the devil of paradis

by orugatou

Summary:

Eren Yeager, the cruel Devil of Paradis, was destined to die at the age of nineteen. As someone who existed in the past, present, and future all at once, Eren was as good as a god himself. Against all odds, wielding absolute power for the sake of freedom... he found himself helplessly chained to the cursed fate of this world.

Until the day he opened his eyes, once more in the body of his younger self, in an unfamiliar place, with a different identity, in another life.

Chapter 1: the devil of paradis wanted to die

Notes:

Hello for anyone clicking on this piece. Heads up, this is basically a transmigration AU for RivaEre, which will mostly be set in a modern setting, with a couple of mentions of the original timeline.

I will update the tags as I write this piece (though hopefully nothing too extreme), so please heed it. Thank you.

Eren Yeager was destined to die at the age of nineteen.

Before Eren became known as the Devil of Paradis, he was but a boy from a family who lived in the borders of Shiganshina. His father was a renowned doctor, his reputation widely known for being skillful in medicine who had saved many families within the Walls, and his mother was a housewife who dedicated her life to bring warmth into their humble home.

Meanwhile, in every step Eren took, two echoing pairs of footsteps would follow along the miniscule chatter of their mundane lives, were Mikasa and Armin.

Bright emerald eyes were like jewels which decorated his round face, the corners of his lips would frequently pull up into a smile that were like the blooming flowers of spring, contagious as they were to withdraw a low chuckle even from the mild-tempered Mikasa. 

Smudges of food would stick to his chubby cheeks whenever he rambled about the Survey Corps that always ended with a light smack to the back of his head, coming from his mother—Carla—who would scold him to not humor such thoughts. And, likewise, he always followed the smack with a grumble under his breath, resigning himself to the lunch his mother made him. 

The little brat loved his mother's homemade stew and, indeed a child he was, immediately got distracted from his mother’s reprimands once the savory broth spread on his tongue.

Eren was just a boy from a family who lived in the borders of Shiganshina, a humble abode with a roof made from wood, signs of age apparent against the scorching summer heats and heaps of snow during winters. A boy with a simple favorite meal he always looked forward to every few days. A boy with two childhood friends that he would drag to play with everyday.

A child of merely ten years old with a dream like many others.

Eren Yeager didn’t have much, but he had everything he needed. However, it appeared that fate had deemed him too greedy for wanting a cozy roof atop his head, his doting parents, and childhood friends, who would indulge in his ramblings of the world outside the Walls. So no matter how hard he tried to hold tightly to them… in the end, he lost everything.

When he opened his eyes after his slumber, what greeted him weren’t the aging wooden beams on his ceilings. Instead, it was the damp and dark stone walls of a dungeon prison cell. Not that it was an unfamiliar view to him because, after all, he had been chained in this very prison cell a few years ago. If anything, he might as well cozy up and call this 6-feet square cell as his second home.

Just like the change of scenery, there were visible changes on the said boy as well. His emerald-jeweled eyes seemed to have lost its light, faint lines depicting years-long of stress embedded themselves on what used to be a carefree and boyish face, framed within the loose brunette locks of hair that had grown past his shoulders.

Aside from his own heavy breathings, the only sound within his confinement was the constant tick, tick, tick of water dripping from a crack in the ceiling against the rusting iron bars, rolling down to form a shallow pool on the stone floor. Lighting from the torchlights outside his cell provided a faint illumination, though from time to time the fire would crackle and sway the dim yellow light, giving off a chilling sense of isolation. The air was thick with moisture, carrying with it the stale scent of mold, rust, and... something else.

Eren craned his head up, propping himself by his forearm on the cot. A furrow deepened between his fine brows: So it really was the smell of a homemade stew.

A silhouette stood across his cell, posture straight and domineering although he appeared to be slouching against the stone wall behind him, arms crossed in front of his body. The darkness of the room didn’t help Eren to get a glimpse of the visitor’s face, though he didn’t really need to see that person’s face to land a guess. 

“Captain.”

The individual who stood fearlessly alone within a few feet across the Devil of Paradis was indeed the famed captain of Survey Corps, Levi Ackerman. 

Eren looked down at the bowl of steaming stew on the iron chair next to Levi with an impassive gaze. Surely he had made it obvious that he would turn back every single lunch and dinner served to him, along with the sharp lines of: “Wouldn’t sparing three spoonfuls of such a fine dinner to this devil a waste? You’ve locked me like a damn mutt within this prison cell for days, or even weeks, might as well feed me some leftover dog food, no?”

Mind you, such confinements weren’t completely humane. Damp, dark, and silent prison cells where even a glint of sunlight couldn’t pass through the smallest cracks weren’t made just for isolation. It was meant for erasure, where one would long lose the track of time and hope would decay along the putrid flesh.

Though Eren knew barking those words wouldn’t budge the man in front of him, so he only settled with a “What brought you here?”

A pointless question, Eren knew. After all, who knew anything and everything better than Eren himself? Who was the one standing for the past three hours across his cell without saying anything, or what Levi had come for, as well as the words that would spew out of that snappy mouth.

But Eren couldn’t help the small seed of hope that had taken root inside his heart, that perhaps… maybe, the future could still change even a little—

“Eat.”

Eren closed his eyes, breath shuddering despite his effort to calm his mind when the truth confronted him. It was as if fate was laughing at his face, fingers pointing as twisted smiles adorned its hideous face, mockery lacing the resounding voice of demons that had spawned within his mind: Look at this dumb dog, wishing he could twist the fate with such a helpless, scrawny body.

However, the Devil of Paradis was first and foremost a human, and the human heart was such a peculiar thing. So with the seed of hope refusing to be plucked out from his unwavering heart, Eren repeated once more, “What brought you here?”  

Levi lifted his gaze. “Are you stupid or are you deaf?”

Silence permeated the air once more, no one knew what the other was thinking. As for Eren, what engulfed his mind was just a blank paper. Helplessness invaded his soul, nibbling at the seed of hope that he had planted mutely before, as if a thread had snapped in an instant by a sharp pair of scissors.

Then came the sound of clack! when Levi had turned the lock open to the cell. He strutted inside without a second thought, carefully placing the tray filled with a bowl of stew, side dishes, and a glass of water on the small table beside the sink. From the corner of his eyes, Eren could see the steam coming out of the bowl, apparent that it was freshly made and even more luxurious than the everyday food he had rejected.

“Mikasa said this homemade stew recipe was from your mother,” Levi rasped. He turned around and leaned back against the small table, facing Eren who was sitting up on the bed, merely a few feet away. There was a slight note of sorrow within the latter’s deep voice, as he continued, “Have your shitty mind ever thought what your mother would think about this whole farce you are conjuring?”

At that time, Eren knew exactly what words would come out from Levi’s lips, though his intentions remained unknown. Wasn’t it obvious enough, though? That this old man had come just to scorn him, threw spiteful insults at his face to provoke him, as he always did? Eren already had his fill of being cussed by all over the earth, he didn’t need another round of earful from his captain.

His captain.

A slight cut had made it through his heart, dripping with fresh blood that started out slowly tick, tick, tick sliding down the veins within his body, in sync with the leaking water into his prison cell. One drop, two drops slowly turned into a pool of blood beneath the dampened cot of the prison, squeezing his beating heart out of the last speckle of red and turning his whole body freezing cold as if he were but a breathing corpse.

When Eren came back to his senses, his gaze was planted on the overturned bowl of homemade stew. Broth met the pool of iron-rusted water from the cracks of the stone walls, plump meat scattered all across the floor. The reverberating clang of metal tray against the floor echoed for quite awhile before Eren roared, “Who the hell do you think you are to speak of my mother! Haven’t you had your fill of using my titan powers for Paradis’s interest the whole time I served as your soldier? You dare call everything I did was a farce, then do you have any better idea of what to do to save this forsaken island?! Why don’t you tell me, Captain? You think you’re so much better than me, but aren’t you just a cold-blooded killer as I am?”

Anger was brimming through Eren’s red-rimmed eyes, fist tightly clenched around the latter’s white ascot, one figure towering against the other as tension filled the air. In such a close distance, Eren finally got a clear view of Levi’s face amidst the sputtering torchlight across the iron bars. 

That cold face betrayed nothing, remaining as impassive as ever, despite being held viciously under Eren’s intimidation. Dull grey eyes, that Eren had once confused to be the color of the blue sky, looked back at him with evident dark circles beneath them as his lips pursed into a straight line. Eventually his cold fingertips found Eren’s hand, and without much effort, he yanked away Eren’s grip on his collar.

Eren wondered if he had imagined it, but there seemed to be a hint of remorse within those grey eyes, before Levi lowered his lashes to look at the utensils that the young man had swept off the table. A soft sigh followed, then a resolute voice rang inside the cell, “You are too far gone, truly beyond saving.”

Only one sentence, not even half as vile as the curses of ‘mutt’s and ‘spawn of devil’s that entered his right ear and went out the other way, but it had struck Eren like a dagger.

In the darkness of the prison cell, Levi hadn’t once lifted up his eyes to gaze back at Eren again. Not through the entire time he smoothed out the creases on his ascot and uniform, locked the iron bar behind his back, and left with a bang of the main door.

The prison cell returned to its presumed silence.

Eren dragged his heavy legs back to the bed, resigning himself to the drowsiness that he had been fighting. Part of him longed to stay awake, merely for the sake to save his last thread of sanity intact, because every time he closed his eyes, memories of the past, as well as the pictures of the future, would rush through beneath his heavy lids. 

A frown embraced his fine features as he fought the mess in his head, feeling his brain and heart mushed up together, that he wanted to rip everything apart. He wondered if death would be a mercy if it would make this torment stop, and Eren wanted to see if an attempt would possibly change the course of fate.

Fate, what a whole load of bullshit. Eren thought about the figure that had just left his cell, clenching his fist as if he tried to keep the remaining warmth of the man in his palm, bringing it close to his nose to inhale the soft scent of laundry detergent, along with the slight hint of ammonia and… stew. 

Ah, Levi must’ve been cleaning the kitchen when Mikasa cooked him the stew and asked him to deliver it to Eren. 

Eren shifted himself on the bed, facing sideways so now he was looking at the food he had thrown away to the floor. A guilty conscience stabbed him, he wanted to pick up the scatters and eat them off the floor to show his repentance, but what good would it do to him? If anything, he had pulled such an extreme reaction to show Levi how detestable of a person Eren had become. Eren could only count on Levi to retell it to Mikasa: “That worthless brat threw away your stew, give up on him.”

With mayhem in his head and a splitting pain in his heart, Eren found himself powerless against the surge of past, present, and future that assaulted him in waking and slumber. How he had wished Levi would’ve stayed, even insults and curses from his captain would be better to distract him from the pictured wars inside his head.

How he wished Levi had stayed to reprimand him, instead of giving up on him, along with the resolute “You are too far gone, truly beyond saving.” that were as if the final say laid down by the judge. How he wished to scramble down and kneel beneath the latter, begging for forgiveness as if he was a savior that Eren had put on a pedestal, muttering repeatedly under his breath, “I didn’t have a choice. So… I had to do it… I’m sorry.” How he wished they wouldn’t have parted on such a terrible term.

Because Levi probably hadn’t known, but Eren knew for a fact that was the last time they would’ve met before the battle of heaven and earth, where they would fight each other to their deaths.

Notes:

Starting off rather strong with the onions, so I apologize. But I promise it will get better in the later chapters!

Now, now. Was Mikasa the one who cooked him the stew?! Will we ever find out?! Will Eren ever find out?!

Chapter 2: the devil of paradis didn’t… die?

Eren Yeager was destined to die at the age of nineteen.

As the notorious Devil of Paradis, he had known the fate of the world he lived in. In every breath he took, in every beat that drummed in his heart, in every passing seconds, images of the past, present, and future had existed all at once in his head. Whether in his wake or slumber, every memory from the Founder’s power would torment him endlessly, ruthlessly.

Many expected that someone who could, and would, trample the world beneath his feet as if kicking over an anthill and scattering the billions of ants in disarray, would have no shortcomings at all. 

But for strength to exist, there was a need for a weakness. 

To the Devil of Paradis, something as simple as a deep sleep without the presence of those overlapping nightmares was extremely hard to come by. If anything, Eren might as well have bid his farewell to those peaceful rests when he was the age of sixteen.

Eren yearned for the nights where his sleep was filled with the dream of freedom, though he would even embrace the dreamless nights willingly, because he knew at the end of those deep slumbers, what awaited him was a pot of homemade stew that his mother cooked for him. The bubbling noises of boiling soup, sweet scent of rich broth wafting in the air, waking him from his sleep like he was floating in a warm embrace. Then Mikasa’s voice would drift to his ears along with a light nudge to his arm, calling out to him, “Eren, wake up. The sun has risen.” 

“Five more minutes.”

Only when the words slipped past his lips did Eren find it odd. He could no longer see the past and future images in his head, as he always had been. Also, wasn’t he resting in the dungeon prison cell by himself? What the fuck was Mikasa doing here?

Thus, in an instant, Eren’s eyes flew open. He found himself staring at a clean, white, empty ceiling. Over his body was an overly thick quilt as he looked down at the simple, yet finely varnished wooden bed. This was neither his bed nor a cot in the prison cell, that was for sure.

Eren froze. He carefully scanned his surroundings once more: there was a cupboard at the corner of the room, shelves of books and toys alike, and a big desk with a black-screen that had wires all around next to them. However, in the end, he still couldn’t figure out where he was. 

Had he committed such a grave crime against humanity and was killed off before he even brought out the battle of heaven and earth? Was his fate too vile and hideous that his life was abruptly cut short before he could deliver his final blow to the earth? 

Did he finally die and wake up in the afterlife? Was he even deserving of an afterlife after all the crimes he had done? But then, what was someone as pure and kind-hearted as Mikasa doing here?

That’s right. “Mikasa?”

“I’m here,” her soft voice rang beside him. Eren didn’t know how to face this childhood friend who had once been as close as family, yet once he also had pushed away and grew estranged. Seeing Eren wavered, Mikasa’s brows furrowed slightly, so she stretched her palm against his forehead. “Your fever has gone down from last night, are you still uncomfortable anywhere?”

The sudden touch against his skin took Eren by surprise. He had wanted to pull away, not used to the sudden intimacy he had once cut off in the form of sharp words and cold glances to her, recalling his last hurtful words for her in his memories... but another part of him couldn’t bear to part from that single touch.

He had longed to have the people he cherished come to him, ask him how he was doing, whether the tragic fate of the world had hurted him as much as it hurted them.

“Mikasa.”

Mikasa blinked at him, confusion apparent on her youthful face. When Eren looked at her, her eyes were notably brilliant, devoid from lines of stress, and her hair had grown a bit longer. “You called me already, what is it?”

“What day is it?”

“Tuesday.”

“Tuesday?” When the word left his tongue, the gears in his head started to work. “What about the date?”

“The twenty-first of June.”

Eren cleared his throat. “And the year…?”

“Did the fever render you stupid or have you gone completely amnesiac?” Ouch, that sharp tongue of hers… surely carved from the same damn family tree as his captain, alright. Mikasa got up from where she sat at the edge of the bed, heaving a sigh. “Twenty, twenty-two. Wanna get that head checked by the doctor, don’t you?”

What the hell.

What the hell.

When did the year suddenly go past the eight-hundreds?

“If you’re already feeling better, get down already. Your mom cooked your favorite stew.”

His eye twitched. “My mom?”

Eren gulped at the thought. This time, it wasn’t that Eren had 'forgotten' his mother. Instead, he remembered with clarity how his mother's life in his memories had been cruelly taken by his own hands, and Eren could feel his heart go cold.

Were he to see his mother? How was he supposed to face her?

Regardless, his thoughts remained shackled to himself, leaving Mikasa gaping at him in disbelief. Though she no longer had the strength to humor Eren’s peculiarity so she swatted a “Stop playing around and get down,” before slamming the door behind her back.

There was no one else in the room. After a moment's hesitation, a hard slap landed to his own cheek, earning himself a yelp of pain. By then, Eren figured this wasn’t the afterlife nor was it a dream. 

Then... was this another world?

The thought made his hairs stood on end, shivers running down his spine. His whole life confined living within the Walls, he had always ventured to wonder what life was like outside. And once he earned the Founding Titan’s abilities, none of the life inside nor outside the Walls could faze him. 

Eren was as good as a god himself. 

Yet somehow, this day, he awoke in an entirely different body, different house, different world. To think that even after having earned the most destructive and powerful force as the Devil of Paradis, there were still mysteries to life he had yet to uncover.

It scared him, and excited him altogether.

To confirm his suspicions, he made his way in front of the full-body mirror next to the door. Last time he saw his reflection within the sink mirror in his cell, his hair had grown past his shoulders so he tied them into a bun to keep it practical. His height had sprouted due to puberty, towering to around 180 centimeters, and his build was fairly broad. 

However, the face reflected across the mirror in front of him now was youthful. His once jaded green eyes seemed to earn its vitality back to the beautiful pair of emerald gems, while his hair had grown slightly longer past his ears, but not long enough to reach his shoulders. His stature was shorter than he last remembered, and his well-toned muscles had significantly receded overnight. This was the appearance he had once assumed at the age of sixteen.

Thus, with a soft what the fuck muttered under his breath, Eren had to accept the fact that his infamous title as the Devil of Paradis was as good as a bygone past. Those years he had endured the torment of the Titan powers, scheming against and for his people, the constant flashing images of past, present, and future that existed at the same time in his head… all vanished with a snap of a finger, with one good night sleep. 

How the hell did this even happen?

Eren didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Nor did he know how to react by the time he turned the knob open and made his way down the stairs, where his eyes caught sight of a familiar figure busying around the kitchen, a scent of homemade stew drifted through the air. 

The back of that figure was facing him, and the sunlight streaming through the window backlighted the silhouette, making Eren unable to get a clear view of the person standing there. But Eren could recognize that figure anywhere. He had seen it way too many times in his sleepless nights and within his nightmares, stolen glimpses of the past amidst the torture that seemed to make life a little bit bearable to him.

Eren started, his voice cracking, “Mom…”

The figure hummed before finally turning around to hold Eren in her steady gaze. “Eren,” her voice was as gentle as he remembered. “Intending to sleep in again, aren’t you? If you’re already feeling healthy, you have to go to school.”

Eren shuffled about for a bit before settling down to sit on the wide dining table with his head lowered. Next to his left was his dad, and to his right was Mikasa. He suddenly found himself nestled in an all-too-familiar breakfast setting that seemed to blur the lines between the dream and reality.

If... this was merely a dream, then Eren truly didn't want to wake up.

Mikasa ladled four bowls of homemade stew, a thin layer of haze coming up from the steaming soup while plump and tender meat floated about the rich broth. Eren kept quiet the entire time he scooped up four plates of rice before serving them to each on the table.

“Eren, are you still feeling unwell?” 

The voice had come too sudden, too close. It caught Eren entirely off-guard as he flinched upon the presence behind him. At last, he braced himself and lifted his eyes to catch a clear look at his mother. 

Her skin glowed against the seeping sunlight through the kitchen window, large hazel eyes that flowed with warmth, while her long dark hair was tied into a small bun. Her bangs was dampened with sweat, loose strands clung to her forehead, and it took all of Eren’s might to hold back from wanting to wipe her sweat with his sleeves. It took all of his might to hold back from getting down to his knees and kissing the floor his mother stood upon, muttering a constant “I’m sorry... Mom, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” 

As if his sorry could ever bring back his mother’s soul whom he had squished with his own very finger, trampled across his endless marching in the name of ‘freedom’. 

But at this moment, his mother was alive and well, cladded in her cream-colored sweater with intact stitches instead of patched with leftover fabrics she asked from their neighborhood tailor, no more the poor-stricken housewife from the borders of Shiganshina. Guilt ate at Eren’s heart, but a sigh of relief escaped his lips. When he saw her mother living a good life that he had longed to give in the past, Eren wanted to curl up into a ball and return to the warmth of his mother’s embrace.

Eren’s lashes quivered, his eyes glistened slightly, but he managed to say, “Mn. I still feel a little sick,” which wouldn’t be a complete lie. His heart was sick, after all.

Carla, who had no way of knowing his unstable waves of emotions nor the fact that her own son had been replaced by an otherworldly—literally—soul, chuckled as she pulled on his ear. “Lying again. You do know your ears turn red when you make up a lie, right?”

Eren tightened his hold on his own spoon, the poor utensil might even snap from how much force he was using, but it was still an attempt to hold his tears back, as futile as it might appear. 

In the past, he would’ve raised his gooseflesh to no end, hissing and baring his fangs in defense like a threatened angry cat, bickering endlessly against his mother's reminders. But the tug on his ear that once felt like a jab to his dignity, now felt like a gentle caress of spring wind, filled with tender reprimands that only wanted him to behave well. 

He hummed softly, “Alright. I’ll go to school.”

Notes:

This story will take longer than I intended to, eh. I'll try to update every 1-2 days.

Chapter 3: the devil of paradis's friends

The summer sun was scorching hot against the tree-lined pathway. Beneath its relentless assault of heat was three youngsters clothed in similar uniforms. 

On the foremost left was the shortest of the three with the most boyish face. His blond hair was slightly past his shoulders, tied into a low single braid while bangs fell over his defined eyebrows. Behind his glasses lay the pair of sky-like jewels that was as azure as they were dazzling under the sunlight. This was Armin Arlert, one who used to be the 15th Commander of the Survey Corps, and now bore the title of a student council president.

While on the foremost right was the only girl amongst the group, fairly tall and toned with a slender figure. Her skin was pale, contrasting her chin-length ebony hair. Loose locks of hair fell around her sharp face, while the rest was pulled into a high ponytail. Her grey eyes had a glimmering shine, that sometimes she shut closed when stray strands of bangs would prick into her eyes. Though unlike the once top-ranked soldier of the Survey Corps, Mikasa Ackerman of today didn't have the scar below her right eyes.

Tucked in the middle was a boy with emerald-tinted eyes, his sun-kissed skin the color of honey, and his stature was fit. With heat relentlessly assaulting his every step, a sheen of sweat beaded on his forehead and drenched his uniform entirely. He had found his medium hairstyle to be impractical, but hadn’t had the time to get it cut this morning, so he settled with his mother’s pink hairpins. Thus, the young man’s beautiful face, that seemed to be the exact copy of his mother’s, was neatly framed by brunette curtain bangs, pinned up by star-shaped hair clips.

This, of course, was none other than the once-feared Devil of Paradis who possessed the powers of three Titans, practically a walking god among the mortals, who once was fated to tread his path over eighty-percent of humanity scattered across the earth. 

This was Eren Yeager, the very Devil of Paradis, who was once destined to die at the young age of nineteen.

But the facial features and build he had was the print image of when he was sixteen. He still had three more years until the prophecy of his past life would follow through, and Eren couldn’t help but wonder if that destiny would apply to life in this world as well. 

A glimmer of hope took root into the soil of his heart. After all, his parents were still alive, that was enough reason for him to wish that things would be different this time around. Regardless, he was given the chance to start anew, way back to the age where things hadn’t gone too wrong in the past. He could make no mistake.

“Armin, you wanna visit the newly-opened cafe across the school? I heard they sell very tasty cheesecake and puddings.”

Armin shook his head with a frown. “I have a meeting with the council, so you can go on ahead, Mikasa. I’ll see if I can catch up to you later.”

Eren raised a hand, smiling, “Then I’ll come.”

“What are you saying?” Armin nudged the latter’s arm, his tone teasing with a sneer. “You’re still in detention for not doing the biology homework last week.”

“Was there such a thing?”

Before Armin could answer, a snicker came from his right side. “Eren had turned stupid from his fever, bear with it.”

Thus, Armin didn’t lose a beat when he came back with a “Hadn’t he always been stupid, though?”

What the hell. “What the hell?”

“Who in their right mind would skip doing that teacher's biology homework if not for a complete idiot? You should know better than anyone, Eren.”

Eren, though, wasn’t too worried despite his friends’ rebukes. Of course, he wasn’t the brightest soldier—or student, in that case—but he was confident enough in his knowledge. He was within the top ten of the 104th cadets, and was once the epitome of god and devil in a mortal body, after all. What was the meaning of a miniscule punishment for not working a biology homework?

Thus, grinning dauntlessly as he shrugged his shoulders, Eren hummed a tune without much thought, earning himself incredulous looks from his left and right sides. 

A smack landed at the back of his head. “What are you grinning and skipping about? Aren’t you afraid that he will beat you to death? You are running later than you should’ve, too.”

“Beat me to death? Armin, aren’t you exaggerating too much?”

Armin’s eyebrows curved even higher in disbelief, as if they were trying to completely disappear beneath his layer of bangs, he meted out, “Your fever really made you lose your mind, didn't it?”

Seeing the layer of worry within those clear blue eyes, Eren’s smile froze over. It was as if an ill omen had befell him as he started to take this warning rather seriously. 

In the past life, there had only been one person who dare and would beat him half to death, but Eren had shrugged it off. Eren wasn’t a soldier, and life in this world was fairly peaceful… what would be the occasion for Eren to meet him again, in this entirely different world? So Eren Yeager, deeming himself extremely bright and clever, had shrugged off the idea, thinking: I probably would never meet that person.

“Just because your dad is a doctor who liked to help him with stuff in the infirmary, you surely don’t forget he's also the only person who wouldn’t spoil and let you free from your detentions, right?”

Eren felt unease nibbling at his heart while his head started to run about with guesses. He pulled the corners of his lips stiffly, a forced smile gracing his features. “My great student council president, I came down with a high fever yesterday. Surely this biology teacher of mine wouldn’t beat this poor, sickly student ruthlessly?”

If that person… truly was in this world, and his biology teacher, at that… Eren shook his head. So hard that he felt like he could snap his neck from the sheer strength. Eren tried to reason with Armin, asked Mikasa to help him out with excuses, and begged for mercy of his newly acquired life. 

He had wanted to start anew, so how was he about to lose his chance at turning a new leaf by facing that man on his first day? 

“What are you shaking your head off like a wet dog for? Get your ass over here right now.”

A man stood in front of the school gate, cladded in a white button-up collared shirt, exquisite fabric remained smoothed out despite the man’s slouching against the gates. He was slender in form, but the biceps from his crossed arms betrayed the toned muscles visible through the fine cloth. His stature wasn’t tall… but a domineering aura graced that handsome face, nonetheless. His grey eyes—which if Eren didn’t know any better, would’ve thought them the color of the blue sky—glinting with menace along the sword-like brows and a narrow, sharp nose.

The man was exceptionally good-looking. However, one glance was enough to conclude that you wouldn't want to cause him trouble, what with his unapproachable look.

Eren didn’t know how long he had been burnt under the summer heat in silence, having stopped in his tracks as pats of good luck! were muttered from the friends by his sides, who immediately scampered away when that deep voice ‘greeted’ them by the school gates. 

When Eren watched that unmoving man from a distance, there was a mix of emotions that swelled inside his heart. 

Fear was an obvious big part of it, but another part of him found it rather riveting.

Having resigned to the unchangeable fate of the past, Eren had accepted that their grave partings in the dungeon prison cell would’ve been the last time they met each other, greeted each other, talked to each other.

Who would’ve known, indeed. 

Upon this realization, Eren remembered that man’s words from that time, calling Eren’s schemes and plans a whole load of farce. A bitter taste when he first heard it, but standing across from each other now, in foreign circumstances, with different identities, in another life… his past truly was a bull of farce.

Across him was the man who, not once but twice, beat him up into a pulp in remonstrations. One who strolled into the same prison cell as the Devil of Paradis without a sliver of fear, just to send the devil a bowl of freshly homemade stew while hurling insults at him. One who took everything from Eren, and lost everything to Eren.

The renowned squad captain of the Special Operations Squad within the Survey Corps, clamored as Humanity's Strongest Soldier, who had once washed Marleyans with dread from his sheer strength. 

His Captain. Levi Ackerman.

And so, the man straightened his back, scowl seemed unwilling to part from his finely carved face as scorn filled those grey eyes. “Eren."

Eren swallowed nervously.

"Come to the laboratory before the first period,” said the man, turning his back to Eren without so much as a glance over his shoulder.

Notes:

He he he. Finally they reunited. I wanted to update last night, but I accidentally fell asleep while editing lol

Chapter 4: the devil of paradis’s captain

With a resounding bang, Levi slapped a stack of books on the long laboratory table. Had he used any more strength, the table might as well snap into two under the pressure, more so from the man's overbearing presence rather than the pile of homework submitted to him.

“Sort this out by three this noon,” he said expressionlessly, feigning oblivion to the wide-eyed boy gaping at him across the table. “And study the materials within, I’ll have you make a resume that you have to submit by seven tomorrow morning to make up for your late turn-in last week.”

“Wasn't the one-week detention already enough for a punishment?”

A glint of menace in those dark orbs. “I beg your pardon?”

Oh, I'll make you beg for real, was what Eren wanted to snap back at him. But he had to be really asking for a beating to death if that was the case, so he finally answered through gritted teeth, “I'll even hand it out by six, sir.”

Levi's lashes wavered in the cold lab room, a look of interest flashed in his eyes when he looked up at Eren, but it disappeared as soon as a scornful smirk tucked at his lips. “Suit yourself.”

Thus, Eren really couldn't blame anyone but himself that he had to decline Mikasa's offer to the cafe when she visited him during their break.

Mikasa sympathetically watched him sort out the piling books as she nibbled on the sausage within the lunchbox Carla had packed for her. Her gaze caught sight of how Eren hadn't touched his own box the entire break. So she sighed, “Eat your lunch, at least. What if you get sick again?”

“I'll eat it later.” Eren busied about as he grabbed a couple more books from the pile, read the names over the covers: Jean Kirstein, Sasha Braus, Connie Springer. So almost everyone he had known in the past had really reborned. A thought occurred to him, he asked, “Ah. Where is Armin?”

“You know, student council stuff,” she waved her hand around, apparently used to the absence of the busy president from their casual hangouts, so Eren didn't push it. He resumed his sorting job when a spoonful of rice drew close to his lips, lifting his gaze back to look at Mikasa, who sighed helplessly, “You wouldn't let me help sort it out, at least have a couple of bites.”

Hesitation filled Eren's heart. What if someone were to see her feed him, wouldn't such an intimate gesture make a rumor that'd spread like a wildifre? 

“I promised your mom that I would keep you from being sick again.”

Under Mikasa’s genuine worry, Eren felt warmth engulfing his heart. So he swallowed down his dignity and opened an ah as she fed him spoonful by spoonful. The sausage had long gone cold from being ignored in the chilling room, but Eren wolfed down the lunch with Mikasa's help regardless. By the time he ate the last bite, he finished sorting the last book from the pile. 

“What about the resume?”

“I can finish it by this evening if I skip PE.” Eren grinned widely, trying to assure the sympathetic Mikasa so she'd worry less, composure lacing his soft tone when he added, “Also, even if you intend to help out, he might recognize your handwriting. It's best if I do it myself.”

Mikasa, finally giving up, smoothed out the lines on her forehead with a mild look. “Alright, I'll tell the teacher that you still feel too sick to join PE. Rest up after you finish the resume, alright?”

“Yes, yes, Miss Ackerman. Go to your class already, the break is over in a few minutes.”

“I'll see you later. Let's walk home together.”

At last, Eren stayed behind in the lab. He had lived most of his life in the rundown village of Shiganshina, then in the darkness of the soldier quarters. A laboratory filled with questionable organs kept within jars of liquid or a neat line of skeletons that seemed too lifelike within the glass board couldn't faze him. 

This Devil of Paradis was once an entity that roamed the earth and treaded the mortals with a squish of his pinky, what's a mere ghost would do to him—

“How sickening.” 

Eren dropped the pile of books he wanted to move to the cabinet, face deathly pale as his hands trembled. Whipping his head around to find the very person who had brought him shock, that man remained sitting casually near a made-up pantry corner while he sipped leisurely on his cup of hot tea. Thus, with his work scattered all across the floor, Eren could only pin him with an accusing glare. 

“What are you glaring at me for, I've been here the whole time.”

“Then you should've made a sound.”

“This entire lab is my assigned workplace. If anything, you're the one intruding.”

Eren let out an exasperated sigh, bending down to gather the books from the floor, as he muttered, “Yes, alright, sir. It's my fault. There are no empty rooms for me to sort these out anyway.”

A pause, then came that venomous voice which seemed to crack a bit. “You can sort them in the janitor room.”

Was he being serious, Eren asked inwardly as he got back up. But there really was no point in arguing with this haughty man, especially when his face betrayed nothing at all, not even a hint of a joke. In this life or that one, this man truly remained the same. 

Unfortunately, in this life or that one, Eren's feelings also remained the same. 

More than the shock he got from the sudden disruption, Eren was more concerned with his previous comment: I've been here the whole time.

He had been here the whole time? Did that mean… 

Levi put down his tea by the pantry sink. Strolling over to Eren, he tossed a plastic bag on the table, his expression remained as sour as his words, “Your girlfriend told me to give these to you.”

“Mikasa is not my girlfriend.”

Levi's gaze flickered for a bit before he finally settled with a disdainful gaze. “That's none of my fucking business. For all I know, she had been feeding you lunch like you're a fucking baby. It's fucking nauseating, go get a room next time.”

So he really had been here the whole time.

Before Eren could defend himself, and to save Mikasa’s honorable reputation, the man had turned on his heels. Therefore, once he had his fill of insulting and throwing scornful gazes at the helpless youth, Levi left the lab. 

Quickly stacking the books and setting them in the cabinet, Eren found the plastic bag a curious thing. So Eren mutely fished item after random item out of the bag.

What the hell was all this? Was Mikasa robbing the school canteen or something? Three bottles of fresh strawberry milk. Okay, he plucked a straw to one of them. Two korokkes. Eren bit into the crunchy croquette, humming silently when the taste of mashed potatoes melted on his tongue. A fever medicine…

Why didn't Mikasa give them herself when she visited him during the break? 

Thinking it again, Eren found it even more uncanny. Mikasa had been with him in the lab during the entire break, when had she gotten the time to ransack the canteen? She returned to the class within the last five minutes, while the canteen was located in another building, which would take ten minutes of walking to and fro. 

Was Levi actually the one who… 

A punch to his face snapped Eren from his wild fantasies, a fist-shaped redness left in its wake, as he tried to calm his breaths from the sting of his own strength.

No, that couldn't be. If Levi said that it's from Mikasa, then it's from Mikasa. Eren shouldn't let his imaginations ran wild, not when it's obviously for indulging his own selfish desires.

In his entire life, Eren had exercised his mindset to respect his captain, obey his captain, honor his captain. Even in his worst moments, he never really broke the oath he took like they were chantings that had paved his way of life. The Devil of Paradis wanted nothing better but to give a well-deserved life for his captain and his friends.

Although it obviously was easier said than done.

Eren recalled the first time he had met that man. The name Levi Ackerman was famed throughout the three Walls. He was extremely good looking, and a skilled soldier to boot. His posture as straight as a wooden board whenever he marched through the crowds on a high horse, and his widely-known composure was impeccably exceptional amidst life-threatening situations. Eren had always been watching him even before he joined the military, climbing the unused boxes by the streets with his short legs, tiptoeing and straining his neck to catch a glimpse of his captain.

Levi had to be his captain, was chanted in his mind day and night, not giving a care of whether the said man would ever accept him under his wings of freedom anyway.

Despite his three-Walls-thick-widely-known bad temper, Levi’s fame never died down. After the show of beating Eren to a pulp in the trial before accepting him to the Survey Corps, Eren found that the cadets who swoon over his good looks only increased. 

This caused a dull ache in Eren’s heart, he despised the snickers of girls standing in the line behind him when they caught a glimpse of that man, despised how Levi’s squad members would casually touch and slung their arms around their captain.

That was Eren’s captain, he wanted to shout. 

At times, he’d find himself glaring at the said man accusingly, thinking: Weren’t you supposed to be ill-tempered? How could you let them gossip about you and touch you as they wish? Shove them the fuck away!

Eren didn’t care whether it was his fellow cadets or his very own superiors, his dagger-like glare would undoubtedly land on anyone who even dared to come close within an arm's length to his captain. Levi belonged to him, he had set his eyes on his captain first since many, many years ago. 

Who dared to come into the peripherals of his captain’s eyes should get their chest stabbed over a hundred times! Who dared to lay even a single glance on those ethereal grey eyes should have their eyeballs gouged out! Who dared to touch even a fringe of his captain’s garment should get their limbs chopped up!

So, with the course of time, Eren managed to figure out that what he had been feeling was jealousy. A borderline possessiveness, even. Maybe he really should’ve gotten himself checked to a doctor of whether his obsession was even humane. 

However, he later found out that he was partly an intelligent titan, so he soothed himself: This was just a beastly nature of the titan in his blood. Eren did nothing wrong for thinking such notorious and possessive thoughts, not as long as he didn’t act on it.

But, of course, it was just a bunch of empty words. 

The fire of his obsession only burned fiercer with every passing moment he spent within Levi’s company and reached its peak when he first got his wet arousal at the fresh age of fifteen.

The hour was late when he knocked the door to Levi’s office with a pot of hot tea that Levi had requested after their training that day. But after three sequences of knocks were left ignored, Eren braced himself to turn the knob open. What greeted his sight was that his captain sprawled across his desk with a mess of paperworks beneath the arms that propped his cheeks. 

When he was in a deep slumber, Levi’s unfriendly expression completely drained from his face. 

The creases of scowl on his forehead smoothed out, his lips parted slightly in a steady breathing, and his inky black hair jutted out messily. Levi had hung his uniform along the ascot away on a clothes hanger, retiring himself in a comfortable attire of grey sweater and loose dark pants. 

When Eren saw how peaceful Levi slept, warmth rose in his chest and Eren had to hold himself back from wanting to move the man to his empty bed, to cover him with the quilt and keep him company through the night.

A groan slipped past those thin lips along a slight frown on his face, seemingly a nightmare had invaded his sleep, as Levi shuffled about before settling back into his presumed sleeping position.

It was obviously a natural thing to stir in one’s sleep, no one would think much about it.

Not Eren, though.

Heat crept up his neck to his ears, a flush of red tinted his cheeks that luckily was a bit obscured by his tanned complexion. Eren suddenly felt that the pot was burning too hot in his hold. He quickly settled the tea on another small table in the room before he could make a fool of himself by accidentally dropping it and waking the man up from his rest. 

Any person in their right mind would definitely leave the room under this situation.

And, again—not Eren, though.

Eren watched the sleeping man in front of him, chest heaving up and down in a steady interval, grey eyes closed beneath those heavy lids that met the dark circles underneath. His gaze traced down from those eyes, to that straight nose, and finally stopping at those parted lips. 

A flame of desire pooled at his stomach, burning away the last thread of logic in his head, wanting to bend down to capture those lips between his own. 

Upon this wild thought, he bit down to his own lips, hard enough to draw blood. An insatiable hunger rose in his hazy gaze, a violent shudder ran down his spine. His breaths turned heavier when his eyes trailed further down to that slender neck, tucked in those muscular arms, like Levi was a prey trying to hide its vital points from the predator.

Levi really should’ve tried harder had he wanted to save his skin from the predator that was his own subordinate, his own squad member, his own Eren.

Because all that was on that young man's head was how he imagined that fair neck would look pretty had he decorated it with stark purple love bites, or maybe add some debauched scratches of his nails as well as red streaks of helpless slaps of a weak palm against that fair skin, while Eren would let his body turn pliant under Levi’s continuous assaults. 

How he imagined Levi’s voice turned husky along his labored breathing. His calloused hands grabbed Eren’s chin harshly to take a long look at that pretty face, beads of tears slipping past those fluttering lashes as his emerald jewels glistened pitifully. 

And, oh, how much would Levi love to see Eren cry and be ruined underneath him—loved it too much —that he thought his mind would break from how beautiful the boy looked within his mercy. 

Levi resentfully bared his fangs into Eren’s earlobe.

This bite was too hard on a flesh that was way too tender. Eren was still a growing boy, after all. A loud moan was ripped out from his throat, scrambling to circle his sun-kissed arms around that fair neck. Embarrassment burned him thoroughly at his own shameless voice, digging his nails deeper into the hard muscles of the latter’s shoulder in annoyance.

“Fuck!” Levi’s breath shuddered against Eren’s ears, causing gooseflesh to rise on the boy’s body, and in turn, his nipples perked up as if begging to get his captain’s attention. 

Levi, as dependable and reliable as ever, would of course welcome such a desperate request. 

Warm lips finding its perch on one of the perky nipples, wet and utterly humiliating for the one who was in the receiving end, though the fire of arousal had rendered Eren’s judgement bar to the lowest of hell. 

How the fuck was Eren supposed to care about being shameless at this point? 

Consumed by desire, Levi pulled away with a pained expression. His hands reaching down to loosen the belt of his pants, his voice grunted heavily, “Had I known you were such a shameless little slut, I should’ve fucked you during that trial. Wouldn’t you love that? This filthy body bound with ropes and handcuffed to the metal pole, rendering you completely powerless and pliant, as I drive my cock into you hard, right in front of everybody watching.”

Eren tried to grip into the table, or anything at all, to keep himself steady. But to no avail. 

“Wouldn’t that thoroughly convince those old farts lazying about in the Military Police? How, despite having an abominable titan ability, you are actually just a filthy fucking pervert who loved nothing more than to be a cum dump for everybody present that day?”

“Captain…”

“Hah.” A mocking laugh ripped through the air, those thin lips twisted into a sneer, as he rasped, “Calling me captain, captain day and night as if it doesn’t fucking turn you on.”

Didn't he hit the nail right on the head.

“If you’re so desperate to make a debauchery of your shitty self, then why don’t you drop to your knees like a good boy and put that pretty little mouth to work?” Levi ran a cold thumb over Eren’s lower lip, and where he tugged at the end, a sting sent shivers down the young boy's body. Eren flinched, realizing his lips had cracked from the harsh bites and kisses from before. Satisfied with his masterwork, Levi’s gaze was clouded with lust when he added, “Suck me off, no teeth . If you do well, then maybe I’ll consider fucking your brain dumb.”

Eren Yeager—the sinister Devil of Paradis—was truly defeated.

A metallic taste dripped into his mouth, pricking him away from the fantasies he just had, blood seeped from his actually cracked lower lip. 

Though Eren was far too turned on to give a fuck about the pain from his lips, he was too far gone. 

He only wanted to get down on his knees and shuffled about beneath his captain’s desk, putting his mouth to work on his captain's length, all to rip another “good boy” in between Levi’s moans and grunts.

Then he blinked. Once, twice.

What the hell was he thinking?

What the actual hell was he thinking?

Eren froze in place as he eyed his captain, still soundly sleeping on his desk with a worn down face. Then he looked down in incredulity, his hard on straining in his dark pants. Had he worn his uniform's white pair, the wetness leaking from his tip might even seep visibly through the cloth. 

What is he, a fucking animal in heat?! What the hell?!

Eren pursed his bleeding lips and made a one hundred eighty degrees turn, strutting his way to the door while he tugged at his sweater downward, a futile attempt to hide away the shameless arousal he had gotten from imagining getting down for his captain.

Another wave of shame slammed into his conscience, and having been caught off guard, Eren accidentally bumped into a wooden shelf of paperworks. He didn’t even dare to delay a second longer, and not sparing even a glance to check whether Levi was still asleep, he scrambled to the door and ran away. 

It was really too bad Eren hadn’t bothered to take even a glimpse over his shoulder. Had he only done so, he would’ve caught sight of the wide-awake Levi on his desk, with his expression unreadable and stiff, though a tinge of red flushed his ears. It truly was too bad Eren would never know of this fact, even after his rebirth.

When Eren pulled himself back from the recollection, he immediately looked down with a heave of sigh. How absolutely outrageous that even his present self still had the burning arousal at the thought of his captain—no, his biology teacher now. 

Eren initially thought that emphasizing that the man had become his biology teacher now would help distract his corrupted imaginations, but when his eyes landed on the large and vacant laboratorium, Levi’s voice rang in his ears: This entire lab is my assigned workplace.

Eren swallowed hard.

Filthy images of him being bent over the long table, or being lifted against the wooden cabinet, or having some teaching materials shoved—

Another punch landed on his other cheek and Eren wanted to cry from how hard he had smacked himself this time, having spared not the slightest mercy when his knuckles met the soft flesh of his cheek. He was sure his face would be black and blue by tomorrow morning, so how was he supposed to explain it to his mother?

Ah, yes! I punched myself twice for daydreaming that I was sucking off my captain who is now my biology teacher… Well, Eren thought he might as well dig himself a fine soil in his backyard and bury himself alive while he was still able to do so.

Eren went to the bathroom to get rid of his arousal as soon as possible, fearing the owner of this workspace, as well as the object of his desire, would come and catch him in an unseemly sight.

That night in the past when he first got a hard on and helplessly rubbed himself to the thought of his superior, Eren had resolutely promised himself that he would never think of such fantasies about his captain ever again. He should respect his captain, obey his captain, honor his captain—all should be carried out without fail!

And, every time, Eren failed.

Notes:

A very, very long chapter, wasn’t it? I had a fun time writing this one, though. Apparently, I made RivaEre's (not really) sex at chapter-fucking-FOUR because I just wanted to see them fuck already...

But, yeah, don't we love a possessive little Eren? Of course, Levi would get his fill of POV, and he is no better, if not inherently worse, than Eren~ But that's a tale for another time.

Chapter 5: the devil of paradis stole a coat

A yawn ripped through the silent school hallways. Half-awake and bleary-eyed, Eren pulled his cardigan closer to his body, warding off the morning wind as he dragged his sluggish feet to the lab.

The sun had only peeked a bit from the east, but Eren was a gentleman who stayed true to his words, so he had kicked off his quilt early in the morning and set out before the clock struck six.

“Hello, sir.” Eren greeted, gaze landed upon the unapproachable figure sitting at the teacher desk in front of the lab, trying his very best to swallow back a yawn that almost slipped out.

The clock's minute hand was only ten minutes away from striking exactly six in the morning.

“Here is my resume, sir.”

Levi, on the other hand, seemed perfectly refreshed and already busying about as his pen ceaselessly scribbled on the paperworks. He nodded his chin to the edge of his table without lifting his eyes. “Just put it there, I’ll check it after this.”

The young boy felt like he could drop dead right now, wanting to give in to his heavy-lidded eyes that were screaming at him to let them rest. 

Hmph, as if. 

Eren had wanted to test the water with the Levi of this world, and alone time with this man would be extremely hard to come by, no? So in the end, he found himself shuffling closer to Levi’s desk, craning his neck to take a peek at the papers scattered about. “Are you scoring the last exams?”

“Don’t you have eyes to see?”

Sheesh, this old geezer. With how his mouth was as snappy as always, Eren wanted to shut it up with his own. But of course, Eren could only smile through it with gritted teeth. “Can I help you with anything, sir?”

“What, so you can give a perfect score on your own paper?”

“Pfft. As if I could do such a thing under your supervision,” Eren snickered, dragging a wooden chair and setting it across from Levi, he plopped down resolutely. “Let me help sorting them out, at least. Your eye bags have gotten a lot worse.” 

Levi’s gaze might as well become the sharp fangs of a venomous snake that would pounce the boy in front of him at any second, but Eren was oblivious to the killing intent behind his glare. 

Eren's hands nimbly took a couple of exam papers that were already scored and started to sort them by the classes. This was a casual side work during the time he served in the military, always volunteering to help with the paperworks after Levi stamped his cleaning job as ‘unworthy of praise’.

Without himself realizing, he hummed a tune under his breaths, quite content with how nostalgic such a simple task felt to him. But a sharp tongue cut through the peaceful atmosphere with a “Shut your mouth.”

“I am shutting my mouth,” Eren didn't know where he had been getting this ball of courage to talk back. But realizing that his biology teacher would possess less murder abilities than his captain, he continued, “Don't you know, sir? You can't hum without shutting your mouth.”

“Aren't you a fucking smartypants? Get your fucking ass out from here.”

Eren laughed a little, but he didn't move an inch from where he was seated. 

Compared to the terrifying Captain of Survey Corps, this version of Levi was a lot more docile, it's almost cute. It was like witnessing the ominous black panther who could rip you to shreds with its fangs had suddenly turned into a feisty little black cat who kicked and hissed over the smallest inconvenience. 

“Are you drinking cold tea, sir?” Upon this question, Levi almost blurted out another ‘don’t you have eyes to see?’, but then he realized he had used that damn insult. Feeling annoyed at his limited vocabulary, he pursed his lips into a thin line and humphed with a roll of his eyes. 

What a hissy black cat indeed, Eren thought. 

“Cold tea can be refreshing to keep you awake, but it wouldn’t be too good for your digestion system.”

“I don't need a brat to remind me of my own teaching field.”

Eren ah-ed and promptly shut his lips tight. He had forgotten that Levi was a biology teacher. Of course, he knew his body better than anyone.

But Eren wasn’t just anyone.

Finishing the last stack of papers, he set it in a neat line on the desk with a proud grin.

The other day, he had seen that Levi owned a makeshift pantry at the corner of his lab, and noticed the he had a teapot. “What if I make a hot tea for you instead? Mind if I use your pantry for a bit?”

“Do whatever you want.”

Thus, Eren strolled to the corner at the back of the lab. There was a small sink, next to it was a neat stack of black tea sachets and a jar of sugar cubes. The so-called pantry was practically empty save for the tea-maker necessities.

With a practiced swiftness, Eren prepared a pot of tea as if it was second nature to him, and in a blink of an eye, he only needed to wait for the earl grey tea to brew completely as he sat by the ceramic counter.

A hint of sweet tea scent wafted in the air and Eren found himself unable to fight back the sleep washing against his eyelids. He propped his chin on his arms, slouching over the pantry counter, trying his best to ward off the attack of drowsiness.

But despite his best efforts, black eventually enveloped his vision as his eyes gave in to rest.

Eren didn’t know how long he had fallen asleep. 

By the time he jolted awake, the brewed pot of tea had long gone cold and only half of it was left—Levi probably helped himself and poured a cup og hot tea when Eren was out—as Eren noted that beside the teapot was a familiar white plastic bag.

It was when he straightened his back that Eren finally realized a thick black blazer almost slipped off his shoulders.

Immediately getting a hold of the piece of clothing before it fell, Eren looked down to examine it.

The material was of a high-quality, expert tailoring with a focus on fit, and the seamstress was exquisitely meticulous with the detailed hand-stitched buttonholes. Its lapel roll was smooth and the collars were well-set. Such was an exquisite garment along with a faint scent of flowery soap drifting from its fine fabric.

Eren paused. Who else could it belong to if not Levi’s?

From a quick scan of his eyes, Eren confirmed that the laboratory was vacant once more. So he tactfully pulled the blazer closer around his person, slouching back into the counter and relaxing his tensed muscles. Then, slowly and stealthy, he buried half his face under the blazer. He took a long whiff of the flowery scent stuck to the clothing, his emerald eyes glinting brilliantly, showing a sharp contrast to the pitch-black blazer covering the lower half of his face.

Waves of emotion surged within him, he remembered a time in the past, when he had done exactly this same thing during his laundry job.

The atmosphere that day had been relaxing, each of Levi's squad members were working the field, cleaning the house, cooking some dinner. Eren was in charge of laundry, so he was leisurely grouping the laundry based on colors when he suddenly saw a familiar deep green coat. 

Wasn't this attire only worn in meetings and formal occasions? And who amongst this small squad would have the duty to report to formal gatherings every few days aside from Captain Levi himself? 

Eren felt like he had caught a hold of a rare treasure, wanting to hide it away in his own personal possessions. Though he didn't dare to do it, knowing Levi would berate him with questions, and maybe hack him with some beatings if he knew Eren ‘lost’ his formal uniform... Eren was still reluctant to part with that coat. 

He imagined how good Levi had always looked way too good in it. The belt would accentuate his slim waist, reaching right at his knees where it would give way to his slender yet toned legs wrapped in the fitted white pants. More times than not did Eren stole a glance or two, and might've had his eyes linger a second too long whenever Levi cladded himself in this coat.

At the recall, Eren felt his face as hot as an iron being held into a furnace. 

Eren clenched his fists around the fabric and, finally giving in to his unbidden desire, buried his face to the coat. There was a faint floral scent that smelled fresh amidst the notable sweat from the piece of laundry. Burying his face deeper into the coat, Eren wished he could just print the man’s scent on his very own body.

Levi’s sweat, his musk, his perfume… Eren wanted all of him.

The more he inhaled the musky yet sweet scent on the coat, the more his brain clogged and stopped thinking. Eren pressed his palm against the crotch of his slacks, painfully straining against the fabric as his arousal only grew stronger.

“Fuck,” was all he could gasp out as he gave in to his desires.

Eren muffled his own voice with the coat, imagining that it was Levi who was holding a palm against his mouth, cold eyes gleaming with warning. His deep voice rang in Eren's ear from behind: “I knew you have always been into me, but just a whiff of my coat could make you a complete goner in this public space? Seriously?”

As small moans spilled from Eren’s lips, he already reached down to undo his pants, his cock aching in his own palm. 

“It must fucking turn you on so much, the thought that someone would come in and see how debauched you truly are.” Levi sneered, his chuckle deep with disdain.

Cruelly. Tauntingly.

His breath fanned against Eren’s ear as his own slender fingers wrapped around Eren’s, stroking and jacking the boy off painfully slow. “You're the hope of humanity? Give me a fucking break. What would people think when they walk in and see that you are just a filthy degenerate who gets hard from a whiff of my scent, jerking off in a public facility like a goddamn animal?”

"Hng.. Ha... Levi..." Eren groaned, clenching the coat tighter in his grip and bit the fabric within his grasp as a last resort to restrain his whimpers within the empty room. 

“Fucking hell." Levi hissed. "Quiet down, Yeager. Are you that desperate to have someone catch you in this shameless act? What a thirsty whore.”

Each of his words sent shivers down Eren’s spine as his breath relentlessly assaulted the tender flesh of the boy's ear. Eren strained to whisper, "Don't call me that..."

"Don't call you what?" Levi raised an eyebrow, seemed uninterested at the boy's request. "You don't want me to call you whore? But you'd still spread your legs for me, right here and right now, if I told you to," a bite at Eren's earlobe, followed by a lick at the flesh, "wouldn't you, Eren?"

Eren's heart lurched, his hand speeding up on his cock as he felt his climax closing in. 

"If you don't want me to call you a cum-thirsty whore, then stop fucking me with you eyes all day and all night. You think I didn't fucking notice it?" Levi laughed, his hand tightening around Eren's to a stop, then ran a teasing thumb across the leaking slit before pressing down. "What would you do if I lose control and fuck you right there, in front of all my squad members? Shit, don't tell me you'd be into that, huh?"

It really took all of the boy’s might to hold it together… That was until a kiss traced down from his ear, down to his jaw, trailing all the way to his lips. The kiss was rough, Eren thought he tasted a tang of blood on his lower lip. 

Then he eyed those grey orbs, glinting with light that seemed to send Eren over the edge. Levi pulled away, then said, “Fucking come already, you brat.”

Eren really had bitten his lips bloody as he jerked himself to a climax.

Now he really had done it.

He watched a trail of his cum caught onto the coat in his hold, and Eren’s face immediately burned with fear… and excitement. 

Ha. How he wished he could just leave his cum on Levi’s coat just like that. That way, his scent would mix together with Levi’s, letting everybody know that his captain belonged to him and only him.

He sat there dazed for a minute longer, two minutes longer.

Then Eren stood up, self-reproaching at how his filthy imaginations had occurred more frequently than whatnot, wondering if this would be considered as some kind of a sexual harassment towards his own superior.

It shouldn’t… right?

After all, it was not Eren’s fault that his commanding officer was just too fucking hot. 

Eren had to run to the bathroom before he returned and scrubbed his cum clean off Levi’s coat. He made a resolve that the next time he did laundry, he would not fall for his desire again if he ever had to wash Levi’s clothes. 

But fall he did.

A couple more times than he really should have. 

It got to a point where Eren had truly lost his reasoning, took away the coat and jerked himself in his own room. When confronted by Levi the next day, he lied with a stupid grin: I scrubbed the coat so hard that some stitches came undone, so I tried to sew it for a while.

Hell, the only one who had come undone was Eren and Eren himself. 

Eren shook his head at his shamelessness in the past lifetime. A teenager going through puberty sure had those terrifying, raging hormones.

He eyed the black blazer draped on his shoulders, and he couldn’t help how his heart beat faster upon the realization that the blazer of this new lifetime had been graced upon him willingly.

Not a chance encounter while he was washing the uniforms, not a stolen whiff inside the laundry room. 

Eren thought about how Levi had stood behind him, in the flesh, as breathtakingly handsome as always in his rolled-up sleeves, carefully tucking Eren’s shuddering body with his tailored blazer. Would Levi had smiled or would his expression remained still and stoic? Eren imagined how those thin lips looked when pulled up slightly as he watched the boy’s peaceful slumber, and Eren felt his heart skipped a beat.

At the end of the day, Levi had covered Eren's sleeping body by his own decision—how very fucking sweet of him. 

Eren buried his face further into the clothes, feeling his desire burn even brighter, as the thoughts of Levi worked like a kindling to his flames. 

A tightness in his pants, and Eren could only blame the hormones in this puberty teenager's body. 

Fuck, whatever. Eren must’ve lost his marbles.

Snapping himself out, Eren turned his attention to the familiar plastic bag next to him. He started fishing out its contents: a bottle of strawberry milk and two korokkes. 

Thus, he bit down on the crispy texture and hummed happily when the mashed-potato filling invaded his taste buds. There was a hint of sweetness at the aftertaste. He thought to himself, he definitely had to say his thanks to Mikasa later. 

Ah, that reminded him, what time had Mikasa and Armin gone to school? He had been rushing about earlier this morning that he hadn’t bid his farewell to the two of them.

Eren walked through the empty laboratory, his second korokke hung between his lips as he stabbed the milk bottle with a straw. Groggy eyes glancing at the clock nailed to the high wall of the lab, its hour hand striking nine o’clock.

“Wow, it’s nine already?”

Huh? What was he wow-ing for?! Wasn’t he fucking late to his first period? And who the hell taught the first class for this morning?!

Therefore, with a shouted fuck, Eren kicked the lab door open and ran through the empty hallways of the school, making wrong turns no less than three times, before he finally slammed open the door to his classroom fifteen minutes later. 

Eren looked like a dumb dog with a treat gnawed between his teeth, curtain bangs having slipped off from his hairclips, messy and clinging to his sweaty temples. His somber eyes now wide awake, though there was still a hint of redness at the corners from having just woken up.

Within a few breaths, his gaze ultimately found the other cold pair of grey eyes across the classroom.

Silence reigned.

At that moment, a droplet of sweat that had clung tightly to Eren’s long lashes rolled straight into his eye. He immediately squeezed it shut and raised his arm to wipe it off roughly, of course, not forgetting another “Fuck,” to slip past his lips.

The classroom was furthermore filled with dread as the chilling glare from their biology teacher seemed to drag the snowy winter six months earlier thanks to this little punk.

"Eren, get your shitty ass to your fucking seat." Levi's voice boomed through the silent classroom. "And meet me at the counselling room during break for your detention."

Notes:

A long chapter again this time because I forgot to update it yesterday lmao

Have been drafting a bit to develop the slowburn. If there's anything you guys want to see in the future, let me know! I'll put it into consideration.

Chapter 6: the devil of paradis paid a visit

In the past, Eren had only visited Mikasa’s house once. A first and last visit before he saved her from the human traffickers and brought her to the safety of his own home. It wasn’t really a great memory of the past, so he never really wanted to recall it.

However, never in his wildest dream did he ever imagine he would step into her house in this world.

Mikasa actually had a home she lived in, but since her guardian was barely home and it was that cousin of hers, she took it upon herself to mostly visit Eren’s house which was just next door.

So, maybe it’d be more fitting to call it her cousin’s house, for that case.

“Ah, I forgot to dry-clean my laundry.” Mikasa dropped her pen and glanced at the clock, its hour hand ticking towards four in the afternoon. With an uneasy frown, she stood up and skipped to the front door. “Eren. As always, make yourself at home. I’m gonna go to the dry-cleaner. Don’t wait on me for the other homework too, I’ve done some parts of it last night.”

“Okay.”

“Also,” she peeked her head back from the door, but after a moment’s hesitation, eventually said, “actually, nevermind. Levi usually shouldn’t be coming home tonight from his business trip.”

At that name mentioned, following the front door closing behind Mikasa’s back, Eren felt his heart almost leapt out.

Of course, he knew Levi was on a trip out of town to accompany a group of student representatives who were joining a biology competition. But the thought of accidentally bumping into the man in his very own house made a mix of emotions swirled in his heart.

A part of him sighed in relief since he couldn’t possibly stand being alone in the same room as Levi—lest his imagination would wander wild again—but another part of him… Eren couldn’t deny there was a twinge of disappointment. 

After the blazer occasion, Eren noticed that the man was actually not as bad as he appeared.

Of course, his sharp words still jabbed right into your heart, just like how his sharp gaze was unrelenting. But, once in a while, Eren would notice how this man that appeared so tough on the outside, could turn gentle when needed to be. Like the one time Eren brought a classmate with a sprained ankle from PE, he watched how Levi treated the boy in the infirmary with the utmost care and, if Eren wasn’t paying such close attention, he would’ve missed the look of worry in Levi’s grey orbs.

Or how Levi would occasionally pass on Mikasa’s plastic bag of korokke despite grumbling under his breath. Or the slightest hint of a smile on his thin lips when the class cheered for the announcement of their school festival.

One time, Eren had brought this up during the outing with Mikasa and the-rarely-seen Armin, as they chewed down on their lunch. He said with a food-pilled mouth, cheeks bulging like a hamster, “Do you know that he managed to dissect the organs preserved in our lab so cleanly? I think he might actually have the skills of a surgeon.”

But instead, Armin frowned. “You watched him dissect?”

“Yeah, the incredible accuracy was insane too. I wanted to give it a try, but you know how it went,” Eren pulled on a frown, mimicking a low voice belonging to Levi. “He scolded me: You’re so lousy and messy at this. Scram!”

Mikasa and Armin shared a look that plainly said: That was to be expected… But Mikasa didn’t have the heart to blurt it out on Eren’s brilliant smile, so she asked, “You stayed at the lab again? Is it for another detention?”

“Nope.”

“No?”

“No.”

Mikasa leveled him with a mild look. “You can be honest with us.”

“Ha ha, it really wasn’t. I was just there to pass time,” Eren smiled with a wave of his hand. In his heart, he continued: And it was to return the blazer he lent me. But nobody knew about the blazer, nor did Eren want to tell. To him, this felt like a secret rendezvous shared between Levi and him. So, he only continued with a “He is not really all that bad.”

Such words described for Hange, their other biology teacher with a sunny personality, or for Erwin, the history teacher with practical explanations that made the classes a lot less boring, would be entirely expected. Needless to say, they were the awarded favorite teachers for some time now. 

But Levi? He was an exceptionally good-looking teacher, of course, but his ill-tempered nature was so widely known that students would rather keep their heads low or pretend to look out towards the window rather than greet him when they happened to walk past him in the hallways.

Levi was anything but not that bad .

So, when Eren said those words, Mikasa and Armin shared another look: That old geezer had traumatized Eren so much that Eren seemed to have trouble with clear judgement?

Many weeks passed of Eren squabbling about Levi this and Levi that where most of his chatters contained detailed observations of the said man. It was almost like he was an obsessed scientist and Levi was his object of interest. It got to a point that his two friends could only look at him helplessly.

What was once a shared look of sympathy, had turned into a shared look of dumbfoundedness, thinking: This masochist of a sixteen years old actually seemed to have a crush on that abominable beast—Levi?

But good friends as they were, they kept their thoughts to themselves so as to not spoil Eren’s mood.

Eren, a sixteen years old who was going through puberty, having a crush on a killer biology teacher who was almost double his age? This was definitely just a phase.

But little did they know how extremely wrong they were, since this devil of Paradis's obsession had been born from years and years of yearning, more than a millennium ago.

When the sun started to set in the west, coloring the horizon with its orange hues, Eren found himself deeply buried in the piles of homework. He sat hunched over on the coffee table, pen scribbling and his calculator would go tick tack tick as he did his math papers. Once he finished math, he moved to physics, then he moved to chem homework.

Constantly writing down answers, erasing them after some considerations, penned out a new answer every time. He had lost track of time when the front door opened with a click , so he blurted out, “Mikasa, what took you so long? I’m starved, should we get some dinner?”

Eren heard the door close back, but there came no answer. So he looked up and, this time, he could feel his heart actually leapt out.

“Sir!” Eren stood up almost immediately, his knee hitting the edge of the table accidentally, causing him to hiss in pain as he hunched back down to hug it close to his chest. The corners of his eyes had a faint redness to them, as if he was holding back tears of pain from the stiff muscles of his legs added with the shot of pain. Still, his emerald eyes shone so brightly when he looked back up at the man standing frozen at the front door, smiling, “Welcome home.”

“What are you doing here?”

The boy scratched his head bashfully, waving his hand towards the coffee table. “Homeworks.”

“Does this seem like your home to do your homework? Get the fuck out of my home.”

Bewildered, Eren only mumbled under his breath, “Why can’t it be my home?”

It was more to himself, rather than a reply to Levi, thinking: If it's called a 'home'-work, then what did it matter whose home he was using to finish it?

Levi had recovered from his initial surprise, heading towards the stairs to his bedroom. But upon Eren’s ambiguous words that sounded like the boy was claiming Levi's home as his own, he tripped over his own feet at the first step and had to hold onto the rails to steady himself.

And fuck was that embarrassing. 

Levi could only shoot the boy with a silent glare and hastily made his way upstairs.

Eren already spent weeks observing this man, thus he knew better than anyone that Levi was mostly just barking crude remarks because of his thin face. Though he might still send a flying punch to kick Eren out of his house, Eren figured he’d be docile if Eren didn’t try anything weird to piss the man off.

After all, Mikasa was the one who invited him over. Levi wouldn’t be rude enough to actually kick out his cousin’s guest, would he?

Seeing that he only had his biology homework left, Eren stretched his body over the table with a satisfied smile. Starving as he was, he sent Mikasa a short message, asking her permission to make a simple dinner, before skipping his way to the neat and thoroughly-clean kitchen.

Eren explored the kitchen, thinking to himself that Levi wouldn’t bother to come down any sooner. He took everything in his sight: the white kitchen counter was spotless, a minimum amount of kitchen things that were precisely arranged by their size. A dried sink with no traces of leftovers stuck at the drain. The fluorescent light of the counters shone upon the rows of plates and glasses with intricate designs, clearly showing they’re of the finest quality. In the pantry side were a small rack consisting of varying tea brands, a jar of sugar cubes, some more jars of small cookies to be served with a morning tea, and an airtight container of crumbs. 

Eren frowned and took a closer look, finding the panko breadcrumbs an unusual appearance amidst Levi’s pantry specified for his teas.

Did Levi of this world like to… cook?

Upon a simple OK from Mikasa’s chat, Eren took on her words and really did make himself at home. He opened the small refrigerator, quite delighted to see the half-full yet complete ingredients of all kinds: potatoes, fresh pork meat, eggs, to vegetables of varying kinds and seasonings.

He thought back to the panko breadcrumbs, and after a minute consideration, decided to cook a tonkotsu ramen. Then he considered a little more, whether or not he should make a few more servings for Mikasa and Levi.

So he called Mikasa and she replied with a “Nah, I’m good. The dry-clean is taking a while, so I already had dinner nearby. Just cook whatever, Levi wouldn’t mind as long as you keep it clean.”

“Should I cook dinner for Levi, too? He hasn’t been going down since he came back, but I feel like it’s going to be rude if I use stuff from his kitchen just for myself.”

Mikasa pondered with a hum. “Levi doesn’t usually eat dinner, though.”

“...He doesn’t?”

“Yeah, he usually settles with a pot of tea and calls them dinner.”

Troubled by this new information, Eren only managed a few words of thanks and see you soon before hanging up. His frown only deepened when he looked at the bunch of equipped kitchen along with the various ingredients, thinking back again at how Levi’s figure was unusually slender despite the toned muscles on his body.

It appeared that the man’s diet was way too lax in this life. So, Eren took it upon himself to cook two bowls for himself and the man upstairs.

More often than not, Eren found himself extremely distraught by the thoughts of his past life’s memories. Thus, Eren quickly found himself immersed in cooking some simple dishes to distract himself.

He combined the seasonings to soak into the pork meat in a bag, humming as he let it marinade and sliced them into neat cuts. Then he combined all the ingredients in a small sauce pan to cook the soy bacon tare and miso tare. Just as he submerged two eggs into a boiling pot over the stove with a satisfying plop , a deep voice came from behind him, “The hell are you still doing here?”

“Cooking.”

“I thought I told you to get the hell out of my house.”

Eren replied with a cheeky grin. “Now, now. Mikasa invited me here in the first place and told me to make myself home. How could you have the heart to kick me out from my temporary home, Sir?” 

Levi’s eyes were as cold as the winter breeze as he nailed the boy in his kitchen with a glare. “Get the hell—"

“Yes, yes. I will get the hell out of your home,” Eren sighed, “just let me finish making this dinner first, at least. It’s already halfway through.”

Seeing no way out to beat this stubborn young boy, Levi rolled his eyes and made his way towards the pantry. He boiled water, ripped open a black tea sachet, and watched Eren busying about in his kitchen while he waited against the counter. He warned, “Don’t make a mess in my kitchen.”

“Aren’t you seeing how spotlessly clean your kitchen is although I’m busy cooking right here?” Eren pulled out the boiled eggs and submerged them in a bowl of ice water to chill. After a moment’s hesitation, he shot his head back up to Levi with a grin. “Sir, sorry. Can you pass me the panko breadcrumbs behind you?”

Levi shot Eren another glare from beneath his fine lashes. 

If Eren’s hands weren’t so thoroughly dirty with smudges of seasonings, he would’ve grabbed the container himself. But… forget it. He was just about to step aside and wash his hands at the sink, when a warm presence came from beside him, then a hand stretched out with a spoonful of panko under his gaze.

“How many spoonfuls?”

“Three is plenty,” Eren replied with a mutter under his breath. If it weren't for their close proximity, Levi would definitely have missed it.

The boy watched that fair hand scoop three spoonfuls of breadcrumbs to cover the pork cutlets with. Only when Levi had returned to put the container back into the pantry did Eren finally let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

“Shit.” 

Levi had just dipped his tea sachet into the boiling pot, the gentle colors of the leaves dispersed satisfyingly into the pot, so his mood was slightly lifted. When he heard this curse, he only glanced at Eren’s panicking state. “What’s wrong?”

“I forgot I should’ve fried the pork first before placing the tare.” Eren thought about how Levi would definitely refuse such a half-assed cooking, especially with his habit of skipping dinners. Maybe he might kick Eren out now and never lend him the kitchen ever again if Eren came for a visit again. At this thought, Eren accidentally poured a bit too much oil into the pan, trembling hands tried to turn on the stove, but after several failed attempts, sweat only made his palms a lot more clammy. “Fuck, did the gas run out?”

The moment that question was said, a hand covered his own. The hand was fair and slender, but it was inexplicably strong when it pressed the stove knobs over Eren’s own hands, then turned the knob with ease. A hot breath brushed against Eren’s own ears, asking mildly, “Is this much fire enough?”

Well, fuck Eren’s life, because it seemed that the fire from the stove wasn’t the only thing being turned on. By the time Eren looked over his shoulder, there was Levi. All the more handsome with his brow slightly raised, his gaze unwavering as he gazed back into Eren’s own. From Eren’s higher vantage point, he could see the worn-stretched hems of those grey long-sleeves, where a peek of that fair yet extremely well-toned body slipped into his—

Where the fuck  was he looking at?!

Eren pulled away with haste. “Enough, sir!”

Levi eyed the boy, then at the frying pan. “You go tend to the broth, I’ll help you fry the pork cutlets.”

With that, Eren tried to feign propriety as he came to ladle the tonkotsu broth into the bowls, stirring it to mix. Trying to break the ice of their silence, he said, “I didn’t know you’d be good at cooking, Sir.”

“I live alone at this age and time, what do you expect?”

“But Mikasa told me you don’t usually have dinner, and you only drink morning tea for breakfast. Also, you eat lunch at the school canteen.” As soon as the words left his mouth, Eren wanted to slap himself in the face. Why the fuck was he sounding like a fussy wife telling his husband what to eat and when to eat? So he quickly added, “Ah. I just thought it rather odd since you have such a well-filled refrigerator and complete kitchen.”

But Levi only answered, “I like to cook side dishes and snacks more.”

“What about steamed or simmered food, like buns or stew?”

“Stew?” Levi paused, then shook his head. “I’ve never tried making one.”

“Then fried dishes, it is. Ah,” Eren started, and when he saw the questioning look on the latter’s face, eventually asked, “then, have you tried making korokke, Sir? I myself have tried to do it several times. But they weren’t as nearly as good as the ones you— I mean, Mikasa bought for me from the canteen.”

To no surprise, Levi stayed silent.

Eren wondered if he had accidentally offended the man somehow, so he ventured more, saying, “If I manage to cook one that tasted even half as nice as the one in the canteen, I’ll bring it for you.”

“Don’t be stupid. I can buy it for myself, so don’t bother.”

Though what was the Devil of Paradis known for if it weren’t for his unyielding will to never back down? Eren just laughed it off. “How can you compare my cooking with the ones in the canteen? My korokke will have a special touch of earnestness because I want to give it to you, Sir.”

Levi shot him a glance. “Are you bribing me right now?”

“Maybe,” said Eren with an unbridled smile. Beneath his lashes, his eyes glowed brilliantly, a characteristic akin to this gallant youth. “Then, maybe you’d go easier on me with your punishments.”

“Ha. You wish.”

Levi maintained a cold expression, but his heart was filled with warmth when Eren’s laugh filled the kitchen once more. He tried his best to keep his composure in check, neck aching from fighting back the urge to turn his head and submerge himself in the sight of that boy’s bright smile. The grip on the pan’s hold was so tight, it might break at any given moment from the strength he was exercising, an only outlet for his unbidden yearning for this boy.

Fuck, he so badly wanted to soak himself in the boy's laugh forever.

“Sir.”

Levi didn’t reply.

Eren repeated. “Sir.”

“Levi.”

“What?”

“Just call me Levi when we’re outside of school.” After a pause, Levi cleared his throat and added, “You’re Mikasa’s friend. It’s weird to see my cousin’s friend calling me ‘sir this’ and ‘sir that’.”

Levi thought himself clever for acting so natural upon this request. No, it wasn’t a request. It’s a demand which he had thought for a while. Yes, it truly was just weird to see your cousin’s friend up and call you ‘sir’ day in and day out.

It truly wasn’t because being called ‘sir’ by this beautiful boy, who he had been crushing on, totally made Levi's pants go tight.

When Eren remained silent, Levi tried his best to remain as nonchalant as ever to glance up at him. “What did you call me for?”

“Nothing,” Eren smiled as he glanced back at the pot of broth in front of him. He carefully added noodles to each of the bowls with his head lowered, saying, “Just wanted to ask if you really don’t eat dinner as Mikasa said.”

Levi had noticed the two bowls of ramen on the counter, though he didn't dare to hope for anything like Eren cooking him a dinner. After all, Levi treated the boy so harshly at school, why would Eren even be considerate of him? They both knew that Mikasa was stuck at the dry-cleaner shop because of the rain, so she’d gotten herself dinner outside. Levi finally came to a conclusion: Eren was offering the dinner he made for Mikasa to Levi instead, lest it go to waste. When he thought of this, a pang shot in his heart, but he managed to reply with a cold voice. “She loves spouting nonsense about me. If I don’t eat dinner, I'll die.”

This uncharacteristic attempt at a joke pulled a rich laugh from Eren, and this time, Levi didn’t force himself to look away. He let himself drown in the view of Eren’s laughter, and if the boy had even looked up once to gaze back at him, he would notice the gentle yearning brimming from those grey eyes.

But it really was too bad that Eren missed this slip-up of warmth from Levi.

Levi turned off the stove, took a pair of chopsticks, and placed the fried pork cutlets into each bowl carefully. Eren saw an opening and took a slice of the pork cutlet to dump it into his mouth. He hah -ed from the piping hot meat, earning himself a glance that clearly said are you fucking stupid from the man holding the frying pan, but the boy only smiled. “You’re so good at frying this. The crumbs are extremely crispy, but the meat remains tender and juicy.”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full.” 

“Yes, sir. Yes, sir." Eren nodded mischievously, emphasizing the ‘sir’ in his words, which made Levi’s face twitch ever so slightly. Eren turned to take the eggs and green onions, and those fair hands holding the frying pan slipped more cuts of pork on one bowl than the other. So when Eren was just about to add boiled eggs to the top, he was bewildered, “Huh? Why does this bowl have more meat?”

“I don’t eat fried foods.”

Eren was dumbfounded. “But you cooked these fried pork cutlets so perfectly well, though?”

“I just felt like cutting off oil-fried food,” was all Levi replied with before he took a jar of green onions and scattered them over the presentable bowls of tonkotsu. “Bring these to the dining table. I’ll pour the tea before they get cold.”

Eren, finally finishing his piece of dinner with a mushroom on top, hummed in satisfaction. He brought the burning hot bowls with an “Alright, Levi!” thrown over his shoulder.

Night fell when the last remaining light of the sun dipped beneath the horizon. Against the window in the kitchen, rain started to pitter-patter relentlessly. However, amidst the rainy night, Levi’s heart was like a molted iron, flames rising from the yearning he tried so hard to suppress. After a few minutes of pulling himself together, Levi walked to the dining room and sat across from Eren.

The entire time Eren ate his dinner while squabbling about, Levi’s composure remained steady. His gaze was as cold as the night air, his response came as curt as ever. It really was lucky for him that the fluorescent lighting was dim enough to obscure the tips of his ears that were flushing red.

Notes:

Very long chapter. I had a writer’s block for a while. I will rest too.

I think we got a little peek at Levi's POV here?

Chapter 7: the devil of paradis’s korokke

“What is your class’s project for the school festival coming up next month?”

Eren pinched the collar of his PE uniform and started fanning himself. Sweat thoroughly drenched his clothes, but changing to the usual uniform in this state would feel even worse. So he settled on changing after the break was over. Walking down the winding hallway, Eren pondered a bit before replying to Armin, “Something about a maid cafe. Not that it’s any of my business, I’m the one in charge of cooking, so I’ll be at the behind-the-scenes work.”

“A classic.” Armin commented with a chuckle. “What are you going to cook, though? Have your cooking skills gotten better lately?”

“What is that supposed to mean?” A laughter broke from Eren’s lips as he elbowed the blonde. “Nothing too complicated, just the omurice, chicken katsu, and maybe tonkotsu. I was also thinking of making korokke.”

Mikasa chimed in. “Korokke?”

“I’ve tried several attempts, but they weren’t as great as what the lady from the canteen made.” Regardless Eren wore a proud grin on his face, his hand forming a fist as determination filled his youthful eyes. “So I’m going to ask her for the recipe. Or, well. At least, buy a couple more korokkes to compare with the ones I make myself.”

Mikasa stared at him in silence, her expression remained unreadable. "I see." 

When the three spotted the packed canteen in the distance, they immediately skipped over to stand at the end of the long line. Eren grumbled under his breath for a while, complaining how the summer heat had only gotten worse despite the fact that autumn should be coming soon.

Just as they were close to the counter, Mikasa slapped a hand over her forehead. “Ah, I forgot that I have to return the charger I borrowed from Sasha yesterday. I’ll have to go first.”

“Can’t you just return it after the last period?” Eren looked over with a frown. “Sasha’s class is in the west building. You’ll have to skip lunch if you head over to her now.”

“She told me she’d need to use it for a presentation in her class after this break, so I’ve got no choice.” Mikasa sighed, then turned to Armin with a hopeful glance. “I didn’t pack a lunchbox either, but our class is next to each other. Armin, can you bring me a bento box if you have time later? I’ll pay you back.”

“Don’t sweat it. The usual bento box?”

Thus, by the time Armin and Eren reached the canteen lady, Mikasa hastily waved a Yes, thanks! before she disappeared behind the crowd.

Armin started without losing a beat. “Two tempura bento boxes, one pudding, and one strawberry pie.”

“That’d be ¥950, please.” The lady smiled warmly as she received the exact payment, packing the orders into a small cream-colored plastic bag before handing it over to the blonde.

“Oh, I like the new color of the plastic bag.”

Armin eyed Eren with a slightly raised eyebrow. “Did you hit your head in class? The plastic bag has always been this color since forever.”

Eren wanted to argue, even preparing to take out the white plastic bag that Mikasa had always given to him along with the korokkes, but when the canteen lady’s gentle gaze was already directed to him, he could only puff his cheeks and swallow his words back.

“One strawberry milk and two korokkes, please.”

“We no longer sell korokke, would you like something else?”

Despite himself, Eren couldn’t help but pouted. “Oh, is it sold out today? Then can I come by for them tomorrow?”

But to his surprise, the lady shook her head. “We haven’t sold korokke in a very long while. The lady who made them already quit last year.”

Eren’s eyebrows rose.

The lady hadn’t guessed the intentions behind Eren’s surprise, and she couldn’t bear seeing the blatant disappointment in the young boy’s eyes. Feeling bad for Eren, she eventually offered, “Perhaps you want karaage or tempura instead?”

Only then did Eren snap out of it. “But I just ate a korokke bought from here two days ago?”

“You bought it from here?”

“No, my friend did.”

“Mn,” the lady pondered for a while, then smiled courteously, “are you sure she bought it from here ? Could it be that she bought it from another store?”

“There is only one canteen in this school, though.”

Of course the lady knew of this better than anyone. She had worked here in the past decade, a woman inching to her forties who had remained despite her co-workers already coming and going. She chuckled at the boy’s bewildered expression and said, “You can check the facts with your friend later. If nothing else, then the strawberry milk will be ¥150.”

Neither Armin nor Eren said anything the whole time they walked to sit on an empty table in the canteen hall. Armin opened the lid to his box and started eating in silence, feigning indifference to the gloomy boy sitting across from him.

“Have I been eating a ghost korokke?”

“Don’t be absurd,” Armin countered. “Mikasa probably bought it from another market and didn’t bother with telling you the details.”

“How could it be? We walk to school together, so I would know if she bought it somewhere along the way. Her korokkes are always crispy and warm, like they’re freshly picked up from the frying pan.”

Armin chewed on his tempura. “Then, could it be that she cooked it herself?”

“Why would she?”

“Why wouldn’t she?”

Eren paused for a long while, before he settled: “No.”

“Why not?”

Eren was very familiar with Mikasa. While the girl was extremely skilled in cooking, she couldn't be bothered with cooking in the middle of her packed schedule. The only times he had seen her in the kitchen would be when she was helping his mother to prepare breakfast or dinner. 

Thinking up to this point, Eren straightened his back and frowned. In his ears, a voice rang: I like to cook side dishes and snacks more .

As he sipped listlessly on his strawberry milk, his eyes caught sight of Levi entering the canteen hall. He froze for a long moment, then choked . Unfortunately this unsightly side of him pulled several attention towards himself, even Armin was gaping at him, and needless to say, Levi’s own gaze landed on him.

From where he sat, Eren could see the frown lines on that handsome face deepened, the frost covering his grey orbs seemed to chilled by a few degrees, even those thin lips were pulled into a scowl. Eren was used to being scorned by Levi, but he only choked on his drink by surprise. What was so disgusting about it?

“He is probably disgusted that you’re still in your sweaty PE clothes, maybe he’d complain about how your stink had wafted through the entire hall and swept away his appetite.”

Eren barked back. “I don’t stink that bad.”

Armin only held back his laughter as he watched Eren steal a few more glances towards the man who had settled on sitting at the cornermost canteen—the man remained completely unbothered and detached from the rest of the bustling crowds in the canteen.

“Armin, you don’t say…” Eren trailed off, hesitation lacing his tone as he stopped mid-sentence. As he chewed on his straw a few more, he braced himself to rephrase, “Do you think Levi can cook?”

This time, Armin eyed the man sitting by himself at the corner of the canteen hall, then at his friend right across from him. He played with his chopsticks for a while, picking and shredding the tempura into a few slices, before he spoke, “You don’t think Mr. Ackerman was the one who cooked all the korokkes for you, right?”

Well, when Armin put it out so blatantly like that, it did sound extremely absurd. So he could only throw Armin a stupid grin, scratching his head abashedly. “Wild guess, huh? Forget it.”

“Of course I’d forget it. That man cooking you a side snack every so often?” Armin sighed exasperatedly, throwing a shredded piece of tempura to his own mouth. “I’d rather believe the dinosaurs are still alive than believing such a rumor. Dream on.”

Just like that, Eren made a resolve to ask Mikasa about where the korokkes had been coming from, and continued to chat with Armin regarding the school festival preparations. By the time they finished their lunch and stood up to return to their class, Eren noticed that his lone biology teacher was long gone.

Eren walked Armin to his class that was closer to the canteen, then he made a few more turns along the winding hallway to head to his own classroom. The sun was shining high up in the sky, abating heat burning through the hot air when he passed by an open corridor, as wind blew against his already dried gym clothes. 

When Eren stepped over the door towards the next building, he froze.

What should’ve been a bustling corridor filled with students in high school uniforms was instead a dark aisle with a few soldiers stationed in front of a couple of wooden doors. Armed with riffles, cladded in white button-up collared shirt and light-brown high-waisted jacket, complete with fitted white pants, dark brown waist skirt, and knee-high boots. 

Eren knew this uniform all too well like the back of his hand—he knew it all his life . And such a sight wasn't one belonging to the world he was living in just a second ago.

Shocked by the sudden change of his surroundings, Eren squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. This couldn’t possibly happen. He couldn’t possibly just give up and leave the life he was having that easily. He refused to return to the looming nightmare of the past. 

Eren took a few steps back, but he had his eyes closed, and thus tripping over his own shoelaces, Eren braced himself for a fall that never came. Instead of feeling relieved, Eren’s heartbeats only quickened when he felt the cold hands that had caught his arms from behind. “You… are you feeling unwell?”

“Levi.” 

Eren’s voice was shaking. His mind was such a jumbled mess that the boy hadn’t realized he blurted out the man’s name instead of a polite ‘sir’ they had agreed to still use within the school area. Levi shot a quick glance to their empty surroundings, and after a beat of relief that no one else had heard Eren’s slip up, he gazed back at the unsteady boy within his hold. “Eren, do you need to go to the infirmary?”

“No, just give me a moment.” 

Sensing something amiss, Levi watched Eren pull himself away from his touch to crouch down. The boy kept to himself as he hugged his own body tightly, a hand tightly closed over his nose and mouth as he rocked back and forth, an attempt to calm his nerves. 

The bell had rung a while ago, the hallways were empty. Levi shuffled to kneel in front of the boy.

By then, Levi got a clear view of the blood drips seeping from the gaps of Eren’s fingers, as well as the beads of tears rolling down from those tightly shut lashes. Silently reproaching himself for not noticing it earlier, he hastily took out a white handkerchief from his pocket, and offered it to Eren while saying, “You’re in no condition to go to the class. Let me take you to the infirmary.”

Only then did Eren finally open his eyes, and upon the apparent fear in those once brilliant orbs, Levi found himself baffled.

Wasn't this kid just fine when he was fooling around in the canteen hall? He hadn't even changed from his sweaty PE uniform that made Levi frowned in distaste. He didn't really like how Eren was letting himself drenched in those wet clothes, all with how it clung and accentuated his body, in such a crowded hall. Also, what if he got sick? But Levi knew better than to scold Eren during break, and in a bustling canteen hall to boot, so he had to let it slide.

So what had happened in the span of a few minutes when Levi was absent that got Eren this terrified? Not even Levi’s utmost anger during his classes had gotten Eren this much freaked out.

Eren glanced down at the handkerchief, his expression went through a few changes, yet he didn’t reach out to take the proffered cloth nor did he say anything. So Levi took it upon himself to hold the clean handkerchief against the boy’s nosebleed, forcing the hand covering half of his face to grab it over his own dripping blood. He chided gently, “If you’re in no condition to come to school, then you should've just taken a sick leave. What are you overexerting yourself for?”

But Levi’s reprimands remained a muffled noise in Eren’s ears. He slowly lifted his fluttering lashes to look at the expressionless man kneeling in front of him, completely not giving a damn of how his pants would be soiled if he kneeled on the corridor floor so carelessly, despite his own aversion to dirt. Though his face remained straight, the gaze of concern was apparent in those gentle eyes. 

With the two figures kneeling across from each other, Eren felt himself brought back into the memories from a faraway past. Standing from a high vantage point in the south edge of Wall Rose, he lined up with the other soldiers and journalists, looking down at his newly hardening ability that could help Hange’s new experiment. As the creation proved itself useful, the crowd over the Walls cheered and rejoiced. Eren himself had sighed in relief before he tasted a tang of blood slipping into his lips.

“Ah.”

That time, his captain was the first to notice the blood dripping from his nose. Eren had kneeled in an attempt to let his blood drop free to the concrete, and the latter followed without caring for the dirty soil underneath him. With a swift motion, his slender hand stretched out to offer a white handkerchief, his voice low amidst Hange’s excited outburst. “Eren, you’re in no condition to continue.” 

“No, Captain. I’m fine.”

Levi didn’t like this answer, but he held back his stern rebukes and only said, “We can try the experiment another day. What are you overexerting yourself for?”

“We did it, Eren!” Hange’s yell was thunderous, and Levi’s voice would’ve drowned if Eren wasn’t paying such close attention to him. When Hange turned around, they froze with a concerned look, calling at him, “Eren?”

“He probably overused his Titan powers.” Levi piped in. His tone stern, but worry was clear within his sharp words: a hint of reprimand to the mad scientist before him. “All he’s done is hardening experiments lately.”

Feeling guilty, Hange bent down slightly. “Sorry, Eren.”

“There’s nothing to apologize for, Hange.” Eren wiped his nosebleed on the white cloth resolutely, his determined eyes glanced back up at Hange with a reassuring smile. “Who gives a damn if I’m tired?”

Back then, Eren hadn’t dared to look back up at the man kneeling in front of him, fearing that his resolve to seal Wall Maria as soon as possible would falter when he looked at those grey eyes laced with worry.

But in this life, Eren had been able to gaze at Levi's concerned look with all the greed he had, all the longing he kept, all he wanted with no need to hold himself back.

In this life, he was free. So, he chose to freely enjoy the warmth that Levi lent to him, even for a while. 

When Levi saw that the boy didn’t seem to have the strength to speak, he slung the boy’s arm around his own shoulder, propping Eren over his own weight and led him to the way of the infirmary.

Chapter 8: the devil of paradis knew it was you

The summer sunlight streamed through the gaps of the white curtains, billowing softly as wind blew into the vacant room, spare for the two figures inside. One stood by a medicine cabinet acting as a small pharmacy, while the other laid down across the bed at the furthermost corner.

Levi put a medicine tablet and cut open a small vitamin capsule, poured them in a small mortar and pounded them with the set of pestle. When he saw the mix of meds had compounded into fine powder, he took a piece of korokke from the side table, made a small cut to the crispy texture, then scooped the meds into the soft flesh of the mashed potatoes inside. He lightly pressed on the small cut with the pads of his thumbs, then put it on top of the small pile of korokkes in the white plastic bag.

The man walked over to the corner of the room, lifted the thin fabric that covered the patient inside, and watched the boy sleeping on the infirmary bed with an impassive gaze.

Light seeped and kissed the boy's tanned skin gently, a sheen layer of cold sweat covered Eren’s forehead. The thick lashes closed around those heavy-ladden eyelids, hiding the mesmerizing hue of green that Levi had always wanted to covet for his own. 

Levi remembered the first time he met Eren, a boy who had just moved next door with his family. And what had initially started as a seed of wanting to care for this neighbor kid in his heart, started to grow into covetous greed of possessing the boy all to himself. 

But time had passed in the blink of an eye. 

The little boy had turned into a teenager, along with the cousin Levi basically raised. They were now sophomores in the high school he worked in.

He sighed in lament, the boy had grown more gallant and youthful, while Levi was getting older and duller. Brilliant emerald eyes against the eye-bagged grey ones, sun-kissed skin in the color of honey against the pale and fair skin, sunny and gentle personality against a harsh and ill-tempered nature. 

Such was a striking contrast between the two, definitely not a match made in heaven nor hell. 

Levi shook his head, it'd be best to tuck away his feelings in the innermost corner in his heart, let it rot there along his old age. He felt it truly a shameful thing to find himself yearning to covet that boy’s heart, wanting to get a little light of that gentleness and warmth that he had longed for his entire lone life. 

The more he thought about it, the redder his face got. After all, how could a teacher like his student in that way? Totally absurd, completely shameless. 

Drowned in his thoughts, Levi didn't realize the thick lashes of the boy fluttered open. By the time he realized it, his grey eyes had caught sight once more of that pair of green jewels. 

It was only then did he realize how stupid he must've appeared: one hand holding onto the curtain of the bed, while the other was carrying a white plastic bag of korokkes.

His thin face burned with shame and, in the heat of the moment, he immediately threw the plastic bag to the bedside table with a scowl. 

“ Captain ,” rasped Eren. 

“Eat,” said Levi. 

Unfortunately, they had spoken at the same time. Levi's stern voice overlapped with Eren's hoarse one, so he didn't manage to catch on. 

“Sorry. What did you say?”

Eren, though, had heard Levi's voice clearly. He shook his head lightly and pushed himself up on the bed. Reaching for the bag of korokke beside his bed, his lips tugged into a smile, “Did Mikasa tell you to bring these to me again?”

Levi maintained a composed exterior, nodding his head despite the juddering of his heart. “What does she even see me as? Her personal delivery guy or something?”

Eren stilled for a bit at Levi's attempt at a joke, then he let out a soft laugh. He took the croquette on the top of the pile, bit onto the crisp and let the sweet taste of mashed potatoes spread onto his mouth. For a second, he opened his lips to say something, but then he shut his mouth again. 

However, Levi caught on this sight, so he asked, “What are you thinking about?”

Eren paused for a moment, seeming to ponder his words, before saying, “I just thought of something.”

“Thought of what?”

“The korokke is slightly bitter than usual.” Eren's emerald eyes were clear and dewy, like a pool of spring water. “Did you make some changes to your recipe?”

“No, I didn't change anything. It's bitter because I added…” Levi immediately shut his mouth mid-sentence. He froze right where he stood, palms turning clammy, heartbeats getting wilder  that he felt it might drop to his stomach anytime. 

His first thought was, ‘ What the hell? ’ His second thought was, ‘ How did Eren find out? ’ And his third thought was, ‘ Was Mikasa such a blabbermouth that she couldn’t keep such a simple secret? ’ 

But when Levi finally braced himself to lift his eyes and meet Eren’s, he saw it.

The understanding looming inside that clear pair of bejeweled eyes, as his soft smile turned all the brighter when it clicked to him. 

Eren had been testing the water, setting a trap to lure this black cat into confessing his own deeds, and now that very damn cat had unwittingly got trapped inside the cage. Upon this realization, Levi silently reproached himself.

“You really did cook me a lot of korokkes.”

A crack in his deep voice. “I didn’t .”

Eren could only throw him a bewildered look, shaking his head lightly as he ate the rest of the croquette in hand, and chuckled, “Alright, alright. You didn’t .” He paused, intrigued that he could almost see the muscles of the other man relaxed a bit. Then, he added, “Still, thank you.”

Levi exercised a scowl on his face. “I told you, I didn’t make—”

“Thank you for delivering it, then.”

Levi felt that Eren had just coaxed him like how one would persuade a kid, and he wasn’t very delighted at this situation. He felt that his dignity just went down the drain and now he didn’t know how to save his face anymore. If Eren probed any further and found out about Levi’s true feelings, then…

What then…?

The man could almost see how those brilliant eyes would soon be filled with terror, his beautiful smile turning into an expression of pure disgust. After all, how dare this old man yearn for him? How could this bad-tempered man possibly want to have this lovable boy all to himself? How dare Levi even think of deserving this boy? Grasping at his last straw, Levi tried to make a run for it. “If you’re going to keep spouting nonsense, then you should either return to class or go to bed. I’m leaving.”

“Wait.” Eren was a beat quicker to take hold at the hem of that black blazer. Yet he had moved too quickly, barely even a few minutes awake from his collapse, and now he could see stars swimming in his vision. Holding his head with his other hand, Eren muttered under his breath, “Please, don’t leave.”

“I have to teach in the next period,” Levi lied.

Eren peeked at the ticking clock hung up on the wall. “There are still twenty minutes left.”

“I have to go…” Levi trailed off. He had wanted to make up another lie, something about walking to the next building could take him forever—although it definitely wouldn’t—but when he held his gaze against those glistening eyes, Levi knew he was utterly defeated. He dropped his defenses, yanked the hem of his clothes that Eren was holding, and walked out of the curtains without saying another word.

Eren had thought Levi would stay, he was confident Levi would’ve stayed. After all, Levi was so nice to him. Whether in this life or in the past one, Levi had only shown him kindness. Thus, Eren had always wanted to exploit it, covet it, be the center of it all.

Until the day came where Levi gave up on him.

That day in the dark prison cell, Eren had thrown the homemade stew Levi brought him in a fit of rage. Levi’s face didn’t give anything away, neither joy nor sorrow, and now that Eren was thinking back, not even the usual scowl graced his face. If anything, there was a hint of remorse… and disappointment. Eren couldn’t remember clearly, the cell was certainly too dark to make anything out of such subtle expressions.

What he was sure of was that Levi had spared some time to visit him before he left for the forest with Zeke in tow. That was consideration enough on his part, Eren thought.

But one thing Eren had recalled was the voice that haunted him in every nightmares to this day, it rang in his ears: You are too far gone, truly beyond saving. Before Levi eventually turned away and left Eren all alone again with the torment in his head.

Eren had made a resolve to start anew in this lifetime, so how was it that… Levi was leaving him once more?

Fear started to gnaw at his heart, it pricked his bones and burned his skin, leaving him drowning in the whirlwind of panic. Without a second thought, he took a step out of his bed… and lost his balance, he did.

As he felt the world tilting when he started falling, a strong arm caught him in time, followed by a reprimand of, “Where the hell do you think you’re going?”

“Chasing you…” Eren’s voice died out, thinking such an answer would invite a series of rebukes from the man in front of him, so he continued, “I thought you left.”

Levi’s voice came sharply, “Did you think I would stand by the side of your bed like a nanny who would tend to your every need?” 

Eren had wanted to defend himself with a no when his eyes suddenly landed on the wooden chair held on the man’s other arm. His voice was slightly hoarse and strained, but he managed, “You’re… not leaving?”

“Twenty minutes.” Levi gently pushed Eren back to lie down on the bed with one arm, while he dragged the wooden chair to the bedside. He plopped himself down and put on his glasses, opening a book in front of him, as he muttered, “Twenty minutes is all I’m gonna give you. If you don’t sleep within that time frame, I’m leaving.”

Eren watched him silently, then smiled. “That’s plenty.”

“If that is so, then go to the fucking dreamland already.”

When shown with this kindness, Eren couldn’t help but want to exploit it. “But I can’t sleep.”

Levi arched an eyebrow, clearly irritated that this boy was pushing his patience. “What the fuck, do you want a bedtime story or something?”

Eren wanted to covet him.“That might help.”

“You wish.” Levi scoffed, barely sparing the boy a glance as he flipped open the next page. “Kicking you until you pass out is much preferable than reading you a bedtime story.”

Eren wanted to be the center of this man’s attention. “Then what if I tell you a bedtime story instead?”

With that, Levi finally let out an exasperated sigh. He frowned at Eren, grip tightening on the poor little book. “Are you seriously not going to sleep?”

“Didn’t you give me twenty minutes? Of course, I’ll sleep. Just let me tell you one story before I fall asleep, how about that?”

Levi almost wanted to smack the shit-eating grin on the boy’s face, but when he stared at the boy's paling complexion from his sickness, he eventually barked out a “Do whatever you want.”

Satisfied that he finally coaxed Levi to stay, Eren smiled and started, “Once upon a time, there was a young boy from a small district called Shiganshina.”

Notes:

Got some day-offs, so I'm trying to draft more chapters and update regularly :3 Anyways, that's how Eren found out about the korokke, now Levi is going to listen to the boy's past(?), perhaps~

Chapter 9: the devil of paradis’s story

“Shiganshina?” 

“Mhm. What is it?”

The man sitting on the wooden chair tilted his head slightly, pondering, “Just a weird name. Did you make this shit up?”

Eren laughed. “So what if I did? I thought you weren’t interested. Just listen, it’s barely even starting.”

So shut up Levi did.

“This village was set in a world where humanity lives inside giant walled cities to protect themselves from gigantic supernatural creatures called Titans, who devoured humans seemingly without reason. But it had been a century since people lived in the Walls safely, so they recognized it as peace within the land.”

Levi said nothing, so Eren continued.

“The boy lived in the outermost borders of the district, but he was content. He had doting parents, a warm house, his mother's homemade stew, and even two childhood friends he treasured. Basically, the boy had everything he could ever wanted.” Eren paused, his lashes fluttered as he lowered his gaze, his voice slightly shook. “But one day, the Walls fell from a Titan attack. The boy was small and weak, he couldn’t help his mother who got stuck at their ruined house. By the time he was forcibly taken into a shelter, he realized that he lost everything he had.”

Levi quirked an eyebrow. “Everything?”

“Everything. His mother was eaten by a Titan, his district an abandoned wreckage, and he could never get a taste of that homemade stew again. Therefore, he took it upon himself and joined the military to avenge his parents’ deaths and fight Titans, but strangely, he soon discovered he could transform into one himself. And that’s when he met his captain.”

When it got to this point, Eren lifted his gaze, expecting to be completely ignored by the man beside him. And yet, to his surprise… “His captain?” Levi asked with a full-on attention, arm resting at the backrest of the chair and his book already closed on his lap.

“Yeah, his captain was a person the boy had admired for a long, long time. After all, he was humanity's strongest soldier, so the boy was glad to be able to work right under his wing. Although the man could be a bit ill-tempered, but he was skillful in combat and very kind-hearted.”

Levi scoffed. “I don’t know, this captain sounds like a shady man.”

“Ha ha ha, why would you say that? He was truly, really kind.” Eren let out a hearty laugh. “His captain wasn't really talkative, but he’s a very observant man. Always the first one to notice when the boy would overexert himself in training sessions, as well as the first to ever care and reprimand him, because he had a big hope for the boy. To his captain, this boy was the hope of humanity, so more often than not, he saved the boy over and over again, despite the many sacrifices he had to make—be it the deaths of their fellow comrades, breaking his own legs or…”

“That’s absurd. How could a captain break his legs? Those are the assets he’d need to fight in a war,” said Levi with a scowl on his face. “Maybe he's kind, but he’s also fucking stupid.”

Seeing the man of that exact face insulting his other self in another life made Eren’s stomach hurt from laughing too much. He waved a hand and said, “Seriously, though. Let me finish first.”

“Your bedtime story is inherently bad and illogical. You should read more books so you can have a better taste at reading.”

“Bedtime stories aren’t meant to be logical, though.”

“Then shut up and go to bed rather than spouting this bullshit.”

“Fine, fine, I’ll read more books once I recover to get better.” Eren tried to compose himself again, though a grin still played on his lips when he saw the man grumbled under his breath. “Now, won’t you indulge me and let me finish this story first?”

When Levi eventually shut his mouth again, Eren continued, “Over time though, things eventually went downhill. His fellow comrades turned out to be people who could also transform into Titans—moreover, the ones who broke the Walls and killed his family. And as the truth unfolded, the boy found out that the enemies who broke the Walls were more than what met his eyes. Their enemies weren’t just those monstrous Titans, but other humans from outside the Walls.”

“Humans from outside the Walls?”

“Mn, as it turned out, humanity hasn't perished. Instead, the outside world was flourishing with advanced technology and weaponry, a wide range of knowledge, and centuries-long deep hatred for the boy’s island due to ancient wars. Unable to break the cycle of hatred that would bring hell upon the land he was born in, the boy earned a way to turn the tables in the war,” Eren paused. “Fueled with the terror of forever being oppressed, he sought to destroy the world to protect his own people.”

Levi blinked. “He destroyed the world?”

“Almost.” Eren smiled. “He almost did.”

“What happened?”

“He had used his power to awaken an army of hundreds of thousands Titans to trample over the earth, treading over more than half the human population outside the Walls.”

For some reason, Levi felt rather uneasy. He thought that whatever was to come next, the continuation wouldn’t be good.

“Although his goal was to protect his friends and end the cycle of hatred, the people he tried to protect opposed him to stop the genocide. At the end, the Titan powers disappeared as a result, and the world began to rebuild, even though conflict and tension undeniably remained.”

After a long pause, Levi asked, “So that’s it?”

“Hm?” Eren raised his brows. “Other than the lingering regrets in the boy’s final moments—yep, that’s it.”

Levi’s eyes widened in shock. “The boy died?”

“Presumably,” Eren answered, then shook his head and corrected, “no, he did die.”

Levi was flabbergasted at this huge ending that he had just missed. “How did he die?”

“Killed in the hands of his captain and his two childhood friends.”

Levi was as speechless as he could get, thinking: Eren was such a lousy storyteller.

As if he read the insults written all over Levi’s face, Eren grimaced, “His captain and childhood friends didn’t want it to come down to it, but they had no choice. They were the ones who put an end to the cycle of war by killing this spawn of the devil in front of the world. So, they became the world’s salvation, no?” Eren flipped to his side, a light smile still tugged on his lips. “The world eventually took side with these heroes, so all is well that ends well.”

“What about the boy’s regrets?”

“The boy’s regrets?” Eren stilled for a moment, then he forced a chuckle out of his lips. “Who gives a damn about the boy’s regrets?”

“I do, so tell me about it.”

From where Eren sat on the bed, Levi had unconsciously inched closer to him, though the man hadn’t noticed it himself. He watched how those grey eyes were earnest in his curiosity, and Eren didn’t have it in him to refuse such a genuine reaction, so he squeezed out, “He parted with everyone on bad terms. In their last conversation, the boy claimed to hate his childhood friends and even got into a big fight.”

“What about his parting with the captain?”

“What about it?” Eren laughed a bit as he recalled the last words he had roared out to the man inside that prison cell, feeling a tinge of guilt gnawing onto his conscience, so he only replied, “He said some hurtful words, each a stab to his captain’s heart. Thus, his captain who always reprimanded and kept him in check… eventually gave up on him.”

Levi stayed silent for a while before commenting, “You’re so bad at story-telling. Don’t tell stories to anyone else anymore.”

At this, Eren laughed and held his hands up in the air, a sign of surrender. “You have my word, you’ll be the only one I tell this story to.”

Wind blew in from the gaps of the window, curtains billowing within its wake. The two figures within the infirmary sat in silence, their thoughts remained their own, hidden behind the unreadable gaze of each grey and green eyes.

After a while, Eren was the one to break the silence: “Levi.”

“Call me ‘sir’ when we’re in school.”

“Levi.”

The said man glared at him. “What?”

“Say, if you were in the captain’s position, would you have…” 

Would you have given up on me as well?  

But for some reason, the words were stuck in his throat. Eren neither had the courage to continue the question nor did he want to know the answer anymore. The thought was far too terrifying for him to bear, so he shrugged and opted to take the last korokke from the plastic bag. He chewed down and mumbled with a stuffed mouth, “Never mind. It’s such a stupid story anyway.”

Perhaps the meds were starting to take action, Eren grew sleepy as soon as he laid back down on the bed. He had wanted to stay awake for a few moments longer, having only a few minutes left from the twenty-minute time frame Levi graced him, but he didn’t want the man to leave. He sneakily tugged into the fabric of Levi’s blazer without the man noticing, considering how he could coax Levi to stay. But try as he might, his heavy-lidded eyes eventually closed and he passed out sleeping without having uttered anything else. 

Levi glanced over at his watch, then at the boy in front of him. 

It was a given that Levi hadn’t heard the boy’s full question, but after pondering for a while, he suddenly said, “If I were his captain, I would’ve beaten the boy’s ass and knocked some sense into him. Maybe break some of his limbs so he wouldn’t up and run over half the population on earth.”

Of course, no one chimed in to answer his ramblings. But it only encouraged Levi to continue, appearing to think over his answer seriously as he chewed down at his lower lip in contemplation.

“For all I know, his captain must’ve also had some lingering regrets too, you know. To think that the boy he claimed to be the hope of humanity became the one who sought to destroy it instead… Had he not given up on the boy during their last moment, maybe he could’ve changed something.”

Silence fell, then an exasperated sigh slipped from his thin lips. Levi thought he must’ve lost his mind, for thinking seriously over a fictional story that Eren made up—a terrible, illogical one at that. Finding that the boy had fallen into another deep slumber, he propped his arms onto the side of the bed and leaned closer to take a better look at the boy’s peaceful face. 

It was then that he noticed the fingers that had tugged onto his sleeves, unwilling to let go even when sleep had invaded his consciousness. Levi’s lips curved into a gentle smile, he lifted his hand to brush away the stray strands of brunette hair overlapping the boy’s dark lashes, and whispered ever so softly, “I won’t leave you.”

By the time the sun slowly made its descent closer to the horizon, the two figures within the infirmary remained as still as the passage of time.

Notes:

When I wrote the tags 'slow burn' and 'mutual pining', I truly mean it... so, if you choose to stay, thank you and please bear with me. c:

Chapter 10: the devil of paradis’s past

Levi remembered the first time Eren came up to his door. 

A new family had just moved to the house next door, a married couple roughly around their thirties and their little boy who was still in grade school.

That day was another summer day, bright sun scorching against the tree-lined pathway when Levi opened his door after a few knocks. The woman standing outside had hazel eyes, round and bright as she put on a beautiful smile when she greeted, “Hello, I'm Carla from the Yeager family who just moved next door. Pleased to meet you.”

“Levi,” said the man, his expression remained as still as ever. “My pleasure, as well.”

Though the man's impassive tone didn't discourage the woman's joyful nature. Instead, she pulled the boy who had been hiding behind her legs to stand between the two of them. She nudged gently, “Here is our boy. Eren, greet your neighbor.”

A pair of grey eyes drifted down to the boy whose height only reached his waist, his hair a mess of brunette strands and his clothes were unkempt with traces of dirt at the hems of his sleeves. Though wen his gaze stopped at the boy's face, he immediately lifted an eyebrow as he eyed the mother standing before him. “He's the exact copy of you,” Levi said with a hint of pleasant surprise in his tone. 

Carla let out a hearty laughter. “We hear that a lot.”

Levi had always had a soft spot for sons who took after their mother's features—a reminder of himself and his late mother. So he kneeled to level down to the boy, and pulled on a light smile, “Eren, was it? I'm Levi. Let's get along, shall we?”

The summer sun hung high in the sky, striking everything in its presence with a heatwave, its light so blinding it would force you to squint. But when Levi stared into those emerald eyes, it was as if the sunshine paled against the brilliant glimmer in those bejeweled eyes. 

It somewhat reminded him of an exquisite gemstone of a necklace he had seen at an antique shop abroad when he visited Kenny a few years ago. 

The boy's skin was like a canvas spilled with honey, bronzed like the dusk of a summer day, supple and glowing when sunlight kissed the tips of his ears. A hint of red flushed from where the light had touched him, spread across the plump cheeks of his face, appearing stark against the lashes curtaining those mesmerizing eyes.

The boy hesitated for a bit, fingers fiddling at the hems of his t-shirt, before he finally said, “Nice to meet you… Levi.”

A few days after his neighbor settled in, Levi noticed that the boy liked to spend his time under the giant tree in front of the house. Rain or shine, sometimes he'd nap against the trunk, or climb the thick branches, or read a picture book underneath the shades of green. Whenever Levi would pass by him, the boy would greet him brightly with a See you, Levi in the morning, or a Welcome home, Levi in the evening. 

One day, the rain was pouring relentlessly when Levi got home from a family member’s funeral. Parking his car at the side of the pathway, he opened his umbrella as he reached the other door and walked his late aunt's daughter to his own house. 

Just when he stepped onto his foyer, he caught sight of Eren from the corner of his eyes. The boy was crouching near the giant tree, thus hidden by the big tree bark. His small body was wrapped entirely in a bright green raincoat, while he stared intently at the soil. 

At this sight, Levi raised a questioning eyebrow. He told Mikasa to wait for him at the porch, while he hurried to the giant tree, calling: “Eren.”

“Levi?!” Eren jumped at the sudden voice coming from behind him. He stood up and turned so quickly that he almost tripped on his own shoelaces, immediately holding onto the trunk behind him for balance. Eren's face flushed red over his own clumsiness. “Welcome home!”

Levi frowned, tipping his umbrella over to Eren's side. “Where are your parents?”

“Dad's still at work, and mom has an appointment.”

“What are you doing out here alone, then?”

“Ah.” Eren scratched his head, a bashful smile playing on his lips. “I was playing at Jean's and forgot to bring my keys. So I was just waiting for mom or dad to come home.”

“You should've taken shelter on the porch.” 

“But then, the flower might drown and die in the downpour.”

“The flower?”

Eren tugged at the hems of his brown shirt, embarrassed, but finally stepped aside to let Levi take a good look at behind him. There really was a sprouting purple flower. “I planted it a few days ago. It's a bellflower.”

“I can see that, but why plant it out here? You know it'll surely drown and die in this rainy season.”

Eren looked down, eyes hidden beneath the flutter of his lashes, muttering softly, “I thought the tree would feel lonely, so…”

Eren had trailed off, but Levi undoubtedly caught on his intentions. Quite stunned at such a naive, pure heart, Levi couldn't help but let the corners of his lips tug into a small smile. After a moment's worth of staring in half awe, and half dumbstruck, Levi shrugged off his black blazer. He threw the fabric over the boy's head, and kneeled down. Dampened soil immediately seeped to the ends of his fitted pants, pitter-patter rain splashed to the expensive leather shoes, all dirt and mud that usually would've made the man scrunch his nose in disgust suddenly faded to insignificance. 

Levi dug a small hole beside the flower with his bare hands, dirt clumped in to his fingernails, then buried the handle of his umbrella underneath the soil. 

“Levi, you're drenched!” Eren yelped, standing on his tiptoes as he held up the blazer over Levi and himself, short arms straining to cover the two of them from the thunderous rain. 

Despite himself, Levi gazed back at the boy with tenderness in his eyes, thinking of how this boy was such a gentle soul, kindhearted by nature, and how he wanted to help preserve it. From behind the hems of his blazer held over his head, Levi's eyes caught sight of the little girl he had brought home. An orphaned girl who could use some of the warmth overflowing from this carefree boy. A childhood friend for each other could be a good start. So Levi said, “Eren, there's someone I want you to meet.”

Thus, he brought Eren to meet Mikasa and let the boy stay over until the rain stopped. Eren hadn't eaten dinner, and Levi just got home from a funeral. He contemplated the leftover ingredients he had in the kitchen as he washed his hands a few times over—almost compulsively—before shortly whipping up a small crispy snack for the two kids chattering on his coffee table. 

Levi let the freshly fried croquette to cool off on the dining table, skipping over the stairs to take out the smallest shirt he had, before coming back down with a light yell. “Eren, Mikasa. Come eat something.” Though he had initiated it, Levi was still pleasantly surprised when the two kids strutted into the kitchen. It appeared that Eren's bright personality was truly contagious, seeing how Mikasa's tears had stopped rolling from the corners of her red-rimmed eyes. He handed the neatly-folded shirt to Eren, saying, “Change first then you can eat.”

Eren hummed, took the set of pajamas Levi had lent him, and made his way to the bathroom. 

“What do you think of him?”

“He’s a nice kid,” said Mikasa, keeping her gaze lowered. “A bit too chatty.”

Levi only smiled softly at her response. “Since you'll be staying with me from now on, you might as well get along with him. I haven't furnished your room, so you can stay in mine. I'll sleep on the couch.”

Mikasa lifted her gaze, grey eyes finding another pair of the same color, and nodded her answer.

As Levi went to make his own pot of tea, the bathroom door opened with a click. Eren walked back to sit on the dining table, dragging the trails of pajamas that were still too big on him. The ends of the pants fell all the way down to the floor, and the hem of his long sleeves was still too loose despite having been folded a few times over. 

“Eat before it gets cold.”

Eren, as obedient as ever, took the croquette at the top of the pile. He brought it to his lips and bit onto the crunchy skin, humming contentedly when the warm mashed potatoes melted on his tongue. A sweet aftertaste lingered and before he swallowed the ones bulging in his cheeks, he already up and grabbed another one. “Levi, what is this?”

Levi was a small distance away as he brewed his tea in the pantry. “What?”

“What is this?” Eren mumbled his question once more, proceeded to munch on his second piece. “It's so tasty!”

Levi felt his ears flushed. He had never cooked for anyone, so such praise was making him bashful. “It's just a croquette.”

But Eren didn't hear it very clearlt, what with him stuffing his mouth full, he mumbled again, “A korokke?”

Levi looked over his shoulder at the boy, bright eyes shining under the fluorescent light of his kitchen, cheeks filled with food that made him look like a small, greedy hamster. He cleared his throat, “Don't talk with your mouth full.”

When Eren's parents came to pick him up that night, he asked if Levi would let him have another taste of the korokke to which Levi sternly replied with a “No.”

The next few days, Eren came down with a fever. 

Thinking Eren learned his lesson and wouldn't stay out in the rain anymore, imagine the surprise he had when Levi caught the boy a couple more times stuck outside his own house, rain or shine. His reasons had gotten a lot more creative too, such as: My mom accidentally brought my keys, or I fought with my dad and mom, or Jean surprisingly wasn't at home when I visited, or I was bored. Levi was rather dumbfounded... what was he, a fucking daycare babysitting his neighbor's brat? 

But every time the boy would stay out, and every time Levi would let him into his own house. 

As time went by, Eren had started to openly knock on his doors without making up excuses, comfortable enough to plop his ass on the soft couch of Levi's living room and turn on the TV. Once too many times, he’d bring up how much he wanted to eat the korokke again, but Levi only said, “Go buy it in the damn store.”

“The store’s korokke doesn’t taste as good as the one you made.”

For Levi, trivial acts of kindness were somewhat embarrassing to admit. So he thickened his skin to lie. “I was only reheating the store’s korokke, though.”

Eren was dumbfounded. “Huh? But didn't you…”

“If you think it tasted different, then you must get your taste buds checked.”

Eren tsk-ed in defeat. Knowing Levi’s stubbornness, he had no choice but to let it go. 

Though he did still complain about it day and night to Mikasa, and once the girl had gotten an earful, she finally came up to Levi and told him, “Just cook the damn korokkes and tell him it’s from me to save your face. I can’t stand his complaints about this anymore.”

And the rest was history. 

The heatwave was a degree hotter today. Despite the full swing from the air conditioner, Levi felt the back of his collared shirt thoroughly drenched with sweat, sticky and wet that bothered him to no end. Just as he was uncomfortable, the students in his classroom also fanned themselves, eyes apparently dazed from the heat.

Curiosity struck Levi. He had been rather worried about how Eren occasionally collapsed, especially when the sun would shine bright and hot, that it’d cloud one’s mind with haze.

When he gingerly tried to peer over, ever so slightly so it’d come as natural as it got, his grey eyes wandered to the student sitting at the front desk next to the window… only to find that the emerald pair was already looking back at him.

Levi suddenly felt like he was a cat being doused in water, caught in an improper action of trying to peek at his student. He cooled his gaze, then tried to save himself some face. “Eren.”

“Yes, sir?”

“You know the answer to this question?”

Eren was a diligent student, and had always been, even during his three-years military training. Sat on the front row, back straight and attention fully on the lecture. Answering a question was absolutely an easy feat. Thus, when his answer was correct, he was self-satisfied at the slight nod from his dear teacher.

“Yes, you’re correct.” Levi’s eyes were glinting, somewhat annoyed that he couldn’t pick on this boy when he’s obviously paying such close attention to the class, but at the same time… a tint of red flushed his ears. It felt to him that Eren was paying too much attention. “Then, we’ll have a surprise quiz today. Fifteen minutes. Any later than that and I’m not accepting your papers.

The class broke into a muffled noise of complaints and sighs, but no one would dare to go against the tyrannical teacher, wouldn't they?

“Eren,” he called. “Come help me distribute this.”

And so the boy did obediently, walked to the teacher’s desk and received the stack of papers from Levi. Maybe Eren was overthinking it, but when his hands brushed with Levi’s, he could feel the warmth radiating from those usually cold hands. Such subtle and innocent touch, yet it sent shivers down Eren’s spine when he gazed at those grey orbs.

Both of their hands stilled a second longer than they should’ve, greedy to have the touch of each other lingered even just for a moment more, and it’s only thanks to the commotion behind them that no one had noticed anything amiss when Levi was the first to pull away.

Eren quickly distributed the quiz papers without further ado and returned to his own seat.

Fifteen minutes was absolutely plenty. As much as Levi was tyrannical, he wasn't one to be unreasonable. The quiz wasn't even hard to begin with and, after ten minutes, the class was almost empty as the bell concluding the last period rang. 

Almost empty, except for one person. 

“Eren,” Levi had been walking the aisles of desk throughout the quiz, and only now did he finally come over to the furthermost right aisle. “Are you having trouble with the questions?”

“You gave us fifteen minutes. I'm just using my time as much as I can.”

When Levi peeked at the answer sheet, he frowned. “You've answered all the damn questions. Give me your paper.”

“But I still have five more minutes.”

Levi’s hand was already stretched out to grab at the piece of paper. “Brat, are you trying to make me work overtime on purpose?”

“And what if I am?”

“Fuck off, I want to go home on time today.”

“Then, should we head home together?”

At this, Levi could feel heat creeping up to his face. It was only thanks to his stubbornness that he still held his gaze at those emerald jewels that seemed to drag him down into a bottomless pit in every passing second. 

This is bad, he knew. He had to grab the quiz paper by force and run away from this pressure before he lost it. 

He really should… 

“Levi.”

“Didn't I tell you to—”

“Mind to accompany me for a bit? I feel a little dizzy.”

The man eventually shut up, just as Eren had expected. Though Eren would feel faint a couple times ever since the day at the infirmary, it didn't really happen that much. It'd only act up when he spiraled down the paths of his past lifetime, which memories he had repressed to the back of his mind by filling it with things that matter most. 

And what would matter more to him than fixing his relationship with Levi in this lifetime? 

Eren didn't want to have any regrets, he didn't want to see that sharp glare lowered and avoided his gaze as he turned his back from Eren. No reprimands, no kicks and punches, but just Levi turning away and giving up on him. To be frank, Eren would rather have Levi hate him for his shamelessness and impudence, rather than having to watch his back fading away as the one in his memories. 

When Eren noticed that Levi would be extremely gentler whenever Eren talked about his faintness, how could Eren not exploit that reason? 

“Do you need to go to the infirmary?”

“No, I'll head home in a bit anyway.” Eren plopped his head on his arms, pinning his quiz sheet under his weight as he feared Levi would snatch them away and leave. “Just sit here with me for five more minutes?”

Staying silent, he finally sat right on top of the desk, which caused Eren's breath caught at the sudden close proximity.

To Levi, it's nothing more than the fact that he couldn't be bothered to drag a chair to the frontmost desk, so he just did whatever he saw fit. This way, he’d be able to assert dominance if Eren ever got mischievous, while watching the classroom door with alarm. When one was so used to being seen as fierce and hot-headed, they would deem their act of gentleness as a sign of vulnerability. So how was Levi supposed to save his skin were someone to come in through the door and see how he was indulging Eren’s request? He should always be ready to shove himself away from Eren and build up a wall of excuses.

But to Eren? Right in front of his eyes were the well-toned muscles of Levi's thighs and ass, wrapped in the fabric of his pants that pulled tightly when he sat. His gaze trailed up the curve of his back, white shirt slightly drenched with sweat that was still tucked neatly into his pants.

Eren knew he should stop staring… he really should, when he felt that part of his lower body twitched. 

But then he looked at the hard biceps leading to the toned forearms, unusually revealed beneath the folded long-sleeves. Muscles on Levi's arms flexed as they held onto the edge of Eren's desk, his body slightly leaning backward, as he put one leg across the other. 

Ah, how nice would it be if Eren could just grab that arm and do whatever he wanted with it. 

Eren felt his face getting hot, he might really get dizzy and faint. If Levi were to lower his gaze at Eren, then he would undoubtedly catch the blatant lustful gaze in those emerald eyes he usually adored. So the best resort Eren could come up with was to close his eyes, half in hiding away his desires, while the other half was to hide the pure pain of holding back the arousal pulsing with heat in his own fucking pants.

Levi had been gazing at the door and windows in alarm. But when he peeked at the boy already closing his eyes, he couldn't help but nudged. “Don't sleep here. I'm not carrying you home.”

Eren mumbled am not asleep under his breath, thinking it'd be easier for him to feign sleepiness until his hard on came down. But Levi nudged him once more, harder than before, so Eren had no choice but to open his bleary eyes. 

Levi's arms moved, and Eren thought his five minutes were up. 

Only when Eren was about to coax the man to stay a minute longer, his lips opened to call Levi, when the said man's hand suddenly reached across his desk. Slender fingers took a pink hairpin and, after a moment's hesitation, clipped it to Eren's stray strands of hair. 

“Your hair's gotten a lot longer.”

“Oh.” Eren twisted the tips of his curtain bangs with his fingertips, fiddling around and jokingly asked, “You don't like it cause it looks messy, huh? Should I get a haircut?”

“Who said anything about not liking it?”

Eren could almost swear his heart had skipped a beat. “What?”

From the deepest of Levi's heart, he incredibly loved Eren's hair—just like how he loved every single part of this boy—already growing longer by the day. 

How he wanted to run his fingers through the soft, brunette locks. How he wanted to pat the boy's head and ruffle the soft hair with mischief.

How he wanted to grab a fistful of hair as he told Eren to be a good boy and get down on his knees. How he wanted to tie up those brunette strands into a high bun and pepper the slender neck hidden beneath with red and purple love bites. How he wanted to pull at Eren's soft hair as the boy writhed under his relentless thrusts. 

If Eren’s possessiveness made him want to covet and hide away his captain from the lustful gaze of others, Levi’s obsession made him want to take this boy in the palm of his hand, to mold and bend and mark him to his heart’s content, and finally show his masterpiece off for the whole wide world to see who Eren truly belonged to.

What a hideous, absolutely filthy person Levi was.

Levi’s face remained impassive despite the raging desires within him when he saw the boy's cheeks flushed red. Anyone with eyes would be able to see how the boy was abashed at Levi’s simple gesture, but Levi had denied his feelings for so long. Eren couldn’t possibly blush because of him, so he chewed down at himself and thought: It must be because of the sunset.

Well, it was not because of the sunset. 

But if Levi didn't deny himself of his own desires that appeared to line up with the boy's, then he was afraid he might gobble and eat this boy up, bit by bit so painfully slow as he savor the taste until the boy begged for his mercy, like a bear finishing off its prey by each layer. Fucking Hell, he wouldn’t give a single flying fuck if anyone were to walk in on him taking this boy greedily.

Right here, right now.

Levi moved his hand once more, picking up another pink hairpin to clip the other side of Eren's bangs. He commented in a cool voice, “It does start to get in the way, though. So use your hairpins and hair ties properly…”

Levi thought, because I want to see your emerald eyes that I love so much… all the time. But Levi’s face remained still, voice steady and stern, as he said, “...because it'll get in your eyes.”

Notes:

Updates will be quite irregular from this chapter onwards because my rl schedule is getting busier and it's honestly fucking me over. Stay healthy, everyone.

Chapter 11: the devil of paradis felt something hard?

Notes:

Please kindly heed the Author's note at the end of this story. It's very important. Thank you.

From that day onwards, Eren had taken a liking to stay behind after Levi's classes, somewhat excited every time the man would indulge him in this ‘secret rendezvous’. Eren had noticed that the stolen glances amidst class—that Levi thought was subtle—happened even more often, such as the tender brushes of their fingertips when Levi handed over test papers and books to Eren. 

Over time, Eren noticed how Levi's cool and stern voice would always carry a degree of warmth when he spoke to Eren.

Therefore, the school started to welcome an unprecedented spectacle. The ill-tempered, handsome biology teacher whose presence alone would always make his surroundings go quiet and keep their distances, now had taken on an additional company. Who else could it be other than Eren Yeager?

It appeared that, even though this student had experienced all kinds of detentions and received countless reprimands, he was more happy than not to always tail behind this grumpy teacher. 

Before Levi knew it, Eren had clung to him like a fucking lifeline. It felt like the days when that young neighbor kid came knocking at his door with various reasons like “My mother brought my keys,” or “I got locked out because my parents fought,” had finally made a comeback. 

Once Eren found an opening to earn the man's tender affection, he wasn't the type to easily let go. And so, no matter how much Levi tried to shrug him off his shoulders, Eren would always find new ways to snatch his legs or grab his arm to cling back to Levi. 

Today was a day such as that. 

“Sir, when will I get to eat your korokke again?”

A kick to Eren's shin eventually shut him up. The boy grimaced in pain, but the smile on his lips didn't falter. Instead he only got brighter as he kept up with the quickened pace of the latter, what with his legs being a bit longer. 

“Sir, you should slow down, you're practically running in the hallway right now.” Eren spoke, his distance had gotten a lot shorter from Levi who was—as Eren said—basically skipping through the hallway. The boy didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “Sir, weren’t you the one who scolded me before that running here is not allowed by the school rules?”

But it only pressed Levi to walk even faster. “Leave me alone.”

“I’m carrying the permit for our class's school festival project, though. We need your signature.”

“Why are you the one asking me for it and not the class president?”

Eren chuckled. “Jean is too scared of you, he almost threw up when he thought of how he had to submit it to you after a day’s delay. As his vice, I might as well help him out.”

Levi cussed under his breath, something along the line of that-shitty-Kirstein-brat before asking, “Then you can just put it on my desk, what are you following me around for?”

Eren smiled cheekily. “Because I want to talk to you?”

“Ridiculous,” said Levi, deadpan. “Get your shitty ass away from me.”

The scene of the infamous stern teacher being chased around by his sunshine of a student truly made an amusing sight. As this had gone by for a couple weeks, many students watched on with interest. “Look at Eren, is he seriously not afraid of getting his ass kicked?”

“I heard Mr. Ackerman had him scrub the bathrooms on all floors of this building until they shine and sparkle as a punishment last time.”

“Really? Last time I heard he had to clean the swimming pool in our school's gym alone! He even stayed until nighttime.”

“Yeah, I knew about that one. And Mr. Ackerman even gave him an assignment due at five in the next morning.”

“Woah, that’s practically hell. How has he not learned his lesson yet?”

“Sounds like a lunatic to me. Is he trying to get punished by mopping the floor in all three entire buildings next time?”

“Beats me. Who knows what that suicidal maniac was thinking?”

A group of students in the hallway whispered amongst themselves in a low voice, tacitly making way for the two figures in their topic of conversation to pass through, completely oblivious of the eyes pricking at them from all directions, as if they’re lost in their own world.

Maybe Eren truly was lost in his own world. “Sir, please slow down.” Eren said, which once more, fell on deaf ears. Unhappy with being ignored by Levi any further, he shuffled the stack of books to one hand while the other reached out to tug on the man’s blazer. “Levi.”

This time was a smack to the boy’s hand, but Eren was too preoccupied with balancing the books in his hand to be able to avoid it in time. Thus, he accepted the hit and pulled back his hand with gritted teeth as Levi stormed, “I told you to call me ‘sir’ at school.”

Being stubborn against this headstrong man was futile. So Eren slowed his pace, wondering if he should give up his pursue for today, so he took a step backward and…

"Ah!"

Two figures fell with a thud. 

Levi had initially wanted to turn around and scold the boy once they reached an empty hallway, but he hadn't expected that Eren would trip over his own shoelace. Thus, in a split second, Levi found that he had become a cushion to Eren's fall. 

Levi grunted, his hands trembled slightly as he whipped his head towards the boy on top of him, brows furrowed deep as he looked for signs of delirium on the boy's face. 

But unlike his expectations, Eren didn’t appear faint in the slightest. 

Instead he looked even more energetic after his initial surprise, the fire in his eyes burned brighter and his smile only turned gentler. Eren's breath was steady, blowing gently against the long brunette strands that fell off from his hair clips upon the impact, its ends caressing at Levi's cheeks. It made Levi's face itchy, just like how the boy's presence made his heart itch. 

The boy was so stunningly beautiful in such a close distance that he had Levi frozen where he fell.

When Levi didn't scold nor push him away, Eren found it bizarre. He said, “Sorry, sir. I was so clumsy that I tripped over my own feet. Did it hurt?”

Levi was still silent as he looked up at the boy. Well, of course it fucking hurted! But like hell would the school's tyrant admit that to his student.

When he saw Eren's guilty expression, Levi reached out to poke the boy's forehead with his index finger. “Just get up first.”

By that time, Eren finally realized the position he was in. His legs straddled the man's hips, arms on both sides of Levi's head straining to hold his weight off the floor, but he had trapped Levi's body underneath him in the process. 

How improper! 

Eren flew into a panic and pushed himself to his own feet. However, he had moved too suddenly and the muscles on his legs were struck with cramps. So Eren couldn't help but lose his balance as he fell right on top of Levi again. 

When he plopped right back on top of the man's hips, a pained grunt ripped through the usually impassive man beneath him. Worried he had pushed the man's buttons too much, Eren scrambled to sit upright and began waving his hands, flustered. “Sir, I'm sorry! But my legs are really cramped right now. I’m not messing around with you, I just… really can't move a muscle.”

“Did I say anything? Shut your trap and stop moving.” Levi's face was undoubtedly pained as much as his voice was strained, that Eren helplessly wondered if he really weighed that much… but it's not like he was crushing him to death. Levi ran his fingers through his hair in frustration, brows tightly taut. “Can you shift away and get off me, at least?”

Oh good lord, Levi looked so fucking hot when he's suffering like this.

Once again, Eren tried to shift away. But his knees bucked, and his legs wobbled. Alas, it was a sorry sight of Eren trying to wiggle away from where he had fallen, so uncomfortably directly on Levi's hips. 

A strong pair of hands gripped Eren's waist, rendering him completely still right where he sat. Levi rasped, “I said, stop moving."

Eren thought nothing untoward had happened at first. After all, it was Levi that we're talking about. Eren probably had done it—annoyed Levi a little too much—and even the boy had to admit that this position they were in… was rather awkward. 

That was all, surely? 

“But you told me to shift away and get off you…”

Well I told you to get off me, not get me off. Levi strained the last reserves of his strength to grip the boy's waist even tighter when he felt the boy trying to shift again. 

One wrong move from the boy, and Levi would be dead. 

Levi would rather kill himself than face the disgraceful reality he had to live in if Eren ever found out what was going on Levi's lower body. What kind of face would Eren make when he noticed? Probably a glare or terror as he gaped in disgust. 

Oh, Levi would rather die. 

“I’m trying to get off you, stop gripping so hard. My waist is getting sore…” And as soon as Eren moved again, he became aware of something massive and firm prodding at his ass, right beneath him. 

Huh? 

“What the…” 

What the fuck? 

Eren didn't know what happened to the cramps on his legs that instantly disappeared at that moment. He immediately sprung up to his feet, face changing colors from shocked, pale white to a bright, flushing red. His hands trembled on both sides of his body, palms turning clammy as he clenched and stretched his fingers repeatedly. His lips quivered, opening and closing in hesitation, but not a single word was uttered. 

At this moment of time, the Devil of Paradis was absolutely, completely, genuinely shocked to his core.

Even Levi didn't have the balls to gaze into the boy's eyes… but he had to. 

So when Levi looked up and saw how those bright eyes were completely terrified, he could feel the stinging pain in his chest. As if a knife had embedded itself in his heart and carved it into small pieces of flesh, impossible to put together anymore, as fresh blood dripped down his stiff body still frozen on the floor.

“Sir, I… I’m sorry…” Eren was the first to break the silence, but his voice was merely a whisper. “I didn’t mean to…”

Levi pushed himself off the floor, subtly buttoning up the oversized blazer over his own body to cover the visible hard on straining in his pants. “Calm down, Eren.” 

Eren did not like that tone. “Sir, it’s my fault. I’m sorry I wasn’t…”

“Your fault?” Levi eyed Eren with an unfathomable expression. His face remained impassive as ever despite the thousands of cuts carved into his own heart, fresh blood trickling down from the wound of feelings that he had repressed for years, but his voice remained clear and sharp. “You think I would get hard for a brat who’s still wet-behind-the-ears like you?”

Eren was flabbergasted. “What?”

“Don’t get me wrong. It’s a completely normal reaction when you shuffled so much on my fucking hips, that’s why I told you to stop moving.” Levi paused. “It'd still happen even if someone else accidentally fell on top of me.”

Levi had said the words to save his face, but he knew damn well nobody would ever be brave enough to stand less than an arm's length away from him, moreover to sit directly on top of him. Nobody, unless it was Eren fucking Yeager. 

A helpless sigh escaped Levi's lips. “Also, you ought to stop fooling around too much, Eren.”

“I wasn’t fooling…”

“What’s the point of the detentions I’ve given you if you don't even try to work on your discipline? I know I've been too soft on you because we're neighbors, but you need to learn your boundaries when we're at school.” Levi scolded, pressed his lips together as the scowl deepened on his face. If the only way to save the last bit of his dignity was by acting like a shameless villain unwilling to admit his sins, then so be it. So Levi rasped, “Forget it… I don't even have the energy to reprimand you anymore now. You are too far gone, truly beyond saving.”

The words, once again, struck Eren like a dagger. He could almost see himself back inside the darkness of that dungeon prison cell. Those words that Levi had left him in their last parting as he left Eren without lifting his gaze back up even once. 

Those were his last words to Eren. 

Eren flew into another meltdown of panic. He wanted to reach out to the person before him and hold him back from leaving. Eren would turn back the time if that'd make Levi feel better. He'd grovel to his knees and ask forgiveness for whatever pissed him off this time if that meant Levi would stay.

But the shock from hearing those words again still had him dumbstruck, nailed to where he was standing without being able to move an inch. It may be even greater than the shock he got from whatever just transpired between the two of them earlier. 

In the end, Eren could only freeze in place as Levi lowered his gaze and didn’t spare him as much as a single glance. Not through the entire time he took the paper of permit from Eren's hands, turned his back, and left as his resounding footsteps faded away.

The school hallway returned to its presumed silence.

Notes:

Sorry about that. I wanted to make this a cute one, but I felt like I needed to spice it up a bit. :)

This time the author's note is a little different and longer, so I’d greatly appreciate your help if you can spare a few moments to help spread awareness. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Yes, I am even using this platform to ask for help.

Currently, the people of Indonesia (my country) are resisting a fascist government over labor rights and harmful policies that are costing citizens’ lives. Police are brutally injuring protesters and citizens, culminating when they ran over a citizen (who didn’t even participate in the protest) to death. They are also attacking medical teams and arresting journalists. To make matters worse, police are now allowed to open fire and use snipers to kill citizens.

Widespread communication blackouts and blockades are being enforced to suppress information and control the narrative. The situation remains extremely chaotic and severe to this very second I write and upload this.

Attack on Titan is a story based on politics at its core and references to fascism, and since I assume readers here are aware of the dangers of this situation, I'm asking for international assistance in spreading the word.

I hope I can continue writing, updating, and having fun here with everyone. However, even enjoying a trivial hobby like this is a privilege in my current situation. I can only upload my drafts when I have time for now (and while I'm still alive), since it would be a shame to let them rot in my folder. If the situation improves and stabilizes soon, I hope we can have fun again and read this story to the end. Stay healthy and safe, everyone.

Chapter 12: the devil of paradis’s flowers

The Devil of Paradis had already lost his captain’s faith once in the past life, but Eren wouldn't let a second one happen in this lifetime. 

Those words that felt like a stab into his heart, boiled his insides and left Eren unable to sleep for the next couple of days. What's worse was the fact that whenever the sun shone bright, turning his dizzy head into a churning mess, he would see flashes of memories behind his eyelids. It took him awhile to realize the memories of his past life as well as this one was beginning to collide.

How he wished Levi were here to distract him, to banter with him and take his mind off his conscience. And yet, Levi had gone on another business trip for a couple of days. 

Today had to be the day Levi was supposed to return, so Eren anticipated meeting him by the first period. 

“Your biology teacher couldn't be present today because he had to be the representative to the City Hall, so I'll be here to substitute him.” Hange beamed, inviting shouts of joy and giddy jumps from the rest of the class, except for the boy sitting at the front seat by the window. 

Eren's heart sank, as though a massive weight was pressing down on it. Could it be true… was Levi actually leaving him?

Those words he said last time they met… were the exact words Levi had said in their previous life, back when Levi had decided to give up on him for good. Why did he say that now, when everything was going just fine?

If he was so embarrassed about that ‘incident’ due to his thin face, then Eren would be the very person to give him the benefit of the doubt. 

After all, Eren already had countless intentional arousals towards that man… What would an accidental one from Levi even matter to him? He wanted to ask Levi to forget it, wanted to get down on his knees and kowtow, wanted to beg for Levi to please just don't leave me, can’t we start over?

Eren would rather die than having to live a life where his Levi turned his back towards him. But how many lifetimes would fate ever spare him? Having experienced rebirth in this world was already an abundant grace for the Devil of Paradis. For someone who was fated to massacre eighty percent of humanity on this earth, he expected he would be thrown into the deepest pit of hell due to his unforgivable sins, so his soul would never reincarnate.

Yet Eren was reborn. And not only that, now he had a life of warmth here where he could freely choose to show his love and care to his beloveds… and to his Levi.

Eren wouldn’t want to lose all of these, for the life of him. This boy who wore his heart on his sleeve, thought he had lost the ability to express himself in the past after he obtained the Founder's power and was thrown into the hurling mess of time. But maybe having been rebirthed into the body of his sixteen-years old self also turned his mentality a bit more childish. 

And it sure wasn't easy for Hange to ignore the constant taps of the boy's foot against the floor, tick tack tick of his pen against the still-empty notebook, his stolen glances of worry every now and then towards the door. 

Hange had heard about Eren a lot from Levi. How this boy was extraordinary, very attentive to the class, and—though the man was reluctant to admit it—Eren had to be Levi's student he took the most pride in his class. 

But the distraught on the boy's face was so apparent. Like a book opened wide till it broke its bindings just for everyone to see. His layers of emotions changed like peeling off each ply of tissue slowly. Hange found it intriguing… and mind-boggling. When they finished the class, they stopped Eren who was almost the first one to bolt out of the class. 

“Eren, where are you heading?”

It went without saying, Eren's mind was a complete mess. The only thing on his mind was to find Levi, but when he almost blurted out the words ‘biology lab’, he stopped himself. 

Wouldn't it be too obvious if he said that? Would Hange—in all their quick wit and attention to details—caught wind of Eren's impure intentions towards Levi? If so, wouldn't Levi's reputation be in shambles? 

Hange initially hadn't caught wind. But seeing the boy's hesitation, the gears in their head started working. So they ventured to say, “Levi didn't come to school today, but he asked me to tell you something.”

The light in those emerald eyes was instant. 

“He requested me to sort these out and give them to him.”

“I'll help.”

Hange handed over the stack of papers to Eren and ruffled his head. “If you insist. Thank you, Eren.”

“When am I supposed to submit them to Mr. Ackerman?”

Of course, when Levi went in for work again. But Hange felt mischief stirring in their heart and said ambiguously, “I heard you're next door neighbors with Levi, no?”

In the end, that's how Eren found himself standing before that familiar white front door. The boy had made a resolve that he would brace himself, knock on the door, and get Levi to talk to him, no matter what, even if he had to use some sort of force. He was not having Levi walk out from his life that easily, not this time. 

But apparently it was easier thought than done… because why was Eren still frozen in front of that damn door even though ten minutes had passed?

After all, Eren didn’t really know what to say when he met Levi. 

Was he supposed to tell him about the papers he had sorted out from Hange and wanted to give them to him? It dawned on him too late on why didn’t he wait until Levi went back to work? Wasn’t Eren bothering him on his day off if he barged into his house like this?

Was he supposed to talk about… ‘that’ incident? Two possibilities. One, Levi would pretend it never happened and Eren would look stupid as hell. Two, Levi would whack his head and call him an impudent brat for even bringing it up. Also, didn’t Eren promise himself he would act like it didn’t bother him? If he brought it up, wouldn’t it feel like he was accusing Levi for having impure thoughts towards his own student? 

Should he just… return home for the day?

Eren leaned back on the door with a dejected sigh. At the end of the day, he really couldn’t get a read of this man. He kept pissing Levi off no matter what he did or said, and not to mention the slip-ups of his affection that might alarm Levi of his intentions.

And that was when he fell.

“Ouch!” Eren tumbled with a thud on his butt, suddenly finding himself plopped down between the opened door and wooden porch. 

Then came a booming voice from on top of his head. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Sir,” Eren called woefully as he looked up from where he's plopped, finding those grey eyes that he had missed for a while now. “You're home.”

Levi gazed at him with a mild look. “Are you looking for Mikasa?”

“No,” Eren pushed himself to stand, clutching the tote bag he was carrying close to his chest. “I'm here for you.”

Of course, Levi hadn't expected such a response, not after what transpired between them last time. Feigning composure, his brow raised in question. “What for?”

What for…? Eren considered the two options he had drafted in his mind before, and eventually settled with a “I heard you just got back from a business trip. I wanted to make sure you're eating well.” 

The second those words left his mouth, Eren regretted it. Did he sound too pushy? What was he, Levi's little wife? Telling him to eat and making sure he's well? 

So Eren immediately added, “Oh, my mom was cooking stew! So, she thought I'd share it with you…”

Upon this explanation, Levi couldn't possibly refuse the boy's offer. He accepted the tote bag of packed stew and some… paperworks? “Thanks, tell your mom that I'm grateful for it. You can go back now.”

Just when the door was about to close, Eren stuck his foot at the gap, then grabbed the edge as he forced it back open. 

“What now?”

“My mom told me that I need to reheat the stew.”

“I can reheat it myself.”

“But aren't you tired…”

“I'm just jet lagged, not handicapped.” Levi frowned. “It's just reheating stew, nothing I can't handle myself.”

Eren forced the door to open wider. “But I'd like to do it for you.”

Levi was at a loss, he was truly done for. When being subjected by those pleading emerald eyes, he really had no choice but to: “Fine. Throw this for me and get the hell in.”

Eren received the trash bag Levi had initially wanted to take out when he happened to stumble upon Eren at his front door. When the implication of permission dawned on Eren, his face instantly brightened up. Skipping towards the trash can at the end of the pathway, he immediately ran back to catch the door that was swaying closed behind Levi, yelping, “Sir, wait! I'm coming!”

Levi tripped over his own home slippers. “Don't say something like that.”

“Something like what?” Eren already stepped through the threshold, door closing behind him as he gazed at Levi with a smile. His cheeks were slightly flushed, puffing breaths out of his lungs from the small run he did, while a sheen layer of sweat covered his forehead. When he caught sight of Levi's sloppiness, Eren found it almost cute. 

Levi's eyes were glaring at Eren, obviously a mere facade for the embarrassment at his conscience. “Don't say something like I'm coming, it's noisy.”

“Why though? If I don't say it, wouldn't you think I'm impolite?”

Levi's glare got even harsher, bulging like his eyes were gonna come out from the sockets. “Whether I think you're impolite or not, you're still gonna force your way into my house! Just shut your shitty mouth up while you're at it.”

Eren was baffled when Levi left him at that for the kitchen. Then he smiled even wider, his mood immediately lifted up when he thought: It seemed that Levi had decided to forgive and forget what transpired between them. Telling Eren not to say "I'm coming!" and letting him into his house freely would be the first step that he'd welcome Eren no matter what. 

Of course, it was a given thought for any normal person. It was such a normal phrase one would hear everywhere. 

But to Levi… it was a bit different. When he saw the boy breathing hard, chest heaving up and down from the small adrenaline rush, cheeks tinted pink and sweat rolled down from his forehead… It made Levi think of the way the boy would look when he laid beneath Levi, eyes tearing up and lips slightly agape as he gasped for breath, Sir, I’m coming… 

Levi's already elevated body temperature due to being sleep-deprived burned even hotter. What was he, a fucking teenager with raging hormones going through a puberty? How vile! 

“Sir, you should go back to rest. I will reheat it for you.”

Levi watched as Eren took away the pot and spatula from his hands. The boy already busying about in his kitchen like it was second nature to him, so Levi went to his pantry corner for tea. 

“Ah,” Eren caught his hands just as he reached for a teabag. His hot breath blowing against Levi's raven hair, gently brushing against the man's nape, as he said, “Let me make you the tea as well. You can wait for me at the living room.”

Those palms against Levi's cold ones engulfed him with warmth that he had always longed for. It made Levi want to be greedy for more… and that's why he had always ran and shy away from the boy's fiery passion. 

Levi knew Eren was off-limits for him. 

Levi pulled his hands away, as natural as possible, not sparing the boy another word as he obliged and went to the living room. He had no energy to banter with the boy, and a help while resting after a trip was appreciated regardless, so Levi plopped down on his couch and laid his head on the backrest with a hum. 

Eren lost track of time as he waited for the stew to boil and the tea to brew. By the time he carried a bowl of stew and a glass of hot tea to the living room, Levi had drifted asleep on the couch. 

Left with nothing else to do yet not wanting to return back home yet, Eren initiated to grab a broom and started cleaning the house. Levi had left for a week, and Mikasa… had never been the one very fond of cleaning. 

Maybe it was due to Levi's sensitivity to noises, but it was only a few minutes later that he woke up to the sounds of robot vacuum and mop. 

“Sorry, sir. Did I wake you up?”

Levi pushed himself to sit back up on the couch, catching a glance of the boy wiping his TV shelf with vigor. He had wanted to get the boy to scram after reheating the stew, but now he had fallen asleep and gave the boy all the more reason to stay longer in his house. 

“The stew is still warm, and I managed to make the tea at the right temperature. They should still be warm enough to enjoy.”

Levi nodded. “Thank you, Eren.” Then he grabbed a pair of chopsticks and froze. Why is there only one bowl of stew and one glass of hot tea? “Eren, aren't you eating?”

“I already ate at home, all of those are yours.” 

Eren's answer left the man speechless. He thought Eren barged his way in to reheat the stew so he could eat together with Levi, like how the little boy always did in the past, but… forget it. Levi tried his best to shrug off the disappointment in his heart, cooling his expression before Eren could notice the gloom on his face. 

“I'm done cleaning here, sir. Where can I wash off the mop and rag?”

“The water faucet at the back porch.”

“Oh, through the door next to the kitchen?”

Levi hummed. “Careful, though. It can get slippery.”

So Eren threw a yes, sir over his shoulder as he skipped his way to the back door. It was a closed back porch with water faucet, washing machine, and a shelf. Another sliding door in front of him would probably lead to the backyard. He rolled up his pants before going to wash the rag and mop. Once he hung the cloths at a nearby hanger, Eren thought the cold water was refreshing against the late summer air, so he washed his hands and dunked his head under the water faucet as well. 

“Haaa…” Eren let out a satisfied chuckle. He stepped towards the door, wanting to ask Levi for a towel to dry his hair and face with, when he accidentally caught sight of purple from the corner of his eyes. He quirked an eyebrow, "Hm?"

When curiosity got the best of the boy, he gingerly pushed the sliding door leading towards the backyard to get a better look.

What greeted his sight had him struck dumb.

In front of him was a field of purple bellflowers, blooming all around every corner possible, amongst the sumptuous lush greenery. Eren wasn’t at all surprised that Levi would have a small garden, in fact Eren thought that the man would be very well-suited, due to his caring nature and discipline to tend to them diligently. 

What baffled Eren was that, “Aren’t these bellflowers the one I planted in front of my own house?”

The thought came to Eren so naturally, as if it was his own memory that he had. However, it was only a second later when realization dawned on him that the memory of planting those bellflowers in front of his house was the one belonging to this world’s Eren… who originally had this body before the Devil of Paradis was rebirthed.

It was only then when he remembered… or more like, he peeked into those old memories. 

The days that little boy had planted the bellflower to accompany the big tree in front of his house, the weeks that little boy had shared pots and pots of flowers for Levi, the years of thinking that Eren’s affection for the man next door was for naught when Levi told him he had thrown away all those pots of flower.

But Levi had kept the flowers.

Eren was astonished, to say the least. Why would Levi keep the flowers that he so desperately convinced this world’s Eren he had thrown away?

Could it be… that Levi… actually liked Eren from a long time ago? No, no, no. No way, that couldn’t be. 

If that was the case, then what was the Devil of Paradis supposed to do? He knew of Levi’s feelings, and he could return those feelings as well… but did the Devil of Paradis have the right to return the love Levi had for the boy?

What would Levi think… if he knew that the one he fell in love with had ‘died’ somewhere along the way and was replaced by this filthy devil who took over his body? This Devil of Paradis who was an impostor with blood in his hands, sins unable to be atoned for eternity, playing a good boy act in a high schooler’s body when this fiend should be burned in the deepest pit of hell?

What was… Eren supposed to do?

Levi was just dumping his dishes to the sink when the door beside him swung open and slammed shut with a bang. He wasn’t one to easily startle though, so he only glanced at Eren with a questioning gaze.

“Sorry, I almost slipped. The floor was way too slippery.” Eren said. The hem of his clothes was thoroughly soaked, having wiped his wet hair and face with his T-shirt, and it clung uncomfortably against his skin. “I also… turned the faucet too big so now I’m drenched.”

Levi shook his head. “You’re gonna catch a cold like that. Go grab some clothes from my wardrobe and get changed.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine! I’m gonna head home anyway!”

Levi’s hands that were washing the dishes paused for a second, then he resumed like nothing bothered him at all. “Good, it’s about time anyway.”

“Then, I’ll go back home now, sir.” Eren smiled, reaching for the front door and said, “I’ll see you tomorrow at the school festival, sir! Make sure you come to my class’ cafe, alright?” before the door was shut behind his disappearing back.

In the kitchen, Levi had finished washing the dishes. Thinking to grab the rag to wipe the coffee table, he stepped through the kitchen back door and halted.

Huh?

“Huh?” 

For a moment, his heart seemed to drop from where it settled in his chest, down to his full stomach. Levi felt like he was gonna puke out the stew he had just eaten. His hand reached for the sliding door that was wide open, leading to the backyard of purple bellflowers, as if trying to show off its vibrant petals for anyone to see. 

He took a step over the sliding door then looked downwards.

Ah. 

There were fresh drops of water still pooling near the sliding door. 

Levi had left home for a week and only landed this morning so he hadn’t tended to the garden, and Mikasa never once stepped foot to the backyard after he told her not to, all those years ago. That meant only one person had visited here—the one who just left in a hurry.

The grip on the sliding door was trembling. Had Levi exerted more force, he might snap the door into two. When nobody was in his periphery, Levi let his facade slip. The worry in his gaze, the way his face turned from pale white to blue then to flushed red, the juddering of his heart in his ribcage, and the muted noise in his ears. 

Levi had kept the garden of bellflowers, every single stalk a gift from the boy, hidden behind the sliding door where no one could lay eyes upon them for many, many years. Levi had kept his feelings hidden behind his facade, his lies, and his harsh reprimands for as many years. 

But now, suddenly they were out in the open, found by none other than the object of his affection. Eren had seen his garden of bellflowers, one gifted to Levi and one he had dedicated back to the boy. 

Eren had seen his feelings in its rawest form. And after catching Levi red-handed, he ran away in a hurry… as if to pretend it didn’t bother him, or maybe to turn a blind eye to this old man’s feelings.

“Fuck.” Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

FUCK!

There was no way out for Levi. Not even if the world was ending right now where the earth beneath him opened and swallowed him whole would save him from this.

When one found out that the object of their affection had discovered their secretive crush, the normal response would be surprise—usually, out of happiness.

But Levi had passed his mid-thirties last year. In this life, he had spent his entire life alone. 

Sure, he had dated a couple of times during his teenage years back then—everyone had a phase like that, no?—but all of them broke up with him for the same reasons: “Your words are too blunt,” or “You’re too heartless,” or “You’re good-looking, but you really are not caring enough.” And that was not to mention how the students in the school acted around this tyrannical teacher.

When one was subjected to a stereotype for too long, they eventually started to take those words into reflection and bore them to his own self. Opinions of others started to become reality to him and when Levi thought of how to view himself, the words that’d come up in his head were blunt, and heartless, and uncaring. And, not to mention, he was very fucking old already. 

Thus, without missing a beat, Levi just knew that Eren was sure to think him disgusting, vile and preposterous, absolutely shameless. What kind of hideous old man would harbor such affection for a teenager half his fucking age? 

How dare this person have the audacity to like… to covet such a young boy, not to mention his own student? 

If Eren caught wind of Levi’s feelings, he would definitely freak out. Would… Eren hate him for it?

Levi sighed. “He sure would.”

When Levi thought about how those emerald jewels might look at him with apparent fear lingering beneath those dimmed light in his eyes, Levi thought he might as well be the one running away before Eren ever confronted him at all.

Should he prepare now… Maybe he should take a day off tomorrow…

But when the wind blew, Eren’s voice rang in his ears: “I’ll see you tomorrow at the school festival, sir! Make sure you come to my class’s cafe, alright?”

Eren. Eren. Eren.

This boy that had caught a hold of Levi’s heart for so many years. How could he still invite Levi to visit him at school even after finding out about Levi’s appalling intentions towards him? Wasn’t he scared of this old man harboring a crush on him at all?

Levi glanced back at the fluttering bellflowers against the breeze, then he kneeled down to stroke at its little petals. He thought of how Eren was thriving in his young age, how he had the beauty to attract kids his age and date whoever he wanted.

If… if only Levi was as pretty and mild-tempered as Mikasa… or as youthful and gallant as Jean… or if he were as smart and friendly as Armin. If he was younger and more pleasant to be around with… then could he stand a chance?

Levi shook his head, he dared not to entertain more of the ifs, because he knew he’d only end up with regrets in his heart. He was pleased enough with what he had right now. He was a next door neighbor that Eren took a liking to, and even Eren wasn’t scared of him despite his tyrannical behavior at school… at least, not yet.

At the end of the day, Levi found his hands tied. He really couldn’t do anything but to wait and see what would happen. So he admonished himself to remain calm and gazed at the lunchbox Eren had left, still half-filled with stew.

If Eren wanted Levi to come visit his class’ cafe tomorrow, then who was Levi to refuse the offer? He might as well took this one last chance to see the boy before he left the boy’s life for good.

Notes:

I think the slow burn is already burning enough, so I wonder if Levi and Eren should just talk it out. Am I rushing too much?

Thank you everyone for your support last time. I truly appreciate every single one of you. My country people's demands eventually lost against the tyrannical government, but we'll still do what we can to raise awareness!