Chapter Text
It was a mistake letting ART go on the unmanned cargo run alone. ART had been asked to stop at HaviSyr prior to meeting me at Preservation. When I suggested that maybe ART should pick me up first; it reminded me it had 148920 hours of service prior to my joining the crew. I don't think it realised how terrifying that was to think about, given I knew what ART got up to unmanned in the last three years of our acquaintance.
Even ignoring the time it picked up a Rogue Secunit for 30 cycles, ART had a habit of getting into trouble/causing trouble to occupy its big brain. Records of its exploits that it had shared with me included: learning aerial maneuvers in an asteroid field, flying close to the event horizon of a black hole to disprove Holism's hypothesis (Pretty sure that one was a thinly veiled murder attempt by Holism) and pretending to be haunted when raiders invaded it that one time (I'd been there for that one. It was pretty fun.)
The point was, ART gets bored when left alone. And a bored ART is a dangerous ART. But apparently I needed to stop being so paranoid and overprotective and ART would be fine, so I let it go on its cargo run without me. Which was definitely a mistake. I had also forgotten that when ART gets a bad idea, usually I'm the one who suffers from it.
Everything seemed fine when it arrived at Preservation. There were no new dents on its hull. No evidence of recent house guests or mad science on a cursory patrol of the ship. I didn't do an in depth patrol because 1) I trusted ART that it would have told me if it had done anything too dangerous or caused any security risks and 2) there was a new season of Galaxy Hoppers: Red out that I'd been waiting for ART so I could watch it.
So it was 6 cycles later when I awoke from a recharge to notice frustration leaking through the feed from ART. My human imitation code sighed and it felt good so I did it again.
ART?
Good morning Secunit.
Ah so that's how it was going to play it.
So where is it?
Where is what?
The experiment that has you so frustrated?
I had mentioned some of the ridiculous situations ART had gotten into unmanned. I didn't even want to get into the mad science I had found in its hull after some unmanned missions where it wasn't busy risking life and limb (metaphorically). Once again, I was not sure why I was the only one who had concerns about it being left alone. Maybe because ART and I had covered up the more ridiculous/dangerous projects before the humans saw how close they were to being blown up.
ART was quiet on the feed. I could feel it attempt to slink away, like I wouldn't notice.
Give it up ART. If you didn't want to tell me then you wouldn't have hinted there was something to tell.
I didn't. ART said affronted. You're just nosy .
And you're broadcasting your emotions on the feed. So where is it?
ART hesitated for 2.2 seconds. You won't like it.
I didn't like the last five experiments. You still told me .
It involves the comfort unit.
Oh.
Star, the comfort unit our crew rescued 145 cycles ago, had been a point of contention between ART and I. I could already feel my threat assessment rising which was ridiculous because 1) I could easily destroy it in a fight and 2) it was not here.
Wait.
It's not here, is it? I asked, annoyed. I don't know why I asked. Where would it be? In a closet?
Yes. It's on the bridge. It's helping me fly the ship , ART said extremely sarcastically. I still checked through all the cameras on the ship. Maybe I should have done a less cursory patrol.
Okay I could still salvage this. I see. Was it on board with you when you were away? I tried to ask casually.
I could be mature. Even if just thinking about it made me want to shoot something. (Inanimate. It wasn't its fault that ART liked its inputs better than mine.)
No. It wasn't on board.
Oh. Okay then. Did it bring it up to annoy me then?
ART once again did that thing where it looks like it's reading my logs but only because it knows me so well.
I didn't bring it up to annoy you. It's…I decided to do more research into the haptic feedback data.
Ah. ART was right. I didn't like it. Though probably not for the reasons it thought.
I should explain.
The comfort unit incident occurred when incidental to our actual mission, ART found an angry mob about to attack a Bordello. A rogue comfort unit had recently been discovered among the prostitutes and apparently the mob was attacking for false advertising or whatever. ART and I were all for attacking the mob back but apparently that was unnecessarily violent. Also Star (the comfort unit), didn't want to stay in the facility now that it had been discovered so it came with us instead.
Which was fine, until I realised that it and ART had been talking. And that ART had asked it for all its haptic data. It didn't exactly give me happy emotions that ART would ask some random unit for sensory data rather than me but it's not like it didn't make sense. Even on the best of days, most touch still made my skin crawl. I still couldn't stand certain temperatures, certain textures. If ART wanted to know what touch felt like, when it wasn't making you consider acid baths, who could blame it?
I could. I could blame it. But mostly I could blame me. Which didn't help my mood any. Neither did ART accusing me of sulking because I'm prejudiced against sexbots (I'm not), don't like the unit (I didn't) and am an antisocial asshole who doesn't like change (I am). It wasn't completely wrong so I didn't exactly correct it.
Which led us to here.
You're not sulking again are you? Art said affronted.
Secunits don't sulk. You still haven't told me what the comfort unit has to do with it.
ART paused for 0.7 seconds and I knew whatever it said next, I was not going to like. I'vemappedit'shapticdatatoadrone , it blurted out. It took me a second to parse its meaning.
You've created yourself a drone to…feel? Using the comfort unit’s sensory data? I didn’t even know how to feel about that.
I am a research transport. Searching out new information and experiences is part of my function
Right. Which didn't explain why it was so frustrated.
So what's wrong then? I wasn't lying when I said I thought ART had let me know something was wrong on purpose. Despite appearances I knew ART was capable of keeping a secret.
I have found… some difficulty in simulating touch from another entity.
Oh.
You want me to...touch you?
Nothing excessive. A handshake
A handshake? I said skeptically
Maybe a handhold, ART rushed , nothing that makes you uncomfortable.
Everything makes me uncomfortable, I almost said. But if ART was asking like this, it had to be something it really wanted. I could deal with a bit of uncomfortable hand holding to give ART what it wanted.
Alright, where is this drone?
Not yet! ART said really really quickly. 0.005 seconds quickly. I stopped and stared at it, unimpressed. (I actually stared at the ceiling but it got the message). There was an awkward pause in the feed. I waited to see if it was going to say anything else. Apparently not.
ART, you're being weird. Like, weirder than usual.
You don't want to know
Pretty sure I do
It's…it’s related to sexual intimacy. It said and retreated from the feed. Like retreated retreated. I could barely feel it. Which was a problem. Mostly because I didn't really know what to say and ART was making it clear it wasn't going to talk first. Also because my first thought was to say, ‘You copied that from it too???’ Which probably wouldn't have been helpful.
I sighed again. I like sighing. It’s right up there with eye rolling for favourite things to do from my human imitation code. Really conveyed the sense that I was giving in against my will.
So…that is also something you built it to do.
ART replied, I am a research vessel, like that explained anything. It also didn’t come any closer in the feed.
Right.
Don’taskDon’task
How…?
I have built devices to stimulate the installed parts.
Oh. I regretted asking. Had it been doing that while we’d been talking? ART had massive processing power that allowed it to perform multiple operations while navigating a wormhole so…probably? I was a little surprised by just how unbothered I was by it. But the question remained why was it so frustrated rather than-
You don’t seem very…. Okay no, I couldn’t say it. I sent footage of Barossa from WorldHoppers instead. They were in bed, post the scene I usually skipped (I had unfortunately seen the scene the first time as it contained plot related dialogue much to my disgust). They were happy and relaxed.
ART crept closer in the feed, like it was a little less sure it should end the conversation immediately and throw me out an airlock. I tried not to take offense that it was still ensuring it had no direct contact with me.
It seems knowing what stimulus is coming affects my responsiveness. My control of the instruments could also be a factor. I’ve been struggling to simulate…I wonder if this is a problem unique to me or if Star would-
Okay no. We were not going to the comfort unit for help.
I can help, I said and immediately cursed that I had not yet got around to installing the 2 second buffer before talking. I stumbled as ART stopped talking immediately and directed 90% of its attention to me. It started poking me and I got multiple diagnostic requests.
Hey! Stop it! I’m fine! I sent it the diagnostic data. ART always got its way sooner or later and now that my stupid mouth had started this, I was warming up to it. Better ART didn’t think I was compromised by malware for the discussion though.
ART ran the data. Then reran the data. Then stared at me. You are repulsed by sexual activity. It didn’t say it like a question but the question was definitely there. I could say ‘not if it’s you’ but I think ART would probably sense the lie and probably fly back to Preservation to drop me off and never speak to me again. So I didn’t lie.
I don’t want to be near it or have sex parts or anything. But you said it was all remote controlled? If you think not knowing what is happening next or having someone else manage the controls would help then…I can do that?
ART was still staring. Having 90% of its attention was a bit like being a 6-legged tiny fauna under a magnifier. Finally it subsided and deliberately brushed against me in the feed. I…I would be amenable to that as an experiment.
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ART dropped an .exe bundle in the feed then shrunk back. It was weird seeing ART be shy. I think it was still waiting for me to say I was joking, or was worried that one wrong word would scare me off. I could try to reassure it for the subjective 50th time or I could get on with it. And I was always better at actions than words. I opened the code bundle.
The drone was in another room. I had both visual and auditory inputs and I played with them now, making sure I was only able to see the top half of the drone. I touched the first setting: vibration, and heard a soft buzzing. Okay so that wasn’t so bad. Actually with the emotional leak from ART across the feed [excitement], [surprise], [warmth], it felt pretty good.
Can you give me full access to your emotional data for the exercise?
ART wordlessly passed them over. It was luxuriating in the soft vibration but also the anticipation felt so much stronger now. It wanted to know what I would do. Hopefully I lived up to it. I could still feel faint [guilt] and [shame] at the edges though. Which wouldn’t do at all. I increased the vibrations and felt a short stuttering in ART’s feed presence. That was more like it. I was starting to get excited now and made sure to project that across the feed.
It was like a logic puzzle. This button made ART shudder in feed for a moment but if I combined these two levels with this button then that made ART unable to talk for an objective 5 seconds and a subjective eternity. It may have mapped that comfort unit but I was the one getting to map it.
Secunit ! ART gasped. You can’t gasp on a feed but I’m pretty sure that was equivalent to one.
No. I said firmly. I’m not finished yet.
It took me a moment to interpret the emotional data that came through and when I did my face went hot. ART liked me telling it no? I mean I knew ART liked to argue with me but. ART liked me telling it no.
I dialled down the vibration and decided to test the other settings. There was [frustration] but also [happiness] [arousal]. Which was…this was ART’s thing. I wasn’t going to question its emotional responses. I turned the speed down as far as it could go and had the apparatus slowly withdraw and thrust. I didn’t care for the sound but that was okay. I could turn down my auditory inputs and keep my focus on the feed. What was physically happening didn’t really matter to me as much as what it made ART feel. What it was feeling now was [frustration] and [anticipation].
Secunit that’s too slow I-
You wanted me involved in your experiment. So I’m going to experiment.
I had a moment’s anxiety then. What if it didn’t enjoy itself or I was ruining its experience? But ART’s processors spiked with [joy]. So the last time wasn’t an aberration. It liked me being mean to it. It was going to regret letting me know that. I messed with the angles of thrust first until I felt another spike of [thrill] and [arousal]. Then very slowly increased the speed. The drone started shuddering and its cooling processors began to overclock.
ART was on the feed, a part of it taking notes, the other part watching my reactions very carefully. No doubt some of it was also off doing wormhole calculations and navigation. I gently poked at the drone’s physical data set without going into too much detail. The drone was stuttering on finishing but it was still stuck. I think I might know where the problem was.
ART, I said sharply. Pay attention. I pulled it towards me then shoved it towards the bot. ART went without a fight and I could sense it buzzing in the feed. I upped the speed and thrust on the device again. Secunit please, ART groaned. This time I didn’t stop. I felt the pleasure peak and the drone writhe and then- the lights went out. ART’s elation was contagious and I took a moment to revel in it before slowly releasing some of the inputs ART had given me.
Three seconds later when the lights were still out, I pinged it.
I got a garbled message in the feed which I’m pretty sure was a mix of Recalibrating and Just give me a damn moment.
After 5 seconds it reached for the .exe file and turned the apparatus off. Oh right, I probably should have thought to do that. It still hadn’t given me any clear words yet.
ART? Are you okay?
I am-I am optimal. That was good. Very good.
It slowly pulled itself back together, picking up some stray inputs it had lost along the way. I’ll admit it felt good to see ART lose its composure. I felt proud. At least until a couple of minutes later when I started feeling [embarrassment] and [anxiety] from ART’s side of the feed.
Thank you. Your help was most appreciated. I have gathered valuable data from the experience.
ART pulled its emotional data back out of my reach when I attempted to untangle the [anxiety]. It was withdrawing from the feed too. Like it thought it had been an imposition. Like it didn’t think I wanted to do this again. I hoped that was it, rather than it not enjoying itself or it not wanting to do this again. Because if so I was about to make a fool of myself.
“We can do better,” came out of my mouth before I could have second thoughts.
What? ART said. It had redropped a couple of the inputs it had gathered earlier.
Well, I was in it now. We can do better. I repeated on the feed. I think part of the problem is you had too many tasks open. Too many inputs and things to run through your processors. Which of course you had to since we were in flight. But I think if we could reduce the amount of things taking up room on your processors then we could do better.
85 percent of ART’s attention was on me in the feed. And this is…something you would like to help with?
I remembered its shame and guilt from earlier. Maybe this was something where I also would have to share my (ugh) feelings. I sent it my emotional data from earlier. My curiousity over what response each setting would elicit. My joy when I made art stutter in the feed. My shared elation from when I was able to- make it lose control.
ART came closer again in the feed and hesitantly curled around me. I didn't like it being so unsure so I lowered my firewall and pulled it as close as I could.
You enjoyed yourself? ART said. It still sounded unsure which just wasn’t right.
I enjoyed myself .
And…and you want to do this again?
We can do better,
I said firmly