again we light our fires

by The_Capricious_One

Summary:

For almost three decades, Emmrich Volkarin has made himself available to unbonded omegas going through heats.

He gets a lot more than he bargained for when Rook shows up at his door.

Notes:

An omegaverse premise BIT ME and now it's time to do my spin on A/B/O dynamics. My spin is, apparently, soft. So soft. Can't say I've ever seen that before! Bon appetit.

Chapter 1

The door to Professor Volkarin's office was an ornate thing, dark and heavy oak carved with a riot of vines, leaves, and flowers. In a curious departure from his colleagues, his gold name plate was simple, his name surrounded by barely any scrollwork.

Rook knocked, her heart pounding at double speed.

"One moment!" came a faint, muffled voice.

In the long, agonizing moments before the door opened, Rook locked her knees and wrestled down the urge to flee.

The man that opened the door was tall. Rook tilted her head back a little more, compensating for an unexpected extra four inches of height. He also older than she'd assumed, his silver-streaked hair immaculate. His body was adorned with grave gold. A lot of grave gold.

Five hundred demons, Haelwic, you didn't tell me he was handsome.

A strong chin, a sharp jaw, prominent cheekbones, lovely dark eyes under hooded eyelids…

The undignified part of her, already so close to the surface, promptly sat up and started begging. Tall, prestigious career, rich, put together, in the prime of his life— this man wasn't just some alpha—he was a ridiculously desirable alpha.

Professor Volkarin's nostrils flared as he inhaled, and he blinked. Rook caught a wave of interest from him, before he quickly pushed his body language and expression back to neutrality. It was stupidly refreshing, after almost a fortnight of dealing with pushy, overbearing alphas every time Rook left the house.

"Professor Emmrich Volkarin, at your service," Professor Volkarin said. "Can I be of assistance?"

"Rook. I've been told that you make certain... arrangements," Rook said uncomfortably.

Professor Volkarin took her meaning immediately. "Would you like to have this conversation here, in my office, or somewhere else? Perhaps the Memorial Garden, if you preferred somewhere more public, or the sitting room of my quarters..."

"Here is fine," Rook said. Her face burned at the thought of having this conversation in public.

And, thankfully, Professor Volkarin's office seemed far more soundproofed than any place Rook had ever worked.

Professor Volkarin invited her in with a gesture, vacating the doorway so that she wouldn't have to squeeze past him, a courtesy that Rook deeply appreciated. Rook shut the door behind herself and settled into the comfortable leather armchair across from him. He sat behind his desk, hands folded in his lap. His posture was carefully non-threatening, open: attentively listening.

Enveloped in the closed space of his office, it became extremely obvious that Professor Volkarin took care to keep his natural scent as low as possible, letting his fresh and spicy cologne make far more of an impression than his natural pheromones. It was a surprisingly thoughtful touch, something his students would doubtless appreciate. Right now, though, Rook found herself wanting to press her face against him and inhale like a poorly trained dog. Every alpha she scented this week made her perk up and take notice, but Professor Volkarin smelled obscenely good. It was worse than being inside a bakery after a twenty-mile march on no food.

Desire bubbled up, hot and strong, and ugh, Rook could not wait until this stupid bleedthrough got stemmed. She picked restlessly at a thread on her jacket, avoiding Professor Volkarin’s eyes.

“A friend told me that you sometimes help unbonded omegas through their heats. Is that right, Professor?”

“Please, call me Emmrich,” he said. “And yes, I do.”

"I've been suppressing my heats for years, but it's starting to bleed through even the highest dose the apothecary will give me," Rook explained. "It's probably going to trigger soon, even through the suppressor, and..."

Rook trailed off, not wanting to admit what was patently obvious: she had no one to turn to.

She watched Emmrich out of the corner of her eye. His face flickered with something.

“Suppressants do tend to fail when used for many consecutive years,” Emmrich said, his voice very carefully neutral. “If it eases your mind, once you have dispatched this incipient heat—and there will be no getting around this one, I’m afraid, you already appear to be within a week of estrus, if not sooner—”

Spirits, she’d never met someone who talked like a textbook before. How did Haelwic know this guy?

“—the suppressant should return to operating as expected. Red witchweed is known to be effective for the longest, I believe. It may be sufficient to stave off your next heat for as much as fifteen years.”

Rook’s mouth twisted with something that didn’t feel much like humor. “That’s the one I take.”

Emmrich absorbed that. After a moment of hesitation, he nodded, clearly discarding something he wanted to say.

“I make myself available for comfort, not for necessity,” Emmrich said. “It’s perfectly safe to go through a heat alone, even if it is not an easy thing to do. By all accounts, it’s not any different refraining from eating for a day or two—deeply uncomfortable, but causing no lasting damage. And when it comes to comfort, there are lesser options for everything. Being accompanied by an alpha’s scent alone is enough to reduce distress.”

Rook brightened at that. It could be that simple?

“Having a beta or omega partner to ease the ache likewise makes things far more tolerable,” Emmrich continued. “If you do indeed to choose to have me present, there are still an array of options. There are ways to improve the experience dramatically without ever taking a knot. I make a point of discussing the appropriate logistics as far in advance of the heat as possible.”

Rook’s mouth went dry at the thought of taking his knot. It was matched by getting immediately and very uncomfortably wet. Ugh, she’d hit the point where he could definitely smell her, unless he were completely nose-blind. Rook mentally added the humiliation to the hundreds of other reasons she wished she were a bloody beta instead, and tried to stuff the thoughts down.

“Wait, you can stop yourself from knotting me? When I’m in full heat?” Rook asked incredulously.

“Oh yes, certainly,” Emmrich said, with enough casual confidence that Rook’s stomach fluttered. “I could, in fact, remain clothed for the entire duration, if you so wished. The impairment is not greater than a night of heavy drinking, or perhaps a day without sleep. That judgement is compromised is inevitable, but it doesn’t necessitate poor behavior. I believe in treating people well. I don’t stop respecting their choices when my intellectual function is impaired.”

At the shocked look on her face, Emmrich’s smile took on a sardonic edge. “Yes, I’m afraid many of my fellows make excuses for some very poor behavior indeed. It’s a social phenomenon, not a biological one. They take liberties they feel entitled to get away with, rather than responding to a fundamental urge.”

He reflected a moment. “Well, apart from the rather crude desire to—ahem.”

A faint blush bloomed on his cheeks. Rook watched with an interest that felt decidedly predatory. His embarrassment was sweet. It was tempting to tell him filthy jokes until she found out just how red he could get.

“What I mean to say is that being an alpha does not make us animals,” Emmrich said. “There is always a choice. And it’s not so hard a one to make, when you come down to it.”

“Oh,” Rook said quietly.

Emmrich didn’t immediately speak again, letting her process.

To Rook’s shock, she realized that she actually believed him. The solid confidence of his voice felt so different from the bragging of other alphas she’d known. Not only did he know it was possible, he’d already done it.

He’d already treated her better than any alpha she’d met in the past two weeks—and the quiet, calm way he did it suggested that it wasn’t just a façade he kept up just long enough to get past her guard. Maybe… just maybe…

Rook swallowed, hard, and screwed up her courage.  

“Would you be able to be gentle? Even when I’m…”

Rook’s throat tightened to the point she couldn’t finish her question.

Emmrich’s face softened. “Yes, my dear. That won’t be a problem. The effect of heat pheromones doesn’t inherently give rise to any cruel or aggressive urges. I personally find that I am compelled more towards protectiveness and caring than to callousness.”

“Oh,” Rook said, in an even smaller voice. To her shame, tears threatened.

Emmrich leaned over the desk, and took her hand gently.

“You no doubt have reasons for avoiding a heat for so long,” he said quietly. “You need not explain them to me; my only request is that you tell me if there are any actions I should avoid. It doesn't matter what they are—places you do not wish to be touched, words you do not want said, a dislike of being pinned or cornered, anything—I will not pry, or ask for any justification. That it discomfits you is more than enough.”

Rook’s chest squeezed. She closed her eyes. A tear trickled out anyway, itching on her cheek.

“Sorry,” Rook choked out. “Um, ignore this, it's nothing, I—I’d stop if I could—"

Rook’s throat closed, and to her humiliation, the tears only came harder.

Emmrich put his other hand on top of hers, enveloping Rook's fingers in warmth.

“You need not be embarrassed on my account,” Emmrich said softly. “Tears are not weakness, my dear. They are, more often than not, an expression of pain. And the world is not short on things to hurt us.”

Rook scrubbed the trail of tears away with the back of her free hand, embarrassed. She nodded without looking at him.

“Please don’t ask me to get on my knees,” she said.

“Understood.”

He squeezed her hand. Rook was torn between the animal comfort of it, and the surge of raw desire from feeling just how large and strong his hands were. Oof, her heat was close.

How handsome he was really, really didn’t help matters.

“You mentioned logistics,” Rook said.

She mentally begged him to ignore the lingering tears, without much hope. To her eternal frustration, alphas always seemed to react to her crying with stupid, ineffective posturing, unable to handle their own discomfort. They never seemed to care if it made Rook feel better.

“Yes. Firstly: what sort of assistance would you like from me?”

“All of it,” Rook’s traitor mouth said before she could consider.

Her cheeks warmed. The idea of hiding herself away with something that smelled of Emmrich had been incredibly appealing. But she had to admit: given the excuse to sleep with someone as hot as him—well. She’d made much worse decisions for much smaller temptations.

She became suddenly aware that he was still holding her hand. The gesture had felt so comforting, so kindly and earnestly meant, it hadn’t registered that he was a stranger, and that it’d probably be…weird… if it went on for much longer. Despite every fiber of her being protesting, she pulled back.

Emmrich simply nodded. “You’ll need to begin drinking a contraceptive tea as soon as possible, if you haven’t already. I can arrange for it today—or I can direct you to an apothecary who can do so.”

“Oh,” Rook said, surprised. “Um. Right, that makes sense. Let me know where to pick it up.”

She realized belatedly that arranging it himself was probably a point of alpha pride, regardless of how inconvenient the logistics were. But Emmrich, somehow, didn’t bristle. He scribbled a name, address, and a medicine onto a scrap of parchment—if such an elegant script could ever be called scribbling.

“I’ll also bring a magical artifact as secondary, barrier-based contraception, so you needn’t worry on that account,” Emmrich said. “Beyond that, the most pressing items are simply a matter of boundaries. Would you prefer to go unknotted, or to be knotted?”

“I—” Rook hesitated. “I don’t know.”

“Do you think you would regret doing so?” Emmrich asked, head cocked. “It truly would be no issue to refrain.”

Rook shook her head. “I’m just…intimidated.”

“We can leave that open to how you feel in the moment, then,” Emmrich said. “Where would you like to meet? I can point you to several discreet hotels, if you wish to look them over.”

Emmrich looked like a man who stayed in hotels that would cost as much as three months of her rent. And going to his home—well. It’d probably leave Rook feeling just as out of place and awkward as a fancy hotel. Being in heat was already going to be miserable enough.

Her home, maybe?

Something inside her, the part that had been getting louder since the suppressants failed, voiced visceral, aggressive approval. She locked her muscles against a sudden, strong urge to drag him all the way back home with her and hide him away like a raptor mantling over a juicy kill. If she made sure nobody else saw him, he’d be hers—

“My place is fine,” Rook said casually, and wrote down the address for him.

“Is there anything you’d like to know from me? Anything that would make you feel more comfortable?” Emmrich asked.

Rook eyed him, dozens of nosy questions at the tip of her tongue.

Why hasn’t someone snapped you up yet??

That, Rook conceded, was far too personal a question for a stranger about to grant her a huge favor. She shook her head.

“Any other things that you would prefer I do, or not do?” Emmrich asked.

“I… don’t know,” Rook said. She gave him a wry smile. “I mean, except—you know how some alphas act like being an omega makes you an idiot, like, not even as capable as a kid? Not that. I’m very fucking good at what I do, it’s honestly just embarrassing how wrong they are.”

Rook caught another flicker of interest from Emmrich, even stronger than when he’d first scented her, before he hastily tamped it down.

Huh.

“That’s easily done,” Emmrich said. “Anything else?”

The faint scent of his pheromones had gotten stronger, a clear response her presence. A base part of her thrilled at his obvious reactions. Beneath that polite, respectful behavior, he wanted her.

It took all of Rook’s willpower not to lean in. He smelled so good…

“Um, no,” Rook said, not really remembering the question.

“I’ll make sure to check in on you in a few days. If you reconsider any of your decisions before our meeting, or have more requests for me, please let me know.”

He stood, accompanying her politely to the door—even though it was barely five feet away. Rook’s lips twitched. It was the first sign he’d given that her impending heat was impairing his thinking. As far as idiocy went, that was pretty charming, if silly.

His eyes lingered on her; it was clear, although he did nothing, that he did not want her to go.

Rook blew him a kiss as she left. Emmrich took the little flirtation with obvious startlement, his face blank with shock.

The slow, delighted smile that crept across his face as he shut the door after her warmed Rook for hours.

Notes:

normally I start publishing after I have way more of the story ready to go but... you know what, just this once, I'm gonna let chaos win. I've been writing this thing nonstop for three weeks I have GOT to start sharing or I will start biting.

come say hi over on tumblr! I'm there as rauferes. There are a bunch of previews for this fic already up there... ;)

Chapter 2

Rook woke four days later having already soaked through her sleep clothes. Before she’d fully come to consciousness, the restlessness hit her, her skin prickling all over.

She sat up, pushing her hair out of her face, and immediately panicked.

Shit, what do I—I can’t just go wandering through the Necropolis like this to get him—

Nervous energy pushed her up and out of bed immediately anyway. She changed into clothes, and then changed three more times, thinking about Emmrich seeing her in them, and then got distracted cleaning her apartment, again. It was already nicer than it’d ever been before, probably even cleaner than when she moved in. But every time she paced another restless circuit, she saw something else yelling for her attention.

Over an hour of grout scrubbing, window washing, upholstery deep cleaning, and panicked dithering later, there was a knock on the door.

Oh, thank the Maker, he came on his own. Somehow.

But when Rook opened the door, it was to find a random alpha standing there. He had sandy hair, wide shoulders, a broad jaw, and was a bit plain. The faint, clean smell of his sweat triggered a frankly embarrassing amount of interest from her.

They had definitely never met before. She stared at him, not understanding what she was seeing.

His nostrils flared, and he put on what probably would’ve passed for a charming smile, if Rook hadn’t, at that moment, realized that she shouldn’t have opened the door.

“Hey, you doing alright?”

“Fine,” Rook said flatly.

The alpha nodded absently at that. “You, uh, need any help?”

“No,” Rook said, and crossed her arms.

The alpha’s gaze dropped immediately to her breasts, but to his credit, he looked back at her face immediately.

“You sure? Food run, extra blankets or pillows, tell your boss you won’t be in…” he offered.

Rook’s shoulders relaxed a fraction. For a second she considered asking him to run messenger to Emmrich… no, that might not be a wise thing to ask another alpha to do.

A little less guardedly she said, “No, I’m set.”

“Alright,” the alpha said. He bit his lip. It was clear he didn’t want to leave. “I could, uh, check in later today. If you wanted.”

“I don’t,” Rook said, unobligingly.

“Right. Okay,” he said, clearly disappointed.

Just that moment, a faint waft of Emmrich’s cologne came down the hallway. Rook’s heartbeat picked up immediately.

The stranger moved away from her door, obviously understanding there was nothing left for him to try, and just as clearly wracking his brains for anything, anything else. He took several steps away, hesitated, and wilted a little at Rook’s unimpressed look. He made his way back down the hall.

Emmrich strode into view then, carrying a large, woven basket and a small suitcase. There was a frozen moment when the pair sized each other up.

Emmrich looked past the other alpha, catching sight of Rook at the door. He took in her body language. Some of the tension went out of his shoulders.

“Good morning,” Emmrich said politely—if a bit stiffly—to the man.

“Morning,” the man said, his posture drooping just a bit more with disappointment.

Despite Emmrich’s courtesy, the hair at the base of his neck was distinctly hackled. Rook hid a smile behind her hand.

And then Emmrich was close enough for his warm, spicy scent to envelop her, and the rest of the world fell away. There could have been a demon standing two doors down in the hallway, and Rook wouldn’t have noticed.

“Good morning, Rook,” Emmrich greeted her warmly. “I had a feeling today might be the day, although I’ll admit to not being certain when you’d wake… Would you still like my assistance?”

Rook swallowed. It was hard to stand where she was; everything in her wanted to wrap herself around him, kiss him senseless, tear his crisp, tailored clothing off him... But fear was rising up, sharp and sickly. What if she’d misjudged everything? What if he was just as aggressive and vicious as the worst alphas she’d met, just better at hiding it? What if she let him in and he—

Emmrich put a hand on hers—calming. Platonic. It didn’t even have the hint of possessiveness she associated with most alphas.

“I’ve brought a few items with my scent, if you’ve changed your mind,” he said gently. “I can leave you with those, along with food and water.”

His hand was bare of rings. Rook’s belly lurched. There was no reason he’d need to take his rings off, unless he was planning to take those long elegant fingers and—

“Come in,” Rook said.

Emmrich gave her a small, pleased smile, and stepped inside.

Everything in her apartment suddenly shifted in scale next to Emmrich. Rook was generally used to being one of the shortest people in any given room, but this was ridiculous. The top of her head wasn’t even level with his shoulder. He was so tall that he made everything around him look smaller.

Her body screamed with awareness of his—he was a height that only alphas reached, in a way that made it hard to think of anything other than his large hands on her, his body bowed over hers.

“You’re so. Big,” Rook told him inanely.

Emmrich chuckled, and Rook’s belly squeezed.

“Maker, that was such a stupid thing to say,” Rook said, embarrassed.

“A heat is not known for generating intellectual thoughts,” Emmrich said delicately.

Ugh, he was so smart, and that was hot too. Rook couldn’t stop the possessive growl that escaped her. She winced. Even betas found that kind of thing a turn-off. Good little omegas didn’t do that.

If I wanted to get growled at, I’d have bagged an alpha bitch, a beta fling had told her sourly, right before she kicked them out.

There was an apology on her lips, an embarrassed excuse that the heat was making it hard to behave like a normal person, when Emmrich’s eyes flashed with dark approval.

Oh fuck, he liked that.

“Some refreshments for later,” Emmrich said lightly, and passed her the basket.

Rook cracked the lid, peeking inside. There was a decadent abundance of food, fine sausages and plump grapes, wrapped bundles marked with a bakery’s stamp, a mouthwatering, crusty loaf of bread, a variety of drinks in elegant glass bottles, and a generous amount of water. Laid above them all was a modest bouquet of flowers. Rook rubbed the silken petal of a lily, and felt an emotion too large for her chest shove all her organs into disarray.

“That—wow. Thanks,” Rook said shakily.

She placed the gift basket on her kitchen counter, and twitched with the urge to do—something. Make a shrine out of it, maybe.

Rook turned back to Emmrich and licked her lips. His gazed dropped to her mouth, ensnared, before looking back into her eyes. Desire felt molten in her belly.

“Are you hungry?” Rook asked abruptly.

“Not at the moment,” Emmrich said.

Rook suppressed a pang of disappointment. The idea of feeding him had felt strangely hopeful.

“Bedroom’s over there, bathroom is on the right. You can set down your things, if you like,” Rook offered.

Emmrich nodded, and disappeared into her bedroom.

Rook unearthed a vase from a forgotten, spiderweb ridden corner, and arranged the flowers. With nothing left to do, she paced and jittered. There were a set of tiny stains that had been hidden between the wall and the counter, how had she missed those? She picked restlessly at the seam of her blouse, narrowly resisting the urge to take out the cleaning supplies, again.

Emmrich reappeared, and gave her a lingering appraisal that made Rook simultaneously tense up and want to climb him like a tree. She took a jerky step forward, stopped. Shifted her weight from foot to foot, too restless to be still. She wanted, very badly, to touch him. But something just as strong was screaming at her not to get within arm’s reach.

“What would put you more at ease?” Emmrich asked gently.

“I don’t know,” Rook said, restless and frustrated. “I—how does this usually go?”

“Forget usual. What do you need?” Emmrich asked.

“I—” a small, frustrated noise tore out of Rook’s throat.

Emmrich came closer, a hand out. Rook flinched without meaning to, the fear spiking.

“I don’t want to take my clothes off yet,” she blurted out.

Emmrich stepped back, hastily tucking his hand behind his back. In a soothing voice he said, “Of course. You’ll let me know when, and not before.”

There was an awkward pause. Emmrich looked at her helplessly. There was clear longing written into every line of his body language, a desire to come closer—but against all her expectations, it wasn’t that he wanted to bed her.

He wanted to comfort her.

Not even Rook was sure how to do that. The prickling discomfort of her whole body felt magnified by his presence, as if her bones were vibrating at an unpleasant pitch. But despite how badly she wanted him, actually approaching him felt like trying to cut off her own arm.

Rook wracked her brains for what to do.

“Would you like to sit?”

She gestured to her couch. For the first time in about a year and a half, the decorative cushions matched.

“Certainly,” Emmrich said with relief, and settled himself in. After a moment he added, “What lovely cushions.”

Rook could feel the nervous tension cut in half as soon as he was seated. He wasn’t just some unknown alpha who’d come barging into her home to order her around and throw her down and have his way with her. He was her guest, accepting her hospitality.

If she maybe felt a strong surge of smug possessiveness at that thought of a handsome, stupidly elegant alpha enjoying her home—a stupid level of emotion that was probably more appropriate for a hoarding dragon than for a human being—she could just. Ignore that. Not important. No one needed to know.

She’d been intending to sit across from him in an armchair, but impulsively, Rook found herself plopping down directly next to him on the sofa. Her leg jiggled aggressively. He was too close. And yet somehow, he was also too far away.

She wanted to touch him so badly…

“An arm over your shoulders?” Emmrich asked, observing her.

“Please,” Rook said hastily.

He settled an arm around her, warm and solid.

An unexpected feeling of safety crashed over Rook like a wave. Rook’s body collapsed against him.

“Oh,” she said breathlessly.

The apprehension fell away, the unpleasant, vibrating energy evaporating. She buried her face against his side. He was so warm. So good smelling. Her arms snaked around his waist. Rook pulled long breaths through her nose, feeling dizzy and strangely fulfilled.   

Emmrich’s head turned, and a soft sound came from deep in his throat. His breath mirrored hers, deep, unhurried inhales. The alert, tense watchfulness that he’d displayed from the moment he’d first spotted her relaxed into something far more at ease. His thumb stroked her side, gentle.

The fear subsided, her body slowly loosening.

Right up until she caught the way that his tailored trousers were straining.

“Is this… okay?” Rook asked uncertainly.

“You need not be worried on my account,” Emmrich assured her. His voice had gone deeper; Rook shivered. “I am here for what you need.”

“I don't want to make you— if you only were here for sex, we can—"

“Not at all,” Emmrich said gently. “I'm in no rush, my dear.”

Her eyes darted, despite themselves, to his lap.

“Everything about you right now is an… extremely powerful physiological stimulant,” Emmrich said delicately. “But that does not make me incapable of savoring the moment.”

“Still. You’d tell me if you didn’t like it?” Rook asked.

“I can do that. But you realize the desires of an omega are mirrored by those of an alpha, yes? The baser parts of me are rather greedily enjoying this.”

He stroked up and down her side with a light touch, and she moaned, melting against him.

“To be such an obvious source of comfort, right as your scent is pushing my instincts to be maximally protective, maximally solicitous... to be frank, it’s a bit humiliating just how much it impacts me.”

He gave her an embarrassed smile that made her heart squeeze.

“Oh,” Rook said.

Another gentle stroke of his hand. A shudder went through her, all the tension in her body leaving at once. Emmrich let out a long breath—almost a sigh—and his body loosened, too. They sat quietly.

Urges to straddle him, to pull down his snug trousers and have him crashed over Rook in waves, and she pushed them back. She savored the warmth that radiated from him, the faint musky scent of his skin that smelled, at the moment, absolutely intoxicating. She almost wished that he’d forgone his lovely cologne, so that she could be wrapped in nothing but the scent of him. It had been deliciously tempting in his office, but here, mixing with the familiar smells of her own home, it was driving her insane. She rubbed her cheek against him, greedy with the idea of her scent intermixing with his.

After a while Emmrich lifted her, gently, and settled her on his lap. It was perfectly demure—her thighs over his, not straddling him, not even near his erection. The effect on Rook’s body was electric anyway. The casual strength of how he moved her, the easy, assertive alpha confidence… Rook held back an embarrassing sound by sheer force of will. Heat pooled low in her belly.

Emmrich wrapped his arms around her, and Rook lost the fight against moaning. He was so massive that his embrace swallowed her up. Her whole body lit up with it, a simple, uncomplicated joy. Rook buried her face against his neck. Emmrich let out a soft sigh, and rested his chin on the top of her head. He stroked the length of her back.

A hard shiver went down Rook’s spine.

“Alright?” Emmrich asked quietly.

“Good,” Rook said, and was too far gone to care that her voice sounded so wrecked.

Emmrich made a noise at the back of his throat, and buried his nose in her hair. “You smell divine.”

Rook knew it meant nothing—smelling good to alphas was just what a heat was—but something hot lurched in her stomach anyway.

“So soft,” he mumbled, quietly enough that she wasn’t sure he meant to speak.

He stroked her back some more and she groaned, wrapping herself fully in him. Rook’s whole body had gone loose; only Emmrich was keeping her upright. She listened to the sound of him breathing, contented.

After a while, Emmrich rearranged them on the couch, guiding Rook to lie down. He kept Rook securely enveloped in his arms. Rook let out a happy sigh, immediately nuzzling in closer to his neck. She threw a leg over his hips.

He let out a short breath; suddenly his erection was pressed against her lower stomach.

Rook froze, stiffening with alarm. Her eyes darted down. There was a faint wet spot on his trousers. Oh fuck, he was already leaking. She’d already tested his patience, and he definitely wasn’t going to wait any longer. Her breath went short. Fear was cold and sharp in her throat. He was going to—going to—

“Rook?” Emmrich asked, concerned.

Emmrich stroked her back, a gentle motion that was clearly meant to soothe her, stopping well short of the curve of her arse. He didn’t do anything else—didn’t even grind against her.

Rook shuddered. Her muscles unlocked, just a little, but refused to relax.

“I just got surprised,” Rook said, embarrassed. “It always, um, went a lot faster than I liked. Before.”

“We'll go slow,” Emmrich promised. “I need never take my trousers off, if you prefer it. My presence alone, or perhaps my mouth or fingers, could take the worst edge off.”

Rook made a strangled little sound, her leg clamping tighter around him. Emmrich’s eyelids fluttered, and he let out a low, soft moan. His cock twitched, and Rook suddenly went from wet to soaked.

Her breath came embarrassingly fast.

“I really do want you to fuck me. I’ve been thinking about it since—”

Rook’s mouth clicked shut, managing to cut off the words since we met. A blush burned her cheeks.

A subtle tension went out of Emmrich.

“That can be arranged,” he said playfully.

True to his word, he didn’t follow up on her obvious arousal, subsiding into a peaceful embrace again. It was so warm, so soothing in his arms. Slowly, her body relaxed again. Rook closed her eyes, feeling like a cat purring at full volume.

“Oh,” Rook said, very quietly, her voice shivery.

Emmrich’s breath caught. He stroked her hair, and Rook leaned into it.

The urge to remove their clothes, to feel Emmrich’s warm skin pressed against hers, rose up again and again, but Rook was so content where she was that she resisted. She didn’t want to end the moment: their legs tangled together, her face was buried into the crook of his neck, luxuriating in the feeling of his cheek against her temple.

Rook’s tension unwound more, and more. It felt better than a hot bath at the end of a very, very long day.

A contented rumbling sound came from deep in Emmrich’s chest.

The sound tore through her like a sword. Rook’s mouth opened, her head tilting. Her teeth were half an inch from his neck when she abruptly remembered that he wasn’t hers to mark.

She swallowed, blushing hard.

Were there other things she shouldn’t do?

“I just realized that you asked me, but I never asked you. Are there things you don’t want done?” Rook asked.

“Ah—yes, actually. I’d rather not be scratched, if you can avoid it,” Emmrich admitted, embarrassment coloring his voice. “Sensitive back, you know.”

Rook’s brain short circuited. The simple confidence of his voice suggested that Rook losing her mind with pleasure under him were a foregone conclusion—inevitable.

“Right, sure,” Rook said, her voice a little too high pitched. “I’ll do my best.”

That earned her a warm smile that did positively lethal things to his kind eyes. Rook’s belly lurched.

“Would it be alright if I kissed you?” she asked.

His eyelids lowered, something soft entering his expression. “Certainly.”

Rook leaned in, tentative, and brushed her mouth to his. Feather-light, it felt like all the hope and warmth of a ray of sunlight on an early spring day. Rook found that she couldn’t pull back; one kiss turned into two, to three, to many. They kissed slowly, softly. Emmrich’s large, warm hand crept up to her cheek. He sighed, content, and tilted his head to a better angle. Rook buried her hands in his hair.

Gradually, the kiss got deeper, messier. The motion of his firm lips set her on fire. When she explored the shape of his mouth with her tongue, Emmrich responded instantly, brushing his tongue to hers, a quick flick that felt almost like a caress.

It sparked a feeling that Rook had never felt before. She let out an embarrassing little whine.

Emmrich growled low in his throat. He rolled them abruptly, his weight settling between her legs, pressing her under him.

And then he kissed her so passionately that Rook’s brain whited out.

Their tongues tangled together, hungry, filthy. Rook shoved her hands under the neat tuck of his shirt, eager to feel his skin. The fabric came half undone, trailing over her. Emmrich nipped her bottom lip, and Rook gasped, arching up against him. Emmrich groaned, low and quiet, and his hips ground forward minutely. He caught himself, and very deliberately went still. There was a stiffness in the muscles at the base of his spine as he held himself back. Rook rubbed there. Emmrich gave a deep groan, a shiver going down his back. Rook’s fingertips caught the intimate little flutter of it; her heart twisted with something indescribable.

He kissed her like he’d been born to do it. The warmth of his wide mouth, the perfect pressure, the breathtaking confidence, the firm weight of him pinning her to the couch—Rook lost herself completely.

When breathlessness forced them to part, Rook made a little sound of loss. She buried her face against his chest and breathed in deep. Her hands were restless against his back, stroking every inch of him that she could reach. The smooth fabric wasn’t enough; she needed his skin, all of it, pressed against her.

Emmrich responded with a light, sensual touch trailing down her side. The speed of it made her feel, for the first time in her life, like she wasn’t being pawed over.

Rook shuddered, clutching him closer.

“Please,” she said in a broken voice.

“You’re so impossibly sweet,” Emmrich said. His smooth voice was hoarsened, low and strained. “In full heat, and yet more distracted by cuddling than my cock.”

“Oh, I’m distracted by it,” Rook assured him breathlessly.

Emmrich let out a sound between a growl and a groan, and Rook, somehow, got even wetter. By the flare of his nostrils, this wasn’t lost on Emmrich. His lips curled up, and he rolled his hips against hers.

Rook cried out, hips jerking in an uncontrollable response.

“Such tempting little noises,” Emmrich purred.

He ground down so that his cock pressed directly against her clit. Rook whimpered, bucking up. The whisper of his body heat through their clothes left her frantic.

“Emmrich,” she said, desperate and wanting.

His hair was disheveled from her hands, a lock of it falling over his forehead. He was so unfairly edible looking, she wanted him so much—

A flare of heat went over Emmrich’s face. He breathed slowly, muscles tense all over, and visibly restrained himself.

“Too fast, darling? Should we back up?” Emmrich asked.

"Fine, good, great," Rook said. "Um, I think I’ve soaked through your pants.”

He laughed— a low, breathless sound that takes her insides and squeezed them. “So you have.”

His fingertips curled just under her waistband, gently suggestive: wouldn’t you rather have these off?

It set off something wild in her. A strangled noise tore out of her throat, and she started ripping at his shirt, trying to tear it off by force. It wasn’t until he caught her hands that she realized what she was doing.

“Easy, easy,” he soothed her, and brought her hands to his mouth to kiss the tips of her fingers.

Rook’s breath hitched.

Emmrich leaned back slightly, efficiently unbuttoning his shirt. His weight settled low on her hips, pinning her. Rook choked, grinding up against him. He looked down at her, eyes gleaming with approval, raking over her flushed skin.

The wait for each button was torture. Every newly exposed inch of skin drove Rook wild. When he was done, Rook didn’t have the patience to wait for him to pull out of his sleeves. His broad shoulders, his lean waist, the black and silver of his hair, the subtle flex of his wiry muscles as he breathed—it was like dumping magic crystals into a spirit flame. She couldn’t remember seeing anything as attractive in her entire life. Her hands were on him immediately, pawing him approvingly, breathless. Emmrich submitted to her touch with a faint, pleased smile. Rook couldn’t hold back a little growl.

Emmrich’s face flashed with heated approval, lips parting. For a moment, Rook was sure that he would pounce and kiss her senseless. His whole body was pitched forward with the urge, like a hunting dog ready to run.

He breathed out through his nose, his muscles tense, and didn’t. He slid his sleeves off, draping his shirt over the back of Rook’s couch.   

It was impossible to miss the massive burn scar that marked his entire right side. By the light color of it, it had been seen to with magic—many spells, layered over and over each other.

For so much of a scar to remain, it must have been a horrible wound.

Emmrich stilled as Rook lay gentle fingers on the edge of it, just under his ribs.

“Does it hurt?” she asked quietly.

“Not anymore. Quite an old scar,” Emmrich said cautiously. “It’s not a particularly enjoyable tale, I’m afraid. If that’s what you’re after.”

Rook shook her head. She pressed a gentle kiss to the scarred skin, stroking it.

I’m glad you survived, she wanted to tell him, but she wasn’t sure if that was something a stranger should say.

“That’s good,” Rook said instead. “That it doesn’t hurt anymore.”

Something complicated passed over Emmrich’s face. For a brief moment, he looked undone.

Impulsively, Rook cupped his face with her hand. Emmrich breathed out shakily, blinking rapidly, and pressed a kiss against her palm. He caught her wrist, kissed it. Rook’s breath caught.

Emmrich responded by stroking her skin, delicate fingers tracing the length of her arm. He lowered his head, brushing his mouth against her beating pulse. Rook whimpered, hand fisting in his hair. He pressed slow kisses against her neck, each lingering, letting her feel the warmth of his mouth, the full weight of his attention, to every inch of her.

It was as if the room was suddenly twenty degrees hotter. Rook ripped her blouse off. She lifted herself off the couch just enough to claw at her chest wrap, undoing it rapidly.

Emmrich’s jaw went slack at the sight of her, taking in the dramatic curve of her waist and hip with something like awe.

Rook should be used to that by now. She shouldn’t care. That was the reaction she was supposed to get, wasn’t it? Wouldn’t it be worse if her body was repulsive?

Humiliation, old and acrid, burned her throat anyway.

“Yeah,” Rook said. “I always have to dress it down. Can’t get anything done otherwise, when you’ve got breeding hips.”

It came out a lot more bitter than she meant it to.

Emmrich’s gaze snapped to her face, something unreadable passing over his expression.

“Full sentences at this stage… I’m not doing my job correctly,” he said finally. “Where do you want to be touched, my dear?”

His eyes were locked on her face, with an intensity that took her breath away. One warm palm lingered suggestively on her lower stomach, waiting for her instruction.

“Gh,” Rook said incoherently. “Everywhere.”

Emmrich stroked her skin with a slowness that made Rook burn.

“I’ve never met an omega so muscular,” Emmrich murmured, caressing the planes of her belly.

Against all her expectations, he sounded pleased, as if it wasn’t another of her many failings as an omega. He seemed particularly taken with soft swells of her abs, caressing the faint outlines of them repeatedly, as if wanting to memorize them.

“I worked—hard—for—” Rook said breathlessly, voice tinged with pride. “Ah!”

His questing fingers reached her breasts. He explored them slowly, lingering.

He hadn’t looked away from her face. The intimacy of his intent eyes, locked on hers, made Rook’s face burn.

“So warm,” he murmured. “So wonderfully soft.”

He gathered a fistful of her breast and squeezed, no harder than a man testing a peach. The burst of pleasure took Rook by surprise. She whimpered, her hands curled into fists around his waistband. She didn’t even have space to be embarrassed by the sounds she was making. There was only space in her head for the thoughts please and more.

“I—don’t usually—” Rook tried to say, but he lowered his head and traced a delicate swirl against her skin with the tip of his tongue, and Rook abruptly lost the ability to speak.

Delirious desire hit her like a hammer blow. Rook scrabbled at their clothing, trying to shift it aside enough for him to enter her.

Emmrich gave a little rumble of approval. He slid his arms around her and smoothly lifted her up.

“Bed,” Emmrich said firmly. “I’m sure you don’t want to ruin this couch.”

Rook only whined, winding her legs around him, and rocked against him. Emmrich exhaled shakily, his hands tightening on her, and couldn’t help but grind back some before he caught himself. A surge of excited hunger went through Rook. Emmrich’s calm control was clearly much thinner than it appeared from the outside. She needed to undo him, wreck him, have him—

Emmrich carried to her bedroom with a pace that was barely controlled. Under Rook’s skin, a wildfire started burning.

Chapter 3

Notes:

fun fact: almost all of this fic has been written without an e key. I've had to copy paste in every single one. having to swap out for a capital e whenever emmrich comes up has been a thorn in my side...

Emmrich tossed Rook casually onto her bed. Rook’s instincts went wild at the casual strength of it. She ripped her long skirt and petticoats off, tossing them carelessly off the side of the bed, and spread her legs for him.

Emmrich’s nostrils flared. He watched her, unblinking, as he undid his belt.

“Faster, please, I need—I need—” Rook said incoherently.

 Emmrich’s lips curled up. “In good time.”

“Good time would be right now,” Rook said desperately.

Surprised delight spread over his face.

“Oh, you’re quite witty, aren’t you?” Emmrich said, pleased, as he stepped out of his trousers. “Not even a little thing like a heat could stop you.”

Rook made a sound at the back of her throat, her eyes riveted to his cock. It was as gorgeous as the rest of him, a shape that made other men look like misshapen vegetables. Thick. Flushed a deep red. Lovely veins that made her want to explore them with her tongue. He was already wet; another bead of fluid rolled down as she watched, clinging lovingly to the head in a way that made Rook want to combust. She couldn’t look away.

“Pretty,” she said, choked. “Put it in me.”

Emmrich made an approving sound, but he didn’t climb into bed with her. He reached for a large ring he’d left on her night table, and slid it most of the way down his length. With a flourishing wave of his hand, a shimmer of magic appeared around his cock.

Rook couldn’t help the way her face fell as the opaque magic hid him from sight.

“Don’t pout, my dear. While yes, normally the tea would be sufficient, erm. Well.” Emmrich went a little pink. “In my case, both precautions are necessary.”

Fertile, a deranged little voice in Rook’s head screamed. Don’t let him get away.

“What if I wanted to feel you bare?” Rook asked coyly.

Emmrich gave an approving growl, face flashing with intense desire. He blinked, and shook himself.

“That would need to be something we agreed to beforehand,” Emmrich said firmly. “Not for nothing, but a heat is quite literally the most dangerous time to play with such things.”

For a moment, Rook could think of nothing but him spilling in her. His baby planted in her belly. Holding a tiny infant with his sweet hazel eyes, a chin that promised to grow into one like his, with her nose, her mouth. The way that the warm, plump weight of them would sit in her arms, against her ribs. Emmrich’s arms around her, his chin tucked over her shoulder, as he watched their child with soft eyes…

Rook blinked, and reality came back to her, dissipating the haze of illogical, hormonal wishfulness.

“Right,” she said, embarrassed.

Emmrich crawled up the foot of the bed. There was something burning hot in his eyes as he kissed up the line of her leg, her hip, her torso. He moved slowly, watching her with intent eyes the entire time. He came level with her, his body covering hers.  

It struck Rook that Emmrich was genuinely, without pretending, not in a hurry. Whatever patience he had, she felt none of it. She trembled under his attentions, burning with desire for him. Her hands stroked up and down his back, almost frantic. She was so empty that it ached. Blood pounded in her ears, drowning the world out. He was warm, and naked, and why wasn’t he already fucking her.

He kissed her on the mouth, slow and thorough, and Rook wrapped her legs around him. The feeling of his cock laid against her drove her wild. Rook bit her lip, rocking her hips against him, unable to stop. His cock bumped against her folds, and Rook made a quiet, desperate sound.

Emmrich pulled back from the kiss, as if to admire his work, watching her with ravenous eyes. But still, he didn’t claim her. Beyond words, Rook couldn’t help but whine. Begging him.

Emmrich lowered his head and let his tongue trace delicately down her neck. When he hit the junction between her neck and shoulder, Rook gasped and clutched him. He playfully let her feel the edge of his sharp canine. It wasn’t even a nip— despite its placement, right where a mating bite would go, it was barely more presumptuous than a wink and a blown kiss.

Intense heat surged through Rook. If he wasn’t fucking her in the next three seconds she was going to scream. She reached between them, lining them up.

Emmrich took her invitation at once, seating himself inside her in one deep thrust. She was so wet that there was no friction at all; one moment he was outside, and the next, buried to the hilt. Rook inhaled sharply. Even through the condom, she could feel a whisper of his warmth. The satisfaction of him filling her felt deeper than any hunger she’d ever sated. Emmrich paused, not moving, savoring the feel of her. He watched her face, eyes darting to capture every movement of her eyes, the twitches of her mouth.

And then he started fucking her in earnest.

Emmrich moved like a dancer, aware of every part of himself, with absolute, graceful control. Rook whimpered, her body locking, arching against him. She’d never been so sensitive before, not even close. The intensity of it made white stars burst in her vision.  Every smooth, deep stroke made Rook cry out. She wound her legs around his. She seized him by the hips, pulled. Deeper. More.

"If I'd met you in any other time, I'd go slow," Emmrich murmured, low and intimate. "I'd let you feel every inch of me. I'd linger. Let you have just enough of a taste to drive you insane. Slow, oh so slow, while you begged."

His mouth was not even an inch from Rook's ear. Goosebumps erupted on her skin.

"But I can't bear to tease you, not like this." Emmrich tenderly cupped her face with one large hand.

Rook took a shaky breath, turning her face toward his palm. His hips rolled, smooth and even. The feeling when he was pressed fully inside her made her want to cry.

"I'll give you what you need, darling."

It was hard to breathe. The pleasure was so complete that all she could do was whine and cling to him. Her skin lit up everywhere it touched his; being entwined with him felt like being at the heart of a bonfire.

"Is this what you need?" Emmrich purred.

"Yes," Rook said, voice strained. "Yes, yes, don't stop, please—"

Emmrich gave a low, approving growl.

The first swell of his knot pressed Rook open. The magical barrier didn’t cover it; the feeling of his skin made all of Rook’s thinking abruptly shut off. The feeling was so intense that for a moment, Rook forgot to breathe.

"You're—close?" Rook managed.

"Ah," Emmrich said, sounding a touch embarrassed. "Your scent is particularly intoxicating, my dear."

Oh—he had meant it when he said she smelled divine. The molten feeling in Rook's stomach got interrupted by another deep thrust that left her gasping at the stretch, clenching down. The feeling of being pressed open by his half-formed knot made everything feel sharper, rawer, brighter—too much, far too much. It was almost better than coming. It was worse than being ripped open. She gripped Emmrich so hard that her knuckles went white.

"I could pace myself. I could still last for some time," Emmrich murmured, grinding down.

Something deep inside Rook sparked, a sharp, bright pleasure. A moan tore out of her. Her legs locked around Emmrich. Having him pressed so deep inside her, with so much of his skin on hers, she felt delirious.

"Or I could fill you up right away. Your decision," he murmured directly into her ear.

The burst of desire from those words felt sharper than an arrow. Rook whined, rocking against him, frenzied. More, she wanted to tell him, but the word got lost on the way to her mouth, only incoherent sounds coming out. He thrust hard, and Rook keened. It felt like holding a spell that was far, far too strong when he bottomed out in her, a vibrating intensity that buzzed in every inch of her body at once. The terrifying ferocity of the feeling was matched by an equal desperation: the only thing worse than more would be less.

As good as it felt, it was so intense that each wave came with something that felt like panic. She clutched him like she was drowning.

“What would you like?” Emmrich said, his voice caressing the words.

“Emmrich,” Rook gasped, her voice strained with intensity.

Emmrich smirked. “Enjoying yourself, darling?”

The words caught in Rook’s throat again, a random jumble of consonants spilling out. She couldn’t take a full breath in, or out. Every inhale and exhale seemed a random length.  

Emmrich cocked his head, meeting her desperate, feverish gaze. A furrow appeared between his brows.

He pulled back abruptly, popping the growing swell of his knot out of her with difficulty—her muscles were tight around it, jealously keeping it in place. Once it was out, he kept his thrusts too short to let it enter her again. Rook’s body immediately and viciously protested the absence. She whined unhappily, hips jerking up, desperate for the stretching fullness. He stroked her cheek with his thumb.

“Easy, easy,” he said quietly. “That was too much, hm?”

Emmrich slowed his pace, and gentled the force he moved with. The terrifying intensity began to ease. Rook closed her eyes, trembling, and subsided. The feeling became softer, warmer. Her body loosened up.

“Is this better?” Emmrich asked.

Still too overwhelmed to speak, Rook nodded, her eyes still squeezed shut.   

The growing knot bumped up against her entrance, accidentally. Rook whined again, arching up hard, wanting.

“I have you,” Emmrich said, low and warm. He stroked her again. “That’s it. Gently, gently. Relax into it. It’ll feel better if you’re less tense.”

He bumped against her again, and Rook let out a strangled cry, trying to pull him in with all the strength in her legs. She was so tense she shook with it.

“C-can’t,” Rook managed. “Want—want—”

“Alright,” Emmrich soothed her. “Not this time. Shh. It’s alright. We’ll work up to it. There’s plenty to enjoy without it, darling.”

Emmrich stroked her flank, and Rook let out a shuddering gasp. She pulled him down, made him cover her entire body with his, until they were fully wrapped around each other. He shifted the motion of his hips, rolling strokes that didn’t pull them apart.

“Yes,” Rook moaned. “Good—please—yes—”

It felt incredible, her whole body lighting up with it. He was so warm, so solid, so strong.

Emmrich shivered. His warm breath puffed against the side of Rook’s face.

“You feel divine,” he murmured.

He sped up. Rook whined approval, burying her face against his shoulder.

“Good,” Rook gasped. “So—good—”

Pleasure built in her entire body, warm and loose.

The base of him slipped fully inside again, accidentally; she was so slick that it took no force. Rook’s breath caught. Emmrich stopped moving, panting, although he couldn’t prevent his hips from jerking minutely, his face twisted with pleasure.

“Too much?” Emmrich asked, breathless.

Rook’s whole body was singing with approval, tingles running from her head to her toes. She wanted his knot more than she wanted to breathe. She shook her head.

Emmrich rocked against her, tentatively. Rook gasped, clenching down on him. Emmrich hissed through his teeth, his grip on her tightening, and kept moving gently, slowly.

“Oh,” Rook said, almost tearfully. “Feels—so—"

The pleasure was deep, without her feeling close to the edge at all. She didn’t just feel good; she felt complete. The subtle shift of his entire body against hers was deeply erotic. Emmrich’s breath was shallow. He lifted his head, watching her with wild eyes.

“Too much?” he asked again, his voice so strained he could barely manage words.

“No. You feel—so—so—” Rook broke off with a sound which would have embarrassed her if she hadn’t been completely blissed out.

By the desperate sounds Emmrich was making, he felt the same. He was impossibly gorgeous in that moment, flushed, hair mussed by her hands, wide mouth slack with pleasure, eyes burning.

Emmrich looked at her like she was the loveliest thing he’d ever seen.

Rook clenched down, and he moaned, his eyes glazing over.

“Close,” Emmrich gasped. “In or out?”

“In me, please, in me,” Rook said immediately. “Please, I need, I need, please,”

Emmrich made a strangled sound, and thrust hard. His eyes clenched shut. His knot swelled sharply. The stretch was so intense that Rook cried out.

Emmrich cracked his eyes open with difficulty. Breathless, he said, “Relax, darling, your body can handle—oh.”

His voice broke, and his arms tightened around her.

“Rook,” he gasped.

He came so hard that Rook could feel his legs shaking. Her body locked down on his knot, squeezing. Emmrich moaned, loud and deep, burying his face against her neck.

The stretch of his knot paired with barest brush of his lips against her skin set off something wild in Rook. She let out a desperate sound, tightening her legs around him. She needed him to bite down, to claim her—

“Please, please,” Rook begged, voice breaking.

He didn’t bite. His lips skimmed the line of her neck, nuzzling. His cock pulsed, his body valiantly trying to pump her full.

The pleasure suddenly went electric. Rook’s eyes rolled back. Without warning, she came around him with an embarrassing whine.

Emmrich swore, low and heated, his fingers digging into her arse. His breathing was ragged.

The contractions subsided, slowly. After a moment Emmrich let out a long sigh. His body was loose, and still, his eyes soft as he opened them slowly.

“Spirits be good,” Emmrich said hoarsely. “Nobody's ever come on my knot while I was ejaculating.”

“Oh,” Rook said, embarrassed.

“I'm still seeing stars,” Emmrich added.

“Oh!” Rook said, relieved.

“Are you comfortable?” Emmrich asked, propping up onto his elbows. “I can take my weight off of—"

“No!” Rook blurted out with embarrassing quickness.

It was strangely comforting, having his body pinning her to the mattress. Given the strange things the heat was doing to her emotions, Rook might actually cry if he got up.

Well, that was humiliating.

Rook cleared her throat. “No, I'm fine.”

She was rather more preoccupied with the feeling of his knot inside her. The pleasure of being filled hadn’t gone away just because they’d stopped moving; actually, it seemed to be getting stronger. A fluttery feeling passed through her.

Emmrich stroked hair away from her face. “You're sure? I could—"

Rook fidgeted, wriggling.

Emmrich paused, sucking in a sharp breath, his hand gripping her hip.

“I'm sorry,” Rook said nervously. “I'm not trying to—to interrupt. I, I'll try harder—"

“It's fine, darling,” Emmrich said, with a crooked smile. It flashed a devastatingly attractive, sharp canine; Rook’s belly lurched. “Do what your body needs. I'm just a little sensitive.”

Rook bit her lip. Her legs were tense, her toes curling. The delicious feeling of him inside her was starting to radiate outward. Her cunt twitched, and Emmrich pulled in another sharp breath.

“Um, how sensitive? Is it unpleasant when I—” Rook faltered. She tried to hold back the gathering tension in her body. “When I tighten up?”

“It's exquisite,” Emmrich said, eyes crinkling. “Although rather intense. Rather akin to how taking my knot feels, hm?”

The filthy words in his mouth sent a surge through her. 

“Oh, good,” Rook said weakly, and then she was coming again.

Emmrich’s mouth fell open, body curling soundlessly over Rook, seeming unable to breathe. He gripped the bedspread white-knuckled.

“Oh,” Emmrich said, dazed. “You're—that’s rare.”

“What?” Rook said blankly.

“Knotting alone is typically not sufficient for an orgasm, despite what novels of a certain persuasion like to suggest.”

The words barely registered.

“Kiss me,” Rook begged.

Emmrich obliged with a deep kiss that made her moan into his mouth. Her hips started twitching, unable to stop. The minute shift of his knot inside her sent sharp sparks of pleasure up her spine, like a series of fireworks. Rook broke the kiss, gasping.

He kissed her neck softly, and suddenly Rook felt right on the edge of another orgasm. She ground down on him. So close. But it wasn’t enough. Rook shifted, restless, her hands wandering his body. She rocked harder, her breath coming short, but nothing was enough, not even close to enough. She arched off the bed, heels digging in, pressing up so hard that she actually lifted him. A frustrated noise burst out of her. Release was so close, so horribly close, taunting her.

“What do you need, darling?” Emmrich asked.

“You,” Rook said, her words almost a sob.

“You have me,” Emmrich murmured against her neck.

The tension snapped. Rook came, hard, shaking like her joints wanted to come apart. A deep shudder went through her when it was over, and she went limp. The satisfaction felt deeper than any orgasm; it felt like every problem she'd ever had fell away, and left her at peace.

“Oh,” Rook said, very quietly.

Emmrich kissed her forehead, his face tender.

“Hold me?” Rook asked.

His arms tightened around her, solid and warm.

Rook couldn’t hold herself back from stroking his face. His expression went soft, eyes closing. In the soft moments as they caught their breath, Rook felt… warm. As if a god had suddenly shifted the entire world on its axis and left an entirely new one it its place: somewhere much kinder. Much softer. Much safer.

Wow, bonding hormones were really no joke. Rook had always thought the stories were poetic license, or something.

“That felt nothing like—” Rook bit her tongue, eyes widening. She turned her face away abruptly and coughed. “I mean, that was really great.”

Emmrich stroked her cheek, quiet. After a long moment, he took her chin in his hand and gently guided her to look at him. His expression was quietly attentive. Not demanding that she speak: only saying I’m listening.

A shudder went through Rook, of a much less pleasant kind. Tears pricked her eyes. The words were heavy in her mouth, but she found that it was harder to hold them back then to let them out.

“He was a priest,” Rook said in a very small voice. “And it was my—my f-first—"

Emmrich stilled.

Rook couldn’t stop trembling. It radiated out from her chest, cold and sick, waves and waves of it. She felt nauseous.

After a long moment, Emmrich nodded acknowledgment. There was a quiet sadness on his face. He threaded his hand in hers and squeezed.

“Do you need space?” he asked, low and gentle.

Rook shook her head, too many times, too emphatically.

Emmrich wrapped her in his arms, tucking her head under his chin. Rook clung to him, trembling.

“This is so stupid,” Rook said, upset. “I don’t know why I’m—this never happens.”

“Breathe,” Emmrich said softly. “The hormonal cocktail in your body right now isn’t helping matters. Even normal emotions can feel far more intense, let alone something...of this nature.”

His scent, his voice, the soothing way he stroked her back, all did an embarrassingly good job of calming her. Rook buried her face against his neck and gave a shuddering sigh. Her breathing evened. The trembling eased. His presence felt like a cool compress against the aching, roiling pain of the emotions that had been dragged up.

Emmrich formed a physical barrier between her and the world, literally hiding her from sight, the strong solidity of his body acting as a protective wall. Despite how laughable flimsy that protection was in reality, there was something deep inside her that responded. An ancient part that worked on instinct didn’t care about little things like logic. Everything in Rook gradually calmed. The thoughts slowed. There was nothing but her body, safe and cared for, tucked cozily into her own bed, cradled by a stupidly attractive alpha.

Only then did Rook’s brain—most of the way offline since approximately, oh, yesterday—suddenly realize that being knotted meant having a smart, suave, stupidly attractive person be intimately close to her for—twenty minutes? Forty?

And he wasn’t completely souped up on heat hormones. He might have impaired judgement, as he’d said, but that wasn’t exactly the same thing as how Rook was pretty sure her brain had left the building. Unlike the mess of instinct Rook had become, Emmrich and that devastating intellect of his was still mostly functioning.

Academics liked talking, right?

“So, um, what are you a professor of?” Rook asked.

Maker, Rook did not have the brain power for this.

“Necromancy. I know, shocking for mage of the Necropolis,” Emmrich said, with a wry humor that seemed to be aimed at himself. “But I like to think that I’m uncommonly good when it comes to the greater mysteries of the Fade. Truly, there’s no more fascinating work.”

“What kind of mysteries?” Rook asked.

Emmrich brightened. “Of late I’ve been most interested in Talos’s conundrum, which has the most fascinating implications for conducting half-circle magic—”

Despite Rook’s rudimentary knowledge of magecraft, Emmrich immediately lost her. When she carefully asked a question, trying to hide just how badly she’d misunderstood everything, he practically vibrated.

“Yes, you raise an excellent point, one would think that there would be reverberations in the ether! And yet we can clearly demonstrate with simple quartz crystal that the direction of energy is far more complex—”

The longer he talked, the more Rook relaxed.

Oh good, he hasn’t realized how incredibly stupid I am right now…

She watched the animation of his face, the brightness of his eyes—he lit up as if from within. The genuine enthusiasm in his voice was very sweet. He gestured with his hands, expansive sweeps, flutters, emphatic underscorings of his points. Excited, he shifted in place.

Rook moaned, her body curling around his, forehead pressed to his chest. Her thighs squeezed together, a fine tremor running through them.

Emmrich laughed self-consciously. “Ah, I do so easily get carried away.”

The way that his hands lay on her body abruptly changed tone. The loose, satisfied way he held her became more purposeful, one hand trailing slowly down.

“But what about if—” Rook sucked in a breath as Emmrich’s hand slipped between them, pausing for a caress of her hipbone. Slowly, teasingly, it trailed toward where they were joined. His fingertips brushed her clit, and Rook nearly lost her question.

She continued in a much higher voice, “If—they use—silver—instead—”

Emmrich perked up. “Yes, that’s a classic vessel for a reason! We’ve now realized that the ceremonial vessels of antiquity—”

He paused, looking down at Rook’s flushed face.

“—but that’s a rather esoteric concern for the moment,” Emmrich said, and stroked her in a way that made Rook suddenly go blind.

Rook arched up, whimpering.

“Ceremonial—v-ves—those Elvhen teapots?” Rook gasped.

“The very same!” Emmrich said, beaming.

Rook’s first attempt at asking a question was swallowed by a guttural sound as Emmrich’s fingers worked something that felt extremely magical.

“What—do—how—teapots—” Rook tried.

“Now that is pure speculation, but I have a lovely correspondent among the Veil Jumpers who believes that the precise form of induction was conducive to—”

Rook squeezed her eyes shut, letting his pleasant voice wash over her. Her hips rocked up into the motion of his hand. His knot had gone down, partially, but he was still hard enough to bump against something inside Rook that made her breathless. Deep inside, pressure was building. Warm, so warm. She twitched around his cock, her hands falling to his hips, begging him to grind against her.  

Emmrich made a noise in the back of his throat, and abruptly pulled out.

Rook gasped, eyes flying open. She felt like she was going to cry. “No! Please—”

“We were heading directly for another lock, my dear,” Emmrich said apologetically. “We should get fluids into you first. Heats are extremely dehydrating, and you’ll only be more preoccupied later, not less. Would you like me to finish you off with my fingers now, or go get a drink?”

Rook blinked, disoriented, trying to understand what he’d said, and failing. The only thing she wanted was his cock back inside her, where it belonged.

That, Rook realized the instant before she said it aloud, would be an absolutely deranged thing to say. Ugh, heats.

“Hydration,” Emmrich said firmly, after the silence stretched.

He pulled a surprisingly luxurious dressing gown from his small suitcase. Spitefully, Rook instantly wanted to rip the purple fabric apart with her teeth—she very, very badly wanted to see that shockingly generous arse from every angle.

Emmrich then coaxed Rook into a loose shift, and solicitously ushered her into the kitchen.  

Chapter 4

The short pause to dress and troop to the kitchen left Rook’s brain just enough time to cool off. By the time that Emmrich was rummaging through the basket he’d brought, Rook was left feeling strangely shy.

“Could I tempt you with an elderflower cordial?” Emmrich asked. “Wonderfully sweet and refreshing.”

Rook would have absolutely accepted tepid pond water, if it was coming from him. That he was trying to give her a treat instead, like an omega to be courted and spoiled, rather than one who’d arrived desperate on his doorstep… Rook’s stomach squirmed with some pleased, sharp-edged emotion that she determinedly ignored.

“Sure, sounds good,” Rook said, trying to keep her voice casual.

He passed her a drink in a lovely cut glass bottle, smiling brightly. Rook took a sip; the sweet, floral taste was tempered by a surprising and delicious note of lemon. She made a pleased noise, and drank more, suddenly realizing she was thirsty.

Emmrich watched her with satisfied eyes. Only once she’d consumed half the bottle did he grab something for himself. He moved through her kitchen with the unselfconsciousness of a mature alpha, rummaging through her cabinets to locate a mug, and uncovering the pail of well water she’d drawn up herself the previous evening. Rook’s stomach flopped again as he leaned back casually against one of her counters, sipping her water from her mug, his silver hair gorgeously disheveled from her hands.

“Do you want any of the cordial?” Rook asked him suddenly. “It really is nice.”

Emmrich looked surprised. “That’s kind of you, my dear. I wouldn’t want to—”

Rook couldn’t keep the disappointment off her face.

Emmrich blinked, and backpedaled. “—very sweet of you to think of me. Yes, a taste does sound delightful.”

“You don’t have to give into my every whim just because I smell good this week,” Rook said.

That didn’t stop her from moving to stand between his slanted legs, passing him the bottle.

“That seems backwards,” Rook continued. “I mean, a heat is probably the worst decision-making I’ll do the whole year, right?”

She considered the debacle with the Mourn Watch some weeks before, and firmly decided that didn’t count. Mourn Watch’s failure of decision-making, really.

Emmrich gave a small, suppressed smile. “Somehow, Rook, I have a feeling that you’re good at getting your way regardless of pheromones.”

He took a sip, hummed with pleasure, and handed it back.

Rook absentmindedly set the bottle on the counter beside him. His lean legs, bracketing hers, were warm. The cut of his dressing gown showed a tantalizing strip of his chest.

Rook pressed up against him, nuzzling up to his neck. Emmrich’s breath hitched, a hand coming to rest, feather-light, against the back of her head. A contented noise slipped out of Rook, and she negotiated her hands inside his dressing gown, wrapping her arms around his bare skin.

Emmrich let out a strangled noise and buried his nose in her hair. Seemingly on reflex, his arms tightened around her, pressing her close. His obvious strength made Rook’s belly flutter.

The warm, safe feeling returned, seeping into her bones. Rook sighed, soft and satisfied. She relaxed into his touch.

Emmrich’s breath picked up. He stroked up and down her sides, over and over, moving slowly, but with great intensity. He seemed torn between the simple pleasure of touching her, and the overwhelming desire to devour her. His hands lingered on her hips with flattering, clear interest, before guiltily moving on.

Impulse had Rook tilting her head back suddenly, the curve of her neck laid out under him.

Emmrich made a low sound. Against her skin, his lips pulled back slightly, exposing his teeth. Rook’s heart started pounding, excited anticipation making her whole neck tingle. She’d never exposed her neck before, never wanted to. But the idea of his teeth scraping gently against her throat was so electric, so exciting—  

Emmrich abruptly pivoted, lifting her onto the counter. He pressed between her legs, and Rook’s body took sudden, intense interest in how close he was. The fabric of his dressing gown was warm with his body heat, more tempting, in a strange way, than just his skin would have been.

He shoved her shift up, greedily stroking the skin of her inner thighs. There was a gleam in his eyes as he uncovered her, voracious hunger mixed with a gratifying, obvious approval of what he saw. He fumbled at the closure of his dressing gown with one hand, the other stroking closer to Rook’s core in a way that was very, very promising.

But before Rook could open her legs, something in Emmrich’s eyes shifted.

“Oh,” he said in a small, embarrassed voice, and took a large step back.

Rook blinked, confused.

Emmrich ran a hand through his hair, trying to gather himself.

“I beg your pardon. You’re so wonderfully affectionate, I- I must admit to getting rather carried away. Please, tell me off when I go too far,” Emmrich begged. “I’ll stop whenever you ask, my word on it. I can’t believe I—I do apologize.”

“But I liked it,” Rook said, still confused. “I’ve liked everything you’ve done.”

She snaked her legs around him, pulling him back towards her. Emmrich’s balance wavered. He braced his hands to either side of her to stay upright. Deep inside, a part of Rook purred.

Emmrich looked poleaxed. “You l—”

The words seemed to hit him all at once, and he made an animal sound in his throat. He immediately flushed, self-conscious. It was so cute that Rook was tempted to kiss his cheek, right where the pink was deepest.

What he’d said abruptly made it through the heat haze.

“Wait. What do you mean, ‘affectionate’?” Rook asked.

Emmrich tried to suppress a smile, his gaze flicking briefly to where she’d snared him with her legs. “The cuddling drive usually only kicks in after being sated quite a few times. And some individuals have it in quite limited forms.”

Wanting to cuddle him as soon as he’d walked in the door wasn’t a normal part of a heat?

“How limited?” Rook asked with rising alarm.

“At the most extreme, perhaps only a bit of petting after being knotted, at which point they’re about ready to bite my hand off,” Emmrich reminisced fondly. “But even the more typical individuals are often—ah—very carnally focused to begin with, shall we say. Not much interested in slowing down.”

Oh, so it was weird weird. Rook went red.

“It often feels like a treat for a job well done,” Emmrich said offhandedly. “I've always been rather fond of it.”

“That’s good,” Rook said, mortified.

She tried to release her legs and let him move away, but found that her body just wasn’t having it.

Mine, an adamant part of her hissed. Warm. Nice.

Okay, but he’s not even a little bit mine though. C’mon. You’re being weird. Nobody tries to cuddle on a COUNTER.

MINE, it hissed back more insistently. IN MY HOME. HERE FOR ME. WARM. NICE. SMART. KIND. WARM.

The moment lasted a beat too long. His fingers were fanned to either side of her thighs, his gorgeous face not even a foot from Rook’s. There was a lingering, faint flush to his cheeks from bedding her, a vibrancy to his hazel eyes, a trace of color to his mouth from kissing her. The possessive part of her purred.

For a brief instant, his eyes flickered to Rook’s mouth.

There went her impulse control. Rook wound her hand around the open collar of Emmrich’s dressing gown and pulled him to steal a kiss.

Emmrich exhaled, relief softening the line of his shoulders. He didn’t pull back; he chased her mouth for more. Soft. Gentle.

Rook’s hands wandered his body. Idle at first, but the longer he kissed her, the more heated it became. She could feel anticipation gathering in him, muscles tensing, but he didn’t let the desire reach his mouth. He kissed her with careful restraint.

Rook was not a person who took pains to be careful. Emmrich’s control made the contrarian in her immediately want to see what happened when he broke.

Rook slid her hands into his hair, nails scraping against his skull. When his lips parted, she nipped him, gently pulling his lip until he could feel the stretch. Emmrich moaned, kissing her deeper, mouth moving with less patience.

Not enough. Not yet.

So she tightened her legs until his straining cock was pressed directly against her.

Emmrich made a soft sound, grabbing Rook’s thighs immediately. The muscles of his abdomen were tense as he once again held back from grinding on her.

Ever the gentleman…

Rook, however, definitely wasn’t. She rolled her hips in a way that made his fingers tighten on her.

“You are—quite strong,” Emmrich said. It was a compliment given with desperate intensity, as if he were barely holding himself back from something much more effusive, and much more vulgar.

Oh, he really did like how muscular she was. Rook tightened her hold on him, pinning him firmly against her grinding hips, and Emmrich’s breathing shifted to panting.

“And very—graceful—” Emmrich managed, which Rook took to mean that he very, very much liked the way she moved her hips. Tension coiled in his body. His hips jerked, tiny, involuntary motions, the edges of his control clearly fraying.

Rook kissed him even more aggressively, laying fierce claim to his mouth.

With a groan, Emmrich broke. He rutted against her forcefully, using her hips for leverage. It was shocking how good it felt. Rook moaned into his mouth, her hands dropping to squeeze his arse. Fuck, she’d never met a man so incredibly grabbable.

The thin fabric of her shift quickly rucked up, leaving only Emmrich’s dressing gown as a barrier between them. The teasing heat that passed through the cloth was quickly driving Rook insane. She pawed at the strip of fabric keeping it tied shut. It didn’t easily give, so she switched to pulling the sides apart, trying to part it enough to feel his bare skin.

Success. She shoved the fabric out of the way, luxuriating in the feeling of his muscular belly pressed against her, the wiry hair that trailed down from his navel, and most importantly: his bare, gorgeous cock. She moaned into his mouth, half desire, half relief. Rook gave a little shimmy of her hips, seating him properly against her.

Emmrich stopped moving suddenly. He pulled back from the kiss, opening glazed eyes, and looked down with frozen indecision. Rook stopped with him, uncertain what was wrong.

For a moment, there was only the sound of their heavy breathing. Emmrich stared at her, spread over his cock, as if transfixed.

He exhaled sharply through his nose, and let go of Rook to rummage through his pocket, pulling out the ring.

Oh.

“Already thinking of seconds?” Rook purred.

“We both know just how quickly things will escalate from here,” Emmrich said.

The words were practical, but his voice was deep and rough with an undercurrent of desire so strong that Rook twitched.

He slid the ring back on, not bothering to pull away from Rook. Rook shivered as the cool metal passed over her sensitive skin. Pressed between them, it quickly warmed.

Emmrich licked his lips, and hesitated, not activating the magic. He dragged his bare cock down her folds slowly. Paused, several long and deliberate seconds, as if debating the wisdom of what he was doing. Looking like a man knowing he was making a mistake, he did it again.

“I don’t know,” Rook said with false innocence. “How quickly will it escalate?”

She caught his eye, held it. Slowly, so slowly, she slid up his length. Emmrich’s nostrils flared. Just as slowly, she slid down. She couldn’t repress a shiver when the head of his cock rubbed over her clit, but she didn’t let her eyes close, didn’t look away.

Emmrich’s pupils were large and dark, his gaze intense, unblinking. His lips were parted. Another pass; Rook couldn’t hold back a moan. Emmrich exhaled, his gaze dropping. He grabbed her thighs and squeezed.

“You’re a patient man,” Rook teased him. “How quickly could it be?”

“Patience is relative,” Emmrich said, strained. “Pressed up against you, warm, dripping, your very scent a temptation…”

She slid down his length, squeezing her legs to keep him pressed firmly against her. She rolled her hips in a teasing circle.

“Very quickly,” Emmrich admitted, his voice rough.

Triumph flared in Rook’s chest.

“Oh, good,” she said with more false innocence. “Because I’m not patient at all.”

She reached between them and wrapped her hand around him, right where the ring lay, against the sensitive skin where his knot would form, and squeezed.

Emmrich moaned. His cock twitched, another drop of precum slipping out.

Rook laughed, breathless and pleased. She dragged herself over him again, savoring his obvious pleasure almost as much as her own.

Emmrich watched, jaw slack, eyes blank. All traces of intelligence left his eyes.

Seeing his fierce intellect reduced to raw desire might have been the most arousing thing Rook had seen in her life.

Emmrich began to rock against her, smooth rolls of his hips that made Rook instantly lose her composure. She sped up automatically, unable to stop herself. She pressed him more firmly against herself, legs trembling as he rubbed up against her clit.

Emmrich responded at once, grinding down on her clit so hard that she went blind. Rook lost her breath, her hand tightening on his cock. Emmrich groaned.

“I—sorry, I—” Rook said, breathless.

“Fine. That—good,” Emmrich said incoherently.

Oh—a knot took a lot of pressure, didn’t it? Rook, emboldened, squeezed hard.

Emmrich groaned, low and deep, and thrust up against her.

“Exactly—like that,” Emmrich said breathlessly.

Rook squeezed repeatedly, barely releasing the pressure each time. Emmrich moaned, cock twitching. His lips retracted slightly, showing a hint of his teeth, and he swayed forward before he caught himself. A thrill went through Rook. He wanted to bite down. To seize her shoulder in his jaws and not let go. To have her, to claim her—  

Emmrich shifted suddenly, grabbing her hips, taking control of how they slid against each other. He thrust against her, careful to hit her clit just so with every pass. Rook moaned, arms wrapping around his shoulders. His cock was feverishly hot, and every tantalizing thrust was the kind of good that made Rook ache for more. She needed him in her.  

Fuck. She’d taken on a challenge she couldn’t possibly win. Rook was already desperate for him, burning, and she wasn’t good at waiting at the best of times. To break Emmrich’s control first would be next to impossible. Only Rook’s stubborn competitiveness had her hanging on, while everything in her screamed to give in.

Rook fumbled between them. Emmrich paused, anticipation leaving his whole body tense. Rook dragged his cock down, letting his head catch and linger against her entrance with every pass. Each round was a little longer, as Rook fought for all she was worth not to sheath herself on him. Her hips jerked helplessly, desperate.

“Oh,” Emmrich said, wild, and with a sudden wave of his hand the magical barrier was up.

He plunged inside her before she’d even processed the magic. He thrust fast, and hard, nothing like the teasing pace that Rook had set. His arms wrapped around her, pulling her close to him. His head was on her shoulder, his torso crushed against hers, her legs wound tightly around his; the feeling of his body was almost as overwhelmingly good as the deep thrusts of his cock. Rook whimpered, clinging to him.

“As if I needed to be tempted,” Emmrich said unevenly against her shoulder.

He pulled her almost to the edge of the counter before she could figure out what he meant. The angle ground his pelvis directly into her clit with every stroke. It wouldn’t be enough to come, but it left her a mess anyway, trembling and begging. He pounded into her until she sobbed.

“Please, please—”

“Please what, darling?” Emmrich asked roughly.

“Good,” Rook managed.

Emmrich kissed her shoulder, and kept going. Behind his back, Rook curled her hands into fists. It was the only way to stop herself from sinking her nails into him. Humiliating whines spilled out of her. As the minutes stretched, perfect and glorious, Rook began to rethink whether he could get her over the edge with his cock alone. She twitched around him, panting.

“Emmrich,” Rook gasped.

And just like that, the base of his cock started to swell. Rook moaned, legs tightening around him so hard that they shook. Close, so close—

Emmrich abruptly slowed. He teased her with his growing knot, slipping it slowly in and out of her. Rook cried out, hips losing coordination as she chased the sensation of fullness.

“Please—need—please—” she said incoherently.

Emmrich only popped it out of her again, despite how tightly Rook’s body had locked down on it. Rook whined, pulling at his hips.

“No, please, I need—I need—stay—”

Emmrich didn’t listen, torturing her with slow strokes that hit a spot inside her that made her toes curl. Rook’s breath went uneven.

But he didn’t shove his knot back in her.

“Emmrich, please,” Rook begged.

Emmrich’s arms tightened around her. He came hard, his lower abdomen flexing.

Shocked disappointment flooded Rook. She twitched, helplessly trying to lock down on his knot—but it was too late. He’d kept it out of her.

And then his fingers were on her, sparking sharp and sweet. He’d barely touched her when Rook choked, her body locking up. She came soundlessly, unable to breathe.

Emmrich relaxed slowly, breathing hard, and pulled out immediately. Rook clung to him, still twitching with aftershocks, and felt strangely close to crying. Would he not want to hold her after, either? Should she let go?

Emmrich adjusted his head, settling his chin more comfortably over Rook’s shoulder. He stroked her back, light and slow, and leaned into her touch like an affectionate cat.

A bit of the terrible, painful tangle inside Rook’s chest eased.

“I wanted you to knot me,” Rook said. “Why didn’t you?”

It sounded a lot more plaintive, more raw and disappointed, than she’d meant it to.

“Oh,” Emmrich said, surprised. “I’m used to being begged in the heat of the moment, but most omegas I’ve known weren’t enthused by being tied down multiple times in succession, especially not in an awkward position. I didn’t mean to ignore you, darling, I was trying to be polite.”

“Oh,” Rook said.

She relaxed her grip on him a little, embarrassed.

“I’ll pay attention next time,” Emmrich assured her. “You’ll let me know after, once you’ve had enough. All right?”

“All right,” Rook said, and immediately wondered if he’d think she was weird if she asked for a lock every time.

Very reluctantly, she relinquished her hold on him. He probably didn’t want to cuddle on a counter.

Like any sane person.

Rook, by that definition, did not feel even a little sane.

Emmrich steadied her as she slipped down back onto her own two feet.

“Do you want anything more to drink? Food?” Emmrich asked her.

Rook shook her head. “Mostly I think I want to—”

An image flashed in her head of dragging her mattress into a corner of her bedroom and piling every cushion, pillow, and blanket she owned onto it, and then curling up around him right there.

She flushed, avoiding his eyes. “…go back to bed. I guess.”

“Do you want any time alone? Now is likely the part of the heat where solitary time would be easiest, if you wish it.”

Rook swallowed, not looking at him. “Um. I’d like you there with me. If you don’t mind.”

Emmrich’s face softened so much that Rook caught it even out of the corner of her eye. She looked up at him, feeling intensely vulnerable.

“Of course,” Emmrich said gently, and took her hand.

He let her lead him back to bed, submitting with a smile as she arranged him on it and then flitted back and forth, fluffing pillows, dragging the night table to his side and arranging it just so, making a dozen fretful adjustments for his comfort.

Only then did she crawl in beside him. She started two feet away from him, not wanting to crowd him.

Maker, he smelled so good.

Slowly, without meaning to, she wriggled closer. When she was only a few inches away, Emmrich watched her openly, amused.

“Would you like to be held?” Emmrich offered.

YES, Rook wanted to shout.

She hesitated.

“Only if you feel like it,” Rook said finally, her voice carefully neutral. “I’m fine either way.”

Emmrich’s mouth twitched. He opened his arms, a clear invitation.

Whatever dignity Rook had managed to preserve was lost in her ensuing mad scramble to IMMEDIATELY cuddle up to him. Rook pressed her face against his chest, cheeks burning. Okay, definitely not her finest work, he was absolutely going to crack a joke at her expense, and she completely deserved it—

Emmrich’s strong arms wound around her, giving her a gentle squeeze. He kissed the top of her head.

…Oh.

Rook snuggled in a bit more firmly, and completely let go.

Chapter 5

Notes:

Thank you everyone who comments! I've been thoroughly enjoying all of them 😊

Rook’s breathing slowed. A feeling of peace descended over her immediately. Her upper body rose and fell with the motion of Emmrich’s breath, with the same mesmerizing feeling as watching waves on a beach. Gradually, her thoughts trickled to a stop. There was only the pair of them, intertwined, content. Nothing she needed to do; nowhere else she needed to be; nothing else she wanted. She hummed, happy, and Emmrich stroked her hip, where his hand had come to rest, and fell back into stillness. His silence had an equally relaxed quality to it. By a sense that Rook couldn’t quantify, she knew that his mind had comfortably settled its attention here, on this bed, with her, just as hers had.

They lay quietly for a long time. Rook closed her eyes, content. After the intense agitation that had driven her for most of the day, the stillness felt like an even greater relief. Occasionally she’d press a kiss to the closest part of him she could reach, or he’d caress her side, but mostly, they simply laid together. A warm, affectionate feeling filled her chest.

Eventually, Emmrich shifted them slightly, rearranging Rook’s head and slotting their legs together again in a different way. Rook complied with a limpness almost as complete as if she were asleep. She turned her head toward him, breathing deep.

His delicious scent was now overlaid with a delicate hint of hers. After everything they’d done together, he smelled of her.

The mixture completely bypassed her brain. Smug, triumphant satisfaction bloomed in her chest. Just as immediately, she was wet again. One of Emmrich’s lean thighs was pressed between her legs; Rook tightened her grip on him, squeezing.

Emmrich immediately tugged Rook’s shift high enough to bare her arse, and the interest low in Rook’s belly abruptly went from vague to smoldering. She moaned, rocking against his thigh. The embarrassment of losing control tilted into sharp arousal as Emmrich grabbed her hips, encouraging her to move against him.

“I didn’t mean to…” Rook trailed off, not sure how to finish the sentence.

“That’s just the nature of a heat, my dear,” Emmrich said. “Do you want to go back to cuddling?”

“…feels too good,” Rook admitted, in a small, embarrassed voice.

She ground down on his leg, unable to stop.

“Good,” Emmrich said, voice dark and approving. “Take what you need, darling.”

He pressed his thigh more firmly against her, and Rook whimpered. A new wave of slick came out of her, coating his skin. Desire flared immediately in Emmrich’s eyes. He tightened his grip on her.

His erection bumped into Rook’s hip as she rocked. Rook swallowed a whine, feeling impatient and overheated. But the pleasure was so sharp, so white-hot, that she wasn’t willing to let go long enough to seat herself on him.

His dressing gown, though, had to go.

“Take it off,” Rook ordered, tugging the hem.

Emmrich complied at once, fumbling at the ties. Unlike the care he’d used when he first got undressed, he threw the dressing gown to the side as soon as it was off him. Rook’s eyes raked over him eagerly. Everything about him excited her—the thickness of his body hair, the faint outlines of his muscles, his sharp, lean hips, his tempting little nipples, peaked with interest—

Impulsively, Rook leaned down and took one into her mouth. Emmrich inhaled sharply as she played with it with her tongue. His cock twitched against her, a drop of precum smearing on her hip. Rook sucked, and was rewarded with a groan. Emmrich pressed her harder against his leg, and Rook abruptly lost control of her body. She sat back again, moaning, and sped up.

Emmrich’s gaze dropped, watching her grind down with lips parted. He looked away almost immediately.

“I do apologize,” Emmrich said. “The way you move is rather… eye catching. I’ll—I’ll try to do better.”

Oh, when she’d told him how much she hated having “breeding hips” he thought that he shouldn’t—

“You can look,” Rook said. “I want you to.”

Emmrich glanced at her face, hesitant, and oh, that was already so different from the alpha stares that she hated so much. She jerked her chin: go on, then.

Because when his excited gaze settled on her, shyly taking in her hips, her thighs, her cunt, it wasn’t like the strangers she’d known, thinking only of what they wanted and how they’d turn her into a hole to fuck. Emmrich’s hands were impatient on her, urging her on, but Rook knew that what he wanted was to see her fall apart. If she came a dozen times and didn’t once touch that stupidly pretty cock of his, he’d say nothing, waiting patiently until she wanted him—and if that never happened, then he’d walk away, aching and wanting, perhaps, but without a twinge of regret.

His soft patience, his unwavering consideration for her, turned her usual hatred of being stared at into an impish, perverse desire for him to look his fill. Let him want her. Let him want her so much that he could think of nothing else. Let him watch her, aching and leaking, until it consumed him, until he needed her more than he needed food. And then him to have her, lose his mind fucking her, spill deep inside—

Rook’s body tightened, her breathing going short.

Emmrich shot upright and pressed Rook back against the mattress, almost clumsy in his eagerness. His cock rubbed against her thigh, and Rook tilted her hips, hungry. Emmrich backed up, pressing her legs open. There was a greedy look on his face as he looked at her spread cunt.

It was only as he started to lean in that Rook realized what he was doing.

“Wait!” Rook yelped, trying to close her legs.

Emmrich paused, a furrow between his brows, and reluctantly tore his eyes away.

“Is this one of the things you’d prefer not to do?” Emmrich asked, sounding strangely disappointed.

Rook’s cheeks burned. “You don’t have to do that. I’m too wet.”

Emmrich looked at her blankly. “Pardon?”

She was so, so red; she could feel it. “It’d get all over your face.”

Emmrich blinked a few times.

“Darling, you being wet is rather the point,” Emmrich said, and caressed her thighs.

Rook whimpered, pressing up against the touch automatically.

“If you don’t want to, then by all means, we won’t. But you have no idea just how much I’ve wanted to bury my face between your legs. To smell just how delicious you’ll be, and then have to wait...”

The words were a growl by the end.

Rook’s eyes widened. She tried to say something, but only managed a squeak.

Emmrich made eye contact. He lowered his head slowly, as Rook watched him, transfixed. When she didn’t stop him, he gave her a long, filthy lick, his tongue sliding over every inch of her.

Rook made a strangled sound and buried her hands in his hair.

Emmrich didn’t look away, watching her with a heated gaze as his tongue explored her, doubling back to lovingly repeat anything that made her twitch or moan. Rook’s eyes squeezed shut. Emmrich’s mouth was fiercely hot, the play of his tongue and lips and breath over her making her jerk and cry out. He didn’t once touch her clit; as he kept going, and going, it became clear that it was because he didn’t want for her to come and for him to have to stop. He was tireless, jaw working, tongue lathing, flicking, swirling, sucking, until Rook was breathing raggedly, moaning with everything he did. The bed was soaked under her all the way to her knees.  

Somehow, without having been directly touched once, Rook started to get close. She had no idea what he was doing, except that it felt so amazing that she might die, right here and now. Her cunt tightened, the pleasure going deeper, and deeper.

When he fastened onto her clit, tip of his tongue flicking in ways that had Rook seeing stars, Rook had time to hysterically think how did anybody give him up—

And then she came, hard. Emmrich didn’t stop, only gentled his mouth, teasing the underside of her clit as she shook. He wandered away from her clit as soon as she’d stopped twitching, sucking her folds into his mouth, teasing her entrance with the tip of his tongue. He kept going, patient and implacable, until she was rocking against his mouth, clenching down, wanting.

Abruptly, he raised his head. He slid two fingers inside her. It wasn’t enough, but Rook would bite anyone who tried to take it away, and she’d make it count.

“Mm,” he hummed. “Just as I thought.”

Rook struggled to form words. “Just as—what—”

“Your pleasure is impossibly lovely,” Emmrich said, his voice rough and low.

Rook’s belly lurched. A third finger slid inside her, wiping out Rook’s half-formed thoughts. She groaned, shutting her eyes. Three of his blunt, thick fingers was good, but still not enough.

“More,” Rook said immediately, desperation in her voice.

“It feels insatiable, doesn’t it?” Emmrich said roughly. “It’s not, darling. I have you. Put one hand on my shoulder—that’s it. Squeeze twice if it ever gets too much.”

He pressed all five of his fingers together and slid them into her.

Rook’s back arched off the bed. She immediately lost her mind, bucking wildly. His fingers couldn’t go as deep as before, but the stretch of it was so good that every word she had ever known fled her. Rook writhed and sobbed as he fucked her.

His fingers slowly got deeper inside her, a little bit at a time. The stretch was intense; Rook’s legs shook. She clenched down on his shoulder, hard. Breathing unevenly, she rocked against his hand. Her mind was empty. There was nothing but the raw feeling.

His fingers disappeared inside her, almost to the knuckle, and Rook wailed.

“Too much?” Emmrich asked.

Rook shook her head hard, half a dozen times in succession. She couldn’t speak.

He didn’t move his hand, letting her body adjust to the intense stretch. Rook panted and twitched around him, flooded with the feeling.

“That’s it, darling,” Emmrich murmured. “You’re doing so well.”

Emmrich replaced the thrusting motion of his hand with a slight twist at the base, back and forth, a tiny motion. Rook whimpered, clenching down on him. Her chest heaved for breath.

Emmrich pressed a kiss against her hip. Rook exhaled shakily. He kissed her again, slow, unhurried. The lack of urgency hit somewhere deep inside Rook’s brain; her body relaxed. Waves of pleasure began to run through her, loose and diffuse. It felt like standing on the edge of something big. Something all encompassing. Something she’d never felt before.

And then Emmrich shoved his hand just so, and his knuckles disappeared inside her.

The pleasure spiked, sudden and sharp, and Rook came screaming. Her body locked down on his hand like a knot. Her shaking thighs clenched around his shoulders in a crushing grip.

When the waves subsided, Rook found that her body hadn’t come all the way down. The feeling of Emmrich’s hand inside her, stretching her so far, felt a kind of good that she could feel in her bones. Her cunt felt…satisfied. Having his hand there was intensely intimate, in a completely different way than his cock had felt.

Rook trembled uncontrollably, squeezing down on his hand unpredictably. It felt too chaotic and patternless to be another orgasm, but too intense to be just aftershocks.

His eyes were on her, watching her with obvious satisfaction. He took in every shaky breath, every squeeze of her thighs, every shivering twitch of her body.

She desperately wanted to kiss him.

Emmrich shifted, just barely, and the tiny movement felt incredibly intense. Rook whimpered again, and started rocking into his hand. The feeling of satisfaction rose, and rose. Her cunt locked down on his knuckles again, and Rook lost her breath.

Emmrich dropped his head and began to toy with her clit, teasing with the barest tip of his tongue. Rook’s breath restarted with a shuddering gasp. Her thighs locked around him, and both hands found their way to his hair again, pulling him against her with all her might. He licked her, soft and slow.

It was almost unbearably sweet. The pleasure ratcheted up impossibly high. Rook whined, writhing.

Her desire crystalized, urgent and focused. She didn’t need release, she needed him. Rook pulled at Emmrich’s wrist, frantic.

Emmrich complied immediately, popping his knuckles out of her. The delicious stretch eased.

Rook was moving immediately, yanking his hand fully out of her. When Emmrich sat up, alarmed, Rook pounced. She shoved him back onto the bed, clawed her shift above her hips again, and sheathed herself on him with a growl. Rook’s eyes closed, immediate relief flooding her body. He filled her in all the ways she wanted, warm and solid, pleasurable and comforting and safe. She gave a guttural groan and started riding him, hard and fast.

“Darling, wait, wait,” Emmrich said, panic in his voice.

Rook’s body didn’t want to stop, not for anything, not when Emmrich was right where she wanted, right where she needed him. It took an extreme force of will to pause, opening unfocused eyes to look at him.

Emmrich roughly lifted her, pulling her off his cock. Rook snarled at him, fighting him to put her back, but he was too strong. He rolled to the edge of the bed, holding her off with one arm, and frantically went through the pocket of his dressing gown, pulling something out of it. He turned onto his back and Rook immediately threw her leg over his hips and mounted him again. She went even faster, even harder, feral with want after the interruption. She kissed him hard, growling low in her throat.

When she pulled back, impatient and wanting a better angle to slam her hips into his, Emmrich’s back arched. His tendons stood out in sharp relief.

“Darling, I’m going to lock you if you don’t slow down,” he gasped.

Rook growled. She lunged, moving to bite his throat. Halfway through the motion, something deep inside her remembered: not allowed…

Rook shuddered. She turned her head sharply, biting down on her own arm.

She didn’t slow down. Emmrich’s desperate cries and the sharp sound of flesh slapping together only made the fire in her belly burn hotter.

Emmrich’s knot swelled, stretching her so quickly that it hurt. He came barely a second later, his fingers digging into her hips. Rook bit down harder, jaw flexing, until her arm screamed with pain. The firm stretch of his knot immediately toppled her over the edge, and she came, hissing.

The feeling of him securely inside her soothed the frantic energy of her body immediately. She relaxed a little, letting go of her bite. Her hands smoothed up and down Emmrich’s torso, a touch that felt more like a giddy acknowledgement of you’re here, you’re here, you’re here! than any real hunger.

Emmrich’s breath heaved. He didn’t release her hips, looking shellshocked.

Rook’s thinking abruptly switched back on, and she realized what she’d done. She froze.

“Oh. Fuck,” Rook said, the beginnings of panic stirring in her stomach. “Oh fuck. Are you okay? Did I—shit. Do you want to leave? We can—witch hazel makes a knot go down sooner, right? I have some. I’m sorry. I didn’t—I didn’t mean to—”

She couldn’t stop herself from brushing hair away from his face, touching his cheek, distraught for having mistreated him, desperate to make it better. The thought of him leaving twisted her guts into hard knots.

“I’m perfectly fine,” Emmrich assured her, his voice gentle.

Emmrich laid a hand over hers, the one on his cheek. Relief replaced Rook’s panic immediately, and she sagged.

Emmrich shifted to sit up, and Rook stifled a moan as his cock shifted angles inside her.

“You did very well given the fever, darling. I was just concerned about an unwanted pregnancy—or an unwanted lock,” Emmrich said.

Rook suddenly felt the faint sensation of his ring buried inside her. Oh, so that was why he had rolled away. In her frenzy, she hadn’t even noticed him pick it up or put it on.

“Oh, no, I'm very—" Rook blushed. “Well, I'm, um, very happy where I am.”

With her alarm receding, it was very hard to ignore just how much her body liked it, in fact. She prevented herself from grinding down with a heroic effort.

“Do you need to stop?” Emmrich asked with concern.

“Huh?”

He stroked her arm gently, near where she bit herself. The marks were already darkening; it’d be an impressive bruise in a few hours. Rook’s blush got worse.

“Um, do you have a muzzle in that basket you brought?”

Emmrich blinked. It was clear the answer was no.

“I'll just shove a stick in my mouth before next time, it's fine,” Rook said. Her face burned so badly she could feel it in her ears.

She couldn’t hold back the rocking anymore. Moaning, she dropped her head onto Emmrich’s shoulder.

“Why on earth would you need—”

Emmrich’s question ended in a sharp exhale. His abdomen tensed, and his cock twitched repeatedly.

“Did you just—?” Rook asked breathlessly.

“Beg your pardon,” Emmrich gasped. “I'm afraid that the way that you clench down—”

He gave a breathless, self-conscious laugh.

“Rather, that is to say, while my personality is well suited to assisting with heats, my body is, erm, overly enthusiastic in pursuit of conception.”

The words went directly past Rook’s brain. Her body reacted to the idea of his child in her belly instantly, getting even wetter, as if she weren’t already wet enough for an apocalyptic flood.

“Well, helping should have some perks,” Rook said, trying to keep the heat she felt out of her voice. She was pretty sure she failed. “How many times in a row can it happen?”

“The most I've ever experienced is four,” Emmrich said. “Only during a heat, naturally, the physiology is different such that—"

Rook, lips parted, didn't stop rocking, pairing swivels of her hips with clenching down on him rhythmically.

Emmrich made an animal noise. He promptly blushed.

“Pardon me,” he said.

Rook wanted to hear it again. She didn’t let up.

“I promise I’m perfectly content without any—” Emmrich’s jaw went slack as Rook changed the angle of her rocking, and he clearly lost his train of thought. Rook repeated it immediately.

“—perfectly happy—just to help—” Emmrich said breathlessly.  

“It’s only fair,” Rook insisted.

Emmrich bowed his head, a desperate ah! escaping him, and came again. The intelligence fled from his eyes.

Rook watched him, unblinking, as he fell apart again and again.

“Wait, wait,” Emmrich begged after the fifth.

Rook stilled, breathing heavily, and stroked his skin. Emmrich’s eyes were tightly closed, his breathing ragged. His normally cool skin tone had been taken over by a deep flush, pink everywhere—his forehead, his throat, his chest, even his shoulders. He clung to her like to a lifeline, letting out a low moan as she clenched around his knot again.

“I'm sorry,” Rook said helplessly. “I'm not doing that on purpose, it just feels so good to have your cock in me—"

Emmrich moaned again, curling around her. He pressed his sweaty forehead to the bony center of Rook’s chest.

“Don’t—apologize. Feels—"

His muscles were tensing, iron hard, and his locked arms plastered Rook to his body. His breath evened out, deepening. Seemingly beyond his control, his hips jerked convulsively.

“Rook,” Emmrich said, with breathtaking intensity. His voice broke. “Oh fuck, Rook...”

His eyes rolled back, and his cock jerked so hard that Rook could feel every pulse. When the shivers stopped wracking his body, he flopped back, boneless. Rook went with him, lying limply on his chest. They breathed in tandem. Emmrich had one arm flung over his face.

“...that was new,” Emmrich said into the crook of his elbow.

“Good new?” Rook asked nervously.

Emmrich removed his arm to look at her incredulously. “Darling. A choir of angels descended. I'm not even Andrastian.”

“Oh,” Rook said, pleased.

She stripped her shift and settled more comfortably on him, laying her head so that she could hear his heartbeat.

After a few minutes, Emmrich asked sleepily, “Would it put you out terribly if I slept in your bed? It’s only... I’m not sure I can stay awake long enough to make it to the couch.”

He blinked down at her, slowly, his hazel eyes half-lidded.

Rook pulled him a little tighter against her, snuggling in.

Emmrich let out a sigh that seemed to come from deep inside and closed his eyes.

“You really are quite soothing to hold,” Emmrich mumbled indistinctly. “Such a… holdable shape… very warm, very peaceful…”

Rook curled around him, feeling sleepy and safe. She drifted in and out of blissful sleep. Every time she woke, wrapped in his arms, warm and content, her stomach gave a happy wiggle, and she immediately slipped off again.

Chapter 6

Rook woke to the golden sunlight of early evening pouring into her bedroom window. The light fell across Emmrich’s face and a sliver of his collarbone, so lovely that Rook ached. He was on his side, eyes half open, relaxed, watching her with soft attention. In the full light his irises looked like the gold and green of a sunlit pond in midsummer, warm and inviting.

Rook shifted closer, and kissed him softly.

Emmrich slid a hand into her hair immediately, eyes fluttering shut. He kissed her repeatedly, sweet kisses with lingering pauses between them, gentle and slow. Rook’s belly warmed. She watched his face as they traded kisses, unable to look away from his handsome features, his soft expression.

Rook reached past him to the night table, finding where he’d left the ring. She settled back down, sliding the ring down his length, and flicked her hand, calling up the artifact’s magic herself. Emmrich shivered, and kissed her again, just as softly as before.

Rook slipped him inside, wiggling her hips closer to get his full length buried deep, and then fell still. Emmrich’s long eyelashes fluttered. He sighed, light and content, and bumped his nose affectionately against hers.

Rook savored the stretch of his cock in her, the light pleasure of it. The sweet temptation to move would overcome her soon, but for now… her eyes traced Emmrich’s skin, picking out every faint freckle, every sunspot. All the while, the need to move built in her, a low ache, sharpening every time his cock gave an excited twitch, every time the squeeze of her cunt stopped his breath. Emmrich’s eyes opened, watching her in turn. He stroked her hair, a little smile on his face.

Only when Rook was sure she had seen every adorable freckle did she lean in again, kissing him. She rocked against him, a slow, tiny movement. Emmrich responded in kind, tenderly. They moved gently, two people in agreement that there was no finish line to rush to. Lingering here, wrapped around each other, exchanging soft kisses, the pleasure building slowly, sweetly, because they didn’t want it to end. By the time the light had passed all the way across Rook’s bed, Rook was gasping, her hips motionless for several long seconds between each stroke, desperately trying to hold on just a little longer. His knot was almost full inside her, so intensely sweet, so perfect. The quiet, desperate sounds Emmrich was making pushed her closer to the edge, closer, closer, while she hung on with whitened fingertips—

Rook’s brain, already hazy, quietly turned off. Her internal narrative lost coherence, mind flashing between images, with no memories of what came before, no thought of what came after. Emmrich staring at his cock pumping in and out of her, his mouth slack… waking in the middle of the night and riding him, watching the pleasure on his face under a thin sliver of moonlight... Emmrich’s beard rasping as he eats her out again as if ravenous, Rook sobbing, hips rocking to meet him... Emmrich coaxing water and food into her as Rook begs him to fuck her… Emmrich plowing into her with the desperation of a man on the edge, groaning, while Rook locks her legs, forcing him deep... the warmth of Emmrich at her back, a feeling of complete safety... shuddering around his knot, unable to stop coming, one after another, as he maps every bit of her neck with his mouth and tongue… attempts to get clean interrupted by her wandering hands… wrapped around each other, cuddling, lazily rocking, his thumb on her clit... her eyes half lidded, breathing the same air as him, his head on her hand, stroking his cheek… shoving Emmrich back onto the bed, taking his cock down her throat, his sweet little protests that he doesn’t need anything falling away into delicious groans and pleading… a breathless recitation of poetry as she rocks in his lap, the words lost to her but his voice so beautiful… the motion of his hips slowing almost to nothing as he kisses her deeply... watching his mouth with a predatory air as he eats… his cock twitching against her belly as they exchange open mouthed kisses, twining around each other, his heated moan as Rook shifts and begins to rub against him… leaning hard against the counter as he thrusts into her, kissing the back of her neck, Rook begging him incoherently to bite her… nuzzling him, locked down on his knot…kissing his back, exploring every sensitive inch, as he moans and shivers… his arm wrapped around her, his fingers inside her, moving so slowly, so deliberately, that for the first time she understands the words making love... stroking every inch of him, unable to look away… his mouth on her breasts as she begs and begs for him to fill her, until he shoves three fingers inside and she arches and gasps... waking only long enough to move closer to him, his arm wrapping around her more firmly even in his sleep…

Rook awoke, disoriented, sorer than she’d been in her entire life, as Emmrich stepped inside the doorway of her bedroom with a tray of food.

“Ah, there you are,” Emmrich said cheerfully. “I thought it might break soon.”

He set down the tray on the night table, handing her the glass of water first.

“It’s the…” Rook thought about it, her brain moving slowly. “Nineteenth? Twentieth?”

Her throat was scratchy, her voice hoarse. She took a long drink.

“Ah—afternoon of the twenty-fourth, actually.”

Rook nearly spat out her water.

“Eleven days? You shouldn’t have—I never meant to keep you that long! You should’ve just left on the twentieth.”

“It’s summer vacation at the moment, I didn’t have any pressing responsibilities,” Emmrich said dismissively. He paused. “And I will admit, I rather lost track of things myself.”

Rook drank more, struggling to process that she’d accidentally kept him a full week and a half. Emmrich had pulled on some loose trousers, but for the moment, hadn’t bothered with a shirt. There were an embarrassing number of bite marks and sucked bruises on his collarbone, his chest, and his hips, in a variety of colors—she’d clearly marked him many times a day for the duration. It was a relief to see that, at the very least, she hadn’t touched his neck or shoulders at all.

…Okay, no, still not that much better, even a third as many marks would be embarrassing to put on any alpha. Hold on, was that an edge of a bite mark on his arse showing just above his waistband…?

Rook’s arms were no better off, bruised from shoulder to wrist, save for the bit just above and below her elbow. There were a lot more older ones than fresh, but the sheer number of her own teeth marks visible—oof, she’d be wearing long sleeves for a fortnight, and Haelwic would absolutely heckle her about it.

“I tried to redirect you from biting yourself when I could,” Emmrich said guiltily. “Two of your pillows were a casualty, although a few stitches should put them to rights. But I’m afraid that when you were most enjoying yourself you were rather, er, persistent.”

“Yeah, sounds about right,” Rook mumbled into her water glass. “Sorry I bit you so much.”

“Oh, don’t think twice about it,” Emmrich said lightly, waving a dismissive hand.

It struck Rook suddenly that Emmrich carefully hadn’t looked below Rook’s neckline, not once. A strange feeling curled in her empty stomach.

“I laid out some clothes for you to change into,” Emmrich said, gesturing to the foot of the bed, and then left the room to give her privacy.

Rook’s heart absolutely plummeted. Her shoulders slumped as she pulled on what he’d laid out—full clothes, too, not just the simple shift he’d had her wear the first day. The practical side of her knew there was no use arguing with it; she put them on quickly, not looking at anything in particular, and then nibbled at the food he’d brought her, feeling closer than she wanted to admit to crying. The heat had been… intense. All encompassing. Emerging on the other side like this, quietly, as if it had been nothing more than a single rowdy night of drinking, felt… unsettling. Wrong.

Her nibbling quickly morphed into a much more rapid shoveling as her hunger hit her properly. Emmrich had prepared a generous tray, half again as much as Rook would eat in a whole day—an unusual departure from most alphas, who seemed to think that omegas ate as much as a rabbit. He’d been right about how much to make, Rook quickly realized, after she’d inhaled more than half of it without pause.

Emmrich knocked on the door before he came in. He’d dressed fully, his tailored clothing impeccable again, hair neatly slicked back and moustache perfect, although admittedly his shirt was a bit crumpled.

“Is there anything else you need, my dear?” Emmrich asked.

He asked the question with the same warmth and attentiveness as anything he’d said to her during her heat.

Desperately, Rook wanted to hold him one more time. To lay down together on her sofa, his warm chest under her cheek, his lovely scent in her nose, his arms around her, safe and content.

After so many days of touching him casually, repeatedly, more often than she had slept or eaten or drank combined, the feeling of distance was alien. To be alone in her own body was jarring. Disorientating. Discomfiting.

Other omegas never asked him to cuddle so much.

“Nothing I can’t handle,” Rook forced herself to say.

“Very good,” Emmrich said. “I’ll let you rest, then. I hope you have a lovely rest of your week.”

And then he gracefully disengaged, and left. The quiet sound of Rook’s front door shutting was the loudest thing she’d ever heard.

Rook was the most boisterous person she knew. Always on the move, always laughing, yelling, joking, living.

For the rest of the afternoon she stayed frozen on her bed, staring at the tray of food Emmrich had left, surrounded by the smell of him, her chest so hollow it ached.

Notes:

Happy ending coming, everyone. But first...

Every romance I ever write is, at some point, a tragedy. It's time.