed off for anything that can affect emotions

Attempted Murder: very smart

Bumblee: any reason for the concern? 

Bobbin: in complete honesty? No, just nightmares 

Bumblee: understandable 

Giant Squid: yeah we get that 

kentucky fried: mood 

Attempted Murder: yeah I figured 

Red Star: if we’re talking about nightmares, does anyone have a plan for nuclear war? 

Bobbin: yes

kentucky fried: yes 

Bumblee: I do 

Sparrow: yeah 

Catfighter Supreme: of course 

Bushido: I have a plan for a different situation that is similar enough to apply

Red Star: okay just checking

Bobbin: another backup plan I’ve been working on is for if the JL goes bad. It’s highly unlikely, but with mind control, magic, etc, it’s possible 

Friend Jinx: oh hey KF and I were talking about that the other day 

Giant Squid: not-speedy and I have talked about it too 

Luting in the Streets: it’s come up a few times in our planning sessions as well

Harold: wow we’re a paranoid bunch, aren’t we? 

Bobbin: I wouldn’t call it paranoia when it’s saved my life before

Attempted Murder: I would 

Secret Santa: trust me, you don’t know paranoia until you’ve met my dad 

Harold: fair enough



Notes:

Realized when editing this that I got Harold (the nickname) and Herald (real character’s name) mixed up. Fixed it, but might think about changing that nickname some time soon

Chapter 22: Chapter 20: Eggs in a Bucket

Summary:

Ladybug: ox. Don’t know why that corrected to Ozzie?
Chat Noir: lol imagine an Ozzie miraculous. What powers would that even be? A blast of rock music?

Notes:

No nicknames for this chapter. Enjoy :)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Ladybug created Eggs in a Bucket chat

Ladybug added Chat Noir, Rena Rouge, and Robin to the chat 

Ladybug: hey so following up on what Robin and I discussed about the miraculouses, I think I finally got a straight answer out of the kwamis 

Rena Rouge: imprsssice 

Chat Noir:

Rena Rouge: I meant impressive siblings were being siblings 

Robin: wait if this is going to be a strategy talk, Bumblebee is a good person to include too

Ladybug: oh right 

Ladybug added Bumblebee to the chat

Ladybug: okay to get you up to speed: miraculouses were traditionally kept together in boxes in a fortress, so I was keeping the box together, but Robin pointed out the strategic reasons not to, so I talked with the other kwamis about it

Bumblebee: hence the name. Don’t keep all your eggs in the same basket 

Ladybug: exactly 

Robin: so what did the kwamis say? 

Ladybug: ok so

Ladybug: Pollen wants to wait to see how things with Queen Bee work out

Rena Rouge: why? 

Ladybug: I don’t know. Pollen is a lot more patient than I am 

Rena Rouge: you have been a saint when dealing with QB 

Ladybug: thanks

Ladybug: anyways, Wayzz is on board with trying out Carapace as a permanent wielder 

Robin: he does seem trustworthy 

Ladybug: he is. And I know he’ll treat Wayzz well 

Ladybug: Mullo likes the overall idea but is unsure about what they want

Bumblebee: Mullo is?

Ladybug: the mouse kwami. Mullo is a “big picture” kwami, apparently, and isn’t used to dealing with small details? I’m leaning towards keeping them with me, since they’re so good with strategy

Chat Noir: what about multimouse? 

Ladybug: one good run with the miraculous doesn’t make me willing to trust her 

Chat Noir: yeah okay that’s fair 

Bumblebee: if they’re good at strategy and figuring things out, then they’re a good plan B. I’d put them in the secondary location, so if someone needs to grab them when you’re not able to help they can help.

Ladybug: good point.

Chat Noir: so where is the secondary location going to be? 

Ladybug: Robin knew a location. I’ll give it to you and Rena in private 

Ladybug: Stompp wants to be paired up with a hero but I don’t know who else I trust. Roarr prefers to stay with me. 

Ladybug: Stompp is the Ozzie and Roarr the tiger kwami

Ladybug: ox. Don’t know why that corrected to Ozzie? 

Chat Noir: lol imagine an Ozzie miraculous. What powers would that even be? A blast of rock music? 

Robin: wait are these zodiac themed? 

Ladybug: yeah. The original guardians of the miraculous had a lot of miraculouses to deal with, so they often used themes like the Zodiacs to sort them

Robin: so the next would be the rabbit?

Ladybug: yeah, Fluff. No one can get a straight answer from Fluff, so I’m leaving them be 

Ladybug: Longg is the dragon kwami. He’s mostly interested in staying with Ryuko, which makes me anxious cause Ryuko blew her identity with Hawkmoth, but she’s a real solid fighter so idk. Longg said they’re very patient so I don’t think I have to decide now. 

Ladybug: Sass also wants to stay with Viperion

Chat Noir: Viperion’s cool, I’d trust him 

Robin: Viperion should definitely be ready to go at a moment’s notice, considering his powers

Ladybug: Tikki agrees, actually 

Ladybug: Kaalki is also interested in staying with Pegasus, but I’m not as willing with him, yet 

Bumblebee: that’s valid. Trust takes time 

Ladybug: Ziggy and Orikko want to stay with me. Barkk says he wants to stay with me but I think he just likes my computer. Xuppu said he’s fine with anything that doesn’t require going back into the box for long periods of time. 

Ladybug: Daizzi is willing to go with Mullo to the second location, but idk I’d almost rather a group of three 

Chat Noir: why? We made a good duo by ourselves 

Ladybug: true, but our powers balance each other out. Theirs doesn’t 

Robin: in my experience, people are able to work with whatever powers they are given 

Rena Rouge: in my experience, Mullo is energetic and can handle a lot at once, and Daizzi is calmer but always upbeat. Seems like a good pair to me

Robin: good point. In the zodiac story, the mouse convinced another animal to help him so that he could be the first to finish the race, while the pig was happy with whatever place he got and took his time. A lot like Cyborg and BB can be, actually 

Bumblebee: yeah Sparky can be a bit too motivated sometimes. Like babe, slow down 

Ladybug: I understand the feeling 

Rena Rouge: babe you are that feeling



Notes:

Happy August!

Chapter 23: Chapter 21: TBD

Summary:

Bug Lady: glad to see we’re all hypocrites here
Robblehead: do as I say not as I do

Notes:

Nicknames:
Sparrow: Speedy
Robblehead/Mom Friend: Robin
Cy’s Your Guy/One Man Geek Squad: Cyborg
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Asparagus/green bean: Beast Boy
Bumblee: Bumblebee
Sharp As Steel: Ryuko
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Secret Santa: Kole
windows no long supports: Kid Flash
Star Light, Star Bright: Starfire
Pink Hair and Pronouns: Jinx

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Sparrow: I have figured it out 

Robblehead: figured what out? 

Sparrow: drum roll please 

Cy’s Your Guy: drumrollingdownstreet.gif 

Bug Lady: it’s wayy too early for that dude 

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah isn’t it like, 4 AM where you are? 

Bug Lady: essentially 

Bumblee: go to bed girl 

green bean: yeah seriously dude

Robblehead: sleep is important lb 

Sparrow: yeah go to sleep 

Icy Dead People: sleep 

Bug Lady: glad to see we’re all hypocrites here 

Robblehead: do as I say not as I do 

Cy’s Your Guy: anyway what was the announcement? 

Sparrow: right! Drumroll please 

Sparrow name changed to Arrowpoint 

green bean: meh

Arrowpoint: meh? 

Sharp As Steel: I like it. Sounds like holding someone at knifepoint but with an arrow.

Arrowpoint: thank you 

Robblehead : I don’t know, I thought you didn’t want arrow in your name?

Arrowpoint: I didn’t but it’s the most threatening part of being an archer, couldn’t avoid it 

green bean: i thi nk you can do better

Attempted Murder: I didn’t know you thought 

green bean: ha ha ha 

Giant Squid: you already know I don’t like it 

Arrowpoint: and you already know I don’t cat 

Secret Santa: is this one of the situations where I say I like it regardless or should I give my honest feedback? Sorry my social skills are a little rusty after spending so long with only Gnarrk

Arrowpoint: if you have actual feedback and not just dislike like BB and Aqualad sure 

Secret Santa: okay so in my complete honest opinion I think you need something that rolls off the tongue better. Something about the row in arrow and the oi in point clash 

Arrowpoint: see that was actual useful feedback. Thank you Kole 

Giant Squid: that’s what I meant 

Arrowpoint: that’s not what you said 

Bumblee : what is it with the two of you these past days? 

Giant Squid: I don’t know! It’s all him! 

Arrowpoint: I didn’t realize we were acting different? 

Giant Squid: you’ve got to be kidding me 

Arrowpoint: yeah okay now that I’m saying it I think Kole’s right 

Arrowpoint name changed to TBD 

TBD name changed to Sparrow

Sparrow: hey 

Robblehead: :)


Dick and his Del-tones

Mom Friend: hey Cy you know whats going on in East? 

One Man Geek Squad: so it’s possible that Not-Speedy is going through the same thing I was when we set up Titans East 

Mom Friend: ugh don’t remind. E

Mom Friend: *remind me 

Asparagus: yeah you really scared us 

Attempted Murder: still, it makes sense. 

windows no longer supports: what is the plan, after were all adults?

Mom Friend: technically you and Cy are adults

windows no longer supports: dont remind me 

Star Light, Star Bright: adulthood is a topic that wracks our nerves, but I am sure we will figure something out 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: you’re optimism is actually great sometimes, Star

Star Light, Star Bright: thank you friend Jinx!

Asparagus: i still have time before the adultining happens 

Attempted Murder: I’m not convinced you’ll ever be an adult 

Asparagus: good cause it looks exhausting 



Notes:

Thanks for all the kudos and comments!

Chapter 24: Chapter 22: Too School for Cool

Summary:

Herald: honestly I’m with Bumblebee. I really think we should be encouraging the others to go back to school, even if it’s just online like I’m doing
Herald: except for Jericho. He already knows too much

Notes:

Nicknames:
One Man Geek Squad: Cyborg
Star Light, Star Bright: Starfire
Mom Friend: Robin
Asparagus: Beast Boy
windows no longer supports: Kid Flash
Attempted Murder: Raven
Pink Hair and Pronouns: Jinx

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Chapter 22: Too School for Cool

Dick and His Del-tones

One Man Geek Squad: okay here’s the agreed upon renovations 

One Man Geek Squad: finalFINALfinalrenovationplanv5FINAL.doc 

One Man Geek Squad: if you have a problem with this, speak now or forever hold your peace. All in agreement, say aye. 

Star Light, Star Bright: AYE

Mom Friend: aye

Asparagus: aye 

Attempted Murder: aye 

windows no longer supports: aye 

Mom Friend: kf you don’t get a vote you don’t live here 

windows no longer supports: theres an easy way to fix that problem

Mom Friend: it’s not a problem 

One Man Geek Squad: well that’s five ayes so it’s settled. Renovations begin now, please grab your camping gear and head to the roof to set up camp for the night

One Man Geek Squad: also Jinx and KF you are totally invited to camp out with us this weekend it’ll be fun 

windows no longer supports: unfort we already have plans with titans south 

Mom Friend: cool

Asparagus: youre cheating on us with ts?

windows no longer supports: as rob likes to remind everyone, were not technically a part of titans central 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: nor do we want to be. We enjoy being in Central City helping the Flash and getting a chance to finish high school 

windows no longer supports: yeah true 

Asparagus: i still feel cheated on 

One Man Geek Squad: it is too bad that you’ll miss our weekend camp-out but enjoy Fevereiro

windows no longer supports: we will

windows no longer supports: want us to bring you any souvenirs 

Mom Friend: now is not the time to be getting more random trinkets 

One Man Geek Squad: there is a sauce Panthera sends me sometimes from there if you see it 

One Man Geek Squad: img88546.png

Pink Hair and Pronouns: we’ll keep an eye out for it 

One Man Geek Squad: thanks 


Kid Flash created Too School for Cool Chat

Kid Flash name changed to popeyes kitchen 

popeyes kitchen: anywho i think i got everyone in here thats starting school soon 

Ladybug: schools already started for us. They decided to start earlier than normal because of expected days off for akumas 

popeyes kitchen: oof

Chat Noir: Personally I like school 

Carapace: dude why? 

Chat Noir: Because its an excuse to get out of the house 

popeyes kitchen: you know i can understand that 

Bumblebee: I’m always surprised at how many titans have just given up on school. Especially the other leaders, like Red Star and Robin

Bumblebee: especially Robin 

Beast Boy: dude robin hates school or at least sitting still for that long 

Beast Boy: he swears he learns better if he’s upside down 

Argent: Red Star has already graduated school. He was in the military when everything hit the fan for him. 

Beast Boy: yeah and cy got his ged pretty soon after becoming a titan so ravens the only one who like does the school thing 

Beast Boy: and me this year 

Beast Boy: this is what i get for making up with the dp 

Ladybug: dp? 

Beast Boy: doom patrol 

Ladybug: oh yeah I’ve totally heard of them 

Herald: honestly I’m with Bumblebee. I really think we should be encouraging the others to go back to school, even if it’s just online like I’m doing

Herald: except for Jericho. He already knows too much 

Raven: not everyone is suited for school and that is okay 

Roi Singe: yeah but schools have sports teams and those are fun 

Beast Boy: only if youre athletic 

Bumblebee: are we not all athletic as heroes? 

Raven: no 

Ladybug: being a hero takes a lot of physical stamina and ability but that’s very, very different from the type of athletic people in sports are

Beast Boy: exactly 

Ladybug: I say that with the utmost respect of anyone who is into sports 

Beast Boy: like, you can tell that cy use to play football 

Argent: that does explain a lot, actually 

Beast Boy: doesnt it ? 

Argent: also what type of school is everyone doing and what subjects? I’m doing an online course in mechanical engineering 

Bumblebee: I’m taking “dual-enrollment” classes online with Steel City Community College. Getting a start in my English and humidors for if I go to college for real 

Chat Noir: humidors?

Bumblebee: huminites

Bumblebee: that’s not it either 

Ladybug: I’m still in the school before uni 

Ladybug: I do not remember the English term for it 

Chat Noir: Same for most of team miraculous 

Herald: I’m catching up on my high school credits online. I would’ve been a junior if I had stayed 

Ladybug: idontknowandimafriadtoask(1)(1).png 

Herald: eleventh grade, second to last year before college 

Ladybug: college is university, right? Because it means something very different here 

Herald: yeah 

Beast Boy: im catching up on high school too i guess my english skills neds work 

Raven: I’m taking an online university course in literature 

Rena Rouge: oh cool! 

popeyes kitchen: im redoing senior year (final year) since i didnt finish it last year 

Jinx: I’m completing a few credits that weren’t offered at HIVE so I can get a legit high school degree 

Bushido: I am completing an online school course in engineering this year. Titans West seem to be the least tech adept team.

popeyes kitchen: sure but there are tons of us willing to help you 

Bushido: and I appreciate that, but just as there are some who struggle with formal learning, I have found that a structured school setting is personally helpful. 

popeyes kitchen: if that floats your goat then sure

Ladybug: what? 

popeyes kitchen: its something uncle f says a lot

Raven: it’s a variation of “float your boat” people say. It’s supposed to be nonsense

Ladybug: thanks 



Notes:

I should probably figure out the definitive ages I’m using for this. I know I have Red Star, Cyborg, and Kid Flash as eighteen, I need to decide on the rest.

Chapter 25: Chapter 23: S'mores and More

Summary:

Cy’s Your Guy: you’re good everyone just showed up to smores except ts and the Paris team
Cy’s Your Guy: because the Paris team should be sleeping
Cy’s Your Guy: I know you were typing lb

Notes:

Nicknames:
Pawsome: Chat Noir
Icy Dead People: Phantom
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Friend Jinx: Jinx
Harold: Herald
Luting in the Streets: Jericho
Secret Santa: Kole
Bumblee: Bumblebee
Turdus Migratorius: Robin
green bean: Beast Boy
Sparrow: Speedy
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Catfighter Supreme: Panthera
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Pawsome: Chat Noir
Hot n Cold: Hotspot

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Ravager has been added to the chat

Starfire: hello new friend! Welcome to the chat! 

Icy Dead People: welcome 

kentucky fried: huh i dont know who you are 

kentucky fried: i though i knew everyone in the heroes business 

Ravager: I wouldn’t say I was in the hero business exactly

Friend Jinx: oh same 

Harold: wait aren’t you Jericho’s sister?

Ravager: I did not finally shake up years of my fathers influence, lock away the mask I used to impersonate him, join his mortal enemies, and begin seeking an identity away from being his daughter just to become Jericho’s sister

Harold: I mean that’s fair, but I was hoping for some embarrassing childhood stories about him 

Ravager: …. I might be able to help

Luting in the Streets: :(

Ravager: by the way, I kinda sorta need a place to stay? I’m at the original titans tower but they’re doing renovations 

Bushido: Titans West desperately needs more fighter

Red Star: Titans North could use the help too. I think we’re the only team without a skilled hand-to-hand fighter 

Secret Santa: we do have Gnarrk 

Bumblee: you should come to Titans East! Not-speedy keeps talking about taking a vacation and he might actually do it if he knew we had another teammate 

Bumblee: also tn is fighting snowmen and tw have been fighting some random cult but we’re getting to do some high-tech car chases with this new biker gang

Ravager: alright I’m sold 

Harold: I can come get you and portal you to Titans East and then we can embarrassing Jericho moments 

Ravager: can you wait an hour we’re doing s’mores?

Turdus Migratorius: Herald you can join for s’mores as well 

Turdus Migratorius: kf what even is this? 

kentucky fried: not. me.

green bean: oooh i know this one! its the scientific name for the american robin 

Turdus Migratorius: you’re joking, right? 

Sparrow: it has been too long since I’ve had s’more’s

Giant Squid: okay I’ll be the one to bite. What are s’mores? 

Sparrow: …

kentucky fried: omg youve never had smores????

Harold: I’m picking you up and taking you to titans central because smores are wonderful 

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah you all are all invited! Come have some smores with us! 

Catfighter Supreme: unfortunately kill 

Cy’s Your Guy: umm Panthera? Everything alright?

Catfighter Supreme: sorry I dropped my communicator and it apparently autofilled with kill. As I was saying, unfortunately Titans South is busy right now 

Argent: I have never had a s’more, are they good? 

Cy’s Your Guy: come over and try them out!

Bug Lady: hi sorry just got back from Akuma but hi new person! 

Pawsome: ooh hi! 

Ravager: hello! 

Pawsome: also I could totally go for some sweets right now 

Harold: I can meet you all at the usual spot to portal you to titans central? 

Carapace: no team miraculous needs to go to bed 

Carapace: that was nearly thirty hours of back to back akumas 

Catfighter Supreme: and Herald really should be focusing on his own team right now 

Bumblee: thirty hours of akumas back to back? 

Bug Lady: ugg yeah hm occasionally goes on these long marathons to try to tire us out and it sucks 

Bug Lady: but yeah team miraculous go get some sleep

Sparrow: thirty hours is insane. I remember doing something like that back when I was in Star City and it sucked 

Giant Squid: I’ve done something like that a few times and it is pretty harsh 

Hot n Cold: I was pretty close to thirty hours a few days before Robin found me in Morocco. It was getting so bad I couldn’t flame up 

Friend Jinx: I’ve pulled a few all-nighters studying for exams but never fighting anyone

Luting in the Streets: I did a training program with my older brother once that made us stay up that long. Never again 

Icy Dead People: are we just ignoring that ladybug just told someone to go to bed? 

Sparrow: I think we’ve established that we’re all hypocrites here 

Secret Santa: I didn’t know you had an older brother Jericho? 

Luting in the Streets: I did. He died a few years ago 

Secret Santa: oh sorry to hear that  

Luting in the Streets: it’s okay. I miss him but life goes on 


Luting in the Streets: I did not mean to kill the chat 

Cy’s Your Guy: you’re good everyone just showed up to smores except ts and the Paris team 

Cy’s Your Guy: because the Paris team should be sleeping 

Cy’s Your Guy: I know you were typing lb

Bug Lady: sorry I had to get up to help my parents with chores 

kentucky fried: booo 

kentucky fried: go back to bed

Bug Lady: I promised I would help them though! Besides I’d have to get up soon for school anyways 

kentucky fried: call out sick 

Cy’s Your Guy: maybe call out sick? 

Luting in the Streets: I would suggest calling out sick

Icy Dead People: call out sick or I will haunt you

Turdus Migratorius: I agree with the others, you should call out sick

Friend Jinx: blow school off and go back to bed 

Bumblee: I will dm Rena if you don’t go back to bed 

Bug Lady: okay okay I’ll go back to bed you don’t have to bring Rena into this 

Bug Lady: my parents seem to have caught on that I’m not feeling my best so they’re sending me back to bed anyways 

kentucky fried: rare parenting w

kentucky fried: also aqualad im dging to know how you like smores 

Giant Squid: dging? 

kentucky fried: dying 

Giant Squid: then perish 

Giant Squid: but yeah smores are good 



Notes:

Added in Ravager since she’s in the comics, and I thought having a pair of siblings in the chat would be interesting

Chapter 26: Chapter 24: We All Scream

Summary:

Attempted Murder: blueberry ice cream usually comes out purple, not blue
Cy’s Your Guy: well that’s just false advertising

Notes:

Nicknames:
green bean: Beast Boy
Luting in the Streets: Jericho
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Pawsome: Chat Noir
Icy Dead People: Phantom
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Attempted Murder: Raven
Erithacus Rubecula: Robin
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Orange You Glad: Rena Rouge
marathon monkey: Roi Singe
Harold: Herald
Secret Santa: Kole

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

20 new messages 

green bean: anyways that was the last time mento let me near his helmet 

Luting in the Streets: so that’s what Robin means when he says you have bad luck with technology 

Ravager: wild

Bug Lady: ew 

green bean: ew? 

Bug Lady: sorry wrong chat 

Pawsome: yeah we’re talking about ice cream in the team miraculous chat 

Icy Dead People: ooh ice cream 

Bug Lady: a new ice cream shop opened up in Paris and it has some interesting flavors 

Pawsome: it also has some hero-inspired sundaes that I purrsonally think are pawsome 

Bug Lady: … 

Cy’s Your Guy: oooh what kind of sundaes? 

Pawsome: there’s the ladybug sundae, which is raspberry sorbet mixed with blackberries with marshmallow “lucky charms” 

Bug Lady: the chat noir one is chocolate with chocolate pieces sticking out and some weird green “mint” syrup that does not taste like mint 

Bug Lady: Rena’s is orange flavored, of course. Nine marshmallows as “tails” and a chocolate piece that is supposed to look like a flute

Attempted Murder: the ladybug one doesn’t sound too bad except for the marshmallows 

Erithacus Rubecula: I’m a little concerned about the green syrup 

Erithacus Rubecula: I’m assuming this is a European Robin, KF? 

kentucky fried: i wouldnt know i didnt choose it as i have told you MULTIPLE TIMES 

Cy’s Your Guy: wow I didn’t know you knew where the shift key was kf 

green bean: but yeah thags an euro robin 

Attempted Murder: it’s a much more pleasant name than the American Robin 

Giant Squid: shush I want to hear the rest of the flavors 

Bug Lady: right okay so the Carapace ice cream is two scoops of mint chocolate chip with a shell of dried chocolate around it 

Carapace: which sucks because I don’t like mint 

Bug Lady: there’s a Queen Bee ice cream that’s pineapple flavored with stripes of chocolate syrup across it that just isn’t it 

Pawsome: the ryuko is three scoops of berry banana and coconut 

Pawsome: it’s berry good 

Bug Lady: I hate it here 

Orange You Glad: the Viperion one is the worst, it’s cotton candy and mint chocolate chip 

Attempted Murder: ew 

Starfire: I much like the candy that resembles cotton, but I did not know it was a type of ice cream? It did not seem very icy or creamy.

Erithacus Rubecula: it’s not. Cotton candy ice cream is supposed to be flavored like cotton candy, but it really just tastes like sugar 

Starfire: oh I see! 

Bug Lady: I will say that the Pegasus ice cream is good. It’s brownie bites in chocolate and vanilla ice cream 

Erithacus Rubecula: that sounds much more like a classic ice cream 

Bug Lady: and then Roi Singe is banana-flavored ice cream with vanilla wafers and half of a chocolate covered banana, which I guess is good if you like bananas? 

kentucky fried: you should tell them to do some of the other titans 

Orange You Glad: well what flavors would you all be? 

Erithacus Rubecula: kf would probably be banana, maybe with some cherries? 

green bean: ig id be stuck with mint flavor like carapace 

Cy’s Your Guy: Robin could be raspberry, maybe banana or mint?

Erithacus Rubecula: there are other flavors for green, like that matcha flavor Raven likes 

Cy’s Your Guy: ooh Raven could be blackberries, or maybe blueberries 

Attempted Murder: blueberry ice cream usually comes out purple, not blue 

Cy’s Your Guy: well that’s just false advertising 

green bean: i could see a cyborg ice cream with like cotton candy and vanilla 

Erithacus Rubecula: that leaves Starfire. I’d pick raspberry, grape, and maybe add full green grapes for her starbursts 

Erithacus Rubecula: I mean starbolts. I guess I have candy on my mind 

Starfire name changed to Pink Starburst

Sparrow: you could do blueberry and blackberry with Swedish fish for Aqualad 

Giant Squid: and then raspberry and orange for not-speedy 

kentucky fried: strawberry for jinx 

Erithacus Rubecula: maybe add chocolate covered strawberries like they did with Roi Singe 

marathon monkey: okay just caught up with this chat where is the ice cream shop actually at? 

Bug Lady: oh it’s by the Eiffel Tower themed restaurant near the DC Bakery 

marathon monkey: the eiffel tower one with all the beams or the eiffel tower one with the fancy cake 

Bug Lady: the beams 

marathon monkey: sweet thanks 

kentucky fried:  a phantom themed one woukd be like vanilla with with those star shape sprinkles or maybe those ghosts one that come out in fall 

Icy Dead People: oh come on don’t make me the boring flavors 

Bug Lady: if you want white you can do coconut, passion fruit, or white chocolate, or even banana can be white 

Bug Lady: pistachio is usually white too 

Bug Lady: and cookie dough flavors 

Icy Dead People: yeah I’ll be cookie dough 

Ravager: Jericho can be vanilla 

Luting in the Streets: I think I would rather be blueberry flavored. I like purple 

Harold: no surprise there 

Ravager: vanilla and blueberry then 

green bean: okay now the blueberry purple thing is bothering me 

Bug Lady: I mean you could die it blue

Bug Lady: dye it? 

Erithacus Rubecula: dye it is correct but I think we all got what you meant with die 

Attempted Murder: you don’t even like ice cream why do you care what color it is 

green bean: I like ice cream it just has to be vegan 

Icy Dead People: but vegan ice cream tastes so weird

Cy’s Your Guy: it’s barely ice cream at that point

Erithacus Rubecula: be nice about other people’s dietary restrictions 

Luting in the Streets: there are actually some really good vegan ice creams if you know where to look 

Ravager: what are you a vegan now? 

Luting in the Streets: yes? I’ve been trying to go vegan for a few months now 

Ravager: huh 

Ravager: why? 

Luting in the Streets: because it’s better for the environment? 

Erithacus Rubecula: is it really that much better for the ein

Icy Dead People: S is a vegan for similar reason

Bug Lady: Robin are you okay? 

green bean: he’s fine we just got an alert for something happening downtown so he’s all business now 

Secret Santa: ooh what ice cream would I be? 

Bug Lady: strawberry and vanilla for you I think 

Icy Dead People: I think Red Star would be strawberry and raspberry since his powers are very red

Bug Lady: hot fudge sundae for Hot Spot. And I think Jinx would be more bubblegum then strawberry 

Friend Jinx: yeah very true 



Notes:

Anyways I want ice cream now

Chapter 27: Chapter 25: Study Session

Summary:

Attempted Murder: what about this?
Attempted Murder: phantomchangeyourdocumentnamesiswear.docx

Notes:

Nicknames:
Bumblee: Bumblebee
Pawsome: Chat Noir
green bean: Beast Boy
Icy Dead People: Phantom
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Early Bird and Its Worm: Robin
Sparrow: Speedy
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
Harold: Herald
Attempted Murder: Raven
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Catfighter Supreme: Panthera

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Bumblee: You’re all intelligent people 

Pawsome: pressxtodoubt.png 

green bean: um have you met me

Icy Dead People: are you sure about that? 

kentucky fried: how dare you 

Bumblee: so ignoring that, I need help with updating our bikes for this newest issue with the Brotherhood of Blood v3. Not-Speedy, Aqualad, and I have been working on this for days and haven’t figured anything out, but a few pairs of fresh eyes might be good.

Bumblee: bikeworkinprogressbobv3.docx

Early Bird and Its Worm: the brotherhood of blood is back? 

Bumblee: kinda 

Early Bird and Its Worm: you have to send more updates Bee 

Bumblee: sorry! We’ve been busy with that weird biker-spaceship gang and now this 

Early Bird and Its Worm: how’s Ravager doing?

Bumblee: she’s fitting in fine. She’s already saved our butts in battle once 

kentucky fried: have you tried this

kentucky fried: bikeupgrade1.docx

Sparrow: not a bad idea 

Icy Dead People: bikeworkinprogressbobv3(1).docx  

Icy Dead People: best idea I’ve got, but I can ask T if you want 

Bumblee: the more brains the better 

kentucky fried: ooh that is not a bad suggest either phantom

kentucky fried: combining the two: 

kentucky fried: bikeupgrade2.docx

Red Star: I have an old design that might be relevant 

Red Star: motorcycleidea3(5).docx 

kentucky fried: ooh 

Bug Lady: I can send this to Pegasus? 

Bumblee: do it 

Cy’s Your Guy: going off of Phantom’s idea

Cy’s Your Guy: titanseastbikedesign.docx 

Harold: okay not relevant to the Magic thing but I do think you’ll get more stability on the bikes if you do this 

Harold: bikeworkinprogressbobv3stabilizeridea.docx 

Icy Dead People: after a quick text with T, he suggests this 

Icy Dead People: bikeworkinprogressbobv3(1)(1).docx 

Attempted Murder: what about this?

Attempted Murder: phantomchangeyourdocumentnamesiswear.docx 

kentucky fried: okay okay combining all of that 

Bug Lady: te_bike.docx

kentucky fried:  bikeupgrade3.docx

Bug Lady: from Pegasus 

Bumblee: two things 

Bumblee: 1) I don’t want any of you insulting your intelligence again 

Bumblee: 2) damn you all work fast 

kentucky fried: superspeed 

Cy’s Your Guy: I absolutely love working on vehicles so I already had a few ideas 

Sparrow: here’s a design I had a while back that I can’t figure out how to implement, but it seems similar to yours Herald if you want to look 

Sparrow: bikeschematicswip11.docx 

Icy Dead People: oh here’s a design for a bike battery that could hold up a little better with those changes 

Icy Dead People: untitledimg345(7).docx

kentucky fried: okay so taking all that information into account you need a better battery 

kentucky fried: oh nvm phantom beat me to it 

Cy’s Your Guy: Phantom I am stealing that battery design that is genius 

Icy Dead People: can’t steal it from me if I give it to you willingly 

kentucky fried: anywho 

Cy’s Your Guy: why does that give me fae vibes?

kentucky fried: bikeupgrade5.docx

Bumblee: thanks

Cy’s Your Guy: anyone else need help while we’re all in the mood?

Icy Dead People: yes

Red Star: yes 

Giant Squid: we have other problems if you’re bored

Catfighter Supreme: yes 

kentucky fried: yeah actually 

Early Bird and Its Worm: we have our own projects that could use help too if anyone’s up to it? 

Cy’s Your Guy: team engineering party let’s go! 

Early Bird and Its Worm: give me a second and I can have some kind of drop box server set up, so we don’t crowd the chat

Early Bird and Its Worm: also Pegasus and this mysterious T friend both seem to be good with computers 

Bug Lady: yeah Pegasus definitely is

Icy Dead People: would you even describe him as… mysTeerious?

Early Bird and Its Worm: ignoring that, do you think they’d be up for a challenge? 

Bug Lady: what did you have in mind? 



Notes:

Pegasus and Tucker will be back in the next chapter

Chapter 28: Chapter 26: And The Truth Comes Out

Summary:

Ruby Breasted: perfect
Bug Lady: chat don’t
Pawsome: don’t you mean, purr - oh never mind

Notes:

As promised
Nicknames:
Attempted Murder: Raven
Ruby Breasted: Robin
Icy Dead People/Phantastic: Phantom
Bug Lady/Lucky Charm: Ladybug
Pawsome/Chat-aclysm: Chat Noir
marathon monkey/monkey business: Roi Singe
major scales: Viperion
Rena the Arena: Rena Rouge
Like A Good Neigh-bor: Pegasus
Not a Ninja: Carapace
Sharp As Steel: Ryuko
Doom Queen: Sam
King Tut: Tucker
All That Jazz: Jazz

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Pegasus has joined the chat 

Pegasus: I have finished my investigation. Here’s my report 

Pegasus: tgc_investigation.docx

Attempted Murder: you all know that you can put spaces into document names now, right? 

Pegasus: underscores make me feel cool 

Pegasus name changed to Underscorer

Ruby Breasted: thanks for your report, Pegasus

Underscorer: you’re welcome 

Icy Dead People: T is still working on his 

Underscorer: understandable. I had an advantage as I had my miraculous last night and could use that

Ruby Breasted: perfect 

Bug Lady: chat don’t 

Pawsome: don’t you mean, purr - oh never mind 

marathon monkey: oh hey peggy 

Underscorer: hello Roi Singe 

Ruby Breasted: this report is well-written, Pegasus. Thanks again for being willing to help us 

Underscorer: it wasn’t a problem at all 


Team Miraculous 

Chat-aclysm: are you going to check on Pegasus or should I?

major scales: did something happen

Rena the Arena: just a major fangirling event 

Lucky Charm: he’s keeping his cool in the main chat, but I might swing by later anyways 

Like A Good Neigh-bor: you all know I’m in this chat too, right? 

Lucky Charm: how are you doing, Pegasus? Not hyperventilating? 

Like A Good Neigh-bor: I’ll admit I didn’t expect Robin’s praise to feel this good, but I will leave the extreme fangirling to Rena.

Rena the Arena: I have enough for the both of us 

Queen Bee: but he works with Ladybug, who’s much cooler than Robin 

Lucky Charm: thanks QB

major scales: i agree with queen 

Lucky Charm: wait stop 

Rena the Arena: me too although im biased 

Lucky Charm: babe no 

Chat-aclysm: keep going I think we can make her key smash 

Not a Ninja: I definitely think Ladybug is cooler than the American heroes 

Lucky Charm: nooo don’t do this too me 

Sharp As Steel: Ladybug is definitely my favorite hero 

monkey busness: yeah lb your great!!!

Rena the Arena: oooh we got her blushing 

Like A Good Neigh-bor: I was calm when I first worked with Ladybug, too 

Rena the Arena: I was not 

Lucky Charm: yeah but it was cute on you 


Team Phantom

Phantastic: tucker you’ve got to step up your game, Pegasus already did his part 

King Tut: well the dude must be magic because there’s no hacking this 

Doom Queen: yeah Tucker you’re making team phantom look bad 

King Tut: I’m trying. I’m even using that super high-tech stuff we got off technus. Robin has the security done tight 

All That Jazz: but that’s a good thing? 

Phantastic: if you’ve done everything you can think to do, then just write up a report and I’ll send it to Robin

King Tut: you can’t just except me to write a report that lives up to Robin’s expectations 

Phantastic: it’s not that hard? I’ve been sending in reports for a couple weeks now 

All That Jazz: if you’re having an easy time with those reports, maybe it’ll make school easier!

Phantastic: you’re being a little too optimistic there 


Pegasus started a chat with Robin

Pegasus: I hope I’m not overstepping by dming you 

Robin: you’re good, what’s up? 

Pegasus: while investigating the chat, I saw the problem with the name changes you’ve been having. You seem to be under the impression that Kid Flash is behind them

Robin: oh no I know it’s Cyborg 

Robin: I’m just saying it’s KF so Cyborg doesn’t suspect that I’m planning on getting him back. Also because annoying KF is fun

Pegasus: oh okay then 



Notes:

So the truth finally comes out.

Chapter 29: Chapter 27: Forgiven but not Forgotten

Summary:

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah I’ve had my tech stolen, Star has an evil sister, BB once downloaded a virus into my brain that made me eat anything. We’ve all had our judgements affected by one thing or another.

Notes:

Nicknames:
Bumblebee: Bumblebee
Flycatcher: Robin
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Giant Squid: Aqualad
Luting in the Streets: Jericho
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
Harold: Herald
Sparrow: Speedy
Icy Dead People: Phantom
Orange You Glad: Rena Rouge
Underscorer: Pegasus
marathon monkey: Roi Singe
Pawsome: Chat Noir
Sharp As Steel: Ryuko
Attempted Murder: Raven
Cy’s Your Guy: Cyborg
green bean: Beast Boy

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat 

Bumblee: so we had a surprise visitor at Titans East today 

Flycatcher: oh? 

Bumblee: img77532.png 

Bug Lady: is that Aquaman? 

Bumblee: yep! Apparently kings of the sea don’t need to call ahead 

Giant Squid: yeah he’s like that 

Flycatcher: what did he want? 

Bumblee: someone he was tracking ended up at the Steel City Docks, so he wanted to make sure we were updated with what was going on and if we could help him

Luting in the Streets: were you able to catch them?

Bumblee: yeah not-speedy and the twins had him located within minutes

Bumblee: he actually seemed impressed 

kentucky fried: even a speedster or a pair of them need to be smart about search patterns to be that quick 

Bumblee: yeah we’ve been working on it in training 

Flycatcher: looks like all that training paid off 

Bumblee: he also gave us some amazing Atlantean food. It was a bit weird to figure out how to eat it on land but eventually we figured out how to turn into a soup. It is delicious 

Giant Squid: it’s vegetarian too, if BB wants to swing by and try some 

green bean: herald you up ?

Harold: yeah I’ll come get you 

Sparrow: Aquaman also had some embarrassing footage of GA so that was fun 

Harold: Jericho just said I can’t unless I take him too 

Bumblee: well Aquaman left a lot and none of us can figure out how to store it so feel free

Icy Dead People: I have a vegan friend who would love trying this out, can I get some for her?

Bumblee: you mean S, right? 

Icy Dead People: yeah her

Bumblee: yeah you can def take some for her 

Orange You Glad: I’m not vegan but I am so interested in Atlantean food can I request a pick up?  

Harold: meet me at the usual place? 

Orange You Glad: thanks 

Orange You Glad: LB, you want me to pick some up for you?

Bug Lady: pls no no food 

Bumblee: you okay LB? 

Bug Lady: stomach bug. Caught it at school 

Cy’s Your Guy: oof. Feel better soon LB

Underscorer: yeah multiple of my classmates have gotten it too 

marathon monkey: yeah queen bee said she got it a few days ago 

Pawsome: my best friend is out sick too 

Carapace: I have a bad stomach bug myself. I think Rena caught it and gave it to the two of us

Harold: on second thought, maybe I won’t go to Paris 

Orange You Glad: yeah that’s fair 

Sharp As Steel: I am not sick 

Carapace: good for you 

Bumblee: there was something else I wanted to ask about 

Flycatcher: shoot

Sparrow: oh is this about the thing?

Bumblee: yeah 

Bumblee: so Aquaman was talking about working with the other JL members, and he mentioned Batman had developed a plan to take down each of the JL members. Do you/we have something like that with the other titans?

Flycatcher: oh that. Okay. 

Cy’s Your Guy: it looks like Rob’s taking a minute to type so I’ll get the tl;dr version: of course we do 

Bumblee: good

Flycatcher:  no, I don’t have a list of everyone’s weaknesses on a computer buried somewhere, that’s a security concern. But I do have ideas how to handle it if something happens where we end up in a situation like Blood again. It is a big concern - I’ve already fought mind controlled titans, magical versions of my teammates, and other copycats, so it’s not like I don’t trust you guys

Bug Lady: I’ve had to fight Chat while he was mind controlled so I get it

Flycatcher: plus like Star has a sister with similar powers, or if we had to deal with an Atlantean, or a ghost, etc 

Icy Dead People: oh good because I’ve been mind controlled into doing bad things and it sucked  

Flycatcher: also, a lot of the same weaknesses I’d use to take someone down are the weaknesses I am aware of when watching someone’s back

Attempted Murder: you know, if you slowed down and actually read the chat, you would realize that you don’t need to defend your choice 

Bumblee: especially not to us. We remember Blood

Luting in the Streets: I literally possess people so I understand the risk 

Flycatcher: oh okay then 

Flycatcher: as Cyborg said, the tl;dr is that we have plans if anyone ends up under mind control, or has an evil clone, or an evil sister, and it’d be appreciated if the other teams has plans in place for us 

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah I’ve had my tech stolen, Star has an evil sister, BB once downloaded a virus into my brain that made me eat anything. We’ve all had our judgements affected by one thing or another. 

Bumblee: wait BB did what now? 

green bean: heh yeah i was hoping that had been forgotton 

Cy’s Your Guy: nah you’re good, everything’s forgiven 

Bumblee: I still have questions 

Sparrow: eat anything? Like, metal, rocks, furniture?

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah I ended up in the infirmary after because most of it was indigestible 

Sparrow: ew 

Cy’s Your Guy: yeah it wasn’t pleasant

Notes:

As for what Robin’s plan of revenge on Cyborg is… i have absolutely no clue

Chapter 30: Chapter 28: Miraculous Titans

Notes:

kentucky fried: also i swear im not the one changing your username i dont have this level of commitment to the bit
Red Tail: you are nothing but committed to the bit

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Team Miraculous

Like A Good Neigh-bor: okay I am officially confused

Chat-aclysm: I have a few questions myself

Sharp As Steel: I think I need to apologize for letting my identity slip again today

Lucky Charm: you’re good Ryuko, it was an intense situation and at least it was to one of your team mates, even if it was the one who can’t keep a secret

Queen Bee: hey! 

Lucky Charm: am I wrong?

Queen Bee: no 

Queen Bee: iknowbuthey.png 

Lucky Charm: anyways the tl;dr is Queen Bee and Ryuko ended up switching miraculouses out of necessity 

Like A Good Neigh-bor: so Queen Dragon was Queen Bee and Abeille Ryuko?

Lucky Charm: yes 

Queen Bee: it was fun, actually, getting into the dirt and fighting like that, instead of having a distance weapon 

Sharp As Steel: and having to hang back like that and use a distance weapon was a good challenge for me 

Lucky Charm: both of you did good

major scales: this is your friendly neighborhood snake hero slash mom friend telling everyone to go to bed

Lucky Charm: Viperion is right. I’m going to go to bed, and when I wake up, everyone else better have at least tried to sleep


Direct Messages

Marinette: that includes you, rena

Alya: as soon as I’m done with this blog post 

Marinette: the blog can wait 

Alya: so can sleep

Marinette: alya 

Marinette: go

Marinette: to

Marinette: bed

Alya: alright alright I’m going 

Alya: night babe 


Titans General Chat 

Icy Dead People: ok team miraculous is asleep after that last akuma. What miraculous would you all use if you had a chance 

Icy Dead People: I think I would like the horse miraculous, if I was still alive. I’ve heard he can even go to space with it

Red Tail: space is cool 

Cy’s Your Guy: space is very cool. Especially when you have more than a few minutes warning to prepare to go to space for the first time 

Red Tail: but I think the dragon would be cooler. Turning into lightning, or wind? 

Bushido: I agree with Robin. Ryuko also has the better weapon 

Bushido: at least, I am assuming that was Robin

Red Tail: yeah it’s me KF is just running out of ideas

kentucky fried: unfortunately for my parents i never run out of ideas 

kentucky fried: also i swear im not the one changing your username i dont have this level of commitment to the bit 

Red Tail: you are nothing but committed to the bit 

Attempted Murder: I like the bee miraculous. The ability to freeze an opponent, even for a limited amount of time, would be nice.

Cy’s Your Guy: I think Rena’s powers are cool, illusions are super useful 

Bumblee: I feel like I’m supposed to say the bee, for obvious reasons, but I like the butterfly. I think it would be a really good power in the right hands 

Giant Squid: an old story I heard growing up had someone with a source of magic similar to the miraculous, but it was octopus themed. Gave the wielder the ability to free themselves or anyone else from physical bounds. Showed up to a shipwreck hoping for human survivors, ended up rescuing some Atlanteans stuck in the wreckage. 

Red Tail: cool

marathon monkey: cool 

marathon monkey: do you think there’s a shark miraculous? 

Red Tail: I thought Team Miraculous all went to sleep after that Akuma? 

marathon monkey: maybe idk 

marathon monkey: im not in paris atm

marathon monkey: and i havent had the chance to check my phone all day

Giant Squid: where are you?

marathon monkey: doing civilian life stuff 

marathon monkey: not anhthing as fun as being a hero or as important as being there for lb or my civilian friends who are stressed from hm but my parents were being persistent 

Icy Dead People: parents can be like that sometimes 

Sparrow: I would choose the bee. As an archer, have the bad guys continue to move around is a pain

Red Star: I think the turtle miraculous would be nice. The power to shield others instead of just being able to fight off evil.

Argent: I’d say CN’s powers are cool. Instead of having to figure out how to hack or dispose of weapons, we could destroy them with one touch 

green bean: monkeys are cool 

green bean: also the idea of having a bad guy in the middle of some complex scheme about to use their charged attacks and whacking them in the face with a banana peel and ruining it all is fun 

marathon monkey: def is 

Pink Starburst: I agree with friend Red Star! So many injuries and damage comes from debris when fighting, it would be nice to put up a shield. Especially one that can stay static as opposed to Raven’s, which require a lot of concentration 

Red Star: Jinx is right, being called “friend Red Star” is nice 

Pink Starburst: we are friends, yes? 

Red Star: I have always considered you a friend, but it’s good to know that you feel the same 

Pink Starburst: of course I do <3 <3 <3

Catfighter Supreme: I need no miraculous. But the octopus one would be useful occasionally

Hot n Cold: I would love a more specific power like CN’s cataclysm. Target something specific instead of just shooting fire and hope I don’t burn anything important 

Ravager: I agree with Star and Star 

Ravager: star^2 

Luting in the Streets: I think illusions would be good. Distract an opponent without risking yourself or even having to hurt them 

Harold: I’m with Argent. I’ve had to send so many miscellaneous weapons into space but I think just destroying them would work better 

marathon monkey: i really want to know what a shark miraculous would be now 

-

Bug Lady: just caught up with the chat and I think it’s hilarious that none of you picked the ladybug 

Bumblee: the ladybug looks difficult you can keep it



Notes:

Brought to you by popular request

Chapter 31: Chapter 29: Alien Attack

Summary:

green bean: dude sometimes i forget youre like actually a ghost and not just someone who got ghost powers in a lab accident or something
Icy Dead People: I mean, it wasn’t not because of a lab accident

Notes:

Nicknames:
kentucky fried: Kid Flash
green bean: Beast Boy
Icy Dead People: Phantom
Sparrow: Speedy
Bug Lady: Ladybug
Catfighter Supreme: Panthera
Secret Santa: Kole
Hot n Cold: Hotspot
Harold: Herald
marathon monkey: Roi Singe

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Bustier’s Homeroom (Chloe DNI)

Max (and Markov): does anyone have eyes on Alya?

Alya: don’t worry Max I’m not off chasing footage of the current alien attack 

Max (and Markov): pressxtodoubt.png 

Marinette: I have eyes on her, can confirm. We’re working on homework 

Alix: the world might be ending and you’re doing homework? 

Marinette: we don’t want to get behind this early in the semester 

Alix: there’s aliens! 

Nino: stop encouraging her

Marinette: this isn’t even the first alien attack we’ve witnessed 

Alix: yeah but: aliens! 

Rose: I do hope everyone is staying safe! Remember to listen to local authorities as conditions develop!


Titans General Chat 

kentucky fried: this titan thing is weird

kentucky fried: uncle f is off saving the world from an alien invasion and im down here saving not even a dozen from being burned alive because heat waves genius plan backfired

green bean: i feel you dude. one of the battles is close to jump so star and raven are helping keep debris from hitting us. meanwhile im stuck in the tower with rob and cy trying to figure out what mad mod is doing 

green bean: so far all he’s done is make me personally see in black and white 

Icy Dead People: I’m at dinosaur island working with Skulker today because some fruit loop has decided to try to raise an army of ghost dinosaurs 

Sparrow: Titans East spent the morning helping out up north in Casino City where a tidal wave from debris hit some touristy crowded location and now the rest of the team gets to fight the biker spaceship gang while I’m stuck in the tower with a broken arm

Sparrow: GA is up there fighting aliens and I got defeated by a support beam

Bug Lady: we had a ten year old get akumatized because he was a JL fan and HM convinced him that if he stole our miraculouses he could join them in the battle 

Bug Lady: when I deakumatized him I told him that he could be a hero like the JL with time, but he had to do a good job at school and be kind to his schoolmates and family. His mom seemed to like me telling him that

green bean: ive given that speech a few times always feels a bit hypocritical when im so bad at school

Bug Lady: what feels hypocritical to me is telling others to keep up with their chores and help their parents out, when I’m chronically behind on my chores 

Icy Dead People: told a kid once “be careful around electrical equipment or you’ll end up like me” and I don’t think his parents appreciated that 

Sparrow: oh my god phantom 

Bug Lady: lol that’s horrible 

green bean: dude sometimes i forget youre like actually a ghost and not just someone who got ghost powers in a lab accident or something 

Icy Dead People: I mean, it wasn’t not because of a lab accident 

Catfighter Supreme: in regards to kf’s point earlier, I spent most of the day battling a giant robot to save a town of 25. Got a brief glimpse of Superman as he saved a plane with double that amount of people

green bean: was this another of the totally not lex corp robots

Catfighter Supreme: yes 

Bug Lady: wait what does Lexcorp want in a small village like that?

Catfighter Supreme: natural resources, land, chances to try out his robots

Secret Santa: we had a big piece of debris land near us and spent the entire morning keeping Dr Light from it 

green bean: dude i couldve sworn dr light was in jail 

Secret Santa: he is now 

green bean: also notspeedy i will say that getting people out of massive ruins of buildings that will fall on you if you breath wrong is a lot harder than shooting an alien from afar in the open sky 

Sparrow: thanks 

kentucky fried: ugh apparently the first responders in central are understaffed because of the alien thing and heat wave broke out of custody ill be back 

Hot n Cold: need help from someone who can take the heat?

kentucky fried: not necessarily but maybe itll demoralize him so sure

Harold: we’re coming over where do you want us to meet you?

kentucky fried: same place as usual 

Supreme Catfighter: you better be doing this to help your fellow titans out and not to get out of fighting the next robot that appears 

green bean: good news! the black and white thing is wearing out and im starting to see in colors

green bean: the bad news is that a bunch of birds are attacking the tower so i have to go help handle that 

green bean: nvm apparently cy already had a security system specifically for birds

marathon monkey: at least you all get to do something im still stuck outside of paris 

green bean: now the birds are attacking somewhere else gtg 

Sparrow: I feel your pain Roi 

marathon monkey: i feel yours broken bones suck

kentucky fried: hey panthera 

Catfighter Supreme: yes Kid Flash? 

kentucky fried: can hotspot help me out next time heat wave tries something it was hilarious watching his face drop when he realized hotspot was immune to his heat gun 

Catfighter Supreme: if he’s willing and not busy then sure

green bean: dude did you get a video

kentucky fried: no sorry 



Notes:

Until next time!

Chapter 32: Chapter 30: A Big Missed Steak

Summary:

Red Robin. Yum.: what do you call an alligator in a vest?
Attempted Murder: not you too
Red Robin. Yum.: an investigator

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

Pawsome: happy punday Monday/Sunday!

Attempted Murder: oh gods

Pawsome: did you hear about the guy that got hit in the head with a can of soda?

Pawsome: he’s lucky it was a soft drink 

green bean: i cant believe i got fired from the calendar factory 

green bean: all i did was take a day off

Attempted Murder: boo

Icy Dead People: two fish are in a tank. one turns to the other and says, “how do I drive this thing?” 

kentucky fried: i dont trust russian dolls theyre so full of themselves 

Red Robin. Yum.: what do you call an alligator in a vest?

Attempted Murder: not you too 

Red Robin. Yum.: an investigator 

Icy Dead People: how do you throw a space party? You planet 

green bean: what do you call a pig that does karate? a pork chop! 

Guy’s Your Cy: becoming a vegetarian is a big missed steak 

Guy’s Your Cy: hold up a minute 

Bug Lady: sigh 

Bug Lady: I had a joke about amnesia, but I forgot what it was

marathon monkey: i tried to catch some fog. i missed 

Guy’s Your Cy: hey rob I’ve been locked out of changing my nickname 

Red Robin. Yum.: how strange 

Pink Starburst: how do trees access the internet? They must log in! 

green bean: nice one star 

Pawsome: I once did a performance about puns. It was a play on words 

green bean: what did the duck say when the waiter gave him his check? Put it on my bill 

Red Star: I took a photo of a field of wheat. It was grainy 

Carapace: I love my puns but I’m struggling to think of some in English 

Pawsome: I turtlelly get that 

Giant Squid: what did the crab say when it finally got back to the ocean? Long time no sea! 

green bean: why did the fish cross the ocean? to get to the other tide! 

Red Robin. Yum.: meh 

Guy’s Your Cy name changed to Cy’s Your Guy 

green bean: dont be salty about my ocean puns 

Pawsome: I sea what you did there 

Cy’s Your Guy name changed to Guy’s Cy Your 

Guy’s Cy Your: ????

Icy Dead People: pun already used. Go directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. 

Pink Starburst: I do not understand? 

Icy Dead People: oh it’s a reference to a board game called monopoly 

Pink Starburst: I see

Pink Starburst: or I guess I should say, I sea

Attempted Murder: and now you’ve gone and corrupted Starfire. Good job

The Underscorer: can February March? No, but April May

Pawsome: what do you give a sick lemon? Lemon aid! 

Bug Lady: when does bread go bad? When you yeast expect it to 

Pawsome: wow LB, you’re on a roll! 

Pink Starburst: because a roll is a type of bread, yes? 

Pawsome: yep 

Bug Lady: you butter be taking notes, Chat 

The Underscorer: I’m really frustrated - I can’t remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, and 500 in Roman numerals. Really, IM LIVID

Attempted Murder: okay that one’s not bad 

Pink Starburst: and Roman numerals are? 

Red Robin. Yum.: they’re a different way of writing numbers. I is one, II is two, V is five, IV is four, etc 

Red Robin. Yum.: so I = 1, M = 1000, LI = 51, VI = 6, and D = 500

Pink Starburst: I see 

Pink Starburst: did you know that, no matter how hard you push an envelope, it will always remain stationary? 

green bean: why couldn’t the bicycle stand on its own? cause it was two tired!

Attempted Murder: these jokes are making me tired

Icy Dead People: when a clock gets hungry, it goes back four seconds 

The Underscorer: there are 10 types of people in the world. Those who get binary, and those who don’t.

Red Robin. Yum.: lol nice 

Guy’s Cy Your: lol nice 

Sparrow: I think I’m with Raven on this 

Bug Lady: bakers aren’t always broke, but they usually knead dough 

Red Robin. Yum.: I should have been scared when my flashlight’s batteries died, but I was delighted 

Giant Squid: I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something 

Carapace: okay I’ve got one

Carapace: my only plan for today is to get my glasses fixed. Then I’ll see what happens 

Luting in the Streets: youreunderarrest.png 

Pink Starburst: what language is that sign, please? 

Luting in the Streets: it’s a quarter rest, a musical symbol 

Pink Starburst: I see. And that makes the stick figure under “a rest” 

Luting in the Streets: exactly 

Pink Starburst: it is like when Beast Boy holds the salt shaker over Raven’s head and says she’s “under assault” 

Luting in the Streets: basically yeah

Pawsome: lol 

Carapace: what is a sad thursday called in paris? A tra-jeudi 

Red Robin. Yum.: lol 

Icy Dead People: I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop at any time. 

Red Robin. Yum.: I was told I had Type A blood, but it was a Type O 

kentucky fried: class trip to the soda factory. i hope theres no pop quiz

green bean: energizer bunny arrested, charged with battery 

Pawsome: hey LB how do I look? 

Bug Lady: with your eyes, chat 

Red Robin. Yum.: I support farming. You could even say I’m a 

Red Robin. Yum.: protractor.png

Attempted Murder: okay you all want a joke? 

green bean: wait raven you know a joke? 

Pink Starburst: yes please! 

Icy Dead People: sure 

Red Robin. Yum.: go for it 

Guy’s Cy Your: this should be good

Attempted Murder: okay. This is not a pun but it’s a good joke. But it’s a long one so don’t interrupt me

Attempted Murder: so a man was hiking up a mountain, when he heard this music. It was the most beautiful music he had ever heard. He followed the music to the monastery, where a monk greeted him. The man asked the monk about the music.

Red Robin. Yum.: oh I hate this joke

green bean: dude shush 

Attempted Murder: the man explained that he absolutely had to know what the source of this music was. “Sorry,” the monk said, “it’s a secret only for the monks of this monastery.” “But I have to know!” the man argued. “The only way to know is to become a monk,” the monk replied. 

Attempted Murder: “Okay,” the man said, “how do I become a monk?” “First,” the monk replied, “you must count every grain of rice in each bag of rice.” There were a dozen bags of rice, each as big as a person, but the man did what the monk said. 

Attempted Murder: next, the monk led the man to a field, and told him to count every blade of grass. After that, he handed the man a dictionary, and told him to count every word within. Finally, the monk gave the man his final task - to sit in one position on the top of the mountain from sunrise to sunrise, a full twenty four hours, without moving.

Pawsome: mjpopcorn.gif

Attempted Murder: the man hiked to the very top of the mountain, through the night, to reach the spot by sunrise. And he sat there, not eating, drinking, or talking, from sunrise to sunrise.

Attempted Murder: when sunrise came the next day, the monk congratulated the man on finishing the trials and walked back to the monastery with him.

Attempted Murder: the whole monastery celebrated the newest monk, from the moment he came back from the mountain top to sunset that night. Once the celebration was over, the man approached the monk.

Attempted Murder: “Now, may I learn what the source of that music is?” The man asked.

Attempted Murder: “You may,” the monk replied. “Follow me.” 

Attempted Murder: the monk led the man down to the back of the monastery, past the kitchens, past the storage rooms, and into a winding hallway that continued towards the heart of the mountain. They descended staircases made of the very stone of that mountain, and arrived at a beautifully carved door. 

Attempted Murder: “Behind these doors is your answer,” the monk said. So the man took a deep breath, stepped forward, and opened the door. 

Guy’s Cy Your: so what’s behind the door?

green bean: yeah you can’t leave us hanging like that!

Attempted Murder: sorry, I can’t tell you. You’re not monks. 

green bean: flippingtables.gif

Notes:

None of these jokes are original. I’m not that creative lol

Chapter 33: Chapter 31: Sportsball

Summary:

Orange You Glad: had a moment of surprise that people still play american football when it’s obviously such an akuma risk. And then I remembered
kentucky fried: the 21st night of september?

Notes:

Nicknames:
Guy Cy’s Your - Cyborg
green bean - Beast Boy
Giant Squid - Aqualad
Red Robin. Yum. - Robin
kentucky fried - Kid Flash
Icy Dead People - Phantom
Catfighter Supreme - Panthera
Bug Lady - Ladybug
Attempted Murder - Raven
Bumblee - Bumblebee
The Underscorer - Pegasus
Orange You Glad - Rena Rouge
Pink Starburst - Starfire
Sharp As Steel - Ryuko
marathon monkey - Roi Singe

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat:

Guy Cy’s Your: ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!!!! 


Guy Cy’s Your: I’m going to take that as a no 

green bean: american tackle football scares me 

Giant Squid: I just can’t get into any land sports 

Red Robin. Yum.: you know I’ll watch it with you but I can’t say I’m that excited for it 

kentucky fried: most sports are too slow for me

Icy Dead People: I despise football for no other reason than the fact that Plasmius enjoys it

Catfighter Supreme: I love American football! Also ice hockey and rugby. Can’t seem to find any good channels that show it here

Guy Cy’s Your: ooh I can help you set that up 

Bug Lady: I think we’ve established that I don’t do sports 

Attempted Murder: football. So excited. woot woot.

Icy Dead People: people who say you can’t read tone in a text message have clearly never chatted with Raven 

Bumblee: I can come over and watch it with you sparky, I love a good game

Guy Cy’s Your: aww thanks 

Guy Cy’s Your name changed to Sparky Sparky Boom Man

Sparky Sparky Boom Man: I’m going to assume whoever did that is also the person responsible for waking me up at 2 AM with Mr Roboto 

Sparky Sparky Boom Man: for three nights in a row

The Underscorer: historically, most mischievousness in this chat has been attributed to Kid Flash

kentucky fried: not you to

The Underscorer: I am merely stating the facts 

kentucky fried: will i ever be believed innocent

Red Robin. Yum.: no 

Orange You Glad: had a moment of surprise that people still play american football when it’s obviously such an akuma risk. And then I remembered 

kentucky fried: the 21st night of september? 

Orange You Glad: that too

Pink Starburst: please what occurred on the 21st day of September?

kentucky fried: its a song reference

kentucky fried: https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ?si=NXcUovmnMNztAlsJ

Pink Starburst: sorry to disappoint you, but I do know what a rickroll is 

kentucky fried: nvm then 

Sparky Sparky Boom Man: it is from a song, though. Look up “September” by Earth, Wind, and Fire

Pink Starburst: thank you friend Cyborg <3

Sparky Sparky Boom Man: you are quite welcome, Star

Icy Dead People: heads up I’m about to head back to the states, if anyone wants me to pick up any cool souvenirs from Europe 

Red Star: Phantom was a great help in finishing the snowman problem 

Icy Dead People: my pleasure. Had to get out of Amity anyways with all the GIW around 

Red Robin. Yum.: yeah someone needs to do something about the GIW

Carapace: rena I’m so glad I’m not the only one who keeps forgetting other cities don’t have akuma problems 

Bug Lady: I do that all the time 

Sharp As Steel: so do I 

marathon monkey: it was a prob for me when i was out of the city 

green bean: dude control freak just reappeared 

green bean: i guess he has a grudge against sports? 

green bean: anyways tune in to espn to see the titans take him on on live tv 

Giant Squid: shouldn’t you be helping them, not texting us?

green bean: i was in the bathroom when it happened so i didnt get sucked into the tv this time

Bug Lady: this time????



Notes:

Anyways happy football day for anyone who observes it

Chapter 34: Chapter 32: Fixer Upper

Summary:

Red Robin. Yum.: whatever you want to say, say it. This is a no judgement zone
Attempted Murder: unless you’re Beast Boy

Notes:

TW: brief mention of addiction/Speedy’s backstory at the end, after the second line break
Nicknames:
Red Robin. Yum. - Robin
Bug Lady - Ladybug
Icy Dead People - Phantom
Bumblee/Bee for Best - Bumblebee
Friend Jinx/Pink Hair and Pronouns - Jinx
Attempted Murder - Raven
green bean/asparagus - Beast Boy
Luting in the Streets - Jericho
Sparrow/Teenage Human Archery Turtle - Speedy
Sparky Sparky Boom Man/Squad One Geek Man - Cyborg
Pink Starburst/Star Light, Star Bright - Starfire
Orange You Glad - Rena Rouge
Rookie Monster - Ravager
marathon monkey - Roi Singe

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Titans General Chat

5 new messages 

Red Robin. Yum.: so what you’re saying is, if there was a gas attack, you’d be able to help?

Bug Lady: any of team miraculous could help, as long as I had a chance to get the potions to them beforehand 

Red Robin. Yum.: good to know

Icy Dead People: can we circle back to the train in space part? 

Bumblee: I’m more interested in the underwater part. Aquaman and Aqualad keep trying to drag the team out to sea and I don’t like getting wet

marathon monkey: i volunteer 

Bug Lady: of course you do 

Sparrow: Jinx you’ve been typing a while, everything alright? 

Friend Jinx: yeah I’m fine it’s just 

Red Robin. Yum.: whatever you want to say, say it. This is a no judgement zone 

Attempted Murder: unless you’re Beast Boy 

Red Robin. Yum.: tbf bb gets even more aggravated when you don’t pick on him 

green bean: yeah it freaks me out i always worry that i actually made you mad

Luting in the Streets: we are here to listen to you, Jinx 

Friend Jinx: okay so does anyone else feel like we’re handling the big villains and such but not actually fixing anything? Like the real problems that are causing this type of stuff? 

Friend Jinx: maybe it’s just me having been in their shoes before idk 

Red Robin. Yum.: yeah literally all the time 

green bean: yep 

Luting in the Streets: I do feel like that sometimes 

Sparrow: oh yeah like all the time 

Red Star: I understand the feeling

Friend Jinx: oh 

Red Robin. Yum.: there’s a part of me that keeps thinking we need to do more to help the actual problems in our community, and then whenever I try to do that, control freak or mad mob or some other annoying villain pops up and I have to go deal with them instead 

Attempted Murder: the good news is that Jump City has a lot of other, non-hero people that are willing to take on that challenge, provided that we continue to protect them from the annoying pop up villains  

Red Robin. Yum.: that’s a good point. No good change is going to come if we let the world get destroyed, or turned back to the sixties, or whatever 

Friend Jinx: that’s a good way to look it at

Red Robin. Yum.: if you have any ideas yourself on things we can be doing, let us know 

Friend Jinx: I do not or I would already be doing it 

Bumblee: this doesn’t apply to everyone, of course, but sometimes leading by example really does work, especially if you’re from a group that doesn’t get a lot of representation. Like people who’ve had a freak accident that gave them permanent wings.

Sparky Sparky Boom Man: yeah, I’ve had several people with prosthetics come up to tell me I’m a role model, and I’m always like ???. I’m just being me.

green bean: dude youre like naturally awesome 

Red Robin. Yum.: agreed 

Sparky Sparky Boom Man: awww thanks 

Pink Starburst: I have never tried to do the leading by example but Jump City has become one of the most welcoming cities to aliens 

Orange You Glad: LB has this thing where she’ll swing by a charity or something just long enough to get photos of her there and suddenly everyone’s invested in it 

Bug Lady: it works surprisingly well, especially when I get can the Ladyblogger on it

Icy Dead People: never underestimate the power of a throw-away line to a reporter

Friend Jinx: takingnotes.gif 

Red Robin. Yum.: I’m surprised KF hasn’t talked to you about it

Friend Jinx: he’s been distracted 


Dick and His Del-tones

Pink Hair and Pronouns: img8876.png 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: said distraction

Squad One Geek Man: oooh is he trying out those new wheel designs? 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: yep

Pink Hair and Pronouns: not to be a bi disaster on main but he looks so cute when he’s focusing 

Star Light, Star Bright: I did not know you identified as bi

Pink Hair and Pronouns: oh yeah Bee and I used to date 

Squad One Geek Man: wait what? 

asparagus: wait you knew each other before becoming titans?

Pink Hair and Pronouns: yeah? We both studied at hive 

asparagus: oh right

Pink Hair and Pronouns: we were both contenders for top student for a while, and somehow ended up doing a school rivals to lovers arc 

Attempted Murder: nice 

Star Light, Star Bright: so why did you break up? 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: hive leadership changed. She was upset about it, I wasn’t. 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: we actually broke up a few weeks before Cyborg went undercover 

Red Robin. Yum.: so was Cyborg your rebound? 

Pink Hair and Pronouns: lol


Green Arrows 1# Hate Club

Teenage Human Archery Turtle:  okay but wrt to the conversation in gen chat, I’ve also got a charity I’d like to help somehow 

Rookie Monster: aren’t most charities scams?

Teenage Human Archery Turtle: some are, some aren’t 

Bee for Best: what charity? 

Teenage Human Archery Turtle: SC’s teenage recovery program. I’ve been touching base with some of the facility there and it seems like a really good program

Teenage Human Archery Turtle: beats anything star city had, at least

Bee for Best: when it comes to addiction, we’ll follow your lead 

Teenage Human Archery Turtle: thank you 



Notes:

Sorry for the lack of updates! Had an all-reading, no-writing week.

Chapter 35: Interlude 2: Should Old Acquaintance Be Forgot?

Notes:

Another interlude to introduce a few more characters.

Chapter Text

Interlude 2: Should Old Acquaintance Be Forgot?

The French prison looked much like other prisons Jinx had seen, just with more security.

A lot more security. 

She was a legit visitor this time, with Robin by her side, but all the security made her nervous. She had been a thief, once, and then a villain. Comparatively, she hadn’t been a good guy for very long. 

The prison was busy, having had Parisian prisoners transferred out to it to avoid akumatizations. Most of the lower-level Brotherhood of Evil members had ended up here. 

Madame Rouge was in a facility specifically designed for shapeshifters.

Their escort led them to an empty room, saying that he’ll come back for Jinx in a moment, and disappeared.

“Nervous?” Robin asked. 

“A little,” Jinx admitted.

She had never expected to feel so comfortable around the titans. She hadn’t expected them to accept her so quickly, even when Wally had assured her they would. But now they almost felt like family - people she could count on, depend on, and also people she enjoyed being around. 

And now she was here to extend the same chance to her first family. 

It would be the first time she saw them since Paris. It felt like years. 

Jinx had updated her look since then. Raven had helped her create a neck guard in the same style as her original collar, just high enough on her chest to protect her neck. Ladybug had made some suggestions on the dress - mostly ways to fit surprise pockets, but Jinx had added a purple belt with a hexagon clasp and brought the collar up flush with the neck guard. Robin had gifted her a pair of black fingerless gloves and some sturdier lace-up combat boots. 

She did keep her same signature hairstyle. 

“Prisons used to make me nervous, too,” Robin said. 

“Really?” Jinx asked. “Why?”

Robin didn’t get a chance to answer, because the escort had returned. 

“This way, please,” he said. 


It had been Robin who had helped her organize this, and Robin who’d volunteered to go with, but Jinx entered the room alone. 

Gizmo was on the other side of the glass. He huffed in annoyance when he saw Jinx.

“Finally remembered the rest of us?” He asked.

“Sorry for disappearing,” Jinx said. “I had some thinking to do.” 

“But did you have to do it with the stinking titans?” Gizmo asked. 

Jinx shrugged. “Go big or go home. But I wanted to check in on you.”

“I’m fine,” Gizmo said. “Not my first time in jail. These snot eaters won’t be holding me in here for long.”

“It’s been months.”

“I’m being transferred in a few weeks. I don’t want to break out too close to Hawkgoblin. Blegh.”

“Fair enough,” Jinx said. “I have another option, though.”

“Of course you do,” Gizmo said. “Probably feel guilty about leaving us to rot in jail.”

“I was the reason the brotherhood recruited you.” 

“Yeah, but you’re not the reason the brotherhood ended up being a bunch of grass-brained, snot-nosed, idiot geezers. I mean, how much of an embarrassment do you have to be to be taken down by Beast Boy.” 

Jinx frowned. “He had help.”

Gizmo huffed. “We still outnumbered them. Stupid idiot melon-headed morons.”

“The point is,” Jinx continued, “I have a way out for you.”

“Does it involve the stinking titans?” Gizmo asked.

“No,” Jinx said, “but it involves a lot of computers.”

“I’m listening.” 


Mammoth was next.

“I’m fine,” he said with a shrug, “already have an escape plan.” 

Yeah, Jinx knew. Mammoth wasn’t exactly subtle with his planning.

“Thanks for checking in,” Mammoth said. “Next time, bring pie.”


Billy Numerous also had an escape plan.

If Jinx was in there with them, she would have been frustrated by the three individual escape plans. It really wasn’t that hard to coordinate. But without her there to force cooperation, no one was working together.

She had been so driven then. Everything she did had to be perfect - because she had to be perfect, had to be the best.   

That had changed. 

It didn’t matter as much to her what she would be in five or ten years from now - not when just last week, she was able to save a family from a house fire with a few well-placed flicks of magic. She didn’t care if everyone knew her name when Cyborg always remembered her favorite foods and Ladybug brought her the macaroons she loved and Iris knew her coffee order. It didn’t matter if she was the smartest person in her classes when she was doing homework with Wally after missing class or listening to Barry explain his forensics work.

It was like she had spent her whole life trying to prove that she had a right to exist - a reason to exist. To prove whoever her parents were that they were wrong to abandon her, to show up every teacher that saw her as another problem child, every foster family that blamed her for their own issues. To show up Slade, who set her up for failure, and Blood, who had blamed her for it. 

And then she’d had a moment, when Madame Rouge had taken credit for something Jinx had done, where she had seen her future. A future of constantly looking for validation from villains, of constantly being walked over and talked down to. 

And she decided she had had enough of that.


After Billy Numerous was See-More.

“You look nice,” See-More said. 

“Thanks,” Jinx replied. “I wanted to apologize.”

See-More frowned. “What for?”

“I dragged you into the team, and then dragged the team into the Brotherhood of Evil, and then left,” Jinx replied. “And now you’re in jail, and I’m not.”

“You didn’t drag me into anything,” See-More replied.  “I chose to follow you. I continued with the brotherhood even after you left. I’ve never felt like I had much of choice, with being a bad guy, but not because of anything you did.”

“Well, I’m giving you a choice,” Jinx said. “I have a few ways you can get out of jail, if you want to.” 

See-More leaned forward. “Sounds better than waiting for Mammoth’s escape plan. What do I need to do?”


Join the Titans was not one of the answers Jinx had prepared. 

It seemed wrong, to ask them to risk themselves for a chance to stay out of jail, and Robin had helped her find several other options. Gizmo would be working with a technology company that was probably a part of Wayne Industries. She’d had similar ideas for the rest of the team, but-

But See-More had wanted to join her. 

He didn’t trust the other opportunities - See-More had dealt with a lot of crap, being so visibly different. But he said he was willing to try with the Titans, if they had accepted Jinx (and Cyborg, Raven, Bumblebee, etc). 

And where See-More went, Kyd Wykkyd usually followed.

“You don’t seem surprised,” Jinx commented, when she told Robin what happened.

“I’m not,” Robin replied. “A lot of the students at H.I.V.E. couldn’t find their way in normal society, but the Titans aren’t exactly normal.”

Jinx nodded. “That’s about what See-More said.”

“Do you think they’ll want to stay with you,” Robin asked, “or would they be okay with assisting another team?” 

“What did you have in mind?”



Notes:

So yeah, updates will be whenever. FFH takes priority right now, but hopefully this much more lighthearted story will help balance everything out.