Chapter Text
Ilya stood in the doorway of his daughter’s bedroom, watching her sleep.
He couldn’t believe that she was thirteen already. A teenager. How the hell did he have a teenager?
Wasn’t he just twenty-two yesterday? And she was a tiny little pink baby that he could fit in his hand?
Ilya supposed that time did fly when you were having fun (and stressing).
He spent a few more moments just watching Leo’s sleeping face; the wisps of crazy, golden-brown curls that fell over her forehead, the long eyelashes, the relaxed face. She looked a lot like him, but she had her mother’s nose, and her brain, which had been a relief.
She was intelligent, curious, and confident. She loved art, softball, and hockey, which had thrilled Ilya. He’d never wanted to pressure her, happy to support her in whatever her interests were, and she’d found her way to hockey on her own.
They’d had a whole weekend together and she would be going back to her mom’s tomorrow and Ilya always felt a little pang of sadness at having to bring her over.
His home was just as much hers as her mom’s and he would get a whole week with her next week, since part of the custody agreement was to alternate weeks. Ilya lived close to Svetlana on purpose because of that, wanting to be sure that Leo’s routine was interrupted as little as possible.
There were accommodations for when Ilya was traveling for work, though his job was flexible enough that he could work from anywhere, or if Sveta and her new husband were traveling for a conference or vacation.
Sometimes they could bring Leo with them but sometimes they couldn’t. They had a good routine for making things work and sharing responsibilities.
But it was still hard being away from Leo, even though they talked all the time. She was a teenager, wanting to spend more time with her friends, and doing what she wanted to do, than spending time with her parents.
Ilya had never been in love before, not really, but becoming a parent had opened up parts of himself he had never known existed. He loved Leo more than he thought it possible to love another person. He would do anything for her, no questions asked.
He gave himself a few more moments to just watch her, before sighing softly to himself, closing Leo’s door quietly.
Anya, their dog, was sitting at his heels, tail wagging. She looked up at Ilya, tongue lolling out of her mouth.
“Come on,” he said. “Let’s go.”
Ilya lived in a moderately sized condo. A three bedroom he’d saved up for, wanting to have the extra bedroom as his home office once he had been able to get his own sports agency off the ground.
The building had a gym on the floor below Ilya’s, so he left Anya and Leo and locked everything up, before heading downstairs with his phone and headphones to workout.
He went to classes during the week, when Leo was in school, or with her mom, but weekends he worked out in the gym in the building, just in case.
The gym was empty when Ilya got there. He did some stretching (because he was old now) and a warm-up, before going through some lifts with dumbbells, and then some cardio on a bike, all while he listened to a sports podcast discussing the upcoming NHL draft.
Ilya would be at the draft in a few weeks.
He had three prospects that he was working with who were set to go in the first round. Two of them were students, one at Boston College and one at Boston University. The other was international, from Russia, and Ilya had been in deeper contact with him.
Ilya enjoyed working with international hockey players, particularly Russian players, because he remembered the experience.
While he had never had the chance to pursue his NHL dreams because of a career ending knee injury his Junior year of college, being an agent and helping international players had filled some of that hole.
These kids were young, barely spoke any English, and got quite the culture shock in moving to North America. Ilya was glad that he could be a guiding hand for them, making sure that they were as successful as possible, and not getting screwed over.
Finished with his workout, Ilya headed back up to the condo, finding Anya waiting for him, and Leo still sleeping.
He smiled to himself, making sure Anya was fed, her water bowl full, then took a shower, and started in on coffee.
It was ten-thirty when his sleepy daughter emerged from her room. Her curly hair was wild around her head and she rubbed one eye, yawning.
“Oh, good morning,” Ilya said, in Russian, chuckling as Leo yawned some more.
“Morning,” she mumbled, pressing her sleepy self into his side and Ilya wrapped his arms around her, feeling all gooey inside.
Leo had always been affectionate, less so in recent years, but Ilya loved when she was like this, seeking out hugs.
He kissed the top of her head and stroked her curls. She was so tall, taller than most kids her age, still a bit gangly. She was going to be tall, given that Ilya was six-three and Svetlana was five-eleven.
“Can we make pancakes?” Leo asked, in Russian, her arms around Ilya, leaning her weight into him. “With chocolate chips?”
They almost always spoke in Russian when they were together in the condo. Russian had, inadvertently, been Leo’s first language. She was fluent in Russian and English but it meant so much to Ilya that he and his daughter could talk in his native language.
“Sure,” Ilya chuckled.
Leo didn’t move and Ilya just held her for as long as she allowed, before she finally pulled away.
“Can I have coffee?” she asked, motioning at the pot Ilya had brewed for himself.
“Absolutely not,” he replied, making a face at her.
“But Papa…”
“No,” he chuckled.
Leo pouted and Ilya only shook his head. “Not until you’re in college… maybe high school.”
Leo rolled her eyes and Ilya just smiled. “Your mother says the same thing.”
“I know,” she replied testily.
“You can have tea, if you want,” Ilya replied. “There’s orange juice, too.”
Leo let out a dramatic sigh, going to one of the cabinets to pull out a mug and her favorite tea, Earl Grey.
“Make me a London Fog?” she asked, blinking her big hazel eyes up at Ilya.
He held out his hand, motioning it in an ‘and…?’ gesture.
“Please?”
He nodded. “Of course. Anything for you, little star.”
Leo got on the floor with Anya while Ilya made her a London Fog; Earl Grey tea with steamed milk and vanilla syrup.
Then he pulled out ingredients for chocolate chip pancakes and Leo joined him.
She made the batter and he made the pancakes, both of them casually chit-chatting.
School was winding down and Leo was excited for summer vacation. She was doing a hockey camp in August which she was excited about. She would be with Ilya for that, since the first half of his summer was going to be fairly work heavy as he got his clients settled in post-Draft.
Sveta, Leo, and Leo’s step-dad, Hank, were going to London for two weeks a few weeks after school let out, which was also exciting. Ilya was glad that Leo was getting to travel so much and experience new things.
She was also excited to have sleepovers with her friends and do some babysitting to make some of her own money.
Ilya had loved every iteration of being Leo’s parent. Each life stage came with its own unique challenges but he loved being able to talk to her like this. She had her own thoughts and opinions and was learning so much.
She was ten times wiser and more mature than he had been at her age, but she was still a teenager.
He worried about her because all parents worried about their kids. He worried about when she would start to really rebel (if she did at all), he worried about her dating (she’d had a few crushes he’d learned about, but no boyfriends or girlfriends or coming out, yet), he worried about her learning to drive and going to college and meeting new people because he wanted her to be safe and have fun and feel supported and respected.
But he also had to let her live. She would need to make mistakes and figure things out. She just needed to know that he would be there for her no matter what.
Ilya was grateful that they had a good relationship.
He knew several dads who were divorced who had difficult relationships with their exes and their kids. There was nothing like talking to them that put things in perspective for Ilya.
After pancakes and cleaning up, Ilya braided Leo’s hair, and then they took Anya out for her walk.
“Where’s the draft this year?” Leo asked as they walked, both of them watching Anya sniff around a patch of grass.
“Las Vegas,” Ilya replied. “At the Sphere.”
“Ohh, fancy!”
Ilya chuckled. “I think so.”
“Are you excited?”
“Yes. I like the Draft. Is an exciting time for the players. Will be very busy.”
“Can you send me pictures?”
“Of course! And I want pictures from London, too.”
Leo beamed at him. “Yeah! I’m so excited! I want to go to the Tower of London and Westminster and I wanna see Big Ben! Oh! And go on one of those double decker buses and…”
Ilya laughed softly and smiled, listening as Leo went on about all of the things she was excited about for her upcoming trip. He loved seeing her like this, practically glowing with excitement.
He wanted to freeze the moment and hold onto it a little longer.
They went back to the house so Leo could shower, change, and repack her backpack before they headed back to her mom’s house, where she would be back at school tomorrow.
Ilya always felt a little bit of dread as Leo gathered up her things. The condo always felt so much more lively and colorful when she was around. But he’d get his whole week with her soon.
“Ready?” he asked, grabbing his keys.
“Yeah! Let me just say bye to Anya.”
Ilya smiled and watched Leo pet and kiss Anya goodbye, before they were out the door.
“What do you think?” Ilya asked as they took the elevator down to the garage. “We’ll take the cool car?”
Ilya had exactly one cool car, an orange Porsche 718 Cayman. His other car was a sensible Mercedes SUV.
Leo brightened. “Yeah!”
In the garage, they both slid into the Porsche and Ilya drove the ten minutes down the road to Sveta’s house.
Ilya parked the car on the street when they arrived and Leo hopped out of the car with her backpack, heading up the walkway to hug her mom, who stood on her front stoop.
Svetlana and Hank lived in an elegant colonial with a nice front lawn and a decent backyard for living so close to Boston.
Sveta was the vice president of marketing for the Boston Bears and Hank was a neurobiologist doing research at Harvard.
Ilya always joked with Sveta that she’d upgraded after their divorce. Hank was incredibly intelligent and successful and handsome. It was all a well-meaning tease. Ilya wasn’t jealous of Hank. He and Sveta had never really been in love and they were much better friends. The divorce had been a blessing, really.
Ilya smiled as he locked the car and followed his daughter up the steps, placing his sunglasses on top of his head as he watched mother and daughter hugging.
Leo ran into the house and Ilya came up the steps.
“Hi stranger,” Sveta said as they bussed cheeks. “How was she?”
“Hi,” he replied, smiling. “Perfect as always.”
Sveta hadn’t changed much in the last thirteen years. She was still beautiful, with her white blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. She set those eyes on Ilya, observing him for a moment, before they went into the house.
“How’s everything been with you?” she asked as they went to the kitchen.
“Fine,” Ilya replied. “Busy.”
“You’re not seeing anyone?” Sveta asked, coming around her kitchen island, running one beautifully manicured hand over the granite.
It was a question she asked Ilya almost every time they saw one another. Ilya’s answer had been the same for the past nine years.
“No,” he said. “I’ve been very busy with work.”
Sveta hummed, the sound vaguely disapproving.
They had gotten divorced when Leo was three, having tried but failed to make things work. Neither of them had been happy and knew things would be better if they split up and co-parented.
Sveta had started dating when Leo was five, having sat down and talked with Ilya about her decision and what that meant for their daughter.
A year later, she’d met Hank.
She had taken her time with him, waiting a year, wanting to be sure that their relationship was solid before introducing him to Leo.
But Hank was great.
He loved Sveta and he loved Leo. He got along well with Ilya and respected Ilya’s role in Leo’s life, just as Ilya respected his role.
It was about as good a dynamic as one could have when three parents were involved but Ilya did appreciate that Hank deferred to Ilya and Sveta when it came to making decisions about Leo’s life and caring for her.
She was an incredibly well-loved and taken care of girl.
“Ilya…”
“I’m fine,” Ilya assured her.
“Are you?” Sveta asked, leaning against one of the counters, her face one of soft concern. “It’s been nine years.”
Ilya shrugged. “I’m fine. I have Anya, I have friends. Work is going well.”
“I know, but you’ve been alone for a long time. I worry about you.”
“Don’t,” he insisted. “I’m fine.”
And it was the truth, mostly.
Okay, maybe he was a little lonely.
Ilya had come out as bisexual after he and Sveta had split up. Prior to their dating, Ilya liked to just have sex with as many people as possible. After their divorce, he’d started doing that again, for a few years.
He’d tried dating, a bit, but hadn’t ever been successful. Mostly because people didn’t like the fact that he had a kid.
Ilya wasn’t resentful about that, he had just resolved himself to having one-night stands or reliable hookups without commitment.
Hooking up with people the way he used to in his early twenties really didn’t do it for him now though. Sex was always nice, of course, and Ilya wouldn’t say he was hard up for it, but he hadn’t dated anyone in years.
And yes, he did like the idea of falling in love and having someone to spend the rest of his life with, but there were complications to that.
He was older now, too. He would be thirty-five next month and his priorities were different.
Ilya had made his peace with where things were in his life and it was fine.
If the right person came along, then great. He could maybe put himself out there, but he just didn’t really have the energy for dating.
“Hank and I have a few single friends…”
“Svetlana,” Ilya said, before they were interrupted by Hank.
“Ilya!” he greeted as he strode in from the backyard.
“Hello, Hank,” Ilya replied, offering a smile. They shook hands and hugged.
“How are you? How is everything? How was Leo?”
Sveta shot Ilya a look that suggested the conversation wasn’t over as Ilya filled Hank in on his life and how Leo had been this weekend.
Not long after, Leo joined them in the kitchen, declaring that she was hungry.
Ilya was convinced to stay for lunch, which was very kind, and was caught up on everything happening in the Vetrova-Ekholm household.
They talked a bit about the draft and Ilya’s trip to Vegas before it was time for him to go.
He bussed Sveta’s cheeks and shook Hank’s hand and gave Leo a long hug goodbye.
“Have a good week at school,” he told her, kissing the top of her head. “I will text you and call you everyday.”
“I will. I know.”
“I love you, little star.”
“I love you, too, Papa.”
Ilya left, giving one last wave, before getting into the Porsche, and headed back to his empty condo.
He looked at his phone when he walked in the door, patting Anya’s head.
Sveta: Just think about it
Ilya sighed and texted her back.
Ilya: okay
***
On Tuesdays, Ilya went to therapy.
It was once a month now, which Ilya felt was good progress. He’d done a lot of work on himself and he knew he was much better off now than he had been before he’d started.
He had been seeing Dr. Galina Molchalina for about eight years after experiencing a very difficult depressive episode.
It had been pretty scary, feeling the way he did, thinking the way he was. He hadn’t wanted to fuck things up with Leo, and Sveta had been concerned, so he’d gotten help.
He was doing much better now then he had five years ago, but the check-ins were nice.
Galina sat across from him, smiling warmly. She was a small woman, in her forties, with dark blonde hair that she was wearing down, brushing her shoulders. Ilya enjoyed working with her. She was funny and no nonsense. An added plus was that she spoke Russian.
“How has everything been going?” she asked Ilya after their pleasantries were exchanged.
Ilya talked to her about his week with Leo, the upcoming draft and his trip to Vegas, and plans he had with friends at the end of the week before he picked Leo up for their week together.
“Svetlana brought up me dating again,” he said, leaning back on the couch. “I understand that she’s worried about me but I’m fine. It’s been fine.”
Galina just sat there, quietly, watching Ilya with a soft expression on her face. Ilya held out for about thirty seconds before he started talking.
“Okay, maybe I’m a little… lonely. Sometimes.”
Galina nodded. “We’ve talked about this before. Feeling lonely but not wanting to really date or put yourself out there. You’re very confident when you’re hooking up with people. Is dating so different?”
Ilya supposed that it really wasn’t that different.
He usually met people at bars, chatting them up, flirting, then taking them home with him. He had kind of aged out of clubbing and didn’t really want to go to clubs now that he was in his mid-thirties.
But bars were okay.
Ilya knew that he was charming. He was handsome and in shape. He had a good sense of humor. A lot of people liked his accent, too.
There were a lot of draws.
The usual hiccup to dating was the fact that he was divorced and had a kid.
To Galina’s point, which she'd made a few times over the course of their work together, many of the people who had had an issue with this in Ilya’s past were people Ilya had tried dating in his twenties. Now that he was older and he would, presumably, be open to dating people around the same age as him, more people in that age bracket were divorced and had kids, so it was less of an issue.
So maybe dating again wouldn’t be as bad as he was expecting. Ilya talked a few things out with Galina, about giving dating a try again, and Ilya left Galina’s office feeling a little more hopeful.
He got home, greeted by an excited Anya, and Ilya spent some time petting her, and getting her ready for her evening walk before dinner.
Adopting Anya had been one of the best decisions.
Leo had wanted a dog and Ilya had, too, so they’d gone to the MSPCA during one of their adoption events and had found Anya. They had all fallen in love with each other and Ilya had brought Anya home a week later.
That had been two years ago. Ilya loved having a companion, coming home to an excited dog, happy to see him. She was affectionate, too, which he loved.
Yes, he was lonely, longing for human companionship, but it felt really nice to have Anya.
After their walk, he fed Anya, and then started making his own dinner after changing into his pajamas.
He ate dinner and then worked on prepping for Vegas, sitting at his kitchen counter with his laptop, poring over his Excel spreadsheets.
He was excited for this trip. He enjoyed traveling, interacting with his clients, their families, and the hockey world.
It would be a fun time and he was looking forward to it.