Chapter Text
…
It’s been a long time since ITrapped got those two idiots out. He felt relieved that they won’t complain how fucking terrible the weather it is in there.
He has heard about their complaints. He didn’t really care since at least he got his friends back.
Or…
Or so he thought he did.
It was odd. They weren’t the same.
Maybe it's because ITrapped changed and they haven’t changed.
…
(LATER THIS DAY)
“God! Why can’t you just understand that I don’t want to deal with your teasing bullshit!”
“Oh come on, Isaac! You gotta be kidding me?”
“Am I? Does it look like I’m joking around?”
“What has gotten into you? Geez. You used to be sooooooooooo different.”
“And you are still the same shitty Ellernate who confessed to me like they were telling me genuine feelings!”
“You're still upset over that? Pffft! You’re truly pathetic, Isaac!!!”
“…ugh.”
Ellernate walked to ITrapped. Making ITrapped feel uncomfortable and breaking his boundaries.
“You know. Maybe I see why Caleb sometimes calls you a cold-hearted bitch...”
“Oh sure I am, smartass. Like you didn’t get banned-“
“Oh now you are using that against me? That’s fucking bullshit-“
“You’re the biggest piece of shit I have dealt with. Oh I wish I was friends with someone else!-“
“Wow!? Now you tell me that you don’t want to be my friend-“
“Oh please, I never asked to be-
“Oh sure you did NOT ask to be YOUR friend-“
“Does it look like I-“
“Can both of you shut up? Geez.”
Caleb sighed as he lowered his hoodie. He then closed the door while holding some groceries.
“I just came back and of course you two are arguing.”
“Blame Isaac! He started it first because all I did was tease him!-“
“Well all I wanted was for you to fucking accept the new-“
“Just shut up honestly. The more you two talk, the more the argument continues. Jesus… you guys act like kids…”
Caleb then placed the groceries onto the counter. Ellernate and ITrapped then stopped talking and avoided each other’s gaze.
“…”
“I’ll help you out, Cal.”
“Thanks.”
“…Let Isaac be. I’m sure he’s gonna need a breather.”
“…Fine.”
ITrapped sighed then opened the door and went outside.
Ever since Chance’s death. The death he caused. Their parents were unaware that he caused his death and pretended that he was too late to save Chance.
Because of that… He currently lives in Chance’s supposedly penthouse. It was those fancy penthouses. The two was shocked that ITrapped managed to find a rich guy to let him have an apartment like that.
“…”
“…Fucking hell, Nate…”
He remembered the day Ellernate confessed to him. He felt awful for actually falling for the bait. If he knew he was joking around maybe he wouldn’t be this upset with his teasing…
…
He still wished those were real.
But would someone like him actually reciprocate his feelings?
His yearning for someone to hold him?
To care for him?
To tell him sweet words?
To comfort him in his worst?
To kiss his wounds?
To admire him?
Yet all he can do is wait.
…just wait.
“…I hate you… so much…”
Yet he couldn’t. He still loved him. And yet all he can do is watch and wait.
Ellernate is too blind to see the signs for his yearning for his love.
He wanted Ellernate to stop his one-sided love situation. And yet nothing is changing.
He wanted to hold his hand again but he thinks his own hand is too cold for him. Even Ellernate pointed it out himself.
He hated how he made everything the opposite of the situation he is in.
Chance made him feel loved. Loved to the point ITrapped didn’t believe it. Until he stabbed him. His last word… it was stuck in his heart instead of his mind.
…
(FLASHBACK)
ITrapped was planning to hang out with the two today. Though… Ellernate wanted them to meet up first.
He didn’t know why but he didn’t really care. Then he heard Ellernate’s voice from the distance.
“Isaac!”
“?”
“Ah! Nate.”
ITrapped gave him a warm and welcoming smile. And of course, Ellernate smiles back.
That stupid smile. ITrapped loved the way it fit him. He wished he could smile more often-
“Is something that attracts your attention beautiful?”
“Wha-“
ITrapped was shocked. It was unexpected and he felt his face burning that his head wing reacted and blocked his face
“H-Hold up there!”
“What? Is there something wrong?”
“I just wanted to tell you how much you truly mean to me, Isaac…”
“…”
“W-What do you mean by that, Nate…?”
“We have been friends for a while… And… I wanted to tell you…”
Suddenly he pulled out a bouquet of roses… his favorite color too which is white…
“…those are my favorites…”
Ellernate smiled. He then spoke,
“Because I see you more than a friend…”
“…Wh-“
“…”
“Oh shit. No wait. I-I…”
“I mixed up my words there.”
“Eh?”
ITrapped felt confused… Was he confessing to him or…
“I-It’s our anniversary for our friendship… since you really like greeting me and Caleb in a formal way… I-I thought I should try it too!!! Well. Attempt too. Caleb should be laughing his ass off, right now…”
“…”
“Ah… I see…”
…
He thought it was real for a moment. But he let his hopes down… But isn’t this progress?
Right…?
All he has to do is wait. Wait until Ellernate confesses. Or wait until he confess to Ellernae
“Either way… Thank you, Ellernate.”
“Ah-… Y-You’re welcome! Sorry for the… confusing way of greeting it…?”
“I’m fine. But at least I know you would be horrible at confessing to your crush…”
“Oh shut up, Isaac!”
The two laughed it off… While ITrapped still yearned for the day Ellernate confessed to him.
…
(END OF FLASHBACK)
…
ITrapped was exploring around town until Chance’s mother suddenly spotted him and invited him over to their house.
He wished he could decline but he was in a bad mood which is why she wanted him to come over… Who would turn her down for that?
So he accepted it. And now he is in her garden…
“Chance used to help me tend my flowers…”
ITrapped wished he was lying that her choices of flowers were really good. The colors for each flower felt like it belonged…
Even unexpected color duos somehow contrast with each other…
But one flowerbed caught his attention.
“…those flowers…”
“Ah… Those are Bleeding Heart flowers… Aren’t they gorgeous?”
“…”
“Very…”
ITrapped felt drawn by its appearance…
“Those flowers represent sorrow and lost love… a lot of flowers have a lot of meanings…”
“I see… You really like flowers… huh?”
“…I do… It was an old habit of mine researching flowers in my free time.”
ITrapped stayed for a while until he left their house.
He was about to return until suddenly his head started hurting randomly.
Everything felt blurry and he started hearing whispers.
And then everything blacked out.
…
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ITrapped opened his eyes and saw Chance. In a flowerfield. Filled with Forget-Me-Nots.
“ITrapped…”
“…”
“C-Chance…?”
ITrapped felt his chest slowly getting heavier than it should be… He didn’t know if this is a dream or a nightmare…
Probably a nightmare. Since he often gets nightmares of Chance.
But
This felt different.
It felt very different.
“…”
“Come.”
“What.”
“Come here. What else, dummy!”
“…”
ITrapped then approached Chance who held his hand…
“Still cold… but this is colder than before…”
“…”
“…Chance…”
Chance looked up and the two looked at each other’s gaze…
“It’s okay.”
He smiled. And that smiled made ITrapped remembered a bunch of warm memories he wanted to bury.
Yet.
All of them stayed.
They stayed to the point it was too painful for ITrapped to remember and treasure.
He didn’t want it to ruin his original friendship.
But he felt like his friendship with Chance was a lot better than with Ellernate and Caleb.
He missed that stupid smirk of joy whenever he randomly got a jackpot.
He misses the look of his stupid golden eyes. Is it stupid if he adored those golden eyes?
He insulted him pretending it was bad but Chance read him like a book and immediately knew he was lying.
“…You look… worse…”
“…I know.”
“Don’t I look pathetic?”
“…ITrapped…”
“…Am I wrong?”
“Am I wrong for saying I look pathetic? Am I wrong for telling the truth, Chance?”
“…”
“…You shouldn’t think like this…”
“And yet I am.”
“I regret my choice. I wished I stayed with you instead of them. Or maybe did something else to keep you and them.”
“I regret killing you but actions can never be undone.”
“I killed you. And you’re no longer here. Just because your parents had the keys for the banlands.”
“…and I hate it.”
“I hate that I realized it once you disappeared into my life. I hate that I saw it too late.”
“I wished I stopped sooner but I was too focused on getting my goal done.”
“I didn’t give you any time. I didn’t regret my actions until you told me those words.”
“!”
“…you… you remember what I said?”
ITrapped then held onto Chance.
“Every word.”
“…”
“…how come…?”
“…It was not in my mind… It was also in my heart…”
“Those words… they meant a lot… and I realized it too late. When you closed your eyes, I wished I could’ve let you stay awake. I wanted to see that stupid smirk again. I want to see your stupid lucky jackpots again.”
“The way you held my hands, the way you comforted me while I was in my worst, the way you didn’t care that I was trans.”
“Which meant a lot to me.”
“…”
“Only I know you’re trans…?”
“Only you. And you kept it. Even after death. You never dared to bring up that conversation unless I was suffering from period cramps…”
“…”
“…ITrapped-“
“…ITrapped isn’t my real name. And yet you made me feel like it was my real name.”
“…I see…”
“…But I will still call you ITrapped. That’s how I knew you.”
“…”
ITrapped held onto Chance and started sobbing.
He hated himself. He hated every action he made.
He hated that he didn’t realize that Chance would’ve been the guy. The guy who would treat him the way he wanted to be treated.
His yearning for someone to hold him?
To care for him?
To tell him sweet words?
To comfort him in his worst?
To kiss his wounds?
To admire him?
It all pointed to Chance. But he was too blind to see that Chance had all of those things he could’ve had.
And yet he threw the opportunity away. He threw it away like it was trash.
And now he regrets it. Every word, every action.
Yet.
“Just keep living. For me?”
“!”
For him. Chance wanted ITrapped to keep living. Even though it would be too painful for him to keep living.
At the same time. It felt harder to keep living.
For ITrapped’s case. He felt like he couldn’t live anymore. Because of everything he did.
And yet.
The person who he killed, betrayed, used… forgave him and wanted him to live life in peace.
He didn’t stutter a word. He wanted ITrapped to live.
“I’ve seen those things. I don’t think I should mention them. But at least take care of them properly… Remember how I taught you?”
“…”
“…yes…”
“Good… Good..”
Chance got out of ITrapped’s embrace.
“I can’t stay for that long. But maybe we can meet again, ITrapped.”
“Wait. You’re going? N-Now?”
“I know. I know you don’t want me to leave. But I won’t. I just can’t let you stay unconscious for a long time.”
“It’s better to be here than there.”
“But you can’t stay here. Not even I can.”
He wanted Chance to stay but his words struck his heart again.
“…when can we meet again?”
“I don’t know. But maybe one day.”
“I promise, we will meet again.”
Chance was about to leave but then ITrapped tried to reach out to him and then…
ITrapped suddenly woke up and he found himself back in the penthouse…?
“…You’re lucky I found you. If it wasn’t for that lady yelling for help.”
“…”
“I passed out. Didn’t I.”
“You did.”
“And a quick question. Who exactly is Chance? You mentioned him while you were resting.”
ITrapped didn’t answer for a few seconds until he mumbled something.
“Someone who I used to know. He is not that important though.”
He wished he was telling the truth. But he isn’t.
And yet Caleb believed him.
“…I guess that makes sense. Now come on, dumbass. You need to eat. That lady said you passed out because you didn’t eat a lot.”
“…Yeah I guess…”
…
Maybe things will change. If he keeps living for him.
Or maybe in another life, Chance would be his everything.
But that will never happen huh.
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Notes:
HELLOOOOOOOO!!!! Hailey here!
Today I’m gonna explain some parts.
ALSO TW/CW FOR THE THINGS IM GONNA MENTION: SH, SLIGHT MENTIONS OF ATTEMPTS, SLIGHT MENTION OF ED?
please do criticize me about these info btw ^_^
QNA TO CONFIRM SOME INFOS!!!
(You can ask me if your question isn’t answered or you wanna know more about the info I answered from the question)
Did Ellernate confess to ITrapped?
Answer: No. He accidentally made it seem like he did due to his lack of knowledge of knowing how to greet formally.Is Ellernate and Caleb just shitty people around ITrapped in general?
Answer: No. They may act rude or act like they are. But they aren’t in general. They just have childish thoughts which causes them to not think maturely.Which ship is gonna be confirmed, EllerTrapped or IChance?
Answer: It is purely up to you!! I’d personally say EllerTrapped due to how Chance is currently (and permanently) dead.Why did you make Chance’s mom someone who loves gardening
Answer: Because I needed an excuse to add the Bleeding Heart flower. Plus that flower is very important for my view of ITrappedHow can ITrapped hold onto Chance if he’s dead?
Answer: It’s because they're in a dream! I want Chance to only communicate with ITrapped using dreams.What does Chance mean by “those things”?
HUGE TW/CW!!!!
Answer: ITrapped starting harming himself to make himself feel better after Chance’s death. Which is also why Chance asked if he remembers how to properly treat his scars.Is ITrapped still yearning for Ellernate’s love?
Answer: Does it look like he’s giving up? /sillyWhy didn’t ITrapped tell Caleb and Ellernate that he’s trans?
Answer: Even though they wouldn’t care if he was trans or not (Because they don’t care about it. As long as he is the same, then he is). They are supportive but it’s just ITrapped’s fault for overthinking thingsDoes Ellernate regret arguing with ITrapped?
Answer: Only if the argument isn’t caused by a stupid reason. For this argument. The cause of it is currently unknown but he does regret arguing with himHow does ITrapped use his head wing?
Answer: Mostly, he would use it to cover his blushing face or crying face. But that’s it mostlyTime finished: 3:38 AM (ORIGINALLY IN HAILEY’S GOOGLE DOCS)
Chapter 2: “The Day You Opened Your Eyes and A Choice I Will Never Forget.”
Summary:
An unexpected day where Caleb and Ellernate finally tries to accept the new ITrapped. It was a good start but then something triggered his guilt.
Notes:
CONTENT WARNING/TRIGGER WARNING:
SELF-HARM (I’ll give out a warning before I continue that part)
MENTIONS OF ATTEMPTS (This will be up to interpretation on what it is.)
CHARACTER DEATH (hi chance)
Maybe slight gender dsyphoria(?)
THROWING UP/VOMITING MENTION
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
It's been a month.
A month without him. A month since his death. A month since they got out. A month. A whole month since he plotted their death.
He thought everything would be easier but. It was the opposite of what he thought would be.
He wished that none of this happened. But everything kept falling down onto him.
ONE BY ONE.
It was getting stressful to the point even Chance’s mother noticed it. Well. Not just her but even Ellernate and Caleb.
The two knew that ITrapped is sometimes a hotheaded person when things didn’t go as he planned.
But it was never to the point that he would be THIS stressed and looks like he is about to break any time.
Ellernate and Caleb knew ITrapped was visiting someone. They don’t know who it is but they seemed important. Someone they don’t know but only he knows.
The two then started talking.
“Okay. Something is really bothering, Isaac. As much as I don’t want to pressure him to talk to us. I want him to tell the truth.”
“…”
“What?”
“Like you two didn’t just argue seriously a month ago…”
“Don’t mention that again.”
“Yeah, sure…”
“Either way, you’re right. He needs to talk to us. He’s avoiding us like we’re strangers to him.”
“That’s what I have been telling you! He’s avoiding us like the fucking plague!”
“Okay, smartass. So now we know what to do. How are we gonna tell him? What I mean by we, I mean you.”
“Wait. What the fuck do you mean ME?!”
“Oh come on. You two argue a lot.”
“You too!”
“Then when was our last argument?”
“I-..”
Ellernate was lost for words. He knew that he doesn’t even remember when was the last time but he can clearly remember his argument with ITrapped
“…”
“Okay fine. You win.”
“Well. Just wait for the right moment. Just give him some space first.”
“…Yeah… I should.”
(MEANWHILE)
“Dear… You should be eating more. You look more pale than the last time you passed out…”
“S-Sorry… It's been… hard…”
“…Not used to losing someone… I can see that…”
“…Y-Yeah… Chance… he was…”
“…”
“He really is the best friend I could ever asked for… someone who I wished I had given him more time to spend it with.”
It felt like a lie for ITrapped. But he felt… lighter.
It feels like he was telling Chance’s mother the truth (which he is btw. He’s in denial)
Chance's mother then kept chatting to him. And everything she does gives him a reminder of Chance…
At least he knows where he got his talkative personality from… Like mother, like son…
“…I see why Chance loves talking to you. You really are comforting to talk with. Just as he told me”
Suddenly the tension in the air changed.
ITrapped felt his guilt building up again. He wanted to throw up but he couldn’t.
He wished he could leave earlier but he didn’t want to be rude to her. He didn’t want to because he wanted to please her. Even if it is just a little bit.
…
And that’s before he zoned out again.
Suddenly, Chance’s voice spoke to him… or so he thought it was Chance.
“ITrapped….”
ITrapped felt tense. He felt like he couldn’t breathe. He tried calming himself down but he started panicking.
He started tapping lightly onto his thighs while looking down and holding onto his tears.
Chance’s mother kept talking until she noticed his shaky breath.
“!”
“Oh dear…”
“…”
Like a mother would, she approached ITrapped and comforted him… She wanted ITrapped to calm down.
She knew how bad these were… Since she has seen one to herself.
“Listen to me… Take slow breaths… Okay?”
“O-Okay…”
…
(ONE HOUR LATER)
ITrapped finally calmed down. Thanks to Chance’s mother.
He then took his leave as she requested him to rest. And he wishes that he does get some rest.
While walking around. He saw a cat. He stared at it before taking his leave.
But then he stopped. Maybe he should get one but he’ll probably forget about his own pet and let it die.
…
So he pushed the thought away and went back to the penthouse.
“I’m here… sorry that took a while-“
“…”
Ellernate and Caleb stared at him. As if they were waiting for something.
“…yeah?”
“We need to talk.”
“…”
“I’ll leave you two alone.”
“Wait. What-“
Caleb then left without a word. Leaving Ellernate and ITrapped alone.
“Before you start talking. I’m sorry.”
“…what…?”
“I-I’m sorry for that argument… I-I know it was dumb to start an argument like that but… You are right… I mean… Don’t people change?”
“…And I…”
“…God… This is embarrassing but…”
“…?”
“…I want to accept the new you, Isaac. And not just that… I want to accept all of you.”
“…You got to be joking…?”
“…I’m not. I took some time to reflect and talk with Caleb. We’ll try our best to accept the new you, Isaac.”
“…I-I see…”
ITrapped felt safe in their arms again… Yet that same fear lingers. Of course they still didn’t know. They’ll never know because ITrapped will never tell them.
Right?
…
…Surely.
“Let’s eat lunch. You look like a ghost, Isaac.”
“Oh-… S-Sorry. I’m gonna get Caleb.”
“Go on, dar- I mean Isaac.”
“…”
“…Okay…”
(TIMESKIP CUZ IM LAZY SOZZZZZZ)
ITrapped, Ellernate, and Caleb were eating pizzas. It wasn’t healthy but the three didn’t care.
It felt like the old times where the three hung out and started messing around in Robloxia. It felt nice to have the same warmth back as it was before-
“Haha!”
“!”
That singular laugh immediately hit ITrapped. It felt the same as him. And it hurts. It hurts to believe that Ellernate did the same genuine laugh that Chance gave him when he told him a horrible joke he got from them.
ITrapped felt sick and immediately rushed into the bathroom. Leaving Caleb confused but Ellernate worried.
And as soon as ITrapped went into the bathroom. He immediately vomited in the toilet.
He threw up until he couldn’t. The two heard him but none of them tried to speak up. They didn’t know how to approach him… They wanted to, but they couldn't.
And a few minutes later. He came out. He felt weak.
Ellernate approached him first and told him to lay down for a bit and then got him a glass of water.
Caleb just cleaned up their mess while leaving the two be.
“Maybe get some rest. We can do it again tomorrow so no worries.”
“…thanks…”
“Get onto a real bed though. A couch is not comfortable enough.”
“…Yeah, yeah…”
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(1 A.M.)
BEFORE YOU CONTINUE READING THIS. HUGE CONTENT WARNING ABOUT SELF-HARM. DO NOT READ THIS PART IF YOU DON’T LIKE SELF-HARM RELATED WRITINGS. I WILL TELL YOU IF IT IS SAFE TO READ!!!
- By Hailey-!
It was late. And ITrapped couldn’t sleep.
Well…
He wasn’t trying to.
Instead of sleeping. Chance’s voice echoed into his ears. He kept hearing him until he couldn’t take it any more.
He took out a knife and slowly started cutting himself.
He wanted to feel like he was SOMEONE.
He wanted to feel proof that he isn’t someone who is heartless enough to kill someone for a goal they wanted to achieve.
He wanted the voices to stop.
He wanted to make himself FEEL better.
Yet.
YET.
Nothing worked. Not even cutting his wrists and arms are helping him.
He knew he needed to do something that only HE DESERVES.
A choice that can ruin his body and mind forever.
But before he can even try to find them. Suddenly. The door opened.
ITrapped panicked and dropped the knife while rushing into the bathroom and locking himself in it.
“…Isaac…? Are you-“
(It's okay now!!! Self-harm scars will be mentioned in this next part but it's more on bandaging it up!!)
Ellernate.
Ellernate went into his room. ITrapped thought he was asleep. He saw him asleep when he took the knife into the room.
Or so he thought.
Ellernate woke up slightly when ITrapped went into the kitchen and grabbed something… As soon as he went in. Ellernate wanted to sleep.
But something was telling him that something will happen.
He didn’t stand up to check until he had enough.
When he stood up. He went straight to the kitchen and noticed a missing knife.
He felt like something bad might happen. So he immediately went into ITrapped’s room but heard him mumbling to himself while he was sobbing uncontrollably.
Ellernate felt concerned and immediately opened the door. Only to find out that ITrapped dropped a bloody knife.
“…Isaac…?”
“…”
Ellernate wanted to help him. But he didn’t know how. He couldn’t because he can’t comfort ITrapped the way he needed to be.
So he approached the door and sat down…
He leaned against it. Not wanting ITrapped to open it, but he was willing to listen.
“…Isaac. Please… just tell me… you don’t need to do this alone.”
“…Please… just… Talk to me. Even if you don’t want me to comfort you. I just want to be there for you. You have been there for me and Caleb. Why can’t it be us now? Or…”
“Why can’t it be me this time?”
And those words affected him. Suddenly after that… ITrapped started venting to Ellernate.
“…I killed someone just to get you two out…”
“And I didn’t even realize that person was someone important to me too. I could’ve gone a different path but I was too focused on you two to the point I didn’t think about the things he has done for me.”
“He gave me a warm sense of comfort. And I thought I didn’t need it.”
“He gave me everything. And I gave him death.”
“I feel like an idiot. I feel like a fucking dumbass. More dumber than you or Caleb.”
“I knew I could’ve done something else but all I cared about was only for my own good. I feel so selfish.”
“And now I’m regretting it like I didn’t do anything bad since the start!!!”
He told Ellernate about everything that happened before and after he got them out.
“…”
Ellernate listened to him. He didn’t judge him or at least tried to crack a joke. He wanted ITrapped to feel safe. For once. ITrapped felt his guilt slowly washing away.
And after a few minutes of waiting. ITrapped unlocked the door. Ellernate then stood up and opened the door.
As soon as he saw ITrapped’s scars… He felt a sense of need to help him out.
Until suddenly. ITrapped hugged him and cried onto his chest. Ellernate didn’t know what to do. So he hugged back, hoping that it would help him.
Nothing else happened but just the two of them holding each other out…
(30 minutes later)
Ellernate was helping ITrapped bandage his cuts. ITrapped felt disgusted about it…
“…You might need to take off your shirt… It’s getting in the way… You got a lot on your arms.”
“…o-okay… but promise me something.”
“…hm?”
“…don’t judge me… for this…”
He took off his shirt and Ellernate saw the top surgery scars.
Instead of reacting badly (As ITrapped expected). Ellernate was… curious…
“…You got top surgery…?”
“…yeah… Because I’m… trans..”
“…”
“And you never told me or Caleb…?”
“…Yes… but he knew. He helped me get one. I felt glad he paid it… but I still focused on you two…”
“…I can’t blame you for that. I mean… Isn’t that how me and Caleb got ourselves sent there?”
“We were so focused on ruining it that he didn’t even realize the admins got onto our tracks.”
“…”
“Of course because you two are dumbasses…”
“Wow… You’re quite rude….”
“Hehe…”
“…”
“Now I’ll continue this… Do you need someone to watch you over when you sleep?”
ITrapped stopped blinking for a moment…
“Just for once…”
“…Got it.”
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(THE NEXT MORNING)
Caleb was trying to find Ellernate. He went into ITrapped’s room to ask if he had seen Ellernate but then realized that the two were sleeping together. He then left the room… After he took a photo of them…
…
(SIDE STORY: PART 1)
This is a continuation from what happened in the previous part!
SMALL HEADS UP!!!
- ITrapped’s SH problems will be mentioned but it will not be detailed as it was in the “WHAT A SHAME” Fire Ring angst fic and the previous part of “THE REGRETFUL PRINCE”.
- A slightly suggestive joke is implied but it's very very vague because of SAFETY REASONSSSS!!!!!!
- They makeout /srs
…
ITrapped woke up.
His back hurts. And as soon as he tried to sit up. Suddenly he gets pulled back down to the bed.
“What the hell-“
Before he could even complain more. His face started heating up.
“…”
“…”
ITrapped felt like he couldn’t breathe. Since when did he get into his room? Since when did they fall asleep together? Since when-
…
Oh.
Right.
He remembered. As soon as he tried to lightly push Ellernate away, he saw the bandages.
He remembered how Ellernate didn’t comfort him and chose to listen. Even though he wished he did comfort him.
Ellernate listening to his problems and wanting to accept him for who he is now, his chest started to feel lighter.
He felt safe in his arms. So he then took things slowly.
Slowly trusting the two again. Wishing that it won’t end up like him.
“…”
“…How could I forget…”
ITrapped felt lost. Just looking at Ellernate’s resting face…
He felt like he wanted to take something…
He felt himself getting closer to Ellernate.
“…”
He was about to give Ellernate a kiss until suddenly he woke up
“…?”
“Isaac?-“
A pillow then suddenly covered his face while ITrapped immediately sat up and backed away but immediately fell down onto the floor.
“SHIT!”
ITrapped hit his head and rubbed it slightly while Ellernate, who noticed what he was trying to do but didn’t care about, got concerned about ITrapped falling down.
“Are you okay, Isaac? You fell down pretty rough…”
“I’m perfectly fine, Nate.”
He then stood up and turned away. Avoiding Ellernate’s gaze. He felt embarrassed that he almost did it again.
It wasn’t the first time ITrapped has attempted to steal Ellernate’s first kiss.
The first time he did is when he got drunk with him but Caleb interrupted so the mood got ruined.
Ellernate chuckled. Remembering all of ITrapped’s failed attempts and all those moments he used his wings to cover his reddened face…
It was cute. He found it cute that ITrapped always uses his wing to cover his embarrassment.
Caleb and Ellernate would usually make fun of it. But secretly, he always loved it.
“Embarrassed now, hm?”
“Shut up.”
“You and I know this isn’t the first time.”
“You did not-”
“Well I did.”
“…”
“I hate you.”
“Do you? Or is that your way of telling me that you do love me.”
“!!!”
“SHUT UP-“
“Who the hell is yelling- Oh. You two are finally awake.”
Caleb walked in the room. He looked like he was judging the two of them (Maybe because he knew the two slept together).
The two stared at Caleb. Feeling confused because of how he looked at them.
“Yeah?”
“…”
“Did you two-“
“Don’t.”
“…Yeah sure.”
He then left the two alone. Not believing their excuses.
“He thinks we did that.”
“Well. We did sleep on the same bed.”
“You are not helping at all, Nate.”
“Awwwww is my ice prince upset…~?”
“…”
“I’M YOUR WHAT?!”
Ellernate started laughing. ITrapped’s face was burning with a soft color of red.
He felt so embarrassed that Ellernate kept teasing him. Even in unexpected times. He kept teasing him.
ITrapped wanted to take revenge in his own hands.
But he can’t do it now… just not yet…
(15-20 minutes later)
The three went out to eat at a random diner. Luckily no one recognizes them thanks to ITrapped’s somehow skills to style their hair differently and fashion sense.
Ellernate and ITrapped were seated together as Caleb insisted they should sit beside each other.
ITrapped knew Caleb was implying something. But he couldn’t think of why until suddenly…
“It should be fate that we are seated together. And Caleb is taking a really longgggggg time ordering….”
“Just shut up.”
“And if I don’t, pretty boy?”
“…Don’t test me, Nate.”
“Sure Isaac. I’ll definitely listen to you, darling-”
Suddenly ITrapped pulled Ellernate’s tie closer to his face
“If you’re so brave to flirt with me in a public space, why don’t we just kiss right now, hm? I’m sure you would absolutely love that.”
“?!”
Ellernate didn’t expect for ITrapped to immediately start flirting back at him. He felt lost for words and confused. So he started panicking at the sudden flirty respond.
“Woah there! C-Chill there, Isaac…! Haha…”
“Well, well. Guess who is now embarrassed.”
ITrapped then pulled him closer.
“Come on now, love. Don’t you like this?”
“…I-I… U-Um
“Out of words now huh, Nate?”
“Come on now, love…”
ITrapped pulled his tie and the two’s lips were basically ghosting each other.
They were about to kiss until suddenly…
“Wow. Of course you two have no shame.”
“…”
“Rude.”
“…H-Hey Caleb… what took you there so long…!”
He crossed his arms and stared at both of them. He sighed and then sat at the opposite chair of them while the two sat down properly.
Ellernate wished they didn’t get disturbed… But maybe… Maybe he would be feeling this disappointed…
.
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Caleb was gone. Thankfully gone. He went outside to buy groceries again because they ran out.
It was only him and ITrapped. And of course with that advantage.
The two continued their little game of teasing and dominance.
Ellernate held onto ITrapped’s waist while ITrapped wrapped his arm around his neck.
He slowly pulled Ellernate deeper, he wanted Ellernate to taste him.
He wanted him to feel every part of him.
He wanted Ellernate to make him forget about his problems.
He wanted him to make him feel like he’ll get drunk in his kisses.
And he loved the treatment he is receiving.
Ellernate was holding him, not out of lust but out of genuine affection and love… maybe a bit of desperation but it didn’t matter.
He just wanted Ellernate all to himself.
That may sound a bit greedy but it didn’t matter for the both of them.
“H-haah… God… I want you so bad…”
“I know.”
“And I want you too. I just…”
“…”
“I don’t know honestly. Are we just… Doing this out of desperation?”
“…”
“I’m not. But if you are…”
“…”
“…I’ll wait for you, I’ll wait for as long as you need.”
“I’ll always wait for you until you give me the sign. The sign where I can show you how much I truly love you.”
Ellernate felt… relief. He thought that ITrapped would force him to. But he didn’t.
If he was willing to wait for Ellernate to date him when he knows he’s ready.
Maybe he’ll be ready to kiss all of his problems away.
They then continued showering each other with kisses.
And in each kiss, it keeps getting more passionate and more comforting.
Even though the two know they are kissing out of desperation…
They can’t help but feel like they were the last pieces a complete puzzle needed.
Maybe Ellernate can learn how to love ITrapped fully… maybe…
Notes:
Meep idk
Chapter 3: “An Never Ending Nightmare But A Light Is There To Guide Me”
Summary:
A normal hangout with Ellernate! Right…?
Notes:
HUGE WARNING ABOUT:
- ITRAPPED HARMING HIMSELF AGAIN. (Sorry he aint free rn)
- Implied murder (Aka Chance)
Nothing much honestly but expect ITrapped angst.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
…
It felt empty.
It felt cold.
Everything was black.
It was like an endless void.
ITrapped hated it.
But then, he saw a familiar figure in the distance.
He then approached them. Slowly as he knows its risky to approach a random guy in his dream.
When he noticed it was Chance. He ran towards him but suddenly stopped once he noticed that it was the same body when he killed him.
“…”
ITrapped froze in place.
He felt afraid. He felt guilt. He felt regret.
“Chance” turned around and stared at ITrapped with their empty eyes.
“ITrapped…”
“Y-You’re not him. You can’t be…”
“Oh I am him… The same him you killed…”
“No… N-no…”
“Still denying the truth…?”
“Chance” approached ITrapped. Cupping his face… showing off his “love” for ITrapped.
ITrapped felt uncomfortable. He knows this isn’t the real Chance. But a part of him tells him that it is.
“You know…”
“…?”
“I love the way you look right now…”
“Pathetic… Open… Vulnerable…”
“…Haha! You look like you have seen a ghost!
“…”
He couldn’t say anything. He felt lost. Confused. Shaken up.
“I-“
“If you have shown the way you love me…”
Suddenly. “Chance” took out the darkheart. He held it and then slowly approached ITrapped.
ITrapped then backed away, sensing the danger up ahead…
“Chance” then held ITrapped’s wrist. Stopping him from backing away from them.
“If that’s how you love me… I’ll do the same thing for you.”
“WAIT! STOP IT!-“
Before “Chance” can stab ITrapped. Everything went blank to him
…
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“Isaac….?
“…”
“Isaac?”
“…”
ITrapped woke up. Everything was back to normal.
He looked around to confirm his suspicion. And he is awake (No shit Sherlock lmao)
ITrapped then noticed Ellernate. He felt confused cause he didn’t expect him to be here.
“…Wh-… Huh? Ellernate?”
“Isaac!”
Suddenly Ellernate hugged ITrapped.
ITrapped felt confused but he noticed that he felt shaken up by something.
“…you had a nightmare… I got worried… I was just checking up on you but then suddenly you started shifting uncomfortably.”
“I tried to wake you up but it didn’t work…”
“…”
“…I-It’s alright. You tried.”
“Are you sure that your alright? I’ll stay here for a bit so you can sleep.”
“Yes I am sure. Don’t worry much about me.”
Silence took over until ITrapped spoke again.
“A-Also… please stay…”
“…”
“Got it.”
(3 Fucking Hours Later…. IM SO BOREDDDDDD-)
ITrapped woke up.
He felt someone’s hands wrapped around his waist… He wanted to get up but whoever was holding him felt nice.
He wanted to stay like this. Maybe for the rest of his life.
ITrapped looked up and saw Ellernate’s resting face once again.
He felt himself smiling at the sight of it. Ellernate looked like he’s having nice rest.
ITrapped then cupped his face. He didn’t really care if he woke up or not. He just wanted him.
But…
He can’t have him yet. He needed to wait for Ellernate to give him a sign. Guess they’ll be friends with small benefits for a while… Until Ellernate knows how to love ITrapped for who he is and not from desperation.
While ITrapped enjoyed cupping Ellernate’s face… Suddenly his bedroom door opened.
“Hey Isaac, have you seen my-“
“…”
“…”
The two stared at each other. ITrapped rubbed the back of his neck while Caleb looked at him with a sign of judgement.
In short, he’s totally disappointed that they are still sleeping together and still haven’t started dating yet… After a long moment of silence, ITrapped finally spoke.
“…Y-Yeah..?”
“…”
“Can you two stop flirting or pining in front of me for once? I can’t deal with your lovey-dovey bullshit.”
“…We’re not even together…”
“Not together my ass.”
“Just. Ugh. Nevermind honestly. I’ll leave you two alone. You two make me feel homophobic, jeez.”
“…Rude.”
Caleb then took his leave. Leaving the two (GAY BITCHES) alone again. ITrapped then waited for a while until Ellernate finally woke up.
“Good morning, Nate! How was your sleep?”
“Nothing new. Did you get some though?”
“Yeah… Thanks to you.”
“…Good. I’m still worried from what happened.”
“Okay. I didn’t think that you would be the worry-head type of guy…”
Ellernate then bonked his head out of playfulness. He didn’t really care that ITrapped teased him.
“Owwwwww… you’re such a meanie….”
“Quit the act, Isaac… I know you just want my attention…”
“…”
“Hmph fineeeee… you caught me.”
The two then stared at each other’s gaze.
ITrapped felt warmth filling his chest up… The way he looked at him just made him feel… happy.
He wanted them to stay like this. Maybe forever… And of course the one who ruins the mood is none other than Caleb.
As soon as he coughed to gain the two’s attention. He spoke up
“Are you two lovebirds done yet?”
“…”
“We’re not dating yet.”
“Blah, blah, blah. Yeah okay.”
“Pfft…”
“Since you two make me feel homophobic. Just go outside or something! For fucks sake, stop making me third wheel everytime I see your faces.”
“Yeah, yeah… On it.”
ITrapped froze. Him? Hanging out only with Ellernate? It's been so long since the last time the two went out together. (Caleb already left of course because he’s too homophobic to handle them /silly)
Ellernate then turned his head to ITrapped. He didn’t really know how to ask ITrapped out since most of the time it was always ITrapped who asked first.
“Sooooo… wanna hangout… today…?”
“…”
“OF COURSE!!”
Out of joy ITrapped suddenly tackled Ellernate back onto the bed, hugging Ellernate tightly (ITrapped please no one is taking him away from you).
“W-Woah there!”
“Calm down…”
“Sorry… It’s been awhile since we hung out together.”
“Yeah… you’re right.”
“I’ll get ready first. See you later, Nate!”
ITrapped gave Ellernate a small peck on his cheek and just left without saying a word
“…no homo… right…?”
“…”
“…s-should be.”
(ONE HOUR LATER)
ITrapped and Ellernate are currently shopping. Thanks to ITrapped possession of a black credit card… He bought a lot of new outfits for him and Ellernate. He also bought some for Caleb.
The two were currently in a small cafe. Outside talking while their shopping bags are sitting on the empty seats (since they are seating in a four-seater whatever you call it lmao).
The two ordered something and then kept chatting until they finished their meals.
“Lead the way, prince.”
“…”
“Stop calling me prince…”
“Awwwww… Is someone flustered…?”
“Shut. Up.”
As much as ITrapped wanted to lie. He wanted Ellernate to keep calling him “prince”. It felt nice that Ellernate gave him a small nickname. Or petname.
The two continued walking and chatting. ITrapped then dropped a small horrible joke which obviously got Ellernate laughing.
While the two continued walking, as soon as ITrapped looked at Ellernate. He didn’t see him. Instead he saw Chance. Or so he thought.
When in reality. ITrapped stopped suddenly and zoned out. He didn’t even realize that he started hallucinating in front of Ellernate
“Oh ITrapped… My dear friend… How are you…”
“…”
He didn’t say a word. It was the same Chance from his nightmare last night. He felt the tension in the air change into an uncomfortable feeling.
He wanted to get out of this situation immediately. But then suddenly all of his surroundings turned black.
“…”
He wanted to speak up but he couldn’t. ITrapped’s mouth opened but no words came out. He felt fear choking his throat. He felt himself feeling smaller. He felt his guilt building up.
And worse of all?
He could barely BREATHE.
While he kept hallucinating Chance while Ellernate who was genuinely worried about ITrapped, led him onto a secluded area (Not wanting him to get weirded out for a possible breakdown).
Ellernate tried to call him out but he was too far to reach. He wanted him to snap out of his hallucinations. He knew that this wasn’t good.
“Oh ITrapped… You treat your friends better than me… Do you not love me…”
“…N-no… I-“
“It doesn’t matter. You killed me for them.”
“Did you really care about me? Did you tell me all those pretty lies just for me to believe them? Did you go through all the events I invited you just to gain my trust and only break it afterwards?”
“…”
“You really are cruel, ITrapped.”
“More cruel than you think you are.”
“…”
“But hey.”
“I died right in your arms. Right?”
“S-stop.”
“Just stop. Please.”
“Why would I stop? I didn’t cause this.”
“You did, Isaac.”
“…….”
“What did you just… call me…?”
“Do I have to repeat myself?”
“…you don’t know that name.”
“…”
“It’s a shame, Isaac.”
“Stop. Please stop it…”
But it didn’t stop.
It kept torturing ITrapped. Telling him every single lie he told Chance. Reminded him of everything they did together but in the end, ITrapped threw it all away.
He kept falling into despair until suddenly he heard something. Someone called out his name. He couldn’t process who it was but when he blinked, his surroundings changed back to normal.
As soon as Ellernate cupped his face out of concern… ITrapped immediately hugged him and started crying. He didn’t know that he was hallucinating in front of him.
He felt embarrassed and disgusted
And yet. Instead of reacting negatively… Ellernate reacted with full concern.
“Are you okay??? Isaac???”
Ellernate kept holding onto him until he felt like ITrapped calmed down. ITrapped was thankful that someone like him cared enough.
…
But he could never care for someone like that anymore. Or so he thought to himself.
Ellernate and ITrapped then went home together. Walking back home as if nothing happened.
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!!!! HUGE TRIGGER WARNING. PLEASE SKIP THIS PART SINCE THIS MENTIONS SELF-HARM!!!!! DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU SEE A MESSAGE TELLING YOU ITS SAFE TO READ !!!!!!!!
It was late at night again.
Even though you’d expect people to be asleep around this time. ITrapped was awake.
He was awake. But why?
…
He was busy cutting himself. Instead of sleeping.
He couldn’t take it. He wanted the voice to stop. He wanted to forget Chance but he couldn’t.
He tried so hard to forget him. And yet they come back every single fucking time,
ITrapped kept cutting himself. The cuts slowly grew and stained his arms. Blood dripped all over the floor but ITrapped didn’t care.
He was too guilty to even realize that someone already got into the room. And as soon as he felt someone’s hand holding his wrists…
He saw him.
His eyes.
His eyes filled with concern.
“…Isaac…”
“…”
(IT'S SAFE NOW. IT'S NOT THAT LONG SO DONT WORRY ABOUT IT!!!)
Ellernate thought he promised he wouldn’t do it again. But he did.
Though. He wasn’t mad. He understood why ITrapped would do this. He didn’t care but he wanted ITrapped to stop. He didn’t want him to suffer like this.
It hurts for Ellernate. It hurts seeing him in pain because of what he did just to get him and Caleb out of that shitty place. He wants to pay ITrapped back but money isn’t even the right choice.
So. Instead of leaving him to bandage it up himself. He chose to help him.
Ellernate got some things to disinfect the wound and some bandages to roll it the wounds up.
“I’m sorry…”
“I-I wasn’t-“
“Don’t. Please…”
“You already pushed yourself enough today.. Please… Let me take all of your pains away… even if it’s just for once…”
“Please. Let me care for you. Not because I have to. Because I want to.”
“…”
“…s-sure… go ahead…”
Ellernate gave him a small smile and then wiped ITrapped’s tears away… he then continued cleaning and disinfecting ITrapped’s scars…
Suddenly.
He paused, leaving ITrapped slightly confused.
Before he could even ask why he stopped. He suddenly felt a kiss on his arm.
“E-Ellernate…?”
“Hm?”
“Do you have a problem?”
“…”
“N-no… c-continue on…”
“Hm… good.”
And he continued. Continued kissing each scar ITrapped made after he disinfected it and cleaned it.
ITrapped felt happy. He felt happy that someone cared for him. He never thought that someone like Ellernate would be this caring.
He might be a dumbass and someone he often argues with… But he’s the most caring person he has ever met. Other than Chance.
Ellernate kept kissing every scar and each kiss made ITrapped’s heart skip every beat it made. He felt so embarrassed yet this felt so comforting.
And after a while… Ellernate finally wrapped his arms and finished the job.
ITrapped looked away but then suddenly Ellernate kissed his forehead.
“!”
“Let’s sleep now… I’ll be here if you need me.”
“Wait. You’re gonna sleep with me-“
“I don’t want to see you harming yourself again.”
“…”
“Fine then… I’m not complaining… I guess…”
“…Yeah, yeah…. Come here.”
Ellernate then held onto ITrapped. He cupped ITrapped’s face then kissed his forehead again.
“Please… try to stop. At least.”
“…”
“…”
“Please… I hate to see you like this. I want you to recover… please…”
“…”
“…I promise… I’ll try.”
Ellernate then kept holding onto ITrapped. Feeling afraid that he might lose ITrapped, his one and only weakness.
And after a while… The two fell into each other’s embrace…
(THE NEXT MORNING)
ITrapped woke up and found out that Ellernate wasn’t in bed.
He stood up and went outside. And then suddenly an oddly familiar figure was waiting in the living room.
It took a while for ITrapped to process who he is. But once he realized that Ellernate and Caleb were tied up. He immediately knew who he is
“How much.”
“Bold of you to assume that I needed you to pay the debt you owe from us.”
“Then why are you here-“
Suddenly. Mafioso’s sword was pointed at ITrapped’s neck. ITrapped didn’t react. He didn’t even care if he was gonna die in his hands.
“I know what you fucking did to Chance.”
“…”
“Do you have anything to say?”
“…”
“You loved him. Didn’t you.”
“…”
“…and.”
“…I didn’t know.”
“…”
“I-… Nevermind. Sorry isn’t gonna fix anything.”
“…Why does it have to be him out of everyone you could’ve taken it away from?”
“I was THERE when you pretended to call for help. I knew the truth because I was planning to tell him that same day.”
“……”
“Please just stop…”
“How would I stop if YOU caused this yourself.”
“You truly disgust me, Isaac.”
“I know.”
“Why are you still here?”
“I know.”
“Why can’t you just-“
“…I know…”
Mafioso was about to hit ITrapped but then stopped.
“When was that?”
What…?”
“This.”
He then grabbed ITrapped’s arm. He didn’t roughly or tightly hold it. He just held it normally.
“It doesn’t matter-“
“You may not be the type to admit things quickly. But this? This is not the same ITrapped I saw that time.”
“…”
“For what reason is this for?”
“…I’m tired of this bullshit, Sonnellino.”
“Don’t use-“
“I don’t CARE. If you want to kill me to satisfy your need to avenge Chance… DO IT!”
“JUST FUCKING DO IT ALREADY!”
“…”
“No.”
“…”
“Even if I want to. I know Chance is too kind to forgive you. He doesn’t want this.”
“None of us would.”
“…”
“…”
Mafioso then called his goons, telling them to untie Ellernate and Caleb.
“Meet me tomorrow. We’re gonna go somewhere and talk. Just you and me. No one else.”
He then left as his goons followed after him.
“…”
“…Isaac…”
“…”
The trio fell into silence. Until suddenly Ellernate pulled ITrapped into a hug…
“…don’t say something like that again.”
“…”
“…”
Caleb then joined the hug, comforting ITrapped.
ITrapped felt himself feeling overwhelmed… not in a bad way but he felt like he needed this since who knows how long…
He then started crying while still stuck under the two’s warm embrace.
“We’re here. Don’t worry about anything, Isaac.”
“We’ll stay. We promise,”
“You two…. god…”
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Notes:
Hi.
Here are some questions I made and I’ll answer.
What was Mafioso supposed to tell Chance
Answer: He was planning to confess to Chance. (Keep in mind, DoubleFedora in this AU was one-sided due to Chance’s feelings being more stronger for ITrapped)
Did Mafioso want to kill ITrapped
Answer: No. He was supposed to torture ITrapped but then he saw his bandages.
Where is Mafioso gonna take ITrapped? Is it gonna be bad?
Answer: I won’t say it. But it will be bad. But no he is not getting tortured.
When is Ellernate gonna date ITrapped
Answer: Part 7 or 8
Where the actual fuck is Spade (Chance’s rabbit)
Answer: He’s with Chance’s mother!Okay bye and thanks for reading :3
Chapter 4: QNA (TEMPORARY CHAPTER)
Summary:
Nothing really happens here.
Notes:
QNA SESSION TIMEEEEE!!!! Cuz i wanna answer some questions for once and hopefully you guys get an answer you want! I think.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Hi. Just ask me any questions!
DO NOT ASK:
1. Smut
- I can assure you that this fic is nowhere near to that day. I will write smut if I feel like it. But obviously this fic wont have smut because this is angst and fluff only <3
2. Personal questions
- Isn’t this obvious.
3. Anything weird honestly
Okay now go my readers! Ask whatever you want to ask!!!
Notes:
DO NOT ASK ANYTHING WEIRD OKAY???
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