Work Text:
“I don’t see what the big deal is, I mean, it’s not like we’re a business that needs a schedule to run.”
Tracker turned to Kristen with a droll stare, before gesturing at the gathered people. They had divided into three groups, the ones who didn’t care, the ones who were obsessing over how to schedule out how they’d spend their time, and the ones who were acting as the go between for the two groups.
“Babe, I love you, but there are… too many people who cannot stand you for you to be so cavalier about this,” Tracker declared. Kristen wilted, but fell down besides Nara, Ivy, and Fig. Tracker understood the disapproval of a schedule, but… there were so many people…
Tracker turned to her partners in wrangling these hopeless idiots. Lucy and Gorgug just shrugged, before they went back to the others. Ayda and Adaine perked up as they approached, while Kipperlily was still arguing over the crystal. After a few moments, Kipperlily hung up with a groan.
“Alright, Aelwyn’s not coming. She’s too busy fucking Fabia—“
“Ew,” Adaine interrupted. Kipperlily scowled at it, prompting them to raise their hands. “What? That’s my sister! I don’t need to hear about who or what she’s getting it on with!”
“Well, you’re here, so you better get used to hearing about people fucking!” Kipperlily snapped. Adaine bristled, looming over the half-tiefling.
“Watch it Snickerdoodle,” Adaine growled. Tracker forced herself between them, keeping the two from each other’s throats.
“Alright, easy you two, you don’t need to stay here long. Let’s just iron out the details, okay?”
The feuding duo huffed, before turning away. Ayda calmly cleared her throat, getting the attention of everyone who cared. “While Mary Ann, Aelwyn, and Gertie have not managed to arrive, I believe that Mary Ann’s singular interest in Gorgug, and Gertie’s singular interest in Tracker should ensure that they will not be too difficult to plan around.”
“Alright, next we may as well discuss our situation,” Adaine volunteered. They cast a spell on the table, a graph forming which connected Gertie to Tracker, and Gorgug to Mary Ann. “Ayda and Fig are dating Gorgug, and I belong to them, and that’s almost everything. Though, Kipperlily is also owned by Fig, so that’s important to note. Hmm. Devilfuck, are you okay with just getting Fig when she and you are in Hell?”
“Yes, I can live with that,” Kipperlily said. She did frown though. And turned to Adaine with an accusatory finger. “That means you aren’t allowed to visit Hell though.”
“Wha—“ Adaine began to stammer, but Ayda set a hand on its head, prompting it to calm down before they flew into a frenzy. “Fine. Deal.”
“Alright, so if we’ve got Fig’s branch sorted, do we move onto Kipperlily’s whole side?” Gorgug asked. She tended to be more stable than the others when it came to relationships. The table nodded, and they turned to Kipperlily.
“Fine. So, I am in a relationship with Lucy, Bax, and Ivy, it’s just the four of us. Though, Lucy’s got her whole Cleric Orgy thing, so I don’t know if we’re planning that now,” Kipperlily said. Lucy choked, but Kipperlily pressed on. Tracker shook her head, and Kipperlily nodded. “Okay, good. So, I’ll spend time with Fig when she’s in Hell, and then when Tracker’s in Fallinel, me and Lucy will have our time?”
“Sounds good, but what about Ivy?” Tracker asked. She turned to the ranger lounging beside Fig and Kristen.
“Eh, I’ll slip in when I feel like it,” Ivy announced. Which… was entirely too frustrating for everyone trying to figure out how this situation would work.
“Throw Oisín at her, she’ll be too busy soothing his ego to mess with our plans,” Adaine offered. Ivy sat up sputtering, but Fig just flopped on top of her, not letting the elf object. Everyone else simply nodded as the plan was made.
“So, now do we handle Tracker’s branch?” Ayda asked, the illusion now accommodating Kipperlily’s connection to Lucy and Ivy. “Alright, let us sort out the Cleric Orgy, sans Kristen. We have Nara, who will be approached whenever someone is in Fallinel, but primarily she and Tracker will be together. Tracker will mostly be with Kristen when she’s in Spyre, unless anyone has an issue with that?” There was a head shake from the group, and Ayda nodded. “Lucy will travel to and from Fallinel, but when she’s here, I assume she will be with Bax and Kipperlily?”
“Yes, I will,” Lucy decided. Ayda nodded, the graph expanding to connect all of them. “Though… I think that means we need to deal with… the Kristen problem.”
At that, the lady of the hour pulled herself up, and strolled over. “The ‘Kristen Problem?’ What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”
In response, Adaine edited the graph, adding every connection to Kristen between them all. The love hate relationship Kristen had with Kipperlily and Gertie, the Clerical Orgy, and then the Gorgug and Fig dating. Kristen looked at it, before turning back to the rest with a shrug.
“Yeah? What’s the issue?”