A reincarnator’s guide to revenge and getting a hot gender-fluid GF

by Purpleace16

Summary:

One would assume that if you were to wake up as a character from your favorite danmei novel, then you would find a way to avoid the disasters and tragedies of the OG character’s life.

Sadly this is a lot harder than it sounds. So hard that there are barely any changes at all in the end. Your new family still ends up in disgrace and you still end up dead.

On the bright side your knowledge of the modern world (while not helpful in almost anything) does give you the insight to recognize a gender-fluid baddie when you see one. So while you might not have been able to prevent any deaths you are absolutely certain that you (unlike the OG!He Xuan) will not fumble Shi QingXuan.

Follow this Transmigrator on his way to have his vengeance AND find his one true love. He will surely have both! 100% He Xuan will have his way.

Chapter 1

You’ve already read the summary. You already know what this story is gonna be about. Now I’m sure you’re wondering how on earth a reincarnator/Transmigrator let this happen. Aren’t we supposed to know better? Predict what the villain was gonna do and thwart it before he even tries? Somehow ignore the Reverend of Empty Words and outlast him till he starved?

Well I’m sorry to tell you this but this isn’t a trashy power fantasy isekai and I’m no Kirito. Transmigration is often times more like re:zero, full of endless suffering imparted onto regular overconfident humans who are in way out of their depth. We are all simply Natsuki Subaru’s in worlds full of Reinhards, except that we don’t have return by death. Or any god given powers.

Ok, we are getting off topic.

Let’s start over.

I’m He Xuan, a failed Transmigrator and a man(most of the time) on a quest for revenge. And I have recently met and become infatuated with Shi QingXuan, the sibling of my greatest enemy(yes, the gender neutral language is important.). Let’s hope that I can somehow eat my cake and have it too.

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Step one-Love at first sight

I had always been a fan of Shi Qingxuan, in my first life she had essentially been one of the few gender-fluid characters in media I had ever seen. So obviously this translated to me having absurdly copious amounts of merchandise of them, writing tons of fanfiction, and collecting as much fan art of him as humanly possible. That is to say I had been compared to a real life combination of Hua Cheng and He Xuan for my devotion to the my favorite character. I had never considered for even a moment that I would have a chance to be in the same world as her let alone be in the same room as him. It should be every fanatic’s wet dream.

But what I felt wasn’t a joy of any kind.

It was dread.

Even my half of a semester of psychology 101 ass could tell this was bound to be a toxic situation. Unlike Hua Cheng, I had never met Shi Qingxuan. She never saved my life, he never helped me through a deep depression, and they were never a crutch that I relied upon to survive. Until I died they were just a fictional character that I “loved” and not in any real sense. Like how a child loves a doll, something that is precious to you but ultimately doesn’t impact your life.

Completely harmless if a little odd.

But not anymore.

During my second life, as a mortal called He Sheng, I knew objectively that I might meet them in the future but it felt so far away. I was a Transmigrator! I knew how to avoid my fate, I was certain that I would live a long, healthy, and happy life. I felt invincible. What was the point of worrying about meeting a character that I was going to bend fate just to avoid.

How incredibly wrong and stupid I was.

The point is that until this moment, after years of tragedy, suffering, plotting and just trying to survive, I am finally grasping what my favoritism is going to cost me. It had never felt so real until now.

I am about to meet Shi QingXuan. The character that made me feel seen. The reason for my second family’s suffering. The inspiration for my fan collection. The catalyst for my isolation and ruin. My first fictional crush.

Even with all of my carful planning I still doubt that I will have the strength to do this.

These feelings of artificial infatuation, if found out, would be slightly creepy at best, but parasocial and disturbing at worst. It would crush my plans to dust and ruin my revenge forever. Yet at the same time, the thought of harming her for empty revenge filled me with irrational dread. I had gone over my plans to enter the plot over a thousand times. I’ve been prepared for the arrival of Ming Yi for almost 50 years, longer than the dude has been alive, I’ve been in contact with Hua Cheng for at least 200 years at this point and I’ve learned everything to do with the previous earth masters. All for my revenge against the current water master.

The OG!He Xuan had the right idea getting close to Shi QingXuan to get to Shi Wudu, there is literally no other way for me to get close to him.

I know what I must do and why, but it doesn’t make it feel any better.

_________________________________________ This story is not finished but if I don’t post this scrap I might never post anything at all. I’m coming back baby, I’m coming back for you. This is only temporary