Rhythm Of Us

by Trashcan135

Summary:

Carter Bailey's family decides to move after the scare of his attempt and for so called "work opportunities", Carter who is new to town gets invited to a high school party, to which he attends where he meets a wasted Sydney Knee who he decides to help after she just found out her boyfriend was cheating on her. One thing leads to another, and Sydney asks him to be her dance partner for an upcoming dance competition. Will he take her up on that offer?

Notes:

Author's Note

______________________________________

Hi, I'm Author. I'm sorry if the summary sounds bad. I had to make it shorter than it originally was. Also, please comment so I know people are engaging with my story. I don't mind if you have any criticism to comment actually, I would appreciate it if you do have any criticism. It helps me grow as an author. Just don't be flat out rude about it.

Also, you can find my work on Wattpad under trashcan135 or the same name as the book on here if you would also like to read it on there. Oh and you can keep up to date with the story on my Tumblr under platinumrivertribute

P.S. I'm sorry for any grammatical errors or spelling mistakes. I do proofread it, but sometimes it still slips my mind.

Chapter 1

Carter's pov 3:45pm Aug 12th

__________

 

I watch as the rain drops run with a quick pace down our car window. As I hear my sister Kylie bitching about the move, so I listen in.

 

"Ugh, it is all your fault we have to move," she says in disgust. She turns to look at me, but I stay silent. She continues to complain anyway. 

 

“How can it be my fault? Mom has clearly said multiple times that we are moving because of their job offer.” I say that, even though I know she's probably right.

 

She gives me a uh huh."Why can't you just be normal?" I turn to look at her.

 

‘Why can't I be normal? Well, I can't be normal. I can't help it that I was born this way. Trust me, if I had a choice, I wouldn't have chosen the harder path in life.’

 

I say, "You're just embarrassed to be related to me," with a smirk. She squinted as she looked at me.

 

“Hell, yeah, I'm embarrassed to be related to you.” She looks me up and down. “I mean, look at you? Who do you think you're fooling with this “I'm a real boy” get up. It's pathetic. I mean do you really think anyone would actually fall for that. You barely pass for a preteen, definitely not a teenager. You think you can make it through the school year without anyone finding out?”

 

As I'm thinking about what to say to that, Mom cuts me off. "You two stop it this instant!" Mom shouts. I glared at her, so she stuck her tongue out just to taunt me. 

 

She decided to test mom's patience and continue. "But, Mom–why should we have to move because the freak tried to end it?" 

 

My eyes widened in shock, and my stomach turned. That hit a little deeper than I would have liked it to, but I quickly composed myself again.

 

"Kylie Bailey, that is enough from you!" "You will not say such things about your sis–" She stops herself. "I mean, uh... sibling." 

 

I sigh and turn back to the window.

 

"Besides, uh, Carter? Is right. We are moving because your father and I both were offered a job opportunity that we couldn't pass up. Not because of the uh... incident," she said with caution in her tone.

 

"Sure–" my sister said sarcastically.

 

"I don't want to hear another word from the both of you for the rest of the car ride, you got that?" We both nod.

 

It was still raining so I went back to watching the rain drops on our car window and drift into thought, when I'm reminded of why we moved.

 

I woke up to a bright light in my eyes. The smell of antiseptics filled my nose.

 

Beep. Hum–. Beep. Hum–.

 

The beeping and humming are coming from the heart monitor and fluorescent lights which had blinded me just a second ago. That's when it hits me. 

 

I'm Alive.

 

Thump. Thump. Thump.

 

My heart rate starts to race. All I can hear is that sound and some sitcom playing on the tv. I try to slow my breathing but I'm taken back by the pain in my throat. I assume it came from where they had to pump my stomach to remove the pills I had swallowed. 

 

I put my hand to my chest trying to catch my breath. There is a slight sting when I go to move my hand. I look down and see an IV in my hand. 

 

What have I done? The urge to run comes over me. But, I CAN'T! there's no way they would let me leave now. Not after what I did. 

 

I look around to see if anyone can see me spiral.

 

The reality of my situation starts to sink in. I'm screwed! My entire school already knows about it . Meaning my parents know. I can't go back to that life. 

 

“Freak.” “Weirdo.” “Deceiver.”

 

Those words haunt my mind. ‘What am I—going to do.’ I catch my breath. ‘My reputation is tarnished. How am I supposed to go on living? When everything worth living for has been taken from me.’

 

I look over at the doorway. And see Mom, Dad, the Doctor. I could barely hear their voices at first. 

 

“...She's lucky you guys were there, if it weren't for both of you she might be here right now.”

 

I then see Kylie, behind them. She looked as if she was pissed to be here like this whole ordeal is inconveniencing her.

 

My parents, on the other hand, looked distressed. Their eyes had dark circles, bloodshot as well. 

 

When they noticed I was now awake, they rushed to my bedside. They stayed quiet and so did I, because if we spoke it would mean acknowledging what had happened, and none of us were ready for that. 

 

Mom broke the silence first. 

 

"Oh, honey, why didn't you confide in us?" she asked quietly, her voice shaking as a single tear ran down her face. 

 

‘I don't know, maybe it's because you wouldn't understand or even try to listen. You would just brush me off like usual, so after a while, I stopped trying.’ I thought to myself. 

 

Kylie interrupts, "Ugh, why can't you guys see that this is all an act for attention? First, she manipulates and deceives a girl from school. Then she dares to play the victim. It's disgusting! And now you're giving her the attention she clearly wants! It's bullshit!"

 

Dad's voice was breaking as he yelled. 

 

"Kylie, this act for attention was clearly a cry for help!” A tear begins to form at the corner of his eyelid. “We can see that, now. But we should've seen it sooner! I’m ashamed of you–of all of us for letting go this far. For never noticing-” His voice trembled, as the tear finally made its way down his face. This is one of the few times I had seen him cry. "We wouldn't know what to do if we lost either of you." He concluded, looking between both of us. 

 

She rolled her eyes and stormed out of the room.

 

It was quiet for a moment. I bit down on my lip trying to hold back the tears. 

 

As I'm regaining my senses. A single tear ran down my face, it was warm, unlike the cold car window I was resting my head on. With that, I fell asleep.

 

Carter pov 5:00pm

_________

 

I'm awakened by the car stopping. I rub my eyes, still tired.

 

I gaze out the car window to see our new house. It looked like most suburban homes, it's a two story house. The first story was brick, and the second had white siding. 

 

I got out of the car to stretch from the long car ride and waited for the moving van and movers to arrive.

 

They arrived shortly after. 

 

"Honey, could you help me with those boxes please?" Mom said, looking at me for a response. 

 

"Yes ma'am." I walk over to the moving van and grab a couple of boxes.

 

On top of one of the was a picture of me and my sister hugging our dog Sadie. We were all sweaty and muddy and we had the silliest little expressions on our faces.

We could have stayed there all day if Mom and Dad let us.

 

It's funny how times change. One minute, you're best friends who share everything. And the next, she's whispering about you in the halls. Pretending you don't exist. 

 

It probably all started in middle school. That's when my sister started to care more about what her “clique” thought, then she did me. 

 

What hurts the most is that not only did she abandon me. She was also joining in on the rumors as well. All of this was going on while I was at one of the worst and confusing times of my life. And that wasn't enough for her. She just had to join in on the jabs and remarks from her friends. If I–didn't already hate myself. I surely did after that. 

 

Mom and Dad were too busy with work to notice. So, I just chose to stay quiet and ignore her. Or at least, I try to ignore her.

 

When I finished downstairs, I started on my room upstairs. All my furniture has been moved upstairs. I just have to move it to where I want it to go. So I spent the next thirty minutes doing so. 

 

Now I've just got to tackle these boxes. I start by opening the box labeled. Carter's stuff. I know, very original of me. I start by putting up some knick-knacks. And for some reason I stuffed one of my gaming controllers in this box instead of Gaming stuff. Again, very original. But it's a good thing I didn't lose it.

 

Vrr, Vrr, Vrr

 

My phone starts to vibrate as a notification goes off. I walk over and pause the music on my playlist.

 

"How's the move going?" It was from one of my best friends, Rohan. 

 

I met him and his girlfriend at an online LGBTQ support group. That I obviously, didn't tell my parents about. 

 

We found out that we didn't live that far from each other, so we decided to meet up. 

 

We've been close friends ever since, just the three of us, hanging out. I don't know when we started to feel like family, but we did. 

 

It did suck, when I became a third wheel. But I mean, I was the one to introduce them. So it is kinda on me, I'm happy for them, nonetheless. 

 

I mean I can't really complain when they're the only ones who stuck by my side when I came out. They understood me. They listened to me. They were there for me. They believed me. THEY saw the real me when others couldn't. And even though we don't have the same experiences, they could understand me since they're also trans. 

 

My parents, on the other hand, didn't believe me and they just brushed it off. Like it was some phase, or me just starting to rebel. 

 

My sister already hated me, and this just gave her another reason to do so.

 

Carter: "Okay. So far. Just exhausted from the moving boxes and furniture."

 

Rohan: "I feel you. That must suck."

 

Rohan: “But, I for one, think a change in environment will be good for you.” 

 

Rohan: “Since the ‘incident’.” "Promise to talk to SOMEONE if it gets like that again." 

 

Carter: "K, but the same goes for you."

 

Rohan: "K."

 

Carter: "I'll talk to you later. I have to finish packing."

 

Rohan: "K, talk to you later."

 

I put my phone down and finished unpacking the box labeled “Carter's stuff”. When I finished with everything I headed downstairs.

 

Dad asks. "Hey, kiddo, we're going to order pizza since we don't have groceries yet. Is that good with you?" I nod. 

 

I nod. I'm not one to complain especially to my parents. Faster this is over with. The sooner I can be in my room, alone. 

 

When the pizza arrived, we sat at the table. Silently eating. I can barely bear the silence. I try to look at their faces. But I can't. They're my family, but somehow I feel so estranged. Their gazes feel suffocating.

 

"May I be excused, I'm exhausted from moving in," I say. 

 

Mom replies with "Yes, you may." 

 

I walk upstairs and slide down my door. 

 

Hah, Ha, Hah, Ha 

 

I try to slow my breathing. But my vision starts to go dark before it clears again. I stand up and brush off my pants. I could feel the exhaustion start to come over me. 

 

So I head to my bed and plop myself down on it. I didn't try bothering with the sheets. I fell asleep immediately after I hit the bed.

 

Two Weeks later.

 

Carter's pov 6:30am Aug 26th

____________

 

I woke up from the irritating sound of my alarm pulsating through my ears. I rubbed my eyes. Desperately trying to wake up enough to shut off that damn alarm.

 

Why did I even set that stupid alarm in the first place? As I'm now looking at my phone screen. I see the answer to my question. "First day, so get your ass up." 

 

Oh right, that's why. It's my first day of school today. 

 

I'm starting school about two weeks late. But it was nice having that time off to get settled in. 

 

My gaze shifts down to my legs and I see the cutest furball lying on them. We couldn't all fit in the car, so we had a family member bring her. 

 

Ugh, I really don't want to wake you up, but I need to get ready. 

 

I gently move her off my legs. While debating staying in bed with my pup forever. I would just have to quit school or do it online.

 

I then make my way to the bathroom. I start by brushing then flossing my teeth. 

 

As I'm taking off my clothes, I catch sight of my reflection in the mirror. 

 

My gaze shifts from my face to my breast. They're perky. One is a little bigger than the other. Not like I care. I don't even want them in the first place. My gaze follows that line down to my hips. There's only a slight curve since I’m quite thin.

 

My relationship with my body is complicated. Like, I don't hate my body. But, I don't love it either. I often feel trapped. Like I'm in a skin tight layer of saran wrap, I'm trying to claw my way out of. And other times I feel like I'm wearing a loose piece of itchy fabric that you barely notice but it catches you off guard occasionally

 

I walk over to the shower. And run the water. I shampoo and condition my hair. And I finish up with lathering up my body with soap and rinse. 

 

Then I move on to my skin care routine. Yes, I do skin care. No I do not care if it is stereotypical for guys to not know how to properly take care of their skin, or they just don't because it is “girly”. But I say fuck that. Stereotypes and gender norms suck. I'm not gonna stop taking care of my well being because it might help me pass.

 

Then I shower shower and get dressed. I slip my binder over my shoulders and somehow manage to get it on. I put on a button up. It's a dark, disaturated, blue with white stars or maybe their horses or something? I can't quite tell what the design is. I leave it unbuttoned with a plain black T-shirt underneath. And a pair of black ripped jeans. While my hair is still damp, I put the product in and style it. With a middle part so it kind of swoops back. It goes down to my ear. And since I'm feeling a little fancy today, I decided to wear my rings and my silver chain, to top it off. 

 

Once I'm finished in the bathroom, I head downstairs. I quickly search for something to eat and I spot a granola bar. I grab it, putting it in my mouth. I get my lunch I made last night from the fridge and put it in my bag. 

 

I put on my scuffed up shoes. I mean I could get a new pair, but I think they look cool once they're worn out. I sling on my bag over my shoulders and grab my keys, wallet and head for my car.

 

Once I Arrived At School 8:00am.

 

I parked my car and took a deep breath in. You got this dude. This is your fresh start, so nobody can find out. I'm just an average dude, going to an average school, doing average things. 

 

So hopefully no one will find out. I made myself a set of rules this year. 

 

First one no dating, not that I have many options since not a lot of people are cool with dating a trans guy. Not to mention, I'd have to come out to them. Well, I guess I don't have to. But I feel like it's the right thing to do. 

 

Dating's risky, and since I want to stay stealth, that's not an option, and I'm still traumatized from my last relationship. 

 

Second, don't let anyone get too close, to the point where they find out too much about me. But don't keep them too far away either, where they don't know anything. 

 

Third, don't stand out. 

 

I got out of my car and checked my hair in my side view mirror and fixed my clothes. I took one last deep breath and headed into school. 

 

My first class is history. So I asked some random student walking by for directions and I found my classroom shortly after. 

 

The teacher spots me and announces to the class. “Everyone, this is Carter, he's new to our class. Why don't you introduce yourself?” 

 

Oh God, this is gonna be awkward. But I can do this. “Hi, I'm Carter Bailey, my family moved for work. And I think that's about it.” Great, I blew it. That's all I could say about myself. But to be fair, I'm not trying to open up to people either. 

 

The teacher looks at me. “Is that all Carter?” 

 

Yes, sir. I say quickly, I'm just ready to go to my seat. I could die of embarrassment right now. 

 

“Carter you can go sit by Sydney, in the back. Sydney, can you please raise your hand?” It takes her a minute but she does, so I start heading to my seat. 

 

There's two seats right beside each other and one desk in front of them. Once I get to my seat, I pull out my chair. Look at her and say. “Hi, I'm Carter Bailey.” 

 

She chuckles and says. “Yeah, I know.” 

 

God, why did I say that just now? she must think I'm an idiot. But I can't help it. My mind's racing with how everything can go wrong and because of that, things are going wrong. 

 

I pull myself together and say. “Oh...right.” “Sorry.” 

 

“You're good.” “Sydney Knee.” She leans out her hand to shake mine. I don't hesitate to accept. “By the way, you don't need to worry, everyone in this class is either focused on what the teacher is saying or most likely just waiting for classes to be done.” 

 

“I mean, you might worry a little.” There's a pause, and I take this time to study her. 

 

She has brown wavy hair that comes down just past her shoulders. And her eyes are a rich brown. But they're still warm, like honey. She also has very faint freckles around her face. She is objectively pretty, which means, if I can see that others can too. 

 

It's not like I'm interested, I mean I just met the girl. All I'm saying is–which don't get me wrong. I know it sounds like I'm objectifying her. Which maybe I am, but not for those reasons. I'm sure she's great and all but, uh...she stands out. So that kind of contradicts the very thing I'm trying not to do. 

 

So I guess I'll just keep up casual conversation while we're in class and try not to get too close. 

 

Then I realized I have been staring for too long. I am brought out of my head when I see her expression. She looks embarrassed. Has she been staring as well? 

 

We both quickly turned back to the board and listened to Mr. Holland's speech about something, I'm not really sure. I spent the rest of class trying to piece together the parts I missed. Then I hear the bell ring. So I headed to my next class. 

 

 

Sydney's Pov 8:00am

______________

 

I just arrived at school. I'm currently sitting in Dylan's car. He drove me. I check the time on my phone. Class is about to start so I should get going. 

 

"I should head into school now babe." 

 

"Ah. Yeah I should too." 

 

I lean over the console to kiss him. Then I get my cheerleading outfit out of the back seat and head for history which is my first class of the day. 

 

Surprisingly I'm not the last one to arrive. I head over to my seat, placing my books on the table. 

 

When I hear the teacher start to announce something. 

 

"Everyone, this is Carter, he's new to our class. Why don't you introduce yourself?" 

 

"Hi, I'm Carter Bailey, my family moved for work... and, I think that's about it?" 

 

"Is that all Carter?" 

 

"Yes, sir." 

 

"Carter, you can go sit by Sydney. In the back. Sydney, can you please raise your hand?" 

 

Wait, Sydney…as in this Sydney? Well there are no other Sydneys in this class. At least none that I know of. I contemplated for a moment. 

 

Well maybe he is not so bad. All though I do like having this desk all to myself. I guess as long as he doesn't annoy me and does his work. It's not like my opinion on the matter will be taken into consideration anyway. 

 

Oh shit...I forgot to raise my hand. So I do now. He makes his way over here. 

 

"Hi, I'm Carter Bailey." I chuckle so you are just as nervous as I am. I guess it would be hard since this is his first day and all. 

 

He's probably worried about making a good impression. So I respond with. “Yeah, I know.” 

 

“Oh...right? Sorry.”

 

“All good.” I introduced myself as well to make things less awkward. "Sydney Knee" 

 

What can I say to ease his mind? "By the way, you don't need to worry. Everyone in this class is either focused on what the teacher's saying or...most likely just waiting until class is done." 

 

"I mean, you might worry a little." 

 

There's a pause, so I take this time to get a better look at him. He must have a baby face because he looks quite a bit younger than seventeen, maybe eighteen. He looks more like he's fifteen-ish, maybe sixteen but that might be pushing it a bit. 

 

Maybe he skipped a year or two, to be in senior year. Now I'm curious. Should I ask him later? Wait, maybe that's not something I should ask. What if he takes it the wrong way? 

 

Have I been staring for too long? And why is he staring back? I hope he isn't staring because he's, interested. 

 

Great, now I sound conceited. But I can't help it, I'm an overthinker, so I overthink. 

 

But what if he thinks I'm interested. I have a boyfriend, should I tell him that? I just need to calm down. He's probably just curious about his new deskmate. Just like I am. 

 

When we both realize we have been staring for too long. 

 

We turn back to the board and listen to Mr. Holland's speech. About something, I'm not too sure what. Since I clearly wasn't listening. I spent the rest of class trying to piece together what I missed. Then I hear the bell ring. So I head to my next class.

 

Chapter 2: Author's note old

I know you've been waiting for chapter three, but I think i'm going to go back in and redo chapter one, and chapter two, combine them with chapter three, and what I had planned to be chapter 4 and 5, and I'm just going to make all of them into chapter one. i think that makes more sense for the story. And I think my writing so far has been lacking a sense of direction and clarity. Honestly, I started writing this on a whim, but I actually want to put in the effort to make it good, or at least good enough for me, hopefully for you too. Don't worry. The main premise will still be the same. Just hopefully, it'll make a little bit more sense.