Habits

by Funnygirl00

Summary:

December 23rd, Thomas Shelby requested that Billy send someone new to his room. Billy did. But what he meant by new, wasn’t meant to be her first day on the job. For the first time, since Grace’s death, a whore numbed the pain. A whore named Katherine. Katherine soon becomes a very bad habit that he can't do without. (Sequel to 'wrapped in red'.)

Chapter 1: December 23rd, 1925

December 23rd, 1925

---

He hated the holidays. They only served to remind him how alone he was. 

The first Christmas without his Grace had been absolute Hell. Now, he’d lost more of his family. He’d nearly lost Arthur, John, Polly and Michel in order to protect his son. He knew that was a possibility when he’d made that decision. But Charlie was all he had of his beloved wife and he wasn’t going to lose his son. Polly should have understood. She’d lost Michael and Anna. Anna was forever lost to her and while she’d denied it. She knew that she’d kill him in a heartbeat if it would bring her daughter back to her. The only person who’d speak to him was Ada. She’d known loss when she’d lost Freddie and she’d have done whatever to protect Karl. Not everyone understood his decision after their close brush with death, even though they all were parents. They wouldn’t forgive him and he couldn’t blame them right now.

“Not going home for Christmas, Mr. Shelby?” Billy said as he approached, giving Tommy his customary glass of whiskey at the Midland Hotel in Birmingham.

He shook his head as he lit a cigarette. “Tomorrow.”

Besides, Billy knew what he’d come here for. It wasn’t a drink and it damn well wasn’t a cigarette. “So, Maria or Clara? Or Elizabeth?”

He didn’t know. He was…bored. He was pretty sure he’d gone through most of the women around these parts. They were all so cold and lifelike. That’s how it was. “It's Christmas. Someone new, Billy.”

Billy nodded and left him. For a brief second, his thoughts wandered. He ached for a little bit of human warmth and affection. He missed Grace. He missed the way her arms were around him. The way she breathed softly in his ear as she whispered his name. She haunted him still and he was in love with her still. No one in his family liked her, so he’d been left to mourn her alone. At times he felt as if he’d never stop mourning her because the pain inside him was constant.

The sound of approaching heels brought him back to the fact that Lizzie was meeting him here. She set a handful of assorted coins down in the ashtray. “I've wrapped all Charlie's presents and left them in the room.”

He nodded before asking. “What did I get him?”

“Toy horses, toy cars, toy guns.” Of course, she bought Charlie guns. He’d promised Grace that Charlie would never see a gun and here she was giving him a gun on ‘his’ behalf. “You're due at the Singer factory at eight tomorrow, not eight thirty, there's a union problem.”

She set down the stack of papers at the table. He nodded in acknowledgment. He wanted her to just go away. “Righty-oh.”

“And the driver will take you home.”

“I'll drive meself. Goodnight Lizzie, have a good Christmas.”

She wasn’t going to go. He hadn’t f**ked her in a while and it irritated her, he could see it in her eyes. Lizzie got attached. It was always best to keep her at bay on occasion. Unfortunately for him a waiter passed by and she stated. “I'll have a vodka tonic.”

“Yes, ma'am.”

He closed his eyes as she sat down at his table and helped herself to his cigarettes. God, he did now want to hear this. “Tommy, I've had Christmas cards from John, Arthur, Ada, Michael and Polly. And an invitation, New Year's. Party at John's house. A party at John's big house, good for him. Ada's coming back from Boston for it.”

“I know.” He said as he lifted the cigarette to his lips. “It was me who gave her the time off.”

“Why don't you come? Just turn up, bring Charlie.” There was a brilliant idea. “Bring a lump of coal, first footing. Dark-haired man crosses the threshold to bring good luck for the New Year. Hm?” he turned away from her. “The babies will make everybody okay, babies stop everything. Can't pull a razor with a baby there, not even Esme.” He couldn’t do that. He’d ruined their lives and he wasn’t going to ruin their Christmas as well. They hated him. They hated him before when they thought that he’d betrayed Freddie, but this hate…it wasn’t going to go anywhere. They wanted an apology and he couldn’t offer them one. He’d never apologize for protecting his son. “Just come. See what happens. Tommy, you've never even seen Arthur's kid,” he exhaled deeply. “nor John and Esme's.”

At that moment, Billy turned up. “Your drink, madam.”

“Thank you.”

That was the moment, he figured out how to get rid of Lizzie. “Billy...who did you get for me?”

Billy glanced uneasily at Lizzie who dropped her gaze to hide the hurt in her eyes. She could pretend all she wanted, but he knew. Billy leaned forward and whispered discreetly in his ear. “Theresa.”

He remembered her. He shot Billy a look as he reminded him. “I said someone new.”

Billy nodded apologetically. “Understood.”

Billy scurried away. Lizzie down her drink, fury on her face as she snapped at him. “Do it for Charlie! Charlie should know his cousins.”

She wasn’t his wife. She was his secretary. So he was going to put her back in place. “I'll get Charlie a real horse, Lizzie. Not a toy, a thoroughbred.”

She just shot him another look of disappointment. “And on Christmas day it'll be just you and Charlie.”

“And the horse.” He added.

She shook her head before stating. “Can't live like this another year.”

How would she know? He’d been living like this for years. “Sex, freedom, whiskey sours. Which one should I give up first, Lizzie, eh?” she finally stood up, ready to leave. “I got you something.” She paused, her expression hopeful for a second. But no, that wasn’t what he was doing. He handed her a roll of money, just like he used to in the olden days when she was his prize whore. She shot him a look of disgust, but she took it from him like she always did. As she stomped away, he said quietly. “Merry Christmas.”

She didn’t hear him and that was well. There was nothing merry about Christmas. There was no reason to be merry about life at all. Once he finished his whiskey sour, he was going to go up to his room, wash his face, get out of his clothes and f**k that whore till she was raw and aching.

---

God, she couldn’t believe she was doing this. She inhaled as she stood there, facing forward as the man surveyed her. He walked around her and humiliation burned Kate’s cheeks. She didn’t want to do this, but she didn’t have a choice. She’d been trying for months to find a job. Tomorrow, she was getting thrown out on the street, at least that’s what was going to happen if she didn’t cough up twenty pounds. That wouldn’t have bothered her, but she had a little sister to support. That left Kate with the only option she had left. 

To sell herself. 

Theresa overhearing her plight had taken her down to her place of ‘work’ today, saying that extra girls were always needed during the holidays. “No.” The man in charge of all the whores said. “Can’t use her.”

Kate exhaled in a combination of despair, shock and relief. She’d stripped down to her underwear only to get rejected as a whore?! “Why not?” Theresa asked. “Look at her! She’s a beauty! You know the men’ll go for her, especially with that hair!”

“Yeah, they will. But it’s those eyes of hers, there’s a fight in them. First man that gets rough, she’ll fight back.” He grinned at her with those dirty, tobacco stained teeth of his. “Won’t you?”

she exhaled as she stated. “I’m not in a position to fight back.” But deep inside, she knew that he was right. She’d probably fight if someone got too rough with her.

“She’s got a kid sister to feed.” Theresa added on her behalf. “If she don’t come back with some money by tomorrow. Come on. Just give her a shot. It’s Christmas.”

“I don’t give a f**k about Christmas.” He snapped. “A girl like her ain’t f**king meant for the likes of here.”

At that moment, a man in an immaculate suit came through wearing white gloves. He cleared his throat as he stated. “Excuse me, Theresa, there’s been a change of plans.”

She glowered at him. “What’s that mean Billy?”

“Mr. Shelby, he’s requested someone new.” This Billy exhaled apologetically. “And, you’re not new.”

“F**k!” Theresa said. “He’s a good paying customer!”

the man looked at her and Kate shifted. “You. What’s your name?”

she blinked. “K-Kate.”

The man nodded and said. “Send her.”

Kate’s heart jumped in her chest at those words. “No.” The man said. “Not her. She’s new and---

“That’s exactly what Mr. Shelby requested. He wants someone new.” The man walked around her, surveying her as if she were a prize horse. “He’ll like her. Get her cleaned up and hurry. He doesn’t want to be kept waiting.”

The other man groaned. “Alright fine!” Kate’s jaw dropped. Was this happening? Was she really doing this? “Theresa! Get her ready! You know what Mr. Shelby likes. Make sure that she knows what she’s doing!”

“Alright!” Theresa grabbed her arm and dragged her down the hall. “Go in here,” she opened a door to reveal a bathroom. “get the bath water running and I’ll loan you something of mine to wear. Mr. Shelby doesn’t like cheap, but he doesn’t tear clothes, so I can loan you something  from France. We have to hurry. He doesn’t like to be kept waiting and stay as natural as you can. He doesn’t like too much makeup.”

With that, Theresa slammed the door leaving Kate standing by the tub wondering if she was really going to do this. Did she really had it in her to lay down and let a man that she didn’t know or love just f**k her? In the end, it didn’t matter. She had a little sister that she needed to take care of and right now, this was the only way that she could take care of her.
Kate turned on the bath water, stepped out of her garments and got into the bath water, mentally preparing to get into bed with Mr. Thomas Shelby. Whoever the hell he was.

Chapter 2: The whore named Kate

Where the f**k was that f**king whore!? He was definitely having a word about this to Billy afterward! He did NOT like to be kept waiting. Billy came back and said that he’d found a new girl. A girl named Kate and that she was getting ready. He’d ordered another whiskey before going up to his suite. Upon entering, he’d drawn the curtains and made sure that the only lights on were on the bedside tables and in the far corner. He then went, washed his face, got out of all of his clothes and waited in the bed for her.

He’d been waiting for fifteen f**king minutes.

He leaned over and picked up the phone, preparing to dial downstairs and talk to Billy when someone knocked on the door. He paused. “Come in.”

The door opened and someone said. “Mr. Shelby?”

It was finally her. He exhaled and hung up the phone. “Come in.” The door closed and for a moment, there were no footsteps. He shook his head. “In the bedroom.” She wasn’t getting a very big tip, no matter how good the f**k was.

She rounded the corner and he sized her up for a moment. She was a very beautiful girl, rich mahogany hair, rosy skin, but if he was being honest, it was her eyes that he found intriguing. She licked her lips as she approached. “I’m s-sorry I’m late Mr. Shelby.” She set down her purse on the table and began to unbutton her simple black dress. “There was a problem finding me something to wear. So, I’m to offer you a 10 pound discount, if that’s acceptable to you.”

He nods. “It is.” 

He watched her as she got out of her dress. She folded it methodically and set it on the table before stepping out of her black shoes. His brow arched as he watched her get out of her clothes. It wasn’t a strip tease, it was almost as if, she hadn’t done this before. Her breathing was slightly elevated and her cheeks were getting redder by the second. A less observant man wouldn’t have noticed, but he was observant. She wore a black slip that left her breasts visible to his eyes as well as her feminine entrance.

She started to get into the bed when he cut her off. “Remove that.”

She blinked. “I’m sorry?”

“I want you naked.” He typically didn’t as a rule, but she was unique and her choice in undergarments were intriguing. They implied modesty, while exposing all the ‘naughty’ bits of a woman.

Her eyes flashed for a moment, but something, caused her to nod and tamp down that flash of irritation. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.”

This time, she did sorta strip. She stood there and removed one shoulder strap at a time. She then eased the top down over her breasts, which were perfectly full and perky. Her nipples were fully erect and flaunting themselves in his face. She then shimmied her dress down her slim and tapered waist, pausing as she eased them over her curvy hips. He sat up, feeling himself get aroused as she stepped out of her slip. She turned for a brief second, allowing him a view of her from the back as she set her slip on the nightstand. She was absolutely glorious to behold.

As if sensing his eyes on her, she turned and peered over her shoulder at him. That was enough for him. “Get in the bed.” He ordered.

She nodded and swallowed. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.” 

He removed his reading glasses. He was going to f**k her and he was going to f**k her hard. The last thing that he needed was his glasses getting lost and broken in the sheets. As he turned back from setting them on the nightstand, she was crawling towards him. Not seductively, because it was pretty obvious at least to him that she’d never done that before in her life. Still, he let her do it because he was curious. She inhaled as she crawled till they were knee to knee with each other. Then, she rose up like a cat and wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

That was the moment he knew. No whore ever did this. No whore ever offered warmth or human contact like this. He studied her as she inhaled uneasily, clearly unsure but still trying to offer him something. When she leaned forward, he asked her. “You ever done this before? F**ked a man?”

She went stiff for a moment before croaking out. “Yes.” He arched a brow and looked at her. She let out a sigh before confessing. “Well…it’s my first time doing it for money.” Ah, that made sense. He nodded. Oh well, he asked for something new and he was getting just that. “Am I doing something wrong, Mr. Shelby?” he nearly laughed at that question. She was doing everything f**king wrong! “It’s been a few years and I-I can’t afford to lose this job. Not on the first day.”

She was desperate. She didn’t want to do this, but she needed to make a living, stay alive and she probably had someone depending on her. Had to be family because that was the only thing that’d make a good girl like her get into a profession like this. 

He shook his head. “No, you’re doing alright. However,” he grabbed her around the waist and flipped her onto her back. She gasped and looked up at him with those green eyes of hers wide and curious. “I think it’s best that I take charge for a minute or two. I doubt….any of your other clients will be as helpful in the future.”

She nodded and exhaled, a faint smile of relief on her face. “Thank you, Mr. Shelby.”

Yeah, she had no idea what she was doing. A few years was a lifetime to a good girl. He spread her legs open for him and she blushed. God help him, she actually blushed like a f**king virgin! He thought about grabbing a rubber, but, it was obvious that she was clean and he wanted to come in her without any protection. Might knock her up, but he didn’t care. She inhaled as she ran her trembling hands up his forearms to his shoulders. He slipped a finger into her, taking a moment to prepare her.

She gasped at the unexpected intrusion and her nails dug into his back. He glanced down at her and she nodded at him. “I’m sorry. I-I wasn’t expecting---

“Clearly.”

Again, she blushed. “Sorry.”

“Shut up.” She laughed, causing him to question her sanity for a moment. She bit her lip and looked away. He began moving his finger in her, causing her to inhale sharply. “By the way….do you know who I am?”

she inhaled and shifted under him. “T-Thomas Shelby.”

He sped up his thrusts in her, causing her to moan. “Do you know what I do?”

She shook her head. “N-no!”

He found that hard to believe. “How long have you lived in Birmingham?”

“I-I j-just,” she shifted. “please---

“Answer the f**king question!”

“T-two w-weeks.” She tightened her grip on him. “M-Mr. Shelby!” He added a second finger and those green eyes of hers bulged. “Oh God!!”

ok, this was actually getting to be a little fun. He hadn’t had someone this innocent in a long time and she hadn’t even taken his cock yet! Talk about a f**king Christmas present! He kept up his movements, thrusting his fingers deep into her while stroking her clit until her body spasmed and she came all over his hand with a sharp cry! He exhaled sharply. God, she looked spectacular and he was ready. He was hard, he was so f**king hard that he wasn’t sure if she’d be able to take him, but she had to because he’d f**king paid for her!

As he laid down on top of her, preparing to enter her….she caressed his face. That was new…no whore ever touched a man like this. He paused and looked down at her for a moment. She gave him a wobbly smile, clearly thanking him for that orgasm and preparing her body to take his cock. He exhaled as he grabbed ahold of himself and thrust into her tight wetness.

“Oh!!” her eyes bulged as he penetrated her fully. 

“F**k.” He groaned as her tightness threatened to snap him in two. He exhaled roughly as he looked at her. She’d submit and she’d break in the end, like all women did. “You ok?”

why the hell did he ask her that? She was a whore! Didn’t matter if it was her first day on the job and he was her first client. It didn’t f**king matter! Still, she smiled at him, her hand gently caressing his cheekbone before saying. “Yes.”

He had to get back to business. “Ok.”

He withdrew from her and plunged back in, causing her to moan loudly. God, she was worth the f**king wait. He moved slowly at first, waiting for her to loosen up some and get used to this. That’s when he felt her lips on his neck. It was strange to feel that from a whore. He made the mistake of looking at her. That little action…caused their mouths to brush against each others in a soft kiss. She moaned. He paused, his lips resting softly against hers. 

Then, she responded.

She began kissing him as she wound her arm around his shoulder while she ran her other hand through his hair. She used her long nails and that sent a shiver down his back. Something in him broke and he paused mid-f**k to kiss her. She moaned and clutched at him. He needed this so f**king badly. He needed warmth, he needed comfort and he needed to feel human for just one f**king minute.

“Thomas.” She whimpered against his lips. “Thomas!”

Oh, she wasn’t good at this at all. That was the wrong word. She was very good at this, she just wasn’t professional at all. She was too intimate, offering too much of herself and she was going to get hurt by someone. The kisses, even the way she moaned his name wasn’t right. Whores didn’t do that. By all rights, he should stop her from doing this, it’d only hurt her in the end. But at the same time…she felt utterly amazing. She reminded him of Grace, the way she felt with her arms around him. When she ran her hand through his hair, he was a goner. This…he couldn’t do without. Nobody had touched him like this in years and he missed it.

He exhaled roughly as he began moving in her, causing her to inhale. “Say my name.”

At that moment, he saw it occur to her that maybe calling clients by their first names wasn’t right. “Should I---

“Say it.” He ordered, causing those eyes of hers to widen a bit. “Say my f**king name.”

“Thomas.” She kissed him back, causing him to respond. “Thomas please. Oh!” Her reactions were genuine, that’s what made her so enjoyable. She wasn’t used to this, but that’s what was so endearing about her. The innocence, it hadn’t been knocked out of her yet. It would be if she stayed in this life. He saw it happen to Lizzie. It hadn’t happened to her yet and he wanted to preserve that somehow. “Oh, God!”

she tightened her walls on him by pure instinct. God, he could get used to this! “F**k!!” 

“T-Thomas!!!” She wailed. “Oh, God!!”

he kissed her to shut her up. She groaned into his mouth, her lips parting. He slipped his tongue into her mouth. She let out a wail, which escalated into a cry as he began to f**k her and God did he f**k her hard. Her cries were high and he held onto her. Her head shook and bounced with each thrust, her eyes rolled back into her head as if she were going to pass out.

“Look at me!!” He ordered and those eyes of hers widened. He gripped the back of her head, forcing her to maintain eye contact with him. “Good girl.” She got wetter and she clenched tighter onto him at those words. She was close, he could feel it and he was going to enjoy this moment. “Good, look at me when you come.”

“Oh!!” Her nails dug into his back as he came inside her. Her walls tightened around him, causing the feeling to be more exquisite. She was perfect. He came so hard that it was if someone had punched him in the back of the head!

His head dropped forward and he collapsed on top of her, nearly crushing her. She whimpered underneath him and he rolled off of her, carefully pulling out so he didn’t hurt her. For a minute, they both lay there, completely stunned by what they’d both shared together. HE was stunned out of his mind because…you didn’t get this kind of warmth or intimacy from a whore. It was special. She was special.

After a few minutes, she sat up and carefully pushed the covers back. He grabbed her by the arm, causing her to jump a moment. “Stay.” He ordered.

She hesitated and then asked. “Doesn’t that…cost extra?”

He studied her and then asks. “Are you asking for extra?”

She bit her lip and then shook her head. “No, just clarifying.” There’s a moment of silence and then she says. “I’ll stay.”

He exhales and asks. “How much extra are you supposed to charge me?”

“I don’t know.” She shrugged she gets under the covers. “I guess this one’s on the house. Since it’s almost Christmas.”

He shakes his head. “You’re not cut out for this life.”

“Never said I was.”

“Why do it?”

“I need the money. Times are hard, my family’s lost everything and I’ve got a kid sister to support.” He was right. He knew it was because of family. “May I get a glass of water?”

He nods. “Yeah.”

She got out of the bed and hobbled to the bathroom naked. He shook his head before reaching into his nightstand for his wallet. Poor thing, if she thought that’s what a f**k was, was she in for an eye-opener. He had approximately 200 hundred pounds cash on him. Standard fee was 60 pounds a f**k, with a discount of 10 pounds… he could afford to f**k her at least three more times.

He grabbed the phone and called the front desk and asked to speak to Billy. Billy must have been expecting him to call, for he was handed over right away. Yes, Mr. Shelby?

“Kate’s going to be really busy tonight.” He stated calmly. “Make sure that they know not to expect her back until tomorrow.”

Yes, Mr. Shelby!

He hung up. He understood Billy’s surprise, he’d never kept a whore overnight before. But then again…he’d never f**ked Kate before and she was absolutely something different.

---

Chapter 3: Riding Thomas

Kate lay there, the white sheets sticking to her body. She didn’t know how she’d feel after getting f**ked by a stranger, but, she wasn’t expecting to feel alright. A small feeling of guilt and a twinge of dirt after having done that, but, as her body cooled down those feelings faded. She had reached for that slip, but he’d told her. “You won’t be needing that.” He’d lit a cigarette as he calmly said. “I’m not done with you yet.”

She hadn’t been sure how to feel about that. She was a little tired, she hadn’t had sex in years and he clearly had a ton of experience. She was going to be in for a long night, but at 50 pounds a f**k, she got to keep half of it. That paid the rent and left her 5 pounds for groceries. The second round left another 25 pounds for some Christmas gifts for Rosemary and then put her through school. After that, she had to start saving up to pay of that debt of 8,500 pounds. 

She laid down on the satin covers and closed her eyes. Her stomach let out a loud rumble which she hoped had gone unnoticed by him. He let out and exhale and she looked up as he grabbed the phone. She stared at him for a moment. “This is Thomas Shelby. Send up a dinner, a bottle of Irish whiskey and two glasses. Yeah.” He hung up and turned back to his cigarette. “So, for as late as you were…they didn’t give you a f**king sandwich?”

She hadn’t eaten at all today. She couldn’t afford it. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.” He took a few more drags on his cigarette. After a minute of silence, he asked. “So, how’s a girl like you wind up in my bed doing things like that?”

She didn’t want to talk to him, but, he was paying her for her services. He was also buying her something to eat. So, she was obligated to him. She exhaled as she said. “Death. My father died almost two months ago. He was a gambler and I didn’t realize just how much he’d gambled away a debt collector turned up after the funeral to take the house from us.”

“Us?” he inquired.

“I have a sister. She’s going to be thirteen in two months.” He nodded. “Even after the house was sold…we still owed 8,500 pounds. So, I had to move to Birmingham as it was the only place that was cheap enough.”

“Where’d you live before?”

“Oxford.”

He paused, his cigarette to his lips. “That’s nearly 80 miles from here, how’d you get here?”

“We walked.” She said. “People were more than willing to give us ride because I had her with me. I don’t think we walked more than twenty miles.”

“Did you have any money?”

she nodded. “Stole my mother’s jewelry when the debt collector wasn’t looking. Sold it and that kept us afloat. I had just enough to pay for a month at a boarding house at the respectable end of town. But, she told me yesterday that she wants the rent a week early and I couldn’t find a job.”

He frowned. “How come?”

“I didn’t have any references. I tried as a shop girl, seamstress even a barmaid. Bartender turned my hands over and said I never did a day’s work in my life.” She shook her head as she said. “Perhaps I didn’t do any real work, but my father was a teacher. My mother died giving birth to Rosemary when I was seventeen, so, someone had to take care of the house. Dad drank a lot for the first year and it was hard taking care of the house. The war didn’t help things any.” She exhaled as she said. “I couldn’t join up or work in a factory because Rosemary was too young. We had a big house, so I let mother’s drop their kids off at the house. The older kids would help me babysit them. We had such a big house that we could hold over fifty kids. They’d pick them all up in the evening afterwards.”

“Did you charge them?”

she frowned. “No.”

He shook his head. “You should have.”

“They were serving their country. I was doing my bit by making sure they got to keep doing it. I wasn't taking advantage of it.”
“Money might have come in handy by now.” He shook his head before looking at her. “This was really, the only job you can get?”

she nodded before admitting. “Nearly didn’t get this one.”

He choked on his cigarette. “What? Why the f**k not?”

“Apparently, he thought I'd fight.” He exhaled deeply before reaching over and gripping her by the chin and forcing her to look at him. “What?”

he said nothing as he studied her. “Yeah. You’d fight. But, you’ve got a kid sister, so, yeah, you'd fight to protect yourself if you had to. Might want to find someone who’d give you better protection.”

“Considering how he didn’t want to hire me, Mr. Shelby. I doubt I’m in any position to go begging that someone else hire me.” She pointed out. “The only reason I’m here, is because your man thought you’d like me.”

He nodded simply before asking her. “Ready to go again?”

She blinked. “I guess.”

He released her chin and then put out his cigarette. She inhaled, mentally readying herself to get her insides pounded out of her again. He liked it deep and a little rough. Well, it had been ten years, so, maybe she was out of practice. “Get the f**k over here.” No, it was him. 

She inhaled as he pulled her onto him. As she straddled him, she asked. “Do you, want me on top of you?”

He nods. “Yeah. You’ll earn yourself another fifty tonight. Lift your hips.” She did as he said. He obviously had a ton of experience compared to her, so she’d earn it. She did as he said. She inhaled sharply as he filled her. He didn’t give her a moment to adjust. He kept pulling her down until her body had swallowed him whole. He nodded, those blue eyes spared dangerously as he ordered. “F**k me good.”

She inhaled as she nodded. “Yes, Thomas.” 

She began moving on top of him, her body growing warm and slick as she began to grow familiar with the movement. The whole time, he laid back and looked at her. She hated the way he looked at her sometimes, she could feel herself growing warm all over. Theresa had said that Thomas Shelby was a man not to be coddled. To keep things simple, straightforward and not overly intimate. She’d been wrong. Thomas was a broken man who was all alone in this world. And people who were broken, they wanted to be held. She knew that because she was broken. There was a deep loss and sadness in his eyes. He’d lost someone that he loved deeply and he’d never recovered from that. She’d never recovered from that either. God, John was probably looking down at her wondering how he’d ever been engaged to a girl like her.

“Who was the last man?” Thomas asked underneath her, drawing her back to him.

“Hmm?” she inquired, even though she knew the question.

“The last man you f**ked.” He asked as he tightened his grip on her hips. “You’re not a virgin, so, who was it?”

God, he had a cruel streak. She bit her lip before confessing. “My fiancé.”

He began circling her hips, causing her to inhale as he brushed her clit. “What happened to him?”

She didn’t want to talk about this. But she had to. “He died.” She whispered. “Battle of Mons.”

“Battle of Mons.” His brow arched as he said. “I was there.”

She didn’t want to hear that. She didn’t want to think about John, not while she was naked and f**king one of his fellow soldiers. “Please,” she half begged. “I don’t want to talk about that.”

He seemed to understand, for he nodded. “Alright.” She closed her eyes and took a moment to compose herself. God, she hadn’t thought about John that way in a while. Now, he’d brought all of that back to her and she felt horrible. He sat up and she wrapped her arms around his neck. She could bury her face on his shoulder and he wouldn’t see her pain. But he didn’t allow that. He grabbed her bay her hair and forced her to look at him. “Tell me,” he ordered. “how it feels when a good girl like you, gets f**ked by a bad man like me?”

Cheap. “I shouldn’t.” He smacked her arse hard with an open hand, causing her to jump and cry out as she clenched tighter around his cock. “Oh!”

“Tell me,” he repeated firmly. “how much you like it.”

“I like it.” She understood what he wanted from her. “Mhmm, you feel so good, Thomas.”

“How good?” He rasped as he thrust harder into her.

“Ah! Like,” her brain scrambled for words as she said. “like, I’m gonna die.” And she was, her heart was breaking right now. She didn’t stop, she kept riding him as she chanted his name. “Thomas. Thomas. Oh!”

he opened his mouth and she just kissed him. She was sick of his commands. He was trying to f**k John out of her head right now, but his words still made her feel like the whore she was. She hadn’t felt like a whore before this. Now she did. He responded by wrapping his arms around her and f**king her harder on his cock. She wrapped her arms around him, pressing her breasts against his bare chest while rocking her hips until they found their release together. Strange, how it was always together.

They sat there in that position, like two statues that had been carved together for all of eternity. She inhaled deeply as his fingers curled into her back. There were these strange little moments between them that made her question her reality on occasion. She didn’t know what they were. He inhaled deeply and she realized that he had his face buried in her neck. So, he was smelling her hair. She turned towards him and again their noses brushed.

Knock, knock, knock!

She jumped and practically jumped off his lap to cover herself with the sheet. He shook his head as he got out of the bed. “Are you in the wrong f**king business, eh?” she covered her face in embarrassment as she realized what she’d done. She was a whore now. Her body was available for everyone, so, what did it matter who saw her naked? Mr. Shelby pulled his shorts up around his waist and left the room.

He came back with a cart of food and her stomach growled. She sat up in the bed as he handed her plate. “Eat. We’re not done yet.” Good God! How much stamina did this man have!? Theresa said it’d be ONE f**k and that was all. But, he was going on round three tonight?! She stared at him in shock. “What?”

“T-that’s…150 pounds, Mr. Shelby.”

He nods. “I know. I can afford you.” He opens the bottle of whiskey and pours two glasses of whiskey. He hands one to her. “I already told them not to expect you till tomorrow morning, so, we’ve got the room for the night.”

She wasn’t sure if she liked that. She bit her lip. “I can’t stay that late, I have a sister---

“Call the boarding house.” He said. “Tell the housekeeper you found a job and Thomas Shelby is using you for a task at the moment.”

God, that was beyond dirty. She shook her head as she called the boarding house. Mrs. Green was skeptical, until she mentioned Thomas Shelby. Mrs. Green’s tone changed and she assured her that Rosemary would be alright and that she could be a few days late with the rent as well. That…was a surprise to her. She looked at Thomas, who looked harmless as he sat there drinking his whiskey, but she now knew better. He wasn’t harmless.

She hesitated before asking. “Do you know Mrs. Green?”

“No. But she knows me.” She opened her mouth to ask more, but he said. “Eat.”

She decided not to ask anymore. She was his whore for the evening and he was still going to use her. She needed her strength. There was roast turkey with gravy, roasted potatoes, buttered asparagus with revolting mushrooms. A buttered roll, with cheese and also a slice of cherry pie. Her stomach growled again, so she began to eat everything but the mushrooms. The pie she put to the side, in case he got hungry later on in the evening or if she needed a sugar buzz.

As she set the pie on the nightstand after finishing her dinner, he said. “I have a business proposition for you. Are you interested?”

She frowned. “Possibly. What is it?”

He looked at her as he twirled his cigarette in his hand. “You said, you owe 8,500 pounds. That right?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“That means…you’d have to f**k over 150 men to pay that off.” God, when he said that it made her feel so dirty and disgusting. She’d NEVER be able to hold her head in public after that. She’d NEVER be able to get married because no man would want her. “Or…you can f**k me 150 times instead.”

Her brain shorted out at those words. “What?”

He looked at her as he handed her a card. “There’s my place of business. If you agree, I’ll pay off your debt to the creditors.” She gasped in shock. “Every f**king penny.” He studied her as he declared. “But you will pay me back by earning your keep by opening your legs for me whenever I f**king want.”

She had a very bad feeling that she was about to make a dangerous deal that was going to change her life forever.

Chapter 4: F**king Kate

Kate stared at him as if he’d lost his mind and frankly, he wasn’t sure that he hadn’t. That was quite an expense he was taking on himself. Her debt wasn’t too bad, but he’d want her close which meant moving her into the house so he could f**k her at leisure. She had a kid sister, so she’d have to come as well. She’d want the kid to go school, so that’d be another thing that he’d have to take care of. She wasn’t experienced like Lizzie was, but she felt good. She was a delight to f**k. His innocent little ‘whore’ could actually blush like a f**king virgin. The whimpers he rung from her as he forced her compliant body all the way down on his cock had been utterly delightful. It had been too long, too long since had an enjoyable experience like this with a woman and if he had to pay for it, so be it!

She was clean, so he didn’t have to f**k her with rubbers. She was ashamed of how low she’d fallen, so she wasn’t likely to tell people as to what he was doing to her. He could do whatever the hell he wanted to her and she’d allow it. She had no family apart from her sister and no thirteen year old child was going to stop him from f**king Kate every damn day for six months straight. If he f**ked a child into her, who cared? She wasn’t the kind of woman who’d demand marriage. Besides, like him she’d loved and lost. He didn’t know who the soldier was who’d died, but she hadn’t stopped loving that man the way he hadn’t stopped loving Grace. They were of mutual benefit to each other. She could use him for his money and he was going to use her for her body. By God as he going to use that body well.

She stared at him for a moment before asking. “Why would you do that, Mr. Shelby?”

“Do what?”

“Offer me a job as your full-time whore?” she inquired. “I can tell from the way that you,” words failed her for a moment as se looked for the ‘proper’ ladylike words to describe this situation. However, there weren’t really any. “well, the way that you’re… inside me that…you’ve a lot of experience.”

“And?”

she exhaled sharply. “Well, Mr. Shelby, I cannot possibly satisfy you to the extent that you wish to employ me on such a basis!”

he reached for another cigarette and lit it. “Do I look like a man, who throws away good money?”

she shot him a look. “I don’t know a damn thing about you other than you’re a dangerous man who’s used to getting his way with the snap of his fingers.” He glanced at her. She lay there, naked, her body glistening from sweat as she was unused to being used like this. Poor thing, he was still planning on f**king her twice more. He only had enough money for one more, but, he figured he could ring one more f**k out of her on the house. Especially with it being Christmas and all. “Not sure why you’d pick me.”

“That, is my business.” He stated.

“No.” She said firmly “It’s not.” Oh, ho. She was spicy as f**k. He turned and looked at her. She had her chin tilted upwards, not a trace of fear in those green eyes of hers. “I’m not a fool. I know I’m not good at this ‘job’ and you’re doing all the work. By all accounts, I should be paying you for teaching me what to do!” he shook his head and looked away before he smiled. She did have a point there. “Which frankly, I think that’s why you’re keeping me here instead of going home to your family. Because you think I won’t be able to handle whatever it is those,” she paused and she swallowed bitterly. “men are going to do to me during my employ.”

He shook his head. “No, I’m not.”

“Why?”

“Because,” he exhaled as he racked his brain for an answer. Fortunately, one came to his mind quickly. “you won’t last a week as a whore.” She snorted at him. “I’m serious.”

“You bastard,” she mumbled.

Good, she was angry. That made her easy to manipulate. But he had to knock that anger out of her quick. “That fiancé of yours?” she instantly went stiff. “What was his name?”

She was silent a moment before stating quietly. “John Carter. He was a doctor.”

He nodded before asking her simply. “And that doctor of yours…ever undo his trousers and make you take his cock in your mouth.”

As he thought, she got angry and embarrassed. “Excuse me??”

“You’ll be asked to do that.” He stated. “My thought is…you’re too f**king soft for this life. Whoring…it’s a rough life and the men down here are bad. You said I’m dangerous, yeah, you’d be right about that. The difference between me and the other men are I have two sisters. My aunt and mother raised me.” He held her gaze as he said. “So I’m not the kind of man who’d hurt you.”

She studied him before stating. “You’d just f**k me.”

“Yeah, I would.” He nodded and she rolled her eyes in disgust. She was funny. He’d never had a woman like her throw back such sass at him. The fact that she was stripped naked and been f**ked twice had done nothing to diminish the fire in her. She was a curiosity. “And I'd f**k you well, every day.”

“God,” she shook her head as she turned red. “you have no shame.”

“No. None.” He shook his head before he stated. “But it’d be better for you if you let me f**k you than them. Like I asked, you ever have your boyfriend put his cock in your mouth?”

she glowered at him. “No, but I won’t---

“You don’t have a f**king choice.” He stated darkly, causing her to still. “If a man decides he wants to see you choke on his cock and swallow his seed, then you’ll f**king do it!” she went a shade of white and he knew he was striking fear in her heart.

“Or, maybe he can’t get hard and he wants you to get him hard by sucking him off!”

“Mr. Shelby---

“Ever take anything up your ass?” 

Her eyes widened and her hand swung freely. She struck him upside the cheek as she spat. “Stop it!”

He shook his head. “Yeah, it don’t work like that in bed with a men over there. You do that to someone other than me…and this is what’ll happen.”

She frowned. “What---

He grabbed her by her arms and pushed her on her stomach, which instantly caused her to start screaming. She tried fighting, but he easily overpowered her. She didn’t stop fighting, which he had to admit he found impressive. She managed to elbow him in the stomach once. He shook his head before pinning her in place with one hand behind her back. “There are dozens of things that men like that I know for a fact, that you’d hate.”

“Mr. Shelby,” he ignored her protests. She needed to know this. “please, don’t.”

“I personally, don’t like this position.” He stated as he ran his hand down her hip to caress her back. She shivered as his hand traveled downwards towards her rear entrance. “So, you’d never have to worry about this when you’re with me.”

She instantly realized what was happening, for she started wriggling and squirming! “No!! Mr. Shelby, don’t!!” he ignored her as he pushed his thumb in and she let out a shriek. “ah!! Please, stop!!”

he did pause, but he left his thumb just inside her so she’d get an idea. “If you tell a man to stop…they won’t. Men get excited by that. They won’t stop. They’ll do more and they’ll push harder and harder. If you cry, that only makes it better.” She was trembling, but she’d gone loose under him. That was good. He had her right where he wanted her. Afraid and terrified. He withdrew his thumb from her, carefully massaging her hip to loosen her up. She exhaled in relief as she trembled. “Some men…like to put things in a woman when they f**k them, like bottles.” She let out a whimper and her whole body went tight. He flipped her on her back so that he was straddling her. She stared up at him, terror in her eyes and he knew that he’d won. “If your guard doesn’t take care of you, there could be weapons brought in the room. He’d be f**king you while there’s a gun shoved---

“Enough, you made your point!” she exhaled as she covered her face with shaking hands. “God!”

after a moment he added. “Me, you already know. So, you wouldn’t be in any danger and you’d be free to go after you paid me back.” She let out a sigh and sat up. “I’m also clean, so, you don’t have to worry about me passing you the clap or anything like that.”

“I said enough! God!” she ran her hand through her mahogany hair. “You don’t know when to quit!” He knew he could have stopped a while ago. She exhaled before stating. “I need…a moment to think about this. Alright?”

he nods. “Alright. You’ve got my card with my address. Be there at 8:45 if you decide to do it. Alright?”

she nods. “Yes Mr. Shelby.”

“Good.” He looked her up and down before asking her. “You ready to go again?”

she let out a sharp exhale. “God!”

“Well?”

she was still tired, he could tell but she nodded anyway. “Yes. H-how do you want me?”

he studied her and then stated. “On your knees.” She looked uneasy for a moment, so he added. “I’m not taking your arse. You’re alright, so, get over here.”

She inhaled before crawling towards him. She licked her lips uneasily as he wrapped his arm around her waist. God, he was never, going to get tired of f**king her. He pushed her shoulders down, causing her to inhale sharply as he braced his other hand on the bedframe. He inhaled before thrusting into her and she wailed as he pulled her under him. She inhaled sharply as she whined “Oh God!”

“You alright?” she could only nod. “It hurt?” she shook her head that it didn’t. “What’s it feel like?”

“i-i think,” she swallowed. “y-you’re gonna rip me open.”

“No,” he shook his head. “good girls like you were made for this with a man like me.” She moaned and got wetter. He chuckled. “F**k, you like it when I call you that. Hold on, because I’m going to teach you a thing or two.” 

And with that, he f**ked her hard into the mattress till she was sobbing. He should have eased up on her, but he didn’t. He wanted her and he wanted to use her. Right before she came, he grabbed her back the back of her hair and pulled her head back as she screamed before she came. Her head dropped forward and her entire body went limp like she passed out. 
After pulling himself free from her, he rolled her onto her back. She lay there, her breasts heaving as tears of pleasure ran down her cheeks. He checked her pulse and she was fine, her heart was good but she was just tired and teetering on the edge of reality. She was so f**king good. After putting her limp body where he wanted her, he reached over and grabbed his tie. She was so exhausted that she was unaware as he tied her hands above her head. She moaned and her head lolled to her side and she closed her eyes.  She looked perfect with her hands tied above her head and her legs were splayed open. He discreetly checked on her. Her thighs were red and coated with white fluids, but he hadn’t injured her.

He poured himself a drink and then went to his coat. He had a little bit of cocaine left and he took a stiff. Kate, she stayed limp and tired while he charged up again. After taking the sniff of cocaine, he grabbed the whiskey and took a long drink. The room spun around him, but he felt the energy surging through him. He looked down at Kate’s picture perfect naked body and refilled his glass. He held the whiskey up to her lips and she sipped at it. Then when she realized that she was thirsty, she greedily slurped it down. Her fingers dug into the tie and her eyes fluttered open as she realized what he’d done to her. 

“W-what?” she inhaled. “What’s happening---

“Keep your legs closed,” he advised. “I want you tight for this.”

“But---

He slipped two fingers in her, causing her to cry out as she could barely take them. F**king hell, she was tight! “That’s all you need to worry about. Do you understand?”

she nodded. “Yes. Yes, Tommy.” 

“Good.” He held her gaze as he ordered. “Now shut up and let me f**k you.”

She did and everything after became a haze, but a very pleasant haze nonetheless and for the first time in a long time. His dreams were peaceful.

---

Kate inhaled as she walked up to the Shelby Company Limited building. She felt dirty, cheap and used, but she had more than 80 pounds in her wallet thanks to Mr. Shelby f**king her nearly senseless last night. She was so freaking sore that it took all her willpower not to press some snow between her legs for relief! It felt as if everyone knew that he’d taken her and used her yesterday as she approached the office. She could swear that all the men were watching her and wondering how they could get their hands on her next . She didn’t know why people were here, it was Christmas Eve after all. 

“What are we doing here?” Rosemary asked loudly. “It’s dirty.”

“I know.” She inhaled as she entered the building. It was clean and very respectable looking. There was a woman at the desk, getting ready to leave and Kate walked up to her. “Is Mr. Shelby in?”

“What do you want with him?” The dark haired woman asked as she sized Kate up.

She inhaled as she said. “I had business with Mr. Shelby yesterday. He offered me a job and he told me to be here at this time to discuss details if I were so inclined to accept it.”

“And what offer was that?”

she exhaled as she said politely. “That’s between Mr. Shelby and me.”

She studied her and asked. “What’s your name?”

“Miss Katherine Carter.”

The woman shot her a look of disgust before walking over to the office and knocking on the glass door before opening it. “Mr. Shelby, there’s a woman here to see you.”

“Send her in.”

She turned to Rosemary and said. “Wait out here, I won’t be long.”

“Ok!”

She inhaled, her heart pounding in her throat and her vagina began throbbing as she entered the room. Never in a million years did she think that she’d accept his offer, but a knife being held to her throat early this morning made her change her mind. Mr. Shelby looked up from his desk with his glasses on his face.

She inhaled as she said. “Mr. Shelby, I-I decided to accept your offer.”

He frowned. “My what?”

Now, she was confused. “Your job offer.” She stepped closer to his desk as she lowered her voice. “You…offered to pay off my debt if…I were to be your whore exclusively until I paid you back.”

He stared at her before stating. “Look…I got high. I don’t remember what was said after the second f**k.”

This…was going to be embarrassing as hell.

Chapter 5: The deal

Her face was priceless. He did remember everything, but he wanted to know if she was a liar or not. He suspected that she was honest, but if he was going to bring her into his house and f**k her with Charlie just down the hall, he needed to know that he could trust her. 

She inhaled as she said. “Well, this is awkward. Uhm…after we were together the second time…you bought me dinner.”

“I did?”

She nodded. “Yes, Mr. Shelby. You did.”

He folded his hands and stared her down before stating coldly. “My wallet was uncharacteristically short when I woke up this morning.”

She shook her head and crossed her arms. “That, would be your fault, not mine Mr. Shelby.”

“Really?” he tilted his head as he stood up and moved towards her. “Because as near as I know, two f**ks, a dinner and two whiskeys, don’t use up over two hundred pounds.”

“No,” she croaked as she actually blushed. Good grief! He’d f**ked her five times last night! How the hell could she still be blushing?? “Mr. Shelby…that wouldn’t. But…it was five, not two.”

He frowned. “Five what?”

“We,” she was still blushing as she rubbed her neck in embarrassment! “were together…five times last night.”

He crossed his arms as he said. “Five?”

“Yes, Sir.”

He looked her top to bottom slowly, causing her to shift in discomfort. He shook his head. “You were good…but not so much for five times.”

“That’s what I said.” She said quietly. “You didn’t have enough for to pay for the fifth, so…I threw the fifth in for free.”

He nodded. “Generous of you.” She was honest. She stuck to the story so far. He cleared his throat before asking. “So, what was this deal I offered you again?”

She cleared her throat as she stepped forward with some papers that were inside her purse. “This is the agency I mentioned. As you can see, I owe them 8,500 pounds.” He took the papers and scanned them. He knew the name, knew the collector. He’d used him himself on occasion. So, he knew it was legitimate. She wasn’t scamming him. She exhaled deeply as she continued. “You offered to pay off the debt,” he glanced up at her and she didn’t even flinch. “if I…continued to let you use me till I repaid the money I owed you back in full.”

He studied her a while before asking. “What made you come to my office with this deal? You’d pay a sum like this much quicker with multiple men f**king you at 60 pounds an hour instead of me f**king you a few times a day.”

She exhaled deeply before saying in a soft voice. “Agreed, but…you were right.” He caught that tone in her voice. Something happened. “It’s much safer with you and with Rosemary…I can’t take any risks.”

“What happened?” he asked.

Her eyes narrowed. “Why?”

“Because whatever happened, drove you to me. So, you tell me what happened.” She exhaled a moment and he saw that she was blinking back tears. “Did someone hurt you?”

she bit her lip a moment before nodding. “Yes.”

He stepped towards her and said. “Show me.” When she hesitated, he exhaled. “I’ve already seen every inch of you. So, show me.”

She hesitated for a brief second more before undoing the first two buttons of her green dress. He moved closer as she moved the dress back to reveal her throat. He didn’t see anything until he got close enough. When he saw the jagged but thin red line at her throat he knew someone had held a knife to her throat while they f**ked her. He’d warned her, but he didn’t think she’d run into that kind of man so soon. “The guard allowed it.” He touched her throat gently, causing her to flinch. She inhaled as she whispered. “Said he was…a special customer.”

“Name?” she blinked in confusion as he repeated. “What was his name?”

she bit her lip and said. “I don’t know. He went by the name Duke, but, that can’t be real.” He released her throat and turned and walked over to his phone. “Mr. Shelby---

“Quiet.” He ordered. He was angry. He was so angry that his blood was boiling. He inhaled as he picked up the phone and called Isaiah. He was in that area.

Hello.

“Isaiah? Got a job for you.”

What is it?

“You know the group that Billy Bannerman supplies to the Midland Hotel?”

Aaron Rundle’s group?

“Yeah.” He turned towards her as he said. “There was a customer there this morning, put a knife to one of the girl’s throat’s while he was f**king her. Cut her pretty good.” She inhaled sharply as she did up the button on her dress. “You know what to do.”

Got a name?

“Goes by the name of Duke.” He stated. “Apparently, he’s a special customer and they let him do as he wish. Find out.” He held her gaze as he stated. “And if Rundle doesn’t talk, burn the place down with him and his men in it. Make sure the girls are out.”

Right away Mr. Shelby.

He hung up the phone and looked at a stunned Kate. “Well, that’s taken care of. He won’t be doing that to anymore girls.”

She stared at him before asking. “Is it…really that easy for you to order that a man’s life be taken?”

“And if he had slit your throat, would you have minded?” he inquired. She exhaled and rolled her eyes. “No. You may not like it, but you know it’s not going to bother you tonight to know that he’s dead, not putting others under the knife like that.”

She was silent a moment before nodding. After a moment, she said. “I couldn’t get him off me.”

“You tried.” He said. “I’ve no doubt…that you gave him a proper fight before he pulled out the knife.”

She bit her lip before stating. “Yes.” She hesitated before asking. “You don’t like knives…or anything like that, right?”

“No.” He shook his head as he said. “Whatever I did with you during those five times, that’s what I prefer to do. Can you handle it?”

after a moment of thinking, she nodded. “Yes.”

“Right.” He moved to sit back at his desk. “Sit down, let’s discuss the specifics.” He gestured for her to sit opposite him. He lit a cigarette and she sat down, rebuttoning her dress back up. “So, your debt will be paid off within the hour.” The tension that she didn’t know that she was carrying fell off her shoulders. “Now, both of us will have a book to keep track of how many times a day I f**k you.” She nodded and he could see from the way her chin was tilted that she disapproved of the way he discussed this so straightforward. She may have been employed as a whore when they met and she was going to be his whore for months, but she was a lady. That was obvious. She belonged with the likes of May Carlton. “Now, if I were paying you 50 pounds a f**k, I’d get to f**k you…160 times before you paid me back.”

“154.” He shot her a look. “Five at the---

“I only remember two.” He stated.

She inhaled. “I wouldn’t lie---

“I don’t know if you would or wouldn’t lie. But let’s say it was three.” He stated. “Besides, I just arranged to have the man who cut your throat chopped up and thrown into the cut. You will, give me a little leeway.”

She exhaled reluctantly and nodded. “Agreed.”

“Don’t worry. It’s Christmas Eve…you’ll earn your money’s worth tonight.”

She cleared her throat. “When do you want me to start? I have to make accommodations for myself and my sister that are closer---

“Like I said, if I were paying you 50 pounds a f**k. I’m not paying you that much.”

Her jaw dropped. “Excuse me?”

“It’ll be 35 pounds a f**k.” She let out a shout of outrage as she jumped to her feet. he held up a hand. “Here’s why. You and your sister will move into my house.” Her eyes widened in shock. “You, will spend your nights in my bed and I can f**k you any time I want during the day. Your sister, will have accommodations in a guest room that’s just down the hall next to my boy.” 

“Mr. Shelby,” she inhaled. “that’ll take forever to pay off---

“I’m covering your room, board and several tutors for your sister. I think, you’ll find that’s very generous.”

She bit her lip before stating. “Mr. Shelby, that is very well, but…you’re not leaving me in a very good position for when I leave you.”

He hadn’t thought about that. “Fair point.” He looked at her and asked. “At  35 pounds a f**k, how many times do I have to f**k you before you’ve paid me back?”

She inhaled as she bit out. “35 times 243 is 8,505 pounds.”

He nods, a gleam of pleasure started burning in his stomach as he asked. “Right. Quite a bit more than the 150 we originally estimated.”

She nodded tightly. “Clearly.”

He was thrilled. He studied her and asked. “Since you’re good with numbers, what’s 243 times 5?”

“1,215 pounds.”

He nods. “Alright. 35 pounds a f**k. I cover all expenses, your sister gets to go to school and when I’m done with you…I’ll round the sum up to 2,000 pounds.” Her eyes widened slightly. “You’re good with math. I’ll give you a recommendation as a bookkeeper and have two other recommendations as a shopgirl and bargirl written up as well. You won’t have trouble finding work after that.”

She stared at him for a moment, clearly thinking before nodding. “Agreed, Mr. Shelby.”

“Alright.” He stood up and extended his hand. She shook his hand and he saw what she meant as to having never done a day’s work in her life. Her hands were soft and small, but strong.

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet.” He said. “Haven’t f**ked you yet.” He removed his coat and said. “On the desk.”

She inhaled and said. “My sister…is outside. I’m going to tell her to go outside and play.”

He frowned and then said. “Actually I’ve got something better.” He moved towards the door and opened it. “Lizzie, I need you to take Kate’s sister over to Mrs. Green’s boarding house. Pack up their things, see to it that everything gets brought over to my car.”

Lizzie was shocked as hell. “Why?”

He exhaled as he said. “Cause I said so!”

Kate moved to stand beside him. “Rosie, Mr. Shelby and I have to iron out a few more details about working for him. Can you handle packing up the bags?”

“Yes!” she said. “That place is a dump!”

she shook her head as she turned to him. “My apologies.”

“Eh, no worries. Hardly worth the 20 a month.” He exhaled and said. “Can you handle that Lizzie?”

“Yes.”

“Right. Take a man and then come back here.”

“Won’t be long.” Rosemary said. “I thought we were getting evicted today, so I already packed our bags!”

he nodded. “Clever thinking. Be sure to get the rent back from Mrs. Green, Lizzie!” Kate inhaled as Rosemary followed Lizzie who was stomping. The moment the door closed, he slammed the door to his office and ordered. “Desk.”

She nodded. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.” He took her hand and bent her over the desk, which instantly caused her to let out a shriek of panic.

“What?” he asked with a frown.

“Nothing.” She inhaled deeply as she whispered. “I’m sorry.”

It was at that moment he remembered the knife on her throat. She must have been face down at the time. He looked around and decided to move her to the leather couch. Less comfortable for him, but it was well worth the look of relief. “Down here.”
She looked at him as if he was some kind of savior from heaven as he put her back on the couch. He undid his trousers while she pushed her skirt up to her waist. He dragged her shorts down to her knees, which he dragged down to her ankles. He checked her, made sure that she was wet enough to take him before plunging into her.

She let out a faint sound as her body adjusted to him. After several strokes, she whispered. “T-thank you.”

He looked down at her and said. “Start thanking me.”

She nodded as she wrapped one arm around his shoulder. She moaned as he continued to take her. He grabbed ahold of her free hand and pinned it above her head. She moaned and wrapped her legs around his waist. 243 f**ks left after this. She was going to be trapped under him for a very long time. She stretched up and her lips met his in a hesitant dance that he’d never get tired of. If he closed his eyes and pretended hard enough...it was almost like being with Grace again.

Chapter 6: At Thomas's house

“This is so cool!!!!” Kate awoke with a jolt to find that she’d fallen asleep…on Thomas Shelby’s shoulder of all places! She sat up abruptly and rubbed her eyes. “Is that where you live???”

“Yeah.” Thomas said in a voice that suggested that Rosemary had been questioning him to death.

“You must be f**king rich!!”

“Rosemary Elaine Carter,” she snapped at her. “you know better than to use language like that!!”

“But---

“No buts!!” She said sharply. “I catch you using language like that again and I will wash your mouth out with soap!!”

Rosemary crossed her arms and sat back in her chair with a huff. “Well, he is rich!”

“I don’t care if he owns all of England,” she stated. “watch your mouth!”

she turned to look forward and shock just ran through her entire body. She now saw why Rosemary had cursed. The house wasn’t a house…it was a three-story brick mansion. It was absolutely spectacular. However, as she looked at it, her blood began to boil. He had all of this…and he’d reduced her original agreement from 50 to 35!? Why?? He could clearly afford to pay her a decent wage. Instead, he chose not to and chose to use her for far less in order to…she wasn’t sure why. In order to wear her down? Humiliate her? Turn her into his whore for free? Whatever the reason was…she didn’t like it! She didn’t like being taken for a fool, which is what he did here. He pretended to be her savior and then he took advantage of her. Well, she wasn’t having that! She was going to have words with him as soon as they were alone.

“Have you lived here long?” Rosemary asked with a sulky expression on her face.

“Five f**king years.” She shot him a glower, which he ignored. “Built it for my wife.”

Her head jerked. “You’re married?”

He shook his head as he said. “No.”

She frowned. That sorta made sense. His wife either left him or died. With his sour attitude, it could be either one. She filed that away in her mind for a later date. The car stopped in front of the mansion and he got out. Instead of getting out on the passenger side, she got out on the driver side with Rosemary. She could tell from the expression on his face that he was aware that she was upset about something, but he hadn’t figured out what it was. She shot him a murderous look behind Rosemary’s back that made him realize just how damn mad at him she really was.

The front door opened and out ran a little boy. “Daddy!”

He turned and for the first time, his face lit up in a real smile. “Hello my boy!” he picked up his son and she hated how her heart softened to see a hardened man holding a child in his arms. “Hey. I told you I'd be back.”

“Yes!” he turned towards her as the little boy plopped his head on his shoulder with a wet smile on his face. The boy bashfully waved at her. “Hi.”

She smiled at him, genuinely finding this boy adorable. “Hello, young man”

“Charlie, this Kate and her sister Rosemary.” The boy waved. “They’re going to be staying with us a while.”

“Ok.”

The sound of heels made her look towards the door as a sweet-faced woman came out of the room. “This is my housekeeper, Frances.” He explained. “Frances, there’ll be two more for dinner tonight.”

She nodded, a faint smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Of course Mr. Shelby. I’ll let chef know. He does have some questions.”

“I’ll answer them later.” He said. “Can you take Kate and Rosemary up? Get them settled?”

“Actually,” Kate said with a smile on her face. “I need to have a word with Mr. Shelby first. So, if you could take Rosemary up first, I'd really appreciate it.”

He shook his head. “I’m busy---

“Won’t take more than a minute.” She shot him a look.. “Believe me, you want to hear this.”

He didn’t. She could see that in his blue eyes. He sighed before walking into the house and she followed behind him. He hugged Charlie and exhaled. “Right, my boy. I’ll see you at supper. Alright?”

“Yes da!”

Kate watched as Frances ushered Rosemary and Charlie up the stairs. Rosemary was chattering about how amazing the house looked, so she was able to follow Mr. Shelby into the library without being detected. He exhaled. “What do you want? I’m a very,” she slapped him so hard that his glasses nearly fell off his head! He exhaled before turning towards her, his blue eyes ablaze. She should be scared of him, but she wasn’t not when she was this f**king mad at him. He inhaled as he said. “don’t

ever---

She slapped him again before snapping. “Thirty-five pounds.!” He frowned. “You gave yourself a real nice discount when you when from fifty to thirty-five! That’s fifteen pounds less!”

“And?” he said. “I’m providing you a valuable service!”

“You’re using me to drain your balls.” His head shot up at her words. “That’s all. I’m merely an empty vessel to be filled in your eyes. Well I won’t do it!”

THAT caught his attention. “We made a deal!”

“I don’t care!” She snapped. “I don’t care! I don’t have to stay---

“You, don’t have a f**king choice.” He pointed out to her. “This is my home. You, have no way to get home. You could call a taxi, but,” he shrugged in disinterest. “my men will send it away. You could walk, but that’s a lot of bags that you have here with your sister. Besides,” he looked her up and down again. “you have no money. Word’ll get out that you sold yourself to me. That I f**king own you.”

Anger boiled over as she spat. “No, you don’t---

“Yes, I do.” He stood up and towered over her as he declared. “I own every… f**king…inch of you, Kate. No one cares. You can call the police…but I own the police.” She inhaled as her blood began to heat hotter and hotter. “I own,” he breathed against her face. “that f**king c*nt of yours.”

She lost her mind. She drew her hand back and slapped him so hard that her hand stung and she left a mark on his face. For a long time they stood there, staring at each other. It was as if they were silently planing how to kill each other. But when he grabbed her, she realized that he wanted her to submit to him. Had his house been simpler, she’d have no problem with that. But no. He lived in an expensive house with mahogany wood everywhere. He was just being cheap and trying to take advantage of her. That’s when she began to fight him and he fought her back. He was stronger, so he overpowered her quickly. She let out a grunt as he grabbed her hands and slammed her back against the bookcase. 

She inhaled deeply, blowing her hair out of her face as her blood boiled over. He studied her a moment and then to her shock, he reached up under her skirt and yanked her underwear off her!! “You’ve got to be kidding me!!” She half-spat at him. “That’s where your mind is going, right now??”

“You started this, sweetheart!” he said as he released one of her hands to undo his shorts. She drew her hand back and slapped him hard. For a moment, they stood there staring at each other breathing heavily and fury pulsating through them. Then, he nodded slowly as if he discovered something. “Alright, so a little rough this time.”

She immediately shook her head. “No.” She was aching. Her thighs were red and she was sore. She could feel him inside her on occasion and she was…beyond sore and not in a good way. He grabbed her leg and brought it up around his waist. She hissed at the stretch. “God!”

“Yes.” He thrust into her without preparing her and she let out a sharp cry. He exhaled as he said. “You’ll learn your place.”

“On my back?” she spat at him.

“Where you f**king belong!”

she inhaled as she spat back. “One day, I’ll get up. Let’s see how you like that!”

he ignored her and continued f**king her hard and deep. She held onto him and let him take her at his leisure. The more he f**ked her, the sooner that she could get out of this house with Rosemary! She let her mind go elsewhere as he f**ked her rough and deep. So deep that she was concerned that he’d get stuck in her forever. She gripped his shoulders and let a plan come to mind. She wanted new terms, but if she wanted them, she had to set them up herself. 

“Oh!” She cried out sharply as he thrust roughly into her sore body before coming inside her again. She gasped and exhaled deeply, her breathing out of control and her hands we shaking so much that she had to hold onto him. When he dropped her leg carelessly from his waist, she spoke. “I want a raise.”

"No." He shook his head. “You just started.”

“I said,” she smacked him on the back of the head, causing him to glower at her. He grabbed her hand and restrained her again. “I want a f**king raise!”

“And I said---

“Shut up and listen to me.” She ordered. “We made a deal earlier, but you manipulated me! You went from 50 pounds, down to 35! We went from sleeping together 150 to 243 times! That’s nearly 100 times for that I have to sleep with you while getting half the price! And if I’m honest Mr. Shelby, at the rate you’re going you’re probably going to break your back and my,” she inhaled sharply as she caught herself. “vagina.” He had the audacity to look amused. “You, took an unfair advantage of me and you know you did! You could clearly afford more, but chose not to. So, here’s what we’re going to do.”

“I didn’t agree to---

“I said,” she shouted in his face. “to shut up and listen to me!!!” He just stared at her, something almost like confusion in his blue eyes. Clearly, he wasn’t used to women yelling at him, especially when he still had his cock buried in them. She inhaled. “You are going to pay me 40 pounds, not 35. 40 times 212 is 8,480. I have 80 pounds in my wallet, which you will take. That means, I’d owe you 210, actually 208, since you’ve already had me twice today. Furthermore, I cannot be seen here as just a doll for you to summon and bend to your will. I must be useful! I know you’re insisting on paying for Rosemary to have a tutor. But I will find affordable schooling. You are going to give me a job at half the going rate.” His brow arched. “You work from home, so you must need a secretary. I don’t know if your son needs a nanny, but I can do that too. I simply will not be just your whore. Nor will I let you take advantage of me and f**k me at a rate that’s far less than what I’m worth.”

“You are not worth 40 pounds.”

“Yes, I am.” She stated firmly. “You could hire any whore you wanted and move them in here. You chose me and I know I’m different because I know that you only use a girl once.” Something like fear filled his eyes and she lowered her voice as she pointed out. “I don’t know what it is, but there’s something about me that you like. So, you will pay me what I’m worth or I’m out of here! Do we understand each other?”

he studied her a long time before nodding. “Agreed.” He looked at her with that intense gaze of his before saying. “I have work to do.”

“It’s Christmas Eve.” She reminded him. 

“Still have work to do. Ask Frances,” he withdrew from her, causing her to gasp. “to show you to my room. Take a bath, relax for a bit…and then I’ll f**k you again. My 40 pound whore.”

She shoots him a look as she gets her clothes back in order. “Whatever you say, Sir!” 

“And Kate,” she exhaled as she glowered at him. “no underwear around the house.” Her eyes bulged in shock. He really, had no filter. “Don’t want to replace them after I keep ripping them off you.”

She nodded and said sarcastically. “As you wish, Mr. Shelby.”

And with that, she walked out of the room with her head held high. She may be on her back for him, but she wasn’t going to stay down there long. One day, he was going to wake up and she’d be gone. She’d never spend a day thinking about him as long as she lived!

Chapter 7: Freeze tag

Today…had been one hell of a day. 

Everything, had gone mostly f**king wrong. Actually if he were right, it all alternated between right and wrong. First, he’d had that horrid meeting with Jessie Eden that had gone badly. But then…Kate had walked into his office and all had been right again after he’d sunk his cock into her tight heat. Then it had gone sour again when he’d brought her home and she’d lost her mind. She…was a f**king firecracker, just as he thought she’d be. Oh, she’d been absolutely glorious to f**k when she was in a fury. He agreed to her demands because he could see in those damn green eyes of hers that she would never give him a moment’s peace. Besides, he still her for a few months. So, one way or another, he was going to get that f**king mouth of hers around his cock. 

Then, he’d opened up the mail to find a letter from Luca Changretta on his desk. He’d felt fear before. However, a vendetta was different. A vendetta…it meant that everyone in his family would die. Luca Changretta was part of the black hand. Sicilian Mafia. They were especially ruthless and they wouldn’t stop until everyone, even all the children, including Charlie were dead. He’d spent the morning calling Moss and making some plans and preparations. The message was clear, tomorrow…Changretta would unleash hell on them on Christmas day.

CRASH!!

Thomas dropped his glass of whiskey and whirled around right as Kate, Rosemary and Charlie all came running in the room! His heart slowed down as Kate came running at him. Before he could react, she grabbed his chair and spun him around to face Charlie. “Tag!” She shouted gleefully with her hair flying around her face like a mad witch. “Your father’s it!”

“What the,” before he could react, Charlie came flying at him with a laugh! “Whoa!” 

Charlie was laughing as he said.” I got you Da!”

“Yeah, you did.” He inhaled as he looked at Charlie who was covered in sweat, but he was happy. His clothes were all in disarray, as if he’d been running all over the house. He exhaled as he held him close. God, he loved him so much. He didn’t get to spend as much time with him as he wanted. Now…they’d have even less time to spend together it seemed if Changretta managed to kill him or Charlie. He exhaled as he asked Charlie. “You having fun?”

“Yes!” he nodded his head excitedly. “We played games and Kate taught us freeze tag.”

He looked at Kate who was breathing heavily in the corner. Apparently, he hadn’t worn her out enough. “Did she?” She rolled her eyes at him as if she could read his thoughts. The clock chimed 9:00 and he stood up as Frances walked in with a plate of cookies for Santa. “Ah, look what Frances brought you.”

She smiled at him as he stood up. “It’s near his bed time, Mr. Shelby. I figured I'd fetch it while Miss Kate and Rosemary kept him entertained.”

“Yes.” He stood up. “Looks like he’s been having fun.” He studied him. “Have you, my boy?”

Charlie nodded enthusiastically. “Yes!!”

He glanced at Kate and said. “Looks like you might get that nanny position after all.”

“Of course, Mr. Shelby.” She said as she examined her nails, as if she knew that she’d get it. 

The little minx. She…had this unique ability to irritate and intrigue him all at the same time. Just like how he wanted to strangle and f**k her at the same time as well. Never before had he felt that way about a woman until her. She…was an anomaly. A mystery that he wanted to unravel. He had to stop f**king her with her clothes on. When she was naked…she couldn’t hide a f**king thing from him.

Rosemary frowned. “But Santa---

“Rosemary,” Kate said, clearly distracting Rosemary from saying that Santa wasn’t real in front of Charlie. “say goodnight to Mr. Shelby and thank him for his generosity in providing us with a roof over our heads.”

“Oh! Yes.” She walked towards him with a smile on her face and her thick, black braids beginning to unravel from their white ribbons. “Thank you Mr. Shelby! My room is nice! I really like it!”

“I’m glad.”

She held out her hand as she said. “Merry Christmas!”

He hesitated before shaking her hand. “Merry Christmas.” Strange. This…all just felt strange. He turned to pour a glass of whiskey for Charlie to give to ‘Santa’. “Right, now, this is your job, Charlie.” Oh, it did his dead heart a world of good as Charlie excitedly took the plate from him and moved carefully towards the fireplace. “Now, give those to Santa,” he knelt down beside him and put down the glass of whiskey. “and Rudolf.” Charlie managed to set the plate down without breaking it. “Good boy. Leave this out for Santa, that's whisky.”

“Whiskey?” Kate inquired with a smile on her face. “Not milk?”

he rolled his eyes at her. “He’s working all night. He’ll need the whiskey.” She smiled and nodded as he turned back to Charlie. “Now, night-night. Merry Christmas.” He held his arms out to Charlie who stepped towards him and hugged him. He held onto him for a moment before letting him go. “I'll see you tomorrow. All right?” Charlie nodded. “Sleep well.”

“Come on, Charlie.” Frances said as she stepped forward and took ahold of Charlie’s hand. “You too Miss Rosemary.”

“I’m waiting for Kate.” She said.

“You go on ahead Rosemary.” Kate said. “There’s some broken glass here and I’m going to borrow a book. So, it’ll be late before I turn in.”

“Alright.” Rosemary hurried towards her and hugged her tightly. “Goodnight and merry Christmas!”

she nodded and held her sister close. “Merry Christmas.” He watched Kate a moment. How strange to see her in almost a maternal light after seeing her in so many other natures. Her face and countenance softened somehow, giving her an almost angelic look. Then, she caught him looking at her and she shot him a look that warned him to stop looking at her. Kate was an attractive girl, but…there were some moments where she actually looked beautiful.

“Go on.” She turned Rosemary towards Frances before kneeling to pick up the glass that he’d broken. Fortunately, it was only in big pieces. After throwing the glass away she cleared her throat and asked. ‘Might I borrow a book, Mr. Shelby?”

he nodded. “Go ahead.”

He poured himself a glass and she asked. “Got an extra?”

He just handed it to her and said. “Take this one.”

She did and she took a large sip. He frowned. Another woman in his life who drank whiskey. She nodded in approval. “That’s nice. Expensive.”

Another dig from her. Why was he not surprised? He poured himself a large glass as she selected a book from the shelf. He studied her a moment before sitting in the chair with his back to the fire. “Remember where my room is?”

She nodded without looking up from the back of the book that she was reading. “Yes.”

“Go upstairs and wait for me in my bed.” She nodded and took a step forward. “Naked.” He added. Sure enough, that got a reaction out of her. She didn’t like being naked as much. “I’ll be up in a minute.”

She bit her lip and asked quietly. “How many times tonight?”

“Two, maybe three.”

Her face fell and she said quietly. “You don’t have to try and go through all 209 nights in one night.”

It was supposed to be 208, but he wasn’t going to remind her. He didn’t care. With Changretta declaring war on this family, he didn’t know how many times he’d get to have her. He intended to have her as many times as he could. “Go upstairs, Kate. Be ready for me.”

She nodded and said. “Alright.”

He leaned back in his chair and finished his glass of whiskey. He needed to be in her so he could think the world was quieter when he was in her, the world made sense. 

RING! RING!

He let out a groan as he walked over and picked up the phone. “Hello?”

Tommy? It’s Moss.

“Moss?” he nodded. “What’d you find out?”

Tommy…one of Changretta’s men were in the station. He had Ada’s license plate number from her car. Tommy’s heart went still. How did Changretta get close enough to Ada for that? Also, he appears to be going after Autumn Shelby first.

Tommy’s heart stopped. Autumn was the youngest girl Shelby. She was sweet and quiet, didn’t even know how to fire a gun. He often wondered if she was touched in the head sometimes because she had a stammer that stuck with her for years. He’d paid good money to have that fixed, but it still came out when she was nervous. Unlike the others, she wasn’t in the business. So, to have this happen was beyond unfair. She wasn’t even in the business and she’d had the guts to plead for Mr. Changretta’s life!

He inhaled as he asked. “And you know this how?”

There was a man in the station tonight. Changretta must have an officer or two in the department, because everything was unlocked. Autumn’s photograph was missing from the file.

Thomas gripped the phone tightly in his hand. “Did they get Autumn’s record?”

No. Moss said. I scared him off before he did, but he did take her photograph.

“F**K!” Thomas cursed. 

“Mr. Shelby,” Frances entered the room, causing him to exhale deeply. “it's your sister.”

He nodded as he said. “Send her in.” He continued speaking to Moss. “They got Ada’s car, you say? Do they know where she lives?”

Yes.

“F**K!” he groaned. “Send a dozen officers to the house. I have men coming,” Ada entered the room with a sack. “my sister isn’t home. Her kid is there.”

I’ll go get him myself personally. Moss assured him. The Missus loves to have a kid about the house.

“Thank you Moss.”

The moment he hung up, Ada asked. “Who’s kid is where?”

He exhaled sharply as he said. “I've had a card, Ada. From Luca Changretta today.”

She frowned. “Luca?”

“Today,” he exhaled. “someone went into the police archives and they had the license plate number to your car.”

Her jaw dropped. “What?”

“Moss is headed over, he’s going to get Karl and bring him over to his house. He’ll be fine.”

“Tommy, what is going on?” Ada asked. “Why is someone---

“Changretta knows where we all live.” He stated. “Moss and a dozen good officers are guarding the house. You’ll be safe for tonight. But none of us, we can’t stay where we live. If we stay out in the open, isolated, he'll pick us off one by one. We need to be together in a place even they won't dare to come.”

Ada went still as she realized what he was saying. “You mean, back home?”

He nodded. “Within a four-mile radius of the Garrison, every man is a guard and a soldier for us. I'm calling a family meeting. Charlie Strong's yard, Boxing Day.” That’d be interesting, with half of them not speaking to each other. “Finn's already there. You tell Polly and Michael, I'll deal with John and Arthur. And Autumn,” he exhaled as he said. “Moss doesn’t know why, but Changretta may be looking for her.”

Ada jolted. “What?”

“We don’t know why, but there was a list found on the floor.” He rubbed his brow, Moss had brought it up earlier today asking if the names had meant anything to  him. They hadn't. “The names of three women. Autumn Winters. Autumn Beaufort. Autumn Middleton. Autumn,” he exhaled. “she’s been clean, so he may not even know that she exits. But, her f**king name ain’t---

“Oh God!!” Autumn jumped up. “Oh, God!! Tommy!”

“What?” he demanded as his heart rate sped up. “Ada? What is it?”

“We went out to the Savoy yesterday.” Autumn rattled off. “Autumn, she bumped into this Italian guy there. Luca.” His heart stopped. “Tall, dark hair, cold eyes and he has a scar on his left cheek.”

He knew where this was going. “Ada---

“We chased him off, but Autumn,” Ada shook her head. “She wouldn’t stop looking at him. They kept staring at each other. It was so strange. We all chased him off, but, he went to the bar. He bought Autumn a drink and I decided to get her out of there. She refused to go!”

he stared at her. “Autumn did?”

“It was strange Tommy. She wouldn’t talk to us after we forced her into the car! And he ran after us!”

That’s when it hit him. He turned to Ada as he stated. “He’s looking for her. Changretta doesn’t know that she’s a Shelby.” He went to the phone and dialed Autumn’s number. “All those women, they’re high society names. They’d have stayed at the Savoy. He’s going through the guest list looking for her!”

“My God!”

RING!

RING!

RING!

Someone picked up the phone. Hello, this is Autumn Shelby’s residen---

“Where’s my sister?” he demanded as calmly as he could under the circumstances.

Mr.. Shelby? Miss Autumn’s not here. Thomas felt the blood drain out of his face as the maid declared. She went out tonight to the Savoy.

He hung up and had the operator direct their call’s to Ada’s house. He needed to talk to his men. “Tommy?” Ada asked. “What’s the matter---

“She’d gone to Savoy!” He stated. “Autumn’s gone running to find Luca Changretta and she has no f**king idea who this bastard is!”

Ada kept crying as he panicked. He didn’t know what to do! Autumn…she as so f**king stupid! She’d literally invited the big bad wolf to join and God alone knew what horrors Luca Changretta was going to reap on Autumn. 

Chapter 8: Like a whore

WHAM!

Kate jumped and dropped the hardcover cop of The Valley of Fear: by Arthur Conan Doyle as Thomas Shelby came storming in the room like he was going to kill her. She stared at him as she asked him uneasily “Mr. Shelby---

“Shut up!” He barked at her, causing her to go still. 

All her suspicions about something going on were definitely confirmed. At first, he’d been tense about something downstairs. But now, he was stressed and angry, really angry. He’d been angry with her before, but that was what she’d call normal anger. He was almost annoyed, but this, he was practically murderous. She just stared at him, unsure of what to do with him right now. At first, she thought that maybe he wasn’t going to put his hands on her. That hope was dashed when he stormed over to the bed and yanked the covers off her. She didn’t like him really, but she liked him even less when he was like this. She wanted to pull the covers back around herself but knew he wouldn’t stand for that.

She licked her lips. “Mr. Shelby,” he grabbed her elbow and yanked her towards him. She inhaled as he grabbed her by her hips and spun her so that she was hanging halfway off the bed! Her feet were touching the floor and he kicked her feet apart and that’s when she decided that she wasn’t going to let him touch her when he was in a mood like this. “Mr. Shelby---

He grabbed the back of her hair and pushed her face into the satin sheets at the exact moment that he thrust into her. Pain, like she’d felt before in her life exploded through her body as Tommy ripped her open. Kate screamed into the covers, temporarily shocked by the pain that she was feeling. Thomas’s fingers buried themselves in her hair and hip. He withdrew and slammed so hard into her that she felt as if he’d knocked the air out of her. After three more violent thrusts, the pain brought her back to her senses. She had to fight him before he hurt her anymore. She reached out, her hands searching in vain for that Sherlock Holmes book and she found it!

She grasped the book firmly in her hand and drew it back. WHACK! “Ow!” He shouted as he loosened his grip on her hair, allowing her to get her head up. “What the f**k is wrong with you!?” He shouted at her.

“You’re hurting me!!” She shouted back as tears streamed down her cheeks. 

“What?” he asked as his grip loosened on her hips.

“You’re hurting me!!” She repeated. “You’re hurting me.” There was a long, awkward silence and then he withdrew from her. She nearly curled up in a ball from the pain as she inhaled sharply. “Oh God.” 

All was silent for a moment and she just lay there, unable to move for a moment. Then, he said. “Stand up.” She didn’t want to. His hands gripped her waist as he said. “Come on, stand up.” 

She shook her head as she whimpered. “No.” But stand she did. He exhaled and immediately knelt on his knees. She frowned as he parted her legs. “What are you,” he used two of his fingers to part her entrance and she let out a sharp shriek. “God!” She inhaled sharply as she grabbed his hand. “God.”

“Alright. Alright.” He exhaled as he stood up. “You’re f**king raw.”

She didn’t even get a moment to comprehend what that meant because her feet the ground! “Whoa!” 

Thomas, was a lot stronger than he looked. She shouldn’t have been surprised, but he was a soldier. He carried her towards the bathroom and settled her on the cool counter. She hissed as the cold marble met her bare arse and instantly stuck to the marble. Thomas knelt and began looking around underneath the cabinets before pulling out a cloth and a green bottle. She watched as he plugged the sink and poured some water in before adding whatever was in that green bottle. She couldn’t read the small print, but it smelled nice. He rolled up his right sleeve before dipping the cloth in the water with an exhale. He then moved to stand besides her, placing his left hand on her back.

“You’re gonna want to cover your mouth for this.” He said.

She frowned. “For what?”

That’s when he put that cloth between her legs. Kate screamed and slapped both hands over her mouth as her body burned! She gasped out in agony as more tears tricked down her cheeks. God, she HATED crying and appearing weak! She especially hated appearing weak in front of him. Thomas avoided looking at her directly as he, for the lack of a better word, wedged that stinging cloth inside her, causing her to gasp in pain. He exhaled and kept the cloth inside her while she panted.

It took a good two minutes for her to stop crying and gasping into her hands. She inhaled and then lowered her hands as she asked. “W-what was that?”
\

“Witch hazel and water.” He said. “It’ll help with the swelling and tighten your skin back up.”

She snorted. “I bet you’d just love that!”

“Maybe.” He said quietly. “You’re so f**king tight that I don’t think I need you to be any tighter.” 

She shook her head, unsure if that was a compliment or not. “Thank you?”

He ignored her a moment before asking her. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

"Tell you what?"

"That you were hurting."

She bit her lip and said. “I thought it would go away.”

“You had a fiancé---

“I only slept with John twice.” She snapped at him, warning him to change the subject. “What he did with me was VERY different than what you do to me!”

he studied her for a long time before asking. “John, eh? That was his name?”

she nodded and diverted her gaze as she confessed. “Also I didn’t think that you’d care. But...it hurt too much to be quiet anymore.”

He was silent for a long time and then he said. “You…owe me, over 200 f**ks. You’re no good to me if you can’t give them to me.”

“How touching.” She said sarcastically. She bit her lip and then decided to say. “I don’t…want to do it that way anymore.”

“What way?”

“Face down.” She said softly. “It makes me feel like a whore.” He shot her a look that said ‘what do you think you are now’? she exhaled as she stated. “I know what I am. But…I don’t feel like it until you do that to me. I know…I agreed to let you use me so I could pay you back, but does it have to be so degrading?” he withdrew the cloth from her sore entrance and dipped it back in the water. “I can’t say or do anything in that position either. I have…no control. If I didn’t have that book…I couldn’t have stopped you. You’d have probably f**ked me till I was bleeding.” She jumped and asked. “Was I bleeding?”

“No.” He jerked his head to the side. “Check the water.”

She looked right as he pressed that cloth right back inside her. “Oh, God!!” She bit her finger. “God!!” that was a dirty trick he did, but the water was clear. She exhaled before asking him. “Do I need to see a doctor?”

He shook his head. “You’re not bleeding.”

“Ok.”

After a moment of silence he stated. “Alright. No more face down.”

She smiled faintly at that. “Thank you.” She hesitated before adding. “That’s kind of you.”

“Well, it’s better when you enjoy it.” He stated.

She nearly snapped that she didn’t enjoy it, but she wasn’t going to do that, not after he’d agreed to not do that again to her. It was kind of him and while he was cold and unemotional, he was showing a hint of kindness now by taking care of her. He didn’t have to stop because he was hurting her. He chose to stop because he didn’t want to hurt her and that was comforting to her. He was clearly a dangerous man, but not too dangerous. She remembered how she’d hit him earlier today, several times and he didn’t raise a hand to her even then.

Again, there was an awkward silence between them. Courage, or temporary insanity prompted her to ask him. “What happened?” his finger twitched on her back, but apart from that, there was no other reaction. She decided to ask again. “I know something happened. You were tense downstairs. You broke a glass and now,” she shook her head. “you’re angry about something.” He said nothing as he took that cloth from between her legs and dipped it back in that water mix. She leaned forward and grabbed his wrist, forcing him to look at her. She inhaled, seeing that brokenness in his eyes from the first time that she met him. Yes. Something was troubling . “Tell me.”

His brow arched as he asked. “Tell you?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re going to explode.” She stated without flinching as she held his gaze. “What is going on,” she asked softly. “that has you going out of your mind?” he didn’t react, so she reached out with her thumb and touched that scar on his cheek. Yes, it was bold of her, but he needed something. He definitely needed her, but he’d bruised her body, used her too hard, too fast too soon.. She wasn’t physically able help him get rid of this stress. So, she had to try to offer him some form of comfort. He studied her as she said softly. “I don’t need details, but, a simple explanation would do.”

He studied her for a long time and then he said. “Nearly 2 years ago…a man murdered my wife.”

She blinked, not expecting to hear that. That explained…so much about him. “I’m sorry.” She whispered as she held his gaze.
“I had that man killed.” She nodded, understanding where this was going. “Today, I received word that the son of that man is in London. He went after my younger sister tonight.”

She gasped as she asked. “Is she alright?”

“Don’t know.” He shook his head. “Can’t get ahold of her.”

Now she understood. Someone had taken his sister. He was freaking out, he needed somewhere to bury that energy and that’s why he’d come flying in the room as if he were mad out of his mind. 

She hesitated before asking softly. “Do you think…that he’ll hurt her?”

He exhaled deeply before nodding. “I do.” She gasped. “We’re going to find her in an alley, all cut up, raped with her f**king brains blown out.”

“Don’t.” She said firmly as she grabbed his hands. “Don’t think that way. The police---

“Can’t help her.” He said lowly. “I have men out searching for her.”

“Then maybe they’ll find her.” She said softly. “Something tells me that you’re a man who doesn’t believe, but, it’s Christmas.” He shook his head. She smiled softly. “I somehow knew you were a heathen, Thomas Shelby.” He said nothing at her little dig, but she saw the right corner of his mouth turn up, just a little bit. She ran her thumb over that section of his mouth, causing him to look at her. “A little faith. Maybe, she’ll be alright. I hope she is.”

“Yeah.”

He nodded solemnly. After a moment, she exhaled deeply, unwilling to believe what she was about to do. “Come here.” 

He frowned. “What?”

“Just…come here.” She took ahold of his shirtsleeve and tugged him closer to her. 

He was skeptical until she wrapped her legs around his waist. He shook his head. “You’re too raw.”

“Shut up.” She said causing him to stare at her in surprise. “You don’t need a f**k Mr. Shelby.”

“That so?”

“No.” She held his gaze as she said. “When you lose people, you don’t think about wanting to f**k them one last time.” She placed her hands on his shoulders as she leaned forward. “You want to hold them.”

And with that, she kissed him on the mouth. He stood there immovable as a statute for a moment. She didn’t give up though. He was cold, he was dead, he needed a minute. When that moment was over, his hands were around her waist and hips. He picked her up and carried her back to his bed. He got on top of her and she undid his trousers and shorts. He guided her hands around his neck and back while his one hand brought her hips upwards. She could feel his erection against her entrance and that made her nervous. She slid her right hand down his chest, down his stomach until she found his hand stroking his member.

He let out a sound, but he curled her hand around him. She flushed red, slight embarrassed to be touching him like this but he’d taken mercy on her. She could help him relieve his stress. She touched him, stroked and fondled him as he instructed her, all the while he breathed against her face. If she were honest, his kisses were a pleasant distraction and they made her head spin on occasion. This was one of the occasions. They were making sounds of pleasure against each others mouths until Thomas finally came, sending his seed all over body.

She felt a little dirty, but, he looked better. Less stressed and that helped her relax right now. He was worried and upset. This was the only way that she could help him. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and let him kiss her. His kisses were like those of a vampire, trying to suck whatever emotions out of her that he could get. The sad part was, she was as dead as him. There was nothing inside of her left to give him that wasn’t pretend. But if this was what he wanted, she had no problem giving it to him. She now knew why he hired her like this.

He needed an outlet and she, for some reason known only to him, was the perfect outlet for his stress. She knew he smoke and drank, but she didn’t know about drugs. But if he did do drugs, she was his new drug of choice.

Chapter 9: Strange women

Kate…was a mysterious woman. She was kind, she was sweet and she was too f**king good for him. But then, she was a women and women were nothing if not strange!

Hearing that Autumn had actually gone off in search of Luca Changretta…that had filled him with an unexplainable feeling of helplessness. He HATED that. He was always in control of things. But this…his little sister was out there, wandering around with the black hand. The things that Luca Changretta would do to her…it was unthinkable. Autumn, she was a beautiful girl. She’d always been known as the beauty of the family. Grown men had started looking at her from the moment she turned twelve. Leaving her behind during the war had worried him and Polly had made her learn the books in order to keep an eye on her. Autumn, this was completely out of character for her! She was shy. She was quiet. She minded her own business. She spent half of her life with her nose buried in books. So, why the hell had she gone back to the Savoy in search of an Italian gangster? She’d been friends with Mrs. Changretta until he and John had put a stop to it. That had made no sense to any of them. Still, she did sneak down to the Italian side every weekend for books and some foods. But not once, did she ever give an indication that her appreciation for Italian extended to men as well.

As far as men went, he was a royal bastard. He hadn’t realized that he’d been hurting Kate. He was used to f**king Lizzie. Lizzie had been used to taking up to ten or more a day. She could handle him five or so times a day. Kate…she was just so good. She felt good. She felt amazing and he loved being with her. He loved the sounds she made and he could lose himself in her so damn easily. He didn’t realize just how lost in her he’d been until she screamed at him that he was hurting her. At first, he thought that she was exaggerating, but a mere touch of her hot and swollen red folds proved that she wasn’t. She had to be in terrible pain and she hadn’t told him. While he didn’t care how she took his cock, he did prefer that she not be in pain. Hearing that her soldier of hers had only had sex with her twice, said that she really wasn’t the kind of woman who slept around. He doubted that she'd let another man touch her since that John of hers had died. He needed to remind himself of that. She may have been brought to him as a whore, but she was practically a virgin. And f**king a virgin 8 times was going to be painful for her. 

He felt a twinge of guilt as he remembered how he’d taken her today in the library. He could say that she put herself in that situation by getting physical with him first. She slapped him. Three times!! He NEVER let anyone put touch him like that! He let her touch him. Then…there’d been that tension between them and she looked at him with those damn green eyes of hers. Eyes that seemed to dare him to touch her. So he did. When she slapped him for a fourth time he figured that rough sex was something that she was into. So he obliged her. He f**ked her. He f**ked her hard, rough and deep while her nails dug into his neck. Her cries…they were high and seemed pleasurable, only now as he played them back did he hear discomfort in her voice. He’d have to keep an eye on her.

But then…there was this moment in the bathroom with her. Somehow, she’d known that there was something wrong. She’d known that something was bothering him. How she knew that it had nothing to do with her, was beyond him. She…was so sweet and kind. Like Grace. Somehow, she coerced a few words out of him without even trying. He knew that he couldn’t use her body for a few days, but she still offered herself to him. She kissed him, offered him comfort and he took what she was offering him. He could tell from the way she touched his cock that she’d never held one in her hand before him. He’d been patient, guiding her soft and gentle fingers around him, showing her how to get him even more excited. The kisses…they meant nothing, but in moments like this they felt like they were in a fever dream together. When he came, he came all over her stomach and somehow managed to nail her chest. She was all flushed when he got off her, after taking one more kiss for her willing lips. She had no right being a whore. After him, she deserved to find love. A good man who’d love and treasure her. He wouldn’t. He destroyed every good woman he touched.

Ada was minding the phone while he’d gone upstairs for a moment. Kate, she had a way of taking so much stress off his shoulders. Now, he was waiting by the damn phone for it to ring.

RING!

He grabbed it. “Hello?”

Mr. Shelby. The man on the end exhaled reluctantly. We were too late.

He tensed a moment before shouting into the phone. “What are you saying?” So much for Kate and her f**king Christmas miracles!

We’re saying Mr. Shelby…that she got into the car willingly with Luca Changretta. 

Thomas closed his eyes and swore. “F**k!!”

We don’t know where he took her. 

“Find her!” He shouted. “15,000 pounds to the man who finds her and brings her back to me!” he hangs up and the phone and turns to Ada whose face is growing more and more pale by the moment. He exhales as he tells her as calmly as he can. “Changretta was at the Savoy.” Ada covered her mouth and shook her head. “He took her somewhere in his car.”

Ada started crying. “Oh, God. No!”

His heart pounded in his chest as he called Arthur up. “Maypole 245.” Arthur must have been expecting him because he picked up on the second ring. “Changretta’s got Autumn.”

What?

“He’s got her and we don’t know how. Call John, tell him to get everyone out.” He inhaled as he said. “We’ve got tonight to find Autumn. The vendetta doesn’t start until tomorrow, so it’s all hands on deck.” He hung up the phone and turned to Ada who was crying. “Ada, I need you to go up, get Charlie and all his things together. Get down to Small Heath. I’m going to London.”

“Tommy,” Ada hiccuped. “call Alfie.”

He frowned. “Why?”

She inhaled before confessing. “Alfie…he’s got a thing for Autumn.”

He stared at her for a moment. How had he missed that. “What?”

“Tommy…Alfie talks to Sabini. He might,” he moved back to the phone. “he might tell us where they are.”

“Good thinking Ada. Good thinking.” 

He fidgeted as he waited for Alfie to pick up. Alfie loved making people wait, so he picked up on the seventh ring. Now, who the f**k is calling me at this time of night.

“It’s me, Alfie.” He said. “Got a favor to ask of you.”

Oh, I bet you do. I heard Changretta’s in town and given you lot the black hand. No. Alfie said. I ain’t getting involved in that.

“He’s got Autumn.” Alfie went silent. “He tricked her and kidnapped her from the Savoy. She didn’t even know there was a vendetta on and she’s unarmed.” Alfie was silent still and he added. “Come on Alfie. You know she doesn’t even carry a gun. She deserves a chance.”

Alfie was silent for a long time and then he said. I’ll go talk to Sabini. See if he knows where the hell Changretta may have taken her. I’ll call you back.

“I’m going to London.”

Alright, I’ll call you there.” He hung up. If Alfie was as fond of Autumn as Ada thought he was, he was probably going to have to betrothe Autumn to Alfie if she was found alive. “Right, you go pack Charlie’s things. I’ve got to talk to Frances and handle a few other things. And stay out of my room!” he ordered as he picked up his phone. 

He needed to get Kate to leave through Grace’s room. He hated Christmas. He hated the holidays because they always served as a f**king reminder of things going wrong. He snapped his fingers and turned back on his heels. He had to call Michael and have him tell Polly that Autumn, the ‘baby’ of the house was gone and in the arms of the bloodthirsty Luca Changretta. He called John first, but he didn’t pick up. So, he called Michael and told him to get John and everyone to come over to the betting house. They had to plan they had to strategize and his house was closer than Small Heath right now. They were closer to London as well. He was glad that Michael got to tell Polly, he didn’t want to hear her fall apart.

After getting dressed, he went to go back up the stairs, but Frances stopped him. “Mr. Shelby, I’m really sorry to keep asking sir. But chef insists on knowing what time the guests will arrive?”

He exhaled deeply as he said. “Tell everyone to go home.” At Frances’s wide expression he added. “Christmas dinner is cancelled.”

She nodded. “Of course sir. Is everything alright?”

He shook his head before stating. “No. Nothing is alright.” With that, he turned and went up the stairs. “Go wake the girl, get all her things packed. Kate’s as well.” 

“Yes Sir.”

Kate needed to get dressed and he was going to find out how she handled abrupt changes. He hurried to his room noting that he could hear Ada in the room with Charlie. He opened the door and closed it behind him. Kate was in a simple but clearly older mint nightdress that did nothing for her body. The bust gave the illusion of being transparent and he made a note to rip open next time she wore it.

She set the book down and got out of the bed, discarding the cloth soaked in water and witch hazel in a bowl. “Did they find her? Is she alright?”

He shook his head. “No.” Her face actually went pale as he said. “He’s got her.”

“No.” She shook her head as she approached him. “I’m sorry.” He…did not understand this woman. She wrapped her arms around his waist as she asked. “What are you going to do? Wait for a ransom demand?”

He shook his head. “The black hand doesn’t do ransom demands.” She jolted at those words. “Changretta will probably call the house and let us hear her crying before he slits her throat.”

“Slits her,” she asked in confusion. “black hand? What are you talking about?”

“The black hand, is the Mafia.” He stated.

Those green eyes of hers widened and she let go of him. “Mafia!! What…why the hell would the Mafia be after you!? Are you some kind of gangster?!” he exhaled as he tried to conjure up an answer to that. But he didn’t get a moment to. “My God!” she snapped at him! “You are!! You’re a gangster!!”

He was almost amused as he bit out. “What’d you think I was!?”

“With that kind of power, some kind of politician!” she snapped at him.

“Not yet!” he stated. “You…are now attached with me. You and your sister. So, now, the two of you are in danger.” The blood drained out of her face. She stared at him as the blood drained out of her face. “I’m having Frances pack up Rosemary’s things and----

“LOOK OUT!!!” She screamed as she shoved at him! 

She shoved him hard enough to send him crashing into a small table!! He landed on his back and looked up as some strange Italian man charged at him with a bloody meat cleaver in his hand!

---

Chapter 10: Bloody wars

Why the hell did she save this man’s life!? If she’d let whoever this was kill Thomas Shelby, she didn’t have to let him f**k her ragged every night! But no!! Her better nature took over and she pushed him out of the way before his head got split in two like a melon by this mad man with a cleaver! Thomas crashed into a table, falling on the floor. Kate locked the door so that if there were any more men, they couldn’t get inside the room.

She turned to where Thomas was wrestling with the man with the meat cleaver. Kate looked around and grabbed a nearby candlestick holder. It was heavy, which was good. The man was swinging it, trying to chop Thomas in the face! He was strong. He had two hands on the man’s wrist, making sure that he was able to keep that huge knife away from his face!
Kate drew the candlestick back and hit the man over the head! The man swore, but wasn’t moved. She hit him again and when she drew her arm back a third time, he rolled and she nearly hit Thomas in the face! She cursed as the men rolled and tousled over the knife. She looked around for some other weapon than this flimsy candlestick holder. If the damn thing was solid silver she’d have a better chance at helping! But this was useless! She threw the candlestick and looked for another weapon to grab. 

Suddenly Thomas let out a sound and she whirled around to see that he was being strangled. The meat cleaver had been dropped, so it was now down to the men and their bare hands. Thomas was losing this fight for some reason and she wondered if it was due to the alcohol he’d consumed this evening. He was not at his best point. Without even thinking about it, Kate ran over and locked her arm around the Italian man’s throat and squeezed! At first, nothing happened. Then he began to choke as her elbow cut off his air supply. The man began fidgeting and then he let go of Thomas!

Thomas coughed as he held onto his throat for a moment, gasping for air. They locked eyes for a second and Thomas got to his feet. At that exact second, the Italian man stood up and flipped her onto the table that she’d thrown Thomas into. Before she had a chance to react, that man grabbed her by the front of her nightgown, hauled her to her feet and then punched her in the face!! Kate went flying backwards and landed in a pile of glass, causing her to shriek in agony.

Suddenly, there was a groan of pain. She looked up as best as she could to see Thomas Shelby beating the man to a pulp with a shovel from the fireplace! The man tried protecting his head as he crawled away, but Thomas didn’t let up! He was beating the man so hard over his head, back and other parts of his body that the head of the shovel snapped off and went flying across the room while the man let out a scream of pain. Kate sat there staring as a broken bone poked through the man’s arm! He let out a sob as Thomas grabbed the fireplace poker and stormed back.

As he raised it up over his head, she shouted. “Don’t!!” He looked at her and she said. “Your sister!!” his eyes flashed as she inhaled. “He may lead you to your sister!”

“Yeah.” He dropped the poker and grabbed the man by the hair and dragged him into the bathroom. 

Kate exhaled as she shook her head as she picked herself up out of the pile of glass. God, there was some in her arse too! She exhaled as she moved carefully around the glass and the broken table. Thank God that the nursery and guestroom were on the other side of the house. No one heard them. She exhaled as she stood up and walked carefully into the bathroom to get some tweezers and iodine. Thomas had the man in the bathtub and the cleaver to the man’s throat. She kept her back to him, knowing what he was about to do.

“Who the f**k sent you?!” Thomas shouted at him as he pressed the cleaver to the man’s throat.

The man spat at him and she said. “Mr. Shelby, the knife is at the wrong place.”

He ignored her. “Stay out of this.”

“Fine, but,” she found the iodine and the box of bandages. “I bet…if you took one of his balls he might talk in order to save the other one.”

The Italian man’s face went pale and he spat at her. Putana.

Thomas slammed the man’s face into the edge of the bathtub. Kate hobbled out of the bathroom as Thomas turned on the water. The water ran for a while and then she heard a muffled scream. Thomas must have shoved the man underwater before castrating him. There was some angry words and then a loud, sickening crunch. And then…there was nothing but silence. 

Then the door opened.

Thomas came out…and there was blood all over him. She stood there, her mouth opened in shock as she was pulling glass out of her arm. She couldn’t move an inch at this moment though. He exhaled before stating. “Don’t go in there.” He then moved towards the door. “I have to make a phone call.”

She just stared at him as he ran down the stairs. The call was brief, for he was right back up within five minutes. He exhaled before pointing to his closet. “Grab a shift from in there. Someone’s coming to get rid of the body.”

She shakes her head. “Alright, but you have to help me. I have glass in my arms, back and arse!” she stated, causing him to stare at her in surprise “The decanter on the table broke and I can’t reach all of it.”

He nodded. “Alright.” She hurried over as quickly as she could and pulled out a pristine white shirt. She exhaled as she moved to her bathroom. She turned on the light and Thomas immediately began to strip out of his blood covered white shirt. Even his face had blood over it. Once he was bare from the chest up, he turned on the water and stuck his head under the water. She inhaled as she leaned over, placing a hand on his back to help him rinse out his hair. 

He whirled around instantly and grabbed her throat! Her eyes bulged and she grabbed his wrist. The moment she touched him, he released her. She exhaled as she said. “You missed a spot.”

He exhaled roughly and nodded. “Ok.” He stuck his head back under the water and let her help him rinse off. Once he was no longer stained red, she handed him a towel. He dried off and pulled on a shirt. “He doesn’t have Autumn. He’s working with another man, Sabini, who will be joining up with Changretta. He decided to try and kill me first, knowing that everyone else would be easier to take out.” He turned to her and said “Get out of that.”

She shook her head. “Do I---

“Yes!” He snapped. “Now get out of it or I’ll f**king rip it off you!”

“Mr. Shelby,” she said. “calm down, if you can and breathe. I’m just tired of being naked in front of you.”

“Well, how do you suggest I get the glass out of your arse?” she had no answer for him. He bent her over the sink counter and she watched him in the mirror. He moved swiftly and methodically as he be began pulling all the glass from her body. He exhaled before asking her. “Where the f**k did you learn how to choke a man out like that?”

she shot him a look. “I was reading Sherlock Holmes when you came barging in! Do you think I just read those things and not remember details like that?” he opened his mouth and she cut him off. “Do you think that because I’m a woman, that I’m stupid!?”

“Oi!” He stated. “That’s not the sort of thing that women do.”

“Tell me something that I don’t know, Mr. Shelby.” She hissed as he pulled out a large chunk. “Next time, I won’t do anything.”

“Your nose is bleeding.” He pointed out.

She wiped her nose as she nodded. “He punched me in the face.” He straightened up. “I know how to handle a blood nose. It’s not broken.”

“How can you know that?”

“Because I broke it when I fell out of a tree when I was twelve..” she snapped. “I’m not an idiot!”

“I didn’t say you’re an idiot!” Thomas snapped back at her. “I was just asking a f**king question! Just stop being a f**king brat for one f**king minute!”

“You bastard!”

suddenly, Thomas drew his hand back and gave her a sharp crack across her arse cheek! She let out a shriek as she spun around and he shouted in her face. “Just f**king stop!! Just f**king stop…for one minute!!” she decided not to yell at him because that strange tension was back from when they were in the library. She didn’t want him to loose his mind and decide to f**k her again. He exhaled as he said. “I’ve got someone coming to take care of the body. After that, you, Charlie, Rosemary are getting in the car with me. We’re getting out of here and I’m moving us all somewhere safe. Do you understand me?”

she nodded. “Yes.”

He studied her a moment before asking. “Are you hurt anywhere else apart from the glass.”

She shook her head. “No.” He brushed her hair back from her face before wiping the blood from her nose. “I want tomorrow off.”

His brows rose. “Is that so?”

“Yes.” She held his gaze. “No f**king at all.”

He nodded as he said. “You can have the rest of the month off for all I care.”

“May I have your word on that?” she inquired. She didn’t trust him, not for a minute.

He nodded. “You have my word.”

“Good.” The poor idiot didn’t know what he did. He might have suspected that he did wrong, for he opened his mouth to amend it possibly, but she wasn’t going to allow it. She grabbed him by the mouth and stated. “Reminder Mr. Shelby. I didn’t have to save your life. If I let him kill you, I could have just left with Rosemary. Remember that!”

she released his mouth and he stated. “He’d have killed you.”

“He’s with Sabini. Not Changretta.” She stated. “I remember you telling me that. If he was anything like you, something tells me all I had to do was just let him f**k me once and I'd be free. Wouldn’t I?”

he studied her a long time before asking in a low voice. “Then why didn’t you let him kill me?”

she rolled her eyes before stating. “Because you’re a father. Last thing that boy of yours needs to  find you dead on Christmas Day.”

Again, he stared through her with that damning gaze of his before stating. “Get dressed. We have to go.”

“Iodine!” She snapped. “I don’t want an infection.”

He exhaled in irritation before pouring the iodine on a cloth. He hastily wiped it over her cuts before heading out of the bathroom. She shook her head before hurrying back into his room, stark naked and pulled some clothes out of the dresser he’d had brought in for her. She pulled on fresh undergarments, an older dress and she hastily shoved her clothes into a carpetbag. She threw the carpetbag over the railing before going to Rosemary’s room. Rosemary was coming down the room with her bags in hand and a tired expression on her face. 

“What’s going on?”

“I’ll explain in the car, Rosemary.” She said. “Get downstairs with your bags. Quickly, please.”

She inhaled and hurried to where Frances had Charlie. Frances looked at her and her eyes widened. “You’re bleeding!”

She sniffled. “Can you wipe it Frances? I don’t want her to see.”

“Of course!” Frances used her apron to wipe Kate’s bloody nose. “It’s stopped, but what’s happened?”

she shook her head before saying. “Hell’s been unleashed.”
Kate hurried down the stairs with Charlie on her shoulder. Thomas was coming inside and he was breathing heavy. He reached for Charlie and he told Rosemary. “Right, follow me. Kate?”

“Let me grab my bag!” She said as she grabbed the carpetbag. A quick peak in the library showed that Thomas had grabbed all of the Christmas gifts under the tree. Even the one’s that she’d bought for rosemary. She turned to hurry out just as the phone ran. “Thomas?” no answer. She knew that there was a sort of  emergency going on and she shouldn’t answer the phone, but she had to grab it. She exhaled as she answered the call. “Hello?”

Is Thomas Shelby home?
The man was clearly Italian, causing her to gasp. “Yes! Yes, hold on!” she set down the phone and ran outside. “Thomas! Someone’s on the phone for you!”

His eyes widened and he slammed the car door before running up the stairs and into the house. “Hello? Alfie?”

She moved to stand by him, her head resting near his shoulder so she could eavesdrop on the conversation. Shelby? You got a sister named Autumn?

“Autumn?” Thomas tried keeping the concern out of his voice, but the way his hand gripped the phone tattled just how rattled he was. “She alright?” There was no answer. Thomas inhaled before demanding. “Who the f**k is this?” The voice on the other end just let out a long breath, almost as if he were thinking on something. Thomas inhaled before demanding again. “Is this Luca Changretta?”

the voice waited and then said slowly. Yeah.

There was a beat of silence and then Thomas said. “You let her go.” There was a long silence. A silence so long that she wasn’t sure that this Luca was still on the line. “Changretta!” Thomas shouted at him, causing her to jump.
Luca exhaled on the other end. Tommy Shelby, he said slowly a f**king angel saved your life tonight.

She and Thomas frowned as he demanded. “Where the f**k is my sister?”

Luca was silent and then he stated. She’s in bed with me.”

Kate covered her mouth in shock white Thomas stared ahead for a long time. “What?”

I took her virtue. Changretta said quietly, but in a tone that said he was honorably making plans to make things right with Autumn. That means something in both our cultures. I’m taking her as my wife.

Relief flooded Kate. If Luca married Tommy’s sister, the vendetta would have to be canceled. “No.” Thomas said firmly causing her to frown at him. “You’re not.”

Yes, I am. Luca practically warned him. Your men can comb through London, but we’re not at the Savoy, I took her out to dinner. Things got too passionate between us and I took her to another hotel. I’m asking her to marry me tomorrow and she will accept me.

“No, she won’t and we won’t let her marry you.” Thomas stated, causing her to grow even more confused.

Because I’m a f**king Italian, right? Luca inquired. Well…Autumn likes Italians. She likes me. We’ll have a good marriage. She doesn’t know about the vendetta and I won’t mention it to her when I propose. But when I ask her…she will accept because she feels about me the way I feel about her. She will be my wife and I will be her husband. And you lot can go f**k yourselves because she will be my wife!!

And with that, Luca hung up on Thomas! Thomas swore violently as he shouted. “F**k!”

she exhaled as she said. “Well, that’s a relief.”

“What the f**k do you mean!?” he demanded, causing her to stare at him in surprise.

“Well, he wants to marry her. That means---

“No.” He shook his head firmly. “My sister, is not marrying a f**king Italian.”

She cursed the day that she ever met Thomas Shelby. The two of them seemed to be damned to be locked in a violently explosive tango. And right now….another explosion was due.

Chapter 11: Fighting naked

She could see in his eyes that Thomas knew that he’d messed up, he just didn’t know how. Oh. She’d SHOW HIM HOW he’d messed up!!

“Hold on!” She held up a hand as she said. “You spent…HOURS worried that your entire family was going to get killed by this man. That he was going to rape, torture and murder your sister! Instead… you find out that they developed feelings for each other and you can’t have that?”

“No, I f**king can’t!” He shouted. “Not with him!”

“Why not? He loves her so much that wants to marry her and end the vendetta?”

“He does NOT love her!” He shouted. “Those bunch of f**kers, killed my wife!”

“You can’t say that until you’ve spoken to them!” she inhaled as she said. “Until that happens, you have no reason to deny him the ability to take your sister’s hand in marriage. It sounds like it was consensual on her part and if they were talking marriage, then maybe they want to get married.”

“They don’t. We don’t allow it.”

She stared at him as he poured himself a drink. “For pete’s sake. Why!?”

 “Because he’s a Changretta!!” he shouted. “And he’s a f**king Italian.”

“God, you’re a bastard!” she snapped. “Because he’s Italian, you’d deny your sister the right to marry a man that she clearly has feelings for?”

“She is NOT going to marry into the family that killed my wife!!” He shouted at her. “I won’t f**king allow it!”

ok, that explained a bit more. She inhaled before demanding. “Did he kill your wife?” he didn’t answer. He just glowered at her. “You said he was from America. Was he even here when your wife was killed?”

“It doesn’t f**king---

“It does!!” She shouted. “it does!! Their marriage solves everything and it would make your sister happy!”

“How can you know that?” he shouted at her. “You heard him on the phone for one f**king minute----

“All I needed to hear was how he spoke about her.” She said. “He called her his wife and brought up marriage five times. The passion, the determination in his voice was all I need to know that he cares very deeply your sister! He is most certainly in love with her!”

“In love with,” he grabbed ahold of his head like it was going to explode. He let a string of foul words before turning and shouting in her face. “they’re not in love! They just f**king met!”

“You just told me that your sister is shy!” she reminded him. “That she’s sweet and quiet. Girls like that don’t just go jumping into a man’s bed for no reason! Especially men who are gangsters! Black hand Mafia leaders no less”

“Well you f**king did!” He snapped at her.

Her green eyes widened as she snapped. “You bastard!”

“Oi! Sometimes women do things---

“Oh, shut up!” She growled. “Has she ever had a suitor or a lover before?”

he exhaled. “No.”

“So,” Kate inhaled. “she’s never had a suitor or anyone in her life. But she jumps into the bed with a man that she’s only met once…for what reason?” He just foundered and she demanded again. “Why would your sister get into bed with that man unless you assumed that she, like me, is another f**king whore?”

he jolted before shouting. “My sister has never kissed a man before in her life!”

“So, why’d she get into bed with him!?”

“I don’t know!!”

“She’s madly and deeply in love with him as he is with her!” she shook her head in disgust before stating. “God, it’d just kill you to admit that, wouldn’t it?”

“They are NOT in f**king love!!” He shouted at her. “They’re not!! Not in one f**king day!”

she remembered John turning up at her house deliver some medication to her father. It had been one look, one moment, but it had warmed her all over. She loved him and he loved her. Thomas Shelby, he’d given up on love so he sneered at love, even when it came to his own sister. She inhaled as she stated. “Some people meet for one day and just know. It’s rare, but it happens! Maybe that’s what happened for them! Like in Romeo and Juliet.”

He snorted before stating. “Romeo and Juliet were two children who killed themselves!”

“Because their families wouldn’t stop fighting.” She pointed out. “They weren’t allowed to be happy together on earth. They had to die to be together! Are you guys going to do that!? Would you REALLY rather put your family through danger than let them marry because he’s Italian?”

“Yes!”

she slapped him and spat. “God, you’re disgusting! We need to get the kids back to bed!”

“The kids are not---

“The assassin was from Sabini, you idiot!” She reminded him. “Changretta, called off the vendetta! He’s not going to kill anyone because he wants to marry your sister! We can all go upstairs and go to sleep without worrying about being f**king killed in our beds!”

“I have to find my sister!”

“Fine, then don’t go to bed, stupid man!” She snapped at him. “I’m getting Charlie and Rosemary. I’ve had enough of this!”

“Kate!” He snapped at her as she started to stomp out of the room. “That naked ass of yours better be upstairs in my bed when I get up there!” 

God, this man had a problem with sex. It controlled his every being and unfortunately with him, he was thinking with the wrong head. “As charming as that invitation sounds,” she said sarcastically before turning to face him. “you gave me the month off, remember?” His face froze as she said sadistically. “You get NOTHING Mr. Shelby! So f**king suffer!! And I hope your sister marries that man and has lots of beautiful Italian babies just to piss you off!!”

As she slammed the door and went out to get Rosemary from the car, a wicked punishment for him hit her. She’d do what he said. She’d sleep next to him naked for the rest of this month. She’d probably freeze to death, but it’d be worth it to watch him beg and plead to f**k her. She’d deny him of course. She felt cheap doing this, but just once, she was in control of her body and he had no choice but to honor her request.

---

Christmas morning,

---

Thomas came down the stairs to the sound of children singing and laughing. He, was going to murder Kate one day!! He’d been angry before, but THIS WOMAN!! OH!! She was something else!! He wanted to kill her!! Strangle her with his bare hands!! Never before in his life had he met a woman who made him lose his temper so much in so short a time! He’d been under so much pressure and she…she was like a goddamn jack-in-the-box. Her personalities were just all over the f**king place! One moment she was jumping on a man’s back, choking him out to save his life! The next, there was this soft, gentle, almost tender connection between them. But half the time, she was this wide-eyed lunatic that was screaming her head off! He did not understand her! 

He went into the parlor to see that Kate had moved the Christmas tree out of the library and the whole parlor had been done up for Christmas. All the kids, including all of John’s unwashed brats, Karl, Rosemary and Charlie were all running around and playing in the parlor. As before, Kate was in the middle of everything acting ten years younger with her hair hanging down her back. God, he hated her! He looked at her and he hated how much he wanted her! He wasn’t in love with her. He just wanted to own her! To f**k and dominate her until she broke and listened to him. But Kate, was different. She didn’t appreciate being told what to do and she took everything he said as a mere suggestion, not an order.

He knocked on the door and said. “Kate?” She looked up. “A word?”

She shook her head at him. “No. Your family is in the library. Deal with them!”

He was almost stunned at her attitude. “Excuse me?”

“I’m babysitting. You’ve got grown up babies to deal with.”

That…f**king…little…witch!! He exhaled sharply before stating. “I’ll deal with you later.”

“Whatever.”

He groaned and walked away, flexing his hands as he tried not to think about his fingers closing around that perfect, creamy throat for hers. Not enough to choke her to death, but enough to make her sputter and flounder underneath him as he f**ked her. God, did he want to f**k her. Why the hell did he tell her that she could have the rest of this month off!? She, unlike anyone else, had this annoying talent of getting him when he was in a weak position! He had to keep his hands off her for a whole bloody week, while she pissed him off by sleeping next to him stark naked! God, when he’d gone up to bed to see her in bed like that, he’d nearly take her. She’d seemed to know that thought was going through his head, for she’d left a note on his pillow that said.

Touch me and I’ll chop your balls off.

He believed her. Still, the threat hadn’t prevented him from getting a good night sleep. He always slept well next to her. He’d get his revenge the moment the clock chimed Midnight on December 31st. He opened the library to hear everyone shouting at everyone. Polly was a sight she looked like a banshee on the moors. When he approached, John shouted at him. “Is it true!? Autumn’s with Changretta?”

He exhaled as he nodded. “Yes.”

“God no!” Polly shouted. “No! No!”

For a minute he stood there and just let the insanity grown and build. His head was killing him because of Kate screeching her head off at him. God, he could swear that he heard her in his head now! 

Suddenly, the room went still and he turned around to see Autumn walk in behind him. Not the Autumn that he was used to seeing. Autumn wore dull colors, her hair back and no makeup. This Autumn, wore a vibrant pink dress, makeup, her hair was down and there was a brilliant smile on her face. He wouldn’t draw attention to it directly, but there was a sparkling diamond ring on her finger tattling that she was engaged. And considering that Luca Changretta had announced his intentions to marry Autumn last night, that only meant one thing. That she’d accepted his proposal this morning. F**k it all to hell if there weren’t stars in those damn blue eyes of hers and she looked happy. Probably happier than she’d been in a long time.

“Merry Christmas!” she said with a bright smile on her face.

Those two words tipped him over the edge of reality and he officially lost his mind.

Chapter 12: Angry and armed

Oh my God, did this family not know how to stop screaming for one minute? All the children glanced worriedly at the door and Kate assured them. “It’s alright. They’re just having a family discussion.” She attempted to laugh. “You Shelby’s are a lively bunch.”

“Is it because of uncle Thomas?” John’s oldest girl, Margaret, she thinks her name was, asked uneasily. There’s too many kids in this house! “He nearly had my dad killed.”

“That’s part of what they’re discussing.” She said. “Also, Autumn has received a marriage proposal from an Italian. So, they’re talking about that as well.”

“Dad says she’ll never marry a wop.” That was from one of John’s sons and all she could do was stare at him. Children, they were so innocent to hear their parents hate being bred in their mouths, was hard to hear.

She exhaled and said. “How about I go ask them to keep their voices down?” All the kids stared at as if she’d just asked them to fly to the moon and get her a piece of cheese. She turned to Frances, who was also having the time of her life playing with the younger children. “Frances, could you send word that the baby bottles could be warmed up, please?”

“Of course.”

Kate left the room and drew the door shut. The first thing she did was look for the hidden panel on the hall that Thomas had left open the other night that revealed the armory. They didn’t respond to niceness, this family. They responded to threats a mere push revealed the armory. She selected a pistol and checked to see that it was loaded before entering the library.

When she entered the library, she saw the entire Shelby family was Autumn’s face shouting at her. The poor girl looked like she was going to be sick. Her face was white and she was clutching onto her presents for dear life. She thought Thomas was a fearsome thing to behold, but John, oh. His hate for Italians was apparent in his contempt for his sister.

She looked around and just fired the gun into a baseboard. BANG!! Everyone jumped and looked at her with surprise. Except for Thomas. Thomas looked at her as if nothing she could do would ever surprise him. She cleared her throat as she shouted authoritatively at them. 

“ENOUGH!!!” Everyone took a step back from Autumn who shot her a look of relief. “Now, the kids are upstairs and they can hear everything. I don’t care if your heads all explode, but you all have been yelling and cursing up a storm for an hour straight!! It’s Christmas!” She snapped. “She’s alive! Find better words and grow up! You’re ruining the holiday for the children!”

“Get your ass upstairs!” Thomas ordered.

She looked him dead in the eye and said. “No.” She could tell that everyone was stunned. Why wasn’t she surprised there? No one talked back to him, not even his own family dared to do that. “I’m taking the kids downstairs so they can have their presents.” The kids were already downstairs, but she was giving them a chance to realize that they had to shut up. “All of you, especially you, Mr. Shelby, will watch your tone of voice. Are we clear?”

for a moment no one, not even Thomas said anything. But it was his quick-witted aunt who said something first. “Who is this Thomas?”

Thomas was silent for a moment and then he shrugged. “Her name’s Kate.”

“I said, who the f**k,” Polly half-shouted. “is she Thomas and why is she in your house?!” naturally everyone was curious about the woman who dared to raise her voice to Thomas Shelby and turn him down.

there was an awkward silence until Kate cleared her throat. “I-I owed a debt collector money and…he paid it off. I’m working for him, to pay him back.”

“Doing what?” Polly demanded.

Thomas exhaled as he stated firmly. “Poll…it’s between us.”

She wasn’t going to let Thomas leave her job ambiguous. Yes, she was sleeping with him, but his family didn’t need to know that. “I’m his at-home secretary.” She explained. “I write the letters and stuff like that at home so it’s ready to go to the office. I also help Frances around the house a bit, like with the food preparations. The menu got changed, but, dinner will be ready at 6 if you all plan to stay.”

“We’re not staying.” The older brother, Arthur said.

“It’s Christmas.” She said calmly. “I already sent a few of Mr. Shelby’s men off to your residences to collect the presents from under the trees.” All the adults stared at her. “No reason for the kids to have a miserable Christmas.”

Autumn stepped forward as Kate turned to leave. “Here.” While Autumn had the Shelby cheekbones and blue eyes, she didn’t act like a Shelby. She was soft and gentle. She dressed in soft pastel colors, not dark, harsh colors. It was as if the darkness from this family hadn’t managed to taint her. “I have p-presents and there’s a few more in the car.”

“Car?” Thomas asked her. “You came in a car?”

“Yes,” she inhaled as she extended the gifts. “Luca gave me a car.”

“Oh, Christ.” Polly said. “Autumn---

“Wait,” Kate cut Polly off as she took the gifts. “until I’ve closed the library door before going off again.” Autumn stared at Kate as if she had a death wish,. She might have, but she was fed up with this family, except for Autumn. It was clear that she was a soft and quiet girl like Tommy said. Regardless of anyone’s concern’s, Kate could see that the only reason that this girl got into bed with that man was because of her feelings for him. And those feelings weren’t lust or anything sordid like Thomas felt when he looked at Kate. They had to be love and the beautiful ring on Autumn’s finger was testament to that. She gave Autumn an encouraging smile before turning back to address the two ladies holding their babies. She cleared her throat as she said. “I have the baby bottles warming, so, I’ll be back soon with for the two babies.”

Linda and Esme were stunned for a moment. “Alright.” 

Kate closed the door and managed to make it down to the kitchen just where a maid had finished preparing the bottles for the babies. Both the babies were cute as hell, but Kate was ‘staff’ and had to remain professional. However, professional always went out the window as soon as Thomas opened his mouth. God! She wished that she were a man that she could strangle him!

She could hear him shouting, so she didn’t even bother to knock. Not that it would have mattered. “There’s a vendetta!”

Thomas was all up in Autumn’s face again. Fortunately, the rest of her family had taken a step back from her. “That means death!”

I’m going to kill you,” everyone jumped at the sound of her voice. God, they were all on edge. “if you don’t stop yelling.” She handed a bottle to Esme and Linda, both women had a sour faces on. Neither of them said thank you.

“You,” Thomas threatened. “I’m going to deal with you later!”

“What else is new?” She snipped as she turned and walked out of the room.

“That little b*tch.” Thomas mumbled under his breath. Her temper flared and she drew her arm back and slammed the door so hard that her entire arm vibrated. 

She wasn’t going to go back to the kids, not when her blood was boiling. She moved to go stand outside on the front porch and wound up crashing into a really, really tall man. “Whoa!” She gasped and took a step back.

“Scusi.” He said. “I was going to knock.”

“It’s alright.” She exhaled as she said. “You must be Luca Changretta.”

“Si.” He almost looked amused. “How’d you know?”

“Well, Autumn Shelby turned up with a ring on her finger and the Shelby family is in there falling apart. So, it makes sense that if a man with a huge smile on his face and an Italian accent turns up, he has to be her fiancé.”

“And I am.” He exhaled before asking. “How is my beautiful fiancée?”

“Holding her own, but, I’m certain that she’d appreciate some backup.” 

He sobered up before asking. “They being a bit rough on her?”

She didn’t bother to sugar coat it. “Yes.” He instantly went still. “You might want to come on in. Are you armed?”

He shook his head as he unbuttoned his coat. “No.”

Her eyes widened. “That’s foolish. Here.” She handed him the pistol that she’d taken from Thomas. “You’ll need this.”

“No thank you.” He said. 

“You can’t go in there unarmed!” She said. “That’s crazy!”

“Possibly.” He said simply. “But I am not going to give them an excuse to kill me. I intend to take Autumn Shelby out of this house today, without or without their blessing and marry her.”

She nodded as she stated. “So, my assumption was correct.”

“Which was?”

“The two of you fell in love.”

His face, which was a little worn and scarred, softened at her words. “Si. We did. One look…and I knew she was the love of my life. One hour into our date…and we were already talking about getting married.”

“When you know, you know.” She said softly.

“Si.” He exhaled deeply. “I know that they won’t approve. My mother, she doesn’t approve either our getting married.” He glanced back at his car. “She’s very upset with me. But…I can’t kill her family. I love her more than I could ever hate them. I can’t forgive them and I’m not asking her to do that.”

“You’re just…asking her to understand that you love her.” She exhaled before asking. “Was she involved at all, with the loss your family incurred?”

“No.” He exhaled as he said quietly. “I know why…things were done the way they were. I don’t like it. I miss my father and brother so very much. Autumn, she tried to get my father’s life spared.”

“But no one,” she said tightly. “disobeys Tommy Shelby’s orders. Right?”

“No.” His voice was barely more than a whisper. After a moment he inhaled and said. “But…I am not going to hold her brother’s sins against her. She is innocent and we will be moving back to New York for most of the year. She loves her family and I will allow them to meet, but…I do not have to go out of my way to love them.”

She smiled as she said. “That’s very honorable of you.” The sudden sound of silence caused her to say. “You better go in there.”

“Yes.”

“First door on your left.”

Luca nodded and hurried in. She hurried in but went the opposite direction. Luca wouldn’t take the pistol. Fine! He may be willing to harm himself, but she wasn’t going to let a good man like that just get killed in cold blood. Men like Thomas and John with their hate and prejudice would just gun him down, not caring that their sister was in love with a very good man. Good men…they were few and hard to find. She ought to know. She lost one.

So, she went back to the armory and picked up a rifle. If any of the Shelby men came at Luca Changretta…she’d be ready for them.

Chapter 13: Tension and tempers

Autumn wasn’t backing down. 

No amount of arguing from any of them was stopping them. She was scared on the edge of tears and scared, but she wasn’t backing down. Autumn normally did back down instantly, so this…this side of her was new. Even when John ripped Autumn’s engagement ring off her hand, she’d tried to snatch it back. She wanted to marry Luca Changretta. No amount of arguing from anyone was able to convince her to change her mind, she was adamant. He remembered when he’d told his family when he was marrying Grace. No one had approved, but he’d followed his heart only to have his heart broken a few months later. He was broken forever now.

“I love him.” Autumn said without even backing down for a moment. “That’s why…I agreed to marry him. He didn’t…even tell me about the vendetta until after I'd accepted him.”

“You’re a liar.” John said darkly. John was always pushing Autumn’s f**king buttons because he enjoyed it. “You wouldn’t love a f**king wop.”

“I do.” Autumn was only looking at him though. After several minutes of arguing, she refused to look at anybody else. As if he alone controlled her destiny. “And he loves me.”

“It’s a trick, Tom.” John said.

“Well,” Thomas turned to see that Luca Changretta was standing in the doorway, of his house. Changretta stood there, looking tall, intimidating and well groomed. Autumn looked up at Changretta with tears and stars in her eyes as he scanned the room. “if that were true…you’d all be dead right now.” Changretta kept his eyes only on Autumn, not focusing on anyone else in the room. As if she were the only person worth noting and this was confirmed when Luca put his hand on Arthur's shoulder and moved him out of the way. Arthur was clearly contemplating killing Luca, but he didn’t look away from Autumn. “You alright, mi cara?” she inhaled as Luca nudged Polly out of his way. He watched as Changretta reached up and swiped away her tears. “Looks like you have no room to breathe.”

“I-I’m ok.” She said softly.

“Hmm.” Luca looked around and then placed his hand on Autumn’s waist. “Come here.” He guided her around the desk and moved her…to sit in his chair! Thomas’s blood boiled and for a moment he couldn’t tell if that had been done intentionally or not to slight him. But Changretta’s touch on Autumn ad remained soft and gentle. “Sit down for a minute.” She did as he said. Luca took ahold of her hand and his face went still as he asked the question that was sure to start a fight. “My love, where’s your engagement ring?” the tension shot through the roof, but no one reacted. Luca exhaled and repeated in a still soft voice. “My love,  where is your engagement ring?”

Autumn exhaled nervously. “Luca---

“I’m not going to start a fight, if I can help it. But,” Luca ran his hand down her cheek as he told her gently. “someone took my ring off you. So, they need to give it back. Now.”

Strange how Changretta knew that Autumn’s ring had been taken away from her. It was if the thought that Autumn might have voluntarily removed her ring hadn’t occurred to him. “Or what?” John sneered. 

Thomas shot Arthur a look. John and his f**king temper. John being the youngest, was the most patriotic when it came to king and country. So, when the war happened and the Italians signed up for to fight for Italy after living in England, he’d taken that personally. Even after Italy switched sides again John only ever saw them as traitors. He, himself never trusted another Italian after that and neither did Arthur. But John, being young, headstrong and temperamental…always had to go a step further.

Changretta straightened up and stared John down. “I’m going to take it off you.” He removed his hat and set it on the desk before moving towards John. John moved towards him, as did Arthur and Tommy. 

However, they were all stopped short when autumn reached into his desk, pulled out his loaded pistol and cocked the gun. “Autumn!” Ada said with a firm warning. “Put the gun down.”

Autumn actually shook her f**king head! “Three against one,” she inhaled shakily. “isn’t fair.”

Thomas glowered at her. “Autumn, put the f**king gun down!” he never thought he’d see the day that Autumn would draw a gun against them.! For a man like Luca Changretta no less! A man who was practically old enough to be her father!

“Tell John…to give Luca my ring. He had n-no right to take it from me.” She inhaled as she said. “There’s no reason to fight.”

“I agree.” They all turned to see that Mrs. Changretta had entered the room. She looked at them with disgust on her face.. “My son…put that ring on her hand. Only she or he can remove it. Not scum like you!”

“Scum?” John snorted. 

“Oh, my God!” Kate came barreling around the corner like a mad woman into the room and closed the library door. “Why the hell are there guns out? It’s Christmas day and there are children down the hall!”

“John ripped my fiancée’s ring off her hand.” Luca stated calmly. “He won’t give it back and my fiancée is making sure that all of her brother’s don’t attack me.”

She shot him a scolding look before groaning. “Why…are you Shelby’s so stubborn!? It’s HER engagement ring! Just give it back and stop picking fights like children on the playground!”

“What do you expect from gypsies?” Mrs. Changretta inquired. “They’re all thieves!”

those words made Thomas bristle. His father had been a thief. Because of his gypsy heritage, Tommy had worked hard to avoid being labeled a thief. Now, he was being labeled on in his own home! “Enough that they’d steal a ring right off their own sister’s finger, it seems.” Luca said as he gave him a direct look, clearly egging him on.

He wasn’t going to fall for that. Not over a stupid ring. “John,” Thomas ordered. “give Autumn her ring back.”

John looked insulted. After a moment, he reached into a pocket and took out the ring. “Fine. Autumn always was a f**king wop lover.” He dropped the ring on the ground and Luca inhaled. He bent over to pick up the ring…and John spit on Luca. “Make sense that that a slut like her’d pick a f**king wop in the end.”

That did it.

Luca pocketed the ring and stood up. He grabbed John’s right hand quickly and snapped his wrist before anyone had a chance to move! John let out a howl and the whole room descended into chaos and screaming! Luca grabbed John by the throat and slammed him face down on the desk, possibly breaking his nose! 

“Get the f**k off him!!” He shouted as he lunged for Changretta.

“Oi!” Thomas was jabbed in the ribcage by a rifle. He jerked…and saw Kate was the one holding the loaded gun. “Back off! Now.”

he was going to kill her! He shouted in her face. “What the f**k are you doing!?”

“Back off!”

“He’s killing John!”

“You let your brother,” she jabbed him in the ribs again as she poked him with the rifle again. “manhandle your sister. He ripped her engagement ring off her! He insulted your sister by calling her a slut and you said NOTHING!! Her fiancé is well within his rights to teach your brother some manners!”

he exhaled hotly as he threatened her. “You’re going to pay for this! I swear it!”

“I know.” She held his gaze as she said. “It’ll be worth it as long as Mr. Changretta is able to walk out of here with your sister in one piece.” She stared him down as she said. “I don’t care what you do to me. It’ll be worth it.”

It wouldn’t be. He began mentally planning what he was going to do to her tonight. He couldn’t have sex with her, but that left an endless suggestion of possibilities. Starting with her mouth. Tonight, she’d take his cock  and he didn’t care how she struggled, sobbed and begged. She was going to take him fully on her first try and swallow him down because he wasn’t giving her another option. And then maybe, maybe if he felt like it, he’d f**k that virgin ass of hers. He didn’t care if it made her cry, he was going to teach her a lesson.

SNAP!! 

John let out a blood-curdling scream as Luca dislocated his shoulder. Changretta reached for the gun in Autumn’s hand and he took a step forward. Again, Kate jabbed him in the gut with the gun. “Kate!!”

“Unlike you lot,” she snapped as they were forced to watch Luca break John into pieces. Kate was furious and there was no doubt in his mind that she’d shoot them. “your sister isn’t going to let him kill him! However, your brother needs to be taught a lesson! Going around teaching his children to use vile slurs, calling his sister a slut and putting his hands on her! You let him put his hands on her and you did nothing! So, he BETTER put him in his place!”

“Luca,” Autumn grabbed his wrist. “you promised---

“I’m not going to kill him!” He said loudly as he grabbed the gun from her hand. “Even though he deserves it!”

“You f**king wop!!” John shouted. “You whore!!”

“Shut up John!!” he shouted. “Just f**king shut up!!”

it was too late.

Luca took john calling Autumn a whore much more personally than he’d have imagined. Changretta grabbed John’s right hand, held it in place and then broke John’s index finger and thumb with the butt of the gun. And just like that, he was down a steady shot with a gun. John would never be able to fire a gun again. With that, he handed the gun back to Autumn who shook her head at him. Changretta exhaled before standing John upright and pushing him back towards him. 

Kate stepped back with the rifle and exhaled. “He had it coming.”

Those words…they inflamed him. That required…some special humiliation for Kate tonight. He knew just how to do it. All it involved was making one phone call and getting something delivered. It’d hurt her, but he didn’t care. He was going to teach her a lesson tonight that she’d never forget.

“Who…the f**k,” John gasped out as they looked at his arm. Changretta had taken John’s right arm completely out of commission. He looked to where Kate was talking with Mrs. Changretta and looking more and more outraged by the moment. “is that girl, Tommy?”

“I’ll deal with her.” He said.

“How’s she know where the guns are?”

“We had an assassin break in.” Kate stated. “He left the gun vault open!”

F**k! 

“You let Changretta kill him!” Esme said. “My husband could have died!”

“If he put his hands on you, the way he puts his hand on his sister,” Kate said unsympathetically. “good!”

“Kate,” he warned her. “enough.”

“You SPIT on him, John!?” Autumn screeched in outrage. Of course, she’d more upset about that than the fact that Luca nearly broken every bone in John’s right arm.

“F**king deserved it!!” John shouted back.

That set off a new stream of angry words, which Luca and Autumn ignored as they were in a world of their own for a moment.
“You animal!!!” Esme screamed at Changretta, causing Kate to raise the rifle. He made a note to ask Kate where she’d learned to handle a gun. Not much reason for a girl up in Oxford to use it, but she knew how to handle one properly. That much was clear. “You nearly killed him!!”

Changretta’s face went red with anger, but he forced himself to stay calm as he bit out. “He took a ring, that I put with much love on the hand of my fiancée and threw it on the floor. DO NOT tell me that I ignore such disrespect to my future wife!” Everyone, even his mother, stared at him as if he’d lost his mind. “She is your sister! NO man touches her like that! Since both of her brothers didn’t do what they should have f**king done, I did it!” He took the ring from his pocket and blew on it before wiping it on his sleeve. “And no man, EVER calls her a whore in my presence! Are we f**king clear?” everyone glowered at him as he calmed down. He inhaled and then exhaled. He held his hand out to Autumn as if she were a grand lady. “Amore, please?” Autumn moved delicately around the desk and held her hand out to him. Luca nodded as he slid the ring back on her finger. “There it’ll stay,” he glanced at her, asking for permission. “unless you want me to remove it?”

Autumn instantly shook her head. “No. I don’t.”

“Just making sure.” He pressed a kiss to her hand. “Mi cara.”

When they kissed, he saw why Kate was protecting Autumn and Luca. The two of them were in love. Deeply in love and there was nothing that they could do. “Is she hurt?” Kate asked as she approached with that rifle still in hand.

“I’m fine.” Autumn assured her.

“Her finger is swollen, but it’s not broken. Probably when he took the ring off her finger.” Everyone shot John a glower at Luca’s statement. He hadn’t realized that John had gotten that violent with Autumn in the middle of the excitement. “She’s also got several cuts and scratches on her.”

Kate nodded. “I’ll go get some ice, iodine and bandages.”

Luca nodded. “Thank you.”

“Kate,” Thomas half-roared as that mad woman started to leave the library. “you’re fired! You’re f**king fired!!”

That damn woman didn’t even blink. In fact, she smiled at him. “No I’m not!” and with that, she left the room. 

That was the moment he decided that he was going to do it, no matter how heartless it was. He was going to call up the debt collector, find out what had happened to the wedding dress that had belonged to Kate’s mother. He was going to buy it, get it delivered here by tonight. No, they couldn’t have vaginal sex, but there were other things that they could do. And he was going to do it all to her while she was in her mother’s wedding dress and veil. Then and only then…would she understand that her place in life was under him as his f**king whore. That’s all she was. She wasn’t a woman of importance. She wasn’t a part of his family. She was his to do with as he pleased and he would break this fiery spirit that she possessed. She would never, ever fight him or humiliate him again after that.

Chapter 14: Autumn's anger

Kate was boiling with anger. Never before had she met a family that was so darn unreasonable as the Shelby family. Not that she approved of Luca Changretta getting violent with john, but he was protecting the woman that he loved. And after being trapped under Thomas Shelby, it was nice to see a man want to step up to protect a woman, regardless of being outnumbered. She’d had the sense to leave the rifle outside the door. She hoped that she wouldn’t need it, but she’d been wrong about that. It wasn’t a surprise to her that such a simple thing as obtaining his fiancée’s ring back had led into a fight for Luca. However, things had calmed down for the moment.

After collecting the necessary items, she hurried back to the library. Right now, the only people that she supported were Luca, Autumn and Mrs. Changretta. Mrs. Changretta had filled her in a little bit as to what the Shelby's had done to her family, and she was livid. However, she admired Luca for looking past Autumn’s name to look at her with love in his eyes. They were an adorable couple. There was a slight age difference between the two, possibly close to ten years. But their height differences of more than a foot is what killed Kate. The way that Luca always bent down to touch her or stood at an angle so he could reach her. Autumn, she was very tense around her family, but she relaxed when she was close to Luca. It was rather sweet to watch them together. Luca, she could tell by the way that he stood up to her brothers that he was a good man. A bad man would have decided that she wasn’t worth all this trouble.

She pushed the door open to hear….Autumn shouting for the first time at her family. “We are NOT a family!! We haven’t been for a long time!! Look at us!!” she demanded. Kate stood there for a moment and let Autumn have her say. “None of us have been a family since Tommy had all of us put in jail! Arthur, John, Michael and Polly…all of you were nearly hung! I spent two months in prison and all of us are f**ked up!! Linda broke Arthur, he’s so worn and bored out of his mind. Esme and John… John spends his days just ordering her around and knocking her up! Polly,” she shook her head. “Polly is drinking, taking pills and other drugs!!”

Their aunt naturally took offense to that. “How dare you---

“It’s true!!” She shouted at her. “It’s all true Polly! We all know! You’re not fooling anyone! And Tommy! He’s been a mess since the war! No one’s going to fix him! Ada’s the most sensible out of all of us, but since she lives in Boston, no one knows what’s going on with her! And all of us, we have another brother! Finn! Where the f**k is he!? It’s Christmas and you all just left him in Small Heath!! Christmas is when you spend time with family! But we’re not! We haven’t been.” She grabbed a glass and smashed it on the floor. “This…this is us! This is what it’s like living in the Shelby family! I-I’m not living like this anymore! I can’t and I won’t!!”

Ah. It all made sense now. Autumn had had enough of living in this Shelby family. She knew that they were crazy, but…she didn’t realize how messed up this family was. If they were anything like Thomas… Autumn was right to get away from them. She’d found love with a good man and that love brought peace between the two families. It was good. She looked at the rest of the Shelby's and she sincerely doubted that any of them would find the kind of happiness and love that was being offered to Autumn. No wonder she was holding onto it so firmly.

Thomas inhaled. “Autumn---

“No!!” She shouted. “Do you have ANY idea just how lucky you are that Luca and I met first!? That we met before the vendetta could start? No one is going to get hurt!”

“And you’d marry him?” John asked. “Knowing that he was going to kill us all in our f**king beds?”

Autumn inhaled as she spat. “You and Arthur tied his father to a chair and shot him.” Kate’s jaw dropped open in shock. Mr. Changretta, if he was older than Mrs. Changretta, he didn’t have a fighting chance. That was pure torture and murder. That was inhumane and the cruelest form of torture. Mrs. Changretta inhaled and turned aside, trying to hide her tears. “Not even giving him a fighting chance. Mr. Changretta was a good man. L-Luca is a good man and I know that if he loves me even half as much as his father loved his mother…that I will be truly blessed.” She inhaled as she said. “I know that none of you can believe that we could fall in love, but we did. We loved each other the moment we saw each other. Our hearts knew before we knew our own names.” She inhaled as she said. “You… don’t even have to say it. I already know.”

“What?” Polly asked. “What do you know?”

“I’m not a Shelby anymore.” She inhaled as she said. “I wasn’t…from the moment I drew that gun.”

“No.” Thomas shook his head. “You’re not.”

“That’s alright.” She said quietly. “I-I’ve had enough of this. Because,” she pointed to the broken glass on the floor as she said. “I’ve been feeling like that for years. Angry, sad and full of so much p-pain. Then I saw Luca in the club and I wasn’t broken any more. I was whole and complete.” She found his hand with her left hand and held it. “I’m not letting go of that. I’m not letting go of him for all of this. I won't...be told who I can or cannot have feelings for. Nor, will I wait to be married off to someone that I don't love. Luca Changretta will be my husband. You must accept that because I am standing with him.”

Everyone stood there in silence. She moved to put Autumn’s hand in the bowl of ice, causing her to cry out sharply. Kate instantly apologized and Luca hovered over Autumn like a doting fiancé should. “Sorry. That’s really red.”

“I don’t think it’s sprained.” Luca said as he took some ice and pressed it to the top of her hand. “It’s just swollen.” He reached for the iodine. “Here I’ll clean her hand.”

Kate leaned over and mumbled before stating loudly. “She’s got 4 cuts on her hand!”

“I know,” Luca said calmly as he poured some iodine on his handkerchief. She hissed as he applied it to her hand. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry mi cara.”

“You didn’t do it.” Autumn reminded him.

“No, but, I am the one putting it on. So, for the moment, I’m hurting you.”

She whispered softly for his ears only, but Kate heard him. “It doesn’t hurt when you touch me.”

He smiled softly at her before leaning forward and pressing a kiss to her forehead. She was the one who caught a hold of his dark green tie with her other hand and tugged him downwards so she could kiss him lightly on the lips. Everyone in the room seemed shocked that she was the one to kiss him, but clearly Autumn didn’t care. Luca leaned forward and deepened the kiss briefly. She locked eyes with Thomas, silently telling him that he needed to let this marriage happen. Autumn was in love with Luca and Thomas couldn’t afford to lose one more family member.

Luca laughed softly as he broke the kiss. “We’re not alone, amore.”

“I don’t care.”

Luca laughed at her as he spoke in Italian. Mio Dio, quanto mi rendi felice, mio ​​bel fiore.

“What’s that?” Ada asked.

“He said,” Mrs. Changretta translated dryly. “my God, how happy you make me, my beautiful flower.”

God, that hurt to hear. That man, he just came up with soft and beautiful words on the spot without even trying. His love for her was that deep and genuine for her. “If you’re telling the truth.” John mumbled.

She lost her mind again. “Oh, for God’s sake!” Kate snapped. “All of you Shelby boys need to grow up and act like men! They are getting married! Ask the important questions while you have them here now before they go off to Italy!”

Polly glowered at her. “This is none of your business.”

“I got dragged into it last night, thanks to Thomas.” Kate snapped at him as she held his gaze. “Romeo and Juliet ended very badly because of people meddling like you. You were all so worried about her being alright last night. Well guess what? She is alright! She’s safe! She’s already stated that she plans to marry him and he’s clearly deeply in love with her.” She inhaled and tried to calm down. She looked at Thomas, trying to talk sense to him. He appeared to be listening to her somewhat. “She said her piece. Now, all of you…men, should sit down and make him go through the right of torture that every suitor has to go through before being granted her hand in marriage.”

“We’re already engaged.” Luca pointed out.

“Yes, but if these three idiots actually grill you about your intentions towards their sister and find nothing to object to, it might make the marriage between the two families go much easier.” Kate pointed out. “Every man goes through it, why not you?”

Luca exhaled as he said. “I have no problem answering their questions. My intentions towards her are pure and good. I love her.”

Kate nodded as she looked from Thomas to Luca. “That’s very obvious. Now, there are several other things that should be taken into account. Your mother isn’t happy to have you marrying her either. Both families, need to sit down and talk, especially hers. With her being the youngest daughter, there are more concerns.” Someone snorted and she snapped her fingers at John. “Mr. Changretta being Italian is not to be factored in as an objection towards his qualification as potential husband. The only things that should matter,” she looked towards Thomas as she spoke. “is, can he take care of her? Does he make enough money to support her? How do they intend to raise their family? If she wants to get a divorce---

“We won’t!” Autumn and Luca chimed in unison. Autumn cleared her throat as she clarified. “We’re not.”

Kate shook her head as she said. “Alright. So, the family needs to talk to terms and do it peacefully. It doesn’t matter if they like the marriage or not. You two are going to marry, no matter what anyone says. They don’t have to like or accept that. But, it might be easier to let her go, if they know that she is indeed safe and as loved as you say she is.”

“This is just f**king nonsense!” John stated. “Not after what she f**king did to me!”

“John,” Thomas said in a low voice. “sit down. Everyone, sit down.”

Everyone turned at stared at him, even Autumn stared at him in shock. She knew that he was never this reasonable, but something she’d said, must have rung a bell inside that cold heart of his. He was willing to listen, that was a great beginning for the family and Autumn’s marriage.

She gave him half a smile as she exhaled.  “I’ll go take care of care of the kids---

“Kate,” he bit out harshly, clearly not wanting to appear soft “sit the f**k down and close the door.” Kate opened her mouth and he snapped his fingers at her. “You opened that f**king mouth of yours, so you put it to f**king use. So, either sit your f**king ass down or that deal is f**king over!”

She knew what that meant. That she wouldn’t have time to recover. That made, no sense. He wanted to f**k her? Why? Either way, it would be wise not to argue with him now. Not when he was being gracious and reasonable. She sincerely doubted that he’d break his word. He was a man of his word. And while he was being grumpy to show that he was the boss, it didn’t hurt to make things a little light-hearted in the room.

She bowed at him before stating. “As you wish, Mr. Shelby.” she decided that she should go stand by him. He looked like he was going to strangle her. So as soon as they were close, she leaned forward and said softly. “Breathe, Mr. Shelby. It is Christmas Day! All is well.”

“F**k you.” He growled in her ear.

She shook her head and laughed at him. “God, you’re such a Scrooge.”

There was a brief second where he stared at her as if he didn’t know what to make of her. Actually, it was a minute, because he kept staring at her and she knew this, because when she turned to focus on Luca and Autumn…he was still staring at her. She knew this, because she could feel his gaze on her.

Chapter 15: Christmas surrender

This woman was pissing him the hell off.

“When you two get married,” Kate asked a little bit too cheerfully for his liking. “where are you going to live?”

Luca nodded at Autumn. “New York.”

Everyone protested loudly and Thomas rubbed his aching head. They’d been grilling Autumn about her relationship with Luca Changretta. She and Luca had 24 hours together and they'd seemingly memorize everything about each other. They knew each others birthday’s, favorite and least favorite foods, favorite colors, taste in books, music. Hell, they even knew their average grades in school! That made no f**king sense! He hadn’t even known Grace to that extent! So, how had they managed to get so close to each other so fast?!

“Hold on!” Arthur said above everyone else. “You’re not f**king moving to New York!”

“Yes, I am!” Autumn stated firmly. “That’s where Luca lives and that’s where his business is.”

Polly shook her head. “You can’t just---

“Luca and I talked in length about this already. “He asked where I'd like to live if we married. New York or here, I picked New York. My decision.” Autumn said firmly. “Not his.”

God, she was trying so hard not to appear like Changretta wasn’t dragging her away from here. He hated Changretta and he could see in Changretta’s eyes that he hated everyone. He didn’t understand how Autumn could even consider marrying a man who hated them all. It didn’t matter if Changretta looked at them hate to Autumn, just as long as he looked at her with love. She didn’t care at all. She didn’t care what he felt every time he looked at Changretta. Every time he looked at Changretta, he didn’t see a man in love with his sister. He saw his father, Vicente Changretta. That man’s face haunted him at night. He hated himself. He hated himself for being too f**king weak. He hadn’t been able to kill the man who’d ordered him to kill the man who’d given the order to murder his wife. Supposedly it was a f**king accident, he didn’t care. Grace, she was the love of his life and his heart ached to hold her every day. He ached to hear her laugh. God, he remembered the way she’d jumped on him and said, “Oh, Mr. Shelby!” After he presented her with that damn sapphire necklace. Oh, the way that she’d made love to him on that couch, it warmed what was left of his soul on the days that he thought of her.

“Is there a house,” Kate asked loudly, unintentionally drawing him out of his thoughts. “already to move into?”

“Mostly.” Thomas held a hand up, telling people to be silent so Luca could speak. “It’s built, but I’m having some final details done to the house.”

“Where’s it located?” Thomas asked.

“It’s a three-story mansion on Park Avenue.” Luca reached into his briefcase and pulled out the sketches. He handed them to Thomas. “I was showing her some of the final designs and she already put her input on the house. She can finish decorating it when she moves in. It’s ready, just needs a woman’s touch.”

Thomas nodded as he surveyed the pages. Yes, the house was exotically decorated. There was no mistaking that Luca Changretta was indeed a very wealthy man if he was buying chandeliers and marble. He recognized Autumn’s handwriting on some of the sketches. He passed the pages to Kate, who passed them on to Polly.

“Park Avenue is a rich place.” He stated before asking directly. “How much money do you make a year?”

Changretta didn’t even blink as he stated. “Around 150 million a year.” Autumn gasped and stared up at Luca in shock. So, she and Changretta hadn’t discussed everything. So, clearly things like money hadn’t been discussed. Typical Autumn, she’d talk about everything but things like money hadn’t even crossed her mind. “That’s a few million more than others because New York is where the importing goes.”

Autumn whispered. “You d-didn’t mention that much money.”

“I know, but,” he squeezed her hand. “I know you don’t care about money, mi cara. I have it all invested in gold, property and oil, so…if anything happens to me you’ll and the children will be well provided for.”

John shook his head as he mumbled. “One can hope.”

“Shut up, John.” Autumn snapped viciously before addressing Luca in a softer tone. “And your mother? You’ve made provisions for her as well?”

Luca nods. “Yes. I have. And I did call a friend in Italy, he’s going to go around looking for villa’s in Italy.”

“Villas?” Tommy asked. He didn’t like that idea of Autumn going to a different country. America was bad enough, but Italy was worse! “What for?”

Luca exhaled as he addressed Autumn. “When we were on our date, we discussed the possibility about retiring and moving to Italy. I’m having someone look into buying a villa for you.”

God, he couldn’t believe this! He shook his head as he blurted out. “What kind of f**king date was this?”

Autumn shook her head. “It wasn’t really a date. By the time we finished ordering our food, we were already talking about what our lives would be like when we got married. How many children we wanted and we already agreed on a name for the boy.”

“Which is?” Mrs. Changretta asked.

“We’re going to name him Vicente Angelo,” just hearing Luca say that name made his blood boil. Autumn, she didn’t even care! “after my father and brother.”

Everyone looked at them with suspicion. “You heard him say that,” John asked. “And you didn’t find that f**king suspicious?”

“Angelo and Vicente are common names.” Autumn stated.

“We would have gone into details, but,” he exhaled. “Autumn asked me what if she had a daughter first, so, we started talking about girl names.”

Everyone just stared at them and Thomas shook his head. They were…insane! Autumn and Luca, nothing that they f**king said or did made sense! “No one…f**king talks about stuff like that on first dates.”

“They just didn’t play around and talk about the little things. They decided to discuss all the little things that build a foundation for a good marriage.” this woman…she really, didn’t know how to f**king shut up!! he closed his eyes, rubbed his brows and prayed for patience before he dragged this woman upstairs and f**ked her! “Come on! When you know you know! It happens sometimes. Lightning strikes!”

“And that’s how people wind up dead.” he stated. Lightning killed on contact.

“That what killed all sense of feeling in you Thomas Shelby?” Kate sassed, infuriating Thomas for a moment. God, he was going to tie her to that bed tonight!  “I’m sure you both discussed how many children you’d have.”

 “Four.” They said in unison. Autumn cleared her throat. “Two of each.”

“How will you raise the children?” Mrs. Changretta asked

“Catholic.” He said. “We’re of the same religion, Mama.”

“Good.” She crossed her arms. “They won’t be heathens.”

Luca sharply reprimanded Mrs. Changretta. “Mama.”

Autumn spoke up quickly, trying to smooth things over. “Luca’s going to teach me Italian and we’re going to go send them to a school down in the Italian section of New York. I'd like them to acknowledge their Italian heritage.”

He shook his head as he stated. “Boy, did you two talk everything out.”

“When I saw her,” Luca said. “I saw the most beautiful gift from God. You dragged her away from me once. But when we found each other again…I was ready to learn everything that I could about her. We talked all night. There was no subject that was too unimportant to us.”

After a moment, John asked. “What about divorce?”

“There won’t be a divorce.” Autumn said tightly. “I'd rather stay miserable in a marriage, especially since we want to have children.” he shook his head in disbelief and he was relieved to see that even Kate this time saw that Autumn had some stupid idea when it came to love and marriage.

Polly frowned. “Why the hell would you want to do that? That’s stupid Autumn!”

“Because she doesn’t want the children growing up without a father the way she did.” Luca stated. “I don’t want that for my children either.”

“What if he cheats on you?” john asked. John loved poking the bear by asking the questions that none of them wanted to ask out loud.

Luca shakes his head. “I don’t cheat and I would never, ever cheat on Autumn.”

“My son is a man of honor.” He doubted that Mrs. Changretta knew what Luca was talking about. All men, especially men with reputations of being ladies men, like Italians, all had a woman on the side. There was no way that Autumn would ever be able to satisfy a man like Luca Changretta forever. “He will not break his marriage vows.”

Luca glanced at Autumn as he told her firmly. “There will be no divorce for that reason. You are to be the only woman I am to take as my wife. If you wish to leave me at some point, I’ll allow it, but I will never divorce you.”

That…was f**king dangerous. No matter what anyone thought. If Autumn wanted out, she needed to be able to get out. “I wouldn’t want you to.” She was an idiot!! He should have married her off to Alfie Solomons years ago! “Promise me…that no matter what happens, that we’ll work it out. That you don’t care how many years it takes, that you won’t give up trying to make it right.”

“I swear it, before these witnesses” Changretta said somberly as if her were making a vow. “No matter what, I’ll make our marriage work.”

“What if she says she doesn’t want you to f**k her?” John asked, causing everyone to jump. “You gonna make her anyway?”

Luca glowered at him. “Why you---

“Luca would not.” Autumn cut in, her cheeks growing red. “He’s very cautious and gentle with me. He’s always asking if I’m alright, if something hurts or if it’s too much. If I asked him to stop, he would. No questions asked.”

He doubted that. Luca got Autumn to give him her virginity on their first ‘date’. He knew how to control her.

“I care about her.” Luca said lightly. “I get my pleasure, watching her enjoy herself. My fulfillment comes last.”

 “God,” Kate said with a tinge of regret in her voice. “I almost wish you had another brother.”

“He’s dead.” Mrs. Changretta said bitterly. “They killed him.”

Kate exhaled sharply as she said. “I’m sorry. There’s such a shortage of good men around, it would have been nice to have one more in this world.” Her voice broke for a moment and he looked to see her on the edge of tears. That caught him off guard for a moment. Kate didn’t seem like the cry unless she was in extreme pain and nothing that anyone had said should have moved her to tears. “Men don’t care who they hurt…just as long as they’re satisfied.” Kate stood up abruptly and quickly left the room. “Excuse me.”

This time, he let her go. He didn’t know how to handle Kate when she was like this. It was foreign. Like being handed a spear and told to fight with it after having no training. It was beyond him.

“Did someone hurt her?” Changretta asked.

He had no clue, he doubted that she was referring to him. He hadn’t done anything to her. Yet. “Yeah.”

“Who?” Luca inquired.

Changretta was starting to piss him off with his f**king gallantry. “She won’t say.”

Autumn exhaled as she said quietly. “I hope you find out. She’s a nice girl.”

Thomas rolled his eyes. “She’s f**king mad.”

“I like her.” Autumn said.

Thomas used that opportunity to change the subject. “You’re f**king mad. Running off with Changretta after knowing him only one minute, coming back f**king engaged and running off with him to New York.”

Autumn held his gaze as she said. “I’ve waited a long time to be happy Thomas. I knew just as surely as I know that the sun will rise and set each day. I’m not waiting.”

There was no arguing with her. He could forbid it and have Changretta thrown out of the house. Or, he could just shoot him in the head, right here, right now and that’d devastate Autumn. She’d never forgive him or the others. She was a sensitive girl and he didn’t know what killing Luca Changretta would do to her. This was one battle that they wouldn’t win. He’d lost this one and he hated losing.

Thomas studied her a long time and then turned to that Italian bastard. “Her family is here---

“We’re going to live in England from October to February.”Changretta stated. “I already have a residence in London. I’m going to show her the house tomorrow.” He knew what Thomas needed to hear. "I'll not keep her from her family, but you have to accept that I'm her husband."

They’d still see her. If there was trouble, there was a time and place to kill Luca, not matter what. Hopefully by then, autumn would be over whatever infatuation that she had with Luca. He stuck his hands in his pocket and inquired. “Address?” Luca hesitated and he exhaled. “Write it down. We’ll all want to see.”

“Alright.” Luca turned around and wrote down his address on a piece of paper. “We’re getting married there. I have the staff preparing the house now.”

The wedding was soon, like it or not. He’d make his ‘mistake as Polly put it with his Grace. If Autumn wanted to make it with Changretta, he wasn’t going to stop her. He moved to his wall safe and opened it. “Tommy?” Arthur asked. “What are you doing?”

Tommy didn’t answer. He didn’t approve. He thought Autumn was making a huge mistake, but he wanted her to feel like she’d be able to come to him for help if Luca didn’t turn out to be the prince charming that he presented himself as. He exhaled as he threw the money on the desk. He leaned forward for a moment and exhaled as he said. “That’s 25,000 thousand pounds.”

Luca shook his head. “I don’t need any money---

“The family of the bride always pays for the wedding.” Thomas said simply, causing Autumn to inhale sharply. “She gets a dowry of 10,000 pounds.”

Luca exhaled as he said. “I’ll put it in her account, along with 1 million for her to access.”

Thomas nodded and then he said. “We should discuss business.”

“I’ll talk to Sabini, the moment she is my wife, you become family.”

“He sent an assassin here to kill me yesterday.” Tommy stated as he studied Changretta carefully for any signs that he’d known about any of this. He didn’t see anything that made him look guilty. “I killed him first.”

Luca nodded. “I’ll have Sabini over tomorrow when you visit. Make sure, that he understands the hazards of what’ll happen if he raises a hand against you.”

Thomas nodded. “Agreed.”

Luca inhaled as he said. “I know, you have a liquor business and one with Alfie Solomons. We will discuss that after the wedding. To do so before is in bad taste.”

That was suspicious. “Why?”

“Because I will not make it sound as if we’re agreeing to allow this marriage only if this business agreement is to both our satisfaction.” Luca stated. “This marriage is for love. In this one particular instance, there will be pleasure first and business later.”

Thomas Shelby stared him down. Changretta, to his credit, genuinely appeared to be more interested in Autumn than anything else. The way he spoke, implied he was a bit more of a romantic than a businessman. Great for Autumn, but that was very bad for a gangster.. “Agreed.”

Luca hesitated before asking. “However, I will ask that you consider letting the families that were displaced from the south of the city to be allowed to return to their homes.”

Thomas shot him a dark look before stating. “I’ll think on it.”

“Alright, then.” He hesitated before extending his hand. “We have a deal?”

He looked at Changretta’s hand, contemplating chopping it off for a moment. But then the door to the library opened and Kate walked in. She inhaled and leaned against the door, looking at him with that silent, judging expression that gnawed at him.  He nodded and reluctantly shook Changretta’s hand. “We have a deal.”

Autumn exhaled in relief. “Thank you, Tommy.”

“I don’t like it.” He said lowly. “But I have a bit more respect for him than I did for Freddie.”

“Freddie saved your life!” Ada snapped.

“And he also snuck around behind our backs.” Tommy reminded her. “Knocked you up before getting married without us. Just saying Ada, took a bit of guts to walk on in here and talk to us like this.” He exhaled as he realized that he did mean this. Did he trust Changretta or want him to marry Autumn? No! But he admired him for walking into the house.. “I don’t like that you’re taking her all the way to America, but…Autumn’s not like this. She’s quiet. She doesn’t act like this. So…if you brought this side out, it must be right. Her marriage…her choice or mistake to make. Time will tell.”

Luca simply nodded. “Grazie.” He turned to Autumn who had her hands over her mouth. “We’re getting married.”

Autumn practically jumped into his arms. He turned away, unable to watch the two of them as they held onto each other, frantically kissing each other. His eyes fell on Kate, she had her arms crossed around her waist. She had a slim waist, perfect breasts, smooth skin and rich hair. He was looking forward to exploring every inch of her tonight. And he’d be starting with that bratty mouth of hers.

Chapter 16: Christmas Party

“Thank you,” Luca said as he extended his hand towards her. “it was very brave of you to go in there and point a gun at Thomas Shelby.”

“Or foolish.” she said. “But…john needed to be taught a lesson and I wasn’t going to let all of them beat you up for defending your fiancee. Even if you did go a mite overboard on him.”

“i only broke the hand that he put on her.” he said calmly. “Had he been any other man than her brother, I’d have killed him.”

Kate exhaled as she nodded. “Somehow, I believe that.”

Autumn, slipped her hand into Luca’s arm as she inhaled. “I’d like to invite you to come to our wedding this Sunday.”

Kate stared at her in shock. That was a complete surprise and out of the blue! She shook her head as she said. “I’m sorry, I’m not sure that’s appropriate.”

“i can ask Thomas.” Autumn said softly. “I’d really like you to be there, especially after the way you helped us today.”

She shook her head. “Really, I did nothing.”

“You did everything.” luca said. “Truly, they weren’t about to listen to anything we said. You got them to discuss terms!”

Autumn exhaled as she said. “Our families will always be awkward together, but,” she smiled at Luca. “we’ll make our own family. Won’t we?”

Luca nodded. “In two days, my love.”

These two were definitely head over heels. Almost sickeningly at times, the way that they looked at each other and could read each others minds. God, she remembered the way that she could do that with john. At least, she thought she could at one point. But that was a long, long time ago and he was dead now.

The library door opened, tattling that Thomas had finally finished whatever top secret phone call he was on. “Tommy!” autumn called. He let out a sigh as he walked over. “Can Kate have Sunday off, to come to the wedding? Please?”

Thomas frowned and looked at her. “Why?”

“We’d both like her there.” luca said simply.

Kate shook her head. “I can’t leave my little sister.”

“Bring her alone.” Autumn said. “Children are always fun at a wedding.”

Personally, she thought children shouldn’t be allowed at a wedding, but this wasn’t her wedding. So, what did she know? She cleared her throat as she said. “I’m sorry, I don’t wish to be rude, but…I don’t have anything suitable to wear at a wedding in London.”

“I'll cover it.” Thomas said as he shot her a telling look. “You’ll pay me back.”

Oh, she bet that she would. However, now she had no excuses to off hoer them anymore. She nodded and said. “Thank you. I’d be honored to attend.”

Autumn’s face lit up. “Thank you! I’m so glad!”

Luca ran his hand over Autumn’s shoulder. “Mi amore, we must go. I want to show you our home.”

“Yes.” Autumn hugged Thomas really quickly. “Merry Christmas!”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

he watched as she took a hold of Luca's hand and he led her out to the car. She watched as Luca guided her around puddles, opened the car door and tucked a blanket around Autumn before closing the car door and hurrying around. His mother was already in the front seat and looking stone-faced. While she wasn’t pleased with the arrangement, she was at least attempting to make an effort to be happy with Luca. As the car pulled away, they saw Luca kissing Autumn in the backseat. God, she felt so alone right now. She’d been alone for a long time. But, she hadn’t realized just how lonely she felt now when the war was on. She’d led a busy life. She’d had a father, a loving fiance and she’d felt useful. Now, she’d lost her childhood home, her fiance and father were dead. She now would spend several months in the bed of a man who had some kind of issue that he needed to settle. For some reason, he needed her to deal with whatever it was that was troubling him. She didn’t really care. She had no feelings to hurt. He could f**k her at his leisure. She was already dead inside.

“If any harm comes to her,” he says darkly. “I f**king blame you.”

She rolls her eyes. “She would have run off and married him regardless. She didn’t need any influences from me.” she turned towards him.”You needed to agree to the marriage so that if something went wrong, she might feel comfortable enough confiding in any of you. If she ran off, you might never see her again. Besides, as questionable as their views on this marriage is---

“Questionable?” He glowered at her. “She’d rather stay married to him than get a f**king divorce!”

“Because of your father, for some reason.” she said. “You’d know that better than I.” he just glowered at her. “It can’t be helped. They both had absent fathers and want better for their children. Does it sound stupid? Definitely! But we’re not them! So, we can’t judge what works for them in their marriage!”

He shakes his head. “F**k. Sunday!” he exhaled as he rubbed his brow. “They’re really, getting married on Sunday.”

She nodded and whispered. “Yeah.” she hesitated before saying. “Thank you, for letting me go.”

“Her wedding. Her choice. Don’t thank me.”

“God, lighten up for just one minute!” She said as she closed the front door. “It’s christmas day.” she exhaled as she said. “Charlie’s been asking for you. So, go see him.”

The phone rang and he said. “I’ll get to him.”

As he walked back to the library, she shouted after him. “Don’t be surprised if one day you find him leaving the house with a suitcase, fully grown and you’ll have no idea how that happened!”

He closed the door on her and she rolled her eyes at him before going back to the parlor where everyone was celebrating with their kids. When she entered the room, charlie looked up for his father and his eyes lost a little bit of that glow. God, charlie loved his dad so much. It hurt to watch him neglect him like this. She beckoned for him to come over to her and he did. She picked him up and held onto him. Oh, he was heavy but, this occasion called for him to be held. Charlie rested his head on her shoulder and she leaned her back against a pillar so she had some support holding him. Within five minutes, he was snorting loudly, which caused everyone to chuckle quietly.

She shook her head and whispered. “I’ll go put him up for a nap.”

Polly nodded. “He’s had a busy day.”

She moved carefully out of the parlor and moved to the stairs. Thomas was coming out of the library and their eyes met for a second. She shot him a look of disapproval before heading up the stairs, carefully supporting Charlie's head. By the time she made it up the stairs, her shoulders were killing her. Still, she got charlie on the bed and covered him with a blanket. He was such a sweet boy. It was hard not to have feelings for him, especially with such an absent father.

When she went back down to the parlor, she wasn’t surprised to find Thomas had gone back into his ‘fortress of solitude’ otherwise known as the library. She retreated to a corner and silently observed the family. She could feel Polly watching her and studying her, as if she were looking for an opportunity to get her alone. Kate made a note not to get caught by Aunt Polly, because she would drill her. Charlie had gotten up after only an hour nap. He instinctively seemed to know that this would probably be the last time that he’d be able to play with kids his age for a long time. It wasn’t until dinner and Thomas joined the rest of the family that she saw what Autumn meant as to Thomas being the worst. He was nothing like everyone else. He barely ate anything and he was faking clearly for Charlie's sake. Charlie was the only person that he engaged with throughout the entire dinner. He made small talk with his family. His words were half-hearted when compared to their lively words.

There was a knock at the door halfway through the dinner and he excused himself. She spotted him carrying a big box upstairs to his room before returning downstairs again. He seemed in a slightly better mood, but for the like of her, she couldn’t understand why. After dinner, she helped the staff clear away the table. While the family had been eating, she’d focused on cleaning up the parlor and she’d even gotten into the library to clean up the broken glass. When it was 10:00, Thomas said it was time for the kids to go to bed and all the adults took it as their cue to leave. The direct Shelby's hugged him and his aunt and sister said they loved him. He couldn’t say it back. She’d never noticed this about him before. She then thought back to the first time that she’d gotten into his bed, how he’d said he was a soldier. She’d forgotten about that for some reason. He seemed almost impenetrable, unmovable that it hadn’t occurred to her that he, like the dozens of others had returned from the war with scars that couldn’t be healed.

She was tired, so she went up the stairs to get into bed. She decided to just put on a nightdress, she was cold and it wasn’t worth freezing to death just to taunt him. She got under the rich, warm covers with a sigh. She was exhausted and sleep rapidly claimed her. Tomorrow, she’d try to talk to him and see if there was a way to resolve this…anger or whatever was going on between them because it was exhausting.

The light clicked on and she burrowed further under the covers. That was typical of Thomas. His house, his lights. He didn’t care if she was asleep or not. Suddenly, the covers were yanked off her!

Kate’s eyes flew open and she found herself staring up into the angry blue eyes of Thomas Shelby! And by angry, he was absolutely furious! Now, unlike the time before, he was actually angry at her!! what had she done now?

He reached for her and before she could react, he grabbed a hold of the front of her nightdress and ripped it open! She screamed and scrambled back, her heart pounding in her throat. Thomas dove on top of her and covered her mouth! She shouted and tried bucking him off her, but damn it he was heavy! She went to scratch his eyes out and he caught her one hand. He ignored her other arm as he stared her down.

“I’m not,” he grunted as he used his elbow to smack her hand away from his face. “going to f**k you Kate.”

“What?” she garbled from behind his hand. This, made no sense! What was he doing? he’d just barged in, ripped the bed covers and her dress off her like he was going to!

He shook his head as he said. “I said, I wouldn’t f**k you and I meant it.” she relaxed a little bit. “However,” ok, here it comes. “you didn’t say that I couldn’t do other things do you.” he released her mouth and ran his hand slowly down her throat. “So, tonight, we’re going to try some other things. Alright?”

She wasn’t sure that this was a good idea. He was in a mood, that was clear. But he’d had a difficult day with his sister and family. He was probably missing his wife too. He hadn’t hurt her so she instinctively knew that whatever happened tonight would be fine. He’d just stay unpredictable with his mood swings. She exhaled and nodded at him.” Alright. Whatever you want, Mr. Shelby.”

The moment those words left her lips, she had a feeling that she’d made a mistake. The way that his eyes lit up, told her that she’d given him permission for something and she had no idea what that was.

Chapter 17: Christmas 'gifts'

he studied her for a good minute, then he got off her. She inhaled deeply as he grabbed a hold of her nightdress. He finished ripping it all the way off her, leaving her only in her underwear. “On your knees.” he ordered her firmly. “Now!”

Her jaw dropped at his words. “Excuse me?”

“You just said,” he stood up and removed his vest and let it fall to the ground. “that I could do whatever I wanted to you.”

God! Why had she said that? “I-I thought that,” she stammered. “that you, that it’d be something like yesterday.”

He nodded as he removed his cuff links, slowly and methodically. Almost as if he were a surgeon preparing for surgery. “That was the original idea. Then you had to open that f**king mouth of yours---

“But---

“not to mention,” he cut her off sharply. “you pulled a gun on me twice, today!!”

Ok, now she was seeing the error of her ways. “I was trying to---

“You made Arthur and me stand there,” he half-roared. “while Luca Changretta, broke my brother’s arm!!”

Her jaw dropped! “It was a fair fight---

“No, it f**king wasn’t!!” He shouted in her face before he grabbed her by the throat! She gasped and grabbed a hold of his wrist as he threatened her. He jerked her chin up and said. “If you EVER talk like that to me again in front of my family…the deal is off. I don’t care how much pain you’re in, but I will f**k you raw and I will keep f**king you. Do you understand me?”

she nodded as she whispered hoarsely. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.”

“Good.” he released her throat and said. “Get on your knees.” she inhaled and did as he said. She had no choice. She sat there, waiting as he undid his shoes, removed his socks and then his belt. Her heart beat faster as she watched him set the belt off to the side. She didn’t know what he was going to do with it. In the mood he was in he could either tie her up with it or hit her with it. At the moment, she wasn’t sure what would be worse. “I’m warning,” he stated as he undid his trousers. “don’t bite me.”

She nodded. “Understood.” however, when he dropped his garments and she came to eye level with his growing erection, she wasn’t so sure that she’d be able to keep from biting him. Yes, he’d been in her, but…she wasn’t sure how she’d be able to get him in her mouth! She inhaled as she said quietly. “I-I haven’t---

“i know.” he placed his hand on her head, fisting his hand in her hair as he stepped closer so his cock was pressed against her nose. “You’re going to open your mouth and take me in.” ugh, that sounded disgusting. “Remember how I had you use your hand on my cock yesterday?”

“Yes.” she fought to keep from hissing.

He nodded. “Do that with your tongue. Use your lips on my cock, do not use your teeth. Keep your throat relaxed and if you fight,” he nodded towards the bed. “the belt is there for a reason.”

She glowered at him. “I’m not going to fight!”

“You’ve walloped me before, so,” he exhaled he said. “I figured you could use a reminder. Now, open your mouth and lick, starting with the tip.”

She knew why he was doing this. He was paying her back for her behavior today. Until this very moment she hadn’t realized just how badly she’d crossed him. She’d humiliated and embarrassed him in front of his family with her passion. There was no point in explaining why she’d gotten so emotionally involved, not without crying. He did not deserve her smiles, so she wasn’t going to allow him to witness her tears. She opened her mouth and did as he said, licking him slowly from tip to base. She didn’t want to go to the base. But his hand in her hair made it clear that she had nowhere else to go.

“Just like that.”

She said nothing. What a f**king way to spend her Christmas. On her knees, with her mouth open. Fine, let him do his worst! There was nothing that he could do to break or hurt her! She was already broken! He kept guiding her head and tongue for several seconds as he got harder. She tried postponing the inevitable, but Thomas wanted to teach her a lesson. It was her mouth that had committed the crime, so her mouth would pay since he couldn’t bend her over anything and f**k her.

Her lips slid over his cock and her ears cracked from the pressure. He was wide. All her brain could scream and wonder was how the hell she’d been able to take him between her legs?! he hit the back of her throat and she instantly gagged and tried to push him away. He released her head long enough to grab her hands. “Don’t fight it Kate.” he reminded her hoarsely as he pumped in and out of her mouth, hitting the back of her throat again. “Don’t f**king fight it.”

She wanted to, but couldn’t. he released one of her hands and twisted the other back in her hair. She let out another cry as she gasped and sputtered on his cock. He showed no mercy as he pumped in and out of her mouth. He hit the back of her throat each time, purposefully hitting her gag reflex, each time. He wasn’t being rough. Well, he wasn’t gentle, but Thomas Shelby wasn’t a gentle man, so this was as gentle as he got in his impatience.

Then…he went still. Something changed. She glanced up at him as he thrust forward, surprising her and nearly knocking her over. His hand in her hair prevented her from moving. She let out a cough and he said. “Relax Kate, relax your throat.”

She didn’t understand! She didn’t understand what he wanted! Suddenly, he pushed his cock again and her throat resisted him again. However, he must have felt something different this time. For he pushed…and broke through whatever resistance there had been! It didn’t tear, it just…relaxed and stretched somehow. Kate let out a muffled scream as Thomas pushed her head up his cock! His cock had now long passed her mouth and was now nestled in her throat! When her nose touched his abdomen, he let out a curse. He held her there while she struggled to breathe while her nose rested against his skin. After a moment, he spoke.

“Oh f**k! f**k!” she snuck a glance up at him, nearly permanently crossing her eyes. He…was enjoying this! Of course he was! This was the kind of thing that a man would enjoy! “F**k, you feel good! So f**king good!”

Before she could say a word, Thomas moved forward, knocking her off balance so she was sitting on her arse! Thomas, he kept thrusting in and out of her! He would thrust deep into her throat, withdraw to her mouth and then thrust back into her throat! She was having a hard time breathing and the room was growing fuzzy around her. She finally realized that she had to breathe through her nose and that helped. Thomas, wouldn’t stop! He was half mad! She grabbed a hold of his wrists as she began to slowly and mentally drown. It wasn’t painful, fortunately, but it was scary as hell. She could barely breathe and tears were running down her cheeks. She did catch on quickly to what he wanted, but he wanted to hear her and he enjoyed hearing her choke and gag on his huge cock.

When he grew close, his whole body tensed and THAT filled her with panic. She let out a sob as she braced herself. Thomas grabbed a hold of her hair and swore violently. “F**KKKKK!!!”

With that he came and violently flooded her mouth. He’d come in her before, but, it was nothing this extreme. Her cheeks bulged and she was rapidly forced to swallow him down. He had a salty, yet slightly bittersweet taste. She sat there, stunned and in shock as his seed trickled down the corners of her mouth. He was breathing heavily and he looked …well, he actually was relaxed. She could see it in his face and his body language. He exhaled and leaned forward, thrusting past her throat again, causing her to gag and cry out.

“F**k, sorry.” He withdrew from her mouth and pulled her to her feet. She inhaled deeply, trying to ignore the taste of him and wine in her mouth. “You,” he let out an exhale which almost sounded like a laugh to her. “you can buy yourself and your sister a dress for the wedding. Nothing over 500 pounds!”

Wow. She was supposed to be grateful for that, she supposed! Her throat ached! She hadn’t noticed it completely when he was thrusting madly in and out of her mouth! The way he spoke to her just now, the way he laughed at her…he knew she’d never done that before and he’d still…he’d still done that to her! She couldn’t help herself…she spit in his eyes. Her spit had his semen and she had to admit it gave her great satisfaction to watch it trickle down his face.

He stilled and he looked at her. For a long time they stared at each other. Both of them naked. He stood there, cold, unemotional…and calculating in his body language. She’d done it again. Her damn temper had gotten in the way. He might have been done with her, but now…he decided to go further with her. He exhaled as he said. “I’m taking a bath. You will join me.”

She decided to apologize to him. Mr. Shelby was a sexual mastermind. He could put her body through hundreds of things without actually penetrating her! He could do things to her that she’d never even dreamed of! “Mr. Shelby---

“Now!” he shouted, causing her to jump.

She bit back a cry as she rasped. “Yes, mr. Shelby.”

“Get a drink first.” he said as he turned on the water in the tub. “Pour a whiskey. Two.”

“Yes…sir.” she squeaked.

She moved to the desk, vexed to find her hands shaking. She poured him one and then one for herself. Her hand was shaking violently as she lifted her hand to her lips. She wasn’t scared of him. She hadn’t been scared of anyone, not really for a long time. She was unsure but…she didn’t like that he was sparking…emotions in her. She was dead. She felt nothing. She took a sip and the warm whiskey burned, yet soothed her throat. She hissed and then took another large gulp. Yes, she’d need more. She refilled her glass and then walked into the bathroom. The water was at the halfway mark. Thomas was already inside and he held his hand out for the glass of whiskey. She handed it to him and he took it before ordering her. “In the water.”

She nodded as she got in. The water…was actually nice. She inhaled as she sat on the opposite end of the tub, the shallow side. He shook his head as he said. “Come here.”

She shook her head. “I’m here.”

“For 40 pounds a f**k,” he reminded her. “you’ll do as I ask.” those cold blue eyes stared through her as he said. “Now, come here.” she inhaled as she moved towards him. He studied her, with the cold emotion of a hunter who had his prey in sight. He nodded at her and exhaled. “Put your back to me.” that put her on edge. His cock…it’d be against her back entrance. Is that why, he wanted her in the water? Would it hurt less if he were to push into her? His thumb, it had hurt enough. “Do what I said Kate!”

She turned around as he said. His free hand snaked around her waist and he yanked her against his flaccid cock. She whimpered as she begged hoarsely. “Please, don’t.”

“Quiet.” he took a long drink as he said. “You said, I could do whatever I wanted to you, my little whore.” she shook her head as he said against her skin. “It is Christmas… and I intend to take my pleasure with you.”

Before she could say another word, he thrust a finger into her and she jumped, nearly dropping her whiskey glass. She exhaled in relief. It wasn’t her back entrance he was fondling, it was her vagina. Thank God for that! She inhaled as she prayed that’s where he stayed. Yes, he’d given his word that he wouldn’t take her, but if he did f**k her there, she didn’t mind as long as he didn’t take her from behind.

He set his whiskey on the little table that he’d placed by the head of the tub. He ran his other hand down her neck to her breasts and nipples. He tormented them, teased them by pinching and pulling at them until they were fully erect. Kate bit her lip, trying not to let out a sound as he’d commanded. He grabbed her hand and guided it back around his cock which was still aimed at his entrance. She knew what he wanted. She curled her fingers around him and began to stroke and pump him. He continued to thrust his fingers into her. He started slowly, then he was f**king her fast and furiously on them. Because she was in the water it didn’t hurt her, but he was going deep inside her, stretching her out, preparing her for January. She didn’t care. If this was the worst that he could do, she was fine with it.

Suddenly, Thomas pushed her forward so she was on her stomach in the tub. She scrambled to grab a hold of the edge and he locked himself on top of her. She gasped as he held onto her waist as she felt him behind her, now fully aroused. She shook her head.. “Don’t!”

“Like I said Kate,” she felt him line himself up at her sore entrance and she began to fight him. He grabbed her and pushed her into the edge of the tub. “I own, this f**king c*nt of yours!”

“No, you f**king don’t!” She shouted at him.

He covered her mouth as he pressed the head of his cock in her…and came in her vagina. She let out a moan of despair as Thomas filled her. It had just been the head. He’d ignored the back entrance and he hadn’t f**ked her. This…man knew how to bed the rules and agreements without breaking them.

“January first Kate.” He rasped in her ear. “I’m going to f**k you, every hour, on the hour.” She nearly started crying at those words. He was going to kill her. “I won’t stop and you will take me. You will f**k me back. You’ll thank me and tell me that you like it. You’ll beg for more! Do you understand me?”

She nodded as she whispered. “Yes.”

“Good.” He exhaled as he said. “Out of the tub Kate.” She got out numbly, as if she were a puppet with it’s strings cut.  She reached for a towel and they both dried off. She kept the towel around her as she moved to go find another nightdress. “There’s a box on the floor in the room. Open it up, put everything that in there on and the get in the bed, Kate.”

She stared up at him. “W-what?”

“I was ready to stop with you after the tub..” Those cold blue eyes of his glinted. “But you just had to go and spit in my eye.” he continued drying off. “Now, go put everything on.”

He seemed to have something planned. Fine. He could play whatever game he wanted, but he wasn’t going to win whatever game it was. She nodded. “As you wish.”

She stepped out of the room and moved towards the large box. It was a plain box. Nothing special about it. It wasn’t even tied shut. She opened up the box…and her heart stopped.

It…was her mother’s wedding dress!

She gasped as she pulled it out. It was the same beautiful dress that she recalled. It had broken her heart that it had been lost forever. It had been altered for her to wear when john came back from the war. But john never came back.  John had died. She could now pass this dress to Rosemary! One piece of their family history was intact.

“Stop staring at it Kate.”

She turned towards him, hope rising in her chest. “Y-you found my mother’s wedding dress?” she thought he was angry with her, but, he’d found her mother’s wedding dress and veil! If she’d known…she’d have taken his cock in her mouth a thousand times without even offering payment!

“Yes.” he moved towards the bed to fix the covers. “You’ll wear it when I f**k you tonight.”

Kate felt as if someone had dropped a bomb on her. She stared at him in shock. H-he wanted her…to wear her mother’s wedding dress…the dress, she’d nearly married john in…and then he…he was going to f**k her in it?? tears instantly started in her eyes. That, was beyond wicked and cruel of him.

She inhaled as she whispered. “T-this is my m-mother’s wedding dress.”

“I know.” He said coldly. “I don’t care.”

She looked at him and started to beg him. “Mr. Shelby, please---

“No one, will ever f**king love you again.” He stated coldly as he approached her. Those words…were like a knife and they hit her heart hard. She shook her head as he said darkly. “No one will ever marry you because no one marries a whore. A man might have had you after you let your John bed you, because he died. But me…you slept with over 200 times to pay off a debt from your father. This…is all you’re good for.” she didn’t’ want to listen to him. Didn’t want to believe him, but she knew that he was right. She could feel tears gathering behind her eyes. She hadn’t cried in so long. She couldn’t cry. If she cried…she’d never stop. “So put that dress and veil on,” he ordered lowly, get in that bed of yours, close your eyes and take your f**king Christmas present!” THIS was her Christmas present!? “You get a money bonus of course. But…this is as close to marriage as you’ll ever get and you know it! No man will ever wait for you at the end of an aisle or put a ring on your hand. You won’t ever wear this dress for anyone. So, might as well pretend for one night that you’re an actual bride and not the whore you are.”

She stood there. Every part of her was in shock. She felt as if he unloaded a full machine gun into her but she was too in shock to move. She did move though. She stepped carefully into her mother’s beautiful dress and took a moment to look at herself in it. He was right. She looked ridiculous in this beautiful dress. By accepting this job as his whore, she’d tainted and ruined herself beyond redemption. He waited for her to put the veil on and he took her hand, guiding her to the bed as if she were a bride. He turned the lights down and she was grateful for that. He couldn’t see the few tears that trickled down her cheeks as Thomas Shelby took her last ounce of self-worth. There was no fight in her. Thomas Shelby had won.

---

 

Chapter 18: The wedding

December 27^th, 1925

---

Today was the day that Autumn Shelby and Luca Changretta would be joined in holy matrimony.

Thomas had taken her, Frances, Rosemary and Charlie up to his house on the 26^th. They’d met at luca’s house and they’d been stunned. Luca, was as he’d stated, filthy rich. The house, it was absolutely beautiful. A three story mansion with marble flooring, crystal chandeliers and white walls that were covered with expensive artwork. Luca gave a grand tour that had she could see had Thomas Shelby seething. He was rich, but he’d never be as rich as Luca was and that was of comfort to her.

She watched Luca and Autumn together. He was everything that the Shelby men were not. He stood when a woman entered the room, any woman, even Rosemary. Autumn he paused his conversation to acknowledge her with a quick ‘Mi cara’ or ‘my love’. he’d always walk beside her, but pause to let her go through a door first. He’d open doors for her, help her in and out of her chair. It was the way he looked at Autumn though that made her hate them, even though she advocated for them to be together. He looked at her as if she were a queen. Not just any queen, his queen and he worshiped the ground that she walked on.

She remembered when john looked at her that way. Now no one ever would.

Right now, she was on her knees in the bathroom an hour before the wedding sucking off Thomas's cock again. He was making her deep throat him again, which was no surprise. He made her do it after they’d gone through Luca's mansion and now he was doing it before the wedding. He really, really hated Luca Changretta, but he loved his sister more. If she didn’t have his cock in her throat she’d admire him for putting things aside for her. But she felt nothing for this man. She didn’t feel anything anymore since Christmas day.

she spent the following day washing his dried seed out of her mother’s wedding dress. He’d come all over her several times. The first time, she’d been shocked. She’d expected him to just press himself between her legs and spend himself in her like he’d done in the bathtub.  The second time, she’d begged him not do that. She was sobbing and begging him not to ruing her mother’s wedding dress. She actually begged him to come inside her and he actually listened to her! He’d thrust inside her, but she was still so sore that she couldn’t stop a cry of pain. He’d withdrawn and she’d begged him to use her anyway. He didn’t. She was screaming at him to use her, to hurt her and to f**k her, but he came over her dress, face and even got her mother’s  veil. She lay there, stunned and dead inside with his semen on her face.. He then went to sleep after wishing her a ‘Merry Christmas’. she’d waited until she’d heard him sleeping before tiptoeing into the bathroom to let the dress soak in cold water. The stains didn’t come out. Even after ringing the dress out and bringing it up to London to continue to care for it, the stains were present. She was careful as she tested different cleaners because this dress was over 30 years old and one wrong cleaner on it and this dress would be ruined forever.

He was growing close, she could feel it. God. She wished that he’d just get it over with and come in her! She had to get dressed and she wanted to brush her teeth. At that moment, the door to her bedroom opened and she froze with him halfway down her throat. He frowned and paused as well.  “Kate?”Both their eyes widened at the sound of Rosemary’s voice. She popped off his cock and stood up, licking her lips before reaching for the glass of water that she’d poured before getting on her knees. Thank God she’d locked the door1. “Kate are you in here?”

He wrapped his arm around her and ordered. “Answer your sister.”

She inhaled as she stammered. “Y-yes? What is it Rosemary”

“Oh! Frances was leaving early with Charlie. May I go with her?”

“Y-yes.” she inhaled as Thomas began rubbing up against her hip. “Go ahead and have f-fun!”

“We will!!” She said with excitement. “Mr. Changretta said we could explore the garden.”

“Alright.” Thomas took her hand and wrapped it around his cock, instructing her to stroke it. “I’ll see you in 30 minutes.”

“Ok! Bye!”

Rosemary closed the door and she glanced at him as he made her vigorously stroke his cock. “Please---

 “F*k*!” Thomas pressed the head of his cock into her and came! She bit her lip, stifling the cry as he flooded her. He exhaled deeply. He’d taken to do this lately. Making her take his seed. If she wasn’t swallowing it, he was pushing it just into her. Not his whole cock, thank goodness. But it made her feel as if she were a female dog. She was his bitch and he was marking his territory. Her. “There you go.”

He breathed before giving her a territorial ‘kiss’ on her neck. It might as well have been a bite. She pulled her slip down around herself and washed her face. He sat down on the edge of the tub and watched her, casually pulling a cigarette from his coat. after washing her face she asked him. “Are you going to stay?”

“No.” he lit his cigarette. “Just waiting for the car to leave. Don’t want your sister bumping into me leaving your room.”

She nodded before going to the closet at the back of the bathroom. She’d bought a ‘cheap’ dress and shoes. She liked it though. It wasn’t even 100 pounds total, but, she’d felt somewhat pretty in it, which was saying a lot all things considered. It was a beautiful, emerald green dress with faux rhinestones. The saleslady had been able to find a pair of matching green heels for her to wear. She climbed into the dress and then pulled on the heels .the chiffon dress felt lovely on her. She didn’t have any jewelry, but that was alright. She wasn’t the one getting married. No one would be looking at her.

She walked out of the bathroom and Thomas coughed, choking on his cigarette. She glanced at him as he put it out. She decided to ignore him. He wasn’t going to die on cigarette smoke. She began brushing her hair, deciding to leave it down as she was running somewhat late. As she reached for the lipstick, Thomas stood up and she recognized that look in his eyes and she couldn’t help but beg.

“Don’t. please!” he frowned at her. “I’m already late! I can’t---

“Kate,” he held up a hand as he said. “I have to make a phone call. I’ll catch you tonight.”

She nodded. “Ok.”

She turned back to the mirror, feeling his eyes on her. “Is that all you’re wearing?”

She nodded. “Yes. Is there something wrong with it?”

He shook his head. “No.”

With that, he turned and left the room! She shook her head. She made sure to go lightly on the lipstick. He probably wouldn’t want lipstick all around him when she went down on him later. After a quick powder, she grabbed her purse and went to wait downstairs for him. He came out of the library and hustled her into the car to the wedding. But when she arrived, Polly Gray was waiting there with an emerald pendant for her to wear for the night. She didn’t know why he did that and frankly, she didn’t care. He probably didn’t want to be embarrassed by her.

The house was even more beautiful that she recalled. Luca had the house decorated in dozens of white roses. Autumn looked absolutely radiant in her white wedding dress as she walked down the aisle with Arthur, clutching her bouquet with holly. It didn’t escape her notice how Luca had a boutonniere of mistletoe in his lapel. The two of them…this ceremony confirmed their love and infatuation for each other. Luca tried kissing Autumn the moment her hand was placed in his, but Arthur stopped them. Everyone laughed when he told the priest to make the wedding quick because neither of them were going to wait. The ceremony was beautiful. They both spoke their vows with such love and conviction that it was clear that they were soulmates.

The first kiss…it took everyone’s breath away. When they kissed, they were the only two people in the world which made her heart ache. Afterwards, Autumn and Luca broke a glass which was supposed to symbolize how many years they were to stay married. The glass shattered into over a thousand pieces. If the glass was to be believed, their marriage was going to last for all eternity.

The wedding then moved to this large formal dining room. The table was laden with dozens of Italian foods. It was very laid back and everyone pretty much just grabbed a plate and picked what they liked. The party was full of Italian traditions. Apparently, when the guests clink the glasses, the bride and groom had to kiss each other. And Luca's Italian guests had him and Autumn kissing a lot. To the point that her entire family, even Kate was getting uncomfortable with the display. Luca, he was grabbing and pulling Autumn towards him with such passion that she was starting to get concerned that he’d push her onto the table and have his way with her right there!!

La giarrettiera! Someone shouted, causing Autumn and Luca to start laughing.

“What the f**k does that even mean?” Arthur asked loudly.

“Ah,” Luca Changretta removed his tie as he said. “I have to remove her garter!”

Kate’s jaw dropped in shock. All the Shelby men stared in shock at those words. “You what!?” Arthur shouted at him as Autumn dragged her chair in the middle of the room.

Autumn laughed merrily. “I’m married now Arthur, but,” she sat down and Luca knelt by her feet. “you might want to look away for this big brother.”

“What the,” Luca slid his hand up under Autumn’s skirt and Kate hastily scanned the room for Rosemary. Thank God, she wasn’t here! Arthur ducked and covered his eyes. “Whoa! Tommy!”

Tommy, however, wasn’t looking either. Someone started clinking the damn glasses again…while luca had his hand under Autumn’s skirt. All her brother’s started loudly protesting. Thank goodness john Shelby wasn’t here, he’d have hated this. Luca lunged at Autumn, trapping her in a deeply passionate kiss before standing up with her garter in hand while all the Italian guests whistled and cheered.

It was all such a family moment. She stood there, lost in the moment for a second as Luca and Autumn made their way to the center of the room. She glanced around the room and made eye contact with Thomas Shelby. He looked as miserable as she felt. However, there was something different in his eyes tonight. A different look, almost pensive and she didn’t understand it.

A cheer interrupted them and they turned to look at Luca and autumn. This huge bridal bouquet of holly and red roses came flying at her face. She caught it to prevent it from catching her dress, but failed! The thorns snagged on her chiffon and she exhaled as she tried to remove it without damaging her dress.

“Tommy!” Arthur said in disgust. “Tommy no!”

She looked up to see tommy was struggling to remove…Autumn’s garter from his cufflink. That made her nearly laugh. Men were so fussy about things, but pulling your sister’s undergarments off in public was a perfect kind of embarrassing. “Tommy! It’s good luck!” Luca explained merrily. “It means you’re the next one getting married!”

Tommy stilled at those words.

Her heart froze as she realized that she caught the wedding bouquet.

That meant, she was the next woman getting married.

If tommy was the next man…did that mean, that….

No!

Luca and Autumn Changretta could not have just cursed her and Tommy Shelby to get married to each other!

---

 

 

Chapter 19: Breakdown

She was going to be sick.

She threw the bouquet on the nearest table and fled the room. She went out one door and tried to catch her breath. She couldn’t breathe, even though she tried to; she couldn’t draw in a damn breath. She heard a door slam, but she didn’t care. She needed to get out of that room. She couldn’t take it anymore! She couldn’t watch Luca and Autumn anymore. The way that they looked at each other, touched each other and kissed each other. Luca, he was so gentle and loving towards Autumn that it made her heart ache desperately. She missed John. She missed the way he made her feel so much. She missed the life she’d led before the war! She exhaled deeply as she moved towards the fountain. She inhaled. Exhaled. Inhaled. Exhaled. What was wrong with her!? why the hell was she breaking apart?

“i hate f**king weddings.” she turned to see Thomas standing there. He was adjitated and she could see it by the way he was puffing on that cigarette. “The Italians have too many f**king customs.”

She exhaled as she nodded. “Same.”

“Weddings always make us think.”

“And feel.” She inhaled sharply as she tried to keep from crying. “You remember things you don’t want.”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

She bit her lip before talking. She had to talk. If she didn’t stop talking she was going to break down. She couldn’t afford to do that right now. “Your sister looks very happy.”

He nods. “Yeah.”

“He treats her good too.” he nods. “He loves her. Very much and he’s sweet too.”

“He’s a f**king pansy.” she rolled her eyes. “He talks too much.”

“Because he loves her and when a man really love the woman, he goes out of his out of his way to show that he cares.”

He studied her a long time and then he said. “You’re talking about John carter now. Not luca changretta.”

She didn’t want him to say john’s name. She shook her head as she said. “No, I’m not.”

“Yes. You f**king are.” he exhaled as he stepped towards her. He studied her closely. She knew what was coming and this time…she didn’t mind. He dropped his cigarette and stamped it out. He took her arm and then tugged her to the gazebo that was a short distance from from the house. “Come here.”

She’d never wear white. She’d never be a bride. By the time Thomas was done with her, every ounce of her would be f**ked to pieces. Who was she kidding? He’d f**ked her ragged already. He tugged her skirts up and she let him. He pumped his fingers inside her and she instinctively undid his trousers. He exhaled as she pulled his cock from his trousers. She wanted him inside her. She wanted it to hurt so she’d feel something other than the emotional pain that she was feeling now.

She guided him inside her and he paused. “Whoa. Hold on, you’re not----

“Don’t go fast,” she whispered. “and don’t hurt me.”

“Alright. I won’t.” He exhaled as he guided her head to his shoulder. “I’ve got you.”

She didn’t want him to be holding her. She wanted john to be holding her, kissing her and loving her. She didn’t want Thomas. She closed her eyes as Thomas thrust firmly into her. She inhaled sharply as he withdrew and then thrust back in. “Slowly.” she said quietly. “Slowly.”

He nodded. “Alright.”

He did. He moved slowly in her. For a moment, she felt like it was john. Thomas had never been gentle or slow with her before today. Today, it was a very melancholic day. She didn’t know what she needed. She exhaled as she murmured. “To the right.” he never really got the right spot inside her. He was always so fast and rushed,

“What’s that?” He asked.

“To the right.” She whispered. He shifted a little more over and she gasped as he finally hit the right spot inside her. She gasped as she grabbed a hold of his neck. “Yes. Right there.”

“There?” he breathed into her ear.

“Yes.” He withdrew and hit her right where she’d been aching to be touched. “There. Oh!”

Kate held onto him and clutched him tightly as Thomas thrust in and out of her, hitting that spot in her finally. She exhaled deeply as she whimpered, trying not to cry out his name. Suddenly, she flashed back and she was remembering the last time she’d made love with john. He was in his uniform and he looked so handsome. He was perfect. She remembered him looking down on her with such love in his brown eyes. The sun was shining down onto his rich brown hair. John, he loved her in pastel colors, like pink and yellow. She’d avoided those colors after he died. God, she remembered the day she’d been notified. John had no family, so if anything were to happen to him, she’d been listed as his next of kin. She’d gone to get her mother’s wedding dress let out a bit. She’d come back, to find him two soldiers waiting for her. After that…her life had gone to hell and she broke as she recalled the last time that she’d been touched with love.

That thought, it was enough to break her. This bubble, this great big bubble of pain was just growing inside of her. She wanted it to go away. She wanted anything physical but nothing emotional. Physical would heal over time, but the emotional always did way more damage. She whimpered and croaked. “More.”

To her shock…Thomas shook his head! “No.”

“Mr. Shelby, please.”

“No.” he exhaled deeply. “You can’t handle a proper f***k from me yet.”

She inhaled as she begged. “Please!”

He ignored her as she was starting to feel desperate. She inhaled as she grabbed him tighter. She needed more, but he wouldn’t give it to her. She needed pain, anything to give her a reason not to cry in front of him. He’d hurt her before. This man knew how to crush her soul. He wouldn’t do that this time and she was desperate for him to hurt her. By the time he finally came inside her, Kate was full out crying. She wanted to stop, needed to stop but couldn’t stop. He exhaled hotly as he tugged her deeper into the shadows, rocking his cock deeper into her. He held her tighter and they stood there, just holding each other. She couldn’t stop crying and when her sobs started becoming hysterical, he withdrew from her.

“Right.” he exhaled as he got his clothes in order. He tugged her clothes back in order before taking a hold of her. “I’m taking you home.”

Kate couldn’t stop crying. Thomas took her out the back gate as she was doubled over from her hysterical sobbing. They didn’t even go inside the house. He just bundled her off into the car! She couldn’t sit up. She was just sobbing into the middle seat cover with her head resting on the seat. Thomas said something to the driver that she didn’t hear or understand.

But when he touched her….something in her just snapped. She bolted upright and she punched him in the face!! he let out a surprised shout as he grabbed his nose! She kept punching him and she wouldn’t stop. He swore at her and he wrestled with her. His nose was bleeding down the front of his expensive suit. She screamed at him and bit his hand, hard!! he let out a howl and flipped her onto his stomach!

“What the,” she managed to elbow him in his chin before he pinned her hands behind her back. “what the f**k is wrong with you?!”

“Get off me!!” She shouted at him as the tears kept pouring down her face. “Get off me now!!”

“Kate---

“Don’t you DARE call me kate!!” She screamed at him. “You have NO right! You can’t use my given name! You have no right!! you’re not him! You’re not john!!”

His grip relaxed a little bit. “It’s the champagne and the wedding---

“i hate you!” She shouted. “Every time you touch me, you make me sick! If I didn’t owe you, I’d plunge a knife into your heart for free after the things you’ve done to me!”

He jolted on top of her. “What I’ve,” he grabbed her and yanked her upright. Oh! That man had the audacity to be angry with her! “YOU’RE the f**king whore who,” she spit in his eye again and he swore. “stop f**king doing that, or I’ll---

“You’ll what?” She shouted at him. “F**k me till I can’t walk again? That must make you feel like a BIG man, Thomas Shelby!”

He got indignant at that. “Oi! You didn’t tell me that I was---

“I didn’t have to tell John!” she shouted at him! “He saw if I didn’t like something! You don’t care!!”

“i am not your f**king John!” He snapped. “He is f**king dead1”

On a normal day, that would hurt her. But today, she was hurting and she didn’t care what she said or did to her. She inhaled as she demanded. “ Did your wife have to tell you that you were hurting her?” he went still. “Did you put your hands on her, the way you put your hands on me?”

“Shut up.” he warned.

“Did you push her down on her knees and make her choke on your f**king cock?”

“i said,” he shouted in her face. “to shut the f**k up!!”

“Did you hurt her?” She couldn’t shut up now. She couldn’t. “Did she like that? Did she like being treated the way you treat me?”

“You are NOT my f**king WIFE!!” He exploded in her face.

“NO I’M NOT!!” She shouted back at him. “But I’m still a person!! I’m human!!” they stared at each other, their breathing hard and the very air was charged with an explosive tension. She inhaled as she said rapidly. “I bet you never even raised your voice to her because you loved her that damn much!!”

“She was my wife!” He hissed at her, poisonous anger in his voice “You are nothing to me! She was everything!”

“i know that!” She spat. “I’m just a doll that you can f**k however you want! Who cares if you f**king break an arm or leg because it doesn’t have any feelings! And you know that I’ll let you do whatever it is you want to do to me because I owe you. But today,” her voice broke as she confessed. “watching Luca and your sister----

She couldn’t say the words right away. He was silent a moment before demanding. “What the f**k about those two??”

The words just came out and when they did, they were a scream that she’d been holding inside for more than ten years. “I miss John!!!” he just…froze. For a second, she thought that she thought understanding in those eyes of his, but she knew he wasn’t capable of it. The words, they wouldn’t stop coming. “I miss, being valued as a person! I miss…being loved and touched with kindness!” her voice broke as she started crying hysterically. “I hate being grabbed and just f**ked like a f**king whore! I hate being touched by you!! I hate know that YOU are the last man in the world who is ever going to touch me or be physical with me because I DESERVE BETTER!! But he’s gone!” She shouted at him. “He’s gone and I’m stuck here with you!!”

“Kate---

“And he’s probably looking down at me, thanking God that he never married me!!” She couldn’t stop. She really couldn’t stop! “I couldn’t even carry his baby safely---

He jolted as he stared at her. “Baby?” She gasped and covered her mouth. “Kate, you had a baby?”

She stared at him a long time before croaking. “I lost it. I lost…his baby.”

She’d never told anybody before. No one, apart from the doctor had known. She’d never told her father. She’d never told Rosemary, but she’d told him. She just stared at him for a moment before a guttural wail wrenched it’s way free from her soul and it would not be tamed. She couldn’t stop. She kept screaming and crying as she let everything she’d been holding back for ten years.

Thomas suddenly grabbed her and pulled her to his chest. She hit him with her fist several times and this time he let her. He let her hit and punch him as needed and the ride became a blur for her. She was exhausted when they arrived back at his house. The ride seemed to have taken hours. She then realized that he’d told the driver to drive around so she could get all of this out as privately as she could without anyone in the house knowing. Her eyes were so swollen that she could barely see through them. She’d broken two nails and her lip was bleeding. He was a mess. His suit was bloody, his handkerchief was gone, she’d ripped several buttons off his suit and his once groomed hair was a sight. As he helped her up the stairs and into the house, a strange thought occurred to her.

He’d held onto her the entire time and hadn’t let go for one moment.

Chapter 20: Making love to ghosts

Kate wasn’t aware of anything. She just moved where Thomas guided her. He guided her up the stairs and instead of taking her to her room, he took her to his. She knew what was coming. She expected it and it was alright.

RING!!

The phone in his room rang and he let her go. He moved towards the phone, and she moved towards the bathroom. He picked up. “Hello?” she began to wash her face, carefully removing the lipstick. “Yeah, she’s not feeling well. She was sick. I brought her back here.” another pause. “Had a doctor check her out. Yeah, she’s fine. She just needs some rest.” He shook his head. “No. I’ll just stay here. I think she’d want the kid to have fun with the other kid. I’ll see them when they get back. Oh, tell Frances that the kids can stay out as late as they want tonight. Yeah. Bye.”

He hung up the phone. It was going on 3:00. In 7 hours it’d be 10:00. a lot could happen in seven hours. She patted her face dry and then stepped out of the bathroom. Thomas had already removed his coat and vest. He was working on his final cufflink before adding his shirt to the pile. She knew what to expect. He knew that she was healed. No one would be back for seven hours, he could do whatever he wanted to her in this house and she didn’t care anymore. She exhaled as she undid the one button on the back of her dress. She’d instinctively bought a new slip to go along with this dress.

 She stepped out of her dress and her heels. She placed them on a chair before pulling her hair back. She could feel his eyes on her as she approached him. The slip was something that she’d figure he’d like. Lace front and a deep neck. So deep in the front that her nipples were showing. She inhaled as she unzipped his trousers and knelt before him.

He caught her hand. “Stand up. Stand up.” she frowned at him for a moment. Since when would a man like him turn her down when she was on her knees with her mouth open? She hated it, but he always looked at peace after she took him in her mouth. He exhaled and looked around. “Sit down.” to her complete shock and amazement…he moved her to sit in front of two chairs before his empty fireplace. He exhaled as he knelt and lit the fireplace. She watched him for a moment as he stirred the fire, only once it was a nice blaze did he stand up. He exhaled as he removed his shirt. She watched him as he moved back towards his desk and stripped down to just his shorts. Yes, there’d be sex at some point this evening, just not now. He poured two whiskeys and walked back. He extended a full glass, instead of his typical half-glass to her. “Here.”

She nodded and croaked. “Thank you.” she sipped at it. She shouldn’t love the taste of whiskey so much, but it was the only thing that seemed to dull all the pain that she felt inside her. For a while they said nothing to each other, they sipped their glasses in silence. When she got a quarter of the way through the glass, she set it on the table and croaked. “What would you like me to do?”

He didn’t even look at her. “I’d like you to stay in that chair and finish your whiskey.”

Ok. She didn’t understand. “Don’t you want me to---

“Kate,” he said firmly without looking at her. “drink the whiskey.” she picked up the glass and began to sip it. “Why didn’t you tell me that you lost a kid?”

She froze before stating. “I didn’t tell anyone. No one knew.”

He turned to her. “Your family---

“I lived in Oxford. Not Birmingham.” she said sharply. “The scandal would have ruined us.”

“Alright.” he exhaled. “So…no one knew.”

She bit her lip and croaked. “Just the doctor. He tried to save the baby, but…it happened the night I’d found out about John’s death.” she inhaled sharply as she whispered. “The drug…my dad’s doctor had given me…brought on early labor. I-I didn’t know I was pregnant. Not really. I was going on four months. I woke up around midnight…made it across town and banged on his door.” she inhaled. He tried, stopping the labor but…I’d progressed too far and at 4 months…the baby wasn’t able to survive. He died that night.” she took another drink. “The doctor patched me up, sent me home and he took care of the baby.” she was silent for a moment. “I couldn’t even take him with me to bury, so, he had to cremate him. That way…no one would know.”

He was silent a long time before asking. “Would it have mattered, Kate?”

She inhaled as she said. “If I were an only child, no. Not to me. But Rosemary needed to be protected as well. If I was damaged, she’d be tainted as well.” she shook her head before mumbling. “Look at me now. A personal whore to a millionaire gangster. All of a sudden…burying John’s baby wouldn’t have been so scandalous, now that I think about it.” she shook her head as she croaked. “Poor John.” he tilted his head as he looked at her. “Got shot in the head at Mons.”

“Chatty Carter.” He said quietly, causing her to look at him. He exhaled as he said. “That’s what the men called him. He’d talk, a lot. Sometimes there wasn’t enough anesthesia, so he’d talk to the men. Sometimes he’d talk to the point that you’d forget you were in pain and just want to smack him.”

She laughed softly as she said. “He could talk. He had a way with words.”

He nodded. After a drink he added. “The men respected him though. He refused his leave a lot of the time. He could get one every three months, being an office.”

She inhaled as she said. “He wouldn’t leave until a battle was done.”

He glanced at her. “He had you to get back to.”

“i wasn’t so very important.”

“Hmm,” he shook his head. “trust me. When you’re up to your knees in blood, mud and guts for weeks…a woman like you is all a man is thinking about.”

She shook her head as she whispered. “I don’t believe that.”

“That’s fine.”

She was silent for a long time before admitting. “There are days…I miss him so much that it hurts.”

He nods his head as he says. “I know.”

She inhaled sharply as she said. “He and my father must be looking down and being so disgusted at me, with how far I’ve fallen. My father always thought I wasn’t good enough for John. He was glad for the match. John was rich, an officer, but I’d never be good enough for him.”

He was silent for a long time, then he said solemnly. “If they could see what I do to you, they’d want to kill me.” she glanced at him as he lifted the glass of whiskey to his lips. “They wouldn’t judge you.”

“You don’t know my father.”

“Don’t need to know him.” he said simply. “Most fathers wouldn't take kindly to a man putting his hands on you the way I do, even if it is for business.”

“Business.” she said bitterly. “Only you, can make something that’s supposed to be special between two people sound as if a tooth is getting pulled.” he almost smirked at her as he nodded. There was another silence between them and then she asked him. “Why did you pick me?” He exhaled deeply and shifted the whiskey glass from one hand to the other in a rolling motion. “You didn’t have to hire me as your whore. Charlie needs a nanny. You could have offered me a full-time job, but you didn’t give me that opportunity. I have…no experience in comparison to what you’re used to. So,” she exhaled before asking shakily. “why do you want me so much? You’re rich enough to pay for any woman in the world. Why me?”

He didn’t answer her. He just sat there, looking into the fireplace. Staring blankly ahead into the flames as if he were miles ahead. She downed the last of her whiskey and stood up. She put the glass on the desk and then pulled off her underwear. Regardless of what he said, she was well enough to take him, so the deal was most likely off again. She was tired and the bed was calling her. She got under the covers with an exhale, enjoying the feel of satin on her skin.

She was on the edge of drifting off when he said. “You feel like her.”

Her eyes opened at those words. She turned on her side and sat up a little. “Her?”

He continued to look into the fire. “My wife.”

She wasn’t expecting to hear him admit that to her. She thought that would be something that he’d take to the grave. She bit her lip and said softly. “No one talks about her.”

He was silent before saying. “She died in my arms. Luca Changretta’s father, had her killed.” he inhaled as he admitted. “We weren’t even married for a year. I got close with her. So f**king close.” She said nothing as she watched him finish his drink. He stood up and began to pull the curtains closed, darkening the room, so she turned on the bedside light. “Loved her the first moment I looked on her. Wanted to marry her that year, but circumstances…didn’t make it possible. So,” he exhaled. “she married someone else. A year later, she came back to England. We met up and I got her pregnant with Charlie.”

She inhaled as she asked. “And her husband?”

“He died that same year.” he seemed to guess where her mind was going, for he added. “I didn’t kill him.”

“I didn’t say you did.”

“You were thinking it.” he exhaled. “Once it was…respectable enough, I married her. Lost her less than 6 months later.”

“I’m sorry.” she croaked as he got into the bed. “That must have been hard for you, especially with Charlie.”

He nodded as he wrapped his arm around her and tugged her into his side. “I’ve managed.”

“You’re not managing well.” She pointed out to him.

He exhaled as he said. “I’m managing well enough. My family and Charlie are provided for. They’re safe, protected and they will not want for anything for years to come.”

She shook her head as she said. “They want you.”

He rolled his eyes. “They need my money.”

“Charlie wants to spend more time with you.” she said. “He’d prefer ten minutes with you than a hundred toys from you.”

He was silent as he exhaled deeply. “We’ll see.”

After a moment, she asked softly. “You think…that they don’t look down and see us.”

“No, I don’t.”

“If they could…what do you think that she’d think when she looks down and sees what you’re doing to me?”

She was expecting an explosion from him, but she had to ask. Instead, he just exhaled deeply as he said. “She wouldn’t be surprised.”

Her eyes widened a little bit at those words. “Really?”

“No.” he shook his head as he ran his hand down her arm. “Because she knew what kind of man I was when I married her. Nothing I do, would really surprise her.”

“Oh.”

“She tried to make me a better man.” He said quietly. “The problem is…you can’t bring a dead man back to life.”

She understood that. She shouldn’t, but she did. She understood that feeling too well. There was nothing more to say. She just lay there in his arms and let him touch and hold her. It was a miserable day for them both, especially her. Her eyes were still swollen with unshed tears and she wanted some form of comfort. When she felt his lips on her shoulder, she closed her eyes and let her imagination wander for a moment. He was being gentle. When he was like this, he could be John. His lips traveled from her shoulder, to her neck…to that little spot behind her ear.

“John.”

She didn’t mean to say his name. It just popped out. She opened her eyes, expecting to see something, but Thomas didn’t even stop. He kept kissing her…right there. Even after she’d spoken John’s name, he hadn’t stopped kissing her there. Why? What man would continue to kiss a woman in a spot that triggered a reaction that made it clear she was thinking of another man? Thomas kept kissing her, coaxing soft gasps from her as her body began to warm under his touch. He’d never done this before. He’d never slowed down to learn where she liked to be touched, which spots actually gave her pleasure and satisfied her. Yes, he could handle himself and any woman in bed very well, she just wasn’t satisfied at the end. She felt empty and used afterwards. This…was feeling different though.

He got on top of her and spread her legs, causing her to moan as he found her clit with his finger. He didn’t plunge in this time. He prepared her, or rather toyed with her. Looking for the spot that would set her off and when he did, she jolted. They locked eyes with each other. She inhaled as she asked him directly. “What are you doing?” he never did things to be nice.

However, when she looked into his blue eyes, she saw that he was as torn up as she was. He was holding things in and back. He was a man. Men never cried or let anything out, especially men like him. Men like him lashed out or found other ways to release whatever they were feeling inside. He held her gaze as he said in a hoarse voice. “Everything that happens tonight…. it doesn’t count.” she didn’t understand for a moment until he clarified. “ I’m not paying for it. You’re not ticking off a number. Right now,” his voice got soft as he said. “we need each other. Just a man and a woman. No strings. No money attached.” Tears filled her eyes as he said. “That’s all it is. If you tell me to stop,” she stared at him through swimming eyes. “I will.”

She didn’t want him to.

She just reached up and kissed him. He was right. Today, was a terrible day for them both. Watching Luca and Autumn, kissing each other and barely keeping their hands off each other…it hurt so much. She hadn’t wanted to go to that wedding. Now, here she was seeking comfort with the man who was holding her body captive. But right now, she was in so much emotional pain that she didn’t care. She wanted him. She wanted him to take this ache away from her.

She whispered in his ear as she begged. “Make me feel good.”

“I will.”

“Please.”

“I will sweetheart.” He breathed against her lips as he slipped inside her. She moaned as he filled her. “I’ve got you.”

“Hold me.” She begged as tears dribbled down her cheeks. “Tighter.”

He reached over and turned out the light before he held onto her so tightly that it was if he was scared that she’d slip away from him. She didn’t remember how many times they made love that night. She was exhausted and it was intense. The lights were off and they couldn’t see each other in the moonlight. He was making love to Grace. She was making love to John. Both names got whispered in the night and were both silently forgiven. They were making love to ghosts and they both knew it. Neither of them cared because this was something that they both had desperately needed.

---

Chapter 21: A new deal

Thomas Shelby wasn’t the kind of man to admit that he’d made a mistake, that he’d gone too far. But when he’d woken up with his cock buried in Kate and her arms still gripping him tightly, he’d been forced to admit that. She wasn’t loving and generous. She was broken, just like him. Resilient as well. She just kept going like he did. She cared about people still. He stopped caring a long time ago. What she’d given him from the moment they’d met hadn’t been from the goodness of her heart. It had been because she’d been searching for warmth. He’d been searching for warmth and somehow within 4 days of their arrangement, he’d managed to make things all dark and twisted. He’d hurt her and not in a good way.

While he’d never admit it to her…a small part of him did regret his treatment of her on occasion. However, there was an agreement between the two of them. She was, for all intents and purposes, his whore. She wanted to be treated differently. She wasn’t like Lizzie. Lizzie was quiet and she knew her lot in life. She kept her head down, her legs spread and didn’t argue. Kate…she hadn’t or rather wouldn’t go that way. When she’d first met him, she’d mentioned that her employer had said she wouldn’t make a good whore. That she’d fight. He now saw that when he looked at her. So, that meant that he had to do thing differently with her.

Even though she was exhausted and it was early, he shook her awake. She moaned and her nails dug into his back even more. She’d been good last night. Not that she hadn’t been good before, but…this was probably the best that she’d ever been for him. Her lips had been anxious, her body desperate, her touch seeking and he’d lost all sense and sanity in her.

She opened her eyes and looked up at him. She rubbed her eyes and croaked. “I need water first---

“We’re going to talk.” he stated. “Then, once we’re done. We’re going to go to Birmingham”. Her eyes widened in shock at those words. “We’ll leave a note for Frances to take Rosemary and Charlie back home.”

She stared at him a moment and then rubbed her eyes. “I need a moment.”

“Right.” he exhaled and then withdrew from her still wet heat. She hissed and he glanced at her. “You ok?”

She nodded. “Yes.” she sat up and looked around for her nightdress which he’d thrown somewhere last night. She gave up and looked at him, her breasts spilling over the white covers. “Alright. What do you want?”

That was just like her. Always direct and to the point. He cleared his throat as he rolled onto his side and took out a cigarette. “First things first---

“Must you?” She made a face as he lit the cigarette. “I hate that smell.”

The sass in her voice almost made him smile. He hadn’t heard it since Christmas day, thanks to him. “My house. My bed.” he reminded her. She nodded and sighed. After a puff he said. “First, let’s discuss you getting a raise.”

Those damn green eyes of her widened. “W-what?”

He nodded as he said. “I’m going to raise your salary from 40 pounds to 50 pounds a f**k. that would put you…back around the 150, I think. Right?”

“170.” she said looking at him in shock before stammering. “And, no raise.”

Now he was shocked. “What?”

“i am not a charity case.” she said tightly. “I knew what I was doing when I did this to myself. I got into your bed of my volition. You don’t need to go back to the original agreement because you feel pity for me.”

He snorted and shook his head as he said dryly. “Sweetheart, there’s nothing in me to give you an ounce of pity.”

“i don’t believe you.” she said as she stared him down. “However, if you still wish to be charitable, I’ll allow you to raise it to 45. 5 more than I want and 5 less than you want. Instead of 170, you get to have me 188 times. 188 times 45 is 8,460. So, you owe me 40 of the 80 pounds I paid you.”

He studied her a moment and nodded. “You can down a whole glass of whiskey, cry your f**king head off, get f**ked out of your mind and still get your math right.”

“Yes.” she said dryly. “I’m very talented like that.”

He smirked that time as he studied her. He nodded and stuck out his hand. “Alright. 45 pounds from here on out.”

She shook his hand. “Thank you.” he went to withdraw his hand, but she held on. She inhaled as she said. “I reserve the right, to throw one or two on the house.” he exhaled. “Sometimes…like last night…I don’t want to cheapen it by putting money on it.”

He understood. “Alright.”

“You’re not John.” she said quietly. “And you could never be John. I could never be Grace. But on the nights when we use each other to be with them…I don’t want a penny from you. Ok?”

“Agreed.” she released his hand that time. He cleared his throat. “Due to my rather…unorthodox time with you on the days following Christmas---

“You mean the days where you punished me?” She demanded. He exhaled and rubbed his head. “Don’t f**king dance around the truth.” she snapped sharply at him. “You know that you did that to teach me a lesson and break me in to be a compliant, little whore!”

“Lower your f**king voice,” he snapped. “before you wake the f**king house!”

“Fine!” She hissed at him. “But don’t you dare act like I wanted to do that with you! You know I didn’t! You were a monster!”

He was silent a long time before nodding at her. “You’re right.” that’s all she’d get from him. That was as far as he was willing to bend for her. He cleared his throat. “As I was saying, I have business down in Birmingham. You’ll accompany me. There’s a good doctor down there. They’ll examine you, run a few tests and make sure that you’re alright.”

He’d have a man accompany her and send a note along with him. He’d have the doctor test and see if she was pregnant or not. He didn’t know if he did or didn’t want her pregnant now. He had originally, there’d been some twisted and selfish desire in him to keep her under him. It was still there, but now that he knew that she’d lost a baby, he wasn’t going to saddle her with one without her consent. At the 35 pounds a f**k, there had been the perfect opportunity for a slip up. Raising it to 50, made it so there were less opportunities for her to get pregnant. She chose 45 and he wasn’t going to argue with her because even upon waking she was ready for an argument.

“Thank you.”

He nodded. “Also, when you’re in Birmingham, there’s a shop. After your exam I’ll see to it that you’re taken there and you can pick out whatever you want to wear. On the house.”

She exhaled. “Mr. Shelby---

“Don’t even try to pay for anything.” he states. “I’ll have a man with you and if you leave one f**king penny, the house’ll burn down.”

She shook her head. “Understood. Is there anything particular that you want to see me in?”

He frowned and looked at her. “What’s that mean?”

“You’re sending me to buy clothes. I’m assuming that means you don’t like what I wear.”

He exhaled as he stated. “Nothing that you wear is particularly flattering.” she glowered at him. “You look like a postcard from just before the war. Get yourself and your sister some new hats, shoes, dresses and whatever goes under the dresses.” he lifted his cigarette to his lips. “Consider it a Christmas present from me.”

She was silent a moment before biting out. “I already thought I got that from you. Remember?” he went still. “A stark reminder that no man is ever going to marry me. So thank you,” she said sarcastically. “for playing the role of my husband and reminding me of what I’d never have!”

He had…no answer for that. He knew he had to try and make up for that. He’d seen her soaking the wedding dress for two days, so he knew that she was trying to clean something off it. He cleared his throat and changed the subject. “You’ll get a month off, depending on what the doctor says. Charlie does need a nanny, I’ll let you have that job since he seems to like you. You’ll get full-pay, alright?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“If you chose to keep being his nanny once our original agreement is done, that’s on you. Rosemary will keep the same room and you, I’ll put you in another room.”

She nodded before asking dryly. “That you’d come and visit when the urge hit you?”

F**k, she was a sharp tongued woman. “If I did, you’d come to my room and you’d get a bonus of 45 pounds like before. Standard fee.”

“And if I chose not?”

He shook his head and rolled his eyes. “There are other women in the world Kate. You’re not the only one that I can f**k.”

She bit her lip and exhaled. “I think…once I’ve paid you back…I’d like to stop it.” she dropped her gaze as she said. “Last night was alright, but…I always felt that sex should between two people who actually care about each other. This,” she shook her head as she ran her hand through her hair. “kissing you, touching you, begging you to f**k me while not feeling a damn thing towards you…there’s just no point. It’s all so toxic and wrong.” she looked him the eye as she said. “You don’t mind. You already live a dark, twisted and exceedingly complicated life. I don’t lead that kind of life. I can’t. I like clarity. I like the sun, especially when it’s shining through a cloud. I hate darkness. Everything here….is dark and I will die if I have to stay here with you past the time I’m obligated to spend with you.”

She made sense. She made too much sense. She was in the mud, but she wasn’t giving up. She was holding onto a tree and pulling herself out. He was slogging through the mud towards sure ground. She was going her way and he was going his. They were two very different people.

He nodded. “Understood. Any questions?”

“Yes. How often?” she asked. “I think…there should be a limit as to how many times that we…sleep together.”

He nodded as he mused. “Considering that you tend to be,” she glowered at him. “rather…delicate---

“I’m not delicate.” she snapped. “Being with you is like getting f**ked by a wild stallion and you expect me to be able to keep up with you! Never mind that I’m not used to this.”

“Wild stallion.” that amused him for a moment. He nodded as he said. “Alright, no more than twice a day at first, is that alright?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

She inhaled and crossed her arms over her tits, which he noticed were slightly pink from where he’d bitten, sucked and gnawed at them last night. Her body was covered in light bruises. No bleeding. He himself was covered in scratches from her clawing at him in the night.

“I suppose, you have terms for how you want to be f**ked.”

She nodded. “Yes, I want to discuss that.”

He wasn’t surprised. “Talk then.”

“No more from behind. No being bent over your desk.”

He shot her a look. “I like you on my desk.”

“Then you make sure I’m facing you then.” she said. “Not with my nose down in your papers!”

He nods as he lifted his cigarette to her lips. “Noted. What else?”

She exhaled as she said. “I don’t mind the bookcase.” ok, THAT surprised him. “The bath…could be nice, just not the way you were last time.”

He nods. “You want to be facing me, right?”

She nods. “Yes.”

That was a minor thing. “Alright.”

Suddenly, she just blurted out. “I am NEVER taking your cock in my mouth again!”

Now, THAT was a f**king crime. “Kate---

“I HATE it!!” She snapped. “I feel like I’m choking----

“You need to relax your---

“I don’t care---

“How about, we try again---

“No.”

“I’ll go slower---

“I said no.”

“and I’ll help you with it.”

“I said no!” She repeated! “God! What is it about me having my mouth around your cock that gets you all excited?”

“It’s just,” words faded. How could explain it to her. She had no idea about this sensation. The rush, the way the world spun, the way his soul rattled when he came in her mouth. The way the sounds she made sounded exquisite, the cries from her throat vibrated against his cock and the pleasure that exploded in his mind. Then…he remembered something. “you need to go to the doctor.”

She frowned. “Why?”

“And then…when you get back,” he put out his cigarette and got out of the bed. “tonight, I’m going to show you why I like that.”

“Mr. Shelby---

“Get dressed.” he stated.

Once she got cleared by her doctor, tonight, he was tying her to his bed, spreading her legs wide open and teasing her poor little sore entrance until she had her first orgasm on his tongue. Kate had no idea what she was in for tonight, but he knew that she was going to enjoy it. All women did, but he had a feeling that she'd be especially fond of his tongue buried inside her.

Chapter 22: Guns and demands

Thomas said nothing to her as he buried his nose in his newspaper during the ride down to Birmingham. She should feel happier that he’d woken up in a better mood today and set better terms for her. However, she was apprehensive about it. She didn’t like it. Thomas wasn’t nice by nature, so him to start showing any kindness or reasonableness was reason to be on edge.

Birmingham seemed like such a smile and dirty place, especially after spending so many days in London and in his mansion. It was almost impressive to see how he’d worked his way up from Birmingham to get up to how far he’d gotten. But he’d lost a lot and regardless how much he’d made, he had nothing of real value. He’d lost his wife, he was estranged from his family and he was going to lose his son.

The car stopped and Thomas got out. She turned and got out of her seat. The air in Birmingham had a smell about it. It smelled of dirt, iron, metal and mud. It was a pleasant smell somehow. It smelled honest and good.

“Oi!” Thomas snapped his fingers at someone. “Come here.” she turned and watched as a mixed boy hurried over. Thomas walked over to the back of the car and popped the trunk of the car. “Isaiah,” her eyes bulged as Thomas pulled the box containing her mother’s wedding dress and veil out of the back! “come here!”

She stormed towards him. “What the f**k are you---

He ignored her. “Take this to Zhang. Tell him to get it cleaned.”

She reached for the box. “That’s my mother’s---

He took it out of her reach. “I know. Isaiah is going to take it to Zhang. He’s a good cleaner,” that took the wind out of her for a moment. “he’s going to bring it back to you and it’ll be brand new.”

She stared at him, her breathing was hard and tight. Her chest was hurting right now. She was relieved and she was angry at the same time. She inhaled and exhaled as she bit out. “I can’t…afford that kind of cleaning service---

“I ruined the dress.” he said simply. “So, this one’s on me.”

That…made no sense to her. Thomas Shelby, he didn’t have a kind bone in his body. And after what he’d done to her, he humiliated her by forcing her into wearing her mothers wedding dress and veil. Her blood boiled as she remembered him spending his seed over her dress twice! She remembered his seed coating her face, hair and the veil. He’d done that deliberately to hurt her.

She held his gaze as she demanded. “Is that your way of saying you’re sorry?”

“I don’t do apologies.”

“You could try.” she bit out.

“No.” he shook his head as he said. “If you apologize once, you do it again and again and again. Like taking bricks out of the wall of your f**king house.”

She let out a sharp sound as she half spat at him. “That’s pathetic!”

He was silent a long time before saying. “That’s as close as you’re going to get from me Kate. So, are you going to let Isaiah take the dress or what?”

His voice. The arrogant, cocky way he spoke. The agitation in his eyes, the way he stood tattled how he felt inconvenienced by having to clean up her mother’s dress. She stomped towards him and drew her hand back as if she were going to slap him. As predicted, he grabbed her right hand, which is exactly what she wanted him to do as she grabbed his gun from his shoulder holster with her left. The man holding the box with her mother’s wedding dress dropped it as he fumbled for his own weapon but she was faster. Before Thomas could react, she had his gun pressed to the side of his head.

When he opened his mouth, she cocked the gun and he froze. “Drop the gun.” the boy ordered.

“Kid, stay out of this.” she said without looking away from Thomas and his cold expression. He wasn’t even intimidated, not fully. She inhaled before threatening. “If he ruins my mother’s dress…I’m going to put a bullet in your f**king head. Do you understand me?”

He didn’t even blink. “You could, then Isaiah will put one in your head.”

She smirks as she whispers. “Who says I’ll do it here. If I want to kill you, Thomas Shelby…I’m in the best position to kill you and you know that.” he looked blankly at her and she looked back at him. “So, do you understand me?”

He nodded. “Yeah.” there was a long moment of silence and then he said. “You wanna let go of my head and give me back my f**king gun?”

“No!” She half-roared in his face. The man didn’t even blink. She exhaled and pulled the gun away from his head. “But I might as well.”

“Yeah.” she gave his head a yank before handing his gun back to him. He exhaled as he said. “Isaiah, tell Zhang that there’s a mad woman here,:”

“You bastard---

“Who is most likely to kill him if he ruins the dress. The question is,” he exhales as he tucks his gun back into his holster. “if she’s going to shoot me first or him first. Either way, both of us are getting killed if he f**ks up. So, tell him not to f**k up.”

Isaiah nods as he puts his gun away. “Right away Mr. Shelby!”

The lad picks up the box and hurries down the street. Thomas exhales as he picks up his hat. He slaps it on his side a few times, knocking the mud off. She watches him with a glower until he looks up at her. “What Kate?”

She crossed her arms and asked him. “Are you sorry?”

He exhaled. “Kate, I already said---

“Nod your head. Yes or no.” She said firmly. “I’m not asking for words or even an apology. A nod is good enough for me and I am demanding it of you!”

He shook his head as he turned and walked away from her. “You don’t make f**king demands of me.”

“Well someone f**king should!” She snapped as she stomped after him. “I never took you for a bloody coward Thomas Shelby!” her voice echoed in the quiet street and he stopped dead in his tracks. “You really are a f**king gutless wonder!”

He spun around, grabbing her by the throat and he pushed her into the wall of a building. She glowered at him as he exhaled sharply. “One day, Kate. One f**king day.”

“You’re going to kill me.”

“No.” he shook his head as he said. “Be a f**king waste.”

“Let me guess, you’re going to tie me up and f**k me raw again.” she said dryly. “What else can you do to me Tommy?”

“So many things Kate. So many f**king things.”

That weird tension happened between them again, causing her to shift slightly as she ignored his fingers around her throat. He was a dominant man. He was reasserting his dominance, which was more like a child having a tantrum. You don’t encourage a child having a tantrum. You ignore the tantrum.

She looked him dead in the eye and demanded again. “Are you sorry?” his grip on her throat loosened and he dropped his hand from her throat. She knew him. She shouldn’t know him and his moods so well in less than a week, but she did. She grabbed him by his vest and swung him into the wall!

He looked stunned for a moment. “What the---

“Are you f**king sorry?” She shouted at him. She was long past caring that this was in public. “You f**king man up Thomas Shelby and nod your head!” For a moment, they stood there staring at each other. They were breathing heavy and the air in Birmingham seemed to get thicker and darker. Then…he nodded! Kate exhaled before asking him. “Are you…ever going to do anything like that to me again?”

he held her gaze as he stated. “Not unless you want me to.”

“That was my mother’s wedding dress!!” She shouted in his face! “Why the f**k would I want you to do that!?” She let go off his coat and stepped away from him, wiping her hands on her dress. “God! For such a supposedly clever man, you…have got to be the biggest, f**king idiot on this entire planet!”

“For a lady who was raised by a rich Oxford professor,” he said right behind her. “you’ve got a dirty mouth.”

“i wonder who’s fault that is!” She snapped as she spun around and found herself face to face with him. Actually, nose to nose was much more accurate. “I never talked that way until I met you!”

“Don’t blame me.” he rasped lowly, his lips dangerously close to hers. “You’re a f**king bomb, always waiting to f**king go off on me or someone else.”

“You need to be f**king told off. Everyone else is too scared to tell you off,” she bit out. “you bastard.”

He grabbed her chin, almost as if he were going to kiss her, but then someone called out. “Mr. Shelby!”

“F**k.” he snarled before turning towards the voice. She turned to see a reasonably attractive man hurrying towards her and Thomas. Thomas exhaled as he said. “Your guard for the day.”

She blinked. “What?”

“You are a f**king nuisance Kate. You can find trouble like no other f**king woman on this planet. He is going to keep you safe.”

“i don’t need a bodyguard!”

He looked her top to bottom and stated blatantly. “Around these parts, yeah, you f**king do.” her jaw dropped in shock at his words. “Declan, this is Kate.”

“Katherine Carter.” she corrected. She didn’t know who this was and he no right to use her given name, especially since he was looking at her in an odd way.

“She goes by Kate.” she rolled her eyes. “Kate, this is one of my men, Declan Walsh. She’s got an appointment at the Lee’s, they’re expecting you. Once she’s done there, she’s got an actual doctor appointment with Doctor Jordan. Make sure there’s a nurse in there.” Declan nodded. “After that, make sure that she get’s over to Adele’s dress shop. Once she’s done, help her get everything to my car and bring her to me.”

Declan nodded. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.”

“If I’m not done, take her to the Garrison and keep her there until I arrive. Alright?”

Declan nodded. “Yes, Mr. Shelby!” Thomas turned and walked briskly away without a word. “So,” Declan said with a thick Irish accent. “you must be a friend of Mr. Shelby’s for him to go out and make this much of a fuss over you.”

She didn’t need tales being told. She shook her head. “I’m his nanny.”

“Oh.” Declan nodded. “That makes a mite more sense. He loves that kid of his.” she nodded and walked along with him. “So, Katherine carter, he said. Right?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t recall seeing you from around these parts. Where you from?”

“Oxford.”

“That explains it. You’re a bit of a lady round here! No wonder Shelby wants me to keep an eye on you. Don’t worry, I’ll keep both eyes on you.”

She smiled faintly. It didn’t really matter. She was Thomas's to use. He was just getting her ready for February. Him getting her mother’s wedding dress and veil cleaned wasn’t enough to undo the damage that he’d done to her soul. She was forever damaged and she hated that he was right. No one would ever love her, so she'd take what little she could get from Thomas.

---

Chapter 23: Out of control

She did not like Declan. Was he a nice guy? Yes. Was he handsome? She didn’t know, she wasn’t really looking at him like that! Possibly, yes, but she was trying to shop right now! Could he keep a conversation going? Yes, but he controlled most of the conversation which was probably fine because she didn’t want to talk. But he talked! Now, John talked but he engaged her in conversation as well! Perhaps she was nitpicking. She didn’t know! How did she know? It had been a very weird day for her and she was just muddled.

First, they’d gone to the Lee’s. she wasn’t’ expecting to wind up in the middle of a gypsy camp. Everyone had stared at her and Declan. This woman, Zilpha Lee had brought into her wagon where she’d read her palm after making her drink some sort of sweat tea. She’d then had Kate strip, which she hadn’t been expecting to do. But the woman had such a strict look about her that she did it anyway. Strange how being Thomas's whore in one week made her not care about who saw her naked. The woman examined her, she cupped her breasts and pinched her nipples. She pulled at her hips and then ordered her to lay back on this bed. Kate did so and looked upwards at the ceiling as this woman parted her legs. She closed her eyes, tears of embarrassment and humiliation burning her as the woman used two fingers to open her up. The woman muttered angrily in a language before walking over to get a jar of something. That’s when something wonderfully cool, coated her inner walls and Kate let out an exhale of relief.

The woman laughed. “I bet that feels good.”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“He’s been f**king you hard. Not much rest in-between.”

She inhaled. “He did give me some time off, but, there was a wedding---

“And men’s cocks get hard at weddings. What else is new? I’m going to send this along with you. Use it afterwards and tell him to wait four hours in-between each round.”

She shook her head as she said. “This is Thomas Shelby we’re talking about.”

“I know.” Zilpha said. “That’s why I got you a knife. Point it at his balls once and he’ll back off.”

She smiled. “Ok. Thank you.”

“Right. You’re not pregnant, which is good.” That made her heart sink. “The two of you being careful?” How did she know? She just nodded. “Good. You’re alright. He was worried that you’d been hurt, especially since you had and lost a baby, but, you’re alright as near as I can tell. Go ahead and get dressed now.”

She did so while answering Zilpha’s questions. She lied about being careful. In truth, when she’d miscarried, the doctor had said it was unlikely that she’d be able to get pregnant again. That put a damper on the other doctor exam. The doctor hadn’t wanted to send a nurse in, but Declan yelled at him and forced a nurse to go in. She didn’t really care at this point. She didn’t see why she needed to see two doctors. She knew that all the reports were going to Thomas. She was curious as to why he’d send her to a gypsy camp instead of a second doctor, but he was strange.

Then, Declan had taken her into the ladies dress shop, where he was having too much fun. Ok, he was charming, she had to give him that. But he was too flirty, she didn’t like that. She liked it when men were straight, outright and honest. Better that they be bold than all this dancing around with flowery words.

“You should get this.” he said as he held up a hat that was covered in pink carnations and lace.

She shook her head as she said. “It’d clash with my hair.”

“i don’t see how. Red and white make pink.”

“Redheads don’t wear pink.” she said simply as she moved to look at a dress. It was a nice one. White with some black decor on it.

“Balderdash!” He proclaimed. “A lass as fetching as you would look lovely in this.”

She exhaled as she said. “I’m too old and too tired for such colors, Mr. Declan.”

“Just Declan, please.” he exhaled as he said. “You don’t smile very much, do you?”

She bit her lip and said. “I have no reason to smile. I’m shopping.”

“Shall I take those to the front desk for you?” he inquired.

“Yes, thank you.” she handed him the items. “And,” she grabbed the black and white dress. It would fit her. “this one too, please. And if you don’t mind, can you ask them to wrap them?”

“No, I don’t mind.”

“Thank you.” she inhaled as she said. “I’d like a little privacy.”

He nodded. “Of course.”

He hurried to the front, his arm laden with a few dresses, hats and shoes. Most of the stuff was for Rosemary. Her dresses suited. If anything, it was her lingerie that she needed more of. Thomas, he was prone to just rip stuff off her to get to her. He was paying for this, so she could go ahead and order some stuff that was more expensive. The lingerie section was in a separate part of the store. .she picked out pieces that were made of nude fabric. Black or white lace. He liked things either innocent or full on slutty. Not a mix between the two. She looked for things that were either easily accessible or easy for him to rip off. She found half a dress from the Edwardian era that would leave her bust covered, but the rest of her body exposed. She shook her head. He’d love that. She’d save that piece for a day that he was in a real bad mood and she needed to blow his mind and calm him down.

After those were bagged up, she went out to the main to find Declan was coming back in the store…and Thomas was at the desk paying. He arched a brow as he looked at her. “More?”

“You said for me and Rosemary.”

“That I did.” he looked at the basket holding the multiple bundles of lingerie and said. “Looks promising.”

She exhaled and said in a lower voice. “You’ll be pleased.”

He nods. “Good to know. How much?”

“80 pounds, Mr. Shelby.”

She frowned. “That seems a bit low.”

“Mr. Shelby is a special customer.” the lady said. “He gets a discount.”

She snorts. “Let me guess, 50% off.”

“More like 30%.” She said. “You bought a lot that was on sale.”

“I’ll get that.” Declan took the basket from her. “There’s a spot for this in the car.”

“Thank you.”

As Declan hurried off, Thomas asked. “He bother you?”

She shook her head. “No. He just talks a lot.”

He snorts. “I find that hard to believe, considering how much you f**king talk. I thought you two would hit it off.”

She exhaled as she said. “He was well behaved, nothing improper happened. He’s like a very, enthusiastic, golden-retriever.”

He shook his head as he tucked his wallet into his pocket. “Let’s go.”

They walked towards the door and the door opened. “Here you go.” Declan said with a smile on his face.

This time, Kate couldn’t help but smile back. “Thank you Mr. Declan.”

“Declan, please.” he let go of the door and fell in step beside her. “Where are you going?”

“Well,” she exhaled as she said. “I have to get back to Mr. Shelby’s and take care of Charlie. So, that’s that.” Thomas had brought his car right out front, so she didn’t have far to go. She turned towards him and said. “Thank you very much. I hope it wasn’t too much of an inconvenience having to follow me around town all day.”

“It’s his f**king job.” Thomas said as he opened his car door.

“It was still fun.” Declan said. “Honest, I quite enjoyed it.” he gestured for her to walk around to the other side of the car. He opened the door and she held out her hand for him to shake. When they shook hands, he covered her hand with his other hand. “Tell me, when’s your next day off?”

She blinked. “My next day off? I don’t think I have a day off.”

“Mr. Shelby?” Declan looked inside the car and asked. “Does Miss Carter get a day off?”

He frowned and looked at her. “Why?”

“Oh! I was wanting to take her out to the movies.” Kate’s jaw dropped and she took a step back. “But she doesn’t know what day she has off.”

“No!” She pulled her hand free, her face warming as she stammered out quickly. “That wouldn’t be appropriate. I’m Mr. Shelby’s nanny. So, it wouldn’t be right that you, well, engage me in such a manner.”

“If Mr. Shelby doesn’t mind---

“I also have a younger sister.” she tacked on quickly. “I’m also emotionally unavailable.”

“You said that you were single!” Declan asked. she got in the car. “If I misunderstood---

“Her fiancé,” Thomas answered for her as she practically scrambled into the car. “was killed in the war.”

Declan’s face went still. “Oh. I’m sorry.”

“That’s alright.” she inhaled sharply as she said. “Can we go? Please?” Before Thomas could answer, she slammed the door shut and said. “Now, driver!”

The driver actually listened to her and he shook his head. “I actually give the f**king orders, not the nanny.”

“Sorry, Mr. Shelby.”

He shook his head as he picked up a stack of papers. She shook her head as she rubbed her eyes. After a moment, she said. “I’m sorry about that.”

“Why the f**k,” he bit out. “did he think that he could ask you out?”

“i don’t know!” She stated. “I didn’t---

“You f**king must have!”

She turned towards him. “I didn’t do anything---

“You,” he snapped at her. “are a f**king,” she went to slap him before he could call her a whore again. But he was ready, this time he grabbed both her hands. “liar and a f**king tease.” he snarled in her face. “And you need to be taught a f**king lesson!”

“You bastard!” She spat at him.

“Back to the betting house.” he ordered the driver without looking away from her. “What I’m going to do to you…you don’t want your sister hearing you f**king scream.”

Her eyes widened. “You said---

“And then you pointed my f**king gun at my head. Maybe by then, your dress will be done, who knows. But mark my words Kate,” he grabbed her by the throat again and she let out a cry. “you will scream. You’re gonna f**king cry and I’m going to enjoy every f**king minute of it!”

Why? Why could she never control herself when it came to this f**king bastard? Any time that she provoked him, he retaliated towards her and she always, always wound up paying for it! Why couldn’t she just shut up and take the sting of his words? He broke his word frequently, but he always upheld his promises. She just hoped that Zilpha Lee’s salve would make it possible for her to walk tomorrow. She should have asked for something to help her throat. From the look in his eyes, her throat was going to be so raw that it'd be bleeding tonight.

---

Chapter 24: Tears

F**k! he couldn’t wait to get his f**king hands on her! She…was a f**king nuisance! He had two f**king sisters and not one of them in all their years of living had caused as much trouble as Kate had in one f**king week! By God he was going to make her suffer! As for Declan, who the f**k did he think he was asking Kate out in front of him!? she was his f**king property! He owned every inch of her! He owned every hair on her head and he owned that f**king c*nt of hers. The more he thought about Declan looking at her, touching her….god, he was going out of his f**king mind! Kate, she could insist that she was innocent, but he knew better! She wasn’t! she was a f**king tease who then played innocent when a man when after her. She needed a stark reminder that she was his and his alone. He wasn’t waiting for the two hour drive to get her back to his house to teach her a lesson.

The car stopped out front and he got out of the car. He tried the door and it was locked. Good. That meant Finn was out and he had the house to himself and Kate. He reached into his pocket for the key and unlocked the door.

Kate got out, her eyes darting around nervously. “Upstairs,” he ordered firmly. “go to the left and it’s the last door. If you bought something for me to see you in,” he exhaled hotly, trying not to imagine her covered in something green and revealing. “you better put it f**king on. You’ve got five minutes.”

She nodded and croaked as she picked up her basket. “Ok.”

He turned to the driver and said. “Come back in two hours.”

He heart Kate whimper at those words and a beam of pleasure shot through him. God, she had no idea what she inspire in him. The things he wanted to do to her. If she weren’t so f**king delicate and he’d been granted a constant erection for 24 hours, she’d f**king pregnant with four babies by the time he was done with her! He inhaled and stepped into his childhood home which was soon to be full with the sounds of Kate screaming, sobbing and begging for mercy. She’d receive none from him.

He stepped inside and locked the house. He took a chair and put it under the lock, just in case Finn decided to come on home. He hadn’t seen Finn in a while. He made a note to see if he could find out where he was, what the lad was up to. Autumn’s words about them not being a family anymore hadn’t rung true until this moment. Ada lived mostly in America with Karl. Polly lived off with Michael. Arthur and Linda had their boy. John and Esme lived out in the middle of nowhere with their brood of kids. Autumn, she’d gotten married the other day and was now honeymooning in Italy and letting Luca Changretta, of all the men in the world between her legs and put a baby in her. It was a mistake, a f**king mistake for her. But let her enjoy the love while it lasted. While they all hated it, it was a good union. Changretta made them stronger in America and here, Sabini had to pay them more for his disloyalty. It was all good. The Italians he’d chased out had been allowed to return home in the spirit of peace, so there was no risk of another uprising. Politically, the marriage was good. Time would tell if Autumn had picked the right man for her.

After making sure each door was locked and secured, he got back to business. Kate was upstairs, probably growing wet with anxiety. Good. He wanted her wet. He wanted liquid to be running down her f**king legs when he got up there. He removed his overcoat and coat before going to the closet. He seemed to recall there being some rope in there. He didn’t know how Kate would react to being tied down, but it was for his safety in this particular instance. She wouldn’t know what he was doing and he wasn’t going to tell her. Again he was being a prick to her, but he didn’t care. She couldn’t keep sassing off like that to him in public, pressing his own f**king gun to his head and not expect some kind of punishment. Besides, if he didn’t tie her f**king legs down she was going to kick him in the head, break his nose or give him a black eye. All of those were the LAST thing that he needed! Polly had been eyeing him at Kate at wedding and with the two of them ‘catching’ the garter and bouquet that Luca and Autumn had practically thrown at them. There was definitely a visit from her coming in the next few days.

Ah, he found the rope in a bucket behind some old newspaper. He tested it by pulling on it. It held. He took his knife from his pockets and cut it in half. One piece for each of one of her legs and he’d use his belt to secure her hands over her head. He shook his head at the picture of her in his mind. Tied up, unable to move, her green eyes undoubtedly ablaze with a fury while she proceeded to cuss him out. Well, if she got too noisy he could always gag her with his handkerchief. the woman was a f**king brat, but damn it all to hell if she didn’t make each time in bed an adventure.

After deciding that the house was secure, he went upstairs, removing his handcuffs as he went. He didn’t need to undress completely. Not for this. He moved slowly up the stairs, making sure that his tread was a bit heavier than normal so she’d hear him coming. He shouldn’t enjoy the way her eyes got wide with fear, but they were so green, it was amusing. He stepped into his room. The room he’d grown in as a child and saw the f**king devil for the first time. The problem was…the devil was a woman and this woman was disguised as an angel.

Kate…she was standing with her back to the door. She’d probably planned this. She was wearing a floor-length, black, lace gown of some kind and she was stark naked underneath it. Oh…she knew what she was doing. She’d planned this deliberately. She knew, she knew what would turn him on. And this…this set his blood on fire. Then she turned around and his heart stopped. The whole front of her f**king dress was missing except for some bits of lace that were lending her breasts some support. Lending support was generous. Her breasts were being pushed up and they were all in his face. She shifted uneasily and he heard a crackle. Yes. She was wet. Her thighs were sticking together. He looked at her and she took a step back.

“Please---

“On the bed Kate.” he ordered. He was already f**king hard and he had to last two hours with her. “Now.”

She didn’t move. Her eyes were on his hands. “What’s the rope---

“On the bed, Kate.”

She shook her head. “No!” Good. She was getting claws. He moved towards her and she ran for the bath. He saw her going that way and he grabbed her before she even got her hand on the knob! “No!” She shouted at him. “I said no!”

“Don’t care.” he pushed her against the wall as he undid his belt. “You…don’t get to put a gun to my head, in front of my men,” he spun her around and swiftly lashed her hands together. She went to spit in his face, but this time he ducked. “and not have me do anything to you. Then you tried to f**king hit me Kate.”

“You bastard!” She shouted at him as he tugged on his belt, half-dragging her to his bed. “You f**king bastard!”

“New rule.” He said as he pushed her onto the bed. She tried kicking him in his balls. She just barely missed him! He moved out of reach as he tied her hands above her head. He raised her up slightly so her back was just off the bed. “Every time, that you do something like that…I’m gonna pay you back, Kate. You do that…and I’m gonna do whatever the f**k I want to you in my bed. Do you understand?”

“You’re a f**king piece of sh*!” She shouted at him.

He took his handkerchief and put it in her mouth. He didn’t want to hear her cursing right now. She continued screaming her lungs out, thrashing and kicking at him. He wouldn’t be able to get in the bed. So he’d have to tie her left leg to the bed, hold her right leg open. No problem there. It’d be fun feeling her squirm and try to get that leg free. He tied her left ankle to the white bedpost and she fought him the entire time, her green eyes shooting daggers at him.

He knelt, grabbing her right ankle tightly in his hand. She let out a shout of anger when she couldn’t get free from his grip! He smirked at her as he locked eye contact with her. “You picked the perfect dress for this Kate.”

She let out what sounded like a garbled. “F**k you!”

He actually laughed as he said. “Later. When you beg me.”

She let out more angry sounds as he spread her right leg as far as it could go. Kate was very flexible. He made a note. He inhaled before diving between her thighs. Instantly, Kate stopped screaming and her whole body went still. Then, she let out a scream and her entire body went tense. Her muscles flexed under his touch. His hand around her ankle felt her foot stretch. He ran his hand down her foot to find her toes were f**king curled. he knew that she’d love this. He let her leg go so he could pleasure her with both his hands and his tongue. Kate wrapped her leg around his waist and she grabbed him tightly.

F**k, she tasted amazing! She tasted like cream and whiskey. He let out a groan as he buried himself deeper in her wet heat. Kate was breathing hard and he knew that she was sobbing because of the sounds that were coming out of her. This was undoubtedly the first time a man had ever pleasured her with his tongue. He should have savored her. Gone slowly, made her head spin. But no, he wanted her f**king break, leave her in so deep a cloud that she had no idea what her name was! And then, then he’d make her come on his tongue again! After the second time, she’d take his cock. After coming three times, she’d be too exhausted to cause him anymore trouble.

He popped up from her sweetness to see her back arched and Kate holding onto his belt for dear life. She had tears of pleasure running down her cheeks and her eyes were scrunched shut tight. He reached up and took the handkerchief from her mouth. He wanted to hear her fall apart.

She screamed. “Oh God! God!! God!!!! Thomas!!!” he dove back between her legs and caught her clit with his lips and she screamed as if she were being murdered! He liked her like this! He slipped two fingers in there, causing her to wail. “No! No! No! Oh God! No! No!”

A third finger.

Her voice broke and she arched her back, gripping his belt so tight that her knuckles were white! He spread her open, using two fingers from each hand and blew on her clit before biting it.

She came.

Kate wailed loudly and he lunged for her, catching her cries in his mouth. She let out a groan and a sharp cry as he thrust his hard erection against her wet entrance. He slipped his hand under her back and caught her as she went lax. She was sobbing, this time from pure pleasure. He gave her an open mouth kiss, slipping his tongue in her mouth as his free hand slipped between her thighs again, finding her clit. She moaned against his mouth and broke the kiss.

“No more.” she rasped.

“You’re not in f**king charge here Kate.” he stated as he continued to pleasure her. “I’m not done with you, yet.” she let out a whine of despair. “F**king hell, you’re f**king sweet.”

“Tommy,” she begged as she cried. “please. Please.”

“As you wish.” he smirked as he kissed his way back down her body to her shaking thighs.

“Oh my god!” She shrieked as he parted them.

“Round two Kate.” he couldn’t resist adding. “Let’s see how well you hold up during round three with me!”

She let out a wail of despair as he resumed tormenting her. This…was probably going to be the most enjoyable two hours he’d ever spent in Kate’s company. She wouldn’t even remember who the f**k Declan was when she left this room today.

---

Chapter 25: Knowledge is power

Thomas grabbed her around the waist and tugged her against him. Kate let out a gasp as he buried a kiss in her neck. “Oh God!”

He chuckled darkly as he rumbled in her ear. “Can you f**king walk, Kate?”

She bit her lip. “Of course I can.”

“Prove it.” She took a step forward and promptly lost her balance. He caught her around the waist and chuckled. “No, you f**king can’t.”

“For God’s sake.” she exhaled deeply.

That had been…absolutely mind blowing. Thomas, he’d come off as this complete jerk, pushing her around and ordering her about as if he were really going to punish her. When he’d come in with the two pieces of rope, the belt and that intimidating erection of his, she’d been absolutely terrified. Then she got angry at him for breaking his word again. The tug of war that led to him putting her on the bed, tying her to bed and then giving her the most exquisite pleasure. God! She’d spent ten minutes thinking that he was going to make her choke on his cock. But the moment that he’d put his tongue between her legs…she’d almost died! That was, possibly the most amazing sensation that she’d ever felt in her life. She’d never heard of such a thing and she’d never thought that such a thing could feel so amazing! She wasn’t expecting to enjoy it, not after the way it had started. But before she’d even had her first orgasm, she’d already come to the realization that she did like this. He liked it because it fed his ego. She loved it and God help her, Thomas was skilled! He did things with his tongue, fingers and even his teeth that she hadn’t thought possible!

Thomas…dear God after being a completely selfish and rough brute was completely different when he was between her legs this way. This was the first time he’d given her more pleasure than himself. After she’d come for the second time, he’d untied her and let her touch him. He let her kiss him and this time, she’d taken some initiative. She’d pushed him onto his back and she’d ridden him. He watched her, staring up at her with those bright blue eyes of his. He actually asked her if she was alright when she sank down on his cock. She was. She wasn’t too terribly sore and he let her pick her own pace. But after two completely insane orgasms, she wanted him to find his release. After he’d come in her, he’d put her back on her back and pleasured her once more. God, she’d nearly passed out in his arms after that. He let her rest for 30 minute, running a rough hand up and down her side. His hand felt like the hand of a working man, she’d never noticed that before. The callouses were probably old from when he’d grown up in this neighborhood. It felt as if she were learning about another side of him and her damp skin was absorbing it through his touch. He was the one who told her that they needed to get going. He reminded her that she needed to put that salve on from Zilpha Lee before going home, which informed her that he’d indeed been given a report on her health.

They’d gotten their clothes in order and Kate, was absolutely drunk out of her mind. “Well,” Thomas murmured in her ear. “did you learn your f**king lesson?”

“Yes.”

“And…what is that?”

“To,” she exhaled deeply as she tried to think of a damn thing to say. “keep my hands to myself.”

“And?”

She licked her lips. “Not to…touch your gun or threaten you…like that again.”

“Good girl.” She bit her lip. How the hell did he manage to make her tremble with those two little words!? “Do that again and you’ll find yourself on my bed again, Kate.”

“With the ropes?” she asked as she glanced sideways towards him.

he chuckled as he said. “Should have known you’d like being tied up.”

She blushed as she breathed. “Just the hands.”

“Noted. But…there was always a chance you were going to kick me in the head.” she laughed and nodded. He was right there. “You little minx.”

Thomas bit her earlobe, causing her to groan. “God, you’re an animal, Thomas Shelby.”

“Nothing new.” he stated.

She shook her head in amusement. “No, it’s not.” after a few more nibbles she asked quietly. “Show me around the house?”

He was silent a moment. “Yeah, why not?”

She adjusted her hair and he took her hand, holding onto it firmly lest she lose her balance. Her head was still spinning a little bit so she was glad to have his hand to hold onto. she cleared her throat and asked. “You grew up here?”

He nodded. “Yeah. Just the rooms up here. Mine you’ve been in. Arthur’s there. John there. Ada there. Autumn and Finn, they stayed around the block with Polly after she lost her kids.”

She gripped the banister as she said. “It’s a nice house.”

He rolled his eyes. “It’s f**king sh*t Kate.”

“It’s not sh*t Thomas.” she said. “It’s your childhood home, it’s where you grew up. If you truly hated it, you’d have blown it up a long time ago.”

He paused halfway down the stairs. “Actually, I didn’t think about that until you mentioned it.”

“Stop it.” she smacked his arm. “This is a charming, little house.”

“How the f**k can you say that?” he demanded.

“Come on. The wallpaper is a little faded, but the house has good bones.” they resumed walking down the stairs. She inhaled as she said. “The only thing I don’t like…is the green paint.”

He blinked. “Poll loves that paint.”

“I’m sorry, but,” she exhaled as she ran her hand over a painted door frame. It was chipped in a few places, revealing some beautiful oak wood underneath. “I love wood, so…it physically hurts me to see it painted.”

He nodded. “Next time you misbehave, I’ll tie you up and have you watch as a someone paints a wood antique.”

“God no!” She pleaded. “I’d rather take your cock in my mouth a hundred times.”

“Kate, it’s just paint.” he stated. “It can’t be that bad---

“Yes, it can!” She proclaimed he opened the door to reveal the parlor. “I hated what Mr. Changretta did, painted that entire house white.”

He chuckled. “THat must have been f**king torture for you.”

“You’ve NO idea.” she moved towards the mantelpiece. She could feel him watching her as she ran her hand over the oak. It was dusty and dirty, but at least it was real wood. “I’m so glad you didn’t paint the wood in your house. That would have looked bad.”

He exhaled as he said. “Over here.” she nodded and followed him towards a curtain. He tried two doors and shook his head. “These should have been f**king locked.”

“Why?”

He shot her a look. “Ever been in a betting house?” she shook her head. “No. A good girl like you, from oxford. Probably never done a bad thing in your life.”

Heat scalded her cheeks at that observation. “No, I hadn’t. then I met you and apparently,” she looked him dead in the eye as she said. “all I do are bad things.”

He shook his head. “You…are f**king mad Kate.”

She bit her lip and then asked him quietly. “Which one of us isn’t?”

He was silent a long time and then he looked at her. For a moment, he was reading her and then he nodded. “Come on.”

He opened the door and she followed him into the betting house. While he didn’t think much of it, every little thing that he showed her about himself, even the house he’d grown up in, helped her understand him a little more.

---

Two weeks later,

---

Thomas jumped as Kate banged on the window behind him. He wanted to be angry, but she had this large streak of mud under her nose. She waved at him as she shouted. “Come outside!”

He shook his head. “No!”

“Come on!” She pressed her nose against the glass, nearly making him laugh. “Charlie’s riding his pony.”

Oh, that was tempting. He shook his head as he said. “I’m expecting a phone call.” Kate hit the glass again before turning around and getting out of the bushes around the window.

She was the perfect nanny for Charlie. The other nannies had been older and unable to match his energy. Kate, she had an abundance of energy and with Rosemary’s help, they were able to keep Charlie busy and entertained. Frances reported that Charlie occasionally fell asleep at the dinner table, having played so hard during the day. That was good. He was busy and he didn’t get to spend as much time with Charlie as he wanted. One day, he’d be able to slow down and take it easy. But today wasn’t that day.

Wham!

The door to the library flew open and in came that mad woman, otherwise known as Kate. He knew it was her without looking up. No one walked into his library like that, not even Polly. She’d grown confident under their new agreement that her body be given a month to heal. They still did other things to each other, when they fancied it. She occasionally came onto him which was always a pleasant surprise. Mostly, she’d make out with him and use her hand until he came. But, occasionally, when the mood struck her she’d use her tongue on him. She was still tentative about using her whole mouth, but he let her do as she wished. He was starting to look at her a little differently. Maybe it’s because with the weeks she’d been given off, she was starting to settle into the house. She wasn’t as hesitant as she was before. She was comfortable and her being comfortable, made her confident. He liked her like this

“Kate,” he said. “I’m busy----

“No!” She said sharply. “You are NOT missing this.” She grabbed the arm of his chair and gave it a yank. He exhaled as he glowered up at her. “I called Frances. She is going to stand here and watch the phone. If and when it rings, she will come out and tell you after answering it.” she glowered at him, those green eyes of hers sparking. “But Charlie is riding his pony for the first time and you will not f**king miss it! Do you hear me?”

For such a tiny woman…she had no problem getting all up in his face and making demands. After a moment of staring each other down, he said. “Let me get my coat.”

She smiled. “Thank you!”

He rolled his eyes. “If I don’t go, you’re going to bang on the f**king glass until it breaks.”

“Yes, I will. Besides,” she smirks. “you want to go. Someone just needs to give you a push once in a while!” He shook his head as he stood up and pulled on his coat on. Frances came into the library with a faint smile on her face. “Thank you Frances.”

“No problem.” she then addressed him. “Oh, Mr. Shelby.”

“Yes?”

“I'm happy to watch the phone for you, any time you want a moment with your boy.” she smiled at him. “I know how you treasure time with him.”

That caught him off guard for a moment. He nodded. “Thank you, Frances.” she smiled broadly at him and he went outside with Kate. Sure enough, there was Charlie on his pony with Rosemary holding onto the lead. Kate was right. He didn’t want to miss this. He continued down the steps and moved closer to Charlie. Charlie looked up at him as if he’d seen the sun rise for the first time. “Hello, my boy. Are you having fun?”

“Yes, da!”

“Miss Kate!” Kate turned to see Clara, one of the kitchen maids hurrying towards her. “You have a visitor!” She said excitedly. “In the kitchen.”

Kate frowned and shot him a direct look. “I’m not expecting anyone.”

He straightened up as Clara said. “It’s a man! Irish. His name is Declan and he’s looking for you!” Kate’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped. “He’s brought flowers and he’s so handsome!”

And just like that, the day was f**king ruined.

Chapter 26: Taking out the nanny

“Send him away.”

Kate said as the exact moment Thomas asked. “What’s he want?”

Clara looked back and forth between her and Thomas before deciding to address Thomas. “I-I don’t rightly know Mr. Shelby.”

“Send him here in the library then. When he gets there, let me know,” he shot her a direct look. “and we’ll find out.”

“Right away Mr. Shelby.” Clara said as she turned to hurry away.

“And Clara,” she turned towards him as he rumbled. “no rush.”

She frowned, but nodded. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.”

Kate’s heart began to pound in her chest. She had no clue what Declan was doing here and she had no idea why he’d even brought her flowers! Thomas, he’d been in a decent mood, now, there was a storm in his eyes. He didn’t like Declan. She knew that, so she had no idea what in the world possessed Declan to come over here! Thomas, that look in chilled her to the bone. She wasn’t scared of him, not in a fearful way. She was kind of scared of him in a good way. She didn’t know how that made sense, it just did to her. He wasn’t jealous of Declan, he was above such petty emotions. He was possessive. She belonged to him. He’d bought her and he owned her body. She was his until she’d paid him back. She knew this because she’d started to know him. No man, had any right to even look at her while she was his. And Declan, he was bringing her flowers and showing up at Thomas's property.

“Mr. Shelby,” Frances said. “there’s a gentleman on the phone for you.”

“F**k!” He groaned and looked up at the sky. He exhaled and shot her a look. “You wait outside. I’ll be back out in a minute. Understood?”

She nodded, slipping into that compliant mode that he liked in front of the staff and others. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.” he nodded and hurried into the library. The moment he was gone, she said. “Frances. Clara is supposed to be bringing a Mr. Declan here. Can you make sure that he doesn’t go into the library and bother Mr. Shelby?”

She nods. “Yes, of course!”

As Frances hurried off, she turned back to the children. Rosemary was frowning. “Is he mad at you?”

“No.” she shook her head. “He’s not. He’s just a very busy man and busy men have things to do.” she walked towards Charlie and smiled at him. “I’m sure your father will be out soon.” Charlie nodded, a little pout on his face. She felt his eyes on her and she turned to see Thomas looking out of the window, a slightly sour expression on his face. She turned and pointed for Charlie. “Look, there’s your father right there.”

Thomas’s sour expression instantly vanished as Charlie looked up at him. Charlie waved with both, dropping the rein for a moment. Thomas nodded at Charlie and Kate handed him the reins. “Daddy’s watching!”

“Yes, he is.” Charlie took the reins. “Why don’t you show him?”

Charlie nodded and gave his pony way too enthusiastic a nudge, nearly knocking him backwards. But he caught himself and Kate trotted alongside the pony, watching Thomas out of the corner of his eye. He really needed to focus on the little things like this with Charlie. They meant so much more to him that Thomas could ever imagine.

“Here he is!” Kate’s head nearly exploded as Clara came out with Mr. Declan in his Sunday best and a handful of winter honeysuckle. Bold choice, considering that they were also known as ‘kiss me at the gate’. rather bold for a man who she hadn’t seen for two weeks to be bringing her. “Seriously! How’d you meet such a gorgeous man?”

Kate rolled her eyes and focused on Charlie. “Heels down.”

“Who’s he?” Charlie asked.

She exhaled as she said. “He works for your father.”

“Oh.”

“Well,” she jumped at the sound of Declan’s voice so close beside her and realized that he was trotting up behind her. “today is my day off. I’m my own man today.”

She stopped and stopped the pony, holding a hand up. “Stop.” he did so with a frown. “You never run up behind any horse, especially when there’s a child on it. Mr. Shelby’s child, that’s something different all together. You don’t want him to cut your throat for getting his child thrown off, do you?”

He nodded uneasily. “Fair point.” he cleared his throat as he handed the bunch of winter honeysuckle, tied with a pink ribbon. “These are for you.”

She inhaled as she said. “Thank you.” not wanting to appear rude, she took them and smelled the honeysuckle. It did smell lovely. She turned and waved it under Charlie’s nose. “What do you think? Does this smell nice?”

Charlie laughed as she tickled his nose with the honeysuckle. She felt Thomas's eyes on her again and she ignored him. Declan got closer. “So, you’re good with children and horses.”

“And you’re not?” she inquired as she caught Rosemary’s eye, asking her to come closer, which she did.

“I think I’m good with kids.” he said. “Now horses, no. I’m not good with them.”

“Kate loves horses.” Rosemary said as she handed her the honeysuckle so she could resume teaching Charlie how to ride. “She’s a great rider.”

“Is she?” Declan asked as he started to walk behind her.

She gave Rosemary a subtle head shake. “Don’t walk behind the horse.” Rosemary ordered. “Sit on the fountain!”

“Alright.” he laughed. A slightly nervous laugh that said he was uneasy.

“What are you doing here?” Rosemary asked. “And why are you bringing my sister flowers?”

“Well,” Declan drawled, allowing his Irish accent to become even thicker. “I came here…to see if your sister would let me take you to the movies

“Me!?” Rosemary shrieked as Kate came to a dead stop in her tracks. She knew men liked girls younger. Lewis Carroll and Edgar Allan Poe were a few names that came to mind, but Rosemary was her little sister and there was no way she was letting a man like Declan get anywhere near her!!

She whirled around and shouted at the top of her lungs. “THOMAS!!!”

“Whoa!” He held up his hands. “Hold on---

“You,” she let go of the reins and bellowed at him. “want to take my kid sister out---

“You’re gross!!” Rosemary said as she hit Declan over the head with his flowers!!

“When Mr. Shelby gets out,” Kate shouts at him. “you better PRAY that you’re dead by the time I’M done with you!! What the f**k is wrong with you!?!”

“What I was saying,” Declan said loudly. “was I hoping that you’d accompany us. You said that you’re not emotionally ready to go out with anyone! So, if I asked you out on a date---

“No! No date!”

“That’s what I thought you said. However,” he held up his hand. “your sister is probably bored from being locked up here in the middle of nowhere, all alone.” her blood was still seething. she got where he was going, but she was still angry. “I used to take my younger brother, Christian, all over the place. So, I know how bored kids can get. But, obviously, as she’s your sister, I figured that maybe…you’d want to tag along.”

Now, she felt like an idiot. “Oh.”

He nodded as he crossed his arms. “Yeah.”

She exhaled before saying. “I’m sorry. I’m all she has and my head…went a very different direction.”

“Clearly. No offense but,” he tousled Rosemary’s hair. “she’s too young and I fancy redheads.” rosemary stomped on Declan’s foot. “Ow!”

“Rosemary!” She scolded.

“Oh, whatever.” she huffed as she walked away to stand by Kate.

Declan cleared his throat as he asked. “So, would you like to see a movie?”

She wasn’t sure. But after this disaster, she sorta felt obligated to go with him. “Are you sure, that’s a good idea? After everything that happened?”

“No.” Rosemary deadpanned.

“I think it is.” Declan said as he stepped forward. “It might do you some good as well.”

She bit her lip and then stated. “I don’t think, I’m allotted any days off. So, you’d have to check with Mr. Shelby.”

Declan’s face lit up as he took a step forward, his hands in his pockets. “Is that a yes?”

“It’s a maybe.” She said. “I don’t want to make any promises without knowing if I can get time off.”

On cue, the front door opened and out came Thomas. From the way his right arm was angled, she knew he had a gun behind his back. “Right. Declan. What are you doing here?”

“Mr. Shelby.” he stepped forward. “I came to see if Miss Carter would like to go to the movies with me.”

Thomas’s blue eyes darted over to her. “Movies, eh?”

She held his gaze as she said. “I didn’t make any promises, Mr. Shelby, as I’ve no idea as to what my schedule is.”

“She doesn’t know if she has any days off, so,” Declan cleared his throat. “I guess I’m asking as to what day she has off so I can make arrangements to take her out.”

“Take her out?” Thomas looked at her. “Does she want to go out with you?”

She inhaled as she confessed. “Maybe.”

His brow rose as he said. “Maybe.” she caught that dark possessive note in his voice, even if Declan and Rosemary didn’t. after a good long minute, he turned back to Declan and said. “Kate is still here on a trial period. That trial period ends the 31^st, which is a Sunday.” That was a lie. The 31^st was the day that she and Thomas resumed their normal sleeping arrangements. Knowing Thomas, he’d want to f**k her right before Declan picked her and Rosemary up to remind her that she was his. She may be going off with another man, but he’d be between her legs the whole time she was out. She didn’t know how this would work. How could she go out with Declan and then come back to Thomas? 10-1 the moment she walked through the door he’d have her on her back! She had a feeling that she’d be spending hours tied to his bed. “I’ll let her have Sunday’s off from here on out.”

“Thank you Mr. Shelby.” Declan said before turning to her. “So, the 31^st, I’ll come by around 11:00.”

“Perhaps, call the night before,” she suggested. “that way you can let me know what time the movie starts.”

“Alright.” Declan said, not even bother to hide the big grin “This’ll be fun!”

“Declan, what brough you out here?” Thomas inquired dryly. “Was it only you asking out my nanny?”

The way he said ‘nanny’ felt like an insult. She stared at him as if he’d slapped her across the face. It was so cold, almost derogatory the way he’d said that. It was almost as if he were calling her a whore.

“Ah yes.” Declan said. “Luke was going to bring the wedding dress up from Zhang,” Kate jolted at those words. “but, I got him to trade with me.”

“Did you?” he inquired. “Where’s the box?”

“In the kitchen.”

He exhaled as he said. “Well, say goodbye to Kate and then tell Clara to bring it up to my library. There’s work to be done and she's on the job. I don't pay her to talk with you.”

“Alright.” Declan leaned forward and planted a kiss on her cheek before she could smack him. She brought her hand up, but tamped down the urge. It was an innocent peck on the cheek. It meant nothing. “I’ll see you on the 31^st.

She could only nod. “Alright.”

Declan hurried off down the side of the house and she turned to Thomas. He’d tucked his gun into the back of his trousers. He looked at her for a second before turning to Charlie. “Hello my boy. I’m sorry about that. You were showing me how well you ride, yes?”

“Yes!” Charlie said enthusiastically.

Kate took a step back and exhaled deeply. Something had changed and it had changed drastically once again. She didn’t know what had happened or why. It couldn't be because of Declan. This went beyond that. She could feel it. Thomas wouldn’t even look at her and she was glad. Because if he did he’d looked at her, she’d probably yell at him. But she felt as if she’d burst into tears if he didn’t look at her, so she didn’t know what the hell was wrong with her.

Chapter 27: January 31st, 1926

“Right you two, inside for lunch!” Kate said with a smile on her face.

That was probably the tensest fifteen minutes of her life. Thomas…he was making her uneasy. The way he kept looking at her and the clench of his jaw—he was pissed as hell. Not at her. He was mad at Declan, and she couldn’t help but feel like she was going to be anxious when he got her alone. Thomas now decided to ‘torture’ her by seeing how much pleasure she could take. He never took it easy on her. He always took her to the edge of passing out before satisfying her. But she was grateful that he’d stopped hurting her and let her do whatever she wanted to him.

“Kate,” he said in that authoritative voice of his. “Go in the library, check, and make sure that Zhang cleaned the dress before lunch.”

She nodded. “Yes, Mr. Shelby.”

She inhaled and moved to the library with him walking right behind her. The box was on his desk. She inhaled as he closed the door behind her. She walked over to the box and opened it with shaking hands. She wasn’t nervous; she could feel him approaching her, watching her, burning her with those damn blue eyes of his. She parted the paper around the dress and stilled. This wasn’t her mother’s dress. Her mother’s dress had satin that was beginning to yellow. This, it was stark white. It looked brand new, so they’d brought her the wrong dress.

She shook her head and began to fold down the paper. “This isn’t my mother’s dress. It’s too new---

“Kate,” Thomas said. “Pull it out.”

She shook her head. “Thomas, the dress was yellowing. This is white and---

“I know,” he said. “When I went to pick it up, Zhang asked if I wanted it restored.” Her eyes widened as she began to understand his words. “He said it’d take time, but I told him to go ahead. So,” he gestured. “Pull out the dress.”

She unfolded the paper, and she exhaled deeply. This…couldn’t be her mother’s dress. It was white. She’d never seen it white. It was impossible. She exhaled deeply as she pulled out the dress. She let out a gasp as the beautiful white satin shimmered in the room. It was beautiful. The beads… there’d been a few places where they’d gone missing, but they’d been replaced. The beads were a perfect match to the dress. She gasped as she held the dress up to her waist and let the skirt flow down.

“Oh.” she whispered. “Oh my God.”

“It look alright?”

“Yes.” She inhaled, trying not to choke down her tears. “H-how’d he get it w-white again?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I just paid the man, Kate. It alright?”

“Yes,” she carefully folded it up and put the dress in the box. She hesitated before approaching him. “Thank you.” She wrapped her arms around his waist. He didn’t react, but she didn’t care. “This means…so much to me.”

He didn’t react at first, then he ran his hand down her back. “Yeah.”

She didn’t want to look at him, so she said. “I don’t have to go.”

His hand tensed on her back. “Go where?”

“Out.” she said quietly. “If it’s going to cause problems---

“Problems?”

“I shouldn’t see anyone when I’m in this house.” She said quickly. “I know that it’s going to cause problems---

“You can see whoever you want, Kate,” he stated calmly. His tone was calm, but his fingers were creeping up towards her neck. He was going to fist his hands in her hair. She was starting to know him too well. “I don’t care. I just have one rule.”

“Don’t sleep with them.” she stated. On cue, he fisted his hand in her hair and tilted her face upwards so she had to look at him. He backed her up and pressed her against his desk, his leg between her knees. “I already know,” she licked her lips as she stated. “I’m your property.”

“Smart girl.” He said lowly. “Yes, you are. You’re my f**king property Kate. Every f**king inch of you.” She inhaled as he ran his other hand up from her waist to caress her throat. “No. It’s not going to be a problem. Because you’re going to f**king listen to me. Right?”

She nodded as she squeaked. “Yes.”

“Good.” He held her gaze. “On the 30th, I have an appointment. I won’t be back until late. It’ll be after midnight.” He studied her a moment. “After midnight…it becomes morning.” she knew what he was getting at. She could see it in his eyes. She could barely breathe as he rasped lowly. “When I come up those stairs, it’ll be the 31st. You’ll be all under the covers in your bed. I won’t be going to my bed.” His fingers flexed on her throat as she gulped. “I’m gonna find you, Kate. I’m gonna turn the handle of your bedroom door, without making a sound…and I’m going to f**king claim you.”

She wondered if she was going to faint before or after she lost control of her body at the way he spoke to her. “Tommy---

“Like you said, Kate, you’re my f**king property. You know that, so you already know what to expect. Right?”

“Somewhat.”

He nodded his head as he said. “Nothing personal, Kate. I’ll f**k you right before you leave to go with him.” she expected that. “I will also f**k you, the moment you walk in the door. And then once more for good measure.” He studied her before asking. “Understood?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“Good.” He ran his thumb over her chin. “You can let him touch you. You can let him kiss you. You can let him put his hand up your f**king skirt, I don’t care. But you will not let him f**k you. This,” he placed his hand over her vagina. “is mine, Kate. It’s f**king mine.”

She inhaled before whispering. “Until I’ve paid you back.”

“Yes.” he exhaled as he added. “You also don’t know if he’s f**king around with anyone else. If it’s a whore and she’s got the clap, he could give it to you and me if he’s not being careful.”

She made a face. “That’s a pleasant thought.”

“He’s a man.”

“Believe me, I know that.”

He nodded. “I’ve had you five times. That means you’ve paid off----

“200 pounds.” she said.

“Smart girl. So…how many more f**ks, until this agreement of ours comes to an end?”

“207.”

He nodded and said. “We agreed to no more than 2 a day, but,” he exhaled as he said. “expect to be f**ked more on Sundays.”

She did. “Yes, but…no more than four times.”

“Unless you can take it.” His voice was low and hungry as he stared through her with those damn blue eyes of his. Kate made a mental note that the date with Declan had to go wrong because Thomas was going to be out of control every damn Sunday. The thing that worried her was how quickly she accepted that fact. But when he released her chin and stepped away, Kate realized that she was actually looking forward to it!

---

January 31st, 1926

---

He didn’t know what he felt when he climbed the stairs. Tonight, or rather this morning, he and Kate would resume their normal activity of sleeping together. But for some reason, that all seemed tainted. He’d gotten too close to her. In a way you’re not supposed to get too close with a whore. Lizzie, for all her years of knowing him and his family, never got this close. Kate, he didn’t know what it was about her. She just wasn’t a normal woman. Polly, she was dying to get over here and meet her, and he’d been pushing it off. He’d finally agreed that she could come over today around 11:00, which happened to be the same time Declan was picking Kate up.

Declan was around the same age as Kate. He wasn’t too far from Kate’s age, if he recalled reading her folder correctly. But there was only a year’s difference between Declan and Kate. Thomas had been through so much in his lifetime that he felt ten years older than Kate, especially since she had a lively spirit and smile. Only when they were in bed together were they equally matched. The years and the stress seemed to roll off him when he was inside her.

He pushed the door to her room open. There was a fire going, and it gave him just enough light to find his way in. He turned on the far lamp. She was going to wake up, and she’d need some light to realize what was happening to her. He shrugged out of his coat and laid down his briefcase on the chair nearest the fire before moving to the bed. He looked at her for a moment, snug under the covers, her mahogany hair splayed over the pillowcase… she looked so peaceful.

Then he remembered that Declan was going to be taking her out today, and his blood began to boil. He remembered how John hated the idea of Lizzie going out with Angel Changretta and that had made no sense to him until this day. At least some of it makes sense to him. John was married, so it had been none of his business who Lizzie saw. But their past and previous engagement made it complicated. Kate wasn’t his ex-fiancée or anything like that, but she was his. And right now, another man was looking at her. Another man wanted her. It wasn’t her fault, not completely. Kate was a beautiful girl; men were always looking at her. But she didn’t think she was, so she remained oblivious to how she’d innocently intrigue men. He ought to know. He’d f**ked her five times that first night, despite her not knowing what she was doing, and he’d taken her out of that life and into his house without really thinking it through. Yes. She did things to a man.

She let out a whimper in her sleep, drawing his attention back to his purpose. He’d come here to claim what was rightfully his. He moved to the bed and drew the covers back to grant him access to her body. Pulling back the covers revealed that Kate had instinctively gotten ready for him. She wore a piece of black lace and nude satin that stopped well above her knees. He reached between her legs, getting harder each second at just the sight of her. She wore black lace underwear. He didn’t want to wake her until she was on the cusp of an orgasm. He drew a knife from his pocket and cut those lace shorts into pieces that he discarded on the floor.

His breathing started to increase as he put the knife on the nightstand. There was always this cat-and-mouse game between him and Kate. It just kept getting more and more intriguing. He slipped his hand between her legs and began to stroke her walls, making sure to pay attention to her clit. Kate was sound asleep, but her body wasn’t. she began to grow wet for him. After a few moments, she began to stir. He watched her face. He needed those green eyes of hers to open before he could plunge into her. He pinched her clit, and she let out a sharp moan. She stirred…and then those green eyes of hers blearily opened. He parted her legs as she mumbled a bit. He was ready, and she was ready, just not fully awake yet. He undid his trousers, lined himself up at her entrance, and thrust into her!

She jolted in shock. “Tommy!!”

He looked down at her as he got on top of her. “Yeah, it’s f**king me.” He began to f**k her in earnest. She caught a hold of his head and neck. “Told you… I’d be coming for you.”

She couldn’t speak. She just kept letting out these sharp little ‘ah’ sounds with each f**k. He now knew which spot drove her crazy, so he hit it every f**king time. Her eyes were closed, but she had her knees drawn up. She’d probably tried wrapping them around his waist but gave up. He gripped her knees and pushed them back to her face, allowing him to take her deeper and harder. Kate’s cries got sharper and more exquisite as she got closer. Declan could take her out every day for all he cared, but he’d never have this with Kate. No man ever would. She was his. Every inch of her was. He probably shouldn’t think about Declan when he was in Kate. When she came with a loud cry, only then did he realize that he’d been pounding harder into her than necessary. He found his release and buried himself in her, flooding her womb with his seed.

Zilpha informed him that Kate was indeed taking precautions so she wouldn’t wind up getting pregnant. It was a shame, really. She’d look amazing pregnant, and after losing a baby, she deserved to have another one inside her. As a rule, he avoided getting the women he slept with pregnant, but there was just something in him that wanted to mark Kate. He didn’t understand it. It was as if there was something stirring in his Romani blood. Kate let out a whimper underneath him, and he lowered his head to hers to kiss her. She needed aftercare after sex. It left her feeling satisfied and happier. He never did that with Lizzie, and he hadn’t needed to with Grace. However, they’d never known loss the way that he and Kate did. He had to admit that he did look forward to these few moments that they spent after engaging in sex. She caressed his face and returned his kisses. After a few moments of kisses and touching, she pulled away and looked up at him, more focus in her green eyes now.

He looked down at her, and for a moment, neither of them could say anything to each other. It was as if…there was a wall between them in this moment. As if there were things that they wanted to say to each other, but didn’t. Or rather, they couldn’t say it to each other. That…was new. That meant whatever they wanted to say was personal or intimate. That meant there were feelings. He couldn’t have feelings. However, his reaction to the way Declan or any other man looked at her suggested otherwise. He couldn’t have this. He couldn’t have her making him weak again.

He exhaled as he said. “Let’s take this to my room, Kate.” she nodded. This wasn’t necessary; it would hurt her, but it was necessary for them. “Time for you to start paying me back.”

As predicted, anger and then hurt flashed in those green eyes of hers. Her eyes were pure, like the purest of emeralds, and they betrayed every emotion to him. She nodded as she said tightly. “Yes, Thomas.”

He got off her, carefully removing himself from her as she sat up in the bed. She took a moment to rub her eyes. He grabbed his coat and briefcase before extending his hand to her. She looked at his hand as if it were a dog waiting to bite her, but she took it. He exhaled as they moved towards the door together. Things between them were always changing, always evolving, and always something new and different. They were lying to each other. The only time they couldn’t lie was when she was in bed with him and she got to see and feel him with all his defenses down. He wasn’t used to that. That had only been with Grace. So, why the hell was he letting Kate in and see him like this? It made no f**king sense to him, and right now, he needed things to make sense.

Kate was just supposed to be a girl in his bed. That’s all. She wasn’t supposed to become anything more than that to him, and he wouldn’t let her become more than that. He’d told John not to marry a whore. While Kate wasn’t, nor could she ever be, he’d made her into one. Like everything he touched, he ruined it. He ruined her. He’d ruined her in so many ways that it was impossible to make up for what he’d done to her. But when she got into his bed, spread her legs for him, and tugged that lace up to reveal her still wet entrance, he didn’t care anymore. They were both where they belonged for the moment.

With each other.

---

Chapter 28: Kate's first date

This was a bad idea.

She was confused about this whole thing. She wasn’t sure that she wanted to even go out with Declan after this. She wasn’t sure that she liked him at all! Rosemary didn’t like him! Sure, she was a kid, so her opinion didn’t matter that much. On the other hand, she hadn’t gone out on a date since John died. That was over 10 years ago! She had no idea how to act when she was going out with Declan! Why, oh why, had she EVER agreed to this!?

And Thomas, yes, he said that he had no problem with it. But he did; she knew he did. She could feel it. He was more territorial than an alpha wolf protecting its mate from an intruder. God! He’d had her twice last night. Well, that was technically this morning. When she woke around 8:00, he’d had her once more before letting her escape back to her room. The kids got up around 8:30-9:00 on the weekends, so she was able to hide. She hated sneaking around, but she didn’t want Rosemary finding out what she was going to be doing with Thomas every night. He was an early riser. He’d go out for a horseback ride. She knew that because when he’d had her around 8, he smelled of horses and cigarettes already.

Then, it was downstairs as if there was nothing amiss. He sort of had breakfast with them before going to his library. She could tell from the way he was looking at her and his promise yesterday that he was going to have her once more. Declan was coming around 11:00. It was 10:45, and she was brushing her hair. She hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Thomas yet, but she knew he was coming for her. She’d pulled out a slightly older dress, but it was nice. Green with a purple trim and yellow flowers. Yellow roses represented friendship, but they also represented jealousy and infidelity in the past. No. This probably wasn’t a good dress to wear for a first date. It didn’t bode well. She moved to her closet to pick out another dress.

Click.

Her door opened, and she turned to see Thomas coming towards her, his belt already undone. He was carrying his coat, and he threw it on a writing table upon entering. When he said "before," he literally meant before. He locked the door behind him as she shook her head. “Thomas---

“Car coming up the f**king drive.” He grabbed her and pulled her against him. “Gotta be him.”

“But,” he moved to put her on the bed, and she said. “Don’t! I don’t want my dress wrinkled!” He let out a groan before moving her to the couch. He didn’t lay her on it; he pressed her against the back. He pushed her shorts down and checked that she was able to take him before thrusting fully into her. “Oh!”

“Quiet, Kate.” He ordered. “Else people will find out what I’m doing to you.”

She tried being quiet; she really tried, but it was so hard when he was in a mood like this. When he brought her right leg up to wrap around his waist, she was struggling as he pounded into her. She shook her head and begged. “T-T-Thomas…s-slow, oh!”

He exhaled. “Bite my shoulder.”

He wasn’t wearing his coat, so she could. She bit, and she bit him hard. He let out a growl, gripping her tighter as he pounded so hard into her that she felt like her head was going to fall off her head! Then finally, he brought her over the edge, and they came together. She let out a moan as she released his shoulder, noting that a seam was pulling away. That seam was dangerously close to where her mouth had been. He exhaled roughly, planting a soft kiss on her neck. “Good girl.”

God, she let out a sob as she nearly fell apart. “You…are a f**king arse.”

“Yes.” he said as he continued concentrating on her neck. “You knew I was f**king coming for you.”

“You’re late.”

“He’s early, so he can f**king wait.” His hand slipped between them, finding where their bodies were still joined. “Maybe I’ll keep you up here. F**k you on my cock again before letting you go off with him.”

“Rosemary,” she whispered. “will come looking.”

“Don’t care.” He said quietly.

She inhaled before croaking. “Y-you said I could go.” He went still, and when he lifted his head to look at her, she said. “I won’t go if you don’t want me to go.”

He was silent, almost as if he were debating something, and then he said. “Yeah, I want you to go.” That hurt a little bit; she didn’t know or understand why it did. He exhaled as he said. “Your John’s been dead for 10 years; you need to go out and meet someone.”

She hesitated before saying. “You should---

“No.” He exhaled. “Not there yet, but you are. What happens in here between us… it’ll get confusing at times. Let’s not forget that. Men like me,” he said lowly. “Well, you already know what we do to women like you.”

“Thomas---

“And if you ever forget what kind of a man I am,” he stated. “You just remember how I f**ked you in your mother’s wedding dress.” She went still. Remembering how humiliated, disgusted, and sick she’d been that day. He’d changed; he’d been kind to her. Having Zhang restore her mother’s dress wasn’t an easy or cheap task. Taking frail and yellow fabric and turning it back to white had been a painstaking task. Not to mention chasing down and finding beads from 30 years ago had been hard. In truth, she’d have been satisfied with just his stains being gone from her dress. He’d gone above and beyond in trying to amend that wrong. He hadn’t said it, but sometimes actions spoke louder than words. He didn’t do words at all. His actions in that instance had been screaming at her. “That’s the kind of man I am.” He said lowly. “Declan… he’s a good man. Not sure if he’s the one, but there’s a good chance he’ll overlook everything that’s happened between us and marry you in the end.”

“And if he doesn’t?” she asked quietly.

He didn’t answer her. He just cleared his throat before getting out of her. She shook her head as she got her clothes in order. “Got something for you.” He moved to where he’d chucked his coat on the little table by the door. Underneath his coat was a small pistol. “Here you go. I already know,” she approached him, trying to ignore how wet she felt. Her undergarments were already damp. “that you know how to use one. So, it should fit in your purse.”

She smiled. “Thank you. But is this a subtle indication to me that you don’t trust your men?”

“Oh, I trust my men to do their job. But men, they act differently around a woman. So, he unlocked the door and stepped out of the room. “You have your little sister, so I wanted to make sure that you felt like you had a way to protect her if necessary.”

Though he denied it, he did have a heart on occasion. “Thank you.” He cleared his throat and went to leave. “Your coat.” She reminded him.

He nodded. “Yeah. Thanks.” He closed the door and then left. As his footsteps retreated down the stairs, she was struck by how lonely the sound of a closing door could make.

---

He was going to have to have Declan killed or fired. He’d have to figure out a way to do that, but he couldn’t. He was a relative of Harold Handcox, the Digbeth kid. He’d come here a few years ago to help out Mrs. Handcock and her sister. So, honor prevented him from doing anything to him. But by God, he wanted this man f**king dead! When Kate descended the stairs in that hideous green dress of hers, he wanted to plunge a knife into Declan’s stomach and just keep stabbing until he disemboweled the man! Who cares if he had to buy new carpet? It’d be worth it! How could Kate look absolutely amazing in a dress that was hideous? She was so beautiful that she made the dress beautiful.

Charlie had started crying when Kate went out the door. Kate, being the absolute angel that she is, turned around and held onto his boy for a minute. He could feel Polly’s eyes on him, judging them as Kate soothed and comforted Charlie. It took every ounce of his self-control to act like he didn’t care that she was leaving. Then she looked at him. And there was a moment. One moment where it was just them. It was less than a second, but it might as well have been a minute. Then she left. Declan had taken her hand and hurried her out of the house while Charlie kept wailing. Kate had looked back, tears trickling down her cheeks as she got in the car. Rosemary was in a sour mood as well, complaining that she wouldn’t have fun at the movie. He had to hand it to Declan. If he was able to bring both the girls back smiling, that’d be a major accomplishment on his end. If he were in Declan’s boots, he’d have just waited and hung out at the house for an hour or two. Probably in the backyard, letting Kate show him around until both Rosemary and Charlie felt better. That way he wasn’t holding a wailing Charlie, Kate wasn’t crying, and Rosemary wasn’t sulking.

After fifteen minutes of comforting Charlie, he handed him over to Frances, who took him up to his room. He sat in his chair and exhaled. He did not need this. He did not need this! Kate…she was supposed to just be a girl he was f**king, but she wasn’t. She’d managed to somehow fit into his family, and he didn’t understand how. He didn’t know or understand how or when she’d managed to do that. She wasn’t devious or conniving, so it had all just happened naturally. That confused him even more. He got up and poured himself a whiskey. The door to the library opened, and in came the last person that he wanted to see. Aunt Polly.

“Well,” she said. “that was quite the reception.” He nodded as he lifted his glass to his lips. “Since when do you let other men go out with your woman, Thomas?”

He coughed to avoid choking on the whiskey. “My what, Poll?”

“Come off it.” She said. “Do you really think we have no idea what’s going on with you?”

“Poll---

“You’re not sulking about anymore. Not since she walked into this house.”

“That’s because I’m f**king her.” he stated, causing Polly to go still.

He was being cold again, but he didn’t care. Polly was going to chase him into a marriage or something with Kate. He didn’t want to get married again. Grace, she was the love of his life. If he married again or even fell in love again, he was betraying everything that he’d shared with her. He was already betraying her by f**king Kate in her house, but that was temporary. He had Kate four times today. Starting tomorrow, she’d be under the 200 mark. He needed to get her out of his house as soon as possible. And he needed to shut up Polly and get any ideas that she had out of her head.

“I don’t believe you.” Polly said. “Not her. There’s no way in hell a girl like that would let you touch her before marriage.”

“I know.” He reached into his desk for the notebook that showed how often he took Kate. “Luckily for me, she needed money, and she needed money fast. So,” he handed her the notebook. “we came to an agreement. Every f**k, I take off 40 pounds.”

Polly takes the notebook and looks at it. Her face twisted in disgust as she tossed the notebook on his desk. “God, Thomas. You brought her in the house! She has a kid sister!”

“I know,” he exhaled as he sat down and picked up a pen, twirling it between his fingers. “Kate is getting paid, though. She takes care of Charlie during the day; I pay her wages---

“Then she lies down with you in the night.” She shook her head in disgust before stating. “God, you disgust me, Thomas.”

“What else is new?”

She studied him a long time as he took a drink. “What time did it stop becoming a simple f**k for you?”

He shot her a look. “Hasn’t.”

“Liar,” she snapped as she leaned forward. “I can always tell when you’re lying, Thomas. And right now, you can’t lie for sh*t.” he set his glass down. “Not after what I just saw.”

“And what is it you think you saw?”

She studied him and then said. “You’re falling in love with her.”

He shook his head. “No.”

“You are.”

“I’m not.”

“Thomas!” She said sharply. “I know it’s been a year since you lost Grace---

“Don’t.” he warned her.

“You’ve been alone for too f**king long. Do you think she’d want you to be alone?”

“I am NOT in love with Kate!” He shouted at her. “She is just someone that I f**k! That’s all! She can go out and see whoever the f**k she wants; I don’t f**king care! Once she f**king pays me back, she can f**king go! I don’t care!” He exhaled as he held Polly’s gaze. “I don’t give a f**k about Kate. She’s just the f**king nanny in the day and my whore at night. That’s all she’ll ever be! I’m not getting married again! Grace was the love of my life!”

“Strange how you said ‘was’.” she observed, causing his blood to run cold. “For months, you’d say that she ‘is,’ almost as if she were still alive. This…was the first time that you said it as if she weren’t the love of your life anymore. So the question is…if Grace isn’t…then who is?”

He couldn’t answer that. He wouldn’t answer that. He inhaled as he said tightly. “Out of my house, Poll.”

“Is it that girl?” She asked him directly. “Are you in love with Kate?”

He felt a pain in his finger as he repeated. “Polly, I have things to do.”

She nodded before stating. “Look at your hand, Thomas.” He did. His hand was covered in black ink. He’d snapped his pen in half and gotten ink all over the table. “For a man who says he doesn’t give a damn about his f**king nanny, you just broke a pen when I asked if you were in love with her.” She picked up her purse as she said. “You better drop that f**king debt of hers and tell her what’s going on in your head before you make this an even bigger mess than it is. I don’t know why you want your life to be overly complicated. But love doesn’t have to be.”

He said nothing to her. He just stood there, staring at the ink on his hands and carpet. How? How had something as simple as taking a girl to his bed turned into something so complicated? Why was he having conflicted feelings when he looked at her? Why did he want to kill Declan? Why was he feeling bad about betraying Grace, their love, and everything they shared? He couldn’t be in love. He wouldn’t be in love.

He needed to get some air.

He finished his whiskey and stormed outside. He needed to go for a ride, and by God, did he need some quiet! He needed to think. He needed to breathe, and he couldn’t do that with any of them around!

---

Chapter 29: In the stables

Kate had never been so relieved to see the Shelby mansion in front of her. That date had been a semi-disaster, but she didn’t show it.

The car ride had gone well, but it was when they didn’t go to the movie house that she got a little bit on edge. It turned out that Declan hadn’t bought tickets for the noon showing. He’d bought tickets for 2:00!! He had other plans but hadn’t discussed it with her beforehand. In fact, he’d forgotten to call the house last night. So he’d called early this morning, around 8:00, right in the middle of Thomas taking her for the third time that morning. His simple message with Frances had been that he'd be there at 11:00 to pick her up. So, Declan had taken them to Warwick Castle. She didn’t have the right shoes, but it had been interesting to see. Rosemary hated it and sulked the entire time. Declan ignored Rosemary’s attitude gracefully enough, so she put on a good face and listened to him talk. Declan should have been a historian the way he talked about everything inside the castle, even though it was his first time being there. History had never been one of her better subjects, so her head was spinning.

When they got in the car, she was almost relieved. However, that was when Declan brought up it was time for lunch. Kate saw indeed that the clock was nowhere near 2:00. They’d had lunch in a little pharmacy, and Rosemary only perked up when he bought her a soda. Afterwards Declan showed that he’d bought tickets for…Moana. Now, that would have been alright had there been nothing else of interest playing. There was a comedy with Buster Keaton called The General playing. She didn’t want to watch The Scarlet Letter. A comedy would have been appropriate, especially with Rosemary. But Moana was a documentary. For the next 90 minutes, they were stuck watching a documentary about a family in a Samoan village.

When they got out, it was nearly 3:30. Rosemary, who’d fallen asleep in the movies, had promptly begun to whine that she wanted to go home. She’d chastised her properly while apologizing to Declan. Declan had taken it well after they got into his car. He took a hold of her hand in the car. While she thought it was too forward, she felt terrible about how Rosemary had treated him. By 4:00, they were sitting in front of the Shelby’s mansion. Rosemary didn’t even say thank you; she just got out of the car and ran into the house.

She turned towards him. “I’m sorry. She’s been a bit grouchy because she starts school tomorrow.”

He laughed good-naturedly. “Oh! Oh, no wonder the child is so miserable. She’s getting a late start as well.”

“Yes. Thank you for being so understanding.”

“Oh, no worries. As I said, I had a younger brother. I know how they hate going to school.”

“Indeed.” Declan took a step forward, gently caressing her face. She exhaled shakily, unsure of what to do. His touch was gentle and friendly, but it didn’t spark anything within her.

“So, when can I see you again, a chuisle?”

That had to be a term of affection, but it was too soon for such things. “Uhm,” she licked her lips as she took a step back. “I don’t think it’s proper for you to…not on the first.”

“You’re right.” He cleared his throat as he dropped his hand before asking. “So, when would it be proper for me to touch you?”

She bit her lip. It didn’t feel right. Not with Thomas around. So, she told him honestly. “I didn’t kiss John until we were engaged.”

His face froze. “Engaged?”

That wasn’t quite true, but she needed a reason for Declan to keep things different than her and Thomas. Her mind had wandered during the documentary. Everything with Thomas was so physical. Declan wanted to get close, but she didn’t want him all over her just yet. She wanted to try to get to know him a bit better first. “Yes. So…not for a while.”

“Alright. I’ll try to be a bit more patient.” The sound of horse hooves thundering caused them to turn and look. There was Thomas, riding toward them on his way to the stables. She swallowed as she watched him go galloping into the stables as if the devil were chasing him. That’s not surprising. The devil was always chasing after him. Declan shook his head as he said. “Geez, he seems mad as hell.”

“Yes,” she frowned. “I think that there’s something wrong. I wonder if something happened.”

“He’s always mad. Probably no madder than always.”

She cleared her throat, inhaling uneasily as she spoke. “Possibly. But…he’s been under a lot of stress. He loves his horses, and…he wouldn’t treat his horse like that if something weren't wrong.

He exhaled. “If you say so. But remember, today’s your day off. You don’t have to do anything other than enjoy your day off.”

She exhaled as she said. “I know, but my job is taking care of his son. I don’t think I’d be able to look him in the eye if his father got hurt.”

Declan exhaled as he said. “Well, I’m going to get going. It’s a bit of a drive, but I had a lovely time with you. Shall I pick you up again on Sunday?”

She cleared her throat as she said. “Call me first. Ok? Saturday, around noon?”

“Alright, a chuisle.” He kissed her on the cheek. “Till we meet again.”

She nodded as she spoke. “Till we meet again.”

She stood there and watched as Declan drove away. She waved at him, smiling until she couldn’t see him anymore. He was a charming man. While she didn’t feel anything for him now, she could feel something for him in time. He was a good man, intelligent and kind as well. There was probably a lot more to him, and she was curious to see a bit more of him. But for now, there was an angry Thomas Shelby in the stables, so she needed to find out what was wrong with him.

As she approached the stables, she saw two of the stable hands leaving. “He’s f**king mad!” One of them groused angrily.

She nodded and continued. The other hand said. “I wouldn’t go in there. He said he don’t want no one in there.”

She exhaled as she said. “Thank you for that.” She moved to go into the library anyway. She inhaled as she entered the stables. The main door was shut but not locked.

As she drew the doors open, Thomas shouted at her. “I f**king said, I want to be left alone!”

She shook her head. “Thomas? Is everything alright?” no answer. She moved further into the stables, looking for him. Thomas was in a stall with his hand around a rake. His fingers were white because he was clenching the rake so tightly. She was now concerned. She exhaled as she approached him. “Are you alright? Did something happen?”

Thomas came out of the stall, and he slammed the door behind him. The rake fell from his hands as he walked over to her, his eyes blazing. He was in the devil of a mood. He grabbed ahold of her face and kissed her with passion! Kate let out a startled yelp as he pushed her up against the stable wall. The clanking of metal and the sensation of leather and metal in her back told her that she was against the wall with the bridles. She gasped as she held onto Thomas's shoulders. He kept kissing her; his mouth…it was all over her. Her cheeks, her neck, her nose, her mouth. He’d never…he’d never kissed her like this before, and it was almost frightening.

Thomas reached up under her skirt. He found her shorts and ripped them off her, causing her to let out a cry as they broke. Something was bothering him. His hand went to his trousers, and she gripped his shoulders tightly, readying herself for this. Suddenly, he kicked her legs apart, taking her off balance for a moment. She let him go to steady herself against the wall right at the moment Thomas found her entrance and plunged into her. Kate let out a sharp scream as Thomas buried himself so deeply inside her it was as if the wind had gotten knocked out of her! She gripped the bridles tightly as her senses reeled.

Thomas gripped her hips tightly, holding her in place as he withdrew completely only to plunge back into her. Kate gripped his shoulders tightly, crying out with each thrust. All the while he kept breathing against her face as he took her deeply. Kate was crying out, gasping, and shrieking as Thomas chased his release as she found her high. Her head was spinning, and she was shrieking so loudly that she was probably scaring the horses, but he didn’t tell her to shut up or anything like that. He let her scream. When she finally came, Thomas thrust roughly into her one last time. So roughly that she felt as if she were impaled on his cock as he flooded her. Her head dropped to his shoulder, and she held onto him. Only when her feet touched the ground did she realize that she’d stretched up to her toes.

Kate was stunned for a moment, but Thomas's kisses brought her back to the present. She stood there, with her head lying on his shoulder as he kissed her. His tempers and moods, the way they switched back and forth, were almost fascinating at times to behold. He was a hard man to read, but there were little moments like now when she could feel him allow himself to be read. Whatever had been bothering him had stopped bothering him the moment he kissed her. Everything else was for his release, and considering how much stress this man put himself through daily, he did need constant relief. For a long time, neither of them spoke. It was just them breathing. They were skin to skin, and nothing else mattered.

Thomas kissed her neck, calming her racing pulse. “You alright?”

She could only nod for a moment, and then she asked him. “Feel better?”

He frowned as he looked at her. “What?”

“You really think… I didn’t know that you were counting down the hours till you could f**k me, Thomas Shelby?”

He looked at her as if she were mad and asked. “What the f**k is wrong with you?”

“A lot.” After a moment of silence, she just started laughing at him.

He rolled his eyes as he wrapped his arms around her. “You are f**king mad, woman.”

“Is that…a surprise to you?”

“No.” He exhaled as he pulled her close to him. “Come here.”

“I can’t get any closer.” He lifted her leg and slid into her, causing her to inhale. “I was wrong.”

“Shut up.”

“You shut up.” He kissed her, and she moaned. She liked this, the way that he took care of her afterwards. He never used to, but he did now, and she liked it. It made her feel as if she were someone that he actually cared about. Yes, he didn’t care for anyone, least of all her. But knowing that he cared enough to put some effort into her comfort was wonderful for her. Especially considering how rough he was with her in the beginning. This was good.

After a moment he asked her. “How was it?”

She shrugged. “Alright.”

“Is that all?”

She exhaled as she caressed his face. “This was for you, not for me.” He exhaled and rubbed his brow. ‘It’s alright, you didn’t hurt me. It’s just… I know something happened. You probably won’t tell me what it was, but I know because of the way you handled your horse. But, you feel better now, so that’s a relief.”

“Yes.” he said quietly. After a minute he said. “Had an argument with Polly about Grace.”

“Oh,” she lowered her voice. “I’m sorry. I recall you saying that she didn’t approve of you two marrying.”

“Not. But Grace was my wife,” his fingers dug into her hips. “my wife.”

“Of course she is.” Kate said gently. “I know they didn’t like her, but she was your wife. You have the right to mourn her as you see fit. After ten years of being alone,” she shook her head as she said. “maybe the memories will be enough in the end.”

He studied her and asked. “So, it was that bad, was it? That date?”

She snorted and rolled her eyes. “Don’t act like you’re sorry.” He withdrew from her, and they got their clothes in order. “You f**ked me before and after the date. I’m not really aware of much of anything else.”

“You managed to do math after I f**ked you.” he said as he went back to the fallen rake. “Don’t make things up, Kate.”

“Ah, thanks for bringing that up.” she stated. “When we were watching this documentary---

Thomas frowned. “He took you to a f**king documentary?”

She exhaled as she said. “He wants to explore; it’s a passion of his. Now, do you remember how yesterday we said I had 207 more times with you?” He nodded as he stepped into the stall. “Well, I forgot to give myself a raise. That was if I was earning 40 pounds a f**k. I’m not; it’s 45.” he frowned as she added. “So, it was 188. Now it’s181.”

He nods as he adds. “Tonight, let’s make it an even 180.”

She bit her lip and said. “Maybe, no promises.”

“Alright.” She walked over and began to pet the horse who had his head out of the stall that Thomas was cleaning. “So,” he exhaled deeply as he said. “How’d things go with you and your boyfriend?”

She’d never wanted to kill Thomas more.

Chapter 30: Surprises

“It was one date.” Kate said. “And he’s not my boyfriend.”

“Really?”

She snorted. “It was one date, and it wasn’t that much fun.”

He shook his head as he asked. “So, where’d he take you?”

“Warwick Castle.” He turns and looks at her shoes. “I know, it wasn’t one of the better ideas.”

“He wanted to hold your hand.” He said. “Only reason to have you walking through ground like that in those shoes.”

“Well,” she approached his horse and rubbed his nose. “He didn’t. He walked beside me the whole time.”

“And then he took you to the movie?”

“No, we went out for lunch at a pharmacy.”

“Hold on,” Thomas paused where he was raking. “he took you to a castle, which is free on Sundays. He takes you to a pharmacy where the food is cheap, and then he takes you to a documentary that has tickets for half-price.”

“And?”

He exhaled as he said. “He’s f**king cheap Kate.”

“That’s not a nice thing to say.”

“Kate,” he exhaled as he leaned on the rake. “it’s the first f**king date. If he couldn’t afford it, he should have waited a week, saved up, and then took you somewhere nice and let you pick the f**king movie.”

“That may very well be,” she stated as she continued petting his horse. “but nowhere did I say that I wanted to go with him. It was an idea, so I just went with it.”

He was silent a moment before asking. “What’d you two talk about?”

She shrugged as she admitted. “I don’t know.”

Thomas let out a sharp laugh. “Really, Kate?”

“What?”

“No wonder it was a f**king lousy date!”

“There was nothing to say, so he did most of the talking.”

“Oh, I wonder why!” He came out of the stall with the rake in his hand. “You have a big mouth---

“Hey!”

“Oh, don’t f**king give me that.” He stated. “You do. I’ve told you before that you and that f**king mouth of yours won’t shut up!”

“Well, I’m sorry!” She snapped at him. “I’m sorry if walking through gardens and being told rubbish things like “thou art more fair than this” and other nonsense doesn’t impress me.” She exhaled as she rubbed her head. “Rosemary was angry, sulking, and snapping the whole time, so…everything was an argument.”

He hung up the rake and walked over to her. “That f**king bad, Kate?”

She sighed as she said. “Boring as hell.”

“You gonna see him again?”

She exhaled as she said. “I told him maybe. I don’t know. I don’t feel anything, but it’s been years since John.” She bit her lip before saying softly. “Not everything has to be a spark.”

He was silent, and then he said. “You’re not the type to settle.”

She exhaled as she said. “I don’t know what I am anymore. I thought I’d marry for love…then I lost John. Companionship is now something I could consider, but,” she shook her head as she said. “I think if I were married to Declan, I’d be bored out of my mind.”

“But you’re going out with him again.” he pointed out. “Why?”

“To see if I’m wrong.” she admitted. “He is nice, he’s polite, well-mannered, and respectful, and he doesn’t swear. He’s intelligent as well.”

He was silent before taking her hand and guiding her towards the closed barn doors. “And that’s good. As long as he can figure out what he’s going to do for the second date.”

She laughed and smacked him. “You’re terrible.”

“Well, tell me.” he said. “What would be a perfect date for you?”

She exhaled. “I don’t know.”

He snorted. “You are definitely part of the problem, Kate!”

“No, it’s just…it’d have to be with the right person.” she exhaled as she said. “I don’t like going out and doing so many things at once. The castle, pharmacy, and movie. The castle or movie should have been eliminated.”

“Movie, right?”

She nodded. “God yes.” He opened the barn door for her, and she moved ahead of him, pausing as he opened both doors. She hesitated before admitting. “I’m a bit all over the place, I’m afraid. I like simple things. A horseback ride in the morning to watch the sunrise would be nice. Sitting at a fire…in the middle of a field where we could watch the stars. Playing games by the fire or just sitting on a porch swing talking would be nice. A picnic by the beach or going for a walk in the forest. All of those would be fun.”

“None of those are much of a date.”

“It’s more about…him being there with me than it is about the money. I like some privacy. We all have to conform to the rules society has us play. I’d want to know as much of him as I could, and it’d be nice to get close to him without any barriers. We all hide so much these days.” He said nothing, so she shifted the conversation. “But there are activities that would be fun that cost money.”

“Like what?”

“I’ve always wanted to go to a pub.”

“Hold the f**k up.” He stopped and turned towards her. “You’ve never been to a pub?”

“No. I was raised in Oxford!” She reminded him. “Can you imagine the scandal of a prestigious professor's daughter being spotted singing, dancing, and drinking in a pub!? Still, that would be so much fun. At least, I hope it would.” She exhaled as she said. “I don’t like the movies, not until they figure out how to make people talk. I like the theatre better. Plays and classical music. Museums are fun as well.”

He nodded and then asked. “So, he better start saving up and bringing flowers when he comes to pick you up.”

She shakes her head. “If you really think he’s as broke as he presents himself, I doubt he can afford what I like. But that’s alright. It’s the thought that counts.”

He frowned as he asked. “What kind of flowers do you like?”

“Roses. Red, especially.”

He exhaled as he said. “They’re not that expensive, Kate.”

“If he’s saving up, then yes, they are. I like the red roses, with the dark, almost black tips.” She shook her head. “My mom had a whole garden of them that she loved. My dad tore them out when she died. I love the smell so much.”

Thomas was silent. She vaguely noted the stable hands coming from the kitchen with some food in their hands. She was glad they’d left the area; otherwise, they’d have certainly heard her screams. As Thomas reached for the front door, he asked her. “Got enough in you for one more round tonight?”

She bit her lip. She was a little sore, but he said tonight. She had 6 hours to recover, so that should be enough, especially with the salve. She bit her lip and asked. “Will you do it the way I like?”

He nods. “Yeah. Slow and gentle.”

She nods. “Then yes, I do.” He opens the door for her, and she passes under his arm. Something strange was going on in his head, and she couldn’t help but wonder what it was. He had a secret, and whatever it was, it was weighing on his mind. She'd get it out of him eventually.

---

February 21st, 1926

---

Kate let out a soft wail underneath him as he came inside her. He exhaled deeply as her heels dug into his back. Her fingers were in his scalp, and she was clutching him as if she were scared that he was going to break the desk underneath her. It was Sunday again. Kate had come into the library wearing a pretty white and lace day dress. She’d been borrowing a book, and that hadn’t been a problem. Her climbing up the ladder and revealing a white garter had caused him to get hard. By the time she started to come down, he’d already locked the door. He surprised her by grabbing her around the waist and carrying her to his desk. Once he had her on his desk, he ravished her completely.

Per their agreement, Monday through Saturday, he only took her twice a day. The timings varied throughout the morning, but his appetite for her was beginning to increase every evening. They engaged in intercourse around 16 times a week. Four of those times were just on Sunday alone. Today was Sunday. He f**king hated Sundays. He hated seeing Kate leave the house with that f**ker Declan and he hated, he HATED himself for even f**king caring! She was nothing to him. She was a body, and she’d soon be gone. That’s what he kept telling himself. Right now, he’d just finished spending himself in her for the 133rd time. Declan was supposed to be picking her up at some point, but a quick glance showed it was nearly noon.

He exhaled before asking her. “What time does Declan get here?”

“Hmm?” She exhaled. “Oh, he’s not coming today.”

He frowned. “Why not?”

“It’s his mother’s birthday today.”

He blinked. “And he didn’t invite you?”

“He did, but I said no.” She exhaled as she let her legs fall from his back. “I’ve only gone out with him three times. Bit soon to meet anyone’s mother.”

He nodded. “Right.”

She inhaled and said. “Besides, he was talking about walking around Alcester, and I don’t have the shoes for that.”

He snorts as he said. “You’re an indoor girl, Kate.”

“Both.”

“Whatever.” He leaned forward and kissed her, causing her to moan. Why the hell did she always have to taste so f**king sweet? He could lose himself in her so easily, and he did frequently. She was a temptress, and she was constantly tempting him. He didn’t want to fall for her; he didn’t want to love her. He just wanted to get through those few weeks they had together as quickly as possible. But he had a feeling that the day she stood at his front door with her bags in hand, he was going to lose his f**king mind. That meant that she was becoming a weakness that he didn't want to have in his life.

The sound of a car pulling up caused him to break the kiss. He wasn’t expecting anyone.

“Thomas?” She asked, concern in her voice. “Who is it?”

“I don’t know.” He pulled out of her quickly, and she hopped off the desk, moving towards the window as he grabbed a gun after getting his clothes in order. He moved to stand beside her, and he peeked out the window. He didn’t recognize the car; it was a maroon color. He’d never seen that color before. He shook his head. “I don’t know that car.” He tugged her back. “Go get the kids---

“Thomas, I think it’s Luca and Autumn.”

He frowned. “What? They’re in Italy!”

“They’ve been gone for two months.” She said. “They could have come back. I recognize the color. It’s most likely Luca’s car.”

He waited. He trusted few people, but he trusted Kate’s judgment. The car parked, and the side passenger door opened. Sure enough, Luca Changretta got out of the car, and he hurried around to the other side of the car. Luca helped Autumn out of her seat, giving her another kiss on her lips. Yup, these two were just as lovey-dovey and disgusting as they were at their wedding. Thomas exhaled as he put the gun on his desk. “What the f**k are they doing here?”

“I have no idea.” Kate went back to the desk and pulled her shorts back up her smooth, white arse. He made a note that one day when she was being really bratty to redden it. He wasn’t sure, but he had a feeling that she’d like that. Kate, while being very proper out of bed, was an absolute tiger or angel in bed. She exhaled as she said. “I’ll go let them in.”

“I’ll just stay in here.”

“She’s your sister.” She reminded him. “You can’t hide from her forever. He’s family now.”

“Whatever.”

“Thomas,” she said firmly. “don’t make me pull out a gun again.”

He exhaled as he looked her dead in the eye. “Do that again and I’ll punish you, Kate. Hard.”

Damn minx didn’t blink. “Whatever. Get your arse out here and say hello to your sister!”

Again, she slammed the door to his library, causing him to exhale. Oh…she was asking for it.

---

Chapter 31: Dresses from Italy

Kate inhaled, waiting for them to ring the doorbell, which they did. Thomas didn’t come out, which was a disappointment. She contemplated going and getting a gun, but he was getting…creative with his torture, so she wasn’t sure what he’d do. Last time she’d stuck a gun to his head, the torture had been extremely pleasant. The first time…that had been utter hell.

The doorbell rang, and she waited a moment before opening it. Luca and Autumn Changretta stood there with two boxes in their arms. “Kate!” Autumn said with a smile on her face. “Oh! I’m so glad you’re still here!”

“Well,” she said with a smile as the library door opened behind her. “your brother does have a difficult time finding people to put up with him, but he does tolerate me.”

“Kate---

The warning in his voice caused them to frown. She shook her head and ignored him. “Won’t the two of you come in?” Autumn and Luca both turned towards Thomas, silently asking for permission. “They brought presents!” Kate pointed out.

He exhaled and waved them on in. “Yeah, it’s fine.”

She stepped back so Luca and Autumn could come in. She took a moment to look at Thomas. He had one hand on his hip, and he was leaning against the frame of the library door. He’d left his coat on the back of his chair, and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbow. For a moment, Kate paused to note that Thomas actually was a very handsome man. Well, she’d thought he was good-looking the first time she saw him. But, the way things had started off between them, his looks had seemed to fade and twist into something dark. But he’d changed towards her, and it was almost as if his looks were being restored to him. This, however, was the first time she noticed him in that way.

No.

She wasn’t going to start thinking that way about Thomas Shelby. He was her boss during the day, and she was his whore during the night. Thomas was still deeply in love with his wife, Grace, and she wasn’t available. She was seeing Declan, and since the first date was a disaster, he’d started making a bit more of an effort. The following week he’d taken her to a fair, and that had actually been so much fun. She’d brought her own money, and she managed to gently persuade him to let her buy a few things. The Sunday after that, he’d taken her out to the middle of nowhere to meet a camp full of gypsies. He’d come to pick up a bridle or something for Thomas. That had taken a strange turn because one of them was named Johnny Dogs.

Kate knew that name, and she’d asked him if he knew Tommy Shelby. Johnny did, and he promptly asked her if she was the mad wench who’d pulled a gun on Tommy. She and Johnny had hit it off and spent a good two hours talking. Johnny’s wife persuaded them to stay for lunch, which she’d enjoyed until Johnny announced it was pigeon stew. She laughed it off, but Declan had gone green in the face. Johnny gave him something to wash it down. She got to ride a horse before going off with Declan. Declan had made it a mile down the road before throwing up. She’d gotten him a cup of water from the river, which he’d refused to drink as it wasn’t sanitary. She pointed out how there was white around the rocks, but he wouldn’t drink it. She did persuade him to at least rinse his mouth out. Declan joked that they were cursed to alternate between good and bad dates. She was inclined to agree with him.

“Here.” She came back to focus as she realized Autumn was holding a box out to her. “I brought this for you from Italy.”

She stared at her. It was clearly a dress box. “T-thank you.”

“I know,” Autumn was wearing a pretty, floral dress herself with bright blue shoes. “you’re Tommy’s nanny and all that. But I saw this in a store window in Italy, and I couldn’t help but buy it for you.”

She stared at the box. It was a beautiful gold box with a red bow on it. Clearly couture or something. It was a foolish purchase; she’d never have a reason or opportunity to wear it. “Thank you.”

“Open up the box, Kate.” Tommy said as he sauntered over. “You can’t thank them if you don’t know what it is.”

She rolled her eyes as she moved to set the box on the receiving table. Luca murmured something in Italian to Autumn, which caused her to shake her head. “Amore, behave.”

Those two were as deeply in love as they were from the moment they married. It was rather sweet to witness, even if it did make her long for someone who loved her as deeply as Luca loved Autumn. After untying the ribbon, she lifted the lid, and Autumn took it from her. “Thank you.” She folded back some fabric and found herself staring at a beautiful white and gold dress. She gasped. “Oh, my.”

“I know!!” Autumn said, not even bothering to contain her excitement. “I couldn’t stop picturing you with your hair in this dress. I bought you two dresses, just in case one doesn’t fit or you don’t like it.”

Her jaw dropped. “Two? But this,” she pulled it out, holding the gorgeous dress to her waist. It had a gold and black damask belt that matched the trim along the hemline. It was beyond stunning. “it must have cost a fortune.”

“Nonsense.” Autumn said. “We’re having a party on Wednesday before going to America on Friday. It’s formal, with dancing, so we expect to see you there. In preferably one of the two dresses.”

Kate blinked. “Wednesday? I have to watch Charlie and---

“You get the day off.” Thomas said. “My sister’s leaving, so you can come.”

She shakes her head. “I can’t leave Rosemary alone---

“Frances will be here, and she’s old enough to take care of herself.” he said. “It’s one night, and we’ll be back the next day.” She bit her lip. He exhaled as he said. “I’ll have Declan come and watch the house. That way, you know that she’s alright. Ok? Will that work?”

Not really, but it was kind of him to make that offer. She nodded. “Alright.”

“Good!” Autumn said as she took the first dress from her, and she began to look at the next dress. “This second one was my favorite. I really hope you’ll like it.” Kate lifted out this creamy dress with black beads on it. She blinked as she saw the plunging back with a gold chain. The front had a plunging neckline as well. “There’s also a fan in the bottom of the box, but,” she smiled at her. “I couldn’t help thinking of you when I saw these dresses. You’ll look beautiful in them. Won’t she, Thomas?”

Thomas nodded. “Yeah.”

Autumn rolled her eyes. “Thanks for the encouragement, Thomas. Just what a woman wants to hear.”

“Well, while you two were off in Italy,” Thomas stated. “spending money and trying to load my sister with another Changretta.” She shot him a look. “Kate met one of my men, and they’ve been going out.”

Autumn’s and Luca’s faces froze for half a second. “R-really?”

“Three weeks,” Kate said simply. “it’s not too serious.”

“Sure.” Thomas said dryly before turning to Luca and Autumn. “What else did you bring?”

“Well,” Autumn cleared her throat. “I brought some chocolates for Charlie and Rosemary. I also brought Rosemary a hand-painted fan. I hope she’ll like it.”

“I'm sure she will.” Kate folded up the two dresses that she was sure that she’d never wear. “I’ll call them---

“Oh no.” Autumn said quickly. “No. I’ll go up. I’d like to see them. Besides, my husband has business to discuss with my brother. Right?”

Luca exhaled begrudgingly. “Si, my love.”

Autumn reached up and kissed him gently on the mouth, causing him to relax for a moment. “Grazie, mio bel principe.” Luca gave her another little peck on the lips before handing her the boxes of chocolate that were in the crate that he’d held. “Grazie. You and Tommy have some Nocino and talk.”

“Nocino?” she inquired.

“Ah, liquor made of black walnuts.” Autumn said as they moved towards the stairs. “Let’s put your dress away first, ok?”

“Alright.” Kate said quietly. “I’m sorry, I do love the dresses. I just don’t know when I’m going to wear it.”

“Maybe wear the second dress to the party. Wear the first one for when Tommy takes you out somewhere.”

Kate choked on her air. “W-what?” She inhaled as she coughed. “W-what are you t-talking about?”

“You and Tommy,” Autumn said as Kate pushed her into her room. “We noticed at the wedding the way he kept sneaking looks at you.”

“No.” Kate said. “No, there’s nothing going on with Mr. Shelby and me.”

Autumn looked confused. “But that,” she looked around a few times before saying. “that’s not what Polly said.”

Kate frowned as she set the box on the bed. “What? I-I don’t understand. What does Thomas's aunt have to do with this?”

“It’s just,” she cleared her throat as she said. “Polly said she talked to him and that there was something, well, stirring in him.”

Kate blanched. “Stirring?”

“Feelings.”

Kate shook her head. “No!”

“Polly's never wrong when it comes to matters of the heart.”

“Well, she’s got this one wrong! Believe me,” she inhaled as she sat down. “there is nothing going on between your brother and me. nothing that even remotely resembles a possible romance or anything like that.”

Autumn bit her lip and stammered. “I—I’m sorry, but…it was just so sure. He looks different. He looks happier now, and h-he’s actually gained weight.”

Kate shook her head as she thought about Thomas when he had her in his bed. It was nothing more than sex. If Thomas had any feelings for her, he certainly wouldn’t stand for Declan taking her out. It would explain why he was territorial over her, but no, he wasn’t in love with her or anything. That was impossible! “I’m sorry, I’m not responsible for any changes that he’s going through.”

Autumn studied her and then said. “I don’t mean to pry, but…are you sure there’s nothing going on between the two of you?”

“I’m positive.” Kate said quickly. “Thomas doesn’t care anything about me. He doesn’t even know I’m alive half the time. And I’m seeing someone else. Declan Walsh.”

“Declan.” Autumn inhaled as she said. “Sounds Irish.”

“Yes, he is. Thomas introduced us.”

Autumn frowned. “Strange. Why would he?” She shook her head. “I need to talk to Thomas.”

“That’s not necessary, I assure you. Declan is a very good man, and I like him well enough.”

“I don’t like him,” Rosemary said from the doorway, causing her to jump. “and its my opinion that matters most.”

“Rosemary,” she said firmly. “you’re not supposed to eavesdrop.”

“Sorry, but,” she inhaled. “Charlie wants a snack. So, I was hoping that we could have a snack. It is Sunday.”

“As a matter of fact,” Autumn said. “I brought you all some chocolates from Italy. How does that sound?”

Rosemary lit up. “I’d love some chocolate. So would Charlie.”

“I can imagine!” Autumn stood up, clutching the boxes under her arm. “Why don’t we ask someone to see if they have a knife? That way you and Charlie can see if you like the different flavors.”

“Alright! I’ll ask Ms. Frances.”

Kate shook her head as she watched Autumn and Rosemary leave the room. Thomas Shelby? The man who was dead inside…was developing feelings for her? What an absurd idea! She walked past a picture of Grace every day. She was a delicate, graceful, and feminine lady. Kate wasn’t any of those things, and Thomas needed another woman like Grace. She was so far from the kind of woman that Thomas would ever consider marrying. If they were married, he’d lose his mind within a year of the marriage and kick her out! Married to Thomas? God! If he was this feral when she was his whore, she hated to imagine what he’d be like when she was actually married to him! Besides, Thomas had a child. He’d probably want her to provide another sibling for Charlie, and she couldn’t do that. She shook her head. She had to stop thinking like this. She’d only ever come to Thomas's bed as his whore. Never as a bride or a wife. She exhaled as she left the room. She needed to see and talk to Declan before she started imagining herself in love with Thomas Shelby. She'd have to be mad to love or marry a man like him.

---

Autumn’s dress

---

---

1st dress for Kate

---

---

Second dress for Kate

---

Chapter 32: Luca's words

He did not like Nocino. Like all things Italian, it was strong and sticky-sweet. It tasted almost like a candy of sorts. However, he couldn’t recall a candy that was as revolting as this. So, he had to assume that it hadn’t been invented yet and it was some new form of torture that Luca Changretta was going to unleash on him.

After a few sips, he asked. “How was Italy?”

“Good.” Luca said slowly, clearly studying as if he were sizing him up for a funeral. “The weather was nice; my love enjoyed it very much.”

“Did she?”

“Si.” Luca nodded slowly as he said. “We bought a house there, by Lake Como. It’s getting some repairs done, but it’ll be our summer house.”

“So, you guys will just be living all over the place?”

“Yes.” Luca said calmly. “Mi Cara has always wanted to travel. We’ll spend the winter here. Spring and fall in America. summer in Italy.”

That made no f**king sense. “Alright. If that’s what she wants.”

“It is.” he said calmly. God, he hated the way Changretta talked. His voice grated on his nerves. “When my business has concluded, we will be deciding if she wants to live in America or Italy forever.”

He frowned. “You’d raise the kids in Italy?”

He nods. “I have a citizenship there. One in England and one in America as well. So, it doesn’t matter to me.”

“Alright.” He took another drink, and an awkward silence filled the room.

“I don’t want to be in here.” Luca stated lowly, a hint of darkness in his voice. “But as I’ve told my wife, I love her far more than I can ever hate any of you.”

He nodded. “Good to know.”

Luca was silent again before asking. “So… I’ve heard things about you and Kate.”

He frowned at those words. “What have you heard?”

“Your aunt talks to my wife,” he exhales as he says. “A lot. Your aunt says that you’re falling in love again.”

Thomas shook his head and internally groaned. No wonder Autumn bought Kate those dresses. Both would look very stunning on her, he had to admit. The second one… he could just imagine her in that dress. The fabric would look like it was painted on her curvy body. “I’m not.”

Luca nodded before stating. “I'm not an idiot; I can see that you’re just f**king her.” He leaned forward and stated directly. “For now.”

God, what was the matter with everyone? He exhaled as he lit a cigarette. “That’s all it is.”

Luca was silent a long time, and then he said. “I’ll never forget the first time I saw your sister in the club. Scared the hell out of me the first time I held her in my arms. Not because of how she made me feel…but because I knew I’d never find anything like this again in my life.” He grinned as he pulled a match from his pocket. “Then she f**king looked at me, and everything made sense in my life.”

He downed the Nocino and went to get himself a whiskey. “We’re discussing you falling in love with my sister. Why?”

“There is a proverb in Italy. L’amore un viaggio non una destinazione.”

He exhaled as he said. “I don’t speak f**king Italian.”

“It means, love is a journey. Not a destination.” Luca stared him down as he said. “You’ve not even begun your journey, so it will be a long and difficult one for you.” Ok, now he was getting confused. He turned towards Luca with his glass of whiskey in hand, struggling not to throw it at Luca. Luca was just relaxed in his chair, not even bothered. “Your journey is not meant to be the same as mine. Yours…had a rough start. You lost your wife.” Thomas just shot him a glower and fought the urge to remind him why he’d lost his wife. “If I’d lost Autumn in that way…there wouldn’t have been anyone involved who’d have been spared.”

Thomas exhaled as he stated directly. “You got lucky, Changretta. You got into bed with my sister.”

“Well,” he twirled that toothpick in his mouth. “if I’d known that she was a Shelby,” he pondered on it for a moment. “no. I doubt that my actions would have been any different towards her. Me being a Changretta made no difference to her. She wanted me as I wanted her.” Changretta studied him as he spoke. “I can imagine… It’s very hard to accept that.”

He frowned. “Accept what?”

“Wanting someone again, especially after losing someone you loved.” He frowned at Luca. “Must be hard, wondering if you open your heart up again if you’ll lose this person again.”

He inhaled as he said. “There is nothing going on with Kate and me. She owed me 8,500 pounds, and she’s paying me back.”

Luca’s brow arched. “Well, if it’s a matter of money, I have no problem---

“No.” The minute he said that word, it was obvious. It was too obvious, and Luca Changretta knew it. “She won’t take it.”

“She won’t take it or,” he inquired. “you know that if she does take it, she’ll walk right out your f**king door without looking back.” He needed more whiskey. “She cares for you.”

He didn’t want to believe that. He shook his head. “No, she doesn’t.”

“We saw how the two of you were looking at each other just now. She was…admiring you when you were against the library door. She was smiling at you, but I don’t think you saw because you were watching me help my wife. That’s the way it goes sometimes.”

“So you say.”

Luca exhaled tightly as he said. “Your sister said you’re a stubborn bastard and that you’d probably f**k this up.”

He inhaled sharply as he bit out. “I am not---

“You are.” Changretta said firmly. “You are f**king this up in so many ways. Your main problem is the f**king, you have to stop f**king her.”

“No.” he stated. “We have an arrangement---

Changretta exhaled. “Throw the arrangement out the f**king window. Go after her, tell her how you feel, and when she agrees to marry you, you can have her in your bed for the rest of your f**king life.” Changretta leaned forward as he said. “I always thought you were a man of honor. What you’re doing to her, to the woman that you are beginning to fall in love with…it’s not honorable.”

Thomas exhaled as he lifted his cigarette to his lips. “I am not in love with her. You, Polly, Autumn, and this entire f**king world can say what you want---

“I’m not one of the f**king women in your life.” Luca stated firmly. “You can say all these things to f**k around with my head like you do with them. But I’m a man. We both have,” Luca’s voice caught for a moment as he corrected himself. “had brothers. We all know when they’re f**king lying to us.” Thomas sat down at his desk as Luca continued with his stupid speech. “But I see what’s going on. You’re afraid.”

His blood bristled. “No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are. The great Tommy Shelby…is afraid to fall in love again.” Thomas got up from his desk. Changretta leaned back and took a sip from that black liquor. “Your family can’t f**king see it. I’ve seen that look in your eye in the eyes of others who’ve lost loved ones. It’s always so f**king scary to try again. And that one,” Luca shook his head as he stood up. “she’s a f**king firecracker. Going after a woman like her is like holding a bomb in your hand.”

He shook his head. “She’s not that bad.”

Luca shook his head. “That woman had a gun in your ribcage, and she didn’t blink. Takes a mad woman not to back down to you.”

He smirked at that. “Well, she is f**king mad. But,” he exhaled as he took another drag on his cigarette. “she is not cut out for this life.”

“You know that how?” Luca said. “You asked her…or you thought about her being in your life with you? He hated Changretta, and he hated Autumn for falling in love with Luca. Changretta exhaled as he said quietly. “What do you think…your wife would think if she saw you falling in love again?”

He inhaled tightly as he said. “She wouldn’t care, because I’m not.”

Changretta nodded before stating. “You probably think that if you stay alone, you’re being faithful to that love.”

“What love?” He demanded, growing weary of these pathetic mind games that Changretta was playing.

“The one you shared with your wife.” Changretta shook his head before stating. “You’re not. You’re being selfish.”

That was it. He spun around and shouted. “Get the f**k out of my house!!”

“ “Not only that,” Changretta continued as if he hadn’t even heard him. “you are disrespecting and betraying your heart by denying yourself a chance to be happy again; you’re hurting yourself.”

He was going to kill him. “ Changretta----

“Shut the f**k up Shelby!” Changretta snarled at him. He threw his glass at Luca’s head. Luca, for being a tall man, ducked quickly to avoid the glass. Luca straightened up and threw his glass at Tommy! Tommy dodged and went to his desk. “You’re hurting your f**king family. You’re depriving your boy of the chance to have a f**king mother in his life. He could have an older sister, and who knows how many other children you could have with Kate. You’re depriving him of all of that.”

He grabbed his gun from his desk and pointed it at Luca’s head. “Get the f**k out!”

Luca unbuttoned his coat. “I’m unarmed. My wife knows I’m unarmed, so…you will have murdered me in your house.” He shakes his head. “She will not forgive you.” Luca looked him dead in the eye as he stated. “My wife is pregnant.”

Tommy went still. “What?”

Luca exhaled. “According to the doctor…I got her pregnant on Christmas Eve. So, you murder me, and you not only take her husband but also the man who put a baby in her.”

Thomas was silent a moment before locking his jaw. “Fine.”

He slammed the gun back in the drawer. “Regardless of you taking her to your bed before marriage, you haven’t cheapened or disgraced her yet. There is affection between the two of you; it’s obvious.” Luca leaned forward as he stated. “But if you f**king let her walk out that door, into the arms of another man that she’s not in love with…you will regret that for every day of your f**king life.” Changretta stepped towards him as he said. “I didn’t f**king care. I wanted your sister. You all nearly caught me because of that. Power—it’s good to have, but it always ends up destroying men like us. Love…it comes so rarely. You got it a second time, so don’t f**king waste it.”

He wanted to believe that. But he knew that his life couldn’t be so lucky. He was damned to have bad luck for the rest of his life. Kate wasn’t. He wasn’t tying her to a life of misery with him. He cleared his throat as he said. “You’re forgetting something. She’s seeing someone else.”

“In amore e in guerra tutto è lecito.” he glowered at Changretta, who said. “All is fair in love and war. Until that man puts a ring on her finger…she is still yours to chase. You’re fine with waging wars, Tommy Shelby. Don’t tell me you’re too scared to wage one for the woman you love.”

He hit Luca Changretta. He didn’t care if he was family or not. He punched Luca Changretta in the face, and he didn’t feel sorry as Luca hit the ground.

Chapter 33: Knocked out

When Luca got up, Tommy was once again reminded just how tall Changretta was. He was a good 6 inches taller than Tommy. For a moment, Changretta stood there, blood dripping down his oversized nose. Tommy stood there, his fists doubled, waiting for Changretta to make a move.

However, Changretta pulled out a handkerchief and held it to his nose. “You are so f**king lucky… that I promised my wife today that I wouldn’t kill you.”

That was good. Changretta couldn’t lay a hand on him. “Well, no one said you had to marry my sister.”

“That’s true.” Tommy turned to walk back to get another glass for his whiskey. “I didn’t promise not to maim you.”

Tommy caught that a second too late. Next thing he knew, Changretta had slammed his head hard into the mantelpiece. He slammed him so hard that Tommy thought his skull had been fractured again. Changretta let him go, and Tommy sank to the floor as darkness filled his eyes. F**k. Not again! It was too late; the darkness swallowed him whole.

---

“I am really sorry about the misunderstanding.” Autumn said. “I feel so embarrassed.”

“It’s alright.” Kate said as they descended the stairs. “I understand why your aunt would get overly excited.”

“We just want him to be happy.” Autumn explained. “He hasn’t been happy in so long, and we thought…. I really thought that maybe you two had made progress since the wedding.” They had, but not in the way Autumn was thinking. The door to the library opened, and Luca Changretta came out with a bloody nose and a torn sleeve. Autumn gasped. “Amore!”

“I’m alright, mi cara.” He exhaled. “Tommy punched me in the face. I knocked him out.”

Kate blinked. “You knocked him out? How?”

“Cracked his head on the mantle.”

Kate stared at Changretta and then screamed at him. “Are you F**KING CRAZY!?!?” She ran into the library, pushing past Changretta and Autumn to get to Tommy. Sure enough, he was lying on the floor, the front of his head swelling, and he was out cold!! She knelt beside him. “Tommy? Tommy, can you hear me?” She slapped his cheeks gently, trying to bring him round. “What’s the MATTER WITH YOU!?”

“Hey!” Autumn said sharply. “He attacked my husband first!”

Kate didn’t look up from Tommy. “Unless your husband had a skull fracture that took him 6 months to recover from, I really don’t give a damn right now.”

“F**k.” Changretta moved towards Tommy. “I didn’t know.”

“I forgot.” Autumn said. “I can’t believe I forgot to tell you that, Luca.”

“We were on our honeymoon, amore. Whatever injuries happened to your brother were extremely low on our subjects to discuss.”

“If you pick up the phone,” Kate said. “Tommy employs the operator. Tell her there’s been an accident and to send Tommy’s doctor out at once.” Luca pulled a small bottle from his pocket. He uncapped it and held it under Thomas’s nose. Kate grabbed his wrist. “What is that?”

“Smelling salts.” he explained. “Autumn is pregnant, and once in a while, she gets light-headed.”

Ok, that explained Mr. Changretta’s overreaction to Tommy’s punch. He was becoming a father now. She didn’t know what happened in here, but Tommy clearly hit first, and Luca defended himself. She exhaled and let him go. “Alright.”

Luca shook his head as he smirked. “It’s really cute the way the two of you pretend not to care about each other.”

“We don’t,” she said. Luca waved the smelling salts under Tommy’s nose. On cue, Tommy’s nose began to wrinkle, and he coughed and sputtered.

“Your actions say differently.” Luca said as he studied her with green eyes that were as invasive as Tommy’s blue eyes.

“Get that the f**k away from me.” Tommy shoved Changretta’s smelling salts away from him. He exhaled deeply, and Kate leaned forward, trying to see his eyes. He frowned. “What the f**k are you doing, Kate?”

“Seeing if you have a concussion.”

“I’m fine.”

“Shut up.”

Autumn hung up the phone and said. “The doctor will be here in fifteen minutes.”

“No.” Thomas shook his head. “No doctors.”

“Yes, doctors.” Kate snapped back at him. “And you will shut up and let the doctor do the exam! I don’t care if I have to hold you down for the exam,” Thomas glowered at her. “But you will f**king do it! Do you hear me?”

He studied her a long time before speaking. “I’m going to get you, Kate.”

“Whatever. The doctor has to clear you.”

He stared her down and then said. “I’m going to sit up.”

“No!” She said firmly. Thomas ignored her and sat up, exhaling deeply. “You are the most frustrating man I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet!”

“Since you brought it up,” Luca cleared his throat. “Mr. Shelby, during our discussion, brought up that you owe him a debt.” Kate froze. Thomas had told Mr. Changretta that she was his whore!? The blood drained out of her face. “I’m aware that you owe him 8,500 pounds. If you’d permit me, I’d like to pay that off.” She stared at him in shock. He was… offering to free her from Thomas’s bed? “As a gesture of goodwill.”

Autumn frowned. “Why does she owe you money, Tommy?”

“A business arrangement, my love.” Luca said smoothly, clearly trying to spare her the embarrassment that Thomas didn’t. “He was paying off some money she owed, and he did her a favor.”

Kate inhaled as she asked him. “And what favor would I be expected to pay off if I were in your debt?”

Luca shook his head. “I’d forgive it. It’s such a small sum.”

She exhaled as she said. “Forgive me, Mr. Changretta, it’s not such a small sum.”

“You’ve been working for him for a while, so have you paid any of it back?”

She inhaled as she thought back. She owed him 132 more. She was almost done with him. “5,940 pounds left.”

Luca nodded. “I can pay you the 6,000, and then you’d be free from that additional job.”

God, it was tempting. It was so f**king tempting. She wanted to be free, and she wanted to get out of this house. But she’d made an agreement with Thomas, and she was honor-bound to see it through. Also, she couldn’t just take the money. She’d have to leave once Thomas had been paid back, and she had nowhere to go. She wouldn’t have as much money in her wallet as she would if she stayed with him. Thomas was giving her a Christmas bonus, and she needed that money. If she took Changretta’s offer, she’d have nothing but 40 pounds. Thomas had promised her over 1,000 pounds at the end of the deal.

She inhaled as she said. “I’m sorry, I do thank you for the offer, but it’s my debt to pay back. I made the deal with him, and I’ll have him paid back in 8 weeks. But, I do thank you.” She held his gaze. “If I weren’t honor bound and if he hadn’t offered me free room and board, paid for my sister’s schooling, and given me additional employment so I wouldn’t leave here empty-handed. I would have definitely considered your offer.”

Luca nodded, understanding in his eyes. “Ok. I just wanted to make sure that you are being taken care of.”

She nods. “I am.”

He nods. “Ok.” He turns to Thomas, who was trying to get to his knees. “Let’s get you in a f**king chair.”

“I don’t need your f**king help.” Thomas groused as Luca pulled him to his feet. He exhaled as Luca seated him in the nearest chair.

Kate knelt and checked Thomas’s pulse as she asked Autumn. “Can you ring Frances, please?”

“I already did.”

Frances appeared at that moment. “Yes? How may I help?”

Kate exhaled. “Tommy started a fight with Mr. Changretta, and Mr. Changretta finished it.”

“I did not---

“Who hit whom first?” Kate inquired. When Tommy didn’t answer, she knew Luca was telling the truth. “The doctor is coming, but I need a bag of ice for his head. Could you bring one, please?”

“Of course, and I’ll keep the children away.”

“Thank you.” As Frances walked away, Kate muttered. “You idiot. Can’t behave for one minute. What was the fight even about?”

Thomas didn’t answer, but Luca did. “It was a matter of the heart. That causes things to get emotional.”

“Shut the f**k up Changretta.”

“Stand up and make me.”

Thomas tried, and she snapped. “Sit down!”

Autumn exhaled as she said. “Come on, my love, let’s leave them to rest. We do want Tommy and Kate at the party this Wednesday.”

“If we f**king come,” Thomas snapped.

Luca shot him a look. “Surely, you wouldn’t deprive Kate of the opportunity to wear such a beautiful dress. We do not have to speak to each other, but it would be nice if the feelings of the women whose company we’d be enjoying that evening could be respected.” Thomas looked at her, and she took that opportunity to check his eyes. They seemed equal, but what did she know? She wasn’t a doctor. “She is taking care of you. Might be nice if you let Cinderella have one night of dancing.”

Thomas rolled his eyes and leaned his head back. “Fine. We’ll be there.”

“Grazie. And Tommy, a word of advice.” Luca said. ““Ove è come una colomba; è bello quando il suo lì, ma può volare via quando tu non vuoi che.”

“Stop with the f**king Italian.”

“Love is like a dove; it’s beautiful when it’s there, but it can fly away when you don’t want it to.” he warned him. “Be careful.”

She frowned. “What does that mean?”

He shrugged. “No idea.”

“We were discussing proverbs from Italy. In fact, I have one for you, Miss Carter.”

“I don’t mind hearing the Italian.” she said. “You speak it beautifully.”

“Grazie. L’amore non è bello se non è litigarello.” he said with a tip of his hat. “Love is not beautiful if it does not include arguments.” Ok, was he among the group that thought she and Thomas were in love? God, she hoped not. However, that would explain why he offered to pay her off. That way she wasn’t beholden to Thomas anymore. That would be nice, but it wasn’t a great financial move. She had Rosemary to think about, and Luca’s offer didn’t include a big bonus at the end of it.

“Well,” Thomas groused. “you and Autumn will fall out of love quick then. She never argues.”

Luca and Autumn started laughing at that. “Oh god, no!” Autumn was proclaimed. “We fight on occasion, Thomas!”

“It’s good to fight.” Luca said as he wrapped his arm around Autumn’s waist. “It warms the blood. It’s even better to make up.”

“Yeah, yeah. F**k off you two. You’re making me sick,” Thomas said.

Kate frowned. “You could have a concussion if you’re feeling nauseous.”

“Kate,” he exhaled. “stop worrying for five f**king minutes.”

“Then stop getting injured.” she stated as Frances approached with the bag of ice. She set it near the lump on his head. He hissed. “The doctor’s coming.”

“I don’t care.” He grabbed the bag of ice and put it directly on the lump. “Frances, have the operator call Charlie’s yard. Tell him to send over some of the yellow stuff and black powder. He’ll know what it is.”

“Yes, Mr. Shelby.”

Thomas exhaled deeply, and she placed her hand on his knee, letting him know that she was there. “You don’t have to hover over me, Kate.”

“I’m not.” She said. “I’m staying nearby in case you need help. When the doctor clears you, then I’ll give you some space. But for now, you have to put up with me, or I’ll really give you a f**king headache.” He let out a dry chuckle at that. She inhaled before asking cautiously. “Why were you guys talking about love, and how could that start a fight?”

“He was talking. “I was listening,” he said simply. “I got tired of listening to him f**king talk.”

She shook her head. “You’re an arse.” After a moment, she said. “I don’t have to go to the farewell party---

“You’re going.” he stated firmly.

“If it’s going to cause trouble---

“No.” he exhaled. “If you don’t go, then I’m just going to break his f**king nose again. Need you there to make sure it doesn’t happen.”

She couldn’t help but smile at those words. “Alright. Then I’ll come, Mr. Shelby.”

“Right.” he closed his eyes as he said. “Wear the second dress. The first one is better for a theatre or something like that.”

“Alright.” she studied him a moment and said. “Don’t fall asleep.”

“Just resting my eyes a moment because my head is killing me.”

“Keep your eyes open.” He ignored her. She risked a glance at Frances, who had her back to her. Kate took that moment to grab him through his trousers. His eyes flew open, and he looked at her. “What the f**k---

“Stay awake.” she said firmly. “Keep those eyes open.”

He stared at her with those blazing blue eyes of his as he said. “You’ll pay for that.”

She smiled, a smile that always drove him mad. “Not tonight. You’re grounded. Something tells me…you’re grounded for the next few days.”

He shook his head as he snapped. “F**k you.”

She laughed before whispering in his ear. “Too bad you’re not up to the task.”

He glowered at her as he grabbed her throat. “You little witch.”

“Bastard.” she breathed softly.

He shook his head as his thumb caressed her throat gently. She hated to admit it, but she liked it when he did that. Thomas was a dangerous man, no mistaking that. However, his grip was always so gentle when he handled her throat. A dangerous position to be sure of. He could very easily choke the life out of her if he chose to, but he didn’t. Strange how their friendship always had a bit of a dark edge to it. But even stranger…when did their relationship become friendly? And who said they had a relationship even in the first place?

Chapter 34: Salvatore

February 24th, 1926,

---

“Stop fidgeting.” Thomas said as he glanced at Kate. She had on a black coat that left her fully covered, but she wouldn’t stop fidgeting.

“I can’t help it.” She hissed. “I feel naked.”

“If you want,” he said. “I can rip the dress off you in the middle of the floor, and then you’ll remember what it feels like to be actually naked.”

She shot him a look. “Really, Thomas?” He just shrugged, and she shook her head. “You’re terrible.”

“You’re the one laughing.”

“I am not laughing!” She stated as she bit her lower lip.

“Say that without biting your lip.”

She ignored him and looked out the window, her hand discreetly covering her lips, which were covered in red lipstick. Since Changretta had managed to give him a mild concussion, Kate had gotten two evenings off. That had surprisingly been fine. She’d stayed with him in his bed, and her being there had been enough. He hated sleeping alone. When she was in the bed with him, he didn’t need to take the pills or anything to sleep. He just slept.

Today, they’d been too busy packing for tonight to even think about having sex with each other. He’d taken Kate to his small but private house in London. He figured Changretta must have spies because no sooner did he get Kate up into the room than Autumn showed up. She dragged Kate out shopping, and he didn’t see either of the women until 4:30 that evening. Kate came back with bags of makeup and a few other things. She’d also gotten her hair done up, and it looked very pretty. It was brushed off to one side and twisted up with pins and curls. So, taking her to bed was out of the question until they returned home. She’d gotten her fingernails and toenails painted as well. Blood red, he observed. The party started at 6:00, so Kate had gone upstairs to take a bath, and he could hear her doing all kinds of things in the bathroom. When he’d gone up around 5:00, Kate was out of the bath and in a robe. She was sitting at his desk, where she’d put a little mirror so she could do her makeup. He’d bathed and found her with her makeup done and finally getting dressed around 5:30. A quick glance at the gown showed that once again, Kate had no jewelry.

So, he called his jeweler, who hurried round with a bunch of necklaces. He picked a simple one because Kate wasn’t likely to wear anything that was outrageous. As she mentioned before, she liked things simple. So, he’d gone with something that wouldn’t clash with her dress. She came down, swaddled in that coat, and announced that she was ready. She…looked stunning just like that. She was always very beautiful, but he barely recognized her. The sight of her nearly took him to his knees. His jeweler spoke up and mentioned the necklace. As expected, Kate had protested about the jewelry, but his jeweler managed to get the diamond necklace around Kate’s throat before he even got to see what she looked like under that cloak! So, if she felt naked, both of them were in for a very interesting evening.

They pulled up in front of Luca Changretta's hideous white mansion, and he exhaled. “It’ll be alright.” Kate said softly. “It’s just a few hours, and then we can go.”

“Yeah.” He got out of the car and went around to see Kate halfway out. He offered her his hand, and she looked surprised for a moment, but she took his hand. He tried not to notice how her hand felt right in his, but this was all a figment of his imagination. It was a combination of Changretta and Polly f**king with his head. However, that excuse was starting to sound thin in his head.

They entered, and he reached for her coat. She smiled at him over her shoulder. “Thank you.”

He removed the cloak…and went still at the sight of so much skin. He did NOT remember the back being this open. He’d asked her to go with this one because while it appeared to be form-fitting, he thought it was the more modest of the two dresses. The other one had a low neckline. This dress had a low neckline, and the necklace he’d bought for her rested perfectly just above the swell of her breasts. But the back, it was low. It was so f**king low and open that she couldn’t be wearing a stitch underneath. Strange, because he’d seen her naked many times. He’d held every inch of her in his arms and heard her cry out as she came underneath him, but this, it was a different side to her. She turned towards him, looking every inch like the lady from Oxford that she was. However, this was the first time his brain registered that she was a woman. Not just a body, but a woman, and a beautiful one at that.

“Thomas!” Kate said, and he looked to find her standing there uncomfortably. “Is something wrong?”

“Hmm?” That’s when he realized that he must have been staring at her. He shook his head as he handed their overcoats to the butler or whoever was standing there. “You look beautiful.”

He didn’t mean to say that, but the words just popped out. Kate, however, looked confused. “Are you drunk already?”

Now, he was insulted. “No.”

“Well, you must be!” She shook her head as he approached her. “We both know what I am. I’m too old to be considered anything other than somewhat attractive.”

“Hey,” he gripped her chin and made her look at him. “you’re beautiful, Kate.”

She rolled her eyes and snorted. “Since when?”

He couldn’t answer that question. He didn’t want to answer that question. Because if he were honest, he’d say that he thought that she was beautiful the first moment that he saw her. He’d just never told her things like that. He’d kept all those little thoughts private.

“There you are!” Autumn’s voice caused him and Kate to turn away. Autumn was a short distance away, hanging on Changretta’s arm and waving. Autumn was a foot shorter than Changretta, so they always looked unevenly matched. However, the height difference did make them look cute. “Come here, Tommy, and bring Kate!”

He exhaled as he took Kate’s arm and walked her over to where Autumn, Luca, Polly, Michael, Arthur, and Linda stood. Changretta gave him a courteous nod, which he returned. He wasn’t going to fight, but he was still angry that Changretta had managed to knock him out with one hit. The worst part was Changretta had hit him while his back was turned. However, he had broken John’s arm in three places. He was lucky that he got away with a mild concussion.

Autumn looked lovely. She wore a plain, deep blue velvet dress with a low back. He didn’t understand how it passed as formal until he saw a two-stranded sapphire and diamond necklace. Changretta was rich, disgustingly rich, and Autumn, even though she’d married for love, had hit the jackpot with him.

“I was so worried that you wouldn’t show up!” Autumn said merrily. She’d turned into this bubbly, energetic person since she’d married Luca. He almost found himself wishing for the days when she stammered and kept quiet.

“Well, it was your going-away party.” He hugged her with one arm. “So, here we are.”

“Yes.” After the hug, Autumn turned to Kate. “And you look just as stunning as I thought you’d be. I got the size right too!”

Kate nodded, her cheeks flushing red. “You have a good idea. The dress is lovely.”

“Pardon me.” Luca stepped forward and took her arm. Every hair on Thomas's body stood up as Luca took Kate away from him. “Katherina, come with me. I have a gentleman I wish you to meet.”

“Excuse me?” He asked indignantly. He’d come with Kate; she was on his arm. What the hell was Changretta doing?

Even Kate looked confused. “But---

“Salvatore Ferragamo.” He said. “He’s a shoe designer. Very wealthy. I wouldn’t be so bold as to assume to know your age, but he’s near 30. He’s spent 13 years in Hollywood making shoes for celebrities. He’s here alone, and Autumn and I arranged for him to be your dinner companion this evening. So, follow me.”

Thomas’s head nearly exploded as Luca led Kate away! “You f**king what---

“Don’t worry, Thomas.” Autumn said as Luca whisked Kate away. “We didn’t want you to be alone, so we invited Lizzie.”

He glowered at her. “You what?”

“Lizzie.” Autumn frowned. “Why? Is there something wrong? After the mix-up between you and Kate, I felt it was better not to place the two of you together. And since you and Lizzie were friends---

“Yeah, yeah. It’s fine.” It was not fine. He was angry, and his hand was shaking. He exhaled as he reached into his pocket for a cigarette. “I need a smoke.”

“Ok, outside please.” He stared at her in shock.

“What?”

“Luca and I don’t allow smoking in the house.” She said simply. “It’s one of our rules.”

He stared at her. “What the f**k is wrong with the two of you?”

“It’s a nasty habit, and I’m pregnant.” She said as she put her hand on her stomach. “I don’t think it’s good for the baby.”

Had Changretta f**ked what little sense Autumn possessed out of her head when he put that baby in her?! “The baby,” he bit out. “ain’t breathing this sh*t in---

“Tom,” Polly said firmly. “find better words, and don’t spoil Autumn and Luca’s farewell party. The two of them are leaving, so just abide by their rules for one night. This is their home, not yours.”

He exhaled and shook his head. “What the hell, eh?” He turned and walked out of the entry. He walked through to the ballroom, and as he passed through the crowd, he spotted Luca talking with Kate and this Salvatore Ferragamo. He’d never heard of the man before, so he was possibly straight, not involved in any kind of crime. However, Luca had more than one male admirer around her. There were two other young men who were boldly admiring Kate, especially with that open back of hers. Luca waved them over, and he introduced Kate to them. She smiled, shook their hands, and laughed at one of their jokes.

He turned and walked outside, angrily lighting a cigarette. He was angry; he was f**king angry. “Tommy?” He turned to see Lizzie standing there on the other side of the terrace, also smoking. She crossed her arms and approached him, a calculatingly sultry look on her face. “It’s been a while.”

---

Kate's necklace

---

---

Autumn's dress and necklace

---

 

---

Author’s note: Salvatore Ferragamo was one of the most famous shoe designers of his time. Celebrities would come from all over the world to get shoes made by him. Eva Peron and Marilyn Monroe would buy shoes made from him. At one point in his life, he and his workers would be making over 300 shoes a day, he was that highly sought after. He is also the man responsible for designing a pair of shoes that would then become the most famous shoes in the world. Judy Garland’s red shoes from ‘Wizard of Oz’.

Chapter 35: Dining and dancing

He hadn’t seen her outside the office in so long that it was strange to see her in a formal dress. From the style, he knew that it was something that she couldn’t afford. So, that meant Autumn had bought it for Lizzie. However, he could tell that she hadn’t brought it from Italy. So, just a formal dress from England for Lizzie, while Kate got two dresses from Italy. From the way Ada and Polly were dressed, Autumn had brought them gowns from Italy as well. Lizzie’s was black with pink flowers, which gave the illusion of her being dead somehow.

He nodded at her. “Lizzie.” She exhaled and approached him. “What are you doing here?”

“Getting some air.” she stated. “And you?”

“Same.” He turned and looked up at the sky before blowing some smoke in the air. It was a strange night; it was so still and quiet. For a moment, he and Lizzie stood there in peace, calmly smoking their cigarettes. He knew she’d be the first to speak.

“Come alone?”

He shook his head. “No.” He wasn’t much of a talker, and in this moment, he found himself missing Kate standing by. The conversations with her were never awkward. She always opened that mouth of hers, and everything under the sun came out. She was direct, and while he’d initially found it annoying, it was now refreshing. Even if Kate wasn’t talking to him, she’d have rested her head on his shoulder and not said a word. Even her silence could be companionable. Why the hell was he even thinking about Kate right now!?

Lizzie put out the cigarette and moved towards the glass doors. He exhaled as he walked towards the glass door. She inhaled as she asked. “Her?”

He looked in the window to where Kate was still surrounded by men. The group had grown from three to five. She was handling the conversation with them very easily. She was a lady. “Yeah. Kate.”

“So that’s her name then.” Lizzie said quietly, a tinge of jealousy in her voice. “I’ve seen you with her. I was wondering what you were doing with her.”

He exhaled as he said. “Just business, Lizzie,” he lied as he watched Kate. One of the men kissed her hand before hurrying off to get her something to drink. “Just business.”

“Business? I’m not a fool, Tommy.” Lizzie shook her head as she said bitterly. “I know her type. Don’t worry, Tommy. She’ll pick four men to bring up to her room tonight.” The cigarette fell from his hand. “Just make sure you have a rubber when you f**k her, because those men are gonna run her through.”

Thomas lost his mind. His sanity had been hanging on by a thread, and it finally snapped. He grabbed Lizzie by the throat and slammed her up against the vines climbing up the side of the house. Lizzie let out a gasp as she grabbed his arm. He exhaled as he let Lizzie know that she’d crossed the line. He’d rarely put his hands on a woman like this. The first woman he actually recalled grabbing like this was Tatiana. She’d accused him of not loving Grace. Lizzie had accused Kate of being a whore. While he himself had called her that, it had been to make her submit. Then later, it became an excuse he’d use to tell his family. He’d say it to himself in his head to remind him not to let his feelings grow out of check.

But to hear Lizzie Stark… Lizzie Stark of all people call Kate a whore and insinuate that she’d take four men to her room. It filled him with unfathomable rage. He couldn’t stand to hear it. Lizzie was a whore. The very definition of a whore. God alone knew how many men Lizzie had f**ked including Angelo Changretta. Kate had only been with John Carter before him. There’d been the one man who threatened her with a knife and forced her against her will. He unconsciously tightened his grip on Lizzie’s throat, remembering that. She let out a slight choking sound, which he ignored. He was the only man that she’d ever been with, and she couldn’t get any more innocent than she was. Even with him between her legs nightly, she still stayed innocent and pure. She never lost that light in her eyes that Lizzie had lost so long ago. Kate was untouchable, and he knew that.

“Tom-my.” Lizzie gasped as she grabbed his arm.

“Do you know how many men she’s been with?” He asked Lizzie. She could only shake her head. “Her fiancé. She was engaged. It happened right before he shipped off to the war and then died. For 10 years…she didn’t let another man touch her until me.” He shook his head as he said. “And by some f**king stroke of luck, she wound up in my bed that night instead of somewhere else.” He held her gaze as her brown eyes watered. “She’s with me because she needed to protect her younger sister, and unlike you, she is getting out once she pays back what she owes me. She’s a good woman. There hasn’t been a day in your life where you haven’t been a whore. You’re still a whore now, and you’re f**king pissed to see everyone treat her like a lady.”

“P-please.” She gasped, and he realized that her face was turning red. He let go of her throat, and Lizzie started coughing violently.

He inhaled as he added. “I bet…it must drive you mad that I prefer to be with her over you. Even though she has no clue what she’s f**king doing…she’s still better than you’ll ever be.” She looked up at him, clutching her throat. “Some girl, who’d never been touched more than twice before I got my hands on her, is better than you.”

And with that, he went inside.

There she was, sitting on the arm of a chair and surrounded by a bunch of men. One of the men, presumably that designer, Salvatore or whatever the f**k his name was, had her shoe off. The room started to grow smaller, hotter, and redder at the sight of the man who had ahold of her ankle! One of the men was holding onto her wrist, and her other hand was holding her skirt up just enough for Salvatore to hold her foot. The fact that someone other than him was touching her, and he wanted to kill that man.

Then the changretta’s came in and announced that dinner was ready. Everyone filed into the large dining room and found their places. He should have known that Changretta had him and Lizzie. While the Shelbys were dispersed all throughout the table, he and Lizzie were seated at the far end. Kate sat near the head of the table, surrounded by four men, including Salvatore. All of them were fawning over her, and it made him sick. He had no appetite for the huge course of food that Luca and Autumn had planned out.

Changretta had explained that it was a traditional Italian meal, so there’d be an assortment of dishes. The first course was a light wine and assorted cheese, nuts, and olives. The second course was something called bruschetta, which wasn’t too bad. The third was a mushroom risotto. Then there was some marinated steak with salad and stuffed tomatoes. Then finally, there's a f**king dessert called panna cotta. Dinner was silent and awkward for him. He didn’t engage with anyone, and Lizzie didn’t talk to him either. She kept rubbing her throat, and while he knew he should care, he didn’t care. If she hadn’t called Kate a whore to his face, he’d have never put a hand on her.

Kate, he kept looking at her. She was enjoying herself, and it angered him. This terrible burn, as if she’d swallowed hot acid, was sitting in his stomach. Kate wasn’t going out of her way to attract attention, but he saw her now. He f**king saw her for the first time, and he knew why all the men were swarming around her. Now being forced to watch them swarm around her, he saw why they were swarming. They’d occasionally lock eyes with each other, but one of her many admirers would pull her attention away. Changretta kept giving him smug looks, which made him want to punch him once again. Didn’t matter if Changretta knocked him out again; it’d be totally worth it.

After dinner, everyone went into the ballroom. Kate was instantly whirled onto the floor before he could get close to her. Changretta was a traditionalist, so all the dances for the first hour were waltzes so people could let their food digest. He was watching her, and each time he tried to approach her, someone f**king bothered him. First it was Arthur, then it was Polly, Ada, and even Autumn! They are always sidetracked by dragging him off to meet someone. But an hour into the dances, he figured out that they were keeping him away from Kate. So, he stayed away from her and watched.

As he watched, his anger grew and boiled over for Changretta. He wanted to kill Changretta. It was as if he’d invited every single Italian male that he knew, and all of them were swarming over Kate. And Kate, she was actually enjoying it! He didn’t know how she was able to talk to five men at once and stay utterly charming. She was constantly on the dance floor. There were never any less than two men hurrying to get her a new glass of water. At one point Kate was fanning herself, and one of the men took the fan from her and began to fan her! That was when she looked at him, and there was another moment between them. She mouthed something to him, so he headed towards her. Damn his family to hell; he’d brought Kate here, and he was going to go to her.

He took several steps towards her when someone grabbed him firmly by the shoulder, and he was tugged back. He turned and saw that it was Luca Changretta who had ahold of him by his shoulder. He glowered at Luca and ordered him. “Get your f**king hands off me, changretta.”

“My house,” he stated firmly. “I’m telling you to stay the f**k away from her.”

“You don’t get to f**king tell me that.” He threatened lowly. “I brought her here---

“And she is not your f**king property, Shelby.” Changretta snarled in his ear. “Right now, she is a guest in my house, and you will leave her be.”

He inhaled as he bit out. “Get your hands off me, Changretta.”

“Look at her.” He didn’t turn his head, and Changretta made him look at her. Once again, Kate was being whirled around on the dance floor by someone who was clearly sweet-talking her because she was blushing like crazy. “Look at her.” Changretta said in a softer voice. “She is a beautiful, charming, and intelligent woman. You can see that she has a lot of love to give. Those men that I introduced her to, they’re good men. Honorable and I made sure that they’re in a position to support her and her sister.” All that Italian food that he’d eaten began working its way up his throat. So, this whole evening had been planned out. The goal was to find Kate a husband. “I hope she can fall in love with one of them because you don’t deserve her, and you f**king know this.”

He was silent a moment. He knew he didn’t deserve her…but he couldn’t stand the thought of her being with anyone but him. “Take your hands off me.” He ordered. “Now.”

“Fine.” Changretta exhaled as he said. “I’m only going to tell you this one last time, Shelby. If you want her, then you go over and get her. You tell her that you love her and you want to marry her. But if you do not intend to take her and give her the best possible life that a woman like her deserve. Then you step back and let one of the other men give her that life! Because she deserved better than to get stuck with you as her husband for the rest of her miserable days when I know that every one of those men would treat her like a f**king queen! So,” Changretta bit out. “You’ve got a f**king choice. You man up and start treating that woman the way that she deserves. Or you man the f**k up and walk away from her. And you give the man who really deserves her love the chance to meet her.”

---

Lizzie's dress

---

Chapter 36: Kate's confusion

She was going to have a f**king panic attack if she couldn’t get some air. She’d been surrounded by rich and famous men all evening, and she wanted some space! She was normally the talker, but she couldn’t get a word in edgewise! God! She was starting to miss Thomas and his silent manner. And where the hell was he!? She’d been looking for him all evening, and she only managed to catch little glimpses of him here and there. Was he mad at her? God, he probably was. This wasn’t her fault! This was something that Luca Changretta had organized, and right now she was bored to tears and completely miserable!

“Now,” Rodrigo said. “if you are available, I should like to take you for a walk in the park tomorrow.”

She opened her mouth only to have Antonio cut her off. “Hold on. I’d like to engage Katherina myself for a walk! We must come up with a schedule to---

“F**k off.” She jumped at the sound of Thomas’s voice. There he was. While he wasn’t a tall man, he radiated energy that not only made him look taller but also seemed dangerous. He looked at all the men as he said. “All of you, take a f**king hike. Go bother someone else.”

She nearly burst into tears at his words. She shouldn’t feel relieved, but she’d been trying to hide the truth from all of these men, who fortunately mostly wanted to talk about themselves, that the tension was killing her. Now, Thomas was telling them to clear off. They all looked confused, which wasn’t surprising to her.

“I beg your pardon.” Salvatore protested. “Mr. Changretta specifically introduced her to me with the expectation----

“You and Changretta can both go f**k yourselves.” he stated without blinking, maintaining eye contact with her as he approached her. “She’s with me.” Never before had those words ever thrilled her to the core, but they did now. She got to her feet, wobbling a little in her heels, and Thomas steadied her. “You alright, sweetheart?”

God. He called her sweetheart in front of them!! She inhaled as she nodded. “Yes.”

He stepped closer, putting an arm around her waist. “Sorry about everything. I couldn’t get away.”

She inhaled deeply as she said. “You’re here now, so… I’ll forgive you.”

“Good.” He leaned forward and dared to press a kiss to the corner of her mouth! After a moment, he turned to the men and said. “I said, f**k off! She’s with me. So no, none of you are taking her anywhere. Like I said, f**k off!”

The men all looked stunned, and they shuffled away from her spot. She exhaled in relief. “Oh, thank God! What kept you?”

He shrugged. “You looked like you were having fun.”

She glowered at him as her blood boiled. “Did I say I was having fun? God, I can’t breathe! I smell like all of them!!” She hissed furiously. “I hate, HATE it when men are all over me like that! I couldn’t get away without being rude. And you!” She shook her head as she said. “You just abandoned me to them!!” She studied him and then asked quietly. “Did I do something wrong again? Because if I did, I’m sorry.”

He was silent a moment, and then he shook his head. “No, you did nothing wrong, sweetheart.” She blinked at the term of endearment. He’d never called her sweetheart before…apart from that one night when she was sleeping with ‘John.’ That was before they’d gotten physical, so it was strange to hear him call her that now. He stepped forward and ran his thumb gently over her lips. “Autumn, Changretta, and the rest of my family…decided that you needed to be saved from me.”

She jolted. “What?”

‘So, they invited all these men, who happen to be single----

The blood drained from her face. “Oh God.”

“and rich enough to support you and your sister.”

She got angry for a moment before asking him directly. “Did you know about this?”

He shook his head. “No. Changretta just told me. So, I came over here.”

“To reclaim your property,” she said tightly. “I know.”

He shook his head as he said. “No.” After a moment of stroking her face, he said. “I came over to ask if you’d like to dance with me.”

Kate dropped her fan at his words. “Me?” He nodded as she stammered. “You want to dance with me?”

“Yes.” he said softly. He inhaled as he asked. “Kate, may I have this dance?”

Something was going on again; something was changing. The way he was looking at her, the way he spoke, something had changed. Kate felt her heart pounding in her and a little flutter in her stomach. She inhaled before nodding. “Yes. Yes, I’d love to dance.”

He smiled as he took her hand and guided her onto the dance floor, his hand in the small of her back. ”Come on.”

As they maneuvered through the crowd, she spotted Luca talking with Aunt Polly. They were both looking at her and Thomas, letting her know that he was indeed telling the truth. They were watching him and trying to keep him away from her. She could imagine that Thomas took all he could before coming to get her, and she was glad he did. His fingers stroked her back, running through the beads of sweat dotting her skin. He frowned and then led her off the dance floor! She was confused, but she followed him as he led her outside to the terrace. She inhaled the night air deeply. “God! How’d you know I needed air?”

“You’re sweating.” he observed.

“I don’t think I got one dance break.” She nodded as she said. “My feet are killing me too. I haven’t danced like that in a while.”

“Hmm.” he studied her a moment and then said. “Take the shoes off.”

She shook her head. “I couldn’t.”

“It’s a painted porch.” he pointed out. “The floor is smooth.”

She exhaled and nodded. “Alright.” she didn’t hesitate to kick off her shoes and she groaned at how nice the cold floor felt under her feet. “Oh. Oh, that feels lovely.” Thomas stepped closer and pulled her into his arms. She frowned for a moment. “What are you doing?”

“You said you’d dance with me. So,” he pulled her into a dancer’s hold. “we’re dancing.”

Ok, something had changed. Suddenly, being out here with him felt wrong. “Out here?”

He nodded. “Yes.”

She inhaled as she whispered. “It’s not proper. Somebody might see us.”

“I don’t care.” he said simply. After a moment of dancing in silence, he asked her. “Does it bother you? People seeing you out here dancing with me?”

She bit her lip. It didn’t really bother her. This kind of intimate action was supposed to be between a couple that was at least engaged. So, it was strange that he’d do something like this. After a moment of searching her soul, she realized that she didn’t mind dancing with him. It was more a matter of why he was dancing like this with her that bothered her. She couldn’t ask him why he’d chosen to dance outside like this with her.

She shook her head as she said softly. “No. It doesn’t bother me.”

He nodded. “Good.”

They didn’t say anything more, and he pulled her closer to him. As a rule, she didn’t like being held this close, especially in an outfit that was so revealing. He had his right hand wrapped around her bare shoulders, and he was gently stroking her back, sending little shivers down her back. She inhaled as he pressed a soft kiss to her shoulder. He felt different right now. Off guard somehow. Her own guard went down as they danced. She felt relaxed in his arms, surer somehow. Possibly even safe. He kept kissing her, and her eyes drifted shut as his lips moved from her shoulder to her neck, her chin, and then her mouth. His kisses stayed soft and gentle; they were not possessive or seeking. They were tender. He rarely kissed her like this. Her arms wound around his neck, and she held onto him.

Thomas moved her out of sight, pressing her against the wall where the ivy vines were, and she knew what he wanted. She inhaled deeply, spreading her legs for him so he could get closer to her. But he didn’t do that. He pulled her upright, closing her legs as he continued kissing her. She was…beyond confused right now. He just kept kissing her, and his hands never left her shoulders or wandered. He just wanted to kiss her, and that realization took her breath away! Why? Why did he just want to kiss her? She let him kiss her as she tried to figure out what was going on, but she couldn’t. Her head was spinning madly, and she could barely breathe. When they broke apart, they were both breathing frantically, and she had her hands in his hair.

He caressed her face gently as he said. “I better get you back inside.” She stared at him as he released her and went to get her shoes! He picked them up and placed them at her feet. “Here you go.”

She stepped into those aching shoes of hers. As he adjusted his coat and hair, she asked him. “When are we going home?”

He studied her with a brow arched. “The night is young; they’re still dancing.”

“I know,” she sighed as she smoothed her skirts.

After a moment he asked her. “Do you want to go home, Kate?”

She bit her lip and admitted it. “I am tired, but it’s your sister’s farewell party, and I don’t---

“Do you want to go home?” He repeated as he caressed her face. She couldn’t help but shiver. She thought she knew everything about this man. Knew every touch, every caress, every mood, and every silent expression that his eyes held. But right now, she wasn’t so sure. “Tell me, Kate.”

He was giving her…a choice? That was new. Thomas normally made demands of her. He was asking her this time. She licked her lips and whispered honestly. “I want to go home.”

“Alright,” he cleared his throat as he said. “I’ll have my driver take you back.”

She frowned. His driver? What was going on with him? “You’re not,” she was confused. “You’re not coming with me?”

He looked at her with those damn blue eyes of his and asked her directly. “Do you want me to come with you?”

God. Why was he doing this to her? Why was he asking permission all of a sudden? It was VERY confusing! She’d grown used to him demanding or ordering, so making requests…it didn’t seem like him. She inhaled, her heart pounding violently in her throat as she whispered. “Yes.”

He leaned forward and placed another gentle kiss on her lips. She let out a whine in the back of her throat, surprising her. She…never reacted to his kisses before. But then, he’d never kissed her like that before. “Come on.” He said gently after ending that kiss. “I’ll take you home now.”

“Thank you.”

Thomas guided her into the house, and several people, mostly the men that Luca had introduced her to, looked at them. Salvatore was talking with Luca, who pointed out that she and Tommy had come in together. Polly and Luca nodded before moving towards her and Thomas, causing him to tighten his grip as he said. “We’re going straight out the door. No looking back.”

“Ok.” She was cold, but she didn’t want to get stopped by his family. Thomas managed to get her past everyone without any confrontation, and he got her into the car. As the car pulled away, she saw Polly, Luca, and even Arthur out on the porch. She exhaled as she leaned back. “Oh God. It was just supposed to be dancing!”

“It’s alright.” he said as he gently caressed her face. “They’ll adjust to the idea that you are mine, Kate.”

She had no answer for that as he drew her close to him. He exhaled as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and let her rest her head on his shoulder. She tried to relax, but her brain was scrambling to understand what was happening right now. The way he’d said that she was his was very different. It wasn’t like he was saying that she was his property. She knew that possessive tone. This one, not so much. It almost sounded caring. And Thomas Shelby didn’t care for anyone. So, why was her mind playing tricks on her and telling her that maybe, just maybe, he actually cared for her?

Chapter 37: A taste of respect

When Kate awoke, she was aware of a warm body pressed against hers, strong arms around her, and lips that were pressing kisses all over her bare shoulder. That was strange. She’d never woken up with Thomas still in bed with her. He was an early riser, and it was now nearly 9:00. So, why is he still in bed with her?

She turned slightly, and her mouth was instantly covered by Thomas's. She felt drugged, and she wondered if she’d been drugged. There was no reason for her to feel this loose and relaxed. Thomas kept kissing her until she was panting against his lips. He then turned her onto her side, and she felt his erection against her hip. She tensed a little. “Thomas?”

“It’s alright, sweetheart,” he said as he spooned closer to her. “I think you’ll like this.”

She inhaled, trusting him for a few moments. He lifted her right leg and brought it up over his hip. She felt exposed like this. Thomas slipped his hand between her legs, and she gasped as he slipped a finger inside her, making sure that she was wet enough for him before sliding deeply into her. He pulled her close, and she let out a moan as he began to thrust languidly into her from behind. One of his hands fondled her breasts, pinching and teasing her nipples. His other stayed between her legs, stroking and pushing against her clit as her brain whirled.

He was acting differently. Last night in the car, he hadn’t tried anything. When they got in the house, she handed him back his coat, and she found his mouth against hers again. She felt as if he was going to drown her in those kisses of his. It was all so very strange. She didn’t know what had gotten into him, but it felt lovely. He felt nice when he was like this, gentle and attentive.

When he pulled away, she asked him. “What’s gotten into you?”

He’d just shaken his head and said softly. “Nothing.”

She hadn’t believed that for a moment. He kissed her, and she asked him. “Are you…going to do it the way I like tonight?”

He’d exhaled against her lips before asking. “Want me to make love to you, Kate?” God, the way that heat enveloped her body. It was almost sinful the way her body reacted to his voice. She could only nod. He inhaled and said softly. “Ask me, Kate.”

She needed a moment to understand, but in the end she said. “Make love to me, Thomas Shelby.” He cupped her face in his hands and kissed her as he drew her into the middle of the room. His hands found the gold snaps, and he undid the back of her dress. She inhaled and caught the front of her gown. “Tommy, someone’s going to see us.”

“They won’t,” he explained as he brought the front of her dress down to reveal her heaving breasts. “I dismissed them for the evening.”

Her stomach began to dance madly. She knew he was up to something; she just didn’t know what it was. She was breathing rapidly as he brought the dress down so she could step out of it. She was now nearly naked, apart from her lace panties. “Thomas---

“Out of these too, Kate.” He used one finger to draw her undergarments down her leg. She inhaled as she stepped out of them. She was in the entry with just some dimly lit oil lamps. She still felt as if someone could walk in at any moment and see them like this. Well, she’d be the one humiliated, as she was stark naked in comparison to Thomas. But dear God, the way he looked at her with those hungry blue eyes made every inch of her shiver.

Thomas had already shrugged out of his coat, and now he knelt to his knees. She gasped and shook her head. “Oh God.” He hadn’t…not since that day in his childhood home! He buried his face between her trembling thighs, and she threw her head back. “God!” He’d never done this before taking her. She knew his habits and his preferences when it came to making love. At least, she thought she did until this moment. Now, she didn’t know who he was! She grabbed hold of his head and held onto him as he pleasured her with his tongue.

When she finally came, he kept teasing her with his tongue before pressing a kiss to her inner thigh. He exhaled before rasping. “I want to hear you, Kate.”

She whispered. “Tommy,” she caught herself. She’d never called him Tommy before. It was always Thomas and Mr. Shelby. “I’m sorry.”

“I want to hear you, Kate.” He said quietly. “Say my name, Kate.”

She inhaled as she whispered his name. “Tommy.” With that, he grabbed her around the waist and took her to the floor.

She gasped at the contrast in the temperatures. Pinned to cold flooring while Thomas's body above her radiated heat. He kissed her before slipping into her, causing her to moan. He was hard. He’d been hard outside when they’d kissed earlier. Now, he was practically ready to burst. Still, he’d kept his actions slow and measured, just the way she liked it. It didn’t take too long for him to bring her to her second climax. She heard why he chose to make love to her in the entryway. There was an echo, and their sounds radiated throughout the house. Her cries, her pleas, his grunts, and his encouraging demands echoed in the room. When he ordered her to come for him, she broke apart as he came inside her. He bit her neck, causing her to gasp and shiver as he lightly marked her neck. She went limp in his arms, certain that she was going to die.

He pressed a kiss there, to the little mark that he’d left on her skin. She whimpered. “You’re mine, Kate. You’re f**king mine.”

“I-I know,” she whispered without thinking as tears ran down her cheeks. “I know.”

He studied her before asking. “Did I hurt you?”

“No.” She inhaled as she whispered. “That was wonderful.”

He kissed her deeply before helping her to her feet. She held onto him as the room spun around her. Thomas picked her up and carried her into his room. He drew a lukewarm bath and set her in the tub before getting in with her. She wasn’t shy about bathing in front of him anymore, but…again, this felt intimate. Especially when he took his cloth and washed her back. She removed all the pins from her hair, glad to be free of them. He kept kissing her neck, touching her, almost as if she meant something to him. It was her imagination running wild, but she was enjoying this side of him. She was enjoying him, so she turned to face him and kissed him on the mouth. Thomas let out a groan as he sank back into the tub, drawing her back with him. He had his arms around her shoulders, gently caressing her.

She was the one who broke the kiss and said. “Take me to bed, Thomas.”

He studied her as he asked. “Are you sure?”

She nodded. What a strange question to ask her! He’d never asked her permission before; he just normally took her! However, this was the one occasion where she did want to be with him. “Yes.”

He sat up. “Alright, sweetheart.” There he was with that sweetheart again. He got out of the tub and helped her out. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, kissing him as he moved into his room. They fell back onto the covers, and Thomas made love to her. He stayed that gentle and soft through the evening, and now, he was just as kind to her this morning.

She gasped lightly as they came together, and he pressed a kiss to her neck, nibbling where he’d bitten her last night. “I’ve got you. I’ve got you, sweetheart.”

She melted against him. She didn’t know what was going on, but she’d take as much of him like this as he was willing to offer her. She turned towards him, her lips catching his jaw. “Thank you.”

“Hmm, you like that?” he murmured before taking another kiss from her mouth. She nodded, causing him to smile devilishly at her. “Maybe I’ll wake you up like that every morning.”

“I wouldn't complain.” she admitted softly.

After a few kisses, he exhaled and said. “We should get up. You must be hungry.”

She had no clue what he was talking about, but she nodded. “Yes. A little.”

He pressed another kiss to her lips. “Good girl.” God, what the hell was he doing to her?! She got out of the bed and moved to her suitcase, looking for the second outfit she packed for today. She could feel Thomas watching her as she got into her stockings, undergarments, and slip, which was another thing that was strange. He never looked at her, not like this, and she was beyond confused as to why he was acting this way. She exhaled as she moved to the desk to brush her hair out. She sat there, with her legs crossed, as she brushed her hair out.

“Kate,” he spoke, prompting her to look at him while he buttoned up his vest, having gotten into his shorts, trousers, and shirt already. “I’m going into Birmingham late Saturday afternoon because I have a meeting and a few other things to do. However… I own a pub down there. The Garrison. There’s singing and dancing on Saturday nights only.” she gasped, dropping the brush as she realized what he was asking her. “If you’d like to come along with me, we can hang out there for a few hours.”

“Oh!” She could barely contain her excitement. “May I??” He nodded at her, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “I’d love to!! Oh, thank you!!” She tackled him, sending him backwards onto the bed. “I’ve been longing to go to a pub for ages!! Do you have a dartboard?”

He laughed before stating. “In the backroom.”

“What do I wear?”

“Whatever you want, sweetheart, you’re going with me.”

“I know, but,” she inhaled. “I don’t want to be overdressed.”

He studied her and said simply. “Buy yourself a green dress. That way I can spot you easily on the floor. Ok?”

She nodded. “Yes, Tommy. I mean, Mr. Shelby.”

He stretched up and caressed her face. “Might as well start calling me Tommy, Kate. We’ve known each other long enough.”

“I know, but,” she inhaled before admitting. “I don’t want to cross a line.”

He chuckled as he sat up, still holding onto her. “Kate, all you do is cross f**king lines. It’s fine. Besides, I call you Kate all the time.”

“Fair point.” she exhaled before nodding. “Alright. I’ll call you Tommy, then.”

He nodded as he stood up, clearing his throat. “I’ll meet you downstairs. “Alright.” He grabbed his coat, and Kate let out an excited squeal as he left the room. She was going out drinking and dancing in a pub! She could not wait.

---

Thomas heard her squeal as he closed the door, and he couldn’t help but smile. She shouldn’t have gotten so excited about such a little thing, but clearly going to a pub was something that she wanted to do for a long time. So, he was more than willing to oblige her in that regard.

He’d have to do this whole thing very carefully. For now, she was with Declan Walsh. Judging by how incompatible Kate and Declan were, wooing her away from him would be a fairly easy task. Now, their sleeping together was a problem. Kate was already getting suspicious that something changed last night; she just wasn’t sure what it was yet. He had to get closer to her and start seeing if there was even a remote possibility that she felt something, anything, for him. It was a long shot, but he was a gambling man. He wasn’t completely sure of his feelings, so moving ahead slowly and feeling her out would give him some time to get his feelings completely in order.

But he was 85% certain that he was falling in love again, and he was going to be better towards her. Treat her with respect and see that she got everything that she deserved. She was a girl with simple tastes but a complex personality. That made them equals mentally. She knew his madness as he understood hers. Hers was much more tamed than his, but it was there. Only she let him see that side of her. He was the only person alive who knew that she’d had a baby and lost it. That was a humbling bit of information. She deserved to be happy, and while he wasn’t sure that he could be happy, he felt like she could make him happy once again. Everything was a huge possibility, and he was willing to try and make it a reality. Judging by how excited she got because of a simple visit to a pub, he could only imagine how excited that she’d be on Saturday when he took her to Charlie’s stockyard and bought her own horse.

Yes. He was going after her, and he already knew exactly how he was going to get to her. To start with, he better go and make sure that someone buys a dartboard to set up in the backroom so it’ll be there for her on Saturday. There was nothing he wouldn't do for her.

Chapter 38: On his desk

February 27th, 1926

---

“Thomas,” Kate protested. “You cannot buy me a horse!”

“Why not?” he inquired as he continued walking down the street.

“Well,” she let out a sigh, and he turned to see she was picking her way around the puddles. He waited for her to catch up to him before nudging her on the boardwalk. He didn’t take her hand because they were in Birmingham. News would travel too quickly that he was caught holding her hand. True, news would spread that he’d been seen with her in the Garrison, but that was his place of business. How he handled her outside his place of business was a different story. “you know that I won’t be able to afford him! Horses are expensive!”

“It’s a good investment, Kate.” he stated as they kept walking towards his office. “Besides, I thought I’d take you for a ride tomorrow.”

“Take me for a,” she stammered. “w-why are you?” She then let out a growl of frustration! “God, you are the most confusing man I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet! I don’t understand you!!”

“Kate,” he stated. “you are the only woman to lose their f**king mind over a horse.”

“It’s not just the horse!” She stated. “It’s the expense!”

He turned towards her, and she crashed into him. She looked at him, those green eyes of hers wide as he asked her quietly. “Did you at least like the horse?”

She stared at him in confusion before nodding. “Yes. It’s a beautiful horse, Thomas. But I can’t----

“We’ll talk about that later. If you move back down to Birmingham, I’ll see to it that Curly takes care of her. So, you don’t have to worry. A horse is much more economic than a car.”

She stared at him as she croaked. “W-why would you say…if I move back to Birmingham?”

F**k. He’d put his foot in it. He cleared his throat as he said. “You could find a job in Warwickshire. Better neighborhood; Rosemary’s already in school with friends, so she’s settled in. You could always leave the horse at my place. No harm either way.”

She stared at him before asking. “What’s happened to you?”

He blinked. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Yes, because you’ve changed,” she said tensely. “I don’t know what happened, but you’re being nice to me. Really nice. Now, you’ve bought me a horse, so pardon me for wondering if you want something in return!”

He shakes his head as he says honestly. “I don’t want anything in return, Kate.”

She inhaled as she said. “You can say that, but I don’t believe you.”

He wasn’t surprised by her statement. He knew he had a long way to go in earning her trust. But it was going to take small steps, some very small steps, before he got her to believe that he had nothing but her best interests at heart. “I know.” He held her gaze as he said. “You will in time.”

She shook her head as asked. “Did Changretta drug or you or have I been drugged? Because there is something going on, and I don’t know what it is.”

“There’s nothing going on Kate.” he said as he turned back to continue walking down the street. “May be feeling a bit more sentimental ‘cause of my sister, but there’s nothing changing.”

“I don’t believe you!” She stated behind him. “But I’m going to find out!”

He nodded as he stuck his hand in his pockets. “You’re welcome to try and figure it out, Kate.”

“I’m going to!” She said loudly. He chuckled internally before opening the door to his office. Kate walked past him and waited. She nodded at him as she said. “It’s a charming office.”

He snorted as he removed his hat. “You’re a f**king liar, Kate.”

She smacked his shoulder. “I am not!”

He exhaled as he said. “I forgot, you like wood. Bricks too, right?”

“Yes.”

He moved towards the office and opened the door. Lizzie was holding a bunch of papers in her hands and a book. She was the last woman that he wanted to see. He exhaled as he said. “Lizzie.”

“Mr. Shelby.” She said tightly. “The end-of-year account book for the Grace Shelby Institute. And a few other papers.”

He nodded. “Right, thank you, Lizzie.”

Lizzie nodded stiffly at him. As she turned to walk out, she started sizing Kate up. Kate nodded at her. “Hello.”

Lizzie studied her and asked. “Aren’t you going out with Declan Walsh?”

His stomach churned at that line of questioning. Kate, however, blinked. “Not quite. I’ve only spent three occasions in his company.”

“Oh,” Lizzie said coldly. “So it’s nothing serious then?”

“Lizzie,” he warned her.

“I really don’t see how that’s any of your business.” Kate said simply. “If you’re concerned about me having any designs on Mr. Shelby,” he turned towards her. “don’t worry. I’m not his type.” God, was she far off.

Lizzie snorted as she said. “Every woman is Tommy’s type. As long as she can breathe and he can f**k them---

“Lizzie!” He said sharply.

“then they’re his type.”

Kate shook her head. “Don’t worry. I’m not staying in town long enough to become a threat to…whatever was going on between the two of you.”

Lizzie opened her mouth and he cut her off. “Lizzie, get out of here or I’ll f**king fire you.” That worked. Her dark eyes widened. “I mean it.” Lizzie turned and walked out of the room quickly, slamming the door behind him.

She exhaled and then asked. “Another woman in your debt?”

God, she was going to have a field day with this. “No. She used to be a prostitute.”

Kate let out a sharp laugh. “You’re kidding, right?”

“No. She used to service my brother John more, though; he wanted to marry her.”

She blinked. “But he met Esme, right?”

“I arranged that.”

She blinked. “What?”

“It’s an arranged marriage, Kate.”

She exhales as she says. “God, do you have no conscience?”

He moved towards his desk. “He needed a wife, and she needed a husband. It brought peace.”

“So, you allowed their marriage because you orchestrated it?” She inquired with one hand on her hip. “But you protested against Autumn and Luca’s solely because of his nationality, even though those two are disgustingly in love with each other?”

“So, you find those two sickening as well?” he inquired.

“Absolutely disgusting.” She said without even blinking. “I told you before, I don’t like fancy talking and all that. However, he likes wooing her, and she likes hearing him compliment her.” She shakes her head before admitting. “However, I wouldn’t deny that they are a happy match. I hope they stay that way.”

“Hmm, one can hope.” He cleared his throat. “If not, then you can always take Changretta in the divorce.”

“No,” she exhaled. “Too old for me, and I have a feeling that my mouth would get in the way of things.” He rolls his eyes. “Look, if you lose your mind with my mouth, I can only imagine how an Italian man would like that.” She turned the account book around on his desk and began eyeing the numbers. “I think…he’d be less lenient to me talking back if you can barely handle it.”

“Yeah.” He moved towards her, wrapping his arms around her waist, relishing how she shivered when he touched her. He kissed her right where he’d marked her before saying,“If you think that talking back turns me off, Kate…you’re wrong.” She went still underneath him for a moment. “That mouth of yours will get you in trouble, but not with me.”

She turned towards him, studying him for a moment before nodding, a faint flush on her face. “Noted, Mr. Shelby.”

He felt deflated. “We’re back to that again, are we?”

“These numbers aren’t adding up.” she stated. “There’s a mistake.”

What the f**k is wrong with this woman? “And?”

“Either you’ve lost a thousand pounds,” he didn’t like the sound of that. “or she forgot to carry the one somewhere.” he leaned over her shoulder to watch her read the books. She gave him a sideways look before saying. “You can continue.”

He frowned. “What?”

“I can concentrate on this while you---

“I wasn’t thinking about that, Kate.” He said honestly. “Until now. But,” he placed his hand on hers. “You’d have to get out of the book.”

She turned and looked at him, a slightly tormented look on her face. “But this is bothering me!”

“Right. So find the math problem, and then we’ll discuss me bending you over my desk or not. Ok?”

She smiled brightly at him. “Thank you. I won’t be long. You can just---

“Kate,” he stated honestly as he ran his hand down her back. “I’d prefer that you concentrate on me and not my books when we’re together.”

She went still as she croaked. “Alright.” All was silent for a minute, and then she spoke in a hesitant voice. “I’m sure you’ve f**ked many a secretary on this desk.”

“Just Lizzie,” he stated. “but I’ve not been with her for a long time. I’ve not been with anyone else but you since Christmas.” She paused at those words. “And I’ve not been with her since September or something.”

She was quiet for a moment before whispering. “That’s good to know.”

“Yes,” he murmured in her ear as he assured her. “You're the only woman I have time for.”

She was silent for a long time, and then she asked him. “Did you ever have her…on your books?”

Oh, he knew that tone of voice. She was curious. However, she did have a thing for books as well, especially things that were math-related. So, it could be a kink of hers. “No. Didn’t even look at Lizzie most of the time when I was with her. But…that sounds like a wish on your part.” He breathed in her ear. “You have to finish the math first.”

She was silent a minute before admitting softly. “I can’t concentrate on it right now.”

He turned around to make her face him. Her face was a rich shade of pink. He exhaled as he said. “Tell me what you want from me, Kate.” She swallowed as he said. “I have no problem giving it to you.”

She licked those full lips of hers before stating. “F**k me on your desk, Thomas Michael Shelby.”

He needed no encouragement, especially when she used his full name like that. God, she knew how to rile him up too easily. He lifted her up on the desk, making sure that she faced him as he took her. She instantly wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist as she sobbed his name. Kate was never a silent woman, and the petty side of him hoped that Lizzie could hear her. However, when Kate got louder, he was fairly certain that she was being loud to make sure that Lizzie knew the same thing. He was off limits for anyone else. He should have known that she was the one for him when he never strayed. He could have when she took that month off to recover, but he didn’t because even without her being in his bed, she still satisfied him in ways that Lizzie couldn’t dream of. He wasn’t dead as long as Kate was around. A smile from her was enough to warm him up.

Chapter 39: Lizzie's lecture

Kate was in trouble. She didn’t know how she was, but she was in big trouble. Thomas kissed her again, and she closed her eyes, trying not to lose herself in the sensation known as Thomas Shelby, but he had a very overpowering presence. And right now, he was coming on strong. He came onto her all the time, but he’d never come onto her before with this kind of intensity, yet gentleness. It was almost scary, the way that she felt when he held and touched her like this.

A knock on the door caused them to separate. “Just a minute!” Thomas said firmly. He then exhaled as he eased out of her. “F**king hell, Kate!”

“What?”

“You’re making my f**king hand shake.” he rasped as he pressed another kiss to her mouth. She could only moan. Frankly, she was grateful that he’d kissed her before she blurted out that her legs were shaking. Somehow, she managed to get her clothes in order after that. He exhaled and closed the book. “Here, take a look at it outside.”

She nodded. “Thank you.”

“I should be thanking you sweetheart.” he said as he placed his hand on her shoulder and guided her out of his office. “You’re the one who caught it.” He opened the door. “When you find the mistake, show Lizzie. Ok?”

She hesitated. “Alright.”

“Mr. Stuart.” He said. “Go right on in.” The man with the briefcase nodded and hurried into Thomas's office. He closed the door. “Lizzie, Kate noticed that a thousand pounds are missing, or you didn’t add something up.” She went stiff. “She’s going to show you, and then you fix it, alright?”

“Is she looking at books, too?” Lizzie demanded, not even bothering to hide her disdain for Kate.

“Yes, Lizzie. Because she’s a f**king genius when it comes to numbers.” His tone dropped darkly as he said. “I’m warning you, Lizzie…I catch you talking about her, and it won’t be nice.”

Lizzie gave him a curt nod before looking back at her book. Kate moved to go sit at the opposite desk while Thomas had his meetings. After a quick scan, she found it. Lizzie had simply forgotten to carry a one. That was it. It was much easier to concentrate when Thomas didn’t have his arms around her and wasn’t kissing her. She inhaled as she walked over to Lizzie and placed the open book on her desk.

Lizzie shot her a look. “What?”

“Here.” She pointed. “You forgot to carry the one. So, you’ll have to make a few adjustments to correct the numbers.”

“Great.” Lizzie said sarcastically.

“You’re welcome.” She shot back.

Lizzie stared at her a long time before speaking. “He must really f**king like you. Never known him to get hung up on one girl for more than a month apart from Grace f**king Shelby.”

“Grace was his wife.” She stated. “So, one would hope that to be true.”

“Near as I can tell,” Lizzie said. “He picked you up around Christmas, and he’s not been with anyone since. So, that’s strange.”

Lizzie was jealous; that was obvious. Kate, however, while not obligated to do so, did want to put her mind at ease that this was a temporary arrangement. “He said that it was cleaner not sleeping around with other people.”

“Cleaner?” Lizzie’s brows went up.

“Yes,” she said. “I owe him money and---

“I don’t give a f**k about that.” Lizzie studied her carefully before laughing faintly. “What? You haven’t been letting him come inside you, have you?” Kate said no answer. Her face said everything, though. “God,” Lizzie said. “don’t you know anything?”

Kate exhaled as she stated. “Unlike you, I wasn’t familiar with this profession until him.”

Lizzie glowered at her and snapped. “God, you’re f**king stupid!”

“I’m not stupid!” She snapped. “I had a miscarriage years ago!” Lizzie blinked. “The doctor said it was unlikely that… I’d ever get pregnant again. So, it’s unlikely that he’d ever be able to get me pregnant.”

“Unlikely” doesn’t mean “never.” Lizzie said tightly. “You should still be prepared.”

“For what?”

“Tommy,” she shakes her head. “it’s a joke that even his seed is territorial. He knocked up his wife, Grace, when she was struggling to get pregnant, on the first shot. When Tommy Shelby decides that he wants to get a woman pregnant, he gets them f**king pregnant.”

She didn’t like the sound of that. “Well, the miscarriage speaks to the fact that I wouldn’t be able to get pregnant.”

“Just in case,” Lizzie opened her desk and pulled out a small envelope. She began writing some instructions on the back. “I’m going to give you these.”

“What are they?”

“Seeds of Queen Anne’s lace.” Lizzie said. “That’ll stop you from getting pregnant.”

That was a surprise to her. “Thank you. That’s kind of you.”

Lizzie studied her. “How are you holding up?”

She exhaled. “I’m alright.”

“If you say so.” She exhales as she says. “Tommy, when he’s stressed, he f**ks and he f**ks hard.” Lizzie handed her the envelope. “Face down…that’s the worst if you’re not used to it. It’s like he’s trying to pound your guts into your lungs.”

Kate bit her lip before admitting. “Tommy doesn’t have me face down.”

Lizzie stared at her. “What?”

“I—I’m always on my back.” She admits. ”Even when I’m on his desk.”

“Why?”

She exhaled before stating. “I told him that I don’t like it like that.”

“He listened to you?” Lizzie blinks, then her eyes narrow. “Does he touch you?”

Kate nods. “Yes.”

“Down there? He touches you?” She nods. “He kiss you as well?”

She swallows as she says. “Sometimes, especially at night.”

Lizzie folded her hands and asked. “He have a pet name for you? Anything at all?”

Kate frowns as she admits. “He calls me sweetheart on occasion, but---

“F**king hell!!” Lizzie snaps as she grabs a bottle of whiskey from her desk and takes a swig. “Again! We’ve got to f**king go through this again!”

She frowned. “I don’t understand. What do you mean, again?”

“Does he buy you gifts too?” Lizzie asks. “Stupid, expensive gifts that don’t make any sense?” Ok, now Kate was starting to get uneasy. “I bet he bought you that diamond necklace you wore at the party.” Lizzie let out a snort. “I bet that’s when it started. Seeing all those other Italian men swarming all over you.”

She frowned. “Excuse me?”

“Tommy’s always been stupid when it comes to love.” Kate’s jaw dropped in shock at those words. “All of us thought he’d never get over Grace! Truth be told, none of us know why he’d even f**king love someone like her!”

“Thomas is not---

“In love with you?” Lizzie shook her head. “God, you’re stupider than she was! He’s obviously in love with you!”

“No!” She shook her head. “No, he’s not!”

“Calls you sweetheart?” Lizzie sneered. “He kisses you, he touches you, and he doesn’t have you face down?” She stood up. “Thomas doesn’t like it when people look at him. If there’s a connection between him and the woman, then he looks at them. Just like when he's in love, he sticks to the woman. He doesn't sleep around and you are the only woman he's been with. All us whores are f**ked face down by him. How do I know? Because they’re friends of mine and we talk. It’s all the same with him. He bends you over something, and then he f**ks you so hard and deep that you think he’s trying to break one of your ribs. He always comes. You never do.” Lizzie frowns and then states. “I bet he lets you come. Am I right? Do you come with him?”

Kate was starting to feel sick. “Every time.”

“Of course he does.” She shakes her head. “I bet he does. He probably holds you afterwards, kisses you, and touches you---

“Stop---

“He’s changed, hasn’t he?” Lizzie demanded. “Since the party, right?” She inhaled sharply as her heart threatened to explode in her chest. “That was the day you stopped being his f**king whore. No wonder he nearly killed me for calling you one. Now, you’re damned to be the next woman that he marries.” Kate began to back up. “He’s probably already loaded you with his bastard, so that way you’re tied to him for the rest of your f**king days!”

Kate just ran.

She didn’t stop to listen; she just turned and ran out of the office. She didn’t know where she was going; she just ran. She needed to get away, and she needed to run. Lizzie’s words echoed in her head, and she didn’t want them to be true. They couldn’t be true! They couldn’t be! She didn’t want them to be! It was impossible for them to be true! They couldn’t be!!

But the longer she thought about it, the more she realized that it was the only thing that made sense. It explained the change in him, the gentleness and the attentiveness. A part of her must have known and felt it, but she hadn’t wanted to believe it! It was impossible! She was his whore! That’s all she was to him! She remembered what he told her on Christmas Day!Right now those words filled her head until they were all she could remember!

No one will ever f**king love you again. No one will ever marry you because no one marries a whore! This is all you’re good for. This is as close to marriage as you’ll ever get, and you know it! No man will ever wait for you at the end of an aisle or put a ring on your hand. You won’t ever wear this dress for anyone. So you might as well pretend for one night that you’re an actual bride and not the whore you are.

“Whoa!” Kate let out a cry as she crashed into someone who held onto her. “Kate? Kate, what is it? Why are you crying?”

Crying? She hadn’t realized that she was crying, but now she did. She wiped her eyes and found herself peering into the concerned face of someone that she hadn’t thought about in a while.

Declan Walsh.

Chapter 40: Whirlwind thoughts

Kate didn’t know what to do. She was having the meltdown that she swore she wouldn’t have. She had her hands over her mouth and was breathing heavily behind them.

Declan frowned as he said. “Alright, let’s sit you down.”

She shook her head. She didn’t want to sit down. She wanted to run. She needed to breathe. God! She needed to be on a f**king horse!! But Thomas f**king Shelby had bought her one!!

“Don’t argue with me.”

She wasn’t arguing. She hadn’t said a word to him. She had her mouth covered because she was going to explode, and Declan did not deserve what was going to come out of her mouth. Declan sat her down on a wooden bench and placed his hand on her back. She instantly smacked his hand off her.

“Whoa!” He said. “Kate? What’s going on?”

She couldn’t answer him. She couldn’t speak right now. She covered her mouth and leaned forward. She tried breathing, but she sounded like an asthmatic! She was hooting and wheezing at the same time! And Declan…yes, she knew that he was trying to help her, but he was too bloody close to her! She jumped up and moved to lean against a railing. It had rained; there was another possibility of rain today, so the air was thick with the scent of rain. She needed to breathe!! She couldn’t get air in her lungs!

A hand on her back caused her to jump. “Stop it!” She spun around and shouted at Declan. “Stop touching me!”

He looked shocked. “Kate, I’m trying to help---

“Then stop touching me!!” She shouted. “Stop touching me for five f**king minutes!!”

His eyes bulged in shock at her swearing at him. She didn’t care. She couldn’t breathe right now! She inhaled and leaned forward over the railing. She needed five minutes alone, and she needed space! She was having a panic attack. She didn’t know what to do! Her mind rapidly began running through all the possible scenarios for her. She could go, pack up, and just leave with Rosemary. But that was a foolish plan. She didn’t have enough money, and Thomas had enough power to track her down and bring her back to him. She could try to track down Luca Changretta and explain the situation, but that still wouldn’t leave her in a good situation. She’d again have no money unless she begged him to bring her and Rosemary to America. Then, she’d need to find a job. But Autumn was Tommy’s sister. Again, he’d bring her back! But then, she was imagining the worst-case scenarios.

Actually, those were the mild scenarios. The worst-case scenario is that Thomas tied her to his bed forever, and no one, not even his family, would lift a finger to stop him. Pregnant? She hadn’t known that his wife had difficulty getting pregnant! She’d assumed because of what the doctor had said that she would never, ever be able to bear children again. Now, she was scared. If she had Tommy’s child growing inside her, he would NEVER, EVER let her go! He’d be the child’s father, and he would undoubtedly get full rights to the child. That led to another situation. Would she be able to give that baby up? Yes, it was Thomas's, but she'd wanted to be a mother so much! She’d been devastated beyond her imaginings when she’d lost John’s baby. But Thomas’s baby… that was a whole different area! This hypothetical baby…she wasn’t sure what it’d be conceived in. Their relationship had taken so many bizarre twists and turns.

Their first time together, she’d reluctantly agreed to share his bed. The following day, it was an arrangement, a means for survival. She’d never really thought about it as being something consensual or not. It was just something that she had to do and agreed to do. There were dark and questionable times, like with her mother’s wedding dress or when he’d used her throat. But he hadn’t been inside her, so a baby hadn’t been made. But, these last few weeks, the sex had changed, and she hadn’t realized it until now. It had varied at first, casual and a means of relaxation or closeness. Possessive and territorial on Sundays. But now, since the party, as Lizzie had pointed out, it had changed again. It had become something that she’d actually started to look forward to, and she hadn’t realized it. Because he’d changed in his feelings towards her, the way he treated her was different. He was gentle with her, loving, attentive, passionate, and everything that she would have wanted to share with a man.

The problem was him.

He was the problem. Thomas Shelby was a cold, cruel, and broken man. She knew this from the moment she laid eyes on him. He was a man who put business before everything, even family. He never smiled, rarely laughed, and walked around with a burden on his shoulders and a f**king dare constantly on his face. A dare that demanded anyone in the world challenge him or threaten him. He relished the challenges. He looked for pain instead of taking a moment to relax and enjoy the beauty of the world around him. But then, he’d been in the wars for so long she knew that there was a distinct possibility that he saw very little beauty around him.

Until her.

And that bothered her. Why her? She couldn’t understand why he’d give her a second glance. They fought! They fought a lot! She’d pulled a gun on him twice!! He’d shouted at her, humiliated her, and God, the way he treated her in the beginning! That wasn’t something to be forgotten so easily! The way he’d ignore her discomfort because it made him feel big. The way he used to call her his little whore and tell everyone who’d listen exactly why she was little more than the scum of the earth. He knew how to find a person’s weakness and hurt them.

But he also knew how to hold on. She remembered the moment when she told him that she’d lost John’s baby. She remembered him holding her, breathing softly and gently to her in Romani, and consoling her. He’d opened up that night and showed her just how vulnerable he was. They both saw each other's vulnerabilities that night. He’d allowed Declan to take her out, despite the fact that he HATED the idea. She could see in his eyes that the thought of killing Declan had crossed his mind multiple times. Still, he’d allowed it, despite his jealousy. Jealousy. She’d thought he was incapable of being jealous, but she was wrong. He was the kind of man who got jealous. Her mother’s wedding dress…his responsibility ended the moment he got the stains out. He did not need to pay to have it restored. He chose to restore it because he was trying to apologize to her without saying the words. Then the diamond necklace, the horse, the kisses, and the way he called her sweetheart. He was capable of tenderness and love. She saw that every time he looked at Charlie.

She just wasn’t sure if it was possible for her to give him what he needed. She wasn’t sure what she even felt when she looked at him! She didn’t think of him as anything more than…Thomas Shelby. There was no other way to describe him. He was Thomas Shelby. Loving him was like loving a storm. While she did love dark, moody, and stormy weather, this…it was something totally different. Loving him…she wouldn’t, and she couldn’t. But then, she started remembering how she’d started responding to him. She’d started coming to him, and he wasn’t just grabbing her the way he used to. He was asking her permission and treating her with as much respect as a man like him could give.

Right now, she wasn’t sure. She wasn’t sure about anything.

There was a sound. The sound of someone getting hit, and she looked up to see a man lowering his hand from a cowering woman.

He’d hit her.

Kate’s thoughts went temporarily on hold as she watched the scene. She couldn’t hear what they were saying, as they were across the street. The woman was trying to calm him down, but he was drunk.

“Kate?” Declan said. “What is it?”

The man grabbed the woman by the throat. Kate moved fast. She ran towards the scene, pulling her gun from her purse. She could hear Declan behind her, but she didn’t care. “Hey!” She shouted, and the man turned towards her. His eyes widened as she pointed the gun in his face!! “Get your hands off her, now!!”

Suddenly, her gun was wrenched from her hands!!

She let out a shout and spun around to see that Declan had her gun!

“Mr. Connors,” Declan said as he tucked her gun away from her. “don’t do that in the street.”

“She’s my wife!”

“I know,” Declan said. “Some things are upsetting to be seen in public.”

“Upsetting!?” Kate shouted as she tried reaching for her gun. “He was beating her---

“Kate,” Declan grabbed her arm and moved her away from the two of them. “stop it. I don’t know what’s going on---

“He’s hurting her!” She shouted. “You can’t just stand there and allow it!!”

“Kate!” Declan grabbed hold of her shoulders as he stated. “This isn’t Oxford. This is Birmingham. Things are handled differently down here. Arguments between husband and wife will sometimes be seen in public.”

“Arguments!?!” She shouted at him. “He was assaulting her!! You’re a blinder! Do something!”

Declan exhaled as he said. “That’s not what Mr. Shelley pays us---

“Then call the police!” She demanded. “Call them!”

Declan was silent a moment before he said. “Kate, it’s legal.”

She blinked. “What?”

“The police won’t do anything, and she can’t press charges, as she can’t testify against her husband. So, it’s best to leave it alone. If anything, your actions today put her in even more danger tonight.”

She stared at him. “My actions??”

“Yes!” He stated. “You can’t do things like that! I don’t know what’s going on with you, but if she’s walking around town with a broken jaw tomorrow, that’s your fault because you couldn’t leave well enough alone! So, what’s gotten into you?” he demanded. “What’s wrong?”

She couldn’t answer that. She looked over his shoulder as Mr. Connors shoved his wife down the street. Declan wouldn’t help. But there was one man who could help, and as much as she hated to admit it, he’d actually do something about this situation.

She had to go talk to Thomas.

Chapter 41: Down by the canal

A woman came out of the office. She didn’t care.

The car was out front. That meant that he was still there. That’s all that mattered.

“Kate,” Declan grabbed her arm, and she pulled free as she stormed into Thomas's office. Lizzie stared at them, watching as they entered the waiting room. The office door was shut, so he had to be in there. “Kate! You can’t go disturbing---

“Is he in there?” She demanded, ignoring him completely and focusing on Lizzie. “Is Thomas in there?”

Lizzie just looked at her as if she were more interested in this display between her and Declan. “Kate,” Declan spun her around and hissed. “you need to calm down!”

“Stop telling me to calm down!” She shouted at Declan.

“This is my job!” He hissed back. “You’re upset. You need to calm down!”

“I just said to STOP telling me to calm the f**k down!” She shouted as the door behind her opened. “I won’t be calmed! I am f**king angry!! I am not some pet that you can tame and cage! I have emotions, and there’s a fire in me that will explode if I cannot speak my mind!”

“You’re overreacting.” Declan stated. “It was nothing---

“OVERREACTING!?” She shouted at him. “He was hurting her!! You just stood there!”

“He’s her husband!” He said. “I’m sorry, Kate, I could not interfere.”

“You couldn’t,” her voice cracked as she slammed her purse down on Lizzie's desk. “you could! You just chose not to! You pathetic, mewling little----

“Right,” Thomas said from behind her as he grabbed her arm. “Come on. Let’s go.”

That made her furious, and she shouted at him. “Get your hands off me!”

“Shut up.” He stated. “Let’s go for a walk.”

“I don’t want to go for a walk!”

“Well, the horse is on its way to the stables, so, yes, you do want to go for a walk.” How did he… she’d wanted… she’d only thought it! How did he know that right now, she wanted to be on a horse? He grabbed his coat and moved towards the door. “And you,” he said to Declan. “just let her say whatever the f**k she needs to say before she explodes. Better that way.”

“Mr. Shelby,” Declan followed after them. “it’s nothing---

“Thing is,” Thomas moved her towards his car and opened the front passenger door. “I know it’s f**king something. Because she doesn’t lose her f**king mind like this over nothing.” He got her in the car and closed the door. He turned towards Declan. “I’ll be back in an hour with her, and you better have your f**king story straight when I get back.” So, he believed her! He didn’t even know what had happened, but he knew that it was something upsetting, and he knew that Declan was making it seem like it was no big deal. He headed around to the front of the car and opened the driver’s side of the door. “Out.”

The driver got out quickly, and Thomas got in. He started the car and took off down the road. He exhaled deeply and focused on the road ahead. After a few minutes of silence, she asked him. “Where are we going?”

“Somewhere I’ve not been in a long time.”

He didn’t say anything more than that. He drove to a deserted part of town, right on the edge of it. There were actually trees here in the middle of all this smoke and all. He parked the car, and she jumped out of her side, not giving him a moment to help her out of the car. He watched her slightly with an arched brow as he pulled on his coat and overcoat. He nodded for her to follow him, and she did. They went down these steps and walked alongside the canal. There were dozens of tunnels, but he stopped in front of the third one. He gestured for her to go on in, and she noted that there were bales of hay in there.

She sat down and watched him. He moved away from her and stood by the canal with his back to her. For a long time there was nothing but the sound of the water moving and the branches of the trees rustling in the wind. After a moment she asked him, “What’s on your mind?”

“We used to come here.” he said quietly, as if he were remembering someone. She stayed silent, waiting for him to talk. “She'd wait for hours for me when I couldn't make it. And I'd wait for her if her family kept her in.”

So, it sounded like that happened when he was a teenager. Lizzie said when he was in love, he stuck to them. She didn’t want to think about that now. She inhaled before asking. “Who was she?”

He was silent a moment before saying quietly. Some girl. Some girl before France.”

So, he was a teenager. After a moment of silence, she asked him. “What happened to her?”

“She died.” She blinked. He just knew one tragedy after another in life. “Consumption.” He turned towards her and moved slowly towards her with one hand in his pocket. “I've not been back here since.” She didn’t like that admission. After a moment he stated. “But I wanted to come here with you.”

He was now so close that their knees were touching. She knew what was coming, but she couldn't stop herself from asking him directly. “Why? So you can f**k her in your head when you’re f**king me?”

“I didn’t bring you here to f**k, Kate.” he said calmly without blinking. He had a tell. She hated how she knew that. When he lied, he blinked. So, that was of some comfort to her. “I brought you here…because it’s the only place around here where you can think.” She understood, and she knew why he’d done this. She’d been losing her mind, and he’d brought her here to calm down. “So,” he leaned forward and held her gaze. “Tell me. What happened with Declan that brought you into my office?”

She inhaled as the words came pouring out of her. “There’s this woman. Mrs. Connors. “Her husband,” he nodded. “he was drunk. He just…he hit her! He grabbed her by the throat, and this,” she inhaled as she said. “he was hurting her!”

“I’ll send someone around.” She let out a gasp. She didn’t even make a request, and he’d already granted it. “Make sure she’s alright, and I’ll have them make sure he knows not to lay a hand on her again.”

“Thank you.” She waited a beat and then requested. “Send Arthur.”

His brow arched in surprise. “Are you sure?”

“Yes,” she inhaled as she said. “I’m sure. Declan,” she rubbed her eyes, trying not to blow up at him, especially since he was being so careful. “he told me, in front of Mr. Connors… that this wasn’t the type of thing that Peaky Blinders do. So, he knows that he can do whatever he wants to her and that none of the men will interfere! Declan said it was his right as her husband to hit her.”

“That’s what the law says.” he said dryly.

“The law’s an ass and you know it!” She snapped at him as she held his gaze. “You break the law every day because you know it is!

“I do,” he nodded. After a moment he added. “The blinders are under my employment to help keep peace in the streets. Businesses pay me for protection. So, that…was part of his job to interfere.”

“I tried.” She inhaled before confessing. “He took my gun away.”

Those blue eyes of his flashed with anger. “He what?”

“He took my gun.” she inhaled as she said. “I aimed it at Mr. Connors to get him to take his hands off her----

“I don’t care if you blew Mr. Connors’s balls off, Kate.” he said firmly. “He doesn’t touch your f**king gun.”

“But---

“Was it the one I gave you?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

He exhaled tightly as he said. “Right. I’ll get that back for you. He doesn’t touch your f**king gun either. Next time he tries, you put a bullet in him. Ok?”

Assuming there would be a next time. Declan had been attractive. But the moment he refused to interfere, he became the most hideous man in the world. “Yes.”

Thomas caressed her face. “Good.” After a moment, he asked her. “Feel better?”

She nodded. “Yes.” and she did. She didn’t know how he’d managed to calm her down, but he had. His touch was gentle and soothing right now. He was touching her with the back of two of his fingers. Lizzie’s sharp words that Thomas was in love with her started echoing in her head. She bit her lip, and his gaze dropped to her mouth. She exhaled as she asked him in a shaking voice. “Was I overreacting?”

He frowned. “What?”

“Declan said I was.” She inhaled as she said. “I know, it was none of my business, and I know I keep overstepping. But I couldn’t---

“You’re a f**king firework Kate.” he said in a low voice as he held her gaze. “If he can’t handle the noise or the fire…then he has no right to enjoy the show.”

She nearly passed out right there in his arms. She wanted to say something. Thomas wrapped one arm around her, and he kissed her deeply. She whimpered as he tilted her head back. Her heart began to race as he gently worked his mouth against hers. God, she needed this. She needed him right now. She whimpered as he caressed her face tenderly.

Just as her mind started to spin, he broke the kiss and asked her. “Do you want me, Kate?”

God! Her mind just about broke with that question! “Why,” she inhaled as she asked him. “does it suddenly matter to you if I do or don’t want to be with you?”

He held her gaze as he said honestly. “Because it’s better for you when you want me back. I’m not taking you… unless you want to be with me.”

She’d never wanted him more. He didn’t bring himself into this. Normally, the pleasure was built around him having it the way he wanted it and he’d make her find fulfillment in his desires. Now, he was making sure that she was alright with him. She inhaled as she whimpered out his name. “Tommy.”

“Kate,” he rasped against her lips. “do you want me?”

“Yes.” she whispered as a tear trickled down her cheek. “I do.”

He kissed her, and she grabbed ahold of his waist. She didn’t think there was a chance in hell that she’d fall in love with him. She doubted that he knew how to love her or anyone else. But for right now, for this moment between them…it felt good. He felt good, and he felt right. His arms were strong, and his lips were gentle as they breathed words of affection in Romani to her while seeking her mouth as well. His eyes held an intense promise and a hope. His body…she’d never noticed until this very moment how he fit inside her. He filled her perfectly, and the way he felt under her hands, he was gratifying to feel with all his muscles. She’d secretly admired his tattoos for far too long. He was reasonably attractive, but right now, he was the most handsome man on earth. No fairy tale prince could ever come close to having Thomas Shelby’s looks.

She’d enjoy this while it lasted with him. Despite Lizzie's concerns, Kate knew better. Men in Thomas's position of prestige and power didn’t marry whores. She’d sold herself to him willingly, and as a result, any possibility of a future with him or any other man had been ruined forever. He’d been cruel when he’d told her so, but in his cruelty, he’d been honest to her. There was no happy ending for her in this life. But this, every moment that she shared with him, would be a bittersweet reminder of a possibility. He might think that he was in love, but he’d already warned her about this when she started going out with Declan.

Because they were physical a lot, there was always a possibility of feelings spinning out of control. That’s what was happening with him; it had to be. Yes. That’s why his emotions had changed because of the wedding. He wasn’t in love. He was missing being loved, and he was trying to find that with her. That’s all it was. He’d fall out of ‘love’ with her, and he’d move onto the next pretty face. That’s the kind of man he was. She wasn’t anybody special; she was just one of many faces in his bed. He’d forget all about her eventually.

Chapter 42: The hardest word

He didn’t want to let her go. Not when she felt so soft, warm, and perfect against him. She moaned as he kissed her for the millionth time. He could kiss her for hours and never get tired of her. He had his mouth buried in her perfect neck. She inhaled as she ran her hand through his hair; her long nails sent a chill down his spine. He couldn’t stop reacting to her. She rested her head on his shoulder and let him continue nibbling on her neck. God, she was so f**king beautiful.

The rain started coming down outside the tunnel, and she whimpered. “Tommy.”

“Kate.” he kissed her gently as he said. “God, you’re so f**king beautiful.”

Kate let out a soft snort. “No, I’m not.”

“Kate,” he exhaled as he pressed a few more kisses to her neck. “I’ve seen every inch of you. You’re beautiful.”

She shakes her head. “No. I’m not.”

He was silent for a moment, and then he asked her. “What were you talking about with Lizzie?” There was a certain part of her that felt wrong. He had a sneaking suspicion that she said something to Kate that had upset her.

“She was giving me some advice.” She said quietly. “As one whore to another.”

His blood began to rage as he said. “You’re not a whore, Kate.”

She let out a sharp and bitter laugh. “Here you are…with your cock buried inside me, and you dare to say to me that I’m not your f**king whore.”

He exhaled as he said. “Kate---

“It’s alright.” She inhaled as she said. “I made this decision; it’s alright. I chose this, and it’s…very enjoyable with you. But I am your whore, and that’s all that I’ll ever be. I’ll never be anything more than that to anyone.”

“Hold on.” He gripped her firmly by the head as he tilted her head up to make her look at him. He saw tears gathering in her eyes, and he realized that she was actually upset.“What did Lizzie say to you?”

She flinched as she croaked. “Nothing.”

“You’re lying, Kate.” She shook her head, and he exhaled. “I can read you like a f**king book, Kate. What did she say to you?”

She bit her lip and stated quietly. “She gave me something so I wouldn’t get pregnant.”

That caught his attention. “Hold on. You weren’t taking something?”

“I lost a baby, Thomas,” she reminded him. “I was already informed that it’s extremely unlikely that I’d ever get pregnant again.”

He exhaled as he realized what she was saying. She thought that she couldn’t have a baby. He wouldn’t believe that. He refused to believe that. God made sure that men like him suffered. There was no logical reason for him to take such a thing away from Kate. He shook his head. “Kate. There’s always a chance.---

“No, there isn’t,” she inhaled as she changed the subject. “She gave me some seeds and told me how to use them properly. She…also gave me some advice on how to please you.”

He stared at her. “How to please me?” He let out a laugh as he shook his head. “Don’t listen to her, Kate. She has no f**king clue what I want.”

Kate frowned at him. “But she---

“Doesn’t know a thing about me, and she never did.” He stared deeply in her green eyes as he said. “If I wanted you to be her, I’d have gone back to her weeks ago. Or I’d have just bent you over whatever table was nearest and just f**ked you the way I f**ked her.”

She wiped her eyes and whispered. “Sure.”

She didn’t believe him. At that moment, every cruel word that he’d ever said to her floated back to his memory. She carefully pulled away from him, and he withdrew from her. They took a moment to get their clothes in order. She was upset. She kept sniffling softly, and he knew it was his fault that she felt this way. He’d put her in this position, and he’d made her feel this way. Once their clothes were in order, she turned to walk away from him.

He caught her arm and pulled her back to him. “Kate, just wait.”

She frowned. “What?”

He knew what he had to say. He could say whatever he wanted when it came to making a deal, but this…this kind of thing he wasn’t good at. He exhaled as he ran his hand through her hair. “You’re not a whore, Kate.” She shook her head as he repeated. “No, you’re not---

“But I---

“You’re a lady, and Lizzie knows that. I don’t know what she said to you, and I know you don’t want to tell me. But you can’t f**king believe a thing she said, because she is jealous of you.” He knew what she needed to hear, and he decided to say that. “I know that I’ve called you a whore myself…but I never f**king meant it, Kate.”

She violently jerked away from him. “You never meant it!?”

Her voice echoed in the tunnel, and he gripped her shoulders tightly. “Kate, every time I said that…it was to make you try and stop fighting me.” She just stared at him for the longest time. “You’re not a whore, Kate. You could never be a whore. If you were, you’d have done everything that I tried to make you do without complaining or fighting me. You did. You knew that you deserved better than the way I was to you in the beginning, and you demanded better at all times. I thought…it’d be easier if you were just silent and did what I wanted.”

She stared at him and then bit out. “You…put a knife through my heart every time,” her voice broke as she said. “Every time…you called me that.”

“I know.” He inhaled as he said what she needed to hear. “Kate, I’m sorry.”

She shook her head as she whispered. “Don’t…you mock me.”

He should have known that she wouldn’t believe him. “ Kate---

“You don’t do apologies,” she spat at him. “So don’t you dare---

“Kate!” He said sharply. “You’re right, I don’t do f**king apologies. But when I say it, I mean it.”

She inhaled before whispering. “You have no idea how much I want to believe that.”

“I know,” he inhaled as he said. “I know that I hurt you, and I didn’t care how much at the time. I hurt you a lot in the beginning.” He ran his thumb over her lips as he said. “I can’t prove it, but I am sorry, Kate, about everything.”

She was silent for a long time, then she dropped her gaze as she wiped her eyes. “God, you don’t do apologies often. You’re really bad at apologizing.”

He nodded as he exhaled. “Yeah.”

After a long minute she said. “A bad apology is better than an insincere one.”

As she looked up at him, he repeated. “I don’t do apologies.”

“I know,” she inhaled as she whispered. “That’s why it was so bad,” she sniffled and wiped her eyes before stating. “But you tried, and I do appreciate the effort, Thomas.”

He cleared his throat. “About the wedding dress---

“i know.” she said quietly. “You got it cleaned; that was enough for me. You didn’t have to restore it. Why did you?”

He exhaled as he said. “You know why.”

“Yes, I do. But I want to hear it.”

He was silent for a long time before speaking. “There’s enough that haunts my dreams at night, Kate.” Her eyes widened for a moment. “Seeing and hearing you cry was one more thing I didn’t need.”

She was silent before asking. “So…you felt so guilty about what you did that I gave you nightmares?”

He nodded before reluctantly admitting. “Yeah.”

“Good!” She snapped at him, causing him to exhale. God, she could go from hot to cold in a matter of seconds. She exhaled before taking a step towards him. He could see that she was going to slap him, and he let her hit him. The slap was nothing compared to the pain he’d unleashed on her. "She inhaled," she said. “You killed me that night.” Tears started trickling down her cheeks. “No matter what you did to me…nothing hurt me more than what you said that night. I opened that box…and I was so happy for that one minute. I’d have let you do anything to me, and I do mean anything.”

He began to feel even worse than before. “ Kate---

“If you wanted to f**k me all night, I’d have let you! I’d have let you use my throat, my ass, whatever you wanted!” He wasn’t expecting to hear her ever admit that. “I would have let you f**k me until I bled and not say a word, because you found that dress for Rosemary!”

He frowned. “For Rosemary?”

She shook her head as she said. “That dress is tainted for me. It’s always been tainted, Thomas.”

“You’re the oldest---

“I was supposed to wear it for John,” she said. “I came back from the final fitting when I was informed he died.” He was a bastard. The worst f**king bastard to ever walk the earth. “So when you told me that I’d never wear my mother’s dress again, you told me something I already knew. That dress was already cursed for me, long before you.” He didn’t know what to say to her. He had no idea at all. She inhaled. “However, you did redeem yourself, and you went out of your way to ensure that Rosemary would be able to wear it when she marries. “The dress I let go of, but your words”—she shook her head as she said. “That…is going to take me a while.”

He exhaled as he nodded. “I know.”

After a moment she said. “Ask me to forgive you after I’ve had a whiskey or two in me.” He glanced at her to find her with a bittersweet smile on her face. “Come on. We can’t change the past. But…thank you for trying to make amends and for apologizing to me. I know how difficult it was because it’s something that you don’t do.”

“It’s not.”

She extended her hand, and after a moment he took her hand. As they walked out of the tunnel, he realized again that he didn’t deserve her. She was grace and kindness itself. He didn’t deserve her forgiveness or anything even remotely resembling forgiveness. But he wanted her. He didn’t care how many apologies it took; he was going to earn her forgiveness in the end. He glanced at her. She was wearing a black dress, which only made her look even more depressed. He didn’t know what he had to do to make her forgive him and then possibly fall in love with him. He’d put himself in this situation, and now he was paying for it. Sorry was the hardest word for him to say. If he had to say it ten thousand times, he’d say it to her.

---

Chapter 43: Dealing with Declan

She was so glad that she’d forgiven him in her mind all those weeks ago because he'd restored her mother’s dress for Rosemary. Thomas…was the WORST person she’d ever heard give an apology. She now saw why he didn’t do apologies, because he was insanely bad at them. In truth, it had never been about her mother’s dress that had upset her so. Yes, she’d been upset about him spraying her and the dress with his seed, but that was always something in the moment that she thought she could get out. It had been his words. His horrible and cruel words had broken her, not his actions. She’d been fighting him every moment up until he shouted those cold, cruel, and vile words at her. That was the moment that she’d gone into a state of shock and submitted to him and his wishes.

She’d never planned on marrying again, and he’d be the last man in the world that she’d dream of marrying, but if she were to marry, she would have never chosen to wear her mother’s wedding dress. It had become tainted in her eyes long before she’d ever met Thomas Shelby. The dress was a curse to her. A stark reminder of a love that she’d lost. It reminded her of the fact that she was supposed to marry John and never did. It also reminded her that was the same day that she’d lost the ability to become a mother while losing the child of the man that she loved. That dress represented death to her in more ways than one. Wedding dresses were supposed to bring luck. Her mother’s dress brought death to her. Rosemary, however, never knew her Mother. So the dress was all she had and she loved it. She’d cried harder about losing the dress than she did about losing her toys when they lost the house. So, Kate had been elated that Thomas had brought it back to her.

His words—it had been his words that had broken her. The thing is, now she accepted his cold, cruel nature. That’s who he was, and it was a part of him. She knew and accepted this. The reason why it had hurt so much was that he’d read into her deepest, most private thoughts and then shouted them out in her face. And he’d been able to do that because he felt the same way inside. No one was ever going to love him the way that Grace had. He was going to die alone because his way of living made it impossible for him to be loved the way that he needed. The kind of woman he needed would turn him into the police. This was probably the first time that she realized that Thomas hadn’t been describing her. He’d seen his sister find love and happiness with the man whose family killed his wife. Strange, how that never occurred to her just now.

They drove back in the car in silence until the moment they pulled up in front of his office. As he shut off the car, she said. “You lied to me again.”

He went still and looked at her in confusion. “What?”

“Maybe you didn’t even know that you were lying to me, but you were.” she inhaled as she said. “You didn’t say those things to hurt and humiliate me. You said them because you were hurting.”

He exhaled. “Kate, I don’t know what the f**k you’re talking about.”

“You said and did all those things to me on the day that your sister announced that she was marrying the man whose father had ordered a hit on your wife.” He reacted. Not much, but just enough for her to know that she struck a nerve. She decided to give him a little peace. “I understand that. It took me a minute to figure out how the hell you could know every single dark secret I felt about myself. Took me a minute to realize that you were feeling the exact same way too.”

He was silent a long time, and then he said. “There’s still hope for you, Kate.”

“No.” She shook her head as she told him pointedly. “All my dreams of marriage and motherhood died the day I lost John and his baby. Your taking me into your bed has no effect on me, not really. I get moody some days, but you're the same way.” He turned and studied her with those blue eyes of his. “I’m yours to do with as you please, and as long as you aren’t hurting me, I don’t mind being with you. You,” she inhaled as she tried to keep from blushing. “are very good, and it feels wonderful when I’m with you. But, I know for a fact that I’m not going to get married. Were I to choose to marry, I’d have to tell my fiancé about the time I spent in your bed, which would lead to two options. He’d end the engagement with me because he doesn’t love me enough to look past what I did, which shows he’s the sensible one. Or, he doesn’t care and overlooks it, but that only makes him a fool, and I’m not going to marry a fool.”

He chuckled as he turned towards her. His blue eyes were softer as he studied her face. “You’ll marry again, Kate.”

She shook her head. “No, I won’t. but until then… I shall take a page from your book and seek warmth and affection where I can. In truth, I don’t need anything more than that, as I’ve discovered.” There was a silence between them, which got shattered when her stomach rumbled loudly. She blushed as he let out a snort. “I’m sorry.”

“Why?” he inquired. “Is it that you’re the only woman who appears to never eat?”

“You said we were going to a pub!” She pointed out. “I wanted to save room for the food!”

"It's cheap food Kate, nothing to get excited about." He reached across her to open her door. “Right, out you go. Let me deal with Declan and call Arthur up. Then, I’ll go get you fed.”

“Thank you.”

She hopped out of the car but opened the back door to get the dress that she’d carefully wrapped up in paper. He frowned as he came around. “What’s this, Kate?”

“You said to wear green.” she reminded him. “I brought a green dress. May I change in your office?”

“Yes. That’s fine.”

“Thank you.”

They turned and walked into his office. Declan was sitting on the desk talking with Lizzie. They weren’t talking loudly, so that made her concerned that Lizzie had defied Tommy’s orders and told Declan what she was doing with Thomas. Thomas closed the door behind him, and they both stood up.

“Mr. Shelby---

Thomas sharply cut off Declan by ordering. “Give me her gun.”

Declan exhaled as he tried explaining. Shelby----

“I bought that gun for Kate myself to make sure that she had it if necessary. You had no right to take it. Now, give it back to her.” Declan had a sour expression on his face as he reluctantly handed her gun back to her. Quick as a wink, Thomas drew his hand back and struck him hard across the face! Kate’s jaw dropped as Thomas suddenly grabbed Declan by the front of his shirt and slammed him into the nearest wall!! “You EVER take her gun away from her, I will break your hand. If you EVER walk past someone in Small Heath needing help and ignore them, I’ll f**king cut you. Your f**king job is to keep the f**king peace. You don’t enable drunks to disturb the peace and harm people.”

“Mr. Shelby---

“I’m calling Arthur.” He said. “He’s going to deal with Connors, and you will f**king watch. If you’re not meant to be a f**king blinder…then you get the f**k out of my office.” Thomas turned to Kate and said firmly, “Kate, go get dressed, and then we’ll go.”

She nodded. “Yes, sir!”

She wasn’t going to argue with him in this mood. However, she did have to admit that he looked rather impressive like this. True, she’d have to fix things up with Declan afterwards, but he’d brought this on himself. All he had to do was help Mrs. Connors. Instead, he’d blamed her, and that was something that she couldn’t reconcile with.

After changing into the green dress, she folded her black dress in the paper and tied it up. Thomas was on the phone, and he was nodding. “Right. Thanks, Arthur. Yeah. Oh, you can take it personally.” He glanced at her and he stilled for a moment. His blue eyes scanned the length of her body and he didn't even bother trying to hide his obvious desire for her. She flushed in discomfort as he suddenly switched to Romani, causing everyone to frown. After a minute of conversation, he nodded. “Right. “Thank you, Arthur.” He hung up and exhaled. “That’s done. You ready to go?”

God, he was really asking her that in front of Declan and Lizzie? Still, she nodded. “Yes. I just need my purse.”

“Desk.” he nodded at it.

“Thank you.

As she picked it up, Declan asked in a shocked voice. “You’re going out with Mr. Shelby?!”

“I am taking Kate to the Garrison, as she’s never been to a pub before." Thomas stated. "You would probably be enjoying her company as well if you hadn’t f**ked up and needed to spend the evening in Arthur’s company. So, it’s your fault.”

“Mr. Shelby,” Declan protested. “she’s my girl!”

“That’s a bold assumption to make!” Kate stated. “Especially after what I witnessed from you today!”

“Kate,” Declan exhaled. “It’s against the laws of God and man to interfere with people who’ve been lawfully joined together.”

“God said to love your wife; nowhere does He condone beating them. Besides,” she stated. “That's not my problem right now. My problem is if you’re the kind of man who would raise a hand against a woman.”

“I wouldn’t!”

“I think you are!” She stated. “You made it sound like it was Mr. Connors’s right to hit his wife.”

“It is!”

“THERE!” She snapped. “THAT is why you can’t claim that I’m your girl. I would NEVER let a man hit me. If you ever put a hand on me or hit me, you’d be dead! You get one hit, and for your sake it had better be a good one, because it will be your last!”

They stood there staring at each other until Thomas cleared his throat. “Right, Kate, come along. The singing, the dancing, and the whiskey aren’t going to wait all night for you.”

“Alright.” She took her purse and exhaled deeply. “I need a drink. Don’t let me drink more than three whiskeys,” she informed him. “I get a little too friendly.”

“You’re in my pub, and you’re with me.” Thomas said as he placed his hand in the small of her back. “You can drink as much as you f**king want. No one will hurt you and I'll make sure you get back in one piece.”

And just like that, Kate knew that she was going to wake up tomorrow morning, completely naked in Thomas’s bed, having been f**ked more times than she could remember and nursing a hangover. It sounded like the perfect Saturday night experience at a pub with the old-fashioned regrets. Still, at least she was with Thomas Shelby. He’d take care of her, and he’d protect her. She could go out and do whatever she wanted, knowing that she had a big and bad watchdog with blue eyes making sure that she had fun and was safe at the same time.

---

Chapter 44: At the Garrison

He should have taken her out here weeks ago. Kate was a f**king firework alright. She just lit up the whole Garrison with her smile. Just now, she was on the floor dancing with one of his men. They all knew that she was his. Her walking in on his arm had been clue enough. It had been a long time since she’d seen him walk into a room with a beautiful woman on his arm. Kate, she was exceptionally beautiful, and she was growing more lovely by the moment.

Kate loved the Garrison. She’d walked in and promptly stated that it was just like she’d imagined. He’d changed it from the red and gold a few years ago, so it was better this way. A classier version of its older days. The red and gold hadn’t been very popular and were a waste of money, if he were being honest with himself. Still, he’d changed things back and made it for the people now that they rarely frequented the area. However, Kate fit right in. He’d made sure that there was an Irish band in a corner with a few singers, and the glow from the lights ensured that Kate got the ultimate pub experience.

He’d walked her up to the bar, and she’d ordered herself an Irish whiskey, surprising the bartender, Billy. She put in an order for fish and chips and extra tartar sauce, and he ordered a malt to go with her fish. Kate had pushed the whiskey away and enjoyed the malt with her fish. Malt had a lower alcohol content, and he was going to try to keep her as sober as possible. However, once she’d finished eating, she’d gone and joined in the dancing. You didn’t need to know the steps, really. Everyone just kind of made up the steps. The women held onto the men as they spun them around the sawdust floor. His Kate was the brightest woman on the floor with her mahogany hair and vibrant green dress. She had no problem dancing on her own, and she really enjoyed the music. There was this light in her that seemed to glow and spiral out of control. She didn’t look this radiant on Changretta’s ballroom floor. There was a little bit of gypsy magic in her after all. There had to be.

“Dance with me!” She gasped out as she ran back to her table for him and her third glass of whiskey.

He hadn’t danced since Grace. He shook his head. “I don’t dance.”

“Mhmm,” she held up a hand as she chugged the last of her whiskey before ordering. “dance with me! Thomas Shelby!” She grabbed his hand, and he let her tug her out of his seat and onto the dance floor. She fit too well in his arms. It was a fast song, but he wanted to hold her close, so he slowed down. “The room is spinning!”

“That’s the whiskey talking, Kate.” he stated.

She snorted. “Whiskey doesn’t talk.” God, she was funny. He pulled her closer as he moved her toward the backroom. “Where are you taking me?”

“Darts.”

She shook her head. “No. I want to dance with you!”

He couldn’t help but smile a little bit at her. “Really?”

“Yes. God knows when I’ll get to do this again.”

“So, you do like to dance then?” He inquired.

“Of course I do!” She stated. “This is fun!! The ballroom was fun too, but my God, I felt like a piece of meat being fed to a pack of tigers.”

He shook his head as he said. “You say the strangest f**king things at times, Kate.”

“Thank you.” she laughed as he pulled her close to him. Somehow, his being near settled her a bit. As he moved closer to the backroom, she asked. “What did you tell Arthur?”

He didn’t want to tell her. He’d told Arthur that Declan had taken Kate’s gun away and he needed to be taught a lesson when it came to respecting women. He didn’t want any wife beaters in his group of men, and he wasn’t about to let Declan turn into one. Arthur, Jeremiah, and a few other blinders would beat a lesson into Declan that he wouldn’t forget. “I’ll tell you tomorrow.”

“Why not now?”

“Because I don’t think you’re sober enough to understand me, Kate.”

She snorted. “I am VERY sober! I told you… I just get a little bit friendly when I drink! I am sober.”

He shakes his head as he takes her into the backroom to the dartboard. “We’ll see, Kate. You played before?”

She exhales. “Once or twice.” She picks up a dart… and imbeds it right in his cherry wood. She’s too happy to notice. “See?”

“You missed the f**king board, Kate.” he pointed out.

She shrugged. “It was my first shot! I’m warming up.”

He exhaled as he said. “Right. Come on,” he removed his coat and set it on a chair. “If I win, you’re buying me a bread pudding.”

“And if I win,” she picked up the darts that she dropped. “I want your tongue between my legs.” He paused, wondering just how sober she was at this moment. She laughed at him. “What?”

“Loser buys dessert.” He’s trying not to focus on just how sweet and wet she’d be after dancing up a storm. This is something of a date, and he’s trying not to get between her legs right away. They’re not making it back home tonight, so they’re definitely going to wind up back at his old home and in bed together, but she wasn’t going to make it easy on him. Not with that dress, those eyes, that laugh, and that hair of hers.

“Hmm, what if I don’t want dessert?”

She was going to kill him. “Kate,” she picked up a dart and threw it at the board, this time hitting a bullseye. He went still as she perched on the table, her skirt above her knees. She smirked at him as she threw her next two darts, hitting a 20 and a 13 next. She set down her darts as he exhaled. “I have a feeling…that you’re hustling me, Kate.”

She laughed as she said. “You have a problem with that, Mr. Shelby?”

“No,” he exhaled as he picked up his darts. “You’re a mad one, Kate. F**king mad.”

She just laughed and threw her head back. The game was actually pretty close. He wasn’t sure if Kate was holding back on him or not based on her first three shots. However, it could be the alcohol hitting her as well, but she gave him a run for his money. It wasn’t an easy task because he really, really wanted to give her pleasure. But he needed to ease off the sex with her a bit, or at least try to. She was a f**king temptress and it wasn’t easy. In the end, his conscience got the better of him, and he purposefully won. She let out a whine as she threw her three darts at the board anyway.

“Kate,” he couldn’t help but laugh as he noticed that this time she hit the bullseye all three times. “You have the damnedest luck.”

“Or,” she turned towards him and stated. “Maybe I wanted to test you.”

He shrugged as he reached for his coat. “Why?”

“Something Lizzie said to me earlier.” He didn’t like the sound of that. Kate exhaled as she said. “I had to get drunk; otherwise, I’d never have the nerve to ask you this.”

He turned towards her. “Ask me what, Kate?”

She exhaled as she said. “Lizzie said that you’re---

“Tommy!” They both jumped at the sound of Arthur’s voice. He exhaled and rubbed his brow. He was on edge a bit right now, and he didn’t know what the f**k Arthur was going to say. However, whatever Kate was going to say put him even more on edge. He exhaled sharply. “We took care of Connors. He isn’t touching his wife again. Not after that.”

“That’s good.” he exhaled. “Thank you, Arthur.”

“No problem. As for Declan,” that’s what he was f**king afraid of Arthur saying.” “He’s alright. Only a couple of broken ribs and a bloody nose.”

“Hold on!” Kate said as her brain tried to understand what happened here. “What about Declan?”

“It’s nothing.” he said, trying to cut Arthur off.

But Arthur had a few drinks already and wasn’t sober. “Oh! Tommy had me and Jeremiah teach him what happens to a man who ignores a woman who’s hurt. He won’t be making that mistake again!!”

“You beat him up?” Kate demanded as she wobbled in her shoes. “You had Declan beat up?”

He exhaled as he admitted. “Yes, I f**king did.”

“You’re a monster!”

“No.” He said firmly. “He didn’t do his job right, and he had to be taught a f**king lesson!”

“Words were enough!” She stated. “You did it because of me!”

Yes, he had, but she didn’t know that yet. “Not everything is about you, Kate.”

“Oh, don’t play games with me!” She snapped at him. “You did it because you’re f**king jealous!”

“Jealous!?” He half-shouted at her. “Of that f**ker who couldn’t lift his hand to protect a woman from a drunk?”

“I’m just going to go now.” Arthur mumbled as he grabbed the doors, pulling them closed.

“It doesn’t matter!” She spat. “You know that’s not why. It’s him! The fact that he’s the one touching me, putting his hands on me, kissing me---

“He’s f**king kissed you?”

“Not yet!” She snapped. “It’s the thought that you can’t---

“Kate.” He grabbed her around the waist and tugged her against him. “I don’t give a f**k about his hands because I know he can’t satisfy you.” He stared into those damn green eyes of hers and declared. “You need me.”

There were just inches between them. Her hands were digging into his neck, and his hands were gripping her skin. The violin in the room was winding up in a feverish pitch, sending the tension between them through the roof. Kate shifted, and she tried to pull away from him. That only made him hold onto her tighter. She tried, she fought, she struggled, but she gave up. He wasn’t letting her get away from him anymore.

“I hate you!” She shouted at him. “God, I hate you!”

“No, you don’t hate me, Kate!” He snapped back at her.

She stared back at him before confessing. “You’re right, I don’t hate you. But you frustrate the hell out of me!”

“What the f**k do you think you’re doing to me?” He demanded. “You make my f**king head spin!”

“You!!!” She inhaled as she snapped at him. “You make me so mad that I don’t know if I want to be f**ked by you or if I want to kill you!!!”

“Well, I’m not going to let you kill me,” he roared at her. “So get on that f**king table Kate!”

“Make me, you bastard!!”

He did. He picked her up and half slammed her on the table. She let out a groan as he got on top of her, yanking her hips into the position where he wanted her. She was hanging off the table a little, but she was at the right point for him to take. “That’s not comfortable.” She whined underneath him.

“i don’t f**king care!” He snapped at her before readjusting her hips so she was halfway on the table. “Better?”

“Yes!!” He released her so he could undo his trousers and shorts. This woman! This f**king woman could get him hard with an argument the way some women could with a kiss. Changretta had said something about arguing and love. It hadn’t made sense until this moment. Kate ran her hand through his hair as she said. “I don’t know what to do with you, Thomas Shelby.”

He didn’t know what to do either. He exhaled, trying to come up with an answer for her, but none came to mind. Then, he remembered her telling him to apologize to her when she had a few whiskeys in her. “Forgive me, Kate,” he said as he held her gaze. “for everything I’ve done to you. Forgive me so we can move on.”

She looked him in the eye and shook her head as she said. “I forgave you weeks ago, you idiot.”

“What the f**k?” He could only stare at her. He was rarely shocked. No. He was NEVER shocked! Her admission—it had shocked him to the core!

She let out a laugh before stating. “You were so terrible… You deserved to suffer for a few hours!!”

He shook his head. “My little f**king witch.”He grabbed her right leg and threw it over his shoulder. “You will pay for that.”

She had the audacity to roll her eyes. He had to take her. Now! He didn’t even bother removing her underwear; he pulled them to the side and thrust roughly into her wet entrance. She let out a gasp as those green eyes of hers bulged. She swore quietly underneath him as he kept her pinned underneath him. This wasn’t one of their gentle times. There was too much heat, too much passion, and too much to process between the two of them, and he took her accordingly. She was his. She didn’t know it to the extent, but she was his. He could feel it in his blood. Her nails dug into his back as her one leg wound tightly around his neck. He spoke in Romani to her. No. He wasn’t speaking Romani. He was chanting it like it was a f**king prayer.

She was gasping underneath him. “W-what are you s-saying? Oh!”

He ignored her questions. She had her little book in her purse; she’d have her continue writing down how many times they had sex tonight. But tonight, they weren’t leaving this room. He could blame what was going to happen on a lot of things. The full moon. The music. The violins and the bagpipe in the air… The whiskey. Her green dress. Her provocative and eager willingness. His hunger and desire for her. His love. His need to see her happy. The utter hunger in him to see her full and round with his child.

Bear my child.

This was the night that she would conceive his child. He could feel it in every fiber of his being.

Chapter 45: Consequences

Kate moaned as she woke up. Her head…was spinning. She was sleeping…on the floor!? actually, she wasn’t fully asleep. She moaned as she realized that she was lying on her side and a blanket was thrown over them. He was holding tightly onto her in his sleep, and she tried to figure out how to get out from his arms. She gave up and just collapsed back on his chest. She was so sore, and she felt so damn full!! That was when she realized that Thomas still had his cock buried in her! She tried sitting up but gave up. Her head just fell into the crook of his arm again.

He let out a heavy exhale as he stirred. He let out an exhale as he rested his hand on her naked hip. She exhaled as he pressed kisses to her body. “Good morning, sweetheart.”

She moaned as he whimpered his name. “T-Tommy.” He nibbled on her neck, causing her to gasp sharply. “Oh!”

“You alright?”

She exhaled as she nodded. “Y-yes, I’m just…a little sore.”

“I wouldn't be surprised.” He pulled her close. “You…are something else when you’ve been at the whiskey.”

She moaned as she inhaled. “Oh, my head.”

“I told you, sweetheart, you were going to be sore.”

She had to assume that he was telling her the truth. She wasn’t remembering a damn thing. “I don’t…remember too much.”

“I know.” He let out an exhale as he reached over her head and handed her the notebook that she used to keep track of how many times they’d slept together. “I had you write everything down.”

She exhaled as she said. “Thank you.” She took a moment as she read what they’d done. They’d had sex five times. Thomas even went as far as to have her put the time down. On the table, against the wall, on the table again, and then on the floor twice. Five times! God, no wonder she was sore. He was getting hard inside her! Thomas kissed her again, and she let go of the notebook. “It seems like I—I had a good time.”

“You did. You partied a bit hard, Kate. Four whiskeys and a beer.”

“Four,” she moaned as she ran her hand through her hair. “I told you not to let me drink more than three beers.”

“I know.” He kissed her gently. “I didn’t want to stop you; you were having too much fun.” After a few moments, he asked her. “Do you remember anything?”

“Umm,” she closed her eyes as she said. “I remember…the dancing. The singing. The food and…the malt.” "After a moment," she said. “I owe you a bread pudding.”

“So, you remember the dartboard game?”

“Yes. I remember,” she blushed. “God, we had a fight.

“Yes, but,” he kept kissing her neck. “We made up so f**king good, didn’t we?”

She nodded. “Y-yes.” He chuckled as he kissed her. She wrapped her arms around his neck. He shifted inside her, and she whispered. “Slowly, Tommy. Slowly, please.”

He kissed her gently as he asked. “Are you sore, sweetheart? We don’t have to.”

God, that was so sweet of him. “It’s alright,” she whispered as he held her close. “Just go slowly.”

He exhaled as he said. “Just a minute.” He pulled out of her, and she groaned. God. It felt like he’d been in her all night!

He parted her legs, and she opened her eyes to find him between her legs. “Thomas? What are you---

“You’re too sore.” He cleared his throat. “Did you bring your salve?”

“No,” she exhaled as she said. “I don’t feel terribly sore.”

“That’s good to know. However,” he pressed a kiss to her thigh. “I assure you, sweetheart. You need a break. I had you five times last night. You were f**king oerfect, so you can have the day off.”

She blushed. “Thank you.” She felt his tongue between her legs, and she groaned. “Oh, God! Tommy!”

He let out a grumble as he pleasured her with his tongue for a moment. She closed her eyes, grasping ahold of his hand as he slowly and gently made love to her swollen folds with his tongue. She relaxed, losing herself in him and his touch. 115 more times. That’s what she owed him, and her heart was starting to ache each time that she was with him. Even though she didn’t remember much after the first time they’d had sex, she knew it had to be amazing because she felt incredible. She felt happy right now; despite there being some missing parts of her memory, she knew she had a good time.

She finally came over Thomas's tongue, and he let out a groan as she gasped. A moment later, he found his release, spending his seed over the blanket that they’d shared. He exhaled before climbing back up so he could kiss her. She closed her eyes and exhaled softly as she wrapped her arms around his body. After a few tender moments, Thomas said, “I need to get you fed before you faint dead away.”

She nodded before whispering. “You need to eat too.”

“I’m fine.”

She slapped his cheek gently as she said. “I’m not eating alone.”

He smirked. “Alright. Up you go, go,,sweetheart.” ”he winding his arms around her waist, and he gently hauled her up to her feet. Kate moaned. God! She was in agony! Her back hurt so much. She stood up and wobbled as she grabbed ahold of the table that he’d bent her over last night. “Easy, easy, sweetheart.” He kissed her neck. “I’ve got you.”

“I’m fine,” she mumbled.

“Hmm. This,” he kissed her neck. “That is why I said you need to rest.”

“I’m not tired,” she said quietly. “Not in the normal sense. I just feel very,” he ran his hand from her shoulders down to the base of her spine. “relaxed.”

“I know,” he said quietly as he pressed kisses to her bare back. “I know what you mean, Kate.”

She didn’t know how they were able to get dressed and leave that back room, but they were. Thomas, he took her out the back entrance so no one saw them leaving the Garrison. She held his hand as they walked slowly down the street together, and he had his coat around her shoulders. It was around 8:00, and it was still raining. She loved this kind of weather.

After a few moments of silence, she asked him. “Is there any food at your house?”

He frowned. “I think so. Why?”

“Think… Instead of you buying breakfast, I’ll make breakfast.”

He chuckled. “You can cook?”

“Yes, I can cook, Thomas!”

“Sorry, Kate. It’s just I didn’t see a rich girl from Oxford learning how to cook.”

“Daddy wouldn’t pay the kitchen staff, so I had to learn.”

He held up her hand as he inquired. “With hands like these?”

“That’s what gloves and beef tallow are for, Mr. Shelby.” Thomas said nothing as he leaned forward and buried a kiss in her neck. “Thomas!” She gave him a nudge as she said. “We’re in public!”

“I don’t care,” he said simply. “I don’t f**king care.”

She rolled her eyes. “You are so territorial, Tommy.”

“As I told you last night,” he said in a low voice. “You’re f**king mine, Katherine Ann Carter.”

She inhaled raggedly as she spoke. “Tommy, we have to---

“So!” She and Thomas both jumped at the sound of someone yelling at them. That someone turned out to be Declan! Declan had his arm in a sling, and his face was bandaged. He looked as if he’d been attacked by a wild animal. However, he was absolutely furious, and Kate felt the blood drain out of her face as he stormed towards them. “It is true! You are Thomas Shelby’s f**king whore!”

Kate couldn’t find the words. Thomas, he didn’t hesitate to react. He stepped away from her, grabbed Declan by the back of the neck… and plunged him face first into a water trough!! Declan sputtered and tried to get free, but he couldn’t! Thomas yanked him up and shouted in Declan’s face. “You f**king take that back! Now!”

She inhaled as tears dripped down her cheeks. “Thomas—”

“Everyone knows.” Declan coughed. “Look at her…still in the same dress from last night! You two…never left the Garrison. The whole of Small Heath f**king knows!!” Declan turned to her, and she felt terrible as he said. “How long?”

She shook her head. “Declan---

“No!” He shook his head as he said. “You tell me…the f**king truth. For once!! Tell me the truth!!”

Thomas went to shove him under the water again, but she shouted. “Thomas!!” He was furious, but he looked at her. She shook her head as she whispered. “Don’t.”

“Kate---

“Let him go. Please.” Thomas just glowered at Declan, and she said. “Just let him go!!” He did… dropping him right into the trough. She shook her head as she said. “God, you’re such a bastard.”

Thomas crossed his arms and just stood there shooting bullets into Declan’s back. Declan came up, and he coughed a moment before repeating. “So? Is it true? Are you his whore?”

“No, she f**king isn't!” Thomas snapped.

“Yes, I am.” She stated quietly. While she didn’t have an obligation to Declan, she did owe him the truth. She’d been lying to him from the beginning, and she needed to tell him the truth.

Thomas shook his head. “Kate---

“Thomas, let me talk. Please.”

Declan looked at her as he asked. “How long?”

She sniffled before admitting. “Since Christmas.”

Declan went white. “What?”

“Rosemary and I got kicked out of our house when my father died,” she explained. “Everything about Thomas giving me a job as his son’s nanny was true. The only thing I didn’t mention was that I had a debt collector after me. I owed nearly 9,000 pounds. I couldn’t pay it back. I tried finding jobs, and I couldn’t get a job. A prostitute at my boarding house heard my situation and took me into work with her.”

Declan looked at her as if she were the scum of the earth. “Are you serious?”

She continued. “I didn’t get that job until the hotel proprietor said that… I was what Mr. Shelby was looking for.”

Thomas spoke up. “I paid off the debt, and Kate is simply paying me back. That’s all it is. She’s not my whore.”

Declan looked at him as if he were insane. “She is a whore!! She is literally letting you f**k her outside of marriage! And you,” Declan shouted at her. “you lied to me! You let me think that you were this good, honest, Christian girl! You weren’t!” Her eyes burned as he shouted. “You’re a filthy slag!”

Thomas lunged for Declan, who fell backwards. Kate grabbed ahold of Thomas's wrist. “Thomas, he’s not worth it! Let’s get out of here!”

“Kate---

“I want to go home!” She inhaled. “Please!” he studied her a moment, and she begged. “Thomas! Please!”

He exhaled, and then he nodded. “Alright. Alright, I’ll get you out of here.”

He wrapped his arm around her, and he hurried her out of there. She fought to ignore all the prying eyes that were staring at them. Last night, everything had been speculation. Now, the whole of Birmingham knew exactly what she was.

“I’ll kill him if you want.” Thomas bit out.

“No,” she whispered. “Leave him be.”

“He had no right---

“He had every right.” She croaked. “I should have never even thought about getting involved with him or any man while I’m with you. I told you before…no man is going to want me.”

He was silent before speaking. “You’re looking at the wrong kind of man, mate.”

She was silent before simply reminding him. “You said it best. “No one will ever love me because no one marries a whore,” she inhaled as she said. “But you can’t blame him. I made this decision, and now I have to deal with the consequences. Declan…he wasn’t the one, obviously, but…that doesn’t make the truth hurt any less.”

He was silent a moment before stating. “Then if you want the truth, it’s my fault. Not yours.”

“No.” She shook her head. “It’s my fault. I made the decision to become a whore to get money fast. You may have propositioned me… But it was my choice to accept it. I made my bed…now I’m lying in it.” She sniffled and wiped her eyes before asking. “Can we…not talk about this anymore, please?”

He exhaled reluctantly before nodding. “Alright.” He wrapped an arm around her and just let her silently cry on his shoulder. She’d ruined her life, and she couldn’t even find a way to blame him for it. His rescue had damned her. She’d known this, and she’d gotten into his bed anyway. Now, she was reaping the consequences of that decision, and there was no way to get out of this.

Chapter 46: Irish fever

March 14th, 1926

---

Thomas exhaled roughly as he pressed Kate’s body to him as he practically rutted into her as if she were a mare in heat. Her head dropped into the grass as he thrust into her one last time, and she fell apart. She came on his cock with a sob, and he locked her hips into place as he filled her. God, she must look quite the sight in the morning sunrise like this. She was on her knees, her back towards him, her arse in the air, and her hands outstretched towards the rising sun. His breathing was hot and labored, his hand underneath her belly, breathing Romani again as he kept her close to him. He shifted, and she could swear that his cock was in her womb at this angle. She let out a whimper as her arms buckled.

“I’ve got you,” he assured her as he laid her on her side. “I’ve got you, sweetheart.”

She said nothing for a moment as she recaught her breath. It had been two weeks since that incident with Declan. She’d been quiet for two days, and he’d given her some space before taking her on a horseback ride. It had been absolutely wonderful to be on a horse again. He didn’t ask her about Declan, but she was alright with that. He was right. Declan had been a little thing, and ending things with him hadn’t really hurt her that much. She knew he wasn’t the right man for her. It was just what he represented. He represented every good and honest man in the world. She could lie about her past, but she knew that these sorts of things always got found out, and she wouldn’t want to keep such a huge secret hidden from her future husband. He deserved to know the truth. However, Declan's reaction showed that the truth was too much for him. No decent man would have her after this.

“Are you alright?” Thomas asked, his hands soft and gentle as he traced her body.

She nodded as she closed her eyes. “I’m alright, Thomas. Honest. I’m just tired.”

He ran his hand back down her throat, causing her to wince a little. She had a minor sore throat, but nothing else worth noting. He exhaled as he said. “I have to leave for a few days tomorrow.””

“Where are you going?” She asked.

“Ireland.” Her eyes widened. Ireland was a place of occasional unrest, so if he was going there, there was trouble. “I’ll be gone for a few days. So, I’ll need you to take care of the house and Charlie.”

“Ireland?” She inhaled. “Why?”

He exhaled before telling her. “Éamon de Valera resigned as president of Sinn Féin.”

“Sinn Féin?” She asked softly.

“Irish political party,” he caressed her face as he said. “I have a meeting with him.”

“Oh.” she bit her lip and said. “You’ll be careful, right?”

“I'm always careful, Kate,” he said directly. “Got you to come home to.”

She rolled her eyes and reminded him of the real reason he had to come back to. He was getting somewhat bolder with his words, and she had to admit, on occasion she thought about being married to him. But she knew that she wasn’t enough for him. A man like Thomas had dreams and ambition. Too many people knew about what she did with him, and he wasn’t the type of man to marry her. He’d keep her on the side, paying for her while he used her. Sex with him now was natural; it wasn’t forced or anything anymore. Still, she couldn’t do that. She couldn’t live this way with him after she’d paid him back.

“I think you mean Charlie.” She reminded him. “Your son?”

“Charlie and Rosemary too. Got all three of you to come home to.” Kate subtly shook her head and turned her head away from him. He pulled her closer as she sniffled. “Also, I have Charlie's doctor coming over tomorrow around noon. I’ll have him take a look at you and Rosemary as well.”

“I’m fine.”

“No. “You’re not.” he said quietly. “You’re really tired, Kate. I’m worried I’m wearing you out again and you’re not telling me.”

She smiled at those words. It was nice when he showed that he cared. These past two weeks, he hadn’t been too obvious with his feelings, and she appreciated that. She wasn’t sure that she’d take it if he were to suddenly blurt out that he was in love with her. As of right now, their time was starting to run out. He only had to make love to her 85 more times, and then she was free to go. Strange, how it had managed to go from f**king to making love. With Declan out of the picture, they went from sleeping together 16 or more times a week down to 14 times a week. That meant…in 6 weeks she would be free to leave his house. Leave him, Charlie and Frances. As she pondered that for a moment, she realized that she was going to miss everything so terribly much, especially him. While their relationship wasn’t quite orthodox, she had gotten to know him and his moods very well.

“I'm just tired, Thomas,” she assured him. “It’s nothing more than that.” She caressed his face before teasing him. “Maybe I’ll get some sleep with you gone!”

He shook his head as he said. “If you need anything, you know that you can just ask for it and I’ll give it to you. If you need a few nights in your old room, that’s alright too.”

That was touching because she knew what he was like when he slept alone. When she had that first month off, she’d gone downstairs for a glass of milk. Coming back up, she’d heard him thrashing and gasping. She’d opened the door to his room just as he’d bolted upright, all covered in sweat. She’d gone in without hesitating and got a damp cloth. He hadn’t said much to her as she’d wiped his body down. All he’d said to her was one word. “France.” She’d known and understood. After that, she’d removed her slippers and gotten into bed with him. He didn’t do anything to her, but she let him hold her, and they’d both managed to fall asleep. He slept peacefully when she was in the same bed with him. So, she knew that these two days in Ireland were going to be hard for him. The truth was, she wasn’t sure that she’d be able to sleep again with Thomas not in the bed beside her.

Tomorrow night she’d find out what it’d be like without him being around her. She wasn't sure that she was looking forward to being alone at all.

---

March 17th, 1926

---

God, he was glad to be out of Ireland. It had gone well; Churchill was pleased, but he was growing tired. He needed a f**king vacation or something like that. He didn’t think that he’d ever think or say those words, much less think them! He needed to take Charlie, Kate, and Rosemary away somewhere for a week at least. He needed to get out of this house; he felt as if he were dying in it. He needed to spend time with Kate. He needed her to see herself differently. If they went away together, they’d be able to spend time together as a makeshift family. She’d be able to see herself as a mother, and hopefully, that would make her consider marriage. Because try as he might, he couldn’t get her to stop thinking of herself as a whore.

True, the sleeping around didn’t help matters, and he wasn’t as strong as he thought he was. He’d started ignoring their regularly scheduled times together in order to give her some space. She then sought him out. At this point, he was so utterly out of his mind in love with her that it bordered on obsession! So, he found that he completely lacked the willpower to reject her or her advances. And when Kate came on strong, she could f**king come on. He suggested that they stop sleeping together, and she’d flat out told him no. Her reasoning was that she made this decision, and she was choosing to follow through with it. He could have argued with her about it, but he himself was the same way. If he decided to do something, he saw it through. He couldn’t fault her for being the same way, even if it was inconvenient to him.

It was nearly midnight as he made his way up the stairs. He was tired. He needed to sleep in his own bed again. God, he missed Kate being there. He hadn’t slept this badly since before Christmas. Kate calmed him and kept the shovels and screams at bay. She kept him calm, and he felt all out of sorts when she wasn’t there. And it wasn’t just at night. He missed hearing her laughter. He missed seeing her around. He didn’t need to touch her, but he missed the moments of watching her in the library with him, quietly reading a book in front of the fireplace. Her presence soothed his soul. Grace never disturbed him in the library. Kate just stayed in there, and the sight of her was enough to take whatever headache he had away. She took care of him too. He found it irritating initially, but he realized that it was nice having someone there who actually cared. He found that he missed taking care of her as well. He’d bought way too many gifts for all of them. The one he was most looking forward to giving Kate was the emerald engagement ring that he’d picked up for Kate. She wasn’t there yet, but it was getting close. He could see it in her eyes.

He’d cornered Lizzie before he’d left, and she’d admitted that she’d told Kate that he was in love with her. That…had made so much f**king sense to him. But the thing that stood out was how Kate hadn’t run from him. She let him talk to her, let him kiss her, and let him make love to her. She asked him questions, direct ones, to try and get a feel for his emotions. So, she knew, but she was unsure, and she didn’t believe that it was possible for anything between them to change. But things were changing between them. She chose menus for the house and dragged him out to join all of them for dinner every evening. She said he could miss lunch, put in an appearance at breakfast, and see Charlie off every morning. But he had to be present at every single dinner. The one time he said he wouldn’t do it, she had dinner served in his library. So, he’d joined them for dinner every night. It had been awkward at first, but with Charlie starting school, he saw that she was providing an opportunity to catch up with his son. Soon, dinner became one of the things that he looked forward to. She saw him off every time he left for the house, checking to see that he was good to go. Hell, she even gave an opinion on his ties! She’d just woven her way into the fabric of his life, and he wanted to keep her in his life.

He’d thought about Grace. Her picture, which had made her look cold at first, now seemed softer. They hadn’t had a chance for happiness. Changretta was right. Resisting Kate and the idea of finding love again was selfish and disrespectful. Not just to Kate, Charlie, and Rosemary. But to himself and to Grace…she’d had so many dreams that she never got to see come to fruition. As for him, all his dreams of happiness and a loving wife and family had died when she died. But now, he was finding all of that again with Kate. A sort of desperation was taking over him, almost a sort of madness. He’d lost out on two years and wasted all that time with Grace. He wasn’t willing to lose out on that much time with Kate.

The sound of vomiting caused him to frown, especially since it was coming from his room. He stepped into his room and set down his bags, noting that his bed was unmade. The covers were thrown back, and the light on his side of the bed was on. He noted a book was on the covers as well. Kate was the only one who brought books to bed. Was Kate sleeping in his room? She must be. No one else would be in his room. He noted that there was a light on in the bathroom. He exhaled as he set down his bags and moved in there. Sure enough, Kate was kneeling at the toilet, her head buried in the bowl. She let out a sob of abject misery.

“Kate?” She moaned and looked up; her eyes were glassy, and her head was coated in sweat. That wasn’t good.

“T-Tommy?”

“I’m here.” He moved towards her, pulling out his handkerchief to dab at the vomit in the corner of her mouth. “Are you sick?”

She nodded as she slurred. “Don’t get close. Doctor said… I’d be fine s-soon.”

So, she was sick. “What’d he say you have?” He asked as he touched her head. She had a fever, and while he didn’t have a thermometer, he knew that it was high. Her skin was turning red.

“I don’t…feel good.” She turned back to the toilet and vomited again.

“I’ve got you. I’ve got you.” He held her hair back from her face and noted that the back of her nightgown was drenched. Yes, she was burning up, and he probably needed some extra hands. He got up and rang for Frances and two of the maids. He hurried back into the bathroom and found her passed out on the floor. “F**k!”

He turned towards the tub and turned the water on cold. If she was this hot, he needed to cool her down. He kicked off his shoes and socks and quickly removed his coat, vest, and shirt before picking her up from the floor. She stayed limp in his arms, and heat was radiating from her. F**king hell, she was burning up! He got into the tub and held onto her.

“Kate?” No response. His heart raced as he put his fingers to her throat. He found a pulse. It was there. It was constant. She was just unconscious. He exhaled as he swore. “F**k.” the door to his room opened, and he shouted. “In here!”

“Mr. Shelby!” That was Frances. “What’s the matter?”

“It’s Kate!” She rounded the corner, and she gasped. “I need you to call the doctor.” She hurried towards the sink and handed him a thermometer before running out of the room. “She’s burning up!”

“Hello!” he heard her on the phone. “Mr. Shelby’s doctor right away. It’s an emergency!” She cleared her throat. “Mr. Shelby! What’s her temperature? It was 101 earlier this evening.”

He tucked the thermometer under her tongue and held it there. His heart sank as the red line rose and rose before finally stopping in the hundreds. He exhaled as he removed it and tried to read it. His hand was shaking as he said. “104. something.” A maid ran into the room with her robe. “You, go downstairs, get a bowl of ice, and bring it up here. We’ve got to get her temperature down right away. Tell the maid behind you the same thing.”

“Yes, Mr. Shelby!” She turned and ran out of the room.

He held onto Kate, trying to get his breathing under control. He wasn’t going to lose her. He’d lost enough in this world, and he wasn’t going to lose Kate.

Chapter 47: Dehydration

By the time the doctor arrived, it was nearly 1:00 in the morning. Kate’s temperature had risen to 105, and he was so cold that he couldn’t feel his hands anymore. The doctor made him get out of the bath, but he didn’t go far. He wasn’t leaving her. Rosemary had woken up, and she was crying quietly in the door of the bathroom. He told her that she couldn’t get any closer and not to touch anything in his room. Rosemary had the sniffles already, but she and Charlie were on the tail end of whatever was burning Kate up. She did regain consciousness, but she was delirious. She didn’t even know who he was, nor did she recognize Rosemary.

One hour later, her temperature had dropped to 104, and he was getting frantic with the doctor! Kate wouldn’t stop vomiting!Her body was growing exhausted. When she’d thrown up for the fourth time, he’d lost his mind.

“If you don’t f**king do something,” he shouted. “I swear to God, I’m going to kill you!”

“Mr. Shelby,” the doctor said. “I am trying my best!”

“He really is Mr. Shelby.” Frances said, trying to calm him down, but he wouldn’t be calmed. “She can’t hold anything down.”

“But she’s dehydrated!” He said. “She needs water!”

“She keeps throwing it up!” The doctor said in frustration. “I am trying my best, but there’s nothing to be done.”

“She needs water.” he repeated. “She’s going to die if she keeps losing much more fluid.” That made Rosemary start crying, and he closed his eyes. He wasn’t good at this. He needed her. He was utterly useless when it came to things like this. “So tell me … what the f**k do we need to do to get her to keep the water down?”

“Mr. Shelby…this is beyond my control.”

He swore and stormed towards the phone. He should have done this hours ago. He called Uncle Charlie and told him to get someone over to Zilpha Lee and get her over to his house because there was an emergency. Then, he called one of his men and told them to get Johnny. Johnny had to bring his wife, Daiena, and whatever herbs she had because this doctor was useless. For a long time, he stood at the desk. The weight of the world was on his shoulders, pushing on him, threatening to break him. But he wouldn’t break. Not one. If she died, then he would break. Because he would die too in that very second as well.

“There is,” the doctor said slowly. “A possible treatment.” He turned towards the doctor, who seemed unsure. “I read about it in a medical journal last year. I’ve never done it---

“Then get the journal and do it.”

“Mr. Shelby,” he inhaled. “Saline injections were used during the American cholera epidemic. It’s not been used since, and I—I only read about it because Dr. Rudolph Matas is claiming that it’ll help with dehydration.”

“Then do it!” He said. “F**king do it!!”

He exhaled as he said. “Mr. Shelby… I can’t go sticking a needle in her like that. My first oath is to do no harm!”

“I’m going to f**king harm you!” He roared as he took two steps towards him.

Frances got in front of him. “Mr. Shelby! Wait!” She turned and snapped. “Doctor! Do you know how to perform the treatment?”

“No!” The doctor stated. “I’d need to talk to an American doctor who’s performed this before, and I don’t know any Americans!”

“That’s what’s stopping you?” She shouted. “Talking to a f**king doctor!?”

“Yes!”

He swore violently, not caring that Rosemary was there. He stormed over to the phone and had the operator connect him to…. Luca Changretta. The phone rang forever, and the operator said. There doesn’t appear to be anyone home, Sir.

“Keep ringing.” he said firmly. “he lives in a big f**king mansion; there has to be a servant around.”

After the 20th ring, Luca picked up. Who the fuck is calling me at this hour?

He didn’t even bother with formalities. “What’s the name of your doctor?”

What? He sounded beyond confused. Tommy Shelby?

“What’s the name of your doctor?” He repeated. “I need his name and number right now.”

Luca? That was Autumn, and she sounded…as if he’d just interrupted the two of them. Is Tommy alright?

He wants the name of your doctor, my love.

Tommy? Autumn grabbed the phone. What’s going on?

“Autumn!” He snapped at her. “I can’t explain. I need the name and number of your f**king doctor right now!!”

Don’t raise your voice---

“I don’t give a f**k about my voice!!” He shouted into the phone. “Give me the f**king name before Kate f**king dies!!”

There was a silence, and Luca said. Our doctor only speaks Italian. I’m going to go call him; stay on the phone with Autumn.

“Oh, f**k.” He rubbed his eyes. “F**k.”

“What is it?” Rosemary asked.

He exhaled as he turned to her. The poor girl looked like she was dying on her feet. “It’s alright,” he inhaled. “Changretta’s doctor only speaks Italian.”

She stared. “Why!?”

“I don’t know,” he exhaled. “But Changretta is going to translate. It’s going to be alright.”

Rosemary didn’t believe him. She inhaled as she said. “I’m going to be all alone if she dies.”

She was scared. He wasn’t willing to let Kate go; that wasn’t a possibility, but he’d put one bit of Rosemary’s concerns at ease. “I’ve got her, Rosemary. If we lose her,” he inhaled as he said. “You’re safe here. You can stay here.”

She nodded and croaked. “Thank you.”

Tommy. Autumn spoke on the phone. How bad is it?

He exhaled as he said. “She has influenza. It was mild, but her fever went from 101 to 105 this evening.”

Oh god, no.

“We don’t know why.”

Did she take something? She asked. Anything that might have made it spike?

“No one knows. There’s only a cup of tea and water.” he exhaled as he said. “I just got back from Ireland. She’s been in her room for hours.”

Oh, Tommy. I’m sorry. She inhaled. Do you want us to come? I can---

“No.” he said quietly. “You and Changretta have twins coming, apparently.”

Yes. She said softly. Twins.

He was quiet a moment before speaking. “Congratulations.”

Thank you. She inhaled, and he could hear that she was crying. Kate will make it, Tommy. I know she will. She loves you.

He exhales as he says. “We don’t know that yet.”

We do. She whispered. We do. She denied it, but I could see it. When Luca knocked you out…she was so worried. The look in her eyes when you woke up…she loves you, Tommy. Her tone changed. Yes, my love! She cleared her throat. Luca has the doctor on the phone. He’s in the guest room. I’m going to give a message to the maid, who’ll give it to Luca, who’ll give it to Doctor Messina.

“Ok.” He turned to the doctor. “You’re up.”

This was a long process. Just calling New York was 75 pounds. Then, an additional 3 pounds per minute. It was a 35-minute phone call as Luca’s doctor explained the process to his doctor. The doctor wrote down the instructions, and when it was done, the call cost him just over 180 pounds. The doctor hurried downstairs to go and get what he needed to get Kate set up with an intravenous drip. He didn’t have everything, so he’d have to go and get some things. At that moment Johnny, Daiena, and Zilpha Lee all showed up at the same time.

He exhaled. “I’ve got to go. Johnny Dogs, his wife, and Zilpha Lee just showed up.”

"Tommy," Autumn asked again. Are you sure that you don’t want us to come?

“Yeah,” he exhaled as he said. “I’ll send you guys a telegram if anything changes.”

Call. Luca said. Autumn will be worried, and I don’t care about the cost. This one’s on us.

“No.” he said firmly. “I don’t pay for your wife anymore. You’ll let me pay for Kate.”

There was a moment’s silence, and then Luca said. Alright. Go to her. We’ll talk later.

“Goodbye.”

He exhaled and turned back to Kate’s body. Johnny shook his head as Johnny’s wife put a black madonna around Kate’s neck. “She’s burning up, Tom. Burning up.”

“I know.” Zilpha already had a thermometer back in Kate’s mouth. She frowned as she grabbed Kate’s glass of water. She passed it to Daiena, who nodded. “What is it?”

“Queen Anne’s lace.” Zilpha said. “Is she pregnant?”

He shook his head, his head reeling. “No. Not to my knowledge.”

“Kate’s not married.” Rosemary hiccuped. “S-she can’t get pregnant unless she’s married.”

All the adults shared a look, and Johnny nodded. “Right, how about you and me go check on Charlie? Think he’s awake with all this racket?”

“I’m not leaving, Kate.” Rosemary said.

“Go on, child.” Zilpha said. “We have to change her anyway.”

She looked to Thomas and said. “He can’t be in here then.”

“Mr. Shelby has to help us get her in and out of the bed. It’s alright in an emergency. Your sister would understand.”

“I’ll have my eyes closed,” he assured Rosemary. “I won’t look at her.”

“You better not!”

Johnny led her out of the room. Johnny. He said in Romani. Try to get her to sleep. It’ll be a long night.

Johnny nodded. I’ll put something in her tea.

That wasn’t what he meant, but it’s all he had right now. The moment the door shut, the ladies whipped the covers back and pushed Kate’s gown up to her waist. He moved to stand by her head as they examined her. They pushed her legs apart and examined her. She didn’t even stir. He knew she had to be out. Because if she were anywhere near being alive, she’d have kicked them in the face.

“No signs of her body getting rid of the baby.” Zilpha said, causing him to turn towards them.

“Maybe she didn’t drink enough?”

“Didn’t drink enough what?” He asked.

“Queen Anne’s Lace.” Daiena explained. “It helps a woman get rid of the baby.”

His heart stopped as he asked. “Is she…is she pregnant?”

Zilpha nodded. “Yes. She appears to---

“How long?” He asked. “How f**king far…is she?”

Daiena exhaled as she said. “Six weeks.”

Six weeks.

He thought back. That was some time back in January. But they hadn’t been sleeping together until the 31st, when she started going out with Declan. He’d gotten her pregnant that day, a day when he’d been half out of his mind with jealousy as he thought about Declan touching her. Probably when he had her pinned against the wall in the stables. Oh, he’d taken her hard that day. So f**king hard. She’d been screaming the entire time. He never told her to stop. He wanted to hear her scream. She could have screamed the whole f**king barn down, and he wouldn’t have cared. The way she’d held him, the way they talked to each other afterwards—it had been a good day to create a baby. God, she deserved to have a baby.

But the queen Anne’s lace. She had a doctor visit; had she known she was pregnant? Had she taken the Queen Anne’s lace, and had it caused her to have a reaction? Could that have spiked her fever? He turned away from Kate and went straight to the phone. He called the Garrison, and Billy picked up. Hello?

“Billy,” he inhaled. “Are you closed up?”

Just sending out the last few customers, Mr. Shelby.

“Anyone sober?”

Yes, several men. Why?

“Go have them pick up Lizzie Stark. Have them take her to Charlie’s yard and hold her there till the morning.” He hung up before he had a chance to answer any more questions about Lizzie. He knew there’d be questions. Lizzie had been with the Shelby family for years. So this…it would lead to speculation, but he didn’t care.

He then called Lizzie. Hello? She was out of breath when she picked up. Almost as if she’d run to the phone… or someone had just finished f**king her sideways.

He was silent for a moment before asking. “Why’d you give those to Kate?”

What? She had the nerve to sound confused. Tommy, what are you talking about?

“The queen Anne’s lace.” he stated. “Why the hell did you give it to her?”

She was silent a moment, and then she said. Tommy…she didn’t know anything. She thought that she couldn’t have a baby because she had a---

“Why’d you f**king give it to her?!” He demanded. Lizzie went still on the other end. “It was none of your f**king business!”

Tommy, she exhaled. I doubt that you wanted her to get pregnant---

“i did.” he said harshly. “You told her that I was in love with her. Is there any reason why I wouldn’t want her pregnant? Especially since I know that she lost a baby of her own? She wanted to have a baby, to be a f**king mother and you…you just interfered in a matter that was none of your f**king concern!!”

Tommy---

“None of your f**king business!” He stated hoarsely. “You’re not family, Lizzie.”

I’m like family! She stated. I’ve been here for years. I gave up…everything for you! I gave up An---

“Angel Changretta?” He said. “That makes you the bigger fool. He’s dead. He’s gone. You should have gone to him in the first place if you loved him that f**king much.”

Tommy---

“But you loved me more.” He said harshly. “Or so you thought you did. The point is, Lizzie…I don’t love you. Never did. You know this. And you,” he exhaled. “You crossed a line. You f**king crossed a line, and you crossed it with her.”

Tommy, I didn’t know that you wanted a baby with her---

“I don’t care. Right now… She’s in my bed, with a fever of 105.”

What? Tommy, queen Anne’s lace---

“You should have never given it to her,” he said lowly. “If she dies…I’m killing you.”

She exhaled sharply. Tommy. You can’t mean that.

“I do. I f**king do. She has my child in her. If she dies, I lose them both.” He inhaled as he heard the doors to Lizzie’s house break open with a crash.

She screamed. Tommy!!

“If she dies…you die,” he inhaled before adding. “John’ll put the final bullet in your head.”

Someone grabbed the phone. Mr. Shelby. She’s not alone.

He inhaled as he asked. “Who is she with?”

Declan Walsh.

He shouldn’t be surprised, but he was. After calling Kate a whore, Declan Walsh had gone to Lizzie’s bed. “Take him too, and if he resists, take care of him.”

Yes, Mr. Shelby.

He hung up and turned back to Kate, who was still struggling to break this fever of hers. He moved to the head of the bed and held her hand. He ran his hand through her hair. If he lost her, he was losing everything. His future wife. Their future child. He’d be all alone again, and this time, no one would be able to put him together again. It'd be a bullet for him in the end because he didn't want to go on living without her.

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 24 of Kate & Tommy