Chapter Text
The heavy rain should have foreshadowed the trouble that is about to follow.
Yeonjun has never particularly liked the rain. While most people tend to enjoy the peaceful atmosphere that comes with the rain and cocoon themselves underneath a blanket with a mug of hot chocolate in hand, Yeonjun always finds himself so miserable each time it rains. He does not find it calming at all and he never gets why people love the rain so much.
Perhaps, somewhere along the way, he has come to associate rain with all the bad things that happen in the world.
Well, it is not like he is wrong about it. Accidents are statistically more likely to occur during rainstorms, after all. The clouds looming overhead block people’s vision from fully seeing their surroundings, causing the rate of danger to significantly increase. The safest place to be is always indoors and Yeonjun has never been one to enjoy staying indoors for a long period of time. He likes feeling the sunlight on his skin when he goes out. Even the particularly wet scent of rain is grating to him as it makes him feel mellow.
Tonight’s rainstorm is especially nostalgic, though.
Something about it makes Yeonjun feel a little too sad right now. It does not help that he has just returned to Seoul from visiting his aunt and cousins in California. He wishes that he could stay longer and he misses them dearly already. As much as he wants to extend his stay, he knows that all vacations come to an end, whether he likes it or not. He cannot stay there forever simply to escape the memories that haunt him back home.
Having landed about an hour ago, Yeonjun is about to arrive at his studio apartment. As soon as he gets off the cab, he is soaking wet, all thanks to the rain. Pulling his luggage with one hand, he trudges into his apartment building and waits for the elevator. Thunder can be heard in the distance, almost making him jump before he regains his composure. For someone who has been trained to constantly be aware of his surroundings, thunders tend to startle him easily.
Ironic, really.
The elevator dings in the silence of the night, signifying its arrival, and Yeonjun enters with his luggage before pressing the button for the highest floor. He taps his foot restlessly while waiting, feeling completely uncomfortable in his wet clothes. He really wants to get a change of clothes as soon as possible. A warm shower and a good night sleep are the only things on his mind right at this moment. His luggage can wait another day to be unpacked.
Once again, the elevator dings when it arrives on the floor of his studio apartment. With fast strides, Yeonjun makes his way to the door of his apartment, pulling his luggage along. He keys in his passcode and a beeping sound ensues as the door unlocks.
His studio apartment is shrouded in darkness. His drawn blind curtains block out any kind of light from outside, leaving only the light from the corridor to allow Yeonjun get a glimpse of the absolute mess he left behind before he flew to California. Well, he will deal with that another day too. Right now, he simply wants to feel clean and fresh before heading straight to bed. It has been a long flight, after all.
Just as Yeonjun’s eyes are trying to adapt to the dark, his phone rings. Grabbing it from his pocket, he answers it with a quiet hello.
“Hey,” Taehyun’s familiar voice on the other side of the line greets. Without waiting for Yeonjun to respond, Taehyun continues, “Some shit just went down earlier and I’ve been trying to reach you all day but my calls couldn’t get through until now.”
“Yeah, sorry, I was on a flight,” Yeonjun apologises, mildly distracted as he drags his luggage inside. Whatever that Taehyun is about to inform him must have been pretty important though, considering how it has been some time since they last talked to each other. Besides, Taehyun rarely calls unless there is a reason for it.
The front door closes behind him and it locks automatically while Yeonjun takes his shoes off and puts them on his rack. Switching the lights on, his studio apartment is now fully lit up. Everything seems to be left exactly the way it was before he left two weeks ago.
Well, except for one thing.
The presence of an all-too familiar man in his apartment causes him to freeze in his tracks in disbelief, like a deer in the headlights.
In his ear, he can hear Taehyun continue to talk, “Okay, I hope you won’t take this too hard but Beomgyu escaped from prison today and we’re still trying to figure out what happened and what resources he has to pull this off. We thought we seized all his assets and destroyed his entire network but apparently not. So, whatever it is that you do, don’t go back home tonight for your own safety. Go to crowded places and get a hotel to stay in or something. Your apartment isn’t registered under your name, so it should not show up in the records as yours, but I think you should stay away for a while, anyway.”
For a moment, Yeonjun remains quiet as he stares at the person who is seated so casually on his study chair with his legs stretched out and back leaning against it in such a cocky manner. Taehyun’s voice feels like a million miles away as he continues to rattle off about what else Yeonjun can do to stay safe and how he will make sure that Beomgyu will be found soon and to, please, please, please, keep in touch.
Well, it does not seem like Yeonjun would need any help in finding Beomgyu. The man is right here in his humble abode, smirking at him in amusement, as if he could hear what exactly the call is about. He probably could, really, as Taehyun’s voice is pretty loud.
Fuck.
Yeonjun is utterly fucked.
And not in a good way.
Yeonjun has no idea what he is supposed to do right now. It has been a year since he last saw Beomgyu and they have never spoken ever since Yeonjun left him to be arrested. They did not even exchange a word during all the times they saw each other in court with Yeonjun testifying against him. Beomgyu has never once tried to initiate contact at all, despite being betrayed. Not one threatening phone call, not one death threat, not even a letter written to him.
All Yeonjun knows is that nothing good will come out of this.
Even then, he needs to study Beomgyu closely and figure out what exactly Beomgyu wants from him. Beomgyu is a smart and calculative man. He will never do things impulsively. The fact that he is right here in Yeonjun’s apartment means that there is still unfinished business between them.
Well, It is probably not that hard to find out, really. Any mafia boss who has been betrayed by their own husband will probably seek out said husband for revenge. That much is obvious. Beomgyu is probably here to end his life.
But Yeonjun is trained enough to assess the situation at hand without panicking, no matter how fucked he is. He notices the way Beomgyu is dressed in all black; black jacket draped over a black tank top and a pair of black jeans. He looks clean-shaven too, as if the first thing he did after he escaped from prison was to shave. His hair is shorter than Yeonjun remembers, but he grudgingly admits that the hairstyle still suits Beomgyu well. Beomgyu’s posture is relaxed and cocky, which is a clear sign that he believes that he is in control of this situation right now.
To be fair, considering that Yeonjun is the one currently in danger, Beomgyu is completely justified in his belief. It does not mean that Yeonjun will not fight back, though.
For a brief second, Beomgyu pushes one side of his jacket to reveal the gun he carries in his holster. A completely unsubtle threat.
Ah, no wonder he is being all cocky.
Yeonjun almost wants to scoff. However, understanding the situation that he is facing at this moment, he knows that he cannot simply just run out of the front door. Beomgyu is fast enough to grab the gun and shoot him before he even makes it out. If he tells Taehyun that Beomgyu is right here with him, it will only put him in more danger than he already is, with the outcome being shot to death by his own husband.
There is only one choice here.
“Hey, Taehyun,” Yeonjun interrupts his colleague’s rambling about safety protocols and measures, which he has stopped listening to ever since his eyes landed on Beomgyu. You’re too late, is what he wants to say to Taehyun. Instead, he utters, “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I’ll text you later, okay?” Without waiting for a response, he hangs up the phone.
Silence fills the studio apartment now that Taehyun’s voice is no longer around to fill it.
The awkwardness is truly suffocating. Yeonjun has no idea what to say to break the silence between them. He feels conflicted, really. On one hand, he is wary about the events that will unfold as Beomgyu is unpredictable. Yeonjun is uncertain if he will even survive the night. On the other hand, a part of him aches as he remembers their memories together, be it good or bad.
Meanwhile, Beomgyu still has an amused smirk etched on his lips, as if he is waiting for some sort of a reaction from Yeonjun, as if this situation is not bizarre to him at all, as if he is completely unaffected by this reunion.
What is he expecting Yeonjun to do, though? Does he expect him to be afraid? To cry? To yell?
What do you do when you meet your husband of five, no, almost seven now, years after fooling him into falling in love with you and betraying him to take his drug empire down? They have not seen each other in a year ever since Yeonjun testified against him in court and Yeonjun frankly has never thought that he would see him again.
Hell, despite the fact that neither of them has served divorce papers to the other, Yeonjun has never once visited Beomgyu in prison, choosing to hide himself away instead. He has never once considered the possibility of Beomgyu escaping from prison and seeking him out. He has been living his life peacefully without any fear of his husband finding him. He thought he was safe. He thought that the prison bars would create distance between them and protect him.
Apparently not.
When it is clear that Beomgyu is not going to say anything first, Yeonjun decides to end the awkwardness by saying, “Before you kill me, can you at least let me shower and change my clothes first? It’d be so fucking uncomfortable to die in wet clothes.”
He gestures towards his soaking shirt to make his point. For someone who is basically at gunpoint, although technically Beomgyu is not even aiming the gun at him, Yeonjun feels more irritated that his plan to have a warm shower is interrupted than scared to face his husband, who used to run one of the biggest crime organisations in South Korea.
Beomgyu snorts in response. “How cute,” he coos almost endearingly. “You think I give a fuck about what you’re wearing before I send you straight to hell?”
“Well, the fact that I’m still standing here right now before you instead of lying on the floor with my brains blown out tells me that you’re not planning to kill me yet,” Yeonjun points out in a matter-of-fact tone that he knows will irk Beomgyu.
It is true, though. Beomgyu is easily the most heartless person that Yeonjun knows. Throughout the years that they have spent together, if Beomgyu has set his mind on killing someone, he would do it without hesitation. There never was any dilly-dallying or excuses. If Beomgyu truly wants Yeonjun dead, he would be dead by now. Beomgyu would have shot him from the first time that he entered the apartment.
No, Beomgyu wants something else from him. Yeonjun has no idea what it is, but he intends to take advantage of it to prolong this confrontation and figure out a way to get out of this predicament with his head intact.
“If you’re that uncomfortable with what you’re wearing, you can change your clothes right here,” Beomgyu shrugs.
“In front of you?” Yeonjun questions with an eyebrow raised.
Beomgyu shoots him an incredulous look. “What? Suddenly, you’re shy now? It’s not like I haven’t seen you naked before.”
The words Beomgyu uttered immediately causes heat to rise on Yeonjun’s cheeks. Memories of all the times that they were intimate with each other flash through Yeonjun’s mind. Hell, they were more than intimate, if Yeonjun has to be completely honest. But those times were of different circumstances. Yeonjun was playing his role as Beomgyu’s lover perfectly and it entailed having sex with him.
Now is a completely different story, though. They may still be married legally on papers, but so much has changed.
“Can I, at least, change in the bathroom?” Yeonjun requests, not keeping his hopes up.
“I’m not going to risk you finding a way to escape somehow,” Beomgyu rejects his request flatly.
Yeonjun rolls his eyes. It is not like there is a way to escape from his bathroom. He literally lives on the highest floor of this building. Unless he is Superman with the ability to fly in the air, it is impossible to escape.
Even then, there are two choices here. Either Yeonjun is bound to wear these wet clothes throughout whatever ordeal Beomgyu has set to put him through tonight, or he can change in front of Beomgyu and wear comfortable clothes, at the very least, while facing whatever shit Beomgyu intends to throw his way.
The thing is, Yeonjun refuses to show Beomgyu that he is affected by his presence at the moment because he knows that as soon as he displays any weakness, Beomgyu will bite on it and refuse to let go like a vulture. Yeonjun wants to act like he is completely nonchalant while he figures out a way to stay alive after this encounter.
So, he slowly walks over to his wardrobe with Beomgyu’s eyes following every step that he takes. The only thing that is separating them right now is the bed in between his study table and wardrobe. Feeling slightly wary, Yeonjun carefully grabs the hem of his shirt and takes it off, feeling relieved that it is no longer clinging to his skin. Out of the corner of his eyes, Yeonjun notices the way Beomgyu’s eyes rake over his body appreciatively.
Huh.
Interesting.
Wanting to test out his hypothesis, Yeonjun pulls his pants down before kicking it away once it pools around his ankles. Now, only in his boxers, Yeonjun turns to face Beomgyu directly, fighting the urge to smirk when he sees how Beomgyu is unable to take his eyes off him. Beomgyu’s gaze on him is heavy and dark, laced with a familiar emotion that Yeonjun finds himself unable to say out loud as it awakens too many memories inside his head.
“Having fun with this, aren’t you?” Beomgyu comments tightly as his jaw clenches.
“You’re the one who wanted me to change in front of you,” Yeonjun shoots right back, feigning innocence. Then, he turns his back to Beomgyu to take off his boxers, leaving his ass on full display.
Trying his best to control his facial expression, Yeonjun opens his wardrobe and takes the nearest towel he can find inside. He dabs himself with the towel, wanting to dry himself as much as possible. Then, he grabs a clean pair of boxers, black sweatpants and a grey hoodie before getting properly dressed. He does not turn around once to see if Beomgyu is watching. Without even seeing it with his own eyes, he knows that his husband is definitely appreciating the view. It would only make him feel all sorts of flustered if he sees how much of it Beomgyu is enjoying. He refuses to show that to his husband.
Now that he is comfortable in dry clothes, Yeonjun feels like he can deal with this, whatever this is, much better now. He takes in a deep breath before finally turning around to face Beomgyu heads-on. He lifts his chin almost defiantly as he asks, “So, are you here to kill me or what?”
Beomgyu remains relaxed from where he is sitting, eyes never once leaving Yeonjun. It is then that Yeonjun realises that as much as he has been studying Beomgyu, his husband is doing the same thing to him too. Both of them are trying really hard to read each other and Yeonjun wonders what Beomgyu sees, or if he sees right through him at all.
“Of course,” Beomgyu answers, shrugging nonchalantly. “You’d deserve that, wouldn’t you?”
Yeonjun stiffens immediately as soon as he hears that.
As the head of Thursday’s Child, one of the most notorious crime organisations in South Korea, Beomgyu has always been the one enforcing the code of conduct in the organisation. Anyone who breaks it will face dire consequences. It is needless to say that the price of betrayal is death.
And Yeonjun, even as the organisation head’s husband, is not an exception to the code.
Truth be told, Yeonjun is not at all surprised that Beomgyu is coming for his head as soon as he escaped from prison. The act of betrayal that he did is truly the biggest betrayal in the history of Thursday’s Child. The scale of his betrayal was so big that it brought down the entire drug empire that Beomgyu’s family had worked so hard to establish for generations. This betrayal is bound to put a target on his back.
Everyone had told him to flee the country as soon as he was done with his job. They told him to move out to California where most of his family members are. That would keep him the safest and beyond Beomgyu’s reach.
But Yeonjun’s entire life was built here. Although he has always enjoyed visiting California, he refuses to live there. After all, he grew up in Seoul. He wants to reach his dreams in Seoul. His heart is in Seoul. So, he is determined to remain here where he belongs. Besides, at the time, he was fully confident that Beomgyu and his entire organisation have been taken down completely beyond repair. He had ensured that their entire network was destroyed. He made sure that Beomgyu would have no allies left and Thursday’s Child was burnt into ashes. That was a part of his role as an undercover operative in the organisation.
Yet, here Beomgyu is, right in his studio apartment, proving him wrong.
“How are you going to do it?” Yeonjun asks quietly, wondering if tonight is the night he has to say goodbye to the world. He hates that it is about to happen when it is raining heavily right now, but it is not like he has a say in choosing the time of his death.
Beomgyu tilts his head to the side slightly as his smirk widens, as if he is truly enjoying this situation. “It really depends on your answers to my questions,” he replies lightly. “I ask and you answer. If I like your answers, maybe I’ll have mercy on you and give you a quick death.”
For a moment, Yeonjun wonders if there is really no way that he can get out of this alive. It seems like Beomgyu is truly determined to exact revenge on him, which means a sure death. If it were anyone else, Yeonjun knows that they would have been relentlessly tortured for days before death comes for them. He has no idea why Beomgyu is not tying him up and torturing him right now. The scale of his betrayal was bigger than anyone else’s. In the code of conduct, he probably deserves more than death.
But, of course, Beomgyu has questions. Yeonjun can only imagine the amount of burning questions he has ever since Yeonjun led him to the exact location where he was arrested. He should play those questions into his advantage, really. Maybe there is a way that he can drag this out until he can come up with a plan to get himself to safety.
Yeonjun steps closer to the bed before taking a seat on the edge while maintaining his gaze on Beomgyu. “Make your questions worth my time, then,” he says in an almost challenging tone.
Beomgyu scoffs, but he does not comment anything on it. “Is your real name even Choi Yeonjun?” he asks instead.
Bewildered, Yeonjun looks at Beomgyu questioningly, unable to believe his ears. “Seriously?” he deadpans.
Beomgyu’s face shows that he is dead serious, though. Perhaps, it would be wise if he were to give the answers that Beomgyu seeks without a fight. But Yeonjun is not Yeonjun if he simply surrenders without trying to fuck with Beomgyu first.
“Despite your whole organisation being taken down, you still manage to have enough resources to escape from prison somehow. Surely you would have sources that can tell you my real name,” Yeonjun finally answers, rolling his eyes.
“All my sources told me that you used your real name for your operation,” Beomgyu replies, pointedly ignoring the jab.
Yeonjun remains silent at that. He is not at liberty to tell Beomgyu the secrets of how his identity was curated. It was a top secret and only three people know about it; his supervisor, the IT guy who made the changes to all the systems required and himself. Hell, he probably will not even be able to answer any of the questions that Beomgyu has if it is all operational-based because he cannot reveal it to anyone, ever.
“That means we’re actually legally married,” Beomgyu points out as his back straightens for the first time since Yeonjun saw him in his studio apartment. “If you used your real identity to fuck with me, you actually married me.”
“Yeah,” Yeonjun responds drily.
Unexpectedly, Beomgyu lets out a loud bitter laugh at the answer. “Are you a spy or a whore?” he asks, voice dripping with heavy sarcasm. “How far would you have gone to fool me just to take us down?”
Oh, Beomgyu has no fucking idea, really.
Letting out a soft sigh, Yeonjun chooses to lie down on his bed from his sitting position, no longer maintaining eye contact with his husband. He can feel Beomgyu’s heavy questioning eyes on him, but he does not give a fuck about it at all. Beomgyu has no idea how Yeonjun had lost himself throughout the operation, how much he had given away, how far he had gone in the name of the operation.
Yeonjun stares up at the ceiling, thinking about everything he has done during the five years he spent as Beomgyu’s spouse. He thinks about the sacrifices he made, the blood on his hands and the stains that can never be washed away. He thinks about his choices, his regrets and all the things he wishes that he had done differently.
It is too many, really, and if it were not for Beomgyu interrupting his thoughts, it could go on forever.
“Your apartment’s pathetic,” Beomgyu comments, snapping Yeonjun back to reality. “After taking down the largest drug empire in South Korea, wouldn’t you have gotten paid enough to afford somewhere better than this?”
At that, Yeonjun laughs heartily, turning his head to look at his husband from where he is lying down. He knows that his studio apartment is probably too small for Beomgyu’s liking. Beomgyu has lived all his life in his family mansion. Of course he finds this apartment pathetic. The size, the mess, the furniture; it is not up to whatever standards Beomgyu has.
“Not as pathetic as your prison cell, probably,” he jabs in return once his laughter has subsided, refusing to let Beomgyu get away with insulting his home.
“My cell is probably cleaner than your whole apartment,” Beomgyu retorts, jutting his chin towards the mess inside his apartment. His dirty clothes are strewn everywhere and he has unopened parcels stacking up in the corner. One would have thought that having a studio apartment would be easier to clean because it is not as big as other apartments. Not Yeonjun, though.
Yeonjun rolls his eyes in response. “At least I get to shit in a proper bathroom,” he shoots back.
Beomgyu’s jaw drops open. “Foul,” he complains. Even then, the twitch of his lips tells Yeonjun that he takes no offence to it at all.
This all feels too familiar. The bantering, the light flirting, the teasing. Yeonjun refuses to think about it, though. Not right now, at least. He cannot deal with this right now. His mind is too tired to think after his long flight.
Now that he is lying on his back, Yeonjun begins to feel how heavy his eyes are. He should be more alert, really, especially since his murderous mafia boss husband has threatened to kill him multiple times tonight. Yet, the exhaustion has settled deep within his bones and the rain pouring outside without any hint of stopping makes him feel sleepy.
Beomgyu probably still has many unanswered questions. As long as he has those, Yeonjun’s life is still safe until his husband decides otherwise. Right now is too early for him to die, though.
So, he mumbles, half-awake, “I’m tired, Gyu. Can we continue this conversation tomorrow?”
Before he can hear Beomgyu’s response, his mind has drifted away to dreamland.
Like many of his dreams for the past seven years, tonight’s dream is not particularly pleasant.
While Yeonjun never remembers the details of his dreams exactly, he always remembers glimpses of it. Nowadays, there will always be a scent of smoke with a lot of yelling and screaming in the distance. Fire is set ablaze and the heat sears through his skin with so much blood everywhere; on his hands, on his feet, on his clothes and all over his body. In the dream, his feet are hurting like hell but he keeps running and running and running to God knows where.
Yeonjun always wakes up gasping for breath with his heart pounding so loudly against his ribs and tears pouring down his cheeks relentlessly.
Today, his panic is driven further when he realises that his right wrist is handcuffed to the bed frame, restricting his freedom to move. Tugging at it, he tries to wrench his hand away but to no avail. The tears are blurring his vision while he struggles to get some air into his lungs with his wrist hurting from the friction between his hand and the cuff.
“It’ll hurt more if you do that,” a familiar voice says softly, breaking through the panic that blankets him.
It is then Yeonjun is reminded of everything that happened last night. He turns to look at the direction of the voice only to find a shirtless Beomgyu who looks fresh out of a shower. The sight of Beomgyu immediately causes Yeonjun to stop struggling against the handcuff. Even then, tears are still trailing down his cheeks and his breaths are still laboured.
Yeonjun watches as Beomgyu walks over to the bed, trying his best to stop his tears from falling and keep his breaths even. This is embarrassing, really. He does not remember the last time Beomgyu saw him cry. It is probably ages ago and he has never thought that Beomgyu would ever witness him cry again.
With unexpected gentleness, Beomgyu takes Yeonjun’s right wrist in one of his hands and rubs the spot where it has turned red from Yeonjun’s thrashing earlier. Yeonjun just looks on wordlessly, not knowing what to say, as his husband reaches into his pants’ pocket to grab a small key. Then, he unlocks the handcuff.
Relieved that his hand is finally free, Yeonjun sits up on the bed, sniffling. He holds his right wrist carefully, pressing on the red spots in hopes that it would ease the pain.
“Don’t cry,” Beomgyu murmurs as he looks at Yeonjun with an unreadable expression on his face. “I had to handcuff you in case you woke up while I was showering and decided to run away.”
Slowly, Yeonjun’s tears come to a stop. He looks at Beomgyu with a miffed expression, unable to believe his ears. “Handcuffing me wouldn’t be necessary,” he huffs. “Where in this city can I run to without you finding me?”
“You’re crafty and I don’t trust you,” Beomgyu shrugs.
Yeah, well.
Yeonjun cannot exactly blame Beomgyu for not trusting him, can he?
Instead of saying anything else, Yeonjun simply wipes his tears with the back of his hand. His breathing has now stabilised and his heart has stopped beating too fast. Now that he is calmer, he finally takes in the situation that he is currently in. He has no time to waste since his life is in danger, so he pushes the bad dream to the back of his head like he always does.
Beomgyu is still shirtless with traces of water from his shower still visible on his chest, trickling downwards. The familiar tattoo of a skull with two guns crossing below it and TC written in a pretty font on the guns can be seen as he is only wearing the same pair of black jeans from last night with the holster. It seems like being in prison does not prevent Beomgyu from keeping in shape. His arms are still as muscular as Yeonjun remembers them to be and his chest is still perfectly toned. He looks absolutely healthy and good, like being in prison had zero effect on him.
For a moment, Yeonjun feels self-conscious. After completing his first ever undercover mission successfully, he has decided to go on a sabbatical for an unknown period. Those years spent in Thursday’s Child really took a toll on him and he desperately needs a break. This means that he has been slacking in his workouts, especially since he finds that there is no reason to hit the gym lately. While his body remains toned, he knows that he has lost some muscle mass. If he survives this ordeal, he swears that he will start going to the gym regularly again.
“You look well,” Yeonjun remarks lightly, breaking the silence between them.
Beomgyu blinks. “Thanks,” he replies. Then, he adds, “You’ve lost weight.”
At that, Yeonjun averts his gaze, not wanting to meet Beomgyu’s eyes. He has not expected his husband to point that out at all. After not meeting each other for so long, he has forgotten how observant and blunt Beomgyu is.
“You haven’t been eating well lately, have you?” Beomgyu asks, raising an eyebrow.
“It’s really none of your business,” Yeonjun snaps, hating how exposed he feels under Beomgyu’s eyes.
“You’re right, it isn’t,” Beomgyu agrees easily. Too easily. “But you’re still my husband, aren’t you? We’re still married. I’m just concerned for your health. Judging from the dark circles beneath your eyes and your nightmare earlier, you haven’t been sleeping well, either.”
The expression that Beomgyu wears is of innocence and what looks akin to concern, but Yeonjun knows better. He knows Beomgyu too well to see through his bullshit. All these statements are not genuine concern. It is Beomgyu’s way of throwing in all his current weaknesses into his face to show that he is in control. This is what Beomgyu did best when he dealt with his enemies during a negotiation back then.
Refusing to fall for Beomgyu’s trap, Yeonjun stands up from the bed, pointedly ignoring Beomgyu’s words. “I’m going to shower,” he says, trying his best to sound neutral. “If you don’t trust me alone in there, you can come with me.”
Choi Beomgyu.
The head of Thursday’s Child, also known as the largest drug empire which controls the manufacturing, trafficking and distribution of illegal drugs in South Korea.
Probably the most wanted man in Seoul right now.
If someone were to ask Yeonjun what kind of man Beomgyu is, he would have answered that Beomgyu is simultaneously the best and the worst man he has ever gotten involved with romantically. Or ever. There is no one else like Beomgyu, really.
Beomgyu, for a lack of better word, is complicated.
A complete paradox, really.
Even until now, despite being Beomgyu’s husband for five years before things went to shit, Yeonjun has no idea how to describe Beomgyu. He has spent so many days and nights with Beomgyu. He has seen every single aspect of who Beomgyu is as a person. He has witnessed countless of cruelties and atrocities that his own husband committed right in front of his eyes. Yet, he has also watched Beomgyu’s gentleness and kindness towards him and others.
It is confusing, honestly.
Everything about Beomgyu confuses him to the very core.
Yeonjun has always seen it as clear as day; Beomgyu is definitely not a good person. Given everything that he has done, he is far from the definition of a good person. The craziest thing of all is how Beomgyu has never bothered to put on a front for Yeonjun right from the start, refusing to hide himself. He presents himself the way he is unapologetically and Yeonjun is always expected to accept and love him the way he is, as his spouse.
And Yeonjun, at that point of time, had no choice but to play the role of a perfect husband to keep everyone’s suspicions at bay.
The memories are still crystal clear in Yeonjun’s mind. Every single person that Beomgyu killed, every drop of blood that he spilled and every single cry of mercy that his victims emitted are all still embedded inside his head. He honestly does not think that those memories will ever be eradicated from his mind. It is so deeply ingrained that he can still see it when he closes his eyes, sometimes.
Yeonjun still remembers the very first time he witnessed Beomgyu’s sadistic display of violence without even a hint of remorse. It was the night that Beomgyu brought him to a casino for the very first time. At the time, they were not married yet, but Beomgyu’s intentions with him were pretty obvious for everyone to see. And Yeonjun was thrilled to know that Beomgyu was slowly integrating him into his world.
It was a Friday night so the casino was crowded. Yeonjun trailed behind Beomgyu while the latter exchanged a huge amount of cash that Yeonjun would never dream of owning for chips. Afterwards, Beomgyu showed him around and taught him how to gamble, starting with the slot machines. It was honestly a strange experience because wherever they went inside the casino, people moved out of the way for them. The staff even bowed in their direction, avoiding proper eye contact.
All except for one person.
As soon as Yeonjun stepped inside the casino, his trained eyes managed to catch a suspicious man lingering around him and Beomgyu. The man was always staring at them, Yeonjun in particular, no matter where they went. The intense staring made Yeonjun feel uncomfortable but he figured that the man would not do anything untoward in such a public place where all eyes were watching.
Unfortunately, he was wrong.
When Beomgyu had to leave him for a little while because he had matters to attend to, Yeonjun decided to try out his luck at one of the slot machines again. It was then when the man made his presence fully known.
“So, you’re the whore that Beomgyu’s fucking now, huh?” he snarled when he got close.
Taken aback, Yeonjun stood up from the stool, completely wary. Up close, he realised that the man was probably about the same age as him. He had a jagged scar on his left cheek and his eyes were filled with malice.
“Pretty little things like you got no business getting involved with an asshole like him,” the stranger sneered as his lips curled in disdain. He looked at Yeonjun from head to toe as if the very sight of him disgusted him.
Before Yeonjun could do anything about it, two men dressed in all black suddenly stepped in. “You’re out of line,” one of the men warned with his eyes narrowed. “I have to kindly ask you to leave.”
The stranger snorted loudly in response. “I’m not doing anything wrong,” he protested, rolling his eyes.
“You’re causing a scene,” the other man in black replied. “You can either leave quietly or we’ll make you leave.”
“Is that a threat I hear?”
Everything happened too fast after that. Yeonjun could only watch as the stranger tried to throw a punch only to be subdued with both his arms pinned behind his back by one of the men. He was now being dragged, while still protesting loudly, by the man restricting his movements. The other man looked at Yeonjun and gestured at him to follow suit.
Not knowing what else to do, Yeonjun let the two men lead them inside a private room. He was starting to feel apprehensive, but he kept his mouth shut. He had a feeling that there was something more to this. There had to be. They could have just kicked the stranger out of the casino and that was it. There was no need to go somewhere else to settle this issue.
Once inside the private room, Yeonjun’s eyes immediately found Beomgyu, who was lounging on the sofa with another man dressed in a suit. They seemed to be in the middle of a serious discussion as they looked mildly irritated to be interrupted.
However, Yeonjun saw the exact moment that Beomgyu’s eyes softened when he realised that something was wrong.
“We’ll continue our discussion another day, then,” the man in the suit said before leaving.
Beomgyu simply nodded without saying anything. As soon as the man left, he asked in a hard tone which Yeonjun had never heard from him before, “What’s going on?”
The man who was still pinning the stranger’s arms behind his back spoke up, “This man was harassing Yeonjun.”
Beomgyu’s eyes flickered to Yeonjun. In a soft voice, he asked, “Is that true?”
Yeonjun’s mouth tasted of ashes. He had no idea what to respond. On one hand, it was true. On the other hand, he dreaded to find out what Beomgyu would do if he affirmed what happened. It was the first time that they had been in this kind of situation. For the past few months of them dating, no one ever dared to fuck with Yeonjun.
Until then.
It seemed like Beomgyu managed to get his answer without needing Yeonjun to respond. He nodded and the stranger was pushed down to his knees. Both of the men in black took out their guns from their blazer and pointed it towards the stranger.
Immediately, Yeonjun let out a gasp at what was happening in front of him, completely horrified. “Beomgyu,” he called out weakly as his stomach dropped. This could not be good. He needed to stop this. Just because the man was harassing him did not mean that it warranted his death. That seemed a bit too extreme.
Beomgyu did not reply. Instead, he walked towards the stranger and stopped only a few inches from him. He seemed to be studying the man’s face carefully. Suddenly, the stranger spat right onto Beomgyu’s cheek.
If Yeonjun thought his stomach already dropped low enough, he was wrong. The feeling of dread was becoming stronger and he had no idea if there was anything he could do about it, especially when Beomgyu was not even listening to him.
Beomgyu remained unfazed, though. He did not even bother to wipe the spit from his face. Instead, he smirked as he looked at the stranger with hardened eyes. Yeonjun had never seen him look that way before and he frankly did not want to see it ever again as much as possible.
“You’ve been staring at my boyfriend ever since we entered the casino, haven’t you?” Beomgyu asked rhetorically, tilting his head to the side slightly. “I noticed you, you know. I thought you were just appreciating his beauty, and yeah, I get that. Yeonjun’s fucking pretty. But it’s something else, isn’t it?”
“I can’t fucking believe that you broke off your engagement with Minjeong for this whore,” the stranger sneered menacingly, revealing the real reason for his resentment towards Yeonjun.
As quick as lightning, Beomgyu’s hand struck the man’s face without an ounce of hesitation. Yeonjun flinched from the sound as he watched from a distance, unable to utter a single word now as fear engulfed his heart. He could only watch the exchange between them with widened eyes and shaky legs.
“Ah, of course you’re from La Vista. Only people from La Vista have such foul mouths,” Beomgyu remarked in a playful tone. Amidst his playfulness, Yeonjun could sense the threat looming overhead. “I’d suggest you watch your mouth while you’re on my turf, though, or you’ll end up with your tongue cut.”
The stranger did not say anything but his eyes still portrayed defiance.
“You know,” Beomgyu drawled as he stepped back, causing the stranger to relax slightly as if the worst was over, “you have such pretty eyes. I like them, really. So, I’ll let you go since I like your eyes.” The smirk on Beomgyu’s face was an obvious tell-tale sign that this was far from over, though. Then, he reached inside his pocket and took out a switchblade, flipping it open. With a sadistic grin etched on his lips, Beomgyu leaned closer before uttering, “But before I let you go, I think I’ll take one for myself first.”
Yeonjun watched the exact moment when the stranger’s face turned pale. By then, it was too late as Beomgyu already drove the blade right into his left eye with a loud disgusting squelch. Blood splattered down his face with some landing onto Beomgyu’s hand and sleeve, but Beomgyu just looked on with the same grin on his face as the man howled in pain.
“Good thing this room is soundproof,” Beomgyu laughed dismissively, as if he did not just cause a man to lose vision from one eye. He let go of the blade before walking towards Yeonjun. “You can keep the blade. Consider it a warning to La Vista. Tell your shit gang that if they dare to step into my territory again, I’ll kill the trespasser immediately. And the next fucking time you even so much as look into Yeonjun’s direction again, I’ll take your other eye.”
The stranger was still screaming relentlessly, clutching his left eye awkwardly as the blade was still lodged inside his eyeball. Yeonjun was sure that his own face was as pale as a sheet, too stunned to say a single word. The ruthless display of violence rendered him too speechless to speak. His legs felt too much like jelly right now. He did not even know how he was still standing on his two feet.
He watched as Beomgyu got nearer to him with his heart beating so loudly that he could have sworn everyone in the casino could hear it. The sadistic grin was gone from Beomgyu’s face now. Instead, he looked so much softer, like he did not just fucking maim a man in front of Yeonjun like it was fucking nothing.
In all honesty, Yeonjun could not believe what just happened. Everything was too quick and sudden. Beomgyu did not even bother to wait for any explanation. He just did as he pleased because he felt like it.
Once Beomgyu was close enough to Yeonjun, he asked softly, “Are you okay? Did he hurt you anywhere?”
It was then that everything became too overwhelming for Yeonjun. He could not do this. He could not just pretend like he was fine after seeing a man lost his eye by Beomgyu’s own hands; the same hands that had touched him so delicately, the same hands that held his whenever he needed it, the same hands that stroked his hair so lovingly.
Before Yeonjun even knew it, he doubled over and threw up, unable to take it anymore.
With much contrast to the cruelty he portrayed, Beomgyu caught him and held him up gently, allowing Yeonjun to lean on him for as long as he needed.
That was the first time that Yeonjun saw Beomgyu for who he truly was; being the best and worst person simultaneously, his cruelty and gentleness, his sadism and love.
“How long are you going to hold me as hostage?” Yeonjun asks once he is fully dressed in a black T-shirt and black sweatpants after his shower. This time around, he has ensured to bring his change of clothes inside the bathroom. Thank goodness, Beomgyu also decided to stop being ridiculous and gave him the space to shower without hounding him.
Stepping out of the bathroom, Yeonjun sees that Beomgyu is currently lounging on one of the kitchen stools with a phone in hand. He does not even look up when Yeonjun asks the question, as if he is too engrossed by whatever is on the screen.
Yeonjun clicks his tongue impatiently, unable to believe that Beomgyu really has the audacity to ignore his question even though he is the one who broke into his apartment in the first place to demand answers. The sound finally makes Beomgyu look up from his phone to raise an eyebrow at Yeonjun quizzically, as if asking him what he wants.
“I’m ordering food,” Beomgyu replies, pointedly ignoring the question Yeonjun uttered earlier. “Do you want anything?”
Yeonjun frowns in response. “Are you sure that that’s a wise decision? Wouldn’t it be suspicious if you order food on your account to my apartment?” he questions, perplexed.
At that, Beomgyu laughs. “I’m using your phone, silly,” he says as his eyes twinkle mirthfully.
It is then Yeonjun realises that the phone in Beomgyu’s hand is his. He does not know why he did not recognise it from its cute cover that even has cat ears on top, which he has been using for the past year.
Frankly, he does not know what to feel about his husband casually unlocking his phone and using it like nobody’s business. It is an infringement on his privacy and he sure hopes that Beomgyu does not find anything that he is not supposed to. He has no idea how the hell Beomgyu even figured out his passcode, really, because it was a bunch of random numbers with no significance or sentiment.
But then again, if Beomgyu managed to break into his apartment without a hitch, breaking into his phone should not be a big deal to him, either.
“Ah, I also sent a text to Taehyun to assure him that you’re safe. You might want to call him later, though. Proof of life or whatever, you know,” Beomgyu mentions casually as he shifts his eyes back to the screen.
Well, fuck.
Yeonjun does not know what to say at all. If Beomgyu sent a text to Taehyun, he probably went through Yeonjun’s other messages as well. He does not even know why he is so surprised right now. He should not be. He has always known that Beomgyu will never leave a rock unturned once he is onto something. He will scour the ends of the earth to figure out any clue.
“You sure you don’t want anything?” Beomgyu asks as his eyes flicker to Yeonjun, interrupting the internal panic that he is experiencing. “You should get something to eat, really. You’re in for a long ride.”
If it was not obvious before this, it is definitely obvious now. Beomgyu is purposely toying with him for the hell of it. Yeonjun still has no idea the main objective of Beomgyu coming here. His hypothesis says that he is trying to figure out the inner workings of his operation for intel so that he could either sell it or learn from it. But even then, if that were the case, Yeonjun would have been tied up and tortured for information. Instead, he has been walking around as a free man in his own apartment.
Unless Beomgyu thinks that he can get it out of him without resorting to force.
But that is impossible. Having spent five years by Beomgyu’s side, Yeonjun knows his husband too well. He knows the true extent of what Beomgyu is capable of. He knows the true ugliness that lies beneath his handsome face and large playful eyes. He knows that Beomgyu has no qualms about hurting even the people he loves when needed. If Beomgyu wants intel, he will get it in one way or another.
Yeonjun is not afraid, though.
When you have faced countless situations where you looked death right in the eye, nothing can faze you anymore. Yeonjun has probably almost died more than his two hands can count. He has long stopped being afraid of death because his mind has been trained to automatically assess the situation at hand and find the smartest way to survive.
It is all thanks to Beomgyu, really, that he turns out the way he is now; unflinching and bold even at the possibility of dying. As long as he remains calm, he will find a way to get out of this situation. He is sure of it.
In all honesty, he is more afraid of Beomgyu finding intel that he is not supposed to know than getting killed by his own husband. If the intel ever falls into Beomgyu’s lap, it means that everything Yeonjun has worked so hard for would be fucked. That is his biggest fear right now. While his phone does not contain sensitive information, he knows that there might be some things that allude to it. It is inevitable that something is overlooked because it is impossible to completely hide something perfectly, especially when he believed that Beomgyu and his network would be in prison for the rest of their lives.
“I’m ordering your favourite ramen for you, then,” Beomgyu says when Yeonjun still does not say anything.
Funny because Yeonjun does not think that he even has the appetite to eat right now. He does not protest, though. He knows that once Beomgyu has made up his mind on something, there is no use in trying to change it.
A few seconds later, when Beomgyu has placed their food order, he tosses the phone at Yeonjun. His heart jumps at the sudden movement, but luckily, Yeonjun manages to catch his phone before it falls. He immediately turns to glare at Beomgyu for treating his phone so carelessly, but Beomgyu simply cocks his head with his eyebrow raised.
Yeonjun sighs, hating that he has no choice but to comply currently. He dials Taehyun’s number.
The food arrives just as Yeonjun gets off the phone with Taehyun.
As expected, Taehyun is worried about him but he managed to assure his colleague that he is fine and will be fine, and no, there is no sign of Beomgyu so far, and yes, he will inform him immediately if he even sees a hint of Beomgyu. Somehow, he even managed to convince Taehyun not to send someone over to protect him because he is perfectly capable of protecting himself and he will make sure to stay in crowded places. He also promised to check in regularly to ease Taehyun’s mind.
He did all this under Beomgyu’s watchful eyes and the threat of his gun, which is still in his holster.
Yeonjun opens the door to get the food and closes it behind him. He places the plastic bags on the table before taking a seat on the stool opposite of Beomgyu.
“It’s been a while since we last had a meal together, hasn’t it?” Beomgyu muses as he opens the plastic bags and takes out the food containers. He places Yeonjun’s ramen on his side of the table and grabs his own food.
Yeonjun peers to see what Beomgyu got for himself only to find the same ramen that he ordered for him. “Are you here to kill me or to play house with me?” he asks, his voice laced with heavy sarcasm.
Beomgyu laughs in response as he hands the chopsticks over. “You don’t seem to be scared for someone who’s basically at gunpoint,” he replies in an amused tone.
“I stopped being scared of death after you sent me to that crack house and left me to die,” Yeonjun retorts as he takes the lid off his food container.
“You’re really bringing this up again?” Beomgyu questions, rolling his eyes. “I told you; I wouldn’t have sent you there unless I was confident that I could protect you. And I did protect you, didn’t I?”
“By making me believe that I was going to fucking die right there and then?” Yeonjun retorts as annoyance begins to seep in. Even though it happened in the beginning of their marriage, he finds that he is still unable to get over it. That incident was the first time that he ever faced death directly and it honestly changed him for life. It has become a point of conflict for them multiple times throughout their whole marriage and, even until now, he has yet to forgive Beomgyu for it.
“They were never going to hurt you,” Beomgyu replies, shrugging. “We were already in the midst of negotiation and I needed to give them something to bargain with.”
“And you used me, your own husband, as a fucking pawn,” Yeonjun says drily.
“That’s rich, coming from you,” Beomgyu quips as he mixes his ramen with his chopsticks. “You betrayed me, your own husband.”
Well, Yeonjun has nothing to say to that so he keeps his mouth shut. The look on Beomgyu’s face, however, irks him. He hates that his husband looks triumphant over winning this argument. All at once, he remembers their past arguments and how they said things to purposely piss each other off. It was just the way they worked. Yet, at the end of the day, no matter what happened, they were still by each other’s side.
Not wanting to reminisce memories that should no longer have any effect on him anymore, Yeonjun focuses his attention on the ramen. On usual days, he would have wolfed it all down quickly, but he really does not feel like eating right now. Even then, he knows that he needs to keep his energy up if he wants to survive this. So, he slowly takes his first bite.
Feeling Beomgyu’s eyes on him, Yeonjun looks up and arches his eyebrows questioningly. His husband just stares at him for a little while. Instead of the same triumphant look he had earlier, his eyes have visibly softened.
“Was it ever real to you?” Beomgyu asks in a quiet voice. Even though his eyes look vulnerable, he wears a guarded expression on his face. “Our marriage; did you ever consider it as real or was it all a lie?”
Unexpectedly, Yeonjun’s heart aches at the question. He drops his chopsticks into the container as he maintains eye contact with Beomgyu. “Don’t ask questions that will only hurt you, Gyu,” he says softly with a wistful smile on his lips. “There is no winning in this question, is there? If I say no, it was never real to me, you’d get hurt. If I say yes, everything between us was real, you’d get hurt too.”
“You underestimate me, Jun,” Beomgyu responds, still awaiting the answer earnestly.
“Believe it or not, I’ve never once underestimated you,” Yeonjun says truthfully. “When we first met, when you held me in your arms as I cried in front of you for the very first time, when you told me you loved me, when you asked me to marry you, when you showed me all your softer sides that you’d never allow anyone else to see, I’ve never once underestimated you. I’m fully aware of everything you’re capable of and I know everything about you. Trust me when I say that I know the answer would kill you.”
“So, let it kill me, then,” Beomgyu shrugs nonchalantly. “Wouldn’t that be better for you?”
Yeonjun chuckles softly and shakes his head. “No, it wouldn’t,” he denies.
“Why not?”
“Because I’m in a room with a man who makes sure that he’s the most dangerous person in every room he steps into,” Yeonjun answers without a hint of hesitation.
Beomgyu’s lips twitch into a smile.
It is true, they both know. That is how Beomgyu has survived for so long. That was how Beomgyu ran his whole organisation. That was how Beomgyu dealt with anyone who ever dared to fuck him over. That was how he got away from many situations. Beomgyu’s level of heartlessness and cruelty cannot be measured. He would do anything to get things done, regardless of what he needs to sacrifice. That was what made everyone so fearful of him. He is the most dangerous and craziest mafia boss in South Korea and no one else has ever reached his level yet, despite being arrested two years ago.
“Yet, you’re still not afraid of me right now,” Beomgyu remarks casually, tilting his head to the side.
Unexpectedly, Yeonjun’s annoyance flares at the statement. “Look, if you want to fucking kill me, just get it over with. I’m not allowed to share anything about the operation with you so you’ll never get a single thing from me about it. You’re just wasting your fucking time here,” he snaps, having had enough of whatever game Beomgyu is trying to play with him right now.
“Will you at least tell me about your life before you met me, then?” Beomgyu asks, completely unaffected by Yeonjun’s outburst.
For the rest of their meal, Yeonjun chooses to be silent, letting the question hang in the air between them.
It has been almost twenty hours since Yeonjun was first held hostage by his own husband.
Over the course of these twenty hours, Yeonjun has three things figured out:
First, his operation, although it was a huge success as he managed to bring down South Korea’s largest drug empire, was ultimately a failure. When he gathered all the evidence that he found during the time he spent as Beomgyu’s husband, he was absolutely sure that he mapped out everything accordingly. Every single piece of information was recorded, including the hierarchy of Thursday’s Child, the members and their roles, every asset they owned, every associate they had, every place they were paid to protect, every source of money they had; both legal and illegal ones.
The goal was to annihilate Thursday’s Child to the point of no return and he had naively thought that with Beomgyu behind the bars, the organisation would be in ashes. There was no one else Beomgyu could run to, no one else he could ask help from, no one else who could pull him out of the grave that Yeonjun buried him in.
Yeonjun was wrong.
Someone else still exists that Beomgyu can turn to for help and this person is powerful enough to pull off a whole prison escape. This fact should be terrifying but Yeonjun figures that he can try to get as much information as possible while Beomgyu keeps him alive and find a way to convey the message to Taehyun before he dies in his husband’s hands.
Second, Beomgyu is still a controlled man, despite facing the person he once loved with the whole of his heart only to be betrayed. His husband has been exercising restraint from the very first time Yeonjun returned to his apartment. It is a given, he supposes, as the head of a crime organisation, to be completely rational and logical when dealing with difficult situations. Beomgyu has never once let his emotions take over him. For someone who inflicts harm on others voluntarily and enjoys doing it, Beomgyu is emotionally intelligent. He has always been able to read people’s emotions easily and he uses it to his advantage. He has great control over his own emotions too.
In all honesty, Yeonjun has never once seen Beomgyu lose control. Even when he was facing a huge crisis back then, he kept his emotions in check. There were bursts of frustration, of course, but it never clouded his judgement to the point that he could not keep it under wraps. Every single move he made was calculated and weighed between the pros and cons.
It is surprising, really, how Beomgyu has yet to hurt him. He is faced with the very person who ruined his whole organisation, after all. The amount of anger he possesses for Yeonjun must have been intense. He could have done it so easily too; he has a gun in his possession that he has never once taken out so far. The fact that he has yet to even yell at Yeonjun for betraying him shows how much self-control he has.
Frankly, Yeonjun finds Beomgyu’s amount of self-control scary because he has never seen the person that Beomgyu is when he snaps.
Third, Beomgyu believes that he has the upper hand in this situation. That much is obvious in the way he carries himself. He has never once looked terrified or nervous while being in Yeonjun’s apartment. Hell, he does not even bother to properly threaten Yeonjun with his gun. Even his interrogation is not laced with grave threat. It is merely questions that Yeonjun has the choice to answer or ignore.
Yeonjun knows that given his freedom to move around in his apartment, he can actually find a way to send a signal to Taehyun or escape. That would probably be the wisest decision to make and he should do it. Yet, here he is looking at Beomgyu who is leaning back against his study chair and reading through one of the many journals he keeps to record his dreams.
His instincts tell him not yet. Beomgyu is keeping him alive for a reason and he wants to find out why first. If he were to tell Taehyun, his colleague would have insisted to ambush his apartment immediately.
Even then, Beomgyu is not doing much interrogation ever since they had their meal. It is grating, honestly, how Beomgyu prefers to spend his time here in silence when he is not asking too many questions. He simply takes things from Yeonjun’s apartment as he pleases and looks through everything, as if he owns this place.
Well, as the head of Thursday’s Child, Beomgyu has always acted like every place he goes to belongs to him.
Yeonjun knows that he needs to do something to gain Beomgyu’s trust again. Beomgyu will never fully trust him again, he knows, but he needs to try to get close to him, anyway. If he can just get his husband to reveal who the person backing him up is, he can end his operation properly this time without any loose ends.
Perhaps, if it were any other person, they would have been able to come up with a better idea than this. Unfortunately, it is him who is faced with this situation right now and he can only come up with one way to make Beomgyu trust him again, or at the very least, lower his guard around him.
“Beomgyu,” he calls out softly, causing Beomgyu to look up. “You asked me if our marriage was ever real to me, didn’t you?”
Beomgyu looks at him with a blank expression on his face.
“I can’t answer that but I can show you what was real between us, though,” Yeonjun drawls as his lips curl into a smirk. That seems to catch Beomgyu’s attention as the latter looks more alert now, trying to figure out what Yeonjun means.
With deliberate slow steps, Yeonjun walks over to where Beomgyu is sitting. This is probably the closest that he has gotten to him ever since Beomgyu broke into his apartment. He places both of his hands on Beomgyu’s shoulders delicately before situating himself right on top of Beomgyu’s lap.
For the first time in the past twenty hours, Beomgyu looks taken aback by the current situation, as if he has not prepared himself for this at all. His arms lay by his sides with one hand still holding Yeonjun’s dream journal as his gaze turns questioning. It is satisfying to see his usual calm demeanour crack, even a little.
Yeonjun shifts his hips to make himself comfortable on Beomgyu’s lap. To be completely honest, this is a gamble. He has no idea if Beomgyu would even succumb to his blatant seduction technique, but he knows that Beomgyu is still physically attracted to him, judging by the way he stared at him last night while he was changing.
The gun in Beomgyu’s holster is digging into Yeonjun’s thigh, but he ignores it as he cups Beomgyu’s face gently between his hands. He looks directly into Beomgyu’s eyes as he leans in closer until their lips are an inch shy of touching.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Beomgyu murmurs as his eyes darken. He leans back, creating a distance between their lips.
Yeonjun’s smirk turns wider as he grinds down right on Beomgyu’s cock, causing his husband to jolt slightly. “Showing you what was real between us,” he answers, batting his eyelashes innocently. “I wouldn’t have let you fuck me back then if I didn’t find you hot and attractive.”
At that, Beomgyu barks out an incredulous laugh. “Oh, yeah?” he replies with an eyebrow arched as his hands now settle on Yeonjun’s waist after putting the dream journal aside on the table. “I thought it was all just a part of your act as my husband.” His hands begin to rub his waist lightly, just like he used to back then.
“No, it wasn’t,” Yeonjun says as he continues to grind his ass down. He can feel Beomgyu’s cock stir in interest as it slowly gets harder. He admits, “It was real. Every single fucking time I begged for your cock was real. Every time I cried when you fucked me dumb was real.”
“Fuck,” Beomgyu curses as his eyes turn even darker with lust than they already are. The grip on Yeonjun’s waist tightens. “Your mouth is still so fucking filthy. You always say the filthiest shit like it’s nothing.”
Yeonjun grins, knowing that he has Beomgyu right where he wants him. “You should do something about it, then,” he remarks carelessly, knowing which button he is pushing and what will entail.
As expected, Beomgyu pushes Yeonjun off his lap and manoeuvres him onto his knees right in between his legs. All at once, memories come rushing back at him. He remembers all the times he spent in this exact position, all the times Beomgyu murmured sweet nothings into his ears, all the times they were tangled in each other’s body.
Well, this started off as a mere play to get Beomgyu to lower his guard around him, but Yeonjun can feel himself getting turned on too. With nimble fingers, Yeonjun tugs on Beomgyu’s belt, signalling that he wants it off. His husband smirks in return before he grabs the gun from his holster for the first time since their reunion. Then, with the gun in his hand, he unbuckles his belt and lifts his hips up so that Yeonjun can take his pants and boxers off.
Now that Beomgyu’s lower half is completely bare, Yeonjun takes a hold of his semi-erection into his hands carefully. He runs his fingers all over Beomgyu’s cock before wrapping both of his hands around it. He begins pumping Beomgyu’s cock slowly while giving it occasional strokes. It has been quite some time since he last saw Beomgyu’s cock and seeing the girth of it once again reminds him of how good sex felt with him back then.
Yeonjun continues to rub Beomgyu’s cock with his hands while picking up the pace. He grins when he hears Beomgyu’s heavy breathing and soft moans. It has been too long since he last heard those and it makes him feel pleased to know that he still has the same effect on Beomgyu like he did back then.
Eventually, Beomgyu’s cock is fully erected, all thanks to Yeonjun’s ministrations. Yet, he continues to tease his husband by lightly touching him with his fingers, playfully withholding pleasure. He even leans forward to press his lips against Beomgyu’s cock, kissing it lightly.
It seems like Beomgyu has had enough because the next thing Yeonjun knows, he feels the cool barrel of Beomgyu’s gun against his head.
Yeonjun lets out a small gasp as he looks up at Beomgyu, wide-eyed and surprised. Shivers run down his spine as they make eye contact. His husband looks down at him from where he is sitting with a cold expression on his face. He tilts his head to the side and commands, “Go on, then. Suck me off or I’ll blow your brains out.”
The threat sends a thrill throughout Yeonjun’s body. He can feel himself shaking from excitement as he brings his face closer to Beomgyu’s cock with the gun still pressed against his head. He darts his tongue out to lick experimentally across the prominent vein on Beomgyu’s cock. He fights back a grin when Beomgyu lets out a huge moan. He continues to give his cock more kitten licks here and there.
Deciding that he needs Beomgyu’s cock in his mouth right at this moment, he wraps his lips around the tip as he suckles on it lightly. He holds the remaining part of Beomgyu’s cock with his hand before taking more of it inside his mouth. He swirls his tongue around the cock, occasionally licking stripes on it. He hears the way Beomgyu groan as his free hand begins to tangle itself in Yeonjun’s hair.
It has been quite some time since Yeonjun last sucked Beomgyu off but it seems like his muscle memory has kicked in because he instinctively knows what to do to make Beomgyu feel good. Beomgyu has always liked it wet and messy so he makes sure to slurp around his cock while taking more of it inside until it is completely in. The tip of Beomgyu’s cock is practically lodged at the back of his throat and Yeonjun lets it remain there without gagging.
Well, spending five years with Beomgyu as his husband means that his gag reflex has been fucked out of him permanently to accommodate Beomgyu’s size. Even though they have not touched each other in two years, Yeonjun can feel that his own body is very much still attuned to Beomgyu’s.
“So fucking pretty,” Beomgyu whispers softly as his hand threads through Yeonjun’s hair, still holding the gun to Yeonjun’s head.
Loving the encouragement, Yeonjun starts bobbing his head up and down, making sure that his tongue reaches every inch of Beomgyu’s cock. The gun against his head just makes him even more determined to draw out more pleased noises from Beomgyu’s lips. He even hums softly around Beomgyu’s cock to send vibrations around it, which causes Beomgyu to toss his head back and let out a long groan.
It is not a surprise when Beomgyu says breathlessly, “I’m gonna come.”
Having been trained enough to know what exactly Beomgyu needs, Yeonjun stays still as soon as he hears the words. Beomgyu then tightens his hold on Yeonjun’s hair with one hand while the other is still pressing the gun against his head. He begins thrusting in and out of Yeonjun’s mouth slowly, as if to test the waters first.
Yeonjun allows himself to go slack and be used as Beomgyu pleases as he goes faster. The tip keeps hitting the back of his throat each time Beomgyu thrusts in and Yeonjun just leaves it be, completely pliant under Beomgyu’s command. So many years ago, before he even met Beomgyu, he knew that some guys loved it when he gagged while getting face-fucked because it is an ego boost to their size.
However, with Beomgyu, it is completely different. Beomgyu likes the smooth pace without being interrupted. It allows him to go as rough as he wants, without having to be too careful, just like right now.
“Fuck, you’re still such a fucking cockslut. My fucking cockslut. Always so desperate for my cock, aren’t you?” Beomgyu says in a low tone, never once letting go of Yeonjun’s hair. “Tell me, when I was in prison because of you, did you let anyone else fuck you?”
The question causes Yeonjun’s face to flush red. He tries to shake his head no but to no avail as Beomgyu is still fucking his mouth as he pleases. The pace continues without a pause and Yeonjun finds himself helpless as all he can do is just kneel there and take as much as Beomgyu wants to give him.
“I’m coming,” Beomgyu grunts as his pace begins to slow down. “You’d better fucking swallow everything or you’re dead.”
Right after he says it, Yeonjun feels warm liquid trickling down his throat as Beomgyu’s thrusts come to a stop. He tries his best to swallow everything, relaxing his throat to ensure that everything goes down. When Beomgyu finally pulls out, Yeonjun sucks in a deep breath before letting it out slowly. He is taken by surprise when Beomgyu rubs the remnants of his cum which is on the tip of his cock against his cheek before lightly slapping his cock right on the cheek repeatedly.
Yeonjun whines softly as his face flushes red at the blatant humiliation. Despite his whines, he can feel his pants getting tighter. The familiar haze that he has not felt in ages is beginning to cloud his mind and he knows that if this goes on, he will slip into a headspace that he has long forgotten exists.
As if sensing this change, Beomgyu rubs his cock against Yeonjun’s cheek one final time before he helps the latter up onto his feet as he stands up. “Such a pretty kitten, aren’t you?” he coos as he places the gun on Yeonjun’s study table.
Right now, Yeonjun does not feel like his body is his own. He simply allows Beomgyu to push him onto the bed. As he lays flat on the bed, he watches with wide eyes while Beomgyu takes his shirt off, leaving him bare. Then, he climbs on the bed, caging Yeonjun in between his arms and legs. With surprising gentleness, Beomgyu slowly removes Yeonjun’s clothes until he is completely naked, staring up at him deep under the haze.
“Are you with me, baby?” Beomgyu asks in a soft voice as he leans down to press a kiss on Yeonjun’s forehead.
A soft noise escapes Yeonjun’s lips. He is still aware of everything that is going on. He just feels too floaty right now. His fingers curl around Beomgyu’s biceps to signal him that it is alright to continue even if he cannot find the words to say it.
“Did I push you too far?” Beomgyu asks as he presses kisses all over Yeonjun’s face down to his neck. “Do you want to stop?”
Yeonjun tries his best to shake his head no. He has handled way worse than this back then. This is nothing.
It seems like the small movement is detected by Beomgyu because the latter hums reassuringly in response. Yeonjun can only lie down there as Beomgyu continues to whisper praises into his ear while kissing every inch of his skin affectionately. Like this, he feels safe and protected. Beomgyu always knows the right thing to say whenever Yeonjun slips under.
It is then he remembers Beomgyu’s promise to him on the day they got married. “You’re mine and I’m yours, now and forever. I swear on my life that I’ll always take care of you and protect you from harm,” Beomgyu had vowed back then.
Because as heartless as Beomgyu is, as cruel as he is, he has never once let Yeonjun get hurt. Even right now, he is taking care of Yeonjun so well.
Finally finding the strength as the haze clears a little bit, Yeonjun wraps his arms around Beomgyu’s neck and brings him closer. He presses his lips against Beomgyu’s gently while his eyes close. Beomgyu kisses him right back and their lips perfectly meld into each other, as if they were made for each other. The kiss is slow, gentle and lovely, totally unlike the state of their marriage now.
For a moment, Yeonjun feels loved. It has been too long since he last felt this way. Beomgyu’s lips are soft and familiar. His arms are comforting and his body is warm. Fuck, Yeonjun has missed this so much, even if he would never admit it out loud.
It is a dizzying realisation, honestly. This is getting softer than it should. All those soft moments that they shared back then should not integrate into their current situation. This is entirely a different circumstance. Yeonjun needs to get out of this haze completely before he does something that he will regret later.
So, he forces himself to pull Beomgyu’s head back by his hair to meet his eyes. Beomgyu looks surprised by the sudden pull but he stays quiet even if his eyebrows are raised challengingly.
“Fuck me,” Yeonjun demands, even if his voice comes out as whiny and breathless. “You don’t need to be gentle with me. I want you to fuck me, please.”
Beomgyu chuckles almost fondly, even as his eyes rake over Yeonjun’s body hungrily. Despite the obvious lust, he chooses to say in a light tone, “You haven’t answered my question yet, though. Did anybody else fuck you while I was in prison?”
Although Beomgyu puts on a light demeanour for his question, his eyes tell a different story. It is not just a simple yes or no question. For as long as Yeonjun has known him, Beomgyu has always been possessive of him. His husband has done unspeakable things to people who dared to harass him. Yeonjun knows that if he says yes to this question, Beomgyu will demand a list of names and murder every single person on the list.
Lucky for them, Yeonjun is not lying as he answers, “No. I’ve only ever used dildos and my own fingers while you were in prison.”
The satisfaction on Beomgyu’s face is unmistakable. Yeonjun gasps when his husband leans into his neck only to clamp his teeth down on a spot where he is the most sensitive. He whines as Beomgyu sucks on the spot to leave a mark. His whole body writhes in both pain and pleasure as Beomgyu continues to leave behind marks all over his neck, moving further towards his shoulder each time. Yeonjun tilts his head to ease the access to his neck, craving for more.
“Good,” Beomgyu says when he lifts his head up with a satisfied grin etched on his lips. “I’m the only person who’s allowed to fuck you.”
“Do it, then. Fuck me already,” Yeonjun quips, growing impatient now that he is almost fully up from the haze. “There’s lube in the drawer.”
Beomgyu reaches over to the bedside table and grabs the bottle of lube from the drawer. Yeonjun watches silently as he slicks his fingers up with the lube. He lets out a soft moan when he feels Beomgyu’s finger prod at his entrance. The first finger enters and Yeonjun tries his best not to tense up, having not taken anything up his ass for quite some time. Beomgyu thrusts his finger in and out of his hole for a little while before adding in another finger as he looks directly at Yeonjun’s face, as if trying to see if it causes any discomfort.
This time around, the stretch is slightly harder to adjust to. Beomgyu begins scissoring him and Yeonjun feels his toes curl from the pleasure each time Beomgyu’s fingers almost brush against his sweet spot. It seems like Beomgyu knows exactly what he is doing as he purposely avoids that spot with a sadistic grin on his lips.
Soon, a third finger joins and Yeonjun finds himself unable to hold back. He starts moving his hips to allow Beomgyu to thrust his fingers easily. He even tries to shift his hips so that Beomgyu’s fingers will hit right at his prostate but Beomgyu uses his other hand to push his hips down and stop him from moving at all.
By this time, Yeonjun’s lips continuously emit moans as he desperately wants more. It has been too long and he needs more. He wants to feel full, he wants to feel something inside him, he needs Beomgyu to fill him up like he always did back then. The fingers are not sufficient to appease his desires but he still whines at the loss when Beomgyu pulls his fingers out.
“Shh, I’m going to fuck you now like you asked,” Beomgyu assures as he coats his cock with the lube, spreading it all over the girth generously.
Then, with his hands on Yeonjun’s waist, Beomgyu lines his cock up right at Yeonjun’s entrance. Unable to help himself, a loud moan escapes Yeonjun’s lips at the feeling. He does not recall the last time he had Beomgyu’s cock inside him and he cannot wait to feel the familiar sensation all over again.
Yeonjun tosses his head back and arches his back once the tip of Beomgyu’s cock penetrates him. Beomgyu pushes more of his cock inside, not bothering to slow down, until his cock is now completely sheathed inside. Without even waiting for Yeonjun to fully adjust to the size, Beomgyu starts moving, causing him to groan loudly.
Not even given a moment to pause, Yeonjun gets exactly what he requested as Beomgyu pounds into him without reprieve. He can only lay there and take it with his legs spread out and fingers clutching the bedsheets. Wanton moans escape his lips every single time Beomgyu thrusts inside. The way Beomgyu is holding his waist so tightly makes Yeonjun think that there will probably be his handprints later as the grip gets tighter each time.
Even then, Yeonjun begs with tears in his eyes, “Harder, please. Fuck, more, more, please. I can take it. I need more.”
The pace speeds up and Yeonjun swears that he can almost see the stars from how hard he is being drilled. Much to his surprise, Beomgyu lifts both of his legs up and drapes them over his shoulders, allowing easier access to his hole. From this new angle, Yeonjun’s prostate is hit each time Beomgyu thrusts his cock inside, causing him to let out high-pitched whines endlessly.
“Still such a fucking slut for my cock,” Beomgyu remarks in between his thrusts with a satisfied smirk on his face, which only serves to rile Yeonjun up even more.
“Please, please, please,” Yeonjun continues to beg, even if he has no idea what he is begging for at this point. Everything is simply so overwhelming and he is reduced to nothing but a babbling mess, begging and pleading with tears rolling down his cheeks.
Wanting more, Yeonjun wraps his arms around Beomgyu’s neck and pulls him in again for a kiss. This time around, the kiss is messy and rough and their teeth clack at times but Yeonjun feels too good to care. In this position, Beomgyu can no longer fully thrust in and out of his hole properly. Instead, Beomgyu begins rolling his hips, sending all sorts of pleasure that Yeonjun has not felt in so long.
Yeonjun tangles his fingers into Beomgyu’s hair and presses his lips even harder against Beomgyu’s lips. He nips on Beomgyu’s lower lip, trying to sneak his tongue inside. Unfortunately, Beomgyu pushes his own tongue against Yeonjun’s and slips it inside his mouth, devouring him completely. The sensation of having his breath stolen away and the continuous stimulation on his prostate causes Yeonjun to feel dizzy as he grips the sheets even tighter to ground himself back in reality.
It is then Beomgyu pulls away from the kiss. Yeonjun tries to chase after his lips but Beomgyu has other plans. He gasps when he feels one of Beomgyu’s hands around his neck this time, stopping him from chasing any further. His head is pushed back against the pillow and Yeonjun stares up at Beomgyu who is looking down at him with a cold expression.
Now that they are apart, the thrusts are beginning to pick up once again and, with Beomgyu’s cock pressed against his sweet spot, Yeonjun can feel his brain turn into mush. Everything feels too good, really, and he knows that his own cock is practically leaking right now, begging to be touched. It is painful yet pleasurable at the same time, but he is too lost in the way Beomgyu is fucking him just the right way he needs to care about it.
Yeonjun moans when the hand around his neck begins squeezing, slowly cutting his airways off. It is the wrong technique, he knows. The airways are not supposed to be cut off but one look at Beomgyu’s face tells him that this is intentional. Perhaps, this is how he is going to die; with Beomgyu’s cock inside him and his hand crushing his windpipe. All he can do right at this moment is to lay there and take everything that Beomgyu wants to give him. He does not even fight back or struggle to survive.
Before he knows it, Beomgyu’s hand squeezes his neck even tighter, causing dark spots to fill his vision. It is also right at this moment when Beomgyu hits his prostate dead-on, sending waves of indescribable pleasure all over his body. Unable to control himself, Yeonjun’s body shakes as he comes untouched just from all the overwhelming sensations, shooting semen all over his chest and stomach. Everything feels too good as he keeps coming, unable to stop himself.
It is easily the most intense orgasm he has had in a long while.
Yeonjun takes in a deep breath when Beomgyu’s hand is no longer around his neck, but his relief is cut short when Beomgyu continues to fuck him through his orgasm, not even giving him a single minute of rest. The overstimulation is painful but Yeonjun likes it. Even when his whole body is shaking and trying to recover from the orgasm, Beomgyu continues to grip his waist tightly and fuck into him relentlessly, hitting his prostate each time. He feels like a mere doll for Beomgyu to use at this moment.
Once the orgasm has worn off, Yeonjun feels exhausted and his body goes limp, leaving Beomgyu to do as he pleases. He does not know how long it takes as he has begun to slip into the same haze once again but eventually, Beomgyu’s hips stutter and he spills his seeds inside. Then, he feels rough hands around his cock, stroking him to completion for the second time. Yeonjun honestly does not know when he even got hard again after his first orgasm, too lost in his haze.
Everything is blurry afterwards. Yeonjun knows that Beomgyu is whispering sweet nothings while moving around the apartment. He feels a wet cloth on his body, wiping down his chest, stomach and ass. Eventually, he feels his own body being gathered into Beomgyu’s arms and warmth envelops him.
It has been so long since he last fell this deep into subspace. But then again, they started off with an intense play right off the bat instead of easing into it after not touching each other for two years. Yeonjun should not be surprised that he fell under so hard. He never planned for it to happen and he would prefer it if it does not happen at all.
It is crazy, though. This shit is crazy. Getting involved with Beomgyu in the first place was already crazy enough as it was. But now, Yeonjun is the one willingly allowing his husband to fuck him dumb all over again. That is crazy. He is crazy for this, really, but he needs to do it if he wants to survive. Sex is a great tool for manipulation.
Next time, he needs to make sure that he does not fall under a little too hard.
The craziest thing of all is how safe and protected he feels in Beomgyu’s arms when he finally comes up. The softness of Beomgyu’s eyes as he peers at Yeonjun with what looks like concern in his eyes is surprising. Yeonjun does not know what to feel about it.
“Are you okay?” Beomgyu asks gently.
It is right then that the fourth realisation hits him:
In Beomgyu’s mind, they are still married and not just in the legal sense. In the emotional and physical sense, Beomgyu still considers them married. In some twisted way, in spite of everything Yeonjun has done, Beomgyu still cherishes him as his spouse.
Yeonjun knows that he needs to exploit this if he wants to get out of this situation alive.
That is, if he does not lose himself first.