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Mitsuzane stumbled, knocking something off a desk as he braced himself with one arm as an afterthought. The other arm was clutching at his head like he could force the spiraling thoughts away with just a palm.
"Pathetic," his brother('s ghost) sighed next to him, "Look at how far you've fallen, Mitsuzane. This is all the result of your own actions. You pushed everyone away and now you've become like this. No one can even stand to be around you."
"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP," he screamed.
The words bit even more because he knew they were true. Everything his brother said was true, but he just didn't know what to do anymore. He couldn't change the trajectory he found himself on, hurtling towards the end of a broken track, nothing but a sheer drop waiting for him below.
"Honestly? You deserve everything you have coming to you."
His brother grabbed him by the neck, forcing him against the rough surface of the wall. He choked and grasped at the hand, trying to tear it off.
"You'll deserve this just as much." He growled, leaning in and pressing his mouth over Mitsuzane's in some semblance of a kiss.
He couldn't breathe. His mouth and throat were blocked and he couldn't get a breath in. His vision swam, growing dizzy from lack of oxygen. His brother's presence seemed to cover him, trapping him and smothering him in every way. He couldn't fight back. He might have been crying before but now he was sobbing, tears running down his face.
He was getting hard.
A hand grabbed his crotch roughly, squeezing hard enough he couldn't tell if it hurt or felt good.
"Disgusting."
His entire body shook as he sobbed. He couldn't tell if he wanted to pull away from or push into the intrusive hand. The sickest part is that he knew on some level, deep down, that this was happening because he wanted it. Wanted his brother to touch him, to pay attention to him. He didn't want it like this, but it's what he deserved it, wasn't it?
"It's what you deserve, isn't it?"
He struggled as hard as he could, lashing out and knocking more things off the desk, but it was pointless. The hand stayed, and he still couldn't breathe. He thought he was going to pass out. He throbbed, thrusting his hips desperately against the friction as if rushing to finish before he finally lost consciousness. His brother sneered, watching him with clear distain as he came in his pants. His legs gave out.