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to love and be loved

Summary:

Set during the phase when Sheng Shaoyou half-forgives, half-tolerates Hua Yong and the two still haven’t properly reconciled:

Shaoyou still remains a little angry and a lot wary - unsure whether he should trust this man after all his lies. An unexpected incidence pushes him to finally confront his feelings and recognize Hua Yong’s devotion. It also leads to Hua Yong realizing that love is more than one-sided reverence.

Notes:

For convenience' sake, Sheng Shaoyou does not take Hua Yong for an alpha in this fic. It had been made clear, or he simply never presumed the other to just be an alpha of some kind and asked for an explanation... for whatever reason, he knows (believes) Hua Yong is an enigma.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: found ourselves in a situation

Summary:

Hua Yong had protected him. Most naturally, like it was an instinctive part of his nature. The time when he'd rescued Shaoyou from the kidnappers or any other time he was likely saved from trouble, he'd never really consciously witnessed anything. But this time, he did. Seeing is believing, as they say. And he could be sure this was not an act.

Chapter Text

It happened when they were traveling back from one of Sheng Shaoyou's company events.

Although the man had not completely forgiven Hua Yong for everything and the bitter anger still shining through in between, he had at least accepted the ghost orchid's presence in his life. Hua Yong was happy playing his secretary and cook. Spending basically all their time together gave him a better chance to win over Sheng Shaoyou's heart again.

The evening had started well enough. Hua Yong had driven them to the venue, sneaking glances at his mate in between watching the road. Shaoyou had been in a good mood too, not berating Hua Yong for his actions and occasionally even letting a hint of a smile slip unconsciously.

It was only during the event itself, when some arrogant alphas tried to flirt with the beautiful 'omega' secretary, that Mr. Sheng's scent turned sour. Hua Yong had hoped his alpha would come and express his possessiveness, declare to those leeches that this man was off limits. But nothing of the sort happened. 

Sheng Shaoyou only gripped his glass tighter and busied himself with social networking, leaving the younger man alone to fight off the unwanted advances. In fact, throughout the event Shaoyou barely even interacted with him besides occasionally glancing his way. Hua Yong kept his disappointment to himself, and willed the unbearable event to finish so he could hurry back to the comforting peace of their shared apartment.

Afterwards, Sheng Shaoyou took the wheel himself, refusing Hua Yong on the grounds that he drove "recklessly" and did not "focus on the road properly." Even as he conceded, Hua Yong still felt the need to defend himself – after all, he would never endanger his Mr. Sheng. And then the whole discussion descended into a landslide of pointless arguments.

In hindsight, Hua Yong should've just stayed quiet and taken the complaints. But during the drive, Shaoyou seemed to bring up so many different reasons for his dissatisfaction that it got under his skin, tapping on insecurities Hua Yong didn't think he had.

He knew he was in the wrong for hurting Mr. Sheng before. He knew he had a lot to make up for. But he really had been trying his best to be the most supportive, helpful, and loving partner he could be for Sheng Shaoyou. To be constantly demeaned for his mistakes and never appreciated made him feel sad.

So their argument – and more importantly, the underlying aggrieved feelings that accompanied each verbal attack – distracted them from danger.

Hua Yong's sharp senses alerted him to the glaring headlights of a truck and the sound of skidding tires closing in fast. It was going to ram their car within seconds. Too late to avoid a collision now. He could already estimate where it would hit. 

The driver's side. Sheng Shaoyou's side.

It barely took him a second to react. He unlocked his belt, moved his legs, and threw himself at Sheng Shaoyou, wrapping around him like a koala – one hand gripping Sheng Shaoyou's seat, the other wrapping over his head to bring it toward his own shoulder, encasing his body protectively. In the next second, the truck crashed into them.

Thankfully the car was high quality, and it wasn't as bad as it could have been. But it was still a serious crash. They were violently thrown quite a distance away. The sound of metal bending, glass breaking, and airbags deploying all blended into one. For a moment there was just ringing in Hua Yong's ears.

The shock of the crash stunned Sheng Shaoyou for a moment before his mind caught up and he started to squirm, trapped between the seat and the immovable body of Hua Yong. But Hua Yong himself didn't feel like moving so much, he just wanted to rest himself against his beloved for a moment as his head spun. It was only when Sheng Shaoyou started to make noises of discomfort that he released his strong grip and moved back slightly, as much as the crushed space allowed.

"Are you hurt anywhere?" he asked, looking frantically and checking for any possible wounds.

He received no response, so he looked up only to see Shaoyou staring back with an intense look in his eyes.

"Sheng Shaoyou..." There was a whining tone to it now, like Hua Yong's mind wouldn't ease until he had an answer confirming his mate's wellbeing.

"I am not hurt." And it was true too. Besides some minor cuts and a few places his body ached, which might also just be because of how his muscles had tensed, he was unharmed. All because of one lunatic who had covered him with his whole body.

"A-Yong... what about you – where –"

The little bastard let out a soft laugh before leaning even closer, to the point their noses touched. "Is Mr. Sheng worried about me? Did you forget I am stronger than I look, stronger than even you, my dear alpha?"

Those words, uttered in that proximity, made Shaoyou flustered and embarrassed for worrying about the enigma. So he focused on something else.

"What the hell was this?"

The man sitting on his lap simply blinked innocently. 

"You know what I mean, you maniac! Why the hell are you on me? Is this some drama? Am I some omega who needs to be saved with a gesture like that?!"

"But Mr. Sheng… My move was better and more efficient... than those silly attempts they show on television."

"Nonsense." Hua Yong's voice had started to sound breathless now, Sheng Shaoyou was already back to worrying again. Focusing his senses, he could also smell blood.

He started patting Hua Yong down and looking for signs of injury. He ignored the comments about getting handsy in the car and whatever else was coming out of the crazy man's mouth. His fingers touched something wet by the time he reached Hua Yong's back, and the way the steering wheel was digging into him was also concerning. Broken ribs might explain the shortness of breath.

They had to call someone. The road was too isolated – there was no crowd that would call for help on their behalf. Shaoyou didn't hope for the truck driver's help either. From what he could hear, the driver seemed to be running away.

Sheng Shaoyou didn't need medical attention, and Hua Yong didn't seem to be doing too badly either – alert, conscious, talking his usual nonsense. But stuck like this, there wasn't much they could do about anything. Despite how damaged it looked, Sheng Shaoyou still tried to push open his side, but it just wouldn't budge. So they could only try the passenger seat's door.

"Hua Yong, we need to get out. Can you move to open the other door?"

"Mmm, okay."

Hua Yong shifted to move, but his position had him sandwiched with no room for movement. He tried to push back against the steering wheel to make himself space. It wasn't something he should've struggled with, his abilities as an enigma made him the strongest being. But as soon as he pushed, a strong wave of pain seized his spine. It was hard to pinpoint the source, but it was a little more pain than he could manage while keeping up the appearance that there was no pain at all.

He took a deep breath, explained he was just stuck, and then tried again. The movement brought an even sharper pain – and this time he could tell exactly where it came from. Ah, this might be troublesome. 

He planned to ignore it and try again, but his alpha was able to sense it somehow. Sheng Shaoyou dug his fingers into Hua Yong's arms and told him to stop trying. But he could tell his mate was more distressed now – could hear his heart beating faster. It must be the cramped space, Hua Yong thought. Mr. Sheng is bothered that he's stuck like this. He patted Shaoyou's shoulders in comfort. I will get him out.

When Sheng Shaoyou saw the determined look on the maniac's face, he knew he was about to disregard everything he just said and do something dangerous again.

There was a sudden burst of pheromones, and Hua Yong's eyes glowed in a shade of magenta as he pushed back yet again. The metal groaned as it shifted, and suddenly there was more space between them. Before Shaoyou could even react, Hua Yong moved with inhuman speed, turning to the side and stepping through the other door. He offered his hand with dramatic elegance, gesturing for Shaoyou to step out as well.

Sheng Shaoyou let out an incredulous huff, grumbling “Show-off,” as he climbed out. 

Once he was out of the wreckage, he quickly grabbed his phone to call the authorities, informing them of the situation. He also asked for an ambulance without specifying the details. Even though it didn't seem serious, he knew there was something wrong with Hua Yong, and it was better to get checked out by professionals.

When he turned around to look, Hua Yong was slightly leaning against the car lazily, seemingly recovered from the little discomfort he'd shown while making space, posing like a cat as he stared at him intently. Seeing him safe after a crash like that, Sheng Shaoyou was almost glad Hua Yong wasn't an omega. Otherwise, he'd have hardly survived taking that kind of impact. Shaoyou knew that even as a top-class alpha himself, he might not have avoided serious injuries if it wasn't for this rare enigma shielding him like that.

Right now he could not summon the anger he had been holding on to. He'd been conflicted all this time, unsure about what to do with the scammer who wouldn't leave him alone and how to handle his own feelings for the man. But all the doubts, the hurt, the frustration – it was all muted out in that moment.

He recalled the second he'd seen Hua Yong’s body language shift before the accident. Before he could make sense of it, he was wrapped in a tight, warm embrace as the world crashed around them. Hua Yong had protected him. Most naturally, like it was an instinctive part of his nature. The time when he'd rescued Shaoyou from the kidnappers or any other time he was likely saved from trouble, he'd never really consciously witnessed anything. But this time, he did. Seeing is believing, as they say. And he could be sure this was not an act. 

Still, he wasn't pleased with Hua Yong's reckless disregard for his own safety. It’d almost brought Shaoyou to the brink of a heart attack. But for the moment, he was just glad they were both relatively safe. He let out a breath, rested his back against the poor car too, as he looked up at the stars.

It was kind of nice like this. To share a silent moment with him. Simply listening to each other breathe.

 

Then, he noticed something else. There was an unusual loudness to Hua Yong's breaths. He turned toward the young man and saw his skin glisten under the moonlight. There was a distant, glassy look in his eyes. 

"Hua Yong, what's the matter with you?" Even as he asked, he was already searching for signs of injury. Hua Yong was pale and sweating and leaning for support like he might fall. Was it his back? Shaoyou hurriedly pushed up the back of his coat to look underneath with his phone's torch. His silly partner was protesting already, attempting to somehow distract him.

He let out a low growl. "Shut up and let me look." 

There was a cluster of bruises where the steering wheel must've pressed, but they didn't look serious enough to suggest internal bleeding. The cuts on his back seemed to have stopped bleeding, almost scabbing over now. And yet, the smell of blood was still strong. He turned his attention to Hua Yong’s posture and scanned for abnormalities. What had earlier seemed like a relaxed posture, could now be recognised as a calculated attempt to hide how he was purposefully avoiding putting any weight on the right leg.  

As soon as Shaoyou tried touching his right thigh, Hua Yong twitched. Ah, there it was. It was a minor reaction but a telling one. Shaoyou could see that the thigh was definitely bleeding. He tsked and wrapped his hand around the wound to put pressure on the bleeding.

Two things happened simultaneously: Sheng Shaoyou felt something sharp and hard poke his palm, and Hua Yong let out a cry of pain. Shaoyou had already withdrawn his hand in reflex, but he was horrified at somehow causing the resilient enigma to react like that. It was an unexpected sound that lasted only two seconds, it still managed to send a chill down Sheng Shaoyou’s spine. Something was wrong.

"What – " He looked down at his hand, then back at the leg. The blood was a much brighter red than it should be. His fingers were trembling slightly as he carefully moved the slightly torn fabric of Hua Yong’s pants aside.

"It's nothing serious, Mr. Sheng…" 

"You be quiet!" Sheng Shaoyou used his phone's light again, angling it carefully. The wound wasn't just bleeding – a piece of shrapnel was sticking out of it. While the part protruding looked small, it was probably lodged in deep. If he’d read the signs right, it must've hit an artery. Damn it!

As the reveal took away all motivation to keep up the pretense, Hua Yong lost his balance and his legs gave out as if he'd lost all his strength at once. Shaoyou caught his weight and slowly eased him down to lay flat. He was breathing rapidly and seemed on the verge of passing out. But his dark eyes were still fixed on Sheng Shaoyou's face like it was his anchor to living.

The look was pretty similar to the one from that day they were caught in the earthquake. No, he looked even worse. Or maybe it was because Shaoyou was more worried this time, not stewing in anger and disbelief over being deceived, that it seemed that way.

God, he hoped the ambulance would hurry the hell up already!

To ease the deep frown etched on his beloved's face, Hua Yong tried to say something helpful. "It's just because – it penetrated the bone there… just need to – pull that out. Once it's out, I'll heal..."

But it did not have the desired effect. Instead, Sheng Shaoyou looked livid now. Hua Yong didn't know what he'd said wrong! His mind was too fuzzy and thinking was a bit of a struggle at the moment. 

"The bone. In your thigh. You mean, the femur… You – You fractured your freaking femur? You must've felt it – there's no way you couldn't have. And yet you dared to move? To climb out and stand on it?! You lunatic, you absolute– " A soft squeeze on his arm made him stop his yelling.

The man looked pitiable, fighting to keep his eyes open and still all concerned about Sheng Shaoyou's mood. "I just... wanted to help, Mr. Sheng… please don't scold me..."

Sheng Shaoyou sighed. This really wasn't the right time or the place for this. He would have this talk when the other party was less in pain and more conscious. For now, he just resigned himself to handling this messy situation. 

Even for an enigma, he wasn't sure if it was wise to remove that piece of metal before the medical professionals arrived, no matter what the idiot claimed. He yanked off his tie and wrapped it tightly above the wound as a makeshift tourniquet. Hua Yong’s body tensed under his hands.

It must hurt a lot, but Hua Yong made no sound. Only once Shaoyou was back to holding half his torso up, Hua Yong leaned all his weight on him and buried his face in his lover's neck as if to hide. And there, he finally allowed himself to express a small moan of pain.

Shaoyou felt his eyes burn.

He gently moved the sweat-drenched hair back from this beauty's pale-grey face. He also did his best to release his soothing pheromones, though he wasn't sure if it helped. Hua Yong, that infuriating bastard, still looked at him through half-lidded eyes, with lips twitching weakly as if in a smile.

Overcome with emotion, Sheng Shaoyou pressed a kiss to his head. Silently wishing that the crazy person he’d fallen for would be alright.

 

Notes:

Thoughts?