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Sophie has always craved the forbidden. To do the things that her parents warned her not to do like climb on top of of the bookshelves of their family library when she was three because they said ‘Soph, don’t do that, you’ll hurt yourself.’ She ended up falling and fracturing her arm, but she didn’t care. The elation she felt when she was suspended in mid-air was as close as she could imagine flying would be.
Later on in her adolescence, Sophie found that claims like that didn’t deter her, they spurned her. Made her want to lick the flames of repercussions. Made her addicted to the feeling of truly being alive.
Something happened in college. She boarded that side of herself up. She never feared the thoughts of others until she and her roommate had a dalliance. She was drunk and told her she loved her. She was so embarrassed that she ended running into the arms of Graham.
It was no surprise to her when she was immediately taken by Margo Banks. The woman’s encapsulating gaze sent her a flutter. She wanted the inevitable burn that was Margo. Like the burning sensation of alcohol in her throat. She knew Margo could make her feel something, make her burn a-light with the life she always wanted.
Graham never gave that to her. She felt bad, but he was there. He was a safe space. He kept her away from climbing the shelves of her life. It was nice for a while until; she started to know that she settled. She didn’t want to settle. She didn’t want to put her career on hold, but after the accident, she started to hide inside herself. She felt parts of her die when Graham would speak for her and say that Jack was the reason her career stopped. Her son was the light of her life. She couldn’t afford to lose him. So, she went with the story Graham told to cover up the truth.
Margo took one look at her and unlocked her. She exploited the shameful parts of Sophie. She made herself at home in her thoughts, quelling the pain of a past full of lies. Sophie wanted Margo to make herself at home in her heart and her body too. She’d do anything to feel the appreciative glance and smile that Margo would give her. She lived for the praises that Margo gave. They were encouraging, they were addicting, and she needed more of them.
Sophie couldn’t help the quake in her chest hearing Margo’s boots clunk on the hardwood patio. She seemed to know when Sophie was feeling out of sorts.
“Are you okay?” Margo’s southern drawl and cadence in her voice comforted Sophie’s anxiety.
“Yeah. It was just getting too much in there. I don’t really fit.” Sophie admitted. She was feeling insecure, but she thought it would be best to lead with the truth.
“Don’t worry ‘bout them, darlin’. They always snap first when new people come around. They’ll take to you like water soon enough. I know I did.”
Margo’s smile causing a similar one to form on Sophie’s lips. She always knew what to say.
“You’re sweet.” It left Sophie’s mouth quicker than she anticipated.
Margo moved closer to Sophie. A dark glint was reflected in her blue eyes.
“I’m not, but I like you.”
Sophie felt breathless. A few lines from Margo and she was willing to do anything the other woman wanted. She could sense that messing around with another married woman was dangerous, but Margo could be the fire to her kerosene.
“I like you too.”
“Oh, yeah? What do you like about me?”
“That there’s more to you than what anyone in there knows.” Sophie gestured toward the kitchen.
Margo’s eyebrows shot up in surprise and let out a whistle.
“Well, damn, Boston. What else?”
Sophie knew that Margo was entertaining her. She bit her lip in concentration not breaking eye contact with Margo. Her heart was hammering in her chest, started to slow to a low hum. She felt herself relax.
“You crave what I crave.”
Margo looked into her eyes then to her mouth and back again. A devilish grin made its way on her lips.
Margo’s voice came out low and husky “What’s that?”
“Fire.” Sophie replied. She was feeling brave. She wanted to see how far she could get at Margo to see what she suspected was true. If her wants were reciprocated. She knew the other women might come looking for them. She didn’t care if anyone walked out to find them openly flirting in broad daylight. She just wanted more time with Margo.
A hand tangling in her hair made Sophie nearly melt.
“I do.” Margo whispered.
They were locked in a gaze. Sophie could feel everything everywhere all at once like atoms colliding in a black hole. How she wanted to be stuck in the deep abyss with Margo with no way out.
“Do you want to go on the boat?”
“What?”
“We have a boat. Do you want to go on a ride on the lake?”
Sophie was dumbfounded. She swallowed her desire.
“Yeah, that sounds fun.”
“Good. You’ll love it.”
Sophie knows that Margo was trying to show her a good time, but she was a little disappointed that the others were getting on the boat with them and… with guns. Sophie hated the abominations. The amount of damage they did. She could never imagine toting around with one. Now she’s on a boat with women that appear to love them as if they were the new accessories for a lake excursion. She figured this was Texas. She shouldn’t be so judgmental.
The boat veered off from Margo’s doc. The group was headed straight for the other side of the lake. They docked. Callie, Monae, and Taylor grabbing the rifles as they exited the vessel. Jill made sure that the women exited carefully. Sophie took note that she took care of everyone.
Sophie took a moment to turn from the group and look out at the lake. It almost reminded her of home. The quiet bubbling of water. The teetering of other boats somewhere far of on the lake. The birds squawking and a mewling of some unknown creature brought a peaceful smile to her lips. Maybe this could be home.
“If you close your eyes and breathe in deep, you can almost smell the fall coming.” Margo whispered in Sophie’s ear like a solacious secret.
The pair was alone again. Sophie remembered hearing Margo mention they’d catch up to them in a minute.
She followed Margo’s instructions and did just that. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, exhaled and could feel the nip of autumn, see the leaves fall, smell the apple cider, and pumpkin spice.
Margo’s hand found hers when she turned around with excitement.
“You are magic.”
“I’ve been called the devil, but never magic. I’ll take that. I’ll be anything that gets that beautiful smile of yours going.”
Sophie felt her insides grow warm. A blush crept it’s way over her face.
“And I make you blush. You keep reacting this way and I might have to take you... Right. Here.”
Margo’s hands were on Sophie’s waist steadying her. Sophie could swear that if she wasn’t being held by Margo she’d fall over. Interesting concept, being held by Margo.
“Fuck.” Fell from Sophie’s lips.
The hands on Sophies waist tightened. Sophie felt wetness pool in her underwear. If she were sitting down, she’d clinch her thighs to stop the anticipation. Margo’s hands relaxed on her waist. Thumbs brushed slow circles where the pressure was released. A moan fell from Sophie’s lips.
Margo smirked at the visible reaction. She liked what she could do to others with a touch here and there, but when it came to Sophie, she wanted to see what other reaction she’d have. It was like she was being touched by a messiah.
“You’ll know when we are, darlin’. I’d never take a woman on no boat for the first time. I am not a teenage boy.”
A giggle made Sophie smile and feel aroused all at once. Not wanting to have sex with a married woman was growing difficult.
“Y’all comin’!” Callie shouted from a distance. A gunshot made Sophie flinch away from Margo.
Margo noticed the reaction. She caught Sophie’s hand.
“It’s okay. They’re just shooting pigeons.” Margo said soothingly. The woman’s voice was like a shot of morphine in Sophie’s veins.
Sophie was confused. Her face screwed up trying to picture it.
“They’re not actual ones. They’re clay. It’s like that game Duck Hunt from when we were kids, did you play it?”
Sophie shook her head.
“No, I think I had a neighbor that did.”
“It’s like that. Only someone else makes them fly. You’ll see.”
Margo made her way out of the boat. She bent slightly, her hand outstretched toward Sophie in offering. Sophie took one more glance at the lake before taking the hand that was offered to her.
The shooting was loud. It made Sophie twinge in excitement. It was like she was doing something forbidden. She watched Margo call ‘pull’ and Callie releasing the trap. The pigeon would fly up, with precision Margo would wait and shoot. The clay would explode into a bright red color. The actions made Sophie more attracted to Margo. The other woman was charming, unapologetically feminine, and both intellectually and emotionally intelligent. Seeing her with a rifle made her dangerous to Sophie. She marveled at the type of protector she could be.
“Callie and Margo always pull for each other.” Monae explained as Margo went again.
“Callie is like a professional. She’s won awards for it.” Jill added layering on the impressive accolades of the red head.
Sophie looked at Callie. She saw how the other woman watched Margo. She saw a certain flicker in her eyes. Sophie shared the same look whenever she looked at the brunette. They were both smitten. Sophie started wondering if Margo and Callie ever-
“Alright, It’s my turn now!” Callie said excitedly. It was clear she was in her element. She appeared more relaxed.
“Sophie, you should give it a try.” Margo offered.
Sophie felt everyone’s eyes on her. She’s never fired a gun in her life. She didn’t want to hurt anyone. That’s what guns did. They kill. Like steel and titanium on car like a body rolling over the hood. An amalgamation of screams, blood, and tragedy in its wake. She started spiraling. She heard her parents voice Soph, don’t. You’ll get hurt.
“I can’t. I’ve never-“
Callie laughed smugly. “See, she doesn’t want to. I’ll go.” She happily cut in.
Margo didn’t take the bait. “Sophie, come here and I’ll show you what to do.”
Sophie tried refusing again. Margo was having none of it. She continued to push. The rest of the group safe for Callie encouraged Sophie to go. She always thought she was stronger than succumbing to peer pressure, but she thought wrong in this instance.
Margo cheered. She took off her safety glasses and handed them to Sophie. Once they were secured on her face, Margo directed Sophie on how to hold the gun and warned her about the kick. Sophie took a deep breath like at the lake; she could feel fall coming and exhaled. She was focused.
“Pull.”
Callie released the trap.
Sophie pulled the trigger…no kick came. Nothing came, actually.
Callie guffawed. “Geeze. The safety is on.”
The group behind them let out small giggles.
Sophie felt herself warm over with embarrassment.
Margo came up next to Sophie. Her presence caused Sophie to relax.
“That’s alright, darlin’. This time: flick that trigger back, relax and shoot.” Margo instructed carefully.
Sophie wanted to do right by Margo. She held the rifle, flipped the safety off, took a deep breath remembering the sounds of the lake, the nearing fall, and exhaled. She was ready.
“Pull.”
Callie released the trap once again. She was starting to grow impatient.
Sophie held the rifle lightly against her rifle shoulder and pulled the trigger. The pain shocked her more than the noise. The kick got her.
“OW!” Her shoulder ached.
“This is a joke.” Callie commented.
“Shut up, Call.” Margo said. She was beside Sophie. “That happens. This time, hold the rifle tight to your shoulder you don’t want that kick to leave a mark.” She gave slow instructions, all the while her hands were showing Sophie what to do. Margo’s touch left a heat wherever her hands traveled. “Now widen your stance.” Margo’s leg came between Sophie’s legs. She fought the urge to clinch her legs around Margo. She wanted to know what the length of her would feel like. Margo brought the rifle to Sophie’s shoulder guiding her. Comforting hands covered her own. Sophie felt safe for the first time during this activity. There wasn’t a supercut of noise and blood. Just her and Margo. The lake, Margo’s smile, piercing gaze, fire-
“When you are ready, exhale and pull the trigger.”
Sophie felt herself lock in at those words. She wanted to be good for Margo, so she decided to be.
“Pull.”
Callie sighed and released the trap once more.
Sophie zeroed in on the clay, held the rifle firm to her shoulder and pulled the trigger. She felt like flying as the red color from the clay burst in the air. Excitement ran rampant in her.
“Damn! Looks like she’s coming for your title!” Margo shouted at Callie, impressed by Sophie’s shot.
Sophie pretended not to see Callie cut her eyes at her and hold up her own rifle ready to move Sophie out of the way for her turn.
The group continued trapshooting for the remainder of the afternoon until the sun started to set.
The boat ride was raucous laughter. Sophie felt like she started to belong once again. The old her hated guns. Maybe the Texas version of her didn’t mind them as much. It was getting dark, and she promised Graham that she’d be back to say night to Jack.
The group was walking back to Margo’s lake house when the brunette checked in with her.
“Did you have fun?”
“Yeah, it was a lot of fun. Thank you for inviting me.” Sophie said as the group stopped before the driveway. She figured the trapshooting would be the last event of the day.
Margo looked at Sophie shocked. “You don’t think that’s it, do ya?”
“Um, I don’t know. I promised Graham-“
“We were all going to go to Joe’s.”
“Who’s Joe?”
“Not a person. A line dancing bar.” Margo said raising her hands up in excitement like she was going to give a twirl right then and there.
Sophie’s heart sank. She couldn’t. Steel, thump, blood. “I don’t think Graham would approve of me going to a club.”
“It’s not a club. It’s a bar and who’s going to tell him?”
“We don’t keep secrets.”
“Marriage isn’t any fun without secrets.” Margo commented.
Sophie stopped in her tracks. She wanted so badly to belong with Margo that the thought of leaving and disappointing Margo was too much. The brunette was her island, and she didn’t want to go back to civilization just yet. She could always leave early to send Jack of to bed.
“One secret would be okay.”
Margo whooped. She brought an arm around Sophie’s shoulders tugging her toward her truck. Callie was already leaning on the passenger side door. A scoff left her lips when she saw Sophie was in tow with Margo.
“Be nice, Callie.” Margo warned Callie as she opened the door for Sophie to scoot across and sit in the middle between Callie and Margo.
Sophie never wanted to get to a bar quicker in her life. Thankfully for her, Margo has a lead foot. They peeled down the driveway as soon as Callie closed the passenger door.
The ride wasn’t long. Sophie felt like a fish released back into water from captivity when Margo opened the driver’s side door, her hand out for Sophie to take. She gladly took the brunette’s hand. Sophie started to think how easily their hands fit together like a lock and key. Their hands remained joined until they hit the door of the bar. Sophie noted that Margo reluctantly dropped her hand upon entering the establishment. She turned to give her an apologetic look. Sophie noted that appearances were everything in Maplebrook. She didn’t want to be the cause of any rumors surrounding Margo and Jed. Fuck, Margo was married and so was she. She couldn’t be seen as someone galivanting around town, lusting over someone else’s wife. What was she thinking?
Sophie took note of how large the bar was on the inside. The front room gave the appeal of an old school country bar, but once she wounded through urns with the group she was able to see the bar open up into a large dance floor.
The group made their way to the bar. Callie was next to Margo ordering four shots. Sophie smiled when Margo asked if she’d like a club soda. Sophie made sure to add with a lime for the bartender. She got her drink and was immediately pulled by Margo to a table.
“I know you don’t drink. That doesn’t mean you’re getting out of body shots!”
Sophie was going to ask how when Margo sat her down on a stool, got close to the shoulder that had a bruise from the rifle earlier, and gave a tantalizingly slow lick above her breast. Margo looked from her eyes to her lips, then added some salt. The brunette got close to her face to place the shot glass in the bosom of Sophie’s dress. She felt breath hitch when Margo licked the salt from the same area. Her face grew hot as Margo ducked down taking the shot glass in her mouth swallowing the shot like a pro. Sophie had never been so turned on.
Margo gave Sophie a wink. “I feel like dancing.” She took Sophie’s hand again leading them to the dance floor.
Sophie kindly offered to watch everyone’s bags as the others danced. She was only ever a dancer if she was drunk. Since she didn’t drink anymore, she didn’t feel comfortable partaking. Especially, since it was line dancing.
Sophie watched Margo dance with many a dance partners. The men and women would orbit around her. The way Margo’s hair twirled with her body made Sophie imagine what Margo’s hair looked like laid out on bedsheets, above her like a curtain, in-between her legs…
A chair screeching brought her attention away from Margo.
A man with a glassy eye, took his hat off looking straight at Margo. “Can I buy y’all a drink?”
Sophie was sure it was a genuine question, but something about him was sketchy. “No, thank you.”
“Shame.” He wasn’t leaving.
Alarm bells sounded off. As if hearing Sophie’s apprehension. Margo left her dance partner.
“Can we help you?” She asked with equal parts kind and icy.
The man sat up straight. “I wanted to buy y’all a drink.”
Margo swallowed. “No, thank you.”
The man nodded in understanding. Sophie could see him making something out in his head. “It’s funny. You look like this girl I used to know.”
Margo looked at him quizzically.
“Yeah, you like this girl Mandy, I used to know. Yup, lMandy from Alba, Texas.”
Margo looked as if she’d been slapped. “Get the fuck out of here!”
The man placed his hat back on and tipped it toward Sophie.
Margo gestured for Sophie to take her hand. “Are you okay?” She’d never seen anything startle Margo. She figured the other woman wasn’t afraid of anything. She guessed wrong. Creeps in bars might be her line.
Margo nodded her head. She watched the man disappear back in the crowd. She gestured to a waitress. “May I have a shot, please?” She took the shot quickly as if washing down a bad taste.
“Are you okay? That guy was weird.” Sophie asked again.
“I’m fine, sugar. Let’s dance.”
“I don’t know how.”
“That’s okay. Just watch me and do what I do.”
Sophie tried not to be disappointed when Margo got her a dance partner that was not herself. The man seemed nice. The two danced with their partners for a few songs. They twirled and laughed as Sophie nearly got tangled in her sandals when a very drunk patron was trying to swing her around as part of an upbeat line dance.
Margo seemed to lose interest and suggested their group play pool. Sophie was happy to sit out as Callie called dibs on Margo to be her partner against Taylor and Monae. Sophie was marveled by how well Margo hit the balls. She would smile whenever Margo would make a trick shot and offer Sophie a wink.
Jill coming back into the fray along with her son Brad and his friend Jamie made her go outside and try and catch an Uber. She missed Jack’s bedtime. She silently scolded herself. She prayed for a car to show up on her Uber map, but none appeared. She let out an anxious sigh.
“You alright, ma’am?” a voice prompted her to look up.
She saw Brad’s friend Jamie looking back at her.
“I’m trying to get an Uber.”
Jamie sucked his teeth in empathy. “You’re not going to get an Uber out here. We’re too far out. I can give you a ride.” He offered.
Sophie looked at him then back to her phone. Still no car. She didn’t know this young man and he offered anyway. She was going round in her head. She can’t take a ride from a stranger.
“Everything alright.”
Sophie soothed at Margo’s voice.
“She was trying to get an Uber.” Jamie explained.
Callie laughed. “Are you serious?”
Margo placed a hand to Sophie’s shoulder. “Don’t be ridiculous. We are too far out. I can take you home.” She took Sophie’s hand pulling her toward the parking lot.
“You’re my ride!” Callie shouted after them.
“Monae will take you.” Margo dismissed the other woman.
Margo opened the passenger side door for Sophie. The blonde gave a polite thank you.
“Oh, don’t thank me yet, darlin. I haven’t gotten you home.”
Sophie let out loud laugh. There was something about the way Margo treated her that made her feel taken care of. Secure not smothered.
Margo didn’t speed on the way back toward Sophie’s place in town. They sat in a comfortable silence.
A truck behind them honking pulled them out of their reverie.
Margo was asking for her gun and slowing down way below the speed limit. Sophie felt her heart start to race. The guy from the bar was apparently following them. The truck sped past them honking haphazardly.
“What the hell was that, Margo?” Sophie asked exasperated.
Margo released a breath. “I need a cigarette.”
They found an empty parking lot. Margo parked, killed the engine, and hopped out sparking a cigarette.
“What’s going on?”
Margo took a drag, releasing it into the night sky. “You don’t want to get involved with me, Sophie.”
Sophie was gob smacked. “I think that’s for me to decide.” She walked up to Margo taking her cigarette from her hand and taking a drag herself. She returned the cigarette back to the shocked face of the brunette.
“I’m not who you think I am.”
“Who are you?”
“Mandy, from Alba fuckin’ Texas.”
Sophie was trying to connect the dots, but nothing was clicking.
“And who is Mandy?”
Margo let out a laugh. “You really wanna know?” Sophie nodded urging the other woman to continue. “A murderer.” She took one final drag of the cigarette, tossed it on the ground and snuffed it with her boot.
Sophie released a shaky breath. She had to tell her who she was too. “So am I.”
Margo looked into Sophie’s eyes trying to find a hint of lie. Not seeing one, she let out an impressed whistle. “I’ll be damned, Boston. We are two fucking peas in a pod.” She enveloped Sophie in a hug. She felt secure. Her body relaxed.
The hug ended. Margo reached for Sophie’s hands and tangled them with her own. She looked down into blue eyes.
“My hands are killer’s hands.”
Sophie shook her head in disbelief. She brought Margo’s hands to her lips kissing the knuckles. “Your hands are what you make of them.”
Margo tilted her head in curiosity. “Is that so? What do you make of them, darlin?”
Sophie placed Margo’s hands on her waist. “Their safety.”
Margo rubbed soft circles on Sophie’s waist. “From what?”
“Everything I don’t want.” Sophie replied looking into Margo’s dark blue eyes.
Margo placed her forehead to Sophie’s. “And what do want?”
Sophie was afraid to say it. Once she said it there would be no going back. She threw caution to the wind. She wanted to fly. She wanted to burn.
“I want you.”
The kerosene was lit.
Their lips met softly as if greeting one another, once acquainted it was a frenzy of passionate kisses, tongues meeting, hands grabbing as much skin and clothing as they could. It didn’t feel like enough until teeth started to bite at flesh leaving swollen lips and moans breaking out in between breaths.
It became too much. Sophie, let go. She felt her world leave its axis.
Margo’s eyes were more dark than before.
“You okay?”
Sophie nodded her head. “Mhm. Your lips are just intoxicating.” She figured the truth would be the best way to be from now on.
Margo placed another kiss to Sophie’s lips teasingly. “There’s more where that came from. When we are alone like this, you can do it any time you like.”
Sophie felt herself shiver at the thought of kissing Margo more. It made her skin buzz.
“I think I should get home.”
Margo nodded.
“You’re not going to ask me how I did it?”
She was referring to the murder Sophie gathered. “When the time is right, you will tell me.”
“How do you know I will tell you?”
“I don’t. But you can trust me.”
“I can, huh?”
“Yup.”
“Why is that?”
“Because you need me like I need you, like the fall that’s coming.”
Margo placed another kiss to Sophie’s lips smiling.
“You sure you gotta get back?”
Sophie shrugged. “What else is there to do? Graham wants me home.”
Margo rolled her eyes. She never gave a fuck about what any man wanted. She didn’t want Sophie to be like the other weak women that bended to the will of a man. Husband or not, he did not own her. She’d show her in due time.
“And if I wanted you here with me for 10 more minutes?”
“I’d be here with you for 10 minutes.”
Margo took Sophie’s hand placing a kiss to her knuckles. “You deserve to do whatever the hell you want.” Her gaze was penetrating the veneer that was the rest of Sophie’s shell. “You never have to tell me what your hands did. But when you don’t want to carry it, give it to me. I feel like I have to protect you.”
Sophie nodded in understanding.
“I promise. We can protect each other.”
Margo placed a kiss to Sophie’s forehead. “Good girl.” She had a wily look in her eyes. She was scheming. “Have you ever done donuts?”
Sophie hasn’t but she was willing to be even more late getting home if it meant spending more time with Margo a la some romantic trope from an old movie. Graham could wait. Jack would be there in the morning, and she’d be there to greet them. The rest of the night belonged to her and Margo alone.