Light and The Narcissus

by DgitalDolli

Summary:

It’s 1966 and a young 11 year old Narcissa is walking to the platform 9 3/4 with her older sisters. The eldest of the three, Bellatrix, runs ahead into the “wall” first. Next is the second sister, Andromeda, she runs after Bellatrix. Narcissa hesitates as her turn to run through the wall arrives, but there’s no time for that. She needs to go, a new chapter of life is waiting for her.

Notes:

Hiii this is my first ever fic. I will warn you, I’m in deep shit. I got caught with a cart at school and I tried to commit suicide a day later. Leading to me getting my devices took and using my grandmother’s iPad to write this. I’m also not supposed to have social media or talk to anyone this entire summer. And this is heavily inspired by “A Love for The Stars” by Tigergirl1223 (I think that’s their name) So uh, Enjoy!

Chapter 1: The Blonde

Notes:

Peek a boo! This work is inspired by “A Love for The Stars.” by Tigergirl1223 (I think that's the name) I'm also having a crisis currently so uhh i’ll try for 2-3k words per chapter.

September 1st, 1966

 

----------------- 

 

The buzzing of the London train station made Narcissa’s stomach churn. It was infested with Muggles who were far too busy in their worlds to notice the children making their way to the nonexistent platform with their owls and large trunks. As Narcissa and her family navigated through the station, her mind began to wander, imagining what life at Hogwarts would be like based on the stories her older sisters had shared with her during the holidays and in their letters. Abruptly, the family stopped, snapping Narcissa out of her daydream. 

 

“Cissy,” called her mother, Druella. “Pay attention, dear. You nearly bumped into your sister.”

 

Narcissa looked up at her older sister, Andromeda, who had neatly curly deep brown hair, unlike their other sister Bellatrix’s jet black hair. “Sorry, Andy,” Narcissa murmured. Andromeda nodded in approval. As their parents shuffled back to give Bellatrix room to go through to the platform, Narcissa and Andromeda followed suit. Bellatrix quickly rushed through the barrier, and Andromeda followed right after. Narcissa couldn't help but stare momentarily, overwhelmed by a blend of emotions.

 

“Narcissa,” her father, Cygnus, called out. “Go on. We don’t have much time left, my dear.” 

 

Narcissa nodded in acknowledgment and gathered all her courage. She stepped back, closed her eyes, and ran through the platform. When she finally opened her eyes, the familiar scene greeted her: kids and teenagers with their parents at the platform, loading the train. She spotted her older sisters a few feet away.

 

“Merlin’s beard! What took you so long?” Andromeda questioned.

 

“It was nothing,” Narcissa replied. The two older sisters looked up as their parents walked through the platform.

 

“Girls, let’s go! You cannot afford to be late getting on the train,” Druella hissed.

 

“Yes, Mother,” the girls responded in unison.

 

Quickly, the sisters said their goodbyes to their parents and boarded the train, finding a nice compartment near the rear. Narcissa watched as her sisters stowed their luggage in the overhead compartments. When it was her turn, she tried to place her luggage above but accidentally dropped a few school supplies in the process. Before she could pick them up, a young man reached down and grabbed them for her. He had beautiful, long platinum blonde hair, striking grey eyes, and a green tie that immediately indicated he was in Slytherin. He placed her items in the overhead compartment. "Thank you, but I really could have done it myself," Narcissa insinuated, attempting to smooth out her clothes and run her fingers through her hair. 

 

"You're welcome, I was certainly just being a gentleman and a helping hand.” He grinned. “But I'm sure anyone would stop to help a girl like you.” He exclaimed. He began walking off to the rear of the train and sat with a few buddies of his own.

 

Narcissa smiled slightly as she watched him walk down the aisle, her cheeks turning a faint shade of pink. She entered the compartment that her sisters had chosen. Andromeda sat by the door, engrossed in her most recent book find, while Bellatrix and Rodolphus were already snogging near the window. For a pair that claimed to hate each other’s guts, they certainly engaged in a lot of actions that suggested the opposite. As Narcissa slid into the compartment and closed the door, she noticed Bellatrix and Rodolphus still locked in their embrace yet no longer snogging. “Finally,” Andromeda murmured. Narcissa took a seat near the window across from Bellatrix and Rodolphus.

 

“You have that look on your face,” Bellatrix sighed.

 

“What look?” Narcissa replied.

 

“Like a boy just complimented you.”

 

Bellatrix wasn’t completely wrong; a boy had indeed complimented her. However, she also wore that expression on her face—like a young girl who has finally caught the attention of the boy she likes. Narcissa didn’t respond to Bellatrix and simply rested her head against the wall.  “What did he look like?” Bellatrix asked.

 

“Can’t you just drop it, Bella?” sighed Andromeda. Bellatrix rolled her eyes and leaned in for another snogging session with Rodolphus. “I can’t do this anymore. I’m going to sit with my friends,”

As soon as she spoke, she left the compartment, leaving Narcissa alone with the couple. Narcissa closed her eyes and tried to block them out as she slowly drifted off to sleep.

 

————————————

 

Narcissa’s eyes drifted open and closed as she heard what she thought was her name. Her head is spinning and she has a headache. The voice she hears gets louder and closer. “Cissy. Cissssy. Cissy!” Narcissa’s eyes drifted open. Her vision is blurry. She sees a tall figure with a bunch of black hair in front of her. “Narcissa!” Her vision returns to its clearness and cleanliness.

Narcissa immediately noticed Bellatrix hovering over her. “Merlin’s beard! I thought you were dead!” she exclaimed. Bellatrix scoffed in addition, “Come on, we’re not that far from Hogwarts. We need to change into our robes.” Narcissa covered her mouth as she let out a small yawn and stood up to follow Bellatrix. “Aww... don’t want to get undressed in front of me?” Rodolphus snickered. “Certainly not, you dog,” Bellatrix retorted. Narcissa couldn’t help but giggle at her sister’s insult as they walked out of the compartment.

They grabbed their robes from their trunks and found Andromeda in another compartment, already changing into her robes.“Is knocking never a thought for you two?” Andromeda asks mockingly. “Not at all,” Bellatrix laughs. Bella and Narcissa then enter the compartment and immediately shut the door, changing out of their original clothes and putting on their school uniforms.

The compartment was silent as the girls changed into their uniforms. “Bella, can I ask you something?” Narcissa finally spoke up.

“Is it a stupid question or a genuine one?” 

“Both…?” 

Another pause filled the compartment as Narcissa hesitated to ask Bellatrix. “Just either ask the question or don’t, Narcissa,” Bellatrix replied flatly “Do you love Rodolphus?” Andromeda was the first to finish putting on her robes and sat down on one side of the seat. Bellatrix sighed. “What makes you think that I do?”

“You’re promised to each other.”

“So? Mother and Father were promised to each other as well.”

Everything went silent once again, and it gnawed at Narcissa. It didn't sit right with her to think that she might face the same fate as her older sister. Bellatrix and Rodolphus had been betrothed since childhood, yet the thought of living such a life consumed her. 

“You don’t believe you’re in love, do you?” Bellatrix's voice suddenly broke into Narcissa's thoughts.

“No, it's nothing like such,” Narcissa replied.

“I’m marrying him out of duty, Narcissa,” Bellatrix added. “It’s simply to extend our family line and uphold my honor. If you're concerned about having the same life I do, don’t be. You and Andy have a chance to marry for love, but it's a slim chance. Mother and Father have high expectations. Just don’t tarnish our name by marrying mud blood… Is that all?” 

“Yes, thank you, Bella,”

Once the girls finished putting on their robes, they walked out of the compartment and made their way back to Rodolphus. When they reached the compartment, they entered and settled into their original seats. The rest of the train ride was quiet, except for the occasional giggle from Bellatrix and laughter from Rodolphus. Narcissa sat in silence, lost in daydreams, while Andromeda became engrossed in her book once again. The sudden jerk of Narcissa's shoulder snapped her out of her trance.

As her older sisters stood and exited the compartment, she followed closely behind. Once the group was off the train, a booming voice echoed through the station. “First year's ovar here!” The man who spoke was extremely large and hairy, which instantly repulsed Narcissa, as well as Bellatrix and Rodolphus. “Ugh… It’s the big hairy oaf.” Bellatrix complained “I still don’t understand why he’s here,” Rodolphus remarked. Andromeda glanced sideways at the pair and slowly moved herself and Narcissa away from them. “That’s Hagrid; he’s the groundskeeper. He usually leads the first years to the boats that take you to the castle,” Andromeda explained. “I’d say he’s one of the kindest adults here.”

 

“He’s very hairy and... big,” Narcissa added.

 

“Well, most people say it’s a birth defect,” Andromeda replied.

 

“Seems like he has a few,”

 

“Cissy!”

 

“I’m just being honest,”

 

Andromeda rolled her eyes. As they moved closer to Hagrid, she began to stray from Narcissa. “I’ll see you after the sorting ceremony. Bye, Cissy!” Andromeda waved goodbye to her younger sister with a smile, and Narcissa did the same. Narcissa walked among the crowd of first-years after only a few feet, they found themselves at the black lake with hundreds of small boats. Narcissa boarded one along with a few other girls and it slowly began to sail off deeper into the lake. Narcissa sat in the front of the boat, as the rest of the girls just sat and talked to one another.The deeper the boat journeyed into the lake, Narcissa couldn’t help but gawk at the beauty of the castle at night. “It’s gorgeous,” she thought. “I’m sure I’ll have a smooth first year.”

Chapter 2: The Blond

Summary:

Narcissa Black is a first-year Hogwarts student eager to be sorted into Slytherin, like her family. She recalls a striking blonde boy she met before the Sorting ceremony. When the Sorting Hat places her in Slytherin, she feels proud, especially as her sisters, surprisingly Bellatrix, offer supportive smiles. She meets some girls and makes new friends, or, maybe not the friend part.

Notes:

Hello! I’m very sorry that it’s taken me a while to post this chapter. I’ve had issues with google docs deleting paragraphs and at some point the whole damn chapter… I’ve also been trying to improve and proofread my writing while trying to not burn myself out. I’m sorry! (Constructive criticism / feedback is ALWAYS welcomed and appreciated)
Things I’d like to point out:
Some of the characters you’ll meet are kind of canon, but we don't get their names in the books so I improvised!

 

 

The first-year students hurried to the Great Hall after Professor McGonagall's speech. For Narcissa, Dumbledore's address felt longer than necessary. As he continued to speak, she tuned him out and drifted into her thoughts. Her mind wandered back to the blonde boy she had met on the train earlier that day. His platinum hair was stunning—almost more beautiful than her own. His eyes were a striking shade of gray, and he had a distinctive scent of mahogany. She was sure there was more to him, but their brief interaction had faded as quickly as it began.

 

“Narcissa Black!”

 

The sound of her name brought her out of her trance. She hurried to the chair with the Sorting Hat and sat down. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath as the hat was placed on her head.

 

“A Black daughter, eh?” The hat spoke. “Hmm…”

 

As the Sorting Hat contemplated her future, Narcissa prayed to the gods to be assigned to Slytherin. Since her family's establishment in the mid-nineteenth century, every member had been sorted into Slytherin. Being placed in any other house would be a disgrace. While she didn't view Ravenclaw as terrible as Hufflepuff or Gryffindor, it still fell short of being Slytherin. Either way, she cannot bear being the only Black to have been sorted into anything else. The Sorting Hat once again spoke up, knocking Narcissa out of her train of thought.

 

“I’ll put you in… Slytherin!” The crowd of students erupted in applause. Narcissa rose from the chair and descended the smaller staircase, maintaining her usual stoic expression. As she approached the Slytherin table, she glanced at her sisters, who were sitting near the door of the Great Hall. Both of them beamed at her with proud and cheerful smiles. She had never seen Bellatrix smile so proudly at her before. A smile spread across Narcissa's face—one resembling a girl who just received the pony she wanted for Christmas. When she reached them, she embraced Andromeda tightly, even more so than she typically would at the end of the school year.

 

After all the first-year students were sorted into their respective houses, the feast began. Narcissa placed only a small amount of food on her plate—a few peas, a thin slice of ham, and a handful of green beans. As she looked down the table, trying to find a familiar face, she suddenly stopped and stared at one particular boy. It was him—the blonde boy from the train—talking with a few of his friends.

 

“See something you like?” Rodolphus smirked. Narcissa nodded toward the boy. The three people sitting near her looked up and noticed him. 

 

“That’s him! That’s the boy who helped me on the train,” she said.

 

“Malfoy...?” Bellatrix groaned disdainfully.

 

“No, absolutely not!” Andromeda added. “He’s just an aristocratic boy who thinks the world revolves around him!”

 

“I never said I was interested in being courted by him,” Narcissa defended herself.

 

“Well, the way you walked into the compartment, it looked like he had recited 'The Song of Solomon,' Chapter Eight, to you,” Bellatrix teased. Narcissa rolled her eyes and spent the rest of the feast picking at her plate. Once the feast ended, the four of them split up: Bellatrix and Rodolphus went off to do who-knows-what, Andromeda joined her "friends"—the same ones Narcissa always wondered about but had never met—and Narcissa followed the crowd of first-years mixed with older students.

 

As she walked down into the dungeons, she felt a bump on her shoulder and turned to look back. “Can you possibly watch where you’re—” she began, only to realize it was Malfoy. He had a faint smirk on his lips and was peering at her from the side of his eyes. “Oh it’s you, my apologies, I had believed you were someone else for a moment.”

 

“So if I weren't me you would’ve said some not very ladylike things?” He grinned. “I'm only toying with you. It’s a pleasurable sight to meet you again.”

 

“It is for me as well,” She added. They’d made it to the Slytherin common room by the time Narcissa had gotten her words out. It was nothing but a stone wall. The prefect shouted out the password, “Leadership!” A stone snake that was a part of the floorboards of the dungeon began to arch and lift, opening a large space with a green hue. The Slytherin common room. 

 

Narcissa and the boy walk into the spacious lounge. A bunch of first-year students chattered and excitement rang through the place. They walk over to a grand window that sits in front of a row of lounge chairs and a couch. “I’m Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy,” Lucius spoke out.

 

“I’m Narcissa Black.”

 

“A Black..?” Lucius questioned. “You… look—”

 

“Nothing like my sisters? Yes, I know…” Narcissa muttered. Lucius went quiet as Narcissa did.

 

“I should be getting to my dorm now. See you, Malfoy,” Narcissa said as she turned away from the window and walked up the grand staircase to the girls’ dormitories. She found a door with her name taped to the frame. After removing the name tag, she entered her dorm and noticed four other first-year girls already settled in. One girl immediately sized her up from head to toe. Narcissa noticed that all the other girls had already claimed their beds, which were in a circle around the room, so she headed straight for her own.

 

One of the girls, who had short, wavy black hair, earth-toned skin, and hazel eyes, walked over to the girl who had been staring at Narcissa. She leaned in and whispered something into the other girl’s ear, casting a sideways glance at Narcissa. Although she noticed this exchange, Narcissa decided not to pay it any mind. 

 

“It’s too early in the school year for me to be involved in petty drama,” she thought. As she unpacked her trunk and organized her belongings in the nightstand, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing.

 

Just then, she felt a tap on her shoulder. Startled, she turned around to find the girl who had been looking at her earlier. “Hi,” the girl said, her voice forced and her smile quite fake.

 

“Hello,” 

 

“My name is Pernilla. What's your name?” 

 

“Narcissa,” Narcissa replied. Pernilla, along with the three other girls in the back, giggled softly. 

 

“Sorry,” Pernilla started to snicker again, “but you have a very pretty name.” 

 

“Thank you,” Narcissa said flatly. 

 

“This is Evelyn,” Pernilla said, pointing to the girl with earth-toned skin and short wavy hair whose bed was across from Pernilla’s. “This is Magnolia,” she continued, pointing to the girl with ivory skin and straight black hair whose bed was directly in front of Narcissa when she entered. “And last but not least, this is Odette,” Pernilla added, indicating Odette’s bed, which was next to Magnolia's, the same as Narcissa's.

 

“Nice to meet you all,” Narcissa added. Pernilla nodded and hummed as she walked away. Another faint sound of giggles nearly broke Narcissa’s usually demure composure. Taking a deep breath, she ignored the girls again and took off her school robes. Still in her outfit from earlier that day, she grabbed one of her nightgowns and headed to their dormitory bathroom. She quickly changed into the nightgown and walked out to see all the girls gathered on Pernilla’s bed. Narcissa didn’t mind them and simply went to her own bed, pulling out one of her most recent reads, To Kill a Mockingbird.

 

“Hey,” Pernilla called out. “We’re doing a bit of roommate bonding. Wouldn’t you fancy joining us?” Magnolia and Odette giggled under their breath.

 

“I’m pretty spent at the moment. I’d like to read some more of my book before going to sleep,” Narcissa responded.

 

“Oh, come on, Narcissa,” Odette whined. “You can stay for just a few minutes.”

 

Narcissa huffed and got out of her bed to walk over to Pernilla’s. She sat on the corner of the bed and leaned against one of the posts.

 

“Okay, let’s start with crushes,” Magnolia giggled.

 

“Crushes?” Narcissa questioned. “We haven't even been here an entire day.”

 

“That’s what you call a corridor crush,” Evelyn chimed in. “They’re crushes you usually only see in the corridors or the Great Hall.”

 

“Ooh!” Pernilla yipped. “Mine’s Malfoy!” Every girl except Narcissa giggled. Narcissa felt her face and hands start to burn, but it quickly faded. She immediately dived into her thoughts. *Why do I feel like this? I don't even like Malfoy… He’s just… a boy.*

 

“Narcissa!” Odette snapped, pulling Narcissa out of her train of thoughts.

 

“Sorry,” Narcissa muttered.

 

“Who’s your crush?” Evelyn asked.

 

“I don’t have one. I’d much rather focus on getting straight O’s this entire year.” The other four girls exchanged knowing smiles, as if there was an inside joke Narcissa didn’t understand. A feeling of unease rose within her as she climbed out of Pernilla’s bed.

 

“I’m going to sleep now. Have a good night,” she said.

 

“Night, Narcissa,” Odette teased, and the rest of the girls giggled. Narcissa didn’t mind, but something inside her gnawed at her. She couldn’t shake the feeling off; the girls’ stares and laughter didn’t help either.

 

 

———————————

The morning arrived, and Narcissa could tell only by the silver alarm clock on her nightstand. She noticed that all the other girls were still sound asleep, which she decided to take advantage of. Grabbing her toothbrush and clothes, she walked into the medium-sized bathroom. After taking a shower and brushing her teeth, she got dressed. 

 

Looking at the clock, she saw that there was about an hour and a half left until breakfast. Narcissa then grabbed a medium black bag and packed it with the school supplies she needed. For the next 20 minutes, she brushed her long blonde hair, making sure it looked perfect.

 

"You’re up early," Evelyn said with a smile, her voice raspy. 

 

"Force of habit," Narcissa replied. "I've always been one to wake early."

 

Evelyn hummed in response and mimicked Narcissa's earlier actions. As Evelyn entered the bathroom, Narcissa exited her dormitory carrying her black bag. She turned a corner and made her way down the Grand Staircase. Once she made it down she sat on the lounge couch by the grand window. She watched as a herd of fish swam by the window.

 

“Cissy,” Narcissa looked up to see Bellatrix walking towards her. “Did you make some new friends already? I’m sure you were up most of the night gossiping with your new roommates.”

 

“I was the first one to sleep,” Narcissa replied.

 

“Typical,” Bellatrix said. She noticed Rodolphus walking towards a lounge chair. “I need to go. I’ll see you at breakfast, Cissy.”

 

“Typical,” Narcissa thought to herself. She grabbed her bag and took out her most recent book. A few minutes later, she made her way to the Great Hall for breakfast. After navigating through the dungeons and turning a few corners, she arrived at the Great Hall. She spotted her sisters and Rodolphus in the same spot they had occupied the night before. She immediately sat down with them, tucked her bag under the bench, and placed a small portion of food on her plate.

 

“Morning, Cissy,” Andromeda said.

 

“Good morning, Andy,” Narcissa responded. “To you as well, Rodolphus.”

 

Rodolphus nodded in response and continued eating, partially listening as Bellatrix ranted about something. “Do you like your roommates?” Andromeda asked.

 

“They certainly are interesting,” Narcissa replied. “They already have crushes.”

 

“Corridor crushes?” Bella asked, bursting into laughter. “That’s fairly common for first-years.”

 

“Quite frankly, I think it’s silly,” Narcissa added. “We haven’t even been here for an entire day, and they already have ‘crushes.’”

 

Bellatrix looked at Narcissa and rolled her eyes. “Whatever you say, Cissy.”

 

A flock of owls flew over the students’ heads, dropping letters—not just from their parents, but from Professor McGonagall herself. Narcissa caught her letters and immediately opened the one from the professor. It contained her schedule for the week. She briefly scanned it, focusing mainly on her schedule for the day.

 

“What does your schedule look like?” Bellatrix asked.

 

“From eight to nine, I have Potions. Nine-fifteen to ten-fifteen is History of Magic. Ten-thirty to eleven-forty-five is Charms. Then there’s lunch until one o’clock. From one to two, it’s Herbology. Two-fifteen to three-fifteen is flying. And three-thirty to four-thirty is Defense Against the Dark Arts,” Narcissa explained.

 

“Sounds like you have a busy day ahead of you,” Rodolphus noted as he finished his last bite of food.

 

“I really should get going,” Narcissa said as she reached down to grab her bag. Just as she was about to rise from her seat, Andromeda grabbed her arm.

 

“Cissy, you’ve barely touched your plate. You need to eat more,” Andromeda pleaded, concern shining in her eyes.

 

“I’m not hungry, Andy,” Narcissa replied, pulling her arm away from Andromeda. She glanced over at Rodolphus and Bella, who were flirting with each other as usual.

 

“Cissy… please,” Andromeda urged.

 

Reluctantly, Narcissa sat back down and ate most of the food on her plate, leaving behind a few pancakes and some eggs. “There, I ate something,” Narcissa hissed.

 

“I’m just looking out for you, you’re my little sister, I want to make sure you’re safe,”

 

Narcissa just looked at Andromeda and walked out, She walked down the staircases into the dungeons for potions class. Her usual stoic face, set in stone. “Narcissa,”

 

A calm but resonant voice prompted Narcissa to turn around. Lucius stood a few feet behind her, with his bag slung over his shoulder and something in his hand. Upon seeing her turn, he jogged over to her. “Good morning,” he said, offering a small smile.

 

“Good morning,” she replied casually but softly.

 

“I was supposed to give you this last night; it completely slipped my mind,” he said, holding out the object in his hand. It was her personal journal. Narcissa immediately snatched it from his grasp, her face turning a light shade of pink. He flinched but maintained his calm demeanor.

 

“You didn’t read it, did you?” Her voice was calm, yet there was a hint of concern, subtle enough that one might not notice unless they were paying close attention.

 

“No, of course not.” They both stood there in silence, but for Narcissa, it felt like hours of awkwardness.

 

“Thank you, but I need to get to Potions,” Narcissa said as she turned away, walking faster than necessary. Lucius couldn't finish his sentence before she hurried off. He stood for a moment, then headed up and out of the dungeons toward his Charms class.

 

When Narcissa arrived in the Potions classroom, she noticed that the professor wasn’t there yet. The room buzzed with chatter, divided by the students’ own social groups. As she entered, she quickly scanned the room for a familiar face. To her relief, or perhaps her displeasure, Evelyn was among a group of other Slytherin girls who weren’t her roommates.

 

Evelyn immediately noticed Narcissa and waved her over. Narcissa reluctantly did so and sat in an empty seat in the group of girls.

 

“Ladies, this is one of my friends and roommates, Narcissa,” Evelyn said with a smile. 

 

All of the girls waved at Narcissa, and she returned the favor. “Friend?” Narcissa thought. “I’d say we’re more acquaintances, I won’t complain about it,”

 

 

———————

 

The lunch period arrived quicker than expected. Lucius sat at the table with his friends, picking at his food. His mind was consumed with thoughts of Narcissa; he had spent the first half of lunch searching for her. Finally, he got up and walked to the south courtyard, feeling a glimmer of hope that she might be there. However, that hope quickly faded when he realized she wasn't. He sat down on a bench and began to read his book. To anyone else, it appeared that he was simply going about his business, but deep down, no one truly understood how Lucius was really feeling.